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} + </style> + </head> + <body> +<div style='text-align:center'>*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 78167 ***</div> + +<div class='tnotes covernote'> + +<p class='c000'><strong>Transcriber’s Note:</strong></p> + +<p class='c000'>New original cover art included with this eBook is granted to the public domain.</p> + +</div> + +<div class='titlepage'> + +<div class='nf-center-c0'> +<div class='nf-center c001'> + <div>“<i>Familiar in their Mouths as HOUSEHOLD WORDS.</i>”—<span class='sc'>Shakespeare.</span></div> + </div> +</div> + +<div> + <span class='pageno' id='Page_73'>73</span> + <h1 class='c002'>HOUSEHOLD WORDS.<br> <span class='xlarge'>A WEEKLY JOURNAL.</span></h1> +</div> + +<div class='nf-center-c0'> +<div class='nf-center c003'> + <div><span class='large'>CONDUCTED BY CHARLES DICKENS.</span></div> + <div class='c001'>N<sup>o.</sup> 4.]      SATURDAY, APRIL 20, 1850.      [<span class='sc'>Price</span> 2<i>d.</i></div> + </div> +</div> + +</div> + +<div class='chapter'> + <h2 class='c004'>SOME ACCOUNT OF AN EXTRAORDINARY TRAVELLER.</h2> +</div> + +<p class='c005'>No longer ago than this Easter time last +past, we became acquainted with the subject +of the present notice. Our knowledge of him +is not by any means an intimate one, and is +only of a public nature. We have never interchanged +any conversation with him, except +on one occasion when he asked us to have the +goodness to take off our hat, to which we +replied ‘Certainly.’</p> + +<p class='c006'><span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span> was born (we believe) in Rood +Lane, in the City of London. He is now a +gentleman advanced in life, and has for some +years resided in the neighbourhood of Islington. +His father was a wholesale grocer (perhaps), +and he was (possibly) in the same way +of business; or he may, at an early age, have +become a clerk in the Bank of England, or in +a private bank, or in the India House. It will +be observed that we make no pretence of having +any information in reference to the private +history of this remarkable man, and that +our account of it must be received as rather +speculative than authentic.</p> + +<p class='c006'>In person <span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span> is below the middle +size, and corpulent. His countenance is florid, +he is perfectly bald, and soon hot; and there +is a composure in his gait and manner, calculated +to impress a stranger with the idea of +his being, on the whole, an unwieldy man. It +is only in his eye that the adventurous character +of <span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span> is seen to shine. It is +a moist, bright eye, of a cheerful expression, +and indicative of keen and eager curiosity.</p> + +<p class='c006'>It was not until late in life that <span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span> +conceived the idea of entering on the extraordinary +amount of travel he has since accomplished. +He had attained the age of sixty-five, +before he left England for the first time. +In all the immense journies he has since performed, +he has never laid aside the English +dress, nor departed in the slightest degree +from English customs. Neither does he speak +a word of any language but his own.</p> + +<p class='c006'><span class='sc'>Mr. Booley’s</span> powers of endurance are +wonderful. All climates are alike to him. +Nothing exhausts him; no alternations of +heat and cold appear to have the least effect +upon his hardy frame. His capacity of travelling, +day and night, for thousands of miles, +has never been approached by any traveller +of whom we have any knowledge through the +help of books. An intelligent Englishman +may have occasionally pointed out to him +objects and scenes of interest; but otherwise +he has travelled alone, and unattended. +Though remarkable for personal cleanliness, +he has carried no luggage; and his diet has +been of the simplest kind. He has often found +a biscuit, or a bun, sufficient for his support +over a vast tract of country. Frequently, he +has travelled hundreds of miles, fasting, without +the least abatement of his natural spirits. +It says much for the Total Abstinence cause, +that <span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span> has never had recourse to +the artificial stimulus of alcohol, to sustain +him under his fatigues.</p> + +<p class='c006'>His first departure from the sedentary and +monotonous life he had hitherto led, strikingly +exemplifies, we think, the energetic character, +long suppressed by that unchanging routine. +Without any communication with any member +of his family—<span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span> has never been +married, but has many relations—without +announcing his intention to his solicitor, or +banker, or any person entrusted with the +management of his affairs, he closed the door +of his house behind him at one o’clock in the +afternoon of a certain day, and immediately +proceeded to New Orleans, in the United +States of America.</p> + +<p class='c006'>His intention was to ascend the Mississippi +and Missouri rivers, to the base of the Rocky +Mountains. Taking his passage in a steamboat +without loss of time, he was soon upon +the bosom of the Father of Waters, as the +Indians call the mighty stream which, night +and day, is always carrying huge instalments +of the vast continent of the New World, down +into the sea.</p> + +<p class='c006'><span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span> found it singularly interesting +to observe the various stages of civilisation +obtaining on the banks of these mighty +rivers. Leaving the luxury and brightness of +New Orleans—a somewhat feverish luxury +and brightness, he observed, as if the swampy +soil were too much enriched in the hot sun with +the bodies of dead slaves—and passing various +towns in every stage of progress, it was very +curious to observe the changes of civilisation +and of vegetation too. Here, where the doomed +Negro race were working in the plantations, +while the republican overseer looked on, whip +in hand, tropical trees were growing, beautiful +<span class='pageno' id='Page_74'>74</span>flowers in bloom; the alligator, with his horribly +sly face, and his jaws like two great +saws, was basking on the mud; and the strange +moss of the country was hanging in wreaths +and garlands on the trees, like votive offerings. +A little farther towards the west, and the +trees and flowers were changed, the moss was +gone, younger infant towns were rising, forests +were slowly disappearing, and the trees, +obliged to aid in the destruction of their kind, +fed the heavily-breathing monster that came +clanking up those solitudes, laden with the +pioneers of the advancing human army. The +river itself, that moving highway, showed him +every kind of floating contrivance, from the +lumbering flat-bottomed boat, and the raft of +logs, upward to the steamboat, and downward +to the poor Indian’s frail canoe. A winding +thread through the enormous range of country, +unrolling itself before the wanderer like the +magic skein in the story, he saw it tracked by +wanderers of every kind, roaming from the +more settled world, to those first nests of men. +The floating theatre, dwelling-house, hotel, +museum, shop; the floating mechanism for +screwing the trunks of mighty trees out of the +mud, like antediluvian teeth; the rapidly-flowing +river, and the blazing woods; he left +them all behind—town, city, and log-cabin, +too; and floated up into the prairies and savannahs, +among the deserted lodges of tribes of +savages, and among their dead, lying alone on +little wooden stages with their stark faces upward +towards the sky. Among the blazing +grass, and herds of buffaloes and wild horses, +and among the wigwams of the fast-declining +Indians, he began to consider how, in the +eternal current of progress setting across +this globe in one unchangeable direction, +like the unseen agency that points the needle +to the pole, the Chiefs who only dance the +dances of their fathers, and will never have a +new figure for a new tune, and the Medicine-men +who know no Medicine but what was +Medicine a hundred years ago, must be surely +and inevitably swept from the earth, whether +they be Choctawas, Mandans, Britons, Austrians, +or Chinese.</p> + +<p class='c006'>He was struck, too, by the reflection that +savage nature was not by any means such a +fine and noble spectacle as some delight to +represent it. He found it a poor, greasy, +paint-plastered, miserable thing enough; but +a very little way above the beasts in most +respects; in many customs a long way below +them. It occurred to him that the ‘Big Bird,’ +or the ‘Blue Fish,’ or any of the other Braves, +was but a troublesome braggart after all; +making a mighty whooping and holloaing +about nothing particular, doing very little for +science, not much more than the monkeys for +art, scarcely anything worth mentioning for +letters, and not often making the world greatly +better than he found it. Civilisation, <span class='sc'>Mr. +Booley</span> concluded, was, on the whole, with all +its blemishes, a more imposing sight, and a far +better thing to stand by.</p> + +<p class='c006'><span class='sc'>Mr. Booley’s</span> observations of the celestial +bodies, on this voyage, were principally confined +to the discovery of the alarming fact, +that light had altogether departed from the +moon; which presented the appearance of a +white dinner-plate. The clouds, too, conducted +themselves in an extraordinary manner, and +assumed the most eccentric forms, while the +sun rose and set in a very reckless way. On +his return to his native country, however, he +had the satisfaction of finding all these things +as usual.</p> + +<p class='c006'>It might have been expected that at his +advanced age, retired from the active duties +of life, blest with a competency, and happy in +the affections of his numerous relations, +<span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span> would now have settled himself +down, to muse, for the remainder of his days, +over the new stock of experience thus acquired. +But travel had whetted, not satisfied, +his appetite; and remembering that he had +not seen the Ohio river, except at the point of +its junction with the Mississippi, he returned +to the United States, after a short interval of +repose, and appearing suddenly at Cincinnati, +the queen City of the West, traversed the clear +waters of the Ohio to its Falls. In this expedition +he had the pleasure of encountering a +party of intelligent workmen from Birmingham +who were making the same tour. Also +his nephew Septimus, aged only thirteen. +This intrepid boy had started from Peckham, +in the old country, with two and sixpence +sterling in his pocket; and had, when he encountered +his uncle at a point of the Ohio +River, called Snaggy Bar, still one shilling of +that sum remaining!</p> + +<p class='c006'>Again at home, <span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span> was so pressed +by his appetite for knowledge as to remain at +home only one day. At the expiration of +that short period, he actually started for New +Zealand.</p> + +<p class='c006'>It is almost incredible that a man in <span class='sc'>Mr. +Booley’s</span> station of life, however adventurous +his nature, and however few his artificial +wants, should cast himself on a voyage of +thirteen thousand miles from Great Britain +with no other outfit than his watch and purse, +and no arms but his walking-stick. We are, +however, assured on the best authority, that +thus he made the passage out, and thus appeared, +in the act of wiping his smoking head +with his pocket-handkerchief, at the entrance +to Port Nicholson in Cook’s Straits: with the +very spot within his range of vision, where +his illustrious predecessor, Captain Cook, so +unhappily slain at Otaheite, once anchored.</p> + +<p class='c006'>After contemplating the swarms of cattle +maintained on the hills in this neighbourhood, +and always to be found by the stockmen +when they are wanted, though nobody takes +any care of them—which <span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span> considered +the more remarkable, as their natural +objection to be killed might be supposed to +be augmented by the beauty of the climate—<span class='sc'>Mr. +Booley</span> proceeded to the town of Wellington. +Having minutely examined it in +<span class='pageno' id='Page_75'>75</span>every point, and made himself perfect master +of the whole natural history and process of +manufacture of the flax-plant, with its splendid +yellow blossoms, he repaired to a Native +Pa, which, unlike the Native Pa to which he +was accustomed, he found to be a town, and +not a parent. Here he observed a Chief +with a long spear, making every demonstration +of spitting a visitor, but really giving +him the Maori or welcome—a word <span class='sc'>Mr. +Booley</span> is inclined to derive from the known +hospitality of our English Mayors—and here +also he observed some Europeans rubbing +noses, by way of shaking hands, with the +aboriginal inhabitants. After participating in +an affray between the natives and the English +soldiery, in which the former were defeated +with great loss, he plunged into the Bush, +and there camped out for some months, until +he had made a survey of the whole country.</p> + +<p class='c006'>While leading this wild life, encamped by +night near a stream for the convenience of +water, in a Ware, or hut, built open in the +front, with a roof sloping backward to the +ground, and made of poles, covered and enclosed +with bark or fern, it was <span class='sc'>Mr. Booley’s</span> +singular fortune to encounter Miss Creeble, +of The Misses Creebles’ Boarding and Day +Establishment for Young Ladies, Kennington +Oval, who, accompanied by three of her young +ladies in search of information, had achieved +this marvellous journey, and was then also in +the Bush. Miss Creeble having very unsettled +opinions on the subject of gunpowder, +was afraid that it entered into the composition +of the fire before the tent, and that something +would presently blow up or go off. +<span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span>, as a more experienced traveller, +assuring her that there was no danger; and +calming the fears of the young ladies, an +acquaintance commenced between them. They +accomplished the rest of their travels in New +Zealand together, and the best understanding +prevailed among the little party. They took +notice of the trees, as the Kaikatea, the Kauri, +the Ruta, the Pukatea, the Hinau, and the +Tanakaka—names which Miss Creeble had +a bland relish in pronouncing. They admired +the beautiful, arborescent, palm-like fern, +abounding everywhere, and frequently exceeding +thirty feet in height. They wondered at +the curious owl, who is supposed to demand +‘More Pork!’ wherever he flies, and whom +Miss Creeble termed ‘an admonition of Nature’s +against greediness!’ And they contemplated +some very rampant natives, of cannibal +propensities. After many pleasing and instructive +vicissitudes, they returned to England in +company, where the ladies were safely put +into a hackney cabriolet by <span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span>, in +Leicester Square, London.</p> + +<p class='c006'>And now, indeed, it might have been imagined +that that roving spirit, tired of rambling +about the world, would have settled down at +home in peace and honor. Not so. After +repairing to the tubular bridge across the +Menai Straits, and accompanying Her Majesty +on her visit to Ireland (which he characterised +as ‘a magnificent Exhibition’), <span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span>, +with his usual absence of preparation, departed +for Australia.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Here again, he lived out in the Bush, passing +his time chiefly among the working-gangs +of convicts who were carrying timber. He +was much impressed by the ferocious mastiffs +chained to barrels, who assist the sentries in +keeping guard over those misdoers. But he +observed that the atmosphere in this part of +the world, unlike the descriptions he had +read of it, was extremely thick, and that +objects were misty, and difficult to be discerned. +From a certain unsteadiness and +trembling, too, which he frequently remarked +on the face of Nature, he was led to conclude +that this part of the globe was subject to +convulsive heavings and earthquakes. This +caused him to return, with some precipitation.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Again at home, and probably reflecting that +the countries he had hitherto visited were +new in the history of man, this extraordinary +traveller resolved to proceed up the Nile to +the second cataract. At the next performance +of the great ceremony of ‘opening the +Nile,’ at Cairo, <span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span> was present.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Along that wonderful river, associated with +such stupendous fables, and with a history more +prodigious than any fancy of man, in its vast +and gorgeous facts; among temples, palaces, +pyramids, colossal statues, crocodiles, tombs, +obelisks, mummies, sand and ruin; he proceeded, +like an opium-eater in a mighty dream. +Thebes rose before him. An avenue of two +hundred sphinxes, with not a head among +them,—one of six or eight, or ten such +avenues, all leading to a common centre,—conducted +to the Temple of Carnak: its +walls, eighty feet high and twenty-five feet +thick, a mile and three-quarters in circumference; +the interior of its tremendous hall, +occupying an area of forty-seven thousand +square feet, large enough to hold four great +Christian churches, and yet not more than +one-seventh part of the entire ruin. Obelisks +he saw, thousands of years of age, as sharp as +if the chisel had cut their edges yesterday; +colossal statues fifty-two feet high, with ‘little’ +fingers five feet and a half long; a very world +of ruins, that were marvellous old ruins in the +days of Herodotus; tombs cut high up in the +rock, where European travellers live solitary, +as in stony crows’ nests, burning mummied +Thebans, gentle and simple,—of the dried +blood-royal maybe,—for their daily fuel, and +making articles of furniture of their dusty +coffins. Upon the walls of temples, in colors +fresh and bright as those of yesterday, he +read the conquests of great Egyptian monarchs; +upon the tombs of humbler people +in the same blooming symbols, he saw their +ancient way of working at their trades, of +riding, driving, feasting, playing games; of +marrying and burying, and performing on instruments, +and singing songs, and healing by +the power of animal magnetism, and performing +<span class='pageno' id='Page_76'>76</span>all the occupations of life. He visited the +quarries of Silsileh, whence nearly all the red +stone used by the ancient Egyptian architects +and sculptors came; and there beheld +enormous single-stoned colossal figures nearly +finished—redly snowed up, as it were, and trying +hard to break out—waiting for the finishing +touches, never to be given by the mummied +hands of thousands of years ago. In front +of the temple of Abou Simbel, he saw gigantic +figures sixty feet in height and twenty-one +across the shoulders, dwarfing live men on +camels down to pigmies. Elsewhere he beheld +complacent monsters tumbled down like +ill-used Dolls of a Titanic make, and staring +with stupid benignity at the arid earth whereon +their huge faces rested. His last look of +that amazing land was at the Great Sphinx, +buried in the sand—sand in its eyes, sand in +its ears, sand drifted on its broken nose, sand +lodging, feet deep, in the ledges of its head—struggling +out of a wide sea of sand, as if to +look hopelessly forth for the ancient glories +once surrounding it.</p> + +<p class='c006'>In this expedition, <span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span> acquired +some curious information in reference to the +language of hieroglyphics. He encountered the +Simoom in the Desert, and lay down, with the +rest of his caravan, until it had passed over. He +also beheld on the horizon some of those stalking +pillars of sand, apparently reaching from +earth to heaven, which, with the red sun shining +through them, so terrified the Arabs attendant +on Bruce, that they fell prostrate, crying that +the Day of Judgment was come. More Copts, +Turks, Arabs, Fellahs, Bedouins, Mosques, +Mamelukes, and Moosulmen he saw, than we +have space to tell. His days were all Arabian +Nights, and he saw wonders without end.</p> + +<p class='c006'>This might have satiated any ordinary man, +for a time at least. But <span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span>, being no +ordinary man, within twenty-four hours of his +arrival at home was making The Overland +Journey to India.</p> + +<p class='c006'>He has emphatically described this, as ‘a +beautiful piece of scenery,’ and ‘a perfect picture.’ +The appearance of Malta and Gibraltar +he can never sufficiently commend. In crossing +the Desert from Grand Cairo to Suez, +he was particularly struck by the undulations +of the Sandscape (he preferred that word to +Landscape, as more expressive of the region), +and by the incident of beholding a caravan +upon its line of march; a spectacle which in +the remembrance always affords him the +utmost pleasure. Of the stations on the +Desert, and the cinnamon gardens of Ceylon, +he likewise entertains a lively recollection. +Calcutta he praises also; though he has been +heard to observe that the British military at +that seat of Government were not as well proportioned +as he could desire the soldiers of his +country to be; and that the breed of horses there +in use was susceptible of some improvement.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Once more in his native land, with the +vigor of his constitution unimpaired by the +many toils and fatigues he had encountered, +what had <span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span> now to do, but, full of +years and honor, to recline upon the grateful +appreciation of his Queen and country, always +eager to distinguish peaceful merit? What +had he now to do, but to receive the decoration +ever ready to be bestowed, in England, +on men deservedly distinguished, and to take +his place among the best? He had this to do. +He had yet to achieve the most astonishing +enterprise for which he was reserved. In all +the countries he had yet visited, he had seen +no frost and snow. He resolved to make a +voyage to the ice-bound Arctic Regions.</p> + +<p class='c006'>In pursuance of this surprising determination, +<span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span> accompanied the Expedition +under Sir James Ross, consisting of Her +Majesty’s ships, the Enterprise and Investigator, +which sailed from the river Thames on +the 12th of May, 1848, and which, on the 11th +of September, entered Port Leopold Harbor.</p> + +<p class='c006'>In this inhospitable region, surrounded by +eternal ice, cheered by no glimpse of the sun, +shrouded in gloom and darkness, <span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span> +passed the entire winter. The ships were +covered in, and fortified all round with walls +of ice and snow; the masts were frozen up; +hoar frost settled on the yards, tops, shrouds, +stays, and rigging; around, in every direction, +lay an interminable waste, on which only the +bright stars, the yellow moon, and the vivid +Aurora Borealis looked, by night or day.</p> + +<p class='c006'>And yet the desolate sublimity of this +astounding spectacle was broken in a pleasant +and surprising manner. In the remote solitude +to which he had penetrated, <span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span> +(who saw no Esquimaux during his stay, +though he looked for them in every direction) +had the happiness of encountering two Scotch +gardeners; several English compositors, accompanied +by their wives; three brass +founders from the neighbourhood of Long Acre, +London; two coach painters, a gold-beater +and his only daughter, by trade a stay-maker; +and several other working-people from sundry +parts of Great Britain who had conceived +the extraordinary idea of ‘holiday-making’ +in the frozen wilderness. Hither too, had +Miss Creeble and her three young ladies +penetrated: the latter attired in braided peacoats +of a comparatively light material; and +Miss Creeble defended from the inclemency +of a Polar Winter by no other outer garment +than a wadded Polka-jacket. He found this +courageous lady in the act of explaining, to +the youthful sharers of her toils, the various +phases of nature by which they were surrounded. +Her explanations were principally +wrong, but her intentions always admirable.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Cheered by the society of these fellow-adventurers, +<span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span> slowly glided on into +the summer season. And now, at midnight, +all was bright and shining. Mountains of ice, +wedged and broken into the strangest forms—jagged +points, spires, pinnacles, pyramids, +turrets, columns in endless succession and in +infinite variety, flashing and sparkling with +ten thousand hues, as though the treasures of +<span class='pageno' id='Page_77'>77</span>the earth were frozen up in all that water—appeared +on every side. Masses of ice, floating +and driving hither and thither, menaced +the hardy voyagers with destruction; and +threatened to crush their strong ships, like +nutshells. But, below those ships was clear +sea-water, now; the fortifying walls were +gone; the yards, tops, shrouds and rigging, +free from that hoary rust of long inaction, +showed like themselves again; and the sails, +bursting from the masts, like foliage which +the welcome sun at length developed, spread +themselves to the wind, and wafted the +travellers away.</p> + +<p class='c006'>In the short interval that has elapsed since +his safe return to the land of his birth, <span class='sc'>Mr. +Booley</span> has decided on no new expedition; +but he feels that he will yet be called upon to +undertake one, perhaps of greater magnitude +than any he has achieved, and frequently +remarks, in his own easy way, that he wonders +where the deuce he will be taken to next! +Possessed of good health and good spirits, +with powers unimpaired by all he has gone +through, and with an increase of appetite still +growing with what it feeds on, what may not +be expected yet from this extraordinary man!</p> + +<p class='c006'>It was only at the close of Easter week that, +sitting in an arm chair, at a private Club +called the Social Oysters, assembling at Highbury +Barn, where he is much respected, this +indefatigable traveller expressed himself in +the following terms:</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘It is very gratifying to me,’ said he, ‘to +have seen so much at my time of life, and to +have acquired a knowledge of the countries +I have visited, which I could not have derived +from books alone. When I was a boy, +such travelling would have been impossible, +as the gigantic-moving panorama or diorama +mode of conveyance, which I have +principally adopted (all my modes of conveyance +have been pictorial), had then not +been attempted. It is a delightful characteristic +of these times, that new and +cheap means are continually being devised, +for conveying the results of actual experience, +to those who are unable to obtain such experiences +for themselves; and to bring them +within the reach of the people—emphatically +of the people; for it is they at large who are +addressed in these endeavours, and not exclusive +audiences. Hence,’ said <span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span>, +‘even if I see a run on an idea, like the +panorama one, it awakens no ill-humour +within me, but gives me pleasant thoughts. +Some of the best results of actual travel are +suggested by such means to those whose +lot it is to stay at home. New worlds open +out to them, beyond their little worlds, and +widen their range of reflection, information, +sympathy, and interest. The more man knows +of man, the better for the common brotherhood +among us all. I shall, therefore,’ said +<span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span>, ‘now propose to the Social Oysters +the healths of Mr. Banvard, Mr. Brees, Mr. +Phillips, Mr. Allen, Mr. Prout, Messrs. +Bonomi, Fahey, and Warren, Mr. Thomas +Grieve, and Mr. Burford. Long life to them +all, and more power to their pencils!’</p> + +<p class='c006'>The Social Oysters having drunk this +toast with acclamation, <span class='sc'>Mr. Booley</span> proceeded +to entertain them with anecdotes of +his travels. This he is in the habit of doing +after they have feasted together, according to +the manner of Sinbad the Sailor—except that +he does not bestow upon the Social Oysters +the munificent reward of one hundred sequins +per night, for listening.</p> + +<div class='chapter'> + <h2 class='c004'>LOADED DICE.</h2> +</div> + +<p class='c005'>Several years ago I made a tour through +some of the Southern Counties of England +with a friend. We travelled in an open carriage, +stopping for a few hours a day, or a +week, as it might be, wherever there was any +thing to be seen: and we generally got through +one stage before breakfast, because it gave our +horses rest, and ourselves the chance of enjoying +the brown bread, new milk, and fresh eggs +of those country roadside inns, which are fast +becoming subjects for archæological investigation.</p> + +<p class='c006'>One evening my friend said, ‘To-morrow, +we will breakfast at T——. I want to inquire +about a family named Lovell, who used to live +there. I met the husband and wife and two +lovely children, one summer at Exmouth. +We became very intimate, and I thought them +particularly interesting people, but I have +never seen them since.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>The next morning’s sun shone as brightly +as heart could desire, and after a delightful +drive, we reached the outskirts of the town +about nine o’clock.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Oh, what a pretty inn!’ said I, as we approached +a small white house, with a sign +swinging in front of it, and a flower-garden on +one side.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Stop, John,’ cried my friend, ‘we shall +get a much cleaner breakfast here than in the +town, I dare say; and if there is anything to be +seen there, we can walk to it;’ so we alighted, +and were shown into a neat little parlour, +with white curtains, where an unexceptionable +rural breakfast was soon placed before us.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Pray do you happen to know anything of +a family called Lovell?’ inquired my friend, +whose name, by the way, was Markham. ‘Mr. +Lovell was a clergyman.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Yes, Ma’am,’ answered the girl who attended +us, apparently the landlord’s daughter, +‘Mr. Lovell is the vicar of our parish.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Indeed! and does he live near here?’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Yes, Ma’am, he lives at the vicarage. It’s +just down that lane opposite, about a quarter +of a mile from here; or you can go across the +fields, if you please, to where you see that +tower; it’s close by there.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘And which is the pleasantest road?’ inquired +Mrs. Markham.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Well, Ma’am, I think by the fields is the +pleasantest, if you don’t mind a stile or two; +<span class='pageno' id='Page_78'>78</span>and, besides, you get the best view of the +Abbey by going that way.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Is that tower we see part of the Abbey?’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Yes, Ma’am,’ answered the girl, ‘and the +vicarage is just the other side of it.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>Armed with these instructions, as soon as +we had finished our breakfast we started +across the fields, and after a pleasant walk +of twenty minutes we found ourselves in +an old churchyard, amongst a cluster of the +most picturesque ruins we had ever seen. +With the exception of the grey tower, which +we had espied from the inn, and which had +doubtless been the belfry, the remains were +not considerable. There was the outer wall +of the chancel, and the broken step that had +led to the high altar, and there were sections +of aisles, and part of a cloister, all gracefully +festooned with mosses and ivy; whilst mingled +with the grass-grown graves of the prosaic +dead, there were the massive tombs of the +Dame Margerys and the Sir Hildebrands of +more romantic periods. All was ruin and +decay; but such poetic ruin! such picturesque +decay! And just beyond the tall grey tower, +there was the loveliest, smiling, little garden, +and the prettiest cottage, that imagination +could picture. The day was so bright, the +grass so green, the flowers so gay, the air so +balmy with their sweet perfumes, the birds +sang so cheerily in the apple and cherry trees, +that all nature seemed rejoicing.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Well,’ said my friend, as she seated herself +on the fragment of a pillar, and looked around +her, ‘now that I see this place, I understand +the sort of people the Lovells were.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘What sort of people were they?’ said I.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Why, as I said before, interesting people. +In the first place, they were both extremely +handsome.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘But the locality had nothing to do with +their good looks, I presume,’ said I.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘I am not sure of that,’ she answered; +‘when there is the least foundation of taste or +intellect to set out with, the beauty of external +nature, and the picturesque accidents that +harmonise with it, do, I am persuaded, by +their gentle and elevating influences on the +mind, make the handsome handsomer, and the +ugly less ugly. But it was not alone the good +looks of the Lovells that struck me, but their +air of refinement and high breeding, and I +should say high birth—though I know nothing +about their extraction—combined with their +undisguised poverty and as evident contentment. +Now, I can understand such people +finding here an appropriate home, and being +satisfied with their small share of this world’s +goods; because here the dreams of romance +writers about Love in a Cottage might be +somewhat realised; poverty might be graceful +and poetical here; and then, you know, they +have no rent to pay.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Very true,’ said I; ‘but suppose they had +sixteen daughters, like a half-pay officer I +once met on board a steam-packet?’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘That would spoil it certainly,’ said Mrs. +Markham; ‘but let us hope they have not. +When I knew them they had only two children, +a boy and a girl, called Charles and +Emily; two of the prettiest creatures I ever +beheld!’</p> + +<p class='c006'>As my friend thought it yet rather early +for a visit, we had remained chattering in this +way for more than an hour, sometimes seated +on a tombstone, or a fallen column; sometimes +peering amongst the carved fragments +that were scattered about the ground, and +sometimes looking over the hedge into the +little garden, the wicket of which was immediately +behind the tower. The weather being +warm, most of the windows of the vicarage +were open and the blinds were all down; we +had not yet seen a soul stirring, and were just +wondering whether we might venture to +present ourselves at the door, when a strain +of distant music struck upon our ears. +‘Hark!’ I said, ‘how exquisite! It was the +only thing wanting to complete the charm.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘It’s a military band, I think,’ said Mrs. +Markham, ‘you know we passed some barracks +before we reached the Inn.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>Nearer and nearer drew the sound, solemn +and slow; the band was evidently approaching +by the green lane that skirted the fields +we had come by. ‘Hush,’ said I, laying my +hand on my friend’s arm, with a strange +sinking of the heart; ‘they are playing the +Dead March in Saul! Don’t you hear the +muffled drums? It’s a funeral, but where’s +the grave?’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘There!’ said she, pointing to a spot close +under the hedge where some earth had been +thrown up; but the aperture was covered +with a plank, probably to prevent accidents.</p> + +<p class='c006'>There are few ceremonies in life at once so +touching, so impressive, so sad, and yet so +beautiful, as a soldier’s funeral! Ordinary +funerals with their unwieldy hearses and +feathers, and the absurd looking mutes, and +the ‘inky cloaks’ and weepers, of hired +mourners, always seem to me like a mockery +of the dead; the appointments border so +closely on the grotesque; they are so little +in keeping with the true, the only view +of death that can render life endurable! +There is such a tone of exaggerated——forced, +heavy, over-acted gravity about the +whole thing, that one had need to have a +deep personal interest involved in the scene, +to be able to shut one’s eyes to the burlesque +side of it. But a military funeral, how different! +There you see death in life and life +in death! There is nothing over-strained, +nothing overdone. At once simple and +solemn, decent and decorous, consoling, yet +sad. The chief mourners, at best, are generally +true mourners, for they have lost a brother +with whom ‘they sat but yesterday at meat;’ +and whilst they are comparing memories, recalling +how merry they had many a day been +together, and the solemn tones of that sublime +music float upon the air, we can imagine the +freed and satisfied soul wafted on those harmonious +<span class='pageno' id='Page_79'>79</span>breathings to its Heavenly home; +and our hearts are melted, our imaginations +exalted, our faith invigorated, and we come +away the better for what we have seen.</p> + +<p class='c006'>I believe some such reflections as these were +passing through our minds, for we both remained +silent and listening, till the swinging-to +of the little wicket, which communicated with +the garden, aroused us; but nobody appeared, +and the tower being at the moment betwixt +us and it, we could not see who had entered. +Almost at the same moment, a man came in +from a gate on the opposite side, and advancing +to where the earth was thrown up, lifted +the plank and discovered the newly made +grave. He was soon followed by some boys, +and several respectable-looking persons came +into the enclosure, whilst nearer and nearer +drew the sound of the muffled drums, and +now we descried the firing party and their +officer, who led the procession with their arms +reversed, each man wearing above the elbow +a piece of black crape and a small bow of +white satin ribbon; the band still playing +that solemn strain. Then came the coffin, +borne by six soldiers. Six officers bore up +the pall, all quite young men; and on the +coffin lay the shako, sword, side-belt, and +white gloves of the deceased. A long train +of mourners marched two and two, in open +file, the privates first, the officers last. +Sorrow was imprinted on every face; there +was no unseemly chattering, no wandering +eyes; if a word was exchanged, it was in +a whisper, and the sad shake of the head +showed of whom they were discoursing. All +this we observed as they marched through +the lane that skirted one side of the churchyard. +As they neared the gate the band +ceased to play.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘See there,’ said Mrs. Markham, directing +my attention to the cottage, ‘there comes Mr. +Lovell. Oh, how he is changed!’ and whilst +she spoke, the clergyman entering by the +wicket, advanced to meet the procession at +the gate, where he commenced reading the +funeral service as he moved backwards towards +the grave, round which the firing party, +leaning on their firelocks, now formed. Then +came those awful words, ‘Ashes to ashes, dust +to dust,’ the hollow sound of the earth upon +the coffin, and three volleys fired over the +grave, finished the solemn ceremony.</p> + +<p class='c006'>When the procession entered the churchyard, +we had retired behind the broken wall +of the chancel, whence, without being observed, +we had watched the whole scene with +intense interest. Just as the words ‘Ashes +to ashes! dust to dust!’ were pronounced, +I happened to raise my eyes towards the +grey tower, and then, peering through one +of the narrow slits, I saw the face of a man—such +a face! Never to my latest day can +I forget the expression of those features! +If ever there was despair and anguish +written on a human countenance, it was +there! And yet so young! so beautiful! A +cold chill ran through my veins as I pressed +Mrs. Markham’s arm. ‘Look up at the +tower!’ I whispered.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘My God! What can it be?’ she answered, +turning quite pale! ‘And Mr. Lovell, did you +observe how his voice shook? at first, I +thought it was illness; but he seems bowed +down with grief. Every face looks awestruck! +There must be some tragedy here—something +more than the death of an individual!’ +and fearing, under this impression, +that our visit might prove untimely, we resolved +to return to the inn, and endeavour +to discover if anything unusual had really +occurred. Before we moved, I looked up at +the narrow slit—the face was no longer there; +but as we passed round to the other side of +the tower, we saw a tall, slender figure, +attired in a loose coat, pass slowly through +the wicket, cross the garden, and enter the +house. We only caught a glimpse of the profile; +the head hung down upon the breast; +the eyes were bent upon the ground; but we +knew it was the same face we had seen +above.</p> + +<p class='c006'>We went back to the inn, where our inquiries +elicited some information, which made +us wish to know more: but it was not till we +went into the town that we obtained the following +details of this mournful drama, of +which we had thus accidentally witnessed one +impressive scene.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Mr. Lovell, as Mrs. Markham had conjectured, +was a man of good family, but no +fortune; he might have had a large one, +could he have made up his mind to marry +Lady Elizabeth Wentworth, the bride selected +for him by a wealthy uncle who proposed to +make him his heir; but preferring poverty +with Emily Dering, he was disinherited. He +never repented his choice, although he remained +vicar of a small parish, and a poor man +all his life. The two children whom Mrs. +Markham had seen, were the only ones they +had, and through the excellent management of +Mrs. Lovell, and the moderation of her husband’s +desires, they had enjoyed an unusual +degree of happiness in this sort of graceful +poverty, till the young Charles and Emily were +grown up, and it was time to think what was +to be done with them. The son had been prepared +for Oxford by the father, and the +daughter, under the tuition of her mother, +was remarkably well educated and accomplished; +but it became necessary to consider +the future: Charles must be sent to college, +since the only chance of finding a provision +for him was in the Church, although the expense +of maintaining him there could be ill +afforded; so, in order in some degree to +balance the outlay, it was, after much deliberation, +agreed that Emily should accept +a situation as governess in London. The proposal +was made by herself, and the rather consented +to, that, in case of the death of her +parents, she would almost inevitably have had +to seek some such means of subsistence. These +<span class='pageno' id='Page_80'>80</span>partings were the first sorrows that had +reached the Lovells.</p> + +<p class='c006'>At first, all went well; Charles was not +wanting in ability nor in a moderate degree +of application; and Emily wrote cheerily of +her new life. She was kindly received, well +treated, and associated with the family on the +footing of a friend. Neither did further experience +seem to diminish her satisfaction. She +saw a great many gay people—some of whom +she named; and, amongst the rest, there not +unfrequently appeared the name of Herbert. +Mr. Herbert was in the army, and being a +distant connexion of the family with whom +she resided, was a frequent visitor at their +house. ‘She was sure papa and mamma +would like him.’ Once the mother smiled, +and said she hoped Emily was not falling in +love; but no more was thought of it. In the +meantime Charles had found out that there +was time for many things at Oxford, besides +study. He was naturally fond of society, and +had a remarkable capacity for excelling in +all kinds of games. He was agreeable, lively, +exceedingly handsome, and sang charmingly, +having been trained in part-singing by his +mother. No young man at Oxford was +more <i>fêté</i>; but alas! he was very poor, +and poverty poisoned all his enjoyments. +For some time he resisted temptation; but +after a terrible struggle—for he adored his +family—he gave way, and ran in debt, and +although the imprudence only augmented his +misery, he had not resolution to retrace his +steps, but advanced further and further on +this broad road to ruin, so that he had come +home for the vacation shortly before our +visit to T——, threatened with all manner of +annoyances if he did not carry back a sufficient +sum to satisfy his most clamorous +creditors. He had assured them he would +do so, but where was he to get the money? +Certainly not from his parents; he well knew +they had it not; nor had he a friend in the +world from whom he could hope assistance +in such an emergency. In his despair he often +thought of running away—going to Australia, +America, New Zealand, anywhere; but he had +not even the means to do this. He suffered indescribable +tortures, and saw no hope of relief.</p> + +<p class='c006'>It was just at this period that Herbert’s +regiment happened to be quartered at T——. +Charles had occasionally seen his name in +his sister’s letters, and heard that there +was a Herbert now in the barracks, but +he was ignorant whether or not it was +the same person; and when he accidentally +fell into the society of some of the junior +officers, and was invited by Herbert himself +to dine at the mess, pride prevented his ascertaining +the fact. He did not wish to +betray that his sister was a governess. Herbert, +however, knew full well that their visitor +was the brother of Emily Lovell, but partly +for reasons of his own, and partly because he +penetrated the weakness of the other, he abstained +from mentioning her name.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Now, this town of T—— was, and probably +is, about the dullest quarter in all England! +The officers hated it, there was no flirting, no +dancing, no hunting, no anything. Not a man +of them knew what to do with himself. The +old ones wandered about and played at whist, +the young ones took to hazard and three-card-loo, +playing at first for moderate stakes, but +soon getting on to high ones. Two or three +civilians of the neighbourhood joined the +party, Charles Lovell amongst the rest. Had +they begun with playing high, he would have +been excluded for want of funds; but whilst +they played low, he won, so that when they +increased the stakes, trusting to a continuance +of his good fortune, he was eager to go on +with them. Neither did his luck altogether +desert him; on the whole, he rather won than +lost; but he foresaw that one bad night would +break him, and he should be obliged to retire, +forfeiting his amusement and mortifying his +pride. It was just at this crisis, that, one +night, an accident, which caused him to win +a considerable sum, set him upon the notion +of turning chance into certainty. Whilst +shuffling the cards, he dropped the ace of +spades into his lap, caught it up, replaced it in +the pack, and dealt it to himself. No one +else had seen the card, no observation was +made, and a terrible thought came into his +head!</p> + +<p class='c006'>Whether loo or hazard was played, Charles +Lovell had, night after night, a most extraordinary +run of luck. He won large sums, +and saw before him the early prospect of +paying his debts and clearing all his difficulties.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Amongst the young men who played at the +table, some had plenty of money and cared +little for their losses; but others were not so +well off, and one of these was Edward Herbert. +He, too, was the son of poor parents +who had straitened themselves to put him in +the army, and it was with infinite difficulty +and privation that his widowed mother had +amassed the needful sum to purchase for him +a company, which was now becoming vacant. +The retiring officer’s papers were already sent +in, and Herbert’s money was lodged at Cox +and Greenwood’s; but before the answer from +the Horse-Guards arrived, he had lost every +sixpence. Nearly the whole sum had become +the property of Charles Lovell.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Herbert was a fine young man, honourable, +generous, impetuous, and endowed with an +acute sense of shame. He determined instantly +to pay the debts, but he knew that +his own prospects were ruined for life; he +wrote to the agents to send him the money +and withdraw his name from the list of purchasers. +But how was he to support his +mother’s grief? How meet the eye of the +girl he loved? She, who he knew adored +him, and whose hand it was agreed between +them he should ask of her parents as soon as +he was gazetted a captain! The anguish of +mind he suffered then threw him into a fever, +<span class='pageno' id='Page_81'>81</span>and he lay for several days betwixt life +and death, and happily unconscious of his +misery.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Meantime, another scene was being enacted +elsewhere. The officers, who night after night +found themselves losers, had not for some +time entertained the least idea of foul play, +but at length, one of them observing something +suspicious, began to watch, and satisfied himself, +by a peculiar method adopted by Lovell in +‘throwing his mains,’ that he was the culprit. +His suspicions were whispered from one to +another, till they nearly all entertained them, +with the exception of Herbert, who, being +looked upon as Lovell’s most especial friend, +was not told. So unwilling were these +young men to blast, for ever, the character of +the visitor whom they had so much liked, +and to strike a fatal blow at the happiness +and respectability of his family, that they +were hesitating how to proceed, whether to +openly accuse him or privately reprove and +expel him, when Herbert’s heavy loss decided +the question.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Herbert himself, overwhelmed with despair, +had quitted the room, the rest were still +seated around the table, when having given +each other a signal, one of them, called Frank +Houston, arose and said: ‘Gentlemen, it gives +me great pain to have to call your attention +to a very strange—a very distressing circumstance. +For some time past there has been an +extraordinary run of luck in one direction—we +have all observed it—all remarked on it. +Mr. Herbert has at this moment retired a +heavy loser. There is, indeed, as far as I +know, but one winner amongst us—but one, +and he a winner to a very considerable +amount; the rest all losers. God forbid, that +I should rashly accuse any man! Lightly +blast any man’s character! But I am bound +to say, that I fear the money we have lost has +not been fairly won. There has been foul +play! I forbear to name the party—the facts +sufficiently indicate him.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>Who would not have pitied Lovell, when, +livid with horror and conscious guilt, he +vainly tried to say something? ‘Indeed—I +assure you—I never’—but words would not +come; he faltered and rushed out of the room +in a transport of agony. They did pity him; +and when he was gone, agreed amongst +themselves to hush up the affair: but unfortunately, +the civilians of the party, who had +not been let into the secret, took up his +defence. They not only believed the accusation +unfounded, but felt it as an affront offered +to their townsman; they blustered about it a +good deal, and there was nothing left for it +but to appoint a committee of investigation. +Alas! the evidence was overwhelming! It +turned out that the dice and cards had been +supplied by Lovell. The former, still on the +table, were found on examination to be +loaded. In fact, he had had a pair as a +curiosity long in his possession, and had +obtained others from a disreputable character +at Oxford. No doubt remained of his +guilt.</p> + +<p class='c006'>All this while Herbert had been too ill to +be addressed on the subject; but symptoms +of recovery were now beginning to appear; +and as nobody was aware that he had any particular +interest in the Lovell family, the affair +was communicated to him. At first he refused +to believe in his friend’s guilt, and became +violently irritated. His informants assured +him they would be too happy to find they were +mistaken, but that since the inquiry no hope +of such an issue remained, and he sank into a +gloomy silence.</p> + +<p class='c006'>On the following morning, when his servant +came to his room door, he found it locked. +When, at the desire of the surgeon, it was +broken open, Herbert was found a corpse, and +a discharged pistol lying beside him. An +inquest sat upon the body, and the verdict +brought in was <i>Temporary Insanity</i>. There +never was one more just.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Preparations were now made for the funeral—that +funeral which we had witnessed; but +before the day appointed for it arrived, another +chapter of this sad story was unfolded.</p> + +<p class='c006'>When Charles left the barracks on that +fatal night, instead of going home, he passed +the dark hours in wandering wildly about the +country; but when morning dawned, fearing +the eye of man, he returned to the vicarage, +and slunk unobserved to his chamber. When +he did not appear at breakfast, his mother +sought him in his room, where she found him +in bed. He said he was very ill—and so +indeed he was—and begged to be left alone; +but as he was no better on the following day, +she insisted on sending for medical advice. +The doctor found him with all those physical +symptoms that are apt to supervene from +great anxiety of mind; and saying he could +get no sleep, Charles requested to have some +laudanum; but the physician was on his +guard, for although the parties concerned +wished to keep the thing private, some rumours +had got abroad that awakened his +caution.</p> + +<p class='c006'>The parents, meanwhile, had not the slightest +anticipation of the thunderbolt that was +about to fall upon them. They lived a very +retired life, were acquainted with none of the +officers—and they were even ignorant of the +amount of their son’s intimacy with the regiment. +Thus, when news of Herbert’s lamentable +death reached them, the mother said +to her son: ‘Charles, did you know a young +man in the barracks called Herbert; a lieutenant, +I believe? By the bye, I hope it’s not +Emily’s Mr. Herbert.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Did I know him?’ said Charles, turning +suddenly towards her, for, under pretence that +the light annoyed him, he always lay with his +face to the wall. ‘Why do you ask, mother?’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Because he’s dead. He had a fever, +and—’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Herbert dead!’ cried Charles, suddenly sitting +up in the bed.</p> + +<p class='c006'><span class='pageno' id='Page_82'>82</span>‘Yes, he had a fever, and it is supposed he +was delirious, for he blew out his brains; +there is a report that he had been playing +high, and lost a great deal of money. What’s +the matter, dear? Oh, Charles, I shouldn’t +have told you! I was not aware that you knew +him!’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Fetch my father here, and, Mother, you +come back with him!’ said Charles, speaking +with a strange sternness of tone, and wildly +motioning her out of the room.</p> + +<p class='c006'>When the parents came, he bade them sit +down beside him; and then, with a degree of +remorse and anguish that no words could +portray, he told them all; whilst they, with +blanched cheeks and fainting hearts, listened +to the dire confession.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘And here I am,’ he exclaimed, as he ended, +‘a cowardly scoundrel that has not dared to +die! Oh, Herbert! happy, happy, Herbert! +Would I were with you!’</p> + +<p class='c006'>At that moment the door opened, and a +beautiful, bright, smiling, joyous face peeped +in. It was Emily Lovell, the beloved daughter, +the adored sister, arrived from London in +compliance with a letter received a few days +previously from Herbert, wherein he had told +her that by the time she received it, he would +be a captain. She had come to introduce him +to her parents as her affianced husband. She +feared no refusal; well she knew how rejoiced +they would be to see her the wife of so kind +and honourable a man. But they were ignorant +of all this, and in the fulness of their agony, +the cup of woe ran over and she drank of the +draught! They told her all before she had +been five minutes in the room. How else +could they account for their tears, their confusion, +their bewilderment, their despair!</p> + +<p class='c006'>Before Herbert’s funeral took place, Emily +Lovell was lying betwixt life and death in a +brain fever. Under the influence of a feeling +easily to be comprehended, thirsting for a +self-imposed torture, that by its very poignancy +should relieve the dead weight of wretchedness +that lay upon his breast, Charles crept +from his bed, and slipping on a loose coat that +hung in his room, he stole across the garden +to the tower, whence, through the arrow-slit, +he witnessed the burial of his sister’s lover, +whom he had hastened to the grave.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Here terminates our sad story. We left +T—— on the following morning, and it was two +or three years before any further intelligence +of the Lovell family reached us. All we +then heard was, that Charles had gone, a +self-condemned exile, to Australia; and that +Emily had insisted on accompanying him +thither.</p> + +<div class='chapter'> + <h2 class='c004'>DREAM WITHIN DREAM; OR, EVIL MINIMISED.</h2> +</div> + +<div class='lg-container-b c007'> + <div class='linegroup'> + <div class='group'> + <div class='line'>What evil would be, could it be, the Blest</div> + <div class='line'>Are sometimes fain to know. They sink to rest,</div> + <div class='line'>Dream, for one moment’s space, of care and strife,</div> + <div class='line'>Wake, stare, and smile; and this is Human Life.</div> + </div> + </div> +</div> + +<div class='chapter'> + <h2 class='c004'>THE SCHOOLMASTER AT HOME AND ABROAD.</h2> +</div> + +<p class='c005'>The lamentable deficiency of the commonest +rudiments of education, which still exists +among the humbler classes of this nation, is +never so darkly apparent as when we compare +their condition with that of people of +similar rank in other countries. When we do +so, we find that England stands the lowest in +the scale of what truly must be looked upon as +<i>Civilisation</i>; for she provides fewer means for +promoting it than any of her neighbours. With +us, education is a commodity to be trafficked +in: abroad, it is a duty. Here, schoolmasters +are perfectly irresponsible except to their +paymasters: in other countries, teachers are +appointed by the state, and a rigid supervision +is maintained over the trainers of youth, both +as regards competency and moral conduct. +In England, whoever is too poor to buy the +article education, can get none of it for himself +or his offspring: in other parts of Europe, +either the government (as in Germany), or +public opinion (as in America), enforces it +upon the youthful population.</p> + +<p class='c006'>What are the consequences? One is revealed +by a comparison between the proportion +of scholars in elementary schools to the +entire population of other countries, and that +in our own. Taking the whole of northern +Europe—including Scotland—and France and +Belgium (where education is at a low ebb), we +find that to every 2¼ of the population, there +is one child acquiring the rudiments of knowledge; +while in England there is only one +such pupil to every <i>fourteen</i> inhabitants.</p> + +<p class='c006'>It has been calculated that there are, at +the present day in England and Wales, nearly +8,000,000 persons who can neither read nor +write—that is to say, nearly one quarter of +the population. Also, that of all the children +between five and fourteen, more than one +half attend no place of instruction. These +statements—compiled by Mr. Kay, from official +and other authentic sources, for his work +on the Social Condition and Education of the +Poor in England and Europe, would be hard +to believe, if we had not to encounter in our +every-day life degrees of illiteracy which +would be startling, if we were not thoroughly +used to it. Wherever we turn, ignorance, +not always allied to poverty, stares us in +the face. If we look in the Gazette, at the +list of partnerships dissolved, not a month +passes but some unhappy man, rolling perhaps +in wealth, but wallowing in ignorance, +is put to the <i>experimentum crucis</i> of ‘his +mark.’ The number of petty jurors—in +rural districts especially—who can only sign +with a cross is enormous. It is not unusual +to see parish documents of great local importance +defaced with the same humiliating +symbol by persons whose office shows them +to be not only ‘men of mark,’ but men of +substance. We have printed already specimens +of the partial ignorance which passes +<span class='pageno' id='Page_83'>83</span>under the ken of the Post Office authorities, +and we may venture to assert, that such specimens +of penmanship and orthography are +not to be matched in any other country in +Europe. A housewife in humble life need only +turn to the file of her tradesmen’s bills to +discover hieroglyphics which render them +so many arithmetical puzzles. In short, the +practical evidences of the low ebb to which +the plainest rudiments of education in this +country has fallen, are too common to bear +repetition. We cannot pass through the +streets, we cannot enter a place of public +assembly, or ramble in the fields, without the +gloomy shadow of Ignorance sweeping over us. +The rural population is indeed in a worse +plight than the other classes. We quote—with +the attestation of our own experience—the +following passage from one of a series +of articles which have recently appeared +in a morning newspaper:—‘Taking the +adult class of agricultural labourers, it is +almost impossible to exaggerate the ignorance +in which they live and move and +have their being. As they work in the +fields, the external world has some hold upon +them through the medium of their senses; +but to all the higher exercises of intellect, +they are perfect strangers. You cannot +address one of them without being at once +painfully struck with the intellectual darkness +which enshrouds him. There is in +general neither speculation in his eyes, nor +intelligence in his countenance. The whole +expression is more that of an animal than of +a man. He is wanting, too, in the erect and +independent bearing of a man. When you +accost him, if he is not insolent—which he +seldom is—he is timid and shrinking, his +whole manner showing that he feels himself +at a distance from you, greater than should +separate any two classes of men. He is often +doubtful when you address, and suspicious +when you question him; he is seemingly +oppressed with the interview, while it lasts, +and obviously relieved when it is over. These +are the traits which I can affirm them to +possess as a class, after having come in contact +with many hundreds of farm labourers. +They belong to a generation for whose intellectual +culture little or nothing was done. +As a class, they have no amusements beyond +the indulgence of sense. In nine cases out of +ten, recreation is associated in their minds +with nothing higher than sensuality. I have +frequently asked clergymen and others, if +they often find the adult peasant reading for +his own or others’ amusement? The invariable +answer is, that such a sight is seldom +or never witnessed. In the first place, <i>the great +bulk of them cannot read</i>. In the next, a large +proportion of those who can, do so with too +much difficulty to admit of the exercise being +an amusement to them. Again, few of those +who can read with comparative ease, have the +taste for doing so. It is but justice to them to +say, that many of those who cannot read, have +bitterly regretted, in my hearing, their inability +to do so. I shall never forget the tone in which +an old woman in Cornwall intimated to me +what a comfort it would now be to her, could +she only read her Bible in her lonely hours.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>We now turn to the high lights of the +picture as presented abroad, and which, from +their very brightness, throw our own intellectual +gloom into deeper shade. Mr. Kay +observes in the work we have already cited—</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘It is a great fact, however much we may +be inclined to doubt it, that throughout +Prussia, Saxony, Bavaria, Bohemia, Wirtemberg, +Baden, Hesse Darmstadt, Hesse Cassel, +Gotha, Nassau, Hanover, Denmark, Switzerland, +Norway, and the Austrian Empire, all +the children are actually at this present time +attending school, and are receiving a careful, +religious, moral, and intellectual education, +from highly educated and efficient teachers. +Over the vast tract of country which I have +mentioned, as well as in Holland, and the +greater part of France, <i>all</i> the children above +six years of age are daily acquiring useful +knowledge and good habits under the <i>influence</i> +of moral, religious, and learned teachers. <span class='sc'>All</span> +the youth of the greater part of these +countries, below the age of twenty-one years, +can read, write, and cypher, and know the Bible +History, and the history of their own country. +No children are left idle and dirty in the +streets of the towns—there is no class of +children to be compared in any respect to the +children who frequent our “ragged schools”——all +the children, even of the poorest parents, +are, in a great part of these countries, in +dress, appearance, cleanliness, and manners, as +polished and civilised as the children of our +middle classes; the children of the poor in +Germany are so civilised that the rich often +send their children to the schools intended +for the poor; and, lastly, in a great part of +Germany and Switzerland, the children of +the poor are receiving a <i>better</i> education than +that given in England to the children of the +greater part of our middle classes.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘I remember one day,’ says Mr. Kay in +another page, ‘when walking near Berlin in +the company of Herr Hintz, a professor in +Dr. Diesterweg’s Normal College, and of +another teacher, we saw a poor woman cutting +up, in the road, logs of wood for winter +use. My companions pointed her out to me +and said, “Perhaps you will scarcely believe +it, but in the neighbourhood of Berlin, poor +women, like that one, read translations of +Sir Walter Scott’s Novels, and many of the +interesting works of your language, besides +those of the principal writers of Germany.” +This account was afterwards confirmed by +the testimony of several other persons. Often +and often have I seen the poor cab-drivers of +Berlin, while waiting for a fare, amusing +themselves by reading German books, which +they had brought with them in the morning, +expressly for the purpose of supplying amusement +and occupation for their leisure hours. +<span class='pageno' id='Page_84'>84</span>In many parts of these countries, the peasants +and the workmen of the towns attend regular +weekly lectures or weekly classes, where +they practise singing or chanting, or learn +mechanical drawing, history, or science. The +intelligence of the poorer classes of these +countries is shown by their manners. The +whole appearance of a German peasant who +has been brought up under this system, <i>i. e.</i> +of any of the poor who have not attained +the age of thirty-five years, is very different +to that of our own peasantry. The German, +Swiss, or Dutch peasant, who has grown up +to manhood under the new system, and since +the old feudal system was overthrown, is not +nearly so often, as with us, distinguished by +an uncouth dialect. On the contrary, they +speak as their teachers speak, clearly, without +hesitation, and grammatically. They answer +questions politely, readily, and with the ease +which shows they have been accustomed to +mingle with men of greater wealth and of +better education than themselves. They do +not appear embarrassed, still less do they +appear gawkish or stupid, when addressed. +If, in asking a peasant a question, a stranger, +according to the polite custom of the country, +raises his hat, the first words of reply are the +quietly uttered ones, “I pray you, Sir, be +covered.” A Prussian peasant is always +polite and respectful to a stranger, but quite +as much at his ease as when speaking to one +of his own fellows.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>Surely the contrast presented between the +efforts of the schoolmaster abroad and his +inactivity at home—refuting, as it does, our +hourly boastings of ‘intellectual progress,’—should +arouse us, energetically and practically, +to the work of Educational extension.</p> + +<div class='chapter'> + <h2 class='c004'>THE LADY ALICE.</h2> +</div> + +<div class='lg-container-b c007'> + <div class='linegroup'> + <div class='group'> + <div class='line in21'>I.</div> + <div class='line'>What doth the Lady Alice so late on the turret-stair,</div> + <div class='line'>Without a lamp to light her but the diamond in her hair;</div> + <div class='line'>When every arching passage overflows with shallow gloom,</div> + <div class='line'>And dreams float through the castle, into every silent room?</div> + </div> + <div class='group'> + <div class='line'>She trembles at her footsteps, although their fall is light;</div> + <div class='line'>For through the turret-loopholes she sees the murky night,—</div> + <div class='line'>Black, broken vapours streaming across the stormy skies,—</div> + <div class='line'>Along the empty corridors the moaning tempest cries.</div> + </div> + <div class='group'> + <div class='line'>She steals along a gallery, she pauses by a door;</div> + <div class='line'>And fast her tears are dropping down upon the oaken floor;</div> + <div class='line'>And thrice she seems returning,—but thrice she turns again;—</div> + <div class='line'>Now heavy lie the cloud of sleep on that old father’s brain!</div> + </div> + <div class='group'> + <div class='line'>Oh, well it were that <i>never</i> thou should’st waken from thy sleep!</div> + <div class='line'>For wherefore should they waken who waken but to weep?</div> + <div class='line'>No more, no more beside thy bed may Peace her vigil keep;</div> + <div class='line'>Thy sorrow, like a lion, waits<a id='r1'></a><a href='#f1' class='c008'><sup>[1]</sup></a> upon its prey to leap.</div> + </div> + <div class='group'> + <div class='line in21'>II.</div> + <div class='line'>An afternoon in April. No sun appears on high;</div> + <div class='line'>A moist and yellow lustre fills the deepness of the sky;</div> + <div class='line'>And through the castle gateway, with slow and solemn tread,</div> + <div class='line'>Along the leafless avenue they bear the honoured dead.</div> + </div> + <div class='group'> + <div class='line'>They stop. The long line closes up, like some gigantic worm;</div> + <div class='line'>A shape is standing in the path; a wan and ghostlike form;</div> + <div class='line'>Which gazes fixedly, nor moves; nor utters any sound;</div> + <div class='line'>Then, like a statue built of snow, falls lifeless to the ground.</div> + </div> + <div class='group'> + <div class='line'>And though her clothes are ragged, and though her feet are bare;</div> + <div class='line'>And though all wild and tangled, falls her heavy silk-brown hair;</div> + <div class='line'>Though from her eyes the brightness, from her cheeks the bloom, has fled;</div> + <div class='line'>They know their Lady Alice, the Darling of the Dead.</div> + </div> + <div class='group'> + <div class='line'>With silence, in her own old room the fainting form they lay;</div> + <div class='line'>Where all things stand unaltered since the night she fled away;</div> + <div class='line'>But who shall bring to life again her father from the clay?</div> + <div class='line'>But who shall give her back again her heart of that old day?</div> + </div> + </div> +</div> + +<div class='footnote' id='f1'> +<p class='c006'><a href='#r1'>1</a>. The lion was said to ‘prey on nothing that doth seem +as dead.’</p> +</div> + +<div class='chapter'> + <h2 class='c004'>ILLUSTRATIONS OF CHEAPNESS.<br> <span class='large'>A GLOBE.</span></h2> +</div> + +<p class='c005'>One of the most remarkable of self-educated +men, James Ferguson, when a poor agricultural +labourer, constructed a globe. A friend +had made him a present of ‘Gordon’s Geographical +Grammar,’ which, he says, ‘at that +time was to me a great treasure. There is no +figure of a globe in it, although it contains a +tolerable description of the globes, and their +use. From this description I made a globe in +three weeks, at my father’s, having turned +the ball thereof out of a piece of wood; which +ball I covered with paper, and delineated a +map of the world upon it, made the meridian +ring and horizon of wood, covered them with +paper, and graduated them; and was happy +to find that by my globe (which was the first +I ever saw) I could solve the problems.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘But,’ he adds, ‘this was not likely to afford +me bread.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>In a few years this ingenious man discovered +the conditions upon which he could earn his +bread, by a skill which did not suffer under +<span class='pageno' id='Page_85'>85</span>the competition of united labour. He had +made also a wooden clock. He carried about +his globe and his clock, and ‘began to pick up +some money about the country’ by cleaning +clocks. He became a skilled clock-cleaner. +For six-and-twenty years afterwards he earned +his bread as an artist. He then became a +scientific lecturer, and in connection with his +pursuits, was also a globe maker. His name +may be seen upon old globes, associated with +that of Senex. The demand for globes must +have been then very small, but Ferguson had +learned that cheapness is produced by labour-saving +contrivances. A pretty instrument for +graduating lines upon the meridian ring, once +belonging to Ferguson, is in use at this hour +in the manufactory of Messrs. Malby and Son. +The poor lad ‘who made a globe in three +weeks’ finally won the honours and riches +that were due to his genius and industry. +But he would never have earned a living in +the continuance of his first attempt to turn a +ball out of a piece of wood, cover it with paper, +and draw a map of the world upon it. The +nicest application of his individual skill, and +the most careful employment of his scientific +knowledge, would have been wasted upon +those portions of the work in which the continued +application of common routine labour +is the most efficient instrument of production.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Let us contrast the successive steps of +Ferguson’s first experiment in globe-making +with the processes of a globe manufactory.</p> + +<p class='c006'>A globe is not made of ‘a ball turned out of +a piece of wood.’ If a solid ball of large +dimensions were so turned, it would be too +heavy for ordinary use. Erasmus said of one +of the books of Thomas Aquinas, ‘No man can +carry it about, much less get it into his head;’ +and so would it be said of a solid globe. If it +were made of hollow wood, it would warp and +split at the junction of its parts. A globe is +made of paper and plaster. It is a beautiful +combination of solidity and lightness. It is +perfectly balanced upon its axis. It retains +its form under every variety of temperature. +Time affects it less than most other works of +art. It is as durable as a Scagliola column.</p> + +<p class='c006'>A globe may not, at first sight, appear a +cheap production. It is not, of necessity, a +low-priced production, and yet it is essentially +cheap; for nearly all the principles of manufacture +that are conditions of cheapness are +exhibited in the various stages of its construction. +There are only four globe-makers in +England and one in Scotland. The annual +sale of globes is only about a thousand pair. +The price of a pair of globes varies from six +shillings to fifty pounds. But from the +smallest 2-inch, to the largest 36-inch globe, +a systematic process is carried on at every +step of its formation. We select this Illustration +of Cheapness as a contrast, in relation to +price and extent of demand, to the Lucifer +Match. But it is, at the same time, a parallel +in principle. If a globe were not made upon +a principle involving the scientific combination +of skilled labour, it would be a mere +article of luxury from its excessive costliness. +It is now a most useful instrument in education. +For educational purposes the most inexpensive +globe is as valuable as that of the +highest price. All that properly belongs to +the excellence of the instrument is found in +combination with the commonest stained +wood frame, as perfectly as with the most +highly-finished frame of rose-wood or mahogany.</p> + +<p class='c006'>The mould, if we may so express it, of a globe +is turned out of a piece of wood. This sphere +need not be mathematically accurate. It is +for rough work, and flaws and cracks are of +little consequence. This wooden ball has an +axis, a piece of iron wire at each pole. And +here we may remark, that, at every stage of +the process, the revolution of a sphere upon +its axis, under the hands of the workman, is +the one great principle which renders every +operation one of comparative ease and simplicity. +The labour would be enormously multiplied +if the same class of operations had to +be performed upon a cube. The solid mould, +then, of the embryo globe is placed on its axis +in a wooden frame. In a very short time a +boy will form a pasteboard globe upon its +surface. He first covers it entirely with strips +of strong paper, thoroughly wet, which are in +a tub of water at his side. The slight inequalities +produced by the over-lapping of the +strips are immaterial. The saturated paper +is not suffered to dry; but is immediately +covered over with a layer of pasted paper, +also cut in long narrow slips. A third layer +of similarly pasted paper—brown paper and +white being used alternately—is applied; and +then, a fourth, a fifth and a sixth. Here the +pasting process ends for globes of moderate +size. For the large ones it is carried farther. +This wet pasteboard ball has now to be dried,—placed +upon its axis in a rack. If we were +determined to follow the progress of this individual +ball through all its stages, we should +have to wait a fortnight before it advanced +another step. But as the large factory of +Messrs. Malby and Son has many scores of +globes all rolling onward to perfection, we +shall be quite satisfied to witness the next +operation performed upon a pasteboard sphere +that began to exist some weeks earlier, and is +now hard to the core.</p> + +<p class='c006'>The wooden ball, with its solid paper +covering, is placed on its axis. A sharp +cutting instrument, fixed on a bench, is brought +into contact with the surface of the sphere, +which is made to revolve. In less time than +we write, the pasteboard ball is cut in half. +There is no adhesion to the wooden mould, for +the first coating of paper was simply <i>wetted</i>. +Two bowls of thick card now lie before us, +with a small hole in each, made by the axis of +the wooden ball. But a junction is very soon +effected. Within every globe there is a piece +of wood—we may liken it to a round ruler—of +the exact length of the inner surface of the +<span class='pageno' id='Page_86'>86</span>sphere from pole to pole. A thick wire runs +through this wood, and originally projected +some two or three inches at each end. This +stick is placed upright in a vice. The semi-globe +is nailed to one end of the stick, upon +which it rests, when the wire is passed +through its centre. It is now reversed, and +the edges of the card rapidly covered with +glue. The edges of the other semi-globe are +instantly brought into contact, the other end +of the wire passing through its centre in the +same way, and a similar nailing to the stick +taking place. We have now a paper globe, +with its own axis, which will be its companion +for the whole term of its existence.</p> + +<p class='c006'>The paper globe is next placed on its axis +in a frame, of which one side is a semi-circular +piece of metal;—the horizon of a globe cut in +half would show its form. A tub of white +composition,—a compound of whiting, glue, +and oil is on the bench. The workman dips +his hand into this ‘gruel thick and slab,’ and +rapidly applies it to the paper sphere with +tolerable evenness: but as it revolves, the +semi-circle of metal clears off the superfluous +portions. The ball of paper is now a ball of +plaster externally. Time again enters largely +into the manufacture. The first coating must +thoroughly dry before the next is applied; +and so again till the process has been repeated +four or five times. Thus, when we visit a +globe workshop, we are at first surprised at +the number of white balls, from three inches +diameter to three feet, which occupy a large +space. They are all steadily advancing towards +completion. They cannot be hurriedly dried. +The duration of their quiescent state must +depend upon the degrees of the thermometer +in the ordinary atmosphere. They cost +little. They consume nothing beyond a small +amount of rent. As they advance to the +dignity of perfect spheres, increased pains are +taken in the application of the plaster. At +last they are polished. Their surface is as +hard and as fine as ivory. But, beautiful as +they are, they may, like many other beautiful +things, want a due equipoise. They must be +perfectly balanced. They must move upon +their poles with the utmost exactness. A few +shot, let in here and there, correct all irregularities. +And now the paper and plaster +sphere is to be endued with intelligence.</p> + +<p class='c006'>What may be called the artistical portion +of globe-making here commences. In the +manufactory we are describing there are two +skilled workers, who may take rank as artists, +but whose skill is limited, and at the same time +perfected, by the uniformity of their operations. +One of these artists, a young woman, +who has been familiar with the business from +her earliest years, takes the polished globe +in her lap, for the purpose of marking it with +lines of direction for covering it with engraved +strips, which will ultimately form a perfect +map. The inspection of a finished globe will +show that the larger divisions of longitude are +expressed by lines drawn from pole to pole, +and those of latitude by a series of concentric +rings. The polished plaster has to be covered +with similar lines. These lines are struck +with great rapidity, and with mathematical +truth, by an instrument called a ‘beam compass,’ +in the use of which this workwoman is +most expert. The sphere is now ready for +receiving the map, which is engraved in fourteen +distinct pieces. The arctic and antarctic +poles form two circular pieces, from which the +lines of longitude radiate. These having been +fitted and pasted, one of the remaining twelve +pieces, containing 30 degrees, is also pasted on +the sphere, in the precise space where the lines +of longitude have been previously marked, its +lines of latitude corresponding in a similar +manner. The paper upon which these portions +of the earth’s surface are engraved is thin and +extremely tough. It is rubbed down with the +greatest care, through all the stages of this +pasting process. We have at length a globe +covered with a plain map, so perfectly joined +that every line and every letter fit together as +if they had been engraved in one piece,—which, +of course, would be absolutely impossible for +the purpose of covering a ball.</p> + +<p class='c006'>The artist who thus covers the globe, called +a paster, is also a colourer. This is, of necessity, +a work which cannot be carried on with +any division of labour. It is not so with the +colouring of an atlas. A map passes under +many hands in the colouring. A series of +children, each using one colour, produce in +combination a map coloured in all its parts, +with the rapidity and precision of a machine. +But a globe must be coloured by one hand. +It is curious to observe the colourer working +without a pattern. By long experience the +artist knows how the various boundaries are +to be defined, with pink continents, and blue +islands, and the green oceans, connecting the +most distant regions. To a contemplative +mind, how many thoughts must go along with +the mark, as he covers Europe with indications +of popular cities, and has little to do +with Africa and Australia but to mark the +coast lines;—as year after year he has to +make some variation in the features of the +great American continent, which indicates the +march of the human family over once trackless +deserts, whilst the memorable places of +the ancient world undergo few changes but +those of name. And then, as he is finishing a +globe for the cabin of some ‘great ammirall,’ +may he not think that, in some frozen nook +of the Arctic Sea, the friendly Esquimaux may +come to gaze upon his work, and seeing how +pretty a spot England is upon the ball, wonder +what illimitable riches nature spontaneously +produces in that favoured region, some of +which is periodically scattered by her ships +through those dreary climes in the search for +some unknown road amidst everlasting icebergs, +while he would gladly find a short track +to the sunny south. And then, perhaps, +higher thoughts may come into his mind; +and as this toy of a world grows under his +<span class='pageno' id='Page_87'>87</span>fingers, and as he twists it around upon its +material axis, he may think of the great artificer +of the universe, having the feeling, if not +knowing, the words of the poet:—</p> + +<div class='lg-container-b c009'> + <div class='linegroup'> + <div class='group'> + <div class='line'>‘In ambient air this ponderous ball <span class='sc'>He</span> hung.’</div> + </div> + </div> +</div> + +<p class='c006'>Contemplative, or not, the colourer steadily +pursues his uniform labour, and the sphere is +at length fully coloured.</p> + +<p class='c006'>The globe has now to be varnished with a +preparation technically known as ‘white +hard,’ to which some softening matter is +added to prevent the varnish cracking. This +is a secret which globe-makers preserve. +Four coats of varnish complete the work.</p> + +<p class='c006'>And next the ball has to be mounted. We +have already mentioned an instrument by +which the brass meridian ring is accurately +graduated; that is, marked with lines representing +360 degrees, with corresponding +numerals. Of whatever size the ring is, an +index-hand, connected with the graduating +instrument, shows the exact spot where the +degree is to be marked with a graver. The +operation is comparatively rapid; but for the +largest globes it involves considerable expense. +After great trouble, the ingenious men whose +manufactory we are describing have succeeded +in producing cast-iron rings, with the +degrees and figures perfectly distinct; and +these applied to 36-inch globes, instead of the +engraved meridians, make a difference of ten +guineas in their price. For furniture they +are not so beautiful; for use they are quite +as valuable. There is only one other process +which requires great nicety. The axis of the +globe revolves on the meridian ring, and of +course it is absolutely necessary that the poles +should be exactly parallel. This is effected by +a little machine which drills each extremity +at one and the same instant; and the operation +is termed poling the meridian.</p> + +<p class='c006'>The mounting of the globe,—the completion +of a pair of globes,—is now handed over to +the cabinet-maker. The cost of the material +and the elaboration of the workmanship +determine the price.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Before we conclude, we would say a few +words as to the limited nature of the demand +for globes.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Our imperfect description of this manufacture +will have shown that experience, and +constant application of ingenuity, have succeeded +in reducing to the lowest amount the +labour employed in the production of globes. +The whole population of English globe-makers +does not exceed thirty or forty men, women, +and boys. Globes are thus produced at the +lowest rate of cheapness, as regards the +number of labourers, and with very moderate +profits to the manufacturer, on account of the +smallness of his returns. The <i>durability</i> of +globes is one great cause of the limitation +of the demand. Changes of fashion, or +caprices of taste, as to the mounting—new +geographical discoveries, and modern information +as to the position and nomenclature of +the stars—may displace a few old globes +annually, which then find their way from +brokers’ shops into a class somewhat below +that of their original purchasers. But the +pair of globes generally maintain for years +their original position in the school-room or +the library. They are rarely injured, and +suffer very slight decay. The new purchasers +represent that portion of society which is +seeking after knowledge, or desires to manifest +some pretension to intellectual tastes. The +number of globes annually sold represents to +a certain extent the advance of Education. +But if the labour-saving expedients did not +exist in the manufacture the cost would be +much higher, and the purchasers greatly reduced +in number. The contrivances by which +comparative cheapness is produced arise out +of the necessity of contending against the +durability of the article by encouraging +a new demand. If these did not exist, +the supply would outrun the demand;—the +price of the article would less and less repay +the labour expended in its production; the +manufacture of globes would cease till the old +globes were worn out, and the few rich and +scientific purchasers had again raised up a +market.</p> + +<div class='chapter'> + <h2 class='c004'>THE GHOST OF THE LATE MR. JAMES BARBER.<br> <span class='large'>A YARN ASHORE.</span></h2> +</div> + +<p class='c005'>‘“Luck!” nonsense. There is no such +thing. Life is not a game of chance any more +than chess is. If you lose, you have no one +but yourself to blame.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>This was said by a young lieutenant in the +Royal Navy, to a middle-aged midshipman, +his elder brother.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Do you mean to say that luck had nothing +to do with Fine Gentleman Bobbin passing for +lieutenant, and my being turned back?’ was +the rejoinder.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Bobbin, though a dandy, is a good seaman, +and—and——.’ The speaker looked another +way, and hesitated.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘I am <i>not</i>, you would add—if you had +courage. But I say I am, and a better seaman +than Bobbin.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Practically, perhaps, for you are ten years +older in the service. But it was in the theoretical +part of seamanship—which is equally +important—that you broke down before the +examiners,’ continued the younger officer, +in tones of earnest but sorrowful reproach. +‘You never <i>would</i> study.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘I’ll tell you what it is, master Ferdinand,’ +said the elderly middy, not without a show +of displeasure. ‘I don’t think this is the +correct sort of conversation to be going on +between two brothers after a five years’ +separation.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>The young lieutenant laid his hand soothingly +on his brother’s arm, and entreated +him to take what he said in good part.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Well, well!’ rejoined the middy, with a +<span class='pageno' id='Page_88'>88</span>laugh half-forced. ‘Take care what you are +about, or, by Jove, I’ll inform against you.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘What for?’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Why, for preaching without a license.—Besides, +you were once as bad as you pretend +I am.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘I own it with sorrow; but I was warned +in time by the wretched end of poor James +Barber——’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Of whom?’ asked the elder brother, starting +back as he pushed his glass along the table. +‘You don’t mean Jovial Jemmy, as we used +to call him; once my messmate in the brig +“Rollock.”’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Yes, I do.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘What! dead?’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Yes.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Why, it was one of our great delights, when +in harbour and on shore, to “go the rounds,”—as +he called it—with Jovial Jemmy. He +understood life from stem to stern—from +truck to keel. He knew everybody, from the +First Lord downwards. I have seen him recognised +by <i>the</i> Duke one minute, and the next +pick up with a strolling player, and familiarly +treat him at a tavern. He once took me to a +quadrille party at the Duchess of Durrington’s, +where he seemed to know and be known to +everybody present, and then adjourned to the +Cider Cellars, where he was equally intimate +with all sorts of queer characters. Though a +favourite among the aristocracy, he was equally +welcome in less exclusive societies. He was +“Brother,” “Past Master,” “Warden,” “Noble +Grand,” or “President” of all sorts of Lodges +and Fraternities. Uncommonly knowing was +Jemmy in all sorts of club and fashionable +gossip. He knew who gave the best dinners, +and was always invited to the best balls. +He was a capital judge of champagne, and +when he betted upon a horse-race everybody +backed him. He could hum all the fashionable +songs, and was the fourth man who could +dance the polka when it was first imported. +Then he was as profound in bottled stout, +Welsh rabbits, Burton ale, devilled kidneys, +and bowls of Bishop, as he was in Roman +punch, French cookery, and Italian singers. +Afloat, he was the soul of fun:—he got +up all our private theatricals, told all the +best stories, and sung comic songs that made +even the Purser laugh.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘An extent and variety of knowledge and +accomplishments,’ said Lieutenant Fid, ‘which +had the precise effect of blasting his prospects +in life. He was, as you remember, at last +dismissed the service for intemperance and +incompetence.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘When did you see him last?’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘What, <i>alive</i>?’ inquired Ferdinand Fid, +changing countenance.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Of course! Surely you do not mean to +insinuate that you have seen his ghost!’</p> + +<p class='c006'>The lieutenant was silent; and the midshipman +took a deep draught of his favourite +mixture—equal portions of rum and water—and +hinted to his younger brother, the lieutenant, +the expediency of immediately confiding +the story to the Marines; for he declined +to credit it. He then ventured another recommendation, +which was, that Ferdinand +should throw the impotent temperance tipple +he was then imbibing ‘over the side of the +Ship’—which meant the tavern of that name +in Greenwich, at the open bow-window of +which they were then sitting—and clear his +intellects by something stronger.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘I can afford to be laughed at,’ said the +younger Fid, ‘because I have gained immeasurably +by the delusion, if it be one; but +if ever there was a ghost, I have seen the +ghost of James Barber. I, like yourself and +he, was nearly ruined by love of amusement +and intemperance, when he—or whatever +else it might have been—came to my aid.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Let us hear. I see I am “in” for a ghost +story.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Well; it was eighteen forty-one when I +came home in the “Arrow” with despatches +from the coast of Africa: you were lying in +the Tagus in the “Bobstay.” Ours, you know, +was rather a thirsty station; a man inclined +for it comes home from the Slaving Coasts +with a determination to make up his lee way. +I did mine with a vengeance. As usual, I +looked up “Jovial Jemmy.”’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘’Twas easy to find him if you knew where +to go.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘I <i>did</i> know, and went. He had by that +time got tired of his more aristocratic friends. +Respectability was too “slow” for him, so I +found him presiding over the “Philanthropic +Raspers,” at the “Union Jack.” He received +me with open arms, and took me, as you say, +the “rounds.” I can’t recal that week’s dissipation +without a shudder. We rushed about +from ball to tavern, from theatre to supper-room, +from club to gin-palace, as if our lives +depended on losing not a moment. We had +not time to walk, so we galloped about in cabs. +On the fourth night, when I was beginning to +feel knocked up, and tired of the same songs, +the same quadrilles, the bad whiskey, the +suffocating tobacco smoke, and the morning’s +certain and desperate penalties, I remarked +to Jemmy, that it was a miracle how he had +managed to weather it for so many years. +“What a hardship you would deem it,” I +added, “if you were <i>obliged</i> to go the same +weary round from one year’s end to another.”’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘What did he say to that?’ asked Philip.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Why, I never saw him so taken aback. +He looked quite fiercely at me, and replied, +“I <i>am</i> obliged!”’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘How did he make that out?’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Why, he had tippled and dissipated his +constitution into such a state that use had +become second nature. Excitement was his +natural condition, and he dared not become +quite sober for fear of a total collapse—or +dropping down like a shot in the water.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>The midshipman had his glass in his hand, +but forebore to taste it.—‘Well, what then?’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘The “rounds” lasted two nights longer. +<span class='pageno' id='Page_89'>89</span>I was fairly beaten. Cast-iron could not have +stood it. I was prostrated in bed with fever—and +worse.’ Ferdinand was agitated, and +took a large draught of his lemonade.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Well, well, you need not enlarge upon that,’ +replied Phil Fid, raising his glass towards his +lips, but again thinking better of it; ‘I heard +how bad you were from Seton, who shaved +your head.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘I had scarcely recovered when the “Arrow” +was ordered back, and I made a vow.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Took the pledge, perhaps!’ interjected +the mid, with a slight curl of his lip.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘No! I determined to work more and play +less. We had a capital naval instructor +aboard, and our commander was as good an +officer as ever trod the deck. I studied—a +little too hard perhaps, for I was laid up +again. The “Arrow” was, as usual, as good as +her name, and we shot across to Jamaica in +five weeks. One evening as we were lying in +Kingston harbour, Seton, who had come over +to join the Commodore as full surgeon, told +me what he had never ventured to divulge +before.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘What was that?’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Why, that, on the very day I left London, +James Barber died of a frightful attack of +<i>delirium tremens</i>!’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Poor Jemmy!’ said the elder Fid sorrowfully, +taking a long pull of consolation from +his rummer. ‘Little did I think, while singing +some of your best songs off Belem Castle, that +I had seen you for the last time!’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘<i>I</i> hadn’t seen him for the last time,’ returned +the lieutenant, with awful significance.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Philip assumed a careless air, and said, +‘Go on.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘We were ordered home in eighteen forty-five, +and paid off in January. I went to +Portsmouth; was examined, and passed as +lieutenant.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>This allusion to his brother’s better condition +made poor Philip look rather blank.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘On being confirmed at the Admiralty,’ +continued Ferdinand, ‘I had to give a +dinner to the “Arrows;” which I did at the +Salopian, Charing Cross. In the excess of +my joy at promotion, my determination of +temperance and avoidance of what is called +“society” was swamped. I kept it up once +more; I went the “rounds,” and accepted +all the dinner, supper, and ball invitations I +could get, invariably ending each morning +in one of the old haunts of dissipation. Old +associations with James Barber returned, and +like causes produced similar effects. One +morning while maundering home, I began to +feel the same wild confusion as had previously +commenced my dreadful malady.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Ah! a little touched in the top-hamper.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘It was just daylight. Thinking to cool +myself, I jumped into a wherry to get pulled +down here to Greenwich.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Of course you were not quite sober.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Don’t ask! I do not like even to allude +to my sensations, for fear of recalling them. +My brain seemed in a flame. The boat appeared +to be going at the rate of twenty miles +an hour. Fast as we were cleaving the current, +I heard my name distinctly called out. +I reconnoitred, but could see nobody. I looked +over on one side of the gunwale, and, while +doing so, felt something touch me from the +other; I felt a chill; I turned round and +saw——’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Whom?’ asked the midshipman, holding +his breath.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘What seemed to be James Barber.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Was he wet?’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘As dry as you are.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘I summoned courage to speak. “Hallo! +some mistake!” I exclaimed.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘“Not at all,” was the reply. “I’m James +Barber. Don’t be frightened, I’m harmless.”</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘“But——”</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘“I know what you are going to say,” interrupted +the intruder. “Seton did not deceive +you—I am only an occasional visitor <i>up +here</i>.”</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘This brought me up with a round turn, +and I had sense enough to wish my friend +would vanish as he came. “Where shall we +land you?” I asked.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘“Oh, any where—it don’t matter. I have +got to be out every night and all night; and +the nights are plaguy long just now.”</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘I could not muster a word.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘“Ferd Fid,” continued the voice, which +now seemed about fifty fathoms deep; and fast +as we were dropping down the stream, the +boat gave a heel to starboard, as if she had +been broadsided by a tremendous wave—“Ferd +Fid, you recollect how I used to kill time; how I +sang, drank, danced, and supped all night long, +and then slept and soda-watered it all day? +You remember what a happy fellow I seemed. +Fools like yourself thought I was so; but I +say again, I wasn’t,” growled the voice, letting +itself down a few fathoms deeper. “Often +and often I would have given the world to +have been a market-gardener or a dealer in +chick-weed while roaring ‘He is a jolly good +fellow,’ and ‘We won’t go home till morning!’ +as I emerged with a group from some +tavern into Covent Garden market. But I’m +punished fearfully for my sins now. What +do you think I have got to do every night of +my—never mind—what do you think is now +marked out as my dreadful punishment?”</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘“Well, to walk the earth, I suppose,” said I.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘“No.”</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘“To paddle about in the Thames from sunset +to sun-rise?”</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘“Worse. Ha! ha!” (his laugh sounded +like the booming of a gong). “I only wish +my doom <i>was</i> merely to be a mud-lark. No, +no, I’m condemned to rush about from +one evening party and public house to +another. At the former I am bound for a +certain term on each night to dance all the +quadrilles, and a few of the polkas and +waltzes with clumsy partners; and then I +have to eat stale pastry and tough poultry +<span class='pageno' id='Page_90'>90</span>before I am let off from <i>that</i> place. After, I +am bound to go to some cellar or singing +place to listen to ‘Hail, smiling morn,’ +‘Mynheer Van Dunk,’ ‘The monks of old,’ +‘Happy land,’ imitations of the London +actors, and to hear a whole canto of dreary +extempore verses. I must also smoke a dozen +of cigars, knowing—as in my present condition +I must know,—what they are made of. +The whole to end on each night with unlimited +brandy (British) and water, and eternal intoxication. +Oh, F. F., be warned! be warned! +Take my advice; keep up your resolution, +and don’t do it again. When afloat, drink +nothing stronger than purser’s tea. When +on shore be temperate in your pleasures; +don’t turn night into day; don’t exchange +wholesome amusements for rabid debauchery, +robust health for disease and—well, I won’t +mention it. When afloat, study your profession +and don’t get cashiered and cold-shouldered +as I was. Promise me—nay, you +must swear!”</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘At this word I thought I heard a gurgling +sound in the water.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘“If I can get six solemn pledges before the +season’s over, I’m only to go these horrid +rounds during the meeting of Parliament.”</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘“<i>Will</i> you swear?” again urged the voice, +with persuasive agony.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘I was just able to comply.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘“Ten thousand thanks!” were the next +words I heard; “I’m off, for there is an awful +pint of pale ale, a chop, and a glass of brandy +and water overdue yet, and I must devour +them at the Shades.” (We were then close +to London Bridge.) “Don’t let the waterman +pull to shore; I can get there without +troubling him.”</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘I remember no more. When sensation returned, +I was in bed, in this very house, a +shade worse than I had been from the previous +attack.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘That,’ said Philip, who had left his tumbler +untasted, ‘must have been when you had +your head shaved for the second time.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Exactly so.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘And you really believe it was Jovial +James’s ghost,’ inquired Fid, earnestly.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Would it be rational to doubt it?’</p> + +<p class='c006'>Philip rose and paced the room in deep +thought for several minutes. He cast two or +three earnest looks at his brother, and a few +longing ones at his glass. In the course of +his cogitation, he groaned out more than once +an apostrophe to poor ‘James Barber.’ At +length he declared his mind was made up.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Ferd!’ he said, ‘I told you awhile ago to +throw your lemonade over the side of the +Ship. Don’t. Souse out my grog instead.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>The lieutenant did as he was bid.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘And now,’ said Fid the elder, ‘ring for +soda water; for one must drink <i>something</i>.’</p> + +<hr class='c010'> + +<p class='c006'>Last year it was my own good fortune to +sail with Mr. Philip Fid in the ‘Bombottle’ +(74). He is not exactly a tee-totaller: but +he never drinks spirits, and will not touch +wine unmixed with water, for fear of its interfering +with his studies, at which he is, with +the assistance of the naval instructor (who is +also our chaplain), assiduous. He is our first +mate, and the smartest officer in the ship. +Seton is our surgeon.</p> + +<p class='c006'>One day, after a cheerful ward-room +dinner (of which Fid was a guest), while we +were at anchor in the bay of Cadiz, the conversation +happened to turn upon Jovial +Jemmy’s apparition, which had become the +best authenticated ghost story in Her Majesty’s +Naval service. On that occasion Seton +undertook to explain the mystery upon +medical principles.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘The fact is,’ he said, ‘what the commander +of the “Arrow” saw (Ferdinand had by this +time got commissioned in his old ship) was a +spectrum, produced by that morbid condition +of the brain, which is brought on by the immoderate +use of stimulants, and by dissipation; +we call it Transient Monomania. I could +show you dozens of such ghosts in the books, +if you only had patience while I turned them +up.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>Everybody declared that was unnecessary. +We would take the doctor’s word for it; +though I feel convinced not a soul besides the +chaplain and myself had one iota of his faith +shaken in the real presence of Jovial Jemmy’s +<i>post-mortem</i> appearance to Fid the younger.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Ghost or no ghost, however, the story had +had the effect of converting Philip Fid from +one of the most intemperate and inattentive to +one of the soberest and best of Her Majesty’s +officers. May his promotion be speedy!</p> + +<div class='lg-container-r'> + <div class='linegroup'> + <div class='group'> + <div class='line'><span class='sc'>P. Clay, Lieut. R.M.</span></div> + </div> + </div> +</div> + +<div class='lg-container-l'> + <div class='linegroup'> + <div class='group'> + <div class='line'>H.M.S. ‘<span class='sc'>Bombottle</span>.’</div> + <div class='line'><i>20th March, 1850.</i></div> + </div> + </div> +</div> + +<div class='chapter'> + <h2 class='c004'>THE TRUE STORY OF A COAL FIRE.</h2> +</div> + +<p class='c005'>IN THREE CHAPTERS.—CHAPTER THE LAST.</p> + +<p class='c006'>The air blew freshly over the bright waving +grass of a broad sloping field, on which the +morning dews were sparkling and glancing +in the sun. The clouds moved quickly over +head, in clear grey and golden tints on their +upper edges and foamy crests, with dark +billows beneath, and their shadows chased +each other down the green slopes of the field +in rapid succession. Swiftly following them—now +in the midst of them—now seeming to +lead them on, a fine bay horse with flying +mane, wild outspreading tail, and dilated +nostrils, dashed onward exulting in his liberty, +his strength, his speed, and all the early associations +and influences of nature around him! +He was a coal-mine horse, and had been just +brought up the shaft for a holiday.</p> + +<p class='c006'>All this Flashley saw very distinctly, having +been hastily landed at the top of the shaft, lifted +into a tram-cart, and trundled off, he knew +not by what enginery, till he was suddenly +shot out on the top of a green embankment, +and rolling down to the bottom, found himself +<span class='pageno' id='Page_91'>91</span>lying in a fresh green field. He enjoyed the +action, the spirit, and every motion of the +horse. It was the exact embodiment in activity +of his strongest present feelings and +impulses. He jumped up to run after the +horse, and mount him if he could, or if not, +scamper about the field with him in the same +fashion. But while he sought to advance, he +felt as if he were retreating—in fact, he was +sure of it;—the grass ran by him, instead of +his running over it—the hedges ran through +him, instead of his passing along them—the +trees sped away before him into the distance, +as he was carried backwards. He lost his +legs—he sank upon the air—he was still +carried backwards—all the landscape faded, +and with a loud splash he fell into the +sea!</p> + +<p class='c006'>Down he sank, and fancied he saw green +watery fields rolling on all sides, and over +him; and presently he heard a voice hoarsely +calling as if from some bank above. He certainly +had heard the voice before, and recognised +it with considerable awe, though the +words it uttered were homely and unromantic +enough. It shouted out ‘Nancy, of Sunderland!—boat +ahoy!’</p> + +<p class='c006'>By some inexplicable process—though he +clearly distinguished a boat-hook in the performance—Flashley +was picked up from beneath +the waves, and lifted into a boat. It +was a little, dirty, black, thick-gunnelled jollyboat, +rowed by two men in short black over-shirts +and smutty canvas trowsers. In the +stern sat the captain with his arms folded. +A broad-brimmed tarpaulin hat shaded his +face. They pulled alongside a ship as black +as death, but very lively; and a rope being +lowered from the side, it was passed under +Flashley’s arms in a noose, and the next moment +he was hoisted on deck, and told to +attend to his duty.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘My duty!’ ejaculated Flashley, ‘Attend +to my duty! Oh, what <i>is</i> my duty?’ His +eyes wandered round. Nothing but hard +black planks and timbers, and masts with +reefed sails, and rigging all covered with coal-dust, +met his gaze. The sky, however, was +visible above him—<i>that</i> was a great comfort.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Scrape these carrots and parsnips,’ said +the Captain solemnly, ‘very clean, d’ye mind!—and +take them to the cook in the galley, +who’ll let you know what’s next. When he +has done with you, clean my sea-boots, and +grease them with candle-ends; dry my peajacket, +pilot-coat, and dreadnoughts; clean +my pipe, and fill it—light, and take three +whiffs to start it; mix me a glass of grog, and +bring it with the lighted pipe; then, go and +lend a hand in tarring the weather-rigging, +and stand by, to go aloft and ease down the +fore-top-gallant mast when the mate wants +her on deck.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Oh, heavens!’ thought Flashley, ‘are +these then my duties! This hideous black +ship must be a collier—and I am the cabinboy!’</p> + +<p class='c006'>A mixed impulse of equal curiosity and +apprehension (it certainly was from no anxiety +to commence his miscellaneous duties) caused +him to ‘inquire his way’ to the cook’s galley. +He was presently taken to a square enclosure, +not unlike a great black rabbit-hutch, open at +both sides, in which he was received by a man +of large proportions, who was seated on an +inverted iron saucepan, smoking. The black +visage gave a grim smile and familiar wink. +It could not be the miner who had acted as +his guide and companion underground! And +yet—</p> + +<p class='c006'>Flashley stepped back hastily, and cast an +anxious look towards the after-part of the +deck. There stood the Captain. A short yet +very heavily-built figure,—a kind of stunted +giant. He was not an Indian, nor a Mulatto, +nor an African,—and yet his face was as black +as a coal, in which several large veins rose +prominently, and had a dull yellow tinge, as +if they had been run with gold, or some +metallic substance of that colour. Who could +he be? Some demon <i>incog.</i>? No, not that—but +some one whom Flashley held in equal +awe.</p> + +<p class='c006'>How long poor Flashley continued to perform +his multifarious duties on board the +‘Nancy’ he had no idea, but they appeared at +times very onerous, and he had to undergo +many hardships. This was especially the case +in the North Sea during the winter months, +which are often of the severest kind on the +coast between Sunderland and the mouth of +the Thames. The rigging was all frozen, so +that to lay hold of a rope seemed to take the +skin off his hand; the cold went to the bone, +and he hardly knew if his hands were struck +through with frost, or by a hot iron. The +decks were all slippery with ice, so were the +ladders down to the cabins, and the cook’s +galley was garnished all round with large +icicles, from six inches to a foot and a half in +length, which kept up a continual drip, drip, +on all sides, by way of complimentary acknowledgment +of the caboose-fire inside. Sometimes +the wind burst the side-doors open—blew the +fire clean out of the caboose, and scattered the +live and dead coals all over the deck, or whirled +them into the sea. One night the galley +itself, with all its black and smutty paraphernalia, +was torn up and blown overboard. It +danced about on the tops of the waves—made +deep curtseys—swept up the side of a long +billow—was struck by a cross-wave, and disappeared +in a hundred black planks and +splinters. That same night Flashley was +called up from his berth to go aloft and lend +a hand to close-reef the main-topsail. The +sail was all frozen, and so stiff that he could +not raise it; but as he hauled on one of the +points, the point broke, and something happened +to him,—he did not know what, but he +thought he fell backwards, and the wind flew +away with him.</p> + +<p class='c006'>The next thing he remembered was that of +lying in his berth with a bandage round one +<span class='pageno' id='Page_92'>92</span>arm, and a large patch on one side of his head, +while the cook sat on a sea-chest by his side +reading to him.</p> + +<p class='c006'>A deep splashing plunge was now heard, +followed by the rapid rumbling of an iron +chain along the deck overhead. The collier +had arrived off Rotherhithe, and cast anchor.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Up, Flashley!’ cried the cook; ‘on deck, +my lad! to receive the whippers who are +coming alongside.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘What for?’ exclaimed Flashley; ‘why +am I to be whipped?’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘It is not you,’ said the cook, laughing +gruffly, as he ran up the ladder, ‘but the +coal-baskets that are to be whipped up, and +discharged into the lighter.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>The deck being cleared, and the main +hatchway opened, a small iron wheel (called +<i>gin</i>) was rigged out on a rope passing over +the top of a spar (called <i>derrick</i>) at some 18 +or 20 feet above the deck. Over this wheel +a rope was passed, to which four other ropes +were attached lower down. These were for +the four whippers. At the other end of the +wheel-rope was slung a basket. A second +basket stood upon the coals, where four men +also stood with shovels—two to fill each +basket, one being always up and one down. +The whippers had a stage raised above the +deck, made of five rails, which they ascended +for the pull, higher and higher as the coals +got lower in the hold. The two baskets-full +were the complement for one measure. The +‘measure’ was a black angular wooden box +with its front placed close to the vessel’s side, +just above a broad trough that slanted towards +the lighter. Beside the measure stood +the ‘meter,’ (an elderly personage with his +head and jaws bound up in a bundle-handkerchief, +to protect him from the draughts,) +who had a piece of chalk in one hand, while +with the other he was ready to raise a latch, +and let all the coals burst out of the measure +into the trough, by the fall of the front part of +the box. The measure was suspended to one +end of a balance, a weight being attached to +the other, so that the weighing and measuring +were performed by one process under the +experienced, though rheumatic, eye of the +meter.</p> + +<p class='c006'>The whippers continued at their laborious +work all day; and as the coals were taken +out of the hold, (the basket descending lower +and lower as the depth increased,) the ‘whippers’ +who hauled up, gave their weight to +the pull, and all swung down from their +ricketty rails with a leap upon the deck, as +the basket ran up; ascending again to their +position while the basket was being emptied +into the trough.</p> + +<p class='c006'>The lighter had five compartments, called +‘rooms,’ each holding seven tons of coals; +and when these were filled, the men sometimes +heaped coals all over them from one +end of the craft to the other, as high up as +the combings, or side-ridges, would afford +protection for the heap. By these means a +lighter could carry forty-two tons, and upwards; +and some of the craft having no +separate ‘rooms,’ but an open hold, fore and aft, +could carry between fifty and fifty-five tons.</p> + +<p class='c006'>A canal barge or monkey-boat (so called +we presume from being very narrow in +the loins) now came alongside, and having +taken in her load of coals, the friendly +cook of the ‘Nancy’ expressed an anxiety +that Flashley should lose no opportunity of +gaining all possible experience on the subject +of coals, and the coal-trade generally, and +therefore proposed to him a canal trip, having +already spoken with the ‘captain of the +barge’ on the subject. Before Flashley +had time to object, or utter a demur, he +was handed over the side, and pitched neatly +on his legs on the after-part of the barge, close +to a little crooked iron chimney, sticking +blackly out of the deck, and sending forth a +dense cloud of the dirtiest and most unsavoury +smoke. The captain was standing +on the ladder of the cabin, leaning on his +great arms and elbows over the deck, and +completely filling up the small square hatchway, +so that all things being black alike, it +seemed as if this brawny object were some +live excrescence of the barge, or huge black +mandrake whose roots were spread about +beneath, and, perhaps, here and there, sending +a speculative straggler through a chink into +the water.</p> + +<p class='c006'>The mandrake’s eyes smiled, and he showed +a very irregular set of large white and yellow +teeth, as he scrunched down through the +small square hole to enable the young passenger +and tourist to descend.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Flashley, with a forlorn look up at the sky, +and taking a good breath of fresh air to fortify +him for what his nose already warned him he +would have to encounter, managed to get +down the four upright bars nailed close to the +bulk-head, and called the ‘ladder.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>He found himself in a small aperture of no +definite shape, and in which there was only +room for one person to ‘turn’ at a time. Yet +five living creatures were already there, and +apparently enjoying themselves. There was +the captain, and there was his wife, and there +was a child in the wife’s right arm, and +another of five years old packed against her +left side, and there was the ‘crew’ of the +barge, which consisted, for the present, of one +boy of sixteen, of very stunted growth, and +with one eye turning inwards to such a degree +that sometimes the sight literally darted out, +seeming to shoot beneath the bridge of his +nose. They were all sitting, or rather +hunched up, at ‘tea.’ The place had an overwhelming +odour of coal-smoke, and tobacco +smoke, and brown sugar, and onions, to say +nothing of general ‘closeness,’ and the steam +of a wet blanket-coat, which was lying in a +heap to dry before the little iron stove. The +door of this was open, and the fire shone +brightly, and seemed to ‘<i>wink</i>’ at Flashley as +he looked that way.</p> + +<p class='c006'><span class='pageno' id='Page_93'>93</span>‘Here we are!’ said a strange voice.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Flashley looked earnestly into the stove. +He thought the voice came from the fire. +The coals certainly looked very glowing, and +shot out what a German or other imaginative +author would call <i>significant</i> sparks.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Here we are!’ said the voice from another +part of the cabin, and, turning in that direction, +Flashley found that it proceeded from +the ‘crew,’ who had contrived to stand up, +and was endeavouring to give a close +imitation of the ‘clown,’ on his first appearance +after transformation. This, by +the help of his odd eye, was very significant +indeed.</p> + +<p class='c006'>And here they were, no doubt, and here +they lived from day to day, and from night to +night; and a pretty wretched, dirty, monotonous +life it was. Having once got into a +canal, with the horse at his long tug, the +tediousness of the time was not easily to be +surpassed. From canal to river, and from +river to canal, there was scarcely any variety, +except in the passage through the locks, the +management of the rope in passing another +barge-horse on the tow-path, and the means +to be employed in taking the horse over a +bridge. The duty of driving the horse along +the tow-path, as may be conjectured, fell to +the lot of our young tourist. Once or +twice, ‘concealed by the murky shades of +night,’ as a certain novelist would express it, +he had ventured to mount the horse’s back; +but the animal, not relishing this addition to +his work, always took care, when they passed +under a bridge, or near a wall, or hard embankment, +to scrape his rider’s leg along the +side, so that very little good was got in that +way. And once, when Flashley had a ‘holiday,’ +and was allowed to walk up and down +the full length of the barge upon the top of +the coals, a sudden bend in the river brought +them close upon a very low wooden bridge, +just when he was at the wrong end of the +barge for making a dive to save his head. +Flashley ran along the top as fast as he could, +but the rascally horse seemed to quicken his +pace, under the captain’s mischievous lash, so +that finding the shadow of the bridge running +at him before he could make his leap from the +top of the coals, he was obliged to save himself +from being violently knocked off, by +jumping hastily into the canal, to the infinite +amusement and delight of the captain, his +wife, and the ‘crew.’ The horse being +stopped, the captain came back and lugged +him out of the bulrushes just as he had got +thoroughly entangled, and immersed to the +chin; knee-deep in mud, and with frogs and +eels skeeling and striking out in all directions +around him.</p> + +<p class='c006'>After a week or ten days passed in this +delightful manner, Flashley found the barge +was again on the Thames, no longer towed by +a horse and rope, but by a little dirty steam-tug. +They stopped on meeting a lighter on +its way up with the tide, and Flashley being +told to step on board, was received by his +grim but good-natured companion and instructor, +the cook of the ‘Nancy,’ now going +up with a load to Bankside, and performing +the feat of managing two black oars of enormous +length and magnitude. They were +worked in large grooves in each side of the +lighter, one oar first receiving all the strength +of this stupendous lighterman (late cook) with +his feet firmly planted on a cross-beam in +front, so as to add to the mighty pull of his +arms, all the strength of his legs, as well as +all the weight of his body. Having made +this broad sweep and deep, he left the oar +lying along the groove, and went to the one +on the other side, with which he performed a +similar sweep.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Here’s a brig with all sails set, close upon +us!’ cried Flashley.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘She’d best take care of herself;’ said our +lighterman, as he went on deliberately to +complete his long pull and strong.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Bump came the brig’s starboard bow +against the lighter; and instantly heeling +over with a lift and a lurch, the former reeled +away to leeward, a row of alarmed but more +enraged faces instantly appearing over the +bulwarks—those ‘aft’ with eyes flashing on +the lighterman, and those ‘for’ard,’ anxiously +looking over to see if the bows had been +stove in. A volley of anathemas followed our +lighterman; who, however, continued slowly +to rise and sink backward with his prodigious +pull, apparently not hearing a word, or even +aware of what had happened.</p> + +<p class='c006'>In this way they went up the river among +sailing-vessels of all kinds, and between the +merchants’ ‘forest of masts,’ like some huge +antediluvian water-reptile deliberately winding +its way up a broad river between the +woods of a region unknown to man.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘But here’s a steamer!’ shouted Flashley.—‘We +shall be run down, or she’ll go slap +over us!’</p> + +<p class='c006'>The man at the wheel, however, knew +better. He had dealt with lightermen before +to-day. He therefore turned off the sharp +nose of the steamer, so as not merely to clear +it, but dexterously to send the ‘swell’ in a +long rolling swath up against the lighter, +over which it completely ran, leaving the performer +at the oars drenched up to the hips, +and carrying Flashley clean overboard. He +was swept away in the rolling wave, and +might have been drowned, had not a coalheaver +at one of the wharfs put off a skiff to +his rescue.</p> + +<p class='c006'>So now behold Flashley at work among +the wharfingers of Bankside.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Before the coals are put into the sack, they +undergo a process called ‘screening.’ This +consists in throwing them up against a slanting +sieve of iron wire, through which the +fine coal and coal-dust runs: all that falls on +the outer side of the screen is then sacked. +But many having found that the coals are +often broken still more by this process, to +<span class='pageno' id='Page_94'>94</span>their loss, (as few people will buy the small +coal and dust, except at breweries and waterworks), +they have adopted the plan of a +round sieve held in the hand, and filled by a +shovel. The delightful and lucrative appointment +of holding the sieve was, of course, conferred +upon Flashley. His shoulders and +arms ached as though they would drop off +long before his day’s work was done; but +what he gained in especial, was the fine coal-dust +which the wind carried into his face—often +at one gust, filling his eyes, mouth, +nostrils, and the windward ear.</p> + +<p class='c006'>In the condition to which this post soon +brought his ‘personal appearance,’ Flashley +was one morning called up at five to go with +a waggon-load of coals a few miles into the +country, in company with two coalheavers and +a carman. Up he got. And off they went.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Flashley, having worked hard all the previous +day, was in no sprightly condition on +his early rising; so, by the time the waggon +had got beyond the outskirts of London, and +begun to labour slowly up hill with its heavy +load, he was fain to ask in a humble voice of +the head coalheaver, permission to lay hold +of a rope which dangled behind, in order to +help himself onwards. This being granted +with a smile, the good-nature of which (and +how seldom do we meet with a coalheaver +who is not a good-natured fellow) shone even +through his dust-begrimed visage, Flashley +continued to follow the waggon till he had +several times nearly gone to sleep; and was +only reminded of the fact by a stumble which +brought him with his nose very near the +ground. The head coalheaver, observing this, +took compassion on him; and being a gigantic +man, laid hold of Flashley’s trowsers, and +with one lift of his arm deposited the young +man upon the top of the second tier of coal-sacks. +There he at once resigned himself to +a delicious repose.</p> + +<p class='c006'>The waggon meanwhile pursued its heavy +journey, with an occasional pause for a slight +moistening of the mouth of men and horses. +At length the removal of one or two of the +upper tier of sacks caused Flashley to raise +his drowsy head, and look round him.</p> + +<p class='c006'>The waggon had pulled up close to a garden-gate, +on the other side of which were a crowd +of apple-trees. The ripe fruit loaded the +branches till they hung in a vista, beneath +which the sacks of coals had to be carried. +All the horses had their nose-bags on, and +were very busy. It was a bright autumn day; +the sun was fast setting; a rich beam of +crimson and gold cast its splendours over the +garden, and lighted up the ripe apples to a +most romantic degree.</p> + +<p class='c006'>The garden gates were thrown open; the +passage of coal-sacks beneath the hanging +boughs commenced.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Not an apple was knocked down, even by +the tall figure of the leading coalheaver. +Stooping and dodging, and gently humouring +a special difficulty, he performed his walk of +thirty yards, and more, till he turned the +shrubbery corner, and thence made his way +into the coal-cellar. His companion followed +him, in turn, imitating his great example; +and, if we make exception of three lemon-pippins +and a codlin, with equal success. But +where these accidental apples fell, there they +remained; none were promoted to mouth or +pocket.</p> + +<p class='c006'>It was now half-past four, and ‘the milk’ +arriving at the gate, was deposited in its little +tin can on a strawberry bed just beyond the +gate-post. The head coalheaver’s turn with +his load being next, he observed the milk as +he approached, and bending his long legs, by +judicious gradations, till he reached the little +can with the fingers of his left hand, balancing +the sack of coals at the same time, so that not +a fragment tumbled out of the open mouth, +he slowly rose again to his right position, +holding out the can at arm’s length to prevent +any coal-dust finding its way to the delicate +surface within. In this fashion, with tenfold +care bestowed on the ounce and a half in his +left hand, to that which he gave to the two +hundred weight of coals on his back (not +reckoning the sack, which, being an old and +patched one, weighed fifteen pounds more) +the coalheaver made his way, stooping and +sideling beneath the apple-boughs as before, +all of which he passed without knocking a +single apple down, and deposited the little +can in the hands of an admiring maidservant, +as he passed the kitchen window on +his way to the coal-cellar.</p> + +<p class='c006'>After the sacks had all been shot in the +cellar, and the hats of each man filled with +apples by the applauding master of the house, +the counting of the empty sacks commenced. +Having been thrice exhorted to be present at +this ceremony by a wise neighbour, who stood +looking on anxiously, from the next garden, +with his nostrils resting on the top of the +wall, the owner of the apple garden went +forth to the gate, and with a grave countenance +beheld the sacks counted. Orders +for beer being then given on the nearest +country alehouse, the coalheavers carefully +gathered up all the odd coals which had fallen +here and there, then swept the paths, and +with hot and smiling visages took their departure, +slowly lounging after the waggon +and stretching their brawny arms and backs +after their herculean work.</p> + +<p class='c006'>As the men thus proceeded down the winding +lane, crunching apples, and thinking of beer +to follow, the carman was the first to speak.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘How <i>cute</i> the chap was arter <i>they</i> sacks!’ +said he with a grin, and half turning round to +look back.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘There’s a gennelman,’ said the head coalheaver, +‘as don’t ought to be wronged out of +the vally of <i>that</i>!’ the amount in question +being a pinch of coal-dust which the speaker +took up from one side of the waggon, and +sprinkled in the air.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘He allus gives a ticket for beer,’ said the +<span class='pageno' id='Page_95'>95</span>second coalheaver, ‘but last time the apples +warn’t ripe.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘He counted the <i>sacks</i> nation sharp, howsever,’ +pursued the carman with a very +knowing look.</p> + +<p class='c006'>At this both the coalheavers laughed +loudly.</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Ah!’ said the second coalheaver; ‘people +think that makes all sure. They don’t think +of the ease of bringing an empty sack with +us, after dropping a full one by the way. +Not they. Nobody yet was ever wise +enough to count the full sacks when they +first come.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>On hearing this, the carman’s face presented +a confounded and perplexed look of irritated +stupidity, marked in such very hard lines, +that the coalheavers laughed for the next +five minutes with the recollection of it.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Towards dusk the waggon returned to the +wharf, and next day Flashley resumed his +usual duties.</p> + +<p class='c006'>One morning, after several hours’ work with +the sieve in ‘screening,’ when his face and +hands were, if possible, more hopelessly black +than they had ever been before, Flashley was +called to take a note to a merchant at the +Coal Exchange. This merchant’s name seemed +rather an unusual one to meet with in England—being +no less a person than Haji Ali Camaralzaman +and Co.</p> + +<p class='c006'>The merchant was a short, solid-built +figure, and stood with a heavy immobility +that gave the effect of a metallic image rather +than a man. He was a Moor, though nearly +black, and with very sparkling eyes. He was +dressed in a long dark blouse, open at the +breast, and displaying a black satin waistcoat, +embroidered with golden sprigs and tendrils. +It seemed to Flashley that he spoke a foreign +language; and yet he understood him, though +without having any idea what language it +was. Something passed between them in a +very earnest tone, almost a whisper, about +Sinbad the Sailor, and a sort of confused discussion +as to the geographical position of the +Valley of Black Diamonds; also, if coals were +ever burnt in the east; then a confused voice +from within the hall called out loudly, ‘The +North Star!’ to which a chorus of coal-merchants +responded in a low chant, ‘What +money does he owe the divan?’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Yes,’ said the great Camaralzaman, ‘and +what lost time does he owe to nature and to +knowledge? Let the North Star look to it.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘It does, great Sir!’ responded the chorus +of coal-merchants, in the same low chant. +‘It shines directly over the shaft of the +William Pitt mine.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘Enough,’ said Camaralzaman.</p> + +<p class='c006'>At this all the merchants fell softly into a +heap of white ashes.</p> + +<p class='c006'>Then the Moor, turning to Flashley, said, +‘You must reflect a little on all these things. +Coals are more valuable to the world than the +riches of other mines—more important than +gold and silver, and diamonds of the first +water, because they are the means of advancing +and extending the comforts and refinements +of life—the industrial arts, the +trades, the ornamental arts. Are not these +great things? Behold, there are greater yet +which are indebted to the coal-fires. For, +may I not name Science, Agriculture (in the +making of iron, and the steam-ploughs which +are forthcoming), Commerce and Navigation. +Moreover, do they not tend, by the generation +of steam, to annihilate space and time, and are +they not rapidly carrying knowledge and civilisation +to the remotest corners of the habitable +globe? By myriads of jets, in countless forms, +they turn the dark night into the brightness +of day. Their history commences from the +infancy of the earth; they proceed through +gradations of wonders; are no less wonderful +in the varieties and magnitude of their utility, +and do not cease to be of use to man, even +when the bright fire is utterly extinguished, +and its materials can no more be re-illumined, +but are claimed for the garden and the brickfield, +not by the dinging and tolling of the +bell-man of your grandsires, but by the long-drawn +wail of the queer-kneed dusky figure in +the flap-hat, who wanders down your streets +yowling ‘’Sto—e! o—e!’</p> + +<p class='c006'>‘And is it then all over? Verily, it doth +appear when the coal fire is fairly burnt +out to cinders and ashes, that it hath performed +its complete circle, and is for ever +ended. It is <i>not</i> so. The antediluvian forests +absorbed the gases of the atmosphere; much +of these have been drawn off; and appropriated, +but some portions have remained +locked up and hidden in the depths of the +earth ever since. Lo! the coal fire is lighted!—flames, +for the first time, ascend from it. +Then, also for the first time, are liberated +gases which are of the date of those primæval +forests; they ascend into the atmosphere, and +once more form a portion of those elements +which are again to assist in the growth of +forests. The Coal-Spirit has then performed +his grand cycle—and recommences his journey +through future cycles of formation.’</p> + +<p class='c006'>A great blaze of light now smote across +the hall, in which everything vanished. Then +passed a rushing panorama through Flashley’s +brain, wherein he saw whirling by, the stage +of a saloon theatre, with a lighted cigar and +two tankards dancing a ridiculous reel, till +the whole scene changed to a melancholy +swamp, out of which arose, to solemn music, +an antediluvian forest. The Elfin of the +Coal-mine came and stood in the midst, and +some one held an iron umbrella over Flashley’s +head, which instantly caused him to sink +deep through the earth, and he soon found +himself crawling in a dark trench terminating +in a chasm looking out upon the sea. +He was immediately whisked across by a black +eagle, and dropped in a bright-green field, +where he met a tall dusky figure carrying a +sack of coals and a ‘ha’p’orth’ of milk; but just +as he was about to speak to him, a voice called +<span class='pageno' id='Page_96'>96</span>out ‘Nancy!’ and all was darkness, while +through the horrid gloom he saw the glaring +eye-ball of a horse. ‘Camaralzaman!’ cried +the voice again: ‘Have you been sleeping +here all night in the arm chair?’ Then a vivid +flame shot over Flashley’s eyelids—there was +a great fire blazing before him, in the midst +of which he saw the head of the Elfin, +who gave him a nod full of meaning, and +also like bidding farewell, and disappeared +in the fire,—while at his side stood Margery +with the carpet-broom.</p> + +<p class='c006'>It was six in the morning, and she had just +lighted the parlour fire. Without replying to +any of her interrogations of surprise, Flashley +slowly rose, and went out to take a few turns +round the garden; where he fell into a train +of thought which, in all probability, will have +a salutary influence on his future life.</p> + +<div class='chapter'> + <h2 class='c004'>SUPPOSING!</h2> +</div> + +<p class='c005'>Supposing, we were to change the Property +and Income Tax a little, and make it somewhat +heavier on realised property, and somewhat +lighter on mere income, fixed and uncertain, +I wonder whether we should be committing +any violent injustice!</p> + +<p class='c006'>Supposing, we were to be more Christian +and less mystical, agreeing more about the +spirit and fighting less about the letter, I +wonder whether we should present a very +irreligious and indecent spectacle to the mass +of mankind!</p> + +<p class='c006'>Supposing, the Honorable Member for +White troubled his head a little less about +the Honorable Member for Black, and <i>vice +versâ</i>, and that both applied themselves a little +more in earnest to the real business of the +honorable people and the honorable country, I +wonder whether it would be unparliamentary!</p> + +<p class='c006'>Supposing, that, when there was a surplus +in the Public Treasury, we laid aside our own +particular whims, and all agreed that there +were four elements necessary to the existence +of our fellow creatures, to wit, earth, air, fire, +and water, and that these were the first grand +necessaries to be uncooped and untaxed, I +wonder whether it would be unreasonable!</p> + +<p class='c006'>Supposing, we had at this day a Baron +Jenner, or a Viscount Watt, or an Earl +Stephenson, or a Marquess of Brunel, or a +dormant Shakespeare peerage, or a Hogarth +baronetcy, I wonder whether it would be +cruelly disgraceful to our old nobility!</p> + +<p class='c006'>Supposing, we were all of us to come off +our pedestals and mix a little more with +those below us, with no fear but that genius, +rank, and wealth, would always sufficiently +assert their own superiority, I wonder +whether we should lower ourselves beyond +retrieval!</p> + +<p class='c006'>Supposing, we were to have less botheration +and more real education, I wonder whether +we should have less or more compulsory +colonisation, and Cape of Good Hope very +natural indignation!</p> + +<p class='c006'>Supposing, we were materially to simplify +the laws, and to abrogate the absurd fiction +that everybody is supposed to be acquainted +with them, when we know very well that +such acquaintance is the study of a life in +which some fifty men may have been proficient +perhaps in five times fifty years, I +wonder whether laws would be respected +less?</p> + +<p class='c006'>Supposing, we maintained too many of such +fictions altogether, and found their stabling +come exceedingly expensive!</p> + +<p class='c006'>Supposing, we looked about us, and seeing +a cattle-market originally established in an +open place, standing in the midst of a great +city because of the unforeseen growth of that +great city all about it, and, hearing it asserted +that the market was still adapted to the requirements +and conveniences of the great city, +made up our minds to say that this was stark-mad +nonsense and we wouldn’t bear it, I +wonder whether we should be revolutionary!</p> + +<p class='c006'>Supposing, we were to harbour a small +suspicion that there was too much doing in +the diplomatic line of business, and that the +world would get on better with that shop +shut up three days a week, I wonder whether +it would be a huge impiety!</p> + +<p class='c006'>Supposing, Governments were to consider +public questions less with reference to their +own time, and more with reference to all +time, I wonder how we should get on then!</p> + +<p class='c006'>Supposing, the wisdom of our ancestors +should turn out to be a mere phrase, and that +if there were any sense in it, it should +follow that we ought to be believers in the +worship of the Druids at this hour, I wonder +whether any people would have talked mere +moonshine all their lives!</p> + +<p class='c006'>Supposing, we were clearly to perceive that +we cannot keep some men out of their share +in the administration of affairs, and were to +say to them, ‘Come, brothers, let us take +counsel together, and see how we can best +manage this; and don’t expect too much +from what you get; and let us all in our +degree put our shoulders to the wheel, and +strive; and let us all improve ourselves and +all abandon something of our extreme opinions +for the general harmony,’ I wonder whether +we should want so many special constables +on any future tenth of April, or should +talk so much about it any more!</p> + +<p class='c006'>I wonder whether people who are quite +easy about anything, usually <i>do</i> talk quite so +much about it!</p> + +<p class='c006'>Mr. Lane, the traveller, tells us of a superstition +the Egyptians have, that the mischievous +Genii are driven away by iron, of which they +have an instinctive dread. Supposing, this +should foreshadow the disappearance of the +evil spirits and ignorances besetting this earth, +before the iron steam-engines and roads, I +wonder whether we could expedite their flight +at all by iron energy!</p> + +<p class='c006'>Supposing, we were just to try two or three +of these experiments!</p> + +<div class='nf-center-c0'> +<div class='nf-center c001'> + <div><span class='small'>Published at the Office, No. 16, Wellington Street North, Strand. Printed by <span class='sc'>Bradbury & Evans</span>, Whitefriars, London.</span></div> + </div> +</div> + +<div class='pbb'> + <hr class='pb c003'> +</div> +<div class='tnotes x-ebookmaker'> + +<div class='chapter ph2'> + +<div class='nf-center-c0'> +<div class='nf-center c011'> + <div>TRANSCRIBER’S NOTES</div> + </div> +</div> + +</div> + + <ul class='ul_1 c001'> + <li>Fixed typos; non-standard spelling and dialect retained. + + </li> + <li>Renumbered footnotes. + </li> + </ul> + +</div> + +<div style='text-align:center'>*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 78167 ***</div> + </body> + <!-- created with ppgen.py 3.57i (with regex) on 2026-03-10 23:46:01 GMT --> +</html> diff --git a/78167-h/images/cover.jpg b/78167-h/images/cover.jpg Binary files differnew file mode 100644 index 0000000..669bf43 --- /dev/null +++ b/78167-h/images/cover.jpg |
