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diff --git a/78927-0.txt b/78927-0.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..0256e89 --- /dev/null +++ b/78927-0.txt @@ -0,0 +1,821 @@ +*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 78927 *** + + + + + LITTLE BLUE BOOK NO. 1436 + Edited by E. Haldeman-Julius + + Strange Marriage Customs + + Leo Markun + + HALDEMAN-JULIUS PUBLICATIONS + GIRARD, KANSAS + + + + + Copyright, 1929, + Haldeman-Julius Company + + + PRINTED IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA + + + + +STRANGE MARRIAGE CUSTOMS + + + + +THE MATCHMAKER + + +Our young people seem to be fully capable of choosing their own +mates. At any rate, they feel that they are, and they deeply resent +interference on the part of others. Such a condition has not always +existed. It does not exist everywhere even now. + +For one thing, parental authority means comparatively little in +twentieth-century America. Mothers and, to a lesser extent, fathers, +are honored chiefly by the singing of sentimental songs and the giving +of useless presents on certain days of the year. In China, the worship +of parents and ancestors is still important. In New England, not many +centuries ago, it was a serious and sometimes a capital offense to +rebel against authority. In some of the most highly civilized countries +of ancient times, the paterfamilias had the right of life and death +over his offspring. His authority might last until his death. It was +usually unimpaired until the child was married. Then the girl became +the subject (under some codes, virtually the slave) of her husband. The +boy became the head of a new family, though he owed respect and perhaps +certain duties of obedience to his own father. + +With strong paternal or parental authority goes usually the privilege +of marrying off the children, whose tastes and inclinations may or may +not be consulted. Right now in the United States, in families of old +American stock, there are mothers strong-willed enough to impose their +notions of what constitutes a suitable husband upon their daughters. +“Mother knows best” in matrimonial as well as in other matters, and +is able to carry out her desires. Of course, the motives of the +domineering parent may be selfish or not. He or she may be unselfish +and still cause a calamitous marriage by bringing together young people +who are temperamentally unsuited for each other. On the other hand, +inexperienced boys and girls who are free to choose for themselves +often become the victims of an evanescent infatuation. From the point +of view of, say, Dorothy Dix, the moral is that parental experience +should generally be called upon for advice, though the absolute +veto, except as to children who are really too young to marry, is +hardly desirable. Granting this, it may still be argued that only the +companionate marriage offers a genuine solution to many problems of our +time. + +Of the general evolution of marriage I have already written, and here I +shall consider for the most part matters not discussed in Little Blue +Book No. 83. With the companionate marriage and other allied questions, +a number of Little Blue Book authors have dealt. It may be well to say +here, though, that unfamiliar and consequently strange marriage customs +should be interesting to us not merely as stray curiosities, but +primarily because they throw light on our own manners and morals. Rice +is thrown at our weddings without any magical intent, but still because +the showering of grain upon bride and groom has been at other times and +is in other lands considered a means of promoting fertility. We see +little of the chaperon, and when we do see her we hardly realize that +she takes the place of the duenna, the eunuch at the seraglio door, +and other guards charged with the duty of seeing that persons of the +opposite sexes not married to one another shall be kept apart. + +The matchmaker has his (or her) place in the economy of things when +young people eligible for marriage have insufficient opportunity to +meet each other socially, and especially when more or less complex +contracts dealing with economic goods, or with questions of precedence +and social status, are involved. Thus, the marriage of kings and +princes has often hinged upon delicate diplomatic negotiations. A +prince of Wales may dance with stenographers and flirt with actresses, +but is likely to marry a princess after consulting ministers of state. +He had better not fall in love with an Italian princess unless she can +be persuaded to become a Protestant or he is willing to renounce his +right to succeed to the throne. His limitation in this regard is set by +an act of Parliament. + +Pecuniary considerations have often been primary problems in amateur +and professional matchmaking. The connection between love and money +is an old one, though not one which existed at the earliest stages +of human development. Money was first used in a comparatively recent +period, and the objects of capital which it represents are little known +to simple savages. Whatever the nature of the tie men formed with women +when human beings first appeared may have been, we may be sure that it +did not depend upon the accumulation of goods. The marriage for money +must, then, be considered a by-product of civilization. + +So far as the matchmaker deals with money, he is an agent of a familiar +sort. For example, there are peoples among whom it is customary for +the father to think of his daughter as a piece of valuable property. +His whole interest is to receive as much as possible for her in cows +or weapons or silver. What his daughter will think of her husband is +for him a matter of no importance. The purchaser must be able to pay +for what he is getting, and he must be trustworthy if there are to be +deferred installments. The tribe or the community often limits the +circles from whom the husband may be drawn, but it may limit still more +the marketability of objects other than daughters. + +This is the extreme form of the economic motive in arranging matches. +When the husband is “bought,” and in most instances when a bridal price +is paid, the person or persons receiving the money pays some attention +to the desirability of the marriage from the points of view other than +the pecuniary one. The matchmaker consequently becomes something more +than a business agent. In fact, he often officiates by virtue of his +position. That is, he may act because he is a chief or a priest. Or he +may be a relative charged with this delicate duty. Whether or not he +receives any compensation depends upon the usages of the community. + +Newly married young women make up most of the matchmakers with us. To +be sure, cynics say that the sex as a whole is engaged in a conspiracy +to deprive bachelors of their freedom. When men who have just been +married talk to their friends who are still single about the advantages +of matrimony, it is sometimes assumed that they are motivated by +the desire to assuage their misery in accordance with the familiar +principle. However, the amateur matchmaker can derive no direct (at +least, no economic) benefit from his efforts in ordinary cases. Rather +he is confronted with the necessity of buying engagement and wedding +presents for the beneficiary (if you prefer, for the victim) of his +work. + +The two chief enemies of marriage are the religious ideal that there +is something holy about celibacy and the economic state in which a +wife or wives and their offspring are expensive to maintain. Among the +early Hebrews, neither the one nor the other existed. It was considered +a divine duty to “increase and multiply,” and wives and children +were ordinarily put to work at agricultural tasks. The position of +bachelors and spinsters consequently became anomalous, and matchmaking +was considered a meritorious act. The medieval and modern Jews have +been for the most part an urban people. This fact and their living +to a large extent in predominantly Christian communities has meant +the decline of polygyny among them, but orthodox Judaism still favors +fruitfulness. + +During the medieval period of oppression and massacres, it was all +but miraculous--some rabbis and ministers say it was only because +of the direct intervention of God--that the Jewish people survived. +Allowing amply for recruits from without, as of the Chazars, a Turkish +body living in what is now southern Russia, we must see that survival +depended upon fecundity. The personal hygiene of the Jews, it is true, +was better than that of their Christian neighbors; but we must not fail +to give due credit to the matchmaker. + +Perhaps only one Jewish youth survived in a town after a particularly +bloody massacre, and the nearest family of his faith was a hundred +miles off. It was, then, considered a particularly meritorious act of +piety to find him a wife. Soon there arose a professional class of +_shadkans_ or _shadchans_, who enjoyed a legal status at least as early +as the twelfth century. In the early days, these men were mostly rabbis +and persons engaged in the study of Talmudic law and theology. It was +considered improper for them to derive pecuniary benefits directly from +their learning, but the matchmaking profession seemed a dignified way +for them to earn a livelihood. Old scrolls record the fact that some of +the most famous rabbis of the Middle Ages were _shadchanim_. + +The matchmaker’s fee was usually a percentage of the dowry, which it +was to his interest to make as large as possible. After a time, the +haggling and indecorous competition which arose drove most of the +learned men out of the profession, which was no longer held to be so +honorable as in the earlier time. + +The _shadchan_ has survived among Jews to this day, chiefly in the +Slavonic countries and elsewhere among immigrants from them. In +old-fashioned families, the girls are not permitted to mingle freely +with boys. Negotiations for their marriage are carried on by the +parents, usually with the assistance of common friends or a matchmaker. +In America, the _shadchanim_ are mostly located in the East Side of New +York. They advertise in the Yiddish newspapers, announcing their office +hours and setting forth their ability to provide professional men, +businessmen and honest workingmen for maidens and widows. A matrimonial +bureau has recently been opened in a magnificent apartment house on the +Grand Concourse in the Bronx. Others are found wherever there are large +Jewish communities. + +The American-born Jew is not particularly likely to patronize the +professional matchmaker, since he can meet girls freely in dance +halls and in the homes of his friends, just as Gentiles can. There +are, indeed, young lawyers and physicians and dentists who appreciate +that their education entitles them to large dowries, and who feel +that they can find the best selection of beauty and the money that +goes with it by visiting a _shadchan_. There are more or less wealthy +Jewish merchants in small cities with daughters to marry off, but only +non-Jewish neighbors. It is the matchmaker who wages a vigorous war +against assimilation and for his commission. + +The _shadchan_ has often appeared in fiction, and almost always as +a comic character. It is his business to convince the prospective +bridegroom’s family and friends that he is in touch with the most +beautiful and desirable of all womankind. If she is hunchbacked, her +hump is ignored or else set forth as a slight curve which is but an +added embellishment. A first-rate matchmaker can convince a hesitating +swain that a one-legged girl is more desirable than she would have been +if God had given her two. + +There is an anecdote about a matchmaker who finally brought a modest +youth to be inspected by a beautiful virgin’s parents. Whatever +the young man said about himself, the _shadchan_ made out to be a +ridiculous understatement. Thus, “Well, I manage to eke out a living” +was followed by an indignant, “Why, he’s a millionaire!” “I come of a +pretty good fam--” was interrupted by “I tell you all his relatives are +great scholars.” Then the youth was unlucky enough to sneeze, and he +apologetically explained, “I got a little cold.” “Pfui,” shouted the +matchmaker, “a little cold! Why, he’s got consumption.” + +It would be unfair to suggest that all Jews look upon marriage as +a money-making venture, or that only Jews take such an attitude in +the countries of European culture. After all, matrimonial papers and +correspondence bureaus do flourish in the land of the kleagle, the +evangelist, and the holy King James Bible. The rich widow is held out +as a bait for the yokel’s ten cents in stamps, and sometimes for all +the money he has in the bank as well. + +In higher circles of society, Americans often purchase titles for +their daughters. I do not doubt that the heart of a baron or a marquis +can palpitate in honest and passionate love for a sugar or an asbestos +princess. It is convenient, though, that the _vons_ and _des_ do not +become similarly enamoured of vivacious Yankee misses whose pas do not +cut coupons and whose mas do not patronize the opera. + +It is hardly necessary for me to inquire into the morality of +marrying money. _Mores_ depend upon time and place. In Germany and +Austria-Hungary, before the Great War, it was expected that military +officers who were not independently wealthy should choose brides who +were. According to Bloch, the _Geldehe_ or marriage for money was +common also in the higher middle class and in the aristocracies of +noble birth and finance. The impoverishment of the nobility in several +European countries since the war and the rise of profiteers and +successful speculators anxious to win social prestige have operated in +many instances to make pecuniary considerations primary in marriage. +With the French, the _dot_ or dowry has been and still is very +important. + +Travelers have found matchmakers at work in Korea and Siam as well as +(among non-Jews) in a number of European countries. The go-between in +Mohammedan lands is usually an old woman. Westermarck lists a number of +peoples at low levels of culture who employ matchmakers. They include +a variety of Indian tribes in the two Americas, Philippine Islanders, +Formosans, Africans, and natives of the mountains in the north of India. + +It is a widespread custom, too, for the young man in love, even if he +is free to choose for himself, to ask his parents or other relatives +to do his wooing for him. A Koryak youth is expected to do this, but +he may declare his own intentions if the match he intends to make is +disapproved by his parents. In such case, he is not supposed to say +anything. Instead, he proposes by entering the house of his prospective +father-in-law and doing such of the housework as becomes a man in his +part of the world. It is good etiquette for the host to remain as +silent as he. + +Clearly, genuine or conventional bashfulness is at the bottom of +such a custom. Sexual modesty is, in fact, at least as common with +savages and barbarians as it is with civilized people, although the +manifestations of it are not entirely the same. Therefore, a matchmaker +may be required to bring together shy young people even if the economic +aspects of matrimony are simple. + + + + +CHILD MARRIAGES + + +In recent years, much publicity has been given to the prevalence of +infant and child marriages in India. This particular indiscretion of +Mother India is, at any rate, not very new. The Law of Manu, which was +established perhaps three thousand years ago, provides that a father +may marry his eight-year-old daughter to a man of twenty-four and his +daughter of twelve to a man of thirty. But, in truth, the usual age of +marriage for females has gone down in modern times, though it is now +tending to go up somewhat. + +It is the general opinion in the Orient that every able-bodied adult +should be married, and girls are held to be adult when they have +reached the age of puberty. The people of India, especially the Hindus, +feel that it is a disgrace for a girl to remain single after she is +twelve or thirteen. Of the unmarried females among them, only a very +small proportion are over the age of fifteen. A great many Hindu +girls become wives before reaching the age of five. While the average +marriage age for males is somewhat higher than that for females, it is +by no means unusual for infant boys to become husbands. + +The marriage of infants is not general everywhere in India, certain +regions in the center of the empire bringing up the average for the +country as a whole. It is confined almost entirely to the Mohammedans +and the Hindus, especially the latter. When we come to consider +children, girls over the age of twelve and boys over fifteen, the +matter is somewhat different. The Christians and the Animists of India +regard them as entirely ripe for matrimony. Child marriage is least +common among the Buddhists. + +When very young boys and girls are married, they do not ordinarily +proceed at once to live together as husband and wife. In this respect, +however, usage varies throughout the country, and there is no doubt +that cohabitation sometimes occurs before the wife has menstruated. + +Obviously, children who are married off long before reaching years +of discretion, sometimes before they have learned simple measures +of self-control, do not choose their husbands or their wives for +themselves. It may be that the desire of the parents to preserve +their authority in so important a matter is chiefly responsible +for maintaining the custom. There are other factors, some of them +historical. India was for many centuries the seat of devastating wars. +Now one and now another conqueror came into the land, and attractive +virgins made up an important part of the spoils. Married women were +less attractive and therefore more secure. + +Hypergamy, too, has probably played an important part in the +development of extremely early marriage. This requires girls to marry +into a higher sub-caste than their own, or at least forbids them to +marry into a lower sub-caste. By greatly narrowing the circle of lawful +bridegrooms, it stimulates foresight on the part of parents. The +fathers and the mothers of female children who disregard the rule are +themselves reduced in status. While boys and men are not allowed to +marry outside the caste, they may take girls from subdivisions lower +than their own without penalty. + +It naturally arouses pity in the hearts of Europeans and Americans to +see child brides of six or eight put through ceremonies of which they +do not understand the import and led into ways of living for which they +are evidently far too young. We are told about little girls nearly +fainting for lack of air while the wedding guests gather about to have +a good look. Still, the accustomed is seldom the horrible, and it is +improbable that the women of India resent the custom half so much as +the benevolent ladies from abroad do. + +To the imperialists who use child marriage as an argument in favor +of the maintenance of British rule in India, it may be apposite to +point out that the English have themselves practiced it even in what +we are wont to think of as modern times. From the thirteenth to the +seventeenth centuries, it was fairly common in the higher social ranks. +In 1564, a three-year-old boy was married to a girl of two. Neither +could do much talking, and the witnesses in whose arms they were held +during the ceremony made most of the responses for them. In Scotland, +it was not until 1600 that the age limit was set at fourteen for males +and twelve for females. It is at these points that the law of Great +Britain now sets the age of puberty, though a change is impending. + +When the diplomacy of Europe was chiefly a matter of negotiation +between monarchs, young princes and princesses were often used as +pawns. It sometimes happened that children were betrothed at two +or three to cement alliances or to consolidate realms. History has +carried down to us the tears of at least one young princess whose +mother flogged her for declaring that she did not like the man who had +been chosen as her husband and that she would not go to him under any +consideration. + +The age of consent in Great Britain and in most parts of the United +States was quite low until the second half of the nineteenth century. +This situation encouraged, if not child marriage, the exploitation +of girls by unscrupulous parents. Many children were prostitutes or +concubines. In the 1850’s, two thousand New York prostitutes were +asked, “How old will you be next birthday?” The answers ranged all the +way up to 77 years, but the most frequent answer was 20; 268 girls said +they were nineteen years old, 258 were or professed to be eighteen, 143 +said they were seventeen, 62 gave their age as sixteen, seventeen as +fifteen, and two as fourteen. It is highly probable that many of the +younger girls added to their actual years. Some decades later, there +were brothels in New York in which most of the prostitutes were only +ten or eleven. In the year of Our Lord in which I write, a reverend +gentleman resident in one of these United States has been sent to the +penitentiary for marrying a child of ten though already possessing a +wife several times as old. + +The average marriage age advances as we move from south to north. It +is higher in the city than in the country and among the educated than +among those who have little schooling. Puberty generally sets the lower +limit, for the marriage of children who have not yet reached it is +almost always treated as a mere betrothal. Perhaps we may set up the +generalization that the age of marriage tends to vary inversely with +the value attached to chastity and the fear that unmarried girls will +be unduly tempted. It is said that child marriage became commoner in +India after the Dravidians came in, bringing the custom of premarital +promiscuity with them. There is another factor, the value attached +by religion and current morality to sexual indulgence. The Israelites +glorified fecundity, the Mohammedans and the Hindus have attached +sanctity to acts that Christian preachers denounce as sinful. During +the Middle Ages, a pretty large part of the Christian population was +sworn to celibacy, while the men of Islam were marrying early and +often. Of course, there were many illegitimate births in western +Europe. Who knows, this fact may be responsible for the fact that +Christian civilization was not supplanted by the barbarous bathhouses +and libraries and laboratories of the dread worshipers of Allah. + +In medieval Europe, the apprentices had to defer marrying. The students +too helped to swell the ranks of the unmarried. However, the great bulk +of the population consisted of farm laborers, who could provide for +their wives about as well at sixteen as at twenty-six. Among the Jews +there were many students, but special provision was made for them. It +was usual for them to live at the expense of their fathers-in-law for +some time after the marriage. This custom was important a generation or +two ago, and no doubt it still survives in some Polish communities. + +The Industrial Revolution has raised the usual age at which Europeans +marry, and also it has increased the proportion of unmarried adults. +The average age of men and women marrying for the first time in England +and Wales between 1876 and 1885 was respectively 25.9 and 24.4, while +for 1906-1910 the averages were 27.2 and 25.6. However, the tendency +in Great Britain and in the United States is not toward a constantly +upward movement in these figures. Conditions which enable young people +to earn good wages bring them down. In the “upper” classes, marriages +are usually more retarded than in the “lower” ones. The higher +standards of living maintained by the former probably account for part +of the difference, although there is a counterbalancing element in +hereditary wealth: the rich man’s son seldom needs to worry about how +he is to support a wife, at least, if his father is satisfied with +his choice. On the other hand, he may wait until he has inherited the +family fortune before marrying the woman he wants. It may be that the +poor, who are generally accused of being improvident, prove the truth +of the charge by getting married while they are quite young. + +Schmoller has estimated that, under normal circumstances, about half +the population of a country would consist of married people, widows, +and widowers. This does not hold true of either Europe or the United +States, because many live and die single. Wherever law or custom fixes +monogamy as the only form of marriage, it is, indeed, inevitable +that there shall be either bachelors or spinsters, for the number of +marriageable males is never exactly equal to that of marriageable +females. The excess of females amounts, in Europe, to about three per +cent. Special conditions such as arise out of a great war make the +difference in numbers still greater. + +But there are bachelors as well as spinsters in Europe. There are monks +as well as nuns, unmarried rakes as well as prostitutes. In short, +what some are pleased to consider normal conditions do not exist. +According to the figures given by Iwan Bloch, the percentage of people +who have reached the age of fifty without marrying is 3 in Hungary, +9 in Germany, 13 in Austria, and 17 in Switzerland. For the period +1886-1890, the official statistics of England and Wales show that 60 +out of every 100 inhabitants over the age of fifteen were or had been +married. The number in Belgium was 56, the lowest in Europe. It was +61 in Germany, 62 in the United States, 64 in France, 76 in Hungary. +Of these, from eight to ten had been widowed. The variations from one +country to another point chiefly to economic factors. + +Feminism, or, wider than this, a general tendency arising out of the +constantly growing freedom and power of women, seems to be advancing +the marriage age and adding to the proportion of celibates in almost +all the civilized countries of the world. It is this, without much +doubt, which will put an end to the infant marriages of India. From one +point of view, feminism is a moral movement. More important, it depends +upon the economic changes of the last few centuries. The Christian +churches, both Catholic and Protestant, until quite recently, strove to +maintain women in an inferior position. The orthodox Jew still gives +thanks to God for making him something better than a woman, while the +Jewess meekly praises him for making her what he thought it right that +she should be. In the Middle Ages, when these prayers were written +and seemed perfectly natural, the position of women among Jews seems +to have been considerably higher than it was among Christians and +Mohammedans. It was the Renaissance, which was essentially a revolt +against medieval other worldliness, that gave women something much +better than chivalric glorification, the right to develop freely, to +study, to live for themselves. + +The Renaissance grew out of the beginnings of the Commercial +Revolution. That the time was not altogether ripe for it is shown by +the coincident and essentially opposite movement of the Reformation +or Protestant Revolution. The Renaissance was choked, but it did not +die, and it rose up once more in the Enlightenment. Again there was a +development of feminism, frowned upon by the leaders of the religious +revival that spread through Europe after the downfall of Napoleon and +flickered out as the prudery of the Victorian age. + +If marriage for money must be considered a by-product of civilization, +it is possible to contend that it belongs only to the upper savage and +the barbarous stages. That is to say, it is characteristic neither of +the lowest (simplest) peoples nor of the most highly civilized. With +both these classes, the position of women is comparatively advantageous. + +In early days, however, it is highly probable that the women had no +objection to “child marriage.” I put these words within quotation +marks for two reasons. First, though most anthropologists have been +coming over to Westermarck’s views that primordial man was accustomed +to live in families not essentially different from our own, this still +remains unproved. Secondly, young people who have reached the age of +puberty are considered adults in savage and barbarous communities. +They are circumcised or submitted to other initiation rites and then +admitted to the full privileges of men and women. + +Now, in such countries as the United States and Great Britain, we feel +differently about girls of thirteen. We consider them immature, and we +believe that they should play and go to school. Our changed attitude is +largely the result of conditions brought about by the machine age. As +to the hygienic advantages and disadvantages of marriage or its sexual +equivalent for such young girls, I suppose there is room for difference +of opinion. We hear that the women grow old quickly in those countries +where marriage takes place early, but probably this is because the +ripening is naturally advanced in most of them. Other interesting +questions arise in this connection. For example, are the children of a +fourteen-year-old and of a fifteen-year-old mother inferior mentally +and physically to those born of older women? The matter is not easily +solved. Even if scientists were more free than they are to experiment +with human beings, they could not easily establish the equality of +“other things” necessary in bringing about valid results. + +In the First Book of Kings, there is revealed one reason for child +marriage that has been of some importance. “Now King David,” the story +goes, “was old and stricken in years; and he was covered with clothes, +but he did not get warm. Therefore his servants said to him, ‘Let +there be sought for my lord the king a young virgin, and let her stand +before the king, and let her cherish him, and let her lie in thy bosom, +that my lord the king may get heat.’ So they sought for a fair damsel +throughout all the coasts of Israel, and found Abishag a Shunammite, +and brought her to the king. And the damsel was very fair, and she +cherished the king and ministered to him; but the king knew her not.” + +This is rather puzzling to the modern reader. Why was it necessary +to warm the aged monarch with a virgin, especially since we are +told explicitly that there was no sexual intercourse? Why would the +ancient equivalent of our modern hot-water bottle not have served +the purpose just as well? We have here a magic practice or a bit of +superstition. King David’s advisers believed that close propinquity +between a young and vigorous person and an old and feeble one would +bring about a transfer of energy from the former to the latter. A +chaste maiden was held to be particularly desirable as the subject. +Late in the eighteenth century, a well-known German physician, J. P. +Frank, remarked that there might be something in the old belief. When +Henry James wrote _The Sacred Fount_, he made the flow of beauty and of +wisdom between people much exposed to each other an important element +in his story. + +Belief in the special sacredness of virginity is still widespread. It +takes some curious forms, as in parts of Jugoslavia, where the peasants +think that venereal disease can be cured by intercourse with a maiden. +In primitive communities, when the magical effects supposed to be +derived from virgins is sought, very young girls are usually chosen. +Ploss-Bartels has called it a regular symptom of simple culture that +undeveloped females are married or exploited. This is an exaggeration; +but, so far as the statement is true, it largely reflects the King +David superstition. + +The Guatos of Brazil are said to sell their daughters between the ages +of five and eight or nine. A traveler asked one of the Indians how he +could treat such a child as his wife, and the answer was, “She only +sleeps at my side because she is my property, and I will not cohabit +with her until she is twice as large.” However, he later learned that +this was not the case. Similar cases have been reported from widely +separated parts of the world. In Celebes, it is said that Europeans +sometimes conform to the native practice sufficiently to lease girls of +twelve or thirteen. In the New Britain Islands, girls of ten or twelve +are married to men of twenty-five or thirty. + +In some of the islands of the Pacific, it is common for fathers to +betroth their unborn children. The Fijians and the Samoans used +occasionally to arrange marriages between infant girls and middle-aged +or elderly men. More often, the Pacific islanders affiance children to +each other. In one region, it is customary for the engaged boy to be +taken into the care of his future wife’s family at the same time that +his own parents take care of the engaged girl. Elsewhere, the betrothed +female child is taken to her future husband’s home even though the +rule may be that he is not to have any social intercourse with her +whatsoever, as much as a passing word being forbidden. + +While the girls (except in the instances where some of them serve as +celibate priestesses or as prostitutes) marry young among practically +all simple peoples, this is not always the case with the boys. For +example, there is a part of Dutch New Guinea where the young men live +together in a communal house, their erotic life being homosexual. +Wherever it is common for the older and wealthier men to have large +seraglios, the younger and poorer ones may be compelled to do without +wives. + +While most American Indians married young, there were a few tribes +in which it was considered proper for men to wait until they were +twenty-five or thereabouts. Moreover, many savage and barbarous +communities require young men to undergo certain tests before they can +join the ranks of the married. They may have to show that they are good +fishermen or hunters or that they are skilled in certain handicrafts or +that they are courageous and skilled in war. + +There are Australian tribes in which men under thirty, if they are +determined to marry, must take old women. The young girls go to the +elders of the community. It is said that gray hairs in the beard are +prerequisite to marriage among the Arunta and the Loritja. There +are some simple communities where sexual indulgence is easy outside +of marriage, and here there are more likely to be large classes of +bachelors over the age of twenty. But it is usually desirable to have a +home and children, who support the father in his old age and feed his +ghost or pray for the repose of his soul after he dies. + +There is a fairly widespread belief among the simpler peoples that +chastity is requisite to the fullest exercise of magical and physical +powers. Accordingly, the men may have to sleep apart from their wives +for a certain period before leaving on an expedition of hunting or war. +But if the soldiers of the village or tribe must be constantly on the +alert, it is sometimes held necessary for them to remain unmarried. +This does not always imply their entire abstinence from sexual +relations. However, the soldiers are usually discharged from active +service at thirty or thirty-five. For a long period in Roman history, +military men were required to remain unmarried. Most of them seem to +have had concubines, in some instances the same women who had been +their wives before their entrance into the army. + + + + +FORBIDDEN MARRIAGES + + +With us, just as with savages and barbarians, there is an inner circle +of relatives with whom we may not mate, an outer circle beyond which +we may not go. Thus, in modern civilized countries, brothers do not +marry sisters, mothers do not marry sons. There are jurisdictions in +which the marriage of first cousins is forbidden. As to the outer +circle, it sometimes engirdles the whole of humanity. We are, however, +familiar with narrower limits, since we have in the United States laws +forbidding white people to marry Negroes and sometimes members of +other races as well. Besides, lines are drawn by custom and religion. +Catholics seldom marry Protestants, pious Jews practically never marry +Gentiles. There was a time when orthodox Quakers did not allow their +children to woo Hicksites. Even in America, there are important class +distinctions. A millionaire’s daughter may elope with the chauffeur, +but her father and his friends are not likely to be pleased about it. +The son of a first family is not expected to marry a girl from the +wrong side of the gasworks. + +We may define endogamy as the requirement of marrying within a certain +group. The laws and customs which forbid “mixed marriages” are +endogamous. Exogamy is the rule prohibiting the marriage of those who +are considered too closely related. The crime forbidden by exogamy we +call incest. In most civilized countries, there are comparatively few +degrees of relationship which are considered incestuous. In primitive +communities, very distant cousins and persons whose blood ties are +imaginary may be forbidden to marry. + +The most general rule of incest forbids a father to marry his daughter, +a mother to marry her son. It seems to be “universally prevalent in +mankind,” according to Westermarck. Rivers says, “We know of no people +who allow marriage between mother and son.” He thinks that matrimony +between father and daughter is sometimes legal. The authorities do not +deny that there are cases of mother-son as well as father-daughter +cohabitation. In fact, they exist in Europe and the United States. +The debatable matter is whether or not they are ever recognized and +approved by custom. + +We have a number of accounts, from various parts of the American +continents, of Indian tribes in which our rules of incest do not hold. +Thus, a traveler in Ecuador tells us that Pioje widows often take their +sons as second husbands, and that widowers take their daughters. Some +of the Tinne Indians marry sisters and daughters. And similar cases are +reported from Africa, Asia, and other parts of the world. If these are +incestuous, at least incest is treated as a very mild offense in the +communities where they occur. And we know that there was a time when +the priests of Persia advocated marriage between near relatives as a +religious duty. In short, the comparative study of exogamy confirms +the general rule that there is absolutely no moral principle upon +which all mankind agrees. There are, indeed, some fairly well defined +ethical principles; and it may be true that the human repugnance +toward intimate relations with a father or mother, with sons or with +daughters, which is widespread though not universal, arose originally +out of an animal instinct. + +Marriage between brother and sister is not a great deal commoner. +It has perhaps occurred most commonly in the case of monarchs. The +Pharaohs and the Ptolemies of Egypt seem to have believed that they +could find women sufficiently exalted to be their queens only in the +daughters of their own fathers and mothers. The chieftains of Hawaii +had similar ideas. Among the Incas of Peru, the Singhalese, the +Persians, and a few other peoples, the kings were privileged to marry +full sisters. + +In some of these countries, persons of lower rank are also reported +to have contracted such matrimonial alliances. Much more frequent are +weddings between half-brothers and half-sisters. In our own century, +a king of Siam has had two queens, both his half-sisters. Usually the +relationship in such marriages is through the fathers, perhaps because +paternity is more difficult to prove than maternity. In ancient Athens, +it was legally permissible to marry a half-sister. According to some +authorities, she might not be the child of the same mother. There are +several stories in the Bible about unions between half-brother and +half-sister. Abraham says of Sarah, “And yet she is my sister; she is +the daughter of my father, but not the daughter of my mother; and she +became my wife.” + +The propriety of marriage between cousins, between uncle and niece, and +between aunt and nephew, varies greatly from one country to another +and sometimes within the community according to religious belief and +social rank. The Jewish code permits an uncle to marry his niece, but +treats a union between aunt and nephew as incestuous. There is a tribe +in the Caucasus where a mother’s sister, but not a father’s sister, may +be married. Marriage with a first cousin is by some peoples considered +highly meritorious. By others it is strictly forbidden. It is against +the law in a few European countries and in some of our states, but is +usually possible with some little extra trouble. The objection to it +seems to be derived chiefly from the old law of the Christian church, +although it may be eugenically unsound in certain instances. The +prohibition against marrying a nephew or a niece is commoner than that +against the marriage of cousins german. There does not seem to be any +civilized country where remoter cousins are forbidden to marry, except +a few influenced by the Eastern church. + +In the simpler communities, exogamy often has reference to a large +class, such as a phratry or sub-tribe or clan. Whether the members of +these subdivisions are what we should call close relatives or not, +marriage between them is forbidden. Some of the Iroquois Indians had a +complicated system of clans, of which half were in one group and half +in another. It used to be forbidden to marry any person within the +group to which one belonged; that is to say, about half the tribe was +ineligible. More recently, exogamy has been confined to the clan alone, +or to about one-eighth of the tribe. Other Indians have had similar +laws, varying greatly in detail. + +There are regions in various parts of the world where known relatives, +no matter of what degree, are unable to marry legally. The old penal +law of China provided that anybody marrying a person bearing the same +name as himself should be severely beaten, and the marriage declared +invalid. Elsewhere, cousins of seven degrees or less are held to +be within the incest circle. Clan exogamy is found in most of the +Australian tribes, with complications which we might otherwise believe +to be beyond the capacity of the natives; and violations have until +recent times been usually punishable with death. + +In the early days of Rome, marriages within the sixth degree were +treated as incestuous. The degrees were computed by counting back to +the common ancestor and then down again. Thus, second cousins were +related in the sixth degree; parent, grandparent, great-grandparent, +grandparent, parent, and the cousin. In the Eastern or Orthodox branch +of the Christian church, second cousins were forbidden to marry, only +the seventh degree being considered sufficiently removed. In the +Western or Roman Catholic church, the prohibition extended at one +time to sixth cousins. It no longer exists beyond the degree of third +cousins, and dispensations for those who are more closely related are +common. + +Adoption and the spiritual relationship existing between godfather and +godchild (sometimes also between close relatives of the two) have +been at various times and in many places barriers to marriage. In +Great Britain, it was not made possible until 1907 for a man to wed +his deceased wife’s sister. Such a wedding is also forbidden by the +Catholic canon law. + +However, the levirate (from the Latin _levir_, brother-in-law), which +is a custom according to which a dead man’s brother must inevitably +under certain circumstances marry his widow, has been very widespread. +Among the Hindus and some others, the obligation arises if the dead man +has left no children behind. The Bible has two laws on the subject. +In Leviticus: “And if a man shall take his brother’s wife, it is an +unclean thing: he has uncovered his brother’s nakedness; they shall +be childless.” In Deuteronomy: “If brethren dwell together, and one +of them die, leaving no child, the dead man’s wife shall not marry a +stranger; her husband’s brother shall go unto her, and take her as +his wife, and perform the duty of a husband’s brother to her. And the +firstborn that she bears shall succeed in the name of his brother who +is dead, that his name shall not disappear in Israel.” + +It is sometimes said that the law of Leviticus sets up a general rule, +to which an exception is made in Deuteronomy. More likely, there was +an actual change in custom. Later still, the rabbis frowned upon +levirate marriage even in cases of childless death. The exposure to +shame provided for brothers-in-law who fail to marry as directed in +Deuteronomy has become a merely formal ceremony among orthodox Jews. +The widow loosens her brother-in-law’s shoe (this and his foot must be +clean, according to rabbinic law) and spits on the ground before him. +The levirate often encourages polygamy, for the duty of marrying a dead +brother’s sister may exist even when one already has a wife or two. + +Among various peoples, marriage between cousins has been especially +stimulated. Sometimes it is possible to get a cousin as a wife without +charge, while others must be paid for. Or, as among the desert Bedouin, +the first cousin has an option to purchase at a reduced rate. In +certain Hindu communities, a man is supposed to marry his sister’s +daughter, even if she happens to be older than himself. + +The caste system of India greatly limits the circle from which a wife +or a husband may be chosen. There are sub-castes, and under certain +circumstances bride and groom may have to belong to the same one. +Sometimes hypergamy, which has already been explained, makes the matter +still more complicated. + +In general, caste or class as a matter of endogamy is of importance not +only in India. In parts of Africa, the blacksmiths never intermarry +with the rest of the population, taking only smiths’ daughters as their +wives. Free men have often been forbidden to marry slaves, though not +necessarily to cohabit with them. Medieval knights were not accustomed +to make the daughters of serfs their wedded wives. Modern noblemen +marry untitled women only for especially good reasons. Monarchs are +expected to enter into full matrimony with persons of royal or princely +rank. + + + + +Transcriber’s Note: + +- Text that was in italics is enclosed by underscores (_italics_). + +- Inconsistencies in hyphenation have been standardized. + +- Minor punctuation errors have been changed without notice. + +- Spelling was retained as in the original except for the following +changes: + + Page 8: “to earn a livilihood” to “to earn a livelihood” + Page 12: “for the young men” to “for the young man” + Page 15: “it may be opposite” to “it may be apposite” + Page 28: “could find women sufficently” to “could find women + sufficiently” +*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 78927 *** |