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+*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 79377 ***
+
+
+
+
+
+
+[Frontispiece: "SHE SAW JOHN JAMES SITTING ASTRIDE THE WINDOW SILL."
+_p._ 21.]
+
+
+
+  THE
+
+  GOLLIWOG NEWS.
+
+  A STORY OF THREE CHILDREN
+  AND A TOY NEWSPAPER.
+
+
+  WITH SUPPLEMENT.
+
+
+  BY
+
+  PHILIP AND FAY INCHFAWN.
+
+
+  ILLUSTRATIONS BY T. C. SMITH.
+
+
+  London:
+  S. W. PARTRIDGE & CO., LTD.
+  OLD BAILEY.
+
+
+
+
+  FIRST EDITION, 1913.
+  SECOND EDITION, 1914.
+  THIRD EDITION, 1917.
+  FOURTH EDITION, 1919.
+
+
+
+
+  CONTENTS
+
+
+  I. What Gladys Found
+  II. After the Party
+  III. The Seaside Excursion
+  IV. At the Football Match
+  V. The Dolls Parliament
+  VI. The Scarecrow
+  VII. Birdland City
+  VIII. Who Killed Cock Robin
+  IX. Visit to Fish Town
+  X. The Banquet
+  XI. At The Exhibition
+  XII. The Christmas Party
+  Newspaper Supplement
+
+
+
+
+LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS.
+
+
+"She saw John James sitting astride the window sill." ...
+Frontispiece.
+
+"He picked a dandelion and began to blow at it counting the while."
+
+"Wasn't that a fine goal."
+
+"The bagpipes were played by a flamingo dressed in a kilt and wearing
+a tam-o-shanter."
+
+"Six owls arranged themselves in a semi-circle and sang in chorus."
+[Missing from source book]
+
+"'How do!' he said pleasantly, 'fine doings here, to-day.'"
+
+"The last item on the programme was a humorous song by Mr. Merry
+Codfish."
+
+"There never was such a Christmas Party before nor since."
+
+
+
+
+  _BOOKS BY THE SAME AUTHORS._
+
+  FATHER NEPTUNE'S TREASURE.
+  FATHER NEPTUNE'S DIAMOND.
+
+  LONDON:
+  S. W. PARTRIDGE AND CO., LTD.
+  OLD BAILEY.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+  "I want my Golly," Miss Gladys said,
+  As she softly slipped from her downy bed,
+  Pattering over the nursery floor,
+  Feeling about by the nursery door.
+  But you never would guess, if you guessed all night,
+  What Gladys found in the pale moonlight.
+
+
+
+THE GOLLIWOG NEWS.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER I.
+
+WHAT GLADYS FOUND.
+
+Gladys was ten, and John James belonged to her.
+
+John James was the big Golliwog, and the little girl always took him
+to bed with her.  But, somehow, he used to get out of bed in the
+night and would be found lying on the nursery floor in the morning.
+
+Gladys had a big lady-doll named Adeliza May, and a very grand
+gentleman-doll who wore a white wig like that of a judge.  She called
+him Mortimer Max, because he looked so solemn, and Gladys, as you may
+guess, was very proud of him.  She nursed him a good deal, and
+sometimes slapped him very hard, but he was so strong he never seemed
+to mind anything, not even when Carlo worried him.  Carlo was a nice
+little fox terrier, who also belonged to Gladys, and she had a pretty
+tortoiseshell kitten, named Spottikins, as well.
+
+But the toy she loved best of all was her big Golliwog.  He was
+scarcely a handsome Golly.  Golliwogs aren't handsome, as a rule, now
+are they?  But John James was a particularly fine fellow.  He had
+bright shining eyes like polished shoe buttons, a quantity of black
+bristling hair, and a very broad smile.
+
+Gladys called him John after the gardener, and James after the boy
+who cleaned the boots and knives.  She was fond of them both, you
+see, and did not want either of them to feel jealous.  Gladys also
+had a Toy Monkey, a very funny grinning Billikins, and two little
+Nigger Boys, who were so much alike that the little girl said they
+must be twins.
+
+The house where Gladys lived was in the country, with lanes and
+fields all around.  There were only two other houses near and Freda
+Morris lived in one, and Tommy Stapleton in the other.
+
+Freda had a beautiful sailor-doll named Jolly Jack.  She always
+brought him with her when she came to see Gladys, and very proud she
+was of his bright yellow buttons and his midshipman's hat.
+
+Tommy Stapleton did not care for dolls.  What boy does?  But he had a
+large Teddy Bear for a pet, which he dragged along on a silver chain.
+Teddy had a very cunning, crafty face, and Gladys and Freda both
+disliked him.
+
+Now at the time when this story begins, it was the end of the summer
+and Gladys had just had her birthday party.  It was a very delightful
+affair.  Tommy came and brought his Teddy, and Freda brought Jolly
+Jack.  Some little cousins of Gladys' came in a cab and brought their
+dolls and two baby Teddies with them.
+
+Adeliza May and John James were dressed in their best and sat up to
+the table just like real people.  All the visitors admired
+Spottikins, Carlo rushed to and fro and barked, and between whiles he
+sat and begged for pieces of the pink iced cake with "Gladys" written
+across the top.
+
+Gladys went to bed that night at a quarter to ten o'clock.  It was
+much beyond her usual time, and she was very tired.  She had had an
+exciting day, and one or two curious things had happened.
+
+The toy motor, which Tommy Stapleton had given her for a birthday
+present, nearly ran over the two little Teddies--they were twins and
+were her small cousins' especial pets.  Happily they were not hurt.
+But this was not all.  Somebody at the party--no one knew who--had
+cut off Jolly Jack's gold buttons.  Every single one!  Freda cried
+when she discovered what had happened; Jolly Jack looked very
+crestfallen, and John James' bright eyes and his sharp funny little
+nose, seemed more intelligent than ever.
+
+All these things came back to Gladys as she undressed herself, and
+she remembered very clearly that Tommy Stapleton's wicked Teddy had
+looked as if he were laughing.
+
+"Horrid creature!" said Gladys to herself.  Then she got into bed and
+went to sleep.
+
+In the middle of the night she woke, and felt under the bedclothes
+for John James.  He was not there, and then Gladys suddenly
+remembered that she had left him on the sofa in the day nursery.
+
+Very quietly she slipped out of bed, and tiptoed across the landing
+in her white night-dress.  She shivered a little for the windows were
+wide open.  It was a clear night, and outside in the lane the
+telegraph wires were making a curious zuz-z-z-z-z-ing sound.
+
+Gladys crept towards the sofa.  Where was John James?  She was quite
+sure she had left him propped up against the hard horse-hair cushion,
+and now she could not find him.
+
+She got down upon her hands and knees and felt in the crack between
+the sofa and the toy cupboard.  John James might have fallen, but no,
+he was not there.
+
+Gladys could not find anything but a scrap of torn paper.  She
+straightened it out to look at it, and the word "Golliwog" caught her
+eye.
+
+"This might be something about John James," said the little girl,
+smiling to herself, and down she went again on her knees to see
+whether she could find anything more.  Yes, there was something
+inside the crack, which seemed like a piece of folded paper.
+
+Gladys pulled it out--it was a tiny, tiny newspaper, and there was
+the title:
+
+THE GOLLIWOG NEWS.
+
+
+The moon shone out from behind a cloud and Gladys could see quite
+plainly.  The paper was printed and folded exactly like the one her
+father had every day, only Gladys saw that this newspaper circulated
+in Toy-Town-on-Sea, Dolls House City, and ever so many other funny
+places.
+
+She began to read the head lines, forgetting that her little pink
+feet were bare and that the wind was blowing her curls hither and
+thither over her shoulders.
+
+Gladys read aloud:
+
+  "BIRTHDAY PARTY ACCIDENT."
+  "NARROW ESCAPE OF TEDDY TWINS."
+
+
+At that the little girl nearly screamed for it was all about her toy
+motor and her party, and the little twin Teddies that belonged to her
+cousins.
+
+"Well, I never!" exclaimed Gladys very loudly; then, looking up, she
+saw John James sitting astride the window sill.  He had his coat off
+and was writing as fast as ever he could.
+
+"How did you get there?" cried Gladys, rushing to the window and
+picking him up by one leg.
+
+The Golliwog scowled at her, wrenched himself free, and ran back to
+the window sill.
+
+Gladys gazed at her refractory pet.
+
+"Wait half a minute," he said, "I'm busy."
+
+So Gladys waited.  John James scribbled and muttered for five minutes
+longer.  Then he jumped down and sat on the sofa beside his mistress.
+
+While she had been waiting for him Gladys had read the little
+newspaper.  It was all about Dolls, Teddy Bears, Golliwogs and
+Pollywogs--Pollywogs, as you will easily guess, are lady Gollies.  In
+fact, there seemed to be something in the newspaper about all the
+Toys and Pets, Gladys had ever heard of.  It was really a most
+amazing discovery.
+
+The advertisements were the funniest Gladys had ever read, and the
+idea of cats and dogs forming themselves into a Golliwog League and
+playing football sent her into fits of laughter.
+
+"I'm the Editor," said John James proudly.
+
+"Oh!" said Gladys, and her round eyes opened wider with surprise.
+
+"Is Carlo in it?" she began, but John James was not listening, he had
+rushed to the window again.
+
+"Sh! sh!" he said.  "It's going on again."
+
+"What's going on?" asked Gladys as she crept nearer.
+
+"Zuz-z-z-z-y!" went the telegraph wires, and John James scribbled
+away madly.  At last he stopped, and asked Gladys to lend him a
+handkerchief.  She found a very dirty one hidden under the sofa
+cushion, and watched him mop his face with it.
+
+"That was a very near thing!" exclaimed the Golliwog.  "I might have
+been in bed and asleep.  Oh, my!  It's a great piece of news.  Don't
+you think so?"
+
+"You haven't told me yet what it is," said Glady crossly, for she was
+dying to ask all kinds of questions about the newspaper.
+
+"Oh, haven't I?"  John James wiped his hairy forehead again.
+
+"Well, he's been caught--the Teddy who stole the gold buttons off
+Master Jack Midshipman's coat.  Surely you must have heard about
+that?"
+
+"You don't mean Jolly Jack's buttons, do you?  Of course, I knew he
+lost them off his coat last night.  Freda cried about it.  Did you
+say it was a Teddy who stole them?"
+
+"I did," answered John James.
+
+"Then I know who it was!" cried Gladys dancing to and fro in the
+moonlight.  "It was that horrid Teddy of Tommy Stapleton's.  Shall
+you put it in the paper?  And will poor Freda get the buttons back?"
+
+"One question at a time," replied the Golliwog grandly.  "An account
+of the trial will appear in the _News_, and the buttons--the solid
+gold buttons--will be placed in the Royal Golliwogland Museum."
+
+"Then Freda won't get them----" began Gladys.
+
+"But she can go and see them some day," cried John James eagerly;
+"just think of that!"
+
+Gladys was thoroughly interested.  But something suddenly creaked in
+the night nursery, and seizing John James in her arms, the little
+girl hurried back to bed.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+  Buttons!  Bright with golden lustre,
+    Found at last, though snugly hid;
+  Wasn't Teddy in a fluster?
+    Read, and see what Tommy did.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER II.
+
+AFTER THE PARTY.
+
+"It's all true," said Gladys in an offended voice.  "But, of course,
+you needn't believe it if you don't want to.  Carlo, I wish you
+wouldn't bark."
+
+The two little girls were having tea together, and Gladys had been
+telling Freda about _The Golliwog News_.
+
+Freda slapped her sailor doll, Jolly Jack.  He was eating much too
+fast, she explained.  Then she put her arm round Gladys.
+
+"Of course I believe it," she said.  "I wish I had been there.  Do
+you think I could come next time?  I should like to see the Gollies'
+newspaper, and do you think--do you really think I could go to
+Golliwogland and see Jack's gold buttons in the Museum?"
+
+"I don't know," said Gladys.  "John James hasn't spoken to me since,
+and Adeliza May has been so troublesome you'd never believe.  She
+tore the dress I made her for the party and I'm worried to death."
+
+"How very vexing!" said Freda, looking severely at Adeliza May.  "But
+I had a trying time myself this morning.  Someone had eaten all the
+jam out of my nursery stores.  You know the box of things I had last
+Christmas with the scales and sweets and little pots of jam?  Well, I
+had one pot left--black currant it was--and every bit has
+disappeared.  It's most annoying."
+
+"It is," agreed Gladys, nibbling daintily at her cake, while her
+Golliwog stared steadily from the window seat, and Carlo sat up to
+beg.
+
+"Then there were Jack's buttons," Freda went on sadly.  "I've had to
+put trouser buttons on his coat.  It's a great shame.  He'll never
+look such a handsome sailor again.  I wish I could get that Teddy.
+I'd set Carlo at him."
+
+Carlo, hearing his name mentioned, jumped up and barked.  He capered
+round and round the room, chased a piece of cake into the window
+seat, and knocked John James down.
+
+Gladys and Freda flew to the rescue.  There was a general stampede,
+and when they were all settled in their places again there was a loud
+knock at the front door.  The two little girls jumped up.
+
+"Let's run out and look over the bannisters," said Gladys, and off
+they trotted.
+
+"It's Mrs. Stapleton," whispered Freda.  "I saw the feather in her
+bonnet.  Oh! and Tommy is with her, and he has brought that hateful
+Teddy."
+
+Freda turned quite white.  She and Gladys rushed back to the nursery
+and shut the door.  But the very next minute, Jane, the housemaid,
+came up to say that Master Tommy Stapleton had come with his mamma,
+and would take tea with Miss Gladys and Miss Freda.
+
+A moment later Tommy marched in.
+
+"Hullo! here we are again," he shouted, putting his big Teddy down
+beside Jolly Jack.
+
+"What have you for tea?  Any cake left over from the party?  I liked
+that creamy stuff with the pink sugar on it."
+
+"You are a greedy boy," said Gladys severely; "and you had better
+leave your Teddy outside."
+
+"Whatever for?" cried Tommy, seizing his pet and holding him upside
+down by one leg.  "He's better than your old Golliwog any day."
+
+"He isn't!" cried Gladys.  "John James can talk, can't he Freda?  And
+your Teddy is nothing but a thief."
+
+"That's a bit too tall," said Tommy, getting very red; "but Teddy and
+I won't stop here with two silly little girls.  Come along, Teddy
+Boy," and Tommy walked towards the nursery door.
+
+"But I wanted a bun," screamed the Bear, and he darted across the
+room, seized a bun from the table and ate it greedily.
+
+In a moment the Golliwog had jumped off the window seat, and Jolly
+Jack leaped from his chair.
+
+"Thump him!" cried Adeliza May.  "It was he who tore my dress at the
+party, and Miss Gladys thought I did it myself.  Hit him, Mr. Jack!
+Don't spare him, Mr. Golliwog."
+
+"Not much!" cried Jolly Jack.  "We'll let him have it."
+
+And between them they pummelled Teddy's woolly body till he howled
+for mercy.
+
+Tommy had come back to the table, and the little girls were much too
+startled to speak.
+
+Gladys was the first to find her tongue, and while the three Toys
+were having their desperate fight she managed to tell Tommy all about
+his Teddy and the gold buttons.
+
+Tommy was horrified.  He stuck his hands in his pockets and stood,
+with his legs wide apart, considering the situation.
+
+"The young bounder!" he cried.
+
+"But how did he manage to get away?" queried Gladys.  "John James
+told me last night that he had been captured and put in prison."
+
+"Out on bail, I expect," remarked Tommy, and he explained, rather
+grandly, that this was sometimes allowed.
+
+"Carlo's bitten a piece out of his ear!" cried Freda.  "Don't you
+think he's had enough?"
+
+"I say, just stop that fighting!" commanded Tommy sharply.  "Now,
+Teddy, my boy, what have you got to say for yourself?"
+
+Jolly Jack and the Golliwog fell back, panting for breath.
+
+The trouser buttons on Jack's dark navy suit were sewn on with white
+cotton and made him look slovenly and untidy.
+
+John James' eyes were fierce with anger, and his hair positively
+bristled as he sat down in the window seat once more and allowed
+Teddy's master to deal with him.
+
+[Illustration: "HE PICKED A DANDELION AND BEGAN TO BLOW AT IT,
+COUNTING THE WHILE."]
+
+Tommy sat on the arm of the sofa, with his legs crossed in what he
+thought was a very grown-up attitude.
+
+"Now, Teddy," he said, "what is the meaning of this?  Is it really
+true that you _did_ cut those buttons off Jolly Jack's coat?"
+
+Teddy got down on his knees, and began hitting his head against the
+sofa.
+
+"If you please--_bang_--I'm very sorry--_bang_--and I'll never do it
+again"--_bang--bang--bang_.
+
+"Hand out those buttons," demanded Tommy, "and leave off hitting your
+stupid head in that idiotic way."
+
+"I haven't got them," said Teddy getting up, and beginning to dance
+on one toe.  "I don't know where they are."
+
+"Why did you take them?" asked Gladys, giving him a little shake.
+
+"I was going to buy a present for Adeliza May," whimpered the Bear.
+
+"How dare you!" screamed Jolly Jack.
+
+"Don't tell stories," began Gladys, and she shook him again.  "I
+believe I felt something inside his coat," she said suddenly.
+
+"Come here," said Tommy to the Bear in a very loud and awful voice.
+
+Teddy obeyed without a word, and Tommy felt all over his loose brown
+coat and found a hard round substance behind his ear.
+
+"What's this?" he said, holding it fast with a piece of Teddy's fur.
+
+"It's a nut," remarked the wicked Bear.  "I--er--swallowed it by
+accident yesterday, and it went behind my ear, and it's been there
+ever since."
+
+"What's this, then?" yelled John James seizing Teddy's leg.  "Here's
+another nut."
+
+"And another!" cried Jolly Jack who had taken hold of the Bear's
+elbow.
+
+Then Teddy saw that the game was up.  He opened a small hole in the
+lining of his coat, shook himself, and six yellow buttons tumbled on
+to the carpet.
+
+Tommy picked them up and handed them to John James.
+
+"I understand you take charge of these," he said.
+
+The Golliwog placed them in an inner pocket for safety and made a
+note in his pocket-book.
+
+"But what shall we do with Teddy?" asked Freda.  "He ought to be
+punished."
+
+"He spoke of buying Adeliza May a present," said Jolly Jack getting
+very red in the face.
+
+"He told stories and ate the biggest bath bun," said Gladys.
+
+"Shall I bite him?" asked Carlo eagerly.
+
+"Pop him into the toy cupboard," suggested Tommy holding open the
+door.
+
+"I'll do it," said John James, and he and Jolly Jack between them
+thrust him in with no very gentle hands, and Tommy turned the key in
+the lock.
+
+"You did that pretty well, you two," began Tommy.
+
+But neither John James nor Jolly Jack made any reply.
+
+The Golliwog was sitting in the window with his usual stony stare,
+while the sailor doll was lying against the table leg.
+
+The children glanced towards the nursery door and saw that Gladys'
+mother and Mrs. Stapleton stood there.
+
+"Time to go home, Tommy," said his mother.  "Come along, my son."
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+  How everyone journeyed to Toy-Town-on-Sea.
+  And had jam-tarts for dinner and pancakes for tea.
+  How everyone paddled and walked by the shore.
+  And how wicked Teddy was captured once more.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER III.
+
+THE SEASIDE EXCURSION.
+
+Gladys was tired of staying in the house.  She had carried John James
+and Adeliza May downstairs, and was sitting with them in the garden.
+
+Carlo was worrying an old straw hat which he had discovered in a
+corner of the shrubbery, and Spottikins sat upon Gladys' shoulder and
+purred.
+
+Presently Gladys yawned, and drew _The Golliwog News_ out of her
+pocket.  Things were rather dull, for she had had a bad cold, and her
+Golly had not spoken to her for a week.
+
+Besides this, another annoying thing had happened.  Tommy Stapleton's
+Teddy Bear had escaped from the toy cupboard and had not been seen
+since.  No one knew where he was, and Gladys was thinking about him
+as she unfolded the neat little newspaper and began to read.
+
+  EXCURSION TO TOY-TOWN-ON-SEA.
+  GOLLIWOG AND TEDDY BEAR RAILWAY.
+
+
+"It sounds jolly," said Gladys; then turning to John James she added:
+
+"Are you going by the excursion?"
+
+"Of course I am," said John James, polishing up his scarlet nose and
+rubbing his hairy legs.  "I'm going in ten minutes."
+
+"What?" cried Gladys, looking at the newspaper.  "Why, of course,
+it's to-day!"
+
+"Good gracious me!  Where's Adeliza May?" she continued, as she
+noticed for the first time that Adeliza had disappeared.
+
+"Gone in to tidy her hair and put on her best hat, I expect.  It's
+the last excursion this season," said the Golliwog, hurrying down the
+path to the gate.
+
+Gladys followed him, and she was surprised to see a crowd of Teddy
+Bears, Dolls, Golliwogs, Pollywogs, and even Cats and Dogs which she
+knew quite well by sight, hurrying down the road towards the railway
+station.
+
+"How happy they look!" cried Gladys; "and how they are talking!  Oh,
+see that little Bear in the brown knickers carrying a spade and
+bucket.  Oh, John James, I do want to go too.  Can't I come?"
+
+"Why, yes, I should think so," said the Golliwog loftily, "but I
+can't wait for you, you must come on by yourself.  I have to be at
+the station early."
+
+"All right," said Gladys.  She snatched up her white sun-bonnet and
+ran off to call for Freda.  Of course Freda must go with her.  As she
+opened the garden gate she saw Carlo join the hurrying scampering
+crew, and Spottikins raced after him at a great rate and linked her
+paw with that of a tabby acquaintance.
+
+Adeliza May came sailing down the steps with an air of great
+importance, but Gladys could not stop to speak to her.  At the gate
+she stumbled against Jolly Jack, who asked rather sheepishly if
+Adeliza was ready.
+
+Gladys hurried on.  Freda was watering her garden, but when she heard
+the news she rushed off down the road with Gladys, still carrying the
+water-can in her hand.
+
+"Can't we let Tommy Stapleton come with us?" asked Freda
+breathlessly.  "Why, there he is trying to catch that yellow
+butterfly.  Quick, Gladys.  Tell him!"
+
+"I'll come," said Tommy with alacrity.  "Lessons!  Oh, bother!  I
+shan't go to school to-day.  I wish I were that yellow butterfly over
+there, and that the school-master, old Stubbins, could see me flying
+past his window.  Hurrah!  Yes, I'll come with you.  Watch me race
+that insane old Rabbit!"
+
+Off went Tommy after the Rabbit, who, by the way, was a very
+respectable fellow indeed.  He wore a black and white check suit, and
+brown leggings.  Anyone with half an eye could see that he was one of
+those worthy people who had gone back to the land.  His name was
+Peter Bunney.
+
+Tommy overtook him, and gave him a polite dig in the ribs.  The
+Rabbit looked immensely pleased, and got out an ear-trumpet.
+
+"Should you mind saying it again, sir?" said he.
+
+"I didn't say anything," remarked Tommy to himself; then he shouted
+into the trumpet:
+
+"It's a very fine morning, Mr. Bunney, and I hope we shall be in time
+for the train."
+
+"Oh, no, I don't think so at all," said the Rabbit cheerfully,
+stopping in the middle of the road, and looking up at the sky.
+
+"There'll be no rain to-day, sir."
+
+"That isn't what I said," cried Tommy, seizing his arm and dragging
+him along, "I said I hoped we should catch the train."
+
+"Then you should try mustard and water," began Peter, "and if the
+pain continues----"
+
+But Tommy had had enough of it.  While he and the Rabbit had been
+talking together Gladys and Freda had got some distance ahead, but
+now Tommy quickly overtook them, and a few minutes later they reached
+the station and got into the train.  John James was walking up and
+down the corridor making a list of all the important people.
+
+Gladys, Freda, and Tommy, naturally, occupied the same compartment,
+and they all three smiled when a large Persian Cat wearing an
+eyeglass got in with them, leaving just room for John James in the
+tiny carriage.
+
+"No one else shall get in," said Gladys, "Stand in front of the door,
+Tommy, and make faces out of the window."
+
+Of course, Tommy did so.  He put on the expression of a lunatic
+enduring great physical agony, and it was quite funny to see the
+Teddies and Gollies and the rest wandering up and down the platform,
+trying to find seats, but afraid to get in where Tommy was.
+
+At last everyone found a seat, the smart looking porters slammed the
+doors, and the guard came out with his whistle and his green flag.
+
+"Cheerup--cheerup--cheerew!" went the whistle.
+
+"Puff!  Puff!" went the engine, and then at the very last minute a
+black and white check sleeve was thrust in at the window, the door
+handle turned, and into Gladys' carriage, head over heels, tumbled
+Mr. Peter Bunney!
+
+"I nearly lost the train," he remarked pleasantly, sitting down
+beside Freda and getting out his ear trumpet.
+
+"Now there won't be room for my Golly," cried Gladys.  "What a shame!
+He would have told us all about everything.  He's such a splendid
+news-getter."
+
+The Rabbit turned towards her with a beaming face.
+
+"You are quite right," he said sweetly.  "My hearing is much better,
+that's why I'm going to Toy-Town.  I want to hear the band, and all
+that's going on.  Why, yes!  There's my old friend, Plush Mole.
+Hullo, there!  Mole--Mole!  How do, Mole?  Let me out--yes, thank
+you--good day--very pleased to have met you--see you at Toy-Town.
+Hi! there, Mole!" and off darted Mr. Peter Bunney up the corridor
+after his friend, Mr. Plush Mole.
+
+At last John James got in and sat down by the Persian Cat with the
+eye-glass.  Then for a time, at any rate, Mr. Peter Bunney was
+forgotten, although they could occasionally hear him shouting and Mr.
+Mole's carefully repeated sentences in reply.
+
+"Be quick!" said Gladys; "tell us all the news.  Where's Adeliza May?
+And who on earth is Mr. Plush Mole?"
+
+John James smiled and winked at the Persian Cat.
+
+"Miss May," he said, "is travelling with Jolly Jack.  They have a
+carriage to themselves, though how they managed it is more than
+tongue can tell."
+
+The Persian took out his eye-glass, cleaned it with the window
+curtain and stuck it in his eye again.  His name was Mr. Purr Catt,
+and John James said he was Member of Parliament for Kitten Town.
+
+"Do you know Mr. Plush Mole, sir," asked the Golliwog politely.
+
+"Ah, well--slightly," drawled the Persian.  "He's a very stay-at-home
+fellow--can't think what induced him to come to-day.  An authority on
+beetles, I believe, but proud, so I am told.  Short-sighted
+too--very."
+
+The Persian gave a great deal of interesting information, and the
+Golliwog was still scribbling in his note book when the train drew up
+at Toy-Town.
+
+"Hooray!  Hooray!" screamed all the little Teddies, scrambling out on
+to the platform.  "Hip-hip-hooray!" cried the baby Gollies.  The Cats
+mewed, and Dogs barked, and altogether it was a very merry party
+indeed that found its way to the shore.  After looking round the
+place for an hour or so, they all lunched at the Grand Hotel, and
+then went to find amusement.
+
+John James was here, there, and everywhere, and Tommy Stapleton
+followed him, but Gladys and Freda walked about together.  And when
+they got tired of that they filled Freda's water-can at one of the
+pools, and amused themselves by sprinkling little Teddies and Gollies
+with it, which so delighted a Papa Golly that he wanted to buy the
+can for two cough lozenges and a peppermint drop.
+
+"It will be so useful," he explained, "when my children are
+troublesome."
+
+But Freda would not sell the can because the peppermint looked dirty,
+just as if it had been carried in his pocket for weeks and sucked
+occasionally.
+
+When they had managed to get rid of the Papa Golliwog, they caught
+sight of Spottikins walking with Mr. Purr Catt, who wore the
+eyeglass, and they saw Carlo join himself to a band of mischievous
+Dogs who prowled up and down the sands and told everybody they were
+going to give a concert presently.
+
+The two little girls were enjoying their day at the seaside
+immensely; in the distance they could see a Punch-and-Judy show, so
+they hurried to have a look at it.
+
+There was Punch with the hump on his back, and Mrs. Judy with her
+squeaky voice, and standing among the listening crowd was Mr. Plush
+Mole, looking very puzzled and solemn as if he were not sure what it
+was all about, and beside him stood Mr. Peter Bunney holding up his
+ear-trumpet.
+
+"That's a very funny Toby," whispered Gladys.  "I never saw a dog
+Toby like that before.  Why, Freda, it's _Teddy_!  Tommy Stapleton's
+Teddy!  However did he get there?"
+
+"So it is," said Freda.  "We ought to tell John James."
+
+"There he is coming," said Gladys, and off she ran, bursting with
+eagerness to tell how she had discovered the Teddy who was "wanted"
+by all the policemen in Golliwogland.
+
+John James was as much excited as Gladys.  Freda lent him her
+water-can, and Tommy found a constable, and the three of them pushed
+their way through the crowd.
+
+Just as the wicked, much be-frilled Toby was biting Mr. Punch's
+scarlet nose, he felt a sudden stream of water splashing down his
+face, and a heavy hand on his shoulder, while a stern voice said:
+
+"Edward Bear, I arrest you."
+
+In vain he struggled and tried to jump down "behind the scenes."
+Tommy and John James assured him that anything he said would be taken
+down in writing and used against him as evidence, and after a good
+deal of scrimmaging five Golliwog policemen marched the wicked Teddy
+away.
+
+"He's a very bad lot," said Tommy rejoining Gladys and Freda, "He
+actually said he was a relation of mine; nephew, I think it was.  I'm
+glad they've caught him.  Whew!  I am hot!  Isn't it nearly tea-time?"
+
+"The time?  I'll see.  No trouble at all," said Mr. Bunney who came
+hurrying up at the moment.  He picked a dandelion and began to blow
+at it, counting the while.
+
+"One---two--three--four--five--six--"
+
+"Oh, I say," said Tommy, "it can't be six o'clock yet."  But the
+Rabbit went on.
+
+"Seven---eight--nine--ten--eleven--"
+
+"Here, come on," cried Tommy, "that old buffer's quite mad; he's
+blowing the air, not the dandelion."
+
+He hurried the little girls to the Grand Hotel, ordered tea for
+three, with ice-cream and pancakes, and the trio made an excellent
+meal.  When they had finished and were strolling along the Promenade
+towards the station, they met the Rabbit again.
+
+"It's a hundred and twenty-one o'clock." he cried.  "I thought it was
+getting late.  Time for Plush-Mole to be in-doors.  He gets asthma if
+he stays out.  I must find him," and off scampered Peter with the
+dandelion in his hand, and his trumpet sticking out of his pocket.
+
+"Who in the world is this coming now?" said Tommy.  "This is a queer
+place."
+
+"Why, it's our Carlo, isn't it?" said Gladys.  "What has he got round
+his neck?"
+
+Carlo trotted up, and they saw that round his neck he had a piece of
+cardboard tied with a bit of scarlet ribbon.  These words were
+printed on it:
+
+  GRAND CONCERT ON THE SANDS AT
+  SEVEN-THIRTY.
+  MR. BARKER PUPP WILL SING.
+
+
+"Shall we go?" said Tommy.  "Our train starts back at a quarter past
+nine.  Let's go and see what they mean to do."
+
+On the sands the Dogs had erected a kind of platform.  In one corner
+sat the orchestra--a number of Fox Terriers who played on combs--and
+really they made quite a good deal of noise.
+
+Carlo was at the piano, and every now and then he shouted
+instructions to the orchestra.  It was very funny to see him playing
+with all four of his feet; but then, as he said, he was able in this
+way to use the whole of the piano at once.
+
+It would take far too long to tell you all that these funny Doggies
+did to amuse the tremendous and ever increasing crowd of Toys, who
+came from all parts of the town to hear them.  But the song which was
+most appreciated was the one sung by Mr. Barker Pupp, who had dressed
+himself like a schoolboy, in a Norfolk suit with a satchel over his
+shoulder.  This was the first verse:
+
+    _Oh, wouldn't it be splendid
+    If my school days all were ended
+  And I could change with yonder butterfly.
+    I'd live on sweets and honey,
+  And wouldn't it be funny
+  If old Stubbins saw me gaily flutter by?_
+
+
+Tommy grew very red.
+
+"I don't care very much for that," he whispered.  "It's silly."
+
+"Be quiet," said Gladys; "there's going to be another verse."
+
+The orchestra flourished their combs, played a few bars with their
+heads on one side, and then Mr. Barker Pupp, looking straight at
+Tommy, sang the next verse:
+
+    _But the Butterfly so yellow,
+    Said, "O my, you silly fellow,"
+  And he laughed so loud he very nearly burst._
+
+
+Here the audience tittered, and pointed at Tommy.  The small Gollies
+and Teddies climbed on their papa's shoulders to see him, while Mr.
+Pupp sang loudly:
+
+  _Goodness gracious, don't you know it?
+  Why, your lesson books must show it--
+  You would have to be a CATERPILLAR first!_
+
+
+"Ladies and gentlemen, you will please sing the last line as a
+chorus," shouted Carlo, thumping on the piano.  And then they all
+began to sing as loudly and as fast as they could.  A perfect babel
+of voices arose, in what seemed a senseless mixture of words, and it
+sounded in the ears "of the children something like this:
+
+  _You would have to be a Caterpillar first.
+      A Caterpillar
+      Paterkiller
+      Lattertiller
+      Ratterlillar
+  You would have to be a Pillercater first.
+  You would have----_
+
+
+"I'm going to get out of this," said Tommy, scrambling through the
+crowd.  "It's a shame!  I never said that."
+
+"Said what?" asked Gladys, pushing after him with Freda following
+close behind.  "Who said you said anything?"
+
+But Tommy made his way to the edge of the crowd and began running
+along the promenade for his life.
+
+  _Paterkiller
+  Latterkiller
+  Ratterlillar_
+
+sang the Toys in chorus.
+
+"Good gracious, they're coming after us!" cried Freda.  "Run, Gladys!
+I'm afraid of them."
+
+Oh, how the children ran!  And behind them came the breathless
+panting crowd.  Gollies, Pollies, Teddies, Dogs, Cats, Rabbits and
+Dolls, all mixed up together, and everyone shouting the chorus of Mr.
+Barker Pupp's song at the top of his voice.
+
+Up the hill to the station sped Tommy; he burst in at the gate,
+passed the ticket collector like a shot, and got into the train.  He
+drew the blinds down and sat in the farthest corner.  Horrors!  The
+door handle turned, but to his great relief it was only Freda, Gladys
+and John James.
+
+"Just in time!" said the latter, mopping his forehead.  "I'm sure
+we're much obliged to you for reminding us that it was time to catch
+the train.  We might all have been left behind."
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+  They rolled and scrambled and snarled and bit.
+    Then the whistle blew, for the time was up,
+  And Kittens and Poodles were both hard hit--
+    But which of them won the Golliwog Cup?
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IV.
+
+AT THE FOOTBALL MATCH.
+
+There was great excitement in Golliwog football circles, for
+everybody was discussing the final match, between Poodleton and
+Kitten Town Tabbies, in the fight for the Golliwog Cup.
+
+The G. & T.B.R. were running special excursions from all parts and
+nearly everybody was going to see the match.
+
+You ought to have seen Tommy Stapleton's face when he heard the news.
+It was just like any other boy's face would have been if you had
+suddenly told him that Cats and Dogs played football--and that is
+what John James had just been saying.
+
+"You don't mean it," said Tommy.  "Football?  Not really?  Here,
+let's have a look at the league table."
+
+He seized _The Golliwog News_ and read it eagerly for a few minutes.
+In a very short space of time he could remember just how the clubs
+stood and could repeat them in their proper order with his eyes shut.
+
+"Here goes," he said: "Poodleton, Kitten Town, Frogland, Fish Town,
+Toy Town, Teddy Bear Rovers, Dolls House City."
+
+"How _ever_ do you remember them?" asked Freda.
+
+"Why, that's easy enough!" cried Tommy.  "I can remember that all
+right.  Lessons?  Not much!  They're different.  I say, John James,
+shall we take them to see the cup-tie?"
+
+John James had had a fit of the sulks, and so had Carlo.  The fact
+was that the former played for Dolls House City and had been badly
+beaten by the Poodleton and Kitten Town clubs.  As for Carlo, he was
+just dying to play for Poodleton, and, of course he couldn't, because
+he was not a Poodle!
+
+However, they both brightened up when they heard Tommy's suggestion,
+and the long and the short of it was, that the party of little folks
+in whom we are interested was found upon the grand stand at Dolls
+House City waiting for the match to begin.
+
+Gladys and Freda had never been on a football ground before and they
+thought what good fun it was.
+
+Two thousand Cats had come in by excursion train from Kitten Town,
+and most of them wore little red and white rosettes, the colours worn
+by the Tabbies.
+
+"Look at that funny Cat over there, with a red and white striped top
+hat on his head," said Gladys.
+
+Freda nearly shrieked, he looked so comical.
+
+He was turning round and round playing a concertina and cutting all
+sorts of silly capers.
+
+John James was holding his sides with laughter, and making a queer
+little gurgling noise in his throat.
+
+"My Golly always sees the funny side of things," said Gladys proudly.
+
+A crowd of friends had gathered round the Cat with the concertina,
+all singing and shouting and asking him wherever he got his hat.
+
+A little distance away another Pussy was playing a lively catty tune
+on a mouth organ, which made the listening crowd very merry indeed.
+
+The Poodles too had brought a large number of supporters with them
+from Poodleton, and they also wore the colours of their favourites,
+which were black and yellow.  One of them was actually wearing a suit
+striped all over with black and yellow.
+
+When he came in through the turnstiles he was greeted with roars of
+laughter from all sides.
+
+"It is more like a circus than a football match," said Gladys,
+glancing around.
+
+A brass band had been engaged specially from Frogland-in-the-Marshes
+and the bandsmen were grouped in a ring in the centre of the field
+playing all kinds of lively airs.
+
+There were about three thousand Teddy Bears all gathered together at
+one end of the field, and about the same number of Golliwogs at the
+other.  The two ends of the field were known as the Teddy Bear end
+and the Golliwog end, as they always congregated together in that way.
+
+There were also a great number of Hoppers and Jumpers present from
+Frogland and hundreds of Toys from Toy Town.
+
+"I wouldn't have missed this on any account," said Freda.  "I had no
+idea football was so amusing."
+
+Tommy then explained that they had not begun to play yet.
+
+Two minutes before the kick off, the Tabbies came on the field
+dressed in red and white jerseys and white knicker-bockers.
+
+"Here they come!" shouted Tommy, and everybody began to cheer.
+
+In another minute the Poodles in their black and yellow jerseys and
+white knickerbockers came trotting out wagging their tails.
+
+The cheering was again deafening, and it was very infectious too, for
+Gladys and Freda joined in.  How were they to help it when Tommy and
+the big Golly were cheering like mad?
+
+"What is that Teddy Bear with a whistle doing on the field?" asked
+Freda.  "He isn't going to play, is he?"
+
+John James chuckled: "That's the referee," he said.
+
+"Oh, look!" exclaimed Gladys.  "I can see a Pussy and a Poodle
+shaking paws.  What's that for?"
+
+Tommy explained that the two captains always shook paws before they
+began to play.
+
+"They'll spin a coin next for choice of ends," he continued.  "There
+it goes," he said.  "Head or tail?"
+
+[Illustration: "WASN'T THAT A FINE GOAL."]
+
+The Tabbies won, and chose to play towards the Golliwog end.  The
+teams lined up, the Teddy Bear blew his whistle and the players began
+kicking the ball about.  Or, at least, that was how it seemed to
+Gladys and Freda!
+
+Tommy explained that the Tabbies were trying to kick the ball between
+the posts at the Golliwog end.
+
+"Oh, I see," said Gladys, "and the Poodles are trying to stop them."
+
+"Yes, and to kick the ball between the posts at the Teddy Bear end,"
+he added, pleased to think that Gladys was beginning to understand
+the game.
+
+Freda looked puzzled.
+
+"Haven't they got enough to do to keep the Tabbies from getting the
+ball through at that end, without trying to get it through at the
+other end themselves?" she enquired.
+
+Poor Tommy began to look worried.  He said he did not know what sort
+of a game that would be, but it would not be football.
+
+After that Freda was very quiet for a time and Gladys did not like to
+ask questions.
+
+Still they enjoyed watching the game.  The way the Tabbies ran after
+the ball, and arched their backs when the Poodles made a dash for it,
+was so very funny that the little girls laughed more heartily than
+ever.
+
+There was a good deal of growling on the part of the Poodles, and the
+Teddy Bear referee often blew his whistle to give what Tommy called a
+foul.
+
+"That's a foul," he would say to Gladys.
+
+"Where?" she would return.  "I didn't see it.  Where is it?  What,
+another?  Well, I don't see it anywhere, neither does Freda."
+
+Then Tommy had to explain once more that it was not a "fowl" that was
+meant, but a "foul."
+
+"It sounds just the same," said Gladys.  "I'm sure I thought you were
+talking about a chicken."
+
+Tommy sighed at this remark and appeared deeply interested in the
+game.
+
+"The referee must be very tired with so much running about,"
+whispered Freda.
+
+And just at that moment the poor little Teddy got hit in the
+waistcoat with the ball, and rolling over like a ninepin he nearly
+swallowed his whistle.
+
+"Oh, wasn't that funny!" shrieked John James, who had been very quiet
+for some minutes.
+
+"Funny!" repeated Gladys sternly.  "I should think the poor thing is
+hurt.  It is much too dreadful to laugh at."
+
+He was not very much injured, however, for he soon got up and the
+game went on as merrily as ever.
+
+Whenever the Tabbies got the ball near the Golliwog end, the two
+thousand Pussies from Kitten Town would get very much excited and
+caterwaul for all they were worth.
+
+And when the Poodles looked like getting the ball through the Teddy
+Bear end, two thousand tails belonging to as many Poodles from
+Poodleton would start wagging.  And they would continue to wag until
+the ball went back to the other end of the field.  In fact, once or
+twice they nearly wagged the grand stand down.
+
+The game went on for about half an hour, then the players rested for
+a few minutes, while the Frogland brass band came out and paraded
+from one end of the field to the other, playing several martial airs.
+
+When the band got tired of that, the footballers came out to play
+again, at least, that was what Gladys and Freda thought.
+
+The sides had changed about and the Tabbies were kicking the ball
+towards the Teddy Bear end of the field.
+
+"Oh," thought Gladys to herself, "aren't they artful?  If they can't
+get it through at one end they mean to get it through at the other."
+
+The Poodles growled and worried away, and the Tabbies arched their
+backs with more vigour than before.  First a Puss would get rolled
+over, and then a Poodle, and their nice clean white knicker-bockers
+were beginning to get very dirty.
+
+Carlo barked in high glee when he saw a Pussy bowled over, and John
+James was highly amused when a Poodle and a Puss fell over each other.
+
+Several times each side came near to scoring a goal, and once a Tabby
+could easily have done it, only his tail got twisted round his legs,
+and when he tried to kick the ball he went tumbling head over heels.
+
+The Teddy referee got quite hot racing about, and he borrowed a large
+handkerchief from a Golliwog policeman to mop his face with.  And the
+policeman held his whistle the while!
+
+"Oh," cried Gladys, "do look!  If he isn't having a blow with it!"
+
+Sure enough, the silly policeman was blowing himself quite fat in the
+face, and the players all thought the match was finished.
+
+But the referee took a watch from his pocket and looked at it, and
+then told them they had another five minutes to play.
+
+So they all went at it again very hard, and a Poodle stopped the ball
+with his head.  The ball rolled away and the Poodle ran round in a
+circle in a ridiculous kind of way and then lay flat on his back with
+his four legs sticking in the air.
+
+The other players, Tabbies and Poodles alike, all gathered round him
+and after a time they stood him on his legs.  He was only a bit
+stunned, however, and was soon able to play again.
+
+The Tabbies were a sturdy lot of players and had been in special
+training at the seaside.  They scampered about and played all sorts
+of tricks on the Poodles, until at last one of the Dogs lost his
+temper and bit at a Pussy's tail!
+
+There were loud cries all round the field: "Turn him off."  And the
+assembly of strange animals and toys became very angry.  The referee
+had the two offenders up together and cautioned them, for he knew
+very well that the Tabby must have done something too.
+
+"I saw him scratch the Poodle," said Freda.  "He did it before, and I
+thought it was part of the game."
+
+It seemed as if neither side would be able to score a goal, but at
+last the Poodles got one.  It was just two minutes before the end of
+the game and everybody howled with delight--except, perhaps, the two
+thousand Cats from Kitten Town.  The air was thick with hats and the
+multitude of strange noises was so deafening it must have been heard
+a mile away!
+
+Gladys and Freda, Tommy and the big Golliwog all stood on their seats
+and waved their hats in the air as madly as the rest of them.
+
+"Wasn't that a fine goal!" they were all saying.
+
+And there were cries of "Play up, my little Poodles!" from several of
+the admirers of the Doggies in black and Yellow.
+
+All the Poodles who were playing ran to shake paws with the one who
+scored the goal.  He was very good looking for a Poodle and wore a
+smart blue bow on his tail.
+
+He was greeted with shouts of "Pretty boy!" from all round the ground.
+
+There was no more scoring after that.  The Tabbies quite lost their
+tempers and played like mad things, biting and scratching for all
+they were worth.
+
+After the match was over the Frogland brass band paraded through the
+streets of Dolls House City playing "See the Conquering Hero Comes."
+In front of them marched a very solemn looking Froggie carrying on
+his shoulder a large board on which was chalked
+
+  POODLETON . . . . . . . 1
+  KITTEN TOWN TABBIES . . 3
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+  We hear the views of Henry Toad,
+    Of Dolls, and Cats and Dogs,
+  And angry shouting in the road
+    Of "Votes for Pollywogs."
+  While Mortimer turns out to be,
+  A very popular M.P.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER V.
+
+THE DOLLS PARLIAMENT.
+
+It had been a very dull dark day, and the children scarcely knew how
+to amuse themselves.  Gladys got all her toys out of the cupboard,
+and having arranged them in a row against the wall, proceeded to give
+each of them a scolding.
+
+She slapped Adeliza May, and reproved her for vanity.  She told the
+Billikins that he looked like a lunatic, and when she reached
+Mortimer Max, who was third in the row, (John James being the
+fourth), she smacked him on the head, and said he was looking
+defiant, and she would have no more nonsense from him.
+
+"It's too bad of you, Gladys!" cried Freda, the tender-hearted.
+
+"Go it, Gladys!" said Tommy, and he got out his pea-shooter, and
+began to shoot at Mortimer Max and the Billikins.
+
+"Mind your own business, both of you!" said Gladys shortly; and no
+one knows what might have happened next if the situation had not been
+relieved by the entrance of a Teddy telegraph boy, with a telegram.
+
+Gladys advanced to take the orange coloured envelope from him, but
+the messenger took no notice of her.  He handed the telegram briskly
+to John James.
+
+This was a bitter disappointment to Gladys.  She had never had a
+telegram in her life, and she had felt so sure that this one was for
+her.  Then she laughed and thought how very extraordinary everything
+seemed.  She did not remember ever seeing a Teddy telegraph boy
+before, and this one was such a funny little fellow.  His hat was
+perched on one side and he carried himself as though he were the most
+important person in Golliwogland.
+
+His uniform was very smart and clean and was trimmed with red braid.
+It was so exceedingly clean, that it occurred to Gladys he could not
+have been a telegraph boy very long; at any rate, he seemed very
+proud of his position, and while he was waiting to see if there
+happened to be an answer, he confided to Tommy that his one ambition
+in life was to become a postman.
+
+John James tore open the envelope with a very grubby thumb.
+
+"I don't suppose it is a real telegram," said Gladys tossing her head.
+
+John James trembled just a little, for it flashed across his mind
+that perhaps his great-grandmother, who had lately celebrated her
+hundredth birthday, might have taken chicken-pox, or something like
+that.
+
+However, he heaved a sigh of relief when he read the message; with a
+wave of his hand he dismissed the messenger, and handed the telegram
+to Gladys.  Tommy and Freda rushed to peep over her shoulder, and
+this is what they read:
+
+"_Don't forget to attend Dolls' Parliament to-night at six._"
+
+"That's from the Prime Minister," said John James grandly.
+
+"Isn't that splendid?" cried the children, clapping their hands.  "Of
+course we are coming too."
+
+"Then we had better go at once," returned the Golliwog, and they all
+trooped after him, shouting with joy.
+
+"The Speaker takes the chair in half an hour," remarked John James,
+"so we had better get a car."
+
+They noticed then for the first time that little electric cars were
+running in all directions.  There was one very queer Teddy Bear
+driver who drove his car along at a great rate, and rang his gong as
+loudly as he could, on purpose to scare the old and infirm Toys.
+
+It was funny to see an elephant on crutches, jumping out of the way,
+and the children laughed very much, when, on being nearly run over,
+he dropped his crutches and ran away quite briskly without them.
+
+Then the conductor who punched their tickets for them was a very
+nice-looking Teddy, and as straight as a Tin Soldier.  He was very
+polite too; in fact, so polite that he omitted to take their fares,
+and when they mentioned it, he said it didn't matter at all.
+
+They soon reached the Parliament House, which was a very big
+building, and on one huge square tower there was a clock, which now
+said five minutes to six.
+
+Several Golliwog policemen were guarding the entrance, and a large
+crowd of Toys stood there cheering the various M.P.'s as they
+arrived; and then just as our friends, piloted by John James, were
+about to cross the road, a taxi drove up, and there was much
+cheering, and cries of "The Prime Minister."
+
+At that precise moment, a Pollywog rushed into the middle of the
+road.  Gladys and Freda clutched John James, one on each side and
+shrieked:
+
+"She'll be run over!--yes, she will."
+
+"Run in, you mean," said the policeman who stood near them, and he
+darted after her.
+
+Meanwhile, the Pollywog had stopped exactly in front of the taxi, and
+dragging from under her cloak a green and violet flag, she waved it
+in the Prime Minister's face as he alighted, and shouted:
+
+  "Votes for Pollywogs."
+
+
+A furious cry went up from the Teddy Bears and the Golliwogs standing
+near; then the policeman seized her by the shoulder, pulled her away,
+and the astonished Prime Minister was able to enter the House.
+
+The Pollywog, who was now infuriated, struggled and fought with the
+policeman who was trying to arrest her.  She managed to bite him so
+hard that three or four other constables had to come to his
+assistance, and eventually she was carried away shrieking "Votes for
+Pollywogs" at the very top of her voice.
+
+[Illustration: "THE BAGPIPES WERE PLAYED BY A FLAMINGO DRESSED IN A
+KILT AND WEARING A TAM-O-SHANTER."]
+
+Gladys and Freda were very much excited about the affair, though they
+hardly knew what to make of it.  They wanted to know what would
+become of the Pollywog, and whether the policeman would take the
+green and violet flag away from her.
+
+"Don't bother about her now," said John James, leading the way into
+the House.  "We shall have trouble to get you in after this, you see
+if we don't."
+
+And he was right.  The policeman at the door did not want to allow
+Gladys and Freda to pass, and made a lot of enquiries to see if they
+belonged to the "Votes for Pollywogs" people.  John James assured
+them that all was right, and after some conversation, and a
+gingerbread pressed into each policeman's hand, they were let in, and
+John James conducted them to the place where the reporters sat.
+
+Naturally the other reporters were very much surprised to see John
+James accompanied by Tommy and the little girls, and a good deal of
+whispering went on.  A very fat doll wanted to know whether the
+ladies would mind if he took his collar off, as he could always work
+better without it.  The children stared at him gravely for a minute,
+then they began to look round the House.
+
+It was the queerest place they had ever seen.  All along one side of
+the building a large number of particularly intelligent Pussies were
+seated.  Facing them were the Doggie Benches, while at one end there
+were quite a lot of Frogs, in stand-up collars and starched cuffs.
+There were Teddy Bears and Dolls, in short, every Toy was
+represented--except the Pollywog!
+
+The business of the evening soon began, and then the reporters
+scribbled as if their very lives depended on it--and perhaps they
+did!  The Fat Doll nearly rolled off his seat, and one of his friends
+took hold of him by a string that was round his waist and hauled him
+up again; but what struck the children as very strange was that he
+said "Papa" and "Mamma" very fast, until the other fellow let go.
+
+The Bill being considered was The Nursing of Dolls Bill, brought in
+by the Keeper of the Money-Box, and there was to be the final
+division on it that night.
+
+Tommy heard the Fat Doll say that it was likely to be an all-night
+sitting, and that he had brought a packet of acid drops with him.  He
+passed them round and John James sucked one critically.
+
+"I hope it is an all-night sitting," whispered Tommy to the little
+girls.
+
+"It strikes me we are going to see some fun.  But who on earth is the
+Keeper of the Money-Box?"
+
+"Hush--sh!" said John James "He is the Gollywog who makes us all pay
+taxes, and he has his work cut out too, poor chap.  You should just
+see how some of them are fighting this Nursing of Dolls Bill."
+
+"Which side are you on, John James?" asked Gladys curiously--"you
+like being nursed, don't you?"
+
+But the Golliwog would not say.  He remarked that his politics were
+his own affair, and that an important paper like _The Golliwog News_
+could not be too careful.  There was no time to press the subject
+further, for the debate began.
+
+The first to address the House was the member for East
+Frogland--Henry Toad, Esq.
+
+He spoke very strongly against the Bill; asking in an angry tone why
+the House was always passing Bills for the benefit of Dolls.  Was it
+not time they did something for the relief of other classes?--namely,
+the Froggies.  (Murmurs of approval from the Froggie benches).
+
+He proceeded to draw a moving picture of helpless Frogs being chased
+and stoned by boys.  (".Shame.")  "But that is not the worst," he
+said with a loud croak.  "Why, in some parts, we are subjected to the
+most cruel and horrible torture imaginable, cut up in slices and
+eaten--actually eaten."  (Sensation).
+
+"I shall take hops shortly," said Mr. Toad, as he resumed his seat,
+"to bring before this House a measure which will provide a larger
+amount of protection for my kith and kin."  (Loud Froggie croaks).
+
+Gladys felt so much interested in what was passing, that she scarcely
+had time to notice John James.  Now she glanced over her shoulder and
+saw that he was scribbling notes as quickly as ever he could.  She
+smiled proudly to herself as she remembered that every word Mr. Toad
+had said, would be in the paper the following morning.
+
+The next speaker was the member for Kitten Town--Mr. Thomas Purr-Catt.
+
+"Look!  Look!" cried Freda in a loud whisper.  "That is the very Cat
+we saw on our way to Toy Town.  Look!  He's putting up his eye-glass."
+
+"Shut up!" said Tommy sternly, putting his hand over her mouth.
+"They'll think you're a Pollywog."
+
+Mr. Thomas Purr-Catt was in favour of the Bill, and thought that
+Dolls were really nursed too much (hear, hear).  He would be glad,
+however, if the Keeper of the Money-Box could see his way to include
+Kittens in the Bill.  (Loud me-ows from the Catty side of the House).
+They were nursed quite as much as Dolls were, and some reform was
+needed in that direction.  His party, however, would be satisfied
+with the Bill as it stood, for they regarded it as a step in the
+right direction.  (General noises from all sides of the House.)
+
+The member for the central division of Dolls House City was greeted
+with loud applause as he rose to address the House, but Gladys opened
+her eyes very widely, and nearly fell off her chair when she saw who
+it was that they were making such a fuss about.
+
+It was actually Mortimer Max!  He had taken his wig off, and was
+dressed like an ordinary person, that was why she had not recognised
+him before.  She stood up, and was going to call out to him, when
+Tommy seized her arm.
+
+"You girls oughtn't to have come," he said impatiently.  "Talk about
+the Pollywogs, you're much worse.  If you are not careful the whole
+crowd will attack us."
+
+Gladys sat down again.  She hardly knew what to make of it.  She had
+had no idea that Mortimer Max was an M.P. and was really very much
+astonished.  Why had he never told her?  She made up her mind to tell
+him what she thought when she got him alone again.  However, she had
+no time to think of that now, for Mortimer Max had begun to speak and
+she badly wanted to hear what he had to say.
+
+Mortimer Max said he never saw the advent of a Bill with greater
+pleasure than the one under discussion.  The length of time some
+dolls were nursed was a disgrace.  It was high time this particular
+injustice was removed.  It was not only in the matter of nursing, but
+in the general treatment they received.
+
+"In my own case," said Mortimer sadly, "I am often smacked on the
+head by my mistress, Miss Gladys."  (Laughter, and cries of "Shame.")
+
+Gladys, who had been greatly shocked at the sentiments expressed by
+her dear Mortimer, flushed scarlet at this remark.  It seemed as if
+all eyes in the House were directed towards her, and she felt hot and
+cold by turns.  She glanced uneasily at John James.  He was
+scribbling fast!
+
+"Yes," proceeded the member for the central division of Dolls House
+City, warming to his subject, "I frequently get smacked and pinched
+for no earthly reason.  She calls me Naughty Morty, when I haven't
+done anything at all, and of course I don't like it."
+
+"Oh, you wicked thing!" groaned Gladys.  "Won't I give it to you!"
+
+"But that is not the worst," continued Mortimer, while the House
+listened with rapt attention, "I don't mind what she does to me very
+much, but when she ill-treats my sister, Adeliza May, it makes my
+sawdust go all of a shiver."
+
+"I don't ever ill-treat her!" shrieked Gladys, but no one seemed to
+hear her.  Only the reporters scribbled faster than ever.
+
+"Adeliza May is a very pretty Doll," went on Mortimer, "and the other
+day a young boy, named Tommy Stapleton, who comes to have tea with
+Miss Gladys sometimes, tried to poke one of her eyes out with a
+knitting needle.  He also shot at me, and at a very intelligent
+Billikins, with a pea-shooter."  (Sensation).
+
+It was now Tommy's turn to feel small, and he shook his fist at
+Mortimer Max.
+
+"But you did do it, Tommy," whispered Freda at his side.
+
+"Do you call that fair treatment?" shouted Mortimer, hammering on the
+table with his fist.  (Wild cries of "No!")
+
+"I tell you," thundered Mortimer, "that thousands of Dolls are being
+maimed for life every year, and this wholesale butchery must be
+stopped."  (Cheers.)
+
+"Even where there is no direct cruelty, the nursing so many Dolls get
+coddles them up and makes them good for nothing.  Their constitutions
+must become weakened and we know very well that it is all U.P. with a
+Doll who gets measles or whooping cough.  This Bill must become law,
+if the future generations of Dolls are to grow up worthy members of
+that illustrious race, a race, I repeat--aye, am proud to repeat,--a
+race of which I am a member!"
+
+Mortimer Max sat down, and nearly everybody in the House stood up,
+shouting and waving his hat in the air.
+
+John James, the Fat Doll, and the other reporters were writing for
+their very lives, and even Gladys could not help feeling pleased that
+Mortimer seemed so popular.  After John James he was her favorite Toy.
+
+When the noise had subsided, Mr. William Dogg, a very cross looking
+bull-pup, who sat for West Dogton, rose to speak.
+
+Mr. Dogg said he considered the Bill a great mistake.  If anyone had
+a Doll, he had a perfect right to do what he liked with it.  He, for
+one, had no patience with the grandmotherly tendencies shown by the
+Keeper of the Money-Box.
+
+"At any rate," he said, "if the two hours limit is passed, there
+will, perhaps, be a good deal more time for Dolls to be worried in
+other ways."
+
+Here Mr. Dogg showed all his teeth and snapped at a fly.
+
+There were loud cries of anger, and members everywhere rose in their
+seats, and made noises at the bull-pup.
+
+The Speaker called "Order," but his voice was scarcely heard above
+the din.
+
+The Prime Minister then tried to address the House, but it was not
+the slightest use--the noise was deafening.  The children put their
+fingers in their ears, but they could not keep it out.
+
+Several Dolls and one or two prominent Cats, made an attempt to seize
+the member for West Dogton, while a number of Doggies--and Carlo was
+among them--came to the assistance of their leader, and the children
+thought matters would end up in a free fight.
+
+"I wish we had never come," wailed Freda.
+
+"So do I," said Gladys, tugging at John James' arm to attract his
+attention.
+
+"It's all right--it's all right," said John James hastily; "this sort
+of thing often happens."
+
+Tommy felt dubious about that, and the girls were really frightened,
+but as the Fat Doll and all the pressmen were laughing, and seizing
+this opportunity of cracking up acid drops, they thought perhaps
+nobody would get killed after all.
+
+Cries of "Withdraw!" were shouted, and at length the bull-pup
+consented to withdraw what he had said, and then everybody returned
+to his place.
+
+When the division was called it was very amusing to see the various
+M.P.'s voting on the Bill.  Some of the Froggies voted for it, and
+rubbed shoulders with Mortimer Max and his party, who had gone solid
+for the Bill.  The Teddies and Golliwogs were nearly all for it, but
+a few did not vote at all.
+
+When the result was announced, showing a majority of seventy-nine for
+the Bill, the air was rent with the queerest set of noises the
+children had ever heard in their lives, for everyone seemed greatly
+excited about it.
+
+The big clock on the tower now struck three, and they all began to
+talk about going home.
+
+"It's cold," said Freda with chattering teeth, as they went down the
+steps; then she laughed, for the Fat Doll pushed past them, with his
+collar in his hand and his necktie wound round his throat like a
+bandage.
+
+"Papa"--"Mamma," he cried, as he jostled through the crowd.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI
+
+  "Tis not for me to flaunt and boast
+  That I have never left my post."
+  The Scarecrow coughed,--a gentle hint,
+  For more of Freda's peppermint.
+  Then read how once a cruel blast
+  Had hurled him from his post at last.
+  And how Sir Hawk so swiftly flew
+  To summon twelve good crows and true.
+  And how, quite suddenly that day,
+  They every one were "scared" away.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VI.
+
+THE SCARECROW.
+
+Tommy was tired of his tin soldiers.  He had been having a very
+exciting battle in the parlour, and was quite worn out with it.
+Also, he had managed to break a valuable vase, and his mother had
+said that she really could not have such rough games played in the
+house any more.
+
+Tommy was very sorry that he had hit the vase with his pea-shooter,
+but he felt it to be against his dignity to be found fault with, so
+he piled his toys away, and ran over the road to play with Gladys.
+On the way, he met Freda Morris starting out on the same errand, and
+she told him a strange story about a Scarecrow that was in one of her
+father's fields.
+
+"He is dressed just like a real person," said Freda, "only his
+clothes are rather old.  I have seen him in that field ever since I
+can remember.  But yesterday, Tommy,"--Freda dropped her voice to a
+mysterious whisper--"yesterday, as I was getting over the stile near
+Long Meadow, I heard him coughing, I did really."
+
+"Go on!" said Tommy incredulously.
+
+"Well, I did," repeated Freda.  "But I didn't like to speak to him."
+
+"Well, never mind him now," said Tommy.  "Let's go and play with
+Gladys, at hunting on the prairie."
+
+Freda agreed, and they very quickly found Gladys.  She was in the
+nursery making a new hat for Adeliza May, but she left off at once
+and found some peacocks' feathers to stick in her hair, because Tommy
+said she was to be a Red Indian prowling about after deer, and he and
+Freda would be two Englishmen hunting buffaloes, and they must shoot
+at her because she was stealing.
+
+They had a very exciting game.  The two Englishmen shot the Red
+Indian with a walking stick, and he fell over on the hearth-rug
+terribly wounded.  Then suddenly he rose and scalped the Englishmen,
+and chased them under the sofa, where they lay panting for breath.
+After a time, however, and a great deal of strange talking, which
+Gladys said was Red Indian, they all became friendly and decided to
+light a fire and smoke the pipe of peace.
+
+So to begin with, Tommy tried to strike a match on his boot, as he
+had sometimes seen other boys do.  But as it would not light, he
+threw it away, and forgot all about it till there was a great fizz
+inside the dolls' house, where the match had fallen, and a tiny flame
+burst out of the kitchen window.
+
+"Oh, dear!" cried Gladys, "the dolls' house is on fire, and Adeliza
+May is inside with her best frock on.  Water!  Where is some water?"
+
+She ran out of the room and fetched the jug from her washstand, and
+Tommy tipped it over the dolls' house.  The water ran all over the
+floor, and through the ceiling into the kitchen, where Jane was
+talking to the cook, and that is how she guessed that something was
+the matter and came rushing up to see what it was.
+
+"Well, Miss Gladys and Miss Freda!  Well, Master Thomas!" she cried,
+when she saw what had taken place.  "I wouldn't have believed that
+two young ladies and a young gentleman could do such depredations,
+and Cook and me so busy we don't know what to do first."
+
+"It was an accident," said Gladys meekly.  "Shall I help you wipe it
+up?  I am very sorry."
+
+But Jane was not to be pacified.
+
+"You'd better go out for a walk," she said crossly, "while I get the
+place straight again.  Oh, my goodness!"
+
+So the three children stole down into the garden thinking it would be
+nicer to have a romp there than to stay with Jane and that fearful
+mess on the floor.
+
+"What was that you were telling me about the Scarecrow?" said Tommy
+to Freda as they hurried along.
+
+"Oh!" cried Freda, "couldn't we go and see him now--this very minute?
+The Scarecrow, Gladys, in my daddy's field.  Yesterday I heard him
+coughing.  I've got a few peppermints in my pocket--shall we go and
+give him one?"
+
+"Yes, of course," said Gladys, very pleased at the idea.  "Here's
+John James, let him come too if he will."
+
+John James was very willing to accompany them, so Gladys picked him
+up, and off scampered the merry trio, until they reached the
+forlorn-looking object.
+
+"You speak first," said Tommy giving Freda a push.
+
+"No, no.  Let Gladys," replied Freda timidly.
+
+So Gladys cleared her throat.
+
+"Good morning, Mr. Scarecrow," she said.
+
+"Good morning, ma'am," the old fellow replied in a quavering voice.
+
+Gladys felt very proud at being called ma'am.
+
+"Take a chair," he went on--"I mean, won't you sit down?"
+
+The children sat down on the trunk of a tree and surveyed the
+Scarecrow from head to foot.  He had on a hat with a dent in the top,
+rather a good coat, but his trousers were frayed at the ankles, and
+he had only one leg; indeed, it seemed to be a very difficult matter
+for him to stand up at all.  Certainly the poor old chap was
+wheezing, and he had a very bad cough.
+
+"On my chest," he said to Freda, when she offered him a peppermint.
+
+"You ought not to be out in this cold wind," said Gladys.
+
+"No, indeed," he replied, "I am past the job now.  The birds get
+mortal cheeky!"  Here the Scarecrow was seized with a violent fit of
+coughing, which continued until Gladys patted him on the back.
+
+"Mortal cheeky!" he resumed.  "Just before you came I tried to scare
+a Robin, but he took no notice of me at all.  He told me he would
+come next Spring and build a nest in my hat.  That is the biggest
+piece of impudence I've ever had to put up with.  Scare-crowing is
+most certainly not the profession it used to be."
+
+John James, who had been listening very attentively, now found his
+voice.
+
+"This will make good copy for the _News_," he said, taking his note
+book out of his pocket.  "Perhaps you will tell us something more
+about yourself?"
+
+The Scarecrow seemed a bit doubtful.
+
+"What paper do you represent," he enquired cautiously.
+
+"I am the Editor of _The Golliwog News_," said John James proudly.
+
+"Really!" cried the Scarecrow, his thin face lighting up with
+pleasure.  "That's a very respectable paper, and I have no objection
+to telling you a little,--but mind you, I wouldn't give any
+information to some of the other papers, not if you'd give me a new
+hat!"
+
+"When did you first take to scarecrowing?" asked John James.
+
+"I've been in the business ever since I can remember.  In fact, I
+have been told that I am a born Scarecrow.  My father was a Scarecrow
+before me, so it may be hereditary.
+
+"He was a good father to me," continued the Scarecrow his eyes
+filling with tears at the remembrance of his aged parent.  "Never let
+me lark about with other scarecrows of my age, always kept me
+strictly to business.  He caught a chill one bitter night, and became
+very ill, but, would he leave his post?"
+
+The Scarecrow looked round fiercely as if he hoped someone might
+contradict him.  "Would he leave his post?" he repeated severely, and
+looked at the children so hard that Freda felt she ought to say
+something, especially as this was her father's field.
+
+"I don't suppose he would?" she ventured.
+
+"Not he," snapped the Scarecrow, "and what is more, no member of our
+family ever has left his post."
+
+"Perhaps you would tell us how you came to lose your leg!" asked John
+James trying to change the conversation.
+
+"That was a great blow to me," said the Scarecrow sorrowfully.  "It
+was the beginning of the end, for I shall not last much longer now.
+I used to be as strong and hearty a Scarecrow as you would find in a
+day's march, now I am eaten up with rheumatism, and find it a hard
+matter to stand out here in these rough winds at all.  They are
+almost enough to blow one off one's legs--I mean one's leg.
+
+"Well, one day there were a number of pigeons stealing the corn quite
+close to me.  I had been awake nearly all night, and was just having
+a snooze, so didn't know they were there, when--_bang!_ I woke with a
+start and a stinging pain in my leg, and there stood Mr. Morris with
+a smoking gun in his hand.  In firing at the thieves he had
+accidently shot me in the leg.  I was removed to the Wood Limbo
+Hospital, where it was found necessary to amputate the limb above the
+knee.
+
+"It was rather hard on me," he continued after a pause.  "I lost a
+leg, but down at the house they had pigeon pie."
+
+"I am sure father would be sorry if he knew," began Freda, but the
+Scarecrow did not hear her; he was clearing his voice by giving a
+series of tremendous "Ahems."
+
+"Too much talking makes me worse," he gasped.
+
+"Then I think we had better go now," said Gladys, "and we will come
+and see you again soon.  You have talked quite enough for the
+present."
+
+A whole week went by, and the children had apparently forgotten all
+about their visit to the Scarecrow, but they were suddenly reminded
+by John James.  He had been lying on the sofa, with his legs sticking
+in the air.  A very undignified attitude--so the children
+thought--for the Editor of _The Golliwog News_.  While they were
+watching him, he got on his feet and began to rub his eyes.
+
+"Silly old thing, pretending you have been asleep," said Gladys
+scornfully.
+
+John James frowned.
+
+"I've got an inquest to attend at three o'clock," he said.
+
+"Well, it's after three now," Gladys told him.
+
+"I'm off, then," he shouted, rushing out of the room.
+
+Of course they all followed him, tearing along like mad things, while
+John James led the way to Farmer Morris' field.
+
+"We're in time," he gasped breathlessly, as they reached the large
+wooden gate.
+
+"They are just swearing in the jury."
+
+Our young friends were all eyes at once.  They looked across and saw
+the poor old Scarecrow was lying on the ground, and twelve black
+crows, forming the jury, were arranged in a ring round him.  When
+they reached the spot the foreman had just been elected, and the
+Coroner, a wise-looking old Hawk, was perched on a tree stump where
+he could keep his eye on the prostrate Scarecrow.  The children
+hastily found seats just behind the jury, where they could get a
+splendid view of the whole proceedings.
+
+The first witness called was Mr. Peter Bunney, who nodded and smiled
+at Gladys.  He had first discovered the death of the Scarecrow.  He
+said he was crossing the field late on the previous night, on his way
+to a cabbage patch on the other side, when he thought he heard
+singing.  Believing it to be some friends of his returning from a
+little party, witness went nearer, and on putting up his ear-trumpet,
+discovered that the sound he had heard was the Scarecrow's violent
+coughing.
+
+The poor old fellow's hat, Mr. Peter Bunney proceeded to state, was
+blown off by a gust of wind.  Witness attempted to chase it, but
+without success.  Then another blast of wind, more furious than the
+last, bowled the Scarecrow completely over.  He made no effort to
+rise, and witness, after trying hard to assist him, placed his
+ear-trumpet near the Scarecrow's heart and listened intently.  He
+could hear no sound and was therefore forced to the conclusion that
+their friend had breathed his last.
+
+The next witness was Mr. Robin, who said he had spent a great deal of
+time in the vicinity of the Scarecrow during the last few days, and
+that he was not surprised to find the old chap "off his perch" that
+morning.  He had had frequent conversations with the Scarecrow and
+noticed that he had lately become very "touchy," which witness
+attributed to advancing age.
+
+Questioned by the Coroner, Mr. Robin admitted threatening to build a
+nest in the Scarecrow's hat, but explained that he had no serious
+intention of doing so, because his wife was terribly afraid of
+deceased and would on no account go near him.
+
+"Did he appear alarmed by your remark?" asked the foreman of the jury.
+
+"He did," replied the Robin, "but as I considered him feeble-minded I
+thought no more about it."
+
+Doctor Drake then said that in his opinion deceased had been
+suffering from the "flu."  He ought not to have been out on such a
+night as that upon which he met his death, but it was common
+knowledge that these Scarecrows were very much devoted to their
+employers, and could on no account be prevailed upon to leave their
+posts.
+
+The jury then retired to a corner of the field to consider their
+verdict.  It took them a very long time, and the children had begun
+to fidget a little.  Tommy had screwed up his mouth ready to whistle,
+when quite suddenly he unscrewed it.
+
+He nudged Gladys and Freda, who were sitting on either side of him.
+
+"Look at the Scarecrow," he whispered.
+
+The little girls did so, and to their intense surprise they
+distinctly saw him wink.  There could be no mistake about it, for
+while they were still looking, he did it again.
+
+"I don't believe he's dead at all," said Gladys softly.
+
+"He's as right as ninepence, the artful old beggar!" said Tommy, and
+he was about to attract the attention of the Coroner, when the
+Scarecrow frowned, and shook his head, as if entreating him to be
+silent.
+
+In a few minutes the jury returned in a talkative and jovial mood.
+One of them hummed a little tune, and looked contemptuously at the
+prostrate figure.  Evidently they were all very pleased to think that
+they were now free to come and go in Farmer Morris' field just as
+much as they liked.
+
+"Now we shall see some fun," remarked Tommy, as the foreman of the
+jury rose to deliver the verdict.
+
+"We rejoice to find," he began, giving the Scarecrow a vicious little
+peck, "that our deceased--er--friend----"
+
+But he got no further, for suddenly the Scarecrow rose, stood on his
+leg, and surveyed the Coroner and jury with a solemn eye.
+
+For a moment they were too much amazed to move.  Then, with a
+tremendous flutter, and a series of terrified squawks, they all flew
+away, without leaving so much as a feather behind them.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII.
+
+  Relates how naughty Spottikins
+    Had caught a cheeky Sparrow,
+  Who told some very wondrous tales,
+    About a bow and arrow.
+  How Gladys, Tom, and Freda liked
+    His stories gay and witty,
+  So on the G. and T.B.R.
+    They went to Birdland City.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VII.
+
+BIRDLAND CITY.
+
+"You are a wicked, cruel cat!" shrieked Gladys, breathlessly, chasing
+Spottikins round and round the garden, and in and out amongst the
+gooseberry bushes.
+
+"A nasty, vicious, greedy horrid thing, to catch a poor little bird,
+and then purr as if you'd done something clever!  Oh--oh--I've got
+you at last!"
+
+She thumped Spottikins on the back, till she opened her mouth and a
+small brown bird fell out of it.
+
+Spottikins spat at Gladys--she really did.  And then she walked off
+with her fur bristling and her tail in the air, while Gladys picked
+up the poor little Sparrow and took him into the nursery.
+
+She made him a bed with an old shawl, and stroked his soft throat,
+for it was wet where Spottikins had held him.
+
+"She nearly choked the breath out of you," said Gladys, touching one
+tiny claw.  "And how dreadfully afraid you must have been!--What?"
+
+She started back, for the claw suddenly fastened round her finger,
+and the little bird perched himself on her wrist.  He looked at her
+sideways with his bright little eyes.
+
+"I'm not afraid of anything," he chirped, and he began to preen his
+feathers.
+
+"Not afraid of anything?" repeated Gladys.
+
+"No," continued the Sparrow.  "It doesn't do to be afraid.  Why, I
+get pecked to death every night of my life," he said with emphasis,
+gazing at Gladys the while in order to see what effect his words had
+upon her.
+
+"Pecked to death every night of life!" repeated Gladys.  "That's
+silly.  You couldn't be."
+
+The Sparrow chuckled wickedly.
+
+"I was last night, anyway," he said.  Gladys looked at him severely
+for a moment or two, then she said:
+
+"That's worse than silly.  It's not true.  Because if you had been
+pecked to death, you wouldn't be alive now, would he, Freda?"
+
+"Of course not," said Freda gravely.  "You would be dead, you see."
+
+"Oh, but I shouldn't," argued the Sparrow.
+
+"Yes, you would," answered Gladys.
+
+"I shouldn't."
+
+"You would."
+
+"Shouldn't."
+
+Gladys was getting angry, when Tommy came bounding into the room.
+Immediately she appealed to him.
+
+"Tommy, if a--a--person, I mean a bird,--got pecked to death,
+wouldn't he be dead now?"
+
+"That's easy," said Tommy.  "Of course he would.  Why?"
+
+"Well, this sparrow says he gets pecked to death every night and yet
+he isn't dead."
+
+Tommy surveyed the Sparrow with interest.
+
+"I say, that's a little too tall," he remarked.
+
+The Sparrow, who had now finished preening his feathers, began to
+laugh in an aggravating manner.
+
+"Well," he said at last between his chuckles, "I'm an actor, and
+that's my part, you know.  I'm the villain, and they peck me to
+death.  See?"
+
+"Why couldn't you say so before," said Gladys crossly, "instead of
+talking in that silly way.  I wish Spottikins had eaten you.  Yes, I
+do."
+
+"Here, shut up!" whispered Tommy in her ear.  "Perhaps he will tell
+us something about the play and all that, you know."
+
+Then aloud to the Sparrow, he said:
+
+"We should very much like to see you act your part.  Will you tell us
+where you are appearing just now?"
+
+"Why, don't you know?" asked the Sparrow.  "At the Hall-in-the-Wood,
+of course, the most magnificent edifice in Birdland City, and we get
+a full house every night, now that Cock Robin is on."
+
+"Cock Robin, is it?" cried Freda.  "Oh, how I should like to see him!
+Robins are such dear little birds."
+
+"I can't say I care much for this one," said the Sparrow trying to
+reach a ruffle at the very back of his neck.  "He's such a proud
+little beggar, and gives himself dreadful airs, just because they
+applaud so when he comes on the stage."
+
+"How far is it to Birdland City?" asked Tommy in a business-like
+voice.
+
+"As far again as a half," replied the Sparrow, hopping to the window
+sill.
+
+"Oh, stop!--do stop just a minute!" cried Gladys suddenly.  "I
+rescued you from Spottikins, you know I did.  Won't you tell us how
+we can get to the Hall-in-the-Wood?"
+
+"Can't stop.  Rehearsal at twelve.  Here, you can have these; come,
+if you can," and out flew the Sparrow through the window, while the
+children gazed after him open-mouthed.
+
+Tommy was the first to recover himself.
+
+"He threw something on the floor," he said, stooping to see what it
+was.
+
+"Why, it's three tickets for the play to-night!" exclaimed Freda.
+"Look, Gladys, front seats too."
+
+She held up three brown leaves, which had printed on them:
+
+  HALL-IN-THE-WOOD.
+  WHO KILLED COCK ROBIN?
+
+  To-night at eight.
+  Front Seats.  Early Doors.
+
+
+"We must go," cried Gladys.  "Where's John James?"
+
+"Here I am," replied the Golliwog, "What is it?  Where are you going?"
+
+"To Birdland City to see Cock Robin.  Do you know the way, John
+James?  Oh, dear, we haven't got a ticket for you.  What ever shall
+we do?"
+
+John James grinned.
+
+"I can get in without one," he said.  "They'll be only too glad to
+get a notice in the _News_.  And I'll tell you what, we might get
+there early, and I'll go round to the back and interview Cock Robin,
+and a few of 'em while they're making up."
+
+"Oh, John James, how splendid!" cried Gladys, hugging him, "You do
+think of lovely things."
+
+"Don't kiss the paint off my nose," said John James disengaging
+himself.  "I must look as well as possible to-night.  I shall try to
+interview the Dove if I can, and she's a very particular person
+indeed."
+
+  _Who'll be chief mourner?
+      I, said the Dove,
+      For I mourn for my love.
+  I'll be chief mourner._
+
+
+"Is that the one you mean?" asked Freda.
+
+"The same," said John James, "and a prettier little piece of goods I
+never saw."
+
+"You don't like her better than me, do you?" asked Gladys anxiously.
+
+John James got out his note book.
+
+"We'd better be off," he said, "or we shan't be in time."  And they
+started off on the Golliwog and Teddy Bear Railway, before Gladys had
+time to notice that he had not answered her question.
+
+When they got out at Birdland City, they saw a board fixed in a
+chestnut tree with these words on it:
+
+"This way to the Hall-in-the-Wood," and a bird's claw pointed towards
+the right direction.
+
+"Right-oh," said Tommy striding along, and by and by they saw the
+twinkling of lights in the distance, a strange building loomed up
+before them, and the next minute they stood outside the
+Hall-in-the-Wood.
+
+It was very curiously fashioned, something like a huge tree, with
+many wide spreading branches, where the audience could perch
+comfortably.  Although it was so early, a number of birds had already
+assembled, and formed a long queue outside, waiting impatiently to be
+let in.  As the tickets which our friends now presented were for
+admittance by "early doors," they were shown to their places without
+any delay by an obsequious Chaffinch.
+
+"I'll go round to the Green Room," whispered John James, and off he
+went to the door at the back of the Hall, intent upon interviewing
+Cock Robin.
+
+He found that gentleman in a daintily furnished apartment,
+upholstered in soft green moss.
+
+"So you want to interview me, do you?" said the Robin
+condescendingly, as the Golliwog was shown in.
+
+"If you could spare me five minutes," replied John James.
+
+"What paper do you represent?" enquired the Robin, as he put an extra
+dash of colour on his scarlet breast, and then rubbed it off again.
+
+John James presented his card.
+
+"Hum!--_The Golliwog News_!"  The Robin was visibly pleased.  "Well,
+you can ask me a few questions if you like," he said.
+
+"Could you tell me anything interesting about your early days?" asked
+John James sharpening his pencil.
+
+The Robin considered.
+
+"My ancestors were all highly respectable people," he said, "and all
+of them possessed the dramatic instinct.  My great grandfather was
+one of the original Robins who placed dead leaves over the Babes in
+the Wood.  It was in this very wood, too, and not one hundred yards
+from this very Hall.  But that, of course, was years before this
+place was built."
+
+"I must make a special note of that," said John James.
+
+"I have taken the part of Cock Robin for over three hundred nights,"
+continued the vain little bird, "and received tremendous applause
+every time.  I don't want to sing my own praises, but I may venture
+to say--and of course you need not put this in the paper, unless you
+particularly wish to do so--that I am the most popular person in this
+piece.  In fact," he continued, in a low voice, "I am the chief
+attraction."
+
+"I quite agree with you," said John James suavely, writing rapidly.
+
+"I suppose," he added, "that the other members of the company admire
+and envy your histrionic powers?"
+
+The Robin coughed, and surveyed himself in a large swinging mirror.
+
+"Well, between you and me," he began confidentially, "they are all
+jealous of my popularity, especially the Sparrow, whose very minor
+part is as much as he can manage.  I have heard on excellent
+authority----"
+
+Here a noise outside interrupted the Robin's flow of eloquence.  A
+rustle, rustle, as of a lady's silk petticoat, was heard in the
+passage and a loud banging of doors sent a sudden draught through the
+Hall-in-the-Wood.  The door handle was turned, and as John James
+looked up, a beautifully plumed grey Dove burst into the Robin's
+private dressing-room.
+
+When she saw the Robin she laughed immoderately.
+
+"Oh, dear!  I _am_ so sorry!" she cried, giggling very much, and
+trying to stuff her handkerchief into her beak.  "So stupid of me.
+Hee-hee-hee.  Forgive me, Mr. Robin, I opened the wrong door by
+accident.  Ho-ho-ho.  You _do_ look smart.  And who is the gentleman
+with the note book?  A newspaper man?  Well, well!  Come and see me
+when you've finished here, and I'll tell you something to put in the
+paper.  Goodbye."
+
+She rustled out again, banged the door behind her, and as she went to
+her own room they could distinctly hear her faint "Hee-hee," and then
+in shrill tones: "My dear, such a joke!  I went into that _horrid_
+Robin's room by accident, and----"
+
+"Just like her!" cried the Robin wrathfully, when the last sound of
+her voice had died away.
+
+"She's always doing things like that.  Well, you'll have to excuse me
+now, Mr. Golliwog, or I shan't be ready when the curtain rises."
+
+John James hurried away, and found the Dove without much difficulty.
+A Wren was standing on a chair dropping something into her eyes to
+make them look large and mournful.  As John James was announced, she
+was so startled that she tipped the bottle and the fluid ran all over
+the Dove's feathers and down on to the floor.
+
+"Careless thing!" said the Dove laughing, and giving the little Wren
+a playful peck.
+
+"Now you'd better wipe it up.  Be off, and fetch Mr. Robin's silk
+neckerchief--that will do nicely."
+
+Then she turned to John James.
+
+"I like worrying Mr. Robin," she remarked with a charming smile.  "He
+is so proud of his fancied popularity.  And really, everyone knows
+that he has nothing to do, only to lie still and be carried about in
+a starch box.  Now, my part requires genuine skill.  Emotional, you
+see.  So difficult to manage one's voice."
+
+"Have you been acting this part long?" asked John James, trying to
+keep her strictly to the business in hand.
+
+The Dove shut her eyes.
+
+"Not very long.  I am still so young you see.  It seems only the
+other day that mamma said to me----"
+
+"May I ask what is your favourite recreation?" said John James.
+
+"Walking, I think," was the reply, "with plenty of people looking on,
+you know.  But I can't keep it up very long.  I get such a stiff
+neck."
+
+"I've made a note of that," said John James.  "And your favourite
+dish?"
+
+"Green peas."
+
+"And may I enquire," continued John James suavely, "what is your
+favourite flower?"
+
+"Orange blossom," sighed the Dove coyly.  "So white, so pure, so
+inno----"
+
+"Yes--and what tooth-powder do you use?"
+
+"Powdered gravel," she said; "it loosens the tongue and aids
+conversation."
+
+"And what toilet soap do you most affect?" said the Golliwog, still
+writing busily.
+
+"Lick-lick, of course.  It is simply delightful!  I recommended it to
+Mr. Owl the other day and now he wouldn't be without it for worlds.
+He tells me that sometimes when he is hungry, he simply makes a
+lather of lick-lick and bathes in it.  He finds it quite a tonic."
+
+"Thank you," said John James.  "We must let Mr. Purr-Catt know that."
+
+"Don't mention him!" exclaimed the Dove, ringing hastily for the
+Wren.  "His very name makes my head ache."
+
+There was no time for further conversation, as the curtain was timed
+to rise in a very few minutes; so John James bade a hurried farewell
+to Miss Dove, who seemed quite affected at parting with such a
+pleasant fellow.
+
+Hurrying back to Gladys and her friends John James had to follow
+behind three old lady Owls who wore cobwebs tied over their heads.
+They all glanced reproachfully at Gladys, Tommy and Freda, and one
+remarked to the other that there seemed hardly room for a body to
+perch.
+
+"We do seem to take up rather a lot of room," said Gladys, but John
+James only laughed and told her to sit as tight as she could or
+someone else might get her place.
+
+Birds were now rapidly arriving from all quarters, many of them in
+evening dress, and there was a good deal of stir and flutter while
+they were arranging themselves in their places.
+
+"You're on my twig!" said a shrill, sharp voice suddenly, and,
+looking round, our little party was confronted by an important
+looking Blue Titmouse in a mustard coloured waistcoat.
+
+The children apologised in chorus, and moved further along the branch.
+
+"I've perched here every night since the Hall was opened," said the
+new-comer slightly mollified, "and it's very annoying indeed when
+other people take it.  Ah, the orchestra is just beginning.  I
+thought I wasn't late."
+
+Gladys, Tommy and Freda jail looked in the direction indicated, and
+for a few minutes they were unable to take their eyes off these truly
+wonderful musicians.
+
+There were a dozen Bantam Cocks scraping on violins, and an equal
+number of smart Cockerels, with bulging eyes and puffed-out cheeks,
+behind as many silver cornets.  Then, slightly elevated, sat a row of
+fat Turkeys with crimson wattles, playing enormous 'cellos, and
+punctuating the music with gobble--gobble--gobbles.  Behind them
+stood a number of Peacocks, piping tunefully on Clarionettes.  Their
+tails were outspread and formed a brilliant background.
+
+At the piano sat an affected Goose, who appeared to be somewhat too
+large for the music stool.  She was deeply interested in her own
+reflection, which shone in the polished piano case, and continually
+arranged the feathers at her throat.
+
+A Parrot with bright green plumage worked himself into a perfect
+fury, trying, with his trombone, to drown the sound of bagpipes,
+which were played to a great nicety by a Flamingo dressed in a kilt
+and wearing a tam-o'-shanter.
+
+A very thin Stork stood upon one leg beating a huge drum with the
+other, while the conductor, Herr von Pelican, stood solemnly in
+front, beating time with his beak.
+
+Upon all sides of the three children rose a murmur of bird-chatter,
+which they thought very amusing.  The bird-gossip was something like
+this:
+
+"I should like to _kiss_ that sweet Cock Robin!"
+
+"She's got the loveliest dress you ever saw.  Green shot with----"
+
+"Take those dirty claws off my waistcoat!"
+
+"I always scream when the arrow flies----"
+
+"No, they haven't built a nest yet, but I heard the other day----"
+
+"If you don't stop chirping this very minute, I shall take you out!"
+
+"Mind my cobweb, or you'll drag it off my head!"
+
+"Have you been to the Bazaar?  I am told things are going for a song!"
+
+"Don't say I said so, but our neighbour Tim Jackdaw is losing all his
+feathers----"
+
+"My dear, imagine my horror!  I went into the kitchen and found a
+policeman sitting at the table eating my best----"
+
+The children did not hear what dainty the policeman was devouring,
+for at that moment the curtain rose, and the performance began.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VIII.
+
+  Here you meet an old friend in a different dress,
+  But we think you will recognize, nevertheless,
+  The story we all in our nurseries heard,
+  A very old tale of a bad little bird.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER VIII.
+
+WHO KILLED COCK ROBIN.
+
+Every member of that feathered audience looked with rapt attention
+towards the stage, where a Sparrow and a Robin stood facing each
+other in menacing attitudes.
+
+  SPARROW, fiercely:
+          _And so 'tis clear,
+    There is no welcome for you here.
+    Be off!  And never yet again
+    Let me behold you in this lane._
+
+  ROBIN, cheerfully:
+    _Ha, ha!  Ha, ha!  Tra, la, la, la!_
+
+  SPARROW, dancing with rage:
+    Your senseless song enrages me!
+
+  ROBIN, more cheerfully:
+    _Don't listen, friend.  Tra la, la lee!_
+
+  SPARROW, trembling with anger:
+    _I'll find a way to silence that.
+    I will, or else I'll eat my hat!
+    Such insolence I never heard--
+    You are a most outrageous bird.
+    I'll go, but we shall meet once more._
+
+  ROBIN, calmly:
+    _Had you not better go before
+    Your claws wear out?  You seem excited,
+    Or I should now be most delighted
+    To sing to you a little ditty.
+    You cannot stay?  Ah, what a pity!_
+
+As the Sparrow turned away, he shook his claw at the Robin, who,
+perching on a lilac tree, began to sing:
+
+
+      _I know a fellow,
+      Such a funny fellow,
+    Never knew him jolly, never yet.
+      How he shrieks and chatters,
+      Tearing things to tatters,
+    I shall never nevermore forget!
+      Why, a vegetable marrow
+      Has more brains than Mr. Sparrow,
+  And his singing!--well, I know it for a fact,
+     When once to sing he tried,
+     All the birdies far and wide,
+     Had to stuff their ears quite full
+     Of the softest cotton wool,
+  For his voice was like a penny whistle--cracked!_
+
+
+Just as the Robin finished his song, the Sparrow, armed with a bow
+and arrow, crept up behind him, muttering:
+
+    _I'll shoot so steadily and true,
+    I fancy this will settle you._
+
+
+And taking careful aim, he shot at the Robin, who fell, quivered for
+a moment, then, attempting to rise, gasped feebly:
+
+    _A craven's trick!  He takes to flight!
+    I'll beat him yet in open fight._
+
+
+He then made a further attempt to rise, but fell back, while the
+Sparrow, disappearing, remarked in a low voice:
+
+    _'Tis done!  And no one saw the deed._
+
+
+But he was mistaken, for a Bluebottle had watched the whole affair
+from the top of the lilac tree, and flying down beside the Robin he
+said:
+
+    _We'll catch him yet, for all his speed._
+
+
+A Starling, dressed as a policeman then entered.
+
+  BLUEBOTTLE FLY, buzzing angrily:
+    _Ho, there!  Why, here's a nice to-do!
+    A pretty constable are you!
+    An idle loon, a careless lout.
+    Don't loiter there.  Shout, fellow, shout!_
+
+
+The Starling immediately blew his whistle and other policemen rushed
+in, accompanied by quite a mob of birds.  They raised Cock Robin's
+head, and tried artificial respiration, but without effect.
+
+  FIRST STARLING:
+    _Go, one of you for Doctor Drake,
+    Not for a quack--make no mistake._
+  Voices from the mob:
+    _I'll go for him.
+                          And I.
+                                  And I._
+
+  STARLING, calling after them as they disappear:
+
+    _I saw him on the pond hard by,
+    An hour ago, and talked with him
+    The while he took his morning swim.
+    Go there, and if you find him not,
+    Search underneath the pigeon cote,
+    And in the barn and round about--_
+
+  Voice from the mob:
+    _And let his mother know he's out!_
+
+  STARLING, brandishing his truncheon:
+    _Be silent, sirrah, or I'll whack
+    You, on your idiotic back._
+
+  FIRST STARLING, sorrowfully:
+    _Somehow, 'twas always my belief
+    That yon poor bird would come to grief,
+    But not with such a fearful death._
+
+  A WREN:
+    _A nobler fellow ne'er drew breath.
+    Once on a cold December day,
+    I saw him give a worm away;
+    A mangled worm, he could not eat--
+    Such kindness it were hard to beat.
+    He will be missed.  We'll never see
+    Another such a bird as he._
+
+  A RAVEN, aside:
+    _How queer, that now poor Rob is dead,
+    These very pleasant things are said.
+    'Tis strange, when only yesterday
+    He was a "wretch," a "popinjay."
+    A "vicious bird," and "quarrelsome,"
+    But now--why, every mouth is dumb
+    Except in praising him!_
+
+  Aloud: _I see
+    Good Doctor Drake comes hastily._
+
+
+The Doctor now hurried in, attired in a white waistcoat, and wearing
+a gold watch and chain.  He bent over Cock Robin and felt his pulse.
+
+  FIRST STARLING:
+    _Ah, the good Doctor shakes his head!_
+
+  DOCTOR DRAKE:
+    _Yes, friends, the poor, dear bird is dead._
+
+
+At this point, the Sparrow rushed in, with eyes starting out of his
+head, and stooping over the Robin, cried in an agitated voice:
+
+    _What's this I hear?  My dear, dear friend
+    Cock Robin!  Oh, is this the end
+    Of all our pleasant times together?_
+
+Looking round at the crowd, he began to sob:
+
+    _I loved him, friends, loved every feather
+    In his dear breast.  And now--and now._
+
+
+He would have said more, but the Bluebottle Fly, pushing his way to
+the front of the crowd, shouted:
+
+    _The lying traitor!  Hear me how,
+    I saw him with his bow and arrow
+    Kill poor Cock Robin!  Treacherous Sparrow,
+    Your deed is known.  Seize him, my men,
+    And let him ne'er escape again!_
+
+
+Three Starlings at once seized the Sparrow and led him away.  Three
+other Starlings carried Cock Robin in a starch box, and they all
+marched off the stage followed by Doctor Drake, the Bluebottle Fly,
+and the mob, everyone singing dolefully the following dirge:
+
+    _Poor Cock Robin is surely dead.
+      Dead as a door nail, he.
+    Shot with an arrow right through the head,
+      Under the lilac tree._
+
+    _Poor Cock Robin!  He fought us all,
+      Danced in his warlike glee.
+    From early morn until evening fall,
+      Under the lilac tree._
+
+    _Poor Cock Robin is dead as bone.
+      King of warriors he!
+    And to his name we'll raise a stone
+      Under the lilac tree._
+
+
+Then the curtain fell, for the first scene was over.
+
+The children each drew a long breath.
+
+"Oh, wasn't it lovely!" sighed Gladys.  "I could listen all night."
+
+"Those old ladies are wiping their eyes," whispered Tommy.  "Crazy
+old Owls!  There's nothing to cry about."
+
+"Hush!" said Freda.  "They'll hear you."
+
+And evidently, one of them--a sad-looking Owl with
+spectacles--actually did, for she put up both claws and adjusted her
+cobweb which had got pushed to one side, and looking round, tried to
+appear as if she had not been weeping.
+
+"That wicked Sparrow!" sobbed the young Wren, who was just behind.
+"I should like to peck him."
+
+"But it isn't true, you know," said Gladys turning round and looking
+at her solemnly.  "It is only a play, and Cock Robin is as much alive
+as you are."
+
+"I know," said the Wren, "I know it quite well, but I cry like this
+every night.  It's my tender heart, the least little thing----  Oh,
+here come the refreshments!"
+
+She dried her tears very quickly, and beckoned to a Magpie who was
+carrying round a tray of eatables.
+
+Gladys felt rather pleased too, for she thought that she could enjoy
+a chocolate.
+
+"A packet of dried flies, please," said the Wren quickly, holding out
+her claw when the Magpie arrived.
+
+"I want----" began Gladys, and then she stopped, for she discovered
+that there was nothing on the tray but bits of groundsel, little
+dishes of bird-seed, packets of flies, and a few snails done up in
+silver paper.
+
+"What a sell!" cried Tommy, as the Magpie hopped away to supply a
+Thrush.  "Never mind, I've got some butter-scotch."
+
+"Where is it?" asked Freda.  "Give me a bit, please."
+
+Tommy hesitated.
+
+"It's in my pocket," he said, "but it won't come out.  Let's all pull
+together, and perhaps it will."
+
+The three children tugged with all their might, and the butter-scotch
+was persuaded to sever its connection with Tommy's coat.  He broke
+the sticky lump into three pieces, and they each sucked steadily.
+
+"The curtain's going up for the second act," whispered the Wren, with
+her mouth full of flies.
+
+The scene revealed was the corner of a wood, where stood a great oak,
+crowded on every branch with all kinds of birds, screaming, and
+chattering, and flapping their wings.  Suddenly there was silence as
+Mr. Justice Hawk entered, and said haughtily to two Starlings:
+
+    _Mind, fellows, now what you're about;
+    Make haste and bring the prisoner out._
+
+  STARLINGS, hastily dragging in the Sparrow:
+    He's here my lord.
+
+  HAWK: _Hum!  Ha!  'Tis well._
+    _Now, villain, speak.  I pray you tell
+    Who killed Cock Robin?_
+
+SPARROW, boldly, shaking his claw-cuffs:
+                              _I--I--I!
+    D'you want to know the reason why?
+    He stole the crumbs the children spread
+    For me and mine.  He also said
+    My voice was cracked.  He took the site
+    In yonder hawthorn blossom white,
+    That I had chosen for a nest.
+    He made himself a perfect pest,
+    Till I was weary of my life.
+    He made grimaces at my wife!
+    And so I shot him, and rejoice
+    That I shall never hear his voice----_
+
+  HAWK, interrupting him, with a horrified exclamation:
+    _Bloodthirsty wretch!  Ah, vicious bird!
+    Your wicked tale we all have heard.
+    And that poor Rob is truly dead,
+    Slain by an arrow, as you said,
+    We cannot doubt.  Yet 'tis for me
+    To ask of this vast company,
+    Did anybody see him die?_
+
+
+The Bluebottle Fly, who was quite overawed by Mr. Justice Hawk,
+stammered badly, as he said:
+
+    _I did, m-m-my lord.  With my-my-eye._
+
+  HAWK, impatiently:
+    _Well, what of that?  We don't suppose
+    You could have seen him with your nose._
+
+
+At this, there was loud laughter in the court, which was speedily
+suppressed, as Judge Hawk turned to the Sparrow again:
+
+    _And all that now remains to do,
+    Is just to deal--vile wretch!--with you.
+    You're sentenced to be pecked to death,
+    Till you shall drop for want of breath._
+
+
+The Starlings then released their prisoner who fluttered away,
+followed by the whole court, all calling and screaming and trying to
+peck him.  Presently they returned without him.  The Hawk resumed his
+seat, and addressed the court as follows:
+
+    _Now, gentlemen, it is for us
+    Without unnecessary fuss,
+    To see that our lamented friend
+    Who met with such a grievous end,
+    Is well and honourable interred
+    As shall become a noble bird.
+    And since of kin he is bereft,
+    And has no near relations left,
+    Because--ahem!--He fought them all._
+
+
+  Voice from the mob:
+    _Good old Cock Robin!_
+
+  HAWK, looking round angrily:
+                    _I must call
+    On you for aid.  And first I ask,
+    Who'll be chief mourner?_
+
+
+In response to this appeal, a grey Dove pressed forward weeping, and
+said:
+
+                        _I, my lord,
+    I weep, sir, at the simplest word.
+    I'll gladly mourn for poor Cock Robin._
+
+  HAWK, kindly:
+    _My dear good madam, cease your sobbing._
+
+  THE DOVE:
+    _I can't, my lord.  I weep in flight,
+    And in the middle of the night.
+    Weep at a frown, or at a kiss,
+    Or at important times like this.
+    I weep in March, and weep in June,
+    And at the changes of the moon.
+    When leaves are green, and leaves are falling.
+    My laundry bill is most appalling.
+    And not the least of all my griefs,
+    I lose so many handkerchiefs._
+
+
+The Dove walked away, still sobbing, and the Hawk looked after her,
+remarking absently:
+
+    _Poor thing!  So pretty too!  And young!_
+
+  A PIGEON:
+    _Bold hussey!  With her smooth false tongue!_
+
+  HAWK, turning to the court:
+    _Who'll dig the grave?_
+
+
+Six Owls then marched in, carrying spades and trowels, and arranging
+themselves in a semi-circle, they sang in chorus, blinking violently
+to the music:
+
+    _We will quickly dig a grave,
+    For the Robin bold and brave.
+    Line it with the softest moss,
+    Strew forget-me-nots across._
+
+    _Plant sweet roses o'er his head--
+    Roses white, and roses red.
+    All without reward or fee,
+    Just in loving memory._
+
+  HAWK:
+    _That's settled, then.  Now, stir your stumps,
+    Before I get the doleful dumps._
+
+Exit Owls.
+
+
+Then to the court he said:
+
+    _But which of you will be the clerk?_
+
+  A LARK replied:
+    _I will, if it's not after dark._
+
+  HAWK:
+    _Who'll carry Robin to his rest?_
+
+  A KITE:
+    _I will.  But daylight suits me best._
+
+  HAWK:
+    _That's all, I think?  Why, no!  Well, well,
+    I had forgot!  Who'll toll the bell?_
+
+
+Now a Bull thrust in his head from the back of the stage, and
+bellowed at the top of his voice:
+
+    _I will, my lord!_
+
+  HAWK, doubtfully:
+    _But can you pull?_
+
+  BULL, looking injured:
+    _Now, do I look a sickly bull?
+    Last time--well, just to show my power,
+    I dragged the bell out of the tower,
+    And broke the rope, and smashed the door,
+    Which made the mourners weep the more.
+    In fact, I nearly killed them all.
+    It was a splendid funeral!_
+
+HAWK, rising:
+  _Well, now we start.  I trust those Owls
+  Have nimbly plied their spades and trowels._
+
+
+The curtain fell, as the procession, headed by the Hawk, left the
+stage.  But the play was not quite over, for almost immediately the
+curtain rose once more, revealing the birds standing in tableau round
+the Robin's grave, singing softly and mournfully the closing chorus:
+
+    _Lay him under the lilac tree,
+    'Neath the twig where he loved to be.
+    Trilling loudly his cheery song,
+    Morn by morn all the winter long.
+    Silent now, for he takes his rest.
+    Poor little bird with the scarlet breast!_
+
+    _Nevermore, when the sweet Spring stirs,
+    Will he hunt for worms in the chestnut burrs.
+    Nevermore will the snails hard by,
+    Hide away from his bold bright eye.
+    Hark!  How his mate calls to her dear,
+    Bui poor Cock Robin will never hear.
+    Never fashion a cosy nest--
+    Poor little bird with the scarlet breast!_
+
+
+The curtain fell for the last time, and with a great deal of
+fluttering and commotion, the audience began to disperse.
+
+"I'm glad Spottikins didn't eat the Sparrow, aren't you?" said Gladys.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IX.
+
+  They saw the streets of old Fish Town
+    So gaily decorated.
+  While long for Father Neptune's car
+    Among the crowd they waited.
+  Rubbed shoulders 'mid the noise and fuss,
+  With such a frisky Octopus!
+
+
+
+CHAPTER IX.
+
+VISIT TO FISH TOWN.
+
+Tommy had gone to the fishmonger's shop with a message from his
+mother.  Some fine-looking Lobsters were on the marble slab at the
+door, with a large assortment of Oysters, Whiting and Cod, but there
+was no one at all in the shop.
+
+Tommy waited several minutes, making grimaces at the fishy smell,
+when all at once he heard a sound remarkably like sobbing.  He looked
+round and saw a large Cod, sitting up, crying bitterly, and trying to
+wipe his eyes with his fins.
+
+"Goodness gracious!  Whatever _is_ the matter?"
+
+Tommy stuck his hands in his pockets and looked at the sorrowful
+fish, who raised a watery eye to his face.
+
+"I can't go to the fair," said the Cod.  "Oh, dear!  I've been caught
+at last, and now I shan't be able to go to the fair.  I've never
+missed it before, not since I was able to swim alone."
+
+"Hard lines," said Tommy sympathetically.  "It isn't fair."
+
+"Oh, but I assure you it is," contradicted the Codfish eagerly.  "And
+a very special fair indeed, this time.  Father Neptune has consented
+to visit Fish Town, and my b-brother is going to sing at the
+b-banquet.  Oh-oh-oh! and the Mayor and Corporation--"
+
+At this point the Cod sobbed dismally, and for a long time could not
+be persuaded to say any more.
+
+"Cheer up, old chap!" said Tommy; he could not think of anything else
+to say.  "Perhaps some nice person will eat you--er-er-I mean----"
+
+"Yes, yes, I understand," said the Cod, shaking a salt tear on to the
+shelf beside him.  "Of course they might--you never know.  And there
+might--it's just possible--be an account of my decease in _The
+Golliwog News_, especially as my brother is to sing at the
+banquet--you never know."
+
+"Oh, I say," Tommy interrupted him, "do you know about _The Golliwog
+News_?"
+
+"It's the only newspaper circulating in Fish Town," replied the Cod,
+"and my second cousin, who was caught in a net by a----"
+
+"I shall go to Fish Town," said Tommy decidedly.  "I shall go to the
+fair."
+
+"Then if you see my brother----" began the Cod, tearfully.
+
+"Go on," said Tommy; but there was no answer.  The Codfish lay
+apparently lifeless among his comrades, and the fishmonger stood
+before Tommy, asking what his pleasure might be that fine morning.
+
+"Lobster!" said Tommy hurriedly.  "Send it up.  And jolly well stir
+your stumps."  Then he rushed out of the shop, and was hurrying down
+the road, when just at the corner he met Gladys and Freda and John
+James.
+
+"Where's _The Golliwog News_?" he cried.
+
+John James took it out of his pocket.
+
+"Fish Town!" gasped Tommy, quite out of breath with excitement.  "I'm
+going--I mean we're all going to Fish Town.  Let me look at the time
+table."
+
+He seized the newspaper.
+
+"Here we are!  Golliwog and Teddy Bear Railway.  Frogland--Kitten
+Town--Birdland City--_Fish Town_.  H'm.  There's a royal visit going
+on, and a fair, and all sorts of fun.  We musn't miss it.  Are you
+going, John James?"
+
+"Yes," replied the Golliwog.  "They have this fair every year, but
+Father Neptune has never been to Fish Town before.  It is an
+important event and I hear the royal procession will be a sight to
+behold.  If we take the next train, we ought to get a good view, and
+I _might_ be able to smuggle you in to the banquet."
+
+[Illustration: "'HOW DO!' HE SAID PLEASANTLY, 'FINE DOINGS HERE,
+TO-DAY.'"]
+
+Off they started, and their train arrived about half an hour late,
+but that was hardly to be wondered at in such circumstances, for the
+number of travellers bound for Fish Town was enormous!
+
+When they reached the main streets, the police--Mackerels dressed in
+blue and silver uniforms--were just stopping the vehicular traffic.
+A fat, perspiring Turbot, in charge of a Sea Horse drawing a cart
+full of broken coral, was protesting noisily, and had to be led away
+to the Fish Town gaol.
+
+The three children and John James took their stand near a large
+Octopus and some Lemon Soles.  As the latter could squeeze together
+very closely, quite a number were accommodated in a small space.  But
+the Octopus took up a great deal more than his share of room,
+because, every now and then, he persisted in stretching all his arms
+and legs at once, so naturally, there was a continual commotion among
+the Soles.  Every few minutes a policeman came rushing up to see what
+could be the matter.  On one of these occasions the said policeman
+nodded to John James.
+
+"How do?" he said pleasantly; "fine doings here to-day."
+
+"Very," rejoined the Golliwog; "whole population turned out, hasn't
+it?"
+
+"Pretty near," said the gentleman in blue.  "Them Oysters ain't come
+yet, I don't believe.  Gave me half a Nep, they did, to wake them and
+get 'em out of bed in time to see the procession."
+
+"Ask him where the fair is," whispered Freda.
+
+The policeman stared at her curiously, thinking no doubt that she was
+a strange kind of fish with which he was not acquainted?
+
+"It's over yonder," he said, waving his fin; "and it starts when
+Father Neptune has gone by, and lasts till it's time for the banquet."
+
+"Fish Town is quite _en fête_," remarked Gladys with her most
+grown-up manner.
+
+"On what?" asked the policeman.  "It's on the job.  That's what it
+is.  Now come, sir"--addressing the Octopus sternly--"we can't have
+you stretching them arms of yours again, not till the show is over."
+
+"Excuse me," he said to John James, "I see Miss Shrimp has just
+fainted.  I must go and see about the ambulance."
+
+"I hope I shan't faint," whispered a stout Lady-Lobster to a very
+nicely dressed Crab.  "I think I must put up my parasol, I am so
+afraid for my complexion.  My dear, whenever I am exposed to heat, I
+go so red, you'd never believe."
+
+She produced a green parasol, and held it jauntily aloft, while all
+the fish in her vicinity were obliged to dodge and duck their heads,
+for fear of having their eyes poked out.
+
+Presently there were loud cries: "He's coming!"
+
+Young Prawns kept darting out into the line of route, shouting, and
+pretending to see the procession.
+
+Every time they shouted, the crowd adjusted hats and bonnets, and
+hoisted small fry on to their shoulders, but only to let them slide
+down again the next minute.  At last, however, just as everyone's
+patience was nearly exhausted, there was the sound of music in the
+distance.  It came nearer--nearer, and then a detachment of Mounted
+Plaice appeared in sight.
+
+Oh, how excited the crowd became!  They leapt and danced, and some of
+them dived into the drinking fountains, and out again.  They shouted
+and sang, and when the Mounted Plaice--looking very solemn and fully
+aware of their important position--actually passed by, the fish on
+either side waved fins and tails, and gave them such an ovation that
+royalty itself could ask no more.
+
+Close upon the heels of the Mounted Plaice marched the band of the
+First Battalion, Lobster Fusiliers, splendidly drilled, wearing
+busbies and playing "King Neptune Rules the Waves."
+
+"Rule!  King Neptune!" shouted the Octopus, and a strange medley of
+voices took up the refrain:
+
+  _King Neptune rules the waves;
+    Good fish never--never--never
+      shall be slaves._
+
+
+Tommy threw his cap in the air and sang at the top of his voice, as
+madly as any fish in that excited crowd, but under his breath he
+whispered:
+
+"Father Neptune is a silly old Goat.  Everybody knows it's Britannia
+who rules the waves, and Britons who never will be slaves."
+
+By this time the members of the band had passed our three friends,
+but immediately after them followed a detachment of the same regiment
+headed by "Fighting Lobbs," the fierce and military looking major.
+
+The Lady Lobster with the parasol became greatly excited as these
+splendid looking soldiers marched past, and then she suddenly
+startled everyone by screaming shrilly:
+
+"Shelliback--Shelliback!  Can't you see _me_.
+
+"It's my son," she explained to anyone who would listen.
+
+"Shelliback!  Shelliback!"
+
+Here she made a desperate lunge with the parasol and knocked off the
+busby of a pompous little corporal who marched by the side of the
+last squad.  By the time he had rescued it, and brushed off the dust
+with his fin, Shelliback had passed on, and the little corporal was
+obliged to take to his heels and run to catch up with his brilliant
+regiment.
+
+There was loud laughter from the crowd, but this was speedily
+suppressed as a squadron of Sword Fish, with drawn swords went by.
+
+Then, very slowly and impressively, came Father Neptune's chariot
+drawn by sixteen magnificent Sturgeons, with bells of pearl upon
+their harness, and Sea Anemones behind their ears.
+
+On either side of Father Neptune sat three beautiful Mermaids,
+dressed in robes of sea-green and silver, and each of them carried a
+brush and comb in a neat little bag in case her hair needed attention
+on the way.
+
+Father Neptune appeared to be a very benevolent old fellow.  He
+smiled and bowed right and left in acknowledgment of the cheers of
+the populace.  In fact he responded so heartily that several times
+his crown slipped over one ear, and had to be adjusted by the
+Mermaids.
+
+The royal chariot was followed by the Walrus Dragoons (King Neptune's
+Own) who looked amazingly fierce, as became their sovereign's
+favourite regiment.
+
+The Mayor of Fish Town, Mr. Solomon Seal, accompanied by the
+Mayoress, occupied the carriage which came first after the Dragoons.
+
+"There's that _dear_ Mr. Seal!" cried the Lady Lobster very loudly.
+"He will surely be knighted, if only because of Solomon Seal's
+Sanatorium, which he so recently endowed--and all with his own money."
+
+"Did you know," she continued, turning to the Crab, "that my precious
+Shelliback spent six months there and came out quite a new being?"
+
+"Be quiet," replied the Crab testily.  "You keep stepping on my sore
+claw, and your parasol is a perfect nuisance."
+
+The Aldermen and Town Councillors came next, with many other members
+of various offices, such as the Fish Town Bank, Post Office, and the
+Manager of the Water Company, a very important personage indeed.
+
+The Fish Town Fire Brigade now came in sight, their well polished
+helmets gleaming splendidly as they passed, followed by the Fish
+Societies, the first of which, the three children were much amused to
+find, from the banner which they bore aloft, was the Independent
+Order of Codfellows.
+
+Now the Drum and Fife Band of the First Crab Guards marched past,
+followed by a second detachment of Mounted Plaice, who brought up the
+rear of this amazing procession.
+
+Immediately upon their heels came a nondescript crew of students from
+the Fish Town University.  They had joined hands across the street
+and were singing and shouting "Long live old Father Nep!"
+
+This, as may well be imagined, created a tremendous uproar, and all
+the forces of law and order were taxed to their utmost.
+
+When they had all passed, the Octopus gave a tremendous stretch,
+which sent about a dozen Lemon Soles, the Lady Lobster with her
+parasol, and the nicely dressed Crab, flying in all directions.
+
+John James and the three children narrowly escaped being pushed
+through a shop window, and when they had recovered their footing,
+they found themselves being carried along by a steady stream of fish
+which was drifting towards the Fish Town Mansion House.
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER X.
+
+  Tells about the Fish Town fair,
+  And the knighting of the Mayor.
+  Tells about the banqueting,
+  Where the Fish recite and sing.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER X.
+
+THE BANQUET.
+
+"I vote," said Tommy, as John James led them down a side street to
+escape the crowd, "that we go down to the fair.  We ought to have
+plenty of time to look round, and still arrive at the Mansion House
+in time to see the Mayor present the address.  Think what a long way
+the procession has to go, and how very slowly it travels.  Let's go,
+John James, I don't want to miss the fair."
+
+"All right," said John James, "I don't mind."
+
+"I liked the procession very well," remarked Gladys, as they hurried
+along with all the speed they could, "but I thought we should have
+seen the Sea Serpent in it.  I'm surprised he wasn't there.  Shall we
+see him to-day, anywhere, John James?"
+
+"Well," said John James, good naturedly "I'm not quite sure, but I
+fancy he has a shop here, somewhere in this street.  I'm wanting a
+pair of eye-glasses."
+
+"You want eye-glasses, John James!" cried Gladys, bursting with
+laughter.  "Why, you will look strange!  I don't believe they will
+stop on your funny little nose."
+
+"All editors wear eye-glasses, and I don't see why I shouldn't," said
+John James stolidly.  "I shall get a pair.  Hullo!  Here's the very
+place."
+
+He stopped before a shop window full of spectacles, and looked in
+while the children read the sign over the door.
+
+  PROFESSOR SEE SERPENT.
+  Optician.
+
+
+"The shop won't be open to-day, will it?" said Tommy trying the door.
+
+But the shop was open, so they all trooped in, and the Sea Serpent
+bustled out from a room at the back and stood behind the counter
+awaiting their pleasure.
+
+He was a curious object.  He wore a green fancy waistcoat with yellow
+spots, and all the time they were in the shop he was showing his
+teeth in an expansive grin.
+
+"Try them on!  Try them on!" he cried, bringing out a tray full of
+spectacles and eye-glasses.  He fitted a pair on the Golliwog's nose,
+and John James strutted about the shop trying to see himself in a
+mirror which hung high above him on the wall.
+
+The Sea Serpent was so very pleasant, he insisted that Gladys, Tom
+and Freda should try on some spectacles as well, although they
+assured him they had no intention of buying any.
+
+"Never mind--never mind," said he.  "It may lead to custom in the
+long run.  I keep a large stock of goods, and should be pleased to
+supply you at any time.  You might take my card in case you forget
+the address."
+
+With a very low bow he handed them each a card, and Gladys murmured
+that she would recommend him to her grandfather.
+
+"Do--do," said the Sea Serpent eagerly, "I make grandfathers a
+speciality."
+
+"Have you chosen your glasses, sir?" he added turning to John James.
+"You have?  Thank you."
+
+He took them off the Golliwog's nose, polished them on his waistcoat,
+and popped them inside a neat little case.
+
+"Have you any grandparents, sir?" he enquired politely.
+
+John James tucked his newly acquired treasure into his pocket.
+
+"Yes," he said.  "One--grandmother--hundred years old this
+week--reads _Golliwog News_ without glasses.  Good day, sir."
+
+The Sea Serpent hastily wriggled over the counter to open the door
+for them, and in bowing his adieus, he bent himself almost into a
+hoop.  Looking back, they saw him still winding and unwinding himself
+in an excess of politeness.
+
+[Illustration: "THE LAST ITEM ON THE PROGRAMME WAS A HUMOROUS SONG BY
+MR. MERRY CODFISH."]
+
+"Silly old Goat!" said Tommy.  "Now let's go to the fair."
+
+They had no difficulty in finding the spot where the fair was held,
+but, naturally, they now had very little time to spare, and could
+only look round at the principal items of amusement.
+
+There were several roundabouts, with galloping sea lions, which, with
+the swing-boats, were largely patronised by all the small fry.  There
+were shooting galleries where stout, middle-aged papa fishes tried to
+show their skill to admiring wives, who remarked at intervals:
+
+"However _do_ you do it, dad?  I never saw such a fish!  You hit it
+_nearly_ every time.  So you do, I declare!"
+
+They caught sight of a few side shows--which Tommy longed to
+visit--such as the Man-faced Fish, and the Bearded Salmon, but there
+was no time for investigating either of these wonders.
+
+Our young friends did, however, stand for a few minutes to listen to
+a well-fed Pike, who was standing on a tub, and acting as a cheap
+Jack.  He was selling all sorts of articles to a crowd of silly young
+fish, chiefly Herrings and Prawns and a few Soles, who listened to
+him with their mouths wide open, which, perhaps, helped them to
+understand better what was being said.
+
+"Now, here," cried the Cheap Jack, "is a pair of scales, honestly
+worth half a Neptune.  I'll sell them for half that amount.  Five
+pearls--five pearls!  Who'll buy this valuable pair of scales for
+five pearls?  You won't?  Then I'm sorry for you.  I really am.  It's
+a genuine bargain.  You'll be sorry for yourselves to-morrow.  You'll
+say, 'I wish I had bought that pair of scales.'  Oh, yes, you will.
+What's that I hear?  You wouldn't mind giving three pearls?  Well,
+I'll sell them for three.  Just to oblige a lady.  Three
+pearls--three pearls!  Well, two.  Come now--two.  You can't resist
+two.  This splendid pair of scales going for two----"
+
+Here, a portly Sole held out two pearls.
+
+"You'll take them, madam?  Very good.  You have a bargain.  I ought
+not to have sold them, and that's a fact."
+
+The Pike now produced a bottle and a small glass.
+
+"Ladies and gentlemen," he resumed, making a great show of measuring
+a few drops out of a bottle and filling the glass up with
+water--"ladies and gentlemen, I have here a very efficacious and
+celebrated cough mixture of my own invention.  You may, ladies and
+gentlemen, have noticed a slight huskiness in my voice--the result of
+my--er--profession.  I will take a dose of my Seaweed Cough Juice,
+and you will no doubt perceive a difference."
+
+He drank the mixture, smacked his lips with evident appreciation,
+glanced round at the crowd, and continued his discourse in a shrill
+staccato voice.
+
+"Does any fish within sound of my voice suffer with a cough--with
+huskiness--asthma--bronchial troubles--shortness of breath--attacks
+of indigestion--rheumatism--chilblains--sore fins--or loss of energy?
+Let him step up here, and try my famous Seaweed Cough Juice.  First
+dose free.  Bottle with measuring glass--one Neptune, and dirt cheap
+at that.  Satisfaction guaranteed, or money refunded."
+
+"Come now," he continued.  "I can hear a fish coughing.  There he is!
+Very distressing--very.  Come, sir.  Come on, step up here beside me.
+Help him up, some of you.  This is going to promote health and
+prosperity in Fish Town.  Come along, sir.  Ah, that's right," he
+remarked, as a very nervous looking Whiting, coughing violently, was
+hoisted to the tub.
+
+A dose of the Seaweed Juice was administered.  The Whiting choked and
+spluttered, and was hurried out of the fair by his anxious mother.
+The Cheap Jack immediately sold several bottles of the cough mixture.
+Then he paused a moment before producing his next wonder.
+
+"I have here," he said slowly, looking round at the crowd, which had
+now increased considerably--"I have here, ladies and gentlemen"--and
+he hauled something out of a bag--"a _Reformed Shark_!"
+
+The crowd shuddered and began to edge further and further away.
+
+"There is no need to fear," continued the Pike, unfastening a chain
+which was round the Shark's neck.  "He is a reformed character, and
+quite harmless.  He would make a splendid footman, and could buttle
+if required.  I will sell him for two Neptunes--not a fraction less."
+
+By degrees the crowd began to disperse backwards, keeping an anxious
+eye on the Shark the while.
+
+"What, no offers?" cried the Cheap Jack.  "Here, I'll take one
+Neptune.  This fellow can work--cook--scrub--he can do anything.  He
+could keep an office clean, or give assistance with bookkeeping.  He
+is in splendid condition.  Good fins--good teeth--no trouble with a
+dentist."
+
+"Show your teeth, sirrah," he went on turning to the Shark.
+
+The Shark opened his mouth slowly, and showed his long wicked looking
+jaws.
+
+"He is, as I said, a reformed character," went on the Cheap Jack--but
+he spoke to empty air.  The crowd had taken to its heels--if fish
+have heels--and ran, as it had surely never run before.
+
+"Bit too previous for them," muttered the Pike, as he pushed the
+Shark into his bag, along with the cough mixture and cheap jewellery.
+
+"He was a very amusing sort of person," said Freda as they made a
+wild scamper for the Mansion House, for, while they listened to the
+Cheap Jack, time had flown.  However, in spite of their haste, they
+were too late to get a sight of the Mayor presenting Father Neptune
+with the freedom of Fish Town.  Although they pressed forward as much
+as possible, they were still on the outskirts of the crowd, and could
+see nothing.
+
+Presently word was passed from one to another that Father Neptune had
+asked one of the sword fish for a sword.
+
+"The Mayor's kneeling on the pavement!" cried a Limpet, who had
+climbed a lamp-post some weeks previously, to ensure getting a good
+view.
+
+"Father Neptune has given him a smack across the shoulder.  He's
+getting up again, and he's Sir Solomon Seal.  Hooray!  Now they are
+all going into the Mansion House."
+
+As the crowd of fish gradually dispersed, our young friends, led by
+the valiant Golliwog, managed to gain admittance to the banqueting
+hall, where they were waved to their seats by a smart waiter, with a
+serviette folded over his fin.
+
+Father Neptune looked very benevolent, and the newly created
+Knight-Mayor seemed beside himself with joy.  The Mayoress, chatting
+excitedly, hob-nobbed with all the grandees of Fish Town, alluding
+frequently to her husband as "_Sir_ Solomon," and remarking again and
+again what a very happy day it had been.
+
+Before all the guests were seated, Tommy, whose sharp ears were ever
+on the alert, heard a whispering taking place between Father Neptune
+and Sir Solomon Seal.
+
+As they engaged in conversation, they frequently glanced in the
+direction of the children and the smart little Golliwog.
+
+"Did I understand you to say _The Golliwog News_?" whispered Father
+Neptune.
+
+"The Editor?  Dear me!  Give him a seat next to me, and put his
+companions directly opposite."
+
+Before the children had quite recovered from their surprise, an
+officious looking waiter ushered them into the seats Father Neptune
+had indicated, and the banquet began.
+
+Poor Gladys' face was scarlet, and she positively trembled when she
+saw her pet seated so close to the Sea Monarch, but John James
+himself seemed in no wise perturbed.  He listened attentively to
+Father Neptune's suggestion that all future copies of the Underseas
+Edition of _The Golliwog News_ should be printed on waterproof.
+
+"It shall be done, sire," he replied calmly, and went on sipping his
+soup as though he were in the habit of conversing with royalty every
+day in the week.
+
+Immediately upon the conclusion of the luxurious banquet, Professor
+Walruzzio delighted the company by playing selections from the
+"Silvery Waves" on the grand piano, kindly lent by Messrs. Bleak and
+Brill.  Herr Lobster contributed a violin solo, after which Miss
+Shrimp gave a recitation entitled "The Lost Crab," which moved Father
+Neptune and the Lady Mayoress to tears.
+
+Following this, came a very clever exhibition of conjuring by
+Professor Sea Serpent, whose dexterity and skill were truly
+remarkable, and Sir Solomon was heard to whisper, that he hadn't "the
+_faintest_ idea how it was done."  And this admission from so
+distinguished a personage was a great surprise to everyone.
+
+The last item on the programme was a humourous song by Mr. "Merry"
+Codfish, the most celebrated entertainer in Father Neptune's
+dominions.
+
+His favourite song, "The Funniest Fish in the Sea" had gained for him
+the title of "Merry" Codfish, and indeed, as he stood on the raised
+platform at the end of the hall, bowing affably to the audience, our
+young friends decided that never in all their lives had they seen a
+merrier fellow than he.
+
+Professor Walruzzio played a little tinkling prelude, and Mr. "Merry"
+Codfish began.
+
+  THE FUNNIEST FISH IN THE SEA.
+
+  _One day, 'twas many years ago,
+    A fisherman came by,
+  And threw his nice seductive line
+    To capture such as I.
+  "Ha, ha!" I said and smelt the bait,
+    "I fear I cannot stay,
+  But not to disappoint you, sir,
+    I'll eat, and swim away!"_
+
+      _Oh!  I'm a very funny fish
+      Such a funny finny fish,
+        And a funnier never could be.
+      I laugh and I smile,
+      Do gymnastics the while,
+        I'm the funniest fish in the sea!_
+
+  _Then while I nibbled daintily,
+    A Shark stole to my side.
+  "What's that you're gobbling up so fast?"
+    The greedy fellow cried.
+  "Kind sir," said I,--and off I slipped---
+    "Eat heartily I pray,"
+  But as I spoke, the fisherman
+    Did haul his prize away._
+
+      _Oh!  I'm a very funny fish
+      Such a funny finny fish,
+        And a funnier never could be,
+      I left the old Shark
+      To fume in the dark,
+        I'm the funniest fish in the sea!_
+
+  _The Shark, he is a vicious rogue,
+    No friend to you and me.
+  It made me laugh to see him "caught"
+    So very skilfully.
+  And thus a double trick I played,
+    Now, wasn't it a lark?
+  The fisherman had wanted Cod,
+    Instead, he got a Shark._
+
+      _Oh!  I'm a very funny fish
+      Such a funny finny fish,
+        And a funnier never could be.
+      You may laugh till you choke,
+      At my last little joke,--
+        I'm the funniest fish in the sea!_
+
+
+All the fish applauded heartily.  To them it seemed an excellent joke
+that their natural enemy, the Shark, was caught on a line.  And also
+that the fisherman had managed to land a fish he could not possibly
+eat.  Indeed, Mr. "Merry" Codfish may be said to have "brought down
+the house."
+
+There were loud calls for an encore, but the hour was growing late,
+and when they had finished flapping, at a signal from the Mayor, the
+whole company rose and rendered the Fishes' National Anthem, "Long
+live Father Neptune."
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XI.
+
+  How poor John James couldn't stir a peg,
+  Because he had such a bone in his leg.
+  But Gladys and Tommy and Freda go,
+  To see the Teddio-Golliwog Show.
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XI.
+
+AT THE EXHIBITION.
+
+"I shan't be able to go," said John James, "and there's an end of it.
+Ugh!  It's disgusting!"
+
+"What's the matter with you?" asked Gladys.
+
+The Golliwog knitted up his forehead, slid carefully off the table,
+and sitting in one chair, put his feet in another.
+
+"It's my leg," he said at last, nearly twisting his nose off with the
+grimaces he made.
+
+"Well," said Gladys impatiently, "what about it?  I can't see
+anything the matter with it."
+
+"I've got a _bone_ in it," said the Golliwog impressively, "and the
+fact is, I can't go to the Exhibition."
+
+"Oh, dear, you poor old thing!" cried Gladys; "couldn't Freda and
+Tommy and I go without you!  Then you could rest your poor leg, and
+perhaps the bone will come out."
+
+"Well," said John James rather doubtfully, "will you promise to
+remember all the really important things?"
+
+"Of course!" said Gladys, tossing her head; "and I daresay if I
+forget anything Tommy and Freda--why, there they are!  Now we can
+tell them about it."
+
+"Tell us what?" asked Tommy.
+
+"Why, that John James has a bone in his leg, and we three are to go
+without him to the Teddio-Golliwog Exhibition."
+
+"And represent _The Golliwog News_," put in John James, getting out
+his card case, and handing a card to Tommy, telling him at the same
+time to present it at the gate of the Exhibition, or whenever he had
+the least difficulty, and all would be well.
+
+"I want to see the knick-knacks," began Freda, but John James
+interrupted.
+
+"You'll have to go by the G. and T.B. Underground.  I'll show you the
+way," and he climbed out of the window and let himself down by the
+water-shoot.
+
+The three children followed him; they were not a bit afraid, and all
+of them alighted exactly in front of the black telegraph pole.  It
+was zuzzing even then, and had a peculiar tarry smell.  John James
+put his ear to it and listened.
+
+"It's all right," he said.  Then he looked up at the wires overhead,
+and repeated this rhyme:
+
+  "_Little Key, Little Key.
+  Won't you tumble down to me?_"
+
+
+The next minute a little golden key with a diamond in it dropped
+right at their feet.
+
+John James picked it up, fitted it into the pole, turned it, and a
+tiny door flew open, showing a flight of iron steps inside, and a
+board slanting downwards, which said:
+
+  THIS WAY TO THE G.& T.B. UNDERGROUND.
+
+
+"There you are," said the Golliwog.  "In you go.  Mind you bring back
+all the news.  Here's the Key.  Take care of it."
+
+He flung it down the steps after them, banged the door, and left them
+to find their way in the dark.
+
+"How horrid of him!" said Gladys.  "I suppose it's the bone in his
+leg.  Jane gets it sometimes, and she's always cross then.  Isn't it
+dark?  We shall never find that Key."
+
+  "_Yes, you will, if you walk with care,
+  It's lying now on the middle stair,_"
+
+said a voice, a very soft gentle voice too.
+
+"Who's that?" said Gladys.  "Freda where are you?  Tommy, I can't see
+anything."
+
+  "_Oh, never fear
+  For I am still here,_"
+
+continued the soft voice:
+
+  "_And when we come to the middle stair
+  I will remind you to pause just there._"
+
+
+"Thank you very much, I'm sure," said poor Gladys, but she really was
+horribly frightened.  She could hear Freda and Tommy talking and
+laughing below her, and the hand that held hers was such a very
+strange stiff hand.  The soft voice was strange too.  It was not only
+that it spoke in rhyme, but it shot out the words in sudden jerks, as
+if someone were pushing the speaker from behind.
+
+  "_The step at last,
+  Hold the Key fast,_"
+
+said the voice again.
+
+Gladys felt her foot grate against the Key, so she stooped and picked
+it up.
+
+  "_Here we are at the Underground,
+  I hope that the Key is safe and sound,_"
+
+said her companion.
+
+"How she does keep on," muttered Gladys crossly, as she tied the Key
+in a corner of her handkerchief.  Then as they stepped out on to a
+brilliantly lighted platform, Gladys turned to see who it was,
+holding her so firmly by the hand.  And, would you believe it--the
+owner of the soft voice was a Wooden Doll?
+
+She had a sensible face, with a little bit of colour on each cheek,
+and a quantity of black hair smoothed over her ears.  She wore a neat
+little bonnet, a nicely starched print dress, and she carried a brown
+basket with a packet of sandwiches done up in white paper.
+
+Before Gladys could speak, Tommy and Freda rushed up, asking where
+ever she had been.
+
+"Get into the train--get in--do get in!" shouted a funny little
+Golliwog guard, rushing up and waving a green flag.
+
+He bundled the children in first, then popped the Wooden Doll into
+her basket with the sandwiches, and put her up in the rack, which was
+provided for light articles only.  Then he slammed the door, and the
+train started.
+
+"Do help that poor lady down!" began Gladys, but the Doll seemed
+quite unmoved by such strange treatment.  She stepped out of the
+basket, slid down the window curtain, and sat herself by Freda with
+her well starched skirts crackling.
+
+During the journey she confided to the children that her name was
+Selina Starchup, and that she was going to meet her husband at the
+Exhibition.
+
+"We are going to represent _The Golliwog News_," said Tommy,
+producing John James' card.
+
+The Wooden Doll's rosy face went quite white.
+
+  "_I should not thus have calmly sat
+  If I had even dreamed of that!_"
+
+she gasped.
+
+Then speaking very faintly and breathlessly, she told them that her
+husband, who was well acquainted with the newspaper world, thought
+_The Golliwog News_ the most wonderful, and by far the most literary
+production in Golliwog Land.
+
+She added that on one occasion her husband had actually sat near the
+Editor, and considered it the greatest honour of his life that so
+important a personage had actually spoken to him, and had
+condescended to accept an acid drop.
+
+She was so excited that when the train began to slow up she could
+hardly wait for it to stop.  She hung out of the window, waving her
+basket so wildly that the neat little packet of sandwiches would have
+toppled out, and fallen under the train, had not a very fat,
+good-tempered looking Doll rushed up and caught it in both hands.
+
+"Caught out!" cried the new-comer joyously.  "Hullo, Selina!  Come
+along, my dear.  The Exhibition is going full swing.  Are these young
+people coming with you?"
+
+The "young people" stared, for the wooden lady's husband was the very
+identical Fat Doll who had taken his collar off at the Dolls'
+Parliament, and said "Papa" and "Mamma."
+
+  "_Hush, my dear!
+  Your ways are so queer,_"
+
+said his wife reprovingly, and then she told him that Gladys, Tommy,
+and Freda had come to the Exhibition to represent _The Golliwog News_.
+
+The Fat Doll jumped off his feet, he was so much surprised, and when
+he came down again, he was some distance along the platform, where he
+was joined by a tall thin gentleman who carried a Gladstone Bag.
+These two engaged in a very earnest conversation for some minutes and
+then approached the children.
+
+"Allow me to shake hands," cried the new comer.  "You must--you
+really must!  I'll take no refusal."
+
+The little girls shook hands with him, but they could not help
+giggling.  Tommy burst out laughing, a real ringing schoolboy laugh,
+that made the other passengers on the platform look round to see what
+it was all about.  The Fat Doll seemed puzzled, for he began feeling
+round Tommy's waistcoat to see whether he had a string anywhere that
+could be pulled to make him laugh again.
+
+He fumbled and tickled Tommy so much that lie literally shrieked and
+rolled with laughter.
+
+"I say--that's enough!" he cried.  "Let me alone.  Oh, let go!--do!"
+
+The Fat Doll looked at Tommy thoughtfully.
+
+"It's not a string," he cried.  "It must be one of those which you
+press.  I suppose I touched the spring by accident.  It's a very good
+contrivance, any way."
+
+While this was going on the tall thin gentleman had stood by, his
+eyes twinkling with delight.
+
+"I'm out for the day," he cried merrily as the little party moved on.
+"Business is very slack just now.  So I'm taking a holiday."
+
+"You look as if you needed it," said Gladys.  "You are so very thin.
+You must work very hard, I fancy.  What do you do for your living?"
+
+"I'm only a poor Dustman," he answered jovially, swinging his bag
+round and round.
+
+"Nonsense!" cried the children in chorus, laughing heartily.  "You
+don't look a bit like a Dustman."
+
+"Are you a comic entertainer, sir?" asked Tommy.  "I should think you
+would be a splendid one."
+
+"And all the children like you, don't they?" ventured little Freda,
+who had taken such a fancy to him that she was hanging on to his arm
+and looking up into his face.
+
+The Dustman's eyes twinkled.
+
+"Well--no," he admitted.  "I'm not a great favourite, though if they
+only knew it I'm a very good friend to them, and save them from all
+kinds of unpleasant things.  It's the grown-ups who feel glad when I
+put in an appearance.  But don't let us talk about that, I'm out for
+the day, and I want to have a good time.  Here we are at the gate."
+
+Mr. and Mrs. Starchup had already passed through the turnstile.  The
+Dustman appeared to have a season ticket, for he simply nodded to the
+gate-keeper, and passed in.
+
+Tommy produced his press card, and the children were all amused to
+see the look of amazement, mingled with awe, which overspread the
+gate-keeper's face when he read the magic words--_The Golliwog News_.
+
+"Do you want an escort, sir?" he asked Tommy very politely.
+
+"Oh, no,--no!" cried the Dustman.  "I'll show them everything worth
+seeing before my business hours commence," and he hurried them away.
+
+"I must remember to tell John James how the gate-keeper stared," said
+Gladys as they went along, and the words were scarcely out of her
+mouth, before a cat, without a tail, came prancing along on his hind
+legs, waving something in his paw.  He had a tray attached to his
+neck by a strap, and went about so fast that the tray kept swinging
+round and hitting him in the back.
+
+"Ha'penny a packet!" he cried.  "A penny the half-dozen," he said,
+stopping in front of Gladys.
+
+"What is it?" she asked, feeling for a halfpenny.
+
+"Memory Powder," said the cat.  "Highly recommended.  Sole
+proprietor.  Hundreds of unsolicited testimonials," he continued,
+thrusting a packet into Gladys' hand, and rushing off to meet a party
+of Toy Monkeys who had just arrived in a char-a-banc.
+
+"My memory is so bad," began Gladys, "and Jane has said so often that
+I ought to get some memory powder.  I wonder----"
+
+She forgot what she was going to say, for just then they overtook
+Selina and her husband, standing arm in arm looking at the
+Jolly-Woggle.
+
+The Jolly-Woggle was a gigantic see-saw, which woggled in a very
+peculiar way, and made everybody feel jolly.  The Dustman told the
+children that it was recommended by all the doctors in Golliwog Land
+as a splendid remedy for nervous ailments.
+
+"Going on?" cried the Fat Doll.
+
+"Rather!  What do you think?" replied the Dustman, and so when the
+see-saw stopped, they all climbed on, Mr. and Mrs. Starchup on one
+side, and the children and the Dustman on the other.
+
+It was very amusing to watch Selina when the thing began to woggle.
+She tried so hard to sit upright and look dignified, and to keep her
+basket properly balanced.  The Fat Doll bounced up and down like a
+Jack-in-the-Box, and several times the children heard faint cries of
+"Papa" and "Mamma" as they joggled to and fro.
+
+Freda and Gladys clung to the Dustman like leeches, and even Tommy
+was glad to lay hold of his coat tails, the Jolly-Woggle did woggle
+so dreadfully.  But they enjoyed it very much, and were quite sorry
+when it came to a stand still, and they had to get off, because all
+the animals from a Noah's Ark were waiting impatiently to get on.
+
+"How John James would have enjoyed that!" said Gladys, as they walked
+on.
+
+"I do wonder how the bone in his poor leg is getting on."
+
+"Oh, all right, I expect," said Tommy.  "Aren't we going to see the
+Knick-Knacks?"
+
+"Of course we are," said the Dustman and the Fat Doll both together.
+
+"Jane says she can't bear knick-knacks," began Gladys doubtfully,
+looking up at the narrow building, with a perplexed expression on her
+face.
+
+"Nasty dust-traps, she calls them.  Do you think we ought to go?"
+
+"Bother Jane!" said Tommy.  "Of course we're going."
+
+He opened the glass door, and the Dustman, with Freda still clinging
+to his arm, went in.  Gladys followed, then the Fat Doll and his
+wife, who nearly got squeezed to death trying to walk in arm in arm,
+and last of all, Tommy himself entered.
+
+Each knick-knack was in a separate room with its name over the
+entrance.
+
+The first was:
+
+  A STITCH IN TIME.
+
+
+"I've heard that before," said Gladys.  "I think it was Jane who said
+it.  I don't want to see it very much."
+
+"Nonsense!" said Tommy.  "No one can make you do any mending to-day.
+Look!  There's someone who ought to go in," he added, pointing to a
+very ragged Doll.
+
+"She is going in," said the Dustman, and so they all trooped behind
+her.
+
+In the middle of the floor there was an arm-chair, and Father Time
+sat in it.  They knew who he was, because he held an hour glass in
+one hand and a scythe in the other, and looked so very old.
+
+The old fellow smiled and nodded to the Dustman, and asked him to
+give the hourglass a shake on the quiet, for the sand seemed running
+very slowly, and he wanted his dinner.
+
+Of course, the Dustman contrived to do as he was asked, and no one
+but the children saw him, for the Fat Doll and Selina were examining
+the scythe, and the Ragged Dollie was calling for a needle at the top
+of her voice.
+
+Presently a neat little Teddy in a white apron and a cap brought her
+a needle threaded with black cotton, and she then walked up to Father
+Time and put a large stitch in his waistcoat.
+
+"What is she doing that for?" whispered Gladys to Selina.
+
+  "_Just look again
+  And all will be plain,_"
+
+whispered back the Wooden Doll.
+
+The stitches flew in and out on Father Time's coat, and as if by
+magic, for every stitch she made, nine neat little stitches appeared
+in her own ragged garments.  In a very short time she began to look
+quite a Smart Doll, very different from the disreputable creature she
+had seemed on first entering the place.
+
+She smiled amiably at the children, but they did not like her, for as
+she was going out she made a grimace at the Dustman, who only shook
+his bag at her, and grinned.
+
+Father Time was getting irritable.
+
+"I can hear the rattling of the plates," he said.  "I want my dinner."
+
+The children left hastily, in search of the next Knick-Knack, which
+was an ancient instrument known as:
+
+  THE SECOND FIDDLE.
+
+
+It was kept on a white satin cushion, and covered with a glass case,
+and the Toy Elephant in charge of it told them it was the greatest
+curiosity at the Exhibition.
+
+"But why?" asked Tommy.  "It looks quite ordinary to me, only rather
+old and fusty."
+
+"It is so exceedingly wonderful," said the Elephant, slowly and
+patiently, looking at Tommy over the top of his spectacles, "because
+no one has ever been able to play it."
+
+"Has anyone ever tried?" asked the Fat Doll, nudging Tommy in the
+ribs, hoping to make him laugh.
+
+"Of _course_ not!" replied the Elephant indignantly, polishing up the
+glass case with a chamois leather.  "I guard it, sir, most vigilantly
+all day, and at night I sleep with it locked up in my trunk.  And _no
+one_, sir, ever _will_ be able to play it!"
+
+Tommy laughed loudly, which was what the Fat Doll wanted.  Freda and
+the Dustman laughed too, and even Selina giggled in a perfectly
+lady-like manner, but Gladys did not smile.
+
+"I remember Jane once said----" she began, but Tommy turned round and
+looked at her.
+
+"Look here, Gladys, why on earth must you remember every disagreeable
+thing your Jane ever said?"
+
+"I'm sure I don't know," she replied, "I'm generally so forgetful,
+too."
+
+"Why it's the memory powder!" cried the Dustman.  "We ought not to
+have let her buy it."
+
+"Give it to me," said Tommy, and seizing the packet he went to a
+window and threw it out as far as he could.
+
+The children then passed on to the next room over which they saw the
+mysterious words:
+
+  THE LITTLE PITCHERS.
+
+
+These Little Pitchers stood in a row against the wall.  They were ten
+in number, and their ears were very long; but in spite of this, a
+cross-faced Golliwog was walking round them, pulling their ears to
+make them grow longer still.
+
+"Doesn't it hurt?" said Gladys, to the smallest of the Little
+Pitchers.
+
+"Hurt?" replied the poor little thing.  "Rather!  I should just think
+it does."
+
+"But how did your ears get long to start with?" asked Tommy curiously.
+
+"Well"--the Little Pitcher looked rather ashamed--"I used to listen
+about at doors, when grown-up people were talking, and er--er--my
+ears began to grow, and they have been getting longer ever since.
+It's awful.  I can hear the flies walking about on the ceiling.  The
+smallest sound seems like thunder.  That bluebottle fly on the wall
+over there, can't you hear him?  He's stamping along, like--Old
+Boots!--Oh, there he is!"
+
+The Little Pitcher shut his eyes, and put a tea cosy over both ears
+and would not speak any more.
+
+The children looked round to see what could have upset him, and they
+saw coming towards them on tiptoe the strangest little old person you
+ever imagined.
+
+"My name is Boots," he remarked in a thin piping voice, "and I am
+usually known as Old Boots."
+
+"Are you a real person?" asked Freda.  "Dad often says he has been
+working like Old Boots.  Was that you?"
+
+"It was," said the old gentleman looking very pleased with himself.
+"Some people fight like Old Boots, or hurry like Old Boots----"
+
+"Or _squeak_ like Old Boots," added the Dustman slyly, and at this
+our merry little party laughed again, and the Fat Doll turned a
+somersault.
+
+But the old man went off offended, piping to himself, like--just like
+Old Boots!
+
+"Now," said the Dustman, picking up his Gladstone Bag.  It's six
+o'clock.  I have just one hour left before I start business again, so
+we'd better all go and have some tea, and then we might have a look
+round the Magic Corridor."
+
+Off they went to a celebrated tea house called "The Lions' Share."
+It was kept by a large family of Toy Lions.  They were very obliging
+creatures, and if you wanted anything, and could not catch the
+waiter's eye, all you had to do was to pull his tail, and he brought
+you whatever you happened to fancy.
+
+Tea being over--and a very merry meal it was--our friends went to the
+Magic Corridor, where they found a most fascinating automatic machine.
+
+All you did--as the Dustman explained--was to peep in, turn the
+handle, and think of an absent friend, when immediately you saw in
+the machine an animated picture, which told you what the friend was
+doing at that precise moment.
+
+"I should like to look in first," said Gladys, "because I do so badly
+want to know what John James is doing, and how the bone in his leg is
+getting on."
+
+And seizing the handle, she peered through the glass.
+
+"Can you see him?" asked Freda.
+
+"Ye-es," said Gladys after a pause; then she added: "He is writing at
+the nursery table.  He seems to have a huge pile of letters beside
+him.  What can he be doing?"
+
+"Oh, now he has finished them, and is stretching his back.  Poor old
+thing!  I expect it aches.  Ah, now he is sticking down the
+envelopes.  Oh, my!  What a pile!  And now, if he isn't even running
+to the pillar box.  Running ever so fast----"
+
+Gladys turned the handle very quickly.
+
+"And he told me he had a bone in his leg!  It must have been a story.
+Oh, dear!  Oh, dear!  I shall go home this very minute and see----"
+
+She dropped the handle, and ran down the Magic Corridor, with Tommy
+and Freda at her heels.  On--on--till they reached the G. & T.B.
+Underground.
+
+"Well, I must be off," said the Dustman, shouldering his Gladstone
+Bag, and he too hurried away.
+
+"Look!" said the Fat Doll, as he and his thin wife walked leisurely
+down the Corridor.  "The little lady has dropped something."
+
+The "something" was a handkerchief.  He picked it up, and was putting
+it in his pocket when a small round object fell out, with a slight
+clatter.
+
+It was the Magic Key!
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XII
+
+  The most illustrious G.N.
+    Now gives a Christmas party.
+  We meet our merry friends again
+    With smiles and handshakes hearty.
+  But, oh! their faces were so glum
+    When the last guest of all had come!
+
+
+
+CHAPTER XII.
+
+THE CHRISTMAS PARTY.
+
+"Now, what I want to know is," said Gladys, looking very earnestly at
+John James, "what did you find to do while we were at the Exhibition?"
+
+"I was very busy," said the Golliwog.
+
+"Yes, I daresay," Gladys frowned, and tapped impatiently on the
+table, "but what were you doing?
+
+"I suppose I shall have to tell you," said John James, "you're such a
+one for finding out things.  I'm going--I mean _The Golliwog News_ is
+going--to have a Christmas party."
+
+"Oh, John James, are you really?"
+
+Gladys' eyes sparkled, as she jumped up and ran to him.
+
+"And were you sending out--I mean--would you like me to write the
+invitations for you?"
+
+"No, thanks.  I've sent them.  The special ones, that is.  I've
+issued a general invitation to all our readers."
+
+"Oh-oh!  But _The Golliwog News_ has such a _tremendous_
+circulation," said Gladys doubtfully.  "Selina said so.  You'll never
+find room for everybody."
+
+"Yes, we shall."
+
+And for once, John James forgot his dignity, and seizing Gladys' hand
+he waltzed her round the table, shouting:
+
+"The more the merrier!  _The Golliwog News_ for ever!
+Hooray--hooray!"
+
+"Goodness!  What a noise!" cried Tommy, bursting into the nursery.
+"Gladys and John James have gone mad!" he exclaimed loudly to Freda
+who followed close behind him.
+
+For a moment the two children stood aghast upon the threshold, then
+the impromptu waltz came to an abrupt finish.  Gladys rushed to
+welcome her friends and told them the astounding news.
+
+"John James is going to have a Christmas party."
+
+"Scrumptious!" said Tommy.  "Who's coming?"
+
+"All the readers of _The Golliwog News_."
+
+"That's us, then," remarked Thomas cheerfully, and he plied John
+James with questions, till the Golliwog stopped his ears and would
+say nothing but "Wait and see."
+
+"Will Mr. Merry Codfish come?"
+
+"Wait and see."
+
+"Have you asked Father Neptune?"
+
+"Wait and see."
+
+"Is Cock Robin coming--and Peter Bunney--and Thomas Purr-Catt--and
+Sir Solomon Seal?"
+
+"_Wait and see!_" roared John James.  "They're all invited, but we
+shan't know till they arrive whether they are coming or not."
+
+"Let him alone, Tommy," said Gladys, "or perhaps he won't let us
+three come.  I shall wear my best frock.  What shall you wear, Freda?"
+
+"My Bo-Peep dress," said Freda, and then the children began an
+animated conversation on what proved to be an inexhaustible subject,
+and lasted till the very day of the party.
+
+On that auspicious afternoon, which was also Christmas Eve, John
+James had brushed his unruly hair till it stood bolt upright.  With
+his eye-glasses set on the extreme end of his funny little nose, he
+looked a very important person indeed as he waited at the nursery
+door to receive his guests.
+
+Carlo and Spottikins were deputed to open the front door and show the
+arrivals upstairs between them.
+
+Peter Bunney was the first to arrive, with his ear trumpet in a green
+baize bag.  Spottikins and Carlo both accompanied him upstairs as
+neither of them could decide to stay below, in case they lost any of
+the fun.
+
+"Mr. Peter--" said Carlo.
+
+"--Bunney!" added Spottikins quickly, and in tumbled Peter, knocking
+John James' eye-glasses clean off his nose, as he swung his bag over
+his shoulder.
+
+"Came early!" he gasped, "so as not to miss anybody.  Plush-Mole's
+coming by the Underground.  Too slow for me.  That's my ear trumpet,"
+he added, indicating the green bag.  "I thought it might be taken for
+a musical instrument, and it was!  I heard a passenger on the G. &
+T.B.R. say: 'My deah!  It's Professor Rabizzio.  Ha! ha! ha!'"
+
+"Good joke!" cried Tommy, shaking with laughter as he took the
+trumpet out of the bag.  "Very good joke."
+
+"Choke?--did you say choke?" cried Peter excitedly.  "Pat him on the
+back!  Quick!"
+
+He snatched the trumpet out of Tommy's hand and was beginning to
+pummel him with it, when Sir Solomon and Lady Seal arrived.
+
+"Pray come in," said John James stepping forward to welcome them.
+Lady Seal smiled graciously, and sat down beside Tommy.  Her brown
+satin dress brushed against his coat and gave him the shivers, so he
+afterwards declared.
+
+Mr. William Dogg, M.P., and Mr. Henry Toad, M.P., arrived arm in arm.
+Close on their heels Professor Sea Serpent came in very briskly,
+carrying a large valise full of eye-glasses, which he hastily
+distributed among the guests, explaining that he thought this was an
+opportunity not to be lost, as it might lead to business some day.
+
+Now Cock Robin hopped up the stairs, and tripping over Sir Solomon's
+tail, entered the nursery with great _éclat_.
+
+"Is the Dove coming?" whispered Freda, to the smart little bird.
+"Oh, I hope so."
+
+"Yes, if she can get dressed," returned the Robin.  "She wanted to
+come in my motor, but I couldn't wait while she fixed her last
+feather.  She's just behind."
+
+And this proved to be the case, for the next minute she came in with
+the Sparrow, who absolutely refused to let Carlo take his cane or his
+bowler hat.  He preferred, he said, to look after them himself.
+
+Mortimer Max and Jolly Jack were heard to say that they should like
+to turn the bounder out, but just then the Keeper of the Money Box
+came in, and they forgot the fussy little Sparrow.
+
+The K.M.B. was a cheerful looking Golliwog, and he had the Money Box
+under his arm.  Not that there was anything in it--he carefully
+explained--but it would be such a dreadful thing if it happened to
+get lost, because, of course, if there were no Money Box to Keep, he
+would be bound to lose his job.
+
+Quite a troop of guests arrived now.
+
+John James grew rosy with excitement, and the children rushed to and
+fro, talking to the extremely funny folk, who seemed bent on wishing
+themselves and everybody else "A Merry Christmas."
+
+Father Neptune, Mr. Merry Codfish, Mr. Thomas Purr-Catt, M.P., and a
+melancholy Billikins, all arrived together, and were suitably
+received by John James.  After that there was a terrific noise below,
+then a sound as if a small army was marching up the stairs.
+
+"What can it be?" cried Lady Seal nervously, taking out a bottle of
+Eau de Cologne and dabbing her face with it.
+
+"Not robbers, I hope!" said Father Neptune jovially, beaming on
+everyone as he spoke.
+
+The stampede came nearer.  Suddenly music struck up, and then the
+Frogland Brass Band came marching in, playing "Land of Bogs and
+Marshes."  They arranged themselves near the fireplace, where Mr.
+Henry Toad, with his thumbs stuck in his waistcoat pockets, was
+having a heated argument with Mr. Thomas Purr-Catt.
+
+[Illustration: "THERE NEVER WAS SUCH A CHRISTMAS PARTY BEFORE NOR
+SINCE."]
+
+"My dear, sir, what the working frog really wants, is----"
+
+The rest of the sentence was lost, for the guests were still arriving
+in droves, and John James now suggested a game of musical chairs to
+fill in time till everybody had come.
+
+The Frogland Brass Band kindly obliged with a spirited rendering of
+"The Sea-Shells of Fish Town."  The last traces of shyness very
+quickly vanished, and the guests leaped and danced, and hopped and
+flopped round the chairs with alarming velocity.
+
+The game proceeded in the usual way, until only Lady Seal and Tommy
+were left marching round the last chair.
+
+Tommy had rather enjoyed the game, but Lady Seal was so very fat,
+that when the music suddenly stopped, she lost her balance, tried to
+recover herself by clutching at Tommy's jacket, and finally fell
+sprawling, with Tommy and the chair on the top of her.
+
+Sir Solomon was laughing so much at his wife's exploits that he could
+scarcely help her to rise.  When, however, she was comfortably
+settled in a corner of the sofa, and the Dove had lent her a bottle
+of smelling salts, John James asked Professor Sea Serpent if he would
+favour the company with a few conjuring tricks.
+
+This request was loudly applauded, and though, at first, the
+Professor protested that he had forgotten--absolutely forgotten--all
+the tricks he ever knew, he was presently prevailed upon to take up
+his stand at one end of the nursery, with a small table in front of
+him.
+
+Bowing very low, he first asked whether any gentleman had brought
+such a thing as an ear trumpet.
+
+"Yes," said the Sparrow officiously, and without so much as saying
+"By your leave," he seized Peter Bunney's trumpet and handed it up to
+the conjuror.
+
+"And now," proceeded Professor Sea Serpent, "will any gentleman lend
+me a bowler hat?"
+
+"Here!  Here!" cried Peter, taking the Sparrow's hat out of his claw
+before anyone could speak.
+
+"Here's a hat!  Here's a hat!"
+
+He glared at the Sparrow, and the Sparrow glared back at him.
+
+The Professor then asked John James if he could be accommodated with
+a screen, and the ingenious Golliwog, assisted by Tommy, fixed up a
+clothes horse and threw the nursery tablecloth over it.
+
+The Sea Serpent now borrowed Lady Seal's handkerchief, and much to
+her dismay he tore it into little bits and put it in the trumpet.
+This he carefully placed under the hat, and invited Mr. Sparrow to
+step up and assist him with the trick.  That gentleman showed great
+reluctance, but he was pushed forward by Mr. Peter Bunney, and
+finally consented to hide himself behind the screen.
+
+The conjuror removed the hat and picked up the trumpet.  He held it
+aloft for a moment, whistled into it, gave it a little shake, and out
+fluttered Mr. Sparrow with Lady Seal's handkerchief safe and sound in
+his beak.
+
+How the audience cheered and stamped, while the Professor bowed
+himself into hoops!  When the clamour had subsided, he said he would
+just do one more trick, and borrowing Mr. Thomas Purr-Catt's
+eye-glass, he suggested that this time Mr. Peter Bunney should be his
+assistant.
+
+Peter did not want to go, but the Sparrow and several others near by
+entered into the spirit of the joke and pushed him behind the screen.
+
+Professor Sea Serpent held up the borrowed eyeglass to the full view
+of his audience, then with a sudden swish of his tail, which made
+everybody jump, he smashed it into little bits, and put the fragments
+into Mr. Sparrow's hat.
+
+Mr. Purr-Catt tried to appear unconcerned, but Gladys noticed that
+his tail was swinging furiously.
+
+The Professor waved the hat to and fro, covered it with a black
+cloth, repeated some magic words, and lo and behold, Mr. Peter Bunney
+popped out of the hat with the eyeglass, well polished and with a new
+chain on it, in his eye!
+
+Thomas purred with satisfaction when he got it back safely, and the
+company laughed and clapped till they were tired.
+
+Mr. Bunney wiped his trumpet very carefully, and put it back in the
+bag, saying he was afraid he should never be able to use it again;
+and Mr. Sparrow asked Father Neptune in a loud whisper, whether he
+knew of a really good disinfectant because if not he should have to
+join the hatless brigade.
+
+John James now asked Mr. Merry Codfish to sing, and immediately all
+the guests clamoured for "The Funniest Fish in the Sea."
+
+Mr. Codfish, who had been sucking a voice jujube all the evening, now
+removed it, and stood upon the Money Box.  Then bowing very
+gracefully, he sang his favourite song in his best style.
+
+Just as the applause was dying down, and everyone was feeling very
+merry, there was a sort of shuffle outside the door, and Carlo
+announced "Mr. Hairy Octopus."
+
+He was the very Octopus who _would_ stretch himself when the
+procession at Fish Town was going by.
+
+To-day, however, he appeared to be very much subdued, for he kept his
+arms close to his sides, replied to John James' greeting in a hoarse
+whisper, and sat down on the ear trumpet.
+
+Freda helped him up again, and found him a hassock to sit upon, and
+he was so very grateful that she asked him whether he happened to
+have seen the Dustman anywhere.
+
+The Octopus had perched himself on the very edge of the hassock, and
+he shuffled nervously as he replied:
+
+"I?  No.  Not at all.  He won't surely be here yet."
+
+Lady Seal giggled:
+
+"Poor fellow!" she whispered.  "How nervous he is.  But then, he's
+all arms and legs."
+
+"I hope the Dustman is coming," repeated Freda loudly.  "He is such a
+very delightful person."
+
+The Octopus stared at her.  Then he chuckled as if she had said
+something funny.  Before she could ask what it was, John James held
+up his hand.
+
+"Hark!" he said.  "I can hear something."
+
+He rushed to the window, threw it open and leaned out.  It was a fine
+starry night, clear and cold, and a curious whirr-whirr could be
+distinctly heard.
+
+Everyone who could find room followed John James' example, and hung
+out of the window to see what it was.  Gladys and Father Neptune were
+in the front row, while Freda and the Octopus pressed close behind
+them.  Thomas Purr-Catt, Peter Bunney, and Mr. Merry Codfish craned
+their necks to the utmost, but poor Tommy who had Lady Seal clinging
+to his arm brought up the rear, and could not see anything at all.
+
+The whirr came nearer.
+
+"Ah!" cried John James suddenly, for a twinkling light like a moving
+star was gradually descending, and in a few minutes the eager crowd
+of excited folk could plainly see that an aeroplane was rapidly
+approaching.
+
+Nearer and nearer it came, until they could see that the shape of it
+was something like a huge sleigh, with carved heads of reindeer upon
+the propellers, and standing in the midst of it was an old, old man
+with flowing garments and a long white beard.
+
+"Father Christmas!" shrieked Freda and Gladys together.  "Oh, it is!
+It is!  Father Christmas himself!"
+
+A shout went up from all the guests, a mighty cheer, ringing out into
+the still frosty air, "Father Christmas!"
+
+Then the aeroplane descended, Father Christmas anchored it to the
+window sill, and a host of eager hands were outstretched to pull him
+in.
+
+There was still another surprise in store.  Father Neptune had been
+keenly interested in the proceedings, and suddenly he startled
+everybody by shouting at the very top of his voice:
+
+"Welcome, Brother Christmas!"
+
+"Dear me!  Dear me!" cried Father Christmas.  "So it is!  My long
+lost--but never forgotten--Brother Neptune."
+
+And the two old men fell on each other's necks and executed a sort of
+two-step.  It was so many, many years since they had met!
+
+All this time a loud commotion had been going on outside.
+
+"Bless my heart!" said Father Christmas, turning to John James.  "You
+really must forgive me, sir.  I quite forgot it.  I have a party of
+your guests with me, and they can't get out.  Ha! ha!  I was starting
+on my usual rounds, and offered them a free passage.  Never travelled
+by air in their lives before.  Locked 'em in my sack, or some of 'em
+would have been jumping overboard.  Will somebody lift my sack in?"
+
+Of course everyone ran to the window again, and here the Octopus was
+really useful, for he wrapped his arms and legs round the bulky
+thing, and dragged it in by main force.
+
+The din was horrible.  Such a shrieking and calling from the Toys
+locked in the bag, while Father Christmas fumbled in all his pockets.
+He drew out pieces of string, nails, five glass marbles, a knife with
+a corkscrew in it, half an apple and a piece of orange peel--because
+he was still a boy at heart--but no key!
+
+"I must have lost it," he said at last.  "And it's a very special
+lock.  It can't be forced.  What are we going to do?"
+
+The whole party crowded round the sack, and such a hub-hub took place
+that Father Neptune stopped up his ears, and Sir Solomon called
+"Order!  Order!"
+
+No one seemed aware that two more guests had just come.  It was
+Gladys who first saw them.  Selina Starchup and her husband were
+standing before her, and the Fat Doll held out a tiny embroidered
+handkerchief.
+
+"You dropped it at the Exhibition," he said.
+
+"Thank you," said Gladys, and as she took it, she felt a small hard
+substance in the corner.
+
+In an instant she knew what it was.
+
+"John James!" she called across the room.  "John James, here's the
+Magic Key!"
+
+"Hurrah!  Hurrah!" shouted the Golliwog.
+
+"Hip-hip-Hooray!" cried the hilarious guests.  "The Magic Key will
+open any lock."
+
+Quick as thought, Father Christmas fitted it into the lock, and out
+popped a Teddy Bear, then a Golliwog, followed by a crowd of Dolls,
+ever so many Toy Monkeys, an Elephant, a fat Camel eating dates, and
+a Jack-in-the-Box.
+
+Then there was a chorus of _How-do-you-do's_ and
+_Pleased-to-meet-you's_!
+
+The Fat Doll pirouetted round the room, while Selina clung to her
+husband's coat tails, trying vainly to subdue his high spirits.
+
+"Let me go!" he cried.  "Let me go my dear!  I'm out at a party.  A
+real Christmas party, and no mistake!"
+
+"I can't stop long," remarked Father Christmas, "I've got a lot to do
+to-night.  Don't mention the word Stocking to me, or I shall be off
+like a shot."
+
+"Christmas seems to be a busy time to so many people," whispered
+Freda to Gladys.  "You see, that dear Dustman hasn't come after all."
+
+"Hush!" said Gladys.  "Listen to John James."
+
+"You must really stay to supper," the Editor was telling Father
+Christmas.  Then he rang the bell, and when Carlo appeared, he
+requested that supper should be served immediately.
+
+"It's ready now, sir," said Carlo, polishing a spoon on the front of
+his waistcoat.
+
+So everybody trooped into the next room where a long table was set
+out with every kind of appetising fare.
+
+A huge Christmas Tree, hung with lighted candles, was in the middle
+of the room, and from the top of the Tree trailed a red and white
+streamer, bearing across it in large letters the familiar words:
+
+  THE GOLLIWOG NEWS.
+
+
+Father Neptune and Father Christmas sat side by side.  John James
+occupied the head of the table with Gladys on his right hand and Lady
+Seal on his left, and the other guests arranged themselves as they
+liked.
+
+There never was such a Christmas party before nor since.  Crackers
+were pulled, jokes were cracked.  Father Neptune related a long
+rambling story about a young Periwinkle he had once known, and Father
+Christmas capped it with another, about a careless Comet who lost his
+tail.
+
+When full justice had been done to the costly viands, and the
+pleasant meal drew to a close, Father Neptune rose and proposed a
+toast--"_Success to the Golliwog News_," which was heartily received,
+and drunk by all present, in salt water or fresh, according to
+personal taste.
+
+Then John James rose to reply.
+
+It was a curious scene.  The light from the hundreds of candles
+flared upon the eager faces of the guests as they turned towards the
+talented and gifted Editor.
+
+"Beloved friends and supporters of _The Golliwog News_----"
+
+He paused, for the door was suddenly thrown open, and a tall, thin
+individual carrying a Gladstone Bag, came in.
+
+"The _dear_ Dustman!" cried Freda, jumping up to welcome him.
+
+But consternation was written upon the faces of the guests.
+
+"Not yet!  Not yet!" they cried in chorus.
+
+"We aren't nearly ready for you yet!"
+
+For answer, the Dustman began to extinguish the candles.
+
+Dimmer and Dimmer grew the room, until only the light of the last
+candle flickered on the merry face of Father Christmas.
+
+Then the Dustman put it out.
+
+
+
+THE END.
+
+
+
+  GIBBS AND SONS, 42 & 43 PALACE STREET,
+  CANTERBURY.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+SPECIAL EDITION.
+
+The Golliwog News
+
+Circulating in Toy-Town-on-Sea, Dolls House City, Kitten Town,
+Poodleton, Birdland City and Fish Town.
+
+SPECIAL SUPPLEMENT.
+
+Messrs. S. W. Partridge and Co., Old Bailey, London, E.C.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+LOST.
+
+LOST--The Magic Key, in the grounds of the Teddio-Golliwog
+Exhibition.  Finder returning same to Miss Gladys will be rewarded.
+
+LOST--By the Chief Mermaid in the procession at Fish Town, a very
+valuable brush and comb.  Finder will be suitably recompensed.
+
+FATHER TIME offers to add fifty years to the age of any person giving
+information that will lead to the capture of the thief who stole his
+hour glass while he was having dinner at the Exhibition.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+MISCELLANEOUS.
+
+VISITORS to Toy Town-on-Sea can get good teas and dinners at the
+Hotel Golliwog, near the Sea Front.
+
+SECOND Edition.--"The Needs of the Working Frog," by Henry Toad,
+Esq., M.P.--Copies on application to the Author, 67, Marshgate,
+Frogland.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+MUSICAL.
+
+MR. BARKER PUPP teaches Singing and Voice Production by entirely new
+methods; visits and bites pupils.  Moonlight sonatas in three
+lessons.--153, Growl Lane, Poodleton.
+
+MR. MERRY CODFISH, the efficient finny entertainer is open to accept
+a limited number of engagements for parties, etc.--Apply, 16,
+Mackeral Row, Scaly Plaice, Fish Town.
+
+COPIES of all Songs sung by Mr. Merry Codfish and Mr. Barker Pupp can
+be obtained at Messrs. Bleak and Brill's Music Stores, Fish Town.
+
+FROGLAND Brass Band comprising forty members has a few dates vacant
+for select parties.--Apply, Bandmaster, Frogland.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+ARTICLES WANTED.
+
+WANTED to Purchase cheaply, a Second-hand Watering Can.--Write, in
+first instance, "Poor Papa," Office of this Paper.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+BUSINESSES, PARTNERSHIPS, ETC.
+
+MILK Business for Sale--Good reason for selling (no
+customers)--Apply, Mrs. Catt, Mew Road, Kitten Town.
+
+PARTNERSHIP.--Teddy Bear capitalist wanted with 5d., to join another
+in putting on the market a novelty which will sell at sight.--Box
+464, Golliwog News.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+PERSONAL.
+
+WILL the pretty Polliwog in picture hat who sat next to Teddy Bear at
+the Dolls Opera House last night please write to T.B., c/o Golliwog
+News.
+
+WILL any eye witnesses who saw large Octopus pushing Lemon Soles
+through plate glass window after the Royal procession at Fish Town,
+kindly communicate with Messrs. Shark and Shark, Solicitors, Fish
+Town.
+
+WANTED to borrow 2d. by business Billikins in financial difficulties;
+good security given, in confidence.--Box 1229, Golliwog News.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+APARTMENTS.
+
+TOY Town-on-Sea.--Comfortable Apartments, five minutes from Railway
+Station, close to sea; tide washes kitchen windows twice
+daily.--Terms, Stamp, "Sea View."
+
+LODGINGS to Let for two respectable Teddies, who would be willing to
+share the same cup and saucer; every comfort.--Box 3764, Golliwog
+News.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+ARTICLES FOR SALE.
+
+EAR TRUMPET for disposal, owner having no further use for same; would
+exchange for all old numbers of the Golliwog News.--Apply, P.B. "The
+Burrows."
+
+GENT'S HAT for Sale, good as new.  Apply, personally, to Mr. Sparrow,
+Hall-in-the-Wood, Birdland City.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+SITUATIONS VACANT.
+
+PLAIN Pollywog Cook wanted, the plainer the better; no windows, no
+boots, no knives, no washing, no followers, no day out, no
+wages.--Apply, Mrs. Jolly Jack, "The Nest," Dolls House City.
+
+ENERGETIC Teddy (just leaving school) wanted as Office Boy, must keep
+face clean.  Apply, W. P. Mole, 16, High Street, Dolls House City.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+SITUATIONS WANTED.
+
+REFORMED Shark seeks post as Footman, speaks good English; could
+buttle if required.--Write, R.S., Golliwog News Office.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+  CAN YOU
+  READ
+  THIS?
+  If not, consult:
+  PROFESSOR SEE SERPENT,
+  EYE SPECIALIST.
+  No. 15, Periwinkle Street, Fish Town.
+
+  Visits Dolls House City every
+  Friday.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+  HALL-IN-THE-WOOD.
+
+  The Most Up-to-Date
+  and spacious
+  Playhouse in Birdland City.
+
+  EVERY NIGHT, AT 8.15,
+  The Management will present:
+
+  Who Killed Cock Robin?
+
+  A Drama in Two Acts.
+
+  Box Office open 10 a.m. to 6 p.m.
+  Times and Prices as usual.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+  GOLLIWOG & TEDDY BEAR
+  RAILWAY.
+
+  DAY AT THE SEASIDE.
+
+  On Wednesday Next
+
+  A
+  CHEAP EXCURSION
+  will be run as under to
+  TOY-TOWN-ON-SEA,
+
+  from the under-mentioned
+  Stations:--
+
+  Dolls House City . . .  8. 1
+  Kitten Town  . . . . .  8. 8
+  Poodleton  . . . . . .  8.16
+
+    Arriving at:
+  Toy-Town . . . . . . . 10. 5
+  Return Train . . . . .  9.15
+
+  No Paper Bags or other Luggage
+  allowed.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+  WILLIAM DOGG & CO.
+
+  Under Distinguished Patronage.
+
+  RAT AND VERMIN
+  DESTROYERS.
+
+  Premises Visited . . . Advice
+  given.
+  Large Staff of Worriers kept.
+  Warranted to Worry Well.
+
+  Telegrams: Worryem,
+  THE KENNELS, WEST DOGTON.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+  GOLLIWOG CUP FINAL.
+
+  KITTEN TOWN
+  versus
+  POODLETON,
+  on the
+  Dolls House City Ground.
+
+  Kick-Off at 3.30 p.m.
+
+  Special Excursions from all parts
+  by the G. & T. B. R.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+  W. PLUSH MOLE,
+
+  DEALER in all kinds of FURS.
+
+  _Note the Address_--
+  No. 16, HIGH STREET,
+  DOLLS HOUSE CITY.
+
+  Reached from all parts by the
+  G. & T.B. Underground.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+  TEDDIO-GOLLIWOG
+
+  EXHIBITION
+
+  Lighted by Ten Thousand Lanterns.
+
+  OPEN ALL DAY AND ALL NIGHT.
+
+  See THE SECOND FIDDLE
+  See THE LITTLE PITCHERS
+  See THE JOLLYWOGGLE
+  See THE MAGIC CORRIDOR
+
+  DOLLS HOUSE CITY.
+
+  Special Excursions from all Parts
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+  TRY OUR FAMOUS
+
+  Mouse-Scented Soap:
+
+  "LICK-LICK."
+
+  Awarded Gold Medal in Teddio-
+  Golliwog Exhibition.
+
+  SPECIALLY RECOMMENDED
+  FOR
+
+  PERSIANS.
+
+  Fur Will not Roll on the Tongue.
+  Clean, Comfortable, and Catty.
+
+  THOMAS PURR-CAT & CO.,
+    Soap Makers,
+      Tabby Row,
+        KITTEN TOWN.
+
+  Telegrams: Toiletmadeasy.
+  Telephone: 1044, Catter Waul.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+TIME TABLE.
+
+GOLLIWOG AND TEDDY BEAR RAILWAY.
+
+
+  Dolls House City   7. 5  *7.55   8.50  †11. 0  1.20   3.30   6.40   9.20
+  Frogland           7.11   8. 1   8.57   10. 7  1.28   3.37   6.48   9.27
+  Kitten Town        7.19   8.10   9. 4   10.15  1.38   3.48   6.56   9.34
+  Poodleton          7.29   8.19   9.13    ...   1.49   3.58   7. 7   9.43
+  West Dogton        7.42   8.32   9.27     A    2. 4  ‡4.13  ‡7.23   9.57
+  Birdland City      7.59   8.40   9.35    ...   2.13   4.22   7.32  10. 5
+  Fish Town          9.17  11.50  12. 0    1.10  4.43   6.21   S.S.   9.55
+  Toy Town           9.20  11.53   ...     2.15  5.10   6.40   ...   10. 0
+
+  * Market train.
+  † Express.
+  ‡ Saturdays only.
+
+A Stops to Pick up passengers for Toy Town.
+
+S.S. Stops at Fish Town on Sats.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+The Golliwog News.
+
+  OFFICE:
+  DOLLS HOUSE CITY.
+
+POLLYWOG'S WEAKNESS.
+
+MUCH TOO FOND OF JAM.
+
+A Pollywog was summoned at the Dolls House City Petty Sessions to-day
+for stealing jam from Miss Freda Morris' Nursery Stores.
+
+Mr. Jolly Jack described how he found a jammy spoon on the stairs,
+afterwards tracing the jam to a jar under the Pollywog's bed.
+
+The prisoner sobbed bitterly and said she had no father or mother.
+She admitted that she was very fond of jam, and that she was
+accustomed to sit up in bed and eat it with a spoon.
+
+Mr. Justice Max said she would be sent to a Training Home for Young
+Polliwogs.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+THE DOLLS' PARLIAMENT
+
+REGRETTABLE INCIDENT.
+
+Dolls' Nursing Bill Passed
+
+There was great excitement at the Dolls' Parliament last night, when
+the Nursing of Dolls Bill became law, and it will interest our
+readers to know that it is now a punishable offence to nurse a Doll
+for more than two hours at a time.
+
+There was a large and fashionable gathering present to watch the
+closing stages.
+
+Mr. Henry Toad, the Member for East Frogland, croaked to such good
+purpose that he carried all the Members of the Froggie benches with
+him.
+
+Mr. Toad is a polished gentleman of the world, and his croakings were
+listened to with much interest.
+
+Mr. Thomas Purr-Cat mewed very lustily in favour of the Bill.
+
+It will be remembered that Mr. Purr-Cat was recently returned for
+Kitten Town with a large majority, chiefly because of the views he
+held on fish.
+
+A regrettable incident took place when Mr. William Dogg, head of the
+well-known firm of rat-worriers, put forward remarks which caused
+considerable disturbance in the House.
+
+It was resented by all parties that Mr. Dogg apparently desired to
+use his undoubted gifts for an unlawful purpose.
+
+The objectionable statement being withdrawn, order was very quickly
+restored, but it was noted that as Mr. Dogg sat down he wore a
+"worried" look.
+
+The Member for Dolls House City (Mr. Mortimer Max) made the speech of
+the evening.  He asserted boldly that Miss Gladys had a habit of
+slapping him on the head.
+
+This lady, who was present and heard the statement, threatened to
+settle with him later, but whether she has done so or not our
+representatives have been unable to find out.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+FATALITY AT FISH TOWN.
+
+CHEAP JACK EATEN
+
+"Reformed" Shark's Rash Act.
+
+MILITARY CALLED OUT.
+
+[FROM OUR OWN CORRESPONDENT.]
+
+FISH TOWN.
+
+A shocking fatality occurred at Fish Town to-day.
+
+The "Reformed" Shark has killed and eaten the Cheap Jack, and
+absconded with the recipe for making the famous Seaweed Cough Juice.
+
+Last night he first alarmed the Cheap Jack by approbating and
+adorning himself with that gentleman's cheap jewellery.
+
+Then he swallowed the remaining bottles of cough mixture and attacked
+and robbed the Cheap Jack of the valuable recipe.
+
+Having secured the recipe he calmly made a meal of the unfortunate
+Pike, and then left the town before suspicions were aroused.
+
+The First Battalion Walrus Dragoons (King Neptune's Own) were ordered
+out immediately and are now in hot pursuit.  "Fighting" Lobbs has
+also received instructions to hold his regiment in readiness if
+called upon.
+
+The departure of the Crab Guards from Fish Town to Dolls House City
+has also been indefinitely postponed, and the Mounted Plaice are
+being rapidly mobilized.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+THREE LOST BROTHERS
+
+  AND THEIR HAPPY
+  RE-UNION.
+
+Our many readers will be glad to know that the recent Christmas
+party, given by the "Golliwog News" served at least one very useful
+purpose.  We refer to the meeting of Father Christmas and Father
+Neptune--the long lost brothers.
+
+It is a source of great satisfaction to us to know that we have been
+able to perform such a great public service.  These very interesting
+and widely known old fellows had not met since their infancy, and
+their meeting was a very affecting one.
+
+The near relationship of these famous old gentlemen will come as a
+complete surprise, but we have still another extraordinary
+circumstance to disclose.
+
+We have since learnt that Father Time is also a member of the very
+same family, and if he had not been prevented from attending our
+party, owing to a very bad attack of gout, the three of them would
+have met under our roof.
+
+We are glad to state, however, that they have met together entirely
+as a result of the enquiries we set afoot, and have celebrated their
+re-union with a sort of "house warming" or "wake."
+
+It is most unique that three members of one family should rise to
+such eminence in the land, and we have great pleasure in placing that
+fact upon record.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+MR. ALGERNON BILLIKINS.
+
+Mr. Algernon Billikins has recently passed the Toy Town matric with
+honours.  This interesting piece of news is calculated to astonish
+every one of our many readers, as the gentle man was hitherto thought
+to be insane.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+THE TOY TOWN POETESS.
+
+Mrs. Selina Starchup, who is a frequent contributor to our "Poet's
+Corner," and who seldom speaks except in rhyme, is publishing a small
+volume of verse early next year.
+
+Lovers of this gifted lady's verse have long wanted a collection of
+her miscellaneous work brought out in volume form, and the publishers
+inform us that a huge demand is anticipated.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+MR. WILLIAM DOGG, M.P.
+
+MISSING SINCE YESTERDAY.
+
+The senior member of the firm of Messrs. Dogg and Co. left home
+yesterday on a rat-worrying expedition and has not been seen or heard
+of since.
+
+If he does not return this will prove a sad blow to West Dogton which
+he represents in Parliament.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+WOOD LIMBO CONCERT.
+
+ACCIDENT TO FAT DOLL.
+
+[FROM OUR OWN CORRESPONDENT.]
+
+TOY TOWN.
+
+The annual concert in aid of that deserving charity, the Wood Limbo
+Hospital Fund, was held last night at Toy Town.
+
+It is well known that this splendid institution provides free arms
+and legs for Dolls in reduced circumstances, and is worthy of the
+warmest support.
+
+The concert was well attended, and a very high-class entertainment
+was given.  Amongst the performers were such popular artistes as Mr.
+Barker Pupp, Mr. Merry Codfish and Professor Sea Serpent.
+
+We regret having to announce an unfortunate accident which took place
+during Professor Sea Serpent's amusing tricks.  A Fat Doll who, with
+his wife Selina, occupied a private box, laughed so heartily that he
+broke his mainspring and was at once conveyed to the Wood Limbo
+Hospital, where he was detained.
+
+We learn on going to press that owing to his wiry constitution he is
+likely to recover.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+THE SCARECROW'S TRICK
+
+We hear that Mr. Scarecrow played an amusing trick on the Coroner and
+Jury last week.
+
+It is said that none of the Jury have been near his field since,
+which we can well believe.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+OLD "BOOTS" IN TROUBLE.
+
+FLOGGED AND DEPORTED.
+
+A respectably dressed gentleman, answering to the name of "Old Boots"
+appeared before the Magistrates yesterday at Dolls House City on a
+charge of "squeaking."
+
+It was stated in Court that the old chap was always offending in this
+respect, and that he had been convicted so many times that the police
+were tired of arresting him.
+
+However, they were obliged to take him into custody on this occasion
+because he persisted in creating the form of disturbance complained
+of in the grounds of the Teddio-Golliwog Exhibition.
+
+Prisoner "squeaked" so much when being brought into the dock that the
+Magistrates who had been provided with tea cosies, covered up their
+heads and sentenced prisoner, without even so much as glancing at
+him, to be flogged as an incorrigible rogue and deported.
+
+After prisoner had been removed to the cells, the Magistrates
+uncovered their ears and remarked that the severity of the punishment
+should go a long way towards ridding the country of such pests.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+ARREST OF POLLYWOG.
+
+A Pollywog was brought up at Dolls House City yesterday before Mr.
+Justice Max, charged with creating a breach of the peace, and
+threatening the Prime Minister with a green and violet flag.
+
+She was, needless to say, a militant leader in the Votes for
+Pollywogs movement, and was sentenced to six months' imprisonment.
+
+We learn, as we go to press, that the prisoner refused to eat the
+prison fare--marmalade and pickles--and was consequently released
+this morning.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+PUNCH AND JUDY SHOW.
+
+The Proprietors of the Toy Town Punch and Judy Show beg to inform
+their numerous and esteemed patrons that the infamous person known as
+Edward Bear, recently in their employ as Dog Toby, has now ceased to
+have any connection with them, and is not authorised to collect or
+receive monies on their behalf.
+
+With regard to the report that the performances at the show are to be
+discontinued, the Proprietors further state that it is absolutely
+untrue, and that they have been fortunate in securing the services of
+Mr. Biter Pupp (son of the well-known singer), whose realistic
+representation of the immortal Dog Toby, leaves nothing to be desired.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+THE GOLD BUTTON TRIAL
+
+PRISONER'S DISGUISE.
+
+Escape from Toy Cupboard.
+
+CAUGHT AT TOY TOWN.
+
+  [FROM OUR SPECIAL
+  CORRESPONDENT AT THE COURT.]
+
+Mr. Tommy Stapleton's Teddy Bear was brought before Mr. Justice Max
+at Dolls House City Police Court to-day, charged with cutting off the
+gold buttons from Mr. Jolly Jack's coat, while at Miss Gladys'
+birthday party.
+
+The story of the discovery of the theft was told by Mr. Tommy
+Stapleton; how the artful Bear had hidden the buttons under his coat
+and then tried to make believe they were nuts.
+
+He also told how Teddy was put into the toy cupboard, and of the
+further discovery of his escape later.
+
+At this point the Bear volunteered the information that, with the
+assistance of Mr. Billikins, he secreted himself in the Dolls'
+cradle, first turning out the Nigger Twins who were both fast asleep.
+Then when the cradle was removed next morning, by Jane, the
+housemaid, he made good his escape and fled to Toy Town, disguised as
+a Dog-Toby.
+
+A Golliwog Policeman: "Shall I arrest the Billikins, your Honour?"
+
+Mr. Justice Max: "Certainly not.  You know very well that he is
+insane."
+
+Miss Gladys next told how when at Toy Town with Miss Freda Morris,
+they discovered the Bear, who was quickly captured and taken to
+Toy-Town Gaol.
+
+In reply to a question from Mr. Justice Max, Mr. Tommy Stapleton said
+that his Bear played truant from school just when he thought proper,
+and sometimes he stayed out all night.
+
+"What a bad Teddy you are," said Mr. Justice Max gravely.  "I shall
+send you to Toy-Town Reformatory until you are a better Bear."
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+ONE HUNDRED YEARS OLD.
+
+AGED POLLYWOG INTERVIEWED.
+
+Mrs. Mary Ann James, of Dolls House City, celebrated her 100th
+birthday on Monday last.
+
+It is interesting to note that the old lady is the great-grand-parent
+of the Editor of this Journal.  She is in perfectly good health and
+can see to read "The Golliwog News" without glasses.
+
+The old lady believes her long life is due to the fact that she
+always goes to bed early, sucks an acid drop before going to sleep,
+and reads no other paper but "The Golliwog News."
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+GOLLIWOG CUP FINAL.
+
+POODLETON v. KITTEN TOWN.
+
+Great Win for the Poodles.
+
+The final match for the greatly prized Golliwog Cup took place on
+Saturday last, when it was apparently a case of all roads leading to
+the Dolls House City Football Ground, for nearly everybody went to
+see the game.
+
+The rival teams, Poodleton and Kitten Town, were very evenly matched,
+but after a hard fought game the Poodles carried off the trophy by
+one goal to nil.
+
+The strength of the two clubs, as shown by their positions in the
+Golliwog League, which we give below, is an indication what a
+splendid game took place.
+
+  THE GOLLIWOG LEAGUE.
+
+                         Pd. W. D. L. Pt.
+
+  Poodleton ...........  10  8  2  0  18
+  Kitten Town Tabbies    10  8  2  0  18
+  Frogland Jumpers ....   9  5  2  2  12
+  Fish Town ...........   9  3  5  1  11
+  Toy Town Toys .......  10  3  3  4   9
+  Teddy Bear Rovers ...   8  4  0  4   8
+  Dolls House City ....  10  3  0  7   6
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+COMEDIANS' BEREAVEMENT.
+
+We regret to announce that the only brother of Mr. Merry Codfish has
+been caught and sold as an article of diet.
+
+Mr. Merry Codfish has consequently gone into mourning, and will not
+appear in public for at least six months.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+OUR POETS' CORNER.
+
+ADELIZA'S DREAM.
+
+  She dreamt she bit the Teddy Bear.
+  And pinched the Nigger Twins.
+  She pulled Toy Monkey's wiry hair,
+  And slapped the Billikins.
+  Then all the woolly hairy crew
+  Miss Gladys loved so dearly.
+  She flung as far as Timbuctoo,--
+  Up to the moon--or nearly!
+
+  And then she dreamed Miss Gladys smiled,
+  And loved her all the day,
+  "My only darling precious child,
+  My Adeliza May!"
+  You're better far than Teddy Bears,
+  Or dusky Nigger Twins:
+  I hate the grinning face he wears
+  That horrid Billikins.
+
+  Alas!  The bell for nursery tea!
+  She woke and shook herself.
+  Saw Teddy and the proud Monkey,
+  The Billikins and Niggers wee,
+  Were on Miss Gladys' lap--and SHE
+  WAS ON THE NURSERY SHELF!
+
+SELINA STARCHUP.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+FIRST TILE CONCERT.
+
+Miss Spottikins asks us to announce that her first tile concert of
+the season will be held on Thursday next, and is open to all lovers
+of the refined and beautiful in tile music.  The performance will
+commence at 7.  Sparrows and mice at 8.30.  Carriages at 10.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+GOLLIWOGLAND MUSEUM.
+
+SOME RECENT ADDITIONS.
+
+The gold buttons stolen from Mr. Jolly Jack's coat have now been
+placed in the Royal Golliwogland Museum.
+
+Another interesting addition is a Pollywog's green and violet flag,
+with which, it is alleged, the Pollywog tried to strike the Prime
+Minister.
+
+But perhaps the most valuable possession of recent times, is a
+Comet's tail, which has been preserved in spirit at enormous cost.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+MISS MAY'S MARRIAGE.
+
+It has only just leaked out that Miss Adeliza May was married last
+week to Mr. Jolly Jack.  The event took place quietly, the ceremony
+being performed by Miss Gladys, assisted by Miss Freda Morris.
+
+Miss Spottikins made a very charming bridesmaid dressed up in Freda's
+hat and cloak, and Mr. Billikins acted as best man with his
+accustomed dignity and distinction.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+THE KEEPER OF THE M.B.
+
+The Keeper of the Money-Box left Dolls House City yesterday to spend
+the week-end in the country.
+
+It is rumoured that he packed the M.B. with his silk hat, and the
+valuable receptacle passed unnoticed.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+WHO KILLED COCK ROBIN
+
+Who killed Cock Robin?  Why the Sparrow of course.
+
+If you haven't seen the play in two acts now being performed at the
+Hall-in-the-Wood, Birdland City, you really ought.
+
+Gladys and Tommy and Freda were there last night and a very fine time
+they had.  The play is drawing crowded houses every night and is
+having a decided spell of popularity.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+MESSENGER BOY'S HEROISM.
+
+OF THE R.S.P.C.E.
+
+Master Henry Bruin, aged thirteen years, has been awarded a gold
+medal by the Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Elephants.
+
+This brave little fellow was returning home after delivering an
+important message from the Prime Minister to the Editor of "The
+Golliwog News," when he saw an aged and infirm Elephant endeavouring
+to get out of the way of a tram car.
+
+The heartless driver seemed to take pleasure in running down and
+startling invalid Toys, and the Elephant in question was obliged to
+abandon his crutches and hurry to a place of safety without them.
+
+Master Bruin, at great personal risk, darted into the road and
+secured the crutches, thereby preventing a suspicious looking
+Golliwog, with a coster's barrow, from appropriating them.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+MISSED THE EXCURSION.
+
+A little Teddy Bear in brown knickers, clasping a spade and bucket in
+ids hands, was discovered asleep in the waiting room at Toy Town
+station after the return excursion train had left.
+
+When awakened by a friendly porter, the poor little fellow cried
+bitterly, and asked to be taken to his daddy.
+
+Fortunately, he was identified by a brass trouser button, and sent to
+his distracted parents by the next train, which happened to be the
+last that night.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+TOY TOWN EXCURSION.
+
+MR. BARKER PUFF'S BIG HIT.
+
+The last excursion of the season to Toy-Town-on-Sea was well
+patronized last week.  Nearly everybody went, and a right merry time
+they had on the sands.  Gladys, Tommy and Freda were all there.
+
+Mr. Barker Pupp made a big hit with his song, "The Yellow Butterfly."
+In fact he hit Tommy Stapleton very hard.  It is freely stated that
+Tommy was in a blue funk, and that he was greatly relieved when he
+found that the crowd which followed him was only running to catch the
+train?
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+SIR SOLOMON'S HOLIDAY.
+
+Sir Solomon and Lady Seal have left Fish Town for a brief stay in the
+North.  Sir Solomon is badly in need of rest after his arduous public
+duties.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+CONFINED TO BARRACKS.
+
+We learn that Shelliback of the Lobster Fusiliers, has been confined
+to Barracks for neglecting to salute his superior officer, "Fighting
+Lobbs."
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+WITHOUT A TICKET.
+
+The Nigger Twins were fined at Dolls House City Police Court to-day
+for riding on the G. & T.B.R. without having paid their fare.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+PARTNERSHIP.
+
+Mr. Peter Bunney is entering into partnership with Mr. Plush Mole,
+the celebrated furrier, and the business is to be carried on under
+the name of Bunney and Mole.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+LOST LUGGAGE.
+
+Mr. Camel who was indiscreet enough to travel with luggage on
+Christmas Eve, lost a large consignment of dates, and has got the
+hump in consequence.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+FOR YOUNG FRY.
+
+Professor Walruzzio has compiled a pianoforte-tutor which should
+prove itself a golden guide to young fry with musical proclivities.
+The book is published by Messrs. Bleak & Brill, and the price is
+half-a-neptune, net.
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+
+
+
+
+Father Neptune's Treasure
+
+BY
+
+PHILIP & FAY INCHFAWN.
+
+A fascinating story of Gladys, Freda and Tommy, with their little
+friend, John James, under the sea.
+
+To begin with, the children are told by Father Neptune that his
+Castle is haunted!  And then commences the unravelling of the
+mystery,--which proves a very exciting business,--and the chase of
+the intruder in the castle vaults.
+
+The Sea King's sunken treasure ships are next the scene of action,
+and the story describes the children's journey on Dolphin-back, and
+the discovery and capture of a giant Saw-fish rifling the treasure
+chests.
+
+Following this, Father Neptune suddenly and mysteriously vanishes.
+The children and the under-sea folk are at their wits end, but John
+James lights upon a daring plot which seeks to remove the Sea Monarch
+from his throne.
+
+While following up the clues the children and the Golliwog also
+disappear, but thanks to a very queer friend, the Hermit Crab,
+tidings of their whereabouts are forthcoming.  Mrs. Lobbs also
+supplies a valuable clue.
+
+The chapters dealing with the discovery of the robbers' cave, where
+the children and the Sea King have been imprisoned, and the recovery
+of Father Neptune's stolen treasure are absorbingly interesting.
+
+The story is told with a quaint humour that is irresistibly
+entertaining.
+
+There are eight illustrations on art paper by
+
+F. C. WARD.
+
+Artistic Coloured Wrapper
+
+Cloth board 3/6 net.
+
+S. W. PARTRIDGE AND Co., LTD., Old Bailey, E.C.
+
+
+---------------------------------------------------------------------
+
+
+
+Father Neptune's Diamond
+
+BY
+
+PHILIP & FAY INCHFAWN.
+
+Another delightful story of the three children and John James, the
+Golliwog, describing their adventures searching for the blue
+diamond--lost from Father Neptune's crown.
+
+All our old friends, Mr. Merry Codfish, Professor Sea Serpent,
+Fighting Lobbs, Sir Solomon and Lady Seal and many other equally
+"queer fish" appear again.
+
+Various clues are followed in their efforts to trace the diamond,
+some are amusing, and some are thrilling, but, perhaps the most
+exciting part of the story deals with the capture of John James by
+the Flying Fish.
+
+The Golliwog is locked in the cabin of a sunken galleon, and through
+the port-hole, the history of a deeply laid plot--which includes the
+destruction of Fish Town--is revealed to him by the Fiddler Crab.
+These Flyers of the deep, apparently, have Fish Town at their mercy,
+but their plot is frustrated and brought to failure by Tommy's plans.
+
+The defeat of Commander Saw, the story of the volcano under the sea,
+the ultimate return of John James, and the final recovery of the
+diamond make a fascinating tale.
+
+----------------
+
+There are twenty illustrations by THOMAS MAYBANK, in which he
+pictures various amusing and thrilling incidents throughout the book.
+
+Artistic Coloured Wrapper
+
+Cloth board 3/6 net.
+
+S. W. PARTRIDGE AND Co. LTD., Old Bailey, E.C.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 79377 ***
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+The Project Gutenberg eBook of The Golliwog News, by Philip and Fay Inchfawn
+</title>
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+
+<body>
+<div style='text-align:center'>*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 79377 ***</div>
+
+
+<p><br><br></p>
+
+<p class="capcenter">
+<a id="img-front"></a>
+<br>
+<img class="imgcenter" src="images/img-front.jpg" alt="&quot;SHE SAW JOHN JAMES SITTING ASTRIDE THE WINDOW SILL.&quot; <i>p.</i> 21.">
+<br>
+&quot;SHE SAW JOHN JAMES SITTING ASTRIDE THE WINDOW SILL.&quot; <a href="#p21"><i>p.</i> 21</a>.
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br></p>
+
+<p class="t3b">
+  THE<br>
+</p>
+
+<h1>
+  GOLLIWOG NEWS.<br>
+</h1>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  A STORY OF THREE CHILDREN<br>
+  AND A TOY NEWSPAPER.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p class="t4">
+  WITH SUPPLEMENT.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  BY<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t2">
+  PHILIP AND FAY INCHFAWN.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  ILLUSTRATIONS BY T. C. SMITH.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  London:<br>
+  S. W. PARTRIDGE & CO., LTD.<br>
+  OLD BAILEY.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br><br></p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  FIRST EDITION, 1913.<br>
+  SECOND EDITION, 1914.<br>
+  THIRD EDITION, 1917.<br>
+  FOURTH EDITION, 1919.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br><br></p>
+
+<p class="t3b">
+  CONTENTS<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p class="noindent smcap">
+  I. <a href="#chap01">What Gladys Found</a><br>
+  II. <a href="#chap02">After the Party</a><br>
+  III. <a href="#chap03">The Seaside Excursion</a><br>
+  IV. <a href="#chap04">At the Football Match</a><br>
+  V. <a href="#chap05">The Dolls Parliament</a><br>
+  VI. <a href="#chap06">The Scarecrow</a><br>
+  VII. <a href="#chap07">Birdland City</a><br>
+  VIII. <a href="#chap08">Who Killed Cock Robin</a><br>
+  IX. <a href="#chap09">Visit to Fish Town</a><br>
+  X. <a href="#chap10">The Banquet</a><br>
+  XI. <a href="#chap11">At The Exhibition</a><br>
+  XII. <a href="#chap12">The Christmas Party</a><br>
+  <a href="#chap13">Newspaper Supplement</a><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br><br></p>
+
+<p class="t3b">
+LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS.
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+<a href="#img-front">"She saw John James sitting astride the
+window sill."</a> ... Frontispiece.
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+<a href="#img-035">"He picked a dandelion and began to blow at
+it counting the while."</a>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+<a href="#img-069">"Wasn't that a fine goal."</a>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+<a href="#img-087">"The bagpipes were played by a flamingo
+dressed in a kilt and wearing a tam-o-shanter."</a>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+"Six owls arranged themselves in a semi-circle
+and sang in chorus." [Missing from source book]
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+<a href="#img-171">"'How do!' he said pleasantly, 'fine
+doings here, to-day.'"</a>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+<a href="#img-189">"The last item on the programme was a humorous
+song by Mr. Merry Codfish."</a>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+<a href="#img-239">"There never was such a Christmas Party
+before nor since."</a>
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br><br></p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  <i>BOOKS BY THE SAME AUTHORS.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  FATHER NEPTUNE'S TREASURE.<br>
+  FATHER NEPTUNE'S DIAMOND.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  LONDON:<br>
+  S. W. PARTRIDGE AND CO., LTD.<br>
+  OLD BAILEY.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br><br></p>
+
+<p><a id="chap01"></a></p>
+
+<h2>
+CHAPTER I.
+</h2>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  "I want my Golly," Miss Gladys said,<br>
+  As she softly slipped from her downy bed,<br>
+  Pattering over the nursery floor,<br>
+  Feeling about by the nursery door.<br>
+  But you never would guess, if you guessed all night,<br>
+  What Gladys found in the pale moonlight.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br></p>
+
+<p class="t2">
+THE GOLLIWOG NEWS.
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br></p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+CHAPTER I.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+WHAT GLADYS FOUND.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys was ten, and John James
+belonged to her.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James was the big Golliwog, and
+the little girl always took him to bed with
+her.  But, somehow, he used to get out of
+bed in the night and would be found lying
+on the nursery floor in the morning.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys had a big lady-doll named Adeliza
+May, and a very grand gentleman-doll who
+wore a white wig like that of a judge.  She
+called him Mortimer Max, because he looked
+so solemn, and Gladys, as you may guess,
+was very proud of him.  She nursed him
+a good deal, and sometimes slapped him
+very hard, but he was so strong he never
+seemed to mind anything, not even when
+Carlo worried him.  Carlo was a nice little
+fox terrier, who also belonged to Gladys,
+and she had a pretty tortoiseshell kitten,
+named Spottikins, as well.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But the toy she loved best of all was her
+big Golliwog.  He was scarcely a handsome
+Golly.  Golliwogs aren't handsome, as
+a rule, now are they?  But John James
+was a particularly fine fellow.  He had
+bright shining eyes like polished shoe buttons,
+a quantity of black bristling hair, and a very
+broad smile.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys called him John after the
+gardener, and James after the boy who
+cleaned the boots and knives.  She was
+fond of them both, you see, and did not
+want either of them to feel jealous.
+Gladys also had a Toy Monkey, a very
+funny grinning Billikins, and two little Nigger
+Boys, who were so much alike that the little
+girl said they must be twins.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The house where Gladys lived was in
+the country, with lanes and fields all around.
+There were only two other houses near
+and Freda Morris lived in one, and Tommy
+Stapleton in the other.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Freda had a beautiful sailor-doll named
+Jolly Jack.  She always brought him with
+her when she came to see Gladys, and very
+proud she was of his bright yellow buttons
+and his midshipman's hat.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy Stapleton did not care for dolls.
+What boy does?  But he had a large Teddy
+Bear for a pet, which he dragged along on
+a silver chain.  Teddy had a very cunning,
+crafty face, and Gladys and Freda both
+disliked him.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Now at the time when this story begins,
+it was the end of the summer and Gladys
+had just had her birthday party.  It was a
+very delightful affair.  Tommy came and
+brought his Teddy, and Freda brought Jolly
+Jack.  Some little cousins of Gladys' came
+in a cab and brought their dolls and two
+baby Teddies with them.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Adeliza May and John James were
+dressed in their best and sat up to the table
+just like real people.  All the visitors
+admired Spottikins, Carlo rushed to and fro
+and barked, and between whiles he sat and
+begged for pieces of the pink iced cake with
+"Gladys" written across the top.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys went to bed that night at a
+quarter to ten o'clock.  It was much beyond
+her usual time, and she was very tired.
+She had had an exciting day, and one or
+two curious things had happened.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The toy motor, which Tommy Stapleton
+had given her for a birthday present, nearly
+ran over the two little Teddies&mdash;they were
+twins and were her small cousins' especial
+pets.  Happily they were not hurt.  But
+this was not all.  Somebody at the party&mdash;no
+one knew who&mdash;had cut off Jolly Jack's
+gold buttons.  Every single one!
+Freda cried when she discovered what
+had happened; Jolly Jack looked very
+crestfallen, and John James' bright eyes
+and his sharp funny little nose, seemed more
+intelligent than ever.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+All these things came back to Gladys
+as she undressed herself, and she remembered
+very clearly that Tommy Stapleton's wicked
+Teddy had looked as if he were laughing.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Horrid creature!" said Gladys to
+herself.  Then she got into bed and went
+to sleep.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In the middle of the night she woke,
+and felt under the bedclothes for John James.
+He was not there, and then Gladys suddenly
+remembered that she had left him on the
+sofa in the day nursery.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Very quietly she slipped out of bed, and
+tiptoed across the landing in her white
+night-dress.  She shivered a little for the windows
+were wide open.  It was a clear night, and
+outside in the lane the telegraph wires were
+making a curious zuz-z-z-z-z-ing sound.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys crept towards the sofa.  Where
+was John James?  She was quite sure she
+had left him propped up against the hard
+horse-hair cushion, and now she could not
+find him.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+She got down upon her hands and knees
+and felt in the crack between the sofa and
+the toy cupboard.  John James might have
+fallen, but no, he was not there.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys could not find anything but a
+scrap of torn paper.  She straightened it
+out to look at it, and the word "Golliwog"
+caught her eye.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"This might be something about John
+James," said the little girl, smiling to herself,
+and down she went again on her knees to
+see whether she could find anything more.
+Yes, there was something inside the crack,
+which seemed like a piece of folded paper.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys pulled it out&mdash;it was a tiny, tiny
+newspaper, and there was the title:
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+THE GOLLIWOG NEWS.
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+The moon shone out from behind a
+cloud and Gladys could see quite plainly.
+The paper was printed and folded exactly
+like the one her father had every day, only
+Gladys saw that this newspaper circulated
+in Toy-Town-on-Sea, Dolls House City, and
+ever so many other funny places.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+She began to read the head lines,
+forgetting that her little pink feet were bare
+and that the wind was blowing her curls
+hither and thither over her shoulders.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys read aloud:
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  "BIRTHDAY PARTY ACCIDENT."<br>
+  "NARROW ESCAPE OF TEDDY TWINS."<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+At that the little girl nearly screamed
+for it was all about her toy motor and her
+party, and the little twin Teddies that
+belonged to her cousins.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+<a id="p21"></a>
+"Well, I never!" exclaimed Gladys very
+loudly; then, looking up, she saw John
+James sitting astride the window sill.  He
+had his coat off and was writing as fast as
+ever he could.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"How did you get there?" cried Gladys,
+rushing to the window and picking him up
+by one leg.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Golliwog scowled at her, wrenched
+himself free, and ran back to the window sill.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys gazed at her refractory pet.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Wait half a minute," he said, "I'm busy."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+So Gladys waited.  John James scribbled
+and muttered for five minutes longer.  Then
+he jumped down and sat on the sofa beside
+his mistress.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+While she had been waiting for him
+Gladys had read the little newspaper.  It
+was all about Dolls, Teddy Bears, Golliwogs
+and Pollywogs&mdash;Pollywogs, as you will
+easily guess, are lady Gollies.  In fact, there
+seemed to be something in the newspaper
+about all the Toys and Pets, Gladys had ever
+heard of.  It was really a most amazing
+discovery.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The advertisements were the funniest
+Gladys had ever read, and the idea of cats
+and dogs forming themselves into a Golliwog
+League and playing football sent her into
+fits of laughter.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I'm the Editor," said John James proudly.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh!" said Gladys, and her round eyes
+opened wider with surprise.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Is Carlo in it?" she began, but John
+James was not listening, he had rushed to
+the window again.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Sh! sh!" he said.  "It's going on again."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"What's going on?" asked Gladys as
+she crept nearer.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Zuz-z-z-z-y!" went the telegraph
+wires, and John James scribbled away madly.
+At last he stopped, and asked Gladys to lend
+him a handkerchief.  She found a very dirty
+one hidden under the sofa cushion, and
+watched him mop his face with it.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"That was a very near thing!"
+exclaimed the Golliwog.  "I might have been
+in bed and asleep.  Oh, my!  It's a great
+piece of news.  Don't you think so?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"You haven't told me yet what it is,"
+said Glady crossly, for she was dying to ask
+all kinds of questions about the newspaper.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh, haven't I?"  John James wiped
+his hairy forehead again.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Well, he's been caught&mdash;the Teddy
+who stole the gold buttons off Master Jack
+Midshipman's coat.  Surely you must have
+heard about that?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"You don't mean Jolly Jack's buttons,
+do you?  Of course, I knew he lost them
+off his coat last night.  Freda cried about
+it.  Did you say it was a Teddy who stole
+them?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I did," answered John James.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Then I know who it was!" cried Gladys
+dancing to and fro in the moonlight.  "It
+was that horrid Teddy of Tommy Stapleton's.
+Shall you put it in the paper?  And will
+poor Freda get the buttons back?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"One question at a time," replied the
+Golliwog grandly.  "An account of the trial
+will appear in the <i>News</i>, and the buttons&mdash;the
+solid gold buttons&mdash;will be placed in
+the Royal Golliwogland Museum."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Then Freda won't get them&mdash;&mdash;"
+began Gladys.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"But she can go and see them some
+day," cried John James eagerly; "just think
+of that!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys was thoroughly interested.  But
+something suddenly creaked in the night
+nursery, and seizing John James in her arms,
+the little girl hurried back to bed.
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br><br></p>
+
+<p><a id="chap02"></a></p>
+
+<h2>
+CHAPTER II.
+</h2>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  Buttons!  Bright with golden lustre,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Found at last, though snugly hid;<br>
+  Wasn't Teddy in a fluster?<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Read, and see what Tommy did.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br></p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+CHAPTER II.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+AFTER THE PARTY.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It's all true," said Gladys in an offended
+voice.  "But, of course, you needn't believe
+it if you don't want to.  Carlo, I wish you
+wouldn't bark."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The two little girls were having tea
+together, and Gladys had been telling Freda
+about <i>The Golliwog News</i>.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Freda slapped her sailor doll, Jolly Jack.
+He was eating much too fast, she explained.
+Then she put her arm round Gladys.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Of course I believe it," she said.  "I
+wish I had been there.  Do you think I could
+come next time?  I should like to see the
+Gollies' newspaper, and do you think&mdash;do
+you really think I could go to Golliwogland
+and see Jack's gold buttons in the Museum?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I don't know," said Gladys.  "John
+James hasn't spoken to me since, and Adeliza
+May has been so troublesome you'd never
+believe.  She tore the dress I made her for
+the party and I'm worried to death."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"How very vexing!" said Freda, looking
+severely at Adeliza May.  "But I had a
+trying time myself this morning.  Someone
+had eaten all the jam out of my nursery
+stores.  You know the box of things I had
+last Christmas with the scales and sweets
+and little pots of jam?  Well, I had one
+pot left&mdash;black currant it was&mdash;and every bit
+has disappeared.  It's most annoying."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It is," agreed Gladys, nibbling daintily
+at her cake, while her Golliwog stared steadily
+from the window seat, and Carlo sat up to
+beg.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Then there were Jack's buttons,"
+Freda went on sadly.  "I've had to put
+trouser buttons on his coat.  It's a great
+shame.  He'll never look such a handsome
+sailor again.  I wish I could get that Teddy.
+I'd set Carlo at him."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Carlo, hearing his name mentioned,
+jumped up and barked.  He capered round
+and round the room, chased a piece of cake
+into the window seat, and knocked John
+James down.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys and Freda flew to the rescue.
+There was a general stampede, and when
+they were all settled in their places again
+there was a loud knock at the front door.
+The two little girls jumped up.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Let's run out and look over the
+bannisters," said Gladys, and off they trotted.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It's Mrs. Stapleton," whispered Freda.
+"I saw the feather in her bonnet.  Oh! and
+Tommy is with her, and he has brought
+that hateful Teddy."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Freda turned quite white.  She and
+Gladys rushed back to the nursery and shut
+the door.  But the very next minute, Jane,
+the housemaid, came up to say that Master
+Tommy Stapleton had come with his mamma,
+and would take tea with Miss Gladys and
+Miss Freda.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A moment later Tommy marched in.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Hullo! here we are again," he shouted,
+putting his big Teddy down beside Jolly Jack.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"What have you for tea?  Any cake
+left over from the party?  I liked that
+creamy stuff with the pink sugar on it."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"You are a greedy boy," said Gladys
+severely; "and you had better leave your
+Teddy outside."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Whatever for?" cried Tommy, seizing
+his pet and holding him upside down by one
+leg.  "He's better than your old Golliwog
+any day."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"He isn't!" cried Gladys.  "John James
+can talk, can't he Freda?  And your Teddy
+is nothing but a thief."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"That's a bit too tall," said Tommy,
+getting very red; "but Teddy and I won't
+stop here with two silly little girls.  Come
+along, Teddy Boy," and Tommy walked
+towards the nursery door.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"But I wanted a bun," screamed the
+Bear, and he darted across the room, seized
+a bun from the table and ate it greedily.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In a moment the Golliwog had jumped
+off the window seat, and Jolly Jack leaped
+from his chair.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Thump him!" cried Adeliza May.  "It
+was he who tore my dress at the party, and
+Miss Gladys thought I did it myself.  Hit him,
+Mr. Jack!  Don't spare him, Mr. Golliwog."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Not much!" cried Jolly Jack.  "We'll
+let him have it."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+And between them they pummelled
+Teddy's woolly body till he howled for mercy.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy had come back to the table, and
+the little girls were much too startled to
+speak.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys was the first to find her tongue,
+and while the three Toys were having their
+desperate fight she managed to tell Tommy
+all about his Teddy and the gold buttons.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy was horrified.  He stuck his
+hands in his pockets and stood, with his legs
+wide apart, considering the situation.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"The young bounder!" he cried.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"But how did he manage to get away?"
+queried Gladys.  "John James told me last
+night that he had been captured and put in
+prison."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Out on bail, I expect," remarked
+Tommy, and he explained, rather grandly,
+that this was sometimes allowed.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Carlo's bitten a piece out of his ear!"
+cried Freda.  "Don't you think he's had
+enough?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I say, just stop that fighting!"
+commanded Tommy sharply.  "Now, Teddy,
+my boy, what have you got to say for yourself?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Jolly Jack and the Golliwog fell back,
+panting for breath.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The trouser buttons on Jack's dark
+navy suit were sewn on with white cotton
+and made him look slovenly and untidy.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James' eyes were fierce with anger,
+and his hair positively bristled as he sat down
+in the window seat once more and allowed
+Teddy's master to deal with him.
+</p>
+
+<p class="capcenter">
+<a id="img-035"></a>
+<br>
+<img class="imgcenter" src="images/img-035.jpg" alt="&quot;HE PICKED A DANDELION AND BEGAN TO BLOW AT IT, COUNTING THE WHILE.&quot;">
+<br>
+&quot;HE PICKED A DANDELION AND BEGAN TO BLOW AT IT, <br>
+COUNTING THE WHILE.&quot;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy sat on the arm of the sofa,
+with his legs crossed in what he thought was
+a very grown-up attitude.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Now, Teddy," he said, "what is the
+meaning of this?  Is it really true that you
+<i>did</i> cut those buttons off Jolly Jack's coat?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Teddy got down on his knees, and began
+hitting his head against the sofa.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"If you please&mdash;<i>bang</i>&mdash;I'm very sorry&mdash;<i>bang</i>&mdash;and
+I'll never do it again"&mdash;<i>bang&mdash;bang&mdash;bang</i>.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Hand out those buttons," demanded
+Tommy, "and leave off hitting your stupid
+head in that idiotic way."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I haven't got them," said Teddy
+getting up, and beginning to dance on one
+toe.  "I don't know where they are."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Why did you take them?" asked
+Gladys, giving him a little shake.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I was going to buy a present for Adeliza
+May," whimpered the Bear.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"How dare you!" screamed Jolly Jack.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Don't tell stories," began Gladys, and
+she shook him again.  "I believe I felt
+something inside his coat," she said suddenly.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Come here," said Tommy to the Bear
+in a very loud and awful voice.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Teddy obeyed without a word, and
+Tommy felt all over his loose brown coat
+and found a hard round substance behind
+his ear.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"What's this?" he said, holding it
+fast with a piece of Teddy's fur.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It's a nut," remarked the wicked Bear.
+"I&mdash;er&mdash;swallowed it by accident yesterday,
+and it went behind my ear, and it's been
+there ever since."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"What's this, then?" yelled John James
+seizing Teddy's leg.  "Here's another nut."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"And another!" cried Jolly Jack who
+had taken hold of the Bear's elbow.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Then Teddy saw that the game was up.
+He opened a small hole in the lining of his
+coat, shook himself, and six yellow buttons
+tumbled on to the carpet.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy picked them up and handed
+them to John James.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I understand you take charge of these,"
+he said.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Golliwog placed them in an inner
+pocket for safety and made a note in his
+pocket-book.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"But what shall we do with Teddy?"
+asked Freda.  "He ought to be punished."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"He spoke of buying Adeliza May a
+present," said Jolly Jack getting very red
+in the face.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"He told stories and ate the biggest
+bath bun," said Gladys.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Shall I bite him?" asked Carlo eagerly.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Pop him into the toy cupboard,"
+suggested Tommy holding open the door.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I'll do it," said John James, and he
+and Jolly Jack between them thrust him in
+with no very gentle hands, and Tommy
+turned the key in the lock.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"You did that pretty well, you two,"
+began Tommy.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But neither John James nor Jolly Jack
+made any reply.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Golliwog was sitting in the window
+with his usual stony stare, while the sailor
+doll was lying against the table leg.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The children glanced towards the nursery
+door and saw that Gladys' mother and
+Mrs. Stapleton stood there.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Time to go home, Tommy," said his
+mother.  "Come along, my son."
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br><br></p>
+
+<p><a id="chap03"></a></p>
+
+<h2>
+CHAPTER III.
+</h2>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  How everyone journeyed to Toy-Town-on-Sea.<br>
+  And had jam-tarts for dinner and pancakes for tea.<br>
+  How everyone paddled and walked by the shore.<br>
+  And how wicked Teddy was captured once more.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br></p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+CHAPTER III.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+THE SEASIDE EXCURSION.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys was tired of staying in the house.
+She had carried John James and Adeliza May
+downstairs, and was sitting with them in
+the garden.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Carlo was worrying an old straw hat
+which he had discovered in a corner of the
+shrubbery, and Spottikins sat upon Gladys'
+shoulder and purred.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Presently Gladys yawned, and drew
+<i>The Golliwog News</i> out of her pocket.
+Things were rather dull, for she had had a
+bad cold, and her Golly had not spoken to
+her for a week.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Besides this, another annoying thing had
+happened.  Tommy Stapleton's Teddy Bear
+had escaped from the toy cupboard and
+had not been seen since.  No one knew where
+he was, and Gladys was thinking about him
+as she unfolded the neat little newspaper
+and began to read.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  EXCURSION TO TOY-TOWN-ON-SEA.<br>
+  GOLLIWOG AND TEDDY BEAR RAILWAY.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+"It sounds jolly," said Gladys; then
+turning to John James she added:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Are you going by the excursion?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Of course I am," said John James,
+polishing up his scarlet nose and rubbing
+his hairy legs.  "I'm going in ten minutes."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"What?" cried Gladys, looking at the
+newspaper.  "Why, of course, it's to-day!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Good gracious me!  Where's Adeliza
+May?" she continued, as she noticed for
+the first time that Adeliza had disappeared.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Gone in to tidy her hair and put on
+her best hat, I expect.  It's the last excursion
+this season," said the Golliwog, hurrying
+down the path to the gate.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys followed him, and she was surprised
+to see a crowd of Teddy Bears, Dolls,
+Golliwogs, Pollywogs, and even Cats and
+Dogs which she knew quite well by sight,
+hurrying down the road towards the railway
+station.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"How happy they look!" cried Gladys;
+"and how they are talking!  Oh, see that
+little Bear in the brown knickers carrying
+a spade and bucket.  Oh, John James, I do
+want to go too.  Can't I come?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Why, yes, I should think so," said
+the Golliwog loftily, "but I can't wait for
+you, you must come on by yourself.  I have
+to be at the station early."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"All right," said Gladys.  She snatched
+up her white sun-bonnet and ran off to call
+for Freda.  Of course Freda must go with
+her.  As she opened the garden gate she
+saw Carlo join the hurrying scampering
+crew, and Spottikins raced after him at a
+great rate and linked her paw with that of
+a tabby acquaintance.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Adeliza May came sailing down the steps
+with an air of great importance, but Gladys
+could not stop to speak to her.  At the gate
+she stumbled against Jolly Jack, who asked
+rather sheepishly if Adeliza was ready.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys hurried on.  Freda was watering
+her garden, but when she heard the news
+she rushed off down the road with Gladys,
+still carrying the water-can in her hand.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Can't we let Tommy Stapleton come
+with us?" asked Freda breathlessly.  "Why,
+there he is trying to catch that yellow
+butterfly.  Quick, Gladys.  Tell him!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I'll come," said Tommy with alacrity.
+"Lessons!  Oh, bother!  I shan't go to
+school to-day.  I wish I were that yellow
+butterfly over there, and that the
+school-master, old Stubbins, could see me flying
+past his window.  Hurrah!  Yes, I'll come
+with you.  Watch me race that insane
+old Rabbit!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Off went Tommy after the Rabbit, who,
+by the way, was a very respectable fellow
+indeed.  He wore a black and white check
+suit, and brown leggings.  Anyone with half
+an eye could see that he was one of those
+worthy people who had gone back to the
+land.  His name was Peter Bunney.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy overtook him, and gave him
+a polite dig in the ribs.  The Rabbit looked
+immensely pleased, and got out an ear-trumpet.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Should you mind saying it again, sir?"
+said he.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I didn't say anything," remarked
+Tommy to himself; then he shouted into
+the trumpet:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It's a very fine morning, Mr. Bunney,
+and I hope we shall be in time for the train."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh, no, I don't think so at all," said
+the Rabbit cheerfully, stopping in the middle
+of the road, and looking up at the sky.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"There'll be no rain to-day, sir."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"That isn't what I said," cried Tommy,
+seizing his arm and dragging him along,
+"I said I hoped we should catch the train."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Then you should try mustard and
+water," began Peter, "and if the pain continues&mdash;&mdash;"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But Tommy had had enough of it.
+While he and the Rabbit had been talking
+together Gladys and Freda had got some
+distance ahead, but now Tommy quickly
+overtook them, and a few minutes later
+they reached the station and got into the
+train.  John James was walking up and
+down the corridor making a list of all the
+important people.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys, Freda, and Tommy, naturally,
+occupied the same compartment, and they
+all three smiled when a large Persian Cat
+wearing an eyeglass got in with them, leaving
+just room for John James in the tiny carriage.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"No one else shall get in," said Gladys,
+"Stand in front of the door, Tommy, and
+make faces out of the window."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Of course, Tommy did so.  He put on the
+expression of a lunatic enduring great physical
+agony, and it was quite funny to see the
+Teddies and Gollies and the rest wandering
+up and down the platform, trying to find
+seats, but afraid to get in where Tommy was.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+At last everyone found a seat, the smart
+looking porters slammed the doors, and the
+guard came out with his whistle and his
+green flag.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Cheerup&mdash;cheerup&mdash;cheerew!" went
+the whistle.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Puff!  Puff!" went the engine, and then
+at the very last minute a black and white
+check sleeve was thrust in at the window,
+the door handle turned, and into Gladys'
+carriage, head over heels, tumbled Mr. Peter
+Bunney!
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I nearly lost the train," he remarked
+pleasantly, sitting down beside Freda and
+getting out his ear trumpet.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Now there won't be room for my
+Golly," cried Gladys.  "What a shame!
+He would have told us all about everything.
+He's such a splendid news-getter."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Rabbit turned towards her with
+a beaming face.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"You are quite right," he said sweetly.
+"My hearing is much better, that's why
+I'm going to Toy-Town.  I want to hear
+the band, and all that's going on.  Why,
+yes!  There's my old friend, Plush Mole.
+Hullo, there!  Mole&mdash;Mole!  How do, Mole?
+Let me out&mdash;yes, thank you&mdash;good day&mdash;very
+pleased to have met you&mdash;see you at Toy-Town.
+Hi! there, Mole!" and off darted
+Mr. Peter Bunney up the corridor after his
+friend, Mr. Plush Mole.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+At last John James got in and sat down
+by the Persian Cat with the eye-glass.  Then
+for a time, at any rate, Mr. Peter Bunney
+was forgotten, although they could occasionally
+hear him shouting and Mr. Mole's carefully
+repeated sentences in reply.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Be quick!" said Gladys; "tell us all the
+news.  Where's Adeliza May?  And who on
+earth is Mr. Plush Mole?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James smiled and winked at the
+Persian Cat.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Miss May," he said, "is travelling
+with Jolly Jack.  They have a carriage to
+themselves, though how they managed it
+is more than tongue can tell."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Persian took out his eye-glass,
+cleaned it with the window curtain and
+stuck it in his eye again.  His name was
+Mr. Purr Catt, and John James said he was
+Member of Parliament for Kitten Town.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Do you know Mr. Plush Mole, sir,"
+asked the Golliwog politely.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Ah, well&mdash;slightly," drawled the
+Persian.  "He's a very stay-at-home fellow&mdash;can't
+think what induced him to come to-day.
+An authority on beetles, I believe, but
+proud, so I am told.  Short-sighted too&mdash;very."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Persian gave a great deal of interesting
+information, and the Golliwog was
+still scribbling in his note book when the
+train drew up at Toy-Town.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Hooray!  Hooray!" screamed all the
+little Teddies, scrambling out on to the
+platform.  "Hip-hip-hooray!" cried the
+baby Gollies.  The Cats mewed, and Dogs
+barked, and altogether it was a very merry
+party indeed that found its way to the shore.
+After looking round the place for an
+hour or so, they all lunched at the Grand
+Hotel, and then went to find amusement.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James was here, there, and everywhere,
+and Tommy Stapleton followed him,
+but Gladys and Freda walked about together.
+And when they got tired of that they filled
+Freda's water-can at one of the pools, and
+amused themselves by sprinkling little Teddies
+and Gollies with it, which so delighted a
+Papa Golly that he wanted to buy the can
+for two cough lozenges and a peppermint
+drop.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It will be so useful," he explained,
+"when my children are troublesome."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But Freda would not sell the can because
+the peppermint looked dirty, just as if it
+had been carried in his pocket for weeks
+and sucked occasionally.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+When they had managed to get rid of
+the Papa Golliwog, they caught sight of
+Spottikins walking with Mr. Purr Catt, who
+wore the eyeglass, and they saw Carlo join
+himself to a band of mischievous Dogs who
+prowled up and down the sands and told
+everybody they were going to give a concert
+presently.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The two little girls were enjoying their
+day at the seaside immensely; in the distance
+they could see a Punch-and-Judy show, so
+they hurried to have a look at it.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There was Punch with the hump on
+his back, and Mrs. Judy with her squeaky
+voice, and standing among the listening
+crowd was Mr. Plush Mole, looking very
+puzzled and solemn as if he were not sure
+what it was all about, and beside him stood
+Mr. Peter Bunney holding up his ear-trumpet.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"That's a very funny Toby," whispered
+Gladys.  "I never saw a dog Toby like that
+before.  Why, Freda, it's <i>Teddy</i>!  Tommy
+Stapleton's Teddy!  However did he get
+there?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"So it is," said Freda.  "We ought to
+tell John James."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"There he is coming," said Gladys,
+and off she ran, bursting with eagerness to
+tell how she had discovered the Teddy who
+was "wanted" by all the policemen in
+Golliwogland.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James was as much excited as
+Gladys.  Freda lent him her water-can, and
+Tommy found a constable, and the three
+of them pushed their way through the crowd.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Just as the wicked, much be-frilled Toby
+was biting Mr. Punch's scarlet nose, he felt
+a sudden stream of water splashing down
+his face, and a heavy hand on his shoulder,
+while a stern voice said:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Edward Bear, I arrest you."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In vain he struggled and tried to jump
+down "behind the scenes."  Tommy and
+John James assured him that anything he
+said would be taken down in writing and
+used against him as evidence, and after a
+good deal of scrimmaging five Golliwog
+policemen marched the wicked Teddy away.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"He's a very bad lot," said Tommy
+rejoining Gladys and Freda, "He actually
+said he was a relation of mine; nephew,
+I think it was.  I'm glad they've caught
+him.  Whew!  I am hot!  Isn't it nearly
+tea-time?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"The time?  I'll see.  No trouble at
+all," said Mr. Bunney who came hurrying
+up at the moment.  He picked a dandelion
+and began to blow at it, counting the while.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"One&mdash;-two&mdash;three&mdash;four&mdash;five&mdash;six&mdash;"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh, I say," said Tommy, "it can't
+be six o'clock yet."  But the Rabbit went on.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Seven&mdash;-eight&mdash;nine&mdash;ten&mdash;eleven&mdash;"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Here, come on," cried Tommy, "that
+old buffer's quite mad; he's blowing the air,
+not the dandelion."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He hurried the little girls to the Grand
+Hotel, ordered tea for three, with ice-cream
+and pancakes, and the trio made an excellent
+meal.  When they had finished and were
+strolling along the Promenade towards the
+station, they met the Rabbit again.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It's a hundred and twenty-one o'clock."
+he cried.  "I thought it was getting late.
+Time for Plush-Mole to be in-doors.  He gets
+asthma if he stays out.  I must find him,"
+and off scampered Peter with the dandelion
+in his hand, and his trumpet sticking out
+of his pocket.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Who in the world is this coming now?"
+said Tommy.  "This is a queer place."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Why, it's our Carlo, isn't it?" said
+Gladys.  "What has he got round his neck?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Carlo trotted up, and they saw that
+round his neck he had a piece of cardboard
+tied with a bit of scarlet ribbon.  These
+words were printed on it:
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  GRAND CONCERT ON THE SANDS AT<br>
+  SEVEN-THIRTY.<br>
+  MR. BARKER PUPP WILL SING.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+"Shall we go?" said Tommy.  "Our
+train starts back at a quarter past nine.  Let's
+go and see what they mean to do."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+On the sands the Dogs had erected a
+kind of platform.  In one corner sat the
+orchestra&mdash;a number of Fox Terriers who
+played on combs&mdash;and really they made
+quite a good deal of noise.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Carlo was at the piano, and every now
+and then he shouted instructions to the
+orchestra.  It was very funny to see him
+playing with all four of his feet; but then,
+as he said, he was able in this way to use
+the whole of the piano at once.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It would take far too long to tell you all
+that these funny Doggies did to amuse the
+tremendous and ever increasing crowd of
+Toys, who came from all parts of the town
+to hear them.  But the song which was most
+appreciated was the one sung by Mr. Barker
+Pupp, who had dressed himself like a schoolboy,
+in a Norfolk suit with a satchel over his
+shoulder.  This was the first verse:
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Oh, wouldn't it be splendid<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;If my school days all were ended<br>
+  And I could change with yonder butterfly.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I'd live on sweets and honey,<br>
+  And wouldn't it be funny<br>
+  If old Stubbins saw me gaily flutter by?</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy grew very red.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I don't care very much for that," he
+whispered.  "It's silly."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Be quiet," said Gladys; "there's going
+to be another verse."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The orchestra flourished their combs,
+played a few bars with their heads on one
+side, and then Mr. Barker Pupp, looking
+straight at Tommy, sang the next verse:
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>But the Butterfly so yellow,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Said, "O my, you silly fellow,"<br>
+  And he laughed so loud he very nearly burst.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+Here the audience tittered, and pointed
+at Tommy.  The small Gollies and Teddies
+climbed on their papa's shoulders to see him,
+while Mr. Pupp sang loudly:
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  <i>Goodness gracious, don't you know it?<br>
+  Why, your lesson books must show it&mdash;<br>
+  You would have to be a CATERPILLAR first!</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+"Ladies and gentlemen, you will please
+sing the last line as a chorus," shouted Carlo,
+thumping on the piano.  And then they all
+began to sing as loudly and as fast as they
+could.  A perfect babel of voices arose, in
+what seemed a senseless mixture of words,
+and it sounded in the ears "of the children
+something like this:
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  <i>You would have to be a Caterpillar first.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A Caterpillar<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Paterkiller<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Lattertiller<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Ratterlillar<br>
+  You would have to be a Pillercater first.<br>
+  You would have&mdash;&mdash;</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+"I'm going to get out of this," said
+Tommy, scrambling through the crowd.
+"It's a shame!  I never said that."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Said what?" asked Gladys, pushing
+after him with Freda following close behind.
+"Who said you said anything?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But Tommy made his way to the edge
+of the crowd and began running along the
+promenade for his life.
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  <i>Paterkiller<br>
+  Latterkiller<br>
+  Ratterlillar</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+sang the Toys in chorus.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Good gracious, they're coming after
+us!" cried Freda.  "Run, Gladys!  I'm afraid
+of them."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Oh, how the children ran!  And behind
+them came the breathless panting crowd.
+Gollies, Pollies, Teddies, Dogs, Cats, Rabbits
+and Dolls, all mixed up together, and
+everyone shouting the chorus of Mr. Barker
+Pupp's song at the top of his voice.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Up the hill to the station sped Tommy;
+he burst in at the gate, passed the ticket
+collector like a shot, and got into the train.
+He drew the blinds down and sat in the
+farthest corner.  Horrors!  The door handle
+turned, but to his great relief it was only
+Freda, Gladys and John James.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Just in time!" said the latter, mopping
+his forehead.  "I'm sure we're much obliged
+to you for reminding us that it was time to
+catch the train.  We might all have been left
+behind."
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br><br></p>
+
+<p><a id="chap04"></a></p>
+
+<h2>
+CHAPTER IV.
+</h2>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  They rolled and scrambled and snarled and bit.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Then the whistle blew, for the time was up,<br>
+  And Kittens and Poodles were both hard hit&mdash;<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;But which of them won the Golliwog Cup?<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br></p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+CHAPTER IV.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+AT THE FOOTBALL MATCH.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There was great excitement in Golliwog
+football circles, for everybody was discussing
+the final match, between Poodleton and
+Kitten Town Tabbies, in the fight for the
+Golliwog Cup.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The G. &amp; T.B.R. were running special
+excursions from all parts and nearly
+everybody was going to see the match.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+You ought to have seen Tommy Stapleton's
+face when he heard the news.  It was
+just like any other boy's face would have
+been if you had suddenly told him that Cats
+and Dogs played football&mdash;and that is what
+John James had just been saying.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"You don't mean it," said Tommy.
+"Football?  Not really?  Here, let's have
+a look at the league table."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He seized <i>The Golliwog News</i> and read
+it eagerly for a few minutes.  In a very
+short space of time he could remember just
+how the clubs stood and could repeat them
+in their proper order with his eyes shut.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Here goes," he said: "Poodleton,
+Kitten Town, Frogland, Fish Town, Toy
+Town, Teddy Bear Rovers, Dolls House
+City."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"How <i>ever</i> do you remember them?"
+asked Freda.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Why, that's easy enough!" cried
+Tommy.  "I can remember that all right.
+Lessons?  Not much!  They're different.
+I say, John James, shall we take them to
+see the cup-tie?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James had had a fit of the sulks,
+and so had Carlo.  The fact was that the
+former played for Dolls House City and had
+been badly beaten by the Poodleton and
+Kitten Town clubs.  As for Carlo, he was
+just dying to play for Poodleton, and, of
+course he couldn't, because he was not a
+Poodle!
+</p>
+
+<p>
+However, they both brightened up when
+they heard Tommy's suggestion, and the
+long and the short of it was, that the party
+of little folks in whom we are interested was
+found upon the grand stand at Dolls House
+City waiting for the match to begin.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys and Freda had never been on
+a football ground before and they thought
+what good fun it was.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Two thousand Cats had come in by
+excursion train from Kitten Town, and most
+of them wore little red and white rosettes,
+the colours worn by the Tabbies.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Look at that funny Cat over there,
+with a red and white striped top hat on his
+head," said Gladys.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Freda nearly shrieked, he looked so comical.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He was turning round and round
+playing a concertina and cutting all sorts
+of silly capers.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James was holding his sides with
+laughter, and making a queer little gurgling
+noise in his throat.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"My Golly always sees the funny side
+of things," said Gladys proudly.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A crowd of friends had gathered round
+the Cat with the concertina, all singing and
+shouting and asking him wherever he got his hat.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A little distance away another Pussy
+was playing a lively catty tune on a mouth
+organ, which made the listening crowd very merry indeed.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Poodles too had brought a large
+number of supporters with them from Poodleton,
+and they also wore the colours of their
+favourites, which were black and yellow.
+One of them was actually wearing a suit
+striped all over with black and yellow.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+When he came in through the turnstiles
+he was greeted with roars of laughter from all sides.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It is more like a circus than a football
+match," said Gladys, glancing around.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A brass band had been engaged specially
+from Frogland-in-the-Marshes and the bandsmen
+were grouped in a ring in the centre
+of the field playing all kinds of lively airs.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There were about three thousand Teddy
+Bears all gathered together at one end of
+the field, and about the same number of
+Golliwogs at the other.  The two ends of
+the field were known as the Teddy Bear end
+and the Golliwog end, as they always
+congregated together in that way.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There were also a great number of
+Hoppers and Jumpers present from Frogland
+and hundreds of Toys from Toy Town.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I wouldn't have missed this on any
+account," said Freda.  "I had no idea
+football was so amusing."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy then explained that they had
+not begun to play yet.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Two minutes before the kick off, the
+Tabbies came on the field dressed in red
+and white jerseys and white knicker-bockers.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Here they come!" shouted Tommy,
+and everybody began to cheer.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In another minute the Poodles in their
+black and yellow jerseys and white knickerbockers
+came trotting out wagging their
+tails.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The cheering was again deafening, and
+it was very infectious too, for Gladys and
+Freda joined in.  How were they to help it
+when Tommy and the big Golly were cheering
+like mad?
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"What is that Teddy Bear with a whistle
+doing on the field?" asked Freda.  "He
+isn't going to play, is he?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James chuckled: "That's the
+referee," he said.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh, look!" exclaimed Gladys.  "I can
+see a Pussy and a Poodle shaking paws.
+What's that for?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy explained that the two captains
+always shook paws before they began to
+play.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"They'll spin a coin next for choice of
+ends," he continued.  "There it goes," he
+said.  "Head or tail?"
+</p>
+
+<p class="capcenter">
+<a id="img-069"></a>
+<br>
+<img class="imgcenter" src="images/img-069.jpg" alt="&quot;WASN'T THAT A FINE GOAL.&quot;">
+<br>
+&quot;WASN'T THAT A FINE GOAL.&quot;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Tabbies won, and chose to play
+towards the Golliwog end.  The teams lined
+up, the Teddy Bear blew his whistle and the
+players began kicking the ball about.  Or,
+at least, that was how it seemed to Gladys
+and Freda!
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy explained that the Tabbies were
+trying to kick the ball between the posts at
+the Golliwog end.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh, I see," said Gladys, "and the
+Poodles are trying to stop them."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Yes, and to kick the ball between
+the posts at the Teddy Bear end," he added,
+pleased to think that Gladys was beginning
+to understand the game.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Freda looked puzzled.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Haven't they got enough to do to
+keep the Tabbies from getting the ball
+through at that end, without trying to get
+it through at the other end themselves?" she
+enquired.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Poor Tommy began to look worried.
+He said he did not know what sort of a
+game that would be, but it would not be
+football.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+After that Freda was very quiet for
+a time and Gladys did not like to ask questions.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Still they enjoyed watching the game.
+The way the Tabbies ran after the ball, and
+arched their backs when the Poodles made
+a dash for it, was so very funny that the
+little girls laughed more heartily than ever.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There was a good deal of growling on
+the part of the Poodles, and the Teddy Bear
+referee often blew his whistle to give what
+Tommy called a foul.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"That's a foul," he would say to Gladys.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Where?" she would return.  "I didn't
+see it.  Where is it?  What, another?  Well,
+I don't see it anywhere, neither does Freda."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Then Tommy had to explain once more
+that it was not a "fowl" that was meant,
+but a "foul."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It sounds just the same," said Gladys.
+"I'm sure I thought you were talking about a chicken."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy sighed at this remark and
+appeared deeply interested in the game.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"The referee must be very tired with
+so much running about," whispered Freda.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+And just at that moment the poor little
+Teddy got hit in the waistcoat with the ball,
+and rolling over like a ninepin he nearly
+swallowed his whistle.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh, wasn't that funny!" shrieked John
+James, who had been very quiet for some
+minutes.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Funny!" repeated Gladys sternly.
+"I should think the poor thing is hurt.  It
+is much too dreadful to laugh at."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He was not very much injured, however,
+for he soon got up and the game went on as
+merrily as ever.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Whenever the Tabbies got the ball near
+the Golliwog end, the two thousand Pussies
+from Kitten Town would get very much
+excited and caterwaul for all they were worth.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+And when the Poodles looked like getting
+the ball through the Teddy Bear end, two
+thousand tails belonging to as many Poodles
+from Poodleton would start wagging.  And
+they would continue to wag until the ball
+went back to the other end of the field.  In
+fact, once or twice they nearly wagged the
+grand stand down.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The game went on for about half an
+hour, then the players rested for a few minutes,
+while the Frogland brass band came out
+and paraded from one end of the field to
+the other, playing several martial airs.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+When the band got tired of that, the
+footballers came out to play again, at least,
+that was what Gladys and Freda thought.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The sides had changed about and the
+Tabbies were kicking the ball towards the
+Teddy Bear end of the field.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh," thought Gladys to herself, "aren't
+they artful?  If they can't get it through
+at one end they mean to get it through at
+the other."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Poodles growled and worried away,
+and the Tabbies arched their backs with
+more vigour than before.  First a Puss would
+get rolled over, and then a Poodle, and their
+nice clean white knicker-bockers were
+beginning to get very dirty.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Carlo barked in high glee when he saw
+a Pussy bowled over, and John James was
+highly amused when a Poodle and a Puss
+fell over each other.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Several times each side came near to
+scoring a goal, and once a Tabby could easily
+have done it, only his tail got twisted round
+his legs, and when he tried to kick the ball
+he went tumbling head over heels.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Teddy referee got quite hot racing
+about, and he borrowed a large handkerchief
+from a Golliwog policeman to mop his face
+with.  And the policeman held his whistle
+the while!
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh," cried Gladys, "do look!  If he
+isn't having a blow with it!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Sure enough, the silly policeman was
+blowing himself quite fat in the face, and
+the players all thought the match was
+finished.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But the referee took a watch from his
+pocket and looked at it, and then told them
+they had another five minutes to play.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+So they all went at it again very hard,
+and a Poodle stopped the ball with his head.
+The ball rolled away and the Poodle ran
+round in a circle in a ridiculous kind of way
+and then lay flat on his back with his four
+legs sticking in the air.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The other players, Tabbies and Poodles
+alike, all gathered round him and after a
+time they stood him on his legs.  He was
+only a bit stunned, however, and was soon
+able to play again.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Tabbies were a sturdy lot of players
+and had been in special training at the
+seaside.  They scampered about and played all
+sorts of tricks on the Poodles, until at last
+one of the Dogs lost his temper and bit at
+a Pussy's tail!
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There were loud cries all round the
+field: "Turn him off."  And the assembly of
+strange animals and toys became very angry.
+The referee had the two offenders up
+together and cautioned them, for he knew
+very well that the Tabby must have done
+something too.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I saw him scratch the Poodle," said
+Freda.  "He did it before, and I thought
+it was part of the game."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It seemed as if neither side would be
+able to score a goal, but at last the Poodles
+got one.  It was just two minutes before
+the end of the game and everybody howled
+with delight&mdash;except, perhaps, the two
+thousand Cats from Kitten Town.  The air
+was thick with hats and the multitude of
+strange noises was so deafening it must have
+been heard a mile away!
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys and Freda, Tommy and the big
+Golliwog all stood on their seats and waved
+their hats in the air as madly as the rest
+of them.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Wasn't that a fine goal!" they were
+all saying.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+And there were cries of "Play up, my
+little Poodles!" from several of the admirers
+of the Doggies in black and Yellow.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+All the Poodles who were playing ran
+to shake paws with the one who scored the
+goal.  He was very good looking for a Poodle
+and wore a smart blue bow on his tail.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He was greeted with shouts of "Pretty
+boy!" from all round the ground.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There was no more scoring after that.
+The Tabbies quite lost their tempers and
+played like mad things, biting and scratching
+for all they were worth.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+After the match was over the Frogland
+brass band paraded through the streets of
+Dolls House City playing "See the
+Conquering Hero Comes."  In front of them
+marched a very solemn looking Froggie
+carrying on his shoulder a large board on
+which was chalked
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  POODLETON . . . . . . . . . . . . 1<br>
+  KITTEN TOWN TABBIES . . 3<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br><br></p>
+
+<p><a id="chap05"></a></p>
+
+<h2>
+CHAPTER V.
+</h2>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  We hear the views of Henry Toad,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Of Dolls, and Cats and Dogs,<br>
+  And angry shouting in the road<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Of "Votes for Pollywogs."<br>
+  While Mortimer turns out to be,<br>
+  A very popular M.P.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br></p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+CHAPTER V.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+THE DOLLS PARLIAMENT.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It had been a very dull dark day, and
+the children scarcely knew how to amuse
+themselves.  Gladys got all her toys out of
+the cupboard, and having arranged them in
+a row against the wall, proceeded to give
+each of them a scolding.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+She slapped Adeliza May, and reproved
+her for vanity.  She told the Billikins that
+he looked like a lunatic, and when she reached
+Mortimer Max, who was third in the row,
+(John James being the fourth), she smacked
+him on the head, and said he was looking
+defiant, and she would have no more nonsense
+from him.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It's too bad of you, Gladys!" cried
+Freda, the tender-hearted.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Go it, Gladys!" said Tommy, and
+he got out his pea-shooter, and began to
+shoot at Mortimer Max and the Billikins.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Mind your own business, both of you!"
+said Gladys shortly; and no one knows what
+might have happened next if the situation
+had not been relieved by the entrance of a
+Teddy telegraph boy, with a telegram.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys advanced to take the orange
+coloured envelope from him, but the messenger
+took no notice of her.  He handed the
+telegram briskly to John James.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+This was a bitter disappointment to
+Gladys.  She had never had a telegram in
+her life, and she had felt so sure that this one
+was for her.  Then she laughed and thought
+how very extraordinary everything seemed.
+She did not remember ever seeing a Teddy
+telegraph boy before, and this one was such
+a funny little fellow.  His hat was perched
+on one side and he carried himself as though
+he were the most important person in
+Golliwogland.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+His uniform was very smart and clean
+and was trimmed with red braid.  It was
+so exceedingly clean, that it occurred to
+Gladys he could not have been a telegraph
+boy very long; at any rate, he seemed very
+proud of his position, and while he was waiting
+to see if there happened to be an answer,
+he confided to Tommy that his one ambition
+in life was to become a postman.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James tore open the envelope
+with a very grubby thumb.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I don't suppose it is a real telegram,"
+said Gladys tossing her head.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James trembled just a little, for
+it flashed across his mind that perhaps his
+great-grandmother, who had lately celebrated
+her hundredth birthday, might have taken
+chicken-pox, or something like that.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+However, he heaved a sigh of relief
+when he read the message; with a wave
+of his hand he dismissed the messenger, and
+handed the telegram to Gladys.  Tommy
+and Freda rushed to peep over her shoulder,
+and this is what they read:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"<i>Don't forget to attend Dolls' Parliament
+to-night at six.</i>"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"That's from the Prime Minister," said
+John James grandly.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Isn't that splendid?" cried the children,
+clapping their hands.  "Of course we
+are coming too."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Then we had better go at once,"
+returned the Golliwog, and they all trooped
+after him, shouting with joy.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"The Speaker takes the chair in half
+an hour," remarked John James, "so we
+had better get a car."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+They noticed then for the first time
+that little electric cars were running in all
+directions.  There was one very queer Teddy
+Bear driver who drove his car along at a
+great rate, and rang his gong as loudly as
+he could, on purpose to scare the old and
+infirm Toys.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It was funny to see an elephant on
+crutches, jumping out of the way, and the
+children laughed very much, when, on being
+nearly run over, he dropped his crutches and
+ran away quite briskly without them.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Then the conductor who punched their
+tickets for them was a very nice-looking
+Teddy, and as straight as a Tin Soldier.
+He was very polite too; in fact, so polite that
+he omitted to take their fares, and when they
+mentioned it, he said it didn't matter at all.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+They soon reached the Parliament House,
+which was a very big building, and on one
+huge square tower there was a clock, which
+now said five minutes to six.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Several Golliwog policemen were guarding
+the entrance, and a large crowd of Toys
+stood there cheering the various M.P.'s as
+they arrived; and then just as our friends,
+piloted by John James, were about to cross
+the road, a taxi drove up, and there was
+much cheering, and cries of "The Prime
+Minister."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+At that precise moment, a Pollywog
+rushed into the middle of the road.  Gladys
+and Freda clutched John James, one on each
+side and shrieked:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"She'll be run over!&mdash;yes, she will."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Run in, you mean," said the policeman
+who stood near them, and he darted after
+her.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Meanwhile, the Pollywog had stopped
+exactly in front of the taxi, and dragging
+from under her cloak a green and violet flag,
+she waved it in the Prime Minister's face as
+he alighted, and shouted:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+  "Votes for Pollywogs."<br>
+</p>
+
+<p>
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A furious cry went up from the Teddy
+Bears and the Golliwogs standing near; then
+the policeman seized her by the shoulder,
+pulled her away, and the astonished Prime
+Minister was able to enter the House.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Pollywog, who was now infuriated,
+struggled and fought with the policeman
+who was trying to arrest her.  She managed
+to bite him so hard that three or four other
+constables had to come to his assistance,
+and eventually she was carried away shrieking
+"Votes for Pollywogs" at the very top of
+her voice.
+</p>
+
+<p class="capcenter">
+<a id="img-087"></a>
+<br>
+<img class="imgcenter" src="images/img-087.jpg" alt="&quot;THE BAGPIPES WERE PLAYED BY A FLAMINGO DRESSED IN A KILT AND WEARING A TAM-O-SHANTER.&quot;">
+<br>
+&quot;THE BAGPIPES WERE PLAYED BY A FLAMINGO DRESSED IN A KILT AND<br>
+WEARING A TAM-O-SHANTER.&quot;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys and Freda were very much
+excited about the affair, though they hardly
+knew what to make of it.  They wanted
+to know what would become of the Pollywog,
+and whether the policeman would take the
+green and violet flag away from her.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Don't bother about her now," said
+John James, leading the way into the House.
+"We shall have trouble to get you in after
+this, you see if we don't."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+And he was right.  The policeman at
+the door did not want to allow Gladys and
+Freda to pass, and made a lot of enquiries
+to see if they belonged to the "Votes for
+Pollywogs" people.  John James assured
+them that all was right, and after some
+conversation, and a gingerbread pressed
+into each policeman's hand, they were let in,
+and John James conducted them to the
+place where the reporters sat.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Naturally the other reporters were very
+much surprised to see John James
+accompanied by Tommy and the little girls, and
+a good deal of whispering went on.  A very
+fat doll wanted to know whether the ladies
+would mind if he took his collar off, as he
+could always work better without it.  The
+children stared at him gravely for a minute,
+then they began to look round the House.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It was the queerest place they had ever
+seen.  All along one side of the building
+a large number of particularly intelligent
+Pussies were seated.  Facing them were the
+Doggie Benches, while at one end there were
+quite a lot of Frogs, in stand-up collars and
+starched cuffs.  There were Teddy Bears
+and Dolls, in short, every Toy was
+represented&mdash;except the Pollywog!
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The business of the evening soon began,
+and then the reporters scribbled as if their
+very lives depended on it&mdash;and perhaps they
+did!  The Fat Doll nearly rolled off his seat,
+and one of his friends took hold of him by
+a string that was round his waist and hauled
+him up again; but what struck the children
+as very strange was that he said "Papa"
+and "Mamma" very fast, until the other
+fellow let go.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Bill being considered was The
+Nursing of Dolls Bill, brought in by the
+Keeper of the Money-Box, and there was
+to be the final division on it that night.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy heard the Fat Doll say that it
+was likely to be an all-night sitting, and that
+he had brought a packet of acid drops with
+him.  He passed them round and John
+James sucked one critically.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I hope it is an all-night sitting,"
+whispered Tommy to the little girls.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It strikes me we are going to see some
+fun.  But who on earth is the Keeper of the
+Money-Box?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Hush&mdash;sh!" said John James "He
+is the Gollywog who makes us all pay taxes,
+and he has his work cut out too, poor chap.
+You should just see how some of them are
+fighting this Nursing of Dolls Bill."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Which side are you on, John James?"
+asked Gladys curiously&mdash;"you like being
+nursed, don't you?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But the Golliwog would not say.  He
+remarked that his politics were his own
+affair, and that an important paper like
+<i>The Golliwog News</i> could not be too careful.
+There was no time to press the subject
+further, for the debate began.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The first to address the House was the
+member for East Frogland&mdash;Henry Toad, Esq.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He spoke very strongly against the Bill;
+asking in an angry tone why the House was
+always passing Bills for the benefit of Dolls.
+Was it not time they did something for the
+relief of other classes?&mdash;namely, the Froggies.
+(Murmurs of approval from the Froggie
+benches).
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He proceeded to draw a moving picture
+of helpless Frogs being chased and stoned
+by boys.  (".Shame.")  "But that is not
+the worst," he said with a loud croak.
+"Why, in some parts, we are subjected to
+the most cruel and horrible torture imaginable,
+cut up in slices and eaten&mdash;actually
+eaten."  (Sensation).
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I shall take hops shortly," said Mr. Toad,
+as he resumed his seat, "to bring before
+this House a measure which will provide
+a larger amount of protection for my kith
+and kin."  (Loud Froggie croaks).
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys felt so much interested in what
+was passing, that she scarcely had time to
+notice John James.  Now she glanced over
+her shoulder and saw that he was scribbling
+notes as quickly as ever he could.  She
+smiled proudly to herself as she remembered
+that every word Mr. Toad had said, would
+be in the paper the following morning.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The next speaker was the member for
+Kitten Town&mdash;Mr. Thomas Purr-Catt.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Look!  Look!" cried Freda in a loud
+whisper.  "That is the very Cat we saw on
+our way to Toy Town.  Look!  He's putting
+up his eye-glass."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Shut up!" said Tommy sternly, putting
+his hand over her mouth.  "They'll think
+you're a Pollywog."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mr. Thomas Purr-Catt was in favour
+of the Bill, and thought that Dolls were
+really nursed too much (hear, hear).  He
+would be glad, however, if the Keeper of the
+Money-Box could see his way to include
+Kittens in the Bill.  (Loud me-ows from
+the Catty side of the House).  They were
+nursed quite as much as Dolls were, and
+some reform was needed in that direction.
+His party, however, would be satisfied with
+the Bill as it stood, for they regarded it as
+a step in the right direction.  (General noises
+from all sides of the House.)
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The member for the central division
+of Dolls House City was greeted with loud
+applause as he rose to address the House,
+but Gladys opened her eyes very widely,
+and nearly fell off her chair when she saw
+who it was that they were making such a
+fuss about.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It was actually Mortimer Max!  He
+had taken his wig off, and was dressed like
+an ordinary person, that was why she had
+not recognised him before.  She stood up,
+and was going to call out to him, when
+Tommy seized her arm.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"You girls oughtn't to have come," he
+said impatiently.  "Talk about the Pollywogs,
+you're much worse.  If you are not
+careful the whole crowd will attack us."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys sat down again.  She hardly
+knew what to make of it.  She had had no
+idea that Mortimer Max was an M.P. and
+was really very much astonished.  Why had
+he never told her?  She made up her mind
+to tell him what she thought when she got
+him alone again.  However, she had no time
+to think of that now, for Mortimer Max had
+begun to speak and she badly wanted to
+hear what he had to say.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mortimer Max said he never saw the
+advent of a Bill with greater pleasure than
+the one under discussion.  The length of
+time some dolls were nursed was a disgrace.
+It was high time this particular injustice
+was removed.  It was not only in the matter
+of nursing, but in the general treatment
+they received.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"In my own case," said Mortimer sadly,
+"I am often smacked on the head by my
+mistress, Miss Gladys."  (Laughter, and cries
+of "Shame.")
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys, who had been greatly shocked
+at the sentiments expressed by her dear
+Mortimer, flushed scarlet at this remark.
+It seemed as if all eyes in the House were
+directed towards her, and she felt hot and
+cold by turns.  She glanced uneasily at
+John James.  He was scribbling fast!
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Yes," proceeded the member for the
+central division of Dolls House City, warming
+to his subject, "I frequently get smacked
+and pinched for no earthly reason.  She
+calls me Naughty Morty, when I haven't
+done anything at all, and of course I don't
+like it."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh, you wicked thing!" groaned
+Gladys.  "Won't I give it to you!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"But that is not the worst," continued
+Mortimer, while the House listened with
+rapt attention, "I don't mind what she does
+to me very much, but when she ill-treats my
+sister, Adeliza May, it makes my sawdust go
+all of a shiver."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I don't ever ill-treat her!" shrieked
+Gladys, but no one seemed to hear her.  Only
+the reporters scribbled faster than ever.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Adeliza May is a very pretty Doll,"
+went on Mortimer, "and the other day a
+young boy, named Tommy Stapleton, who
+comes to have tea with Miss Gladys sometimes,
+tried to poke one of her eyes out with
+a knitting needle.  He also shot at me, and
+at a very intelligent Billikins, with a
+pea-shooter."  (Sensation).
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It was now Tommy's turn to feel small,
+and he shook his fist at Mortimer Max.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"But you did do it, Tommy,"
+whispered Freda at his side.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Do you call that fair treatment?"
+shouted Mortimer, hammering on the table
+with his fist.  (Wild cries of "No!")
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I tell you," thundered Mortimer, "that
+thousands of Dolls are being maimed for
+life every year, and this wholesale butchery
+must be stopped."  (Cheers.)
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Even where there is no direct cruelty,
+the nursing so many Dolls get coddles them
+up and makes them good for nothing.  Their
+constitutions must become weakened and
+we know very well that it is all U.P. with
+a Doll who gets measles or whooping cough.
+This Bill must become law, if the future
+generations of Dolls are to grow up worthy
+members of that illustrious race, a race,
+I repeat&mdash;aye, am proud to repeat,&mdash;a race
+of which I am a member!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mortimer Max sat down, and nearly
+everybody in the House stood up, shouting
+and waving his hat in the air.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James, the Fat Doll, and the other
+reporters were writing for their very lives,
+and even Gladys could not help feeling
+pleased that Mortimer seemed so popular.
+After John James he was her favorite Toy.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+When the noise had subsided, Mr. William
+Dogg, a very cross looking bull-pup, who sat
+for West Dogton, rose to speak.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mr. Dogg said he considered the Bill
+a great mistake.  If anyone had a Doll, he
+had a perfect right to do what he liked with
+it.  He, for one, had no patience with the
+grandmotherly tendencies shown by the
+Keeper of the Money-Box.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"At any rate," he said, "if the two
+hours limit is passed, there will, perhaps, be
+a good deal more time for Dolls to be worried
+in other ways."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Here Mr. Dogg showed all his teeth and
+snapped at a fly.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There were loud cries of anger, and
+members everywhere rose in their seats,
+and made noises at the bull-pup.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Speaker called "Order," but his
+voice was scarcely heard above the din.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Prime Minister then tried to address
+the House, but it was not the slightest
+use&mdash;the noise was deafening.  The children put
+their fingers in their ears, but they could not
+keep it out.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Several Dolls and one or two prominent
+Cats, made an attempt to seize the member
+for West Dogton, while a number of
+Doggies&mdash;and Carlo was among them&mdash;came to the
+assistance of their leader, and the children
+thought matters would end up in a free fight.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I wish we had never come," wailed Freda.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"So do I," said Gladys, tugging at John
+James' arm to attract his attention.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It's all right&mdash;it's all right," said John
+James hastily; "this sort of thing often
+happens."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy felt dubious about that, and
+the girls were really frightened, but as the
+Fat Doll and all the pressmen were laughing,
+and seizing this opportunity of cracking up
+acid drops, they thought perhaps nobody
+would get killed after all.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Cries of "Withdraw!" were shouted,
+and at length the bull-pup consented to
+withdraw what he had said, and then
+everybody returned to his place.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+When the division was called it was very
+amusing to see the various M.P.'s voting on
+the Bill.  Some of the Froggies voted for
+it, and rubbed shoulders with Mortimer
+Max and his party, who had gone solid for
+the Bill.  The Teddies and Golliwogs were
+nearly all for it, but a few did not vote at all.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+When the result was announced, showing
+a majority of seventy-nine for the Bill, the
+air was rent with the queerest set of noises
+the children had ever heard in their lives, for
+everyone seemed greatly excited about it.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The big clock on the tower now struck
+three, and they all began to talk about going
+home.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It's cold," said Freda with chattering
+teeth, as they went down the steps; then
+she laughed, for the Fat Doll pushed past
+them, with his collar in his hand and his
+necktie wound round his throat like a
+bandage.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Papa"&mdash;"Mamma," he cried, as he
+jostled through the crowd.
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br><br></p>
+
+<p><a id="chap06"></a></p>
+
+<h2>
+CHAPTER VI
+</h2>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  "Tis not for me to flaunt and boast<br>
+  That I have never left my post."<br>
+  The Scarecrow coughed,&mdash;a gentle hint,<br>
+  For more of Freda's peppermint.<br>
+  Then read how once a cruel blast<br>
+  Had hurled him from his post at last.<br>
+  And how Sir Hawk so swiftly flew<br>
+  To summon twelve good crows and true.<br>
+  And how, quite suddenly that day,<br>
+  They every one were "scared" away.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br></p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+CHAPTER VI.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+THE SCARECROW.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy was tired of his tin soldiers.
+He had been having a very exciting battle
+in the parlour, and was quite worn out with
+it.  Also, he had managed to break a valuable
+vase, and his mother had said that she really
+could not have such rough games played
+in the house any more.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy was very sorry that he had
+hit the vase with his pea-shooter, but he
+felt it to be against his dignity to be found
+fault with, so he piled his toys away, and
+ran over the road to play with Gladys.  On
+the way, he met Freda Morris starting out
+on the same errand, and she told him a strange
+story about a Scarecrow that was in one of
+her father's fields.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"He is dressed just like a real person,"
+said Freda, "only his clothes are rather old.
+I have seen him in that field ever since I can
+remember.  But yesterday, Tommy,"&mdash;Freda
+dropped her voice to a mysterious
+whisper&mdash;"yesterday, as I was getting over
+the stile near Long Meadow, I heard him
+coughing, I did really."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Go on!" said Tommy incredulously.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Well, I did," repeated Freda.  "But
+I didn't like to speak to him."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Well, never mind him now," said
+Tommy.  "Let's go and play with Gladys,
+at hunting on the prairie."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Freda agreed, and they very quickly
+found Gladys.  She was in the nursery
+making a new hat for Adeliza May, but she
+left off at once and found some peacocks'
+feathers to stick in her hair, because Tommy
+said she was to be a Red Indian prowling
+about after deer, and he and Freda would
+be two Englishmen hunting buffaloes, and
+they must shoot at her because she was
+stealing.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+They had a very exciting game.  The
+two Englishmen shot the Red Indian with
+a walking stick, and he fell over on the
+hearth-rug terribly wounded.  Then suddenly
+he rose and scalped the Englishmen, and
+chased them under the sofa, where they lay
+panting for breath.  After a time, however,
+and a great deal of strange talking, which
+Gladys said was Red Indian, they all became
+friendly and decided to light a fire and smoke
+the pipe of peace.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+So to begin with, Tommy tried to strike
+a match on his boot, as he had sometimes
+seen other boys do.  But as it would not
+light, he threw it away, and forgot all about
+it till there was a great fizz inside the dolls'
+house, where the match had fallen, and a
+tiny flame burst out of the kitchen window.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh, dear!" cried Gladys, "the dolls'
+house is on fire, and Adeliza May is inside
+with her best frock on.  Water!  Where is
+some water?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+She ran out of the room and fetched
+the jug from her washstand, and Tommy
+tipped it over the dolls' house.  The water
+ran all over the floor, and through the ceiling
+into the kitchen, where Jane was talking to
+the cook, and that is how she guessed that
+something was the matter and came rushing
+up to see what it was.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Well, Miss Gladys and Miss Freda!
+Well, Master Thomas!" she cried, when she
+saw what had taken place.  "I wouldn't
+have believed that two young ladies and a
+young gentleman could do such depredations,
+and Cook and me so busy we don't know
+what to do first."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It was an accident," said Gladys
+meekly.  "Shall I help you wipe it up?
+I am very sorry."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But Jane was not to be pacified.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"You'd better go out for a walk," she
+said crossly, "while I get the place straight
+again.  Oh, my goodness!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+So the three children stole down into
+the garden thinking it would be nicer to have
+a romp there than to stay with Jane and
+that fearful mess on the floor.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"What was that you were telling me
+about the Scarecrow?" said Tommy to
+Freda as they hurried along.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh!" cried Freda, "couldn't we go
+and see him now&mdash;this very minute?  The
+Scarecrow, Gladys, in my daddy's field.
+Yesterday I heard him coughing.  I've got
+a few peppermints in my pocket&mdash;shall we
+go and give him one?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Yes, of course," said Gladys, very
+pleased at the idea.  "Here's John James,
+let him come too if he will."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James was very willing to accompany
+them, so Gladys picked him up, and
+off scampered the merry trio, until they
+reached the forlorn-looking object.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"You speak first," said Tommy giving Freda a push.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"No, no.  Let Gladys," replied Freda timidly.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+So Gladys cleared her throat.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Good morning, Mr. Scarecrow," she said.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Good morning, ma'am," the old fellow
+replied in a quavering voice.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys felt very proud at being called ma'am.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Take a chair," he went on&mdash;"I mean,
+won't you sit down?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The children sat down on the trunk of
+a tree and surveyed the Scarecrow from head
+to foot.  He had on a hat with a dent in the
+top, rather a good coat, but his trousers were
+frayed at the ankles, and he had only one
+leg; indeed, it seemed to be a very difficult
+matter for him to stand up at all.  Certainly
+the poor old chap was wheezing, and he had
+a very bad cough.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"On my chest," he said to Freda, when
+she offered him a peppermint.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"You ought not to be out in this cold
+wind," said Gladys.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"No, indeed," he replied, "I am past
+the job now.  The birds get mortal cheeky!"  Here
+the Scarecrow was seized with a violent
+fit of coughing, which continued until Gladys
+patted him on the back.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Mortal cheeky!" he resumed.  "Just
+before you came I tried to scare a Robin,
+but he took no notice of me at all.  He
+told me he would come next Spring and
+build a nest in my hat.  That is the biggest
+piece of impudence I've ever had to put up
+with.  Scare-crowing is most certainly not
+the profession it used to be."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James, who had been listening
+very attentively, now found his voice.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"This will make good copy for the
+<i>News</i>," he said, taking his note book out of
+his pocket.  "Perhaps you will tell us
+something more about yourself?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Scarecrow seemed a bit doubtful.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"What paper do you represent," he
+enquired cautiously.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I am the Editor of <i>The Golliwog News</i>,"
+said John James proudly.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Really!" cried the Scarecrow, his
+thin face lighting up with pleasure.  "That's
+a very respectable paper, and I have no
+objection to telling you a little,&mdash;but mind
+you, I wouldn't give any information to some
+of the other papers, not if you'd give me a
+new hat!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"When did you first take to scarecrowing?"
+asked John James.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I've been in the business ever since
+I can remember.  In fact, I have been told
+that I am a born Scarecrow.  My father
+was a Scarecrow before me, so it may be
+hereditary.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"He was a good father to me," continued
+the Scarecrow his eyes filling with tears at
+the remembrance of his aged parent.  "Never
+let me lark about with other scarecrows of
+my age, always kept me strictly to business.
+He caught a chill one bitter night, and became
+very ill, but, would he leave his post?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Scarecrow looked round fiercely as
+if he hoped someone might contradict him.
+"Would he leave his post?" he repeated
+severely, and looked at the children so hard
+that Freda felt she ought to say something,
+especially as this was her father's field.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I don't suppose he would?" she ventured.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Not he," snapped the Scarecrow, "and
+what is more, no member of our family ever
+has left his post."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Perhaps you would tell us how you
+came to lose your leg!" asked John James
+trying to change the conversation.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"That was a great blow to me," said
+the Scarecrow sorrowfully.  "It was the
+beginning of the end, for I shall not last
+much longer now.  I used to be as strong
+and hearty a Scarecrow as you would find
+in a day's march, now I am eaten up with
+rheumatism, and find it a hard matter to
+stand out here in these rough winds at all.
+They are almost enough to blow one off one's
+legs&mdash;I mean one's leg.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Well, one day there were a number
+of pigeons stealing the corn quite close to
+me.  I had been awake nearly all night, and
+was just having a snooze, so didn't know
+they were there, when&mdash;<i>bang!</i> I woke with
+a start and a stinging pain in my leg, and
+there stood Mr. Morris with a smoking gun
+in his hand.  In firing at the thieves he had
+accidently shot me in the leg.  I was
+removed to the Wood Limbo Hospital, where
+it was found necessary to amputate the limb
+above the knee.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It was rather hard on me," he continued
+after a pause.  "I lost a leg, but down
+at the house they had pigeon pie."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I am sure father would be sorry if he
+knew," began Freda, but the Scarecrow did
+not hear her; he was clearing his voice by
+giving a series of tremendous "Ahems."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Too much talking makes me worse," he gasped.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Then I think we had better go now,"
+said Gladys, "and we will come and see you
+again soon.  You have talked quite enough
+for the present."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A whole week went by, and the children
+had apparently forgotten all about their
+visit to the Scarecrow, but they were suddenly
+reminded by John James.  He had been
+lying on the sofa, with his legs sticking in
+the air.  A very undignified attitude&mdash;so
+the children thought&mdash;for the Editor of
+<i>The Golliwog News</i>.  While they were watching
+him, he got on his feet and began to rub his eyes.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Silly old thing, pretending you have
+been asleep," said Gladys scornfully.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James frowned.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I've got an inquest to attend at three
+o'clock," he said.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Well, it's after three now," Gladys told him.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I'm off, then," he shouted, rushing out
+of the room.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Of course they all followed him, tearing
+along like mad things, while John James
+led the way to Farmer Morris' field.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"We're in time," he gasped breathlessly,
+as they reached the large wooden gate.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"They are just swearing in the jury."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Our young friends were all eyes at once.
+They looked across and saw the poor old
+Scarecrow was lying on the ground, and
+twelve black crows, forming the jury, were
+arranged in a ring round him.  When they
+reached the spot the foreman had just been
+elected, and the Coroner, a wise-looking old
+Hawk, was perched on a tree stump where he
+could keep his eye on the prostrate Scarecrow.
+The children hastily found seats just
+behind the jury, where they could get a
+splendid view of the whole proceedings.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The first witness called was Mr. Peter
+Bunney, who nodded and smiled at Gladys.
+He had first discovered the death of the
+Scarecrow.  He said he was crossing the
+field late on the previous night, on his way
+to a cabbage patch on the other side, when
+he thought he heard singing.  Believing it
+to be some friends of his returning from a
+little party, witness went nearer, and on
+putting up his ear-trumpet, discovered that
+the sound he had heard was the Scarecrow's
+violent coughing.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The poor old fellow's hat, Mr. Peter
+Bunney proceeded to state, was blown off
+by a gust of wind.  Witness attempted
+to chase it, but without success.  Then
+another blast of wind, more furious than
+the last, bowled the Scarecrow completely
+over.  He made no effort to rise, and witness,
+after trying hard to assist him, placed his
+ear-trumpet near the Scarecrow's heart and
+listened intently.  He could hear no sound
+and was therefore forced to the conclusion
+that their friend had breathed his last.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The next witness was Mr. Robin, who
+said he had spent a great deal of time in the
+vicinity of the Scarecrow during the last few
+days, and that he was not surprised to find
+the old chap "off his perch" that morning.
+He had had frequent conversations with the
+Scarecrow and noticed that he had lately
+become very "touchy," which witness
+attributed to advancing age.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Questioned by the Coroner, Mr. Robin
+admitted threatening to build a nest in the
+Scarecrow's hat, but explained that he had
+no serious intention of doing so, because his
+wife was terribly afraid of deceased and would
+on no account go near him.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Did he appear alarmed by your
+remark?" asked the foreman of the jury.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"He did," replied the Robin, "but as
+I considered him feeble-minded I thought no
+more about it."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Doctor Drake then said that in his
+opinion deceased had been suffering from
+the "flu."  He ought not to have been out
+on such a night as that upon which he met
+his death, but it was common knowledge
+that these Scarecrows were very much
+devoted to their employers, and could on
+no account be prevailed upon to leave their
+posts.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The jury then retired to a corner of the
+field to consider their verdict.  It took them
+a very long time, and the children had begun
+to fidget a little.  Tommy had screwed up
+his mouth ready to whistle, when quite
+suddenly he unscrewed it.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He nudged Gladys and Freda, who were
+sitting on either side of him.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Look at the Scarecrow," he whispered.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The little girls did so, and to their intense
+surprise they distinctly saw him wink.  There
+could be no mistake about it, for while they
+were still looking, he did it again.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I don't believe he's dead at all," said
+Gladys softly.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"He's as right as ninepence, the artful
+old beggar!" said Tommy, and he was about
+to attract the attention of the Coroner, when
+the Scarecrow frowned, and shook his head,
+as if entreating him to be silent.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In a few minutes the jury returned
+in a talkative and jovial mood.  One of
+them hummed a little tune, and looked
+contemptuously at the prostrate figure.
+Evidently they were all very pleased to think
+that they were now free to come and go in
+Farmer Morris' field just as much as they
+liked.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Now we shall see some fun," remarked
+Tommy, as the foreman of the jury rose to
+deliver the verdict.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"We rejoice to find," he began, giving
+the Scarecrow a vicious little peck, "that our
+deceased&mdash;er&mdash;friend&mdash;&mdash;"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But he got no further, for suddenly the
+Scarecrow rose, stood on his leg, and surveyed
+the Coroner and jury with a solemn eye.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+For a moment they were too much
+amazed to move.  Then, with a tremendous
+flutter, and a series of terrified squawks, they
+all flew away, without leaving so much as
+a feather behind them.
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br><br></p>
+
+<p><a id="chap07"></a></p>
+
+<h2>
+CHAPTER VII.
+</h2>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  Relates how naughty Spottikins<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Had caught a cheeky Sparrow,<br>
+  Who told some very wondrous tales,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;About a bow and arrow.<br>
+  How Gladys, Tom, and Freda liked<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;His stories gay and witty,<br>
+  So on the G. and T.B.R.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;They went to Birdland City.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br></p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+CHAPTER VII.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+BIRDLAND CITY.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"You are a wicked, cruel cat!" shrieked
+Gladys, breathlessly, chasing Spottikins round
+and round the garden, and in and out amongst
+the gooseberry bushes.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"A nasty, vicious, greedy horrid thing,
+to catch a poor little bird, and then purr
+as if you'd done something clever!  Oh&mdash;oh&mdash;I've
+got you at last!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+She thumped Spottikins on the back,
+till she opened her mouth and a small brown
+bird fell out of it.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Spottikins spat at Gladys&mdash;she really
+did.  And then she walked off with her fur
+bristling and her tail in the air, while Gladys
+picked up the poor little Sparrow and took
+him into the nursery.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+She made him a bed with an old shawl,
+and stroked his soft throat, for it was wet
+where Spottikins had held him.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"She nearly choked the breath out of
+you," said Gladys, touching one tiny claw.
+"And how dreadfully afraid you must have
+been!&mdash;What?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+She started back, for the claw suddenly
+fastened round her finger, and the little bird
+perched himself on her wrist.  He looked
+at her sideways with his bright little eyes.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I'm not afraid of anything," he chirped,
+and he began to preen his feathers.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Not afraid of anything?" repeated Gladys.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"No," continued the Sparrow.  "It
+doesn't do to be afraid.  Why, I get
+pecked to death every night of my life,"
+he said with emphasis, gazing at Gladys
+the while in order to see what effect his
+words had upon her.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Pecked to death every night of
+life!" repeated Gladys.  "That's silly.  You
+couldn't be."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Sparrow chuckled wickedly.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I was last night, anyway," he said.
+Gladys looked at him severely for a
+moment or two, then she said:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"That's worse than silly.  It's not true.
+Because if you had been pecked to death,
+you wouldn't be alive now, would he, Freda?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Of course not," said Freda gravely.
+"You would be dead, you see."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh, but I shouldn't," argued the Sparrow.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Yes, you would," answered Gladys.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I shouldn't."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"You would."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Shouldn't."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys was getting angry, when Tommy
+came bounding into the room.  Immediately
+she appealed to him.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Tommy, if a&mdash;a&mdash;person, I mean a
+bird,&mdash;got pecked to death, wouldn't he be dead now?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"That's easy," said Tommy.  "Of course he would.  Why?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Well, this sparrow says he gets pecked
+to death every night and yet he isn't dead."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy surveyed the Sparrow with interest.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I say, that's a little too tall," he remarked.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Sparrow, who had now finished
+preening his feathers, began to laugh in an
+aggravating manner.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Well," he said at last between his
+chuckles, "I'm an actor, and that's my part,
+you know.  I'm the villain, and they peck
+me to death.  See?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Why couldn't you say so before,"
+said Gladys crossly, "instead of talking in
+that silly way.  I wish Spottikins had eaten
+you.  Yes, I do."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Here, shut up!" whispered Tommy in
+her ear.  "Perhaps he will tell us something
+about the play and all that, you know."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Then aloud to the Sparrow, he said:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"We should very much like to see you
+act your part.  Will you tell us where you
+are appearing just now?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Why, don't you know?" asked the
+Sparrow.  "At the Hall-in-the-Wood, of
+course, the most magnificent edifice in Birdland
+City, and we get a full house every night,
+now that Cock Robin is on."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Cock Robin, is it?" cried Freda.  "Oh,
+how I should like to see him!  Robins are
+such dear little birds."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I can't say I care much for this one,"
+said the Sparrow trying to reach a ruffle at
+the very back of his neck.  "He's such a
+proud little beggar, and gives himself
+dreadful airs, just because they applaud
+so when he comes on the stage."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"How far is it to Birdland City?"
+asked Tommy in a business-like voice.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"As far again as a half," replied the
+Sparrow, hopping to the window sill.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh, stop!&mdash;do stop just a minute!"
+cried Gladys suddenly.  "I rescued you from
+Spottikins, you know I did.  Won't you
+tell us how we can get to the Hall-in-the-Wood?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Can't stop.  Rehearsal at twelve.
+Here, you can have these; come, if you can,"
+and out flew the Sparrow through the window,
+while the children gazed after him open-mouthed.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy was the first to recover himself.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"He threw something on the floor," he
+said, stooping to see what it was.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Why, it's three tickets for the play
+to-night!" exclaimed Freda.  "Look, Gladys,
+front seats too."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+She held up three brown leaves, which
+had printed on them:
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  HALL-IN-THE-WOOD.<br>
+  WHO KILLED COCK ROBIN?<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  To-night at eight.<br>
+  Front Seats.  Early Doors.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+"We must go," cried Gladys.  "Where's
+John James?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Here I am," replied the Golliwog,
+"What is it?  Where are you going?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"To Birdland City to see Cock Robin.
+Do you know the way, John James?  Oh,
+dear, we haven't got a ticket for you.  What
+ever shall we do?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James grinned.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I can get in without one," he said.
+"They'll be only too glad to get a notice in
+the <i>News</i>.  And I'll tell you what, we might
+get there early, and I'll go round to the back
+and interview Cock Robin, and a few of 'em
+while they're making up."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh, John James, how splendid!" cried
+Gladys, hugging him, "You do think of
+lovely things."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Don't kiss the paint off my nose," said
+John James disengaging himself.  "I must
+look as well as possible to-night.  I shall try
+to interview the Dove if I can, and she's
+a very particular person indeed."
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  <i>Who'll be chief mourner?<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I, said the Dove,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;For I mourn for my love.<br>
+  I'll be chief mourner.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+"Is that the one you mean?" asked Freda.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"The same," said John James, "and
+a prettier little piece of goods I never saw."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"You don't like her better than me,
+do you?" asked Gladys anxiously.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James got out his note book.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"We'd better be off," he said, "or we
+shan't be in time."  And they started off
+on the Golliwog and Teddy Bear Railway,
+before Gladys had time to notice that he had
+not answered her question.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+When they got out at Birdland City,
+they saw a board fixed in a chestnut tree
+with these words on it:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"This way to the Hall-in-the-Wood,"
+and a bird's claw pointed towards the right
+direction.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Right-oh," said Tommy striding along,
+and by and by they saw the twinkling of
+lights in the distance, a strange building
+loomed up before them, and the next minute
+they stood outside the Hall-in-the-Wood.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It was very curiously fashioned, something
+like a huge tree, with many wide
+spreading branches, where the audience could
+perch comfortably.  Although it was so early,
+a number of birds had already assembled, and
+formed a long queue outside, waiting
+impatiently to be let in.  As the tickets which
+our friends now presented were for admittance
+by "early doors," they were shown to their
+places without any delay by an obsequious
+Chaffinch.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I'll go round to the Green Room,"
+whispered John James, and off he went to
+the door at the back of the Hall, intent upon
+interviewing Cock Robin.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He found that gentleman in a daintily
+furnished apartment, upholstered in soft
+green moss.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"So you want to interview me, do
+you?" said the Robin condescendingly, as
+the Golliwog was shown in.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"If you could spare me five minutes,"
+replied John James.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"What paper do you represent?" enquired
+the Robin, as he put an extra dash
+of colour on his scarlet breast, and then
+rubbed it off again.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James presented his card.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Hum!&mdash;<i>The Golliwog News</i>!"  The
+Robin was visibly pleased.  "Well, you can
+ask me a few questions if you like," he said.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Could you tell me anything interesting
+about your early days?" asked John James
+sharpening his pencil.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Robin considered.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"My ancestors were all highly respectable
+people," he said, "and all of them
+possessed the dramatic instinct.  My great
+grandfather was one of the original Robins
+who placed dead leaves over the Babes in
+the Wood.  It was in this very wood, too,
+and not one hundred yards from this very
+Hall.  But that, of course, was years before
+this place was built."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I must make a special note of that,"
+said John James.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I have taken the part of Cock Robin
+for over three hundred nights," continued
+the vain little bird, "and received tremendous
+applause every time.  I don't want to sing my
+own praises, but I may venture to say&mdash;and
+of course you need not put this in the paper,
+unless you particularly wish to do so&mdash;that
+I am the most popular person in this piece.
+In fact," he continued, in a low voice, "I am
+the chief attraction."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I quite agree with you," said John
+James suavely, writing rapidly.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I suppose," he added, "that the other
+members of the company admire and envy
+your histrionic powers?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Robin coughed, and surveyed himself
+in a large swinging mirror.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Well, between you and me," he began
+confidentially, "they are all jealous of my
+popularity, especially the Sparrow, whose
+very minor part is as much as he can manage.
+I have heard on excellent authority&mdash;&mdash;"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Here a noise outside interrupted the
+Robin's flow of eloquence.  A rustle, rustle,
+as of a lady's silk petticoat, was heard in
+the passage and a loud banging of doors
+sent a sudden draught through the
+Hall-in-the-Wood.  The door handle was turned,
+and as John James looked up, a beautifully
+plumed grey Dove burst into the Robin's
+private dressing-room.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+When she saw the Robin she laughed
+immoderately.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh, dear!  I <i>am</i> so sorry!" she cried,
+giggling very much, and trying to stuff
+her handkerchief into her beak.  "So stupid
+of me.  Hee-hee-hee.  Forgive me, Mr. Robin,
+I opened the wrong door by accident.
+Ho-ho-ho.  You <i>do</i> look smart.  And who
+is the gentleman with the note book?
+A newspaper man?  Well, well!  Come and
+see me when you've finished here, and I'll
+tell you something to put in the paper.
+Goodbye."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+She rustled out again, banged the door
+behind her, and as she went to her own
+room they could distinctly hear her faint
+"Hee-hee," and then in shrill tones: "My
+dear, such a joke!  I went into that <i>horrid</i>
+Robin's room by accident, and&mdash;&mdash;"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Just like her!" cried the Robin
+wrathfully, when the last sound of her voice
+had died away.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"She's always doing things like that.
+Well, you'll have to excuse me now,
+Mr. Golliwog, or I shan't be ready when
+the curtain rises."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James hurried away, and found
+the Dove without much difficulty.  A Wren
+was standing on a chair dropping something
+into her eyes to make them look large and
+mournful.  As John James was announced,
+she was so startled that she tipped the bottle
+and the fluid ran all over the Dove's feathers
+and down on to the floor.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Careless thing!" said the Dove
+laughing, and giving the little Wren a playful
+peck.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Now you'd better wipe it up.  Be off,
+and fetch Mr. Robin's silk neckerchief&mdash;that
+will do nicely."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Then she turned to John James.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I like worrying Mr. Robin," she
+remarked with a charming smile.  "He is so
+proud of his fancied popularity.  And really,
+everyone knows that he has nothing to do,
+only to lie still and be carried about in a
+starch box.  Now, my part requires genuine
+skill.  Emotional, you see.  So difficult to
+manage one's voice."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Have you been acting this part long?"
+asked John James, trying to keep her strictly
+to the business in hand.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Dove shut her eyes.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Not very long.  I am still so young
+you see.  It seems only the other day that
+mamma said to me&mdash;&mdash;"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"May I ask what is your favourite
+recreation?" said John James.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Walking, I think," was the reply,
+"with plenty of people looking on, you
+know.  But I can't keep it up very long.
+I get such a stiff neck."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I've made a note of that," said John
+James.  "And your favourite dish?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Green peas."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"And may I enquire," continued John
+James suavely, "what is your favourite flower?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Orange blossom," sighed the Dove
+coyly.  "So white, so pure, so inno&mdash;&mdash;"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Yes&mdash;and what tooth-powder do you use?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Powdered gravel," she said; "it loosens
+the tongue and aids conversation."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"And what toilet soap do you most
+affect?" said the Golliwog, still writing busily.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Lick-lick, of course.  It is simply
+delightful!  I recommended it to Mr. Owl the
+other day and now he wouldn't be without
+it for worlds.  He tells me that sometimes
+when he is hungry, he simply makes a lather
+of lick-lick and bathes in it.  He finds it
+quite a tonic."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Thank you," said John James.  "We
+must let Mr. Purr-Catt know that."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Don't mention him!" exclaimed the
+Dove, ringing hastily for the Wren.  "His
+very name makes my head ache."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There was no time for further conversation,
+as the curtain was timed to rise
+in a very few minutes; so John James bade
+a hurried farewell to Miss Dove, who seemed
+quite affected at parting with such a pleasant
+fellow.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Hurrying back to Gladys and her friends
+John James had to follow behind three old
+lady Owls who wore cobwebs tied over their
+heads.  They all glanced reproachfully at
+Gladys, Tommy and Freda, and one remarked
+to the other that there seemed hardly
+room for a body to perch.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"We do seem to take up rather a lot of
+room," said Gladys, but John James only
+laughed and told her to sit as tight as she
+could or someone else might get her place.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Birds were now rapidly arriving from
+all quarters, many of them in evening dress,
+and there was a good deal of stir and flutter
+while they were arranging themselves in
+their places.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"You're on my twig!" said a shrill,
+sharp voice suddenly, and, looking round,
+our little party was confronted by an
+important looking Blue Titmouse in
+a mustard coloured waistcoat.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The children apologised in chorus, and
+moved further along the branch.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I've perched here every night since
+the Hall was opened," said the new-comer
+slightly mollified, "and it's very annoying
+indeed when other people take it.  Ah, the
+orchestra is just beginning.  I thought
+I wasn't late."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys, Tommy and Freda jail looked
+in the direction indicated, and for a few
+minutes they were unable to take their eyes
+off these truly wonderful musicians.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There were a dozen Bantam Cocks
+scraping on violins, and an equal number
+of smart Cockerels, with bulging eyes and
+puffed-out cheeks, behind as many silver
+cornets.  Then, slightly elevated, sat a row
+of fat Turkeys with crimson wattles, playing
+enormous 'cellos, and punctuating the music
+with gobble&mdash;gobble&mdash;gobbles.  Behind them
+stood a number of Peacocks, piping tunefully
+on Clarionettes.  Their tails were outspread
+and formed a brilliant background.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+At the piano sat an affected Goose, who
+appeared to be somewhat too large for the
+music stool.  She was deeply interested in
+her own reflection, which shone in the polished
+piano case, and continually arranged the
+feathers at her throat.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A Parrot with bright green plumage
+worked himself into a perfect fury, trying,
+with his trombone, to drown the sound of
+bagpipes, which were played to a great nicety
+by a Flamingo dressed in a kilt and wearing
+a tam-o'-shanter.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A very thin Stork stood upon one leg
+beating a huge drum with the other, while
+the conductor, Herr von Pelican, stood
+solemnly in front, beating time with his
+beak.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Upon all sides of the three children rose
+a murmur of bird-chatter, which they thought
+very amusing.  The bird-gossip was
+something like this:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I should like to <i>kiss</i> that sweet Cock Robin!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"She's got the loveliest dress you ever
+saw.  Green shot with&mdash;&mdash;"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Take those dirty claws off my waistcoat!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I always scream when the arrow flies&mdash;&mdash;"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"No, they haven't built a nest yet, but
+I heard the other day&mdash;&mdash;"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"If you don't stop chirping this very
+minute, I shall take you out!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Mind my cobweb, or you'll drag it
+off my head!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Have you been to the Bazaar?  I am
+told things are going for a song!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Don't say I said so, but our neighbour
+Tim Jackdaw is losing all his feathers&mdash;&mdash;"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"My dear, imagine my horror!  I went
+into the kitchen and found a policeman
+sitting at the table eating my best&mdash;&mdash;"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The children did not hear what dainty
+the policeman was devouring, for at that
+moment the curtain rose, and the performance
+began.
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br><br></p>
+
+<p><a id="chap08"></a></p>
+
+<h2>
+CHAPTER VIII.
+</h2>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  Here you meet an old friend in a different dress,<br>
+  But we think you will recognize, nevertheless,<br>
+  The story we all in our nurseries heard,<br>
+  A very old tale of a bad little bird.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br></p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+CHAPTER VIII.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+WHO KILLED COCK ROBIN.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Every member of that feathered audience
+looked with rapt attention towards the stage,
+where a Sparrow and a Robin stood facing
+each other in menacing attitudes.
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  SPARROW, fiercely:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>And so 'tis clear,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;There is no welcome for you here.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Be off!  And never yet again<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Let me behold you in this lane.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  ROBIN, cheerfully:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Ha, ha!  Ha, ha!  Tra, la, la, la!</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  SPARROW, dancing with rage:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Your senseless song enrages me!<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  ROBIN, more cheerfully:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Don't listen, friend.  Tra la, la lee!</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  SPARROW, trembling with anger:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>I'll find a way to silence that.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I will, or else I'll eat my hat!<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Such insolence I never heard&mdash;<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;You are a most outrageous bird.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I'll go, but we shall meet once more.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  ROBIN, calmly:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Had you not better go before<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Your claws wear out?  You seem excited,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Or I should now be most delighted<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;To sing to you a little ditty.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;You cannot stay?  Ah, what a pity!</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p>
+As the Sparrow turned away, he shook
+his claw at the Robin, who, perching on
+a lilac tree, began to sing:
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>I know a fellow,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Such a funny fellow,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Never knew him jolly, never yet.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;How he shrieks and chatters,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Tearing things to tatters,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I shall never nevermore forget!<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Why, a vegetable marrow<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Has more brains than Mr. Sparrow,<br>
+  And his singing!&mdash;well, I know it for a fact,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;When once to sing he tried,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;All the birdies far and wide,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Had to stuff their ears quite full<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Of the softest cotton wool,<br>
+  For his voice was like a penny whistle&mdash;cracked!</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+Just as the Robin finished his song,
+the Sparrow, armed with a bow and arrow,
+crept up behind him, muttering:
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>I'll shoot so steadily and true,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I fancy this will settle you.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+And taking careful aim, he shot at the
+Robin, who fell, quivered for a moment, then,
+attempting to rise, gasped feebly:
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>A craven's trick!  He takes to flight!<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I'll beat him yet in open fight.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+He then made a further attempt to rise,
+but fell back, while the Sparrow, disappearing,
+remarked in a low voice:
+</p>
+
+<p> class="poem"
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>'Tis done!  And no one saw the deed.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+But he was mistaken, for a Bluebottle
+had watched the whole affair from the top
+of the lilac tree, and flying down beside the
+Robin he said:
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>We'll catch him yet, for all his speed.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+A Starling, dressed as a policeman then entered.
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  BLUEBOTTLE FLY, buzzing angrily:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Ho, there!  Why, here's a nice to-do!<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A pretty constable are you!<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;An idle loon, a careless lout.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Don't loiter there.  Shout, fellow, shout!</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+The Starling immediately blew his whistle
+and other policemen rushed in, accompanied
+by quite a mob of birds.  They raised Cock
+Robin's head, and tried artificial respiration,
+but without effect.
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  FIRST STARLING:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Go, one of you for Doctor Drake,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Not for a quack&mdash;make no mistake.</i><br>
+  Voices from the mob:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>I'll go for him.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And I.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And I.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  STARLING, calling after them as they disappear:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>I saw him on the pond hard by,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;An hour ago, and talked with him<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;The while he took his morning swim.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Go there, and if you find him not,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Search underneath the pigeon cote,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And in the barn and round about&mdash;</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  Voice from the mob:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>And let his mother know he's out!</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  STARLING, brandishing his truncheon:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Be silent, sirrah, or I'll whack<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;You, on your idiotic back.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  FIRST STARLING, sorrowfully:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Somehow, 'twas always my belief<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;That yon poor bird would come to grief,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;But not with such a fearful death.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  A WREN:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>A nobler fellow ne'er drew breath.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Once on a cold December day,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I saw him give a worm away;<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A mangled worm, he could not eat&mdash;<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Such kindness it were hard to beat.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;He will be missed.  We'll never see<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Another such a bird as he.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  A RAVEN, aside:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>How queer, that now poor Rob is dead,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;These very pleasant things are said.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;'Tis strange, when only yesterday<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;He was a "wretch," a "popinjay."<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A "vicious bird," and "quarrelsome,"<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;But now&mdash;why, every mouth is dumb<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Except in praising him!</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  Aloud: <i>I see<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Good Doctor Drake comes hastily.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+The Doctor now hurried in, attired in
+a white waistcoat, and wearing a gold watch
+and chain.  He bent over Cock Robin and
+felt his pulse.
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  FIRST STARLING:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Ah, the good Doctor shakes his head!</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  DOCTOR DRAKE:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Yes, friends, the poor, dear bird is dead.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+At this point, the Sparrow rushed in,
+with eyes starting out of his head, and stooping
+over the Robin, cried in an agitated voice:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>What's this I hear?  My dear, dear friend<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Cock Robin!  Oh, is this the end<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Of all our pleasant times together?</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+Looking round at the crowd, he began to sob:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>I loved him, friends, loved every feather<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;In his dear breast.  And now&mdash;and now.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+He would have said more, but the
+Bluebottle Fly, pushing his way to the front
+of the crowd, shouted:
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>The lying traitor!  Hear me how,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I saw him with his bow and arrow<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Kill poor Cock Robin!  Treacherous Sparrow,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Your deed is known.  Seize him, my men,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And let him ne'er escape again!</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+Three Starlings at once seized the
+Sparrow and led him away.  Three other
+Starlings carried Cock Robin in a starch
+box, and they all marched off the stage
+followed by Doctor Drake, the Bluebottle
+Fly, and the mob, everyone singing dolefully
+the following dirge:
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Poor Cock Robin is surely dead.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Dead as a door nail, he.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Shot with an arrow right through the head,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Under the lilac tree.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Poor Cock Robin!  He fought us all,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Danced in his warlike glee.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;From early morn until evening fall,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Under the lilac tree.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Poor Cock Robin is dead as bone.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;King of warriors he!<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And to his name we'll raise a stone<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Under the lilac tree.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+Then the curtain fell, for the first scene
+was over.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The children each drew a long breath.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh, wasn't it lovely!" sighed Gladys.
+"I could listen all night."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Those old ladies are wiping their eyes,"
+whispered Tommy.  "Crazy old Owls!
+There's nothing to cry about."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Hush!" said Freda.  "They'll hear you."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+And evidently, one of them&mdash;a sad-looking
+Owl with spectacles&mdash;actually did,
+for she put up both claws and adjusted her
+cobweb which had got pushed to one side,
+and looking round, tried to appear as if she
+had not been weeping.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"That wicked Sparrow!" sobbed the
+young Wren, who was just behind.  "I should
+like to peck him."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"But it isn't true, you know," said
+Gladys turning round and looking at her
+solemnly.  "It is only a play, and Cock
+Robin is as much alive as you are."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I know," said the Wren, "I know it
+quite well, but I cry like this every night.
+It's my tender heart, the least little
+thing&mdash;&mdash;  Oh, here come the refreshments!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+She dried her tears very quickly, and
+beckoned to a Magpie who was carrying
+round a tray of eatables.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys felt rather pleased too, for she
+thought that she could enjoy a chocolate.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"A packet of dried flies, please," said
+the Wren quickly, holding out her claw when
+the Magpie arrived.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I want&mdash;&mdash;" began Gladys, and then
+she stopped, for she discovered that there
+was nothing on the tray but bits of groundsel,
+little dishes of bird-seed, packets of flies,
+and a few snails done up in silver paper.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"What a sell!" cried Tommy, as the
+Magpie hopped away to supply a Thrush.
+"Never mind, I've got some butter-scotch."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Where is it?" asked Freda.  "Give
+me a bit, please."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy hesitated.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It's in my pocket," he said, "but it
+won't come out.  Let's all pull together,
+and perhaps it will."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The three children tugged with all their
+might, and the butter-scotch was persuaded
+to sever its connection with Tommy's coat.
+He broke the sticky lump into three pieces,
+and they each sucked steadily.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"The curtain's going up for the second
+act," whispered the Wren, with her mouth
+full of flies.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The scene revealed was the corner of
+a wood, where stood a great oak, crowded
+on every branch with all kinds of birds,
+screaming, and chattering, and flapping their
+wings.  Suddenly there was silence as
+Mr. Justice Hawk entered, and said haughtily to
+two Starlings:
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Mind, fellows, now what you're about;<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Make haste and bring the prisoner out.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  STARLINGS, hastily dragging in the Sparrow:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;He's here my lord.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  HAWK: <i>Hum!  Ha!  'Tis well.</i><br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Now, villain, speak.  I pray you tell<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Who killed Cock Robin?</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+SPARROW, boldly, shaking his claw-cuffs:
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>I&mdash;I&mdash;I!<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;D'you want to know the reason why?<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;He stole the crumbs the children spread<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;For me and mine.  He also said<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;My voice was cracked.  He took the site<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;In yonder hawthorn blossom white,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;That I had chosen for a nest.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;He made himself a perfect pest,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Till I was weary of my life.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;He made grimaces at my wife!<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And so I shot him, and rejoice<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;That I shall never hear his voice&mdash;&mdash;</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  HAWK, interrupting him, with a horrified exclamation:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Bloodthirsty wretch!  Ah, vicious bird!<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Your wicked tale we all have heard.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And that poor Rob is truly dead,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Slain by an arrow, as you said,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;We cannot doubt.  Yet 'tis for me<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;To ask of this vast company,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Did anybody see him die?</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+The Bluebottle Fly, who was quite
+overawed by Mr. Justice Hawk, stammered
+badly, as he said:
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>I did, m-m-my lord.  With my-my-eye.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p>
+  HAWK, impatiently:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Well, what of that?  We don't suppose<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;You could have seen him with your nose.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+At this, there was loud laughter in the
+court, which was speedily suppressed, as
+Judge Hawk turned to the Sparrow again:
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>And all that now remains to do,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Is just to deal&mdash;vile wretch!&mdash;with you.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;You're sentenced to be pecked to death,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Till you shall drop for want of breath.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Starlings then released their prisoner
+who fluttered away, followed by the whole
+court, all calling and screaming and trying
+to peck him.  Presently they returned
+without him.  The Hawk resumed his seat, and
+addressed the court as follows:
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Now, gentlemen, it is for us<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Without unnecessary fuss,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;To see that our lamented friend<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Who met with such a grievous end,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Is well and honourable interred<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;As shall become a noble bird.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And since of kin he is bereft,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And has no near relations left,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Because&mdash;ahem!&mdash;He fought them all.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  Voice from the mob:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Good old Cock Robin!</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  HAWK, looking round angrily:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>I must call<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;On you for aid.  And first I ask,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Who'll be chief mourner?</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+In response to this appeal, a grey Dove
+pressed forward weeping, and said:
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>I, my lord,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I weep, sir, at the simplest word.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I'll gladly mourn for poor Cock Robin.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  HAWK, kindly:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>My dear good madam, cease your sobbing.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  THE DOVE:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>I can't, my lord.  I weep in flight,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And in the middle of the night.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Weep at a frown, or at a kiss,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Or at important times like this.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I weep in March, and weep in June,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And at the changes of the moon.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;When leaves are green, and leaves are falling.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;My laundry bill is most appalling.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And not the least of all my griefs,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I lose so many handkerchiefs.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+The Dove walked away, still sobbing,
+and the Hawk looked after her, remarking
+absently:
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Poor thing!  So pretty too!  And young!</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  A PIGEON:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Bold hussey!  With her smooth false tongue!</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  HAWK, turning to the court:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Who'll dig the grave?</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+Six Owls then marched in, carrying
+spades and trowels, and arranging themselves
+in a semi-circle, they sang in chorus,
+blinking violently to the music:
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>We will quickly dig a grave,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;For the Robin bold and brave.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Line it with the softest moss,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Strew forget-me-nots across.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Plant sweet roses o'er his head&mdash;<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Roses white, and roses red.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;All without reward or fee,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Just in loving memory.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  HAWK:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>That's settled, then.  Now, stir your stumps,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Before I get the doleful dumps.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+Exit Owls.
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+Then to the court he said:
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>But which of you will be the clerk?</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  A LARK replied:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>I will, if it's not after dark.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  HAWK:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Who'll carry Robin to his rest?</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  A KITE:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>I will.  But daylight suits me best.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  HAWK:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>That's all, I think?  Why, no!  Well, well,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I had forgot!  Who'll toll the bell?</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+Now a Bull thrust in his head from the
+back of the stage, and bellowed at the top
+of his voice:
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>I will, my lord!</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  HAWK, doubtfully:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>But can you pull?</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  BULL, looking injured:<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Now, do I look a sickly bull?<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Last time&mdash;well, just to show my power,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I dragged the bell out of the tower,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And broke the rope, and smashed the door,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Which made the mourners weep the more.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;In fact, I nearly killed them all.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;It was a splendid funeral!</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+HAWK, rising:
+  <i>Well, now we start.  I trust those Owls<br>
+  Have nimbly plied their spades and trowels.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+The curtain fell, as the procession, headed
+by the Hawk, left the stage.  But the play
+was not quite over, for almost immediately
+the curtain rose once more, revealing the
+birds standing in tableau round the Robin's
+grave, singing softly and mournfully the
+closing chorus:
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Lay him under the lilac tree,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;'Neath the twig where he loved to be.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Trilling loudly his cheery song,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Morn by morn all the winter long.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Silent now, for he takes his rest.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Poor little bird with the scarlet breast!</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Nevermore, when the sweet Spring stirs,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Will he hunt for worms in the chestnut burrs.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Nevermore will the snails hard by,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Hide away from his bold bright eye.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Hark!  How his mate calls to her dear,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Bui poor Cock Robin will never hear.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Never fashion a cosy nest&mdash;<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Poor little bird with the scarlet breast!</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+The curtain fell for the last time, and
+with a great deal of fluttering and commotion,
+the audience began to disperse.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I'm glad Spottikins didn't eat the
+Sparrow, aren't you?" said Gladys.
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br><br></p>
+
+<p><a id="chap09"></a></p>
+
+<h2>
+CHAPTER IX.
+</h2>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  They saw the streets of old Fish Town<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;So gaily decorated.<br>
+  While long for Father Neptune's car<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Among the crowd they waited.<br>
+  Rubbed shoulders 'mid the noise and fuss,<br>
+  With such a frisky Octopus!<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br></p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+CHAPTER IX.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+VISIT TO FISH TOWN.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy had gone to the fishmonger's
+shop with a message from his mother.  Some
+fine-looking Lobsters were on the marble
+slab at the door, with a large assortment of
+Oysters, Whiting and Cod, but there was no
+one at all in the shop.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy waited several minutes, making
+grimaces at the fishy smell, when all at
+once he heard a sound remarkably like
+sobbing.  He looked round and saw a large
+Cod, sitting up, crying bitterly, and trying
+to wipe his eyes with his fins.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Goodness gracious!  Whatever <i>is</i> the
+matter?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy stuck his hands in his pockets
+and looked at the sorrowful fish, who raised
+a watery eye to his face.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I can't go to the fair," said the Cod.
+"Oh, dear!  I've been caught at last, and
+now I shan't be able to go to the fair.  I've
+never missed it before, not since I was able
+to swim alone."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Hard lines," said Tommy sympathetically.
+"It isn't fair."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh, but I assure you it is," contradicted
+the Codfish eagerly.  "And a very
+special fair indeed, this time.  Father Neptune
+has consented to visit Fish Town, and my
+b-brother is going to sing at the b-banquet.
+Oh-oh-oh! and the Mayor and Corporation&mdash;"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+At this point the Cod sobbed dismally,
+and for a long time could not be persuaded
+to say any more.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Cheer up, old chap!" said Tommy;
+he could not think of anything else to say.
+"Perhaps some nice person will eat
+you&mdash;er-er-I mean&mdash;&mdash;"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Yes, yes, I understand," said the Cod,
+shaking a salt tear on to the shelf beside
+him.  "Of course they might&mdash;you never
+know.  And there might&mdash;it's just possible&mdash;be
+an account of my decease in <i>The Golliwog
+News</i>, especially as my brother is to sing at
+the banquet&mdash;you never know."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh, I say," Tommy interrupted him,
+"do you know about <i>The Golliwog News</i>?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It's the only newspaper circulating in
+Fish Town," replied the Cod, "and my second
+cousin, who was caught in a net by a&mdash;&mdash;"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I shall go to Fish Town," said Tommy
+decidedly.  "I shall go to the fair."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Then if you see my brother&mdash;&mdash;" began
+the Cod, tearfully.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Go on," said Tommy; but there was
+no answer.  The Codfish lay apparently
+lifeless among his comrades, and the fishmonger
+stood before Tommy, asking what his pleasure
+might be that fine morning.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Lobster!" said Tommy hurriedly.
+"Send it up.  And jolly well stir your
+stumps."  Then he rushed out of the shop,
+and was hurrying down the road, when just
+at the corner he met Gladys and Freda and
+John James.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Where's <i>The Golliwog News</i>?" he cried.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James took it out of his pocket.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Fish Town!" gasped Tommy, quite
+out of breath with excitement.  "I'm
+going&mdash;I mean we're all going to Fish Town.  Let
+me look at the time table."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He seized the newspaper.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Here we are!  Golliwog and Teddy
+Bear Railway.  Frogland&mdash;Kitten Town&mdash;Birdland
+City&mdash;<i>Fish Town</i>.  H'm.  There's
+a royal visit going on, and a fair, and all
+sorts of fun.  We musn't miss it.  Are you
+going, John James?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Yes," replied the Golliwog.  "They
+have this fair every year, but Father Neptune
+has never been to Fish Town before.  It is
+an important event and I hear the royal
+procession will be a sight to behold.  If we
+take the next train, we ought to get a good
+view, and I <i>might</i> be able to smuggle you
+in to the banquet."
+</p>
+
+<p class="capcenter">
+<a id="img-171"></a>
+<br>
+<img class="imgcenter" src="images/img-171.jpg" alt="&quot;'HOW DO!' HE SAID PLEASANTLY, 'FINE DOINGS HERE, TO-DAY.'&quot;">
+<br>
+&quot;'HOW DO!' HE SAID PLEASANTLY, 'FINE DOINGS<br>
+HERE, TO-DAY.'&quot;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Off they started, and their train arrived
+about half an hour late, but that was hardly
+to be wondered at in such circumstances,
+for the number of travellers bound for Fish
+Town was enormous!
+</p>
+
+<p>
+When they reached the main streets,
+the police&mdash;Mackerels dressed in blue and
+silver uniforms&mdash;were just stopping the
+vehicular traffic.  A fat, perspiring Turbot,
+in charge of a Sea Horse drawing a cart full
+of broken coral, was protesting noisily, and
+had to be led away to the Fish Town gaol.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The three children and John James
+took their stand near a large Octopus and
+some Lemon Soles.  As the latter could
+squeeze together very closely, quite a number
+were accommodated in a small space.  But
+the Octopus took up a great deal more
+than his share of room, because, every now
+and then, he persisted in stretching all his
+arms and legs at once, so naturally, there
+was a continual commotion among the Soles.
+Every few minutes a policeman came rushing
+up to see what could be the matter.  On
+one of these occasions the said policeman
+nodded to John James.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"How do?" he said pleasantly; "fine
+doings here to-day."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Very," rejoined the Golliwog; "whole
+population turned out, hasn't it?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Pretty near," said the gentleman in
+blue.  "Them Oysters ain't come yet, I don't
+believe.  Gave me half a Nep, they did, to
+wake them and get 'em out of bed in time
+to see the procession."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Ask him where the fair is," whispered Freda.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The policeman stared at her curiously,
+thinking no doubt that she was a strange
+kind of fish with which he was not acquainted?
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It's over yonder," he said, waving his
+fin; "and it starts when Father Neptune has
+gone by, and lasts till it's time for the banquet."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Fish Town is quite <i>en fête</i>," remarked
+Gladys with her most grown-up manner.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"On what?" asked the policeman.
+"It's on the job.  That's what it is.  Now
+come, sir"&mdash;addressing the Octopus sternly&mdash;"we
+can't have you stretching them arms
+of yours again, not till the show is over."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Excuse me," he said to John James,
+"I see Miss Shrimp has just fainted.  I must
+go and see about the ambulance."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I hope I shan't faint," whispered a
+stout Lady-Lobster to a very nicely dressed
+Crab.  "I think I must put up my parasol,
+I am so afraid for my complexion.  My
+dear, whenever I am exposed to heat, I go
+so red, you'd never believe."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+She produced a green parasol, and held
+it jauntily aloft, while all the fish in her
+vicinity were obliged to dodge and duck
+their heads, for fear of having their eyes
+poked out.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Presently there were loud cries: "He's coming!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Young Prawns kept darting out into
+the line of route, shouting, and pretending
+to see the procession.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Every time they shouted, the crowd
+adjusted hats and bonnets, and hoisted small
+fry on to their shoulders, but only to let them
+slide down again the next minute.  At last,
+however, just as everyone's patience was
+nearly exhausted, there was the sound of
+music in the distance.  It came nearer&mdash;nearer,
+and then a detachment of Mounted
+Plaice appeared in sight.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Oh, how excited the crowd became!
+They leapt and danced, and some of them
+dived into the drinking fountains, and out
+again.  They shouted and sang, and when
+the Mounted Plaice&mdash;looking very solemn
+and fully aware of their important position&mdash;actually
+passed by, the fish on either side
+waved fins and tails, and gave them such an
+ovation that royalty itself could ask no more.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Close upon the heels of the Mounted
+Plaice marched the band of the First
+Battalion, Lobster Fusiliers, splendidly drilled,
+wearing busbies and playing "King Neptune
+Rules the Waves."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Rule!  King Neptune!" shouted the
+Octopus, and a strange medley of voices
+took up the refrain:
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  <i>King Neptune rules the waves;<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Good fish never&mdash;never&mdash;never<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;shall be slaves.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy threw his cap in the air and
+sang at the top of his voice, as madly as any
+fish in that excited crowd, but under his
+breath he whispered:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Father Neptune is a silly old Goat.
+Everybody knows it's Britannia who rules
+the waves, and Britons who never will be
+slaves."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+By this time the members of the band
+had passed our three friends, but immediately
+after them followed a detachment of the
+same regiment headed by "Fighting
+Lobbs," the fierce and military looking
+major.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Lady Lobster with the parasol
+became greatly excited as these splendid
+looking soldiers marched past, and then
+she suddenly startled everyone by screaming
+shrilly:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Shelliback&mdash;Shelliback!  Can't you see <i>me</i>.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It's my son," she explained to anyone
+who would listen.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Shelliback!  Shelliback!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Here she made a desperate lunge with
+the parasol and knocked off the busby of
+a pompous little corporal who marched by
+the side of the last squad.  By the time he had
+rescued it, and brushed off the dust with his
+fin, Shelliback had passed on, and the little
+corporal was obliged to take to his heels and
+run to catch up with his brilliant regiment.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There was loud laughter from the crowd,
+but this was speedily suppressed as a squadron
+of Sword Fish, with drawn swords went by.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Then, very slowly and impressively,
+came Father Neptune's chariot drawn by
+sixteen magnificent Sturgeons, with bells of
+pearl upon their harness, and Sea Anemones
+behind their ears.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+On either side of Father Neptune sat
+three beautiful Mermaids, dressed in robes of
+sea-green and silver, and each of them carried a
+brush and comb in a neat little bag in case her
+hair needed attention on the way.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Father Neptune appeared to be a very
+benevolent old fellow.  He smiled and bowed
+right and left in acknowledgment of the
+cheers of the populace.  In fact he responded
+so heartily that several times his crown
+slipped over one ear, and had to be adjusted
+by the Mermaids.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The royal chariot was followed by the
+Walrus Dragoons (King Neptune's Own)
+who looked amazingly fierce, as became their
+sovereign's favourite regiment.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Mayor of Fish Town, Mr. Solomon
+Seal, accompanied by the Mayoress, occupied
+the carriage which came first after the
+Dragoons.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"There's that <i>dear</i> Mr. Seal!" cried the
+Lady Lobster very loudly.  "He will surely
+be knighted, if only because of Solomon
+Seal's Sanatorium, which he so recently
+endowed&mdash;and all with his own money."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Did you know," she continued, turning
+to the Crab, "that my precious Shelliback
+spent six months there and came out quite
+a new being?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Be quiet," replied the Crab testily.
+"You keep stepping on my sore claw, and
+your parasol is a perfect nuisance."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Aldermen and Town Councillors
+came next, with many other members of
+various offices, such as the Fish Town Bank,
+Post Office, and the Manager of the Water
+Company, a very important personage
+indeed.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Fish Town Fire Brigade now came
+in sight, their well polished helmets gleaming
+splendidly as they passed, followed by the
+Fish Societies, the first of which, the three
+children were much amused to find, from
+the banner which they bore aloft, was the
+Independent Order of Codfellows.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Now the Drum and Fife Band of the
+First Crab Guards marched past, followed
+by a second detachment of Mounted Plaice,
+who brought up the rear of this amazing
+procession.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Immediately upon their heels came a
+nondescript crew of students from the Fish
+Town University.  They had joined hands
+across the street and were singing and
+shouting "Long live old Father Nep!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+This, as may well be imagined, created
+a tremendous uproar, and all the forces of law
+and order were taxed to their utmost.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+When they had all passed, the Octopus
+gave a tremendous stretch, which sent about
+a dozen Lemon Soles, the Lady Lobster with
+her parasol, and the nicely dressed Crab,
+flying in all directions.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James and the three children
+narrowly escaped being pushed through a
+shop window, and when they had recovered
+their footing, they found themselves being
+carried along by a steady stream of fish
+which was drifting towards the Fish Town
+Mansion House.
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br><br></p>
+
+<p><a id="chap10"></a></p>
+
+<h2>
+CHAPTER X.
+</h2>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  Tells about the Fish Town fair,<br>
+  And the knighting of the Mayor.<br>
+  Tells about the banqueting,<br>
+  Where the Fish recite and sing.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br></p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+CHAPTER X.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+THE BANQUET.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I vote," said Tommy, as John James
+led them down a side street to escape the
+crowd, "that we go down to the fair.  We
+ought to have plenty of time to look round,
+and still arrive at the Mansion House in time
+to see the Mayor present the address.  Think
+what a long way the procession has to go,
+and how very slowly it travels.  Let's go,
+John James, I don't want to miss the fair."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"All right," said John James, "I don't mind."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I liked the procession very well,"
+remarked Gladys, as they hurried along
+with all the speed they could, "but I thought
+we should have seen the Sea Serpent in it.
+I'm surprised he wasn't there.  Shall we see
+him to-day, anywhere, John James?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Well," said John James, good naturedly
+"I'm not quite sure, but I fancy he has
+a shop here, somewhere in this street.  I'm
+wanting a pair of eye-glasses."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"You want eye-glasses, John James!"
+cried Gladys, bursting with laughter.  "Why,
+you will look strange!  I don't believe they
+will stop on your funny little nose."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"All editors wear eye-glasses, and I
+don't see why I shouldn't," said John James
+stolidly.  "I shall get a pair.  Hullo!  Here's
+the very place."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He stopped before a shop window full
+of spectacles, and looked in while the children
+read the sign over the door.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  PROFESSOR SEE SERPENT.<br>
+  Optician.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+"The shop won't be open to-day, will
+it?" said Tommy trying the door.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But the shop was open, so they all trooped
+in, and the Sea Serpent bustled out from
+a room at the back and stood behind the
+counter awaiting their pleasure.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He was a curious object.  He wore a
+green fancy waistcoat with yellow spots,
+and all the time they were in the shop he
+was showing his teeth in an expansive grin.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Try them on!  Try them on!" he cried,
+bringing out a tray full of spectacles and
+eye-glasses.  He fitted a pair on the
+Golliwog's nose, and John James strutted about
+the shop trying to see himself in a mirror
+which hung high above him on the wall.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Sea Serpent was so very pleasant,
+he insisted that Gladys, Tom and Freda
+should try on some spectacles as well,
+although they assured him they had no
+intention of buying any.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Never mind&mdash;never mind," said he.
+"It may lead to custom in the long run.
+I keep a large stock of goods, and should be
+pleased to supply you at any time.  You
+might take my card in case you forget the
+address."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+With a very low bow he handed them
+each a card, and Gladys murmured that she
+would recommend him to her grandfather.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Do&mdash;do," said the Sea Serpent eagerly,
+"I make grandfathers a speciality."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Have you chosen your glasses, sir?"
+he added turning to John James.  "You
+have?  Thank you."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He took them off the Golliwog's nose,
+polished them on his waistcoat, and popped
+them inside a neat little case.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Have you any grandparents, sir?"
+he enquired politely.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James tucked his newly acquired
+treasure into his pocket.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Yes," he said.  "One&mdash;grandmother&mdash;hundred
+years old this week&mdash;reads <i>Golliwog
+News</i> without glasses.  Good day, sir."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Sea Serpent hastily wriggled over
+the counter to open the door for them, and
+in bowing his adieus, he bent himself almost
+into a hoop.  Looking back, they saw him
+still winding and unwinding himself in an
+excess of politeness.
+</p>
+
+<p class="capcenter">
+<a id="img-189"></a>
+<br>
+<img class="imgcenter" src="images/img-189.jpg" alt="&quot;THE LAST ITEM ON THE PROGRAMME WAS A HUMOROUS SONG BY MR. MERRY CODFISH.&quot;">
+<br>
+&quot;THE LAST ITEM ON THE PROGRAMME WAS A HUMOROUS SONG<br>
+BY MR. MERRY CODFISH.&quot;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Silly old Goat!" said Tommy.  "Now
+let's go to the fair."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+They had no difficulty in finding the
+spot where the fair was held, but, naturally,
+they now had very little time to spare, and
+could only look round at the principal items
+of amusement.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There were several roundabouts, with
+galloping sea lions, which, with the
+swing-boats, were largely patronised by all the
+small fry.  There were shooting galleries
+where stout, middle-aged papa fishes tried
+to show their skill to admiring wives, who
+remarked at intervals:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"However <i>do</i> you do it, dad?  I never
+saw such a fish!  You hit it <i>nearly</i> every
+time.  So you do, I declare!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+They caught sight of a few side shows&mdash;which
+Tommy longed to visit&mdash;such as the
+Man-faced Fish, and the Bearded Salmon,
+but there was no time for investigating either
+of these wonders.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Our young friends did, however, stand
+for a few minutes to listen to a well-fed Pike,
+who was standing on a tub, and acting as
+a cheap Jack.  He was selling all sorts of
+articles to a crowd of silly young fish, chiefly
+Herrings and Prawns and a few Soles, who
+listened to him with their mouths wide open,
+which, perhaps, helped them to understand
+better what was being said.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Now, here," cried the Cheap Jack,
+"is a pair of scales, honestly worth half a
+Neptune.  I'll sell them for half that amount.
+Five pearls&mdash;five pearls!  Who'll buy this
+valuable pair of scales for five pearls?  You
+won't?  Then I'm sorry for you.  I really am.
+It's a genuine bargain.  You'll be sorry for
+yourselves to-morrow.  You'll say, 'I wish
+I had bought that pair of scales.'  Oh, yes,
+you will.  What's that I hear?  You
+wouldn't mind giving three pearls?  Well,
+I'll sell them for three.  Just to oblige
+a lady.  Three pearls&mdash;three pearls!  Well,
+two.  Come now&mdash;two.  You can't resist
+two.  This splendid pair of scales going for
+two&mdash;&mdash;"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Here, a portly Sole held out two pearls.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"You'll take them, madam?  Very
+good.  You have a bargain.  I ought not
+to have sold them, and that's a fact."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Pike now produced a bottle and
+a small glass.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Ladies and gentlemen," he resumed,
+making a great show of measuring a few
+drops out of a bottle and filling the glass up
+with water&mdash;"ladies and gentlemen, I have
+here a very efficacious and celebrated cough
+mixture of my own invention.  You may,
+ladies and gentlemen, have noticed a slight
+huskiness in my voice&mdash;the result of
+my&mdash;er&mdash;profession.  I will take a dose of my
+Seaweed Cough Juice, and you will no
+doubt perceive a difference."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He drank the mixture, smacked his lips
+with evident appreciation, glanced round
+at the crowd, and continued his discourse
+in a shrill staccato voice.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Does any fish within sound of my
+voice suffer with a cough&mdash;with
+huskiness&mdash;asthma&mdash;bronchial troubles&mdash;shortness of
+breath&mdash;attacks of
+indigestion&mdash;rheumatism&mdash;chilblains&mdash;sore
+fins&mdash;or loss of energy?
+Let him step up here, and try my famous
+Seaweed Cough Juice.  First dose free.
+Bottle with measuring glass&mdash;one Neptune,
+and dirt cheap at that.  Satisfaction
+guaranteed, or money refunded."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Come now," he continued.  "I can
+hear a fish coughing.  There he is!  Very
+distressing&mdash;very.  Come, sir.  Come on,
+step up here beside me.  Help him up,
+some of you.  This is going to promote
+health and prosperity in Fish Town.
+Come along, sir.  Ah, that's right," he
+remarked, as a very nervous looking
+Whiting, coughing violently, was hoisted
+to the tub.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A dose of the Seaweed Juice was
+administered.  The Whiting choked and
+spluttered, and was hurried out of the fair
+by his anxious mother.  The Cheap Jack
+immediately sold several bottles of the cough
+mixture.  Then he paused a moment before
+producing his next wonder.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I have here," he said slowly, looking
+round at the crowd, which had now increased
+considerably&mdash;"I have here, ladies and
+gentlemen"&mdash;and he hauled something out
+of a bag&mdash;"a <i>Reformed Shark</i>!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The crowd shuddered and began to edge
+further and further away.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"There is no need to fear," continued
+the Pike, unfastening a chain which was
+round the Shark's neck.  "He is a reformed
+character, and quite harmless.  He would
+make a splendid footman, and could buttle
+if required.  I will sell him for two
+Neptunes&mdash;not a fraction less."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+By degrees the crowd began to disperse
+backwards, keeping an anxious eye on the
+Shark the while.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"What, no offers?" cried the Cheap
+Jack.  "Here, I'll take one Neptune.
+This fellow can work&mdash;cook&mdash;scrub&mdash;he
+can do anything.  He could keep an
+office clean, or give assistance with
+bookkeeping.  He is in splendid condition.
+Good fins&mdash;good teeth&mdash;no trouble with
+a dentist."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Show your teeth, sirrah," he went on
+turning to the Shark.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Shark opened his mouth slowly,
+and showed his long wicked looking jaws.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"He is, as I said, a reformed character,"
+went on the Cheap Jack&mdash;but he spoke to
+empty air.  The crowd had taken to its
+heels&mdash;if fish have heels&mdash;and ran, as it
+had surely never run before.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Bit too previous for them," muttered
+the Pike, as he pushed the Shark into his
+bag, along with the cough mixture and cheap
+jewellery.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"He was a very amusing sort of person,"
+said Freda as they made a wild scamper for
+the Mansion House, for, while they listened
+to the Cheap Jack, time had flown.  However,
+in spite of their haste, they were too late to
+get a sight of the Mayor presenting Father
+Neptune with the freedom of Fish Town.
+Although they pressed forward as much as
+possible, they were still on the outskirts of
+the crowd, and could see nothing.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Presently word was passed from one to
+another that Father Neptune had asked
+one of the sword fish for a sword.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"The Mayor's kneeling on the pavement!"
+cried a Limpet, who had climbed
+a lamp-post some weeks previously, to ensure
+getting a good view.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Father Neptune has given him a smack
+across the shoulder.  He's getting up again,
+and he's Sir Solomon Seal.  Hooray!  Now
+they are all going into the Mansion House."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+As the crowd of fish gradually dispersed,
+our young friends, led by the valiant Golliwog,
+managed to gain admittance to the banqueting
+hall, where they were waved to their
+seats by a smart waiter, with a serviette folded
+over his fin.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Father Neptune looked very benevolent,
+and the newly created Knight-Mayor seemed
+beside himself with joy.  The Mayoress,
+chatting excitedly, hob-nobbed with all the
+grandees of Fish Town, alluding frequently
+to her husband as "<i>Sir</i> Solomon," and
+remarking again and again what a very happy
+day it had been.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Before all the guests were seated, Tommy,
+whose sharp ears were ever on the alert,
+heard a whispering taking place between
+Father Neptune and Sir Solomon Seal.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+As they engaged in conversation, they
+frequently glanced in the direction of the
+children and the smart little Golliwog.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Did I understand you to say <i>The
+Golliwog News</i>?" whispered Father Neptune.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"The Editor?  Dear me!  Give him
+a seat next to me, and put his companions
+directly opposite."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Before the children had quite recovered
+from their surprise, an officious looking waiter
+ushered them into the seats Father Neptune
+had indicated, and the banquet began.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Poor Gladys' face was scarlet, and she
+positively trembled when she saw her pet
+seated so close to the Sea Monarch, but John
+James himself seemed in no wise perturbed.
+He listened attentively to Father Neptune's
+suggestion that all future copies of the
+Underseas Edition of <i>The Golliwog News</i> should be
+printed on waterproof.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It shall be done, sire," he replied
+calmly, and went on sipping his soup as
+though he were in the habit of conversing
+with royalty every day in the week.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Immediately upon the conclusion of the
+luxurious banquet, Professor Walruzzio
+delighted the company by playing selections
+from the "Silvery Waves" on the grand
+piano, kindly lent by Messrs. Bleak and
+Brill.  Herr Lobster contributed a violin
+solo, after which Miss Shrimp gave a recitation
+entitled "The Lost Crab," which moved
+Father Neptune and the Lady Mayoress to
+tears.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Following this, came a very clever exhibition
+of conjuring by Professor Sea Serpent,
+whose dexterity and skill were truly remarkable,
+and Sir Solomon was heard to whisper,
+that he hadn't "the <i>faintest</i> idea how it
+was done."  And this admission from so
+distinguished a personage was a great
+surprise to everyone.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The last item on the programme was
+a humourous song by Mr. "Merry" Codfish,
+the most celebrated entertainer in Father
+Neptune's dominions.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+His favourite song, "The Funniest Fish
+in the Sea" had gained for him the title of
+"Merry" Codfish, and indeed, as he stood
+on the raised platform at the end of the
+hall, bowing affably to the audience, our
+young friends decided that never in all
+their lives had they seen a merrier fellow
+than he.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Professor Walruzzio played a little
+tinkling prelude, and Mr. "Merry" Codfish
+began.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  THE FUNNIEST FISH IN THE SEA.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  <i>One day, 'twas many years ago,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A fisherman came by,<br>
+  And threw his nice seductive line<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;To capture such as I.<br>
+  "Ha, ha!" I said and smelt the bait,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;"I fear I cannot stay,<br>
+  But not to disappoint you, sir,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I'll eat, and swim away!"</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Oh!  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I'm a very funny fish<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Such a funny finny fish,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And a funnier never could be.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I laugh and I smile,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Do gymnastics the while,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I'm the funniest fish in the sea!</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  <i>Then while I nibbled daintily,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;A Shark stole to my side.<br>
+  "What's that you're gobbling up so fast?"<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;The greedy fellow cried.<br>
+  "Kind sir," said I,&mdash;and off I slipped&mdash;-<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;"Eat heartily I pray,"<br>
+  But as I spoke, the fisherman<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Did haul his prize away.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Oh!  I'm a very funny fish<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Such a funny finny fish,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And a funnier never could be,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I left the old Shark<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;To fume in the dark,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I'm the funniest fish in the sea!</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  <i>The Shark, he is a vicious rogue,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;No friend to you and me.<br>
+  It made me laugh to see him "caught"<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;So very skilfully.<br>
+  And thus a double trick I played,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Now, wasn't it a lark?<br>
+  The fisherman had wanted Cod,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Instead, he got a Shark.</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;<i>Oh!  I'm a very funny fish<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Such a funny finny fish,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;And a funnier never could be.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;You may laugh till you choke,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;At my last little joke,&mdash;<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;I'm the funniest fish in the sea!</i><br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+All the fish applauded heartily.  To
+them it seemed an excellent joke that their
+natural enemy, the Shark, was caught on
+a line.  And also that the fisherman had
+managed to land a fish he could not possibly
+eat.  Indeed, Mr. "Merry" Codfish may be
+said to have "brought down the house."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There were loud calls for an encore,
+but the hour was growing late, and when
+they had finished flapping, at a signal from
+the Mayor, the whole company rose and
+rendered the Fishes' National Anthem, "Long
+live Father Neptune."
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br><br></p>
+
+<p><a id="chap11"></a></p>
+
+<h2>
+CHAPTER XI.
+</h2>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  How poor John James couldn't stir a peg,<br>
+  Because he had such a bone in his leg.<br>
+  But Gladys and Tommy and Freda go,<br>
+  To see the Teddio-Golliwog Show.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br></p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+CHAPTER XI.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+AT THE EXHIBITION.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I shan't be able to go," said John
+James, "and there's an end of it.  Ugh!
+It's disgusting!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"What's the matter with you?" asked
+Gladys.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Golliwog knitted up his forehead,
+slid carefully off the table, and sitting in one
+chair, put his feet in another.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It's my leg," he said at last, nearly
+twisting his nose off with the grimaces he
+made.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Well," said Gladys impatiently, "what
+about it?  I can't see anything the matter
+with it."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I've got a <i>bone</i> in it," said the Golliwog
+impressively, "and the fact is, I can't go
+to the Exhibition."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh, dear, you poor old thing!" cried
+Gladys; "couldn't Freda and Tommy and
+I go without you!  Then you could rest
+your poor leg, and perhaps the bone will
+come out."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Well," said John James rather doubtfully,
+"will you promise to remember all
+the really important things?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Of course!" said Gladys, tossing her
+head; "and I daresay if I forget anything
+Tommy and Freda&mdash;why, there they are!
+Now we can tell them about it."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Tell us what?" asked Tommy.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Why, that John James has a bone in
+his leg, and we three are to go without him
+to the Teddio-Golliwog Exhibition."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"And represent <i>The Golliwog News</i>,"
+put in John James, getting out his card case,
+and handing a card to Tommy, telling him
+at the same time to present it at the gate
+of the Exhibition, or whenever he had the
+least difficulty, and all would be well.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I want to see the knick-knacks," began
+Freda, but John James interrupted.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"You'll have to go by the G. and
+T.B. Underground.  I'll show you the way," and
+he climbed out of the window and let himself
+down by the water-shoot.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The three children followed him; they
+were not a bit afraid, and all of them alighted
+exactly in front of the black telegraph pole.
+It was zuzzing even then, and had a peculiar
+tarry smell.  John James put his ear to it and listened.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It's all right," he said.  Then he looked
+up at the wires overhead, and repeated this rhyme:
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  "<i>Little Key, Little Key.<br>
+  Won't you tumble down to me?</i>"<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+The next minute a little golden key
+with a diamond in it dropped right at their feet.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James picked it up, fitted it into
+the pole, turned it, and a tiny door flew open,
+showing a flight of iron steps inside, and a
+board slanting downwards, which said:
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  THIS WAY TO THE G.& T.B. UNDERGROUND.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+"There you are," said the Golliwog.
+"In you go.  Mind you bring back all the
+news.  Here's the Key.  Take care of it."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He flung it down the steps after them,
+banged the door, and left them to find their
+way in the dark.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"How horrid of him!" said Gladys.
+"I suppose it's the bone in his leg.  Jane
+gets it sometimes, and she's always cross
+then.  Isn't it dark?  We shall never find
+that Key."
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  "<i>Yes, you will, if you walk with care,<br>
+  It's lying now on the middle stair,</i>"<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+said a voice, a very soft gentle voice too.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Who's that?" said Gladys.  "Freda
+where are you?  Tommy, I can't see anything."
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  "<i>Oh, never fear<br>
+  For I am still here,</i>"<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+continued the soft voice:
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  "<i>And when we come to the middle stair<br>
+  I will remind you to pause just there.</i>"<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+"Thank you very much, I'm sure," said
+poor Gladys, but she really was horribly
+frightened.  She could hear Freda and
+Tommy talking and laughing below her, and
+the hand that held hers was such a very
+strange stiff hand.  The soft voice was strange
+too.  It was not only that it spoke in rhyme,
+but it shot out the words in sudden jerks,
+as if someone were pushing the speaker from
+behind.
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  "<i>The step at last,<br>
+  Hold the Key fast,</i>"<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+said the voice again.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys felt her foot grate against the
+Key, so she stooped and picked it up.
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  "<i>Here we are at the Underground,<br>
+  I hope that the Key is safe and sound,</i>"<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+said her companion.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"How she does keep on," muttered
+Gladys crossly, as she tied the Key in a
+corner of her handkerchief.  Then as they
+stepped out on to a brilliantly lighted
+platform, Gladys turned to see who it was,
+holding her so firmly by the hand.  And,
+would you believe it&mdash;the owner of the soft
+voice was a Wooden Doll?
+</p>
+
+<p>
+She had a sensible face, with a little bit
+of colour on each cheek, and a quantity of
+black hair smoothed over her ears.  She
+wore a neat little bonnet, a nicely starched
+print dress, and she carried a brown basket
+with a packet of sandwiches done up in white
+paper.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Before Gladys could speak, Tommy and
+Freda rushed up, asking where ever she had
+been.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Get into the train&mdash;get in&mdash;do get
+in!" shouted a funny little Golliwog guard,
+rushing up and waving a green flag.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He bundled the children in first, then
+popped the Wooden Doll into her basket
+with the sandwiches, and put her up in the
+rack, which was provided for light articles
+only.  Then he slammed the door, and the
+train started.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Do help that poor lady down!" began
+Gladys, but the Doll seemed quite unmoved
+by such strange treatment.  She stepped
+out of the basket, slid down the window
+curtain, and sat herself by Freda with her
+well starched skirts crackling.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+During the journey she confided to the
+children that her name was Selina Starchup,
+and that she was going to meet her husband
+at the Exhibition.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"We are going to represent <i>The Golliwog
+News</i>," said Tommy, producing John James'
+card.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Wooden Doll's rosy face went quite white.
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  "<i>I should not thus have calmly sat<br>
+  If I had even dreamed of that!</i>"<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+she gasped.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Then speaking very faintly and breathlessly,
+she told them that her husband, who
+was well acquainted with the newspaper
+world, thought <i>The Golliwog News</i> the most
+wonderful, and by far the most literary
+production in Golliwog Land.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+She added that on one occasion her
+husband had actually sat near the Editor,
+and considered it the greatest honour of his
+life that so important a personage had
+actually spoken to him, and had condescended
+to accept an acid drop.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+She was so excited that when the train
+began to slow up she could hardly wait for
+it to stop.  She hung out of the window,
+waving her basket so wildly that the neat
+little packet of sandwiches would have
+toppled out, and fallen under the train, had
+not a very fat, good-tempered looking Doll
+rushed up and caught it in both hands.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Caught out!" cried the new-comer
+joyously.  "Hullo, Selina!  Come along, my
+dear.  The Exhibition is going full swing.
+Are these young people coming with you?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The "young people" stared, for the
+wooden lady's husband was the very identical
+Fat Doll who had taken his collar off at the
+Dolls' Parliament, and said "Papa" and
+"Mamma."
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  "<i>Hush, my dear!<br>
+  Your ways are so queer,</i>"<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+said his wife reprovingly, and then she told
+him that Gladys, Tommy, and Freda had
+come to the Exhibition to represent <i>The
+Golliwog News</i>.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Fat Doll jumped off his feet, he
+was so much surprised, and when he came
+down again, he was some distance along the
+platform, where he was joined by a tall thin
+gentleman who carried a Gladstone Bag.
+These two engaged in a very earnest conversation
+for some minutes and then approached
+the children.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Allow me to shake hands," cried the
+new comer.  "You must&mdash;you really must!
+I'll take no refusal."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The little girls shook hands with him,
+but they could not help giggling.  Tommy
+burst out laughing, a real ringing schoolboy
+laugh, that made the other passengers on the
+platform look round to see what it was all
+about.  The Fat Doll seemed puzzled, for
+he began feeling round Tommy's waistcoat
+to see whether he had a string anywhere
+that could be pulled to make him laugh
+again.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He fumbled and tickled Tommy so much
+that lie literally shrieked and rolled with
+laughter.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I say&mdash;that's enough!" he cried.  "Let
+me alone.  Oh, let go!&mdash;do!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Fat Doll looked at Tommy thoughtfully.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It's not a string," he cried.  "It must
+be one of those which you press.  I suppose
+I touched the spring by accident.  It's a
+very good contrivance, any way."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+While this was going on the tall thin
+gentleman had stood by, his eyes twinkling
+with delight.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I'm out for the day," he cried merrily
+as the little party moved on.  "Business
+is very slack just now.  So I'm taking a
+holiday."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"You look as if you needed it," said
+Gladys.  "You are so very thin.  You must
+work very hard, I fancy.  What do you do
+for your living?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I'm only a poor Dustman," he answered
+jovially, swinging his bag round and round.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Nonsense!" cried the children in chorus,
+laughing heartily.  "You don't look a bit
+like a Dustman."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Are you a comic entertainer, sir?"
+asked Tommy.  "I should think you would
+be a splendid one."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"And all the children like you, don't
+they?" ventured little Freda, who had
+taken such a fancy to him that she was hanging
+on to his arm and looking up into his face.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Dustman's eyes twinkled.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Well&mdash;no," he admitted.  "I'm not
+a great favourite, though if they only knew
+it I'm a very good friend to them, and save
+them from all kinds of unpleasant things.
+It's the grown-ups who feel glad when I put
+in an appearance.  But don't let us talk
+about that, I'm out for the day, and I want
+to have a good time.  Here we are at the gate."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mr. and Mrs. Starchup had already
+passed through the turnstile.  The Dustman
+appeared to have a season ticket, for he
+simply nodded to the gate-keeper, and passed in.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy produced his press card, and the
+children were all amused to see the look of
+amazement, mingled with awe, which overspread
+the gate-keeper's face when he read
+the magic words&mdash;<i>The Golliwog News</i>.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Do you want an escort, sir?" he asked
+Tommy very politely.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh, no,&mdash;no!" cried the Dustman.  "I'll
+show them everything worth seeing before my
+business hours commence," and he hurried
+them away.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I must remember to tell John James
+how the gate-keeper stared," said Gladys as
+they went along, and the words were scarcely
+out of her mouth, before a cat, without a
+tail, came prancing along on his hind legs,
+waving something in his paw.  He had a
+tray attached to his neck by a strap,
+and went about so fast that the tray
+kept swinging round and hitting him in
+the back.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Ha'penny a packet!" he cried.  "A
+penny the half-dozen," he said, stopping in
+front of Gladys.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"What is it?" she asked, feeling for
+a halfpenny.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Memory Powder," said the cat.  "Highly
+recommended.  Sole proprietor.  Hundreds
+of unsolicited testimonials," he continued,
+thrusting a packet into Gladys' hand, and
+rushing off to meet a party of Toy Monkeys
+who had just arrived in a char-a-banc.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"My memory is so bad," began Gladys,
+"and Jane has said so often that I ought
+to get some memory powder.  I wonder&mdash;&mdash;"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+She forgot what she was going to say,
+for just then they overtook Selina and her
+husband, standing arm in arm looking at
+the Jolly-Woggle.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Jolly-Woggle was a gigantic see-saw,
+which woggled in a very peculiar way,
+and made everybody feel jolly.  The Dustman
+told the children that it was recommended
+by all the doctors in Golliwog Land as a
+splendid remedy for nervous ailments.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Going on?" cried the Fat Doll.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Rather!  What do you think?" replied
+the Dustman, and so when the see-saw
+stopped, they all climbed on, Mr. and
+Mrs. Starchup on one side, and the children and
+the Dustman on the other.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It was very amusing to watch Selina
+when the thing began to woggle.  She tried
+so hard to sit upright and look dignified, and
+to keep her basket properly balanced.  The
+Fat Doll bounced up and down like a
+Jack-in-the-Box, and several times the children
+heard faint cries of "Papa" and "Mamma"
+as they joggled to and fro.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Freda and Gladys clung to the Dustman
+like leeches, and even Tommy was glad to
+lay hold of his coat tails, the Jolly-Woggle
+did woggle so dreadfully.  But they enjoyed
+it very much, and were quite sorry when
+it came to a stand still, and they had
+to get off, because all the animals from
+a Noah's Ark were waiting impatiently to get on.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"How John James would have enjoyed
+that!" said Gladys, as they walked on.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I do wonder how the bone in his poor
+leg is getting on."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh, all right, I expect," said Tommy.
+"Aren't we going to see the Knick-Knacks?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Of course we are," said the Dustman
+and the Fat Doll both together.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Jane says she can't bear knick-knacks,"
+began Gladys doubtfully, looking up at the
+narrow building, with a perplexed expression
+on her face.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Nasty dust-traps, she calls them.  Do
+you think we ought to go?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Bother Jane!" said Tommy.  "Of
+course we're going."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He opened the glass door, and the Dustman,
+with Freda still clinging to his arm,
+went in.  Gladys followed, then the Fat
+Doll and his wife, who nearly got squeezed
+to death trying to walk in arm in arm, and
+last of all, Tommy himself entered.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Each knick-knack was in a separate
+room with its name over the entrance.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The first was:
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  A STITCH IN TIME.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+"I've heard that before," said Gladys.
+"I think it was Jane who said it.  I don't
+want to see it very much."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Nonsense!" said Tommy.  "No one
+can make you do any mending to-day.  Look!
+There's someone who ought to go in," he
+added, pointing to a very ragged Doll.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"She is going in," said the Dustman,
+and so they all trooped behind her.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In the middle of the floor there was an
+arm-chair, and Father Time sat in it.  They
+knew who he was, because he held an hour
+glass in one hand and a scythe in the other,
+and looked so very old.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The old fellow smiled and nodded to the
+Dustman, and asked him to give the hourglass
+a shake on the quiet, for the sand seemed
+running very slowly, and he wanted his
+dinner.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Of course, the Dustman contrived to do
+as he was asked, and no one but the children
+saw him, for the Fat Doll and Selina were
+examining the scythe, and the Ragged Dollie
+was calling for a needle at the top of her
+voice.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Presently a neat little Teddy in a white
+apron and a cap brought her a needle
+threaded with black cotton, and she then
+walked up to Father Time and put a large
+stitch in his waistcoat.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"What is she doing that for?" whispered
+Gladys to Selina.
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  "<i>Just look again<br>
+  And all will be plain,</i>"<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+whispered back the Wooden Doll.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The stitches flew in and out on Father
+Time's coat, and as if by magic, for every
+stitch she made, nine neat little stitches
+appeared in her own ragged garments.  In
+a very short time she began to look quite
+a Smart Doll, very different from the
+disreputable creature she had seemed on first
+entering the place.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+She smiled amiably at the children,
+but they did not like her, for as she was
+going out she made a grimace at the
+Dustman, who only shook his bag at her,
+and grinned.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Father Time was getting irritable.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I can hear the rattling of the plates,"
+he said.  "I want my dinner."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The children left hastily, in search of
+the next Knick-Knack, which was an ancient
+instrument known as:
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  THE SECOND FIDDLE.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+It was kept on a white satin cushion,
+and covered with a glass case, and the Toy
+Elephant in charge of it told them it was
+the greatest curiosity at the Exhibition.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"But why?" asked Tommy.  "It looks
+quite ordinary to me, only rather old and fusty."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It is so exceedingly wonderful," said
+the Elephant, slowly and patiently, looking
+at Tommy over the top of his spectacles,
+"because no one has ever been able to play
+it."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Has anyone ever tried?" asked the
+Fat Doll, nudging Tommy in the ribs, hoping
+to make him laugh.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Of <i>course</i> not!" replied the Elephant
+indignantly, polishing up the glass case with
+a chamois leather.  "I guard it, sir, most
+vigilantly all day, and at night I sleep with
+it locked up in my trunk.  And <i>no one</i>, sir,
+ever <i>will</i> be able to play it!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy laughed loudly, which was what
+the Fat Doll wanted.  Freda and the Dustman
+laughed too, and even Selina giggled
+in a perfectly lady-like manner, but Gladys
+did not smile.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I remember Jane once said&mdash;&mdash;" she
+began, but Tommy turned round and looked
+at her.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Look here, Gladys, why on earth
+must you remember every disagreeable thing
+your Jane ever said?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I'm sure I don't know," she replied,
+"I'm generally so forgetful, too."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Why it's the memory powder!" cried
+the Dustman.  "We ought not to have let
+her buy it."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Give it to me," said Tommy, and
+seizing the packet he went to a window and
+threw it out as far as he could.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The children then passed on to the next
+room over which they saw the mysterious
+words:
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  THE LITTLE PITCHERS.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+These Little Pitchers stood in a row
+against the wall.  They were ten in number,
+and their ears were very long; but in spite
+of this, a cross-faced Golliwog was walking
+round them, pulling their ears to make them
+grow longer still.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Doesn't it hurt?" said Gladys, to
+the smallest of the Little Pitchers.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Hurt?" replied the poor little thing.
+"Rather!  I should just think it does."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"But how did your ears get long to
+start with?" asked Tommy curiously.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Well"&mdash;the Little Pitcher looked
+rather ashamed&mdash;"I used to listen about
+at doors, when grown-up people were talking,
+and er&mdash;er&mdash;my ears began to grow, and they
+have been getting longer ever since.  It's
+awful.  I can hear the flies walking about
+on the ceiling.  The smallest sound seems
+like thunder.  That bluebottle fly on the
+wall over there, can't you hear him?  He's
+stamping along, like&mdash;Old Boots!&mdash;Oh, there he is!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Little Pitcher shut his eyes, and
+put a tea cosy over both ears and would not
+speak any more.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The children looked round to see what
+could have upset him, and they saw coming
+towards them on tiptoe the strangest little
+old person you ever imagined.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"My name is Boots," he remarked in
+a thin piping voice, "and I am usually known
+as Old Boots."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Are you a real person?" asked Freda.
+"Dad often says he has been working like
+Old Boots.  Was that you?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It was," said the old gentleman looking
+very pleased with himself.  "Some people
+fight like Old Boots, or hurry like Old
+Boots&mdash;&mdash;"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Or <i>squeak</i> like Old Boots," added the
+Dustman slyly, and at this our merry little
+party laughed again, and the Fat Doll turned
+a somersault.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But the old man went off offended,
+piping to himself, like&mdash;just like Old Boots!
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Now," said the Dustman, picking up
+his Gladstone Bag.  It's six o'clock.  I have
+just one hour left before I start business
+again, so we'd better all go and have some
+tea, and then we might have a look round
+the Magic Corridor."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Off they went to a celebrated tea house
+called "The Lions' Share."  It was kept
+by a large family of Toy Lions.  They were
+very obliging creatures, and if you wanted
+anything, and could not catch the waiter's
+eye, all you had to do was to pull his tail,
+and he brought you whatever you happened
+to fancy.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tea being over&mdash;and a very merry meal
+it was&mdash;our friends went to the Magic
+Corridor, where they found a most fascinating
+automatic machine.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+All you did&mdash;as the Dustman explained&mdash;was
+to peep in, turn the handle, and think
+of an absent friend, when immediately you
+saw in the machine an animated picture,
+which told you what the friend was doing
+at that precise moment.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I should like to look in first," said
+Gladys, "because I do so badly want to
+know what John James is doing, and how
+the bone in his leg is getting on."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+And seizing the handle, she peered
+through the glass.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Can you see him?" asked Freda.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Ye-es," said Gladys after a pause;
+then she added: "He is writing at the
+nursery table.  He seems to have a huge
+pile of letters beside him.  What can he be
+doing?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh, now he has finished them, and is
+stretching his back.  Poor old thing!  I
+expect it aches.  Ah, now he is sticking
+down the envelopes.  Oh, my!  What a
+pile!  And now, if he isn't even running
+to the pillar box.  Running ever so
+fast&mdash;&mdash;"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys turned the handle very quickly.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"And he told me he had a bone in his
+leg!  It must have been a story.  Oh, dear!
+Oh, dear!  I shall go home this very minute
+and see&mdash;&mdash;"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+She dropped the handle, and ran down
+the Magic Corridor, with Tommy and Freda
+at her heels.  On&mdash;on&mdash;till they reached the
+G. &amp; T.B. Underground.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Well, I must be off," said the Dustman,
+shouldering his Gladstone Bag, and he too
+hurried away.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Look!" said the Fat Doll, as he and
+his thin wife walked leisurely down the
+Corridor.  "The little lady has dropped
+something."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The "something" was a handkerchief.
+He picked it up, and was putting it in his
+pocket when a small round object fell out,
+with a slight clatter.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It was the Magic Key!
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br><br></p>
+
+<p><a id="chap12"></a></p>
+
+<h2>
+CHAPTER XII
+</h2>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  The most illustrious G.N.<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Now gives a Christmas party.<br>
+  We meet our merry friends again<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;With smiles and handshakes hearty.<br>
+  But, oh! their faces were so glum<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;When the last guest of all had come!<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br></p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+CHAPTER XII.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+THE CHRISTMAS PARTY.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Now, what I want to know is," said
+Gladys, looking very earnestly at John James,
+"what did you find to do while we were at
+the Exhibition?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I was very busy," said the Golliwog.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Yes, I daresay," Gladys frowned, and
+tapped impatiently on the table, "but what
+were you doing?
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I suppose I shall have to tell you,"
+said John James, "you're such a one for
+finding out things.  I'm going&mdash;I mean <i>The
+Golliwog News</i> is going&mdash;to have a Christmas
+party."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh, John James, are you really?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys' eyes sparkled, as she jumped
+up and ran to him.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"And were you sending out&mdash;I mean&mdash;would
+you like me to write the invitations
+for you?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"No, thanks.  I've sent them.  The
+special ones, that is.  I've issued a general
+invitation to all our readers."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Oh-oh!  But <i>The Golliwog News</i> has
+such a <i>tremendous</i> circulation," said Gladys
+doubtfully.  "Selina said so.  You'll never
+find room for everybody."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Yes, we shall."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+And for once, John James forgot his
+dignity, and seizing Gladys' hand he waltzed
+her round the table, shouting:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"The more the merrier!  <i>The Golliwog
+News</i> for ever!  Hooray&mdash;hooray!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Goodness!  What a noise!" cried
+Tommy, bursting into the nursery.  "Gladys
+and John James have gone mad!" he
+exclaimed loudly to Freda who followed close
+behind him.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+For a moment the two children stood
+aghast upon the threshold, then the
+impromptu waltz came to an abrupt finish.
+Gladys rushed to welcome her friends and
+told them the astounding news.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"John James is going to have a
+Christmas party."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Scrumptious!" said Tommy.  "Who's
+coming?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"All the readers of <i>The Golliwog News</i>."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"That's us, then," remarked Thomas
+cheerfully, and he plied John James with
+questions, till the Golliwog stopped his
+ears and would say nothing but "Wait
+and see."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Will Mr. Merry Codfish come?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Wait and see."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Have you asked Father Neptune?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Wait and see."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Is Cock Robin coming&mdash;and Peter
+Bunney&mdash;and Thomas Purr-Catt&mdash;and Sir
+Solomon Seal?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"<i>Wait and see!</i>" roared John James.
+"They're all invited, but we shan't know
+till they arrive whether they are coming or
+not."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Let him alone, Tommy," said Gladys,
+"or perhaps he won't let us three come.
+I shall wear my best frock.  What shall you
+wear, Freda?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"My Bo-Peep dress," said Freda, and
+then the children began an animated
+conversation on what proved to be an
+inexhaustible subject, and lasted till the very
+day of the party.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+On that auspicious afternoon, which
+was also Christmas Eve, John James had
+brushed his unruly hair till it stood bolt
+upright.  With his eye-glasses set on the
+extreme end of his funny little nose, he looked
+a very important person indeed as he waited
+at the nursery door to receive his guests.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Carlo and Spottikins were deputed to
+open the front door and show the arrivals
+upstairs between them.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Peter Bunney was the first to arrive, with
+his ear trumpet in a green baize bag.  Spottikins
+and Carlo both accompanied him upstairs
+as neither of them could decide to stay below,
+in case they lost any of the fun.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Mr. Peter&mdash;" said Carlo.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"&mdash;Bunney!" added Spottikins quickly,
+and in tumbled Peter, knocking John James'
+eye-glasses clean off his nose, as he swung
+his bag over his shoulder.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Came early!" he gasped, "so as not
+to miss anybody.  Plush-Mole's coming by
+the Underground.  Too slow for me.  That's
+my ear trumpet," he added, indicating the
+green bag.  "I thought it might be taken
+for a musical instrument, and it was!  I
+heard a passenger on the G. &amp; T.B.R. say:
+'My deah!  It's Professor Rabizzio.  Ha! ha! ha!'"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Good joke!" cried Tommy, shaking
+with laughter as he took the trumpet out of
+the bag.  "Very good joke."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Choke?&mdash;did you say choke?" cried
+Peter excitedly.  "Pat him on the back!
+Quick!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He snatched the trumpet out of Tommy's
+hand and was beginning to pummel him
+with it, when Sir Solomon and Lady Seal
+arrived.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Pray come in," said John James
+stepping forward to welcome them.  Lady
+Seal smiled graciously, and sat down beside
+Tommy.  Her brown satin dress brushed
+against his coat and gave him the shivers,
+so he afterwards declared.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mr. William Dogg, M.P., and Mr. Henry
+Toad, M.P., arrived arm in arm.  Close on
+their heels Professor Sea Serpent came in
+very briskly, carrying a large valise full of
+eye-glasses, which he hastily distributed among
+the guests, explaining that he thought this
+was an opportunity not to be lost, as it
+might lead to business some day.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Now Cock Robin hopped up the stairs,
+and tripping over Sir Solomon's tail, entered
+the nursery with great <i>éclat</i>.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Is the Dove coming?" whispered
+Freda, to the smart little bird.  "Oh, I hope
+so."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Yes, if she can get dressed," returned
+the Robin.  "She wanted to come in my
+motor, but I couldn't wait while she fixed
+her last feather.  She's just behind."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+And this proved to be the case, for the
+next minute she came in with the Sparrow,
+who absolutely refused to let Carlo take his
+cane or his bowler hat.  He preferred, he said,
+to look after them himself.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mortimer Max and Jolly Jack were
+heard to say that they should like to turn
+the bounder out, but just then the Keeper
+of the Money Box came in, and they forgot
+the fussy little Sparrow.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The K.M.B. was a cheerful looking
+Golliwog, and he had the Money Box under
+his arm.  Not that there was anything in
+it&mdash;he carefully explained&mdash;but it would be
+such a dreadful thing if it happened to get
+lost, because, of course, if there were no
+Money Box to Keep, he would be bound
+to lose his job.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Quite a troop of guests arrived now.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James grew rosy with excitement,
+and the children rushed to and fro, talking
+to the extremely funny folk, who seemed
+bent on wishing themselves and everybody
+else "A Merry Christmas."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Father Neptune, Mr. Merry Codfish,
+Mr. Thomas Purr-Catt, M.P., and a melancholy
+Billikins, all arrived together, and
+were suitably received by John James.  After
+that there was a terrific noise below, then
+a sound as if a small army was marching
+up the stairs.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"What can it be?" cried Lady Seal
+nervously, taking out a bottle of Eau de
+Cologne and dabbing her face with it.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Not robbers, I hope!" said Father
+Neptune jovially, beaming on everyone as
+he spoke.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The stampede came nearer.  Suddenly
+music struck up, and then the Frogland
+Brass Band came marching in, playing
+"Land of Bogs and Marshes."  They
+arranged themselves near the fireplace,
+where Mr. Henry Toad, with his thumbs
+stuck in his waistcoat pockets, was having
+a heated argument with Mr. Thomas
+Purr-Catt.
+</p>
+
+<p class="capcenter">
+<a id="img-239"></a>
+<br>
+<img class="imgcenter" src="images/img-239.jpg" alt="&quot;THERE NEVER WAS SUCH A CHRISTMAS PARTY BEFORE NOR SINCE.&quot;">
+<br>
+&quot;THERE NEVER WAS SUCH A CHRISTMAS PARTY BEFORE NOR SINCE.&quot;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"My dear, sir, what the working frog
+really wants, is&mdash;&mdash;"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The rest of the sentence was lost, for
+the guests were still arriving in droves, and
+John James now suggested a game of
+musical chairs to fill in time till everybody
+had come.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Frogland Brass Band kindly obliged
+with a spirited rendering of "The Sea-Shells
+of Fish Town."  The last traces of shyness
+very quickly vanished, and the guests leaped
+and danced, and hopped and flopped round
+the chairs with alarming velocity.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The game proceeded in the usual way,
+until only Lady Seal and Tommy were left
+marching round the last chair.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Tommy had rather enjoyed the game,
+but Lady Seal was so very fat, that when
+the music suddenly stopped, she lost her
+balance, tried to recover herself by clutching
+at Tommy's jacket, and finally fell sprawling,
+with Tommy and the chair on the top of
+her.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Sir Solomon was laughing so much at
+his wife's exploits that he could scarcely help
+her to rise.  When, however, she was comfortably
+settled in a corner of the sofa, and the
+Dove had lent her a bottle of smelling salts,
+John James asked Professor Sea Serpent
+if he would favour the company with a few
+conjuring tricks.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+This request was loudly applauded, and
+though, at first, the Professor protested that
+he had forgotten&mdash;absolutely forgotten&mdash;all
+the tricks he ever knew, he was presently
+prevailed upon to take up his stand at one
+end of the nursery, with a small table in
+front of him.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Bowing very low, he first asked whether
+any gentleman had brought such a thing
+as an ear trumpet.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Yes," said the Sparrow officiously,
+and without so much as saying "By your
+leave," he seized Peter Bunney's trumpet
+and handed it up to the conjuror.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"And now," proceeded Professor Sea
+Serpent, "will any gentleman lend me a
+bowler hat?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Here!  Here!" cried Peter, taking the
+Sparrow's hat out of his claw before anyone
+could speak.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Here's a hat!  Here's a hat!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He glared at the Sparrow, and the
+Sparrow glared back at him.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Professor then asked John James
+if he could be accommodated with a screen,
+and the ingenious Golliwog, assisted by
+Tommy, fixed up a clothes horse and threw
+the nursery tablecloth over it.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Sea Serpent now borrowed Lady
+Seal's handkerchief, and much to her dismay
+he tore it into little bits and put it in the
+trumpet.  This he carefully placed under
+the hat, and invited Mr. Sparrow to step
+up and assist him with the trick.  That
+gentleman showed great reluctance, but he
+was pushed forward by Mr. Peter Bunney,
+and finally consented to hide himself behind
+the screen.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The conjuror removed the hat and
+picked up the trumpet.  He held it aloft
+for a moment, whistled into it, gave it a
+little shake, and out fluttered Mr. Sparrow
+with Lady Seal's handkerchief safe and
+sound in his beak.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+How the audience cheered and stamped,
+while the Professor bowed himself into hoops!
+When the clamour had subsided, he said
+he would just do one more trick, and borrowing
+Mr. Thomas Purr-Catt's eye-glass, he
+suggested that this time Mr. Peter Bunney
+should be his assistant.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Peter did not want to go, but the Sparrow
+and several others near by entered into the
+spirit of the joke and pushed him behind
+the screen.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Professor Sea Serpent held up the
+borrowed eyeglass to the full view of his
+audience, then with a sudden swish of his
+tail, which made everybody jump, he smashed
+it into little bits, and put the fragments
+into Mr. Sparrow's hat.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mr. Purr-Catt tried to appear unconcerned,
+but Gladys noticed that his tail
+was swinging furiously.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Professor waved the hat to and fro,
+covered it with a black cloth, repeated some
+magic words, and lo and behold, Mr. Peter
+Bunney popped out of the hat with the
+eyeglass, well polished and with a new
+chain on it, in his eye!
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Thomas purred with satisfaction when
+he got it back safely, and the company
+laughed and clapped till they were tired.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mr. Bunney wiped his trumpet very
+carefully, and put it back in the bag, saying
+he was afraid he should never be able to use
+it again; and Mr. Sparrow asked Father
+Neptune in a loud whisper, whether he knew
+of a really good disinfectant because if not
+he should have to join the hatless brigade.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+John James now asked Mr. Merry Codfish
+to sing, and immediately all the guests
+clamoured for "The Funniest Fish in the
+Sea."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mr. Codfish, who had been sucking a
+voice jujube all the evening, now removed
+it, and stood upon the Money Box.  Then
+bowing very gracefully, he sang his favourite
+song in his best style.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Just as the applause was dying down,
+and everyone was feeling very merry, there
+was a sort of shuffle outside the door, and
+Carlo announced "Mr. Hairy Octopus."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He was the very Octopus who <i>would</i>
+stretch himself when the procession at Fish
+Town was going by.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+To-day, however, he appeared to be
+very much subdued, for he kept his arms
+close to his sides, replied to John James'
+greeting in a hoarse whisper, and sat down
+on the ear trumpet.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Freda helped him up again, and found
+him a hassock to sit upon, and he was so
+very grateful that she asked him whether
+he happened to have seen the Dustman
+anywhere.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Octopus had perched himself on
+the very edge of the hassock, and he shuffled
+nervously as he replied:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I?  No.  Not at all.  He won't surely
+be here yet."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Lady Seal giggled:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Poor fellow!" she whispered.  "How
+nervous he is.  But then, he's all arms and
+legs."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I hope the Dustman is coming," repeated
+Freda loudly.  "He is such a very
+delightful person."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Octopus stared at her.  Then he
+chuckled as if she had said something funny.
+Before she could ask what it was, John James
+held up his hand.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Hark!" he said.  "I can hear something."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He rushed to the window, threw it open
+and leaned out.  It was a fine starry night,
+clear and cold, and a curious whirr-whirr
+could be distinctly heard.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Everyone who could find room followed
+John James' example, and hung out of the
+window to see what it was.  Gladys and
+Father Neptune were in the front row, while
+Freda and the Octopus pressed close behind
+them.  Thomas Purr-Catt, Peter Bunney, and
+Mr. Merry Codfish craned their necks to
+the utmost, but poor Tommy who had
+Lady Seal clinging to his arm brought
+up the rear, and could not see anything
+at all.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The whirr came nearer.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Ah!" cried John James suddenly, for
+a twinkling light like a moving star was
+gradually descending, and in a few minutes
+the eager crowd of excited folk could plainly
+see that an aeroplane was rapidly approaching.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Nearer and nearer it came, until they
+could see that the shape of it was something
+like a huge sleigh, with carved heads of
+reindeer upon the propellers, and standing in
+the midst of it was an old, old man with
+flowing garments and a long white beard.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Father Christmas!" shrieked Freda
+and Gladys together.  "Oh, it is!  It is!
+Father Christmas himself!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A shout went up from all the guests,
+a mighty cheer, ringing out into the still
+frosty air, "Father Christmas!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Then the aeroplane descended, Father
+Christmas anchored it to the window sill,
+and a host of eager hands were outstretched
+to pull him in.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There was still another surprise in store.
+Father Neptune had been keenly interested
+in the proceedings, and suddenly he startled
+everybody by shouting at the very top of his
+voice:
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Welcome, Brother Christmas!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Dear me!  Dear me!" cried Father
+Christmas.  "So it is!  My long lost&mdash;but
+never forgotten&mdash;Brother Neptune."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+And the two old men fell on each other's
+necks and executed a sort of two-step.  It
+was so many, many years since they had met!
+</p>
+
+<p>
+All this time a loud commotion had been
+going on outside.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Bless my heart!" said Father Christmas,
+turning to John James.  "You really
+must forgive me, sir.  I quite forgot it.
+I have a party of your guests with me, and
+they can't get out.  Ha! ha!  I was starting
+on my usual rounds, and offered them a free
+passage.  Never travelled by air in their
+lives before.  Locked 'em in my sack, or
+some of 'em would have been jumping
+overboard.  Will somebody lift my sack in?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Of course everyone ran to the window
+again, and here the Octopus was really
+useful, for he wrapped his arms and legs
+round the bulky thing, and dragged it in
+by main force.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The din was horrible.  Such a shrieking
+and calling from the Toys locked in the bag,
+while Father Christmas fumbled in all his
+pockets.  He drew out pieces of string, nails,
+five glass marbles, a knife with a corkscrew
+in it, half an apple and a piece of orange
+peel&mdash;because he was still a boy at heart&mdash;but no key!
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I must have lost it," he said at last.
+"And it's a very special lock.  It can't be
+forced.  What are we going to do?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The whole party crowded round the
+sack, and such a hub-hub took place that
+Father Neptune stopped up his ears, and
+Sir Solomon called "Order!  Order!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+No one seemed aware that two more
+guests had just come.  It was Gladys who
+first saw them.  Selina Starchup and her
+husband were standing before her, and the
+Fat Doll held out a tiny embroidered
+handkerchief.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"You dropped it at the Exhibition," he said.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Thank you," said Gladys, and as she
+took it, she felt a small hard substance in
+the corner.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In an instant she knew what it was.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"John James!" she called across the
+room.  "John James, here's the Magic Key!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Hurrah!  Hurrah!" shouted the Golliwog.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Hip-hip-Hooray!" cried the hilarious
+guests.  "The Magic Key will open any lock."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Quick as thought, Father Christmas
+fitted it into the lock, and out popped a
+Teddy Bear, then a Golliwog, followed by
+a crowd of Dolls, ever so many Toy Monkeys,
+an Elephant, a fat Camel eating dates, and
+a Jack-in-the-Box.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Then there was a chorus of <i>How-do-you-do's</i>
+and <i>Pleased-to-meet-you's</i>!
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Fat Doll pirouetted round the
+room, while Selina clung to her husband's
+coat tails, trying vainly to subdue his high
+spirits.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Let me go!" he cried.  "Let me
+go my dear!  I'm out at a party.  A real
+Christmas party, and no mistake!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"I can't stop long," remarked Father
+Christmas, "I've got a lot to do to-night.
+Don't mention the word Stocking to me,
+or I shall be off like a shot."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Christmas seems to be a busy time
+to so many people," whispered Freda to
+Gladys.  "You see, that dear Dustman hasn't
+come after all."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Hush!" said Gladys.  "Listen to John James."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"You must really stay to supper," the
+Editor was telling Father Christmas.  Then
+he rang the bell, and when Carlo appeared,
+he requested that supper should be served
+immediately.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"It's ready now, sir," said Carlo,
+polishing a spoon on the front of his
+waistcoat.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+So everybody trooped into the next
+room where a long table was set out with
+every kind of appetising fare.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A huge Christmas Tree, hung with lighted
+candles, was in the middle of the room, and
+from the top of the Tree trailed a red and
+white streamer, bearing across it in large
+letters the familiar words:
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  THE GOLLIWOG NEWS.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<p>
+Father Neptune and Father Christmas
+sat side by side.  John James occupied the
+head of the table with Gladys on his right
+hand and Lady Seal on his left, and the
+other guests arranged themselves as they
+liked.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There never was such a Christmas party
+before nor since.  Crackers were pulled, jokes
+were cracked.  Father Neptune related a
+long rambling story about a young Periwinkle
+he had once known, and Father Christmas
+capped it with another, about a careless
+Comet who lost his tail.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+When full justice had been done to the
+costly viands, and the pleasant meal drew
+to a close, Father Neptune rose and proposed
+a toast&mdash;"<i>Success to the Golliwog News</i>,"
+which was heartily received, and drunk by
+all present, in salt water or fresh, according
+to personal taste.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Then John James rose to reply.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It was a curious scene.  The light from
+the hundreds of candles flared upon the
+eager faces of the guests as they turned
+towards the talented and gifted Editor.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Beloved friends and supporters of
+<i>The Golliwog News</i>&mdash;&mdash;"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He paused, for the door was suddenly
+thrown open, and a tall, thin individual
+carrying a Gladstone Bag, came in.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"The <i>dear</i> Dustman!" cried Freda,
+jumping up to welcome him.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But consternation was written upon the
+faces of the guests.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"Not yet!  Not yet!" they cried in chorus.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"We aren't nearly ready for you yet!"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+For answer, the Dustman began to
+extinguish the candles.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Dimmer and Dimmer grew the room,
+until only the light of the last candle flickered
+on the merry face of Father Christmas.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Then the Dustman put it out.
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br></p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+THE END.
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br></p>
+
+<p class="t4">
+  GIBBS AND SONS, 42 & 43 PALACE STREET,<br>
+  CANTERBURY.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br><br></p>
+
+<p><a id="chap13"></a></p>
+
+<p class="t3b">
+SPECIAL EDITION.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t2">
+The Golliwog News
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Circulating in Toy-Town-on-Sea, Dolls House
+City, Kitten Town, Poodleton, Birdland City
+and Fish Town.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+SPECIAL SUPPLEMENT.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Messrs. S. W. Partridge and Co., Old Bailey, London, E.C.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+LOST.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+LOST&mdash;The Magic Key, in
+the grounds of the
+Teddio-Golliwog Exhibition.  Finder
+returning same to Miss Gladys
+will be rewarded.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+LOST&mdash;By the Chief Mermaid
+in the procession at Fish
+Town, a very valuable brush
+and comb.  Finder will be
+suitably recompensed.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+FATHER TIME offers to add
+fifty years to the age of
+any person giving information
+that will lead to the capture of
+the thief who stole his hour glass
+while he was having dinner at
+the Exhibition.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+MISCELLANEOUS.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+VISITORS to Toy Town-on-Sea
+can get good teas and
+dinners at the Hotel Golliwog,
+near the Sea Front.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+SECOND Edition.&mdash;"The
+Needs of the Working
+Frog," by Henry Toad, Esq.,
+M.P.&mdash;Copies on application to
+the Author, 67, Marshgate, Frogland.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+MUSICAL.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+MR. BARKER PUPP teaches
+Singing and Voice Production
+by entirely new methods;
+visits and bites pupils.  Moonlight
+sonatas in three lessons.&mdash;153,
+Growl Lane, Poodleton.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+MR. MERRY CODFISH, the
+efficient finny entertainer
+is open to accept a limited number
+of engagements for parties,
+etc.&mdash;Apply, 16, Mackeral Row,
+Scaly Plaice, Fish Town.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+COPIES of all Songs sung by
+Mr. Merry Codfish and
+Mr. Barker Pupp can be obtained
+at Messrs. Bleak and Brill's
+Music Stores, Fish Town.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+FROGLAND Brass Band
+comprising forty members
+has a few dates vacant for select
+parties.&mdash;Apply, Bandmaster,
+Frogland.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p><p class="t3">
+ARTICLES WANTED.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+WANTED to Purchase
+cheaply, a Second-hand
+Watering Can.&mdash;Write, in first
+instance, "Poor Papa," Office
+of this Paper.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+BUSINESSES, PARTNERSHIPS, ETC.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+MILK Business for Sale&mdash;Good
+reason for selling (no
+customers)&mdash;Apply, Mrs. Catt,
+Mew Road, Kitten Town.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+PARTNERSHIP.&mdash;Teddy Bear
+capitalist wanted with 5d.,
+to join another in putting on the
+market a novelty which will sell
+at sight.&mdash;Box 464, Golliwog
+News.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+PERSONAL.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+WILL the pretty Polliwog in
+picture hat who sat next to
+Teddy Bear at the Dolls Opera
+House last night please write to
+T.B., c/o Golliwog News.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+WILL any eye witnesses who
+saw large Octopus pushing
+Lemon Soles through plate glass
+window after the Royal procession
+at Fish Town, kindly
+communicate with Messrs. Shark and
+Shark, Solicitors, Fish Town.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+WANTED to borrow 2d. by
+business Billikins in financial
+difficulties; good security
+given, in confidence.&mdash;Box 1229,
+Golliwog News.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+APARTMENTS.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+TOY Town-on-Sea.&mdash;Comfortable
+Apartments, five
+minutes from Railway Station,
+close to sea; tide washes kitchen
+windows twice daily.&mdash;Terms,
+Stamp, "Sea View."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+LODGINGS to Let for two
+respectable Teddies, who
+would be willing to share the
+same cup and saucer; every
+comfort.&mdash;Box 3764, Golliwog
+News.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+ARTICLES FOR SALE.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+EAR TRUMPET for disposal,
+owner having no further
+use for same; would exchange
+for all old numbers of the
+Golliwog News.&mdash;Apply, P.B. "The
+Burrows."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+GENT'S HAT for Sale, good
+as new.  Apply, personally,
+to Mr. Sparrow, Hall-in-the-Wood,
+Birdland City.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+SITUATIONS VACANT.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+PLAIN Pollywog Cook wanted,
+the plainer the better; no
+windows, no boots, no knives,
+no washing, no followers, no day
+out, no wages.&mdash;Apply, Mrs. Jolly
+Jack, "The Nest," Dolls
+House City.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+ENERGETIC Teddy (just
+leaving school) wanted as
+Office Boy, must keep face clean.
+Apply, W. P. Mole, 16, High
+Street, Dolls House City.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+SITUATIONS WANTED.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+REFORMED Shark seeks
+post as Footman, speaks
+good English; could buttle if
+required.&mdash;Write, R.S.,
+Golliwog News Office.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  CAN YOU<br>
+  READ<br>
+  THIS?<br>
+  If not, consult:<br>
+  PROFESSOR SEE SERPENT,<br>
+  EYE SPECIALIST.<br>
+  No. 15, Periwinkle Street, Fish Town.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  Visits Dolls House City every<br>
+  Friday.<br>
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  HALL-IN-THE-WOOD.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  The Most Up-to-Date<br>
+  and spacious<br>
+  Playhouse in Birdland City.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  EVERY NIGHT, AT 8.15,<br>
+  The Management will present:<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  Who Killed Cock Robin?<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  A Drama in Two Acts.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  Box Office open 10 a.m. to 6 p.m.<br>
+  Times and Prices as usual.<br>
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  GOLLIWOG & TEDDY BEAR<br>
+  RAILWAY.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  DAY AT THE SEASIDE.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  On Wednesday Next<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  A<br>
+  CHEAP EXCURSION<br>
+  will be run as under to<br>
+  TOY-TOWN-ON-SEA,<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  from the under-mentioned<br>
+  Stations:&mdash;<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  Dolls House City . . . 8. 1<br>
+  Kitten Town . . . . . . . 8. 8<br>
+  Poodleton . . . . . . . . . 8.16<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Arriving at:<br>
+  Toy-Town . . . . . . . 10. 5<br>
+  Return Train . . . . . . 9.15<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  No Paper Bags or other Luggage<br>
+  allowed.<br>
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  WILLIAM DOGG & CO.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  Under Distinguished Patronage.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  RAT AND VERMIN<br>
+  DESTROYERS.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  Premises Visited . . . Advice<br>
+  given.<br>
+  Large Staff of Worriers kept.<br>
+  Warranted to Worry Well.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  Telegrams: Worryem,<br>
+  THE KENNELS, WEST DOGTON.<br>
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  GOLLIWOG CUP FINAL.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  KITTEN TOWN<br>
+  versus<br>
+  POODLETON,<br>
+  on the<br>
+  Dolls House City Ground.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  Kick-Off at 3.30 p.m.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  Special Excursions from all parts<br>
+  by the G. & T. B. R.<br>
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  W. PLUSH MOLE,<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  DEALER in all kinds of FURS.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  <i>Note the Address</i>&mdash;<br>
+  No. 16, HIGH STREET,<br>
+  DOLLS HOUSE CITY.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  Reached from all parts by the<br>
+  G. & T.B. Underground.<br>
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  TEDDIO-GOLLIWOG<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  EXHIBITION<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  Lighted by Ten Thousand Lanterns.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  OPEN ALL DAY AND ALL NIGHT.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  See THE SECOND FIDDLE<br>
+  See THE LITTLE PITCHERS<br>
+  See THE JOLLYWOGGLE<br>
+  See THE MAGIC CORRIDOR<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  DOLLS HOUSE CITY.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  Special Excursions from all Parts<br>
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  TRY OUR FAMOUS<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  Mouse-Scented Soap:<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  "LICK-LICK."<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  Awarded Gold Medal in Teddio-<br>
+  Golliwog Exhibition.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  SPECIALLY RECOMMENDED<br>
+  FOR<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  PERSIANS.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  Fur Will not Roll on the Tongue.<br>
+  Clean, Comfortable, and Catty.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  THOMAS PURR-CAT & CO.,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Soap Makers,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Tabby Row,<br>
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;KITTEN TOWN.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  Telegrams: Toiletmadeasy.<br>
+  Telephone: 1044, Catter Waul.<br>
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+TIME TABLE.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+GOLLIWOG AND TEDDY BEAR RAILWAY.
+</p>
+
+<p><br></p>
+
+<pre>
+  Dolls House City   7. 5  *7.55   8.50  †11. 0  1.20   3.30   6.40   9.20
+  Frogland           7.11   8. 1   8.57   10. 7  1.28   3.37   6.48   9.27
+  Kitten Town        7.19   8.10   9. 4   10.15  1.38   3.48   6.56   9.34
+  Poodleton          7.29   8.19   9.13    ...   1.49   3.58   7. 7   9.43
+  West Dogton        7.42   8.32   9.27     A    2. 4  ‡4.13  ‡7.23   9.57
+  Birdland City      7.59   8.40   9.35    ...   2.13   4.22   7.32  10. 5
+  Fish Town          9.17  11.50  12. 0    1.10  4.43   6.21   S.S.   9.55
+  Toy Town           9.20  11.53   ...     2.15  5.10   6.40   ...   10. 0
+</pre>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  * Market train.<br>
+  † Express.<br>
+  ‡ Saturdays only.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+A Stops to Pick up passengers for Toy Town.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+S.S. Stops at Fish Town on Sats.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+The Golliwog News.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  OFFICE:<br>
+  DOLLS HOUSE CITY.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+POLLYWOG'S WEAKNESS.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+MUCH TOO FOND OF JAM.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A Pollywog was summoned at
+the Dolls House City Petty
+Sessions to-day for stealing jam
+from Miss Freda Morris' Nursery
+Stores.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mr. Jolly Jack described how
+he found a jammy spoon on the
+stairs, afterwards tracing the jam
+to a jar under the Pollywog's
+bed.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The prisoner sobbed bitterly
+and said she had no father or
+mother.  She admitted that she
+was very fond of jam, and that
+she was accustomed to sit up in
+bed and eat it with a spoon.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mr. Justice Max said she would
+be sent to a Training Home for
+Young Polliwogs.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+THE DOLLS' PARLIAMENT
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+REGRETTABLE INCIDENT.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+Dolls' Nursing Bill Passed
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There was great excitement
+at the Dolls' Parliament last
+night, when the Nursing of Dolls
+Bill became law, and it will
+interest our readers to know that
+it is now a punishable offence to
+nurse a Doll for more than two
+hours at a time.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There was a large and fashionable
+gathering present to watch
+the closing stages.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mr. Henry Toad, the Member
+for East Frogland, croaked to
+such good purpose that he
+carried all the Members of the
+Froggie benches with him.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mr. Toad is a polished gentleman
+of the world, and his
+croakings were listened to with
+much interest.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mr. Thomas Purr-Cat mewed
+very lustily in favour of the Bill.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It will be remembered that
+Mr. Purr-Cat was recently returned
+for Kitten Town with a large
+majority, chiefly because of the
+views he held on fish.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A regrettable incident took
+place when Mr. William Dogg,
+head of the well-known firm of
+rat-worriers, put forward
+remarks which caused considerable
+disturbance in the House.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It was resented by all parties
+that Mr. Dogg apparently
+desired to use his undoubted gifts
+for an unlawful purpose.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The objectionable statement
+being withdrawn, order was
+very quickly restored, but it was
+noted that as Mr. Dogg sat down
+he wore a "worried" look.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Member for Dolls House
+City (Mr. Mortimer Max) made
+the speech of the evening.  He
+asserted boldly that Miss Gladys
+had a habit of slapping him on
+the head.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+This lady, who was present
+and heard the statement, threatened
+to settle with him later,
+but whether she has done so or
+not our representatives have
+been unable to find out.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+FATALITY AT FISH TOWN.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+CHEAP JACK EATEN
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+"Reformed" Shark's Rash Act.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+MILITARY CALLED OUT.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+[FROM OUR OWN CORRESPONDENT.]
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+FISH TOWN.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A shocking fatality occurred
+at Fish Town to-day.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The "Reformed" Shark has
+killed and eaten the Cheap Jack,
+and absconded with the recipe
+for making the famous Seaweed
+Cough Juice.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Last night he first alarmed
+the Cheap Jack by approbating
+and adorning himself with that
+gentleman's cheap jewellery.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Then he swallowed the
+remaining bottles of cough mixture
+and attacked and robbed the
+Cheap Jack of the valuable recipe.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Having secured the recipe he
+calmly made a meal of the
+unfortunate Pike, and then left the
+town before suspicions were
+aroused.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The First Battalion Walrus
+Dragoons (King Neptune's Own)
+were ordered out immediately
+and are now in hot pursuit.
+"Fighting" Lobbs has also
+received instructions to hold his
+regiment in readiness if called
+upon.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The departure of the Crab
+Guards from Fish Town to Dolls
+House City has also been
+indefinitely postponed, and the
+Mounted Plaice are being rapidly
+mobilized.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+THREE LOST BROTHERS
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  AND THEIR HAPPY<br>
+  RE-UNION.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Our many readers will be glad
+to know that the recent Christmas
+party, given by the "Golliwog
+News" served at least one
+very useful purpose.  We refer
+to the meeting of Father
+Christmas and Father Neptune&mdash;the
+long lost brothers.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It is a source of great
+satisfaction to us to know that we
+have been able to perform such
+a great public service.  These
+very interesting and widely
+known old fellows had not met
+since their infancy, and their
+meeting was a very affecting one.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The near relationship of these
+famous old gentlemen will come
+as a complete surprise, but we
+have still another extraordinary
+circumstance to disclose.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+We have since learnt that
+Father Time is also a member of
+the very same family, and if he
+had not been prevented from
+attending our party, owing to a
+very bad attack of gout, the
+three of them would have met
+under our roof.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+We are glad to state, however,
+that they have met together
+entirely as a result of the
+enquiries we set afoot, and have
+celebrated their re-union with a
+sort of "house warming" or
+"wake."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It is most unique that three
+members of one family should
+rise to such eminence in the land,
+and we have great pleasure in
+placing that fact upon record.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+MR. ALGERNON BILLIKINS.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mr. Algernon Billikins has
+recently passed the Toy Town
+matric with honours.  This
+interesting piece of news is
+calculated to astonish every one
+of our many readers, as the gentle
+man was hitherto thought to be
+insane.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+THE TOY TOWN POETESS.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mrs. Selina Starchup, who is
+a frequent contributor to our
+"Poet's Corner," and who
+seldom speaks except in rhyme,
+is publishing a small volume of
+verse early next year.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Lovers of this gifted lady's
+verse have long wanted a
+collection of her miscellaneous work
+brought out in volume form, and
+the publishers inform us that
+a huge demand is anticipated.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+MR. WILLIAM DOGG, M.P.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+MISSING SINCE YESTERDAY.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The senior member of the
+firm of Messrs. Dogg and
+Co. left home yesterday on a
+rat-worrying expedition and has not
+been seen or heard of since.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+If he does not return this will
+prove a sad blow to West Dogton
+which he represents in Parliament.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+WOOD LIMBO CONCERT.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+ACCIDENT TO FAT DOLL.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+[FROM OUR OWN CORRESPONDENT.]
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+TOY TOWN.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The annual concert in aid of
+that deserving charity, the Wood
+Limbo Hospital Fund, was held
+last night at Toy Town.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It is well known that this
+splendid institution provides
+free arms and legs for Dolls in
+reduced circumstances, and is
+worthy of the warmest support.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The concert was well attended,
+and a very high-class entertainment
+was given.  Amongst the
+performers were such popular
+artistes as Mr. Barker Pupp,
+Mr. Merry Codfish and Professor
+Sea Serpent.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+We regret having to announce
+an unfortunate accident which
+took place during Professor
+Sea Serpent's amusing tricks.
+A Fat Doll who, with his wife
+Selina, occupied a private box,
+laughed so heartily that he
+broke his mainspring and was at
+once conveyed to the Wood
+Limbo Hospital, where he was
+detained.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+We learn on going to press
+that owing to his wiry constitution
+he is likely to recover.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+THE SCARECROW'S TRICK
+</p>
+
+<p>
+We hear that Mr. Scarecrow
+played an amusing trick on the
+Coroner and Jury last week.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It is said that none of the Jury
+have been near his field since,
+which we can well believe.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+OLD "BOOTS" IN TROUBLE.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+FLOGGED AND DEPORTED.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A respectably dressed gentleman,
+answering to the name of
+"Old Boots" appeared before
+the Magistrates yesterday at
+Dolls House City on a charge of
+"squeaking."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It was stated in Court that the
+old chap was always offending
+in this respect, and that he had
+been convicted so many times
+that the police were tired of
+arresting him.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+However, they were obliged
+to take him into custody on this
+occasion because he persisted
+in creating the form of
+disturbance complained of in the
+grounds of the Teddio-Golliwog
+Exhibition.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Prisoner "squeaked" so
+much when being brought into
+the dock that the Magistrates
+who had been provided with
+tea cosies, covered up their heads
+and sentenced prisoner, without
+even so much as glancing at him,
+to be flogged as an incorrigible
+rogue and deported.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+After prisoner had been removed
+to the cells, the Magistrates
+uncovered their ears and
+remarked that the severity of
+the punishment should go a
+long way towards ridding the
+country of such pests.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+ARREST OF POLLYWOG.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A Pollywog was brought up at
+Dolls House City yesterday
+before Mr. Justice Max, charged
+with creating a breach of the
+peace, and threatening the Prime
+Minister with a green and violet
+flag.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+She was, needless to say, a
+militant leader in the Votes for
+Pollywogs movement, and was
+sentenced to six months' imprisonment.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+We learn, as we go to press,
+that the prisoner refused to eat
+the prison fare&mdash;marmalade and
+pickles&mdash;and was consequently
+released this morning.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+PUNCH AND JUDY SHOW.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Proprietors of the Toy
+Town Punch and Judy Show beg
+to inform their numerous and
+esteemed patrons that the
+infamous person known as Edward
+Bear, recently in their employ
+as Dog Toby, has now ceased to
+have any connection with them,
+and is not authorised to collect
+or receive monies on their behalf.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+With regard to the report that
+the performances at the show
+are to be discontinued, the
+Proprietors further state that it
+is absolutely untrue, and that
+they have been fortunate in
+securing the services of
+Mr. Biter Pupp (son of the
+well-known singer), whose realistic
+representation of the immortal
+Dog Toby, leaves nothing to be
+desired.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+THE GOLD BUTTON TRIAL
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+PRISONER'S DISGUISE.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+Escape from Toy Cupboard.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+CAUGHT AT TOY TOWN.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  [FROM OUR SPECIAL<br>
+  CORRESPONDENT AT THE COURT.]<br>
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mr. Tommy Stapleton's Teddy
+Bear was brought before Mr. Justice
+Max at Dolls House City
+Police Court to-day, charged with
+cutting off the gold buttons from
+Mr. Jolly Jack's coat, while at
+Miss Gladys' birthday party.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The story of the discovery of
+the theft was told by Mr. Tommy
+Stapleton; how the artful Bear
+had hidden the buttons under
+his coat and then tried to make
+believe they were nuts.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+He also told how Teddy was
+put into the toy cupboard, and
+of the further discovery of his
+escape later.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+At this point the Bear volunteered
+the information that, with
+the assistance of Mr. Billikins,
+he secreted himself in the Dolls'
+cradle, first turning out the
+Nigger Twins who were both
+fast asleep.  Then when the
+cradle was removed next morning,
+by Jane, the housemaid, he
+made good his escape and fled to
+Toy Town, disguised as a Dog-Toby.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A Golliwog Policeman:
+"Shall I arrest the Billikins,
+your Honour?"
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mr. Justice Max: "Certainly
+not.  You know very well
+that he is insane."
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Miss Gladys next told how
+when at Toy Town with Miss
+Freda Morris, they discovered
+the Bear, who was quickly
+captured and taken to Toy-Town Gaol.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+In reply to a question from
+Mr. Justice Max, Mr. Tommy
+Stapleton said that his Bear
+played truant from school just
+when he thought proper, and
+sometimes he stayed out all
+night.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+"What a bad Teddy you
+are," said Mr. Justice Max
+gravely.  "I shall send you to
+Toy-Town Reformatory until
+you are a better Bear."
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+ONE HUNDRED YEARS OLD.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+AGED POLLYWOG INTERVIEWED.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mrs. Mary Ann James, of
+Dolls House City, celebrated her
+100th birthday on Monday last.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It is interesting to note that
+the old lady is the great-grand-parent
+of the Editor of this
+Journal.  She is in perfectly
+good health and can see to read
+"The Golliwog News" without
+glasses.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The old lady believes her long
+life is due to the fact that she
+always goes to bed early, sucks
+an acid drop before going to
+sleep, and reads no other paper
+but "The Golliwog News."
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+GOLLIWOG CUP FINAL.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+POODLETON v. KITTEN TOWN.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+Great Win for the Poodles.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The final match for the greatly
+prized Golliwog Cup took place
+on Saturday last, when it was
+apparently a case of all roads
+leading to the Dolls House
+City Football Ground, for nearly
+everybody went to see the game.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The rival teams, Poodleton
+and Kitten Town, were very
+evenly matched, but after a
+hard fought game the Poodles
+carried off the trophy by one
+goal to nil.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The strength of the two clubs,
+as shown by their positions in
+the Golliwog League, which we
+give below, is an indication
+what a splendid game took
+place.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+  THE GOLLIWOG LEAGUE.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+  &nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;Pd. W. D. L. Pt.<br>
+</p>
+
+<pre>
+  Poodleton ...........  10  8  2  0  18
+  Kitten Town Tabbies    10  8  2  0  18
+  Frogland Jumpers ....   9  5  2  2  12
+  Fish Town ...........   9  3  5  1  11
+  Toy Town Toys .......  10  3  3  4   9
+  Teddy Bear Rovers ...   8  4  0  4   8
+  Dolls House City ....  10  3  0  7   6
+</pre>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+COMEDIANS' BEREAVEMENT.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+We regret to announce that
+the only brother of Mr. Merry
+Codfish has been caught and
+sold as an article of diet.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mr. Merry Codfish has
+consequently gone into mourning,
+and will not appear in public for
+at least six months.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+OUR POETS' CORNER.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+ADELIZA'S DREAM.
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  She dreamt she bit the Teddy Bear.<br>
+  And pinched the Nigger Twins.<br>
+  She pulled Toy Monkey's wiry hair,<br>
+  And slapped the Billikins.<br>
+  Then all the woolly hairy crew<br>
+  Miss Gladys loved so dearly.<br>
+  She flung as far as Timbuctoo,&mdash;<br>
+  Up to the moon&mdash;or nearly!<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  And then she dreamed Miss Gladys smiled,<br>
+  And loved her all the day,<br>
+  "My only darling precious child,<br>
+  My Adeliza May!"<br>
+  You're better far than Teddy Bears,<br>
+  Or dusky Nigger Twins:<br>
+  I hate the grinning face he wears<br>
+  That horrid Billikins.<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="poem">
+  Alas!  The bell for nursery tea!<br>
+  She woke and shook herself.<br>
+  Saw Teddy and the proud Monkey,<br>
+  The Billikins and Niggers wee,<br>
+  Were on Miss Gladys' lap&mdash;and SHE<br>
+  WAS ON THE NURSERY SHELF!<br>
+</p>
+
+<p class="noindent">
+SELINA STARCHUP.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+FIRST TILE CONCERT.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Miss Spottikins asks us to
+announce that her first tile
+concert of the season will be held
+on Thursday next, and is open
+to all lovers of the refined and
+beautiful in tile music.  The
+performance will commence at 7.
+Sparrows and mice at 8.30.
+Carriages at 10.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+GOLLIWOGLAND MUSEUM.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+SOME RECENT ADDITIONS.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The gold buttons stolen from
+Mr. Jolly Jack's coat have now
+been placed in the Royal
+Golliwogland Museum.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Another interesting addition
+is a Pollywog's green and violet
+flag, with which, it is alleged, the
+Pollywog tried to strike the
+Prime Minister.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+But perhaps the most valuable
+possession of recent times,
+is a Comet's tail, which has been
+preserved in spirit at enormous
+cost.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+MISS MAY'S MARRIAGE.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It has only just leaked out
+that Miss Adeliza May was
+married last week to Mr. Jolly
+Jack.  The event took place
+quietly, the ceremony being
+performed by Miss Gladys,
+assisted by Miss Freda Morris.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Miss Spottikins made a very
+charming bridesmaid dressed up
+in Freda's hat and cloak, and
+Mr. Billikins acted as best man
+with his accustomed dignity
+and distinction.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+THE KEEPER OF THE M.B.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Keeper of the Money-Box
+left Dolls House City yesterday
+to spend the week-end in the
+country.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+It is rumoured that he packed
+the M.B. with his silk hat, and
+the valuable receptacle passed
+unnoticed.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+WHO KILLED COCK ROBIN
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Who killed Cock Robin?
+Why the Sparrow of course.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+If you haven't seen the play
+in two acts now being performed
+at the Hall-in-the-Wood, Birdland
+City, you really ought.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Gladys and Tommy and Freda
+were there last night and a very
+fine time they had.  The play
+is drawing crowded houses every
+night and is having a decided
+spell of popularity.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+MESSENGER BOY'S HEROISM.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+OF THE R.S.P.C.E.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Master Henry Bruin, aged
+thirteen years, has been awarded
+a gold medal by the Royal
+Society for the Prevention of
+Cruelty to Elephants.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+This brave little fellow was
+returning home after delivering
+an important message from the
+Prime Minister to the Editor of
+"The Golliwog News," when
+he saw an aged and infirm
+Elephant endeavouring to get
+out of the way of a tram car.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The heartless driver seemed to
+take pleasure in running down
+and startling invalid Toys, and
+the Elephant in question was
+obliged to abandon his crutches
+and hurry to a place of safety
+without them.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Master Bruin, at great personal
+risk, darted into the road and
+secured the crutches, thereby
+preventing a suspicious looking
+Golliwog, with a coster's barrow,
+from appropriating them.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+MISSED THE EXCURSION.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A little Teddy Bear in brown
+knickers, clasping a spade and
+bucket in ids hands, was
+discovered asleep in the waiting
+room at Toy Town station after
+the return excursion train had
+left.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+When awakened by a friendly
+porter, the poor little fellow
+cried bitterly, and asked to be
+taken to his daddy.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Fortunately, he was identified
+by a brass trouser button, and
+sent to his distracted parents
+by the next train, which
+happened to be the last that night.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+TOY TOWN EXCURSION.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+MR. BARKER PUFF'S BIG HIT.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The last excursion of the
+season to Toy-Town-on-Sea was
+well patronized last week.  Nearly
+everybody went, and a right merry
+time they had on the sands.
+Gladys, Tommy and Freda were
+all there.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mr. Barker Pupp made a big
+hit with his song, "The Yellow
+Butterfly."  In fact he hit
+Tommy Stapleton very hard.
+It is freely stated that Tommy
+was in a blue funk, and that he
+was greatly relieved when he
+found that the crowd which
+followed him was only running to
+catch the train?
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+SIR SOLOMON'S HOLIDAY.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Sir Solomon and Lady Seal
+have left Fish Town for a brief
+stay in the North.  Sir Solomon
+is badly in need of rest after his
+arduous public duties.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+CONFINED TO BARRACKS.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+We learn that Shelliback of
+the Lobster Fusiliers, has been
+confined to Barracks for neglecting
+to salute his superior officer,
+"Fighting Lobbs."
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+WITHOUT A TICKET.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Nigger Twins were fined
+at Dolls House City Police Court
+to-day for riding on the G. &amp;
+T.B.R. without having paid
+their fare.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+PARTNERSHIP.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mr. Peter Bunney is entering
+into partnership with Mr. Plush
+Mole, the celebrated furrier,
+and the business is to be carried
+on under the name of Bunney
+and Mole.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+LOST LUGGAGE.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Mr. Camel who was indiscreet
+enough to travel with luggage
+on Christmas Eve, lost a large
+consignment of dates, and has
+got the hump in consequence.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p class="t3">
+FOR YOUNG FRY.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Professor Walruzzio has
+compiled a pianoforte-tutor which
+should prove itself a golden
+guide to young fry with musical
+proclivities.  The book is
+published by Messrs. Bleak &amp; Brill,
+and the price is half-a-neptune,
+net.
+</p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p><br><br><br></p>
+
+<p><a id="chap14"></a></p>
+
+<p class="t2">
+Father Neptune's Treasure
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+BY
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+PHILIP &amp; FAY INCHFAWN.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+A fascinating story of Gladys, Freda and Tommy,
+with their little friend, John James, under the sea.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+To begin with, the children are told by Father
+Neptune that his Castle is haunted!  And then
+commences the unravelling of the mystery,&mdash;which
+proves a very exciting business,&mdash;and the chase of the
+intruder in the castle vaults.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Sea King's sunken treasure ships are next the
+scene of action, and the story describes the children's
+journey on Dolphin-back, and the discovery and
+capture of a giant Saw-fish rifling the treasure chests.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Following this, Father Neptune suddenly and
+mysteriously vanishes.  The children and the under-sea
+folk are at their wits end, but John James lights
+upon a daring plot which seeks to remove the Sea
+Monarch from his throne.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+While following up the clues the children and the
+Golliwog also disappear, but thanks to a very queer
+friend, the Hermit Crab, tidings of their whereabouts
+are forthcoming.  Mrs. Lobbs also supplies a valuable
+clue.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The chapters dealing with the discovery of the
+robbers' cave, where the children and the Sea King
+have been imprisoned, and the recovery of Father
+Neptune's stolen treasure are absorbingly interesting.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The story is told with a quaint humour that is
+irresistibly entertaining.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+There are eight illustrations on art paper by
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+F. C. WARD.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+Artistic Coloured Wrapper
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+Cloth board 3/6 net.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+S. W. PARTRIDGE AND Co., LTD., Old Bailey, E.C.
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br></p>
+
+<hr>
+
+<p><br><br></p>
+
+<p class="t2">
+Father Neptune's Diamond
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+BY
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+PHILIP &amp; FAY INCHFAWN.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Another delightful story of the three children and
+John James, the Golliwog, describing their adventures
+searching for the blue diamond&mdash;lost from Father
+Neptune's crown.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+All our old friends, Mr. Merry Codfish, Professor
+Sea Serpent, Fighting Lobbs, Sir Solomon and Lady
+Seal and many other equally "queer fish" appear
+again.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+Various clues are followed in their efforts to trace
+the diamond, some are amusing, and some are thrilling,
+but, perhaps the most exciting part of the story deals
+with the capture of John James by the Flying Fish.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The Golliwog is locked in the cabin of a sunken
+galleon, and through the port-hole, the history of a
+deeply laid plot&mdash;which includes the destruction of Fish
+Town&mdash;is revealed to him by the Fiddler Crab.  These
+Flyers of the deep, apparently, have Fish Town at their
+mercy, but their plot is frustrated and brought to
+failure by Tommy's plans.
+</p>
+
+<p>
+The defeat of Commander Saw, the story of the
+volcano under the sea, the ultimate return of John
+James, and the final recovery of the diamond make a
+fascinating tale.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;&mdash;
+</p>
+
+<p>
+There are twenty illustrations by THOMAS MAYBANK,
+in which he pictures various amusing and thrilling
+incidents throughout the book.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+Artistic Coloured Wrapper
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+Cloth board 3/6 net.
+</p>
+
+<p class="t3">
+S. W. PARTRIDGE AND Co. LTD., Old Bailey, E.C.
+</p>
+
+<p><br><br><br><br></p>
+<div style='text-align:center'>*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 79377 ***</div>
+</body>
+</html>
+
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+This book, including all associated images, markup, improvements,
+metadata, and any other content or labor, has been confirmed to be
+in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES.
+
+Procedures for determining public domain status are described in
+the "Copyright How-To" at https://www.gutenberg.org.
+
+No investigation has been made concerning possible copyrights in
+jurisdictions other than the United States. Anyone seeking to utilize
+this eBook outside of the United States should confirm copyright
+status under the laws that apply to them.
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+[Project Gutenberg](https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for eBook [#79377](https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/79377)