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diff --git a/79070-0.txt b/79070-0.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..23c85ad --- /dev/null +++ b/79070-0.txt @@ -0,0 +1,11969 @@ +*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 79070 *** + + + + + + + MEADOW BROOK + + + BY + + MRS. MARY J. HOLMES + + AUTHOR OF THE "ENGLISH ORPHAN," "THE HOMESTEAD ON THE + HILL SIDE," "LENA RIVERS," "TEMPEST AND SUNSHINE," ETC. + + + + NEW YORK + THE FEDERAL BOOK COMPANY + PUBLISHERS + + + + + TO + + MY MOTHER, + + Who, more than any one else, will be interested in a story + which has in it so much of my childhood and early home, + + THIS WORK + + is affectionately dedicated by her Daughter + + MARY. + + + + +PREFACE. + +In this story of MEADOW BROOK there is, I am aware, nothing very +startling or wonderful; but it has the merit, at least, of containing +more truth than books of the same character usually possess. From +this, however, the reader is not to infer that I have made myself the +heroine; for though the early home, the childhood, and childish +experience of "Rosa Lee" are mostly my own--while more than one +whiskered young man will recognize the little girl of thirteen, at +whom he once made faces from behind his desk as the +"schoolma'am"--the similarity extends no further. + +The fickle Mr. Clayton and his haughty bride, the unfortunate +Herbert, the disappointed Ada, the proud Southern planter, and the +gentle, bright-haired Jessie, are intended to represent different +varieties of American character, and are such as many of us have met +in our intercourse with the world. For my portrayals of Georgia +life, I am indebted to a friend, who recently spent two years in that +State, and whose graphic descriptions of what she there saw have been +to me of much service. + +Believing that the world loves better to read of the probable than of +the improbable, I have tried to be natural; and if, by this means, +but one friend is added to the number I now possess, I shall feel +that my labor has not been in vain. + +M. J. H. + +ROCKPORT, N. Y., 1857. + + + + + CONTENTS. + + + CHAPTER. + + I. Childhood + II. Thanksgiving + III. Cousin Will + IV. The Schoolmistress + V. Pine Hill + VI. Doctor Clayton's Visit + VII. Dell Thompson's Party + VIII. Close of School in Pine District + IX. Pro and Con + X. Mrs. Dr. Clayton + XI. Boston + XII. Ada Montrose + XIII. The Flight + XIV. Ten Thousand Dollars + XV. The Old Homestead + XVI. "Out West," + XVII. The Dark Man + XVIII. The Death of the Drunkard + XIX. The Death of the Righteous + XX. Going South + XXI. Uncle Dick + XXII. Ada + XXIII. Dr. Clayton + XXIV. The Crisis + XXV. The Angel of the Pines + XXVI. Return + XXVII. Light + XXVIII. The Chase + XXIV. Human Nature + XXX. "The Southern Planter's Northern Bride" + XXXI. Sunny Bank + XXXII. November 25th + + + +The Criminal Witness + + + + +MEADOW BROOK. + + + +CHAPTER I. + +CHILDHOOD. + +Far away among the New England hills stands a large, old-fashioned +farmhouse, around whose hearthstone not many years agone, a band of +merry, noisy children played, myself the merriest, noisiest of them +all. It stood upon an eminence overlooking a broad strip of rolling +meadowland, at the extremity of which was the old gray rock, where +the golden rod and sassafras grew, where the green ivy crept over the +crumbling wall, and where, under the shadow of the thorn-apple tree, +we built our play-houses, drinking our tea from the acorn saucers, +and painting our dolls' faces with the red juice of the poke berries, +which grew there in great abundance. + +Just opposite our house, and across the green meadow, was a shady +grove, where, in the spring-time, the singing birds made their nests, +and where, when the breath of winter was on the snow-clad hills, +Lizzie, Carrie, and I, and our taller, stronger brothers dragged our +sleds, dashing swiftly down the steep hill, and away over the +ice-covered valley below. Truly, ours was a joyous childhood, and +ours a happy home; for never elsewhere fell the summer's golden +sunlight so softly, and never was music sweeter than was the murmur +of the dancing water-brook which ran past our door, and down the long +green lane, losing itself at last in the dim old woods, which +stretched away to the westward, seeming to my childish imagination +the boundary line between this world and the next. + +In the deep shadow of those woods I have sat alone for many an hour, +watching the white, feathery clouds as they glimmered through the +dense foliage which hung above my head, and musing, I scarcely knew +of what. Strange fancies filled my brain and oftentimes, as I sat +there in the hazy light of an autumnal afternoon, there came and +talked with me myriads of little people, unseen, it is true, but +still real to me, who knew and called them all by name. There, on a +mossy bank, beneath the wide-spreading grapevine, with the running +brook at my feet, I felt the first longings for fame, though I did +not thus designate it then. I only knew that I wanted a name which +should live when I was gone--a name of which my mother should be +proud. It had been to me a day of peculiar trial. At school +everything had gone wrong. Accidentally I had discovered that I +possessed a talent for rhyming; and so, because I preferred filling +my slate with verses, instead of proving on it that four times twenty +were eighty, and that eighty, divided by twenty, equalled four, my +teacher must needs find fault with me, calling me "lazy," and +compelling me to sit between two hateful boys, with warty hands, who +for the remainder of the afternoon amused themselves by sitting +inconveniently near to me, and by telling me how big my eyes and feet +were. I hardly think I should now mind that mode of punishment, +provided I could choose the boys, but I did then, and in the worst of +humors, I started for home, where other annoyances awaited me. +Sally, the housemaid, scolded me for upsetting a pan of milk on her +clean pantry shelf, calling me "the carelessest young one she ever +saw," and predicting that "I'd one day come to the gallus if I didn't +mend my ways." + +Juliet, my oldest sister, scolded me for wearing without her consent +her shell side-comb, which, in climbing through a hole in the +plastering of the schoolhouse, I accidentally broke. Grandmother +scolded me for mounting to the top of her high chest of drawers to +see what was in them; and to crown all, when, towards sunset, I came +in from a romp in the barn, with my yellow hair flying all over my +face, my dress burst open, my pantalet split from the top downward, +and my sunbonnet hanging down my back, my mother reproved me +severely, telling me I was "a sight to behold." This was my usual +style of dress, and I didn't think any one need interfere; so, when +she wondered if there ever was another such child, and bade me look +at myself in the glass, asking if "I didn't think I was a beautiful +object," my heart came up in my throat, and with the angry response +that "I couldn't help my looks--I didn't make myself," I started +through the door, and running down the long lane to the grapevine, my +favorite resort, I threw myself upon the ground, and burying my face +in the tall grass, wept bitterly, wishing I had never been born, or, +being born, that the ban of ugliness were not upon me. + +Mother doesn't love me, I thought--nobody loves me; and then I wished +that I could die, for I had heard that the first dead of a family, no +matter how unprepossessing they had been in life, were sure to be the +best beloved in the memory of the living. To die, then, that I might +be loved, was all I asked for, as I lay there weeping alone, and +thinking in my childish grief that never before was a girl, nine +summers old, so wretched as myself. And then, in my imagination, I +went through with a mental rehearsal of my own obsequies, fancying +that I was dead, but still possessing the faculty of knowing all that +passed around me. + +With an involuntary shudder, I crossed my hands upon my bosom, +stretched my feet upon the mossy bank, and closed my eyes to the +fading sunlight, which I was never to see again. I knew they would +lay me in the parlor, and on my forehead I felt the gentle breeze as +it came through the open window, lifting the folds of the muslin +curtain which shaded it. Throughout the house was a deep hush, and +in my mother's voice there was a heart-broken tone, which I had never +heard before, and which thrilled me with joy, for it said that I was +loved at last. Then I thought how lonely they would be as day by day +went and came, and I came no more among them. "They will miss the +little ugly face," I said, and on my cheek my own hot tears fell as I +thought how Lizzie would mourn for me in the dark night time, weeping +that I was not by her side, but sleeping in a narrow coffin, which I +hoped would be a handsome one with satin hangings, as I had seen at +the funeral of a rich neighbor's fair young bride. I did not want +them to strew my pillow with roses as they did hers--for I knew they +would not accord with my thin, plain face. In the distance I heard +the sound of the tolling bell, and I saw the subdued expression on +the faces of my school companions as they listened breathlessly, +counting at last the nine quick strokes, which would tell to a +stranger that 'twas only a child who was gone. + +Then came the funeral, the roll of wheels, the tread of many feet, +the hum of voices, the prayer, the hymn, in which I longed to join, +but dared not for appearances' sake, and then, one by one, they stole +up for a last farewell, lifting my baby brother and bidding him look +upon the sister he would never know save by the grassy mound where +they would tell him she was buried. I knew when Lizzie bent over me +by the convulsive sob and burning kiss which she pressed upon my +lips, and divining her inmost thoughts, I fancied she was wishing +that no harsh word had ever passed between us. In my heart I longed +to tell her how freely I forgave her, but ere I had time to do so, +she stepped aside, while an older, a wrinkled hand was laid upon my +forehead, and my aged grandmother murmured, "Poor little Rosa, far +better that I should die, than that she, so young, should be laid in +the lonesome grave." + +Instantly the dark grave loomed up before me, so dark and dreary that +I shrank from being put there. I could not die; I was afraid to +sleep with the silent dead. I would far rather live, even though I +lived unloved forever. And then, softly in my ear, a spirit friend +whispered, "Be _great_ and _good_--get to yourself a name of which +they shall be proud--make them love you for your deeds, rather than +your looks, and when, in the future, strangers shall ask concerning +you, 'Who is she?' let it be their pride to answer, 'My daughter,' or +'My sister.'" Older and wiser heads than mine would have said it was +Ambition, which thus counseled with me, but I questioned her not of +her name. I only knew that her words were sweet and soothing, and I +treasured them in my heart, pondering upon them until I fell asleep, +unconscious that the daylight was fast declining, and that the heavy +dew was falling upon my uncovered head. + +Meantime at home many inquiries were being made concerning my +whereabouts, and when, at last, night came on, and I was still away, +my oldest brother was sent in quest of me down the long lane where I +was last seen by Lizzie, who had attempted to follow me, but had +desisted through fear of being called a _tag_. I was just dreaming +that the trumpet of fame was sounding forth my name, when, alas! I +awoke to find it was only brother Charlie, making the woods resound +with "Rosa Lee! Where are you? Why don't you answer?" + +Of course I was disappointed,--who wouldn't be?--and in a fit of +obstinacy I determined not to reply, but to make him think I was +lost--then see how he'd feel! But on this point I was not to be +gratified, for failing of finding me in the lane, he made straight +for the grapevine, where he stumbled over me as I lay, this time +feigning sleep, to see what he would do. Seizing me by the shoulder, +he exclaimed, "You are a pretty bird, scaring us out of a year's +growth. Mother'll scold you well for this." + +But he was mistaken, for mother's manner towards me was greatly +changed. The torn pantalet and the chewed bonnet-strings were all +forgotten, and in the kindest tone she asked, "If I were not cold, +and why I went to sleep on the grass." There were tears in my eyes, +but I winked hard and forced them back, until Lizzie brought me a +piece of custard pie (my special favorite) which, she said, "she had +saved for me, because she knew how much I loved it." + +This was too much, and sitting down in Carrie's little chair, I cried +aloud, saying in reply to the oft-repeated question as to what ailed +me, that "I didn't know, only I was so glad." + +"Hystericky as a witch," was Sally's characteristic comment on my +strange behavior, at the same time she suggested that I be put to bed. + +To this I made no objection, and pushing aside the pie, which, to +Lizzie's disappointment, I could not eat, I went to my room, a +happier, and I believe, a better girl; so much influence has a kind +word or deed upon a desponding, sensitive child. That night I was +tired and restless, turning uneasily upon my pillow, pushing Lizzie's +arm from my neck, because it kept me from breathing, and lying awake +until I heard the long clock in grandma's room strike the hour of +twelve. Then I slept, but dreamed there was a heavy pain in my head, +which made me moan in my sleep, and that mother, attracted by the +sound, came to my side feeling my pulse, and saying, "What ails you, +Rosa?" "There was nothing ailed me," I said; but in the morning when +I awoke, the pain was still there, though I would not acknowledge it, +for scarcely anything could tempt me to stay away from school; so at +the usual hour I started, but the road was long and wearisome, and +twice I sat down to rest, leaning my forehead upon the handle of my +dinner-basket, and wondering why the smell of its contents made me so +sick. Arrived at school, everything seemed strange, and when Maria, +the girl who shared my desk, produced a love-letter from Tom Jenkins, +which she had found on my side of the desk, and in which he made a +formal offer of himself, frecks and all, I did not even smile. +Taking my book, I attempted to study, but the words ran together, the +objects in the room chased each other in circles, the little +Abecedarian, shouting the alphabet at the top of his voice, sounded +like distant thunder, and when at last the teacher called for our +class in "Colburn," she seemed to be a great way off, while between +her and me was a gathering darkness which soon shut out every object +from my view. + +For a few moments all was confusion, and when at last my faculties +returned I was lying on the recitation bench, my head resting in the +teacher's lap, while my hair and dress were so wet that I fancied I'd +been out in a drenching shower. Everybody was so kind and spoke so +softly to me that, with a vague impression that something had +happened, I began to cry. Just then, father, who had been sent for, +appeared, and taking me in his arms, started for home, while Lizzie +followed with the basket and my sunbonnet, which looked sorry and +drooping like its owner. At the door father asked of mother, who met +us, "Where shall I put her?" but ere she could reply, I said, "On +grandmother's bed." + +And there, among the soft pillows and snowy linen on which I had +often looked with almost envious eyes, and which now seemed so much +to rest me, I was laid. Of the weary weeks which followed, I have +only a confused recollection. I know that the room was darkened as +far as possible, and that before the window at the foot of the bed, +grandma's black shawl was hung, one corner being occasionally pinned +back when more light was needed. After a while it seemed to me that +it was Lizzie, instead of myself who was sick, and the physician said +she had a fever, which had been long coming on, but was undoubtedly +hastened by her sleeping on the wet grass in the night. And so we +all trod softly about the house, speaking in whispers, and lifting +the door-latches carefully, while Lizzie, with my cap and night dress +on, lay all day long in bed, never speaking, never moving, except +when the long clock in the corner struck off the hour; then she would +moan as if in pain, and once when somebody, who looked like Lizzie, +but was still I, Rosa, stole on tiptoe to her side, with a bouquet of +flowers, which Maria had brought, she put her arms around my neck, +and pointing to the clock, whispered, "It keeps saying 'She's +dead'!--'She's dead'!--'She's dead'! Won't you tell it to be still?" + +Then we knew that it disturbed her, and so the old clock was stopped, +a thing which grandma said "had not been in fifty odd years," except +the time when grandpa died, and then, with the going out of his life, +the clock itself ran down. All the night through the lamp burned +upon the table where stood the vials, the Dover powders, and the +cups, while Lizzie, with her great blue eyes so much like mine, wide +open, lay watching the flickering shadows on the wall, counting the +flowers on the paper bordering, wondering if there ever were blue +roses, and thinking if there were that they must smell as the dinner +did beneath the chestnut tree. + +At last, when the family were wearied out with watching, the +neighbors were called in, and among them our school-teacher, who +seemed to tread on air, so light and noiseless were her footsteps; +and Lizzie, when she saw how kind she was, wondered she had not loved +her better. Then came other watchers equally kind with Miss +Phillips, but possessing far less tact for nursing; and even now I +have a vivid remembrance of their annoying attempts "to fix me so I'd +be more comfortable." Was I lying in a position satisfactory to +myself, I must be lifted up, my pillows shaken, turned over, and my +head placed so high that my chin almost touched my chest. Did I fall +into a little doze, I must rouse up to tell whether I were asleep or +not, and did I get into a sound slumber I must surely wake enough to +say whether I wanted anything. + +Again, I fancied that another beside Lizzie was sick, for in mother's +room, contiguous to mine, there was a low hum of voices, a going in +and out, a careful shutting of the door, and gradually I got the +impression that Jamie, my beautiful baby brother, was connected with +all this, for I heard them talk of scarlet fever, and it's going hard +with him. But I had no desire or power to ask the why or wherefore; +and so time wore on, until there came a day when it seemed that the +reverie beneath the grapevine was coming true. There was the same +roll of wheels, the tread of many feet, and through the closed doors +I heard a mournful strain, sung by trembling voices, while from afar, +I caught the notes of a tolling bell. I was much alone that day, and +once, for more than an hour, there was no one with me excepting +grandma, who frequently removed her spectacles to wipe the moisture +which gathered upon them. + +From that day I grew worse, and they sent to Spencer for Dr. Lamb, +who, together with Dr. Griffin, held a council over me, and said that +I must die. I saw mother when they told her. She was standing by +the window, from which the black shawl had been removed, for nothing +disturbed the little girl now, and the window was wide open, so that +the summer air might cool the burning head from which the matted +yellow hair had all been shorn. She turned pale as death, and with a +cry of anguish, pressed her hand upon her side; but she did not weep. +I wondered at it then, and thought she cared less than Lizzie, who +sat at the foot of the bed, sobbing so loudly that the fever burned +more fiercely in my veins, and the physician said it must not be; she +must leave the room, or keep quiet. + +It was Monday, and a few hours afterward, as Sally was passing the +door, grandma handed her my dirty, crumpled sunbonnet, bidding her +wash it and put it away. Sally's voice trembled as she replied, "No, +no, leave it as it is, for when's she's gone, nothing will look so +much like her as that jammed bonnet with its chewed-up strings." + +A gush of tears was grandma's only answer, and after I got well, I +found the bonnet carefully rolled up in a sheet of clean white paper +and laid away in Sally's drawer. There were days and nights of +entire unconsciousness, and then with the vague, misty feeling of one +awakening from a long, disturbed sleep, I awoke again to life and +reason. The windows of my room were closed; but without, I heard the +patter of the September rain, and the sound of the autumnal wind as +it swept past the house. Gathered at my side were my father, mother, +brothers, sisters, grandmother; and all, as my eye rested upon their +faces, I thought, were paler and more careworn than when I last +looked upon them. Something, too, in their dress disturbed me; but, +before I could speak, a voice which I knew to be Dr. Griffin's said +"She is better--she will live." + +From my mother's lips there broke another cry--not like that which I +had heard when they told her I must die--but a cry of joy, and then +she fell fainting in my father's arms. I never doubted her love for +me again, but in bitterness of spirit, I have many a time wept that I +ever distrusted her, my blessed mother. + +The fourth day after the crisis I was alone with Lizzie, whom, for a +long time, I importuned to give me a mirror that I might see myself +once more. Yielding at length to my entreaties, she handed me a +small looking-glass, a wedding gift to my grandmother, and with the +consoling remark, that "I wouldn't always look so," awaited the +result. I am older than I was then, but even now I cannot repress a +smile as I bring before my mind the shorn head, the wasted face with +high cheek-bones, and the big blue eyes, in which there was a look of +"crazy Sal," which met my view. With the angry exclamation, "They'll +hate me worse than ever, I'm so ugly," I dashed the mirror upon the +floor, breaking it in a thousand pieces. Lizzie knew what I meant, +and twining her arms about my neck, she said, "Don't talk so, Rosa; +we love you dearly, and it almost killed us when we thought you +couldn't live. You know big men never cry, and pa the least of all. +Why, he didn't shed a tear when lit-"---- + +Here she stopped suddenly, as if on a forbidden subject, but soon +resuming the conversation, she continued, "But the day Dr. Lamb was +here and told us you would die, he was out under the cherry tree by +our play-house, and when Carrie asked him if you'd never play there +any more, he didn't answer, but turned his face towards the barn, and +cried so hard and so loud, that grandma came out and pitied him, +smoothing his hair just like he was a little boy. Brother Charlie, +too, lay right down in the grass, and said he'd give everything he'd +got if he'd never called you 'bung-eyed,' nor made fun of you, for he +loved you best of all. Then there was poor Jamie kept calling for +'Yosa'"---- + +Here Lizzie broke down entirely, saying, "I can't tell you any more, +don't ask me." + +Suddenly it occurred to me that I had neither seen nor heard little +Jamie, the youngest of us all, the pet and darling of our household. +Rapidly my thoughts traversed the past, and in a moment I saw it all. +"Jamie was dead." I did not need that Lizzie should tell me so. I +knew it was true, and when the first great shock was over, I +questioned her of his death, how and when it occurred. It seems that +I was at first taken with scarlet fever, which soon assumed another +form, but not until it had communicated itself to Jamie, who, after a +few days' suffering, had died. I had ever been his favorite, and to +the last he had called for me to come; my grandmother, with the +superstition natural to her age, construing it into an omen that I +was soon to follow him. + +Desolate and dreary seemed the house; and when I was able to go from +room to room, oh! how my heart ached as I missed the prattle of our +baby-boy. Away to the garret, where no one could see it, they had +carried his empty cradle, but I sought it out; and as I thought of +the soft, brown curls I had so often seen resting there, and would +never see again, I sat down by its side and wept most bitterly. The +withered, yellow leaves of autumn were falling upon his grave ere I +was able to visit it, and at its head stood a simple stone, on which +was inscribed, "Our Jamie." As I leaned against the cold marble, and +in fancy saw by its side--what had well-nigh been--another mound, and +another stone, bearing upon it the name of "Rosa," I involuntarily +shuddered; while from my heart there went up a silent thanksgiving, +that God, in his wise Providence, had ordered it otherwise. + +From that sickness I date a more healthful state of mind and feeling, +and though I still shrunk from any allusion to my personal +appearance, I never again doubted the love of those who had +manifested so much solicitude for me when ill, and who watched over +me so tenderly during the period of my convalescence, which was long +and wearisome, for the snows of an early winter lay upon the frozen +ground, ere I was well enough to take my accustomed place in the old +brown schoolhouse at the foot of the long hill. + + + + +CHAPTER II. + +THANKSGIVING. + +Thanksgiving! How many reminiscences of the olden time does that +word call up, when sons and daughters, they who had wandered far and +wide, whose locks, once brown and shining with the sunlight of youth, +now give tokens that the autumnal frosts of life are falling slowly +upon them, return once more to the old hearthstone, and, for a brief +space, grow young again amid the festive scenes of Thanksgiving Day. +To you, who, like me, drew your first breath among the New England +hills, and who have strayed away from your early home, in the busy +world in which you are now mingling, comes there not occasionally +pleasant memories of the olden time, when with eager haste you hied +you back to the roof-tree which sheltered your infancy? And though, +perchance, the snows of many a winter may have drifted across the +graves of the gray-haired man you called your father, and the +mild-eyed woman who bore the blessed name of mother, can you not +recall them to mind, as when with tears of joy and words of love, +they welcomed their children home, thanking God that as yet not one +of their household treasures was missing? And if, after the lapse of +years, there came a time when the youngest of you all was gone, when +the childish prattle you loved so well to hear was hushed, when +through the house was no more heard the patter of little, busy feet, +when there was naught left of the lost one, save a curl of golden +hair, or a tiny shoe, soiled and bent, but looking still so much like +him who wore it once, that you preserve it as your choicest treasure: +if, I say, there came to you a time like this, do you not remember +how, amid all the social cheer, there was still an aching void, which +nothing around you could fill? + +But, lest I make this chapter too sad, I shall not speak of our +feelings as we missed our baby brother, for they who have lost from +their fireside an active, playful child understand, far better than I +can describe, the loneliness, the longing for something gone, which +becomes almost a part of their being, although at times they may seem +to forget. Children's grief is seldom as lasting as that of mature +years; and hence it is not strange if I sometimes forgot my sorrow in +the joyous anticipation of Thanksgiving Day, which was then to me but +another name for plum puddings, chicken pies, meeting dresses, +morocco shoes, city cousins, a fire in the parlor, and last, though +not least, the privilege of sitting at the first table, and using +grandma's six tiny silver spoons, with the initials of her maiden +name, "P.S." marked upon them. + +On such occasions my thoughts invariably took a leap backward, and +looking at grandma's wrinkled face and white, shining hair, I would +wonder if she ever were young like me; and if, being young, she swung +on gates or climbed trees, and walked the great beams, as I did. +Then, with another bound, my thoughts would penetrate the future, +when I, a dignified grandmother, should recline in my armchair, +stately and stiff, in my heavy satin and silver gray, while my oldest +son, a man just my father's size, should render me all the homage and +respect due to one of my age. By myself, too, I had several times +tried on grandma's clothes, spectacles, cap and all; and then, seated +in her chair, with the big Bible in my lap, I had expounded scripture +to the imaginary children around me, frequently reprimanding _Rosa_ +for her inattention, asking her what "she thought would become of +her, if she didn't stop wriggling so in her chair, and learn 'the +chief end of man.'" Once, in the midst of my performance, grandma +herself appeared, and as a natural consequence, I was divested of my +fixings in a much shorter space of time than it had taken me to don +them. From that day up to the period of my illness, I verily believe +grandma looked upon me as "given over to hardness of heart and +blindness of mind." + +But I am wandering from my subject, which was, I believe, the +Thanksgiving succeeding Jamie's death and my own recovery from +sickness. For this occasion great preparations were made, it being +confidently expected that my father's brother, who lived in Boston, +would be with us together with his wife, a lady whose reputation for +sociability and suavity of manners was, with us, rather below par. +She was my uncle's second wife, and rumor said that neither himself +nor his home were as comfortable as they once had been. From the +same reliable source, too, we learned that she breakfasted in her own +room at ten, dined at three, made or received calls until six, went +to parties, soirées, or the theater in the evening, and seldom got to +bed until two o'clock in the morning; a mode of living which was +pronounced little better than heathenish by grandma, who had long +been anxious for an opportunity of "giving Charlotte Ann a piece of +her mind." + +Mother, who was more discreet, very wisely advised her not to +interfere with the arrangements of her daughter-in-law. "It would do +no good," she said, "and might possibly make matters worse." Unlike +most old people, grandma was not very much set in her own way, and to +mother's suggestion, she replied that "Mebby she shouldn't say +anything--'twould depend on how many airs Charlotte put on." + +To me the expected visit was a sore trial; for, notwithstanding my +cheeks and neck were rounder and fuller than they had ever been, my +head, with its young crop of short, stiff hair, was a terrible +annoyance, and more than once I had cried as I saw in fancy the +derisive smile with which my dreaded Aunt Charlotte was sure to greet +me. At last sister Anna, who possessed a great deal of taste in such +matters, and who ought to have been a milliner, contrived for the +"picked chicken," as she called me, a black lace cap, which fitted me +so well, and was so vastly becoming, that I lost all my fears, and +childlike, began to count the days which must elapse before I could +wear it. + +Meantime, in the kitchen there was a loud rattling of dishes, a +beating of eggs, and calling for wood, with which to heat the great +brick oven, grandma having pronounced the stove unfit for baking a +Thanksgiving dinner. From the cornfield, behind the barn, a golden +pumpkin, four times larger than my head and about the same color, was +gathered, and after being brought to the house, was pared, cut open, +scraped, and sliced into a little tin kettle with a copper bottom, +where for hours it stewed and sputtered, filling the atmosphere with +a faint, sickly odor, which I think was the main cause of the severe +headache I took to bed with me. Mother, on the contrary, differed +from me, she associated it in some way with the rapid disappearance +of the raisins, cinnamon, sugar, and so forth, which in sundry brown +papers, lay open upon the table. She was generally right when she +made up her mind, so I shall not dispute the point, for, let the +cause have been what it would, it was a very sick little girl which, +the night before Thanksgiving, was put early to bed by Sally, who +remarked as she undressed me, that "I was _slimpsy_ as a rag, and she +wouldn't wonder if I had a _collapse_," adding, as she tucked the +clothes around me, that "if I did, it would be mighty apt to go hard +with me." + +The next morning, just as the first gray streaks of daylight were +appearing in the east, I awoke, finding, to my great joy, that my +headache was gone. Rising upon my elbow and leaning far out of bed, +I pushed aside the striped curtain which shaded the window, and +looking out upon the ground below, saw, to my utter dismay, that it +was covered with snow. To me there is nothing pleasant in a snow +storm, a snow bank, or a snow cloud; and when a child, I used to +think that with the fall of the first flake, there came over my +spirits a chill, which was not removed until the springtime, when, +with its cause, it melted away: and even now, when, with my rubber +boots, I dare brave any drift, not more than five feet four inches +high, I cannot say that I have any particular love for snow; and as +from my window I watch the descent of the feathery flakes, I always +feel an irresistible desire to make at them wry faces, my favorite +method of showing my dislike. On the morning of which I have spoken, +I vented my displeasure in the usual way, and then I fell into a deep +sleep, from which I was at last awakened by the loud shouts of my +brothers, who, in the meadow across the road, were pelting each other +with balls, occasionally rolling over in the pure, white snow, which +they hailed as an old and well loved friend. + +Not long after breakfast was over, Anna commenced dressing Lizzie and +Carrie, and as she had herself to beautify before the arrival of the +train which was to bring my uncle and aunt, it is not surprising that +she hurried rather faster than was wholly agreeable to the little +girls, who could see no good cause for such haste, even if Herbert +Langley, my aunt's son and a youth of seventeen, was to accompany +her. I, however, who was older, read things differently, and when +Anna pulled Lizzie's curly hair, and washed Carrie's nose up instead +of down, until they both cried, and when she herself stood before the +glass a whole half hour arranging just in front of her ears two _spit +curls_, sometimes called "_beau catchers_," I shrugged my shoulders, +wondering if she thought a city boy would care for her. + +The morning train from Boston was due about ten o'clock, and as +Meadow Brook did not then boast a daily omnibus, it was necessary +that some one should be at the dépôt in order to meet our expected +guests. In New England it is almost an unheard-of thing for an +entire family to remain away from church on Thanksgiving Day, but +considering all the circumstances, it was, on this occasion, decided +orthodox for us to do so, and accordingly at nine o'clock father and +old sorrel started for the dépôt, which was distant about two and a +half miles. Long and wearisome to us children was that waiting for +his return; for stiff and prim, as starched white aprons, best gowns, +and hemstitched pantalets could make us, we sat in a row like so many +automatons, scarcely daring to move, lest we should displace some +article of dress. In the best chamber, the room which Aunt Charlotte +was to occupy, a cheerful wood fire was burning, and at least a dozen +times did grandma go up there to see if all were right, now smoothing +the clean, linen pillow-case, now moving the large easy-chair a +little more to the center of the room, and again wiping from the +mirror some imaginary specks of dust. + +As she was coming down the twelfth time, the sound of sleigh-bells +took us all to the window, where, instead of the costly furs and rich +velvet wrappings of Aunt Charlotte, we saw the coarse plaid shawl and +dark delaine hood of Aunt Betsey, while at her side was the shaggy +overcoat and sealskin cap of her better half, Uncle Jason. This +worthy couple, good enough in their way, lived in Union, about nine +miles from Meadow Brook, where, for the last ten years, they had been +in the habit of spending Thanksgiving, without ever seeming to think +it possible for them to return the compliment. Although we had never +seen Aunt Charlotte, we knew full well that there was nothing in +common between her and Aunt Betsey, and after a long consultation it +had been decided not to invite the latter, who, as it proved, did not +deem an invitation necessary. + +Uncle Jason was my father's half-brother, and the stepson of grandma, +who, the moment she saw them was actually guilty of the exclamation, +"Good Lord! what sent them here?" Before any of us could reply, the +door burst open, and the loud, boisterous laugh of Uncle Jason +greeted our ears, intermingled with the squeaky tones of Aunt Betsey, +who, addressing my mother, said, "How d'ye dew, Fanny. You pretty +well? I s'pose you're lookin' for us, though you didn't send us no +invite? Jason kinder held off about comin', but I telled him 'twas +enough sight easier to eat dinner here than to cook it to hum." + +With as good a grace as she could possibly assume, mother returned +her greeting, and then, taking her into her own bedroom, asked her to +remove her bonnet, at the same time telling her she was expecting +Uncle Joseph and Aunt Charlotte from Boston. + +"Now, you don't 'say it," exclaimed Aunt Betsey, stopping for a +moment in the adjustment of her cap, the fashion of which was +wonderful, having been devised by herself, as were all her articles +of dress. "Now, dew tell if that puckerin' thing is a comin'! How +nipped up we shall have to be! I'm so glad I wore this gown!" she +continued, looking complacently at her blue and white plaid, the +skirt of which was very short and scanty, besides being trimmed at +the bottom with two narrow ruffles. + +With her other peculiarities Aunt Betsey united that of jealousy, and +after getting herself warm, and looking round, as was her custom, she +commenced with, "Now, if I won't give up--a fire in the parlor +chamber. I s'pose Charlotte's too good to pull off her things in the +bedroom, as I do. Wall, it's the luck of some to be born with a +silver spoon in their mouth." + +Grandma, who was the only person present except myself, made no +answer, and after a moment Aunt Betsey continued, "Now I think on't, +Miss Lee (she never addressed her as 'mother,' for, from the first, a +mutual dislike had existed between them), now I think on't, Miss Lee, +mebby Fanny meant to slight me." + +"Fanny never slighted anybody," was grandma's reply, while her +polished knitting-needles rattled with a vengeance. + +"Wall, I guess she thought Jo's wife and I wouldn't hitch hosses +exactly, but the land knows that I don't care the snap of my finger +for her. I'm as good as anybody, if I don't keep a hired maid and +have a carpet on every floor." + +Here she was interrupted by the sound of horses' feet, and rising up, +grandma said, "I guess they've come. Will you go and meet them?" + +"Not _I_; I'm the last one to creep, I can tell you," was Aunt +Betsey's reply, while grandma and I quitted the room, leaving her +sitting bolt upright, with her feet on the fender and her lips pursed +up as they always were when she was indignant. + +Uncle Joseph, Aunt Charlotte, Herbert Langley, had all come, and as +the latter leaped upon the ground and I caught a sight of his tall, +slender figure, I involuntarily exclaimed, "Long-legs," a cognomen, +which he ever after retained in our family. Shaking down his pants, +he went through with a kind of shuffle not wholly unlike the Highland +fling, ending his performance by kissing his hand to the group of +noses pressed close against the window-pane. + +"I shall like him," was my mental comment, as I turned from him +towards the bundle of clothes which Uncle Joseph lifted from the +sleigh and deposited upon the steps, and which we supposed to be our +dreaded aunt. + +"This is perfectly horrible," were the first words which issued from +under the folds of her veil; but to what she referred I never knew. + +We all knew and loved Uncle Joseph, and for his sake my mother +conquered whatever of prejudice she felt towards his wife, who +returned her cordial welcome with the extreme end of her forefinger, +saying, when asked to sit down, "I'll go to my room immediately, if +you please." + +"Speak to the children first," suggested my uncle, and with a +muttered, "It doesn't matter," the haughty lady bowed coldly to us, +as one by one we were presented. + +When it came my turn, her small, black eyes rested longer upon me, +and the faintest derisive smile imaginable curled the corners of her +mouth. I knew that either my cap or my face had provoked that smile, +and with tears in my eyes I was turning away, when Herbert Langley +caught me in his long arms, exclaiming, "And so, this is Rosa, the +poetess. I mean to call you little 'Crop-head,' may I?" + +He referred, I suppose, to a letter which I had once written in rhyme +to my Uncle Joseph, but before I could frame any reply, his mother +said scornfully, "Don't be flattered, child--Herbert calls everything +poetry that rhymes. He'll learn to discriminate better as he grows +older," and with a stately sweep she left the room, saying as she +reached the rather steep and narrow staircase, "Dear me--how +funny--it's like mounting a ladder." + +While she was making her toilet we had an opportunity of learning +something of Herbert, who, whether he were so or not, seemed much +pleased with everything around him. Occasionally, however, I doubted +his sincerity, for when Aunt Betsey was presented to him, he appeared +quite as much delighted with her as with anything else, drawing his +chair closely to her side, and asking her numberless questions about +the best modes of making cheese and raising chickens, while all the +time there was a peculiarly quizzical expression in his eyes, which +were dark and very handsome, saving that the lids were too red to +suit my ideas of beauty. To Anna and her _spit-curls_ he took +kindly, and ere his lady mother made her appearance a second time he +had put his arm around her twice, telling her she should come to +Boston sometime and go to school. A rustle of silk upon the stairs +announced the descent of Aunt Charlotte, and with her nose slightly +elevated, ready for any emergency, she entered the parlor, where she +was introduced to Aunt Betsey, who, courtesying straight down, "hoped +to see her well," adding, that she "s'posed she'd come to the country +to see how poor folks lived." + +Falling back into the rocking-chair which Anna brought for her, Aunt +Charlotte made no particular reply, save an occasional attack upon +her hartshorn. Aunt Betsey, however, nothing daunted, endeavored to +engage her in conversation by asking if "she knew Liza Ann Willcott, +a tailoress girl, that boarded with a Miss Johnson, who used to live +in Union, but who now lived in Boston." + +Frowning majestically, Aunt Charlotte replied that she had not the +honor of Miss Willcott's acquaintance, whereupon Aunt Betsey advised +her to make it by all means, assuring her that "Liza Ann was a +first-rate girl, and that Miss Johnson was the best kind of a +neighbor, always willin' to _lend_, or do a good turn"---- + +Here, with a haughty toss of her head, Aunt Charlotte turned away and +began talking in a low tone to Herbert, he being the only one who, +she seemed to think, was at all worth noticing. It is strange how +much constraint one person can sometimes throw over a room full. On +this occasion, had an ogress suddenly alighted in our midst, we could +not have been more silent or less at ease than we were with that +Boston lady, sitting there so starched and stiff, her fat hands +folded one over the other, and the tips of her satin gaiters just +visible from beneath the ample folds of her rich silk dress. Even +Uncle Joseph, whose genial nature usually shed so much sunlight over +our circle, was grave and reserved, rarely venturing a remark, or, if +he did, glancing at his wife to see if she approved it. Uncle Jason, +who painfully felt his own awkwardness, sat tipped back in his chair +against the wall, with his feet on the rounds, while his fingers kept +time to a tune, which he was evidently whistling to himself. Glad +were we all when finally called to dinner, the savory smell of which +had long been whetting our appetites. + +"What! dinner so soon?" said Aunt Charlotte, consulting her gold +watch, which pointed to half-past two. "I don't believe I can force +down a mouthful." + +But, spite of her belief, she _did_ manage to make way with the +contents of her well-filled plate, which was passed back a second +time to be replenished. So eager were we all to serve her that we +partially forgot Aunt Betsey, who, after waiting a while for a +potato, at last arose, and reaching half-way across the table, +secured one for herself; saying by way of apology, that "she believed +in looking out for Number One, for if she didn't nobody else would." + +So incensed was she with what she termed our neglect, that the moment +dinner was over she insisted upon going home, saying, as she bade us +good-by, that "when she went again where she wasn't wanted, she +guessed she should know it;" and adding, while two big tears dropped +from the end of her nose, that "she never s'posed she should be so +misused by folks that she'd done so much for." + +The sight of _her_ tears brought forth answering ones from me, for, +with all her peculiarities, I loved Aunt Betsey, and I remembered +that when sickness and death were among us, she had left her own home +to stay with us, ministering as far as she was able to our comfort. +Many a night had she watched with me, and though she invariably +placed the lamp so that its rays glared full in my face, though she +slept three-fourths of the time, _snoring_ so loudly as to keep me +awake, and though at the slightest change for the worse in my +symptoms she always routed the whole household, telling them, "Rosa +was lyin' now, if she ever was," thereby almost frightening me to +death, I knew that she meant well, and in my heart I liked her far +better than I did my Boston aunt, who, after bidding her +sister-in-law good-by, went back to the parlor, saying to her husband +in a tone loud enough for us to hear, "What a vulgar creature! Did +you notice her hands? Why, they are as coarse and black as a servant +girl's." + +"And she's none the worse for that," interposed grandma, warming up +in the defense of her son's wife. "She has now and then an odd +streak, but on the whole she's better than they'll average." + +After this, Aunt Charlotte relapsed into silence, which she did not +break until she overheard Herbert proposing to Anna a ride on the +morrow. Then she roused up, and while her little black eyes snapped, +she said, "I am going home to-morrow afternoon, and so are you. +Consequently, there'll be no time for a ride." + +In a twinkling, Herbert's thumb and finger went up to his nose, a +gesture which I did not then understand, but it struck me +disagreeably, and had also the effect of silencing Aunt Charlotte, +who made no further remark on the subject until they chanced to be +alone, when I, who was in the hall, heard her say, "What can induce +you to talk so much with that raw country girl? Your city friends +would laugh well if they knew it." + +Consigning his "city friends" to the care of the old gentleman +supposed to preside over the lower regions, Herbert walked off in +quest of the "raw country girl," by whose side he sat the remainder +of the evening, talking to her so low that Lizzie whispered to me her +private opinion that "they were courting." + +The next morning Aunt Charlotte did not appear at breakfast, it being +so much earlier than her usual hour of rising that she felt wholly +unequal to the task. Accordingly, though we did not wait, the table +did until ten o'clock, when, pale and languid, she came down, seeming +much disturbed to find that Herbert had coaxed Anna into going with +him to call on Aunt Betsey, to whom he had taken quite a fancy, and +who had asked him to visit her "if he didn't feel too smart." + +Darting an angry glance at her husband, she said, "How could you +suffer it?" asking at the same time if there was a hotel on the road. +Being told that there was one at Union and another half-way between +that and Meadow Brook, she seemed more disturbed than ever, eating +little or no breakfast, and announcing her intention of staying over +that day, or, at all events, until Herbert returned. Seating herself +at the window, she watched and waited, while the hours crept on and +the clock in grandma's room struck four ere the head of "old Sorrel" +was visible far down the road. Then with an eagerness wholly +incomprehensible to me, she started up, straining her eyes anxiously +in the direction of the fast approaching cutter. As it came nearer +we all observed something rather singular in the position of Herbert, +who seemed lying almost across Anna's lap, while she was driving! + +"Merciful Heavens! it's as I feared!" was Aunt Charlotte's +exclamation, as she sank upon the lounge, moaning bitterly, and +covering her face with the cushion, that she might not see the +disgrace of her only son--for Herbert was _drunk_! + +Lifting him out, my father and uncle laid him upon the settee in the +sitting-room, just where little Jamie had been laid, and my mother, +as she looked upon the senseless inebriate resting where once had +lain the beautiful, inanimate form of her youngest born, thought how +far less bitter was her cup of sorrow than was that of the half +fainting woman, who would rather, far rather, her boy had died with +the dew of babyhood upon his brow than to have seen him thus debased +and fallen. + +The story was soon told, my uncle supplying all points which Anna +could not. It seems that early in life Herbert had acquired a love +for the wine and porter which daily graced his mother's dinner-table. +As he grew older his taste increased for something stronger, until +now nothing save brandy could satisfy the cravings of his appetite. +More than once had he been brought home in a state of entire +unconsciousness, for he was easily intoxicated, it usually taking but +one glass to render him perfectly foolish, while a second was +generally sure to finish the work. These drunken fits were always +followed by resolutions of amendment, and it was now so long since he +had drank that his mother began to have strong hopes of his reform, +but these, alas! were now dashed to the ground. Unfortunately, Uncle +Jason had offered the young man a glass of cider, which immediately +awoke in its full vigor his old love for ardent spirits. Just across +the road, creaking in the November wind, hung the sign of the "Golden +Fleece," and in that direction, soon after dinner, Herbert bent his +steps, taking down at one time a tumbler two thirds full of raw +brandy. This made him very talkative and very affectionate, insomuch +that he kissed Aunt Betsey, who, as soon as she could, started him +for home. When the half-way house, called in opposition to its +neighbor "Silver Skin," was reached, Herbert insisted upon stopping +and taking another glass, which ere long rendered him so helpless +that Anna was obliged to take charge of Sorrel herself, while her +companion fell asleep, leaning his head upon her shoulder and +gradually sinking lower and lower until he rested in her lap. + +All that night he remained in the sitting-room, which in the morning +presented so sorry and disgusting an appearance that when Aunt +Charlotte for the hundredth time wished she had never come to Meadow +Brook, our whole family mentally responded a fervent Amen. Herbert, +when fully restored to consciousness, seemed heartily ashamed of +himself, crying like a girl, and winding his arms around his mother's +neck so affectionately that I did not blame her when she forgave him +and wiped away her tears. + +She might not have had much faith in his sincerity could she have +heard his conversation with Anna, whom he managed to withdraw from +the family to the recess of a distant window. Alone with her, his +manner changed, and with flashing eyes, he charged it to his mother, +who, he said, first taught him to love it by allowing him, when a +little boy, to drink the bottom of the wine glasses after dinner. + +"And if I fill a drunkard's grave," said he, "she will be to blame; +but," he added, as he saw Anna involuntarily shudder, "it shall not +be. I can reform. I _will_ reform, and you must help me do it." + +Anna looked wonderingly at him, while he continued, taking her hand +and removing from it a plain gold ring, which grandma had given her +on her fifteenth birthday, "You must let me wear this as a talisman +to protect me from evil. Whenever I am tempted I shall look at it +and be saved." + +Anna hesitated awhile, but the soft, handsome eyes of Herbert Langley +had woven around her a spell she could not break, and at last she +consented, receiving from him in return a diamond ring, which he told +her was worth two hundred dollars. When this became known to mother +she very wisely insisted on Anna's returning it, and together with +the note explaining the why and the wherefore it went back to its +owner, who immediately replied by a letter, the contents of which +were carefully kept from us all. The effect, however, was plainly +visible; for, from the time of its receipt we lost our merry, +light-hearted sister, and in her place there moved among us a sober, +listless girl, whom grandma called foolish, and whom Charlie +pronounced "lovesick." + +Herbert's letter was soon answered, but when Anna requested my father +to put it in the P.O. he refused, telling her "she should not +correspond with such a _drunken dog_." Possibly it was wrong in him +thus to address her, for kind words and persuasive arguments might +have won her to reason, but now a spirit of opposition was +roused--"Herbert was wronged--misunderstood"--so Anna thought, and +the letter which father refused to take, was conveyed by other hands, +a postscript longer than the letter itself being first added. + +After this there was no more trouble. Anna wrote regularly to +Herbert, who promptly responded; his missives always being directed +to one of Anna's schoolmates, who was just romantic enough to think +her companion _persecuted_! Gradually I was let into the secret, and +was occasionally employed to carry Anna's notes to and from the house +of her friend. I did not then consider the great wrong I was doing, +but since I have shed many a bitter tear to think that I in any way +helped to work my sister's ruin. + + + + +CHAPTER III. + +COUSIN WILL. + +If so far as the golden Californian land this book of mine shall +reach, it may, perchance, fall into the hands of some who, from their +number, can select the veritable hero, the "Cousin Will" of my story. +If so, I would ask them to think as leniently as possible of his +faults, herein recorded, for the mustached Will of California, whose +generous conduct wins the love of all, is hardly the same wild, +mischievous boy, who once kept our home in a perpetual state of +excitement. + +The tears were scarcely yet dried, which he had shed over his +mother's coffin, when he came to us, and in one corner of his green, +oval trunk, there lay a tress of soft brown hair, which he had +severed from that mother's head. He was the son of my mother's only +sister, who, on her death-bed, had committed him to the guardianship +of my father, asking him to deal gently with her wayward boy, for +beneath his faulty exterior there lay a mine of excellence, which +naught save words of love could fathom. + +Without meaning to be so, perhaps, my father was a stern, reserved +man, never seeking the confidence of his children, whose real +characters he did not understand. It is true he loved us--provided +for all our wants, and, as far as possible, strove to make us what +the children of a New England Presbyterian deacon ought to be; but he +seldom petted us, and if Carrie, with her sunny face and chestnut +curls, sometimes stole up behind him and twined her chubby arms +around his neck, he seemed ashamed to return her caress unless they +were alone. Brother Charlie he looked upon as almost incorrigible, +but if he found it hard to cope with his bold, fun-loving spirit, it +was tenfold more difficult for him to tame the mischievous Will, whom +scarcely any one could manage, but who, strange to say, was a general +favorite. + +It was night when he reached Meadow Brook, and I was in bed, but +through the closed doors I caught the sound of his voice, and in an +instant I experienced a sensation of delight, as if in him I should +find a kindred spirit. I could not wait until morning before I saw +him, and, rising softly, I groped my way down the dark stairway to a +knot-hole, which had more than once done me service when sent from +the room while my mother and her company told something I was not to +hear! He was sitting so that the light of the lamp fell full upon +his face, which, with its high, white brow, hazel eyes, and mass of +wavy hair, seemed to me the most beautiful I had ever seen. +Involuntarily I thought of my own plain features, and saying to +myself, "He'll never like me, never," I crept back to bed, wondering +if it were true that homely little girls made sometimes handsome +women. + +The next morning, wishing to produce as favorable an impression as +possible, I was an unusually long time making my toilet--trying on +one dress after another, and finally deciding upon a _white cambric_, +which I never wore except to church, or on some similar occasion. +Giving an extra brush to my hair, which had grown out darker and so +very curly that Charley called me "Snarly-pate," I started for the +breakfast-room, where the family were already assembled. + +"What upon earth has the child got on?" was grandma's exclamation as +she looked at me, both over and under her glasses, while mother bade +me "go straight back and change my dress," asking "why I had put on +my very best?" + +"Settin' her cap for _Bill_, I guess," suggested Charlie, who, +boylike, was already on terms of great intimacy with his cousin. + +More angry than grieved, I went back to my room, where I pouted for +half an hour or more. Then, selecting the worst looking dress I had, +I again descended to the dining-room where Charlie presented me to +Will, telling him at the same time "to spare all comments on my +appearance, as it made me madder than a March hare to be called ugly." + +"I don't think she's ugly. Anyway _I_ like her looks," said Will, +smiling down upon me with those eyes which have since made many a +heart beat as mine did then, for 'twas the first compliment of the +kind I had ever received. + +Will had always lived in the city, and now, anxious to see the lions +of the country at once, he proposed to Charlie a ramble over the +farm, inviting me to accompany them, which I did willingly, +notwithstanding that Charlie muttered something about "not wanting a +gal stuck along." + +In the pasture we came across "old Sorrel," whom Will said he would +ride as they did in a circus, if Charlie would only catch him. This +was an easy task, for Sorrel, suspecting no evil, came up to us quite +readily, when Will, leaping upon his back, commenced whooping and +hallooing so loudly that Sorrel's mettle was up, and for nearly an +hour he ran quite as fast as his rider could wish. But circus riding +was not Sorrel's forte, and he probably grew dizzy, for he at length +stumbled and fell, injuring his fore foot in some way, so that, to +our dismay, we found he was unable to walk without a great effort. + +"_Je-mi-my_! Won't the old gentleman rare!" said Charlie, who was +never very choice of his language. + +Will, on the contrary, seemed more concerned for the horse, bringing +water in his hat, and bathing the fast-swelling limb of the poor +animal, who appeared to be grateful for the kindness. Charlie +proposed that we should keep it a secret, but to this Will would not +listen, and in a plain, straightforward way he confessed what he had +done, and father, who saw that Sorrel was temporarily injured, +forgave him, for he could not resist the pleading of Will's dark eyes. + +This was his first day's adventure--the next one was a little +different. Finding a cow in the lane, he tried the experiment of +milking, succeeding so well that when at night Sally came in with her +half-filled pail, she declared that "Line-back was drying up, for +she'd only given a drop or so." For this and numerous other +misdemeanors Will also received absolution, but when on the second +Sabbath after his arrival he and Charlie both were missed from +church, whither they had started a full half-hour before the rest of +our family, father grew fidgety, holding his hymn-book wrong side up, +and sitting, instead of standing, during the prayer, a thing he was +never known to do before. He was very strict in the observance of +the fourth commandment, as indeed were most of the citizens of Meadow +Brook, it being an almost State Prison offense to stay away from +church on the Sabbath, or speak above a whisper until after sunset. + +By the way, I think it a mistake, this converting the Sabbath into a +day so much to be dreaded by the youthful, fun-loving members of the +family, who are not yet old enough to see the propriety of having in +reserve a Sunday face, as well as a Sunday gown. I would not have +that sacred day profaned, but I would have it divested of that gloom +with which it is too often associated in the child's mind. I would +have everything connected with it as cheerful and pleasant as +possible, and in these days of Sabbath schools and Sabbath +school-books, it seems an easy matter to make it "The day of all the +week the best." I well remember one rainy Sunday, when the whole +family were obliged to remain at home, the younger ones reciting the +Catechism to grandma, committing to memory and repeating to mother +ten verses of the fifth chapter of Matthew, and then being compelled +to sit up stiff and straight while father read to us a long +metaphysical sermon, which he interspersed and lengthened out with +remarks of his own, among which was the consoling one that "Heaven +was one eternal Sabbath." + +This was too much for Charlie, whose mind, instead of dwelling on the +words of the good divine, was sadly wandering towards a nest of young +white _pigs_, only that morning born. Turning towards me with a most +rueful face, he whispered, "Darned if I'll go there. I'll run away +first." + +Of course I laughed aloud--how could I help it; and on my saying that +"Charlie made me," we were both ordered from the room in disgrace, +which latter we bore manfully--Charlie going straight to his pigs, +while I stole up garret to a big candle-box, where, on one of my old +dresses, lay sleeping six beautiful _kittens_. + +But I am wandering from my subject, which was the time when Will and +Charlie were missing from church, and, when, to his utter +astonishment, father learned that they had gone to the consecration +of a Roman Catholic church, which had recently been erected a little +out of the village, on an eminence, where its white cross could be +seen from every point. + +Against the Catholics as a religious denomination my father was +prejudiced, and when he ascertained that his son, born of orthodox +parents and baptized in the orthodox faith, had not only run away to +their church, but had also paid twenty-five cents, the price of +admission, he was a good deal excited, and for a deacon showed +considerable temper. It was, of course, Will's doings, he having +coaxed Charlie to go by telling him of the wonderful sights there +were to be seen. + +At a late hour they came home, loitering around the barn a long time +before they ventured into the presence of my father, whom my +grandmother had somewhat appeased by telling him that "boys must sow +their wild oats sometime, and it wasn't best to be too strict with +'em, for it only made 'em act worse," adding that "the Catholics were +not the worst folks in the world, and they had just as much right to +their form of worship as we had to ours." This in a measure +mollified him, and consequently the two boys only received a long +lecture, and were debarred the privilege of going to the village, +except on Sundays, for three weeks, a punishment which annoyed Will +exceedingly. But nothing could subdue him, and the moment the three +weeks had expired he was as ready for mischief as ever. For a long +time the coming of a circus had been heralded by flaming handbills in +red and yellow, one of which Will plastered on to our great barn +door, from which conspicuous post it was removed by my father, who +conscientiously turned his back upon men and women riding on their +heads, declaring it an outrage upon all rules of propriety, and +denouncing circuses and circus-going people as utterly low and +vulgar. Thus from my earliest remembrance had I been taught, and +still my heart would throb faster, whenever, with the beat of the +drum and the sound of the bugle, the long procession swept past our +door, and more than once had I stolen to the top of the hill, whence +could be seen the floating banner and swaying canvas, watching from +afar the evil I dared not approach. + +Great, then, was my surprise, when, on the morning of the eventful +day, Will suggested that Charlie, John, Lizzie, and I should run away +in the evening and visit the "doings," as he called it. I was +shocked that he should propose my going to such a place. "It was low +and vulgar," I told him, "and no one went there but loafers and +rowdies." + +But he assured me that I was mistaken, saying that "some of our most +respectable people attended;" and then he wondered "how I was ever to +know anything unless I once in a while went to a circus, or a +theater, or something. It was perfectly ridiculous," he said, "for +father to keep us so cooped up at home. Nobody else did so. There +was Lawyer Smith's daughter, and Judge Brown's niece in Albany, who +always went, and if it didn't hurt them, it wouldn't me." + +Thus Will reasoned, persuading me at last; and just at dark, Lizzie +and I, on pretense of going to bed early, went to our room, dressed +ourselves in our best, I donning the white cambric, which I had worn +on the first day of Will's arrival, and then when we were ready, got +out upon the roof of the woodshed, which came up under our window, +descending thence by means of a ladder which Will and Charlie brought +from the barn. I had the utmost confidence in Will, and yet as I +drew near the tent, and saw the rabble, whose appearance fully +equaled my father's description, I wished myself away. Just then the +band inside struck up, and giving my fears to the winds, I pressed +forward, once involuntarily turning my head aside, as I heard a man +near the door exclaim, "Deacon Lee's children, as I live! Is the +world coming to an end?" + +Instantly my face flushed, for I felt that injustice was done to my +father, and my first impulse was to exonerate him from all blame by +explaining that we had run away; but ere I could do so Will pulled me +along, and in a moment we were in the close, heated atmosphere of the +vast arena, where were congregated more than a thousand people, of +all ages and conditions. I was confounded, for it seemed to me that +each and every one was pointing towards us the finger of scorn, and +never since have I felt so wholly degraded and ashamed as I did at +the moment of my first entrance to a circus! + +We had been but a short time seated, when Will, who had divined my +feelings, nudged my elbow, and pointing towards a group just +entering, said, "See, there's 'Squire Talbot, his wife and daughter, +Dr. Griffin, and lots more of Meadow Brook aristocracy. Now, ain't +you glad you came?" + +It was as he said, and as I saw the above mentioned individuals, some +of them professors of religion, and all of them people of the first +standing in town, I can scarcely tell how I felt. It was a sensation +of mingled pleasure, bewilderment, and perplexity. Could it be that, +after all, my father was wrong, that he was too strict with us, +debarring us from innocent amusements, for if it were proper for +members of the church to frequent such places, why was it not for me? +Now, I can answer promptly that my father was right, wholly right, +but I was puzzled then, and gradually I began to care less for being +there, and to have less fear of what father would say when he found +it out. I was growing very brave, entrenching myself behind the bad +example of those who little suspected the harm their presence was +doing. Father did not know the ways of the world, I thought, but +after being enlightened by me, I was sure he would become a convert +at once, and possibly at the next circus he would be in attendance, +but from this last idea I involuntarily shrank, thinking I could +never respect him again, were he guilty of such a thing. + +I enjoyed it vastly, all except the riding of the girl, who I fancied +had on her little sister's dress, and when she came out I looked for +a place where to hide my head; but hearing the spectators cheer +louder than ever, I cast furtive glances at those around me, +discovering to my amazement that they seemed more delighted with her +than with anything else; while, to crown all, I heard Will telling a +young man, that "she was a splendid rider, that he never saw but one +who could beat her, and that was a girl in Albany." Then turning to +Lizzie, he asked if she would not like to ride in that way? + +With an involuntary shudder I threw my arm around my sister, as if to +protect her from what I felt would be worse than a thousand deaths. +Gradually there was dawning upon my mind the suspicion that a circus +after all was not exactly the school for pure young girls, and I felt +that not all the wealth of the Indies could tempt me to fill the post +that that rider did. Towards the other actors I was more lenient, +thinking that if ever I joined the circus, I should surely be the +clown, whose witty speeches amused me greatly, for I did not then +know that they were all made up beforehand, and that what he said to +us to-day he would say to others on the morrow. Mlle. Glaraine was +just finishing up her performance by riding around the circle without +other support than the poising of one foot on a man's shoulder, when +who should appear but _our father_! + +He had missed Will and Charlie from family prayers, and had traced +them as far as the pavilion, where the fee-receiver demanded a +quarter ere he would allow him to enter. It was in vain that father +tried to explain matters, saying, "he never attended a circus in his +life, and what was more never should; he'd only come for two boys who +had run away." + +The doorkeeper was incorrigible; "he'd seen just as honest looking +men," he said, "who were the greatest cheats in the world, and if +father wanted to go in, he could do so by paying the usual fee; if +not, he must budge." + +Finding there was no alternative, father yielded, and then made his +way into the tent, scanning with his keen gray eyes the sea of faces +until he singled out Charlie, who was so absorbed in stamping and +hallooing at Mlle. Glaraine's leaping through a hoop, that he never +dreamed of father's presence until a rough hand was laid upon his +shoulder, and a stern voice demanded of him why he was there? + +Perfectly thunderstruck, Charlie started to his feet with the +exclamation of "_Je-ru-sa-lem!_" but before he could make any +explanation father discovered Lizzie and me. 'Twas the first +suspicion he had of our being there, and now, when he saw us, he +turned pale, and reeled as if smitten by a heavy blow. Had he felled +me to the earth it would have hurt me less than did the expression of +his face and the tones of his voice, as he said, "You, too, Rosa! I +never thought you would thus deceive me." + +I began to cry aloud; so did Lizzie, and in this way we made our exit +from the circus, followed by Charlie, John, and Will, the latter of +whom, the moment we were in the open air, began to take the blame all +to himself, saying, as was very true, that we never would have +thought of going but for him, and suggesting that he alone should be +punished, as he was the one most in fault. I thought this was very +magnanimous in Will, and I looked up in father's face to see how it +affected him, but the moonlight was obscure, and I could discover +nothing, though the hand that held mine trembled violently. I +presume he thought that in this case corporal punishment would be of +no avail, for we received none, but in various ways were we made to +feel that we had lost the confidence of the family. For four long +weeks we were each night locked into our rooms, while for the same +length of time we were kept from school, Lizzie and I reciting our +lessons to our mother, while Will, Charlie, and John, to use their +own words, "worked from morning until night, like niggers." + +But the worst part of it all was the temporary disgrace which our act +of disobedience brought upon father. A half-drunken fellow, who saw +him enter the tent, and who knew that we were there, hurried away to +the village with the startling intelligence that "Deacon Lee and all +his family were at the circus." + +The news spread like wildfire, gathering strength in its progress, +until by the time it reached us it was a current report that not only +was father at the circus, _grandma_ too! This was more than the old +lady could bear. Sixty-nine years had she lived without ever having +had a word breathed against her morals, and now, just as her life's +sun was setting, to have such a thing laid to her charge was too +much, and she actually worried herself into a fever, which confined +her to the house for several weeks. + +After this adventure it became a serious question in father's mind as +to what he should do with Will, who kept our heretofore quiet +household in a state of perpetual excitement. Nothing seemed to have +the least effect upon him save the mention of his mother, and that +for the time being would subdue him, but when temptation came, he +invariably yielded, and Charlie, who was an apt scholar, was pretty +sure to follow where his wild, dashing cousin led. There was +scarcely any boyish vice to which Will was not more or less addicted, +and "Deacon Lee's sons," who had often been held up as patterns for +their companions, began soon to prove the old adage true, that "evil +communications corrupt good manners." + +John learned to handle an oath quite fluently, while Charlie was one +Sunday morning discovered playing euchre with Will on the hayloft, +where they kept their cards hidden. But all this was nothing +compared to the night when both the boys were brought home so +intoxicated that neither of them was able to stand alone or speak! +They had been to a "raising," where the brandy bottle circulated +freely, Will, as a matter of course, drinking from the beginning. +Charlie, however, hesitated until they taunted him with "being afraid +of the old deacon," daring him "to drink and be a _man_." Then he +yielded, and with fiendish pleasure the crowd gathered around, urging +him on, until he was undeniably drunk; after which they chuckled with +delight as they wondered what the "blue Presbyterian" would say. We +were sitting down to supper when they brought him home, and the +moment mother saw him, she darted forward, exclaiming, "Is he dead? +Tell me, is my boy dead?" + +"Yes, _dead--drunk_," answered the man, with a cold, ironical sneer +at her distress. + +_He_ was used to it, for of five noble sons who once called him their +father, four slept in a drunkard's grave, and the fifth had far +better have been there than the wreck he was. My father had risen +from his seat, but at the words "he is drunk," he dropped upon the +floor as if scathed with the lightning's stroke. You who think it a +light matter--the holding of the wine-cup to the lips of your +neighbor's child--you should have seen my father that night, as moan +after moan of anguish came from his pale lips, while the great drops +of perspiration stood thickly upon his forehead and about his mouth. +The effect it had upon him was terrible; crushing him to the earth, +and weaving in among his hitherto brown locks more than one thread of +silver. Once when Charlie was with me, I heard him in the barn, +praying that the promise of a covenant God might be remembered +towards him, and that his son might yet be saved. Charlie's feelings +were touched, and dropping on his knees at my side he made a solemn +vow that never again should ardent spirits of any kind pass his lips; +and God, who heard that vow mingled with my father's prayer, +registered it in Heaven, and from that day to this, amid all the +temptations which come to early manhood, it has been unbroken. + +Not thus easily could Will be reached. His was the sorrow of a day, +which passed away with the coming of to-morrow's sun, and after a +long consultation, it was decided that he should go to sea, and the +next merchantman bound for the East Indies, which sailed from Boston, +bore on its deck, as a common sailor, our cousin Will, who went from +us reluctantly, for to him there was naught but terror, toil, and +fear in "a life on the ocean wave." But there was no other way to +save him, they said, and so with bitter grief at our hearts, we bade +adieu to the wayward boy, praying that God would give the winds and +waves charge concerning him, and that no danger might befall him when +afar on the rolling billow. + + + + +CHAPTER IV. + +THE SCHOOLMISTRESS. + +Of the many thousand individuals destined to become the purchasers of +a copy of this work, a majority have undoubtedly been, or are still +teachers, and of these many will remember the time when they fancied +that to be invested with the dignity of a teacher was to secure the +greatest amount of happiness which earth can bestow. Almost from my +earliest remembrance it had been the one great subject which +engrossed my thoughts, and frequently, when strolling down the shady +hillside which led to our schoolhouse, have I fancied myself the +teacher, thinking that if such were really the case, my first act +should be the chastisement of half a score or more boys, who were in +the daily habit of annoying me in various ways. Every word and +action of my teacher, too, was carefully noted and laid away against +the time when I should need them, and which came much sooner than I +anticipated; for one rainy morning when Lizzie and I were playing in +the garret, I overheard my father saying there was a chance for Rosa +to teach school. + +"What, that child!" was my mother's exclamation, but ere he could +reply, "the child" had bounded down two pair of stairs, and stood at +his elbow, asking, "Who is it?--Where is it?--And do you suppose I +can get a certificate?" + +This last idea damped my ardor somewhat, for horrible visions came up +before me, of the "Abbreviations" and "Sounds of the Vowels," in both +of which I was rather deficient. + +"_You_ teach school! You look like it!" said my sister Juliet. +"Why, in less than three days you'd be _teetering_ with the girls, if +indeed you didn't climb trees with the boys." + +This _climbing_ was undeniably a failing of mine, there being +scarcely a tree on the farm on whose topmost limbs I hadn't at some +time or other been perched; but I was _older_ now. I was _thirteen_ +two days before, and so I reminded Juliet, at the same time begging +of father to tell me all about it. It appeared that he had that day +met with a Mr. Randall, the trustee of Pine District, who was in +quest of a teacher. After learning that the school was small, father +ventured to propose me, who, he said, "was crazy to keep school." + +"A dollar a week is the most we can give her," returned Mr. Randall, +"and if you'll take up with that, mebby we'll try her. New beginners +sometimes do the best." + +So it was arranged that I was to teach fifteen weeks for four dollars +per month and board round at that! Boarding round! How many +reminiscences do these two words recall to those who, like myself, +have tried it, and who know that it has a variety of significations. +That sometimes it is only another name for sleeping with every child +in the family where your home for one week may chance to be--for how +can you be insensible to the oft-repeated whisper, "_I_ shall sleep +with her to-night--ma said I might;" and of "ma's" audible answer, +"Perhaps, _sis_, she don't want you to." + +If "sis" is a clean, chubby-looking little creature, you _do_ want +her; but if, as it not unfrequently happens, she is just the +opposite,----I draw a blank which almost every country teacher in the +land can fill, merely saying that there is no alternative. We have +got the district to please and we must do it some way or other. + +Again, "boarding round" means a quiet, cozy spot, where everything is +so pleasant and cheerful, where the words are so kind and the smile +of welcome so sweet, that you feel at once at home, and wish, oh, how +you do wish, you could stay there all the summer long; but it cannot +be;--the time of your allotted sojourn passes away, and then with a +sigh, if indeed you can repress a tear, you gather up your combs, +brushes, and little piece of embroidery, to which some spiteful woman +has said "you devote more time than to your school," and putting them +in your satchel, depart for another home, sometimes as pleasant as +the one you are leaving, sometimes not. + +But of these annoyances I knew nothing, and when Mr. Randall came to +see me, calling me _Miss Lee_, and when I was really engaged, my +happiness was complete. In a country neighborhood every item of +news, however slight, spreads rapidly, and the fact that I was to +teach soon became generally known, creating quite a sensation, and +operating differently upon different natures. One old gentleman, +who, times innumerable, had held me on his knee, feeding my vanity +with flattery, and my stomach with sweetmeats, was quite as much +delighted as I, declaring, "he always knew I was destined to make +something great." + +Dear old man! When the snows of last winter were high piled upon the +earth, they dug for him a grave in the frozen ground, and in the +world where now he lives, he will not know, perhaps, that I shall +never fulfil his prophesy. + +Aunt Sally Wright, who, besides managing her own affairs, kept an eye +on her neighbors', and who looked upon me as a "pert, forward piece," +gave her opinion freely. "What! That young one keep school! Is +Deacon Lee crazy? Ain't Rose stuck up enough now? But never mind. +You'll see she won't keep out more'n half her time, if she does that." + +Aunt Sally was gifted with the power of telling fortunes by means of +tea-grounds, and I have always fancied she read that prediction in +the bottom of her big blue cup, for how could she otherwise have +known what actually happened! Ere long the news cached Pine +District, creating quite an excitement, the older people declaring +"_they'd_ never send to a little girl," while the juvenile portion of +the inhabitants gave a contemptuous whistle or so in honor of the +school ma'am elect. Mrs. Capt. Thompson, who boasted the biggest +house, handsomest carpet and worst boy in Pine Hill, was wholly +incredulous until she one day chanced to meet with Aunt Sally, who +not only confirmed it, but also kindly gave her many little items +touching my character as a "wild, romping minx, who was no more +qualified for a teacher than for the Queen of England," citing as a +proof of what she said, that only the year before she had seen me +"trying to ride on a cow." + +Mrs. Capt. Thompson, who was blessed with an overwhelming sense of +propriety, was greatly shocked, saying "she'd always thought Mr. +Randall knew just enough to hire a child," and consoling herself with +the remark that "it was not at all probable I'd get a certificate." + +On this point I was myself a little fearful. True, I had been "sent +away" to school, and had been flattered into the belief that I +possessed far more book knowledge than I did; but this, I knew, would +avail me nothing with the formidable committee who held my destiny in +their hands. _They_ were unbiased in my favor, and had probably +never heard of me, as they lived in an adjoining town. But "where +there's a will there's a way," and determining not to fail, I +ransacked the cupboard, where our school-books were kept, bringing +thence Olney's Geography, Colburn's Arithmetic, History of the United +States, Grammars, etc., all of which were for days my constant +companions, and I even slept with one or more of them under my +pillow, so that with the earliest dawn I could study. Whole pages of +Geography were committed to memory, all the hardest problems in +Colburn were solved, a dozen or more of compound relatives were +parsed and disposed of to my satisfaction at least, and I was just +beginning to feel strong in my own abilities when one Monday morning +news was brought us that at three o'clock that afternoon all who were +intending to teach in the town of S---- were to meet at the house of +the Rev. Mr. Parks, then and there to be questioned of what they knew +and what they didn't know. This last referred to me, for now that +the dreaded day had come, I felt that every idea had suddenly left +me, while, to increase my embarrassment, I was further informed that +as there had the year previous been some trouble among the School +Inspectors, each of whom fancied that the other did not take his +share of the work, the town had this year thought to obviate the +difficulty by electing nine! + +One was bad enough, but at the thought of nine men in spectacles my +heart sank within me, and it was some time ere I could be persuaded +to make the trial. In the midst of our trouble, Aunt Sally, whose +clothes on Monday mornings were always swinging on the line before +light, and who usually spent the afternoon of that day in visiting, +came in, and after learning what was the cause of my flushed cheeks, +said, by way of comforting me, that "she didn't wonder an atom if I +felt streaked, for 'twant no ways likely I'd pass!" + +This roused my pride, and with the mental comment that "I'd _pass_ +for all her," I got myself in readiness, Juliet lending me her green +veil, and Anna her fine pocket-handkerchief, while mother's soft warm +shawl was wrapped lovingly about me, and Lizzie slipped into my +pocket the _Multiplication Table_, which she thought I might manage +to look at slily in case of an emergency. On our way father +commenced the examination by asking me the length of the Mississippi, +but I didn't know as it had a length, and in despair he gave up his +questioning. + +Oh, how somber and dreary seemed the little parlor into which we were +ushered by the servant, who, on learning our business, looked rather +doubtfully at me, as much as to say, "_You_ surely can't be one of +them?" In a short time the parlor was filled, the entire _nine_ +being there. Not one was absent, and in a row directly opposite, +they sat, some tipped back in a lounging attitude, some cutting their +finger nails with their penknives, while others sat up stiff and +stern, the whole presenting a most formidable appearance. There were +eight or ten candidates present, and unfortunately for me, I was +seated at what I called the foot of the class. It seemed that the +most of them were acquainted, and as I was almost the only stranger +present, it was but natural that they should look at me rather more +than I liked. My pantalets evidently attracted their attention, but +by dint of drawing up my feet and pushing down my dress I hoped to +hide my _short_-comings. + +When, at last, the examination commenced, I found, to my great +delight, that Geography was the subject introduced, and my heart beat +high, for I thought of the pages I could repeat and ardently longed +for a chance to display! Unfortunately for me they merely questioned +us from the map, and breathlessly I awaited my turn. At length the +young lady who sat next to me was asked "What two rivers unite and +form the Ohio?" I looked at her sidewise. The bloom deepened on her +cheek, and I was sure she had forgotten. Involuntarily I felt +tempted to tell her, but did not, and Mr. Parks, looking inquiringly +at me, said, "Perhaps the next one can. Ahem!" + +He caught sight of my offending pantalets, and thinking me some child +who had come with her sister, was about to pass me by. But I was not +to be slighted in that way, particularly when I knew the answer; so, +with the air of one who, always at the foot, accidentally spells a +word right and starts for the head, I spoke out loud and distinctly +"Alleghany and Monongahela," glancing at my father just in time to +catch a nod of encouragement. + +"The Nine" were taken by surprise, and instantly three pair of eyes +with glasses and six pair without glasses were brought to bear upon +me. For reasons best known to themselves, they asked me a great +variety of questions, all of which I answered correctly, I believe; +at least they made no comment, and were evidently vastly amused with +their new specimen, asking me how old I was, and exchanging smiles at +my reply, "Thirteen, four weeks ago to-day." One of my +fellow-teachers, who sat near me, whispered to her next neighbor, +"She's older than that, I know;" for which remark I've never quite +forgiven her. Arithmetic was the last branch introduced, and as +mathematics was rather my forte, I had now no fears of failing--but I +did! A question in Decimals puzzled me, and coloring to my temples, +I replied "I don't know," while two undeniable tears dropped into my +lap. + +"Never mind, sis," said one of the nine. "You know most everything +else, and have done bravely." + +I was as sure of my certificate then as I was fifteen minutes +afterwards, when a little slip of paper was given me, declaring me +competent to teach a common school. I thought it was all over, and +was adjusting mother's shawl and tying on Juliet's veil, when they +asked me to write something that they might see a specimen of my +penmanship. Taking the pen, I dashed off with a flourish "Rosa Lee," +at which I thought they peered more curiously than need be--and one +of them, Dr. Clayton, a young man, and a handsome one, too, said +something about its being "very poetical." He hadn't seen the _negro +song_ then. + +The shadows of evening had long since fallen when we stopped at our +door, where we found mother anxiously waiting for us. Very wistfully +she looked in my face ere she asked the important question. + +"Yes, I've got one," said I, bounding from the buggy, "and I'd like +to be examined every day, it's such fun." + +"Didn't you miss a word?" asked Juliet. + +"Oh, I'm so glad!" cried Lizzie. + +"Feel _big_, don't you?" suggested Charlie, while Anna inquired "if +I'd lost her pocket-handkerchief!" + + + + +CHAPTER V. + +PINE HILL. + +Ere long, exaggerated rumors reached Meadow Brook of the very +creditable manner in which I had acquitted myself at the examination, +whereupon Aunt Sally Wright was quite taken aback. Soon rallying, +however, she had recourse to her second prediction, which was that "I +should not teach more than half the summer out." Perhaps I wrong the +old lady, but I cannot help thinking that the ill-natured stories +concerning myself, which she set afloat at Pine Hill, were in a great +measure the cause of her prophecy being fulfilled. Never before, to +my knowledge, had she visited at Captain Thompson's, but now she +spent an entire day there, bringing back to us the intelligence that +John Thompson, a boy just one year my senior, was going to stay at +home that summer, as "Miss Cap'n Thompson hadn't no idee I could +teach him." + +Added to this was the comforting assurance, that "Cap'n Thompson was +hoppin' mad because Mr. Randall had hired me in preference to his +sister _Dell_, who had herself applied for the school." This, as I +afterwards learned, was the secret of the dislike which, from the +first, the Thompsons entertained for me. They had no daughter, but +the captain's half sister Dell had lived with him ever since his +marriage, and between her and their hopeful son John, the affections +of himself and wife were nearly equally divided. + +Dell Thompson was a proud, overbearing girl, about eighteen years of +age, who esteemed herself far better than her neighbors, with whom +she seldom associated, her acquaintances living mostly at what was +called "the Centre" of the town. It seems that she had applied for +the summer school, but remembering that she had once called him a +"country clown and his wife ignorant and vulgar," Mr. Randall had +refused her and accepted me. Notwithstanding that the people of Pine +Hill generally disliked the Thompsons, there was among them a feeling +of dissatisfaction when it became known that I was preferred to Dell, +who, they thought, would have given _tone_ and _character_ to the +school, for "it wasn't every _big bug_ who would stoop to teach." + +Of this state of affairs I was fortunately ignorant, and never do I +remember a happier morning than that on which I first took upon +myself the responsibilities of a teacher. By sunrise, the little +hair trunk, which grandma lent me, was packed and stood waiting on +the doorstep, where I had carried it, thinking thus to accelerate the +movements of my father, who did not seem to be in any particular +hurry, telling me, "he'd no idea that school would be commenced +before we got there!" Grandma had suggested the propriety of letting +down my dresses, a movement which I warmly seconded, but mother said +"No, she did not like to see little girls dressed like grown-up +women;" so, in my new plaid gingham and white pantalets, I waited +impatiently until the clock struck seven, at which time father +announced himself ready. + +"When will you come home?" asked mother, as she followed me to the +gate. + +"In three weeks," was my reply, as I bounded into the buggy, which +soon moved away. + +Pine Hill is not at all remarkable for its beautiful scenery, and as +old Sorrel trotted leisurely along, down one steep hill and up +another, through a _haunted_ swamp, where a man had once, to his +great terror, seen his departed wife, and over a piece of road, where +the little grassy ridges said, as plain as grassy ridges could say, +that the travelers there were few and far between, my spirits lowered +a little. But, anon, the prospect brightened, and in the distance we +saw the white walls of Captain Thompson's residence gleaming through +the mass of evergreens which surrounded it. This, however, soon +disappeared, and for a mile or more my eye met with nothing save +white birches, gray rocks, green ferns, and blackberry bushes, until +suddenly turning a corner, we came to a halt before one of those +slanting-roofed houses so common in New England. It was the home of +Mr. Randall, and it was there that I was to board the first week. In +the doorway, eating bread and molasses, were his three children, who, +the moment they saw us, set up a shout of "somebody's come. I guess +it's the schoolma'am!" and straightway they took to their heels as if +fleeing from the presence of a tigress. + +After a moment, the largest of them ventured to return, and his +example was soon followed by the other two, the younger of whom, +after eying me askance, lisped out, "Don Thompthon thays he ain't +afraid of you; he can lick you like _dunder_!" + +This was a pleasant commencement, but I smiled down upon the little +boy, patting his curly head, while father inquired for Mrs. Randall, +who, we learned, was sweeping the schoolhouse. Leaving the hair +trunk, which was used by the children for a horse ere we left the +yard, we again set forward, and soon reached our place of +destination, which, without shade-tree or ornament of any kind, stood +half-way up a long, sunny hill, commanding a view of nothing save the +weathercock of Captain Thompson's barn, which was visible across the +orchard opposite. We found Mrs. Randall enveloped in a cloud of +dust, her sleeves rolled up, and her head covered by a black silk +handkerchief. + +"The room, wasn't fit for the pigs," she said, "and ought to have +been cleaned, but somehow nobody took any interest in school this +summer, and I'd have to make it answer." + +I didn't care particularly for the room, which, in truth, was dirty +and disagreeable enough, but the words "nobody took any interest this +summer," affected me unpleasantly, for in them I saw a dim +foreshadowing of all that ensued. Father, who was in a hurry, soon +left me, bidding me "be a good girl, and not get to _romping_ with +the scholars." From the window I watched him until he disappeared +over the sandy hill, half wishing, though I would not then confess +it, that I and the little trunk were with him. I was roused from my +reverie by Mrs. Randall, who, for some time, had been looking +inquisitively at me, and who now said, "Ain't you but thirteen?" + +"No, ma'am," I answered. + +"Wall," she returned, "it beats all how much older you look. I +should s'pose you was full sixteen, if not more. But it's all in +your favor, and I guess you'll be more likely to suit the deestrict, +though they're afraid you haven't any government, and they're +terrible hard to suit. So, if I's you," she continued, "I'd hold a +pretty tight rein at first. I give you full liberty to whip my young +ones if they don't behave. They know better than to complain at +home." + +Involuntarily I glanced at the clump of alders which grew near the +house, and if they were somewhat diminished ere my reign was over, +the "Deestrict" owed it to Mrs. Randall's suggestion. After sitting +awhile, she arose to go, telling me "she should expect me at night," +and then I was alone. I looked at my watch; it was half-past eight, +and not a scholar yet. This was widely different from Meadow Brook, +where, by seven, the house was generally filled with children, +hallooing, quarreling over seats, and watching eagerly for the first +sight of "the new schoolma'am." Here the tables were turned, and +"the schoolma'am" was watching for her scholars! + +Suddenly a large bumble-bee came buzzing in, and alighted on a window +opposite. Like Sir Thomas the Good, in the Ingoldsby Legends, I have +a passion for capturing insects, especially white-faced bumble-bees, +and now I felt strongly inclined to mount the desks in pursuit of the +intruder, but the thought "What if the scholars should detect me?" +prevented, and, to this day, I have never known whether that +bumble-bee had a _white_ face, or belonged to the class of colored +brethren! Ten minutes of nine, and I began to grow fidgety. I +should have been more so, had I known how much is sometimes said +about teachers not keeping their hours. Five minutes of nine, and +round the corner at the foot of the hill appeared a group of +children, while from another direction came others, shouting for +those in advance to "wait," which they did, and the whole entered the +house together. A few of the girls made a slight obeisance, while +the boys laughed, and throwing down their books in a very +consequential manner, looked distrustfully at me. My age had +preceded me, and in many of these childish hearts there was already a +spirit of rebellion. + +Here I would speak against the impropriety of discussing a teacher's +faults in the presence of pupils, who will discover them soon enough. +Many a teacher starts disadvantageously because of some idle tale, +which may or may not be true, but which, borne on the wings of +gossip, reaches its place of destination, and is there thoughtlessly +canvassed in the hearing of children, who thus become prejudiced +against a person they have never seen, and whom they otherwise might +have liked. In my case, the fault was _my age_, which had evidently +been discussed in the neighborhood; for, on opening my desk, I found +inscribed upon the lid, in a bold schoolboy style, "Rosa Lee, aged +13," to which was appended, in a more delicate hand, "Ancient--very!" + +Taking my India-rubber, I erased it while my scholars were settling +the matter of seats, which, strange to say, they did without +disputing. Then there ensued a perfect silence, and the eyes of all +present turned inquiringly upon me, while, with sundry flourishes +with my silver pencil, I proceeded to take down upon a big sheet of +foolscap the names, ages, and "what studies do you intend to pursue?" +of my pupils. After much talking and arranging, the school was +organized; but the first morning dragged heavily, and when 12 o'clock +came, and I drew from my satchel the nice ginger snaps which mother +had made, the sight of them, or the taste, or something else, choked +me so much that I was obliged to wink hard, and count the rows of +trees in the orchard opposite twice, ere I could answer the question +addressed to me by one of the little girls. + +In the rear of the house was a long strip of dense woods, and wishing +to be alone and out of sight of the sports in which I felt I must not +join, I took my bonnet and wandered thither. Seating myself upon a +mossy log, I tried to fancy that I was at home beneath the dear old +grapevine, the faintest rustle of whose broad green leaves would, at +that moment, have been to me like the sweetest music. But it could +not be. I was a schoolmistress--_Miss Lee_, they called me, and on +my brow the shadows of life were thus early making their impress. +Slowly to me dragged the hour which always before had been so short, +and when at last I took my way back to school, it seemed that in that +short space I had lived an age. Often since, when I have looked upon +young teachers hastening to their task, I've pitied them, for I knew +full well how long and wearisome would be their first day's labor. + +As I approached the schoolhouse I saw that something was the matter, +for the scholars were greatly excited, and with voices raised to the +highest pitch, were discussing something of importance. Thinking +that my presence would perhaps restrain them from such noisy +demonstrations, I hastened forward, but the babel rather increased +than diminished, and it was with difficulty that I could learn the +cause of the commotion. George Randall was crying, while a little +apart from him stood two boys, one of them apparently fourteen and +the other twelve. They were strangers to me, and instinctively I +felt that they were in some way connected with the disturbance; and +that the larger and more important looking was _John Thompson_, a +surmise which proved to be correct. + +It seemed that Isaac Ross, one of the newcomers, had some weeks +before selected for himself a corner seat, which, as he was not +present in the morning, had been taken by George Randall, who knew +nothing of Isaac's intentions, and who now refused to give it up. A +fight was the result, the most of the scholars taking sides with +George, while Isaac was urged on and encouraged by John Thompson, +who, though not a pupil, had come up "to see how he liked the +schoolma'am." As a matter of course an appeal was made to me, to +know "if George hadn't the best right to the seat." + +Perhaps I was wrong, but I decided that he had, at the same time +asking Isaac "if he were coming to school." + +"I ain't goin' to do anything else," said he, glancing towards John, +who, with a wicked leer at me, knocked off one of the little boys' +hats and then threw it up in the air. + +What would have ensued next I do not know, for at that moment Captain +Thompson rode round the corner and called to his son, who, with mock +deference, bowed politely to me and walked away. Disagreeable as +Isaac Ross appeared in the presence of John Thompson, I found that +when left to himself he was quite a different boy, and though he at +first manifested some reluctance to taking another seat, he at last +yielded the point, and for the remainder of the day conducted himself +with perfect propriety. + +On the whole the afternoon passed away rather pleasantly, and at +night, when school was out, I started for my boarding-place quite +contented with teachers generally, and myself in particular. In +passing the different houses which stood upon the roadside, I +demeaned myself with the utmost dignity, swinging my short dress from +side to side in imitation of a Boston lady who had once taught in our +district, and whose manner of walking I greatly admired! From the +window of Captain Thompson's dwelling I caught a glimpse of two +faces, which were hastily withdrawn, but I felt sure that from behind +the curtains they were scanning my appearance, and I remember +lowering my parasol a little, just to tantalize them! But when at +last I was over the hill and out of sight, oh, how glad I was to be +"Rosa Lee" again, free to pluck the sweet, wild flowers, to watch the +little fishes in the running brook, or even to chase a white-faced +bumble-bee if I liked. + +About fifty rods from Mr. Randall's stands one of those +old-fashioned, gable-roofed houses, so common in some parts of New +England, and here, at the time of which I am speaking, lived Mrs. +Ross, the mother of Isaac, or _Ike_, as he was familiarly called. I +had never met the lady, but as I approached the house and saw a tall, +square-shouldered woman leaning on a gate, I naturally thought that +it might be she; and on this point I was not long left in doubt, for +the moment I came within speaking distance, she called out, "How dy' +do, Miss Lee--I s'pose 'tis? You pretty well? I'm Miss Ross, +Isick's mother. He telled me that he had some fuss about a seat that +he picked out more'n a month ago, and thinks he orto have. I don't +never calkerlate to take sides with my children, 'cause I've kept +school myself, and I know how bad 'tis, but I do hate to have Isick +git a miff again the schoolma'am on the first start, and if I's you +I'd let him have the seat instead of George Randall, for mebby +folks'll say you're partial to George, bein' that his father's +committee-man, and I've kept school enough to know that _partiality_ +won't do." + +As well as I could, I explained the matter to her, telling her I +wished to do right, and meant to as far as I knew how. + +"I presume you do," said she, "or I shouldn't a' taken the liberty to +speak to you. I knew you's young, and I felt afeard you didn't know +what an undertakin' it was to teach the young idee how to _shute_. +The schoolma'ams have always thought a sight of me, and generally +tell me all their troubles, so I know jest how to take their part +when the rest of the folks are again 'em. Was Susan Brown to school? +But she wasn't though, I know she wasn't." + +I replied that there was a little girl present of that name, and my +companion continued: "Now I'll give up, if Miss Brown has come round +enough to send, when she was so dreadfully opposed to your teachin'; +you've heerd about it, I s'pose?" + +I answered that "I didn't know that any one had opposed me except +Mrs. Thompson." + +"Oh, yes," said she, assuming an injured look and tone. "Everybody +knows about that, and there's some sense in their bein' mad, for +'twas plaguy mortifyin' to Dell to offer to teach and be rejected by +Mr. Randall, a man that none of the Thompsons would wipe their old +shoes on, and then, 'tisn't every _big bug_ that would stoop to +teach, for you know 'tain't considered fust cut." + +"No, I didn't know it," and so I said, but she assured me of the +fact, quoting as authority, both Mrs. Thompson and Dell, who, I +found, were her oracles in everything. After a time I brought her +back to Mrs. Brown, whose husband, she said, was gone to sea, and who +had herself applied for the school. + +"But between you and me," she added, speaking in a whisper, "it's a +mighty good thing that she didn't get it, for she ain't the likeliest +person that ever was, and nobody under the sun would have sent to +her. Isick shouldn't a' gone a single day, for her morals is very +bad. She used to belong to the Orthodox Church, but they turned her +out for dancin' at a party, and when she lived in Wooster she jined +the 'Piscopals, who, you know, let their members cut up all +sorts--but, land sakes! how I'm talkin'! You must not breathe a word +I say, for I make it a pint not to slander my neighbors, and if +everybody minded their own business as well as I do, there wouldn't +be so much back-bitin' as there is. And that makes me think I've +half a mind to caution you--but no, I guess I won't--mebby you'll +tell on't." + +Of course my curiosity was roused, and of course I said I wouldn't +tell; whereupon she proceeded to inform me that Mrs. Randall was a +very talkin' woman, and I must be pretty careful in her presence. +"You can tell me anything you wish to," said she, "for I'm a master +hand to keep a secret; but Miss Randall is forever in hot water. She +and Miss Brown are hand in glove, and both on 'em turn up their noses +at Miss Thompson and Dell, who never pretend to make anything of 'em. +I'm considerable _intimate_ at the Captain's, and I know all about +it. Dell is smart as a steel trap, and it's a pity she's took such a +dislike to you." + +"I don't think she ought to blame me," said I, "for I didn't know as +she wanted the school"---- + +"'Tain't that altogether," resumed Mrs. Ross, again speaking in a +whisper. "'Tain't that altogether, and it you'll never lisp a word +on't I'll tell you the hull story." + +I gave the required promise, and then Mrs. Ross proceeded to inform +me that Dell was jealous of me. + +"Jealous!" I exclaimed. "How can that be?" + +"You remember Dr. Clayton, don't you?" said she. + +"Yes, I remember him, but what has he to do with Miss Thompson's +being jealous of me!" + +"Why," returned Mrs. Ross, "Dell's kinder settin' her cap for him, +and I guess he's a snickerin' notion after her. Any way he comes +there pretty often. Well, he was there the week after the +examination, and told 'em about you. He said you was bright as a new +guinea, and had better larnin' than half the teachers, and then you +had such u sweet name--_Rose_--he liked it. You orto have seen how +mad Dell was at you after he was gone. I don't believe she'll ever +git over it." + +Here Ike called out that "the Johnny-cake was burnt blacker than his +hat," and forth with Mrs. Ross started for the house, first bidding +me "keep dark," and telling me she hoped "I wouldn't be partial to +Mr. Randall's children, for they needed lickin' if ever young ones +did--they warn't brought up like Isick, who was governed so well at +home that he didn't need it at school." + +I was learning to read the world's great book fast--very fast--and +with a slightly heavy heart I turned away, pausing once while Mrs. +Ross, from the doorstep, called to me, saying, that "she guessed I'd +better give Isick the seat to-morrow, seein' his heart was set on't." + +I found Mrs. Randall waiting to receive me in a clean gingham dress +and apron, with her round, good-humored face shining as if it had +been through the same process with the long line of snow-white linen, +which was swinging in the clothes-yard. The little hair trunk had +been removed to the "best room," which was to be mine. The big +rocking-chair was brought out for me, the round tea-table, nicely +spread, stood in the center of the floor, and Mrs. Randall hoped I +would make myself at home, and put up with her own rough ways if I +could. To be sure, she didn't have things quite as nice as Mrs. +Captain Thompson, but she did as well as she knew how. Dear Mrs. +Randall! how my heart warmed towards her; and as I took my seat at +the table, and she helped me to a larger slice of pure white +honeycomb than I had ever before been allowed to eat at one time, I +felt that I would not exchange her house for a home at Captain +Thompson's. + +Without any intention of revealing what Mrs. Ross had imparted to me, +I still felt a great curiosity to know Mrs. Randall's opinion of her; +so, after a time, I ventured to speak of my having seen her, and to +ask when and where she taught school. With a merry laugh, Mrs. +Randall replied, "I wonder, now, if she's made your acquaintance so +soon! She told you, I suppose, to come to her with all your +troubles, for she knew just how to pity you, as she'd been a +schoolma'am herself." + +My flushed cheeks betrayed the fact that Mrs. Randall had guessed +rightly, and after a moment she continued: "Her keeping school +amounts to this. When she was a girl, a friend of hers who was +teaching wanted to go away for two days, and got Miss Ross, then +Nancy Smedly, to take her place, and that's the long and short of her +experience. She's a meddlesome woman, and makes more trouble in the +district than anybody else. She tried to make Miss Brown think she +was misused, because we wouldn't hire her instead of you, who applied +first, and for a spell, I guess Miss Brown was a little sideways, but +she's a sensible woman and has got all over it." + +I was about to tell her of the trouble between George and Ike, when +she anticipated me by saying, "George says he and Ike Ross _fit_ +about a seat, and I've hired him to give it up peaceably, for if Miss +Ross gets miffed in the beginning, there's no knowing what kind of a +row she'll raise, and you are so young I feel kinder tender of you." + +If there were tears in my eyes, they were not tears of grief, and if +I was pleased with Mrs. Randall before, I liked her ten times better +now, for I saw in her a genuine sincerity which convinced me she was +my friend indeed. To be sure, she was rather rough and unrefined, +but her heart was right, and in her treatment of me, she was always +kind and considerate, making ample allowance for my errors and warmly +defending me when she thought I was misused. If in every District +there were more like Mrs. Randall, the teacher's lot would not be +one-half so hard to bear as oftentimes it is. + +When I awoke next morning I heard the large raindrops pattering +against the window, and on pushing aside the curtain, I saw that the +dark heavy clouds betokened a dull, rainy day. Involuntarily, I +thought of the old garret at home, where on such occasions we always +resorted, "raising Cain generally," as Sally said, and when, with +umbrella, blanket-shawl, and overshoes, I started for school, I +looked and felt forlorn indeed. Raining as it was, it did not +prevent Mrs. Ross from coming out with the table-spread over her +head, to tell me that "though she never warn't an atom particular, +and never meant to interfere with teachers, as she knew just what it +was, she _did_ hope I'd give Isick the seat, and not be partial to +George Randall." + +I replied that "I'd see to it," and was hurrying along, when she +again stopped me to know "what I'd got in my dinner basket that was +good." + +Afterwards I found it to be one of her greatest peculiarities, this +desire to know what her neighbors had to eat, and I seldom passed her +door that she did not inquire of me concerning the "kind of fare" I +had at the different places where I boarded. When I reached the +schoolhouse, I found George Randall transferring his books to another +part of the room, at the same time telling Isaac "he could have the +disputed seat if he wanted it." + +With the right kind of training and influence Isaac Ross would have +been a fine boy, for there were in his disposition many noble traits +of character, and when he saw how readily George gave up the seat, he +refused to take it, saying, "he didn't care a _darn_ where he +sat--one place was as good as another." + +That day was long and dreary enough. Not more than half the children +were there, and I found it exceedingly tiresome and monotonous, +sitting in that hard, splint-bottomed chair, and telling Emma Fitch +and Sophia Brown, for the hundredth time, that the round letter was +"O" and the crooked one "S." The scholars, too, began to grow noisy, +and to ask me scores of useless questions. Their lessons were half +learned, and if I made a suggestion, I was quickly informed that +their former teacher, Sally Damm, didn't do so. Even little Emma +Fitch, when I bade her keep her eyes on the book instead of letting +them wander about the room, lisped out that "Thally Damm let her look +off;" a fact I did not dispute when I found that she had been to +school all winter without learning a single letter by sight, though +she could repeat the entire alphabet forward and back and be all the +while watching a squirrel on the branches of the tree which grew near +the window. + +Before night a peculiar kind of sickness, never dangerous, but +decidedly disagreeable, began to creep over me, and had it not been +for the mud, I should probably have footed it to Meadow Brook, where +alone could be found the cure for my disease. Just before school was +out a little boy cried to go home, and this was the one straw too +many. Hastily dismissing the scholars, I turned towards the window +and my tears fell as fast as did the rain in the early morning. + +"The schoolma'am's cryin',--she is. I saw her," circulated rapidly +among the children, who all rushed back to ascertain the truth for +themselves. + +"I should think she would cry," said one of the girls to her brother. +"You've acted ugly enough to make anybody cry, and if you don't +behave better to-morrow, Jim Maxwell, I'll tell mother!" + +After the delivery of this speech, the entire group moved away, +leaving me alone; and sure am I there was never a more homesick child +than was the one, who, with her head lying upon the desk, sat there +weeping in that low, dirty schoolroom, on that dark, rainy afternoon. +Where now was all the happiness I had promised myself in teaching? +Alas! it was rapidly disappearing, and I was just making up my mind +to brave the ridicule of Meadow Brook, and give up my school at once, +when a hand was laid very gently on my shoulder, and a voice +partially familiar said, "What's the matter, _Rose_?" + +So absorbed was I in my grief, that I had not heard the sound of +footsteps, and with a start of surprise I looked up and met the +serene, handsome eyes of _Dr. Clayton_, who stood at my side! He had +been to visit a patient, he said, and was on his way home, when, +seeing the door ajar, he had come in, hoping to find me there, "but I +did not expect this," he continued, pointing to the tears on my +cheeks. "What is the matter? Don't the scholars behave well, or are +you homesick?" + +At this question I began to cry so violently, that the doctor, after +exhausting all his powers of persuasion, finally laid his hand +soothingly on my rough, tangled curls, ere I could be induced to +stop. Then, when I told him how disappointed I was, how I wished I +had never tried to teach, and how I meant to give it up, he talked to +me so kindly, so brotherlike, still keeping his hand on my shoulder, +where it had fallen when I lifted up my head, that I grew very calm, +thinking I could stay in that gloomy room forever, if _he_ were only +there! He was, as I have said before, very handsome, and his manner +was so very fascinating, and his treatment of me so much like what I +fancied Charlie's would be, were he a grownup man and I a little +girl, that I began to like him very, very much, thinking then that my +feeling for him was, such as a child would entertain for a father, +for I had heard that he was twenty-seven, and between that and +thirteen there was, in my estimation, an impassable gulf. + +"I wish I had my buggy here," he said at last, after consulting his +watch, which pointed to half-past five, "I wish I had my buggy here, +for then I could carry you home. You'll wet your feet, and you ought +not to walk. Suppose you ride in my lap; but no," he added, quickly, +"you'd better not, for Mrs. Thompson and Mother Ross would make it a +neighborhood talk." + +There was a wicked look in his eye as he said this, and I secretly +wondered if he entertained the same opinion of _Dell_, that he +evidently did of her sister. At length, shaking my hand, he bade me +good-by, telling me that the Examining Committee had placed _me_ and +my school in his charge, and that he should probably visit me +officially on Thursday of the following week. Like a very foolish +child, I watched him until a turn in the road hid him from view, and +then with a feeling I could not analyze, I started for my +boarding-place, thinking that if I gave up my school I should wait +until after Thursday. + +In the doorway, with her sleeves rolled up above her elbows, and her +hair, as she herself said, "at sixes and sevens," was Mrs. Ross, who, +after informing me that "it had been a desput rainy day," asked, "if +I knew whether Dr. Clayton had been to Captain Thompson's?" + +There was no reason why I should blush at this question, but I did, +though my sunbonnet fortunately concealed the fact from my +interrogator, who, without waiting for an answer, continued, "He +drove past here about fifteen minutes ago, and I guess he's been +sparkin' Dell." + +It must have been an evil spirit surely which prompted my reply that +"he had been at the schoolhouse with me." + +"How you talk! Isick never said a word about it!" was Mrs. Ross's +exclamation, the blank expression of her face growing still more +blank when I told her that he did not come until the scholars were +gone. + +"You two been there all sole alone since four o'clock! I'll give up +now! I hope Dell Thompson won't find it out, for she's awful +slandersome; but," she added, coming to the gate, and speaking in a +whisper, "I'm glad on't, and mebby she'll draw in her horns, if she +finds that some of the _under crust_, as she calls 'em, can be +noticed by Dr. Clayton as well as herself." + +Equivocal as this compliment was, it gratified me, and from that +moment I felt a spirit of rivalry towards Dell Thompson. Still, I +did not wish her to know of Dr. Clayton's call, and so I said to Mrs. +Ross, who replied, "You needn't be an atom afeard of _my_ tattlin'. +I know too well what 'tis to be a schoolmarm, and have the hull +Deestrict peekin' at you. So if you've anything you want kept, I'm +the one; for I can be still as the grave. Did the doctor say +anything about Dell, but he didn't, I know, and 'taint likely he said +anything about anybody." + +I replied, that he talked with me about my school, and then as I +heard the clock strike six I walked along. Looking back, as I +entered Mr. Randall's gate, I saw Mrs. Ross's old plaid shawl and +brown bonnet disappearing over the hill as fast as her feet could +take them, but I had no suspicion that her destination was _Captain +Thompson's_! I did not know the world then as well as I do now, and +when the next morning I met Dell Thompson, who stared at me +insolently, while a haughty sneer curled her lip, I had no idea that +she was jealous of me, little Rosa Lee, whose heart was lighter, and +whose task seemed far easier on account of Dr. Clayton's past and +promised visit. + +Saturday night came at last, and very joyfully I started home on +foot, feeling not at all burdened with the compliments of my patrons +or the esteem of my pupils. Oh, what a shout was raised at the +shortness of my three weeks, as I entered our sitting-room! All +laughed at me, except my mother. She was not disappointed, and when +I drew Carrie's little rocking-chair to her side, and told her how +hard my head was aching, she laid her soft hand caressingly upon my +brow, and gently smoothing my short curls, bathed my forehead in +camphor until the pain was gone. Had there been no one present but +our own family, I should probably have cried; but owing to some +untoward circumstance, Aunt Sally Wright was there visiting that +afternoon, and as a teacher I felt obliged to maintain my dignity +before her prying eyes. Almost her first salutation to me was, +"Wall, Rosa, so you've grown old since you left home?" + +"I do not understand what you mean," I answered. + +"Why, I mean," said she, "that somebody told me that Mrs. Green told +them, that Major Pond's wife told her, that Mary Downes said, that +Nancy Rice heard Miss Cap'n Thompson say that you told Dr. Clayton +you was sixteen!" + +I knew that the subject of my age had not come up between me and the +doctor, but it was useless to deny a story so well authenticated, so +I said nothing, and Aunt Sally continued: "They do say you thrash 'em +round about right," while mother asked "who Dr. Clayton was?" + +"Why, he's a young pill-pedler, who's taken a shine to Rosa, and +stayed with her alone in the schoolhouse until _pitch dark_," said +Aunt Sally, her little green eyes twinkling with the immense +satisfaction she felt. + +Greatly I marveled as to the source whence she obtained the +information, which so greatly exceeded the truth; and considering +that no one knew of the doctor's call but _Mrs. Ross_, it really was +a wonder! She was proceeding with her remarks, when we were summoned +to the supper table, where green tea had so good an effect upon her, +that by the time she was blowing her third cup, she began to unbend, +repeating to me several complimentary remarks which she said came +from Mrs. Ross. By this I knew that she had Pine Hill as well as +Meadow Brook upon her hands, and, indeed, 'twas strange how much Aunt +Sally did manage to attend to at once; for, besides keeping her son's +wife continually fretted, and her daughter constantly quarreling with +her husband, by her foolish interference; there was scarcely a thing +transpired in the neighborhood in which she did not have a part. Not +a marriage was in prospect, but she knew something bad of both +parties; not a family _jar_ occurred in which she did not have a +finger. Not a man owed more than he was worth, but she had foreseen +it from the first in the extravagance of his wife. But everybody in +Meadow Brook knew Aunt Sally, and it was a common saying, that "her +tongue was no slander;" so I did not feel as much annoyed as I +otherwise should at her spiteful remarks, which continued with little +intermission until dark, when, gathering up her snuff-box, knitting, +and work-bag, she started for home. + +The next day was the Sabbath, and if at church, I _did_ now and then +cast a furtive glance at the congregation, to see if they were +looking at me because _I_ was a "school-ma'am," it was a childish +vanity, which _I_ have long since forgiven, as I trust my reader will +do. Among the audience was our minister's young bride, and when, +after church, he introduced her to me, saying to her, "This is Rose, +who, I told you, was only thirteen and teaching school," I felt quite +reconciled to my lot, and thought that after all, it was an honor to +be a teacher. + + + + +CHAPTER VI. + +DR. CLAYTON'S VISIT. + +Very slowly passed the days of my second week, for my mind was +constantly dwelling upon the important _Thursday_, which came at +last, and, with more than usual care, I dressed myself for school, +sporting a pale blue and white muslin, which mother said I must wear +only on great occasions. And this, to me, was a great occasion; and +if, for want of a better mirror, I at noon went down to a clear +spring in the woods, and there gave a few smoothing touches to my +toilet, it was a weakness of which, in a similar way, many an older +female has been guilty. On my return to the schoolhouse, I requested +one of the larger girls to sweep the floor as clean as she possibly +could, while two or three of the boys were sent after some green +boughs to hang over the windows. + +"I'll bet we are going to have company; I thought so this morning +when I see the schoolma'am all dressed up," whispered one to +another--and after a time, Jim Maxwell's sister ventured to ask me, +not who was coming, but "how many." + +With a blush, I replied, "Nobody but Dr. Clayton," wondering why his +name should cleave so to the roof of my mouth! In a few minutes, the +fact that Dr. Clayton was coming was known both indoors and out, and +when I saw how fast John Thompson took himself home, after learning +the news, I involuntarily felt as if some evil were impending--a +presentiment which proved correct, for not long after school +commenced, there came a gentle rap at the outer door, which caused a +great straightening up among the scholars, and brought me instantly +to my feet, for I supposed, of course, he had come. What, then, was +my surprise when, instead of him, I met a haughty, looking young +lady, who, frowning majestically upon me, introduced herself as "Miss +Thompson," saying she had come to visit the school. + +I had never before had so good a view of her, and now, when I saw how +dignified she appeared, and that there really was in her manner +something elegant and refined, I not only felt myself greatly her +inferior, but I fancied that Dr. Clayton would also observe the +difference between us when he saw us together. After offering her +the seat of honor--my splint-bottomed chair--I proceeded with my +duties as composedly as possible, mentally hoping that the doctor +would come soon. She probably divined my thoughts, for once, when I +cast a wistful glance over the long hill, she said, "You seem to be +constantly on the lookout. Are you expecting any one?" + +Involuntarily my eyes sought hers, but I quailed beneath their +quizzical expression, and scarcely knowing what I said, replied, "No, +ma'am," repenting the falsehood the moment it was uttered, and +half-resolving to confess the truth, when she rejoined, "Oh, I +thought you were," while at the same moment a little girl, who had +been asleep, rolled from her seat, bumping her head, and raising such +an outcry that, for a time, I forgot what I had said, and when it +again recurred to me I thought it was too late to rectify it. It was +the second falsehood I remembered telling, and it troubled me +greatly. Turn it which way I would it was a lie still, and it smote +heavily upon my conscience. Slowly the afternoon dragged on, but it +brought no Dr. Clayton; and when, at a quarter of four, I called up +my class of Abecedarians to read, what with the lie and the +disappointment, my heart was so full that I could not force back all +the tears which struggled so fiercely for egress; and when it came +Willie Randall's turn to read, two or three large drops fell upon his +chubby hand, and, looking in my face, he called out in a loud, +distinct voice--"You're cryin', you be!" + +This, of course, brought a laugh from all the scholars, in which I +was fain to join, although I felt greatly chagrined that I should +have betrayed so much weakness before Dell Thompson, who, in +referring to it when school was out, said, "she supposed I wanted to +see my mother, or somebody!" + +The sarcastic smile which dimpled the corners of her mouth angered +me, and when, at last, I was alone, my long pent-up tears fell in +copious showers. It is my misfortune never to be able to cry without +disfiguring my face, so that it is sometimes almost hideous to look +upon; and now, as I slowly walked home, I carefully kept my parasol +lowered, so that no one should see me. But I could not elude the +vigilance of Mrs. Ross, who, as usual, was at her post in the +doorway. Although I knew she was a dangerous woman, I rather liked +her, for there was, to me, something winning in her apparent +friendliness, and we had come to be quite intimate, so much so that I +usually called there on my way to or from school; but now, when she +bade me come in, I declined, which act brought her at once to the +gate, where she obtained a full view of my swollen features. + +"Laws a mercy!" she exclaimed, "what's up now? Why, you look like a +toad. What's the matter?" + +"Nothing much," I said, and this was all she could solicit from me. + +That night she called at Mr. Randall's, and after sitting awhile, +asked me "to walk a little piece with her." I saw there was +something on her mind, and conjecturing that it might have some +connection with me, I obeyed willingly, notwithstanding Mrs. +Randall's silent attempts to keep me back. Twitching my sleeve when +we were outside the gate, Mrs. Ross asked if "it were true that I +cried because Dr. Clayton didn't come as he promised?" + +"Why, what do you mean?" I said. To which she replied, by telling me +that after I left her, she just ran in to Cap'n Thompson's a minute +or two, when, who should she find there but Dr. Clayton, and when +Dell told him she'd been to visit the school, he said, "Ah, indeed, I +was intending to do so myself this afternoon, but I was necessarily +detained by a very sick patient." + +"'That explains why she cried so,' said Dell, and then," continued +Mrs. Ross, "she went on to tell him how you looked out of the winder, +and when she asked you if you expected anybody, you said 'No,' and +then at last you cried right out in the school." + +"The mean thing!" I exclaimed. "Did she tell Dr. Clayton all that?" + +"Yes, she did," answered Mrs. Ross; "and it made my blood bile to +hear her go on makin' fun of you, that is, kinder makin' fun." + +"And the doctor, what did he say?" I asked. To which she replied, +"Oh, he laughed, and said it was too bad to disappoint you, if it +affected you like that, but he couldn't help it." + +I hardly knew at which I was most indignant, Dr. Clayton or Dell, and +when I laid my aching head on my pillow, my last thoughts were, that +"if Dr. Clayton ever did come to school I'd let him know I didn't +care for him--he might have Dell Thompson and welcome!" + +I changed my mind, however, when early the next afternoon, the +gentleman himself appeared to vindicate his cause, saying he was +sorry that he could not have kept his appointment, adding, as he +finally relinquished my hand, "You had company, though, I believe, +and so, on the whole, I am glad I was detained, for I had rather +visit you alone." + +Much as I now esteem Dr. Clayton, I do not hesitate to say that he +was then a male flirt, a species of mankind which I detest. He was +the handsomest, most agreeable man I had ever seen, and by some +strange fascination, he possessed the power of swaying me at his +will. This he well knew, and hence the wrong he committed by working +upon my feelings. Never passed hours more agreeably to me than did +those of that afternoon. And I even forgot that I was to go home +that night, and that in all probability father would come for me as +soon as school was out, thus preventing the quiet talk alone with Dr. +Clayton, which I so much desired: so when, about four o'clock, I saw +the head of old Sorrel appearing over the hill, my emotions were not +particularly pleasant, and I wished I had not been so foolish as to +insist upon going home every week. The driver, however, proved to be +Charlie, and this in a measure consoled me, for he, I knew, was good +at taking _hints_, and would wait for me as long as I desired; so I +welcomed him with a tolerably good grace, introducing him to Dr. +Clayton, who addressed him as Mr. Lee, thereby winning his friendship +at once and forever! + +When school was out and the scholars gone, I commenced making +preparations for my departure, shutting down the windows and piling +away books, slowly and deliberately, while Charlie, who seemed in no +hurry, amused himself by whipping at the thistle-tops which grew near +the door. At last Dr. Clayton, turning to him, said, "And so you +have come to carry your sister home, when I was promising myself that +pleasure?" + +Charlie glanced at my face, and its expression, doubtless, prompted +his answer, "You can do so now, if you choose, for I like to ride +alone." + +Of course I disclaimed against such an arrangement, but my objections +were overruled, and almost before I knew what I was doing, I found +myself seated in Dr. Clayton's covered buggy, with him at my side. +Telling Charlie "not to be surprised if he did not see us until +sunset," he drove off in a different direction from Meadow Brook, +remarking to me that "it was a fine afternoon for riding and he meant +to enjoy it." + +I hardly know whether he had any object in passing Captain +Thompson's, but he certainly did so, bowing graciously and showing +his white teeth to Dell, who, from a chamber window, looked haughtily +down upon me, and as I afterwards learned, made fun of my pink +sunbonnet and little yellow dotted shawl. The sight of her naturally +led him to speak of her, and much to my surprise, he asked me how I +liked her! I could not answer truthfully and say, "very well;" so I +replied that "I hardly knew her. She was very fine-looking, and I +presumed she was very intelligent and accomplished." + +"You are a good-hearted little girl, Rose," said he, "to speak thus +of her. Do you suppose she would do the same by you if asked a +similar question?" + +"Oh, no," I answered eagerly, "she couldn't say I was fine looking. +Nobody ever said that." + +"If I should tell you that _I_ think you better looking than Dell +Thompson, what would you say?" he asked, looking under my bonnet, +while, with glowing cheeks, I turned my head away, and replied, "I am +sure you would not mean it. I know I am ugly, but I do not care so +much about it now as I used to." + +There was a silence for some minutes, and when he spoke again, it was +of faces, which, without regularity of features or brilliancy of +complexion, still had an expression exceedingly pleasing and +attractive. "I do not say yours is such a face," said he, "for I +never flatter; but I do say, and I mean it, too, that I like your +looks far better than I do Miss Thompson's." + +If I had cried then, as I wished to, I should have done a most +foolish thing; but by a strong effort of the will, I forced down my +tears, and changing the conversation, commenced talking on subjects +quite foreign to Dell Thompson, or good looks. I found Dr. Clayton a +most agreeable companion, and ere the close of that ride, he was "all +the world" to me. In short, I suppose I was as much in love as a +child of thirteen can well be, and when we at last reached home and I +introduced him to my mother and sisters, I blushed like a guilty +thing, stealing out of the room as soon as possible, and staying out +for a long time, although I wanted so much to be back there with him. + +"Catched a beau, hain't you? and a handsome one too!" said Sally, +applying her eye to the keyhole and thus obtaining a view of his face. + +Tommy Trimmer, a little boy, five years of age, who lived near by, +and who chanced to be there, overheard her, and when Dr. Clayton, who +was very fond of children, coaxed him into his lap, he asked, +pointing to me, "Be you Rosa's beau? Sally said you was!" + +The doctor laughed aloud, referring Tommy to me for an answer, and +telling him "it was just as I said." + +"Rose is altogether too young to be riding round with beaux. It will +give her a bad name," said grandma, when at last the doctor was gone. + +No one made any answer until Lizzie, who was more of my way of +thinking, said, "You must have had beaux early, grandma, for you +wasn't quite fifteen when you were married; I saw it so in the Bible!" + +Of course, grandma had nothing to offer in her own defense, save the +very correct remark, that "girls nowadays were not what they were +when she was young;"--and here the conversation ceased. + + + + +CHAPTER VII. + +DELL THOMPSON'S PARTY. + +One day, about three weeks after the commencement of my school, I was +surprised by a call from Dell Thompson, who, after conversing awhile, +very familiarly, astonished me with an invitation to visit her the +next afternoon. "She was going to have a few of her friends from the +village," she said, "Dr. Clayton with the rest." + +Here she looked at me and I looked out of the window, while she +continued, "You'll come, I suppose." + +I replied that I would, after which she departed, leaving me in a +perfect state of bewilderment. _I_ invited to Captain Thompson's, +with Dell's fashionable friends! What could it mean, and what should +I wear? This last was by far the more important question; for I knew +that the people of the village were noted for their fine dress, and +I, of course, could not compete with them in point of elegance. Dr. +Clayton, too, I had heard, was rather fastidious in his ideas of a +lady's dress, and my heart sank within me as I mentally enumerated +the articles of my scanty wardrobe, finding therein nothing which I +deemed fit for the occasion, save a white dotted muslin, which was +now lying soiled and wrinkled at the bottom of my trunk. It is true, +I had a blue and white lawn, neatly made and quite becoming, but my +heart was set upon the muslin, and so when Mrs. Ross, with whom I was +that week boarding, offered to wash and iron it, I accepted the +proffered kindness. + +The next morning when I passed Captain Thompson's, I observed a great +commotion in and around the house. The blinds were thrown back, and +through the parlor windows I caught sight of brooms and dusters, +while at intervals during the day, the scholars brought me tidings of +cake, jellies, and ice-cream, said to be in progress. At precisely +four o'clock I dismissed school, and taking a short cut across the +fields, soon reached my boarding-place, where I found Mrs. Ross +bending over the ironing-table with a face flushed, and indicative of +some anxiety. + +"I never see nothin' beat it," she began, holding down her hot iron +and thereby making a slightly yellow spot on the dress. "I never see +nothin' beat it, how this gown pesters me. It must be poor stuff, or +something--but mebby it'll look better on you," she continued, as she +gave it a finishing touch, and then held it up to view. + +And, indeed, it was sorry-looking enough; some places being wholly +destitute of starch, while others were rough and stiff as a piece of +buckram. Common sense told me to wear the blue, but I had heard Dr. +Clayton say that nothing became a young girl so well as white, and so +I determined to wear it. It would look better on me, I thought, and +with all the eagerness of a child I commenced my toilet, discovering +to my great dismay that I had neither shoes nor stockings fit to wear +with a muslin dress. The week previous I had taken my best ones +home, where I had purposely left them, not thinking it possible for +me to need them. Here then was a dilemma, out of which Mrs. Ross at +last helped me, by offering to lend the articles which I lacked; an +offer which I gladly accepted. Her stockings were rather coarse, +having been knit by herself, but they possessed the virtue of being +white, and clean, and would have answered my purpose very well, had +it not been for the slippers which were far too long for me, and +showed almost the whole of my foot. Besides that, I found it rather +difficult keeping them on, until Mrs. Ross suggested the propriety of +stuffing the toes with cotton! This done, I donned the muslin dress, +which seemed to me much shorter than when I had last worn it, +inasmuch as I had the painful consciousness of being all feet, +whenever I glanced in that direction. + +But Mrs. Ross said "I looked mighty crank," at the same time +fastening on my low-necked waist her glass breast-pin, which she +pronounced, "just the checker." + +"You orto have some gloves to wear when you get there," said she, as +she saw me drawing on my brown ones, "and I b'lieve I've got the very +thing," she continued, bringing from the depths of the bureau-drawer +a pair of white cotton mitts, fancifully embroidered on the back with +yellow and blue. These she bade me "tuck in my bosom until I got +there, and on no account to lose 'em, as she had 'em before she was +married!" + +Thus equipped, I started for Captain Thompson's, reaching there just +as the clock was striking five, and finding, to my surprise, that I +was not only the first arrival, but that neither Mrs. Thompson nor +Dell had yet commenced dressing! Fearing I had mistaken the day, I +questioned the servant-girl who answered my ring, and who assured me +that I was right, while at the same time she conducted me to the +chamber above, where, in the long mirror, I obtained a full-length +view of myself, feet and all! My first impulse was to laugh, my +second to cry, and to the latter I finally yielded. No one came near +me--I heard no one--saw no one, until in light flowing muslin, white +silk hose, and the tiniest of all tiny French slippers, Dell Thompson +sailed into the room, starting with well-feigned surprise when she +saw me, asking how long I had been there and what was the matter. + +Without considering what I was doing, I told her unreservedly about +the shoes and stockings, pointing to my peacock feet as proof of what +I said. With all her faults, there was enough of the woman about +Dell to inspire her with a feeling of pity for me, and after forcing +back the laugh she could not well help, she said kindly, "Your shoes +are rather large, but I think, perhaps, I can remedy the difficulty." + +At the same time she started to leave the room. What new impulse +came over her, I never knew; but sure am I that something changed her +mind, for, when nearly at the door, she suddenly paused, saying: "I +know, though, you can't wear my slippers, so it's of no use trying +the experiment:" adding, as she saw how my countenance fell, "I +wouldn't mind it if I were you. Nobody'll notice it, unless it is +Dr. Clayton, who, I believe, admires small ankles and little feet; +but you don't care for him, he's old enough to be your father, and, +besides that, he thinks you perfect, any way." + +Her words and manner annoyed me, and for a moment I debated in my own +mind the propriety of leaving at once, but I had not seen Dr. Clayton +since he carried me home, and so I finally concluded to remain, +thinking that I would keep my seat, and on no account stir when he +was looking at me. After coming to this conclusion, I ventured to +ask Dell where the rest of the company were, and was told that they +were not invited until evening. + +"Until evening," I repeated; "then I guess I'll go before they come, +for I shall be afraid to walk home alone." + +"There's a good moon," said she; adding, "You must not leave, on any +account, for that will spoil all the--pleasure," she said--_fun_ I +now think she meant; but I could not fathom her then, and I never +dreamed that she had invited me there merely to show me up before her +fashionable friends, and make light of me in the estimation of Dr. +Clayton. + +"Come down to the parlor," she said at last, after arranging for the +third time the heavy braids of her black, beautiful hair; and +following her, I soon stood in the presence of Mrs. Thompson, a tall, +dark, haughty looking woman, who, half arising from the sofa, bowed +stiffly, muttering a few words of welcome as Dell introduced me. + +Dropping into the first seat, a large willow chair near the door, I +tried to act natural, but I could not; for turn which way I would, I +felt that a pair of large black eyes were upon me, scanning me from +my head to my _feet_; and when her linen cambric handkerchief went up +to her mouth, apparently to stifle a cough, I was certain that it +also smothered a laugh, which I suppose my rather singular appearance +called forth. Right glad was I when both the ladies found an excuse +for leaving the parlor, though I did find it rather tiresome sitting +there alone until the shades of evening began to fall. + +At last, when it was nearly dark, I ventured out upon the long +piazza, where I had not been long, when a gentleman on horseback +galloped into the yard, and in a moment I recognized Dr. Clayton's +voice, as he gave his horse to the keeping of Captain Thompson's +hired man. Hastily retreating to the parlor, I had just time to seat +myself in a corner where I thought I should attract the least +attention, when he entered the room with Dell, whose hand I am sure +he held until he saw me; then quickly dropping it, he advanced to my +side, greeting me kindly, and once, when Dell's back was towards us, +whispering softly: "I am so glad to find you here. I was afraid the +party would prove a bore." + +Just then we heard the sound of fast coming wheels, and in a moment +there came round the corner a long open omnibus, drawn by four +horses, and densely crowded with young people of both sexes, all +seemingly shouting and laughing with all their might. I was not much +used to the ways of the world then, and having been taught that it +was not ladylike to be either rude or boisterous, I wondered greatly +that well-bred people should conduct themselves so badly: a species +of wonder, by the way, in which I now occasionally indulge. Bounding +out, and adjusting their light, flowing robes, the young ladies went +tripping up the stairs, still talking, laughing, and screaming so +loudly, that once I started up, exclaiming, "Why, what is the matter!" + +With a peculiar smile, Dr. Clayton laid his hand on my head in a very +_fatherly_ way, saying: "My little girl hasn't yet learned that in +order to be _refined_, she must be rough and boisterous, and I hope +she never will, for it is refreshing to find occasionally something +feminine and natural." + +By this time the guests were assembled in the parlor, and when I saw +how tastefully they were dressed, and how much at ease they appeared, +I began to wish myself anywhere but there. One by one they were +presented to me, I at first keeping my seat; but when Dr. Clayton +whispered to me to stand up, I did so, bending my knees a little, so +as to make my dress longer, and thus partially hide my feet! But +this could not be done, and like two backgammon boards they set out +at right angles, with the wads of cotton lying up, round and hard. +The young ladies had undoubtedly received a description of me, for +they inspected me closely, glancing the while mischievously at Dell, +who seemed to be in her element; asking me if I were not tired; +telling me I looked so, and adding, aside, but loud enough for Dr. +Clayton and myself to hear--"I should think she would be, for she's +been here ever since five o'clock. I hadn't even commenced dressing!" + +"Is it possible?" said one; while another exclaimed, "How _green_! +but I suppose it's her first introduction into society, and she knows +no better." + +This conversation was probably not intended for me, but I heard it +all, and with much bitterness at my heart I turned away to hide my +tears, involuntarily drawing nearer to Dr. Clayton, as if for +protection. But, for some reason or other, he did not appear now as +he did when we were alone; then he was all kindness and attention, +while he now evidently avoided me; seeming slightly annoyed when any +of his acquaintance teased him about me, as I more than once heard +them doing. In his nature, as in every other man's, there were both +good and bad qualities, and they now seemed warring with each other; +the former chiding him for deserting me when I stood so much in need +of his attention, and the latter shrinking from anything which would +incur the ridicule of his companions. + +At last, as if his good genius had conquered, he suddenly broke away +from a group of girls, and crossing over to where I was standing, +offered me his arm, telling me "I must stir round and be more +sociable." + +I looked down at my feet, so did he, and for an instant there was a +flush on his face; but it passed off, and with a word of +encouragement, he led me towards the music-room, where Dell Thompson +was unmercifully pounding a five hundred dollar piano, which groaned +and shrieked under the infliction, while the bystanders, who had +insisted upon her playing, were all talking together, seemingly +intent upon seeing which could make the most noise, they or the +instrument. + +"Do you play, Miss Lee?" was asked me by half a dozen or more. + +I had taken lessons two quarters, and I could play a few dancing +tunes, marches, etc., and so I said, whereupon they insisted upon my +favoring them with Mony Musk, as they wanted to dance, and none of +them could perform anything as _old-fashioned_ as that. I looked at +Dr. Clayton, who, in a low tone, asked, "Are you sure you can get +through with it?" + +There was _doubt_ in the tones of his voice which touched my pride, +and without deigning him an answer I took my seat, resolving to do my +best. The set was soon formed, Dr. Clayton dancing with Dell +Thompson, who remarked as he led her away--"I suppose we shall have a +rare performance." + +Something, I am sure, must have inspired me, for never before did I +play so well; keeping perfect time, and striking every note +distinctly. My audience were evidently both surprised and pleased, +for they called for piece after piece, until my list was exhausted, +when one of the gentlemen, more thoughtful than the ladies, suggested +the possibility of my being tired. + +"Perhaps she dances, too. Ask her, Bob," said a young lady, while +Dell eagerly rejoined, "Oh, yes, do;" but Bob was forestalled by Dr. +Clayton, who, for several minutes, had stood by my side, +complimenting my playing, and who now asked me to be his partner in +the next cotillon, his cousin having volunteered to take my place at +the piano. + +In my excitement I forgot my _shoes_, forgot everything, save that +Dr. Clayton's eye was looking down upon me, that my hand was resting +in his, and ere I was aware of it, I found myself upon the floor. I +was perfectly familiar with the changes of the cotillon, but at my +right was John Thompson; who, when it came his turn to swing with me, +refused to take my hand, treating me with such marked insolence that +I became confused, and made several mistakes, at which he laughed +contemptuously. Besides this, my big shoes incommoded me; and at +last, in the midst of the promenade, one of them dropped off, the +_cotton-ball_ rolled out, I tripped, lost my balance, and after one +or two headlong plunges, fell flat at the feet of Dr. Clayton, who +stood aghast with surprise and mortification. It was ludicrous +enough, I know; but I do not think there was any necessity for the +loud roar which was raised over my mishap; and, burning with shame +and vexation, I gathered myself up, and fled from the room; but not +until I heard Dell Thompson say, as she picked up the shoe and passed +it to Dr. Clayton, "It is Mrs. Ross's; she hadn't any of her own +which she thought suitable, and so she borrowed." + +"That accounts for the _cotton-wad_," said John, dealing said wad a +kick that sent it bounding past me. + +Rushing up the stairs, I found my shawl and bonnet; and then, without +a word to any one, started for home, minus my shoe, which I entirely +forgot in my excitement. I had scarcely got outside the gate when +the sound of a footstep caused me to look round, and I saw Dr. +Clayton, his hat in one hand and Mrs. Ross's slipper in the other. +This last he passed to me, and then without a word drew my arm within +his, and for a time we walked on in silence, while I cried as if my +heart would break. Coming at last to an old oak tree, under which a +rude bench had been constructed, he bade me sit down; and placing +himself by my side, asked me, "What was the matter?" + +"You know well enough what's the matter," I said angrily, struggling +to rise; but his arm was strong, and he held me fast, while he tried +to quiet me, and in this he soon succeeded, for he possessed over me +a power which I could not resist. + +Gradually, as I grew calm, I told him all; how I believed that Dell +Thompson had invited me only to ridicule me, how she had asked me to +come in the afternoon, and then made fun of me for doing so; while +her companions called me _green_; and that in the absence of my own +slippers I had worn those of Mrs. Ross; thereby meeting with the +worst catastrophe of all; to wit, the falling flat in the dance! + +Here I broke down entirely, and cried out aloud; while the doctor, +after one or two hearty laughs at my distress, tried again to comfort +me, asking me what I cared for Dell Thompson's ridicule. "She wasn't +worth minding," he said, "and no one who knows her would attach any +importance to her remarks." + +"But what makes her treat me so?" I asked; "I never harmed her." + +For a time the doctor said nothing; but the arm, which all the time +had encircled my waist, drew me still closer to his side, while he at +last replied, "She is _jealous of you_--jealous because she thinks I +like _the little Rose_ better than I do her." + +"And it's very foolish in her to think so," I exclaimed. + +Again the doctor was silent, but by the light of the full moon I saw +that there was a curious train of thought passing through his mind, +but it did not manifest itself in words; for when he again spoke, it +was merely to reply, "Yes, very foolish;" then, after another pause, +he added, "and still I know of no reason why I should like her +best--do you?" + +"Yes," I answered quickly, "there are many reasons. She is handsome; +I am homely. She is graceful; I am awkward. She is rich; I am +poor----" + +"She is artificial; you are truthful;" said he, interrupting me, +while, without paying any heed to this remark, I continued, "she is a +young lady, and I am a little girl--only thirteen." + +"I wish you were older, Rose," said he, "and had seen a little more +of the world." + +Then followed a long conversation in which much was said, which had +far better been left unsaid; for I was a warm-hearted, impulsive +child, believing that I to him was what he was to me. And still he +did not once commit himself, nor in what he said was there aught +which could possibly have been construed into an avowal of anything +save _friendship_, which was the theme upon which he rang many a +change. Alas, for such friendships! They are dangerous to one's +peace of mind, particularly if told beneath an old oak tree, with the +silvery moonlight shining down upon you, and the soft summer air +gently moving the green leaves above your head. How long we sat +there I do not know; but I was the first to propose going, telling +him they would miss him at the party, and wonder at his absence. + +"Let them wonder then," said he; "I have no intention of returning to +the house. It would be intolerable after this pleasant chat with +you, so I shall just get my horse and go quietly home." + +I did not then know that he had not sufficient courage to brave the +jokes and jeers which he knew were sure to greet him, should he +return to Captain Thompson's. Neither did I know that with his +fashionable friends he would scarcely dare defend me; nor that when +John Thompson, once in his presence, imitated the way in which I +stumbled and fell, _he_ joined in the laugh which followed; saying, +though as if in apology, "that it was too bad to make fun of me, for +I was quite a nice little girl." + +We found Mrs. Ross sitting up for me, sleeping in her chair, while +the tallow candle at her side had burned and spluttered away, until +the black, crisped wick was longer than the candle itself. + +"Lordy massy! doctor, is that you?" she exclaimed, rubbing open her +eyes and hooking up her dress, which, for comfort, she had loosened. +"I thought, mebby, you'd beau Rosa home. Come in and stay a spell. +I'd as lief you'd spark it awhile in t'other room as not!" + +But the doctor had no idea of doing anything so marked as that; and +with a whispered good night to me, and an audible one to Mrs Ross, he +departed; just as the good lady asked me, loud enough for him to +hear, "if I'd dirtied her _stockings_, lost her _mitts_, or broken +her breast-pin?" + + + + +CHAPTER VIII. + +CLOSE OF SCHOOL IN PINE DISTRICT. + +Whether Dr. Clayton cared for me or not, he exerted his influence in +my behalf, plainly telling John Thompson that he ought to be ashamed +to annoy me as he did; and dropping a few hints to Mrs. Thompson, who +now tried to restrain her son; so that after the party hostilities in +that quarter nearly ceased. But the ball was in motion, and could +not well be stopped; for what the Thompsons now lacked, the rest of +the District made up. It was the general impression, I believe, that +the scholars had learned nothing save a few pieces of poetry; and +that I had done nothing but whip, scold, and cry. To all these +accusations I plead guilty, and when Mr. Randall, one day, proposed +to me to bring my labors to a close, I replied that "nothing could +please me better," though there was a tremor in my voice as I thought +how the people of Meadow Brook would laugh. Mr. Randall, probably, +divined my thoughts, for he quickly rejoined, "The weather is gettin' +so hot that the youngsters need a vacation. Mebby, in the fall, when +it is cooler, we shall have you back." + +And so it was settled that school should close the next week on +Saturday, and that on Friday I should have an _examination_! This, +to a teacher in Western New York, may seem strange; but those who +have taught in that part of New England where I did, know that such a +thing cannot well be avoided. No matter how small the school, or hew +inefficient the teacher may be, an examination must be held, or you +at once lose _caste_; the people unanimously declaring you to be +ashamed of showing how little your pupils have learned. In my case, +I was rather anxious than otherwise for an opportunity to show off; +for I was sure my scholars would acquit themselves creditably. I +well knew they could stand up and repeat "verses," the multiplication +table, the names of the fourteen counties of Massachusetts, and tell +who made them, and where the sun rose, louder and faster than any +other seventeen children in town! I confidently expected all the +parents and friends to be there, and as my own wardrobe was rather +scanty, I coaxed my sister Anna, who, though several years my senior, +was still not much taller than myself, to let me wear her new black +silk! + +It was my first appearance in a long dress, and it troubled me +greatly; but by dint of holding it up, as ladies do nowadays, I +succeeded in getting to the schoolhouse, where I found my pupils +arrayed in their best; Ike Ross having in his shirt bosom the +selfsame glass breastpin which I had sported at Dell Thompson's +party. Not wishing the spectators to lose any of the exercises, I +sat in grim silence, awaiting their arrival: but my waiting was all +in vain; for, with the exception of Mrs. Randall and Dr. Clayton, the +latter of whom came in the capacity of Inspector, not a single +individual was present! Not a parent--not a friend, nor a foe--and +still, if the examination had not been held, those who stayed away +would have ridiculed me, and voted my school even a worse failure +than they did. So much for consistency. Parents, I think, are not +sufficiently aware of the great good their occasional presence in the +schoolroom will do, both to teacher and scholar; the latter of whom +will almost invariably study harder and strive to have better +lessons, if there is a prospect of their father or mother's hearing +them recite; while the former, feeling that an interest is taken in +them, will also be incited to fresh efforts for the improvement of +those committed to their charge. + +But not thus thought the people of Pine Hill. Satisfied that an +examination was going on, they stayed at home, expressing their +surprise when they heard that nobody was there, wondering what it +meant, and saying "folks ought to be ashamed for not going!" As if +to make amends for their neglect, Dr. Clayton, in his closing +remarks, said some very complimentary things concerning my school, +which he bade the children repeat to their parents; and such is human +nature, that, when I had received my _Eight Dollars_, and was gone, +the District, in speaking of me, said, "I wasn't the _worst_ teacher, +after all." + +About four o'clock, there came up a thunder shower, which caused both +Mrs. Randall and the scholars to hasten home. Dr. Clayton, on the +contrary, was in no hurry. "It was, perhaps, the last opportunity he +would have of seeing me," he said, "and he meant to improve it." + +It was not very far to Meadow Brook I thought, and so I at last +ventured to say. + +"I know that," he replied; "but people might talk were I to call on +you, and I do not wish to do anything which will affect you +unpleasantly." + +"I don't care what folks say," arose to my lips, but its utterance +was prevented by a flash of lightning and a thunder crash, which made +me shriek aloud, while I covered my face with my hands. + +I shall not describe the way which Dr. Clayton took to calm my +fright, for all who have passed through a similar experience can +imagine it; but the remembrance of that thunder-storm lingered in my +memory long after I had forgotten the night when I sat with him in +the soft light beneath the old oak tree. When the storm had ceased +and the sun was again shining on the tree-tops at the west, he left +me, placing on my hand at parting a little gold ring, on which was +inscribed, simply "Rose." + +"It was the gift of friendship," he said--"nothing more;" and he +wished me to wear it "for the sake of the few pleasant hours we had +spent together." + +I suppose it was wrong in me to accept it. I thought so then, but I +could not refuse it; and remembering the fate of the one sent by +Herbert Langley to Anna, I resolved upon keeping it a secret, and +only wearing it when I was alone. For a long time I sat in the +deserted schoolroom, while the damp air, which came through the open +window, fell upon my uncovered neck and arms, nor was I reminded of +the lapse of time until it began to grow dark around me; then hastily +throwing on my things, I started for Mr. Randall's, wetting my feet, +for I had no rubbers with me. As the result of this, when I awoke +next morning I was conscious of a pain in my head, a soreness in my +throat, and an aching of my back, quite as unexpected as it was +disagreeable. I had taken a violent cold, and Mrs. Randall, when she +saw how pale I was and how faint I appeared, said I must not go to +school. George, she said, would go and tell the scholars, and I must +stay there until my father came for me at night as had been arranged +the week before. To this plan I finally yielded, and all the day +long I hovered over the fire, which, in the little sitting-room, was +kindled for my comfort. + +At night, when my father came for me, I was almost too weak to stand +alone; but the excitement of riding imparted to me an artificial +strength, which wholly deserted me the moment I reached home, and for +many days I kept my bed, attended by _Dr. Clayton_, who accidentally +heard of my illness, and who came daily to see me. Grandma, who was +something of a nurse, proposed several times that he be dismissed, +saying, he only made me worse, for I was always more feverish and +restless after one of his visits! But the doctor, to whom she one +day made the suggestion, said he should not leave me until I was +well, and when she asked him how he accounted for my rapid pulse and +flushed cheeks, whenever he was present, he very gravely replied, +that "possibly my _heart_ might be _affected_--the symptoms seemed +much like it," adding, as he saw the look of concern on grandma's +face, "but I think I can cure that, don't you, Rose?" turning to me, +and taking my hand to see _how fast my pulse did beat_! + +After this, grandma made no further objections to his visits. "If +Rose had the heart disease, and he could cure it, he ought to do so!" + +But, alas! for the heart disease, which feeds upon the smile of one +who, when sure that he holds it in his grasp, casts it from him, as +children do a long coveted toy, of which they have grown weary. + + + + +CHAPTER IX. + +PRO AND CON. + +On a pleasant May morning, in the spring succeeding the events +narrated in the last chapter, the door of Dr. Clayton's office was +locked against all intruders. The shutters were closed; while +within, with his feet upon a table and his hands clasped over his +head, the doctor himself was revolving the all-important +question--whether it were better to offer himself at once to Dell +Thompson "and have it done with," or to wait a few years for a +_little girl_, who had recently crossed his pathway, leaving on his +memory footprints he could not easily efface. For the benefit of any +young man who may be similarly situated, we give a portion of his +reasoning, as follows: + +"Now, I am as positive as a man need be that I can have either of +them for the asking; therefore, in a case which involves the +happiness of one's whole life, it behooves me to consider the matter +well. To be sure, if I follow the bent of my inclination, I am +decided at once; but then, marriages of convenience sometimes prove +just as pleasant as those of pure love; and so I'll go over with the +pros and cons of both, deciding upon the one which has the most of +the former! + +"First, then, there's _Rose_, a most beautiful name. Only think how +refreshing it would be after riding ten or twelve miles, visiting +farmer Stubbs or widow Grubbs, to know there was a _Rose_ watching +for your return. Yes, her name is in her favor." + +Here the hands came down from the head, and wrote One _pro_ against +the name of Rose, after which they resume their former position, and +the doctor goes on with his soliloquy: + +"She is frank, artless, unassuming, means what she says--in short, +she is perfectly natural, and I always feel refreshed after a talk +with her." (Makes _pro_ No. 2.) "Then she is so wholly unselfish in +her affection for me--loves me so devotedly--sees no fault in me +whatever--thinks me handsome, I dare say, and all that." + +Here glancing at himself in a little mirror opposite, and smoothing +his shining mustache, the doctor waxes eloquent on said Rose's +supposed admiration for him, writing down, in the heat of his +excitement two _pros_, making in all _four_! Verily, Rosa Lee, your +prospect of becoming Mrs. Dr. Clayton is brightening fast. But to +proceed: + +"She is smart, intelligent, talented, writes poetry--and, with proper +training, would perhaps make a distinguished writer. Were I sure on +this point, I should not hesitate; but you can't tell what these +precocious children will make; frequently they come to a standstill." + +And here, to make the matter sure, he writes against her name one +_pro_ for what she possibly may be, and one _con_ for what she +probably will not be! + +"Then I love her better than anything else in the known world. I do, +that's a fact; but she's young--only fourteen--and before she's old +enough to marry she may change forty times, and that would kill me +dead." + +Puts down one _pro_ for his own love, and one _con_ for Rose's +possible inconstancy. + +"But she is poor--or, her father, they say, is worth only about +$5,000! He already has nine children, and there's time enough for +three or four more:--_thirteen_ into _five thousand_ makes--_Long +Division_, a rule I never fancied; too poor altogether!" + +And against Rose's name there is _con_ No. 3, _long_ and _black_, +with the shadow of her four unborn brothers, who, by the way, never +came in for a share of the $5,000. + +"Then her family connections, I do not suppose, are such as would add +anything to my influence. Good, respectable people, no doubt, but +not known in the world like the Hungerfords, Dell Thompson's maternal +relatives. To be sure, I once heard Rose speak of an uncle who +resides in Boston, but I dare say he's some grocer or mechanic, +living on a back street; while Dell's uncle, from the same city, must +be a man of wealth and importance, judging by the figure his wife +cuts when she visits the captain." + +Here Dell received a _pro_ for the Hungerford blood flowing in her +veins, while Rose had a _con_ for the want of said Hungerford blood. + +"Dell, too, has $10,000 of her own, or rather will have, when her +grandmother dies; and there are not many young men who can jump into +that fortune every day. Yes, $10,000 is a decided temptation." + +And lest Rose, who already numbered _six_, should come out in the +majority, three long marks were put down against the $10,000 to be +inherited at the death of a grandmother, whose name Dell bore. + +"Then Dell has an _air_, which shows at once what she is, and no man +need be ashamed of her in any place." (Mark No. 5.) "Then, again, +she's handsome--decidedly so--such beautiful eyes! such small feet! +and curls!" + +Here a vague remembrance of certain long shoes, with wads of cotton, +_versus_ French slippers and silken hose, arose before the man of the +world, resulting in a _pro_ for the slippers, and a _con_ for the +cotton! + +"But Dell is deceitful--high-tempered--artificial--selfish, +superficial--and all that! The other picture suits me best, or +would, were it not for the Hungerford blood, and the $10,000. Let me +see how it foots up:--Six _pros_ for Dell, and the same number for +Rose." + +Here was a dilemma; but anon he remembered how awkwardly the last +mentioned young lady looked, when she fell at his feet--and this +decides the matter. He is sensitive to ridicule, very, and he could +not endure the sneering remarks which an avowed attachment to her +might call forth from the world of fashion; so he crosses one of the +_pros_ which he had written against her name, when he thought how +much she admired him--and then it stands, Dell 6; Rose 5! + +Thus was the die cast. Alas! for the young girl, who, that same +spring morning, stole away to her accustomed haunt, the old +grape-vine, whose swelling buds were not an unfit symbol of the +bright hopes now springing in her glad heart. As she sits there +alone, with the running brook at her feet, she thinks of him who has +grown so strongly into her love; and though, in words, he has never +said so, by ten thousand little acts he has told her that her +affection was returned, and for his sake she wishes she was older. +He has wished so too, in her presence, many a time; but as that +cannot be, she resolves to spend the season of her childhood in +making herself what she knows he would wish her to be, were she to +share his lot in life; and then, when the lapse of years shall have, +ripened her into womanhood, she thinks how she can, without shame, +put her hand in his, and go forth into the world satisfied, though it +brought her naught but care, if he were only with her. + +Alas, for thee, Rosa! A few miles to the southward, and the same sun +which now shines softly down on you, looks in through a richly +curtained window, and its golden rays fall on the queenly form of +your rival; who, with a look of exultation on her finely cast +features, listens to the words she has long waited to hear, and which +have now been spoken; while he, of whom you dream, bends gently over +her, _his own--his betrothed_! And still, in the very moment of his +triumph, there comes up before him a pale, childish face, which, with +its dreamy eyes of blue, looks reproachfully upon him. But pride and +ambition weave together a veil which hides the image from his view, +bidding him forget that any other save the peerless Dell, e'er +stirred the fountain of his love. + +* * * * * * + +Would it be well for us always to know what is passing in the minds +of our friends, whether present or absent? I think not; and still, +could Rosa Lee have known what had transpired, methinks she would not +have darted away so quickly as she did, when told that Dr. Clayton +was coming through the gate one afternoon, about six weeks after his +engagement with Dell. _Why_ she ran, she could not tell, except it +were, as her brother Charlie said, that "gals always run off and +_spit on their hair_, when they saw their beaux coming." + +Homely as this expression is, there was in this case some truth in +it; for, though Rose did not _spit_ upon her hair, she went to her +room and brushed it, winding one or two of the rougher curls about +her finger, then taking from its hiding-place the ring, his gift, she +placed it upon her finger, and with heightened color went down to +greet the doctor, who had come to make his farewell visit--for, four +weeks from that night, Dell Thompson would be his wife. Long had he +debated the propriety of seeing Rose again, conscience bidding him +leave her alone, while inclination clamored loudly for one more quiet +talk with her, one more walk by moonlight, one more look into her +childish face, and then he would leave her forever; never again +suffering a thought of her to come between him and the bride of his +choice. + +And for this purpose he had come; but when he saw how joyfully Rose +met him, and how the bloom deepened on her usually pale cheek, his +heart misgave him, and for the first time, he began to realize the +wrong he had done her. But it was now too late to remedy it, he +thought; and as if bent upon making matters still worse, he asked her +to accompany him in a walk down the green lane, to the haunts he knew +she loved the best, and where they had more than once been before. +Oh, that walk!--how long it lingered in the memory of Rose, for never +before had the doctor's manner been so marked, or his words so kind +as when, together they sat upon the moss-grown bank, beneath the +spreading vine, while he talked to her of the past, of the happiness +he had experienced in her society, and which he said would be one of +the few green spots, to which, in the years to come, he should look +back with pleasure. Then drawing her so closely to him that her head +almost rested upon his shoulder, he asked of her the privilege of +"once kissing her before they parted"----he did not say _forever_, +but the rustling leaves and the murmuring brook whispered it in her +ear as she granted his request, shuddering the while, and wondering +at the strangeness of his manner. Possibly he had it in his mind to +tell her, but if so, he found himself unequal to the task, and he +left her without a word of the coming event, of which she had not the +slightest suspicion. + + + + +CHAPTER X. + +MRS. DR. CLAYTON. + +Although Meadow Brook and Pine District were distant from each other +only four or five miles, there was between the two neighborhoods but +little communication; and this, added to the fact that Aunt Sally +Wright was confined to her bed, was undoubtedly the reason why the +news of the approaching nuptials did not reach us until the week +before the time appointed for them to take place. It was a warm +sultry day in July, that Aunt Sally, who was now convalescent, sent +us word that she would visit us that afternoon, if it was perfectly +convenient; the little girl who brought the message, adding that +"Miss Wright said Miss Lee needn't put herself out an atom, as she +wan't a bit particular what she _ett_." + +Of course it was convenient, and about one o'clock she came, +talkative and full of news as ever. I was suffering from a severe +headache, which, during the morning, had kept me confined to the bed; +but knowing how much Aunt Sally would have to tell, and feeling +curious to hear it all, I went down to the sitting-room, where her +first exclamation was, "Now do tell what makes you look so down in +the mouth?" + +I was about to tell her of my headache, when she prevented me by +continuing--"But law! it's no wonder, seein' you've lost the doctor +slick and clean." + +A dim foreshadowing of the truth came over me, but with a strong +effort, I controlled my feelings, and in a very indifferent manner, +asked her what she meant. + +"Now I'll give up," said she, "if you hain't heerd on't. Why, it's +in everybody's mouth. They are to be married next Thursday night, at +nine o'clock; and the dress is white satin, with a veil that comes +most to the floor." + +"Who is to be married?" asked Anna, eagerly, her interest all +awakened by the mention of white satin and lace veils. + +"Why, Dr. Clayton and Dell Thompson;" returned Aunt Sally. "They was +published last Sunday; Andy Slosson see it himself and told me. They +are goin' first out to York State, to see them great Falls, and then +they are goin' to live in Boston, boardin' at some of them big +taverns; and Dell has got six bran new gowns a-purpose to wear to +breakfast." + +Here Aunt Sally paused for breath, while Anna asked who was invited, +and if it was to be a large wedding. + +"I don't know how large," said Aunt Sally, "but it's pretty likely +all the upper crust'll be there. _I_ hain't been invited, 'cause +they think I'm sick, I s'pose,--but goodness alive! look at Rosa!" +she continued, pointing towards me, who, weary and faint, had laid my +head upon the window-stool. + +"She's got the sick headache," said Anna, while Lizzie, with a +delicate tact, for which in my heart I blessed her, came up to me, +saying, "I don't believe you are able to sit up; I'd go to bed." + +Glad of any excuse to be alone, I left the room, going to my chamber, +where I wept myself to sleep. When I awoke the sun had set, but I +heard the voices of the family below, and once when I thought I +caught the sound of Dr. Clayton's name, I involuntarily stopped my +ears to shut out the sound. A moment after, the door of my room was +softly opened, and Carrie came stealing in on tiptoe. Learning that +I was awake, she advanced towards me, holding to view a note, which +she said had been left there for me by Captain Thompson's hired man, +and was an invitation to the wedding! It was still sufficiently +light for me to see, and leaning upon my elbow, I read on a card, +that Mrs. Thompson would be "at home" from eight to eleven on the +evening of the 25th, while in the corner were the names of "Dr. +Clayton and Dell Thompson." + +There was no longer a shadow of hope!--it was all true, and he had +insulted me with an invitation to witness his marriage with another! +I did not know then, as I afterwards did, that the invitation was +purposely sent by Dell to annoy me! For a moment I forgot my +headache in my anger, but ere long it returned in all its force, and +if the next day my headache continued with unabated severity, it was +not without a sufficient cause, for sleepless nights are seldom +conducive to one's health. Of course I did not attend the wedding, +which was said to have been a brilliant affair; the bride and the +table looking beautifully, while the bridegroom, it was rumored, was +pale and nervous, making the responses in a scarcely audible tone of +voice. + +The next morning, between eight and nine o'clock, as I was on my way +to school, I met the traveling carriage of Capt. Thompson, which was +taking the newly married couple to the dépôt. John was driving, +while on the back seat, with his arm partly around his bride, was the +doctor. My first impulse was not to look at them, but this act +_pride_ forbade, and very civilly I returned the nod of Dell, and the +polite bow of the doctor, whose face turned crimson when he saw me. +A moment more, and a turn of the road hid them from my view; then +seating myself upon a large flat stone, beneath a tree, where were +the remains of a _play-house_ built by my own hands only the autumn +before, I cried out loud, thinking myself the most wretched of +beings, and wondering if ever any one before had such trouble as I! +As nearly as I am able to judge, I was taking my first lesson in +_love-sickness_; a kind of disease which is seldom dangerous, but, +like the toothache, very disagreeable while it lasts. At least I +found it so, and for weeks I pined away with a kind of sentimental +melancholy, which now appears to me wholly foolish and ridiculous; +for were I indeed the wife of Dr. Clayton, instead of Rosa Lee, this +book would undoubtedly never have been written; while in place of +bending over the inkstand this stormy morning, as I am doing, I +should probably have been engaged in washing, dressing, scolding, and +cuffing three or four little Claytons, or in the still more laudable +employment of darning the socks and mending the _trousers_ (a thing, +by the way, which I can't do) of said little Claytons' sire; who, by +this time, would, perhaps, have ceased to call me "his Rose," +bestowing upon me the less euphonious title of "she," or "my woman?" + +But not thus did I reason then. I only knew that I had lost him and +was very unhappy. Many a long walk I took alone in the shadowy +woods, singing to myself snatches of love-songs, particularly the one +containing the following: + + "I have not loved lightly-- + I'll think of thee yet, + And I'll pray for thee nightly, + Till life's sun is set." + + +Somehow, too, I got the impression that my heart was all broken to +pieces; and this fact satisfactorily settled, I began to take a +melancholy pleasure in brooding over my _early death_, and thinking +how Dr. Clayton would feel, when he heard the sad news! Almost every +week I was _weighed_, feeling each time a good deal chagrined to find +that I was not losing flesh as fast as a person in a decline would +naturally do. In this state of affairs, I one day came across a +little sketch of Hannah More, in which her early disappointment was +described, and forthwith I likened myself to _her_, and taking +courage from her example, I finally concluded that if I could not +have the doctor I could at least write for the newspapers, and some +day I might perhaps be able to make a _book_. This, I thought, would +amply atone for my loss--an opinion which I hold still, for if ever I +do see myself in a book, and the _reviews_ let me alone, which, in +consideration of all I have suffered, I am sure they will do, I shall +consider it a most fortunate circumstance that Dell's $10,000, in +prospect, proved a stronger temptation than my father's $5,000 +divided by thirteen! + + + + +CHAPTER XI. + +BOSTON. + +The bridal party had returned from the Falls, and after spending a +week or more at Capt. Thompson's the doctor took down his sign, boxed +up his books, pills, powders, and _skeleton_, which some called his +_'natomy_, while Dell packed up her six morning gowns with hosts of +other finery, and then one day in August they started for Boston; +where the doctor hoped for a wider field of labor, fully expecting to +be aided by the powerful influence of Mr. Marshall, his wife's uncle, +whose high station in the city he never once doubted. For this +opinion he had, as the world goes, some well-founded reasons; for not +only did Dell often quote "my Aunt Marshall of Boston," but the lady +herself also managed to impress the people of Pine District with her +superiority over them, and her great importance at home. +Notwithstanding that she frequently spent several weeks at Capt. +Thompson's she still could not endure the country--"the people were +so vulgar--'twas so dull there, and no concerts, no operas, no +theaters, no star actors, no parties, and more than all, no dear, +delightful old Common, with its shaded walks and velvet grass." + +Of course Dr. Clayton, in thinking of her city home, fancied to +himself a princely mansion on Beacon Street, overlooking the "dear, +delightful old Common," and it is scarcely more than natural that his +heart expanded with some little degree of pride, as he saw in +contemplation the dinner parties, evening parties, soirées, etc., +which he confidently expected to attend at said princely mansion. At +first he had entertained a faint hope that he might possibly board +with his new uncle; but this idea was instantly repelled by his wife, +who did not seem so much inclined to talk of her "city Aunt" as +formerly. So it was decided that they should for a time take rooms +at the Tremont. + +It was a dark, rainy night when they arrived, and as it was cold for +the season, their rooms seemed cheerless and dreary, while, to crown +all, the bride of six weeks was undeniably and decidedly out of +temper; finding fault with everything, even to her handsome husband, +who fidgeted and fussed, brought her the bottle of hair oil instead +of cologne, stepped on her linen traveling dress with his muddy boot, +spit in the grate instead of the spit-box, breathed in her face when +he knew how she disliked tobacco, thought of Rosa Lee, and wondered +if she were ever cross ("_nervous_" Dell called it), thought not, and +_almost wished_--no, didn't wish anything, but as an offset thought +of the $10,000, asked Dell how _old_ her grandmother was, received +for an answer, "I don't know, and I don't care;" after which he went +down-stairs and regaled himself with a cigar until informed that +supper was ready. Ate all alone, Dell refusing to go down--found her +in tears on returning to his room, was told that she "was homesick, +and wished she had never come." _He_ began to wish so too, but said +"she'd feel better by and by." Sat for an hour or more cross-legged +listening to the rain, and wondering if there _was_ a cure for +_nervousness_; finally went to bed and dreamed of Rosa Lee and the +moonlight night, when they sat under the old oak tree, and of the +thunderstorm when he gave her the little gold ring. + +The next morning Mrs. Doctor Clayton was all smiles, and when, with +her handsome eyes, shining hair, and tasteful wrapper, she descended +to the breakfast-room, she attracted much attention, and more than +one asked who she was, as they turned for a second glance. Nothing +of this escaped the doctor, and with a glow of pride he forgot the +vexations of the night previous, and gave vent to a mental _pshaw!_ +as he thought of his dream; for well he knew that the little +plain-faced Rosa could not compare with the splendid woman at his +side. Breakfast being over, he ventured to suggest the possibility +of their soon receiving a call from her aunt; but Dell hastily +replied, that such a thing was hardly probable, as her Aunt had her +own affairs to attend to, and would not trouble herself about them. +The doctor's hands went into his pockets, and his eyes went over +inquiringly to his wife, who continued speaking rapidly, as if it +were a painful duty which she felt compelled to perform. + +"I don't know where you got the idea that Uncle Marshall is such a +great man--not from me, certainly. But got it you have, and it's +time you knew the truth. He is a good, honest man, I dare say, and +respectable, too; but he is not one of the _ton_, by any means. Why, +he's nothing more nor less than a _tailor_, and earns his bread from +day to day." + +"But his wife"--interrupted the doctor--"how happens it that she +supports so much style?" + +"Oh, that's easily accounted for," returned Dell. "They have no +children--she is fond of dress, and spends all she can get for that +purpose. She was an apprentice girl and learned her trade in my +uncle's shop, and it is said, sometimes helps him now when he is +pressed hard." + +"Why did you never tell me this before?" asked the doctor, his brow +growing thoughtful. + +"And why should I tell you?" answered Dell. "What did I suppose you +cared whether he were a _prince_ or a _tailor_. You married me, I +hope, for myself, and not for my relations." + +The doctor thought of the ten thousand dollars just in time to force +down the answer which sprang to his lips, and which was far better to +be unuttered; so, in its place, he asked, "Where do they live?" + +"On a back street, some distance from here," said Dell; adding, that +their house, though small, was pleasant and neatly furnished. "It is +well enough in the country to have a _city Aunt_ on which to plume +one's self," she continued, laughingly; "but here, where she is +known, I do not intend having much intercourse with her, for a +_physician_ and _tailor will_, of course, occupy entirely different +positions. However, I must treat her, at first, with a show of +politeness, and if you are so disposed, we'll go round there and call +this morning." + +The doctor made no objections, and ere long they were walking over +the stony pavement towards R---- street, which, as Dell had said, was +rather out of the way. The house, however, at which they stopped, +was a pleasant little cottage, with a nicely-kept yard in front, +while the parlor, into which they were shown, was quite tastefully +furnished. Mrs. Marshall herself answered their ring, appearing +greatly surprised when she saw them, but not more so than Doctor +Clayton, who would never have recognized the dashing lady of Pine +District in the plain-looking woman, who, in a cheap calico wrapper, +unbrushed hair, and checked apron, now sat before him--his Aunt. And +yet he could not help thinking her far more agreeable than he had +ever seen her before. The truth was, that Mrs. Marshall was one of +those weak-minded women who, being nothing at home, strove to make +amends by "making believe" abroad; assuming everything in the latter +and nothing in the former condition. Consequently, she, who in the +country was proud and overbearing, affecting ignorance of the most +trivial matters, was, at home, a comparatively quiet, domestic woman; +doing her own work, and, aside from being a little jealous and +envious of her more fortunate neighbors, generally minding her own +business. + +After the first flutter of meeting the doctor was over, she became +herself again, and set about entertaining them to the best of her +ability, inviting them to stay with her to dinner, and urging as an +inducement, that she was going to have "peaches and cream for +dessert." But Dell rather haughtily declined, whereupon her aunt +asked "when she would come round and spend the day?" saying, "she +must do so before long, or they might not be in that house." + +"Not be in this house! Why not?" asked Dell; and Mrs. Marshall +replied, "Why, you know, we have always rented it of _Mr. Lee_, and +he talks of selling it." + +Instantly the doctor thought of Rosa, and involuntarily repeated the +name--"Lee--Lee"---- + +"Yes," said Mrs. Marshall. "He has a brother in Meadow Brook, whom +you may know.'" + +"Is he wealthy?" asked the doctor. + +"Why, ye-es, I s'pose so," said Mrs. Marshall, hesitatingly, as if +unwilling to admit what she could not deny. "He lives in a big house +on Beacon street--keeps his carriage--and they say the curtains in +the front parlor cost a thousand dollars, and there are only two +windows either." + +Here she cast a deprecating glance towards her own very prettily +embroidered muslin curtains, which probably cost about a hundredth +part of that sum. Soon after, the newly married pair arose to go, +the doctor feeling, in spite of himself, a little uncomfortable, +though at what he hardly knew; for he would not acknowledge to +himself that he was at all disappointed, because Dell's uncle was a +tailor instead of a millionaire, or because Rose's uncle lived on +Beacon street, and sported curtains which cost a thousand dollars. +This did not in the least affect Dell. _She_ was his wife, and as +such he would love and cherish her, ministering as far as possible to +her wants, and overlooking the faults which he knew she possessed. +Thus reasoned his better nature as he rode home, unconscious that the +object of his thoughts was at that very moment misconstruing his +silence into disappointment, and writing against him bitter things in +her heart. + +It was a peculiarity of Dell's to get angry when people least +expected it, and then to _sulk_ until such time as she saw fit to be +gracious; so when they reached the Tremont, the doctor was astonished +to find her _past speaking_; neither could he by any amount of +coaxing elicit a word from her for more than an hour. At the end of +that time, however, her pent-up wrath exploded; and, in angry tones, +she accused him of feeling sorry that he had married her, because her +uncle didn't prove to be a great man as he had supposed. + +"I saw it all in your face when we were in the omnibus," said she; +"it is of no use for you to deny it," adding, as she burst into +tears, "but you cannot regret _your_ marriage more than I do mine, +and you needn't feel so smart either, for your father was a poor +shoemaker in Maine, and when you went to college you rang the bell in +part payment of your tuition." + +This was a phase of married life for which the doctor was wholly +unprepared, and during the first part of his wife's speech he stood +confounded, but by the time sha had finished, his mind was pretty +well made up to _box her ears_! This, however, he did not do, though +he bade her "shut up her head," repenting the harsh words the moment +they were uttered, and having manliness enough to tell her so. +Winding his arm around her, he talked to her calmly and rationally +until she came out of her pet, and agreed "to make up." This process +we leave to the imagination of the reader, only suggesting that no +one who saw the handsome, loving pair, which half an hour after went +down to dinner, would have dreamed of the dark cloud which had so +recently lowered on their matrimonial horizon. + +* * * * * * + +Here, wishing the doctor success in procuring patients, we leave them +for a time, while we go back to Meadow Brook, where our house was one +day thrown into a state of unusual excitement by the arrival of a +letter from Aunt Charlotte, which contained an invitation for Anna +and myself to spend the remainder of the autumn and the whole of the +coming winter with her in the city. "Rosa," she wrote, "could go to +school, while Anna would be introduced into society." + +Of course we were greatly surprised, wondering what had come over our +haughty aunt, who, as the reader will recollect, once spent a +Thanksgiving with us. She must have changed, we thought, or else +there was some mistake about the invitation. But this could not be, +for there it was in black and white, written evidently in all +sincerity, while added to it was a postscript from Uncle Joseph, who +also joined in the request. That, if nothing more, proved that the +invitation was genuine, for there was no mistaking my uncle's +peculiar handwriting, and it only remained for us to decide whether +we would accept or not. Anna and myself said "Yes," at once, and +after a grave deliberation in grandma's room, the same conclusion was +also reached by my parents, who, after giving us abundance of good +advice (not a word of which _I_ heard, as I was wondering if I should +ever meet the doctor and Dell), enjoined it upon Anna, first, never +to dance at the parties which she might sometimes attend; second, +never to wear her dresses indecently low, as some of the city girls +did; and third, not to flirt with Herbert Langley. For this last +injunction they probably fancied there was little need, it being now +five years since she had seen him, and as they knew nothing of the +perfumed, gilt-edged notes which lay hidden in her work-box, they +very naturally supposed she had forgotten him. I thought so, too, +for hers was the last letter, which had been unanswered for many +months, and Anna, I knew, was far too proud to care for one who had +forgotten her. + +Occasionally we had heard of him through others, and it was always +the same story, viz., that he was going down to a drunkard's grave, +as fast as daily drams and weekly sprees could carry him; but if +these reports produced any effect upon Anna, it was imperceptible. +She was now twenty years of age, and was a fair, delicate-looking +girl, whom some called _proud_, others _cold_, and a few _selfish_; +but this last I deny, for though she might appear so to strangers, +there was not in our whole family, if I except brother Charlie, one +who would sacrifice more of their own comfort for that of another +than would my sister Anna; neither was there one whom I loved better, +for though she was six years my senior, she always treated me as one +nearer her own age, while I looked up to her as my oracle, thinking +that whatever she did must necessarily be right. + +When it was decided that we were to go, the next important, and to +me, most delightful task, was the looking over and fixing up of our +wardrobes, which kept us busy for some time. As Anna was to go into +society, she of course had nearly all the new things, and much as I +loved her, I must confess to a feeling of envy when I saw the black +silk, blue merino, crimson and brown delaine, etc., which were +purchased for her, while I was put off with her old dresses, "made +over as good as new," but when I too, was presented with a blue +merino by Charlie, who was now a clerk in one of the Meadow Brook +stores, all my bad feelings left me, and with great alacrity I +assisted in the preparations: + +It was a lovely day late in October, that old Sorrel stood at the +door ready to convey us to the dépôt. This was the first time I had +really left home, and when I saw the tears in my mother's eyes, and +the trembling of grandma's whole body; when Juliet held me so long to +her bosom; when Lizzie and Carrie stole from me a hasty kiss, and +then ran off to hide their grief; when Charlie and John, who were +both clerks, came down to the dépôt to bid us good-by, affecting to +be very manly, notwithstanding that their chins quivered; and when, +last of all, my father's fervent "God bless you, my children," +resounded in my ears, I began to have a faint idea of the bitterness +there is in parting, be it but for a few months. As we expected, we +found our uncle's carriage at the dépôt in Boston, and ere long we +had reached his house in Beacon street. + +I remember the thrill of delight which I experienced, when first I +entered my Aunt Charlotte's stylish house, and felt that it was to be +my home, at least for a time. Everything was in perfect order, and +for an instant I looked around me in silent wonder, almost forgetting +to reply to the greeting of my aunt, who, in heavy brocade and long +blue streamers depending from her head, met us kindly and hoped we +were well. She had changed since last I saw her, but it was more the +work of care than of time. She was much thinner, and the crow-tracks +around her eyes were now decidedly deep-cut wrinkles, while her hair +was here and there streaked with more than one silver thread. + +My uncle was still the same good-humored, pleasant man, a little +afraid of his wife, it may be, but evidently master of his own house. +I glanced around for Herbert, but he was not there, and when, on +Anna's account more than my own, I asked for him, I was told that he +was down street, but would soon be home. Ringing a bell, my aunt +bade the girl who appeared, "show the young ladies to their rooms," +which proved to be a large airy chamber with a bedroom, +dressing-room, and closet adjoining. After a hasty toilet we again +returned to the parlor, where we found a tall, richly dressed young +man, whom I should never have recognized as Herbert Langley. He was +much altered from when I last saw him: there was a deep flush on his +cheeks, which had reached even to his nose; while the eyes I had once +thought so handsome were watery and unsteady in their movement. On +the whole, however, he was still what some would call good-looking. +He was sitting with his back to the door, but at the sound of our +footsteps he turned around, and coming towards us, welcomed us most +cordially to Boston, calling us "cousins," and claiming a cousin's +privilege of kissing us--me _once_, and Anna _three_ times, if not +four. + +She was a little piqued at his neglect in answering her last letter, +and wishing to show proper resentment, she drew back rather +haughtily, as if wondering how he dare "take such liberties." This +he readily perceived, and instantly assuming an air quite as +indifferent as her own, he turned towards me, hardly noticing her +again, though it was easy to see that the reserve of both was merely +affectation. That evening he was gone until nine o'clock, and when +he entered the parlor, I noticed on the face of my aunt the same +anxious expression which I remembered having seen there, when, from +our sitting-room window, she watched his return. But he was +perfectly sober, and with a sigh of relief she resumed her work; +while he, coming round to my side, startled me by saying that "he had +just met with a friend of mine--Dr. Clayton." + +"Where did you see him?" asked Anna, while I bent lower over the book +I was reading; for that name had still a power to move me strongly. + +"Why," answered Herbert, "Tom Wilson, an old schoolmate of mine, +boards at the Tremont, where he is now lying very sick. All the old +physicians have given him up, and so he has employed this Dr. +Clayton, who, it seems, has been at the same hotel for six weeks or +more. I called on Tom this evening, and while I was there Dr. +Clayton came in. In the course of our conversation he spoke of +Meadow Brook, and then, as a matter of course, I said there were now +in our family two young ladies from that place. When I mentioned +Rosa's name, he turned almost as white as Tom himself, and if she +were not so young, I should be inclined to think there was something +between them. What do you say, coz?" + +Here Anna came to my aid, saying, "Why, he's a _married man_, and his +wife is with him at the Tremont." + +"The dickens he is!" said Herbert, looking a little puzzled. Then +turning to his mother, he added, "Mother, you ought to call on this +Mrs. Clayton, for if she is an acquaintance of Anna and Rosa, they +will very naturally wish to see her occasionally." + +"She needn't call for me," said I, quickly. + +"Nor for me, for I don't know her," rejoined Anna, while with a +haughty toss of her head, Aunt Charlotte replied, that "her circle of +acquaintances was quite large enough now, and she'd no idea of +extending it by taking in people about whom she knew nothing." + +I know it was very wrong in me, but I could not help straightening up +a little in my chair as I wondered what the proud Dell Thompson would +say if she knew that the despised Rosa Lee was living as an equal in +a family which looked down upon her and her husband as nobodies. I +was roused from my reverie by my aunt's asking Herbert in a low tone, +"how _Ada_ was to-night," and glancing towards him, I fancied that +said _Ada_, whoever she might be, was to him not a very pleasant +subject just then, for his brow darkened visibly, while he replied, +"I never once thought to inquire, but I dare say she's no worse, or +she would have sent for you post haste." + +There was a moment's silence, and then my aunt again spoke, "Herbert, +I wish you'd do better. You know how lonely she is, and how much she +must necessarily feel your neglect." + +"Fudge!" was his answer, as he folded his hands over his head, and +leaning back in his chair, looked straight into the astral lamp. + +That night, when Anna and I were alone in our room, the former sat +for a time in deep thought, saying, when I at last told her the clock +was striking eleven, "I wonder who _Ada_ is!" + +_I_ wondered so, too, and my interest was not at all diminished when +the next morning, at the breakfast-table, Aunt Charlotte said to her +son, "Herbert, I shall be busy this morning making arrangements about +a school for Rosa, and I wish you'd go in and see Ada, will you?" + +"Yes, yes, I will," said he, rather impatiently, adding, "and if I +don't find her any better, I mean to assume the responsibility of +discharging that old superannuated _greeny_ who attends her, and +install Dr. Clayton in his place. I took quite a fancy to him, and +I'm going to give him my patronage!" + +"Oh, I wish you would!" I exclaimed involuntarily; for in spite of +the wrong he had done me, I cherished no feeling of animosity towards +him. + +Then again, I had heard that it was sometimes very difficult for a +young physician to obtain much practise in a strange place with no +one to help him, and I thought, perhaps, Herbert's "patronage" might +be of some avail. + +"I see," said Herbert laughingly, "there _has_ been something, and +though he is a married man, you still feel an interest in him, and +want him to succeed; all right, and I'll do what I can to help him; +for I verily believe he'll get Tom on his legs again in spite of what +the temperance folks say about his blood's being all turned into +whisky!" + +At these words a shadow passed over Aunt Charlotte's face, but it was +soon chased away by the next remark of Herbert, which was, "Ain't you +glad, mother, I reformed before I got to be as bad as Tom? Why, +girls (addressing Anna and me), I haven't drank a drop +since--since--how long is it mother, since I left off"--_drinking_ he +could not say, so he finally added, "left off imbibing occasionally?" + +There was a look of happiness on that mother's face, as she replied, +"Almost a year." + +Yes 'twas almost a year since her son had tasted ardent spirits, and +had she not good reasons for thinking he would never fall again? +Assured of this fact, how proud she would have been of her only boy; +for, aside from this great error, he possessed many noble, generous +qualities; and during my stay in Boston, I found that, in spite of +his well-known habits, he was a pretty general favorite. Oh, how +lovingly my aunt looked after him when he went out, and how earnestly +she watched him when he came in, and all the while she was tempting +him beyond what most men could bear; for regularly on her +dinner-table appeared either porter, champagne, or madeira, one taste +of which would set him all on fire. But, unfortunately, she belonged +to that class of fashionable people who deem the wine-bottle a +necessary appendage to the dinner table, and if, in the sequel, her +son should fill a drunkard's grave, would there be any just cause +why, in her anguish, she should murmur at Providence for having dealt +with her thus harshly? Ought she not rather to blame herself for +having thus daily tempted him to sin by placing before him what she +well knew was sure to work his ruin? + +But to our story. We were at dinner when Herbert came in from his +morning ramble, and taking his accustomed seat at the table, he said +to his mother, "I called on Ada as you desired, and found her sitting +up in a rose-colored dressing-gown, which she thinks very becoming to +her, I know, for she sat directly opposite the mirror, and I should +not dare tell how many times I caught her casting admiring glances at +herself." + +Aunt Charlotte frowned, while Herbert, turning to me, +continued--"Miss Montrose is so much better that I don't believe I +can patronize your doctor in that quarter, but I'll do something for +him--break my leg, maybe--or have the delirium tremens." + +This species of jesting seemed to be a kind of mania with Herbert, +for almost every day of his life he referred to his former habit of +drinking, greatly to the annoyance of his mother, who, on the +occasion just mentioned, turned slightly pale, while Anna looked down +upon the carpet and sighed. Thinking this as favorable an +opportunity for making inquiries concerning Ada Montrose as I should +have, I asked Herbert who she was. His mother's lips moved as if she +would answer the question, but ere she could speak, Herbert replied, +"She's a Georgia lady, a great coquette, who is spending the winter +here with a fortieth cousin. Some call her handsome, and I believe +mother thinks her beautiful, but if Anna paid as much attention to +her toilet and dressed as elegantly as Ada Montrose, she would, in my +opinion, look far better." + +'Twas the first compliment he had paid Anna since our arrival, and it +brought a bright flush to her usually marble cheek; for Herbert +Langley possessed a strange power over my sister, which she did not +try to resist. I fancied that my aunt was not quite pleased with +Herbert's comparing Miss Montrose to Anna, but ere she could frame +any answer, he asked us if we would like to attend the theater that +evening. Notwithstanding my father's hostility to _circuses_, I did +not remember having heard him say much against _theaters_, and so I +answered quickly, "Oh, yes, Anna, let's go. I want to see what they +do." + +And so, with my aunt's permission, it was settled that we should go, +and at the usual hour I found myself in the National Theater, which +was densely crowded, for a celebrated actress appeared that night for +the last time in Boston. Perfectly bewildered, I followed Herbert +and Anna to my uncle's box, which commanded a fine view of the stage, +and then, when I became a little accustomed to the glare of lights +and the hum of voices, which in some degree reminded me of that +never-to-be-forgotten circus of Cousin Will memory, I ventured to +look over the sea of faces, half starting from my seat as I +recognized among the crowd Dr. Clayton and his wife, the latter +appearing to be looking at us through what I thought resembled the +dice boxes of a backgammon board tied together, but which I soon +learned was an opera-glass. The doctor was paler and thinner than +when I last saw him, and it was with more than one pang that I +watched him as, from time to time, he cast a glance of pride at the +splendid-looking woman at his side, who attracted considerable +attention, and at whom, in the course of the evening, more than one +glass was leveled. + +Ere long my attention was diverted from them to a tall, dark, and +rather peculiar-looking gentleman, who entered the box at our right. +Sinking into a seat, he abandoned himself apparently, to his own +thoughts, which could not have been very pleasant; for his forehead, +which was high and white, seemed at times to be one mass of wrinkles, +while his eyes, large, black, and deepset in his head, alternately +flashed with anger and vexation. I am not much of a physiognomist, +but there was in the face of the stranger something which at once +attracted and riveted my attention. He was not handsome, like Dr. +Clayton--nay, I am not sure but many would call him ugly, but I did +not; and, somehow, I felt certain that no girl of _fourteen_ had ever +wept over his fickleness, for he looked the soul of honor and +integrity. Gradually, too, as the play proceeded, the expression +which I had at first observed passed away; his dark eyes lighted up; +and when, at last, a bright smile broke over his face, I pronounced +him far better looking than the doctor, who was fast losing ground in +my good opinion. + +The play was the "Lady of Lyons," and though I was familiar with the +story, I seemed now to hear it for the first time; so fully did I +enter into the feelings of the heroine, Pauline, whose distress I +could not believe was feigned. All was real to me; and I can now +scarcely repress a smile, as I recall to mind how I must have looked, +standing there with flushed cheeks, clasped hands, staring eyes, and +lips slightly apart, drinking in every word of the actress. Once +Anna pulled my dress, whispering to me, "Do sit down, Rosa; they are +all looking at you, and Mrs. Clayton is laughing and pointing you out +to her husband." + +"I didn't care for Dell Thompson, or the doctor either," and so I +said, while at the same time I glanced towards the stranger, whose +eyes were fixed upon me with an expression I could not fathom. + +He was not making fun of me, I was sure of that; but as if there were +a magnetic influence in his look, which I could not resist, I dropped +into my seat, and remained motionless until the closing scene, where, +with a piercing shriek, Pauline rushed into the arms of her husband. +Then there came over me the same sensation which I had experienced +years before in the old school-house at Meadow Brook. Everything +grew dark around me, and with a faint cry I fell across Anna's lap. +I was not entirely unconscious, for I have a dim remembrance of being +led from the heated room, the close atmosphere of which had probably +helped to bring on my faintness. The cool air outside revived me in +a measure, but it was the mesmeric touch of two large, warm hands +which fully restored to me my faculties, and, looking up, I saw +bending over me the gentleman in whom I had been so much interested. +Dr. Clayton, too, was there, looking worried and anxious, but +instinctively leaving me to the care of the stranger, who seemed to +know exactly what to do. + +"You are better now, I think," said he, gazing down upon me with his +deep black eyes, and adding, with the same peculiar smile I had +before observed, "Miss ----'s acting seldom receives so genuine a +compliment as this. I imagine she ought to feel flattered." + +At this moment a loud stamping and hallooing came to my ear, and, +pulling Anna's shawl, Herbert exclaimed, "Come, let's go in again; +they are calling back the dancing-girl, and I wouldn't miss it for +anything. Come, Rose, you want to see it all, and we'll stand right +by the door." + +I felt perfectly well, and started to follow him, when something in +the stranger's face arrested me, for it seemed to say, "I wouldn't +go." But he did not speak, and bowing to me very politely, he walked +away, while I went after Herbert and Anna, reaching them just in time +to witness a part of Mlle. Lisette's dance, which seemed to me a good +deal like the performance of the _Circus girl_, only "a little more +so;" and I felt certain that Cousin Will, had he been there, would +have pronounced her superior even to the boasted _Albany girl_! + +When at last it was over, and we were again leaving the room, Dr. +Clayton, as if seeing me for the first time, offered me his hand, and +in a low tone expressed to me his pleasure that I was to be in the +city during the winter; adding, as he cast a furtive glance towards +his wife, "You'll come and see me often, won't you; for I am very +lonely?" + +For an instant I felt a thrill of pride, to know that there was yet +aught in me which could interest _him_, but 'twas only for a moment, +and then there came up before me thoughts of the stranger, and owing +to some unknown influence, which I shall not attempt to explain, the +doctor's power over me was from that moment at an end; and though I +still liked him, it was as I would like any friend who evinced a +regard for me. + +Of the stranger I often thought, wondering who he was and whence he +came; but no one knew, and all that I could learn was, that Herbert +saw him the next morning standing on the steps of the Revere House, +and chancing the same afternoon to be at the Worcester dépôt, he saw +him enter the cars bound for Albany, and heard from one of the +bystanders that he was a Georgian, and had probably come to Boston +after "_a runaway nigger!_" Being a true born daughter of +freedom-loving Massachusetts, this intelligence of course had the +effect of cooling my ardor somewhat, and wishing in my heart that +every one of his negroes would run away, I banished him for a time +from my mind. + +After many inquiries, and much consultation with her particular +friend Mrs. Ashley, my aunt at last decided to send me to Madam +----'s school; while Anna, after a two weeks' siege with dressmakers, +was introduced into society, where, if she was not a reigning belle, +she was at least a favorite; and more than once I heard the most +flattering compliments bestowed upon _her_, while it was thought to +be "a pity that her sister was so _plain_ and unpretending in her +appearance!" + + + + +CHAPTER XII. + +ADA MONTROSE + +Aunt Charlotte, Anna, and myself were sitting in the parlor one +morning, about four weeks after our arrival in Boston, when the +door-bell rang, and the servant ushered in a young lady, who I +readily guessed was Ada Montrose, for there was about her an air of +languor, as if she had just arisen from a sick-bed. All doubt on +this point was soon settled by my aunt's exclaiming, as she hastened +to greet her, "Why, Ada, my child, this is a surprise. How do you +do?" + +The voice which answered was, I thought, the sweetest and most +musical I had ever heard, and yet there was in it something which +made me involuntarily shudder. I do not know that I believe in +_presentiments_, but sure I am that the moment I heard the tones of +Ada Montrose's voice, and looked upon her face, I experienced a most +disagreeable sensation, as if, in some way or other, she would one +day cross my path. She was beautiful--_she_ beautiful, that it +seemed impossible to detect a single fault either in her features or +complexion, though there was in the former an expression which made +me feel, when her eyes were fixed upon me, much as the bird must when +charmed by the rattlesnake. Do what I would, I could not rid myself +of the idea that she was my _evil_ genius, though how in any way she, +a proud southern belle, could ever affect me, a plain schoolgirl of +fourteen, was difficult to tell. She was, as I afterwards learned, +twenty-two years of age, but being rather diminutive in size, and +affecting a great deal of childish simplicity, she passed for four or +five years younger; and, indeed, she herself gave her age as +eighteen--looking up to Anna, who was really two years her junior, as +a very ancient, matronly sort of person, who was supposed to remember +as far back as the flood. + +Divesting herself of her warm wrappings, which she left upon the +floor, and shaking out her long curls, she informed my aunt that she +had come to spend the day, saying, by way of apologizing for not +having sent her word, that "she had ventured to come without an +invitation, she felt herself so perfectly at home." + +Of course Aunt Charlotte was delighted, and after assuring her of the +fact, she suddenly remembered our presence, and introduced us to the +lady as "Mr. Lee's nieces from the country." Not an instant did the +large brownish black eyes rest on me, for I was of little importance +compared with Anna, who the Thursday night previous had made her +first appearance in society, where her sweet face and fresh, +unstudied manners had produced something of a sensation, which had +undoubtedly reached the ear of the reigning belle. What her thoughts +were as she scanned my sister from head to foot, I do not know; but +as I watched her, I fancied I could detect an expression of mingled +scorn and surprise that one so unassuming should awaken an interest +in those who were accustomed to pay her homage. When she had +satisfied herself with Anna's personal appearance, she gave me a +hasty glance, and then drawing from her reticule a fanciful mat which +she was crocheting, she leaned back among the soft cushions of her +chair, and commenced talking to my aunt in a very artless, childish +manner, never noticing us in the least, except once when she asked me +to pull the bell rope, which was much nearer to her than me. Several +times I fancied she seemed to be listening for something, and when at +last I heard Herbert's voice in the hall and saw the deepening flush +on her cheek, I was sure that she felt more than a common interest in +him. + +In his usual good-natured, off-hand way he entered the room, tossing +into my lap a letter from brother Charlie, and telling Anna that her +_beau_ hadn't yet written; then, as his eye fell upon Ada, he started +back in evident surprise. Soon recovering himself, however, he said, +as he took the little snowflake of a hand, which she offered him-- + +"Why, Ad, who knew you were here?" + +"Not you, or you would have come sooner, I reckon;" said she, looking +up in his face in a confiding kind of way, which brought a frown to +Anna's brow. + +"Maybe I shouldn't have come so soon," he replied laughingly, at the +same time stealing a sidelong glance at Anna. + +"Here, sit right down by me," said Miss Montrose, as she saw him +looking for a seat. "I want to scold you for not calling on me +oftener when I was sick. You don't know how neglected I felt. Why +didn't you come, hey?" + +And she playfully pulled his hair, allowing her hand to remain some +time among his wavy locks. This was a kind of coquetry entirely new +to me, and I looked on in amazement, while Anna, more disturbed than +she was willing to acknowledge, left the room. When she was gone, +Ada said, letting her hand fall from Herbert's head to his arm, "Tell +me, is that the _Lee girl_, who attracted so much attention at Mrs. +G----'s party?" + +There was a look of gratified pride on Herbert's face as he answered, +"Yes--the same--don't you think her pretty?" + +They had probably forgotten my presence--Ada most certainly had, or +else she did not care; for she replied, "Pretty enough for some +tastes, I suppose, but she lacks polish and refinement. Is she at +all related to you?" + +"My stepfather's niece, that's all," replied Herbert, while Ada +quickly rejoined in a low tone, "Then, of course, _I_ shan't have to +cousin her." + +"Probably not," was Herbert's answer, which I interpreted one way and +Ada another. + +Her next remark was a proposal that Herbert should that afternoon +take her out to ride; but to this he made some objection; whereupon +she pretended to be angry, leaning back on the sofa and muttering +that "she didn't believe he cared a bit for her, and he might as well +confess it at once." + +Here the dinner bell rang, and offering his arm to the pouting +beauty, Herbert led her to the dining-room, where she was soon +restored to good humor by my aunt, who lavished upon her the utmost +attention, humoring every whim, and going so far as to prepare for +her _four_ different cups of black tea, which had been ordered +expressly for her, and to which she objected as being too hot, or too +cold--too weak or too strong. It took but a short time to show that +she was a _spoiled baby_, good-natured only when all the attention +was lavished upon her, and when her wishes were paramount to all +others. + +Dinner being over, Herbert did not, as was his usual custom, return +to the parlor; but taking his hat he went out into the street, in +spite of his mother's whispered effort to keep him at home. This, of +course, vexed the little lady, and after thrumming a few notes upon +the piano, she announced her intention of returning home, saying that +"she wished she had not come." At this moment the door-bell rang, +and some young ladies came in to call upon Anna. They seemed +surprised at finding Ada, there, and after inquiring for her health, +one of them said, "Do tell us, Ada, who that gentleman was that came +and went so slyly, without our ever seeing him? Mrs. Cameron says he +was from Georgia, and that is all we know about him. Who was he?" + +Ada started, and turning slightly pale, replied, "What do you mean? +I've seen no gentleman from Georgia. Where was he? and when was he +here?" + +"As much as three weeks or more ago," returned Miss Marvin. "He +stopped at the Revere House, and Mrs. Cameron, who boards there, got +somewhat acquainted with him." + +"Mrs. Cameron!" repeated Ada, turning alternately red and white. +"And pray what did she say?" + +I fancied there was a spice of malice in Miss Marvin's nature; at +least, she evidently wished to annoy Ada, for she replied, "She said +he was _ugly looking_, though quite _distingué_; that he came in the +afternoon, while she was in the public parlor talking with a lady +about _you_ and your engagement with Mr. Langley!" + +"The hateful old thing!" muttered Ada, while Anna turned white as +marble, and Miss Marvin continued--"When the lady had gone he begged +pardon for the liberty, but asked her if she knew you. Of course, +she told him she did, and gave him any further information which she +thought would please him." + +"Of course she did--the meddling widow!" again interrupted Ada; after +which Miss Marvin proceeded--"Mrs. Cameron didn't mean to do anything +wrong, for how could she guess that 'twould affect him in any way to +know you were engaged?" + +"And she told him I was engaged! It isn't so. I ain't," exclaimed +Ada, while the angry tears dropped from her glittering eyes. + +"What does that mean then?" asked Miss Marvin, laughingly, pointing +at the ring on Ada's finger. + +Her first impulse was to wrench it from her hand and cast it from +her, but she remembered herself in time, and growing quite calm, as +if to attribute her recent agitation to a different cause, she said: +"I wish people would attend to their own affairs, and let mine alone. +Suppose I am engaged--is that a reason why Mrs. Cameron should +discuss the matter with strangers? But what else did she say? And +where is the gentleman now?" + +"Gone home," answered Miss Marvin, glancing mischievously at her +companions. "He went the next morning, and she said he looked very +much disturbed, either at your illness or your engagement, the former +probably, and that is why I think it strange that he didn't stop to +see you; though maybe he did." + +"No, he didn't," chimed in Miss Marvin's sister, "for don't you know +she said he went to the theater?" + +All this time my interest in the unknown Georgian had been +increasing, and at this last remark I forgot myself entirely, and +started forward, exclaiming, "Yes, he was there, I saw him and spoke +with him too." + +The next moment I sank back upon the ottoman, abashed and mortified, +while Ada gave me a withering glance, and said scornfully, "_You_ +spoke to him! And pray, what did you say?" + +An explanation of what I said, would, I knew, oblige me to confess +the fainting fit, of which I was somewhat ashamed, and so I made no +reply; nor was any expected, I think, for without waiting for my +answer, Ada said to Miss Marvin, "Mrs. Cameron, of course, learned +his name, even if she had to ask it outright." + +"Yes, she made inquiries of the clerk, who wouldn't take the trouble +of looking on the book, but said he believed it was _Field_, or +something like that," returned Miss Marvin. + +As if uncertainty were now made sure, Ada turned so white that in +some alarm her young friends asked what they should do for her; but +she refused their offers of aid, saying, "it was only the heat of the +room, and she should soon feel better." + +"And is it the heat of the room which affects _you_, Miss Lee?" asked +one of the girls, observing for the first time the extreme pallor of +Anna's face. + +"Only a headache," was her answer, as she pressed her hand upon her +forehead. + +She was fearfully pale, and I knew it was no common thing which had +thus moved her, and when not long afterwards the young ladies left +us, I was glad, for I felt that both she and Ada needed to be alone. +The moment they were gone Anna left the parlor, while I, frightened +by the agonized expression of her face, soon followed her; but the +door of our room was locked, and it was in vain I called on her to +admit me, for she only answered in a voice choked with tears, "Go +away, Rosa; I would rather be alone." + +So I left her and returned to the parlor, where I found Ada weeping +passionately, while my aunt, who had not been present during the +conversation which had so affected her, was trying in vain to learn +the cause of her grief. + +"Nothing much," was all Ada would say, except that "she wanted to go +home." + +In the midst of our excitement, Herbert came in. He had repented of +his ungracious refusal to ride with Ada, and now the carriage stood +at the door, but she refused, saying petulantly, when urged by my +aunt to go, that "if she couldn't ride when she wanted to, she +wouldn't ride at all." + +"Where's Anna? she'll go, I know," said Herbert, glancing around the +room, and adding in a low tone, which reached my ear only, "and I'd +far rather she would." + +When I explained to him that she had a headache, and did not wish to +be disturbed, he exclaimed, "What ails all the girls to-day? +Anything the matter with you, Rose? If there isn't, put on your +bonnet and I'll show you the city, for I'm resolved upon riding with +somebody." + +As my aunt made no objection, I was soon ready and seated by the side +of Herbert, in the light vehicle, which he drove himself. I think he +exerted himself to be agreeable, for I never saw him appear so well +before, and in my heart I did not blame my poor sister for liking +him, as I was sure she did, while at the same time I wondered how he +could fancy Ada Montrose. As if divining my thoughts, he turned +suddenly towards me and said, "Rosa, how do you like Ada?" + +Without stopping to reflect, I replied promptly, "_Not at all_." + +"Frankly spoken," said he, and then for several minutes he was +silent, while I was trying to decide in my own mind whether or not he +was offended, and I was about to ask him, when he turned to me again, +saying, "We are engaged--did you know it?" + +I replied that I had inferred as much from the conversation which I +had heard between her and Miss Marvin, saying further, for his manner +emboldened me, that "I was surprised, for I did not think her such an +one as he would fancy." + +"Neither is she," said he, again relapsing into silence. At last, +rousing up, he continued, "I must talk to somebody, and as you seem +to be a sensible girl, I may as well make a clean breast, and tell +you all about it. Ada came up here from Georgia last spring, and the +moment mother saw her, she picked her out for her future +daughter-in-law. I don't know why it is, but mother has wanted me to +get married ever since I began to shave. I believe she thinks it +will make me steady; but I am steady enough now, lor I haven't drank +a drop in almost a year. I should, though, if Ada Montrose was my +wife. But that's nothing to the point. Mother saw her and liked +her. _I_ saw her and liked her well enough at first; for she is +beautiful, you know, and every man is more or less attracted by that. +They say, too, that she is wealthy, and though I would as soon marry +a poor girl as a rich one, provided I liked her, I shall not deny but +her money had its influence with me, to a certain extent. And then, +too, it was fun to get her away from the other young men who flocked +around her, like bees round a honey jar. But, to make a long story +short, we got engaged--Heaven only knows how; but engaged we were, +and then"---- Here he paused, as if nearing a painful subject, but +soon resuming the thread of his story, he continued: "And then I +stopped writing to Anna, for I would not be dishonorable. Do you +think she felt it?" + +The question was so unexpected, that I was thrown quite off my guard, +and replied, "Of course, she did; who wouldn't feel mortified to have +their letters unanswered?" + +"'Twas wrong, I know," said he. "I ought to have been man enough to +tell her how it was, and I did begin more than a dozen letters, but +never finished them. Do you think Anna likes me now, or could like +me, if I was not engaged, and she knew I'd never get drunk again?" + +Could he have seen her when first she learned that his affections +were given to another, he would have been sufficiently answered, but +he did not, and it was not for me, I thought, to enlighten him; so I +replied evasively, after which he continued, "As soon as I was +engaged to Ada, she began to exact so much attention from me, acting +so silly, and appearing so ridiculous that I got sick of it, and now +my daily study is how to rid myself of her; but I believe I've +commenced right. Can I make a confidante of you, and feel sure +you'll not betray me to any one, unless it is Anna?" + +I hardly knew how to answer, for if it was anything wrong which he +meditated, I did not wish to be in the secret, and so I told him; but +it made no difference, for he proceeded to say, "I shall never marry +Ada Montrose, never; neither would it break her heart if I shouldn't +for she's more than half tired of me now." + +I thought of the dark stranger, and felt that he was right, but I +said nothing, and he went on: "Sometimes I thought I'd go up to +Meadow Brook, tell Anna all about it, ask her to marry me, and so +settle the matter at once; but then I did not know but she might have +grown up raw, awkward, and disagreeable, so I devised a plan by which +I could find out. Mother would burn her right hand off, I believe, +to save me from a drunkard's grave, and when I wish to win her +consent to any particular thing, all I have to do is to threaten her +with the wine cup." + +"Oh, Herbert! how can you?" I exclaimed, for I was inexpressibly +shocked. + +"It's a way I've got into," said he, laughing at my rueful face. +"And when I suggested that Anna should spend the winter here, I +hinted to the old lady that if she didn't consent, I'd go off with a +party of young men on a hunting excursion. Of course she yielded at +once, for she well knew that if I joined my former boon companions, I +should fall." + +"And so we are indebted to you for our winter in Boston," said I, +beginning to see things in a new light. + +"Why no, not wholly," he answered; "mother consented much easier than +I supposed she would. The fact is, she's changed some since she was +at Meadow Brook. She's joined the Episcopal Church, and though that +in my estimation don't amount to much, of course, she has to do +better, for it wouldn't answer for a professor to put on so many +airs." + +As the daughter of a deacon, I felt it incumbent upon me to reprove +the thoughtless young man, but it did no good, for he proceeded to +say, "It's all true, and there's only one denomination who are +sincere in what they profess, and that's the Methodist. They carry +their religion into their whole life, while the Episcopalians, +Presbyterians, and Baptists sit on different sides of the fence, and +quarrel like fun about High Church and Low, Old School and New, close +communion and open communion, and all that sort of thing. I tell +you, Rose, if I am ever converted--and mother thinks I will be--I +shall be a roaring Methodist, and ride the Circuit at once!" + +I was unused to the world, and had never heard any one speak thus +lightly of religion; but I knew not what to say, so I kept silence, +while he continued, "But I am rambling from my subject. Mother _is_ +a different woman, if she does _read_ her prayers; and as she has +never known a word about my writing to Anna, she consented to her +coming, without much trouble, saying she would try to make it +pleasant for her, and proposing that you too should accompany her, +and go to school. You can't imagine how delighted I was to find Anna +what she is, and from the moment I met her in the parlor, Ada +Montrose's destiny, so far as I am concerned, was decreed; that is, +if I can secure your sister; and I think I shall have no difficulty +in so doing, for notwithstanding her affected coolness, it is easy to +see that I am not indifferent to her." + +It was in vain for me to argue that he was doing Ada a great wrong, +for he insisted upon saying that he was not. "She hadn't soul +enough," he said, "to really care for any one, and even if she had, +he would far rather commit suicide at once, than be yoked to her for +life; she was so silly, so fawning, so flat!" + +It was nearly dark when we reached home, and as the lamps were not +yet lighted in the parlor, I went immediately to my room, where I +found Anna lying upon the sofa, with her face buried in the cushions. +I knew she was not asleep, though she would not answer me, until I +had thrice repeated her name. Then lifting up her head, she turned +towards me a face as white as ashes, while she said, motioning to a +little stool near her, "Sit down by me, Rosa, I must talk to some +one, or my heart will break." + +Taking the seat, I listened while she told me how much she had loved +Herbert Langley--how she had struggled to overcome that love when she +thought he had slighted her, and how when she saw him daily in his +own home, it had returned upon her with all its former strength, +until there came to her the startling news that he was engaged to +another. "I cannot stay here," said she. "I am going home. I have +written to mother--see," and she pointed to a letter which lay upon +the table, and which she bade me read. It was a strange, rambling +thing, saying that "she should die if she stayed longer in Boston, +and that she was coming back to Meadow Brook." + +"You can't send this, Anna," said I, at the same time tossing it into +the grate, where a bright coal fire was burning. + +At this bold act of mine she expressed no emotion whatever, but +simply remarked, "I can write another or go without writing." + +"And you indeed love Herbert so much?" I said. + +"Better than my life--and why shouldn't I?" she replied. "He is all +that is noble and good." + +"Suppose he proves to be a drunkard?" I queried, looking her steadily +in the face, while she answered simply, "And what then? Would that +be harder to endure than a life without him?" + +I know not whether the spirit of prophecy was upon me, or whether I +felt a dim foreshadowing of my sister's wretched future, but from +some cause or other, I proceeded to picture to her the sorrows of a +drunkard's home and the utter degradation of a drunkard's wife, while +she listened shudderingly, saying when I had finished, "God save me +from such a fate!" + +There was the sound of footsteps in the hall, and Herbert's voice was +heard at the door, asking for admittance. He had often visited us in +our room, and now, without consulting Anna's wishes, I bade him +enter, going out myself and, leaving them alone. What passed between +them I never knew, but the supper table waited long for Herbert, and +was finally removed, my aunt thinking he had gone out, "to see Ada, +perhaps," she said, and then she asked me how I liked her, telling me +she was to be Herbert's wife, and that she hoped they would be +married early in the spring. + +I made her no direct reply, for I felt I was acting a double--nay, a +treble part, in being thus confided in by three, but I could not well +help it, and I hoped, by betraying neither party, to atone in a +measure for any deceit I might be practising. After that night there +was a great change in Anna, who became so lively and cheerful that +nearly all observed it, while Herbert's attentions to her, both at +home and abroad, were so marked as to arouse the jealousy of Ada, +who, while she affected to scorn the idea of being supplanted by +"that awkward Lee girl," as she called her, could not wholly conceal +her anxiety lest "the Lee girl" should, after all, win from her her +betrothed husband. Something of this she told my aunt, who, knowing +nothing of the true state of affairs, and having the utmost +confidence in her son's honor, laughed at her fears, telling her once +in my hearing, though she was unaware of my proximity, that, "however +much Herbert might flirt with Anna, he had been too well brought up +to think of marrying one so far beneath him." + +"But he does think of it--I most know he does," persisted Ada, +beginning to cry; "and I wish you'd send her home, won't you?" + +I did not hear my aunt's reply, but with Ada, my own heart echoed, +"send her home," for much as I liked Herbert, I shrank from the +thought of committing my gentle sister's happiness to his keeping, +and secretly I resolved upon writing to my father and acquainting him +with the whole; but, alas! I deferred it from day to day, until it +was too late. + + + + +CHAPTER XIII. + +THE FLIGHT. + +One bright morning about the middle of January, Herbert announced his +intention of going to Worcester with Anna, who, he said, wished to +visit the Lunatic Asylum, and as a young physician of his +acquaintance had just commenced practising there, it would be a good +opportunity for them to go over the building. To this my aunt made +no objection, merely proposing that Ada, too, should go. Afterwards +I remembered the peculiar look in Herbert's eye, as he replied, "Oh +fie! mother, Ada's nerves are not strong enough to endure it. She +can go with me some other time." + +Accordingly, when breakfast was over, Anna went up to her room to +make the necessary preparations for her ride, while I stood by and +gave her whatever assistance she needed. I observed that every +article which belonged to her was put in its proper place, but I gave +it no further heed, though I did wonder why she kissed me so often, +turning back even after she had reached the door to bid me another +good-by. Slowly the day passed away and night came on, dark, cold, +and stormy. Even now, as I write, I can recall to mind the gloom +which pervaded my spirits, as I listened to the sound of the sleet +and hail, which drove past the window, where I had watched so long +for their return. Seven, eight, nine, ten, was rung from more than +one church dome, and then we gave them up, for the shrill whistle of +the last train on which they would be likely to come, had long since +sounded in our ears. + +"They must have stayed somewhere; don't you think so?" said my aunt, +addressing her husband, who, man-like, was not in the least alarmed, +but sat conning his evening paper, nearer asleep than awake. + +"Of course they have," said he, looking up at his wife's inquiry. "I +wouldn't come in this storm, if I were in their places." + +That night I watered my pillow with tears, scarcely knowing why I +wept, save that I felt oppressed with a sense of desolation, as if +Anna was gone from me forever. The next day came and went, but it +brought no tidings of the missing pair, and half unconscious of what +she was doing, my aunt went from room to room, sometimes weeping and +again brightening up, as she enumerated the many things which might +have prevented their return. At evening, Ada came in, and my aunt +immediately began urging her to spend the night. This she did +willingly, seeming very anxious concerning the absence of Herbert, +and feeling, I was sure, a little suspicious that I might know more +of his whereabouts than I chose to tell, for once, when we were +alone, she turned towards me and very haughtily asked, if "I had any +idea where they were!" + +"None, whatever," said I, and she continued-- + +"Has it never occurred to you that this Anna Lee manifested +altogether too marked a preference for a gentleman whom she knew to +be engaged?" + +"The preference was mutual," I replied. "Herbert liked Anna, and +Anna liked Herbert." + +"And they have gone off to consummate that liking by a marriage," +interrupted Ada. + +"I do not know that they have," I returned; "but such a termination +of affairs would not surprise me." + +She was very pale, and there were tears in her eyes, but I thought +they arose more from a sense of mortification than from any real love +which she bore for Herbert Langley, and so I did not pity her as I +should otherwise have done. The next morning at breakfast both she +and my aunt (particularly the latter) looked weary and worn, as if +neither had slept at all during the night. My uncle, on the +contrary, seemed to be unmoved. He probably had an opinion of his +own, but whatever it was he kept it to himself, merely saying that if +the eastern mail brought no letter he would go in quest of them +himself. I know I could not study in my present excitement, and so I +asked permission to remain at home. Stationing myself at the window, +I watched anxiously for the return of Herod, who, as usual, had been +sent to the office. He came at last, bringing his pocket full of +letters, two of which were for me, one postmarked Meadow Brook, and +the other Albany! With a trembling hand I tore open the latter, +which was in my sister's handwriting. Glancing at the signature, my +fears were confirmed, for there stood the name of "Anna Langley" in +Herbert's bold dashing hand! + +"_She_ had refused to write it thus," he said, in a postscript, "and +so he had done it for her." + +The letter contained no apology from either for what they had done, +but merely informed me of the fact that instead of stopping in +"Worcester, they had gone straight on to Albany, which they reached +about six o'clock, going to the Delevan House, where in less than an +hour they were husband and wife; Herbert's old comrade, Tom Wilson, +accompanying them, and being a witness of the ceremony. What +affected me more unpleasantly than all the rest, was the derisive +manner in which Herbert spoke of Ada. + +"Give her my love," he said, "and tell her not to feel too badly. +I'd like well enough to marry her, too, but under the present laws a +man can't have two wives, unless he joins the Mormons. Maybe I shall +do that sometime, and then I'll remember _her_!" + +Of his mother he wrote differently, and though there was no cringing, +no acknowledgment of wrong, he spoke of her kindly and respectfully, +saying, "he hoped she would love his Anna for his sake." + +Of course I could not tell Ada what he said of her, neither was it +necessary, for guessing the truth from my face, she came up softly +behind me, and looking over my shoulder, read every word until she +came to the message intended for her. Then stamping her little foot, +she exclaimed passionately, "The villain, to insult me thus! As if +_I_, sprung from the best blood in Georgia, would stoop to become a +rival of that low-born country girl. No! By this act Herbert +Langley has shown that he is all unworthy of me, and I rejoice in my +escape, while I give him much joy with his highly refined and +polished bride." + +All my Lee temper, which is considerable, was roused, and turning +towards the lady, I exclaimed, "My sister, Miss Montrose, is as good +as you, aye, or as Herbert Langley either, and the news of her +marriage with him will carry sorrow to our home at Meadow Brook, +where they will say she has literally thrown herself away." + +"Very likely," returned Ada, sarcastically. "It is quite probable +that a _poor laborer_ will object to his daughter's marrying into one +of the first families in Boston." + +"He isn't a poor laborer," I replied, "and even if he were, he +_would_ object to his daughter's marrying a drunkard, for such +Herbert Langley has been and such he will be again." + +A deep groan came from the white lips of my aunt, and for the first +time since Ada's outbreak, I remembered that she was there. She did +not reprove me angrily, but in trembling tones she said, "Rose, +Herbert is _my_ child, _my_ boy, and it becomes not a girl of your +age to speak thus of him in the presence of his mother." + +I was humbled, and winding my arms about her neck, I asked +forgiveness for the harsh words I had spoken; and she forgave me, for +she meant to do right, and if sometimes she erred, it was owing more +to a weakness of the flesh than an unwillingness of the spirit. In +the midst of our excitement _Tom Wilson_ was ushered in. He had +returned in the same train which brought the letter, and had come to +give us any further information, which we might be desirous of +knowing. + +"When will Herbert come home?" was my aunt's first question, her +whole manner indicating how much interest she felt in the answer. + +"Not very soon," returned Tom. "He is tired of the city, he says, +and besides that he wishes to avoid the unpleasant remarks his +elopement will necessarily occasion." + +"More like he wishes to avoid introducing his bride into society, +which he knows has no wish to receive her," muttered Ada. + +Tom paid no attention to this spiteful speech, but continued, "He has +drawn his money from the ---- Bank, and with it he intends purchasing +a farm in the western part of New York." + +"An admirable plan," again interrupted Ada. "That Lee girl is just +calculated for a farmer's wife." + +Taken alone there was nothing particularly disagreeable in the three +words "_that Lee girl_;" but spoken by Ada Montrose they sounded +insultingly, and every time she uttered them, I felt my blood boil, +for _I_, too, was a _Lee girl_, and I was sure she included me in the +same contemptuous category. As Herbert had said, I did not think the +disappointment would break her heart. She was too angry for that, +and I believe now, as I did then, that most of her feeling arose from +the mortification of knowing that a "poor country girl," as she +called Anna, was preferred to herself. For half an hour or more Tom +Wilson and my aunt conversed together, she asking him at least a +dozen times "if he did not think Herbert could be induced to return." +At last, with quivering lips and flushed cheeks, as if it cost her +pride a great effort, she said, "Of course I mean _Anna_, too, when I +speak of Herbert's return. She is his wife, you say, and though I +might, perhaps, wish it otherwise, it cannot now be helped, and if he +only would come back to me, I should love her for his sake." + +In my heart I blessed her for these words, and mentally resolved to +leave no argument untried, which might bring the fugitives back. But +it could not be. Herbert was decided, he said. He meant to be a +farmer and live in the country, adding what he knew would silence his +mother sooner than aught else he could say, "that temptations for him +to drink were far greater in the city than in the country, and it was +for this reason partly that he preferred living in the latter place." + +And so my aunt yielded the point; but from the day of her son's +desertion, there was in her a perceptible change. Far oftener was +she found in the house of prayer, and less frequently was she seen in +places of amusement, while more than once I heard her in secret +asking that her wayward boy might be shielded from the great +temptation. Alas! for thee, poor Herbert Langley, sleeping in thine +early grave! There were prayers enough, methinks, to save thee; for +at the old Meadow Brook home, thou wert remembered in the early morn, +and not forgotten when at eve, my father knelt him down to pray. +Why, then, didst thou fall ere thy sun had reached the meridian of +manhood? Was it because in thine early training there was an error +which no after exertions could repair? We answer, Yes. The fault +was there, and little know they what they do, who set before their +sons the poisonous cup, and bid them, by their own example, drink and +die. How many young men, from the higher walks of life, now sleeping +in the dishonored grave of a drunkard, might at this moment be +filling some honorable position, had it not been for the wine or beer +drinking habit acquired in childhood by their own firesides, and at +their father's table? Look to it, then, you around whose +hearthstones promising sons are gathered, and if in the coming years +you would escape the sleepless nights, the bitter tears, and the +broken hearts of those whose children walk in the path, which, sooner +than all others, leadeth down to death, teach them, both by precept +and by practise, to "touch not, taste not, handle not," for therein +alone lieth safety. + + + + +CHAPTER XIV. + +TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS. + +Early in March, as I was one Saturday morning seated with my aunt in +her pleasant, cozy sewing-room, a little boy brought me a note from +Dell Clayton, in which she requested me, if possible, to spend the +afternoon with her. She was sick, she wrote, unable to sit up, and +what was worse than all, she was homesick and unhappy! Her aunt, she +said, was out of the city, and as she had no acquaintance, she +thought the sight of a familiar face would do her good. + +Aunt Charlotte, to whom I handed the note, consented to my going, and +immediately after dinner, which that day was served at an earlier +hour than usual, I started. Long and daily walks have always been to +me a luxury, and so, though I had been but a few months in Boston, I +was tolerably well acquainted with most of its localities, and had no +trouble in finding the once stylish, but now rather dilapidated and +gloomy looking block, in one part of which Dr. Clayton was keeping +house. Since the night when I met him at the theater, I had never +seen him, and all that I knew of him was that he had left the +Tremont. Subsequently, however, I heard the whole history of their +proceedings--partly from the doctor, partly from Dell, and partly +from other sources, and as a recital of it may not be wholly +uninteresting to my readers, I will give it before proceeding with a +description of my call. + +It seems that boarding at the Tremont was rather too expensive for a +physician, whose patients were not so numerous as to be troublesome, +and several times had the doctor proposed returning to his old place +in Sturbridge, where everything was cheaper; but to this Dell +objected, for she well knew it would be an admission that they could +not succeed in Boston, and against this her pride revolted. "People +at home," she reasoned, "would never know how matters really were, +and as long as she could keep up an appearance of gentility and +upper-ten-dom with her former friends, she should do so," preferring, +like many others, almost absolute want in the city, to plenty in the +country. From this, the reader is not to infer that the doctor was +extremely poor; for when he first went to Boston he was worth about +fifteen hundred dollars, which, in a country village, with a prudent +wife, would have surrounded him with all the comforts of life, +besides leaving him with something for that "rainy day," about which +everybody blessed with a careful grandmother has heard more or less. + +In the city of course, it needed a great deal of money to keep up the +kind of style upon which Dell insisted, and which, after all, was far +from satisfying her--it was so much inferior to the elegance she saw +around her; and as check after check of the doctor's little hoard was +drawn from the bank to meet their expenses, while but few would get +sick, or being so would send for him, his heart sank within him, and +without really meaning to do so, he began to wonder "when that old +grandmother would die!" Finding that he could not much longer pay +the enormous bills, which were presented to him weekly at the +Tremont, he decided at last upon housekeeping, and exercising in this +case his own judgment, in spite of the tears, sulks, and +remonstrances of his wife, he hired a house in an obscure street, +where the rents were much lower than in the more fashionable part of +the city. Very neatly he fitted it up, going rather beyond his +means, it is true, but depending a great deal upon the fast failing +health of Grandmother Barton, to set all things right. + +Everything was at last arranged, and with that comfortable feeling +which other men have experienced in similar circumstances, he took +his seat for the first time at his own table, forgetting in his +happiness that the smiling, handsome face of the lady opposite, in +blue merino morning gown and clean white linen collar, had ever worn +any look save that which now sat upon it. Breakfast was hardly over, +when the door-bell rang violently and a man appeared telling the +doctor that his services were required immediately by the wealthy +Mrs. Archer, who lived in an adjoining street, and who owned the +entire block in which he lived. + +Mrs. Archer belonged to that class of people who are always dying, +first with one fancied disease and then with another, in the end, +however, living much longer than those whose business it is to +minister to their wants. Being freakish and whimsical, she seldom +employed the same physician longer than a year, but during that time +a man with limited wants was sure of a livelihood, for his services +were required every day, and the remuneration for the same was so +prompt and liberal as to make her patronage much sought after, +particularly by new practitioners. Having taken a violent fancy to +Dr. Clayton when he bargained with her for the house, she had decided +henceforth to employ him, if on trial he proved to be all she wished. + +The doctor was well aware of her peculiarities, and for several days +past had indulged a faint hope that she might favor him with a call. +This she had now done, and very eagerly he prepared to visit her. As +he reached his gates he was met by a boy who brought a telegraphic +despatch from Wilbraham, saying that _Grandma Barton was dead_! Yes, +the old lady was gone, and Dell was undoubtedly the heiress of ten +thousand dollars at least, and probably more, for her grandmother +bore the reputation of being miserly, and rumor said that twice ten +thousand was nearer the actual sum of her possessions. To ascertain +the truth as soon as possible was the doctor's great desire, and as +the next train bound for the east started in about two hours, he +decided to go at once, though the funeral was not to take place for +two or three days. + +Suddenly Mrs. Archer's message occurred to him, but matters were now +changed--he was a rich man, and as such Mrs. Archer's patronage was +not of vital importance. Still it would hardly do to slight her, and +rather unwillingly he bent his steps towards her dwelling. When +there he appeared so abrupt and absent-minded, telling her there was +nothing whatever the matter with her as he could see, that the good +lady was wholly disgusted, and the moment he was gone, she despatched +the servant for another physician, who, possessing more tact, and not +having recently come into the possession of a fortune, told her with +a grave, concerned look, that "he never saw anything like her +case--it really baffled his skill, though he thought he _could_ cure +her, and it would give him pleasure to try." + +Of course he was employed, and just as Dr. Clayton and Dell were +stepping into the omnibus, which took them to the dépôt, a note was +handed to the former, saying his services were no longer needed by +Mrs. Archer. Without giving it a thought, the doctor crushed the +note into his pocket, and then springing into the carriage, took his +seat by Dell, to whom he was unusually attentive, for she had risen +in his estimation full _ten thousand dollars' worth_, and what man, +for that sum of money, would not occasionally endure a cross look, or +a peevish word! Not the doctor most certainly; and when on reaching +the dépôt, they found that the cars would not leave for half an hour +or more, he could not resist her entreaties to go with her to a +jeweler's, on ---- street, where the day before she had "seen such a +beautiful set of cameos, earrings, bracelet, and pin to match--then, +too, they were so cheap, only $50. She knew he would buy them!" + +'Twas in vain for him to say that he had not fifty dollars for she +replied, that "he could take it from the bank and replace it when she +got her fortune;" adding, "I'll give you a hundred in place of it: so +gratify me this once, that's a dear, good man." + +Of course, the _dear good man_ was persuaded as many another dear +good man has been, and will be again by a coaxing woman. The cameos +were bought, and in the best of humor the young couple took their +seats in the cars which were soon bearing them swiftly towards the +house of death. Very pleasant were the doctor's reflections as the +train sped on over valley and plain: he was a fortunate, happy man, +and if when they paused at the Meadow Brook station he thought for an +instant of the girl Rosa Lee, her memory was to him like an idle +dream, which had passed away in the _golden_ beams of day. Arrived +at Wilbraham dépôt, they took a carriage for the village, which is +about two miles or more from the railroad. + +The old brown shutters of the large wooden building, where Mrs. +Barton had lived and died, were closed, and about the house there was +no sign of life. But this was hardly different from what it had been +during the old lady's life, for she was one who lived mostly within +herself, seldom seeing company, though always sure to go whenever she +was invited. Exceedingly penurious, she stinted her household to the +last degree of endurance, and denied herself even the comforts of +life, while her last request had been that her body might be suffered +to remain in her sleeping-room, so as not to litter up the parlor, or +wear the carpet! + +At the head of the family was Mabel Warrener, a poor young girl, who +for three years had lived with Mrs. Barton in the capacity of half +waiting-maid, half companion, and to her the neighbors now looked for +directions. Anxious to pay all due deference to the wishes of her +late mistress, Mabel at first said, "Let the body remain where it +is;" but when she reflected that "the fashionable Mrs. Clayton from +Boston," with her proud husband (for so were they considered), would +probably be there, she changed her mind, and the deceased was carried +into the dark, damp parlor, where a fire had not been kindled for +more than a year. The same was also true of the chamber above, which +was designed for the doctor and his lady, the latter of whom shivered +as she entered it, rather haughtily bidding Mabel, who accompanied +her, "to make a fire there as soon as possible, for she was not +accustomed to cold rooms, and should freeze to death." + +Very meekly Mabel complied, not only with this requisition, but with +fifty others from the same source; for Dell, thinking she was now +mistress of the house, took upon herself many airs, ordering this, +that, and the other, until the neighbors, quite disgusted, left poor +Mabel alone, with the exception of the deaf old woman, who ruled in +the kitchen as cook. The morning following the arrival of the +doctor, Capt. Thompson, wife, and son came out from Sturbridge to +attend the funeral; for though they were in no way connected with +Mrs. Barton, they knew her well, and wished to pay her this last +tribute of respect. Then, too, Mrs. Thompson was very desirous of +seeing Dell, who was now an heiress, and as such entitled to +attention. Long they talked together concerning the future, Dell +telling how she meant "to fix up the old rookery for a summer +residence," and inviting her sister-in-law to spend as much time with +her as she possibly could. The cameos were next duly inspected, +admired, tried on, and then the two went down to the room below, and +turning back the thin muslin which shaded the face of the dead, gazed +upon the pinched, stony features which seemed so much to reproach +them for their cold-hearted selfishness, in thus planning ways and +means by which to spend her hoarded wealth even before she was buried +from their sight. + +That afternoon there was heard a tolling bell, and along procession +moved slowly to the churchyard, where the words "ashes to ashes--dust +to dust," and the sound of the hard frozen earth, rattling upon the +coffin-lid, broke the solemn stillness, but disturbed not the rest of +those, who, henceforth, would be the fellow-sleepers of her now +committed to the grave. When the party of mourners had returned to +the house, the doctor began to speak of the necessity there was for +his returning immediately to the city, at the same time hinting to +Capt. Thompson that "if there was a _will_, he would like to see it." + +Mabel Warrener, who was supposed to know more than any one else +concerning Mrs. Barton's affairs, was called in and questioned, she +replying that "her mistress, one day, about two weeks before her +death, had said to her that if, after her death, an inquiry should be +made concerning her will, it could be found in the private drawer of +her secretary, where was also a letter for Mrs. Clayton." Both of +these were brought out, and with her handkerchief over her eyes, Dell +listened while Capt. Thompson read aloud the astounding fact that the +entire possessions of Mrs. Barton, amounting to $15,000, were given +to MABEL WARRENER, who, having had no suspicion whatever of the +fortune in store for her, fainted away, and was borne from the room, +as was also Dell; while the doctor, it was confidently asserted, went +out behind the woodshed and actually _vomited_, so great was his +disappointment! Soon rallying, however, both he and his wife +declared it a fraud, accusing the still unconscious Mabel of +treachery, and it was not until the lawyer who had drawn the will was +produced, that they could be convinced. Suddenly remembering her +letter, Dell broke it open and found therein the reasons for this +most unaccountable freak. Always peculiar and naturally jealous, +Mrs. Barton had felt piqued that she was not invited to Dell's +wedding, which, considering that she was spending the summer in +Albany at the time when it took place, was not very remarkable. +Then, too, she was not consulted, and she didn't believe in doctors, +they killed more than they cured; but the head and front of the +offense seemed to be that instead of hiring two or three rooms and +keeping house in a small, economical way, they _boarded_ at the +Tremont, where Dell had nothing to do but "to change her dress, eat, +sleep, and _laze_"--so the letter ran--"and she (Mrs. Barton) would +not suffer a penny of her money to go for the support of such +extravagance: she preferred giving it to Mabel Warrener, who was a +prudent, saving girl, and would take care of it; while the paltry +doctor would spend it for cigars, fast horses, patent leather boots, +and all sorts of fooleries." + +The letter ended with an exhortation to Dell to "go to work and earn +her own living, as her grandmother had done before her." + +The doctor's reflections, as he rode back to Boston, were not of the +most enviable nature; and who can wonder if he was rather testy +towards his wife, who retorted so angrily as to bring on quite a +sharp quarrel, which was prevented from being heard by the roar of +the machinery; and if at _Meadow Brook_ he _did_ think again of Rosa +Lee, half fancying that 5,000 divided by 13, if shared with _her_, +might be preferable to _nothing_ divided by _nothing_, shared with +Dell; who can blame him? Not _I_, most certainly. Wasn't he +terribly disappointed? Hadn't he just lost $15,000, to say nothing +of a patient, whose patronage would have insured him a living for at +least a year, besides introducing him into a broader field of +practise; and if the cameo earrings _were_ rather becoming to the +dark hair and black eyes of his wife, did that in any way compensate +him for the fifty dollars which stood on the Cr. side of his +bank-book? Still, I see no good reason why, after their arrival home +at a late hour of the night, they should sit up for more than an hour +in a cold, cheerless room, telling each other--the one that she +wished she had never married him, for "he alone stood in the way of +her inheritance;" while the other replied, that "but for her +extravagance he should now have had $1,500 in the bank instead of +five hundred." + +Wretched couple! Their history is like that of many others, who +marry without a particle of love, or at most, only a passing fancy. +Had Dell chosen, she could in time have won the affection of her +husband, but being naturally selfish and exacting, she expected from +him every attention; while in return she seldom gave him aught save +cross looks and peevish words, complaining that he did not treat her +now as he once had done. As long as the doctor had a fortune in +expectancy, he bore his wife's ill humor tolerably well, but now that +hope was gone, his whole being seemed changed, and Dell was not often +obliged to quarrel alone. + +At last, broken in spirits, and being really sick, she had sent for +me, as I have before stated. I found her in bed, propped up on +pillows, her shining hair combed back, and her large black eyes +seeming blacker than ever, from contrast with her colorless cheek. +All her old haughtiness was gone, and the moment she saw me she +stretched her arms towards me, and bursting into tears, exclaimed, +"Oh, Rose, I am so glad you have come. I was afraid you wouldn't, +for I knew your aunt was very aristocratic, and I thought she might +not be willing to have you visit poor, obscure people like us." + +There was much of bitterness in the last part of this speech, and it +grated harshly upon my feelings; but it was like her, I knew, and she +had only judged my aunt by what she well knew she should herself be +in a similar position; so I took no notice of it, save to assure her +that Aunt Charlotte was perfectly willing I should come, while at the +same time I expressed my sorrow at finding her so unwell, and asked +"what was the matter." + +"Oh, nothing much," said she. "I have no particular disease, unless +it be one of the mind, and that you know is not easily cured." + +I made no answer to this; but after a moment's silence, I ventured to +inquire for her husband. Instantly there came a bright glow to her +cheek, as she replied, "Oh, he is as well as could be expected, +considering his terrible disappointment." + +Of course I asked what disappointment, whereupon she proceeded to +narrate a part of what I have already told to my readers, withholding +nearly all the points wherein she had been to blame, and dwelling +with apparent delight upon the faults of her husband, who, she +protested, was wholly selfish and avaricious. "I know," said she, +"why he married me; 'twas for the sake of the few dollars he thought +my grandmother would leave me, and now being disappointed in that, he +cares no more for me than he does for you--no, nor half so much, for +he always preferred you to me, and I wish I had let you have him, for +you liked him, I know, better than I did." + +As she said this, she looked me steadily in the face, as if to read +my inmost soul. I felt provoked, for I now thought of my former +affection for the doctor as something of which I was _a little +ashamed_, and I did not much like to be reminded of it by his wife. +So I ventured to say that "whatever I might once have felt for her +husband, it was all over now, and I could think of no greater +misfortune than that of being his wife!" + +Now, I should know better than to speak thus to any woman concerning +her husband, for however much she may talk against him herself, she +certainly has no desire or expectation that her listener will agree +with her. On this occasion, Dell grew angry at once, telling me "I +needn't speak so lightly of her husband--he was good enough for +anybody," while at the same time she muttered something about "sour +grapes!" + +I was taken quite aback, and remained silent, until she at last said, +laughingly, "I don't wish to quarrel with you, Rose. Pardon any ill +humor I may have manifested. I get nervous and fidgety staying here +alone so much." + +"Is not the doctor with you sometimes?" I inquired. + +"Oh, yes; once in a great while," said she; "but he can bear the +atmosphere of any other sick-room better than mine. So he's +off--hunting up patients, I suppose. I tell him he gets his living +that way, and a poor living it bids fair to be. Between you and me, +Rose," she continued, growing excited, "he is _shiftless_, if you +know what that means, and we are worth to-day just as much as we ever +shall be." + +I felt that she wronged him, and told her so, at the same time +enumerating his many good qualities, while she listened, evidently +better pleased than when I had spoken lightly of him. In the midst +of our conversation there was a familiar step in the hall, and a +moment after the doctor himself entered the room. He looked +care-worn and haggard; but at the sight of me, whose presence +surprised him, his face quickly lighted up, and there was much of his +olden manner as he took my hand and expressed his pleasure at finding +me there. 'Twas but for a moment, however, for catching the eye of +his wife, he became almost instantly reserved, and seating himself +near a window, he pretended to be much occupied with a book, which I +accidentally discovered was wrong side up! It was strange how much +waiting-upon Dell suddenly needed. Heretofore she had been very +quiet, saying she did not wish for anything, but now that he was +there, her pillows must be turned, her head must be bathed, the +window must be opened and then shut, while with every other breath, +she declared him to be "the awkwardest man she ever saw," saying +once, "she didn't wonder he had no more practise if he handled all +his patients as roughly as he did her." + +After this unkind speech, the doctor made no farther attempt to +please her, but left her side and returned to his seat by the window. +Ere long the supper bell rang. I had not supposed it was so late, +and starting up announced my intention of going home, but to this +neither the doctor nor Dell would listen, both of them insisting upon +my staying to tea; she, because she felt that common civility +required it, and he, because he really wished it. Once out of her +sight, he was himself again, and playfully drawing my arm within his, +he led me to the dining-room, placing me at the head of the table, +where Dell was accustomed to sit, while he took the seat opposite. +As we sat there thus, I shall not say that there came to my mind no +thought of what might have been, but I can say, and truthfully too, +that such thoughts brought with them naught of pain; for though Dr. +Clayton had once possessed the power of swaying me at his will, that +time had gone by, and he was to me now only a friend, whom I both +liked and pitied, for I knew he was far from being happy. Once, when +I handed him his second cup of tea, he said, smiling upon me, "It +makes me very happy to see you there--in that seat." + +I made no answer; and, as if thinking he had said what he ought not, +he immediately changed the conversation, and began to question me of +my studies, etc., asking me among other things, if I went to +dancing-school. Instantly I remembered Mrs. Ross's slippers with the +little wads of cotton, and I laughed aloud. It seems his thoughts +took the same direction, for he, too, laughed so loudly that when we +returned to Dell's room, she rather pettishly inquired what we found +to amuse us so much, saying "she hadn't seen the doctor look so +pleased since--since, well, since grandma's death," she finally +added, at the same time glancing at him to witness the effect of her +words. + +He turned very white about the mouth, and I am quite certain I heard +the word "_thunder!_" At all events, his eyes flashed angrily upon +the provoking woman, who again inquired at what we were laughing. +When I told her, she too laughed, saying, "Oh, yes, I remember it +well, and have sometimes thought that I owe my present position to +that awkward misstep of yours." + +"I am very glad I fell, then," said I, rather impatiently, while I +threw on my hood and shawl, preparatory to going home. + +"Hadn't you better call an omnibus for her?" asked Dell of her +husband, who was putting on his overshoes. + +"I am going round with her myself," he answered. "I have a patient +on the way," and he hurried from the room ere she could say anything +further. + +It was a beautiful moonlight night, and as I took his arm I recalled +the time when once before we had walked thus together. I think he +remembered it too, for he asked me "if I ever visited Pine District?" + +"Not often," I replied; and he continued to say, that +"notwithstanding that it was little more than a year and a half since +he first saw me there, it seemed to him an age," adding; "and it is +not strange either, for I have passed through many trials since then." + +To this I made no reply, and ere long he proceeded to speak further +of himself, and of his disappointment, first with regard to his +business, and next with regard to his domestic relations, which he +gave me to understand were not particularly happy. Very delicately +and carefully he handled the latter subject, speaking not one-half so +harshly of Dell as she had spoken of him. Still I felt that he had +no right thus to speak to me, and so I told him. + +"I know it, Rose," he returned. "I know it all; but for this once +you must hear me, and I will never trouble you again. I committed a +great error in marrying one, while my heart belonged to +another--stay," he continued, as I was about to interrupt him. "You +must hear me out. It is not of my love for _that other_ that I would +speak; but, Rose, I would know how far I have wronged you. _Did_ you +love me, and had I asked you to share my home, when at a suitable +age, would you have done so?" + +He was very pale, and the arm on which my hand was resting, trembled +violently, but grew still when he heard my answer, which was, "I +_did_ love you, but 'twas a childish love and quickly passed away. +And were you now free as you once were, I could be to you nothing +save a friend." + +There was a mixture of disappointment and pleasure on his face; but +he replied, "I am glad that it is so, and shall now feel happier, for +the hardest part of all was the though that possibly _you, too_, +might suffer." + +"Not at all," I answered, adding, "it would be foolish to break my +heart for one man, when there are so many in the world." + +This I said with bitterness, for I remembered the time when I had +wept in the shadowy woods of Meadow Brook, and if for a moment I +experienced a feeling of satisfaction in knowing that what _I_ +suffered then, _he_ was suffering now, I can only plead woman's +nature as an apology. 'Twas but for a moment, however, and then, +casting off all such feelings, I spoke to him kindly of his wife, +telling him he could be happy with her if he tried, and that if he +were not, it was probably as much his fault as hers. Brighter days, +too, would come, I said, when his practise would not be limited to +_three_ patients, one of whom was too poor to pay, and another was +already convalescent, while the third was in the last stages of her +disease, and would need his services but a few days longer. + +"You are my good angel, Rose," said he, when at last we reached my +uncle's door, "and your words inspire me with courage. Come and see +us often, for the sight of you does me good, and God knows how much I +stand in need of sympathy. Farewell." + +He pressed my hand, and hastily raising it to his lips, turned away, +dreading, as I well knew, a return to the sick-room, where naught +would greet him save reproachful complaints, and where the dark eyes, +which had first won his admiration, would flash angrily upon him. In +the hall, I stood for a time, pondering in my mind some way by which +I could assist him, and I even thought of feigning sickness myself +for the sake of adding another patient to his list! But this, I +knew, he would easily detect, and possibly he might misconstrue my +motive for so doing, and this project was abandoned, and I entered +the parlor in quest of my aunt, who, I learned from one of the +servants, was in her own room, suffering from a severe headache. She +had taken a violent cold, which, by the next morning, had developed +itself into a species of influenza, at that time prevailing in the +city. Added to this was a general debility and prostration of the +nerves, brought on by her recent trouble and anxiety concerning +Herbert. + +My uncle, who was always alarmed when she was ill, wished for medical +advice; but to this she objected, as Dr. Mott, the family physician, +was absent, and she knew of no other, whom she dare trust. Instantly +I thought of Dr. Clayton. If she could be prevailed upon to employ +him, I knew she would like him, for I could testify to his extreme +kindness in a sick-room, and good nursing was what she most needed. +When I suggested that he should be called, she at first refused; but +before night, being much worse, she consented, and never had I +experienced a moment of greater happiness than when I hastened to the +kitchen with a message for John, who was to go immediately for Dr. +Clayton. Then taking my uncle aside, I explained to him the +straitened circumstances of the young physician, hinting to him that +prompt remuneration for his services would undoubtedly be acceptable. + +"Yes, yes, I understand," said he; "you want me to pay him to-day." + +Here we were interrupted by the ringing of the doorbell. Dr. Clayton +had come, and the result was as I had hoped. My aunt was greatly +pleased--he was so kind and gentle, humoring all her fancies, and +evincing withal so much judgment and skill that she felt confidence +in his abilities; and when he was gone, expressed herself as +preferring him even to Dr. Mott, "who," she said, "was getting old +and cross." + +As he was leaving the house, my uncle placed in his hand a +five-dollar bill, whereupon the doctor turned very red, and asked if +he were not expected to call again. + +"Certainly, certainly," said my uncle, who, manlike, hadn't the least +bit of tact; "keep coming until Charlotte is well. I only paid you +for this call to please Rosa." + +Instead of the displeased, mortified look, which I expected to see on +the doctor's face, there was an expression of deep gratitude, as he +turned his eyes towards me; and I thought there was a moisture in +them, which surprised me, for I did not then know how much that five +dollars was needed: it being the exact amount requisite for the +payment of the girl, who refused to remain with them another day +unless her wages were forthcoming. To such straits are people, +apparently in easy circumstances, sometimes reduced. + +For more than a week my aunt was confined to her room, while the +doctor came regularly, always staying a long time, and by his +delicate attentions winning golden laurels from his patient, who was +far better pleased with him than with the fussy old man, who, being +always in a hurry, only stopped for a moment, while he looked at her +_tongue_, felt her _pulse_, and recommended _blistering_ and +_bleeding_, with a dose of _calomel_, neither of which Dr. Clayton +believed to be a _saving ordinance_, and indispensable to the +_comfort_ and recovery of his patients. By this, I do not mean +anything derogatory to the good old custom of tormenting folks to +death before their time, but having a faint remembrance of certain +_blisters_, which, together with _cabbage leaves_ and the _tallowed +rags_, once kept me in a state of torture for nearly a week, to say +nothing of the _sore mouth_, the _loose teeth_, and the +tightly-bandaged arm, I cannot help experiencing a kind of nervous +tremor at the very mention of said prescriptions. + +Dr. Clayton's attendance upon my aunt was a great benefit to him, as, +through its means, he became known to several of the higher circle, +who began to employ him, so that by the last of May, the time when I +left Boston for Meadow Brook, he had quite a large practise. For +some reason or other, Mrs. Archer, too, sent for him again; and as he +had now no ten thousand dollars in prospect, he succeeded in pleasing +the whimsical lady, thereby securing her patronage for a year at +least. Here, for a time, I leave him, while I go back to the dear +old home at Meadow Brook, over which a shadow, dark and heavy, was +brooding. + + + + +CHAPTER XV. + +THE OLD HOMESTEAD. + +"Meadow Brook Station! Stop five minutes for refreshments!" shouted +the conductor, and alighting from the noisy, crowded cars, I stood +once more in my own native town, gazing with a feeling of delight +upon the sunny hills, dotted over with the old-fashioned gable-roofed +houses, and upon the green, grassy meadow, through which rolled the +blue waters of the Chicopee. I had not stood thus long, when a broad +hand was laid upon my shoulder, and the next instant my arms were +around the neck of my father, who, I thought, had changed much since +last I saw him; for his face was thin and pale, while threads of +silver were scattered through his soft brown hair. + +It was the loss of Anna, I fancied; and when we at last were seated +in the buggy, and on our way home, I hastened to speak of her, and to +tell him of the favorable report we heard of Herbert. But naught +which I said seemed to rouse him; and at last I, too, fell into the +same thoughtful mood, in which even old Sorrel shared, for he moved +with his head down, scarcely once leaving the slow, measured walk he +had first assumed. When, at last, we reached the hill-top, from +which could be seen the Homestead, with its maple trees in front, and +long row of apple trees, now in full bloom, in the rear, I started +up, exclaiming, "Home, sweet home! It never looked half so beautiful +to me before." + +In a moment, however, I checked myself; for my father groaned aloud, +while his face grew whiter than before. + +"What is it, father," I asked; "are they sick or dead?" + +"Neither, neither," he replied, at the same time chirruping to old +Sorrel, who pricked up his ears and soon carried us to the door of +our house, where I was warmly greeted by all. + +And still there was in what they said and did an air of melancholy +which puzzled me; and when I was alone with Lizzie, I asked her the +cause why they looked so sad? Bursting into tears, she replied, +"This is not our home any longer. We must leave it, and go, we don't +know where--to the _poor-house_, pa sometimes says, when he feels the +worst, and then grandma cries so hard--oh, it's dreadful!" + +"And why must we leave it?" I asked; and Lizzie answered, "Pa has +signed notes for Uncle Thomas, who has failed, and now the homestead +must be sold to pay his debts--and they so proud, too!" + +It was as Lizzie had said. Uncle Thomas Harding was my mother's +brother, who lived in Providence, in far greater style, it was said, +than he was able to support. Several times had Aunt Harding visited +us, together with her two daughters, Ellen and Theodosia. They were +proud, haughty girls, and evidently looked upon us, their _country +cousins_, with contempt; only tolerating us, because it was pleasant +to have some place in the country where to while away a few weeks, +which, in the heated, dusty city, would otherwise hang heavily upon +their hands. On such occasions, they made themselves perfectly at +home, and somehow or other managed to have my mother feel that she +was really indebted to them for the honor they conferred upon her, by +calling her Aunty, by appropriating to themselves the greater portion +of the house, by skimming the cream from the pans of milk, by eating +up the pie she had saved for us children when we came hungry and +cross from school, and by keeping old Sorrel constantly in the +harness, or under the saddle. + +In return for all this, they sometimes gave us an old collar, a silk +apron, a soiled ribbon, or broken parasol--and once, when my parents +visited them, they sent us a trunk full of rubbish, among which was +Fielding's "Tom Jones!" This my grandmother cautiously took from the +trunk with the _tongs_ and threw into the fire, thereby creating in +me so great a desire for a knowledge of its contents, that, on the +first occasion which presented itself, I gratified my curiosity, +feeling when I had done so, that my grandmother was right in +disposing of the volume as she did. Dear old lady! her aversion to +everything savoring of fiction was remarkable, and when not long +since a certain _medium_ informed me that she, my grandmother, was +greatly distressed to learn that I had so far degenerated as to be +_writing a book_, I thought seriously of giving up my project at +once, and should probably have done so, had not another medium of +still greater power than the first received a communication, stating +that, after due reflection, my grandmother had concluded that "I +might continue the story called Meadow Brook, provided I showed off +my Aunt Harding and her two daughters in their true character." So, +as a dutiful child, it becomes me to tell how my father, who was +warmly attached to my Uncle Thomas, lent him money from time to time, +and signed notes to the amount of several thousand dollars, never +once dreaming that in the end he would be ruined, while my uncle, +influenced by his more crafty wife, managed in some unaccountable way +to maintain nearly the same style of living as formerly; and if his +proud daughters ever felt the ills of poverty, it was certainly not +apparent in the rich silks and costly furs which they continued to +sport. + +It was a terrible blow to us all, but upon no one did it fall so +heavily as upon my father, crushing him to the earth, and rendering +him nearly as powerless as is the giant oak when torn from its parent +bed by the wrathful storm. The old homestead was endeared to him by +a thousand hallowed associations. It was the home of his boyhood, +and around the cheerful fires, which years ago were kindled on its +spacious hearthstone, he had played with those who long since had +passed from his side, some to mingle in the great drama of life, and +others to that world where they number not by years. There, too, in +his early manhood had he brought his bride, my gentle mother, and on +the rough bark of the towering maples, by the side of his own and his +brother's names, were carved those of his children, all save little +Jamie, who died ere his tiny fingers had learned the use of knife or +hammer. No wonder, then, that his head grew dizzy and his heart sick +as he thought of leaving it forever; and when at last the trying +moment came, when with trembling hand he signed the deed which made +him homeless, who shall deem him weak, if he laid his weary head upon +the lap of his aged mother and wept like a little child? + +A small house in the village was hired, and after a few weeks' +preparation, one bright June morning, when the flowers we had watched +over and tended with care were in bloom, when the robins which, year +after year had returned to their nests in the maple tree, were +singing their sweetest songs, and when the blue sky bent gently over +us, we bade adieu to the spot, looking back with wistful eye until +every trace of our home had disappeared. Farewell forever to thee, +dear old homestead, where now other footsteps tread and other +children play than those of "auld lang syne." The lights and shadows +of years have fallen upon thee since that summer morn, and with them +have come changes to thee as well as to us. The maple, whose +branches swept the roof above my window, making oft sad music when +tuned by the autumn wind, has been cut away, and the robins, who +brought to us the first tidings of spring, have died or flown to +other haunts. "The moss-covered bucket which hung in the well" has +been removed; the curb, whose edges were worn by childish hands, is +gone; while in place of the violets and daisies which once blossomed +on the grassy lawn, the thistle and the burdock now are growing, and +the white rose-bush by the door, from whence they plucked the buds +which strewed the coffin-bed of our baby brother, is dead. Weeds +choke the garden walks, and the moss grows green and damp on the old +stone wall. Even the brook which ran so merrily past our door has +been stopped in its course, and its sparkling waters, bereft of +freedom, now turn the wheel of a huge saw-mill, with a low and sullen +roar. All is changed, and though memory still turns fondly to the +spot which gave me birth, I have learned to love another home, for +where my blessed mother dwells, 'tis surely home to me. By her side +there is, I know, a vacant chair, and in her heart a lonely void, +which naught on earth can fill; but while she lives, and I know that +there is in the world for me a mother and a mother's love, can I not +feel that I have indeed a home, though it be not the spot where first +she blessed me as her child? + + + + +CHAPTER XVI. + +"OUT WEST." + +What a train of conflicting ideas do those two words oftentimes +awaken, bringing up visions of _log-cabins_, ladder stairs, _wooden +latches_, fried hominy and maple sugar, to say nothing of the +hobgoblins in the shape of bears, rattlesnakes, wolves, and "folks +who don't know anything;" the latter being universally considered the +"staple production" of every place bearing the name of "out West." +Even western New York, with her hundreds of large and flourishing +villages, her well cultivated farms, her numerous schools, her +educated, intelligent people, and her vast wealth, is looked upon +with distrust by some of her eastern neighbors, because, forsooth, +her boundaries lie farther towards the setting sun, and because she +once bore the title of "way out west in the Genesees." + +Of course I speak only from observation and personal experience; for +at Meadow Brook, ten years ago, many fears were expressed lest Anna +should miss the society to which she had been accustomed; and when +after the sale of the homestead, she wrote, asking me to come and +live with her, I hesitated, for to me it seemed much like burying +myself from the world, particularly as she chanced to mention that +the schoolhouse was a log one, and that there were in the +neighborhood several buildings of the same material. Never having +seen anything of the kind, I could not then understand that there is +often in a log house far more comfort and genuine happiness than in +the stateliest mansion which graces Fifth Avenue or Beacon Street; +and that the owners of said dwellings are frequently worth their +thousands, and only wait for a convenient opportunity to build a more +commodious and imposing residence. + +At last, after many consultations with my parents, I concluded to go, +and about the middle of November I again bade adieu to Meadow Brook; +and in company with a friend of my father, who was going West, I +started for Rockland, N.Y., which is in the western part of Ontario +County, and about fourteen miles from Canandaigua, at which place +Herbert was to meet me. I had never before been west of Springfield, +and when about sunset I looked out upon the delightful prospect +around Albany, I felt a thrill of delight mingled with a feeling of +pain, for I began to have a vague impression that possibly +Massachusetts, with all her boasted privileges, could not outrival +the Empire State. It was dark, and the night lamps were already +lighted when we entered the cars at Albany; for we were to ride all +night. In front of us was an unoccupied seat, which I turned towards +me for the better accommodation of my band-box, which contained my +new bonnet; and I was about settling myself for a nap, when a +gentleman and lady came in, the latter of whom stopping near us, +said, "Here, Richard, is a vacant seat. These folks can't of course +expect to monopolize two;" at the same time she commenced turning the +seat back, to the great peril of my bonnet, which, as it was made in +Boston, I confidently expected would be the envy and fashion of all +Rockland! + +I was sitting with my hand over my eyes, but at the sound of that +voice I started, and, looking up, saw before me Ada Montrose, and +with her the "dark gentleman" who had so much interested me at the +theater. Instantly throwing my veil over my face, for I had no wish +to be recognized, I watched him with a feeling akin to jealousy, +while he attended to the comfort of his companion, who demeaned +herself towards him much as she had done towards Herbert Langley. +All thoughts of sleep had left me, and throughout the entire night I +was awake, speculating upon the probable relation in which he stood +to her: and once when it suddenly occurred to me that possibly they +were married, the tears actually started to my eyes. + +As the hours sped on, he said to her a few low spoken, words, +whereupon she laid her head upon his shoulder, as if that were its +natural resting-place, while he threw his arm around her, bidding her +"sleep if she could." Of course she was his wife, I said, and with +much of bitterness at my heart, I turned away and watched the +slowly-moving lights of the canal-boats, discernible on the opposite +side of the Mohawk, along whose banks we were passing. Whether Ada +liked her pillow or not, she clung to it pertinaciously until it +seemed to me that her neck must snap asunder, while with a martyr's +patience he supported her, dozing occasionally himself, and bending +his head so low that his glossy black hair occasionally touched the +white brow of the sleeping girl. + +"Bride and groom," I heard a rough-looking man mutter, as he passed +them in quest of a seat, and as this confirmed my fears, I again +turned towards the window, which I opened, so that the night-air +might cool my burning cheeks. + +That night I made up my mind to be an "old maid." Nobody would ever +want me I knew, I was so homely; and with calm resignation I thought +how much good I would do in the world, and how I would honor the +sisterhood! Very slowly the morning light came struggling in through +the dirty windows, rousing the weary passengers, who, rubbing their +red-rimmed eyes, looked around to sea who their companions were. It +was nearly noon when we reached Canandaigua, and so carefully had I +kept my face hidden from view that Ada had no suspicion whatever of +my presence. At Canandaigua I took leave of my companion, and +stepping out upon the platform in front of the dépôt, looked +anxiously around for Herbert, but he was not there. Thinking he +would soon be there, I found my way to the public parlor, which for a +few moments I occupied alone. I had just removed my dusty bonnet, +and was brushing my tangled hair, when the door opened, and I stood +face to face with Ada Montrose, who started back, and for a moment +evidently debated the propriety of recognizing me. Thinking she +might do just as she pleased, I simply nodded, as I would to any +stranger, and went on with my toilet, while throwing herself upon the +sofa, she exclaimed, "Dear me, how tired I am! Do you live here?" + +"Of course not," I answered; "I am on my way to visit my sister Anna, +whom you perhaps remember." + +She turned very red, and replied by asking if I were in the train +which had just passed. + +"Yes," I answered; "I occupied the seat directly behind you +and----your _husband_--is it not?" + +I felt that I must know the truth, and hence the rather impertinent +question, which, however, did not seem to displease her in the least. +Affecting to be a little embarrassed, she said, "Not my husband--yet. +He came on to Boston to accompany me home, and wishing to see a +friend of his, who lives here, we have stopped over one train." + +I know not why it was, but her words gave me comfort; while at the +same time the state of single-blessedness appeared to me far less +attractive than it had a few hours before! I was on the point of +asking her about my aunt, when the door again opened and there stood +before us a slovenly-looking man, attired in a slouched hat, muddy +pantaloons, gray coat, and huge cow-hide boots. So complete was the +metamorphosis that neither of us recognized him, until he had +exclaimed, as his eye fell upon Ada, "Good Heavens, Ade! How came +you here?" + +Then we knew it was Herbert Langley! + +So astonished was I that it was some time ere I found voice to return +his rather noisy greeting. Try as he would, he could not conceal the +fact that he was rather disconcerted at being seen by Ada in such a +plight, and after a little he stammered out an apology, saying he was +a farmer now, and lived in the country, and of course could not be +expected to dress as he used in the city. This, I knew, was no +excuse, and I trembled lest he might be changed in more points than +one. + +"How is your wife, Mrs. Langley?" asked Ada, in a mocking, +deferential tone. + +Instantly the whole expression of Herbert's face was changed, and +there was a look of tenderness and pride in his eyes as he advanced +towards Ada, and whispered in her ear something which I did not +understand. Whatever it was, it made her blush, as she replied +rather sneeringly, "Of course I congratulate you." + +It has always been my misfortune to be rather stupid in some matters, +and I had not the least idea what either of them meant, or why +Herbert was to be congratulated. Possibly I might have asked an +explanation, but just then the town clock struck the hour of one, and +turning towards me, he said it was time we were on our way, for the +fall rains had made the roads almost impassable, and he was afraid we +should not reach home before dark. "So put on your things quick," he +added. "The _carriage_ is all ready." + +This last he said laughingly, for the carriage proved to be a long +lumber wagon, such as is seldom found in Massachusetts, or at least, +_I_ had never seen one like it before, and it became a serious +question in my mind as to how I was expected to enter it, there being +no possible way of doing so, save by climbing over the _wheels_ which +were reeking with mud. Herbert seemed to enjoy my embarrassment, for +he asked me if "I didn't think I could step from the ground into the +box," a distance of several feet? I was soon relieved from my +difficulty by the porter, who placed before me some wooden steps, on +which I mounted safely, and seated myself in the large armchair, +which, with its warm buffalo-robes, was really more comfortable than +the old-fashioned one-horse wagons of New England, though I did not +think so then; and when the spirited horses, at a crack from +Herbert's whip, sprang forward, while I, losing my balance, pitched +over backward, I began to cry, wishing in my heart that I was back in +Meadow Brook. + +It was a cold, raw, autumnal day. The roads, as Herbert had said, +were horrible; and as we plowed through the thick mud, which, in some +places was up to the wheel hubs, I took, I believe, my first lesson +in genuine homesickness, which, in my opinion, is about as hard to +bear as love-sickness! Indeed, I think they _feel_ much alike--the +latter being, perhaps, a very little the worse of the two! It was in +vain that Herbert pointed out to me the many handsome farmhouses +which we passed, expatiating upon the richness and fertility of the +soil, and telling me how greatly superior in everything New York was +to New England. I scarcely heard him, for even though in all +Massachusetts there was naught save the rocky hills, and sterile +plains, it was _my home_, and from that spot the heart cannot easily +be weaned. + +Rockland is a large, wealthy town, embracing within its limits more +than the prescribed rule of six miles square, while scattered through +it are two or three little villages; each bearing a distinct name, by +which they are known abroad. First, there was Laurel Hill, famed as +the residence of certain families who were styled _proud_ and +_aristocratic_--to say nothing of their being _Episcopalians_, which +last fact was by some regarded as the main cause of their +haughtiness. Next came the "Center," with its group of red houses, +and its single spire, so tall, so straight, and so square, that it +scarce needed the lettering over the entrance to tell to the stranger +that _Presbyterians_ worshiped there. Lastly came Flattville, by far +the largest village in Rockland, and the home of all the _isms_ in +the known world. To the south of Flattville is a small lake, +renowned for its quiet beauty, and the picturesque wildness of its +shores. Bounded on three sides by high hills, its waters sleep +calmly in the sunlight of summer, or dash angrily upon the sandy +beach, when moved by the chill breath of winter. + +On the brow of one of the high hills which overlook the Honeoye, and +so near to it that the sweep of the waves can be distinctly heard in +a clear, still night, stood the home of my sister. It was a huge, +wooden building, containing rooms innumerable, while even the +basement was large enough to accommodate one or more families. Being +the first frame house erected in the town, it was of course looked +upon with considerable interest, and as if to make it still more +notorious, it bore the reputation of being _haunted_, and by some of +the neighbors was called the "Haunted Castle." + +Years before, when the country was new, it was a sort of +public-house, and a young girl was said to have been murdered there, +and buried in the cellar, from whence she was afterwards removed and +thrown into the lake. For the truth of this story there was no +proof, save the fact, that in the dark cellar there was a slight +excavation, supposed to have been the grave of the ill-fated lady. +All this Herbert very kindly told me, as we rode leisurely along, +saying, when I asked if he believed it, "Believe it! No! Of course +not. To be sure, it's the squeakiest old rattle-trap of a house that +I ever saw; and were I at all superstitious, I could readily believe +it haunted. But you are not frightened; are you?" he asked, looking +in my face, which was very pale. + +I hold that there is in every human breast a dread of the +supernatural, and though I do not by any means believe in ghosts, I +would certainly prefer not to live in a house where they are supposed +to dwell. Still, I dared not tell Herbert so, and, consequently, I +only laughed at the idea of a haunted house, saying it was very +romantic. It was after sunset when we at last turned into the long +avenue, shaded on either side by forest maples, which the first +proprietor of the place had suffered to remain; and as my eyes fell +upon the large, dark building, which Herbert said was his house, I +involuntarily shuddered, for to me it seemed the very spot of all +others which goblins would choose for their nightly revels. The wind +was blowing from the west, and as I followed Herbert up to the door, +my ear caught a dull, moaning sound, which caused me to quicken my +footsteps, while I asked, in some trepidation, what it was. + +"That? Oh, that's the roar of the lake. Don't you see how near it +is to us, directly at the foot of the hill?" and he pointed out to me +the broad sheet of water, just discernible in the gathering darkness. + +A sudden gust of wind swept past me, and again I caught the low +murmur. There was something human in the tone, and though for three +years I almost daily heard that sound, I could never fully rid myself +of the impression that it was the spirit of the murdered maiden which +thus, to the swelling waves, complained of the crime long unpunished. + +"Come this way, Rose," said Herbert, as I entered the narrow "entry" +so common in old-fashioned houses; and following him, I was soon +ushered into a large square room, where a bright wood fire was +blazing, casting a somewhat cheerful aspect over the somber, +wainscoted walls of ancient make. + +In one corner of the room was a bed, and on it lay Anna, who, the +moment she saw me, uttered a cry of joy. + +"Have you told her?" she asked of Herbert, when the first pleasure of +our meeting was over. + +He replied in the negative, whereupon she brought up from under a +pile of pillows, coverlets, blankets and sheets, a little tiny, +red-faced, wrinkled thing, to which she said I was _Aunt_! I knew, +then, why Ada congratulated Herbert, and mentally chiding myself for +my stupidity, I took the bundle of cambric and flannel in my arms, +while Anna said, "We call him Jamie Lee, and we think he looks like +you. Isn't he a beauty?" + +He _did_ look like me, and knowing that, I wondered at Anna's +question; but where is the young mother who thinks her first born +baby homely?--though his nose be flat--his forehead low--and his +mouth extend from ear to ear! Not Anna, most certainly. He was +_her_ baby and Herbert's, and to her partial eyes he was beautiful, +even though he did resemble me, whom but one person had ever called +pretty. As for myself, I hardly knew whether to be pleased with my +new relative or not. Babies, particularly little tiny ones, had +never been my special delight, but on this occasion, feeling that +some demonstration was expected from me, I kissed my little nephew, +who returning my greeting with a wry face, and an outcry so loud that +Anna, in great alarm lest he was "going into a fit," summoned from +the kitchen, where she was enjoying a _quiet smoke_, Aunty Matson, +who boasted of having washed and dressed two hundred and fifty +babies, and who confidently expected to do the same service for two +hundred and fifty more ere her life's sun was set. + +Wearied with my ride, I asked permission to retire early; whereupon +Dame Matson volunteered to show me the way to my room. Up the narrow +stairs, which creaked at every step, and on through one gloomy room +after another, she led me until, at last, we came to a chamber, +lighter and more airy, which, she said, my sister had papered, +painted, and fitted up for me; adding, as she set the candle upon the +table and closed the window. "You ain't afraid of spooks nor +nothin'?" + +"_Spooks_" was to me a new word, and in some surprise I asked what +she meant. + +"Now, du tell," she replied, seating herself upon the foot of the +bed. "Now, du tell a body where you was brought up, that you don't +know what a _spook_ is! Why, it's a _sperrit_--a ghost--and this +house, they say, is full on 'em. But I don't b'lieve a word on't. +S'posin' a gal was murdered near forty years ago, 'tain't likely she +haunts the place yet, and then, too, she warn't none of the best of +girls, I guess, from what I've heard my mother say." + +The wind was blowing hard, and as Dame Matson uttered these last +words, the door, which she had left ajar, came together with a bang, +while from the lake I heard again the wailing cry, which, this time, +had in it an angry tone, as if the maiden were indignant at the wrong +done her by the old dame, whose eyes seemed to expand and grow +blacker at the sound. Overcome as I was with fatigue, I could not +sleep; and for hours I lay awake, listening to the rain as it fell +upon the roof, and to the howling wind, which, indeed, produced the +most unearthly noises I had ever heard. At last, however, nature +could no longer endure, and I fell into a deep slumber, from which I +did not awake until the sun was high up in the heavens, and +preparations were going forward in the kitchen for dinner, which was +served exactly at twelve. Greatly refreshed, I was ready to laugh at +my fears of the night previous; and with childish joy, I explored +every nook and corner of the old castle; finding many a rat-hole, +which threw some light on the sounds over my head, which I had +likened to the trampling of horses. + +It took but a few days for me to discover that Herbert was +exceedingly popular at Breeze Hill, as the neighborhood in which he +lived was called. His free, social manners had won for him many +friends, and made him almost too much of a favorite. At least, I +used to think so, during the long winter evenings, when Anna sat with +her baby upon her lap, listening for the footsteps of her husband, +who, at some neighbor's fireside, was cracking the merry joke, and +quaffing the sparkling cider; which, at Breeze Hill, was considered +essential to hospitality. Gradually, too, as the winter wore on, my +sister's eye took the anxious expression I had so often seen in my +Aunt Charlotte; and sometimes, when he stayed from her longer than +usual, she would steal down to the foot of the long Avenue, and +there, alone, would wait and listen for her husband's coming; while +the spirit from the lake would whisper sadly in her ear of the +darkness and desolation hovering near. And all this time Herbert +professed to be strictly temperate; and when, about the middle of +March, a traveling lecturer held forth in the old log schoolhouse, +thundering his anathemas against the use of all spirituous liquors, +Herbert was the most zealous of all his listeners, and at the close +of the lecture, arose himself and addressed the assembly, pouring out +such a tide of eloquence as astonished the audience, who rent the air +with shouts of "Langley forever!" + +Knowing this, I was greatly surprised, after our return home, to see +the young orator go up to the sideboard and drink off, at one +draught, a goblet of the _porter_ which had been ordered for Anna! +_She_ saw it, too, and for an instant her face was pressed against +that of her sleeping boy; and when next the lamplight fell upon it, I +saw there traces of tears, while a faint smile played around her +mouth, as she said, "I am afraid, Herbert, your audience would hardly +think your theory and practise agree, could they see you now." + +The words were ill-timed; for they awoke the young man's resentment, +and with a flushed brow he retorted angrily, that "if porter were +good for her, it was for him; he saw no difference between a drinking +woman and a drinking man; except, indeed, that the former was the +most despicable." + +The next morning, the bottles of porter were gone from the sideboard; +but out in the orchard, where the grass of an early spring was just +starting into life, they lay shattered in a hundred pieces. Would, +oh, would that she, the wife of little more than a year, could thus +easily have broken the habits of him she loved better than her life. +But it could not be; and all through the bright spring days she +drooped, and faded, and struggled hard to keep from me the fatal +truth; and when the warm breath of summer was over all the land; when +the robins' song was heard in the maple trees; and the roses +blossomed by the open door, they brought no gladness to her heart; no +love-light to her eye, save when she looked upon her baby; now a +playful, handsome child, the pet and idol of the house. + +At last, Aunt Charlotte wrote to me, asking to be assured of her +son's safety; and then poor Anna begged me not to tell that the +wine-cup was his companion at morn; his solace at noon, and his +comfort at night. Yielding to her entreaties, I answered evasively; +and thus the shock, when it came to that mother's heart, was harder +far to bear, from the perfect security she had felt. At Meadow +Brook, too, they little dreamed how their absent daughter wept and +prayed over her fallen husband, who, day after day, made rapid +strides down the road to death; for, on her bended knees, Anna +implored me to keep her shame a secret yet a little longer; and with +this request I also complied, doing whatever I could to smooth the +thorny pathway she was treading. + + + + +CHAPTER XVII. + +THE DARK MAN. + +The long summer days had merged into autumn, whose hazy breath +floated like a misty veil over the distant hills. Slowly and +noiselessly the leaves were dropping one by one from the maple trees, +strewing the withered grass with a carpet of gorgeous hue. The birds +had sung their farewell song to their summer nests, and were off for +a warmer clime; while here and there busy hands and feet were seen +gathering in the autumnal stores. + +On Herbert's farm, however, there was a look of decay. The yellow +corn and golden pumpkins were yet in the field; the apples lay in +heaps upon the ground; the gates swung loosely in the wind; while the +horses, uncared for and unfed, neighed piteously in their stalls as +if asking why they were thus neglected. Alas! their master was a +drunkard. Anna was a drunkard's wife; and mine a drunkard's home! +It was no longer a secret there, and the old men shook their heads, +while the young men sighed to think how he had fallen. Night after +night we sat up for him, my sister and I lifting him from the +threshold across which he would fall, and bearing him to his bed, +where we would lay him beside his innocent son, whose blue eyes often +opened with wonder at being thus disturbed. A night's debauch was +always followed by a day of weakness and debility, in which he was +incapable of exertion, and so everything seemed on the verge of ruin, +when he suddenly conceived the idea of advertising for an efficient +man, who would take the entire charge of affairs and relieve him from +all care. + +About this time I went back to Meadow Brook for a few weeks to be +present at the bridal of my oldest sister. Anna, too, was urged to +accompany me, but she declined, extorting from me a promise that if +it were possible I would not divulge the real state of things. "Tell +them I am happy and do not regret what I have done," said she, as she +followed me down to the gate. + +"And would that be true?" I asked, looking her in the face. + +For an instant she hesitated, while her pale cheeks flushed and the +tears started to her eyes; then glancing at little Jamie, whom she +held in her arms, she answered, "Yes, it would be true. I do not +regret it. I had rather be Herbert's wife as he is, than not to have +been his wife at all." + +Ah, who can fathom the depths of woman's love, and what punishment +shall be sufficient for him who wantonly tramples upon it. Thus I +thought as I turned away from my sister, pondering upon her words +long after I reached the cars, and wondering if I should ever love as +she did. Involuntarily the doctor rose up before me--a drunkard, and +I his wife, and from my inmost soul I answered, "rather death than +that!" Then, though I blushed as I did so, I fancied myself the wife +of "the dark man," and _he_ a drunkard. "Yes, I could bear that," I +said, and as if to make the old adage true, that a _certain +individual_ is always near when we are talking about him, the car +door opened and the subject of my meditations stood before me! There +was no mistaking him. The same tall, manly form, the piercing eyes, +the coal black hair and the same deep cut between the eyebrows. I +knew him in a moment, and an exclamation of surprise escaped my lips, +which, however, was lost by the rush of the cars. The seats were +nearly occupied, and as he passed down the aisle, my readers, I +trust, will pardon me, if I _did_ gather up the skirt of my dress and +take my traveling bag upon my lap, while I myself sat nearer to the +window, looking out in order to hide my face, which I thought +possibly might not attract him! + +"Is this seat occupied, miss?" said a heavy voice, which seemed to +come from some far-off region. + +"No, sir," I answered, timidly, without venturing to turn my head, +until I felt myself uncomfortably crowded; then I looked around, and +behold! the dark stranger was sitting behind me near the door, while +at my side was a man of mammoth dimensions, with immense mustaches, +watery eyes, and a brandy breath flavored with tobacco! + +I wanted to cry, and should probably have done so, had not my +companion immediately commenced a conversation by asking "if I had +come very far, and where I was going?" + +He was exceedingly loquacious, and for several hours plied me with +questions as to my own name--my parents--my grandparents--my +brothers--my sisters--our standing in the world--our religion--our +politics, and our opinion of spiritualism, of which last he was a +zealous advocate. At length just as it was growing dark, he gathered +up his huge proportions, and to my great joy bade me adieu, +expressing his regret at leaving me, and also assuring me that I +would one day be a medium, which assumption he based upon the fact of +my having admitted that sometimes when falling away to sleep I +started suddenly and awoke. _This_, he said, was a _spirit shock_, +and would in the end lead to great results. + +About nine o'clock we stopped for refreshments, and on reentering the +cars, I found to my joy that the dark stranger's seat was +appropriated by a son of Erin, who seemed nowise inclined to +surrender it, inasmuch as he had with him his wife, baby, and bundle. +This time the fates were propitious, for after looking around him +awhile, the stranger asked permission to sit by me, saying ha should +not discommode me more than two or three hours, as by that time he +hoped to reach his journey's end, a remark which gave me more pain +than pleasure, for every nerve thrilled with joy at being thus near +to one who, though an entire stranger, possessed for me a particular +attraction. It was quite dark where we sat, and the night lamp +burned but dimly, so he did not once obtain a full view of my face. +He proved a most agreeable and attentive companion, opening and +shutting the window just as often as I evinced an inclination to have +him, holding my satchel in his lap; placing his own traveling trunk +at my feet for a footstool, and offering me his fur-lined overcoat +for a pillow; besides expressing many fears that I would take cold +whenever the window was open. At almost every station, too, he asked +"if I wished for anything," but I did not, expect indeed to know +whether he was yet the husband of Ada Montrose, and to obtain that +information I would have given almost anything. At last I hit upon +the following expedient. He made some remark about the country +through which we were passing, and I replied by saying that "I +believed it was not the first time he had been over that road, as, if +I mistook not, I saw him in the cars with his _wife_ the year before." + +The wrinkle in his forehead grew deeper, and his face flushed as he +said quickly, "I do not remember of meeting you before, though I was +here last fall, but not with my _wife_, for I have none. It was my +_ward_, Miss Montrose." + +Nothing could have given me more satisfaction than, this +announcement, for if Ada were his _ward_, it explained, in a measure, +his attentions to her; and as I cast stolen glances at him, I felt +more and more convinced that there could be no affinity between him +and the haughty, imperious girl to whom he was guardian. It seemed +to me a very short time ere he arose, and offering me his hand, said +he must go, adding, "We shall undoubtedly meet again, as I +occasionally travel this way." + +Yes, we should meet again. I felt sure of that, though how and where +I could not tell. + +It was nearly noon of the next day when I reached Meadow Brook, where +I found my father at the dépôt, waiting to receive me. Very kindly +he greeted me, inquiring eagerly after Anna and her boy, his +grandson, whom he expressed a strong desire to see. "But I never +shall," he said sadly, as he walked slowly beside me up the long hill +which led to the village. Of Herbert he spoke not a word, though my +mother and my sisters did, asking me numberless questions, some of +which I answered, while the others I managed to evade, keeping them +ignorant of the existing state of things. + +I found them all busied with the preparations for Juliet's wedding, +which took place within a week after my return, I officiating as +bridesmaid, while the groomsman was none other than my old enemy, +JOHN THOMPSON, now a tall young man of eighteen, and cousin to +Juliet's husband. When first the plan was suggested to me I refused, +for I bore him no good will; but my objections were overruled by +Juliet, who told me how much he had improved, and that I would find +him very agreeable, which was indeed true. He was very polite and +attentive, referring laughingly to the "freaks of his _boyhood_," as +he termed them, while at the same time he laid his hand upon his +_chin_, caressing the beard which was there only in imagination, and +even apologizing to me in a kind of off-hand way for his conduct of +three years before. Of course I forgave him, and we are now the best +of friends. So much for childish prejudices. + +In the course of the evening I asked him about the doctor, and was +told that he was still in Boston, and doing remarkably well. "And do +you know," said John, "he imputes his success to _you_! I verily +believe he thinks you a perfect angel! Any way, I know he likes you +better than he does Dell, for he told me so in plain English, and I +don't blame him either; the way she cuts up is enough to kill any +man. Why, if I were in his place, I'd get a divorce from her at +once, and offer myself to you!" + +"I wouldn't have him," said I, quickly. + +"Nor me either? Wouldn't you have me?" asked John, playfully. + +"No, I wouldn't," was my reply; whereupon he laughed heartily, saying +"he was glad he knew my sentiments before he committed himself;" and +there the conversation ended. + +After Juliet had left us for her new home, in an adjoining town, +there ensued at our house a season of lonely quiet, in which we +scarcely knew whether to laugh or to cry. There is always something +sad in the giving up of a daughter to the care of another, and so my +parents found it, particularly my father, who, broken in spirit and +feeble in health, was unusually cast down. He could hardly suffer me +to leave his sight for a moment, and still he seemed to take special +pleasure in finding fault with whatever I did. Nothing pleased him, +and gradually there returned upon me with its full force the olden +fancy of my childhood, that _I_ was not loved like the rest. It was +a most bitter thought, wringing my heart with a keener anguish than +it had ever done before; and once, the very day before the one set +for my return to Rockland, my pent up feelings burst forth, and in +angry tones I told him "it was useless for me to try to please +him--he didn't love me and never had--and I was glad that the morrow +would find me away, where he would no longer be troubled with my +presence, which was evidently so disagreeable to him." + +He made me no answer, but a fearful look of sorrow, which will haunt +me to my dying day, passed over his thin, white face, and his hand, +which was hard and brown with toil for me, was raised beseechingly as +if to stay the angry torrent. Oh, how I repented of my harshness +then, but I did not tell him so; I would wait till morning, and then, +ere I left, I would seek the forgiveness, without which I well knew I +should be wretched, for something told me that never in this world +should wo meet again. + +Next, morning when I awoke, the sun was shining brightly in at my +window, and hurrying on my clothes, I descended to the dining-room. +In silence we gathered around the breakfast table, and then I saw +that my father was absent. "Where was he?" I asked, and was told +that having business in Southbridge, a town several miles distant, he +had left early, telling my mother to bid me good-by for him. All my +good resolutions were forgotten, and again I said hastily, "I think +he might at least have bidden me good-by himself, and you may tell +him so." + +"Hush, Rose, hush," said my mother. "Your father isn't the man he +was before we left our old home. He is broken down, and it may be +you have seen him for the last time." + +"It is hardly probable," I answered, and with a swelling heart I bade +my mother adieu; but I left no message which would tell my father how +much I repented of my rashness. + +Upon his grave the tall grass is growing--howling storms have swept +across it--wintry snows have been piled upon it--the summer's mellow +sunlight has fallen around it--flowers have blossomed and +faded--changes have come to us all--and still I have never ceased to +regret that last interview with my father, or to mourn over my +distrust of his love for me. + + + + +CHAPTER XVIII. + +THE DEATH OF THE DRUNKARD. + +During my journey back to Rockland, I did not again meet with the +stranger, although I looked for him at every station, and when at +last I stepped from the cars at Canandaigua, I must confess to a +feeling of disappointment. I had expected Herbert to meet me, but he +was not there. I was just wondering what I should do in case he +failed to come, when my attention was attracted towards a tall, +athletic-looking young man, who was inspecting my trunk, which stood +upon the platform. Fearful lest my best clothes should be carried +off before my very face, I started quickly forward, demanding what he +was doing with my baggage. + +The stranger stood up, and fixed upon me a pair of singularly +handsome, hazel eyes, which had in them an expression so penetrating +that I quailed beneath them; while at the same time there swept over +me a strange, undefined feeling as if somewhere in a dream, +perchance, I had met that glance before. + +"Are you Miss Lee?" he asked, and the tones of his voice thrilled me +like an echo of the past. + +I replied in the affirmative; and without once taking his eyes from +my face, he said, "I am Henry Watson, Mr. Langley's hired man. He +sent me for you, and the wagon is at the other door." + +Mechanically I followed him to the place designated, and then, as if +I had been a feather, he took me in his arms and placed me in the +wide chair, wrapping the buffalo-robes around me, and in various ways +seeing that I was comfortable. He did not seem to me like a +hireling, for his language was good, his manner gentlemanly, and ere +we were half-way to Breeze Hill I was very much prepossessed in his +favor, except, indeed, that he would look at me so much. He was +quite talkative, asking me of my parents, of my brothers, and +appearing much gratified when I told him how well Charlie was doing +as clerk in a dry goods store in Worcester. + +"And Mr. Langley is only your cousin by marriage?" he said at last. +"Have you any other male cousins?" he asked. + +"I had a boy cousin once," I said, "but he is probably dead, for we +have not heard from him in six long years." + +Forgetful that Mr. Watson was to me an entire stranger, I very +briefly told him the story of "Cousin Will," who returned not with +the vessel which bore him away, and who had deserted the ship at +Calcutta. For many days they searched for him in vain, and at last +left him alone in that far-off land, where he had probably met an +early death. + +"He must have been a wild boy, and I dare say you felt relieved to be +rid of him," said Mr. Watson, who had appeared deeply interested in +my story. + +"Yes, he was wild," I replied, "but I liked him very, very much, and +cried myself sick when he went away." + +Again the stranger's eyes fell upon me with a look I could not +fathom. I grew uneasy, and was not sorry when about sunset we turned +into the long, shady avenue which led up to the house. As if by +magic, a wondrous change had been wrought in my absence; for +everything around the building wore an air of neatness and thrift, +which betokened that there was now a head to manage and direct. +Herbert, too, was perfectly sober, while Anna's face was far happier +than when I last saw her. The cause of this she explained to me the +first moment we were alone. Herbert had signed the pledge! Had +become a sober man, and all through the exertions of Mr. Watson, whom +she pronounced an angel in disguise. And, truly, his influence over +Herbert was wonderful; for never did an anxious mother watch over her +sickly child more carefully than Mr. Watson watched over his +employer, shielding him from temptation, and gently leading him in +the path of rectitude; until the wine-flush on his cheek gave way to +a hue of health; the redness of his eyes was gone, and conscious of +the victory he had achieved, he stood forth again in all the pride of +his manhood, sober, virtuous, and happy. + +Such was the state of things when, early in April, we received +invitations to attend a wedding party at the house of Judge Perkins, +whose broad acres and heavy purse of gold had purchased for him a +fair young girl, just his eldest daughter's age! It was to be a +splendid affair, for all the _élite_ of Rockland were bidden, and, as +a matter of course, _I_ forthwith commenced looking over my wardrobe, +and declaring I had nothing to wear! Anna, on the contrary, did not +seem at all interested, and when I questioned her for her +indifference, she replied, "What if they have _wine_, and Herbert +should drink?" + +"They wouldn't have wine," I told her, for Judge Perkins was a +staunch temperance man, and it was not probable that he would do +anything so inconsistent with his profession. + +After a time she became convinced that her fears were groundless, and +began with me to anticipate the expected pleasure. Henry Watson was +not invited, but he carried us to the door, going himself to the +hotel to wait until we were ready to return. Just as he was leaving +us he whispered a few words to Herbert, who replied, gaily, "Never +fear for me. Judge Perkins isn't the man to throw temptation in my +way." + +Ah, would it had been so! Would that the sparkling champagne, the +ruby wine, and the foaming ale had not graced that marriage feast, +for then, perchance, one grave at least would not have been made so +soon, nor the widow's weeds worn by my sister ere the bloom of youth +had faded from her brow. + +I saw her cheek pale as we entered the supper-room, but when amid the +din and uproar which succeeded the drawing of the corks, Herbert +stood firm to his pledge, refusing to drink, though urged to do so, +the color came back to her face, and her eye proudly followed her +husband, whose easy manners made him a favorite, and who, with ready +tact, moved among the guests, doing far more towards their +entertainment than the master of the house himself. He was standing +near the bride, a beautiful young creature, with a sunny face and +radiant smile. Diamonds were wreathed in her shining curls, and +shone upon her snowy arms, while the costly veil almost swept the +floor, and enveloped her slight form like a misty cloud. Very +affable and polite had she been to Herbert, and now as he approached +her, she took from the table two goblets of wine, and passing one to +him, said, "Mr. Langley, I am sure, will not refuse to drink with me, +the bride?" + +To refuse would have seemed uncourteous; and so, with a hasty glance +at his wife, he drank the health of the lovely woman, who, in an +angel's guise, unconsciously tempted him to ruin. Involuntarily, +Anna gasped as if for breath, while she started quickly forward to +stay the rash act; but she was too late, and with a faint moan of +anguish, she turned away to hide her tears. One taste awoke the +slumbering demon, and set his veins on fire; and when at midnight Mr. +Watson came for us, he took the insensible man in his arms and placed +him in the wagon, beside the weeping wife, whose fond hopes were now +wrecked forever. + +From that time Herbert made no further attempt at reform, but night +after night, came reeling home, sometimes singing a bacchanalian +song, and again rending the air with curses, until at last poor Anna +learned to tremble at the sound of his footsteps; for he daily grew +more and more violent and unmanageable, defying every one save Mr. +Watson, who possessed over him a singular power. Thus the spring and +summer passed away, and when the autumn came few would have +recognized the once handsome Herbert Langley in the bloated creature, +who, weak and feeble, lay all day long in bed, begging for +"brandy--more brandy" to fan the flame which was feeding upon his +vitals. Sometimes in his fits of frenzy he would spring upon the +floor, and shriek for us to save him from the crawling serpents, +which, with forked tongues and little green eyes, hissed at him from +all parts of the room. Again he would say that the spirit of the +murdered maiden was before him, whispering to him unutterable things +concerning the drunkard's home beyond the grave, while goblins of +every conceivable form beckoned him to come and join their hideous +dance. + +Once, when he was more quiet than usual, he said to me, "Rose, do you +remember what I once told you about my mother's joining the church +and reading her prayers?" + +I replied in the affirmative, and he continued--"Do you know I'd give +the world, were it mine, if I could hear her pray for me once more. +It would cool my scorching brain, and if I dared pray for myself, I +know I should be healed; but I cannot, for the moment I attempt it, +there are legions of imps who flit and grin before my face, while +one, larger and more unseemly than the rest, shouts in my ears, +'LOST, LOST, TO ALL ETERNITY!' there--look, don't you hear it?" and +shivering with fright, he covered his head with the bedclothes. + +But I heard nothing save the heaving swell of the waves, and the +sullen roar of the lake, which came in through the open window, +seeming to his disordered imagination an accusing spirit from another +world. At last looking up timidly and speaking low, as if fearful of +being over, heard, he said, "Is there a Prayer Book in the house?" + +I answered in the affirmative. Raising himself upon his elbow, and +glancing fearfully around, he continued, "Bring it quick, while they +are away, and put it under my pillow. Who knows but it may operate +like a spell!" + +I complied with his request, and brought the book, which he placed +under his head, saying, "There--now I can pray, and God won't let +them mock me, will he, think?" + +I could only weep as he folded his long white hands one over the +other, and said reverently the prayer taught him years and years +before, commencing with-- + + "Now I lay me down to sleep," etc. + + +As if the words, indeed, had a soothing power, he almost instantly +fell into a deep sleep, from which he awoke refreshed, and better +than he had been for several days. They said he could not live; and +though it was a painful task, Anna wrote to his mother apprising her +of his danger, and bidding her hasten, if she would see him again. + +During the few remaining weeks of his life he was subject to strange +fancies. For a time the Prayer Book beneath his pillow had the +effect of keeping him comparatively quiet; but, anon, it lost its +power, and one day he awoke with a fearful shriek. The imps, as he +called them, had again returned, and were mockingly taunting him with +the victory he vainly imagined he had obtained. + +"Keep off, ye devils!" he shouted, drawing the volume from beneath +his pillow, and holding it to view. "Keep off; for, see, this book +is full of prayers, which my mother has said. _My mother_! Do you +hear? Ha! They laugh at the idea, and well they may. Had she +learned to pray sooner, I might not have been the vile thing that I +am. But _she_ taught me to _drink_. She set the example; so go to +_her_ with those horrid faces, besmeared with the smoke of the pit." + +There was a bitter groan, and then the wretched woman, his mother, +fell half fainting upon a chair. She had just arrived, and eager to +see her boy, had entered the room in time to hear what he said. He +knew her in a moment, and starting upright in bed, exclaimed, "Woman, +look--this is your work--the result of your example. There _was_ a +time, long ago--how long ago it seems--but there was a time, I say, +when I loathed the very smell of the liquors, which daily graced our +table. By little and by little that loathing was overcome. _You_ +drank and called it good; and what one's mother says is true. So I, +too, tasted and tasted again until here I am, Herbert Langley, +husband of Anna Lee, ruined body and soul--body and soul! What do +you say to that, mother?" + +He sank back upon the bed exhausted; while Aunt Charlotte, who had +swooned entirely away, was taken from the room. The shock was too +great for her, and for two days she did not again venture into his +presence. The next time, however, that she saw him, his mood had +changed, and winding his feeble arms around her neck, he wept like a +child, asking her to take from his heart the worm which was gnawing +there. Oh, how I pitied the heart-broken woman! for I well knew she +would gladly have lain down her life could that have saved her son. +For three days longer he lingered, and then there came the closing +scene, which haunted me for months. + +He had been restless during the night, muttering incoherently, and +occasionally striking at the fancied shapes which surrounded him; but +towards morning he grew more violent, and at last with a shriek which +chilled my blood, he sprang from the bed, and pointing towards the +window, whispered, "Hark! Don't you hear it?--_music from the +infernal regions_! They are come, every demon of them, for me. It's +a grand turnout. There! Don't you see them with their flaming eyes +looking through the windows, and that shriveled hag, whose hair is +curling snakes! See! She beckons me with her bony claws, and says I +am to be _her_ son. Do you hear that, mother? _Her son_! Go back!" +he shouted, leaping towards the window. "You don't get me this time. +I won't die yet. Give me the Prayer Book, and let me hurl it at her +head--that'll settle her, I reckon." + +He would have gone through the window, had not Mr. Watson taken him +in his arms and borne him back to the bed, where he held him fast, +soothing him as best he could by assuring him there were no such +unearthly objects in the room as he supposed. + +"I know it," said Herbert, for a moment comparatively rational. "I +know what it is. It is DELIRIUM TREMENS, and I know what causes it, +too; shall I tell you?" + +Mr. Watson nodded, and Herbert continued: "_Cider, beer, wine, +brandy_--DEATH: that's the program which keeps the fire of hell +eternally burning. Where is my boy--Anna's boy and mine?" he asked +after a pause. + +"Do you wish to see him?" asked Mr. Watson. + +"See him? Yes. I want to do one good deed before I die. _I would +kill him_--murder my only child, and send him to Heaven, where +rumsellers never go--where women, with witching eyes and luring +words, never tempt men to drink. Bring him in: why do you loiter?" +turning to Anna. "Is it that you would have him live to be the wreck +I am--to curse the mother who bore him and the day he was born! +Bring him quick, I tell you, for time hastens, and in the distance I +hear the clank of the hag's footsteps." + +"Oh, Herbert, Herbert, my poor husband," was all Anna could say, as +she wound her arms around his neck and laid her colorless cheek +against his fevered brow. + +In a moment he grew calm, and drawing her to his bosom, his tears +fell like rain upon her face, while he called her his "wounded dove," +and asked her forgiveness for all he had made her suffer. "You will +live with mother when I am gone," he said. "You and Jamie. God +forbid that I should harm our beautiful boy; but I would see him once +more. Don't be afraid," he added, as he saw her hesitate. "I will +not hurt him." + +Disengaging herself from her husband's embrace, Anna glided from the +room, to which she soon returned, leading little Jamie, now two years +of age. Very lovingly the dying man looked upon his son, and then +laying Lis shaking hand upon the golden curls, he said, "God keep +you, my boy, from being what I am; and if a drunkard's blessing can +be of any avail, you have mine, my precious, precious child." + +"Would you like to kiss him?" asked Aunt Charlotte; to which he +replied, "No, no; I am too polluted to touch aught so pure. But take +him away," he continued, growing excited. "Take him away, for the +demon on my pillow is again whispering of murder." + +Hastily the wondering child was taken from the room, and then Herbert +fell into a disturbed slumber, in which he seemed to be holding +converse with beings of another world, inquiring of them if they had +enough to drink, and chiding the rich man for asking _water_, when he +might as well call for _brandy_! + +About noon he awoke and inquired for me. With some trepidation I +approached him, for his eyes were those of a madman; but he meditated +no harm, and only asked if I supposed that the Prayer Book laid upon +the outside of his pillow, where the hag could see it, would have the +effect of keeping her away. + +"Perhaps so," I said, at the same time placing it so that his heavy +brown hair fell partially on it. + +"Now, will some one pray--mother, you?" and his eyes turned +imploringly towards the half crazed woman, who essayed to pray for +the departing spirit. + +"That'll do--that'll do," he exclaimed, interrupting her. "It's of +no use spending your breath for me. It's too late--too late--so the +hag says, and she's coming again, with myriads on myriads of fiends; +but they can't hurt me as long as this is here," and his hand +clutched convulsively for the book which lay beside him. + +"The hymn book--the hymn book--bring that too," he gasped, while a +cold perspiration stood thickly upon his forehead. + +It was brought and placed on the opposite side of his head. + +"'Twon't do--'twon't do," he sobbed. "All the hymns Dr. Watts ever +wrote can't help me, for they come nearer and nearer, as wolves hover +round their prey. Is there no help, no escape?" he cried, with the +energy of despair; adding, as a sudden look of joy lit up his ghastly +features, "Yes--the BIBLE! Strange I have not thought of that +before. The Bible will keep them at bay. Bring it, Anna, quick, for +they are almost here." + +She obeyed; and grasping the word of God eagerly in his hands, he +laughed aloud, saying, "Now, do your worst, ye fiends incarnate. The +Bible will save me." + +There was a moment of perfect silence; and then, with a groan so full +of anguish that I involuntarily stopped my ears to shut out the +fearful sound, the Bible was loosed from the clammy hands, which for +a brief instant fought fiercely in the empty air, and then dropped +lifeless at his side. + + HERBERT WAS DEAD! + +* * * * * * + +At the foot of the garden, near the long avenue where the shadow of +the maple trees would fall upon his grave, and the moan of the lake +be always heard, we buried him; and then, the broken-hearted Anna, +widowed thus early, went back to her accustomed duties, performing +each one quietly, and gently, but without a smile upon her white, +stony face, or a tear in her large mournful blue eyes. Aunt +Charlotte, too, utterly crushed and wretched, went back to her city +home, having first won a promise from Anna that in the autumn she +would follow her. And then we were left alone with our great sorrow, +wholly dependent, as it were, upon Mr. Watson, for support and +counsel. + +There had always been about him a mystery I could not fathom, and +greatly was I surprised when one evening, a week after Herbert's +death, he asked me to go with him to his room, as there was something +he wished to tell me. I complied with his request, and was soon +seated in the large willow chair near the table on which lay many +works of our best authors, for he possessed a taste for literature, +and devoted all his leisure moments to study. Drawing a seat to my +side, he said, taking my hand in his, "Rosa, what do you think I am +going to tell you?" + +I tried to wrest my hand from his grasp, for the unwonted liberty +angered me. But he held it fast, smiling at my fruitless endeavors, +and after a moment continued: "Why do you try to remove your hand +from mine? I have held it many a time, and I have a right so to +do--a cousin's right. Look at me, Rosa, don't you know me?" + +Involuntarily I started to my feet, gazing earnestly upon him, then +with a cry of joy I threw my arms around his neck, exclaiming, +"_Cousin Will! Cousin Will!_" + +It was indeed he, come back to us when we had thought of him as dead. +A few words will suffice to tell his story. Perfectly disgusted with +sea life, he had deserted at Calcutta, where he kept himself secreted +until the vessel sailed. But it was not his wish to remain there +long, and the first time an English ship was in port he offered to +work his passage to Liverpool. The offer was accepted, and while we +were mourning over his supposed death he was threading the smoky +streets of London, doing sometimes one thing and sometimes another, +but always earning an honest livelihood. + +"Never, for a moment," said he, "did I forget your family, but I have +fancied they were glad to be rid of me, and hence my silence. When +at last I returned again to New York, I went one day to a +reading-room, where I accidentally came across Mr. Langley's +advertisement, and something prompted me to answer it in person. If +I had ever heard of him before, I had forgotten it; consequently I +neither recognized him nor his wife, who has changed much since I saw +her; but when I accidentally heard them speak of 'Rosa,' and 'Meadow +Brook,' my curiosity was roused, and I became aware of the +relationship existing between us. Why I have kept it a secret so +long I can hardly tell, except that there was about it, to me, a kind +of pleasing excitement, and then, too, I fancied that Mr. Langley +would not so well hear restraint and direction from me if he supposed +me an interested party; but he has gone, and concealment on that +score is no longer necessary. I have told you my story, Rosa, and +now it is for you to say whether I am again received and loved as the +'Cousin Will' of olden time." + +He was a big, tall man, six feet two inches high, while I was a young +girl scarcely yet seventeen; but notwithstanding all this, I threw my +arms around his sunburnt neck and kissed his sunburnt cheek as I had +often done before. This was my answer, and with it he was satisfied. + +After leaving his room I went directly to my sister, to whom I +repeated the strange story I had heard. She was pleased and +gratified, but her faculties were too much benumbed for her to +manifest any particular emotion, though as time wore on I could see +how much she leaned upon him and confided in his judgment. It seemed +necessary for her to remain in Rockland through the summer, and as +she would not consent to my leaving her, I was rather compelled to +stay; although almost weekly there came to us letters from home +urging our return, and at last, near the middle of September, we one +day received a letter from Charlie, which, owing to some delay, had +been on the road two whole weeks. In it he wrote that our father had +failed rapidly within a few days and we must come quickly if we would +again see him alive, adding that he talked almost constantly of Rose, +asking if they thought she would come. + +Oh, how vividly I recalled the past, remembering with anguish the +harsh words I had uttered when last I saw him. It was true I had +once written, imploring pardon for my fault, and Lizzie, who answered +my letter, had said, "Father bade me say that you were freely +forgiven;" but still I felt that I could not let him die until I had +heard my forgiveness from his own lips. It was impossible for Anna +to accompany me, and, as William would not leave her, I started +alone, my heart filled with many dark forebodings, lest I should be +too late. + + + + +CHAPTER XIX. + +THE DEATH OF THE RIGHTEOUS. + +All around the house was still; while within, the children and the +neighbors trod softly as they went from room to room, and their faces +wore an anxious, troubled look, as if they already felt the presence +of the shadow hovering near. The heavy brass knocker was muffled, +and the deep-toned churchbell across the way no longer told the hours +of 12 and 9, for at each stroke the sick man had turned upon his +pillow, and moaned as if in pain. So when the Sabbath came the +people went up unsummoned to the house of God, where they reverently +prayed for him, who was passing from their midst, and who, ere +another week rolled round, would be "where congregations ne'er break +up, and Sabbaths never end." + +For many days he had lain in a kind of stupor from which nothing +roused him save the rush of the engine as it swept across the meadow +at the foot of the hill. Then he would start up, asking eagerly if +"they had come, Anna, Rose, and Jamie." Much he talked of the absent +ones, and as day by day went by and still they came not, he wept like +a little child, as he said to his wife, "I shall never see them more." + +"And if you do not," she asked, "what shall I tell them?" + +For a time he lay as if her question was unheard--then opening his +eyes he answered, "Tell Anna, my stricken one, that there is for her +a balm in Gilead; that whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and though +the waters through which she is passing be deep and troubled, they +shall not overflow, for the everlasting arms are beneath her." + +"And Rosa, have you no message for her?" asked my mother as he ceased +speaking. + +"Oh, Rosa, Rosa," he answered quickly. "Tell her--tell her +everything--but not here--not in this room. She thinks I do not love +her, and when she comes and finds me gone, go with her to my grave. +She will believe you if you tell her there how dear she was to me, +and how, through the long weary nights before I died, I wept and +prayed for her that she might one day meet me in the better land. I +never meant to love one child more than another, but if I did--tell +her she was my pride, the one on whom I doted. She thought me cold +and unfeeling, because I stayed not to bid her adieu that morning. +Ah, she did not know that with the first dawn of day I stole up to +her chamber to look on her once more for the last, last time. There +were tears on her cheek, I kissed them away; tell her that, and +perchance her heart will soften towards her poor old father." + +From that time he sank rapidly, and one bright September day, near +the hour of sunset, it was told in Meadow Brook that he was dying. +On such occasions, in a small country village, the liveliest sympathy +is felt; and now those who knew and loved him spoke to each other +softly and low, while even the little children ceased their noisy +play upon the common, and with a timid, curious glance towards the +open windows of the sick room, hastened home, where they kept closely +at their mother's side, wondering--asking of her what death was, and +if she were sure that he, the dying one, would go to Heaven. + +Meantime, the sun was almost set, and as its last golden rays fell +upon the face of the sufferer, a radiant smile lit up his features, +and he exclaimed aloud, "'Tis the glorious light of the Eternal +shining down upon me. Do not weep, mother. We shall not be parted +long," he continued, as he felt upon his forehead a tear from the +gray-haired, wrinkled woman, on whose bosom his head was pillowed, +just as it had been, long, long ago, when first a tender babe, he lay +in that mother's arms. To her it seemed not long, and yet it was +fifty years since he was lent to her, and now, when God would have +his own again, she said submissively, "Thy will be done." Once +before had a great sorrow fallen upon her, leaving her henceforth to +walk alone, and then her soul had well-nigh fainted beneath the blow, +for she was younger far by many years. But now she was old, and +already she heard the roar of the deep, dark river on whose very +banks she stood, and down whose swift current her first-born was +floating; so she stifled her own grief, for, as he had said, she knew +it would not be long ere they met again. + +"Where is Fanny?" he asked, and his arms closed fondly around his +wife. + +It mattered not that time and care had dimmed the luster of her eye, +and robbed her cheek of its girlish bloom; to him she was beautiful +still, for through weal and woe she had been faithful to her marriage +vow, and now the bitterest pang of all was the leaving _her_ alone. + +"The God of the widow and the fatherless watch over and keep you all +so that at the last, when I ask for my children, there shall not one +be missing," he said, as his arms unclosed, and then, with a low, +wailing moan, the _mother_ bent over the white face of her son, so +that the _wife_ might not see the fearful change which had come upon +it, for _my father was dead_! + +You who have kept with me while I described the death scene of the +unfortunate Herbert, and of my sainted father, can you not--do you +not say, "Let me die the death of the righteous, and let my last end +be like his?" + +Lonely and desolate was the home at which I arrived one day too late, +for they had buried him, and there was naught left to me of my father +save the lock of hair which they severed from his head as he lay in +the coffin. Yes, he was gone; but so long as life and being endure, +so long shall fond remembrances of him linger in my memory, and if at +the last I meet him in the better world, will it not be in a measure +the blessed influence of his dying message, which has led the +wanderer there? + + + + +CHAPTER XX. + +GOING SOUTH. + +After the first shock of our sorrow was over, the question arose as +to what we were to do in future for our support. Grandma was already +old, while mother was not so young as she had been once, and neither +could do much towards their own maintenance, which necessarily would +devolve upon us their children. It had ever been a pet project of +mine to go South as a teacher, and when one day in looking over a +Boston paper I accidentally came across the advertisement of a +Georgia lady, Mrs. A. D. Lansing, who wished for a private governess, +I resolved at once to apply for the situation, greatly fearing lest I +might be too late. + +I was not, however; for after waiting impatiently for a few weeks, I +received a letter from the lady herself, who, after enumerating the +duties I was expected to perform and the branches I was to teach, +added, in a P.S.: "Before making any definite arrangements with Miss +Lee, Mrs. Lansing wishes to be informed if, either by her _friends_ +or _herself_, she is considered pretty, as a person of decidedly +ordinary looks will be preferred." + +"Spiteful, jealous old thing!" exclaimed Lizzie, who was looking over +my shoulder, "I wouldn't stir a step." + +But I thought differently. My curiosity was roused to know the cause +of her strange freak; and then, too, six hundred dollars per year +would amply atone for any little peculiarities in my employer. So I +answered her letter forthwith, assuring her that neither my friends +nor myself had ever been guilty of calling me pretty--in short, I was +decidedly homely, and trusted that on that point at least I should +please her. + +"What a fib, Rosa," said Charlie, when I told him what I had written. +"You know you are not homely. You used to be, I'll admit; but you +are far from being so now. To be sure, you are not what many would +call handsome, but you are decidedly good-looking. You've got +handsome eyes, splendid hair (and he pulled one of my short, thick +curls by way of adding emphasis to his words) and your complexion is +not one-half so sallow and muddy as it used to be. Depend upon it, +this 'Mrs. Angeline Delafield Lansing, of Cedar Grove' will think you +have deceived her." + +"Nonsense!" I replied, seating myself at the piano, which was now my +constant companion, Mrs. Lansing having written that she was very +particular about music. + +Now, to tell the truth, I was not very much of a performer, but +looking upon the South very much as I did upon the far West, I +fancied that a small amount of showy accomplishments would pass for +the real coin. Still I determined to play as well as possible, and +so week after week I practised, until, when I had nearly given up all +hopes of ever hearing from the lady again, I one day received a +letter bearing the W---- postmark, and containing a check on a Boston +bank for money sufficient to defray my expenses. There were also a +few hastily written lines, saying that "Mrs. Lansing considered our +engagement as settled, but she should not expect me until the latter +part of April, as she could not immediately get rid of her present +governess, a _painted, insipid_ creature from _New York_, and the +veriest humbug in the world." + +"A sweet time you'll have of it with madam," said Charlie, "and once +for all I advise you to give up going. Why, only think, April there +is hotter than pepper, and of course you'll take the fever and die." + +But I was not to be persuaded. The "sunny South" had for me a +peculiar fascination; and then, too, there was another reason which, +more than all others, prompted me to go. Georgia was the home of the +_dark man_, as I called him, and though there was hardly a +probability of my ever meeting him there, such a thing was still +possible, and like Longfellow's Evangeline, who, on the broad +Mississippi felt that each dip of the oar carried her nearer to her +lost Gabriel, so each day I felt a stronger and stronger conviction +that somewhere in the southern land I should find him. + +In the meantime, Anna had been with us for a few weeks, but greatly +changed from the Anna of former times. Listlessly she moved from +room to room--never smiling, never weeping, and seldom speaking +unless she were first addressed. To her, everything was dark, deep +night, and such a gloom did her presence cast over us all, that +though we would gladly have kept her with us, we still felt relieved +when she left us for a home in Boston, where little Jamie soon became +the idol of his grandmother, whose subdued cheerfulness had ere long +a visible effect upon Anna. Cousin Will, too, had visited us, and +after spending a short time had sailed with brother John for +California, promising himself a joyous future, when he should return +with money sufficient to purchase the old homestead, which he said +should be mother's as long as she lived. + +It was a cold, dark, snowy morning in the latter part of April, when +I at last started on my journey. The surface of the ground was +frozen hard, the trees were leafless and bare, while but few green +things gave token that spring was with us. It is not strange, then, +that I almost fancied myself in another world, when after a +prosperous sea voyage I one morning went on shore at Charleston, and +first breathed the soft, balmy air of the South. Dense and green was +the foliage of the trees, while thousands of roses and flowering +shrubs filled the air with a perfume almost sickening to the senses. +From Charleston to Augusta was a wearisome ride, for the cars were +crowded and dirty, and there was to me nothing remarkably pleasing in +the long stretches of cypress swamps and pine barrens though which we +passed. + +It was late in the evening when we reached the town of C----, from +whence I was to proceed to W----, by stage. It was a most beautiful +night; and for hours I watched the soft moonlight as it glimmered +among the trees which lined either side of the narrow road, and whose +branches often swept against the windows of our lumbering vehicle. +It was long after sunrise when we arrived at W----, but so thickly +wooded is the country around, that I obtained not a single glimpse of +the town until I suddenly found myself "thar," as the driver said, +dismounting and opening the door of our prison-house. The hotel into +which I was ushered, would, perhaps, compare favorably with our +country taverns at the North; but at each step I took, I felt a more +and more painful consciousness that home, my home, was far away. + +After shaking the dust from my traveling-dress, and slaking my thirst +from the big gourd shell (my special delight), which hung by the side +of a bucket of cool water which stood on a little stand in the +parlor, I inquired for some one who would take to Mrs. Lansing my +card, and thus apprise her of my arrival. The landlord immediately +summoned a bright, handsome mulatto boy, who, after receiving my +orders, and favoring me with a sight of his ivories, started off +bareheaded, and for that matter bare-bodied too, for Cedar Grove, +which the landlord pointed out to me in the distance, and which, with +its dense surrounding of trees, looked to me delightfully cool and +pleasant. After waiting rather impatiently for an hour or more, a +large, old-fashioned carriage, drawn by two rather poor-looking +horses, stopped before the door. It belonged to Mrs. Lansing; and +the footman, jumping down from the rack behind, handed me a note; in +which the lady begged me to come directly to her house, saying she +was herself indisposed, or she would have come down to meet me, and +also adding, that if I would excuse her she would rather not see me +until supper-time, when she hoped to feel better. + +At the extremity of Main Street, we turned in at a ponderous gate, +and after passing through two or three fields or lawns, stopped at +last in front of Cedar Grove, which stood upon a slight eminence +overlooking the town. In perfect delight I gazed around me, for it +seemed the embodiment of my childish dreams, and involuntarily I +exclaimed, "This is indeed the sunny, sunny South." It was very +beautiful, that spacious yard and garden, with their winding walks on +which no ray of sunlight fell, so securely were they shaded, by the +cedar and the fir, the catalpa, the magnolia, and the fig tree, most +of them seen now by me for the first time in all their natural +beauty, reminded one so forcibly of Eden. The house itself was a +large, square building, surrounded on three sides by a piazza, which +I afterwards found was the family sitting-room; it being there that +they congregated both morning and evening. The building had once +been white, but the paint was nearly all worn off, and it now +presented a rather dilapidated appearance, with its broken shutters +and decayed pillars, round which vines and ivy were twining. The +floors within were bare, but scrupulously clean; while the rooms +lacked the costly furniture I had confidently expected to see. + +Scarcely was I seated in the parlor, when I heard a sweet, childish +voice exclaim, "She's in _thar_--she is," while at the same time a +pair of soft, blue eyes looked through the crevice of the door, and +then were quickly withdrawn, their owner laughing aloud as if she had +accomplished some daring feat, and calling out, "I seen her, Hal--I +did. And she don't look cross neither. You dassn't peek in thar, +dast you?" + +They were my future pupils, I was sure; and already my heart warmed +towards them, particularly her with the silvery voice, and I was just +thinking of going out to find them, when I heard a light footstep on +the stairs, and the next moment a tall, dark-eyed girl, apparently +fourteen or fifteen years of age, entered the room, introducing +herself as Miss Lina Lansing, and welcoming me so cordially that I +felt myself at once at home. + +"Mother," said she, "is indisposed, as I believe she wrote you, and +has sent me to receive you, and ask what you would like." + +I had scarcely slept a moment the night previous, so I replied, that +if convenient, I would go immediately to my room. Ringing the bell, +she summoned to the room a short, dumpy mulatto, whom she called +Cressy, and who, she said, was to be my attendant. Following her up +the stairs, I was ushered into a large, airy chamber, which, though +not furnished with elegance, still contained everything for my +comfort, even to a huge _feather-bed_, the sight of which made me +wipe the perspiration from my face. + +"Shall I wash missus' feet first, or comb her har?" asked the +negress, pouring a pitcher of water into a small bathing tub. + +This was entirely new to me, who had always been accustomed to wait +upon myself, so I declined her offers of assistance, telling her, "I +preferred being alone, and could do everything for myself which was +necessary." + +"Laws, missus!" she answered, rolling the whites of her eyes, "'taint +no ways likely you can bresh and 'range all dat ar har," pointing to +my thick and now somewhat tangled curls. "Why, Miss Lina's +straighter dan a string, an' I'll be boun' she never yet tache a comb +to it herself." + +With some difficulty I convinced the African that her services were +not needed, and staring at me as if I had been a kind of monstrosity, +she left the room, the door of which I bolted against any new +intruder. The windows of my chamber looked out upon the garden, +where now were blossoming roses and flowers of every possible hue and +form. A little to the right, and about a quarter of a mile away was +another building, larger and more imposing that than of Mrs. Lansing, +while a great deal of taste seemed to be displayed in the arrangement +of the grounds. As nearly as I could judge, it stood upon a little +hill, for the trees appeared to rise regularly one above the other, +the fir and the cedar forming the outer boundary; while, as I +afterwards learned, the inner rows consisted of the graceful +magnolia, the wide-spreading catalpa, the beautiful china tree, and +the persimmon, whose leaves in the autumn wear a most brilliant hue, +and present so fine a contrast to the dark green of the pine and the +fir. Very, very pleasant it looked to me, with its white walls just +discernible amid the dense foliage which surrounded it, and for a +long time I stood gazing towards it wondering whose home it was, and +if the inmates were as happy as it seemed they might be. + +At last, faint with the fatigue of my journey and the odor of the +flowers, which, from the garden below, came in at the open window, I +threw myself upon the lounge (feather bed looking altogether too +formidable) and was soon fast asleep, dreaming of Meadow Brook, of +the white house on the hill, and of the _dark man_, who, I thought, +told me that it should one day be my home. When at last I awoke, the +sun was no longer shining in at my window for it was late in the +afternoon, and the fiercest heat of the day was past. Springing up, +I commenced dressing with some trepidation, for I expected to meet +the mistress of the house at supper-time. My toilet was nearly +completed when I heard in the hall the patter of childish feet, while +a round, bright eye was applied to the keyhole. It was the same +which had looked at me in the parlor, and anxious to see its owner, I +stepped out of the door just as a fairy creature with golden curls +started to run away. I was too quick for her, however, and catching +her in my arms, I pushed back the clustering ringlets from her brow, +and gazing into her sunny face, asked her name. + +Raising her white, waxen hand, she did for me the office I had done +for her, viz. pushed back my curls, and looking in my face, answered, +"Ma says it's _Jessica_, but Lina, Hal, and Uncle Dick call me +_Jessie_, and I like that a heap the best. You are our new +governess, ain't you?" + +She was singularly beautiful, and yet it was not so much the +regularity of her features, nor the clearness of her complexion which +made her so. It was the light which shone in her lustrous blue eyes, +which gave her the expression of an angel, for such she was--an angel +in her southern home, which, without her would have been dark and +cheerless. Her brother whom she called _Hal_, was three years older, +and not nearly so handsome. He was very dark, and it seemed to me +that I had seen a face like his before; but ere I could remember +where, a faint voice from the piazza, which faced the east and was +now quite cool, called out, "Halbert, Halbert, come here." + +"That's ma," said Jessie, getting down from my arms. "That's +ma--come and see her," and following her, I soon stood in the +presence of Mrs. Lansing, who was reclining rather indolently in a +large willow chair, while at her back was a negress half asleep, but +appearing wide awake whenever her mistress moved. + +She was a chubby, rosy-cheeked woman, apparently thirty-five years of +age. Her eyes were very black, and she had a habit of frequently +shutting them, so as to show off the long, fringed eyelashes. On the +whole, I thought, she was quite prepossessing in her appearance, an +opinion, however, which I changed ere long; for by the time I reached +her, there was a dark cloud on her brow, evidently of displeasure or +of disappointment. Still she was very polite, offering me her +jeweled hand, and saying, "Miss Lee, I suppose. You are welcome to +Georgia;" then, after an instant, she added, "You don't look at all +like I thought you would." + +I was _uglier_ than she expected, I presumed, and the tears started +to my eyes as I replied, "I wrote to you that I was very plain, but +after a little I shall look better; I am tired now with traveling." + +A strange, peculiar smile flitted over her face, while she intently +regarded me as if to assure herself of my sanity. I was puzzled, and +in my perplexity I said something about returning home, if my looks +were so disagreeable. "They were used to me there, and didn't mind +it," I said; at the same time leaning my head against the +vine-wreathed pillars, I sobbed aloud. Lithe as a kitten, little +Jessie sprang up behind me, and winding her arms around my neck, +asked why I cried. + +"Did ma make you cry?" she said. "Uncle Dick says she makes all the +governesses cry." + +"Jessica, Jessica, get down this moment," said the lady. "I did not +intend to hurt Miss Lee's feelings, and do not understand how I could +have done so. She is either acting a part, or else she strangely +misunderstands me." + +I never acted a part in my life, and, somewhat indignant, I wiped +away my tears and asked "what she meant." + +There was the same smile on her face which I had noticed before, as +she said, "Do you really think yourself ugly?" + +Of course I did. I had never thought otherwise, for hadn't I been +told so ever since I was a child no larger than Jessie, and the +impression thus early received had never been eradicated. Thus I +answered her, and she believed me, for she replied, "You are +mistaken, Miss Lee, for however plain you might have been in +childhood, you are not so now. Neither do I understand how with +those eyes, that hair and brow, you can think yourself ugly. I do +not believe you meant to deceive me, but, to tell the truth, I am +disappointed; but that cannot now be helped, and we'll make the best +of it." + +Perfectly astonished, I listened to her remarks, giving her the +credit of meaning what she said, and for the first time in my life, I +felt as I suppose folks must feel who think they are handsome! After +this little storm was over, she evidently exerted herself to be +agreeable for a few moments, and then rather abruptly asked me how +old I was. + +"Not quite eighteen!" she repeated in some surprise. "Why I supposed +you were _twenty-five_ at least! Don't you think she looks older +than _Ada_?" turning to Lina, who answered quickly, "Oh, no, mother, +nothing like as old. Why, I shouldn't think her over seventeen at +the most." + +Now among my other misfortunes I numbered that of "looking old as the +hills," so I didn't care particularly for what they said, though it +struck me as rather singular that Mrs. Lansing should thus discuss me +in my presence; but this thought was lost in the more absorbing one +as to _who_ the _Ada_ could be of whom she had spoken. Possibly it +was Ada Montrose, though I ardently hoped to the contrary, for well I +knew there was no happiness for me where she was. Thinking it would +be on a par with the questions put to me, I was on the point of +asking who _Ada_ was, when we were summoned to supper, which +consisted mostly of broiled chickens, strong coffee, iced milk, egg +bread, and hoecakes, if I except the row of sables who grouped +themselves around the table, and the _feather girl_, whose efforts to +keep awake amused me so much that I almost forgot to eat. We were +nearly through when a handsome mulatto boy entered and handed a +letter to his mistress, which she immediately opened, holding it so +that the address could be read by Halbert, who, after spelling it +out, exclaimed, "That's from Uncle Dick, I know!" + +"Is he coming home?" asked Jessie, dropping her knife and fork, while +even Lina, who seldom evinced much interest in anything, roused up +and repeated the question which Jessie had asked. + +"Yes. He is in New York now," said Mrs. Lansing; "and will be here +in a week." + +"Good!" exclaimed Halbert. + +"Oh, I'm right glad," said Jessie, while Lina asked if _Ada_ was with +him. + +"No," returned Mrs. Lansing. "She is still in Paris with her cousin, +and will not return until autumn." + +"I'm glad of that," said Lina, to which Hal rejoined, "And so am I. +She's so proud and stuck up, I can't bear her." + +"Children, children," spoke Mrs. Lansing, rather sternly, at the same +time rising from the table. + +It was not yet sunset; and as soon as we were again assembled upon +the piazza, Halbert and Jessie, who were never still, asked +permission to "run up to Uncle Dick's, and tell the servants he was +coming home." + +Mrs. Lansing made no objection; and then they proposed that I should +accompany them. Feeling that a walk would do me good, I turned +towards Mrs. Lansing, for her consent. It was given, of course; but +had I known her better I should have detected a shade of displeasure +on her face. + +"You had better go too," said she to Lina; but Lina was too listless +and indolent, and so we went without her, little Jessie holding my +hand, and jumping instead of walking. + +"Eva's mighty lazy," said she, at last; "don't you think so!" + +"Who's lazy?" I asked; and she replied-- + +"Thar, I done forgot again, and called her Eva. Her name is +Evangeline, and we used to call her Eva, until mother read a bad book +that had little Eva in it, and then she called her Lina." + +"'Twan't a bad book, neither," exclaimed Halbert, stopping suddenly; +"Uncle Dick said 'twan't; but it made mother mad, I tell you, and now +when she gets rarin' he calls her _Mrs. St. Clare_." + +I needed no one to tell me that it was "Uncle Tom," to which he +referred, but I said nothing except to chide the children for their +negro language. + +"I know we talk awful," said Jessie, brushing her curls from her +eyes. "Uncle Dick says we do, but I mean to learn better. I don't +talk half like I used to." + +I could not help smiling in spite of myself upon the little creature +bounding and frisking at my side. _Uncle Dick_ seemed to be her +oracle, and after looking around to make sure that no one heard me, I +asked "who he was?" + +"Why, he's Uncle Dick," said she; "the bestest uncle in the world;" +while Halbert added, "He's got a heap of money, too; and once, when +ma thought I was asleep, I heard her tell Lina, that if he didn't get +married it would be divided between us, and I should have the most, +'cause I'm named after him, Richard Halbert Delafield Lansing, and +they call me _Hal_, for short. I told Uncle Dick what mother said, +and I tell you, he looked blacker'n a nigger; and somehow, after that +he took to ridin' and foolin' with Ada, wonderfully." + +As yet everything with me was comparatively conjecture. I did not +know positively that the _Uncle Dick_ of the children was the "_dark +man_" of Rosa Lee; but the answer to my next question would decide +it, and half tremblingly was it put. "Who is this Ada? What is her +other name?" + +"_Ada Montrose_, and she lives with us. Uncle Dick is her guardian," +said Halbert, throwing a bit of dirt at the negro boy who accompanied +us, and who returned the young gentleman's salute with interest. + +I was satisfied, and did not wish to hear any more. I should meet +him again, and tinged as my temperament is with a love of the +marvellous, I could not help believing that Providence had led me +there. By this time we had reached "Sunny Bank," as it was very +appropriately called, and never before had I seen so lovely a spot. +The grounds, which were very spacious, were surrounded on all sides +by a hedge of the beautiful Cherokee rose, and, unlike those of Cedar +Grove, were laid out with perfect taste and order. Mr. Delafield, as +I afterwards learned, had spent much time at the North, and in the +arrangement of his house and grounds, he had not only imitated, but +far surpassed the style of the country seats which are so often found +within a few miles of our eastern cities, For this he was in a +measure indebted to Dame Nature, who at the South scatters her favors +with a lavish hand, sometimes beautifying and adorning objects far +better than the utmost skill of man could do. The gate at the +entrance of Sunny Bank was a huge wooden structure, having for its +_posts_ two immense oak trees, around whose trunks the graceful ivy +twined, and then hung in fanciful festoons from several of the lower +branches. + +As I had supposed, the house itself stood upon a slight elevation, +and the walk which led up to it was bordered on either side by the +mock orange, whose boughs, meeting overhead, formed an effectual +screen from the rays of the sun. The building, though fashioned in +the same style as that of Mrs. Lansing, was much larger, and had +about it a far more stylish air. Much of the furniture had been +brought from New York, Halbert said; adding that "all the floors were +covered with matting in the summer, and elegant Turkey carpets in the +winter." + +In the rear of the house were the cabins of the negroes, who were +lounging idly about, some on the ground, some in the doors, and some +stretched at full length upon the back of the piazza, evidently +enjoying the cool evening breeze. At sight of us, they roused up a +little, and when Halbert, after announcing that I was Miss Lee, the +new governess, further informed them that their master was coming +home in a few days, they instantly gathered round us, evincing so +much joy as to astonish me, who had heretofore looked upon a southern +slaveholder as a tyrant greatly dreaded by his vassals. + +"You must like Mr. Delafield very much," I ventured to remark to one +old lady, whose hair was white as wool. + +"_Like_ Mass'r Richard!" said she, rolling up her eyes. "Lor' bless +you, miss, _like_ don't begin to 'spress it. Why, I farly worships +him; for didn't I tend him when he was a nussin' baby? and hain't +these old arms toted him more'n a million of miles?" + +Here her voice was drowned by the others, all of whom united in +declaring him the "berry best mass'r in Georgy." This did not, of +course, tend in any way to diminish the interest which I felt in the +stranger; and, ere I was aware of it, I found myself anticipating his +return almost as anxiously as the negroes themselves. + +It was dark when we reached Cedar Grove; and as there was company in +the parlor, I went immediately to my room. I had not been there +long, however, when a servant was sent up, saying, that "Mrs. Lansing +wished me to come down and play." + +This was an ordeal which I greatly dreaded; for, from what I had seen +of Mrs. Lansing, I knew she would criticise my performance closely; +and fearing inability to acquit myself at all creditably, I trembled +violently as I descended to the parlor, which was nearly full of +visitors. + +"Miss Lee, ladies," said Mrs. Lansing, at the same time motioning +towards the music-stool as the seat I was expected to occupy. + +There was a film before my eyes as I took my post and nervously +turned over the leaves of a music-book; which, by the way, was wrong +side up, though I didn't know it then! I have heard much of _stage +fright_, and sure am I, that never did poor mortal suffer more from +an attack of that nature than did I during the few moments that I sat +there, trying to recall something familiar, something which I knew I +could play. At last, when the patience of the company seemed nearly +exhausted, I dashed off at random, playing _parts_ of two or three +different tunes, changing the key as many times, using the loud pedal +when I should have used the soft, and at last ending with the most +horrid discord to which my ears ever listened. The audience were, +undoubtedly, thunderstruck, for they spoke not for the space of a +minute; and, with a feeling of desperation, I was about to make a +second effort, hoping thereby to retrieve my character, when Mrs. +Lansing said, in a cold, sarcastic voice, "That will do, Miss Lee; we +are perfectly satisfied." Then, turning to a haughty-looking young +lady who sat by the window, she continued: "Come, Miss Porter; you +certainly can't refuse to favor us, _now_." + +With a very consequential air, for which I could not blame her, Miss +Porter took my place, and, without any apparent effort, killed my +poor performance outright; for she executed admirably some of the +most difficult music. When she had finished, the ladies rose to go, +Mrs. Lansing following them to the door, and whispering (I know she +did) something about "her being humbugged again." + +When she returned to the room, I stole a glance at her face, which +was very red, and indicative of anything but good-will towards me. I +felt the hot tears rising, but when, with a bang, she closed the +piano, and turning towards me, demanded "how long I had taken music +lessons," I forced them back, and answered promptly, "five quarters." + +"Only five quarters!" she repeated, in evident amazement. "Why, Lina +has taken _three years_, and she wouldn't consider herself competent +to _teach_, even were she _poor_, and obliged to do so." + +The latter part of this speech I did not fancy; for even if a person +is poor, and obliged to work, they do not often like to be taunted +with it; at least, _I_ didn't, but I couldn't help myself. I was at +the mercy of Mrs. Lansing, who proceeded to say, that "she had often +been deceived by Northern teachers, who thought to palm themselves +off for better scholars than they really were; and now she had almost +come to the conclusion that they were not so well educated as the +majority of Southern girls." + +"_I_, at least, never intended to deceive you," said I; "I told you +in my letter that I was _not_ an accomplished musician, and still you +consented to employ me." + +Here I broke down entirely, and wept passionately, telling her, in +broken sentences, that "however mortifying it would be, I was willing +to go back, if she wished it." + +At this point, little Jessie, who all the time had been present, came +to my side, and winding her arms around my neck, said, "You sha'n't +go home. We like you, Hal and me, and you sha'n't go--shall she, +Hal?" + +Thus appealed to, Hal took up my cause, which he warmly defended; +telling his mother "she made every governess cry, and told them they +didn't know anything, when they _did_, for Uncle Dick said so, and +_he_ knew; and that, as for music, Miss Lee played a _heap_ better +than Lina, because she played something _new_--something he never +heard before." + +"Nor any one else," muttered Mrs. Lansing, while Hal continued, +"Uncle Dick says, the best teachers sometimes don't play at all, and +Miss Lee sha'n't go home." + +Very faintly, I repeated my willingness to do so, if Mrs. Lansing +thought best; to which she replied, "I will deal fairly with you, +Miss Lee. I am disappointed in your musical abilities, and if I find +that you are deficient in other things, I shall be obliged to dismiss +you; but for a few days I will keep you on trial." + +"Uncle Dick won't let you send her away, I know," said Hal; and this, +I am inclined to think, determined her upon getting rid of me before +his return. + +Still, I was ostensibly _upon trial_, and whoever has been in a +similar situation, will readily understand that I could not, of +course, do myself justice. With Mrs. Lansing's prying eyes +continually upon me, I really acted as though I were half-witted; and +by the close of the second day, I myself began to doubt the soundness +of my mind, wondering why the folks at home had never discovered my +stupidity. Continual excitement kept my cheeks in a constant glow, +while the remainder of my face was quite pale, and several times, in +their mother's presence, the children told me "how handsome I was!" +This annoyed her--and on the morning of the third day, she informed +me that she would defray my expenses back to Massachusetts, where I +could tell them I was _too young_ to suit her; adding, that I might +as well go the next morning. This was a death-blow to my hopes; and +so violent was the shock, that I could not even weep. Hal and Jessie +were furious, declaring I should not go; and when I convinced them +that I must, they insisted upon my teaching that day, at all events. + +To this I consented; and as Mrs. Lansing had now no object in +watching me, she absented herself from the schoolroom entirely, +leaving me to do as I pleased. The consequence was, that my benumbed +faculties awoke again to life, everything which, for the last ten +days, I seemed to have forgotten, came back to me; while even the +children noticed how differently I appeared. + + + + +CHAPTER XXI. + +UNCLE DICK. + +The day was drawing to a close. The children's lessons were over, +the last I was to hear. Their books were piled away awaiting the +arrival of my successor, and at my request I was left in the +schoolroom alone--alone with my grief, which was indeed bitter and +hard to bear, for I knew that injustice had been done me, and most +keenly I felt the mortification of returning home in disgrace. Very +beautiful to me seemed that fair south land of which I had dreamed so +oft, and I felt that I could not leave it. + +Through the open window I heard the shouts of the children, but I did +not heed them, nor observe that throughout the entire house there +seemed to be an unusual commotion. An hour went by, and then in the +hall I heard the voice of Jessie, and the words she uttered sent an +electric thrill through my nerves, and brought me to my feet, for +they were, "Come this way, Uncle Dick. I reckon she's in the +schoolroom." + +The next moment he stood before me, the _dark man_, scanning me +curiously, but still without anything like rudeness in his gaze. + +"Uncle Dick's come. This is him," said Jessie, leading him towards +the spot where I stood. + +A bright beautiful smile broke over his strongly marked features, and +I felt as if a gleam of sunlight had shone for an instant over my +pathway. Taking my hand in his, he bade Jessie leave us, as he +wished to see me alone. She started to obey, but ere she reached the +door, she turned back and asking him to stoop down, whispered in his +ear, loudly enough for me to hear, "I want you to like her." + +"Of course I shall," he replied, and again that smile broke over his +face. + +I did not expect him to recognize me, for with the exception of the +night at the theater he had never fairly seen my features, and still +I was conscious of a feeling of disappointment when I saw that he +evidently had no suspicion of ever having met me before. When I +spoke, however, and he heard the sound of my voice, he started and +looked me more fully in the face; but whatever his thoughts might +have been, he seemed to be satisfied that he was mistaken, and +seating himself at my side, he commenced conversing with me as +familiarly as if he had known me all my life. Gradually our +conversation turned upon looks, and ere I was aware of it I passed +through what I now know to have been a pretty thorough examination of +all the branches which Mrs. Lansing had wished me to teach, but so +adroitly was the whole thing managed that it seemed like a quiet, +pleasant talk, though I did wonder at his asking so many questions. +French was the last subject discussed, and here I was at fault, for +my pronunciation I well knew was bad, although Mr. Delafield, who was +himself a fine French scholar, told me it was quite as good as the +majority of the Americans who had neither lived in Paris, nor had the +advantage of a native teacher. + +"You play, I believe. I would like to hear you," he said at last, +laying his hand on my shoulder, as if he would lead me to the parlor. + +Instantly the blood rushed to my face, for since the night of my +disgrace I had not touched the piano, neither did I wish to again. +So I tried to excuse myself, and when he insisted, I finally said, +with my eyes full of tears, "Please excuse me, sir, for I can't play. +I failed before your sister, and I shall do the same before you." + +"No you won't," he replied, at the same time drawing my arm within +his and leading me towards the door. "You have nothing to fear, Miss +Lee, and if you acquit yourself half as creditably here as you have +elsewhere, I shall be satisfied." + +A faint perception of the truth began to dawn upon me, and I looked +up at him so earnestly that he stopped and smiling down upon me, +said, "You have taught a district school in New England, I believe?" + +"Yes, sir," I answered. + +"And you were examined, of course?" + +"Yes, sir, and got a certificate, too," I said eagerly. + +"I presume you did," he continued, "and if necessary I can give you +another, for I have been doing nothing more or less than trying to +find out how much you know. As I have before hinted, I am perfectly +satisfied, and unless you leave from choice, you will remain at Cedar +Grove." + +He spoke as one having full authority to do as he pleased, and I +instinctively felt that though nominally Mrs. Lansing was mistress +there, he, in reality, was the leader, the head, whose bidding every +one obeyed. The change from utter despondency to almost perfect +happiness was too great, and withdrawing my hand from his arm, I sat +down upon the stairs and cried like a child, while he stood, looking +down upon me and thinking, I dare say, that I was a very foolish +girl. At last, when I thought his patience was nearly exhausted, I +wiped my eyes, and starting up, said, "You have made me very happy, +Mr. Delafield, for I could not have borne the disgrace of being sent +home as incompetent. I can play for you now, or for Mrs. Lansing +either." + +And the result proved that I was right, for I exceeded my own +expectations, and was astonished at myself. + +"Angeline," said he, in a slightly commanding voice, as that lady +looked curiously in at the door, "Angeline, come here;" and she +crossed over to his side, where he detained her by placing his arm +around her waist. + +For a moment then I wavered, for though I could not fee, I could feel +the haughty gaze of the large black eyes, which I knew were bent upon +me. + +"You have done well, Miss Lee," he said, when at last I arose from +the instrument, at the same time playfully touching my cheeks, which +were burning with feverish excitement. + +That night, after I had retired to my room, Halbert and Jessie came +to the door, requesting permission to come in. I admitted them, when +Jessie, jumping into my lap, said, "Oh, I'm so glad you are going to +stay. Hal says so." + +"Yes," put in Hal, "Uncle Dick told me that you mustn't be sent away, +for you were a heap better scholar than she had represented you to +be." + +"Perhaps it will not be as Mr. Delafield says," I remarked; and Hal +quickly rejoined, "Yes, it will; ma does just what he tells her to +do; and then, too, he pays the governess, for I heard him say so, and +he told her if you were dismissed 'twas the last one he'd hire. And +he said she must treat you better than she did Miss Rawson, for you +were very young, and little things hurt your feelings, and when Ada +came home, she mustn't domineer over you, for he wouldn't allow it. +Oh, I like Uncle Dick. Don't you?" + +The moonlight was streaming across the floor, but it did not reveal +the blush which deepened on my cheek as I faintly answered "Yes," +bidding him at the same time not to tell of it, for I began to feel +afraid of the boy's loquacity. That night I dreamed of "Uncle Dick," +whose name was the last which sounded in my ears when I fell asleep, +and the first of which I thought when I awoke in the morning. As I +was dressing, I heard little Jessie on the piazza, singing in her +childish way, "_I_ love _Un_cle Dick, I do, and _so_ does _Hal_, and +_so_ does _Mis_-ses Lee!" + +"Who told you _that_, Pussy?" asked a voice which I recognized as Mr. +Delafield's, and very nervously I listened for Jessie's answer, which +was, "Oh, I know she does. Hal asked her didn't she like you, and +she said she did." + +"Rather early to avow a preference, I think. I shouldn't wonder if a +Miss Rawson performance were ot be enacted a second time," said +another voice, which I knew to be that of Mrs. Lansing, who had +joined her brother upon the piazza. + +"Angeline," said Mr. Delafield, somewhat sternly, "don't be foolish. +If Halbert asked Miss Lee if she liked me, wasn't it the most natural +thing in the world for her to say 'Yes.' I do wish you'd rid +yourself of the impression that every girl who looks at me is in love +with me, or that I am in love with every lady to whom I choose to be +polite." + +"Do you think Miss Lee pretty?" asked Mrs. Lansing, without paying +any attention to his last remark. + +Up to this point I could not well help overhearing their +conversation, for I was arranging my hair before the mirror which +stood near the window; but now there was no longer any necessity for +my remaining there, and I resolutely walked away, though I would have +given much to have heard his answer. He had gone home when I went +down to the breakfast-room, where I found Mrs. Lansing, who greeted +me rather coldly, and appeared slightly embarrassed. I had purposely +donned my traveling dress, for though Mr. Delafield had said I was to +stay, I felt that she too must do the same ere I had a right to +remain. The sight of my dress seemed to annoy her, for it brought to +her cheeks two bright red spots which grew deeper all the while we +were at breakfast. When it was over, and the children had gone out, +I very composedly asked her "how long before the stage would call for +me." + +Turning her flashing black eyes upon me, she said, "Do you mean to +insult me, Miss Lee? The stage has been gone an hour. I supposed +you knew you were to remain." + +"Mr. Delafield intimated as much," I answered; "but my engagement was +with _you_, not _him_, and until I hear from you that I am expected +to stay, I do not of course feel at liberty to do so." + +She brightened up perceptibly, and after saying something about +Richard's meddling in _her_ affairs, replied, "I presume you were +embarrassed when you first came, and so could not appear to +advantage; and as my brother thinks you are a tolerably fair scholar, +I have decided to keep you." + +I bowed in acquiescence, and she continued: "There is something, +however, which I must first say to you; but as this is not the proper +place, you will go with me to my room." + +I complied with her request, and closing the door, she began with a +long preamble as to the proper way for a young lady to conduct +herself in the presence of gentlemen, especially those who were every +way her superiors. "For instance," said she, "there's my brother +Richard, who is rather noted for his familiar, affectionate manner +towards the ladies. As long as he confines himself to his equals I +do not so much mind it, but when he lavishes his attentions upon my +governesses, I think it wrong, for he might, you know, raise hopes +which of course could never be realized. Now, Miss Rawson was a very +silly girl who thought herself beautiful, and ere I was aware of it +she was deeply in love with Richard. Of course, he cared nothing for +her, even if he did play with and caress her. It is his way, and he +means nothing by it. Then, too, Miss Rawson _was_ rather handsome, +and Richard has always been a passionate admirer of beauty. He used +to say, when he was younger, that he never could love a woman who was +not beautiful, and I've sometimes thought that the sight of a pretty +face completely upset him. For this reason I prefer having a +plain-looking governess. Miss Rawson was far too pretty, and after +my trouble with her I determined to employ none but ugly ones. This +is why I wrote to you concerning your personal appearance, which is, +I am sorry to say, so much more prepossessing than I had reason to +suppose. Still I do not apprehend any difficulty, provided you are +always reserved and distant in Richard's presence, and decline any +attentions he may occasionally offer you. Miss Montrose, of whom you +have heard us speak, will probably be home this summer, and then his +time will be occupied with her. I do not think he will ever marry +any one, but if he does, it will undoubtedly be Ada. I won't detain +you longer," she added, as she saw me try to suppress a yawn; "I +won't detain you any longer than to warn you once more against being +as silly as Miss Rawson was--the foolish thing--only think of it, my +governess in love with my brother, and _he_ a _Delafield_?" + +It _was_ very absurd, I thought; and mentally resolving not to fall +into a like error, I repaired to the schoolroom, where in due time I +was joined by the children, little Jessie bringing me a beautiful +bouquet, which she said "Uncle Dick had arranged for me." + +Feeling anxious to please Mrs. Lansing, my first impulse was to send +the flowers back, but upon second thoughts, I concluded that this +would not come under the head of "attentions," and so all the morning +they stood in the tiny vase, which Halbert brought to hold them, all +except one rosebud which Jessie selected from the group, and twined +among my curls. This at the dinner-table attracted the watchful eye +of my employer, who, without any apparent motive, casually remarked +upon its beauty, saying, "It looked like a species of rose which grew +in her brother's garden," and adding that "she did not know as there +were any of that kind on her grounds." + +I blushed crimson, while Jessie answered, "It didn't grow here. +_Uncle Dick_ brought it to her with a heap more." + +Casting upon me a frowning glance, Mrs. Lansing said, "Seems to me +you have forgotten the conditions on which I kept you." + +This was the first I had heard of _conditions_; but so anxious was I +to retain my situation, that I resolved to please her at all hazards, +and stammering out that "Jessie put it in my hair," I tore it from +among my curls and threw it upon the floor. Then, as soon as dinner +was over, I went up to the schoolroom, and removing the bouquet from +the vase, threw that too, from the window. Very wonderingly, little +Jessie looked up in my face, asking "why I did it," and if "I didn't +love flowers." + +"Very, very much," I answered; "but your mother don't want me to keep +them." + +That afternoon he came to visit us "officially," he said, and when I +saw his winning manner, and how much of sunshine he brought with him, +I did not wonder that one as susceptible as Miss Rawson was +represented to be, should have fallen in love with him. But with me +it was different. _I_ had been warned against his pleasant, +affectionate ways; and so, when in conversing with me and Lina, he +threw his arm around her waist and laid his hand carelessly upon my +shoulder, I moved quickly away, while I was sensible of a deepening +flush upon my face. He seemed puzzled, and for an instant looked +inquiringly at me, as if to ask a reason for my conduct. He was +showing Lina a book of engravings, and after a while called me to +look at a picture which he thought was particularly fine. I complied +with his request, and wishing to see more, took a seat at his side, +when either purposely, or from force of habit, he threw his arm +across the back of my chair. The action reminded me of Dr. Clayton, +and I was feeling somewhat annoyed, when looking up I met the haughty +eyes of Mrs. Lansing, who was passing the door, and had stopped to +look in. This of course embarrassed me, and hardly knowing what I +did, I said rather angrily, "You will oblige me, Mr. Delafield, by +taking your arm from my chair. It does not look well." + +"Certainly," said he, instantly removing it; "I was not before aware +that it was there," and a very peculiar smile was perceptible about +his mouth, as he, too, caught sight of his sister, who, with an +approving nod for me, passed on. + +I could have cried with vexation, for I feared he would think me very +prudish, and I knew well enough that his familiarity was only the +promptings of an unusually kind and affectionate nature. After +staying a few moments longer, he arose to go, saying as he turned +towards me, "Jessie gave you my flowers, I suppose." + +"Yes, sir," I replied, while my face again grew scarlet. "They were +beautiful, and I thank you very much." + +"I am glad to hear it," he continued, looking me steadily in my eyes. +"I thought perhaps, you did not like them when I found them on the +walk, withered and dried by the sun." + +I was trying to think what to say by way of apology for thus treating +his gift, when little Jessie came to my relief, by saying, "She +didn't like to throw 'em away, but ma didn't want her to keep 'em." + +"Ah, yes. I understand it now," said he, adding in an undertone, as +he shook my hand, in accordance with the southern custom of bidding +good-by: "I hope, Miss Lee, you will exercise your own judgment in +such trivial matters as that." + +That night I cried myself to sleep, half wishing I had never come to +Cedar Grove, for I knew Mrs. Lansing would prove an exacting, +unreasonable mistress; and when, Ada came home, my situation, I +thought, would be anything but agreeable; while, worse than all the +rest, was the fear that I had displeased Mr. Delafield, and appeared +very ridiculous in his eyes. Supposing he had put his arm on my +chair, was that any reason why I should get angry and speak to him as +I did? It was his way, and as he had said, he was not himself aware +of what he was doing. Of course, then, he would think me very +foolish, and would ever after treat me with coolness and +indifference. How then was I surprised, when the next morning, in +the presence of his sister, he handed me a much larger and handsomer +bouquet than the one of the preceding day, saying, as he did so, "I +want you to keep this and not throw it away, as you did my other one." + +Mrs. Lansing's face, which had been unusually placid and serene, now +looked cloudy and disturbed; but she said nothing; neither did she +ever again make any allusion to the flowers which so frequently came +to me from Sunny Bank. One reason for this might have been that she +was otherwise perfectly satisfied with the conduct of her brother, +which, by the way, was _not_ wholly satisfactory to me! It is true, +he was very polite, very kind; but there was about him a reserve +which I could not understand, for after that little affair in the +schoolroom, he never treated me with the same familiarity which +marked his deportment towards the other young ladies, who came to the +house. He did not like me, I said, and the thought that I was +disagreeable to _him_ made me very unhappy. To be sure, he was +almost constantly at Cedar Grove, where he spent most of the time in +the schoolroom, "superintending us," he told his sister, who, +believing me rather inefficient, made no objection to his supposed +supervision of Lina's studies. He did not often talk much to me, but +I frequently met the earnest gaze of his piercing dark eyes, +particularly when little Jessie sat in my lap, listening to my +instructions; and once when Herbert asked him for "a +copy,"--something beginning with "R," he wrote "Rosa Lee, Meadow +Brook, Massachusetts." Still he disliked me--I was sure of that; and +though I did not then know why it was, the impression that I was to +him an object of aversion made me unhappy, and almost every day I +cried, while Mrs. Lansing more than once told me that "she did not +believe the South agreed with me, for I was not half so _plump_ and +rosy as when I first came." + +About this time, too, a Miss Dean, from the village, who had evinced +quite a liking for me, told me, confidentially, that Mr. Delafield +and Ada were certainly engaged; adding, that "it was sometimes +sickening to see them together"--a fact I could not doubt, knowing +him as I did, and remembering Ada's demeanor towards Herbert when +they were engaged. From the same source, too, I learned that Mr. +Montrose and the elder Mr. Delafield had been warm friends; and that +the latter, who died when both Mrs. Lansing and Richard were quite +young, had committed them to the care of Mr. Montrose, who was to +them the kindest of fathers until the time of his death, which +occurred a few years after Mrs. Lansing's marriage, when Richard was +just of age. To _his_ guardianship, therefore, as to that of a +brother, had Mr. Montrose left his daughter, then a beautiful girl of +seventeen; and since that time she had lived with Mrs. Lansing, who, +though she appeared to love the young orphan, still opposed her +marriage with her brother; not from any aversion to Ada, but because +she did not wish Richard to marry at all, as in case he did not, his +property would, in all probability, fall to her children, she being +the only heir. When I asked her why Mr. Delafield was worth so much +more than Mrs. Lansing, she replied, that the elder Mr. Delafield, in +his will, had left two-thirds of his property to his son, bequeathing +the other third to his daughter, whose husband had wasted nearly the +whole in his extravagant manner of living. Cedar Grove, too, she +said, was mortgaged to Richard for more than it was worth, and it was +wholly owing to his forbearance and extreme generosity that Mrs. +Lansing was enabled to support her present style of living. This, +she said, aside from Mrs. Lansing's hope that her children would one +day inherit her brother's wealth, was a sufficient reason why she +wished him to remain a bachelor, as the presence of a wife at Sunny +Bank would, in all probability, lessen his liberality towards +herself. Miss Dean, who seemed to be well posted, also told me that, +in case Mrs. Lansing saw her brother was determined to marry, she +would, of course, prefer that he should marry Ada, who was quite a +favorite, inasmuch as she had money of her own, and was connected +with one of the first families in South Carolina. + +All this I believed, and when I saw how anxious Mrs. Lansing appeared +for Ada's return, and how much interest Mr. Delafield, too, seemed to +take in her, I felt sure that matters were at last amicably arranged, +and that, for once, rumor was right in saying that Sunny Bank would, +in the autumn, be graced by the presence of a mistress. Latterly, +Mr. Delafield had been making some repairs, and only a few days +before, when I chanced to be there with Jessie, he had taken me +through his library into a little, pleasant, airy room, which he was +fitting up with great elegance. + +"This," said he, laughingly, "I design as the boudoir of _Mrs. +Delafield_, when I shall be fortunate enough to boast such an +appendage to my household; and as a woman's taste is supposed to be +superior to that of men, I want your opinion. How do you like it? +Do you think it would suit _my wife_, if I had one?" + +Of course he meant _Ada_, and in fancy I saw her reclining upon the +luxurious lounges, or gazing out upon the vine-wreathed piazza, and +wealth of flowers, which greeted my view when I looked from the large +bay window. For an instant I dared not trust my voice to speak, and +when at last I did so, I am sure it must have trembled, for he came +to my side and looked me earnestly in the face, while he smiled at my +answer. + +"It ought to suit her, unless her home heretofore has been Paradise." + +After that I had not the least doubt of his engagement with Ada, and +I began seriously to think of going back to Meadow Brook to take +charge of a select school, which was about to be opened there. I had +now been in Georgia about four months, and one night I went down to +the pleasant summer-house at the foot of the garden. It was a +beautiful moonlight night and the air was almost oppressive with the +sweet fragrance of the flowers. Why I went there I hardly know, only +I fancied I could better make up my mind as to my future course, if I +were alone and in the open air. "Nobody likes me here," I said to +myself, as I took a seat within the arbor, "nobody but Halbert and +Jessie. Mrs. Lansing is freaky and cross, Lina, selfish and +indifferent, while Mr. Delafield thinks only of Ada's return, which I +so much dread, and to be rid of meeting her I will go home before she +comes." So I decided that on the morrow, I would make known my +determination to Mrs. Lansing, who I fancied would be glad, while Mr. +Delafield would not be affected either way. _I_ was nothing to +_him_--_he_ was nothing to _me_--so I reasoned, and then I made plans +for the future, just as other maidens of eighteen have done, when +their heart was aching with a heavy pain, whose cause they did not +understand. I should never marry--_that_ was a settled point--I +should teach school all my days, and by the time I was twenty-five +(it seemed a great way off then) I should have a school of my own, +"LEE SEMINARY" I would call it, and I had just completed the +arrangement of the grounds, which somehow bore a strong resemblance +to those of Sunny Bank, when I was roused from my reverie by the +sound of a footstep, and in a moment Mr. Delafield stood at the +entrance of the summer-house. He evidently did not expect to find me +there, for he started back at first, and then, hoping he did not +intrude, came to my side, saying, "A penny for your thoughts, Miss +Lee, provided they are not as gloomy as your face would indicate." + +"You can have them for nothing," I returned, elevating my eyebrows, +and drawing down the corners of my mouth as if I felt that in some +way he had injured me. + +"You are _blue_ to-night, and have been so for several days. What is +the matter?" he asked, at the same time throwing his arm around my +waist with his olden familiarity." + +Quickly remembering himself, however, he withdrew it, saying as he +did so, "I beg your pardon, Miss Lee. I am so in the habit of taking +such liberties, that I forgot myself!" and he moved off a little +distance. I could have cried with vexation, for though it might have +been, improper, I was perfectly willing to sit there with his arm +around me! It might have dispelled all idea of the "LEE SEMINARY" of +which I was to be Principal! But he gave me no such opportunity, and +folding his arms as if to keep them in their place, he continued, +"But tell me, Miss Lee, what _is_ the matter. You do not seem +yourself?" + +It was perfectly proper for me to tell him, I thought, and very +deliberately I unfolded to him my plan of returning home within a +week, if Mrs. Lansing were willing, which I was sure she would be, as +she had never been quite satisfied with my acquirements. When I had +finished speaking, I turned towards him, not to see what effect my +words had produced, for I had not the most remote idea that he would +care. Great then was my surprise, when I saw the blank expression of +his face, which looked darker than ever. Starting up, he walked two +or three times rapidly across the little arbor, and then resuming his +seat, said gently, "Have you been unhappy here, Miss Lee?" + +I could hardly repress my tears as I told him how much I liked the +south land, and how I should hate to leave it. + +"Why then do you do so?" he asked; and I answered "I can do more good +at home; nobody likes me here." + +He came nearer to my side, as he said, "Nobody likes you! oh, Rose, +there is _one_ at least who more than likes"---- + +It was the first time he had ever called me Rose, and it thrilled me +with an indefinable emotion; but so impressed was I with the idea of +his engagement with Ada, that I never dreamed of interpreting his +words, as I now think he meant I should; and ere he could say more, I +interrupted him with, "Yes--little Jessie loves me, I know, and when +I think of her, I would fain stay." + +Still nearer to me he came, as he said, "And think you Jessie is the +only one who loves you?" + +If ever Mrs. Lansing's belief that I was _non compos mentis_ was +verified, it was then; for with the utmost stupidity I answered, +"Why, no; _Halbert_ likes me, but both he and Jessie will forget me +when I am gone, and learn to love another." + +I think he was quite disgusted; for with a slight gesture of +impatience he changed his manner, and in a very businesslike way +began to reason the case with me, urging a great many reasons why I +should not leave; the most potent one with me, being the fact that +_he_ wanted me to stay--"he would miss me very much," he said, "for +he liked my society--it was a pleasure to talk with me, for he was +sure I meant what I said; I was natural--truthful--so different from +most of the young ladies (of course he excepted Ada), and then, too, +it seemed as if he had known me always, or at least, had met me +before, for my voice was familiar." + +I could not tell him of our meeting in Boston, but I saw no harm in +reminding him of the night, when for a few hours I was his +traveling-companion, and so to his last remark, I answered, "We have +met before, in the cars between Attica and Albany." + +In some surprise he looked earnestly at me a moment, and then said, +"Is it possible? Why have you never mentioned it before?" + +"Because, sir," I replied, "I did not suppose you would remember me." + +He appeared thoughtful for a time, and then again, looking closely at +me, said, "I did not, I believe, get a glimpse of your features then, +and still it seems as if I had seen them before--or something like +them. At all events, I sometimes dream of a childish face, which +must resemble you as you were a few years ago." + +Once I half determined to remind him of the little girl who fainted +at the theater; but ere I did so, he continued. "When I met you in +the cars, if I mistake not, you spoke of Miss Montrose. Did you ever +see her? but of course not," he added, ere I had time to reply. I +cannot tell why I shrank from acknowledging my slight acquaintance +with Ada, but I did, and for a moment I said nothing; then thinking +it would be wrong to give him a false impression, I said, "I can +hardly say that I am acquainted with Miss Montrose; but I have met +her several times at my uncle's in Boston, where I spent the winter, +four years ago." + +Again he bent forward as if to scan my face, while he replied, +"Indeed! Were you in Boston then? It is strange Ada never spoke of +you, or you of her before. Was there a misunderstanding between you?" + +"Oh, no," I answered quickly; "she was a fashionable young lady, and +I a mere schoolgirl; so, of course, we knew but little of each other." + +"What was your uncle's name?" he inquired; and I answered "Lee," +noticing the while, how the shadow which had settled upon his face at +the mention of Boston, passed gradually away. + +For a moment he was silent, and then rather abruptly, he asked, "Did +you like her?" + +I remembered the time when Dr. Clayton had asked me a similar +question concerning Dell Thompson, and now, as then, I answered +evasively, that "I hardly knew her--she was very beautiful and +accomplished." + +Here he interrupted me by saying, "I did not ask if you thought her +_beautiful_. I asked if you liked her." + +I felt a little annoyed, for I thought he had no right thus to +question me, and forgetting that she was to be his wife, I replied, +"_No, sir, I did not like her_. Neither do I think she liked me, or +my sister who was with me; and this is one reason why I wish to leave +before her return." + +I supposed he would be offended at hearing me speak thus of her, but +he was not; he merely smiled as he answered, "Ada has many faults, I +know, but I do not believe your situation will be less pleasant on +account of her presence. If it is, just state the case to me. I am +competent to manage it, I believe; besides that, it is uncertain how +long she will remain at Cedar Grove." + +He commenced plucking at the green vine-leaves which grew above my +head, while I turned my face away to hide my emotions; for of course, +when Ada left Cedar Grove, it would be as his bride, I thought, and +was surprised when he continued, "The cousin with whom she is +traveling in Europe, has won from her a half promise that she will +spend next winter with her in New Orleans, and if so she will leave +in October; so you see, she can't annoy you long; and now you must +promise me not to leave us unless she prove perfectly disagreeable." + +There is not, I believe, the least coquetry in my nature, and I +replied frankly that I would stay. + +"You have made me very happy, Miss Lee," said he, rising up and +laying his hand upon my head, just as a _father_ might caress his +child, for he was thirty-one and I was eighteen! + +That night I pondered long upon what he had said, recalling every +word and look, and at last, when a ray of light faintly glimmered +upon my _befogged intellect_, I hid my face in the pillow, lest the +moonlight, which shone around me, should read thereon the secret +thought which I scarcely dared to harbor for a moment. Could it be +possible that _he_ loved me, and but that for my unaccountably stupid +blunder in thrusting first Jessie and then Halbert in his face, he +would have told me so! But no--it was impossible. He was probably +engaged to Ada. _She_ was beautiful and rich--_I_ was homely and +poor. It could not be. And then, my reader, did I first awake to +the consciousness of how much I loved him; and how, when he was +wedded to another, the world would be to me naught but a dreary +blank. Anon, I remembered my former affection for Dr. Clayton, and +then I grew calm. I had outgrown that, I said, and in all +probability I should outlive this, my second heart-trouble. So, +falling back upon the "Lee Seminary" as something which was to +comfort me in my lone pilgrimage, I fell asleep and dreamed that Mr. +Delafield's children, amounting in all to a _dozen_, were every one +placed under my special charge! + + + + +CHAPTER XXII. + +ADA. + +She was now daily expected, the vessel in which she had sailed having +landed at New York, and numerous preparations in honor of her arrival +were in progress at Cedar Grove, where she was evidently regarded as +a person of consequence. The best chamber in the house was +appropriated for her use; Mr. Delafield himself taking much interest +in the arrangement of its furniture, and bringing over each morning +fresh bouquets of flowers, which, in costly vases, adorned the +apartment. Every one seemed anxious and expectant, save Jessie and +Halbert, the former of whom did not wish her to come, as she took up +so much of "Uncle Dick's" time, while the latter openly avowed his +dislike, saying, he wished she'd stay in Europe always. + +As for myself, though there was no particular reason why I should do +so, I dreaded her arrival, and when at last, word come to the +schoolroom that she was in the parlor, and the children must come +down to see her, I stole out into the garden, in order that I might +put off the interview with her as long as possible. I knew I must +meet her at the supper-table, and so after a time I went up to my +room to dress, donning a plain white muslin, which I had often been +told became me better than aught else I could wear. Before my toilet +was finished, little Jessie came in and insisted upon twining among +my curls a few simple buds, which, she said, looked "mighty nice," +adding, as she stepped back a pace or two to witness the effect, "I +think you are a heap prettier than Ada; but Uncle Dick don't, 'cause +I asked him, and he said 'Of course Ad was the handsomest.' Hal says +how he's her beau, and I reckon he is, for he kissed her like fury!" + +"He kisses everybody, don't he?" I asked; and she replied,-- + +"Mighty nigh everybody but _you_. I never seen him kiss _you_, and +when I asked him why, he said you wouldn't let him--won't you?" + +"It wouldn't be _proper_," I said, smiling down upon the little +fairy, who, poised on one foot, was whirling in circles, and then +looking up into my face, with her soft dreamy eyes. + +At that moment the supper bell rang, and bounding away, she left me +alone. For full five minutes I waited, trying to summon sufficient +courage to go down, and at last chiding myself for my weakness, I +started for the dining-room. My footsteps were light, as they +evidently were not aware of my approach, for they were talking of me, +and as I reached the door, I heard Jessie, who was giving Ada a +description of her teacher, say, "Why she's the properest person in +the world, for she won't even let Uncle Dick kiss her." + +"Somewhat different from Miss Rawson," said Ada, joining in the +general laugh; at the same time lifting her large, languid eyes, she +saw me, and started slightly, I fancied, as she recognized me. + +She had changed since I saw her last, and her face now wore a weary, +jaded look, while the dark circle beneath her eyelids told of late +hours and heated rooms. + +"Miss Lee--Miss Montrose," said Mrs. Lansing, and the proud Ada bowed +haughtily to the humble governess, who with heightened color took her +accustomed seat at the table. + +"You have seen each other before, I believe," said Mr. Delafield, +looking curiously at both of us, while Mrs. Lansing, in much +surprise, exclaimed, "Seen each other! Where, pray?" + +I waited for Ada to answer, and after staring at me a moment, she +replied, quite indifferently, "Miss Lee's face does seem familiar, +and if I mistake not, I met her _once or twice_ in Boston"--and this +was all she said, if I except a glance, half entreating, half +threatening, which she threw at me from beneath her long, drooping +eyelashes. This glance I did not then understand, but I now know it +to have been prompted by a dread lest I should tell of her engagement +with Herbert Langley, and thus betray her to Mr. Delafield, to whom, +it seems, she had positively denied the whole, solemnly assuring him +that there had never been between them anything more serious than a +mere friendly acquaintance. When, therefore, she saw me, her fears +were awakened, and knowing that I had her secret in my possession, +she looked upon me with suspicion and dislike, while I, wholly +unconscious of her feelings, had not the least intention of ever +speaking of the past, unless circumstances should render it +necessary. But of this she was not aware, and that night, in the +privacy of her room, she communed with herself as to the best means +of counteracting anything which I might say concerning her conduct in +Boston, deciding at last that the surest way of accomplishing her +object was to brand me as a person whose word could not be trusted! +And this she deemed an easy task, inasmuch as no one there had ever +seen or heard of me before. Strange, too, as it may seem, there was +mingled with her distrust of me a slight shade of jealousy lest Mr. +Delafield should in any way notice me. True, I was a poor obscure +girl, earning my daily bread, and on no point could I compete with +her save one, and that was age, I being, as she well knew, eight or +nine years her junior. To be old and unmarried was with her almost a +crime, and as year after year passed on, leaving her still Ada +Montrose, her horror of single blessedness increased, while at the +same time she seemed to look upon those much younger than herself as +almost her enemies, especially if they came between her and Mr. +Delafield, who, as the world goes, was at the age of thirty-one more +likely to choose a girl of eighteen than one of twenty-seven. This, +then, was my fault. I was young and had also in my possession a +secret which she did not wish to have divulged, for well she knew +that one as upright and honorable as Mr. Delafield would despise a +woman who could stoop to a falsehood as she had done. + +"No, it shall not be!" said she, as she sat alone in her room with +her face resting upon her hands; "it shall not be! I will thwart her +and she shall never triumph over me, as did her pale-faced sister, +but for whom I might now have borne the title of Mrs. instead of +trembling lest some one should ask how old I am!" And the proud +belle felt a pang of envy towards my poor widowed sister whose heart +was buried in the grave of her unfortunate husband. + +Not that she (Ada) had ever cared particularly for Herbert Langley, +but women of the world sometimes bestow their hand where the heart +cannot be given, and thus might she have done had not circumstances +prevented, for she had then no hope of ever winning her guardian. + +Here, ere we proceed farther, it may be well to relate briefly her +past history, going back to the time when on his death-bed her father +had not only given her to the charge of Mr. Delafield, but had also +made a request that, if it were consistent with his feelings, Richard +would one day make her his wife. As we have said elsewhere, Mr. +Delafield was a great admirer of beauty, and when he looked upon the +exceedingly lovely face of the youthful, Ada, and thought of her as a +lonely orphan, his heart was touched, and he found no difficulty in +promising to protect her, and also to make her his wife, if, upon a +more intimate acquaintance, he found her all he could wish her to be. +That he did not find her thus was proved by the fact that nearly ten +years had elapsed since her father's death, and she was Ada Montrose +still, while he, as he grew older, seemed less likely to find any one +who fully came up to his standard of excellence; beauty, in reality, +now being of minor importance, notwithstanding his sister's assertion +that he would never marry one who had not a pretty face. + +Upon this point, however, Ada had some doubts; for if beauty were +what he desired, she still possessed it to an uncommon degree, and it +did not seem to move him in the least. Rumor, indeed, said they were +on the eve of marriage, but she knew better, for never yet had he +really told her in earnest that he loved her. It is true that years +before, when she first came a weeping orphan to Cedar Grove, he had +devoted himself to her entirely, feeling, perhaps, a little proud of +his ward, to whom he sometimes talked of love, or hinted vaguely of +the time when she would be his bride, as they wandered together +beneath the whispering pines, which grew around his home, and once, +when she was in Boston, he had actually made up his mind to offer +himself immediately and take her to Sunny Bank as its mistress. To +this resolution he was urged by her cousin, a strong-minded woman, +who, in visiting at Cedar Grove, had labored to impress upon him the +sense of the duty he owed not only to her father but to Ada herself, +who was represented as loving him devotedly, and who was said to have +made a vow never to marry unless it were her guardian. Very +artfully, too, did Mrs. Johnson insinuate that her illness, of which +they had heard, had its origin in "hope deferred which maketh the +heart sick." + +The knowledge that a beautiful girl loves you--nay, is dying for you, +is sufficient, I suppose, to touch the feelings of men less +susceptible to female charms than Richard Delafield, and acting upon +the impulse of the moment, he started off without, however, leaving +any word as to his destination. Arrived in Boston, he went to the +Revere House, where, as we know, he casually heard of Ada's +engagement with Herbert Langley. To say he was not disappointed +would hardly be just, for his self-pride was touched in knowing that +Ada had given her affections to another, and that other not a very +worthy object, if the word of his gossiping informer was to be +trusted. Too much displeased even to see her, he had left the city +immediately, declaring that he would never again think of marriage +with any one. + +As the reader will remember, Ada heard of him through one of her +acquaintance, and from something her cousin had written, she half +guessed the nature of his visit. Accordingly on her return to +Georgia she several times in his presence laughingly referred to the +gossiping story, which, she said, some of the Bostonians got up +concerning her and a _millionaire_, positively denying it, and +wishing people would let her alone! But all this was to no purpose. +Mr. Delafield's impulse had subsided, and though his manner towards +her was always kind, affectionate, and brotherly, he never spoke to +her of love or marriage, except sometimes to ask her teasingly "if +they were not both of them almost old enough to get married." + +Still she did not despair, for of his own accord he had accompanied +her and her cousin to Europe, whither he had always intended to go, +and though he had left them some months before, Mrs. Johnson was +willing to leave Paris, where Ada's beauty attracted much attention +from the polite Frenchmen, she would not believe he was at all weary +of _her_, but rather, as he had said, that his _business_ required +his immediate return to America. + +Latterly Mrs. Lansing had in a measure espoused her cause, and +knowing, as she did, of the recent repairs at Sunny Bank, said by +Richard to be for the benefit of his bride, she began again to +entertain sanguine hopes of eventually becoming Mrs. Delafield, +provided the governess did not, by her foolish tattling, mar her +prospects. + +Such, then, was the state of affairs when I was the burden of Ada's +thoughts, as she sat alone in her room on the first night after her +return home. For a time she mused with her face in her hands, then +lifting up her head and throwing back the silken tresses, which fell +over her brow, she gazed long and earnestly at herself in the +opposite mirror. + +"Yes, I am fading," she said at last, "and each year my chance for +winning him grows less, and if this _Lee girl_ should tell, it would +take from me every shadow of hope--but it shall not be. I can +prevent her foolish tattling from doing me harm, and I will." + +Then the better nature of Ada Montrose whispered to her of the great +wrong she was meditating against a poor, defenseless girl, who as yet +had never injured her, and for a moment she wavered. + +"If I only knew she would never tell," said she; "but she _will_, +accidentally if not intentionally. Low-bred people like her are +always bold, and as she becomes better acquainted with me, she may +possibly say something to me about Herbert in the presence of Mr. +Delafield, who will question her, perhaps, and thus learn the whole. +So I'll be prepared. She's nothing but a poor governess, and _my_ +word will be preferred to hers, provided I first give her the +character of a deceiver." + +On awaking next morning her resolution was partially shaken, and +might, perhaps, have been given up entirely, if, in looking from her +window, she had not seen a sight which awoke within her the demon +_jealousy_, by whose aid she could do almost anything. The +_governess_ had arisen early, as was her usual custom, and gone forth +into the garden, where she came unexpectedly upon Mr. Delafield, who, +after expressing his pleasure at meeting her, very quietly drew her +arm within his own, and then walked with her several times through +the garden, casting often admiring glances towards the drooping +figure at his side, who, trembling lest the Argus eyes of Mrs. +Lansing were upon her would fain have been left alone. All this Ada +saw, and as she thought how different was his manner towards Rose +from what it had ever been towards her, a sudden light flashed upon +her. She had not lived twenty-seven years for nothing, and like +Dickens' woman with the "mortified bonnet," she knew the signs, and +with a sinking heart, she exclaimed, "Is it possible that he loves +her?" + +The thought was maddening, and now strengthened tenfold in her +purpose of working the young girl evil, she went forth into the +garden to meet them, nodding coldly to Rosa, and bestowing her +sweetest smile upon her guardian, who wound his arm around her waist +and playfully kissed her forehead--a liberty he would not dare to +have taken with Rose, who, thinking that of course she was not +wanted, made an effort to withdraw her hand. But Mr. Delafield's arm +was strong, and he pressed it closely to his side, at the same time +giving her a look which bade her stay, notwithstanding that Ada two +or three times hinted to her the propriety of going. + +"Why don't you ask Miss Lee about your Boston friends?" said Mr. +Delafield, when they had taken a few turns in silence. + +Ada tossed her head scornfully, and replied, "I don't think I had any +acquaintances in common with _Miss Lee_, unless, indeed, it were her +_old aunty_;" and with a little hateful laugh she leaned across Mr. +Delafield, and asked, "How is she? Richard, you would like to know." + +I was provoked at her manner, but I answered civilly that my aunt was +well, adding, as one would naturally do, "Herbert Langley, I suppose +you know, is dead." + +The news was unexpected, and coming as it did, it produced upon her a +singular effect, blanching her cheek to a marble whiteness, while her +lips quivered spasmodically. Mr. Delafield was startled, and +stopping short, demanded of her what was the matter. + +"Oh, nothing much," she answered, recovering her composure, and +pressing her hand upon her side, "nothing but an ugly pain, which is +gone now. I have felt it often lately," and her face looked as +unruffled and innocent as if she really thought it was the truth she +had uttered. + +_I_ knew she told a falsehood, but Mr. Delafield did not, and leading +her to the summer-house, which was near, bade her sit down, while he +made minute inquiries concerning the pain, asking how long since she +first felt it, and saying he would speak to Dr. Matson the first time +he came to Cedar Grove, adding that a _blister_, he presumed, would +help it! + +"Oh, mercy!" she exclaimed, again growing pale. "You make too +serious a matter of it." + +But he did not think so--he was very tender of her, as a brother +would be of his orphaned sister; and knowing that her mother had died +of consumption, he watched narrowly for the first indications of that +disease in her. Just then little Jessie came bounding down the walk, +saying that "breakfast was ready," and leading her by the hand, I +returned to the house, followed by Mr. Delafield and Ada, the latter +of whom made some remark concerning my _gait_, which she pronounced +"wholly _Yankee_ and _countrified_." + +"And graceful," rejoined Mr. Delafield, at the same time telling her +he did not like to hear one female speak disparagingly of another. + +Ada bit her lip with vexation, and when she took her seat at the +table, she was evidently not in the best of humors. At Mrs. +Lansing's invitation her brother remained to breakfast, and I could +not perceive that he was any more polite to the beautiful lady in +elegant French muslin on his right, than he was to the plain-looking +girl in a shilling calico on his left. Indeed, if there was a +difference, it was in favor of the latter, with whom he conversed the +most, addressing her as if she had at least _common sense_, while +towards Ada he always assumed the trifling, bantering manner which he +seemed to think was suited to her capacity. + +Breakfast being over, I started for my room, accidentally dropping +upon the stairs a handkerchief, which had been given me by Anna, and +which had her name "Anna Lee" marked in the corner. In honor of +Ada's return, there was no school that day, and as the morning +advanced and the heat in my chamber grew oppressive, I went with my +book to the sitting-room, and took a seat by an open window, where I +soon became so absorbed in reading as not to observe Mrs. Lansing and +Ada, who came out upon the piazza and sat down quite near me, but +still in such a position that neither of us could see the other. +After a time they were joined by Mr. Delafield, and then for a moment +I thought of stealing quietly away, but thinking my remaining there +could do no harm, I resumed my book and forgot my neighbors entirely, +until my attention was roused by the sound of my own name. + +It was Mrs. Lansing who spoke, and she asked, "What kind of folks are +those relatives of Miss Lee?" + +"Oh, about _so so_," answered Ada, and Mrs. Lansing continued, "And +she was then at school? I believe." + +"_At school!_" repeated Ada, apparently in much surprise, "Mercy, no! +Why, she was a grown-up woman, as much as twenty-two or twenty-three +years old." + +"There, I thought so," answered Mrs. Lansing, who the reader will +remember had, at my first introduction, taken me to be twenty-five. +"I thought she must be more than eighteen, didn't you, Richard?" + +"_Eighteen!_" repeated Ada. "It isn't possible she calls herself +eighteen. She dare not do it in my presence. Why, she had been a +teacher, I don't know how long, and, besides that, 'twas said that +she had once been engaged to a Dr. Clayton, who, for some reason, +jilted her, and was then a married man as much as thirty years old. +_Eighteen_, indeed. I'd like to hear her say so." + +I was confounded, but supposing she had mistaken me for Anna, my +first impulse was to go out and tell her so, but fearing lest she +should think I had intentionally listened, my second thought was to +go away where I could hear nothing further, and then, when Mrs. +Lansing questioned me, as I felt sure she would, I fancied it would +be an easy matter to exonerate myself from the falsehood Ada had put +upon me. I had reached the hall, and was half-way up the stairs, +when Mr. Delafield, who had arisen and was walking back and forth on +the piazza, espied me, and called me back. + +There was a troubled look on hie face, and fixing his piercing black +eyes upon me as if he would read my inmost thoughts, he said with +something of bitterness in the tones of his voice, "I _did_ think I +had found _one_ female who, on all occasions, spoke the truth; but if +what Ada has said is true, I am mistaken; though why _you_ (and his +hand involuntarily clutched my arm) or any other woman should stoop +to a falsehood, or seek to deny her age, be she a hundred or less, is +a secret which Heaven knows, perhaps, but I do not." + +I felt my face flush with indignation, and turning towards Ada, who, +not having expected a scene like this, was very pale, I said, "It is +not necessary, Miss Montrose, for you to repeat what you have +asserted concerning me, for I accidentally overheard it, and I thank +Mr. Delafield for giving me an opportunity to exonerate myself from +the charge you are pleased to bring against me." + +"Been listening," muttered Mrs. Lansing. + +"Silence, Angeline. Go on, Rose," interrupted Mr. Delafield, in a +voice which we both obeyed, she resuming her needlework, while I +continued, "I had taken my seat by the open window ere you and Miss +Montrose came out here, and not thinking it necessary to leave, I +remained, without, however, hearing a word of your conversation until +I caught the sound of my name. Then, indeed, my senses were +sharpened, and I heard Miss Montrose's statement, which I am sure she +would never have made were she not laboring under a mistake." + +Here Ada, who was not in the least prepared for the occasion, began +to stammer out something about "letting the matter drop--she did not +wish to harm me, and had said what she did inadvertently, without +ever dreaming of making trouble. She didn't see why Richard wished +to make it such a serious matter, for she was sure _she_ didn't care +whether I were _forty_ or _eighteen_." + +"But _I_ care," he said, grasping my arm still tighter, "_I_ care to +have justice done. I have supposed Miss Lee to be frank, ingenuous +and truthful, and if what you assert is true, she is the reverse, and +should suffer accordingly, while on the contrary if she be innocent, +she shall have an opportunity of proving herself so." + +By this time Ada had collected her scattered senses, and resolving to +brave the storm she had raised, replied, "Certainly, Miss Lee has a +right to clear herself if she can, and prove that she _is_ really +_Rose_ instead of _Anna_ Lee." + +"_Rose_ instead of _Anna_! What do you mean?" thundered Mr. +Delafield, while _I_ was too much astonished to speak. + +Ada was not very _deep_, and in all her plotting she had never +thought how easy it would be for me to prove the falsity of her +assertion by writing home; so with the utmost coolness she replied, +"I mean this:--there were two _Lee_ girls living at the house of +their uncle where I occasionally visited: one was _Anna_, a young +lady of twenty-two or twenty-three, the other was _Rose_, a +schoolgirl of fourteen or fifteen. The oldest of these two I have +every reason to believe stands before us--at least _this_, which I +found upon the stairs, would indicate as much," and she held to view +the handkerchief which I had dropped and had not missed. + +Glancing at the name, Mrs. Lansing said, "I have observed a similar +mark upon several of her garments, and rather wondered at it." + +This was true, for Anna had dealt generously with me, giving me many +of her clothes, some of which bore her full name, while others had +merely the initials. I was about to tell of this, when Mr. Delafield +prevented me by asking if I could prove that I was what I represented +myself to be, and that I was a mere schoolgirl when I saw Miss +Montrose in Boston. + +"Yes, sir, I can," I answered firmly; "by writing home, I can prove +it, if in no other way. But Miss Montrose knows better than to +confound me with _Anna_, whom she surely has reason for remembering." + +Fearful lest her darling secret was about to be divulged, Ada roused +up and in a tone of angry defiance, answered, "Yes, I have reason for +remembering you, for you did me good service by taking off my hands a +worthless, drunken fellow, about whom the Bostonians were annoying +me. I thank you for it, Miss Lee, and only wonder how you could +suppose I would forget you. I recognized you the moment we met at +the table, but I did not then dream of your calling yourself +_eighteen_ when you are certainly _twenty-six_!" + +I was confounded and remained speechless, while with renewed strength +my accuser continued, "Perhaps you will deny having been a teacher at +that time, when according to your statement you were only fourteen." + +"No," I answered, "I do not deny that; I _had_ taught, but I was only +_thirteen_ when I did so, as any one at home will testify." + +"Thirteen! how improbable!" exclaimed Mrs. Lansing, while Ada +continued, "And what of your engagement with Dr. Clayton. I heard it +from the lips of your aunt; but perhaps she told me a falsehood?" and +she looked maliciously at me, while with a stamp of his foot Mr. +Delafield said sternly, "Ada, you have no right to question her of +that." + +"But I am glad she did," I said, "for as I live, I have never been +engaged to any man." + +"Nor in love with one either? Will you say you were never in love +with Dr. Clayton?" persisted Ada. + +It was a cruel question, but I could not deny it, and I remained +silent, while I cowered beneath the burning gaze of Mr. Delafield, +who still held me fast, but who now loosened his hold, and slightly +pushing me from him, leaned against the pillar, with folded arms, and +dark, lowering brow, while Mrs. Lansing and Ada exchanged glances of +triumph. They had by my silence gained a partial advantage over me, +but as long as I felt the clasp of Mr. Delafield's hand, I was strong +to defy them. Now, however, that had failed me, and girllike I began +to cry, telling them "they could easily test the whole matter by +writing either to Boston or Meadow Brook." + +This alternative had not occurred to Ada before, but now she readily +saw how easily I could prove my innocence, and as she met Mr. +Delafield's inquiring glance, she turned very pale and laid her hand +upon her side as if the pain had returned. + +"Rose," said Mr. Delafield, "you would hardly wish for me to write to +Meadow Brook were you guilty, and as you seem willing that we should +do so, I am inclined to hope that Ada may be mistaken. Come, stand +by me (and reaching out his hand he drew me to his side) and tell me +all the particulars of your acquaintance with Miss Montrose, and also +about that sister with whom you are confounded, and you (turning to +the other ladies) are not to speak, until she is through, when Ada +can make any correction or explanation necessary." + +It was an act of justice which I owed to myself, I knew, and wiping +my eyes, I was about to commence, when Ada, rising up, said +mockingly, "With the Honorable Judge's permission I will leave, as I +do not wish to hear the falsehoods which I am sure will be uttered." + +Again Mr. Delafield's long arm was extended, and catching Ada, as she +was passing, he drew her to his side, where he held her firmly, +saying, "It looks suspicious, Ada, that you are not willing to hear +Miss Lee's defense. You have, either by mistake or design (the +former, I hope), preferred against her serious charges, and you must +listen to her explanation. Commence," he added, looking down upon +me, and in a firm, unfaltering manner I told both my story and that +of Anna, who, I said, had eloped with Herbert Langley and was now a +broken-hearted widow, living with his mother in Boston. + +At this part of my narrative Ada's hand was pressed convulsively on +her side, while with parted lips and pale cheeks she leaned forward, +looking at me anxiously; but when she saw that I did not speak of her +ever having been engaged to Herbert, the color came back to her face, +and with a sigh of relief she listened more composedly, nodding +assent when I referred her to our meeting at the dépôt at +Canandaigua, and faintly admitting that "she might have been +mistaken. I looked so much like Anna that 'twas not impossible." + +This I knew was false, but I did not contradict her, and proceeded +with my story, until suddenly recollecting the incident at the +theater, I turned to Mr. Delafield and asked "if he remembered it?" + +He thought a moment, and then the arm, which had gradually been +winding itself about my waist, clasped me to his side, while he +exclaimed, "Remember it? Perfectly, and _you_ are that little girl. +They called you Rose;--and this is why your face has puzzled me so +much. I see it all now. You _are_ innocent, thank Heaven," and the +hand, which, heretofore, had held Ada fast, now rested caressingly +upon my head and parted back my curls, as he said, more to himself +than to me, "and you have remembered me all this time." Then, +turning towards Ada, he said sternly, "We will hear you now." + +Ada was caught in her own snare. She had thought to prevent me from +doing her injury by branding me as a _liar_, and now that I was +proved innocent, it filled her with confusion, and she remained +silent until Mrs. Lansing came to her aid by saying, "I do not think +Ada meant to do wrong; she probably mistook Rose for her sister, +hence the blunder." + +This gave Ada courage, and crossing over to me, she took my hand, +begging my forgiveness and saying "she _had_ been mistaken--she +certainly did not mean to do me so great a wrong, and she hoped I +would forget it and try to look upon her as my friend, for such she +would henceforth be." + +I was not quite verdant enough to credit _all_ that Ada said; but I +replied I was willing to forgive her, and when she asked permission +to _kiss_ me, so that the reconciliation might be perfect, I offered +no resistance, though I did not return the compliment, for which I +think Mr. Delafield felt gratified--at least I read as much in his +face. During the progress of my story Ada had alternately turned red +and white, particularly at the points where I touched upon Herbert. +This did not escape the observation of Mr. Delafield, and suspecting +more than Ada thought he did, he half seriously, half playfully asked +her "why she had evinced so much feeling whenever Mr. Langley's name +was mentioned." + +Instantly the color left her face, which wore a livid hue, and her +hand went up to her side as if the cause of her agitation were there, +while with a half stifled moan, she said, "Oh, oh!--the pain!" + +Of course Mrs. Lansing asked what she meant, and Ada, in answering +her, managed to dwell so long upon "the horrid pain, which she feared +would become chronic," that Mr. Delafield could not reasonably expect +an answer to his question. Still, I think, he was not satisfied, and +when I saw the mischievous look in his eye, as he told her "she must +_certainly_ be _blistered_," I fancied that he, too, understood her +as I did. + +That afternoon we were again assembled upon the piazza, Mrs. Lansing, +Ada, and myself, the former nodding in her large willow chair, while +the latter sat upon a little stool at my feet, and with her elbow +upon my lap was looking up into my face with the childish simplicity +she knew so well how to assume. She was just asking me to assure her +again of my forgiveness when Mr. Delafield joined us, and coming up +behind me leaned over my chair, while he handed to Ada a little +oblong package, saying, "I was in the village just after dinner, and +seeing the Dr. I asked him about _your pain_. As I expected, he +prescribed a _blister_, and at my request he prepared one, which you +are to apply at night when you go to bed!" + +I could not see him, but I absolutely pitied poor Ada, who began to +realize that the way of the transgressor is hard. The tears started +to her eyes, while with a look of dismay, she exclaimed, "Oh, +Richard, how could you? I never was blistered in my life. It will +kill me. I can't do it,"--and she cried aloud. + +Very gently, Mr. Delafield soothed her, telling her that so far from +"killing her," it would certainly "cure her," he knew it would, and +he insisted upon her trying it. At last, as an idea, perfectly +natural, under the circumstances, dawned upon her mind, she looked up +very submissively at him and said, "To please you, I'll try it; +though the remedy, I think, is worse than the disease." + +I hardly know whether he had any faith in her words--_I_ certainly +had not, and when next morning she came down to breakfast in a loose +wrapper, with a very languid look, I could not bring myself to ask +her concerning the _blister_, which the livelong night had drawn +nicely--on the back of the _fireboard_, in her room! As I expected, +Mr. Delafield soon made his appearance, and after inquiring how his +prescription worked, and if it had pained her much, he said, looking +towards neither of us, "How would you like to ride on horseback with +me out to Mr. Parker's plantation? I have business there, and do not +wish to go alone." + +"Oh, charming!" exclaimed Ada, jumping up and clapping her hands in a +manner but little suited to a blistered side; "that will be grand, +and I can wear my new riding-dress, which fits so nicely." + +"Why, Ada, what do you mean?" said Mr. Delafield, with great gravity. +"My invitation was intended for _Miss Lee_. _You_ can't, of course, +think of riding on horseback with a _blister_. You must have +forgotten it!" and his keen eyes rested upon her face with a deeper +meaning than she could fathom. + +She turned very red, and for an instant, I think, half resolved to +acknowledge the deception she was practising. But Richard Delafield +was one who despised a falsehood, and she dared not confess to him +her error, so she turned away, saying with a feigned indifference +which illy accorded with the expression of her face, "Surely I forgot +all about it." + +Alone in her room, however, she shed tears of anger and mortification +as she saw us ride off together, and thought of the happiness from +which she was debarred by a fancied blister, which had never come in +contact with her flesh. But whether it drew upon her side or the +fireboard, it in a measure wrought the desired cure, for seldom again +did Ada attempt to deceive her guardian. Would it not be well if +more of our modern young ladies should be blistered for the same +disease that afflicted Ada Montrose? + + ------------ + +It was nearly dark when we returned, and Mrs. Lansing and Ada were in +their accustomed places upon the piazza, the latter holding an open +letter which she had that afternoon received from her cousin Mrs. +Johnson, who was spending some time in Mobile, and who wished Ada to +join her there, before going on to New Orleans. They were evidently +discussing the matter, and when we came up, Ada handed the letter to +Mr. Delafield, bidding him read it and tell her what to do. Hastily +running it over, he said, "Go, by all means: you have never seen +Mobile, and it will be a good opportunity. + +"But I have been thinking of giving up my visit to New Orleans," she +continued in a kind of beseeching tone; "Mrs. Lansing had rather I'd +remain with her this winter." + +It was not so dark as to prevent me from seeing the expression of Mr. +Delafield's face, and I fancied the proposition did not altogether +please him. She evidently thought so too, for rather pettishly she +added, "but if you wish to be rid of me, of course I'll go." + +"Ada! How foolish!" he said, sternly. "I've often heard you express +a desire to spend a winter in New Orleans, and now that an +opportunity is presented, I think you had better accept it. I shall +be there a part of the time, perhaps all," he added; and then _I_ +turned away lest _my_ face should betray what was passing within. + +"And will you go with me to Mobile?" Ada asked of him, as a child +would ask her father. + +"Certainly," he answered; "I do not propose letting you go alone. +But how is that side? I'd almost forgotten to ask." + +"It has pained me a good deal," said she, "but Martha dressed it +nicely this afternoon, and it feels much better. I'm so glad you +made me apply it, now the worst is over, for I believe it will do me +good!" + +She spoke with every appearance of candor, and much as it surprised +him, Mr. Delafield was, I thought, partially, if not wholly, +convinced that what she said was true, and that he had suspected her +of more than she deserved; for his manner towards her changed, and as +if trying to make amends, he devoted himself to her entirely for the +remainder of the evening, telling her where they would go when they +were in New Orleans, and laying many plans for her pleasure. Once in +his zeal he thoughtlessly threw his arm around her waist, but she +instantly shrank back, saying, "don't--don't--you hurt!" + +This convinced him thoroughly, and I slept and woke twice that night +ere the sound of their voices ceased upon the piazza, where their +long interview was kept in countenance by Mrs. Lansing, who sat up +until he left, and then patting Ada's cheek, told her she thought +"her prospects were brightening." + +I thought so, too, and there was a shadow on my heart, when I saw how +much they were together during the few weeks which elapsed before her +departure for Mobile. It is true he was still kind to me as of old; +and whenever he found that Ada, by word or look, had slighted me, he +always managed to let her know how much he disapproved her conduct, +so that in his presence she was usually polite, though she could not +quite conceal the fact that I was to her an object of dislike. + +It was nearly the middle of October, when Ada finally left us for +Mobile, accompanied by Mr. Delafield, who, in bidding us good-by, +said we need not be surprised if he did not return in several weeks. +I consider it to be my misfortune that my face generally betrays all +I feel, and with his physiognomic powers he could not fail to see the +effect which his words produced upon me, for well I knew how lonely +Cedar Grove would be without him; and when after he was gone, little +Jessie climbed into my lap, and laying her head upon my shoulder +wished "Uncle Dick never would go away," I mentally responded to the +wish. The whole household seemed more or less affected; Mrs. Lansing +was cross; Lina careless; Halbert fretful; and Jessie unhappy--while +I began to be haunted with my old project of returning home; and I +should, perhaps, have proposed it to Mrs. Lansing, had it not been +that, at the close of the fifth day, we were greatly surprised at Mr. +Delafield's unexpected return. He didn't like Mobile, he said, and +would much rather be at home. + +Numerous were the questions asked by Mrs. Lansing concerning Ada and +the pain in her side, which last, Mr. Delafield said, had left her +entirely, owing, he believed, to the timely application of the +blister. He was deceived, I thought, and I must confess to a slight +feeling of gratification at an occurrence which thoroughly convinced +him of his mistake. One night a few days after his return, old +Hagar, his head cook, came over to Cedar Grove, groaning with +rheumatism, which she termed "a misery in her back." Lina, to whom +her complaints were made, listened a while, and then opening an old +paper-box which stood under the table, drew forth a _plaster_, which +she said she "had done found in Miss Ada's room, on t'other side the +fireboard, oncet when she was clarin' the fireplace." + +As Ada was gone she thought there was no harm in. appropriating it +to herself, which she accordingly did, laying it carefully away until +it should be needed. The recital of Hagar's aches and pains reminded +her of it, so she urged it upon the old negress, assuring her it must +be good, or white folks would never use it! With many thanks Hagar +hobbled home, applied her plaster, and went to bed! But, alas! for +the expected relief, which came only in burning sensations and +stinging pains, eliciting many a groan from the poor old lady, who +heroically bore it until morning, when she found herself unable to +perform her accustomed duties. + +For a long time Mr. Delafield waited for his breakfast, which was at +last served up by Hagar's daughter, who gave such a deplorable +account of her mother's condition that the moment breakfast was over +he went himself to the cabin, where he found the old lady moaning +over her blistered back, which she said, "was a heap harder to bar +than the rheumatics." + +A few words explained the whole, for Hagar never concealed aught from +her master, and so she gave the history of her _plaster_, which now +lay upon the hearth in the ashes, where she had thrown it. Quick as +thought the truth burst upon Mr. Delafield, who laughed so long and +loud, that Aunt Hagar, thinking that he was making light of her +misfortunes, began to cry, saying she "never thought Mars'r Richard +would poke fun at her misery." + +"Neither am I making fun of you," said he, adding further, by way of +atoning for his error, that for the remainder of the week she should +be freed from all household service, and devote her whole time, if +she liked, to her aching back. + +This had the effect of restoring Aunt Hagar to good humor, and in the +midst of her thanks, Mr. Delafield returned slowly to the house, +thinking that when a habit of deception is once firmly fixed, it +requires more to cure it than a blister applied to the fireboard! + + + + +CHAPTER XXIII. + +DR. CLAYTON. + +Rapidly, and to me very happily, did the winter pass away, for it was +enlivened by the presence of Mr. Delafield, who was with us so often, +that it became at last a serious debate among the blacks as to +whether Cedar Grove or Sunny Bank were really his home. More than +once, too, was it whispered in the village, that little _Rosa Lee_, +plain and unassuming as she was, had stirred in the heart of the +"stern old bachelor" a far deeper feeling than Ada Montrose had ever +been capable of awakening. And sometimes she, foolish child that she +was, thought so too, not from anything he said, neither from anything +which he did; indeed, it would have been hard for her to tell why her +heart sometimes beat so fast when he was near, for though his manner +was always kind and considerate, he never spoke to her of love--never +appeared as he had once done in the summer-house, when she gave him +such silly answers! + +And still, occasionally, Rosa dared to hope that her love was +returned, else why did each day find him at her side where he +lingered so long, saying to her but little, but watching her +movements, and listening to her words, as he would not have done had +she been to him an object of indifference. Not naturally quick to +read human nature, Mrs. Lansing was wholly deceived by her brother's +cold exterior, and never dreaming how in secret he worshiped the +humble girl she called her governess, she left them much together. +Why then, did he never speak to her of the passion which had become a +part of his being? Simply because he, too, was deceived. Once, +indeed, he had essayed to tell her of his love, and dreading lest his +affection should not be returned, he was the more ready to construe +her evasive replies into a belief that it was indeed as he feared. +Then, too, her shy, reserved manner, while it made him prize her all +the more, disheartened him; for not thus was he accustomed to being +treated, and with that jealousy which seems to be the twin sister of +love, he ofttimes thought he read aversion and distrust, when there +was, on Rosa's part, naught save a fear lest he should discover her +secret, and despise her for it. Added to this was the remembrance of +what Ada had said concerning her former engagement with Dr. Clayton. +True, Rosa had denied the engagement, but when charged with having +loved him she had remained silent; thus proving the story correct. +And if she loved him when a child, was it not probable that she loved +him still, married man though he was. He had heard of such things, +or, at least, he had read of them in books, and for many days Mr. +Delafield's brow was literally tied up in knots, while he tried to +solve the question as to "whether, having loved once and been +deceived, Rosa Lee could love again." + +At last he decided that possibly she could, and his mind was fully +made up to talk with her upon the subject, when an unexpected arrival +blasted his hopes at once, and darkened the glimmering sunlight which +was dawning upon his horizon. It was a dark, rainy night, toward the +last of April, that I sat with the family in the pleasant little +sitting-room. As usual, Mr. Delafield was with us, and this evening +he was reading aloud from Longfellow's wonderful poem. He was just +in the midst of Hiawatha's wooing, and I fancied there was in the +tones of his voice a softer cadence as he read, + + "Hand in hand they went together, + Through the woodland and the meadow, + Left the old man standing lonely + At the doorway of his wigwam, + Heard the falls of Minnehaha + Calling to them from the distance, + Crying to them from afar off, + Fare thee well, oh, Laughing Water." + + +Scarcely had the last words left his lips when a heavy tread upon the +piazza and a loud ringing of the bell startled us, for it was not +often that we were favored with visitors on such a night as this. +Zillah, the colored girl, hastened to the door where she found a +stranger, who, stepping into the hall, asked, "if Miss Rosa Lee lived +there." + +Starting from my chair, I turned very white, for I recognized the +voice of _Dr. Clayton_, who the next moment stood before me! I +forgot the past--forgot that he had been my lover--forgot that +Richard Delafield's eyes were upon me--forgot everything except that +he had come from dear New England--had breathed the air of my native +hills--had heard the sound of my mother's voice--and had brought me +undoubtedly tidings of that mother's welfare. Springing forward with +a cry of joy I took his extended hand, nor shrank away when, with +unwonted tenderness he stooped to kiss my lips, low whispering as he +did so, "_Dear Rosa_." + +Then, indeed, I blushed, for I knew he had no right to call me thus, +but the next moment it was forgotten, and with something of pride in +my manner, I presented him to Mrs. Lansing and Mr. Delafield, the +latter of whom greeted him rather coldly, and after a few words of +common courtesy, bade us good night, but not until he had learned +what, until that moment, was news to me, viz. that Dell Clayton had +been dead nearly six months! As he passed me on his way out, he +said, so low that no one else could hear him, "Fare thee well, oh, +Laughing Water," referring to the line he had last read. There was a +deep scowl upon his dark face, and as I gazed upon him, I could not +help wondering if it were thus the old man looked, when from his +lonely wigwam door he watched the departing footsteps of his daughter. + +"Come again to-morrow, Uncle Dick," said little Jessie, following him +into the hall; but he made her no answer, save his accustomed good-by +kiss, and I soon heard his heavy tread as he strode down the winding +walk and out into the open field, muttering to himself, as I +afterwards learned: + + "And she will follow where he leads her, + Leaving all things for the stranger." + + +Yes, Mr. Delafield was jealous--terribly jealous of Dr. Clayton, the +nature of whose business he readily divined, though I did not, and +nothing was further from my mind than the thought that he intended +honoring me with a chance of becoming Mrs. Clayton 2d. And yet it +was this alone which had brought him to Georgia, he taking the +precaution to send on in advance a letter, in which he had made known +his wishes, and asked for a return of the affection which, for five +long years, he said, had never known one moment of abatement, even +though another had slept upon his bosom as his wife. But she was +gone, and in her place, he would see blooming, he said, the _Rose_ he +had loved so long. Owing to some detention, this letter had failed +to reach me, hence I was wholly unprepared for the scene which +followed when, at last, we were left alone. Well skilled in the +_signs_, Mrs. Lansing had purposely retired, not long after her +brother's departure, while I, suspecting nothing, made no objection +when Dr. Clayton took his seat upon the sofa at my side. I was +talking to him of Anna, and from speaking of her, and poor Herbert's +death, it was an easy transition to Dell, of whom he spoke kindly, +nay, even affectionately, as he told me of her last days; how much +she suffered, and how gentle she became, never chiding him, in the +least, for a thing unskilfully done, but seeming satisfied with +everything, and loving him at last with a love which, had it been +earlier born, would have shed happiness over his comparatively +cheerless life. Then he told me of the little child, not yet three +years old, whom he had called "Rosa Lee," and gently pushing back my +curls, and gazing down into my face, he said, "It is a fancy of mine, +perhaps, but I love to think she looks like you, who should have been +her mother." + +With all my stupidity, I understood him then, and blushing crimson, I +moved away to the end of the sofa, while he continued, "What did you +think of my letter? You received it, I suppose?" + +I had received no letter, and so I said; whereupon he proceeded to +tell me its contents, a part of which the reader already knows. +Utterly confounded and powerless to move, I sat motionless, while, +with his arm around me, he went over with the past, recalling to my +mind, with a vividness which made it seem real again, the time when +first he had found me weeping in the somber old schoolroom, away to +the northward; the night when, with the soft moonbeams falling around +us, we sat together beneath the tall oak tree, while I laid before +him my childish griefs; and, lastly, the many pleasant hours we had +whiled away together, listening to the sound of the running brook, +which ran past the twining grape-vine, whose broad leaves had rustled +above our heads. + +"On these occasions, Rose," said he, "did nothing ever tell you how +much you were beloved?" + +"Yes," I answered bitterly, my woman's nature rousing up as I +remembered the times to which he referred. "Yes, and what did it +avail me, even though I was beloved? Ambition proved the stronger +attraction of the two, and you wedded another. You, who, now that +other has gone would talk again to me of love; but Rosa Lee is no +longer a child to be deceived, and you mistake her strangely, if you +fancy you can cast her off and take her up again at will." + +Here, overcome with emotion, I burst into tears. My words and manner +misled him, for in them he saw only resentment for his former +treatment; and this inspired him with hope that the feeling I once +cherished for him could again be nourished into life. Very tenderly, +then, he talked to me, and, as I listened, a numbness crept over my +heart, for I knew he was in earnest now, and I felt that it was not +the Dr. Clayton of old--the fickle, selfish man of the world--with +whom I had to deal, but Dr. Clayton purified, and made better by the +trials through which he had passed--a noble, true-hearted, and +upright man--who now laid at my feet the love which I knew had always +been mine. Very earnestly he implored forgiveness for the wrong he +once had done me, saying that for it he had been terribly punished, +inasmuch as he had suffered far more than I. And still he breathed +no word of censure against his erring wife, who, he said, was perhaps +more sinned against than sinning, and who, when the last great agony +was upon her, had whispered in his ear, as her white, clammy hand +rested on the flowing curls of little Rose, "Her mother, I know, will +be she whose name she bears, and I am willing it should be so." + +"And was she not right?" he continued, drawing me closer to his side. +"Will you not be the angel of my home, the mother of my child?" + +And then again he told me how much I had been loved; how he had +striven in vain to cast me from his heart, when it was madness and +sin to keep me there; and how, when his horizon had been darkest with +want and care, there was still in the distance a ray of sunlight, the +remembrance of me, which had kept his soul from fainting. And now +that it was right for him to speak to me of love, would I not listen +and give him an opportunity to atone for the wrong he had once done +me? He paused for my reply. There was silence in the room, and I +counted each pulse of my beating heart as it throbbed with the +intensity of my excitement. + +"Will not my darling answer me?" he said, and I felt his breath upon +my cheek, his lips upon my brow. + +Not thus could I sit and tell him what duty bade me say. So I moved +away, and standing up before him, I said, slowly, and distinctly, +"Dr. Clayton, I loved you once, but the time has gone by, the love +has died out, and I would not awaken it if I could." + +There was a firmness in my manner, a decision in the tones of my +voice, which startled him more than what I said, and with a faint cry +he too arose, and coming to my side, said, "God forgive you, Rose, +for the cruel words you have uttered, but you cannot be in earnest." + +And then, with the firelight flickering over his pale face, he plead +with me "to think again, to revoke what I had said, and not to send +him away utterly hopeless and wretched. The love I had felt for him +once, though chilled and dormant now, _would bloom_ again, for _he_ +could bring it back to life, and I must be his; he could not live +without me. I need not decide then, that night," he said, "he would +give me time," and again he pressed for my answer, which was the same +as before; for, much as I pitied him, there was between as a _dark +shadow_, and the substance of that shadow bore the form and features +of _Richard Delafield_! + +Sinking into a chair, he laid his head upon the table, while, burying +my face in the cushions of the sofa, I wept bitterly, stealing +occasional glances towards the bowed form which, in its despair, gave +no sign of life. There was no acting there, for it was the grief of +a strong man which I saw. Without, the storm had ceased; the wind +had died away, and the rain no longer beat against the casement; but +within, there raged a wilder storm of human passions, and as it swept +over me in its full force, I cried, mentally, "Ought I thus to deal +with him? I loved him once, perhaps I could do so again. I would at +least try." And, rising up, I glided noiselessly to his side. He +did not hear me, and, for a time, I stood gazing down upon him, while +I thought of all he had suffered, and of his love for me, which I +could not doubt. The shadow no longer stood between us; it was gone, +and, strengthened by its absence, I laid my hand upon his shoulder. +He shuddered as if it had been a serpent's touch, but when I +whispered in his ear, "Look up, I have something to tell you," he +raised his head, disclosing to my view a face over which years seemed +to have passed since last I had looked upon it. + +"I will try," I said, "but give me one day for reflection, and +to-morrow night you shall have your answer." + +As the clouds are dispersed by the soft rays of the sun, so the +shadows passed from his brow at my words, and clasping me in his arms +he wept over me, as Heaven grant I may never see man weep again. + +The fire on the hearth had long since gone out. The lamp was burning +dimly, and the moonbeams came faintly in through an eastern window +ere I bade him good night, and sought the solitude of my room, where +my resolution almost instantly gave way, for the _shadow_ was there, +and in its presence I felt I would rather die than wed a man I did +not love. + +"Oh, for a female friend with whom to counsel in my need," I said, as +I nervously paced the room. + +I thought of Mrs. Lansing. She was a woman--she had been kind to me +of late, and after a few moments' reflection I determined to ask her +advice. This being settled, I fell into a disturbed sleep, from +which I did not wake until the bell was ringing for breakfast. I met +him at the table, and my heart beat fast when I saw how anxiously he +scanned my haggard face. + +"You are sick this morning," he said, when at last we were alone. + +Taking my hand he felt my quickened pulse, and continued, "This must +not be. Calm yourself down, for I would not wish you to answer me +under all this excitement." + +Soon after this he left me, going down to the hotel where he had +first stopped on his arrival at W----. As soon as he was gone I +sought an interview with Mrs. Lansing, to whom I confided the whole +story of my former love for Dr. Clayton, and of my feelings now, +asking her to tell me as a friend what I should do. I did not dare +look her in the face while I was talking, and when I had finished I +waited with downcast eyes for her answer, which was characteristic of +a woman who had never known what love was, save as she felt it for +her children. + +"Do! Why, marry him of course. I should not hesitate a moment, for +'tis not every girl in your circumstances who has an offer like that. +He seems to be a perfect gentleman,--is certainly very fine +looking--is refined, polished, highly educated, and has a good +profession. What more can you desire?" + +"_Love_ for him," I replied; and she continued, "Pshaw! That will +come soon enough, depend upon it. There are many happy marriages +where one of the parties had at first no particular affection for the +other, as I myself can testify. I _respected_ Mr. Lansing, when I +married him, but I did not _love_ him, and our union was, I am +confident, far happier than three-fourths of those where love is the +ruling motive, for in nine cases out of ten they grow sick of each +other as faults and peculiarities are brought to light, of whose +existence they had never dreamed. Take your own case for an example. +Suppose you had married Dr. Clayton when you fancied him so much, you +would undoubtedly have been disgusted with him by this time, whereas, +now that you know he is fallible, you can safely link your destiny +with his, feeling sure that in good time the love you once had for +him will return." + +I knew there was some truth in this argument, but it failed to +convince me, and I remained silent until Mrs. Lansing startled me +with, "You do not of course love another?" + +I was taken by surprise, and without a thought of the result, I +answered "I do." + +"And that other?" she continued, fixing her eyes upon me. + +I know not what possessed me, but a power I could not resist impelled +me to answer, "Is your brother." + +She did not send me from her presence with scorn and loathing as I +thought she would. Nay, she did not even speak, but for a time stood +mute with astonishment. As I now recall that scene, I understand her +better, and I know that the truth, just as it was, dawned upon her +mind, and suggested the falsehood which she uttered. + +Coming closely to me, she said, "I cannot see why it is that all my +governesses have fallen in love with my brother, yet such is the +case. I _did_ think, Miss Lee, that you were an exception, but I +find I am mistaken, which surprises me greatly, inasmuch as he has +never paid you the slightest attention, and even if he had, I do not +understand how you could think him in earnest. For years the world +has looked upon his union with Ada as sure, and though for certain +reasons I have sometimes opposed it, I am anxious for it now, and it +is well that I am, for I suppose it is a settled thing." + +I held my breath for fear I should lose a single word of what she +should say next. Perhaps she was unused to falsehoods. Be that as +it may, her voice trembled slightly and she spoke hurriedly as she +said, "They are engaged, and have been ever since she went to Mobile, +and they will probably be married next autumn; hence, you see that +the love you have presumed to feel for him would be useless, even +were you his equal." + +She started to leave me, but turned back while she said, "I trust +that what I have told you will be kept a secret, for Richard does not +wish to have the matter discussed." + +I nodded assent, and the next moment I was alone with my sorrow, +which was far easier to bear now that uncertainty was made sure. So +long as there remained a lingering hope that my love for Mr. +Delafield might possibly be reciprocated, I shrunk in horror from +marrying another. But now that hope was swept away, for I never +thought of doubting Mrs. Lansing's word, and a kind of torpor crept +over me, suspending for a time both my judgment and my will. + +"I will marry Dr. Clayton," I said, and with that decision came a +feeling of gratified pride as I thought I should thus prove to +Richard how little I cared for him! + +Ah, I knew not then that the heart I coveted enshrined no image save +that of "Rosa Lee," for whom Richard Delafield would almost have lain +down his life, so great was the love he bore her. He had readily +divined the object of the stranger's visit, and the thought that it +might be successful was terrible. All the night long he, too, had +been sleepless, pacing the length and breadth of his spacious halls +and murmuring occasionally as, peering out into the darkness, he saw +the glimmering light from the windows of Cedar Grove, "Oh, Rose, +Rose, how can I give you up!" + +Perhaps I am superstitious, but I cannot help fancying that as often +as these words rang out on the midnight air, the _shadow_ was over +and around me. But alas! it faded and I was left to do the rash act +I meditated. With the coming of morn, Mr. Delafield grew calm, for +he had resolved upon an interview with Rosa Lee, who, if it were not +too late, should know how much he loved her, and perhaps, (his heart +thrilled with joy as he thought it), perhaps she might yet be won +from that fancy of her childhood. But first he would if possible, +learn from his sister how far matters had progressed. He had seldom +imparted to her his secrets, but he would speak to her now, for he +could not keep silent. + +She was seated at her work in her own room, when he entered, and with +a feeling of alarm at his pale, haggard face, she started up, asking +if he were ill. Motioning her aside, he said, abruptly, "It's of no +use, Angeline, to deceive you longer. I love Rosa Lee, and if it +were not for this accursed doctor, I should tell her so at once. Do +you know aught of his intentions? Has he come to seek her for his +wife?" + +Mrs. Lansing had now a double-part to perform. The falsehood she had +told to Rosa made it necessary that she should tell another to her +brother, which she did more readily, for her proud nature revolted at +the thoughts of receiving her governess as her sister-in-law. So, +thinking any means excusable which would prevent so disgraceful a +catastrophe, she answered with well feigned surprise, "I am +astonished at you, brother--astonished that a Delafield should stoop +so low as to think of wedding a girl like Rosa Lee. You cannot, I +think, be in earnest; but if you are, I am rejoiced that I have it in +my power to tell you there is no hope. I have just left Miss Lee, +who has made me her confident, asking if I thought it would be +contrary to all rules of propriety for her to marry Dr. Clayton so +soon after the death of his wife. It seems he has always preferred +her, and could you have heard her tell how much she loved him, I am +sure you would have no hope of winning her, even were she your equal." + +The wicked woman paused, trembling at her own wickedness; while her +brother, burying his face in his hands, groaned aloud. It was an +hour of bitter trial, for Rosa Lee alone had touched his heart, and +could he give her up just as he had found out how dear she was to +him? For a time the selfish nature of the man prevailed, and then +there came a moment of calmer reflection: if Rose loved another, +would it be right for him to mar her happiness by intruding upon her +his affection? Should he not rather rejoice in knowing that she was +happy with the man she had chosen, and if, henceforth, the world to +him was dark and cheerless, might he not occasionally gather a gleam +of comfort from knowing that no shadow was across her pathway! Thus +he reasoned, and when his sister ventured at last to say, "You will +not be foolish enough to talk with her," he answered, "No--no--of +course not;" then, with no visible sign of the fierce storm which had +swept over him, save the extreme pallor of his face, he arose, and +with a firm tread went back to his home, unconscious of the tear-wet +eyes which followed his retreating footsteps, as from her window Rosa +Lee watched him with a despairing heart and benumbed faculties. + +Not again that day was Cedar Grove gladdened by his presence, and +when next morning he came as was his wont, I was the betrothed of Dr. +Clayton, who, with joy beaming in every look, sat by my side, talking +to me of the pleasure we should experience in our projected European +tour, for we were to visit the Old World, and he wished our marriage +to be consummated at once, so we could sail the last of June. In a +measure I had dealt candidly with him, frankly acknowledging that the +love I had felt for him in childhood was gone, but saying, as was +true, that I respected him--yes, _liked_ him, and if he was satisfied +with that, I would be unto him a faithful wife, hoping that the +affection of former years might ere long awake again in my heart. +And he was content to take me thus, blessing me for the utterance of +words which had made him so happy. + +Involuntarily I shrank from him, for I knew I was undeserving of such +devotion, and my conscience smote me for withholding from him the +knowledge of my love for Richard Delafield. But that was a secret I +could not reveal, so I kept it to myself, and with a kind of +apathetic indifference listened while he depicted in glowing colors +the joyous future which he saw before him when I should be indeed his +_wife_. He was going to New Orleans on business, which would detain +him for three or four weeks, and on his return he asked that the +ceremony might be performed, and I go with him to Meadow Brook as his +bride. + +"No, not so soon," I exclaimed. "Leave me my freedom a little +longer;" but he only smiled as he waved aside every objection and won +from me a promise that if Mrs. Lansing were willing, we would be +married there as soon as he should return from New Orleans, whither +he would start the next night. + +Either by design or accident, Mrs. Lansing herself at that moment +entered the room, apologizing for the intrusion by saying she wanted +a book which lay upon the piano. Having secured the volume, she was +about leaving, when, glancing at the doctor she playfully remarked +upon the happy expression of his face, saying, she should judge his +suit was progressing, and adding that he had her good wishes for his +success. Emboldened by her familiarity, Dr. Clayton at once +preferred to her his wish that we might be made one under the shadow +of her roof; we would make no trouble, he said, as we wished for no +display, simply a quiet ceremony at which no one should be present +save herself, her children, and her _brother_! + +At the mention of _him_ I started as if smitten by a heavy blow, for +I thought, "I cannot in _his_ presence give myself to another;" and I +used all the arguments of which I was mistress to induce Dr. Clayton +to defer our marriage until we reached Meadow Brook. But to this +neither he nor Mrs. Lansing would listen. Glad that I was thus out +of her way, the latter seemed unusually kind, offering to give me a +bridal party as a "testimony of her respect." Thus was I silenced, +while they arranged the matter as they pleased, it being finally +decided that the wedding was to take place immediately after the +doctor's return, as he had first proposed. So overcome and +bewildered was I with the exciting scenes through which I had passed, +that, strange as it may seem, I slept soundly that night, dreaming +towards daybreak that I stood on the deck of a noble vessel, gazing +upon a most glorious sunset, which, however, had less charms for me +than did the man at my side, whom I called my husband, and whom I +loved again as I had done long ago, when with my face buried in the +grass beneath the old grapevine I had wept over his inconstancy. + +With the remembrance of that dream still haunting me, it was quite +natural that I should in the morning meet Dr. Clayton with more +cordiality of manner than I had yet evinced towards him. Quickly +perceiving the change, he said, as he kissed my brow, "My Rose is +learning to love me, I see." + +And for a brief moment _I_, too, fancied that he was right--that I +_should_ love him--nay, that I was beginning to love him, when +suddenly in the doorway appeared the form of one, the very sight of +whom curdled my blood for an instant and then sent it bounding +through my veins! It was Mr. Delafield. He had nerved himself to +see me, to stand face to face with his rival, and bravely did he meet +the trial, bowing courteously to Dr. Clayton and smiling kindly down +upon me as he bade me good morning. I glanced at him once and saw +that his eyes were riveted upon the plain band of gold, which +encircled my fourth finger, confirming the truth of what he had just +heard from his sister. At last, as if he would test his strength to +the utmost, he took my hand and said, as he slowly twirled the ring, +which was rather large, "And so you are going from us?" + +I could not answer, nor was it needful that I should, for without +waiting a reply he placed my hand in that of Dr. Clayton, and +continued, "As a brother commits a dear sister to the care of +another, so commit I to your care my Northern Rose, charging you to +watch tenderly over her, for 'tis not every one who winneth such a +treasure." + +This was all he said; the next moment he was gone, and when Dr. +Clayton, drawing me to his side, told me how he would treasure up the +words of _my friend_, I involuntarily shrank away, for the _shadow_ +was again around me, and turn which way I would, it whispered to me +of another love--another _heart_, which I fain would have called my +own. + +That night Dr. Clayton left us, and the very morning after his +departure we were surprised by the appearance of Ada, who came +unexpectedly to us all. "She was tired of living with that old +fidgety Mrs. Johnson," she said, "and would rather come home." Much +as Mrs. Lansing liked Ada, she would rather she had stayed away until +I was gone, for she was in constant dread lest the falsehood she had +told me concerning her brother's engagement should in some way be +betrayed. But there was no help for it, and as one sin always calls +for another, so she must now conjure up something with which to meet +the emergency. Accordingly, Ada was told that "somehow or other I +had received the impression that she was engaged to Mr. Delafield, +and that it was as well to let me think so; for though I probably +liked Dr. Clayton well enough, she (Mrs. Lansing) fancied that I +liked her brother better, and that if I supposed there was the +slightest chance of winning him, I would not hesitate to discard the +doctor." + +Very readily Ada fell in with the views of Mrs. Lansing, who proposed +further that they should continually ring in my ears the praises of +my affianced husband, of whose virtues Ada was supposed to have heard +from Mrs. Lansing; while at the same time, I was to be interested as +much as possible in the preparations for my wedding, which was to be +quite a grand affair, and to which many of the village people were to +be invited. And so the days wore on, during which I could hardly be +said to exist, so little did I realize what was passing around me. I +dared not think, for if I did, the tumult of thought which crowded +upon me seemed turning my brain to fire, and when each morning I +awoke from an unrefreshing slumber, it was always with the thought, +"What is it? This load which oppresses me so?"--then, as the stern +reality came up before me, I would bury my face in the pillow and ask +that I might die, and thus escape the living death which awaited me, +and which was now but a week or two in the distance. + + + + +CHAPTER XXIV. + +THE CRISIS. + +It was the night before the one appointed for the bridal, and in the +solitude of her chamber a young girl wept in the utter hopelessness +of despair. At the morrow's early dawn he would be there to claim +her as his bride, and though he was noble and good, there was in her +heart no answering chord of love, and she knew that without such love +their union would be unholy. Earnestly, and with many tears, had she +striven to awaken again the deep affection she had felt for him in +the time gone by, but it could not be, and shudderingly she thought +of the long, weary years when she should be an unloving wife, bearing +a crushed and aching heart, wherein was enshrined the memory of one +of whom it would soon be a sin to think. + +On the table at her side lay her bridal dress, the gift of Richard +Delafield, who, without a shadow on his brow, or a wavering in the +tones of his voice, had asked her to accept it as a token of the +_esteem_ he should ever feel for her! Alas, poor Rose, as your tears +fell like rain upon the orange wreath which seemed to mock your woe, +how little did you dream of the anguish it cost the donor to say to +you the words he did, or that your sorrow was naught compared to his, +for you could weep, while to him this privilege was denied, and his +was the hard task of enduring in silence the burning pain which no +tear-drop came to moisten. + +Slowly the hours of night wore away, and as the moon rose higher and +higher in the heavens, her rays fell upon the bowed form of Rosa, +who, with clasped hands and bloodless cheeks, sat just where first we +saw her--praying--weeping--thinking, and praying again, until at last +there came over her troubled spirit a calm which, ere long, resolved +itself into a fixed determination. "She would tell him all--how she +loved Richard Delafield, and how, though that love were hopeless, she +could not call another her husband." And he would release her--she +knew he would. "But if he should not?" seemed whispered in her ear. +For an instant her heart stood still, and then she answered aloud, "I +will not do this great wickedness, and sin against both God and man." + +It was strange how calm this resolution made her. Rising up from the +crouching posture she had assumed in the first abandonment of her +grief, she walked to the open window, where she stood gazing out upon +the starry sky, until at last, sick and faint with the sweet perfume +of the night air, she turned away, and shuddering, she knew not why, +sought her pillow. It was now the first of June, and in that +southern clime the air was already hot, sultry, and laden with +disease. For two weeks a fearful epidemic, whose nature the oldest +physician did not understand, had been raging in the towns adjoining, +and many who in the morning rose up full of life and vigor, were in +the evening no longer numbered among the living, so rapid was the +work of death. In great alarm the terrified inhabitants had fled +from place to place, but the destroyer was on their track, and the +"brain fever," as it was termed, claimed them for its victims. + +As yet there had been no cases in W----, but the people were in daily +dread of its arrival, and a feeling of gloom pervaded the village. +Mrs. Lansing, on the contrary, though usually alarmed, even at the +mention of a contagious disease, expressed no fear and went on with +the preparations for the party, unconscious of the dark cloud +hovering near. But when on the morning succeeding the night of which +we have spoken she heard, in passing Rosa's door, the sound of some +one talking incoherently, while at the same time a negro girl came +rushing out, exclaiming, "The Lord help us--young Miss has now got +the brain fever, and gone ravin' mad," she fled in wild alarm to the +farthest extremity of the building, and, gathering her frightened +children together, with Ada, around her, she called to the terrified +servants from the window, bidding them go for her brother and tell +him as he valued his life not to venture near the infected room, but +to hasten with all speed to her. And there, trembling, weeping, and +wringing her hands in fear, the selfish, cold-hearted woman stayed, +while parched with fever and thirst, the suffering girl lay moaning +in her pain; now asking for water to cool her burning brain, and +again clasping her thin, white hands convulsively upon her brow, as +if to still its agonized throbbings. + +But one there was who did not forget. In her excitement Mrs. Lansing +failed to notice the absence of little Jessie, who, going fearlessly +to the bedside of her beloved teacher, gently bathed the aching head +and administered the cooling draught, while with childish love she +kissed the ashen lips and smoothed back the long tresses which +floated over the pillow. In the hall below there was the sound of +footsteps, and the bridegroom's voice was heard, asking for his +bride, but his cheek blanched to a marble whiteness when told that +she was dying in the chamber above. In a moment he had her in his +arms--his precious Rose--dying--dying--he believed, for he, too, had +heard of the strange disease, and he thought there was no hope. With +a bitter cry he bent over the unconscious girl, who knew him not, for +the light of reason was obscured and darkness was upon her vision. + +"_Can_ nothing be done? Is there no help?" he exclaimed wildly, and +little Jessie, awed by his grief, answered, as she laid her soft, +white hand on Rosa's forehead, "_God can help her_, and maybe Uncle +Dick can. I mean to go for him," and gliding noiselessly from the +room, she was soon on her way to Sunny Bank, looking, with her golden +curls floating over her bare white shoulders, as if she were indeed +an angel of mercy. + + ------------ + +Alone in his library sat Richard Delafield, his arms resting upon the +table, and his face buried in his hands. All the night long he had +sat there thus, musing sadly of the future when _she_ would be gone, +and he should be alone. Why had she crossed his path--that little, +humble girl, and why had he been permitted to love her so madly, or +to dream of a time when he could call her "_his own, his Rose, his +wife_." Again and again he repeated those words to himself, and then +as he thought whose she would be when another sun should have set, he +groaned aloud, and in despairing tones cried out, "How can I give her +up!" + +The sun had risen, and, struggling through the richly curtained +window, fell upon his bowed head, but he did not heed it. He was +sleeping at last, and in his dreams another than Dr. Clayton had +claimed Rose for his bride, even Death, and without a tear he laid +her in her coffin, and buried her where the soft sighing cedar and +the whispering pine would overshadow her grave. From that dream he +was roused by Jessie, who shrieked in his ear, "Wake, Uncle Dick, and +come. Miss Lee is dying with the fever, and there is nobody to help +her." + +For a time the selfish part of Richard Delafield's nature gained the +ascendant, and he said aloud, "Thank God! Rather thus than the bride +of another." + +Still this feeling did not prevent him from action, and with a firm +step and composed manner he went with Jessie to Cedar Grove, going +immediately to Rosa's chamber, where, for a moment, he stood appalled +at the scene before him. She had fearfully changed since last he saw +her, for the disease had advanced with rapid strides, and now utterly +insensible, and white as the wintry snow, she lay with her head +thrown back, and her lips apart, while her hands nervously picked at +the bed-clothes around her! Many a time had Dr. Clayton heard that +this was a sure omen of death, and though he had ever laughed at it +as an old woman's whim, he shuddered now as he saw it in her, and +bowing his head upon the pillow, he wept like a child. For a moment +Richard Delafield stood gazing upon the apparently dying girl and the +weeping man, who seemed wholly incapable of action: then rousing +himself, he went in quest of the black women, commanding them in a +voice they dared not disobey to come at once to the sick-room. He +had heard that nothing but violent and continual perspiration had as +yet been of any avail in such extreme cases, and calmly giving orders +to that effect, he himself assisted while the hemlock and the bottles +of hot water were applied, then, administering a powerful tonic, he +bade Jessie go for her mother, while he took his station at the +bedside to watch the result. + +Quieted in a measure by the cool demeanor of his companion, Dr. +Clayton, too, arose, and after hurriedly pacing the room, resumed his +post, and there on each side of Rose they stood, those two men, the +one with his fair handsome face stained with tears, praying earnestly +that she might live; while the other, with dark, lowering countenance +and wrinkled brow stood with folded arms, and firmly compressed lips, +struggling to subdue the evil passion which whispered, "Let her die! +There will be a comfort in weeping over her grave, and knowing that +she sleeps there in all her maiden purity." + +In the mean time Jessie had been missed, and a servant despatched to +find her. But this the woman failed to do as she was then at Sunny +Bank, and Mrs. Lansing was about venturing to go in quest of her, +when she appeared with her uncle's message saying, "she knew Miss Lee +was dying, she looked so dreadfully." + +"Jessie--child," screamed the affrighted Mrs. Lansing, shrinking from +the little girl as if she had been a loathsome thing, "have you been +there--in the room?" + +Without any attempt at concealment, Jessie told what she had done, +and when her mother exclaimed, "You are a dead child," she answered +fearlessly, "I am not afraid to die." + +Just then the negro, who had been sent to the village for the family +physician, returned, bringing the news that the fever had broken out +there the night before, and that in one family two were already dead, +while a third was thought to be dying. In the utmost dismay, Mrs. +Lansing now announced her intention of leaving the place at once and +fleeing for safety to her brother's plantation, which was distant +about twelve miles. + +"And leave Miss Lee alone? oh, mother!" said Jessie, beginning to +cry, while Halbert, frightened as he was, remonstrated against the +unfeeling desertion. + +But Mrs. Lansing was determined--"she couldn't help her at all if she +stayed," she said. "And the colored women would do all that was +necessary; it wasn't like leaving her alone with Dr. Clayton, for +there were a dozen, able-bodied females in the house to wait upon +her." + +"And if she dies?" suggested Jessie; but her mother would not hear to +reason, and urged on by Ada, who was no less frightened than herself, +she ordered out the traveling carriage, which soon stood before the +door. + +She would fain have had her brother accompany her, but she knew it +was useless to propose it. Still she would see him before she went, +and her waiting-maid was sent to bring him. + +"I'll go. Let me go," said Jessie, and ere her mother could detain +her, she was half-way there. + +Entering the room on tiptoe, she gave her uncle her mother's message, +and then stealing up to Rose, wound her arms round her neck, and +laying her soft, warm cheek caressingly against the white, thin face +of her teacher, wept her last adieu. They would never, never meet +again, for ere the summer flowers were faded, one would be safely in +the bosom of the Good Shepherd, who would lead her in green pastures, +and beside the still waters of the better land. + +"Bury her under the tall magnolia, a little ways from father," was +Jessie's last injunction to Dr. Clayton, whose tears burst forth +afresh, for not till then had he thought how he must leave her alone +in that far south land--many miles away from her native hills, and +that to him would be denied the solace of weeping over her early +grave. + +------------ + +It was in vain that Mr. Delafield attempted to dissuade his sister +from going. She would not listen, for their lives, she said, were +all endangered by remaining in town, and as several other families +were going to leave, she should follow their example--then bidding +him hasten to them the moment Rose was dead, she entered her carriage +and was driven rapidly away, followed by Halbert and two or three +negroes on horseback. Unfeeling as this proceeding seemed to +Richard, he still experienced a sensation of relief at the absence of +the family, and thinking they would probably be safer at "The Pines" +than at Cedar Grove, he returned to the chamber above, where Rose +still lay, in the same deathlike unconsciousness, perfectly still +save when a movement of the head or a faint moan told how she +suffered. Everything had been done for her which could be done, and +now there was naught for them to do but to wait and watch, which they +did in perfect silence--Dr. Clayton, with his head bowed upon the +pillow, while Mr. Delafield leaned against the wall, with compressed +lips, and eyes dark as midnight, fastened upon the white, still face +before him. + +The clock in the hall struck the hour of eleven, and then, with a +feeble moan, the sick girl withdrew her hand from beneath the +covering, and when the stern man took it within his own he forced +back an exclamation of joy, for it was moist with perspiration! +There was hope, and his first impulse was to tell the good news to +his companion, but the demon, which all the morning he had hugged to +his bosom, whispered, "Not now--let him suffer yet a little longer!" +Soon, however, casting this thought aside as unworthy of him, he +said, "Look up, Dr. Clayton, she is better. She may live. _See!_" +and lifting the damp hair from her brow, he pointed to the dewy drops +which stood thickly upon it. + +"Thank Heaven!" was Dr. Clayton's exclamation, and bending down, he +said, "Rose, my precious Rose--she will live, and _you_ have saved +her," he continued advancing towards the dark statue, whose hand he +pressed to his lips. "To you the credit is due, for you worked when +despair had rendered me powerless to do, but now I am strong. I am +myself again, and if I have any skill it shall be exerted in her +behalf." + +There was a curl on Richard Delafield's lip--a blur before his eyes, +and an icy chill at his heart, which prevented him from answering. +Bitter were the thoughts which crowded upon him, and which he strove +to put away. If she lived, would it not be in a measure owing to the +efficient means he had employed--and why should _he_ wish to save +her? Would he not rather see her dead? It was an evil spirit which +counseled with him thus, but ere long the noble nature of Richard +Delafield conquered, and when at last her eyes unclosed, and turned +towards Dr. Clayton, whose name she breathed, asking for her bridal +dress, he looked on calmly while his rival kissed her again and +again, telling her she should yet wear it and be his bride, but when +he saw how she shuddered at these words, feebly answering, "No, no. +Have they not told you that I cannot be your bride, for another has +come between us?" a thrill of joy ran through his frame, but soon +passed away as he thought it was merely the vagary of a disordered +mind. + +All that day and night they stood over her, applying the remedies +said to be most efficient in cases of the kind, and when the next +morning came she was unquestionably better, though still in great +danger from a tendency of the disease to the lungs which, however, +was less to be feared than its return to the brain. Very carefully +and tenderly they watched her, and had not Mr. Delafield been blinded +by her supposed love for another, he must have seen how much more +readily she took things from him than from Dr. Clayton, following him +with her eyes whenever he moved away, and seeming much more quiet +when he was at her side. By the close of the third day she was +nearly free from the brain fever, but much fear was felt by Dr. +Clayton lest it should assume the typhoid form, which it did ere +long, and then for three weeks she raved in wild delirium, driving +Richard Delafield from her presence, shuddering when he came near, +and begging of Dr. Clayton, whom she called her brother Charlie, "to +send the black man with his ugly face away." + +This state of affairs was almost intolerable to Richard, who, if he +had loved Rose before, felt that she was tenfold dearer to him now, +and so, though he dared not come in her sight when awake, he watched +by her when she slept, standing over her hour after hour, and +enduring with almost superhuman strength the care which Dr. Clayton +could hardly be said to share, so absorbed was he in grief at the +thoughts of losing her at last. Thus the days wore on until her +frenzy abated, and she sank into a state of apathy from which nothing +could rouse her, not even the sight of Richard Delafield, from whom +she no longer shrank, but for whom she seemed to have conceived a +kind of pity, asking him sometimes "if he hated her because she did +not love him, and telling him how hard she had tried to do so, but +could not, and that he must go away and leave her alone!" And all +this while it never occurred to him that she fancied _he_ was Dr. +Clayton, though he _did_ marvel at her never mentioning her affianced +husband, in whose arms she would fall asleep, and whose hand she +would kiss, calling him Charlie, and asking if he had come to carry +her home. + +Matters were in this state when one day, towards the dusk of evening, +he was surprised by the appearance of Halbert, who said that the +_cholera_ had broken out at the Pines, and he must come immediately, +adding further, that his mother and Ada had both had it, that several +of the blacks were dead, and that the man, who two days before had +been sent to Cedar Grove, had died upon the road. Greatly alarmed +for the safety of his people, Mr. Delafield started at once for the +Pines, whither, in another chapter, we will follow him. + + + + +CHAPTER XXV. + +THE ANGEL OF THE PINES. + +The unexpected arrival of their master's sister and her cortége at +"The Pines," as Mr. Delafield's plantation was called, produced quite +a sensation among the blacks, who hastened to receive their guests +with many demonstrations of joy, rather more affected than real, for +Mrs. Lansing was not very popular with them. Halbert and Jessie, on +the contrary, were general favorites among the servants, who thought +them little less than angels, particularly Jessie, who, with her +sweet young face, laughing eyes, and wavy hair, flitted like a +sunbeam from cabin to cabin, asking after this old Aunty, or that old +Uncle, and screaming with delight when in one hut she found _three +babies_, all of an age, and belonging to the same mother, who boasted +of having given to her master "fifteen as likely girls and boys as +there were in Georgy." + +As yet the triplets had no names, but the arrival of the families +suggested a new idea to Hannah, who, seating herself by Jessie, +proposed that they be called, "Richard Delafield, Ada Montrose, and +Jessie Lansing." + +With the first and last the little girl was well pleased, but she +objected to the middle name, and taking one of the infants upon her +lap, she told the story of her beloved teacher, who was dying at +Cedar Grove, and asked that the child she held might be called for +her. So, baptized by Jessie's tears, which fell like rain upon its +dark and wrinkled face, the babe was christened "Rosa _Lee_." + +The house which Mrs. Lansing termed her country residence (for she +always spoke of her brother's possessions as her own), was a large, +double log building, containing nothing very elegant in the way of +furniture, but still presenting an air of neatness and comfort; for +_Aunt Dinah_, who had charge of it, prided herself upon keeping it +neat and clean, as her master was likely to come upon her at any time +without warning, and she liked to impress him with her rare +qualifications as housekeeper. With Mrs. Lansing, however, she was +less pleased, but still as the sister of "Mars'r Richard," she was +entitled to consideration, and now in high turban, and all the +dignity of her position, the old lady bustled about from room to +room, jingling her keys, kicking the dogs, cuffing the woolly pate of +any luckless wight who chanced to be in her way, and occasionally +stooping down to kiss little Jessie, who, being of rather a domestic +turn, followed her from place to place, herself assisting in +spreading the supper-table, which, with its snowy cloth, corn cake, +iced milk, hot coffee, and smoking steaks, soon presented a most +inviting aspect. + +Relieved of their fears and thinking themselves beyond the reach of +danger, Mrs. Lansing and Ada gave themselves up to the enjoyment of +the hour, talking and laughing gaily, without a thought of the sick +girl they had left behindhand who that night was to have been a +bride. Once, indeed, when after sunset they were assembled upon the +rude piazza, Ada spoke of her, wondering if she were _dead_, and how +long it would be ere Dr. Clayton would marry another! Such is the +world, to which Ada formed no exception, for how often do we hear the +future companion of a broken-hearted man selected, even before the +wife of his bosom is removed forever from his sight! + +For a long time Mrs. Lansing sat there with Ada and her children, +talking on indifferent subjects and occasionally congratulating +herself that they were beyond reach of the fever, unless, indeed, +Jessie had contracted it by her foolish carelessness! On her lap +rested the little golden head of the child, who was humming snatches +of "The Happy Land," a favorite song which her uncle had taught her, +and which she had often sung with her teacher, asking numerous +questions concerning the better world, where + + "Saints in glory stand, + Bright, bright as day," + +and wondering if, when she died, Jesus would take her there to sing, + + "Worthy is our Saviour King." + + +Very naturally, now, her thoughts reverted to her governess, and as +she listened to the whispering wind sighing through the trees, she +fancied it was the voice of Rose bidding her, "come to the Happy +Land." Sweet little Jessie, it was the voices of angel children, +which you heard thus calling through the pines; for from their +shining ranks one beauteous form was missing, and they would fain +allure it back to its native sky. + +Come I now to the saddest part of my story. Beneath the evergreens +of the sunny South is a little mound, over which the shining stars +keep watch, and the cypress spreads its long green boughs, while the +children of the plantation, dark-browed though they are, tread softly +near that grave, which they daily strew with flowers, speaking in low +tones of "the Angel of the Pines," as they term the fair young girl, +who passed so suddenly from their midst. It was now nearly five +weeks since Mrs. Lansing had fled from the pestilence which walked at +noonday, and though it had in a measure abated in the village, there +were still frequent cases, and she would not have deemed it safe to +return, even if typhoid fever, which she feared nearly as much, had +not been in her own house. So there was no alternative but to stay, +uncomfortable though she was, for the weather was intensely hot, and +she missed many of the luxuries of her home. Still it was healthy +there, and this in a measure reconciled her to remain. Occasionally, +it is true, she heard rumors of the cholera, on some distant +plantation, but it seldom visited the pine regions--it would not come +there; she was sure of that; and secure in this belief, she rested in +comparative quiet, while each day the heat became more and more +intense. The sun came up red, fiery, and heated like a furnace; the +clouds gave forth no rain; the brooks were dried up; the leaves +withered upon the trees, while the air was full of humming insects, +which, at night fed upon their helpless, sleeping victims. + +At the close of one of these scorching, sultry days, Mrs. Lansing and +Ada sat upon the piazza, panting for a breath of pure, cool air. At +the side of each stood a negro girl, industriously fanning their +mistresses, who scolded them as if they were to blame, because the +air thus set in motion was hot and burning as the winds which blow +over the great desert of Sahara. As they sat there thus, an old man +came up from the negro quarters, saying "his woman done got sick wid +the cramps," and he wished "his mistis jest come down see her." + +But Mrs. Lansing felt herself too languid for exertion of any kind, +and telling Uncle Abel that she herself was fully as sick as his +wife, who was undoubtedly feigning, she sent him back with a sinking +heart to the rude cabin, where his old wife lay, groaning aloud +whenever the cramps, as she termed them, seized her. Scarcely, +however, had he entered the low doorway, when a fairy form came +flitting down the narrow pathway, her white dress gleaming through +the dusky twilight, and her golden hair streaming out behind. It was +little Jessie, who, from her crib, had heard her mother's refusal to +accompany Uncle Abel, and, stealing away unobserved, she had come +herself to see Aunt Chloe, with whom she was quite a favorite. + +Unaccustomed as Jessie was to sickness, she saw at a glance that this +was no ordinary case, and kneeling down beside the negress, who lay +upon the floor, she took her head upon her lap, and gently pushing +back, beneath the gay turban, the matted, grizzly hair, she asked +where the pain was. + +"Bress de sweet chile," answered Chloe, "you can't tache me with the +pint of a cambric needle whar 'tain't, and seems ef ebery jint in me +was onsoderin' when de cramp is on." + +As if to verify the truth of this remark, she suddenly bent up nearly +double, and rolling upon her face, groaned aloud. At this moment a +negro, who had gained some notoriety among his companions as a +physician, came in, and after looking a moment at the prostrate form +of Chloe, who was now vomiting freely, he whispered a word which +cleared the cabin in a moment, for the mention of _cholera_ had a +power to curdle the blood of the terrified blacks, who fled to their +own dwellings, where they cried aloud, and praying, some of them, +"that de Lord would have mercy on 'em, and take somebody else to +kingdom come, ef He must have a nigger anyway." + +Utterly fearless, Jessie stayed by, and when John, or as he was more +familiarly known, "Doctor," proposed going for her mother, she +answered, "No, no; Uncle Abel has been for her once, but she won't +come; and if she knows it is cholera, she'll take me away." + +This convinced the "Doctor," who proceeded to put in practise the +medical skill which he had picked up at intervals, and which was +considerable for one of his capacity. By this time, a few of the +women, more daring than the rest and curious to know the fate of +their companion, ventured near the door, where they stood gazing +wonderingly upon the poor old creature, who was fast floating out +upon the broad river of death. It was a most violent attack, and its +malignity was increased by a quantity of unripe fruit which she had +eaten that morning. + +"Will somebody make a pra'r?" she said, feebly, as she felt her life +fast ebbing away. "Abel, you pray for poor Chloe," and her glassy +eyes turned beseechingly towards her husband, who was noted at +camp-meetings for praying the loudest and longest of any one. + +But his strength had left him now, and kissing the shriveled face of +his dying wife, he said, "'Scuse me, Chloe; de sperrit is willin', +but de flesh part is mighty weak and shaky like. Miss Jessie, you +pray!" he continued, as the child came to his side. + +"Yes, honey, pray," gasped Chloe; and kneeling down, the little girl +began the Lord's Prayer, occasionally interspersing it with a +petition that "God would take the departing soul to heaven." + +"Yes, dat's it," whispered Chloe; "dat's better dan all dem fine +words 'bout kingdom come and daily bread; dey'll do for white folks, +but God bress old Chloe, de thing for niggers to die on." + +"Sing, honey, sing," she said, at last; and, mingled with the +lamentations of the blacks, there arose on the evening air the soft +notes of the _Happy Land_, which Jessie sang, bending low towards +Chloe, who, when the song was ended, clasped her in her arms, and +calling her a "shining angel," went, we trust, to the better land, +where bondage is unknown, and the slave is equal to his master. + +Loud and shrill rose the wail of the negroes, increasing in violence +when it was known that into another cabin the pestilence had entered, +prostrating a boy, who, in his agony, called for Jessie and Mas'r +Richard, thinking they could save him. Late as it was, Mrs. Lansing, +Ada, and Lina, were still upon the piazza, which was far more +comfortable than their sleeping-room, where they supposed both +Halbert and Jessie were safely in bed. They were just thinking of +retiring, when suddenly the midnight stillness was broken by a cry so +shrill that Mrs. Lansing started to her feet, asking what it was. + +From her couch by the open door, Aunt Dinah arose, and going out a +few rods, listened to the sound, which seemed to come from the negro +quarters, whither, at her mistress's command, she bent her steps. +But a short time elapsed ere she returned with the startling news +that, "the cholera was thar--that Chloe was dead, and another one had +got it and was _vomucking_ all over the night-dress of _Miss Jessie_, +who was holdin' his head." + +Wholly overcome with fright, Mrs. Lansing fainted, and was borne to +her room, where, for a time, she remained unconscious, forgetful of +Jessie, who stayed at the quarters long after midnight, ministering +to the wants of the sick, of which, before morning, there were five, +while others showed symptoms of the rapidly spreading disease. As +soon as Mrs. Lansing returned to consciousness, she sent for Jessie, +who came reluctantly, receiving her mother's reproof in silence, and +falling away to sleep as calmly as if she had not just been looking +upon death, whose shadow was over and around her. + +Early the next morning, a man was sent in haste to Cedar Grove, which +he never reached, for the destroyer met him on the road, and in one +of the cabins of a neighboring plantation, he died, forgetting, in +the intensity of his sufferings, the errand on which he had been +sent; and as those who attended him knew nothing of Mrs. Lansing's +being at the Pines, it was not until the second day after the +appearance of the cholera that she learned the fate of her servant. +In a state bordering almost upon distraction, she waited for her +brother, shuddering with fear whenever a new case was reported to +her, and refusing to visit the sufferers, although among them were +some who had played with her in childhood; and one, an old +gray-haired man, who had saved her from a watery grave, when on the +Savannah River she had fallen overboard. But there was no place for +gratitude in her selfish heart, and the miserable creatures were left +to die alone, uncheered by the presence of a pale face, save little +Jessie, who won her mother's reluctant consent to be with them, and +who, all the day long, went from cabin to cabin, soothing the sick +and dying by her presence, and emboldening others by her own +intrepidity. + +Towards sunset, Mrs. Lansing herself was seized with the malady, and +with a wild shriek, she called on Ada to help her; but that young +lady was herself too much intimidated to heed the call, and in an +adjoining room she sat with camphor at her nose and brandy at her +side, until a fierce, darting pain warned her that she, too, was a +victim. No longer afraid of Mrs. Lansing, she made no resistance +when borne to the same apartment, where for hours they lay, bemoaning +the fate which had brought them there, and trembling as they thought +of the probable result. + +On Mrs. Lansing's mind there was a heavy load, and once when the cold +perspiration stood thickly upon her face, she ordered Jessie and +Dinah from the room, while she confessed to Ada the sin of which she +had been guilty in deceiving both her brother and Rose. + +"It was a wicked falsehood," said she, "and if you survive me, you +must tell them so, will you?" + +Ada nodded in token that she would, and then, thinking her own +conscience might be made easier by a similar confession, she told how +she had thought to injure Rose in Mr. Delafield's estimation, and +also of the blister, which had drawn on Hagar's back instead of her +own! This done, the two ladies felt greatly relieved, and as the +cholera in their case had been induced mostly by fear, it began ere +long to yield to the efficient treatment of Dinah, who to her +housekeeping qualities added that of being a skilful nurse. Towards +morning they were pronounced decidedly better, and as Jessie was +asleep and Dinah nodding in her chair, Mrs. Lansing lifted her head +from her pillow, saying to Ada, "If you please, you needn't tell what +I told you last night, when I thought I was going to die!" + +Ada promised to be silent, and after winning a similar promise from +Mrs. Lansing, they both fell asleep, nor woke again until the sun was +high up in the heavens. So much for a sick-bed repentance! + +That day was hotter and more sultry than any which had preceded it; +and about the middle of the afternoon little Jessie came to Dinah's +side and laying her head upon her lap complained of being both _cold_ +and _tired_. Blankets were wrapped around her, but they brought to +her no warmth, for her blood was chilled by approaching death, and +when at dusk the negroes asked why she came not among them, they were +told that she was dying! With streaming eyes they fell upon their +knees, and from those humble cabins there went up many a fervent +prayer for God to spare the child. But it could not be; she was +wanted in heaven; and when old Uncle Abel, who had also been ill, +crept on his hands and knees to her bedside, calling upon her name, +she did not know him, for unconsciousness was upon her, and in +infinite mercy she was spared the pain usually attendant upon the +disease. + +Almost bereft of reason and powerless to act, Mrs. Lansing sat by her +child, whose life was fast ebbing away. In a short time all the +negroes, who were able, had come to the house, their dark faces +stained with tears and expressive of the utmost concern, as they +looked upon the little girl who lay so white and still, with her fair +hair floating over the pillow and her waxen hands folded upon her +bosom. + +"Sing to me, Uncle Dick," she said at last, "sing of the Happy Land +not far away;" but Uncle Dick was not there, and they who watched her +were too much overcome with grief to heed her request. + +Slowly the hours wore on, and the spirit was almost home, when again +she murmured, "Sing of the Happy Land;" and as if in answer to her +prayer, the breeze, which all the day long had been hushed and still, +now sighed mournfully through the trees, while a mockingbird in the +distance struck up his evening lay; and amid the gushing melody of +that wondrous bird of song and the soft breathing notes of the +whispering pines, little Jessie passed to the "Happy Land," which to +those who watched the going out of her short life, seemed, indeed, +"not far away." + +With a bitter cry the bereaved mother fell upon her face and wept +aloud, saying, in her heart, "My God, my God, why have I thus been +dealt with!" + +In the distance was heard the sound of horses' feet, and ere long her +brother was with her, weeping as only strong men weep, over the +lifeless form which returned him no answering caress. She had been +his idol, and for a moment he, too, questioned the justice of God in +thus afflicting him. + +"Jessie is gone, Rosa is going, and I shall be left alone," he +thought. "What have I done to deserve a chastisement like this?" + +Soon, however, he grew calmer, and saying, "It is well;" he tenderly +kissed the lips and brow of the beautiful child, who seemed to smile +on him even in death; then going out among his people, he comforted +them as best he could, dropping more than one tear to the memory of +those who they told him were dead, and who numbered eight in all. At +a short distance from the house was a tall cypress where Jessie had +often sported, and where now was a play-house, built by her hands but +a few days before. There, by the light of the silvery moon, they +made her a grave, and when the sun was up, its rays fell upon the +pile of earth which hid from view the sunny face and soft blue eyes +of Jessie, "the Angel of the Pines." + + + + +CHAPTER XXVI. + +RETURN. + +For nearly a week after Jessie's death, Mr. Delafield remained at the +Pines, doing whatever he could for the comfort of his servants, and +as at the end of that time the disease had wholly disappeared, he +returned to Cedar Grove, accompanied by his sister and Ada, who had +learned by sad experience that the dangers from which we flee, are +oftentimes less than those to which we go. They found Rose better, +but still quite low, and as the fever had not entirely left her, +neither Mrs. Lansing nor Ada ventured near her room, but shut +themselves in their own apartment, where the former received the +sympathy of her friends, which in this case was truly sincere, for +Jessie was universally beloved and the tidings of her death carried +sorrow to many hearts. + +Over Dr. Clayton a change had come. The hopeful, happy expression of +his face was gone, and in its place was a look of utter hopelessness +which at first roused Richard's fears lest Rose should be worse, and +in much alarm he asked if it were so. + +"No, no," answered the doctor, while a shadow of pain passed over his +handsome features; "she will live." + +Then hurrying to the window he looked out to hide his tears from him +whom he knew to be his rival, and who, now that he was unobserved, +bent over the sleeping Rose, kissing her wasted cheek and mourning +for her as he thought how she would weep when she learned the fate of +her favorite. Oh, could he have known the whole, how passionately +would he have clasped her to his bosom and held her there as his own, +his darling Rose! But it was not yet to be, and he must bide his +time. + +She had seemed greatly relieved at his absence, and on the second day +after his departure, she called Dr. Clayton to her side, fancying him +to be her brother Charlie. Taking his hands in hers, she told him +the whole story of her trials; how she had tried to bring back the +old affection of her childhood, but could not because of the love she +had for Richard Delafield. + +"Oh Charlie," she exclaimed, "he would forgive me, I know, if he knew +how much I suffered during those terrible days, when I thought of +giving my hand without my heart. The very idea set my brain on fire +and my head has ached, oh, so hard since then, but it's over now, for +I conquered at last, and on the night before the wedding, I resolved +to tell him all, how I could not and would not marry him. But a dark +cloud, which seemed like the rushing of mighty waters, came over me, +and I don't know where I am, nor what has happened, only he has been +here, hanging like a shadow over my pillow, where sat another shadow +tenfold blacker, which he said was death; but grim and hideous as it +was, I preferred it to a life with him, when my whole soul was given +to another. He, too, was here occasionally, and in his presence the +shadow grew less and less, while his voice called me back from the +deep darkness in which I was groping. Once, when I was almost home, +so near that I heard the song which little Jamie sings--Jamie, who +died so long ago--he laid his cool hand upon my forehead, which was +wet with the waters of the rolling river, and I heard him say to some +one, 'Look up; she is better, she will live.' The next moment he was +gone, but I struggled with the waves and floated back to the shore, +where, though I could not see him, his hand was stretched out to save +me, and for a time he stood between me and Dr. Clayton, who, when he +thought nobody heard him, whispered in my ear, 'my bride--my own.' +But from my inmost soul I answered, 'Never, never,' while I looked +again towards the river which is still in sight, though slowly +receding from view." + +She paused a moment and then continued: "When I am dead, Charlie, you +must tell him how it was, and ask him to forgive and think with pity +of poor little Rose, who would have loved him if she could. If he +will not listen--if he still persists in marrying me, tell him I +would rather die ten thousand deaths than wed a man I do not love, +and then his pride will come to his aid. But not a word of this to +Mr. Delafield, Charlie, never let him know how I loved him. My +affection is not returned, and he would despise me--would never visit +my grave or think with pity of one who died so far away from home." + +Then followed a message for the loved ones of Meadow Brook, but this +Dr. Clayton did not hear. Perfectly paralyzed, he had listened to +her story until his reason seemed in danger of leaving him, and long +ere she had finished he knew he must give her up--but not to _death_; +and as Richard Delafield had done, so he, in this his hour of bitter +trial, felt how much rather he would see her in her coffin than the +wife of another. Then in his ear the tempter whispered, "Why need +these things be? she is not yet out of danger. A little relaxation +of care on your part and Richard Delafield will never call her his." + +Only for a moment, however, did Dr. Clayton listen, and then laying +his head upon the pillow beside that of Rose, who, wearied with her +story, had fallen asleep, he wept as he had never wept before, not +even when he saw creeping over her the shadow of death. Turn which +way he would, there was naught before him save the darkness of +despair; and as wave after wave broke over him, his mind went +backward to the time when she might have been his--when he could have +gathered her to his bosom--and in piteous accents he cried aloud, "My +punishment is greater than I can bear." + +But as the fiercest storm soonest expends its fury, so he ere long +grew calm and capable of sober, serious thought. Rosa Lee was very +dear to him, and to have possessed her love, he would have given +almost everything; but as that could not be, ought he to stand in the +way of her happiness? He knew she was deceived, for he remembered +many things he had seen in Mr. Delafield, which, though, he had not +thought of it then, convinced him now that her affection was +reciprocated; and should he not tell her so, and at the same time +disclose to Richard the true state of affairs? Rosa's quiet, +unobtrusive, and rather reserved manner had misled Richard, no doubt, +or he would long ere this have declared his love. + +"Yes, God helping me, I _will_ do right," he said aloud, clasping his +hands over his feverish brow. "I will watch by her until _his_ +return, and then committing her to his care I will leave her forever." + +There was a movement at his side--Rose was dreaming, and she uttered +the name of _Richard_, while, with a shiver, the doctor stopped his +ears and shut out the hated sound. In a moment she awoke and asked +for water. It was brought, but he no longer supported her in his +arms--no longer smoothed back the tangled curls from her brow, or +kissed her white lips. "She is not mine, and it were wrong to caress +her now," he thought, and his tears fell upon her face as he laid her +gently back upon the pillow. Wonderingly she gazed upon him, and +lifting her hand, wiped his tears away, asking why he wept. + +"Heaven help me from going mad," he exclaimed aloud, as he walked to +the window, where for a long time he stood, trying to school himself +for the part he was to act. + +He succeeded at last, and never did a tender brother watch more +carefully over a darling sister than did he over her during the few +days which elapsed ere Mr. Delafield's return. He was alone with her +when he came, and with comparative calmness he greeted his rival, +who, as we have before stated, was surprised at the change in his +looks. + +That night, in the solitude of his chamber, the doctor penned two +letters; one for Rose and the other for Richard. In substance, the +contents of each were much the same, for he told them all he had +heard from Rose, and how, though it broke his heart to do so, he had +given her up. "Deal very, very gently with her," he wrote to Mr. +Delafield, "for never was there a purer, gentler being, or one more +worthy of your love than she. Then take her, and when your cup is +overflowing with happiness, think sometimes of one who, henceforth, +will be a lonely, wretched man." + +The letters being written, he put them away until such time as he +should need them. Once he thought to talk with Richard face to face, +but this he felt he could not do; so one morning about a week after +the return of the family to Cedar Grove, and when Rose was out of +danger, he pressed a burning kiss upon her forehead, and placing the +letters on the little dressing-bureau where they would attract the +immediate attention of Mr. Delafield, who, he knew would soon be +there, he went in quest of Mrs. Lansing, whom he bade good-by as +composedly as if no inward fire were consuming him. In much +surprise, she asked why he left them so abruptly, and he replied, +"something which has recently come to my knowledge makes it necessary +for me to go." + +"You will of course return ere long for Miss Lee," continued the +lady, who had no suspicion of the truth. + +"If _I_ do not come I shall send her brother as soon as she is able +to be moved," said he. "She does not know that I am going, for she +would not understand me if I told her, so I leave it with you to tell +her when you think she will comprehend it." + +Then leaving a few directions as to how she must be treated, he +hurried away, never looking back, and turning into a side street when +in the distance he saw Mr. Delafield coming towards him. Half an +hour afterward and the puffing engine, which now each day thundered +into town, was bearing him away from a place whither he had come for +a bride, and from which he bore only a crushed and aching heart. +Scarcely had he left Rose's chamber when a colored woman entered it +to "set it to rights" as was her daily custom. She was near-sighted, +and going up to the dressing-bureau, carelessly brushed off the +letter directed to Richard! Falling behind the bureau, it lay +concealed from view, while the negress proceeded with her duties, +unconscious of the mischief she had done! + +In great surprise Richard heard of Dr. Clayton's sudden departure. +"There must be something wrong," he thought, though what he did not +know. Going up to Rosa's chamber, he found her still asleep. The +room was in order--the servant gone, and on the bureau lay the letter +which soon caught his attention. Glancing at the superscription he +saw it was for Rose, and thinking to keep it safely until she could +understand its contents, he placed it in his pocket; then taking a +book, he sat by her bedside until she awoke. She was apparently +better, but an unnatural brightness of her eyes told that her mind +was still unsettled. So he said nothing to her concerning the +doctor's desertion, but himself ministered to her wants. + +In the course of a few days Mrs. Lansing was induced to visit her. +This she did more willingly, for Rose had loved her little Jessie; +she would weep bitterly when she knew she was dead; and the proud +nature of the haughty woman gave way to the softer feelings, which +often prompts a mother to take a deeper interest in whatever was once +dear to a lost, a precious child. So casting aside her nervous fear, +she at last went frequently to the sick-room, her own white, delicate +hands sometimes arranging the tumbled pillow or holding the cooling +draught to the lips of her formerly despised governess--despised, not +for anything which she had done, but because it was hers to labor for +the bread she ate. + + + + +CHAPTER XXVII. + +LIGHT. + +It was early morning. The windows of my room were open, admitting +the fresh, cool air, which had been purified by one of those terrific +thunder storms, so common in a southern clime. For many weeks I had +lain there in a state of unconsciousness, save at intervals when I +had a dreamy realization of what was transpiring around me. The +physician who was called in Dr. Clayton's stead had more than once +hinted of continued insanity, citing similar cases which had come +under his observation; but in spite of his opinion, I, that bright +August morning, awoke from a refreshing sleep, with perfectly +restored faculties. At first I thought I was alone, for there was a +deep stillness in the room, and from the hall below I distinctly +heard the ticking of the clock, reminding me of the time, years ago, +when once before I had hovered between life and death. Now, as then, +I experienced the delicious feeling of returning health, but I missed +the familiar faces of my friends, and as I thought how far I was from +home, and all who loved me, I said aloud, "I am alone, alone." + +"Not alone, Rosa, for I am with you," answered a deep voice near, and +the next moment the dark form of Richard Delafield bent over me. + +Eagerly scanning my face, he said, "Do you know me?" + +"Yes," I answered. "Mr. Delafield." Then as a dim remembrance of +the past came over me, I lifted my head and looked around the room +for one who I knew had not long since been there. + +Divining my thought, he said very gently, as if the announcement +would of course give me pain, "He is not here, Rosa. He was obliged +to go home, but I dare say he will soon return--meantime I will take +care of you. Don't feel so badly," he continued, as tears of +_genuine joy_ at Dr. Clayton's absence gathered in my eyes. + +I could not tell him the truth, and when I next spoke it was to ask +him concerning my illness, how long it had been, etc. + +After telling me all that he thought proper, he took the letter from +his pocket, and said, "Dr. Clayton left this for you. Have you +strength to read it now?" + +"Yes, yes," I replied eagerly, at the same time stretching out my +hand to take it. + +There was a blur upon my eyes as I read, and I pitied Dr. Clayton, +who had thus laid bare to me his wretchedness, but mingled with this +was a feeling of relief to know that I was free. He told me what he +had written to Mr. Delafield, and when I came to that portion of the +letter, I involuntarily uttered an exclamation of delight, while I +glanced timidly towards him. _But he made no sign_. The letter +which would have explained all was safely lodged behind the bureau, +and with a gloomy brow he watched me while I read, interpreting my +emotions into the satisfaction he naturally supposed I would feel in +hearing from my lover. With me the revulsion was too great, for I +fancied I saw in the expression of his face contempt for one who had +presumed to love him, and bursting into tears, I cried and laughed +alternately, while he tried to soothe me; but I would not be +comforted by him.--he hated me, I knew, and very pettishly I told him +at last "to let me alone and go away--I was better without him than +with him," I said, "and he would oblige me by leaving the room." + +The next moment I repented my harshness, which I knew had caused him +pain, for there was a look of sorrow upon his face as he complied +with my request. But I was too proud to call him back, and for the +next half-hour I cried and fretted alone, first at him for making Dr. +Clayton think he loved me when he didn't, secondly, at Dr. Clayton +for meddling with what didn't concern him, and lastly, at myself, for +being so foolish as to care whether anybody loved me or not! At the +end of that time Richard came back. The cloud had disappeared, and +very good-humoredly he asked "if I had got over my pet, and if I +wanted anything." + +I did not, but wishing to make amends for my former ill-humor, I +asked him _to shut the windows_, which he did, opening them again in +less than five minutes, and fanning me furiously, I was "so hot and +fidgety." For several hours he humored all my whims and caprices, +and then, as he saw I was tiring myself out, he began to exercise his +authority over me, telling me once, I remember, "to lie still and +behave, or I would make myself worse!" + +Intimidated by his voice and manner, I sank down among my pillows, +nor stirred again until I awoke from a sweet sleep into which I had +fallen. This time he was gone, but Mrs. Lansing was with me, and the +tones of her voice seemed unusually kind as she addressed me. +Richard again came in, bearing a beautiful bouquet, which he +presented to me "as a peace offering," he said, "for having scolded +me so in the morning." + +Before night I was so much better that Ada, Lina, and Halbert came in +to see me, each expressing their pleasure at my convalescence. But +one there was who came not to greet me, and at whose absence I +greatly marvelled. She had ever been the first to meet me in the +morning, and the last to leave me at night. Why, then, did she tarry +now, when I wished so much to see her? Alas, I did not know that +never again would her home be gladdened by the sunshine of her +presence, for it was Jessie whom I missed--Jessie for whom I +longed--straining my ear to catch the sound of her ringing laugh or +bounding footsteps. + +At last, as the day wore on and she did not come, I asked for her and +why she stayed so long away. + +Wringing her hands, Mrs. Lansing exclaimed, "Tell her, Richard, I +cannot. It will kill me. Oh, Jessie, Jessie!" + +But I had no need for further knowledge. I saw what I had not before +observed, viz., the mourning garments of those around me, and in +tears of anguish, I cried, "My darling is dead!" + +"Yes, Jessie is dead," answered Richard. "We shall never see her +again, for she is safe in the Happy Land, of which you so often told +her." + +I could not weep. My sorrow was too great for tears, and covering my +face I thought for a long, long time. "Why was it," I asked myself, +"that always when death had hovered near me, _I_ had been spared, and +another taken," for, as in the case of Jessie, so it had been with +brother Jamie--they had died, while I had lived, and with a fervent +thanksgiving to Heaven, which had dealt thus mercifully with me, I +prayed that it might not be in vain. + +Gradually, as I could bear it, Mr. Delafield told me the sad +story--how she had hung fearlessly over my pillow when all else had +deserted me--how she had come for him--and how naught but her +mother's peremptory commands had taken her from my side. As he +talked, there came back to me a vague recollection of a fairy form, a +seraph I thought it to have been, which, when the dark river was +running fast at my feet, had hovered near, whispering to me words of +love, and bidding some one bury me beneath the tall magnolia. Then +he told me how she had stood like a ministering spirit by the rude +conch of the poor Africans, who, with their dying breath, had blessed +her, calling her "The Angel of the Pines." From her head he himself +had shorn her beautiful shining curls, one of which he gave to me, +and which I prize as my most precious treasure; for often as I look +upon it, I see again the little gleeful girl, my "Georgia rose," who, +for a brief space, dwelt within her fair southern home, and was then +transplanted to her native soil, where now she blooms, the fairest, +sweetest flower of all which deck the fields of heaven. + +The shock of her death very naturally retarded my recovery, and for +many weeks more was I confined to my room. About the middle of +October, Charlie, whose coming I had long expected, arrived, bringing +to me the sad news that death had again entered our household, that +by my father's and Jamie's grave was another mound, and at home +another vacant chair, that of my aged grandmother, whose illness, he +said, had prevented him from coming to me sooner, adding further that +they had purposely kept her sickness from me, fearing the effect it +might have. Of Dr. Clayton he could tell me but little. He had not +visited Meadow Brook at all, but immediately after his return to +Boston, he had written to them, saying I was out of danger, and +Charlie must go for me, as soon as the intense heat of summer was +over. This was all they knew, though with a woman's ready tact, both +my mother and my sisters conjectured that something was wrong, and +Charlie's first question after telling me what he did, was to inquire +into the existing state of affairs between me and the doctor, and if +it were my illness alone which had deferred the marriage. + +"Don't ask me now," I replied, "not until we are far from here, and +then I will tell you all." + +This silenced Charlie, and once when Mr. Delafield questioned him +concerning Dr. Clayton, and why he, too, did not come for me, he +replied evasively, but in a manner calculated still further to +mislead Mr. Delafield, who had no suspicion of the truth, though he +fancied there was something wrong. In the meantime he was to me the +same kind friend, ministering to all my wants, and with a lavish +generosity procuring for me every delicacy, however costly it might +be. + +One day Charlie, with his usual abruptness, said to me, "Rose, why +didn't you fall in love with Mr. Delafield? I should much rather +have him than a widower." + +The hot blood rushed to my cheeks as I replied quickly, "He is +engaged to Miss Montrose. They were to have been married this fall, +Mrs. Lansing said, but the marriage is, I presume, deferred on +account of their recent affliction. At least I hear nothing said of +it." + +"If I am any judge of human nature," returned Charlie, "Mr. Delafield +cares far more for _you_ than for Miss Montrose, even if they _are_ +engaged. But then you are poor, while she is rich, and that I +suppose makes the difference." + +I knew Mr. Delafield too well to suspect him of mercenary motives in +marrying Ada, and so I said, "He loved her, of course, and it was +natural that he should, for though she had some faults, he probably +saw in her enough of good to overbalance the bad." + +And still I could not help thinking that, as Charlie had said, his +attentions to me were far more loverlike than they were towards her. +But then I fancied that his kindness was prompted by the pity which +he felt for me, a young girl so far from home. Thus the days wore +on, leaving me deceived--and him deceived, while the letter still lay +behind the bureau! + +At last the morning dawned on which I was to say good-by to the +scenes I loved so well. I was to leave the "sunny South," with its +dark evergreens, its flowering vines, its balmy air. I was to leave +_him_, who, ere the next autumn leaves were falling, would take to +his beautiful home a bride. Then I thought of little Jessie's grave, +which I had not seen, and on which my tears would never fall, and +taking from its hiding-place the tress of shining hair, I wept over +that my last adieu. It was later than usual when Mr. Delafield +appeared, and as he came in I saw that he was very pale. + +"Are you sick?" I asked, as he wiped the perspiration from his face. + +"No, no," he hurriedly answered; at the same time crossing over to a +side table, he poured out and drank two large goblets of ice water. + +Then resuming his former seat near me, he took my hand, and looking +me earnestly in my face, said, "_Rose_, shall I ever see you here +again?" + +Before I could answer, Ada, chimed in, "Of course we shall. Do coax +the doctor to bring you here sometime, and let us see how you bear +the honors of being madam!" + +Instantly the earnest look passed away from Mr. Delafield's face, and +was succeeded by a scowl, which remained until the carriage which was +to take me to the dépôt was announced. Then the whole expression of +his countenance changed, and for a brief instant my heart thrilled +with joy, for I could not mistake the deep meaning of his looks as he +bent over me and whispered his farewell. + +"God bless you, Rose," he said. "_My Rose_ I once hoped to call you. +But it cannot be. Farewell!" + +There was one burning kiss upon my lips, and the next moment he was +gone. + +"Are you going to the dépôt?" asked his sister, as he was leaving the +room. + +"No, no, no," he replied, and then as Charlie again bade me come, I +rose bewildered to my feet, hardly realizing when Mrs. Lansing, Ada +and Lina bade me adieu. Halbert went with me in the carriage, and +together with Charlie looked wonderingly at me, as I unconsciously +repeated in a whisper, "_My Rose_ I once hoped to call you. It is +_Ada_ who stands in the way," I said to myself, and covering my face +with my veil, I wept as I thought of all I had lost when Richard +Delafield offered his heart to another. He _did_ love me. I was +sure of that, but what did it avail me. He was too honorable to +break his engagement with Ada, so henceforth I must walk alone, +bearing the burden of an aching heart. + + ------------ + +"Oh, I have loved you so much," said Halbert, winding his arms about +my neck--"loved you as I shall never love another teacher," and the +boy's tears flowed fast as he bade me good-by. + +One parting glance at Cedar Grove, one last lingering look at Sunny +Bank, one thought of Jessie's grave, and then the hissing engine shot +out into the woods, leaving them all behind. Leaning back on +Charlie's arm and drawing my veil over my face, I thought how +impossible it was that I should ever visit that spot again. + + ------------ + +In the meantime a far different scene was being enacted in the +apartment I had just vacated. Scarcely had the whistle of the engine +died away in the distance, when a troup of blacks, armed with boiling +suds and scrubbing-brushes, entered my chamber for the purpose of +cleaning it. They had carried from it nearly every article of +furniture, and nothing remained save the matting and the bureau, the +latter of which they were about to remove when they were surprised at +the unexpected appearance of Mr. Delafield, who could not resist the +strong desire which he felt to stand once more in the room where +_Rose_ had spent so many weary weeks. For a moment the blacks +suspended their employment, and then Linda, who seemed to be leading, +took hold of the bureau, giving one end of it a shove towards the +center of the room. The movement dislodged the long-lost letter, +which, covered with dirt and cobwebs, fell upon the floor, at her +feet. She was the same woman who, weeks before, had carelessly +knocked off the letter, which she now picked up and handed to Mr. +Delafield, saying, as she wiped off the dirt, "It must have laid thar +a heap of a while, and now I think on't, 'pears like ever so long +ago, when I was breshin' the bureau, I hearn somethin' done drap, but +I couldn't find nothin', and it must have been this." + +Glancing at the superscription, and recognizing the handwriting of +Dr. Clayton, Mr. Delafield broke the seal, and read! From black to +white--from white to red--from red to speckled--and from speckled +back again to its natural color, grew his face as he proceeded, while +his eyes grew so dazzlingly bright with the intensity of his feelings +that the negroes, who watched him, whispered among themselves that he +"must be gwine stark mad." + +His active, quick-seeing mind took in the meaning of each sentence, +and even before he had finished the letter he understood everything +just as it was--why Rose had appeared so strangely when she read Dr. +Clayton's letter to herself, and realized perfectly what her feelings +must have been as day after day went by and he still "_made no sign_." + +"But she is mine now, _thank Heaven!_ and nothing shall take her from +me," he exclaimed aloud, unmindful of the presence of the negroes, +who, confirmed in their impression of his insanity, looked curiously +after him as he went down the stairs, down the walk, and out into the +street, proceeding with rapid strides towards the dépôt. + + + + +CHAPTER XXVIII. + +THE CHASE. + +The railroad which passed through W---- was only a branch of the main +route leading to Charleston, and consequently there were but two +passenger trains each way per day; and as Mr. Delafield's great +object now was to reach Charleston before the boat in which Rose was +to sail should leave the landing, it seemed impossible for him to +wait until night, for not until then was the next train due. +Suddenly he remembered that the express train left Augusta about four +o'clock P.M. It was now ten, and he could easily reach it in time +for the cars, provided there had been no change in the time table. +To ascertain this, therefore, he hastened to the dépôt, where to his +dismay he learned that the train left Augusta at two. + +But with him to will was to do. Flying rather than walking back to +his house, he called out Bill, his coachman, startling him with the +inquiry as to whether it would be possible, with his best horses, a +span of beautiful dappled grays, which were valued at a thousand +dollars, to drive to Augusta in less than four hours. + +Besides being naturally lazy and unwilling for exertion of any kind, +_Bill_ was also remarkably tender of said grays, who were his pride, +and whom he had named _Fred_ and _Ferd_. On hearing his master's +inquiry, therefore, he looked perfectly aghast, and diving both hands +into his matted wool, by way of illustration undoubtedly, replied, +"Mighty tough scratching I can tell you, mars'r. Them ponies hain't +been driv, only what I've ex'cized 'em for health, for better'n a +month, and to run 'em as I'd hev to run 'em, would kill 'em stone +dead. No, mars'r, can't think on't for a minit," and as if this were +conclusive, and his word the law, Bill stuffed his hands into his +bagging trousers, and was walking quietly away, when Mr. Delafield +stopped him, saying, "I shall try it at all events. So get out the +carriage immediately, and mind you are not over five minutes doing +it. Ask some one to help you, if necessary--ho, Jack," and he called +to a ragged mulatto boy who was doing nothing, and bade him assist +Bill in harnessing the horses. + +Rolling his white eyes in utter astonishment at what seemed to him +the folly of his master, Bill began to expostulate, "Lor, mars'r, you +kill"---- + +"Silence, and do as I bid you," said Mr. Delafield, in a tone which +Bill thought best to obey, and sauntering off to the stables, he +brought out the ponies, who pranced and pawed the ground, while he +admired their flowing manes and smooth shining coats. + +Then seeing Jack standing near, ready to help, he haughtily ordered +him away, saying, "Nobody but myself is fit to tache these critters. +They'd know in a minit if a low-lived nigger like you came a near." + +Nothing loath, Jack walked off, while Bill proceeded leisurely to +harness the beautiful animals, talking to them as if they were +intelligent beings, and telling them, "never to fear--they wan't a +gwine to be druv to Gusty in two hours, and no sich thing. Bill sot +on the box, and 'twas nothin' to mars'r, who was lollin' on the +cushions inside." + +At this point he was startled by the voice of Mr. Delafield, who, +having hastily packed a few articles in his portmanteau, and written +a line to his sister, had come out to superintend in person the +movements of his servant, whose peculiarities he perfectly understood. + +"So ho," said he, "you mean to cheat me do you?" at the same time +signifying his intention of having the horses go as fast as he liked. + +"The Lord help Fred and Ferd then, for Bill can't," was the mental +ejaculation of the negro as he saw the fire in his master's eye and +knew he must be obeyed. + +Still he managed to be as slow as possible, insisting that "Ferd +allus had to drink two buckets and a half, or he wan't wutha dime," +adding in a conciliatory tone, that "with two buckets and a half in +him he'd run like lightnin'." + +Very impatiently Mr. Delafield waited for the disappearance of the +requisite amount of water, consulting his watch, counting the +minutes, and at last remarking that it took Ferd a wonderful while to +drink. + +"That's 'case he's sich a 'strordinary beast every way," answered +Bill, who for some little time had been holding an _empty_ bucket to +the horse's mouth. + +He was going to replenish a third time when his master ordered him +back, telling him he could wait no longer; with another glance at his +watch, he entered the carriage, while Bill, loudly lamenting the half +bucket, without which Ferd would surely die, mounted the box, where +he spent quite a while in comfortably disposing of his long, lank +limbs and in adjusting his palmleaf hat. + +"Go on, you rascal," shouted Mr. Delafield, beginning to lose his +temper; and gathering up the reins, Bill whistled to the spirited +animals, who dashed off at a far greater speed than their driver +thought was at all conducive to their well being. + +"Hold on dar, Ferd! Stop dat foolin', will you, Fred! Easy dar, +both on you, for you come mighty nigh histin' me off de box!" + +This last was said quite loud for the benefit of Mr. Delafield, who, +perceiving that their speed had slackened, for they were well trained +and readily obeyed Bill's voice, called out, "Drive faster, I tell +you. Give them the ribbons, and let them run." + +"Lor' a'mighty," answered Bill, now coming to a dead halt in order +that his master might be better impressed with what he said. "You +don't understand hoss flesh. At this rate you kills 'em in less than +no time. Ferd never 'ill stan' it with them two buckets of water, +'case you see how shakin' him up dis way dey'll get bilin' hot and +nobody can live with boilin' water in 'em." + +Provoked as he was, Mr. Delafield could not repress a smile at the +subterfuges of Bill to spare his horses, but he bade him drive on, +saying, however, that he need not drive them at the top of their +speed immediately, as they would be more likely to give out, "but +after a mile or two," he continued, "put them through with the whip +if necessary." + +"Lor, mars'r," answered Bill from the box, without moving an inch, "I +never tache them with a whip in de world. Fred would jump clar out +of his skin. All dey want to make 'em kill deyselves is a loose rein +and a whistle--so." + +Suiting the action to the word, he whistled long and loud, whereupon +the horses started forward as if a volley of artillery had been fired +at their heels, while mingled with the roll of the wheels, Mr. +Delafield heard the distressed Bill, saying, "Whoa, dar, Ferdinand, +can't you whoa when I tell you. Think of the bilin' water, and keep +easy. Come Frederic, you set him a 'xample. That's a good boy, no +'casion for all dis hurry, if we misses one train we catches another. +All de same thing. We ain't chasin' a runaway gal, as I knows of." + +After a little he succeeded in stopping them, and for the next ten or +fifteen minutes they proceeded on rather leisurely, and Bill was +beginning to think his master had come to his senses, when he was +startled with the stern command, "Let them run now as fast as they +will. Don't check them at all until we reach the dépôt." + +Accordingly, for a mile or so the horses rushed on at headlong speed, +Bill sympathizing with them deeply and mentally promising himself "to +tend 'em mighty keerful to pay for this." + +At last, when he thought it safe to do so, he held them in, taking +the precaution, however to say aloud, "Get along dar, Ferd--none your +lazy tricks here when mars'r's in sich a hurry. Can't you get along +dar, I say. An' you, Fred, wake up yer bones to de merits of de +case." + +But if in this way he thought to deceive the resolute man inside he +was mistaken. Perceiving that their speed was considerably +slackened, and hearing Bill loudly reproach the horses for their +laziness, Mr. Delafield softly opened the carriage door, and leaning +out, learned the cause of the delay. Bolt upright upon the box, with +his brawny feet firmly braced against the dash-board so as to give +him more power, sat Bill, clutching the reins with might and main, +for the horses' mettle was up and it required his entire strength to +keep them from running furiously! All this time, too, the cunning +negro kept chiding them for their indolence in moving so slowly! + +"Bill," said Mr. Delafield, sternly, "stop the carriage instantly." + +"Lord a massy, mars'r," exclaimed the frightened Bill. "You almost +skeered me off de box. Ferd won't get along nohow. I tells him and +I tells him how you're in de hurry--don't you mind how I keeps +telling him to get along, I reckons he wants dat t'other half bucket +of water." + +"I understand you perfectly," said Mr. Delafield, alighting from the +carriage, and to the utter astonishment of Bill, mounting the box and +taking the reins in his own hands. "I understand your tricks, and +for the rest of the way I shall drive myself!" + +Rolling his eyes wildly in their sockets, the crestfallen Bill folded +his arms and resigned the horses to their fate, saying mentally, "I +shall war mournin' for 'em, I shall, and he may help hisself." + +Over rough and stony places--over smooth and sandy roads--over hills, +over plains--through the woods, through the swamps, and through the +winding valleys, on they sped like lightning, the excited horses +covered with foam, their driver stern, silent and determined, while +poor Bill, with the perspiration streaming down his shining face, +kept up a continued expostulation, "Now, mars'r, for de dear Lord's +sake, stop 'em 'fore dey draps down dead. Look at de white specks +all over Ferd's back--he'll never stan' it without dat t'other half +bucket. You kills 'em sartin, and dar goes a thousand dollars, smack +and clean." + +But Bill's entreaties were all in vain, and his distress was at its +height, when fortunately his thoughts were diverted in another +channel. At a sudden turn of the road a gust of wind lifted the old +palmleaf from his woolly head, and carried it far away. "Now, dear +Mars'r," said Bill, laying his hand on that of Mr. Delafield, "you'll +sartin let 'em breathe while I picks up my hat, 'case you see how'll +you look gwine into town wid a bareheaded nigger. In de Lord's name, +stop," he continued, as he saw in his master no signs of relenting. + +Glancing over his shoulder Mr. Delafield saw the hat away over the +fields, and quietly taking a bill from his pocket and placing it in +the negro's hand, he replied: "That will buy you five such hats." + +"Yes, but de hosses, lor' a mighty, de hosses!" exclaimed Bill almost +frantically. "Don't you see Ferd is gwine to gin out?" + +Mr. Delafield feared so, too, and more to himself than to his +servant, he said, "perhaps the cars will be behind time, they usually +are." + +Without considering the consequences, Bill answered, "No, they won't; +case I hear how they hired a tarin' Yankee for an _engine_, and he +drives all afore him--gits ahead of de time and all dat." + +The next minute he repented a speech whose disastrous effects he +foresaw, and he was about to deny it as a fabrication of his own +brain, when his master, who really saw signs of lagging in the +nervous, fiery Ferd, said, "Bill, you have a peculiar whistle with +which you spur up the horses--make it now; Ferd has run himself +almost down." + +"De Lord have massy on us," groaned Bill, wiping away a tear; then, +as Mr. Delafield repeated his order, he said, in a whining tone, +"Can't, mars'r, nohow; case you see my throat is dreffle sore, ridin' +barheaded so in the breeze which you kicks up--can't, nohow." + +"But you must," persisted Mr. Delafield. + +Bill still refused, until at last, as they approached the town, they +heard a heavy, rumbling sound. It was the roll of cars in the +distance, and starting up, Mr. Delafield seized the negro by the +shoulder and in thunder tones called out, "Whistle!" + +"Lord, mars'r, I will, I will," gasped Bill, terrified at the fiery +gleam of his master's eye, and from his mouth there issued a most +unearthly sound, which, mingled with the shriek of the fast coming +engine, urged on the jaded horses to one more desperate effort. + +A few more mad plunges and they reached the dépôt, covered with foam +and frothing at the mouth, just as the train was moving slowly away. +With one pitying farewell glance at his dying grays, Mr. Delafield +exclaimed, "Cut the harness instantly," and then with a bound sprung +up. on the platform, which he reached just as Bill called after him +in mournful accents, "Ferd's dead, mars'r, Ferd is," while, mingled +with the roar of the machinery he caught the faint echo of something +about "t'other half bucket of water!" + +But little cared he for that. Rosa Lee was to be overtaken, and to +accomplish this, he would willingly have sacrificed every horse of +which he was owner, even were they twice as valuable as the dappled +grays. + +So, wishing him a successful journey, and leaving him on the same +seat with a Yankee pedler, who saw him when he came up and "_guessed_ +he was after a runaway nigger," we return for a moment to Bill, who +with tears streaming from his eyes, watched the struggles of Fred +until the noble animal was dead, bringing him water which he vainly +coaxed him to drink, while the bystanders, who crowded around, asked +him innumerable questions as to why they drove so fast and where his +master was going. + +To the first Bill could not reply, but to the last he promptly +answered, as he patted the remains of the departed Ferdinand, "Gwine +to the _devil_, in course! Whar you spect a white man to go, what +treats hosses in dis kind of style, won't let 'em hev all the water +dey wants and drives 'em till dey draps dead in der tracks." + +The story of the half bucket was duly rehearsed, Bill firmly +believing that if Ferd had drank it, he would undoubtedly have lived +"dis minit and been as spry as a cricket." "But now he's dead and +Fred, too," continued the negro, as the latter ceased to move. "Sich +another span of hosses, thar ain't in all Georgy," and laying his +black face upon the neck of the insensible Ferd, the negro cried like +a child. + +"There is one comfort, at least, my boy," said a gentlemanly looking +man, who stood near and who knew Mr. Delafield, "your horses didn't +suffer, for they were too much excited." + +This in a measure consoled Bill, who, wiping his eyes, asked what he +was to do with them, saying he "never could dig thar grave." + +"My negroes shall do it for you," answered the stranger, and in a +short time several stalwart men were busy in an adjacent field making +a grave for the dappled grays, which they carefully buried, while on +a stump, with his head resting on his knees, sat Bill as chief +mourner. + +"I wish I knew a pra'r," he whispered to himself, "for if ever hosses +'sarved it they do;" but the rude African had never prayed since he +was a little child, and thinking himself too old to begin now, he +rose up from the stump, just as his companions, having finished their +task, were beginning to ridicule his bare head, telling him he must +have an unkind master, judging from his own appearance and the sad +fates of the horses, while one of them advised him to run away. + +This was touching Bill in a tender point, for though he had loved the +horses much, he loved his master more, and he would not hear him +censured; accordingly he retorted petulantly that thar warn't a +better master in all Georgy than mars'r Dick, nor a richer one +neither,--and 'twan't nobody's business if he killed five hundred +horses--he could afford it--'twan't as though he was poor and owned +nothin' but a few _low trash_ like the "'Gusty niggers!" + +This insinuation the "'Gusty niggers," chose to resent as an insult, +and a regular negro fight ensued, in which Bill, being the weaker +party, came off rather badly beaten, his face being scratched in +several places, while his pants received a huge rent, which in no +wise tended to improve his personal appearance. Matters being at +last amicably adjusted, the victorious party returned home, while +Bill, who had frequently been in Augusta with his master, wended his +way to a hatter's shop, where he soon made himself the owner of a +second-hand beaver, which at his request was ornamented by a weed of +crape as a badge of mourning for his favorite steeds. Then seeing +that the carriage was safely stowed away, he started on foot for +home, stopping at the negro quarters of almost every plantation to +relate his wonderful adventures. As he was perfectly trusty and +faithful, he was always allowed to carry a pass by his good-natured +master and thus he found no difficulty in his journey, which he took +quite leisurely, never reaching Sunny Bank until the close of the +second day after the one on which he had left it. + +In the meantime Mr. Delafield, with closely knit brows and compressed +lip, his usual look when he was in deep thought, sat musing of the +time when Rosa Lee would be his wife, while at his side the Yankee +pedler, with his basket of essence carefully stowed under the seat, +was casting curious glances at his companion, whose history he was +desirous of knowing. But there was something in Mr. Delafield's +appearance which forbade familiarity, so for once the loquacious +Yankee was silent. + +They were now about half way between Augusta and Charleston and going +at great speed, when suddenly at a short curve there was a violent +commotion--the passengers were pitched forward and backward, while +the engine plunged down a steep embankment, throwing the train from +the track and dragging after it the baggage car, which in some way +became detached from the rest. The new "Yankee engineer" was a +darling, reckless fellow, who at the North had been discharged for +carelessness, and had come to try his fortune at the South. +Fortunately no one was seriously hurt except Mr. Delafield, whose +injuries were simply _mental_, as he knew this accident would +probably detain them for many hours. In a perfect storm of +excitement he stalked up and down the track, asking the conductor +every few minutes how long it would probably be before they could go +on, and at last growing so dark in his face that the Yankee, after +looking over his essence basket and finding but few of his bottles +broken, ventured to say, "Now, _Squire_, don't git mad at a feller +for askin' a sassy question, but I raley du want to know if there +ain't a little atom of black blood in you?" + +"Very likely," answered Mr. Delafield; while the Yankee, now that the +ice was broken, continued to ply him with questions, which, though +very annoying to the haughty Southerner, tended to relieve in a +measure the tediousness of waiting. + +The sun had long been set and the stars were shining brightly ere +they were able to proceed, and it was after midnight when they at +last reached Charleston. Driving immediately to the landing, Mr. +Delafield to his great joy found that the steamer bound for New York +still lay at the wharf and would not start until morning. But was +Rosa Lee on board? That was a question which puzzled him, and as +there was no way of satisfying himself until morning, he sat down in +one of the state-rooms and rather impatiently awaited the dawn of day. + +* * * * * * + +The hurry--the confusion--and the excitement of starting was over. +We were out upon the deep blue sea, and from the window of my +state-room I watched the distant shore as it slowly receded from +view, and felt that I was leaving the land of sunlight and of +flowers. Notwithstanding the fatiguing journey of the previous day, +I was better this morning than I had been for many months before, for +I had slept quietly through the night. + +An hour or two after breakfast Charlie came to me with a very +peculiar expression on his face and asked me to go upon deck, saying +the fresh breeze would do me good. I consented willingly, and +throwing on my shawl and a simple Leghorn flat which had been of much +service to me at Cedar Grove, and which Mr. Delafield had often said +was very becoming, I went out with Charlie, who led me to the rear of +the boat, where he said we were not so liable to be disturbed. +Seating me upon a small settee he asked to be excused for a few +moments, saying I should not be long alone. The motion of the boat +produced a slight dizziness in my head, and leaning my elbow upon the +arm of the settee I shaded my eyes with my hand and sat lost in +thought until I heard the sound of a footstep. + +"It was Charlie," I said, so I did not look up, even when he sat down +by my side and wound his arm around me, wrapping my shawl closer +together, oh, so gently! "Charlie is very tender of me since my +sickness," I thought, and much I loved that he should thus caress me. +It thrilled me strangely, bringing back to my mind the night when I +sat in the vine-wreathed arbor, where I should never sit again. + +For a moment there was perfect silence and I could hear the beating +of Charlie's heart. Then leaning forward and removing my hand from +my eyes, he pressed a kiss upon my lips and whispered as he did so, +"_My own Rose!_" + +Once, when I was apparently dying, the sound of that voice had called +me back to life, and now with a cry of joy I sprang to my feet and +turning round, stood face to face with _Richard Delafield_, who, +stretching his arms towards me, said, "Come to my bosom, Rose. +Henceforth it is your resting-place." + +The shock was too much for me in my weak state. A faintness stole +over me, and if I obeyed his command, it was because I could not help +it! + +When I returned to consciousness, Richard's arms were around me, and +my head was resting upon his bosom, while he whispered to me words +which I leave to the imagination, as I dare not give them to the +world, lest he (_Uncle Dick_ I call him) should be angry in his way, +and I have learned to be a very little afraid of him since that +morning when on board the steamer Delphine we sat and talked together +of the past. + +Wonderingly I listened while he told me how long he had loved me--how +once he had thought to tell me of his love, but the manner in which I +answered his leading question disheartened him, for he feared his +affection was not returned--how it had filled his heart with bitter +grief when he saw me about to marry another--how his sister had +deceived him or he should have spoken to me then--and how in a moment +of temptation when he stood over my pillow he had asked that I might +die, for he would far rather that death should be his rival than a +fellow man. Then as he thought how near I had been to the dark +valley he shudderingly drew me closer to his side and told me how he +had wondered at Dr. Clayton's leaving me so abruptly, and how +sometimes when a ray of hope was beginning to dawn upon him, it had +been chilled by my manner, which he now understood. + +"You cannot conceive," said he in conclusion, "what my feelings were +yester morn when I bade you adieu, nor yet can you comprehend the +overwhelming delight I experienced when I read that letter and felt +that you would at last be mine." + +When he had ceased to speak I took up the story and told him of all +my own feelings, and that nothing would ever have induced me to think +for a moment of becoming Dr. Clayton's wife, but the belief that he +was engaged to Ada, a story which I told him his sister affirmed when +I went to her for counsel. + +"And so Angeline played a double part," said he, sighing deeply; "I +never thought she could be guilty of so much deception, though I have +always known she was averse to my marrying any one." + +Of Ada he said that never for a moment had he been engaged to her. +"She is to me like a sister," said he, "and though I know she has +many faults, I am greatly attached to her, for we have lived together +many years. She was committed to my care by her father and I shall +always be faithful to my trust. And if, dear Rose, in the future, +circumstances should render it necessary for her to live with us, +shall you object? She cannot harm you now." + +He had talked to me much of his love, but, not a word before had he +said of my sharing his home at Sunny Bank, so I rather coquettishly +answered, "You talk of my living with you as a settled matter, and +still you have not asked me if I would." + +A shadow for a moment darkened his face, and then with a very +quizzical expression he made me a formal offer of himself and +fortune, asking me pointedly if I would accept it--and--and, well, of +course, I did what my readers knew I would do when I first told them +of the _dark man_ at the theater--I said _yes_, and promised to +return with him to Sunny Bank as soon as my health would permit, +which he was positive would be in a very few weeks, for he should be +my daily physician, and "love, he said, would work miracles." + +Thus you see we were engaged--_Richard and I_! + + + + +CHAPTER XXIX. + +HUMAN NATURE. + +The sun had set on Ceder Grove, and together on the broad, airy +piazza sat Mrs. Lansing and Ada, rather impatiently waiting for +Richard, whom they had not seen since he left them so abruptly in the +morning. Greatly relieved at the absence of one whom she had in a +measure dreaded as a rival, Ada began to hope that the conquest of +her guardian would now be a comparatively easy matter, and as she +knew the effect which a pretty face and a becoming dress had upon +him, she had spent a great deal of time upon this evening's toilet, +and looked unusually young and handsome in her pale blue tissue, with +her soft curls falling over her white uncovered neck. + +That day she had talked a long time with Mrs. Lansing, who had not +only expressed her willingness to receive her as a sister, but had +also promised to do whatever she could to forward the matter. +Believing Mrs. Lansing to have far more influence over her brother +than she really had, Ada began to entertain hopes of soon becoming a +bride, and when she thought no one could see her, actually wrote upon +a card, "Mr. and Mrs. E. Delafield," just to see how it would look! +It looked well, she thought, and smoothing from her brow a frown +which had been caused by her finding among her waving tresses a long +white hair, she went down to the piazza to await Richard's coming. + +"He has not been here since morning, and I am sure he'll come +to-night. You know he has latterly been a most constant visitor," +remarked Mrs. Lansing. + +"Yes, but possibly the attraction which kept him so much here is +gone," faintly suggested Ada. + +"Fie!" returned Mrs. Lansing, with a toss of her head. "I know +Richard better than that, and though he may at one time have felt a +slight interest in Miss Lee, I am positive 'tis nothing serious, or +lasting. Only think of it, Richard Delafield marry my _governess_, a +poor _schoolmistress_! What would his fashionable acquaintance in +Augusta and Charleston say, setting aside our friends in New Orleans!" + +And on the proud woman's face there was a sneer at the very idea of +her brother's thus disgracing himself. + +"Hark! I do believe he's coming," said Ada, as she heard approaching +footsteps, and she had just time to adjust her skirts gracefully when +there stood before her, not Mr. Delafield, but the servant to whom +had been intrusted the note for Mrs. Lansing. + +This the negro had entirely forgotten until it was recalled to his +mind by the continued absence of his master, whose return they had +confidently expected before night. Taking the note from his hand, +Mrs. Lansing hastily glanced at its contents, and then, with an +exclamation of surprise, handed it to Ada, who turned deathly pale as +she saw her new-born hopes crushed at once and forever; and if now +she clasped her hand upon her side, the action, was not feigned, for +a pain, which blistering could not heal, was indeed there--the pain +of wounded pride at seeing a humble, obscure girl preferred to +herself. For several minutes not a word was spoken, and then Mrs. +Lansing, who knew it would not be politic to quarrel with her +brother, said, "I am astonished at Richard's proceedings, but I +suppose there is no help for it, and we may as well make the best of +it. Miss Lee ain't the worst girl in the world. She had many +friends in the village--was well educated, and with a few lessons +from us on some points of etiquette she may do very well." + +"_Us_," angrily retorted Ada. "When _I_ teach Dick Delafield's wife +etiquette I shall be older than I am now." + +"And _that_ you would not care to be;" said Mrs. Lansing, a little +sarcastically. + +She was a woman, who, if essential to her own interest, could turn +with every breeze, and though she was not pleased with her brother's +choice, she did not deem it advisable to provoke his anger by +quarreling about it, for when once roused, but few could cope with +his resolute, determined spirit. Then too, Rosa Lee was yielding and +generous, and would not object even if her husband should bestow half +his fortune upon his sister; so after all it might be better to have +her the mistress of Sunny Bank than one like Ada, who was more +selfish and wanted everything for herself. Thus Mrs. Lansing +reasoned, coming at last to feel quite amiably disposed towards Rosa +Lee, whom she fully intended to manage in her own way, and she was +about making up her mind to write a kind, sisterly letter to said +Rosa, when her attention was attracted by a loud sobbing, and looking +round she saw Ada weeping violently. + +As well as she could love any one, Ada had loved her guardian, and +the knowledge that he was now lost to her, overcame her for a time, +and covering her face with her hands, she cried aloud. Mrs. Lansing +had never really loved in her life, so she could not appreciate the +feeling, and she made no effort to soothe the weeping girl who that +night wet her pillow with bitter tears, and who next morning looked +weary, pale and old, as she languidly took her seat at the breakfast +table. Still Ada was not one to love very deeply, and as on this +occasion her pride was touched rather than her heart, she ere long +grew calm, and with Mrs. Lansing wisely resolved to make the best of +it. Then, too, there arose the very natural desire to conceal from +Richard that she had ever cared for him, and to do this she thought +she must _pretend_ to be pleased with his choice. Accordingly when +Mrs. Lansing wrote to her brother, Ada inclosed a gilt-edged note, in +which she congratulated him upon his intended marriage, telling him +she had foreseen it from the first and ended by sending her love to +"_Rose_." Thus, because she thought it would be for her interest, +did Mrs. Lansing deem it best to change her tactics, while Ada was +too proud to evince any open hostility, though in her heart she hated +the future bride and lamented the fatality which had decreed that she +should be rivaled by "both of those Lee girls." + + + + +CHAPTER XXX. + +"THE SOUTHERN PLANTER'S NORTHERN BRIDE." + +Over the New England hills the hazy light of a most glorious Indian +Summer was shining, while the forest trees, in their gorgeous array +of crimson and gold, lifted their tall heads as proudly as if they +heard not in the distance the voice of coming sorrows, and the +sighing of winter winds. The birds had flown to their southern home +where I fondly hoped to meet them, for I was to be a bride--Richard's +bride--and the day for my bridal had come. We had been +everywhere--Richard and I--all over the old Meadow Brook farm, sacred +to me for the many hallowed associations which clustered around it, +and very, very dear to him because it was my childhood's home. So he +told me when we stood for the last time beneath the spreading +grapevine, and I pointed out to him the place where years before I +had lain in the long green grass and wept over the fickleness of one +who was naught to me now, save a near friend. + +Together we had sat in the old brown schoolhouse,--he in the big +armchair, and I--but no matter where _I_ sat when I told him of the +little romping girl with yellow hair, who had there first learned to +con the alphabet and to trace on the gaily colored maps the boundary +lines of Georgia, little dreaming that her home would one day be +there. Then when I showed him the bench where I had lain when the +faintness came over me, he wound his arm closer around me,--though +wherefore I do not know. Together too, we had gone over the old +farmhouse, he lingering longest in the room where I was born, and +when he thought I didn't see him, gathering a withered leaf from the +rose bush which grew beneath the window, and which I told him I had +planted when a little girl. + +Every woman, young and old, in the neighborhood and in the village +had seen him, either face to face or from behind the folds of a +muslin curtain, some calling him "black and ugly," while others +pronounced him "splendid," and all I believe united in saying that, +"Rosa Lee had done wonders, considering she had no great amount of +beauty to do it with!" + +Once, when a remark like this came to Richard's ear he smiled quietly +and said, "Rosa Lee is beautiful to me, for though her face may lack +perfect regularity of features and brilliancy of complexion, she has +beauty of a higher order, a beauty of the mind, which is seen in her +laughing blue eyes and sunny smile." + +Thus you see, my reader, that Richard thought I was handsome, while +strange as it may seem there were others who said so too, and even I +was sensible of a thrill of pride, such as I suppose conscious +_beauties_ feel, when I stood up before the mirror and saw how well I +looked in my bridal dress of satin and lace--his gift, but not the +same which he had purchased for me some months before. At first I +had proposed wearing the one intended for Dr. Clayton's bride, but +Richard would not suffer it, so I gave it to Lizzy, who, as soon as +_John Thompson_ was of age, which would be in January, would probably +have need of it! This same John was to be our groomsman and much he +amused Richard by telling him of the tall, hateful boy who had once +been a terror to a little schoolma'am thirteen years of age, who now, +with a heightened bloom upon her cheek and a strange light in her +eye, stood waiting the summons to the parlor below. It came at last, +and as I laid my hand on Richard's arm he imprinted a kiss upon my +lips, "the last," he said, "he should ever give to Rosa _Lee_." + +Of what came next I have only a faint remembrance. There was a +rustling of satin upon the narrow staircase, down which Lizzie and I +went a little in advance of Richard and John Thompson, the latter of +whom said something in a low tone about _hoops_ and the space they +occupied! this remark shocked _me_ inexpressibly, but Richard didn't +seem to mind it at all. As we passed the front door, the cool night +wind (for it was evening) blew over my face, reminding me of the +South, it was so soft and balmy. When we entered the parlor, I was +conscious of a goodly number of eyes fixed upon me, and as I crossed +over to a vacant spot under the looking-glass I heard more than one +say in a whisper, "Isn't she pretty?" meaning Lizzie, I suppose! +Then a man, whom I recognized as the new Episcopal clergyman (I +believe I've never said that Richard was an Episcopalian) stood up +before us and said something about "_You Richard_--and _You Rose_," +after which Richard placed a ring upon my finger, squeezing my hand a +very little as he did so. Then, followed a short prayer, in which I +fancied the minister made a mistake in our names, inasmuch as he +spoke of _Isaac_ and _Rebecca_ instead of _Richard_ and _Rose_! This +being done I glanced at the bridegroom. There was no scowl upon his +forehead now, and I could see the light shining out all over his face +as he bent down and gently whispered "_my wife_!" + +This dispelled the clouds at once, and as guest after guest crowded +around, offering their congratulations, while Charlie and John +Thompson vied with each other in repeating my new name, I began to +realize that I was no longer Rosa Lee, but _Mrs. Richard Delafield_. + + + + +CHAPTER XXXI. + +SUNNY BANK. + +For a few days we lingered at my mother's fireside, and then, with +the fall of the first snowflake, we left for our southern home; +Richard promising my mother, who was loth to give me up, that when +the summer birds came hack and roses were blooming again by the door, +he would bring his _Rose_ to breathe once more the air of her native +hills. We stopped at New York, Philadelphia, Baltimore and +Washington, and it was not until the holidays were passed that we +landed at last at Charleston and took the cars for W---- which we +reached about dark. + +With a loud cry of joy, _Bill_, who was waiting for us, welcomed back +his master, and then almost crushing my fingers in his big black +hand, said, with a sly wink, which he meant should be very +expressive, "I know, now what mars'r kill dem hosses for!" at the +same time making some apology for the really sorry looking animals he +was compelled to drive in the place of the deceased Ferdinand and +Frederic. As we drove through the town I could not help contrasting +my present feelings with those of the year before, when I thought I +was leaving it forever. Then, weary, sick and wretched, I had looked +through blinding tears towards Sunny Bank, which was now my home, +while at my side, with his arm around me, was its owner--my husband. + +"You tremble, Rose," said he, as we drew near the house, and he bade +me be calmer, saying the meeting between myself and his sister would +soon be over. + +But it was not that which I dreaded. It was the presentation to his +servants, to whom I bore the formidable relation of mistress, and for +whose good opinion I cared far more than I did for that of the +haughty Mrs. Lansing. Something like this I said to Richard, who +assured me that his household would love me because I was _his_ wife, +if for no other reason, and thus I found it to be. As we drove into +the yard, we were surprised at seeing the house brilliantly lighted, +while through the open windows forms of many persons were seen moving +to and fro. + +In a displeased tone of voice Richard said, "It is Angeline's work, +and I do not like it, for you need rest, and are too much fatigued to +see any one to-night, but I suppose it cannot be avoided. Ho, Bill," +he called to the driver, "who is here?" + +"Some de quality," answered Bill, adding that "Miss Angeline done +'vite 'em to see de bride." + +"She might at least have consulted my wishes," said Richard, while my +heart sank within me at being obliged to meet strangers in my jaded +condition. + +Mrs. Lansing, it seems, had in her mind a new piano for Lina, their +present one being rather old-fashioned, and as the surest means of +procuring one she thought to please her brother by noticing his +bride. So, in her zeal, she rather overdid the matter, inviting to +Sunny Bank many of the villagers, some of whom were friendly to me +and some were not; though all, I believe, felt curious to see how the +"Plebeian Yankee" (thus Ada termed me) would demean herself as the +wife of a southern planter. + +Dusky faces, with white shining eyes, peered round the corner of the +building as the carriage stopped before the door, and more than one +whisper reached me. "Dat's she--de new Miss, dat mars'r's liftin' so +keerfully." + +Upon the piazza stood Mrs. Lansing, her face wreathed in smiles, +while at her side, in flowing white muslin, were Ada and Lina, the +former of whom sprang gaily down the steps, and with well feigned joy +threw herself into the arms of her guardian, who, after kissing her +affectionately, presented her to me, saying, "Will Ada be a sister to +my wife?" + +"Anything, for your sake," answered Ada, with rather more emphasis on +_your_ than was quite pleasing me. + +Mrs. Lansing came next, and there was something of hauteur in her +manner as she advanced, for much as she desired to please her +brother, she was not yet fully prepared to meet me as an equal. But +Richard knew the avenue to her heart, and as he placed my hand in +hers, he said, "For the sake of Jessie you will love my bride, I am +sure." + +It was enough; Jessie was forgotten by many who had wept bitterly +when first they heard the sad news of her death, but in the mother's +heart there was an aching void, and as if the gentle, blue-eyed child +were pleading for me from her little grave, the proud woman's eyes +were moist with tears as she said, "Yes, for Jessie's sake do I +l----" she paused, for with that sacred name upon her lips even the +could not utter a falsehood and say, "I love you," so she qualified +it, and after a moment continued, "I will learn to love you, Rose, +for such I know would be our angel Jessie's wish." + +From Lina I expected no demonstration. She was too selfish, too +listless to care for any one, so when she coolly shook my hand and +called me _Mrs. Delafield_, I was quite satisfied, particularly as +the next moment Halbert caught me round the neck, shouting out a +noisy, but genuine welcome to his "Aunt Rose," and telling me "he was +mighty glad I'd come back to stay for good." + +"You have quite a party," said Richard to his sister as we entered +the spacious hall, I shrinking behind him so as to hide myself from +the curious eyes which I knew were scanning my dusty traveling dress. + +"Only a few friends, who I thought would be glad to meet Miss Lee--I +beg pardon--your wife," she hastily added, as she saw the gathering +frown upon his brow. + +With a look in his eye which made her quail, he said, "Never make +that mistake again, Angeline." (And she never did!) "Rose is too +much exhausted to appear in the parlor to-night," he continued, as we +entered my room--our room--the pleasant, tasteful apartment, which I +once thought had been fitted up for Ada. "You ought to have had more +tact than to invite company on the first night of my arrival--when +you must have known how weary Rose would be. She don't look like +herself, so pale and wayworn," he continued, himself removing my +bonnet and tenderly stroking my aching head. + +Nothing would please Ada better than to present me just as I was, +pale and jaded, with dark rims beneath my eyes, induced by the severe +headache from which I was really suffering. It would show her own +charms to greater advantage, she thought, as she glanced at an +opposite mirror and saw the contrast between us. + +"Oh, Richard," she said pleadingly, "pray don't object to her going +down; it wouldn't be polite, and then they are all dying to see her." + +"Why then didn't they, some of them, improve the opportunity when she +was here before, and on show every day," said Richard, moodily. + +And Ada, forgetting herself, answered in a low tone, "Why, that's +plain enough, Mrs. Richard Delafield is a very different personage +from Miss Lee, _gov_"---- + +"_Ada!_" sternly interposed my husband, "never a remark like that in +my presence." + +"Why, Uncle Dick," said Ada, smothering her anger and winding her +white arms around his neck, "how you frighten me. I didn't mean +anything, only I do want Rose to go down, so much, can't you, dear?" +and she turned toward me. + +With her, I felt that it would hardly be polite to refuse, so I +replied that "after a cup of tea and half an hour's rest, I would try +to do so." + +Supper was brought to our room, the servant almost touching her knees +to the floor, so low was her obeisance to the "New Miss." As I have +once before remarked, my head was aching dreadfully, and as I looked +at the soft, downy pillows which lay piled upon the snowy bed in the +adjoining room, I thought how much rather I would throw myself among +them than join the gay company below. But it could not be, and with +something like tears in the sound of my voice, I asked Richard to +send up my trunks. + +Closely inspecting me for a moment, he answered, "There is no +necessity for you to dress. You look well enough just as you are, +and you must not fatigue yourself any more. I shall get you excused +in a little while, and sometime after you are thoroughly rested, +Angeline shall give a large party at her own house, where you'll have +an opportunity to display all the '_fixin's_,'" and he laughed, +thinking, I suppose, he had said something smart. + +My dress was a dark blue merino, trimmed on the basque and sleeves +with black velvet. It fitted neatly, and was, I knew, unusually +becoming; so after arranging my curls and donning a clean linen +collar, I took my husband's arm and went down to the drawing-room, +where I found about forty people assembled. With a few of them I was +already acquainted, while the majority were only known to me by +sight; for though I had often seen them at Cedar Grove, they had not +thought it worth their while to notice a mere governess. Now, +however, as Ada had said, matters were changed, and Richard +Delafield's wife could not be slighted with impunity. Consequently I +was for a time overwhelmed with compliments and attention; some with +whom I had never before spoken, expressing their delight at seeing me +back again, while others said that a _bride_ was just what was +wanting to give éclat to the winter gaieties. + +Close to my side kept Ada, assuming a kind of patronizing manner and +answering for me whenever she thought the conversation beyond my +depth. Of course she threw me quite in the shade, and in a measure +she had her reward, for she, as well as I, heard a lady, a stranger +in W----, say, "How much more beautiful Miss Montrose is than the +bride. I wonder Mr. Delafield did not prefer her." + +There was a look of exultation on Ada's face as her eyes met mine, +but it passed away as we heard the answer made by Miss Porter, a lady +whom Ada thought exceedingly aristocratic. "Yes," said she, "Miss +Montrose is rather pretty, but she is fading fast, and I suppose Mr. +Delafield preferred the freshness of youth to the decay of beauty, +and for my part, I approve his choice, and think her a very pretty +little creature." + +I glanced at my husband--he, too, heard the remark and it pleased +him, I knew, while Ada crossed over to the opposite side of the room +and I saw her no more, for Richard soon asked for me to be excused; a +request which the company readily granted, saying, "I must of course +be tired." + +It was late when Richard came up to our room, and I saw in a moment +that something was the matter, for his face wore the dark, hard look +it sometimes did when he was disturbed. I did not then ask the cause +of his annoyance, but afterwards I learned that the moment the guests +were gone, Ada, whose feelings were a good deal ruffled, not only at +the attention I had received, but also at the remark of Miss Porter, +commenced censuring my husband for having suffered me to appear in +the drawing-room in my traveling dress. "'Twas an insult to the +company," she said, "and they could excuse it on no other grounds +save the supposition that I was entirely ignorant of etiquette in any +form. I didn't blame her so much," said she, "for I suppose she +didn't know any better, but I was astonished at _you_." + +Ada had quite forgotten herself, or else she misunderstood the man +with whom she had to deal. Very quietly he listened, but the storm +was gathering within, and when she had finished, it burst upon her +with a vengeance; he bidding her never again, either in his presence +or the presence of any one, say aught disparagingly of his wife. +"Her actions shall not be questioned by you," said he, "and you +_shall_ treat her with deference, for in every respect she is your +superior, save that of _age_, and there, I admit, you have the +advantage." + +This decided the matter at once, for Ada was afraid of him, and +though she could not conceal her dislike from me, she was in his +presence always kind, considerate and sometimes even affectionate in +her demeanor towards me, coming at last to call him "Uncle Dick," in +imitation of Albert, and me "Aunt Rose," particularly if there were +any strangers present. + +The morning following my arrival I was formally presented to the +servants, who received me with many demonstrations of joy, the older +portion "bressin' de Lord they had lived to see Mars'r Richard look +so happy and peart like as he did with the new Miss." Only one eyed +me at all askance, and that was Aunt Hagar, the housekeeper, who saw +in me a rival--one who would henceforth wear jingling at her belt the +huge bunch of keys, which for so long a time had been to her a badge +of honor. Then, too, the old lady, like my other new relatives, had +some fears "that Miss Rose didn't 'long to the quality, and that +Mars'r Richard had done histed hisself down a peg or so by marryin' +one who was brought up in de free states, whar dar warn't nary nigger +to fotch 'em a drink of water or fan when de sun was roastin' hot." + +With a look of injured dignity, which made the steeple of a turban on +her head tremble, she undid from her waist the bunch of keys, and +offering them to me, said, "I 'spects these are yourn now." + +I drew back, for to me there was nothing pleasing in the idea of +being disturbed every time a lump of sugar, a piece of coal, or a pan +of flour was wanted, so I said, "If my husband is willing I'd rather +you'd keep them yourself, as I know you are trusty." + +Hagar's face brightened perceptibly and I am induced to think she +forgot in a measure my misfortune in having been born in a _free +state_! At all events I have not now a more devoted servant than +Hagar, who declares me to be a "perfect lady," and who has more than +once ventured the _treasonable remark_, that "if all de Free State +folks is like Miss Rose, she'll be boun' she'd like to live thar!" +Regularly each morning she comes to me and asks "what Miss would like +for dinner," and regularly each morning "Miss" answers, "Dear me, +Hagar, I don't know; get what you like;" feeling confident the while +that the program is already made out and that any material suggestion +from me would be superfluous. So much for mistress and slave. + +With his usual generosity, my husband made all of the negroes +presents in honor of his marriage; offering for Bill's acceptance a +silver watch, which he had purchased for him in Charleston. Taking +the timepiece in his hand, Bill examined it attentively, held it to +his ear, put it in his pocket, looked at the key, and then handing it +back to his master, said, "no 'fense, mars'r, but if you please +thar's somethin' I'd like better." + +"Very, well, what is it?" asked Richard; and Bill answered, "Why, you +see, Mars'r, how dem hosses, Fred and Ferd, has never had proper +'spect showed to thar memory. To be sure, I wars a weed on my hat +and I 'fused to jine in de dance t'odder night, but that's nothin'. +Ferd had too high blood in him to keer for an ole nigger's mournin', +and what I wants is for you _to paint de stable black_, and that I +reckons will show 'em proper 'tentions. What do you say, Miss Rose?" + +As the horses had fallen in my cause, I readily espoused Bill's +project for the novelty of the thing, if nothing else; and should any +one of my readers visit Sunny Bank, which I wish they may, they will +see the stables wearing a hue as dark as Bill himself, who has now a +pair of iron-grays, which he calls "Richard" and "Rose," +notwithstanding that both are of the masculine gender. These, +particularly the latter, are the pride of Bill's heart, and when the +year of mourning has expired, he intends, he says, to have the stable +painted "yaller," that being the color of a young girl who has lately +made sad havoc with his affections! + +Here I may as well say that Mrs. Lansing managed until she procured +the desired piano, which came in company with another, a much nicer +one, on the front of which was inscribed "Rose, from her husband." +In return for her brother's gift, Mrs. Lansing made a large party, +where I had an opportunity of wearing my bridal dress, together with +a costly set of diamonds, which I found upon my table, when I went up +to make my toilet. It did not need the simple word "Richard" on a +bit of paper to tell me whence they came, and the tears started to my +eyes when I thought how kind he was, while I was conscious of a glow +of pride, when I saw _little Rosa Lee_ flashing with diamonds, which +encircled her arms and neck, and shone among the curls of her hair. +Bertha, my tasteful waiting maid--for I am getting quite +southernized--pronounced me beautiful, as she gave the finishing +stroke to my toilet, while one, for whose judgment I cared still +more, and who all the time had been conning his evening paper, +apparently oblivious to the presence of white satin, point lace, +orange flowers and diamonds, responded, "Yes, Bertha, your young +mistress is beautiful." + +_Dress_ does make a vast deal of difference in one's looks, and if +that night two-thirds of the three hundred particular friends whose +hands I shook pronounced me "beautiful, handsome, charming, lovely," +and all that, it was owing chiefly, I think, to the fitness of my +robes and the brilliancy of my diamonds. These last were the subject +of much remark, they being the finest which had ever been worn in +W----, Ada _very good-naturedly_ saying, "she hoped my good fortune +wouldn't quite turn my head!" + +Mrs. Lansing's party was followed by many more, and ere I was aware +of it Mrs. Richard Delafield was quite a belle--what she said, what +she did, and what she wore being pronounced _au fait_ by the +fashionables of W----. Upon all this Ada looked jealously; never +allowing an opportunity to pass without speaking slightingly of me, +though always careful that Richard should not know of it. In his +presence she was vastly kind, sitting at my feet, calling me "Aunty," +and treating me as if I had been twenty years her senior. At first +she spent much more of her time at Sunny Bank than was at all +agreeable to me, and I was not sorry when a little incident occurred +which in a measure tended to keep her away. She had always been in +the habit of treating my husband with a great show of affection, and +now that he was, as she said, "an old married man," she seemed to +think it no matter how much she caressed him. Even _I_ dared not +seat myself upon his knee as coolly as she would, and her temerity +troubled me, particularly as I knew it was annoying to him. This I +must have manifested in some way, for one morning when, as usual, she +entered our room without knocking and perched herself on Richard's +knee, he pushed her off, saying, half in earnest, half in jest, +"Don't act so foolish, Ada, you make me sick, for now that I have +Rose to pet me, I can easily dispense with your caresses, which are +rather too much of a good thing." + +Ada was angry, and, with a little hateful laugh, she said, turning to +me, "_jealous_, I suppose, and have read your better-half a lecture +on propriety. When _I_ marry, I trust I shall have faith enough in +my husband's love for me not to care even if he does chance to look +at some one else." + +I knew Richard would vindicate my cause, so I remained silent while +he answered, "You do Rose injustice, for never have we exchanged a +word concerning the manner you have assumed towards me, and which I +should suppose your own sense of propriety would condemn. Were you +my wife, 'twould be different." + +"Your wife," interrupted Ada, with bitter scorn, "I am not your wife, +thank fortune, neither did I ever aspire to be, and I have yet to see +the man whom I would for a moment think of marrying." + +There was not the slightest cause for this speech, but Ada was angry; +and, as if to exasperate her still more, Richard coolly asked, +"Didn't you think of marrying _Herbert Langley_ when you engaged +yourself to him?" + +He had heard the whole story at Meadow Brook, but this was the first +time he had hinted it to Ada, Who turned very pale and without +another word left the room, going back to Cedar Grove, where for +three weeks she pouted and cried alternately. At the end of that +time, however, she concluded it better to "make up:" so she wrote a +note to us both, asking my pardon for her rudeness and begging my +husband to forgive her for the many falsehoods she had told +concerning her engagement with Herbert, which she now frankly +confessed. Of course we forgave her, and as she was not one who +remembered anything long, she soon began to visit us as of old, +though she no longer sat on my husband's knee, or wound her arms +around his neck. His rebuke did her good, and she profited by it, +while the fact that he was fully aware of the deception she had +practised tended to humble her, and on rainy days, when Richard was +necessarily away from home, I found her quite an agreeable companion. + +Thus the winter and spring passed away, and my mother's letters began +to grow urgent for my return, but for various reasons Richard did not +think it advisable for me to undertake so long a journey, and as +Sunny Bank was all the world to me, I very cheerfully consented to +wait until another season ere I visited my New England home. About +this time I was again seized with my olden desire for authorship, +induced in a measure by my knowing how much Mrs. Lansing reverenced +anything which savored of a book-writer. To be an _authoress_, then, +and make her proud to own me as her sister, was a subject over which +I grew pale and "nervous," Richard said, while the negroes called me +"fidgety" and wondered "what done ailded Miss Rose." At last, after +many wakeful nights and restless days, after sick headaches, nervous +headaches, and all kind of headaches, the plan was marked out for a +story. _I_ would be the heroine myself and give to the world as much +of my history as I thought proper, and if I failed--if no railroad, +steamboat, or stagecoach passenger ever pointed me out as "the woman +who wrote that book," or if my publishers "respectfully declined" +another bearing my signature, I thought I should still have the +satisfaction of knowing I had tried to benefit the world, and I felt +almost sure that in Meadow Brook at least there were people stupid +enough to buy my book and possibly to like it, just because little +Rosa Lee, who used to climb fences and hunt hen's eggs with them in +her childish days, had written it. So, one sunny morning in June, +when my husband had left me to be gone for two weeks, I shut myself +up in my room, donned a loose wrapper, tucked back my curls, opened +my writing desk, took out a quire of foolscap, and had just written +"MEADOW BROOK," when the bell rang and Bertha announced "a lady in +the parlor." With a deep sigh, as I thought how "WE writers disliked +to be disturbed," I arranged my curls, resumed my cambric morning +gown, and went down to receive my visitor, telling her that I was +_very_ well, that the weather was _very_ warm, that I expected to be +_very_ lonely without my husband, that her bonnet was _very_ pretty, +that I didn't think negroes as annoying and hateful as she did, after +which she took her leave; and I went back to my room, this time +locking the door and writing the first chapter of my book before the +bell rang for dinner. + +To Bertha I imparted my secret, reading to her each page as I wrote +it, and though she was not, perhaps, the most appreciating auditor +one could have, she was certainly the most attentive and approving. +It is true she objected to my describing myself as such a homely +child. "Jest tell de trufe and done wid it," she said; whereupon I +assured her that I _had_ told the truth, and then she suggested that +in order to make amends for my ugliness I should represent myself as +having been "peart like and smart." So, if the reader thinks I have +made myself too precocious, the fault is chargeable to Bertha, for I +did it to please her! + +For two weeks I wrote, scarcely allowing myself a moment's rest, and +Bertha, when she saw how it wore upon me, began at last to +expostulate. "Thar wasn't no 'casion," she said, "to kill myself, +when thar was heaps 'o niggers kickin' round under foot, and if miss +'sisted on writin' a book, why didn't she make some dem lazy critters +do it for her!" + +At the end of two weeks Richard returned, asking me as he looked in +my face "what was the matter, and how I had spent my time?" + +Before I could answer, Bertha, who was quite incensed against my +book, said, "She's done writin' a spellin' book, or something and +sits up 'most all night. I tell her how 'twill kill her, but she pay +no 'tention!" + +The secret was out, and with many blushes I plead guilty, and +producing my manuscript, watched Richard while he read it. Over the +first chapter, where he thought I was going to die, he cried--or that +is, tears came to his eyes; the third he skipped partially, the next +entirely, and the next and the next (I hope the reader has not done +likewise); but when he found Dr. Clayton he read every word, his +forehead tying itself up in knots, which, however, cleared away the +moment he came upon himself at the theater, though I believe he +didn't feel much complimented by my description of his personal +appearance! + +There, just as _he_ was introduced, the story ended, and fortunate +was it for me that it did so, for he declared I should not write +another word after I got through with him; and I promised that I +wouldn't, mentally resolving that it should be some time before I +reached that point. This then, my reader, is the reason why I said +no more of him, when first I presented him to your notice, but left +him for a while in mystery. I knew Richard was anxious to hear what +_did_ become of himself, and I fancied that if I wrote considerable +before I said anything very definite of him, he would be more likely +to let me finish the book, as he would not wish me to waste so much +paper for nothing! And the sequel proved that I was right. +Regularly each day I wrote, Richard always stopping me the moment he +thought I was tired, and invariably breaking me off in the wrong +place, so if there should be any parts of my story which do not join +together smoothly, you may know it was there that Richard took my pen +from my hand, or hid the inkstand. + +Towards the middle of August, invitations came for us to attend a +large wedding in Charleston. I was exceedingly anxious to go, having +heard much of the bride, who was a distant relative of my husband, +and though both he and Mrs. Lansing raised every conceivable +objection to my leaving home, I adroitly put aside all their +arguments, and ere Richard fully realized that he had been coaxed +into doing something he had fully determined not to do, we were +rattling along in a dusty Charleston omnibus towards one of the +largest hotels, where rooms had been engaged for us. The morning +after our arrival, I went into the public parlor, and as I seated +myself at the piano I saw just across the room, near an open window, +a quiet, intelligent-looking lady, apparently twenty-six or +twenty-seven years of age, and near her sporting upon the carpet, was +a beautiful little girl, with flowing curls and soft dark eyes, which +instantly riveted my attention, they were so like something I had +seen before. + +At the sound of the music she came to my side, listening attentively, +and when I had finished, she laid one white chubby hand on my lap and +the other on the keys, saying, "Please play again, _Rose_ like to +hear you." + +"And so your name is Rose?" I answered, "Rose what?" + +"_Rose Lee Clayton_, and that's my new ma," she replied, pointing +towards the lady, whose usually pale cheek was for an instant +suffused with a blush such as brides only wear. + +I knew now why I had felt interested in the child. It was the +_father_ which I saw looking at me through the eyes of brown, and +taking the little creature in my arms, I was about to question her of +her sire, when an increasing glow on the lady's cheek and a footstep +in the hall told me he was coming! + +The next moment he stood before me, Dr. Clayton! his face perfectly +unruffled and wearing an expression of content, at least, if not +perfect happiness. I was conscious of a faintness stealing over me, +but by a strong effort, I shook it off, and rising to my feet, I +offered him my hand, which he pressed, saying, "This is indeed a +surprise, Rose--I beg your pardon, Mrs. Delafield, I suppose?" + +I nodded in the affirmative, and was about to say something more, +when another footstep approached, and my husband's tall figure +darkened the doorway. For an instant they both turned pale, and Dr. +Clayton grasped the piano nervously; but the shock soon passed away, +and then as friend meets friend after a brief separation, so met +these two men, who but the year before had watched together over my +pillow, praying, the one that I might live, and the other that I +might die. + +Wonderingly the little girl looked up into her father's face, and +pulling the skirt of my dress, said, "Who is the lady, pa? with the +pretty curls so much like mine?" + +Never before, I believe, did I like Dr. Clayton as I did at that +moment when I saw the deep tenderness which broke over his features +as he took his daughter in his arms, and pressing his lips to her +forehead, answered, "It is _Rosa Lee_, my child, the lady for whom +you were named." + +"Don't you love her, pa? _I_ do," she asked, stretching her little +fat arms towards me. + +I glanced at my husband--his brow was dark as midnight. I looked at +Dr. Clayton, there was a slight quivering of his lips, while his wife +was pale as a water lily, and then I burst into a merry laugh, in +which the gentlemen soon joined, though it would have puzzled us all +to have told at what we were laughing. + +After a few words of explanation as to why we were there, Dr. Clayton +suddenly remembered himself, and leading me towards the lady, +introduced her as "My wife, Mrs. Clayton." She had been living in +Florida with a cousin, at whose house they were married, about two +weeks before, and they were now on their way to Boston, stopping for +a few days in Charleston to see the city. I found her a very quiet, +sensible woman, but as different from Dell Thompson, or Rosa Lee, as +a person well could be, and I was wondering to myself how it was +possible for a man to love so many people of opposite temperaments, +when she said something about New England, and I asked if she were +ever there. + +"Oh, yes," she answered, "I was born there, in Wilbraham, Mass. I +was living with the grandmother of the first Mrs. Clayton at the time +of her death." + +In a moment it all came to me; Dell had told me of _Mabel Warrener_, +who had inherited her grandmother's fortune, and now she sat there +before me, Mrs. Clayton 2d. Surely the freaks of fortune are +wonderful! Naturally refined and intelligent, Mabel had employed a +part of her money in giving herself a good education, graduating at +Mount Holyoke Female Seminary, and going thence back to her home in +Wilbraham, which she had fitted up with much taste, and where she was +living when Dr. Clayton met her on his return from Georgia. Of her +then he only thought as of a pleasant, agreeable woman; but when +time, absence, and my marriage had softened the keenness of his +disappointment, he often found his thoughts wandering towards the +fair Mabel, who, upon inquiry, he learned had gone to Florida. Rose +needed a mother, and he needed a wife; so, after an interchange of +letters, he one morning started with his little girl for the "land of +flowers," where neither sickness, nor death, nor yet a Richard +Delafield; came between him and his bride. They seemed very happy, +for after a little Dr. Clayton recovered his equanimity, and appeared +perfectly natural. + +Not a word, however, did he say of the past, or in any way allude to +Georgia, except once when he asked me if I did not think _Rose_ +resembled Jessie in a measure. I had thought of the same thing, +though Rosa's eyes were darker and her hair more of a chestnut brown. +She was a sweet little creature, and if anything could have +reconciled me to being the wife of Dr. Clayton, it would have been +the fact that she was my daughter. But as I contrasted the two men, +as my eye fell on Dr. Clayton's handsome face and curly locks, and +then rested on the dark features and raven hair of Richard, I felt +that in him there was more of the true, the noble man, and my heart +warmly approved me for the choice I had made. + +Nearly all the morning we sat there talking on indifferent subjects, +and when dinner was over, Mrs. Clayton came to my room, staying a +long time, and gaining fast in my good opinion, when I saw how kind +and friendly she was. She had heard the whole story, for she told me +so, holding little Rose upon her lap and smoothing her silken curls. + +"We cannot all love the same person," she said in conclusion; "and I +am so glad you refused him, for otherwise he would not have been my +husband;" and her quiet eyes lighted up with a look of happiness +which plainer than words could express told me that she had brought +to Dr. Clayton no divided affections. + +At the making of my toilet for the wedding she was present, aiding +Bertha greatly by her own tasteful suggestions, and when at last I +was dressed with perfect childish simplicity, she ran for her husband +"to come and see if I didn't look pretty." + +"Mrs. Delafield was always pretty to me," was the doctor's answer, +and that was all he said. + +They were to leave early next morning before I would be up, and so +when the carriage was announced, we went to bid them good-by. + +"May I kiss your wife?" asked the doctor of my husband, as he held my +hand. + +"Certainly, sir," answered Richard, "an even exchange is always +fair," and instead of once, _he_ kissed the blushing Mabel twice, +which of course gave Dr. Clayton liberty to do the same by me. + +Suddenly remembering something which I had left in my room, I went up +for it, and on my way back glanced into the parlor, occupied by Dr. +Clayton. He was seated upon the sofa by the side of his wife, around +whose waist his arm was affectionately thrown, while partly on his +lap and partly upon that of her stepmother was little Rose, her long +eyelashes drooping sleepily over her eyes of brown. It was a +beautiful tableau, and whenever I think of Dr. Clayton now, it is as +I last saw him, happy and contented, for he has not only won a most +excellent wife, but also secured that $10,000 after all! + + + + +CHAPTER XXXII. + +NOVEMBER 25TH. + +DEAR READER, + +Just one year ago to-night the orange wreath and bridal veil were +twined among my curls, and with a loving heart I stood up before the +man of God and took upon myself the vows, which made me Richard's +forever. The orange flowers are faded now, and the bridal veil looks +soiled and worn; but the sunlight of happiness which shone upon, me +when first he called me his wife has grown brighter and brighter as +each day has unfolded to me some new virtue which I knew not that he +possessed when he became my husband. + +No shadow, however slight, has ever fallen between us, for though he +has a fiery temper and an indomitable will, they are both under +perfect control, and so much confidence have I in his love for me, +that should I ever in any way come in collision with his temper or +his will, I have faith to believe I could bend the one and subdue the +other. Every comfort and luxury which affection can dictate or money +procure has been gathered around me, until my home seems to me a +second paradise. + +The fervid heat of summer has passed, and the hazy light which +betokens the fall of the leaf has come. On the northern hills, they +say, the November snows have already fallen, but we are still basking +in the soft sunlight of a most glorious autumn; and as I write, the +south wind comes in through the open window, whispering to me of the +fading flowers, whose perfume it gathered as it floated along. Just +opposite me, in a willow chair, with her head hurled in a towering +turban of royal purple, sits Juno, a middle-aged woman, nodding to +the breeze, which occasionally brushes past her so fast that she +lazily opens her eyes, and with her long-heeled foot gives a jog to +the _rosewood crib_, wherein lies sleeping a little tiny thing which +was _left_ here five weeks ago to-day. Oh, how odd and funny it +seemed when Richard first laid on my arm a little bundle of cambric +and lace, and whispered in my ear, "Would you like to see our baby?" +She is a great pet, and should this book never reach so far as +Georgia, Mrs. Lansing, I am sure, will like me all the same, for her +words and manner have been very kind since the morning when I said to +Richard, "We will call our baby _Jessie_." + +So Jessie was she baptized, Mrs. Lansing's tears falling like rain on +the face of the unconscious child, which she folded to her bosom as +tenderly as if it had indeed been her own lost Jessie come back to +her again. Upon Ada the arrival of the stranger produced a novel +effect, overwhelming her with such a load of modesty that she kept +out of Richard's way nearly two weeks, and never once came to see me +until I was sitting up in my merino morning gown, which she had +embroidered for me herself. Ada has a very nice sense of propriety! + +But little more remains for me to say, and that I must say briefly. +I am determined to finish my story, and as my husband for the first +time since my illness has left me alone for an hour or two, I am +improving the opportunity, having first bribed Bertha to bring me my +writing materials, by promising her a dress which she has long +coveted. + +The royal purple turban by the window has become somewhat displaced +by the strong west wind, and now wide-awake, begins to grumble at +"Miss Rosy's _impudence_ in 'xertin' herself to write trash which is +of no kind o' count, and which no _human_ will ever read." + +I hope her prediction is a false one, for I have lately conceived the +idea of devoting the entire proceeds of this book to the benefit of +"_Rosa Lee_," who, of course, has no part in the $10,000 which her +father has married! + +There is a rustling in the crib--the baby is waking, and at my +request Juno brings her to me, saying as she lays her on my lap, +"She's the berry pictur' of t'other Jessie," and as her soft blue +eyes unclose and my hand rests on her curly hair which begins to look +golden in the sunlight, I too, think the same, and with a throbbing +heart I pray the Father to save her from the early death which came +to our lost darling--"Jessie, the angel of the Pines." + +ROSE DELAFIELD. + + + +FINIS. + + + + +THE CRIMINAL WITNESS. + +In the spring of '48, I was called to Jackson to attend court, having +been engaged to defend a young man who had been accused of robbing +the mail. I had a long conference with my client, and he +acknowledged to me that on the night when the mail was robbed he had +been with a party of dissipated companions over to Topham, and that +on returning, they met the mail-carrier on horseback coming from +Jackson. Some of his companions were very drunk, and they proposed +to stop the carrier and overhaul his bag. The roads were very muddy +at the time, and the coach could not run. My client assured me that +he not only had no hand in robbing the mail, but that he tried to +dissuade his companions from doing so. But they would not listen to +him. One of them slipped up behind the carrier, and knocked him from +his horse. Then they bound and blindfolded him, and having tied him +to a tree, they took his mail-bag, and made off into a neighboring +field, where they overhauled it, finding some five hundred dollars in +money in the various letters. He went with them, but in no way did +he have any hand in the crime. Those who did do it had fled, and, as +the carrier had recognized him as in the party, he had been arrested. + +The mail-bag had been found, as well as the letters. Those letters +from which money had been taken, were kept, by order of the officers, +and duplicates sent to the various persons, to whom they were +directed, announcing the particulars. These letters had been given +me for examination, and I had then returned them to the prosecuting +attorney. + +I got through with my private preliminaries about noon, and as the +case would not come up before the next day, I went into the court in +the afternoon, to see what was going on. The first case which came +up was one of theft, and the prisoner was a young girl, not more than +seventeen years of age, named Elizabeth Madworth. She was very +pretty, and bore that mild, innocent look, which we seldom find in a +culprit. + +The complaint against her set forth that she had stolen one hundred +dollars from a Mrs. Naseby; and as the case went on, I found that +this Mrs. Naseby was her mistress, she (Mrs. N.) being a wealthy +widow, living in the town. The poor girl declared her innocence in +the wildest terms, and called on God to witness that she would rather +die than steal. But circumstances were hard against her. A hundred +dollars, in bank notes had been stolen from her mistress's room, and +she was the only one who had access there. + +At this juncture, while the mistress was upon the witness stand, a +young man came and caught me by the arm. + +"They tell me you are a good lawyer?" he whispered. + +"I am a lawyer," I answered. + +"Then--oh!--save her! You can certainly do it, for she is innocent." + +"Has she no counsel?" I asked. + +"None that's good for anything--nobody that'll do anything for her. +Oh, save her, and I'll pay you all I've got. I can't pay you much, +but I can raise something." + +I reflected for a moment. I cast my eyes toward the prisoner, and +she was at that moment looking at me. She caught my eye, and the +volume of humble, prayerful entreaty I read in those large, tearful +orbs, resolved me in a moment. I arose and went to the girl, and +asked her if she wished me to defend her. She said yes. Then I +informed the court that I was ready to enter into the case, and I was +admitted at once. + +I asked for a moment's cessation, that I might speak with my client. +I went and sat down by her side, and asked her to state candidly the +whole case. She told me she had lived with Mrs. Naseby nearly two +years, and that during all that time she had never had any trouble +before. About two weeks ago, she said, her mistress lost a hundred +dollars. + +"She missed it from her drawer," the girl told me, "and she asked me +about it, but I knew nothing of it. The next thing I knew, Nancy +Luther told Mrs. Naseby that she saw me take the money from her +drawer--that she watched me through the keyhole. Then they went to +my trunk, and they found twenty-five dollars of the missing money +there. But, oh, sir, I never took it--and somebody else put that +money there!" + +I then asked her if she suspected any one. + +"I don't know," she said, "who could have done it but Nancy. She has +never liked me, because she thought I was treated better than she +was. She is the cook, and I was the chamber-maid." + +She pointed Nancy Luther out to me. She was a stout, bold-faced +girl, somewhere about five-and-twenty years old, with a low forehead, +small gray eyes, a pug nose and thick lips. + +"Oh, sir, can you help me?" my client asked, in a fearful whisper. + +"Nancy Luther, did you say that girl's name was?" I asked, for a new +light had broken in upon me. + +"Yes, sir." + +"Is there any other girl of that name about here?" + +"No, sir." + +"Then rest easy. I'll try hard to save you." + +I left the courtroom, and went to the prosecuting attorney and asked +him for the letters I had handed him--the ones that had been stolen +from the mail-bag. He gave them to me, and, having selected one, I +returned the rest, and told him I would see that he had the one I +kept before night. I then returned to the courtroom, and the case +went on. + +Mrs. Naseby resumed her testimony. She said she entrusted her room +to the prisoner's care, and that no one else had access there save +herself. Then she described about missing the money, and closed by +telling how she found twenty-five dollars of it in the prisoner's +trunk. She could swear it was the identical money she had lost, it +being in two tens and one five-dollar bill. + +"Mrs. Naseby," said I, "when you first missed your money, had you any +reason to believe that the prisoner had it?" + +"No, sir," she answered. + +"Had you ever before detected her in any dishonesty?" + +"No, sir." + +"Should you have thought of searching her trunk, had not Nancy Luther +advised you and informed you?" + +"No, sir." + +Mrs. Naseby then left the stand, and Nancy Luther took. her place. +She came up with a bold look, and upon me she cast a defiant glance, +as much as to say "Trap me, if you can." She gave her evidence as +follows: + +She said that on the night when the money was stolen she saw the +prisoner going up-stairs, and from the sly manner in which she went +up, she suspected all was not right. So she followed her up. +"Elizabeth went into Mrs. Naseby's room, and shut the door after her. +I stooped down and looked through the keyhole, and saw her at the +mistress's drawer. I saw her take out the money and put it in her +pocket. Then she stooped down and picked up the lamp, and as I saw +that she was coming out, I hurried away." Then she went on and told +how she had informed her mistress of this, and how she proposed to +search the girl's trunk. + +I called Mrs. Naseby back to the stand. + +"You say that no one save yourself and the prisoner had access to +your room," I said. "Now, could Nancy Luther have entered that room, +if she wished?" + +"Certainly, sir. I meant no one else had any right there." + +I saw that Mrs. N., though naturally a hard woman, was somewhat moved +by poor Elizabeth's misery. + +"Could your cook have known, by any means in your knowledge, where +your money was?" + +"Yes, sir; for she has often come up to my room when I was there, and +I have given her money with which to buy provisions of marketmen who +happened along with their wagons." + +"One more question: Have you known of the prisoner's having used any +money since this was stolen?" + +"No, sir." + +I now called Nancy Luther back, and she began to tremble a little, +though her look was as bold and defiant. + +"Miss Luther," I said, "why did you not inform your mistress at once +of what you had seen without waiting for her to ask you about the +lost money?" + +"Because I could not make up my mind at once to expose the poor young +girl," she answered, promptly. + +"You say you looked through the keyhole and saw her take the money?" + +"Yes, sir." + +"Where did she place the lamp, while she did so?" + +"On the bureau." + +"In your testimony, you said she stooped down when she picked it up. +What did you mean by that?" + +The girl hesitated, and finally said she didn't mean anything, only +that she picked up the lamp. + +"Very well," said I. "How long have you been with Mrs. Naseby?" + +"Not quite a year, sir." + +"How much does she pay you a week?" + +"A dollar and three-quarters." + +"Have you taken up any of your pay since you have been there?" + +"Yes, sir." + +"How much?" + +"I don't know, sir." + +"Why don't you know?" + +"How should I? I've taken it at different times, just as I wanted +it, and have kept no account." + +"Now, if you had had any wish to harm the prisoner, couldn't you have +raised twenty-five dollars to put in her trunk?" + +"No, sir," she replied, with virtuous indignation. + +"Then you have not laid up any money since you have been there?" + +"No, sir--only what Mrs. Naseby may owe me." + +"Then you didn't have twenty-five dollars when you came there?" + +"No, sir; and what's more, the money found in the girl's trunk was +the very money that Mrs. Naseby lost. You might have known that, if +you'd only remember what you hear." + +"Will you tell me if you belong to this State?" I asked next. + +"I do, sir." + +"In what town?" + +She hesitated, and for an instant the bold look forsook her. But she +finally answered: + +"I belong in Somers, Montgomery County." + +I next turned to Mrs. Naseby. + +"Do you ever take a receipt from your girls when you pay them?" I +asked. + +"Always," she answered. + +"Can you send and get one of them for me?" + +She said she would willingly go, if the court said so. The court did +say so, and she went. Her dwelling was not far off, and she soon +returned, and handed me four receipts, which I took and examined. +They were all signed in a strange, straggling hand, by the witness. + +"Now, Nancy Luther," said I, turning to the witness, "please tell the +court, and the jury, and tell me, too, where you got the seventy-five +dollars you sent in a letter to your sister in Somers?" + +The witness started as though a volcano had burst at her feet. She +turned pale as death, and every limb shook violently. I waited until +the people could have an opportunity to see her emotion, and then I +repeated the question. + +"I--never--sent--any," she fairly gasped. + +"You did!" I thundered, for I was excited now. + +"I--I--didn't," she faintly uttered, grasping the rail by her side +for support. + +"May it please your honor, and gentlemen of the jury," I said, as +soon as I had looked the witness out of countenance, "I came here to +defend a youth who had been arrested for helping to rob the mail, and +in the course of my preliminary examinations, I had access to the +letters which had been torn open and rifled of money. When I entered +upon this case, and I heard the name of this witness pronounced, I +went out and got the letter which I now hold, for I remembered to +have seen one bearing the signature of Nancy Luther. This letter was +taken from the mail-bag, and it contained seventy-five dollars, and +by looking at the post-mark, you will observe that it was mailed on +the very next day after the hundred dollars were taken from Mrs. +Naseby's drawer. I will read it to you, if you please." + +The court nodded assent, and I read the following, which was without +date, save that made by the postmaster upon the outside. I give it +here verbatim: + + +"SISTER DORCAS: I cend yu heer sevente fiv dolers, which i want yu to +kepe for me till i cum hum. I can't kepe it heer coz ime afrade it +will git stole, don't speke wun word tu a livin sole bout this coz I +don't want nobodi tu kno i hav got enny mony. yu wont now wil yu. i +am first rate heer, only that gude fur nuthin snipe of liz madwurth +is heer yit--but i hop tu git red ov her now. yu no i rote yu bout +her. give my luv to awl inquiren friends, this is from your sister +til deth NANCY LUTHER." + + +"Now, your honor," I said, as I handed him the letter, and also the +receipts, "you will see that the letter is directed to 'Dorcas +Luther, Somers, Montgomery County.' And you will also observe that +one hand wrote that letter and signed those receipts. The jury will +also observe. And now I will only add: It is plain to see how the +hundred dollars were disposed of. Seventy-five were put into that +letter and sent off for safe-keeping, while the remaining twenty-five +were placed in the prisoner's trunk for the purpose of covering the +real criminal." + +The case was given to the jury immediately following their +examination of the letter. Without leaving their seats, they +returned a verdict of--"Not Guilty." + +The youth, who had first asked me to defend the prisoner, caught me +by the hand, but he could not speak plainly. He simply looked at me +through his tears for a moment, and then rushed to the fair prisoner. +He seemed to forget where he was, for he flung his arms about her, +and as she laid her head upon his bosom, she wept aloud. + +I will not attempt to describe the scene that followed; but if Nancy +Luther had not been immediately arrested for theft, she would have +been obliged to seek the protection of the officers, or the excited +people would surely have maimed her, if they had done no more. On +the next morning, I received a note, very handsomely written, in +which I was told that "the within" was but a slight token of the +gratitude due me for my effort in behalf of a poor, defenseless, but +much loved, maiden. It was signed "Several Citizens," and contained +one hundred dollars. Shortly afterward, the youth came to pay me all +the money he could raise. I simply showed him the note I had +received, and asked him if he would keep his hard earnings for his +wife, when he got one. He owned that he intended to make Lizzie +Madworth his wife very soon. I will only add that on the following +day I succeeded in clearing my next client from conviction of robbing +the mail; and I will not deny that I made a considerable handle of +the fortunate discovery of the letter which had saved an innocent +girl, on the day before, in my appeal to the jury; and if I made them +feel that the finger of Omnipotence was in the work, I did it because +I sincerely believe my client was innocent of all crime; and I am +sure they thought so too. + + + + + + + +*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 79070 *** |