diff options
| author | Roger Frank <rfrank@pglaf.org> | 2025-10-15 05:15:47 -0700 |
|---|---|---|
| committer | Roger Frank <rfrank@pglaf.org> | 2025-10-15 05:15:47 -0700 |
| commit | a4174c384c5588cc8d5646d801031f1c091b6b29 (patch) | |
| tree | f50ee6c37006aabf147ec5ec8173c272c6907eea | |
| -rw-r--r-- | .gitattributes | 3 | ||||
| -rw-r--r-- | 776.txt | 6085 | ||||
| -rw-r--r-- | 776.zip | bin | 0 -> 74874 bytes | |||
| -rw-r--r-- | LICENSE.txt | 11 | ||||
| -rw-r--r-- | README.md | 2 |
5 files changed, 6101 insertions, 0 deletions
diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6833f05 --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,3 @@ +* text=auto +*.txt text +*.md text @@ -0,0 +1,6085 @@ +Project Gutenberg's Hermione's Little Group of Serious Thinkers +#4 in our series by Don Marquis + + +Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check +the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! + +Please take a look at the important information in this header. +We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an +electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. + + +**Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** + +**Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** + +*These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* + +Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and +further information is included below. We need your donations. + + +Hermione and Her Little Group of Serious Thinkers + +by Don Marquis + +January, 1997 [Etext #776] + + +Project Gutenberg's Hermione's Little Group of Serious Thinkers +*****This file should be named 776.txt or 776.zip****** + + +We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance +of the official release dates, for time for better editing. + +Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till +midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. +The official release date of all Project Gutenberg Etexts is at +Midnight, Central Time, of the last day of the stated month. A +preliminary version may often be posted for suggestion, comment +and editing by those who wish to do so. To be sure you have an +up to date first edition [xxxxx10x.xxx] please check file sizes +in the first week of the next month. Since our ftp program has +a bug in it that scrambles the date [tried to fix and failed] a +look at the file size will have to do, but we will try to see a +new copy has at least one byte more or less. + + +Information about Project Gutenberg (one page) + +We produce about two million dollars for each hour we work. The +fifty hours is one conservative estimate for how long it we take +to get any etext selected, entered, proofread, edited, copyright +searched and analyzed, the copyright letters written, etc. This +projected audience is one hundred million readers. If our value +per text is nominally estimated at one dollar then we produce $2 +million dollars per hour this year as we release thirty-two text +files per month: or 400 more Etexts in 1996 for a total of 800. +If these reach just 10% of the computerized population, then the +total should reach 80 billion Etexts. + +The Goal of Project Gutenberg is to Give Away One Trillion Etext +Files by the December 31, 2001. [10,000 x 100,000,000=Trillion] +This is ten thousand titles each to one hundred million readers, +which is only 10% of the present number of computer users. 2001 +should have at least twice as many computer users as that, so it +will require us reaching less than 5% of the users in 2001. + + +We need your donations more than ever! + + +All donations should be made to "Project Gutenberg/BU": and are +tax deductible to the extent allowable by law. (BU = Benedictine +University). (Subscriptions to our paper newsletter go to BU.) + +For these and other matters, please mail to: + +Project Gutenberg +P. O. Box 2782 +Champaign, IL 61825 + +When all other email fails try our Executive Director: +Michael S. Hart <hart@pobox.com> + +We would prefer to send you this information by email +(Internet, Bitnet, Compuserve, ATTMAIL or MCImail). + +****** +If you have an FTP program (or emulator), please +FTP directly to the Project Gutenberg archives: +[Mac users, do NOT point and click. . .type] + +ftp uiarchive.cso.uiuc.edu +login: anonymous +password: your@login +cd etext/etext90 through /etext96 +or cd etext/articles [get suggest gut for more information] +dir [to see files] +get or mget [to get files. . .set bin for zip files] +GET INDEX?00.GUT +for a list of books +and +GET NEW GUT for general information +and +MGET GUT* for newsletters. + +**Information prepared by the Project Gutenberg legal advisor** +(Three Pages) + + +***START**THE SMALL PRINT!**FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS**START*** +Why is this "Small Print!" statement here? You know: lawyers. +They tell us you might sue us if there is something wrong with +your copy of this etext, even if you got it for free from +someone other than us, and even if what's wrong is not our +fault. So, among other things, this "Small Print!" statement +disclaims most of our liability to you. It also tells you how +you can distribute copies of this etext if you want to. + +*BEFORE!* YOU USE OR READ THIS ETEXT +By using or reading any part of this PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm +etext, you indicate that you understand, agree to and accept +this "Small Print!" statement. If you do not, you can receive +a refund of the money (if any) you paid for this etext by +sending a request within 30 days of receiving it to the person +you got it from. If you received this etext on a physical +medium (such as a disk), you must return it with your request. + +ABOUT PROJECT GUTENBERG-TM ETEXTS +This PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext, like most PROJECT GUTENBERG- +tm etexts, is a "public domain" work distributed by Professor +Michael S. Hart through the Project Gutenberg Association at +Benedictine University (the "Project"). Among other +things, this means that no one owns a United States copyright +on or for this work, so the Project (and you!) can copy and +distribute it in the United States without permission and +without paying copyright royalties. Special rules, set forth +below, apply if you wish to copy and distribute this etext +under the Project's "PROJECT GUTENBERG" trademark. + +To create these etexts, the Project expends considerable +efforts to identify, transcribe and proofread public domain +works. Despite these efforts, the Project's etexts and any +medium they may be on may contain "Defects". Among other +things, Defects may take the form of incomplete, inaccurate or +corrupt data, transcription errors, a copyright or other +intellectual property infringement, a defective or damaged +disk or other etext medium, a computer virus, or computer +codes that damage or cannot be read by your equipment. + +LIMITED WARRANTY; DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES +But for the "Right of Replacement or Refund" described below, +[1] the Project (and any other party you may receive this +etext from as a PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext) disclaims all +liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including +legal fees, and [2] YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE OR +UNDER STRICT LIABILITY, OR FOR BREACH OF WARRANTY OR CONTRACT, +INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE +OR INCIDENTAL DAMAGES, EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE +POSSIBILITY OF SUCH DAMAGES. + +If you discover a Defect in this etext within 90 days of +receiving it, you can receive a refund of the money (if any) +you paid for it by sending an explanatory note within that +time to the person you received it from. If you received it +on a physical medium, you must return it with your note, and +such person may choose to alternatively give you a replacement +copy. If you received it electronically, such person may +choose to alternatively give you a second opportunity to +receive it electronically. + +THIS ETEXT IS OTHERWISE PROVIDED TO YOU "AS-IS". NO OTHER +WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, ARE MADE TO YOU AS +TO THE ETEXT OR ANY MEDIUM IT MAY BE ON, INCLUDING BUT NOT +LIMITED TO WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY OR FITNESS FOR A +PARTICULAR PURPOSE. + +Some states do not allow disclaimers of implied warranties or +the exclusion or limitation of consequential damages, so the +above disclaimers and exclusions may not apply to you, and you +may have other legal rights. + +INDEMNITY +You will indemnify and hold the Project, its directors, +officers, members and agents harmless from all liability, cost +and expense, including legal fees, that arise directly or +indirectly from any of the following that you do or cause: +[1] distribution of this etext, [2] alteration, modification, +or addition to the etext, or [3] any Defect. + +DISTRIBUTION UNDER "PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm" +You may distribute copies of this etext electronically, or by +disk, book or any other medium if you either delete this +"Small Print!" and all other references to Project Gutenberg, +or: + +[1] Only give exact copies of it. Among other things, this + requires that you do not remove, alter or modify the + etext or this "small print!" statement. You may however, + if you wish, distribute this etext in machine readable + binary, compressed, mark-up, or proprietary form, + including any form resulting from conversion by word + processing or hypertext software, but only so long as + *EITHER*: + + [*] The etext, when displayed, is clearly readable, and + does *not* contain characters other than those + intended by the author of the work, although tilde + (~), asterisk (*) and underline (_) characters may + be used to convey punctuation intended by the + author, and additional characters may be used to + indicate hypertext links; OR + + [*] The etext may be readily converted by the reader at + no expense into plain ASCII, EBCDIC or equivalent + form by the program that displays the etext (as is + the case, for instance, with most word processors); + OR + + [*] You provide, or agree to also provide on request at + no additional cost, fee or expense, a copy of the + etext in its original plain ASCII form (or in EBCDIC + or other equivalent proprietary form). + +[2] Honor the etext refund and replacement provisions of this + "Small Print!" statement. + +[3] Pay a trademark license fee to the Project of 20% of the + net profits you derive calculated using the method you + already use to calculate your applicable taxes. If you + don't derive profits, no royalty is due. Royalties are + payable to "Project Gutenberg Association / Benedictine + University" within the 60 days following each + date you prepare (or were legally required to prepare) + your annual (or equivalent periodic) tax return. + +WHAT IF YOU *WANT* TO SEND MONEY EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO? +The Project gratefully accepts contributions in money, time, +scanning machines, OCR software, public domain etexts, royalty +free copyright licenses, and every other sort of contribution +you can think of. Money should be paid to "Project Gutenberg +Association / Benedictine University". + +*END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END* + + + + + +Typed in WordPerfect V7 for Windows 95. +Converted to ASCII DOS delimited text by WP7. +Original WP version is available if desired. +email: Jim@halcyon.com +JimEnnes@aol.com +Jim_Ennes_Jr@juno.com + + + + + +HERMIONE AND HER LITTLE GROUP OF SERIOUS THINKERS + +BY DON MARQUIS + + + + + +CONTENTS + +PROEM Introducing Some of Hermione's Friends + +Sincerity in the Home + +Vibrations + +Aren't the Russians Wonderful? + +How Suffering Purifies One! + +Understanding and One's Own Home + +Thoughts of Heredity and Things + +The Swami Brandranath + +Fothergil Finch, the Poet of Revolt + +How the Swami Happened to Have Seven Wives + +The Romantic Old Days + +Hermione's Boswell Explains + +Symbols and Dew-Hopping + +The Song of the Snore + +Ballads of Understanding + +Hermione on Fashions and War + +Urges and Dogs + +Moods and Poppies + +Concentration + +Soul Mates + +Hermione Takes up Literature + +The World Is Getting Better + +War and Art + +A Spiritual Dialogue + +Will the Best People Receive the Superman Socially? + +The Parasite Woman Must Go! + +The House Beautiful + +Mamma Is So Mid-Victorian + +Voke Easely and His New Art + +Hermione on Superficiality + +Isis, the Astrologist + +The Simple Home Festivals + +Citronella and Stegomyia + +Hermione's Salon Opens (Verse) + +The Perfume Factory + +On Being Other-Worldly + +Parents, and Their Influence + +Fothergil Finch Tell of His Revolt Against Organized Society + +The Exotic and the Unemployed + +Souls and Toes + +Kultur and Things + +The Spirit of Christmas + +Poor Dear Mamma and Fothergil Finch + +Prison Reform and Poise + +An Example of Psychic Power + +Some Beautiful Thoughts + +The Bourgeois Element and Background + +Taking Up the Liquor Problem + +The Japanese are Wonderful, If You Get What I Mean + +She Refuses to Give UP the Cosmos + +The Cave Man + +The Little Group Gives a Pagan Masque + +Sympathy + +Blouses, Bulgars, and Buttermilk + +Twilight Sleep + +Intuition + +Stimulating Influences + +Politics + +Hermione on Psychical Research + +Envoy Hermione the Deathless + + + + +HERMIONE + + +PROEM + + +(Introducing some of Hermione's Friends) + + + +I visited one night, of late, +Thoughts Underworld, the Brainstorm Slum, +The land of Futile Piffledom; +A salon weird where congregate +Freak, Nut and Bug and Psychic Bum. + +There, there, they sit and cerebrate: +The fervid Pote who never potes, +Great Artists, Male or She, that Talk +But scorn the Pigment and the chalk, +And Cubist sculptors wild as Goats, +Theosophists and Swamis, too, +Musicians mad as Hatters be-- +(E'en puzzled Hatters, two or three!) +Tame anarchists, a dreary crew, +Squib Socialists too damp to sosh, +Fake Hobohemians steeped in suds, +Glib females in Artistic Duds +With Captive Husbands cowed and gauche. + +I saw some Soul Mates side by side +Who said their cute young Souls were pink; +I saw a Genius on the Brink +(Or so he said) of suicide. +I saw a Playwright who had tried +But couldn't make the Public think; +I saw a novelist who cried, +Reading his own Stuff, in his drink; +I saw a vapid egg-eyed Gink +Who said eight times: "Art is my bride!" + +A queen in sandals slammed the Pans +And screamed a Chinese chant at us, +the while a Hippopotamus +Shook tables, book-shelves and divans +With vast Terpsichorean fuss . . . +Some Oriental kind of muss . . . . + +A rat-faced Idiot Boy who slimes +White paper o'er with metric crimes-- +He is a kind of Burbling Blear +Who warbles Sex Slush sad to hear +And mocks God in his stolen rhymes +and wears a ruby in one ear-- +Murder to me: "My Golden Soul +Drinks Song from out a Crystal Bowl. . . . +Drinks Love and Song . . . my Golden Soul!" +I let him live. There were no bricks. + +Or even now that Golden Soul +were treading water in the Styx. + +A Pallid Skirt -- Anemic Wisp, +As bloodless as a stick of chalk -- +Got busy with this line of talk: +"The Sinner is Misunderstood! +How can the Spirit enter in, +Be blended with, the Truly Good +Unless through Sympathy with Sin?" + +"Phryne," I murmured, sad and low, +"I pass the Buck--I do not know!" + +Upon a mantel sat a Bust. . . . +Some Hindu god, pug-faced and squat; +A visage to inspire disgust. . . . +Lord Bilk, the Deity of Rot. . . . +Nay, surely, 'twas the great god Bunk, +For when I wunk at it, it wunk! + +I heard . . . I heard it proved that night +That Fire is Cold, and Black is White, +That Junk is Art, and Art is Junk, +That Virtue's wrong, and Vice is right, +That Death is Life, and Life is Death, +That Breath is Rocks, and Rocks are Breath:-- + +The Cheap and easy paradox +The Food springs, hoping that it shocks. . . . + +Brain-sick I stumbled to the street +And drooled onto a kindly Cop: +"Since moons have feathers on their feet, +Why is your headgear perched on top? +And if you scorn the Commonplace, +Why wear a Nose upon your Face? +And since Pythagoras is mute +on Sex Hygiene and Cosmic Law, +Is your Blonde Beast as Bland a Brute, +As Blind a Brute, as Bernard Shaw? +No doubt, when drilling through the parks, +With Ibsen's Ghost and Old Doc Marx, +You've often seen two Golden Souls +Drink Suds and Sobs from Crystal Bowls?" + +"I ain't," he says, "I ain't, Old Kid, +And I would pinch 'em if I did!" + +"Thank God," I said, "for this, at least: +The world, in spots, is well policed!" + + + + + +SINCERITY IN THE HOME + +SINCERITY should be the keynote of a life, +don't you think? + +Sincerity -- beauty -- use -- these are my +watchwords. + +I heard such an interesting talk on sincerity the +other evening. I belong to a Little Group of Serious +Thinkers who are taking up sincerity in all its +phases this week. + +We discussed Sincerity in the Home. + +So many people's homes, you know, do not +represent anything personal. + +The SINCERE home should be full of purpose and +personality -- decorations, rugs, ornaments, hangings +and all, you know. + +The home shows the soul. + +So I'm doing over our house from top to bottom, +putting personality into it. + +I've a room I call the Ancestor's Room. + +You know, when one has ancestors, one's ancestral +traditions keep one up to the mark, somehow. +You know what I mean -- blood will tell, and all that. +Ancestors help one to be sincere. + +So I've finished my Ancestors' Room with all +sorts of things to remind me of the dear dead-and-gone +people I get my traditions from. + +Heirlooms and portraits and things, you know. + +Of course, all our own family heirlooms were +destroyed in a fire years ago. + +So I had to go to the antique shops for the portraits +and furniture and chairs and snuff boxes and +swords and fire irons and things. + +I bought the loveliest old spinet -- truly, a fine! + +I can sit down to it and image I am my own +grandmother's grandmother, you know. + +And it's wonderful to sit among those old heir- +looms and feel the sense of my ancestors' +personalities throbbing and pulsing all about me! + +I feel, when I sit at the spinet, that my personality +is truly represented by my surroundings at last. + +I feel that I have at last achieved sincerity in the +midst of my traditions. + +And there's a picture of the loveliest old lady . . . +old fashioned costume, you know, and all that . . . +and the hair dressed in a very peculiar way. . . . + +Mamma says its a MADE-UP picture -- not really +an antique at all -- but I can just feel the personality +vibrating from it. + +I got it at a bargain, too. + +I call her -- the picture, you know -- after an +ancestress of mine who came to this country in the +old Colonial days. + +With William the Conqueror, you know -- or +maybe it was William Penn. But it couldn't have +been William Penn, could it? For she went to New +Jersey -- Orange, N.J. Was it William of Orange? +More than likely . . . + +Anyhow, I call the picture after her -- Lady Clarissa, +I call it. She married a commoner, as so +many of the early settlers of this country did. + +When I sit at the spinet and look at Lady Clarissa +I often wonder what people do without family +traditions. + +And its such a comfort to know I'm in a room +that really represents my personality. + + + + +VIBRATIONS + +Have you thought much about Vibrations? + +We're taking them up this week -- a Little +Group of Advanced Thinkers I belong +to, you know -- and they're wonderfully worth +while -- WONDERFULLY so! + +That's what I always ask myself -- is a thing +WORTH WHILE? Or isn't it? + +Vibrations are the key to everything. Atoms +used to be, but Atoms have quite gone out. + +The thing that makes the new dances so wonder- +fully beneficial, you know, is that they give you +Vibrations. + +To an untrained mind, of course, Vibrations +would be dangerous. + +But I always feel that the right sort of mind will +get good out of everything, and the wrong sort will +get harm. + +The most interesting woman talked to us the +other night -- to our little group, you know -- on one- +piece bathing suits and the Greek spirit. + +Don't you just done on the Greeks? + +They have some of the most MODERN ideas -- it +seems we get a lot of our advanced thought from +them, if you get what I mean. + +They were so UNRESTRICTED, too. One has only +to look at their friezes and vases and things to +realize that. + +And the one-piece bathing suit, so the woman +said, was an unconscious modern effort to get back +to the Greek spirit. + +She had a husband with her. He does lecture +or anything, you know. + +But she isn't so very Greek-looking herself, al- +though her spirit is so Greek, so she has this Greek- +looking husband to wear the sandals and the tunics +and the togas and things. + +She calls him Achilles. + +It's quite proper, you know -- Achilles stays be- +hind a screen until she wants to illustrate a +point, and then he comes out with a lyre or a lute +or something, and just stands there and LOOKS Greek. And +then he goes back behind the screen and changes +into the next garment she needs. + +Of course, there are lots of men couldn't stand +it as well as Achilles. But when you come to that, +there are lots of men who don't look so very well +in bathing suits, either. + +And, of course, our American men don't have +the temperament to carry off a thing like that. + +Of course, if we all turned Greek it would be +quite a shock at first to see everybody come +into a dining-room or a drawing-room looking like +Achilles does. + +Not that temperament makes so much difference +as it did a few years ago, you know -- temperament +and personality are going out and individuality is +coming in. + +Have you thought much about automatic writing? + +It's being taken up again, you know. + +Not the vulgar, old-fashioned kind of +spiritualism -- that was so ordinary, wasn't it? + +The new ghosts are different. More -- more -- +well, more REFINED, somehow, you know. Like the +new dances as compared with that horrid turkey trot. + +One should always ask one's self: "Does this +have a refining influence on me; and through me on +the world?" + +For, after all, there is a duty one owes to society +in general. + +Have you seen the new sunshades? + + + + + +AREN'T THE RUSSIANS WONDERFUL? + +Aren't the Russians marvelous people! + +We're been taking up Diaghileff in a serious +way -- our little group, you know -- and +really, he's wonderful! + +Who else but Diaghileff could give those lovely +Russians things the proper accent? + +And accent -- if you know what I mean -- accent +is everything! + +Accent! Accent! What would art be without +accent? + +Accent is coming in -- if you get what I mean -- +and what they call "punch" is going out. I always +thought it was a frightfully vulgar sort of thing, +anyhow -- punch! + +The thing I love about the Russians is their +Orientalism. + +You know there's an old saying that if you find +a Russian you catch a Tartar . . . or something +like that. + +I'm sure that is wrong. . . . I get so MIXED on +quotations. But I always know where I can find +them, if you know what I mean. + +But the Russian verve isn't Oriental, is it? + +Don't you just dote on verve? + +That's what makes Bakst so fascinating, don't +you think? -- his verve + +Though they do say that the Russian operas +don't analyze as well as the German or Italian +ones -- if you get what I mean. + +Though for that matter, who analyzes them? + +One may not know how to analyze an operate, and +yet one may know what one likes! + +I suppose there will be a frightful lot of imitations +of Russian music and ballet now. Don't you +just hate imitators? + +One finds it everywhere -- imitation! It's the sincerest +flattery, they say. But that doesn't excuse it, +do you think? + +There's a girl -- one of my friends, she says she +is -- who is trying to imitate me. My expressions, +you know, and the way I walk and talk, +and all that sort of thing. + +She gets some of my superficial mannerisms . . . +but she can't quite do my things as if they were her +own, you know . . . there is where the accent +comes in again! + + + + +HOW SUFFERING PURIFIES ONE! + +Oh, to go through fire and come out purified! +Suffering is wonderful, isn't it? Simply WONDERFUL! + +The loveliest man talked to us the other night -- +to our Little Group of Serious Thinkers, you know +-- about social ideals and suffering. + +The reason so many attempts to improve things +fail, you know, is because the people who try them +out haven't suffered personally. + +He had the loveliest eyes, this man. + +He made me thin. I said to myself, "After all, +have I suffered? Have I been purified by fire?" + +And I decided that I had -- that is spiritually, +you know. + +The suffering -- the spiritual suffering -- that I +undergo through being misunderstood is something FRIGHTFUL! + +Mamma discourages every Cause I take up. So does Papa. + +I get no sympathy in my devotion to my ideals. +Only opposition! + +And from a child I have had such a high-strung, +sensitive nervous organization that opposition of +any sort has made me ill. + +There are some temperaments like that. + +Once when I was quite small and Mamma +threatened to spank me, I had convulsions. + +And nothing but opposition, opposition, +opposition now! + +Only we advanced thinkers know what it is to +suffer! To go through fire for our ideals! + +And what is physical suffering by the side of +spiritual suffering? + +I so often think of that when I am engaged in +sociological work. Only the other night -- it was +raining and chilly, you know -- some of us went +down in the auto to one of the missions and looked +at the sufferers who were being cared for. + +And the thought came to me all of a sudden: +"Yes, physical suffering may be relieved -- but what +is there to relieve spiritual suffering like mine?" + +Though, of course, it improves one. + +I think it is beginning to show in my eyes. + +I looked at them for nearly two hours in the +mirror last evening, trying to be quite certain. + +And, you know, there's a kind of look in them +that's never been there until recently. A kind of +a -- a ---- + +Well, it's an INTANGIBLE look, if you get what I mean. + +Not exactly the HUNGRY look, more of a YEARNING look! + +Thank heaven, though, I can control it -- one +should always be captain of one's soul, shouldn't +one? + +I hide it at times. Because one must hide one's +suffering from the world, mustn't one? + +But at other times I let it show. + +And, really, with practice, I think I am going +to manage it so that I can turn it off and on -- if +you get what I mean -- almost at will. + +Because, you know, in certain costumes that look +will be QUITE unbecoming. + +Quite out of Harmony. And Inner Beauty only +comes through Inner Harmony, doesn't it? + +Harmony! Harmony! Oh, to be in accord with +the Infinite! + +Nearly every night before I go to bed I ask myself, +"have I vibrated in tune with the Infinite today, +or have I failed?" + + + + +UNDERSTANDING, AND ONE'S OWN HOME + +It's TERRIBLE when one can't get understanding +in one's own family! + +Papa has very little real sympathy for my +advanced ideas. And as for Mamma! + +Sometimes I think I shall WRITE! + +Express myself, my real Ego, in Song. + +Not rhymes, of course. If I worked a year I +couldn't make two lines rhyme. + +But rhyme is going out, anyhow. + +Vers Libre is all the rage now. + +We took it up not long ago -- our Little Group +of Serious Thinkers, you know -- and I feel +confident it is My Medium of Expression. + +It is so untrammeled, isn't it? + +And one should be untrammeled, both in Art and +Life, shouldn't one? + +Often I ask myself, at the close of day: "Have I +been untrammeled today? Or have I FAILED? + +If I could put my real Ego -- and how wonderful +the Ego is, isn't it? -- into vers libre, even Papa +might understand me. + +I have always yearned to be understood! + +I have drawn back from matrimony again and +again because I thought: "Will he understand me? +Will he see my real Ego? Or will he not?" + +Only the other evening I was talking to the loveliest +man, who has been misunderstood by his wife. +It is FRIGHTFUL! + +He is a sculptor. A cubist sculptor. But he +looks quite respectable -- really, some very good +people receive him. + +And he has the most wonderful eyes -- sympathetic, +you know, and psychic -- but oh! so pure, too! + +He dotes on purity. He told me that. + +His wife does not understand him. She does +not see his real Ego. + +He said to me: "I can read you like an open +book. You are yearning. You are yearning for +real understanding. No one has EVER understood you. +Is that not so? Is that not your secret? + +Alas! It was. I could not deny it. + +I said to him: "But is real understanding EVER attainable?" + +He sighed and said: "Alas! The Unattainable!" + +I knew why he sighed--there is so much of it -- +the Unattainable! + +"What one attains," I said, "is often so intangible -- +do you not find it so?" + +"Alas!" he said, "the Intangible!" + +And I felt, somehow -- in a queer psychic way +that is elusive, you know -- strengthened and +sweetened spiritually by our sad little talk. + +Our real Egos had been in communion. That's +what he said. + +He has nine very commonplace children, and his +wife is very difficult socially. + +She insists on filling some sort of commercial +position, although he says her place is in the home. + +So they have grown apart. People don't invite +her places. Only him. + +Oh! to be understood! + + + + +THOUGHTS ON HEREDITY AND THINGS + +Isn't Heredity wonderful, though! + +We've been going into it rather deeply -- +My little Group of Serious, you know. + +And, really, when you get into it, it's quite complicated. +All about Homozygotes and Heterozygotes, you know. + +The Homozygotes are -- well, you might call +them the aristocrats, you know; thoroughbreds. + +And the Heterozygotes are the hybrids. + +Only, of course, they don't need to be goats at +all. + +Not but what they COULD be goats, you know, just +as easily as horses or cows or human beings. + +But whether goats or humans, don't you think +the great lesson of Heredity is that Blood will Tell? + +Really the farther I go into Philosophy and +Science and such things the more clearly I see what a +fund of truth there is in the old simple proverbs! + +People used to find out great truths by Instinct, +you know; and now they use Research -- vaccinate +guinea pigs, you know, and all that sort of thing. + +Instinct! Isn't Instinct wonderful! + +And Intuition, too! + +You know, I have the most remarkable intuition +at times! Have I ever told you that I'm fright- +fully psychic? + +Mr. Finch, the poet -- you know Fothergil Finch, +don't you? -- he writes vers libre and poetry both +-- Mr. Finch said to me the other evening, "You +are EXTREMELY psychic!" + +"How did you know it?" I asked him. + +"Ah!" he said, "how DOES one know these things?" + +And how true that is, when you come to think +it over! How DOES one know? + +He has the great magnetic eyes! I could feel +them drawing my thoughts from me as we talked. + +"You have a secret," he said. + +"Yes," I said. And to myself I added, "Alas!" + +"Your secret is," he said, "that there is a +difference between you and the other girls." + +It was positively uncanny! I'VE felt that for +years! But no one else had ever suspected it before. + +"Mr. Finch," I said, "I must have TOLD you that -- +or else it was just a wild guess. You COULDN'T have +gotten it psychically. HOW did you know it?" + +"One knows these things," he said -- a trifle sadly, +I thought. "They come to one -- out of the + +Silences; one knows not how. It is better not to +ask how! It is better not to question! It is better +to accept! Do you not feel it so? + +Sometimes I think that Fothergil Finch is the +only man who has ever understood me. + +You see, I am Dual in my personality. + +There is the real Ego, and there is the Alter Ego. + +And, besides these, I have so many moods which +do not come from either one of my Egos! They +come from my Subliminal Consciousness! + +Isn't the Subliminal Consciousness wonderful; +simply WONDERFUL? + +We're going to take it up in a serious way some +evening next week, and thresh it out thoroughly. + +But I must run along. I have an engagement +with my dressmaker at two o'clock. You know, +I've really found one who can make my gowns +interpret my inner spirit. + + + + +THE SWAMI BRANDRANATH + +I HEARD such a lovely lecture the other night +on the Cosmos. + +A Little Group of Advanced Women that I +belong to are specializing this winter on the Cosmos. + +We took it up, you know, because the other topics +we were studying included it so frequently. And +it's wonderful, really WONDERFUL! + +Of course, an untrained mind will grapple with +it in vain. One's interest must be serious and sincere. +One must devote time to it., + +Otherwise one will get more harm than good +out of it, you know. + +It's like the Russian dances that way. + +They are so primal, those dances! And all those +primal things are dangerous, don't you think? +Unless one has poise! + +It's odd, too, that some of the most primal +people have the most poise, isn't it? + +The Swami Brandranath was like that. I've told +you bout the Swami Brandramath, haven't I? + +He wore such lovely robes! You can't buy silk +like that in this country. + +And he had such a PURE look in this eyes. So +many of these magnetic people lack that pure look, +you know. + +He used to give talks to a Little Group of Serious +Thinkers I belong to. + +He taught us to go into the Silences -- only we +never quite learned, for some of the girls would +giggle. There are always people like that. The +dear Swami! -- he was so patient! It was +Occidental levity, he said, and we couldn't help it. + +That is one of the main differences between the +Orient and the Occident, you know. + +How wonderful they are, the Orientals. And +just think of India, with all its yogis and bazaars +and mahatmas and howdahs and rajahs and things! + +He was a Brahmin, the Swami was. A Brahmin +and a Burman are the same thing, you know. + +It's a caste, like belonging to one of our best +families. + +The Swami explained about the marks of caste, +and so forth, to us. + +And then one of the girls asked him if he was +tattooed! + +The idea! + + + + +FOTHERGIL FINCH, THE POET OF REVOLT + +Isn't it odd how some of the most radical and +advanced and virile of the leaders in the New +Art and the New Thought don't look it at all? + +There's Fothergil Finch, for instance. Nobody +could be more virile than Fothy is in his Soul. +Fothy's Inner Ego, if you get what I mean, is a +Giant in Revolt all the time. + +And yet to look at Fothy you wouldn't think he +was a Modern Cave Man. Not that he looks like +a weakling, you know. Butwell, if you get what +I mean -- you'd think Fothy might write about +violets instead of thunderbolts. + +Dear Papa is ENTIRELY mistaken about him. + +Only yesterday dear papa said to me, "Hermione, +if you don't keep that damned little vers libre run +away from here I'll put him to work, and he'll die +of it." + +But you couldn't expect Papa to appreciate Fothy. +Papa is SO reactionary and conservative. + +And Fothy's life is one long, grim, desperate +struggle against Conventionality, and Social +Injustice, and Smugness, and the Established Order, and +Complacence. He is forever being a martyr to the +New and True in Art and Life. + +Last night he read me his latest poem -- one of his +greatest, he says -- in which he tries to tell just what +his Real Self is. It goes: + +Look at me! +Behold, I am founding a New Movement! +Observe me. . . . I am in Revolt! +I revolt! +Now persecute me, persecute me, damn you, + persecute me, curse you, persecute me! +Philistine, +Bourgeois, +Slave, +Serf, +Capitalist, +Respectabilities that you are, +Persecute me! +Bah! +You ask me, do you, what am I in revolt against? +Against you, fool, dolt, idiot, against you, against + everything! +Against Heavy, Hell and punctuation . . . against + Life, Death, rhyme and rhythm . . . +Persecute me, now, persecute me, curse you, + persecute me! +Slave that you are . . . what do Marriage, + Tooth-brushes, Nail-files, the Decalogue, + Handkerchiefs, Newton's Law of Gravity, Capital, + Barbers, Property, Publishers, Courts, Rhyming + Dictionaries, Clothes, Dollars, mean to Me? + +I am a Giant, I am a Titan, I am a Hercules of + Liberty, I am Prometheus, I am the Jess Willard + of the New Cerebral Pugilism, I am the Mod- + ern Cave Man, I am the Comrade of the Cosmic + Urge, I have kicked off the Boots of Superstition, + and I run wild along the Milky Way + without ingrowing toenails, +I am I! +Curse you, what are You? +You are only You! +Nothing more! +Ha! +Bah! . . . persecute me, now persecute me! + +Fothy always gets excited and trembles and +chokes when he reads his own poetry, and while +he was reading it Papa came into the room and +disgraced himself by asking if there was +any MONEY in that kind of poetry, and Fothy +was so agitated that he fairly screamed when he +said: + +"Money . . . money . . . curse money! Money +is one of the things I am in revolt against. . . . + +Money is death and damnation to the free spirit!" + +Papa said he was sorry to hear that; he said one +of his companies needed an ad writer, and he didn't +have any objection to hiring a free spirit with a +punch, but he couldn't consider getting anyone to +write ads that hated money, for there was a salary +attached to the job. + +And Fothy said: "You are trying to bribe me! +Capitalism is casting its net over me! You are trying +to make me a serf: trying to silence a Free +Voice! But I will resist! I will not be enslaved! +I will not write ads. I will not have a job. + +And then Papa said he was glad to hear Fothy's +sentiments. He had been afraid, he said, that Fothy +had matrimonial designs about me. And the +man who married HIS daughter would probably have +to stand for possessing a good deal of wealth, too, +for he had always intended doing something very +handsome for his son-in-law. So if Fothy didn't +want money, he wouldn't want me, for an enormous +amount of it would go to me. + +Papa, you know, thinks he can be awfully sarcastic. + +So many Earth Persons pride themselves on their +sarcasm, don't you think? + +And Papa is an Earth Person entirely. I've got +his horoscope. He isn't AT ALL spiritual. + +But you can image that the whole scene was +FRIGHTFULLY embarrassing to me -- I will NEVER forgive Papa! + +And I haven't made up my mind AT ALL about +Fothy. But what I do know is this: once I get my +mind made up, I WILL NOT stand for opposition form +ANY source. + +One must be an Individualist, or perish! + + + + +HOW THE SWAMI HAPPENED TO HAVE SEVEN WIVES + +Isn't it terrible about that elephant at the Zoo +-- Oh, you know! -- it's like Gunga Din, only, +of course, it isn't Gunga Din at all. + +Anyhow, he's CHAINED FOR LIFE! I suppose some- +one gave him tobacco for a joke and it made him +cross. I've heard of those cases, haven't you? + +An elephant is such a -- such a -- well, NOBLE beast, +isn't he? + +It's transmigration of souls makes them that way, +perhaps. + +Oh is it a Rajah? + +Anyhow, it sits on top of an elephant. + +We took up transmigration of souls one time -- +our little Group of Serious Thinkers, you know -- +and it's wonderful; simply WONDERFUL! + +That was when the Swami Brandranath used to +talk to us. The dear Swami! Such eyes -- so pure +and yet so magnetic! -- I have never seen in a human +being. + +The eye is the window of the soul, you know. + +He's in jail now, the poor, dear Swami. But he +wasn't really a bigamist at all. You see, he had +seven spiritual planes. All of us do, only most of +us don't know it. But he could get from one plane +to another quite easily. + +Of course, he couldn't remember what he'd done +on one plane while he was on the next one above +or below it. And that's the way he happened to +have seven wives -- one for each spiritual plane. + +Only the Court took a sordid view of it. It seems +there was something about life insurance mixed +up with it, too. + +The Occidentals are so apt to miss the spiritual +sweetness of the Oriental, don't you think? + +We are -- all but the Leaders of Thought, and a +little group, here and there -- so commonplace. + +Don't you LOATHE the commonplace? + +Not loathe, really, of course -- because the harmonious +mind does not let itself be disturbed. + +The harmonious mind realizes that dirt is only +useful matter in the wrong place, as Tennyson sings +so sweetly somewhere. + +Tennyson has quite gone out, of course. He is +so -- so, well, if you get what I mean -- so mid- +Victorian, somehow. + +It seems he WAS mid-Victorian all the time, but +it's only recently that it's been found out on him. + +Though I always will think of "come Into the +Garden, Maud," as one of the world's sweetest +little epics. + +I'm very independent that way, in spite of the +critics. After all, criticism comes down to a question +of individual taste, doesn't it? That is, in the +final analysis. + +Independence! That is what this age needs. +Nearly every night before I got to bed I say to myself: +"Have I been independent today? Or have I FAILED?" + +I believe in those little spiritual examinations, +don't you? + +It helps one to keep in tune with the Infinite, you +know. + +The Infinite! How much it comprises! And +how little we really understand it! + +We're going to take it up, the Infinite, in a serious +way soon -- our Little Group of Advanced +Thinkers, you know. + + + + +THE ROMANTIC OLD DAYS + +It must have been terribly difficult getting around +in the days before automobiles were invented, +or railroads or anything like that. + +Though, of course, it was wonderfully romantic, +too. + +The old coaching days, particularly, when everybody +blew on horns as they drove from town to +town, and there were highwaymen and cavaliers +with swords and all those people, you know, riding +by the coaches. + +Don't you just DOTE on romance? I do! + +But, of course, there's no place for it in our hurried +modern life, and I suppose we shouldn't regret it. + +But now and then I sigh over it. Like dropping +a tear, you know, in a dear old chest perfumed with +lavender and old roses. + +I always say that one can be advanced and in +the van of modern progress, and still drop a tear, +you know. + +Do you think that all this study of sex hygiene +means the death of romance? + +It's a serious thought, isn't it? + +But what I always say is: "Which of these +things will do the most GOOD in the world?" + +Especially good to the POOR! + +You know how frightfully interested I am in the poor. + +I make that my test. I always say to myself: +"Which will do the most good to the great masses?" + +I take such a serious interest in the MASSES! + +We should think twice before we take romance out +of their lives and replace it with science of any kind. + +For, after all, you know, they represent the Future. + +We should all think of the Future. + +That's what makes the Feminist Movement such +a WONDERFUL thing -- it is moving right straight ahead +toward the Future! + +I'm thinking of being a Suffragist again. I was +once, you know, but I resigned. + +The sashes and banners are such a frightful shade +of yellow, you know. So I quit. + +Beauty, after all, is the chief thing. What, after +all, do all our reforms come to, if the world is not +to be made more beautiful because of them? + +And I simply CANNOT wear yellow. + + + + +HERMIONE'S BOSWELL EXPLAINS + +Believe me, 'tis not with elation + I dwell on Hermione's madness; +The result of my rapt contemplation + Is sadness, a terrible sadness! + +I weep when I note how she drivels; + I sigh o'er her fake philanthropies; +I am pained when I see how she frivols, + Like a kitten, with serious topics. + +It is grief that her mental condition + Inspires, not laughter or scorning; +If she has any use, 'til her Mission + To stand as a Horrible Warning. + +I am moral, essentially moral; + I am grave, and hate everything trashy, +And that is the reason I quarrel + With intellects flighty and flashy. + +I yearn for the truth, I am earnest; + I yearn to face facts without blinking, + +Of all of my years, quite the yearnest + Is my yearn to be thorough in thinking. + +That's why I'm severe with this darling, + Nor pardon nor whitewash nor gloss her, -- +The linnet -- the parrot -- the starling! + I weep over her and expose her. + + + + +SYMBOLS AND DEW-HOPPING + +Last week the Loveliest man lectured to us -- +to our Little Group of Serious Thinkers, +you know -- on the Ultimate Symbolism. In +art and life both, you know. + +It was simply wonderful -- WONDERFUL! + +Art, you know, used to be full of symbolism. + +But now, it seems, symbolism has dropped out +of Art, and Nature has taken it up. + +Odd, isn't it? But really not surprising when +you come to think about it. + +For, you know, Nature is always trying to keep +up with advanced ideas -- evolving and evolving +toward the Superman. + +And the Superwoman, too. + +I think it is the duty of us who are advanced +thinkers to give Nature a worthy idea to evolve +toward, don't you? + +To set Nature a mark to come up to, you know. + +For what is the use of evolution if it doesn't +evolve forward instead of backward? + +And the Best People, I think, should feel a sense +of social responsibility and give evolution a model. + +Each should be a Symbol -- that's what I always +ask myself each night now: "Have I been a Symbol +today? Or have I failed to be a symbol?" + +Down at the beach last week I nearly drowned -- +you don't mean to say you haven't heard of it? It +was frightful. + +I'd always heard that, when a person sinks, his +whole past life passes before him in review. + +But it didn't with me. What I said as I went +down was: "Have I been a Symbol? Or have I +failed?" + +And the life guard who got me out -- he was simply +the most gorgeous man! -- burned bronze, you +know, and with shoulders like a Greek god! -- and +with the most wonderful eyes and white teeth -- he +asked me, the guard did, "What, marm?" + +It was fearfully disappointing! Sometimes they +are college men, you know, just life-guarding +through the summer. But would any college man +have said, "What, marm?" + +And then he went and saved a blonde creature +in the most scandalous bathing suit I ever saw. + +He saved one in the most business-like way, too, +as if he were a waiter, you know, passing from one +table to another. + +No wonder the social fabric is crumbling when +quite impossible people like life guards permit +themselves to become blase' over such matters! + +The lower classes are very discouraging anyhow, +don't you think? -- after all we do for them in the +way of philanthropy and sociology and uplifting +them generally, you know! + +Of course, I haven't lost my interest in sociology +-- not by any means. I always hold fast the thought +that all the world are brothers. + +I'm taking up Dew-hopping next week. It's a +wonderful new nerve cure. Formerly it was quite +the thing to walk barefoot in the dew at dawn. + +But at this new place I've discovered they don't +merely walk -- that's going out, quite. They HOP. +Like frogs and toads, you know. + +It brings the patients into closer kinship with the +electric currents of the earth, hopping does, the +doctor says. It's WONDERFUL! + +He is the loveliest man -- with mystic eyes! -- the +doctor is. + + + + +THE SONG OF THE SNORE + +Fothergil Finch, Hermione's friend, the +vers libre poet, dodges through life harried +and hunted by one pursuing Fear. + +"Some day," he said to me -- + +(It is Hermione's Boswell who is speaking in this +sketch, in the first person, and not Hermione, the +incomparable.) -- + +"Some day," Fothergil finch said to me, the +other night, in a tone of intense, bitter conviction, +"some day It will get me! Some day I will overtake +me. The great Beat, Popularity, which pursues me! +Some day It will clutch me and tear me +and devour my Soul! Some day I will be a +Popular Writer!" + +It is my own impression that Fothergil's fears +are exaggerated; but they are very real to him. He +visualizes his own soul as a fugitive climbing higher +and higher, running faster and faster, to escape +this Beast. Perhaps Fothergil secretly hopes that +the speed of his gong will induce combustion, and +he will leap from the topmost hills of Art, flaming, +directly into the heavens, there to burn and shine +immortality, an authentic star. Well, well, we all +have our little plane, our little vanities! + +"Fothergil," I said, cheerily, "Popularity has not +overtaken you yet. Cheer up -- perhaps it never +will." + +We were in Fothergil's studio in Greenwich Village, +where I had gone to see how his poem on +Moonlight was getting along. He strode to the +window. Fothergil is not tall, and he is slightly +pigeon-toed -- the fleshly toes of Fothergil symbolize +the toes of his ever-fleecing soul -- but he strides. +Female poets undulate. Erotic male poets saunter. +Tramp poets lurch and swagger. Fothergil, being +a vers libre poet, a Prophet of the Virile, a Little +Brother of the Cosmic Urge, is compelled by what +his verse is to stride vigorously across rooms as if +they were vast desert places, in spite of what +his toes are. He strode magnificently, triumphantly, +to the window and flung the shade up and looked +out at the amorphous mist creeping +in across the roofs. The crawling fog must +have suggested his great, gray Dread, for presently +he turned away with a shudder and sank upon a +couch and moaned. + +'Ah, Heaven! Popularity! The disgrace of it -- +the horror of it! Popularity! Ignominy! When it +catches me -- when it happens ----" + +He plucked from his pocket a small phial and held +it up toward the light and gazed upon it desperately +and raptly. + +"I am never without this!" he said. "It is my +means of escape. I will not be taken unawares! +I carry it always. At night it is beneath my pillow. +The day it happens -- the moment I feel myself in +the grip of Popularity----" + +I caught his hand; in his excitement he was +raising the poison to his lips. + +"What I cannot understand, Fothergil," I said, +"is why a Poet of the Virile, a Reincarnation of the +Cave Man -- excuse me, but that is what you are +being this year, is it not ? -- should give way to Fear. +Is it not more in character to meet this Beast and +slay It? Is there not a certain contradiction between +your profession and your practice?" + +"More than a contradiction," he said eagerly. "It +is more than contradictory! It is paradoxical!" + +I eliminate much that followed. When Fothergil +gets started on the paradox, time passes. He is +never really interested in things until he has dis- +covered the paradoxical quality in them. Sometimes +I think that his enthusiasm over himself is +due to the fact that he discovered early in life that +he himself was a paradox -- and sometimes I think +that discovery is the explanation of his enthusiasm +for the paradox. + +"What," said Fothergil, "is the most paradoxical +thing in the world? The Human Snore! It seems +Ugly-yet it is Beautiful! It seems a trivial function +of the body -- and yet it is the Key to the +Soul ----" + +"The Key to the Soul?" + +"Man sleeps," he said, "and his Conscious Mind +is in abeyance. But his Subconscious Mind is still +awake. It functions. It has its opportunity to utter +itself. The Snore is the Voice of the Soul! And +not only the Soul of the individual but of the Soul +of the race. All the experiences of man, in his +ascent from the mire to his present altitude, are +retained in the Subconscious Mind-his fights, his +struggles, his falls, his recoveries. And his dreams +and nightmares are racial memories of these things. +Snores are the language in which he expresses them. +Interpret the Snore, and you have the psychic history +of the ascent of man from Caliban to Shakespeare! + +"And I can interpret it! I have listened to a +million Snores, and learned the language of the +Soul! Night after night, for years, I harked to +the Human Snore -- in summer, hastening from +park bench to beach and back again; in winter, +haunting the missions and lodging houses. Ah, +Heavens! with what devotion, with what passion +of the discoverer, have I not pursued the Human +Snore! I have gone miles to listen to some snore +that was reported to be peculiar; I have denied my +self luxuries, pleasures, and at times even food, in +order to hire reluctant persons to Snore for me! + +"And I have written the Epic of the Snore in +vers libre. You shall hear the prelude!" + +And this is Fothergil's prelude: + + +Snore me a song of the soul, +Oh, sleeper, snore! +Whistle me, wheeze me, grunkle and grunt, gurgle + and snort me a Virile stave! +Snore till the Cosmos shakes! +On the wings of a snore I fly backward a billion + years, and grasp the mastodon and I tear him + limb from limb, +And with his thigh hone I heat the dinosaur to + death, for I am Virile! +Snore! Snore! Snore! +Snore, O struggling and troubled and squirming + and suffering and choking and purple-faced + sleeper, snore! +Snore me the sound of the brutal struggle when the + big bull planets bellowed and fought with one + another. in the bloody dawn of time for the + love of little yellow-haired moons, +Snore! +Snore till Chaos raps with his boot on the walls of +Cosmos and kicks to the landlord! + +Turn, choke, twist and struggle, sleeper, and snore + me the song of life in the making, +Sneeze me a universe full of star-dust, +Snore me back to the days when I was a Cave Man, + and with my bare hands slew the walrus, for + I am Virile! +Snore the death-rattle of the walrus, O struggling + sleeper, snore! +Snore me ---- + + +But I was compelled to leave. There is a great +deal of it, Fothergil says. If you know Fothergil +you are aware that when he declaims his Virile +verses he becomes excited; he swells physically; +sometimes he looks quite five feet tall in his moments +of expansion; all this is very bad for him. +More than once the declamation of his poem, +"Myself and the Cosmic Urge," has sent him shaking +to the tea urn. + +Before I left I was able to calm him somewhat. +But with calm came reflection. And with reflection +came his great, gray Dread again. + +When I left,. Fothergil was looking out of the +window and shuddering, as if the Monster +Popularity might be hiding behind the neighboring +chimneys. One hand clasped the phial caressingly. + +But somehow I doubt that Fothergil will ever be +compelled to drink the poison. + + + + +BALLADE OF UNDERSTANDING + +"Does not the World's stupidity +At times make Serious Thinkers fret?" +I asked the fair Hermione; + "Sometimes," she said, "and yet . . . and + yet . + +We feel we owe the World a debt!" +She waved a slim, bejeweled hand, +She brooded on some vague regret. . + "I hope," she sighed, "you'll UNDERSTAND!" + +"Is not your high Philosophy +Too subtle for the Mob to get?" +I asked . . . She pondered seriously; + "Sometimes," she said, "and yet . . . and + yet . . . + +She trifled with an amulet +Imported from some Orient land. . . . +"What fish can burst the Cosmic Net? . . . + I HOPE," she sighed, "you'll Understand." + +"Art, Science and Psychology, +Causes that rise and shine and set, + +Do all these never weary thee?" -- + "Sometimes," she said, "and yet . . . and yet . +Would Thought and Life have ever met +Unless" . . . She paused. Her lashes fanned +Her eyes, with tears of ardor wet. . . . + "I hope," she sighed, "YOU'LL Understand!" + +"Princess, is Bull the One Best Bet?"- + "Sometimes," she said, "and yet . . . and yet +She mused, and then; in accents bland, +"I hope," she said, "you'll UNDERSTAND!" + + + + +HERMIONE ON FASHIONS AND WAR + +ISN'T war frightful, though; simply FRIGHTFUL! + +What Sherman said it was, you know. + +Though they say there's an economic +condition back of this war, too. + +We took up economics not long ago -- our Little +Group of Serious Thinkers, you know -- and gave +an entire evening to it. + +It's wonderful; simply WONDERFUL! + +Without economics, you know, there couldn't be +any Civilization. + +That's a thought that should give one pause, +isn't it? + +Although, of course, this war may destroy +civilization entirely. + +If I thought it was likely to do that I would join +in the Peace Demonstration at once -- or have they +had it already ? -- the march for peace, you know! +Anyhow, no matter what the personal sacrifice +might be, I would join in. Not that I care to march +in the dust. And black never did become me. But +I suppose there will be some autos. And, well -- +one must sacrifice. + +For if Civilization dies out, what will become of +us then? + +Will we revert to the Primordial? + +Will the Cave Man triumph? + +The very idea gives me the creeps! + +Because, you know, the Cave Man is all right -- +and the Primitive, and all that -- as a protest against +Decadence-and in a LITERARY way -- but if ALL men were Cave Men! + +Well, you know, the thought is frightful; simply frightful! + +You can have a feeling for just ONE Cave Man, +you know, in the midst of Civilization, when a +MILLION Cave Men would ---- + +But the idea is too terrible for words! + +And in this crisis it is Woman who must save the world. + +The loveliest woman -- she's quite advanced, +really, and has the most charming toilettes -- told +our Little Group of Serious Thinkers the other +night that this is the time when Woman must rule +the world. + +It is the test of the New Woman. + +If ANYTHING is saved from the wreck it will be +because of Her. + +She can write letters to the papers, you know, +against war and-and all that sort of thing, you know. + +And, of course, if the Germans and Russians and +English do all get together and conquer Paris, +I suppose they won't kill the modistes and designers. + +Civilization, you know, is not so easily killed +after all. The Romans were conquered, you know, +but all their styles and philosophies and things were +taken up by the Medes and Persians who conquered +them, and have remained unchanged in those +countries ever since. + +But in a time like this, it's comforting to have +a Cause to cling to. + +No matter what happens, the advanced thinkers +must cling together and make their Cause count. + +And if England should conquer France, and put +a king on the throne there again, no doubt there will +be a great revival of fashion, as there was in the +days of Napoleon I. and the Empress Eugenie. + +But if all the advanced thinkers in the world +could only get together in one place and THINK Peace +and Harmony -- sit down in circles, you know, and +send Psychic Vibrations across the ocean -- who can +tell but what the war might not end ? + +The triumph of mind over matter, you know. + +I'm going to propose the idea to our little group +and pass it on to all the other little groups. + +I'd be willing to give up an entire evening to it myself. + + + + +URGES AND DOGS + +We had quite a discussion the other evening +-- our Little Group of Serious Thinkers, +you know -- as to whether it was Idealism +or Materialism that had gotten the Germans into +this dreadful war. + +Isn't Idealism just simply wonderful! + +Fothy Finch said it was neither; he said it was +the Racial Urge. + +It's like the Cosmic Urge, you know; except it's +altogether German, Fothy explained. + +Every once in a while you hear of a New Urge. +That's one of the things that distinguishes Modern +Thought from the old philosophies, don't you +think? + +Although, of course, the Cosmic Urge isn't what +it used to be a year or two ago. + +It's become -- er -- well, VULGARIZED, if you know +what I mean. EVERYBODY'S writing and talking +about it now, don't you know. + +I think, myself, it's going out soon. And a +leader -- a real pioneer in thought, you know, +would scarcely care to talk about it now without a +smile. + +I've just about dropped it myself. It's the same +way with everything exclusive. It soon becomes +common. + +Really, I hadn't worn my white summer furs +three weeks before I saw so many imitations that +I just simply HAD to lay them aside. + +Don't you think people who take up things +like that, after the real leaders have dropped them, +are frightfully lacking in SUBTLETY? + +Oh, Subtlety! Subtlety! WHAT would modern +thought be without Subtlety? + +Personally, I just simply HATE the Obvious. It's +so -- so -- well, so easily seen through, if you know +what I mean. + +Fothy Finch said to me only the other day, "Has +it ever occurred to you, Hermione, that you are NOT +an Obvious sort of Person?" + +It is almost UNCANNY the way Fothergil Finch +can read my thoughts sometimes. We are both so +very psychic. + +Mamma said to me last night, "You are seeing a +great deal of Mr. Finch, Hermione. Do you think +it is right to encourage him if you don't intend to +marry him? What ARE your intentions with regard +to Mr. Finch?" + +I didn't answer her at all -- poor dear Mamma is +SO old-fashioned! + +But I thought to myself ---- + +Well, would it be so IMPOSSIBLE? + +Of course, marriage is a serious thing. One must +look at it from all points of view, if one has a +Social Conscience. + +He has a LOVELY way with dogs, Fothy has. They +trust him instinctively -- he is just DEAR with them. +I have some beauties now, you know. They are +getting so they won't let anyone but Fothy bathe them. + + + + +MOODS AND POPPIES + +We took up the Bhagavad Gita -- our Little +Group of Advanced Thinkers, you know -- +in quite a thorough way the other +evening. + +Isn't the Bhagavad Gita just simply WONDERFUL! + +It has nothing at all to do with Bagdad, you +know -- though at first glance it seems quite like +it might, doesn't it? + +Of course, they're both Oriental -- aren't you just +simply WILD about Oriental things? But really, +they're QUITE different. + +The Bhagavad Gita, you know, is all about +Reincarnation and Karma, and all those lovely old +things. + +When I start my Salon I'm going to have a +Bhagavad Gita Evening -- all in costume, you know. + +I find that when I dress in harmony with the +Idea I RADIATE so much more effectively, if you +get what I mean. + +Fothergil Finch is the same way. + +He writes his best vers libre things in a purple +dressing-gown. + +There's an amber-colored pane of glass in his +studio skylight, and he has to sit and wait and wait +and wait until the moonlight falls through that pane +onto his paper, and then it only stays long enough +so he can write a few lines, and he can't go on with +the poem until he comes again. + +He brought me one last night -- he wrote it to me + yes, really! -- and he waited and waited for +enough moonlight to do it, and caught a terrible +cold in his head, poor dear Fothy. + +It goes like this: + +Poppies, poppies, silver poppies in the moonlight, + poppies! +Silver poppies, +Silver poppies in the moonlight, +Youth! +Poppies poppies, crimson poppies in the sunset, + Love! +Poppies, poppies, poppies! +Black poppies in the midnight, +Death! +Three colors of poppies! +One color is silver, +The second color is crimson, +The third color is black, +And if there were a fourth color it would be +green! + +Alas! Why is there never a fourth color? + +Poppies, poppies, poppies, but no Green Poppy! + +I asked the little crippled girl who sells poppies to + Buy bread for the drunken father who beats her, + +And she said, "I, too, seek the fourth color!" + +I asked the boy who drives the grocer's delivery + wagon, the old apple woman without teeth, the + morgue keeper, the plumber, the janitor, the + red-armed waffle baker in the window of a + restaurant full of marble-topped tables and + pallid-looking girls, the subway guard and the + millionaire, + +And they all said, +"Poppies, poppies, poppies, +We have never known but three colors!" +I am a Great Virile Spirit; +I, with my Ego, +I will give the world its Desire! +I, the strong! +I, the daring! +I will create a Green Poppy! + +That about being Virile is just like Fothy! He +prides himself on being Virile, you know -- Poor +dear Fothy! + +He said until he saw me he had always been satisfied +with silver and red and black poppies, but +as soon as he knew me he felt there MUST be a +Green Poppy somewhere. + +It is likely a mood of my soul, you know -- the +Green Poppy is! + +Isn't it simply wonderful! + + + + +CONCENTRATION + +Isn't it just simply terrible the way the Balkans +are bombarding Venice . . . all those beautiful +Doges and things, you know. + +I suppose there will be nothing left, just simply +nothing, of the city that Byron wrote about in +in -- what was it? Oh, yes, in "Childe Harold to +the Dark Tower Came." + +That's one comforting thing to think of if this +country ever gets into a war, isn't it? I mean that +we haven't any of those lovely old things that can +be bombarded, you know. + +I suppose if we ever did get into war someone +like Edison would invent something quick, you +know, and it would be all over in a few hours. + +Isn't inventive science wonderful! Just simply +wonderful! + +It's so -- so -- well, so DYNAMIC, if you get what I +mean. Isn't it? + +Don't you just DOTE on dynamic things? + +Dynamic personalities, especially. + +I've often thought if I had it to do over again +I'd go in less for psychics and more for dynamics. + +But then there are so many things that a modern +thinker must keep up with, aren't there? + +And it's easy enough to concentrate one's mind on +one or two things, but I often find it terribly difficult +to concentrate on ten or twelve different things +all at the same time. + +And one must if one is to keep up with the very +latest in Thought and Life. + +Concentration! Concentration! That is the key +to it all! Nearly every night when I am alone with +my own Ego I go into the Silences for a little period +of Spiritual Self-Examination and I always ask +myself: "Have I Concentrated today? Really +Concentrated? Or have I failed?" + +I call these little times my Psychic Inquisitions. + +In the hurry of this crowded age one must find +time to get along with one's self, must one not? +Fothy Finch has written a beautiful thing about the +hurry of this crowded age which I wish everyone +could hang over his desk. + +Well, I must be going on now. I have a committee +meeting for this afternoon. I can't for the +life of me remember whether it's about suffrage -- +Oh, yes, I marched! -- or about some relief fund. + + + + +SOUL MATES + +I'm taking up Bergson this week. + +Next week I'm going to take up Etruscan +vases and the Montessori system. + +Oh, no, I haven't lost my interest in sociology. + +Only the other night we went down in the auto +and watch the bread line. + +Of course, one can take up TOO MANY things. + +It's the spirit in which you take up a thing that +counts. + +Sometimes I think the spirit in which you take +a thing up counts more than the thing itself -- counts +in its effect on you, you know. + +Of course, the way to get the real meaning out +of any thing is to put yourself in a receptive attitude. + +In serious things the attitude counts for everything. +One mustn't scoff. + +If you look seriously and scientifically you'll' +see there's a great deal more than you suspected +in all this affinity and soul mate craze, for instance. + +Not that I care much for the words "soul mate" +and "affinity" particularly; they have been so +VULGARIZED, somehow. + +The Best People don't use those terms any more. + +Psychic harmony is the new term. + +The loveliest man explained all about it to us the +other day. I belong to a Little Group of Thinkers, +who take a serious interest in these things, you +know. + +We are trying to find out how to make our +psychic powers count for the betterment of the +world. I am very psychic. Some are now. + +This man had the most interesting eyes and the +silkiest beard, and he said his aura was pink. + +If he should meet a girl, you know, with an aura +just the shade of pink that his aura is, why then +they would know they were in psychic harmony. + +Simple, isn't it? But then all truly great ideas +ARE simple, aren't they? + +But if his aura was blue, and her aura was yellow, +then, of course, they would quarrel. That's +what makes so much domestic unhappiness. + +But he said something that gave me the most +frightfully insecure feeling. + +He said the aura CHANGES its color as the soul progresses. + +Two people may be in harmony today, and both +have pink auras, and in a year hers may be green +and his golden. + +What desperate chances a woman takes when +she marries, doesn't she? + +I sometimes think life must have been a much +more comfortable thing before the world got to +be so terribly advanced. + +But, of course, it is our duty to sacrifice personal +comfort for the future of the race and the +betterment of the world. + +As I was looking at the bread line the thought +came to me that the chief difference between this +advanced age and other ages was in the fact that +people today are willing to take a serious interest +in such things. + +People are willing to sacrifice themselves today, +you know. + +It is food for optimism, don't you think? + +Not that I was really so uncomfortable in the +auto, you know. I had on my new mink coat. + + + + +HERMIONE TAKES UP LITERATURE + +We've been going in for Astrological +Research lately -- our Little Group of +Modern Thinkers, you know -- and we've +picked our own personal stars. + +Only it seems such a shame, doesn't it, that one +isn't allowed to CHANGE stars? Keeping the same +star all your life is rather monotonous, don't you +think? + +Though, of course, if one changed and got some- +one else's star things might be frightfully +complicated, mightn't they? + +But it would make a charming little story, +wouldn't it, for a girl to change stars, you know, +and find that her new star belonged to some quite +nice young man, and, of course, after that, their +destinies would be one. + +I get some of the most ORIGINAL plots for stories! + +Fothergil Finch has often said to me that that +is one difference between genius and talent. When +you have genius, you know, things like that just +come to you; but if you only have talent you must +work and WORK for them. + +"If I only hd your spontaneity, Hermione!" +Fothergil often says. + +And really, it's never been any trouble for me at +all to dash off an idea, though of course they +would have to be touched up by the editors a little +before they could be printed. + +Fothergil said the other night I should try poetry. + +"Why, Fothy," I said, "if I lived a hundred years +I never could make two lines rhyme with each +other!" + +But he said Rhyme was out of fashion anyhow, +and -- would you believe it? -- while we were talking +I got an idea for a poem and just dashed it off +then and there -- a vers libre poem you know, and it +goes: + + What becomes of + People when they die? + I used to ask when I was a little child, + And now even since + I am grown up I am not sure that I know! + +"Fothy," I said, "It was so easy -- that makes me +afraid it isn't really good!" + +"Ah," he said, "that modesty PROVES you are a +genius! Heavens, what would I not give to +have you spontaneity, your modesty, your spontaneity --" + +But I interrupted him. Another idea had come +to me -- just like that, and -- would you believe it? +I dashed off another one, right then and there! It +went: + + I see the rain fall. + It is no effort for the rain to fall. + Why is it no effort? + Because it falls spontaneously! + O Spontaneity! Spontaneity! + Rain is genius, + Genius is rain! + Fall, fall, rain! + +Fothy is going to get them printed -- he knows a +lot of vers libre publishers -- if Papa will only put +up the money. And one nice thing about poor dear +Papa is that he always will put it up. + +So that night I wrote twenty or thirty more +of them, and they were ALL good -- ALL works of +genius -- they ALL came to me just like the first ones! + +The last one came to me just as I was going to +bed. I looked out of the window and saw the moon +and ran and got a pencil and wrote: + + I see the moon out of the window. + I wonder what it thinks of me? + Wouldn't the moon and I both be surprised + If we found that neither of us + Though anything at all about the other? + +The book's going to be vellum, you know, and +that sort of thing. I'm going to have a gown just +like the cover and give a fete when it comes out. + +The worst thing about being literary, though, is +that it makes one feel so RESPONSIBLE for the gift, +if you know what I mean, doesn't it? + + + + +THE WORLD IS GETTING BETTER + +DR. JAGADES CHUNDER BOSE says that +plants are almost as sensitive as human beings -- +they have feelings and susceptibilities, +you know, and all that sort of thing. + +Isn't it wonderful how the Hindus find these +things out? + +Soul speaking to soul, I suppose. + +But I have scarcely been able to eat comfortably +since I read it. + +Every time I sit down to a salad it makes me +feel quite like a cannibal! + +And to think, I was just on the point of becoming +a vegetarian, too! + +I suppose to be on the safe side one should eat +nothing but minerals. + +But, of course, advanced thinkers will have to +take the matter up seriously and discover a way +out -- some day we will live on aromas and +electricity, no doubt. + +Don't you think the world is getting kinder? +A hundred years ago, for instance, no one would +have cared whether plants suffer pain or not -- people +wouldn't have given it a second though, you know. + +And now, though, they will have to keep on +eating them until something else is invented, they +will do it with a shudder and won't enjoy them near +so much. The world is losing much of its cruelty +and thoughtlessness. Upward! Onward! Is the +slogan. + +Do you like my new coat? Unborn lamb skin, +you know. Isn't it lovely? + + + + +WAR AND ART + +THIS war is going to have a tremendous in- +fluence on Art -- vitalize it, you know, and +make it REAL, and all that sort of thing. +In fact, it's doing it already. We took up the war +last night -- our Little Group of Serious Thinkers, +you know -- in quite a serious way and considered +it thoroughly in all its aspects and we decided +that it would put more SOUL into Art. + +And into life, too, you know. + +Already you can see it on every hand how much +serious purpose it is putting into lives that were +merely trivial before. Even poor, dear Mamma -- +and really, it would be hard to imagine a more +trivial person than Mamma! -- is knitting socks. + +She is going to send them to the Poles. She +wanted to send them to the Belgians. + +But I said to her, "Positively, Mamma, you are +ALWAYS behind the times. Don't you know the +Belgians are going out and the Poles are coming in?" + +And, you know, it's been months since really +Smart People have knit for the Belgians. The Poles +are QUITE the thing now. + +It's strange how great movements keep going on +and on from mountain peak to mountain peak of +usefulness like that, isn't it? -- changing their +direction now and then as evolution itself does, +but always progressing, progressing! + +That is one wonderful thing about evolution -- it +ALWAYS progresses. + +When one thinks it over, one grows more and +more conscious that the human race owes a great +deal to Evolution, doesn't one? + +WHAT could we have done without it? + +It's as somebody said about something else one +time -- if we hadn't had it, you know, it would have +been necessary to invent it, though for the life of +me, I can't remember who it was or what he said +about it. Although likely it was Madame de Stael. +We took her up once and it developed that she had +said a most surprising number of things like that +things, you know, that would be quite quotable if +you could only remember them. + +Isn't memory a wonderful facility, though? + +I've always intended to go in for developing mine +systematically and scientifically. + +But I've never done it because I always forget +whether I should order the book-shop people to +send home a work on numismatics or a work on +mnemonics. One of them is about money, you +know, and the other is about memory. And once +when I was shopping and thought I had it right it +turned out -- the book did, when I got it home -- to +be all about air and things. Pneumatics, you know! +Wasn't it perfectly ridiculous? + +But, of course, one learns by one's mistakes. + +Have you seen dear Nijinsky? + +We were discussing him last evening -- our little +group, you know -- and decided that while he has +more Personality than Mordkin he has less +Temperament, if you get what I mean. + +One of the girls said last evening, "Mordkin is +more exotic, but Nijinsky is more esoteric." + +And another said, "One of them shows intellect +obviously mingled with spirit, but the other shows +spirit occultly mingled with intellect." + +Fothergil Finch said, "They are alike in their +differences, but subtly differentiated in their +likenesses, n'est-cd pas?" + +Fothy has a simply delightful faculty of summing +a thing up in a sentence like that, but it makes him +very vain if you show you think so; so I put him +in his place and closed the discussion with one remark: + +"It is all," I said, "it is ALL a question of Interpretation." + +And, quite seriously, when you come to think +about it, it usually is, isn't it? + + + + +A SPIRITUAL DIALOGUE + +Last night I met Hermione, +And eagerly she said to me: +"Thoughts from the ambient everywhere +Electrify our worldly air." + +"My soul," I said, "grabs off such hints +As butter, whether pats or prints, +Receives and holds all unaware +Small strands of drifting, golden hair. +But have YOU thought, O Maiden fair, +O, have you thought profoundly of +The psychic consciousness in crows? +Or why the Malay when in love +Wears rubber earrings on his toes?" + +The lady shook her lovely head -- +'Twas coiffed divinely -- and she said: +"Have you reflected on the part +Primeval instinct plays in Art? +It's simply wonderful the way +Old things grow new from day to day!" + +"That's true," I said, "I often ape +The Ape to get my Art in shape -- +And with the Simian going strong, + Behold, another Rennysawng!" + +"Perhaps," she said, "across the verge +Of darkness, from the Cosmic Urge, +The Light is speeding in bright waves, +E'en now to show the way to slaves!" + +"The thought," I said, "is cheerful -- but +These Swamis WILL chew betel-nut!" + +"Alas!" she said, "alas! too true! +But oh! it's wonderful of you +To sympathize and understand --" +(She gestured with a jeweled hand) -- +"The joy of being understood!" + +"Our talk," I said, "has done me good." + + + + +WILL THE BEST PEOPLE +RECEIVE THE SUPERMAN SOCIALLY? + +WE'VE been taking up Metabolism lately -- +our Little Group of Serious Thinkers, you +know -- and it's wonderful; just simply +WONDERFUL! + +I really don't know how I got along for so many +years without it -- it opens up such new vistas, +doesn't it? + +I can never think in the same way again about +even the most trivial things since I have learned +all about Protoplasm and -- and -- well, all these +marvelous scientific things, you know. + +Isn't Science DELIGHTFUL! + +There's the Cosmos, for instance. It had always +been there, you know. But nobody knew much +about it until Scientists took it up in a serious way. + +And now I, for one, feel that I couldn't do +without it! + +Although, of course, one feels one's responsibilities +toward it too, and that is apt to be rather +trying at times unless one has a truly earnest nature +and is prepared to make sacrifices. + +If the Cosmos is to be improved, what is there +that can improve it except Evolution? + +And unless we who are serious thinkers give +Evolution a mark to reach, how can we be sure that +Evolution will Evolve in the right direction? + +I have worried myself half to death at times +over the Superman! + +You know I feel personally responsible, to a +certain extent, about what he will be like when he +gets here. If he isn't what he should be, you know, +it will be the fault of those of us who are the +leaders in thought today -- it will be because we +haven't started him right, you know. +Mamma -- poor dear Mamma is SO unadvanced, +you know! -- has an idea that when the Superman +does get here he won't be at all the sort of person +that one would care to receive socially. + +"Hermione," she said to me only the other day, +"no Superman shall EVER come into MY house!" + +She heard some of my friends, you know, talking +about the Superman and Eugenics, and she has +an idea that he will be horribly improper. + +"I consider that the Superman would be a DANGEROUS +influence in the life of a young woman," said Mamma. + +"Mamma," I told her, you are FRIGHTFULLY behind +the times! There isn't a doubt in the world that +when the Superman does come he will be taken +up by the Best People. Anarchists and Socialists +go everywhere now, and dress just like other people, +and ;you can hardly tell them, and it will be +the same way with the Superman." + +What Mamma lacks is contact. Contact with -- +with -- well, she lacks Contact, if you get what I +mean. + +So many of the elder generation DO lack Contact, +don't you think? + +Although, of course, it would be very hard to +have Contact and Background at the same time. + +And if one must choose between Contact and +Background, the choice is apt to be puzzling at +times. + +Although, of course, it is useless to reason too +much on things like that. Intuition often succeeds +where reason fails, especially if one is at all Psychic. + +Well, I must go. I must hurry to my costumer's. + +I'm have a special costume made, you know. +We've been taking up Spiritualism again -- our little +group, you know. And I'm going to give a Spirit +Fete, and of course it will take a great deal of +dressing and arranging and decoration. + +Papa says it will be a Ghost Dance, but he is so +terribly frivolous and irreverent at times. + +Don't you just simply LOATHE frivolity? + + + + + +THE PARASITE WOMAN MUST GO! + +THE Parasite Woman must go! + +Our Little Group of Serious Thinkers +took up the Parasite Woman last night in +quite a thorough way. One of the most interesting +women you ever listened to gave us a little talk +about the Parasite Woman, you know. + +And we decided that the Parasite Woman has +NOTHING to Contribute to the Next Generation. + +Oh, these Parasite Women! It just simply makes +my blood boil to her about them! I don't know +when I have been so indignant! + +With the world so full of work to be done for +the Cause -- for ALL the Causes, you know -- they +just sit around selfishly at home all wrapped up +in their own families, or children, if they're married, +and do nothing at all for the Evolution of +the Ego and the Development of the Race, and the +Conscious Guidance of the Next Generation, or +anything like that. + +Thank goodness I could never be a Parasite Woman! + +And, yet, I PITY them, too. + +I'm thinking quite seriously of starting a little +Mission of my own for the purpose of appealing +to and reforming the Parasite Women among my +acquaintances. + +Of course it will take organization, and that +means I will have money to start it and +keep it going. + +But Papa will give me the money all right. That +is one thing about poor, dear Papa -- he doesn't +understand the new movements at all, but he WILL +give me money. And he never asks what I do +with it. + +Now and then, of course, he scolds me a little -- he +told me the other day that I cost him nearly as much +as a war. But I can always jolly him, you know, +when he gets that way. Men are so easily managed +and flattered. + +I suppose my Mission will take quite a LOT of +money, too. But it is my DUTY, and I am willing to +make ANY sacrifice -- we modern thinkers are used +to making sacrifices for our Cause! + +And it is worth a lot of sacrifice to make the +Parasite Woman over into an Awakened and +Enlightened Member of Society, independent of the +Man-Made System that has shackled her for so long. + +What is nobler than Emancipation? + +Of course, I'll have to have a Secretary, And +to get one especially training in organizing the +Mission will cost quite a bit, probably. + +But Papa will never miss it. + +And I think I'll have a MAN for a Secretary. +One that is quite presentable socially, you +know. For the Secretary will have to attend to a +lot of the details. I will give some teas and +entertainments and things, just to get the Parasite +Women I know interested. + +And there's nothing like the right sort of a man +to get women to cooperate in some Cause that aims +for Woman's Liberty. + +And I suppose, really, TWO Secretaries would be +better. And they will have to be men who can +dance the new dances well, too. That counts a +lot nowadays in getting girls to come to places. + +I feel that I have Found my Work! One's work +lies at one's hand, if one could but see it, always. +And mine is to Save the Parasite Women I know +from Themselves and their Frivolity. + +I will coax the first cheque out of Papa this very +evening! It may take some management and +jollying, but--well, Papa is EASY! + + + +THE HOUSE BEAUTIFUL + +WE'RE taking up the House Beautiful -- our +Little Group of Serious Thinkers, you +know -- for we've decided that Environment +has more effect on personality than Heredity. + +Interior decoration is the greatest of the arts -- +don't you think? -- because it furnishes the proper +setting for the spirit. + +The loveliest woman gave us a talk on interior +decoration the other night -- she wears these slinky, +Greek things, you know, with straw sandals, when +the weather permits -- and I engaged her to do the +house over. + +But right away a problem presented itself -- +whether to have the house done to fit my personality +or whether to have the house done to fit the thing +I want my personality to evolve into, and trust the +environment to help in the evolution. + +Modern thought complicates LIFE immensely, +doesn't it? + +But I always feel that it is my duty to give the +best in myself to these problems. + +Someone must help Evolution evolve. Someone +must be unselfish enough to give the cosmos new +marks to come up to. + +And who but the serious thinkers are willing to +sacrifice themselves? + +Well, we finally decided to do every room in +the house differently -- each one to fit a mood, you +know. + +There's one room now I call "Aspiration," where +I go for my little spiritual examinations. + +And the next room beyond that is "Resolve." + +And then there's a room I call "Brotherly Love," +where I go to think out how to help the masses. + +For of course I haven't lost my interest in +sociological problems. + +In fact I'm having some new dresses made -- +simple, quiet looking things, you know -- for the +express purpose of visiting the very poor in and +asking them questions about themselves. + +Though I must admit that since helping the war +sufferers came into fashion friendly visiting has +rather gone out. + + + + +MAMA IS SO MID-VICTORIAN + +WE'VE been taking ;up Hedonism lately -- +our Little Group of Modern Thinkers, +you know -- and it's wonderful, just +simply WONDERFUL! + +Though Mamma -- poor dear Mamma is so +hopelessly old fashioned; -- has entirely the +wrong idea about it. + +"Hermione," she said to me the other evening, +after the little talk, "WHAT did the lecturer call +himself?" + +"He's a Hedonist," I said. + +"Indeed!" she said, "and what sort of modern +impropriety is Hedonism? Is it something about +Sex, or is it something about Psychics?" + +I simply couldn't speak. + +I just gave her a look and walked out of the +room. It is absolutely useless to attempt to explain +anything to Mamma. + +She is so Mid-Victorian! + +And Mid-Victorianism has quite gone out, you +know. Really. The loveliest man gave us a talk +on the Mid-Victorian recently, and when he was +done there wasn't a one of us that didn't go and +hide our Tennysons and Ruskins. + +Although I always WILL like "Come into the Garden, Maud." + +But he did it with such HUMOR, you know. Isn't +a sense of humor a perfectly WONDERFUL thing? + +A sense of humor is a sense of proportion, you +know -- he brought that out so cleverly, the +anti-Mid-Victorian man did. + +Though so many people who have a sense of +humor are so -- so, well so QUEER about it, if you +get what I mean. That is, if you know they have +one, of course you're naturally watching for them +to say humorous things; and they're forever saying +the sort of things that puzzle you, because you have +never heard those things before in just that way, +and if you DO laugh they're so apt to act as if you +were laughing in the WRONG place! + +And one doesn't dare NOT to laugh, does one? +It's really quite unfair and unkind sometimes! +Don't you think so? + +We took up a volume on The Analysis of Humor +one winter -- our Little Group of Serious Thinkers, +you know -- and read it completely through, and +before the winter was over it got so there wasn't +a one of us that dared NOT to laugh at anything +any other one said and -- well, it got rather ghastly +before spring. Because even if someone wanted to +know if a person needed an umbrella someone else +would laugh. + +Well, I must be going now. I have a committee +meeting at three this afternoon. We're going in +for this one-day Women's Strike, you know -- our +little group is. + + + + +VOKE EASELEY AND HIS NEW ART + +FOR my acquaintance with Voke Easeley -- -- + +(Hermione's reporter, and not Hermione +herself, is speaking now.) -- -- + +For my acquaintance with Voke Easeley and his +new art, I am indebted to Fothergil Finch. + +Fothergil is a kind of genius hound. He scurries +sleuthing around the town ever on the scent of +something queer and caviar. He is well trained and +never kills what he catches himself; he takes it to +Hermione; and after Hermione has tired of it I +am at liberty to do what I please with it. + +The most remarkable thing about Voke Easeley +at a casual glance is his Adam's apple. It is not +only the largest Adam's apple I have ever seen, and +the hardest looking one, and the most active one, +but it is also the most intelligent looking one. Voke +Easeley's face expresses very little. His eyes are +small and full and green. His mouth, while large, +misses significance. His nose, indeed, is big; but +it is mild; it is a tame nose; one feels no more +character in it than in a false nose. His chin +and forehead retreat ingloriously from the battle +of life. + +But all the personality which his eyes should +show, all the force which should dwell in his +nose, all the temperamental qualities that should +reveal themselves in his mouth and chin, all the +genius which should illumine his brow -- these dwell +within his Adam's apple. The man has run entirely +to that feature; his moods, his emotions, his +thoughts, his passions, his appetites, his beliefs, his +doubts, his hopes, his fears, his resolves, his +despairs, his defeats, his exaltations -- all, all make +themselves known subtly in the eccentric motions +of that unusual Adam's apple. + +When I saw him first in action I did not at once +get it. He stood stiffly erect in the center of +Hermione's drawing-room, surrounded by the serious +thinkers, with his head thrown back and his Adam's +apple thrust forward, and gave vent to a series of +strange noises. Beside him stood a very slender +lady, all dressed in apple green, with a long green +wand in her hand, and on the end of the wand +was an artificial apple blossom. This she waved +jerkily in front of Voke Easeley's eyes, and his +Adam's apple moved as the wand moved, and from +his mouth came the wild sounds in response to it. + +Soon I realized that she was conducting him as +if he were an orchestra. + +But still I did not get it. For it was not words, +it was nothing so articulate as speech, that Voke +Easeley uttered. Nor was it, to my ear, song. And +yet, as I listened, I began to see that a wild rhythm +pervaded the utterance; the Adam;'s apple leapt, +danced, swung round, twinkled, bounded, slid and +leapt again in time with a certain rough barbaric +measure; the sounds themselves were all discords, +but discords with a purpose; discords that took each +other by the hand and kicked and stamped their +brutal way together toward some objective point. + +I led Fothergil into a corner. + +"What is it?" I whispered. It is always well, at +one of Hermione's soul fights, to get your cue +before the conversation officially starts. If you don't +know what is going to be talked about before the +talk starts the chances are that you never will know +from the talk itself. + +"A New Art!" said Fothergil. And then he led +me into the hall and explained. + +What Gertrude Stein has done for prose, what +the wilder vers libre bards are doing for poetry, +what cubists and futurists are doing for painting +and sculpture, that Voke Easeley is doing for +vocal music. + +"He is painting sound portraits with his larynx +now," said Fothergil. "And the beautiful part of +it is that he is absolutely tone deaf! He doesn't +know a thing about music. He tried for years to +learn and couldn't. The only way he knows when +you strike a chord on the piano is because he doesn't +like chords near as well as he does discords. He +has gone right back to the dog, the wolf, the cave +man, the tiger, the bear, the wind, the rock slide, +the thunder and the earthquake for his language. +He interprets life in the terms of natural sounds, +which are discords nearly always; but he has added +brains to them and made them all the moods of +the human soul!" + +"And the lady in green?" + +"That is his wife -- he can do nothing without +her. There is the most complete psychic accord +between them. It is beautiful! Beautiful!" + +When we returned the lady in green was +announcing: + +"The next selection is a Voke Easeley impression +of the Soul of Wagner gazing at the sunrise from +the peak of the Jungfrau." + +The wand waved; the Adam's Apple leapt, and +they were off. What followed cannot be indicated +typographically. But if a cat were a sawmill, and +a dog were a gigantic cart full of tin cans bouncing +through a stone-paved street, and that dog and +that cat hated each other and were telling each +other so, it would sound much like it. + +It was well received. Except by Ravenswood Wimble. +He always has to have his little critical fling. + +"The peak of the Jungfrau!" he grumbled. +"Jungfrau indeed! It was Mont Blanc! It was very +wonderfully and subtly Mont Blanc! But the +Jungfrau -- never!" + +"Hermione," I said, "what do you think of the +New Art?" + +"It's wonderful!" she breathed, "just simply +wonderful! So esoteric, and yet so simple! But +there is one thing I am going to speak to Mrs. Voke +Easely about -- one improvement I am going to +suggest. His ears, you know -- don't you think they +are too large? Or too red, at least, for their size? +They catch the eye too much -- they take away from +the effect. Before he sings here again I will have +Mrs. Easeley bob them off a little." + + + + +HERMIONE ON SUPERFICIALITY + +AREN'T you just crazy about the Moral Uplift? + +It's coming into every department of life +now and one just simply HAS to keep up with it in +order to talk intelligently these days. + +Not that one can talk too freely about it in mixed +company, you know. + +There are getting to be the awfullest lot of moral +subjects that one can't talk about generally, aren't +there? + +Eugenics and sex hygiene and all these plays and +books with a moral purpose, you know. + +Of course lots of people DO talk about them +generally. I did myself for quite a while. And then +another girl and I got some books and studied up +what the things we had been talking of really were +and it shocked us horribly! + +Mamma has been trying to get me to give up the +moral uplift entirely, but you've just simply GOT to +talk it or be out of date. + +Of course the whole thing depends upon whether +you are a serious thinker -- if you're sincere, REALLY +sincere, you can take up anything and get good out of it. + +The loveliest man talked to us last night -- to our +Little Group of Advanced Thinkers, you know. + +He said the curse of the age and the country was +superficiality. People aren't thorough, you know. + +I've noticed that myself and I agree with him. +If one is going to take things up and show a serious +interest in them one must not limit one's self to a +few phases. + +One must be broad. One must be thorough. +One must cover the whole field of thought. + +Our little group this winter has been trying to +do that. So far we've take up Bergson, socialism, +psychology, Rabindranath Tagore, the meaning of +welfare work, culinary science, the new movements +in art -- and ever so many more things I can't re- +member now. + +For the rest of Lent we're going to take up the +Cosmic Consciousness. + +One of the girls thought it would be a nice sort +of thing to take up during Lent -- a quiet kind of +thing, you know; not like feminism or chemistry. + +Have you seen any of the new parti-colored boots +yet? + +Isn't it an absurd idea? + +And yet, you know -- if it made for Beauty! + +That is what one must always say to one's self +must one not? I mean: Does it make for Beauty? + +That's the reason I left the Suffrage Party, you +know. They wanted me to wear one of those hor- +rid yellow sashes. And my complexion can't stand +yellow. So I quit the Suffrage Party right there. + + + + +ISIS, THE ASTROLOGIST + +WE'RE taking up astrology quiet seriously -- +our Little Group of Serious Thinkers, you +know -- and we've hired the loveliest lady +astrologer to cast our horoscopes and give +us a talk and get us started right. + +She wrote a letter to me--the most perfectly +fascinating letter -- and I told her to call, and we +looked her over. She wore a beautiful sky-blue +gown with gold stars on it -- one of those Greek +ones, you know, like poor, dear Isadora Duncan +wore -- and a gold star in the middle of her +forehead. + +It makes her look like a unicorn, that star," +Ravenswood Wimble said. But then nobody ever +pleases Ravenswood Wimble completely. He is +so -- if you get me. + +"If a unicorn, then a celestial unicorn," Fothy +Finch said. Fothy is too dear for anything; he is +always hunting for the good in people, like Apollo, +or Euripides -- which was it? -- when they gave him +the basket full of wheat and chaff, and he separated +them. Or maybe it was Diogenes. + +She has six sisters, and they are all astrologers, +and they call them the Pleiades. + +Although Voke Easeley, in his horrid slangy way, +said: "Pleiades? She's a Bear!" + +Don't you just utterly loathe slang? + +Bit I was going to tell you about the lovely letter +she wrote -- that's what attracted me to her at the +first. + +"Have you never asked yourself," it began +"'Why was I born?'" + +Fancy knowing that about one! If there is one +question I have asked myself thousands and +thousands of times it is, "Why was I born?" + +And then the letter went on to talk about +horoscopes and the Inevitable. + +"We may not overcome the inevitable," it said, +"but it is ours to see that the Inevitable does not +overcome us." + +Oh, the Inevitable! The Inevitable! + +How often I have thought of the Inevitable with +despair! + +And it has never occurred to me before that one +could take it and use it as one pleased. But it seems +one can if one knows about it beforehand. It is +like Destiny that way. If one is ignorant of one's +Destiny, it comes upon one with a surprise. But +if one knows beforehand what one's Destiny is to +be, one can make onself the master of it. That is +where the horoscope comes in handy, you know. + +After dipping into Astrology I will never again +be afraid of the Inevitable. + +As the Letter says: "Every woman with her +horoscope before her, and her Soul back of her, +should be able to solve any problem and meet any +situation that may occur in her life." + +Ravenswood Wimble wanted to know, when he +met the lady -- did I tell you that her professional +name is Isis? -- what would happen if her Soul was +before her and her horoscope back of her. But Isis +just simply froze him with a look. + +Don't you think that levity is horrid in the midst +of vital affairs like that? + +But I suppose every little group has someone in +it that thinks he or she has to be quippy and +facetious at times. + +Not but what I have a sense of humor myself. + +I think a sense of humor is the saving grace, if +you get what I mean. + +But no one should try to use it unless he is +perfectly sure that everyone understands he is being +humorous. + +We are going to take up the sense of humor -- +our Little Group of Thinkers, you know -- in a +serious way soon. + +But the Swami doesn't like Isis. Poor, dear +Swami! She is a charlatan, he says. And she +doesn't like him. "My dear," she said to me, "are +you SURE he really goes into the Silences? Or does +he just PRETEND to?" + +Isn't it awful about geniuses that way -- how jealous +they ARE of each other? Especially psychics! +We had two mediums the same evening a year or +two ago who actually quarreled over which one of +them a certain spirit control belonged to. + + + + +THE SIMPLE HOME FESTIVALS + +DON'T you just love the simple old festivals, +like Thanksgiving Day and Christmas? + +That's is one thing that Papa and Mamma +and I agree about. And this year we had a very +simple sort of Thanksgiving Day. + +Of course, it's rather a bore if you have to invite +a lot of relations. + +But one must always sacrifice something to gain +the worth-while things, mustn't one? + +And what is more worth while than simplicity? + +Simplicity! Simplicity! Isn't it truly WONDERFUL! + +Nearly every night before I go to bed I ask myself: +"have I been simple and genuine today? Or have +I FAILED? + +Papa always has two maiden aunts to Thanks- +giving dinner. Dear old souls, I suppose, but +frumps, you know. + +And Fothergil Finch was there, too. I asked +poor dear Fothy, because otherwise he would have +had to eat in some restaurant. + +I tried to be agreeable to Papa's aunts -- of +course. I suppose they are my great-aunts, but I +never felt REALLY related to them -- but how could he +know how terribly unadvanced they are? + +Fothy's only real interests center about Art, you +know. And if he had talked of Art it would have +been better. + +But, as he told me later, he thought he should +try to meet my people on their own ground and +talk of something practical. + +Something with a direct bearing on life, you know. + +So he asked Aunt Evelyn what she thought of +Trial Marriages. + +She didn't know exactly what he meant at first, +but Aunt Fanny whispered something to her and +she turned white and said, "Mercy!" + +Poor dear Fothy saw he must be on the wrong +track, so he changed the subject and began to tell +Aunt Fanny the plot of a new problem play. One +of the sex ones, you know. + +"Heavens," said Aunt Fanny, and began to tremble. + +And they drew their chairs nearer together and +each one took a bottle of smelling salts out of a +little black bag, and they sat and trembled and +smelled their salts and stared at him perfectly +fascinated. + +This embarrassed Fothy, but he though his mistake +had been in talking about anything artistic, +like a play, so he changed the subject again. He +told me afterward that he felt if he could get onto +a really PRACTICAL subject all would go well. + +So he asked Aunt Evelyn what she thought about Genetics. + +"What are they?" asked Aunt Evelyn, her teeth chattering. + +"Why, Eugenics," said Fothy. And then he had +to explain all about Eugenics. + +They sat perfectly still and stared at him, and he +felt sure he had them interested at last, and he +talked on and on about Eugenics and the Future +Race, you know, and that led him back to Trial +Marriages, and then he go onto the Twilight Sleep. + +And, as he said himself afterward, what could +be more practical? + +But, you know, commonplace people never +appreciate the efforts that serious thinkers make for +them, and Aunt Evelyn refused to come to the +table at all when dinner was announced. She said +she had lost her appetite and felt faint. + +But Aunt Emmy came. She asked the blessing. +Papa always has her do that on Thanksgiving Day +and Christmas and New Year's. And she made a +regular prayer out of it -- prayed for Fothy, you +know, right before him; and prayed for me too. It +was awful. + +And afterward poor dear Fothy said he wished +he had talked about Art. + +"It's safe," I said; "then people can't get +offended, for nobody knows what you mean at all." + +"Oh," said Fothy, "nobody does?" And he went +away quite melancholy and injured. + + + + +CITRONELLA AND STEGOMYIA + +WE were talking about famous love affairs +the other evening, and Fothergil Finch +said he was thinking of writing a ballad +about Citronella and Stegomyia. + +And, of course, everybody pretended they knew +who Citronella and Stegomyia were. Mrs. Voke +Easeley -- You've heard about Voke Easeley and his +New Art, Haven't you? -- Mrs. Voke Easeley said: + +"But don't you think those old Italian love affairs +have been done to death?" + +"Italian?" said Fothy, raising his eyebrows at +Mrs. Voke Easeley. + +You know, really, there wasn't a one of them +knew who Citronella and Stegomyia were; but they +were all pretending, and they saw Mrs. Voke Easeley +was in bad. And she saw it, too, and tried to +save herself. + +"Of course," she said, "Citronella and Stegomyia +weren't Italian lovers THEMSELVES. But so many of +the old Italian poets have written about them that +I always think of them as glowing stars in that +wonderful, wonderful galaxy of Italian romance!" + +Fothy can be very mean when he wants to. So he said: + +"I don't read Italian, Mrs. Easeley. I have been +forced to get all my information about Citronella +and Stegomyia from English writers. Maybe you +would be good enough to tell me what Italian poet +it is who has turned out the most recent version of +Citronella and Stegomyia?" + +Mrs. Voke Easeley answered without a moment's +hesitation: "Why, D'Annunzio, of course." + +That made everybody waver again. And Aurelia +Dart said -- she's that girl with the beautiful arms, +you know, who plays the harp and always has a +man or two to carry it about wherever she goes -- +somebody else's husband, if she can manage it -- +Aurelia said: + +"D'Annunzio, of course! Passages of it have +been set to music." + +"Won't you play some of it?" asked Fothy, very +politely. + +"It has never been arranged for the harp," said +Aurelia. "But if Mrs. Easely can remember some +of the lines, and will be good enough to repeat them, +I will improvise for it." + +That put it up to Mrs. Easeley again, you know. +She hates Aurelia, and Aurelia knows it. Voke +Easeley carried Aurelia's harp around almost all +last winter. And the only way Mrs. Easeley could +break Voke of it was to bring their little girl along +the one that has convulsions so easily, you know. +And then when Voke was getting Aurelia's harp +ready for her the little girl would have a convulsion, +and Mrs. Easeley would turn her over to Voke, +and Voke would have to take the little girl home, +and Mrs. Easeley would stay and say what a family +man and what a devoted husband Voke was, for an +artist. + +Well, Mrs. Easeley wasn't stumped at all. She +got up and repeated something. I took up Italian +poetry one winter, and we made a special study of +D'Annunzio; but I didn't remember what Mrs. +Easeley recited. But Aurelia harped to it. +Improvising is one of the best things she does. + +And everybody said how lovely it was and how +much soul there was in it, and, "Poor Stegomyia! +Poor Citronella!" + +The Swami said it reminded him of some passages +in Tagore that hadn't been translated into +English yet. + +Voke Easeley said: "The plaint of Citronella is +full of a passion of dream that only the Italian +poets have found the language for." + +Fothy winked at me and I made an excuse and +slipped into the library and looked them up -- and, +well, would you believe it! -- they weren't lovers at +all! And I might have known it from the first, for +I always use citronella for mosquitoes in the country. + +They were still pretending when I got back, all +of them, and Aurelia was saying: "Citronella differs +psychologically from Juliet -- she is more like +poor, dear Francesca in her feeling of the cosmic +inevitability of tragedy. But stegomyia had a strain +of Hamlet in him." + +"Yes, a strain of Hamlet," said Voke Easeley. +"A strain of Hamlet in his nature, Aurelia -- and +more than a strain of Tristram!" + +"It is a thing that Maeterlinck should have written, +in his earlier manner," said Mrs. Voke Easeley. + +"The story has its Irish counterpart, too," said +Leila Brown, who rather specializes, you know, on +all those lovely Lady Gregory things. "I have always +wondered why Yeats or Synge hasn't used it." + +"The essential story is older than Ireland," said +the Swami. "It is older than Buddha. There are +three versions of it in Sanskrit, and the young men +sing it to this day in Benares." + +Affectation! Affectation! Oh, how I abhor +affectation! + +It was perfectly HORRID of Fothy just the same. + +ANYONE might have been fooled. + +I might have been myself, if I were not too +intellectually honest, and Fothy hadn't tipped me +the wink. + + + + +HERMIONE'S SALON OPENS + + I + +Perchance last night you felt the world careen, +Leap in its orbit like a punished pup +Which hath a hornet on his burning bean? +Last night, last night -- historic yestere'en! -- +Hermione's Salon was opened up! + + II + +Without, the night was cold. But Thought, within, +Roared through the rooms as red and hot as Sin. +Without, the night was calm; within, the surge +And snap of Thought kept up a crackling din +As if in sport the well-known Cosmic Urge +with Psychic Slapsticks whacked the dome and Shin +Of Swami, Serious Thinker, Ghost and Goat. +From soup to nuts, from Nut to Super Freak, +From clams to coffee, all the Clans were there. +The groggy Soul Mate groping for its Twin, +The burgling free verse Blear, the Hobo Pote, + +Clairvoyant, Cubist bug and Burlapped Greek, +Souse Socialists and queens with bright green hair, +Ginks leading barbered Art Dogs trimmed and Sleek, +The Greenwich Stable Dwellers, Mule and Mare, +Pal Anarchs, tamed and wrapped in evening duds, +Philosophers who go wherever suds +Flow free, musicians hunting after eats, +And sandaled dames who hang from either ear +Strange lumps -- "art jools" -- the size of pickled beets, +Writers that write not, hunting Atmosphere, +Painters and sculptors that ne'er paint nor sculp, +Reformers taking notes on Brainstorm Slum, +Cave Men in Windsor Ties, all gauche and glum, +With strong iron jaws that crush their food to Pulp, +And bright Boy Cynics playing paradox, +And th' inevitable She that knitteth Belgian socks -- +A score of little groups ! -- all bees that hum +About the futile blooms of Piffledom. + + III + +A wan Erotic Rotter told me that +The World could not be Saved except through Sin; +A she eugenist, sexless, flabby, fat, +With burst veins winding through unhealthy skin, +With loose, uncertain lips preached Purity; +A Preacher blasphemed just to show he dared; +A dame praised Unconventionality +In words her secretary had prepared; +A bare-legg'd painter garbed in Leopard hide +Quarreled with a Chinese lyre and scared the dogs; +A slithering Dancer slunk from side to side +In weird, ungodly, Oriental togs; +A pale, anemic, frail Divinity +Confided that she thought the great Blond Beast +Himself was Art's own true Affinity; +An Anarch gloomed; "The Mummy at the Feast +Gets all the pleasure from the festive board!" +I know not what they meant; I only wunk +Within myself, and praised the great god Bunk. +A Yogi sought the Silences and snored. + + IV + +But 'twas Hermione that Got the Hand! +Ah, yes, she talked! Of Purpose, and of Soul, +And how Life's parts are equal to its Whole. +And Thought -- and do the Masses Understand? +She lightly touched on Life and Love and Death, +And Cosmic Consciousness, and on Unrest, +Substance and Shadow, Solid Things and Breath, +The New Art movements her sweet voice caressed, +Philanthropy, Genetics, Social Duty, +The Mother-Teacher claimed a passing smile, +And she made clear we all must worship Beauty +And Concentrate on Things that are Worth While. +"Each night," she said, "each night ere I retire +Into the Depths I peer, and I inquire, +"Have I today some Worth-while Summit scaled? +Or have I failed to climb? Oh, have I failed? +These little talks between the Self and Soul -- +Oh, don't you think? -- still help us toward the Goal; +They help us shape the Universal Laws +In sweet accordance with our glorious Cause!" +"Hermione," said I, "they do! They do!" +"Thank you," said she, "I KNEW you'd understand!" +I said to her, the while I pressed her hand, +"All, all, my interest I owe to you!" + +And then I left, and following my feet +Soon found that they had led me to the street. + + V + +And there I found a burly Garbage Man +Who through bleak winter nights from can to can +Goes on his ashy way, sans rest or pause, +Goes on his way, still faithful to his Cause. + +"Tell me," said I, "if now across the verge +Of night should come the kindly Cosmic Urge, +Strong-armed and virile, full of vim and help, +And offer you with thee here cans to help, +Would you accept the Cosmic Urge's aid, +Or would you rise up free and unafraid +And say, 'My restless Personality +Bids me return a negative to thee!'" + +"Old scout," says he, "I've never really brought +My intellects to bear on that there though! +I gets no help, I asks no help from none -- +But I have noticed, bo, that one by one, +And soon or late, and gradual, day by day, +Most things in life eventual comes my way! +Into the Ashes Can the whole world goes, +Old hats, old papers, toys and styles and clo'es, +Eventual they dump "em down the bay!" + + VI + +Symbolic Garbage Man! Sans rest or pause, +In steadfast faith work for thy Sacred Cause! +Some time, perhaps, all piles of twisted bunk, +All half-baked faddists, heaps of mental junk, +Unto the waiting Scow we'll cart away +Eventual to dump 'em down the bay! + + + + +THE PERFUME CONCERT + +THE Loveliest man gave us a talk the other +evening -- our Little Group of Serious +Thinkers, you know -- on the Art of the +Future. + +And what do you think it is to be? You'd never +guess! Never! + +The entertainment of the future will be a +Perfume concert! + +Every scent, if you get what I mean, corresponds +to some color, and ever color corresponds to some +sound, and every sound corresponds to some +emotion. + +And the truly esthetic person -- the one who is +Sensitized, if you get what I mean -- will hear a +tone on the violin, and see a color, and think +passionately of the One he Loves, all at the same +time, just through smelling a Rose. + +Only, of course, it must be the RIGHT KIND of a rose. + +Papa -- poor der Papa is so coarse and crude +sometimes in his attempts to be witty -- Papa says it +would be a fine idea to lead the man who talked to +us into a boiled cabbage foundry and then watch +him die of the noise. Papa is not Sensitized; he +doesn't understand that the esthete really WOULD die -- +Papa resists the vibrations of the esthetic environment +with which I have striven to surround him, +if you get what I mean. + +Oh, to be Sensitized! To be Sensitized! To vibrate +like a reed in the wind! To thrill like a petal +in the sun! + +I'm having a study of my aura made. You +know, one's soul gives off certain colors, and if +one's individuality is to be in tune with the Cosmic +All, one must take care that the colors about out +do not jar with one's own Psychic Hue. + +And after one has found one's soul color, one can +find the scent to match that color, if you get what I +mean. + +I am going to have the house re-decorated, with +a sweet subtle blending of perfumes in every room! + +I have always been good at matching things, +anyhow -- I perceive affinities at a glance. Psychic +people do. + +When I was quite a small child Mamma always +used to take me with her to the shops if there were +ribbons or anything like that to be matched. + +I just loved it, even as a baby! And I think +it is the greatest fun yet. + +Often I go through half a dozen shops, not because +I want to buy anything, but just to match colors, +you know. It gives me a thrill that nothing else does. + +Some of us are like that -- some of us truly Sensitized +Souls -- we function, I mean, quite without +being able to stop it -- I hope you follow me. Isn't +it wonderful to be in touch with the Universe in +that way! Not, of course, that the shop girls who +show you the fabrics and things are always understanding. + +The working classes are so often ungrateful to +us advanced thinkers. Sometimes I am almost provoked +to the point of giving up my Social Betterment work +when I think HOW ungrateful they are. +But some of us, in every age, must suffer at the +hands of the masses for the sake of the masses, if +you know what I mean. + + + + +ON BEING OTHER-WORLDLY + +IT is not enough to be merely unworldly. + +One must be OTHER-WORLDLY as well, if you +get what I mean. + +For what does all Modern Thought amount +to if it does not minister to the Beautiful and the +Spiritual? + +Isn't Materialism simply FRIGHTFUL? + +For the undisciplined mind, I mean. Of course, +the right sort of mind will get good even out of +Materialism, and the wrong sort will get harm out +of it. + +Every time before I take up anything new I ask +myself, "Is it OTHER-worldly? Or is it not OTHER-Worldly?'' + +We were going to take up Malthusianism and +Mendelism -- our Little Group of Serious Thinkers, +you know -- and give a whole evening to them, but +one of the girls said, "Oh let's NOT take them up. +They sound frightfully chemical, somehow!" + +I said, "The question, my dear, is not whether +they are chemical or un-chemical. The question is, +Are they worldly? Or are they OTHER-Worldly?" + +That is the Touchstone. One can apply it to +everything, simply EVERYTHING!" + +Should teachers be mothers, for instance -- that +question came up for discussion the other evening. +And I settled the whole matter at once, with one +question: "Is it worldly? Or is it OTHER-worldly +for Teachers to be Mothers? Or is it merely Un-Worldly?" + +Have you seen the latest models? Some of them +are wonderful, simply WONDERFUL! You know I +always dress to my temperament -- and I'm having +the loveliest gown made -- the skirt is ecru lace, you +know; a double tiered effect, falling from a straight +bodice, and the color scheme is silver and blue. + + + + +PARENTS AND THEIR INFLUENCE + +MAMA is unadvanced enough, goodness +knows. + +But poor, dear Papa! + +"Papa," I said to him the other day, " all conservatives +worth listening to were radicals in their +youth." The loveliest man told us that the other +night -- our Little Group of Serious Thinkers, you +know -- and it struck me as being profound. + +And isn't profundity fascinating? + +But Papa only glowered and said, "Umph!" + +Papa, you know, is an obstructionist. + +"Papa," I said to him, "what is stubbornness in +you has become will power in me. You will never +dominate me -- NEVER! You should study heredity; +it's wonderful, simply WONDERFUL! + +Papa scowled and said, "Umph!" + +But you know, Parents are Doomed. + +Our little group listened to a talk the other evening +about Parents. Mothers, particularly. + +"The menace of the Mother," it was called. I +always make note of titles. + +This man said -- he was a regular savant -- I wish +you could have heard him -- my, if I weren't such +an advanced thinker, I would be a savant ---- + +Anyhow, he said, this savant, that Mothers held +back Civilization through Selfishness -- they teach +the Child, you know, that is -- er, well, you know, +they lose sight of Ulterior Ethics and Race Morality +while inculcating Individual Self-Improvement. + +It's frightful to think about, isn't it? Simply FRIGHTFUL! + +Then and there I resolved that if I were ever a Mother +I would turn over the up-bringing of my children to experts +and savants and specialists like that. + +"Papa," I said, "you allowed poor, dear Mamma +to make me selfish -- you know you did! What +have you to say for yourself? What right had you +to make me a Self-Indulgent Individualist? + +And, you know, I have struggled and struggled +to get rid of the selfishness my parents trained into +me. How I strive for Harmony and Humility! +Nearly every night before I go to bed I say to my- +self: "Have I been HUMBLE today? Truly humble? +Or have I FAILED?" + +Children are not nearly SIMPLE enough these days. + +Oh, for more Simplicity! That is what we all need. + +Though I will say this for Mamma -- that it +would have been hard to train Simplicity into me +even if she had known how. + +I had such a high-strung, sensitive, nervous organism +as a child, you know. + +At a very early age my temperament began to show. + +And one CANNOT hide one's temperament. + +Especially if one is at all psychic, and I am, VERY. + +But if I ever have Children -- well, I will take no +chances with them. + +To begin with, I will Select their Father. + +Mamma said, when I told her that: "Hermione, +you are HORRID!" + +Poor dear Mamma! She's SO stupid! "Mamma," +I said to her, of course I DON'T mean free love. +I'm not that advanced, I hope! Though some VERY +Nice People have written of it -- it's quite respectable, +as a theory. But you're hopelessly old-fashioned. +I WILL select the parent of my Off-spring; +YOU were selected." + +Mamma only groaned and said: "Anything but +a Cave-man, Hermione." + +But I am not sure. It comes back to me again +and again how Primitive I am in some ways. + +And to wander barefoot in the dew! + +Not really quite barefoot, of course -- but with +some of the new sandals on. + + + + +FOTHERGIL FINCH TELLS OF HIS REVOLT +AGAINST ORGANIZED SOCIETY + +BERTIE GRIGGS -- you know Ethelbert +Griggs, don't you? He does the text for +the Paris fashions for a woman's magazine, +and on the side he writes the most impassioned +verse. All about Serpents and Woman, and Lillith +and Phryne, you know. + +Bertie said to me only the other day, "Fothy, you +are too Radical. It will keep you down in the +world." + +"Bertie," I said, "I know I am, but can I help +it? I spurn the world! A truly virile poet must." + +"Some day, Fothy," he said, "you will come into +contact with the law." + +I only laughed. Bitterly, I suppose, for Bertie +looked at me quite shocked. + +"Bertie," I said, "I expect persecution. I welcome +it. All great souls do. I look for it. On +one pretext or another, I will be flung into prison +when my next volume, "Clamor, Cries and Curses' +comes out." + +And I will, too, if I ever find a publisher who +dares to bring it out. But they are all too cowardly! + +"Fothy," he said, "you Revolutionists are always +talking -- but what do you ever do? + +I arose with dignity. "Bertie," I said, "I am +ready to suffer for the Cause." I turned and left +him. I must have been pale with resolve, for he +ran after me and caught me by the wrist. But I +shook him off. + +I was in a desperate mood. + +"Curses upon all their Conventions!" I said, as I +turned up the street toward Central Park. "Curses +upon all organized society!" + +I stopped in front of Columbus's statue, at +Columbus Circle. + +"Fool," I muttered bitterly, "to discover a new +world" + +I shook my fist at the statue and went on. + +I wandered over to the place where they keep +the animals, and stopped in front of one of the +monkey cages. + +Dear, unconventional little beasts! They always +charm my blacker moods away from me! So free, +so untrammeled, so primitive! + +I smiled at a monkey. He smiled at me. I held +up a peanut. He reached out his hand for it. + +I was about to fling it to him when I saw a sign +that read: + +"Visitors are warned not to feed the animals +under the penalty of the law." + +Always their laws! Always their restrictions! +Always their damnable shackles! Always this +denial of the rights of the individual! + +For a moment I stood there with the peanut in +my hand just simply too angry for anything! + +And then I cried out, quite loudly: "Curses upon +organized society! I will break its laws! I will +feed the animals!" + +Always in times of great crisis I see myself quite +plainly as if I were some other person; poets often +do, you know; and I could not help thinking of the +pose of Ajax defying the lightning. + +"I WILL break the law!" I cried. "So there!" + +And with that I flung the peanut right into the +cage with all my might, and ran away, laughing +mockingly as I ran. + +I felt that I had crossed the Rubicon, and that +night I sat down and wrote my revolutionary poem, +"The Defiance." + +What the Cause needs is men with Vision to see +and Courage to perform! This is the age of Virility! + + + + +THE EXOTIC AND THE UNEMPLOYED + +WE'VE been taking up the Exotic this week +in poetry and painting, you know, and +all that sort of thing -- and its influence +on our civilization. + +Really, it's wonderful -- simply WONDERFUL! Quite +different from the Erotic, you know, and from the +Esoteric, too -- though they'll all mixed up with it +sometimes. + +Odd, isn't it, how all these new movements seem +to be connected with one another? + +One of the chief differences between the Exotic in +art and other things -- such as the Esoteric, for +instance -- is that nearly everything Exotic seems to +have crept into our art from abroad. + +Don't you think some of those foreign ideas are +apt to be -- well, dangerous? That is, to the +untrained mind? + +You can carry them too far, you know -- and if +you do they work into your subconsciousness. + +One of the girls -- she belongs to the same Little +Group of Advanced Thinkers that I do -- has been so +taken with the Exotic that she wears orchids all the +time and just simply CRAVES Chinese food. "My +love," she said to me only yesterday, "I feel that I +must have chop suey or I'll DIE! The Exotic has +worked into her subliminal being, you know. + +She has an intense and passionate nature, and +I'm sure I don't know what would become of her +if it were not for the spiritual discipline she gets +out of modern thought. + +Next week we're taking up Syndicalism -- it's +frightfully interesting, they say, and awfully +advanced. + +I suppose it's a new kind of philosophy or socialism, +or maybe anarchy -- or something like that. +[Most of these new things that come along nowadays +ARE something like that, aren't they. + +I'm sure the world owes a debt to its advanced +thinking which it can never repay for always +keeping abreast of topics like that. + +Not that I've lost my interest in any of the older +forms of sociology, you know, just because I am +keeping up with the newer phases of it. + +Only yesterday I rode about town in the car and +had the chauffeur stop a while every place where +they were shoveling snow. + +The nicest man was with me -- he is connected +with a settlement, and has given his life to sociology +and all that sort of thing. + +"Just think," I said to him, "how much real practical +sociology we have right here before us -- all +these men shoveling snow -- and how little they realize, +most of them, that their work is taking them +into sociology at all." + +He didn't say anything, but he seemed impressed. + +And I'm not sure the unemployed should be grateful +to the serious thinkers for the careful study we +give them. Don't you think so? + + + + +SOULS AND TOES + +I went to a Soul Fight at Hermione's + +And nothing normal can describe it . . . + +It was beyond rhyme, reason, rum, rhubarb or rhythm . . . + +Therefore, Vers Libre Muse, help me! + +Imagist outcast with the bleary eyes, + +My psychic Pup, my polyrhythmic hound, lift up + Your voice and help me howl! + +Tenth Muse, doggerel muse, slink hither, brute, + +And lick your master's hand . . . I've need of + Thee . . . + +Come catercornered on three legs with doubtful tail + And eager eyes . . . + +Tomorrow I may bash you in the ribald ribs again + +And publicly disown you; + +But oh! Today I've need of thee . . . + +Winged mongrel, mutt divine, come here and help + Me bay the piebald moon! + + + +It was a Soul Fight at Hermione's . . . + +A fat Terpsichore with polished toes . . . a barefoot she Soul + +With ten Achaian toes . . . and each toe had a separate soul, she said . . . + +Was there . . . not only there, but IT. + +She sat upon a couch and lectured . . . not with words, + +But with her toes, her eloquent, her temperamental toes . . . + +Her topes that had trod (so she said) the paths of beauty + +Since Hector was a pup at Troy . . . + +She sat upon a couch . . . bards, swamis and Hermione, + +Gilt souls and purple, melomaniacs, yellow souls + And blue, + +Souse socialists and other cognac-scented cognoscenti, + +Post-cubist chicles that would ne'er jell into gum . . . + +All, all the little groups from all the brainstorm Slums . . . + +Why specify? . . . we know our little groups! + . . . where there . . . + +Were there to worship at those feet . . . to vibrate + and change color with the moods of those unusual feet. . . . + +"This toe," she said, "is Beauty . . . this is Art . . . + +This toe is Italy, and this is Greece." . . . + +A poet, quite beside himself with inspiration, + +Suddenly arose and cried: + "This little pig went to market, + This little pig stayed home + This little pig was Greece, + This little pig was Rome!" + +But they chilled him . . . he went Into the Silences . . . + +And Terpischore resumed: + +"My ten toes are: Beauty, Art, Italy, Greece, + Life, Music, Psyche, Color, Motion, Liberty! +Put yourself into a receptive attitude now, and + Beauty will speak to you!" +And while a satellite ran rosy fingers down a lute, + she moved the toe named Beauty to and fro . . . + +A hush fell on the assembled nuts, as Beauty moved . . . +As Beauty spoke to them . . . +"I see," murmured Hermione to Fothergil Finch, + "I see, +As that toe moves . . . the Isles of Greece . . . + And Aphrodite rising +From the Acropolis." . . . "You mean," said Fothergil, "from the Aegean!" +"It is all one," said Hermione, "the point is that + I see her rising!" + +Then Color spoke to them . . . +"As that toe moves," said Ravenswood Wimble, "I + see the heavens +Turned into one vast Kaleidoscope . . . all the stars + and moons +Dance through my soul like flakes of colored glass!" +Then waved the toe called Life, and as with one + accord each of the company +Leapt gasping to his or her feet, as the case might be, +And cried: "I feel! I feel! I feel! I feel the Cosmic Urge!" + +Then moved the toe called Italy, +And Fothergil Finch remarked: "Roses . . . + roses . . . roses . . . +Onions and roses . . . roses are onions, and onions pigs . . . +And pigs are beautiful" . . . +And then the serious thinkers cried as one: +"Ah! Pigs are Beautiful!" +"Ah, Italy; oh, Italy!" cried Fothy Finch, +"Oh, never cease to move . . . Italy . . . +garlic . . . Venice . . . +Oh, bind my brows with garlic, lovely land, and + turn me loose!" +And as the toe called Italy still moved +The little groups made it into a chant, and sang: +"Oh, bind my brows with garlic, love, and turn me loose!" + + * * * + +"Hermione," I asked her afterward, +"Did you really see and feel anything when those + educated toes wiggled?" +"How can you ask?" she said, very up-stagey. +"Hermione," I said, "we are old enough friends by + this time, so we can deal frankly with one + another. Tell me on the square . . . did you + get it?" +"You are blaspheming at the shrink of Art!" she said. +"Hermione! You are dodging!" +"Did you notice," she said irrelevantly, "the nail + polish she was using? +"It's QUITE the latest thing! For finger nails, too, + you know. That delicate rose pink, with just + the touch of creaminess in it! It's the creamy + tint that's new, you know. Isn't it simply + wonderful?" + + + + +KULTUR, AND THINGS + +Do you know, Kultur isn't the same thing at +all as culture . . . FANCY! + +When we took it up -- Kultur, I mean yes, -- +we took it up in quite a serious way the other +evening -- our Little Group of Serious Thinkers, you +know -- and threshed it out thoroughly -- we hadn't +the slightest idea that it would lead us straight to +Nietzsche and -- and, well, all those people like that, +if you get what I mean. Though, of course, as the +man who spoke to us -- he was the LOVELIEST person! + -- spoke in German, we may have missed some of +the finer shades. + +Oh, yes, I had German in high school . . . really, +I was quite proficient . . . although, of course, +it's such a GUTTURAL kind of language -- don't you +think? -- that one wonders how they EVER sing it. +And then, the verbs! . . . but I had Latin verbs +about the same time, you know . . . and really, +isn't it surprising how some of those foreign languages +seem to RUN to verbs, if you get what I mean? + +It seems it was the Germans who invented the +Superman . . . and I suppose we must be grateful +to them for that, no matter what they may have +done with him after they invented him. . . . + +I used to be quite taken with the Superman, you +know. . . . Really, I didn't recognize how +dangerous he might become. . . . + +I didn't know he was German at all when we +took him up. . . . + +Have you read anything about the Blond Beast? + +I felt rather attracted toward him for a long +time myself . . . until lately. . . . But the attraction +passed. . . . I'm not brunette, you know, at +all. . . . Likely that's why I lost interest in +him. . . . + +Aren't affinities between people of different +complexion simply WONDERFUL! + +It makes me wonder if the Eugenists can be right +after all! + +Fothergil Finch says that's where the Eugenists +fall down. . . . He says they don't take account +of Affinities at all. + +Sometimes one finds it very puzzling -- doesn't +one? -- the way these modern causes and movements +seem to contradict one another! + +But if one is in tune with the Cosmic All these +little inconsistencies don't matter. + +The Cosmic All! . . . WHAT would we do without it? + +How do you suppose people ever got along a +generation or two ago before the Cosmos and all +that sort of thing was discovered? + +I've often thought about it . . . and of what life +must have been like in those days! As Emerson +. . . or WAS it Emerson? . . . says in one of his +poems: "Better a year of Europe than a cycle of +Cathay!" + +That's what Fothy Finch says he always feels +about Brooklyn . . . though I WILL say this for +Brooklyn -- the first girl I saw with courage enough +to wear one of those ankle watches on the street +lived in Brooklyn. + +But don't you think Brooklyn people are rather +LIKE that . . . go to the latest things in dress, you +know, in an EXTREME sort of way, so that people +won't suspect they live in Brooklyn? + + + + +THE SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS + +ISN'T the Christmas festival just simply WONDERFUL? + +For days beforehand I feel so uplifted -- so +well, OTHER-WORLDLY -- if you know what I mean. + +Isn't it just dreadful that any MATERIAL +considerations have to spoil such a sacred time? + +It does seem to me that somehow we might free +ourselves of WORLDLINESS and GREEDINESS and just +rise to the spiritual significance of the day. If only +we could! + +And what a blessing it would be to the poor, tired +shop girls if we could! + +Though, of course, they, the shop girls, I mean, +must be upheld even in their weariest moments by +the thought that they are helping on the beautiful +impulse of giving! + +When they reflect that every article they sell is +to be a gift from one thoughtful and loving heart +to another they must forget the mere fatigue of the +flesh and just feel the stimulus, the inspiration, the +vibration! + +There are gifts, I admit, that haven't the divine +spark of love to hallow them, but after all there +aren't so many of that sort. Love one another is +the spirit of Christmas -- and it prevails, whatever +the skeptics say to the contrary. And though +it's a pity there has to be a MATERIAL side to +Christmas at all, it's so comforting, so ennobling +to realize that back of the material gifts is Brotherly +Love. + +It quite reassures one about the state of the world; +it certainly isn't getting worse with Brotherly Love +and the Spirit of Giving animating everybody. + +Of course, Christmas giving IS a problem sometimes. +It is SO embarrassing when somebody you'd +forgotten entirely sends you a present. + +I always buy several extra things just for that +emergency. Then, when an unexpected gift arrives, +I can rush off a return gift so promptly that +nobody'd ever DREAM I hadn't meant to send it all +along. + +And I always buy things I'd like to have myself, +so that if they aren't needed for unexpected people +they're still not wasted. + +With all my spirituality, I have a practical side, +you see. + +All well BALANCED natures have both the spiritual +and the practical side. It's so essential, nowadays, +to be well balanced, and it's a great relief to me to +find I CAN be practical. It saves me a lot of trouble, +too, especially about this problem of Christmas giving. + +I know the value of material things, for instance. +And I never waste money giving more expensive +presents to my friends than I receive from them. +That's one of the advantages of having a well +balanced nature, a PRACTICAL side. + +And, anyway, the value of a gift is not in the +COST of it. Quite cheap things, when they represent +true thought and affection, are above rubies. + +Mamma and Papa are going to get me a pearl +necklace, just to circle the throat, but beautifully +matched pearl. I wouldn't care for an +ostentatiously long string of pearls anyway. + +Poor, dear Papa says he really can't afford it -- +with times so hard, and those dear, pathetic +Europeans on everybody's hands, you know -- but +Mamma made him understand how necessary BEAUTY is +to me, and he finally gave in. + +Isn't it just WONDERFUL how love rules us all at +Christmas time? + + + + + +POOR DEAR MAMA AND FOTHERGIL FINCH + (Hermione's Boswell Loquitur) + +HERMIONE'S mother, who has figured so +often as "Poor dear Mama" in these +pages, has come out definitely for Suffrage. + +Someone told her that there was an alliance between +the liquor interests and the anti-Suffagists and she +believed it, and it shocked her. + +Since the activities of her daughter have brought +her into contact with Modern Though her life has +been chiefly passed in one or another of three +phases: She has been shocked, she is being +shocked, or she fears that she is about to be shocked. + +She is nearing fifty and rather stout, though her +figure is still not bad. She has an abundance of +chestnut hair, all her own, and naturally wave; her +hands are pretty, her feet are pretty, her face is pretty. +Her mouth is very small, almost disproportionately so, +and her eyes are very large and blue and very wide +open. She was intended for a placed +woman, but Hermione and Modern Thought +have made complete placidity impossible. She has +a fondness for rich brocades and pretty fans are +chocolate candy and big bowls of roses and comfortable +chairs. When she was Hermione's age +she used to do water color sketches; the outlines +were penciled in by her drawing teacher, and she +washed on the color very smoothly and neatly; but +she heard a great many stories concerning the +dissolute lives that artists lead and she gave it up. +Nevertheless, she sometimes says: "Hermione +comes by her interest in Art quite naturally." + +Fothergil Finch and I called recently. Hermione +was not in, and her mother suggested that we wait +for her. Hermione's mother looks upon all of +Hermione's friends with more or less suspicion, +and she would not permit Fothergil in particular to +be about the place for a moment if she were not +obliged to; but she does not have the requisite stern- +ness of character to resist her daughter. Fothergil, +knowing that he is not approved of, scarcely does +himself justice when Hermione's mother is present; +although he endeavors to avoid offending her. + +"Have you seen the play, 'Young America'?" +asked Fothergil, searching for a safe topic of +conversation. + +A little ripple of alarm immediately ruffled the +lakeblue innocence of her eyes. + +"If it is a Problem Play, I have not," she said, +"I consider such things dangerous." + +"But it isn't, you know," said Fothergil eagerly. +It's a -- a -- it's a perfectly NICE play. +It's about a dog!" + +"About a dog!" Her eyebrows went up, and her +mouth rounded itself with the conviction that no +perfectly nice play could possibly be about a dog. +"I think that is dreadfully Coarse!" she said. + +"But it isn't," protested Fothergil. "It's just the +SORT of thing you'd like." + +"Indeed!" She felt slightly insulted at his assumption +of what she would like, and dismissed +the subject with a wave of her pretty hand. Fothergil +tried again. + +"I hope," he said ingratiatingly, "that you haven't +been bothered by mosquitoes." She looked +a bit frightened, but said nothing, and he dashed on +determinedly. "You know, this is a new variety +of mosquitoes we've been having this year. Most +of them have stripes on their legs, you know, but +these have black legs this year. But maybe you +haven't noticed -- -- " + +He stopped in midcareer. The preposterous idea +that she could be interested in examining the legs +of mosquitoes had too evidently outraged Hermione's +mother. Fothergil, flushed and embarrassed, tried +to make it better and made it worse. + +"Maybe you haven't noticed their -- er -- limbs," +said Fothergil. + +"I have not," she murmured. + +Fothergil desperately persevered. + +"We don't see so much as we used to of -- +of -- -- " (I am sure he didn't know he was +going to finish the sentence when he began it, but +he plunged ahead) -- "of the Queen Anne style of +architecture." + +With visible relief, and yet with a lurking suspicion, +she assented. And Fothergil, feeling himself +on safe ground at last, went on: + +"Don't you think she was one of the most interesting +queens in English history -- Queen Anne? +Do you remember the anecdote -- -- ? + +But she checked him, frightened again: + +"I do not wish to hear it, Mr. Finch," she said. + +"But," said Fothergil, "She was a most unexceptional +Queen -- not like, er -- not like -- well, +Cleopatra, you know, or any of those bad ones." + +Hermione's mother was silent, but it was apparent +that she feared the talk was about to veer toward +Cleopatra. + +"When I was a girl," she said, "the lives of +queens were considered rather dangerous reading +for young women. You need not go into details, +please." + +I couldn't stand it any more myself. "If you'll +just tell Hermione I called," I said, edging toward +the door. Fothergil, however, stuck it out. In the +frenzy of embarrassment he must have lost his +head completely. For as I left I heard him be- +ginning: + +"Did you read the story in the papers today of +the man who killed his wife? Crimes of passion are +becoming more and more frequent. . . ." + + + + +PRISON REFORM AND POISE + +AREN'T you just crazy about prison reform? + +The most wonderful man talked to us -- to +our Little Group of Advanced Thinkers, you +know -- about it the other evening. + +It made me feel that I'd be willing to do anything, +simply ANYTHING! -- to help those poor, unfortunate +convicts. Collect money, you know, or give talks, +or read books about them, or make any other +sacrifice. + +Even get them jobs. One ought to help them to +start over again, you know. + +Though as for hiring one of them myself, or +rather getting Papa to -- well, really, you know, +one must draw the line somewhere! + +But it's a perfectly fascinating subject to take up, +prison reform is. + +It gives one such a sense of brotherhood -- and of +service -- it's so broadening, don't you think? -- +taking up things like that? + +And one must be broad. I ask myself every night +before I go to bed: "Have I been BROAD today? +Or have I failed?" + +Though, of course, one can be TOO broad, don't you think? + +What I mean is, one must not be so broad that +one loses one's poise in the midst of things. + +Poise! That is what this age needs! + +I suppose you've heard wide-brimmed hats are +coming in again? + + + + +AN EXAMPLE OF PSYCHIC POWER + +HAVE you thought deeply concerning the +Persistence of Personal Identity? + +We took it up the other evening -- our +little group, you know -- in quite a thorough way -- +devoted an entire evening to it. + +You see, there's a theory that after Evolution has +evolved just as far as it possibly can, everything +will go to smash, but then Evolution will start all +over again. And everything that has happened be- +fore will happen again. + +Only the question is whether the people to whom +it is happening again will know whether they +are the same people to whom it has happened +before. + +That's where the question of Persistence of +Personal Identity comes in. FRIGHTFULLY +fascinating, isn't it? + +For my part I'd just as soon not be reincarnated +as to be reincarnated and not know anything about +it, wouldn't you? + +Of course, one's Subliminal Consciousness might +know about it, and give one intimations. + +I've had intimations like that myself -- really! + +I'm dreadfully psychic, you know. + +Sometimes I quite startle people with my psychic +power. + +Fothergil Finch was here the other evening -- +you know fothergil Finch, the poet, don't you? -- +and I astounded him utterly by reading his inmost +thoughts. + +He had just finished reading one of his poems -- +a vers libre poem, you know; all about Strength and +Virility, and that sort of thing. Fothergil is just +simply fascinated by Strength and Virility, though +you never would think it to look at him -- he is so -- +so -- well, if you get what I mean you'd think to +look at him that he'd be writing about violets instead +of cave men. + +"Fothy," I said, when he had finished reading +the poem, "I know what you are thinking -- what +you are feeling!" + +"What?" he said. + +"You're thinking," I said, 'how WONDERFUL a +thing is the Cosmic Urge!" + +Thoughts come to me just like that -- leap to me -- +right out of nowhere, so to speak. + +Fothy was staggered; he actually turned pale; +for a minute or two he could scarcely speak. There +had been scarcely a WORD about Cosmic Urge in +the poem, you know; he'd hardly mentioned it. + +"It is wonderful," he said, when we got over the +shock; "wonderful to be understood!" And you +know, really -- poor dear! -- so many people don't +understand Fothy at all. Nor what he writes, +either. + +But the strangest thing was -- I wish I could make +you understand how positively EERIE it makes me +feel -- that just the instant before he said, "It is +wonderful to be understood!" I knew he was going +to say it. I got that psychically, too! + +"Fothy," I said, "It is absolutely WEIRD -- I +eavesdropped on your brain the second time!" + +"Wonderful!" he said, "but the still more +wonderful thing would be -- -- " + +And before he could finish the sentence it happened +the THIRD time! I interrupted and finished it +for him. + +"The still more wonderful thing would be," I said, +"if it were NOT so." + +"Heavens!" he cried, "this is getting positively ghostly." + +And you know, it almost was. Not that I'm superstitious +at all, you know, in the vulgar way. But in the dim +room -- I always have just candlelight in +the drawing-room -- it fits in with my more reflective +moods, somehow -- I believe one must suit one's +environment to one's mood, don't you? -- in the dim +room, all those thoughts flying back and forty between +my brain and his gave me a positively creepy +feeling. And Fothy was so shaken I had to give +him a drink of Papa's Scotch before he went out +into the night. + + + + +SOME BEAUTIFUL THOUGHTS + +(Fothergil Finch, the Vers Libre Bard) + + +OH, the Beautiful Mud! I always leave it on +my boots. It is sacred to me. Because in +it are the souls of lilies! + +The Hog should be a sacred beast. Hogs are +Beautiful! They are close to the Mire! Oh, to be +a Swine! + +What is more eloquent than a Sneeze? The +Sneeze is the protest of the Free Spirit against the +Smug Citizen who never exposes himself to a cold. +Oh, Beautiful Sneezes! Oh, to make my life one +loud explosive Sneeze in the face of Conventionality! + +What is so free, so untrammeled, so ungyved, so +unconventional, as an Influenza Germ? From +throat to throat it floats, full of the spirit of true +democratic brotherhood, making the masses equal +with the classes, careless, winged ungyved! Oh, +the Beautiful Germ! Oh, to be an Influenza Germ! + +What is so naive as a Hiccough! Oh, to be ingenuous, +unspoiled, beautiful, barbaric! Oh, the +hiccoughs, the beautiful hiccoughs, the hiccoughs +of Art uttered against the hurricane of time. + +Bugs are Beautiful! Oh, the beautiful, sleek +slithery bugs. Oh, to be a water-bug of poesy skipping +across the flood of oblivion! Oh, to be a Bug! + +I went down to the waterfront where they sell +fish and there I saw a fisherman who had caught a +Dogfish, and he cursed, but I said to him, "Do not +curse the Dogfish! The Dogfish is Symbolical! The +Dogfish is beautiful! Beautiful!" + +Oh, the lovely Garbage Scows! I went down the +bay, and there I saw them dump the Garbage Scows! +I said to the man who sailed my boat: "What does +the Garbage Scow MEAN to you?" He was a +Philistine; he was Bourgeois; he was Smug; he was +Conventional, and he said: "A Garbage Scow means a +Garbage Scow to me!" But I said to him: "You +are Academic; you are Conservative! Garbage +Scows are lovely Symbols! Oh, my Argosies of +Dream! Oh, my beautiful Garbage Scows! Some +day even the Philistines of Benighted America will +see the Spiritual Significance of the Lovely Garbage +Scow!" + +I found a Glue Factory, a Free Untrammeled +Glue Factory! I was expressing itself. It was +asserting its individuality. It was saying to the +Blind Complacent Pillars of Polite Society: "My +aroma is not your aroma, but my aroma is my +own!" Oh, the Courageous Glue Factory, the Free, +Unfettered Glue Factory! A thousand Glue Factories, +from Main to Oregon, are thus rebuking Class +Prejudice and Bourgeois Smugness. Like +Poets, like Prophets of the New Art, they stand, +Glue Factory after Glue Factory, expressing their +Egos, Being Themselves, undaunted, unshackled, +strong, independent, virile! Oh, to be the Poet of +the Super Glue Factory! + +With violets in my hands I wandered to the +wilds, and there I met a Buzzard. He was Being +Himself! I wove a wreath of the violets and I +crowned the Buzzard, and the Buzzard said, "Why +do you crown me?" And I said, "Oh, Lovely Buzzard, +are you not Being Yourself? Are you not +rebuking the Trivial Conventionalities of our Organized +Society? I know your Dream, O Buzzard! +Accept this Crown of Violets from our little +group!" + +Come with me to the zoo, and I will bare our +Souls to the Hyena, and the Hyena will commune +with us, and we will know the meaning of Life! +Oh, the lovely Hyena. + + + + +THE BOURGEOIS ELEMENT AND BACKGROUND + +ISN'T it simply wonderful about D'Annunzio +enlisting as a common soldier and digging +trenches along with the Due D'Abruzzi and +those other Italian poets? Or was it D'Abruzzi? +Anyhow, it was one of those poets that were +always talking about the Superman. + +Although, I must say, one doesn't hear so much +about the Superman these days, does one? The +Superman is going out, you know. + +One of my friends -- she's quite an advanced +thinker, too, and belongs to our little group -- told +me a year or so ago, "Hermione, I will NEVER marry +until I find a Superman!" + +"Of course, that is all right, my dear," I said +to her, "but how about Genetics?" + +Because, you know, the slogan of our little group + -- that is, one of the slogans -- is "Genetics or +Spinsterhood!" + +It made her quite angry for some reason. She +pursed her lips up and acted shocked. + +"It is all very well, Hermione," she said, "to +discuss Genetics in the ABSTRACT. But to connect the +discussion with the marriage of a FRIEND is not, to +my mind, the proper thing at all!" + +Did you ever hear of anything more utterly in- +consistent? + +Oh, Consistency! Consistency! Isn't Consist- +ency perfectly wonderful! + +But that is always the way when it comes to +a discussion of Sex. The Bourgeois Element are +NEVER Fundamental and Thorough in their +treatment of Sex, if you know what I mean. + +And, as Fothergil Finch says, in this country we +are NEARLY all Bourgeois. + +We have not had enough Background for one thing. + +If all the little groups the country over would +take up the matter of Background in a serious way, +something might be done about it, don't you think? + +We must organize -- we who are the intellectual +leaders, you know -- and start an effective propaganda +for the purpose of obtaining more Background. + + + + + +TAKING UP THE LIQUOR PROBLEM + +WE'RE thinking of taking up the Liquor +problem -- our little group, you know, -- +in quite a serious way. + +The Working Classes would be so much better +off without liquor. And we who are the leaders +in thought should set them an example. + +So a number of us have decided to set our faces +very sternly against drinking in public. + +Of course, a cocktail or two and an occasional +stinger, is something no one can well avoid taking, +if one is dining out or having supper after the +theater with one's own particular crowd. + +But all the members of my own particular little +group have entered into a solemn agreement not +to take even so much as a cocktail or a glass of +wine if any of the working classes happen to be +about where they can see us and become corrupted +by our example. + +The Best People owe those sacrifices to the +Masses, don't you think? + +Of course, the waiters, and people like that, +really belong to the working classes too, I suppose. + +But, as Fothergil Finch says, very often one +wouldn't know it. And who could expect a waiter +to be influenced one way or another by anything? +And it's the home life of the working classes that +counts, anyhow. + +When we took up Sociology -- we gave several +evenings to Sociological Discussion, you know, +besides doing a lot of practical Welfare Work -- it +was impressed upon me very strongly that if one is to +do anything at all for the Masses one must first +SWEETEN their Home Life. + +Though Papa made me stop poking around into +the horrid places where they live for fear I might +catch some dreadful disease. + +And the people we visited weren't all that grateful. +So VERY OFTEN the Masses are not. + +One dreadful woman, you know, claimed that +she couldn't keep her rooms -- she had two rooms, +and she cooked and washed and slept and sewed +in them and there were five in the family -- claimed +that she couldn't keep her rooms in any better shape +because they were so out of repair and the plumbing +was bad and the windows leaked and all that +sort of thing, you know, and one of the rooms was +ENTIRELY dark. + +I preached the doctrine of fresh air and sunshine +and cleanliness to her, you know, and the imprudent +thing told me Papa owned the building and +it wasn't true at all -- Papa only belonged to the +company that owned the building. One can't do +much for people who will not be truthful with one, +can one? + +Besides, it is the Silent Influence that counts more +than arguments and visiting. + +If one makes one's life what it should be Good +will Radiate. + +Vibrations from one's Ego will permeate all +classes of society. + +And that is the way we intend to make ourselves +felt with regard to the Liquor Problem. We will +inculcate abstemiousness by example. + +Abstemiousness, Fothy Finch says, should be our +motto, rather than Abstinence. We shall be QUITE +careful not to identify ourselves with the MORE +VULGAR aspects of the propaganda. + +And of course at social functions in our private +homes total abstinence is quite out of the question. + +The working classes wouldn't get any example +from our homes, anyone; for of course we never +come into contact with them there. + +But the working classes must be saved from +themselves, even if all the employers of labor have +to write out a list of just what they eat and +drink and make them buy only those things. They +simply MUST be saved. + +Not that they'll appreciate it. They never do. If +I were not an incorrigible idealist I would be +inclined to give them up. + +But someone must give up his life to leading them +onward and upward. And who is there to do it if +not we leaders of Modern Thought? + + + + +THE JAPANESE ARE WONDERFUL, +IF YOU GET WHAT I MEAN + +DON'T you just dote on the Japanese? + +They're so esoteric -- and subtle and all that +sort of thing, aren't they? + +Just look at Buddhism and Shintoism, for +instance. Could anything be more subtle and +esoteric? + +We've been taking them up -- our Little Group +of Serious Thinkers, you know -- and they've +wonderful, simply WONDERFUL! + +Not, of course, that one would BE a Buddhist or +a Shintoist -- but it's broadening to the mind, don't +you think, to come in contact with the great +thought of -- of -- well, really of people like Shinto, +you know, and those other sages? + +And how wonderfully artistic they are -- the +Japanese! + +The new parasols are quite Japanese, you know. +Haven't you seen them? + +I have three, for different costumes. One is +covered with embroidered Japanese crepe, and an- +other with martine silk. + +But the one, I think that express ME the most +accurately -- the one that represents my individuality, +REALLY -- is made with gold spokes covered with +black Chantilly lace. Japanese shape, you know, +and French workmanship. + +And one must strive to represent one's self if one +is to be honest. + +One must put one's soul into one's environment. + +Although Environment isn't what it used to be. +You don't hear Environment spoken of nearly as +often as you did. + +Environment is going out. + +But besides being so esoteric and exotic and artistic, +and all that sort of things, the Japanese are +wonderfully up to date, too. + +Do you know, they actually have a battleship +named The Tango! + +Have you thought deeply of Interstellar Communication? + +It promises to be one of the great new problems. + +The loveliest man talked to us about it the other +evening. "Interstellar Communication in Its Relation +to Recent Psychic Hypotheses" -- that's the title; +I wrote it down. I always take notes of a title like that. +It helps one to get to the heart of the matter. + +Interstellar Communication is wonderful -- simply WONDERFUL! + +We're going to take up Mars soon. + +Mamma said to me only yesterday: "Hermione, +you SIMPLY MUST drop some of your serious subjects +during the hot weather." + +"Mamma," I told her, "that was all very well in +your day -- to take things up and drop them at will. +But people didn't have a Social Conscience in those +times. We advanced thinkers owe a duty to the +race. We must grapple with things. We are not +content to frivol, I WILL take up Mars!" + +And, you know, I don't have the temperament to +remain idle. My mind MUST be active. Sometimes +when I think how active my mind is, I wonder my +forehead isn't wrinkled. + +And of course that would be a loss -- anything +is a loss that destroys Beauty. + +For, after all, Beauty is what the world needs +more than anything else. It's a serious thought -- +how far Use should be sacrificed to Beauty, and +Beauty to Use, isn't it? + +You know that's why I can't join the suffragists. +I am one, of course, but the suffragist yellow is +such a HORRID color I simply CANNOT wear it. + + + + +SHE REFUSES TO GIVE UP THE COSMOS + +WE'VE taken up Gertrude Stein -- our Little +Group of Serious Thinkers, you know -- +and she's wonderful; simply WONDERFUL. + +She Suggests the Inexpressible, you know. + +Of course, she is a Pioneer. And with all +Pioneers -- don't you think -- the Reach is greater +than the Grasp. + +Not that you can tell what she means. + +But in the New Art, one doesn't have to mean +things, does one? One strikes the chords, and the +chords vibrate. + +Aren't Vibrations just too perfectly lovely for +anything? + +The loveliest man talked to us the other night +about World Movements and Cosmic Vibrations. + +You see, every time the Cosmos vibrates it means +a new World Movement. + +And the Souls that are in Tune with the Cosmos +are benefitted by these World Movements. The +other souls will get harm out of them. + +Frightfully interesting, isn't it? -- the Cosmos, I mean. + +I have given so much thought to it! It has be- +come almost an obsession to me. + +Only the other evening I was thinking about it. +And without realizing that I spoke aloud I said, +"I simply could NOT DO WITHOUT the Cosmos!" + +Mamma -- poor Mamma! -- she is so terribly +unadvanced you know! -- Mama said: "Hermione, +I do not know what the Cosmos is. But this I +do know -- not another Sex Discussion or East +Indian Swami will ever come into THIS house!" + +"Mamma," I said to her, "I will NOT give up the +Cosmos. It means everything to me; simply EVERYTHING!" + +I am always firm with Mamma; it is kinder, in +the long run, to be quite positive. But what I +suffer at home from objections to the advanced +movements nobody knows! + +Nobody but the Leaders of Thought can dream +what Martyrdom is! + +Sacrifice! Sacrifice! That is the keynote of the +Liberal Life! + +Nearly every night before I go to bed I ask myself: +"Have I shown the Sacrificial Spirit to day? +Or have I FAILED?" + + + + +THE CAVE MAN + +DON'T you think the primitive is just simply +too fascinating for anything? We've all +got it in us, you know, and it seems like +nowadays the more cultured and advanced one is the +more likely the primitives is to break out on one. + +I have a strong strain of the primitive in me, you know. + +I wouldn't take anything for it -- it's simply +wonderful -- wonderful! + +It comes over me so strong at times, the yearning +for the primitive does, that I just sit with a dreamy +look on my face and murmur to myself: "ALONE, +ALONE -- UNDER THE STARS! ALONE!" + +Mamma overheard me saying that the other day +and thought I had gone crazy, and she said: "for +Heaven's sake, Hermione, what are you thinking +about, and what do you want?" + +"The stars," I murmured, scarcely knowing that +I spoke aloud, "the stars and my Cave Man!" + +Mamma was shocked -- she says for an unmarried +woman to think of Cave Men is simply indelicate. + +Mamma is not at all advanced, you know. + +She's dear and sweet, but she doesn't believe in +Trial Marriages at all. + +And I must admit they shocked me when I first +heard about them. But that was before I had taken +up these things seriously. + +"Mamma," I said to her, "it is no use for you to +pretend to be shocked. I have a right to happiness. +And happiness to me means being alone, under the +stars, and walking barefoot and bareheaded in the +dew." + +"Alone with a Cave Man!" she said. And then +she cried. + +Tears! -- that is so like the old-fashioned woman! + +"Mamma," I said, kindly, but firmly, "If it is my +destiny to be kidnaped by a Cave Man and taken +into the waste places, under the stars, can I avoid it?" + +She said I could at least be respectable, and that +I was acting like I WANTED to be kidnaped. + +And, you know, at times I do feel as if that +might be my fate, "really. I am so psychic, you +know, and psychics feel their fate coming on quicker +than most people. + +I told Mamma that I felt every woman had a +right to choose the father of her own children, and +she was shocked again. And then she wanted to +know what being kidnaped by a Cave Man had +to do with choosing the father of one's own children, +and how did I know but these Cave Men +kidnaped a different woman every year? + +But I settled her. + +"Mamma," I said, "you are NOT advanced, and +so I cannot argue with you. You wouldn't understand. +But if I AM primitive -- and I feel that +I am -- whose fault is it? Who did I inherit it from?" + +She couldn't say anything to that. She didn't +like to own that I inherited it from her. And she +knew if she blamed it onto Papa I would ask her +how she DARED to deny me a primitive man when +she had married one herself. + +Finally she quit crying and said, pressing her +lips together: "Hermione, do you KNOW any of +those Cave Men?" + +But I refused to answer. I went to my room. + +Dissension disturb's the soul's harmony. + +One's subliminal consciousness must ever vibrate +in harmony with the Cosmic All. + +I never fuss when a person disturbs me. I just +go into the Silences and vibrate there. + +But I kept thinking: "DO I know any Cave Men?" + +I Think I do -- one. He tries to conceal it. But +it's his secret. I'm sure. + +He has the most luminous eyes! + +Like a wolf's, you know, when it gallops across +the waste places -- under the stars, alone! + +And the way he eats! I don't mean that he's +noisy, you know. But the way he crunched a chicken +bone the last time he dined with me was perfectly +WONDERFUL -- so nonchalant, you know, and loudly +and -- and -- well, primitive! I'm SURE he's one! + +I wouldn't go autoing with him for anything -- +unless, of course, he gave me one of those compelling +glances, like Cave Men do in the magazines, you know. +Then I'd know it was destiny and useless to resist. + + + + +THE LITTLE GROUP GIVES A PAGAN MASQUE + +The Little Group gave a party + And all of the gods were there, +From Thor to Miss Susan Astarte + With doo-daddles gemming her hair, + +Bill Baldur and Jane Aphrodite, + Dick Vishnu and Benny O'Baal, +And Bacchus came on in a nightie + With little pink snakes in the tail; + +Latin, Phoenician and Hindu + Norse and Egyptian and Chink. . . . +Castor was watching his Twin do + Stunts, with a brotherly wink. . . . + +Persephone swearing by Hades. . . . + A Norn and Sibylline Simp. . . . +A Momus, who showed up to the ladies + The latest Olympian limp. + +Was Hermione present? By Crikey! + (This Crikey's a Whitechapel joss) + +Our Hermy attended as Psyche -- + She siked and she got it across + +And Fothergil Finch, rather gaumy + With Cosmic cosmetics, was there, +But the Swami went just as the Swami, + After oiling the kinks in his hair. + +I said to Hermione: "Goddess! + You're graceful, you're Greek, you're a rose, +From the pinions that rise from your bodice + To the raddle I note on your toes, + +"And Fothergil, here, with his censer, + And his little cheeks crimson as beets, +Your acolyte, perfume-dispenser, + Is sweet as a page out of Keats, + +"But tell me, my Dea -- my Psyche! -- + (With your wings outspread as to race +With that swift and acephalous Nike + Who lost her bean somewhere in Thrace) -- + +"My Thea -- my classical pigeon! -- + Is not your Sincerity shocked +By this giddy revue of religion? . . . + Are none of these gods being mocked? . . . + +"In the regions unknowable -- Thea! -- + Where the noumenon chumbs with the Nous, +Where the Idol gets hep to Idea, + And pythagoras ogles a Goose, + +"In the heavens of Brahm and Osiris, + Are they peeved with this revel, I ask? . . . +Does Pluto like this, where his fire is? . . . + What in hell do they think of this masque? . . . + +"Where the deities, avid of Is-ness, + Resurge from the Flivvers that Were, +While the wild Chaotical Whizness + Gives place to a Cosmic Whir, + +"Do they relish this josh of the josses? + Do they lamp not the same with a grouch? +Are you stinging these gloomy Big Bosses + To a keener, immortaler ouch?" + +Hermione murmured: "How eerie! + You are voicing my own Inner Mood! +Ah me! but the world is less dreary + If one is but understood! + +"And I thank you, I thank you, for rising + To my personal point of view. . . . +I THANK you for SYMPATHIZING! . . . + Dear man, how you always do!" + + + + +SYMPATHY + +OF course we're out of town for the summer -- +EVERYBODY'S out of town, now -- but +I motor in once or twice a week to keep in +touch with some of my committees. + +Sociological work, for instance, keeps right up +the year around. + +Of course, it's not so interesting in the winter. +You see more striking contrasts in the winter, don't +you think? + +A couple of girl cousins of mine from Cincinnati +have been here. They're interested in welfare work +of all sorts. + +"Hermione," they said, "we want to see the +bread line." + +"My dears," I said, "I don't mind showing it to +you, but it's nothing much to see in summer. It's +in the winter that it arouses one's deepest sympathies." + +And one must keep one's sympathies aroused. +Often I say to myself at night: "Have I been +sympathetic today, or have I FAILED?" + +Mamma often lacks sympathy. She objects to +having me reopen my Salon this winter. + +"Hermione," she said, "I don't mind the subjects +you take up -- or the people you take up with -- if +you only take them up one at a time. And I am +glad when your own little group meets here, be- +cause it keeps you at home. But I will NOT have +all the different kinds of freaks here at the SAME +TIME, sitting around discussing free love and sex +education." + +I was indignant. "Mamma," I said, "what right +have you to say they would discuss that all the +time?" + +"Because," she said, "I have noticed that no matter +whether they start with sociology or psychology, +they always get around to Sex in the end." + +Isn't it funny about pure-minded people? -- in the +generation before this anything that shocked a pure- +minded person like Mamma was sure to be bad. + +But now its only the evil-minded people who +ever get shocked at all, it seems. + +The really PUREST of the pure-minded people don't +get shocked by anything at all these days. + +I think Mamma is either getting purer-minded all +the time or is losing some of it -- I can't tell which -- +for she isn't shocked as easily as she was a few +months ago. + +But I got a shock myself recently. + +I found out that plants have Sex, you know. + +Just think of it -- carrots, onion, turnips, +potatoes, and everything! + +Isn't it frightful to think that this agitation has +spread to the vegetable kingdom? + +I vowed I would never eat another potato as +long as I lived! + +And, after all, what GOOD does it do -- letting the +vegetable kingdom have Sex, I mean? + +Even a good thing, you know, can be carried too far. + +"Mamma," I told her, "you are hopelessly behind +the times. Sex is a Great Fact. Someone must +discuss it. And who but the Leaders of Thought +are worthy to?" + +I intend to say nothing more about it now -- but +when the time comes I WILL reopen my Salon. + +And as far as talking about Sex is concerned -- +the right sort of mind will get GOOD out of it, and +the wrong sort will get HARM. + +I don't really LIKE discussions of Sex any more +than Mamma does. No really nice girl does. + +But we advanced thinkers owe a duty to the race. + +Not that the race is grateful. Especially the +lower classes. + +It was only last week that I was endeavoring to +introduce the cook to some advanced ideas -- for her +own good, you know, and because one owes a spiritual +duty to one's servants -- and she got angry and gave notice. + +The servant problem is frightful. It will have to +be taken seriously. + + + + +BLOUSES, BURGARS AND BUTTERMILK + +SOME of us -- Our Little Group of Advanced +Thinkers, you know -- are going in for Bulgarian +buttermilk. + +It came in about the time the Bulgarian blouses +did -- there was a war over there somewhere, you +know, before this big war, that made it fashionable. + +But the blouses went out, and the buttermilk +stayed in. + +It seems there's a Bulgarian by the name of +Metchnikoff in Paris who sits down and designs +these things -- the buttermilk, you know, not the +blouses. + +Isn't science wonderful -- simply WONDERFUL! + +We're going to take up Metchnikoff in a serious way. +You know what he aims to do is to lengthen life. + +The question is: "Should life be lengthened? +Or should it not? + +The Leaders of Thought will have to thresh that +out soon. + +The question of old age is a subtle one, isn't it? + +And it's very typical of our times, don't you think, +that we should discuss the problems of old age? + +Other epochs have done it, of course, but not +optimistically. + +The question enters into everything -- even millinery. + +I'm having the loveliest hat adapted from a +French model -- to wear with my lingerie costumes, +you know -- a wide-brimmed black lace with a black +velvet crown. + +It's only recently that young women could afford +to wear black, even when it was becoming. When +Mamma was young it was a sign that youth was +past. + +And nowadays, age doesn't matter so much one +way or another. A person is the age one FEELS, +you know. + +Have you thought deeply on Hypnagogic +Illusions? We're planning to take them up. + + + + +TWILIGHT SLEEP + +HAVE you read anything about the Twilight +Sleep yet? It's wonderful; simply WONDERFUL! + +The loveliest man told our little group all about +it -- just the other evening. + +"Hermione," said Mamma, "I will NOT have you +taking up any more subjects of that Easy Indian +character. No Swami shall ever enter this house +again!" + +"Mamma," I said to her, "you are hopelessly +unadvanced., It has nothing whatever to do with +Going into the Silences or Swamis. It's entirely +scientific and not psychic at all. And if it were +psychic, what then?" + +"No Swami," said Mamma, even more stubborn- +ly, "shall ever darken my door again!" + +Poor, dear, stupid Mamma! She gets things so +mixed! + +"As far as Swamis are concerned," I told her, +"the debt we owe to them in incalculable. Where, +for instance, would we have ever heard of Karma +if it had not been for the Swamis?" + +She couldn't answer; she just looked stubborn; +unadvanced people always look stubborn and glare. + +"Where," I said, "did we get the Vedantas and +Vegetarianism and Alternate Breathing from?" + +She couldn't say a word. She just pouted. + +"Who taught us," I said, "Transmigration of +Souls and Vibrations?" + +She broke down and cried. + +"Hermione," she said, "I simply HATE howdahs +and cobras and swastikas and all those Oriental +things!" + +Mamma has no idea whatever of logic. She is a +typical old-fashioned woman. + +"Mamma," I said, "cry as much as you like. You +shall not disturb MY inner Harmony! I will not +permit you to. And my mind is made up. I will +take up the Twilight Sleep in a serious way!" + +That settled it, too. + +Have you noticed, there's been just a hint of +autumn in the air these last few days? + +Have you seen the new styles for autumn? They +are wonderful; simply WONDERFUL! + + + + +INTUITION + +IN spite of all we've done for them -- by we I +mean the serious thinkers of the world -- some +people are so frightfully uncultured! + +A girl asked me the other day -- and the surprising +thing about it, too, is that she belonged to our +own Little Group of Advanced Thinkers -- she asked +me: "Hermione, don't you just done on Rubaiyat's +poetry?" + +For a moment I couldn't think who she meant at all. + +"He's not an American, is he?" I said. + +"Oh, no," she said, "he's some sort of an Oriental." + +"It isn't Rubaiyat you're thinking of, my dear," +I told her. It's Rabindranath. Rabindranath +Something-or-other, that new man -- he's wonderful, + my dear, simply wonderful." + +And then she quoted some of it and -- the idea +is too absurd for anything, but what do you sup- +pose it was? + +Omar Khayyam -- imagine! + +And really, you know, it's been years since anybody +quoted Omar Khayyam; he's QUITE gone out, you know! + +Even the question whether he was moral doesn't +attract any attention any more. Although as far +as that is concerned, the pure mind will get purity +out of him and the impure mind will get impurity. +Honi sit qui -- what is the rest of it? Oh, you +know -- it's Latin -- what the Romans used to say +about Caesar's wife and her continual suspicions. + +My, how a suspicious wife can handicap a man! + +But, of course, as women get more and more +advanced, and know about the lives men lead, they +are finding out that the suspicions were justified. + +Their intuitions told them so all the time. + +I have a lot of intuition myself -- the moment a +man comes I judge him in spite of myself. + +First impressions always last with me, too. + +You know, I'm very psychic. + +Sometimes I am almost frightened when I think +of the things my intuition would tell me if I al- +lowed it to roam at will, so to speak, among my +friends and acquaintances. + +But I restrain it. One must, you know. The +loveliest man gave us such an interesting talk on +self-restraint the other evening. + +And now I always ask myself the last thing be- +fore I go to bed at night: "Have I restrained my- +self today? Or have I failed?" + +There is no real culture without restraint, you know. + +That's where the English are so superior, don't +you think? + +I met the loveliest Englishman the other evening. +The moment I saw him I said to myself he +was one of the aristocracy. Other people have +noses like theirs, of course, but it is only the +English aristocracy who can CARRY that kind of a nose. + +And my intuition was correct -- there are only +five lives between him and a title, and one of those +is a polo player and another is at the front. + +Someone told me his family were paying him +not to go home, but what they think the poor man +would do if he were in England I don't know, +because they don't duel there, you know. If they +dueled there, of course, he might dispose of all +five lives. + +Don't you think those old European families are +so, so -- well, so ROMANTIC somehow? + + + + +STIMULATING INFLUENCES + +SCIENCE and philanthropy should go hand in +hand -- two hearts that beat as one, if you +know what I mean, and all that sort of thing. + +And they do, too. We were discussing it the +other evening -- our Little Group of Serious +Thinkers, you know -- and we decided that what +philanthropy owes to science is made up by what +science owes to philanthropy. + +Isn't it wonderful how things balance like that? + +There's the Twilight Sleep and the Mother- +Teacher Idea, for instance. + +Our little group are thinking of starting a +propaganda to urge ALL Teachers to be Mothers. + +And, of course, a lot of them might object -- but +along comes the Twilight Sleep and takes away all +POSSIBLE objections. + +And along comes Philanthropy to put the Twilight +Sleep within the reach of all -- at least, we +hope it will -- and we're going to take the matter up +with some of the Philanthropists right away. + +Isn't it just simply WONDERFUL how Modern +Thought brings subjects like that together? + +Of course, even Modern Thought couldn't do it, +unless the subjects belonged together, anyhow, could +it? Unless they were -- er -- er -- -- + +Well, you know, Affinities. Though I don't care +much for the word. + +Affinities have quite gone out, you know. You +don't hear much about Affinities this autumn. + +Nor Soul Mates, either, for that matter. + +Though I always will say there's an IDEA behind +all the talk about them. + +Isn't it odd about things that way -- how Ideas +come and go, you know, and become quite old- +fashioned, and yet all the time have a QUITE +profound Idea back of them? + +There's Cubist and Futurist Art, for instance -- +one doesn't hear nearly so much about them now, +though everyone admitted there was an Idea +behind them. + +Of course, no one knew what the Idea MEANT. + +But it was stimulating. + +And why should an Idea have to MEAN anything +if it is STIMULATING? + +Stimulation! Stimulation! That is the secret +of Modern Life! + +One should be receptive to Stimulation -- one +should strive to Stimulate! + +One owes it to the Masses to Stimulate! It is +the DUTY of the leaders of Advanced Thought! + +Nearly every night before I go to bed I ask myself, +"Have I been a Stimulating Influence today? +Or have I failed?" + +Fothergil Finch says I Stimulate HIM! + +Poor, dear man! -- he's becoming quite -- quite -- +well, er -- er -- TOO encouraged, if you know what I mean. + +Yes, that is the way with poets. + +I doubt if ANY poet ever understood a purely +Platonic Friendship. + +I gave him a long, long look last evening and said, +"Fothergil, CAN you keep on the Platonic Plane?" + +He only said, "Alas! The Platonic Plane!" + +I hope he can. I need him for my Salon. + +I'm having the entire ground floor of the house +done over for that, you know, and I may reopen it +any time now! + + + + +POLITICS + +I'M thinking of taking up politics in a practical +way. + +I've never been an active suffragist, you +know, on account of that horrid yellow color on the +banners and things. + +But one must sacrifice Ideals of Beauty to Ideals +of Usefulness, mustn't one? + +And politics is fascinating; simply FASCINATING! + +Going about and organizing working girls, you +know, and seeing Corrupt Bosses and enlisting them +for Moral Causes, and making one's self felt as a +Force -- could one make one's self more Utile? + +More spiritually Utile? + +Utility! That is what our Leaders of Thought +need to develop! + +Nearly every night before I go to bed I say to +myself: "Have I been Utile today? Or have I +FAILED?" + +Politics, practical politics, will be such an outlet +for my personality, too. + +And when I reopen my Salon I can make it count +for the Cause, too. + +We are going to give an evening soon -- our +Group of Advanced Thinkers, you know -- to a serious + and thorough study of political economy. They +say it's simply wonderful. + +The loveliest woman talked to us the other evening. +She's a poet. When women have charge of +affairs, she said, Humanitarianism, Idealism and the +Poetic Spirit will rule in public life. + +Won't that be lovely? + +But we must be practical, and get the Bosses on +our side. They are simply horrid people socially +and ethically, you know. But there's something +frightfully fascinating about the idea of bearding +them in their dens with petitions and things. + +Though how the idea of abolishing men altogether +will work out I don't know. + +Some of the leaders of the Cause seem to want it. +I have no doubt that it could be done. Some plants and +insects have only the female sex, you know. And +maybe the human race will be that way one day. + +Although, for my part, if they could only be +reformed I'd favor retaining men. + +There's something about them so -- so -- well, so +MASCULINE somehow, if you know what I mean. + +But I must hurry -- I have to do some shopping. + +Clothes are a bore, aren't they? + + + + +HERMIONE ON PSYCHICAL RESEARCH + +SPIRITUALISM is becoming quite the thing, +isn't it? + +Dear Sir Oliver Lodge has been proving +some more things quite recently, you know. How +anyone could doubt a man with such a lovely head +and face I can't imagine. + +Spiritualism and Spiritism are quite different, you +know. It has been a long time, really, since +Spiritualism was taken seriously. + +Except by superstitious people, of course. + +But Spiritism has come to stay. It has nothing +to do with superstition at all. It's part of Advanced +Thought -- quite scientific, you know, while +Spiritualism was just a fad. + +And Spiritualism is somehow more -- well, er -- +VULGAR if you get what I mean. The sort of people +one cares to know well have dropped Spiritualism +for Spiritism. + +Though, of course, a ghost is a ghost, whether it +is materialized by spiritualism or Spiritism. + +I have been often told that I am naturally very +clairvoyant -- if I were developed I would make a +splendid medium. Mediums have seen shapes +hovering around my head, and once when I was at +school I did some automatic writing. + +It was the strangest, easiest thing! I had a pencil + in my hand and without thinking of anything in +particular at all I just scribbled away, and what I +wrote was, "When in the course of human events +it becomes necessary; When in the course of human +events it becomes necessary," over and over again. + +I was quite startled, for the last thing I had been +thinking of was an algebra examination, and not +history at all. We had had our history examination +days before. + +I felt as if an unseen hand had reached out of +the Silences and grasped mine! + +Wasn't it weird? + +And I know who it was, too. A distant relative +of Mamma's on her father's side, by marriage, was +one of the men who signed the Constitution of the +United States in Faneuil Hall, in Philadelphia, in +1776, and it was HIS spirit that was trying to de- +liver his message through me! + +And only last year I came across a very similar +case. Only this was stranger than mine, if any- +thing. For it happened on a typewriter -- which +proves that the veil between the two worlds must +be very thin, doesn't it, if the spirits are taking up +modern inventions? + +It happened to one of Papa's stenographers. I +had her up to the house to take notes for a report +I was making to one of the sociological committees +I was on then. + +And she took the notes and put them into shape +for me, but when she sent the report to me the back +of one of the sheets was just full of one sentence +written over and over again. She didn't know she'd +included that sheet, of course. + +It was so curious I asked her about it. + +She looked a little queer and said that when she +wasn't thinking of anything in particular, but just +sitting before her typewriter and not working, she +always wrote that sentence. + +"It just comes into my head," she said, "and I +write it." + +"An occult force guides your fingers?" I asked. + +"Yes, ma'am, that's it," she said. + +Over and over and over again she had written, +"Now is the time for all good men to come to the +aid of the party." + +And here is the eerie part of it -- it almost frightened +me when I got it out of her! -- her father had +been some sort of politician; a district leader, or +something like that. And he was dead, and she +had had to go to work. + +But he was trying to deliver a message through her! + +Isn't Psychical Research simply wonderful! + +Not that I'd care to go in for any vulgar thing +such as tin trumpets, you know, but -- -- + +Well, there's the Astral Body. That hasn't been +vulgarized at all, if you get what I mean. Really, +the Best People have them. + + + + +ENVOY + +HERMIONE, THE DEATHLESS + +She will not die! -- in Brainstorm Slum + Fake, Nut and Freak Psychologist +Eternally shall buzz and hum, + And Spook and Swami keep their tryst + with Thinkers in a Mental Mist. +You threaten her with Night and Sorrow? + Out of the Silences, I wist, +More Little Groups will rise tomorrow! + +The lips of Patter ne'er are dumb, + The Futile Mills shall grind their grist +Of sand from now till Kingdom Come; + The Winds of Bunk are never whist. + You scowl and shake an honest fist -- +You threaten her with Night and Sorrow? + Go slay one Pseudo-Scientist, +More Little Groups will rise tomorrow! + +With Fudge to feed the Hungry Bum + She plays the Girl Philanthropist -- +Each pinchbeck, boy Millenium + She swings, a Bangle, at her wrist -- + Blithe Parrot and Pert Egoist, +You threaten her with Night and Sorrow? + Hermiones will aye persist! +More Little Groups will rise tomorrow! + +She, whom Prince Platitude has kissed, + You threaten her with Night and Sorrow? +Slay her by thousands, friend -- but list: + More Little Groups will rise tomorrow! + +(I) + + + +[END] + + + +Table of typist's changes: + +Original Table of Contents was in large and small caps. + Typist converted to upper and lower case. + +p3 Original "Anaemic" has letters "ae" printed as a single letter. +Changed to "anemic" + +p31 "is comprised" changed to "it comprised". + +p37 "blase" with grave accent mark over "e" changed to "blase'" +with single mark following the "e". + +p39 Accent mark removed from second "e" in "eugenie". + +p65 Circumflex removed from first "e" in "fete". + +p69 Dieresis removed from "e" in "stael". + +p70 Dieresis removed from second "o" in "cooperate". + +p75 Circumflex removed from first "e" in "fete". + +p106 Original "Anaemic" has letters "ae" printed as a single letter. +Changed to "anemic" + +p113 Acute accent mark removed from "e" in "ecru". + +p123 Grave accent mark removed from "e" in "winged". + +p126 "Aegean" with "AE" as a single combined capital letter] +changed to "Aegean". + +p154 Circumflex removed from first "e" in "crepe". + +p156 "benefited" changed to "benefitted" + +p163 "Phoenecian" with "oe" printed as a single combined letter +changed to "phoenecian". + +p176 "Caesar" with "ae" printed as a single combined letter +changed to "Caesar". + +p176 "duelled" changed to "dueled". + +Throughout, "m dashes" are converted to "space hyphen hyphen space". + +Single extra line spacing is provided between paragraphs for ease +of reading on screen. + +Chapter and book titles on every page of the original are omitted. + +Italics are marked with HTML tags <i> and </i> + +I changed these to CAPs for emphasis, and deleted the rest. [mh] + + + + + +End of Project Gutenberg's Hermione's Little Group of Serious Thinkers + Binary files differdiff --git a/LICENSE.txt b/LICENSE.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6312041 --- /dev/null +++ b/LICENSE.txt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +This eBook, including all associated images, markup, improvements, +metadata, and any other content or labor, has been confirmed to be +in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES. + +Procedures for determining public domain status are described in +the "Copyright How-To" at https://www.gutenberg.org. + +No investigation has been made concerning possible copyrights in +jurisdictions other than the United States. Anyone seeking to utilize +this eBook outside of the United States should confirm copyright +status under the laws that apply to them. diff --git a/README.md b/README.md new file mode 100644 index 0000000..8be25fb --- /dev/null +++ b/README.md @@ -0,0 +1,2 @@ +Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for +eBook #776 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/776) |