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diff --git a/old/8insm10h.htm b/old/8insm10h.htm new file mode 100644 index 0000000..f653a22 --- /dev/null +++ b/old/8insm10h.htm @@ -0,0 +1,16053 @@ +<!DOCTYPE HTML PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD HTML 4.01 Transitional//EN"> +<HTML> +<HEAD> +<TITLE>The Project Gutenberg eBook of Indian Summer, by William D. Howells</TITLE> +<META HTTP-EQUIV="content-Type" CONTENT="text/html; charset=iso-8859-1"> + <style type="text/css"> + <!-- + * { font-family: Times;} + P { text-indent: 1em; + margin-top: .75em; + font-size: 14pt; + margin-bottom: .75em; } + H1,H2,H3,H4,H5,H6 { text-align: center; } + HR { width: 33%; } + // --> + </style> +</HEAD> +<BODY> +<H1>The Project Gutenberg eBook of Indian Summer, +<br>by William D. Howells</H1> + +<PRE> +Copyright laws are changing all over the world. Be sure to check the +copyright laws for your country before downloading or redistributing +this or any other Project Gutenberg eBook. + +This header should be the first thing seen when viewing this Project +Gutenberg file. Please do not remove it. Do not change or edit the +header without written permission. + +Please read the "legal small print," and other information about the +eBook and Project Gutenberg at the bottom of this file. Included is +important information about your specific rights and restrictions in +how the file may be used. You can also find out about how to make a +donation to Project Gutenberg, and how to get involved. + + +**Welcome To The World of Free Plain Vanilla Electronic Texts** + +**eBooks Readable By Both Humans and By Computers, Since 1971** + +*****These eBooks Were Prepared By Thousands of Volunteers!***** + + +Title: Indian Summer + +Author: William D. Howells + +Release Date: January, 2005 [EBook #7359] +[This file was first posted on April 20, 2003] +[Most recently updated May 3, 2003] + +Edition: 10 + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO Latin-1 + +*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK, INDIAN SUMMER *** + + + + +David Garcia, Eric Eldred, Charles Franks, and the Online Distributed +Proofreaders Team +</PRE> + + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <h1> + INDIAN SUMMER + </h1> + <center> + <b>BY<br> + <br> + WILLIAM D. HOWELLS<br> + <br> + <br> + AUTHOR OF "THE RISE OF SILAS LAPHAM," "A MODERN INSTANCE," + "WOMAN'S REASON," ETC.</b> + </center> + + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <center> + <b>INDIAN SUMMER</b> + </center> + <hr> + <a name="I"><!--Marker--></a> + <h2> + I + </h2> + <p> + Midway of the Ponte Vecchio at Florence, where three arches + break the lines of the little jewellers' booths glittering on + either hand, and open an approach to the parapet, Colville + lounged against the corner of a shop and stared out upon the + river. It was the late afternoon of a day in January, which + had begun bright and warm, but had suffered a change of mood + as its hours passed, and now, from a sky dimmed with flying + grey clouds, was threatening rain. There must already have + been rain in the mountains, for the yellow torrent that + seethed and swirled around the piers of the bridge was + swelling momently on the wall of the Lung' Arno, and rolling + a threatening flood toward the Cascine, where it lost itself + under the ranks of the poplars that seemed to file across its + course, and let their delicate tops melt into the pallor of + the low horizon. + </p> + <p> + The city, with the sweep of the Lung' Arno on either hand, + and its domes and towers hung in the dull air, and the + country with its white villas and black cypresses breaking + the grey stretches of the olive orchards on its hill-sides, + had alike been growing more and more insufferable; and + Colville was finding a sort of vindictive satisfaction in the + power to ignore the surrounding frippery of landscape and + architecture. He isolated himself so perfectly from it, as he + brooded upon the river, that, for any sensible difference, he + might have been standing on the Main Street Bridge at Des + Vaches, Indiana, looking down at the tawny sweep of the + Wabash. He had no love for that stream, nor for the ambitious + town on its banks, but ever since he woke that morning he had + felt a growing conviction that he had been a great ass to + leave them. He had, in fact, taken the prodigious risk of + breaking his life sharp off from the course in which it had + been set for many years, and of attempting to renew it in a + direction from which it had long been diverted. Such an act + could be precipitated only by a strong impulse of conscience + or a profound disgust, and with Colville it sprang from + disgust. He had experienced a bitter disappointment in the + city to whose prosperity he had given the energies of his + best years, and in whose favour he imagined that he had + triumphantly established himself. + </p> + <p> + He had certainly made the Des Vaches + <i>Democrat-Republican</i> a very good paper; its ability was + recognised throughout the State, and in Des Vaches people of + all parties were proud of it. They liked every morning to see + what Colville said; they believed that in his way he was the + smartest man in the State, and they were fond of claiming + that there was no such writer on any of the Indianapolis + papers. They forgave some political heresies to the talent + they admired; they permitted him the whim of free trade, they + laughed tolerantly when he came out in favour of civil + service reform, and no one had much fault to find when the + <i>Democrat-Republican</i> bolted the nomination of a certain + politician of its party for Congress. But when Colville + permitted his own name to be used by the opposing party, the + people arose in their might and defeated him by a tremendous + majority. That was what the regular nominee said. It was a + withering rebuke to treason, in the opinion of this + gentleman; it was a good joke, anyway, with the Democratic + managers who had taken Colville up, being all in the + Republican family; whichever it was, it was a mortification + for Colville which his pride could not brook. He stood + disgraced before the community not only as a theorist and + unpractical doctrinaire, but as a dangerous man; and what was + worse, he could not wholly acquit himself of a measure of bad + faith; his conscience troubled him even more than his pride. + Money was found, and a printer bought up with it to start a + paper in opposition to the <i>Democrat-Republican</i>. Then + Colville contemptuously offered to sell out to the Republican + committee in charge of the new enterprise, and they accepted + his terms. + </p> + <p> + In private life he found much of the old kindness returning + to him; and his successful opponent took the first + opportunity of heaping coals of fire on his head in the + public street, when he appeared to the outer eye to be + shaking hands with Colville. During the months that he + remained to close up his affairs after the sale of his paper, + the <i>Post-Democrat-Republican</i> (the newspaper had + agglutinated the titles of two of its predecessors, after the + fashion of American journals) was fulsome in its + complimentary allusions to him. It politely invented the + fiction that he was going to Europe for his health, impaired + by his journalistic labours, and adventurously promised its + readers that they might hope to hear from him from time to + time in its columns. In some of its allusions to him Colville + detected the point of a fine irony, of which he had himself + introduced the practice in the <i>Democrat-Republican</i>; + and he experienced, with a sense of personal impoverishment, + the curious fact that a journalist of strong characteristics + leaves the tradition of himself in such degree with the + journal he has created that he seems to bring very little + away. He was obliged to confess in his own heart that the + paper was as good as ever. The assistants, who had trained + themselves to write like him, seemed to be writing quite as + well, and his honesty would not permit him to receive the + consolation offered him by the friends who told him that + there was a great falling off in the + <i>Post-Democrat-Republican</i>. Except that it was rather + more Stalwart in its Republicanism, and had turned quite + round on the question of the tariff, it was very much what it + had always been. It kept the old decency of tone which he had + given it, and it maintained the literary character which he + was proud of. The new management must have divined that its + popularity, with the women at least, was largely due to its + careful selections of verse and fiction, its literary news, + and its full and piquant criticisms, with their long extracts + from new books. It was some time since he had personally + looked after this department, and the young fellow in charge + of it under him had remained with the paper. Its continued + excellence, which he could not have denied if he had wished, + seemed to leave him drained and feeble, and it was partly + from the sense of this that he declined the overtures, well + backed up with money, to establish an independent paper in + Des Vaches. He felt that there was not fight enough in him + for the work, even if he had not taken that strong disgust + for public life which included the place and its people. He + wanted to get away, to get far away, and with the abrupt and + total change in his humour he reverted to a period in his + life when journalism and politics and the ambition of + Congress were things undreamed of. + </p> + <p> + At that period he was a very young architect, with an + inclination toward the literary side of his profession, which + made it seem profitable to linger, with his Ruskin in his + hand, among the masterpieces of Italian Gothic, when perhaps + he might have been better employed in designing red-roofed + many-verandaed, consciously mullioned seaside cottages on the + New England coast. He wrote a magazine paper on the zoology + of the Lombardic pillars in Verona, very Ruskinian, very + scornful of modern motive. He visited every part of the + peninsula, but he gave the greater part of his time to North + Italy, and in Venice he met the young girl whom he followed + to Florence. His love did not prosper; when she went away she + left him in possession of that treasure to a man of his + temperament, a broken heart. From that time his vague dreams + began to lift, and to let him live in the clear light of + common day; but he was still lingering at Florence, ignorant + of the good which had befallen him, and cowering within + himself under the sting of wounded vanity, when he received a + letter from his elder brother suggesting that he should come + and see how he liked the architecture of Des Vaches. His + brother had been seven years at Des Vaches, where he had + lands, and a lead-mine, and a scheme for a railroad, and had + lately added a daily newspaper to his other enterprises. He + had, in fact, added two newspapers; for having unexpectedly + and almost involuntarily become the owner of the Des Vaches + <i>Republican</i>, the fancy of building up a great local + journal seized him, and he bought the <i>Wabash Valley + Democrat</i>, uniting them under the name of the + <i>Democrat-Republican</i>. But he had trouble almost from + the first with his editors, and he naturally thought of the + brother with a turn for writing who had been running to waste + for the last year or two in Europe. His real purpose was to + work Colville into the management of his paper when he + invited him to come out and look at the architecture of Des + Vaches. + </p> + <p> + Colville went, because he was at that moment in the humour to + go anywhere, and because his money was running low, and he + must begin work somehow. He was still romantic enough to like + the notion of the place a little, because it bore the name + given to it by the old French <i>voyageurs</i> from a herd of + buffalo cows which they had seen grazing on the site of their + camp there; but when he came to the place itself he did not + like it. He hated it; but he stayed, and as an architect was + the last thing any one wanted in Des Vaches since the jail + and court-house had been built, he became, half without his + willing it, a newspaper man. He learned in time to relish the + humorous intimacy of the life about him; and when it was + decided that he was no fool—there were doubts, growing + out of his Eastern accent and the work of his New York + tailor, at first—he found himself the object of a + pleasing popularity. In due time he bought his brother out; + he became very fond of newspaper life, its constant + excitements and its endless variety; and six weeks before he + sold his paper he would have scoffed at a prophecy of his + return to Europe for the resumption of any artistic purpose + whatever. But here he was, lounging on the Ponte Vecchio at + Florence, whither he had come with the intention of rubbing + up his former studies, and of perhaps getting back to put + them in practice at New York ultimately. He had said to + himself before coming abroad that he was in no hurry; that he + should take it very easily—he had money enough for + that; yet he would keep architecture before him as an object, + for he had lived long in a community where every one was + intensely occupied, and he unconsciously paid to Des Vaches + the tribute of feeling that an objectless life was + disgraceful to a man. + </p> + <p> + In the meantime he suffered keenly and at every moment the + loss of the occupation of which he had bereaved himself; in + thinking of quite other things, in talk of totally different + matters, from the dreams of night, he woke with a start to + the realisation of the fact that he had no longer a + newspaper. He perceived now, as never before, that for + fifteen years almost every breath of his life had been drawn + with reference to his paper, and that without it he was in + some sort lost, and, as it were, extinct. A tide of + ridiculous home-sickness, which was an expression of this + passionate regret for the life he had put behind him, rather + than any longing for Des Vaches, swept over him, and the + first passages of a letter to the + <i>Post-Democrat-Republican</i> began to shape themselves in + his mind. He had always, when he left home for New York or + Washington, or for his few weeks of summer vacation on the + Canadian rivers or the New England coast, written back to his + readers, in whom he knew he could count upon quick sympathy + in all he saw and felt, and he now found himself addressing + them with that frank familiarity which comes to the + journalist, in minor communities, from the habit of print. He + began by confessing to them the defeat of certain + expectations with which he had returned to Florence, and told + them that they must not look for anything like the ordinary + letters of travel from him. But he was not so singular in his + attitude toward the place as he supposed; for any tourist who + comes to Florence with the old-fashioned expectation of + impressions will probably suffer a disappointment, unless he + arrives very young and for the first time. It is a city + superficially so well known that it affects one somewhat like + a collection of views of itself; they are from the most + striking points, of course, but one has examined them before, + and is disposed to be critical of them. Certain emotions, + certain sensations failed to repeat themselves to Colville at + sight of the familiar monuments, which seemed to wear a hardy + and indifferent air, as if being stared at so many years by + so many thousands of travellers had extinguished in them that + sensibility which one likes to fancy in objects of interest + everywhere. + </p> + <p> + The life which was as vivid all about him as if caught by the + latest instantaneous process made the same comparatively + ineffective appeal. The operatic spectacle was still there. + The people, with their cloaks statuesquely draped over their + left shoulders, moved down the street, or posed in vehement + dialogue on the sidewalks; the drama of bargaining, with the + customer's scorn, the shopman's pathos, came through the open + shop door; the handsome, heavy-eyed ladies, the bare-headed + girls, thronged the ways; the caffès were full of the + well-remembered figures over their newspapers and little + cups; the officers were as splendid as of old, with their + long cigars in their mouths, their swords kicking against + their beautiful legs, and their spurs jingling; the dandies, + with their little dogs and their flower-like smiles, were + still in front of the confectioners' for the inspection of + the ladies who passed; the old beggar still crouched over her + scaldino at the church door, and the young man with one leg, + whom he thought to escape by walking fast, had timed him to a + second from the other side of the street. There was the + wonted warmth in the sunny squares, and the old familiar damp + and stench in the deep narrow streets. But some charm had + gone out of all this. The artisans coming to the doors of + their shallow booths for the light on some bit of + carpentering, or cobbling, or tinkering; the crowds swarming + through the middle of the streets on perfect terms with the + wine-carts and cab horses; the ineffective grandiosity of the + palaces huddled upon the crooked thoroughfares; the slight + but insinuating cold of the southern winter, gathering in the + shade and dispersing in the sun, and denied everywhere by the + profusion of fruit and flowers, and by the greenery of + gardens showing through the grated portals and over the tops + of high walls; the groups of idle poor, permanently or + temporarily propped against the bases of edifices with a + southern exposure; the priests and monks and nuns in their + gliding passage; the impassioned snapping of the cabmen's + whips; the clangour of bells that at some hours inundated the + city, and then suddenly subsided and left it to the banging + of coppersmiths; the open-air frying of cakes, with its + primitive smell of burning fat; the tramp of soldiery, and + the fanfare of bugles blown to gay measures—these and a + hundred other characteristic traits and facts still found a + response in the consciousness where they were once a rapture + of novelty; but the response was faint and thin; he could not + warm over the old mood in which he once treasured them all + away as of equal preciousness. + </p> + <p> + Of course there was a pleasure in recognising some details of + former experience in Florence as they recurred. Colville had + been met at once by a <i>festa</i>, when nothing could be + done, and he was more than consoled by the caressing sympathy + with which he was assured that his broken trunk could not be + mended till the day after to-morrow; he had quite forgotten + about the festas and the sympathy. That night the piazza on + which he lodged seemed full of snow to the casual glance he + gave it; then he saw that it was the white Italian moonlight, + which he had also forgotten.... + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p><a name="II"><!--Marker--></a> + <h2> + II + </h2> + <p> + Colville had readied this point in that sarcastic study of + his own condition of mind for the advantage of his late + readers in the <i>Post-Democrat-Republican</i>, when he was + aware of a polite rustling of draperies, with an ensuing + well-bred murmur, which at once ignored him, deprecated + intrusion upon him, and asserted a common right to the + prospect on which he had been dwelling alone. He looked round + with an instinctive expectation of style and poise, in which + he was not disappointed. The lady, with a graceful lift of + the head and a very erect carriage, almost Bernhardtesque in + the backward fling of her shoulders and the strict + compression of her elbows to her side, was pointing out the + different bridges to the little girl who was with her. + </p> + <p> + "That first one is the Santa Trinità, and the next is + the Carraja, and that one quite down by the Cascine is the + iron bridge. The Cascine you remember—the park where we + were driving—that clump of woods there——" + </p> + <p> + A vagueness expressive of divided interest had crept into the + lady's tone rather than her words. Colville could feel that + she was waiting for the right moment to turn her delicate + head, sculpturesquely defined by its toque, and steal an + imperceptible glance at him: and he involuntarily afforded + her the coveted excuse by the slight noise he made in + changing his position in order to be able to go away as soon + as he had seen whether she was pretty or not. At forty-one + the question is still important to every man with regard to + every woman. + </p> + <p> + "Mr. Colville!" + </p> + <p> + The gentle surprise conveyed in the exclamation, without time + for recognition, convinced Colville, upon a cool review of + the facts, that the lady had known him before their eyes met. + </p> + <p> + "Why, Mrs. Bowen!" he said. + </p> + <p> + She put out her round, slender arm, and gave him a frank + clasp of her gloved hand. The glove wrinkled richly up the + sleeve of her dress half-way to her elbow. She bent on his + face a demand for just what quality and degree of change he + found in hers, and apparently she satisfied herself that his + inspection was not to her disadvantage, for she smiled + brightly, and devoted the rest of her glance to an electric + summary of the facts of Colville's physiognomy; the + sufficiently good outline of his visage, with its full, + rather close-cut, drabbish-brown beard and moustache, both + shaped a little by the ironical self-conscious smile that + lurked under them; the non-committal, rather weary-looking + eyes; the brown hair, slightly frosted, that showed while he + stood with his hat still off. He was a little above the + middle height, and if it must be confessed, neither his face + nor his figure had quite preserved their youthful lines. They + were both much heavier than when Mrs. Bowen saw them last, + and the latter here and there swayed beyond the strict bounds + of symmetry. She was herself in that moment of life when, to + the middle-aged observer, at least, a woman's looks have a + charm which is wanting to her earlier bloom. By that time her + character has wrought itself more clearly out in her face, + and her heart and mind confront you more directly there. It + is the youth of her spirit which has come to the surface. + </p> + <p> + "I should have known you anywhere," she exclaimed, with + friendly pleasure in seeing him. + </p> + <p> + "You are very kind," said Colville. "I didn't know that I had + preserved my youthful beauty to that degree. But I can + imagine it—if you say so, Mrs. Bowen." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I assure you that you have!" she protested; and now she + began gently to pursue him with one fine question after + another about himself, till she had mastered the main facts + of his history since they had last met. He would not have + known so well how to possess himself of hers, even if he had + felt the same necessity; but in fact it had happened that he + had heard of her from time to time at not very long + intervals. She had married a leading lawyer of her Western + city, who in due time had gone to Congress, and after his + term was out had "taken up his residence" in Washington, as + the newspapers said, "in his elegant mansion at the corner of + & Street and Idaho Avenue." After that he remembered + reading that Mrs. Bowen was going abroad for the education of + her daughter, from which he made his own inferences + concerning her marriage. And "You knew Mr. Bowen was no + longer living?" she said, with fit obsequy of tone. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, I knew," he answered, with decent sympathy. + </p> + <p> + "This is my little Effie," said Mrs. Bowen after a moment; + and now the child, hitherto keeping herself discreetly in the + background, came forward and promptly gave her hand to + Colville, who perceived that she was not so small as he had + thought her at first; an effect of infancy had possibly been + studied in the brevity of her skirts and the immaturity of + her corsage, but both were in good taste, and really to the + advantage of her young figure. There was reason and justice + in her being dressed as she was, for she really was not so + old as she looked by two or three years; and there was reason + in Mrs. Bowen's carrying in the hollow of her left arm the + India shawl sacque she had taken off and hung there; the deep + cherry silk lining gave life to the sombre tints prevailing + in her dress, which its removal left free to express all the + grace of her extremely lady-like person. Lady-like was the + word for Mrs. Bowen throughout—for the turn of her + head, the management of her arm from the elbow, the curve of + her hand from wrist to finger-tips, the smile, subdued, but + sufficiently sweet, playing about her little mouth, which was + yet not too little, and the refined and indefinite perfume + which exhaled from the ensemble of her silks, her laces, and + her gloves, like an odorous version of that otherwise + impalpable quality which women call style. She had, with all + her flexibility, a certain charming stiffness, like the + stiffness of a very tall feather. + </p> + <p> + "And have you been here a great while?" she asked, turning + her head slowly toward Colville, and looking at him with a + little difficulty she had in raising her eyelids; when she + was younger the glance that shyly stole from under the covert + of their lashes was like a gleam of sunshine, and it was + still like a gleam of paler sunshine. + </p> + <p> + Colville, whose mood was very susceptible to the weather, + brightened in the ray. "I only arrived last night," he said, + with a smile. + </p> + <p> + "How glad you must be to get back! Did you ever see Florence + more beautiful than it was this morning?" + </p> + <p> + "Not for years," said Colville, with another smile for her + pretty enthusiasm. "Not for seventeen years at the least + calculation." + </p> + <p> + "Is it so many?" cried Mrs. Bowen, with lovely dismay. "Yes, + it is," she sighed, and she did not speak for an appreciable + interval. + </p> + <p> + He knew that she was thinking of that old love affair of his, + to which she was privy in some degree, though he never could + tell how much; and when she spoke he perceived that she + purposely avoided speaking of a certain person, whom a woman + of more tact or of less would have insisted upon naming at + once. "I never can believe in the lapse of time when I get + back to Italy; it always makes me feel as young as when I + left it last." + </p> + <p> + "I could imagine you'd never left it," said Colville. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen reflected a moment. "Is that a compliment?" + </p> + <p> + "I had an obscure intention of saying something fine; but I + don't think I've quite made it out," he owned. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen gave her small, sweet smile. "It was very nice of + you to try. But I haven't really been away for some time; + I've taken a house in Florence, and I've been here two years. + Palazzo Pinti, Lung' Arno della Zecca. You must come and see + me. Thursdays from four till six." + </p> + <p> + "Thank you," said Colville. + </p> + <p> + "I'm afraid," said Mrs. Bowen, remotely preparing to offer + her hand in adieu, "that Effie and I broke in upon some very + important cogitations of yours." She shifted the silken + burden off her arm a little, and the child stirred from the + correct pose she had been keeping, and smiled politely. + </p> + <p> + "I don't think they deserve a real dictionary word like + that," said Colville. "I was simply mooning. If there was + anything definite in my mind, I was wishing that I was + looking down on the Wabash in Dos Vaches, instead of the Arno + in Florence." + </p> + <p> + "Oh! And I supposed you must be indulging all sorts of + historical associations with the place. Effie and I have been + walking through the Via de' Bardi, where Romola lived, and I + was bringing her back over the Ponte Vecchio, so as to + impress the origin of Florence on her mind." + </p> + <p> + "Is that what makes Miss Effie hate it?" asked Colville, + looking at the child, whose youthful resemblance to her + mother was in all things so perfect that a fantastic question + whether she could ever have had any other parent swept + through him. Certainly, if Mrs. Bowen were to marry again, + there was nothing in this child's looks to suggest the idea + of a predecessor to the second husband. + </p> + <p> + "Effie doesn't hate any sort of useful knowledge," said her + mother half jestingly. "She's just come to me from school at + Vevay." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, then, I think she might," persisted Colville. "Don't you + hate the origin of Florence a little?" he asked of the child. + </p> + <p> + "I don't know enough about it," she answered, with a quick + look of question at her mother, and checking herself in a + possibly indiscreet smile. + </p> + <p> + "Ah, that accounts for it," said Colville, and he laughed. It + amused him to see the child referring even this point of + propriety to her mother, and his thoughts idled off to what + Mrs. Bowen's own untrammelled girlhood must have been in her + Western city. For her daughter there were to be no buggy + rides, or concerts, or dances at the invitation of young men; + no picnics, free and unchaperoned as the casing air; no + sitting on the steps at dusk with callers who never dreamed + of asking for her mother; no lingering at the gate with her + youthful escort home from the ball—nothing of that + wild, sweet liberty which once made American girlhood a long + rapture. But would she be any the better for her privations, + for referring not only every point of conduct, but every + thought and feeling, to her mother? He suppressed a sigh for + the inevitable change, but rejoiced that his own youth had + fallen in the earlier time, and said, "You will hate it as + soon as you've read a little of it." + </p> + <p> + "The difficulty is to read a little of Florentine history. I + can't find anything in less than ten or twelve volumes," said + Mrs. Bowen. "Effie and I were going to Viesseux's Library + again, in desperation, to see if there wasn't something + shorter in French." + </p> + <p> + She now offered Colville her hand, and he found himself very + reluctant to let it go. Something in her looks did not forbid + him, and when she took her hand away, he said, "Let me go to + Viesseux's with you, Mrs. Bowen, and give you the advantage + of my unprejudiced ignorance in the choice of a book on + Florence." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I was longing to ask you!" said Mrs. Bowen frankly. "It + is really such a serious matter, especially when the book is + for a young person. Unless it's very dry, it's so apt to + be—objectionable," + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said Colville, with a smile at her perplexity. He + moved off down the slope of the bridge with her, between the + jewellers' shops, and felt a singular satisfaction in her + company. Women of fashion always interested him; he liked + them; it diverted him that they should take themselves + seriously. Their resolution, their suffering for their ideal, + such as it was, their energy in dressing and adorning + themselves, the pains they were at to achieve the + trivialities they passed their lives in, were perpetually + delightful to him. He often found them people of great + simplicity, and sometimes of singularly good sense; their + frequent vein of piety was delicious. + </p> + <p> + Ten minutes earlier he would have said that nothing could + have been less welcome to him than this encounter, but now he + felt unwilling to leave Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + "Go before, Effie," she said; and she added, to Colville, + "How very Florentine all this is! If you dropped from the + clouds on this spot without previous warning, you would know + that you were on the Ponte Vecchio, and nowhere else." + </p> + <p> + "Yes, it's very Florentine," Colville assented. "The bridge + is very well as a bridge, but as a street I prefer the Main + Street Bridge at Des Vaches. I was looking at the jewellery + before you came up, and I don't think it's pretty, even the + old pieces of peasant jewellery. Why do people come here to + look at it? If you were going to buy something for a friend, + would you dream of coming here for it?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh <i>no</i>!" replied Mrs. Bowen, with the deepest feeling. + </p> + <p> + They quitted the bridge, and turning to the left, moved down + the street which with difficulty finds space between the + parapet of the river and the shops of the mosaicists and + dealers in statuary cramping it on the other hand. + </p> + <p> + "Here's something distinctively Florentine too," said + Colville. "These table-tops, and paper-weights, and caskets, + and photograph frames, and lockets, and breast-pins; and + here, this ghostly glare of undersized Psyches and Hebes and + Graces in alabaster." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, you mustn't think of any of them!" Mrs. Bowen broke in + with horror. "If your friend wishes you to get her something + characteristically Florentine, and at the same time very + tasteful, you must go—" + </p> + <p> + Colville gave a melancholy laugh. "My friend is an + abstraction, Mrs. Bowen, without sex or any sort of entity." + </p> + <p> + "Oh!" said Mrs. Bowen. Some fine drops had begun to sprinkle + the pavement. "What a ridiculous blunder! It's raining! + Effie, I'm afraid we must give up your book for to-day. We're + not dressed for damp weather, and we'd better hurry home as + soon as possible." She got promptly into the shelter of a + doorway, and gathered her daughter to her, while she flung + her sacque over her shoulder and caught her draperies from + the ground for the next movement. "Mr. Colville, will you + please stop the first closed carriage that comes in sight?" + </p> + <p> + A figure of <i>primo tenore</i> had witnessed the manoeuvre + from the box of his cab; he held up his whip, and at a nod + from Colville he drove abreast of the doorway, his + broken-kneed, tremulous little horse gay in brass-mounted + harness, and with a stiff turkey feather stuck upright at one + ear in his head-stall. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen had no more scruple than another woman in stopping + travel and traffic in a public street for her convenience. + She now entered into a brisk parting conversation with + Colville, such as ladies love, blocking the narrow sidewalk + with herself, her daughter, and her open carriage door, and + making people walk round her cab, in the road, which they did + meekly enough, with the Florentine submissiveness to the + pretensions of any sort of vehicle. She said a dozen + important things that seemed to have just come into her head, + and, "Why, how stupid I am!" she called out, making Colville + check the driver in his first start, after she had got into + the cab. "We are to have a few people tonight. If you have no + engagement, I should be so glad to have you come. Can't you?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes, I can," said Colville, admiring the whole transaction + and the parties to it with a passive smile. + </p> + <p> + After finding her pocket, she found that her card-case was + not in it, but in the purse she had given Effie to carry; but + she got her address at last, and gave it to Colville, though + he said he should remember it without. "Any time between nine + and eleven," she said. "It's so nice of you to promise!" + </p> + <p> + She questioned him from under her half-lifted eyelids, and he + added, with a laugh, "I'll come!" and was rewarded with two + pretty smiles, just alike, from mother and daughter, as they + drove away. + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p><a name="III"><!--Marker--></a> + <h2> + III + </h2> + <p> + Twenty years earlier, when Mrs. Bowen was Miss Lina Ridgely, + she used to be the friend and confidante of the girl who + jilted Colville. They were then both so young that they could + scarcely have been a year out of school before they left home + for the year they were spending in Europe; but to the young + man's inexperience they seemed the wisest and maturest of + society women. His heart quaked in his breast when he saw + them talking and laughing together, for fear they should be + talking and laughing about him; he was even a little more + afraid of Miss Ridgely than of her friend, who was dashing + and effective, where Miss Ridgely was serene and elegant, + according to his feeling at that time; but he never saw her + after his rejection, and it was not till he read of her + marriage with the Hon. Mr. Bowen that certain vague + impressions began to define themselves. He then remembered + that Lina Ridgely in many fine little ways had shown a + kindness, almost a compassion, for him, as for one whose + unconsciousness a hopeless doom impended over. He perceived + that she had always seemed to like him—a thing that had + not occurred to him in the stupid absorption of his passion + for the other—and fragments of proof that she had + probably defended and advocated him occurred to him, and + inspired a vain and retrospective gratitude; he abandoned + himself to regrets, which were proper enough in regard to + Miss Ridgely, but were certainly a little unlawful concerning + Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + As he walked away toward his hotel he amused himself with the + conjecture whether he, with his forty-one years and his + hundred and eighty five pounds, were not still a pathetic and + even a romantic figure to this pretty and kindly woman, who + probably imagined him as heart-broken as ever. He was very + willing to see more of her, if she wished; but with the rain + beginning to fall more thick and chill in the darkening + street, he could have postponed their next meeting till a + pleasanter evening without great self-denial. He felt a + little twinge of rheumatism in his shoulder when he got into + his room, for your room in a Florentine hotel is always some + degrees colder than outdoors, unless you have fire in it; and + with the sun shining on his windows when he went out after + lunch, it had seemed to Colville ridiculous to have his + morning fire kept up. The sun was what he had taken the room + for. It was in it, the landlord assured him, from ten in the + morning till four in the afternoon; and so, in fact, it was, + when it shone; but even then it was not fully in it, but had + a trick of looking in at the sides of the window, and + painting the chamber wall with a delusive glow. Colville + raked away the ashes of his fire-place, and throwing on two + or three fagots of broom and pine sprays, he had a blaze that + would be very pretty to dress by after dinner, but that gave + out no warmth for the present. He left it, and went down to + the reading-room, as it was labelled over the door, in homage + to a predominance of English-speaking people among the + guests; but there was no fire there; that was kindled only by + request, and he shivered at the bare aspect of the apartment, + with its cold piano, its locked bookcases, and its table, + where the London <i>Times</i>, the <i>Neue Freie Presse</i> + of Vienna, and the <i>Italie</i> of Rome exposed their + titles, one just beyond the margin of the other. He turned + from the door and went into the dining-room, where the stove + was ostentatiously roaring over its small logs and its + lozenges of peat, But even here the fire had been so recently + lighted that the warmth was potential rather than actual. By + stooping down before the stove, and pressing his shoulder + against its brass doors, Colville managed to lull his enemy, + while he studied the figures of the woman-headed, + woman-breasted hounds developing into vines and foliage that + covered the frescoed trellising of the quadrangularly vaulted + ceiling. The waiters, in their veteran dress-coats, were + putting the final touches to the table, and the sound of + voices outside the door obliged Colville to get up. The + effort involved made him still more reluctant about going out + to Mrs. Bowen's. + </p> + <p> + The door opened, and some English ladies entered, faintly + acknowledging, provisionally ignoring, his presence, and + talking of what they had been doing since lunch. They agreed + that it was really too cold in the churches for any pleasure + in the pictures, and that the Pitti Gallery, where they had + those braziers, was the only place you could go with comfort. + A French lady and her husband came in; a Russian lady + followed; an Italian gentleman, an American family, and three + or four detached men of the English-speaking race, whose + language at once became the law of the table. + </p> + <p> + As the dinner progressed from soup to fish, and from the + <i>entrée</i> to the roast and salad, the combined + effect of the pleasant cheer and the increasing earnestness + of the stove made the room warmer and warmer. They drank + Chianti wine from the wicker-covered flasks, tied with tufts + of red and green silk, in which they serve table wine at + Florence, and said how pretty the bottles were, but how the + wine did not seem very good. + </p> + <p> + "It certainly isn't so good as it used to be," said Colville. + </p> + <p> + "Ah, then you have been in Florhence before." said the French + lady, whose English proved to be much better than the French + that he began to talk to her in. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, a great while ago; in a state of pre-existence, in + fact," he said. + </p> + <p> + The lady looked a little puzzled, but interested. "In a state + of prhe-existence?" she repeated. + </p> + <p> + "Yes; when I was young," he added, catching the gleam in her + eye. "When I was twenty-four. A great while ago." + </p> + <p> + "You must be an Amerhican," said the lady, with a laugh. + </p> + <p> + "Why do you think so? From my accent?" + </p> + <p> + "Frhom your metaphysics too. The Amerhicans like to talk in + that way." + </p> + <p> + "I didn't know it," said Colville. + </p> + <p> + "They like to strhike the key of personality; they can't + endure not being interhested. They must rhelate everything to + themselves or to those with whom they are talking." + </p> + <p> + "And the French, no?" asked Colville. + </p> + <p> + The lady laughed again. "There is a large Amerhican colony in + Parhis. Perhaps we have learned to be like you." + </p> + <p> + The lady's husband did not speak English, and it was probably + what they had been saying that she interpreted to him, for he + smiled, looking forward to catch Colville's eye in a friendly + way, and as if he would not have him take his wife's talk too + seriously. + </p> + <p> + The Italian gentleman on Colville's right was politely + offering him the salad, which had been left for the guests to + pass to one another. Colville thanked him in Italian, and + they began to talk of Italian affairs. One thing led to + another, and he found that his new friend, who was not yet + his acquaintance, was a member of Parliament, and a + republican. + </p> + <p> + "That interests me as an American," said Colville. "But why + do you want a republic in Italy?" + </p> + <p> + "When we have a constitutional king, why should we have a + king?" asked the Italian. + </p> + <p> + An Englishman across the table relieved Colville from the + difficulty of answering this question by asking him another + that formed talk about it between them. He made his tacit + observation that the English, since he met them last, seemed + to have grown in the grace of facile speech with strangers; + it was the American family which kept its talk within itself, + and hushed to a tone so low that no one else could hear it. + Colville did not like their mumbling; for the honour of the + country, which we all have at heart, however little we think + it, he would have preferred that they should speak up, and + not seem afraid or ashamed; he thought the English manner was + better. In fact, he found himself in an unexpectedly social + mood; he joined in helping to break the ice; he laughed and + hazarded comment with those who were new-comers like himself, + and was very respectful of the opinions of people who had + been longer in the hotel, when they spoke of the cook's habit + of underdoing the vegetables. The dinner at the Hotel d'Atene + made an imposing show on the <i>carte du jour</i>; it looked + like ten or twelve courses, but in fact it was five, and even + when eked out with roast chestnuts and butter into six, it + seemed somehow to stop very abruptly, though one seemed to + have had enough. You could have coffee afterward if you + ordered it. Colville ordered it, and was sorry when the last + of his commensals, slightly bowing him a good-night, left him + alone to it. + </p> + <p> + He had decided that he need not fear the damp in a cab + rapidly driven to Mrs. Bowen's. When he went to his room he + had his doubts about his dress-coat; but he put it on, and he + took the crush hat with which he had provided himself in + coming through London. That was a part of the social panoply + unknown in Des Vaches; he had hardly been a dozen times in + evening dress there in fifteen years, and his suit was as new + as his hat. As he turned to the glass he thought himself + personable enough, and in fact he was one of those men who + look better in evening dress than in any other: the broad + expanse of shirt bosom, with its three small studs of gold + dropping, points of light, one below the other, softened his + strong, almost harsh face, and balanced his rather large + head. In his morning coat, people had to look twice at him to + make sure that he did not look common; but now he was not + wrong in thinking that he had an air of distinction, as he + took his hat under his arm and stood before the pier-glass in + his room. He was almost tempted to shave, and wear his + moustache alone, as he used to do: he had let his beard grow + because he found that under the lax social regimen at Des + Vaches he neglected shaving, and went about days at a time + with his face in an offensive stubble. Taking his chin + between his fingers, and peering closer into the mirror, he + wondered how Mrs. Bowen should have known him; she must have + remembered him very vividly. He would like to take off his + beard and put on the youthfulness that comes of shaving, and + see what she would say. Perhaps, he thought, with a last + glance at his toilet, he was overdoing it, if she were only + to have a few people, as she promised. He put a thick + neckerchief over his chest so as not to provoke that + abominable rheumatism by any sort of exposure, and he put on + his ulster instead of the light spring overcoat that he had + gone about with all day. + </p> + <p> + He found that Palazzo Pinti, when you came to it, was rather + a grand affair, with a gold-banded porter eating salad in the + lodge at the great doorway, and a handsome gate of iron + cutting you off from the regions above till you had rung the + bell of Mrs. Bowen's apartment, when it swung open of itself, + and you mounted. At her door a man in modified livery + received Colville, and helped him off with his overcoat so + skilfully that he did not hurt his rheumatic shoulder at all; + there were half a dozen other hats and coats on the carved + chests that stood at intervals along the wall, and some gayer + wraps that exhaled a faint, fascinating fragrance on the + chilly air. Colville experienced the slight exhilaration, the + mingled reluctance and eagerness, of a man who formally + re-enters an assemblage of society after long absence from + it, and rubbing his hands a little nervously together, he put + aside the yellow Abruzzi blanket <i>portière</i>, and + let himself into the brilliant interior. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen stood in front of the fire in a brown silk of + subdued splendour, and with her hands and fan and + handkerchief tastefully composed before her. At sight of + Colville she gave a slight start, which would have betrayed + to him, if he had been another woman, that she had not really + believed he would come, and came forward with a rustle and + murmur of pleasure to meet him; he had politely made a rush + upon her, so as to spare her this exertion, and he was + tempted to a long-forgotten foppishness of attitude as he + stood talking with her during the brief interval before she + introduced him to any of the company. She had been honest + with him; there were not more than twenty-five or thirty + people there; but if he had overdone it in dressing for so + small an affair, he was not alone, and he was not sorry. He + was sensible of a better personal effect than the men in + frock-coats and cut-aways were making, and he perceived with + self-satisfaction that his evening dress was of better style + than that of the others who wore it; at least no one else + carried a crush hat.— + </p> + <p> + At forty-one a man is still very much of a boy, and Colville + was obscurely willing that Mrs. Bowen, whose life since they + last met at an evening party had been passed chiefly at New + York and Washington, should see that he was a man of the + world in spite of Des Vaches. Before she had decided which of + the company she should first present him to, her daughter + came up to his elbow with a cup of tea and some bread and + butter on a tray, and gave him good-evening with charming + correctness of manner. "Really," he said, turning about to + take the cup, "I thought it was you, Mrs. Bowen, who had got + round to my side with a sash on. How do you and Miss Effie + justify yourselves in looking so bewitchingly alike?" + </p> + <p> + "You notice it, then?" Mrs. Bowen seemed delighted. + </p> + <p> + "I did every moment you were together to-day. You don't mind + my having been so personal in my observations?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, not at all," said Mrs. Bowen, and Colville laughed. + </p> + <p> + "It must be true," he said, "what a French lady said to me at + the <i>table-d'hôte</i> dinner to-night: 'the + Amerhicans always strhike the note of perhsonality.'" He + neatly imitated the French lady's guttural accent. + </p> + <p> + "I suppose we do," mused Mis. Bowen, "and that we don't mind + it in each other. I wish <i>you</i> would say which I shall + introduce you to," she said, letting her glance stray + invisibly over her company, where all the people seemed + comfortably talking. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, there's no hurry; put it off till to-morrow," said + Colville. + </p> + <p> + "Oh no; that won't do," said Mrs. Bowen, like a woman who has + public duties to perform, and is resolute to sacrifice her + private pleasure to them. But she postponed them a moment + longer. "I hope you got home before the rain," she said. + </p> + <p> + "Yes," returned Colville. "That is, I don't mind a little + sprinkling. Who is the Junonian young person at the end of + the room?" + </p> + <p> + "Ah," said Mrs. Bowen, "you can't be introduced to <i>her</i> + first. But <i>isn't</i> she lovely?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes. It's a wonderful effect of white and gold." + </p> + <p> + "You mustn't say that to her. She was doubtful about her + dress, because she says that the ivory white with her hair + makes her look just like white and gold furniture." + </p> + <p> + "Present me at once, then, before I forget not to say it to + her." + </p> + <p> + "No; I must keep you for some other person: anybody can talk + to a pretty girl." + </p> + <p> + Colville said he did not know whether to smile or shed tears + at this embittered compliment, and pretended an eagerness for + the acquaintance denied him. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen seemed disposed to intensify his misery. "Did you + ever see a more statuesque creature—with those superb + broad shoulders and that little head, and that thick braid + brought round over the top? Doesn't her face, with that calm + look in those starry eyes, and that peculiar fall of the + corners of the mouth, remind you of some of those exquisite + great Du Maurier women? That style of face is very + fashionable now: you might think he had made it so." + </p> + <p> + "Is there a fashion in faces?" asked Colville. + </p> + <p> + "Why, certainly. You must know that." + </p> + <p> + "Then why aren't all the ladies in the fashion?" + </p> + <p> + "It isn't one that can be put on. Besides, every one hasn't + got Imogene Graham's figure to carry it off." + </p> + <p> + "That's her name, then—Imogene Graham. It's a very + pretty name." + </p> + <p> + "Yes. She's staying with me for the winter. Now that's all I + can allow you to know for the present. Come! You must!" + </p> + <p> + "But this is worse than nothing." He made a feint of + protesting as she led him away, and named him to the lady she + wished him to know. But he was not really sorry; he had his + modest misgivings whether he were equal to quite so much + young lady as Miss Graham seemed. When he no longer looked at + her he had a whimsical impression of her being a heroic + statue of herself. + </p> + <p> + The lady whom Mrs. Bowen left him with had not much to say, + and she made haste to introduce her husband, who had a great + deal to say. He was an Italian, but master of that very + efficient English which the Italians get together with + unimaginable sufferings from our orthography, and Colville + repeated the republican deputy's saying about a + constitutional king, which he had begun to think was neat. + </p> + <p> + "I might prefer a republic myself," said the Italian, "but I + think that gentleman is wrong to be a republican where he is, + and for the present. The monarchy is the condition of our + unity; nothing else could hold us together, and we must + remain united if we are to exist as a nation. It's a + necessity, like our army of half a million men. We may not + like it in itself, but we know that it is our salvation." He + began to speak of the economic state of Italy, of the immense + cost of freedom and independence to a people whose political + genius enables them to bear quietly burdens of taxation that + no other government would venture to impose. He spoke with + that fond, that appealing patriotism, which expresses so much + to the sympathetic foreigner in Italy: the sense of great and + painful uncertainty of Italy's future through the + complications of diplomacy, the memory of her sufferings in + the past, the spirit of quiet and inexhaustible patience for + trials to come. This resolution, which is almost resignation, + poetises the attitude of the whole people; it made Colville + feel as if he had done nothing and borne nothing yet. + </p> + <p> + "I am ashamed," he said, not without a remote resentment of + the unworthiness of the republican voters of Des Vaches, + "when I hear of such things, to think of what we are at home, + with all our resources and opportunities." + </p> + <p> + The Italian would have politely excused us to him, but + Colville would have no palliation of our political and moral + nakedness; and he framed a continuation of the letter he + began on the Ponte Vecchio to the + <i>Post-Democrat-Republican</i>, in which he made a bitterly + ironical comparison of the achievements of Italy and America + in the last ten years. + </p> + <p> + He forgot about Miss Graham, and had only a vague sense of + her splendour as he caught sight of her in the long mirror + which she stood before. She was talking to a very handsome + young clergyman, and smiling upon him. The company seemed to + be mostly Americans, but there were a good many evident + English also, and Colville was dimly aware of a question in + his mind whether this clergyman was English or American. + There were three or four Italians and there were some + Germans, who spoke English. + </p> + <p> + Colville moved about from group to group as his enlarging + acquaintance led, and found himself more interested in + society than he could ever have dreamed of being again. It + was certainly a defect of the life at Des Vaches that people, + after the dancing and love-making period, went out rarely or + never. He began to see that the time he had spent so busily + in that enterprising city had certainly been in some sense + wasted. + </p> + <p> + At a certain moment in the evening, which perhaps marked its + advancement, the tea-urn was replaced by a jug of the rum + punch, mild or strong according to the custom of the house, + which is served at most Florentine receptions. Some of the + people went immediately after, but the young clergyman + remained talking with Miss Graham. + </p> + <p> + Colville, with his smoking glass in his hand, found himself + at the side of a friendly old gentleman who had refused the + punch. They joined in talk by a common impulse, and the old + gentleman said, directly, "You are an American, I presume?" + </p> + <p> + His accent had already established the fact of his own + nationality, but he seemed to think it the part of candour to + say, when Colville had acknowledged his origin, "I'm an + American myself." + </p> + <p> + "I've met several of our countrymen since I arrived," + suggested Colville. + </p> + <p> + The old gentleman seemed to like this way of putting it. + "Well, yes, we're not unfairly represented here in numbers, I + must confess. But I'm bound to say that I don't find our + countrymen so aggressive, so loud, as our international + novelists would make out. I haven't met any of their peculiar + heroines as yet, sir." + </p> + <p> + Colville could not help laughing. "I wish <i>I</i> had. But + perhaps they avoid people of our years and discretion, or + else take such a filial attitude toward us that we can't + recognise them." + </p> + <p> + "Perhaps, perhaps," cried the old gentleman, with cheerful + assent. + </p> + <p> + "I was talking with one of our German friends here just now, + and he complained that the American girls—especially + the rich ones—seem very calculating and worldly and + conventional. I told him I didn't know how to account for + that. I tried to give him some notion of the ennobling + influences of society in Newport, as I've had glimpses of + it." + </p> + <p> + The old gentleman caressed his elbows, which he was holding + in the palms of his hands, in high enjoyment of Colville's + sarcasm. "Ah! very good! very good!" he said. "I quite agree + with you, and I think the other sort are altogether + preferable." + </p> + <p> + "I think," continued Colville, dropping his ironical tone, + "that we've much less to regret in their unsuspecting, + unsophisticated freedom than in the type of hard materialism + which we produce in young girls, perfectly wide awake, + disenchanted, unromantic, who prefer the worldly vanities and + advantages deliberately and on principle, recognising + something better merely to despise it. I've sometimes seen + them——" + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen came up in her gentle, inquiring way. "I'm glad + that you and Mr. Colville have made acquaintance," she said + to the old gentleman. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, but we haven't," said Colville. "We're entire + strangers." + </p> + <p> + "Then I'll introduce you to Rev. Mr. Waters. And take you + away," she added, putting her hand through Colville's arm + with a delicate touch that flattered his whole being, "for + your time's come at last, and I'm going to present you to + Miss Graham." + </p> + <p> + "I don't know," he said. "Of course, as there is a Miss + Graham, I can't help being presented to her, but I had almost + worked myself up to the point of wishing there were none. I + believe I'm afraid." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I don't believe that at all. A simple schoolgirl like + that!" Mrs. Bowen's sense of humour had not the national + acuteness. She liked joking in men, but she did not know how + to say funny things back "You'll see, as you come up to her." + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p><a name="IV"><!--Marker--></a> + <h2> + IV + </h2><br> + <br> + + <p> + Miss Graham did, indeed, somehow diminish in the nearer + perspective. She ceased to be overwhelming. When Colville + lifted his eyes from bowing before her he perceived that + she—was neither so very tall nor so very large, but + possessed merely a generous amplitude of womanhood. But she + was even more beautiful, with a sweet and youthful radiance + of look that was very winning. If she had ceased to be the + goddess she looked across the length of the <i>salon</i>, she + had gained much by becoming an extremely lovely young girl; + and her teeth, when she spoke, showed a fascinating little + irregularity that gave her the last charm. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen glided away with the young clergyman, but Effie + remained at Miss Graham's side, and seemed to have hold of + the left hand which the girl let hang carelessly behind her + in the volume of her robe. The child's face expressed an + adoration of Miss Graham far beyond her allegiance to her + mother. + </p> + <p> + "I began to doubt whether Mrs. Bowen was going to bring you + at all," she said frankly, with an innocent, nervous laugh, + which made favour for her with Colville. "She promised it + early in the evening." + </p> + <p> + "She has used me much worse, Miss Graham," said Colville. + "She has kept me waiting from the beginning of time. So that + I have grown grey on my way up to you," he added, by an + inspiration. "I was a comparatively young man when Mrs. Bowen + first told me she was going to introduce me." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, how <i>good</i>!" said Miss Graham joyously. And her + companion, after a moment's hesitation, permitted herself a + polite little titter. She had made a discovery; she had + discovered that Mr. Colville was droll. + </p> + <p> + "I'm very glad you like it," he said, with a gravity that did + not deceive them. + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes," sighed Miss Graham, with generous ardour. "Who but + an American could say just such things? There's the loveliest + old lady here in Florence, who's lived here thirty years, and + she's always going back and never getting back, and she's so + homesick she doesn't know what to do, and she always says + that Americans may not be <i>better</i> than other people, + but they are <i>different</i>." + </p> + <p> + "That's very pretty. They're different in everything but + thinking themselves better. Their native modesty prevents + that." + </p> + <p> + "I don't exactly know what you mean," said Miss Graham, after + a little hesitation. + </p> + <p> + "Well," returned Colville, "I haven't thought it out very + clearly myself yet. I may mean that the Americans differ from + other people in not thinking well of themselves, or they may + differ from them in not thinking well enough. But what I said + had a very epigrammatic sound, and I prefer not to + investigate it too closely." + </p> + <p> + This made Miss Graham and Miss Effie both cry out "Oh!" in + delighted doubt of his intention. They both insensibly + drifted a little nearer to him. + </p> + <p> + "There was a French lady said to me at the + <i>table-d'hote</i> this evening that she knew I was an + American, because the Americans always strike the key of + personality." He practised these economies of material in + conversation quite recklessly, and often made the same + incident or suggestion do duty round a whole company. + </p> + <p> + "Ah, I don't believe that," said Miss Graham. + </p> + <p> + "Believe what?" + </p> + <p> + "That the Americans always talk about themselves." + </p> + <p> + "I'm not sure she meant that. You never can tell what a + person means by what he says—or <i>she</i>." + </p> + <p> + "How shocking!". + </p> + <p> + "Perhaps the French lady meant that we always talk about + other people. That's in the key of personality too." + </p> + <p> + "But I don't believe we do," said Miss Graham. "At any rate, + <i>she</i> was talking about <i>us</i>, then." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, she accounted for that by saying there was a large + American colony in Paris, who had corrupted the French, and + taught them our pernicious habit of introspection." + </p> + <p> + "Do you think we're very introspective?" + </p> + <p> + "Do you?" + </p> + <p> + "I know I'm not. I hardly ever think about myself at all. At + any rate, not till it's too late. That's the great trouble. I + wish I could. But I'm always studying other people. They're + so much more interesting." + </p> + <p> + "Perhaps if you knew yourself better you wouldn't think so," + suggested Colville. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, I know they are. I don't think any young person can be + interesting." + </p> + <p> + "Then what becomes of all the novels? They're full of young + persons." + </p> + <p> + "They're ridiculous. If I were going to write a novel, I + should take an old person for a hero—thirty-five or + forty." She looked at Colville, and blushing a little, + hastened to add, "I don't believe that they begin to be + interesting much before that time. Such flat things as young + men are always saying! Don't you remember that passage + somewhere in Heine's <i>Pictures of Travel</i>, where he sees + the hand of a lady coming out from under her mantle, when + she's confessing in a church, and he knows that it's the hand + of a young person who has enjoyed nothing and suffered + nothing, it's so smooth and flower-like? After I read that I + hated the look of my hands—I was only sixteen, and it + seemed as if I had had no more experience than a child. Oh, I + like people to go <i>through</i> something. Don't you?" + </p> + <p> + "Well, yes, I suppose I do. Other people." + </p> + <p> + "No; but don't you like it for yourself?" + </p> + <p> + "I can't tell; I haven't been through anything worth speaking + of yet." + </p> + <p> + Miss Graham looked at him dubiously, but pursued with ardour: + "Why, just getting back to Florence, after not having been + here for so long—I should think it would be so + romantic. Oh dear! I wish I were here for the second time." + </p> + <p> + "I'm afraid you wouldn't like it so well," said Colville. "I + wish I were here for the first time. There's nothing like the + first time in everything." + </p> + <p> + "Do you really think so?" + </p> + <p> + "Well, there's nothing like the first time in Florence." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I can't imagine it. I should think that recalling the + old emotions would be perfectly fascinating." + </p> + <p> + "Yes, if they'd come when you do call them. But they're as + contrary-minded as spirits from the vasty deep. I've been + shouting around here for my old emotions all day, and I + haven't had a responsive squeak." + </p> + <p> + "Oh!" cried Miss Graham, staring full-eyed at him. "How + delightful!" Effie Bowen turned away her pretty little head + and laughed, as if it might not be quite kind to laugh at a + person's joke to his face. + </p> + <p> + Stimulated by their appreciation, Colville went on with more + nonsense. "No; the only way to get at your old emotions in + regard to Florence is to borrow them from somebody who's + having them fresh. What do <i>you</i> think about Florence, + Miss Graham?" + </p> + <p> + "I? I've been here two months." + </p> + <p> + "Then it's too late?" + </p> + <p> + "No, I don't know that it is. I keep feeling the strangeness + all the time. But I can't tell you. It's very different from + Buffalo, I can assure you." + </p> + <p> + "Buffalo? I can imagine the difference. And it's not + altogether to the disadvantage of Buffalo." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, have you been there?" asked Miss Graham, with a touching + little eagerness. "Do you know anybody in Buffalo?" + </p> + <p> + "Some of the newspaper men; and I pass through there once a + year on my way to New York—or used to. It's a lively + place." + </p> + <p> + "Yes, it is," sighed Miss Graham fondly. + </p> + <p> + "Do the girls of Buffalo still come out at night and dance by + the light of the moon?" + </p> + <p> + "What!" + </p> + <p> + "Ah, I see," said Colville, peering at her under his + thoughtfully knitted brows, "you do belong to another era. + You don't remember the old negro minstrel song." + </p> + <p> + "No," said Miss Graham. "I can only remember the end of the + war." + </p> + <p> + "How divinely young!" said Colville. "Well," he added, "I + wish that French lady could have overheard us, Miss Graham. I + think she would have changed her mind about Americans + striking the note of personality in their talk." + </p> + <p> + "Oh!" exclaimed the girl reproachfully, after a moment of + swift reflection and recognition, "I don't see how you could + let me do it! You don't suppose that I should have talked so + with every one? It was because you were another American, and + such an old friend of Mrs. Bowen's." + </p> + <p> + "That is what I shall certainly tell the French lady if she + attacks me about it," said Colville. He glanced carelessly + toward the end of the room, and saw the young clergyman + taking leave of Mrs. Bowen; all the rest of the company were + gone. "Bless me!" he said, "I must be going." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen had so swiftly advanced upon him that she caught + the last words. "Why?" she asked. + </p> + <p> + "Because it's to-morrow, I suspect, and the invitation was + for one day only." + </p> + <p> + "It was a season ticket," said Mrs. Bowen, with gay + hospitality, "and it isn't to-morrow for half an hour yet. I + can't think of letting you go. Come up to the fire, all, and + let's sit down by it. It's at its very best." + </p> + <p> + Effie looked a pretty surprise and a pleasure in this girlish + burst from her mother, whose habitual serenity made it more + striking in contrast, and she forsook Miss Graham's hand and + ran forward and disposed the easy-chairs comfortably about + the hearth. + </p> + <p> + Colville and Mrs. Bowen suddenly found themselves upon those + terms which often succeed a long separation with people who + have felt kindly toward each other at a former meeting and + have parted friends: they were much more intimate than they + had supposed themselves to be, or had really any reason for + being. + </p> + <p> + "Which one of your guests do you wish me to offer up, Mrs. + Bowen?" he asked, from the hollow of the arm-chair, not too + low, which he had sunk into. With Mrs. Bowen in a higher + chair at his right hand, and Miss Graham intent upon him from + the sofa on his left, a sense of delicious satisfaction + filled him from head to foot. "There isn't one I would spare + if you said the word." + </p> + <p> + "And there isn't one I want destroyed, I'm sorry to say," + answered Mrs. Bowen. "Don't you think they were all very + agreeable?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes, yes; agreeable enough—agreeable enough, I + suppose. But they stayed too long. When I think we might have + been sitting here for the last half-hour, if they'd only gone + sooner, I find it pretty hard to forgive them." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen and Miss Graham exchanged glances above his + head—a glance which demanded, "Didn't I tell you?" for + a glance that answered, "Oh, he <i>is</i>!" Effie Bowen's + eyes widened; she kept them fastened upon Colville in silent + worship. + </p> + <p> + He asked who were certain of the company that he had noticed, + and Mrs. Bowen let him make a little fun of them: the fun was + very good-natured. He repeated what the German had said about + the worldly ambition of American girls; but she would not + allow him so great latitude in this. She said they were no + worldlier than other girls. Of course, they were fond of + society, and some of them got a little spoiled. But they were + in no danger of becoming too conventional. + </p> + <p> + Colville did not insist. "I missed the military to-night, + Mrs. Bowen," he said. "I thought one couldn't get through an + evening in Florence without officers?" + </p> + <p> + "We have them when there is dancing," returned Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, but they don't know anything but dancing," Miss Graham + broke in. "I like some one who can talk something besides + compliments." + </p> + <p> + "You are very peculiar, you know, Imogene," urged Mrs. Bowen + gently. "I don't think our young men at home do much better + in conversation, if you come to that, though." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, <i>young</i> men, yes! They're the same everywhere. But + here, even when they're away along in the thirties, they + think that girls can only enjoy flattery. <i>I</i> should + like a gentleman to talk to me without a single word or look + to show that he thought I was good-looking." + </p> + <p> + "Ah, how could he he?" Colville insinuated, and the young + girl coloured. + </p> + <p> + "I mean, if I were pretty. This everlasting adulation is + insulting." + </p> + <p> + "Mr. Morton doesn't flatter," said Mrs. Bowen thoughtfully, + turning the feather screen she held at her face, now + edgewise, now flatwise, toward Colville. + </p> + <p> + "Oh no," owned Miss Graham. "He's a clergyman." + </p> + <p> + Mrs Bowen addressed herself to Colville. "You must go to hear + him some day. He's very interesting, if you don't mind his + being rather Low Church." + </p> + <p> + Colville was going to pretend to an advanced degree of + ritualism; but it occurred to him that it might be a serious + matter to Mrs. Bowen, and he asked instead who was the Rev. + Mr. Waters. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, isn't he lovely?" cried Miss Graham. "There, Mrs. Bowen! + Mr. Waters's manner is what I call <i>truly</i> + complimentary. He always talks to you as if he expected you + to be interested in serious matters, and as if you were his + intellectual equal. And he's so <i>happy</i> here in + Florence! He gives you the impression of feeling every breath + he breathes here a privilege. You ought to hear him talk + about Savonarola, Mr. Colville." + </p> + <p> + "Well," said Colville, "I've heard a great many people talk + about Savonarola, and I'm rather glad he talked to me about + American girls." + </p> + <p> + "American girls!" uttered Miss Graham, in a little scream. + "Did Mr. Waters talk to you about <i>girls</i>?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes. Why not? He was probably in love with one once." + </p> + <p> + "Mr. Waters?" cried the girl. "What nonsense!" + </p> + <p> + "Well, then, with some old lady. Would you like that better?" + </p> + <p> + Miss Graham looked at Mrs. Bowen for permission, as it + seemed, and then laughed, but did not attempt any reply to + Colville. + </p> + <p> + "You find even that incredible of such pyramidal antiquity," + he resumed. "Well, it <i>is</i> hard to believe. I told him + what that German said, and we agreed beautifully about + another type of American girl which we said we preferred." + </p> + <p> + "Oh! What could it be?" demanded Miss Graham. + </p> + <p> + "Ah, it wouldn't be so easy to say right off-hand," answered + Colville indolently. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen put her hand under the elbow of the arm holding + her screen. "I don't believe I should agree with you so + well," she said, apparently with a sort of didactic + intention. + </p> + <p> + They entered into a discussion which is always fruitful with + Americans—the discussion of American girlhood, and + Colville contended for the old national ideal of girlish + liberty as wide as the continent, as fast as the Mississippi. + Mrs. Bowen withstood him with delicate firmness. "Oh," he + said, "you're Europeanised." + </p> + <p> + "I certainly prefer the European plan of bringing up girls," + she replied steadfastly. "I shouldn't think of letting a + daughter of mine have the freedom I had." + </p> + <p> + "Well, perhaps it will come right in the next generation, + then; she will let her daughter have the freedom she hadn't." + </p> + <p> + "Not if I'm alive to prevent it," cried Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + Colville laughed. "Which plan do you prefer, Miss Graham?" + </p> + <p> + "I don't think it's quite the same now as it used to be," + answered the girl evasively. + </p> + <p> + "Well, then, all I can say is that if I had died before this + chance, I had lived a blessed time. I perceive more and more + that I'm obsolete. I'm in my dotage; I prattle of the good + old times, and the new spirit of the age flouts me. Miss + Effie, do you prefer the Amer——" + </p> + <p> + "No, thank you," said her mother quickly. + </p> + <p> + "Effie is out of the question. It's time you were in bed, + Effie." + </p> + <p> + The child came with instant submissiveness and kissed her + mother good-night; she kissed Miss Graham, and gave her hand + to Colville. He held it a moment, letting her pull shyly away + from him, while he lolled back in his chair, and laughed at + her with his sad eyes. "It's past the time <i>I</i> should be + in bed, my dear, and I'm sitting up merely because there's + nobody to send me. It's not that I'm really such a very bad + boy. Good night. Don't put me into a disagreeable dream; put + me into a nice one." The child bridled at the mild + pleasantry, and when Colville released her hand she suddenly + stooped forward and kissed him. + </p> + <p> + "You're so <i>funny</i>!" she cried, and ran and escaped + beyond the <i>portière</i>. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen stared in the same direction, but not with + severity. "Really, Effie has been carried a little beyond + herself." + </p> + <p> + "Well," said Colville, "that's <i>one</i> conquest since I + came to Florence. And merely by being funny! When I was in + Florence before, Mrs. used to go about quite freely with + either of them. They were both very pretty, and we were all + very young. Don't you think it was charming?" Mrs. Bowen + coloured a lovely red, and smiled, but made no other + response. "Florence has changed very much for the worse since + that time. There used to be a pretty flower-girl, with a + wide-flapping straw hat, who flung a heavy bough full of + roses into my lap when she met me driving across the Carraja + bridge. I spent an hour looking for that girl to-day, and + couldn't find her. The only flower-girl I could find was a + fat one of fifty, who kept me fifteen minutes in Via + Tornabuoni while she was fumbling away at my button-hole, + trying to poke three second-hand violets and a sickly daisy + into it. Ah, youth! youth! I suppose a young fellow could + have found that other flower-girl at a glance; but <i>my</i> + old eyes! No, we belong, each of us, to our own generation. + Mrs. Bowen," he said, with a touch of tragedy—whether + real or affected, he did not well know himself—in his + hardiness, "what has become of Mrs. Pilsbury?" + </p> + <p> + "Mrs. Milbury, you mean?" gasped Mrs. Bowen, in affright at + his boldness. + </p> + <p> + "Milbury, Bilbury, Pilsbury—it's all one, so long as it + isn't——" + </p> + <p> + "They're living in Chicago!" she hastened to reply, as if she + were afraid he was going to say, "so long as it isn't + Colville," and she could not have borne that. + </p> + <p> + Colville clasped his hands at the back of his head and looked + at Mrs. Bowen with eyes that let her know that he was + perfectly aware she had been telling Miss Graham of his + youthful romance, and that he had now touched it purposely. + "And you wouldn't," he said, as if that were quite relevant + to what they had been talking about—"you wouldn't let + Miss Graham go out walking alone with a dotard like me?" + </p> + <p> + "Certainly not," said Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + Colville got to his feet by a surprising activity. "Good-bye, + Miss Graham." He offered his hand to her with burlesque + despair, and then turned to Mrs. Bowen. "Thank you for + <i>such</i> a pleasant evening! What was your day, did you + say?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, any day!" said Mrs. Bowen cordially, giving her hand. + </p> + <p> + "Do you know whom you look like?" he asked, holding it. + </p> + <p> + "No." + </p> + <p> + "Lina Ridgely." + </p> + <p> + The ladies stirred softly in their draperies after he was + gone. They turned and faced the hearth, where a log burned in + a bed of hot ashes, softly purring and ticking to itself, and + whilst they stood pressing their hands against the warm + fronts of their dresses, as the fashion of women is before a + fire, the clock on the mantel began to strike twelve. + </p> + <p> + "Was that her name?" asked Miss Graham, when the clock had + had its say. "Lina Ridgely?" + </p> + <p> + "No; that was <i>my</i> name," answered Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes!" murmured the young girl apologetically. + </p> + <p> + "She led him on; she certainly encouraged him. It was + shocking. He was quite wild about it." + </p> + <p> + "She must have been a cruel girl. How <i>could</i> he speak + of it so lightly?" + </p> + <p> + "It was best to speak of it, and have done with it," said + Mrs. Bowen. "He knew that I must have been telling you + something about it." + </p> + <p> + "Yes. How bold it was! A <i>young</i> man couldn't have done + it! Yes, he's fascinating. But how old and sad he looked, as + he lay back there in the chair!" + </p> + <p> + "Old? I don't think he looked old. He looked sad. Yes, it's + left its mark on him." + </p> + <p> + The log burned quite through to its core, and fell asunder, a + bristling mass of embers. They had been looking at it with + downcast heads. Now they lifted their faces, and saw the pity + in each other's eyes, and the beautiful girl impulsively + kissed the pretty woman good-night. + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p><a name="V"><!--Marker--></a> + <h2> + V + </h2> + <p> + Colville fell asleep with the flattered sense which abounds + in the heart of a young man after his first successful + evening in society, but which can visit maturer life only + upon some such conditions of long exile and return as had + been realised in his. The looks of these two charming women + followed him into his dreams; he knew he must have pleased + them, the dramatic homage of the child was evidence of that; + and though it had been many years since he had found it + sufficient cause of happiness to have pleased a woman, the + desire to do so was by no means extinct in him. The eyes of + the girl hovered above him like stars; he felt in their soft + gaze that he was a romance to her young heart, and this made + him laugh; it also made him sigh. + </p> + <p> + He woke at dawn with a sharp twinge in his shoulder, and he + rose to give himself the pleasure of making his own fire with + those fagots of broom and pine twigs which he had enjoyed the + night before, promising himself to get back into bed when the + fire was well going, and sleep late. While he stood before + the open stove, the jangling of a small bell outside called + him to the window, and he saw a procession which had just + issued from the church going to administer the extreme + unction to some dying person across the piazza. The parish + priest went first, bearing the consecrated wafer in its + vessel, and at his side an acolyte holding a yellow silk + umbrella over the Eucharist; after them came a number of + <i>facchini</i> in white robes and white hoods that hid their + faces; their tapers burned sallow and lifeless in the new + morning light; the bell jangled dismally. + </p> + <p> + "They even die dramatically in this country," thought + Colville, in whom the artist was taken with the effectiveness + of the spectacle before his human pity was stirred for the + poor soul who was passing. He reproached himself for that, + and instead of getting back to bed, he dressed and waited for + the mature hour which he had ordered his breakfast for. When + it came at last, picturesquely borne on the open hand of + Giovanni, steaming coffee, hot milk, sweet butter in delicate + disks, and two white eggs coyly tucked in the fold of a + napkin, and all grouped upon the wide salver, it brought him + a measure of the consolation which good cheer imparts to the + ridiculous human heart even in the house where death is. But + the sad incident tempered his mind with a sort of pensiveness + that lasted throughout the morning, and quite till lunch. He + spent the time in going about the churches; but the sunshine + which the day began with was overcast, as it was the day + before, and the churches were rather too dark and cold in the + afternoon. He went to Viesseux's reading-room and looked over + the English papers, which he did not care for much; and he + also made a diligent search of the catalogue for some book + about Florence for little Effie Bowen: he thought he would + like to surprise her mother with his interest in the matter. + As the day waned toward dark, he felt more and more tempted + to take her at her word, when she had said that any day was + her day to him, and go to see her. If he had been a younger + man he would have anxiously considered this indulgence and + denied himself, but after forty a man denies himself no + reasonable and harmless indulgence; he has learned by that + time that it is a pity and a folly to do so. + </p> + <p> + Colville found Mrs. Bowen's room half full of arriving and + departing visitors, and then he remembered that it was this + day she had named to him on the Ponte Vecchio, and when Miss + Graham thanked him for coming his first Thursday, he made a + merit of not having forgotten it, and said he was going to + come every Thursday during the winter. Miss Graham drew him a + cup of tea from the Russian samovar which replaces in some + Florentine houses the tea-pot of Occidental civilisation, and + Colville smiled upon it and upon her, bending over the brazen + urn with a flower-like tilt of her beautiful head. She wore + an aesthetic dress of creamy camel's-hair, whose colour + pleased the eye as its softness would have flattered the + touch. + </p> + <p> + "What a very Tourguéneffish effect the samovar gives!" + he said, taking a biscuit from the basket Effie Bowen brought + him, shrinking with redoubled shyness from the eyebrows which + he arched at her. "I wonder you can keep from calling me + Fedor Colvillitch. Where is your mother, Effie Bowenovna?" he + asked of the child, with a temptation to say Imogene + Grahamovna. + </p> + <p> + They both looked mystified, but Miss Graham said, "I'm sorry + to say you won't see Mrs. Bowen today. She has a very bad + headache, and has left Effie and me to receive. We feel very + incompetent, but she says it will do us good." + </p> + <p> + There were some people there of the night before, and + Colville had to talk to them. One of the ladies asked him if + he had met the Inglehart boys as he came in. + </p> + <p> + "The Inglehart boys? No. What are the Inglehart boys?" + </p> + <p> + "They were here all last winter, and they've just got back. + It's rather exciting for Florence." She gave him a rapid + sketch of that interesting exodus of a score of young + painters from the art school at Munich, under the head of the + singular and fascinating genius by whose name they became + known. "They had their own school for a while in Munich, and + then they all came down into Italy in a body. They had their + studio things with them, and they travelled third class, and + they made the greatest excitement everywhere, and had the + greatest fun. They were a great sensation in Florence. They + went everywhere, and were such favourites. I hope they are + going to stay." + </p> + <p> + "I hope so too," said Colville. "I should like to see them." + </p> + <p> + "Dear me!" said the lady, with a glance at the clock. "It's + five! I must be going." + </p> + <p> + The other ladies went, and Colville approached to take leave, + but Miss Graham detained him. + </p> + <p> + "What is Tourguéneffish?" she demanded. + </p> + <p> + "The quality of the great Russian novelist, + Tourguéneff," said Colville, perceiving that she had + not heard of him. + </p> + <p> + "Oh!" + </p> + <p> + "You ought to read him. The samovar sends up its agreeable + odour all through his books. Read <i>Lisa</i> if you want + your heart really broken. + </p> + <p> + "I'm glad you approve of heart-breaks in books. So many + people won't read anything but cheerful books. It's the only + quarrel I have with Mrs. Bowen. She says there are so many + sad things in life that they ought to be kept out of books." + </p> + <p> + "Ah, there I perceive a divided duty," said Colville. "I + should like to agree with both of you. But if Mrs. Bowen were + here I should remind her that if there are so many sad things + in life that is a very good reason for putting them in books + too." + </p> + <p> + "Of course I shall tell her what you said." + </p> + <p> + "Why, I don't object to a certain degree of cheerfulness in + books; only don't carry it too far—that's all." + </p> + <p> + This made the young girl laugh, and Colville was encouraged + to go on. He told her of the sight he had seen from his + window at daybreak, and he depicted it all very graphically, + and made her feel its pathos perhaps more keenly than he had + felt it. "Now, that little incident kept with me all day, + tempering my boisterous joy in the Giottos, and reducing me + to a decent composure in the presence of the Cimabues; and + it's pretty hard to keep from laughing at some of them, don't + you think?" + </p> + <p> + The young people perceived that he was making fun again; but + he continued with an air of greater seriousness. "Don't you + see what a very good thing that was to begin one's day with? + Why, even in Santa Croce, with the thermometer ten degrees + below zero in the shade of Alfieri's monument, I was no gayer + than I should have been in a church at home. I suppose Mrs. + Bowen would object to having that procession go by under + one's window in a book; but I can't really see how it would + hurt the reader, or damp his spirits permanently. A wholesome + reaction would ensue, such as you see now in me, whom the + thing happened to in real life." + </p> + <p> + He stirred his tea, and shook with an inward laugh as he + carried it to his lips. + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said Miss Graham thoughtfully, and she looked at him + searchingly in the interval of silence that ensued. But she + only added, "I wish it would get warmer in the churches. I've + seen hardly anything of them yet." + </p> + <p> + "From the way I felt in them to-day," sighed Colville, "I + should think the churches would begin to thaw out about the + middle of May. But if one goes well wrapped up in furs, and + has a friend along to rouse him and keep him walking when he + is about to fall into that lethargy which precedes death by + freezing, I think they may be visited even now with safety. + Have you been in Santa Maria Novella yet?" + </p> + <p> + "No," said Miss Graham, with a shake of the head that + expressed her resolution to speak the whole truth if she died + for it, "not even in Santa Maria Novella." + </p> + <p> + "What a wonderful old place it is! That curious + façade, with the dials and its layers of black and + white marble soaked golden-red in a hundred thousand sunsets! + That exquisite grand portal!" He gesticulated with the hand + that the tea-cup left free, to suggest form and measurement + as artists do. "Then the inside! The great Cimabue, with all + that famous history on its back—the first divine + Madonna by the first divine master, carried through the + streets in a triumph of art and religion! Those frescoes of + Ghirlandajo's with real Florentine faces and figures in them, + and all lavished upon the eternal twilight of that + choir—but I suppose that if the full day were let in on + them, once, they would vanish like ghosts at cock-crow! You + must be sure to see the Spanish chapel; and the old cloister + itself is such a pathetic place. There's a boys' school, as + well as a military college, in the suppressed convent now, + and the colonnades were full of boys running and screaming + and laughing and making a joyful racket; it was so much more + sorrowful than silence would have been there. One of the + little scamps came up to me, and the young monk that was + showing me round, and bobbed us a mocking bow and bobbed his + hat off; then they all burst out laughing again and raced + away, and the monk looked after them and said, so sweetly and + wearily, 'They're at their diversions: we must have + patience.' There are only twelve monks left there; all the + rest are scattered and gone." He gave his cup to Miss Graham + for more tea. + </p> + <p> + "Don't you think," she asked, drawing it from the samovar, + "that it is very sad having the convents suppressed?" + </p> + <p> + "It was very sad having slavery abolished—for some + people," suggested Colville; he felt the unfairness of the + point he had made. + </p> + <p> + "Yes," sighed Miss Graham. + </p> + <p> + Colville stood stirring his second cup of tea, when the + <i>portière</i> parted, and showed Mrs. Bowen + wistfully pausing on the threshold. Her face was pale, but + she looked extremely pretty there. + </p> + <p> + "Ah, come in, Mrs. Bowen!" he called gaily to her. "I won't + give you away to the other people. A cup of tea will do you + good." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I'm a great deal better," said Mrs. Bowen, coming + forward to give him her hand. "I heard your voice, and I + couldn't resist looking in." + </p> + <p> + "That was very kind of you," said Colville gratefully: and + her eyes met his in a glance that flushed her face a deep + red. "You find me here—<i>I</i> don't know + why!—in my character of old family friend, doing my + best to make life a burden to the young ladies." + </p> + <p> + "I wish you would stay to a family dinner with us," said Mrs. + Bowen, and Miss Graham brightened in cordial support of the + hospitality. "Why can't you?" + </p> + <p> + "I don't know, unless it's because I'm a humane person, and + have some consideration for your headache." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, that's all gone," said Mrs. Bowen. "It was one of those + convenient headaches—if you ever had them, you'd + know—that go off at sunset." + </p> + <p> + "But you'd have another to-morrow." + </p> + <p> + "No, I'm safe for a whole fortnight from another." + </p> + <p> + "Then you leave me without an excuse, and I was just wishing + I had none," said Colville. + </p> + <p> + After dinner Mrs. Bowen sent Effie to bed early to make up + for the late hours of the night before, but she sat before + the fire with Miss Graham rather late, talking Colville over, + when he was gone. + </p> + <p> + "He's very puzzling to me," said Miss Graham. "Sometimes you + think he's nothing but an old cynic, from his talk, and then + something so sweet and fresh comes out that you don't know + what to do. Don't you think he has really a very poetical + mind, and that he's putting all the rest on?" + </p> + <p> + "I think he likes to make little effects," said Mrs. Bowen + judiciously. "He always did, rather." + </p> + <p> + "Why, was he like this when he was young?" + </p> + <p> + "I don't consider him very old now." + </p> + <p> + "No, of course not. I meant when you knew him before." Miss + Graham had some needlework in her hand; Mrs. Bowen, who never + even pretended to work at that kind of thing, had nothing in + hers but the feather screen. + </p> + <p> + "He is old, compared with you, Imogene; but you'll find, as + you live along, that your contemporaries are always young. + Mr. Colville is very much improved. He used to be painfully + shy, but he put on a bold front, and now the bold front seems + to have become a second nature with him." + </p> + <p> + "I like it," said Miss Graham, to her needle. + </p> + <p> + "Yes; but I suspect he's still shy, at heart. He used to be + very sentimental, and was always talking Ruskin. I think if + he hadn't talked Ruskin so much, Jenny Milbury might have + treated him better. It was very priggish in him." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I can't imagine Mr. Colville's being priggish!" + </p> + <p> + "He's very much improved. He used to be quite a sloven in his + dress; you know how very slovenly most American gentlemen are + in their dress, at any rate. I think that influenced her + against him too." + </p> + <p> + "He isn't slovenly now," suggested Miss Graham. + </p> + <p> + "Oh no; he's quite swell," said Mrs. Bowen, depriving the + adjective of slanginess by the refinement of her tone. + </p> + <p> + "Well," said Miss Graham, "I don't see how you could have + endured her after that. It was atrocious." + </p> + <p> + "It was better for her to break with him, if she found out + she didn't love him, than to marry him. That," said Mrs. + Bowen, with a depth of feeling uncommon for her, "would have + been a thousand times worse." + </p> + <p> + "Yes, but she ought to have found out before she led him on + so far." + </p> + <p> + "Sometimes girls can't. They don't know themselves; they + think they're in love when they're not. She was very + impulsive, and of course she was flattered by it; he was so + intellectual. But at last she found that she couldn't bear + it, and she had to tell him so." + </p> + <p> + "Did she ever say why she didn't love him?" + </p> + <p> + "No; I don't suppose she could. The only thing I remember her + saying was that he was 'too much of a mixture.'" + </p> + <p> + "What <i>did</i> she mean by that?" + </p> + <p> + "I don't know exactly." + </p> + <p> + "Do you think he's insincere?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh no. Perhaps she meant that he wasn't single-minded." + </p> + <p> + "Fickle?" + </p> + <p> + "No. He certainly wasn't that in her case." + </p> + <p> + "Undecided?" + </p> + <p> + "He was decided enough with her—at last." + </p> + <p> + Imogene dropped the hopeless quest, "How can a man ever stand + such a thing?" she sighed. + </p> + <p> + "He stood it very nobly. That was the best thing about it; he + took it in the most delicate way. She showed me his letter. + There wasn't a word or a hint of reproach in it; he seemed to + be anxious about nothing but her feeling badly for him. Of + course he couldn't help showing that he was mortified for + having pursued her with attentions that were disagreeable to + her; but that was delicate too. Yes, it was a very + large-minded letter," + </p> + <p> + "It was shocking in her to show it." + </p> + <p> + "It wasn't very nice. But it was a letter that any girl might + have been proud to show." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, she <i>couldn't</i> have done it to gratify her vanity!" + </p> + <p> + "Girls are very queer, my dear," said Mrs. Bowen, as if the + fact were an abstraction. She mused upon the flat of her + screen, while Miss Graham plied her needle in silence. + </p> + <p> + The latter spoke first. "Do you think he was very much broken + by it?" + </p> + <p> + "You never can tell. He went out west then, and there he has + stayed ever since. I suppose his life would have been very + different if nothing of the kind had happened. He had a great + deal of talent. I always thought I should hear of him in some + way." + </p> + <p> + "Well, it was a heartless, shameless thing! I don't see how + you can speak of it so leniently as you do, Mrs. Bowen. It + makes all sorts of coquetry and flirtation more detestable to + me than ever. Why, it has ruined his life!" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, he was young enough then to outlive it. After all, they + were a boy and girl." + </p> + <p> + "A boy and girl! How old were they?" + </p> + <p> + "He must have been twenty-three or four, and she was twenty." + </p> + <p> + "My age! Do you call that being a girl?" + </p> + <p> + "She was old enough to know what she was about," said Mrs. + Bowen justly. + </p> + <p> + Imogene fell back in her chair, drawing out her needle the + full length of its thread, and then letting her hand fall. "I + don't know. It seems as if I never should be grown up, or + anything but a child. Yes, when I think of the way young men + talk, they do seem boys. Why can't they talk like Mr. + Colville? I wish I could talk like him. It makes you forget + how old and plain he is." + </p> + <p> + She remained with her eyelids dropped in an absent survey of + her sewing, while Mrs. Bowen regarded her with a look of + vexation, impatience, resentment, on the last refinement of + these emotions, which she banished from her face before Miss + Graham looked up and said, with a smile "How funny it is to + see Effie's infatuation with him! She can't take her eyes off + him for a moment, and she follows him round the room so as + not to lose a word he is saying. It was heroic of her to go + to bed without a murmur before he left to-night." + </p> + <p> + "Yes, she sees that he is good," said Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, she sees that he's something very much more. Mr. Waters + is good." + </p> + <p> + Miss Graham had the best of the argument, and so Mrs. Bowen + did not reply. + </p> + <p> + "I feel," continued the young girl, "as if it were almost a + shame to have asked him to go to that silly dancing party + with us. It seems as if we didn't appreciate him. I think we + ought to have kept him for high aesthetic occasions and + historical researches." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I don't think Mr. Colville was very deeply offended at + being asked to go with us." + </p> + <p> + "No," said Imogene, with another sigh, "he didn't seem so. I + suppose there's always an undercurrent of sadness—of + tragedy—in everything for him." + </p> + <p> + "I don't suppose anything of the kind," cried Mrs. Bowen + gaily. "He's had time enough to get over it." + </p> + <p> + "Do people <i>ever</i> get over such things?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes—men." + </p> + <p> + "It must be because he was young, as you say. But if it had + happened <i>now</i>?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, it <i>couldn't</i> happen now. He's altogether too cool + and calculating." + </p> + <p> + "Do you think he's cool and calculating?" + </p> + <p> + "No. He's too old for a broken heart—a new one." + </p> + <p> + "Mrs. Bowen," demanded the girl solemnly, "could <i>you</i> + forgive yourself for such a thing if you had done it?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes, perfectly well, if I wasn't in love with him." + </p> + <p> + "But if you'd made him <i>think</i> you were?" pursued the + girl breathlessly. + </p> + <p> + "If I were a flirt—yes." + </p> + <p> + "<i>I</i> couldn't," said Imogene, with tragic depth. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, be done with your intensities, and go to bed, Imogene," + said Mrs. Bowen, giving her a playful push. + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p><a name="VI"><!--Marker--></a> + <h2> + VI + </h2><br> + <br> + + <p> + It was so long since Colville had been at a dancing party + that Mrs. Bowen's offer to take him to Madame Uccelli's had + first struck his sense of the ludicrous. Then it had begun to + flatter him; it implied that he was still young enough to + dance if he would, though he had stipulated that they were + not to expect anything of the kind from him. He liked also + the notion of being seen and accepted in Florentine society + as the old friend of Mrs. Bowen's, for he had not been long + in discovering that her position in Florence was, among the + foreign residents, rather authoritative. She was one of the + very few Americans who were asked to Italian houses, and + Italian houses lying even beyond the neutral ground of + English-speaking intermarriages. She was not, of course, + asked to the great Princess Strozzi ball, where the + Florentine nobility appeared in the mediaeval pomp—the + veritable costumes—of their ancestors; only a rich + American banking family went, and their distinction was + spoken of under the breath; but any glory short of this was + within Mrs. Bowen's reach. So an old lady who possessed + herself of Colville the night before had told him, + celebrating Mrs. Bowen at length, and boasting of her + acceptance among the best English residents, who, next after + the natives, seem to constitute the social ambition of + Americans living in Italian cities. + </p> + <p> + It interested him to find that some geographical distinctions + which are fading at home had quite disappeared in Florence. + When he was there before, people from quite small towns in + the East had made pretty Lina Ridgely and her friend feel the + disadvantage of having come from the Western side of an + imaginary line; he had himself been at the pains always to + let people know, at the American watering-places where he + spent his vacations, that though presently from Des Vaches, + Indiana, he was really born in Rhode Island; but in Florence + it was not at all necessary. He found in Mrs. Bowen's house + people from Denver, Chicago, St. Louis, Boston, New York, and + Baltimore, all meeting as of apparently the same + civilisation, and whether Mrs. Bowen's own origin was, like + that of the Etruscan cities, lost in the mists of antiquity, + or whether she had sufficiently atoned for the error of her + birth by subsequent residence in the national capital and + prolonged sojourn in New York, it seemed certainly not to be + remembered against her among her Eastern acquaintance. The + time had been when the fact that Miss Graham came from + Buffalo would have gone far to class her with the animal from + which her native city had taken its name; but now it made no + difference, unless it was a difference in her favour. The + English spoke with the same vague respect of Buffalo and of + Philadelphia; and to a family of real Bostonians Colville had + the courage to say simply that he lived in Des Vaches, and + not to seek to palliate the truth in any sort. If he wished + to prevaricate at all, it was rather to attribute himself to + Mrs. Bowen's city in Ohio. + </p> + <p> + She and Miss Graham called for him with her carriage the next + night, when it was time to go to Madame Uccelli's. + </p> + <p> + "This gives me a very patronised and effeminate feeling," + said Colville, getting into the odorous dark of the carriage, + and settling himself upon the front seat with a skill + inspired by his anxiety not to tear any of the silken + spreading white wraps that inundated the whole interior. + "Being come for by ladies!" They both gave some nervous + joyful laughs, as they found his hand in the obscurity, and + left the sense of a gloved pressure upon it. "Is this the way + you used to do in Vesprucius, Mrs. Bowen?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh no, indeed!" she answered. "The young gentlemen used to + find out whether I was going, and came for me with a hack, + and generally, if the weather was good, we walked home." + </p> + <p> + "That's the way we still do in Des Vaches. Sometimes, as a + tremendous joke, the ladies come for us in leap-year. How do + you go to balls in Buffalo, Miss Graham? Or, no; I withdraw + the embarrassing question." Some gleams from the street + lamps, as they drove along, struck in through the carriage + windows, and flitted over the ladies' faces and were gone + again. "Ah! this is very trying. Couldn't you stop him at the + next corner, and let me see how radiant you ladies really + are? I may be in very great danger; I'd like to know just how + much." + </p> + <p> + "It wouldn't be of any use," cried the young girl gaily. + "We're all wrapped up, and you couldn't form any idea of us. + You must wait, and let us burst upon you when we come out of + the dressing-room at Madame Uccelli's." + </p> + <p> + "But then it may be too late," he urged. "Is it very far?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said Mrs. Bowen. "It's ridiculously far. It's outside + the Roman Gate. I don't see why people live at that + distance." + </p> + <p> + "In order to give the friends you bring the more pleasure of + your company, Mrs. Bowen." + </p> + <p> + "Ah! that's very well. But you're not logical." + </p> + <p> + "No," said Colville; "you can't be logical and complimentary + at the same time. It's too much to ask. How delicious your + flowers are!" The ladies each had a bouquet in her hand, + which she was holding in addition to her fan, the edges of + her cloak, and the skirt of her train. + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said Mrs. Bowen; "we are so much obliged to you for + them." + </p> + <p> + "Why, I sent you <i>no flowers</i>," said Colville, startled + into untimely earnest. + </p> + <p> + "Didn't you?" triumphed Mrs. Bowen. "I thought gentlemen + always sent flowers to ladies when they were going to a ball + with them. They used to, in Columbus." + </p> + <p> + "And in Buffalo they always do," Miss Graham added. + </p> + <p> + "Ah! they don't in Des Vaches," said Colville. They tried to + mystify him further about the bouquets; they succeeded in + being very gay, and in making themselves laugh a great deal. + Mrs. Bowen was even livelier than the young girl. + </p> + <p> + Her carriage was one of the few private equipages that drove + up to Madame Uccelli's door; most people had not even come in + a <i>remise</i>, but, after the simple Florentine fashion, + had taken the little cabs, which stretched in a long line up + and down the way; the horses had let their weary heads drop, + and were easing their broken knees by extending their + forelegs while they drowsed; the drivers, huddled in their + great-coats, had assembled around the doorway to see the + guests alight, with that amiable, unenvious interest of the + Italians in the pleasure of others. The deep sky glittered + with stars; in the corner of the next villa garden the black + plumes of some cypresses blotted out their space among them. + </p> + <p> + "<i>Isn't</i> it Florentine?" demanded Mrs. Bowen, giving the + hand which Colville offered in helping her out of the + carriage a little vivid pressure, full of reminiscence and + confident sympathy. A flush of youth warmed his heart; he did + not quail even when the porter of the villa intervened + between her and her coachman, whom she was telling when to + come back, and said that the carriages were ordered for three + o'clock. + </p> + <p> + "Did you ever sit up so late as that in Des Vaches?" asked + Miss Graham mischievously. + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes; I was editor of a morning paper," he explained. But + he did not like the imputation of her question. + </p> + <p> + Madame Uccelli accepted him most hospitably among her guests + when he was presented. She was an American who had returned + with her Italian husband to Italy, and had long survived him + in the villa which he had built with her money. Such people + grow very queer with the lapse of time. Madame Uccelli's + character remained inalienably American, but her manners and + customs had become largely Italian; without having learned + the language thoroughly, she spoke it very fluently, and its + idioms marked her Philadelphia English. Her house was a + menagerie of all the nationalities; she was liked in Italian + society, and there were many Italians; English-speaking + Russians abounded; there were many genuine English, Germans, + Scandinavians, Protestant Irish, American Catholics, and then + Americans of all kinds. There was a superstition of her + exclusiveness among her compatriots, but one really met every + one there sooner or later; she was supposed to be a convert + to the religion of her late husband, but no one really knew + what religion she was of, probably not even Madame Uccelli + herself. One thing you were sure of at her house, and that + was a substantial supper; it is the example of such resident + foreigners which has corrupted the Florentines, though many + native families still hold out against it. + </p> + <p> + The dancing was just beginning, and the daughter of Madame + Uccelli, who spoke both English and Italian much better than + her mother, came forward and possessed herself of Miss + Graham, after a polite feint of pressing Mrs. Bowen to let + her find a partner for her. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen cooed a gracious refusal, telling Fanny Uccelli + that she knew very well that she never danced now. The girl + had not much time for Colville; she welcomed him, but she was + full of her business of starting the dance, and she hurried + away without asking him whether she should introduce him to + some lady for the quadrille that was forming. Her mother, + however, asked him if he would not go out and get himself + some tea, and she found a lady to go with him to the + supper-room. This lady had daughters whom apparently she + wished to supervise while they were dancing, and she brought + Colville back very soon. He had to stand by the sofa where + she sat till Madame Uccelli found him and introduced him to + another mother of daughters. Later he joined a group formed + by the father of one of the dancers and the non-dancing + husband of a dancing wife. Their conversation was + perfunctory; they showed one another that they had no + pleasure in it. + </p> + <p> + Presently the father went to see how his daughter looked + while dancing; the husband had evidently no such curiosity + concerning his wife; and Colville went with the father, and + looked at Miss Graham. She was very beautiful, and she obeyed + the music as if it were her breath; her face was rapt, + intense, full of an unsmiling delight, which shone in her + dark eyes, glowing like low stars. Her <i>abandon</i> + interested Colville, and then awed him; the spectacle of that + young, unjaded capacity for pleasure touched him with a + profound sense of loss. Suddenly Imogene caught sight of him, + and with the coming of a second look in her eyes the light of + an exquisite smile flashed over her face. His heart was in + his throat. + </p> + <p> + "<i>Your</i> daughter?" asked the fond parent at his elbow. + "That is mine yonder in red." + </p> + <p> + Colville did not answer, nor look at the young lady in red. + The dance was ceasing; the fragments of those kaleidoscopic + radiations were dispersing themselves; the tormented piano + was silent. + </p> + <p> + The officer whom Imogene had danced with brought her to Mrs. + Bowen, and resigned her with the regulation bow, hanging his + head down before him as if submitting his neck to the axe. + She put her hand in Colville's arm, where he stood beside + Mrs. Bowen. "Oh, <i>do</i> take me to get something to eat!" + </p> + <p> + In the supper-room she devoured salad and ices with a + childish joy in them. The place was jammed, and she laughed + from her corner at Colville's struggles in getting the things + for her and bringing them to her. While she was still in the + midst of an ice, the faint note of the piano sounded. "Oh, + they're beginning again. It's the Lancers!" she said, giving + him the plate back. She took his arm again; she almost pulled + him along on their return. + </p> + <p> + "Why don't <i>you</i> dance?" she demanded mockingly. + </p> + <p> + "I would if you'd let me dance with you." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, that's impossible! I'm engaged ever so many deep." She + dropped his arm instantly at sight of a young Englishman who + seemed to be looking for her. This young Englishman had a + zeal for dancing that was unsparing; partners were nothing to + him except as a means of dancing; his manner expressed a + supreme contempt for people who made the slightest mistake, + who danced with less science or less conscience than himself. + "I've been looking for you," he said, in a tone of cold + rebuke, without looking at her. "We've been waiting." + </p> + <p> + Colville wished to beat him, but Imogene took his rebuke + meekly, and murmured some apologies about not hearing the + piano before. He hurried her off without recognising + Colville's existence in any way. + </p> + <p> + The undancing husband of the dancing wife was boring himself + in a corner; Colville decided that the chances with him were + better than with the fond father, and joined him, just as a + polite officer came up and entreated him to complete a set. + "Oh, I never danced in my life," he replied; and then he + referred the officer to Colville. "Don't <i>you</i> dance?" + </p> + <p> + "I used to dance," Colville began, while the officer stood + looking patiently at him. This was true. He used to dance the + Lancers, too, and very badly, seventeen years before. He had + danced it with Lina Ridgely and the other one, Mrs. Milbury. + His glance wandered to the vacant place on the floor; it was + the same set which Miss Graham was in; she smiled and + beckoned derisively. A vain and foolish ambition fired him. + "Oh yes, I can dance a little," he said. + </p> + <p> + A little was quite enough for the eager officer. He had + Colville a partner in an instant, and the next he was on the + floor. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, what fun!" cried Miss Graham; but the fun had not really + begun yet. + </p> + <p> + Colville had forgotten everything about the Lancers. He + walked round like a bear in a pen: he capered to and fro with + a futile absurdity; people poked him hither and thither; his + progress was attended by rending noises from the trains over + which he found his path. He smiled and cringed, and + apologised to the hardening faces of the dancers: even Miss + Graham's face had become very grave. + </p> + <p> + "This won't do," said the Englishman at last, with cold + insolence. He did not address himself to any one; he merely + stopped; they all stopped, and Colville was effectively + expelled the set? another partner was found for his lady, and + he wandered giddily away. He did not know where to turn; the + whole room must have seen what an incredible ass he had made + of himself, but Mrs. Bowen looked as if she had not seen. + </p> + <p> + He went up to her, resolved to make fun of himself at the + first sign she gave of being privy to his disgrace. But she + only said, "Have you found your way to the supper-room yet?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes; twice," he answered, and kept on talking with her + and Madame Uccelli. After five minutes or so something + occurred to Colville. "Have <i>you</i> found the way to the + supper-room yet, Mrs. Bowen?" + </p> + <p> + "No!" she owned, with a small, pathetic laugh, which + expressed a certain physical faintness, and reproached him + with insupportable gentleness for his selfish obtuseness. + </p> + <p> + "Let me show you the way," he cried. + </p> + <p> + "Why, I <i>am</i> rather hungry," said Mrs. Bowen, taking his + arm, with a patient arrangement first of her fan, her + bouquet, and her train, and then moving along by his side + with a delicate footed pace, which insinuated and deprecated + her dependence upon him. + </p> + <p> + There were only a few people in the supper-room, and they had + it practically to themselves. She took a cup of tea and a + slice of buttered bread, with a little salad, which she + excused herself from eating because it was the day after her + headache. "I shouldn't have thought you <i>were</i> hungry, + Mrs. Bowen," he said, "if you hadn't told me so," and he + recalled that, as a young girl, her friend used to laugh at + her for having such a butterfly appetite; she was in fact one + of those women who go through life the marvels of such of our + brutal sex as observe the ethereal nature of their diet. But + in an illogical revulsion of feeling. Colville, who was again + cramming himself with all the solids and fluids in reach, and + storing up a vain regret against the morrow, preferred her + delicacy to the magnificent rapacity of Miss Graham: Imogene + had passed from salad to ice, and at his suggestion had + frankly reverted to salad again and then taken a second ice, + with the robust appetite of perfect health and perfect youth. + He felt a desire to speak against her to Mrs. Bowen, he did + not know why and he did not know how; he veiled his feeling + in an open attack. "Miss Graham has just been the cause of my + playing the fool, with her dancing. She dances so superbly + that she makes you want to dance too—she made me feel + as if I <i>could</i> dance." + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said Mrs. Bowen; "it was very kind of you to complete + the set. I saw you dancing," she added, without a glimmer of + guilty consciousness in her eyes. + </p> + <p> + It was very sweet, but Colville had to protest. "Oh no; you + didn't see me <i>dancing</i>; you saw me <i>not dancing</i>. + I am a ruined man, and I leave Florence to-morrow; but I have + the sad satisfaction of reflecting that I don't leave an + unbroken train among the ladies of that set. And I have made + one young Englishman so mad that there is a reasonable hope + of his not recovering." + </p> + <p> + "Oh no; you <i>don't</i> think of going away for that!" said + Mrs. Bowen, not heeding the rest of his joking. + </p> + <p> + "Well, the time has been when I have left Florence for loss," + said Colville, with the air of preparing himself to listen to + reason. + </p> + <p> + "You mustn't," said Mrs. Bowen briefly. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, very well, then, I won't," said Colville whimsically, as + if that settled it. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen would not talk of the matter any more; he could + see that with her kindness, which was always more than her + tact, she was striving to get away from the subject. As he + really cared for it no longer, this made him persist in + clinging to it; he liked this pretty woman's being kind to + him. "Well," he said finally, "I consent to stay in Florence + on condition that you suggest some means of atonement for me + which I can also make a punishment to Miss Graham." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen did not respond to the question of placating and + punishing her <i>protégée</i> with sustained + interest. They went back to Madame Uccelli, and to the other + elderly ladies in the room that opened by archways upon the + dancing-room. + </p> + <p> + Imogene was on the floor, dancing not merely with unabated + joy, but with a zest that seemed only to freshen from dance + to dance. If she left the dance, it was to go out on her + partner's arm to the supper-room. Colville could not decently + keep on talking to Mrs. Bowen the whole evening; it would be + too conspicuous; he devolved from frump to frump; he bored + himself; he yawned in his passage from one of these mothers + or fathers to another. The hours passed; it was two o'clock; + Imogene was going out to the supper-room again. He was taking + out his watch. She saw him, and "Oh, don't!" she cried, + laughing, as she passed. + </p> + <p> + The dancing went on; she was waltzing now in the interminable + german. Some one had let down, a window in the dancing-room, + and he was feeling it in his shoulder. Mrs. Bowen, across the + room, looked heroically patient, but weary. He glanced, down + at the frump on the sofa near, and realised that she had been + making a long speech to him, which, he could see from her + look, had ended in some sort of question. + </p> + <p> + Three o'clock came, and they had to wait till the german was + over. He felt that Miss Graham was behaving badly, + ungratefully, selfishly; on the way home in the carriage he + was silent from utter boredom and fatigue, but Mrs. Bowen was + sweetly sympathetic with the girl's rapture. Imogene did not + seem to feel his moodiness; she laughed, she joked, she told + a number of things that happened, she hummed the air of the + last waltz. "Isn't it divine?" she asked. "Oh! I feel as if I + could dance for a week." She was still dancing; she gave + Colville's foot an accidental tap in keeping time on the + floor of the carriage to the tune she was humming. No one + said anything about a next meeting when they parted at the + gate of Palazzo Pinti, and Mrs. Bowen bade her coachman drive + Colville to his hotel. But both the ladies' voices called + good-night to him as he drove away. He fancied a shade of + mocking in Miss Graham's voice. + </p> + <p> + The great outer door of the hotel was locked, of course, and + the poor little porter kept Colville thumping at it some time + before he unlocked it, full of sleepy smiles and apologies. + "I'm sorry to wake you up," said Colville kindly. + </p> + <p> + "It is my duty," said the porter, with amiable heroism. He + discharged another duty by lighting a whole new candle, which + would be set down to Colville's account, and went before him + to his room, up the wide stairs, cold in their white linen + path, and on through the crooked corridors haunted by the + ghosts of extinct <i>tables d'hôte</i>, and full of + goblin shadows. He had recovered a noonday suavity by the + time he reached Colville's door, and bowed himself out, after + lighting the candles within, with a sweet plenitude of + politeness, which Colville, even in his gloomy mood, could + not help admiring in a man in his shirt sleeves, with only + one suspender up. + </p> + <p> + If there had been a fire, Colville would have liked to sit + down before it, and take an account of his feelings, but the + atmosphere of a bed-chamber in a Florentine hotel at + half-past three o'clock on a winter morning is not one that + invites to meditation; and he made haste to get into bed, + with nothing clearer in his mind than a shapeless sense of + having been trifled with. He ought not to have gone to a + dancing party, to begin with, and then he certainly ought not + to have attempted to dance; so far he might have been master + of the situation, and was responsible for it; but he was, + over and above this, aware of not having wished to do either, + of having been wrought upon against his convictions to do + both. He regarded now with supreme loathing a fantastic + purpose which he had formed while tramping round on those + women's dresses, of privately taking lessons in dancing, and + astonishing Miss Graham at the next ball where they met. Miss + Graham? What did he care for that child? Or Mrs. Bowen + either, for the matter of that? Had he come four thousand + miles to be used, to be played with, by them? At this point + Colville was aware of the brutal injustice of his mood. They + were ladies, both of them, charming and good, and he had been + a fool; that was all. It was not the first time he had been a + fool for women. An inexpressible bitterness for that old + wrong, which, however he had been used to laugh at it and + despise it, had made his life solitary and barren, poured + upon his soul; it was as if it had happened to him yesterday. + </p> + <p> + A band of young men burst from one of the narrow streets + leading into the piazza and straggled across it, letting + their voices flare out upon the silence, and then drop + extinct one by one. A whole world of faded associations + flushed again in Colville's heart. This was Italy; this was + Florence; and he execrated the hour in which he had dreamed + of returning. + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p><a name="VII"><!--Marker--></a> + <h2> + VII + </h2><br> + <br> + + <p> + The next morning's sunshine dispersed the black mood of the + night before; but enough of Colville's self-disgust remained + to determine him not to let his return to Florence be + altogether vain, or his sojourn so idle as it had begun + being. The vague purpose which he had cherished of studying + the past life and character of the Florentines in their + architecture shaped itself anew in the half-hour which he + gave himself over his coffee; and he turned it over in his + mind with that mounting joy in its capabilities which attends + the contemplation of any sort of artistic endeavour. No + people had ever more distinctly left the impress of their + whole temper in their architecture, or more sharply + distinguished their varying moods from period to period in + their palaces and temples. He believed that he could not only + supply that brief historical sketch of Florence which Mrs. + Bowen had lamented the want of, but he could make her history + speak an unintelligible, an unmistakeable tongue in every + monument of the past, from the Etruscan wall at Fiesole to + the cheap, plain, and tasteless shaft raised to commemorate + Italian Unity in the next piazza. With sketches from his own + pencil, illustrative of points which he could not otherwise + enforce, he could make such a book on Florence as did not + exist, such a book as no one had yet thought of making. With + this object in his mind, making and keeping him young, he + could laugh with any one who liked at the vanity of the + middle-aged Hoosier who had spoiled a set in the Lancers at + Madame Uccelli's party; he laughed at him now alone, with a + wholly impersonal sense of his absurdity. + </p> + <p> + After breakfast he went without delay to Viesseux's + reading-room, to examine his catalogue, and see what there + was in it to his purpose. While he was waiting his turn to + pay his subscription, with the people who surrounded the + proprietor, half a dozen of the acquaintances he had made at + Mrs. Bowen's passed in and out. Viesseux's is a place where + sooner or later you meet every one you know among the foreign + residents at Florence; the natives in smaller proportion + resort there too; and Colville heard a lady asking for a book + in that perfect Italian which strikes envy to the heart of + the stranger sufficiently versed in the language to know that + he never shall master it. He rather rejoiced in his despair, + however, as an earnest of his renewed intellectual life. + Henceforth his life would be wholly intellectual. He did not + regret his little excursion into society; it had shown him + with dramatic sharpness how unfit for it he was. + </p> + <p> + "Good <i>morning</i>!" said some one in a bland undertone + full of a pleasant recognition of the claims to quiet of a + place where some others were speaking in their ordinary + tones. + </p> + <p> + Colville looked round on the Rev. Mr. Waters, and took his + friendly hand. "Good morning—glad to see you," he + answered. + </p> + <p> + "Are you looking for that short Florentine history for Mrs. + Bowen's little girl?" asked Mr. Waters, inclining his head + slightly for the reply. "She mentioned it to me." + </p> + <p> + By day Colville remarked more distinctly that the old + gentleman was short and slight, with a youthful eagerness in + his face surviving on good terms with the grey locks that + fell down his temples from under the brim of his soft felt + hat. With the boyish sweetness of his looks blended a sort of + appreciative shrewdness, which pointed his smiling lips + slightly aslant in what seemed the expectation rather than + the intention of humour. + </p> + <p> + "Not exactly," said Colville, experiencing a difficulty in + withholding the fact that in some sort he was just going to + write a short Florentine history, and finding a certain + pleasure in Mrs. Bowen's having remembered that he had taken + an interest in Effie's reading. He had a sudden wish to tell + Mr. Waters of his plan, but this was hardly the time or + place. + </p> + <p> + They now found themselves face to face with the librarian, + and Mr. Waters made a gesture of waiving himself in + Colville's favour. + </p> + <p> + "No, no!" said the latter; "you had better ask. I am going to + put this gentleman through rather an extended course of + sprouts." + </p> + <p> + The librarian smiled with the helplessness of a foreigner, + who knows his interlocutor's English, but not the meaning of + it. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I merely wanted to ask," said Mr. Waters, addressing the + librarian, and explaining to Colville, "whether you had + received that book on Savonarola yet. The German one." + </p> + <p> + "I shall see," said the librarian, and he went upon a quest + that kept him some minutes. + </p> + <p> + "You're not thinking of taking Savonarola's life, I suppose?" + suggested Colville. + </p> + <p> + "Oh no. Villari's book has covered the whole ground for ever, + it seems to me. It's a wonderful book. You've read it?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes. It's a thing that makes you feel that, after all, the + Italians have only to make a real effort in any direction, + and they go ahead of everybody else. What biography of the + last twenty years can compare with it?" + </p> + <p> + "You're right, sir—you're right," cried the old man + enthusiastically. "They're a gifted race, a people of + genius." + </p> + <p> + "I wish for their own sakes they'd give their minds a little + to generalship," said Colville, pressed by the facts to hedge + somewhat. "They did get so badly smashed in their last war, + poor fellows." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I don't think I should like them any better if they were + better soldiers. Perhaps the lesson of noble endurance that + they've given our times is all that we have the right to + demand of them in the way of heroism; no one can say they + lack courage. And sometimes it seems to me that in simply + outgrowing the different sorts of despotism that had fastened + upon them, till their broken bonds fell away without positive + effort on their part, they showed a greater sublimity than if + they had violently conquered their freedom. Most nations sink + lower and lower under tyranny; the Italians grew steadily + more and more civilised, more noble, more gentle, more grand. + It was a wonderful spectacle—like a human soul + perfected through suffering and privation. Every period of + their history is full of instruction. I find my ancestral + puritanism particularly appealed to by the puritanism of + Savonarola." + </p> + <p> + "Then Villari hasn't satisfied you that Savonarola wasn't a + Protestant?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes, he has. I said his puritanism. Just now I'm + interested in justifying his failure to myself, for it's one + of the things in history that I've found it hardest to + accept. But no doubt his puritanic state fell because it was + dreary and ugly, as the puritanic state always has been. It + makes its own virtues intolerable; puritanism won't let you + see how good and beautiful the Puritans often are. It was + inevitable that Savonarola's enemies should misunderstand and + hate him." + </p> + <p> + "You are one of the last men I should have expected to find + among the <i>Arrabiati</i>," said Colville. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, there's a great deal to be said for the Florentine + Arrabiati, as well as for the English Malignants, though the + Puritans in neither case would have known how to say it. + Savonarola perished because he was excessive. I am studying + him in this aspect; it is fresh ground. It is very + interesting to inquire just at what point a man's virtues + become mischievous and intolerable." + </p> + <p> + These ideas interested Colville; he turned to them with + relief from the sense of his recent trivialities; in this old + man's earnestness he found support and encouragement in the + new course he had marked out for himself. Sometimes it had + occurred to him not only that he was too old for the + interests of his youth at forty, but that there was no longer + time for him to take up new ones. He considered Mr. Waters's + grey hairs, and determined to be wiser. "I should like to + talk these things over with you—and some other things," + he said. + </p> + <p> + The librarian came toward them with the book for Mr. Waters, + who was fumbling near-sightedly in his pocket-book for his + card. "I shall be very happy to see you at my room," he said. + "Ah, thank you," he added, taking his book, with a simple + relish as if it were something whose pleasantness was + sensible to the touch. He gave Colville the scholar's far-off + look as he turned to go: he was already as remote as the + fifteenth century through the magic of the book, which he + opened and began to read at once. Colville stared after him; + he did not wish to come to just that yet, either. Life, + active life, life of his own day, called to him; he had been + one of its busiest children: could he turn his back upon it + for any charm or use that was in the past? Again that + unnerving doubt, that paralysing distrust, beset him, and + tempted him to curse the day in which he had returned to this + outworn Old World. Idler on its modern surface, or delver in + its deep-hearted past, could he reconcile himself to it? What + did he care for the Italians of to-day, or the history of the + Florentines as expressed in their architectural monuments? It + was the problems of the vast, tumultuous American life, which + he had turned his back on, that really concerned him. Later + he might take up the study that fascinated yonder old man, + but for the present it was intolerable. + </p> + <p> + He was no longer young, that was true; but with an ache of + old regret he felt that he had not yet lived his life, that + his was a baffled destiny, an arrested fate. A lady came up + and took his turn with the librarian, and Colville did not + stay for another. He went out and walked down the Lung' Arno + toward the Cascine. The sun danced on the river, and bathed + the long line of pale buff and grey houses that followed its + curve, and ceased in the mist of leafless tree-tops where the + Cascine began. It was not the hour of the promenade, and + there was little driving; but the sidewalks were peopled + thickly enough with persons, in groups, or singly, who had + the air of straying aimlessly up or down, with no purpose but + to be in the sun, after the rainy weather of the past week. + There were faces of invalids, wistful and thin, and here and + there a man, muffled to the chin, lounged feebly on the + parapet and stared at the river. Colville hastened by them; + they seemed to claim him as one of their ailing and aging + company, and just then he was in the humour of being very + young and strong. + </p> + <p> + A carriage passed before him through the Cascine gates, and + drove down the road next the river. He followed, and when it + had got a little way it stopped at the roadside, and a lady + and little girl alighted, who looked about and caught sight + of him, and then obviously waited for him to come up with + them. It was Imogene and Effie Bowen, and the young girl + called to him: "We <i>thought</i> it was you. Aren't you + astonished to find us here at this hour?" she demanded, as + soon as he came up, and gave him her hand. "Mrs. Bowen sent + us for our health—or Effie's health—and I was + just making the man stop and let us out for a little walk." + </p> + <p> + "My health is very much broken too, Miss Effie," said + Colville. "Will you let me walk with you?" The child smiled, + as she did at Colville's speeches, which she apparently + considered all jokes, but diplomatically referred the + decision to Imogene with an upward glance. + </p> + <p> + "We shall be very glad indeed," said the girl. + </p> + <p> + "That's very polite of you. But Miss Effie makes no effort to + conceal her dismay," said Colville. + </p> + <p> + The little girl smiled again, and her smile was so like the + smile of Lina Ridgely, twenty years ago, that his next words + were inevitably tinged with reminiscence. + </p> + <p> + "Does one still come for one's health to the Cascine? When I + was in Florence before, there was no other place if one went + to look for it with young ladies—the Cascine or the + Boboli Gardens. Do they keep the fountain of youth turned on + here during the winter still?" + </p> + <p> + "I've never seen it," said Imogene gaily. + </p> + <p> + "Of course not. You never looked for it. Neither did I when I + was here before. But it wouldn't escape me now." + </p> + <p> + Since he had met them he had aged again, in spite of his + resolutions to the contrary; somehow, beside their buoyancy + and bloom, the youth in his heart faded. + </p> + <p> + Imogene had started forward as soon as he joined them, and + Colville, with Effie's gloved hand stolen shyly in his, was + finding it quite enough to keep up with her in her elastic + advance. + </p> + <p> + She wore a long habit of silk, whose fur-trimmed edge + wandered diagonally across her breast and down to the edge of + her walking dress. To Colville, whom her girlish slimness in + her ball costume had puzzled after his original impressions + of Junonian abundance, she did not so much dwindle as seem to + vanish from the proportions his visions had assigned her that + first night when he saw her standing before the mirror. In + this outdoor avatar, this companionship with the sun and + breeze, she was new to him again, and he found himself + searching his consciousness for his lost acquaintance with + her, and feeling as if he knew her less and less. Perhaps, + indeed, she had no very distinctive individuality; perhaps at + her age no woman has, but waits for it to come to her through + life, through experience. She was an expression of youth, of + health, of beauty, and of the moral loveliness that comes + from a fortunate combination of these; but beyond this she + was elusive in a way that seemed to characterise her even + materially. He could not make anything more of the mystery as + he walked at her side, and he went thinking—formlessly, + as people always think—that with the child or with her + mother he would have had a community of interest and feeling + which he lacked with this splendid girlhood! he was both too + young and too old for it; and then, while he answered this or + that to Imogene's talk aptly enough, his mind went back to + the time when this mystery was no mystery, or when he was + contemporary with it, and if he did not understand it, at + least accepted it as if it wore the most natural thing in the + world. It seemed a longer time now since it had been in his + world than it was since he was a child. + </p> + <p> + "Should you have thought," she asked, turning her face back + toward him, "that it would be so hot in the sun to-day? + <i>Oh</i>, that beautiful river! How it twists and writhes + along! Do you remember that sonnet of Longfellow's—the + one he wrote in Italian about the Ponte Vecchio, and the Arno + twisting like a dragon underneath it? They say that Hawthorne + used to live in a villa just behind the hill over there; + we're going to look it up as soon as the weather is settled. + Don't you think his books are perfectly fascinating?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said Colville; "only I should want a good while to say + it." + </p> + <p> + "<i>I</i> shouldn't!" retorted the girl. "When you've said + fascinating, you've said everything. There's no other word + for them. Don't you like to talk about the books you've + read?" + </p> + <p> + "I would if I could remember the names of the characters. But + I get them mixed up." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, <i>I</i> never do! I remember the least one of them, and + all they do and say." + </p> + <p> + "I used to." + </p> + <p> + "It seems to me you <i>used</i> to do everything." + </p> + <p> + "It seems to me as if I did." + </p> + <p> + "'I remember, when I think,<br> + That my youth was half divine.'" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, Tennyson—yes! <i>He's</i> fascinating. Don't you + think he's fascinating?" + </p> + <p> + "Very," said Colville. He was wondering whether this were the + kind of talk that he thought was literary when he was a young + fellow. + </p> + <p> + "How perfectly weird the 'Vision of Sin' is!" Imogene + continued. "Don't you like <i>weird</i> things?" + </p> + <p> + "Weird things?" Colville reflected. "Yes; but I don't see + very much in them any more. The fact is, they don't seem to + come to anything in particular." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, <i>I</i> think they do! I've had dreams that I've lived + on for days. Do you ever have prophetic dreams?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes; but they never come true. When they do, I know that I + didn't have them." + </p> + <p> + "What <i>do</i> you mean?" + </p> + <p> + "I mean that we are all so fond of the marvellous that we + can't trust ourselves about any experience that seems + supernatural. If a ghost appeared to me I should want him to + prove it by at least two other reliable, disinterested + witnesses before I believed my own account of the matter." + </p> + <p> + "Oh!" cried the girl, half puzzled, half amused. "Then of + course you don't believe in ghosts?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes; I expect to be one myself some day. But I'm in no hurry + to mingle with them." + </p> + <p> + Imogene smiled vaguely, as if the talk pleased her, even when + it mocked the fancies and whims which, after so many + generations that have indulged them, she was finding so fresh + and new in her turn. + </p> + <p> + "Don't you like to walk by the side of a river?" she asked, + increasing her eager pace a little. "I feel as if it were + bearing me along." + </p> + <p> + "I feel as if I were carrying it," said Colville. "It's as + fatiguing as walking on railroad ties." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, that's too bad!" cried the girl. "How can you be so + prosaic? Should you ever have believed that the sun could be + so hot in January? And look at those ridiculous green + hillsides over the river there! Don't you like it to be + winter when it <i>is</i> winter?" + </p> + <p> + She did not seem to have expected anything from Colville but + an impulsive acquiescence, but she listened while he defended + the mild weather. "I think it's very well for Italy," he + said. "It has always seemed to me—that is, it seems to + me now for the first time, but one has to begin the other + way—as if the seasons here had worn themselves out like + the turbulent passions of the people. I dare say the winter + was much fiercer in the times of the Bianchi and Neri." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, how delightful! Do you really believe that?" + </p> + <p> + "No, I don't know that I do. But I shouldn't have much + difficulty in proving it, I think, to the sympathetic + understanding." + </p> + <p> + "I wish you would prove it to mine. It sounds so pretty, I'm + sure it must be true." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, then, it isn't necessary. I'll reserve my arguments for + Mrs. Bowen." + </p> + <p> + "You had better. She isn't at all romantic. She says it's + very well for me she isn't—that her being + matter-of-fact lets me be as romantic as I like." + </p> + <p> + "Then Mrs. Bowen isn't as romantic as she would like to be if + she hadn't charge of a romantic young lady?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I don't say that. Dear me! I'd no idea it <i>could</i> + be so hot in January." As they strolled along beside the long + hedge of laurel, the carriage slowly following them at a + little distance, the sun beat strong upon the white road, + blotched here and there with the black irregular shadows of + the ilexes. The girl undid the pelisse across her breast, + with a fine impetuosity, and let it swing open as she walked. + She stopped suddenly. "Hark! What bird was that?" + </p> + <p> + "'It was the nightingale, and not the lark,'" suggested + Colville lazily. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, <i>don't</i> you think <i>Romeo and Juliet</i> is + divine?" demanded Imogene, promptly dropping the question of + the bird. + </p> + <p> + "I don't know about Romeo," returned Colville, "but it's + sometimes occurred to me that Juliet was rather + forth-putting." + </p> + <p> + "You <i>know</i> she wasn't. It's my favourite play. I could + go every night. It's perfectly amazing to me that they can + play anything else." + </p> + <p> + "You would like it five hundred nights in the year, like + <i>Hazel Kirke</i>? That would be a good deal of Romeo, not + to say Juliet." + </p> + <p> + "They ought to do it out of respect to Shakespeare. Don't you + like Shakespeare?" + </p> + <p> + "Well, I've seen the time when I preferred Alexander Smith," + said Colville evasively. + </p> + <p> + "Alexander Smith? Who in the world is Alexander Smith?" + </p> + <p> + "How recent you are! Alexander Smith was an immortal who + flourished about the year 1850." + </p> + <p> + "That was before I was born. How could I remember him? But I + don't feel so very recent for all that." + </p> + <p> + "Neither do I, this morning," said Colville. "I was up at one + of Pharaoh's balls last night, and I danced too much." + </p> + <p> + He gave Imogene a droll glance, and then bent it upon Effie's + discreet face. The child dropped her eyes with a blush like + her mother's, having first sought provisional counsel of + Imogene, who turned away. He rightly inferred that they all + had been talking him over at breakfast, and he broke into a + laugh which they joined in, but Imogene said nothing in + recognition of the fact. + </p> + <p> + With what he felt to be haste for his relief she said, "Don't + you hate to be told to read a book?" + </p> + <p> + "I used to—quarter of a century ago," said Colville, + recognising that this was the way young people talked, even + then. + </p> + <p> + "Used to?" she repeated. "Don't you now?" + </p> + <p> + "No; I'm a great deal more tractable now. I always say that I + shall get the book out of the library. I draw the line at + buying. I still hate to buy a book that people recommend." + </p> + <p> + "What kind of books do you like to buy?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, no kind. I think we ought to get all our books out of + the library." + </p> + <p> + "Do you never like to talk in earnest?" + </p> + <p> + "Well, not often," said Colville. "Because, if you do, you + can't say with a good conscience afterward that you were only + in fun." + </p> + <p> + "Oh! And do you always like to talk so that you can get out + of things afterward?" + </p> + <p> + "No. I didn't say that, did I?" + </p> + <p> + "Very nearly, I should think." + </p> + <p> + "Then I'm glad I didn't quite." + </p> + <p> + "I like people to be outspoken—to say everything they + think," said the girl, regarding him with a puzzled look. + </p> + <p> + "Then I foresee that I shall become a favourite," answered + Colville. "I say a great deal more than I think." + </p> + <p> + She looked at him again with envy, with admiration, + qualifying her perplexity. They had come to a point where + some moss-grown, weather-beaten statues stood at the corners + of the road that traversed the bosky stretch between the + avenues of the Cascine. "Ah, how beautiful they are!" he + said, halting, and giving himself to the rapture that a + blackened garden statue imparts to one who beholds it from + the vantage-ground of sufficient years and experience. + </p> + <p> + "Do you remember that story of Heine's," he resumed, after a + moment, "of the boy who steals out of the old castle by + moonlight, and kisses the lips of the garden statue, fallen + among the rank grass of the ruinous parterres? And long + afterward, when he looks down on the sleep of the dying girl + where she lies on the green sofa, it seems to him that she + and that statue are the same?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh!" deeply sighed the young girl. "No, I never read it. + Tell me what it is. I <i>must</i> read it." + </p> + <p> + "The rest is all talk—very good talk; but I doubt + whether it would interest you. He goes on to talk of a great + many things—-of the way Bellini spoke French, for + example. He says it was bloodcurdling, horrible, cataclysmal. + He brought out the poor French words and broke them upon the + wheel, till you thought the whole world must give way with a + thunder-crash. A dead hush reigned in the room; the women did + not know whether to faint or fly; the men looked down at + their pantaloons, and tried to realise what they had on." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, how perfectly delightful! how shameful!" cried the girl. + "I <i>must</i> read it. What is it in? What is the name of + the story?" + </p> + <p> + "It isn't a story," said Colville. "Did you ever see anything + lovelier than these statues?" + </p> + <p> + "No," said Imogene. "<i>Are</i> they good?" + </p> + <p> + "They are much better than good—they are the very worst + rococo." + </p> + <p> + "What makes you say they are beautiful, then?" + </p> + <p> + "Why, don't you see? They commemorate youth, gaiety, + brilliant, joyous life. That's what that kind of statues was + made for—to look on at rich, young, beautiful people + and their gallantries; to be danced before by fine ladies and + gentlemen playing at shepherd and shepherdesses; to be driven + past by marcheses and contessinas flirting in carriages; to + be hung with scarfs and wreaths; to be parts of eternal + <i>fétes champêtres</i>. Don't you see how bored + they look? When I first came to Italy I should have detested + and ridiculed their bad art; but now they're + exquisite—the worse, the better," + </p> + <p> + "I don't know what in the world you <i>do</i> mean," said + Imogene, laughing uneasily. + </p> + <p> + "Mrs. Bowen would. It's a pity Mrs. Bowen isn't here with us. + Miss Effie, if I lift you up to one of those statues, will + you kindly ask it if it doesn't remember a young American + signor who was here just before the French Revolution? I + don't believe it's forgotten me." + </p> + <p> + "No, no," said Imogene. "It's time we were walking back. + Don't you like Scott!" she added. "I should think you would + if you like those romantic things. I used to like Scott so + <i>much</i>. When I was fifteen I wouldn't read anything but + Scott. Don't you like Thackeray? Oh, he's so <i>cynical</i>! + It's perfectly delightful." + </p> + <p> + "Cynical?" repeated Colville thoughtfully. "I was looking + into <i>The Newcomes</i> the other day, and I thought he was + rather sentimental" + </p> + <p> + "Sentimental! Why, what an idea! That is the strangest thing + I ever heard of. Oh!" she broke in upon her own amazement, + "don't you think Browning's 'Statue and the Bust' is + splendid? Mr. Morton read it to us—to Mrs. Bowen, I + mean." + </p> + <p> + Colville resented this freedom of Mr. Morion's, he did not + know just why; then his pique was lost in sarcastic + recollection of the time when he too used to read poems to + ladies. He had read that poem to Lina Ridgely and the other + one. + </p> + <p> + "Mrs. Bowen asked him to read it," Imogene continued. + </p> + <p> + "Did she?" asked Colville pensively. + </p> + <p> + "And then we discussed it afterward. We had a long + discussion. And then he read us the 'Legend of Pornic,' and + we had a discussion about that. Mrs. Bowen says it was real + gold they found in the coffin; but I think it was the girl's + 'gold hair.' I don't know which Mr. Morion thought. Which do + you? Don't you think the 'Legend of Pornic' is splendid?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes, it's a great poem, and deep," said Colville. They had + come to a place where the bank sloped invitingly to the + river. "Miss Effie," he asked, "wouldn't you like to go down + and throw stones into the Arno? That's what a river is for," + he added, as the child glanced toward Imogene for + authorisation, "to have stones thrown into it." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, let us!" cried Imogene, rushing down to the brink. "I + don't want to throw stones into it, but to get near + it—to get near to any bit of nature. They do pen you up + so from it in Europe!" She stood and watched Colville skim + stones over the current. "When you stand by the shore of a + swift river like this, or near a railroad train when it comes + whirling by, don't you ever have a morbid impulse to fling + yourself forward?" + </p> + <p> + "Not at my time of life," said Colville, stooping to select a + flat stone. "Morbid impulses are one of the luxuries of + youth." He threw the stone, which skipped triumphantly far + out into the stream. "That was beautiful, wasn't it, Miss + Effie?" + </p> + <p> + "Lovely!" murmured the child. + </p> + <p> + He offered her a flat pebble. "Would you like to try one?" + </p> + <p> + "It would spoil my gloves," she said, in deprecating refusal. + </p> + <p> + "Let <i>me</i> try it!" cried Imogene. "I'm not afraid of my + gloves." + </p> + <p> + Colville yielded the pebble, looking at her with the thought + of how intoxicating he should once have found this bit of + wilful <i>abandon</i>, but feeling rather sorry for it now. + "Oh, perhaps not?" he said, laying his hand upon hers, and + looking into her eyes. + </p> + <p> + She returned his look, and then she dropped the pebble and + put her hand back in her muff, and turned and ran up the + bank. "There's the carriage. It's time we should be going." + At the top of the bank she became a mirror of dignity, a + transparent mirror to his eye. "Are you going back to town, + Mr. Colville?" she asked, with formal state. "We could set + you down anywhere!" + </p> + <p> + "Thank you, Miss Graham. I shall be glad to avail myself of + your very kind offer. Allow me." He handed her ceremoniously + to the carriage; he handed Effie Bowen even more + ceremoniously to the carriage, holding his hat in one hand + while he offered the other. Then he mounted to the seat in + front of them. "The weather has changed," he said. + </p> + <p> + Imogene hid her face in her muff, and Effie Bowen bowed hers + against Imogene's shoulder. + </p> + <p> + A sense of the girl's beauty lingered in Colville's thought + all day, and recurred to him again and again; and the + ambitious intensity and enthusiasm of her talk came back in + touches of amusement and compassion. How divinely young it + all was, and how lovely! He patronised it from a height far + aloof. + </p> + <p> + He was not in the frame of mind for the hotel table, and he + went to lunch, at a restaurant. He chose a simple trattoria, + the first he came to, and he took his seat at one of the + bare, rude tables, where the joint saucers for pepper and + salt, and a small glass for toothpicks, with a much-scraped + porcelain box for matches, expressed an uncorrupted + Florentinity of custom. But when he gave his order in offhand + Italian, the waiter answered in the French which waiters get + together for the traveller's confusion in Italy, and he + resigned himself to whatever chance of acquaintance might + befall him. The place had a companionable smell of stale + tobacco, and the dim light showed him on the walls of a space + dropped a step or two lower, at the end of the room, a + variety of sketches and caricatures. A waiter was laying a + large table in this space, and when Colville came up to + examine the drawings he jostled him, with due apologies, in + the haste of a man working against time for masters who will + brook no delay. He was hurrying still when a party of young + men came in and took their places at the table, and began to + rough him for his delay. Colville could recognise several of + them in the vigorous burlesques on the walls, and as others + dropped in the grotesque portraitures made him feel as if he + had seen them before. They all talked at once, each man of + his own interests, except when they joined in a shout of + mockery and welcome for some new-comer. Colville, at his + <i>risotto</i>, almost the room's length away, could hear + what they thought, one and another, of Botticelli and + Michelangelo; of old Piloty's things at Munich; of the dishes + they had served to them, and of the quality of the Chianti; + of the respective merits of German and Italian tobacco; of + whether Inglehart had probably got to Venice yet; of the + personal habits of Billings, and of the question whether the + want of modelling in Simmons's nose had anything to do with + his style of snoring; of the overrated colouring of some of + those Venetian fellows; of the delicacy of Mino da Fiesole, + and of the genius of Babson's tailor. Babson was there to + defend the cut of his trousers, and Billings and Simmons were + present to answer for themselves at the expense of the + pictures of those who had called their habits and features + into question. When it came to this all the voices joined in + jolly uproar. Derision and denial broke out of the tumult, + and presently they were all talking quietly of a reception + which some of them were at the day before. Then Colville + heard one of them saying that he would like a chance to paint + some lady whose name he did not catch, and "She looks awfully + sarcastic," one of the young fellows said. + </p> + <p> + "They say she <i>is</i>," said another. "They say she's + awfully intellectual." + </p> + <p> + "Boston?" queried a third. + </p> + <p> + "No, Kalamazoo. The centre of culture is out there now." + </p> + <p> + "She knows how to dress, anyhow," said the first commentator. + "I wonder what Parker would talk to her about when he was + painting her. He's never read anything but Poe's 'Ullalume.'" + </p> + <p> + "Well, that's a good subject—'Ullalume.'" + </p> + <p> + "I suppose she's read it?" + </p> + <p> + "She's read 'most everything, they say." + </p> + <p> + "What's an Ullalume, anyway, Parker?" + </p> + <p> + One of the group sprang up from the table and drew on the + wall what he labelled "An Ullalume." Another rapidly depicted + Parker in the moment of sketching a young lady; her portrait + had got as far as the eyes and nose when some one protested: + "Oh, hello! No personalities." + </p> + <p> + The draughtsman said, "Well, all right!" and sat down again. + </p> + <p> + "Hall talked with her the most. What did she say, Hall?" + </p> + <p> + "Hall can't remember words in three syllables, but he says it + was mighty brilliant and mighty deep." + </p> + <p> + "They say she's a niece of Mrs. Bowen's. She's staying with + Mrs. Bowen." + </p> + <p> + Then it was the wisdom and brilliancy and severity of Imogene + Graham that these young men stood in awe of! Colville + remembered how the minds of girls of twenty had once dazzled + him. "And yes," he mused, "she must have believed that we + were talking literature in the Cascine. Certainly I should + have thought it an intellectual time when I was at that age," + he owned to himself with forlorn irony. + </p> + <p> + The young fellows went on to speak of Mrs. Bowen, whom it + seemed they had known the winter before. She had been very + polite to them; they praised her as if she were quite an old + woman. + </p> + <p> + "But she must have been a very pretty girl," one of them put + in. + </p> + <p> + "Well, she has a good deal of style yet." + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes, but she never could have been a beauty like the + other one." + </p> + <p> + On her part, Imogene was very sober when she met Mrs. Bowen, + though she had come in flushed and excited from the air and + the morning's adventure. Mrs. Bowen was sitting by the fire, + placidly reading; a vase of roses on the little table near + her diffused the delicate odour of winter roses through the + room; all seemed very still and dim, and of another time, + somehow. + </p> + <p> + Imogene kept away from the fire, sitting down, in the + provisional fashion of women, with her things on; but she + unbuttoned her pelisse and flung it open. Effie had gone to + her room. + </p> + <p> + "Did you have a pleasant drive?" asked Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + "Very," said the girl. + </p> + <p> + "Mr. Morton brought you these roses," continued Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + "Oh," said Imogene, with a cold glance at them. + </p> + <p> + "The Flemmings have asked us to a party Thursday. There is to + be dancing." + </p> + <p> + "The Flemmings?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes." As if she now saw reason to do so, Mrs. Bowen laid the + book face downward in her lap. She yawned a little, with her + hand on her mouth. "Did you meet any one you knew?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes; Mr. Colville." Mrs. Bowen cut her yawn in half. "We got + out to walk in the Cascine, and we saw him coming in at the + gate. He came up and asked if he might walk with us." + </p> + <p> + "Did you have a pleasant walk?" asked Mrs. Bowen, a breath + more chillily than she had asked if they had a pleasant + drive. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, pleasant enough. And then we came back and went down + the river bank, and he skipped stones, and we took him to his + hotel." + </p> + <p> + "Was there anybody you knew in the Cascine?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh no; the place was a howling wilderness. I never saw it so + deserted," said the girl impatiently. "It was terribly hot + walking. I thought I should burn up." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen did not answer anything; she let the book lie in + her lap. + </p> + <p> + "What an odd person Mr. Colville is!" said Imogene, after a + moment. "Don't you think he's very different from other + gentlemen?" + </p> + <p> + "Why?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, he has such a peculiar way of talking." + </p> + <p> + "What peculiar way?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I don't know. Plenty of the young men I see talk + cynically, and I do sometimes myself—desperately, don't + you know. But then I know very well we don't mean anything by + it." + </p> + <p> + "And do you think Mr. Colville does? Do you think he talks + cynically?" + </p> + <p> + Imogene leaned back in her chair and reflected. "No," she + returned slowly, "I can't say that he does. But he talks + lightly, with a kind of touch and go that makes you feel that + he has exhausted all feeling. He doesn't parade it at all. + But you hear between the words, don't you know, just as you + read between the lines in some kinds of poetry. Of course + it's everything in knowing what he's been through. He's + perfectly unaffected; and don't you think he's good?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes," sighed Mrs. Bowen. "In his way." + </p> + <p> + "But he sees through you. Oh, quite! Nothing escapes him, and + pretty soon he lets out that he has seen through you, and + then you feel so <i>flat</i>! Oh, it's perfectly intoxicating + to be with him. I would give the world to talk as he does." + </p> + <p> + "What was your talk all about?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I don't know. I suppose it would have been called rather + intellectual." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen smiled infinitesimally. But after a moment she + said gravely, "Mr. Colville is very much older than you. He's + old enough to be your father." + </p> + <p> + "Yes, I know that. You feel that he feels old, and it's + perfectly tragical. Sometimes when he turns that slow, dull, + melancholy look on you, he seems a thousand years old." + </p> + <p> + "I don't mean that he's positively old," said Mrs. Bowen. + "He's only old comparatively." + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes; I understand that. And I don't mean that he really + seems a thousand years old. What I meant was, he seems a + thousand years off, as if he were still young, and had got + left behind somehow. He seems to be on the other side of some + impassable barrier, and you want to get over there and help + him to our side, but you can't do it. I suppose his talking + in that light way is merely a subterfuge to hide his feeling, + to make him forget." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen fingered the edges of her book. "You mustn't let + your fancy run away with you, Imogene," she said, with a + little painful smile. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I <i>like</i> to let it run away with me. And when I get + such a subject as Mr. Colville, there's no stopping. I can't + stop, and I don't <i>wish</i> to stop. Shouldn't you have + thought that he would have been perfectly crushed at the + exhibition he made of himself in the Lancers last night? He + wasn't the least embarrassed when he met me, and the only + allusion he made to it was to say that he had been up late, + and had danced too much. Wasn't it wonderful he could do it? + Oh, if <i>I</i> could do that!" + </p> + <p> + "I wish he could have avoided the occasion for his bravado," + said Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + "I think I was a little to blame, perhaps," said the girl. "I + beckoned him to come and take the vacant place." + </p> + <p> + "I don't see that that was an excuse," returned Mrs. Bowen + primly. + </p> + <p> + Imogene seemed insensible to the tone, as it concerned + herself; it only apparently reminded her of something. "Guess + what Mr. Colville said, when I had been silly, and then tried + to make up for it by being very dignified all of a sudden?" + </p> + <p> + "I don't know. How had you been silly?" + </p> + <p> + The servant brought in some cards. Imogene caught up the + pelisse which she had been gradually shedding as she sat + talking to Mrs. Bowen, and ran out of the room by another + door. + </p> + <p> + They did not recur to the subject. But that night, when Mrs. + Bowen went to say good night to Effie, after the child had + gone to bed, she lingered. + </p> + <p> + "Effie," she said at last, in a husky whisper, "what did + Imogene say to Mr. Colville to-day that made him laugh?" + </p> + <p> + "I don't know," said the child. "They kept laughing at so + many things." + </p> + <p> + "Laughing?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes; he laughed. Do you mean toward the last, when he had + been throwing stones into the river?" + </p> + <p> + "It must have been then." + </p> + <p> + The child stretched herself drowsily. "Oh I couldn't + understand it all. She wanted to throw a stone in the river, + but he told her she had better not. But that didn't make + <i>him</i> laugh. She was so very stiff just afterward that + he said the weather had changed, and that made <i>us</i> + laugh." + </p> + <p> + "Was that all?" + </p> + <p> + "We kept laughing ever so long. I never saw any one like Mr. + Colville. How queerly the fire shines on your face! It gives + you such a beautiful complexion." + </p> + <p> + "Does it?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes, lovely." The child's mother stooped over and kissed + her. "You're the prettiest mamma in the world," she said, + throwing her arms round her neck. "Sometimes I can't tell + whether Imogene is prettier or not, but to-night I'm certain + you are. Do you like to have me think that?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes—yes. But don't pull me down so; you hurt my neck. + Good night." + </p> + <p> + The child let her go. "I haven't said my prayer yet, mamma. I + was thinking." + </p> + <p> + "Well, say it now, then," said the mother gently. + </p> + <p> + When the child had finished she turned upon her cheek. "Good + night, mamma." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen went about the room a little while, picking up its + pretty disorder. Then she sat down in a chair by the hearth, + where a log was still burning. The light of the flame + flickered upon her face, and threw upon the ceiling a + writhing, fantastic shadow, the odious caricature of her + gentle beauty. + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p><a name="VIII"><!--Marker--></a> + <h2> + VIII + </h2><br> + <br> + + <p> + In that still air of the Florentine winter, time seems to + share the arrest of the natural forces, the repose of the + elements. The pale blue sky is frequently overcast, and it + rains two days out of five; sometimes, under extraordinary + provocation from the north a snow-storm whirls along under + the low grey dome, and whitens the brown roofs, where a + growth of spindling weeds and grass clothes the tiles the + whole year round, and shows its delicate green above the + gathered flakes. But for the most part the winds are laid, + and the sole change is from quiet sun to quiet shower. This + at least is the impression which remains in the senses of the + sojourning stranger, whose days slip away with so little + difference one from another that they seem really not to have + passed, but, like the grass that keeps the hillsides fresh + round Florence all the winter long, to be waiting some + decisive change of season before they begin. + </p> + <p> + The first of the Carnival sights that marked the lapse of a + month since his arrival took Colville by surprise. He could + not have believed that it was February yet if it had not been + for the straggling maskers in armour whom he met one day in + Via Borgognissanti, with their visors up for their better + convenience in smoking. They were part of the chorus at one + of the theatres, and they were going about to eke out their + salaries with the gifts of people whose windows the festival + season privileged them to play under. The silly spectacle + stirred Colville's blood a little, as any sort of holiday + preparation was apt to do. He thought that it afforded him a + fair occasion to call at Palazzo Pinti, where he had not been + so much of late as in the first days of his renewed + acquaintance with Mrs. Bowen. He had at one time had the + fancy that Mrs. Bowen was cool toward him. He might very well + have been mistaken in this; in fact, she had several times + addressed him the politest reproaches for not coming, but he + made some evasion, and went only on the days when she was + receiving other people, and when necessarily he saw very + little of the family. + </p> + <p> + Miss Graham was always very friendly, but always very busy, + drawing tea from the samovar, and looking after others. Effie + Bowen dropped her eyes in re-established strangeness when she + brought the basket of cake to him. There was one moment when + he suspected that he had been talked over in family council, + and put under a certain regimen. But he had no proof of this, + and it had really nothing to do with his keeping away, which + was largely accidental. He had taken up, with as much + earnestness as he could reasonably expect of himself, that + notion of studying the architectural expression of Florentine + character at the different periods. He had spent a good deal + of money in books, he had revived his youthful familiarity + with the city, and he had made what acquaintance he could + with people interested in such matters. He met some of these + in the limited but very active society in which he mingled + daily and nightly. After the first strangeness to any sort of + social life had worn off, he found himself very fond of the + prompt hospitalities which his introduction at Mrs. Bowen's + had opened to him. His host—or more frequently it was + his hostess—had sometimes merely an apartment at a + hotel; perhaps the family was established in one of the + furnished lodgings which stretch the whole length of the + Lung' Arno on either hand, and abound in all the new streets + approaching the Cascine, and had set up the simple and facile + housekeeping of the sojourner in Florence for a few months; + others had been living in the villa or the palace they had + taken for years. + </p> + <p> + The more recent and transitory people expressed something of + the prevailing English and American aestheticism in the + decoration of their apartments, but the greater part accepted + the Florentine drawing-room as their landlord had imagined it + for them, with furniture and curtains in yellow satin, a + cheap ingrain carpet thinly covering the stone floor, and a + fire of little logs ineffectually blazing on the hearth, and + flickering on the carved frames of the pictures on the wall + and the nakedness of the frescoed allegories in the ceiling. + Whether of longer or shorter stay, the sojourners were bound + together by a common language and a common social tradition; + they all had a Day, and on that day there was tea and bread + and butter for every comer. They had one another to dine; + there were evening parties, with dancing and without dancing. + Colville even went to a fancy ball, where he was kept in + countenance by several other Florentines of the period of + Romola. At all these places he met nearly the same people, + whose alien life in the midst of the native community struck + him as one of the phases of modern civilisation worthy of + note, if not particular study; for he fancied it destined to + a wider future throughout Europe, as the conditions in + England and America grow more tiresome and more onerous. They + seemed to see very little of Italian society, and to be shut + out from practical knowledge of the local life by the terms + upon which they had themselves insisted. Our race finds its + simplified and cheapened London or New York in all its + Continental resorts now, but nowhere has its taste been so + much studied as in Italy, and especially in Florence. It was + not, perhaps, the real Englishman or American who had been + considered, but a <i>forestière</i> conventionalised + from the Florentine's observation of many Anglo-Saxons. But + he had been so well conjectured that he was hemmed round with + a very fair illusion of his national circumstances. + </p> + <p> + It was not that he had his English or American doctor to + prescribe for him when sick, and his English or American + apothecary to compound his potion; it was not that there was + an English tailor and an American dentist, an English + bookseller and an English baker, and chapels of every shade + of Protestantism, with Catholic preaching in English every + Sunday. These things were more or less matters of necessity, + but Colville objected that the barbers should offer him an + American shampoo; that the groceries should abound in English + biscuit and our own canned fruit and vegetables, and that the + grocers' clerks should be ambitious to read the labels of the + Boston baked beans. He heard—though he did not prove + this by experiment—that the master of a certain + trattoria had studied the doughnut of New England till he had + actually surpassed the original in the qualities that have + undermined our digestion as a people. But above all it + interested him to see that intense expression of American + civilisation, the horse-car, triumphing along the magnificent + avenues that mark the line of the old city walls; and he + recognised an instinctive obedience to an abtruse natural law + in the fact that whereas the omnibus, which the Italians have + derived from the English, was not filled beyond its seating + capacity, the horse-car was overcrowded without and within at + Florence, just as it is with us who invented it. + </p> + <p> + "I wouldn't mind even that," he said one day to the lady who + was drawing him his fifth or sixth cup of tea for that + afternoon, and with whom he was naturally making this absurd + condition of things a matter of personal question; "but you + people here pass your days in a round of unbroken English, + except when you talk with your servants. I'm not sure you + don't speak English with the shop people. I can hardly get + them to speak Italian to me." + </p> + <p> + "Perhaps they think you can speak English better," said the + lady. + </p> + <p> + This went over Florence; in a week it was told to Colville as + something said to some one else. He fearlessly reclaimed it + as said to himself, and this again was told. In the houses + where he visited he had the friendly acceptance of any + intelligent and reasonably agreeable person who comes + promptly and willingly when he is asked, and seems always to + have enjoyed himself when he goes away. But besides this sort + of general favour, he enjoyed a very pleasing little personal + popularity which came from his interest in other people, from + his good-nature, and from his inertness. He slighted no + acquaintance, and talked to every one with the same apparent + wish to be entertaining. This was because he was incapable of + the cruelty of open indifference when his lot was cast with a + dull person, and also because he was mentally too lazy to + contrive pretences for getting away; besides he did not + really find anybody altogether a bore, and he had no wish to + shine. He listened without shrinking to stories that he had + heard before, and to things that had already been said to + him; as has been noted, he had himself the habit of repeating + his ideas with the recklessness of maturity, for he had lived + long enough to know that this can be done with almost entire + safety. + </p> + <p> + He haunted the studios a good deal, and through a + retrospective affinity with art, and a human sympathy with + the sacrifice which it always involves, he was on friendly + terms with sculptors and painters who were not in every case + so friendly with one another. More than once he saw the scars + of old rivalries, and he might easily have been an adherent + of two or three parties. But he tried to keep the freedom of + the different camps without taking sides; and he felt the + pathos of the case when they all told the same story of the + disaster which the taste for bric-à-brac had wrought + to the cause of art; how people who came abroad no longer + gave orders for statues and pictures, but spent their money + on curtains and carpets, old chests and chairs, and pots and + pans. There were some among these artists whom he had known + twenty years before in Florence, ardent and hopeful + beginners; and now the backs of their grey or bald heads, as + they talked to him with their faces towards their work, and a + pencil or a pinch of clay held thoughtfully between their + fingers, appealed to him as if he had remained young and + prosperous, and they had gone forward to age and hard work. + They were very quaint at times. They talked the American + slang of the war days and of the days before the war; without + a mastery of Italian, they often used the idioms of that + tongue in their English speech. They were dim and vague about + the country, with whose affairs they had kept up through the + newspapers. Here and there one thought he was going home very + soon; others had finally relinquished all thoughts of return. + These had, perhaps without knowing it, lost the desire to + come back; they cowered before the expensiveness of life in + America, and doubted of a future with which, indeed, only the + young can hopefully grapple. But in spite of their + accumulated years, and the evil times on which they had + fallen, Colville thought them mostly very happy men, leading + simple and innocent lives in a world of the ideal, and rich + in the inexhaustible beauty of the city, the sky, the air. + They all, whether they were ever going back or not, were + fervent Americans, and their ineffaceable nationality marked + them, perhaps, all the more strongly for the patches of + something alien that overlaid it in places. They knew that he + was or had been a newspaper man; but if they secretly + cherished the hope that he would bring them to the <i>dolce + lume</i> of print, they never betrayed it; and the authorship + of his letter about the American artists in Florence, which + he printed in the <i>American Register</i> at Paris, was not + traced to him for a whole week. + </p> + <p> + Colville was a frequent visitor of Mr. Waters, who had a + lodging in Piazza San Marco, of the poverty which can always + be decent in Italy. It was bare, but for the books that + furnished it; with a table for his writing, on a corner of + which he breakfasted, a wide sofa with cushions in coarse + white linen that frankly confessed itself a bed by night, and + two chairs of plain Italian walnut; but the windows, which + had no sun, looked out upon the church and the convent sacred + to the old Socinian for the sake of the meek, heroic mystic + whom they keep alive in all the glory of his martyrdom. No + two minds could well have been further apart than the New + England minister and the Florentine monk, and no two souls + nearer together, as Colville recognised with a not irreverent + smile. + </p> + <p> + When the old man was not looking up some point of his saint's + history in his books, he was taking with the hopefulness of + youth and the patience of age a lesson in colloquial Italian + from his landlady's daughter, which he pronounced with a + scholarly scrupulosity and a sincere atonic Massachusetts + accent. He practised the language wherever he could, + especially at the trattoria where he dined, and where he made + occasions to detain the waiter in conversation. They humoured + him, out of their national good-heartedness and sympathy, and + they did what they could to realise a strange American dish + for him on Sundays—a combination of stockfish and + potatoes boiled, and then fried together in small cakes. They + revered him as a foreign gentleman of saintly amiability and + incomprehensible preferences; and he was held in equal regard + at the next green-grocer's where he spent every morning five + centessimi for a bunch of radishes and ten for a little pat + of butter to eat with his bread and coffee; he could not yet + accustom himself to mere bread and coffee for breakfast, + though he conformed as completely as he could to the Italian + way of living. He respected the abstemiousness of the race; + he held that it came from a spirituality of nature to which + the North was still strange, with all its conscience and + sense of individual accountability. He contended that he + never suffered in his small dealings with these people from + the dishonesty which most of his countrymen complained of; + and he praised their unfailing gentleness of manner; this + could arise only from goodness of heart, which was perhaps + the best kind of goodness after all. + </p> + <p> + None of these humble acquaintance of his could well have + accounted for the impression they all had that he was some + sort of ecclesiastic. They could never have + understood—nor, for that matter, could any one have + understood through European tradition—the sort of + sacerdotal office that Mr. Waters had filled so long in the + little deeply book-clubbed New England village where he had + outlived most of his flock, till one day he rose in the midst + of the surviving dyspeptics and consumptives and, following + the example of Mr. Emerson, renounced his calling for ever. + By that time even the pale Unitarianism thinning out into + paler doubt was no longer tenable with him. He confessed that + while he felt the Divine goodness more and more, he believed + that it was a mistake to preach any specific creed or + doctrine, and he begged them to release him from their + service. A young man came to fill his place in their pulpit, + but he kept his place in their hearts. They raised a + subscription of seventeen hundred dollars and thirty-five + cents; another being submitted to the new button + manufacturer, who had founded his industry in the village, he + promptly rounded it out to three thousand, and Mr. Waters + came to Florence. His people parted with him in terms of + regret as delicate as they were awkward, and their love + followed him. He corresponded regularly with two or three + ladies, and his letters were sometimes read from his pulpit. + </p> + <p> + Colville took the Piazza San Marco in on his way to Palazzo + Pinti on the morning when he had made up his mind to go + there, and he stood at the window looking out with the old + man, when some more maskers passed through the + place—two young fellows in old Florentine dress, with a + third habited as a nun. + </p> + <p> + "Ah," said the old man gently, "I wish they hadn't introduced + the nun! But I suppose they can't help signalising their + escape from the domination of the Church on all occasions. + It's a natural reaction. It will all come right in time." + </p> + <p> + "You preach the true American gospel," said Colville. + </p> + <p> + "Of course; there is no other gospel. That is the gospel." + </p> + <p> + "Do you suppose that Savonarola would think it had all come + out right," asked Colville, a little maliciously, "if he + could look from the window with us here and see the wicked + old Carnival, that he tried so hard to kill four hundred + years ago, still alive? And kicking?" he added, in cognisance + of the caper of one of the maskers. + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes; why not? By this time he knows that his puritanism + was all a mistake, unless as a thing for the moment only. I + should rather like to have Savonarola here with us; he would + find these costumes familiar; they are of his time. I shall + make a point of seeing all I can of the Carnival, as part of + my study of Savonarola, if nothing else." + </p> + <p> + "I'm afraid you'll have to give yourself limitations," said + Colville, as one of the maskers threw his arm round the + mock-nun's neck. But the old man did not see this, and + Colville did not feel it necessary to explain himself. + </p> + <p> + The maskers had passed out of the piazza, now, and "Have you + seen our friends at Palazzo Pinti lately?" said Mr. Waters. + </p> + <p> + "Not very," said Colville. "I was just on my way there." + </p> + <p> + "I wish you would make them my compliments. Such a beautiful + young creature." + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said Colville; "she is certainly a beautiful girl." + </p> + <p> + "I meant Mrs. Bowen," returned the old man quietly. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I thought you meant Miss Graham. Mrs. Bowen is my + contemporary, and so I didn't think of her when you said + young. I should have called her pretty rather than + beautiful." + </p> + <p> + "No; she's beautiful. The young girl is good-looking—I + don't deny that; but she is very crude yet." + </p> + <p> + Colville laughed. "Crude in looks? I should have said Miss + Graham was rather crude in mind, though I'm not sure I + wouldn't have stopped at saying <i>young</i>." + </p> + <p> + "No," mildly persisted the old man; "she couldn't be crude in + mind without being crude in looks." + </p> + <p> + "You mean," pursued Colville, smiling, but not wholly + satisfied, "that she hasn't a lovely nature?" + </p> + <p> + "You never can know what sort of nature a young girl has. Her + nature depends so much upon that of the man whose fate she + shares." + </p> + <p> + "The woman is what the man makes her? That is convenient for + the woman, and relieves her of all responsibility." + </p> + <p> + "The man is what the woman makes him, too, but not so much + so. The man was cast into a deep sleep, you + know——" + </p> + <p> + "And the woman was what he dreamed her. I wish she were." + </p> + <p> + "In most cases she is," said Mr. Waters. + </p> + <p> + They did not pursue the matter. The truth that floated in the + old minister's words pleased Colville by its vagueness, and + flattered the man in him by its implication of the man's + superiority. He wanted to say that if Mrs. Bowen were what + the late Mr. Bowen had dreamed her, then the late Mr. Bowen, + when cast into his deep sleep, must have had Lina Ridgely in + his eye. But this seemed to be personalising the fantasy + unwarrantably, and pushing it too far. For like reason he + forbore to say that if Mr. Waters's theory were correct, it + would be better to begin with some one whom nobody else had + dreamed before; then you could be sure at least of not having + a wife to somebody else's mind rather than your own. Once on + his way to Palazzo Pinti, he stopped, arrested by a thought + that had not occurred to him before in relation to what Mr. + Waters had been saying, and then pushed on with the sense of + security which is the compensation the possession of the + initiative brings to our sex along with many + responsibilities. In the enjoyment of this, no man stops to + consider the other side, which must wait his initiative, + however they mean to meet it. + </p> + <p> + In the Por San Maria Colville found masks and dominoes + filling the shop windows and dangling from the doors. A devil + in red and a clown in white crossed the way in front of him + from an intersecting street; several children in pretty + masquerading dresses flashed in and out among the crowd. He + hurried to the Lung' Arno, and reached the palace where Mrs. + Bowen lived, with these holiday sights fresh in his mind. + Imogene turned to meet him at the door of the apartment, + running from the window where she had left Effie Bowen still + gazing. + </p> + <p> + "We saw you coming," she said gaily, without waiting to + exchange formal greetings. "We didn't know at first but it + might; be somebody else disguised as you. We've been watching + the maskers go by. Isn't it exciting?" + </p> + <p> + "Awfully," said Colville, going to the window with her, and + putting his arm on Effie's shoulder, where she knelt in a + chair looking out. "What have you seen?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, only two Spanish students with mandolins," said Imogene; + "but you can see they're <i>beginning</i> to come." + </p> + <p> + "They'll stop now," murmured Effie, with gentle + disappointment; "it's commencing to rain." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, too bad!" wailed the young girl. But just then two + mediaeval men-at-arms came in sight, carrying umbrellas. + "Isn't that too delicious? Umbrellas and chain-armour!" + </p> + <p> + "You can't expect them to let their chain-armour get rusty," + said Colville. "You ought to have been with + me—minstrels in scale-armour, Florentines of + Savonarola's times, nuns, clowns, demons, fairies—no + end to them." + </p> + <p> + "It's very well saying we ought to have been with you; but we + can't go anywhere alone." + </p> + <p> + "I didn't say alone," said Colville. "Don't you think Mrs. + Bowen would trust you with me to see these Carnival + beginnings?" He had not meant at all to do anything of this + kind, but that had not prevented his doing it. + </p> + <p> + "How do we know, when she hasn't been asked?" said Imogene, + with a touch of burlesque dolor, such as makes a dignified + girl enchanting, when she permits it to herself. She took + Effie's hand in hers, the child having faced round from the + window, and stood smoothing it, with her lovely head + pathetically tilted on one side. + </p> + <p> + "What haven't I been asked yet?" demanded Mrs. Bowen, coming + lightly toward them from a door at the side of the + <i>salon</i>. She gave her hand to Colville with the + prettiest grace, and a cordiality that brought a flush to her + cheek. There had really been nothing between them but a + little unreasoned coolness, if it were even so much as that; + say rather a dryness, aggravated by time and absence, and + now, as friends do, after a thing of that kind, they were + suddenly glad to be good to each other. + </p> + <p> + "Why, you haven't been asked how you have been this long + time," said Colville. + </p> + <p> + "I have been wanting to tell you for a whole week," returned + Mrs. Bowen, seating the rest and taking a chair for herself. + "Where have you been?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, shut up in my cell at Hotel d'Atene, writing a short + history of the Florentine people for Miss Effie." + </p> + <p> + "Effie, take Mr. Colville's hat," said her mother. "We're + going to make you stay to lunch," she explained to him. + </p> + <p> + "Is that so?" he asked, with an effect of polite curiosity. + </p> + <p> + "Yes." Imogene softly clapped her hands, unseen by Mrs. + Bowen, for Colville's instruction that all was going well. If + it delights women to pet an undangerous friend of our sex, to + use him like one of themselves, there are no words to paint + the soft and flattered content with which his spirit purrs + under their caresses. "You must have nearly finished the + history," added Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + "Well, I could have finished it," said Colville, "if I had + only begun it. You see, writing a short history of the + Florentine people is such quick work that you have to be + careful how you actually put pen to paper, or you're through + with it before you've had any fun out of it." + </p> + <p> + "I think Effie will like to read that kind of history," said + her mother. + </p> + <p> + The child hung her head, and would not look at Colville; she + was still shy with him; his absence must have seemed longer + to a child, of course. + </p> + <p> + At lunch they talked of the Carnival sights that had begun to + appear. He told of his call upon Mr. Waters, and of the old + minister's purpose to see all he could of the Carnival in + order to judge intelligently of Savonarola's opposition to + it. + </p> + <p> + "Mr. Waters is a very good man," said Mrs. Bowen, with the + air of not meaning to approve him quite, nor yet to let any + notion of his be made fun of in her presence. "But for my + part I wish there were not going to be any Carnival; the city + will be in such an uproar for the next two weeks." + </p> + <p> + "O Mrs. Bowen!" cried Imogene reproachfully; Effie looked at + her mother in apparent anxiety lest she should be meaning to + put forth an unquestionable power and stop the Carnival. + </p> + <p> + "The last Carnival, I thought there was never going to be any + end to it; I was so glad when Lent came." + </p> + <p> + "Glad when <i>Lent</i> came!" breathed Imogene, in + astonishment; but she ventured upon nothing more + insubordinate, and Colville admired to see this spirited girl + as subject to Mrs. Bowen as her own child. There is no reason + why one woman should establish another woman over her, but + nearly all women do it in one sort or another, from love of a + voluntary submission, or from a fear of their own ignorance, + if they are younger and more inexperienced than their lieges. + Neither the one passion nor the other seems to reduce them to + a like passivity as regards their husbands. They must + apparently have a fetish of their own sex. Colville could see + that Imogene obeyed Mrs. Bowen not only as a + <i>protégée</i> but as a devotee. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I suppose <i>you</i> will have to go through it all," + said Mrs. Bowen, in reward of the girl's acquiescence. + </p> + <p> + "You're rather out of the way of it up here," said Colville. + "You had better let me go about with the young + ladies—if you can trust them to the care of an old + fellow like me." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I don't think you're so very old, at all times," replied + Mrs. Bowen, with a peculiar look, whether indulgent or + reproachful he could not quite make out. + </p> + <p> + But he replied, boldly, in his turn: "I have certainly my + moments of being young still; I don't deny it. There's always + a danger of their occurrence." + </p> + <p> + "I was thinking," said Mrs. Bowen, with a graceful effect of + not listening, "that you would let me go too. It would be + quite like old times." + </p> + <p> + "Only too much honour and pleasure," returned Colville, "if + you will leave out the old times. I'm not particular about + having them along." Mrs. Bowen joined in laughing at the + joke, which they had to themselves. "I was only consulting an + explicit abhorrence of yours in not asking you to go at + first," he explained. + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes; I understand that." + </p> + <p> + The excellence of the whole arrangement seemed to grow upon + Mrs. Bowen. "Of course," she said, "Imogene ought to see all + she can of the Carnival. She may not have another chance, and + perhaps if she had, <i>he</i> wouldn't consent." + </p> + <p> + "I'll engage to get <i>his</i> consent," said the girl. "What + I was afraid of was that I couldn't get yours, Mrs. Bowen." + </p> + <p> + "Am I so severe as that?" asked Mrs. Bowen softly. + </p> + <p> + "Quite," replied Imogene. + </p> + <p> + "Perhaps," thought Colville, "it isn't always silent + submission." + </p> + <p> + For no very good reason that any one could give, the Carnival + that year was not a brilliant one. Colville's party seemed to + be always meeting the same maskers on the street, and the + maskers did not greatly increase in numbers. There were a few + more of them after nightfall, but they were then a little + more bacchanal, and he felt it was better that the ladies had + gone home by that time. In the pursuit of the tempered + pleasure of looking up the maskers he was able to make the + reflection that their fantastic and vivid dresses sympathised + in a striking way with the architecture of the city, and gave + him an effect of Florence which he could not otherwise have + had. There came by and by a little attempt at a <i>corso</i> + in Via Cerratani and Via Tornabuoni. There were some masks in + carriages, and from one they actually threw plaster + <i>confetti</i>; half a dozen bare-legged boys ran before and + beat one another with bladders, Some people, but not many, + watched the show from the windows, and the footways were + crowded. + </p> + <p> + Having proposed that they should see the Carnival together, + Colville had made himself responsible for it to the Bowen + household. Imogene said, "Well is this the famous Carnival of + Florence?" + </p> + <p> + "It certainly doesn't compare with the Carnival last year," + said Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + "Your reproach is just, Mrs. Bowen," he acknowledged. "I've + managed it badly. But you know I've been out of practice a + great while there in Des Vaches." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, poor Mr. Colville!" cried Imogene. "He isn't altogether + to blame." + </p> + <p> + "I don't know," said Mrs. Bowen, humouring the joke in her + turn. "It seems to me that if he had consulted us a little + earlier, he might have done better." + </p> + <p> + He drove home with the ladies, and Mrs. Bowen made him stay + to tea. As if she felt that he needed to be consoled for the + failure of his Carnival, she was especially indulgent with + him. She played to him on the piano some of the songs that + were in fashion when they were in Florence together before. + </p> + <p> + Imogene had never heard them; she had heard her mother speak + of them. One or two of them were negro songs, such as very + pretty young ladies used to sing without harm to themselves + or offence to others; but Imogene decided that they were + rather rowdy. "Dear me, Mrs. Bowen! Did <i>you</i> sing such + songs? You wouldn't let Effie!" + </p> + <p> + "No, I wouldn't let Effie. The times are changed. I wouldn't + let Effie go to the theatre alone with a young gentleman." + </p> + <p> + "The times are changed for the worse," Colville began. "What + harm ever came to a young man from a young lady's going alone + to the theatre with him?" + </p> + <p> + He stayed till the candles were brought in, and then went + away only because, as he said, they had not asked him to stay + to dinner. + </p> + <p> + He came nearly every day, upon one pretext or another, and he + met them oftener than that at the teas and on the days of + other ladies in Florence; for he was finding the busy + idleness of the life very pleasant, and he went everywhere. + He formed the habit of carrying flowers to the Palazzo Pinti, + excusing himself on the ground that they were so cheap and so + abundant as to be impersonal. He brought violets to Effie and + roses to Imogene; to Mrs. Bowen he always brought a bunch of + the huge purple anemones which grow so abundantly all winter + long about Florence. "I wonder why <i>purple</i> anemones?" + he asked her one day in presenting them to her. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, it is quite time I should be wearing purple," she said + gently. + </p> + <p> + "Ah, Mrs. Bowen!" he reproached her. "Why do I bring purple + violets to Miss Effie?" + </p> + <p> + "You must ask Effie!" said Mrs. Bowen, with a laugh. + </p> + <p> + After that he stayed away forty-eight hours, and then + appeared with a bunch of the red anemones, as large as + tulips, which light up the meadow grass when it begins to + stir from its torpor in the spring. "They grew on purpose to + set me right with you," he said, "and I saw them when I was + in the country." + </p> + <p> + It was a little triumph for him, which she celebrated by + putting them in a vase on her table, and telling people who + exclaimed over them that they were some Mr. Colville gathered + in the country. He enjoyed his privileges at her house with + the futureless satisfaction of a man. He liked to go about + with the Bowens; he was seen with the ladies driving and + walking, in most of their promenades. He directed their + visits to the churches and the galleries; he was fond of + strolling about with Effie's daintily-gloved little hand in + his. He took her to Giocosa's and treated her to ices; he let + her choose from the confectioner's prettiest caprices in + candy; he was allowed to bring the child presents in his + pockets. Perhaps he was not as conscientious as he might have + been in his behaviour with the little girl. He did what he + could to spoil her, or at least to relax the severity of the + training she had received; he liked to see the struggle that + went on in the mother's mind against this, and then the other + struggle with which she overcame her opposition to it. The + worst he did was to teach Effie some picturesque Western + phrases, which she used with innocent effectiveness; she + committed the crimes against convention which he taught her + with all the conventional elegance of her training. The most + that he ever gained for her were some concessions in going + out in weather that her mother thought unfit, or sitting up + for half-hours after her bed-time. He ordered books for her + from Goodban's, and it was Colville now, and not the Rev. Mr. + Morton, who read poetry aloud to the ladies on afternoons + when Mrs. Bowen gave orders that she and Miss Graham should + be denied to all other comers. + </p> + <p> + It was an intimacy; and society in Florence is not blind, and + especially it is not dumb. The old lady who had celebrated + Mrs. Bowen to him the first night at Palazzo Pinti led a life + of active questions as to what was the supreme attraction to + Colville there, and she referred her doubt to every friend + with whom she drank tea. She philosophised the situation very + scientifically, and if not very conclusively, how few are the + absolute conclusions of science upon any point! + </p> + <p> + "He is a bachelor, and there is a natural affinity between + bachelors and widows—much more than if he were a + widower too. If he were a widower I should say it was + undoubtedly mademoiselle. If he were a little <i>bit</i> + younger, I should have no doubt it was madame; but men of + that age have such an ambition to marry young girls! I + suppose that they think it proves they are not so very old, + after all. And certainly he isn't too old to marry. If he + were wise—which he probably isn't, if he's like other + men in such matters—there wouldn't be any question + about Mrs. Bowen. Pretty creature! And so much sense! Too + much for him. Ah, my dear, how we are wasted upon that sex!" + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen herself treated the affair with masterly + frankness. More than once in varying phrase, she said: "You + are very good to give us so much of your time, Mr. Colville, + and I won't pretend I don't know it. You're helping me out + with a very hazardous experiment. When I undertook to see + Imogene through a winter in Florence, I didn't reflect what a + very gay time girls have at home, in Western towns + especially. But I haven't heard her breathe Buffalo once. And + I'm sure it's doing her a great deal of good here. She's + naturally got a very good mind; she's very ambitious to be + cultivated. She's read a good deal, and she's anxious to know + history and art; and your advice and criticism are the + greatest possible advantage to her." + </p> + <p> + "Thank you," said Colville, with a fine, remote + dissatisfaction. "I supposed I was merely enjoying myself." + </p> + <p> + He had lately begun to haunt his banker's for information in + regard to the Carnival balls, with the hope that something + might be made out of them. + </p> + <p> + But either there were to be no great Carnival balls, or it + was a mistake to suppose that his banker ought to know about + them. Colville went experimentally to one of the people's + balls at a minor theatre, which he found advertised on the + house walls. At half-past ten the dancing had not begun, but + the masks were arriving; young women in gay silks and dirty + white gloves; men in women's dresses, with enormous hands; + girls as pages; clowns, pantaloons, old women, and the like. + They were all very good-humoured; the men, who far + outnumbered the women, danced contentedly together. Colville + liked two cavalry soldiers who waltzed with each other for an + hour, and then went off to a battery on exhibition in the + pit, and had as much electricity as they could hold. He liked + also two young citizens who danced together as long as he + stayed, and did not leave off even for electrical + refreshment. He came away at midnight, pushing out of the + theatre through a crowd of people at the door, some of whom + were tipsy. This certainly would not have done for the + ladies, though the people were civilly tipsy. + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p><a name="IX"><!--Marker--></a> + <h2> + IX + </h2><br> + <br> + + <p> + The next morning Paolo, when he brought up Colville's + breakfast, brought the news that there was to be a veglione + at the Pergola Theatre. This news revived Colville's courage. + "Paolo," he said, "you ought to open a banking-house." Paolo + was used to being joked by foreigners who could not speak + Italian very well; he smiled as if he understood. + </p> + <p> + The banker had his astute doubts of Paolo's intelligence; the + banker in Europe doubts all news not originating in his + house; but after a day or two the advertisements in the + newspapers carried conviction even to the banker. + </p> + <p> + When Colville went to the ladies with news of the veglione, + he found that they had already heard of it. "Should you like + to go?" he asked Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + "I don't know. What do you think?" she asked in turn. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, it's for you to do the thinking. I only know what I + want." + </p> + <p> + Imogene said nothing, while she watched the internal debate + as it expressed itself in Mrs. Bowen's face. + </p> + <p> + "People go in boxes," she said thoughtfully; "but you would + feel that a box wasn't the same thing exactly?" + </p> + <p> + "<i>We</i> went on the floor," suggested Colville. + </p> + <p> + "It was very different then. And, besides, Mrs. Finlay had + absolutely <i>no</i> sense of propriety." When a woman has + explicitly condemned a given action, she apparently gathers + courage for its commission under a little different + conditions. "Of course, if we went upon the floor, I + shouldn't wish it to be known at all, though foreigners can + do almost anything they like." + </p> + <p> + "Really," said Colville, "when it comes to that, I don't see + any harm in it." + </p> + <p> + "And you say go?" + </p> + <p> + "I say whatever you say." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen looked from him to Imogene. "I don't either," she + said finally, and they understood that she meant the harm + which he had not seen. + </p> + <p> + "Which of us has been so good as to deserve this?" asked + Colville. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, you have all been good," she said. "We shall go in masks + and dominoes," she continued. "Nothing will happen, and who + should know us if anything did?" They had received tickets to + the great Borghese ball, which is still a fashionable and + desired event of the Carnival to foreigners in Florence; but + their preconceptions of the veglione threw into the shade the + entertainment which the gentlemen of Florence offered to + favoured sojourners. + </p> + <p> + "Come," said Mrs. Bowen, "you must go with us and help us + choose our dominoes." + </p> + <p> + A prudent woman does not do an imprudent thing by halves. + Effie was to be allowed to go to the veglione too, and she + went with them to the shop where they were to hire their + dominoes. It would be so much more fun, Mrs. Bowen said, to + choose the dresses in the shop than to have them sent home + for you to look at. Effie was to be in black; Imogene was to + have a light blue domino, and Mrs. Bowen chose a purple one; + even where their faces were not to be seen they considered + their complexions in choosing the colours. If you happened to + find a friend, and wanted to unmask, you would not want to + look horrid. The shop people took the vividest interest in it + all, as if it were a new thing to them, and these were the + first foreigners they had ever served with masks and + dominoes. They made Mrs. Bowen and Imogene go into an inner + room and come out for the mystification of Colville, hulking + about in the front shop with his mask and domino on. + </p> + <p> + "Which is which?" the ladies both challenged him, in the + mask's conventional falsetto, when they came out. + </p> + <p> + With a man's severe logic he distinguished them according to + their silks, but there had been time for them to think of + changing, and they took off their masks to laugh in his face. + </p> + <p> + They fluttered so airily about among the pendent masks and + dominoes, from which they shook a ghostly perfume of old + carnivals, that his heart leaped. + </p> + <p> + "Ah, you'll never be so fascinating again!" he cried. He + wanted to take them in his arms, they were both so delicious; + a man has still only that primitive way of expressing his + supreme satisfaction in women. "Now, which am I?" he demanded + of them, and that made them laugh again. He had really put + his arm about Effie. + </p> + <p> + "Do you think you will know your papa at the veglione?" asked + one of the shop-women, with a mounting interest in the + amiable family party. + </p> + <p> + They all laughed; the natural mistake seemed particularly + droll to Imogene. + </p> + <p> + "Come," cried Mrs. Bowen; "it's time we should be going." + </p> + <p> + That was true; they had passed so long a time in the shop + that they did not feel justified in seriously attempting to + beat down the price of their dresses. They took them at the + first price. The woman said with reason that it was Carnival, + and she could get her price for the things. + </p> + <p> + They went to the veglione at eleven, the ladies calling for + Colville, as before, in Mrs. Bowen's carriage. He felt rather + sheepish, coming out of his room in his mask and domino, but + the corridors of the hotel were empty, and for the most part + dark; there was no one up but the porter, who wished him a + pleasant time in as matter-of-fact fashion as if he were + going out to an evening party in his dress coat. His spirits + mounted in the atmosphere of adventure which the ladies + diffused about them in the carriage; Effie Bowen laughed + aloud when he entered, in childish gaiety of heart. + </p> + <p> + The narrow streets roared with the wheels of cabs and + carriages coming and going; the street before the theatre was + so packed that it was some time before they could reach the + door. Masks were passing in and out; the nervous joy of the + ladies expressed itself in a deep-drawn quivering sigh. Their + carriage door was opened by a servant of the theatre, who + wished them a pleasant veglione, and the next moment they + were in the crowded vestibule, where they paused a moment, to + let Imogene and Effie really feel that they were part of a + masquerade. + </p> + <p> + "Now, keep all together," said Mrs. Bowen, as they passed + through the inner door of the vestibule, and the brilliantly + lighted theatre flashed its colours and splendours upon them. + The floor of the pit had been levelled to that of the stage, + which, stripped of the scenic apparatus, opened vaster spaces + for the motley crew already eddying over it in the waltz. The + boxes, tier over tier, blazed with the light of candelabra + which added their sparkle to that of the gas jets. + </p> + <p> + "You and Effie go before," said Mrs. Bowen to Imogene. She + made them take hands like children, and mechanically passed + her own hand through Colville's arm. + </p> + <p> + A mask in red from head to foot attached himself to the + party, and began to make love to her in excellent pantomime. + </p> + <p> + Colville was annoyed. He asked her if he should tell the + fellow to take himself off. + </p> + <p> + "Not on any account!" she answered. "It's perfectly + delightful. It wouldn't be the veglione without it. Did you + ever see such good acting?" + </p> + <p> + "I don't think it's remarkable for anything but its fervour," + said Colville. + </p> + <p> + "I should like to see you making love to some lady," she + rejoined mischievously. + </p> + <p> + "I will make love to you, if you like," he said, but he felt + in an instant that his joke was in bad taste. + </p> + <p> + They went the round of the theatre. "That is Prince Strozzi, + Imogene," said Mrs. Bowen, leaning forward to whisper to the + girl. She pointed out other people of historic and + aristocratic names in the boxes, where there was a democracy + of beauty among the ladies, all painted and powdered to the + same marquise effect. + </p> + <p> + On the floor were gentlemen in evening dress, without masks, + and here and there ladies waltzing, who had masks but no + dominoes. But for the most part people were in costume; the + theatre flushed and flowered in gay variety of tint that + teased the eye with its flow through the dance. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen had circumscribed the adventure so as to exclude + dancing from it. Imogene was not to dance. One might go to + the veglione and look on from a box; if one ventured further + and went on the floor, decidedly one was not to dance. + </p> + <p> + This was thoroughly understood beforehand, and there were to + be no petitions or murmurs at the theatre. They found a quiet + corner, and sat down to look on. + </p> + <p> + The mask in red followed, and took his place at a little + distance, where, whenever Mrs. Bowen looked that way, he + continued to protest his passion. + </p> + <p> + "You're sure he doesn't bore you?" suggested Colville. + </p> + <p> + "No, indeed. He's very amusing." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, all right!" + </p> + <p> + The waltz ceased; the whirling and winding confusion broke + into an irregular streaming hither and thither, up and down. + They began to pick out costumes and characters that + interested them. Clowns in white, with big noses, and + harlequins in their motley, with flat black masks, abounded. + There were some admirable grasshoppers in green, with long + antennae quivering from their foreheads. Two or three + Mephistos reddened through the crowd. Several knights in + armour got about with difficulty, apparently burdened by + their greaves and breastplates. + </p> + <p> + A group of leaping and dancing masks gathered around a young + man in evening dress, with long hair, who stood leaning + against a pillar near them, and who underwent their mockeries + with a smile of patience, half amused, half tormented. + </p> + <p> + When they grew tired of baiting him, and were looking about + for other prey, the red mask redoubled his show of devotion + to Mrs. Bowen, and the other masks began to flock round and + approve. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, now," she said, with a little embarrassed laugh, in + which there was no displeasure, "I think you may ask him to + go away. But don't be harsh with him," she added, at a + brusque movement which Colville made toward the mask. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, why should I be harsh with him? We're not rivals." This + was not in good taste either, Colville felt. "Besides, I'm an + Italian too," he said, to retrieve himself. He made a few + paces toward the mask, and said in a low tone, with gentle + suggestion, "Madame finds herself a little incommoded." + </p> + <p> + The mask threw himself into an attitude of burlesque despair, + bowed low with his hand on his heart, in token of submission, + and vanished into the crowd. The rest dispersed with cries of + applause. + </p> + <p> + "How very prettily you did it, both of you!" said Mrs. Bowen. + "I begin to believe you are an Italian, Mr. Colville. I shall + be afraid of you." + </p> + <p> + "You weren't afraid of him." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, he was a real Italian." + </p> + <p> + "It seems to me that mamma is getting all the good of the + veglione," said Effie, in a plaintive murmur. The + well-disciplined child must have suffered deeply before she + lifted this seditious voice. + </p> + <p> + "Why, so I am, Effie," answered her mother, "and I don't + think it's fair myself. What shall we do about it?" + </p> + <p> + "I should like something to eat," said the child. + </p> + <p> + "So should I," said Colville. "That's reparation your mother + owes us all. Let's make her take us and get us something. + Wouldn't you like an ice, Miss Graham?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes, an <i>ice</i>," said Imogene, with an effect of adding, + "Nothing more for worlds," that made Colville laugh. She rose + slowly, like one in a dream, and cast a look as impassioned + as a look could be made through a mask on the scene she was + leaving behind her. The band was playing a waltz again, and + the wide floor swam with circling couples. + </p> + <p> + The corridor where the tables were set was thronged with + people, who were drinking beer and eating cold beef and boned + turkey and slices of huge round sausages. "Oh, how <i>can</i> + they?" cried the girl, shuddering. + </p> + <p> + "I didn't know you were so ethereal-minded about these + things," said Colville. "I thought you didn't object to the + salad at Madame Uccelli's." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, but at the veglione!" breathed the girl for all answer. + He laughed again, but Mrs. Bowen did not laugh with him; he + wondered why. + </p> + <p> + When they returned to their corner in the theatre they found + a mask in a black domino there, who made place for them, and + remained standing near. They began talking freely and + audibly, as English-speaking people incorrigibly do in Italy, + where their tongue is all but the language of the country. + </p> + <p> + "Really," said Colville, "I think I shall stifle in this + mask. If you ladies will do what you can to surround me and + keep me secret, I'll take it off a moment." + </p> + <p> + "I believe I will join you, Mr. Colville," said the mask near + them. He pushed up his little visor of silk, and discovered + the mild, benignant features of Mr. Waters. + </p> + <p> + "Bless my soul!" cried Colville. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen was apparently too much shocked to say anything. + </p> + <p> + "You didn't expect to meet me here?" asked the old man, as if + otherwise it should be the most natural thing in the world. + After that they could only unite in suppressing their + astonishment. "It's extremely interesting," he went on, + "extremely! I've been here ever since the exercises began, + and I have not only been very greatly amused, but greatly + instructed. It seems to me the key to a great many anomalies + in the history of this wonderful people." + </p> + <p> + If Mr. Waters took this philosophical tone about the + Carnival, it was not possible for Colville to take any other. + </p> + <p> + "And have you been able to divine from what you have seen + here," he asked gravely, "the grounds of Savonarola's + objection to the Carnival?" + </p> + <p> + "Not at all," said the old man promptly. "I have seen nothing + but the most harmless gaiety throughout the evening." + </p> + <p> + Colville hung his head. He remembered reading once in a + passage from Swedenborg, that the most celestial angels had + scarcely any power of perceiving evil. + </p> + <p> + "Why aren't you young people dancing?" asked Mr. Waters, in a + cheerful general way, of Mrs. Bowen's party. + </p> + <p> + Colville was glad to break the silence. "Mrs. Bowen doesn't + approve of dancing at vegliones." + </p> + <p> + "No?—why not?" inquired the old man, with invincible + simplicity. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen smiled her pretty, small smile below her mask. + </p> + <p> + "The company is apt to be rather mixed," she said quietly. + </p> + <p> + "Yes," pursued Mr. Waters; "but you could dance with one + another. The company seems very well behaved." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, quite so," Mrs. Bowen assented. + </p> + <p> + "Shortly after I came," said Mr. Waters, "one of the masks + asked me to dance. I was really sorry that my age and + traditions forbade my doing so. I tried to explain, but I'm + afraid I didn't make myself quite clear." + </p> + <p> + "Probably it passed for a joke with her," said Colville, in + order to say something. + </p> + <p> + "Ah, very likely; but I shall always feel that my impressions + of the were a young man like you——" + </p> + <p> + Imogens turned and looked at Colville through the eye-holes + of her mask; even in that sort of isolation he thought her + eyes expressed surprise. + </p> + <p> + "It never occurred to you before that I was a young man," he + suggested gravely. + </p> + <p> + She did not reply. + </p> + <p> + After a little interval, "Imogene," asked Mrs. Bowen, "would + you like to dance?" + </p> + <p> + Colville was astonished. "The veglione has gone to your head, + Mrs. Bowen," he tacitly made his comment. She had spoken to + Imogene, but she glanced at him as if she expected him to be + grateful to her for this stroke of liberality. + </p> + <p> + "What would be the use?" returned the girl. + </p> + <p> + Colville rose. "After my performance in the Lancers, I can't + expect you to believe me; but I really do know how to waltz." + He had but to extend his arms, and she was hanging upon his + shoulder, and they were whirling away through a long orbit of + delight to the girl. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, why have you let me do you such injustice?" she murmured + intensely. "I never shall forgive myself." + </p> + <p> + "It grieved me that you shouldn't have divined that I was + really a magnificent dancer in disguise, but I bore it as + best I could," said Colville, really amused at her + seriousness. "Perhaps you'll find out after a while that I'm + not an old fellow either, but only a 'Lost Youth,'" + </p> + <p> + "Hush," she said; "I don't like to hear you talk so." + </p> + <p> + "How?" + </p> + <p> + "About—age!" she answered. "It makes me + feel——- Don't to-night!" + </p> + <p> + Colville laughed. "It isn't a fact that my blinking is going + to change materially. You had better make the most of me as a + lost youth. I'm old enough to be two of them." + </p> + <p> + She did not answer, and as they wound up and down through the + other orbing couples, he remembered the veglione of seventeen + years before, when he had dreamed through the waltz with the + girl who jilted him; she was very docile and submissive that + night; he believed afterward that if he had spoken frankly + then, she would not have refused him. But he had veiled his + passion in words and phrases that, taken in themselves, had + no meaning—that neither committed him nor claimed her. + He could not help it; he had not the courage at any moment to + risk the loss of her for ever, till it was too late, till he + must lose her. + </p> + <p> + "Do you believe in pre-existence?" he demanded of Imogene. + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes!" she flashed back. "This very instant it was just as + if I had been here before, long ago." + </p> + <p> + "Dancing with me?" + </p> + <p> + "With you? Yes—yes—I think so." + </p> + <p> + He had lived long enough to know that she was making herself + believe what she said, and that she had not lived long enough + to know this. + </p> + <p> + "Then you remember what I said to you—tried to say to + you—that night?" Through one of those psychological + juggles which we all practise with ourselves at times, it + amused him, it charmed him, to find her striving to realise + this past. + </p> + <p> + "No; it was so long ago? What was it?" she whispered + dreamily. + </p> + <p> + A turn of the waltz brought them near Mrs. Bowen; her mask + seemed to wear a dumb reproach. + </p> + <p> + He began to be weary; one of the differences between youth + and later life is that the latter wearies so soon of any + given emotion. + </p> + <p> + "Ah, I can't remember, either! Aren't you getting rather + tired of the waltz and me?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh no; go on!" she deeply murmured. "Try to remember." + </p> + <p> + The long, pulsating stream of the music broke and fell. The + dancers crookedly dispersed in wandering lines. She took his + arm; he felt her heart leap against it; those innocent, + trustful throbs upbraided him. At the same time his own heart + beat with a sort of fond, protecting tenderness; he felt the + witchery of his power to make this young, radiant, and + beautiful creature hang flattered and bewildered on his talk; + he liked the compassionate worship with which his tacit + confidence had inspired her, even while he was not without + some satirical sense of the crude sort of heart-broken hero + he must be in the fancy of a girl of her age. + </p> + <p> + "Let us go and walk in the corridor a moment," he said. But + they walked there till the alluring melancholy music of the + waltz began again. In a mutual caprice, they rejoined the + dance. + </p> + <p> + It came into his head to ask, "Who is <i>he</i>?" and as he + had got past denying himself anything, he asked it. + </p> + <p> + "He? What he?" + </p> + <p> + "He that Mrs. Bowen thought might object to your seeing the + Carnival?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh!—oh yes! That was the not impossible he." + </p> + <p> + "Is that all?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes." + </p> + <p> + "Then he's not even the not improbable he?" + </p> + <p> + "No, indeed." + </p> + <p> + They waltzed in silence. Then, "Why did you ask me that?" she + murmured. + </p> + <p> + "I don't know. Was it such a strange question?" + </p> + <p> + "I don't know. You ought to." + </p> + <p> + "Yes, if it was wrong, I'm old enough to know better." + </p> + <p> + "You promised not to say 'old' any more." + </p> + <p> + "Then I suppose I mustn't. But you mustn't get me to ignore + it, and then laugh at me for it." + </p> + <p> + "Oh!" she reproached him, "you think I could do that?" + </p> + <p> + "You could if it was you who were here with me once before." + </p> + <p> + "Then I know I wasn't." + </p> + <p> + Again they were silent, and it was he who spoke first. "I + wish you would tell me why you object to the interdicted + topic?" + </p> + <p> + "Because—because I like every time to be perfect in + itself." + </p> + <p> + "Oh! And this wouldn't be perfect in itself if I + were—not so young as some people?" + </p> + <p> + "I didn't mean that. No; but if you didn't mention it, no one + else would think of it or care for it." + </p> + <p> + "Did any one ever accuse you of flattering, Miss Graham?" + </p> + <p> + "Not till now. And you are unjust." + </p> + <p> + "Well, I withdraw the accusation." + </p> + <p> + "And will you ever pretend such a thing again?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, never!" + </p> + <p> + "Then I have your promise." + </p> + <p> + The talk was light word-play, such as depends upon the + talker's own mood for its point or its pointlessness. Between + two young people of equal years it might have had meanings to + penetrate, to sigh over, to question. Colville found it + delicious to be pursued by the ingenuous fervour of this + young girl, eager to vindicate her sincerity in prohibiting + him from his own ironical depreciation. Apparently, she had a + sentimental mission of which he was the object; he was to be + convinced that he was unnecessarily morbid; he was to be + cheered up, to be kept in heart. + </p> + <p> + "I must believe in you after this," he said, with a smile + which his mask hid. + </p> + <p> + "Thanks," she breathed. It seemed to him that her hand closed + convulsively upon his in their light clasp. + </p> + <p> + The pressure sent a real pang to his heart. It forced her + name from his lips. "Imogene! Ah, I've no right to call you + that." + </p> + <p> + "Yes." + </p> + <p> + "From this out I promise to be twenty years younger. But no + one is to know it but you. Do you think you will know it? I + shouldn't like to keep the secret to myself altogether." + </p> + <p> + "No; I will help you. It shall be <i>our</i> secret." + </p> + <p> + She gave a low laugh of delight. He convinced himself that + she had entered into the light spirit of banter in which he + believed that he was talking. + </p> + <p> + The music ceased again. He whirled her to the seat where he + had left Mrs. Bowen. She was not there, nor the others. + </p> + <p> + Colville felt the meanness of a man who has betrayed his + trust, and his self-contempt was the sharper because the + trust had been as tacit and indefinite as it was generous. + The effect of Mrs. Bowen's absence was as if she had + indignantly flown, and left him to the consequences of his + treachery. + </p> + <p> + He sat down rather blankly with Imogene to wait for her + return; it was the only thing they could do. + </p> + <p> + It had grown very hot. The air was thick with dust. The + lights burned through it as through a fog. + </p> + <p> + "I believe I will take off my mask," she said. "I can + scarcely breathe." + </p> + <p> + "No, no," protested Colville; "that won't do." + </p> + <p> + "I feel faint," she gasped. + </p> + <p> + His heart sank. "Don't," he said incoherently. "Come with me + into the vestibule, and get a breath of air." + </p> + <p> + He had almost to drag her through the crowd, but in the + vestibule she revived, and they returned to their place + again. He did not share the easy content with which she + recognised the continued absence of Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + "Why they must be lost. But isn't it perfect sitting here and + watching the maskers?" + </p> + <p> + "Perfect," said Colville distractedly. + </p> + <p> + "Don't you like to make romances about the different ones?" + </p> + <p> + It was on Colville's tongue to say that he had made all the + romances he wished for that evening, but he only answered, + "Oh, very." + </p> + <p> + "Poor Mrs. Bowen," laughed the girl. "It will be such a joke + on her, with her punctilious notions, getting lost from her + <i>protégée</i> at a Carnival ball! I shall + tell every one." + </p> + <p> + "Oh no, don't," said Colville, in horror that big mask + scarcely concealed. + </p> + <p> + "Why not?" + </p> + <p> + "It wouldn't be at all the thing." + </p> + <p> + "Why, are you becoming Europeanised too?" she demanded. "I + thought you went in for all sorts of unconventionalities. + Recollect your promise. You must be as impulsive as I am." + </p> + <p> + Colville, staring anxiously about in every direction, made + for the first time the reflection that most young girls + probably conform to the proprieties without in the least + knowing why. + </p> + <p> + "Do you think," he asked, in desperation, "that you would be + afraid to be left here a moment while I went about in the + crowd and tried to find them?" + </p> + <p> + "Not at all," she said. But she added, "Don't be gone long." + </p> + <p> + "Oh no," he answered, pulling off his mask. "Be sure not to + move from here on any account." + </p> + <p> + He plunged into the midst of the crowd that buffeted him from + side to side as he struck against its masses. The squeaking + and gibbering masks mocked in their falsetto at his + wild-eyed, naked face thrusting hither and thither among + them. + </p> + <p> + "I saw your lady wife with another gentleman," cried one of + them, in a subtle misinterpretation of the cause of his + distraction. + </p> + <p> + The throng had immensely increased; the clowns and harlequins + ran shrieking up and down, and leaped over one another's + heads. + </p> + <p> + It was useless. He went back to Imogene with a + heart-sickening fear that she too might have vanished. + </p> + <p> + But she was still there. + </p> + <p> + "You ought to have come sooner," she said gaily. "That red + mask has been here again. He looked as if he wanted to make + love to <i>me</i> this time. But he didn't. If you'd been + here you might have asked him where Mrs. Bowen was." + </p> + <p> + Colville sat down. He had done what he could to mend the + matter, and the time had come for philosophical submission. + It was now his duty to keep up Miss Graham's spirits. They + were both Americans, and from the national standpoint he was + simply the young girl's middle-aged bachelor friend. There + was nothing in the situation for him to beat his breast + about. + </p> + <p> + "Well, all that we can do is to wait for them," he said. + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes," she answered easily. "They'll be sure to come back + in the course of time." + </p> + <p> + They waited a half-hour, talking somewhat at random, and + still the others did not come. But the red mask came again. + He approached Colville, and said politely— + </p> + <p> + "<i>La signora è partita.</i>" + </p> + <p> + "The lady gone?" repeated Colville, taking this to be part of + the red mask's joke. + </p> + <p> + "<i>La bambina pareva poco lene.</i>" + </p> + <p> + "The little one not well?" echoed Colville again, rising. + "Are you joking?" + </p> + <p> + The mask made a deep murmur of polite deprecation. "I am not + capable of such a thing in a serious affair. Perhaps you know + me?" he said, taking off his mask, and in further sign of + good faith he gave the name of a painter sufficiently famous + in Florence. + </p> + <p> + "I beg your pardon, and thank you," said Colville. He had no + need to speak to Imogene—, her hand was already + trembling on his arm. + </p> + <p> + They drove home in silence through the white moonlight of the + streets, filled everywhere with the gay voices and figures of + the Carnival. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen met them at the door of her apartment, and + received them with a manner that justly distributed the + responsibility and penalty for their escapade. Colville felt + that a meaner spirit would have wreaked its displeasure upon + the girl alone. She made short, quiet answers to all his + eager inquiries. Most probably it was some childish + indisposition; Effie had been faint. No, he need not go for + the doctor. Mr. Waters had called the doctor, who had just + gone away. There was nothing else that he could do for her. + She dropped her eyes, and in everything but words dismissed + him. She would not even remain with him till he could + decently get himself out of the house. She left Imogene to + receive his adieux, feigning that she heard Effie calling. + </p> + <p> + "I'm—I'm very sorry," faltered the girl, "that we + didn't go back to her at once." + </p> + <p> + "Yes; I was to blame," answered the humiliated hero of her + Carnival dream. The clinging regret with which she kept his + hand at parting scarcely consoled him for what had happened. + </p> + <p> + "I will come round in the morning," he said. "I must know how + Effie is." + </p> + <p> + "Yes; come." + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <h2> + X + </h2> + <p> + Colville went to Palazzo Pinti next day with the feeling that + he was defying Mrs. Bowen. Upon a review of the facts he + could not find himself so very much to blame for the + occurrences of the night before, and he had not been able to + prove to his reason that Mrs. Bowen had resented his + behaviour. She had not made a scene of any sort when he came + in with Imogene; it was natural that she should excuse + herself, and should wish to be with her sick child: she had + done really nothing. But when a woman has done nothing she + fills the soul of the man whose conscience troubles him with + an instinctive apprehension. There is then no safety, his + nerves tell him, except in bringing the affair, whatever it + is, to an early issue—in having it out with her. + Colville subdued the cowardly impulse of his own heart, which + would have deceived him with the suggestion that Mrs. Bowen + might be occupied with Effie, and it would be better to ask + for Miss Graham. He asked for Mrs. Bowen, and she came in + directly. + </p> + <p> + She smiled in the usual way, and gave her hand, as she always + did; but her hand was cold, and she looked tired, though she + said Effie was quite herself again, and had been asking for + him. "Imogene has been telling her about your adventure last + night, and making her laugh." + </p> + <p> + If it had been Mrs. Bowen's purpose to mystify him, she could + not have done it more thoroughly than by this bold treatment + of the affair. He bent a puzzled gaze upon her. "I'm glad any + of you have found it amusing," he said;—"I confess that + I couldn't let myself off so lightly in regard to it." She + did not reply, and he continued: "The fact is, I don't think + I behaved very well. I abused your kindness to Miss Graham." + </p> + <p> + "Abused my kindness to Miss Graham?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes. When you allowed her to dance at the veglione, I ought + to have considered that you were stretching a point. I ought + to have taken her back to you very soon, instead of tempting + her to go and walk with me in the corridor." + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said Mrs. Bowen. "So it was you who proposed it? + Imogene was afraid that she had. What exemplary young people + you are! The way each of you confesses and assumes all the + blame would leave the severest chaperone without a word." + </p> + <p> + Her gaiety made Colville uncomfortable. He said gravely, + "What I blame myself most for is that I was not there to be + of use to you when Effie——" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, you mustn't think of that at all. Mr. Waters was most + efficient. My admirer in the red mask was close at hand, and + between them they got Effie out without the slightest + disturbance. I fancy most people thought it was a Carnival + joke. Please don't think of that again." + </p> + <p> + Nothing could be politer than all this. + </p> + <p> + "And you won't allow me to punish myself for not being there + to give you even a moral support?" + </p> + <p> + "Certainly not. As I told Imogene, young people will be young + people; and I knew how fond you were of dancing." + </p> + <p> + Though it pierced him, Colville could not help admiring the + neatness of this thrust. "I didn't know you were so ironical, + Mrs. Bowen." + </p> + <p> + "Ironical? Not at all." + </p> + <p> + "Ah! I see I'm not forgiven." + </p> + <p> + "I'm sure I don't know what you mean." + </p> + <p> + Imogene and Effie came in. The child was a little pale, and + willingly let him take her on his knee, and lay her languid + head on his shoulder. The girl had not aged overnight like + himself and Mrs. Bowen; she looked as fresh and strong as + yesterday. + </p> + <p> + "Miss Graham," said Colville, "if a person to whom you had + done a deadly wrong insisted that you hadn't done any wrong + at all, should you consider yourself forgiven?" + </p> + <p> + "It would depend upon the person," said the girl, with + innocent liveliness, recognising the extravagance in his + tone. + </p> + <p> + "Yes," he said, with an affected pensiveness, "so very much + depends upon the person in such a case." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen rose. "Excuse me a moment; I will be back + directly. Don't get up, please," she said, and prevented him + with a quick withdrawal to another room, which left upon his + sense the impression of elegant grace, and a smile and sunny + glance. But neither had any warmth in it. + </p> + <p> + Colville heaved an involuntary sigh. "Do you feel very much + used up?" he asked Imogene. + </p> + <p> + "Not at all," she laughed. "Do you?" + </p> + <p> + "Not in the least. My veglione hasn't ended yet. I'm still + practically at the Pergola. It's easy to keep a thing of that + sort up if you don't sleep after you get home." + </p> + <p> + "Didn't you sleep? I expected to lie awake a long time + thinking it over; but I dropped asleep at once. I suppose I + was very tired. I didn't even dream." + </p> + <p> + "You must have slept hard. You're pretty apt to dream when + you're waking." + </p> + <p> + "How do you know?" + </p> + <p> + "Ah, I've noticed when you've been talking to me. Better not! + It's a bad habit; it gives you false views of things. I + used——" + </p> + <p> + "But you mustn't say you <i>used!</i> That's forbidden now. + Remember your promise!" + </p> + <p> + "My promise? What promise?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, if you've forgotten already." + </p> + <p> + "I remember. But that was last night." + </p> + <p> + "No, no! It was for all time. Why should dreams be so very + misleading? I think there's ever so much in dreams. The most + wonderful thing is the way you make people talk in dreams. It + isn't strange that you should talk yourself, but that other + people should say this and that when you aren't at all + expecting what they say." + </p> + <p> + "That's when you're sleeping. But when you're waking, you + make people say just what you want. And that's why day dreams + are so bad. If you make people say what you want, they + probably don't mean it." + </p> + <p> + "Don't you think so?" + </p> + <p> + "Half the time. Do you ever have day dreams?" he asked Effie, + pressing her cheek against his own. + </p> + <p> + "I don't know what they are," she murmured, with a soft + little note of polite regret for her ignorance, if possibly + it incommoded him. + </p> + <p> + "You will by and by," he said, "and then you must look out + for them. They're particularly bad in this air. I had one of + them in Florence once that lasted three months." + </p> + <p> + "What was it about?" asked the child. + </p> + <p> + Imogene involuntarily bent forward. + </p> + <p> + "Ah, I can't tell you now. She's trying to hear us." + </p> + <p> + "No, no," protested the girl, with a laugh. "I was thinking + of something else." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, we know her, don't we?" he said to the child, with a + playful appeal to that passion for the joint possession of a + mystery which all children have. + </p> + <p> + "We might whisper it," she suggested. + </p> + <p> + "No; better wait for some other time." They were sitting near + a table where a pencil and some loose leaves of paper lay. He + pulled his chair a little closer, and, with the child still + upon his knee, began to scribble and sketch at random. "Ah, + there's San Miniato," he said, with a glance from the window. + "Must get its outline in. You've heard how there came to be a + church up there? No? Well, it shows the sort of man San + Miniato really was. He was one of the early Christians, and + he gave the poor pagans a great deal of trouble. They first + threw him to the wild beasts in the amphitheatre, but the + moment those animals set eyes on him they saw it would be of + no use; they just lay down and died. Very well, then; the + pagans determined to see what effect the axe would have upon + San Miniato: but as soon as they struck off his head he + picked it up, set it back on his shoulders again, waded + across the Arno, walked up the hill, and when he came to a + convenient little oratory up there he knelt down and expired. + Isn't that a pretty good story? It's like fairies, isn't it?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes," whispered the child. + </p> + <p> + "What nonsense!" said Imogene. "You made it up." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, did I? Perhaps I built the church that stands there to + commemorate the fact. It's all in the history of Florence. + Not in all histories; some of them are too proud to put such + stories in, but I'm going to put every one I can find into + the history I'm writing for Effie. San Miniato was beheaded + where the church of Santa Candida stands now, and he walked + all that distance." + </p> + <p> + "Did he have to die when he got to the oratory?" asked the + child, with gentle regret. + </p> + <p> + "It appears so," said Colville, sketching. "He would have + been dead by this time, anyway, you know." + </p> + <p> + "Yes," she reluctantly admitted. + </p> + <p> + "I never quite like those things, either, Effie," he said, + pressing her to him. "There were people cruelly put to death + two or three thousand years ago that I can't help feeling + would be alive yet if they had been justly treated. There are + a good many fairy stories about Florence; perhaps they used + to be true stories; the truth seems to die out of stories + after a while, simply because people stop believing them. + Saint Ambrose of Milan restored the son of his host to life + when he came down here to dedicate the Church of San + Giovanni. Then there was another saint, San Zenobi, who + worked a very pretty miracle after he was dead. They were + carrying his body from the Church of San Giovanni to the + Church of Santa Reparata, and in Piazza San Giovanni his bier + touched a dead elm-tree that stood there, and the tree + instantly sprang into leaf and flower, though it was in the + middle of the winter. A great many people took the leaves + home with them, and a marble pillar was put up there, with a + cross and an elm-tree carved on it. Oh, the case is very well + authenticated." + </p> + <p> + "I shall really begin to think you believe such things," said + Imogene. "Perhaps you <i>are</i> a Catholic." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen returned to the room, and sat down. + </p> + <p> + "There's another fairy story, prettier yet," said Colville, + while the little girl drew a long deep breath of satisfaction + and expectation. "You've heard of the Buondelmonti?" he asked + Imogene. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, it seems to me as if I'd had <i>nothing</i> but the + Buondelmonti dinned into me since I came to Florence!" she + answered in lively despair. + </p> + <p> + "Ah, this happened some centuries before the Buondelmonte + you've been bored with was born. This was Giovanni Gualberto + of the Buondelmonti, and he was riding along one day in 1003, + near the Church of San Miniato, when he met a certain man + named Ugo, who had killed one of his brothers. Gualberto + stopped and drew his sword; Ugo saw no other chance of + escape, and he threw himself face downward on the ground, + with his arms stretched out in the form of the cross. + 'Gualberto, remember Jesus Christ, who died upon the cross + praying for His enemies.' The story says that these words + went to Gualberto's heart; he got down from his horse, and in + sign of pardon lifted his enemy and kissed and embraced him. + Then they went together into the church, and fell on their + knees before the figure of Christ upon the cross, and the + figure bowed its head in sign of approval and pleasure in + Gualberto's noble act of Christian piety." + </p> + <p> + "Beautiful!" murmured the girl; the child only sighed. + </p> + <p> + "Ah, yes; it's an easy matter to pick up one's head from the + ground, and set it back on one's shoulders, or to bring the + dead to life, or to make a tree put forth leaves and flowers + in midwinter; but to melt the heart of a man with forgiveness + in the presence of his enemy—that's a different thing; + <i>that's</i> no fairy story; that's a real miracle; and I + believe this one happened—it's so impossible." + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes, it must have happened," said the girl. + </p> + <p> + "Do you think it's so very hard to forgive, then?" asked Mrs. + Bowen gravely. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, not for ladies," replied Colville. + </p> + <p> + She flushed, and her eyes shone when she glanced at him. + </p> + <p> + "I'm sorry to put you down," he said to the child; "but I + can't take you with me, and I must be going." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen did not ask him to stay to lunch; he thought + afterward that she might have relented as far as that but for + the last little thrust, which he would better have spared. + </p> + <p> + "Effie dear," said her mother, when the door closed upon + Colville, "don't you think you'd better lie down a while? You + look so tired." + </p> + <p> + "Shall I lie down on the sofa here?" + </p> + <p> + "No, on your bed." + </p> + <p> + "Well." + </p> + <p> + "I'll go with you, Effie," said Imogene, "and see that you're + nicely tucked in." + </p> + <p> + When she returned alone, Mrs. Bowen was sitting where she had + left her, and seemed not to have moved. "I think Effie will + drop off to sleep," she said; "she seems drowsy." She sat + down, and after a pensive moment continued, "I wonder what + makes Mr. Colville seem so gloomy." + </p> + <p> + "Does he seem gloomy?" asked Mrs. Bowen unsympathetically. + </p> + <p> + "No, not gloomy exactly. But different from last night. I + wish people could always be the same! He was so gay and full + of spirits; and now he's so self-absorbed. He thinks you're + offended with him, Mrs. Bowen." + </p> + <p> + "I don't think he was very much troubled about it. I only + thought he was flighty from want of sleep. At your age you + don't mind the loss of a night." + </p> + <p> + "Do you think Mr. Colville seems so very old?" asked Imogene + anxiously. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen appeared not to have heard her. She went to the + window and looked out. When she came back, "Isn't it almost + time for you to have a letter from home?" she asked. + </p> + <p> + "Why, no. I had one from mother day before yesterday. What + made you think so?" + </p> + <p> + "Imogene," interrupted Mrs. Bowen, with a sudden excitement + which she tried to control, but which made her lips tremble, + and break a little from her restraint, "you know that I am + here in the place of your mother, to advise you and look + after you in every way?" + </p> + <p> + "Why, yes, Mrs. Bowen," cried the girl, in surprise. + </p> + <p> + "It's a position of great responsibility in regard to a young + lady. I can't have anything to reproach myself with + afterward." + </p> + <p> + "No." + </p> + <p> + "Have I always been kind to you, and considerate of your + rights and your freedom? Have I ever interfered with you in + any way that you think I oughtn't?" + </p> + <p> + "What an idea! You've been loveliness itself, Mrs. Bowen!" + </p> + <p> + "Then I want you to listen to me, and answer me frankly, and + not suspect my motives." + </p> + <p> + "Why, how <i>could</i> I do that?" + </p> + <p> + "Never mind!" cried Mrs. Bowen impatiently, almost angrily. + "People can't help their suspicions! Do you think Mr. Morton + cares for you?" + </p> + <p> + The girl hung her head. + </p> + <p> + "Imogene, answer me!" + </p> + <p> + "I don't know," answered Imogene coldly; "but if you're + troubled about that, Mrs. Bowen, you needn't be; I don't care + anything for Mr. Morton." + </p> + <p> + "If I thought you were becoming interested in any one, it + would be my duty to write to your mother and tell her." + </p> + <p> + "Of course; I should expect you to do it." + </p> + <p> + "And if I saw you becoming interested in any one in a way + that I thought would make you unhappy, it would be my duty to + warn you." + </p> + <p> + "Yes." + </p> + <p> + "Of course, I don't mean that any one would knowingly try to + make you unhappy?" + </p> + <p> + "No." + </p> + <p> + "Men don't go about nowadays trying to break girls' hearts. + But very good men can be thoughtless and selfish." + </p> + <p> + "Yes; I understand that," said Imogene, in a falling accent. + </p> + <p> + "I don't wish to prejudice you against any one. I should + consider it very wrong and wicked. Besides, I don't care to + interfere with you to that degree. You are old enough to see + and judge for yourself." + </p> + <p> + Imogene sat silent, passing her hand across the front of her + dress. The clock ticked audibly from the mantel. + </p> + <p> + "I will not have it left to me!" cried Mrs. Bowen. "It is + hard enough, at any rate. Do you think I like to speak to + you?" + </p> + <p> + "No." + </p> + <p> + "Of course it makes me seem inhospitable, and distrustful, + and detestable." + </p> + <p> + "I never thought of accusing you," said the girl, slowly + lifting her eyes. + </p> + <p> + "I will never, never speak to you of it again," said Mrs. + Bowen, "and from this time forth I insist upon your feeling + just as free as if I hadn't spoken." She trembled upon the + verge of a sob, from which she repelled herself. + </p> + <p> + Imogene sat still, with a sort of serious, bewildered look. + </p> + <p> + "You shall have every proper opportunity of meeting any one + you like." + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes." + </p> + <p> + "And I shall be only too gl-glad to take back everything!" + </p> + <p> + Imogene sat motionless and silent. Mrs. Bowen broke out again + with a sort of violence; the years teach us something of + self-control, perhaps, but they weaken and unstring the + nerves. In this opposition of silence to silence, the woman + of the world was no match for the inexperienced girl. + </p> + <p> + "Have you nothing to say, Imogene?" + </p> + <p> + "I never thought of him in that way at all. I don't know what + to say yet. It—confuses me. I—I can't imagine it. + But if you think that he is trying to amuse + himself——" + </p> + <p> + "I never said that!" + </p> + <p> + "No, I know it." + </p> + <p> + "He likes to make you talk, and to talk with you. But he is + perfectly idle here, and—there is too much difference, + every way. The very good in him makes it the worse. I suppose + that after talking with him every one else seems insipid." + </p> + <p> + "Yes." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen rose and ran suddenly from the room. + </p> + <p> + Imogene remained sitting cold and still. + </p> + <p> + No one had been named since they spoke of Mr. Morton. + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p><a name="XI"><!--Marker--></a> + <h2> + XI + </h2><br> + <br> + + <p> + Colville had not done what he meant in going to Mrs. Bowen's; + in fact, he had done just what he had not meant to do, as he + distinctly perceived in coming away. It was then that in a + luminous retrospect he discovered his motive to have been a + wish to atone to her for behaviour that must have distressed + her, or at least to explain it to her. She had not let him do + this at once; an instant willingness to hear and to condone + was not in a woman's nature; she had to make him feel, by the + infliction of a degree of punishment, that she had suffered. + But before she ended she had made it clear that she was ready + to grant him a tacit pardon, and he had answered with a silly + sarcasm the question that was to have led to peace. He could + not help seeing that throughout the whole Carnival adventure + she had yielded her cherished reluctances to please him, to + show him that she was not stiff or prudish, to convince him + that she would not be a killjoy through her devotion to + conventionalities which she thought he despised. He could not + help seeing that he had abused her delicate generosity, + insulted her subtle concessions. He strolled along down the + Arno, feeling flat and mean, as a man always does after a + contest with a woman in which he has got the victory; our sex + can preserve its self-respect only through defeat in such a + case. It gave him no pleasure to remember that the glamour of + the night before seemed still to rest on Imogene unbroken; + that, indeed, was rather an added pain. He surprised himself + in the midst of his poignant reflections by a yawn. Clearly + the time was past when these ideal troubles could keep him + awake, and there was, after all, a sort of brutal consolation + in the fact. He was forty-one years old, and he was sleepy, + whatever capacity for suffering remained to him. He went to + his hotel to catch a little nap before lunch. When he woke it + was dinner-time. The mists of slumber still hung about him, + and the events of the last forty-eight hours showed vast and + shapelessly threatening through them. + </p> + <p> + When the drama of the <i>table d'hôte</i> reached its + climax of roast chestnuts and butter, he determined to walk + over to San Marco and pay a visit to Mr. Waters. He found the + old minister from Haddam East Village, Massachusetts, + Italianate outwardly in almost ludicrous degree. He wore a + fur-lined overcoat indoors; his feet, cased in thick woollen + shoes, rested on a strip of carpet laid before his table; a + man who had lived for forty years in the pungent atmosphere + of an air-tight stove, succeeding a quarter of a century of + roaring hearth fires, contented himself with the spare heat + of a scaldino, which he held his clasped hands over in the + very Italian manner; the lamp that cast its light on the book + open before him was the classic <i>lucerna</i>, with three + beaks, fed with olive oil. He looked up at his visitor over + his spectacles, without recognising him, till Colville spoke. + Then, after their greeting, "Is it snowing heavily?" he + asked. + </p> + <p> + "It isn't snowing at all. What made you think that?" + </p> + <p> + "Perhaps I was drowsing over my book and dreamed it. We + become very strange and interesting studies to ourselves as + we live along." + </p> + <p> + He took up the metaphysical consideration with the promptness + of a man who has no small-talk, and who speaks of the mind + and soul as if they were the gossip of the neighbourhood. + </p> + <p> + "At times the forty winters that I passed in Haddam East + Village seem like an alien experience, and I find myself + pitying the life I lived there quite as if it were the life + of some one else. It seems incredible that men should still + inhabit such climates." + </p> + <p> + "Then you're not homesick for Haddam East Village?" + </p> + <p> + "Ah! for the good and striving souls there, yes; especially + the souls of some women there. They used to think that it was + I who gave them consolation and spiritual purpose, but it was + they who really imparted it. Women souls—how beautiful + they sometimes are! They seem truly like angelic essences. I + trust that I shall meet them somewhere some time, but it will + never be in Haddam East Village. Yes, I must have been + dreaming when you came in. I thought that I was by my fire + there, and all round over the hills and in the streets the + snow was deep and falling still. How distinctly, he said, + closing his eyes, as artists do in looking at a picture, I + can see the black wavering lines of the walls in the fields + sinking into the drifts! the snow billowed over the graves by + the church where I preached! the banks of snow around the + houses! the white desolation everywhere! I ask myself at + times if the people are still there. Yes, I feel as blessedly + remote from that terrible winter as if I had died away from + it, and were in the weather of heaven." + </p> + <p> + "Then you have no reproach for feeble-spirited + fellow-citizens who abandon their native climate and come to + live in Italy?" + </p> + <p> + The old man drew his fur coat closer about him and shrugged + his shoulders in true Florentine fashion. "There may be + something to say against those who do so in the heyday of + life, but I shall not be the one to say it. The race must yet + revert in its decrepitude, as I have in mine, to the climates + of the South. Since I have been in Italy I have realised what + used to occur to me dimly at home—the cruel + disproportion between the end gained and the means expended + in reclaiming the savage North. Half the human endeavour, + half the human suffering, would have made the whole South + Protestant and the whole East Christian, and our civilisation + would now be there. No, I shall never go back to New England. + New England? New Ireland——New Canada! Half the + farms in Haddam are in the hands of our Irish friends, and + the labour on the rest is half done by French Canadians. That + is all right and well. New England must come to me here, by + way of the great middle West and the Pacific coast." + </p> + <p> + Colville smiled at the Emersonian touch, but he said gravely, + "I can never quite reconcile myself to the thought of dying + out of my own country." + </p> + <p> + "Why not? It is very unimportant where one dies. A moment + after your breath is gone you are in exile for ever—or + at home for ever." + </p> + <p> + Colville sat musing upon this phase of Americanism, as he had + upon many others. At last he broke the silence they had both + let fall, far away from the topic they had touched. + </p> + <p> + "Well," he asked, "how did you enjoy the veglione?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I'm too old to go to such places for pleasure," said the + minister simply. "But it was very interesting, and certainly + very striking: especially when I went back, toward daylight, + after seeing Mrs. Bowen home." + </p> + <p> + "Did you go back?" demanded Colville, in some amaze. + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes. I felt that my experience was incomplete without + some knowledge of how the Carnival ended at such a place." + </p> + <p> + "Oh! And do you still feel that Savonarola was mistaken?" + </p> + <p> + "There seemed to be rather more boisterousness toward the + close, and, if I might judge, the excitement grew a little + unwholesome. But I really don't feel myself very well + qualified to decide. My own life has been passed in + circumstances so widely different that I am at a certain + disadvantage." + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said Colville, with a smile; "I daresay the Carnival + at Haddam East Village was quite another tiling." + </p> + <p> + The old man smiled responsively. "I suppose that some of my + former parishioners might have been scandalised at my + presence at a Carnival ball, had they known the fact merely + in the abstract; but in my letters home I shall try to set it + before them in an instructive light. I should say that the + worst thing about such a scene of revelry would be that it + took us too much out of our inner quiet. But I suppose the + same remark might apply to almost any form of social + entertainment." + </p> + <p> + "Yes." + </p> + <p> + "But human nature is so constituted that some means of + expansion must be provided, or a violent explosion takes + place. The only question is what means are most innocent. I + have been looking about," added the old man quietly, "at the + theatres lately." + </p> + <p> + "Have you?" asked Colville, opening his eyes, in suppressed + surprise. + </p> + <p> + "Yes; with a view to determining the degree of harmless + amusement that may be derived from them. It's rather a + difficult question. I should be inclined to say, however, + that I don't think the ballet can ever be instrumental for + good." + </p> + <p> + Colville could not deny himself the pleasure of saying, + "Well, not the highest, I suppose." + </p> + <p> + "No," said Mr. Waters, in apparent unconsciousness of the + irony. "But I think the Church has made a mistake in + condemning the theatre <i>in toto</i>. It appears to me that + it might always have countenanced a certain order of comedy, + in which the motive and plot are unobjectionable. Though I + don't deny that there are moods when all laughter seems low + and unworthy and incompatible with the most advanced state of + being. And I confess," he went on, with a dreamy + thoughtfulness, "that I have very great misgivings in regard + to tragedy. The glare that it throws upon the play of the + passions—jealousy in its anguish, revenge glutting + itself, envy eating its heart, hopeless love—their + nakedness is terrible. The terror may be salutary; it may be + very mischievous. I am afraid that I have left some of my + inquiries till it is too late. I seem to have no longer the + materials of judgment left in me. If I were still a young man + like you——" + </p> + <p> + "Am I still a young man?" interrupted Colville sadly. + </p> + <p> + "You are young enough to respond to the appeals that + sometimes find me silent. If I were of your age I should + certainly investigate some of these interesting problems." + </p> + <p> + "Ah, but if you become personally interested in the problems, + it's as bad as if you hadn't the materials of judgment left; + you're prejudiced. Besides, I doubt my youthfulness very + much." + </p> + <p> + "You are fifty, I presume?" suggested Mr. Waters, in a + leading way. + </p> + <p> + "Not very near—only too near," laughed Colville. "I'm + forty-one." + </p> + <p> + "You are younger than I supposed. But I remember now that at + your age I had the same feeling which you intimate. It seemed + to me then that I had really passed the bound which separates + us from the further possibility of youth. But I've lived long + enough since to know that I was mistaken. At forty, one has + still a great part of youth before him—perhaps the + richest and sweetest part. By that time the turmoil of ideas + and sensations is over; we see clearly and feel consciously. + We are in a sort of quiet in which we peacefully enjoy. We + have enlarged our perspective sufficiently to perceive things + in their true proportion and relation; we are no longer + tormented with the lurking fear of death, which darkens and + embitters our earlier years; we have got into the habit of + life; we have often been ailing and we have not died. Then we + have time enough behind us to supply us with the materials of + reverie and reminiscence; the terrible solitude of + inexperience is broken; we have learned to smile at many + things besides the fear of death. We ought also to have + learned pity and patience. Yes," the old man concluded, in + cheerful self-corroboration, "it is a beautiful age." + </p> + <p> + "But it doesn't look so beautiful as it is," Colville + protested. "People in that rosy prime don't produce the + effect of garlanded striplings upon the world at large. The + women laugh at us; they think we are fat old fellows; they + don't recognise the slender and elegant youth that resides in + our unwieldy bulk." + </p> + <p> + "You take my meaning a little awry. Besides, I doubt if even + the ground you assume is tenable. If a woman has lived long + enough to be truly young herself, she won't find a man at + forty either decrepit or grotesque. He can even make himself + youthful to a girl of thought and imagination." + </p> + <p> + "Yes," Colville assented, with a certain discomfort. + </p> + <p> + "But to be truly young at forty," resumed Mr. Waters, "a man + should be already married." + </p> + <p> + "Yes?" + </p> + <p> + "I sometimes feel," continued the old man, "that I made a + mistake in yielding to a disappointment that I met with early + in life, and in not permitting myself the chance of + retrieval. I have missed a beautiful and consoling experience + in my devotion to a barren regret." + </p> + <p> + Colville said nothing, but he experienced a mixed feeling of + amusement, of repulsion, and of curiosity at this. + </p> + <p> + "We are put into the world to be of it. I am more and more + convinced of that. We have scarcely a right to separate + ourselves from the common lot in any way. I justify myself + for having lived alone only as a widower might. I—lost + her. It was a great while ago." + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said Colville, after the pause which ensued; "I agree + with you that one has no right to isolate himself, to refuse + his portion of the common lot; but the effects of even a + rebuff may last so long that one has no heart to put out his + hand a second time—for a second rap over the knuckles. + Oh, I know how trivial it is in the retrospect, and how what + is called a disappointment is something to be humbly grateful + for in most cases; but for a while it certainly makes you + doubtful whether you were ever really intended to share the + common lot." He was aware of an insincerity in his words; he + hoped that it might not be perceptible, but he did not + greatly care. + </p> + <p> + Mr. Waters took no notice of what he had been saying. He + resumed from another point. "But I should say that it would + be unwise for a man of mature life to seek his happiness with + one much younger than himself. I don't deny that there are + cases in which the disparity of years counts for little or + nothing, but generally speaking, people ought to be as + equally mated in age as possible. They ought to start with + the same advantages of ignorance. A young girl can only live + her life through a community of feeling, an equality of + inexperience in the man she gives her heart to. If he is + tired of things that still delight her, the chances of + unhappiness are increased." + </p> + <p> + "Yes, that's true," answered Colville gravely. "It's apt to + be a mistake and a wrong." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, not always—not always," said the old minister. "We + mustn't look at it in that way quite. Wrongs are of the + will." He seemed to lapse into a greater intimacy of feeling + with Colville. "Have you seen Mrs. Bowen to-day? Or—ah! + true! I think you told me." + </p> + <p> + "No," said Colville. "Have we spoken of her? But I have seen + her." + </p> + <p> + "And was the little one well?" + </p> + <p> + "Very much better." + </p> + <p> + "Pretty creatures, both of them," said the minister, with as + fresh a pleasure in his recognition of the fact as if he had + not said nearly the same thing once before, "You've noticed + the very remarkable resemblance between mother and daughter?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes." + </p> + <p> + "There is a gentleness in Mrs. Bowen which seems to me the + last refinement of a gracious spirit," suggested Mr. Waters. + "I have never met any lady who reconciled more exquisitely + what is charming in society with what is lovely in nature." + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said Colville. "Mrs. Bowen always had that gentle + manner. I used to know her here as a girl a great while ago." + </p> + <p> + "Did you? I wonder you allowed her to become Mrs. Bowen." + </p> + <p> + This sprightliness of Mr. Waters amused Colville greatly. "At + that time I was preoccupied with my great mistake, and I had + no eyes for Mrs. Bowen." + </p> + <p> + "It isn't too late yet," said Mr. Waters, with open + insinuation. + </p> + <p> + A bachelor of forty is always flattered by any suggestion of + marriage; the suggestion that a beautiful and charming woman + would marry him is too much for whatever reserves of modesty + and wisdom he may have stored up Colville took leave of the + old minister in better humour with himself than he had been + for forty-eight hours, or than he had any very good reason + for being now. + </p> + <p> + Mr. Waters came with him to the head of the stairs and held + up the lamp for him to see. The light fell upon the white + locks thinly straggling from beneath his velvet skull-cap, + and he looked like some mediaeval scholar of those who lived + and died for learning in Florence when letters were a passion + there almost as strong as love. + </p> + <p> + The next day Colville would have liked to go at once and ask + about Effie, but upon the whole he thought he would not go + till after he had been at the reception where he was going in + the afternoon. It was an artist who was giving the reception; + he had a number of pictures to show, and there was to be tea. + There are artists and artists. This painter was one who had a + distinct social importance. It was felt to be rather a nice + thing to be asked to his reception; one was sure at least to + meet the nicest people. + </p> + <p> + This reason prevailed with Colville so far as it related to + Mrs. Bowen, whom he felt that he would like to tell he had + been there. He would speak to her of this person and + that—very respected and recognised social + figures,—so that she might see he was not the outlaw, + the Bohemian, he must sometimes have appeared to her. It + would not be going too far to say that something like an + obscure intention to show himself the next Sunday at the + English chapel, where Mrs. Bowen went, was not forming itself + in his mind. As he went along it began to seem not impossible + that she would be at the reception. If Effie's indisposition + was no more serious than it appeared yesterday, very probably + Mrs. Bowen would be there. He even believed that he + recognised her carriage among those which were drawn up in + front of the old palace, under the painter's studio windows. + </p> + <p> + There were a great number of people of the four nationalities + that mostly consort in Italy. There were English and + Americans and Russians and the sort of Italians resulting + from the native intermarriages with them; here and there were + Italians of pure blood, borderers upon the foreign life + through a literary interest, or an artistic relation, or a + matrimonial intention; here and there, also, the large + stomach of a German advanced the bounds of the new empire and + the new ideal of duty. There were no Frenchmen; one may meet + them in more strictly Italian assemblages, but it is as if + the sorrows and uncertainties of France in these times + discouraged them from the international society in which they + were always an infrequent element. It is not, of course, + imaginable that as Frenchmen they have doubts of their + merits, but that they have their misgivings as to the + intelligence of others. The language that prevailed was + English—in fact, one heard no other,—and the tea + which our civilisation carries everywhere with it steamed + from the cups in all hands. This beverage, in fact, becomes a + formidable factor in the life of a Florentine winter. One + finds it at all houses, and more or less mechanically drinks + it. + </p> + <p> + "I am turning out a terrible tea toper," said Colville, + stirring his cup in front of the old lady whom his relations + to the ladies at Palazzo Pinti had interested so much. "I + don't think I drink less than ten cups a day; seventy cups a + week is a low average for me. I'm really beginning to look + down at my boots a little anxiously." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Amsden laughed. She had not been in America for forty + years, but she liked the American way of talking better than + any other. "Oh, didn't you hear about Inglehart when he was + here? He was so good-natured that he used to drink all the + tea people offered him, and then the young ladies made tea + for him in his studio when they went to look at his pictures. + It almost killed him. By the time spring came he trembled so + that the brush flew out of his hands when he took it up. He + had to hurry off to Venice to save his life. It's just as bad + at the Italian houses; they've learned to like tea." + </p> + <p> + "When I was here before, they never offered you anything but + coffee," said Colville. "They took tea for medicine, and + there was an old joke that I thought I should die of, I heard + it so often about the Italian that said to the English woman + when she offered him tea, '<i>Grazie; sto bene</i>.'" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, that's all changed now." + </p> + <p> + "Yes; I've seen the tea, and I haven't heard the joke." + </p> + <p> + The flavour of Colville's talk apparently encouraged his + companion to believe that he would like to make fun of their + host's paintings with her; but whether he liked them, or + whether he was principled against that sort of return for + hospitality, he chose to reply seriously to some ironical + lures she threw out. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, if you're going to be good," she exclaimed, "I shall + have nothing more to say to you. Here comes Mr. Thurston; I + can make <i>him</i> abuse the pictures. There! You had better + go away to a young lady I see alone over yonder, though I + don't know what you will do with <i>one</i> alone." She + laughed and shook her head in a way that had once been arch + and lively, but that was now puckery and infirm—it is + affecting to see these things in women—and welcomed the + old gentleman who came up and superseded Colville. + </p> + <p> + The latter turned, with his cup still in his hand, and + wandered about through the company, hoping he might see Mrs. + Bowen among the groups peering at the pictures or solidly + blocking the view in front of them. He did not find her, but + he found Imogene Graham standing somewhat apart near a + window. He saw her face light up at sight of him, and then + darken again as he approached. + </p> + <p> + "Isn't this rather an unnatural state of things?" he asked + when he had come up. "I ought to be obliged to fight my way + to you through successive phalanxes of young men crowding + round with cups of tea outstretched in their imploring hands. + Have you had some tea?" + </p> + <p> + "Thank you, no; I don't wish any," said the young girl, so + coldly that he could not help noticing, though commonly he + was man enough to notice very few things. + </p> + <p> + "How is Effie to-day?" he asked quickly. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, quite well," said Imogene. + </p> + <p> + "I don't see Mrs. Bowen," he ventured further. + </p> + <p> + "No," answered the girl, still very lifelessly; "I came with + Mrs. Fleming." She looked about the room as if not to look at + him. + </p> + <p> + He now perceived a distinct intention to snub him. He smiled. + "Have you seen the pictures? There are two or three really + lovely ones." + </p> + <p> + "Mrs. Fleming will be here in a moment, I suppose," said + Imogene evasively, but not with all her first coldness. + </p> + <p> + "Let us steal a march on her," said Colville briskly. "When + she comes you can tell her that I showed you the pictures." + </p> + <p> + "I don't know," faltered the girl. + </p> + <p> + "Perhaps it isn't necessary you should," he suggested. + </p> + <p> + She glanced at him with questioning trepidation. + </p> + <p> + "The respective duties of chaperone and + <i>protégée</i> are rather undefined. Where the + chaperone isn't there to command, the + <i>protégée</i> isn't there to obey. I suppose + you'd know if you were at home?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes!" + </p> + <p> + "Let me imagine myself at a loan exhibition in Buffalo. Ah! + that appeal is irresistible. You'll come, I see." + </p> + <p> + She hesitated; she looked at the nearest picture, then + followed him to another. He now did what he had refused to do + for the old lady who tempted him to it; he made fun of the + pictures a little, but so amiably and with so much justice to + their good points that the painter himself would not have + minded his jesting. From time to time he made Imogene smile, + but in her eyes lurked a look of uneasiness, and her manner + expressed a struggle against his will which might have had + its pathos for him in different circumstances, but now it + only incited him to make her forget herself more and more; he + treated her as one does a child that is out of + sorts—coaxingly, ironically. + </p> + <p> + When they had made the round of the rooms Mrs. Fleming was + not at the window where she had left Imogene; the girl + detected the top of her bonnet still in the next room. + </p> + <p> + "The chaperone is never there when you come back with the + <i>protégée</i>," said Colville. "It seems to + be the nature of the chaperone." + </p> + <p> + Imogene turned very grave. "I think I ought to go to her," + she murmured. + </p> + <p> + "Oh no; she ought to come to you; I stand out for + <i>protégée</i>'s rights." + </p> + <p> + "I suppose she will come directly." + </p> + <p> + "She sees me with you; she knows you are safe." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, of course," said the girl. After a constraint which she + marked by rather a long silence, she added, "How strange a + roomful of talking sounds, doesn't it? Just like a great + caldron boiling up and bubbling over. Wouldn't you like to + know what they're all saying?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, it's quite bad enough to see them," replied Colville + frivolously. + </p> + <p> + "I think a company of gentlemen with their hats off look very + queer, don't you?" she asked, after another interval. + </p> + <p> + "Well, really," said Colville, laughing, "I don't know that + the spectacle ever suggested any metaphysical speculations to + me. I rather think they look queerer with their hats on." + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes." + </p> + <p> + "Though there is not very much to choose. We're a + queer-looking set, anyway." + </p> + <p> + He got himself another cup of tea, and coming back to her, + allowed her to make the efforts to keep up the conversation, + and was not without a malicious pleasure in her struggles. + They interested him as social exercises which, however abrupt + and undexterous now, were destined, with time and practice, + to become the finesse of a woman of society, and to be + accepted, even while they were still abrupt and undexterous, + as touches of character. He had broken up that coldness with + which she had met him at first, and now he let her adjust the + fragments as she could to the new situation. He wore that air + of a gentleman who has been talking a long time to a lady, + and who will not dispute her possession with a new-comer. + </p> + <p> + But no one came, though, as he cast his eyes carelessly over + the company, he found that it had been increased by the + accession of eight or ten young fellows, with a refreshing + light of originality in their faces, and little touches of + difference from the other men in their dress. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, there are the Inglehart boys!" cried the girl, with a + flash of excitement. + </p> + <p> + There was a sensation of interest and friendliness in the + company as these young fellows, after their moment of social + intimidation, began to gather round the pictures, and to + fling their praise and blame about, and talk the delightful + shop of the studio. + </p> + <p> + The sight of their fresh young faces, the sound of their + voices, struck a pang of regret that was almost envy to + Colville's heart. + </p> + <p> + Imogene followed them with eager eyes. "Oh," she sighed, + "shouldn't you like to be an artist?" + </p> + <p> + "I should, very much." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I beg your pardon; I forgot. I knew you were an + architect." + </p> + <p> + "I should say I used to be, if you hadn't objected to my + perfects and preterits." + </p> + <p> + What came next seemed almost an accident. + </p> + <p> + "I didn't suppose you cared for my objections, so long as I + amused you." She suddenly glanced at him, as if terrified at + her own words. + </p> + <p> + "Have you been trying to amuse me?" he asked. + </p> + <p> + "Oh no. I thought——" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, then," said Colville sharply, "you meant that I was + amusing myself with you?" She glanced at him in terror of his + divination, but could not protest. "Has any one told you + that?" he pursued, with sudden angry suspicion. + </p> + <p> + "No, <i>no</i> one," began Imogene. She glanced about her, + frightened. They stood quite alone where they were; the + people had mostly wandered off into the other rooms. "Oh, + don't—I didn't mean—I didn't intend to say + anything——" + </p> + <p> + "But you have said something—something that surprises + me from <i>you</i>, and hurts me. I wish to know whether you + say it from yourself." + </p> + <p> + "I don't know—yes. That is, not——Oh, I wish + Mrs. Fleming——" + </p> + <p> + She looked as if another word of pursuit would put it beyond + her power to control herself. + </p> + <p> + "Let me take you to Mrs. Fleming," said Colville, with + freezing <i>hauteur</i>; and led the way where the top of + Mrs. Fleming's bonnet still showed itself. He took leave at + once, and hastily parting with his host, found himself in the + street, whirled in many emotions. The girl had not said that + from herself, but it was from some woman; he knew that by the + directness of the phrase and its excess, for he had noticed + that women who liked to beat about the bush in small matters + have a prodigious straightforwardness in more vital affairs, + and will even call grey black in order clearly to establish + the presence of the black in that colour. He could hardly + keep himself from going to Palazzo Pinti. + </p> + <p> + But he contrived to go to his hotel instead, where he ate a + moody dinner, and then, after an hour's solitary bitterness + in his room, went out and passed the evening at the theatre. + The play was one of those fleering comedies which render + contemptible for the time all honest and earnest intention, + and which surely are a whiff from the bottomless pit itself. + It made him laugh at the serious strain of self-question that + had mingled with his resentment; it made him laugh even at + his resentment, and with its humour in his thoughts, sent him + off to sleep in a sottish acceptance of whatever was trivial + in himself as the only thing that was real and lasting. + </p> + <p> + He slept late, and when Paolo brought up his breakfast, he + brought with it a letter which he said had been left with the + porter an hour before. A faint appealing perfume of violet + exhaled from the note, and mingled with the steaming odours + of the coffee and boiled milk, when Colville, after a glance + at the unfamiliar handwriting of the superscription, broke + the seal. + </p> + <p> + "DEAR MR. COLVILLE,—I don't know what you will think of + my writing to you, but perhaps you can't think worse of me + than you do already, and anything will be better than the + misery that I am in. I have not been asleep all night. I hate + myself for telling you, but I do want you to understand how I + have felt. I would give worlds if I could take back the words + that you say wounded you. I didn't mean to wound you. Nobody + is to blame for them but me; nobody ever breathed a word + about you that was meant in unkindness. + </p> + <p> + "I am not ashamed of writing this, <i>whatever</i> you think, + and I will sign my name in full. IMOGENE GRAHAM." + </p> + <p> + Colville had commonly a good appetite for his breakfast, but + now he let his coffee stand long un-tasted. There were + several things about this note that touched him—the + childlike simplicity and directness, the generous courage, + even the imperfection and crudity of the literature. However + he saw it afterward, he saw it then in its true intention. He + respected that intention; through all the sophistications in + which life had wrapped him, it awed him a little. He realised + that if he had been younger he would have gone to Imogene + herself with her letter. He felt for the moment a rush of the + emotion which he would once not have stopped to examine, + which he would not have been capable of examining. But now + his duty was clear; he must go to Mrs. Bowen. In the noblest + human purpose there is always some admixture, however slight, + of less noble motive, and Colville was not without the + willingness to see whatever embarrassment she might feel when + he showed her the letter, and to invoke her finest tact to + aid him in re-assuring the child. + </p> + <p> + She was alone in her drawing-room, and she told him in + response to his inquiry for their health that Imogene and + Effie had gone out to drive. She looked so pretty in the + quiet house dress in which she rose from the sofa and stood, + letting him come the whole way to greet her, that he did not + think of any other look in her, but afterward he remembered + an evidence of inner tumult in her brightened eyes. + </p> + <p> + He said, smiling, "I'm so glad to see you alone," and this + brought still another look into her face, which also he + afterward remembered. She did not reply, but made a sound in + her throat like a bird when it stirs itself for flight or + song. It was a strange, indefinite little note, in which + Colville thought he detected trepidation at the time, and + recalled for the sort of expectation suggested in it. She + stood waiting for him to go on. + </p> + <p> + "I have come to get you to help me out of trouble." + </p> + <p> + "Yes?" said Mrs. Bowen, with a vague smile. "I always + supposed you would be able to help yourself out of trouble. + Or perhaps wouldn't mind it if you were in it." + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes, I mind it very much," returned Colville, refusing + her banter, if it were banter. "Especially this sort of + trouble, which involves some one else in the discomfort." He + went on abruptly: "I have been held up to a young lady as a + person who was amusing himself with her, and I was so absurd + as to be angry when she told me, and demanded the name of my + friend, whoever it was. My behaviour seems to have given the + young lady a bad night, and this morning she writes to tell + me so, and to take all the blame on herself, and to assure me + that no harm was meant me by any one. Of course I don't want + her to be distressed about it. Perhaps you can guess who has + been writing to me." + </p> + <p> + Colville said all this looking down, in a fashion he had. + When he looked up he saw a severity in Mrs. Bowen's pretty + face, such as he had not seen there before. + </p> + <p> + "I didn't know she had been writing to you, but I know that + you are talking of Imogene. She told me what she had said to + you yesterday, and I blamed her for it, but I'm not sure that + it wasn't best." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, indeed!" said Colville. "Perhaps you can tell me who put + the idea into her head?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes; I did." + </p> + <p> + A dead silence ensued, in which the fragments of the + situation broken by these words revolved before Colville's + thought with kaleidoscopic variety, and he passed through all + the phases of anger, resentment, wounded self-love, and + accusing shame. + </p> + <p> + At last, "I suppose you had your reasons," he said simply. + </p> + <p> + "I am in her mother's place here," she replied, tightening + the grip of one little hand upon another, where she held them + laid against the side of her waist. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, I know that," said Colville; "but what reason had you + to warn her against me as a person who was amusing himself + with her? I don't like the phrase; but she seems to have got + it from you; I use it at third hand." + </p> + <p> + "I don't like the phrase either; I didn't invent it." + </p> + <p> + "You used it." + </p> + <p> + "No; it wasn't I who used it. I should have been glad to use + another, if I could," said Mrs. Bowen, with perfect + steadiness. + </p> + <p> + "Then you mean to say that you believe I've been trifling + with the feelings of this child?" + </p> + <p> + "I mean to say nothing. You are very much older; and she is a + romantic girl, very extravagant. You have tried to make her + like you." + </p> + <p> + "I certainly have. I have tried to make Effie Bowen like me + too." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen passed this over in serenity that he felt was not + far from contempt. + </p> + <p> + He gave a laugh that did not express enjoyment. + </p> + <p> + "You have no right to laugh!" she cried, losing herself a + little, and so making her first gain upon him. + </p> + <p> + "It appears not. Perhaps you will tell me what I am to do + about this letter?" + </p> + <p> + "That is for you to decide." She recovered herself, and lost + ground with him in proportion. + </p> + <p> + "I thought perhaps that since you were able to judge my + motives so clearly, you might be able to advise me." + </p> + <p> + "I don't judge your motives," Mrs. Bowen began. She added + suddenly, as if by an after-thought, "I don't think you had + any." + </p> + <p> + "I'm obliged to you." + </p> + <p> + "But you are as much to blame as if you had." + </p> + <p> + "And perhaps I'm as much to blame as if I had really wronged + somebody?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes." + </p> + <p> + "It's rather paradoxical. You don't wish me to see her any + more?" + </p> + <p> + "I haven't any wish about it; you must not <i>say</i> that I + have," said Mrs. Bowen, with dignity. + </p> + <p> + Colville smiled. "May I <i>ask</i> if you have?" + </p> + <p> + "Not for myself." + </p> + <p> + "You put me on very short allowance of conjecture." + </p> + <p> + "I will not let you trifle with the matter!" she cried. "You + have made me speak, when a word, a look, ought to have been + enough. Oh, I didn't think you had the miserable vanity to + wish it!" + </p> + <p> + Colville stood thinking a long time and she waiting. "I see + that everything is at an end. I am going away from Florence. + Good-bye, Mrs. Bowen." He approached her, holding out his + hand. But if he expected to be rewarded for this, nothing of + the kind happened. She shrank swiftly back. + </p> + <p> + "No, no. You shall not touch me." + </p> + <p> + He paused a moment, gazing keenly at her face, in which, + whatever other feeling showed, there was certainly no fear of + him. Then with a slight bow he left the room. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen ran from it by another door, and shut herself into + her own room. When she returned to the salotto, Imogene and + Effie were just coming in. The child went to lay aside her + hat and sacque; the girl, after a glance at Mrs. Bowen's + face, lingered inquiringly. + </p> + <p> + "Mr. Colville came here with your letter, Imogene." + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said Imogene faintly. "Do you think I oughtn't to have + written it?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, it makes no difference now. He is going away from + Florence." + </p> + <p> + "Yes?" breathed the girl. + </p> + <p> + "I spoke openly with him." + </p> + <p> + "Yes?" + </p> + <p> + "I didn't spare him. I made him think I hated and despised + him." + </p> + <p> + Imogene was silent. Then she said, "I know that whatever you + have done, you have acted for the best." + </p> + <p> + "Yes, I have a right that you should say that—I have a + right that you should always say it. I think he has behaved + very foolishly, but I don't blame him——" + </p> + <p> + "No! I was to blame." + </p> + <p> + "I don't <i>know</i> that he was to blame, and I won't let + you think he was." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, he is the best man in the world!" + </p> + <p> + "He gave up at once; he didn't try to defend himself. It's + nothing for you to lose a friend at your age; but at + mine——" + </p> + <p> + "I <i>know</i> it, Mrs. Bowen." + </p> + <p> + "And I wouldn't even shake hands with him when he was going; + I——" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I don't see how you could be so hard!" cried Imogene. + She put up her hands to her face, and broke into tears. Mrs. + Bowen watched her, dry eyed, with her lips parted, and an + intensity of question in her face. + </p> + <p> + "Imogene," she said at last, "I wish you to promise me one + thing." + </p> + <p> + "Yes." + </p> + <p> + "Not to write to Mr. Colville again." + </p> + <p> + "No, no; indeed I won't, Mrs. Bowen!" The girl came up to + kiss her; Mrs. Bowen turned her cheek. + </p> + <p> + wish you to promise me this only because you don't feel sure + of yourself about him. If you care for him—if you think + you care for him—then I leave you perfectly free." + </p> + <p> + The girl looked up, scared. "No, no; I'd rather you wouldn't + leave me free—you mustn't; I shouldn't know what to + do." + </p> + <p> + "Very well, then," said Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + They both waited a moment, as if each were staying for the + other to speak. Then Imogene asked, "Is he—going soon?" + </p> + <p> + "I don't know," said Mrs. Bowen. "Why should he want to + delay? He had better go at once. And I hope he will go + home—as far from Florence as he can. I should think he + would <i>hate</i> the place." + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said the girl, with a quivering sigh; "it must be + hateful to him." She paused, and then she rushed on with + bitter self-reproach. "And I—<i>I</i> have helped to + make it so! O Mrs. Bowen, perhaps it's <i>I</i> who have been + trifling with <i>him</i> Trying to make him believe—no, + not trying to do that, but letting him see that I + sympathised—Oh, do you think I have?" + </p> + <p> + "You know what you have been doing, Imogene," said Mrs. + Bowen, with the hardness it surprises men to know women use + with each other, they seem such tender creatures in the + abstract. "You have no need to ask me." + </p> + <p> + "No, no." + </p> + <p> + "As you say, I warned you from the first." + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes; you did." + </p> + <p> + "I couldn't do more than hint; it was too much to + expect——" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, yes, yes." + </p> + <p> + "And if you couldn't take my hints, I was helpless." + </p> + <p> + "Yes; I see it." + </p> + <p> + "I was only afraid of saying too much, and all through that + miserable veglione business I was trying to please you and + him, because I was afraid I <i>had</i> said too + much—gone too far. I wanted to show you that I + disdained to be suspicious, that I was ashamed to suppose + that a girl of your age could care for the admiration of a + man of his." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I didn't care for his admiration. I admired + <i>him</i>—and pitied him." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen apparently would not be kept now from saying all + that had been rankling in her breast. "I didn't approve of + going to the veglione. A great many people would be shocked + if they knew I went; I wouldn't at all like to have it known. + But I was not going to have him thinking that I was severe + with you, and wanted to deny you any really harmless + pleasure." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, who could think that? You're only too good to me. You + see," said the girl, "what a return I have made for your + trust. I knew you didn't want to go to the veglione. If I + hadn't been the most selfish girl in the world I wouldn't + have let you. But I did. I <i>forced</i> you to go, and then, + after we got there, I seized every advantage, and abused your + kindness till I wonder I didn't sink through the floor. Yes; + I ought to have refused to dance—if I'd had a spark of + generosity or gratitude I would have done it; and I ought to + have come straight back to you the instant the waltz was + done. And now see what has come of it! I've made you think he + was trifling with me, and I've made him think that I'm a + false and hollow-hearted thing." + </p> + <p> + "You know best what you have done, Imogene," said Mrs. Bowen, + with a smiling tearfulness that was somehow very bitter. She + rose from the sofa, as if to indicate that there was no more + to be said, and Imogene, with a fresh burst of grief, rushed + away to her own room. + </p> + <p> + She dropped on her knees beside her bed, and stretched out + her arms upon it, an image of that desolation of soul which, + when we are young, seems limitless, but which in later life + we know has comparatively narrow bounds beyond the clouds + that rest so blackly around us. + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p><a name="XII"><!--Marker--></a> + <h2> + XII + </h2><br> + <br> + + <p> + In his room Colville was devouring as best he might the + chagrin with which he had come away from Palazzo Pinti, while + he packed his trunk for departure. Now that the thing was + over, the worst was past. Again he observed that his emotions + had no longer the continuity that the emotions of his youth + possessed. As he remembered, a painful or pleasant impression + used to last indefinitely; but here he was with this + humiliating affair hot in his mind, shrugging his shoulders + with a sense of relief, almost a sense of escape. Does the + soul really wear out with the body? The question flitted + across his mind as he took down a pair of trousers, and + noticed that they were considerably frayed about the feet; he + determined to give them to Paolo, and this reminded him to + ring for Paolo, and send word to the office that he was going + to take the evening train for Rome. + </p> + <p> + He went on packing, and putting away with the different + garments the unpleasant thoughts that he knew he should be + sure to unpack with them in Rome; but they would then have + less poignancy. + </p> + <p> + For the present he was doing the best he could, and he was + not making any sort of pretences. When his trunk was locked + he kindled himself a fire, and sat down before it to think of + Imogene. He began with her, but presently it seemed to be + Mrs. Bowen that he was thinking of; then he knew he was + dropping off to sleep by the manner in which their two ideas + mixed. The fatigues and excitements of the week had been + great, but he would not give way; it was too disgraceful. + </p> + <p> + Some one rapped at his door. He called out "<i>Avanti</i>!" + and he would have been less surprised to see either of those + ladies than Paolo with the account he had ordered to be made + out. It was a long, pendulous, minutely itemed affair, such + as the traveller's recklessness in candles and firewood comes + to in the books of the Continental landlord, and it almost + swept the floor when its volume was unrolled. But it was not + the sum-total that dismayed Colville when he glanced at the + final figure; that, indeed, was not so very great, with all + the items; it was the conviction, suddenly flashing upon him, + that he had not money enough by him to pay it. His watch, + held close to the fire, told him that it was five o'clock; + the banks had been closed an hour, and this was Saturday + afternoon. + </p> + <p> + The squalid accident had all the effect of intention, as he + viewed it from without himself, and considered that the money + ought to have been the first thing in his thoughts after he + determined to go away. He must get the money somehow, and be + off to Rome by the seven o'clock train. A whimsical + suggestion, which was so good a bit of irony that it made him + smile, flashed across him: he might borrow it of Mrs. Bowen. + She was, in fact, the only person in Florence with whom he + was at all on borrowing terms, and a sad sense of the + sweetness of her lost friendship followed upon the antic + notion. No; for once he could not go to Mrs. Bowen. He + recollected now the many pleasant talks they had had + together, confidential in virtue of their old acquaintance, + and harmlessly intimate in many things. He recalled how, when + he was feeling dull from the Florentine air, she had told him + to take a little quinine, and he had found immediate + advantage in it. These memories did strike him as grotesque + or ludicrous; he only felt their pathos. He was ashamed even + to seem in anywise recreant further. If she should ever hear + that he had lingered for thirty-six hours in Florence after + he had told her he was going away, what could she think but + that he had repented his decision? He determined to go down + to the office of the hotel, and see if he could not make some + arrangement with the landlord. It would be extremely + distasteful, but his ample letter of credit would be at least + a voucher of his final ability to pay. As a desperate resort + he could go and try to get the money of Mr. Waters. + </p> + <p> + He put on his coat and hat, and opened the door to some one + who was just in act to knock at it, and whom he struck + against in the obscurity. + </p> + <p> + "I beg your pardon," said the visitor. + </p> + <p> + "Mr. Waters! Is it possible?" cried Colville, feeling + something fateful in the chance. "I was just going to see + you." + </p> + <p> + "I'm fortunate in meeting you, then. Shall we go to my room?" + he asked, at a hesitation in Colville's manner. + </p> + <p> + "No, no," said the latter; "come in here." He led the way + back into his room, and struck a match to light the candles + on his chimney. Their dim rays fell upon the disorder his + packing had left. "You must excuse the look of things," he + said. "The fact is, I'm just going away. I'm going to Rome at + seven o'clock." + </p> + <p> + "Isn't this rather sudden?" asked the minister, with less + excitement than the fact might perhaps have been expected to + create in a friend. "I thought you intended to pass the + winter in Florence." + </p> + <p> + "Yes, I did—sit down, please—but I find myself + obliged to cut my stay short. Won't you take off your coat?" + he asked, taking off his own. + </p> + <p> + "Thank you; I've formed the habit of keeping it on indoors," + said Mr. Waters. "And I oughtn't to stay long, if you're to + be off so soon." + </p> + <p> + Colville gave a very uncomfortable laugh. "Why, the fact is, + I'm not off so very soon unless you help me." + </p> + <p> + "Ah?" returned the old gentleman, with polite interest. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, I find myself in the absurd position of a man who has + reckoned without his host. I have made all my plans for + going, and have had my hotel bill sent to me in pursuance of + that idea, and now I discover that I not only haven't money + enough to pay it and get to Rome, but I haven't much more + than half enough to pay it. I have credit galore," he said, + trying to give the situation a touch of liveliness, "but the + bank is shut." + </p> + <p> + Mr. Waters listened to the statement with a silence + concerning which Colville was obliged to form his + conjectures. "That is unfortunate," he said sympathetically, + but not encouragingly. + </p> + <p> + Colville pushed on desperately. "It is, unless you can help + me, Mr. Waters. I want you to lend me fifty dollars for as + many hours." + </p> + <p> + Mr. Waters shook his head with a compassionate smile. "I + haven't fifty francs in cash. You are welcome to what there + is. I'm very forgetful about money matters, and haven't been + to the bankers." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, don't excuse yourself to me, unless you wish to embitter + my shame. must try to run my face with the landlord," said + Colville. + </p> + <p> + "Oh no," said Mr. Waters gently. "Is there such haste as all + that?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes, I must go at once." + </p> + <p> + "I don't like to have you apply to a stranger," said the old + man, with fatherly kindness. "Can't you remain over till + Monday? I had a little excursion to propose." + </p> + <p> + "No, I can't possibly stay; I must go to-night," cried + Colville. + </p> + <p> + The minister rose. "Then I really mustn't detain you, I + suppose. Good-bye." He offered his hand. Colville took it, + but could not let it go at once. "I would like extremely to + tell you why I'm leaving Florence in such haste. But I don't + see what good it would do, for I don't want you to persuade + me to stay." + </p> + <p> + The old gentleman looked at him with friendly interest. + </p> + <p> + "The fact is," Colville proceeded, as if he had been + encouraged to do so, "I have had the misfortune—yes, + I'm afraid I've had the fault—to make myself very + displeasing to Mrs. Bowen, and in such a way that the very + least I can do is to take myself off as far and as soon as I + conveniently can." + </p> + <p> + "Yes?" said Mr. Waters, with the cheerful note of incredulity + in his voice with which one is apt to respond to others' + confession of extremity. "Is it so bad as that? I've just + seen Mrs. Bowen, and she told me you were going." + </p> + <p> + "Oh," said Colville, with disagreeable sensation, "perhaps + she told you why I was going." + </p> + <p> + "No," answered Mr. Waters; "she didn't do that." Colville + imagined a consciousness in him, which perhaps did not exist. + "She didn't allude to the subject further than to state the + fact, when I mentioned that I was coming to see you." + </p> + <p> + Colville had dropped his hand. "She was very forbearing," he + said, with bitterness that might well have been + incomprehensible to Mr. Waters upon any theory but one. + </p> + <p> + "Perhaps," he suggested, "you are precipitate; perhaps you + have mistaken; perhaps you have been hasty. These things are + often the result of impulse in women. I have often wondered + how they could make up their minds; I believe they certainly + ought to be allowed to change them at least once." + </p> + <p> + Colville turned very red. "What in the world do you mean? Do + you imagine that I have been offering myself to Mrs. Bowen?" + </p> + <p> + "Wasn't it that which you wished to—which you said you + would like to tell me?" + </p> + <p> + Colville was suddenly silent, on the verge of a self-derisive + laugh. When he spoke, he said gently: "No; it wasn't that. I + never thought of offering myself to her. We have always been + very good friends. But now I'm afraid we can't be friends any + more—at least we can't be acquaintances." + </p> + <p> + "Oh!" exclaimed Mr. Waters. He waited a while as if for + Colville to say more, but the latter remained silent, and the + old man gave his hand again in farewell. "I must really be + going. I hope you won't think me intrusive in my mistaken + conjecture?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh no." + </p> + <p> + "It was what I supposed you had been telling + me——" + </p> + <p> + "I understand. You mustn't be troubled," said Colville, + though he had to own to himself that it seemed superfluous to + make this request of Mr. Waters, who was taking the affair + with all the serenity of age concerning matters of sentiment. + "I wish you were going to Rome with me," he added, to + disembarrass the moment of parting. + </p> + <p> + "Thank you. But I shall not go to Rome for some years. Shall + you come back on your way in the spring?" + </p> + <p> + "No, I shall not come to Florence again," said Colville + sadly. + </p> + <p> + "Ah, I'm sorry. Good-bye, my dear young friend. It's been a + great pleasure to know you." Colville walked down to the door + of the hotel with his visitor and parted with him there. As + he turned back he met the landlord, who asked him if he would + have the omnibus for the station. The landlord bowed + smilingly, after his kind, and rubbed his hands. He said he + hoped Colville was pleased with his hotel, and ran to his + desk in the little office to get some cards for him, so that + he might recommend it accurately to American families. + </p> + <p> + Colville looked absently at the cards. "The fact is," he + said, to the little bowing, smiling man; "I don't know but I + shall be obliged to postpone my going till Monday." He smiled + too, trying to give the fact a jocose effect, and added, "I + find myself out of money, and I've no means of paying your + bill till I can see my bankers." + </p> + <p> + After all his heroic intention, this was as near as he could + come to asking the landlord to let him send the money from + Rome. + </p> + <p> + The little man set his head on one side. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, well, occupy the room until Monday, then," he cried + hospitably. "It is quite at your disposition. You will not + want the omnibus?" + </p> + <p> + "No, I shall not want the omnibus," said Colville, with a + laugh, doubtless not perfectly intelligible to the landlord, + who respectfully joined him in it. + </p> + <p> + He did not mean to stop that night without writing to Mrs. + Bowen, and assuring her that though an accident had kept him + in Florence till Monday, she need not be afraid of seeing him + again. But he could not go back to his room yet; he wandered + about the town, trying to pick himself up from the ruin into + which he had fallen again, and wondering with a sort of alien + compassion what was to become of his aimless, empty + existence. As he passed through the Piazza San Marco he had + half a mind to pick a pebble from the gardened margin of the + fountain there and toss it against the Rev. Mr. Waters's + window, and when he put his skull-cap out, to ask that + optimistic agnostic what a man had best do with a life that + had ceased to interest him. But, for the time being, he got + rid of himself as he best could by going to the opera. They + professed to give <i>Rigoletto</i>, but it was all Mrs. Bowen + and Imogene Graham to Colville. + </p> + <p> + It was so late when he got back to his hotel that the outer + gate was shut, and he had to wake up the poor little porter, + as on that night when he returned from Madame Uccelli's. The + porter was again equal to his duty, and contrived to light a + new candle to show him the way to his room. The repetition, + almost mechanical, of this small chicane made Colville smile, + and this apparently encouraged the porter to ask, as if he + supposed him to have been in society somewhere— + </p> + <p> + "You have amused yourself this evening? + </p> + <p> + "Oh, very much." + </p> + <p> + "I am glad. There is a letter for you.' + </p> + <p> + "A letter! Where?" + </p> + <p> + "I sent it to your room. It came just before midnight." + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p><a name="XIII"><!--Marker--></a> + <h2> + XIII + </h2><br> + <br> + + <p> + Mrs. Bowen sat before the hearth in her <i>salon</i>, with + her hands fallen in her lap. At thirty-eight the emotions + engrave themselves more deeply in the face than they do in + our first youth, or than they will when we have really aged, + and the pretty woman looked haggard. + </p> + <p> + Imogene came in, wearing a long blue robe, flung on as if + with desperate haste; her thick hair fell crazily out of a + careless knot, down her back. "I couldn't sleep," she said, + with quivering lips, at the sight of which Mrs. Bowen's + involuntary smile hardened. "Isn't it eleven yet?" she added, + with a glance at the clock. "It seems years since I went to + bed." + </p> + <p> + "It's been a long day," Mrs. Bowen admitted. She did not ask + Imogene why she could not sleep, perhaps because she knew + already, and was too honest to affect ignorance. + </p> + <p> + The girl dropped into a chair opposite her, and began to pull + her fingers through the long tangle of her hair, while she + drew her breath in sighs that broke at times on her lips; + some tears fell down her cheeks unheeded. "Mrs. Bowen," she + said, at length, "I should like to know what right we have to + drive any one from Florence? I should think people would call + it rather a high-handed proceeding if it were known." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen met this feebleness promptly. "It isn't likely to + be known. But we are not driving Mr. Colville away." + </p> + <p> + "He is going." + </p> + <p> + "Yes; he said he would go." + </p> + <p> + "Don't you believe he will go?" + </p> + <p> + "I believe he will do what he says." + </p> + <p> + "He has been very kind to us all; he has been as + <i>good!</i>" + </p> + <p> + "No one feels that more than I," said Mrs. Bowen, with a + slight tremor in her voice. She faltered a moment. "I can't + let you say those things to me, Imogene." + </p> + <p> + "No; I know it's wrong. I didn't know what I was saying. Oh, + I wish I could tell what I ought to do! I wish I could make + up my mind. Oh, I can't let him go—<i>so</i>. I—I + don't know what to think any more. Once it was clear, but now + I'm not sure; no, I'm not sure." + </p> + <p> + "Not sure about what?" + </p> + <p> + "I think I am the one to go away, if any one." + </p> + <p> + "You know you can't go away," said Mrs. Bowen, with weary + patience. + </p> + <p> + "No, of course not. Well, I shall never see any one like + him." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen made a start in her chair, as if she had no longer + the power to remain quiet, but only placed herself a little + more rigidly in it. + </p> + <p> + "No," the girl went on, as if uttering a hopeless reverie. + "He made every moment interesting. He was always thinking of + us—he never thought of himself. He did as much for + Effie as for any one; he tried just as hard to make himself + interesting to her. He was unselfish. I have seen him at + places being kind to the stupidest people. You never caught + him choosing out the stylish or attractive ones, or trying to + shine at anybody's expense. Oh, he's a true gentleman—I + shall always say it. How delicate he was, never catching you + up, or if you said a foolish thing, trying to turn it against + you. No, never, never, never! Oh dear! And now, what can he + think of me? Oh, how frivolous and fickle and selfish he must + think me!" + </p> + <p> + "Imogene!" Mrs. Bowen cried out, but quelled herself again. + </p> + <p> + "Yes," pursued the girl, in the same dreary monotone, "he + thinks I couldn't appreciate him because he was old. He + thinks that I cared for his not being handsome! + Perhaps—perhaps——" She began to catch her + breath in the effort to keep back the sobs that were coming. + "Oh, I can't bear it! I would rather die than let him think + it—such a thing as that!" She bent her head aside, and + cried upon the two hands with which she clutched the top of + her chair. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen sat looking at her distractedly. From time to time + she seemed to silence a word upon her lips, and in fact she + did not speak. + </p> + <p> + Imogene lifted her head at last, and softly dried her eyes. + Then, as she pushed her handkerchief back into the pocket of + her robe, "What sort of looking girl was that other one?" + </p> + <p> + "That other one?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes; you know what I mean: the one who behaved so badly to + him before." + </p> + <p> + "Imogene!" said Mrs. Bowen severely, "this is nonsense, and I + can't let you go on so. I might pretend not to know what you + mean; but I won't do that; and I tell you that there is no + sort of likeness—of comparison——" + </p> + <p> + "No, no," wailed the girl, "there <i>is</i> none. I feel + that. She had nothing to warn her—he hadn't suffered + then; he was young; he was able to bear it—you said it + yourself, Mrs. Bowen. But now—<i>now</i>, what will he + do? He could make fun of that, and not hate her so much, + because she didn't know how much harm she was doing. But I + did; and what can he think of me?" + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen looked across the barrier between them, that kept + her from taking Imogene into her arms, and laughing and + kissing away her craze, with cold dislike, and only said, + "You know whether you've really anything to accuse yourself + of, Imogene. I can't and won't consider Mr. Colville in the + matter; I <i>didn't</i> consider him in what I said to-day. + And I tell you again that I will not interfere with you in + the slightest degree beyond appearances and the + responsibility I feel to your mother. And it's for you to + know your own mind. You are old enough. I will do what you + say. It's for you to be sure that you wish what you say." + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said Imogene huskily, and she let an interval that was + long to them both elapse before she said anything more. "Have + I always done what you thought best, Mrs. Bowen?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes, I have never complained of you." + </p> + <p> + "Then why can't you tell me now what you think best?" + </p> + <p> + "Because there is nothing to be done. It is all over." + </p> + <p> + "But if it were not, would you tell me?" + </p> + <p> + "No." + </p> + <p> + "Why?" + </p> + <p> + "Because I—couldn't." + </p> + <p> + "Then I take back my promise not to write to Mr. Colville. I + am going to ask him to stay." + </p> + <p> + "Have you made up your mind to that, Imogene?" asked Mrs. + Bowen, showing no sign of excitement, except to take a faster + hold of her own wrists with the slim hands in which she had + caught them. + </p> + <p> + "Yes." + </p> + <p> + "You know the position it places you in?" + </p> + <p> + "What position?" + </p> + <p> + "Has he offered himself to you?" + </p> + <p> + "No!" the girl's face blazed. + </p> + <p> + "Then, after what's passed, this is the same as offering + yourself to him." + </p> + <p> + Imogene turned white. "I must write to him, unless you forbid + me." + </p> + <p> + "Certainly I shall not forbid you." Mrs. Bowen rose and went + to her writing-desk. "But if you have fully made up your mind + to this step, and are ready for the consequences, whatever + they are——" She stopped, before sitting down, and + looked back over her shoulder at Imogene. + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said the girl, who had also risen. + </p> + <p> + "Then I will write to Mr. Colville for you, and render the + proceeding as little objectionable as possible." + </p> + <p> + Imogene made no reply. She stood motionless while Mrs. Bowen + wrote. + </p> + <p> + "Is this what you wished?" asked the latter, offering the + sheet:—— + </p> + <p> + "Dear Mr. Colville,—I have reasons for wishing to + recall my consent to your going away. Will you not come and + lunch with us to-morrow, and try to forget everything that + has passed during a few days? + </p> + <p> + "Yours very sincerely, + </p> + <p> + "Evalina Bowen." + </p> + <p> + "Yes, that will do," gasped Imogene. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen rang the bell for the porter, and stood with her + back to the girl, waiting for him at the salon door. He came + after a delay that sufficiently intimated the lateness of the + hour. "This letter must go at once to the Hotel d'Atene," + said Mrs. Bowen peremptorily. + </p> + <p> + "You shall be served," said the porter, with fortitude. + </p> + <p> + As Mrs. Bowen turned, Imogene ran toward her with clasped + hands. "Oh, how merciful—how good——" + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen shrank back. "Don't touch me, Imogene, please!" + </p> + <p> + It was her letter which Colville found on his table and read + by the struggling light of his newly acquired candle. Then he + sat down and replied to it. + </p> + <p> + "Dear Mrs. Bowen,—I know that you mean some sort of + kindness by me, and I hope you will not think me prompted by + any poor resentment in declining to-morrow's lunch. I am + satisfied that it is best for me to go; and I am ashamed not + to be gone already. But a ridiculous accident has kept me, + and when I came in and found your note I was just going to + write and ask your patience with my presence in Florence till + Monday morning. + </p> + <p> + "Yours sincerely, THEODORE COLVILLE." + </p> + <p> + He took his note down to the porter, who had lain down again + in his little booth, but sprang up with a cheerful request to + be commanded. Colville consulted him upon the propriety of + sending the note to Palazzo Pinti at once, and the porter, + with his head laid in deprecation upon one of his lifted + shoulders, owned that it was perhaps the very least little + bit in the world late. + </p> + <p> + "Send it the first thing in the morning, then," said + Colville. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen received it by the servant who brought her coffee + to the room, and she sent it without any word to Imogene. The + girl came instantly back with it. She was fully dressed, as + if she had been up a long time, and she wore a very plain, + dull dress, in which one of her own sex might have read the + expression of a potential self-devotion. + </p> + <p> + "It's just as I wish it, Mrs. Bowen," she said, in a low key + of impassioned resolution. "<i>Now</i>, my conscience is at + rest. And you have done this for me, Mrs. Bowen!" She stood + timidly with the door in her hand, watching Mrs. Bowen's + slight smile; then, as if at some sign in it, she flew to the + bed and kissed her, and so fled out of the room again. + </p> + <p> + Colville slept late, and awoke with a vague sense of + self-reproach, which faded afterward to such poor + satisfaction as comes to us from the consciousness of having + made the best of a bad business; some pangs of softer regret + mixed with this. At first he felt a stupid obligation to keep + indoors, and he really did not go out till after lunch. The + sunshine had looked cold from his window, and with the bright + fire which he found necessary in his room, he fancied a + bitterness in the gusts that caught up the dust in the + piazza, and blew it against the line of cabs on the other + side; but when he got out into the weather he found the + breeze mild and the sun warm. The streets were thronged with + people, and at all the corners there were groups of cloaked + and overcoated talkers, soaking themselves full of the + sunshine. The air throbbed, as always, with the sound of + bells, but it was a mellower and opener sound than before, + and looking at the purple bulk of one of those hills which + seem to rest like clouds at the end of each avenue in + Florence, Colville saw that it was clear of snow. He was + going up through Via Cavour to find Mr. Waters and propose a + walk, but he met him before he had got half-way to San Marco. + </p> + <p> + The old man was at a momentary stand-still, looking up at the + Riccardi Palace, and he received Colville with apparent + forgetfulness of anything odd in his being still in Florence. + "Upon the whole," he said, without preliminary of any sort, + as Colville turned and joined him in walking on, "I don't + know any homicide that more distinctly proves the futility of + assassination as a political measure than that over yonder." + He nodded his head sidewise toward the palace as he shuffled + actively along at Colville's elbow. + </p> + <p> + "You might say that the moment when Lorenzino killed + Alessandro was the most auspicious for a deed of that kind. + The Medici had only recently been restored; Alessandro was + the first ruler in Florence, who had worn a title; no more + reckless, brutal, and insolent tyrant ever lived, and his + right, even such as the Medici might have, to play the despot + was involved in the doubt of his origin; the heroism of the + great siege ought still to have survived in the people who + withstood the forces of the whole German Empire for fifteen + months; it seems as if the taking off of that single wretch + should have ended the whole Medicean domination; but there + was not a voice raised to second the homicide's appeal to the + old love of liberty in Florence. The Medici party were able + to impose a boy of eighteen upon the most fiery democracy + that ever existed, and to hunt down and destroy Alessandro's + murderer at their leisure. No," added the old man + thoughtfully, "I think that the friends of progress must + abandon assassination as invariably useless. The trouble was + not that Alessandro was alive, but that Florence was dead. + Assassination always comes too early or too late in any + popular movement. It may be," said Mr. Waters, with a + carefulness to do justice to assassination which made + Colville smile, "that the modern scientific spirits may be + able to evolve something useful from the principle, but + considering the enormous abuses and perversions to which it + is liable, I am very doubtful of it—very doubtful." + </p> + <p> + Colville laughed. "I like your way of bringing a fresh mind + to all these questions in history and morals, whether they + are conventionally settled or not. Don't you think the modern + scientific spirit could evolve something useful out of the + old classic idea of suicide?" + </p> + <p> + "Perhaps," said Mr. Waters; "I haven't yet thought it over. + The worst thing about suicide—and this must always rank + it below political assassination—is that its interest + is purely personal. No man ever kills himself for the good of + others." + </p> + <p> + "That's certainly against it. We oughtn't to countenance such + an abominably selfish practice. But you can't bring that + charge against euthanasy. What have you to say of that?" + </p> + <p> + "I have heard one of the most benevolent and tender-hearted + men I ever knew defend it in cases of hopeless suffering. But + I don't know that I should be prepared to take his ground. + There appears to be something so sacred about human life that + we must respect it even in spite of the prayers of the + sufferer who asks us to end his irremediable misery." + </p> + <p> + "Well," said Colville, "I suspect we must at least class + murder with the ballet as a means of good. One might say + there was still some virtue in the primal, eldest curse + against bloodshed." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I don't by any means deny those things," said the old + man, with the air of wishing to be scrupulously just. "Which + way are you walking?" + </p> + <p> + "Your way, if you will let me," replied Colville. "I was + going to your house to ask you to take a walk with me." + </p> + <p> + "Ah, that's good. I was reading of the great siege last + night, and I thought of taking a look at Michelangelo's + bastions. Let us go together, if you don't think you'll find + it too fatiguing." + </p> + <p> + "I shall be ashamed to complain if I do." + </p> + <p> + "And you didn't go to Rome after all?" said Mr. Waters. + </p> + <p> + "No; I couldn't face the landlord with a petition so + preposterous as mine. I told him that I found I had no money + to pay his bill till I had seen my banker, and as he didn't + propose that I should send him the amount back from Rome, I + stayed. Landlords have their limitations; they are not + imaginative, as a class." + </p> + <p> + "Well, a day more will make no great difference to you, I + suppose," said the old man, "and a day less would have been a + loss to me. I shall miss you." + </p> + <p> + "Shall you, indeed?" asked Colville, with a grateful stir of + the heart. "It's very nice of you to say that." + </p> + <p> + "Oh no. I meet few people who are willing to look at life + objectively with me, and I have fancied some such willingness + in you. What I chiefly miss over here is a philosophic lift + in the human mind, but probably that is because my + opportunities of meeting the best minds are few, and my means + of conversing with them are small. If I had not the whole + past with me, I should feel lonely at times." + </p> + <p> + "And is the past such good company always?". + </p> + <p> + "Yes, in a sense it is. The past is humanity set free from + circumstance, and history studied where it was once life is + the past rehumanised." + </p> + <p> + As if he found this rarefied air too thin for his lungs, + Colville made some ineffectual gasps at response, and the old + man continued: "What I mean is that I meet here the + characters I read of, and commune with them before their + errors were committed, before they had condemned themselves + to failure, while they were still wise and sane, and still + active and vital forces." + </p> + <p> + "Did they all fail? I thought some of the bad fellows had a + pretty fair worldly success?" + </p> + <p> + "The blossom of decay." + </p> + <p> + "Oh! what black pessimism!" + </p> + <p> + "Not at all! Men fail, but man succeeds. I don't know what it + all means, or any part of it; but I have had moods in which + it seemed as if the whole, secret of the mystery were about + to flash upon me. Walking along in the full sun, in the midst + of men, or sometimes in the solitude of midnight, poring over + a book, and thinking of quite other things, I have felt that + I had almost surprised it." + </p> + <p> + "But never quite?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, it isn't too late yet." + </p> + <p> + "I hope you won't have your revelation before I get away from + Florence, or I shall see them burning you here like the great + <i>frate</i>." + </p> + <p> + They had been walking down the Via Calzioli from the Duomo, + and now they came out into the Piazza della Signoria, + suddenly, as one always seems to do, upon the rise of the old + palace and the leap of its tower into the blue air. The + history of all Florence is there, with memories of every + great time in bronze or marble, but the supreme presence is + the martyr who hangs for ever from the gibbet over the + quenchless fire in the midst. + </p> + <p> + "Ah, they <i>had</i> to kill him!" sighed the old man. "It + has always been so with the benefactors. They have always + meant mankind more good than any one generation can bear, and + it must turn upon them and destroy them." + </p> + <p> + "How will it be with you, then, when you have read us 'the + riddle of the painful earth'?" + </p> + <p> + "That will be so simple that every one will accept it + willingly and gladly, and wonder that no one happened to + think of it before. And, perhaps, the world is now grown old + enough and docile enough to receive the truth without + resentment." + </p> + <p> + "I take back my charge of pessimism," said Colville. "You are + an optimist of the deepest dye." + </p> + <p> + They walked out of the Piazza and down to the Lung' Arno, + through the corridor of the Uffizzi, where the illustrious + Florentines stand in marble under the arches, all reconciled + and peaceful and equal at last. Colville shivered a little as + he passed between the silent ranks of the statues. + </p> + <p> + "I can't stand those fellows, to-day. They seem to feel such + a smirk satisfaction at having got out of it all." + </p> + <p> + They issued upon the river, and he went to the parapet and + looked down on the water. "I wonder," he mused aloud, "if it + has the same Sunday look to these Sabbathless Italians as it + has to us." + </p> + <p> + "No; Nature isn't puritan," replied the old minister. + </p> + <p> + "Not at Haddam East Village?" + </p> + <p> + "No; there less than here; for she's had to make a harder + fight for her life there." + </p> + <p> + "Ah, then you believe in Nature—you're a friend of + Nature?" asked Colville, following the lines of an oily swirl + in the current with indolent eye. + </p> + <p> + "Only up to a certain point." Mr. Waters seemed to be patient + of any direction which the other might be giving the talk. + "Nature is a savage. She has good impulses, but you can't + trust her altogether." + </p> + <p> + "Do you know," said Colville, "I don't think there's very + much of her left in us after we reach a certain point in + life? She drives us on at a great pace for a while, and then + some fine morning we wake up and find that Nature has got + tired of us and has left us to taste and conscience. And + taste and conscience are by no means so certain of what they + want you to do as Nature was." + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said the minister, "I see what you mean." He joined + Colville in leaning on the parapet, and he looked out on the + river as if he saw his meaning there. "But by the time we + reach that point in life most of us have got the direction + which Nature meant us to take, and there's no longer any need + of her driving us on." + </p> + <p> + "And what about the unlucky fellows who haven't got the + direction, or haven't kept it?" + </p> + <p> + "They had better go back to it." + </p> + <p> + "But if Nature herself seemed to change her mind about you?" + </p> + <p> + "Ah, you mean persons of weak will. They are a great curse to + themselves and to everybody else." + </p> + <p> + "I'm not so sure of that," said Colville. "I've seen cases in + which a strong will looked very much more like the devil." + </p> + <p> + "Yes, a perverted will. But there can be no good without a + strong will. A weak will means inconstancy. It means, even in + good, good attempted and relinquished, which is always a + terrible thing, because it is sure to betray some one who + relied upon its accomplishment." + </p> + <p> + "And in evil? Perhaps the evil, attempted and relinquished, + turns into good." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, never!" replied the minister fervently. "There is + something very mysterious in what we call evil. Apparently it + has infinitely greater force and persistence than good. I + don't know why it should be so. But so it appears." + </p> + <p> + "You'll have the reason of that along with the rest of the + secret when your revelation comes," said Colville, with a + smile. He lifted his eyes from the river, and looked up over + the clustering roofs beyond it to the hills beyond them, + flecked to the crest of their purple slopes with the white of + villas and villages. As if something in the beauty of the + wonderful prospect had suggested the vision of its opposite, + he said, dreamily, "I don't think I shall go to Rome + to-morrow, after all. I will go to Des Vaches! Where did you + say you were walking, Mr. Waters? Oh yes! You told me. I will + cross the bridge with you. But I couldn't stand anything + quite so vigorous as the associations of the siege this + afternoon. I'm going to the Boboli Gardens, to debauch myself + with a final sense of nerveless despotism, as it expressed + itself in marble allegory and formal alleys. The fact is that + if I stay with you any longer I shall tell you something that + I'm too old to tell and you're too old to hear." The old man + smiled, but offered no urgence or comment, and at the thither + end of the bridge Colville said hastily, "Good-bye. If you + ever come to Des Vaches, look me up." + </p> + <p> + "Good-bye," said the minister. "Perhaps we shall meet in + Florence again." + </p> + <p> + "No, no. Whatever happens, that won't." + </p> + <p> + They shook hands and parted. Colville stood a moment, + watching the slight bent figure of the old man as he moved + briskly up the Via de' Bardi, turning his head from, side to + side, to look at the palaces as he passed, and so losing + himself in the dim, cavernous curve of the street. As soon as + he was out of sight, Colville had an impulse to hurry after + him and rejoin him; then he felt like turning about and going + back to his hotel. + </p> + <p> + But he shook himself together into the shape of resolution, + however slight and transient. "I must do <i>something</i> I + intended to do," he said, between his set teeth, and pushed + on up through the Via Guicciardini. "I will go to the Boboli + because I <i>said</i> I would." + </p> + <p> + As he walked along, he seemed to himself to be merely + crumbling away in this impulse and that, in one abortive + intent and another. What did it all mean? Had he been his + whole life one of these weak wills which are a curse to + themselves and others, and most a curse when they mean the + best? Was that the secret of his failure in life? But for + many years he had seemed to succeed, to be as other men were, + hard, practical men; he had once made a good newspaper, which + was certainly not a dream of romance. Had he given that up at + last because he was a weak will? And now was he running away + from Florence because his will was weak? He could look back + to that squalid tragedy of his youth, and see that a more + violent, a more determined man could have possessed himself + of the girl whom he had lost. And now would it not be more + manly, if more brutal, to stay here, where a hope, however + fleeting, however fitful, of what might have been, had + revisited him in the love of this young girl? He felt sure, + if anything were sure, that something in him, in spite of + their wide disparity of years, had captured her fancy, and + now, in his abasement, he felt again the charm of his own + power over her. They were no farther apart in years than many + a husband and wife; they would grow more and more together; + there was youth enough in his heart yet; and who was pushing + him away from her, forbidding him this treasure that he had + but to put out his hand and make his own? Some one whom + through all his thoughts of another he was trying to please, + but whom he had made finally and inexorably his enemy. Better + stay, then, something said to him; and when he answered, "I + will," something else reminded him that this also was not + willing but unwilling. + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p><a name="XIV"><!--Marker--></a> + <h2> + XIV + </h2><br> + <br> + + <p> + When he entered the beautiful old garden, its benison of + peace fell upon his tumult, and he began to breathe a freer + air, reverting to his purpose to be gone in the morning and + resting in it, as he strolled up the broad curve of its alley + from the gate. He had not been there since he walked there + with one now more like a ghost to him than any of the dead + who had since died. It was there that she had refused him; he + recalled with a grim smile the awkwardness of getting back + with her to the gate from the point, far within the garden, + where he had spoken. Except that this had happened in the + fall, and now it was early spring, there seemed no change + since then; the long years that had elapsed were like a + winter between. + </p> + <p> + He met people in groups and singly loitering through the + paths, and chiefly speaking English; but no one spoke to him, + and no one invaded the solitude in which he walked. But the + garden itself seemed to know him, and to give him a tacit + recognition; the great, foolish grotto before the gate, with + its statues by Bandinelli, and the fantastic effects of + drapery and flesh in party-coloured statues lifted high on + either side of the avenue; the vast shoulder of wall, covered + thick with ivy and myrtle, which he passed on his way to the + amphitheatre behind the palace; the alternate figures and + urns on their pedestals in the hemicycle, as if the urns were + placed there to receive the ashes of the figures when they + became extinct; the white statues or the colossal busts set + at the ends of the long, alleys against black curtains of + foliage; the big fountain, with its group in the centre of + the little lake, and the meadow, quiet and sad, that + stretched away on one side from this; the keen light under + the levels of the dense pines and ilexes; the paths striking + straight on either hand from the avenue through which he + sauntered, and the walk that coiled itself through the depths + of the plantations; all knew him, and from them and from the + winter neglect which was upon the place distilled a subtle + influence, a charm, an appeal belonging to that combination + of artifice and nature which is perfect only in an Italian + garden under an Italian sky. He was right in the name which + he mockingly gave the effect before he felt it; it was a + debauch, delicate, refined, of unserious pensiveness, a + smiling melancholy, in which he walked emancipated from his + harassing hopes, and keeping only his shadowy regrets. + </p> + <p> + Colville did not care to scale the easy height from which you + have the magnificent view, conscious of many photographs, of + Florence. He wandered about the skirts of that silent meadow, + and seeing himself unseen, he invaded its borders far enough + to pluck one of those large scarlet anemones, such as he had + given his gentle enemy. It was tilting there in the breeze + above the unkempt grass, and the grass was beginning to feel + the spring, and to stir and stretch itself after its winter + sleep; it was sprinkled with violets, but these he did not + molest. He came back to a stained and mossy stone bench on + the avenue, fronting a pair of rustic youths carved in stone, + who had not yet finished some game in which he remembered + seeing them engaged when he was there before. He had not + walked fast, but he had walked far, and was warm enough to + like the whiffs of soft wind on his uncovered head. The + spring was coming; that was its breath, which you know + unmistakably in Italy after all the kisses that winter gives. + Some birds were singing in the trees; down an alley into + which he could look, between the high walls of green, he + could see two people in flirtation: he waited patiently till + the young man should put his arm round the girl's waist, for + the fleeting embrace from which she pushed it and fled + further down the path. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, it's spring," thought Colville; and then, with the + selfishness of the troubled soul, he wished that it might be + winter still and indefinitely. It occurred to him now that he + should not go back to Des Vaches, for he did not know what he + should do there. He would go to New York: though he did not + know what he should do in New York, either. + </p> + <p> + He became tired of looking at the people who passed, and of + speculating about them through the second consciousness which + enveloped the sad substance of his misgivings like an + atmosphere; and he let his eyelids fall, as he leaned his + head back against the tree behind his bench. Then their + voices pursued him through the twilight that he had made + himself, and forced him to the same weary conjecture as if he + had seen their faces. He heard gay laughter, and laughter + that affected gaiety; the tones of young men in earnest + disquisition reached him through the veil, and the talk, + falling to whisper, of girls, with the names of men in it; + sums of money, a hundred francs, forty thousand francs, came + in high tones; a husband and wife went by quarrelling in the + false security of English, and snapping at each other as + confidingly as if in the sanctuary of home. The man bade the + woman not be a fool, and she asked him how she was to-endure + his company if she was not a fool. + </p> + <p> + Colville opened his eyes to look after them, when a voice + that he knew called out, "Why, it is Mr. Colville!" + </p> + <p> + It was Mrs. Amsden, and pausing with her, as if they had + passed him in doubt, and arrested themselves when they had + got a little way by, were Effie Bowen and Imogens Graham. The + old lady had the child by the hand, and the girl stood a few + paces apart from them. She was one of those beauties who have + the property of looking very plain at times, and Colville, + who had seen her in more than one transformation, now beheld + her somehow clumsy of feature, and with the youth gone from + her aspect. She seemed a woman of thirty, and she wore an + unbecoming walking dress of a fashion that contributed to + this effect of age. Colville was aware afterward of having + wished that she was really as old and plain as she looked. + </p> + <p> + He had to come forward, and put on the conventional delight + of a gentleman meeting lady friends. + </p> + <p> + "It's remarkable how your having your eyes shut estranged + you," said Mrs. Amsden. "Now, if you had let me see you + oftener in church, where people close their eyes a good deal + for one purpose or another, I should have known you at once." + </p> + <p> + "I hope you haven't lost a great deal of time, as it is, Mrs. + Amsden," said Colville. "Of course I should have had my eyes + open if I had known you were going by." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, don't apologise!" cried the old thing, with ready + enjoyment of his tone. + </p> + <p> + "I don't apologise for not being recognisable; I apologise + for being visible," said Colville, with some shapeless + impression that he ought to excuse his continued presence in + Florence to Imogene, but keeping his eyes upon Mrs. Amsden, + to whom what he said could not be intelligible. "I ought to + be in Turin to-day." + </p> + <p> + "In Turin! Are you going away from Florence?" + </p> + <p> + "I'm going home." + </p> + <p> + "Why, did <i>you</i> know that?" asked the old lady of + Imogene, who slightly nodded, and then of Effie, who also + assented. "Really, the silence of the Bowen family in regard + to the affairs of others is extraordinary. There never was a + family more eminently qualified to live in Florence. I dare + say that if I saw a little more of them, I might hope to + reach the years of discretion myself some day. <i>Why</i> are + you going away? (You see I haven't reached them yet!) Are you + tired of Florence already?" + </p> + <p> + "No," said Colville passively; "Florence is tired of me." + </p> + <p> + "You're quite sure?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes; there's no mistaking one of her sex on such a point." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Amsden laughed. "Ah, a great many people mistake us, + both ways. And you're really going back to America. What in + the world for?" + </p> + <p> + "I haven't the least idea." + </p> + <p> + "Is America fonder of you than Florence?" + </p> + <p> + "She's never told her love. I suspect it's merely that she's + more used to me." + </p> + <p> + They were walking, without any volition of his, down the + slope of the broad avenue to the fountain, where he had + already been. + </p> + <p> + "Is your mother well?" he asked of the little girl. It seemed + to him that he had better not speak to Imogene, who still + kept that little distance from the rest, and get away as soon + as he decently could. + </p> + <p> + "She has a headache," said Effie. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I'm sorry," returned Colville. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, she deputed me to take her young people out for an + airing," said Mrs. Amsden; "and Miss Graham decided us for + the Boboli, where she hadn't been yet. I've done what I could + to make the place attractive. But what is an old woman to do + for a girl in a garden? We ought to have brought some other + young people—some of the Inglehart boys. But we're + respectable, we Americans abroad; we're decorous, above all + things; and I don't know about meeting <i>you</i> here, Mr. + Colville. It has a very bad appearance. Are you sure that you + didn't know I was to go by here at exactly half-past four?" + </p> + <p> + "I was living from breath to breath in the expectation of + seeing you. You must have noticed how eagerly I was looking + out for you." + </p> + <p> + "Yes, and with a single red anemone in your hand, so that I + should know you without being obliged to put on my + spectacles." + </p> + <p> + "You divine everything, Mrs. Amsden," he said, giving her the + flower. + </p> + <p> + "I shall make my brags to Mrs. Bowen when I see her," said + the old lady. "How far into the country did you walk for + this?" + </p> + <p> + "As far as the meadow yonder." + </p> + <p> + They had got down to the sheet of water from which the + sea-horses of the fountain sprang, and the old lady sank upon + a bench near it. Colville held out his hand toward Effie. "I + saw a lot of violets over there in the grass." + </p> + <p> + "Did you?" She put her hand eagerly into his, and they + strolled off together. After a first motion to accompany + them, Imogene sat down beside Mrs. Amsden, answering quietly + the talk of the old lady, and seeming in nowise concerned + about the expedition for violets. Except for a dull first + glance, she did not look that way. Colville stood in the + border of the grass, and the child ran quickly hither and + thither in it, stooping from time to time upon the flowers. + Then she came out to where he stood, and showed her bunch of + violets, looking up into the face which he bent upon her, + while he trifled with his cane. He had a very fatherly air + with her. + </p> + <p> + "I think I'll go and see what they've found," said Imogene + irrelevantly, to a remark of Mrs. Amsden's about the + expensiveness of Madame Bossi's bonnets. + </p> + <p> + "Well," said the old lady. Imogene started, and the little + girl ran to meet her. She detained Effie with her admiration + of the violets till Colville lounged reluctantly up. "Go and + show them to Mrs. Amsden," she said, giving back the violets, + which she had been smelling. The child ran on. "Mr. Colville, + I want to speak with you." + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said Colville helplessly. + </p> + <p> + "Why are you going away?" + </p> + <p> + "Why? Oh, I've accomplished the objects—or + no-objects—I came for," he said, with dreary + triviality, "and I must hurry away to other fields of + activity." He kept his eyes on her face, which he saw full of + a passionate intensity, working to some sort of overflow. + </p> + <p> + "That is not true, and you needn't say it to spare me. You + are going away because Mrs. Bowen said something to you about + me." + </p> + <p> + "Not quite that," returned Colville gently. + </p> + <p> + "No; it was something that she said to me about you. But it's + the same thing. It makes no difference. I ask you not to go + for that." + </p> + <p> + "Do you know what you are saying, Imogene?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes." + </p> + <p> + am going to-morrow, all the same. But I shan't forget this; + whatever my life is to be, this will make it less unworthy + and less unhappy. If it could buy anything to give you joy, + to add some little grace to the good that must come to you, I + would give it. Some day you'll meet the young fellow whom + you're to make immortal, and you must tell him of an old + fellow who knew you afar off, and understood how to worship + you for an angel of pity and unselfishness. Ah, I hope he'll + understand, too! Good-bye." If he was to fly, that was the + sole instant. He took her hand, and said again, "Good-bye." + And then he suddenly cried, "Imogene, do you wish me to + stay?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes!" said the girl, pouring all the intensity of her face + into that whisper. + </p> + <p> + "Even if there had been nothing said to make me go + away—should you still wish me to stay?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes." + </p> + <p> + He looked her in the starry, lucid eyes, where a divine + fervour deepened. He sighed in nerveless perplexity; it was + she who had the courage. + </p> + <p> + "It's a mistake! You mustn't! I am too old for you! It would + be a wrong and a cruelty! Yes, you must let me go, and forget + me. I have been to blame. If Mrs. Bowen has blamed me, she + was right—I deserved it; I deserved all she could say + against me." + </p> + <p> + "She never said anything against you. Do you think I would + have let her? No; it was I that said it, and I blamed you. It + was because I thought that you were—you were—" + </p> + <p> + "Trifling with you? How could you think that?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes, I know now how it was, and it makes you seem all the + grander to me. Did you think I cared for your being older + than I was? I never cared for it—I never hardly thought + of it after the very first. I tried to make you understand + that, and how it hurt me to have you speak of it. Don't you + think that I could see how good you were? Do you suppose that + all I want is to be happy? I don't care for that—I + despise it, and I always hate myself for seeking my own + pleasure, if I find myself doing it. I have seen enough of + life to know what <i>that</i> comes to! And what hurt me + worst of all was that you seemed to believe that I cared for + nothing but amusing myself, when I wished to be something + better, higher! It's nothing whether you are of my age or + not, if—if—you care for me." + </p> + <p> + "Imogene!" + </p> + <p> + "All that I ask is to be with you, and try to make you forget + what's been sad in your life, and try to be of use to you in + whatever you are doing, and I shall be prouder and gladder of + that than anything that people <i>call</i> happiness." + </p> + <p> + Colville stood holding her hand, while she uttered these + ideas and incoherent repetitions of them, with a deep sense + of powerlessness. "If I believed that I could keep you from + regretting this—" + </p> + <p> + "What should I regret? I won't let you depreciate + yourself—make yourself out not good enough for the + best. Oh, I know how it happened! But now you shall never + think of it again. No; I will not let you. That is the only + way you could make me regret anything." + </p> + <p> + "I am going to stay," said Colville. "But on my own terms. I + will be bound to you, but you shall not be bound to me." + </p> + <p> + "You doubt me! I would rather have you go! No; stay. And let + me prove to you how wrong you are. I mustn't ask more than + that. Only give me the chance to show you how different I am + from what you think—how different you are, too." + </p> + <p> + "Yes. But you must be free." + </p> + <p> + "Well." + </p> + <p> + "What are they doing so long there?" asked Mrs. Amsden of + Effie, putting her glasses to her eyes. "I can't see." + </p> + <p> + "They are just holding hands," said the child, with an easy + satisfaction in the explanation, which perhaps the old lady + did not share. "He always holds my hand when he is with me." + </p> + <p> + "Does he, indeed?" exclaimed Mrs. Amsden, with a cackle. She + added, "That's very polite of him, isn't it? You must be a + great favourite with Mr. Colville. You will miss him when + he's gone." + </p> + <p> + "Yes. He's very nice." + </p> + <p> + Colville and Imogene returned, coming slowly across the + loose, neglected grass toward the old woman's seat. She rose + as they came up. + </p> + <p> + "You don't seem to have succeeded so well in getting flowers + for Miss Graham as for the other ladies. But perhaps you + didn't find her favourite over there. What is your favourite + flower, Miss Graham? Don't say you have none! I didn't know + that I preferred scarlet anemones. Were there no + forget-me-nots over there in the grass?" + </p> + <p> + "There was no occasion for them," answered Colville. + </p> + <p> + "You always did make such pretty speeches!" said the old + lady. "And they have such an orphic character, too; you can + interpret them in so many different ways. Should you mind + saying just what you meant by that one?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes, very much," replied Colville. + </p> + <p> + The old lady laughed with cheerful resignation. She would as + lief report that reply of his as another. Even more than a + man whom she could entangle in his speech she liked a man who + could slip through the toils with unfailing ease. Her talk + with such a man was the last consolation which remained to + her from a life of harmless coquetries. + </p> + <p> + "I will refer it to Mrs. Bowen," she said. "She is a very + wise woman, and she used to know you a great while ago." + </p> + <p> + "If you like, I will do it for you, Mrs. Amsden. I'm going to + see her." + </p> + <p> + "To renew your adieux? Well, why not? Parting is such sweet + sorrow! And if I were a young man I would go to say good-bye + to Mrs. Bowen as often as she would let me. Now tell me + honestly, Mr. Colville, did you ever see such an exquisite, + perfect <i>creature</i>?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, that's asking a good deal." + </p> + <p> + "What?" + </p> + <p> + "To tell you a thing honestly. How did you come here, Mrs. + Amsden?" + </p> + <p> + "In Mrs. Bowen's carriage. I sent it round from the Pitti + entrance to the Porta Romana. It's waiting there now, I + suppose." + </p> + <p> + "I thought you had been corrupted, somehow. Your zeal is + carriage-bought. It <i>is</i> a delightful vehicle. Do you + think you could give me a lift home in it?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes, indeed. I've always a seat for you in my carriage. To + Hotel d'Atene?" + </p> + <p> + "No, to Palazzo Pinti." + </p> + <p> + "This is deliciously mysterious," said Mrs. Amsden, drawing + her shawl up about her shoulders, which, if no longer + rounded, had still a charming droop. One realises in looking + at such old ladies that there are women who could manage + their own skeletons winningly. She put up her glasses, which + were an old-fashioned sort, held to the nose by a handle, and + perused the different persons of the group. "Mr. Colville + concealing an inward trepidation under a bold front; Miss + Graham agitated but firm; the child as much puzzled as the + old woman. I feel that we are a very interesting + group—almost dramatic." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, call us a passage from a modern novel," suggested + Colville, "if you're in the romantic mood. One of Mr. + James's." + </p> + <p> + "Don't you think we ought to be rather more of the great + world for that? I hardly feel up to Mr. James. I should have + said Howells. Only nothing happens in that case!" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, very well; that's the most comfortable way. If it's only + Howells, there's no reason why I shouldn't go with Miss + Graham to show her the view of Florence from the cypress + grove up yonder." + </p> + <p> + "No; he's very particular when he's on Italian ground," said + Mrs. Amsden, rising. "You must come another time with Miss + Graham, and bring Mrs. Bowen. It's quite time we were going + home." + </p> + <p> + The light under the limbs of the trees had begun to grow more + liquid. The currents of warm breeze streaming through the + cooler body of the air had ceased to ruffle the lakelet round + the fountain, and the naiads rode their sea-horses through a + perfect calm. A damp, pierced with the fresh odour of the + water and of the springing grass, descended upon them. The + saunterers through the different paths and alleys were + issuing upon the main avenues, and tending in gathering force + toward the gate. + </p> + <p> + They found Mrs. Bowen's carriage there, and drove first to + her house, beyond which Mrs. Amsden lived in a direct line. + On the way Colville kept up with her the bantering talk that + they always carried on together, and found in it a respite + from the formless future pressing close upon him. He sat with + Effie on the front seat, and he would not look at Imogene's + face, which, nevertheless, was present to some inner vision. + When the porter opened the iron gate below and rang Mrs. + Bowen's bell, and Effie sprang up the stairs before them to + give her mother the news of Mr. Colville's coming, the girl + stole her hand into his. + </p> + <p> + "Shall you—tell her?" + </p> + <p> + "Of course. She must know without an instant's delay." + </p> + <p> + "Yes, yes; that is right. Oh!—Shall I go with you?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes; come!" + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p><a name="XV"><!--Marker--></a> + <h2> + XV + </h2><br> + <br> + + <p> + Mrs. Bowen came in to them, looking pale and pain-worn, as + she did that evening when she would not let Colville go away + with the other tea-taking callers to whom she had made her + headache an excuse. The eyelids which she had always a little + difficulty in lifting were heavy with suffering, and her + pretty smile had an effect of very great remoteness. But + there was no consciousness of anything unusual or unexpected + in his presence expressed in her looks or manner. Colville + had meant to take Imogene by the hand and confront Mrs. Bowen + with an immediate declaration of what had happened; but he + found this impossible, at least in the form of his intention; + he took, instead, the hand of conventional welcome which she + gave him, and he obeyed her in taking provisionally the seat + to which she invited him. At the same time the order of his + words was dispersed in that wonder, whether she suspected + anything, with which he listened to her placid talk about the + weather; she said she had thought it was a chilly day + outdoors; but her headaches always made her very sensitive. + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said Colville, "I supposed it was cold myself till I + went out, for I woke with a tinge of rheumatism." He felt a + strong desire to excuse, to justify what had happened, and he + went on, with a painful sense of Imogene's eyes bent in + bewildered deference upon him. "I started out for a walk with + Mr. Waters, but I left him after we got across the Ponte + Vecchio; he went up to look at the Michelangelo bastions, and + I strolled over to the Boboli Gardens—where I found + your young people." + </p> + <p> + He had certainly brought himself to the point, but he seemed + actually further from it than at first, and he made a + desperate plunge, trying at the same time to keep something + of his habitual nonchalance. "But that doesn't account for my + being here. Imogene accounts for that. She has allowed me to + stay in Florence." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen could not turn paler than her headache had left + her, and she now underwent no change of complexion. But her + throat was not clear enough to say to the end, "Allowed you + to stay in—" The trouble in her throat arrested her + again. + </p> + <p> + Colville became very red. He put out his hand and took + Imogene's, and now his eyes and Mrs. Bowen's met in the kind + of glance in which people intercept and turn each other aside + before they have reached a resting-place in each other's + souls. But at the girl's touch his courage revived—in + some physical sort. "Yes, and if she will let me stay with + her, we are not going to part again." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen did not answer at once, and in the hush Colville + heard the breathing of all three. + </p> + <p> + "Of course," he said, "we wished you to know at once, and I + came in with Imogene to tell you." + </p> + <p> + "What do you wish me," asked Mrs. Bowen, "to do?" + </p> + <p> + Colville forced a nervous laugh. "Really, I'm so little used + to this sort of affair that I don't know whether I have any + wish. Imogene is here with you, and I suppose I supposed you + would wish to do something." + </p> + <p> + "I will do whatever you think best." + </p> + <p> + "Thank you: that's very kind of you." He fell into a silence, + in which he was able only to wish that he knew what was best, + and from which he came to the surface with, "Imogene's family + ought to know, of course." + </p> + <p> + "Yes; they put her in my charge. They will have to know. + Shall I write to them?" + </p> + <p> + "Why, if you will." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, certainly." + </p> + <p> + "Thank you." + </p> + <p> + He had taken to stroking with his right hand the hand of + Imogene which he held in his left, and now he looked round at + her with a glance which it was a relief not to have her meet. + "And till we can hear from them, I suppose you will let me + come to see her?" + </p> + <p> + "You know you have always been welcome here." + </p> + <p> + "Thank you very much." It seemed as if there ought to be + something else to say, but Colville could not think of + anything except: "We wish to act in every way with your + approval, Mrs. Bowen. And I know that you are very particular + in some things"—the words, now that they were said, + struck him as unfortunate, and even vulgar—"and I + shouldn't wish to annoy you—" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I understand. I think it will be—I have no doubt + you will know how to manage all that. It isn't as if you were + both—" + </p> + <p> + "Young?" asked Colville. "No; one of us is quite old enough + to be thoroughly up in the <i>convenances</i>. We are + qualified, I'm afraid, as far as that goes," he added + bitterly, "to set all Florence an example of correct + behaviour." + </p> + <p> + He knew there must be pain in the face which he would not + look at; he kept looking at Mrs. Bowen's face, in which + certainly there was not much pleasure, either. + </p> + <p> + There was another silence, which became very oppressive + before it ended in a question from Mrs. Bowen, who stirred + slightly in her chair, and bent forward as if about to rise + in asking it. "Shall you wish to consider it an engagement?" + </p> + <p> + Colville felt Imogene's hand tremble in his, but he received + no definite prompting from the tremor. "I don't believe I + know what you mean." + </p> + <p> + "I mean, till you have heard from Imogene's mother." + </p> + <p> + "I hadn't thought of that. Perhaps under the + circumstances—" The tremor died out of the hand he + held; it lay lax between his. "What do you say, Imogene?" + </p> + <p> + "I can't say anything. Whatever you think will be + right—for me." + </p> + <p> + "I wish to do what will seem right and fair to your mother." + </p> + <p> + "Yes." + </p> + <p> + Colville heaved a hopeless sigh. Then with a deep inward + humiliation, he said, "Perhaps if you know Imogene's mother, + Mrs. Bowen, you can suggest—advise—You—" + </p> + <p> + "You must excuse me; I can't suggest or advise anything. I + must leave you perfectly free." She rose from her chair, and + they, both rose too from the sofa on which he had seated + himself at Imogene's side. "I shall have to leave you, I'm + afraid; my head aches still a little. Imogene!" She advanced + toward the girl, who stood passively letting her come the + whole distance. As if sensible of the rebuff expressed in + this attitude, she halted a very little. Then she added, "I + hope you will be very happy," and suddenly cast her arms + round the girl, and stood long pressing her face into her + neck. When she released her, Colville trembled lest she + should be going to give him her hand in congratulation. But + she only bowed slightly to him, with a sidelong, aversive + glance, and walked out of the room with a slow, rigid pace, + like one that controls a tendency to giddiness. + </p> + <p> + Imogene threw herself on Colville's' breast. It gave him a + shock, as if he were letting her do herself some wrong. But + she gripped him fast, and began to sob and to cry. "Oh! oh! + oh!" + </p> + <p> + "What is it?—what is it, my poor girl?" he murmured. + "Are you unhappy? Are you sorry? Let it all end, then!" + </p> + <p> + "No, no; it isn't that! But I am very unhappy—yes, + very, very unhappy! Oh, I didn't suppose I should ever feel + so toward any one. I hate her!" + </p> + <p> + "You hate her?" gasped Colville. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, I hate her. And she—she is so good to me! It must + be that I've done her some deadly wrong, without knowing it, + or I couldn't hate her as I know I do." + </p> + <p> + "Oh no," said Colville soothingly; "that's just your fancy. + You haven't harmed her, and you don't hate her." + </p> + <p> + "Yes, yes, I do! You can't understand how I feel toward her." + </p> + <p> + "But you can't feel so toward her long," he urged, dealing as + he might with what was wholly a mystery to him. She is so + good—" + </p> + <p> + "It only makes my badness worse, and makes me hate her more." + </p> + <p> + "I don't understand. But you're excited now. When you're + calmer you'll feel differently, of course. I've kept you + restless and nervous a long time, poor child; but now our + peace begins, and everything will be bright and—" He + stopped: the words had such a very hollow sound. + </p> + <p> + She pushed herself from him, and dried her eyes. "Oh yes." + </p> + <p> + "And, Imogene—perhaps—perhaps—Or, no; never + mind, now. I must go away—" She looked at him, + frightened but submissive. "But I will be back to-night, or + perhaps to-morrow morning. I want to think—to give you + time to think. I don't want to be selfish about you—I + want to consider you, all the more because you won't consider + yourself. Good-bye." He stooped over and kissed her hair. + Even in this he felt like a thief; he could not look at the + face she lifted to his. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen sent word from her room that she was not coming to + dinner, and Imogene did not come till the dessert was put on. + Then she found Effie Bowen sitting alone at the table, and + served in serious formality by the man, whom she had + apparently felt it right to repress, for they were both + silent. The little girl had not known how to deny herself an + excess of the less wholesome dishes, and she was perhaps + anticipating the regret which this indulgence was to bring, + for she was very pensive. + </p> + <p> + "Isn't mamma coming at <i>all</i>?" she asked plaintively, + when Imogene sat down, and refused everything but a cup of + coffee. "Well," she went on, "I can't make out what is coming + to this family. You were all crying last night because Mr. + Colville was going away, and now, when he's going to stay, + it's just as bad. I don't think you make it very pleasant for + <i>him</i>. I should think he would be perfectly puzzled by + it, after he's done so much to please you all. I don't + believe he thinks it's very polite. I suppose it <i>is</i> + polite, but it doesn't seem so. And he's always so cheerful + and nice. I should think he would want to visit in some + family where there was more amusement. There used to be + plenty in this family, but now it's as dismal! The first of + the winter you and mamma used to be so pleasant when he came, + and would try everything to amuse him, and would let me come + in to get some of the good of it; but now you seem to fly + every way as soon as he comes in sight of the house, and I'm + poked off in holes and corners before he can open his lips. + And I've borne it about as long as I can. I would rather be + back in Vevay. Or anywhere." At this point her own pathos + overwhelmed her, and the tears rolling down her cheeks + moistened the crumbs of pastry at the corners of her pretty + mouth. "What was so strange, I should like to know, about his + staying, that mamma should pop up like a ghost, when I told + her he had come home with us, and grab me by the wrist, and + twitch me about, and ask me all sorts of questions I couldn't + answer, and frighten me almost to death? I haven't got over + it yet. And I don't think it's very nice. It used to be a + very polite family, and pleasant with each other, and always + having something agreeable going on in it; but if it keeps on + very much longer in this way, I shall think the Bowens are + beginning to lose their good-breeding. I suppose that if Mr. + Colville were to go down on his knees to mamma and ask her to + let him take me somewhere now, she wouldn't do it." She + pulled her handkerchief out of her pocket, and dried her eyes + on a ball of it. "I don't see what <i>you've</i> been crying + about, Imogene. <i>You've</i> got nothing to worry you." + </p> + <p> + "I'm not very well, Effie," returned the girl gently. "I + haven't been well all day." + </p> + <p> + "It seems to me that nobody is well any more. I don't believe + Florence is a very healthy place. Or at least this house + isn't. <i>I</i> think it must be the drainage. If we keep on, + I suppose we shall all have diphtheria. Don't you, Imogene?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes," asserted the girl distractedly. + </p> + <p> + "The girls had it at Vevay frightfully. And none of them were + as strong afterward. Some of the parents came and took them + away; but Madame Schebres never let mamma know. Do you think + that was right?" + </p> + <p> + "No; it was very wrong." + </p> + <p> + "I suppose Mr. Colville will have it if we do. That is, if he + keeps coming here. Is he coming any more?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes; he's coming to-morrow morning." + </p> + <p> + "<i>Is</i> he?" A smile flickered over the rueful face. "What + time is he coming?" + </p> + <p> + "I don't know exactly," said Imogene, listlessly stirring her + coffee. "Some time in the forenoon." + </p> + <p> + "Do you suppose he's going to take us anywhere?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes—I think so. I can't tell exactly." + </p> + <p> + "If he asks me to go somewhere, will you tease mamma? She + always lets you, Imogene, and it seems sometimes as if she + just took a pleasure in denying me." + </p> + <p> + "You mustn't talk so of your mother, Effie." + </p> + <p> + "No; I wouldn't to <i>every</i>body. I know that she means + for the best; but I don't believe she understands how much I + suffer when she won't let me go with Mr. Colville. Don't you + think he's about the nicest gentleman we know, Imogene?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes; he's very kind." + </p> + <p> + "And I think he's handsome. A good many people would consider + him old-looking, and of course he isn't so young as Mr. + Morton was, or the Inglehart boys; but that makes him all the + easier to get along with. And his being just a little fat, + that way, seems to suit so well with his character." The + smiles were now playing across the child's face, and her eyes + sparkling. "<i>I</i> think Mr, Colville would make a good + Saint Nicholas—the kind they have going down chimneys + in America. I'm going to tell him, for the next veglione. It + would be such a nice surprise." + </p> + <p> + "No, better not tell him that," suggested Imogene. + </p> + <p> + "Do you think he wouldn't like it?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes." + </p> + <p> + "Well, it would become him. How old do you suppose he is, + Imogene? Seventy-five?" + </p> + <p> + "What an idea!" cried the girl fiercely. "He's forty-one." + </p> + <p> + "I didn't know they had those little jiggering lines at the + corners of their eyes so quick. But forty-one is pretty old, + isn't it? Is Mr. Waters—" + </p> + <p> + "Effie," said her mother's voice at the door behind her, + "will you ring for Giovanni, and tell him to bring me a cup + of coffee in here?" She spoke from the <i>portière</i> + of the <i>salotto</i>. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, mamma. I'll bring it to you myself." + </p> + <p> + "Thank you, dear," Mrs. Bowen called from within. + </p> + <p> + The little girl softly pressed her hands together. "I + <i>hope</i> she'll let me stay up! I feel so excited, and I + hate to lie and think so long before I get to sleep. Couldn't + you just hint a little to her that I might stay up? It's + Sunday night." + </p> + <p> + "I can't, Effie," said Imogene. "I oughtn't to interfere with + any of your mother's rules." + </p> + <p> + The child sighed submissively and took the coffee that + Giovanni brought to her. She and Imogene went into the + <i>salotto</i> together. Mrs. Bowen was at her writing-desk. + "You can bring the coffee here, Effie," she said. + </p> + <p> + "Must I go to bed at once, mamma?" asked the child, setting + the cup carefully down. + </p> + <p> + The mother looked distractedly up from her writing. "No; you + may sit up a while," she said, looking back to her writing. + </p> + <p> + "How long, mamma?" pleaded the little girl. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, till you're sleepy. It doesn't matter <i>now</i>." + </p> + <p> + She went on writing; from time to time she tore up what she + had written. + </p> + <p> + Effie softly took a book from the table, and perching herself + on a stiff, high chair, bent over it and began to read. + </p> + <p> + Imogene sat by the hearth, where a small fire was pleasant in + the indoor chill of an Italian house, even after so warm a + day as that had been. She took some large beads of the strand + she wore about her neck into her mouth, and pulled at the + strand listlessly with her hand while she watched the fire. + Her eyes wandered once to the child. + </p> + <p> + "What made you take such an uncomfortable chair, Effie?" + </p> + <p> + Effie shut her book over her hand. "It keeps me wakeful + longer," she whispered, with a glance at her mother from the + corner of her eye. + </p> + <p> + "I don't see why any one should wish to be wakeful," sighed + the girl. + </p> + <p> + When Mrs. Bowen tore up one of her half-written pages Imogene + started nervously forward, and then relapsed again into her + chair. At last Mrs. Bowen seemed to find the right phrases + throughout, and she finished rather a long letter, and read + it over to herself. Then she said, without leaving her desk, + "Imogene, I've been trying to write to your mother. Will you + look at this?" + </p> + <p> + She held the sheet over her shoulder, and Imogene came + languidly and took it; Mrs. Bowen dropped her face forward on + the desk, into her hands, while Imogene was reading. + </p> + <p> + "FLORENCE, <i>March</i> 10, 18— + </p> + <p> + "Dear Mrs. Graham,—I have some very important news to + give you in regard to Imogene, and as there is no way of + preparing you for it, I will tell you at once that it relates + to her marriage. + </p> + <p> + "She has met at my house a gentleman whom I knew in Florence + when I was here before, and of whom I never knew anything but + good. We have seen him very often, and I have seen nothing in + him that I could not approve. He is Mr. Theodore Colville, of + Prairie des Vaches, Indiana, where he was for many years a + newspaper editor; but he was born somewhere in New England. + He is a very cultivated, interesting man; and though not + exactly a society man, he is very agreeable and refined in + his manners. I am sure his character is irreproachable, + though he is not a member of any church. In regard to his + means I know nothing whatever, and can only infer from his + way of life that he is in easy circumstances. + </p> + <p> + "The whole matter has been a surprise to me, for Mr. Colville + is some twenty-one or two years older than Imogene, who is + very young in her feelings for a girl of her age. If I could + have realised anything like a serious attachment between them + sooner, I would have written before. Even now I do not know + whether I am to consider them engaged or not. No doubt + Imogene will write you more fully. + </p> + <p> + "Of course I would rather not have had anything of the kind + happen while have been careless or imprudent about her. I + interfered as far as I could, at the first moment I could, + but it appears that it was then too late to prevent what has + followed.—Yours sincerely, EVALINA BOWEN." + </p> + <p> + Imogene read the letter twice over, and then she said, "Why + isn't he a society man?" + </p> + <p> + Probably Mrs. Bowen expected this sort of approach. "I don't + think a society man would have undertaken to dance the + Lancers as he did at Madam Uccelli's," she answered + patiently, without lifting her head. + </p> + <p> + Imogene winced, but "I should despise him if he were merely a + society man," she said. "I have seen enough of them. I think + it's better to be intellectual and good." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen made no reply, and the girl went on. "And as to + his being older, I don't see what difference it makes. If + people are in sympathy, then they are of the same age, no + difference how much older than one the other is. I have + always heard that." She urged this as if it were a question. + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + "And how should his having been a newspaper editor be + anything against him?" + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen lifted her face and stared at the girl in + astonishment. "Who said it was against him?" + </p> + <p> + "You hint as much. The whole letter is against him." + </p> + <p> + "Imogene!" + </p> + <p> + "Yes! Every word! You make him out perfectly detestable. I + don't know why you should hate <i>him</i>, He's done + everything he could to satisfy you." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen rose from her desk, putting her hand to her + forehead, as if to soften a shock of headache that her change + of posture had sent there. "I will leave the letter with you, + and you can send it or not as you think best. It's merely a + formality, my writing to your mother. Perhaps you'll see it + differently in the morning. Effie!" she called to the child, + who with her book shut upon her hand had been staring at them + and listening intently. "It's time to go to bed now." + </p> + <p> + When Effie stood before the glass in her mother's room, and + Mrs. Bowen was braiding her hair and tying it up for the + night, she asked ruefully, "What's the matter with Imogene, + mamma?" + </p> + <p> + "She isn't very happy to-night." + </p> + <p> + "You don't seem very happy either," said the child, watching + her own face as it quivered in the mirror. "I should think + that now Mr. Colville's concluded to stay, we would all be + happy again. But we don't seem to. We're—we're + perfectly demoralised!" It was one of the words she had + picked up from Colville. + </p> + <p> + The quivering face in the glass broke in a passion of tears, + and Effie sobbed herself to sleep. + </p> + <p> + Imogene sat down at Mrs. Bowen's desk, and pushing her letter + away, began to write. + </p> + <p> + "FLORENCE, <i>March</i> 10, 18—. + </p> + <p> + "DEAR MOTHER,—-I inclose a letter from Mrs. Bowen which + will tell you better than I can what I wish to tell. I do not + see how I can add anything that would give you more of an + idea of him, or less, either. No person can be put down in + cold black and white, and not seem like a mere inventory. I + do not suppose you expected me to become engaged when you + sent me out to Florence, and, as Mrs. Bowen says, I don't + know whether I am engaged or not. I will leave it entirely to + Mr. Colville; if he says we are engaged, we are. I am sure he + will do what is best. I only know that he was going away from + Florence because he thought I supposed he was not in earnest, + and I asked him to stay. + </p> + <p> + "I am a good deal excited to-night, and cannot write very + clearly. But I will write soon again, and more at length. + </p> + <p> + "Perhaps something will be decided by that time. With much + love to father, + </p> + <p> + "Your affectionate daughter, + </p> + <p> + "Imogene." + </p> + <p> + She put this letter into an envelope with Mrs. Bowen's, and + leaving it unsealed to show her in the morning, she began to + write again. This time she wrote to a girl with whom she had + been on terms so intimate that when they left school they had + agreed to know each other by names expressive of their + extremely confidential friendship, and to address each other + respectively as Diary and Journal. They were going to write + every day, if only a line or two; and at the end of a year + they were to meet and read over together the records of their + lives as set down in these letters. They had never met since, + though it was now three years since they parted, and they had + not written since Imogene came abroad; that is, Imogene had + not answered the only letter she had received from her friend + in Florence. This friend was a very serious girl, and had + wished to be a minister, but her family would not consent, or + even accept the compromise of studying medicine, which she + proposed, and she was still living at home in a small city of + central New York. Imogene now addressed her— + </p> + <p> + "DEAR DIARY,—You cannot think how far away the events + of this day have pushed the feelings and ideas of the time + when I agreed to write to you under this name. Till now it + seems to me as if I had not changed in the least thing since + we parted, and now I can hardly know myself for the same + person. O dear Di! something very wonderful has come into my + life, and I feel that it rests with me to make it the + greatest blessing to myself and others, or the greatest + misery. If I prove unworthy of it or unequal to it, then I am + sure that nothing but wretchedness will come of it. + </p> + <p> + "I am engaged—yes!—and to a man more than twice + my own age. It is so easy to tell you this, for I know that + your large-mindedness will receive it very differently from + most people, and that you will see it as I do. He is the + noblest of men, though he tries to conceal it under the + light, ironical manner with which he has been faithful to a + cruel disappointment. It was here in Florence, twenty years + ago, that a girl—I am ashamed to call her a + girl—trifled with the priceless treasure that has + fallen to me, and flung it away. You, Di, will understand how + I was first fascinated with the idea of trying to atone to + him here for all the wrong he had suffered. At first it was + only the vaguest suggestion—something like what I had + read in a poem or a novel—that had nothing to do with + me personally, but it grew upon me more and more the more I + saw of him, and felt the witchery of his light, indifferent + manner, which I learned to see was tense with the anguish he + had suffered. She had killed his youth; she had spoiled his + life: if I could revive them, restore them! It came upon me + like a great flash of light at last, and as soon as this + thought took possession of me, I felt my whole being elevated + and purified by it, and I was enabled to put aside with + contempt the selfish considerations that had occurred to me + at first. At first the difference between our ages was very + shocking to me; for I had always imagined it would be some + one young; but when this light broke upon me, I saw that + <i>he</i> was young, younger even than I, as a man is at the + same age with a girl. Sometimes with my experiences, the + fancies and flirtations that every one has and <i>must</i> + have, however one despises them, I felt so <i>old</i> beside + him; for he had been true to one love all his life, and he + had not wavered for a moment. If I could make him forget it, + if I could lift every feather's weight of sorrow from his + breast, if I could help him to complete the destiny, grand + and beautiful as it would have been, which another had + arrested, broken off—don't you see, Di dear, how rich + my reward would be? + </p> + <p> + "And he, how forbearing, how considerate, how anxious for me, + how full of generous warning he has been! always putting me + in mind, at every step, of the difference in years between + us; never thinking of himself, and shrinking so much from + even seeming to control me or sway me, that I don't know + really whether I have not made all the advances! + </p> + <p> + "I cannot write his name yet, and you must not ask it till I + can; and I cannot tell you anything about his looks or his + life without seeming to degrade him, somehow, and make him a + common man like others. + </p> + <p> + "How can I make myself his companion in everything? How can I + convince him that there is no sacrifice for me, and that he + alone is giving up? shall be helped, and I hope that I shall + be tried, for that is the only way for me to be helped. I + feel strong enough for anything that people can say. I should + <i>welcome</i> criticism and opposition from any quarter. But + I can see that <i>he</i> is very sensitive—it comes + from his keen sense of the ridiculous—and if I suffer, + it will be on account of this grand unselfish nature, and I + shall be glad of that. + </p> + <p> + "I know you will understand me, Di, and I am not afraid of + your laughing at these ravings. But if you did I should not + care. It is such a comfort to say these things about him, to + exalt him, and get him in the true light at last. + </p> + <p> + "Your faithful JOURNAL. + </p> + <p> + "I shall tell him about you, one of the first things, and + perhaps he can suggest some way out of your trouble, he has + had so much experience of every kind. You will worship him, + as I do, when you see him; for you will feel at once that he + understands you, and that is such a rest. + </p> + <p> + "J." + </p> + <p> + Before Imogene fell asleep, Mrs. Bowen came to her in the + dark, and softly closed the door that opened from the girl's + room into Effie's. She sat down on the bed, and began to + speak at once, as if she knew Imogene must be awake. "I + thought you would come to me, Imogene; but as you didn't, I + have come to you, for if you can go to sleep with hard + thoughts of me to-night, I can't let you. You need me for + your friend, and I wish to be your friend; it would be wicked + in me to be anything else; I would give the world if your + mother were here; but I tried to make my letter to her + everything that it should be. If you don't think it is, I + will write it over in the morning." + </p> + <p> + "No," said the girl coldly; "it will do very well. I don't + wish to trouble you so much." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, how can you speak so to me? Do you think that I blame + Mr. Colville? Is that it? I don't ask you—I shall never + ask you—how he came to remain, but I know that he has + acted truthfully and delicately. I knew him long before you + did, and no one need take his part with me." This was not + perhaps what Mrs. Bowen meant to say when she began. "I have + told you all along what I thought, but if you imagine that I + am not satisfied with Mr. Colville, you are very much + mistaken. I can't burst out into praises of him to your + mother: that would be very patronising and very bad taste. + Can't you see that it would?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen lingered, as if she expected Imogene to say + something more, but she did not, and Mrs. Bowen rose. "Then I + hope we understand each other," she said, and went out of the + room. + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p><a name="XVI"><!--Marker--></a> + <h2> + XVI + </h2><br> + <br> + + <p> + When Colville came in the morning, Mrs. Bowen received him. + They shook hands, and their eyes met in the intercepting + glance of the night before. + </p> + <p> + "Imogene will be here in a moment," she said, with a + naturalness that made him awkward and conscious. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, there is no haste," he answered uncouthly. "That is, I + am very glad of the chance to speak a moment with you, and to + ask your—to profit by what you think best. I know you + are not very well pleased with me, and I don't know that I + can ever put myself in a better light with you—the true + light. It seems that there are some things we must not do + even for the truth's sake. But that's neither here nor there. + What I am most anxious for is not to take a shadow of + advantage of this child's—of Imogene's inexperience, + and her remoteness from her family. I feel that I must in + some sort protect her from herself. Yes—that is my + idea. But should be very willing, if you thought best, to go + away and stay away till she has heard from her people, and + let her have that time to think it all over again. She is + very young—so much younger than I! Or, if you thought + it better, I would stay, and let her remain free while I held + myself bound to any decision of hers. I am anxious to do what + is right. At the same time"—he smiled + ruefully—"there is such a thing as being so + <i>dis</i>interested that one may seem <i>un</i>interested. I + may leave her so very free that she may begin to suspect that + I want a little freedom myself. What shall I do? I wish to + act with your approval." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen had listened with acquiescence and intelligence + that might well have looked like sympathy, as she sat + fingering the top of her hand-screen, with her eyelids + fallen. She lifted them to say, "I have told you that I will + not advise yon in any way. I cannot. I have no longer any + wish in this matter. I must still remain in the place of + Imogene's mother; but I will do only what you wish. Please + understand that, and don't ask me for advice any more. It is + painful." She drew her lower lip in a little, and let the + screen fall into her lap. + </p> + <p> + "I'm sorry, Mrs. Bowen, to do anything—say + anything—that is painful to you," Colville began. "You + know that I would give the world to please you——" + The words escaped him and left him staring at her, + </p> + <p> + "What are you saying to me, Theodore Colville?" she + exclaimed, flashing a full-eyed glance upon him, and then + breaking into a laugh, as unnatural for her. "Really, I don't + believe you know!" + </p> + <p> + "Heaven knows I meant nothing but what I said," he answered, + struggling stupidly with a confusion of desires which every + man but no woman will understand. After eighteen hundred + years, the man is still imperfectly monogamous. "Is there + anything wrong in it?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh no! Not for you," she said scornfully. + </p> + <p> + "I am very much in earnest," he went on hopelessly, "in + asking your opinion, your help, in regard to how I shall + treat this affair." + </p> + <p> + "And I am still more in earnest in telling you that I will + give you no opinion, no help. I forbid you to recur to the + subject." He was silent, unable to drop his eyes from hers. + "But for her," continued Mrs. Bowen, "I will do anything in + my power. If she asks my advice I will give it, and I will + give her all the help I can." + </p> + <p> + "Thank you," said Colville vaguely. + </p> + <p> + "I will not have your thanks," promptly retorted Mrs. Bowen, + "for I mean you no kindness. I am trying to do my duty to + Imogene, and when that is ended, all is ended. There is no + way now for you to please me—as you call + it—except to keep her from regretting what she has + done." + </p> + <p> + "Do you think I shall fail in that?" he demanded indignantly. + </p> + <p> + "I can offer you no opinion. I can't tell what you will do." + </p> + <p> + "There are two ways of keeping her from regretting what she + has done; and perhaps the simplest and best way would be to + free her from the consequences, as far as they're involved in + me," said Colville. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen dropped herself back in her armchair. "If you + choose to force these things upon me, I am a woman, and can't + help myself. Especially, I can't help myself against a + guest." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I will relieve you of my presence," said Colville. "I've + no wish to force anything upon you—least of all + myself." He rose, and moved toward the door. + </p> + <p> + She hastily intercepted him. "Do you think I will let you go + without seeing Imogene? Do you understand me so little as + that? It's <i>too late</i> for you to go! You know what I + think of all this, and I know, better than you, what you + think. I shall play my part, and you shall play yours. I have + refused to give you advice or help, and I never shall do it. + But I know what my duty to her is, and I will fulfil it. No + matter how distasteful it is to either of us, you must come + here as before. The house is as free to you as + ever—freer. And we are to be as good friends as + ever—better. You can see Imogene alone or in my + presence, and, as far as I am concerned, you shall consider + yourself engaged or not, as you choose. Do you understand?" + </p> + <p> + "Not in the least," said Colville, in the ghost of his old + bantering manner. "But don't explain, or I shall make still + less of it." + </p> + <p> + "I mean simply that I do it for Imogene and not for you." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I understand that you don't do it for me." + </p> + <p> + At this moment Imogene appeared between the folds of the + <i>portière</i>, and her timid, embarrassed glance + from Mrs. Bowen to Colville was the first gleam of + consolation that had visited him since he parted with her the + night before. A thrill of inexplicable pride and fondness + passed through his heart, and even the compunction that + followed could not spoil its sweetness. But if Mrs. Bowen + discreetly turned her head aside that she need not witness a + tender greeting between them, the precaution was unnecessary. + He merely went forward and took the girl's hand, with a sigh + of relief. "Good morning, Imogene," he said, with a kind of + compassionate admiration. + </p> + <p> + "Good morning," she returned half-inquiringly. + </p> + <p> + She did not take a seat near him, and turned, as if for + instruction, to Mrs. Bowen. It was probably the force of + habit. In any case, Mrs. Bowen's eyes gave no response. She + bowed slightly to Colville, and began, "I must leave Imogene + to entertain you for the present, Mr.—" + </p> + <p> + "No!" cried the girl impetuously; "don't go." Mrs. Bowen + stopped. "I wish to speak with you—with you and Mr. + Colville together. I wish to say—I don't know how to + say it exactly; but I wish to know—You asked him last + night, Mrs. Bowen, whether he wished to consider it an + engagement?" + </p> + <p> + "I thought perhaps you would rather hear from your + mother—" + </p> + <p> + "Yes, I would be glad to know that my mother approved; but if + she didn't, I couldn't help it. Mr. Colville said he was + bound, but I was not. That can't be. I <i>wish</i> to be + bound, if he is." + </p> + <p> + "I don't quite know what you expect me to say." + </p> + <p> + "Nothing," said Imogene. "I merely wished you to know. And I + don't wish you to sacrifice anything to us. If you think + best, Mr. Colville will not see me till I hear from home; + though it won't make any difference with me <i>what</i> I + hear." + </p> + <p> + "There's no reason why you shouldn't meet," said Mrs. Bowen + absently. + </p> + <p> + "If you wish it to have the same appearance as an Italian + engagement——" + </p> + <p> + "No," said Mrs. Bowen, putting her hand to her head with a + gesture she had; "that would be quite unnecessary. It would + be ridiculous under the circumstances. I have thought of it, + and I have decided that the American way is the best." + </p> + <p> + "Very well, then," said Imogene, with the air of summing up; + "then the only question is whether we shall make it known or + not to other people." + </p> + <p> + This point seemed to give Mrs. Bowen greater pause than any. + She was a long time silent, and Colville saw that Imogene was + beginning to chafe at her indecision. Yet he did not see the + moment to intervene in a debate in which he found himself + somewhat ludicrously ignored, as if the affair were solely + the concern of these two women, and none of his. + </p> + <p> + "Of course, Mrs. Bowen," said the girl haughtily, "if it will + be disagreeable to you to have it known——" + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen blushed delicately—a blush of protest and of + generous surprise, or so it seemed to Colville. "I was not + thinking of myself, Imogene. I only wish to consider you. And + I was thinking whether, at this distance from home, you + wouldn't prefer to have your family's approval before you + made it known." + </p> + <p> + "I am sure of their approval. Father will do what mother + says, and she has always said that she would never interfere + with me in—in—such a thing." + </p> + <p> + "Perhaps you would like all the more, then, to show her the + deference of waiting for her consent." + </p> + <p> + Imogene started as if stopped short in swift career; it was + not hard for Colville to perceive that she saw for the first + time the reverse side of a magnanimous impulse. She suddenly + turned to him. + </p> + <p> + "I think Mrs. Bowen is right," he said gravely, in answer to + the eyes of Imogene. He continued, with a flicker of his + wonted mood: "You must consider me a little in the matter. I + have some small shreds of self-respect about me somewhere, + and I would rather not be put in the attitude of defying your + family, or ignoring them." + </p> + <p> + "No," said Imogene, in the same effect of arrest. + </p> + <p> + "When it isn't absolutely necessary," continued Colville. + "Especially as you say there will be no opposition." + </p> + <p> + "Of course," Imogene assented; and in fact what he said was + very just, and he knew it; but he could perceive that he had + suffered loss with her. A furtive glance at Mrs. Bowen did + not assure him that he had made a compensating gain in that + direction, where, indeed, he had no right to wish for any. + </p> + <p> + "Well, then," the girl went on, "it shall be so. We will + wait. It will only be waiting. I ought to have thought of you + before; I make a bad beginning," she said tremulously. "I + supposed I was thinking of you; but I see that I was only + thinking of myself." The tears stood in her eyes. Mrs. Bowen, + quite overlooked in this apology, slipped from the room. + </p> + <p> + "Imogene!" said Colville, coming toward her. + </p> + <p> + She dropped herself upon his shoulder. "Oh, why, why, why am + I so miserable?" + </p> + <p> + "Miserable, Imogene!" he murmured, stroking her beautiful + hair. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, yes! Utterly miserable! It must be because I'm unworthy + of you—unequal every way. If you think so, cast me off + at once. Don't be weakly merciful!" + </p> + <p> + The words pierced his heart. "I would give the world to make + you happy, my child!" he said, with perfidious truth, and a + sigh that came from the bottom of his soul. "Sit down here by + me," he said, moving to the sofa; and with whatever obscure + sense of duty to her innocent self-abandon, he made a space + between them, and reduced her embrace to a clasp of the hand + she left with him. "Now tell me," he said, "what is it makes + you unhappy?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I don't know," she answered, drying her averted eyes. "I + suppose I am overwrought from not sleeping, and from thinking + how we should arrange it all." + </p> + <p> + "And now that it's all arranged, can't you be cheerful + again?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes." + </p> + <p> + "You're satisfied with the way we've arranged it? Because + if—" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, perfectly—perfectly!" She hastily interrupted. "I + wouldn't have it otherwise. Of course," she added, "it wasn't + very pleasant having some one else suggest what I ought to + have thought of myself, and seem more delicate about you than + I was." + </p> + <p> + "Some one else?" + </p> + <p> + "You know! Mrs. Bowen." + </p> + <p> + "Oh! But I couldn't see that she was anxious to spare me. It + occurred to me that she was concerned about your family." + </p> + <p> + "It led up to the other! it's all the same thing." + </p> + <p> + "Well, even in that case, I don't see why you should mind it. + It was certainly very friendly of her, and I know that she + has your interest at heart entirely." + </p> + <p> + "Yes; she knows how to make it seem so." + </p> + <p> + don't understand this. Don't you think Mrs. Bowen likes you?" + </p> + <p> + "She detests me." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, no, no, no! That's too cruel an error. You mustn't think + that. I can't let you. It's morbid. I'm sure that she's + devotedly kind and good to you." + </p> + <p> + "Being kind and good isn't liking. I know what she thinks. + But of course I can't expect to convince you of it; no one + else could see it." + </p> + <p> + "No!" said Colville, with generous fervour. + </p> + <p> + "Because it doesn't exist and you mustn't imagine it. You are + as sincerely and unselfishly regarded in this house as you + could be in your own home. I'm sure of that. I know Mrs. + Bowen. She has her little worldlinesses and unrealities of + manner, but she is truth and loyalty itself. She would rather + die than be false, or even unfair. I knew her long + ago—" + </p> + <p> + "Yes," cried the girl, "long before you knew me!" + </p> + <p> + "And I know her to be the soul of honour," said Colville, + ignoring the childish outburst. "Honour—like a man's," + he added. "And, Imogene, I want you to promise me that you'll + not think of her any more in that way. I want you to think of + her as faithful and loving to you, for she is so. Will you do + it?" + </p> + <p> + Imogene did not answer him at once. Then she turned upon him + a face of radiant self-abnegation. "I will do anything you + tell me. Only tell me things to do." + </p> + <p> + The next time he came he again saw Mrs. Bowen alone before + Imogene appeared. The conversation was confined to two + sentences. + </p> + <p> + "Mr. Colville," she said, with perfectly tranquil point, + while she tilted a shut book to and fro on her knee, "I will + thank you not to defend me." + </p> + <p> + Had she overheard? Had Imogene told her? He answered, in a + fury of resentment for her ingratitude that stupefied him. "I + will never speak of you again." + </p> + <p> + Now they were enemies; he did not know how or why, but he + said to himself, in the bitterness of his heart, that it was + better so; and when Imogene appeared, and Mrs. Bowen + vanished, as she did without another word to him, he folded + the girl in a vindictive embrace. + </p> + <p> + "What is the matter?" she asked, pushing away from him. + </p> + <p> + "With me?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes; you seem so excited." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, nothing," he said, shrinking from the sharpness of that + scrutiny in a woman's eyes, which, when it begins the perusal + of a man's soul, astonishes and intimidates him; he never + perhaps becomes able to endure it with perfect self-control. + "I suppose a slight degree of excitement in meeting you may + be forgiven me." He smiled under the unrelaxed severity of + her gaze. + </p> + <p> + "Was Mrs. Bowen saying anything about me?" + </p> + <p> + "Not a word," said Colville, glad of getting back to the firm + truth again, even if it were mere literality. + </p> + <p> + "We have made it up," she said, her scrutiny changing to a + lovely appeal for his approval. "What there was to make up." + </p> + <p> + "Yes?" + </p> + <p> + "I told her what you had said. And now it's all right between + us, and you mustn't be troubled at that any more. I did it to + please you." + </p> + <p> + She seemed to ask him with the last words whether she really + had pleased him, as if something in his aspect suggested a + doubt; and he hastened to reassure her. "That was very good + of you. I appreciate it highly. It's extremely gratifying." + </p> + <p> + She broke into a laugh of fond derision. "I don't believe you + really cared about it, or else you're not thinking about it + now. Sit down here; I want to tell you of something I've + thought out." She pulled him to the sofa, and put his arm + about her waist, with a simple fearlessness and + matter-of-course promptness that made him shudder. He felt + that he ought to tell her not to do it, but he did not quite + know how without wounding her. She took hold of his hand and + drew his lax arm taut. Then she looked up into his eyes, as + if some sense of his misgiving had conveyed itself to her, + but she did not release her hold of his hand. + </p> + <p> + "Perhaps we oughtn't, if we're not engaged?" she suggested, + with such utter trust in him as made his heart quake. + </p> + <p> + "Oh," he sighed, from a complexity of feeling that no + explanation could wholly declare, "we're engaged enough for + that, I suppose." + </p> + <p> + "I'm glad you think so," she answered innocently. "I knew you + wouldn't let me if it were not right." Having settled the + question, "Of course," she continued, "we shall all do our + best to keep our secret; but in spite of everything it may + get out. Do you see?" + </p> + <p> + "Well?" + </p> + <p> + "Well, of course it will make a great deal of remark." + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes; you must be prepared for that, Imogene," said + Colville, with as much gravity as he could make comport with + his actual position. + </p> + <p> + "I am prepared for it, and prepared to despise it," answered + the girl. "I shall have no trouble except the fear that you + will mind it." She pressed his hand as if she expected him to + say something to this. + </p> + <p> + "I shall never care for it," he said, and this was true + enough. "My only care will be to keep you from regretting. I + have tried from the first to make you see that I was very + much older than you. It would be miserable enough if you came + to see it too late." + </p> + <p> + "I have never seen it, and I never shall see it, because + there's no such difference between us. It isn't the years + that make us young or old—who is it says that? No + matter, it's true. And I want you to believe it. I want you + to feel that I am your youth—the youth you were robbed + of—given back to you. Will you do it? Oh, if you could, + I should be the happiest girl in the world." Tears of fervour + dimmed the beautiful eyes which looked into his. "Don't + speak!" she hurried on. "I won't let you till I have said it + all. It's been this idea, this hope, with me + always—ever since I knew what happened to you here long + ago—that you might go back in my life and take up yours + where it was broken off; that I might make your life what it + would have been—complete your destiny—" + </p> + <p> + Colville wrenched himself loose from the hold that had been + growing more tenderly close and clinging. "And do you think I + could be such a vampire as to let you? Yes, yes; I have had + my dreams of such a thing; but I see now how hideous they + were. You shall make no such sacrifice to me. You must put + away the fancies that could never be fulfilled, or if by some + infernal magic they could, would only bring sorrow to you and + shame to me. God forbid! And God forgive me, if I have done + or said anything to put this in your head! And thank God it + isn't too late yet for you to take yourself back." + </p> + <p> + "Oh," she murmured. "Do you think it is self-sacrifice for me + to give myself to you? It's self-glorification! You don't + understand—I haven't told you what I mean, or else I've + told it in such a way that I've made it hateful to you. Do + you think I don't care for you except to be something to you? + I'm not so generous as that. You are all the world to me. If + I take myself back from you, as you say, what shall I do with + myself?" + </p> + <p> + "Has it come to that?" asked Colville. He sat down again with + her, and this time he put his arm around her and drew her to + him, but it seemed to him he did it as if she were his child. + "I was going to tell you just now that each of us lived to + himself in this world, and that no one could hope to enter + into the life of another and complete it. But now I see that + I was partly wrong. We two are bound together, Imogene, and + whether we become all in all or nothing to each other, we can + have no separate fate." + </p> + <p> + The girl's eyes kindled with rapture. "Then let us never + speak of it again. I was going to say something, but now I + won't say it." + </p> + <p> + "Yes, say it." + </p> + <p> + "No; it will make you think that I am anxious on my own + account about appearances before people." + </p> + <p> + "You poor child, I shall never think you are anxious on your + own account about anything. What were you going to say?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, nothing! It was only—are you invited to the + Phillipses' fancy ball?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said Colville, silently making what he could of the + diversion, "I believe so." + </p> + <p> + "And are you going—did you mean to go?" she asked + timidly. + </p> + <p> + "Good heavens, no! What in the world should I do at another + fancy ball? I walked about with the airy grace of a bull in a + china shop at the last one." + </p> + <p> + Imogene did not smile. She faintly sighed. "Well, then, I + won't go either." + </p> + <p> + "Did you intend to go?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh no!" + </p> + <p> + "Why, of course you did, and it's very right you should. Did + you want me to go?" + </p> + <p> + "It would bore you." + </p> + <p> + "Not if you're there." She gave his hand a grateful pressure. + "Come, I'll go, of course, Imogene. A fancy ball to please + you is a very different thing from a fancy ball in the + abstract." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, what nice things you say! Do you know, I always admired + your compliments? I think they're the most charming + compliments in the world." + </p> + <p> + "I don't think they're half so pretty as yours; but they're + more sincere." + </p> + <p> + "No, honestly. They flatter, and at the same time they make + fun of the flattery a little; they make a person feel that + you like them, even while you laugh at them." + </p> + <p> + "They appear to be rather an intricate kind of + compliment—sort of <i>salsa agradolce</i> + affair—tutti frutti style—species of moral + mayonnaise." + </p> + <p> + "No—be quiet! You know what I mean. What were we + talking about? Oh! I was going to say that the most + fascinating thing about you always was that ironical way of + yours." + </p> + <p> + "Have I an ironical way? You were going to tell me something + more about the fancy ball." + </p> + <p> + "I don't care for it. I would rather talk about you." + </p> + <p> + "And I prefer the ball. It's a fresher topic—to me." + </p> + <p> + "Very well, then. But this I will say. No matter how happy + you should be, I should always want you to keep that tone of + persiflage. You've no idea how perfectly intoxicating it is." + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes, I have. It seems to have turned the loveliest and + wisest head in the world." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, do you really think so? I would give anything if you + did." + </p> + <p> + "What?" + </p> + <p> + "Think I was pretty," she pleaded, with full eyes. "Do you?" + </p> + <p> + "No, but I think you are wise. Fifty per cent, of + truth—it's a large average in compliments. What are you + going to wear?" + </p> + <p> + "Wear? Oh! At the ball! Something Egyptian, I suppose. It's + to be an Egyptian ball. Didn't you understand that?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes. But I supposed you could go in any sort of dress." + </p> + <p> + "You can't. You must go in some Egyptian character." + </p> + <p> + "How would Moses do? In the bulrushes, you know. You could be + Pharaoh's daughter, and recognise me by my three hats. And + toward the end of the evening, when I became very much bored, + I could go round killing Egyptians." + </p> + <p> + "No, no. Be serious. Though I like you to joke, too. I shall + always want you to joke. Shall you, always?" + </p> + <p> + "There may be emergencies when I shall fail—like family + prayers, and grace before meat, and dangerous sickness." + </p> + <p> + "Why, of course. But I mean when we're together, and there's + no reason why you shouldn't?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, at such times I shall certainly joke." + </p> + <p> + "And before people, too! I won't have them saying that it's + sobered you—that you used to be very gay, and now + you're cross, and never say anything." + </p> + <p> + "I will try to keep it up sufficiently to meet the public + demand." + </p> + <p> + "And I shall want you to joke me, too. You must satirise me. + It does more to show me my faults than anything else, and it + will show other people how perfectly submissive I am, and how + I think everything you do is just right." + </p> + <p> + "If I were to beat you a little in company, don't you think + it would serve the same purpose?" + </p> + <p> + "No, no; be serious." + </p> + <p> + "About joking?" + </p> + <p> + "No, about me. I know that I'm very intense, and you must try + to correct that tendency in me." + </p> + <p> + "I will, with pleasure. Which of my tendencies are you going + to correct?" + </p> + <p> + "You have none." + </p> + <p> + "Well, then, neither have you. I'm not going to be outdone in + civilities." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, if people could only hear you talk in this light way, + and then know what <i>I</i> know!" + </p> + <p> + Colville broke out into a laugh at the deep sigh which + accompanied these words. As a whole, the thing was grotesque + and terrible to him, but after a habit of his, he was finding + a strange pleasure in its details. + </p> + <p> + "No, no," she pleaded. "Don't laugh. There are girls that + would give their eyes for it." + </p> + <p> + "As pretty eyes as yours?" + </p> + <p> + "Do you think they're nice?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes, if they were not so mysterious." + </p> + <p> + "Mysterious?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes, I feel that your eyes can't really be as honest as they + look. That was what puzzled me about them the first night I + saw you." + </p> + <p> + "No—did it, really?" + </p> + <p> + "I went home saying to myself that no girl could be so + sincere as that Miss Graham seemed." + </p> + <p> + "Did you say that?" + </p> + <p> + "Words to that effect." + </p> + <p> + "And what do you think now?" + </p> + <p> + "Ah, I don't know. You had better go as the Sphinx." + </p> + <p> + Imogene laughed in simple gaiety of heart. + </p> + <p> + "How far we've got from the ball!" she said, as if the remote + excursion were a triumph. "What shall we really go as?" + </p> + <p> + "Isis and Osiris." + </p> + <p> + "Weren't they gods of some kind?" + </p> + <p> + "Little one-horse deities—not very much." + </p> + <p> + "It won't do to go as gods of any kind. They're always + failures. People expect too much of them." + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said Colville. "That's human nature under all + circumstances. But why go to an Egyptian ball at all?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, we must go. If we both stayed away it would make talk at + once, and my object is to keep people in the dark till the + very last moment. Of course it's unfortunate your having told + Mrs. Amsden that you were going away, and then telling her + just after you came back with me that you were going to stay. + But it can't be helped now. And I don't really care for it. + But don't you see why I want you to go to all these things?" + </p> + <p> + "All these things?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes, everything you're invited to after this. It's not + merely for a blind as regards ourselves now, but if they see + that you're very fond of all sorts of gaieties, they will see + that you are—they will understand——" + </p> + <p> + There was no need for her to complete the sentence. Colville + rose. "Come, come, my dear child," he said, "why don't you + end all this at once? I don't blame you. Heaven knows I blame + no one but myself! I ought to have the strength to break away + from this mistake, but I haven't. I couldn't bear to see you + suffer from pain that I should give you even for your good. + But do it yourself, Imogene, and for pity's sake don't + forbear from any notion of sparing me. I have no wish except + for your happiness, and now I tell you clearly that no + appearance we can put on before the world will deceive the + world. At the end of all our trouble I shall still be + forty——" + </p> + <p> + She sprang to him and put her hand over his mouth. "I know + what you're going to say, and I won't let you say it, for + you've promised over and over again not to speak of that any + more. Oh, do you think I care for the world, or what it will + think or say?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes, very much." + </p> + <p> + "That shows how little you understand me. It's because I wish + to <i>defy</i> the world—" + </p> + <p> + "Imogene! Be as honest with yourself as you are with me." + </p> + <p> + "I <i>am</i> honest." + </p> + <p> + "Look me in the eyes, then." + </p> + <p> + She did so for an instant, and then hid her face on his + shoulder. + </p> + <p> + "You silly girl," he said. "What is it you really do wish?" + </p> + <p> + "I wish there was no one in the world but you and me." + </p> + <p> + "Ah, you'd find it very crowded at times," said Colville + sadly. "Well, well," he added, "I'll go to your fandangoes, + because you want me to go." + </p> + <p> + "That's all I wished you to say," she replied, lifting her + head, and looking him radiantly in the face. "I don't want + you to go at all! I only want you to promise that you'll come + here every night that you're invited out, and read to Mrs. + Bowen and me." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I can't do that," said Colville; "I'm too fond of + society. For example, I've been invited to an Egyptian fancy + ball, and I couldn't think of giving that up." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, how delightful you are! They couldn't any of them talk + like you." + </p> + <p> + He had learned to follow the processes of her thought now. + "Perhaps they can when they come to my age." + </p> + <p> + "There!" she exclaimed, putting her hand on his mouth again, + to remind him of another broken promise. "Why can't you give + up the Egyptian ball?" + </p> + <p> + "Because I expect to meet a young lady there—a very + beautiful young lady." + </p> + <p> + "But how shall you know her if she's disguised?" + </p> + <p> + "Why, I shall be disguised too, you know." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, what delicious nonsense you <i>do</i> talk! Sit down + here and tell me what you are going to wear." + </p> + <p> + She tried to pull him back to the sofa. "What character shall + you go in?" + </p> + <p> + "No, no," he said, resisting the gentle traction. "I can't; I + have urgent business down-town." + </p> + <p> + "Oh! Business in <i>Florence!"</i> + </p> + <p> + "Well, if I stayed, I should tell you what disguise I'm going + to the ball in." + </p> + <p> + "I knew it was that. What do you think would be a good + character for me?" + </p> + <p> + "I don't know. The serpent of old Nile would be pretty good + for you." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I know you don't think it!" she cried fondly. She had + now let him take her hand, and he stood holding it at + arm's-length. Effie Bowen came into the room. "Good-bye," + said Imogene, with an instant assumption of society manner. + </p> + <p> + "Good-bye," said Colville, and went out. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, Mr. Colville!" she called, before he got to the outer + door. + </p> + <p> + "Yes," he said, starting back. + </p> + <p> + She met him midway of the dim corridor. "Only to—" She + put her arms about his neck and sweetly kissed him. + </p> + <p> + Colville went out into the sunlight feeling like some + strange, newly invented kind of scoundrel—a rascal of + such recent origin and introduction that he had not yet had + time to classify himself and ascertain the exact degree of + his turpitude. The task employed his thoughts all that day, + and kept him vibrating between an instinctive conviction of + monstrous wickedness and a logical and well-reasoned + perception that he had all the facts and materials for a + perfectly good conscience. He was the betrothed lover of this + poor child, whose affection he could not check without a + degree of brutality for which only a better man would have + the courage. When he thought of perhaps refusing her + caresses, he imagined the shock it would give her, and the + look of grief and mystification that would come into her + eyes, and he found himself incapable of that cruel rectitude. + He knew that these were the impulses of a white and loving + soul; but at the end of all his argument they remained a + terror to him, so that he lacked nothing but the will to fly + from Florence and shun her altogether till she had heard from + her family. This, he recalled, with bitter self-reproach was + what had been his first inspiration; he had spoken of it to + Mrs. Bowen, and it had still everything in its favour except + that it was impossible. + </p> + <p> + Imogene returned to the salotto, where the little girl was + standing with her face to the window, drearily looking out; + her back expressed an inner desolation which revealed itself + in her eyes when Imogene caught her head between her hands, + and tilted up her face to kiss it. + </p> + <p> + "What is the matter, Effie?" she demanded gaily. + </p> + <p> + "Nothing." + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes, there is." + </p> + <p> + "Nothing that you will care for. As long as he's pleasant to + you, you don't care what he does to me." + </p> + <p> + "What has he done to you?" + </p> + <p> + "He didn't take the slightest notice of me when I came into + the room. He didn't speak to me, or even look at me." + </p> + <p> + Imogene caught the little grieving, quivering face to her + breast "He is a wicked, wicked wretch! And I will give him + the awfulest scolding he ever had when he comes here again. I + will teach him to neglect my pet. I will let him understand + that if he doesn't notice you, he needn't notice me. I will + tell you, Effie—I've just thought of a way. The next + time he comes we will both receive him. We will sit up very + stiffly on the sofa together, and just answer Yes, No, Yes, + No, to everything he says, till he begins to take the hint, + and learns how to behave himself. Will you?" + </p> + <p> + A smile glittered through the little girl's tears; but she + asked, "Do you think it would be very polite?" + </p> + <p> + "No matter, polite or not, it's what he deserves. Of course, + as soon as he begins to take the hint, we will be just as we + always are." + </p> + <p> + Imogene despatched a note, which Colville got the next + morning, to tell him of his crime, and apprise him of his + punishment, and of the sweet compunction that had pleaded for + him in the breast of the child. If he did not think he could + help play the comedy through, he must come prepared to offer + Effie some sort of atonement. + </p> + <p> + It was easy to do this: to come with his pockets full of + presents, and take the little girl on his lap, and pour out + all his troubled heart in the caresses and tendernesses which + would bring him no remorse. He humbled himself to her + thoroughly, and with a strange sincerity in the harmless + duplicity, and promised, if she would take him back into + favour, that he would never offend again. Mrs. Bowen had sent + word that she was not well enough to see him; she had another + of her headaches; and he sent back a sympathetic and + respectful message by Effie, who stood thoughtfully at her + mother's pillow after she had delivered it, fingering the + bouquet Colville had brought her, and putting her head first + on this side, and then on that to admire it. + </p> + <p> + "I think Mr. Colville and Imogene are much more affectionate + than they used to be," she said. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen started up on her elbow. "What do you mean, + Effie?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, they're both so good to me." + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said her mother, dropping back to her pillow. "Both?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes; he's the <i>most</i> affectionate." + </p> + <p> + The mother turned her face the other way. "Then he must be," + she murmured. + </p> + <p> + "What?" asked the child. + </p> + <p> + "Nothing. I didn't know I spoke." + </p> + <p> + The little girl stood a while still playing with her flowers. + "I think Mr. Colville is about the pleasantest gentleman that + comes here. Don't you, mamma?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes." + </p> + <p> + "He's so interesting, and says such nice things. I don't know + whether children ought to think of such things, but I wish I + was going to marry some one like Mr. Colville. Of course I + should want to be tolerably old if I did. How old do you + think a person ought to be to marry him?" + </p> + <p> + "You mustn't talk of such things, Effie," said her mother. + </p> + <p> + "No; I suppose it isn't very nice." She picked out a bud in + her bouquet, and kissed it; then she held the nosegay at + arm's-length before her, and danced away with it. + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p><a name="XVII"><!--Marker--></a> + <h2> + XVII + </h2><br> + <br> + + <p> + In the ensuing fortnight a great many gaieties besides the + Egyptian ball took place, and Colville went wherever he and + Imogene were both invited. He declined the quiet dinners + which he liked, and which his hearty appetite and his habit + of talk fitted him to enjoy, and accepted invitations to all + sorts of evenings and At Homes, where dancing occupied a + modest corner of the card, and usurped the chief place in the + pleasures. At these places it was mainly his business to see + Imogene danced with by others, but sometimes he waltzed with + her himself, and then he was complimented by people of his + own age, who had left off dancing, upon his vigour. They said + they could not stand that sort of thing, though they + supposed, if you kept yourself in practice, it did not come + so hard. One of his hostesses, who had made a party for her + daughters, told him that he was an example to everybody, and + that if middle-aged people at home mingled more in the + amusements of the young, American society would not be the + silly, insipid, boy-and-girl affair that it was now. He went + to these places in the character of a young man, but he was + not readily accepted or recognised in that character. They + gave him frumps to take out to supper, mothers and maiden + aunts, and if the mothers were youngish, they threw off on + him, and did not care for his talk. + </p> + <p> + At one of the parties Imogene seemed to become aware for the + first time that the lapels of his dress-coat were not faced + with silk. + </p> + <p> + "Why don't you have them so?" she asked. "All the + <i>other</i> young men have. And you ought to wear a + <i>boutonnière</i>." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I think a man looks rather silly in silk lapels at + my—" He arrested himself, and then continued: "I'll see + what the tailor can do for me. In the meantime, give me a bud + out of your bouquet." + </p> + <p> + "How sweet you are!" she sighed. "You do the least thing so + that it is ten times as good as if any one else did it." + </p> + <p> + The same evening, as he stood leaning against a doorway, + behind Imogene and a young fellow with whom she was beginning + a quadrille, he heard her taking him to task. + </p> + <p> + "Why do you say 'Sir' to Mr. Colville?" + </p> + <p> + "Well, I know the English laugh at us for doing it, and say + it's like servants; but I never feel quite right answering + just 'Yes' and 'No' to a man of his age." + </p> + <p> + This was one of the Inglehart boys, whom he met at nearly all + of these parties, and not all of whom were so respectful. + Some of them treated him upon an old-boy theory, joking him + as freely as if he were one of themselves, laughing his + antiquated notions of art to scorn, but condoning them + because he was good-natured, and because a man could not help + being of his own epoch anyway. They put a caricature of him + among the rest on the walls of their <i>trattoria</i>, where + he once dined with them. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen did not often see him when he went to call upon + Imogene, and she was not at more than two or three of the + parties. Mrs. Amsden came to chaperon the girl, and + apparently suffered an increase of unrequited curiosity in + regard to his relations to the Bowen household, and the + extraordinary development of his social activity. Colville + not only went to all those evening parties, but he was in + continual movement during the afternoon at receptions and at + "days," of which he began to think each lady had two or + three. Here he drank tea, cup after cup, in reckless + excitement, and at night when he came home from the dancing + parties, dropping with fatigue, he could not sleep till + toward morning. He woke at the usual breakfast-hour, and then + went about drowsing throughout the day till the tea began + again in the afternoon. He fell asleep whenever he sat down, + not only in the reading-room at Viesseux's, where he + disturbed the people over their newspapers by his + demonstrations of somnolence, but even at church, whither he + went one Sunday to please Imogene, and started awake during + the service with the impression that the clergyman had been + making a joke. Everybody but Imogene was smiling. At the + café he slept without scruple, selecting a corner seat + for the purpose, and proportioning his <i>buonamano</i> to + the indulgence of the <i>giovane</i>. He could not tell how + long he slept at these places, but sometimes it seemed to him + hours. + </p> + <p> + One day he went to see Imogene, and while Effie Bowen stood + prattling to him as he sat waiting for Imogene to come in, he + faded light-headedly away from himself on the sofa, as if he + had been in his corner at the café. Then he was aware + of some one saying "Sh!" and he saw Effie Bowen, with her + finger on her lip, turned toward Imogene, a figure of + beautiful despair in the doorway. He was all tucked up with + sofa pillows, and made very comfortable, by the child, no + doubt. She slipped out, seeing him awake, so as to leave him + and Imogene alone, as she had apparently been generally + instructed to do, and Imogene came forward. + </p> + <p> + "What is the matter, Theodore?" she asked patiently. She had + taken to calling him Theodore when they were alone. She owned + that she did not like the name, but she said it was right she + should call him by it, since it was his. She came and sat + down beside him, where he had raised himself to a sitting + posture, but she did not offer him any caress. + </p> + <p> + "Nothing," he answered. "But this climate is making me + insupportably drowsy; or else the spring weather." + </p> + <p> + "Oh no; it isn't that," she said, with a slight sigh. He had + left her in the middle of a german at three o'clock in the + morning, but she now looked as fresh and lambent as a star. + "It's the late hours. They're killing you." + </p> + <p> + Colville tried to deny it; his incoherencies dissolved + themselves in a yawn, which he did not succeed in passing for + a careless laugh. + </p> + <p> + "It won't do," she said, as if speaking to herself; "no, it + won't do." + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes, it will," Colville protested. "I don't mind being + up. I've been used to it all my life on the paper. It's just + some temporary thing. It'll come all right." + </p> + <p> + "Well, no matter," said Imogene. "It makes you ridiculous, + going to all those silly places, and I'd rather give it up." + </p> + <p> + The tears began to steal down her cheeks, and Colville + sighed. It seemed to him that somebody or other was always + crying. A man never quite gets used to the tearfulness of + women. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, don't mind it," he said. "If you wish me to go, I will + go! Or die in the attempt," he added, with a smile. + </p> + <p> + Imogene did not smile with him. "I don't wish you to go any + more. It was a mistake in the first place, and from this out + I will adapt myself to you." + </p> + <p> + "And give up all your pleasures? Do you think I would let you + do that? No, indeed! Neither in this nor in anything else. I + will not cut off your young life in any way, + Imogene—not shorten it or diminish it. If I thought I + should do that, or you would try to do it for me, I should + wish I had never seen you." + </p> + <p> + "It isn't that. I know how good you are, and that you would + do anything for me." + </p> + <p> + "Well, then, why don't you go to these fandangoes alone? I + can see that you have me on your mind all the time, when I'm + with you." + </p> + <p> + "Oughtn't I?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes, up to a certain point, but not up to the point of + spoiling your fun. I will drop in now and then, but I won't + try to come to all of them, after this; you'll get along + perfectly well with Mrs. Amsden, and I shall be safe from her + for a while. That old lady has marked me for her prey: I can + see it in her glittering eyeglass. I shall fall asleep some + evening between dances, and then she will get it all out of + me." + </p> + <p> + Imogene still refused to smile. "No; I shall give it up. I + don't think it's well, going so much without Mrs. Bowen. + People will begin to talk." + </p> + <p> + "Talk?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes; they will begin to say that I had better stay with her + a little more, if she isn't well." + </p> + <p> + "Why, isn't Mrs. Bowen well?" asked Colville, with + trepidation. + </p> + <p> + "No; she's miserable. Haven't you noticed?" + </p> + <p> + "She sees me so seldom now. I thought it was only her + headaches——" + </p> + <p> + "It's much more than that. She seems to be failing every way. + The doctor has told her she ought to get away from Florence." + Colville could not speak; Imogene went on. "She's always + delicate, you know. And I feel that all that's keeping her + here now is the news from home that I—we're waiting + for." + </p> + <p> + Colville got up. "This is ghastly! She mustn't do it!" + </p> + <p> + "How can you help her doing it? If she thinks anything is + right, she can't help doing it. Who could?" + </p> + <p> + Colville thought to himself that he could have said; but he + was silent. At the moment he was not equal to so much joke or + so much truth; and Imogene went on— + </p> + <p> + "She'd be all the more strenuous about it if it were + disagreeable, and rather than accept any relief from + <i>me</i> she would die." + </p> + <p> + "Is she—unkind to you?" faltered Colville. + </p> + <p> + "She is only <i>too</i> kind. You can feel that she's + determined to be so—that she's said she will have + nothing to reproach herself with, and she won't. You don't + suppose Mrs. Bowen would be unkind to any one she disliked?" + </p> + <p> + "Ah, I didn't know," sighed Colville. + </p> + <p> + "The more she disliked them, the better she would use them. + It's because our engagement is so distasteful to her that + she's determined to feel that she did nothing to oppose it." + </p> + <p> + "But how can you tell that it's distasteful, then?" + </p> + <p> + "She lets you feel it by—not saying anything about it." + </p> + <p> + "I can't see how—" + </p> + <p> + "She never speaks of you. I don't believe she ever mentions + your name. She asks me about the places where I've been, and + about the people—every one but you. It's very + uncomfortable." + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said Colville, "it's uncomfortable." + </p> + <p> + "And if I allude to letters from home, she merely presses her + lips together. It's perfectly wretched." + </p> + <p> + "I see. It's I whom she dislikes, and I would do anything to + please her. She must know that," mused Colville aloud. + "Imogene!" he exclaimed, with a sudden inspiration. "Why + shouldn't I go away?" + </p> + <p> + "Go away?" she palpitated. "What should I do?" + </p> + <p> + The colours faded from his brilliant proposal. "Oh, I only + meant till something was + settled—determined—concluded; till this terrible + suspense was over." He added hopelessly, "But nothing can be + done!" + </p> + <p> + "I proposed," said Imogene, "that we should all go away. I + suggested Via Reggio—the doctor said she ought to have + sea air—or Venice; but she wouldn't hear of it. No; we + must wait." + </p> + <p> + "Yes, we must wait," repeated Colville hollowly. "Then + nothing can be done?" + </p> + <p> + "Why, haven't you said it?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes—yes. I can't go away, and you can't. But + couldn't we do something—get up something?" + </p> + <p> + "I don't know what you mean." + </p> + <p> + "I mean, couldn't we—amuse her somehow? help her to + take her mind off herself?" + </p> + <p> + Imogene stared at him rather a long time. Then, as if she had + satisfied herself in her own mind, she shook her head. "She + wouldn't submit to it." + </p> + <p> + "No; she seems to take everything amiss that I do," said + Colville. + </p> + <p> + "She has no right to do that," cried Imogene. "I'm sure that + you're always considering her, and proposing to do things for + her. I won't let you humble yourself, as if you had wronged + her." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I don't call it humbling. I—I should only be too + happy if I could do <i>anything that was agreeable to + her."</i> + </p> + <p> + "Very well, I will tell her," said the girl haughtily. "Shall + you object to my joining you in your amusements, whatever + they are? I assure you I will be very unobtrusive." + </p> + <p> + "I don't understand all this," replied Colville. "Who has + proposed to exclude you? Why did you tell me anything about + Mrs. Bowen if you didn't want me to say or do something? I + supposed you did; but I'll withdraw the offensive + proposition, whatever it was." + </p> + <p> + "There was nothing offensive. But if you pity her so much, + why can't you pity me a little?" + </p> + <p> + "I didn't know anything was the matter with you. I thought + you were enjoying yourself——" + </p> + <p> + "Enjoying? Keeping you up at dances till you drop asleep + whenever you sit down? And then coming home and talking to a + person who won't mention your name! Do you call that + enjoying? I can't speak of you to any one; and no one speaks + to me——" + </p> + <p> + "If you like, I will talk to you on the subject," Colville + essayed, in dreary jest. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, don't joke about it! This perpetual joking, I believe + it's that that's wearing me out. When I come to you for a + little comfort in circumstances that drive me almost + distracted, you want to amuse Mrs. Bowen, and when I ask to + be allowed to share in the amusement, you laugh at me! If you + don't understand it all, I'm sure <i>I</i> don't." + </p> + <p> + "Imogene!" + </p> + <p> + "No! It's very strange. There's only one explanation. You + don't care for me." + </p> + <p> + "Not care for you!" cried Colville, thinking of his + sufferings in the past fortnight. + </p> + <p> + "And I would have made any—<i>any</i> sacrifice for + you. At least I wouldn't have made you show yourself a mean + and grudging person if you had come to me for a little + sympathy." + </p> + <p> + "O poor child!" he cried, and his heart ached with the sense + that she really was nothing but an unhappy child. "I do + sympathise with you, and I see how hard it is for you to + manage with Mrs. Bowen's dislike for me. But you mustn't + think of if. I dare say it will be different; I've no doubt + we can get her to look at me in some brighter light. + I—" He did not know what he should urge next; but he + goaded his invention, and was able to declare that if they + loved each other they needed not regard any one else. This + flight, when accomplished, did not strike him as very + original effect, and it was with a dull surprise that he saw + it sufficed for her. + </p> + <p> + "No; no one!" she exclaimed, accepting the platitude as if it + were now uttered for the first time. She dried her eyes and + smiled. "I will tell Mrs. Bowen how you feel and what you've + said, and I know she will appreciate your generosity." + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said Colville pensively; "there's nothing I won't + <i>propose</i> doing for people." + </p> + <p> + She suddenly clung to him, and would not let him go. "Oh, + what is the matter?" she moaned afresh. "I show out the worst + that is in me, and only the worst. Do you think I shall + always be so narrow-minded with you? I thought I loved you + enough to be magnanimous. <i>You</i> are. It seemed to me + that our lives together would be grand and large; and here I + am, grovelling in the lowest selfishness! I am worrying and + scolding you because you wish to please some one that has + been as good as my own mother to me. Do you call that noble?" + </p> + <p> + Colville did not venture any reply to a demand evidently + addressed to her own conscience. + </p> + <p> + But when she asked if he really thought he had better go + away, he said, "Oh no; that was a mistake." + </p> + <p> + "Because, if you do, you shall—to punish me." + </p> + <p> + "My dearest girl, why should I wish to punish you?" + </p> + <p> + "Because I've been low and mean. Now I want you to do + something for Mrs. don't want you to sympathise with me at + all. When I ask for your sympathy, it's a sign that I don't + deserve it." + </p> + <p> + "Is that so?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, be serious with me. I mean it. And I want to beg your + pardon for something." + </p> + <p> + "Yes; what's that?" + </p> + <p> + "Can't you guess?" + </p> + <p> + "No." + </p> + <p> + "You needn't have" your lapels silk-lined. You needn't wear + <i>boutonnières</i>." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, but I've had the coat changed." + </p> + <p> + "No matter! Change it back! It isn't for me to make you over. + I must make myself over. It's my right, it's my sacred + privilege to conform to you in every way, and I humble myself + in the dust for having forgotten it at the very start. Oh, + <i>do</i> you think I can ever be worthy of you? I + <i>will</i> try; indeed I will! I shall not wear my light + dresses another time! From this out, I shall dress more in + keeping with you. I boasted that I should live to comfort and + console you, to recompense you for the past, and what have I + been doing? Wearying and degrading you!" + </p> + <p> + "Oh no," pleaded Colville. "I am very comfortable. I don't + need any compensation for the past. I need—sleep. I'm + going to bed tonight at eight o'clock, and I am going to + sleep twenty-four hours. Then I shall be fresh for Mrs. + Fleming's ball." + </p> + <p> + "I'm not going," said Imogene briefly. + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes, you are. I'll come round to-morrow evening and see." + </p> + <p> + "No. There are to be no more parties." + </p> + <p> + "Why?" + </p> + <p> + "I can't endure them." + </p> + <p> + She was looking at him and talking at him, but she seemed far + aloof in the abstraction of a sublime regret; she seemed + puzzled, bewildered at herself. + </p> + <p> + Colville got away. He felt the pathos of the confusion and + question to which he left her, but he felt himself powerless + against it. There was but one solution to it all, and that + was impossible. He could only grieve over her trouble, and + wait; grieve for the irrevocable loss which made her trouble + remote and impersonal to him, and submit. + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p><a name="XVIII"><!--Marker--></a> + <h2> + XVIII + </h2><br> + <br> + + <p> + The young clergyman whom Colville saw talking to Imogene on + his first evening at Mrs. Bowen's had come back from Rome, + where he had been spending a month or two, and they began to + meet at Palazzo Pinti again. If they got on well enough + together, they did not get on very far. The suave + house-priest manners of the young clergyman offended + Colville; he could hardly keep from sneering at his taste in + art and books, which in fact was rather conventional; and no + doubt Mr. Morton had his own reserves, under which he was + perfectly civil, and only too deferential to Colville, as to + an older man. Since his return, Mrs. Bowen had come back to + her <i>salon</i>. She looked haggard; but she did what she + could to look otherwise. She was always polite to Colville, + and she was politely cordial with the clergyman. Sometimes + Colville saw her driving out with him and Effie; they + appeared to make excursions, and he had an impression, very + obscure, that Mrs. Bowen lent the young clergyman money; that + he was a superstition of hers, and she a patron of his; he + must have been ten years younger than she; not more than + twenty-five. + </p> + <p> + The first Sunday after his return, Colville walked home with + Mr. Waters from hearing a sermon of Mr. Morton's, which they + agreed was rather well judged, and simply and fitly + expressed. + </p> + <p> + "And he spoke with the authority of the priest," said the old + minister. "His Church alone of all the Protestant Churches + has preserved that to its ministers. Sometimes I have thought + it was a great thing." + </p> + <p> + "Not always?" asked Colville, with a smile. + </p> + <p> + "These things are matters of mood rather than conviction with + me," returned Mr. Waters. "Once they affected me very deeply; + but now I shall so soon know all about it that they don't + move me. But at times I think that if I were to live my life + over again, I would prefer to be of some formal, some + inflexibly ritualised, religion. At + solemnities—-weddings and funerals—I have been + impressed with the advantage of the Anglican rite: it is the + Church speaking to and for humanity—or seems so," he + added, with cheerful indifference. "Something in its favour," + he continued, after a while, "is the influence that every + ritualised faith has with women. If they apprehend those + mysteries more subtly than we, such a preference of theirs + must mean a good deal. Yes; the other Protestant systems are + men's systems. Women must have form. They don't care for + freedom." + </p> + <p> + "They appear to like the formalist too, as well as the form," + said Colville, with scorn not obviously necessary. + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes; they must have everything in the concrete," said the + old gentleman cheerfully. + </p> + <p> + "I wonder where Mr. Morton met Mrs. Bowen first," said + Colville. + </p> + <p> + "Here, I think. I believe he had letters to her. Before you + came I used often to meet him at her house. I think she has + helped him with money at times." + </p> + <p> + "Isn't that rather an unpleasant idea?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes; it's disagreeable. And it places the ministry in a + dependent attitude. But under our system it's unavoidable. + Young men devoting themselves to the ministry frequently + receive gifts of money." + </p> + <p> + "I don't like it," cried Colville. + </p> + <p> + "They don't feel it as others would. I didn't myself. Even at + present I may be said to be living on charity. But sometimes + I have fancied that in Mr. Morton's case there might be + peculiarly mitigating circumstances." + </p> + <p> + "What do you mean?" + </p> + <p> + "When I met him first at Mrs. Bowen's I used to think that it + was Miss Graham in whom he was interested——" + </p> + <p> + "I can assure you," interrupted Colville, "that she was never + interested in him." + </p> + <p> + "Oh no; I didn't suppose that," returned the old man + tranquilly. "And I've since had reason to revise my opinion. + I think he is interested in Mrs. Bowen." + </p> + <p> + "Mrs. Bowen! And you think that would be a mitigating + circumstance in his acceptance of money from her? If he had + the spirit of a man at all, it would make it all the more + revolting." + </p> + <p> + "Oh no, oh no," softly pleaded Mr. Waters. "We must not look + at these things too romantically. He probably reasons that + she would give him all her money if they were married." + </p> + <p> + "But he has no right to reason in that way," retorted + Colville, with heat. "They are not married; it's ignoble and + unmanly for him to count upon it. It's preposterous. She must + be ten years older than he." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I don't say that they're to be married," Mr. Waters + replied. "But these disparities of age frequently occur in + marriage. I don't like them, though sometimes I think the + evil is less when it is the wife who is the elder. We look at + youth and age in a gross, material way too often. Women + remain young longer than men. They keep their youthful + sympathies; an old woman understands a young girl. Do + you—or do I—understand a young man?" + </p> + <p> + Colville laughed harshly. "It isn't <i>quite</i> the same + thing, Mr. Waters. But yes; I'll admit, for the sake of + argument, that I don't understand young men. I'll go further, + and say that I don't like them; I'm afraid of them. And you + wouldn't think," he added abruptly, "that it would be well + for me to marry a girl twenty years younger than myself." + </p> + <p> + The old man glanced up at him with innocent slyness. "I + prefer always to discuss these things in an impersonal way." + </p> + <p> + "But you can't discuss them impersonally with me; I'm engaged + to Miss Graham. Ever since you first found me here after I + told you I was going away I have wished to tell you this, and + this seems as good a time as any—or as bad." The + defiance faded from his voice, which dropped to a note of + weary sadness. "Yes, we're engaged—or shall be, as soon + as she can hear from her family. I wanted to tell you because + it seemed somehow your due, and because I fancied you had a + friendly interest in us both." + </p> + <p> + "Yes, that is true," returned Mr. Waters. "I wish you joy." + He went through the form of offering his hand to Colville, + who pressed it with anxious fervour. + </p> + <p> + "I confess," he said, "that I feel the risks of the affair. + It's not that I have any dread for my own part; I have lived + my life, such as it is. But the child is full of fancies + about me that can't be fulfilled. She dreams of restoring my + youth somehow, of retrieving the past for me, of avenging me + at her own cost for an unlucky love affair that I had here + twenty years ago. It's pretty of her, but it's terribly + pathetic—it's tragic. I know very well that I'm a + middle-aged man, and that there's no more youth for me. I'm + getting grey, and I'm getting fat; I wouldn't be young if I + could; it's a bore. I suppose I could keep up an illusion of + youthfulness for five or six years more; and then if I could + be quietly chloroformed out of the way, perhaps it wouldn't + have been so very bad." + </p> + <p> + "I have always thought," said Mr. Waters dreamily, "that a + good deal might be said for abbreviating hopeless suffering. + I have known some very good people advocate its practice by + science." + </p> + <p> + "Yes," answered Colville. "Perhaps I've presented that point + too prominently. What I wished you to understand was that I + don't care for myself; that I consider only the happiness of + this young girl that's somehow—I hardly know + how—been put in my keeping. I haven't forgotten the + talks that we've had heretofore on this subject, and it would + be affectation and bad taste in me to ignore them. Don't be + troubled at anything you've said; it was probably true, and + I'm sure it was sincere. Sometimes I think that the + kindest—the least cruel—thing I could do would be + to break with her, to leave her. But I know that I shall do + nothing of the kind; I shall drift. The child is very dear to + me. She has great and noble qualities; she's supremely + unselfish; she loves me through her mistaken pity, and + because she thinks she can sacrifice herself to me. But she + can't. Everything is against that; she doesn't know how, and + there is no reason why. I don't express it very well. I think + nobody clearly understands it but Mrs. Bowen, and I've + somehow alienated her." + </p> + <p> + He became aware that his self-abnegation was taking the + character of self-pity, and he stopped. + </p> + <p> + Mr. Waters seemed to be giving the subject serious attention + in the silence that ensued. "There is this to be remembered," + he began, "which we don't consider in our mere speculations + upon any phase of human affairs; and that is the wonderful + degree of amelioration that any given difficulty finds in the + realisation. It is the anticipation, not the experience, that + is the trial. In a case of this kind, facts of temperament, + of mere association, of union, work unexpected mitigations; + they not only alleviate, they allay. You say that she + cherishes an illusion concerning you: well, with women, + nothing is so indestructible as an illusion. Give them any + chance at all, and all the forces of their nature combine to + preserve it. And if, as you say, she is so dear to you, that + in itself is almost sufficient. I can well understand your + misgivings, springing as they do from a sensitive conscience; + but we may reasonably hope that they are exaggerated. Very + probably there will not be the rapture for her that there + would be if—if you were younger; but the chances of + final happiness are great—yes, very considerable. She + will learn to appreciate what is really best in you, and you + already understand her. Your love for her is the key to the + future. Without that, of course——" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, of course," interrupted Colville hastily. Every touch of + this comforter's hand had been a sting; and he parted with + him in that feeling of utter friendlessness involving a man + who has taken counsel upon the confession of half his + trouble. + </p> + <p> + Something in Mrs. Bowen's manner when he met her next made + him think that perhaps Imogene had been telling her of the + sympathy he had expressed for her ill-health. It was in the + evening, and Imogene and Mr. Morton were looking over a copy + of <i>The Marble Faun</i>, which he had illustrated with + photographs at Rome. Imogene asked Colville to look at it + too, but he said he would examine it later; he had his + opinion of people who illustrated <i>The Marble Faun</i> with + photographs; it surprised him that she seemed to find + something novel and brilliant in the idea. + </p> + <p> + Effie Bowen looked round where she was kneeling on a chair + beside the couple with the book, and seeing Colville + wandering neglectedly about before he placed himself, she + jumped down and ran and caught his hand. + </p> + <p> + "Well, what now?" he asked, with a dim smile, as she began to + pull him toward the sofa. When he should be expelled from + Palazzo Pinti he would really miss the worship of that little + thing. He knew that her impulse had been to console him for + his exclusion from the pleasures that Imogene and Mr. Morton + were enjoying. + </p> + <p> + "Nothing. Just talk," she said, making him fast in a corner + of the sofa by crouching tight against him. + </p> + <p> + "What about? About which is the pleasantest season?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh no; we've talked about that so often. Besides, of course + you'd say spring, now that it's coming on so nicely." + </p> + <p> + "Do you think I'm so changeable as that? Haven't I always + said winter when this question of the seasons was up? And I + say it now. Shan't you be awfully sorry when you can't have a + pleasant little fire on the hearth like this any more?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes; I know. But it's very nice having the flowers, too. The + grass was all full of daisies to-day—perfectly powdered + with them." + </p> + <p> + "To-day? Where?" + </p> + <p> + "At the Cascine. And in under the trees there were millions + of violets and crow's-feet. Mr. Morton helped me to get them + for mamma and Imogene. And we stayed so long that when we + drove home the daisies had all shut up, and the little pink + leaves outside made it look like a field of red clover. Are + you never going there any more?" + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen came in. From the fact that there was no greeting + between her and Mr. Morton, Colville inferred that she was + returning to the room after having already been there. She + stood a moment, with a little uncertainty, when she had + shaken hands with him, and then dropped upon the sofa beyond + Effie. The little girl ran one hand through Colville's arm, + and the other through her mother's, and gripped them fast. + "Now I have got you both," she triumphed, and smiled first + into her face, and then into his. + </p> + <p> + "Be quiet, Effie," said her mother, but she submitted. + </p> + <p> + "I hope you're better for your drive to-day, Mrs. Bowen. + Effie has been telling me about it." + </p> + <p> + "We stayed out a long time. Yes, I think the air did me good; + but I'm not an invalid, you know." + </p> + <p> + "Oh no." + </p> + <p> + "I'm feeling a little fagged. And the weather was tempting. I + suppose you've been taking one of your long walks." + </p> + <p> + "No, I've scarcely stirred out. I usually feel like going to + meet the spring a little more than half-way; but this year I + don't, somehow." + </p> + <p> + "A good many people are feeling rather languid, I believe," + said Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + "I hope you'll get away from Florence," said Colville. + </p> + <p> + "Oh," she returned, with a faint flush, "I'm afraid Imogene + exaggerated that a little." She added, "You are very good." + </p> + <p> + She was treating him more kindly than she had ever done since + that Sunday afternoon when he came in with Imogene to say + that he was going to stay. It might be merely because she had + worn out her mood of severity, as people do, returning in + good-humour to those with whom they were offended, merely + through the reconciling force of time. She did not look at + him, but this was better than meeting his eye with that + interceptive glance. A strange peace touched his heart. + Imogene and the young clergyman at the table across the room + were intent on the book still; he was explaining and + expatiating, and she listening. Colville saw that he had a + fine head, and an intelligent, handsome, gentle face. When he + turned again to Mrs. Bowen it was with the illusion that she + had been saying something; but she was, in fact, sitting + mute, and her face, with its bright colour, showed + pathetically thin. + </p> + <p> + "I should imagine that Venice would be good for you," he + said. + </p> + <p> + "It's still very harsh there, I hear. No; when we leave + Florence, I think we will go to Switzerland." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, not to Madame Schebres's," pleaded the child, turning + upon her. + </p> + <p> + "No, not to Madame Schebres," consented the mother. She + continued, addressing Colville: "I was thinking of Lausanne. + Do you know Lausanne at all?" + </p> + <p> + "Only from Gibbon's report. It's hardly up to date." + </p> + <p> + "I thought of taking a house there for the summer," said Mrs. + Bowen, playing with Effie's fingers. "It's pleasant by the + lake, I suppose." + </p> + <p> + "It's lovely by the lake!" cried the child. "Oh, do go, + mamma! I could get a boat and learn to row. Here you can't + row, the Arno's so swift." + </p> + <p> + "The air would bring you up," said Colville to Mrs. Bowen. + "Switzerland's the only country where you're perfectly sure + of waking new every morning." + </p> + <p> + This idea interested the child. "Waking new!" she repeated. + </p> + <p> + "Yes; perfectly made over. You wake up another person. + Shouldn't you think that would be nice?" + </p> + <p> + "No." + </p> + <p> + "Well, I shouldn't, in your place. But in mine, I much prefer + to wake up another person. Only it's pretty hard on the other + person." + </p> + <p> + "How queer you are!" The child set her teeth for fondness of + him, and seizing his cheeks between her hands, squeezed them + hard, admiring the effect upon his features, which in some + respects was not advantageous. + </p> + <p> + "Effie!" cried her mother sternly; and she dropped to her + place again, and laid hold of Colville's arm for protection. + "You are really very rude. I shall send you to bed." + </p> + <p> + "Oh no, don't, Mrs. Bowen," he begged. "I'm responsible for + these violences. Effie used to be a very well behaved child + before she began playing with me. It's all my fault." + </p> + <p> + They remained talking on the sofa together, while Imogene and + Mr. Morton continued to interest themselves in the book. From + time to time she looked over at them, and then turned again + to the young clergyman, who, when he had closed the book, + rested his hands on its top and began to give an animated + account of something, conjecturably his sojourn in Rome. + </p> + <p> + In a low voice, and with pauses adjusted to the occasional + silences of the young people across the room, Mrs. Bowen told + Colville how Mr. Morton was introduced to her by an old + friend who was greatly interested in him. She said, frankly, + that she had been able to be of use to him, and that he was + now going back to America very soon; it was as if she were + privy to the conjecture that had come to the surface in his + talk with Mr. Waters, and wished him to understand exactly + how matters stood with the young clergyman and herself. + Colville, indeed, began to be more tolerant of him; he + succeeded in praising the sermon he had heard him preach. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, he has talent," said Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + They fell into the old, almost domestic strain, from which + she broke at times with an effort, but returning as if + helplessly to it. He had the gift of knowing how not to take + an advantage with women; that sense of unconstraint in them + fought in his favour; when Effie dropped her head wearily + against his arm, her mother even laughed in sending her off + to bed; she had hitherto been serious. Imogene said she would + go to see her tucked in, and that sent the clergyman to say + good-night to Mrs. Bowen, and to put an end to Colville's + audience. + </p> + <p> + In these days, when Colville came every night to Palazzo + Pinti, he got back the tone he had lost in the past + fortnight. He thought that it was the complete immunity from + his late pleasures, and the regular and sufficient sleep, + which had set him firmly on his feet again, but he did not + inquire very closely. Imogene went two or three times, after + she had declared she would go no more, from the necessity + women feel of blunting the edge of comment; but Colville + profited instantly and fully by the release from the parties + which she offered him. He did not go even to afternoon + tea-drinkings; the "days" of the different ladies, which he + had been so diligent to observe, knew him no more. At the + hours when society assembled in this house or that and + inquired for him, or wondered about him, he was commonly + taking a nap, and he was punctually in bed every night at + eleven, after his return from Mrs. Bowen's. + </p> + <p> + He believed, of course, that he went there because he now no + longer met Imogene elsewhere, and he found the house + pleasanter than it had ever been since the veglione. Mrs. + Bowen's relenting was not continuous, however. There were + times that seemed to be times of question and of struggle + with her, when she vacillated between the old cordiality and + the later alienation; when she went beyond the former, or + lapsed into moods colder and more repellent than the latter. + It would have been difficult to mark the moment when these + struggles ceased altogether, and an evening passed in + unbroken kindness between them. But afterwards Colville could + remember an emotion of grateful surprise at a subtle word or + action of hers in which she appeared to throw all + restraint—scruple or rancour, whichever it might + be—to the winds, and become perfectly his friend again. + It must have been by compliance with some wish or assent to + some opinion of his; what he knew was that he was not only + permitted, he was invited, to feel himself the most favoured + guest. The charming smile, so small and sweet, so very near + to bitterness, came back to her lips, the deeply fringed + eyelids were lifted to let the sunny eyes stream upon him. + She did, now, whatever he asked her. She consulted his taste + and judgment on many points; she consented to resume, when + she should be a little stronger, their visits to the churches + and galleries: it would be a shame to go away from Florence + without knowing them thoroughly. It came to her asking him to + drive with her and Imogene in the Cascine; and when Imogene + made some excuse not to go, Mrs. Bowen did not postpone the + drive, but took Colville and Effie. + </p> + <p> + They drove quite down to the end of the Cascine, and got out + there to admire the gay monument, with the painted bust, of + the poor young Indian prince who died in Florence. They + strolled all about, talking of the old times in the Cascine, + twenty years before; and walking up the road beside the + canal, while the carriage slowly followed, they stopped to + enjoy the peasants lying asleep in the grass on the other + bank. Colville and Effie gathered wild-flowers, and piled + them in her mother's lap when she remounted to the carriage + and drove along while they made excursions into the little + dingles beside the road. Some people who overtook them in + these sylvan pleasures reported the fact at a reception to + which they were going, and Mrs. Amsden, whose mind had been + gradually clearing under the simultaneous withdrawal of + Imogene and Colville from society, professed herself again as + thickly clouded as a weather-glass before a storm. She + appealed to the sympathy of others against this hardship. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen took Colville home to dinner; Mr. Morton was + coming, she said, and he must come too. At table the young + clergyman made her his compliment on her look of health, and + she said, Yes; she had been driving, and she believed that + she needed nothing but to be in the air a little more, as she + very well could, now the spring weather was really coming. + She said that they had been talking all winter of going to + Fiesole, where Imogene had never been yet; and upon + comparison it appeared that none of them had yet been to + Fiesole except herself. Then they must all go together, she + said; the carriage would hold four very comfortably. + </p> + <p> + "Ah! that leaves me out," said Colville, who had caught sight + of Effie's fallen countenance. + </p> + <p> + "Oh no. How is that? It leaves Effie out." + </p> + <p> + "It's the same thing. But I might ride, and Effie might give + me her hand to hold over the side of the carriage; that would + sustain me." + </p> + <p> + "We could take her between us, Mrs. Bowen," suggested + Imogene. "The back seat is wide." + </p> + <p> + "Then the party is made up," said Colville, "and Effie hasn't + demeaned herself by asking to go where she wasn't invited." + </p> + <p> + The child turned inquiringly toward her mother, who met her + with an indulgent smile, which became a little flush of + grateful appreciation when it reached Colville; but Mrs. + Bowen ignored Imogene in the matter altogether. + </p> + <p> + The evening passed delightfully. Mr. Morton had another book + which he had brought to show Imogene, and Mrs. Bowen sat a + long time at the piano, striking this air and that of the + songs which she used to sing when she was a girl: Colville + was trying to recall them. When he and Imogene were left + alone for their adieux, they approached each other in an + estrangement through which each tried to break. + </p> + <p> + "Why don't you scold me?" she asked. "I have neglected you + the whole evening." + </p> + <p> + "How have you neglected me?" + </p> + <p> + "How? Ah! if you don't know——" + </p> + <p> + "No. I dare say I must be very stupid. I saw you talking with + Mr. Morton, and you seemed interested. I thought I'd better + not intrude." + </p> + <p> + She seemed uncertain of his intention, and then satisfied of + its simplicity. + </p> + <p> + "Isn't it pleasant to have Mrs. Bowen in the old mood again?" + he asked. + </p> + <p> + "Is she in the old mood?" + </p> + <p> + "Why, yes. Haven't you noticed how cordial she is? + </p> + <p> + "I thought she was rather colder than usual." + </p> + <p> + "Colder!" The chill of the idea penetrated even through the + density of Colville's selfish content. A very complex + emotion, which took itself for indignation, throbbed from his + heart. "Is she cold with you, Imogene?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, if you saw nothing——" + </p> + <p> + "No; and I think you must be mistaken. She never speaks of + you without praising you." + </p> + <p> + "Does she speak of me?" asked the girl, with her honest eyes + wide open upon him. + </p> + <p> + "Why, no," Colville acknowledged. "Come to reflect, it's I + who speak of you. But how—how is she cold with you?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I dare say it's a delusion of mine. Perhaps I'm cold + with her." + </p> + <p> + "Then don't be so, my dear! Be sure that she's your + friend—true and good. Good night." + </p> + <p> + He caught the girl in his arms, and kissed her tenderly. She + drew away, and stood a moment with her repellent fingers on + his breast. + </p> + <p> + "Is it all for me?" she asked. + </p> + <p> + "For the whole obliging and amiable world," he answered + gaily. + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p><a name="XIX"><!--Marker--></a> + <h2> + XIX + </h2><br> + <br> + + <p> + The next time Colville came he found himself alone with + Imogene, who asked him what he had been doing all day. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, living along till evening. What have you?" + </p> + <p> + She did not answer at once, nor praise his speech for the + devotion implied in it. After a while she said: "Do you + believe in courses of reading? Mr. Morton has taken up a + course of reading in Italian poetry. He intends to master + it." + </p> + <p> + "Does he?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes. Do you think something of the kind would be good for + me?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, if you thirst for conquest. But I should prefer to rest + on my laurels if I were you." + </p> + <p> + Imogene did not smile. "Mr. Morton thinks I should enjoy a + course of Kingsley. He says he's very earnest." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, immensely. But aren't you earnest enough already, my + dear?" + </p> + <p> + "Do you think I'm too earnest?" + </p> + <p> + "No; I should say you were just right." + </p> + <p> + "You know better than that. I wish you would criticise me + sometimes." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I'd rather not." + </p> + <p> + "Why? Don't you see anything to criticise in me? Are you + satisfied with me in every way? You ought to think. You ought + to think now. Do you think that I am doing right in all + respects? Am I all that I could be to you, and to you alone? + If I am wrong in the least thing, criticise me, and I will + try to be better." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, you might criticise back, and I shouldn't like that." + </p> + <p> + "Then you don't approve of a course of Kingsley?" asked the + girl. + </p> + <p> + "Does that follow? But if you're going in for earnestness, + why don't you take up a course of Carlyle?" + </p> + <p> + "Do you think that would be better than Kingsley?" + </p> + <p> + "Not a bit. But Carlyle's so earnest that he can't talk + straight." + </p> + <p> + "I can't make out what you mean. Wouldn't you like me to + improve?" + </p> + <p> + "Not much," laughed Colville. "If you did, I don't know what + I should do. I should have to begin to improve too, and I'm + very comfortable as I am." + </p> + <p> + "I should wish to do it to—to be more worthy of you," + grieved the girl, as if deeply disappointed at his frivolous + behaviour. + </p> + <p> + He could not help laughing, but he was sorry, and would have + taken her hand; she kept it from him, and removed to the + farthest corner of the sofa. Apparently, however, her ideal + did not admit of open pique, and she went on trying to talk + seriously with him. + </p> + <p> + "You think, don't you, that we oughtn't to let a day pass + without storing away some + thought—suggestion——" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, there's no hurry," he said lazily. "Life is rather a + long affair—if you live. There appears to be plenty of + time, though people say not, and I think it would be rather + odious to make every day of use. Let a few of them go by + without doing anything for you! And as for reading, why not + read when you're hungry, just as you eat? Shouldn't you hate + to take up a course of roast beef, or a course of turkey?" + </p> + <p> + "Very well, then," said Imogene. "I shall not begin + Kingsley." + </p> + <p> + "Yes, do it. I dare say Mr. Morton's quite right. He will + look at these things more from your own point of view. All + the Kingsley novels are in the Tauchnitz. By all means do + what he says." + </p> + <p> + "I will do what <i>you</i> say." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, but I say nothing." + </p> + <p> + "Then I will do nothing." + </p> + <p> + Colville laughed at this too, and soon after the clergyman + appeared. Imogene met him so coldly that Colville felt + obliged to make him some amends by a greater show of + cordiality than he felt. But he was glad of the effort, for + he began to like him as he talked to him; it was easy for him + to like people; the young man showed sense and judgment, and + if he was a little academic in his mind and manners, Colville + tolerantly reflected that some people seemed to be born so, + and that he was probably not artificial, as he had once + imagined from the ecclesiastical scrupulosity of his dress. + </p> + <p> + Imogene ebbed away to the piano in the corner of the room, + and struck some chords on it. At each stroke the young + clergyman, whose eyes had wandered a little toward her from + the first, seemed to vibrate in response. The conversation + became incoherent before Mrs. Bowen joined them. Then, by a + series of illogical processes, the clergyman was standing + beside Imogene at the piano, and Mrs. Bowen was sitting + beside Colville on the sofa. + </p> + <p> + "Isn't there to be any Effie, to-night?" he asked. + </p> + <p> + "No. She has been up too much of late. And I wished to speak + with you—about Imogene." + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said Colville, not very eagerly. At that moment he + could have chosen another topic. + </p> + <p> + "It is time that her mother should have got my letter. In + less than a fortnight we ought to have an answer." + </p> + <p> + "Well?" said Colville, with a strange constriction of the + heart. + </p> + <p> + "Her mother is a person of very strong character; her husband + is absorbed in business, and defers to her in everything." + </p> + <p> + "It isn't an uncommon American situation," said Colville, + relieving his tension by this excursion. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen ignored it. "I don't know how she may look at the + affair. She may give her assent at once, or she may decide + that nothing has taken place till—she sees you." + </p> + <p> + "I could hardly blame her for that," he answered + submissively. + </p> + <p> + "It isn't a question of that," said Mrs. Bowen. "It's a + question of—others. Mr. Morton was here before you + came, and I know he was interested in Imogene—I am + certain of it. He has come back, and he sees no reason why he + should not renew his attentions." + </p> + <p> + "No—o—o," faltered Colville. + </p> + <p> + "I wish you to realise the fact." + </p> + <p> + "But what would you——" + </p> + <p> + "I told you," said Mrs. Bowen, with a full return of that + severity whose recent absence Colville had found so + comfortable, "that I can't advise or suggest anything at + all." + </p> + <p> + He was long and miserably silent. At last, "Did you ever + think," he asked, "did you ever suppose—that is to say, + did you ever suspect that—she—that Imogene + was—at all interested in him?" + </p> + <p> + "I think she was—at one time," said Mrs. Bowen + promptly. + </p> + <p> + Colville sighed, with a wandering disposition to whistle. + </p> + <p> + "But that is nothing," she went on. "People have many passing + fancies. The question is, what are you going to do now? I + want to know, as Mr. Morton's friend." + </p> + <p> + "Ah, I wish you wanted to know as <i>my</i> friend, Mrs. + Bowen!" A sudden thought flashed upon him. "Why shouldn't I + go away from Florence till Imogene hears from her mother? + That seemed to me right in the first place. There is no tie + that binds her to me. I hold her to nothing. If she finds in + my absence that she likes this young man better—" An + expression of Mrs. Bowen's face stopped him. He perceived + that he had said something very shocking to her; he perceived + that the thing was shocking in itself, but it was not that + which he cared for. "I don't mean that I won't hold myself + true to her as long as she will. I recognise my + responsibility fully. I know that I am answerable for all + this, and that no one else is; and I am ready to bear any + penalty. But what I can't bear is that you should + misunderstand me, that you should—I have been so + wretched ever since you first began to blame me for my part + in this, and so happy this past fortnight that I + can't—I <i>won't</i>—go back to that state of + things. No; you have no right to relent toward me, and then + fling me off as you have tried to do to-night! I have some + feeling too—some rights. You shall receive me as a + friend, or not at all! How can I live if you——" + </p> + <p> + She had been making little efforts as if to rise; now she + forced herself to her feet, and ran from the room. + </p> + <p> + The young people looked up from their music; some wave of the + sensation had spread to them, but seeing Colville remain + seated, they went on with their playing till he rose. Then + Imogene called out, "Isn't Mrs. Bowen coming back?" + </p> + <p> + "I don't know; I think not," answered Colville stupidly, + standing where he had risen. + </p> + <p> + She hastened questioning toward him. "What is the matter? + Isn't she well?" + </p> + <p> + Mr. Morton's face expressed a polite share in her anxiety. + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes; quite, I believe," Colville replied. + </p> + <p> + "She heard Effie call, I suppose," suggested the girl. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, yes; I think so; that is—yes. I must be going. + Good night." + </p> + <p> + He took her hand and went away, leaving the clergyman still + there; but he lingered only for a report from Mrs. Bowen, + which Imogene hurried to get. She sent word that she would + join them presently. But Mr. Morion said that it was late + already, and he would beg Miss Graham to say good-night for + him. When Mrs. Bowen returned Imogene was alone. + </p> + <p> + She did not seem surprised or concerned at that. "Imogene, I + have been talking to Mr. Colville about you and Mr. Morton." + </p> + <p> + The girl started and turned pale. + </p> + <p> + "It is almost time to hear from your mother, and she may + consent to your engagement. Then you must be prepared to + act." + </p> + <p> + "Act?" + </p> + <p> + "To make it known. Matters can't go on as they have been + going. I told Mr. Colville that Mr. Morton ought to know at + once." + </p> + <p> + "Why ought he to know?" asked Imogene, doubtless with that + impulse to temporise which is natural to the human soul in + questions of right and interest. She sank into the chair + beside which she had been standing. + </p> + <p> + "If your mother consents, you will feel bound to Mr. + Colville?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said the girl. + </p> + <p> + "And if she refuses?" + </p> + <p> + "He has my word. I will keep my word to him," replied Imogene + huskily. "Nothing shall make me break it." + </p> + <p> + "Very well, then!" exclaimed Mrs. Bowen. "We need not wait + for your mother's answer. Mr. Morton ought to know, and he + ought to know at once. do. He is in love with you." + </p> + <p> + "Oh," moaned the girl. + </p> + <p> + "Yes; you can't deny it. And it's cruel, it's treacherous, to + let him go on thinking that you are free." + </p> + <p> + "I will never see him again." + </p> + <p> + "Ah! that isn't enough. He has a claim to know why. I will + not let him be treated so." + </p> + <p> + They were both silent. Then, "What did Mr. Colville say?" + asked Imogene. + </p> + <p> + "He? I don't know that he said anything. He——" + Mrs. Bowen stopped. + </p> + <p> + Imogene rose from her chair. + </p> + <p> + "I will not let him tell Mr. Morton. It would be too + indelicate." + </p> + <p> + "And shall you let it go on so?" + </p> + <p> + "No. I will tell him myself." + </p> + <p> + "How will you tell him?" + </p> + <p> + "I will tell him if he speaks to me." + </p> + <p> + "You will let it come to that?" + </p> + <p> + "There is no other way. I shall suffer more than he." + </p> + <p> + "But you will deserve to suffer, and your suffering will not + help him." + </p> + <p> + Imogene trembled into her chair again. + </p> + <p> + "I see," said Mrs. Bowen bitterly, "how it will be at last. + It will be as it has been from the first." She began to walk + up and down the room, mechanically putting the chairs in + place, and removing the disorder in which the occupancy of + several people leaves a room at the end of an evening. She + closed the piano, which Imogene had forgot to shut, with a + clash that jarred the strings from their silence. "But I will + do it, and I wonder——" + </p> + <p> + "You will speak to him?" faltered the girl. + </p> + <p> + "Yes!" returned Mrs. Bowen vehemently, and arresting herself + in her rapid movements. "It won't do for you to tell him, and + you won't let Mr. Colville." + </p> + <p> + "No, I can't," said Imogene, slowly shaking her head. "But I + will discourage him; I will not see him anymore." Mrs. Bowen + silently confronted her. "I will not see any one now till I + have heard from home." + </p> + <p> + "And how will that help? He must have some explanation, and I + will have to make it. What shall it be?" + </p> + <p> + Imogene did not answer. She said: "I will not have any one + know what is between me and Mr. Colville till I have heard + from home. If they try to refuse, then it will be for him to + take me against their will. But if he doesn't choose to do + that, then he shall be free, and I won't have him humiliated + a second time before the world. <i>This</i> time <i>he</i> + shall be the one to reject. And I don't care who suffers. The + more I prize the person, the gladder I shall be; and if I + could suffer before everybody I would. If people ever find it + out, I will tell them that it was he who broke it off." She + rose again from her chair, and stood flushed and thrilling + with the notion of her self-sacrifice. Out of the tortuous + complexity of the situation she had evolved this brief + triumph, in which she rejoiced as if it were enduring + success. But she suddenly fell from it in the dust. "Oh, what + can I do for him? How can I make him feel more and more that + I would give up anything, everything, for him! could see that + he was unhappy, as I did once! If I could see that he was at + all different since—since——Oh, what I dread + is this smooth tranquillity! If our lives could only be + stormy and full of cares and anxieties and troubles that I + could take on myself, then, then I shouldn't be afraid of the + future! But I'm afraid they won't be so—no, Mrs. Bowen, + do you think he cares for me?" + </p> + <p> + Mrs Bowen turned white; she did not speak. + </p> + <p> + had forced myself on him through a mistake, and he had taken + me to save me from the shame of knowing that I had made a + mistake. Do you think that is true? If you can only tell me + that it isn't—Or, no! If it is true, tell me that! + <i>That</i> would be real mercy." + </p> + <p> + The other trembled, as if physically beaten upon by this + appeal. But she gathered herself together rigidly. "How can I + answer you such a thing as that? I mustn't listen to you; you + mustn't ask me." She turned and left the girl standing still + in her attitude of imploring. But in her own room, where she + locked herself in, sobs mingled with the laughter which broke + crazily from her lips as she removed this ribbon and that + jewel, and pulled the bracelets from her wrists. A man would + have plunged from the house and walked the night away; a + woman must wear it out in her bed. + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p><a name="XX"><!--Marker--></a> + <h2> + XX + </h2><br> + <br> + + <p> + In the morning Mrs. Bowen received a note from her banker + covering a despatch by cable from America. It was from + Imogene's mother; it acknowledged the letters they had + written, and announced that she sailed that day for + Liverpool. It was dated at New York, and it was to be + inferred that after perhaps writing in answer to their + letters, she had suddenly made up her mind to come out. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, that is it," said Imogene, to whom Mrs. Bowen hastened + with the despatch. "Why should she have telegraphed to + <i>you</i>?" she asked coldly, but with a latent fire of + resentment in her tone. + </p> + <p> + "You must ask her when she comes," returned Mrs. Bowen, with + all her gentleness. "It won't be long now." + </p> + <p> + They looked as if they had neither of them slept; but the + girl's vigil seemed to have made her wild and fierce, like + some bird that has beat itself all night against its cage, + and still from time to time feebly strikes the bars with its + wings. Mrs. Bowen was simply worn to apathy. + </p> + <p> + "What shall you do about this?" she asked. + </p> + <p> + "Do about it? Oh, I will think. I will try not to trouble + you." + </p> + <p> + "Imogene!" + </p> + <p> + "I shall have to tell Mr. Colville. But I don't know that I + shall tell him at once. Give me the despatch, please." She + possessed herself of it greedily, offensively. "I shall ask + you not to speak of it." + </p> + <p> + "I will do whatever you wish." + </p> + <p> + "Thank you." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen left the room, but she turned immediately to + re-open the door she had closed behind her. + </p> + <p> + "We were to have gone to Fiesole to-morrow," she said + inquiringly. + </p> + <p> + "We can still go if the day is fine," returned the girl. + "Nothing is changed. I wish very much to go. Couldn't we go + to-day?" she added, with eager defiance. + </p> + <p> + "It's too late to-day," said Mrs. Bowen quietly. "I will + write to remind the gentlemen." + </p> + <p> + "Thank you. I wish we could have gone to-day." + </p> + <p> + "You can have the carriage if you wish to drive anywhere," + said Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + "I will take Effie to see Mrs. Amsden." But Imogene changed + her mind, and went to call upon two Misses Guicciardi, the + result of an international marriage, whom Mrs. Bowen did not + like very well. Imogene drove with them to the Cascine, where + they bowed to a numerous military acquaintance, and they + asked her if Mrs. Bowen would let her join them in a theatre + party that evening: they were New-Yorkers by birth, and it + was to be a theatre party in the New York style; they were to + be chaperoned by a young married lady; two young men cousins + of theirs, just out from America, had taken the box. + </p> + <p> + When Imogene returned home she told Mrs. Bowen that she had + accepted this invitation. Mrs. Bowen said nothing, but when + one of the young men came up to hand Imogene down to the + carriage, which was waiting with the others at the gate, she + could not have shown a greater tolerance of his second-rate + New Yorkiness if she had been a Boston dowager offering him + the scrupulous hospitalities of her city. + </p> + <p> + Imogene came in at midnight; she hummed an air of the opera + as she took off her wraps and ornaments in her room, and this + in the quiet of the hour had a terrible, almost profane + effect: it was as if some other kind of girl had whistled. + She showed the same nonchalance at breakfast, where she was + prompt, and answered Mrs. Bowen's inquiries about her + pleasure the night before with a liveliness that ignored the + polite resolution that prompted them. + </p> + <p> + Mr. Morton was the first to arrive, and if his discouragement + began at once, the first steps masked themselves in a + reckless welcome, which seemed to fill him with joy, and Mrs. + Bowen with silent perplexity. The girl ran on about her + evening at the opera, and about the weather, and the + excursion they were going to make; and after an apparently + needless ado over the bouquet which he brought her, together + with one for Mrs. Bowen, she put it into her belt, and made + Colville notice it when he came: he had not thought to bring + flowers. + </p> + <p> + He turned from her hilarity with anxious question to Mrs. + Bowen, who did not meet his eye, and who snubbed Effie when + the child found occasion to whisper: "<i>I</i> think Imogene + is acting very strangely, for <i>her</i>; don't you, mamma? + It seems as if going with those Guicciardi girls just once + had spoiled her." + </p> + <p> + "Don't make remarks about people, Effie," said her mother + sharply. "It isn't nice in little girls, and I don't want you + to do it. You talk too much lately." + </p> + <p> + Effie turned grieving away from this rejection, and her face + did not light up even at the whimsical sympathy in Colville's + face, who saw that she had met a check of some sort; he had + to take her on his knee and coax and kiss her before her + wounded feelings were visibly healed. He put her down with a + sighing wish that some one could take him up and soothe his + troubled sensibilities too, and kept her hand in his while he + sat waiting for the last of those last moments in which the + hurrying delays of ladies preparing for an excursion seem + never to end. + </p> + <p> + When they were ready to get into the carriage, the usual + contest of self-sacrifice arose, which Imogene terminated by + mounting to the front seat; Mr. Morton hastened to take the + seat beside her, and Colville was left to sit with Effie and + her mother. "You old people will be safer back there," said + Imogene. It was a little joke which she addressed to the + child, but a gleam from her eye as she turned to speak to the + young man at her side visited Colville in desperate defiance. + He wondered what she was about in that allusion to an idea + which she had shrunk from so sensitively hitherto. But he + found himself in a situation which he could not penetrate at + any point. When he spoke with Mrs. Bowen, it was with a dark + undercurrent of conjecture as to how and when she expected + him to tell Mr. Morton of his relation to Imogene, or whether + she still expected him to do it; when his eyes fell upon the + face of the young man, he despaired as to the terms in which + he should put the fact; any form in which he tacitly + dramatised it remained very embarrassing, for he felt bound + to say that while he held himself promised in the matter, he + did not allow her to feel herself so. + </p> + <p> + A sky of American blueness and vastness, a mellow sun, and a + delicate breeze did all that these things could for them, as + they began the long, devious climb of the hills crowned by + the ancient Etruscan city. At first they were all in the + constraint of their own and one another's moods, known or + imagined, and no talk began till the young clergyman turned + to Imogene and asked, after a long look at the smiling + landscape, "What sort of weather do you suppose they are + having at Buffalo to-day?" + </p> + <p> + "At Buffalo?" she repeated, as if the place had only a dim + existence in her remotest consciousness. "Oh! The ice isn't + near out of the lake yet. You can't count on it before the + first of May." + </p> + <p> + "And the first of May comes sooner or later, according to the + season," said Colville. "I remember coming on once in the + middle of the month, and the river was so full of ice between + Niagara Falls and Buffalo that I had to shut the car window + that I'd kept open all the way through Southern Canada. But + we have very little of that local weather at home; our + weather is as democratic and continental as our political + constitution. Here it's March or May any time from September + till June, according as there's snow on the mountains or + not." + </p> + <p> + The young man smiled. "But don't you like," he asked with + deference, "this slow, orderly advance of the Italian spring, + where the flowers seem to come out one by one, and every + blossom has its appointed time?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes, it's very well in its way; but I prefer the rush of + the American spring; no thought of mild weather this morning; + a warm, gusty rain to-morrow night; day after to-morrow a + burst of blossoms and flowers and young leaves and birds. I + don't know whether we were made for our climate or our + climate was made for us, but its impatience and lavishness + seem to answer some inner demand of our go-ahead souls. This + happens to be the week of the peach blossoms here, and you + see their pink everywhere to-day, and you don't see anything + else in the blossom line. But imagine the American spring + abandoning a whole week of her precious time to the exclusive + use of peach blossoms! She wouldn't do it; she's got too many + other things on hand." + </p> + <p> + Effie had stretched out over Colville's lap, and with her + elbow sunk deep in his knee, was renting her chin in her hand + and taking the facts of the landscape thoroughly in. "Do they + have just a week?" she asked. + </p> + <p> + "Not an hour more or less," said Colville. "If they found an + almond blossom hanging round anywhere after their time came, + they would make an awful row; and if any lazy little + peach-blow hadn't got out by the time their week was up, it + would have to stay in till next year; the pear blossoms + wouldn't let it come out." + </p> + <p> + "Wouldn't they?" murmured the child, in dreamy sympathy with + this belated peach-blow. + </p> + <p> + "Well, that's what people say. In America it would be allowed + to come out any time. It's a free country." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen offered to draw Effie back to a posture of more + decorum, but Colville put his arm round the little girl. "Oh, + let her stay! It doesn't incommode me, and she must be + getting such a novel effect of the landscape." + </p> + <p> + The mother fell back into her former attitude of jaded + passivity. He wondered whether she had changed her mind about + having him speak to Mr. Morton; her quiescence might well + have been indifference; one could have said, knowing the + whole situation, that she had made up her mind to let things + take their course, and struggle with them no longer. + </p> + <p> + He could not believe that she felt content with him; she must + feel far otherwise; and he took refuge, as he had the power + of doing, from the discomfort of his own thoughts in jesting + with the child, and mocking her with this extravagance and + that; the discomfort then became merely a dull ache that + insisted upon itself at intervals, like a grumbling tooth. + </p> + <p> + The prospect was full of that mingled wildness and + subordination that gives its supreme charm to the Italian + landscape; and without elements of great variety, it combined + them in infinite picturesqueness. There were olive orchards + and vineyards, and again vineyards and olive orchards. Closer + to the farm-houses and cottages there were peaches and other + fruit trees and kitchen-gardens; broad ribbons of grain waved + between the ranks of trees; around the white villas the + spires of the cypresses pierced the blue air. Now and then + they came to a villa with weather-beaten statues strutting + about its parterres. A mild, pleasant heat brooded upon the + fields and roofs, and the city, dropping lower and lower as + they mounted, softened and blended its towers and monuments + in a sombre mass shot with gleams of white. + </p> + <p> + Colville spoke to Imogene, who withdrew her eyes from it with + a sigh, after long brooding upon the scene. "You can do + nothing with it, I see." + </p> + <p> + "With what?" + </p> + <p> + "The landscape. It's too full of every possible interest. + What a history is written all over it, public and private! If + you don't take it simply like any other landscape, it becomes + an oppression. It's well that tourists come to Italy so + ignorant, and keep so. Otherwise they couldn't live to get + home again; the past would crush them." + </p> + <p> + Imogene scrutinised him as if to extract some personal + meaning from his words, and then turned her head away. The + clergyman addressed him with what was like a respectful + toleration of the drolleries of a gifted but eccentric man, + the flavour of whose talk he was beginning to taste. + </p> + <p> + "You don't really mean that one shouldn't come to Italy as + well informed as possible?" + </p> + <p> + "Well, I did," said Colville, "but I don't." + </p> + <p> + The young man pondered this, and Imogene started up with an + air of rescuing them from each other—as if she would + not let Mr. Morton think Colville trivial or Colville + consider the clergyman stupid, but would do what she could to + take their minds off the whole question. Perhaps she was not + very clear as to how this was to be done; at any rate she did + not speak, and Mrs. Bowen came to her support, from whatever + motive of her own. It might have been from a sense of the + injustice of letting Mr. Morton suffer from the complications + that involved herself and the others. The affair had been + going very hitchily ever since they started, with the burden + of the conversation left to the two men and that helpless + girl; if it were not to be altogether a failure she must + interfere." + </p> + <p> + "Did you ever hear of Gratiano when you were in Venice?" she + asked Mr. Morton. + </p> + <p> + "Is he one of their new water-colourists?" returned the young + man. "I heard they had quite a school there now." + </p> + <p> + "No," said Mrs. Bowen, ignoring her failure as well as she + could; "he was a famous talker; he loved to speak an infinite + deal of nothing more than any man in Venice." + </p> + <p> + "An ancestor of mine, Mr. Morton," said Colville; "a poor, + honest man, who did his best to make people forget that the + ladies were silent. Thank you, Mrs. Bowen, for mentioning + him. I wish he were with us to-day." + </p> + <p> + The young man laughed. "Oh, in the <i>Merchant of + Venice</i>!" + </p> + <p> + "No other," said Colville. + </p> + <p> + "I confess," said Mrs. Bowen, "that I <i>am</i> rather stupid + this morning. I suppose it's the softness of the air; it's + been harsh and irritating so long. It makes me drowsy." + </p> + <p> + "Don't mind <i>us</i>," returned Colville. "We will call you + at important points." They were driving into a village at + which people stop sometimes to admire the works of art in its + church. "Here, for example, is—What place is this?" he + asked of the coachman. + </p> + <p> + "San Domenico." + </p> + <p> + "I should know it again by its beggars." Of all ages and + sexes they swarmed round the carriage, which the driver had + instinctively slowed to oblige them, and thrust forward their + hands and hats. Colville gave Effie his small change to + distribute among them, at sight of which they streamed down + the street from every direction. Those who had received + brought forward the halt and blind, and did not scruple to + propose being rewarded for this service. At the same time + they did not mind his laughing in their faces; they laughed + too, and went off content, or as nearly so as beggars ever + are. He buttoned up his pocket as they drove on more rapidly. + "I am the only person of no principle—except + Effie—in the carriage, and yet I am at this moment + carrying more blessings out of this village than I shall ever + know what to do with. Mrs. Bowen, I know, is regarding me + with severe disapproval. She thinks that I ought to have sent + the beggars of San Domenico to Florence, where they would all + be shut up in the Pia Casa di Ricovero, and taught some + useful occupation. It's terrible in Florence. You can walk + through Florence now and have no appeal made to your better + nature that is not made at the appellant's risk of + imprisonment. When I was there before, you had opportunities + of giving at every turn." + </p> + <p> + "You can send a cheque to the Pia Casa," said Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + "Ah, but what good would that do me? When I give I want the + pleasure of it; I want to see my beneficiary cringe under my + bounty. But I've tried in vain to convince you that the world + has gone wrong in other ways. Do you remember the one-armed + man whom we used to give to on the Lung' Arno? That + persevering sufferer has been repeatedly arrested for + mendicancy, and obliged to pay a fine out of his hard + earnings to escape being sent to your Pia Casa." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen smiled, and said, Was he living yet? in a pensive + tone of reminiscence. She was even more than patient of + Colville's nonsense. It seemed to him that the light under + her eyelids was sometimes a grateful light. Confronting + Imogene and the young man whose hopes of her he was to + destroy at the first opportunity, the lurid moral atmosphere + which he breathed seemed threatening to become a thing + apparent to sense, and to be about to blot the landscape. He + fought it back as best he could, and kept the hovering cloud + from touching the earth by incessant effort. At times he + looked over the side of the carriage, and drew secretly a + long breath of fatigue. It began to be borne in upon him that + these ladies were using him ill in leaving him the burden of + their entertainment. He became angry, but his heart softened, + and he forgave them again, for he conjectured that he was the + cause of the cares that kept them silent. He felt certain + that the affair had taken some new turn. He wondered if Mrs. + Bowen had told Imogene what she had demanded of him. But he + could only conjecture and wonder in the dreary undercurrent + of thought that flowed evenly and darkly on with the talk he + kept going. He made the most he could of the varying views of + Florence which the turns and mounting levels of the road gave + him. He became affectionately grateful to the young clergyman + when he replied promptly and fully, and took an interest in + the objects or subjects he brought up. + </p> + <p> + Neither Mrs. Bowen nor Imogene was altogether silent. The one + helped on at times wearily, and the other broke at times from + her abstraction. Doubtless the girl had undertaken too much + in insisting upon a party of pleasure with her mind full of + so many things, and doubtless Mrs. Bowen was sore with a + rankling resentment at her insistence, and vexed at herself + for having yielded to it. If at her time of life and with all + her experience of it, she could not rise under this inner + load, Imogene must have been crushed by it. + </p> + <p> + Her starts from the dreamy oppression, if that were what kept + her silent, took the form of aggression, when she disagreed + with Colville about things he was saying, or attacked him for + this or that thing which he had said in times past. It was an + unhappy and unamiable self-assertion, which he was not able + to compassionate so much when she resisted or defied Mrs. + Bowen, as she seemed seeking to do at every point. Perhaps + another would not have felt it so; it must have been largely + in his consciousness; the young clergyman seemed not to see + anything in these bursts but the indulgence of a gay caprice, + though his laughing at them did not alleviate the effect to + Colville, who, when he turned to Mrs. Bowen for her alliance, + was astonished with a prompt snub, unmistakable to himself, + however imperceptible to others. + </p> + <p> + He found what diversion and comfort he could in the party of + children who beset them at a point near the town, and + followed the carriage, trying to sell them various light and + useless trifles made of straw—fans, baskets, parasols, + and the like. He bought recklessly of them and gave them to + Effie, whom he assured, without the applause of the ladies, + and with the grave question of the young clergyman, that the + vendors were little Etruscan girls, all at least twenty-five + hundred years old. "It's very hard to find any Etruscans + under that age; most of the grown-up people are three + thousand." + </p> + <p> + The child humoured his extravagance with the faith in fable + which children are able to command, and said, "Oh, tell me + about them!" while she pushed up closer to him, and began to + admire her presents, holding them up before her, and dwelling + fondly upon them one by one. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, there's very little to tell," answered Colville. + "They're mighty close people, and always keep themselves very + much <i>to</i> themselves. But wouldn't you like to see a + party of Etruscans of all ages, even down to little babies + only eleven or twelve hundred years old, come driving into an + American town? It would make a great excitement, wouldn't + it?" + </p> + <p> + "It would be splendid." + </p> + <p> + "Yes; we would give them a collation in the basement of the + City Hall, and drive them out to the cemetery. The Americans + and Etruscans are very much alike in that—they always + show you their tombs." + </p> + <p> + "Will they in Fiesole?" + </p> + <p> + "How you always like to burrow into the past!" interrupted + Imogene. + </p> + <p> + "Well, it's rather difficult burrowing into the future," + returned Colville defensively. Accepting the challenge, he + added: "Yes, I should really like to meet a few Etruscans in + Fiesole this morning. I should feel as if I'd got amongst my + contemporaries at last; they would understand me." + </p> + <p> + The girl's face flushed. "Then no one else can understand + you?" + </p> + <p> + "Apparently not. I am the great American <i>incompris</i>." + </p> + <p> + "I'm sorry for you," she returned feebly; and, in fact, + sarcasm was not her strong point. + </p> + <p> + When they entered the town they found the Etruscans + preoccupied with other visitors, whom at various points in + the quaint little piazza they surrounded in dense groups, to + their own disadvantage as guides and beggars and dealers in + straw goods. One of the groups reluctantly dispersed to + devote itself to the new arrivals, and these then perceived + that it was a party of artists, scattered about and + sketching, which had absorbed the attention of the + population. Colville went to the restaurant to order lunch, + leaving the ladies to the care of Mr. Morton. When he came + back he found the carriage surrounded by the artists, who had + turned out to be the Inglehart boys. They had walked up to + Fiesole the afternoon before, and they had been sketching + there all the morning. With the artist's indifference to the + conventional objects of interest, they were still ignorant of + what ought to be seen in Fiesole by tourists, and they + accepted Colville's proposition to be of his party in going + the rounds of the Cathedral, the Museum, and the view from + that point of the wall called the Belvedere. They found that + they had been at the Belvedere before without knowing that it + merited particular recognition, and some of them had made + sketches from it—of bits of architecture and landscape, + and of figure amongst the women with straw fans and baskets + to sell, who thronged round the whole party again, and + interrupted the prospect. In the church they differed amongst + themselves as to the best bits for study, and Colville + listened in whimsical despair to the enthusiasm of their + likings and dislikings. All that was so far from him now; but + in the Museum, which had only a thin interest based upon a + small collection of art and archeology, he suffered a real + affliction in the presence of a young Italian couple, who + were probably plighted lovers. They went before a grey-haired + pair, who might have been the girl's father and mother, and + they looked at none of the objects, though they regularly + stopped before them and waited till their guide had said his + say about them. The girl, clinging tight to the young man's + arm, knew nothing but him; her mouth and eyes were set in a + passionate concentration of her being upon him, and he seemed + to walk in a dream of her. From time to time they peered upon + each other's faces, and then they paused, rapt and + indifferent to all besides. + </p> + <p> + The young painters had their jokes about it; even Mr. Morton + smiled, and Mrs. Bowen recognised it. But Imogene did not + smile; she regarded the lovers with an interest in them + scarcely less intense than their interest in each other; and + a cold perspiration of question broke out on Colville's + forehead. Was that her ideal of what her own engagement + should be? Had she expected him to behave in that way to her, + and to accept from her a devotion like that girl's? How + bitterly he must have disappointed her! It was so impossible + to him that the thought of it made him feel that he must + break all ties which bound him to anything like it. And yet + he reflected that the time was when he could have been equal + to that, and even more. + </p> + <p> + After lunch the painters joined them again, and they all went + together to visit the ruins of the Roman theatre and the + stretch of Etruscan wall beyond it. The former seems older + than the latter, whose huge blocks of stone lie as firmly and + evenly in their courses as if placed there a year ago; the + turf creeps to the edge at top, and some small trees nod + along the crest of the wall, whose ancient face, clean and + bare, looks sternly out over a vast prospect, now young and + smiling in the first delight of spring. The piety or interest + of the community, which guards the entrance to the theatre by + a fee of certain centesimi, may be concerned in keeping the + wall free from the grass and vines which are stealing the + half-excavated arena back to forgetfulness and decay; but + whatever agency it was, it weakened the appeal that the wall + made to the sympathy of the spectators. + </p> + <p> + They could do nothing with it; the artists did not take their + sketch-blocks from their pockets. But in the theatre, where a + few broken columns marked the place of the stage, and the + stone benches of the auditorium were here and there reached + by a flight of uncovered steps, the human interest returned. + </p> + <p> + "I suspect that there is such a thing as a ruin's being too + old," said Colville. "Our Etruscan friends made the mistake + of building their wall several thousand years too soon for + our purpose." + </p> + <p> + "Yes," consented the young clergyman. "It seems as if our own + race became alienated from us through the mere effect of + time, don't you think, sir? I mean, of course, + terrestrially." + </p> + <p> + The artists looked uneasy, as if they had not counted upon + anything of this kind, and they began to scatter about for + points of view. Effie got her mother's leave to run up and + down one of the stairways, if she would not fall. Mrs. Bowen + sat down on one of the lower steps, and Mr. Morton took his + place respectfully near her. + </p> + <p> + "I wonder how it looks from the top?" Imogene asked this of + Colville, with more meaning than seemed to belong to the + question properly. + </p> + <p> + "There is nothing like going to see," he suggested. He helped + her up, giving her his hand from one course of seats to + another. When they reached the point which commanded the best + view of the whole, she sat down, and he sank at her feet, but + they did not speak of the view. + </p> + <p> + "Theodore, I want to tell you something," she said abruptly. + "I have heard from home." + </p> + <p> + "Yes?" he replied, in a tone in which he did his best to + express a readiness for any fate. + </p> + <p> + "Mother has telegraphed. She is coming out. She is on her way + now. She will be here very soon." + </p> + <p> + Colville did not know exactly what to say to these + passionately consecutive statements. "Well?" he said at last. + </p> + <p> + "Well"—she repeated his word—"what do you intend + to do?" + </p> + <p> + "Intend to do in what event?" he asked, lifting his eyes for + the first time to the eyes which he felt burning down upon + him. + </p> + <p> + "If she should refuse?" + </p> + <p> + Again he could not command an instant answer, but when it + came it was a fair one. "It isn't for me to say what I shall + do," he replied gravely. "Or, if it is, I can only say that I + will do whatever you wish." + </p> + <p> + "Do <i>you</i> wish nothing?" + </p> + <p> + "Nothing but your happiness." + </p> + <p> + "Nothing but my happiness!" she retorted. "What is my + happiness to me? Have I ever sought it?" + </p> + <p> + "I can't say," he answered; "but if I did not think you would + find it—" + </p> + <p> + "I shall find it, if ever I find it, in yours," she + interrupted. "And what shall you do if my mother will not + consent to our engagement?" + </p> + <p> + The experienced and sophisticated man—for that in no + ill way was what Colville was—felt himself on trial for + his honour and his manhood by this simple girl, this child. + He could not endure to fall short of her ideal of him at that + moment, no matter what error or calamity the fulfilment + involved. "If you feel sure that you love me, Imogene, it + will make no difference to me what your mother says. I would + be glad of her consent; I should hate to go counter to her + will; but I know that I am good enough man to be true and + keep you all my life the first in all my thoughts, and that's + enough for me. But if you have any fear, any doubt of + yourself, now is the time—" + </p> + <p> + Imogene rose to her feet as in some turmoil of thought or + emotion that would not suffer her to remain quiet. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, keep still!" "Don't get up yet!" "Hold on a minute, + please!" came from the artists in different parts of the + theatre, and half a dozen imploring pencils were waved in the + air. + </p> + <p> + "They are sketching you," said Colville, and she sank + compliantly into her seat again. + </p> + <p> + "I have no doubt for myself—no," she said, as if there + had been no interruption. + </p> + <p> + "Then we need have no anxiety in meeting your mother," said + Colville, with a light sigh, after a moment's pause. "What + makes you think she will be unfavourable?" + </p> + <p> + "I don't think that; but I thought—I didn't know + but—" + </p> + <p> + "What?" + </p> + <p> + "Nothing, now." Her lips were quivering; he could see her + struggle for self-control, but he could not see it unmoved. + </p> + <p> + "Poor child!" he said, putting out his hand toward her. + </p> + <p> + "Don't take my hand; they're all looking," she begged. + </p> + <p> + He forbore, and they remained silent and motionless a little + while, before she had recovered herself sufficiently to speak + again. + </p> + <p> + "Then we are promised to each other, whatever happens," she + said. + </p> + <p> + "Yes." + </p> + <p> + "And we will never speak of this again. But there is one + thing. Did Mrs. Bowen ask you to tell Mr. Morton of our + engagement?" + </p> + <p> + "She said that I ought to do so." + </p> + <p> + "And did you say you would?" + </p> + <p> + "I don't know. But I suppose I ought to tell him." + </p> + <p> + "I don't wish you to!" cried the girl. + </p> + <p> + "You don't wish me to tell him?" + </p> + <p> + "No; I will not have it!" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, very well; it's much easier not. But it seems to me that + it's only fair to him." + </p> + <p> + "Did you think of that yourself?" she demanded fiercely. + </p> + <p> + "No," returned Colville, with sad self-recognition. "I'm + afraid I'm not apt to think of the comforts and rights of + other people. It was Mrs. Bowen who thought of it." + </p> + <p> + "I knew it!" + </p> + <p> + "But I must confess that I agreed with her, though I would + have preferred to postpone it till we heard from your + family." He was thoughtfully silent a moment; then he said, + "But if their decision is to have no weight with us, I think + he ought to be told at once." + </p> + <p> + "Do you think that I am flirting with him?" + </p> + <p> + "Imogene!" exclaimed Colville reproachfully. + </p> + <p> + "That's what you imply; that's what she implies." + </p> + <p> + "You're very unjust to Mrs. Bowen, Imogene." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, you always defend her! It isn't the first time you've + told me I was unjust to her." + </p> + <p> + "I don't mean that you are willingly unjust, or could be so, + to any living creature, least of all to her. But + I—we—owe her so much; she has been so patient." + </p> + <p> + "What do we owe her? How has she been patient?" + </p> + <p> + "She has overcome her dislike to me." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, indeed!" + </p> + <p> + "And—and I feel under obligation to her for—in a + thousand little ways; and I should be glad to feel that we + were acting with her approval; I should like to please her." + </p> + <p> + "You wish to tell Mr. Morton?" + </p> + <p> + "I think I ought." + </p> + <p> + "To please Mrs. Bowen! Tell him, then! You always cared more + to please her than me. Perhaps you stayed in Florence to + please her!" + </p> + <p> + She rose and ran down the broken seats and ruined steps so + recklessly and yet so sure-footedly that it seemed more like + a flight than a pace to the place where Mrs. Bowen and Mr. + Morton were talking together. + </p> + <p> + Colville followed as he could, slowly and with a heavy heart. + A good thing develops itself in infinite and unexpected + shapes of good; a bad thing into manifold and astounding + evils. This mistake was whirling away beyond his recall in + hopeless mazes of error. He saw this generous young spirit + betrayed by it to ignoble and unworthy excess, and he knew + that he and not she was to blame. + </p> + <p> + He was helpless to approach her, to speak with her, to set + her right, great as the need of that was, and he could see + that she avoided him. But their relations remained outwardly + undisturbed. The artists brought their sketches for + inspection and comment, and, without speaking to each other, + he and Imogene discussed them with the rest. + </p> + <p> + When they started homeward the painters said they were coming + a little way with them for a send-off, and then going back to + spend the night in Fiesole. They walked beside the carriage, + talking with Mrs. Bowen and Imogene, who had taken their + places, with Effie between them, on the back seat; and when + they took their leave, Colville and the young clergyman, who + had politely walked with them, continued on foot a little + further, till they came to the place where the highway to + Florence divided into the new road and the old. At this point + it steeply overtops the fields on one side, which is shored + up by a wall some ten or twelve feet deep; and here round a + sharp turn of the hill on the other side came a peasant + driving a herd of the black pigs of the country. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen's horses were, perhaps, pampered beyond the + habitual resignation of Florentine horses to all manner of + natural phenomena; they reared at sight of the sable crew, + and backing violently uphill, set the carriage across the + road, with its hind wheels a few feet from the brink of the + wall. The coachman sprang from his seat, the ladies and the + child remained in theirs as if paralysed. + </p> + <p> + Colville ran forward to the side of the carriage. "Jump, Mrs. + Bowen! jump, Effie! Imogene—" + </p> + <p> + The mother and the little one obeyed. He caught them in his + arms and set them down. The girl sat still, staring at him + with reproachful, with disdainful eyes. + </p> + <p> + He leaped forward to drag her out; she shrank away, and then + he flew to help the coachman, who had the maddened horses by + the bit. + </p> + <p> + "Let go!" he heard the young clergyman calling to him; "she's + safe!" He caught a glimpse of Imogene, whom Mr. Morton had + pulled from the other side of the carriage. He struggled to + free his wrist from the curb-bit chain of the horse, through + which he had plunged it in his attempt to seize the bridle. + The wheels of the carriage went over the wall; he felt + himself whirled into the air, and then swung ruining down + into the writhing and crashing heap at the bottom of the + wall. + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p><a name="XXI"><!--Marker--></a> + <h2> + XXI + </h2><br> + <br> + + <p> + When Colville came to himself his first sensation was delight + in the softness and smoothness of the turf on which he lay. + Then the strange colour of the grass commended itself to his + notice, and presently he perceived that the thing under his + head was a pillow, and that he was in bed. He was supported + in this conclusion by the opinion of the young man who sat + watching him a little way off, and who now smiled cheerfully + at the expression in the eyes which Colville turned + inquiringly upon him. + </p> + <p> + "Where am I?" he asked, with what appeared to him very + unnecessary feebleness of voice. + </p> + <p> + The young man begged his pardon in Italian, and when Colville + repeated his question in that tongue, he told him that he was + in Palazzo Pinti, whither he had been brought from the scene + of his accident. He added that Colville must not talk till + the doctor had seen him and given him leave, and he explained + that he was himself a nurse from the hospital, who had been + taking care of him. + </p> + <p> + Colville moved his head and felt the bandage upon it; he + desisted in his attempt to lift his right arm to it before + the attendant could interfere in behalf of the broken limb. + He recalled dimly and fragmentarily long histories that he + had dreamed, but he forbore to ask how long he had been in + his present case, and he accepted patiently the apparition of + the doctor and other persons who came and went, and were at + his bedside or not there, as it seemed to him, between the + opening and closing of an eye. As the days passed they + acquired greater permanence and maintained a more + uninterrupted identity. He was able to make quite sure of Mr. + Morton and of Mr. Waters; Mrs. Bowen came in, leading Effie, + and this gave him a great pleasure. Mrs. Bowen seemed to have + grown younger and better. Imogene was not among the phantoms + who visited him; and he accepted her absence as quiescently + as he accepted the presence of the others. There was a + cheerfulness in those who came that permitted him no anxiety, + and he was too weak to invite it by any conjecture. He + consented to be spared and to spare himself; and there were + some things about the affair which gave him a singular and + perhaps not wholly sane content. One of these was the man + nurse who had evidently taken care of him throughout. He + celebrated, whenever he looked at this capable person, his + escape from being, in the odious helplessness of sickness, a + burden upon the strength and sympathy of the two women for + whom he had otherwise made so much trouble. His satisfaction + in this had much to do with his recovery, which, when it once + began, progressed rapidly to a point where he was told that + Imogene and her mother were at a hotel in Florence, waiting + till he should be strong enough to see them. It was Mrs. + Bowen who told him this with an air which she visibly strove + to render non-committal and impersonal, but which betrayed, + nevertheless, a faint apprehension for the effect upon him. + The attitude of Imogene and her mother was certainly not one + to have been expected of people holding their nominal + relation to him, but Colville had been revising his + impressions of events on the day of his accident; Imogene's + last look came back to him, and he could not think the + situation altogether unaccountable. + </p> + <p> + "Have I been here a long time?" he asked, as if he had not + heeded what she told him. + </p> + <p> + "About a fortnight," answered Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + "And Imogene—how long has she been away?" + </p> + <p> + "Since they knew you would get well." + </p> + <p> + "I will see them any time," he said quietly. + </p> + <p> + "Do you think you are strong enough?" + </p> + <p> + "I shall never be stronger till I have seen them," he + returned, with a glance at her. "Yes; I want them to come + to-day. I shall not be excited; don't be troubled—if + you were going to be," he added. "Please send to them at + once." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen hesitated, but after a moment left the room. She + returned in half an hour with a lady who revealed even to + Colville's languid regard evidences of the character which + Mrs. Bowen had attributed to Imogene's mother. She was a + large, robust person, laced to sufficient shapeliness, and + she was well and simply dressed. She entered the room with a + waft of some clean, wholesome perfume, and a quiet + temperament and perfect health looked out of her clear, + honest eyes—the eyes of Imogene Graham, though the + girl's were dark and the woman's were blue. When Mrs. Bowen + had named them to each other, in withdrawing, Mrs. Graham + took Colville's weak left hand in her fresh, strong, right, + and then lifted herself a chair to his bedside, and sat down. + </p> + <p> + "How do you do to-day, sir?" she said, with a touch of + old-fashioned respectfulness in the last word. "Do you think + you are quite strong enough to talk with me?" + </p> + <p> + "I think so," said Colville, with a faint smile. "At least I + can listen with fortitude." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Graham was not apparently a person adapted to joking. "I + don't know whether it will require much fortitude to hear + what I have to say or not," she said, with her keen gaze + fixed upon him. "It's simply this: I am going to take Imogene + home." + </p> + <p> + She seemed to expect that Colville would make some reply to + this, and he said blankly, "Yes?" + </p> + <p> + "I came out prepared to consent to what she wished, after I + had seen you, and satisfied myself that she was not mistaken; + for I had always promised myself that her choice should be + perfectly untrammelled, and I have tried to bring her up with + principles and ideas that would enable her to make a good + choice." + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said Colville again. "I'm afraid you didn't take her + temperament and her youth into account, and that she + disappointed you." + </p> + <p> + "No; I can't say that she did. It isn't that at all. I see no + reason to blame her for her choice. Her mistake was of + another kind." + </p> + <p> + It appeared to Colville that this very sensible and judicial + lady found an intellectual pleasure in the analysis of the + case, which modified the intensity of her maternal feeling in + regard to it, and that, like many people who talk well, she + liked to hear herself talk in the presence of another + appreciative listener. He did not offer to interrupt her, and + she went on. "No, sir, I am not disappointed in her choice. I + think her chances of happiness would have been greater, in + the abstract, with one nearer her own age; but that is a + difference which other things affect so much that it did not + alarm me greatly. Some people are younger at your age than at + hers. No, sir, that is not the point." Mrs. Graham fetched a + sigh, as if she found it easier to say what was not the point + than to say what was, and her clear gaze grew troubled. But + she apparently girded herself for the struggle. "As far as + you are concerned, Mr. Colville, I have not a word to say. + Your conduct throughout has been most high-minded and + considerate and delicate." + </p> + <p> + It is hard for any man to deny merits attributed to him, + especially if he has been ascribing to himself the opposite + demerits. But Colville summoned his dispersed forces to + protest against this. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, no, no," he cried. "Anything but that. My conduct has + been selfish and shameful. If you could understand + all—" + </p> + <p> + "I think I do understand all—at least far more, I + regret to say, than my daughter has been willing to tell me. + And I am more than satisfied with you. I thank you and honour + you." + </p> + <p> + "Oh no; don't say that," pleaded Colville. "I really can't + stand it." + </p> + <p> + "And when I came here it was with the full intention of + approving and confirming Imogene's decision. But I was met at + once by a painful and surprising state of things. You are + aware that you have been very sick?" + </p> + <p> + "Dimly," said Colville. + </p> + <p> + "I found you very sick, and I found my daughter frantic at + the error which she had discovered in + herself—discovered too late, as she felt." Mrs. Graham + hesitated, and then added abruptly, "She had found out that + she did not love you." + </p> + <p> + "Didn't love me?" repeated Colville feebly. + </p> + <p> + "She had been conscious of the truth before, but she had + stifled her misgivings insanely, and, as I feel, almost + wickedly, pushing on, and saying to herself that when you + were married, then there would be no escape, and she + <i>must</i> love you." + </p> + <p> + "Poor girl! poor child! I see, I see." + </p> + <p> + "But the accident that was almost your death saved her from + that miserable folly and iniquity. Yes," she continued, in + answer to the protest in his face, "folly and iniquity. I + found her half crazed at your bedside. She was fully aware of + your danger, but while she was feeling all the remorse that + she ought to feel—that any one could feel—she was + more and more convinced that she never had loved you and + never should. I can give you no idea of her state of mind." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, you needn't! you needn't! Poor, poor child!" + </p> + <p> + "Yes, a child indeed. If it had not been for the pity I felt + for her—But no matter about that. She saw at last that + if your heroic devotion to her"—Colville did his best + to hang his pillowed head for shame—"if your present + danger did not awaken her to some such feeling for you as she + had once imagined she had; if they both only increased her + despair and self-abhorrence, then the case was indeed + hopeless. She was simply distracted. I had to tear her away + almost by force. She has had a narrow escape from + brain-fever. And now I have come to implore, to + <i>demand</i>"—Mrs. Graham, with all her poise and + calm, was rising to the hysterical key—"her release + from a fate that would be worse than death for such a girl. I + mean marrying without the love of her whole soul. She esteems + you, she respects you, she admires you, she likes you; + but—" Mrs. Graham pressed her lips together, and her + eyes shone. + </p> + <p> + "She is free," said Colville, and with the words a mighty + load rolled from his heart. "There is no need to demand + anything." + </p> + <p> + "I know." + </p> + <p> + "There hasn't been an hour, an instant, during—since + I—we—spoke together that I wouldn't have released + her if I could have known what you tell me now." + </p> + <p> + "Of course!—of course!" + </p> + <p> + "I have had my fears—my doubts; but whenever I + approached the point I found no avenue by which we could + reach a clearer understanding. I could not say much without + seeming to seek for myself the release I was offering her." + </p> + <p> + "Naturally. And what added to her wretchedness was the + suspicion at the bottom of all that she had somehow forced + herself upon you—misunderstood you, and made you say + and do things to spare her that you would not have done + voluntarily." This was advanced tentatively. In the midst of + his sophistications Colville had, as most of his sex have, a + native, fatal, helpless truthfulness, which betrayed him at + the most unexpected moments, and this must now have appeared + in his countenance. The lady rose haughtily. She had + apparently been considering him, but, after all, she must + have been really considering her daughter. "If anything of + the kind was the case," she said, "I will ask you to spare + her the killing knowledge. It's quite enough for <i>me</i> to + know it. And allow me to say, Mr. Colville, that it would + have been far kinder in you—" + </p> + <p> + "Ah, <i>think,</i> my dear madam!" he exclaimed. "How + <i>could</i> I?" + </p> + <p> + She did think, evidently, and when she spoke it was with a + generous emotion, in which there was no trace of pique. + </p> + <p> + "You couldn't. You have done right; I feel that, and I will + trust you to say anything you will to my daughter." + </p> + <p> + "To your daughter? Shall I see her?" + </p> + <p> + "She came with me. She wished to beg your forgiveness." + </p> + <p> + Colville lay silent. "There is no forgiveness to be asked or + granted," he said, at length. "Why should she suffer the pain + of seeing me?—for it would be nothing else. What do you + think? Will it do her any good hereafter? I don't care for + myself." + </p> + <p> + "I don't know what to think," said Mrs. Graham. "She is a + strange child. She may have some idea of reparation." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, beseech her from me not to imagine that any reparation + is due! Where there has been an error there must be blame; + but wherever it lies in ours, I am sure it isn't at her door. + Tell her I say this; tell her that I acquit her with all my + heart of every shadow of wrong; that I am not unhappy, but + glad for her sake and my own that this has ended as it has." + He stretched his left hand across the coverlet to her, and + said, with the feebleness of exhaustion, "Good-bye. Bid her + good-bye for me." + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Graham pressed his hand and went out. A moment after the + door was flung open, and Imogene burst into the room. She + threw herself on her knees beside his bed. "I will + <i>pray</i> to you!" she said, her face intense with the + passions working in her soul. She seemed choking with words + which would not come; then, with an inarticulate cry that + must stand for all, she caught up the hand that lay limp on + the coverlet; she crushed it against her lips, and ran out of + the room. + </p> + <p> + He sank into a deathly torpor, the physical refusal of his + brain to take account of what had passed. When he woke from + it, little Effie Bowen was airily tiptoeing about the room, + fondly retouching its perfect order. He closed his eyes, and + felt her come to him and smooth the sheet softly under his + chin. Then he knew she must be standing with clasped hands + admiring the effect. Some one called her in whisper from the + door. It closed, and all was still again. + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p><a name="XXII"><!--Marker--></a> + <h2> + XXII + </h2><br> + <br> + + <p> + Colville got himself out of the comfort and quiet of Mrs. + Bowen's house as soon as he could. He made the more haste + because he felt that if he could have remained with the + smallest trace of self-respect, he would have been glad to + stay there for ever. + </p> + <p> + Even as it was, the spring had advanced to early summer, and + the sun was lying hot and bright in the piazzas, and the + shade dense and cool in the narrow streets, before he left + Palazzo Pinti; the Lung' Arno was a glare of light that + struck back from the curving line of the buff houses; the + river had shrivelled to a rill in its bed; the black + cypresses were dim in the tremor of the distant air on the + hill-slopes beyond; the olives seemed to swelter in the sun, + and the villa walls to burn whiter and whiter. At evening the + mosquito began to wind his tiny horn. It was the end of May, + and nearly everybody but the Florentines had gone out of + Florence, dispersing to Villa Reggio by the sea, to the hills + of Pistoja, and to the high, cool air of Siena. More than + once Colville had said that he was keeping Mrs. Bowen after + she ought to have got away, and she had answered that she + liked hot weather, and that this was not comparable to the + heat of Washington in June. She was looking very well, and + younger and prettier than she had since the first days of + their renewed acquaintance in the winter. Her southern + complexion enriched itself in the sun; sometimes when she + came into his room from outdoors the straying brown hair + curled into loose rings on her temples, and her cheeks glowed + a deep red. + </p> + <p> + She said those polite things to appease him as long as he was + not well enough to go away, but she did not try to detain him + after his strength sufficiently returned. It was the blow on + the head that kept him longest. After his broken arm and his + other bruises were quite healed, he was aware of physical + limits to thinking of the future or regretting the past, and + this sense of his powerlessness went far to reconcile him to + a life of present inaction and oblivion. Theoretically he + ought to have been devoured by remorse and chagrin, but as a + matter of fact he suffered very little from either. Even in + people who are in full possession of their capacity for + mental anguish one observes that after they have undergone a + certain amount of pain they cease to feel. + </p> + <p> + Colville amused himself a good deal with Effie's endeavours + to entertain him and take care of him. The child was with him + every moment that she could steal from her tasks, and her + mother no longer attempted to stem the tide of her devotion. + It was understood that Effie should joke and laugh with Mr. + Colville as much as she chose; that she should fan him as + long as he could stand it; that she should read to him when + he woke, and watch him when he slept. She brought him his + breakfast, she petted him and caressed him, and wished to + make him a monster of dependence and self-indulgence. It + seemed to grieve her that he got well so fast. + </p> + <p> + The last night before he left the house she sat on his knee + by the window looking out beyond the firefly twinkle of + Oltrarno, to the silence and solid dark of the solemn company + of hills beyond. They had not lighted the lamps because of + the mosquitoes, and they had talked till her head dropped + against his shoulder. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen came in to get her. "Why, is she asleep?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes. Don't take her yet," said Colville. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen rustled softly into the chair which Effie had left + to get into Colville's lap. Neither of them spoke, and he was + so richly content with the peace, the tacit sweetness of the + little moment, that he would have been glad to have it + silently endure forever. If any troublesome question of his + right to such a moment of bliss obtruded itself upon him, he + did not concern himself with it. + </p> + <p> + "We shall have another hot day to-morrow," said Mrs. Bowen at + length. "I hope you will find your room comfortable." + </p> + <p> + "Yes: it's at the back of the hotel, mighty high, and wide, + and no sun ever comes into it except when they show it to + foreigners in winter. Then they get a few rays to enter as a + matter of business, on condition that they won't detain them. + I dare say I shall stay there some time. I suppose you will + be getting away from Florence very soon. + </p> + <p> + "Yes. But I haven't decided where to go yet." + </p> + <p> + "Should you like some general expression of my gratitude for + all you've done for me, Mrs. Bowen?" + </p> + <p> + "No; I would rather not. It has been a great + pleasure—to Effie." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, a luxury beyond the dreams of avarice." They spoke in + low tones, and there was something in the hush that suggested + to Colville the feasibility of taking into his unoccupied + hand one of the pretty hands which the pale night-light + showed him lying in Mrs. Bowen's lap. But he forbore, and + only sighed. "Well, then, I will say nothing. But I shall + keep on thinking all my life." + </p> + <p> + She made no answer. + </p> + <p> + "When you are gone, I shall have to make the most of Mr. + Waters," he said. + </p> + <p> + "He is going to stop all summer, I believe." + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes. When I suggested to him the other day that he might + find it too hot, he said that he had seventy New England + winters to thaw out of his blood, and that all the summers he + had left would not be more than he needed. One of his friends + told him that he could cook eggs in his piazza in August, and + he said that he should like nothing better than to cook eggs + there. He's the most delightfully expatriated compatriot I've + ever seen." + </p> + <p> + "Do you like it?" + </p> + <p> + "It's well enough for him. Life has no claims on him any + more. I think it's very pleasant over here, now that + everybody's gone," added Colville, from a confused + resentfulness of collectively remembered Days and Afternoons + and Evenings. "How still the night is!" + </p> + <p> + A few feet clapping by on the pavement below alone broke the + hush. + </p> + <p> + "Sometimes I feel very tired of it all, and want to get + home," sighed Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + "Well, so do I." + </p> + <p> + "I can't believe it's right staying away from the country so + long." People often say such things in Europe. + </p> + <p> + "No, I don't either, if you've got anything to do there." + </p> + <p> + "You can always make something to do there." + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes." Some young young men, breaking from a street near + by, began to sing. "We shouldn't have that sort of thing at + home." + </p> + <p> + "No," said Mrs. Bowen pensively. + </p> + <p> + "I heard just such singing before I fell asleep the night + after that party at Madame Uccelli's, and it filled me with + fury." + </p> + <p> + "Why should it do that?" + </p> + <p> + "I don't know. It seemed like voices from our + youth—Lina." + </p> + <p> + She had no resentment of his use of her name in the tone with + which she asked: "Did you hate that so much?" + </p> + <p> + "No; the loss of it." + </p> + <p> + They both fetched a deep breath. + </p> + <p> + "The Uccellis have a villa near the baths of Lucca," said + Mrs. Bowen. "They have asked me to go." + </p> + <p> + "Do you think of going?" inquired Colville. "I've always + fancied it must be pleasant there." + </p> + <p> + "No; I declined. Sometimes I think I will just stay on in + Florence." + </p> + <p> + "I dare say you'd find it perfectly comfortable. There's + nothing like having the range of one's own house in summer." + He looked out of the window on the blue-black sky. + </p> + <p> + "'And deepening through their silent + spheres,<br> + Heaven over heaven rose the night,'" + </p> + <p><br> + he quoted. "It's wonderful! Do you remember how I used to + read <i>Mariana in the South</i> to you and poor Jenny? How + it must have bored her! What an ass I was!" + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said Mrs. Bowen breathlessly, in sympathy with his + reminiscence rather than in agreement with his + self-denunciation. + </p> + <p> + Colville broke into a laugh, and then she began to laugh to; + but not quite willingly as it seemed. + </p> + <p> + Effie started from her sleep. "What—what is it?" she + asked, stretching and shivering as half-wakened children do. + </p> + <p> + "Bed-time," said her mother promptly, taking her hand to lead + her away. "Say good-night to Mr. Colville." + </p> + <p> + The child turned and kissed him. "Good night," she murmured. + </p> + <p> + "Good night, you sleepy little soul!" It seemed to Colville + that he must be a pretty good man, after all, if this little + thing loved him so. + </p> + <p> + "Do you always kiss Mr. Colville good-night?" asked her + mother when she began to undo her hair for her in her room. + </p> + <p> + "Sometimes. Don't you think it's nice?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes; nice enough." + </p> + <p> + Colville sat by the window a long time thinking Mrs. Bowen + might come back; but she did not return. + </p> + <p> + Mr. Waters came to see him the next afternoon at his hotel. + </p> + <p> + "Are you pretty comfortable here?" he asked. + </p> + <p> + "Well, it's a change," said Colville. "I miss the little one + awfully." + </p> + <p> + "She's a winning child," admitted the old man. "That + combination of conventionality and <i>naïveté</i> + is very captivating. I notice it in the mother." + </p> + <p> + "Yes, the mother has it too. Have you seen them to-day?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes; Mrs. Bowen was sorry to be out when you came." + </p> + <p> + "I had the misfortune to miss them. I had a great mind to go + again to-night." + </p> + <p> + The old man said nothing to this. "The fact is," Colville + went on, "I'm so habituated to being there that I'm rather + spoiled." + </p> + <p> + "Ah, it's a nice place," Mr. Waters admitted. + </p> + <p> + "Of course I made all the haste I could to get away, and I + have the reward of a good conscience. But I don't find that + the reward is very great." + </p> + <p> + The old gentleman smiled. "The difficulty is to know + conscience from self-interest." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, there's no doubt of it in my case," said Colville. "If + I'd consulted my own comfort and advantage, I should still be + at Palazzo Pinti." + </p> + <p> + "I dare say they would have been glad to keep you." + </p> + <p> + "Do you really think so?" asked Colville, with sudden + seriousness. "I wish you would tell me why. Have you any + reason—grounds? Pshaw! I'm absurd!" He sank back into + the easy-chair from whose depths he had pulled himself in the + eagerness of his demand, and wiped his forehead with his + handkerchief. "Mr. Waters, you remember my telling you of my + engagement to Miss Graham?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes." + </p> + <p> + "That is broken off—if it were ever really on. It was a + great mistake for both of us—a tragical one for her, + poor child, a ridiculous one for me. My only consolation is + that it was a mistake and no more; but I don't conceal from + myself that I might have prevented it altogether if I had + behaved with greater wisdom and dignity at the outset. But + I'm afraid I was flattered by an illusion of hers that ought + to have pained and alarmed me, and the rest followed + inevitably, though I was always just on the point of escaping + the consequences of my weakness—my wickedness." + </p> + <p> + "Ah, there is something extremely interesting in all that," + said the old minister thoughtfully. "The situation used to be + figured under the old idea of a compact with the devil. His + debtor was always on the point of escaping, as you say, but I + recollect no instance in which he did not pay at last. The + myth must have arisen from man's recognition of the + inexorable sequence of cause from effect, in the moral world, + which even repentance cannot avert. Goethe tries to imagine + an atonement for Faust's trespass against one human soul in + his benefactions to the race at large; but it is a very + cloudy business." + </p> + <p> + "It isn't quite a parallel case," said Colville, rather + sulkily. He had, in fact, suffered more under Mr. Waters's + generalisation than he could from a more personal philosophy + of the affair. + </p> + <p> + "Oh no; I didn't think that," consented the old man. + </p> + <p> + "And I don't think I shall undertake any extended scheme of + drainage or subsoiling in atonement for my little dream," + Colville continued, resenting the parity of outline that grew + upon him in spite of his protest. They were both silent for a + while, and then Colville cried out, "Yes, yes; they are + alike. <i>I</i> dreamed, too, of recovering and restoring my + own lost and broken past in the love of a young soul, and it + was in essence the same cruelly egotistic dream; and it's + nothing in my defence that it was all formless and undirected + at first, and that as soon as I recognised it I abhorred it." + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes, it is," replied the old man, with perfect + equanimity. "Your assertion is the hysterical excess of + Puritanism in all times and places. In the moral world we are + responsible only for the wrong that we intend. It can't he + otherwise." + </p> + <p> + "And the evil that's suffered from the wrong we didn't + intend?" + </p> + <p> + "Ah, perhaps that isn't evil." + </p> + <p> + "It's pain!" + </p> + <p> + "It's pain, yes." + </p> + <p> + "And to have wrung a young and innocent heart with the + anguish of self-doubt, with the fear of wrong to another, + with the shame of an error such as I allowed, perhaps + encouraged her to make—" + </p> + <p> + "Yes," said the old man. "The young suffer terribly. But they + recover. Afterward we don't suffer so much, but we don't + recover. I wouldn't defend you against yourself if I thought + you seriously in the wrong. If you know yourself to be, you + shouldn't let me." + </p> + <p> + Thus put upon his honour, Colville was a long time + thoughtful. "How can I tell?" he asked. "You know the facts; + you can judge." + </p> + <p> + "If I were to judge at all, I should say you were likely to + do a greater wrong than any you have committed." + </p> + <p> + "I don't understand you." + </p> + <p> + "Miss Graham is a young girl, and I have no doubt that the + young clergyman—what was his name?" + </p> + <p> + "Morton. Do you think—do you suppose there was anything + in that?" demanded Colville, with eagerness, that a more + humorous observer than Mr. Waters might have found ludicrous. + "He was an admirable young fellow, with an excellent head and + a noble heart. I underrated him at one time, though I + recognised his good qualities afterward; but I was afraid she + did not appreciate him." + </p> + <p> + "I'm not so sure of that," said the old man, with an + astuteness of manner which Colville thought authorised by + some sort of definite knowledge. + </p> + <p> + "I would give the world if it were so!" he cried fervently. + </p> + <p> + "But you are really very much more concerned in something + else." + </p> + <p> + "In what else?" + </p> + <p> + "Can't you imagine?" + </p> + <p> + "No," said Colville; but he felt himself growing very red in + the face. + </p> + <p> + "Then I have no more to say." + </p> + <p> + "Yes, speak!" And after an interval Colville added, "Is it + anything about—you hinted at something long + ago—Mrs. Bowen?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes;" the old man nodded his head. "Do you owe her nothing?" + </p> + <p> + "Owe her nothing? Everything! My life! What self-respect is + left me! Immeasurable gratitude! The homage of a man saved + from himself as far as his stupidity and selfishness would + permit! Why, I—I love her!" The words gave him courage. + "In every breath and pulse! She is the most beautiful and + gracious and wisest and best woman in the world! I have loved + her ever since I met her here in Florence last winter. Good + heavens! I must have always loved her! But," he added, + falling from the rapture of this confession, "she simply + loathes <i>me</i>!" + </p> + <p> + "It was certainly not to your credit that you were willing at + the same time to marry some one else." + </p> + <p> + "Willing! I wasn't willing! I was bound hand and foot! + Yes—I don't care what you think of my weakness—I + was not a free agent. It's very well to condemn one's-self, + but it may be carried too far; injustice to others is not the + only injustice, or the worst. What I was willing to do was to + keep my word—to prevent that poor child, if possible, + from ever finding out her mistake." + </p> + <p> + If Colville expected this heroic confession to impress his + listener he was disappointed. Mr. Waters made him no reply, + and he was obliged to ask, with a degree of sarcastic + impatience, "I suppose you scarcely blame me for that?" + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I don't know that I blame people for things. There are + times when it seems as if we were all puppets, pulled this + way or that, without control of our own movements. Hamlet was + able to browbeat Rosencrantz and Guildenstern with his + business of the pipe; but if they had been in a position to + answer they might have told him that it required far less + skill to play upon a man than any other instrument. Most of + us, in fact, go sounding on without any special application + of breath or fingers, repeating the tunes that were played + originally upon other men. It appears to me that you suffered + yourself to do something of the kind in this affair. We are a + long time learning to act with common-sense or even common + sanity in what are called matters of the affections. A broken + engagement may be a bad thing in some cases, but I am + inclined to think that it is the very best thing that could + happen in most cases where it happens. The evil is done long + before; the broken engagement is merely sanative, and so far + beneficent." + </p> + <p> + The old gentleman rose, and Colville, dazed by the + recognition of his own cowardice and absurdity, did not try + to detain him. But he followed him down to the outer gate of + the hotel. The afternoon sun was pouring into the piazza a + sea of glimmering heat, into which Mr. Waters plunged with + the security of a salamander. He wore a broad-brimmed Panama + hat, a sack coat of black alpaca, and loose trousers of the + same material, and Colville fancied him doubly defended + against the torrid waves not only by the stored cold of half + a century of winters at Haddam East Village, but by an inner + coolness of spirit, which appeared to diffuse itself in an + appreciable atmosphere about him. It was not till he was gone + that Colville found himself steeped in perspiration, and + glowing with a strange excitement. + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p><a name="XXIII"><!--Marker--></a> + <h2> + XXIII + </h2><br> + <br> + + <p> + Colville went back to his own room, and spent a good deal of + time in the contemplation of a suit of clothes, adapted to + the season, which had been sent home from the tailor's just + before Mr. Waters came in. The coat was of the lightest + serge, the trousers of a pearly grey tending to lavender, the + waistcoat of cool white duck. On his way home from Palazzo + Pinti he had stopped in Via Tornabuoni and bought some silk + gauze neckties of a tasteful gaiety of tint, which he had at + the time thought very well of. But now, as he spread out the + whole array on his bed, it seemed too emblematic of a light + and blameless spirit for his wear. He ought to put on + something as nearly analogous to sackcloth as a modern stock + of dry-goods afforded; he ought, at least, to wear the grave + materials of his winter costume. But they were really + insupportable in this sudden access of summer. Besides, he + had grown thin during his sickness, and the things bagged + about him. If he were going to see Mrs. Bowen that evening, + he ought to go in some decent shape. It was perhaps + providential that he had failed to find her at home in the + morning, when he had ventured thither in the clumsy attire in + which he had been loafing about her drawing-room for the past + week. He now owed it to her to appear before her as well as + he could. How charmingly punctilious she always was herself! + </p> + <p> + As he put on his new clothes he felt the moral support which + the becomingness of dress alone can give. With the blue silk + gauze lightly tied under his collar, and the lapels of his + thin coat thrown back to admit his thumbs to his waistcoat + pockets, he felt almost cheerful before his glass. Should he + shave? As once before, this important question occurred to + him. His thinness gave him some advantages of figure, but he + thought that it made his face older. What effect would + cutting off his beard have upon it? He had not seen the lower + part of his face for fifteen years. No one could say what + recent ruin of a double chin might not be lurking there. He + decided not to shave, at least till after dinner, and after + dinner he was too impatient for his visit to brook the + necessary delay. + </p> + <p> + He was shown into the salotto alone, but Effie Bowen came + running in to meet him. She stopped suddenly, bridling. + </p> + <p> + "You never expected to see me looking quite so pretty," said + Colville, tracing the cause of her embarrassment to his + summer splendour. "Where is your mamma?" + </p> + <p> + "She is in the dining-room," replied the child, getting hold + of his hand. "She wants you to come and have coffee with us." + </p> + <p> + "By all means—not that I haven't had coffee already, + though." + </p> + <p> + She led the way, looking up at him shyly over her shoulder as + they went. + </p> + <p> + Mrs. Bowen rose, napkin in lap, and gave him a hand of + welcome. "How are you feeling to-day?" she asked, politely + ignoring his finery. + </p> + <p> + "Like a new man," he said. And then he added, to relieve the + strain of the situation, "Of the best tailor's make in + Florence." + </p> + <p> + "You look very well," she smiled. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I always do when I take pains," said Colville. "The + trouble is that I don't always take pains. But I thought I + would to-night, in upon a lady." + </p> + <p> + "Effie will feel very much flattered," said Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + "Don't refuse a portion of the satisfaction," he cried. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, is it for me too?" + </p> + <p> + This gave Colville consolation which no religion or + philosophy could have brought him, and his pleasure was not + marred, but rather heightened, by the little pangs of + expectation, bred by long custom, that from moment to moment + Imogene would appear. She did not appear, and a thrill of + security succeeded upon each alarm. He wished her well with + all his heart; such is the human heart that he wished her + arrived home the bretrothed of that excellent, that wholly + unobjectionable young man, Mr. Morton. + </p> + <p> + "Will you have a little of the ice before your coffee?" asked + Mrs. Bowen, proposing one of the moulded creams with her + spoon. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, thank you. Perhaps I will take it in place of the + coffee. They forgot to offer us any ice at the <i>table + d'hôte</i> this evening." + </p> + <p> + "This is rather luxurious for us," said Mrs. Bowen. "It's a + compromise with Effie. She wanted me to take her to Giacosa's + this afternoon." + </p> + <p> + "I <i>thought</i> you would come," whispered the child to + Colville. + </p> + <p> + Her mother made a little face of mock surprise at her. "Don't + give yourself away, Effie." + </p> + <p> + "Why, let us go to Giacosa's too," said Colville, taking the + ice. "We shall be the only foreigners there, and we shall not + even feel ourselves foreign. It's astonishing how the hot + weather has dispersed the tourists. I didn't see a Baedeker + on the whole way up here, and I walked down Via Tornabuoni + across through Porta Rosso and the Piazza della Signoria and + the Uffizzi. You've no idea how comfortable and home-like it + was—all the statues loafing about in their shirt + sleeves, and the objects of interest stretching and yawning + round, and having a good rest after their winter's work." + </p> + <p> + Effie understood Colville's way of talking well enough to + enjoy this; her mother did not laugh. + </p> + <p> + "Walked?" she asked. + </p> + <p> + "Certainly. Why not?" + </p> + <p> + "You are getting well again. You'll soon be gone too." + </p> + <p> + "I've <i>got</i> well. But as to being gone, there's no + hurry. I rather think I shall wait now to see how long you + stay." + </p> + <p> + "We may keep you all summer," said Mrs. Bowen, dropping her + eyelids indifferently. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, very well. All summer it is, then. Mr. Waters is going + to stay, and he is such a very cool old gentleman that I + don't think one need fear the wildest antics of the mercury + where he is." + </p> + <p> + When Colville had finished his ice, Mrs. Bowen led the way to + the salotto; and they all sat down by the window there and + watched the sunset die on San Miniato. The bronze copy of + Michelangelo's David, in the Piazzale below the church, + blackened in perfect relief against the pink sky and then + faded against the grey while they talked. They were so + domestic that Colville realised with difficulty that this was + an image of what might be rather than what really was; the + very ease with which he could apparently close his hand upon + the happiness within his grasp unnerved him. The talk strayed + hither and thither, and went and came aimlessly. A sound of + singing floated in from the kitchen, and Effie eagerly asked + her mother if she might go and see Maddalena. Maddalena's + mother had come to see her, and she was from the mountains. + </p> + <p> + "Yes, go," said Mrs. Bowen; "but don't stay too long." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I will be back in time," said the child, and Colville + remembered that he had proposed going to Giacosa's. + </p> + <p> + "Yes; don't forget." He had forgotten it himself. + </p> + <p> + "Maddalena is the cook," explained Mrs. Bowen. "She sings + ballads to Effie that she learned from her mother, and I + suppose Effie wants to hear them at first hand." + </p> + <p> + "Oh yes," said Colville dreamily. + </p> + <p> + They were alone now, and each little silence seemed freighted + with a meaning deeper than speech. + </p> + <p> + "Have you seen Mr. Waters to-day?" asked Mrs. Bowen, after + one of these lapses. + </p> + <p> + "Yes; he came this afternoon." + </p> + <p> + "He is a very strange old man. I should think he would be + lonely here." + </p> + <p> + "He seems not to be. He says he finds company in the history + of the place. And his satisfaction at having got out of + Haddam East Village is perennial." + </p> + <p> + "But he will want to go back there before he dies." + </p> + <p> + "I don't know. He thinks not. He's a strange old man, as you + say. He has the art of putting all sorts of ideas into + people's heads. Do you know what we talked about this + afternoon?" + </p> + <p> + "No, I don't," murmured Mrs. Bowen. + </p> + <p> + "About you. And he encouraged me to + believe—imagine—that I might speak to + you—ask—tell you that—I loved you, Lina." + He leaned forward and took one of the hands that lay in her + lap. It trembled with a violence inconceivable in relation to + the perfect quiet of her attitude. But she did not try to + take it away. "Could you—do you love me?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes," she whispered; but here she sprang up and slipped from + his hold altogether, as with an inarticulate cry of rapture + he released her hand to take her in his arms. + </p> + <p> + He followed her a pace or two. "And you will—will be my + wife?" he pursued eagerly. + </p> + <p> + "Never!" she answered, and now Colville stopped short, while + a cold bewilderment bathed him from head to foot. It must be + some sort of jest, though he could not tell where the humour + was, and he could not treat it otherwise than seriously. + </p> + <p> + "Lina, I have loved you from the first moment that I saw you + this winter, and Heaven knows how long before!" + </p> + <p> + "Yes; I know that." + </p> + <p> + "And every moment." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I know that too." + </p> + <p> + "Even if I had no sort of hope that you cared for me, I loved + you so much that I must tell you before we parted—" + </p> + <p> + "I expected that—I intended it." + </p> + <p> + "You intended it! and you do love me! And yet you + won't—Ah, I don't understand!" + </p> + <p> + "How could <i>you</i> understand? I love you—I blush + and burn for shame to think that I love you. But I will never + marry you; I can at least help doing that, and I can still + keep some little trace of self-respect. How you must really + despise me, to think of anything else, after all that has + happened! Did you suppose that I was merely waiting till that + poor girl's back was turned, as you were? Oh, how can you be + yourself, and still be yourself? Yes, Jenny Wheelwright was + right. You are too much of a mixture, Theodore + Colville"—her calling him so showed how often she had + thought of him so—"too much for her, too much for + Imogene, too much for me; too much for any woman except some + wretched creature who enjoys being trampled on and dragged + through the dust, as you have dragged me." + </p> + <p> + "<i>I</i> dragged <i>you</i> through the dust? There hasn't + been a moment in the past six months when I wouldn't have + rolled myself in it to please you." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, I knew that well enough! And do you think that was + flattering to me?" + </p> + <p> + "That has nothing to do with it. I only know that I love you, + and that I couldn't help wishing to show it even when I + wouldn't acknowledge it to myself. That is all. And now when + I am free to speak, and you own that you love me, you + won't—I give it up!" he cried desperately. But in the + next breath he implored, "<i>Why</i> do you drive me from + you, Lina?" + </p> + <p> + "Because you have humiliated me too much." She was perfectly + steady, but he knew her so well that in the twilight he knew + what bitterness there must be in the smile which she must be + keeping on her lips. "I was here in the place of her mother, + her best friend, and you made me treat her like an enemy. You + made me betray her and cast her off." + </p> + <p> + "I?" + </p> + <p> + "Yes, you! I knew from the very first that you did not really + care for her, that you were playing with yourself, as you + were playing with her, and I ought to have warned her." + </p> + <p> + "It appears to me you did warn her," said Colville, with some + resentful return of courage. + </p> + <p> + "I tried," she said simply, "and it made it worse. It made it + worse because I knew that I was acting for my own sake more + than hers, because I wasn't—disinterested." There was + something in this explanation, serious, tragic, as it was to + Mrs. Bowen, which made Colville laugh. She might have had + some perception of its effect to him, or it may have been + merely from a hysterical helplessness, but she laughed too a + little. + </p> + <p> + "But why," he gathered courage to ask, "do you still dwell + upon that? Mr. Waters told me that Mr. Morton—that + there was—" + </p> + <p> + "He is mistaken. He offered himself, and she refused him. He + told me." + </p> + <p> + "Oh!" + </p> + <p> + "Do you think she would do otherwise, with you lying here + between life and death? No: you can have no hope from that." + </p> + <p> + Colville, in fact, had none. This blow crushed and dispersed + him. He had not strength enough to feel resentment against + Mr. Waters for misleading him with this <i>ignis fatuus</i>. + </p> + <p> + "No one warned him, and it came to that," said Mrs. Bowen. + "It was of a piece with the whole affair. I was weak in that + too." + </p> + <p> + Colville did not attempt to reply on this point. He feebly + reverted to the inquiry regarding himself, and was far enough + from mirth in resuming it. + </p> + <p> + "I couldn't imagine," he said, "that you cared anything for + me when you warned another against me. If I could—" + </p> + <p> + "You put me in a false position from the beginning. I ought + to have sympathised with her and helped her instead of making + the poor child feel that somehow I hated her. I couldn't even + put her on guard against herself, though I knew all along + that she didn't really care for you, but was just in love + with her own fancy for you, Even after you were engaged I + ought to have broken it off; I ought to have been frank with + her; it was my duty; but I couldn't without feeling that I + was acting for myself too, and I would not submit to that + degradation. No! I would rather have died. I dare say you + don't understand. How could you? You are a man, and the kind + of man who couldn't. At every point you made me violate every + principle that was dear to me. I loathed myself for caring + for a man who was in love with me when he was engaged to + another. Don't think it was gratifying to me. It was + detestable; and yet I did let you see that I cared for you. + Yes, I even <i>tried</i> to make you care for + me—falsely, cruelly, treacherously." + </p> + <p> + "You didn't have to try very hard," said Colville, with a + sort of cold resignation to his fate. + </p> + <p> + "Oh no; you were quite ready for any hint. I could have told + her for her own sake that she didn't love you, but that would + have been for my sake too; and I would have told you if I + hadn't cared for you and known how you cared for me. I've + saved at least the consciousness of this from the wreck." + </p> + <p> + "I don't think it's a great treasure," said Colville. "I wish + that you had saved the consciousness of having been frank + even to your own advantage." + </p> + <p> + "Do you dare to reproach me, Theodore Colville? But perhaps + I've deserved this too." + </p> + <p> + "No, Lina, you certainly don't deserve it, if it's + unkindness, from me. go?" + </p> + <p> + She sank into a chair in sign of assent. He also sat down. He + had a dim impression that he could talk better if he took her + hand, but he did not venture to ask for it. He contented + himself with fixing his eyes upon as much of her face as he + could make out in the dusk, a pale blur in a vague outline of + dark. + </p> + <p> + "I want to assure you, Lina—Lina, my love, my dearest, + as I shall call you for the first and last time!—that I + <i>do</i> understand everything, as delicately and fully as + you could wish, all that you have expressed, and all that you + have left unsaid. I understand how high and pure your ideals + of duty are, and how heroically, angelically, you have + struggled to fulfil them, broken and borne down by my clumsy + and stupid selfishness from the start. I want you to believe, + my dearest love—you must forgive me!—that if I + didn't see everything at the time, I do see it now, and that + I prize the love you kept from me far more than any love you + could have given me to the loss of your self-respect. It + isn't logic—it sounds more like nonsense, I am + afraid—but you know what I mean by it. You are more + perfect, more lovely to me, than any being in the world, and + I accept whatever fate you choose for me. I would not win you + against your will if I could. You are sacred to me. If you + say we must part, I know that you speak from a finer + discernment than mine, and I submit. I will try to console + myself with the thought of your love, if I may not have you. + Yes, I submit." + </p> + <p> + His instinct of forbearance had served him better than the + subtlest art. His submission was the best defence. He rose + with a real dignity, and she rose also. "Remember," he said, + "that I confess all you accuse me of, and that I acknowledge + the justice of what you do—because you do it." He put + out his hand and took the hand which hung nerveless at her + side. "You are quite right. Good-bye." He hesitated a moment. + "May I kiss you, Lina?" He drew her to him, and she let him + kiss her on the lips. + </p> + <p> + "Good-bye," she whispered. "Go—" + </p> + <p> + "I am going." + </p> + <p> + Effie Bowen ran into the room from the kitchen. + </p> + <p> + "Aren't you going to take—" She stopped and turned to + her mother. She must not remind Mr. Colville of his + invitation; that was what her gesture expressed. + </p> + <p> + Colville would not say anything. He would not seize his + advantage, and play upon the mother's heart through the + feelings of her child, though there is no doubt that he was + tempted to prolong the situation by any means. Perhaps Mrs. + Bowen divined both the temptation and the resistance. "Tell + her," she said, and turned away. + </p> + <p> + "I can't go with you to-night, Effie," he said, stooping + toward her for the inquiring kiss that she gave him. "I + am—going away, and I must say good-bye." + </p> + <p> + The solemnity of his voice alarmed her. "Going away!" she + repeated. + </p> + <p> + "Yes—away from Florence. I'm afraid I shall not see you + again." + </p> + <p> + The child turned from him to her mother again, who stood + motionless. Then, as if the whole calamitous fact had + suddenly flashed upon her, she plunged her face against her + mother's breast. "I can't <i>bear</i> it!" she sobbed out; + and the reticence of her lamentation told more than a storm + of cries and prayers. + </p> + <p> + Colville wavered. + </p> + <p> + "Oh, you must stay!" said Lina, in the self-contemptuous + voice of a woman who falls below her ideal of herself. + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p><a name="XXIV"><!--Marker--></a> + <h2> + XXIV + </h2><br> + <br> + + <p> + In the levities which the most undeserving husbands permit + themselves with the severest of wives, there were times after + their marriage when Colville accused Lina of never really + intending to drive him away, but of meaning, after a + disciplinary ordeal, to marry him in reward of his tested + self-sacrifice and obedience. He said that if the appearance + of Effie was not a <i>coup de théâtre</i> + contrived beforehand, it was an accident of no consequence + whatever; that if she had not come in at that moment, her + mother would have found some other pretext for detaining him. + This is a point which I would not presume to decide. I only + know that they were married early in June before the syndic + of Florence, who tied a tricolour sash round his ample waist + for the purpose, and never looked more paternal or venerable + than when giving the sanction of the Italian state to their + union. It is not, of course, to be supposed that Mrs. + Colville was contented with the civil rite, though Colville + may have thought it quite sufficient. The religious ceremony + took place in the English chapel, the assistant clergyman + officiating in the absence of the incumbent, who had already + gone out of town. + </p> + <p> + The Rev. Mr. Waters gave away the bride, and then went home + to Palazzo Pinti with the party, the single and singularly + honoured guest at their wedding feast, for which Effie Bowen + went with Colville to Giacosa's to order the ices in person. + She has never regretted her choice of a step father, though + when Colville asked her how she would like him in that + relation she had a moment of hesitation, in which she + reconciled herself to it; as to him she had no misgivings. He + has sometimes found himself the object of little jealousies + on her part, but by promptly deciding all questions between + her and her mother in Effie's favour he has convinced her of + the groundlessness of her suspicions. + </p> + <p> + In the absence of any social pressure to the contrary, the + Colvilles spent the summer in Palazzo Pinti. Before their + fellow-sojourners returned from the <i>villeggiatura</i> in + the fall, however, they had turned their faces southward, and + they are now in Rome, where, arriving as a married couple, + there was no inquiry and no interest in their past. + </p> + <p> + It is best to be honest, and own that the affair with Imogene + has been the grain of sand to them. No one was to blame, or + very much to blame; even Mrs. Colville says that. It was a + thing that happened, but one would rather it had not + happened. + </p> + <p> + Last winter, however, Mrs Colville received a letter from + Mrs. Graham which suggested, if it did not impart, + consolation. "Mr. Morton was here the other day, and spent + the morning. He has a parish at Erie, and there is talk of + his coming to Buffalo." + </p> + <p> + "Oh, Heaven grant it!" said Colville, with sudden piety. + </p> + <p> + "Why?" demanded his wife. + </p> + <p> + "Well, I wish she was married." + </p> + <p> + "You have nothing whatever to do with her." + </p> + <p> + It took him some time to realise that this was the fact. + </p> + <p> + "No," he confessed; "but what do you think about it?" + </p> + <p> + "There is no telling. We are such simpletons! If a man will + keep on long enough—But if it isn't Mr. Morton, it will + be some one else—some <i>young</i> person." + </p> + <p> + Colville rose and went round the breakfast table to her. "I + hope so," he said. "<i>I</i> have married a young person, and + it would only be fair." + </p> + <p> + This magnanimity was irresistible. + </p> + <p> + THE END. + + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + <p> + + </p> + +<PRE> +*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK, INDIAN SUMMER *** + +This file should be named 8insm10h.htm or 8insm10h.zip +Corrected EDITIONS of our eBooks get a new NUMBER, 8insm11h.htm +VERSIONS based on separate sources get new LETTER, 8insm10ah.htm + + +Project Gutenberg eBooks are often created from several printed +editions, all of which are confirmed as Public Domain in the US +unless a copyright notice is included. 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