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diff --git a/7700.txt b/7700.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..d0d2b7f --- /dev/null +++ b/7700.txt @@ -0,0 +1,3906 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of Lysistrata, by Aristophanes + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: Lysistrata + +Author: Aristophanes + +Commentator: Jack Lindsay + +Illustrator: Norman Lindsay + +Release Date: April 6, 2008 [EBook #7700] + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK LYSISTRATA *** + + + + +Produced by Ted Garvin and the Distributed Proofreaders Team + + + + + + +LYSISTRATA + + +Translated from the Greek of + +ARISTOPHANES + +Illustrations by Norman Lindsay + + + + +FOREWORD + +_Lysistrata_ is the greatest work by Aristophanes. This blank and rash +statement is made that it may be rejected. But first let it be +understood that I do not mean it is a better written work than the +_Birds_ or the _Frogs_, or that (to descend to the scale of values that +will be naturally imputed to me) it has any more appeal to the +collectors of "curious literature" than the _Ecclesiazusae_ or the +_Thesmophoriazusae_. On the mere grounds of taste I can see an at least +equally good case made out for the _Birds_. That brightly plumaged +fantasy has an aerial wit and colour all its own. But there are certain +works in which a man finds himself at an angle of vision where there is +an especially felicitous union of the aesthetic and emotional elements +which constitute the basic qualities of his uniqueness. We recognize +these works as being welded into a strange unity, as having a +homogeneous texture of ecstasy over them that surpasses any aesthetic +surface of harmonic colour, though that harmony also is understood by +the deeper welling of imagery from the core of creative exaltation. And +I think that this occurs in _Lysistrata_. The intellectual and spiritual +tendrils of the poem are more truly interwoven, the operation of their +centres more nearly unified; and so the work goes deeper into life. It +is his greatest play because of this, because it holds an intimate +perfume of femininity and gives the finest sense of the charm of a +cluster of girls, the sweet sense of their chatter, and the contact of +their bodies, that is to be found before Shakespeare, because that +mocking gaiety we call Aristophanies reaches here its most positive +acclamation of life, vitalizing sex with a deep delight, a rare +happiness of the spirit. + +Indeed it is precisely for these reasons that it is _not_ considered +Aristophanes' greatest play. + +To take a case which is sufficiently near to the point in question, to +make clear what I mean: the supremacy of _Antony and Cleopatra_ in the +Shakespearean aesthetic is yet jealously disputed, and it seems silly to +the academic to put it up against a work like _Hamlet_. But it is the +comparatively more obvious achievement of _Hamlet_, its surface +intellectuality, which made it the favourite of actors and critics. It +is much more difficult to realize the complex and delicately passionate +edge of the former play's rhythm, its tides of hugely wandering emotion, +the restless, proud, gay, and agonized reaction from life, of the blood, +of the mind, of the heart, which is its unity, than to follow the +relatively straightforward definition of Hamlet's nerves. Not that +anything derogatory to _Hamlet_ or the _Birds_ is intended; but the +value of such works is not enhanced by forcing them into contrast with +other works which cover deeper and wider nexus of aesthetic and +spiritual material. It is the very subtlety of the vitality of such +works as _Antony and Cleopatra_ and _Lysistrata_ that makes it so easy +to undervalue them, to see only a phallic play and political pamphlet in +one, only a chronicle play in a grandiose method in the other. For we +have to be in a highly sensitized condition before we can get to that +subtle point where life and the image mix, and so really perceive the +work at all; whereas we can command the response to a lesser work which +does not call so finely on the full breadth and depth of our spiritual +resources. + +I amuse myself at times with the fancy that Homer, Sappho, and +Aristophanes are the inviolable Trinity of poetry, even to the extent of +being reducible to One. For the fiery and lucid directness of Sappho, if +her note of personal lyricism is abstracted, is seen to be an element of +Homer, as is the profoundly balanced humour of Aristophanes, at once +tenderly human and cruelly hard, as of a god to whom all sympathies and +tolerances are known, but who is invulnerable somewhere, who sees from a +point in space where the pressure of earth's fear and pain, and so its +pity, is lifted. It is here that the Shakespearean and Homeric worlds +impinge and merge, not to be separated by any academic classifications. +They meet in this sensitivity equally involved and aloof, sympathetic +and arrogant, suffering and joyous; and in this relation we see +Aristophanes as the forerunner of Shakespeare, his only one. We see also +that the whole present aesthetic of earth is based in Homer. We live and +grow in the world of consciousness bequeathed to us by him; and if we +grow beyond it through deeper Shakespearean ardours, it is because those +beyond are rooted in the broad basis of the Homeric imagination. To +shift that basis is to find the marshes of primitive night and fear +alone beneath the feet: Christianity. + +And here we return to the question of the immorality of _Lysistrata_. +First we may inquire: is it possible for a man whose work has so +tremendous a significance in the spiritual development of mankind--and I +do not think anyone nowadays doubts that a work of art is the sole +stabilizing force that exists for life--is it possible for a man who +stands so grandly at head of an immense stream of liberating effort to +write an immoral work? Surely the only enduring moral virtue which can +be claimed is for that which moves to more power, beauty and delight in +the future? The plea that the question of changing customs arises is not +valid, for customs ratified by Aristophanes, by Rabelais, by +Shakespeare, have no right to change. If they have changed, let us try +immediately to return from our disgraceful refinements to the nobler and +more rarefied heights of lyric laughter, tragic intensity, and wit, for +we cannot have the first two without the last. And anyhow, how can a +social custom claim precedence over the undying material of the senses +and the emotions of man, over the very generating forces of life? + +How could the humanistic emotions, such as pity, justice, sympathy, +exist save as pacifistic quietings of the desire to slay, to hurt, to +torment. Where the desire to hurt is gone pity ceases to be a +significant, a central emotion. It must of course continue to exist, but +it is displaced in the spiritual hierarchy; and all that moves +courageously, desirously, and vitally into the action of life takes on a +deeper and subtler intention. Lust, then, which on the lower plane was +something to be very frightened of, becomes a symbol of the highest +spirituality. It is right for Paul to be terrified of sex and so to hate +it, because he has so freshly escaped a bestial condition of life that +it threatens to plunge him back if he listens to one whisper But it is +also right for a Shakespeare to suck every drop of desire from life, +for he is building into a higher condition, one self-willed, +self-responsible, the discipline of which comes from joy, not fear. + +Sex, therefore, is an animal function, one admits, one insists; it may +be only that. But also in the bewildering and humorous and tragic +duality of all life's energies, it is the bridge to every eternity which +is not merely a spectral condition of earth disembowelled of its lusts. +For sex holds the substance of the image. But we must remember with +Heine that Aristophanes is the God of this ironic earth, and that all +argument is apparently vitiated from the start by the simple fact that +Wagner and a rooster are given an analogous method of making love. And +therefore it seems impeccable logic to say that all that is most unlike +the rooster is the most spiritual part of love. All will agree on that, +schisms only arise when one tries to decide what does go farthest from +the bird's automatic mechanism. Certainly not a Dante-Beatrice affair +which is only the negation of the rooster in terms of the swooning +bombast of adolescence, the first onslaught of a force which the +sufferer cannot control or inhabit with all the potentialities of his +body and soul. But the rooster is troubled by no dreams of a divine +orgy, no carnival-loves like Beethoven's _Fourth Symphony_, no heroic +and shining lust gathering and swinging into a merry embrace like the +third act of _Siegfried_. It is desire in this sense that goes farthest +from the animal. + +Consciously, no one can achieve the act of love on earth as a completed +thing of grace, with whatever delirium of delight, with whatever +ingenious preciosity, we go through its process. Only as an image of +beauty mated in some strange hermaphroditic ecstasy is that possible. I +mean only as a dream projected into a hypothetical, a real heaven. But +on earth we cannot complete the cycle in consciousness that would give +us the freedom of an image in which two identities mysteriously realize +their separate unities by the absorption of a third thing, the +constructive rhythm of a work of art. It is thus that Tristan and Isolde +become wholly distinct individuals, yet wholly submerged in the unity +that is Wagner; and so reconcile life's duality by balancing its +opposing laughters in a definite form--thereby sending out into life a +profounder duality than existed before. A Platonic equipoise, +Nietzsche's Eternal Recurrence--the only real philosophic problem, +therefore one of which these two philosophers alone are aware. + +But though Wagner with Mathilde Wesendonck in his arms was Tristan in +the arms of Isolde, he did not find a melody instead of a kiss on his +lips; he did not find a progression of harmonies melting through the +contours of a warm beauty with a blur of desperate ecstasies, semitones +of desire, he found only the anxious happiness of any other lover. +Nevertheless, he was gathering the substance of the second act of +_Tristan und Isolde_. And it is this that Plato means when he says that +fornication is something immortal in mortality. He does not mean that +the act itself is a godlike thing, a claim which any bedroom mirror +would quickly deride. He means that it is a symbol, an essential +condition, and a part of something that goes deeper into life than any +geometry of earth's absurd, passionate, futile, and very necessary +antics would suggest. + +It is a universal fallacy that because works like the comedies of +Aristophanes discuss certain social or ethical problems, they are +inspired by them. Aristophanes wrote to express his vision on life, his +delight in life itself seen behind the warping screen of contemporary +event; and for his purposes anything from Euripides to Cleon served as +ground work. Not that he would think in those terms, naturally: but the +rationalizing process that goes on in consciousness during the creation +of a work of art, for all its appearance of directing matters, is the +merest weathercock in the wind of the subconscious intention. As an +example of how utterly it is possible to misunderstand the springs of +inspiration in a poem, we may take the following remark of B. B. Rogers: +_It is much to be regretted that the phallus element should be so +conspicuous in this play.... (This) coarseness, so repulsive to +ourselves, was introduced, it is impossible to doubt, for the express +purpose of counter-balancing the extreme earnestness and gravity of the +play_. It seems so logical, so irrefutable; and so completely +misinterprets every creative force of Aristophanes' Psyche that it +certainly deserves a little admiration. It is in the best academic +tradition, and everyone respects a man for writing so mendaciously. The +effort of these castrators is always to show that the parts considered +offensive are not the natural expression of the poet, that they are +dictated externally. They argue that Shakespeare's coarseness is the +result of the age and not personal predilection, completely ignoring the +work of men like Sir Philip Sidney and Spenser, indeed practically all +the pre-Shakespearean writers, in whom none of this so-called grossness +exists. Shakespeare wrote sculduddery because he liked it, and for no +other reason; his sensuality is the measure of his vitality. These liars +pretend similarly that because Rabelais had a humanistic reason for much +of his work--the destructior Mediaevalism, and the Church, which purpose +they construe of course as an effort to purify, etc.--therefore he only +put the lewdery to make the rest palatable, when it should be obvious +even to an academic how he glories in his wild humour. + +What the academic cannot understand is that in such works, while +attacking certain conditions, the creative power of the vigorous spirits +is so great that it overflows and saturates the intellectual conception +with their own passionate sense of life. It is for this reason that +these works have an eternal significance. If Rabelais were merely a +social reformer, then the value of his work would not have outlived his +generation. If _Lysistrata_ were but a wise political tract, it would +have merely an historical interest, and it would have ceased spiritually +at 404 B.C. + +But Panurge is as fantastic and fascinating a character now as he was +300 years ago, Lysistrata and her girls as freshly bodied as any girl +kissed to-day. Therefore the serious part of the play is that which +deals with them, the frivolous part that in which Rogers detects gravity +and earnestness. + +Aristophanes is the lord of all who take life as a gay adventure, who +defy all efforts to turn life into a social, economic, or moral +abstraction. Is it therefore just that the critics who, by some dark +instinct, unerringly pick out the exact opposite of any creator's real +virtues as his chief characteristics, should praise him as an idealistic +reformer? An "ideal" state of society was the last thing Aristophanes +desired. He wished, certainly, to eliminate inhumanities and baseness; +but only that there might be free play for laughter, for individual +happiness. + +Consequently the critics lay the emphasis on the effort to cleanse +society, not the method of laughter. Aristophanes wished to destroy +Cleon because that demagogue failed to realize the poet's conception of +dignified government and tended to upset the stability of Hellas. But it +was the stability of life, the vindication of all individual freedoms, +in which he was ultimately interested. + +JACK LINDSAY. + + + * * * * * + + +LYSISTRATA + +The Persons of the drama. + +LYSISTRATA +CALONICE +MYRRHINE +LAMPITO +Stratyllis, etc. +Chorus of Women. +MAGISTRATE +CINESIAS +SPARTAN HERALD +ENVOYS +ATHENIANS +Porter, Market Idlers, etc. +Chorus of old Men. + + +LYSISTRATA _stands alone with the Propylaea at her back._ + + +LYSISTRATA + +If they were trysting for a Bacchanal, +A feast of Pan or Colias or Genetyllis, +The tambourines would block the rowdy streets, +But now there's not a woman to be seen +Except--ah, yes--this neighbour of mine yonder. + +_Enter_ CALONICE. + +Good day Calonice. + +CALONICE + +Good day Lysistrata. +But what has vexed you so? Tell me, child. +What are these black looks for? It doesn't suit you +To knit your eyebrows up glumly like that. + +LYSISTRATA + +Calonice, it's more than I can bear, +I am hot all over with blushes for our sex. +Men say we're slippery rogues-- + +CALONICE + +And aren't they right? + +LYSISTRATA + +Yet summoned on the most tremendous business +For deliberation, still they snuggle in bed. + +CALONICE + +My dear, they'll come. It's hard for women, you know, +To get away. There's so much to do; +Husbands to be patted and put in good tempers: +Servants to be poked out: children washed +Or soothed with lullays or fed with mouthfuls of pap. + +LYSISTRATA + +But I tell you, here's a far more weighty object. + +CALONICE + +What is it all about, dear Lysistrata, +That you've called the women hither in a troop? +What kind of an object is it? + +LYSISTRATA + +A tremendous thing! + +CALONICE + +And long? + +LYSISTRATA + +Indeed, it may be very lengthy. + +CALONICE + +Then why aren't they here? + +LYSISTRATA + +No man's connected with it; +If that was the case, they'd soon come fluttering along. +No, no. It concerns an object I've felt over +And turned this way and that for sleepless nights. + +CALONICE + +It must be fine to stand such long attention. + +LYSISTRATA + +So fine it comes to this--Greece saved by Woman! + +CALONICE + +By Woman? Wretched thing, I'm sorry for it. + +LYSISTRATA + +Our country's fate is henceforth in our hands: +To destroy the Peloponnesians root and branch-- + +CALONICE + +What could be nobler! + +LYSISTRATA + +Wipe out the Boeotians-- + +CALONICE + +Not utterly. Have mercy on the eels! +[Footnote: The Boeotian eels were highly esteemed delicacies in Athens.] + +LYSISTRATA + +But with regard to Athens, note I'm careful +Not to say any of these nasty things; +Still, thought is free.... But if the women join us +From Peloponnesus and Boeotia, then +Hand in hand we'll rescue Greece. + +CALONICE + +How could we do +Such a big wise deed? We women who dwell +Quietly adorning ourselves in a back-room +With gowns of lucid gold and gawdy toilets +Of stately silk and dainty little slippers.... + +LYSISTRATA + +These are the very armaments of the rescue. +These crocus-gowns, this outlay of the best myrrh, +Slippers, cosmetics dusting beauty, and robes +With rippling creases of light. + +CALONICE + +Yes, but how? + +LYSISTRATA + +No man will lift a lance against another-- + +CALONICE + +I'll run to have my tunic dyed crocus. + +LYSISTRATA + +Or take a shield-- + +CALONICE + +I'll get a stately gown. + +LYSISTRATA + +Or unscabbard a sword-- + +CALONICE + +Let me buy a pair of slipper. + +LYSISTRATA + +Now, tell me, are the women right to lag? + +CALONICE + +They should have turned birds, they should have grown +wings and flown. + +LYSISTRATA + +My friend, you'll see that they are true Athenians: +Always too late. Why, there's not a woman +From the shoreward demes arrived, not one from Salamis. + +CALONICE + +I know for certain they awoke at dawn, +And got their husbands up if not their boat sails. + +LYSISTRATA + +And I'd have staked my life the Acharnian dames +Would be here first, yet they haven't come either! + +CALONICE + +Well anyhow there is Theagenes' wife +We can expect--she consulted Hecate. +But look, here are some at last, and more behind them. +See ... where are they from? + +CALONICE + +From Anagyra they come. + +LYSISTRATA + +Yes, they generally manage to come first. + +_Enter_ MYRRHINE. + +MYRRHINE + +Are we late, Lysistrata? ... What is that? +Nothing to say? + +LYSISTRATA + +I've not much to say for you, +Myrrhine, dawdling on so vast an affair. + +MYRRHINE + +I couldn't find my girdle in the dark. +But if the affair's so wonderful, tell us, what is it? + +LYSISTRATA + +No, let us stay a little longer till +The Peloponnesian girls and the girls of Bocotia +Are here to listen. + +MYRRHINE + +That's the best advice. +Ah, there comes Lampito. + +_Enter_ LAMPITO. + +LYSISTRATA + +Welcome Lampito! +Dear Spartan girl with a delightful face, +Washed with the rosy spring, how fresh you look +In the easy stride of your sleek slenderness, +Why you could strangle a bull! + +LAMPITO + +I think I could. +It's frae exercise and kicking high behint. + +[Footnote: The translator has put the speech of the Spartan characters +in Scotch dialect which is related to English about as was the Spartan +dialect to the speech of Athens. The Spartans, in their character, +anticipated the shrewd, canny, uncouth Scotch highlander of modern +times.] + +LYSISTRATA + +What lovely breasts to own! + +LAMPITO + +Oo ... your fingers +Assess them, ye tickler, wi' such tender chucks +I feel as if I were an altar-victim. + +LYSISTRATA + +Who is this youngster? + +LAMPITO + +A Boeotian lady. + +LYSISTRATA + +There never was much undergrowth in Boeotia, +Such a smooth place, and this girl takes after it. + +CALONICE + +Yes, I never saw a skin so primly kept. + +LYSISTRATA + +This girl? + +LAMPITO + +A sonsie open-looking jinker! +She's a Corinthian. + +LYSISTRATA + +Yes, isn't she +Very open, in some ways particularly. + +LAMPITO + +But who's garred this Council o' Women to meet here? + +LYSISTRATA + +I have. + +LAMPITO + +Propound then what you want o' us. + +MYRRHINE + +What is the amazing news you have to tell? + +LYSISTRATA + +I'll tell you, but first answer one small question. + +MYRRHINE + +As you like. + +LYSISTRATA + +Are you not sad your children's fathers +Go endlessly off soldiering afar +In this plodding war? I am willing to wager +There's not one here whose husband is at home. + +CALONICE + +Mine's been in Thrace, keeping an eye on Eucrates +For five months past. + +MYRRHINE + +And mine left me for Pylos +Seven months ago at least. + +LAMPITO + +And as for mine +No sooner has he slipped out frae the line +He straps his shield and he's snickt off again. + +LYSISTRATA + +And not the slightest glitter of a lover! +And since the Milesians betrayed us, I've not seen +The image of a single upright man +To be a marble consolation to us. +Now will you help me, if I find a means +To stamp the war out. + +MYRRHINE + +By the two Goddesses, Yes! +I will though I've to pawn this very dress +And drink the barter-money the same day. + +CALONICE + +And I too though I'm split up like a turbot +And half is hackt off as the price of peace. + +LAMPITO + +And I too! Why, to get a peep at the shy thing +I'd clamber up to the tip-top o' Taygetus. + +LYSISTRATA + +Then I'll expose my mighty mystery. +O women, if we would compel the men +To bow to Peace, we must refrain-- + +MYRRHINE + +From what? +O tell us! + +LYSISTRATA + +Will you truly do it then? + +MYRRHINE + +We will, we will, if we must die for it. + +LYSISTRATA + +We must refrain from every depth of love.... +Why do you turn your backs? Where are you going? +Why do you bite your lips and shake your heads? +Why are your faces blanched? Why do you weep? +Will you or won't you, or what do you mean? + +MYRRHINE + +No, I won't do it. Let the war proceed. + +CALONICE + +No, I won't do it. Let the war proceed. + +LYSISTRATA + +You too, dear turbot, you that said just now +You didn't mind being split right up in the least? + +CALONICE + +Anything else? O bid me walk in fire +But do not rob us of that darling joy. +What else is like it, dearest Lysistrata? + +LYSISTRATA + +And you? + +MYRRHINE + +O please give me the fire instead. + +LYSISTRATA + +Lewd to the least drop in the tiniest vein, +Our sex is fitly food for Tragic Poets, +Our whole life's but a pile of kisses and babies. +But, hardy Spartan, if you join with me +All may be righted yet. O help me, help me. + +LAMPITO + +It's a sair, sair thing to ask of us, by the Twa, +A lass to sleep her lane and never fill +Love's lack except wi' makeshifts.... But let it be. +Peace maun be thought of first. + +LYSISTRATA + +My friend, my friend! +The only one amid this herd of weaklings. + +CALONICE + +But if--which heaven forbid--we should refrain +As you would have us, how is Peace induced? + +LYSISTRATA + +By the two Goddesses, now can't you see +All we have to do is idly sit indoors +With smooth roses powdered on our cheeks, +Our bodies burning naked through the folds +Of shining Amorgos' silk, and meet the men +With our dear Venus-plats plucked trim and neat. +Their stirring love will rise up furiously, +They'll beg our arms to open. That's our time! +We'll disregard their knocking, beat them off-- +And they will soon be rabid for a Peace. +I'm sure of it. + +LAMPITO + + Just as Menelaus, they say, +Seeing the bosom of his naked Helen +Flang down the sword. + +CALONICE + + But we'll be tearful fools +If our husbands take us at our word and leave us. + +LYSISTRATA + +There's only left then, in Pherecrates' phrase, +_To flay a skinned dog_--flay more our flayed desires. + +CALONICE + +Bah, proverbs will never warm a celibate. +But what avail will your scheme be if the men +Drag us for all our kicking on to the couch? + +LYSISTRATA + +Cling to the doorposts. + +CALONICE + + But if they should force us? + +LYSISTRATA + +Yield then, but with a sluggish, cold indifference. +There is no joy to them in sullen mating. +Besides we have other ways to madden them; +They cannot stand up long, and they've no delight +Unless we fit their aim with merry succour. + +CALONICE + +Well if you must have it so, we'll all agree. + +LAMPITO + +For us I ha' no doubt. We can persuade +Our men to strike a fair an' decent Peace, +But how will ye pitch out the battle-frenzy +O' the Athenian populace? + +LYSISTRATA + +I promise you +We'll wither up that curse. + +LAMPITO + +I don't believe it. +Not while they own ane trireme oared an' rigged, +Or a' those stacks an' stacks an' stacks O' siller. + +LYSISTRATA + +I've thought the whole thing out till there's no flaw. +We shall surprise the Acropolis today: +That is the duty set the older dames. +While we sit here talking, they are to go +And under pretence of sacrificing, seize it. + +LAMPITO + +Certie, that's fine; all's working for the best. + +LYSISTRATA + +Now quickly, Lampito, let us tie ourselves +To this high purpose as tightly as the hemp of words +Can knot together. + +LAMPITO + +Set out the terms in detail +And we'll a' swear to them. + +LYSISTRATA + +Of course.... Well then +Where is our Scythianess? Why are you staring? +First lay the shield, boss downward, on the floor +And bring the victim's inwards. + +CAILONICE + +But, Lysistrata, +What is this oath that we're to swear? + +LYSISTRATA + +What oath! +In Aeschylus they take a slaughtered sheep +And swear upon a buckler. Why not we? + +CALONICE + +O Lysistrata, Peace sworn on a buckler! + +LYSISTRATA + +What oath would suit us then? + +CALONICE + +Something burden bearing +Would be our best insignia.... A white horse! +Let's swear upon its entrails. + +LYSISTRATA + +A horse indeed! + +CALONICE + +Then what will symbolise us? + +LYSISTRATA + +This, as I tell you-- +First set a great dark bowl upon the ground +And disembowel a skin of Thasian wine, +Then swear that we'll not add a drop of water. + +LAMPITO + Ah, what aith could clink pleasanter than that! + +LYSISTRATA + Bring me a bowl then and a skin of wine. + +CALONICE + My dears, see what a splendid bowl it is; + I'd not say No if asked to sip it off. + +LYSISTRATA + Put down the bowl. Lay hands, all, on the victim. + Skiey Queen who givest the last word in arguments, + And thee, O Bowl, dear comrade, we beseech: + Accept our oblation and be propitious to us. + +CALONICE + What healthy blood, la, how it gushes out! + +LAMPITO + An' what a leesome fragrance through the air. + +LYSISTRATA + Now, dears, if you will let me, I'll speak first. + +CALONICE + Only if you draw the lot, by Aphrodite! + +LYSISTRATA + SO, grasp the brim, you, Lampito, and all. + You, Calonice, repeat for the rest + Each word I say. Then you must all take oath + And pledge your arms to the same stern conditions-- + +LYSISTRATA + To husband or lover I'll not open arms + +CALONICE + +_To husband or lover I'll not open arms_ + +LYSISTRATA + +Though love and denial may enlarge his charms. + +CALONICE + +_Though love and denial may enlarge his charms._ +O, O, my knees are failing me, Lysistrata! + +LYSISTRATA + +But still at home, ignoring him, I'll stay, + +CALONICE + +_But still at home, ignoring him, I'll stay,_ + +LYSISTRATA + +Beautiful, clad in saffron silks all day. + +CALONICE + +_Beautiful, clad in saffron silks all day._ + +LYSISTRATA + +If then he seizes me by dint of force, + +CALONICE + +_If then he seizes me by dint of force,_ + +LYSISTRATA + +I'll give him reason for a long remorse. + +CALONICE + +_I'll give him reason for a long remorse._ + +LYSISTRATA + +I'll never lie and stare up at the ceiling, + +CALONICE + +_I'll never lie and stare up at the ceiling,_ + +LYSISTRATA + +Nor like a lion on all fours go kneeling. + +CALONICE + +_Nor like a lion on all fours go kneeling._ + +LYSISTRATA + +If I keep faith, then bounteous cups be mine. + +CALONICE + +_If I keep faith, then bounteous cups be mine._ + +LYSISTRATA + +If not, to nauseous water change this wine. + +CALONICE + _If not, to nauseous water change this wine._ + +LYSISTRATA + +Do you all swear to this? + +MYRRHINE + +We do, we do. + +LYSISTRATA + +Then I shall immolate the victim thus. +_She drinks._ + +CALONICE + +Here now, share fair, haven't we made a pact? +Let's all quaff down that friendship in our turn. + +LAMPITO + +Hark, what caterwauling hubbub's that? + +LYSISTRATA + +As I told you, +The women have appropriated the citadel. +So, Lampito, dash off to your own land +And raise the rebels there. These will serve as hostages, +While we ourselves take our places in the ranks +And drive the bolts right home. + +CALONICE + +But won't the men +March straight against us? + +LYSISTRATA + +And what if they do? +No threat shall creak our hinges wide, no torch +Shall light a fear in us; we will come out +To Peace alone. + +CALONICE + +That's it, by Aphrodite! +As of old let us seem hard and obdurate. + +LAMPITO _and some go off; the others go up into the Acropolis._ + +_Chorus of_ OLD MEN _enter to attack the captured Acropolis_. + +Make room, Draces, move ahead; why your shoulder's chafed, I see, +With lugging uphill these lopped branches of the olive-tree. +How upside-down and wrong-way-round a long life sees things grow. +Ah, Strymodorus, who'd have thought affairs could tangle so? + +The women whom at home we fed, +Like witless fools, with fostering bread, +Have impiously come to this-- +They've stolen the Acropolis, +With bolts and bars our orders flout +And shut us out. + +Come, Philurgus, bustle thither; lay our faggots on the ground, +In neat stacks beleaguering the insurgents all around; +And the vile conspiratresses, plotters of such mischief dire, +Pile and burn them all together in one vast and righteous pyre: +Fling with our own hands Lycon's wife to fry in the thickest fire. +By Demeter, they'll get no brag while I've a vein to beat! +Cleomenes himself was hurtled out in sore defeat. +His stiff-backed Spartan pride was bent. +Out, stripped of all his arms, he went: +A pigmy cloak that would not stretch +To hide his rump (the draggled wretch), +Six sprouting years of beard, the spilth +Of six years' filth. + +That was a siege! Our men were ranged in lines of seventeen deep +Before the gates, and never left their posts there, even to sleep. +Shall I not smite the rash presumption then of foes like these, +Detested both of all the gods and of Euripides-- +Else, may the Marathon-plain not boast my trophied victories! + +Ah, now, there's but a little space +To reach the place! +A deadly climb it is, a tricky road +With all this bumping load: +A pack-ass soon would tire.... +How these logs bruise my shoulders! further still +Jog up the hill, +And puff the fire inside, +Or just as we reach the top we'll find it's died. +Ough, phew! +I choke with the smoke. + +Lord Heracles, how acrid-hot +Out of the pot +This mad-dog smoke leaps, worrying me +And biting angrily.... +'Tis Lemnian fire that smokes, +Or else it would not sting my eyelids thus.... +Haste, all of us; +Athene invokes our aid. +Laches, now or never the assault must be made! +Ough, phew! +I choke with the smoke. .. + +Thanked be the gods! The fire peeps up and crackles as it should. +Now why not first slide off our backs these weary loads of wood +And dip a vine-branch in the brazier till it glows, then straight +Hurl it at the battering-ram against the stubborn gate? +If they refuse to draw the bolts in immediate compliance, +We'll set fire to the wood, and smoke will strangle their defiance. + +Phew, what a spluttering drench of smoke! Come, now from off my back.... +Is there no Samos-general to help me to unpack? +Ah there, that's over! For the last time now it's galled my shoulder. +Flare up thine embers, brazier, and dutifully smoulder, +To kindle a brand, that I the first may strike the citadel. +Aid me, Lady Victory, that a triumph-trophy may tell +How we did anciently this insane audacity quell! + +_Chorus of_ WOMEN. + +What's that rising yonder? That ruddy glare, that smoky skurry? +O is it something in a blaze? Quick, quick, my comrades, hurry! +Nicodice, helter-skelter! +Or poor Calyce's in flames +And Cratylla's stifled in the welter. +O these dreadful old men +And their dark laws of hate! +There, I'm all of a tremble lest I turn out to be too late. +I could scarcely get near to the spring though I rose before dawn, +What with tattling of tongues and rattling of pitchers in one jostling din +With slaves pushing in!.... + +Still here at last the water's drawn +And with it eagerly I run +To help those of my friends who stand +In danger of being burned alive. +For I am told a dribbling band +Of greybeards hobble to the field, +Great faggots in each palsied hand, +As if a hot bath to prepare, +And threatening that out they'll drive +These wicked women or soon leave them charring into ashes +there. +O Goddess, suffer not, I pray, this harsh deed to be done, +But show us Greece and Athens with their warlike acts repealed! +For this alone, in this thy hold, +Thou Goddess with the helm of gold, +We laid hands on thy sanctuary, +Athene.... Then our ally be +And where they cast their fires of slaughter +Direct our water! + +STRATYLLIS (_caught_) + +Let me go! + +WOMEN + +You villainous old men, what's this you do? +No honest man, no pious man, could do such things as you. + +MEN + +Ah ha, here's something most original, I have no doubt: +A swarm of women sentinels to man the walls without. + +WOMEN + +So then we scare you, do we? Do we seem a fearful host? +You only see the smallest fraction mustered at this post. + +MEN + +Ho, Phaedrias, shall we put a stop to all these chattering tricks? +Suppose that now upon their backs we splintered these our sticks? + +WOMEN + +Let us lay down the pitchers, so our bodies will be free, + In case these lumping fellows try to cause some injury. + +MEN + +O hit them hard and hit again and hit until they run away, +And perhaps they'll learn, like Bupalus, not to have too much to say. + +WOMEN + +Come on, then--do it! I won't budge, but like a dog I'll bite +At every little scrap of meat that dangles in my sight. + +MEN + +Be quiet, or I'll bash you out of any years to come. + +WOMEN + +Now you just touch Stratyllis with the top-joint of your thumb. + +MEN + +What vengeance can you take if with my fists your face I beat? + +WOMEN + +I'll rip you with my teeth and strew your entrails at your feet. + +MEN + +Now I appreciate Euripides' strange subtlety: +Woman is the most shameless beast of all the beasts that be. + +WOMEN + +Rhodippe, come, and let's pick up our water-jars once more. + +MEN + +Ah cursed drab, what have you brought this water for? + +WOMEN + +What is your fire for then, you smelly corpse? Yourself to burn? + +MEN + +To build a pyre and make your comrades ready for the urn. + +WOMEN + +And I've the water to put out your fire immediately. + +MEN + +What, you put out my fire? + +WOMEN + +Yes, sirrah, as you soon will see. + +MEN + +I don't know why I hesitate to roast you with this flame. + +WOMEN + +If you have any soap you'll go off cleaner than you came. + +MEN + +Cleaner, you dirty slut? + +WOMEN + +A nuptial-bath in which to lie! + +MEN + +Did you hear that insolence? + +WOMEN + +I'm a free woman, I. + +MEN + +I'll make you hold your tongue. + +WOMEN + +Henceforth you'll serve in no more juries. + +MEN + +Burn off her hair for her. + +WOMEN + +Now forward, water, quench their furies! + +MEN + +O dear, O dear! + +WOMEN + +So ... was it hot? + +MEN + +Hot! ... Enough, O hold. + +WOMEN + +Watered, perhaps you'll bloom again--why not? + +MEN + +Brrr, I'm wrinkled up from shivering with cold. + +WOMEN + +Next time you've fire you'll warm yourself and leave us to our lot. + +MAGISTRATE _enters with attendant_ SCYTHIANS. + +MAGISTRATE + +Have the luxurious rites of the women glittered +Their libertine show, their drumming tapped out crowds, +The Sabazian Mysteries summoned their mob, +Adonis been wept to death on the terraces, +As I could hear the last day in the Assembly? +For Demostratus--let bad luck befoul him-- +Was roaring, "We must sail for Sicily," +While a woman, throwing herself about in a dance +Lopsided with drink, was shrilling out "Adonis, +Woe for Adonis." Then Demostratus shouted, +"We must levy hoplites at Zacynthus," +And there the woman, up to the ears in wine, +Was screaming "Weep for Adonis" on the house-top, +The scoundrelly politician, that lunatic ox, +Bellowing bad advice through tipsy shrieks: +Such are the follies wantoning in them. + +MEN + +O if you knew their full effrontery! +All of the insults they've done, besides sousing us +With water from their pots to our public disgrace +For we stand here wringing our clothes like grown-up infants. + +MAGISTRATE + +By Poseidon, justly done! For in part with us +The blame must lie for dissolute behaviour +And for the pampered appetites they learn. +Thus grows the seedling lust to blossoming: +We go into a shop and say, "Here, goldsmith, +You remember the necklace that you wrought my wife; +Well, the other night in fervour of a dance +Her clasp broke open. Now I'm off for Salamis; +If you've the leisure, would you go tonight +And stick a bolt-pin into her opened clasp." +Another goes to a cobbler; a soldierly fellow, +Always standing up erect, and says to him, +"Cobbler, a sandal-strap of my wife's pinches her, +Hurts her little toe in a place where she's sensitive. +Come at noon and see if you can stretch out wider +This thing that troubles her, loosen its tightness." +And so you view the result. Observe my case-- +I, a magistrate, come here to draw +Money to buy oar-blades, and what happens? +The women slam the door full in my face. +But standing still's no use. Bring me a crowbar, +And I'll chastise this their impertinence. +What do you gape at, wretch, with dazzled eyes? +Peering for a tavern, I suppose. +Come, force the gates with crowbars, prise them apart! +I'll prise away myself too.... (LYSISTRATA _appears._) + +LYSISTRATA + +Stop this banging. +I'm coming of my own accord.... Why bars? +It is not bars we need but common sense. + +MAGISTRATE + +Indeed, you slut! Where is the archer now? +Arrest this woman, tie her hands behind. + +LYSISTRATA + +If he brushes me with a finger, by Artemis, +The public menial, he'll be sorry for it. + +MAGISTRATE + +Are you afraid? Grab her about the middle. +Two of you then, lay hands on her and end it. + +CALONICE + +By Pandrosos I if your hand touches her +I'll spread you out and trample on your guts. + +MAGISTRATE + +My guts! Where is the other archer gone? +Bind that minx there who talks so prettily. + +MYRRHINE + +By Phosphor, if your hand moves out her way +You'd better have a surgeon somewhere handy. + +MAGISTRATE + +You too! Where is that archer? Take that woman. +I'll put a stop to these surprise-parties. + +STRATYLLIS + +By the Tauric Artemis, one inch nearer +My fingers, and it's a bald man that'll be yelling. + +MAGISTRATE + +Tut tut, what's here? Deserted by my archers.... +But surely women never can defeat us; +Close up your ranks, my Scythians. Forward at them. + +LYSISTRATA + +By the Goddesses, you'll find that here await you +Four companies of most pugnacious women +Armed cap-a-pie from the topmost louring curl +To the lowest angry dimple. + +MAGISTRATE + +On, Scythians, bind them. + +LYSISTRATA + +On, gallant allies of our high design, +Vendors of grain-eggs-pulse-and-vegetables, +Ye garlic-tavern-keepers of bakeries, +Strike, batter, knock, hit, slap, and scratch our foes, +Be finely imprudent, say what you think of them.... +Enough! retire and do not rob the dead. + +MAGISTRATE + +How basely did my archer-force come off. + +LYSISTRATA + +Ah, ha, you thought it was a herd of slaves +You had to tackle, and you didn't guess +The thirst for glory ardent in our blood. + +MAGISTRATE + +By Apollo, I know well the thirst that heats you-- +Especially when a wine-skin's close. + +MEN + +You waste your breath, dear magistrate, I fear, in answering back. +What's the good of argument with such a rampageous pack? +Remember how they washed us down (these very clothes I wore) +With water that looked nasty and that smelt so even more. + +WOMEN + +What else to do, since you advanced too dangerously nigh. +If you should do the same again, I'll punch you in the eye. +Though I'm a stay-at-home and most a quiet life enjoy, +Polite to all and every (for I'm naturally coy), +Still if you wake a wasps' nest then of wasps you must beware. + +MEN + +How may this ferocity be tamed? It grows too great to bear. +Let us question them and find if they'll perchance declare +The reason why they strangely dare +To seize on Cranaos' citadel, +This eyrie inaccessible, +This shrine above the precipice, +The Acropolis. +Probe them and find what they mean with this idle talk; listen, +but watch they don't try to deceive. +You'd be neglecting your duty most certainly if now this mystery +unplumbed you leave. + +MAGISTRATE + +Women there! Tell what I ask you, directly.... +Come, without rambling, I wish you to state +What's your rebellious intention in barring up thus on our noses +our own temple-gate. + +LYSISTRATA + +To take first the treasury out of your management, and so stop the war +through the absence of gold. + +MAGISTRATE + +Is gold then the cause of the war? + +LYSISTRATA + +Yes, gold caused it and miseries more, too many to be told. +'Twas for money, and money alone, that Pisander with all of the army of +mob-agitators. +Raised up revolutions. But, as for the future, it won't be worth while +to set up to be traitors. +Not an obol they'll get as their loot, not an obol! while we have the +treasure-chest in our command. + +MAGISTRATE + +What then is that you propose? + +LYSISTRATA + +Just this--merely to take the exchequer henceforth in hand. + +MAGISTRATE + +The exchequer! + +LYSISTRATA + +Yes, why not? Of our capabilities you have had various clear evidences. +Firstly remember we have always administered soundly the budget of all +home-expenses. + +MAGISTRATE + +But this matter's different. + +LYSISTRATA + +How is it different? + +MAGISTRATE + +Why, it deals chiefly with war-time supplies. + +LYSISTRATA + +But we abolish war straight by our policy. + +MAGISTRATE + +What will you do if emergencies arise? + +LYSISTRATA + +Face them our own way. + +MAGISTRATE + +What _you_ will? + +LYSISTRATA + +Yes _we_ will! + +MAGISTRATE + +Then there's no help for it; we're all destroyed. + +LYSISTRATA + +No, willy-nilly you must be safeguarded. + +MAGISTRATE + +What madness is this? + +LYSISTRATA + +Why, it seems you're annoyed. +It must be done, that's all. + +MAGISTRATE + +Such awful oppression never, +O never in the past yet I bore. + +LYSISTRATA + +You must be saved, sirrah--that's all there is to it. + +MAGISTRATE + +If we don't want to be saved? + +LYSISTRATA + +All the more. + +MAGISTRATE + +Why do you women come prying and meddling in matters of state touching +war-time and peace? + +LYSISTRATA + +That I will tell you. + +MAGISTRATE + +O tell me or quickly I'll-- + +LYSISTRATA + +Hearken awhile and from threatening cease. + +MAGISTRATE + +I cannot, I cannot; it's growing too insolent. + +WOMEN + +Come on; you've far more than we have to dread. + +MAGISTRATE + +Stop from your croaking, old carrion-crow there.... +Continue. + +LYSISTRATA + +Be calm then and I'll go ahead. +All the long years when the hopeless war dragged along we, unassuming, +forgotten in quiet, +Endured without question, endured in our loneliness all your incessant +child's antics and riot. +Our lips we kept tied, though aching with silence, though well all the +while in our silence we knew +How wretchedly everything still was progressing by listening dumbly the +day long to you. +For always at home you continued discussing the war and its politics +loudly, and we +Sometimes would ask you, our hearts deep with sorrowing though we spoke +lightly, though happy to see, +"What's to be inscribed on the side of the Treaty-stone +What, dear, was said in the Assembly today?" +"Mind your own business," he'd answer me growlingly +"hold your tongue, woman, or else go away." +And so I would hold it. + +WOMEN + +I'd not be silent for any man living on earth, no, not I! + +MAGISTRATE + +Not for a staff? + +LYSISTRATA + +Well, so I did nothing but sit in the house, feeling dreary, and sigh, +While ever arrived some fresh tale of decisions more foolish by far and +presaging disaster. +Then I would say to him, "O my dear husband, why still do they rush on +destruction the faster?" +At which he would look at me sideways, exclaiming, "Keep for your web +and your shuttle your care, +Or for some hours hence your cheeks will be sore and hot; leave this +alone, war is Man's sole affair!" + +MAGISTRATE + +By Zeus, but a man of fine sense, he. + +LYSISTRATA + +How sensible? +You dotard, because he at no time had lent +His intractable ears to absorb from our counsel one temperate word of +advice, kindly meant? +But when at the last in the streets we heard shouted (everywhere ringing +the ominous cry) +"Is there no one to help us, no saviour in Athens?" and, "No, there is +no one," come back in reply. +At once a convention of all wives through Hellas here for a serious +purpose was held, +To determine how husbands might yet back to wisdom despite their +reluctance in time be compelled. +Why then delay any longer? It's settled. For the future you'll take +up our old occupation. +Now in turn you're to hold tongue, as we did, and listen while we show +the way to recover the nation. + +MAGISTRATE + +_You_ talk to _us!_ Why, you're mad. I'll not stand it. + +LYSISTRATA + +Cease babbling, you fool; till I end, hold your tongue. + +MAGISTRATE + +If I should take orders from one who wears veils, may my +neck straightaway be deservedly wrung. + +LYSISTRATA + +O if that keeps pestering you, +I've a veil here for your hair, +I'll fit you out in everything +As is only fair. + +CALONICE + +Here's a spindle that will do. + +MYRRHINE + +I'll add a wool-basket too. + +LYSISTRATA + +Girdled now sit humbly at home, +Munching beans, while you card wool and comb. For war from now on +is the Women's affair. + +WOMEN. + +Come then, down pitchers, all, +And on, courageous of heart, +In our comradely venture +Each taking her due part. + +I could dance, dance, dance, and be fresher after, +I could dance away numberless suns, +To no weariness let my knees bend. +Earth I could brave with laughter, +Having such wonderful girls here to friend. +O the daring, the gracious, the beautiful ones! +Their courage unswerving and witty +Will rescue our city. + +O sprung from the seed of most valiant-wombed grand-mothers, +scions of savage and dangerous nettles! +Prepare for the battle, all. Gird up your angers. Our way +the wind of sweet victory settles. + +LYSISTRATA + +O tender Eros and Lady of Cyprus, some flush of beauty I +pray you devise +To flash on our bosoms and, O Aphrodite, rosily gleam on +our valorous thighs! +Joy will raise up its head through the legions warring and +all of the far-serried ranks of mad-love +Bristle the earth to the pillared horizon, pointing in vain to +the heavens above. +I think that perhaps then they'll give us our title-- +Peace-makers. + +MAGISTRATE + + What do you mean? Please explain. + +LYSISTRATA + + First, we'll not see you now flourishing arms about into the + Marketing-place clang again. + +WOMEN + No, by the Paphian. + +LYSISTRATA + +Still I can conjure them as past were the herbs stand or crockery's sold +Like Corybants jingling (poor sots) fully armoured, they noisily round +on their promenade strolled. + +MAGISTRATE + +And rightly; that's discipline, they-- + +LYSISTRATA + +But what's sillier than to go on an errand of buying a fish +Carrying along an immense. Gorgon-buckler instead the usual platter +or dish? +A phylarch I lately saw, mounted on horse-back, dressed for the part +with long ringlets and all, +Stow in his helmet the omelet bought steaming from an old woman who +kept a food-stall. +Nearby a soldier, a Thracian, was shaking wildly his spear like Tereus +in the play, +To frighten a fig-girl while unseen the ruffian filched from her +fruit-trays the ripest away. + +MAGISTRATE + +How, may I ask, will your rule re-establish order and justice in lands +so tormented? + +LYSISTRATA + +Nothing is easier. + +MAGISTRATE + +Out with it speedily--what is this plan that you boast you've invented? + +LYSISTRATA + +If, when yarn we are winding, It chances to tangle, then, as perchance you +may know, through the skein +This way and that still the spool we keep passing till it is finally clear +all again: +So to untangle the War and its errors, ambassadors out on all sides we will +send +This way and that, here, there and round about--soon you will find that the +War has an end. + +MAGISTRATE + +So with these trivial tricks of the household, domestic analogies of +threads, skeins and spools, +You think that you'll solve such a bitter complexity, unwind such political +problems, you fools! + +LYSISTRATA + +Well, first as we wash dirty wool so's to cleanse it, so with a pitiless +zeal we will scrub +Through the whole city for all greasy fellows; burrs too, the parasites, +off we will rub. +That verminous plague of insensate place-seekers soon between thumb and +forefinger we'll crack. +All who inside Athens' walls have their dwelling into one great common +basket we'll pack. +Disenfranchised or citizens, allies or aliens, pell-mell the lot of them +in we will squeeze. +Till they discover humanity's meaning.... As for disjointed and far +colonies, +Them you must never from this time imagine as scattered about just like +lost hanks of wool. +Each portion we'll take and wind in to this centre, inward to Athens +each loyalty pull, +Till from the vast heap where all's piled together at last can be woven +a strong Cloak of State. + +MAGISTRATE + +How terrible is it to stand here and watch them carding and winding at +will with our fate, +Witless in war as they are. + +LYSISTRATA + +What of us then, who ever in vain for our children must weep +Borne but to perish afar and in vain? + +MAGISTRATE + +Not that, O let that one memory sleep! + +LYSISTRATA + +Then while we should be companioned still merrily, happy as brides may, +the livelong night, +Kissing youth by, we are forced to lie single.... But leave for a moment +our pitiful plight, +It hurts even more to behold the poor maidens helpless wrinkling in +staler virginity. + +MAGISTRATE + +Does not a man age? + +LYSISTRATA + +Not in the same way. Not as a woman grows withered, grows he. +He, when returned from the war, though grey-headed, yet +if he wishes can choose out a wife. +But she has no solace save peering for omens, wretched and +lonely the rest of her life. + +MAGISTRATE + +But the old man will often select-- + +LYSISTRATA + +O why not finish and die? +A bier is easy to buy, +A honey-cake I'll knead you with joy, +This garland will see you are decked. + +CALONICE + +I've a wreath for you too. + +MYRRHINE + +I also will fillet you. + +LYSISTRATA + +What more is lacking? Step aboard the boat. +See, Charon shouts ahoy. +You're keeping him, he wants to shove afloat. + +MAGISTRATE + +Outrageous insults! Thus my place to flout! +Now to my fellow-magistrates I'll go +And what you've perpetrated on me show. + +LYSISTRATA + +Why are you blaming us for laying you out? +Assure yourself we'll not forget to make +The third day offering early for your sake. + +MAGISTRATE _retires_, LYSISTRATA _returns within_. + +OLD MEN. + +All men who call your loins your own, awake at last, arise +And strip to stand in readiness. For as it seems to me +Some more perilous offensive in their heads they now devise. +I'm sure a Tyranny +Like that of Hippias +In this I detect.... +They mean to put us under +Themselves I suspect, +And that Laconians assembling +At Cleisthenes' house have played +A trick-of-war and provoked them +Madly to raid +The Treasury, in which term I include +The Pay for my food. + +For is it not preposterous +They should talk this way to us +On a subject such as battle! + +And, women as they are, about bronze bucklers dare prattle-- +Make alliance with the Spartans--people I for one +Like very hungry wolves would always most sincere shun.... +Some dirty game is up their sleeve, +I believe. +A Tyranny, no doubt... but they won't catch me, that know. +Henceforth on my guard I'll go, +A sword with myrtle-branches wreathed for ever in my hand, +And under arms in the Public Place I'll take my watchful stand, +Shoulder to shoulder with Aristogeiton. Now my staff I'll draw +And start at once by knocking +that shocking +Hag upon the jaw. + +WOMEN. + +Your own mother will not know you when you get back to the town. +But first, my friends and allies, let us lay these garments down, +And all ye fellow-citizens, hark to me while I tell +What will aid Athens well. +Just as is right, for I +Have been a sharer +In all the lavish splendour +Of the proud city. +I bore the holy vessels +At seven, then +I pounded barley +At the age of ten, +And clad in yellow robes, +Soon after this, +I was Little Bear to +Brauronian Artemis; +Then neckletted with figs, +Grown tall and pretty, +I was a Basket-bearer, +And so it's obvious I should +Give you advice that I think good, +The very best I can. +It should not prejudice my voice that I'm not born a man, +If I say something advantageous to the present situation. +For I'm taxed too, and as a toll provide men for the nation +While, miserable greybeards, you, +It is true, +Contribute nothing of any importance whatever to our needs; +But the treasure raised against the Medes +You've squandered, and do nothing in return, save that you make +Our lives and persons hazardous by some imbecile mistakes +What can you answer? Now be careful, don't arouse my spite, +Or with my slipper I'll take you napping, +faces slapping +Left and right. + +MEN. + +What villainies they contrive! +Come, let vengeance fall, +You that below the waist are still alive, +Off with your tunics at my call-- +Naked, all. +For a man must strip to battle like a man. +No quaking, brave steps taking, careless what's ahead, white shoed, +in the nude, onward bold, +All ye who garrisoned Leipsidrion of old.... +Let each one wag +As youthfully as he can, +And if he has the cause at heart +Rise at least a span. + +We must take a stand and keep to it, +For if we yield the smallest bit +To their importunity. +Then nowhere from their inroads will be left to us immunity. +But they'll be building ships and soon their navies will attack us, +As Artemisia did, and seek to fight us and to sack us. +And if they mount, the Knights they'll rob +Of a job, +For everyone knows how talented they all are in the saddle, +Having long practised how to straddle; +No matter how they're jogged there up and down, they're never thrown. +Then think of Myron's painting, and each horse-backed Amazon +In combat hand-to-hand with men.... Come, on these women fall, +And in pierced wood-collars let's stick +quick +The necks of one and all. + +WOMEN. + +Don't cross me or I'll loose +The Beast that's kennelled here.... +And soon you will be howling for a truce, +Howling out with fear. +But my dear, +Strip also, that women may battle unhindered.... +But you, you'll be too sore to eat garlic more, or one black bean, +I really mean, so great's my spleen, to kick you black and blue +With these my dangerous legs. +I'll hatch the lot of you, +If my rage you dash on, +The way the relentless Beetle +Hatched the Eagle's eggs. + +Scornfully aside I set +Every silly old-man threat +While Lampito's with me. +Or dear Ismenia, the noble Theban girl. Then let decree +Be hotly piled upon decree; in vain will be your labours, +You futile rogue abominated by your suffering neighbour +To Hecate's feast I yesterday went-- +Off I sent +To our neighbours in Boeotia, asking as a gift to me +For them to pack immediately +That darling dainty thing ... a good fat eel [1] I meant of course; + +[Footnote 1:_Vide supra_, p. 23.] + +But they refused because some idiotic old decree's in force. +O this strange passion for decrees nothing on earth can check, +Till someone puts a foot out tripping you, +and slipping you +Break your neck. + +LYSISTRATA _enters in dismay_. + +WOMEN + +Dear Mistress of our martial enterprise, +Why do you come with sorrow in your eyes? + +LYSISTRATA + +O 'tis our naughty femininity, +So weak in one spot, that hath saddened me. + +WOMEN + +What's this? Please speak. + +LYSISTRATA + +Poor women, O so weak! + +WOMEN + +What can it be? Surely your friends may know. + +LYSISTRATA + +Yea, I must speak it though it hurt me so. + +WOMEN + +Speak; can we help? Don't stand there mute in need. + +LYSISTRATA + +I'll blurt it out then--our women's army's mutinied. + +WOMEN + +O Zeus! + +LYSISTRATA + +What use is Zeus to our anatomy? +Here is the gaping calamity I meant: +I cannot shut their ravenous appetites +A moment more now. They are all deserting. +The first I caught was sidling through the postern +Close by the Cave of Pan: the next hoisting herself +With rope and pulley down: a third on the point +Of slipping past: while a fourth malcontent, seated +For instant flight to visit Orsilochus +On bird-back, I dragged off by the hair in time.... +They are all snatching excuses to sneak home. +Look, there goes one.... Hey, what's the hurry? + +1ST WOMAN + +I must get home. I've some Milesian wool +Packed wasting away, and moths are pushing through it. + +LYSISTRATA + +Fine moths indeed, I know. Get back within. + +1ST WOMAN + +By the Goddesses, I'll return instantly. +I only want to stretch it on my bed. + +LYSISTRATA + +You shall stretch nothing and go nowhere either. + +1ST WOMAN + +Must I never use my wool then? + +LYSISTRATA + +If needs be. + +2ND WOMAN + +How unfortunate I am! O my poor flax! +It's left at home unstript. + +LYSISTRATA + +So here's another +That wishes to go home and strip her flax. +Inside again! + +2ND WOMAN + +No, by the Goddess of Light, +I'll be back as soon as I have flayed it properly. + +LYSISTRATA + +You'll not flay anything. For if you begin +There'll not be one here but has a patch to be flayed. + +3RD WOMAN + +O holy Eilithyia, stay this birth +Till I have left the precincts of the place! + +LYSISTRATA + +What nonsense is this? + +3RD WOMAN + +I'll drop it any minute. + +LYSISTRATA + +Yesterday you weren't with child. + +3RD WOMAN + +But I am today. +O let me find a midwife, Lysistrata. +O quickly! + +LYSISTRATA + +Now what story is this you tell? +What is this hard lump here? + +3RD WOMAN + +It's a male child. + +LYSISTRATA + +By Aphrodite, it isn't. Your belly's hollow, +And it has the feel of metal.... Well, I soon can see. +You hussy, it's Athene's sacred helm, +And you said you were with child. + +3RD WOMAN + +And so I am. + +LYSISTRATA + +Then why the helm? + +3RD WOMAN + +So if the throes should take me +Still in these grounds I could use it like a dove +As a laying-nest in which to drop the child. + +LYSISTRATA + +More pretexts! You can't hide your clear intent, +And anyway why not wait till the tenth day +Meditating a brazen name for your brass brat? + +WOMAN + +And I can't sleep a wink. My nerve is gone +Since I saw that snake-sentinel of the shrine. + +WOMAN + +And all those dreadful owls with their weird hooting! +Though I'm wearied out, I can't close an eye. + +LYSISTRATA + +You wicked women, cease from juggling lies. +You want your men. But what of them as well? +They toss as sleepless in the lonely night, +I'm sure of it. Hold out awhile, hold out, +But persevere a teeny-weeny longer. +An oracle has promised Victory +If we don't wrangle. Would you hear the words? + +WOMEN + +Yes, yes, what is it? + +LYSISTRATA + +Silence then, you chatterboxes. +Here-- +_Whenas the swallows flocking in one place from the hoopoes +Deny themselves love's gambols any more, +All woes shall then have ending and great Zeus the Thunderer +Shall put above what was below before._ + +WOMEN + +Will the men then always be kept under us? + +LYSISTRATA +_But if the swallows squabble among themselves and fly away +Out of the temple, refusing to agree, +Then The Most Wanton Birds in all the World +They shall be named for ever. That's his decree._ + +WOMAN + +It's obvious what it means. + +LYSISTRATA + + Now by all the gods +We must let no agony deter from duty, +Back to your quarters. For we are base indeed, +My friends, if we betray the oracle. + +_She goes out._ + + +OLD MEN. + +I'd like to remind you of a fable they used to employ, +When I was a little boy: +How once through fear of the marriage-bed a young man, +Melanion by name, to the wilderness ran, +And there on the hills he dwelt. +For hares he wove a net +Which with his dog he set-- +Most likely he's there yet. +For he never came back home, so great was the fear he felt. +I loathe the sex as much as he, +And therefore I no less shall be +As chaste as was Melanion. + +MAN + +Grann'am, do you much mind men? + +WOMAN + +Onions you won't need, to cry. + +MAN + +From my foot you shan't escape. + +WOMAN + +What thick forests I espy. + +MEN + +So much Myronides' fierce beard +And thundering black back were feared, +That the foe fled when they were shown-- +Brave he as Phormion. + +WOMEN. + +Well, I'll relate a rival fable just to show to you +A different point of view: +There was a rough-hewn fellow, Timon, with a face +That glowered as through a thorn-bush in a wild, bleak place. +He too decided on flight, +This very Furies' son, +All the world's ways to shun +And hide from everyone, +Spitting out curses on all knavish men to left and right. +But though he reared this hate for men, +He loved the women even then, +And never thought them enemies. + +WOMAN + +O your jaw I'd like to break. + +MAN + +That I fear do you suppose? + +WOMAN + +Learn what kicks my legs can make. + +MAN + +Raise them up, and you'll expose-- + +WOMAN + +Nay, you'll see there, I engage, +All is well kept despite my age, +And tended smooth enough to slip +From any adversary's grip. + +LYSISTRATA _appears_. + +LYSISTRATA + +Hollo there, hasten hither to me +Skip fast along. + +WOMAN + +What is this? Why the noise? + +LYSISTRATA + +A man, a man! I spy a frenzied man! +He carries Love upon him like a staff. +O Lady of Cyprus, and Cythera, and Paphos, +I beseech you, keep our minds and hands to the oath. + +WOMAN + +Where is he, whoever he is? + +LYSISTRATA + +By the Temple of Chloe. + +WOMAN + +Yes, now I see him, but who can he be? + +LYSISTRATA + +Look at him. Does anyone recognise his face? + +MYRRHINE + +I do. He is my husband, Cinesias. + +LYSISTRATA + +You know how to work. Play with him, lead him on, +Seduce him to the cozening-point--kiss him, kiss him, +Then slip your mouth aside just as he's sure of it, +Ungirdle every caress his mouth feels at +Save that the oath upon the bowl has locked. + +MYRRHINE + +You can rely on me. + +LYSISTRATA + +I'll stay here to help +In working up his ardor to its height +Of vain magnificence.... The rest to their quarters. + +_Enter_ CINESIAS. + +Who is this that stands within our lines? + +CINESIAS + +I. + +LYSISTRATA + +A man? + +CINESIAS + +Too much a man! + +LYSISTRATA + +Then be off at once. + +CINESIAS + +Who are you that thus eject me? + +LYSISTRATA + +Guard for the day. + +CINESIAS + +By all the gods, then call Myrrhine hither. + +LYSISTRATA + +So, call Myrrhine hither! Who are you? + +CINESIAS + +I am her husband Cinesias, son of Anthros. + +LYSISTRATA + +Welcome, dear friend! That glorious name of yours +Is quite familiar in our ranks. Your wife +Continually has it in her mouth. +She cannot touch an apple or an egg +But she must say, "This to Cinesias!" + +CINESIAS + +O is that true? + +LYSISTRATA + +By Aphrodite, it is. +If the conversation strikes on men, your wife +Cuts in with, "All are boobies by Cinesias." + +CINESIAS + +Then call her here. + +LYSISTRATA + +And what am I to get? + +CINESIAS + +This, if you want it.... See, what I have here. +But not to take away. + +LYSISTRATA + +Then I'll call her. + +CINESIAS + +Be quick, be quick. All grace is wiped from life +Since she went away. O sad, sad am I +When there I enter on that loneliness, +And wine is unvintaged of the sun's flavour. +And food is tasteless. But I've put on weight. + +MYRRHINE (_above_) + +I love him O so much! but he won't have it. +Don't call me down to him. + +CINESIAS + +Sweet little Myrrhine! +What do you mean? Come here. + +MYRRHINE + +O no I won't. +Why are you calling me? You don't want me. + +CINESIAS + +Not want you! with this week-old strength of love. + +MYRRHINE + +Farewell. + +CINESIAS + +Don't go, please don't go, Myrrhine. +At least you'll hear our child. Call your mother, lad. + +CHILD + +Mummy ... mummy ... mummy! + +CINESIAS + +There now, don't you feel pity for the child? +He's not been fed or washed now for six days. + +MYRRHINE + +I certainly pity him with so heartless a father. + +CINESIAS + +Come down, my sweetest, come for the child's sake. + +MYRRHINE + +A trying life it is to be a mother! +I suppose I'd better go. _She comes down._ + +CINESIAS + +How much younger she looks, +How fresher and how prettier! Myrrhine, +Lift up your lovely face, your disdainful face; +And your ankle ... let your scorn step out its worst; +It only rubs me to more ardor here. + +MYRRHINE (_playing with the child_) + +You're as innocent as he's iniquitous. +Let me kiss you, honey-petting, mother's darling. + +CINESIAS + +How wrong to follow other women's counsel +And let loose all these throbbing voids in yourself +As well as in me. Don't you go throb-throb? + +MYRRHINE + +Take away your hands. + +CINESIAS + +Everything in the house +Is being ruined. + +MYRRHINE + +I don't care at all. + +CINESIAS + +The roosters are picking all your web to rags. +Do you mind that? + +MYRRHINE + +Not I. + +CINESIAS + +What time we've wasted +We might have drenched with Paphian laughter, flung +On Aphrodite's Mysteries. O come here. + +MYRRHINE + +Not till a treaty finishes the war. + +CINESIAS + +If you must have it, then we'll get it done. + +MYRRHINE + +Do it and I'll come home. Till then I am bound. + +CINESIAS + +Well, can't your oath perhaps be got around? + +MYRRHINE + +No ... no ... still I'll not say that I don't love you. + +CINESIAS + +You love me! Then dear girl, let me also love you. + +MYRRHINE + +You must be joking. The boy's looking on. + +CINESIAS + +Here, Manes, take the child home!... There, he's gone. +There's nothing in the way now. Come to the point. + +MYRRHINE + +Here in the open! In plain sight? + +CINESIAS + +In Pan's cave. +A splendid place. + +MYRRHINE + +Where shall I dress my hair again +Before returning to the citadel? + +CINESIAS + +You can easily primp yourself in the Clepsydra. + +MYRRHINE + +But how can I break my oath? + +CINESIAS + +Leave that to me, +I'll take all risk. + +MYRRHINE + +Well, I'll make you comfortable. + +CINESIAS + +Don't worry. I'd as soon lie on the grass. + +MYRRHINE + +No, by Apollo, in spite of all your faults +I won't have you lying on the nasty earth. +(_From here MYRRHINE keeps on going off to fetch things._) + +CINESIAS + +Ah, how she loves me. + +MYRRHINE + +Rest there on the bench, +While I arrange my clothes. O what a nuisance, +I must find some cushions first. + +CINESIAS + +Why some cushions? +Please don't get them! + +MYRRHINE + +What? The plain, hard wood? +Never, by Artemis! That would be too vulgar. + +CINESIAS + +Open your arms! + +MYRRHINE + +No. Wait a second. + +CINESIAS + +O.... +Then hurry back again. + +MYRRHINE + +Here the cushions are. +Lie down while I--O dear! But what a shame, +You need more pillows. + +CINESIAS + +I don't want them, dear. + +MYRRHINE + +But I do. + +CINESIAS + +Thwarted affection mine, +They treat you just like Heracles at a feast +With cheats of dainties, O disappointing arms! + +MYRRHINE + +Raise up your head. + +CINESIAS + +There, that's everything at last. + +MYRRHINE + +Yes, all. + +CINESIAS + +Then run to my arms, you golden girl. + +MYRRHINE + +I'm loosening my girdle now. But you've not forgotten? +You're not deceiving me about the Treaty? + +CINESIAS + +No, by my life, I'm not. + +MYRRHINE + +Why, you've no blanket. + +CINESIAS + +It's not the silly blanket's warmth but yours I want. + +MYRRHINE + +Never mind. You'll soon have both. I'll come straight back. + +CINESIAS + +The woman will choke me with her coverlets. + +MYRRHINE + +Get up a moment. + +CINESIAS + +I'm up high enough. + +MYRRHINE + +Would you like me to perfume you? + +CINESIAS + +By Apollo, no! + +MYRRHINE + +By Aphrodite, I'll do it anyway. + +CINESIAS + +Lord Zeus, may she soon use up all the myrrh. + +MYRRHINE + +Stretch out your hand. Take it and rub it in. + +CINESIAS + +Hmm, it's not as fragrant as might be; that is, +Not before it's smeared. It doesn't smell of kisses. + +MYRRHINE + +How silly I am: I've brought you Rhodian scents. + +CINESIAS + +It's good enough, leave it, love. + +MYRRHINE + +You must be jesting. + +CINESIAS + +Plague rack the man who first compounded scent! + +MYRRHINE + +Here, take this flask. + +CINESIAS + +I've a far better one. +Don't tease me, come here, and get nothing more. + +MYRRHINE + +I'm coming.... I'm just drawing off my shoes.... +You're sure you will vote for Peace? + +CINESIAS + +I'll think about it. +_She runs off._ +I'm dead: the woman's worn me all away. +She's gone and left me with an anguished pulse. + +MEN + +Baulked in your amorous delight +How melancholy is your plight. +With sympathy your case I view; +For I am sure it's hard on you. +What human being could sustain +This unforeseen domestic strain, +And not a single trace +Of willing women in the place! + +CINESIAS + +O Zeus, what throbbing suffering! + +MEN + +She did it all, the harlot, she +With her atrocious harlotry. + +WOMEN + +Nay, rather call her darling-sweet. + +MEN + +What, sweet? She's a rude, wicked thing. + +CINESIAS + +A wicked thing, as I repeat. +O Zeus, O Zeus, +Canst Thou not suddenly let loose +Some twirling hurricane to tear +Her flapping up along the air +And drop her, when she's whirled around, +Here to the ground +Neatly impaled upon the stake +That's ready upright for her sake. +_He goes out._ + +_Enter_ SPARTAN HERALD. + +_The_ MAGISTRATE _comes forward_. + +HERALD + +What here gabs the Senate an' the Prytanes? +I've fetcht despatches for them. + +MAGISTRATE + +Are you a man +Or a monstrosity? + +HERALD + +My scrimp-brained lad, +I'm a herald, as ye see, who hae come frae Sparta +Anent a Peace. + +MAGISTRATE + +Then why do you hide that lance +That sticks out under your arms? + +HERALD. + +I've brought no lance. + +MAGISTRATE + +Then why do you turn aside and hold your cloak +So far out from your body? Is your groin swollen +With stress of travelling? + +HERALD + +By Castor, I'll swear +The man is wud. + +MAGISTRATE + +Indeed, your cloak is wide, +My rascal fellow. + +HERALD + +But I tell ye No! +Enow o' fleering! + +MAGISTRATE + +Well, what is it then? + +HERALD + +It's my despatch cane. + +MAGISTRATE + +Of course--a Spartan cane! +But speak right out. I know all this too well. +Are new privations springing up in Sparta? + +HERALD + +Och, hard as could be: in lofty lusty columns +Our allies stand united. We maun get Pellene. + +MAGISTRATE + +Whence has this evil come? Is it from Pan? + +HERALD + +No. Lampito first ran asklent, then the others +Sprinted after her example, and blocked, the hizzies, +Their wames unskaithed against our every fleech. + +MAGISTRATE + +What did you do? + +HERALD + +We are broken, and bent double, +Limp like men carrying lanthorns in great winds +About the city. They winna let us even +Wi' lightest neif skim their primsie pretties +Till we've concluded Peace-terms wi' a' Hellas. + +MAGISTRATE + +So the conspiracy is universal; +This proves it. Then return to Sparta. Bid them +Send envoys with full powers to treat of Peace; +And I will urge the Senate here to choose +Plenipotentiary ambassadors, +As argument adducing this connection. + +HERALD + +I'm off. Your wisdom none could contravert. +_They retire._ + +MEN + +There is no beast, no rush of fire, like woman so untamed. +She calmly goes her way where even panthers would be shamed. + +WOMEN + +And yet you are fool enough, it seems, to dare to war with me, +When for your faithful ally you might win me easily. + +MEN + +Never could the hate I feel for womankind grow less. + +WOMEN + +Then have your will. But I'll take pity on your nakedness. +For I can see just how ridiculous you look, and so +Will help you with your tunic if close up I now may go. + +MEN + +Well, that, by Zeus, is no scoundrel-deed, I frankly will admit. +I only took them off myself in a scoundrel raging-fit. + +WOMEN + +Now you look sensible, and that you're men no one could doubt. +If you were but good friends again, I'd take the insect out +That hurts your eye. + +MEN + +Is that what's wrong? That nasty bitie thing. +Please squeeze it out, and show me what it is that makes this sting. +It's been paining me a long while now. + +WOMEN + +Well I'll agree to that, +Although you're most unmannerly. O what a giant gnat. +Here, look! It comes from marshy Tricorysus, I can tell. + +MEN + +O thank you. It was digging out a veritable well. +Now that it's gone, I can't hold back my tears. See how they fall. + +WOMEN + +I'll wipe them off, bad as you are, and kiss you after all. + +MEN + +I won't be kissed. + +WOMEN + +O yes, you will. Your wishes do not matter. + +MEN + +O botheration take you all! How you cajole and flatter. +A hell it is to live with you; to live without, a hell: +How truly was that said. But come, these enmities let's quell. +You stop from giving orders and I'll stop from doing wrong. +So let's join ranks and seal our bargain with a choric song. + +CHORUS. + +Athenians, it's not our intention +To sow political dissension +By giving any scandal mention; +But on the contrary to promote good feeling in the state +By word and deed. We've had enough calamities of late. +So let a man or woman but divulge +They need a trifle, say, +Two minas, three or four, +I've purses here that bulge. +There's only one condition made +(Indulge my whim in this I pray)-- +When Peace is signed once more, +On no account am I to be repaid. + +And I'm making preparation +For a gay select collation +With some youths of reputation. +I've managed to produce some soup and they're slaughtering for me +A sucking-pig: its flesh should taste as tender as could be. +I shall expect you at my house today. +To the baths make an early visit, +And bring your children along; +Don't dawdle on the way. +Ask no one; enter as if the place +Was all your own--yours henceforth is it. +If nothing chances wrong, +The door will then be shut bang in your face. + +_The_ SPARTAN AMBASSADORS _approach_. + +CHORUS + +Here come the Spartan envoys with long, worried beards. +Hail, Spartans how do you fare? +Did anything new arise? + +SPARTANS + +No need for a clutter o' words. Do ye see our condition? + +CHORUS + +The situation swells to greater tension. +Something will explode soon. + +SPARTANS + +It's awfu' truly. +But come, let us wi' the best speed we may +Scribble a Peace. + +CHORUS + +I notice that our men +Like wrestlers poised for contest, hold their clothes +Out from their bellies. An athlete's malady! +Since exercise alone can bring relief. + +ATHENIANS + +Can anyone tell us where Lysistrata is? +There is no need to describe our men's condition, +It shows up plainly enough. + +CHORUS + +It's the same disease. +Do you feel a jerking throbbing in the morning? + +ATHENIANS + +By Zeus, yes! In these straits, I'm racked all through. +Unless Peace is soon declared, we shall be driven +In the void of women to try Cleisthenes. + +CHORUS + +Be wise and cover those things with your tunics. +Who knows what kind of person may perceive you? + +ATHENIANS + +By Zeus, you're right. + +SPARTANS + +By the Twa Goddesses, +Indeed ye are. Let's put our tunics on. + +ATHENIANS + +Hail O my fellow-sufferers, hail Spartans. + +SPARTANS + +O hinnie darling, what a waefu' thing! +If they had seen us wi' our lunging waddies! + +ATHENIANS + +Tell us then, Spartans, what has brought you here? + +SPARTANS + +We come to treat o' Peace. + +ATHENIANS + +Well spoken there! +And we the same. Let us callout Lysistrata +Since she alone can settle the Peace-terms. + +SPARTANS + +Callout Lysistratus too if ye don't mind. + +CHORUS + +No indeed. She hears your voices and she comes. + +_Enter LYSISTRATA_ + +Hail, Wonder of all women! Now you must be in turn +Hard, shifting, clear, deceitful, noble, crafty, sweet, and stern. +The foremost men of Hellas, smitten by your fascination, +Have brought their tangled quarrels here for your sole arbitration. + +LYSISTRATA + +An easy task if the love's raging home-sickness +Doesn't start trying out how well each other +Will serve instead of us. But I'll know at once +If they do. O where's that girl, Reconciliation? +Bring first before me the Spartan delegates, +And see you lift no rude or violent hands-- +None of the churlish ways our husbands used. +But lead them courteously, as women should. +And if they grudge fingers, guide them by other methods, +And introduce them with ready tact. The Athenians +Draw by whatever offers you a grip. +Now, Spartans, stay here facing me. Here you, +Athenians. Both hearken to my words. +I am a woman, but I'm not a fool. +And what of natural intelligence I own +Has been filled out with the remembered precepts +My father and the city-elders taught me. +First I reproach you both sides equally +That when at Pylae and Olympia, +At Pytho and the many other shrines +That I could name, you sprinkle from one cup +The altars common to all Hellenes, yet +You wrack Hellenic cities, bloody Hellas +With deaths of her own sons, while yonder clangs +The gathering menace of barbarians. + +ATHENIANS + +We cannot hold it in much longer now. + +LYSISTRATA + +Now unto you, O Spartans, do I speak. +Do you forget how your own countryman, +Pericleidas, once came hither suppliant +Before our altars, pale in his purple robes, +Praying for an army when in Messenia +Danger growled, and the Sea-god made earth quaver. +Then with four thousand hoplites Cimon marched +And saved all Sparta. Yet base ingrates now, +You are ravaging the soil of your preservers. + +ATHENIANS + +By Zeus, they do great wrong, Lysistrata. + +SPARTANS + +Great wrong, indeed. O! What a luscious wench! + +LYSISTRATA + +And now I turn to the Athenians. +Have you forgotten too how once the Spartans +In days when you wore slavish tunics, came +And with their spears broke a Thessalian host +And all the partisans of Hippias? +They alone stood by your shoulder on that day. +They freed you, so that for the slave's short skirt +You should wear the trailing cloak of liberty. + +SPARTANS + +I've never seen a nobler woman anywhere. + +ATHENIANS + +Nor I one with such prettily jointing hips. + +LYSISTRATA + +Now, brethren twined with mutual benefactions, +Can you still war, can you suffer such disgrace? +Why not be friends? What is there to prevent you? + +SPARTANS + +We're agreed, gin that we get this tempting Mole. + +LYSISTRATA + +Which one? + +SPARTANS + +That ane we've wanted to get into, +O for sae lang.... Pylos, of course. + +ATHENIANS + +By Poseidon, +Never! + +LYSISTRATA + +Give it up. + +ATHENIANS + +Then what will we do? +We need that ticklish place united to us-- + +LYSISTRATA + +Ask for some other lurking-hole in return. + +ATHENIANS + +Then, ah, we'll choose this snug thing here, Echinus, +Shall we call the nestling spot? And this backside haven, +These desirable twin promontories, the Maliac, +And then of course these Megarean Legs. + +SPARTANS + +Not that, O surely not that, never that. + +LYSISTRATA + +Agree! Now what are two legs more or less? + +ATHENIANS + +I want to strip at once and plough my land. + +SPARTANS + +And mine I want to fertilize at once. + +LYSISTRATA + +And so you can, when Peace is once declared. +If you mean it, get your allies' heads together +And come to some decision. + +ATHENIANS + +What allies? +There's no distinction in our politics: +We've risen as one man to this conclusion; +Every ally is jumping-mad to drive it home. + +SPARTANS + +And ours the same, for sure. + +ATHENIANS + +The Carystians first! +I'll bet on that. + +LYSISTRATA + +I agree with all of you. +Now off, and cleanse yourselves for the Acropolis, +For we invite you all in to a supper +From our commissariat baskets. There at table +You will pledge good behaviour and uprightness; +Then each man's wife is his to hustle home. + +ATHENIANS + +Come, as quickly as possible. + +SPARTANS + +As quick as ye like. +Lead on. + +ATHENIANS + +O Zeus, quick, quick, lead quickly on. +_They hurry off._ + +CHORUS. + +Broidered stuffs on high I'm heaping, +Fashionable cloaks and sweeping +Trains, not even gold gawds keeping. +Take them all, I pray you, take them all (I do not care) +And deck your children--your daughter, if the Basket she's to bear. +Come, everyone of you, come in and take +Of this rich hoard a share. +Nought's tied so skilfully +But you its seal can break +And plunder all you spy inside. +I've laid out all that I can spare, +And therefore you will see +Nothing unless than I you're sharper-eyed. +If lacking corn a man should be +While his slaves clamour hungrily +And his excessive progeny, +Then I've a handfull of grain at home which is always to be had, +And to which in fact a more-than-life-size loaf I'd gladly add. +Then let the poor bring with them bag or sack +And take this store of food. +Manes, my man, I'll tell +To help them all to pack +Their wallets full. But O take care. +I had forgotten; don't intrude, +Or terrified you'll yell. +My dog is hungry too, and bites--beware! + +Some _LOUNGERS_ from the Market with torches approach +the Banqueting hall. The _PORTER_ bars their entrance. + +1ST MARKET-LOUNGER + +Open the door. + +PORTER + +Here move along. + +1ST MARKET-LOUNGER + +What's this? +You're sitting down. Shall I singe you with my torch? +That's vulgar! O I couldn't do it ... yet +If it would gratify the audience, +I'll mortify myself. + +2ND MARKET-LOUNGER + +And I will too. +We'll both be crude and vulgar, yes we will. + +PORTER + +Be off at once now or you'll be wailing +Dirges for your hair. Get off at once, +And see you don't disturb the Spartan envoys +Just coming out from the splendid feast they've had. + +_The banqueters begin to come out._ + +1ST ATHENIAN + +I've never known such a pleasant banquet before, +And what delightful fellows the Spartans are. +When we are warm with wine, how wise we grow. + +2ND ATHENIAN + +That's only fair, since sober we're such fools: +This is the advice I'd give the Athenians-- +See our ambassadors are always drunk. +For when we visit Sparta sober, then +We're on the alert for trickery all the while +So that we miss half of the things they say, +And misinterpret things that were never said, +And then report the muddle back to Athens. +But now we're charmed with each other. They might cap +With the Telamon-catch instead of the Cleitagora, +And we'd applaud and praise them just the same; +We're not too scrupulous in weighing words. + +PORTER + +Why, here the rascals come again to plague me. +Won't you move on, you sorry loafers there! + +MARKET-LOUNGER + +Yes, by Zeus, they're already coming out. + +SPARTANS + +Now hinnie dearest, please tak' up your pipe +That I may try a spring an' sing my best +In honour o' the Athenians an' oursels. + +ATHENIANS + +Aye, take your pipe. By all the gods, there's nothing +Could glad my heart more than to watch you dance. + +SPARTANS. + +Mnemosyne, +Let thy fire storm these younkers, +O tongue wi' stormy ecstasy +My Muse that knows +Our deeds and theirs, how when at sea +Their navies swooped upon +The Medes at Artemision-- +Gods for their courage, did they strike +Wrenching a triumph frae their foes; +While at Thermopylae +Leonidas' army stood: wild-boars they were like +Wild-boars that wi' fierce threat +Their terrible tusks whet; +The sweat ran streaming down each twisted face, +Faen blossoming i' strange petals o' death +Panted frae mortal breath, +The sweat drenched a' their bodies i' that place, +For the hurly-burly o' Persians glittered more +Than the sands on the shore. + +Come, Hunting Girl, an' hear my prayer-- +You whose arrows whizz in woodlands, come an' bless +This Peace we swear. +Let us be fenced wi' age long amity, +O let this bond stick ever firm through thee +In friendly happiness. +Henceforth no guilefu' perjury be seen! +O hither, hither O +Thou wildwood queen. + +LYSISTRATA + +Earth is delighted now, peace is the voice of earth. +Spartans, sort out your wives: Athenians, yours. +Let each catch hands with his wife and dance his joy, +Dance out his thanks, be grateful in music, +And promise reformation with his heels. + +ATHENIANS. + +O Dancers, forward. Lead out the Graces, +Call Artemis out; +Then her brother, the Dancer of Skies, +That gracious Apollo. +Invoke with a shout +Dionysus out of whose eyes +Breaks fire on the maenads that follow; +And Zeus with his flares of quick lightning, and call, +Happy Hera, Queen of all, +And all the Daimons summon hither to be +Witnesses of our revelry +And of the noble Peace we have made, +Aphrodite our aid. +Io Paieon, Io, cry-- +For victory, leap! +Attained by me, leap! +Euoi Euoi Euai Euai. + +SPARTANS + +Piper, gie us the music for a new sang. + +SPARTANS. + +Leaving again lovely lofty Taygetus +Hither O Spartan Muse, hither to greet us, +And wi' our choric voice to raise +To Amyclean Apollo praise, +And Tyndareus' gallant sons whose days +Alang Eurotas' banks merrily pass, +An' Athene o' the House o' Brass. + +Now the dance begin; +Dance, making swirl your fringe o' woolly skin, +While we join voices +To hymn dear Sparta that rejoices +I' a beautifu' sang, +An' loves to see +Dancers tangled beautifully; +For the girls i' tumbled ranks +Alang Eurotas' banks +Like wanton fillies thrang, +Frolicking there +An' like Bacchantes shaking the wild air +To comb a giddy laughter through the hair, +Bacchantes that clench thyrsi as they sweep +To the ecstatic leap. + +An' Helen, Child o' Leda, come +Thou holy, nimble, gracefu' Queen, +Lead thou the dance, gather thy joyous tresses up i' bands +An' play like a fawn. To madden them, clap thy hands, +And sing praise to the warrior goddess templed i' our lands, +Her o' the House o' Brass. + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Lysistrata, by Aristophanes + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK LYSISTRATA *** + +***** This file should be named 7700.txt or 7700.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/7/7/0/7700/ + +Produced by Ted Garvin, David Widger and the Distributed +Proofreaders Team + + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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