diff options
Diffstat (limited to 'old/tsots10.txt')
| -rw-r--r-- | old/tsots10.txt | 6478 |
1 files changed, 0 insertions, 6478 deletions
diff --git a/old/tsots10.txt b/old/tsots10.txt deleted file mode 100644 index 7a3dd1d..0000000 --- a/old/tsots10.txt +++ /dev/null @@ -1,6478 +0,0 @@ -Project Gutenberg's Etext of The Story of the Treasure Seekers -by E. Nesbit - - - -Copyright laws are changing all over the world, be sure to check -the copyright laws for your country before posting these files!! - -Please take a look at the important information in this header. -We encourage you to keep this file on your own disk, keeping an -electronic path open for the next readers. Do not remove this. - - -**Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** - -**Etexts Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** - -*These Etexts Prepared By Hundreds of Volunteers and Donations* - -Information on contacting Project Gutenberg to get Etexts, and -further information is included below. We need your donations. - - -The Story of the Treasure Seekers - -by E. Nesbit - -January, 1997 [Etext #770] - - - -Project Gutenberg's Etext of The Story of the Treasure Seekers -*****This file should be named tsots10.txt or tsots10.zip***** - -Corrected EDITIONS of our etexts get a new NUMBER, tsots11.txt. -VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, tsots10a.txt. - - -This etext was created by Jo Churcher, Scarborough, Ontario -(jchurche@io.org) - - -We are now trying to release all our books one month in advance -of the official release dates, for time for better editing. - -Please note: neither this list nor its contents are final till -midnight of the last day of the month of any such announcement. -The official release date of all Project Gutenberg Etexts is at -Midnight, Central Time, of the last day of the stated month. A -preliminary version may often be posted for suggestion, comment -and editing by those who wish to do so. To be sure you have an -up to date first edition [xxxxx10x.xxx] please check file sizes -in the first week of the next month. Since our ftp program has -a bug in it that scrambles the date [tried to fix and failed] a -look at the file size will have to do, but we will try to see a -new copy has at least one byte more or less. - -Information about Project Gutenberg (one page) - -We produce about two million dollars for each hour we work. The -fifty hours is one conservative estimate for how long it we take -to get any etext selected, entered, proofread, edited, copyright -searched and analyzed, the copyright letters written, etc. This -projected audience is one hundred million readers. If our value -per text is nominally estimated at one dollar then we produce $2 -million dollars per hour this year as we release thirty-two text -files per month: or 400 more Etexts in 1996 for a total of 800. -If these reach just 10% of the computerized population, then the -total should reach 80 billion Etexts. - -The Goal of Project Gutenberg is to Give Away One Trillion Etext -Files by the December 31, 2001. [10,000 x 100,000,000=Trillion] -This is ten thousand titles each to one hundred million readers, -which is only 10% of the present number of computer users. 2001 -should have at least twice as many computer users as that, so it -will require us reaching less than 5% of the users in 2001. - - -We need your donations more than ever! - - -All donations should be made to "Project Gutenberg/BU": and are -tax deductible to the extent allowable by law. (BU = Benedictine -University). (Subscriptions to our paper newsletter go to BU.) - -For these and other matters, please mail to: - -Project Gutenberg -P. O. Box 2782 -Champaign, IL 61825 - -When all other email fails try our Executive Director: -Michael S. Hart <hart@pobox.com> - -We would prefer to send you this information by email -(Internet, Bitnet, Compuserve, ATTMAIL or MCImail). - -****** -If you have an FTP program (or emulator), please -FTP directly to the Project Gutenberg archives: -[Mac users, do NOT point and click. . .type] - -ftp uiarchive.cso.uiuc.edu -login: anonymous -password: your@login -cd etext/etext90 through /etext96 -or cd etext/articles [get suggest gut for more information] -dir [to see files] -get or mget [to get files. . .set bin for zip files] -GET INDEX?00.GUT -for a list of books -and -GET NEW GUT for general information -and -MGET GUT* for newsletters. - -**Information prepared by the Project Gutenberg legal advisor** -(Three Pages) - - -***START**THE SMALL PRINT!**FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS**START*** -Why is this "Small Print!" statement here? You know: lawyers. -They tell us you might sue us if there is something wrong with -your copy of this etext, even if you got it for free from -someone other than us, and even if what's wrong is not our -fault. So, among other things, this "Small Print!" statement -disclaims most of our liability to you. It also tells you how -you can distribute copies of this etext if you want to. - -*BEFORE!* YOU USE OR READ THIS ETEXT -By using or reading any part of this PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm -etext, you indicate that you understand, agree to and accept -this "Small Print!" statement. If you do not, you can receive -a refund of the money (if any) you paid for this etext by -sending a request within 30 days of receiving it to the person -you got it from. If you received this etext on a physical -medium (such as a disk), you must return it with your request. - -ABOUT PROJECT GUTENBERG-TM ETEXTS -This PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext, like most PROJECT GUTENBERG- -tm etexts, is a "public domain" work distributed by Professor -Michael S. Hart through the Project Gutenberg Association at -Benedictine University (the "Project"). Among other -things, this means that no one owns a United States copyright -on or for this work, so the Project (and you!) can copy and -distribute it in the United States without permission and -without paying copyright royalties. Special rules, set forth -below, apply if you wish to copy and distribute this etext -under the Project's "PROJECT GUTENBERG" trademark. - -To create these etexts, the Project expends considerable -efforts to identify, transcribe and proofread public domain -works. Despite these efforts, the Project's etexts and any -medium they may be on may contain "Defects". Among other -things, Defects may take the form of incomplete, inaccurate or -corrupt data, transcription errors, a copyright or other -intellectual property infringement, a defective or damaged -disk or other etext medium, a computer virus, or computer -codes that damage or cannot be read by your equipment. - -LIMITED WARRANTY; DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES -But for the "Right of Replacement or Refund" described below, -[1] the Project (and any other party you may receive this -etext from as a PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm etext) disclaims all -liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including -legal fees, and [2] YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE OR -UNDER STRICT LIABILITY, OR FOR BREACH OF WARRANTY OR CONTRACT, -INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE -OR INCIDENTAL DAMAGES, EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE -POSSIBILITY OF SUCH DAMAGES. - -If you discover a Defect in this etext within 90 days of -receiving it, you can receive a refund of the money (if any) -you paid for it by sending an explanatory note within that -time to the person you received it from. If you received it -on a physical medium, you must return it with your note, and -such person may choose to alternatively give you a replacement -copy. If you received it electronically, such person may -choose to alternatively give you a second opportunity to -receive it electronically. - -THIS ETEXT IS OTHERWISE PROVIDED TO YOU "AS-IS". NO OTHER -WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, ARE MADE TO YOU AS -TO THE ETEXT OR ANY MEDIUM IT MAY BE ON, INCLUDING BUT NOT -LIMITED TO WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY OR FITNESS FOR A -PARTICULAR PURPOSE. - -Some states do not allow disclaimers of implied warranties or -the exclusion or limitation of consequential damages, so the -above disclaimers and exclusions may not apply to you, and you -may have other legal rights. - -INDEMNITY -You will indemnify and hold the Project, its directors, -officers, members and agents harmless from all liability, cost -and expense, including legal fees, that arise directly or -indirectly from any of the following that you do or cause: -[1] distribution of this etext, [2] alteration, modification, -or addition to the etext, or [3] any Defect. - -DISTRIBUTION UNDER "PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm" -You may distribute copies of this etext electronically, or by -disk, book or any other medium if you either delete this -"Small Print!" and all other references to Project Gutenberg, -or: - -[1] Only give exact copies of it. Among other things, this - requires that you do not remove, alter or modify the - etext or this "small print!" statement. You may however, - if you wish, distribute this etext in machine readable - binary, compressed, mark-up, or proprietary form, - including any form resulting from conversion by word pro- - cessing or hypertext software, but only so long as - *EITHER*: - [*] The etext, when displayed, is clearly readable, and - does *not* contain characters other than those - intended by the author of the work, although tilde - (~), asterisk (*) and underline (_) characters may - be used to convey punctuation intended by the - author, and additional characters may be used to - indicate hypertext links; OR - - [*] The etext may be readily converted by the reader at - no expense into plain ASCII, EBCDIC or equivalent - form by the program that displays the etext (as is - the case, for instance, with most word processors); - OR - - [*] You provide, or agree to also provide on request at - no additional cost, fee or expense, a copy of the - etext in its original plain ASCII form (or in EBCDIC - or other equivalent proprietary form). - -[2] Honor the etext refund and replacement provisions of this - "Small Print!" statement. - -[3] Pay a trademark license fee to the Project of 20% of the - net profits you derive calculated using the method you - already use to calculate your applicable taxes. If you - don't derive profits, no royalty is due. Royalties are - payable to "Project Gutenberg Association / Benedictine - University" within the 60 days following each - date you prepare (or were legally required to prepare) - your annual (or equivalent periodic) tax return. - -WHAT IF YOU *WANT* TO SEND MONEY EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO? -The Project gratefully accepts contributions in money, time, -scanning machines, OCR software, public domain etexts, royalty -free copyright licenses, and every other sort of contribution -you can think of. Money should be paid to "Project Gutenberg -Association / Benedictine University". - -*END*THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.29.93*END* - - - - -This etext was created by Jo Churcher, Scarborough, Ontario -(jchurche@io.org) - - - - - -The Story of the Treasure Seekers - - -by E. Nesbit - - -Being the adventures of the -Bastable children in search of a fortune - - -TO -OSWALD BARRON -Without whom this book could never have been written -The Treasure Seekers is dedicated in -memory of childhoods identical -but for the accidents of -time and space - - - - -CONTENTS - - -1. The Council of Ways and Means -2. Digging for Treasure -3. Being Detectives -4. Good Hunting -5. The Poet and the Editor -6. Noel's Princess -7. Being Bandits -8. Being Editors -9. The G. B. -10. Lord Tottenham -11. Castilian Amoroso -12. The Nobleness of Oswald -13. The Robber and the Burglar -14. The Divining-rod -15. 'Lo, the Poor Indian!' -16. The End of the Treasure-seeking - - - - -CHAPTER 1 -THE COUNCIL OF WAYS AND MEANS - - -This is the story of the different ways we looked for treasure, and -I think when you have read it you will see that we were not lazy -about the looking. - -There are some things I must tell before I begin to tell about the -treasure-seeking, because I have read books myself, and I know how -beastly it is when a story begins, "'Alas!" said Hildegarde with a -deep sigh, "we must look our last on this ancestral home"' - and -then some one else says something - and you don't know for pages -and pages where the home is, or who Hildegarde is, or anything -about it. Our ancestral home is in the Lewisham Road. It is -semi-detached and has a garden, not a large one. We are the -Bastables. There are six of us besides Father. Our Mother is -dead, and if you think we don't care because I don't tell you much -about her you only show that you do not understand people at all. -Dora is the eldest. Then Oswald - and then Dicky. Oswald won the -Latin prize at his preparatory school - and Dicky is good at sums. -Alice and Noel are twins: they are ten, and Horace Octavius is my -youngest brother. It is one of us that tells this story - but I -shall not tell you which: only at the very end perhaps I will. -While the story is going on you may be trying to guess, only I bet -you don't. It was Oswald who first thought of looking for -treasure. Oswald often thinks of very interesting things. And -directly he thought of it he did not keep it to himself, as some -boys would have done, but he told the others, and said - - -'I'll tell you what, we must go and seek for treasure: it is always -what you do to restore the fallen fortunes of your House.' - -Dora said it was all very well. She often says that. She was -trying to mend a large hole in one of Noel's stockings. He tore it -on a nail when we were playing shipwrecked mariners on top of the -chicken-house the day H. O. fell off and cut his chin: he has the -scar still. Dora is the only one of us who ever tries to mend -anything. Alice tries to make things sometimes. Once she knitted -a red scarf for Noel because his chest is delicate, but it was much -wider at one end than the other, and he wouldn't wear it. So we -used it as a pennon, and it did very well, because most of our -things are black or grey since Mother died; and scarlet was a nice -change. Father does not like you to ask for new things. That was -one way we had of knowing that the fortunes of the ancient House of -Bastable were really fallen. Another way was that there was no -more pocket-money - except a penny now and then to the little ones, -and people did not come to dinner any more, like they used to, with -pretty dresses, driving up in cabs - and the carpets got holes in -them - and when the legs came off things they were not sent to be -mended, and we gave UP having the gardener except for the front -garden, and not that very often. And the silver in the big oak -plate-chest that is lined with green baize all went away to the -shop to have the dents and scratches taken out of it, and it never -came back. We think Father hadn't enough money to pay the silver -man for taking out the dents and scratches. The new spoons and -forks were yellowy-white, and not so heavy as the old ones, and -they never shone after the first day or two. - -Father was very ill after Mother died; and while he was ill his -business-partner went to Spain - and there was never much money -afterwards. I don't know why. Then the servants left and there -was only one, a General. A great deal of your comfort and -happiness depends on having a good General. The last but one was -nice: she used to make jolly good currant puddings for us, and let -us have the dish on the floor and pretend it was a wild boar we -were killing with our forks. But the General we have now nearly -always makes sago puddings, and they are the watery kind, and you -cannot pretend anything with them, not even islands, like you do -with porridge. - -Then we left off going to school, and Father said we should go to -a good school as soon as he could manage it. He said a holiday -would do us all good. We thought he was right, but we wished he -had told us he couldn't afford it. For of course we knew. - -Then a great many people used to come to the door with envelopes -with no stamps on them, and sometimes they got very angry, and said -they were calling for the last time before putting it in other -hands. I asked Eliza what that meant, and she kindly explained to -me, and I was so sorry for Father. - -And once a long, blue paper came; a policeman brought it, and we -were so frightened. But Father said it was all right, only when he -went up to kiss the girls after they were in bed they said he had -been crying, though I'm sure that's not true. Because only cowards -and snivellers cry, and my Father is the bravest man in the world. - -So you see it was time we looked for treasure and Oswald said so, -and Dora said it was all very well. But the others agreed with -Oswald. So we held a council. Dora was in the chair - the big -dining-room chair, that we let the fireworks off from, the Fifth of -November when we had the measles and couldn't do it in the garden. -The hole has never been mended, so now we have that chair in the -nursery, and I think it was cheap at the blowing-up we boys got -when the hole was burnt. - -'We must do something,' said Alice, 'because the exchequer is -empty.' She rattled the money-box as she spoke, and it really did -rattle because we always keep the bad sixpence in it for luck. - -'Yes - but what shall we do?' said Dicky. 'It's so jolly easy to -say let's do something.' Dicky always wants everything settled -exactly. Father calls him the Definite Article. - -'Let's read all the books again. We shall get lots of ideas out of -them.' It was Noel who suggested this, but we made him shut up, -because we knew well enough he only wanted to get back to his old -books. Noel is a poet. He sold some of his poetry once - and it -was printed, but that does not come in this part of the story. - -Then Dicky said, 'Look here. We'll be quite quiet for ten minutes -by the clock - and each think of some way to find treasure. And -when we've thought we'll try all the ways one after the other, -beginning with the eldest.' - -'I shan't be able to think in ten minutes, make it half an hour,' -said H. O. His real name is Horace Octavius, but we call him H. O. -because of the advertisement, and it's not so very long ago he was -afraid to pass the hoarding where it says 'Eat H. O.' in big -letters. He says it was when he was a little boy, but I remember -last Christmas but one, he woke in the middle of the night crying -and howling, and they said it was the pudding. But he told me -afterwards he had been dreaming that they really had come to eat H. -O., and it couldn't have been the pudding, when you come to think -of it, because it was so very plain. - -Well, we made it half an hour - and we all sat quiet, and thought -and thought. And I made up my mind before two minutes were over, -and I saw the others had, all but Dora, who is always an awful time -over everything. I got pins and needles in my leg from sitting -still so long, and when it was seven minutes H. O. cried out - 'Oh, -it must be more than half an hour!' - -H. O. is eight years old, but he cannot tell the clock yet. Oswald -could tell the clock when he was six. - -We all stretched ourselves and began to speak at once, but Dora put -up her hands to her ears and said - - -'One at a time, please. We aren't playing Babel.' (It is a very -good game. Did you ever play it?) - -So Dora made us all sit in a row on the floor, in ages, and then -she pointed at us with the finger that had the brass thimble on. -Her silver one got lost when the last General but two went away. -We think she must have forgotten it was Dora's and put it in her -box by mistake. She was a very forgetful girl. She used to forget -what she had spent money on, so that the change was never quite -right. - -Oswald spoke first. 'I think we might stop people on Blackheath - -with crape masks and horse-pistols - and say "Your money or your -life! Resistance is useless, we are armed to the teeth" - like -Dick Turpin and Claude Duval. It wouldn't matter about not having -horses, because coaches have gone out too.' - -Dora screwed up her nose the way she always does when she is going -to talk like the good elder sister in books, and said, 'That would -be very wrong: it's like pickpocketing or taking pennies out of -Father's great-coat when it's hanging in the hall.' - -I must say I don't think she need have said that, especially before -the little ones - for it was when I was only four. - -But Oswald was not going to let her see he cared, so he said - - -'Oh, very well. I can think of lots of other ways. We could -rescue an old gentleman from deadly Highwaymen.' - -'There aren't any,' said Dora. -'Oh, well, it's all the same - from deadly peril, then. There's -plenty of that. Then he would turn out to be the Prince of Wales, -and he would say, "My noble, my cherished preserver! Here is a -million pounds a year. Rise up, Sir Oswald Bastable."' - -But the others did not seem to think so, and it was Alice's turn to -say. - -She said, 'I think we might try the divining- rod. I'm sure I -could do it. I've often read about it. You hold a stick in your -hands, and when you come to where there is gold underneath the -stick kicks about. So you know. And you dig.' - -'Oh,' said Dora suddenly, 'I have an idea. But I'll say last. I -hope the divining-rod isn't wrong. I believe it's wrong in the -Bible.' - -'So is eating pork and ducks,' said Dicky. 'You can't go by that.' - -'Anyhow, we'll try the other ways first,' said Dora. 'Now, H. O.' - -'Let's be Bandits,' said H. O. 'I dare say it's wrong but it would -be fun pretending.' - -'I'm sure it's wrong,' said Dora. - -And Dicky said she thought everything wrong. She said she didn't, -and Dicky was very disagreeable. So Oswald had to make peace, and -he said - 'Dora needn't play if she doesn't want to. Nobody asked -her. And, Dicky, don't be an idiot: do dry up and let's hear what -Noel's idea is.' - -Dora and Dicky did not look pleased, but I kicked Noel under the -table to make him hurry up, and then he said he didn't think he -wanted to play any more. That's the worst of it. The others are -so jolly ready to quarrel. I told Noel to be a man and not a -snivelling pig, and at last he said he had not made up his mind -whether he would print his poetry in a book and sell it, or find a -princess and marry her. - -'Whichever it is,' he added, 'none of you shall want for anything, -though Oswald did kick me, and say I was a snivelling pig.' - -'I didn't,' said Oswald, 'I told you not to be.' And Alice -explained to him that that was quite the opposite of what he -thought. So he agreed to drop it. Then Dicky spoke. - -'You must all of you have noticed the advertisements in the papers, -telling you that ladies and gentlemen can easily earn two pounds a -week in their spare time, and to send two shillings for sample and -instructions, carefully packed free from observation. Now that we -don't go to school all our time is spare time. So I should think -we could easily earn twenty pounds a week each. That would do us -very well. We'll try some of the other things first, and directly -we have any money we'll send for the sample and instructions. And -I have another idea, but I must think about it before I say.' - -We all said, 'Out with it - what's the other idea?' - -But Dicky said, 'No.' That is Dicky all over. He never will show -you anything he's making till it's quite finished, and the same -with his inmost thoughts. But he is pleased if you seem to want to -know, so Oswald said - - -'Keep your silly old secret, then. Now, Dora, drive ahead. We've -all said except you.' - -Then Dora jumped up and dropped the stocking and the thimble (it -rolled away, and we did not find it for days), and said - - -'Let's try my way now. Besides, I'm the eldest, so it's only fair. - -Let's dig for treasure. Not any tiresome divining-rod - but just -plain digging. People who dig for treasure always find it. And -then we shall be rich and we needn't try your ways at all. Some of -them are rather difficult: and I'm certain some of them are wrong -- and we must always remember that wrong things -' - -But we told her to shut up and come on, and she did. - -I couldn't help wondering as we went down to the garden, why Father -had never thought of digging there for treasure instead of going to -his beastly office every day. - - - -CHAPTER 2 -DIGGING FOR TREASURE - - -I am afraid the last chapter was rather dull. It is always dull in -books when people talk and talk, and don't do anything, but I was -obliged to put it in, or else you wouldn't have understood all the -rest. The best part of books is when things are happening. That -is the best part of real things too. This is why I shall not tell -you in this story about all the days when nothing happened. You -will not catch me saying, 'thus the sad days passed slowly by' - or -'the years rolled on their weary course' - or 'time went on' - -because it is silly; of course time goes on - whether you say so or -not. So I shall just tell you the nice, interesting parts - and in -between you will understand that we had our meals and got up and -went to bed, and dull things like that. It would be sickening to -write all that down, though of course it happens. I said so to -Albert-next-door's uncle, who writes books, and he said, 'Quite -right, that's what we call selection, a necessity of true art.' -And he is very clever indeed. So you see. - -I have often thought that if the people who write books for -children knew a little more it would be better. I shall not tell -you anything about us except what I should like to know about if I -was reading the story and you were writing it. Albert's uncle says -I ought to have put this in the preface, but I never read prefaces, -and it is not much good writing things just for people to skip. I -wonder other authors have never thought of this. - -Well, when we had agreed to dig for treasure we all went down into -the cellar and lighted the gas. Oswald would have liked to dig -there, but it is stone flags. We looked among the old boxes and -broken chairs and fenders and empty bottles and things, and at last -we found the spades we had to dig in the sand with when we went to -the seaside three years ago. They are not silly, babyish, wooden -spades, that split if you look at them, but good iron, with a blue -mark across the top of the iron part, and yellow wooden handles. -We wasted a little time getting them dusted, because the girls -wouldn't dig with spades that had cobwebs on them. Girls would -never do for African explorers or anything like that, they are too -beastly particular. - -It was no use doing the thing by halves. We marked out a sort of -square in the mouldy part of the garden, about three yards across, -and began to dig. But we found nothing except worms and stones - -and the ground was very hard. So we thought we'd try another part -of the garden, and we found a place in the big round flower bed, -where the ground was much softer. We thought we'd make a smaller -hole to begin with, and it was much better. We dug and dug and -dug, and it was jolly hard work! We got very hot digging, but we -found nothing. - -Presently Albert-next-door looked over the wall. We do not like -him very much, but we let him play with us sometimes, because his -father is dead, and you must not be unkind to orphans, even if -their mothers are alive. Albert is always very tidy. He wears -frilly collars and velvet knickerbockers. I can't think how he can -bear to. So we said, 'Hallo!' And he said, 'What are you up to?' - -'We're digging for treasure,' said Alice; 'an ancient parchment -revealed to us the place of concealment. Come over and help us. -When we have dug deep enough we shall find a great pot of red clay, -full of gold and precious jewels.' - -Albert-next-door only sniggered and said, 'What silly nonsense!' - -He cannot play properly at all. It is very strange, because he has -a very nice uncle. You see, Albert-next-door doesn't care for -reading, and he has not read nearly so many books as we have, so he -is very foolish and ignorant, but it cannot be helped, and you just -have to put up with it when you want him to do anything. Besides, -it is wrong to be angry with people for not being so clever as you -are yourself. It is not always their faults. - -So Oswald said, 'Come and dig! Then you shall share the treasure -when we've found it.' - -But he said, 'I shan't - I don't like digging - and I'm just going -in to my tea.' - -'Come along and dig, there's a good boy,' Alice said. 'You can use -my spade. It's much the best -' - -So he came along and dug, and when once he was over the wall we -kept him at it, and we worked as well, of course, and the hole got -deep. Pincher worked too - he is our dog and he is very good at -digging. He digs for rats in the dustbin sometimes, and gets very -dirty. But we love our dog, even when his face wants washing. - -'I expect we shall have to make a tunnel,' Oswald said, 'to reach -the rich treasure.' So he jumped into the hole and began to dig at -one side. After that we took it in turns to dig at the tunnel, and -Pincher was most useful in scraping the earth out of the tunnel - -he does it with his back feet when you say 'Rats!' and he digs with -his front ones, and burrows with his nose as well. - -At last the tunnel was nearly a yard long, and big enough to creep -along to find the treasure, if only it had been a bit longer. Now -it was Albert's turn to go in and dig, but he funked it. - -'Take your turn like a man,' said Oswald - nobody can say that -Oswald doesn't take his turn like a man. But Albert wouldn't. So -we had to make him, because it was only fair. - -'It's quite easy,' Alice said. 'You just crawl in and dig with -your hands. Then when you come out we can scrape out what you've -done, with the spades. Come - be a man. You won't notice it being -dark in the tunnel if you shut your eyes tight. We've all been in -except Dora - and she doesn't like worms.' - -'I don't like worms neither.' Albert-next-door said this; but we -remembered how he had picked a fat red and black worm up in his -fingers and thrown it at Dora only the day before. So we put him -in. - -But he would not go in head first, the proper way, and dig with his -hands as we had done, and though Oswald was angry at the time, for -he hates snivellers, yet afterwards he owned that perhaps it was -just as well. You should never be afraid to own that perhaps you -were mistaken - but it is cowardly to do it unless you are quite -sure you are in the wrong. - -'Let me go in feet first,' said Albert-next-door. 'I'll dig with -my boots - I will truly, honour bright.' - -So we let him get in feet first - and he did it very slowly and at -last he was in, and only his head sticking out into the hole; and -all the rest of him in the tunnel. - -'Now dig with your boots,' said Oswald; 'and, Alice, do catch hold -of Pincher, he'll be digging again in another minute, and perhaps -it would be uncomfortable for Albert if Pincher threw the mould -into his eyes.' - -You should always try to think of these little things. Thinking of -other people's comfort makes them like you. Alice held Pincher, -and we all shouted, 'Kick! dig with your feet, for all you're -worth!' - -So Albert-next-door began to dig with his feet, and we stood on the -ground over him, waiting - and all in a minute the ground gave way, -and we tumbled together in a heap: and when we got up there was a -little shallow hollow where we had been standing, and -Albert-next-door was under- neath, stuck quite fast, because the -roof of the tunnel had tumbled in on him. He is a horribly unlucky -boy to have anything to do with. - -It was dreadful the way he cried and screamed, though he had to own -it didn't hurt, only it was rather heavy and he couldn't move his -legs. We would have dug him out all right enough, in time, but he -screamed so we were afraid the police would come, so Dicky climbed -over the wall, to tell the cook there to tell Albert-next-door's -uncle he had been buried by mistake, and to come and help dig him -out. - -Dicky was a long time gone. We wondered what had become of him, -and all the while the screaming went on and on, for we had taken -the loose earth off Albert's face so that he could scream quite -easily and comfortably. - -Presently Dicky came back and Albert-next-door's uncle came with -him. He has very long legs, and his hair is light and his face is -brown. He has been to sea, but now he writes books. I like him. - -He told his nephew to stow it, so Albert did, and then he asked him -if he was hurt - and Albert had to say he wasn't, for though he is -a coward, and very unlucky, he is not a liar like some boys are. - -'This promises to be a protracted if agreeable task,' said -Albert-next-door's uncle, rubbing his hands and looking at the hole -with Albert's head in it. 'I will get another spade,' so he -fetched the big spade out of the next-door garden tool-shed, and -began to dig his nephew out. - -'Mind you keep very still,' he said, 'or I might chunk a bit out of -you with the spade.' Then after a while he said - - -'I confess that I am not absolutely insensible to the dramatic -interest of the situation. My curiosity is excited. I own that I -should like to know how my nephew happened to be buried. But don't -tell me if you'd rather not. I suppose no force was used?' - -'Only moral force,' said Alice. They used to talk a lot about -moral force at the High School where she went, and in case you -don't know what it means I'll tell you that it is making people do -what they don't want to, just by slanging them, or laughing at -them, or promising them things if they're good. - -'Only moral force, eh?' said Albert-next-door's uncle. 'Well?' - -'Well,' Dora said, 'I'm very sorry it happened to Albert - I'd -rather it had been one of us. It would have been my turn to go -into the tunnel, only I don't like worms, so they let me off. You -see we were digging for treasure.' - -'Yes,' said Alice, 'and I think we were just coming to the -underground passage that leads to the secret hoard, when the tunnel -fell in on Albert. He is so unlucky,' and she sighed. - -Then Albert-next-door began to scream again, and his uncle wiped -his face - his own face, not Albert's - with his silk handkerchief, -and then he put it in his trousers pocket. It seems a strange -place to put a handkerchief, but he had his coat and waistcoat off -and I suppose he wanted the handkerchief handy. Digging is warm -work. - -He told Albert-next-door to drop it, or he wouldn't proceed further -in the matter, so Albert stopped screaming, and presently his uncle -finished digging him out. Albert did look so funny, with his hair -all dusty and his velvet suit covered with mould and his face muddy -with earth and crying. - -We all said how sorry we were, but he wouldn't say a word back to -us. He was most awfully sick to think he'd been the one buried, -when it might just as well have been one of us. I felt myself that -it was hard lines. - -'So you were digging for treasure,' said Albert-next-door's uncle, -wiping his face again with his handkerchief. 'Well, I fear that -your chances of success are small. I have made a careful study of -the whole subject. What I don't know about buried treasure is not -worth knowing. And I never knew more than one coin buried in any -one garden - and that is generally - Hullo - what's that?' - -He pointed to something shining in the hole he had just dragged -Albert out of. Oswald picked it up. It was a half-crown. We -looked at each other, speechless with surprise and delight, like in -books. - -'Well, that's lucky, at all events,' said Albert-next-door's uncle. - -'Let's see, that's fivepence each for you.' - -'It's fourpence - something; I can't do fractions,' said Dicky; -'there are seven of us, you see.' - -'Oh, you count Albert as one of yourselves on this occasion, eh?' - -'Of course,' said Alice; 'and I say, he was buried after all. Why -shouldn't we let him have the odd somethings, and we'll have -fourpence each.' - -We all agreed to do this, and told Albert-next-door we would bring -his share as soon as we could get the half-crown changed. He -cheered up a little at that, and his uncle wiped his face again - -he did look hot - and began to put on his coat and waistcoat. - -When he had done it he stooped and picked up something. He held it -up, and you will hardly believe it, but it is quite true - it was -another half-crown! - -'To think that there should be two!' he said; 'in all my experience -of buried treasure I never heard of such a thing!' - -I wish Albert-next-door's uncle would come treasure-seeking with us -regularly; he must have very sharp eyes: for Dora says she was -looking just the minute before at the very place where the second -half-crown was picked up from, and she never saw it. - - - -CHAPTER 3 -BEING DETECTIVES - - -The next thing that happened to us was very interesting. It was as -real as the half-crowns - not just pretending. I shall try to -write it as like a real book as I can. Of course we have read Mr -Sherlock Holmes, as well as the yellow-covered books with pictures -outside that are so badly printed; and you get them for -fourpence-halfpenny at the bookstall when the corners of them are -beginning to curl up and get dirty, with people looking to see how -the story ends when they are waiting for trains. I think this is -most unfair to the boy at the bookstall. The books are written by -a gentleman named Gaboriau, and Albert's uncle says they are the -worst translations in the world - and written in vile English. Of -course they're not like Kipling, but they're jolly good stories. -And we had just been reading a book by Dick Diddlington - that's -not his right name, but I know all about libel actions, so I shall -not say what his name is really, because his books are rot. Only -they put it into our heads to do what I am going to narrate. - -It was in September, and we were not to go to the seaside because -it is so expensive, even if you go to Sheerness, where it is all -tin cans and old boots and no sand at all. But every one else -went, even the people next door - not Albert's side, but the other. - -Their servant told Eliza they were all going to Scarborough, and -next day sure enough all the blinds were down and the shutters up, -and the milk was not left any more. There is a big horse-chestnut -tree between their garden and ours, very useful for getting conkers -out of and for making stuff to rub on your chilblains. This -prevented our seeing whether the blinds were down at the back as -well, but Dicky climbed to the top of the tree and looked, and they -were. -It was jolly hot weather, and very stuffy indoors - we used to play -a good deal in the garden. We made a tent out of the kitchen -clothes-horse and some blankets off our beds, and though it was -quite as hot in the tent as in the house it was a very different -sort of hotness. Albert's uncle called it the Turkish Bath. It is -not nice to be kept from the seaside, but we know that we have much -to be thankful for. We might be poor little children living in a -crowded alley where even at summer noon hardly a ray of sunlight -penetrates; clothed in rags and with bare feet - though I do not -mind holes in my clothes myself, and bare feet would not be at all -bad in this sort of weather. Indeed we do, sometimes, when we are -playing at things which require it. It was shipwrecked mariners -that day, I remember, and we were all in the blanket tent. We had -just finished eating the things we had saved, at the peril of our -lives, from the st-sinking vessel. They were rather nice things. -Two-pennyworth of coconut candy - it was got in Greenwich, where it -is four ounces a penny - three apples, some macaroni - the straight -sort that is so useful to suck things through - some raw rice, and -a large piece of cold suet pudding that Alice nicked from the -larder when she went to get the rice and macaroni. And when we had -finished some one said - - -'I should like to be a detective.' - -I wish to be quite fair, but I cannot remember exactly who said it. - -Oswald thinks he said it, and Dora says it was Dicky, but Oswald is -too much of a man to quarrel about a little thing like that. - -'I should like to be a detective,' said - perhaps it was Dicky, but -I think not - 'and find out strange and hidden crimes.' - -'You have to be much cleverer than you are,' said H. O. - -'Not so very,' Alice said, 'because when you've read the books you -know what the things mean: the red hair on the handle of the knife, -or the grains of white powder on the velvet collar of the villain's -overcoat. I believe we could do it.' - -'I shouldn't like to have anything to do with murders,' said Dora; -'somehow it doesn't seem safe -' - -'And it always ends in the poor murderer being hanged,' said Alice. - -We explained to her why murderers have to be hanged, but she only -said, 'I don't care. I'm sure no one would ever do murdering -twice. Think of the blood and things, and what you would see when -you woke up in the night! I shouldn't mind being a detective to -lie in wait for a gang of coiners, now, and spring upon them -unawares, and secure them - single-handed, you know, or with only -my faithful bloodhound.' - -She stroked Pincher's ears, but he had gone to sleep because he -knew well enough that all the suet pudding was finished. He is a -very sensible dog. -'You always get hold of the wrong end of the stick,' Oswald said. -'You can't choose what crimes you'll be a detective about. You -just have to get a suspicious circumstance, and then you look for -a clue and follow it up. Whether it turns out a murder or a -missing will is just a fluke.' - -'That's one way,' Dicky said. 'Another is to get a paper and find -two advertisements or bits of news that fit. Like this: "Young -Lady Missing," and then it tells about all the clothes she had on, -and the gold locket she wore, and the colour of her hair, and all -that; and then in another piece of the paper you see, "Gold locket -found," and then it all comes out.' - -We sent H. O. for the paper at once, but we could not make any of -the things fit in. The two best were about how some burglars broke -into a place in Holloway where they made preserved tongues and -invalid delicacies, and carried off a lot of them. And on another -page there was, 'Mysterious deaths in Holloway.' - -Oswald thought there was something in it, and so did Albert's uncle -when we asked him, but the others thought not, so Oswald agreed to -drop it. Besides, Holloway is a long way off. All the time we -were talking about the paper Alice seemed to be thinking about -something else, and when we had done she said - - -'I believe we might be detectives ourselves, but I should not like -to get anybody into trouble.' - -'Not murderers or robbers?' Dicky asked. - -'It wouldn't be murderers,' she said; 'but I have noticed something -strange. Only I feel a little frightened. Let's ask Albert's -uncle first.' - -Alice is a jolly sight too fond of asking grown-UP people things. -And we all said it was tommyrot, and she was to tell us. - -'Well, promise you won't do anything without me,' Alice said, and -we promised. Then she said - 'This is a dark secret, and any one -who thinks it is better not to be involved in a career of crime- -discovery had better go away ere yet it be too late.' - -So Dora said she had had enough of tents, and she was going to look -at the shops. H. O. went with her because he had twopence to -spend. They thought it was only a game of Alice's but Oswald knew -by the way she spoke. He can nearly always tell. And when people -are not telling the truth Oswald generally knows by the way they -look with their eyes. Oswald is not proud of being able to do -this. He knows it is through no merit of his own that he is much -cleverer than some people. - -When they had gone, the rest of us got closer together and said - -'Now then.' - -'Well,' Alice said, 'you know the house next door? The people have -gone to Scarborough. And the house is shut up. But last night I -saw a light in the windows.' - -We asked her how and when, because her room is in the front, and -she couldn't possibly have seen. And then she said - - -'I'll tell you if you boys will promise not ever to go fishing -again without me.' So we had to promise. Then she said - - -'It was last night. I had forgotten to feed my rabbits and I woke -up and remembered it. And I was afraid I should find them dead in -the morning, like Oswald did.' - -'It wasn't my fault,' Oswald said; 'there was something the matter -with the beasts. I fed them right enough.' - -Alice said she didn't mean that, and she went on - - -'I came down into the garden, and I saw a light in the house, and -dark figures moving about. I thought perhaps it was burglars, but -Father hadn't come home, and Eliza had gone to bed, so I couldn't -do anything. Only I thought perhaps I would tell the rest of you.' - - -'Why didn't you tell us this morning?' Noel asked. And Alice -explained that she did not want to get any one into trouble, even -burglars. 'But we might watch to-night,' she said, 'and see if we -see the light again.' - -'They might have been burglars,' Noel said. He was sucking the -last bit of his macaroni. 'You know the people next door are very -grand. They won't know us - and they go out in a real private -carriage sometimes. And they have an "At Home" day, and people -come in cabs. I daresay they have piles of plate and jewellery and -rich brocades, and furs of price and things like that. Let us keep -watch to-night.' - -'It's no use watching to-night,' Dicky said; 'if it's only burglars -they won't come again. But there are other things besides burglars -that are discovered in empty houses where lights are seen moving.' - -'You mean coiners,' said Oswald at once. 'I wonder what the reward -is for setting the police on their track?' - -Dicky thought it ought to be something fat, because coiners are -always a desperate gang; and the machinery they make the coins with -is so heavy and handy for knocking down detectives. - -Then it was tea-time, and we went in; and Dora and H. O. had -clubbed their money together and bought a melon; quite a big one, -and only a little bit squashy at one end. It was very good, and -then we washed the seeds and made things with them and with pins -and cotton. And nobody said any more about watching the house next -door. - -Only when we went to bed Dicky took off his coat and waistcoat, but -he stopped at his braces, and said - - -'What about the coiners?' - -Oswald had taken off his collar and tie, and he was just going to -say the same, so he said, 'Of course I meant to watch, only my -collar's rather tight, so I thought I'd take it off first.' - -Dicky said he did not think the girls ought to be in it, because -there might be danger, but Oswald reminded him that they had -promised Alice, and that a promise is a sacred thing, even when -you'd much rather not. So Oswald got Alice alone under pretence of -showing her a caterpillar - Dora does not like them, and she -screamed and ran away when Oswald offered to show it her. Then -Oswald explained, and Alice agreed to come and watch if she could. -This made us later than we ought to have been, because Alice had to -wait till Dora was quiet and then creep out very slowly, for fear -of the boards creaking. The girls sleep with their room-door open -for fear of burglars. Alice had kept on her clothes under her -nightgown when Dora wasn't looking, and presently we got down, -creeping past Father's study, and out at the glass door that leads -on to the veranda and the iron steps into the garden. And we went -down very quietly, and got into the chestnut-tree; and then I felt -that we had only been playing what Albert's uncle calls our -favourite instrument - I mean the Fool. For the house next door -was as dark as dark. Then suddenly we heard a sound - it came from -the gate at the end of the garden. All the gardens have gates; -they lead into a kind of lane that runs behind them. It is a sort -of back way, very convenient when you don't want to say exactly -where you are going. We heard the gate at the end of the next -garden click, and Dicky nudged Alice so that she would have fallen -out of the tree if it had not been for Oswald's extraordinary -presence of mind. Oswald squeezed Alice's arm tight, and we all -looked; and the others were rather frightened because really we had -not exactly expected anything to happen except perhaps a light. -But now a muffled figure, shrouded in a dark cloak, came swiftly up -the path of the next-door garden. And we could see that under its -cloak the figure carried a mysterious burden. The figure was -dressed to look like a woman in a sailor hat. - -We held our breath as it passed under the tree where we were, and -then it tapped very gently on the back door and was let in, and -then a light appeared in the window of the downstairs back -breakfast-room. But the shutters were up. - -Dicky said, 'My eye!' and wouldn't the others be sick to think they -hadn't been in this! But Alice didn't half like it - and as she is -a girl I do not blame her. Indeed, I thought myself at first that -perhaps it would be better to retire for the present, and return -later with a strongly armed force. -'It's not burglars,' Alice whispered; 'the mysterious Stranger was -bringing things in, not taking them out. They must be coiners - -and oh, Oswald! - don't let's! The things they coin with must hurt -very much. Do let's go to bed!' - -But Dicky said he was going to see; if there was a reward for -finding out things like this he would like to have the reward. - -'They locked the back door,' he whispered, 'I heard it go. And I -could look in quite well through the holes in the shutters and be -back over the wall long before they'd got the door open, even if -they started to do it at once.' - -There were holes at the top of the shutters the shape of hearts, -and the yellow light came out through them as well as through the -chinks of the shutters. - -Oswald said if Dicky went he should, because he was the eldest; and -Alice said, 'If any one goes it ought to be me, because I thought -of it.' - -So Oswald said, 'Well, go then'; and she said, 'Not for anything!' -And she begged us not to, and we talked about it in the tree till -we were all quite hoarse with whispering. - -At last we decided on a plan of action. - -Alice was to stay in the tree, and scream 'Murder!' if anything -happened. Dicky and I were to get down into the next garden and -take it in turns to peep. - -So we got down as quietly as we could, but the tree made much more -noise than it does in the day, and several times we paused, fearing -that all was discovered. But nothing happened. - -There was a pile of red flower-pots under the window and one very -large one was on the window-ledge. It seemed as if it was the hand -of Destiny had placed it there, and the geranium in it was dead, -and there was nothing to stop your standing on it - so Oswald did. -He went first because he is the eldest, and though Dicky tried to -stop him because he thought of it first it could not be, on account -of not being able to say anything. - -So Oswald stood on the flower-pot and tried to look through one of -the holes. He did not really expect to see the coiners at their -fell work, though he had pretended to when we were talking in the -tree. But if he had seen them pouring the base molten metal into -tin moulds the shape of half-crowns he would not have been half so -astonished as he was at the spectacle now revealed. - -At first he could see little, because the hole had unfortunately -been made a little too high, so that the eye of the detective could -only see the Prodigal Son in a shiny frame on the opposite wall. -But Oswald held on to the window-frame and stood on tiptoe and then -he saw. - -There was no furnace, and no base metal, no bearded men in leathern -aprons with tongs and things, but just a table with a table-cloth -on it for supper, and a tin of salmon and a lettuce and some -bottled beer. And there on a chair was the cloak and the hat of -the mysterious stranger, and the two people sitting at the table -were the two youngest grown-up daughters of the lady next door, and -one of them was saying - - -'So I got the salmon three-halfpence cheaper, and the lettuces are -only six a penny in the Broad- way, just fancy! We must save as -much as ever we can on our housekeeping money if we want to go away -decent next year.' - -And the other said, 'I wish we could all go every year, or else - -Really, I almost wish -' - -And all the time Oswald was looking Dicky was pulling at his jacket -to make him get down and let Dicky have a squint. And just as she -said 'I almost,' Dicky pulled too hard and Oswald felt himself -toppling on the giddy verge of the big flower-pots. Putting forth -all his strength our hero strove to recover his equi- -what's-its-name, but it was now lost beyond recall. - -'You've done it this time!' he said, then he fell heavily among the -flower-pots piled below. He heard them crash and rattle and crack, -and then his head struck against an iron pillar used for holding up -the next-door veranda. His eyes closed and he knew no more. - -Now you will perhaps expect that at this moment Alice would have -cried 'Murder!' If you think so you little know what girls are. -Directly she was left alone in that tree she made a bolt to tell -Albert's uncle all about it and bring him to our rescue in case the -coiner's gang was a very desperate one. And just when I fell, -Albert's uncle was getting over the wall. Alice never screamed at -all when Oswald fell, but Dicky thinks he heard Albert's uncle say, -'Confound those kids!' which would not have been kind or polite, so -I hope he did not say it. - -The people next door did not come out to see what the row was. -Albert's uncle did not wait for them to come out. He picked up -Oswald and carried the insensible body of the gallant young -detective to the wall, laid it on the top, and then climbed over -and bore his lifeless burden into our house and put it on the sofa -in Father's study. Father was out, so we needn't have crept so -when we were getting into the garden. Then Oswald was restored to -consciousness, and his head tied up, and sent to bed, and next day -there was a lump on his young brow as big as a turkey's egg, and -very uncomfortable. - -Albert's uncle came in next day and talked to each of us -separately. To Oswald he said many unpleasant things about -ungentlemanly to spy on ladies, and about minding your own -business; and when I began to tell him what I had heard he told me -to shut up, and altogether he made me more uncomfortable than the -bump did. - -Oswald did not say anything to any one, but next day, as the -shadows of eve were falling, he crept away, and wrote on a piece of -paper, 'I want to speak to you,' and shoved it through the hole -like a heart in the top of the next-door shutters. -And the youngest young lady put an eye to the heart-shaped hole, -and then opened the shutter and said 'Well?' very crossly. Then -Oswald said - - -'I am very sorry, and I beg your pardon. We wanted to be -detectives, and we thought a gang of coiners infested your house, -so we looked through your window last night. I saw the lettuce, -and I heard what you said about the salmon being three-halfpence -cheaper, and I know it is very dishonourable to pry into other -people's secrets, especially ladies', and I never will again if you -will forgive me this once.' - -Then the lady frowned and then she laughed, and then she said - - -'So it was you tumbling into the flower-pots last night? We -thought it was burglars. It frightened us horribly. Why, what a -bump on your poor head!' - -And then she talked to me a bit, and presently she said she and her -sister had not wished people to know they were at home, because - -And then she stopped short and grew very red, and I said, 'I -thought you were all at Scarborough; your servant told Eliza so. -Why didn't you want people to know you were at home?' - -The lady got redder still, and then she laughed and said - - -'Never mind the reason why. I hope your head doesn't hurt much. -Thank you for your nice, manly little speech. You've nothing to be -ashamed of, at any rate.' Then she kissed me, and I did not mind. -And then she said, 'Run away now, dear. I'm going to - I'm going -to pull up the blinds and open the shutters, and I want to do it at -once, before it gets dark, so that every one can see we're at home, -and not at Scarborough.' - - - -CHAPTER 4 -GOOD HUNTING - - -When we had got that four shillings by digging for treasure we -ought, by rights, to have tried Dicky's idea of answering the -advertisement about ladies and gentlemen and spare time and two -pounds a week, but there were several things we rather wanted. - -Dora wanted a new pair of scissors, and she said she was going to -get them with her eight-pence. But Alice said - - -'You ought to get her those, Oswald, because you know you broke the -points off hers getting the marble out of the brass thimble.' - -It was quite true, though I had almost forgotten it, but then it -was H. O. who jammed the marble into the thimble first of all. So -I said - - -'It's H. O.'s fault as much as mine, anyhow. Why shouldn't he -pay?' - -Oswald didn't so much mind paying for the beastly scissors, but he -hates injustice of every kind. - -'He's such a little kid,' said Dicky, and of course H. O. said he -wasn't a little kid, and it very nearly came to being a row between -them. But Oswald knows when to be generous; so he said - - -'Look here! I'll pay sixpence of the scissors, and H. O. shall pay -the rest, to teach him to be careful.' - -H. O. agreed: he is not at all a mean kid, but I found out -afterwards that Alice paid his share out of her own money. - -Then we wanted some new paints, and NoEl wanted a pencil and a -halfpenny account-book to write poetry with, and it does seem hard -never to have any apples. So, somehow or other nearly all the -money got spent, and we agreed that we must let the advertisement -run loose a little longer. - -'I only hope,' Alice said, 'that they won't have got all the ladies -and gentlemen they want before we have got the money to write for -the sample and instructions.' - -And I was a little afraid myself, because it seemed such a splendid -chance; but we looked in the paper every day, and the advertisement -was always there, so we thought it was all right. - -Then we had the detective try-on - and it proved no go; and then, -when all the money was gone, except a halfpenny of mine and -twopence of Noel's and three-pence of Dicky's and a few pennies -that the girls had left, we held another council. - -Dora was sewing the buttons on H. O.'s Sunday things. He got -himself a knife with his money, and he cut every single one of his -best buttons off. You've no idea how many buttons there are on a -suit. Dora counted them. There are twenty-four, counting the -little ones on the sleeves that don't undo. - -Alice was trying to teach Pincher to beg; but he has too much sense -when he knows you've got nothing in your hands, and the rest of us -were roasting potatoes under the fire. We had made a fire on -purpose, though it was rather warm. They are very good if you cut -away the burnt parts - but you ought to wash them first, or you are -a dirty boy. - -'Well, what can we do?' said Dicky. 'You are so fond of saying -"Let's do something!" and never saying what.' - -'We can't try the advertisement yet. Shall we try rescuing some -one?' said Oswald. It was his own idea, but he didn't insist on -doing it, though he is next to the eldest, for he knows it is bad -manners to make people do what you want, when they would rather -not. - -'What was Noel's plan?' Alice asked. - -'A Princess or a poetry book,' said Noel sleepily. He was lying on -his back on the sofa, kicking his legs. 'Only I shall look for the -Princess all by myself. But I'll let you see her when we're -married.' - -'Have you got enough poetry to make a book?' Dicky asked that, and -it was rather sensible of him, because when Noel came to look there -were only seven of his poems that any of us could understand. -There was the 'Wreck of the Malabar', and the poem he wrote when -Eliza took us to hear the Reviving Preacher, and everybody cried, -and Father said it must have been the Preacher's Eloquence. So -Noel wrote: - - -O Eloquence and what art thou? -Ay what art thou? because we cried -And everybody cried inside -When they came out their eyes were red - -And it was your doing Father said. - - -But Noel told Alice he got the first line and a half from a book a -boy at school was going to write when he had time. Besides this -there were the 'Lines on a Dead Black Beetle that was poisoned': - - -Beetle how I weep to see -Thee lying on thy poor back! -It is so very sad indeed. -You were so shiny and black. -I wish you were alive again -But Eliza says wishing it is nonsense and a shame. - - -It was very good beetle poison, and there were hundreds of them -lying dead - but Noel only wrote a piece of poetry for one of them. - -He said he hadn't time to do them all, and the worst of it was he -didn't know which one he'd written it to - so Alice couldn't bury -the beetle and put the lines on its grave, though she wanted to -very much. - -Well, it was quite plain that there wasn't enough poetry for a -book. - -'We might wait a year or two,' said Noel. 'I shall be sure to make -some more some time. I thought of a piece about a fly this morning -that knew condensed milk was sticky.' -'But we want the money now,' said Dicky, 'and you can go on writing -just the same. It will come in some time or other.' - -'There's poetry in newspapers,' said Alice. 'Down, Pincher! you'll -never be a clever dog, so it's no good trying.' - -'Do they pay for it?' Dicky thought of that; he often thinks of -things that are really important, even if they are a little dull. - -'I don't know. But I shouldn't think any one would let them print -their poetry without. I wouldn't I know.' That was Dora; but Noel -said he wouldn't mind if he didn't get paid, so long as he saw his -poetry printed and his name at the end. - -'We might try, anyway,' said Oswald. He is always willing to give -other people's ideas a fair trial. - -So we copied out 'The Wreck of the Malabar' and the other six poems -on drawing-paper - Dora did it, she writes best - and Oswald drew -a picture of the Malabar going down with all hands. It was a -full-rigged schooner, and all the ropes and sails were correct; -because my cousin is in the Navy, and he showed me. - -We thought a long time whether we'd write a letter and send it by -post with the poetry - and Dora thought it would be best. But NoEl -said he couldn't bear not to know at once if the paper would print -the poetry, So we decided to take it. - -I went with Noel, because I am the eldest, and he is not old enough -to go to London by himself. Dicky said poetry was rot - and he was -glad he hadn't got to make a fool of himself. that was because -there was not enough money for him to go with us. H. O. couldn't -come either, but he came to the station to see us off, and waved -his cap and called out 'Good hunting!' as the train started. - -There was a lady in spectacles in the corner. She was writing with -a pencil on the edges of long strips of paper that had print all -down them. When the train started she asked - - -'What was that he said?' - -So Oswald answered - - -'It was "Good hunting" - it's out of the jungle book!' -'That's very pleasant to hear,' the lady said; 'I am very pleased -to meet people who know their jungle book. And where are you off -to - the Zoological Gardens to look for Bagheera?' - -We were pleased, too, to meet some one who knew the jungle book. - -So Oswald said - - -'We are going to restore the fallen fortunes of the House of -Bastable - and we have all thought of different ways - and we're -going to try them all. Noel's way is poetry. I suppose great -poets get paid?' - -The lady laughed - she was awfully jolly - and said she was a sort -of poet, too, and the long strips of paper were the proofs of her -new book of stories. Because before a book is made into a real -book with pages and a cover, they sometimes print it all on strips -of paper, and the writer make marks on it with a pencil to show the -printers what idiots they are not to understand what a writer means -to have printed. - -We told her all about digging for treasure, and what we meant to -do. Then she asked to see Noel's poetry - and he said he didn't -like - so she said, 'Look here - if you'll show me yours I'll show -you some of mine.' So he agreed. - -The jolly lady read NoEl's poetry, and she said she liked it very -much. And she thought a great deal of the picture of the Malabar. -And then she said, 'I write serious poetry like yours myself; too, -but I have a piece here that I think you will like because it's -about a boy.' She gave it to us - and so I can copy it down, and -I will, for it shows that some grown-up ladies are not so silly as -others. I like it better than NoEl's poetry, though I told him I -did not, because he looked as if he was going to cry. This was -very wrong, for you should always speak the truth, however unhappy -it makes people. And I generally do. But I did not want him -crying in the railway carriage. The lady's piece of poetry: - - -Oh when I wake up in my bed -And see the sun all fat and red, -I'm glad to have another day -For all my different kinds of play. - -There are so many things to do - -The things that make a man of you, -If grown-ups did not get so vexed -And wonder what you will do next. - -I often wonder whether they -Ever made up our kinds of play - -If they were always good as gold -And only did what they were told. - -They like you best to play with tops -And toys in boxes, bought in shops; -They do not even know the names -Of really interesting games. - -They will not let you play with fire -Or trip your sister up with wire, -They grudge the tea-tray for a drum, -Or booby-traps when callers come. - -They don't like fishing, and it's true -You sometimes soak a suit or two: -They look on fireworks, though they're dry, -With quite a disapproving eye. - -They do not understand the way -To get the most out of your day: -They do not know how hunger feels -Nor what you need between your meals. - -And when you're sent to bed at night, -They're happy, but they're not polite. -For through the door you hear them say: -'He's done his mischief for the day!' - - -She told us a lot of other pieces but I cannot remember them, and -she talked to us all the way up, and when we got nearly to Cannon -Street she said - - -'I've got two new shillings here! Do you think they would help to -smooth the path to Fame?' - -Noel said, 'Thank you,' and was going to take the shilling. But -Oswald, who always remembers what he is told, said - - -'Thank you very much, but Father told us we ought never to take -anything from strangers.' - -'That's a nasty one,' said the lady - she didn't talk a bit like a -real lady, but more like a jolly sort of grown-up boy in a dress -and hat - 'a very nasty one! But don't you think as Noel and I are -both poets I might be considered a sort of relation? You've heard -of brother poets, haven't you? Don't you think NoEl and I are aunt -and nephew poets, or some relationship of that kind?' - -I didn't know what to say, and she went on - - -'It's awfully straight of you to stick to what your Father tells -you, but look here, you take the shillings, and here's my card. -When you get home tell your Father all about it, and if he says No, -you can just bring the shillings back to me.' - -So we took the shillings, and she shook hands with us and said, -'Good-bye, and good hunting!' - -We did tell Father about it, and he said it was all right, and when -he looked at the card he told us we were highly honoured, for the -lady wrote better poetry than any other lady alive now. We had -never heard of her, and she seemed much too jolly for a poet. Good -old Kipling! We owe him those two shillings, as well as the jungle -books! - - -CHAPTER 5 -THE POET AND THE EDITOR - - - -It was not bad sport - being in London entirely on our own hook. -We asked the way to Fleet Street, where Father says all the -newspaper offices are. They said straight on down Ludgate Hill - -but it turned out to be quite another way. At least we didn't go -straight on. - -We got to St Paul's. Noel WOULD go in, and we saw where Gordon was -buried - at least the monument. It is very flat, considering what -a man he was. - -When we came out we walked a long way, and when we asked a -policeman he said we'd better go back through Smithfield. So we -did. They don't burn people any more there now, so it was rather -dull, besides being a long way, and Noel got very tired. He's a -peaky little chap; it comes of being a poet, I think. We had a bun -or two at different shops - out of the shillings - and it was quite -late in the afternoon when we got to Fleet Street. The gas was -lighted and the electric lights. There is a jolly Bovril sign that -comes off and on in different coloured lamps. We went to the Daily -Recorder office, and asked to see the Editor. It is a big office, -very bright, with brass and mahogany and electric lights. - -They told us the Editor wasn't there, but at another office. So we -went down a dirty street, to a very dull-looking place. There was -a man there inside, in a glass case, as if he was a museum, and he -told us to write down our names and our business. So Oswald wrote -- - - -OSWALD BASTABLE. - -NOEL BASTABLE. - -Business very private indeed. - - -Then we waited on the stone stairs; it was very draughty. And the -man in the glass case looked at us as if we were the museum instead -of him. We waited a long time, and then a boy came down and said -- - -'The Editor can't see you. Will you please write your business?' -And he laughed. I wanted to punch his head. - -But Noel said, 'Yes, I'll write it if you'll give me a pen and ink, -and a sheet of paper and an envelope.' - -The boy said he'd better write by post. But Noel is a bit -pig-headed; it's his worst fault. So he said - -'No, I'll write it now.' So I backed him up by saying - - -'Look at the price penny stamps are since the coal strike!' - - -So the boy grinned, and the man in the glass case gave us pen and -paper, and Noel wrote. Oswald writes better than he does; but Noel -would do it; and it took a very long time, and then it was inky. - - -DEAR MR EDITOR, I want you to print my poetry and pay for it, and -I am a friend of Mrs Leslie's; she is a poet too. - -Your affectionate friend, - -NOEL BASTABLE. - - -He licked the envelope a good deal, so that that boy shouldn't read -it going upstairs; and he wrote 'Very private' outside, and gave -the letter to the boy. I thought it wasn't any good; but in a -minute the grinning boy came back, and he was quite respectful, and -said - 'The Editor says, please will you step up?' - -We stepped up. There were a lot of stairs and passages, and a -queer sort of humming, hammering sound and a very funny smell. The -boy was now very polite, and said it was the ink we smelt, and the -noise was the printing machines. - -After going through a lot of cold passages we came to a door; the -boy opened it, and let us go in. There was a large room, with a -big, soft, blue-and-red carpet, and a roaring fire, though it was -only October; and a large table with drawers, and littered with -papers, just like the one in Father's study. A gentleman was -sitting at one side of the table; he had a light moustache and -light eyes, and he looked very young to be an editor - not nearly -so old as Father. He looked very tired and sleepy, as if he had -got up very early in the morning; but he was kind, and we liked -him. Oswald thought he looked clever. Oswald is considered a -judge of faces. - -'Well,' said he, 'so you are Mrs Leslie's friends?' -'I think so,' said Noel; 'at least she gave us each a shilling, and -she wished us "good hunting!"' - -'Good hunting, eh? Well, what about this poetry of yours? Which -is the poet?' - -I can't think how he could have asked! Oswald is said to be a very -manly-looking boy for his age. However, I thought it would look -duffing to be offended, so I said - - -'This is my brother Noel. He is the poet.' Noel had turned quite -pale. He is disgustingly like a girl in some ways. The Editor -told us to sit down, and he took the poems from Noel, and began to -read them. Noel got paler and paler; I really thought he was going -to faint, like he did when I held his hand under the cold-water -tap, after I had accidentally cut him with my chisel. When the -Editor had read the first poem - it was the one about the beetle - -he got up and stood with his back to us. It was not manners; but -Noel thinks he did it 'to conceal his emotion,' as they do in -books. He read all the poems, and then he said - - -'I like your poetry very much, young man. I'll give you - let me -see; how much shall I give you for it?' - -'As much as ever you can,' said Noel. 'You see I want a good deal -of money to restore the fallen fortunes of the house of Bastable.' - -The gentleman put on some eye-glasses and looked hard at us. Then -he sat down. - -'That's a good idea,' said he. 'Tell me how you came to think of -it. And, I say, have you had any tea? They've just sent out for -mine.' - -He rang a tingly bell, and the boy brought in a tray with a teapot -and a thick cup and saucer and things, and he had to fetch another -tray for us, when he was told to; and we had tea with the Editor of -the Daily Recorder. I suppose it was a very proud moment for Noel, -though I did not think of that till afterwards. The Editor asked -us a lot of questions, and we told him a good deal, though of -course I did not tell a stranger all our reasons for thinking that -the family fortunes wanted restoring. We stayed about half an -hour, and when we were going away he said again - - -'I shall print all your poems, my poet; and now what do you think -they're worth?' - -'I don't know,' Noel said. 'You see I didn't write them to sell.' - -'Why did you write them then?' he asked. - -Noel said he didn't know; he supposed because he wanted to. - -'Art for Art's sake, eh?' said the Editor, and he seemed quite -delighted, as though Noel had said something clever. - -'Well, would a guinea meet your views?' he asked. - -I have read of people being at a loss for words, and dumb with -emotion, and I've read of people being turned to stone with -astonishment, or joy, or something, but I never knew how silly it -looked till I saw Noel standing staring at the Editor with his -mouth open. He went red and he went white, and then he got -crimson, as if you were rubbing more and more crimson lake on a -palette. But he didn't say a word, so Oswald had to say - 'I -should jolly well think so.' -So the Editor gave Noel a sovereign and a shilling, and he shook -hands with us both, but he thumped Noel on the back and said - - -'Buck up, old man! It's your first guinea, but it won't be your -last. Now go along home, and in about ten years you can bring me -some more poetry. Not before - see? I'm just taking this poetry -of yours because I like it very much; but we don't put poetry in -this paper at all. I shall have to put it in another paper I know -of.' - -'What do you put in your paper?' I asked, for Father always takes -the Daily Chronicle, and I didn't know what the Recorder was like. -We chose it because it has such a glorious office, and a clock -outside lighted up. - -'Oh, news,' said he, 'and dull articles, and things about -Celebrities. If you know any Celebrities, now?' - -Noel asked him what Celebrities were. - -'Oh, the Queen and the Princes, and people with titles, and people -who write, or sing, or act - or do something clever or wicked.' - -'I don't know anybody wicked,' said Oswald, wishing he had known -Dick Turpin, or Claude Duval, so as to be able to tell the Editor -things about them. 'But I know some one with a title - Lord -Tottenham.' - -'The mad old Protectionist, eh? How did you come to know him?' - -'We don't know him to speak to. But he goes over the Heath every -day at three, and he strides along like a giant - with a black -cloak like Lord Tennyson's flying behind him, and he talks to -himself like one o'clock.' - -'What does he say?' The Editor had sat down again, and he was -fiddling with a blue pencil. - -'We only heard him once, close enough to understand, and then he -said, "The curse of the country, sir - ruin and desolation!" And -then he went striding along again, hitting at the furze-bushes as -if they were the heads of his enemies.' - -'Excellent descriptive touch,' said the Editor. 'Well, go on.' - -'That's all I know about him, except that he stops in the middle of -the Heath every day, and he looks all round to see if there's any -one about, and if there isn't, he takes his collar off.' - -The Editor interrupted - which is considered rude - and said - - -'You're not romancing?' - -'I beg your pardon?' said Oswald. -'Drawing the long bow, I mean,' said the Editor. - -Oswald drew himself up, and said he wasn't a liar. - -The Editor only laughed, and said romancing and lying were not at -all the same; only it was important to know what you were playing -at. So Oswald accepted his apology, and went on. - -'We were hiding among the furze-bushes one day, and we saw him do -it. He took off his collar, and he put on a clean one, and he -threw the other among the furze-bushes. We picked it up -afterwards, and it was a beastly paper one!' - -'Thank you,' said the Editor, and he got up and put his hand in his -pocket. 'That's well worth five shillings, and there they are. -Would you like to see round the printing offices before you go -home?' - -I pocketed my five bob, and thanked him, and I said we should like -it very much. He called another gentleman and said something we -couldn't hear. Then he said good-bye again; and all this time Noel -hadn't said a word. But now he said, 'I've made a poem about you. -It is called "Lines to a Noble Editor." Shall I write it down?' - -The Editor gave him the blue pencil, and he sat down at the -Editor's table and wrote. It was this, he told me afterwards as -well as he could remember - - - -May Life's choicest blessings be your lot -I think you ought to be very blest -For you are going to print my poems - -And you may have this one as well as the rest. - - -'Thank you,' said the Editor. 'I don't think I ever had a poem -addressed to me before. I shall treasure it, I assure you.' - -Then the other gentleman said something about Maecenas, and we went -off to see the printing office with at least one pound seven in our -pockets. - -It was good hunting, and no mistake! - -But he never put Noel's poetry in the Daily Recorder. It was quite -a long time afterwards we saw a sort of story thing in a magazine, -on the station bookstall, and that kind, sleepy-looking Editor had -written it, I suppose. It was not at all amusing. It said a lot -about Noel and me, describing us all wrong, and saying how we had -tea with the Editor; and all Noel's poems were in the story thing. -I think myself the Editor seemed to make game of them, but Noel was -quite pleased to see them printed - so that's all right. It wasn't -my poetry anyhow, I am glad to say. - - -CHAPTER 6 -NOEL'S PRINCESS - - - -She happened quite accidentally. We were not looking for a -Princess at all just then; but Noel had said he was going to find -a Princess all by himself; and marry her - and he really did. -Which was rather odd, because when people say things are going to -befall, very often they don't. It was different, of course, with -the prophets of old. - -We did not get any treasure by it, except twelve chocolate drops; -but we might have done, and it was an adventure, anyhow. - -Greenwich Park is a jolly good place to play in, especially the -parts that aren't near Greenwich. The parts near the Heath are -first-rate. I often wish the Park was nearer our house; but I -suppose a Park is a difficult thing to move. - -Sometimes we get Eliza to put lunch in a basket, and we go up to -the Park. She likes that - it saves cooking dinner for us; and -sometimes she says of her own accord, 'I've made some pasties for -you, and you might as well go into the Park as not. It's a lovely -day.' - -She always tells us to rinse out the cup at the drinking-fountain, -and the girls do; but I always put my head under the tap and drink. - -Then you are an intrepid hunter at a mountain stream - and besides, -you're sure it's clean. Dicky does the same, and so does H. O. But -Noel always drinks out of the cup. He says it is a golden goblet -wrought by enchanted gnomes. - -The day the Princess happened was a fine, hot day, last October, -and we were quite tired with the walk up to the Park. - -We always go in by the little gate at the top of Croom's Hill. It -is the postern gate that things always happen at in stories. It -was dusty walking, but when we got in the Park it was ripping, so -we rested a bit, and lay on our backs, and looked up at the trees, -and wished we could play monkeys. I have done it before now, but -the Park-keeper makes a row if he catches you. When we'd rested a -little, Alice said - - -'It was a long way to the enchanted wood, but it is very nice now -we are there. I wonder what we shall find in it?' - -'We shall find deer,' said Dicky, 'if we go to look; but they go on -the other side of the Park because of the people with buns.' - -Saying buns made us think of lunch, so we had it; and when we had -done we scratched a hole under a tree and buried the papers, -because we know it spoils pretty places to leave beastly, greasy -papers lying about. I remember Mother teaching me and Dora that, -when we were quite little. I wish everybody's parents would teach -them this useful lesson, and the same about orange peel. - -When we'd eaten everything there was, Alice whispered - - -'I see the white witch bear yonder among the trees! Let's track it -and slay it in its lair.' - -'I am the bear,' said NoEl; so he crept away, and we followed him -among the trees. Often the witch bear was out of sight, and then -you didn't know where it would jump out from; but sometimes we saw -it, and just followed. - -'When we catch it there'll be a great fight,' said Oswald; 'and I -shall be Count Folko of Mont Faucon.' - -'I'll be Gabrielle,' said Dora. She is the only one of us who -likes doing girl's parts. - -'I'll be Sintram,' said Alice; 'and H. O. can be the Little -Master.' - -'What about Dicky?' - -'Oh, I can be the Pilgrim with the bones.' - -'Hist!' whispered Alice. 'See his white fairy fur gleaming amid -yonder covert!' - -And I saw a bit of white too. It was Noel's collar, and it had -come undone at the back. - -We hunted the bear in and out of the trees, and then we lost him -altogether; and suddenly we found the wall of the Park - in a place -where I'm sure there wasn't a wall before. Noel wasn't anywhere -about, and there was a door in the wall. And it was open; so we -went through. - -'The bear has hidden himself in these mountain fastnesses,' Oswald -said. 'I will draw my good sword and after him.' - -So I drew the umbrella, which Dora always will bring in case it -rains, because Noel gets a cold on the chest at the least thing - -and we went on. - -The other side of the wall it was a stable yard, all cobble-stones. - -There was nobody about - but we could hear a man rubbing down a -horse and hissing in the stable; so we crept very quietly past, and -Alice whispered - - -''Tis the lair of the Monster Serpent; I hear his deadly hiss! -Beware! Courage and despatch!' - -We went over the stones on tiptoe, and we found another wall with -another door in it on the other side. We went through that too, on -tiptoe. It really was an adventure. And there we were in a -shrubbery, and we saw something white through the trees. Dora said -it was the white bear. That is so like Dora. She always begins to -take part in a play just when the rest of us are getting tired of -it. I don't mean this unkindly, because I am very fond of Dora. -I cannot forget how kind she was when I had bronchitis; and -ingratitude is a dreadful vice. But it is quite true. - -'It is not a bear,' said Oswald; and we all went on, still on -tiptoe, round a twisty path and on to a lawn, and there was Noel. -His collar had come undone, as I said, and he had an inky mark on -his face that he made just before we left the house, and he -wouldn't let Dora wash it off, and one of his bootlaces was coming -down. He was standing looking at a little girl; she was the -funniest little girl you ever saw. - -She was like a china doll - the sixpenny kind; she had a white -face, and long yellow hair, done up very tight in two pigtails; her -forehead was very big and lumpy, and her cheeks came high up, like -little shelves under her eyes. Her eyes were small and blue. She -had on a funny black frock, with curly braid on it, and button -boots that went almost up to her knees. Her legs were very thin. -She was sitting in a hammock chair nursing a blue kitten - not a -sky-blue one, of course, but the colour of a new slate pencil. As -we came up we heard her say to Noel - 'Who are you?' - -Noel had forgotten about the bear, and he was taking his favourite -part, so he said - 'I'm Prince Camaralzaman.' The funny little -girl looked pleased. - -'I thought at first you were a common boy,' she said. Then she saw -the rest of us and said - 'Are you all Princesses and Princes too?' -Of course we said 'Yes,' and she said - 'I am a Princess also.' -She said it very well too, exactly as if it were true. We were -very glad, because it is so seldom you meet any children who can -begin to play right off without having everything explained to -them. And even then they will say they are going to 'pretend to -be' a lion, or a witch, or a king. Now this little girl just said -'I am a Princess.' Then she looked at Oswald and said, 'I fancy -I've seen you at Baden.' Of course Oswald said, 'Very likely.' - -The little girl had a funny voice, and all her words were quite -plain, each word by itself; she didn't talk at all like we do. - - -H. O. asked her what the cat's name was, and she said 'Katinka.' -Then Dicky said - - -'Let's get away from the windows; if you play near windows some one -inside generally knocks at them and says "Don't".' -The Princess put down the cat very carefully and said - - -'I am forbidden to walk off the grass.' - -'That's a pity,' said Dora. - -'But I will if you like,' said the Princess. - -'You mustn't do things you are forbidden to do,' Dora said; but -Dicky showed us that there was some more grass beyond the shrubs -with only a gravel path between. So I lifted the Princess over the -gravel, so that she should be able to say she hadn't walked off the -grass. When we got to the other grass we all sat down, and the -Princess asked us if we liked 'dragees' (I know that's how you -spell it, for I asked Albert-next-door's uncle). - -We said we thought not, but she pulled a real silver box out of her -pocket and showed us; they were just flat, round chocolates. We -had two each. Then we asked her her name, and she began, and when -she began she went on, and on, and on, till I thought she was never -going to stop. H. O. said she had fifty names, but Dicky is very -good at figures, and he says there were only eighteen. The first -were Pauline, Alexandra, Alice, and Mary was one, and Victoria, for -we all heard that, and it ended up with Hildegarde Cunigonde -something or other, Princess of something else. - -When she'd done, H. O. said, 'That's jolly good! Say it again!' -and she did, but even then we couldn't remember it. We told her -our names, but she thought they were too short, so when it was -Noel's turn he said he was Prince Noel Camaralzaman Ivan -Constantine Charlemagne James John Edward Biggs Maximilian Bastable -Prince of Lewisham, but when she asked him to say it again of -course he could only get the first two names right, because he'd -made it up as he went on. - -So the Princess said, 'You are quite old enough to know your own -name.' She was very grave and serious. - -She told us that she was the fifth cousin of Queen Victoria. We -asked who the other cousins were, but she did not seem to -understand. She went on and said she was seven times removed. She -couldn't tell us what that meant either, but Oswald thinks it means -that the Queen's cousins are so fond of her that they will keep -coming bothering, so the Queen's servants have orders to remove -them. This little girl must have been very fond of the Queen to -try so often to see her, and to have been seven times removed. We -could see that it is considered something to be proud of; but we -thought it was hard on the Queen that her cousins wouldn't let her -alone. - -Presently the little girl asked us where our maids and governesses -were. - -We told her we hadn't any just now. And she said - -'How pleasant! And did you come here alone?' - -'Yes,' said Dora; 'we came across the Heath.' - -'You are very fortunate,' said the little girl. She sat very -upright on the grass, with her fat little hands in her lap. 'I -should like to go on the Heath. There are donkeys there, with -white saddle covers. I should like to ride them, but my governess -will not permit.' - -'I'm glad we haven't a governess,' H. O. said. 'We ride the -donkeys whenever we have any pennies, and once I gave the man -another penny to make it gallop.' - -'You are indeed fortunate!' said the Princess again, and when she -looked sad the shelves on her cheeks showed more than ever. You -could have laid a sixpence on them quite safely if you had had one. - -'Never mind,' said Noel; 'I've got a lot of money. Come out and -have a ride now.' But the little girl shook her head and said she -was afraid it would not be correct. - -Dora said she was quite right; then all of a sudden came one of -those uncomfortable times when nobody can think of anything to say, -so we sat and looked at each other. But at last Alice said we -ought to be going. - -'Do not go yet,' the little girl said. 'At what time did they -order your carriage?' - -'Our carriage is a fairy one, drawn by griffins, and it comes when -we wish for it,' said Noel. - -The little girl looked at him very queerly, and said, 'That is out -of a picture-book.' - -Then Noel said he thought it was about time he was married if we -were to be home in time for tea. The little girl was rather stupid -over it, but she did what we told her, and we married them with -Dora's pocket-handkerchief for a veil, and the ring off the back of -one of the buttons on H. O.'s blouse just went on her little -finger. - -Then we showed her how to play cross-touch, and puss in the corner, -and tag. It was funny, she didn't know any games but battledore -and shuttlecock and les graces. But she really began to laugh at -last and not to look quite so like a doll. - -She was Puss and was running after Dicky when suddenly she stopped -short and looked as if she was going to cry. And we looked too, -and there were two prim ladies with little mouths and tight hair. -One of them said in quite an awful voice, 'Pauline, who are these -children?' and her voice was gruff; with very curly R's. - -The little girl said we were Princes and Princesses - which was -silly, to a grown-up person that is not a great friend of yours. - -The gruff lady gave a short, horrid laugh, like a husky bark, and -said - - -'Princes, indeed! They're only common children!' - -Dora turned very red and began to speak, but the little girl cried -out 'Common children! Oh, I am so glad! When I am grown up I'll -always play with common children.' - -And she ran at us, and began to kiss us one by one, beginning with -Alice; she had got to H. O. when the horrid lady said - 'Your -Highness - go indoors at once!' - -The little girl answered, 'I won't!' - -Then the prim lady said - 'Wilson, carry her Highness indoors.' - -And the little girl was carried away screaming, and kicking with -her little thin legs and her buttoned boots, and between her -screams she shrieked: - -'Common children! I am glad, glad, glad! Common children! Common -children!' - -The nasty lady then remarked - 'Go at once, or I will send for the -police!' - -So we went. H. O. made a face at her and so did Alice, but Oswald -took off his cap and said he was sorry if she was annoyed about -anything; for Oswald has always been taught to be polite to ladies, -however nasty. Dicky took his off, too, when he saw me do it; he -says he did it first, but that is a mistake. If I were really a -common boy I should say it was a lie. - -Then we all came away, and when we got outside Dora said, 'So she -was really a Princess. Fancy a Princess living there!' -'Even Princesses have to live somewhere,' said Dicky. - -'And I thought it was play. And it was real. I wish I'd known! -I should have liked to ask her lots of things,' said Alice. - -H. O. said he would have liked to ask her what she had for dinner -and whether she had a crown. - -I felt, myself, we had lost a chance of finding out a great deal -about kings and queens. I might have known such a stupid-looking -little girl would never have been able to pretend, as well as that. - -So we all went home across the Heath, and made dripping toast for -tea. - -When we were eating it Noel said, 'I wish I could give her some! -It is very good.' - -He sighed as he said it, and his mouth was very full, so we knew he -was thinking of his Princess. He says now that she was as -beautiful as the day, but we remember her quite well, and she was -nothing of the kind. - - - -CHAPTER 7 -BEING BANDITS - - -Noel was quite tiresome for ever so long after we found the -Princess. He would keep on wanting to go to the Park when the rest -of us didn't, and though we went several times to please him, we -never found that door open again, and all of us except him knew -from the first that it would be no go. - -So now we thought it was time to do something to rouse him from the -stupor of despair, which is always done to heroes when anything -baffling has occurred. Besides, we were getting very short of -money again - the fortunes of your house cannot be restored (not so -that they will last, that is), even by the one pound eight we got -when we had the 'good hunting.' We spent a good deal of that on -presents for Father's birthday. We got him a paper-weight, like a -glass bun, with a picture of Lewisham Church at the bottom; and a -blotting-pad, and a box of preserved fruits, and an ivory penholder -with a view of Greenwich Park in the little hole where you look -through at the top. He was most awfully pleased and surprised, and -when he heard how Noel and Oswald had earned the money to buy the -things he was more surprised still. Nearly all the rest of our -money went to get fireworks for the Fifth of November. We got six -Catherine wheels and four rockets; two hand-lights, one red and one -green; a sixpenny maroon; two Roman-candles - they cost a shilling; -some Italian streamers, a fairy fountain, and a tourbillon that -cost eighteen-pence and was very nearly worth it. - -But I think crackers and squibs are a mistake. It's true you get -a lot of them for the money, and they are not bad fun for the first -two or three dozen, but you get jolly sick of them before you've -let off your sixpenn'orth. And the only amusing way is not -allowed: it is putting them in the fire. - -It always seems a long time till the evening when you have got -fireworks in the house, and I think as it was a rather foggy day we -should have decided to let them off directly after breakfast, only -Father had said he would help us to let them off at eight o'clock -after he had had his dinner, and you ought never to disappoint your -father if you can help it. - -You see we had three good reasons for trying H. O.'s idea of -restoring the fallen fortunes of our house by becoming bandits on -the Fifth of November. We had a fourth reason as well, and that -was the best reason of the lot. You remember Dora thought it would -be wrong to be bandits. And the Fifth of November came while Dora -was away at Stroud staying with her godmother. Stroud is in -Gloucestershire. We were determined to do it while she was out of -the way, because we did not think it wrong, and besides we meant to -do it anyhow. - -We held a Council, of course, and laid our plans very carefully. -We let H. O. be Captain, because it was his idea. Oswald was -Lieutenant. Oswald was quite fair, because he let H. O. call -himself Captain; but Oswald is the eldest next to Dora, after all. - -Our plan was this. We were all to go up on to the Heath. Our -house is in the Lewisham Road, but it's quite close to the Heath if -you cut up the short way opposite the confectioner's, past the -nursery gardens and the cottage hospital, and turn to the left -again and afterwards to the right. You come out then at the top of -the hill, where the big guns are with the iron fence round them, -and where the bands play on Thursday evenings in the summer. - -We were to lurk in ambush there, and waylay an unwary traveller. -We were to call upon him to surrender his arms, and then bring him -home and put him in the deepest dungeon below the castle moat; then -we were to load him with chains and send to his friends for ransom. - -You may think we had no chains, but you are wrong, because we used -to keep two other dogs once, besides Pincher, before the fall of -the fortunes of the ancient House of Bastable. And they were quite -big dogs. - -It was latish in the afternoon before we started. We thought we -could lurk better if it was nearly dark. It was rather foggy, and -we waited a good while beside the railings, but all the belated -travellers were either grown up or else they were Board School -children. We weren't going to get into a row with grown-up people -- especially strangers - and no true bandit would ever stoop to ask -a ransom from the relations of the poor and needy. So we thought -it better to wait. - -As I said, it was Guy Fawkes Day, and if it had not been we should -never have been able to be bandits at all, for the unwary traveller -we did catch had been forbidden to go out because he had a cold in -his head. But he would run out to follow a guy, without even -putting on a coat or a comforter, and it was a very damp, foggy -afternoon and nearly dark, so you see it was his own fault -entirely, and served him jolly well right. - -We saw him coming over the Heath just as we were deciding to go -home to tea. He had followed that guy right across to the village -(we call Blackheath the village; I don't know why), and he was -coming back dragging his feet and sniffing. - -'Hist, an unwary traveller approaches!' whispered Oswald. -'Muffle your horses' heads and see to the priming of your pistols,' -muttered Alice. She always will play boys' parts, and she makes -Ellis cut her hair short on purpose. Ellis is a very obliging -hairdresser. - -'Steal softly upon him,' said Noel; 'for lo! 'tis dusk, and no -human eyes can mark our deeds.' So we ran out and surrounded the -unwary traveller. it turned out to be Albert-next-door, and he was -very frightened indeed until he saw who we were. - -'Surrender!' hissed Oswald, in a desperate-sounding voice, as he -caught the arm of the Unwary. And Albert-next-door said, 'All -right! I'm surrendering as hard as I can. You needn't pull my arm -off.' - -We explained to him that resistance was useless, and I think he saw -that from the first. We held him tight by both arms, and we -marched him home down the hill in a hollow square of five. - -He wanted to tell us about the guy, but we made him see that it was -not proper for prisoners to talk to the guard, especially about -guys that the prisoner had been told not to go after because of his -cold. - -When we got to where we live he said, 'All right, I don't want to -tell you. You'll wish I had afterwards. You never saw such a -guy.' - -'I can see you!' said H. O. It was very rude, and Oswald told him -so at once, because it is his duty as an elder brother. But H. O. -is very young and does not know better yet, and besides it wasn't -bad for H. O. - -Albert-next-door said, 'You haven't any manners, and I want to go -in to my tea. Let go of me!' - -But Alice told him, quite kindly, that he was not going in to his -tea, but coming with us. - -'I'm not,' said Albert-next-door; 'I'm going home. Leave go! I've -got a bad cold. You're making it worse.' Then he tried to cough, -which was very silly, because we'd seen him in the morning, and -he'd told us where the cold was that he wasn't to go out with. -When he had tried to cough, he said, 'Leave go of me! You see my -cold's getting worse.' - -'You should have thought of that before,' said Dicky; 'you're -coming in with us.' - -'Don't be a silly,' said Noel; 'you know we told you at the very -beginning that resistance was useless. There is no disgrace in -yielding. We are five to your one.' - -By this time Eliza had opened the door, and we thought it best to -take him in without any more parlaying. To parley with a prisoner -is not done by bandits. - -Directly we got him safe into the nursery, H. O. began to jump -about and say, 'Now you're a prisoner really and truly!' - -And Albert-next-door began to cry. He always does. I wonder he -didn't begin long before - but Alice fetched him one of the dried -fruits we gave Father for his birthday. It was a green walnut. I -have noticed the walnuts and the plums always get left till the -last in the box; the apricots go first, and then the figs and -pears; and the cherries, if there are any. - -So he ate it and shut up. Then we explained his position to him, -so that there should be no mistake, and he couldn't say afterwards -that he had not understood. - -'There will be no violence,' said Oswald - he was now Captain of -the Bandits, because we all know H. O. likes to be Chaplain when we -play prisoners - 'no violence. But you will be confined in a dark, -subterranean dungeon where toads and snakes crawl, and but little -of the light of day filters through the heavily mullioned windows. -You will be loaded with chains. Now don't begin again, Baby, -there's nothing to cry about; straw will be your pallet; beside you -the gaoler will set a ewer - a ewer is only a jug, stupid; it won't -eat you - a ewer with water; and a mouldering crust will be your -food.' - -But Albert-next-door never enters into the spirit of a thing. He -mumbled something about tea-time. - -Now Oswald, though stern, is always just, and besides we were all -rather hungry, and tea was ready. So we had it at once, -Albert-next-door and all - and we gave him what was left of the -four-pound jar of apricot jam we got with the money Noel got for -his poetry. And we saved our crusts for the prisoner. - -Albert-next-door was very tiresome. Nobody could have had a nicer -prison than he had. We fenced him into a corner with the old wire -nursery fender and all the chairs, instead of putting him in the -coal-cellar as we had first intended. And when he said the -dog-chains were cold the girls were kind enough to warm his fetters -thoroughly at the fire before we put them on him. - -We got the straw cases of some bottles of wine someone sent Father -one Christmas - it is some years ago, but the cases are quite good. - -We unpicked them very carefully and pulled them to pieces and -scattered the straw about. It made a lovely straw pallet, and took -ever so long to make - but Albert-next-door has yet to learn what -gratitude really is. We got the bread trencher for the wooden -platter where the prisoner's crusts were put - they were not -mouldy, but we could not wait till they got so, and for the ewer we -got the toilet jug out of the spare-room where nobody ever sleeps. -And even then Albert-next-door couldn't be happy like the rest of -us. He howled and cried and tried to get out, and he knocked the -ewer over and stamped on the mouldering crusts. Luckily there was -no water in the ewer because we had forgotten it, only dust and -spiders. So we tied him up with the clothes-line from the back -kitchen, and we had to hurry up, which was a pity for him. We -might have had him rescued by a devoted page if he hadn't been so -tiresome. In fact Noel was actually dressing up for the page when -Albert-next-door kicked over the prison ewer. - -We got a sheet of paper out of an old exercise-book, and we made H. -O. prick his own thumb, because he is our little brother and it is -our duty to teach him to be brave. We none of us mind pricking -ourselves; we've done it heaps of times. H. O. didn't like it, but -he agreed to do it, and I helped him a little because he was so -slow, and when he saw the red bead of blood getting fatter and -bigger as I squeezed his thumb he was very pleased, just as I had -told him he would be. - -This is what we wrote with H. O.'s blood, only the blood gave out -when we got to 'Restored', and we had to write the rest with -crimson lake, which is not the same colour, though I always use it, -myself, for painting wounds. - -While Oswald was writing it he heard Alice whispering to the -prisoner that it would soon be over, and it was only play. The -prisoner left off howling, so I pretended not to hear what she -said. A Bandit Captain has to overlook things sometimes. This was -the letter - - - -'Albert Morrison is held a prisoner by Bandits. On payment of -three thousand pounds he will be restored to his sorrowing -relatives, and all will be forgotten and forgiven.' - - -I was not sure about the last part, but Dicky was certain he had -seen it in the paper, so I suppose it must have been all right. - -We let H. O. take the letter; it was only fair, as it was his blood -it was written with, and told him to leave it next door for Mrs -Morrison. - -H. O. came back quite quickly, and Albert-next-door's uncle came -with him. - -'What is all this, Albert?' he cried. 'Alas, alas, my nephew! Do -I find you the prisoner of a desperate band of brigands?' - -'Bandits,' said H. O; 'you know it says bandits.' - -'I beg your pardon, gentlemen,' said Albert-next-door's uncle, -'bandits it is, of course. This, Albert, is the direct result of -the pursuit of the guy on an occasion when your doting mother had -expressly warned you to forgo the pleasures of the chase.' - -Albert said it wasn't his fault, and he hadn't wanted to play. - -'So ho!' said his uncle, 'impenitent too! Where's the dungeon?' - -We explained the dungeon, and showed him the straw pallet and the -ewer and the mouldering crusts and other things. - -'Very pretty and complete,' he said. 'Albert, you are more highly -privileged than ever I was. No one ever made me a nice dungeon -when I was your age. I think I had better leave you where you -are.' - -Albert began to cry again and said he was sorry, and he would be a -good boy. - -'And on this old familiar basis you expect me to ransom you, do -you? Honestly, my nephew, I doubt whether you are worth it. -Besides, the sum mentioned in this document strikes me as -excessive: Albert really is not worth three thousand pounds. Also -by a strange and unfortunate chance I haven't the money about me. -Couldn't you take less?' - -We said perhaps we could. - -'Say eightpence,' suggested Albert-next-door's uncle, 'which is all -the small change I happen to have on my person.' - -'Thank you very much,' said Alice as he held it out; 'but are you -sure you can spare it? Because really it was only play.' - -'Quite sure. Now, Albert, the game is over. You had better run -home to your mother and tell her how much you've enjoyed yourself.' - -When Albert-next-door had gone his uncle sat in the Guy Fawkes -armchair and took Alice on his knee, and we sat round the fire -waiting till it would be time to let off our fireworks. We roasted -the chestnuts he sent Dicky out for, and he told us stories till it -was nearly seven. His stories are first-rate - he does all the -parts in different voices. At last he said - - -'Look here, young-uns. I like to see you play and enjoy -yourselves, and I don't think it hurts Albert to enjoy himself -too.' - -'I don't think he did much,' said H. O. But I knew what -Albert-next-door's uncle meant because I am much older than H. O. -He went on - - -'But what about Albert's mother? Didn't you think how anxious she -would be at his not coming home? As it happens I saw him come in -with you, so we knew it was all right. But if I hadn't, eh?' - -He only talks like that when he is very serious, or even angry. -Other times he talks like people in books - to us, I mean. - -We none of us said anything. But I was thinking. Then Alice -spoke. - -Girls seem not to mind saying things that we don't say. She put -her arms round Albert-next-door's uncle's neck and said - - -'We're very, very sorry. We didn't think about his mother. You -see we try very hard not to think about other people's mothers -because -' - -Just then we heard Father's key in the door and Albert-next-door's -uncle kissed Alice and put her down, and we all went down to meet -Father. As we went I thought I heard Albert-next-door's uncle say -something that sounded like 'Poor little beggars!' - -He couldn't have meant us, when we'd been having such a jolly time, -and chestnuts, and fireworks to look forward to after dinner and -everything! - - - -CHAPTER 8 -BEING EDITORS - - -It was Albert's uncle who thought of our trying a newspaper. He -said he thought we should not find the bandit business a paying -industry, as a permanency, and that journalism might be. - -We had sold Noel's poetry and that piece of information about Lord -Tottenham to the good editor, so we thought it would not be a bad -idea to have a newspaper of our own. We saw plainly that editors -must be very rich and powerful, because of the grand office and the -man in the glass case, like a museum, and the soft carpets and big -writing-table. Besides our having seen a whole handful of money -that the editor pulled out quite carelessly from his trousers -pocket when he gave me my five bob. -Dora wanted to be editor and so did Oswald, but he gave way to her -because she is a girl, and afterwards he knew that it is true what -it says in the copy-books about Virtue being its own Reward. -Because you've no idea what a bother it is. Everybody wanted to -put in everything just as they liked, no matter how much room there -was on the page. It was simply awful! Dora put up with it as long -as she could and then she said if she wasn't let alone she wouldn't -go on being editor; they could be the paper's editors themselves, -so there. - -Then Oswald said, like a good brother: 'I will help you if you -like, Dora,' and she said, 'You're more trouble than all the rest -of them! Come and be editor and see how you like it. I give it up -to you.' But she didn't, and we did it together. We let -Albert-next-door be sub-editor, because he had hurt his foot with -a nail in his boot that gathered. - -When it was done Albert-next-door's uncle had it copied for us in -typewriting, and we sent copies to all our friends, and then of -course there was no one left that we could ask to buy it. We did -not think of that until too late. We called the paper the Lewisham -Recorder; Lewisham because we live there, and Recorder in memory of -the good editor. I could write a better paper on my head, but an -editor is not allowed to write all the paper. It is very hard, but -he is not. You just have to fill up with what you can get from -other writers. If I ever have time I will write a paper all by -myself. It won't be patchy. We had no time to make it an -illustrated paper, but I drew the ship going down with all hands -for the first copy. But the typewriter can't draw ships, so it was -left out in the other copies. The time the first paper took to -write out no one would believe! This was the Newspaper: - - - - -EDITORS: DORA AND OSWALD BASTABLE - - -Editorial Note - -Every paper is written for some reason. Ours is because we want to -sell it and get money. If what we have written brings happiness to -any sad heart we shall not have laboured in vain. But we want the -money too. Many papers are content with the sad heart and the -happiness, but we are not like that, and it is best not to be -deceitful. EDITORS. - - -There will be two serial stories; One by Dicky and one by all of -us. In a serial story you only put in one chapter at a time. But -we shall put all our serial story at once, if Dora has time to copy -it. Dicky's will come later on. - - -Serial Story - -BY US ALL - -CHAPTER I - by Dora - -The sun was setting behind a romantic-looking tower when two -strangers might have been observed descending the crest of the -hill. The eldest, a man in the prime of life; the other a handsome -youth who reminded everybody of Quentin Durward. They approached -the Castle, in which the fair Lady Alicia awaited her deliverers. -She leaned from the castellated window and waved her lily hand as -they approached. They returned her signal, and retired to seek -rest and refreshment at a neighbouring hostelry. - -CHAPTER II - by Alice - -The Princess was very uncomfortable in the tower, because her fairy -godmother had told her all sorts of horrid things would happen if -she didn't catch a mouse every day, and she had caught so many mice -that now there were hardly any left to catch. So she sent her -carrier pigeon to ask the noble Strangers if they could send her a -few mice - because she would be of age in a few days and then it -wouldn't matter. So the fairy godmother -- (I'm very sorry, but -there's no room to make the chapters any longer. ED.) - -CHAPTER III - by the Sub-Editor - -(I can't - I'd much rather not - I don't know how.) - - -CHAPTER IV - by Dicky - -I must now retrace my steps and tell you something about our hero. -You must know he had been to an awfully jolly school, where they -had turkey and goose every day for dinner, and never any mutton, -and as many helps of pudding as a fellow cared to send up his plate -for - so of course they had all grown up very strong, and before he -left school he challenged the Head to have it out man to man, and -he gave it him, I tell you. That was the education that made him -able to fight Red Indians, and to be the stranger who might have -been observed in the first chapter. - - -CHAPTER V - by Noel - -I think it's time something happened in this story. So then the -dragon he came out, blowing fire out of his nose, and he said - - -'Come on, you valiant man and true, -I'd like to have a set-to along of you!' - -(That's bad English. ED. I don't care; it's what the dragon said. - -Who told you dragons didn't talk bad English? NOEL.) - -So the hero, whose name was Noeloninuris, replied - - -'My blade is sharp, my axe is keen, -You're not nearly as big as a good many dragons I've seen.' - -(Don't put in so much poetry, Noel. It's not fair, because none of -the others can do it. ED.) - -And then they went at it, and he beat the dragon, just as he did -the Head in Dicky's part of the Story, and so he married the -Princess, and they lived -- (No they didn't - not till the last -chapter. ED.) - -CHAPTER VI - by H. O. - -I think it's a very nice Story - but what about the mice? I don't -want to say any more. Dora can have what's left of my chapter. - - -CHAPTER VII - by the Editors - - -And so when the dragon was dead there were lots of mice, because he -used to kill them for his tea but now they rapidly multiplied and -ravaged the country, so the fair lady Alicia, sometimes called the -Princess, had to say she would not marry any one unless they could -rid the country of this plague of mice. Then the Prince, whose -real name didn't begin with N, but was Osrawalddo, waved his magic -sword, and the dragon stood before them, bowing gracefully. They -made him promise to be good, and then they forgave him; and when -the wedding breakfast came, all the bones were saved for him. And -so they were married and lived happy ever after. - -(What became of the other stranger? NOEL. -The dragon ate him because he asked too many questions. EDITORS.) - -This is the end of the story. - - - -Instructive - -it only takes four hours and a quarter now to get from London to -Manchester; but I should not think any one would if they could help -it. - - -A dreadful warning. A wicked boy told me a very instructive thing -about ginger. They had opened one of the large jars, and he -happened to take out quite a lot, and he made it all right by -dropping marbles in, till there was as much ginger as before. But -he told me that on the Sunday, when it was coming near the part -where there is only juice generally, I had no idea what his -feelings were. I don't see what he could have said when they asked -him. I should be sorry to act like it. - - - -Scientific - -Experiments should always be made out of doors. And don't use -benzoline. -DICKY. -(That was when he burnt his eyebrows off. ED.) - - -The earth is 2,400 miles round, and 800 through - at least I think -so, but perhaps it's the other way. -DICKY. -(You ought to have been sure before you began. ED.) - - - -Scientific Column - -in this so-called Nineteenth Century Science is but too little -considered in the nurseries of the rich and proud. But we are not -like that. - -It is not generally known that if you put bits of camphor in -luke-warm water it will move about. If you drop sweet oil in, the -camphor will dart away and then stop moving. But don't drop any -till you are tired of it, because the camphor won't any more -afterwards. Much amusement and instruction is lost by not knowing -things like this. - -If you put a sixpence under a shilling in a wine-glass, and blow -hard down the side of the glass, the sixpence will jump up and sit -on the top of the shilling. At least I can't do it myself, but my -cousin can. He is in the Navy. - - - -Answers to Correspondents - -Noel. You are very poetical, but I am sorry to say it will not do. - -Alice. Nothing will ever make your hair curl, so it's no use. -Some people say it's more important to tidy up as you go along. I -don't mean you in particular, but every one. - -H. O. We never said you were tubby, but the Editor does not know -any cure. - -Noel. If there is any of the paper over when this newspaper is -finished, I will exchange it for your shut-up inkstand, or the -knife that has the useful thing in it for taking stones out of -horses' feet, but you can't have it without. - -H. O. There are many ways how your steam engine might stop working. - -You might ask Dicky. He knows one of them. I think it is the way -yours stopped. - -Noel. If you think that by filling the garden with sand you can -make crabs build their nests there you are not at all sensible. - -You have altered your poem about the battle of Waterloo so often, -that we cannot read it except where the Duke waves his sword and -says some thing we can't read either. Why did you write it on -blotting-paper with purple chalk? ED. -(Because YOU KNOW WHO sneaked my pencil. NOEL.) - - -Poetry - - -The Assyrian came down like a wolf on the fold, -And the way he came down was awful, I'm told; -But it's nothing to the way one of the Editors comes down on me, -If I crumble my bread-and-butter or spill my tea. -NOEL. - - - -Curious Facts - -If you hold a guinea-pig up by his tail his eyes drop out. - -You can't do half the things yourself that children in books do, -making models or soon. I wonder why? -ALICE. - - -If you take a date's stone out and put in an almond and eat them -together, it is prime. I found this out. -SUB-EDITOR. - -If you put your wet hand into boiling lead it will not hurt you if -you draw it out quickly enough. I have never tried this. -DORA. - - -The Purring Class - -(INSTRUCTIVE ARTICLE) - -If I ever keep a school everything shall be quite different. -Nobody shall learn anything they don't want to. And sometimes -instead of having masters and mistresses we will have cats, and we -will dress up in cat skins and learn purring. 'Now, my dears,' the -old cat will say, one, two, three all purr together,' and we shall -purr like anything. - -She won't teach us to mew, but we shall know how without teaching. -Children do know some things without being taught. -ALICE. - - -Poetry -(TRANSLATED INTO FRENCH BY DORA) - -Quand j'etais jeune et j'etais fou -J'achetai un violon pour dix-huit sous -Et tous les airs que je jouai -Etait over the hills and far away. - -ANOTHER PIECE OF IT - -Mercie jolie vache qui fait -Bon lait pour mon dejeuner -Tous les matins tous les soirs -Mon pain je mange, ton lait je boire. - - - -Recreations - -It is a mistake to think that cats are playful. I often try to get -a cat to play with me, and she never seems to care about the game, -no matter how little it hurts. -H. O. - -Making pots and pans with clay is fun, but do not tell the -grown-ups. It is better to surprise them; and then you must say at -once how easily it washes off - much easier than ink. -DICKY. - - - -Sam Redfern, or the Bush ranger's Burial - - -BY DICKY - -'Well, Annie, I have bad news for you,' said Mr Ridgway, as he -entered the comfortable dining-room of his cabin in the Bush. 'Sam -Redfern the Bushranger is about this part of the Bush just now. I -hope he will not attack us with his gang.' - -'I hope not,' responded Annie, a gentle maiden of some sixteen -summers. - -just then came a knock at the door of the hut, and a gruff voice -asked them to open the door. - -'It is Sam Redfern the Bushranger, father,' said the girl. - -'The same,' responded the voice, and the next moment the hall door -was smashed in, and Sam Redfern sprang in, followed by his gang. - - -CHAPTER II - -Annie's Father was at once overpowered, and Annie herself lay bound -with cords on the drawing-room sofa. Sam Redfern set a guard round -the lonely hut, and all human aid was despaired of. But you never -know. Far away in the Bush a different scene was being enacted. -'Must be Injuns,' said a tall man to himself as he pushed his way -through the brushwood. It was Jim Carlton, the celebrated -detective. 'I know them,' he added; 'they are Apaches.' just then -ten Indians in full war-paint appeared. Carlton raised his rifle -and fired, and slinging their scalps on his arm he hastened towards -the humble log hut where resided his affianced bride, Annie -Ridgway, sometimes known as the Flower of the Bush. - - -CHAPTER III - -The moon was low on the horizon, and Sam Redfern was seated at a -drinking bout with some of his boon companions. - -They had rifled the cellars of the hut, and the rich wines flowed -like water in the golden goblets of Mr Ridgway. - -But Annie had made friends with one of the gang, a noble, -good-hearted man who had joined Sam Redfern by mistake, and she had -told him to go and get the police as quickly as possible. - -'Ha! ha!' cried Redfern, 'now I am enjoying myself!' He little knew -that his doom was near upon him. - -Just then Annie gave a piercing scream, and Sam Redfern got up, -seizing his revolver. 'Who are you?' he cried, as a man entered. - -'I am Jim Carlton, the celebrated detective,' said the new arrival. - -Sam Redfern's revolver dropped from his nerveless fingers, but the -next moment he had sprung upon the detective with the well-known -activity of the mountain sheep, and Annie shrieked, for she had -grown to love the rough Bushranger. - -(To be continued at the end of the paper if there is room.) - - - -Scholastic -A new slate is horrid till it is washed in milk. I like the green -spots on them to draw patterns round. I know a good way to make a -slate-pencil squeak, but I won't put it in because I don't want to -make it common. SUB-EDITOR. - -Peppermint is a great help with arithmetic. The boy who was second -in the Oxford Local always did it. He gave me two. The examiner -said to him, 'Are you eating peppermints?' And he said, 'No, Sir.' - -He told me afterwards it was quite true, because he was only -sucking one. I'm glad I wasn't asked. I should never have thought -of that, and I could have had to say 'Yes.' -OSWALD. - - - -The Wreck of the 'Malabar' - -BY NOEL (Author of 'A Dream of Ancient Ancestors.') He isn't really -- but he put it in to make it seem more real. - -Hark! what is that noise of rolling -Waves and thunder in the air? -'Tis the death-knell of the sailors -And officers and passengers of the good ship Malabar. - -It was a fair and lovely noon -When the good ship put out of port -And people said 'ah little we think -How soon she will be the elements' sport.' - -She was indeed a lovely sight -Upon the billows with sails spread. -But the captain folded his gloomy arms, -Ah - if she had been a life-boat instead! - -See the captain stern yet gloomy -Flings his son upon a rock, -Hoping that there his darling boy -May escape the wreck. - -Alas in vain the loud winds roared -And nobody was saved. -That was the wreck of the Malabar, -Then let us toll for the brave. -NOEL. - - - -Gardening Notes - -It is useless to plant cherry-stones in the hope of eating the -fruit, because they don't! - -Alice won't lend her gardening tools again, because the last time -Noel left them out in the rain, and I don't like it. He said he -didn't. - - -Seeds and Bulbs - -These are useful to play at shop with, until you are ready. Not at -dinner-parties, for they will not grow unless uncooked. Potatoes -are not grown with seed, but with chopped-up potatoes. Apple trees -are grown from twigs, which is less wasteful. - -Oak trees come from acorns. Every one knows this. When Noel says -he could grow one from a peach stone wrapped up in oak leaves, he -shows that he knows nothing about gardening but marigolds, and when -I passed by his garden I thought they seemed just like weeds now -the flowers have been picked. - -A boy once dared me to eat a bulb. - -Dogs are very industrious and fond of gardening. Pincher is always -planting bones, but they never grow up. There couldn't be a bone -tree. I think this is what makes him bark so unhappily at night. -He has never tried planting dog-biscuit, but he is fonder of bones, -and perhaps he wants to be quite sure about them first. - - - -Sam Redfern, or the Bushranger's Burial - -BY DICKY - - -CHAPTER IV AND LAST - -This would have been a jolly good story if they had let me finish -it at the beginning of the paper as I wanted to. But now I have -forgotten how I meant it to end, and I have lost my book about Red -Indians, and all my Boys of England have been sneaked. The girls -say 'Good riddance!' so I expect they did it. They want me just to -put in which Annie married, but I shan't, so they will never know. - - -We have now put everything we can think of into the paper. It -takes a lot of thinking about. I don't know how grown-ups manage -to write all they do. It must make their heads ache, especially -lesson books. - -Albert-next-door only wrote one chapter of the serial story, but he -could have done some more if he had wanted to. He could not write -out any of the things because he cannot spell. He says he can, but -it takes him such a long time he might just as well not be able. -There are one or two things more. I am sick of it, but Dora says -she will write them in. - -Legal answer wanted. A quantity of excellent string is offered if -you know whether there really is a law passed about not buying -gunpowder under thirteen. -DICKY. - -The price of this paper is one shilling each, and sixpence extra -for the picture of the Malabar going down with all hands. If we -sell one hundred copies we will write another paper. - - - - -And so we would have done, but we never did. Albert-next-door's -uncle gave us two shillings, that was all. You can't restore -fallen fortunes with two shillings! - - - -CHAPTER 9 -THE G. B. - - -Being editors is not the best way to wealth. We all feel this now, -and highwaymen are not respected any more like they used to be. - -I am sure we had tried our best to restore our fallen fortunes. We -felt their fall very much, because we knew the Bastables had been -rich once. Dora and Oswald can remember when Father was always -bringing nice things home from London, and there used to be turkeys -and geese and wine and cigars come by the carrier at -Christmas-time, and boxes of candied fruit and French plums in -ornamental boxes with silk and velvet and gilding on them. They -were called prunes, but the prunes you buy at the grocer's are -quite different. But now there is seldom anything nice brought -from London, and the turkey and the prune people have forgotten -Father's address. - -'How can we restore those beastly fallen fortunes?' said Oswald. -'We've tried digging and writing and princesses and being editors.' - -'And being bandits,' said H. O. - -'When did you try that?' asked Dora quickly. 'You know I told you -it was wrong.' - -'It wasn't wrong the way we did it,' said Alice, quicker still, -before Oswald could say, 'Who asked you to tell us anything about -it?' which would have been rude, and he is glad he didn't. 'We -only caught Albert-next-door.' - -'Oh, Albert-next-door!' said Dora contemptuously, and I felt more -comfortable; for even after I didn't say, 'Who asked you, and -cetera,' I was afraid Dora was going to come the good elder sister -over us. She does that a jolly sight too often. - -Dicky looked up from the paper he was reading and said, 'This -sounds likely,' and he read out - - - -l100 secures partnership in lucrative business for sale of useful -patent. l10 weekly. No personal attendance necessary. Jobbins, -300, Old Street Road. - - -'I wish we could secure that partnership,' said Oswald. He is -twelve, and a very thoughtful boy for his age. - -Alice looked up from her painting. She was trying to paint a fairy -queen's frock with green bice, and it wouldn't rub. There is -something funny about green bice. It never will rub off; no matter -how expensive your paintbox is - and even boiling water is very -little use. - -She said, 'Bother the bice! And, Oswald, it's no use thinking -about that. Where are we to get a hundred pounds?' - -'Ten pounds a week is five pounds to us,' Oswald went on - he had -done the sum in his head while Alice was talking - 'because -partnership means halves. It would be l5.' - -Noel sat sucking his pencil - he had been writing poetry as usual. -I saw the first two lines - - - -I wonder why Green Bice -Is never very nice. - - -Suddenly he said, 'I wish a fairy would come down the chimney and -drop a jewel on the table - a jewel worth just a hundred pounds.' - -'She might as well give you the hundred pounds while she was about -it,' said Dora. - -'Or while she was about it she might as well give us five pounds a -week,' said Alice. 'Or fifty,' said I. 'Or five hundred,' said -Dicky. - -I saw H. O. open his mouth, and I knew he was going to say, 'Or -five thousand,' so I said: - -'Well, she won't give us fivepence, but if you'd only do as I am -always saying, and rescue a wealthy old gentleman from deadly peril -he would give us a pot of money, and we could have the partnership -and five pounds a week. Five pounds a week would buy a great many -things.' - -Then Dicky said, 'Why shouldn't we borrow it?' So we said, 'Who -from?' and then he read this out of the paper - - - -MONEY PRIVATELY WITHOUT FEEs - -THE BOND STREET BANK - -Manager, Z. Rosenbaum. - -Advances cash from l20 to l10,000 on ladies' or gentlemen's note of -hand alone, without security. No fees. No inquiries. Absolute -privacy guaranteed. - - -'What does it all mean?' asked H. O. - -'It means that there is a kind gentleman who has a lot of money, -and he doesn't know enough poor people to help, so he puts it in -the paper that he will help them, by lending them his money - -that's it, isn't it, Dicky?' - -Dora explained this and Dicky said, 'Yes.' And H. O. said he was -a Generous Benefactor, like in Miss Edgeworth. Then Noel wanted to -know what a note of hand was, and Dicky knew that, because he had -read it in a book, and it was just a letter saying you will pay the -money when you can, and signed with your name. - -'No inquiries!' said Alice. 'Oh - Dicky - do you think he would?' - -'Yes, I think so,' said Dicky. 'I wonder Father doesn't go to this -kind gentleman. I've seen his name before on a circular in -Father's study.' - -'Perhaps he has.' said Dora. - -But the rest of us were sure he hadn't, because, of course, if he -had, there would have been more money to buy nice things. just -then Pincher jumped up and knocked over the painting-water. He is -a very careless dog. I wonder why painting-water is always such an -ugly colour? Dora ran for a duster to wipe it up, and H. O. -dropped drops of the water on his hands and said he had got the -plague. So we played at the plague for a bit, and I was an Arab -physician with a bath-towel turban, and cured the plague with magic -acid-drops. After that it was time for dinner, and after dinner we -talked it all over and settled that we would go and see the -Generous Benefactor the very next day. But we thought perhaps the -G. B. - it is short for Generous Benefactor - would not like it if -there were so many of us. I have often noticed that it is the -worst of our being six - people think six a great many, when it's -children. That sentence looks wrong somehow. I mean they don't -mind six pairs of boots, or six pounds of apples, or six oranges, -especially in equations, but they seem to think you ought not to -have five brothers and sisters. Of course Dicky was to go, because -it was his idea. Dora had to go to Blackheath to see an old lady, -a friend of Father's, so she couldn't go. Alice said she ought to -go, because it said, 'Ladies and gentlemen,' and perhaps the G. B. -wouldn't let us have the money unless there were both kinds of us. - -H. O. said Alice wasn't a lady; and she said he wasn't going, -anyway. Then he called her a disagreeable cat, and she began to -cry. - -But Oswald always tries to make up quarrels, so he said - - -'You're little sillies, both of you!' - -And Dora said, 'Don't cry, Alice; he only meant you weren't a -grown-up lady.' -Then H. O. said, 'What else did you think I meant, Disagreeable?' - -So Dicky said, 'Don't be disagreeable yourself, H. O. Let her alone -and say you're sorry, or I'll jolly well make you!' - -So H. O. said he was sorry. Then Alice kissed him and said she was -sorry too; and after that H. O. gave her a hug, and said, 'Now I'm -really and truly sorry,' So it was all right. - -Noel went the last time any of us went to London, so he was out of -it, and Dora said she would take him to Blackheath if we'd take H. -O. So as there'd been a little disagreeableness we thought it was -better to take him, and we did. At first we thought we'd tear our -oldest things a bit more, and put some patches of different colours -on them, to show the G. B. how much we wanted money. But Dora said -that would be a sort of cheating, pretending we were poorer than we -are. And Dora is right sometimes, though she is our elder sister. -Then we thought we'd better wear our best things, so that the G. B. -might see we weren't so very poor that he couldn't trust us to pay -his money back when we had it. But Dora said that would be wrong -too. So it came to our being quite honest, as Dora said, and going -just as we were, without even washing our faces and hands; but when -I looked at H. O. in the train I wished we had not been quite so -particularly honest. - -Every one who reads this knows what it is like to go in the train, -so I shall not tell about it - though it was rather fun, especially -the part where the guard came for the tickets at Waterloo, and H. -O. was under the seat and pretended to be a dog without a ticket. -We went to Charing Cross, and we just went round to Whitehall to -see the soldiers and then by St James's for the same reason - and -when we'd looked in the shops a bit we got to Brook Street, Bond -Street. It was a brass plate on a door next to a shop - a very -grand place, where they sold bonnets and hats - all very bright and -smart, and no tickets on them to tell you the price. We rang a -bell and a boy opened the door and we asked for Mr Rosenbaum. The -boy was not polite; he did not ask us in. So then Dicky gave him -his visiting card; it was one of Father's really, but the name is -the same, Mr Richard Bastable, and we others wrote our names -underneath. I happened to have a piece of pink chalk in my pocket -and we wrote them with that. - -Then the boy shut the door in our faces and we waited on the step. -But presently he came down and asked our business. So Dicky said -- - -'Money advanced, young shaver! and don't be all day about it!' - -And then he made us wait again, till I was quite stiff in my legs, -but Alice liked it because of looking at the hats and bonnets, and -at last the door opened, and the boy said - - -'Mr Rosenbaum will see you,' so we wiped our feet on the mat, which -said so, and we went up stairs with soft carpets and into a room. -It was a beautiful room. I wished then we had put on our best -things, or at least washed a little. But it was too late now. - -The room had velvet curtains and a soft, soft carpet, and it was -full of the most splendid things. Black and gold cabinets, and -china, and statues, and pictures. There was a picture of a cabbage -and a pheasant and a dead hare that was just like life, and I would -have given worlds to have it for my own. The fur was so natural I -should never have been tired of looking at it; but Alice liked the -one of the girl with the broken jug best. Then besides the -pictures there were clocks and candlesticks and vases, and gilt -looking-glasses, and boxes of cigars and scent and things littered -all over the chairs and tables. It was a wonderful place, and in -the middle of all the splendour was a little old gentleman with a -very long black coat and a very long white beard and a hookey nose -- like a falcon. And he put on a pair of gold spectacles and -looked at us as if he knew exactly how much our clothes were worth. - -And then, while we elder ones were thinking how to begin, for we -had all said 'Good morning' as we came in, of course, H. O. began -before we could stop him. He said: - -'Are you the G. B.?' - -'The what?' said the little old gentleman. - -'The G. B.,' said H. O., and I winked at him to shut up, but he -didn't see me, and the G. B. did. He waved his hand at me to shut -up, so I had to, and H. O. went on - 'It stands for Generous -Benefactor.' - -The old gentleman frowned. Then he said, 'Your Father sent you -here, I suppose?' - -'No he didn't,' said Dicky. 'Why did you think so?' - -The old gentleman held out the card, and I explained that we took -that because Father's name happens to be the same as Dicky's. -'Doesn't he know you've come?' -'No,' said Alice, 'we shan't tell him till we've got the -partnership, because his own business worries him a good deal and -we don't want to bother him with ours till it's settled, and then -we shall give him half our share.' - -The old gentleman took off his spectacles and rumpled his hair with -his hands, then he said, 'Then what did you come for?' - -'We saw your advertisement,' Dicky said, 'and we want a hundred -pounds on our note of hand, and my sister came so that there should -be both kinds of us; and we want it to buy a partnership with in -the lucrative business for sale of useful patent. No personal -attendance necessary.' - -'I don't think I quite follow you,' said the G. B. 'But one thing -I should like settled before entering more fully into the matter: -why did you call me Generous Benefactor?' - -'Well, you see,' said Alice, smiling at him to show she wasn't -frightened, though I know really she was, awfully, 'we thought it -was so very kind of you to try to find out the poor people who want -money and to help them and lend them your money.' - -'Hum!' said the G. B. 'Sit down.' - -He cleared the clocks and vases and candlesticks off some of the -chairs, and we sat down. The chairs were velvety, with gilt legs. -It was like a king's palace. - -'Now,' he said, 'you ought to be at school, instead of thinking -about money. Why aren't you?' - -We told him that we should go to school again when Father could -manage it, but meantime we wanted to do something to restore the -fallen fortunes of the House of Bastable. And we said we thought -the lucrative patent would be a very good thing. He asked a lot of -questions, and we told him everything we didn't think Father would -mind our telling, and at last he said - - -'You wish to borrow money. When will you repay it?' - -'As soon as we've got it, of course,' Dicky said. - -Then the G. B. said to Oswald, 'You seem the eldest,' but I -explained to him that it was Dicky's idea, so my being eldest -didn't matter. Then he said to Dicky - 'You are a minor, I -presume?' - -Dicky said he wasn't yet, but he had thought of being a mining -engineer some day, and going to Klondike. - -'Minor, not miner,' said the G. B. 'I mean you're not of age?' - -'I shall be in ten years, though,' said Dicky. -'Then you might repudiate the loan,' said the G. B., and Dicky said -'What?' - -Of course he ought to have said 'I beg your pardon. I didn't quite -catch what you said' - that is what Oswald would have said. It is -more polite than 'What.' - -'Repudiate the loan,' the G. B - repeated. 'I mean you might say -you would not pay me back the money, and the law could not compel -you to do so.' - -'Oh, well, if you think we're such sneaks,' said Dicky, and he got -up off his chair. But the G. B. said, 'Sit down, sit down; I was -only joking.' - -Then he talked some more, and at last he said - 'I don't advise you -to enter into that partnership. It's a swindle. Many -advertisements are. And I have not a hundred pounds by me to-day -to lend you. But I will lend you a pound, and you can spend it as -you like. And when you are twenty-one you shall pay me back.' - -'I shall pay you back long before that,' said Dicky. 'Thanks, -awfully! And what about the note of hand?' - -'Oh,' said the G. B., 'I'll trust to your honour. Between -gentlemen, you know - and ladies' - he made a beautiful bow to -Alice -'a word is as good as a bond.' - -Then he took out a sovereign, and held it in his hand while he -talked to us. He gave us a lot of good advice about not going into -business too young, and about doing our lessons - just swatting a -bit, on our own hook, so as not to be put in a low form when we -went back to school. And all the time he was stroking the -sovereign and looking at it as if he thought it very beautiful. -And so it was, for it was a new one. Then at last he held it out -to Dicky, and when Dicky put out his hand for it the G. B. suddenly -put the sovereign back in his pocket. - -'No,' he said, 'I won't give you the sovereign. I'll give you -fifteen shillings, and this nice bottle of scent. It's worth far -more than the five shillings I'm charging you for it. And, when -you can, you shall pay me back the pound, and sixty per cent -interest - sixty per cent, sixty per cent.' - -'What's that?' said H. O. - -The G. B. said he'd tell us that when we paid back the sovereign, -but sixty per cent was nothing to be afraid of. He gave Dicky the -money. And the boy was made to call a cab, and the G. B. put us in -and shook hands with us all, and asked Alice to give him a kiss, so -she did, and H. O. would do it too, though his face was dirtier -than ever. The G. B. paid the cabman and told him what station to -go to, and so we went home. - -That evening Father had a letter by the seven-o'clock post. And -when he had read it he came up into the nursery. He did not look -quite so unhappy as usual, but he looked grave. - -'You've been to Mr Rosenbaum's,' he said. - -So we told him all about it. It took a long time, and Father sat -in the armchair. It was jolly. He doesn't often come and talk to -us now. He has to spend all his time thinking about his business. -And when we'd told him all about it he said - - -'You haven't done any harm this time, children; rather good than -harm, indeed. Mr Rosenbaum has written me a very kind letter.' - -'Is he a friend of yours, Father?' Oswald asked. -'He is an acquaintance,' said my father, frowning a little, 'we -have done some business together. And this letter -' he stopped -and then said: 'No; you didn't do any harm to-day; but I want you -for the future not to do anything so serious as to try to buy a -partnership without consulting me, that's all. I don't want to -interfere with your plays and pleasures; but you will consult me -about business matters, won't you?' - -Of course we said we should be delighted, but then Alice, who was -sitting on his knee, said, 'We didn't like to bother you.' - -Father said, 'I haven't much time to be with you, for my business -takes most of my time. It is an anxious business - but I can't -bear to think of your being left all alone like this.' - -He looked so sad we all said we liked being alone. And then he -looked sadder than ever. - -Then Alice said, 'We don't mean that exactly, Father. It is rather -lonely sometimes, since Mother died.' Then we were all quiet a -little while. Father stayed with us till we went to bed, and when -he said good night he looked quite cheerful. So we told him so, -and he said - 'Well, the fact is, that letter took a weight off my -mind.' I can't think what he meant - but I am sure the G. B. would -be pleased if he could know he had taken a weight off somebody's -mind. He is that sort of man, I think. - -We gave the scent to Dora. It is not quite such good scent as we -thought it would be, but we had fifteen shillings - and they were -all good, so is the G. B. - -And until those fifteen shillings were spent we felt almost as -jolly as though our fortunes had been properly restored. You do -not notice your general fortune so much, as long as you have money -in your pocket. This is why so many children with regular -pocket-money have never felt it their duty to seek for treasure. -So, perhaps, our not having pocket-money was a blessing in -disguise. But the disguise was quite impenetrable, like the -villains' in the books; and it seemed still more so when the -fifteen shillings were all spent. Then at last the others agreed -to let Oswald try his way of seeking for treasure, but they were -not at all keen about it, and many a boy less firm than Oswald -would have chucked the whole thing. But Oswald knew that a hero -must rely on himself alone. So he stuck to it, and presently the -others saw their duty, and backed him up. - - - -CHAPTER 10 -LORD TOTTENHAM - - -Oswald is a boy of firm and unswerving character, and he had never -wavered from his first idea. He felt quite certain that the books -were right, and that the best way to restore fallen fortunes was to -rescue an old gentleman in distress. Then he brings you up as his -own son: but if you preferred to go on being your own father's son -I expect the old gentleman would make it up to you some other way. -In the books the least thing does it - you put up the railway -carriage window - or you pick up his purse when he drops it - or -you say a hymn when he suddenly asks you to, and then your fortune -is made. - -The others, as I said, were very slack about it, and did not seem -to care much about trying the rescue. They said there wasn't any -deadly peril, and we should have to make one before we could rescue -the old gentleman from it, but Oswald didn't see that that -mattered. However, he thought he would try some of the easier ways -first, by himself. - -So he waited about the station, pulling up railway carriage windows -for old gentlemen who looked likely - but nothing happened, and at -last the porters said he was a nuisance. So that was no go. No -one ever asked him to say a hymn, though he had learned a nice -short one, beginning 'New every morning' - and when an old -gentleman did drop a two-shilling piece just by Ellis's the -hairdresser's, and Oswald picked it up, and was just thinking what -he should say when he returned it, the old gentleman caught him by -the collar and called him a young thief. It would have been very -unpleasant for Oswald if he hadn't happened to be a very brave boy, -and knew the policeman on that beat very well indeed. So the -policeman backed him up, and the old gentleman said he was sorry, -and offered Oswald sixpence. Oswald refused it with polite -disdain, and nothing more happened at all. - -When Oswald had tried by himself and it had not come off, he said -to the others, 'We're wasting our time, not trying to rescue the -old gentleman in deadly peril. Come - buck up! Do let's do -something!' - -It was dinner-time, and Pincher was going round getting the bits -off the plates. There were plenty because it was cold-mutton day. -And Alice said - - -'It's only fair to try Oswald's way - he has tried all the things -the others thought of. Why couldn't we rescue Lord Tottenham?' - -Lord Tottenham is the old gentleman who walks over the Heath every -day in a paper collar at three o'clock - and when he gets halfway, -if there is no one about, he changes his collar and throws the -dirty one into the furze-bushes. - -Dicky said, 'Lord Tottenham's all right - but where's the deadly -peril?' - -And we couldn't think of any. There are no highwaymen on -Blackheath now, I am sorry to say. And though Oswald said half of -us could be highwaymen and the other half rescue party, Dora kept -on saying it would be wrong to be a highwayman - and so we had to -give that up. - -Then Alice said, 'What about Pincher?' - -And we all saw at once that it could be done. - -Pincher is very well bred, and he does know one or two things, -though we never could teach him to beg. But if you tell him to -hold on - he will do it, even if you only say 'Seize him!' in a -whisper. - -So we arranged it all. Dora said she wouldn't play; she said she -thought it was wrong, and she knew it was silly - so we left her -out, and she went and sat in the dining-room with a goody-book, so -as to be able to say she didn't have anything to do with it, if we -got into a row over it. - -Alice and H. O. were to hide in the furze-bushes just by where Lord -Tottenham changes his collar, and they were to whisper, 'Seize -him!' to Pincher; and then when Pincher had seized Lord Tottenham -we were to go and rescue him from his deadly peril. And he would -say, 'How can I reward you, my noble young preservers?' and it -would be all right. - -So we went up to the Heath. We were afraid of being late. Oswald -told the others what Procrastination was - so they got to the -furze-bushes a little after two o'clock, and it was rather cold. -Alice and H. O. and Pincher hid, but Pincher did not like it any -more than they did, and as we three walked up and down we heard him -whining. And Alice kept saying, 'I am so cold! Isn't he coming -yet?' And H. O. wanted to come out and jump about to warm himself. - -But we told him he must learn to be a Spartan boy, and that he -ought to be very thankful he hadn't got a beastly fox eating his -inside all the time. H. O. is our little brother, and we are not -going to let it be our fault if he grows up a milksop. Besides, it -was not really cold. It was his knees - he wears socks. So they -stayed where they were. And at last, when even the other three who -were walking about were beginning to feel rather chilly, we saw -Lord Tottenham's big black cloak coming along, flapping in the wind -like a great bird. So we said to Alice - - -'Hist! he approaches. You'll know when to set Pincher on by -hearing Lord Tottenham talking to himself - he always does while he -is taking off his collar.' - -Then we three walked slowly away whistling to show we were not -thinking of anything. Our lips were rather cold, but we managed to -do it. - -Lord Tottenham came striding along, talking to himself. People -call him the mad Protectionist. I don't know what it means - but -I don't think people ought to call a Lord such names. -As he passed us he said, 'Ruin of the country, sir! Fatal error, -fatal error!' And then we looked back and saw he was getting quite -near where Pincher was, and Alice and H. O. We walked on - so that -he shouldn't think we were looking - and in a minute we heard -Pincher's bark, and then nothing for a bit; and then we looked -round, and sure enough good old Pincher had got Lord Tottenham by -the trouser leg and was holding on like billy-ho, so we started to -run. - -Lord Tottenham had got his collar half off - it was sticking out -sideways under his ear - and he was shouting, 'Help, help, murder!' -exactly as if some one had explained to him beforehand what he was -to do. Pincher was growling and snarling and holding on. When we -got to him I stopped and said - - -'Dicky, we must rescue this good old man.' Lord Tottenham roared -in his fury, 'Good old man be -' something or othered. 'Call the -dog off.' - -So Oswald said. 'It is a dangerous task - but who would hesitate -to do an act of true bravery?' - -And all the while Pincher was worrying and snarling, and Lord -Tottenham shouting to us to get the dog away. He was dancing about -in the road with Pincher hanging on like grim death; and his collar -flapping about, where it was undone. - -Then Noel said, 'Haste, ere yet it be too late.' So I said to Lord -Tottenham - - -'Stand still, aged sir, and I will endeavour to alleviate your -distress.' - -He stood still, and I stooped down and caught hold of Pincher and -whispered, 'Drop it, sir; drop it!' - -So then Pincher dropped it, and Lord Tottenham fastened his collar -again - he never does change it if there's any one looking - and he -said - - -I'm much obliged, I'm sure. Nasty vicious brute! Here's something -to drink my health.' - -But Dicky explained that we are teetotallers, and do not drink -people's healths. So Lord Tottenham said, 'Well, I'm much obliged -any way. And now I come to look at you - of course, you're not -young ruffians, but gentlemen's sons, eh? Still, you won't be -above taking a tip from an old boy - I wasn't when I was your age,' -and he pulled out half a sovereign. - -It was very silly; but now we'd done it I felt it would be beastly -mean to take the old boy's chink after putting him in such a funk. -He didn't say anything about bringing us up as his own sons - so I -didn't know what to do. I let Pincher go, and was just going to -say he was very welcome, and we'd rather not have the money, which -seemed the best way out of it, when that beastly dog spoiled the -whole show. Directly I let him go he began to jump about at us and -bark for joy, and try to lick our faces. He was so proud of what -he'd done. Lord Tottenham opened his eyes and he just said, 'The -dog seems to know you.' - -And then Oswald saw it was all up, and he said, 'Good morning,' and -tried to get away. But Lord Tottenham said - - -'Not so fast!' And he caught Noel by the collar. Noel gave a -howl, and Alice ran out from the bushes. NoEl is her favourite. -I'm sure I don't know why. Lord Tottenham looked at her, and he -said - - -So there are more of you!' And then H. O. came out. - -'Do you complete the party?' Lord Tottenham asked him. And H. O. -said there were only five of us this time. - -Lord Tottenham turned sharp off and began to walk away, holding -Noel by the collar. We caught up with him, and asked him where he -was going, and he said, 'To the Police Station.' So then I said -quite politely, 'Well, don't take Noel; he's not strong, and he -easily gets upset. Besides, it wasn't his doing. If you want to -take any one take me - it was my very own idea.' - -Dicky behaved very well. He said, 'If you take Oswald I'll go too, -but don't take Noel; he's such a delicate little chap.' - -Lord Tottenham stopped, and he said, 'You should have thought of -that before.' NoEl was howling all the time, and his face was very -white, and Alice said - - -'Oh, do let Noel go, dear, good, kind Lord Tottenham; he'll faint -if you don't, I know he will, he does sometimes. Oh, I wish we'd -never done it! Dora said it was wrong.' - -'Dora displayed considerable common sense,' said Lord Tottenham, -and he let Noel go. And Alice put her arm round Noel and tried to -cheer him up, but he was all trembly, and as white as paper. Then -Lord Tottenham said - - -'Will you give me your word of honour not to try to escape?' - -So we said we would. - -'Then follow me,' he said, and led the way to a bench. We all -followed, and Pincher too, with his tail between his legs - he knew -something was wrong. Then Lord Tottenham sat down, and he made -Oswald and Dicky and H. O. stand in front of him, but he let Alice -and NoEl sit down. And he said - - -'You set your dog on me, and you tried to make me believe you were -saving me from it. And you would have taken my half-sovereign. -Such conduct is most - No - you shall tell me what it is, sir, and -speak the truth.' - -So I had to say it was most ungentlemanly, but I said I hadn't been -going to take the half-sovereign. - -'Then what did you do it for?' he asked. 'The truth, mind.' - -So I said, 'I see now it was very silly, and Dora said it was -wrong, but it didn't seem so till we did it. We wanted to restore -the fallen fortunes of our house, and in the books if you rescue an -old gentleman from deadly peril, he brings you up as his own son - -or if you prefer to be your father's son, he starts you in -business, so that you end in wealthy affluence; and there wasn't -any deadly peril, so we made Pincher into one - and so -' I was so -ashamed I couldn't go on, for it did seem an awfully mean thing. -Lord Tottenham said - - -'A very nice way to make your fortune - by deceit and trickery. I -have a horror of dogs. If I'd been a weak man the shock might have -killed me. What do you think of yourselves, eh?' - -We were all crying except Oswald, and the others say he was; and -Lord Tottenham went on - 'Well, well, I see you're sorry. Let this -be a lesson to you; and we'll say no more about it. I'm an old man -now, but I was young once.' - -Then Alice slid along the bench close to him, and put her hand on -his arm: her fingers were pink through the holes in her woolly -gloves, and said, 'I think you're very good to forgive us, and we -are really very, very sorry. But we wanted to be like the children -in the books - only we never have the chances they have. -Everything they do turns out all right. But we are sorry, very, -very. And I know Oswald wasn't going to take the half-sovereign. -Directly you said that about a tip from an old boy I began to feel -bad inside, and I whispered to H. O. that I wished we hadn't.' - -Then Lord Tottenham stood up, and he looked like the Death of -Nelson, for he is clean shaved and it is a good face, and he -said - - -'Always remember never to do a dishonourable thing, for money or -for anything else in the world.' - -And we promised we would remember. Then he took off his hat, and -we took off ours, and he went away, and we went home. I never felt -so cheap in all my life! Dora said, 'I told you so,' but we didn't -mind even that so much, though it was indeed hard to bear. It was -what Lord Tottenham had said about ungentlemanly. We didn't go on -to the Heath for a week after that; but at last we all went, and we -waited for him by the bench. When he came along Alice said, -'Please, Lord Tottenham, we have not been on the Heath for a week, -to be a punishment because you let us off. And we have brought you -a present each if you will take them to show you are willing to -make it up.' - -He sat down on the bench, and we gave him our presents. Oswald -gave him a sixpenny compass - he bought it with my own money on -purpose to give him. Oswald always buys useful presents. The -needle would not move after I'd had it a day or two, but Lord -Tottenham used to be an admiral, so he will be able to make that go -all right. Alice had made him a shaving-case, with a rose worked -on it. And H. O. gave him his knife - the same one he once cut all -the buttons off his best suit with. Dicky gave him his prize, -Naval Heroes, because it was the best thing he had, and Noel gave -him a piece of poetry he had made himself- - - -When sin and shame bow down the brow -Then people feel just like we do now. -We are so sorry with grief and pain -We never will be so ungentlemanly again. - - -Lord Tottenham seemed very pleased. He thanked us, and talked to -us for a bit, and when he said good-bye he said - - -'All's fair weather now, mates,' and shook hands. - -And whenever we meet him he nods to us, and if the girls are with -us he takes off his hat, so he can't really be going on thinking us -ungentlemanly now. - - - -CHAPTER 11 -CASTILIAN AMOROSO - - - -One day when we suddenly found that we had half a crown we decided -that we really ought to try Dicky's way of restoring our fallen -fortunes while yet the deed was in our power. Because it might -easily have happened to us never to have half a crown again. So we -decided to dally no longer with being journalists and bandits and -things like them, but to send for sample and instructions how to -earn two pounds a week each in our spare time. We had seen the -advertisement in the paper, and we had always wanted to do it, but -we had never had the money to spare before, somehow. The -advertisement says: 'Any lady or gentleman can easily earn two -pounds a week in their spare time. Sample and instructions, two -shillings. Packed free from observation.' A good deal of the -half-crown was Dora's. It came from her godmother; but she said -she would not mind letting Dicky have it if he would pay her back -before Christmas, and if we were sure it was right to try to make -our fortune that way. Of course that was quite easy, because out -of two pounds a week in your spare time you can easily pay all your -debts, and have almost as much left as you began with; and as to -the right we told her to dry up. - -Dicky had always thought that this was really the best way to -restore our fallen fortunes, and we were glad that now he had a -chance of trying because of course we wanted the two pounds a week -each, and besides, we were rather tired of Dicky's always saying, -when our ways didn't turn out well, 'Why don't you try the sample -and instructions about our spare time?' - -When we found out about our half-crown we got the paper. NoEl was -playing admirals in it, but he had made the cocked hat without -tearing the paper, and we found the advertisement, and it said just -the same as ever. So we got a two-shilling postal order and a -stamp, and what was left of the money it was agreed we would spend -in ginger-beer to drink success to trade. - -We got some nice paper out of Father's study, and Dicky wrote the -letter, and we put in the money and put on the stamp, and made H. -O. post it. Then we drank the ginger-beer, and then we waited for -the sample and instructions. It seemed a long time coming, and the -postman got quite tired of us running out and stopping him in the -street to ask if it had come. - -But on the third morning it came. It was quite a large parcel, and -it was packed, as the advertisement said it would be, 'free from -observation.' That means it was in a box; and inside the box was -some stiff browny cardboard, crinkled like the galvanized iron on -the tops of chicken-houses, and inside that was a lot of paper, -some of it printed and some scrappy, and in the very middle of it -all a bottle, not very large, and black, and sealed on the top of -the cork with yellow sealing-wax. - -We looked at it as it lay on the nursery table, and while all the -others grabbed at the papers to see what the printing said, Oswald -went to look for the corkscrew, so as to see what was inside the -bottle. He found the corkscrew in the dresser drawer - it always -gets there, though it is supposed to be in the sideboard drawer in -the dining-room - and when he got back the others had read most of -the printed papers. - -'I don't think it's much good, and I don't think it's quite nice to -sell wine,' Dora said 'and besides, it's not easy to suddenly begin -to sell things when you aren't used to it.' - -'I don't know,' said Alice; 'I believe I could.' They all looked -rather down in the mouth, though, and Oswald asked how you were to -make your two pounds a week. - -'Why, you've got to get people to taste that stuff in the bottle. -It's sherry - Castilian Amoroso its name is - and then you get them -to buy it, and then you write to the people and tell them the other -people want the wine, and then for every dozen you sell you get two -shillings from the wine people, so if you sell twenty dozen a week -you get your two pounds. I don't think we shall sell as much as -that,' said Dicky. - -'We might not the first week,' Alice said, 'but when people found -out how nice it was, they would want more and more. And if we only -got ten shillings a week it would be something to begin with, -wouldn't it?' - -Oswald said he should jolly well think it would, and then Dicky -took the cork out with the corkscrew. The cork broke a good deal, -and some of the bits went into the bottle. Dora got the medicine -glass that has the teaspoons and tablespoons marked on it, and we -agreed to have a teaspoonful each, to see what it was like. - -'No one must have more than that,' Dora said, 'however nice it is.' - -Dora behaved rather as if it were her bottle. I suppose it was, -because she had lent the money for it. - -Then she measured Out the teaspoonful, and she had first go, -because of being the eldest. We asked at once what it was like, -but Dora could not speak just then. - -Then she said, 'It's like the tonic Noel had in the spring; but -perhaps sherry ought to be like that.' - -Then it was Oswald's turn. He thought it was very burny; but he -said nothing. He wanted to see first what the others would say. - -Dicky said his was simply beastly, and Alice said Noel could taste -next if he liked. - -Noel said it was the golden wine of the gods, but he had to put his -handkerchief up to his mouth all the same, and I saw the face he -made. - -Then H. O. had his, and he spat it out in the fire, which was very -rude and nasty, and we told him so. - -Then it was Alice's turn. She said, 'Only half a tea-spoonful for -me, Dora. We mustn't use it all up.' And she tasted it and said -nothing. - -Then Dicky said: 'Look here, I chuck this. I'm not going to hawk -round such beastly stuff. Any one who likes can have the bottle. -Quis?' - -And Alice got out 'Ego' before the rest of us. Then she said, 'I -know what's the matter with it. It wants sugar.' - -And at once we all saw that that was all there was the matter with -the stuff. So we got two lumps of sugar and crushed it on the -floor with one of the big wooden bricks till it was powdery, and -mixed it with some of the wine up to the tablespoon mark, and it -was quite different, and not nearly so nasty. - -'You see it's all right when you get used to it,' Dicky said. I -think he was sorry he had said 'Quis?' in such a hurry. - -'Of course,' Alice said, 'it's rather dusty. We must crush the -sugar carefully in clean paper before we put it in the bottle.' - -Dora said she was afraid it would be cheating to make one bottle -nicer than what people would get when they ordered a dozen bottles, -but Alice said Dora always made a fuss about everything, and really -it would be quite honest. - -'You see,' she said, 'I shall just tell them, quite truthfully, -what we have done to it, and when their dozens come they can do it -for themselves.' - -So then we crushed eight more lumps, very cleanly and carefully -between newspapers, and shook it up well in the bottle, and corked -it up with a screw of paper, brown and not news, for fear of the -poisonous printing ink getting wet and dripping down into the wine -and killing people. We made Pincher have a taste, and he sneezed -for ever so long, and after that he used to go under the sofa -whenever we showed him the bottle. - -Then we asked Alice who she would try and sell it to. She said: 'I -shall ask everybody who comes to the house. And while we are doing -that, we can be thinking of outside people to take it to. We must -be careful: there's not much more than half of it left, even -counting the sugar.' - -We did not wish to tell Eliza - I don't know why. And she opened -the door very quickly that day, so that the Taxes and a man who -came to our house by mistake for next door got away before Alice -had a chance to try them with the Castilian Amoroso. But about -five Eliza slipped out for half an hour to see a friend who was -making her a hat for Sunday, and while she was gone there was a -knock. Alice went, and we looked over the banisters. When she -opened the door, she said at once, 'Will you walk in, please?' -The person at the door said, 'I called to see your Pa, miss. Is he -at home?' - -Alice said again, 'Will you walk in, please?' - -Then the person - it sounded like a man - said, 'He is in, then?' - -But Alice only kept on saying, 'Will you walk in, please?' so at -last the man did, rubbing his boots very loudly on the mat. - -Then Alice shut the front door, and we saw that it was the butcher, -with an envelope in his hand. He was not dressed in blue, like -when he is cutting up the sheep and things in the shop, and he wore -knickerbockers. Alice says he came on a bicycle. She led the way -into the dining-room, where the Castilian Amoroso bottle and the -medicine glass were standIng on the table all ready. - -The others stayed on the stairs, but Oswald crept down and looked -through the door-crack. - -'Please sit down,' said Alice quite calmly, though she told me -afterwards I had no idea how silly she felt. And the butcher sat -down. Then Alice stood quite still and said nothing, but she -fiddled with the medicine glass and put the screw of brown paper -straight in the Castilian bottle. - -'Will you tell your Pa I'd like a word with him?' the butcher said, -when he got tired of saying nothing. - -'He'll be in very soon, I think,' Alice said. - -And then she stood still again and said nothing. It was beginning -to look very idiotic of her, and H. O. laughed. I went back and -cuffed him for it quite quietly, and I don't think the butcher -heard. - -But Alice did, and it roused her from her stupor. She spoke -suddenly, very fast indeed - so fast that I knew she had made up -what she was going to say before. She had got most of it out of -the circular. - -She said, 'I want to call your attention to a sample of sherry wine -I have here. It is called Castilian something or other, and at the -price it is unequalled for flavour and bouquet.' - -The butcher said, 'Well - I never!' - -And Alice went on, 'Would you like to taste it?' - -'Thank you very much, I'm sure, miss,' said the butcher. - -Alice poured some out. - -The butcher tasted a very little. He licked his lips, and we -thought he was going to say how good it was. But he did not. He -put down the medicine glass with nearly all the stuff left in it -(we put it back in the bottle afterwards to save waste) and said, -'Excuse me, miss, but isn't it a little sweet? - for sherry I -mean?' - -'The real isn't,' said Alice. 'If you order a dozen it will come -quite different to that - we like it best with sugar. I wish you -would order some.' The butcher asked why. - -Alice did not speak for a minute, and then she said - - -'I don't mind telling you: you are in business yourself, aren't -you? We are trying to get people to buy it, because we shall have -two shillings for every dozen we can make any one buy. It's called -a purr something.' - -'A percentage. Yes, I see,' said the butcher, looking at the hole -in the carpet. - -'You see there are reasons, Alice went on, 'why we want to make our -fortunes as quickly as we can.' - -'Quite so,' said the butcher, and he looked at the place where the -paper is coming off the wall. - -'And this seems a good way,' Alice went on. 'We paid two shillings -for the sample and instructions, and it says you can make two -pounds a week easily in your leisure time.' - -'I'm sure I hope you may, miss,' said the butcher. And Alice said -again would he buy some? - -'Sherry is my favourite wine,' he said. Alice asked him to have -some more to drink. - -'No, thank you, miss,' he said; 'it's my favourite wine, but it -doesn't agree with me; not the least bit. But I've an uncle drinks -it. Suppose I ordered him half a dozen for a Christmas present? -Well, miss, here's the shilling commission, anyway,' and he pulled -out a handful of money and gave her the shilling. - -'But I thought the wine people paid that,' Alice said. - -But the butcher said not on half-dozens they didn't. Then he said -he didn't think he'd wait any longer for Father - but would Alice -ask Father to write him? - -Alice offered him the sherry again, but he said something about -'Not for worlds!' - and then she let him out and came back to us -with the shilling, and said, 'How's that?' - -And we said 'Ai.' - -And all the evening we talked of our fortune that we had begun to -make. - -Nobody came next day, but the day after a lady came to ask for -money to build an orphanage for the children of dead sailors. And -we saw her. I went in with Alice. And when we had explained to -her that we had only a shilling and we wanted it for something -else, Alice suddenly said, 'Would you like some wine?' - -And the lady said, 'Thank you very much,' but she looked surprised. - -She was not a young lady, and she had a mantle with beads, and the -beads had come off in places - leaving a browny braid showing, and -she had printed papers about the dead sailors in a sealskin bag, -and the seal had come off in places, leaving the skin bare. -We gave her a tablespoonful of the wine in a proper wine-glass out -of the sideboard, because she was a lady. And when she had tasted -it she got up in a very great hurry, and shook out her dress and -snapped her bag shut, and said, 'You naughty, wicked children! -What do you mean by playing a trick like this? You ought to be -ashamed of yourselves! I shall write to your Mamma about it. You -dreadful little girl! - you might have poisoned me. But your -Mamma...' - -Then Alice said, 'I'm very sorry; the butcher liked it, only he -said it was sweet. And please don't write to Mother. It makes -Father so unhappy when letters come for her!' - and Alice was very -near crying. - -'What do you mean, you silly child?' said the lady, looking quite -bright and interested. 'Why doesn't your Father like your Mother -to have letters - eh?' - -And Alice said, 'Oh, you ... !'and began to cry, and bolted out of -the room. - -Then I said, 'Our Mother is dead, and will you please go away now?' - -The lady looked at me a minute, and then she looked quite -different, and she said, 'I'm very sorry. I didn't know. Never -mind about the wine. I daresay your little sister meant it -kindly.' And she looked round the room just like the butcher had -done. Then she said again, 'I didn't know - I'm very sorry. . .' - -So I said, 'Don't mention it,' and shook hands with her, and let -her out. Of course we couldn't have asked her to buy the wine -after what she'd said. But I think she was not a bad sort of -person. I do like a person to say they're sorry when they ought to -be - especially a grown-up. They do it so seldom. I suppose -that's why we think so much of it. - -But Alice and I didn't feel jolly for ever so long afterwards. And -when I went back into the dining-room I saw how different it was -from when Mother was here, and we are different, and Father is -different, and nothing is like it was. I am glad I am not made to -think about it every day. - -I went and found Alice, and told her what the lady had said, and -when she had finished crying we put away the bottle and said we -would not try to sell any more to people who came. And we did not -tell the others - we only said the lady did not buy any - but we -went up on the Heath, and some soldiers went by and there was a -Punch-and-judy show, and when we came back we were better. - -The bottle got quite dusty where we had put it, and perhaps the -dust of ages would have laid thick and heavy on it, only a -clergyman called when we were all out. He was not our own -clergyman - Mr Bristow is our own clergyman, and we all love him, -and we would not try to sell sherry to people we like, and make two -pounds a week out of them in our spare time. It was another -clergyman, just a stray one; and he asked Eliza if the dear -children would not like to come to his little Sunday school. We -always spend Sunday afternoons with Father. But as he had left the -name of his vicarage with Eliza, and asked her to tell us to come, -we thought we would go and call on him, just to explain about -Sunday afternoons, and we thought we might as well take the sherry -with us. - -'I won't go unless you all go too,' Alice said, 'and I won't do the -talking.' - -Dora said she thought we had much better not go; but we said 'Rot!' -and it ended in her coming with us, and I am glad she did. - -Oswald said he would do the talking if the others liked, and he -learned up what to say from the printed papers. - -We went to the Vicarage early on Saturday afternoon, and rang at -the bell. It is a new red house with no trees in the garden, only -very yellow mould and gravel. It was all very neat and dry. Just -before we rang the bell we heard some one inside call 'Jane! Jane!' -and we thought we would not be Jane for anything. It was the sound -of the voice that called that made us sorry for her. - -The door was opened by a very neat servant in black, with a white -apron; we saw her tying the strings as she came along the hall, -through the different-coloured glass in the door. Her face was -red, and I think she was Jane. We asked if we could see Mr Mallow. - -The servant said Mr Mallow was very busy with his sermon just then, -but she would see. - -But Oswald said, 'It's all right. He asked us to come.' - -So she let us all in and shut the front door, and showed us into a -very tidy room with a bookcase full of a lot of books covered in -black cotton with white labels, and some dull pictures, and a -harmonium. And Mr Mallow was writing at a desk with drawers, -copying something out of a book. He was stout and short, and wore -spectacles. - -He covered his writing up when we went in - I didn't know why. He -looked rather cross, and we heard Jane or somebody being scolded -outside by the voice. I hope it wasn't for letting us in, but I -have had doubts. - -'Well,' said the clergyman, 'what is all this about?' - -'You asked us to call,' Dora said, 'about your little Sunday -school. We are the Bastables of Lewisham Road.' - -'Oh - ah, yes,' he said; 'and shall I expect you all to-morrow?' - -He took up his pen and fiddled with it, and he did not ask us to -sit down. But some of us did. - -'We always spend Sunday afternoon with Father,' said Dora; 'but we -wished to thank you for being so kind as to ask us.' - -'And we wished to ask you something else!' said Oswald; and he made -a sign to Alice to get the sherry ready in the glass. She did - -behind Oswald's back while he was speaking. - -'My time is limited,' said Mr Mallow, looking at his watch; 'but -still -' Then he muttered something about the fold, and went on: -'Tell me what is troubling you, my little man, and I will try to -give you any help in my power. What is it you want?' - -Then Oswald quickly took the glass from Alice, and held it out to -him, and said, 'I want your opinion on that.' - -'On that,' he said. 'What is it?' - -'It is a shipment,' Oswald said; 'but it's quite enough for you to -taste.' Alice had filled the glass half-full; I suppose she was -too excited to measure properly. - -'A shipment?' said the clergyman, taking the glass in his hand. - -'Yes,' Oswald went On; 'an exceptional opportunity. Full-bodied -and nutty.' - -'It really does taste rather like one kind of Brazil-nut.' Alice -put her oar in as usual. - -The Vicar looked from Alice to Oswald, and back again, and Oswald -went on with what he had learned from the printing. The clergyman -held the glass at half-arm's-length, stiffly, as if he had caught -cold. - -'It is of a quality never before offered at the price. Old -Delicate Amoro - what's its name -' -'Amorolio,' said H. O. - -'Amoroso,' said Oswald. 'H. O., you just shut up - Castilian -Amoroso - it's a true after-dinner wine, stimulating and yet ...' - -'Wine?'said Mr Mallow, holding the glass further off. 'Do you -know,' he went on, making his voice very thick and strong (I expect -he does it like that in church), 'have you never been taught that -it is the drinking of wine and spirits - yes, and BEER, which makes -half the homes in England full of wretched little children, and -degraded, MISERABLE parents?' - -'Not if you put sugar in it,' said Alice firmly; 'eight lumps and -shake the bottle. We have each had more than a teaspoonful of it, -and we were not ill at all. It was something else that upset H. O. -Most likely all those acorns he got out of the Park.' - -The clergyman seemed to be speechless with conflicting emotions, -and just then the door opened and a lady came in. She had a white -cap with lace, and an ugly violet flower in it, and she was tall, -and looked very strong, though thin. And I do believe she had been -listening at the door. - -'But why,' the Vicar was saying, 'why did you bring this dreadful -fluid, this curse of our country, to me to taste?' - -'Because we thought you might buy some,' said Dora, who never sees -when a game is up. 'In books the parson loves his bottle of old -port; and new sherry is just as good - with sugar - for people who -like sherry. And if you would order a dozen of the wine, then we -should get two shillings.' - -The lady said (and it was the voice), 'Good gracious! Nasty, -sordid little things! Haven't they any one to teach them better?' - -And Dora got up and said, 'No, we are not those things you say; but -we are sorry we came here to be called names. We want to make our -fortune just as much as Mr Mallow does - only no one would listen -to us if we preached, so it's no use our copying out sermons like -him.' - -And I think that was smart of Dora, even if it was rather rude. - -Then I said perhaps we had better go, and the lady said, 'I should -think so!' - -But when we were going to wrap up the bottle and glass the -clergyman said, 'No; you can leave that,' and we were so -upset we did, though it wasn't his after all. - -We walked home very fast and not saying much, and the girls went up -to their rooms. When I went to tell them tea was ready, and there -was a teacake, Dora was crying like anything and Alice hugging her. - -I am afraid there is a great deal of crying in this chapter, but I -can't help it. Girls will sometimes; I suppose it is their nature, -and we ought to be sorry for their affliction. - -'It's no good,' Dora was saying, 'you all hate me, and you think -I'm a prig and a busybody, but I do try to do right - oh, I do! -Oswald, go away; don't come here making fun of me!' - -So I said, 'I'm not making fun, Sissy; don't cry, old girl.' - -Mother taught me to call her Sissy when we were very little and -before the others came, but I don't often somehow, now we are old. -I patted her on the back, and she put her head against my sleeve, -holding on to Alice all the time, and she went on. She was in that -laughy-cryey state when people say things they wouldn't say at -other times. - -'Oh dear, oh dear - I do try, I do. And when Mother died she said, -"Dora, take care of the others, and teach them to be good, and keep -them out of trouble and make them happy." She said, "Take care of -them for me, Dora dear." And I have tried, and all of you hate me -for it; and to-day I let you do this, though I knew all the time it -was silly.' - -I hope you will not think I was a muff but I kissed Dora for some -time. Because girls like it. And I will never say again that she -comes the good elder sister too much. And I have put all this in -though I do hate telling about it, because I own I have been hard -on Dora, but I never will be again. She is a good old sort; of -course we never knew before about what Mother told her, or we -wouldn't have ragged her as we did. We did not tell the little -ones, but I got Alice to speak to Dicky, and we three can sit on -the others if requisite. - -This made us forget all about the sherry; but about eight o'clock -there was a knock, and Eliza went, and we saw it was poor Jane, if -her name was Jane, from the Vicarage. She handed in a brown-paper -parcel and a letter. And three minutes later Father called us into -his study. - -On the table was the brown-paper parcel, open, with our bottle and -glass on it, and Father had a letter in his hand. He Pointed to -the bottle and sighed, and said, 'What have you been doing now?' -The letter in his hand was covered with little black writing, all -over the four large pages. - -So Dicky spoke up, and he told Father the whole thing, as far as he -knew it, for Alice and I had not told about the dead sailors' lady. - -And when he had done, Alice said, 'Has Mr Mallow written to you to -say he will buy a dozen of the sherry after all? It is really not -half bad with sugar in it.' - -Father said no, he didn't think clergymen could afford such -expensive wine; and he said he would like to taste it. So we gave -him what there was left, for we had decided coming home that we -would give up trying for the two pounds a week in our spare time. - -Father tasted it, and then he acted just as H. O. had done when he -had his teaspoonful, but of course we did not say anything. Then -he laughed till I thought he would never stop. - -I think it was the sherry, because I am sure I have read somewhere -about 'wine that maketh glad the heart of man'. He had only a very -little, which shows that it was a good after-dinner wine, -stimulating, and yet ... I forget the rest. - -But when he had done laughing he said, 'It's all right, kids. Only -don't do it again. The wine trade is overcrowded; and besides, I -thought you promised to consult me before going into business?' - -'Before buying one I thought you meant,' said Dicky. 'This was -only on commission.' And Father laughed again. I am glad we got -the Castilian Amoroso, because it did really cheer Father up, and -you cannot always do that, however hard you try, even if you make -jokes, or give him a comic paper. - - - -CHAPTER 12 -THE NOBLENESS OF OSWALD - - -The part about his nobleness only comes at the end, but you would -not understand it unless you knew how it began. It began, like -nearly everything about that time, with treasure-seeking. - -Of course as soon as we had promised to consult my Father about -business matters we all gave up wanting to go into business. I -don't know how it is, but having to consult about a thing with -grown-up people, even the bravest and the best, seems to make the -thing not worth doing afterwards. - -We don't mind Albert's uncle chipping in sometimes when the thing's -going on, but we are glad he never asked us to promise to consult -him about anything. Yet Oswald saw that my Father was quite right; -and I daresay if we had had that hundred pounds we should have -spent it on the share in that lucrative business for the sale of -useful patent, and then found out afterwards that we should have -done better to spend the money in some other way. My Father says -so, and he ought to know. We had several ideas about that time, -but having so little chink always stood in the way. - -This was the case with H. O.'s idea of setting up a coconut-shy on -this side of the Heath, where there are none generally. We had no -sticks or wooden balls, and the greengrocer said he could not book -so many as twelve dozen coconuts without Mr Bastable's written -order. And as we did not wish to consult my Father it was decided -to drop it. And when Alice dressed up Pincher in some of the -dolls' clothes and we made up our minds to take him round with an -organ as soon as we had taught him to dance, we were stopped at -once by Dicky's remembering how he had once heard that an organ -cost seven hundred pounds. Of course this was the big church kind, -but even the ones on three legs can't be got for -one-and-sevenpence, which was all we had when we first thought of -it. So we gave that up too. - -It was a wet day, I remember, and mutton hash for dinner - very -tough with pale gravy with lumps in it. I think the others would -have left a good deal on the sides of their plates, although they -know better, only Oswald said it was a savoury stew made of the red -deer that Edward shot. So then we were the Children of the New -Forest, and the mutton tasted much better. No one in the New -Forest minds venison being tough and the gravy pale. - -Then after dinner we let the girls have a dolls' tea-party, on -condition they didn't expect us boys to wash up; and it was when we -were drinking the last of the liquorice water out of the little -cups that Dicky said - - -'This reminds me.' - -So we said, 'What of?' - -Dicky answered us at once, though his mouth was full of bread with -liquorice stuck in it to look like cake. You should not speak with -your mouth full, even to your own relations, and you shouldn't wipe -your mouth on the back of your hand, but on your handkerchief, if -you have one. Dicky did not do this. He said - - -'Why, you remember when we first began about treasure-seeking, I -said I had thought of something, only I could not tell you because -I hadn't finished thinking about it.' - -We said 'Yes.' - -'Well, this liquorice water -' - -'Tea,' said Alice softly. - -'Well, tea then - made me think.' He was going on to say what it -made him think, but Noel interrupted and cried out, 'I say; let's -finish off this old tea-party and have a council of war.' - -So we got out the flags and the wooden sword and the drum, and -Oswald beat it while the girls washed up, till Eliza came up to say -she had the jumping toothache, and the noise went through her like -a knife. So of course Oswald left off at once. When you are -polite to Oswald he never refuses to grant your requests. - -When we were all dressed up we sat down round the camp fire, and -Dicky began again. - -'Every one in the world wants money. Some people get it. The -people who get it are the ones who see things. I have seen one -thing.' - -Dicky stopped and smoked the pipe of peace. It is the pipe we did -bubbles with in the summer, and somehow it has not got broken yet. -We put tea-leaves in it for the pipe of peace, but the girls are -not allowed to have any. It is not right to let girls smoke. They -get to think too much of themselves if you let them do everything -the same as men. Oswald said, 'Out with it.' - -'I see that glass bottles only cost a penny. H. O., if you dare to -snigger I'll send you round selling old bottles, and you shan't -have any sweets except out of the money you get for them. And the -same with you, Noel.' - -'NoEl wasn't sniggering,' said Alice in a hurry; 'it is only his -taking so much interest in what you were saying makes him look like -that. Be quiet, H. O., and don't you make faces, either. Do go -on, Dicky dear.' - -So Dicky went on. - -'There must be hundreds of millions of bottles of medicines sold -every year. Because all the different medicines say, "Thousands of -cures daily," and if you only take that as two thousand, which it -must be, at least, it mounts up. And the people who sell them must -make a great deal of money by them because they are nearly always -two-and- ninepence the bottle, and three-and-six for one nearly -double the size. Now the bottles, as I was saying, don't cost -anything like that.' - -'It's the medicine costs the money,' said Dora; 'look how expensive -jujubes are at the chemist's, and peppermints too.' - -'That's only because they're nice,' Dicky explained; 'nasty things -are not so dear. Look what a lot of brimstone you get for a penny, -and the same with alum. We would not put the nice kinds of -chemist's things in our medicine.' - -Then he went on to tell us that when we had invented our medicine -we would write and tell the editor about it, and he would put it in -the paper, and then people would send their two-and-ninepence and -three-and-six for the bottle nearly double the size, and then when -the medicine had cured them they would write to the paper and their -letters would be printed, saying how they had been suffering for -years, and never thought to get about again, but thanks to the -blessing of our ointment -' - -Dora interrupted and said, 'Not ointment - it's so messy.' And -Alice thought so too. And Dicky said he did not mean it, he was -quite decided to let it be in bottles. So now it was all settled, -and we did not see at the time that this would be a sort of going -into business, but afterwards when Albert's uncle showed us we saw -it, and we were sorry. We only had to invent the medicine. You -might think that was easy, because of the number of them you see -every day in the paper, but it is much harder than you think. -First we had to decide what sort of illness we should like to cure, -and a 'heated discussion ensued', like in Parliament. - -Dora wanted it to be something to make the complexion of dazzling -fairness, but we remembered how her face came all red and rough -when she used the Rosabella soap that was advertised to make the -darkest complexion fair as the lily, and she agreed that perhaps it -was better not. Noel wanted to make the medicine first and then -find out what it would cure, but Dicky thought not, because there -are so many more medicines than there are things the matter with -us, so it would be easier to choose the disease first. -Oswald would have liked wounds. I still think it was a good idea, -but Dicky said, 'Who has wounds, especially now there aren't any -wars? We shouldn't sell a bottle a day!' So Oswald gave in -because he knows what manners are, and it was Dicky's idea. H. O. -wanted a cure for the uncomfortable feeling that they give you -powders for, but we explained to him that grown-up people do not -have this feeling, however much they eat, and he agreed. Dicky -said he did not care a straw what the loathsome disease was, as -long as we hurried up and settled on something. Then Alice said - - -'It ought to be something very common, and only one thing. Not the -pains in the back and all the hundreds of things the people have in -somebody's syrup. What's the commonest thing of all?' - -And at once we said, 'Colds.' - -So that was settled. - -Then we wrote a label to go on the bottle. When it was written it -would not go on the vinegar bottle that we had got, but we knew it -would go small when it was printed. It was like this: - - -BASTABLE'S - -CERTAIN CURE FOR COLDS Coughs, Asthma, Shortness of Breath, and all -infections of the Chest - -One dose gives immediate relief -It will cure your cold in one bottle -Especially the larger size at 3s. 6d. - -Order at once of the Makers -To prevent disappointment - -Makers: - -D., O., R., A., N., and H. O. BASTABLE - -150 Lewisham Road, S. E. - -(A halfpenny for all bottles returned) - - -Of course the next thing was for one of us to catch a cold and try -what cured it; we all wanted to be the one, but it was Dicky's -idea, and he said he was not going to be done out of it, so we let -him. It was only fair. He left off his undershirt that very day, -and next morning he stood in a draught in his nightgown for quite -a long time. And we damped his day-shirt with the nail-brush -before he put it on. But all was vain. They always tell you that -these things will give you cold, but we found it was not so. - -So then we all went over to the Park, and Dicky went right into the -water with his boots on, and stood there as long as he could bear -it, for it was rather cold, and we stood and cheered him on. He -walked home in his wet clothes, which they say is a sure thing, but -it was no go, though his boots were quite spoiled. And three days -after Noel began to cough and sneeze. - -So then Dicky said it was not fair. - -'I can't help it,' Noel said. 'You should have caught it yourself, -then it wouldn't have come to me. - -And Alice said she had known all along Noel oughtn't to have stood -about on the bank cheering in the cold. - -Noel had to go to bed, and then we began to make the medicines; we -were sorry he was out of it, but he had the fun of taking the -things. - -We made a great many medicines. Alice made herb tea. She got sage -and thyme and savory and marjoram and boiled them all up together -with salt and water, but she WOULD put parsley in too. Oswald is -sure parsley is not a herb. It is only put on the cold meat and -you are not supposed to eat it. It kills parrots to eat parsley, -I believe. I expect it was the parsley that disagreed so with -Noel. The medicine did not seem to do the cough any good. - -Oswald got a pennyworth of alum, because it is so cheap, and some -turpentine which every one knows is good for colds, and a little -sugar and an aniseed ball. These were mixed in a bottle with -water, but Eliza threw it away and said it was nasty rubbish, and -I hadn't any money to get more things with. - -Dora made him some gruel, and he said it did his chest good; but of -course that was no use, because you cannot put gruel in bottles and -say it is medicine. It would not be honest, and besides nobody -would believe you. - -Dick mixed up lemon-juice and sugar and a little of the juice of -the red flannel that Noel's throat was done up in. It comes out -beautifully in hot water. NoEl took this and he liked it. NoEl's -own idea was liquorice-water, and we let him have it, but it is too -plain and black to sell in bottles at the proper price. - -NoEl liked H. O.'s medicine the best, which was silly of him, -because it was only peppermints melted in hot water, and a little -cobalt to make it look blue. It was all right, because H. O.'s -paint-box is the French kind, with Couleurs non Vgngneuses on it. -This means you may suck your brushes if you want to, or even your -paints if you are a very little boy. - -It was rather jolly while Noel had that cold. He had a fire in his -bedroom which opens out of Dicky's and Oswald's, and the girls used -to read aloud to Noel all day; they will not read aloud to you when -you are well. Father was away at Liverpool on business, and -Albert's uncle was at Hastings. We were rather glad of this, -because we wished to give all the medicines a fair trial, and -grown-ups are but too fond of interfering. As if we should have -given him anything poisonous! - -His cold went on - it was bad in his head, but it was not one of -the kind when he has to have poultices and can't sit up in bed. -But when it had been in his head nearly a week, Oswald happened to -tumble over Alice on the stairs. When we got up she was crying. - -'Don't cry silly!' said Oswald; 'you know I didn't hurt you.' I -was very sorry if I had hurt her, but you ought not to sit on the -stairs in the dark and let other people tumble over you. You ought -to remember how beastly it is for them if they do hurt you. - -'Oh, it's not that, Oswald,' Alice said. 'Don't be a pig! I am so -miserable. Do be kind to me.' - -So Oswald thumped her on the back and told her to shut up. - -'It's about Noel,' she said. 'I'm sure he's very ill; and playing -about with medicines is all very well, but I know he's ill, and -Eliza won't send for the doctor: she says it's only a cold. And I -know the doctor's bills are awful. I heard Father telling Aunt -Emily so in the summer. But he was , and perhaps he'll die or -something.' - -Then she began to cry again. Oswald thumped her again, because he -knows how a good brother ought to behave, and said, 'Cheer up.' If -we had been in a book Oswald would have embraced his little sister -tenderly, and mingled his tears with hers. - -Then Oswald said, 'Why not write to Father?' - -And she cried more and said, 'I've lost the paper with the address. - -H. O. had it to draw on the back of, and I can't find it now; I've -looked everywhere. I'll tell you what I'm going to do. No I -won't. But I'm going out. Don't tell the others. And I say, -Oswald, do pretend I'm in if Eliza asks. Promise.' -'Tell me what you're going to do,' I said. But she said 'No'; and -there was a good reason why not. So I said I wouldn't promise if -it came to that. Of course I meant to all right. But it did seem -mean of her not to tell me. - -So Alice went out by the side door while Eliza was setting tea, and -she was a long time gone; she was not in to tea. When Eliza asked -Oswald where she was he said he did not know, but perhaps she was -tidying her corner drawer. Girls often do this, and it takes a -long time. NoEl coughed a good bit after tea, and asked for Alice. - -Oswald told him she was doing something and it was a secret. -Oswald did not tell any lies even to save his sister. When Alice -came back she was very quiet, but she whispered to Oswald that it -was all right. When it was rather late Eliza said she was going -out to post a letter. This always takes her an hour, because she -WILL go to the post-office across the Heath instead of the -pillar-box, because once a boy dropped fusees in our pillar-box and -burnt the letters. It was not any of us; Eliza told us about it. -And when there was a knock at the door a long time after we thought -it was Eliza come back, and that she had forgotten the back-door -key. We made H. O. go down to open the door, because it is his -place to run about: his legs are younger than ours. And we heard -boots on the stairs besides H. O.'s, and we listened spellbound -till the door opened, and it was Albert's uncle. He looked very -tired. - -'I am glad you've come,' Oswald said. 'Alice began to think Noel --' - -Alice stopped me, and her face was very red, her nose was shiny -too, with having cried so much before tea. - -She said, 'I only said I thought Noel ought to have the doctor. -Don't you think he ought?' She got hold of Albert's uncle and held -on to him. - -'Let's have a look at you, young man,' said Albert's uncle, and he -sat down on the edge of the bed. It is a rather shaky bed, the bar -that keeps it steady underneath got broken when we were playing -burglars last winter. It was our crowbar. He began to feel Noel's -pulse, and went on talking. - -'It was revealed to the Arab physician as he made merry in his -tents on the wild plains of Hastings that the Presence had a cold -in its head. So he immediately seated himself on the magic carpet, -and bade it bear him hither, only pausing in the flight to purchase -a few sweetmeats in the bazaar.' - -He pulled out a jolly lot of chocolate and some butterscotch, and -grapes for Noel. When we had all said thank you, he went on. - -'The physician's are the words of wisdom: it's high time this kid -was asleep. I have spoken. Ye have my leave to depart.' - -So we bunked, and Dora and Albert's uncle made Noel comfortable for -the night. - -Then they came to the nursery which we had gone down to, and he sat -down in the Guy Fawkes chair and said, 'Now then.' - -Alice said, 'You may tell them what I did. I daresay they'll all -be in a wax, but I don't care.' - -'I think you were very wise,' said Albert's uncle, pulling her -close to him to sit on his knee. 'I am very glad you telegraphed.' - -So then Oswald understood what Alice's secret was. She had gone -out and sent a telegram to Albert's uncle at Hastings. But Oswald -thought she might have told him. Afterwards she told me what she -had put in the telegram. It was, 'Come home. We have given Noel -a cold, and I think we are killing him.' With the address it came -to tenpence-halfpenny. - -Then Albert's uncle began to ask questions, and it all came out, -how Dicky had tried to catch the cold, but the cold had gone to -Noel instead, and about the medicines and all. Albert's uncle -looked very serious. - -'Look here,' he said, 'You're old enough not to play the fool like -this. Health is the best thing you've got; you ought to know -better than to risk it. You might have killed your little brother -with your precious medicines. You've had a lucky escape, -certainly. But poor Noel!' - -'Oh, do you think he's going to die?' Alice asked that, and she was -crying again. - -'No, no,' said Albert's uncle; 'but look here. Do you see how -silly you've been? And I thought you promised your Father -' And -then he gave us a long talking-to. He can make you feel most -awfully Small. At last he stopped, and we said we were very sorry, -and he said, 'You know I promised to take you all to the -pantomime?' - -So we said, 'Yes,' and knew but too well that now he wasn't going -to. Then he went on - - -'Well, I will take you if you like, or I will take Noel to the sea -for a week to cure his cold. Which is it to be?' - -Of course he knew we should say, 'Take Noel' and we did; but Dicky -told me afterwards he thought it was hard on H. O. - -Albert's uncle stayed till Eliza came in, and then he said good -night in a way that showed us that all was forgiven and forgotten. - -And we went to bed. It must have been the middle of the night when -Oswald woke up suddenly, and there was Alice with her teeth -chattering, shaking him to wake him. - -'Oh, Oswald!' she said, 'I am so unhappy. Suppose I should die in -the night!' - -Oswald told her to go to bed and not gas. But she said, 'I must -tell you; I wish I'd told Albert's uncle. I'm a thief, and if I -die to-night I know where thieves go to.' So Oswald saw it was no -good and he sat up in bed and said - 'Go ahead.' So Alice stood -shivering and said - 'I hadn't enough money for the telegram, so I -took the bad sixpence out of the exchequer. And I paid for it with -that and the fivepence I had. And I wouldn't tell you, because if -you'd stopped me doing it I couldn't have borne it; and if you'd -helped me you'd have been a thief too. Oh, what shall I do?' - -Oswald thought a minute, and then he said - - -'You'd better have told me. But I think it will be all right if we -pay it back. Go to bed. Cross with you? No, stupid! Only -another time you'd better not keep secrets.' - -So she kissed Oswald, and he let her, and she went back to bed. - -The next day Albert's uncle took Noel away, before Oswald had time -to persuade Alice that we ought to tell him about the sixpence. -Alice was very unhappy, but not so much as in the night: you can be -very miserable in the night if you have done anything wrong and you -happen to be awake. I know this for a fact. - -None of us had any money except Eliza, and she wouldn't give us any -unless we said what for; and of course we could not do that because -of the honour of the family. And Oswald was anxious to get the -sixpence to give to the telegraph people because he feared that the -badness of that sixpence might have been found out, and that the -police might come for Alice at any moment. I don't think I ever -had such an unhappy day. Of course we could have written to -Albert's uncle, but it would have taken a long time, and every -moment of delay added to Alice's danger. We thought and thought, -but we couldn't think of any way to get that sixpence. It seems a -small sum, but you see Alice's liberty depended on it. It was -quite late in the afternoon when I met Mrs Leslie on the Parade. -She had a brown fur coat and a lot of yellow flowers in her hands. -She stopped to speak to me, and asked me how the Poet was. I told -her he had a cold, and I wondered whether she would lend me -sixpence if I asked her, but I could not make up my mind how to -begin to say it. It is a hard thing to say - much harder than you -would think. She talked to me for a bit, and then she suddenly got -into a cab, and said - - -'I'd no idea it was so late,' and told the man where to go. And -just as she started she shoved the yellow flowers through the -window and said, 'For the sick poet, with my love,' and was driven -off. - -Gentle reader, I will not conceal from you what Oswald did. He -knew all about not disgracing the family, and he did not like doing -what I am going to say: and they were really Noel's flowers, only -he could not have sent them to Hastings, and Oswald knew he would -say 'Yes' if Oswald asked him. Oswald sacrificed his family pride -because of his little sister's danger. I do not say he was a noble -boy - I just tell you what he did, and you can decide for yourself -about the nobleness. - -He put on his oldest clothes - they're much older than any you -would think he had if you saw him when he was tidy - and he took -those yellow chrysanthemums and he walked with them to Greenwich -Station and waited for the trains bringing people from London. He -sold those flowers in penny bunches and got tenpence. Then he went -to the telegraph office at Lewisham, and said to the lady there: - -'A little girl gave you a bad sixpence yesterday. Here are six -good pennies.' - -The lady said she had not noticed it, and never mind, but Oswald -knew that 'Honesty is the best Policy', and he refused to take back -the pennies. So at last she said she should put them in the plate -on Sunday. She is a very nice lady. I like the way she does her -hair. - -Then Oswald went home to Alice and told her, and she hugged him, -and said he was a dear, good, kind boy, and he said 'Oh, it's all -right.' - -We bought peppermint bullseyes with the fourpence I had over, and -the others wanted to know where we got the money, but we would not -tell. - -Only afterwards when Noel came home we told him, because they were -his flowers, and he said it was quite right. He made some poetry -about it. I only remember one bit of it. - - -The noble youth of high degree -Consents to play a menial part, -All for his sister Alice's sake, -Who was so dear to his faithful heart. - - -But Oswald himself has never bragged about it. We got no treasure -out of this, unless you count the peppermint bullseyes. - - - -CHAPTER 13 -THE ROBBER AND THE BURGLAR - - -A day or two after Noel came back from Hastings there was snow; it -was jolly. And we cleared it off the path. A man to do it is -sixpence at least, and you should always save when you can. A -penny saved is a penny earned. And then we thought it would be -nice to clear it off the top of the portico, where it lies so -thick, and the edges as if they had been cut with a knife. And -just as we had got out of the landing-window on to the portico, the -Water Rates came up the path with his book that he tears the thing -out of that says how much you have got to pay, and the little -ink-bottle hung on to his buttonhole in case you should pay him. -Father says the Water Rates is a sensible man, and knows it is -always well to be prepared for whatever happens, however unlikely. -Alice said afterwards that she rather liked the Water Rates, -really, and Noel said he had a face like a good vizier, or the man -who rewards the honest boy for restoring the purse, but we did not -think about these things at the time, and as the Water Rates came -up the steps, we shovelled down a great square slab of snow like an -avalanche - and it fell right on his head . Two of us thought of -it at the same moment, so it was quite a large avalanche. And when -the Water Rates had shaken himself he rang the bell. It was -Saturday, and Father was at home. We know now that it is very -wrong and ungentlemanly to shovel snow off porticoes on to the -Water Rates, or any other person, and we hope he did not catch a -cold, and we are very sorry. We apologized to the Water Rates when -Father told us to. We were all sent to bed for it. - -We all deserved the punishment, because the others would have -shovelled down snow just as we did if they'd thought of it - only -they are not so quick at thinking of things as we are. And even -quite wrong things sometimes lead to adventures; as every one knows -who has ever read about pirates or highwaymen. - -Eliza hates us to be sent to bed early, because it means her having -to bring meals up, and it means lighting the fire in Noel's room -ever so much earlier than usual. He had to have a fire because he -still had a bit of a cold. But this particular day we got Eliza -into a good temper by giving her a horrid brooch with pretending -amethysts in it, that an aunt once gave to Alice, so Eliza brought -up an extra scuttle of coals, and when the greengrocer came with -the potatoes (he is always late on Saturdays) she got some -chestnuts from him. So that when we heard Father go out after his -dinner, there was a jolly fire in Noel's room, and we were able to -go in and be Red Indians in blankets most comfortably. Eliza had -gone out; she says she gets things cheaper on Saturday nights. She -has a great friend, who sells fish at a shop, and he is very -generous, and lets her have herrings for less than half the natural -price. - -So we were all alone in the house; Pincher was out with Eliza, and -we talked about robbers. And Dora thought it would be a dreadful -trade, but Dicky said - - -'I think it would be very interesting. And you would only rob rich -people, and be very generous to the poor and needy, like Claude -Duval.' -Dora said, 'It is wrong to be a robber.' - -'Yes,' said Alice, 'you would never know a happy hour. Think of -trying to sleep with the stolen jewels under your bed, and -remembering all the quantities of policemen and detectives that -there are in the world!' - -'There are ways of being robbers that are not wrong,' said Noel; -'if you can rob a robber it is a right act.' - -'But you can't,' said Dora; 'he is too clever, and besides, it's -wrong anyway.' - -'Yes you can, and it isn't; and murdering him with boiling oil is -a right act, too, so there!' said Noel. 'What about Ali Baba? Now -then!' And we felt it was a score for NoEl. - -'What would you do if there was a robber?' said Alice. - -H. O. said he would kill him with boiling oil; but Alice explained -that she meant a real robber - now - this minute - in the house. - -Oswald and Dicky did not say; but Noel said he thought it would -only be fair to ask the robber quite politely and quietly to go -away, and then if he didn't you could deal with him. - -Now what I am going to tell you is a very strange and wonderful -thing, and I hope you will be able to believe it. I should not, if -a boy told me, unless I knew him to be a man of honour, and perhaps -not then unless he gave his sacred word. But it is true, all the -same, and it only shows that the days of romance and daring deeds -are not yet at an end. - -Alice was just asking Noel how he would deal with the robber who -wouldn't go if he was asked politely and quietly, when we heard a -noise downstairs - quite a plain noise, not the kind of noise you -fancy you hear. It was like somebody moving a chair. We held our -breath and listened and then came another noise, like some one -poking a fire. Now, you remember there was no one to poke a fire -or move a chair downstairs, because Eliza and Father were both out. - -They could not have come in without our hearing them, because the -front door is as hard to shut as the back one, and whichever you go -in by you have to give a slam that you can hear all down the -street. - -H. O. and Alice and Dora caught hold of each other's blankets and -looked at Dicky and Oswald, and every one was quite pale. And Noel -whispered - - -'It's ghosts, I know it is' - and then we listened again, but there -was no more noise. Presently Dora said in a whisper - - -'Whatever shall we do? Oh, whatever shall we do - what shall we -do?' -And she kept on saying it till we had to tell her to shut up. - -O reader, have you ever been playing Red Indians in blankets round -a bedroom fire in a house where you thought there was no one but -you - and then suddenly heard a noise like a chair, and a fire -being poked, downstairs? Unless you have you will not be able to -imagine at all what it feels like. It was not like in books; our -hair did not stand on end at all, and we never said 'Hist!' once, -but our feet got very cold, though we were in blankets by the fire, -and the insides of Oswald's hands got warm and wet, and his nose -was cold like a dog's, and his ears were burning hot. - -The girls said afterwards that they shivered with terror, and their -teeth chattered, but we did not see or hear this at the time. - -'Shall we open the window and call police?' said Dora; and then -Oswald suddenly thought of something, and he breathed more freely -and he said - - -'I know it's not ghosts, and I don't believe it's robbers. I -expect it's a stray cat got in when the coals came this morning, -and she's been hiding in the cellar, and now she's moving about. -Let's go down and see.' - -The girls wouldn't, of course; but I could see that they breathed -more freely too. But Dicky said, 'All right; I will if you will.' - -H. O. said, 'Do you think it's really a cat?' So we said he had -better stay with the girls. And of course after that we had to let -him and Alice both come. Dora said if we took Noel down with his -cold, she would scream 'Fire!' and 'Murder!' and she didn't mind if -the whole street heard. - -So Noel agreed to be getting his clothes on, and the rest of us -said we would go down and look for the cat. - -Now Oswald said that about the cat, and it made it easier to go -down, but in his inside he did not feel at all sure that it might -not be robbers after all. Of course, we had often talked about -robbers before, but it is very different when you sit in a room and -listen and listen and listen; and Oswald felt somehow that it would -be easier to go down and see what it was, than to wait, and listen, -and wait, and wait, and listen, and wait, and then perhaps to hear -It, whatever it was, come creeping slowly up the stairs as softly -as It could with Its boots off, and the stairs creaking, towards -the room where we were with the door open in case of Eliza coming -back suddenly, and all dark on the landings. And then it would -have been just as bad, and it would have lasted longer, and you -would have known you were a coward besides. - -Dicky says he felt all these same things. Many people would say we -were young heroes to go down as we did; so I have tried to explain, -because no young hero wishes to have more credit than he deserves. - -The landing gas was turned down low - just a blue bead - and we -four went out very softly, wrapped in our blankets, and we stood on -the top of the stairs a good long time before we began to go down. -And we listened and listened till our ears buzzed. - -And Oswald whispered to Dicky, and Dicky went into our room and -fetched the large toy pistol that is a foot long, and that has the -trigger broken, and I took it because I am the eldest; and I don't -think either of us thought it was the cat now. But Alice and H. O. -did. Dicky got the poker out of Noel's room, and told Dora it was -to settle the cat with when we caught her. - -Then Oswald whispered, 'Let's play at burglars; Dicky and I are -armed to the teeth, we will go first. You keep a flight behind us, -and be a reinforcement if we are attacked. Or you can retreat and -defend the women and children in the fortress, if you'd rather.' -But they said they would be a reinforcement. - -Oswald's teeth chattered a little when he spoke. It was not with -anything else except cold. - -So Dicky and Oswald crept down, and when we got to the bottom of -the stairs, we saw Father's study door just ajar, and the crack of -light. And Oswald was so pleased to see the light, knowing that -burglars prefer the dark, or at any rate the dark lantern, that he -felt really sure it was the cat after all, and then he thought it -would be fun to make the others upstairs think it was really a -robber. So he cocked the pistol - you can cock it, but it doesn't -go off - and he said, 'Come on, Dick!' and he rushed at the study -door and burst into the room, crying, 'Surrender! you are -discovered! Surrender, or I fire! Throw up your hands!' - -And, as he finished saying it, he saw before him, standing on the -study hearthrug, a Real Robber. There was no mistake about it. -Oswald was sure it was a robber, because it had a screwdriver in -its hands, and was standing near the cupboard door that H. O. broke -the lock off; and there were gimlets and screws and things on the -floor. There is nothing in that cupboard but old ledgers and -magazines and the tool chest, but of course, a robber could not -know that beforehand. - -When Oswald saw that there really was a robber, and that he was so -heavily armed with the screwdriver, he did not feel comfortable. -But he kept the pistol pointed at the robber, and - you will hardly -believe it, but it is true - the robber threw down the screwdriver -clattering on the other tools, and he did throw up his hands, and -said - - -'I surrender; don't shoot me! How many of you are there?' - -So Dicky said, 'You are outnumbered. Are you armed?' - -And the robber said, 'No, not in the least.' - -And Oswald said, still pointing the pistol, and feeling very strong -and brave and as if he was in a book, 'Turn out your pockets.' - -The robber did: and while he turned them Out, we looked at him. He -was of the middle height, and clad in a black frock-coat and grey -trousers. His boots were a little gone at the sides, and his -shirt-cuffs were a bit frayed, but otherwise he was of gentlemanly -demeanour. He had a thin, wrinkled face, with big, light eyes that -sparkled, and then looked soft very queerly, and a short beard. In -his youth it must have been of a fair golden colour, but now it was -tinged with grey. Oswald was sorry for him, especially when he saw -that one of his pockets had a large hole in it, and that he had -nothing in his pockets but letters and string and three boxes of -matches, and a pipe and a handkerchief and a thin tobacco pouch and -two pennies. We made him put all the things on the table, and then -he said - - -'Well, you've caught me; what are you going to do with me? -Police?' - -Alice and H. O. had come down to be reinforcements, when they heard -a shout, and when Alice saw that it was a Real Robber, and that he -had surrendered, she clapped her hands and said, 'Bravo, boys!' and -so did H. O. And now she said, 'If he gives his word of honour not -to escape, I shouldn't call the police: it seems a pity. Wait till -Father comes home.' - -The robber agreed to this, and gave his word of honour, and asked -if he might put on a pipe, and we said 'Yes,' and he sat in -Father's armchair and warmed his boots, which steamed, and I sent -H. O. and Alice to put on some clothes and tell the others, and -bring down Dicky's and my knickerbockers, and the rest of the -chestnuts. - -And they all came, and we sat round the fire, and it was jolly. -The robber was very friendly, and talked to us a great deal. - -'I wasn't always in this low way of business,' he said, when Noel -said something about the things he had turned out of his pockets. -'It's a great come-down to a man like me. But, if I must be -caught, it's something to be caught by brave young heroes like you. - -My stars! How you did bolt into the room, - "Surrender, and up -with your hands!" You might have been born and bred to the -thief-catching.' - -Oswald is sorry if it was mean, but he could not own up just then -that he did not think there was any one in the study when he did -that brave if rash act. He has told since. - -'And what made you think there was any one in the house?' the -robber asked, when he had thrown his head back, and laughed for -quite half a minute. So we told him. And he applauded our valour, -and Alice and H. O. explained that they would have said -'Surrender,' too, only they were reinforcements. -The robber ate some of the chestnuts - and we sat and wondered when -Father would come home, and what he would say to us for our -intrepid conduct. And the robber told us of all the things he had -done before he began to break into houses. Dicky picked up the -tools from the floor, and suddenly he said - - -'Why, this is Father's screwdriver and his gimlets, and all! Well, -I do call it jolly cheek to pick a man's locks with his own tools!' - -'True, true,' said the robber. 'It is cheek, of the jolliest! But -you see I've come down in the world. I was a highway robber once, -but horses are so expensive to hire - five shillings an hour, you -know - and I couldn't afford to keep them. The highwayman business -isn't what it was.' - -'What about a bike?' said H. O. - -But the robber thought cycles were low - and besides you couldn't -go across country with them when occasion arose, as you could with -a trusty steed. And he talked of highwaymen as if he knew just how -we liked hearing it. - -Then he told us how he had been a pirate captain - and how he had -sailed over waves mountains high, and gained rich prizes - and how -he did begin to think that here he had found a profession to his -mind. - -'I don't say there are no ups and downs in it,' he said, -'especially in stormy weather. But what a trade! And a sword at -your side, and the Jolly Roger flying at the peak, and a prize in -sight. And all the black mouths of your guns pointed at the laden -trader - and the wind in your favour, and your trusty crew ready to -live and die for you! Oh - but it's a grand life!' - -I did feel so sorry for him. He used such nice words, and he had -a gentleman's voice. - -'I'm sure you weren't brought up to be a pirate,' said Dora. She -had dressed even to her collar - and made Noel do it too - but the -rest of us were in blankets with just a few odd things put on -anyhow underneath. - -The robber frowned and sighed. - -'No,' he said, 'I was brought up to the law. I was at Balliol, -bless your hearts, and that's true anyway.' He sighed again, and -looked hard at the fire. - -'That was my Father's college,' H. O. was beginning, but Dicky said -- 'Why did you leave off being a pirate?' - -'A pirate?' he said, as if he had not been thinking of such things. - -'Oh, yes; why I gave it up because - because I could not get over -the dreadful sea-sickness.' -'Nelson was sea-sick,' said Oswald. - -'Ah,' said the robber; 'but I hadn't his luck or his pluck, or -something. He stuck to it and won Trafalgar, didn't he? "Kiss me, -Hardy" - and all that, eh? I couldn't stick to it - I had to -resign. And nobody kissed me.' - -I saw by his understanding about Nelson that he was really a man -who had been to a good school as well as to Balliol. - -Then we asked him, 'And what did you do then?' - -And Alice asked if he was ever a coiner, and we told him how we had -thought we'd caught the desperate gang next door, and he was very -much interested and said he was glad he had never taken to coining. - -'Besides, the coins are so ugly nowadays,' he said, 'no one could -really find any pleasure in making them. And it's a -hole-and-corner business at the best, isn't it? - and it must be a -very thirsty one - with the hot metal and furnaces and things.' - -And again he looked at the fire. - -Oswald forgot for a minute that the interesting stranger was a -robber, and asked him if he wouldn't have a drink. Oswald has -heard Father do this to his friends, so he knows it is the right -thing. The robber said he didn't mind if he did. And that is -right, too. - -And Dora went and got a bottle of Father's ale - the Light -Sparkling Family - and a glass, and we gave it to the robber. Dora -said she would be responsible. - -Then when he had had a drink he told us about bandits, but he said -it was so bad in wet weather. Bandits' caves were hardly ever -properly weathertight. And bush-ranging was the same. - -'As a matter of fact,' he said, 'I was bush-ranging this afternoon, -among the furze-bushes on the Heath, but I had no luck. I stopped -the Lord Mayor in his gilt coach, with all his footmen in plush and -gold lace, smart as cockatoos. But it was no go. The Lord Mayor -hadn't a stiver in his pockets. One of the footmen had six new -pennies: the Lord Mayor always pays his servants' wages in new -pennies. I spent fourpence of that in bread and cheese, that on -the table's the tuppence. Ah, it's a poor trade!' And then he -filled his pipe again. - -We had turned out the gas, so that Father should have a jolly good -surprise when he did come home, and we sat and talked as pleasant -as could be. I never liked a new man better than I liked that -robber. And I felt so sorry for him. He told us he had been a -war-correspondent and an editor, in happier days, as well as a -horse-stealer and a colonel of dragoons. - -And quite suddenly, just as we were telling him about Lord -Tottenham and our being highwaymen ourselves, he put up his hand -and said 'Shish!' and we were quiet and listened. - -There was a scrape, scrape, scraping noise; it came from -downstairs. - -'They're filing something,' whispered the robber, 'here - shut up, -give me that pistol, and the poker. There is a burglar now, and no -mistake.' -'It's only a toy one and it won't go off,' I said, 'but you can -cock it.' - -Then we heard a snap. 'There goes the window bar,' said the robber -softly. 'Jove! what an adventure! You kids stay here, I'll tackle -it.' - -But Dicky and I said we should come. So he let us go as far as the -bottom of the kitchen stairs, and we took the tongs and shovel with -us. There was a light in the kitchen; a very little light. It is -curious we never thought, any of us, that this might be a plant of -our robber's to get away. We never thought of doubting his word of -honour. And we were right. - -That noble robber dashed the kitchen door open, and rushed in with -the big toy pistol in one hand and the poker in the other, shouting -out just like Oswald had done - - -'Surrender! You are discovered! Surrender, or I'll fire! Throw -up your hands!' And Dicky and I rattled the tongs and shovel so -that he might know there were more of us, all bristling with -weapons. - -And we heard a husky voice in the kitchen saying - - -'All right, governor! Stow that scent sprinkler. I'll give in. -Blowed if I ain't pretty well sick of the job, anyway.' - -Then we went in. Our robber was standing in the grandest manner -with his legs very wide apart, and the pistol pointing at the -cowering burglar. The burglar was a large man who did not mean to -have a beard, I think, but he had got some of one, and a red -comforter, and a fur cap, and his face was red and his voice was -thick. How different from our own robber! The burglar had a dark -lantern, and he was standing by the plate-basket. When we had lit -the gas we all thought he was very like what a burglar ought to be. - -He did not look as if he could ever have been a pirate or a -highwayman, or anything really dashing or noble, and he scowled and -shuffled his feet and said: 'Well, go on: why don't yer fetch the -pleece?' - -'Upon my word, I don't know,' said our robber, rubbing his chin. -'Oswald, why don't we fetch the police?' - -It is not every robber that I would stand Christian names from, I -can tell you but just then I didn't think of that. I just said - -'Do you mean I'm to fetch one?' - -Our robber looked at the burglar and said nothing. - -Then the burglar began to speak very fast, and to look different -ways with his hard, shiny little eyes. - -'Lookee 'ere, governor,' he said, 'I was stony broke, so help me, -I was. And blessed if I've nicked a haporth of your little lot. -You know yourself there ain't much to tempt a bloke,' he shook the -plate-basket as if he was angry with it, and the yellowy spoons and -forks rattled. 'I was just a-looking through this 'ere -Bank-ollerday show, when you come. Let me off, sir. Come now, -I've got kids of my own at home, strike me if I ain't - same as -yours - I've got a nipper just about 'is size, and what'll come of -them if I'm lagged? I ain't been in it long, sir, and I ain't -'andy at it.' - -'No,' said our robber; 'you certainly are not.' Alice and the -others had come down by now to see what was happening. Alice told -me afterwards they thought it really was the cat this time. - -'No, I ain't 'andy, as you say, sir, and if you let me off this -once I'll chuck the whole blooming bizz; rake my civvy, I will. -Don't be hard on a cove, mister; think of the missis and the kids. -I've got one just the cut of little missy there bless 'er pretty -'eart.' - -'Your family certainly fits your circumstances very nicely,' said -our robber. Then Alice said - - -'Oh, do let him go! If he's got a little girl like me, whatever -will she do? Suppose it was Father!' - -'I don't think he's got a little girl like you, my dear,' said our -robber, 'and I think he'll be safer under lock and key.' - -'You ask yer Father to let me go, miss,' said the burglar; "e won't -'ave the 'art to refuse you.' - -'If I do,' said Alice, 'will you promise never to come back?' - -'Not me, miss,' the burglar said very earnestly, and he looked at -the plate-basket again, as if that alone would be enough to keep -him away, our robber said afterwards. - -'And will you be good and not rob any more?' said Alice. - -'I'll turn over a noo leaf, miss, so help me.' - -Then Alice said - 'Oh, do let him go! I'm sure he'll be good.' - -But our robber said no, it wouldn't be right; we must wait till -Father came home. Then H. O. said, very suddenly and plainly: - -'I don't think it's at all fair, when you're a robber yourself.' - -The minute he'd said it the burglar said, 'Kidded, by gum!' - and -then our robber made a step towards him to catch hold of him, and -before you had time to think 'Hullo!' the burglar knocked the -pistol up with one hand and knocked our robber down with the other, -and was off out of the window like a shot, though Oswald and Dicky -did try to stop him by holding on to his legs. - -And that burglar had the cheek to put his head in at the window and -say, 'I'll give yer love to the kids and the missis' - and he was -off like winking, and there were Alice and Dora trying to pick up -our robber, and asking him whether he was hurt, and where. He -wasn't hurt at all, except a lump at the back of his head. And he -got up, and we dusted the kitchen floor off him. Eliza is a dirty -girl. - -Then he said, 'Let's put up the shutters. It never rains but it -pours. Now you've had two burglars I daresay you'll have twenty.' -So we put up the shutters, which Eliza has strict orders to do -before she goes out, only she never does, and we went back to -Father's study, and the robber said, 'What a night we are having!' -and put his boots back in the fender to go on steaming, and then we -all talked at once. It was the most wonderful adventure we ever -had, though it wasn't treasure-seeking - at least not ours. I -suppose it was the burglar's treasure-seeking, but he didn't get -much - and our robber said he didn't believe a word about those -kids that were so like Alice and me. - -And then there was the click of the gate, and we said, 'Here's -Father,' and the robber said, 'And now for the police.' - -Then we all jumped up. We did like him so much, and it seemed so -unfair that he should be sent to prison, and the horrid, lumping -big burglar not. - -And Alice said, 'Oh, no - run! Dicky will let you out at the back -door. Oh, do go, go now.' - -And we all said, 'Yes, go,' and pulled him towards the door, and -gave him his hat and stick and the things out of his pockets. - -But Father's latchkey was in the door, and it was too late. - -Father came in quickly, purring with the cold, and began to say, -'It's all right, Foulkes, I've got -' And then he stopped short and -stared at us. Then he said, in the voice we all hate, 'Children, -what is the meaning of all this?' And for a minute nobody spoke. - -Then my Father said, 'Foulkes, I must really apologize for these -very naughty -' -And then our robber rubbed his hands and laughed, and cried out: - -'You're mistaken, my dear sir, I'm not Foulkes; I'm a robber, -captured by these young people in the most gallant manner. "Hands -up, surrender, or I fire," and all the rest of it. My word, -Bastable, but you've got some kids worth having! I wish my Denny -had their pluck.' - -Then we began to understand, and it was like being knocked down, it -was so sudden. And our robber told us he wasn't a robber after -all. He was only an old college friend of my Father's, and he had -come after dinner, when Father was just trying to mend the lock H. -O. had broken, to ask Father to get him a letter to a doctor about -his little boy Denny, who was ill. And Father had gone over the -Heath to Vanbrugh Park to see some rich people he knows and get the -letter. And he had left Mr Foulkes to wait till he came back, -because it was important to know at once whether Father could get -the letter, and if he couldn't Mr Foulkes would have had to try -some one else directly. - -We were dumb with amazement. - -Our robber told my Father about the other burglar, and said he was -sorry he'd let him escape, but my Father said, 'Oh, it's all right: -poor beggar; if he really had kids at home: you never can tell - -forgive us our debts, don't you know; but tell me about the first -business. It must have been moderately entertaining.' - -Then our robber told my Father how I had rushed into the room with -a pistol, crying out ... but you know all about that. And he laid -it on so thick and fat about plucky young-uns, and chips of old -blocks, and things like that, that I felt I was purple with shame, -even under the blanket. So I swallowed that thing that tries to -prevent you speaking when you ought to, and I said, 'Look here, -Father, I didn't really think there was any one in the study. We -thought it was a cat at first, and then I thought there was no one -there, and I was just larking. And when I said surrender and all -that, it was just the game, don't you know?' - -Then our robber said, 'Yes, old chap; but when you found there -really was some one there, you dropped the pistol and bunked, -didn't you, eh?' - -And I said, 'No; I thought, "Hullo! here's a robber! Well, it's -all up, I suppose, but I may as well hold on and see what -happens."' - -And I was glad I'd owned up, for Father slapped me on the back, and -said I was a young brick, and our robber said I was no funk anyway, -and though I got very hot under the blanket I liked it, and I -explained that the others would have done the same if they had -thought of it. - -Then Father got up some more beer, and laughed about Dora's -responsibility, and he got out a box of figs he had bought for us, -only he hadn't given it to us because of the Water Rates, and Eliza -came in and brought up the bread and cheese, and what there was -left of the neck of mutton - cold wreck of mutton, Father called it -- and we had a feast - like a picnic - all sitting anywhere, and -eating with our fingers. It was prime. We sat up till past twelve -o'clock, and I never felt so pleased to think I was not born a -girl. It was hard on the others; they would have done just the -same if they'd thought of it. But it does make you feel jolly when -your pater says you're a young brick! - -When Mr Foulkes was going, he said to Alice, 'Good-bye, Hardy.' - -And Alice understood, of course, and kissed him as hard as she -could. - -And she said, 'I wanted to, when you said no one kissed you when -you left off being a pirate.' And he said, 'I know you did, my -dear.' And Dora kissed him too, and said, 'I suppose none of these -tales were true?' - -And our robber just said, 'I tried to play the part properly, my -dear.' - -And he jolly well did play it, and no mistake. We have often seen -him since, and his boy Denny, and his girl Daisy, but that comes in -another story. - -And if any of you kids who read this ever had two such adventures -in one night you can just write and tell me. That's all. - - - -CHAPTER 14 -THE DIVINING-ROD - - -You have no idea how uncomfortable the house was on the day when we -sought for gold with the divining-rod. It was like a -spring-cleaning in the winter-time. All the carpets were up, -because Father had told Eliza to make the place decent as there was -a gentleman coming to dinner the next day. So she got in a -charwoman, and they slopped water about, and left brooms and -brushes on the stairs for people to tumble over. H. O. got a big -bump on his head in that way, and when he said it was too bad, -Eliza said he should keep in the nursery then, and not be where -he'd no business. We bandaged his head with a towel, and then he -stopped crying and played at being England's wounded hero dying in -the cockpit, while every man was doing his duty, as the hero had -told them to, and Alice was Hardy, and I was the doctor, and the -others were the crew. Playing at Hardy made us think of our own -dear robber, and we wished he was there, and wondered if we should -ever see him any more. - -We were rather astonished at Father's having anyone to dinner, -because now he never seems to think of anything but business. -Before Mother died people often came to dinner, and Father's -business did not take up so much of his time and was not the bother -it is now. And we used to see who could go furthest down in our -nightgowns and get nice things to eat, without being seen, out of -the dishes as they came out of the dining-room. Eliza can't cook -very nice things. She told Father she was a good plain cook, but -he says it was a fancy portrait. We stayed in the nursery till the -charwoman came in and told us to be off - she was going to make one -job of it, and have our carpet up as well as all the others, now -the man was here to beat them. It came up, and it was very dusty -- and under it we found my threepenny-bit that I lost ages ago, -which shows what Eliza is. H. O. had got tired of being the -wounded hero, and Dicky was so tired of doing nothing that Dora -said she knew he'd begin to tease Noel in a minute; then of course -Dicky said he wasn't going to tease anybody - he was going out to -the Heath. He said he'd heard that nagging women drove a man from -his home, and now he found it was quite true. Oswald always tries -to be a peacemaker, so he told Dicky to shut up and not make an ass -of himself. And Alice said, 'Well, Dora began - And Dora tossed -her chin up and said it wasn't any business of Oswald's any way, -and no one asked Alice's opinion. So we all felt very -uncomfortable till NoEl said, 'Don't let's quarrel about nothing. -You know let dogs delight - and I made up another piece while you -were talking - - - -Quarrelling is an evil thing, -It fills with gall life's cup; -For when once you begin -It takes such a long time to make it up.' - - -We all laughed then and stopped jawing at each other. Noel is very -funny with his poetry. But that piece happened to come out quite -true. You begin to quarrel and then you can't stop; often, long -before the others are ready to cry and make it up, I see how silly -it is, and I want to laugh; but it doesn't do to say so - for it -only makes the others crosser than they were before. I wonder why -that is? - -Alice said Noel ought to be poet laureate, and she actually went -out in the cold and got some laurel leaves - the spotted kind - out -of the garden, and Dora made a crown and we put it on him. He was -quite pleased; but the leaves made a mess, and Eliza said, 'Don't.' - -I believe that's a word grown-ups use more than any other. Then -suddenly Alice thought of that old idea of hers for finding -treasure, and she said - 'Do let's try the divining-rod.' - -So Oswald said, 'Fair priestess, we do greatly desire to find gold -beneath our land, therefore we pray thee practise with the -divining-rod, and tell us where we can find it.' - -'Do ye desire to fashion of it helms and hauberks?' said Alice. - -'Yes,' said Noel; 'and chains and ouches.' - -'I bet you don't know what an "ouch" is,' said Dicky. - -'Yes I do, so there!' said Noel. 'It's a carcanet. I looked it -out in the dicker, now then!' -We asked him what a carcanet was, but he wouldn't say. - -'And we want to make fair goblets of the gold,' said Oswald. - -'Yes, to drink coconut milk out of,' said H. O. - -'And we desire to build fair palaces of it,' said Dicky. - -'And to buy things,' said Dora; 'a great many things. New Sunday -frocks and hats and kid gloves and -' - -She would have gone on for ever so long only we reminded her that -we hadn't found the gold yet. - -By this Alice had put on the nursery tablecloth, which is green, -and tied the old blue and yellow antimacassar over her head, and -she said - - -'If your intentions are correct, fear nothing and follow me.' - -And she went down into the hall. We all followed chanting -'Heroes.' It is a gloomy thing the girls learnt at the High -School, and we always use it when we want a priestly chant. - -Alice stopped short by the hat-stand, and held up her hands as well -as she could for the tablecloth, and said - - -'Now, great altar of the golden idol, yield me the divining-rod -that I may use it for the good of the suffering people.' - -The umbrella-stand was the altar of the golden idol, and it yielded -her the old school umbrella. She carried it between her palms. - -'Now,' she said, 'I shall sing the magic chant. You mustn't say -anything, but just follow wherever I go - like follow my leader, -you know - and when there is gold underneath the magic rod will -twist in the hand of the priestess like a live thing that seeks to -be free. Then you will dig, and the golden treasure will be -revealed. H. O., if you make that clatter with your boots they'll -come and tell us not to. Now come on all of you.' - -So she went upstairs and down and into every room. We followed her -on tiptoe, and Alice sang as she went. What she sang is not out of -a book - Noel made it up while she was dressing up for the -priestess. - -Ashen rod cold -That here I hold, -Teach me where to find the gold. - - -When we came to where Eliza was, she said, 'Get along with you'; -but Dora said it was only a game, and we wouldn't touch anything, -and our boots were quite clean, and Eliza might as well let us. So -she did. - -It was all right for the priestess, but it was a little dull for -the rest of us, because she wouldn't let us sing, too; so we said -we'd had enough of it, and if she couldn't find the gold we'd leave -off and play something else. The priestess said, 'All right, wait -a minute,' and went on singing. Then we all followed her back into -the nursery, where the carpet was up and the boards smelt of soft -soap. Then she said, 'It moves, it moves! Once more the choral -hymn!' So we sang 'Heroes' again, and in the middle the umbrella -dropped from her hands. - -'The magic rod has spoken,' said Alice; 'dig here, and that with -courage and despatch.' We didn't quite see how to dig, but we all -began to scratch on the floor with our hands, but the priestess -said, 'Don't be so silly! It's the place where they come to do the -gas. The board's loose. Dig an you value your lives, for ere -sundown the dragon who guards this spoil will return in his fiery -fury and make you his unresisting prey.' - -So we dug - that is, we got the loose board up. And Alice threw up -her arms and cried - - -'See the rich treasure - the gold in thick layers, with silver and -diamonds stuck in it!' - -'Like currants in cake,' said H. O. - -'It's a lovely treasure,' said Dicky yawning. 'Let's come back and -carry it away another day.' - -But Alice was kneeling by the hole. - -'Let me feast my eyes on the golden splendour,' she said, 'hidden -these long centuries from the human eye. Behold how the magic rod -has led us to treasures more - Oswald, don't push so! - more bright -than ever monarch - I say, there is something down there, really. -I saw it shine!' - -We thought she was kidding, but when she began to try to get into -the hole, which was much too small, we saw she meant it, so I said, -'Let's have a squint,' and I looked, but I couldn't see anything, -even when I lay down on my stomach. The others lay down on their -stomachs too and tried to see, all but Noel, who stood and looked -at us and said we were the great serpents come down to drink at the -magic pool. He wanted to be the knight and slay the great serpents -with his good sword - he even drew the umbrella ready - but Alice -said, 'All right, we will in a minute. But now - I'm sure I saw -it; do get a match, Noel, there's a dear.' - -'What did you see?' asked Noel, beginning to go for the matches -very slowly. - -'Something bright, away in the corner under the board against the -beam.' - -'Perhaps it was a rat's eye,' Noel said, 'or a snake's,' and we did -not put our heads quite so close to the hole till he came back with -the matches. - -Then I struck a match, and Alice cried, 'There it is!' And there -it was, and it was a half-sovereign, partly dusty and partly -bright. We think perhaps a mouse, disturbed by the carpets being -taken up, may have brushed the dust of years from part of the -half-sovereign with his tail. We can't imagine how it came there, -only Dora thinks she remembers once when H. O. was very little -Mother gave him some money to hold, and he dropped it, and it -rolled all over the floor. So we think perhaps this was part of -it. We were very glad. H. O. wanted to go out at once and buy a -mask he had seen for fourpence. It had been a shilling mask, but -now it was going very cheap because Guy Fawkes' Day was over, and -it was a little cracked at the top. but Dora said, 'I don't know -that it's our money. Let's wait and ask Father.' - -But H. O. did not care about waiting, and I felt for him. Dora is -rather like grown-ups in that way; she does not seem to understand -that when you want a thing you do want it, and that you don't wish -to wait, even a minute. - -So we went and asked Albert-next-door's uncle. He was pegging away -at one of the rotten novels he has to write to make his living, but -he said we weren't interrupting him at all. - -'My hero's folly has involved him in a difficulty,' he said. 'It -is his own fault. I will leave him to meditate on the incredible -fatuity - the hare- brained recklessness - which have brought him -to this pass. It will be a lesson to him. I, meantime, will give -myself unreservedly to the pleasures of your conversation.' - -That's one thing I like Albert's uncle for. He always talks like -a book, and yet you can always understand what he means. I think -he is more like us, inside of his mind, than most grown-up people -are. He can pretend beautifully. I never met anyone else so good -at it, except our robber, and we began it, with him. But it was -Albert's uncle who first taught us how to make people talk like -books when you're playing things, and he made us learn to tell a -story straight from the beginning, not starting in the middle like -most people do. So now Oswald remembered what he had been told, as -he generally does, and began at the beginning, but when he came to -where Alice said she was the priestess, Albert's uncle said - - -'Let the priestess herself set forth the tale in fitting speech.' - -So Alice said, 'O high priest of the great idol, the humblest of -thy slaves took the school umbrella for a divining-rod, and sang -the song of inver - what's-it's-name?' - -'Invocation perhaps?' said Albert's uncle. -'Yes; and then I went about and about and the others got tired, so -the divining-rod fell on a certain spot, and I said, "Dig", and we -dug - it was where the loose board is for the gas men - and then -there really and truly was a half-sovereign lying under the boards, -and here it is.' - -Albert's uncle took it and looked at it. - -'The great high priest will bite it to see if it's good,' he said, -and he did. 'I congratulate you,' he went on; 'you are indeed -among those favoured by the Immortals. First you find half-crowns -in the garden, and now this. The high priest advises you to tell -your Father, and ask if you may keep it. My hero has become -penitent, but impatient. I must pull him out of this scrape. Ye -have my leave to depart.' - -Of course we know from Kipling that that means, 'You'd better bunk, -and be sharp about it,' so we came away. I do like Albert's uncle. - -I shall be like that when I'm a man. He gave us our jungle books, -and he is awfully clever, though he does have to write grown-up -tales. - -We told Father about it that night. He was very kind. He said we -might certainly have the half-sovereign, and he hoped we should -enjoy ourselves with our treasure-trove. - -Then he said, 'Your dear Mother's Indian Uncle is coming to dinner -here to-morrow night. So will you not drag the furniture about -overhead, please, more than you're absolutely obliged; and H. O. -might wear slippers or something. I can always distinguish the -note of H. O.'s boots.' - -We said we would be very quiet, and Father went on - - -'This Indian Uncle is not used to children, and he is coming to -talk business with me. It is really important that he should be -quiet. Do you think, Dora, that perhaps bed at six for H. O. and -Noel -' - -But H. O. said, 'Father, I really and truly won't make a noise. -I'll stand on my head all the evening sooner than disturb the -Indian Uncle with my boots.' - -And Alice said Noel never made a row anyhow. So Father laughed and -said, 'All right.' And he said we might do as we liked with the -half-sovereign. 'Only for goodness' sake don't try to go in for -business with it,' he said. 'It's always a mistake to go into -business with an insufficient capital.' - -We talked it over all that evening, and we decided that as we were -not to go into business with our half-sovereign it was no use not -spending it at once, and so we might as well have a right royal -feast. The next day we went out and bought the things. We got -figs, and almonds and raisins, and a real raw rabbit, and Eliza -promised to cook it for us if we would wait till tomorrow, because -of the Indian Uncle coming to dinner. She was very busy cooking -nice things for him to eat. We got the rabbit because we are so -tired of beef and mutton, and Father hasn't a bill at the poultry -shop. And we got some flowers to go on the dinner-table for -Father's party. And we got hardbake and raspberry noyau and -peppermint rock and oranges and a coconut, with other nice things. -We put it all in the top long drawer. It is H. O.'s play drawer, -and we made him turn his things out and put them in Father's old -portmanteau. H. O. is getting old enough now to learn to be -unselfish, and besides, his drawer wanted tidying very badly. Then -we all vowed by the honour of the ancient House of Bastable that we -would not touch any of the feast till Dora gave the word next day. -And we gave H. O. some of the hardbake, to make it easier for him -to keep his vow. The next day was the most rememorable day in all -our lives, but we didn't know that then. But that is another -story. I think that is such a useful way to know when you can't -think how to end up a chapter. I learnt it from another writer -named Kipling. I've mentioned him before, I believe, but he -deserves it! - - - -CHAPTER 15 -'Lo, THE POOR INDIAN!' - - -It was all very well for Father to ask us not to make a row because -the Indian Uncle was coming to talk business, but my young -brother's boots are not the only things that make a noise. We took -his boots away and made him wear Dora's bath slippers, which are -soft and woolly, and hardly any soles to them; and of course we -wanted to see the Uncle, so we looked over the banisters when he -came, and we were as quiet as mice - but when Eliza had let him in -she went straight down to the kitchen and made the most awful row -you ever heard, it sounded like the Day of judgement, or all the -saucepans and crockery in the house being kicked about the floor, -but she told me afterwards it was only the tea-tray and one or two -cups and saucers, that she had knocked over in her flurry. We -heard the Uncle say, 'God bless my soul!' and then he went into -Father's study and the door was shut - we didn't see him properly -at all that time. - -I don't believe the dinner was very nice. Something got burned I'm -sure - for we smelt it. It was an extra smell, besides the mutton. - -I know that got burned. Eliza wouldn't have any of us in the -kitchen except Dora - till dinner was over. Then we got what was -left of the dessert, and had it on the stairs - just round the -corner where they can't see you from the hall, unless the first -landing gas is lighted. Suddenly the study door opened and the -Uncle came out and went and felt in his greatcoat pocket. It was -his cigar-case he wanted. We saw that afterwards. We got a much -better view of him then. He didn't look like an Indian but just -like a kind of brown, big Englishman, and of course he didn't see -us, but we heard him mutter to himself - - -'Shocking bad dinner! Eh! - what?' - -When he went back to the study he didn't shut the door properly. -That door has always been a little tiresome since the day we took -the lock off to get out the pencil sharpener H. O. had shoved into -the keyhole. We didn't listen - really and truly - but the Indian -Uncle has a very big voice, and Father was not going to be beaten -by a poor Indian in talking or anything else - so he spoke up too, -like a man, and I heard him say it was a very good business, and -only wanted a little capital - and he said it as if it was an -imposition he had learned, and he hated having to say it. The -Uncle said, 'Pooh, pooh!' to that, and then he said he was afraid -that what that same business wanted was not capital but management. - -Then I heard my Father say, 'It is not a pleasant subject: I am -sorry I introduced it. Suppose we change it, sir. Let me fill -your glass.' Then the poor Indian said something about vintage - -and that a poor, broken- down man like he was couldn't be too -careful. And then Father said, 'Well, whisky then,' and afterwards -they talked about Native Races and Imperial something or other and -it got very dull. - -So then Oswald remembered that you must not hear what people do not -intend you to hear - even if you are not listening and he said, 'We -ought not to stay here any longer. Perhaps they would not like us -to hear.' - -Alice said, 'Oh, do you think it could possibly matter?' and went -and shut the study door softly but quite tight. So it was no use -staying there any longer, and we went to the nursery. - -Then Noel said, 'Now I understand. Of course my Father is making -a banquet for the Indian, because he is a poor, broken-down man. -We might have known that from "Lo, the poor Indian!" you know.' - -We all agreed with him, and we were glad to have the thing -explained, because we had not understood before what Father wanted -to have people to dinner for - and not let us come in. - -'Poor people are very proud,' said Alice, 'and I expect Father -thought the Indian would be ashamed, if all of us children knew how -poor he was.' - -Then Dora said, 'Poverty is no disgrace. We should honour honest -Poverty.' - -And we all agreed that that was so. - -'I wish his dinner had not been so nasty,' Dora said, while Oswald -put lumps of coal on the fire with his fingers, so as not to make -a noise. He is a very thoughtful boy, and he did not wipe his -fingers on his trouser leg as perhaps Noel or H. O. would have -done, but he just rubbed them on Dora's handkerchief while she was -talking. - -'I am afraid the dinner was horrid.' Dora went on. 'The table -looked very nice with the flowers we got. I set it myself, and -Eliza made me borrow the silver spoons and forks from -Albert-next-door's Mother.' - -'I hope the poor Indian is honest,' said Dicky gloomily, 'when you -are a poor, broken-down man silver spoons must be a great -temptation.' - -Oswald told him not to talk such tommy-rot because the Indian was -a relation, so of course he couldn't do anything dishonourable. -And Dora said it was all right any way, because she had washed up -the spoons and forks herself and counted them, and they were all -there, and she had put them into their wash-leather bag, and taken -them back to Albert-next-door's Mother. - -'And the brussels sprouts were all wet and swimmy,' she went on, -'and the potatoes looked grey - and there were bits of black in the -gravy - and the mutton was bluey-red and soft in the middle. I saw -it when it came out. The apple-pie looked very nice - but it -wasn't quite done in the apply part. The other thing that was -burnt - you must have smelt it, was the soup.' - -'It is a pity,' said Oswald; 'I don't suppose he gets a good dinner -every day.' - -'No more do we,' said H. O., 'but we shall to-morrow.' - -I thought of all the things we had bought with our half-sovereign -- the rabbit and the sweets and the almonds and raisins and figs -and the coconut: and I thought of the nasty mutton and things, and -while I was thinking about it all Alice said - - -'let's ask the poor Indian to come to dinner with us to-morrow.' -I should have said it myself if she had given me time. - -We got the little ones to go to bed by promising to put a note on -their dressing-table saying what had happened, so that they might -know the first thing in the morning, or in the middle of the night -if they happened to wake up, and then we elders arranged -everything. - -I waited by the back door, and when the Uncle was beginning to go -Dicky was to drop a marble down between the banisters for a signal, -so that I could run round and meet the Uncle as he came out. - -This seems like deceit, but if you are a thoughtful and considerate -boy you will understand that we could not go down and say to the -Uncle in the hall under Father's eye, 'Father has given you a -beastly, nasty dinner, but if you will come to dinner with us -tomorrow, we will show you our idea of good things to eat.' You -will see, if you think it over, that this would not have been at -all polite to Father. - -So when the Uncle left, Father saw him to the door and let him out, -and then went back to the study, looking very sad, Dora says. - -As the poor Indian came down our steps he saw me there at the gate. - -I did not mind his being poor, and I said, 'Good evening, Uncle,' -just as politely as though he had been about to ascend into one of -the gilded chariots of the rich and affluent, instead of having to -walk to the station a quarter of a mile in the mud, unless he had -the money for a tram fare. - -'Good evening, Uncle.' I said it again, for he stood staring at -me. I don't suppose he was used to politeness from boys - some -boys are anything but - especially to the Aged Poor. - -So I said, 'Good evening, Uncle,' yet once again. Then he said - - -'Time you were in bed, young man. Eh! - what?' - -Then I saw I must speak plainly with him, man to man. So I did. -I said - - -'You've been dining with my Father, and we couldn't help hearing -you say the dinner was shocking. So we thought as you're an -Indian, perhaps you're very poor' - I didn't like to tell him we -had heard the dreadful truth from his own lips, so I went on, -'because of "Lo, the poor Indian" - you know - and you can't get a -good dinner every day. And we are very sorry if you're poor; and -won't you come and have dinner with us to-morrow - with us -children, I mean? It's a very, very good dinner - rabbit, and -hardbake, and coconut - and you needn't mind us knowing you re -poor, because we know honourable poverty is no disgrace, and -' I -could have gone on much longer, but he interrupted me to say - -'Upon my word! And what's your name, eh?' - -'Oswald Bastable,' I said; and I do hope you people who are reading -this story have not guessed before that I was Oswald all the time. - -'Oswald Bastable, eh? Bless my soul!' said the poor Indian. 'Yes, -I'll dine with you, Mr Oswald Bastable, with all the pleasure in -life. Very kind and cordial invitation, I'm sure. Good night, -sir. At one o'clock, I presume?' - -'Yes, at one,' I said. 'Good night, sir.' - -Then I went in and told the others, and we wrote a paper and put it -on the boy's dressing- table, and it said - - -'The poor Indian is coming at one. He seemed very grateful to me -for my kindness.' - -We did not tell Father that the Uncle was coming to dinner with us, -for the polite reason that I have explained before. But we had to -tell Eliza; so we said a friend was coming to dinner and we wanted -everything very nice. I think she thought it was Albert-next-door, -but she was in a good temper that day, and she agreed to cook the -rabbit and to make a pudding with currants in it. And when one -o'clock came the Indian Uncle came too. I let him in and helped -him off with his greatcoat, which was all furry inside, and took -him straight to the nursery. We were to have dinner there as -usual, for we had decided from the first that he would enjoy -himself more if he was not made a stranger of. We agreed to treat -him as one of ourselves, because if we were too polite, he might -think it was our pride because he was poor. - -He shook hands with us all and asked our ages, and what schools we -went to, and shook his head when we said we were having a holiday -just now. I felt rather uncomfortable - I always do when they talk -about schools - and I couldn't think of anything to say to show him -we meant to treat him as one of ourselves. I did ask if he played -cricket. He said he had not played lately. And then no one said -anything till dinner came in. We had all washed our faces and -hands and brushed our hair before he came in, and we all looked -very nice, especially Oswald, who had had his hair cut that very -morning. When Eliza had brought in the rabbit and gone out again, -we looked at each other in silent despair, like in books. It -seemed as if it were going to be just a dull dinner like the one -the poor Indian had had the night before; only, of course, the -things to eat would be nicer. Dicky kicked Oswald under the table -to make him say something - and he had his new boots on, too! - but -Oswald did not kick back; then the Uncle asked - - -'Do you carve, sir, or shall I?' - -Suddenly Alice said - - -'Would you like grown-up dinner, Uncle, or play-dinner?' - -He did not hesitate a moment, but said, 'Play-dinner, by all means. - -Eh! - what?' and then we knew it was all right. - -So we at once showed the Uncle how to be a dauntless hunter. The -rabbit was the deer we had slain in the green forest with our -trusty yew bows, and we toasted the joints of it, when the Uncle -had carved it, on bits of firewood sharpened to a point. The -Uncle's piece got a little burnt, but he said it was delicious, and -he said game was always nicer when you had killed it yourself. -When Eliza had taken away the rabbit bones and brought in the -pudding, we waited till she had gone out and shut the door, and -then we put the dish down on the floor and slew the pudding in the -dish in the good old-fashioned way. It was a wild boar at bay, and -very hard indeed to kill, even with forks. The Uncle was very -fierce indeed with the pudding, and jumped and howled when he -speared it, but when it came to his turn to be helped, he said, -'No, thank you; think of my liver. Eh! - what?' - -But he had some almonds and raisins - when we had climbed to the -top of the chest of drawers to pluck them from the boughs of the -great trees; and he had a fig from the cargo that the rich -merchants brought in their ship - the long drawer was the ship - -and the rest of us had the sweets and the coconut. It was a very -glorious and beautiful feast, and when it was over we said we hoped -it was better than the dinner last night. And he said: - -'I never enjoyed a dinner more.' He was too polite to say what he -really thought about Father's dinner. And we saw that though he -might be poor, he was a true gentleman. - -He smoked a cigar while we finished up what there was left to eat, -and told us about tiger shooting and about elephants. We asked him -about wigwams, and wampum, and mocassins, and beavers, but he did -not seem to know, or else he was shy about talking of the wonders -of his native land. - -We liked him very much indeed, and when he was going at last, Alice -nudged me, and I said - 'There's one and threepence farthing left -out of our half-sovereign. Will you take it, please, because we do -like you very much indeed, and we don't want it, really; and we -would rather you had it.' And I put the money into his hand. - -'I'll take the threepenny-bit,' he said, turning the money over and -looking at it, 'but I couldn't rob you of the rest. By the way, -where did you get the money for this most royal spread - half a -sovereign you said - eh, what?' - -We told him all about the different ways we had looked for -treasure, and when we had been telling some time he sat down, to -listen better and at last we told him how Alice had played at -divining-rod, and how it really had found a half-sovereign. - -Then he said he would like to see her do it again. But we -explained that the rod would only show gold and silver, and that we -were quite sure there was no more gold in the house, because we -happened to have looked very carefully. - -'Well, silver, then,' said he; 'let's hide the plate-basket, and -little Alice shall make the divining-rod find it. Eh! - what?' - -'There isn't any silver in the plate-basket now,' Dora said. -'Eliza asked me to borrow the silver spoons and forks for your -dinner last night from Albert-next-door's Mother. Father never -notices, but she thought it would be nicer for you. Our own silver -went to have the dents taken out; and I don't think Father could -afford to pay the man for doing it, for the silver hasn't come -back.' - -'Bless my soul!' said the Uncle again, looking at the hole in the -big chair that we burnt when we had Guy Fawkes' Day indoors. 'And -how much pocket-money do you get? Eh! - what?' - -'We don't have any now,' said Alice; 'but indeed we don't want the -other shilling. We'd much rather you had it, wouldn't we?' - -And the rest of us said, 'Yes.' The Uncle wouldn't take it, but he -asked a lot of questions, and at last he went away. And when he -went he said - - -'Well, youngsters, I've enjoyed myself very much. I shan't forget -your kind hospitality. Perhaps the poor Indian may be in a -position to ask you all to dinner some day.' - -Oswald said if he ever could we should like to come very much, but -he was not to trouble to get such a nice dinner as ours, because we -could do very well with cold mutton and rice pudding. We do not -like these things, but Oswald knows how to behave. Then the poor -Indian went away. - -We had not got any treasure by this party, but we had had a very -good time, and I am sure the Uncle enjoyed himself. - -We were so sorry he was gone that we could none of us eat much tea; -but we did not mind, because we had pleased the poor Indian and -enjoyed ourselves too. Besides, as Dora said, 'A contented mind is -a continual feast,' so it did not matter about not wanting tea. - -Only H. O. did not seem to think a continual feast was a contented -mind, and Eliza gave him a powder in what was left of the -red-currant jelly Father had for the nasty dinner. - -But the rest of us were quite well, and I think it must have been -the coconut with H. O. We hoped nothing had disagreed with the -Uncle, but we never knew. - - - -CHAPTER 16 -THE END OF THE TREASURE-SEEKING - - -Now it is coming near the end of our treasure-seeking, and the end -was so wonderful that now nothing is like It used to be. It is -like as if our fortunes had been in an earthquake, and after those, -you know, everything comes out wrong-way up. - -The day after the Uncle speared the pudding with us opened in gloom -and sadness. But you never know. It was destined to be a day when -things happened. Yet no sign of this appeared in the early -morning. Then all was misery and upsetness. None of us felt quite -well; I don't know why: and Father had one of his awful colds, so -Dora persuaded him not to go to London, but to stay cosy and warm -in the study, and she made him some gruel. She makes it better -than Eliza does; Eliza's gruel is all little lumps, and when you -suck them it is dry oatmeal inside. - -We kept as quiet as we could, and I made H. O. do some lessons, -like the G. B. had advised us to. But it was very dull. There are -some days when you seem to have got to the end of all the things -that could ever possibly happen to you, and you feel you will spend -all the rest of your life doing dull things just the same way. -Days like this are generally wet days. But, as I said, you never -know. - -Then Dicky said if things went on like this he should run away to -sea, and Alice said she thought it would be rather nice to go into -a convent. H. O. was a little disagreeable because of the powder -Eliza had given him, so he tried to read two books at once, one -with each eye, just because Noel wanted one of the books, which was -very selfish of him, so it only made his headache worse. H. O. is -getting old enough to learn by experience that it is wrong to be -selfish, and when he complained about his head Oswald told him -whose fault it was, because I am older than he is, and it is my -duty to show him where he is wrong. But he began to cry, and then -Oswald had to cheer him up because of Father wanting to be quiet. -So Oswald said - - -'They'll eat H. O. if you don't look out!' And Dora said Oswald -was too bad. - -Of course Oswald was not going to interfere again, so he went to -look out of the window and see the trams go by, and by and by H. O. -came and looked out too, and Oswald, who knows when to be generous -and forgiving, gave him a piece of blue pencil and two nibs, as -good as new, to keep. - -As they were looking out at the rain splashing on the stones in the -street they saw a four-wheeled cab come lumbering up from the way -the station is. Oswald called out - - -'Here comes the coach of the Fairy Godmother. It'll stop here, you -see if it doesn't!' - -So they all came to the window to look. Oswald had only said that -about stopping and he was stricken with wonder and amaze when the -cab really did stop. It had boxes on the top and knobby parcels -sticking out of the window, and it was something like going away to -the seaside and something like the gentleman who takes things about -in a carriage with the wooden shutters up, to sell to the drapers' -shops. The cabman got down, and some one inside handed out ever so -many parcels of different shapes and sizes, and the cabman stood -holding them in his arms and grinning over them. - -Dora said, 'It is a pity some one doesn't tell him this isn't the -house.' And then from inside the cab some one put out a foot -feeling for the step, like a tortoise's foot coming out from under -his shell when you are holding him off the ground, and then a leg -came and more parcels, and then Noel cried - - -'It's the poor Indian!' - -And it was. - -Eliza opened the door, and we were all leaning over the banisters. -Father heard the noise of parcels and boxes in the hall, and he -came out without remembering how bad his cold was. If you do that -yourself when you have a cold they call you careless and naughty. -Then we heard the poor Indian say to Father - - -'I say, Dick, I dined with your kids yesterday - as I daresay -they've told you. jolliest little cubs I ever saw! Why didn't you -let me see them the other night? The eldest is the image of poor -Janey - and as to young Oswald, he's a man! If he's not a man, I'm -a nigger! Eh! - what? And Dick, I say, I shouldn't wonder if I -could find a friend to put a bit into that business of yours - eh?' - -Then he and Father went into the study and the door was shut - and -we went down and looked at the parcels. Some were done up in old, -dirty newspapers, and tied with bits of rag, and some were in brown -paper and string from the shops, and there were boxes. We wondered -if the Uncle had come to stay and this was his luggage, or whether -it was to sell. Some of it smelt of spices, like merchandise - and -one bundle Alice felt certain was a bale. We heard a hand on the -knob of the study door after a bit, and Alice said - - -'Fly!' and we all got away but H. O., and the Uncle caught him by -the leg as he was trying to get upstairs after us. - -'Peeping at the baggage, eh?' said the Uncle, and the rest of us -came down because it would have been dishonourable to leave H. O. -alone in a scrape, and we wanted to see what was in the parcels. - -'I didn't touch,' said H. O. 'Are you coming to stay? I hope you -are.' - -'No harm done if you did touch,' said the good, kind, Indian man to -all of us. 'For all these parcels are for you.' - -I have several times told you about our being dumb with amazement -and terror and joy, and things like that, but I never remember us -being dumber than we were when he said this. - -The Indian Uncle went on: 'I told an old friend of mine what a -pleasant dinner I had with you, and about the threepenny-bit, and -the divining-rod, and all that, and he sent all these odds and ends -as presents for you. Some of the things came from India.' - -'Have you come from India, Uncle?' Noel asked; and when he said -'Yes' we were all very much surprised, for we never thought of his -being that sort of Indian. We thought he was the Red kind, and of -course his not being accounted for his ignorance of beavers and -things. - -He got Eliza to help, and we took all the parcels into the nursery -and he undid them and undid them and undid them, till the papers -lay thick on the floor. Father came too and sat in the Guy Fawkes -chair. I cannot begin to tell you all the things that kind friend -of Uncle's had sent us. He must be a very agreeable person. - -There were toys for the kids and model engines for Dick and me, and -a lot of books, and Japanese china tea-sets for the girls, red and -white and gold - there were sweets by the pound and by the box - -and long yards and yards of soft silk from India, to make frocks -for the girls - and a real Indian sword for Oswald and a book of -Japanese pictures for Noel, and some ivory chess men for Dicky: the -castles of the chessmen are elephant-and-castles. There is a -railway station called that; I never knew what it meant before. -The brown paper and string parcels had boxes of games in them - and -big cases of preserved fruits and things. And the shabby old -newspaper parcels and the boxes had the Indian things in. I never -saw so many beautiful things before. There were carved fans and -silver bangles and strings of amber beads, and necklaces of uncut -gems - turquoises and garnets, the Uncle said they were - and -shawls and scarves of silk, and cabinets of brown and gold, and -ivory boxes and silver trays, and brass things. The Uncle kept -saying, 'This is for you, young man,' or 'Little Alice will like -this fan,'or 'Miss Dora would look well in this green silk, I -think. Eh! - what?' - -And Father looked on as if it was a dream, till the Uncle suddenly -gave him an ivory paper-knife and a box of cigars, and said, 'My -old friend sent you these, Dick; he's an old friend of yours too, -he says.' And he winked at my Father, for H. O. and I saw him. -And my Father winked back, though he has always told us not to. - -That was a wonderful day. It was a treasure, and no mistake! I -never saw such heaps and heaps of presents, like things out of a -fairy-tale - and even Eliza had a shawl. Perhaps she deserved it, -for she did cook the rabbit and the pudding; and Oswald says it is -not her fault if her nose turns up and she does not brush her hair. - -I do not think Eliza likes brushing things. It is the same with -the carpets. But Oswald tries to make allowances even for people -who do not wash their ears. - -The Indian Uncle came to see us often after that, and his friend -always sent us something. Once he tipped us a sovereign each - the -Uncle brought it; and once he sent us money to go to the Crystal -Palace, and the Uncle took us; and another time to a circus; and -when Christmas was near the Uncle said - -'You remember when I dined with you, some time ago, you promised to -dine with me some day, if I could ever afford to give a -dinner-party. Well, I'm going to have one - a Christmas party. -Not on Christmas Day, because every one goes home then - but on the -day after. Cold mutton and rice pudding. You'll come? Eh! - -what?' - -We said we should be delighted, if Father had no objection, because -that is the proper thing to say, and the poor Indian, I mean the -Uncle, said, 'No, your Father won't object - he's coming too, bless -your soul!' - -We all got Christmas presents for the Uncle. The girls made him a -handkerchief case and a comb bag, out of some of the pieces of silk -he had given them. I got him a knife with three blades; H. O. got -a siren whistle, a very strong one, and Dicky joined with me in the -knife, and Noel would give the Indian ivory box that Uncle's friend -had sent on the wonderful Fairy Cab day. He said it was the very -nicest thing he had, and he was sure Uncle wouldn't mind his not -having bought it with his own money. - -I think Father's business must have got better - perhaps Uncle's -friend put money in it and that did it good, like feeding the -starving. Anyway we all had new suits, and the girls had the green -silk from India made into frocks, and on Boxing Day we went in two -cabs - Father and the girls in one, and us boys in the other. - -We wondered very much where the Indian Uncle lived, because we had -not been told. And we thought when the cab began to go up the hill -towards the Heath that perhaps the Uncle lived in one of the poky -little houses up at the top of Greenwich. But the cab went right -over the Heath and in at some big gates, and through a shrubbery -all white with frost like a fairy forest, because it was Christmas -time. And at last we stopped before one of those jolly, big, ugly -red houses with a lot of windows, that are so comfortable inside, -and on the steps was the Indian Uncle, looking very big and grand, -in a blue cloth coat and yellow sealskin waistcoat, with a bunch of -seals hanging from it. - -'I wonder whether he has taken a place as butler here?' said Dicky. - -'A poor, broken-down man -' - -Noel thought it was very likely, because he knew that in these big -houses there were always thousands of stately butlers. - -The Uncle came down the steps and opened the cab door himself, -which I don't think butlers would expect to have to do. And he -took us in. It was a lovely hall, with bear and tiger skins on the -floor, and a big clock with the faces of the sun and moon dodging -out when it was day or night, and Father Time with a scythe coming -out at the hours, and the name on it was 'Flint. Ashford. 1776'; -and there was a fox eating a stuffed duck in a glass case, and -horns of stags and other animals over the doors. - -'We'll just come into my study first,' said the Uncle, 'and wish -each other a Merry Christmas.' So then we knew he wasn't the -butler, but it must be his own house, for only the master of the -house has a study. - -His study was not much like Father's. It had hardly any books, but -swords and guns and newspapers and a great many boots, and boxes -half unpacked, with more Indian things bulging out of them. - -We gave him our presents and he was awfully pleased. Then he gave -us his Christmas presents. You must be tired of hearing about -presents, but I must remark that all the Uncle's presents were -watches; there was a watch for each of us, with our names engraved -inside, all silver except H. O.'s, and that was a Waterbury, 'To -match his boots,' the Uncle said. I don't know what he meant. - -Then the Uncle looked at Father, and Father said, 'You tell them, -sir.' - -So the Uncle coughed and stood up and made a speech. He said - - -'Ladies and gentlemen, we are met together to discuss an important -subject which has for some -weeks engrossed the attention of the honourable member opposite and -myself.' - -I said, 'Hear, hear,' and Alice whispered, 'What happened to the -guinea-pig?' Of course you know the answer to that. - -The Uncle went on - - -'I am going to live in this house, and as it's rather big for me, -your Father has agreed that he and you shall come and live with me. - -And so, if you're agreeable, we're all going to live here together, -and, please God, it'll be a happy home for us all. Eh! - what?' - -He blew his nose and kissed us all round. As it was Christmas I -did not mind, though I am much too old for it on other dates. Then -he said, 'Thank you all very much for your presents; but I've got -a present here I value more than anything else I have.' - -I thought it was not quite polite of him to say so, till I saw that -what he valued so much was a threepenny-bit on his watch-chain, -and, of course, I saw it must be the one we had given him. - -He said, 'You children gave me that when you thought I was the poor -Indian, and I'll keep it as long as I live. And I've asked some -friends to help us to be jolly, for this is our house-warming. Eh! -- what?' - -Then he shook Father by the hand, and they blew their noses; and -then Father said, 'Your Uncle has been most kind - most -' - -But Uncle interrupted by saying, 'Now, Dick, no nonsense!' -Then H. O. said, 'Then you're not poor at all?' as if he were very -disappointed. -The Uncle replied, 'I have enough for my simple wants, thank you, -H. O.; and your Father's business will provide him with enough for -yours. Eh! - what?' - -Then we all went down and looked at the fox thoroughly, and made -the Uncle take the glass off so that we could see it all round and -then the Uncle took us all over the house, which is the most -comfortable one I have ever been in. There is a beautiful portrait -of Mother in Father's sitting-room. The Uncle must be very rich -indeed. This ending is like what happens in Dickens's books; but -I think it was much jollier to happen like a book, and it shows -what a nice man the Uncle is, the way he did it all. - -Think how flat it would have been if the Uncle had said, when we -first offered him the one and threepence farthing, 'Oh, I don't -want your dirty one and three-pence! I'm very rich indeed.' -Instead of which he saved up the news of his wealth till Christmas, -and then told us all in one glorious burst. Besides, I can't help -it if it is like Dickens, because it happens this way. Real life -is often something like books. - -Presently, when we had seen the house, we were taken into the -drawing-room, and there was Mrs Leslie, who gave us the shillings -and wished us good hunting, and Lord Tottenham, and -Albert-next-door's Uncle - and Albert-next-door, and his Mother -(I'm not very fond of her), and best of all our own Robber and his -two kids, and our Robber had a new suit on. The Uncle told us he -had asked the people who had been kind to us, and Noel said, 'Where -is my noble editor that I wrote the poetry to?' - -The Uncle said he had not had the courage to ask a strange editor -to dinner; but Lord Tottenham was an old friend of Uncle's, and he -had introduced Uncle to Mrs Leslie, and that was how he had the -pride and pleasure of welcoming her to our house-warming. And he -made her a bow like you see on a Christmas card. - -Then Alice asked, 'What about Mr Rosenbaum? He was kind; it would -have been a pleasant surprise for him.' - -But everybody laughed, and Uncle said - - -'Your father has paid him the sovereign he lent you. I don't think -he could have borne another pleasant surprise.' - -And I said there was the butcher, and he was really kind; but they -only laughed, and Father said you could not ask all your business -friends to a private dinner. - -Then it was dinner-time, and we thought of Uncle's talk about cold -mutton and rice. But it was a beautiful dinner, and I never saw -such a dessert! We had ours on plates to take away into another -sitting-room, which was much jollier than sitting round the table -with the grown-ups. But the Robber's kids stayed with their -Father. They were very shy and frightened, and said hardly -anything, but looked all about with very bright eyes. H. O. -thought they were like white mice; but afterwards we got to know -them very well, and in the end they were not so mousy. And there -is a good deal of interesting stuff to tell about them; but I shall -put all that in another book, for there is no room for it in this -one. We played desert islands all the afternoon and drank Uncle's -health in ginger wine. It was H. O. that upset his over Alice's -green silk dress, and she never even rowed him. Brothers ought not -to have favourites, and Oswald would never be so mean as to have a -favourite sister, or, if he had, wild horses should not make him -tell who it was. - -And now we are to go on living in the big house on the Heath, and -it is very jolly. - -Mrs Leslie often comes to see us, and our own Robber and -Albert-next-door's uncle. The Indian Uncle likes him because he -has been in India too and is brown; but our Uncle does not like -Albert-next-door. He says he is a muff. And I am to go to Rugby, -and so are Noel and H. O., and perhaps to Balliol afterwards. -Balliol is my Father's college. It has two separate coats of arms, -which many other colleges are not allowed. Noel is going to be a -poet and Dicky wants to go into Father's business. - -The Uncle is a real good old sort; and just think, we should never -have found him if we hadn't made up our minds to be Treasure -Seekers! Noel made a poem about it - - - -Lo! the poor Indian from lands afar, -Comes where the treasure seekers are; -We looked for treasure, but we find -The best treasure of all is the Uncle good and kind. - - -I thought it was rather rot, but Alice would show it to the Uncle, -and he liked it very much. He kissed Alice and he smacked Noel on -the back, and he said, 'I don't think I've done so badly either, if -you come to that, though I was never a regular professional -treasure seeker. Eh! - what?' - - - - - -****End of the Project Gutenberg Etext of The Story of the Treasure -Seekers by E. Nesbit**** - |