diff options
Diffstat (limited to '885-h/885-h.htm')
| -rw-r--r-- | 885-h/885-h.htm | 6512 |
1 files changed, 6512 insertions, 0 deletions
diff --git a/885-h/885-h.htm b/885-h/885-h.htm new file mode 100644 index 0000000..46bb5e2 --- /dev/null +++ b/885-h/885-h.htm @@ -0,0 +1,6512 @@ +<!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Strict//EN" +"http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-strict.dtd"> +<html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml" xml:lang="en" lang="en"> +<head> +<meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html;charset=utf-8" /> +<meta http-equiv="Content-Style-Type" content="text/css" /> +<title>The Project Gutenberg eBook of An Ideal Husband, by Oscar Wilde</title> + +<style type="text/css"> + + p { margin-top: .75em; + margin-bottom: .75em; + } + H1, H2 { + text-align: center; + margin-top: 2em; + margin-bottom: 2em; + } + H3, H4, H5 { + text-align: left; + margin-top: 1em; + margin-bottom: 1em; + } + body{margin-left: 10%; + margin-right: 10%; + } + table { border-collapse: collapse; } +table {margin-left:auto; margin-right:auto;} + td { vertical-align: top; border: 1px solid black;} + td p { margin: 0.2em; } + + .smcap {font-variant: small-caps;} + + div.gapspace { height: 0.8em; } + div.gapshortline { height: 0.3em; width: 20%; margin-left:40%; + border-top: 1px solid; } + + </style> +</head> +<body> + +<div style='text-align:center; font-size:1.2em; font-weight:bold;'>The Project Gutenberg eBook of An Ideal Husband, by Oscar Wilde</div> +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and +most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions +whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms +of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online +at <a href="https://www.gutenberg.org">www.gutenberg.org</a>. If you +are not located in the United States, you will have to check the laws of the +country where you are located before using this eBook. +</div> +<div style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:1em; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Title: An Ideal Husband<br /> +A Play</div> +<div style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:1em; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Author: Oscar Wilde</div> +<div style='display:block;margin:1em 0'>Release Date: April, 1997 [eBook #885]<br /> +[Most recently updated: June 7, 2021]</div> +<div style='display:block;margin:1em 0'>Language: English</div> +<div style='display:block;margin:1em 0'>Character set encoding: UTF-8</div> +<div style='display:block; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Produced by: David Price</div> +<div style='margin-top:2em;margin-bottom:4em'>*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK AN IDEAL HUSBAND ***</div> + +<h1>AN IDEAL HUSBAND</h1> + +<p style="text-align: center">A PLAY</p> + +<p style="text-align: center"><span class="smcap">by</span><br /> +OSCAR WILDE</p> + +<p style="text-align: center"><span class="smcap">methuen & +co. ltd.</span><br /> +<span class="smcap">36 essex street w.c.</span><br /> +<span class="smcap">london</span></p> + +<p style="text-align: center"><i>First Published</i>, <i>at 1s. +net</i>, <i>in 1912</i></p> + +<table> + +<tr> +<td colspan="3"><p><i>This book was First Published in 1893</i></p> +</td> +</tr> + +<tr> +<td><p><i>First Published</i> (<i>Second Edition</i>) <i>by +Methuen & Co.</i></p> +</td> +<td><p><i>February</i></p> +</td> +<td><p><i>1908</i></p> +</td> +</tr> + +<tr> +<td><p><i>Third Edition</i></p> +</td> +<td><p><i>October</i></p> +</td> +<td><p><i>1909</i></p> +</td> +</tr> + +<tr> +<td><p><i>Fourth edition</i></p> +</td> +<td><p><i>October</i></p> +</td> +<td><p><i>1910</i></p> +</td> +</tr> + +<tr> +<td><p><i>Fifth Edition</i></p> +</td> +<td><p><i>May</i></p> +</td> +<td><p><i>1912</i></p> +</td> +</tr> + +</table> + +<h2>THE PERSONS OF THE PLAY</h2> + +<p>THE EARL OF CAVERSHAM, K.G.</p> + +<p>VISCOUNT GORING, his Son</p> + +<p>SIR ROBERT CHILTERN, Bart., Under-Secretary for Foreign +Affairs</p> + +<p>VICOMTE DE NANJAC, Attaché at the French Embassy in +London</p> + +<p>MR. MONTFORD</p> + +<p>MASON, Butler to Sir Robert Chiltern</p> + +<p>PHIPPS, Lord Goring’s Servant</p> + +<p>JAMES }</p> + +<p>HAROLD } Footmen</p> + +<p>LADY CHILTERN</p> + +<p>LADY MARKBY</p> + +<p>THE COUNTESS OF BASILDON</p> + +<p>MRS. MARCHMONT</p> + +<p>MISS MABEL CHILTERN, Sir Robert Chiltern’s Sister</p> + +<p>MRS. CHEVELEY</p> + +<h2>THE SCENES OF THE PLAY</h2> +<p><span class="smcap">Act</span> I. <i>The Octagon Room in +Sir Robert Chiltern’s House in Grosvenor Square</i>.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">Act</span> II. <i>Morning-room in +Sir Robert Chiltern’s House</i>.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">Act</span> III. <i>The Library of +Lord Goring’s House in Curzon Street</i>.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">Act</span> IV. <i>Same as Act +II</i>.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">Time</span>: <i>The Present</i></p> + +<p><span class="smcap">Place</span>: <i>London</i>.</p> + +<p style="text-align: center"><i>The action of the play is +completed within twenty-four hours</i>.</p> +<h2>THEATRE ROYAL, HAYMARKET</h2> +<p style="text-align: center"><i>Sole Lessee</i>: <i>Mr. Herbert +Beerbohm Tree</i></p> +<p style="text-align: center"><i>Managers</i>: <i>Mr. Lewis +Waller and Mr. H. H. Morell</i></p> +<p style="text-align: center"><i>January</i> 3<i>rd</i>, 1895</p> + +<table> +<tr> +<td><p><span class="smcap">The Earl of Caversham</span></p> +</td> +<td><p><i>Mr. Alfred Bishop</i>.</p> +</td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td><p><span class="smcap">Viscount Goring</span></p> +</td> +<td><p><i>Mr. Charles H. Hawtrey</i>.</p> +</td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td><p><span class="smcap">Sir Robert Chiltern</span></p> +</td> +<td><p><i>Mr. Lewis Waller</i>.</p> +</td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td><p><span class="smcap">Vicomte de Nanjac</span></p> +</td> +<td><p><i>Mr. Cosmo Stuart</i>.</p> +</td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td><p><span class="smcap">Mr. Montford</span></p> +</td> +<td><p><i>Mr. Harry Stanford</i>.</p> +</td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td><p><span class="smcap">Phipps</span></p> +</td> +<td><p><i>Mr. C. H. Brookfield</i>.</p> +</td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td><p><span class="smcap">Mason</span></p> +</td> +<td><p><i>Mr. H. Deane</i>.</p> +</td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td><p><span class="smcap">James</span></p> +</td> +<td><p><i>Mr. Charles Meyrick</i>.</p> +</td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td><p><span class="smcap">Harold</span></p> +</td> +<td><p><i>Mr. Goodhart</i>.</p> +</td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td><p><span class="smcap">Lady Chiltern</span></p> +</td> +<td><p><i>Miss Julia Neilson</i>.</p> +</td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td><p><span class="smcap">Lady Markby</span></p> +</td> +<td><p><i>Miss Fanny Brough</i>.</p> +</td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td><p><span class="smcap">Countess of Basildon</span></p> +</td> +<td><p><i>Miss Vane Featherston</i>.</p> +</td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td><p><span class="smcap">Mrs. Marchmont</span></p> +</td> +<td><p><i>Miss Helen Forsyth</i>.</p> +</td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td><p><span class="smcap">Miss Mabel Chiltern</span></p> +</td> +<td><p><i>Miss Maud Millet</i>.</p> +</td> +</tr> +<tr> +<td><p><span class="smcap">Mrs. Cheveley</span></p> +</td> +<td><p><i>Miss Florence West</i>.</p> +</td> +</tr> +</table> + +<h2>FIRST ACT</h2> + +<h3>SCENE</h3> + +<p><i>The octagon room at Sir Robert Chiltern’s house in +Grosvenor Square</i>.</p> + +<p>[<i>The room is brilliantly lighted and full of +guests</i>. <i>At the top of the staircase stands</i> <span +class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>, <i>a woman of grave Greek +beauty</i>, <i>about twenty-seven years of age</i>. <i>She +receives the guests as they come up</i>. <i>Over the well +of the staircase hangs a great chandelier with wax lights</i>, +<i>which illumine a large eighteenth-century French +tapestry—representing the Triumph of Love</i>, <i>from a +design by Boucher—that is stretched on the staircase +wall</i>. <i>On the right is the entrance to the +music-room</i>. <i>The sound of a string quartette is +faintly heard</i>. <i>The entrance on the left leads to +other reception-rooms</i>. <span class="smcap">mrs. +marchmont</span> <i>and</i> <span class="smcap">lady +basildon</span>, <i>two very pretty women</i>, <i>are seated +together on a Louis Seize sofa</i>. <i>They are types of +exquisite fragility</i>. <i>Their affectation of manner has +a delicate charm</i>. <i>Watteau would have loved to paint +them</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>. Going on to +the Hartlocks’ to-night, Margaret?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady basildon</span>. I suppose +so. Are you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>. Yes. +Horribly tedious parties they give, don’t they?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady basildon</span>. Horribly +tedious! Never know why I go. Never know why I go +anywhere.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>. I come here +to be educated.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady basildon</span>. Ah! I hate +being educated!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>. So do +I. It puts one almost on a level with the commercial +classes, doesn’t it? But dear Gertrude Chiltern is +always telling me that I should have some serious purpose in +life. So I come here to try to find one.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady basildon</span>. [<i>Looking +round through her lorgnette</i>.] I don’t see anybody +here to-night whom one could possibly call a serious +purpose. The man who took me in to dinner talked to me +about his wife the whole time.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>. How very +trivial of him!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady basildon</span>. Terribly +trivial! What did your man talk about?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>. About +myself.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady basildon</span>. +[<i>Languidly</i>.] And were you interested?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>. [<i>Shaking +her head</i>.] Not in the smallest degree.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady basildon</span>. What martyrs +we are, dear Margaret!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>. +[<i>Rising</i>.] And how well it becomes us, Olivia!</p> + +<p>[<i>They rise and go towards the music-room</i>. +<i>The</i> <span class="smcap">vicomte de nanjac</span>, <i>a +young attaché known for his neckties and his +Anglomania</i>, <i>approaches with a low bow</i>, <i>and enters +into conversation</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mason</span>. [<i>Announcing guests +from the top of the staircase</i>.] Mr. and Lady Jane +Barford. Lord Caversham.</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>, <i>an +old gentleman of seventy</i>, <i>wearing the riband and star of +the Garter</i>. <i>A fine Whig type</i>. <i>Rather +like a portrait by Lawrence</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Good evening, +Lady Chiltern! Has my good-for-nothing young son been +here?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. +[<i>Smiling</i>.] I don’t think Lord Goring has +arrived yet.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. [<i>Coming up +to</i> <span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>.] Why do +you call Lord Goring good-for-nothing?</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span> <i>is a perfect +example of the English type of prettiness</i>, <i>the +apple-blossom type</i>. <i>She has all the fragrance and +freedom of a flower</i>. <i>There is ripple after ripple of +sunlight in her hair</i>, <i>and the little mouth</i>, <i>with +its parted lips</i>, <i>is expectant</i>, <i>like the mouth of a +child</i>. <i>She has the fascinating tyranny of youth</i>, +<i>and the astonishing courage of innocence</i>. <i>To sane +people she is not reminiscent of any work of art</i>. +<i>But she is really like a Tanagra statuette</i>, <i>and would +be rather annoyed if she were told so</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Because he +leads such an idle life.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. How can you +say such a thing? Why, he rides in the Row at ten +o’clock in the morning, goes to the Opera three times a +week, changes his clothes at least five times a day, and dines +out every night of the season. You don’t call that +leading an idle life, do you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. [<i>Looking +at her with a kindly twinkle in his eyes</i>.] You are a +very charming young lady!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. How sweet of +you to say that, Lord Caversham! Do come to us more +often. You know we are always at home on Wednesdays, and +you look so well with your star!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Never go +anywhere now. Sick of London Society. Shouldn’t +mind being introduced to my own tailor; he always votes on the +right side. But object strongly to being sent down to +dinner with my wife’s milliner. Never could stand +Lady Caversham’s bonnets.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Oh, I love +London Society! I think it has immensely improved. It +is entirely composed now of beautiful idiots and brilliant +lunatics. Just what Society should be.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Hum! +Which is Goring? Beautiful idiot, or the other thing?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. +[<i>Gravely</i>.] I have been obliged for the present to +put Lord Goring into a class quite by himself. But he is +developing charmingly!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Into +what?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. [<i>With a +little curtsey</i>.] I hope to let you know very soon, Lord +Caversham!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mason</span>. [<i>Announcing +guests</i>.] Lady Markby. Mrs. Cheveley.</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">lady markby</span> +<i>and</i> <span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. <span +class="smcap">lady markby</span> <i>is a pleasant</i>, +<i>kindly</i>, <i>popular woman</i>, <i>with gray hair à +la marquise and good lace</i>. <span class="smcap">mrs. +cheveley</span>, <i>who accompanies her</i>, <i>is tall and +rather slight</i>. <i>Lips very thin and +highly-coloured</i>, <i>a line of scarlet on a pallid +face</i>. <i>Venetian red hair</i>, <i>aquiline nose</i>, +<i>and long throat</i>. <i>Rouge accentuates the natural +paleness of her complexion</i>. <i>Gray-green eyes that +move restlessly</i>. <i>She is in heliotrope</i>, <i>with +diamonds</i>. <i>She looks rather like an orchid</i>, +<i>and makes great demands on one’s curiosity</i>. +<i>In all her movements she is extremely graceful</i>. <i>A +work of art</i>, <i>on the whole</i>, <i>but showing the +influence of too many schools</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. Good evening, +dear Gertrude! So kind of you to let me bring my friend, +Mrs. Cheveley. Two such charming women should know each +other!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>Advances +towards</i> <span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span> <i>with a +sweet smile</i>. <i>Then suddenly stops</i>, <i>and bows +rather distantly</i>.] I think Mrs. Cheveley and I have met +before. I did not know she had married a second time.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. +[<i>Genially</i>.] Ah, nowadays people marry as often as +they can, don’t they? It is most fashionable. +[<i>To</i> <span class="smcap">duchess of +maryborough</span>.] Dear Duchess, and how is the +Duke? Brain still weak, I suppose? Well, that is only +to be expected, is it not? His good father was just the +same. There is nothing like race, is there?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>Playing +with her fan</i>.] But have we really met before, Lady +Chiltern? I can’t remember where. I have been +out of England for so long.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. We were at +school together, Mrs. Cheveley.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span> +[<i>Superciliously</i>.] Indeed? I have forgotten all +about my schooldays. I have a vague impression that they +were detestable.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. +[<i>Coldly</i>.] I am not surprised!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>In her +sweetest manner</i>.] Do you know, I am quite looking +forward to meeting your clever husband, Lady Chiltern. +Since he has been at the Foreign Office, he has been so much +talked of in Vienna. They actually succeed in spelling his +name right in the newspapers. That in itself is fame, on +the continent.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. I hardly think +there will be much in common between you and my husband, Mrs. +Cheveley! [<i>Moves away</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">vicomte de nanjac</span>. Ah! +chère Madame, quelle surprise! I have not seen you +since Berlin!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Not since +Berlin, Vicomte. Five years ago!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">vicomte de nanjac</span>. And you +are younger and more beautiful than ever. How do you manage +it?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. By making it a +rule only to talk to perfectly charming people like yourself.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">vicomte de nanjac</span>. Ah! you +flatter me. You butter me, as they say here.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Do they say +that here? How dreadful of them!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">vicomte de nanjac</span>. Yes, they +have a wonderful language. It should be more widely +known.</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span> +<i>enters</i>. <i>A man of forty</i>, <i>but looking +somewhat younger</i>. <i>Clean-shaven</i>, <i>with +finely-cut features</i>, <i>dark-haired and dark-eyed</i>. +<i>A personality of mark</i>. <i>Not popular—few +personalities are</i>. <i>But intensely admired by the +few</i>, <i>and deeply respected by the many</i>. <i>The +note of his manner is that of perfect distinction</i>, <i>with a +slight touch of pride</i>. <i>One feels that he is +conscious of the success he has made in life</i>. <i>A +nervous temperament</i>, <i>with a tired look</i>. <i>The +firmly-chiselled mouth and chin contrast strikingly with the +romantic expression in the deep-set eyes</i>. <i>The +variance is suggestive of an almost complete separation of +passion and intellect</i>, <i>as though thought and emotion were +each isolated in its own sphere through some violence of +will-power</i>. <i>There is nervousness in the +nostrils</i>, <i>and in the pale</i>, <i>thin</i>, <i>pointed +hands</i>. <i>It would be inaccurate to call him +picturesque</i>. <i>Picturesqueness cannot survive the +House of Commons</i>. <i>But Vandyck would have liked to +have painted his head</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Good +evening, Lady Markby! I hope you have brought Sir John with +you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. Oh! I have +brought a much more charming person than Sir John. Sir +John’s temper since he has taken seriously to politics has +become quite unbearable. Really, now that the House of +Commons is trying to become useful, it does a great deal of +harm.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I hope +not, Lady Markby. At any rate we do our best to waste the +public time, don’t we? But who is this charming +person you have been kind enough to bring to us?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. Her name is Mrs. +Cheveley! One of the Dorsetshire Cheveleys, I +suppose. But I really don’t know. Families are +so mixed nowadays. Indeed, as a rule, everybody turns out +to be somebody else.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Mrs. +Cheveley? I seem to know the name.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. She has just +arrived from Vienna.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Ah! +yes. I think I know whom you mean.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. Oh! she goes +everywhere there, and has such pleasant scandals about all her +friends. I really must go to Vienna next winter. I +hope there is a good chef at the Embassy.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. If there +is not, the Ambassador will certainly have to be recalled. +Pray point out Mrs. Cheveley to me. I should like to see +her.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. Let me introduce +you. [<i>To</i> <span class="smcap">mrs. +cheveley</span>.] My dear, Sir Robert Chiltern is dying to +know you!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Bowing</i>.] Every one is dying to know the brilliant +Mrs. Cheveley. Our attachés at Vienna write to us +about nothing else.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Thank you, Sir +Robert. An acquaintance that begins with a compliment is +sure to develop into a real friendship. It starts in the +right manner. And I find that I know Lady Chiltern +already.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +Really?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Yes. She +has just reminded me that we were at school together. I +remember it perfectly now. She always got the good conduct +prize. I have a distinct recollection of Lady Chiltern +always getting the good conduct prize!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Smiling</i>.] And what prizes did you get, Mrs. +Cheveley?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. My prizes came +a little later on in life. I don’t think any of them +were for good conduct. I forget!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I am +sure they were for something charming!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. I don’t +know that women are always rewarded for being charming. I +think they are usually punished for it! Certainly, more +women grow old nowadays through the faithfulness of their +admirers than through anything else! At least that is the +only way I can account for the terribly haggard look of most of +your pretty women in London!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. What an +appalling philosophy that sounds! To attempt to classify +you, Mrs. Cheveley, would be an impertinence. But may I +ask, at heart, are you an optimist or a pessimist? Those +seem to be the only two fashionable religions left to us +nowadays.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Oh, I’m +neither. Optimism begins in a broad grin, and Pessimism +ends with blue spectacles. Besides, they are both of them +merely poses.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. You +prefer to be natural?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. +Sometimes. But it is such a very difficult pose to keep +up.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. What +would those modern psychological novelists, of whom we hear so +much, say to such a theory as that?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Ah! the +strength of women comes from the fact that psychology cannot +explain us. Men can be analysed, women . . . merely +adored.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. You +think science cannot grapple with the problem of women?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Science can +never grapple with the irrational. That is why it has no +future before it, in this world.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. And +women represent the irrational.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Well-dressed +women do.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. [<i>With +a polite bow</i>.] I fear I could hardly agree with you +there. But do sit down. And now tell me, what makes +you leave your brilliant Vienna for our gloomy London—or +perhaps the question is indiscreet?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Questions are +never indiscreet. Answers sometimes are.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Well, at +any rate, may I know if it is politics or pleasure?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Politics are +my only pleasure. You see nowadays it is not fashionable to +flirt till one is forty, or to be romantic till one is +forty-five, so we poor women who are under thirty, or say we are, +have nothing open to us but politics or philanthropy. And +philanthropy seems to me to have become simply the refuge of +people who wish to annoy their fellow-creatures. I prefer +politics. I think they are more . . . becoming!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. A +political life is a noble career!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. +Sometimes. And sometimes it is a clever game, Sir +Robert. And sometimes it is a great nuisance.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Which do +you find it?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. I? A +combination of all three. [<i>Drops her fan</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Picks up fan</i>.] Allow me!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Thanks.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. But you +have not told me yet what makes you honour London so +suddenly. Our season is almost over.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Oh! I +don’t care about the London season! It is too +matrimonial. People are either hunting for husbands, or +hiding from them. I wanted to meet you. It is quite +true. You know what a woman’s curiosity is. +Almost as great as a man’s! I wanted immensely to +meet you, and . . . to ask you to do something for me.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I hope +it is not a little thing, Mrs. Cheveley. I find that little +things are so very difficult to do.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>After a +moment’s reflection</i>.] No, I don’t think it +is quite a little thing.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I am so +glad. Do tell me what it is.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Later +on. [<i>Rises</i>.] And now may I walk through your +beautiful house? I hear your pictures are charming. +Poor Baron Arnheim—you remember the Baron?—used to +tell me you had some wonderful Corots.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. [<i>With +an almost imperceptible start</i>.] Did you know Baron +Arnheim well?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. +[<i>Smiling</i>.] Intimately. Did you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. At one +time.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Wonderful man, +wasn’t he?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>After a pause</i>.] He was very remarkable, in many +ways.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. I often think +it such a pity he never wrote his memoirs. They would have +been most interesting.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Yes: he +knew men and cities well, like the old Greek.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Without the +dreadful disadvantage of having a Penelope waiting at home for +him.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mason</span>. Lord Goring.</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +<i>Thirty-four</i>, <i>but always says he is younger</i>. +<i>A well-bred</i>, <i>expressionless face</i>. <i>He is +clever</i>, <i>but would not like to be thought so</i>. +<i>A flawless dandy</i>, <i>he would be annoyed if he were +considered romantic</i>. <i>He plays with life</i>, <i>and +is on perfectly good terms with the world</i>. <i>He is +fond of being misunderstood</i>. <i>It gives him a post of +vantage</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Good +evening, my dear Arthur! Mrs. Cheveley, allow me to +introduce to you Lord Goring, the idlest man in London.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. I have met +Lord Goring before.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +[<i>Bowing</i>.] I did not think you would remember me, +Mrs. Cheveley.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. My memory is +under admirable control. And are you still a bachelor?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I . . . believe +so.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. How very +romantic!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Oh! I am not at +all romantic. I am not old enough. I leave romance to +my seniors.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Lord +Goring is the result of Boodle’s Club, Mrs. Cheveley.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. He reflects +every credit on the institution.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. May I ask are +you staying in London long?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. That depends +partly on the weather, partly on the cooking, and partly on Sir +Robert.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. You are +not going to plunge us into a European war, I hope?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. There is no +danger, at present!</p> + +<p>[<i>She nods to</i> <span class="smcap">lord goring</span>, +<i>with a look of amusement in her eyes</i>, <i>and goes out +with</i> <span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +<span class="smcap">lord goring</span> <i>saunters over to</i> +<span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. You are very +late!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Have you missed +me?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Awfully!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Then I am sorry +I did not stay away longer. I like being missed.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. How very +selfish of you!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I am very +selfish.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. You are +always telling me of your bad qualities, Lord Goring.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I have only told +you half of them as yet, Miss Mabel!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Are the +others very bad?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Quite +dreadful! When I think of them at night I go to sleep at +once.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Well, I +delight in your bad qualities. I wouldn’t have you +part with one of them.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. How very nice of +you! But then you are always nice. By the way, I want +to ask you a question, Miss Mabel. Who brought Mrs. +Cheveley here? That woman in heliotrope, who has just gone +out of the room with your brother?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Oh, I think +Lady Markby brought her. Why do you ask?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I haven’t +seen her for years, that is all.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. What an +absurd reason!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. All reasons are +absurd.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. What sort of +a woman is she?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Oh! a genius in +the daytime and a beauty at night!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. I dislike her +already.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. That shows your +admirable good taste.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">vicomte de nanjac</span>. +[<i>Approaching</i>.] Ah, the English young lady is the +dragon of good taste, is she not? Quite the dragon of good +taste.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. So the +newspapers are always telling us.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">vicomte de nanjac</span>. I read all +your English newspapers. I find them so amusing.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Then, my dear +Nanjac, you must certainly read between the lines.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">vicomte de nanjac</span>. I should +like to, but my professor objects. [<i>To</i> <span +class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>.] May I have the +pleasure of escorting you to the music-room, Mademoiselle?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. [<i>Looking +very disappointed</i>.] Delighted, Vicomte, quite +delighted! [<i>Turning to</i> <span class="smcap">lord +goring</span>.] Aren’t you coming to the +music-room?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Not if there is +any music going on, Miss Mabel.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. +[<i>Severely</i>.] The music is in German. You would +not understand it.</p> + +<p>[<i>Goes out with the</i> <span class="smcap">vicomte de +nanjac</span>. <span class="smcap">lord caversham</span> +<i>comes up to his son</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Well, sir! +what are you doing here? Wasting your life as usual! +You should be in bed, sir. You keep too late hours! I +heard of you the other night at Lady Rufford’s dancing till +four o’clock in the morning!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Only a quarter +to four, father.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Can’t +make out how you stand London Society. The thing has gone +to the dogs, a lot of damned nobodies talking about nothing.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I love talking +about nothing, father. It is the only thing I know anything +about.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. You seem to +me to be living entirely for pleasure.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. What else is +there to live for, father? Nothing ages like happiness.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. You are +heartless, sir, very heartless!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I hope not, +father. Good evening, Lady Basildon!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady basildon</span>. [<i>Arching +two pretty eyebrows</i>.] Are you here? I had no idea +you ever came to political parties!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I adore +political parties. They are the only place left to us where +people don’t talk politics.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady basildon</span>. I delight in +talking politics. I talk them all day long. But I +can’t bear listening to them. I don’t know how +the unfortunate men in the House stand these long debates.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. By never +listening.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady basildon</span>. Really?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>In his most +serious manner</i>.] Of course. You see, it is a very +dangerous thing to listen. If one listens one may be +convinced; and a man who allows himself to be convinced by an +argument is a thoroughly unreasonable person.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady basildon</span>. Ah! that +accounts for so much in men that I have never understood, and so +much in women that their husbands never appreciate in them!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>. [<i>With a +sigh</i>.] Our husbands never appreciate anything in +us. We have to go to others for that!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady basildon</span>. +[<i>Emphatically</i>.] Yes, always to others, have we +not?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +[<i>Smiling</i>.] And those are the views of the two ladies +who are known to have the most admirable husbands in London.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>. That is +exactly what we can’t stand. My Reginald is quite +hopelessly faultless. He is really unendurably so, at +times! There is not the smallest element of excitement in +knowing him.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. How +terrible! Really, the thing should be more widely +known!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady basildon</span>. Basildon is +quite as bad; he is as domestic as if he was a bachelor.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>. +[<i>Pressing</i> <span class="smcap">lady basildon’s</span> +<i>hand</i>.] My poor Olivia! We have married perfect +husbands, and we are well punished for it.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I should have +thought it was the husbands who were punished.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>. [<i>Drawing +herself up</i>.] Oh, dear no! They are as happy as +possible! And as for trusting us, it is tragic how much +they trust us.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady basildon</span>. Perfectly +tragic!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Or comic, Lady +Basildon?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady basildon</span>. Certainly not +comic, Lord Goring. How unkind of you to suggest such a +thing!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>. I am afraid +Lord Goring is in the camp of the enemy, as usual. I saw +him talking to that Mrs. Cheveley when he came in.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Handsome woman, +Mrs. Cheveley!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady basildon</span>. +[<i>Stiffly</i>.] Please don’t praise other women in +our presence. You might wait for us to do that!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I did wait.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>. Well, we are +not going to praise her. I hear she went to the Opera on +Monday night, and told Tommy Rufford at supper that, as far as +she could see, London Society was entirely made up of dowdies and +dandies.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. She is quite +right, too. The men are all dowdies and the women are all +dandies, aren’t they?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>. [<i>After a +pause</i>.] Oh! do you really think that is what Mrs. +Cheveley meant?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Of course. +And a very sensible remark for Mrs. Cheveley to make, too.</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. +<i>She joins the group</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Why are you +talking about Mrs. Cheveley? Everybody is talking about +Mrs. Cheveley! Lord Goring says—what did you say, +Lord Goring, about Mrs. Cheveley? Oh! I remember, that she +was a genius in the daytime and a beauty at night.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady basildon</span>. What a horrid +combination! So very unnatural!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>. [<i>In her +most dreamy manner</i>.] I like looking at geniuses, and +listening to beautiful people.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Ah! that is +morbid of you, Mrs. Marchmont!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>. +[<i>Brightening to a look of real pleasure</i>.] I am so +glad to hear you say that. Marchmont and I have been +married for seven years, and he has never once told me that I was +morbid. Men are so painfully unobservant!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady basildon</span>. [<i>Turning to +her</i>.] I have always said, dear Margaret, that you were +the most morbid person in London.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>. Ah! but you +are always sympathetic, Olivia!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Is it morbid +to have a desire for food? I have a great desire for +food. Lord Goring, will you give me some supper?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. With pleasure, +Miss Mabel. [<i>Moves away with her</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. How horrid +you have been! You have never talked to me the whole +evening!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. How could +I? You went away with the child-diplomatist.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. You might +have followed us. Pursuit would have been only +polite. I don’t think I like you at all this +evening!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I like you +immensely.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Well, I wish +you’d show it in a more marked way! [<i>They go +downstairs</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>. Olivia, I +have a curious feeling of absolute faintness. I think I +should like some supper very much. I know I should like +some supper.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady basildon</span>. I am +positively dying for supper, Margaret!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>. Men are so +horribly selfish, they never think of these things.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady basildon</span>. Men are +grossly material, grossly material!</p> + +<p>[<i>The</i> <span class="smcap">vicomte de nanjac</span> +<i>enters from the music-room with some other guests</i>. +<i>After having carefully examined all the people present</i>, +<i>he approaches</i> <span class="smcap">lady +basildon</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">vicomte de nanjac</span>. May I have +the honour of taking you down to supper, Comtesse?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady basildon</span>. +[<i>Coldly</i>.] I never take supper, thank you, +Vicomte. [<i>The</i> <span class="smcap">vicomte</span> +<i>is about to retire</i>. <span class="smcap">lady +basildon</span>, <i>seeing this</i>, <i>rises at once and takes +his arm</i>.] But I will come down with you with +pleasure.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">vicomte de nanjac</span>. I am so +fond of eating! I am very English in all my tastes.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady basildon</span>. You look quite +English, Vicomte, quite English.</p> + +<p>[<i>They pass out</i>. <span class="smcap">mr. +montford</span>, <i>a perfectly groomed young dandy</i>, +<i>approaches</i> <span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mr. montford</span>. Like some +supper, Mrs. Marchmont?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>. +[<i>Languidly</i>.] Thank you, Mr. Montford, I never touch +supper. [<i>Rises hastily and takes his arm</i>.] But +I will sit beside you, and watch you.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mr. montford</span>. I don’t +know that I like being watched when I am eating!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>. Then I will +watch some one else.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mr. montford</span>. I don’t +know that I should like that either.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>. +[<i>Severely</i>.] Pray, Mr. Montford, do not make these +painful scenes of jealousy in public!</p> + +<p>[<i>They go downstairs with the other guests</i>, +<i>passing</i> <span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span> +<i>and</i> <span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>, <i>who now +enter</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. And are +you going to any of our country houses before you leave England, +Mrs. Cheveley?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Oh, no! +I can’t stand your English house-parties. In England +people actually try to be brilliant at breakfast. That is +so dreadful of them! Only dull people are brilliant at +breakfast. And then the family skeleton is always reading +family prayers. My stay in England really depends on you, +Sir Robert. [<i>Sits down on the sofa</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Taking a seat beside her</i>.] Seriously?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Quite +seriously. I want to talk to you about a great political +and financial scheme, about this Argentine Canal Company, in +fact.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. What a +tedious, practical subject for you to talk about, Mrs. +Cheveley!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Oh, I like +tedious, practical subjects. What I don’t like are +tedious, practical people. There is a wide +difference. Besides, you are interested, I know, in +International Canal schemes. You were Lord Radley’s +secretary, weren’t you, when the Government bought the Suez +Canal shares?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +Yes. But the Suez Canal was a very great and splendid +undertaking. It gave us our direct route to India. It +had imperial value. It was necessary that we should have +control. This Argentine scheme is a commonplace Stock +Exchange swindle.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. A speculation, +Sir Robert! A brilliant, daring speculation.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Believe +me, Mrs. Cheveley, it is a swindle. Let us call things by +their proper names. It makes matters simpler. We have +all the information about it at the Foreign Office. In +fact, I sent out a special Commission to inquire into the matter +privately, and they report that the works are hardly begun, and +as for the money already subscribed, no one seems to know what +has become of it. The whole thing is a second Panama, and +with not a quarter of the chance of success that miserable affair +ever had. I hope you have not invested in it. I am +sure you are far too clever to have done that.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. I have +invested very largely in it.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Who +could have advised you to do such a foolish thing?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Your old +friend—and mine.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Who?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Baron +Arnheim.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Frowning</i>.] Ah! yes. I remember hearing, at +the time of his death, that he had been mixed up in the whole +affair.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. It was his +last romance. His last but one, to do him justice.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Rising</i>.] But you have not seen my Corots yet. +They are in the music-room. Corots seem to go with music, +don’t they? May I show them to you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>Shaking +her head</i>.] I am not in a mood to-night for silver +twilights, or rose-pink dawns. I want to talk +business. [<i>Motions to him with her fan to sit down again +beside her</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I fear I +have no advice to give you, Mrs. Cheveley, except to interest +yourself in something less dangerous. The success of the +Canal depends, of course, on the attitude of England, and I am +going to lay the report of the Commissioners before the House +to-morrow night.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. That you must +not do. In your own interests, Sir Robert, to say nothing +of mine, you must not do that.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Looking at her in wonder</i>.] In my own +interests? My dear Mrs. Cheveley, what do you mean? +[<i>Sits down beside her</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Sir Robert, I +will be quite frank with you. I want you to withdraw the +report that you had intended to lay before the House, on the +ground that you have reasons to believe that the Commissioners +have been prejudiced or misinformed, or something. Then I +want you to say a few words to the effect that the Government is +going to reconsider the question, and that you have reason to +believe that the Canal, if completed, will be of great +international value. You know the sort of things ministers +say in cases of this kind. A few ordinary platitudes will +do. In modern life nothing produces such an effect as a +good platitude. It makes the whole world kin. Will +you do that for me?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Mrs. +Cheveley, you cannot be serious in making me such a +proposition!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. I am quite +serious.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Coldly</i>.] Pray allow me to believe that you are +not.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>Speaking +with great deliberation and emphasis</i>.] Ah! but I +am. And if you do what I ask you, I . . . will pay you very +handsomely!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Pay +me!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Yes.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I am +afraid I don’t quite understand what you mean.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>Leaning +back on the sofa and looking at him</i>.] How very +disappointing! And I have come all the way from Vienna in +order that you should thoroughly understand me.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I fear I +don’t.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>In her +most nonchalant manner</i>.] My dear Sir Robert, you are a +man of the world, and you have your price, I suppose. +Everybody has nowadays. The drawback is that most people +are so dreadfully expensive. I know I am. I hope you +will be more reasonable in your terms.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Rises indignantly</i>.] If you will allow me, I will +call your carriage for you. You have lived so long abroad, +Mrs. Cheveley, that you seem to be unable to realise that you are +talking to an English gentleman.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>Detains +him by touching his arm with her fan</i>, <i>and keeping it there +while she is talking</i>.] I realise that I am talking to a +man who laid the foundation of his fortune by selling to a Stock +Exchange speculator a Cabinet secret.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Biting his lip</i>.] What do you mean?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>Rising and +facing him</i>.] I mean that I know the real origin of your +wealth and your career, and I have got your letter, too.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. What +letter?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. +[<i>Contemptuously</i>.] The letter you wrote to Baron +Arnheim, when you were Lord Radley’s secretary, telling the +Baron to buy Suez Canal shares—a letter written three days +before the Government announced its own purchase.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Hoarsely</i>.] It is not true.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. You thought +that letter had been destroyed. How foolish of you! +It is in my possession.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. The +affair to which you allude was no more than a speculation. +The House of Commons had not yet passed the bill; it might have +been rejected.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. It was a +swindle, Sir Robert. Let us call things by their proper +names. It makes everything simpler. And now I am +going to sell you that letter, and the price I ask for it is your +public support of the Argentine scheme. You made your own +fortune out of one canal. You must help me and my friends +to make our fortunes out of another!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. It is +infamous, what you propose—infamous!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Oh, no! +This is the game of life as we all have to play it, Sir Robert, +sooner or later!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I cannot +do what you ask me.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. You mean you +cannot help doing it. You know you are standing on the edge +of a precipice. And it is not for you to make terms. +It is for you to accept them. Supposing you +refuse—</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. What +then?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. My dear Sir +Robert, what then? You are ruined, that is all! +Remember to what a point your Puritanism in England has brought +you. In old days nobody pretended to be a bit better than +his neighbours. In fact, to be a bit better than +one’s neighbour was considered excessively vulgar and +middle-class. Nowadays, with our modern mania for morality, +every one has to pose as a paragon of purity, incorruptibility, +and all the other seven deadly virtues—and what is the +result? You all go over like ninepins—one after the +other. Not a year passes in England without somebody +disappearing. Scandals used to lend charm, or at least +interest, to a man—now they crush him. And yours is a +very nasty scandal. You couldn’t survive it. If it +were known that as a young man, secretary to a great and +important minister, you sold a Cabinet secret for a large sum of +money, and that that was the origin of your wealth and career, +you would be hounded out of public life, you would disappear +completely. And after all, Sir Robert, why should you +sacrifice your entire future rather than deal diplomatically with +your enemy? For the moment I am your enemy. I admit +it! And I am much stronger than you are. The big +battalions are on my side. You have a splendid position, +but it is your splendid position that makes you so +vulnerable. You can’t defend it! And I am in +attack. Of course I have not talked morality to you. +You must admit in fairness that I have spared you that. +Years ago you did a clever, unscrupulous thing; it turned out a +great success. You owe to it your fortune and +position. And now you have got to pay for it. Sooner +or later we have all to pay for what we do. You have to pay +now. Before I leave you to-night, you have got to promise +me to suppress your report, and to speak in the House in favour +of this scheme.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. What you +ask is impossible.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. You must make +it possible. You are going to make it possible. Sir +Robert, you know what your English newspapers are like. +Suppose that when I leave this house I drive down to some +newspaper office, and give them this scandal and the proofs of +it! Think of their loathsome joy, of the delight they would +have in dragging you down, of the mud and mire they would plunge +you in. Think of the hypocrite with his greasy smile +penning his leading article, and arranging the foulness of the +public placard.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +Stop! You want me to withdraw the report and to make a +short speech stating that I believe there are possibilities in +the scheme?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>Sitting +down on the sofa</i>.] Those are my terms.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. [<i>In a +low voice</i>.] I will give you any sum of money you +want.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Even you are +not rich enough, Sir Robert, to buy back your past. No man +is.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I will +not do what you ask me. I will not.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. You have +to. If you don’t . . . [<i>Rises from the +sofa</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Bewildered and unnerved</i>.] Wait a moment! What +did you propose? You said that you would give me back my +letter, didn’t you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Yes. +That is agreed. I will be in the Ladies’ Gallery +to-morrow night at half-past eleven. If by that +time—and you will have had heaps of opportunity—you +have made an announcement to the House in the terms I wish, I +shall hand you back your letter with the prettiest thanks, and +the best, or at any rate the most suitable, compliment I can +think of. I intend to play quite fairly with you. One +should always play fairly . . . when one has the winning +cards. The Baron taught me that . . . amongst other +things.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. You must +let me have time to consider your proposal.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. No; you must +settle now!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Give me +a week—three days!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. +Impossible! I have got to telegraph to Vienna to-night.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. My God! +what brought you into my life?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. +Circumstances. [<i>Moves towards the door</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +Don’t go. I consent. The report shall be +withdrawn. I will arrange for a question to be put to me on +the subject.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Thank +you. I knew we should come to an amicable agreement. +I understood your nature from the first. I analysed you, +though you did not adore me. And now you can get my +carriage for me, Sir Robert. I see the people coming up +from supper, and Englishmen always get romantic after a meal, and +that bores me dreadfully. [<i>Exit</i> <span +class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>.]</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter Guests</i>, <span class="smcap">lady +chiltern</span>, <span class="smcap">lady markby</span>, <span +class="smcap">lord caversham</span>, <span class="smcap">lady +basildon</span>, <span class="smcap">mrs. marchmont</span>, <span +class="smcap">vicomte de nanjac</span>, <span class="smcap">mr. +montford</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. Well, dear Mrs. +Cheveley, I hope you have enjoyed yourself. Sir Robert is +very entertaining, is he not?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Most +entertaining! I have enjoyed my talk with him +immensely.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. He has had a +very interesting and brilliant career. And he has married a +most admirable wife. Lady Chiltern is a woman of the very +highest principles, I am glad to say. I am a little too old +now, myself, to trouble about setting a good example, but I +always admire people who do. And Lady Chiltern has a very +ennobling effect on life, though her dinner-parties are rather +dull sometimes. But one can’t have everything, can +one? And now I must go, dear. Shall I call for you +to-morrow?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Thanks.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. We might drive +in the Park at five. Everything looks so fresh in the Park +now!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Except the +people!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. Perhaps the +people are a little jaded. I have often observed that the +Season as it goes on produces a kind of softening of the +brain. However, I think anything is better than high +intellectual pressure. That is the most unbecoming thing +there is. It makes the noses of the young girls so +particularly large. And there is nothing so difficult to +marry as a large nose; men don’t like them. +Good-night, dear! [<i>To</i> <span class="smcap">lady +chiltern</span>.] Good-night, Gertrude! [<i>Goes out +on</i> <span class="smcap">lord caversham’s</span> +<i>arm</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. What a +charming house you have, Lady Chiltern! I have spent a +delightful evening. It has been so interesting getting to +know your husband.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Why did you +wish to meet my husband, Mrs. Cheveley?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Oh, I will +tell you. I wanted to interest him in this Argentine Canal +scheme, of which I dare say you have heard. And I found him +most susceptible,—susceptible to reason, I mean. A +rare thing in a man. I converted him in ten minutes. +He is going to make a speech in the House to-morrow night in +favour of the idea. We must go to the Ladies’ Gallery +and hear him! It will be a great occasion!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. There must be +some mistake. That scheme could never have my +husband’s support.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Oh, I assure +you it’s all settled. I don’t regret my tedious +journey from Vienna now. It has been a great success. +But, of course, for the next twenty-four hours the whole thing is +a dead secret.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. +[<i>Gently</i>.] A secret? Between whom?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>With a +flash of amusement in her eyes</i>.] Between your husband +and myself.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Entering</i>.] Your carriage is here, Mrs. +Cheveley!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Thanks! +Good evening, Lady Chiltern! Good-night, Lord Goring! +I am at Claridge’s. Don’t you think you might +leave a card?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. If you wish it, +Mrs. Cheveley!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Oh, +don’t be so solemn about it, or I shall be obliged to leave +a card on you. In England I suppose that would hardly be +considered <i>en règle</i>. Abroad, we are more +civilised. Will you see me down, Sir Robert? Now that +we have both the same interests at heart we shall be great +friends, I hope!</p> + +<p>[<i>Sails out on</i> <span class="smcap">sir robert +chiltern’s</span> <i>arm</i>. <span +class="smcap">lady chiltern</span> <i>goes to the top of the +staircase and looks down at them as they descend</i>. +<i>Her expression is troubled</i>. <i>After a little time +she is joined by some of the guests</i>, <i>and passes with them +into another reception-room</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. What a horrid +woman!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. You should go to +bed, Miss Mabel.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Lord +Goring!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. My father told +me to go to bed an hour ago. I don’t see why I +shouldn’t give you the same advice. I always pass on +good advice. It is the only thing to do with it. It +is never of any use to oneself.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Lord Goring, +you are always ordering me out of the room. I think it most +courageous of you. Especially as I am not going to bed for +hours. [<i>Goes over to the sofa</i>.] You can come +and sit down if you like, and talk about anything in the world, +except the Royal Academy, Mrs. Cheveley, or novels in Scotch +dialect. They are not improving subjects. [<i>Catches +sight of something that is lying on the sofa half hidden by the +cushion</i>.] What is this? Some one has dropped a +diamond brooch! Quite beautiful, isn’t it? +[<i>Shows it to him</i>.] I wish it was mine, but Gertrude +won’t let me wear anything but pearls, and I am thoroughly +sick of pearls. They make one look so plain, so good and so +intellectual. I wonder whom the brooch belongs to.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I wonder who +dropped it.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. It is a +beautiful brooch.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. It is a handsome +bracelet.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. It +isn’t a bracelet. It’s a brooch.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. It can be used +as a bracelet. [<i>Takes it from her</i>, <i>and</i>, +<i>pulling out a green letter-case</i>, <i>puts the ornament +carefully in it</i>, <i>and replaces the whole thing in his +breast-pocket with the most perfect sang froid</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. What are you +doing?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Miss Mabel, I am +going to make a rather strange request to you.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. +[<i>Eagerly</i>.] Oh, pray do! I have been waiting +for it all the evening.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Is a little +taken aback</i>, <i>but recovers himself</i>.] Don’t +mention to anybody that I have taken charge of this brooch. +Should any one write and claim it, let me know at once.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. That is a +strange request.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Well, you see I +gave this brooch to somebody once, years ago.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. You did?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Yes.</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span> <i>enters +alone</i>. <i>The other guests have gone</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Then I shall +certainly bid you good-night. Good-night, Gertrude! +[<i>Exit</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Good-night, +dear! [<i>To</i> <span class="smcap">lord +goring</span>.] You saw whom Lady Markby brought here +to-night?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Yes. It +was an unpleasant surprise. What did she come here for?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Apparently to +try and lure Robert to uphold some fraudulent scheme in which she +is interested. The Argentine Canal, in fact.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. She has mistaken +her man, hasn’t she?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. She is +incapable of understanding an upright nature like my +husband’s!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Yes. I +should fancy she came to grief if she tried to get Robert into +her toils. It is extraordinary what astounding mistakes +clever women make.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. I don’t +call women of that kind clever. I call them stupid!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Same thing +often. Good-night, Lady Chiltern!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. +Good-night!</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">sir robert +chiltern</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. My dear +Arthur, you are not going? Do stop a little!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Afraid I +can’t, thanks. I have promised to look in at the +Hartlocks’. I believe they have got a mauve Hungarian +band that plays mauve Hungarian music. See you soon. +Good-bye!</p> + +<p>[<i>Exit</i>]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. How +beautiful you look to-night, Gertrude!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Robert, it is +not true, is it? You are not going to lend your support to +this Argentine speculation? You couldn’t!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Starting</i>.] Who told you I intended to do so?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. That woman who +has just gone out, Mrs. Cheveley, as she calls herself now. +She seemed to taunt me with it. Robert, I know this +woman. You don’t. We were at school +together. She was untruthful, dishonest, an evil influence +on every one whose trust or friendship she could win. I +hated, I despised her. She stole things, she was a +thief. She was sent away for being a thief. Why do +you let her influence you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +Gertrude, what you tell me may be true, but it happened many +years ago. It is best forgotten! Mrs. Cheveley may +have changed since then. No one should be entirely judged +by their past.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. +[<i>Sadly</i>.] One’s past is what one is. It +is the only way by which people should be judged.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. That is +a hard saying, Gertrude!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. It is a true +saying, Robert. And what did she mean by boasting that she +had got you to lend your support, your name, to a thing I have +heard you describe as the most dishonest and fraudulent scheme +there has ever been in political life?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Biting his lip</i>.] I was mistaken in the view I +took. We all may make mistakes.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. But you told +me yesterday that you had received the report from the +Commission, and that it entirely condemned the whole thing.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Walking up and down</i>.] I have reasons now to believe +that the Commission was prejudiced, or, at any rate, +misinformed. Besides, Gertrude, public and private life are +different things. They have different laws, and move on +different lines.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. They should +both represent man at his highest. I see no difference +between them.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Stopping</i>.] In the present case, on a matter of +practical politics, I have changed my mind. That is +all.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. All!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Sternly</i>.] Yes!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Robert! +Oh! it is horrible that I should have to ask you such a +question—Robert, are you telling me the whole truth?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Why do +you ask me such a question?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>After a +pause</i>.] Why do you not answer it?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Sitting down</i>.] Gertrude, truth is a very complex +thing, and politics is a very complex business. There are +wheels within wheels. One may be under certain obligations +to people that one must pay. Sooner or later in political +life one has to compromise. Every one does.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. +Compromise? Robert, why do you talk so differently to-night +from the way I have always heard you talk? Why are you +changed?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I am not +changed. But circumstances alter things.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Circumstances +should never alter principles!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. But if I +told you—</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. What?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. That it +was necessary, vitally necessary?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. It can never +be necessary to do what is not honourable. Or if it be +necessary, then what is it that I have loved! But it is +not, Robert; tell me it is not. Why should it be? +What gain would you get? Money? We have no need of +that! And money that comes from a tainted source is a +degradation. Power? But power is nothing in +itself. It is power to do good that is fine—that, and +that only. What is it, then? Robert, tell me why you +are going to do this dishonourable thing!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +Gertrude, you have no right to use that word. I told you it +was a question of rational compromise. It is no more than +that.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Robert, that +is all very well for other men, for men who treat life simply as +a sordid speculation; but not for you, Robert, not for you. +You are different. All your life you have stood apart from +others. You have never let the world soil you. To the +world, as to myself, you have been an ideal always. Oh! be +that ideal still. That great inheritance throw not +away—that tower of ivory do not destroy. Robert, men +can love what is beneath them—things unworthy, stained, +dishonoured. We women worship when we love; and when we +lose our worship, we lose everything. Oh! don’t kill +my love for you, don’t kill that!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +Gertrude!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. I know that +there are men with horrible secrets in their lives—men who +have done some shameful thing, and who in some critical moment +have to pay for it, by doing some other act of shame—oh! +don’t tell me you are such as they are! Robert, is +there in your life any secret dishonour or disgrace? Tell +me, tell me at once, that—</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. That +what?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>Speaking +very slowly</i>.] That our lives may drift apart.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Drift +apart?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. That they may +be entirely separate. It would be better for us both.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +Gertrude, there is nothing in my past life that you might not +know.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. I was sure of +it, Robert, I was sure of it. But why did you say those +dreadful things, things so unlike your real self? +Don’t let us ever talk about the subject again. You +will write, won’t you, to Mrs. Cheveley, and tell her that +you cannot support this scandalous scheme of hers? If you +have given her any promise you must take it back, that is +all!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Must I +write and tell her that?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Surely, +Robert! What else is there to do?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I might +see her personally. It would be better.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. You must never +see her again, Robert. She is not a woman you should ever +speak to. She is not worthy to talk to a man like +you. No; you must write to her at once, now, this moment, +and let your letter show her that your decision is quite +irrevocable!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Write +this moment!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Yes.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. But it +is so late. It is close on twelve.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. That makes no +matter. She must know at once that she has been mistaken in +you—and that you are not a man to do anything base or +underhand or dishonourable. Write here, Robert. Write +that you decline to support this scheme of hers, as you hold it +to be a dishonest scheme. Yes—write the word +dishonest. She knows what that word means. [<span +class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span> <i>sits down and writes +a letter</i>. <i>His wife takes it up and reads +it</i>.] Yes; that will do. [<i>Rings +bell</i>.] And now the envelope. [<i>He writes the +envelope slowly</i>. <i>Enter</i> <span +class="smcap">mason</span>.] Have this letter sent at once +to Claridge’s Hotel. There is no answer. +[<i>Exit</i> <span class="smcap">mason</span>. <span +class="smcap">lady chiltern</span> <i>kneels down beside her +husband</i>, <i>and puts her arms around him</i>.] Robert, +love gives one an instinct to things. I feel to-night that +I have saved you from something that might have been a danger to +you, from something that might have made men honour you less than +they do. I don’t think you realise sufficiently, +Robert, that you have brought into the political life of our time +a nobler atmosphere, a finer attitude towards life, a freer air +of purer aims and higher ideals—I know it, and for that I +love you, Robert.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Oh, love +me always, Gertrude, love me always!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. I will love +you always, because you will always be worthy of love. We +needs must love the highest when we see it! [<i>Kisses him +and rises and goes out</i>.]</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span> <i>walks up +and down for a moment</i>; <i>then sits down and buries his face +in his hands</i>. <i>The Servant enters and begins pulling +out the lights</i>. <span class="smcap">sir robert +chiltern</span> <i>looks up</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Put out +the lights, Mason, put out the lights!</p> + +<p>[<i>The Servant puts out the lights</i>. <i>The room +becomes almost dark</i>. <i>The only light there is comes +from the great chandelier that hangs over the staircase and +illumines the tapestry of the Triumph of Love</i>.]</p> +<p style="text-align: center"><span class="smcap">Act +Drop.</span></p> +<h2>SECOND ACT</h2> +<h3>SCENE</h3> +<p><i>Morning-room at Sir Robert Chiltern’s house</i>.</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">lord goring</span>, <i>dressed in the +height of fashion</i>, <i>is lounging in an armchair</i>. +<span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span> <i>is standing in +front of the fireplace</i>. <i>He is evidently in a state +of great mental excitement and distress</i>. <i>As the +scene progresses he paces nervously up and down the +room</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. My dear Robert, +it’s a very awkward business, very awkward indeed. +You should have told your wife the whole thing. Secrets +from other people’s wives are a necessary luxury in modern +life. So, at least, I am always told at the club by people +who are bald enough to know better. But no man should have +a secret from his own wife. She invariably finds it +out. Women have a wonderful instinct about things. +They can discover everything except the obvious.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Arthur, +I couldn’t tell my wife. When could I have told +her? Not last night. It would have made a life-long +separation between us, and I would have lost the love of the one +woman in the world I worship, of the only woman who has ever +stirred love within me. Last night it would have been quite +impossible. She would have turned from me in horror . . . +in horror and in contempt.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Is Lady Chiltern +as perfect as all that?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Yes; my +wife is as perfect as all that.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Taking off +his left-hand glove</i>.] What a pity! I beg your +pardon, my dear fellow, I didn’t quite mean that. But +if what you tell me is true, I should like to have a serious talk +about life with Lady Chiltern.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. It would +be quite useless.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. May I try?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Yes; but +nothing could make her alter her views.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Well, at the +worst it would simply be a psychological experiment.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. All such +experiments are terribly dangerous.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Everything is +dangerous, my dear fellow. If it wasn’t so, life +wouldn’t be worth living. . . . Well, I am bound to say +that I think you should have told her years ago.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +When? When we were engaged? Do you think she would +have married me if she had known that the origin of my fortune is +such as it is, the basis of my career such as it is, and that I +had done a thing that I suppose most men would call shameful and +dishonourable?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +[<i>Slowly</i>.] Yes; most men would call it ugly +names. There is no doubt of that.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Bitterly</i>.] Men who every day do something of the +same kind themselves. Men who, each one of them, have worse +secrets in their own lives.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. That is the +reason they are so pleased to find out other people’s +secrets. It distracts public attention from their own.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. And, +after all, whom did I wrong by what I did? No one.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Looking at +him steadily</i>.] Except yourself, Robert.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>After a pause</i>.] Of course I had private information +about a certain transaction contemplated by the Government of the +day, and I acted on it. Private information is practically +the source of every large modern fortune.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Tapping his +boot with his cane</i>.] And public scandal invariably the +result.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Pacing up and down the room</i>.] Arthur, do you think +that what I did nearly eighteen years ago should be brought up +against me now? Do you think it fair that a man’s +whole career should be ruined for a fault done in one’s +boyhood almost? I was twenty-two at the time, and I had the +double misfortune of being well-born and poor, two unforgiveable +things nowadays. Is it fair that the folly, the sin of +one’s youth, if men choose to call it a sin, should wreck a +life like mine, should place me in the pillory, should shatter +all that I have worked for, all that I have built up. Is it +fair, Arthur?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Life is never +fair, Robert. And perhaps it is a good thing for most of us +that it is not.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Every +man of ambition has to fight his century with its own +weapons. What this century worships is wealth. The +God of this century is wealth. To succeed one must have +wealth. At all costs one must have wealth.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. You underrate +yourself, Robert. Believe me, without wealth you could have +succeeded just as well.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. When I +was old, perhaps. When I had lost my passion for power, or +could not use it. When I was tired, worn out, +disappointed. I wanted my success when I was young. +Youth is the time for success. I couldn’t wait.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Well, you +certainly have had your success while you are still young. +No one in our day has had such a brilliant success. +Under-Secretary for Foreign Affairs at the age of +forty—that’s good enough for any one, I should +think.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. And if +it is all taken away from me now? If I lose everything over +a horrible scandal? If I am hounded from public life?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Robert, how +could you have sold yourself for money?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Excitedly</i>.] I did not sell myself for money. +I bought success at a great price. That is all.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +[<i>Gravely</i>.] Yes; you certainly paid a great price for +it. But what first made you think of doing such a +thing?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Baron +Arnheim.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Damned +scoundrel!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. No; he +was a man of a most subtle and refined intellect. A man of +culture, charm, and distinction. One of the most +intellectual men I ever met.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Ah! I prefer a +gentlemanly fool any day. There is more to be said for +stupidity than people imagine. Personally I have a great +admiration for stupidity. It is a sort of fellow-feeling, I +suppose. But how did he do it? Tell me the whole +thing.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Throws himself into an armchair by the +writing-table</i>.] One night after dinner at Lord +Radley’s the Baron began talking about success in modern +life as something that one could reduce to an absolutely definite +science. With that wonderfully fascinating quiet voice of +his he expounded to us the most terrible of all philosophies, the +philosophy of power, preached to us the most marvellous of all +gospels, the gospel of gold. I think he saw the effect he +had produced on me, for some days afterwards he wrote and asked +me to come and see him. He was living then in Park Lane, in +the house Lord Woolcomb has now. I remember so well how, +with a strange smile on his pale, curved lips, he led me through +his wonderful picture gallery, showed me his tapestries, his +enamels, his jewels, his carved ivories, made me wonder at the +strange loveliness of the luxury in which he lived; and then told +me that luxury was nothing but a background, a painted scene in a +play, and that power, power over other men, power over the world, +was the one thing worth having, the one supreme pleasure worth +knowing, the one joy one never tired of, and that in our century +only the rich possessed it.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>With great +deliberation</i>.] A thoroughly shallow creed.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Rising</i>.] I didn’t think so then. I +don’t think so now. Wealth has given me enormous +power. It gave me at the very outset of my life freedom, +and freedom is everything. You have never been poor, and +never known what ambition is. You cannot understand what a +wonderful chance the Baron gave me. Such a chance as few +men get.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Fortunately for +them, if one is to judge by results. But tell me +definitely, how did the Baron finally persuade you to—well, +to do what you did?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. When I +was going away he said to me that if I ever could give him any +private information of real value he would make me a very rich +man. I was dazed at the prospect he held out to me, and my +ambition and my desire for power were at that time +boundless. Six weeks later certain private documents passed +through my hands.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Keeping his +eyes steadily fixed on the carpet</i>.] State +documents?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +Yes. [<span class="smcap">lord goring</span> <i>sighs</i>, +<i>then passes his hand across his forehead and looks +up</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I had no idea +that you, of all men in the world, could have been so weak, +Robert, as to yield to such a temptation as Baron Arnheim held +out to you.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +Weak? Oh, I am sick of hearing that phrase. Sick of +using it about others. Weak? Do you really think, +Arthur, that it is weakness that yields to temptation? I +tell you that there are terrible temptations that it requires +strength, strength and courage, to yield to. To stake all +one’s life on a single moment, to risk everything on one +throw, whether the stake be power or pleasure, I care +not—there is no weakness in that. There is a +horrible, a terrible courage. I had that courage. I +sat down the same afternoon and wrote Baron Arnheim the letter +this woman now holds. He made three-quarters of a million +over the transaction.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. And you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I +received from the Baron £110,000.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. You were worth +more, Robert.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. No; that +money gave me exactly what I wanted, power over others. I +went into the House immediately. The Baron advised me in +finance from time to time. Before five years I had almost +trebled my fortune. Since then everything that I have +touched has turned out a success. In all things connected +with money I have had a luck so extraordinary that sometimes it +has made me almost afraid. I remember having read +somewhere, in some strange book, that when the gods wish to +punish us they answer our prayers.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. But tell me, +Robert, did you never suffer any regret for what you had +done?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +No. I felt that I had fought the century with its own +weapons, and won.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +[<i>Sadly</i>.] You thought you had won.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I +thought so. [<i>After a long pause</i>.] Arthur, do +you despise me for what I have told you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>With deep +feeling in his voice</i>.] I am very sorry for you, Robert, +very sorry indeed.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I +don’t say that I suffered any remorse. I +didn’t. Not remorse in the ordinary, rather silly +sense of the word. But I have paid conscience money many +times. I had a wild hope that I might disarm destiny. +The sum Baron Arnheim gave me I have distributed twice over in +public charities since then.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Looking +up</i>.] In public charities? Dear me! what a lot of +harm you must have done, Robert!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Oh, +don’t say that, Arthur; don’t talk like that!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Never mind what +I say, Robert! I am always saying what I shouldn’t +say. In fact, I usually say what I really think. A +great mistake nowadays. It makes one so liable to be +misunderstood. As regards this dreadful business, I will +help you in whatever way I can. Of course you know +that.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Thank +you, Arthur, thank you. But what is to be done? What +can be done?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Leaning back +with his hands in his pockets</i>.] Well, the English +can’t stand a man who is always saying he is in the right, +but they are very fond of a man who admits that he has been in +the wrong. It is one of the best things in them. +However, in your case, Robert, a confession would not do. +The money, if you will allow me to say so, is . . . +awkward. Besides, if you did make a clean breast of the +whole affair, you would never be able to talk morality +again. And in England a man who can’t talk morality +twice a week to a large, popular, immoral audience is quite over +as a serious politician. There would be nothing left for +him as a profession except Botany or the Church. A +confession would be of no use. It would ruin you.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. It would +ruin me. Arthur, the only thing for me to do now is to +fight the thing out.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Rising from +his chair</i>.] I was waiting for you to say that, +Robert. It is the only thing to do now. And you must +begin by telling your wife the whole story.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. That I +will not do.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Robert, believe +me, you are wrong.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I +couldn’t do it. It would kill her love for me. +And now about this woman, this Mrs. Cheveley. How can I +defend myself against her? You knew her before, Arthur, +apparently.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Yes.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Did you +know her well?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Arranging +his necktie</i>.] So little that I got engaged to be +married to her once, when I was staying at the +Tenbys’. The affair lasted for three days . . . +nearly.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Why was +it broken off?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +[<i>Airily</i>.] Oh, I forget. At least, it makes no +matter. By the way, have you tried her with money? +She used to be confoundedly fond of money.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I +offered her any sum she wanted. She refused.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Then the +marvellous gospel of gold breaks down sometimes. The rich +can’t do everything, after all.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Not +everything. I suppose you are right. Arthur, I feel +that public disgrace is in store for me. I feel certain of +it. I never knew what terror was before. I know it +now. It is as if a hand of ice were laid upon one’s +heart. It is as if one’s heart were beating itself to +death in some empty hollow.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Striking the +table</i>.] Robert, you must fight her. You must +fight her.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. But +how?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I can’t +tell you how at present. I have not the smallest +idea. But every one has some weak point. There is +some flaw in each one of us. [<i>Strolls to the fireplace +and looks at himself in the glass</i>.] My father tells me +that even I have faults. Perhaps I have. I +don’t know.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. In +defending myself against Mrs. Cheveley, I have a right to use any +weapon I can find, have I not?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Still +looking in the glass</i>.] In your place I don’t +think I should have the smallest scruple in doing so. She +is thoroughly well able to take care of herself.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. [<i>Sits +down at the table and takes a pen in his hand</i>.] Well, I +shall send a cipher telegram to the Embassy at Vienna, to inquire +if there is anything known against her. There may be some +secret scandal she might be afraid of.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Settling his +buttonhole</i>.] Oh, I should fancy Mrs. Cheveley is one of +those very modern women of our time who find a new scandal as +becoming as a new bonnet, and air them both in the Park every +afternoon at five-thirty. I am sure she adores scandals, +and that the sorrow of her life at present is that she +can’t manage to have enough of them.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Writing</i>.] Why do you say that?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Turning +round</i>.] Well, she wore far too much rouge last night, +and not quite enough clothes. That is always a sign of +despair in a woman.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Striking a bell</i>.] But it is worth while my wiring +to Vienna, is it not?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. It is always +worth while asking a question, though it is not always worth +while answering one.</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">mason</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Is Mr. +Trafford in his room?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mason</span>. Yes, Sir Robert.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. [<i>Puts +what he has written into an envelope</i>, <i>which he then +carefully closes</i>.] Tell him to have this sent off in +cipher at once. There must not be a moment’s +delay.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mason</span>. Yes, Sir Robert.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Oh! just +give that back to me again.</p> + +<p>[<i>Writes something on the envelope</i>. <span +class="smcap">mason</span> <i>then goes out with the +letter</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. She must +have had some curious hold over Baron Arnheim. I wonder +what it was.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +[<i>Smiling</i>.] I wonder.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I will +fight her to the death, as long as my wife knows nothing.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +[<i>Strongly</i>.] Oh, fight in any case—in any +case.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. [<i>With +a gesture of despair</i>.] If my wife found out, there +would be little left to fight for. Well, as soon as I hear +from Vienna, I shall let you know the result. It is a +chance, just a chance, but I believe in it. And as I fought +the age with its own weapons, I will fight her with her +weapons. It is only fair, and she looks like a woman with a +past, doesn’t she?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Most pretty +women do. But there is a fashion in pasts just as there is +a fashion in frocks. Perhaps Mrs. Cheveley’s past is +merely a slightly décolleté one, and they are +excessively popular nowadays. Besides, my dear Robert, I +should not build too high hopes on frightening Mrs. +Cheveley. I should not fancy Mrs. Cheveley is a woman who +would be easily frightened. She has survived all her +creditors, and she shows wonderful presence of mind.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Oh! I +live on hopes now. I clutch at every chance. I feel +like a man on a ship that is sinking. The water is round my +feet, and the very air is bitter with storm. Hush! I hear +my wife’s voice.</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span> <i>in +walking dress</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Good +afternoon, Lord Goring!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Good afternoon, +Lady Chiltern! Have you been in the Park?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. No; I have +just come from the Woman’s Liberal Association, where, by +the way, Robert, your name was received with loud applause, and +now I have come in to have my tea. [<i>To</i> <span +class="smcap">lord goring</span>.] You will wait and have +some tea, won’t you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I’ll wait +for a short time, thanks.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. I will be back +in a moment. I am only going to take my hat off.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>In his most +earnest manner</i>.] Oh! please don’t. It is so +pretty. One of the prettiest hats I ever saw. I hope +the Woman’s Liberal Association received it with loud +applause.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>With a +smile</i>.] We have much more important work to do than +look at each other’s bonnets, Lord Goring.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Really? +What sort of work?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Oh! dull, +useful, delightful things, Factory Acts, Female Inspectors, the +Eight Hours’ Bill, the Parliamentary Franchise. . . . +Everything, in fact, that you would find thoroughly +uninteresting.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. And never +bonnets?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>With mock +indignation</i>.] Never bonnets, never!</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span> <i>goes out through +the door leading to her boudoir</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Takes</i> <span class="smcap">lord goring’s</span> +<i>hand</i>.] You have been a good friend to me, Arthur, a +thoroughly good friend.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I don’t +know that I have been able to do much for you, Robert, as +yet. In fact, I have not been able to do anything for you, +as far as I can see. I am thoroughly disappointed with +myself.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. You have +enabled me to tell you the truth. That is something. +The truth has always stifled me.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Ah! the truth is +a thing I get rid of as soon as possible! Bad habit, by the +way. Makes one very unpopular at the club . . . with the +older members. They call it being conceited. Perhaps +it is.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I would +to God that I had been able to tell the truth . . . to live the +truth. Ah! that is the great thing in life, to live the +truth. [<i>Sighs</i>, <i>and goes towards the +door</i>.] I’ll see you soon again, Arthur, +shan’t I?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Certainly. +Whenever you like. I’m going to look in at the +Bachelors’ Ball to-night, unless I find something better to +do. But I’ll come round to-morrow morning. If +you should want me to-night by any chance, send round a note to +Curzon Street.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Thank +you.</p> + +<p>[<i>As he reaches the door</i>, <span class="smcap">lady +chiltern</span> <i>enters from her boudoir</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. You are not +going, Robert?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I have +some letters to write, dear.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>Going to +him</i>.] You work too hard, Robert. You seem never +to think of yourself, and you are looking so tired.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. It is +nothing, dear, nothing.</p> + +<p>[<i>He kisses her and goes out</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>To</i> +<span class="smcap">lord goring</span>.] Do sit down. +I am so glad you have called. I want to talk to you about . +. . well, not about bonnets, or the Woman’s Liberal +Association. You take far too much interest in the first +subject, and not nearly enough in the second.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. You want to talk +to me about Mrs. Cheveley?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Yes. You +have guessed it. After you left last night I found out that +what she had said was really true. Of course I made Robert +write her a letter at once, withdrawing his promise.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. So he gave me to +understand.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. To have kept +it would have been the first stain on a career that has been +stainless always. Robert must be above reproach. He +is not like other men. He cannot afford to do what other +men do. [<i>She looks at</i> <span class="smcap">lord +goring</span>, <i>who remains silent</i>.] Don’t you +agree with me? You are Robert’s greatest +friend. You are our greatest friend, Lord Goring. No +one, except myself, knows Robert better than you do. He has +no secrets from me, and I don’t think he has any from +you.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. He certainly has +no secrets from me. At least I don’t think so.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Then am I not +right in my estimate of him? I know I am right. But +speak to me frankly.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Looking +straight at her</i>.] Quite frankly?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Surely. +You have nothing to conceal, have you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Nothing. +But, my dear Lady Chiltern, I think, if you will allow me to say +so, that in practical life—</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. +[<i>Smiling</i>.] Of which you know so little, Lord +Goring—</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Of which I know +nothing by experience, though I know something by +observation. I think that in practical life there is +something about success, actual success, that is a little +unscrupulous, something about ambition that is unscrupulous +always. Once a man has set his heart and soul on getting to +a certain point, if he has to climb the crag, he climbs the crag; +if he has to walk in the mire—</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Well?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. He walks in the +mire. Of course I am only talking generally about life.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. +[<i>Gravely</i>.] I hope so. Why do you look at me so +strangely, Lord Goring?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Lady Chiltern, I +have sometimes thought that . . . perhaps you are a little hard +in some of your views on life. I think that . . . often you +don’t make sufficient allowances. In every nature +there are elements of weakness, or worse than weakness. +Supposing, for instance, that—that any public man, my +father, or Lord Merton, or Robert, say, had, years ago, written +some foolish letter to some one . . .</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. What do you +mean by a foolish letter?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. A letter gravely +compromising one’s position. I am only putting an +imaginary case.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Robert is as +incapable of doing a foolish thing as he is of doing a wrong +thing.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>After a long +pause</i>.] Nobody is incapable of doing a foolish +thing. Nobody is incapable of doing a wrong thing.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Are you a +Pessimist? What will the other dandies say? They will +all have to go into mourning.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +[<i>Rising</i>.] No, Lady Chiltern, I am not a +Pessimist. Indeed I am not sure that I quite know what +Pessimism really means. All I do know is that life cannot +be understood without much charity, cannot be lived without much +charity. It is love, and not German philosophy, that is the +true explanation of this world, whatever may be the explanation +of the next. And if you are ever in trouble, Lady Chiltern, +trust me absolutely, and I will help you in every way I +can. If you ever want me, come to me for my assistance, and +you shall have it. Come at once to me.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>Looking at +him in surprise</i>.] Lord Goring, you are talking quite +seriously. I don’t think I ever heard you talk +seriously before.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +[<i>Laughing</i>.] You must excuse me, Lady Chiltern. +It won’t occur again, if I can help it.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. But I like you +to be serious.</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>, <i>in +the most ravishing frock</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Dear +Gertrude, don’t say such a dreadful thing to Lord +Goring. Seriousness would be very unbecoming to him. +Good afternoon Lord Goring! Pray be as trivial as you +can.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I should like +to, Miss Mabel, but I am afraid I am . . . a little out of +practice this morning; and besides, I have to be going now.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Just when I +have come in! What dreadful manners you have! I am +sure you were very badly brought up.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I was.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. I wish I had +brought you up!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I am so sorry +you didn’t.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. It is too +late now, I suppose?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +[<i>Smiling</i>.] I am not so sure.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Will you ride +to-morrow morning?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Yes, at ten.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Don’t +forget.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Of course I +shan’t. By the way, Lady Chiltern, there is no list +of your guests in <i>The Morning Post</i> of to-day. It has +apparently been crowded out by the County Council, or the Lambeth +Conference, or something equally boring. Could you let me +have a list? I have a particular reason for asking you.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. I am sure Mr. +Trafford will be able to give you one.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Thanks, so +much.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Tommy is the +most useful person in London.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span> [<i>Turning to +her</i>.] And who is the most ornamental?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span> +[<i>Triumphantly</i>.] I am.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. How clever of +you to guess it! [<i>Takes up his hat and cane</i>.] +Good-bye, Lady Chiltern! You will remember what I said to +you, won’t you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Yes; but I +don’t know why you said it to me.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I hardly know +myself. Good-bye, Miss Mabel!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span> [<i>With a little +moue of disappointment</i>.] I wish you were not +going. I have had four wonderful adventures this morning; +four and a half, in fact. You might stop and listen to some +of them.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. How very selfish +of you to have four and a half! There won’t be any +left for me.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. I don’t +want you to have any. They would not be good for you.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. That is the +first unkind thing you have ever said to me. How charmingly +you said it! Ten to-morrow.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Sharp.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Quite +sharp. But don’t bring Mr. Trafford.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. [<i>With a +little toss of the head</i>.] Of course I shan’t +bring Tommy Trafford. Tommy Trafford is in great +disgrace.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I am delighted +to hear it. [<i>Bows and goes out</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Gertrude, I +wish you would speak to Tommy Trafford.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. What has poor +Mr. Trafford done this time? Robert says he is the best +secretary he has ever had.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Well, Tommy +has proposed to me again. Tommy really does nothing but +propose to me. He proposed to me last night in the +music-room, when I was quite unprotected, as there was an +elaborate trio going on. I didn’t dare to make the +smallest repartee, I need hardly tell you. If I had, it +would have stopped the music at once. Musical people are so +absurdly unreasonable. They always want one to be perfectly +dumb at the very moment when one is longing to be absolutely +deaf. Then he proposed to me in broad daylight this +morning, in front of that dreadful statue of Achilles. +Really, the things that go on in front of that work of art are +quite appalling. The police should interfere. At +luncheon I saw by the glare in his eye that he was going to +propose again, and I just managed to check him in time by +assuring him that I was a bimetallist. Fortunately I +don’t know what bimetallism means. And I don’t +believe anybody else does either. But the observation +crushed Tommy for ten minutes. He looked quite +shocked. And then Tommy is so annoying in the way he +proposes. If he proposed at the top of his voice, I should +not mind so much. That might produce some effect on the +public. But he does it in a horrid confidential way. +When Tommy wants to be romantic he talks to one just like a +doctor. I am very fond of Tommy, but his methods of +proposing are quite out of date. I wish, Gertrude, you +would speak to him, and tell him that once a week is quite often +enough to propose to any one, and that it should always be done +in a manner that attracts some attention.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Dear Mabel, +don’t talk like that. Besides, Robert thinks very +highly of Mr. Trafford. He believes he has a brilliant +future before him.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Oh! I +wouldn’t marry a man with a future before him for anything +under the sun.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Mabel!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. I know, +dear. You married a man with a future, didn’t +you? But then Robert was a genius, and you have a noble, +self-sacrificing character. You can stand geniuses. I +have no character at all, and Robert is the only genius I could +ever bear. As a rule, I think they are quite +impossible. Geniuses talk so much, don’t they? +Such a bad habit! And they are always thinking about +themselves, when I want them to be thinking about me. I +must go round now and rehearse at Lady Basildon’s. +You remember, we are having tableaux, don’t you? The +Triumph of something, I don’t know what! I hope it +will be triumph of me. Only triumph I am really interested +in at present. [<i>Kisses</i> <span class="smcap">lady +chiltern</span> <i>and goes out</i>; <i>then comes running +back</i>.] Oh, Gertrude, do you know who is coming to see +you? That dreadful Mrs. Cheveley, in a most lovely +gown. Did you ask her?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. +[<i>Rising</i>.] Mrs. Cheveley! Coming to see +me? Impossible!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. I assure you +she is coming upstairs, as large as life and not nearly so +natural.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. You need not +wait, Mabel. Remember, Lady Basildon is expecting you.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Oh! I must +shake hands with Lady Markby. She is delightful. I +love being scolded by her.</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">mason</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mason</span>. Lady Markby. +Mrs. Cheveley.</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">lady markby</span> +<i>and</i> <span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>Advancing +to meet them</i>.] Dear Lady Markby, how nice of you to +come and see me! [<i>Shakes hands with her</i>, <i>and bows +somewhat distantly to</i> <span class="smcap">mrs. +cheveley</span>.] Won’t you sit down, Mrs. +Cheveley?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Thanks. +Isn’t that Miss Chiltern? I should like so much to +know her.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Mabel, Mrs. +Cheveley wishes to know you.</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span> <i>gives a little +nod</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span> [<i>Sitting +down</i>.] I thought your frock so charming last night, +Miss Chiltern. So simple and . . . suitable.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Really? +I must tell my dressmaker. It will be such a surprise to +her. Good-bye, Lady Markby!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. Going +already?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. I am so sorry +but I am obliged to. I am just off to rehearsal. I +have got to stand on my head in some tableaux.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. On your head, +child? Oh! I hope not. I believe it is most +unhealthy. [<i>Takes a seat on the sofa next</i> <span +class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. But it is for +an excellent charity: in aid of the Undeserving, the only people +I am really interested in. I am the secretary, and Tommy +Trafford is treasurer.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. And what is +Lord Goring?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Oh! Lord +Goring is president.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. The post +should suit him admirably, unless he has deteriorated since I +knew him first.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. +[<i>Reflecting</i>.] You are remarkably modern, +Mabel. A little too modern, perhaps. Nothing is so +dangerous as being too modern. One is apt to grow +old-fashioned quite suddenly. I have known many instances +of it.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. What a +dreadful prospect!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. Ah! my dear, you +need not be nervous. You will always be as pretty as +possible. That is the best fashion there is, and the only +fashion that England succeeds in setting.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. [<i>With a +curtsey</i>.] Thank you so much, Lady Markby, for England . +. . and myself. [<i>Goes out</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. [<i>Turning +to</i> <span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>.] Dear +Gertrude, we just called to know if Mrs. Cheveley’s diamond +brooch has been found.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Here?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Yes. I +missed it when I got back to Claridge’s, and I thought I +might possibly have dropped it here.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. I have heard +nothing about it. But I will send for the butler and +ask. [<i>Touches the bell</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Oh, pray +don’t trouble, Lady Chiltern. I dare say I lost it at +the Opera, before we came on here.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. Ah yes, I +suppose it must have been at the Opera. The fact is, we all +scramble and jostle so much nowadays that I wonder we have +anything at all left on us at the end of an evening. I know +myself that, when I am coming back from the Drawing Room, I +always feel as if I hadn’t a shred on me, except a small +shred of decent reputation, just enough to prevent the lower +classes making painful observations through the windows of the +carriage. The fact is that our Society is terribly +over-populated. Really, some one should arrange a proper +scheme of assisted emigration. It would do a great deal of +good.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. I quite agree +with you, Lady Markby. It is nearly six years since I have +been in London for the Season, and I must say Society has become +dreadfully mixed. One sees the oddest people +everywhere.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. That is quite +true, dear. But one needn’t know them. +I’m sure I don’t know half the people who come to my +house. Indeed, from all I hear, I shouldn’t like +to.</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">mason</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. What sort of a +brooch was it that you lost, Mrs. Cheveley?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. A diamond +snake-brooch with a ruby, a rather large ruby.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. I thought you +said there was a sapphire on the head, dear?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span> +[<i>Smiling</i>.] No, lady Markby—a ruby.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. [<i>Nodding her +head</i>.] And very becoming, I am quite sure.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Has a ruby and +diamond brooch been found in any of the rooms this morning, +Mason?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mason</span>. No, my lady.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. It really is +of no consequence, Lady Chiltern. I am so sorry to have put +you to any inconvenience.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. +[<i>Coldly</i>.] Oh, it has been no inconvenience. +That will do, Mason. You can bring tea.</p> + +<p>[<i>Exit</i> <span class="smcap">mason</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. Well, I must say +it is most annoying to lose anything. I remember once at +Bath, years ago, losing in the Pump Room an exceedingly handsome +cameo bracelet that Sir John had given me. I don’t +think he has ever given me anything since, I am sorry to +say. He has sadly degenerated. Really, this horrid +House of Commons quite ruins our husbands for us. I think +the Lower House by far the greatest blow to a happy married life +that there has been since that terrible thing called the Higher +Education of Women was invented.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Ah! it is +heresy to say that in this house, Lady Markby. Robert is a +great champion of the Higher Education of Women, and so, I am +afraid, am I.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. The higher +education of men is what I should like to see. Men need it +so sadly.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. They do, +dear. But I am afraid such a scheme would be quite +unpractical. I don’t think man has much capacity for +development. He has got as far as he can, and that is not +far, is it? With regard to women, well, dear Gertrude, you +belong to the younger generation, and I am sure it is all right +if you approve of it. In my time, of course, we were taught +not to understand anything. That was the old system, and +wonderfully interesting it was. I assure you that the +amount of things I and my poor dear sister were taught not to +understand was quite extraordinary. But modern women +understand everything, I am told.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Except their +husbands. That is the one thing the modern woman never +understands.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. And a very good +thing too, dear, I dare say. It might break up many a happy +home if they did. Not yours, I need hardly say, +Gertrude. You have married a pattern husband. I wish +I could say as much for myself. But since Sir John has +taken to attending the debates regularly, which he never used to +do in the good old days, his language has become quite +impossible. He always seems to think that he is addressing +the House, and consequently whenever he discusses the state of +the agricultural labourer, or the Welsh Church, or something +quite improper of that kind, I am obliged to send all the +servants out of the room. It is not pleasant to see +one’s own butler, who has been with one for twenty-three +years, actually blushing at the side-board, and the footmen +making contortions in corners like persons in circuses. I +assure you my life will be quite ruined unless they send John at +once to the Upper House. He won’t take any interest +in politics then, will he? The House of Lords is so +sensible. An assembly of gentlemen. But in his +present state, Sir John is really a great trial. Why, this +morning before breakfast was half over, he stood up on the +hearthrug, put his hands in his pockets, and appealed to the +country at the top of his voice. I left the table as soon +as I had my second cup of tea, I need hardly say. But his +violent language could be heard all over the house! I +trust, Gertrude, that Sir Robert is not like that?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. But I am very +much interested in politics, Lady Markby. I love to hear +Robert talk about them.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. Well, I hope he +is not as devoted to Blue Books as Sir John is. I +don’t think they can be quite improving reading for any +one.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span> +[<i>Languidly</i>.] I have never read a Blue Book. I +prefer books . . . in yellow covers.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. [<i>Genially +unconscious</i>.] Yellow is a gayer colour, is it +not? I used to wear yellow a good deal in my early days, +and would do so now if Sir John was not so painfully personal in +his observations, and a man on the question of dress is always +ridiculous, is he not?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Oh, no! +I think men are the only authorities on dress.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. Really? +One wouldn’t say so from the sort of hats they wear? would +one?</p> + +<p>[<i>The butler enters</i>, <i>followed by the +footman</i>. <i>Tea is set on a small table close to</i> +<span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. May I give you +some tea, Mrs. Cheveley?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Thanks. +[<i>The butler hands</i> <span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span> +<i>a cup of tea on a salver</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Some tea, Lady +Markby?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. No thanks, +dear. [<i>The servants go out</i>.] The fact is, I +have promised to go round for ten minutes to see poor Lady +Brancaster, who is in very great trouble. Her daughter, +quite a well-brought-up girl, too, has actually become engaged to +be married to a curate in Shropshire. It is very sad, very +sad indeed. I can’t understand this modern mania for +curates. In my time we girls saw them, of course, running +about the place like rabbits. But we never took any notice +of them, I need hardly say. But I am told that nowadays +country society is quite honeycombed with them. I think it +most irreligious. And then the eldest son has quarrelled +with his father, and it is said that when they meet at the club +Lord Brancaster always hides himself behind the money article in +<i>The Times</i>. However, I believe that is quite a common +occurrence nowadays and that they have to take in extra copies of +<i>The Times</i> at all the clubs in St. James’s Street; +there are so many sons who won’t have anything to do with +their fathers, and so many fathers who won’t speak to their +sons. I think myself, it is very much to be regretted.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. So do I. +Fathers have so much to learn from their sons nowadays.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. Really, +dear? What?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. The art of +living. The only really Fine Art we have produced in modern +times.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. [<i>Shaking her +head</i>.] Ah! I am afraid Lord Brancaster knew a +good deal about that. More than his poor wife ever +did. [<i>Turning to</i> <span class="smcap">lady +chiltern</span>.] You know Lady Brancaster, don’t +you, dear?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Just +slightly. She was staying at Langton last autumn, when we +were there.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. Well, like all +stout women, she looks the very picture of happiness, as no doubt +you noticed. But there are many tragedies in her family, +besides this affair of the curate. Her own sister, Mrs. +Jekyll, had a most unhappy life; through no fault of her own, I +am sorry to say. She ultimately was so broken-hearted that +she went into a convent, or on to the operatic stage, I forget +which. No; I think it was decorative art-needlework she +took up. I know she had lost all sense of pleasure in +life. [<i>Rising</i>.] And now, Gertrude, if you will +allow me, I shall leave Mrs. Cheveley in your charge and call +back for her in a quarter of an hour. Or perhaps, dear Mrs. +Cheveley, you wouldn’t mind waiting in the carriage while I +am with Lady Brancaster. As I intend it to be a visit of +condolence, I shan’t stay long.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span> +[<i>Rising</i>.] I don’t mind waiting in the carriage +at all, provided there is somebody to look at one.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. Well, I hear the +curate is always prowling about the house.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. I am afraid I +am not fond of girl friends.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span> +[<i>Rising</i>.] Oh, I hope Mrs. Cheveley will stay here a +little. I should like to have a few minutes’ +conversation with her.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. How very kind +of you, Lady Chiltern! Believe me, nothing would give me +greater pleasure.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. Ah! no doubt you +both have many pleasant reminiscences of your schooldays to talk +over together. Good-bye, dear Gertrude! Shall I see +you at Lady Bonar’s to-night? She has discovered a +wonderful new genius. He does . . . nothing at all, I +believe. That is a great comfort, is it not?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Robert and I +are dining at home by ourselves to-night, and I don’t think +I shall go anywhere afterwards. Robert, of course, will +have to be in the House. But there is nothing interesting +on.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady markby</span>. Dining at home +by yourselves? Is that quite prudent? Ah, I forgot, +your husband is an exception. Mine is the general rule, and +nothing ages a woman so rapidly as having married the general +rule. [<i>Exit</i> <span class="smcap">lady +markby</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Wonderful +woman, Lady Markby, isn’t she? Talks more and says +less than anybody I ever met. She is made to be a public +speaker. Much more so than her husband, though he is a +typical Englishman, always dull and usually violent.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>Makes no +answer</i>, <i>but remains standing</i>. <i>There is a +pause</i>. <i>Then the eyes of the two women +meet</i>. <span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span> <i>looks +stern and pale</i>. <span class="smcap">mrs. +cheveley</span> <i>seem rather amused</i>.] Mrs. Cheveley, +I think it is right to tell you quite frankly that, had I known +who you really were, I should not have invited you to my house +last night.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span> [<i>With an +impertinent smile</i>.] Really?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. I could not +have done so.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. I see that +after all these years you have not changed a bit, Gertrude.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. I never +change.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span> [<i>Elevating her +eyebrows</i>.] Then life has taught you nothing?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. It has taught +me that a person who has once been guilty of a dishonest and +dishonourable action may be guilty of it a second time, and +should be shunned.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Would you +apply that rule to every one?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Yes, to every +one, without exception.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Then I am +sorry for you, Gertrude, very sorry for you.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. You see now, I +was sure, that for many reasons any further acquaintance between +us during your stay in London is quite impossible?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span> [<i>Leaning back in +her chair</i>.] Do you know, Gertrude, I don’t mind +your talking morality a bit. Morality is simply the +attitude we adopt towards people whom we personally +dislike. You dislike me. I am quite aware of +that. And I have always detested you. And yet I have +come here to do you a service.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. +[<i>Contemptuously</i>.] Like the service you wished to +render my husband last night, I suppose. Thank heaven, I +saved him from that.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>Starting +to her feet</i>.] It was you who made him write that +insolent letter to me? It was you who made him break his +promise?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Yes.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Then you must +make him keep it. I give you till to-morrow +morning—no more. If by that time your husband does +not solemnly bind himself to help me in this great scheme in +which I am interested—</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. This +fraudulent speculation—</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Call it what +you choose. I hold your husband in the hollow of my hand, +and if you are wise you will make him do what I tell him.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>Rising and +going towards her</i>.] You are impertinent. What has +my husband to do with you? With a woman like you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span> [<i>With a bitter +laugh</i>.] In this world like meets with like. It is +because your husband is himself fraudulent and dishonest that we +pair so well together. Between you and him there are +chasms. He and I are closer than friends. We are +enemies linked together. The same sin binds us.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. How dare you +class my husband with yourself? How dare you threaten him +or me? Leave my house. You are unfit to enter it.</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span> <i>enters from +behind</i>. <i>He hears his wife’s last words</i>, +<i>and sees to whom they are addressed</i>. <i>He grows +deadly pale</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Your +house! A house bought with the price of dishonour. A +house, everything in which has been paid for by fraud. +[<i>Turns round and sees</i> <span class="smcap">sir robert +chiltern</span>.] Ask him what the origin of his fortune +is! Get him to tell you how he sold to a stockbroker a +Cabinet secret. Learn from him to what you owe your +position.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. It is not +true! Robert! It is not true!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>Pointing +at him with outstretched finger</i>.] Look at him! +Can he deny it? Does he dare to?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +Go! Go at once. You have done your worst now.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. My +worst? I have not yet finished with you, with either of +you. I give you both till to-morrow at noon. If by +then you don’t do what I bid you to do, the whole world +shall know the origin of Robert Chiltern.</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span> <i>strikes the +bell</i>. <i>Enter</i> <span +class="smcap">mason</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Show +Mrs. Cheveley out.</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span> <i>starts</i>; +<i>then bows with somewhat exaggerated politeness to</i> <span +class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>, <i>who makes no sign of +response</i>. <i>As she passes by</i> <span +class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>, <i>who is standing +close to the door</i>, <i>she pauses for a moment and looks him +straight in the face</i>. <i>She then goes out</i>, +<i>followed by the servant</i>, <i>who closes the door after +him</i>. <i>The husband and wife are left alone</i>. +<span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span> <i>stands like some one +in a dreadful dream</i>. <i>Then she turns round and looks +at her husband</i>. <i>She looks at him with strange +eyes</i>, <i>as though she were seeing him for the first +time</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. You sold a +Cabinet secret for money! You began your life with +fraud! You built up your career on dishonour! Oh, +tell me it is not true! Lie to me! Lie to me! +Tell me it is not true!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. What +this woman said is quite true. But, Gertrude, listen to +me. You don’t realise how I was tempted. Let me +tell you the whole thing. [<i>Goes towards her</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Don’t +come near me. Don’t touch me. I feel as if you +had soiled me for ever. Oh! what a mask you have been +wearing all these years! A horrible painted mask! You +sold yourself for money. Oh! a common thief were +better. You put yourself up to sale to the highest +bidder! You were bought in the market. You lied to +the whole world. And yet you will not lie to me.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Rushing towards her</i>.] Gertrude! Gertrude!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>Thrusting +him back with outstretched hands</i>.] No, don’t +speak! Say nothing! Your voice wakes terrible +memories—memories of things that made me love +you—memories of words that made me love you—memories +that now are horrible to me. And how I worshipped +you! You were to me something apart from common life, a +thing pure, noble, honest, without stain. The world seemed +to me finer because you were in it, and goodness more real +because you lived. And now—oh, when I think that I +made of a man like you my ideal! the ideal of my life!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. There +was your mistake. There was your error. The error all +women commit. Why can’t you women love us, faults and +all? Why do you place us on monstrous pedestals? We +have all feet of clay, women as well as men; but when we men love +women, we love them knowing their weaknesses, their follies, +their imperfections, love them all the more, it may be, for that +reason. It is not the perfect, but the imperfect, who have +need of love. It is when we are wounded by our own hands, +or by the hands of others, that love should come to cure +us—else what use is love at all? All sins, except a +sin against itself, Love should forgive. All lives, save +loveless lives, true Love should pardon. A man’s love +is like that. It is wider, larger, more human than a +woman’s. Women think that they are making ideals of +men. What they are making of us are false idols +merely. You made your false idol of me, and I had not the +courage to come down, show you my wounds, tell you my +weaknesses. I was afraid that I might lose your love, as I +have lost it now. And so, last night you ruined my life for +me—yes, ruined it! What this woman asked of me was +nothing compared to what she offered to me. She offered +security, peace, stability. The sin of my youth, that I had +thought was buried, rose up in front of me, hideous, horrible, +with its hands at my throat. I could have killed it for +ever, sent it back into its tomb, destroyed its record, burned +the one witness against me. You prevented me. No one +but you, you know it. And now what is there before me but +public disgrace, ruin, terrible shame, the mockery of the world, +a lonely dishonoured life, a lonely dishonoured death, it may be, +some day? Let women make no more ideals of men! let them +not put them on altars and bow before them, or they may ruin +other lives as completely as you—you whom I have so wildly +loved—have ruined mine!</p> + +<p>[<i>He passes from the room</i>. <span +class="smcap">lady chiltern</span> <i>rushes towards him</i>, +<i>but the door is closed when she reaches it</i>. <i>Pale +with anguish</i>, <i>bewildered</i>, <i>helpless</i>, <i>she +sways like a plant in the water</i>. <i>Her hands</i>, +<i>outstretched</i>, <i>seem to tremble in the air like blossoms +in the wind</i>. <i>Then she flings herself down beside a +sofa and buries her face</i>. <i>Her sobs are like the sobs +of a child</i>.]</p> +<p style="text-align: center"><span class="smcap">Act +Drop.</span></p> +<h2>THIRD ACT</h2> +<h3>SCENE</h3> +<p><i>The Library in Lord Goring’s house</i>. <i>An +Adam room</i>. <i>On the right is the door leading into the +hall</i>. <i>On the left</i>, <i>the door of the +smoking-room</i>. <i>A pair of folding doors at the back +open into the drawing-room</i>. <i>The fire is +lit</i>. <i>Phipps</i>, <i>the butler</i>, <i>is arranging +some newspapers on the writing-table</i>. <i>The +distinction of Phipps is his impassivity</i>. <i>He has been +termed by enthusiasts the Ideal Butler</i>. <i>The Sphinx +is not so incommunicable</i>. <i>He is a mask with a +manner</i>. <i>Of his intellectual or emotional life</i>, +<i>history knows nothing</i>. <i>He represents the +dominance of form</i>.</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">lord goring</span> <i>in +evening dress with a buttonhole</i>. <i>He is wearing a +silk hat and Inverness cape</i>. <i>White-gloved</i>, <i>he +carries a Louis Seize cane</i>. <i>His are all the delicate +fopperies of Fashion</i>. <i>One sees that he stands in +immediate relation to modern life</i>, <i>makes it indeed</i>, +<i>and so masters it</i>. <i>He is the first well-dressed +philosopher in the history of thought</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Got my second +buttonhole for me, Phipps?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. Yes, my lord. +[<i>Takes his hat</i>, <i>cane</i>, <i>and cape</i>, <i>and +presents new buttonhole on salver</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Rather +distinguished thing, Phipps. I am the only person of the +smallest importance in London at present who wears a +buttonhole.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. Yes, my lord. I +have observed that.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Taking out +old buttonhole</i>.] You see, Phipps, Fashion is what one +wears oneself. What is unfashionable is what other people +wear.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. Yes, my lord.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Just as +vulgarity is simply the conduct of other people.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. Yes, my lord.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Putting in a +new buttonhole</i>.] And falsehoods the truths of other +people.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. Yes, my lord.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Other people are +quite dreadful. The only possible society is oneself.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. Yes, my lord.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. To love oneself +is the beginning of a lifelong romance, Phipps.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. Yes, my lord.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Looking at +himself in the glass</i>.] Don’t think I quite like +this buttonhole, Phipps. Makes me look a little too +old. Makes me almost in the prime of life, eh, Phipps?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. I don’t observe +any alteration in your lordship’s appearance.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. You don’t, +Phipps?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. No, my lord.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I am not quite +sure. For the future a more trivial buttonhole, Phipps, on +Thursday evenings.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. I will speak to the +florist, my lord. She has had a loss in her family lately, +which perhaps accounts for the lack of triviality your lordship +complains of in the buttonhole.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Extraordinary +thing about the lower classes in England—they are always +losing their relations.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. Yes, my lord! +They are extremely fortunate in that respect.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Turns round +and looks at him</i>. <span class="smcap">phipps</span> +<i>remains impassive</i>.] Hum! Any letters, +Phipps?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. Three, my lord. +[<i>Hands letters on a salver</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Takes +letters</i>.] Want my cab round in twenty minutes.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. Yes, my lord. +[<i>Goes towards door</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Holds up +letter in pink envelope</i>.] Ahem! Phipps, when did +this letter arrive?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. It was brought by +hand just after your lordship went to the club.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. That will +do. [<i>Exit</i> <span class="smcap">phipps</span>.] +Lady Chiltern’s handwriting on Lady Chiltern’s pink +notepaper. That is rather curious. I thought Robert +was to write. Wonder what Lady Chiltern has got to say to +me? [<i>Sits at bureau and opens letter</i>, <i>and reads +it</i>.] ‘I want you. I trust you. I am +coming to you. Gertrude.’ [<i>Puts down the +letter with a puzzled look</i>. <i>Then takes it up</i>, +<i>and reads it again slowly</i>.] ‘I want you. +I trust you. I am coming to you.’ So she has +found out everything! Poor woman! Poor woman! [ +<i>Pulls out watch and looks at it</i>.] But what an hour +to call! Ten o’clock! I shall have to give up +going to the Berkshires. However, it is always nice to be +expected, and not to arrive. I am not expected at the +Bachelors’, so I shall certainly go there. Well, I +will make her stand by her husband. That is the only thing +for her to do. That is the only thing for any woman to +do. It is the growth of the moral sense in women that makes +marriage such a hopeless, one-sided institution. Ten +o’clock. She should be here soon. I must tell +Phipps I am not in to any one else. [<i>Goes towards +bell</i>.]</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">phipps</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. Lord Caversham.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Oh, why will +parents always appear at the wrong time? Some extraordinary +mistake in nature, I suppose. [<i>Enter</i> <span +class="smcap">lord caversham</span>.] Delighted to see you, +my dear father. [<i>Goes to meet him</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Take my cloak +off.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Is it worth +while, father?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Of course it +is worth while, sir. Which is the most comfortable +chair?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. This one, +father. It is the chair I use myself, when I have +visitors.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Thank +ye. No draught, I hope, in this room?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. No, father.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. [<i>Sitting +down</i>.] Glad to hear it. Can’t stand +draughts. No draughts at home.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Good many +breezes, father.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Eh? +Eh? Don’t understand what you mean. Want to +have a serious conversation with you, sir.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. My dear +father! At this hour?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Well, sir, it +is only ten o’clock. What is your objection to the +hour? I think the hour is an admirable hour!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Well, the fact +is, father, this is not my day for talking seriously. I am +very sorry, but it is not my day.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. What do you +mean, sir?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. During the +Season, father, I only talk seriously on the first Tuesday in +every month, from four to seven.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Well, make it +Tuesday, sir, make it Tuesday.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. But it is after +seven, father, and my doctor says I must not have any serious +conversation after seven. It makes me talk in my sleep.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Talk in your +sleep, sir? What does that matter? You are not +married.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. No, father, I am +not married.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Hum! +That is what I have come to talk to you about, sir. You +have got to get married, and at once. Why, when I was your +age, sir, I had been an inconsolable widower for three months, +and was already paying my addresses to your admirable +mother. Damme, sir, it is your duty to get married. +You can’t be always living for pleasure. Every man of +position is married nowadays. Bachelors are not fashionable +any more. They are a damaged lot. Too much is known +about them. You must get a wife, sir. Look where your +friend Robert Chiltern has got to by probity, hard work, and a +sensible marriage with a good woman. Why don’t you +imitate him, sir? Why don’t you take him for your +model?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I think I shall, +father.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. I wish you +would, sir. Then I should be happy. At present I make +your mother’s life miserable on your account. You are +heartless, sir, quite heartless.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I hope not, +father.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. And it is +high time for you to get married. You are thirty-four years +of age, sir.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Yes, father, but +I only admit to thirty-two—thirty-one and a half when I +have a really good buttonhole. This buttonhole is not . . . +trivial enough.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. I tell you +you are thirty-four, sir. And there is a draught in your +room, besides, which makes your conduct worse. Why did you +tell me there was no draught, sir? I feel a draught, sir, I +feel it distinctly.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. So do I, +father. It is a dreadful draught. I will come and see +you to-morrow, father. We can talk over anything you +like. Let me help you on with your cloak, father.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. No, sir; I +have called this evening for a definite purpose, and I am going +to see it through at all costs to my health or yours. Put +down my cloak, sir.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Certainly, +father. But let us go into another room. [<i>Rings +bell</i>.] There is a dreadful draught here. +[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">phipps</span>.] Phipps, +is there a good fire in the smoking-room?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. Yes, my lord.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Come in there, +father. Your sneezes are quite heartrending.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Well, sir, I +suppose I have a right to sneeze when I choose?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +[<i>Apologetically</i>.] Quite so, father. I was +merely expressing sympathy.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Oh, damn +sympathy. There is a great deal too much of that sort of +thing going on nowadays.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I quite agree +with you, father. If there was less sympathy in the world +there would be less trouble in the world.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. [<i>Going +towards the smoking-room</i>.] That is a paradox, +sir. I hate paradoxes.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. So do I, +father. Everybody one meets is a paradox nowadays. It +is a great bore. It makes society so obvious.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. [<i>Turning +round</i>, <i>and looking at his son beneath his bushy +eyebrows</i>.] Do you always really understand what you +say, sir?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>After some +hesitation</i>.] Yes, father, if I listen attentively.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. +[<i>Indignantly</i>.] If you listen attentively! . . . +Conceited young puppy!</p> + +<p>[<i>Goes off grumbling into the smoking-room</i>. <span +class="smcap">phipps</span> <i>enters</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Phipps, there is +a lady coming to see me this evening on particular +business. Show her into the drawing-room when she +arrives. You understand?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. Yes, my lord.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. It is a matter +of the gravest importance, Phipps.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. I understand, my +lord.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. No one else is +to be admitted, under any circumstances.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. I understand, my +lord. [<i>Bell rings</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Ah! that is +probably the lady. I shall see her myself.</p> + +<p>[<i>Just as he is going towards the door</i> <span +class="smcap">lord caversham</span> <i>enters from the +smoking-room</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Well, sir? am +I to wait attendance on you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Considerably +perplexed</i>.] In a moment, father. Do excuse +me. [<span class="smcap">lord caversham</span> <i>goes +back</i>.] Well, remember my instructions, +Phipps—into that room.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. Yes, my lord.</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">lord goring</span> <i>goes into the +smoking-room</i>. <span class="smcap">harold</span>, <i>the +footman shows</i> <span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span> +<i>in</i>. <i>Lamia-like</i>, <i>she is in green and +silver</i>. <i>She has a cloak of black satin</i>, <i>lined +with dead rose-leaf silk</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">harold</span>. What name, madam?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>To</i> +<span class="smcap">phipps</span>, <i>who advances towards +her</i>.] Is Lord Goring not here? I was told he was +at home?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. His lordship is +engaged at present with Lord Caversham, madam.</p> + +<p>[<i>Turns a cold</i>, <i>glassy eye on</i> <span +class="smcap">harold</span>, <i>who at once retires</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>To +herself</i>.] How very filial!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. His lordship told me +to ask you, madam, to be kind enough to wait in the drawing-room +for him. His lordship will come to you there.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>With a +look of surprise</i>.] Lord Goring expects me?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. Yes, madam.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Are you quite +sure?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. His lordship told me +that if a lady called I was to ask her to wait in the +drawing-room. [<i>Goes to the door of the drawing-room and +opens it</i>.] His lordship’s directions on the +subject were very precise.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>To +herself</i>] How thoughtful of him! To expect the +unexpected shows a thoroughly modern intellect. [<i>Goes +towards the drawing-room and looks in</i>.] Ugh! How +dreary a bachelor’s drawing-room always looks. I +shall have to alter all this. [<span +class="smcap">phipps</span> <i>brings the lamp from the +writing-table</i>.] No, I don’t care for that +lamp. It is far too glaring. Light some candles.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. [<i>Replaces +lamp</i>.] Certainly, madam.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. I hope the +candles have very becoming shades.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. We have had no +complaints about them, madam, as yet.</p> + +<p>[<i>Passes into the drawing-room and begins to light the +candles</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>To +herself</i>.] I wonder what woman he is waiting for +to-night. It will be delightful to catch him. Men +always look so silly when they are caught. And they are +always being caught. [<i>Looks about room and approaches +the writing-table</i>.] What a very interesting room! +What a very interesting picture! Wonder what his +correspondence is like. [<i>Takes up letters</i>.] +Oh, what a very uninteresting correspondence! Bills and +cards, debts and dowagers! Who on earth writes to him on +pink paper? How silly to write on pink paper! It +looks like the beginning of a middle-class romance. Romance +should never begin with sentiment. It should begin with +science and end with a settlement. [<i>Puts letter +down</i>, <i>then takes it up again</i>.] I know that +handwriting. That is Gertrude Chiltern’s. I +remember it perfectly. The ten commandments in every stroke +of the pen, and the moral law all over the page. Wonder +what Gertrude is writing to him about? Something horrid +about me, I suppose. How I detest that woman! +[<i>Reads it</i>.] ‘I trust you. I want +you. I am coming to you. Gertrude.’ +‘I trust you. I want you. I am coming to +you.’</p> + +<p>[<i>A look of triumph comes over her face</i>. <i>She is +just about to steal the letter</i>, <i>when</i> <span +class="smcap">phipps</span> <i>comes in</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. The candles in the +drawing-room are lit, madam, as you directed.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Thank +you. [<i>Rises hastily and slips the letter under a large +silver-cased blotting-book that is lying on the table</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. I trust the shades +will be to your liking, madam. They are the most becoming +we have. They are the same as his lordship uses himself +when he is dressing for dinner.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>With a +smile</i>.] Then I am sure they will be perfectly +right.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. +[<i>Gravely</i>.] Thank you, madam.</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span> <i>goes into the +drawing-room</i>. <span class="smcap">phipps</span> +<i>closes the door and retires</i>. <i>The door is then +slowly opened</i>, <i>and</i> <span class="smcap">mrs. +cheveley</span> <i>comes out and creeps stealthily towards the +writing-table</i>. <i>Suddenly voices are heard from the +smoking-room</i>. <span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span> +<i>grows pale</i>, <i>and stops</i>. <i>The voices grow +louder</i>, <i>and she goes back into the drawing-room</i>, +<i>biting her lip</i>.]</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">lord goring</span> +<i>and</i> <span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +[<i>Expostulating</i>.] My dear father, if I am to get +married, surely you will allow me to choose the time, place, and +person? Particularly the person.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. +[<i>Testily</i>.] That is a matter for me, sir. You +would probably make a very poor choice. It is I who should +be consulted, not you. There is property at stake. It +is not a matter for affection. Affection comes later on in +married life.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Yes. In +married life affection comes when people thoroughly dislike each +other, father, doesn’t it? [<i>Puts on</i> <span +class="smcap">lord caversham’s</span> <i>cloak for +him</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Certainly, +sir. I mean certainly not, sir. You are talking very +foolishly to-night. What I say is that marriage is a matter +for common sense.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. But women who +have common sense are so curiously plain, father, aren’t +they? Of course I only speak from hearsay.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. No woman, +plain or pretty, has any common sense at all, sir. Common +sense is the privilege of our sex.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Quite so. +And we men are so self-sacrificing that we never use it, do we, +father?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. I use it, +sir. I use nothing else.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. So my mother +tells me.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. It is the +secret of your mother’s happiness. You are very +heartless, sir, very heartless.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I hope not, +father.</p> + +<p>[<i>Goes out for a moment</i>. <i>Then returns</i>, +<i>looking rather put out</i>, <i>with</i> <span +class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. My dear +Arthur, what a piece of good luck meeting you on the +doorstep! Your servant had just told me you were not at +home. How extraordinary!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. The fact is, I +am horribly busy to-night, Robert, and I gave orders I was not at +home to any one. Even my father had a comparatively cold +reception. He complained of a draught the whole time.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Ah! you +must be at home to me, Arthur. You are my best +friend. Perhaps by to-morrow you will be my only +friend. My wife has discovered everything.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Ah! I guessed as +much!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Looking at him</i>.] Really! How?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>After some +hesitation</i>.] Oh, merely by something in the expression +of your face as you came in. Who told her?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Mrs. +Cheveley herself. And the woman I love knows that I began +my career with an act of low dishonesty, that I built up my life +upon sands of shame—that I sold, like a common huckster, +the secret that had been intrusted to me as a man of +honour. I thank heaven poor Lord Radley died without +knowing that I betrayed him. I would to God I had died +before I had been so horribly tempted, or had fallen so +low. [<i>Burying his face in his hands</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>After a +pause</i>.] You have heard nothing from Vienna yet, in +answer to your wire?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Looking up</i>.] Yes; I got a telegram from the first +secretary at eight o’clock to-night.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Well?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Nothing +is absolutely known against her. On the contrary, she +occupies a rather high position in society. It is a sort of +open secret that Baron Arnheim left her the greater portion of +his immense fortune. Beyond that I can learn nothing.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. She +doesn’t turn out to be a spy, then?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Oh! +spies are of no use nowadays. Their profession is +over. The newspapers do their work instead.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. And thunderingly +well they do it.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Arthur, +I am parched with thirst. May I ring for something? +Some hock and seltzer?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Certainly. +Let me. [<i>Rings the bell</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +Thanks! I don’t know what to do, Arthur, I +don’t know what to do, and you are my only friend. +But what a friend you are—the one friend I can trust. +I can trust you absolutely, can’t I?</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">phipps</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. My dear Robert, +of course. Oh! [<i>To</i> <span +class="smcap">phipps</span>.] Bring some hock and +seltzer.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. Yes, my lord.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. And Phipps!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. Yes, my lord.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Will you excuse +me for a moment, Robert? I want to give some directions to +my servant.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +Certainly.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. When that lady +calls, tell her that I am not expected home this evening. +Tell her that I have been suddenly called out of town. You +understand?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. The lady is in that +room, my lord. You told me to show her into that room, my +lord.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. You did +perfectly right. [<i>Exit</i> <span +class="smcap">phipps</span>.] What a mess I am in. +No; I think I shall get through it. I’ll give her a +lecture through the door. Awkward thing to manage, +though.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Arthur, +tell me what I should do. My life seems to have crumbled +about me. I am a ship without a rudder in a night without a +star.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Robert, you love +your wife, don’t you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I love +her more than anything in the world. I used to think +ambition the great thing. It is not. Love is the +great thing in the world. There is nothing but love, and I +love her. But I am defamed in her eyes. I am ignoble +in her eyes. There is a wide gulf between us now. She +has found me out, Arthur, she has found me out.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Has she never in +her life done some folly—some indiscretion—that she +should not forgive your sin?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. My +wife! Never! She does not know what weakness or +temptation is. I am of clay like other men. She +stands apart as good women do—pitiless in her +perfection—cold and stern and without mercy. But I +love her, Arthur. We are childless, and I have no one else +to love, no one else to love me. Perhaps if God had sent us +children she might have been kinder to me. But God has +given us a lonely house. And she has cut my heart in +two. Don’t let us talk of it. I was brutal to +her this evening. But I suppose when sinners talk to saints +they are brutal always. I said to her things that were +hideously true, on my side, from my stand-point, from the +standpoint of men. But don’t let us talk of that.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Your wife will +forgive you. Perhaps at this moment she is forgiving +you. She loves you, Robert. Why should she not +forgive?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. God +grant it! God grant it! [<i>Buries his face in his +hands</i>.] But there is something more I have to tell you, +Arthur.</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">phipps</span> <i>with +drinks</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. [<i>Hands hock and +seltzer to</i> <span class="smcap">sir robert +chiltern</span>.] Hock and seltzer, sir.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Thank +you.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Is your carriage +here, Robert?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. No; I +walked from the club.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Sir Robert will +take my cab, Phipps.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">phipps</span>. Yes, my lord. +[<i>Exit</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Robert, you +don’t mind my sending you away?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Arthur, +you must let me stay for five minutes. I have made up my +mind what I am going to do to-night in the House. The +debate on the Argentine Canal is to begin at eleven. [<i>A +chair falls in the drawing-room</i>.] What is that?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Nothing.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I heard +a chair fall in the next room. Some one has been +listening.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. No, no; there is +no one there.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. There is +some one. There are lights in the room, and the door is +ajar. Some one has been listening to every secret of my +life. Arthur, what does this mean?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Robert, you are +excited, unnerved. I tell you there is no one in that room. +Sit down, Robert.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Do you +give me your word that there is no one there?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Yes.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Your +word of honour? [<i>Sits down</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Yes.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Rises</i>.] Arthur, let me see for myself.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. No, no.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. If there +is no one there why should I not look in that room? Arthur, +you must let me go into that room and satisfy myself. Let +me know that no eavesdropper has heard my life’s +secret. Arthur, you don’t realise what I am going +through.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Robert, this +must stop. I have told you that there is no one in that +room—that is enough.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Rushes to the door of the room</i>.] It is not +enough. I insist on going into this room. You have +told me there is no one there, so what reason can you have for +refusing me?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. For God’s +sake, don’t! There is some one there. Some one +whom you must not see.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Ah, I +thought so!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I forbid you to +enter that room.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Stand +back. My life is at stake. And I don’t care who +is there. I will know who it is to whom I have told my +secret and my shame. [<i>Enters room</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Great heavens! +his own wife!</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span> <i>comes +back</i>, <i>with a look of scorn and anger on his face</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. What +explanation have you to give me for the presence of that woman +here?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Robert, I swear +to you on my honour that that lady is stainless and guiltless of +all offence towards you.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. She is a +vile, an infamous thing!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Don’t say +that, Robert! It was for your sake she came here. It +was to try and save you she came here. She loves you and no +one else.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. You are +mad. What have I to do with her intrigues with you? +Let her remain your mistress! You are well suited to each +other. She, corrupt and shameful—you, false as a +friend, treacherous as an enemy even—</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. It is not true, +Robert. Before heaven, it is not true. In her +presence and in yours I will explain all.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Let me +pass, sir. You have lied enough upon your word of +honour.</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span> <i>goes +out</i>. <span class="smcap">lord goring</span> <i>rushes +to the door of the drawing-room</i>, <i>when</i> <span +class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span> <i>comes out</i>, <i>looking +radiant and much amused</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>With a +mock curtsey</i>] Good evening, Lord Goring!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Mrs. +Cheveley! Great heavens! . . . May I ask what you were +doing in my drawing-room?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Merely +listening. I have a perfect passion for listening through +keyholes. One always hears such wonderful things through +them.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Doesn’t +that sound rather like tempting Providence?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Oh! surely +Providence can resist temptation by this time. [<i>Makes a +sign to him to take her cloak off</i>, <i>which he does</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I am glad you +have called. I am going to give you some good advice.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Oh! pray +don’t. One should never give a woman anything that +she can’t wear in the evening.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I see you are +quite as wilful as you used to be.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Far +more! I have greatly improved. I have had more +experience.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Too much +experience is a dangerous thing. Pray have a +cigarette. Half the pretty women in London smoke +cigarettes. Personally I prefer the other half.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Thanks. +I never smoke. My dressmaker wouldn’t like it, and a +woman’s first duty in life is to her dressmaker, +isn’t it? What the second duty is, no one has as yet +discovered.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. You have come +here to sell me Robert Chiltern’s letter, haven’t +you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. To offer it to +you on conditions. How did you guess that?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Because you +haven’t mentioned the subject. Have you got it with +you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>Sitting +down</i>.] Oh, no! A well-made dress has no +pockets.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. What is your +price for it?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. How absurdly +English you are! The English think that a cheque-book can +solve every problem in life. Why, my dear Arthur, I have +very much more money than you have, and quite as much as Robert +Chiltern has got hold of. Money is not what I want.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. What do you want +then, Mrs. Cheveley?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Why +don’t you call me Laura?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I don’t +like the name.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. You used to +adore it.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Yes: +that’s why. [<span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span> +<i>motions to him to sit down beside her</i>. <i>He +smiles</i>, <i>and does so</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Arthur, you +loved me once.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Yes.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. And you asked +me to be your wife.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. That was the +natural result of my loving you.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. And you threw +me over because you saw, or said you saw, poor old Lord Mortlake +trying to have a violent flirtation with me in the conservatory +at Tenby.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I am under the +impression that my lawyer settled that matter with you on certain +terms . . . dictated by yourself.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. At that time I +was poor; you were rich.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Quite so. +That is why you pretended to love me.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>Shrugging +her shoulders</i>.] Poor old Lord Mortlake, who had only +two topics of conversation, his gout and his wife! I never +could quite make out which of the two he was talking about. +He used the most horrible language about them both. Well, +you were silly, Arthur. Why, Lord Mortlake was never +anything more to me than an amusement. One of those utterly +tedious amusements one only finds at an English country house on +an English country Sunday. I don’t think any one at +all morally responsible for what he or she does at an English +country house.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Yes. I +know lots of people think that.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. I loved you, +Arthur.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. My dear Mrs. +Cheveley, you have always been far too clever to know anything +about love.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. I did love +you. And you loved me. You know you loved me; and +love is a very wonderful thing. I suppose that when a man +has once loved a woman, he will do anything for her, except +continue to love her? [<i>Puts her hand on his</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Taking his +hand away quietly</i>.] Yes: except that.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>After a +pause</i>.] I am tired of living abroad. I want to +come back to London. I want to have a charming house +here. I want to have a salon. If one could only teach +the English how to talk, and the Irish how to listen, society +here would be quite civilised. Besides, I have arrived at +the romantic stage. When I saw you last night at the +Chilterns’, I knew you were the only person I had ever +cared for, if I ever have cared for anybody, Arthur. And +so, on the morning of the day you marry me, I will give you +Robert Chiltern’s letter. That is my offer. I +will give it to you now, if you promise to marry me.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Now?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. +[<i>Smiling</i>.] To-morrow.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Are you really +serious?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Yes, quite +serious.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I should make +you a very bad husband.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. I don’t +mind bad husbands. I have had two. They amused me +immensely.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. You mean that +you amused yourself immensely, don’t you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. What do you +know about my married life?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Nothing: but I +can read it like a book.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. What book?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +[<i>Rising</i>.] The Book of Numbers.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Do you think +it is quite charming of you to be so rude to a woman in your own +house?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. In the case of +very fascinating women, sex is a challenge, not a defence.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. I suppose that +is meant for a compliment. My dear Arthur, women are never +disarmed by compliments. Men always are. That is the +difference between the two sexes.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Women are never +disarmed by anything, as far as I know them.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>After a +pause</i>.] Then you are going to allow your greatest +friend, Robert Chiltern, to be ruined, rather than marry some one +who really has considerable attractions left. I thought you +would have risen to some great height of self-sacrifice, +Arthur. I think you should. And the rest of your life +you could spend in contemplating your own perfections.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Oh! I do that as +it is. And self-sacrifice is a thing that should be put +down by law. It is so demoralising to the people for whom +one sacrifices oneself. They always go to the bad.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. As if anything +could demoralise Robert Chiltern! You seem to forget that I +know his real character.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. What you know +about him is not his real character. It was an act of folly +done in his youth, dishonourable, I admit, shameful, I admit, +unworthy of him, I admit, and therefore . . . not his true +character.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. How you men +stand up for each other!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. How you women +war against each other!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. +[<i>Bitterly</i>.] I only war against one woman, against +Gertrude Chiltern. I hate her. I hate her now more +than ever.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Because you have +brought a real tragedy into her life, I suppose.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>With a +sneer</i>.] Oh, there is only one real tragedy in a +woman’s life. The fact that her past is always her +lover, and her future invariably her husband.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Lady Chiltern +knows nothing of the kind of life to which you are alluding.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. A woman whose +size in gloves is seven and three-quarters never knows much about +anything. You know Gertrude has always worn seven and +three-quarters? That is one of the reasons why there was +never any moral sympathy between us. . . . Well, Arthur, I +suppose this romantic interview may be regarded as at an +end. You admit it was romantic, don’t you? For +the privilege of being your wife I was ready to surrender a great +prize, the climax of my diplomatic career. You +decline. Very well. If Sir Robert doesn’t +uphold my Argentine scheme, I expose him. <i>Voilà +tout</i>.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. You +mustn’t do that. It would be vile, horrible, +infamous.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>Shrugging +her shoulders</i>.] Oh! don’t use big words. +They mean so little. It is a commercial transaction. +That is all. There is no good mixing up sentimentality in +it. I offered to sell Robert Chiltern a certain +thing. If he won’t pay me my price, he will have to +pay the world a greater price. There is no more to be +said. I must go. Good-bye. Won’t you +shake hands?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. With you? +No. Your transaction with Robert Chiltern may pass as a +loathsome commercial transaction of a loathsome commercial age; +but you seem to have forgotten that you came here to-night to +talk of love, you whose lips desecrated the word love, you to +whom the thing is a book closely sealed, went this afternoon to +the house of one of the most noble and gentle women in the world +to degrade her husband in her eyes, to try and kill her love for +him, to put poison in her heart, and bitterness in her life, to +break her idol, and, it may be, spoil her soul. That I +cannot forgive you. That was horrible. For that there +can be no forgiveness.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Arthur, you +are unjust to me. Believe me, you are quite unjust to +me. I didn’t go to taunt Gertrude at all. I had +no idea of doing anything of the kind when I entered. I +called with Lady Markby simply to ask whether an ornament, a +jewel, that I lost somewhere last night, had been found at the +Chilterns’. If you don’t believe me, you can +ask Lady Markby. She will tell you it is true. The +scene that occurred happened after Lady Markby had left, and was +really forced on me by Gertrude’s rudeness and +sneers. I called, oh!—a little out of malice if you +like—but really to ask if a diamond brooch of mine had been +found. That was the origin of the whole thing.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. A diamond +snake-brooch with a ruby?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Yes. How +do you know?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Because it is +found. In point of fact, I found it myself, and stupidly +forgot to tell the butler anything about it as I was +leaving. [<i>Goes over to the writing-table and pulls out +the drawers</i>.] It is in this drawer. No, that +one. This is the brooch, isn’t it? [<i>Holds up +the brooch</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Yes. I +am so glad to get it back. It was . . a present.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Won’t you +wear it?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Certainly, if +you pin it in. [<span class="smcap">lord goring</span> +<i>suddenly clasps it on her arm</i>.] Why do you put it on +as a bracelet? I never knew it could be worn as a +bracelet.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Really?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>Holding +out her handsome arm</i>.] No; but it looks very well on me +as a bracelet, doesn’t it?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Yes; much better +than when I saw it last.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. When did you +see it last?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +[<i>Calmly</i>.] Oh, ten years ago, on Lady Berkshire, from +whom you stole it.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. +[<i>Starting</i>.] What do you mean?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I mean that you +stole that ornament from my cousin, Mary Berkshire, to whom I +gave it when she was married. Suspicion fell on a wretched +servant, who was sent away in disgrace. I recognised it +last night. I determined to say nothing about it till I had +found the thief. I have found the thief now, and I have +heard her own confession.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>Tossing +her head</i>.] It is not true.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. You know it is +true. Why, thief is written across your face at this +moment.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. I will deny +the whole affair from beginning to end. I will say that I +have never seen this wretched thing, that it was never in my +possession.</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span> <i>tries to get the +bracelet off her arm</i>, <i>but fails</i>. <span +class="smcap">lord goring</span> <i>looks on amused</i>. +<i>Her thin fingers tear at the jewel to no purpose</i>. +<i>A curse breaks from her</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. The drawback of +stealing a thing, Mrs. Cheveley, is that one never knows how +wonderful the thing that one steals is. You can’t get +that bracelet off, unless you know where the spring is. And +I see you don’t know where the spring is. It is +rather difficult to find.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. You +brute! You coward! [<i>She tries again to unclasp the +bracelet</i>, <i>but fails</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Oh! don’t +use big words. They mean so little.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>Again +tears at the bracelet in a paroxysm of rage</i>, <i>with +inarticulate sounds</i>. <i>Then stops</i>, <i>and looks +at</i> <span class="smcap">lord goring</span>.] What are +you going to do?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I am going to +ring for my servant. He is an admirable servant. +Always comes in the moment one rings for him. When he comes +I will tell him to fetch the police.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. +[<i>Trembling</i>.] The police? What for?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. To-morrow the +Berkshires will prosecute you. That is what the police are +for.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>Is now in +an agony of physical terror</i>. <i>Her face is +distorted</i>. <i>Her mouth awry</i>. <i>A mask has +fallen from her</i>. <i>She is</i>, <i>for the moment</i>, +<i>dreadful to look at</i>.] Don’t do that. I +will do anything you want. Anything in the world you +want.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Give me Robert +Chiltern’s letter.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Stop! +Stop! Let me have time to think.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Give me Robert +Chiltern’s letter.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. I have not got +it with me. I will give it to you to-morrow.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. You know you are +lying. Give it to me at once. [<span +class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span> <i>pulls the letter out</i>, +<i>and hands it to him</i>. <i>She is horribly +pale</i>.] This is it?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>In a +hoarse voice</i>.] Yes.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Takes the +letter</i>, <i>examines it</i>, <i>sighs</i>, <i>and burns it +with the lamp</i>.] For so well-dressed a woman, Mrs. +Cheveley, you have moments of admirable common sense. I +congratulate you.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>Catches +sight of</i> <span class="smcap">lady chiltern’s</span> +<i>letter</i>, <i>the cover of which is just showing from under +the blotting-book</i>.] Please get me a glass of water.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Certainly. +[<i>Goes to the corner of the room and pours out a glass of +water</i>. <i>While his back is turned</i> <span +class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span> <i>steals</i> <span +class="smcap">lady chiltern’s</span> <i>letter</i>. +<i>When</i> <span class="smcap">lord goring</span> <i>returns the +glass she refuses it with a gesture</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Thank +you. Will you help me on with my cloak?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. With +pleasure. [<i>Puts her cloak on</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Thanks. +I am never going to try to harm Robert Chiltern again.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Fortunately you +have not the chance, Mrs. Cheveley.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Well, if even +I had the chance, I wouldn’t. On the contrary, I am +going to render him a great service.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I am charmed to +hear it. It is a reformation.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. Yes. I +can’t bear so upright a gentleman, so honourable an English +gentleman, being so shamefully deceived, and so—</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Well?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. I find that +somehow Gertrude Chiltern’s dying speech and confession has +strayed into my pocket.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. What do you +mean?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>With a +bitter note of triumph in her voice</i>.] I mean that I am +going to send Robert Chiltern the love-letter his wife wrote to +you to-night.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Love-letter?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. +[<i>Laughing</i>.] ‘I want you. I trust +you. I am coming to you. Gertrude.’</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">lord goring</span> <i>rushes to the +bureau and takes up the envelope</i>, <i>finds is empty</i>, +<i>and turns round</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. You wretched +woman, must you always be thieving? Give me back that +letter. I’ll take it from you by force. You +shall not leave my room till I have got it.</p> + +<p>[<i>He rushes towards her</i>, <i>but</i> <span +class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span> <i>at once puts her hand on +the electric bell that is on the table</i>. <i>The bell sounds +with shrill reverberations</i>, <i>and</i> <span +class="smcap">phipps</span> <i>enters</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mrs. cheveley</span>. [<i>After a +pause</i>.] Lord Goring merely rang that you should show me +out. Good-night, Lord Goring!</p> + +<p>[<i>Goes out followed by</i> <span +class="smcap">phipps</span>. <i>Her face is illumined with +evil triumph</i>. <i>There is joy in her eyes</i>. +<i>Youth seems to have come back to her</i>. <i>Her last +glance is like a swift arrow</i>. <span class="smcap">lord +goring</span> <i>bites his lip</i>, <i>and lights a +cigarette</i>.]</p> +<p style="text-align: center"><span class="smcap">Act +Drop.</span></p> +<h2>FOURTH ACT</h2> +<h3>SCENE</h3> +<p><i>Same as Act II</i>.</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">lord goring</span> <i>is standing by the +fireplace with his hands in his pockets</i>. <i>He is +looking rather bored</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Pulls out +his watch</i>, <i>inspects it</i>, <i>and rings the +bell</i>.] It is a great nuisance. I can’t find +any one in this house to talk to. And I am full of +interesting information. I feel like the latest edition of +something or other.</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter servant</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">james</span>. Sir Robert is still at +the Foreign Office, my lord.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Lady Chiltern +not down yet?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">james</span>. Her ladyship has not +yet left her room. Miss Chiltern has just come in from +riding.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>To +himself</i>.] Ah! that is something.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">james</span>. Lord Caversham has +been waiting some time in the library for Sir Robert. I +told him your lordship was here.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Thank you! +Would you kindly tell him I’ve gone?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">james</span>. [<i>Bowing</i>.] +I shall do so, my lord.</p> + +<p>[<i>Exit servant</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Really, I +don’t want to meet my father three days running. It +is a great deal too much excitement for any son. I hope to +goodness he won’t come up. Fathers should be neither +seen nor heard. That is the only proper basis for family +life. Mothers are different. Mothers are +darlings. [<i>Throws himself down into a chair</i>, +<i>picks up a paper and begins to read it</i>.]</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Well, sir, +what are you doing here? Wasting your time as usual, I +suppose?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Throws down +paper and rises</i>.] My dear father, when one pays a visit +it is for the purpose of wasting other people’s time, not +one’s own.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Have you been +thinking over what I spoke to you about last night?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I have been +thinking about nothing else.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Engaged to be +married yet?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +[<i>Genially</i>.] Not yet: but I hope to be before +lunch-time.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. +[<i>Caustically</i>.] You can have till dinner-time if it +would be of any convenience to you.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Thanks awfully, +but I think I’d sooner be engaged before lunch.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Humph! +Never know when you are serious or not.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Neither do I, +father.</p> + +<p>[<i>A pause</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. I suppose you +have read <i>The Times</i> this morning?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +[<i>Airily</i>.] The Times? Certainly not. I +only read <i>The Morning Post</i>. All that one should know +about modern life is where the Duchesses are; anything else is +quite demoralising.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Do you mean +to say you have not read <i>The Times</i> leading article on +Robert Chiltern’s career?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Good +heavens! No. What does it say?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. What should +it say, sir? Everything complimentary, of course. +Chiltern’s speech last night on this Argentine Canal scheme +was one of the finest pieces of oratory ever delivered in the +House since Canning.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Ah! Never +heard of Canning. Never wanted to. And did . . . did +Chiltern uphold the scheme?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Uphold it, +sir? How little you know him! Why, he denounced it +roundly, and the whole system of modern political finance. +This speech is the turning-point in his career, as <i>The +Times</i> points out. You should read this article, +sir. [<i>Opens</i> The Times.] ‘Sir Robert +Chiltern . . . most rising of our young statesmen . . . Brilliant +orator . . . Unblemished career . . . Well-known integrity of +character . . . Represents what is best in English public life . +. . Noble contrast to the lax morality so common among foreign +politicians.’ They will never say that of you, +sir.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I sincerely hope +not, father. However, I am delighted at what you tell me +about Robert, thoroughly delighted. It shows he has got +pluck.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. He has got +more than pluck, sir, he has got genius.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Ah! I prefer +pluck. It is not so common, nowadays, as genius is.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. I wish you +would go into Parliament.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. My dear father, +only people who look dull ever get into the House of Commons, and +only people who are dull ever succeed there.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Why +don’t you try to do something useful in life?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I am far too +young.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. +[<i>Testily</i>.] I hate this affectation of youth, +sir. It is a great deal too prevalent nowadays.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Youth +isn’t an affectation. Youth is an art.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Why +don’t you propose to that pretty Miss Chiltern?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I am of a very +nervous disposition, especially in the morning.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. I don’t +suppose there is the smallest chance of her accepting you.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I don’t +know how the betting stands to-day.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. If she did +accept you she would be the prettiest fool in England.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. That is just +what I should like to marry. A thoroughly sensible wife +would reduce me to a condition of absolute idiocy in less than +six months.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. You +don’t deserve her, sir.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. My dear father, +if we men married the women we deserved, we should have a very +bad time of it.</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Oh! . . . How +do you do, Lord Caversham? I hope Lady Caversham is quite +well?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Lady +Caversham is as usual, as usual.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Good morning, +Miss Mabel!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. [<i>Taking no +notice at all of</i> <span class="smcap">lord goring</span>, +<i>and addressing herself exclusively to</i> <span +class="smcap">lord caversham</span>.] And Lady +Caversham’s bonnets . . . are they at all better?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. They have had +a serious relapse, I am sorry to say.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Good morning, +Miss Mabel!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. [<i>To</i> +<span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>.] I hope an +operation will not be necessary.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. [<i>Smiling +at her pertness</i>.] If it is, we shall have to give Lady +Caversham a narcotic. Otherwise she would never consent to +have a feather touched.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>With +increased emphasis</i>.] Good morning, Miss Mabel!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. [<i>Turning +round with feigned surprise</i>.] Oh, are you here? +Of course you understand that after your breaking your +appointment I am never going to speak to you again.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Oh, please +don’t say such a thing. You are the one person in +London I really like to have to listen to me.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Lord Goring, +I never believe a single word that either you or I say to each +other.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. You are quite +right, my dear, quite right . . . as far as he is concerned, I +mean.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Do you think +you could possibly make your son behave a little better +occasionally? Just as a change.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. I regret to +say, Miss Chiltern, that I have no influence at all over my +son. I wish I had. If I had, I know what I would make +him do.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. I am afraid +that he has one of those terribly weak natures that are not +susceptible to influence.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. He is very +heartless, very heartless.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. It seems to me +that I am a little in the way here.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. It is very +good for you to be in the way, and to know what people say of you +behind your back.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I don’t at +all like knowing what people say of me behind my back. It +makes me far too conceited.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. After that, +my dear, I really must bid you good morning.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Oh! I hope +you are not going to leave me all alone with Lord Goring? +Especially at such an early hour in the day.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. I am afraid I +can’t take him with me to Downing Street. It is not +the Prime Minster’s day for seeing the unemployed.</p> + +<p>[<i>Shakes hands with</i> <span class="smcap">mabel +chiltern</span>, <i>takes up his hat and stick</i>, <i>and goes +out</i>, <i>with a parting glare of indignation at</i> <span +class="smcap">lord goring</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. [<i>Takes up +roses and begins to arrange them in a bowl on the +table</i>.] People who don’t keep their appointments +in the Park are horrid.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Detestable.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. I am glad you +admit it. But I wish you wouldn’t look so pleased +about it.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I can’t +help it. I always look pleased when I am with you.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. +[<i>Sadly</i>.] Then I suppose it is my duty to remain with +you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Of course it +is.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Well, my duty +is a thing I never do, on principle. It always depresses +me. So I am afraid I must leave you.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Please +don’t, Miss Mabel. I have something very particular +to say to you.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. +[<i>Rapturously</i>.] Oh! is it a proposal?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Somewhat +taken aback</i>.] Well, yes, it is—I am bound to say +it is.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. [<i>With a +sigh of pleasure</i>.] I am so glad. That makes the +second to-day.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +[<i>Indignantly</i>.] The second to-day? What +conceited ass has been impertinent enough to dare to propose to +you before I had proposed to you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Tommy +Trafford, of course. It is one of Tommy’s days for +proposing. He always proposes on Tuesdays and Thursdays, +during the Season.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. You didn’t +accept him, I hope?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. I make it a +rule never to accept Tommy. That is why he goes on +proposing. Of course, as you didn’t turn up this +morning, I very nearly said yes. It would have been an +excellent lesson both for him and for you if I had. It +would have taught you both better manners.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Oh! bother Tommy +Trafford. Tommy is a silly little ass. I love +you.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. I know. +And I think you might have mentioned it before. I am sure I +have given you heaps of opportunities.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Mabel, do be +serious. Please be serious.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Ah! that is +the sort of thing a man always says to a girl before he has been +married to her. He never says it afterwards.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Taking hold +of her hand</i>.] Mabel, I have told you that I love +you. Can’t you love me a little in return?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. You silly +Arthur! If you knew anything about . . . anything, which +you don’t, you would know that I adore you. Every one +in London knows it except you. It is a public scandal the +way I adore you. I have been going about for the last six +months telling the whole of society that I adore you. I +wonder you consent to have anything to say to me. I have no +character left at all. At least, I feel so happy that I am +quite sure I have no character left at all.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Catches her +in his arms and kisses her</i>. <i>Then there is a pause of +bliss</i>.] Dear! Do you know I was awfully afraid of +being refused!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. [<i>Looking +up at him</i>.] But you never have been refused yet by +anybody, have you, Arthur? I can’t imagine any one +refusing you.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>After +kissing her again</i>.] Of course I’m not nearly good +enough for you, Mabel.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. [<i>Nestling +close to him</i>.] I am so glad, darling. I was +afraid you were.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>After some +hesitation</i>.] And I’m . . . I’m a little +over thirty.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Dear, you +look weeks younger than that.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +[<i>Enthusiastically</i>.] How sweet of you to say so! . . +. And it is only fair to tell you frankly that I am fearfully +extravagant.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. But so am I, +Arthur. So we’re sure to agree. And now I must +go and see Gertrude.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Must you +really? [<i>Kisses her</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Yes.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Then do tell her +I want to talk to her particularly. I have been waiting +here all the morning to see either her or Robert.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Do you mean +to say you didn’t come here expressly to propose to me?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +[<i>Triumphantly</i>.] No; that was a flash of genius.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Your +first.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>With +determination</i>.] My last.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. I am +delighted to hear it. Now don’t stir. +I’ll be back in five minutes. And don’t fall +into any temptations while I am away.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Dear Mabel, +while you are away, there are none. It makes me horribly +dependent on you.</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Good morning, +dear! How pretty you are looking!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. How pale you +are looking, Gertrude! It is most becoming!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Good morning, +Lord Goring!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +[<i>Bowing</i>.] Good morning, Lady Chiltern!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. [<i>Aside +to</i> <span class="smcap">lord goring</span>.] I shall be +in the conservatory under the second palm tree on the left.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Second on the +left?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. [<i>With a +look of mock surprise</i>.] Yes; the usual palm tree.</p> + +<p>[<i>Blows a kiss to him</i>, <i>unobserved by</i> <span +class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>, <i>and goes out</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Lady Chiltern, I +have a certain amount of very good news to tell you. Mrs. +Cheveley gave me up Robert’s letter last night, and I +burned it. Robert is safe.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>Sinking on +the sofa</i>.] Safe! Oh! I am so glad of that. +What a good friend you are to him—to us!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. There is only +one person now that could be said to be in any danger.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Who is +that?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Sitting down +beside her</i>.] Yourself.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. I? In +danger? What do you mean?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Danger is too +great a word. It is a word I should not have used. +But I admit I have something to tell you that may distress you, +that terribly distresses me. Yesterday evening you wrote me +a very beautiful, womanly letter, asking me for my help. +You wrote to me as one of your oldest friends, one of your +husband’s oldest friends. Mrs. Cheveley stole that +letter from my rooms.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Well, what use +is it to her? Why should she not have it?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +[<i>Rising</i>.] Lady Chiltern, I will be quite frank with +you. Mrs. Cheveley puts a certain construction on that +letter and proposes to send it to your husband.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. But what +construction could she put on it? . . . Oh! not that! not +that! If I in—in trouble, and wanting your help, +trusting you, propose to come to you . . . that you may advise me +. . . assist me . . . Oh! are there women so horrible as that . . +.? And she proposes to send it to my husband? Tell me +what happened. Tell me all that happened.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Mrs. Cheveley +was concealed in a room adjoining my library, without my +knowledge. I thought that the person who was waiting in +that room to see me was yourself. Robert came in +unexpectedly. A chair or something fell in the room. +He forced his way in, and he discovered her. We had a +terrible scene. I still thought it was you. He left +me in anger. At the end of everything Mrs. Cheveley got +possession of your letter—she stole it, when or how, I +don’t know.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. At what hour +did this happen?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. At half-past +ten. And now I propose that we tell Robert the whole thing +at once.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>Looking at +him with amazement that is almost terror</i>.] You want me +to tell Robert that the woman you expected was not Mrs. Cheveley, +but myself? That it was I whom you thought was concealed in +a room in your house, at half-past ten o’clock at +night? You want me to tell him that?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I think it is +better that he should know the exact truth.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. +[<i>Rising</i>.] Oh, I couldn’t, I +couldn’t!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. May I do it?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. No.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. +[<i>Gravely</i>.] You are wrong, Lady Chiltern.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. No. The +letter must be intercepted. That is all. But how can +I do it? Letters arrive for him every moment of the +day. His secretaries open them and hand them to him. +I dare not ask the servants to bring me his letters. It +would be impossible. Oh! why don’t you tell me what +to do?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Pray be calm, +Lady Chiltern, and answer the questions I am going to put to +you. You said his secretaries open his letters.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Yes.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Who is with him +to-day? Mr. Trafford, isn’t it?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. No. Mr. +Montford, I think.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. You can trust +him?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>With a +gesture of despair</i>.] Oh! how do I know?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. He would do what +you asked him, wouldn’t he?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. I think +so.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Your letter was +on pink paper. He could recognise it without reading it, +couldn’t he? By the colour?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. I suppose +so.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Is he in the +house now?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Yes.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Then I will go +and see him myself, and tell him that a certain letter, written +on pink paper, is to be forwarded to Robert to-day, and that at +all costs it must not reach him. [<i>Goes to the door</i>, +<i>and opens it</i>.] Oh! Robert is coming upstairs with +the letter in his hand. It has reached him already.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>With a cry +of pain</i>.] Oh! you have saved his life; what have you +done with mine?</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">sir robert +chiltern</span>. <i>He has the letter in his hand</i>, +<i>and is reading it</i>. <i>He comes towards his wife</i>, +<i>not noticing</i> <span class="smcap">lord +goring’s</span> <i>presence</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. ‘I +want you. I trust you. I am coming to you. +Gertrude.’ Oh, my love! Is this true? Do +you indeed trust me, and want me? If so, it was for me to +come to you, not for you to write of coming to me. This +letter of yours, Gertrude, makes me feel that nothing that the +world may do can hurt me now. You want me, Gertrude?</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">lord goring</span>, <i>unseen by</i> +<span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>, <i>makes an +imploring sign to</i> <span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span> +<i>to accept the situation and</i> <span class="smcap">sir +robert’s</span> <i>error</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Yes.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. You +trust me, Gertrude?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Yes.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Ah! why +did you not add you loved me?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>Taking his +hand</i>.] Because I loved you.</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">lord goring</span> <i>passes into the +conservatory</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Kisses her</i>.] Gertrude, you don’t know what I +feel. When Montford passed me your letter across the +table—he had opened it by mistake, I suppose, without +looking at the handwriting on the envelope—and I read +it—oh! I did not care what disgrace or punishment was in +store for me, I only thought you loved me still.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. There is no +disgrace in store for you, nor any public shame. Mrs. +Cheveley has handed over to Lord Goring the document that was in +her possession, and he has destroyed it.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Are you +sure of this, Gertrude?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Yes; Lord +Goring has just told me.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Then I +am safe! Oh! what a wonderful thing to be safe! For +two days I have been in terror. I am safe now. How +did Arthur destroy my letter? Tell me.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. He burned +it.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I wish I +had seen that one sin of my youth burning to ashes. How +many men there are in modern life who would like to see their +past burning to white ashes before them! Is Arthur still +here?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Yes; he is in +the conservatory.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I am so +glad now I made that speech last night in the House, so +glad. I made it thinking that public disgrace might be the +result. But it has not been so.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Public honour +has been the result.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I think +so. I fear so, almost. For although I am safe from +detection, although every proof against me is destroyed, I +suppose, Gertrude . . . I suppose I should retire from public +life? [<i>He looks anxiously at his wife</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. +[<i>Eagerly</i>.] Oh yes, Robert, you should do that. +It is your duty to do that.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. It is +much to surrender.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. No; it will be +much to gain.</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span> <i>walks up +and down the room with a troubled expression</i>. <i>Then +comes over to his wife</i>, <i>and puts his hand on her +shoulder</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. And you +would be happy living somewhere alone with me, abroad perhaps, or +in the country away from London, away from public life? You +would have no regrets?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Oh! none, +Robert.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Sadly</i>.] And your ambition for me? You used to +be ambitious for me.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Oh, my +ambition! I have none now, but that we two may love each +other. It was your ambition that led you astray. Let +us not talk about ambition.</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">lord goring</span> <i>returns from the +conservatory</i>, <i>looking very pleased with himself</i>, +<i>and with an entirely new buttonhole that some one has made for +him</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Going towards him</i>.] Arthur, I have to thank you for +what you have done for me. I don’t know how I can +repay you. [<i>Shakes hands with him</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. My dear fellow, +I’ll tell you at once. At the present moment, under +the usual palm tree . . . I mean in the conservatory . . .</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">mason</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mason</span>. Lord Caversham.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. That admirable +father of mine really makes a habit of turning up at the wrong +moment. It is very heartless of him, very heartless +indeed.</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. +<span class="smcap">mason</span> <i>goes out</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Good morning, +Lady Chiltern! Warmest congratulations to you, Chiltern, on +your brilliant speech last night. I have just left the +Prime Minister, and you are to have the vacant seat in the +Cabinet.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. [<i>With +a look of joy and triumph</i>.] A seat in the Cabinet?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Yes; here is +the Prime Minister’s letter. [<i>Hands +letter</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Takes letter and reads it</i>.] A seat in the +Cabinet!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Certainly, +and you well deserve it too. You have got what we want so +much in political life nowadays—high character, high moral +tone, high principles. [<i>To</i> <span class="smcap">lord +goring</span>.] Everything that you have not got, sir, and +never will have.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I don’t +like principles, father. I prefer prejudices.</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span> <i>is on the +brink of accepting the Prime Minister’s offer</i>, <i>when +he sees wife looking at him with her clear</i>, <i>candid +eyes</i>. <i>He then realises that it is +impossible</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I cannot +accept this offer, Lord Caversham. I have made up my mind +to decline it.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Decline it, +sir!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. My +intention is to retire at once from public life.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. +[<i>Angrily</i>.] Decline a seat in the Cabinet, and retire +from public life? Never heard such damned nonsense in the +whole course of my existence. I beg your pardon, Lady +Chiltern. Chiltern, I beg your pardon. [<i>To</i> +<span class="smcap">lord goring</span>.] Don’t grin +like that, sir.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. No, father.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Lady +Chiltern, you are a sensible woman, the most sensible woman in +London, the most sensible woman I know. Will you kindly +prevent your husband from making such a . . . from taking such . +. . Will you kindly do that, Lady Chiltern?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. I think my +husband in right is his determination, Lord Caversham. I +approve of it.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. You approve +of it? Good heavens!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>Taking her +husband’s hand</i>.] I admire him for it. I +admire him immensely for it. I have never admired him so +much before. He is finer than even I thought him. +[<i>To</i> <span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>.] +You will go and write your letter to the Prime Minister now, +won’t you? Don’t hesitate about it, Robert.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. [<i>With +a touch of bitterness</i>.] I suppose I had better write it +at once. Such offers are not repeated. I will ask you +to excuse me for a moment, Lord Caversham.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. I may come +with you, Robert, may I not?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Yes, +Gertrude.</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span> <i>goes out with +him</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. What is the +matter with this family? Something wrong here, eh? +[<i>Tapping his forehead</i>.] Idiocy? Hereditary, I +suppose. Both of them, too. Wife as well as +husband. Very sad. Very sad indeed! And they +are not an old family. Can’t understand it.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. It is not +idiocy, father, I assure you.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. What is it +then, sir?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>After some +hesitation</i>.] Well, it is what is called nowadays a high +moral tone, father. That is all.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Hate these +new-fangled names. Same thing as we used to call idiocy +fifty years ago. Shan’t stay in this house any +longer.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Taking his +arm</i>.] Oh! just go in here for a moment, father. +Third palm tree to the left, the usual palm tree.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. What, +sir?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I beg your +pardon, father, I forgot. The conservatory, father, the +conservatory—there is some one there I want you to talk +to.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. What about, +sir?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. About me, +father.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. +[<i>Grimly</i>.] Not a subject on which much eloquence is +possible.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. No, father; but +the lady is like me. She doesn’t care much for +eloquence in others. She thinks it a little loud.</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">lord caversham</span> <i>goes out into +the conservatory</i>. <span class="smcap">lady +chiltern</span> <i>enters</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Lady Chiltern, +why are you playing Mrs. Cheveley’s cards?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. +[<i>Startled</i>.] I don’t understand you.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Mrs. Cheveley +made an attempt to ruin your husband. Either to drive him +from public life, or to make him adopt a dishonourable +position. From the latter tragedy you saved him. The +former you are now thrusting on him. Why should you do him +the wrong Mrs. Cheveley tried to do and failed?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Lord +Goring?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>Pulling +himself together for a great effort</i>, <i>and showing the +philosopher that underlies the dandy</i>.] Lady Chiltern, +allow me. You wrote me a letter last night in which you +said you trusted me and wanted my help. Now is the moment +when you really want my help, now is the time when you have got +to trust me, to trust in my counsel and judgment. You love +Robert. Do you want to kill his love for you? What +sort of existence will he have if you rob him of the fruits of +his ambition, if you take him from the splendour of a great +political career, if you close the doors of public life against +him, if you condemn him to sterile failure, he who was made for +triumph and success? Women are not meant to judge us, but +to forgive us when we need forgiveness. Pardon, not +punishment, is their mission. Why should you scourge him +with rods for a sin done in his youth, before he knew you, before +he knew himself? A man’s life is of more value than a +woman’s. It has larger issues, wider scope, greater +ambitions. A woman’s life revolves in curves of +emotions. It is upon lines of intellect that a man’s +life progresses. Don’t make any terrible mistake, +Lady Chiltern. A woman who can keep a man’s love, and +love him in return, has done all the world wants of women, or +should want of them.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>Troubled +and hesitating</i>.] But it is my husband himself who +wishes to retire from public life. He feels it is his +duty. It was he who first said so.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Rather than lose +your love, Robert would do anything, wreck his whole career, as +he is on the brink of doing now. He is making for you a +terrible sacrifice. Take my advice, Lady Chiltern, and do +not accept a sacrifice so great. If you do, you will live +to repent it bitterly. We men and women are not made to +accept such sacrifices from each other. We are not worthy +of them. Besides, Robert has been punished enough.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. We have both +been punished. I set him up too high.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. [<i>With deep +feeling in his voice</i>.] Do not for that reason set him +down now too low. If he has fallen from his altar, do not +thrust him into the mire. Failure to Robert would be the +very mire of shame. Power is his passion. He would +lose everything, even his power to feel love. Your +husband’s life is at this moment in your hands, your +husband’s love is in your hands. Don’t mar both +for him.</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">sir robert +chiltern</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +Gertrude, here is the draft of my letter. Shall I read it +to you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Let me see +it.</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">sir robert</span> <i>hands her the +letter</i>. <i>She reads it</i>, <i>and then</i>, <i>with a +gesture of passion</i>, <i>tears it up</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. What are +you doing?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. A man’s +life is of more value than a woman’s. It has larger +issues, wider scope, greater ambitions. Our lives revolve +in curves of emotions. It is upon lines of intellect that a +man’s life progresses. I have just learnt this, and +much else with it, from Lord Goring. And I will not spoil +your life for you, nor see you spoil it as a sacrifice to me, a +useless sacrifice!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +Gertrude! Gertrude!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. You can +forget. Men easily forget. And I forgive. That +is how women help the world. I see that now.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Deeply overcome by emotion</i>, <i>embraces her</i>.] +My wife! my wife! [<i>To</i> <span class="smcap">lord +goring</span>.] Arthur, it seems that I am always to be in +your debt.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Oh dear no, +Robert. Your debt is to Lady Chiltern, not to me!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. I owe +you much. And now tell me what you were going to ask me +just now as Lord Caversham came in.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Robert, you are +your sister’s guardian, and I want your consent to my +marriage with her. That is all.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Oh, I am so +glad! I am so glad! [<i>Shakes hands with</i> <span +class="smcap">lord goring</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Thank you, Lady +Chiltern.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. [<i>With +a troubled look</i>.] My sister to be your wife?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Yes.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Speaking with great firmness</i>.] Arthur, I am very +sorry, but the thing is quite out of the question. I have +to think of Mabel’s future happiness. And I +don’t think her happiness would be safe in your +hands. And I cannot have her sacrificed!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Sacrificed!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Yes, +utterly sacrificed. Loveless marriages are horrible. +But there is one thing worse than an absolutely loveless +marriage. A marriage in which there is love, but on one +side only; faith, but on one side only; devotion, but on one side +only, and in which of the two hearts one is sure to be +broken.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. But I love +Mabel. No other woman has any place in my life.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Robert, if +they love each other, why should they not be married?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Arthur +cannot bring Mabel the love that she deserves.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. What reason have +you for saying that?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>After a pause</i>.] Do you really require me to tell +you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Certainly I +do.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. As you +choose. When I called on you yesterday evening I found Mrs. +Cheveley concealed in your rooms. It was between ten and +eleven o’clock at night. I do not wish to say +anything more. Your relations with Mrs. Cheveley have, as I +said to you last night, nothing whatsoever to do with me. I +know you were engaged to be married to her once. The +fascination she exercised over you then seems to have +returned. You spoke to me last night of her as of a woman +pure and stainless, a woman whom you respected and +honoured. That may be so. But I cannot give my +sister’s life into your hands. It would be wrong of +me. It would be unjust, infamously unjust to her.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. I have nothing +more to say.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Robert, it was +not Mrs. Cheveley whom Lord Goring expected last night.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. Not Mrs. +Cheveley! Who was it then?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Lady +Chiltern!</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. It was your +own wife. Robert, yesterday afternoon Lord Goring told me +that if ever I was in trouble I could come to him for help, as he +was our oldest and best friend. Later on, after that +terrible scene in this room, I wrote to him telling him that I +trusted him, that I had need of him, that I was coming to him for +help and advice. [<span class="smcap">sir robert +chiltern</span> <i>takes the letter out of his pocket</i>.] +Yes, that letter. I didn’t go to Lord Goring’s, +after all. I felt that it is from ourselves alone that help +can come. Pride made me think that. Mrs. Cheveley +went. She stole my letter and sent it anonymously to you +this morning, that you should think . . . Oh! Robert, I cannot +tell you what she wished you to think. . . .</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +What! Had I fallen so low in your eyes that you thought +that even for a moment I could have doubted your goodness? +Gertrude, Gertrude, you are to me the white image of all good +things, and sin can never touch you. Arthur, you can go to +Mabel, and you have my best wishes! Oh! stop a +moment. There is no name at the beginning of this +letter. The brilliant Mrs. Cheveley does not seem to have +noticed that. There should be a name.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. Let me write +yours. It is you I trust and need. You and none +else.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Well, really, +Lady Chiltern, I think I should have back my own letter.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. +[<i>Smiling</i>.] No; you shall have Mabel. [<i>Takes +the letter and writes her husband’s name on it</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Well, I hope she +hasn’t changed her mind. It’s nearly twenty +minutes since I saw her last.</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span> +<i>and</i> <span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. Lord Goring, +I think your father’s conversation much more improving than +yours. I am only going to talk to Lord Caversham in the +future, and always under the usual palm tree.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Darling! +[<i>Kisses her</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. +[<i>Considerably taken aback</i>.] What does this mean, +sir? You don’t mean to say that this charming, clever +young lady has been so foolish as to accept you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Certainly, +father! And Chiltern’s been wise enough to accept the +seat in the Cabinet.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. I am very +glad to hear that, Chiltern . . . I congratulate you, sir. +If the country doesn’t go to the dogs or the Radicals, we +shall have you Prime Minister, some day.</p> + +<p>[<i>Enter</i> <span class="smcap">mason</span>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mason</span>. Luncheon is on the +table, my Lady!</p> + +<p>[<span class="smcap">mason</span> <i>goes out</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. You’ll +stop to luncheon, Lord Caversham, won’t you?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. With +pleasure, and I’ll drive you down to Downing Street +afterwards, Chiltern. You have a great future before you, a +great future. Wish I could say the same for you, sir. +[<i>To</i> <span class="smcap">lord goring</span>.] But +your career will have to be entirely domestic.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord goring</span>. Yes, father, I +prefer it domestic.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. And if you +don’t make this young lady an ideal husband, I’ll cut +you off with a shilling.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. An ideal +husband! Oh, I don’t think I should like that. +It sounds like something in the next world.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. What do you +want him to be then, dear?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">mabel chiltern</span>. He can be +what he chooses. All I want is to be . . . to be . . . oh! +a real wife to him.</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lord caversham</span>. Upon my word, +there is a good deal of common sense in that, Lady Chiltern.</p> + +<p>[<i>They all go out except</i> <span class="smcap">sir robert +chiltern</span>. <i>He sinks in a chair</i>, <i>wrapt in +thought</i>. <i>After a little time</i> <span +class="smcap">lady chiltern</span> <i>returns to look for +him</i>.]</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>Leaning +over the back of the chair</i>.] Aren’t you coming +in, Robert?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">sir robert chiltern</span>. +[<i>Taking her hand</i>.] Gertrude, is it love you feel for +me, or is it pity merely?</p> + +<p><span class="smcap">lady chiltern</span>. [<i>Kisses +him</i>.] It is love, Robert. Love, and only +love. For both of us a new life is beginning.</p> +<p style="text-align: center"><span +class="smcap">Curtain</span></p> +<div class="gapspace"></div> +<div class="gapshortline"></div> +<p style="text-align: center"><span class="smcap">the +northumberland press</span>, <span +class="smcap">newcastle-upon-tyne</span></p> + +<div style='display:block;margin-top:4em'>*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK AN IDEAL HUSBAND ***</div> +<div style='display:block;margin:1em 0;'>This file should be named 885-h.htm or 885-h.zip</div> +<div style='display:block;margin:1em 0;'>This and all associated files of various formats will be found in https://www.gutenberg.org/8/8/885/</div> +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +Updated editions will replace the previous one—the old editions will +be renamed. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright +law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, +so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United +States without permission and without paying copyright +royalties. Special rules, set forth in the General Terms of Use part +of this license, apply to copying and distributing Project +Gutenberg™ electronic works to protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG™ +concept and trademark. Project Gutenberg is a registered trademark, +and may not be used if you charge for an eBook, except by following +the terms of the trademark license, including paying royalties for use +of the Project Gutenberg trademark. If you do not charge anything for +copies of this eBook, complying with the trademark license is very +easy. You may use this eBook for nearly any purpose such as creation +of derivative works, reports, performances and research. Project +Gutenberg eBooks may be modified and printed and given away--you may +do practically ANYTHING in the United States with eBooks not protected +by U.S. copyright law. Redistribution is subject to the trademark +license, especially commercial redistribution. +</div> + +<div style='margin:0.83em 0; font-size:1.1em; text-align:center'>START: FULL LICENSE<br /> +<span style='font-size:smaller'>THE FULL PROJECT GUTENBERG LICENSE<br /> +PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU DISTRIBUTE OR USE THIS WORK</span> +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +To protect the Project Gutenberg™ mission of promoting the free +distribution of electronic works, by using or distributing this work +(or any other work associated in any way with the phrase “Project +Gutenberg”), you agree to comply with all the terms of the Full +Project Gutenberg™ License available with this file or online at +www.gutenberg.org/license. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; font-size:1.1em; margin:1em 0; font-weight:bold'> +Section 1. General Terms of Use and Redistributing Project Gutenberg™ electronic works +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +1.A. By reading or using any part of this Project Gutenberg™ +electronic work, you indicate that you have read, understand, agree to +and accept all the terms of this license and intellectual property +(trademark/copyright) agreement. If you do not agree to abide by all +the terms of this agreement, you must cease using and return or +destroy all copies of Project Gutenberg™ electronic works in your +possession. If you paid a fee for obtaining a copy of or access to a +Project Gutenberg™ electronic work and you do not agree to be bound +by the terms of this agreement, you may obtain a refund from the person +or entity to whom you paid the fee as set forth in paragraph 1.E.8. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +1.B. “Project Gutenberg” is a registered trademark. It may only be +used on or associated in any way with an electronic work by people who +agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement. There are a few +things that you can do with most Project Gutenberg™ electronic works +even without complying with the full terms of this agreement. See +paragraph 1.C below. There are a lot of things you can do with Project +Gutenberg™ electronic works if you follow the terms of this +agreement and help preserve free future access to Project Gutenberg™ +electronic works. See paragraph 1.E below. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +1.C. The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation (“the +Foundation” or PGLAF), owns a compilation copyright in the collection +of Project Gutenberg™ electronic works. Nearly all the individual +works in the collection are in the public domain in the United +States. If an individual work is unprotected by copyright law in the +United States and you are located in the United States, we do not +claim a right to prevent you from copying, distributing, performing, +displaying or creating derivative works based on the work as long as +all references to Project Gutenberg are removed. Of course, we hope +that you will support the Project Gutenberg™ mission of promoting +free access to electronic works by freely sharing Project Gutenberg™ +works in compliance with the terms of this agreement for keeping the +Project Gutenberg™ name associated with the work. You can easily +comply with the terms of this agreement by keeping this work in the +same format with its attached full Project Gutenberg™ License when +you share it without charge with others. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +1.D. The copyright laws of the place where you are located also govern +what you can do with this work. Copyright laws in most countries are +in a constant state of change. If you are outside the United States, +check the laws of your country in addition to the terms of this +agreement before downloading, copying, displaying, performing, +distributing or creating derivative works based on this work or any +other Project Gutenberg™ work. The Foundation makes no +representations concerning the copyright status of any work in any +country other than the United States. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +1.E. Unless you have removed all references to Project Gutenberg: +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +1.E.1. The following sentence, with active links to, or other +immediate access to, the full Project Gutenberg™ License must appear +prominently whenever any copy of a Project Gutenberg™ work (any work +on which the phrase “Project Gutenberg” appears, or with which the +phrase “Project Gutenberg” is associated) is accessed, displayed, +performed, viewed, copied or distributed: +</div> + +<blockquote> + <div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> + This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most + other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions + whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms + of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online + at <a href="https://www.gutenberg.org">www.gutenberg.org</a>. If you + are not located in the United States, you will have to check the laws + of the country where you are located before using this eBook. + </div> +</blockquote> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +1.E.2. If an individual Project Gutenberg™ electronic work is +derived from texts not protected by U.S. copyright law (does not +contain a notice indicating that it is posted with permission of the +copyright holder), the work can be copied and distributed to anyone in +the United States without paying any fees or charges. If you are +redistributing or providing access to a work with the phrase “Project +Gutenberg” associated with or appearing on the work, you must comply +either with the requirements of paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 or +obtain permission for the use of the work and the Project Gutenberg™ +trademark as set forth in paragraphs 1.E.8 or 1.E.9. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +1.E.3. If an individual Project Gutenberg™ electronic work is posted +with the permission of the copyright holder, your use and distribution +must comply with both paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 and any +additional terms imposed by the copyright holder. Additional terms +will be linked to the Project Gutenberg™ License for all works +posted with the permission of the copyright holder found at the +beginning of this work. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +1.E.4. Do not unlink or detach or remove the full Project Gutenberg™ +License terms from this work, or any files containing a part of this +work or any other work associated with Project Gutenberg™. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +1.E.5. Do not copy, display, perform, distribute or redistribute this +electronic work, or any part of this electronic work, without +prominently displaying the sentence set forth in paragraph 1.E.1 with +active links or immediate access to the full terms of the Project +Gutenberg™ License. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +1.E.6. You may convert to and distribute this work in any binary, +compressed, marked up, nonproprietary or proprietary form, including +any word processing or hypertext form. However, if you provide access +to or distribute copies of a Project Gutenberg™ work in a format +other than “Plain Vanilla ASCII” or other format used in the official +version posted on the official Project Gutenberg™ website +(www.gutenberg.org), you must, at no additional cost, fee or expense +to the user, provide a copy, a means of exporting a copy, or a means +of obtaining a copy upon request, of the work in its original “Plain +Vanilla ASCII” or other form. Any alternate format must include the +full Project Gutenberg™ License as specified in paragraph 1.E.1. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +1.E.7. Do not charge a fee for access to, viewing, displaying, +performing, copying or distributing any Project Gutenberg™ works +unless you comply with paragraph 1.E.8 or 1.E.9. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +1.E.8. You may charge a reasonable fee for copies of or providing +access to or distributing Project Gutenberg™ electronic works +provided that: +</div> + +<div style='margin-left:0.7em;'> + <div style='text-indent:-0.7em'> + • You pay a royalty fee of 20% of the gross profits you derive from + the use of Project Gutenberg™ works calculated using the method + you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. The fee is owed + to the owner of the Project Gutenberg™ trademark, but he has + agreed to donate royalties under this paragraph to the Project + Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation. Royalty payments must be paid + within 60 days following each date on which you prepare (or are + legally required to prepare) your periodic tax returns. Royalty + payments should be clearly marked as such and sent to the Project + Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation at the address specified in + Section 4, “Information about donations to the Project Gutenberg + Literary Archive Foundation.” + </div> + + <div style='text-indent:-0.7em'> + • You provide a full refund of any money paid by a user who notifies + you in writing (or by e-mail) within 30 days of receipt that s/he + does not agree to the terms of the full Project Gutenberg™ + License. You must require such a user to return or destroy all + copies of the works possessed in a physical medium and discontinue + all use of and all access to other copies of Project Gutenberg™ + works. + </div> + + <div style='text-indent:-0.7em'> + • You provide, in accordance with paragraph 1.F.3, a full refund of + any money paid for a work or a replacement copy, if a defect in the + electronic work is discovered and reported to you within 90 days of + receipt of the work. + </div> + + <div style='text-indent:-0.7em'> + • You comply with all other terms of this agreement for free + distribution of Project Gutenberg™ works. + </div> +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +1.E.9. If you wish to charge a fee or distribute a Project +Gutenberg™ electronic work or group of works on different terms than +are set forth in this agreement, you must obtain permission in writing +from the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the manager of +the Project Gutenberg™ trademark. Contact the Foundation as set +forth in Section 3 below. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +1.F. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +1.F.1. Project Gutenberg volunteers and employees expend considerable +effort to identify, do copyright research on, transcribe and proofread +works not protected by U.S. copyright law in creating the Project +Gutenberg™ collection. Despite these efforts, Project Gutenberg™ +electronic works, and the medium on which they may be stored, may +contain “Defects,” such as, but not limited to, incomplete, inaccurate +or corrupt data, transcription errors, a copyright or other +intellectual property infringement, a defective or damaged disk or +other medium, a computer virus, or computer codes that damage or +cannot be read by your equipment. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +1.F.2. LIMITED WARRANTY, DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES - Except for the “Right +of Replacement or Refund” described in paragraph 1.F.3, the Project +Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the owner of the Project +Gutenberg™ trademark, and any other party distributing a Project +Gutenberg™ electronic work under this agreement, disclaim all +liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal +fees. YOU AGREE THAT YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE, STRICT +LIABILITY, BREACH OF WARRANTY OR BREACH OF CONTRACT EXCEPT THOSE +PROVIDED IN PARAGRAPH 1.F.3. YOU AGREE THAT THE FOUNDATION, THE +TRADEMARK OWNER, AND ANY DISTRIBUTOR UNDER THIS AGREEMENT WILL NOT BE +LIABLE TO YOU FOR ACTUAL, DIRECT, INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR +INCIDENTAL DAMAGES EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH +DAMAGE. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +1.F.3. LIMITED RIGHT OF REPLACEMENT OR REFUND - If you discover a +defect in this electronic work within 90 days of receiving it, you can +receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending a +written explanation to the person you received the work from. If you +received the work on a physical medium, you must return the medium +with your written explanation. The person or entity that provided you +with the defective work may elect to provide a replacement copy in +lieu of a refund. If you received the work electronically, the person +or entity providing it to you may choose to give you a second +opportunity to receive the work electronically in lieu of a refund. If +the second copy is also defective, you may demand a refund in writing +without further opportunities to fix the problem. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +1.F.4. Except for the limited right of replacement or refund set forth +in paragraph 1.F.3, this work is provided to you ‘AS-IS’, WITH NO +OTHER WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT +LIMITED TO WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY OR FITNESS FOR ANY PURPOSE. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +1.F.5. Some states do not allow disclaimers of certain implied +warranties or the exclusion or limitation of certain types of +damages. If any disclaimer or limitation set forth in this agreement +violates the law of the state applicable to this agreement, the +agreement shall be interpreted to make the maximum disclaimer or +limitation permitted by the applicable state law. The invalidity or +unenforceability of any provision of this agreement shall not void the +remaining provisions. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +1.F.6. INDEMNITY - You agree to indemnify and hold the Foundation, the +trademark owner, any agent or employee of the Foundation, anyone +providing copies of Project Gutenberg™ electronic works in +accordance with this agreement, and any volunteers associated with the +production, promotion and distribution of Project Gutenberg™ +electronic works, harmless from all liability, costs and expenses, +including legal fees, that arise directly or indirectly from any of +the following which you do or cause to occur: (a) distribution of this +or any Project Gutenberg™ work, (b) alteration, modification, or +additions or deletions to any Project Gutenberg™ work, and (c) any +Defect you cause. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; font-size:1.1em; margin:1em 0; font-weight:bold'> +Section 2. Information about the Mission of Project Gutenberg™ +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +Project Gutenberg™ is synonymous with the free distribution of +electronic works in formats readable by the widest variety of +computers including obsolete, old, middle-aged and new computers. It +exists because of the efforts of hundreds of volunteers and donations +from people in all walks of life. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +Volunteers and financial support to provide volunteers with the +assistance they need are critical to reaching Project Gutenberg™’s +goals and ensuring that the Project Gutenberg™ collection will +remain freely available for generations to come. In 2001, the Project +Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation was created to provide a secure +and permanent future for Project Gutenberg™ and future +generations. To learn more about the Project Gutenberg Literary +Archive Foundation and how your efforts and donations can help, see +Sections 3 and 4 and the Foundation information page at www.gutenberg.org. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; font-size:1.1em; margin:1em 0; font-weight:bold'> +Section 3. Information about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation is a non-profit +501(c)(3) educational corporation organized under the laws of the +state of Mississippi and granted tax exempt status by the Internal +Revenue Service. The Foundation’s EIN or federal tax identification +number is 64-6221541. Contributions to the Project Gutenberg Literary +Archive Foundation are tax deductible to the full extent permitted by +U.S. federal laws and your state’s laws. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +The Foundation’s business office is located at 809 North 1500 West, +Salt Lake City, UT 84116, (801) 596-1887. Email contact links and up +to date contact information can be found at the Foundation’s website +and official page at www.gutenberg.org/contact +</div> + +<div style='display:block; font-size:1.1em; margin:1em 0; font-weight:bold'> +Section 4. Information about Donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +Project Gutenberg™ depends upon and cannot survive without widespread +public support and donations to carry out its mission of +increasing the number of public domain and licensed works that can be +freely distributed in machine-readable form accessible by the widest +array of equipment including outdated equipment. Many small donations +($1 to $5,000) are particularly important to maintaining tax exempt +status with the IRS. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +The Foundation is committed to complying with the laws regulating +charities and charitable donations in all 50 states of the United +States. Compliance requirements are not uniform and it takes a +considerable effort, much paperwork and many fees to meet and keep up +with these requirements. We do not solicit donations in locations +where we have not received written confirmation of compliance. To SEND +DONATIONS or determine the status of compliance for any particular state +visit <a href="https://www.gutenberg.org/donate/">www.gutenberg.org/donate</a>. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +While we cannot and do not solicit contributions from states where we +have not met the solicitation requirements, we know of no prohibition +against accepting unsolicited donations from donors in such states who +approach us with offers to donate. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +International donations are gratefully accepted, but we cannot make +any statements concerning tax treatment of donations received from +outside the United States. U.S. laws alone swamp our small staff. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +Please check the Project Gutenberg web pages for current donation +methods and addresses. Donations are accepted in a number of other +ways including checks, online payments and credit card donations. To +donate, please visit: www.gutenberg.org/donate +</div> + +<div style='display:block; font-size:1.1em; margin:1em 0; font-weight:bold'> +Section 5. General Information About Project Gutenberg™ electronic works +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +Professor Michael S. Hart was the originator of the Project +Gutenberg™ concept of a library of electronic works that could be +freely shared with anyone. For forty years, he produced and +distributed Project Gutenberg™ eBooks with only a loose network of +volunteer support. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +Project Gutenberg™ eBooks are often created from several printed +editions, all of which are confirmed as not protected by copyright in +the U.S. unless a copyright notice is included. Thus, we do not +necessarily keep eBooks in compliance with any particular paper +edition. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +Most people start at our website which has the main PG search +facility: <a href="https://www.gutenberg.org">www.gutenberg.org</a>. +</div> + +<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> +This website includes information about Project Gutenberg™, +including how to make donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary +Archive Foundation, how to help produce our new eBooks, and how to +subscribe to our email newsletter to hear about new eBooks. +</div> + +</body> +</html> |