path: root/73187-0.txt

*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 73187 ***

Transcriber’s Note: This ebook contains both volumes.




MEMOIRS OF JAMES HARDY VAUX. IN TWO VOLUMES. VOLUME I.





                                 MEMOIRS
                                    OF
                            JAMES HARDY VAUX.

                           WRITTEN BY HIMSELF.

                            _IN TWO VOLUMES._

                                 VOL. I.

                                 LONDON:
          _PRINTED BY W. CLOWES, NORTHUMBERLAND-COURT, STRAND._
                               AND SOLD BY
                       ALL RESPECTABLE BOOKSELLERS.

                                  1819.




CONTENTS OF THE FIRST VOLUME.


    ADVERTISEMENT, _page_ vii.

    PREFACE, _page_ xi.

    DEDICATION, _page_ xv.

                               CHAPTER I.

    Some account of my family—My birth, and subsequent adventures,
    until I attain my ninth year, _page_ 1.

                                CHAP. II.

    I am taken from school, and return to my Grandparents—Remove
    to Cambridgeshire—From thence again to London, and a second
    time to S⸺shire—Different plans proposed for my settlement in
    life—Friendship of the Moultrie family—I am sent to Liverpool
    on liking, _page_ 9.

                               CHAP. III.

    My employment in my new situation—Seduced by an apprentice
    in the house to neglect my business, and keep irregular
    hours—Become a frequenter of the Cockpit—Repeated losses at
    this place induce me to recruit my finances by embezzling my
    employer’s money—Remonstrances on my misconduct producing no
    effect, am seriously admonished, and sent back to my friends,
    _page_ 16.

                                CHAP. IV.

    I prevail on my grandfather to let me visit London—Am provided
    with letters of recommendation—Received into the office of a
    respectable attorney, my kinsman—Quit that employment, and
    engage with a wholesale stationer—Obtain clothes, _&c._, on
    credit, without any intention of paying for them—Bilk my
    lodgings repeatedly—Return to the law—Obliged to live by my
    wits—Become a hackney waiter—Resort nightly to the Blue-Lion,
    _page_ 24.

                                CHAP. V.

    The trip to Portsmouth, _page_ 32.

                                CHAP. VI.

    Still much embarrassed to support appearances—Meet
    with a surgeon of a frigate—Our conversation and its
    result—Negotiation set on foot with the captain—I obtain
    an appointment as midshipman—Fitted out by my friends in
    the most liberal manner—Join my ship—Delighted with my new
    situation—Account of my messmates, and other matters, _page_ 53.

                               CHAP. VII.

    My rapid progress in navigation—Become a good sailor in
    theory—The approach of a severe winter somewhat damps
    my pleasure—Begin to repent my bargain—Duty excessively
    fatiguing, and situation uncomfortable—Advised to alter my
    course—Appointed captain’s clerk, and find myself at home
    to a peg—The frigate ordered up the river Thames—I visit
    London—Become enamoured of a fair Cyprian—Desert my ship on her
    account, _page_ 63.

                               CHAP. VIII.

    Consequences of my imprudent secession—Reduced to
    great distress—Become a billiard player—Associate with
    sharpers—Engage with a country attorney—Take leave of London
    once more, _page_ 74.

                                CHAP. IX.

    Account of my situation at Bury St. Edmunds—Obstinately
    determine to relinquish it, and return to London—Defraud
    several tradesmen—Quit the town, and arrive in the
    metropolis—Obtain a quantity of wearing apparel under false
    pretences, _page_ 91.

                                CHAP. X.

    Live gaily for a few weeks on the spoils of my late
    excursion—Again obliged to seek employment—Engage with
    a conveyancer in the Temple—Apprehended by my late
    master—Compromise the affair, through the friendship of a
    relation, _page_ 103.

                                CHAP. XI.

    Obtain an employment as clerk and shopman—Rob my employers, and
    embezzle several sums of money—Quit this service, and am soon
    after taken in custody, and committed to the Bastile, _page_
    112.

                               CHAP. XII.

    Fully committed for trial—Acquitted for want of evidence—Fatal
    consequences of consigning a young person to a gaol—Meet with a
    fellow-prisoner, who introduces me to the company of professed
    thieves—Live by fraud and robbery—Trip to Staines—Am at length
    apprehended for what I am innocent of, _page_ 128.

                               CHAP. XIII.

    Examined before the Lord Mayor—Fully committed—Tried and
    cast—My father’s faith and assurances—My disappointment on
    being transported for seven years—Contract the gaol distemper,
    and am reduced to the point of death—Recover my health, and am
    sent on board a transport for Botany Bay, _page_ 155.

                               CHAP. XIV.

    Sail from England—Account of our voyage—Arrive at Port
    Jackson—Write in my own behalf to Commissary Palmer—That
    gentleman is pleased to notice my application—Land at Sydney,
    and am carried before Governor King—A curious dialogue
    between His Excellency and myself—Ordered to Hawkesbury, as
    Store-keeper’s Clerk, _page_ 168.

                                CHAP. XV.

    My conduct at Hawkesbury—Continue for three years to give
    satisfaction to my principal—Ordered by Governor King into the
    Secretary’s Office—Give way to the temptations with which I am
    surrounded, and begin to lead a dissipated life, in company
    with some other clerks.—Concert a system of fraud upon the
    King’s stores, which we practise successfully for some time—The
    imposition is at length detected—I am in consequence dismissed
    the office, and sent to hard labour for the first time in my
    life, _page_ 176.

                               CHAP. XVI.

    Draughted to Castle-hill—Variously employed there—Appointed
    clerk to the Settlement—Again noticed by the Governor—Summoned
    to Parramatta by the Rev. Mr. Marsden—Appointed Magistrate’s
    Clerk, and begin once more to lead an easy life—Preparations
    for the Governor’s departure—Mr. Marsden gives me hopes of
    accompanying himself and the Governor to England in His
    Majesty’s Ship Buffalo—My pleasing sensations at the prospect
    of revisiting my native land, _page_ 186.

                               CHAP. XVII.

    The Buffalo being ready for sea, I receive an intimation from
    Mr. Marsden, that the late Governor obtained a remission of my
    unexpired time, and consents to take me home as his clerk—I
    wait on his Excellency accordingly, and receive orders to go on
    board—We set sail, _page_ 194.

                              CHAP. XVIII.

    Receive a free pardon from the hands of Captain (late Governor)
    King—Account of our passage home—Suffer a great deal from
    the want of provisions—Leaky state of the ship—Double Cape
    Horn—Fall in with an English frigate, bound to the river
    Plate—Arrive at Rio de Janeiro, _page_ 199.

                               CHAP. XIX.

    Account of my adventures at San Sebastian—Form acquaintance
    with a Portuguese family—Their affection for me—Overtures made
    to induce my stay in South America—The ship being repaired and
    victualled, we re-imbark and sail for Europe, _page_ 209.

                                CHAP. XX.

    The ship becomes as leaky as before—All hands in turn at the
    pumps—Means adopted to reduce the leaks—I offend the late
    Governor, who orders me before the mast—Fall in with the Thisbe
    a second time in company with several transports—Unhappy fate
    of one of them—Arrive at Spithead, _page_ 225.

                               CHAP. XXI.

    Captain King leaves the ship, which proceeds to Portsmouth
    harbour—My melancholy reflections on my confinement to the
    service—Preparations for paying off the Buffalo—Employed by
    the Purser in arranging the ships’ books—Write to London, and
    receive an answer from my mother—Obtain leave to go ashore very
    unexpectedly, and effect my escape through the friendly aid of
    a total stranger, _page_ 237.





ADVERTISEMENT.


It has been thought that the Public would benefit in more ways than one,
by the publication of a work, in which the philosopher may read the
workings of an unprincipled conscience, the legislator be let into the
operations of the laws upon the criminal’s mind, and the citizen derive
a key to the frauds by which he is so easily and constantly beset; and
it is not often that thieves are possessed of sufficient truth, memory,
vanity, and literature, to tell the story of their own lives. It will be
seen that Mr. Vaux, together with an excellent memory, possesses a good
share of vanity, and sufficient literature. In the following pages, the
former (I think) often magnifies the latter, particularly in the account
of the author’s readership at the printing-office; but it is only justice
to him to say, that I have found occasion to make very few alterations
in his manuscript, which came to my hands ready prefaced and dedicated,
and chaptered, as if ripe for his old master’s printing-office—that
it was exceedingly well and fairly transcribed; and, (with one or two
exceptions) correctly spelled and punctuated.

When Mr. Vaux’s predilection for low company comes to be observed, the
reader will justly doubt the great liberality of education and taste for
reading, upon which he so often vaunts himself. The quotations in his
narrative are all common-place; and I have struck out a few as profaned
by misapplication.

As for the truth of the following tale—nobody can vouch for it. I am
afraid it is occasionally sacrificed at the shrine of Vanity, who seems
to be the author’s patron-saint. He is fonder of confessing himself
guilty of frauds, from the punishment of which he escaped, than of those
in which he was found out; detection (he thinks) impeaches his cunning;
and though he recounts with exultation the theft for which he is now
transported for life, that is, because he knows it was committed under
protection of, perhaps, the most consummate address and assurance ever
exhibited by man—it amounted to the sublime of impudence—and, after all,
he was only betrayed into the hands of justice, who, if she had a hundred
eyes, would not (it should seem) have enough to detect the dissimulations
of James Hardy Vaux. The reader will observe, that he denies his guilt of
the crime for which he was before transported, because it was a common,
clumsy partnership picking a handkerchief out of the pocket; and so, too,
he denies any confederacy with the Judge Advocate’s servant, in robbing
his master’s writing-desk, for which offence he was further transported
to Newcastle, in this territory, whither he now again is sent for life,
for an attempt to escape from the country altogether. The reader must,
therefore, believe as much or as little as he pleases of the following
story. Of him who confesses himself a liar, the voice must necessarily
be listened to with distrust.

    “Look to him well; have a quick eye to see;
    He has deceiv’d another, and may thee.”

By the laws of all nations, he who is once detected in perjury, is not
allowed to bear further witness—the testimony of a king’s evidence must
be corroborated—and the confession of a felon is never allowed to prove
any thing against another person.

With this _caveat lector_, I dismiss this entertaining and instructive
narrative; for so I will call it, thinking it as full of cunning and
adventure as “The Life of Guzman de Alfarache—the Spanish Rogue,” if not
so profoundly moralized. The religion, indeed, (if it can be so called)
of Mr. Vaux is, like that of most convicts, a low sort of fatalism, which
may be called _a fatalism after the fact_. The followers of this sect
do not connect predestination with “foreknowledge absolute,” but merely
comfort themselves with the truism, that when their _misfortunes_ have
happened, nothing can prevent them from having happened. Of “free will,”
they first suffer the time for the exercise to go by, and then complain
of the impotency,—abandoning themselves with an insensibility, which they
mistake for resignation, to what they call the predestined and inevitable
decrees of “fixed fate[1].” Some of this false complaining has been
expunged from the following work; but enough (I am afraid) is left to
shew the delusion.

It remains only to be added, that the pecuniary profits of this
publication will be applied to the relief of the author, in his perpetual
banishment.

                                                                   B. F—D.

_Sydney, New South Wales, 18th May, 1817._




PREFACE.


Before I commence this narrative of a life marked with more than common
vicissitudes, I beg to bespeak the reader’s attention to a few cursory
remarks. I must first premise that I have undertaken the task, in
obedience to the commands of a gentleman, who is pleased to anticipate
a sufficient fund of entertainment in the perusal, to compensate for
the honour he confers in noticing an outcast of Fortune like myself;
who, partly from my own vicious conduct, and partly (perhaps,) from
the malignity of my fate, have forfeited all hope of attaining that
respectable rank in society, to which, in the happy days of youthful
innocence, I had every reason to look forward with confidence.

But now, alas! although I have too late seen my errors, and my intentions
are strictly virtuous, I have nothing to expect, but to continue
through the remainder of this transitory life, such as I am at the
present moment,—an unhappy exile, for ever banished from my country and
relations, and rendered incapable of making the smallest reparation
to the community I have injured, by the exercise of those talents
which nature has bestowed, and the best of friends have so liberally
cultivated. Nor do I fear being accused of vanity, in asserting, that
they are above mediocrity, since it is not to myself I am indebted for
them; and the greater infamy attaches to me for their perversion,—for
where much is given much is required.

To return to the remark I set out with: these sheets not being intended
at first for the press, or to meet the public eye, I have not laboured
their composition. Indeed, the work being executed in haste, and under
many local disadvantages, I have had little time for study, and can only
boast of a scrupulous attention to truth, to which I have been enjoined
by my employer.

Where my conduct has been such as I now blush at, I have “nothing
extenuated;” nor have I, on the other hand, used the smallest
embellishments to advance myself in the good opinion of my readers. With
me, in all human probability, the die is cast; and as the prejudices of
those persons, who alone can extricate me from misery, are not likely to
be removed by any professions of amendment I can make, my only hopes of
happiness are centred in a better world, where we are instructed that
there is much joy over one single repentant sinner.

                                                         JAMES HARDY VAUX.

_Newcastle, New South Wales, 17th September, 1815._




DEDICATION.

_To THOMAS THOMPSON, Esq., (Captain in His Majesty’s 46th regiment),
Commandant of Newcastle, in the Colony of New South Wales, and one of His
Majesty’s Justices of the Peace for that Territory._


SIR,

Having, in obedience to your commands, completed the following narrative
of my adventures I should deem myself wanting in gratitude, were I to
omit offering, at the same time that I respectfully submit my production
to your perusal, the humble tribute of my thanks, for the many favours I
have received at your hands; for the indulgent treatment I have generally
experienced; and more particularly for the distinguished honour you have
conferred on so unworthy an object as myself, in condescending to feel an
interest in the occurrences of my former life, and in permitting me to
inscribe to you, the following Memoirs of it.

I beg to assure you, Sir, that, however Fate or Fortune may hereafter
dispose of me, the remembrance of your goodness will never be effaced
from my mind; and that in the event of my past sufferings inducing you
to use your bountiful influence in my behalf, and to procure me once more
the probable means of attaining a respectable rank in society, my future
conduct shall be such, as to prove that you have not erred in believing
me radically reformed, and deserving the honour of your patronage.

In the sincere hope that these sheets will contribute to your
entertainment, and that of such friends as you may be pleased to
communicate them to,

                  I have the honour to subscribe myself,
                      with the most dutiful respect,

                                   SIR,

                                                 your obliged and grateful
                                                 humble servant,

                                                            JAMES H. VAUX.

_Newcastle, 30th March 1816._




MEMOIRS

OF

JAMES HARDY VAUX.




CHAPTER I.

    _Some Account of my Family.—My Birth and subsequent Adventures
    until I attained my ninth Year._


It may be expected that, like other biographers, I should give some
account of my ancestors. This I can but imperfectly do; for the
volatility of my disposition, and the early age at which I left my
friends, prevented me from ever making pointed inquiries on the
subject. Family pride I have ever considered as the most ridiculous
of all human weaknesses. However, as I am writing facts, be it known,
that my progenitors, by the mother’s side, were of no mean rank; my
great-great-grandmother, Dorothy, the daughter of Sir Thomas Hartopp,
Bart. of Ragby, or Ragley Castle, in ⸺shire, was united, after a long
and romantic courtship, to a gentleman named Yonge, and from this union
sprang a very respectable family, the Yonges of ⸺shire, who are still
of some consequence in that county. This scrap of genealogy I should
probably have been unacquainted with, but for the circumstance of two
original love-letters, interchanged between the parties above-mentioned,
during the period of their courtship, and still preserved in the family
as antiques. These epistles are written in the most pathetic strain,
and, allowing for the age in which they were composed, abound in elegant
diction. My grandmother, Dorothy Yonge, married Mr. Lowe, a respectable
attorney of the court of King’s-Bench, who for many years filled the
office of clerk to the warden of the Fleet, and had, besides, a very
extensive private practice. The only issue of this marriage was my
mother, who was brought up with the most affectionate tenderness, and
well educated. By what means she became acquainted with my father, who
was from a very distant county, I never learnt; but she was united to him
in the year 1781, and, as I have reason to think, against the advice and
will of her parents, my father being of a family much less respectable,
and, at the time of his marriage, in no higher situation than that of
butler and house-steward to Mr. Sumner, a member of parliament, whose
estate was situated near Guildford, in Surrey; where my mother, it
appears, went to reside after her union, of which I was the first fruits,
being born at the village of East Clandon, on the 20th of May, 1782. My
father shortly afterwards quitted the family of Mr. Sumner, and obtained
a similar post in the service of Sir Richard Hill, Bart., with whom he
continued several years.

In the year 1785, my grandfather, being advanced in life and naturally
fond of domestic retirement, quitted the profession to which, by his
integrity and honour, he had long been an ornament; and prevailing on
my parents to commit me to his care, removed with my grandmother to S⸺
in S⸺shire, I being then about three years of age. In this neat little
town, surrounded by the relatives of my grandmother, and many friends
of his own, my grandfather having served his clerkship in the county,
this worthy and truly virtuous couple enjoyed, for several years,
uninterrupted happiness, their only care being centred in the education
and indulgence of their grandson, of whom they every day became more
extravagantly fond.

As my years increased, I was transferred from the preparatory school, at
which I had been first placed, to a respectable seminary in the town,
one of the best the county afforded, where I received the rudiments of a
general education, and my capacity for learning endeared me still more
to my indulgent friends. The imprudence of my mother’s conduct had much
lessened her in the affectionate esteem of her parents; nor did her
subsequent behaviour, I believe, tend to restore her or recommend my
father to their good opinion; so that their correspondence grew every
year less frequent, and at length settled in a formal coldness on both
sides. What may appear more unnatural, though not uncommon, is, that in
proportion as the kindness and liberality of my grandparents towards me
increased, the affection of my father and mother diminished; and, as
they had several children afterwards, I soon became an object, if not of
aversion, at least of indifference. Of these children, two brothers and
a sister died in their infancy, and two sisters younger than myself are
still living.

Nothing worth record occurred during my continuance in S⸺shire. I passed
my hours of relaxation, like other children, in harmless sports, but
attended with avidity to my lessons when at school; and indeed as soon
as I was capable of understanding, my chief delight was in reading books
of an entertaining nature, from all of which I derived more or less
instruction. I even preferred this rational amusement to the childish
games of my young companions, from which my good friends prognosticated
that I should become a great man. I must confess that I was already a
spoiled child; but I did not abuse the indulgence I met with, by any
irregular or vicious conduct, nor did I betray any symptoms of latent
depravity, or indicate any wicked propensities. I hope my readers will
believe this assertion when I relate by what gradations I fell from the
path of rectitude, and when I account for the causes which actuated me to
pursue a course of dishonesty. My principal delight, when very young, was
to frequent the only bookseller’s shop our little town afforded, where I
would stand for hours reading, or rather devouring, whatever books, or,
as my dear grandfather termed it, mental food, I could lay hold of. There
was also an old woman who had a circulating library, consisting of about
a hundred volumes, chiefly novels, to whom I disbursed every sixpence
and shilling I received for pocket money. My parents, indeed (for by
this term I shall in future, for brevity’s sake, call my grandfather
and grandmother, as it is from them only I ever experienced parental
affection; they, I say) did not wholly approve of this indiscriminate
passion for reading; fearing, and indeed with reason, as I am now
convinced, that I should meet with matter tending to vitiate a young
mind (which has been justly compared to a sheet of white paper, open to
receive and retain the first impressions), and to inculcate romantic
notions of men and manners. Though I subscribe to the justice of this
idea in general, yet I firmly believe it was owing to this course of
reading that I very early acquired a knowledge of the world, surprising
in one so young; and that when I soon after launched into the ocean of
life, I was on my guard against many of the deceptions of the designing
part of mankind and enabled to avoid or defeat them. My beloved parents,
indeed, suspected not the errors to which I was becoming daily a stronger
proselyte. My grandfather, whom I believe to have been as perfect a
character and as good a Christian as nature ever formed, inculcated
both by precept and example, the love and practice of piety and virtue;
and, above all, an inflexible adherence to honesty. He possessed many
peculiarities of habit as well as principle, several of which I inherit
from him;—would to Heaven I inherited his virtues!

My volatile disposition was early manifested by my want of stability
or steady application to any particular employment or pursuit. Like
Robinson Crusoe, I felt a strong predilection for rambling into foreign
countries, and had a longing desire to go to sea. This arose from
perusing the Voyages of Cooke, Anson, and other circumnavigators; so
enraptured was I with their profession, that before I was twelve years
old I had a pretty just notion of nautical manœuvres, without having
ever seen a ship, and had most sea-terms at my tongue’s end. This rising
inclination was, however, checked for a time by the dissuasions of my
friends, who were alarmed at the bare thought of it, and by the inland
situation of the county we resided in. Among my domestic amusements I
practised drawing, for which I had a good natural genius; but happening
to be furnished with some prints of running horses for imitation,
and being a great admirer of that noble animal, I suddenly turned my
whole attention to this subject, in which I soon became a pretty good
proficient, considering my youth and that I never had any master, and it
appears to have been my _forte_. These prints having always the pedigree
and performances of the animal subjoined, insensibly gave me a passion
for racing, which became my next hobby-horse. I now eagerly perused
the _Racing Calendar_, took in the _Sporting Magazine_, purchased a
_Stud-Book_[2]; and was so indefatigable in my researches, that, before
I was fourteen, I could repeat the pedigree of any celebrated horse, and
could discourse of handicaps, and give-and-take plates, of the _Beacon
Course_, and the _Devil’s Ditch_[3], with the fluency of a veteran
jockey—and I actually stole a march from London to Newmarket in hopes of
obtaining a situation in the racing stables; flattering myself that I
might, like the great Dennis O’Kelly[4], whose life I had read, become
in time a shining character on the turf; but I failed in this attempt
to disgrace my friends, and degrade myself, as my youth and genteel
appearance deterred the persons to whom I applied from listening to my
request.

I shall now resume the thread of my narrative. After six years’
residence at S⸺, my grandfather was prevailed on, by the solicitations
of my father and mother, to return to London, and reside with them. My
father, from whom I probably derived my disposition to instability, had
by this time quitted the service of Sir Richard Hill, and established
himself in the hat and hosiery business in Great Turnstile, Holborn. How
this chimerical project occurred to him, I know not, as he certainly
had been bred to no trade; however, he was sanguine in his hopes of
success. He had taken a good house and shop, and on our arrival in town,
we found the family very comfortably established. I was introduced to my
two surviving sisters, who were pretty, lively girls, and my father and
mother received me with a shew of great affection.

I was now turned of nine years old, and shortly after our arrival, was
placed by my grandfather at a respectable boarding-school at Stockwell,
in Surrey, and my sisters were soon afterwards settled by their father
at one equally genteel at Oakingham, in Berkshire. As I shall not have
occasion to say much more of these girls, I shall now briefly observe
that they received a good female education, learning French and the other
fashionable accomplishments of the age. Their capacities were good; they
were both more than agreeable in their persons, and their dispositions
uncommonly sweet.




CHAPTER II.

    _I am taken from School and return to my Grandparents.—Remove
    to Cambridgeshire.—From thence again to London.—And a second
    time to S⸺shire.—Different Plans proposed for my settlement in
    life.—Friendship of the Moultrie Family.—Am sent to Liverpool
    on liking._


I continued at Stockwell nearly three years, during which time I acquired
a tolerable knowledge of the classics, and became as perfect in the
French language as I could do without residing in France. It was a custom
at this school to allow of no English being spoken, except in the hours
devoted to instruction, by which means our progress in French was much
facilitated. The scholars had free access to a well-selected library, by
which means I gratified my passion for reading, which increased with my
years. I was particularly fond of plays, and fancying I possessed some
talents for the stage, I actually formed the design, in conjunction with
a youth of good family, to elope from the school and join a company of
strollers, with the manager of whom he had formed an acquaintance in
London; but this hopeful scheme was frustrated by the young gentleman’s
sudden removal to the University. I was now taken from school, the
excessive fondness of my dear parents not being able to brook a longer
separation from me. I found these kind benefactors in private lodgings,
they having quitted my father’s house on account of family disagreements.
The latter had relinquished the hat business, by which he was _minus_
some hundreds of pounds; and after a short lapse of time, he embarked
in a very different trade, that of a tallow-chandler, of which he had
conceived favourable ideas: in this too, he failed of success, and was
equally unfortunate in several subsequent speculations, by which means
he considerably impoverished himself; however he continued to maintain
appearances with tolerable credit until his decease. I shall now take
leave of my father, mother, and sisters, for the present, their history
having no further connexion with my own life, as I never again became an
inmate of their family.

After a short residence in ⸺ square, my grandfather, on account of his
wife’s declining health, and with a view to economy in house-keeping,
that he might be more liberal in his bounty to myself, thought fit to
remove to Wisbeach in Cambridgeshire, where an old schoolfellow of his
resided, who had strongly pressed this measure. Here he took a neat
little house ready furnished, and placed me under the tuition of a
clergyman in the town, whose school I attended daily.

At the end of twelve months, we again returned to London, and soon
afterwards removed once more to S⸺shire, in the 14th year of my age.

I was most affectionately received by all my relations, and it was now
considered time to consult upon my future disposal. My kind grandfather,
who had been at so much care and expense in my education, had always
intended me for one of the liberal professions, and, as was most natural,
he would have preferred his own. I had a great uncle who had been a very
eminent surgeon and apothecary, in which business he was succeeded by his
son, who is still living in credit at S⸺. It was in contemplation to have
me articled to this gentleman, but I wished for a more active employment,
and should have preferred the army or navy. The dangers attending these
honourable professions, were however insuperable bars to the consent of
my fond parents.

At this juncture a most advantageous and unexpected offer of patronage
was extended in my behalf, which but for my unaccountable obstinacy,
would have been thankfully embraced; but my evil genius rendered abortive
a design, which bade fair to procure me an honourable rank in society.
The case was as follows: Within a mile of our little town resided John
Moultrie, Esq., whose father was governor of a British Settlement in
North America, and of whose name frequent mention is made in the history
of the ill-fated war with that country. By his attachment to the cause
of loyalty, this gentleman, as well as his son, suffered considerable
losses in their private property, for which in common with many others,
Governor Moultrie, on his return to England, received a liberal pecuniary
compensation from ministers. The old gentleman was at this period lately
deceased, and his son John succeeded to a large fortune, and a fine
estate and mansion-house called Aston, which his father had purchased
in the situation above described. He had married a very beautiful and
accomplished woman, born in America, by whom he had an only son about
my own age, who was like myself the darling of his parents. This youth
(named Austin) had been my early schoolfellow and playmate; and the
Moultrie family being in the habit of exchanging visits with most of
the respectable inhabitants of S⸺, among which class my relations were
numbered, I became known to them. As they perceived a growing attachment
between myself and the young Austin, and my manners pleased them, my
visits were encouraged, and I was almost a constant guest at Aston
Hall. By the circle of genteel persons of both sexes with whom I there
associated, my address was improved as well as my understanding. Young
Moultrie and myself became inseparable; we were constant companions in
the chase and other rural sports; and when the weather was unfavourable,
Mrs. Moultrie took delight in hearing me read her favourite authors, to
which she obliged her son to attend; and as I had rather the advantage
in mental acquirements, she was pleased to say that I contributed to his
improvement. In a word, I may truly assert that the happiest moments of
my life were spent in this amiable family.

At the period of which I am now writing, the parents of my young friend
had determined on settling him at the University of Oxford, in order to
complete his education: and the regret they felt at parting with their
beloved child, was scarcely more poignant than that of the latter, at his
approaching separation from me, so ardent was our juvenile friendship.
In this state of affairs, his father knowing my situation, and the
circumstances of my grandfather, who by his liberality towards me, had
much impaired his private fortune, which consisted at his retirement, of
but a few thousand pounds stock in the 3 per cent consols, a considerable
part of which he had sold out at a very disadvantageous rate, by reason
of the great depression in stocks at the commencement of the French war:
knowing all this, and that my settlement in life was at this moment
the subject of much perplexity, Mr. Moultrie, with a most unparalleled
generosity, offered to place me at college on the same terms with his
son, and at the end of three years, if he then withdrew the latter, to
take upon himself the charge of my future fortune. Here was an offer from
a gentleman of 2,000_l._ a year! I have always been of Shakspeare’s
opinion, that “There is a tide in the affairs of men,” _&c._, and that
most men have not only one, but several opportunities of attaining honour
and prosperity. I know this has been my own case, but my ill destiny has
hitherto rendered such chances unavailing. I have unhappily neglected
to “take the current while it served.” So, in the present instance,
having foolishly conceived, that to be immured within the walls of a
college for several years, would deprive me for so long a time of the
gratifications I expected, both of mind and body, on making my débût
on the stage of life, when I should be released from the constraint of
parental authority; the idea of losing so much valuable time, which I
fancied I could employ to much more advantage, induced me to protest in
strong terms against the measure proposed; and my too indulgent parents
at last gave way to my puerile remonstrances, and declined with the best
grace they could the kindness intended me. This impolitic step was much
censured by my other relations, particularly two maiden aunts, from whom
I had great pecuniary expectations; however it was soon after, consented
to by all parties, that I should be sent on trial, or as it is called,
on liking, to a respectable mercantile concern at Liverpool. The parties
were Messrs. Swan and Parker, very eminent linen-drapers, who besides
an extensive retail trade, exported very largely to the East and West
Indies, _&c._ A cousin of mine had been placed with these gentlemen a few
years before, but from ill health was obliged to return to his friends
at S⸺. His father, the junior Mr. Yonge I have before mentioned, had
paid one hundred guineas with him as a premium; and as the young man’s
indisposition prevented him from reaping the benefit of his engagement,
Messrs. Swan and Parker very handsomely consented to take me as an
apprentice without any fee, by way of remuneration to the family. My
grandfather indeed did not much relish the idea of a yard and a pair of
scissors; he had fondly hoped to see me profit by the education I had
received, in a very different line of life; but as I seconded the general
wish of my friends on this occasion, and much time had been already lost
in deliberation, all opposition ceased; and I accordingly set out well
equipped with all necessaries, by the stage coach for Liverpool, where,
on my arrival, I was kindly received by my new masters: and the next
day instructed in the nature of my duty, and the economy and rules of
the house. Having now brought the reader to an epoch in my life, which
promised considerable advantage to my future prospects, I shall put an
end to the second Chapter.




CHAPTER III.

    _My Employment in my new Situation.—Seduced by an Apprentice
    in the House to neglect my Business, and keep irregular
    Hours.—Become a Frequenter of the Cockpit.—Repeated Losses at
    this Place induce me to recruit my Finances by embezzling my
    Employers’ Money.—Remonstrances on my Misconduct producing no
    effect, am seriously admonished, and sent back to my Friends._


I was, now turned of fourteen; my health and constitution good, my
spirits elevated, and I felt all those pleasing sensations, which
naturally arise in a youthful mind, happy in conscious innocence, and
flattered by the prospect of rising to honourable independence. The
gaiety and bustle of this beautiful and improving borough at once charmed
and amused me; I spent a week in viewing the public buildings, the
environs, _&c._; but above all, my admiration was excited by the numerous
and capacious docks, by which ships of large burden are admitted, as it
were, into the heart of the town, and discharge their rich and varied
cargoes with surprising facility, which are deposited in spacious
warehouses, of amazing extent, and from twelve to fourteen stories high,
with which these noble docks are nearly surrounded.

The opportunities I had, during my residence in Liverpool, of viewing
the daily arrivals and sailings of merchant-ships to and from all parts
of the world, particularly the Guineamen, which formed a remarkably fine
class of vessels[5], revived the latent desire I had for a sea-faring
life; and I wanted but little incitement, had the smallest opportunity
offered, to take French leave of my masters, and gratify my rambling
propensity. However, the bustle in which I was continually involved,
and the new scenes of amusement which every succeeding day presented,
suppressed the inclination for a time; but that it was not totally
subdued, will be seen hereafter.

The establishment and economy of our house were upon the most regular
plan; the former consisted of six apprentices, (including myself,)
and four assistants at very liberal stipends, besides a nephew of the
elder partner, who superintended the whole, and officiated in the
compting-house: there were also several porters, and other subordinates,
for all of whom full employment was found. Being the junior apprentice,
it was my province to polish the counters, trim the lamps, carry out
small parcels, and to perform other inferior duties; when disengaged
from which, I assisted in waiting on the retail customers, and making
myself otherwise useful behind the counter. We had a plentiful table
appropriated for us, to which we retired in turn during the hours of
business; commodious and airy chambers; and, in short, enjoyed every
comfort we could desire.

For the first month of my probation, I behaved extremely well, and by my
quickness and assiduity, gained the good opinion of my employers, who
wrote of me in the most favourable terms to my friends in S⸺shire; nor
did my expenses exceed my allowance for pocket-money, which was fully
adequate to every rational enjoyment.

Among my fellow apprentices, was a young man named King, some years
older than myself, with whom, from a similarity of sentiments, I formed
a close intimacy. He was of an excellent disposition, but a great lover
of pleasure; and as his servitude was far advanced, and his prospects
peculiarly flattering, he was under very little restraint, but gave the
rein to his passion for dissipation. His expenses were profuse, but
whether he indulged in them at the expense of his probity, I could never
ascertain. He soon introduced me to several young men of his own stamp,
and I became in a short time as great a rake as the best of them: nor
was our conversation confined to our own sex; scarcely a night passing
without our visiting one or other of those houses consecrated to the
Cyprian goddess, with which the town of Liverpool abounds. In such a
course of life, it is not likely that I could submit to limited hours;
my companion and I seldom returned home before midnight, and sometimes
not till the ensuing morning. Though we took measures to keep this from
the ears of our employers, it could not fail to be known in time; and
the consequence was, a strong but tender remonstrance on my imprudence,
which much affected me at the moment; but the impression was transitory,
and soon effaced. I plunged deeper and deeper in the vortex of folly
and dissipation, until I was obliged to have recourse for advice to the
Æsculapius of Gilead-house.

This irregular mode of life had borne hard on my finances, but I had not,
as yet, had recourse to fraud or peculation. I was liberally supplied
by my relations, on leaving S⸺, and had received my first quarterly
allowance; but an event, which soon followed, tempted me to the first
breach of confidence and integrity.

I had in my youth been passionately fond of Cocking, a sport for which
the county of S⸺ has been always famed; and though so young, I had
constantly kept several cocks at walk, unknown to my parents; so that
I had acquired a considerable share of experience and knowledge on the
subject. One day, when I was sent with some muslins to wait on a lady
in the environs of Liverpool, near the Canal, I accidentally passed a
cockpit, where a great crowd was assembled; and I understood that a
grand Main was about to commence. Elated at this pleasing intelligence,
I hastened to execute my commission; and returning to the house, entered
it, and leaving my wrapper of goods in care of the landlady, I ascended
to the pit, and took my seat. The company was, as usual, of a motley
description, but there were many genteel persons. I ventured a few
trifling bets at first with various success; but at length an opportunity
offering, which I considered as next to a certainty, I laid the odds
to a large amount, flattering myself that by this stroke of judgment,
I should be enabled to figure away with increased eclat among my gay
companions. After I had so done, greater odds were still vociferated, but
in a moment the scene was changed! the fallen cock, in the agonies of
death, made a desperate effort, and rising for a moment, cut the throat
of his antagonist, who was standing over him, in the act of crowing with
exultation on his victory! The latter immediately fell, choked with the
effusion of blood, nor did the victor survive him many moments. The whole
pit resounded with acclamations, and the discord which ensued beggars
description. I was not the only sufferer by this revolution of fortune;
many others had laid higher odds than myself, and to a much greater
amount. I was soon surrounded by my creditors, to whom I disbursed
every shilling I had about me, among which were some pounds I had
just received from the lady for goods, and for which I had given her a
receipt. I was still something deficient, for which I pledged my honour
to one of the parties, giving my address, and promising payment on an
early day. I now returned home, filled with remorse and shame; but as the
first false step of a young person insensibly leads to another, I added
to my guilt by concealing the affair from my employers, and directed
them to book the articles the lady had selected. I had a degree of false
shame about me, which rendered me incapable of confessing the truth and
promising amendment, or all might still have been well. In the evening
I had recourse to the bottle to drown my chagrin; and I determined to
purloin a certain sum every day, in the course of my attendance on retail
customers until I had liquidated my debt of honour! Then, I vowed to stop
and reform. Delusive idea! how little did I then know my own weakness,
or the futility of such resolutions in a young mind! And who, that once
begins a career of vice, can say to himself, “Thus far will I go, and no
farther?” After I had discharged my engagement, I found a small sum must
be raised for pocket-money, and other exigencies, as it would be above
two months before I could expect a remittance.

I therefore continued my peculation, and at length my evil genius
suggested to me, that I might, by venturing a small sum, become more
fortunate at the cockpit, and repair the loss I had sustained; as
miracles don’t happen every day, and the odds must win in the long run.
Thus I argued with myself; and, fatally for me, I tried the experiment.

From this moment I never missed a day’s fighting at the cockpit; and when
sent on business which required my speedy return, I could not tear myself
from the spot, but frequently staid out several hours, and afterwards
forged a lie to account for my delay. I sometimes came off a winner,
but as I was not then acquainted with the art of hedging, by which the
knowing ones commonly save themselves, I was sure to be a loser at every
week’s end.

I managed matters so well, indeed, that my frequent secretions from the
till, were not discovered, however they might be suspected. The extensive
trade of the shop rendered it next to impossible; and what I abstracted,
was a trifle compared to the gross receipts of the day.

My continued misconduct became now the subject of frequent remonstrances
on the part of Mr. Parker the resident partner; which not having the
desired effect, that gentleman wrote to my friends, informing them in
general terms, that I had unhappily formed improper connexions, and
that my late levity of conduct rendered me unfit to be received into
their house; therefore, desiring I might be recalled without delay. Mr.
Parker concluded with a remark, which I shall never forget, and which
was peculiarly gratifying to my grandfather’s (perhaps too partial)
feelings: after expatiating on my general capacity for business, he added
“his smartness and activity are really wonderful.” This letter produced
a speedy answer, in consequence of which, I was directed to hasten my
departure, which took place in a few days, Mr. Parker giving me a great
deal of wholesome advice at parting; observing that although it was not
in his power to charge me with any direct criminality, my inconsiderate
behaviour, and the continued excesses of my conduct, left but too much
room for unfavourable conjectures.

Behold me now returned to my grandfather, after an absence of nearly five
months; and this excursion may be called my first entrance into life. I
could not help blushing at the consciousness of my own unworthiness; but
the blind partiality of my dear parents, induced them to believe me less
culpable than I really was; and to listen readily to any thing I had to
offer in palliation of my errors.




CHAPTER IV.

    _I prevail on my Grandfather to let me visit London.—Am
    provided with Letters of Recommendation.—Received into the
    Office of a respectable Attorney, my Kinsman.—Quit that
    Employment, and engage with a wholesale Stationer.—Obtain
    Clothes, &c., on credit, without any intention of paying for
    them.—Bilk my Lodgings repeatedly.—Return to the Law.—Obliged
    to live by my Wits.—Become a Hackney Writer.—Resort nightly to
    the Blue Lion._


Shortly after my return from Liverpool, finding the narrow limits of
a small market-town too circumscribed for my active disposition; and
nothing having been determined on, as to my future disposal, I entreated
my parents to let me go to London, which I had always considered as the
grand field for talents of every description; and where I doubted not of
forwarding myself, by the exercise of those I possessed. They at length
consented, and after the necessary preparations, I set out, receiving
the blessings and prayers of these indulgent benefactors, and moderately
supplied with money for my reasonable necessities.

My grandfather had of course many acquaintances in London, of his
own profession, to several of whom he furnished me with letters of
recommendation; it being his wish, that I should by a few months’
practice in a law office, ascertain how far I was disposed to be articled
for the usual period, necessary to procure my admission. I had always
been prepossessed in favour of this profession, which I knew from my
reading and experience, to abound in variety, and, if I may be allowed
the phrase, in pleasing perplexity.

On my arrival in town, I waited first on a relation of our family, Mr.
P⸺, a young man lately established in the profession, and received as a
partner by Mr. M⸺, a gentleman of large fortune, and extensive practice,
who would, it was probable, in a few years’ time, retire from business in
favour of my cousin.

The latter received me very kindly, and without hesitation, offered to
employ me (with his partner’s concurrence) as copying clerk, at a weekly
salary, which to a youth like me, was of course but small.

As I conceived this offer too advantageous to be rejected, I thankfully
embraced it, and immediately entered on my function in Lincoln’s-Inn New
Square.

As I had no motives of affection to attract me to my father’s house, I
determined on becoming master of my own conduct; and accordingly took
a neat private lodging, and regulated my mode of life conformably to
the state of my finances. I breakfasted at home, dined at a tavern or
genteel eating-house, and in the evening took my tea and read the papers
at a coffee-house: after which I sometimes passed the night in reading at
home, but most commonly went to one of the theatres at half-price, where
I gratified my violent passion for the drama, which at once improved my
understanding and amused my mind.

This course of life, though it rapidly weakened my purse, was rational,
compared to that which I soon after led, and I might have supported it
with credit, by the indulgence of my friends, for a considerable time. As
the business of our office was of a various nature, I soon gained great
experience in the different branches of common law, and conveyancing: I
became by practice, an expert and correct copyist; and I delighted much
in studying the most approved law books, reading reports of cases, _&c._
I became familiar with _Burn’s Justice_, and soon gained a pretty correct
knowledge of the criminal law, and of those minute points, of which an
able counsel or attorney can avail himself, in order to rescue a client
from the claws of justice, howsoever glaring and palpable his guilt may
be. Such is the glorious uncertainty of the English law! Little did I
then conceive how useful this knowledge might one day prove to myself;
of which more hereafter. I merely pursued this intricate study by way of
exercising my ingenuity and gratifying my curiosity.

I must here inform the reader, that these various pursuits and studies
were not confined to the short term of my continuance in the employ of
which I am now writing. After I quitted the office of Messrs. M⸺ and P⸺,
and during the course of a wild and dissipated life, they formed one of
my favourite domestic amusements; as did in fact reading in general: and
throughout the most profligate stages of my future career, which I shall
hereafter narrate, a portion of my time was always devoted to the perusal
of books, and a part of my money, however hardly or dishonestly obtained,
to the purchase of them: and to this moment I still consider them the
most valuable property a man of my disposition can possess.

About three months after my arrival in town, I began to grow less regular
in my manner of life; my expenses increased; and I became negligent of
the office hours. I had contracted an intimacy with several young persons
of both sexes, which unavoidably engaged me in a course of expensive
dissipation, to which my means were inadequate. Though I occasionally
derived small supplies from my grandfather, yet as he had no idea of
the extent of my expenditure, they were comparatively trifling. Mr. P⸺
finding I was not to be reclaimed by advice, and having no authority
to use any other means, at length for the credit of his office, and for
fear I should contaminate the other clerks, gave me a formal, though
civil dismissal, which I received without surprise, as I knew I had long
deserved it.

I was now tired of the law, or rather of the restraint I was under, in an
office of that description; but still I found it necessary to have some
employment, as well to amuse me, as to contribute to my support.

I therefore engaged myself as assistant in the warehouse of Messrs.
Key and Sons, wholesale stationers in Abchurch-lane, Lombard-street,
at a weekly salary of one guinea; which was more by half than I had
received from my last employers, and equal to the pay of an experienced
clerk in an attorney’s office at that time of day. This situation I
obtained through the interest of one of my fellow-rakes, the son of a
substantial citizen, who roundly vouched for my integrity and diligent
conduct. My employment here was to superintend the packing of goods for
exportation and home consumption; to write invoices; copy letters; ship
goods at the Custom-house, _&c._ I continued, however, but a short time
in this situation; confinement to the east end of the town prevented my
associating with my old acquaintances, who chiefly dwelt in the environs
of Covent-garden, or the purlieus of Drury-lane.

During an abode of ten months in London, as I was frequently pushed
for money, I availed myself of a genteel appearance, and pretty good
address, and taking advantage of the credulity of several tradesmen
in the neighbourhood, I ordered wearing apparel of various kinds, and
sometimes other goods, upon credit, without much concern about the day
of payment; however I always took care to procure a bill of parcels with
the articles, which precluded any charge of fraud, and left the matter
at the worst but a debt contracted; for which, being a minor, I knew I
could not be arrested. This was my first deviation from honesty, since
I left Liverpool. I was also frequently obliged to change my lodgings;
and, as payment of my rent would have required ready money, for which I
had so many other uses, I commonly decamped under favour of the night,
having previously removed my effects by various stratagems. As I was
ashamed to let my grandfather know the true state of my affairs, and
as I really grieved at the expenses I had already caused him, which I
knew had much inconvenienced him, I forbore at last, to trouble him for
remittances; but falsely assured him that I was doing well, and enabled
to live upon the profits of my industry. I desired he would abandon the
idea of articling me to the law, as the expenses attending admission had
of late years been so much increased by stamp duties; and as I could, if
I continued the study, at a future period, practise under the sanction of
another person’s name; a custom then very prevalent, though irregular.
By these assurances I quieted the good old man, and silenced any
inquiries my friends might have instituted respecting me; as I now really
wished to continue free from all restraint upon my person or actions, and
foolishly flattered myself that I should by some lucky event, ultimately
secure the means of independence. These conjectures were, however,
perfectly vague, and proceeding from no fixed idea whatever.

On quitting my city employment, I returned to the law, for which I still
retained a partiality; and obtained a more liberal salary than before in
an office equally respectable. Indeed I was now become more useful, and
had improved much both in person and address since my arrival in town.

I was still frequently reduced to pecuniary straits, and obliged to have
recourse to various expedients, known only to men of the town, for my
support: some of them indeed were bordering on dishonesty, and none of
them very honourable. But to describe them individually, is impossible,
and a man _who lives by his wits_, as the phrase is, will assure you, if
called to account, that he really could not for his life, tell by what
distinct means he makes out a living.

As I now wrote uncommonly fast, I quitted the station of a weekly clerk,
and obtained writings to copy by the sheet, from the law stationers, by
which I could earn considerably more money; and in this employment I
continued to labour diligently for several hours every day, and sometimes
half the night.

When I had a mind to relax from this occupation, and particularly if my
finances were at a low ebb, I frequently resorted to the Blue Lion, in
Gray’s-Inn-Lane, a house noted for selling fine ale, and crowded every
night with a motley assemblage of visiters, among whom were many thieves,
sharpers and other desperate characters, with their doxies. I was
introduced to this house (from which hundreds of young persons may date
their ruin) by a fellow-clerk, who appeared to have a personal intimacy
with most of these obnoxious persons; however, though I listened eagerly
to their conversation, (part of which was then unintelligible to me),
and fancied them people of uncommon spirit, I was not yet sufficiently
depraved to cultivate their acquaintance; but sat with a pipe in my
mouth, enveloped in smoke, ruminating like a philosopher on the various
characters who tread the great stage of life, and felt a sort of secret
presentiment, that I was myself born to undergo a more than common share
of vicissitudes and disappointments. How far these ideas were well
grounded, the reader will judge when he has perused this narrative, of
which I shall here close the fourth Chapter.




CHAPTER V.

    _The Trip to Portsmouth._


During my nightly resorts to the Blue Lion, in Gray’s-Inn-Lane, I one
evening fell into conversation, at that house, with a young man of decent
appearance, a few years older than myself. We were so mutually pleased
with each other, that at parting, an appointment to breakfast together
the next morning was the consequence, and on this second meeting, our
intimacy so far increased, that we began to explain our respective
situations in life to each other. My new acquaintance, whose name was
D⸺, informed me that he had lately quitted His Majesty’s Ship Montague,
of 74 guns, on board of which he had served as Steward to the Commander,
Captain Patterson. That having lived freely for some months on shore,
he had now spent all his money, and was so much reduced, that he really
knew not how to subsist any longer, and concluded with expressing his
intention to proceed immediately to Portsmouth, in the hope of obtaining
a similar birth to his former one. I assured him that I was, like
himself, so much reduced, as to find the utmost difficulty in existing
at all, and that if he would permit me to join my fortune to his, I
should without hesitation feel happy in the opportunity of accompanying
him to Portsmouth in quest of some employment. He declared that nothing
would afford him greater pleasure, and it was agreed that we should,
each of us without delay, convert our spare apparel, _&c._, into cash,
and set out the very next day. I accordingly lost no time in the needful
preparations, and having bilked my landlord, with whom I was some few
weeks in arrears, I met D⸺, the same evening, and after indulging in a
farewell cruize, which sensibly diminished our slender finances, we took
a few hours’ repose, and at eight o’clock the next morning, commenced our
peregrination.

On a comparison of our personal effects, it appeared that we possessed
between us about twenty shillings in money, and had each a spare shirt,
neck-cloth and hose, in a bundle, which (traveller-like) we carried
across our shoulders on a good oak-stick. We were both decently clad,
in good health, and in high spirits notwithstanding our poverty. We
agreed that to save expenses, we should perform the journey on foot,
(being seventy-two miles) and we calculated that with frugality, we
should be enabled to defray the contingent charges for diet and lodging
on the road. It soon appeared, however, that though good economists in
theory, we were not so in practice; for as we both loved good cheer, and
the severity of the weather required a suitable fortification, we had
expended half our stock by the time we got to Kingston, our first stage,
and only twelve miles from town. Here we put up at a public-house, called
The Eight Bells, and having enjoyed a good dinner, which was succeeded
by some excellent mulled elder wine of the landlady’s own composition,
and which was peculiarly adapted to the season of the year, we liked our
quarters so well that we spent not only the night, but half the next day
in the enjoyments of repose, eating, drinking, and smoking, before it
occurred to either of us that every item of those said enjoyments was
recorded in chalk by the hostess, and would inevitably be consolidated
in the shape of a bill, which we must discharge before a clearance could
be obtained for the next port. Having at length recollected ourselves,
and called “to pay,” our reckoning amounted to three or four shillings
more than we possessed in our common purse. As it was impossible to think
of proceeding any farther without recruiting, we were now in no small
consternation. Bilking the landlady was out of the question, for we had
given our bundles into her charge on first entering the house, and their
contents were not only indispensably necessary to us, but also worth more
than the sum required to release them. In this dilemma, a sudden thought
struck me. Calling for pen, ink, and paper, I told my companion I had a
scheme in my head for raising a supply, but would not impart it until I
had tried its success. I then drew up a sort of Memorial to the following
effect: “To the Ladies and Gentlemen of Kingston.—The writer hereof, a
young man of respectable family, and good education, having by a series
of misfortunes, been reduced to the greatest distress, is now on his
way to Portsmouth, in hopes of procuring a situation in the navy; but
being destitute of money for his present support, humbly solicits your
charitable assistance towards enabling him to pursue his journey. To a
noble mind, the pleasure of doing a good action is its own reward. The
smallest donations will be gratefully received, and any lady or gentleman
inclined to relieve the writer is earnestly requested to subscribe his
or her name hereto.”—Having completed this production, I desired my
friend to wait patiently for my return, and assured him I doubted not of
bringing speedy relief. I now set out on my expedition, and immediately
waited on Mr. Mayor, who was a grocer, but in this first essay I was
unsuccessful. His worship declared he never encouraged applications of
this sort from strangers; and desired me to go about my business. I,
however, took the liberty of subscribing his name to my memorial, by
way of sanction, and gave his charity credit for a donation of five
shillings. Young as I was at that time, I well knew that example, in
matters of this kind, goes a great way; and that many persons, without a
grain of christian benevolence in their composition, will give liberally
from motives of ostentation, when they see that their neighbours have
already contributed, and that their own names and donations will also be
made public. I experienced the truth of this notion, for I was successful
in almost every application I afterwards made. Having visited a number of
genteel houses, with various success, I was on the point of returning,
to impart my good luck to my companion, when coming to a very handsome
mansion-house in the suburbs of the town, I thought I ought not to
omit calling, and a person at that moment passing by, I inquired whose
residence it was, and which was the entrance to the premises; for the
house was situated in the midst of a spacious pleasure-ground, remote
from the high road, and it being quite dusk, I had not observed any
avenue by which I could gain access to it. I was informed that it was
the residence of Lady W⸺, that a little further on, I should perceive a
door in the brick wall, which extended along the road-side, and that if
I entered at that door, and proceeded in a strait direction, I should
arrive at the servants’ hall; but my informer cautioned me to keep close
to another wall on my left hand, which divided this avenue from the lawn
in front of the mansion, because there was a very large and fierce dog
at the upper end, but which, being chained up, could not reach me, if
I followed the above directions. I thanked this obliging person, and
immediately proceeded to the door described, which I entered, and walked
cautiously, and not without some fear, by the wall-side, till I perceived
by the lights in the kitchen, and out-offices, that I was near the
premises.

It was now very dark, and I was carefully exploring my way, my mind
full of apprehensions at the thought of this terrible dog; when lo! at
that instant, to my inexpressible consternation, the ferocious animal
made a spring at me, and I gave myself up for dead. However, though he
was certainly within a yard of me, he did me no mischief, but my alarm
was so great, that without knowing how, or where to fly for refuge, I
ran precipitately from the spot, and when I recovered from the fright,
found myself in the pleasure-ground in front of the mansion-house. It
appeared that I had, without knowing, escaped through a door in the wall,
which was open on my left hand at the moment I was alarmed by the dog.
I was now more at a loss than ever, for I knew of no way to get out of
the pleasure-ground, except by the aforesaid door, and fear of the dog
prevented my attempting that passage. After wandering about for a few
minutes, I approached the mansion, and going up to one of the parlour
windows, which were very large, and on a level with the terrace before
the house, I applied my eye to the glass, and discovered through an
aperture in the inside shutters, a numerous and splendid party of ladies
and gentlemen at dinner. Having considered a moment, I determined on a
very bold step, as I saw no alternative but remaining all night in the
open air, exposed to the inclemency of the weather. Taking advantage of
a pause in the company’s conversation, I tapped with my finger at the
window, and immediately the whole party were struck with wonder. In the
midst of their surprise I repeated my knock, and then, after several
voices exclaiming, “Good God! there is certainly somebody at the window,”
_&c._, a gentleman rose from the table, and advancing towards me, opened
first the shutters, and then the window itself, which might, in fact, be
called a pair of folding doors, and these being thrown back, I walked
in with the most respectful air I could assume, and presented myself to
the astonished company. Having bowed twice or thrice, and given time for
their alarm to subside, I began to make my speech.

Apologizing for my presumptuous intrusion, I stated in a concise manner,
the fright I had endured, from the dog, my embarrassment at not being
able to find means of egress from the pleasure-ground, and my having
consequently taken the liberty of knocking at the window. I then
presented my memorial, which was read in turn by most of the company,
each of whom surveyed me with evident surprise. Having answered such
queries as they thought proper to put to me, I was desired by the lady
of the house to withdraw to the kitchen for a short time, and a servant
was ordered to attend me thither. Here I had my story to repeat for the
information of the domestics, who laughed heartily at the adventure of
the dog, but afterwards seriously assured me, that had the animal not
been chained, or had I approached within his reach, he would inevitably
have torn me to pieces. The parlour dinner being over, and the dishes
brought out, I was desired to fall to, and being really hungry I wanted
no pressing, but selected from the variety of good things on the table a
very fine buttock of beef, on which substantial fare I made a sumptuous
meal. There was no scarcity of good malt liquor, and Lady W⸺ very kindly
sent me out a pint of red port, with a particular injunction (which
by-the-by was unnecessary,) that I should eat and drink heartily.

At length I was summoned to attend the company in the parlour, and her
ladyship then expressing her concern for my misfortunes, and her anxious
hope that I should speedily find an end to them, presented me with
half-a-guinea. The rest of the party also said many handsome things,
and the majority of them contributed to my relief. In addition to these
favours, one of the gentlemen, at the particular request of Lady W⸺,
took the trouble to write a letter in my behalf to the captain of a
man-of-war, supposed to be then lying at Portsmouth, entreating him to
give me an appointment under him. Her Ladyship, after obliging me to
take another glass of wine, and repeating her sorrow for my distress,
advised me to lose no time in prosecuting my journey, ordered a servant
to conduct me to the door at which I had first entered her premises, and
I took a respectful leave of this truly benevolent party.

Returning to the Eight Bells, I imparted my adventures to my friend, who
was, of course, much pleased at my success, for I had realized between
four and five pounds. I found this begging scheme so productive, that
I was in no hurry to pursue the Portsmouth speculation, and as we were
both satisfied with our present quarters, it was agreed that we should
continue a few days longer in Kingston, in which time I proposed to
follow up my success by making a regular circuit among the inhabitants;
and I, in fact, determined to levy similar contributions in every town
which lay in our route.

It is to be observed, that this idea of raising money was perfectly
original in me, for at that time I had never heard of such a practice,
but have since discovered that it is a very common expedient, and is
called by those persons who live by such impositions, “_the Letter
Racket_.”

The following day I again sallied forth, and met with equal success,
visiting not only the houses of private persons, but even the respectable
shopkeepers, _&c._; and I may here state, once for all, that in the
course of this, as well as my subsequent speculations of the same
nature, I met with various receptions, according to the charitable or
churlish dispositions of the people to whom I applied. Many pitied my
case and cheerfully relieved me. Others expressed equal commiseration,
but declined giving any thing, either because “they never encouraged
beggars,” or “they had poor enough of their own to maintain.” Some
invited me into their parlours, treated me with excessive politeness, and
obliged me to take refreshment at their own tables; and where there were
any young ladies in the family, I was an object of particular solicitude,
and the recital of my misfortunes drew many a sigh from their tender
bosoms. Others desired me, like the Mayor of Kingston, to go about my
business, and hinted that I ought to be sent to the house of correction
as a vagrant. Sometimes the servants who admitted me refused to present
my memorial, declaring they had strict orders from their masters or
mistresses never to trouble them on such an occasion. The donations I
commonly received, were from one shilling to five; sometimes, but rarely,
I was presented with gold, particularly at the seats of the nobility
and gentry, all which, laying within a short distance of the road I
travelled, I made a point of calling at; and for my information on this
subject, I provided myself with a comprehensive book of roads, in which
those objects are correctly laid down. Some truly charitable persons, but
whose means were limited, relieved me with sixpence, and of course I was
bound to accept such a trifle with as much appearance of thankfulness,
as I would a larger sum; and frequently when I called at a farm house by
the road-side, I have been compelled to take some cold meat, or other
eatables, which I afterwards bestowed upon the first more needy beggar
I met on my way. It was my custom in general, to travel on foot, making
short stages, and putting up at a good inn in every town I entered, where
I lived upon the best during my stay, and associated with London riders,
and other respectable guests. When tired of walking, I availed myself of
a passing stage-coach, or return post-chaise, and my only equipage was a
spare shirt, handkerchief, _&c._, which, with my book of roads, I carried
in a small bundle under my arm.

To resume my narrative, I returned from my second day’s excursion about
dusk in the evening, and entering the Eight Bells, was surprised at not
finding my companion within. On inquiring of the landlady, the good woman
informed me, with some degree of terror, that two of the town constables
had been in search of me; and kindly exhorted me, if I was conscious
of having done wrong, to make the best of my way from Kingston, as she
expected them to call again every minute, adding that she believed my
friend was gone out in quest of me. I smiled at the landlady’s fears,
and thanking her for her friendly advice, assured her I was unconscious
of any crime, and should willingly face the officers, come when they
might. I then desired to have some tea, which she set about preparing,
during which interval my fellow-traveller came in. I briefly concerted
with him the part we should respectively act, in case of our being called
upon to give an account of ourselves, though I had no conception on
what grounds I was to be apprehended. We now proceeded to take our tea,
but before we had half finished it, the constables entered the room,
and informed me they had orders to carry me before the magistrates, who
were then assembled in the town-hall; and that the young man, who they
understood to be my comrade, must also accompany me. I answered, I would
with pleasure attend them, but requested time to finish our repast, which
they consented to allow us; and we then proceeded all together to the
town-hall, the officers carrying our two bundles, which they had obtained
from the landlady by order of the justices. Being brought before the
bench, I immediately recognised among the persons in attendance, one of
the gentlemen I had seen at Lady W⸺’s dinner party, and the very same who
had written the letter of recommendation to Captain ⸺. This gentleman now
stated to the magistrates the circumstance of my coming to Lady W⸺’s
house the preceding evening, the extraordinary manner in which I had made
my appearance, and the reception I met with; and farther stated, that the
ensuing morning, it was discovered that a part of the fence enclosing the
pleasure-ground had been broken, and other damage done on the premises,
which led to a suspicion that I might be an impostor, who had a design to
rob the house, or do some other mischief, and that he, therefore, on the
part of Lady W⸺, wished me to be examined by their worships, and obliged
to give some further account of myself.

Though the suspicions of Lady W. and her friends appeared to have been
very weakly founded, and their idea to be utterly extravagant, the
justices entered seriously into the spirit of the business, and ordering
us to be set apart from each other, proceeded to interrogate us strictly
as to our professions, business in Kingston, the objects of our journey,
_&c._ I, for my part, adhered to the story I had before framed, which it
is needless to repeat to the reader, being devoid of interest, and as it
was for the most part utterly false, I cannot now minutely recollect it.
My companion’s account of himself was nearer the truth. He stated that
he had been an officer’s servant in the navy, and was now on his way
to Portsmouth in quest of a similar situation, but denied any further
knowledge of me than joining me by accident on the road, and as I was
bound to the same place, we had agreed to keep each other company.
Our bundles being next inspected, were found to contain nothing of a
suspicious nature, except a number of pawnbrokers’ duplicates, and these
we respectively accounted for as relating to wearing apparel, _&c._,
which our pecuniary distress had obliged us to pledge. This part of the
story was indeed strictly true, and in my case corroborated, and gave
an air of probability to my account. Nothing appearing to warrant the
detention of my companion, he was discharged, but with a positive order
to quit the town instantly. As to myself, having mentioned, in answer to
a query from one of the magistrates, the name of a certain gentleman, in
London, who knew me and my family, his worship declared he was himself
intimately acquainted with that gentleman, and as he was going to town
the next day, he should make a point of referring to him as to the truth
of my assertion. He therefore ordered a constable to detain me in custody
until his return from London. I was accordingly confined in the officer’s
house, where I had every necessary accommodation, for the expenses of
which the magistrate himself very kindly became accountable. My companion
visited me the same evening, prior to his departure, and I divided with
him the money I had acquired. It was his intention to proceed direct to
Portsmouth, and I promised, as soon as I was liberated to follow him,
taking a direction whereby to find him on my arrival.

The ensuing evening the magistrate returned from town, and immediately
sent for me to his own house. Being brought before his worship, who was
a brewer, named Sidebottom, I found him seated, not on the chair of
justice, but on a stool in his accompting-house. The old gentleman began
by remarking with some severity, on the impropriety and turpitude of my
conduct, in withdrawing myself from the protection of my respectable
friends, and traversing the country under such debasing circumstances.
He said he had understood from his friend Mr. Howell, that my relations
were both able and willing to take care of my fortunes. After a long
expostulation to the same effect, his worship continued: “Perhaps
you are not aware that it is in my power to commit you to bridewell
for a month for begging without a pass.” Then raising his voice and
brandishing his pen, he exclaimed with a very pompous air, “Young man,
I shall certainly⸺discharge you.” The two latter words relieved me from
a momentary anxiety; for when his worship paused, I certainly expected
he would add “commit you.” He proceeded, “but, on the express condition
that you immediately quit this town, and return to your friends. If you
are found hereabouts after this night, expect to be severely dealt with.”
I gladly accepted these terms, and assuring the old gentleman of my
compliance, took a respectful leave, his worship giving me a little more
wholesome advice, and generously presenting me with half-a-crown, as he
said, to carry me to London.

Being now discharged, I repaired to the Eight Bells, where I settled with
my landlady, and learnt from her that my companion had left Kingston the
preceding night at a late hour, by the Portsmouth coach. I slept this
night at the Eight Bells, and the next morning returned to London, where
on my arrival I found myself in possession of above five pounds, after
all the impediments I had met with.

As I made a point of keeping my word with my late fellow-traveller, I
determined on having one jovial evening in town, and resuming my journey
the next day, by the same route as before, notwithstanding Justice
Sidebottom’s prohibition. As to presenting myself to Mr. Howell, or going
near any of my friends, nothing was more foreign to my thoughts.

The following morning, I accordingly set out on my second expedition by
the Kingston stage, and arriving at that town, took up my lodging at a
public-house in the suburbs. Notwithstanding the check I had before met
with, I was so hardy as to stop three days in Kingston, during which I
levied contributions on most of the inhabitants, taking care to avoid
that part of the town I had before visited, and I was so lucky as to
meet with no interruption to my success. From Kingston I proceeded
to Guildford, taking in my way, Cobham, Ripley, and the intervening
villages; from Guildford to Godalming, thence to Liphook, where I
altered my course, and took a circuitous route by the way of Chichester,
to Portsmouth. This journey occupied about a fortnight, and arriving
at Portsmouth, I soon found my late companion, D⸺, who was lodged at
the house of an acquaintance, and not having yet obtained a birth on
ship-board, had engaged himself as an occasional clerk and assistant to
a tradesman in the town. I myself hired a small apartment in St. Mary’s
street, intending to remain a week or two in Portsmouth, where I had
never before been, and to enjoy such amusements as the place afforded,
as long as my money lasted. As my friend D⸺ appeared to have dropped the
idea of going on ship-board, I became also careless on that subject,
particularly as the motive which gave rise to that design (namely,
poverty) no longer existed, for I was now possessed, after all the
expenses of travelling, _&c._, of about fifteen pounds.

I spent several days in viewing the town, dock-yard, fleet, _&c._, and
in the evening generally visited the theatre, which was then open. About
a week after my arrival, reading the Portsmouth weekly paper, I saw an
advertisement for a clerk; and, as I found that some means of subsistence
would soon become necessary, and it was indifferent to me in what part
of the kingdom I sojourned, I determined to offer myself. Inquiring, as
directed, of Mottley, the bookseller, on the Parade, I was referred
to Moses Greetham, Esq., judge-advocate, also an attorney of the first
eminence. That gentleman, without hesitation, engaged me at a guinea
a week, and I next morning commenced my attendance at his office in
High-street. About the same time, my companion D⸺ suddenly quitted the
town, without acquainting me of his intention; and I was informed, on
inquiry, that he had gone to Southampton, but on what speculation I never
learnt, nor did I ever afterwards see or hear more of him.

The nature of my new employment was very agreeable and full of variety.
Besides Mr. Greetham’s public duties on courts-martial, and his general
practice as a solicitor, he had a great deal of business relating to
prizes, their condemnation, sale, proceeds, _&c._; and on these occasions
all the parties concerned met in a spacious room at the Crown inn, where
an elegant dinner, with wines in abundance, was invariably provided at
the expense of the clients. These dinners occurred three or four times
every week, and as they were afterwards succeeded by coffee, _&c._, the
expenses of living, to myself and the other clerk of Mr. Greetham, who
(as well as the latter gentleman), always partook of the entertainment,
were considerably diminished. During intervals, between dinner, tea,
_&c._, we retired to an adjoining room, where an hour or two was devoted
to writing depositions, examining ships’ papers, and other matters
relative to the cause in question. This was, in fact, one of the best
situations I ever met with, and, from its respectability, would, no
doubt, had I continued steady, have ultimately led to prosperity and
independence; but my evil genius interposed to ruin this, as well as all
my former hopes of happiness.

The circumstance which occasioned my losing this place was indeed very
trivial, and hardly amounted to a crime. Among the number of persons with
whom we transacted business, was a native of Holland, who acted in many
cases as an interpreter to Mr. Greetham, on the part of those concerned
in prize causes. This man being an original, both in person and manners,
was an inexhaustible subject of laughter to myself and fellow-clerk, who
was much older than me, and we omitted no opportunity of indulging in
mirth at his expense. As he was not possessed of much penetration and was
of a very placid disposition, he was commonly insensible of our jokes,
or, at least, took them in good part; but one afternoon, when we were all
three taking coffee together, the Dutchman rising from his seat on some
occasion, with a cup of boiling hot coffee in his hand, my brother-clerk,
who was just then in a merry vein, winked at me to withdraw the
interpreter’s chair. I obeyed the signal with alacrity, and the poor
fellow, attempting to resume his seat, was in a moment thrown keel
upwards, and, as he fell, received the boiling fluid full in his face. I
was so unfeelingly mischievous as to laugh immoderately at the pain and
embarrassment of the poor Dutchman, who certainly cut a most ridiculous
figure; but my fellow-clerk, who possessed more prudence than myself,
restrained his mirth, and, with a serious air, affected to condole with
the sufferer on his misfortune. He even carried his hypocrisy so far as
to express displeasure at the mischievous trick I had played. I felt much
indignation at his duplicity of conduct, and regretted, when too late,
that I had suffered myself to be made the dupe of his treachery; for I
was afterwards convinced that he was jealous of my abilities, and feared
I should supplant him in the favour of Mr. Greetham. The consequence
of this injudicious frolic was, that the interpreter complained to my
employer, who the next morning rebuked me severely for behaving with such
unbecoming freedom towards a respectable man in his immediate service;
and, observing that such levity of conduct rendered me unfit for his
office, Mr. Greetham presented me with a guinea, although this was only
the second day of the week, and declared he had no further occasion for
me.

Being now once more disengaged, I began to think of returning to London;
but, having still a little money left, I continued about a week longer
in Portsmouth, during which time I took up my lodging at the Blue Posts’
tavern, in Point-street, where I lived in the most sumptuous manner,
drinking my wine freely, and pretending that I was waiting for the
departure of the East India fleet, in which I was going out a passenger,
and that I expected my baggage from town in a few days. I had, while in
the service of Mr. Greetham, made several efforts to obtain clothes,
_&c._, upon the credit of my living with that gentleman; but I found the
Portsmouth tradesmen too wary to be imposed upon, and only succeeded
to a very trifling amount. I had, however, bilked my late lodging in
St. Mary’s street, and intended playing the same trick at the Blue
Posts. Finding, at length, that the landlord and waiters viewed me
with scrutinizing eyes, and appeared tacitly to ask for payment of my
reckoning, I left the coffee-room one evening after dinner, on pretence
of going to the play, and immediately quitted the town, taking the road
to Petersfield on foot.

On arriving at the latter place, which I had omitted in my journey
downwards, by striking into the Chichester road at Liphook, I levied a
small contribution, under the old pretext of going to Portsmouth, _&c._,
and then pursued my course to London, where I arrived in good spirits,
after an absence of eight weeks, with about ten pounds in my pocket,
having lived well during my expedition, and enjoyed a variety of pleasant
entertainment.




CHAPTER VI.

    _Still much embarrassed to support Appearances.—Meet
    with the Surgeon of a Frigate.—Our Conversation and its
    Result.—Negotiation set on foot with the Captain.—I obtain
    an Appointment as Midshipman.—Fitted out by my Friends in
    the most liberal manner.—Join my Ship.—Delighted with my new
    Situation.—Account of my Messmates, and other Matters._


I had continued some months in this course of life, and was frequently
reduced to very great shifts; on these occasions I had recourse to those
accommodating persons, called pawnbrokers, who obligingly lend money at
the moderate interest of seventy-three hundred per cent.! as has been
clearly proved in a late publication. I sometimes raised the wind by my
old expedient of obtaining goods on credit, called in the cant language
_maceing_: these I converted into ready money for immediate purposes.
By such artifices I contrived to support a genteel appearance, though
sometimes bordering on the shabby. My principal enjoyments, indeed, were
not of the most extravagant nature, with the exception of theatrical
amusements. I commonly spent my evenings (if not at the Blue Lion), at
some genteel porter or chop-house, frequented chiefly by attornies’
clerks and the neighbouring tradesmen; where I enjoyed a pipe and an
evening paper, and at the same time listened to the conversation of the
surrounding guests, amusing myself with their various characters and
peculiarities. I frequently dined, from the same motives, at different
ordinaries, particularly one at the Saracen’s-Head, Snow-Hill.

One day, after dining at this house, I adjourned to the coffee-room, and,
seating myself in a box, called for a glass of negus, and a daily paper.
I was soon joined by a gentleman of a very prepossessing aspect, who I
perceived, by the buttons on his coat, to be a warrant officer in the
navy. After the customary compliments, we entered into conversation; and
he soon let me understand that he was surgeon of a frigate called the
Astræa.

Delighted with an opportunity of expatiating on my favourite topic,
I asked many questions concerning the service; and the eagerness of
my manner convinced this gentleman that I had a strong inclination to
enter into it. He appeared pleased with my vivacity of manner, and the
pertinence of my remarks; and having extracted from me a confession of my
inclinations, and a brief account of my family and expectancies, he, with
the greatest kindness, undertook to write in my favour to Captain Dacres,
his commander, who was then at his seat in Devonshire, the frigate being
in dock at Sheerness; assuring me there was little doubt of my obtaining
a midshipman’s birth, provided my friends would consent to it, and fit
me out in a suitable manner for the occasion. I was in raptures at the
result of this fortunate meeting; and expressing the warmest gratitude
for such friendship shewn to an utter stranger, assured Mr. Kennedy
(for this was the surgeon’s name), of my choice being approved by my
grandfather, who anxiously wished me to fix on some profession, which
might afford a prospect of future independence. It was therefore settled
that Mr. Kennedy should write to the Captain without delay, and that
I should immediately entreat my grandfather to sanction my views, and
to write also to Capt. Dacres, requesting his approbation and commands
respecting me. Mr. Kennedy further recommended that I should, in the
interim, take a trip to Sheerness, and wait on the commanding-officer,
Mr. Rowley, who was then, with the Astræa’s crew, on board the Carolina
hulk, during the frigate’s repair. For this end he furnished me with a
line of introduction to Lieut. Rowley, and added that he should himself
be at Sheerness, where his family resided, in a few days. He observed
that I should be much amused with the excursion, as I had never been on
board a king’s ship, and that I should also open an acquaintance with the
young gentlemen who, in all probability, were to be my future messmates
and companions.

I immediately wrote in the most pressing terms to my grandfather,
assuring him that his refusal to ratify my choice would render me
completely miserable; but that if I was indulged in my desire, I would
never again become troublesome to any of my friends, or betray any future
signs of inconstancy or caprice. I concluded with expressing my hopes of
his receiving a favourable answer from the captain, and that I should in
a few days have this intimation communicated in a letter from himself,
approving of the steps I had taken.

Having so done, I equipped myself as handsomely as my means would admit,
and the next day set out for Sheerness, where I arrived in high spirits,
and proceeded on board the Carolina. On presenting my credentials to
the first lieutenant, I was very politely received, and invited to
the ward-room, where I was introduced to several other officers, who,
on learning my intentions, and that I was recommended by the doctor,
welcomed me in the kindest terms, and highly commended my spirit. After
refreshing myself, Mr. Rowley sent for a midshipman, whom he requested
to shew me every attention, and to introduce me to his messmates as a
person likely soon to become a brother Mid. This young man obeyed with
the greatest pleasure, and I soon became perfectly at home. My conductor
next took me through every part of the hulk, and I was both pleased and
astonished at the novelty of the objects I met with. The hulk had been
a line-of-battle ship, and her interior was, of course, extensive and
capacious. The decks were crowded with hucksters, who exposed provisions,
fruits, and other articles for sale. Groups of sailors with their girls
were seen dancing to the music of a fiddle or a fife; others were engaged
at cards, draughts, _&c._ Grog was every where the order of the day; but
still the most perfect regularity and cleanliness pervaded every part
of this wooden world. Having satisfied my curiosity, I returned to the
midshipmen’s birth, which was merely a large space in the after-part of
the orlop deck, enclosed with canvass, to render it warm and private.
I obtained from these young gentlemen a list of such clothes, books,
instruments, _&c._, as were requisite to form a genteel out-fit; and an
estimate of the probable cost of the whole, which I found to be at least
80_l._ I now received, by the ward-room steward, an invitation to dine
with the lieutenants, _&c._ The party was increased by the company of
some ladies from the shore, and the repast was excellent. Wit, wine, and
grog, abounded, and I now conceived I had found the sphere of life in
which I could enjoy unalloyed happiness. After sitting a reasonable time,
I expressed a wish to view the town of Sheerness, the dock-yard, _&c._,
and requested Mr. Rowley to permit the midshipman before-mentioned to
go on shore with me. To this he kindly assented, and ordered a boat to
be manned on purpose; stipulating, however, that we should return at a
reasonable hour, and that I would make use of a spare cot, in the cabin
of the third lieutenant, who was absent on leave. My kind young friend
shewed me the objects most worthy of remark; and we then adjourned to
the Marlborough-head inn, where we took some coffee, and about eight
o’clock returned to the hulk. My conductor, having reported his return
to the first lieutenant, wished me good night, and I took a seat at the
ward-room table, where the party was now reduced to the first and second
lieutenants, the master, purser, and lieutenant of marines. I now found
that grog was to be the order of the night also; but as I had never
been accustomed to that beverage, in the way they drank it, I could
not help betraying my dislike; on which Mr. Rowley, in a good-humoured
way, assured me that I should never make a sailor without I could learn
to drink grog. I was therefore constrained to make a glass, which I
did pretty stiff, as the sailors term it; and its inspiring qualities
soon caused me to banish all reserve. Mr. Rowley conversed with great
appearance of regard on my future prospects; gave me a most amiable
character of the captain; and instructed me in the outlines of my duty,
as well as in the conduct I ought to pursue for my own advantage. He
informed me, the Astræa would be undocked in about three weeks, and that
I had therefore no time to lose in equipping myself.

After as pleasant and rational an evening as I ever remember to have
spent, I retired to rest in the neat little cabin, I have before
mentioned; and slept for the first time in my life on salt-water. The
next morning, after breakfast, I had the pleasure of seeing my worthy
friend, the surgeon, who had just arrived from town. He insisted on my
dining with himself and family ashore; I therefore took a respectful
leave of Mr. Rowley, and the other gentlemen in the ward-room; a most
cordial farewell of my brother Mids, as I was proud to call them; and,
receiving the wishes of all parties for my speedy return to join the
ship, I accompanied Mr. Kennedy on shore. I spent a pleasant day at his
lodgings, and in the evening set out on my return to London, highly
pleased with my excursion, and indulging the most pleasing hopes of
future happiness.

In a week’s time, I had the pleasure of receiving a letter from my
grandfather, wherein he informed me that my entreaties were granted,
though with much reluctance on the part of most of my friends; and
enclosing a handsome letter from Captain Dacres, who expressed his
willingness to receive me as a midshipman on board His Majesty’s ship
Astræa, out of respect to the recommendation of his surgeon, and because
he would not defeat the hopes of a young man who might one day prove an
ornament to the service. My grandfather concluded with desiring I would
immediately come down to S⸺shire, for the purpose of taking leave of
my friends and receiving the necessary sum to defray the expenses of my
equipment.

I obeyed this welcome summons without delay, and, after a stay of several
days at S⸺, I took an affectionate leave of all my relatives, who could
not divest themselves of anxiety on my account; and returned to town
with nearly 100_l._ in my pocket, my other friends having contributed
liberally to assist my grandfather in this emergency.

On arriving in town, I took lodgings in the New Exchange Coffee-house
in the Strand, being a house frequented by naval officers, and to which
Lieutenant Rowley had recommended me. My first care was to purchase a
large and strong chest, which having sent to my lodgings, I proceeded to
buy linen, bedding, uniforms, books, _&c._ _&c._; and of course, did not
forget an elegant hanger, a dirk, and a cocked-hat, richly bound with
gold lace.

I was so diligent in this affair, that in ten days I had every thing
ready; and, embarking with my luggage on board a Sheerness packet, the
same day sailed down the river Thames. After a favourable passage,
we arrived at Sheerness; and, as we passed through the fleet, I had
the pleasure of seeing my ship lashed alongside the Carolina, having
the preceding day come out of dock. As soon as the sloop anchored, I
went on board the hulk, and was received with kind encouragement by
my superior officers, and with the most lively pleasure by my future
messmates. Mr. Rowley very kindly sent the cutter to bring my chest,
_&c._, from the packet; and I was then formally introduced by that
gentleman to the midshipmen’s birth. After a jovial evening, spent in
festivity and merriment, I retired to my hammock, in which I slept well,
notwithstanding the novelty of my situation. The next day was spent in
overhauling my chest, as the young tars termed an inspection of its
contents; and I had the pleasure to find, that my judgment and taste in
the purchases I had made, were universally approved of. Day after day
increased the happiness I felt in my novel and respectable situation; and
my gratitude to those who were, under Providence, the promoters of my
good fortune.

The mess of which I was become a member, consisted of eleven persons;
namely, nine midshipmen of different ages, the captain’s clerk, and
surgeon’s mate: the latter was a most curious character, a Welshman
named Jones; and reminded me, on a very short acquaintance, of Morgan in
_Roderic Random_, whom he resembled in many particulars: and I soon found
that he was, like him, a kind of butt for the others to exercise their
waggery upon; but in the main he was a good-hearted, inoffensive young
man. The captain’s clerk was a genteel youth, who had served under his
present commander several years, and was in expectation of being soon
promoted to the rank of purser, through his interest. Of the rest, two or
three were midshipmen who had also served nearly the limited term; one
a master’s mate, and the rest youngsters of different ages. The whole
were of good families, and liberally supported by their friends. I was
called upon to subscribe my monthly quota towards the mess, which was
received by one of the senior members, acting as caterer; and a plentiful
sea-stock of all necessary comforts was daily accumulating, preparatory
to our approaching cruise in the North-sea, to which station the Astræa
belonged.

About a week after my joining the ship, the captain came on board,
received me very politely, and gave me the best advice as to my future
conduct. He was an old officer who had been at sea from his youth,
possessed an excellent heart, and a most conciliating address, blended
with the bluntness and unaffected good humour peculiar to seamen. He
was advanced in years at the time I served under him; and I perceive
by a late _Navy List_ that his long and meritorious services have been
rewarded with the post of Governor of the Naval Asylum, an institution
which does honour to the country and the government that established it.




CHAPTER VII.

    _My rapid progress in Navigation.—Become a good Sailor in
    Theory.—The Approach of a severe Winter somewhat damps my
    Pleasure.—Begin to repent my Bargain.—Duty excessively
    fatiguing, and Situation uncomfortable.—Advised to alter my
    Course.—Appointed Captain’s Clerk, and find myself at home
    to a Peg.—The Frigate ordered up the River Thames.—I visit
    London.—Become enamoured of a fair Cyprian.—Desert my Ship on
    her account._


In a few days, the frigate being completely equipped, was cast off from
alongside the Carolina, and all hands being on board, we dropped down to
the Nore, from whence we sailed for Yarmouth Roads, where the admiral of
the North Sea fleet was then lying; soon after which we put to sea, on a
cruise off the coast of Holland. I immediately applied myself assiduously
to the study of navigation, in which I was so successful, that I was
in a few weeks capable of keeping a dead reckoning. It was required of
the midshipmen to deliver in daily at noon, an account of the ship’s
course, distance, _&c._, performed in the last 24 hours. These different
calculations, deduced from the remarks on the log-board, were presented
to the captain, who, on a comparison of the whole, formed his opinion of
the several operators’ ingenuity, and praised or censured accordingly.
I had the satisfaction to find that my performances were generally
approved of, and gained me much applause from their correctness. This
success was probably owing to the advantages I possessed over most of
my companions, in point of education, improved by extensive practice in
figures, and to a closeness of application arising from my experience
in the world, of which they (whose acquirements were merely scholastic)
were incapable. I was remarked also for the neatness and perspicuity
with which I kept my log-book and journal, which I never suffered, like
many others, to be in arrears. I was not quite so happy in my efforts to
become a good practical sailor. I learnt indeed, with great facility,
the names and uses of every rope in the ship, and could apply to them
without hesitation on all occasions, and I had a correct idea of the
manœuvres necessary in tacking, wearing, reefing, _&c._, as far as theory
extended; but unhappily my constitution being naturally delicate, and my
nerves uncommonly weak, I found myself much embarrassed, when duty or
inclination prompted me to go aloft, on which occasions I was subject to
a giddiness in my head, which rendered my situation extremely perilous,
and though I endeavoured by perseverance to overcome this weakness, I
could never totally banish the timidity with which I was affected. On
this account, though I continued indefatigable in every other point of
my duty, I desisted, particularly in blowing weather, from ascending “the
high and giddy mast;” and I am firmly persuaded that it is only by going
to sea at a very tender age, that youth in general are rendered callous
to danger, and insensible of those fears, to which I was at all times
more or less subject. It is also probable that the various excesses in
which I had indulged since I first quitted my friends, had contributed
to impair a constitution naturally fragile, and to relax still more the
nervous system. Our first cruise produced no incident worth notice. We
maintained our station, when the weather would permit, off the Texel, and
were frequently so near the land, that we could distinguish and count the
Dutch fleet, lying at anchor in that harbour, from our mast-head: but
Mynheer was not disposed to put to sea, of which event we were ordered
to convey immediate intelligence to the admiral. The winter was now
approaching, and there was every appearance of its proving unusually
inclement. During this cruise, we lay-to for twenty-one successive days,
in a tremendous gale from the N. E., with only a storm jib, and fly-sail
set; and although we were in no immediate danger, having good sea-room,
and a tight ship, I found my ardour for a sea-faring life considerably
abated. I was obliged to turn out of a warm bed at 12 or 4 o’clock in
each night, to take my watch, the hardship of which duty was a severe
penance upon me. The excessive cold, added to loss of rest, produced a
drowsiness which rendered me incapable of resisting the inclination I
felt to sleep, whenever I could retire to a private spot unobserved;
which was generally in the long-boat, under a gun carriage, or some
such hiding place. I was, however, frequently discovered in my retreat,
by accident, or by the mischievous information of some watch-mate,
whose hardy frame was proof against fatigue. On those occasions the
lieutenant of the watch would order the rest of the midshipmen to throw
a horse-bucket of salt-water over me, which did not fail to awaken
me quickly: but on starting up, shivering and amazed, I could never
ascertain the perpetrators of this ablution, who having disappeared,
would come up to me, very gravely condoling on my misfortune, which they
stated to proceed from a grampus having blown over me from alongside.
This piece of sea wit, which I soon understood, produced a general laugh
at my expense; how ever I was as ready at other times to practise the
same exploit upon some other unlucky sleeper; and my chief consolation
was, that the farce always ended with the sufferer being ordered to take
off his wet clothes, and turn in to his hammock, which sometimes saved
two or three hours on deck. At other times, sleeping on our watch, or
other instances of remissness in duty, were not so slightly passed over;
we were sometimes sentenced to sit on the main-top-mast head, for two,
four, and sometimes eight hours; at other times to sit on the weather
cat-head, exposed to a cutting wind; and other similar punishments,
depending on the humour or severity of the officer of the watch. In
addition to the hardships and fatigues of duty, I began to find my
situation in the mess grow daily more irksome. I soon perceived that a
midshipman’s birth (or mess-room) is an epitome of the world at large,
the weaker party goes to the wall, and is subject to many insults and
impositions from those who are his superiors in seniority, strength, or
interest. There were also frequent instances of intrigue and treachery;
and as among so many persons there must be various dispositions, there
were not wanting envious and malicious minds, whose delight was in
fomenting mischief and detraction. Being naturally of a peaceable turn,
hating nothing so much as a life of dissension, and abhorring tyranny of
every description, I now wished myself emancipated from this state of
bondage, as to me it seemed; and I discovered, when too late, that “all
is not gold that glitters,” and that the situation of a midshipman (which
I had once considered the _summum bonum_ of honour and happiness) was
not, any more than others, wholly free from care and inquietude. However
I continued to weather the gale, as well as I could; and conscious
of the rectitude of my intentions, suffered patiently those little
mortifications I had not power to avert.

After a cruise of two months, we returned to port, when I had the
pleasure of hearing from my respected friends in S⸺shire. Our stay in
Yarmouth roads was short; we put to sea again in company with several
smaller vessels, of which our captain was commodore. A violent storm,
however, soon dispersed our little squadron, and we at length with much
difficulty gained the river Humber, from whence we returned to Yarmouth.
During this winter we were continually at sea, except for very short
intervals; and the oldest seaman in the ship declared they had never
known a more tempestuous season. Several fine frigates, sloops, brigs,
_&c._, were lost in the North Sea, and on the northern coasts of England.
My hardships, of course, rather increased than diminished, and I heartily
repented the step I had taken; not that I disliked the service, or the
mode of living on ship-board; but I found myself unequal to the duty of
watching, _&c._, and was also uncomfortably situated with respect to my
messmates, whose manners and ideas of enjoyment did not coincide with
mine. The notion of finding pleasure in books was ridiculed by them;
and I was sometimes told that I ought to have been a parson; but it was
agreed on all sides, that I was better adapted for a clerk than a sailor.
These hints and suggestions were not thrown away upon me; I felt the
force of their justice, and longed for an opportunity of ameliorating my
situation which at length, to my great joy, unexpectedly occurred.

The captain’s clerk I have before mentioned was, by the interest of
Captain Dacres, promoted to the rank of purser; and as soon as this
was known, my brother Mids unanimously advised me, in the sea phrase,
to “bear up” for a scribe; meaning to quit my present station, and
petition the captain to receive me as his clerk. I took this advice,
and was happy enough to succeed. As I had spent much of my time with my
predecessor, and took pleasure in observing his various public accompts,
in the execution of which I had often assisted him, I required but little
instruction to enable me to undertake this office.

I must not omit to notice here, a laughable incident, consequent on my
dereliction. The midshipmen in general, on the day of my appointment,
surrounded me in our cabin, and with great ceremony, proceeded to cut off
the _weekly accompts_[6] from the coat I had on; proclaiming, at the same
time, that I had now assumed a different character, and had no further
right to the honourable uniform of a Mid. I was obliged, therefore, to
have this appendage taken from every coat and jacket I possessed.

Behold me now once more in my own sphere! Though I had relinquished
the hope of ever becoming an admiral, yet here was another field for
promotion opened for me. After a service of two years, I might obtain
a purser’s warrant, which, though a less honourable station than the
former, is perhaps more lucrative, and certainly less exposed to danger.

I had now a commodious cabin to myself, in which I was free from
interruption, only frequenting the mess cabin at meal times, or when I
was inclined for company. I slept peaceably in my cot, while my former
companions were exposed to the wind and weather upon deck. As to the
duties of my office, they were merely a source of pleasing amusement to
me: I soon became expert in their performance; and my attention gained me
the esteem of both captain and purser.

It is needless to trouble the reader with a journal of the ship’s
proceedings, during the remainder of the time I continued in her; it may
suffice to state briefly, that we took many cruises in the North Sea,
in the course of which we visited the Orkney Isles, Leith Roads, the
River Humber, Osely Bay, Robin Hood’s Bay, Harwich Harbour, and other
anchorages on the coasts of England and Scotland, to which we were driven
by stress of weather, or other causes. In one of our cruises, we captured
a beautiful French lugger privateer, of fourteen guns, and fifty-eight
men, belonging to Dunkirk, after a chase of three hours, in a gale of
wind, in which we went at the rate of thirteen and a half knots per hour,
under a fore-sail and close reefed main top-sail only. During the ensuing
summer, being appointed to convoy above three hundred sail of merchantmen
to the Baltic Sea, we lay for several weeks at Elsineur, in Denmark;
at which place I went on shore, and had some pleasant rambles into the
adjacent country, visiting Copenhagen which is twenty miles distant. I
also viewed the interior of that ancient castle, celebrated by Shakspeare
in the tragedy of _Hamlet_, and many other local curiosities.

The following spring, the Astræa was ordered up the river Thames,
for the purpose of receiving on board two hundred thousand pounds in
specie, which she was to convey to Cuxhaven, for the use of the Hamburgh
merchants. We accordingly came to an anchor at Greenhithe, sixteen miles
from London; and while the ship was undergoing some little repairs, I
obtained leave of absence for three days, of which I availed myself to
visit London, with the view of having a short cruise in that region of
pleasure. As I had lately received both pay and prize-money, and had also
been economical of what my relations had occasionally remitted me, I was
well provided for the purpose.

On the first night of my arrival in town, I went, of course, to the play,
where I was struck with the appearance of a very interesting young
Cyprian, whom I immediately accosted, and after the performance, attended
to her apartments in Bury-Street, St. James’s. Here every thing was
upon the most elegant scale, and I was so well pleased with my quarters
as well as with the lady, that I did not stir tack or sheet (except on
short excursions of pleasure in which she accompanied me) until the
expiration of my liberty, and then it was with much reluctance, I could
tear myself from this fascinating fair one. I was the more charmed with
her, as she exhibited a generosity of mind, seldom met with in females
of her description: and though she might have extracted from me my last
shilling, yet she was so far from being mercenary, that my expenses,
considering the enjoyments I had experienced, were comparatively
trifling. I returned, then, to my ship in due time, but still the
thoughts of the lovely Miss K⸺e incessantly recurred, and prevented my
enjoying a moment’s peace. My anxiety was increased by receiving a most
affectionate letter from her, within three days, according to a promise
she had given me at parting, in which she earnestly requested my leave
to visit me on board prior to our sailing. To this I would not, however,
consent, but gave a sort of conditional promise, almost indeed amounting
to a positive one, that I would see her again in town.

About a week after my return from London, I resolved to pay a second
visit to my inamorata; but as we were now ready for sea, and expected the
specie on board every hour, it was in vain to solicit leave. I therefore
determined to go ashore early as if to spend the day, which the whole
of the petty officers were allowed to do in turn. My intention was to
go post to London, and after a day and a night’s pleasure, to return on
board early the next morning, as I could easily frame some excuse for
staying ashore all night.

From some secret presentiment, however, which I conceived at the moment
I was about to step in the jolly-boat, I hurried down to my chest, and
hastily filling a clothes-bag with linen, gave it to one of the boys,
as if to take to the washerwoman, and immediately quitted His Majesty’s
ship Astræa (as the event proved) never more to return. I procured a man
to carry my bag to Dartford, a post town three miles from Greenhithe,
and fifteen from London; from whence I took a chaise, and in less than
two hours found myself in the arms of my fair enslaver. In order to give
the reader leisure to reflect on the blindness of mankind to their own
welfare, and to revile me in particular, as I deserve, for this mad and
unjustifiable conduct, I shall put an end to this Chapter.




CHAPTER VIII.

    _Consequences of my imprudent Secession.—Reduced to
    great Distress.—Become a Billiard-player.—Associate with
    Sharpers.—Engage with a Country Attorney.—Take leave of London
    once more._


The reader will here observe that I had left behind me, on my desertion,
a valuable chest of clothes, books, _&c._ _&c._, the purchase of which,
but sixteen months before, had cost my affectionate friends a large
sum; and I had now, by this rash act, defeated their fondest hopes, and
brought disgrace as well on them as on the worthy officer who procured
me the appointment. It is impossible, however, for my reader to condemn
my folly, or rather wickedness, in stronger terms than my own conscience
has ever since done. Surely there must, let moralists argue as they
will, be something like a fatality which governs the fortunes of some,
if not all, men; and which impels them headlong to their ruin, against
the voice of reason and of conscience, and the dictates of common sense.
But the retrospect affects me too much: I must not aggravate my present
sufferings by dwelling longer on what will not bear reflection. All I can
now do is to repent of all my errors; and I trust that Divine Power will
accept my repentance who best knows its sincerity.

Before I resume the thread of my narrative, I will just venture to give
the reader a few lines, descriptive of a midshipman’s life, which will
require, I trust, no apology, when I state that they were the production
of some of the junior members of our mess, and composed in the space of
a very few hours.—Of the correctness of the picture therein drawn, I can
truly say, _probatum est_.


VERSES

_Written on Board His Majesty’s Ship, the Astræa, by the younger
Midshipmen of that Frigate, 1798._

I.

    When in the Cockpit[7] all was dim,
    And not a Mid dar’d shew his glim[8];
        A youth was left alone:
    He scratch’d his head; survey’d his clothes;
    Then took the other cheering dose[9];
        And thus began his moan:—

II.

    Ah! cursed be that fatal day,
    When I from home was led astray,
        In this d⸺’d place to dwell:
    Oh! had I in the country stay’d
    I might have learnt some useful trade,
        And scorn’d the white lapelle[10].

III.

    When first on board the ship I went,
    My belly full, my mind content,—
        No sorrows touch’d my heart:
    I view’d my coat, so flash and new,
    My gay cockade, and hanger too,
        And thought them wondrous smart.

IV.

    But now, alas! my coat is rent;
    My hanger’s pawn’d; my money spent;
        My former friends I’ve miss’d;
    And when of hardships I complain,
    My messmates swear ’tis all in vain;
        And cry, “What made you list?”

V.

    But hark! I hear the corp’ral’s tread[11]:
    Another dose, and then to bed;
        Of ev’ry joy bereft;
    I shake my bottle with a doubt;
    My poor half-pint[12] is quite drain’d out;
        Not one kind drop is left!

VI.

    The youth with indignation burns;
    Into his hated hammock turns;
        Alas! not long to sleep:
    The quarter-master, with hoarse tongue,
    Awakes him; says, “The bell has rung:”
        He’s rous’d, his watch to keep.

VII.

    Shiv’ring he walks the quarter-deck,
    Dreading the stern lieutenant’s check,
        Who struts the weather-side[13];
    With glass and trumpet in his hand[14],
    He bellows forth _his_ harsh command,
        With arrogance and pride.

After the first transports of our meeting had subsided, it was mutually
agreed that I should reside altogether with Miss K⸺e, who, being ignorant
of my real circumstances, imagined I was capable of maintaining her and
myself, if not in the most splendid, at least in a comfortable manner. I
should have stated, however, that the pleasure I felt at being once more
free from control, and on my near approach to my favourite spot, London,
added to the passion I had conceived for this young lady, had completely
banished every idea of returning to my ship, long before I was set down
at the obelisk in St. George’s Fields, where I had exchanged my chaise
for a hackney coach, to prevent my being traced.

The following morning I examined into the state of my personal effects;
which I found to consist of a dozen fine shirts, about the same number of
neck-cloths, hose, and waistcoats, a few odd articles of other apparel,
and twenty-one pounds in money, together with an old family gold watch,
and the suit of blue I had on my back.

My fair acquaintance evinced some concern at the rash step I had taken;
which, imputing wholly to my affection for herself, drew from her
professions of gratitude and constancy, which I believe (from her youth
and ingenuous mind) to have been sincere. I determined now to domesticate
myself with this charming woman for a few weeks; as well to make up for
the privations I had suffered for the last sixteen months, by enjoying
every comfort money could procure, as to preclude any risk of being
apprehended for desertion before the ship’s departure.

During this retirement, which I might justly call a honeymoon, from
the happiness I experienced, I obtained from Miss K⸺e some account of
herself, and the misfortunes which had reduced her to the disgraceful
situation in which I found her. The following are the particulars:—

She was the second daughter of a respectable tradesman in the city,
who had placed her, with her elder sister, at a boarding school in
Queen-square, where she had become perfectly accomplished. About a year
before our acquaintance began, she had been accidentally seen walking
in the garden of the square, to which the young ladies had access, by
an officer of dragoons, who, being struck with her beauty, had employed
every art of bribery and intrigue, first to open a correspondence
by letter, and afterwards to obtain a personal interview, of which
opportunity he made such good use that he succeeded in seducing this
amiable child, then just fifteen years of age, to elope from her school,
to sacrifice to him, honour, fortune, and parental affection, and entail
on herself ruin, remorse, and endless shame!

This gallant hero treated her with the fondest attention, and spared no
expense to gratify her every wish, and, by a continual round of splendid
dissipation, to banish any reflections which might otherwise obtrude
themselves; and in this (owing to her youth and the natural levity of her
sex,) he so far succeeded that she felt not, for the first six months,
those compunctions which, sooner or later, must attend conscious guilt.
At the end of that time, however, her protector, being ordered abroad
with his regiment, left her with a slender provision in possession;
but for which he made up with most liberal promises of future bounty.
It is probable he had by this time gratified a passion which was at
first but of a sensual nature; and I am led to think his going abroad
was only a fiction, the better to cover his base design of deserting
her: be this as it might, she had never since heard from him; and,
as her little money was soon exhausted, she found herself alone and
friendless, and now first began to reflect on the consequences of her
imprudence. She had, on quitting the school, assumed the name of K⸺e,
which I have recorded her by, in order to avoid the inquiries of her
family; to whom shame and (perhaps false) delicacy, now deterred her
from a thought of returning. In the late scenes of her guilty prosperity
she had formed an acquaintance with several kept women who were living,
like herself, in elegant infamy. She now had recourse to some of these
friends for temporary assistance; but alas! they soon convinced her how
little is to be expected from such friendship, when adversity renders it
most essential. In a fatal moment she took the usual course of persons
similarly situated; she procured a suitable lodging where her misfortunes
were not known, and frequented the theatres and other public places;
at which (being a new face on the town), she was successful above all
her competitors in attracting the notice of the male sex. The pecuniary
emoluments she thence derived had enabled her to live elegantly; and
her person and carriage were so much above the common class of Cyprians
that she was still, at the time I first saw her, an object of general
admiration. Fortunately also her health was yet untainted, so that, could
I have found means for our mutual support, this connexion promised to
be a source of happiness to us both. She felt happy at the opportunity
of quitting a course of life which had always disgusted her; and little
regret for the past (being ignorant of the true state of my finances)
save when a melancholy thought of her disconsolate family caused a
temporary effusion of grief.

The first month or honeymoon of our connexion being expired, and the
Astræa long departed from the river, I began to revolve in my mind
the means of future subsistence. As I had spared no expense to render
our retirement pleasing, and had purchased for myself a suit of plain
clothes, I now found myself reduced to my last guinea, and I knew that
unless I hit upon some mode of speedily recruiting, I must have recourse
to the pawnbroker for another. These unpleasing reflections gave me
much uneasiness; but I carefully concealed it from my partner, and
preserved the same air of cheerfulness as before. At length came “th’
inevitable hour.” Money was wanting for household purposes, and I was
obliged to raise a few pounds, by depositing my watch in the usual place
of security. I accounted for the absence of this article by a pretence
that it wanted repair. This small supply lasted but a fortnight, as we
retrenched nothing of our mode of living; and I had lately accompanied
my dear Sarah to the theatres, and other places of diversion, for which
amusement she had as violent a passion as myself. But I have now to
relate an event, which no less afflicted than surprised me, and of which
I had not the most distant apprehension.

One night, towards the close of the last mentioned period, we had
returned late from the opera, and, being in high spirits though low in
pocket, I proposed to send for a small collation from the neighbouring
tavern, and to indulge in a little extra festivity: this was approved
of by my charmer, who indeed had no will but mine; and, our little maid
having procured the necessary requisites, we enjoyed a most comfortable
supper; after which we circulated the cheering glass, the wine receiving
an additional zest from the wit and enlivening conversation of my fair
companion. But mark the uncertainty of human happiness!

About two o’clock, as we were on the point of retiring to rest, we were
surprised by a sudden and loud knock at the street door, which being
unusual at so late an hour, caused a momentary alarm to us both. Before
we had time to form any idea of the cause, the door of our apartment
was burst rudely open, and three persons entered, at the sight of whom,
my unfortunate girl fainted in my arms, on the sofa whereon we sat.
One of the three persons, a respectable looking elderly gentleman,
from his tender anxiety, but mixed with some degree of severity, I soon
conjectured to be her unhappy father; in which I was not mistaken.
The other two immediately called the landlady of the house, by whose
assistance they recovered the poor girl from her swoon; which having
accomplished, they instantly hurried her down stairs, the old gentleman
darting an angry look at me, and left me so stupified with grief and
surprise, that I had not power to follow, or notice their proceedings. I
soon afterwards heard a coach drive from the door, on which the latter
was immediately shut, and the landlady coming up, informed me of what she
had gathered during a short conversation from the parties. It appeared
that the young lady had been seen with me the preceding night at the
opera-house, by a friend of her family, who knowing of her elopement, had
officiously followed us home, and then immediately given information to
her father, who applying instantly to Sir William Ford, the Bow-Street
magistrate, that gentleman had detached Messrs. Townshend and Carpmeal
(two of his principal officers) to assist him in the recovery of his lost
child. This they had effected as I have described; the anxiety of her
parent not suffering him to defer the business even till the ensuing day.
The woman added that on learning from her, the life his daughter had led
for some months prior to her acquaintance with me, and that I was not
her original seducer, he had declined the idea of apprehending me, which
the officers were otherwise empowered to do.

This melancholy event was a grievous affliction to me, who had
relinquished an honourable situation, purely on her account; and was now
not only deprived of a beloved object, but reduced to a state of utter
poverty. Notwithstanding every inquiry I could institute, I could never
obtain any further information as to the fate of Miss K⸺e, than what I
extracted by a bribe from one of the officers, who assured me that it
was her father’s intention to send her to a remote part of the kingdom,
where she had a female relation who had undertaken the care of her: but
this man declared that the name of her parents was known only to the
magistrate, which was perhaps true: and the dear girl had never even
disclosed her real name to myself, but had almost promised so to do on a
little longer acquaintance.

I now quitted this lodging, the wearing apparel of my late companion
being claimed by the landlady for some arrears of rent, as the father had
refused to take any thing from the house, and never approached it more. I
engaged a small apartment for myself in a more centrical situation; and,
to supply my immediate wants, deposited one article after another at the
pawnbroker’s, till I had no longer any thing left to deposit.

It was necessary, however, before my appearance became too shabby, to
find some means of support. As to my friends, I had given up every idea
of returning to them, nor did I, for some months after this, acquaint
them of the rash step I had taken: and when I afterwards did so, I amused
my poor grandfather with a fictitious account of my having returned to
the law, and assured him that I was doing well; for as I have before
hinted, I was so sensible of the inconvenience which that worthy man must
unavoidably suffer in his old age, from his too great liberality to me,
that I determined to submit to any hardships rather than be a further
incumbrance upon him.

I had, during my former residence in London, taken great delight in
billiards, and, by a frequent attendance at public tables, had become
a tolerably good player. I had renewed my acquaintance with this game,
since my last arrival in town; and, urged by necessity, I now deemed
it possible to pick up a little money at one of these _boards of green
cloth_. For this purpose I attended daily at the rooms in Bow-Street,
Covent Garden, where, by a few days play with the marker, I gained a
knowledge of the tables; and, as nothing contributes like practice to
improve one at this scientific game, I was soon enabled to engage with
such gentlemen as accidentally dropped in for an hour’s amusement, which
I obligingly afforded them at the expense of a few shillings.

These opportunities, however, only occurred in the early part of
the day; for in the evenings, the tables, as well as the spoil, were
engrossed by a combination of five or six sharpers, who regularly
attended for the same purpose as myself; but their operations were upon a
more extensive scale: by forming sham matches among themselves, engaging
by-standers to bet on either side, and then playing booty, and by various
other expedients, they frequently obtained large sums, and were enabled
to appear genteelly about town. These gentry soon viewed me with a
jealous eye; regarding me, I suppose, as an interloper, who encroached
upon their rights of plunder. I therefore found it would be necessary
to have an understanding with their party, by which means I should reap
a much better harvest than I could do by a mere course of fair play, in
which I was sometimes unavoidably beat. I at length effected my object,
by means of an elderly man, whose good-natured countenance encouraged
me to introduce a conversation on the subject. This person, who was
a veteran in the arts of play, and of some consequence in the gang,
seemed flattered by the respectful manner in which I addressed him, and,
complimenting me on the talents I possessed, assured me I should receive
from himself every advice requisite to render me useful; and that I might
depend on the most equitable treatment in the division of any money I
might be accessary to obtaining.

I was the same evening formally accepted as a member of this sharping
fraternity; and after a libation at the Piazza coffee-house, they
repaired to the scene of action, where I soon afterwards dropped in, as
if by accident; and, having played a few games with the marker, in which
I betrayed great want of skill, I was at length challenged by one of our
party, who had been seen at other times to play well. Of course, bets in
plenty were offered against me; and in the middle of the game, pretending
to be irritated at the general discouragement of the by-standers, I
affected to grow warm, and took odds of several gentlemen, that I won the
game (which was now six to four against me); my antagonist also backed
himself by laying the same odds with some of our confederates, after
which, no more bets being offered, he relaxed a little in his play. I
improved in proportion, and having, for form’s sake, suffered the game
to arrive at twenty all, the flats (or strangers) began to look foolish,
and endeavoured to hedge off, as the phrase is, but without effect. I
therefore made a successful hazard, and decided the game, to the great
chagrin of those who had so warmly opposed me. The person who played with
me, declared I had won by mere luck, and random play, and, throwing down
his bets with a passionate air, swore he would play me the following day
for a larger sum, and give me five points. This finesse prevented any
suspicion in the minds of the losers, whom it was our interest to keep
ignorant of the combination existing. The room soon after getting thin,
we departed one at a time, and meeting at the usual place, apportioned
the division of the evening’s profit, which amounted to about thirty
pounds.

I continued to associate with this knot of gamblers for several weeks;
but I soon found that our success was very uncertain, depending upon
the number of strangers who happened to visit the rooms; as those who
had once been duped by us, were always cautious in future, and would
neither play nor bet with us. It was only, therefore, from gentlemen who
were not in the habit of frequenting this house, that we had a chance of
gaining any thing worth notice: so that upon the whole, what I acquired
was barely sufficient to keep me above want. The summer too, having now
commenced, at which season there is but little company at the billiard
rooms, the confederates to whom I had attached myself, left town upon
a tour to the different races, some with an E O table, others trusting
to their general abilities at hazard playing, cocking, _&c._ As I had
neither found the pleasure or profit which I derived from a connexion
with them to afford that satisfaction I expected, I was not concerned
at a separation from them. I therefore rubbed on as well as I could by
myself, spending my leisure time much in my usual manner, but always
taking care to preserve a genteel appearance, on which I knew every
success depended.

As I was one morning reading the papers at the coffee-house where I
commonly breakfasted, I met with an advertisement for a clerk to an
attorney in the country. As this was a situation I had never held, and
the season of the year was favourable to an excursion, I determined to
offer my services, promising myself, at least, to derive some benefit
to my health, and amusement from changing the scene; but I had always
a partiality for London, and could never wholly reconcile myself to a
country life, since I first tasted of the various pleasures with which
the metropolis abounds.

I immediately applied to the advertising parties, Messrs. Dalton and
Edwards, in King’s Bench Walk, Temple, and was introduced to the latter
gentleman, who informed me it was a Mr. Dalton of Bury St. Edmunds, who
wanted a clerk capable of conducting his business. As I had acquired
a greater share of experience, and a better insight of the different
branches of the profession, than many others would do in a much longer
course of service, I hesitated not to undertake the duties required;
and as expedition was necessary, Mr. Edwards, after some few inquiries,
engaged me immediately at a weekly salary of one pound, which in so cheap
a part of the country, he observed, was equal to twice the sum in London.
He desired me if possible, to set out that very day, and writing a short
letter of introduction to Mr. Dalton, gave it me, together with a small
sum to bear my expenses to Bury. I then took my leave, and having gained
the street, I was curious to know in what terms my credentials ran. The
wafer being still wet, I opened the letter, in which Mr. Edwards had
briefly stated the agreement he had made with me, and concluded in these
words: “I have every reason to believe him an expert clerk, and do not
doubt but he will prove an acquisition.” How far this good gentleman’s
prediction was verified, the next Chapter will disclose. I lost no time
in preparing for my journey, and having but few clothes to pack up, I
took my departure from the Blue Boar in Bishopsgate-street, at seven
o’clock, P. M., and the next morning arrived at St. Edmundsbury.




CHAPTER IX.

    _Account of my Situation at Bury St. Edmunds.—Obstinately
    determine to relinquish it, and return to London.—Defraud
    several Tradesmen.—Quit the Town, and arrive in the
    Metropolis.—Obtain a quantity of Wearing Apparel under false
    Pretences._


I found Mr. Dalton to be a gentleman of high respectability in his
profession, and of the most prepossessing manners. He gave me a very
kind and polite reception, and after some conversation, conducted me
himself to the best inn in the town, where he ordered that I should be
entertained at his expense, until I could provide myself a convenient
residence. Mr. Dalton had a very handsome house, and kept several
servants, but, being a bachelor and a good deal from home, it was not
convenient for me to reside with him. The day after my arrival, he,
therefore, advised me to make inquiry for board and lodging in some
regular and decent family, and to consult him on the eligibility before
I made any engagement. I accordingly began my inquiries, and at length
found accommodation in the family of a tradesman of whom Mr. Dalton
approved. Here I was to be lodged and boarded very comfortably at nine
shillings per week! This charge, to me, who had been accustomed to the
expenses of London, appeared moderate in the extreme: however, being
willing to make the best bargain I could, I informed the good woman, that
as I should receive my salary quarterly from Mr. Dalton, I could only
undertake to pay her at the like period, to which proposal she therefore
readily consented. My motive in this proceeding was, that in case I
quitted Bury before the end of the first quarter, I might decamp without
coming to a settlement, and by this means have my weekly pay of twenty
shillings entire for other purposes.

Having removed from the inn to my new abode, I was instructed by Mr.
Dalton in the nature of my employment, which was chiefly to copy or
engross deeds in conveyancing, and other similar documents, peculiar to
country practitioners. In a few days I had a correct idea of what was
necessary to be done, and Mr. Dalton perceiving I required no instruction
from him, gave me sole charge of the office, which was detached from
his house, and left it to my discretion as to the hours or duration
of my attendance. This liberty I did not abuse, but kept every thing
in such exact order that I had soon the pleasure of giving him entire
satisfaction.

Mr. Dalton kept a gig, and two blood-horses: as he had a good deal
of public business, relating to county matters, and was one of the
commissioners for the redemption of the land-tax, which sometimes
obliged him to attend meetings at the several market-towns round about
Bury, he often took me with him in his gig, attended by his servant on
horseback. On these occasions there were usually public dinners at the
principal inns, provided at the expense of the county, or the persons
interested. The fare was always sumptuous, and there was no stint of the
best wines. At other times I was detached on horseback, accompanied by
the servant as a guide, to transact business with different clients, in
various parts of the county. I was not limited in my expenses, and the
account I presented on my return, was freely liquidated by Mr. Dalton.

Upon the whole, this was one of the most agreeable employments I ever
engaged in, and had I prudently retained it for a few years, there is
no doubt but I should have met with the most liberal encouragement from
my employer. But my natural inconstancy still prevailed; and I had
been but a few weeks at Bury, before I grew tired of the country, and
thought of nothing but returning to London, with such spoil as I could
obtain from the credulity of the tradesmen in the town. With this view,
I bespoke clothes, boots, linen, and other articles at various shops,
informing the parties that I should expect credit till the expiration of
my quarter, to which, on account of the respectable gentleman I served,
they readily consented. As soon as any of these goods were brought home,
I immediately packed them up in small portable parcels, which I sent up
to London by the coach, consigned to a pawnbroker with whom I was on
intimate terms; desiring him to receive and keep them safe, until he saw
me. I also coached off in the same clandestine manner, such of my own
apparel, _&c._, as I had in my trunk, in which, to prevent discovery, I
deposited stones or bricks to preserve its gravity. By these means I had
nothing to impede my sudden departure, when rendered necessary by the
arrival of the expected quarter-day.

I must here observe, to meet any surprise the reader might feel on
the subject, that as I had never at this time been connected with
downright thieves, so I had never yet committed an actual theft, save
the embezzlement of money at Liverpool; (which indeed the law has lately
made a felonious taking;) though I therefore scrupled not at practising
a fraud, I was not yet sufficiently depraved to commit a robbery. This
will account for my not robbing the premises of Mr. Dalton, which at a
subsequent period of my life, would have been my primary object, as I
had access to every part of the house, and have frequently viewed with
longing eyes, the servant cleaning a handsome service of plate in the
pantry.

I had now been about two months at Bury, and had no intention of
absconding till the expiration of the third; when an accidental event
induced me to hasten my departure. One afternoon Mr. Dalton had written
several letters in the office, and the footman being elsewhere engaged,
he requested me to drop them in the post-office, in my way home. I
accordingly brought them out in my hand, and happening inadvertently to
cast my eye on the superscriptions, I perceived that one was addressed
to Mr. Lyne, tailor, Cecil-street, Strand, London. Being curious to know
what correspondence Mr. Dalton could have with a tailor, I opened this
letter, and found the contents to the following effect: “Mr. Lyne,—By
the waggon which goes from hence on Monday next, and arrives at the
Blue Boar in Bishopsgate-street on Wednesday night, I shall send you a
portmanteau corded and sealed, but not locked, containing two coats,
sixteen waistcoats, fourteen pair of breeches, and a suit of uniform of
the city Light Horse[15]. Most of these articles are nearly as good as
new, but as they have now become unfashionable, I desire you will dispose
of them to the best advantage, on my account, and send me down by the
same conveyance, two suits made in the present taste,” _&c._

It immediately struck me, that if I took measures accordingly, I might
arrive in town time enough to intercept and obtain this trunk from the
inn; for which purpose I put this letter in my pocket, and the others in
the post-office. The next day, happening to go into Mr. Dalton’s kitchen,
I there saw the portmanteau corded up, and directed; and on questioning
the servant in a careless manner about it, he informed me that he was
going to carry it to the ⸺ inn, the following evening, in readiness for
the departure of the waggon. The same afternoon it happened, (which was a
most fortunate circumstance for me,) that Mr. Dalton again begged of me
to put some letters in the post-office, which he had not done above twice
or thrice since I came into his service. Looking at these letters, I saw
to my surprise, another addressed to Mr. Lyne as before, which, eagerly
opening, I found was to mention something Mr. Dalton said he had forgot
in his letter of the preceding day. I immediately destroyed this second
letter, which (had it come to hand) might have frustrated my design.

I now prepared matters for eloping, and sent off the remainder of my
effects by the coach as before: but my good fortune produced another
windfall of which I had no expectation. The day before my intended
departure, I was walking in the market-place with a young man, who was
clerk to another attorney in the town, and the conversation turning upon
watches, my companion observed that if I wished to purchase one, he would
introduce me to a maker of his acquaintance, who would use me well on
his account. I took him at his word, and begged he would immediately do
so. We were then within a few doors of the shop, into which we entered;
and I perceived over the window in large characters, “Lumley and
_Gudgeon_, Watchmakers.” I laughed inwardly at the singularity of the
latter name, which I considered ominous of my success in the imposition
I meant to put upon him. After a short preliminary conversation, my
acquaintance having business to do, took his leave, and Mr. Gudgeon
himself proceeded to shew me several watches. I informed him that I
wished to have a good one, but my circumstances would not allow me to
go to a high price. Mr. Gudgeon assured me it was better to have a good
one at once, and recommended me a very handsome gilt watch, capped and
jewelled, and his own make, which he said he could warrant to perform
well, and for which he asked me eight guineas. I replied that as my
weekly salary from Mr. Dalton was but one pound, I could not afford to
give so much, and began to examine others of a cheaper kind, but still
letting him see that I had a strong inclination for the one he had
recommended. This induced him to repeat his praises of the latter, and to
press me with greater energy, to fix upon it. I at length (with a shew
of much reluctance) suffered myself to be persuaded; but I begged leave
to observe, that as I was influenced in every thing by the advice of
my good master, Mr. Dalton, I would not venture to make so expensive a
purchase without his approbation; that if he would therefore intrust me
with the watch, I would consult Mr. Dalton and give him (Mr. Gudgeon,) a
decisive answer the next morning: this he declared himself willing to do,
on which I took both the watch and my leave together, and returned home.

The next morning I attended the office as usual, but of course took no
notice to Mr. Dalton of the affair in hand. During the space of time I
allotted myself for dinner, I again called on Mr. Gudgeon, and told him
that I should keep the watch, provided he would receive the payment by
instalments, as I could not afford to pay the whole price at once. I
therefore proposed to give him the ensuing Saturday, one or two guineas,
as I should find most convenient, and to pay him half-a-guinea a week
afterwards, until the whole was liquidated. To this he readily agreed,
and having fitted a key to the watch, he begged leave to shew me some
chains and seals. Of the former he had none but gilt ones: I selected
one of the neatest, and a handsome gold seal. I then desired to have a
bill of parcels of the whole, observing that whenever I paid a sum upon
account, Mr. Gudgeon could make a memorandum of it at the bottom by way
of receipt. Having obtained this, I departed, promising to be punctual
in paying my first instalment on the day appointed. This took place
on Tuesday, the portmanteau being now on its way to London; and the
same evening I quitted my lodgings privately, leaving nothing behind
but a trunk, containing brickbats and stones, and walked by moonlight
to a village four miles distant, through which the stage-coach was to
pass the next morning at 7 o’clock. I procured some supper at a decent
public-house, and retired to rest, desiring to be called in time for
the coach. At the expected hour the stage made its appearance, in which
I seated myself, and about eight the same evening, arrived at the Blue
Boar, just two hours after the waggon, which I perceived standing in the
yard.

As soon as I descended from the coach, I walked into the coach-office,
and inquired of the book-keeper, if the Bury waggon was arrived; he
replying that it was, I told him that I expected a trunk, and on my
describing the direction, he looked over the way-bill, and informed me
there was such an article, but the waggon would not be unladen till the
next morning, when I might obtain it by application. I now retired to
the Cross Keys in Gracechurch-street, where I procured a bed; the next
morning, having breakfasted, I repaired to the Blue Boar, where I had the
pleasure of finding the waggon unloaded; and boldly entering the office,
I inquired if I could have the trunk I had applied for the night before.
The clerk recollecting me, searched for and found it immediately; and
placing it on the counter, demanded a trifling sum for carriage. While
I was joyfully opening my purse to pay this demand, the book-keeper,
seeming to recollect himself, after a short apology, told me it was not
customary with him to deliver goods to a stranger, without he was shewn
a letter or other authority to warrant such delivery, as so many frauds
had been practised upon inn keepers of late. I affected to be a little
displeased at his suspicion, but acknowledging the justice of such
precautions, I assured him I had received a letter of advice from Bury,
but I doubted whether I had it about me, then pulling out my pocket-book,
hastily turned over a number of papers, and pretending to be a little
concerned at my want of thought, informed the clerk that I had left
the letter at home, and must therefore suffer him to send the trunk to
Cecil-street, although it would occasion an expense for porterage which
I intended to have saved; then repeating my vexation, and carelessly
arranging the pocket-book, I luckily found the identical letter, which
I had (as I pretended) overlooked in my haste. I now drew it forth in
triumph, and obliquely hinting how incapable I was of a fraudulent action
was opening the letter to shew him the contents; but this cautious person
took me aback a second time, by observing that it was unnecessary to
peruse the letter, all that he required was to see the post-mark! This
was a difficulty of which I had not the least idea, and was therefore
unprepared to meet it, and I have often since wondered that my confusion
did not betray me; but I had sufficient presence of mind to answer with a
smile, that I could account for the absence of a post-mark, by informing
him that I received this letter enclosed in a frank or envelope, which
I had destroyed. This satisfied him, and having read a few lines of the
letter, he delivered the trunk, which I brought away from the inn, and
having called a coach was driven to Aldersgate-street, where I was set
down at the end of a narrow court or passage, leading to West-Smithfield;
through this court I proceeded on foot to prevent my being traced, as no
person could follow me without my perceiving it. Being now out of danger
I took another coach in Smithfield, and was carried to my friend the
pawnbroker’s, to whom I had consigned my effects from Bury; but on my
way, I purchased a handsome large trunk, capable of containing the whole
of my property, including the contents of Mr. Dalton’s portmanteau. The
latter (on arriving at the pawnbroker’s) I removed into my new trunk,
and presented my friend with the portmanteau; then arranging also the
contents of my various parcels, and paying him for the carriage, _&c._, I
left my trunk in his care, until I had procured a lodging, which was the
next object I had in view.

I could not help applauding myself on the dexterity with which I had
accomplished this latter adventure, as well as on the general success of
my expedition to Suffolk, on which I had been absent from London exactly
nine weeks. And when it is considered that I was then but just turned of
seventeen years old, the reader must allow that I displayed a genius and
abilities which, had they been devoted to more honourable purposes, would
have done me no small credit. But I am now writing my “Confessions,” and
shall therefore not attempt to palliate my faults at the expense of my
veracity.




CHAPTER X.

    _Live gaily for a few weeks on the Spoils of my late
    Excursion.—Again obliged to seek Employment.—Engage with
    a Conveyancer in the Temple.—Apprehended by my late
    Master.—Compromise the Affair through the Friendship of a
    Relation._


I went immediately in quest of a lodging, and found one to my mind in
Roll’s Buildings, Fetter-Lane; but as this was a respectable house, the
landlady required a reference to character, before she would admit me as
a lodger. I therefore gave her the address of my friend and relation Mr.
Presland, whom I formerly served in Lincoln’s Inn. That gentleman having
satisfied her inquiries, I removed my baggage from the pawnbroker’s, and
took possession of my new apartment.

The next day I examined the contents of Mr. Dalton’s portmanteau,
and found the whole of the articles to be as he had described them,
nearly new, and all excellent in their kind. As I was not at this time
acquainted with a _Fence_[16], to whom I could dispose of this property,
I had no other means of turning them into money, than by pledging them
at different pawnbrokers, which I did, one or two at a time, for as much
as I could get, taking out with me every morning three or four articles
in a bundle, so that in a few days I had obtained money for the whole.

I had now a good stock of clothes of my own, a handsome watch in my
pocket, and some pounds in money, exclusive of the daily supplies I
derived from pledging Mr. Dalton’s apparel: I therefore began to enjoy
myself in the course of life in which I always found the greatest
satisfaction; breakfasting at a coffee-house, dining at a tavern, and
taking my tea in the neighbourhood of the theatres, to one of which I
went almost every night. In the intervals of these occupations, I amused
myself in walking about town, or viewing public exhibitions, but chiefly
in reading books of entertainment and instruction, to the purchase of
which, especially periodical works, I every day devoted a small sum: so
that upon the whole, though I obtained my money by dishonourable means,
yet the manner in which I spent my life was harmless to myself; nor did I
ever, in the most vicious part of my subsequent career, give myself up to
debauchery or intoxication, the idea of which always disgusted me.

In this manner I lived happily for about five or six weeks, when finding
my ready money nearly exhausted, I judged it expedient to look out for
some employment which might contribute to my support. I therefore
made inquiry among the law offices, and was referred to Mr. Preston,
an eminent conveyancer in King’s Bench Walk, who engaged me as a
transcribing clerk at a guinea a week. I attended the office from ten
till five daily, and spent my evenings in rational recreation. I must
here observe that the office of Mr. Preston was within two doors of the
chambers of Messrs. Dalton and Edwards, the latter of whom had engaged me
for the Bury expedition; and it was certainly an act of impolicy in me to
accept a situation so immediately contiguous, after the manner in which
I had behaved to Mr. Dalton, as it was highly probable the latter would
write to Mr. Edwards, and desire him to use means for my apprehension.
However this never once struck me, or if it did, I thought it possible
that I might, in a place so constantly thronged with passengers, go and
come unobserved by him a thousand times. In addition to this, I had never
been seen by Mr. Edwards but in that one interview, which lasted but half
an hour; and I had assumed on that occasion, the name of Smith, whereas I
had now resumed my own. But fate had decreed that I should suffer for my
want of caution, and thus it happened.

In going to and from the office of Mr. Preston, I passed commonly four
times a day by the chambers of Dalton and Edwards, but the avenue in
front of the latter being very extensive, I always contrived to give
them a wide birth, as the sailors term it, and their chambers being on
the first floor, it was not likely that I should be observed, who was
so much below them, and surrounded by numbers of persons continually
passing. It happened, however, that my way to and from the office,
lay through a narrow passage called Mitre Court, leading into Fleet
Street. In this passage I frequently encountered a young man having the
appearance of a lawyer’s clerk, whose face I thought I was familiar with;
and he, on his part, always looked earnestly at me. As this was by no
means uncommon amongst young men similarly employed, I concluded he had
known me by sight, during my service in a former office, and therefore
paid no attention to the circumstance.

One morning, about nine weeks after my return from Bury, I entered
the office at the usual hour, and I had scarcely taken my seat at the
desk, when Mr. Preston opening the door of his own apartment, which was
immediately adjoining that in which the clerks wrote, desired me to
step into his room, which I should not have thought extraordinary, had
not he at the same moment placed himself between me and the outer door
leading to the street, and made a motion with his hand for me to walk
in first: I had, therefore, no alternative, but entered the room. Mr.
Preston followed, and, immediately shutting the door, locked it after
him; upon which I turned my head, and saw, to my no small surprise and
confusion, Mr. Dalton himself from Bury St. Edmund’s. That gentleman
advanced towards me, and began to reproach me in strong terms for my
misconduct; then seeing the chain of my watch hanging out, he immediately
drew it from my fob, saying that he should restore it to the person whom
I had defrauded of it. He next desired to know what I had done with
his trunk of clothes: at first I maintained a sullen silence, and then
denied any knowledge of his meaning: upon which he assured me that he had
strong proofs; that if I did not restore them he would prosecute, and
transport me at the least; but that it was probable I should be hanged
for forging a post-mark to the letter; for that the book-keeper at the
Blue Boar would swear to my person, and that I had shewn him a post-mark
which induced him to deliver the portmanteau. I smiled at the latter
part of this threat, knowing the law too well to be intimidated by it;
but upon Mr. Dalton observing that he knew where I lodged, and doubted
not of finding traces of the property, on searching my apartment, I gave
myself up for lost, as I had imprudently preserved all the duplicates of
the articles pledged, which were now deposited in my bureau. I, however,
continued mute, and Mr. Dalton requested Mr. Preston to send one of his
clerks for a constable; on the arrival of whom, he gave me in charge,
and, accompanied by both gentlemen, I walked to my lodgings, the young
man I formerly mentioned (who proved to be a clerk to Messrs. Dalton
and Edwards, and who, as well as Mr. Edwards, were also sent for by Mr.
Preston,) leading the way.

I afterwards ascertained that Mr. Dalton having, on my elopement, come to
a knowledge of the frauds I had practised on the Bury tradesmen, and by
some accident found out that his trunk had not been received by Mr. Lyne,
had written to Mr. Edwards an account of the whole, and that his clerk
having recollected my person, had watched me home a few days before;
and Mr. Dalton having then been summoned to town, had arrived that very
morning, and proceeded to apprehend me.

Having entered my apartment, Mr. Dalton demanded my keys, which, as
I found it useless longer to dissimulate, I gave up, and my drawers
being searched, the unlucky duplicates were immediately found, and in
my trunk two or three articles of apparel, which I had intended to
have had altered for my own wear, and which Mr. Dalton identified. I
therefore confessed the truth, and that those duplicates would lead to
the recovery of all the property, except the uniform, which I had sold to
a Jew, (in the street I said, but this was because I would not implicate
the man, who kept a respectable sale-shop near Covent-garden,) and the
portmanteau itself, which I told him I had destroyed. Mr. Dalton had now
some conversation with the constable apart, the result of which was,
that the latter was ordered to retain me in custody; and this officer
pretending to pity my youth, and to wish, if possible, that the affair
might be compromised without public disgrace, offered to confine me in
his own house, which was in Chancery-lane, till Mr. Dalton had considered
further on the subject. This having been agreed to, I accompanied the
constable to his house, where I had an apartment assigned me, and was
left (like Captain Macheath,) to my private meditations: these, it may be
conjectured, were not the most agreeable, as this was the first time of
my ever being “in durance vile.”

I heard no more of Mr. Dalton till the next morning, when I was not a
little surprised to see him accompanied by my friend Mr. Presland. It
seems that the former, prior to his apprehending me, had an interview
with my landlady in Roll’s buildings, and had learnt from her, that she
had obtained a character of me from the latter gentleman, on my taking
her apartments. Mr. Dalton in consequence, after consigning me to the
constable’s care, had waited on Mr. Presland, and informed him of the
disgraceful situation in which I was then placed. The result of their
interview was the visit I am now going to describe. Mr. Presland, after
expressing his concern at the state in which he saw me, and his anxious
wish to save me from the disgrace of a public prosecution, inquired
if I could undertake to recover the whole of Mr. Dalton’s property,
in case I was furnished with pecuniary means; on my answering in the
affirmative, (with the exceptions before mentioned,) this truly generous
friend told me that Mr. Dalton had consented to forego a prosecution,
provided he had his property restored, and was reimbursed the expenses
of his journey to London and back again; and that, from motives of
regard for the credit of our family, he, Mr. Presland, had agreed to
disburse a sum of money adequate to the occasion, and would trust to
the chance of being repaid by my relations at some future period, when
he had broke the matter to them in as delicate a manner as possible. He
added, that he trusted my future conduct would never again place me in so
perilous and dishonourable a situation. I, of course, expressed the most
heartfelt gratitude for such an act of unmerited generosity, and it was
settled that the constable should immediately attend me to the different
pawnbrokers’ at which the articles were pledged, for the purpose of
redeeming them. I was accordingly supplied with money by Mr. Presland,
and having received the duplicates, we set out on our expedition. As I
had pledged the property in various parts of the town, and some of them
very remote, this task occupied three whole days, during which time I
dieted and lodged at the constable’s house, my kind relation having
become responsible for every expense. The whole of the articles pledged
having been redeemed, were restored to Mr. Dalton, and Mr. Presland
indemnified that gentleman for those which were irrecoverable. The
aggregate of the expense incurred on this occasion, including principal
and interest to the pawnbrokers, expenses to Mr. Dalton, and compensation
to the constable for his attendance, amounted to upwards of thirty
pounds. Every thing being finally settled, I was seriously admonished
by Mr. Presland, who, on my enlargement from custody, presented me with
five guineas, and made me promise that I would immediately set out for
S⸺shire, and endeavour to obtain an appointment in the country; being
much afraid, he said, that if I continued in town, my total ruin would be
the inevitable consequence.




CHAPTER XI.

    _Obtain an Employment as Clerk and Shopman.—Rob my Employers,
    and embezzle several sums of Money.—Quit this Service, and am
    soon after taken in custody, and committed to the Bastille[17]._


Notwithstanding the promise I had given Mr. Presland, I could not
reconcile myself to the S⸺shire journey; the shame I felt at having
quitted my honourable station in the navy, as well as some other
reasons, and perhaps, above all, the unavoidable destiny which awaited
me, concurred to prevent my taking the salutary advice of my worthy and
respected friend. Having, therefore, privately changed my place of abode,
I began to consider how I should procure another employment in town, and
for this purpose I carefully examined the advertisements in the daily
papers, my intention being now to enter into a mercantile clerkship, or
to engage as assistant in a retail shop, hoping thereby (with shame I
confess it,) to have a better opportunity of realizing money by fraud or
robbery, than I could expect in the restricted capacity of an attorney’s
clerk.

At length I met with an advertisement, stating that a young man who
had a general knowledge of business, was wanted in a retail shop, but
particularly requiring an undeniable character for honesty, _&c._ This
latter clause seemed to promise some difficulty, as I knew not where
to give a reference, except among the lawyers, and I was fearful that
I should not be approved of, if it was known that I had been chiefly
employed in that profession. However, as I knew myself to have a talent
for business, and that I should soon acquire an insight, let the branch
be what it would, I determined to have recourse to stratagem, to surmount
the obstacle of a recommendation.

I therefore obtained a reference to the advertiser Mr. Giffard, who kept
a large masquerade and habit warehouse in Tavistock-street. This person,
who was a grave elderly man, inquired in what capacity, and with whom
I had been last employed; being prepared for this question, I answered
that I had lived for the last two years with Mr. Drake, a general
shopkeeper in High-street, Portsmouth; and that, in consequence of a
family misfortune, my late master had declined business, and retired upon
his means: that this was the only cause of my being out of employment,
and that Mr. Drake had promised to answer any gentleman who might refer
to him as to my abilities and moral character. I added, that having
formerly lived in London with my parents, I had still a sufficient
knowledge of the town, to render myself useful to my employer. After a
few more questions, which I answered with becoming modesty and propriety,
Mr. Giffard told me he liked my appearance well, that he would write
that evening to Mr. Drake, and ordered that I should call again in two
days’ time, when, if he approved of the answer he received, he would
immediately engage me.

Having proceeded thus far before the wind, I had now to take measures
for bringing my plot to a happy conclusion. My next object was to obtain
possession of Mr. Giffard’s letter, in order that I might answer it
myself, Mr. Drake being a person who existed only in my inventive brain:
this I accomplished in the following manner. I found out the guard of the
Portsmouth mail-coach, who was to quit London that evening, and return to
town the next day but one. I obtained the ear of this man, by inviting
him to partake of some brandy and water, and then introduced my business
by acquainting him that my name was Drake, that I had lately resided
in Portsmouth, and that I had reason to suppose there was one or more
letters lying at the post-office in that town for me, as I knew no such
person was now to be found in High-street; I therefore requested that he
would, on his arrival, make inquiry for such letters, and bring any he
might find safe to me on his return, promising a gratification for his
trouble: this commission he readily undertook, and we then separated.

On the day appointed, I met my trusty agent, who delivered me the
expected letter, for which I amply rewarded him. On perusing this
epistle, it was such as might be expected on the like occasion, Mr.
Giffard concluding his inquiries with wishing to know, if the applicant
John Smith (which name I had now assumed,) was in every respect fit
to be received into a respectable house. I had now half accomplished
the business, and it only remained to return a suitable answer through
the regular channel; but to save appearances, and gain time, I waited
immediately on Mr. Giffard desiring to know if he had received a reply
from Mr. Drake. On his answering in the negative, I expressed much
surprise, but accounted for it, by informing him that Mr. Drake was
probably absent from home, on a visit to some relations a few miles
distant, and that on his return, he would not fail to transmit an answer.
Having thus satisfied Mr. Giffard, I departed, promising to wait on him
every day until the expected letter arrived.

I now applied myself to frame an answer, which I at length completed to
my satisfaction, having disguised my hand-writing as much as possible.
In this letter, I made Mr. Drake apologize for his delay, by stating
that he was from home when Mr. Giffard’s favour arrived, and had taken
up his pen the moment it came to hand, to answer his inquiries; that he
felt happy at hearing the young man was likely to obtain so respectable
a situation, and it gave him the highest gratification to bear testimony
to his exemplary conduct on all occasions, while he had been in his
service; that his abilities were such as could not fail to render him an
acquisition, and that he should not himself have parted with him on any
account, had he not, for private reasons, declined business. Finally, Mr.
Drake declared himself glad that I had so soon met with a situation, as
London was a bad place for a young person to be long out of employment,
_&c._

Having finished this epistle, and directed it in due form, I hastened
to find out the driver of the mail-coach, as I did not choose to employ
the guard on this occasion. I requested the coachman to take this letter
to Portsmouth, and on his arrival to drop it in the post-office, giving
some fictitious reason, which fully satisfied him, when backed by a small
compliment in silver.

I continued to call every morning on Mr. Giffard, and expressed such
well-feigned sorrow at Mr. Drake’s delay, that I really believe the
former would in a few days more have taken me without the required
testimonials. However, the long expected answer at length arrived;
and on my calling as usual, Mr. Giffard told me with great marks of
pleasure, that he had just received a letter from Mr. Drake, who gave
me so excellent a character, that I might come that very day if I was
prepared. Mr. Giffard further informed me that he was on the point
himself of leaving the business to the management of his two partners,
(Fisher and Pettit) and should retire to a country-house he possessed at
Hammersmith: that as one of these partners only resided in the house, and
he was a bachelor, it would be necessary that I should board myself, for
which expense I should be allowed fifteen shillings a week, and for my
services twelve more. Though this allowance was comparatively trifling, I
agreed to the terms, as my only intention was to purloin all I could lay
my hands on, and in two or three months to abscond, and change the scene
of action. As to my duty, it was to attend the shop, to make out bills
of parcels, keep a set of books, and occasionally to carry out light
packages.

I immediately brought my trunk of clothes, _&c._, to the house, and had
a small bureau bedstead assigned me in a little room behind the shop;
in which room during the day, a number of young women were employed in
making up fancy-habits, character-dresses, dominos, _&c._ In a few days
Mr. Giffard, with his family, left the house, and there only remained
Mr. Pettit, the junior partner, myself, and a woman servant. The second
partner (Fisher,) was a tailor, who superintended thirty or forty men,
constantly employed in a large workshop on the attic story, in making
gentlemen’s clothes, and ladies’ riding-habits. The stair-case to the
upper apartments communicated with the shop, and had a door at the
bottom, which when Mr. Pettit and the servant were gone to bed, I could
fasten with a bolt so as to leave me at liberty to range the shop, and
examine every part of its contents. Of this opportunity I soon availed
myself, and the keys of the various drawers, _&c._, being left below, I
proceeded to reconnoitre the different articles they contained.

I found these to consist of black and white lace, of various breadths and
descriptions; ribands, silk, and other haberdashery; a large quantity
of mode, Persians, gauze, muslin, _&c._ _&c._ There were also masks and
dominos of every kind for the purpose of hire on masquerade nights,
but these articles were of no value to me. As to the cloths, and other
materials for gentlemen’s clothes, these were always sent for, together
with the requisite trimmings, from various shops in the neighbourhood,
at which tailors are supplied with such goods, as they have need of
them; and it frequently fell to my lot to fetch these articles, on
which occasion I had only to take the pattern-books, and point out the
quantities of each kind wanted, when (after it was known that I lived
with Giffard and Co.) the same was immediately measured, booked, and
given to me.

Having found out a Jew salesman resident in the neighbourhood, who agreed
to purchase whatever goods I brought to him, I began my depredations by
taking a piece of elegant black mode, and several cards of lace, which
articles I concealed in my bedstead, until I went out to breakfast the
ensuing morning, when (this being the winter season,) I buttoned them
up under my great-coat so as not to be perceived. On going to the Jew
receiver, this conscientious Israelite, who no doubt suspected how I had
obtained these articles, and my ignorance of their real value, offered me
a guinea for each card of lace, (containing above twenty yards,) which
was probably about the selling price of a single yard; and an equally
equitable price for the mode; protesting “as he was an honest man, _and
hoped for shalvation_,” that he could not afford sixpence more. As I had
no alternative, I was obliged to accept the proffered sum, and promised
to let him have more goods of the same kind, at every opportunity. I
continued this course of pillage for several weeks, taking care, however,
not to meddle too freely with any one species of property, so as to cause
a discovery. As to money, I had not the means of getting any, for there
was very little retail trade in this shop; and that little was confined
to a few persons of fashion, who came in their carriages, and were always
waited on by Mr. Pettit; besides this class of persons seldom pay ready
money for the articles they select, but have them booked. The various
goods I have mentioned, were chiefly kept for the purpose of making up,
and ornamenting the masquerade and fancy-dresses, which were from time
to time bespoke for extraordinary occasions.

I was frequently sent home with a suit of clothes, a lady’s-habit, and
other articles, to the houses of regular customers; most of whom kept
an accompt, which was settled once a year: but on many occasions I was
desired by the parties to give a receipt and take the amount of the
goods delivered. After being about two months with Messrs. Giffard and
Co., I began to form the design of quitting their service, and from that
moment I suppressed all such sums as I received, booking the articles
on my return, for the satisfaction of Mr. Pettit, who conducted this
department. I now bespoke a very large chest of a neighbouring carpenter,
for the purpose of depositing my own clothes and other effects, which
I knew must be removed by degrees from the house; and that whenever I
absconded, I must leave my trunk behind me. I therefore had recourse
to the old stratagem of substituting brickbats for the articles I took
away, to prevent any suspicion from its lightness. When my chest was
completed, I ordered it to be sent home to a lodging I had provided
in a distant part of the town, of which I had obtained the key, and
paid rent in advance. I removed my effects at every opportunity from
Tavistock-street, to this new receptacle. Every thing being in readiness
for an elopement, I prepared to execute my last design upon my present
employers. I have before observed that I kept a set of books, in which
were the accounts of many persons of fashion for clothes, _&c._ My
intention was to transcribe from the ledger a number of these accounts
upon the copper-plate bills of parcels, which I had in my desk, belonging
to the firm, and to present these bills for payment, immediately after I
quitted the house; not doubting but many of the parties would pay them
on the first application, by which I hoped to realize a good round sum.
But circumstances not favouring this part of my design, I had only an
opportunity of transcribing five or six persons’ bills before Saturday
night, at which period the books were delivered up to Mr. Pettit, who
uniformly retained them until Monday morning; and, as I had reason to
fear my repeated depredations on the shop would soon excite suspicion, I
had pre-determined to quit on the day last mentioned.

The last commission I received on the Saturday was to take a parcel,
containing a riding-habit, to the Bell and Crown inn, Holborn, where
I was to see it booked for the Clapham stage, at which place the lady
resided, for whom it was made. As I was going along, it occurred to me
that I might as well embezzle this article, the price of which to the
lady was 5_l._ 15_s._ 6_d._ Instead, therefore, of going to the Bell and
Crown, I took it to my old acquaintance the Jew, who, I expected, would
give me at least two guineas for it; but he had the conscience to offer
me one pound, which I considered so unfair a price that I refused to
let him have it, and, leaving his shop, I proceeded to a pawnbroker’s
a few doors further, where I requested two guineas upon it; but the
shopman assured me these articles were so liable to the caprice of the
fashion, that it might scarce be saleable at all in a year’s time, except
to convert to some other use; he therefore offered to lend me thirty
shillings, which I accepted, to save further trouble. This was the most
imprudent act I could have been guilty of, as this pawnbroker’s was in
Drury-lane, and within a minute’s walk of my employer’s; and I had better
have taken ten shillings from the Jew, where it would have been placed
beyond the reach of discovery, than have pledged it for five times the
sum. The consequence of this imprudence will be seen by-and-by.

On my return to Tavistock-street, I informed Mr. Pettit that I had seen
the parcel safely booked. The same night after he had retired to bed, I
selected a few of the most eligible articles in the shop as my farewell
adventure, which I concealed in my bed till the next morning, Sunday,
when I conveyed them to the usual place of disposal.

Monday being come, I attended in the shop till the hour of breakfast,
when I went out as usual, but with no intention of returning. I had
previously procured several patterns of fancy quilting for waistcoats,
and of the most fashionable articles for breeches; with these I
immediately went to the houses, at which we were usually furnished with
such goods, and shewing my patterns, (my person being well known,) I was
immediately supplied with what I asked for, and the articles booked to
Messrs. Giffard and Co. I proceeded in like manner to a woollen-draper’s,
where I obtained a few yards of superfine cloth; and afterwards to a
trimming and button warehouse, at which I procured suitable materials for
making up the whole, as I intended these articles for my own wear. All
this was executed within the hour I usually allotted for breakfast.

I next visited my lodging, and, depositing my newly-acquired property in
my chest, informed the landlady I should come to sleep in the apartment
that night. Having taken some breakfast, I hastened to present my bills
at the West end of the town, and was so fortunate as to receive about
twenty pounds, besides an order at another house to call again the next
day, which, as I had no immediate danger to apprehend, I, in fact, did,
and received a few pounds more. For the whole of these sums, I gave
receipts on account of Messrs. Giffard and Co.

Thus ended my engagement with Mr. Giffard, after a duration of about ten
weeks. I was now possessed of a pretty good stock of clothes, and about
sixty pounds in money. I had lived well during the whole period of my
service; and I now determined to enjoy every amusement the town afforded,
as I had lately been debarred from attending the theatres, _&c._ on
account of my being restricted to early hours.

About a fortnight after my quitting Tavistock-street, I called at the
pawnbroker’s, at which I had pledged the riding-habit, for the purpose of
buying some fancy silk-handkerchiefs, of which they had a very extensive
assortment, being unredeemed pledges. On entering the shop, I found it
very full of people, (this being Saturday evening,) and the shopman
desired I would wait a short time, and he would then attend to me. In
a few minutes I heard the latter desire an apprentice to take a bag
and go to a neighbouring liquor-shop, for the purpose of procuring ten
pounds worth of silver. I thought I perceived something significant in
the shopman’s manner of giving these directions, but as nothing is more
common than such a proceeding on a Saturday night, when the pawnbrokers
have need of a great deal of change, I had no apprehension of any deceit.
When I began to grow impatient, the young man at length sent a boy up
stairs to bring down the handkerchiefs, for my inspection; finding,
however, that he was in no hurry to descend with them, and conceiving
at last, that I was only kept in suspense for some sinister purpose,
I declared that I would wait no longer, but call again another time.
Turning about to leave the shop, who should I encounter at the door,
to my great confusion, but my late master, Mr. Pettit, accompanied by
a Bow-street officer, and the boy who had pretended to go out for the
silver. I attempted to rush by them, but was overpowered and secured.
The officer immediately proceeded to search me, but found nothing of
a suspicious nature: he took, however, some loose money, and every
other article I had about me; luckily I had some money (the bulk of my
fortune,) in a private pocket, which he did not discover. Mr. Pettit
then asked the pawnbroker if I was the person who had pledged the habit,
and on his answering in the affirmative, I was given in charge to the
officer, who conducted me to Covent-garden watch-house, where I was
to remain locked up until the magistrate sat in the evening, at the
public-office, Bow-street.

Shortly after my confinement, I received a visit from Mr. Pettit, who,
after expatiating on the enormity of my conduct, told me he had detected
the frauds I had practised at the neighbouring shops, and demanded what
I had done with the property so obtained. This, however, I refused to
tell, not supposing that he had any idea of my place of abode: but in
this I found myself unhappily mistaken, for he informed me that he had
discovered it by means of the porter employed to carry home my chest,
who, it seems, was well acquainted with Mr. Pettit, and had seen me
frequently in his shop. On receiving this unwelcome information, I told
Mr. Pettit to take what steps he pleased; and refused to answer any
interrogatories, which I knew would avail me nothing, without a full
restitution, which I was unable to make.

About six o’clock I was taken before the sitting magistrate, and Mr.
Pettit, being duly sworn, related the whole story of the riding-habit,
and stated that a few days after my elopement, he was surprised at
receiving a message from the lady, respecting the delay in sending it
home; and having inquired at the office of the inn, he was assured that
no such parcel had been booked or brought there; that having reason, from
my sudden disappearance, to suspect my honesty, he had made inquiry at
the surrounding pawnbrokers, and had found the habit pledged at the shop
of Mr. Lane, in Drury-lane, who, on his application, had immediately
restored it. The shopman of Mr. Lane deposed, that he had taken in
the article of me, and the magistrate observed that the evidence was
so clear, that nothing now remained but for Mr. Pettit to produce and
identify the property. The latter replied that he had it not in his
possession, having sent it home to the lady, who was urgent to receive
it. At this the magistrate expressed great displeasure, informing the
prosecutor that all he had said was to no purpose, without the property
being produced, and that he was therefore not warranted in committing
me. Then turning to me, he said, “Young man, you have had a very narrow
escape; I hope this will be a warning to you in future. Officer, let the
prisoner be discharged.” My joy at this deliverance was but momentary,
for before I could reach the door of the office, Mr. Pettit acquainted
the magistrate, that he had several other charges of fraud against me,
but the parties were not then in attendance; upon which his worship
ordered me to be detained, and directing that the witnesses should attend
on that day week, ordered my mittimus to be made out, and committed me to
the house of correction for another examination.




CHAPTER XII.

    _Fully committed for Trial.—Acquitted for want of
    Evidence.—Fatal Consequences of consigning a young Person to
    a Jail.—Meet with a fellow Prisoner, who introduces me to the
    Company of professed Thieves.—Live by Fraud and Robbery.—Trip
    to Staines.—Am at length apprehended for what I am innocent of._


On entering the gates of the gloomy receptacle to which I was now
consigned, and which on many accounts has not been unaptly named the
Bastille, the sensations I felt may be more easily conceived than
described. Besides that this was the first prison I had ever entered,
every thing around me had an air of unspeakable horror. After being
viewed and reviewed by the surly Cerberuses of this earthly hell, I was
conducted up some stairs to a long gallery, or passage, six feet wide,
having on either side a number of dismal cells, each about six feet by
nine, formed entirely of stone, but having a small grated window near the
roof, at the further end, which admitted a gloomy light, and overlooked
a yard, in which other prisoners were confined; there was also a similar
grate over the door; but, owing to their height, both these apertures
were very difficult of access. The cells on the other side the passage,
were exactly similar, but overlooking another yard, and the doors were
immediately opposite each other. The only furniture of these dreary
apartments was an iron bedstead, on which were a bed, blanket, and rug,
but all of the coarsest kind. I afterwards found, that by paying an
extravagant price, I might have had better accommodation; but as I had
then only a few days to stop, and I found no want of cleanliness in my
present lodging, I declined the favour. My conductor having given me a
pitcher of water, without vouchsafing a word, locked the door, and left
me in utter darkness. I retired to my homely couch, and having well
refreshed myself before I left the Brown Bear[18], I soon forgot my
misfortunes in the arms of Morpheus, and did not awake till I was roused
by the turnkey, at a late hour in the morning. This personage now behaved
with some little civility, and let me know that if I had any money I
might be supplied with a good breakfast; at the same time tossing upon
my bed a small loaf (about fourteen ounces,) of bread, which he told
me was the daily allowance of the prison. I gladly accepted his offer,
and desired to have some tea, which was presently sent up to me; and I
continued to have three tolerable good meals, (at least in quantity,)
every day during my stay here; but I paid for each on delivery, and
through the nose.

In order to amuse my mind during this solitary week, I climbed up to
the grated aperture over the door of my cell, and listened to the
conversation of the neighbouring prisoners, who were also confined for
re-examination; and from their discourse I acquired a more extensive
knowledge of the various modes of fraud and robbery, which I now found
were reduced to a regular system, than I should have done in seven
years, had I continued at large. I was indeed astonished at what I
heard, and I clearly perceived that instead of expressing contrition for
their offences, their only consideration was how to proceed with more
safety, but increased vigour, in their future depredations. And here I
was struck with the fallacious notions entertained by the projectors of
this prison, which was reputed to be upon the plan of the benevolent and
immortal Howard, who had recommended the confinement of offenders in
separate cells, in order to prevent the effects of evil communication
among persons who had not all attained an equal degree of depravity.
This object, however, was not effected here, for being within hearing of
each other, they could, by sitting up over the door as I have described,
converse each with his opposite neighbour, and even form a line of
communication, where the discourse became general, from one end of the
gallery to the other. As a proof of what I have advanced, I knew several
of the prisoners then confined with me in this passage, who were at that
time but striplings, and novices in villany, and who after several years’
continuance in their evil courses, at length became notorious offenders,
and having narrowly escaped a shameful death, are now prisoners for life
in this colony.

On the morning of the appointed day, I was again taken to Bow-street,
where I found in attendance Mr. Pettit, and the three shopkeepers from
whom I had obtained the goods. I also saw to my mortification, that
they had searched my lodging, and had actually the various articles so
obtained in their custody, ready to produce. The first person who came
forward, was the woollen-draper’s shopman, who, producing some yards of
cloth and kerseymere, deposed that I had applied for such articles in
the name of Messrs. Giffard and Co., and that having frequently served
me with the like goods, he delivered them to me without hesitation. Mr.
Pettit then denying that I had been deputed by him, or his partner,
and the property being sworn to, the magistrate observed that here was
sufficient matter to convict me, and it was therefore unnecessary to bind
over the other tradesmen, who were ordered to retain their goods. Having
nothing to offer in my defence, his worship ordered the clerk to commit
me for trial, on which I earnestly begged the magistrate to send me to
some other prison, where my friends might have access to me, (this being
denied at the Bastille à la mode de Paris,) and in compliance with my
request, I was ordered to New Prison, Clerkenwell; at which I was much
rejoiced.

On arriving at this prison, of the rules of which I had acquired some
idea, from the information of my late fellow prisoners, who had indeed
advised me to petition as I did, I desired to have the best accommodation
I could, and was therefore called upon to pay fees, garnish, _&c._,
together with two shillings for a bed the first night, but after that,
one shilling only. Having complied with every demand, I was introduced
to a little room adjoining the turnkey’s lodge, where I found several
persons in my own predicament, and some others who were confined for
certain periods. We spent the day together in this part of the prison,
having also free access to the lodge, in which we walked for air, and at
night were locked up in different rooms above stairs, each containing
two or three tolerable beds; so that having society both night and day,
I felt less melancholy than I had done in the house of correction. My
first care was to send for a young man, who, being reputed honest by
the world, I thought I could intrust to arrange matters at my lodgings,
and take care of the effects I left in my apartment. I requested him to
pay the rent due, and remove my chest to his own residence, supplying
me occasionally with such articles as I might need. On his return,
he informed me that he had done everything for the best; but, from
his report, I found that twenty guineas in money, and many of my best
clothes, had taken flight. This he attributed to the officers, who, he
said, had paid several visits to the chest, on pretence of searching by
authority. As I knew how fruitless any complaint would be, I was obliged
to submit to these losses, and thought myself very fortunate in having
thirty pounds about me on my apprehension, which escaped the fangs of the
officer who searched me.

It was about the middle of April when I was taken up, and this being
what is termed long vacation, I had nearly seven weeks to lie in jail,
before the sessions came on. This time I passed in the most agreeable
manner I could, reading sometimes books and newspapers, at others,
smoking, drinking, and conversing with my fellow-prisoners; having all
plenty of money, we formed a pretty respectable mess, and lived on the
most sociable terms. Our society was increased by several new chums
before the sessions, and as these persons were some degrees above the
common class of thieves, I found much satisfaction in their conversation.
There were indeed among them some of the first characters upon the town,
leading men in the various branches of prigging[19] they professed; both
toby-gills[20], buz-gloaks[21], cracksmen[22], _&c._, but from their
good address and respectable appearance, nobody would suspect their real
vocation. As for the unfortunate prisoners, who had no money to pay for
indulgence, they were confined in a large yard, called the common side,
where they were indeed exposed to “variety of wretchedness.” The part I
inhabited was termed “between gates,” being that space which is between
the outer-gate of the prison, and the gate leading to the common-side.

My knowledge of life, as it is termed by the knavish part of mankind,
and my acquaintance with family people[23], every day increased; but,
as all who heard my case concurred with myself in opinion that I had no
chance of escaping conviction, I did not form any intimacy, or devise any
plans beyond the present moment, concluding that I should, at least, be
confined for two years, if not transported for seven.

A week before the Old Bailey sessions, the prisoners were as usual
removed to Newgate; but to my surprise, I was not included in their
number; and I found that my offence being considered a misdemeanour, I
was to be tried at the Quarter sessions held at Hicks’s-hall. For the
reason before-mentioned, I had been advised not to employ a counsel,
which indeed I conceived would be only money thrown away, as the case
was too clear against me. I therefore patiently awaited the issue, and
the day of trial being come, I was taken, with many other prisoners of
both sexes, from the prison to the sessions-house on Clerkenwell-green,
at which Mr. Mainwaring, the member for Middlesex, has for many years
presided as chairman.

Being put to the bar, I stood indicted for knowingly and designedly,
and by false pretences, obtaining from Joseph Addington, five yards
of superfine blue cloth, and three yards of black kerseymere, _&c._
Having pleaded “Not guilty,” the first witness called, was Henry York,
shopman to the prosecutor, who deposed, that on the 7th of April, I
came to his master’s shop, and said I wanted the articles mentioned in
the indictment; and that he, the witness, knowing me well by sight, as
the servant of Messrs. Giffard and Co., and taking for granted that I
was still in their service, immediately cut off, and delivered the same
to me. Here the chairman pressed the witness repeatedly, to state the
exact words that I used; but the man was so evidently embarrassed, (I
suppose from his never being before in a court of justice,) that nothing
more could be extracted from him; he would persist in speaking only in
the third person. “He said he wanted, _&c._” Indeed, to the best of my
recollection, he had sworn exactly the truth; but the reader will soon
see the chairman’s motive for wishing his evidence to be more pointed. I
now felt my hopes revive, and Mr. Pettit being sworn to depose that he
had not empowered me to demand the said goods, which were now produced
and identified, I was put upon my defence, upon which I addressed
the court to the following effect: “May it please your worship, and
gentlemen of the jury, I am here indicted for obtaining goods under
false pretences. From the evidence of the witness York, you hear of no
pretences whatever which I used; he merely swears that I said I wanted
such and such articles, and that he delivered them to me without scruple.
However, I may have been morally culpable, I hope, gentlemen, you will
only be guided in your verdict by the evidence before you, and I humbly
submit that the charge against me has not been formally substantiated.
Gentlemen, I leave my case in your hands, and the question of law to the
learned chairman, who, I am persuaded, will impartially decide thereon.”

The chairman now addressing the jury, spoke as follows: “Gentlemen, I am
sorry, for the ends of public justice, that there is but too much reason
in what the prisoner has advanced; but he is a very young man, and I
sincerely hope that if he this day escapes the correction of the law, he
will never again transgress in a similar way. Gentlemen, the prisoner
is charged in the indictment with falsely obtaining these goods in the
names of William Giffard, Christopher Fisher, and James Orrell Pettit.
Now in the evidence of York, the shopman, we hear not a syllable of such
pretence, or of the prisoner using either of those names, consequently,
the case is not made out, and you must acquit the prisoner.” This they
immediately did, and after an admonition from the chairman, I was
discharged, having first applied for the money, _&c._, taken from me
on my apprehension, which the court ordered to be restored. Mr. Pettit
seemed much chagrined at my escape, and I was in some fear that he would
endeavour to have me detained; but it is probable that he thought it
not worth his while, as he could not hope to obtain any restitution
from me; however, he suffered me to depart in peace, to my great joy. I
have reason to believe that he had not discovered the full extent of my
depredations on his property at this time, and that he had not yet come
to a knowledge of the money I received in payment of bills at the West
end of the town.

On regaining my liberty, my first step was to go in quest of the person
to whose care I had consigned my effects; and who, on pretence of much
business, had abstained for a fortnight past, from visiting me in the
prison. Inquiring at his usual place of abode, I found that he had
quitted his lodging a few days after the period of my apprehension, and
the people of the house knew not where he was gone. I then called at the
printing-office in which he was employed when I first knew him, and there
learnt that he had suddenly absented himself, and was reported to have
engaged with some person of that profession in the country. Every inquiry
I could make was equally fruitless, and I had the mortification to find
that this supposed friend had treacherously converted all my little
property to his own use, without regard to the helpless situation in
which he left me. I had no longer any doubts about the fate of my twenty
guineas, and articles of apparel, which he had persuaded me the officers
must have purloined.

My situation was now deplorable enough; I possessed only the clothes on
my back, and about five pounds in money, the expenses of living, _&c._,
during my confinement, having consumed the rest of my stock. However, I
had regained my freedom, which I little expected, and I consoled myself
with the reflection that I might have been still worse off than I really
was. I engaged a cheap but decent lodging, and furnished myself with such
necessaries as were indispensable for my present comfort, and external
appearance; and I next began to muse upon the course now to be adopted
for my future subsistence.

A few days after my acquittal, I was accosted one afternoon, in
Fleet-street, by a young man, whose face I had some faint recollection
of; while I was considering where I had seen him, he anticipated
me, by asking if I did not remember him in New-prison, where he was
confined on the common side, and had frequently conversed with me
through the gate of the lodge, at which I sometimes amused myself with
viewing the proceedings in the yard below me. This young man was then
only confined till the sessions on a charge of assault, but, being
poor in circumstances, was unable to pay the expenses of admission
“between gates.” I immediately recognised him, and he gave me joy on my
deliverance. He was now very well attired, and invited me to drink a
glass; to which, as I had always found much pleasure in his conversation,
I willingly consented, and accompanied him to a house, called the
White Swan, near Temple-bar. Here my inviter seemed quite at home; he
introduced me to a neat little parlour, in which were a number of persons
smoking their pipes, and drinking wine, punch, _&c._ I observed that my
conductor, whom I shall in future call Bromley, appeared to know and be
known by them all, and that they regarded me with an inquiring eye.

Having taken our seats in a vacant part of the room, our conversation was
at first upon general topics; at length Bromley inquired in a friendly
manner, how I employed myself, and on my answering candidly, that I
really was destitute of employment, and almost of money, he observed
that I was to blame if I wanted money while any body else had any; that
for his part he never would; and that if I would take a walk with him,
I should be welcome; he added that he had that day turned out three
readers[24], but without finding a shilling in either of them; however,
said he, we cannot expect to be always equally lucky. I confess I was
ashamed to own that I had never practised thieving, for (thanks to my
late seven weeks’ education,) I understood his meaning well. I therefore
told him that I had not been accustomed to buzzing, and should be unable
to do my part. On this, Bromley replied that we should have at least
one other person with us, and that he himself would work, while he only
required me and the third man to cover[25] him. Having thus answered my
objection, as I had no scruples of conscience to overcome, I agreed to
accompany him. Shortly afterwards a genteel looking man, advancing to our
table, from among the other company, asked Bromley if he was inclined
for a walk; at the same time looking significantly first at me, then at
my companion. The latter answered, “Yes, sir, with all my heart; this
gentleman is a friend of mine, he’ll take a turn with us: it’s all right:
he’s one of us.” Bromley having discharged our reckoning, we then set
out, and proceeded up Fleet-street, till we observed a crowd of gazers
at the windows of Messrs. Laurie and Whittle, print-sellers. Bromley
immediately joined the throng, we keeping close behind him, wherever he
moved; at length he gave us a sign to cover, and we had scarcely taken
our stations, before Bromley drew back, and pulling the skirt of my coat,
left the crowd, and crossing the way, turned up a court which led into
another street. We followed him close, till he entered a public house,
and we were no sooner in a private room, than Bromley drew from under his
coat a large green pocket-book, which, it seems, he had, unobserved by
me, extracted from the pocket of a gentleman by whose side he stood, when
we advanced to cover him. The book, being opened, was found to contain a
complete set of valuable surgeon’s instruments, some private letters, and
other papers, and in one of the pockets eleven pounds in bank notes; the
money was immediately divided in equal shares, and the stranger observing
that he knew where to fence[26] the book, allowed Bromley and myself five
shillings each on that account. The papers, _&c._, having been committed
to the flames, we then left the house; but my two companions having
observed some police-officers in Fleet-street, deemed it imprudent to
prolong our stay in that quarter, and it being now nearly dusk, at my
request, we all three returned to the White Swan, as I was curious to
know more of the various characters I had seen assembled there.

The seasonable relief my finances had experienced by this adventure,
without any exertion or risk on my part, gave me much satisfaction; and
I thought, to use the words of Mrs. Peachum, in the Beggar’s Opera, that
this was “pretty encouragement for a young beginner.”

It was no sooner dark and the candles lighted, than the room began to
fill apace, and my friend Bromley gave me a description of each person
as he entered, explaining the various branches of prigging, _&c._, in
which they excelled, as well as their good or bad dispositions towards
each other. I recognised among them several faces which I remembered
to have seen at different public places, and even at coffee-houses and
ordinaries, where they intermixed with the best company, and were treated
with every respect.

From this time Bromley and myself became inseparable. This young man
was the son of a respectable master-tailor, and was himself bred to the
same trade. Having formed bad connexions, (the usual root of all evil,)
he had quitted his father’s house about a year before I first knew
him, and associating with “family people,” had since supported himself
by depredation; he was two years older than myself, and his father
considering him irreclaimable, had long since given him up.

For a few weeks we continued to go out[27] with one or other of the
gentlemen frequenting the Swan; and after I had made the first essay,
I became pretty expert in the art of buzzing. Our success was various,
but we managed to live well, and I for my part soon acquired a good
stock of clothes, books, and other comforts, as they were considered
by me. As for Bromley, he was not so good a manager, and when absent
from me, he led a very irregular life, lavishing his money without
discrimination on the most unworthy objects, without taking any thought
for the morrow, so that though our gains were equal, I became every day
richer, while he was seldom master of a guinea beforehand. By degrees
we detached ourselves from the society of those veteran prigs[28],
with whom we had first associated, and not confining our operations
to one branch of depredation, we had recourse to various methods of
getting money. It would be tedious to particularize every species of
fraud and robbery, which we practised in the short space of three
months, at the end of which period, it will be seen that the hand of
justice arrested our further progress; and it is hardly credible, (but
such is the fact,) that during this our limited career, we exercised
alternately the following numerous modes of depredation; which, least
the reader should be unprovided with a cant dictionary, I shall briefly
explain in succession: _viz._, buzzing[29], dragging[30], sneaking[31],
hoisting[32], pinching[33], smashing[34], jumping[35], spanking[36], and
starring[37]; together with the kid-rig[38], the letter-racket[39], the
order-racket[40], and the snuff-racket[41].

In these various exploits, we were sometimes assisted by a third person;
and at others, though very rarely, we formed part of a numerous gang;
but in general we acted by ourselves, and, considering our youth and
inexperience, evinced a good deal of dexterity.

In the month of July, 1800, finding myself inclined for a summer
excursion into the country, I determined on a trip to Plymouth, having
never been in the West of England, and invited my friend Bromley to
accompany me. As we, neither of us, possessed much money, I proposed
to travel in the same manner as I had formerly done, in my Portsmouth
expedition, and to defray our expenses by practising the same imposition,
which I now well knew to be a systematic fraud, known among “family
people” by the title of “the letter-racket.”

We accordingly left town together, equipped with a few indispensables,
contained in a small bundle which we carried alternately, and provided
with a new edition of “Carey’s Itinerary.” Our first resting-place was
Hammersmith, where, in the course of four hours, I realized as many
pounds; my companion in the mean time lying dormant in a public-house,
for in this practice he was not qualified to bear a part; but we intended
to omit no opportunity which might offer of obtaining money by any other
means.

Quitting Hammersmith, we proceeded to Hounslow, where we arrived the
same evening, and reposed for the night. The following day was spent
in collecting from the well-disposed inhabitants of the town, and on
the ensuing morning, we walked to Staines a distance of seven miles.
Arriving at the latter place about one o’clock, we put up at a genteel
public-house, and regaled ourselves with a good dinner. We had just
dined, and were enjoying a pipe, and a bowl of punch, when a respectable
looking old gentleman entered the room, and begged, if it was agreeable,
to take a pipe with us. This being a sort of public parlour, of course
we could have no objection, and we soon entered into familiar chat, the
stranger proving a very pleasant companion. Having passed about an hour
in conversation, I rose, and, apologizing to the old gentleman, told
Bromley I would step out and transact a little business, desiring him to
entertain the stranger until my return. My intention was to visit some
of the most respectable inhabitants with my petition, and Bromley, of
course, well understood my meaning.

On quitting the inn, which was situated in the principal street, and
about the centre of the town, I turned to my right hand, towards London,
proposing to take the houses and shops on that side the street, until I
came to the extremity or entrance of the town, and then to return on the
other side, until I arrived opposite our inn; calculating that this task
would occupy the remainder of that day, and meaning on the next to make a
circuit of the other half of the town.

My first essay was at a watch-maker’s, about six doors from the house
at which we put up. Entering the shop with my letter in my hand, I was
rather surprised at finding no person in attendance, and still more
so, when upon knocking on the counter, not a soul appeared to answer
me. Casting my eyes round, I perceived a door of communication with a
back-room, in which I distinctly heard a child crying, and the voice
of a woman soothing it. There were a number of watches hanging in
the window, and conceiving I ought to profit by this opportunity, I
determined without hesitation to do so. Having, therefore, first slightly
repeated my knock, and then looked up and down the street, in which
(as frequently happens in country towns,) not a creature appeared, I
commenced my depredations. The window, as is usual with watchmakers, was
enclosed with a kind of lattice-work, and there was no means of access
to the watches, but by a small gate, which opened behind the counter.
The attempt was rather hazardous, but the temptation predominated, and
over the counter I jumped. Having entered the little enclosure, I took
down the watch nearest to me, which was a silver one, and put it in my
pocket, then another, also silver, and had just extended my hand towards
a third, which from the colour I supposed to be gold, when lo! to my
utter confusion, the very same old gentleman I had left in the company of
Bromley, advanced to the window, as if passing by; but stopping short,
and looking earnestly towards me for a moment, he suddenly turned round,
and appearing much agitated, retraced his steps as fast as his age would
permit him towards the inn. This transaction was of course momentary, and
I had no time for reflection; but the terror and alarm always consequent
on conscious guilt, operated so strongly upon my mind, that it instantly
struck me the old man had been aware of my depredations, and had hurried
away to give an alarm, and cause my apprehension. My fears were so great
that I had not even power to take down the third watch, but hastened
out of the shop, and on gaining the street, turned to my right hand,
(not daring to return to the inn,) and putting the best foot foremost, I
found myself in a few minutes at the end of the town, and the London road
lying before me. However, as I every moment expected to be pursued and
overtaken, I was afraid to continue in that road; but, availing myself
of the first turning I came to, which was a narrow lane on my right, I
quitted the turnpike road, intending to take a circuitous course, in
order to avoid a pursuit.

It was now about five o’clock, and although I much regretted the
situation in which I had left poor Bromley, who had no money about him,
as I was always purse-bearer, yet I conceived it would be madness in me
to return to Staines, convinced as I was of the danger to which I had
exposed myself. I therefore determined to proceed direct to town, not
doubting that Bromley would find means to extricate himself, and speedily
follow me. I was for some time at a loss to find my way, but meeting a
countryman, he directed me; and after crossing a number of fields, and
scrambling over hedges and ditches, I gained the high road once more, and
pushing forward, stopped at length to refresh myself at a public-house
about five miles from Staines.

It was by this time dusk, and, while I was baiting at this house, one of
the Bath stages luckily stopping at the door, I applied to the coachman
for a passage, and ascending the vehicle, arrived safe at Hyde-park
corner, about nine o’clock the same night.

The following day I was, of course, anxiously solicitous about poor
Bromley. I made inquiry for him at every place he was accustomed to
frequent, but without success, during the whole morning. At length,
about four in the afternoon, as I was walking through Leicester-fields,
I unexpectedly met him, to my great satisfaction. Mutual inquiries
immediately took place; and I was surprised to hear him express the
greatest astonishment at my sudden departure from Staines, for which he
told me he was unable to account. This of course produced an explanation,
when it appeared that nothing whatever had transpired respecting the
robbery I had committed, nor had Bromley seen or heard any more of the
old gentleman after the latter quitted his company, which he did a few
minutes after myself. I must, therefore, have been mistaken in my notion
that he had observed my actions through the watch-maker’s window, of
which, at the moment, I entertained no doubt; so true it is, that a
guilty conscience needs no accuser. What could have occasioned his sudden
retreat, is therefore still a mystery to me.

Bromley then proceeded to inform me, that on finding I did not return
about my usual hour to tea, he began to fear something unpleasant had
happened, and had accordingly taken a walk through the town, in quest
of me; but not succeeding in his object, his astonishment and fears
increased, and both were heightened when bed-time approached without my
appearance. That being willing, however, to hope for the best, he had
supped by himself, and telling the landlady, that he supposed his friend
was detained on business which prevented his return, he had at length
retired to bed. The following morning he renewed his search, and meeting
with no better success, he took French leave of the landlady, suffering
her to retain our common bundle of necessaries, which, indeed, were of
more value than our reckoning could amount to; and quitting Staines about
eight o’clock, the poor fellow had travelled on foot to town, (a distance
of sixteen miles,) having accidentally one shilling in his pocket, which
procured him a breakfast, at the same public-house at which I took the
Bath stage.

Thus ended our projected expedition to Plymouth; for having been so
disappointed in the outset, we had no inclination to make a second
attempt. I sold the two watches for five pounds, and dividing that sum,
as well as the residue of what I had acquired by the “Letter racket,”
with Bromley, we turned our thoughts to other modes of obtaining money.

Soon after my return to London, from Staines, I was one day passing
through Newgate-street, immediately opposite the walls of Newgate,
when observing a grave-looking elderly gentleman, who was walking just
before me, to have a pocket-book in his outside coat-pocket, I made an
attempt to ease him of it; but it being of an unusual size, and rather
ponderous, it slipped from my fingers, and alarmed the gentleman; who,
turning round sharply, and seeing me close behind him, clapped his hand
upon my shoulder, saying very drily, “Holloa! young man, when did you
come to town?” I of course affected to be much surprised, and with a look
of displeasure at his freedom, begged he would explain his meaning. The
stranger staring me full in the face, and smiling sarcastically, pointed
with his finger to the opposite walls; and, in a low voice, said, “You
see that stone building, my pretty youth; mark my words, that will be
your resting-place very soon.”—Then, without suffering me to reply, he
crossed hastily towards Snow-hill, leaving me to reflect at leisure upon
his words, and wonder at the strangeness of this adventure!

This gentleman, one would think, possessed the gift of prophecy; for,
as he had foretold, in less than six weeks after, I actually became an
inmate of Newgate!

On Sunday the 17th of August, 1800, Bromley and myself, after
breakfasting together, agreed to walk into the city; our business there,
being to purchase some base half-guineas and seven-shilling pieces, of
a Jew in Petticoat-lane, Whitechapel. We accordingly set out, and about
one o’clock entered Cheapside, when we observed a great concourse of
people, assembled round the door and windows of a draper’s shop. As is
natural to persons in London, we entered the crowd out of curiosity;
at least that was my sole motive, for I always opposed robbing on the
Sabbath-day: (at which the reader may perhaps smile.)—My partner Bromley,
however, had an eye to business, and I soon perceived by his motions,
that he was scrutinizing the pockets of the spectators. I was, however,
at some distance from him, and signified my dissent by a look; in fact,
I had no sooner ascertained the object of the people’s curiosity, which
was an attempt made in the preceding night, to break the shop open, of
which the shutters bore evident marks, than I beckoned to Bromley, and
made the best of my way out of the crowd. I had no doubt but he would
immediately follow me, and having got clear of the mob, and proceeded
slowly about thirty yards from the spot, on my way towards Whitechapel, I
made a stand, and turned round to see if Bromley was coming. The reader,
(_unless he doubts my veracity_) will judge of my surprise, when I saw
my poor companion, struggling with a man who held him at arm’s length
with one hand, and had in the other a silk handkerchief; at the same time
calling after a person who had also left the crowd, and was proceeding
the contrary way, (towards Saint Paul’s,) “Stop Sir, come back, you’re
robb’d.” The person called to, immediately turned back, and at the same
moment, the fellow who held Bromley, seeing me looking earnestly at the
transaction, exclaimed pointing at me, “Stop him in the blue coat! that’s
the other.” Knowing my innocence, I did not attempt to escape; and a man
now advancing to the spot where I stood, seized me by the collar, and
dragged me back to the crowd. The person said to be robbed, had by this
time returned, and being desired to search if he had lost any thing, did
so, and missed his handkerchief. The man who had apprehended Bromley,
proved to be a turnkey at the Poultry-Compter, and a city constable;
the other, who seized me, was brother to the former, and also a peace
officer, their name, Alderman. These two having now taken the address of
the stranger, who identified the handkerchief, and having desired him
to attend the next day at the Mansion-House, they proceeded to escort
Bromley and myself to the Compter. On arriving at this prison, they
immediately searched us, and took from each of us a silk handkerchief,
a pocket-book, and other articles, all our own property; but unluckily
Bromley had a second handkerchief about him, (I believe a white muslin
one,) which he had worn round his neck the preceding day.—Being now
locked up by ourselves, we had leisure to talk over this unfortunate
affair, and I could not help censuring Bromley for the imprudent act he
had committed, especially where the object was so insignificant. Indeed,
I had frequently, since our connexion, had occasion to blame him for
taking so petty an article as a handkerchief, which, notwithstanding, he
persisted in doing, particularly if it was of a fancy pattern. However,
as there was no recalling the event, it was agreed that he should make
the best defence he could for himself, and deny any knowledge of me,
which, as I was not near him, when he was detected, I conceived would
effectually procure my liberation. Thus, after committing numerous acts
of robbery with impunity, I was at last apprehended for what I had no
more actual concern in, than the reader of the page I am now writing.




CHAPTER XIII.

    _Examined before the Lord Mayor.—Fully committed, tried, and
    cast.—My Father’s Faith and Assurances.—My Disappointment on
    being transported for Seven Years.—Contract the Gaol Distemper,
    and am reduced to the point of Death.—Recover my Health, and am
    sent on Board a Transport for Botany Bay._


The next day, Monday, we were taken to the Mansion-House for examination,
before the Lord Mayor. The owner of the handkerchief being in attendance,
one of the officers acquainted his lordship, that observing both Bromley
and myself to be very busy in the crowd assembled in Cheapside, the
preceding day, and suspecting our designs, he had watched us narrowly,
and at length observed Bromley to take a handkerchief from a gentleman’s
pocket, which he immediately endeavoured to convey to me; but before he
could do so, he, the witness, laid hold of him, and took the handkerchief
from his hand; on which (he stated) I endeavoured to escape, but that he
pointed me out to his brother, who happened to be with him, and desired
him to secure me, while he himself called back the gentleman who had been
robbed, and informed him of the circumstance. (So much for the veracity
of this deponent’s evidence, to which he afterwards deliberately swore!)

His brother corroborated the foregoing account, which he was well
enabled to do, having heard the whole of it; and with this addition,
that in the course of his duty as a city constable, he had seen us daily
perambulating the streets, during the busy hours, and knew us both to be
notorious pickpockets. (This was more wickedly false than all the rest,
for we had never given one of the city officers the least opportunity
to suspect or notice us, but it had the effect they intended; that of
inducing the magistrate and prosecutor to deal more rigidly with us.)
They further swore, that on searching us, they found two pocket-books,
several handkerchiefs, and other suspicious articles, (meaning by these
last, I suppose a small knife, and a pair of scissors, which we each
carried about us,) all which they doubted not to be stolen!

Mr. Dowell, the person they had invited to prosecute us, now deposed
that he was a tradesman living in Chancery-lane; that he knew nothing
of the robbery, but being called back by the first witness, he missed
his pocket-handkerchief, and that the one produced by the officer, he
believed to be his, as it was of the same pattern, but had no mark by
which he could identify it. His lordship then calling upon us for our
defence, Bromley declared that he had picked the handkerchief up in the
crowd, and at the same moment the officer seized him, and charged him
with stealing it; that he was going on his own business at the time of
this affair happening, and that so far from my being in his company, he
never saw me before in his life.

The Lord Mayor appearing to have some pity on our youth, asked Mr. Dowell
if he was determined to prosecute us, hinting at the same time, that he,
(his Lordship) did not wish to urge him to that measure, provided we were
willing to enter into His Majesty’s service, but that he was at liberty
to act as he thought fit. I was in great hopes that Mr. Dowell would
incline to lenity, but the officers took him on one side, and found means
to persuade him that he ought, for the sake of the public, to let the law
take its course. He was thereupon bound over to prosecute, and we were
committed to take our trial at the next Old Bailey Sessions, commencing
the 17th of September. For the present, we were remanded to the Poultry
Compter; there to remain until moving day, that is, the Thursday before
sessions.

As I conceived myself in some danger from the inveterate malice of the
two brothers, I deemed it advisable to take all possible measures for my
deliverance; and it occurred to me, that as I knew no person in London
whom I could depend on as a real friend, I should do well to inform
my father of my situation, and request the aid of his experience, and
personal mediation, in my behalf.—It was now upwards of five years
since I had any intercourse with my parents, further than twice or
thrice calling at their residence, with a formal inquiry after their
health, and sometimes a cold salutation when my father and I met in
the streets: at which times I always avoided any explanation as to my
circumstances, or the mode of life I led; and since my quitting the
navy, I had never exchanged a word with them. I now therefore wrote to
my father, acquainting him with my distress, and begging to see him
without delay. He very soon complied with my request, and I informed him,
(with as much adherence to truth as I thought necessary,) of the cause
of my confinement. My father, who I have before mentioned to have been
unfortunate in his speculations, had been for several years declining in
the world, and notwithstanding his want of affection towards me, I felt
much concern at his decayed appearance. He promised me every assistance
he could render by his personal exertions, but declared his inability to
extend pecuniary aid, the times being at this crisis peculiarly hard,
and every necessary of life daily advancing in price. Fortunately I
had some good clothes, _&c._, and a few pounds in money by me; and my
father, being directed by me, repaired to my lodgings, and secured all
my effects, which he removed to his own house, supplying me occasionally
with such articles or money, as I found myself in need of. My father,
at this period, resided in St. George’s Fields, where he had taken and
furnished a small house, the major part of which he let out in lodgings.
By this expedient, and I believe (under the rose,) a little dabbling in
the lottery, he made a shift to keep the wolf (or rather the bailiff)
from the door. My mother also visited me in the Compter, accompanied by
my two sisters, and shewed me every attention in her power.

Being removed on the usual day to Newgate, I applied myself to draw up a
brief, for the purpose of employing a counsel in behalf of my unfortunate
companion, who had not himself the means of obtaining legal assistance.
As to myself, I conceived nothing but the grossest perjury could induce a
jury to convict me, under the circumstances of my apprehension; knowing
as I do, that in no court in Europe, has a prisoner so much justice shewn
him, or such lenity in a doubtful case, as at the Old Bailey: besides, my
father believing my protestations of innocence, (I mean of all connexion
with Bromley,) would not for a moment entertain a doubt of my acquittal,
and therefore opposed the unnecessary expense of feeing counsel. Having
completed the brief to my satisfaction, I sent it (unknown to my father)
with the usual fee, to Mr. Alley.

Every thing being thus arranged, and a true bill returned by the grand
jury upon the evidence of the officers to the same effect as before,
I was on the 23d of September put to the bar, together with Bromley;
and, as I have so frequently read the printed report of our trial, that
it will never be erased from my memory, I shall give the reader the
substance of the proceedings, which I can do nearly verbatim: and, I
believe upon the whole, a more extraordinary trial has been seldom found
upon record.

                           TRIAL, _&c._

    Alexander Bromley and James Vaux, were indicted for feloniously
    stealing on the 17th of August, a handkerchief, value two
    shillings, the goods of William Dowell, privily from his person.

    To this indictment the prisoners pleaded “Not guilty.”

    Mr. Alley, counsel for Bromley, desired that the witnesses
    might be examined apart, with which request the court complied.

    William Alderman sworn.—“I am a city constable, and turnkey
    of the Poultry Compter. On Sunday the 17th of August, I was
    passing through Cheapside, when observing a crowd of persons
    collected together, I went up to inquire the cause; I there
    saw the two prisoners, and knowing them to be suspicious
    characters, I watched their motions, and presently saw Bromley
    take a handkerchief from the pocket of the prosecutor, which
    he attempted to give to Vaux, but before Vaux could take it
    from him, I seized Bromley with the handkerchief in his hand.”
    (Here witness went on to describe our apprehension, in the same
    terms as he had done before the Lord Mayor). “I can produce
    the handkerchief; I have had it ever since.—On searching the
    prisoners, we found upon them two pocket-books, and several
    handkerchiefs, with other suspicious articles; but the Lord
    Mayor ordered them to be returned, when he committed the
    prisoners for trial.”

    Cross-examined by Mr. Alley.—_Q._ Which of the prisoners took
    the handkerchief?

    _A._ They both had hold of it: the biggest, Vaux, let go
    immediately.

    _Q._ Then you mean to swear they both took it?

    _A._ Yes.

    _Q._ Which pocket was it taken from?

    _A._ The left-hand coat-pocket.

    _Q._ You know there is a reward, if these two poor boys are
    convicted. Was it you that advised the prosecutor to lay this
    indictment capital?

    _A._ The grand jury found the bill. (_Witness ordered to
    withdraw._)

    Thomas Alderman sworn.—“I was with my brother. I saw both the
    prisoners very busy, lifting up the lids of people’s pockets.
    Bromley took a gentleman’s handkerchief, on which my brother
    seized him. I apprehended Vaux. He had got away to some
    distance from the crowd.”

    Cross-examined by Mr. Alley.—_Q._ What are you, Sir?

    _A._ I am a tailor, and a constable of the city.

    _Q._ So you thought you could get more by prosecuting these two
    poor young lads, than by sitting on your shop-board at work?

    _A._ I did my duty.

    _Q._ Who took the handkerchief?

    _A._ Bromley took it out, and Vaux laid hold of the corner, to
    take it from Bromley.

    _Q._ Which pocket was it in, the right or the left?

    _A._ The right-hand pocket[42].

    _Q._ Now, Sir, you know these poor lads are trying for an
    offence, for which they are liable to be hanged, if they are
    convicted: I ask you, upon the oath you have taken, whether you
    ever heard of two persons putting their hands in a man’s pocket
    at once?

    _A._ I never did.

    _Q._ Then if your brother has said so, he has told a lie?

    _A._ That he certainly has. (_A general laugh in the court._)

    [_The handkerchief produced and identified by the prosecutor,
    from its similitude to the one he lost._]

    Bromley called four witnesses, and Vaux two witnesses, who gave
    them a good character.

    Bromley’s defence.—“I picked the handkerchief up in the crowd.”

    Vaux’s defence.—“I am innocent.”

                      Bromley, _Guilty_ (aged 20,)
                       Vaux, _Guilty_ (aged 18,)

           _Of stealing the handkerchief value eleven pence_.

Thus ended this curious trial, to the general dissatisfaction of a
crowded audience, who expressed their sentiments by loud and distinct
murmurs. The jury returned the above verdict, in order to reduce the
offence to a simple felony, by finding the value of the property under
one shilling, stealing from the person to which amount is death. My
father, together with Mr. Kirby, the keeper of Newgate, stood at my elbow
during the whole trial, and both advised me to make the laconic defence
I did. It was their firm belief, that I should be acquitted, and the
result surprised them much. The witnesses to Bromley’s character were
tailors, with whom he had formerly worked; those in my favour, were very
respectable tradesmen, adduced by my father. On leaving the bar, the
latter, as well as Mr. Kirby, comforted me with the assurance, that the
court would only impose a small fine[43] upon us; and my father promised
to use all his interest, and that of his friends with the Recorder,
previous to the latter passing sentence, for which end Mr. Kirby advised
a petition to be immediately prepared. This task I accomplished the next
day, and delivered it to my father for presentation.

Both Bromley and myself (buoyed up by the assurances above-mentioned,)
entertained the fullest hopes that our sentence would be lenient. On
the last day of the session, according to custom, all the prisoners
convicted, were brought into court, to receive judgment. Those capitally
convicted were first put to the bar, and received the awful sentence of
death; after which a few were ordered to be transported for fourteen
years; and then forty persons were called in succession, (among whom were
myself and Bromley,) and being placed at the bar, the whole forty were
collectively sentenced to seven years transportation, beyond the high
seas! This severe doom affected us both in a very great degree. I, for
my part, was inconsolable, and shed tears in abundance. My father, on
visiting me the next day, professed much concern, and would have still
flattered me with hopes of a reverse; but I have since had good reason to
believe, that instead of using his influence in my favour, he secretly
approved of the event, conceiving, I suppose, that sending me out of
the country, might save me from a still worse fate; and, that this was
therefore, (to use the common phrase of parents on such occasions,) the
best thing that could have happened for me.

After the first effects of our grief had subsided, the society of our
fellow-prisoners, and the bustle constantly prevailing in the prison,
soon banished every trace of sorrow, and we became as cheerful as the
best. My father and mother paid me every attention, and the produce of
my own effects was fully adequate to my support for several months: when
that resource failed, my father contributed his mite; and with the help
of another friend or two, I was comparatively comfortable during my
continuance in Newgate. As for Bromley, his father, on hearing his sad
fate, had allotted him a weekly pittance, sufficient, with care, to keep
him above want.

About a month after the close of the session, the gaol being unusually
crowded with prisoners, a most dreadful contagion, called the gaol fever,
made its appearance, and spread so universally, throughout every ward and
division of the prison, that very few escaped its attack. I was one of
the first to contract it, and was immediately carried to the infirmary,
or sick-ward of the prison, where I only remember having my irons taken
off, and being put to bed; for the same night, I became delirious, and
was so dreadfully affected, as to continue insensible for three weeks,
during which time, I had no knowledge of my parents, or of any other
person who approached me; and the fever raged to such a degree, that I
was obliged to be bound in my bed, in order to restrain me from acts of
mischief. My poor companion, Bromley, was attacked about the same time as
myself; and, on recovering my reason, I found him laid in the adjacent
bed to my own, and was informed his sufferings had been equally grievous
with mine. It pleased God, however, to restore us both to perfect health;
but numerous were the unhappy persons who fell victims to this dire
disease.

It is usual to make occasional draughts of convicts under sentence of
transportation, from Newgate to the Hulks at Woolwich, Portsmouth,
_&c._, on board of which receptacles they continue until a ship is in
readiness, to convey them to New South Wales. Few prisoners are suffered
to remain above three months in the prison, after their conviction. A
longer continuance is effected either by bribery or interest. My father,
having heard a shocking account of the Hulks, had waited on Mr. Kirby,
the gaoler, soon after my receiving sentence, and obtained a promise that
I should remain in Newgate, until a ship was on the point of sailing
for this colony; and herein, he was as good as his word.—My father, at
length received a private intimation from Mr. Kirby, that he had no time
to lose in arranging matters for my departure: accordingly, with the
assistance of two or three other friends, my father contrived to pack up
a few of the most necessary comforts for my use on the passage, which he
afterwards sent to Portsmouth by the coach. On the 15th of May, 1801,
my father, mother, and sisters, came to take a final leave of me; there
was something solemn in this scene, which affected me much, though our
mutual regard was not of the most violent nature. I also took leave of
my companion in adversity, who, by what means I know not, still remained
in Newgate, but was shortly after my departure, removed to the hulks at
Portsmouth.—The next morning (May 16th,) at four o’clock, myself, and
thirteen others, who had been all kept back for this opportunity, were
attached together by a strong chain, and escorted by the keeper and his
subordinates to Blackfriars-bridge, where a lighter was in readiness to
receive us, in which we proceeded down the river Thames to Gravesend,
and about noon arrived alongside the Minorca transport, Captain Leith,
bound for Port-Jackson, in company with the Canada and Nile, which ships
were also lying at this anchorage, for the purpose of receiving their
prisoners on board.




CHAPTER XIV.

    _Sail from England.—Account of our Voyage.—Arrive at Port
    Jackson.—Write in my own behalf to Commissary Palmer.—That
    Gentleman is pleased to notice my Application.—Land at Sydney,
    and am carried before Governor King.—A curious Dialogue
    between His Excellency and myself.—Ordered to Hawkesbury, as
    Store-keeper’s Clerk._


Having entered the ship, we were all indiscriminately stripped,
(according to indispensable custom) and were saluted with several
buckets of salt-water, thrown over our heads by a boatswain’s-mate.
After undergoing this watery ordeal, we were compelled to put on a suit
of slop-clothing. Our own apparel, though good in kind, being thrown
overboard. We were then double-ironed, and put between-decks, where we
selected such births, for sleeping, _&c._, as each thought most eligible.
The next day, we received on board forty-six more prisoners, from the
Hulks at Woolwich, and the Canada fifty. The Nile also took on board
one hundred women, from the different gaols in Great Britain. The three
ships then sailed for Spithead, where, on our arrival, the Minorca and
Canada had their numbers augmented, from the Hulks at Portsmouth, to
one hundred men each. Every thing being now in readiness, we only waited
for the convoy to assemble, with which we were to proceed to a certain
latitude.

During this interval, I wrote the first intimation of my unhappy state,
to my dear and honoured grandfather, palliating the facts as much as
possible, and positively denying any criminal connexion between myself
and Bromley. This I did, in order to save those heart-rending pangs,
which I knew my venerable and virtuous benefactors would suffer, if
they had been acquainted with the dissolute life I had for some time
led. In a few days, I received a long and most affectionate letter
from my grandfather, in which he deplored the harshness of my destiny;
but far from aggravating my sufferings by reflections on my manifold
indiscretions, this good old man laboured only to press my resignation to
the dispensations of Providence, and to exhort me, by my future conduct,
to make atonement for the past. He added a great deal of good advice, as
to my behaviour in the degraded state to which I was reduced, concluding
with his blessing, and that of my grandmother, and a most pathetic and
tender farewell.—I had assured my grandfather in my letter, that no
extension of pecuniary aid could at all ameliorate my situation, as I
had a sufficient store of necessary comforts for my voyage: my motive
for this assurance, was, to prevent him from distressing himself still
further in his old age on an object so worthless as myself, by whose
expensive adoption and education, he and the partner of his griefs were
already reduced to a state bordering on indigence, aggravated by mental
anxiety and sorrow for me, the unworthy cause.

On the 21st of June, we sailed from Spithead, in company with about three
hundred sail of merchantmen, bound to various ports, under convoy of
a frigate and a sloop of war. The convoy parted from us soon after we
passed the Canary Islands, and our three ships proceeded in company. A
few days after we put to sea, I was noticed by Captain Leith, to whom I
had (as my grandfather advised me) offered the services of my pen, _&c._
The captain, in consequence, employed me during the voyage in writing his
Log, Journal, and other accompts, and extended to me all the indulgence
my situation would admit of. The latter end of August we arrived at Rio
de Janeiro, where we had every refreshment the place afforded, and, after
a continuance of thirty days, we resumed our voyage. Nothing worthy of
notice occurred therein; our little squadron kept company until we made
the Harbour of Port Jackson, which we did on the 14th of December, and
the same day came to an anchor in Sydney-cove.

Among my fellow-prisoners, was a young man named Calvert, with whom I
had become very intimate. In the course of our passage, this person had
shewn me an open letter of recommendation to John Palmer, Esq., then
Commissary of New South Wales, which was from a particular friend of the
latter gentleman, and pleaded strongly in favour of the bearer. A few
days before our arrival, it occurred to me, that a humble application in
my own behalf to Mr. Palmer might have the effect of obtaining for me
some little distinction, as I heard a most amiable character of him, and
conceived my services might not be unacceptable in his public department.
I therefore wrote a respectful letter, which I consigned to the care of
Captain Leith, who promised not only to deliver it himself, but to speak
in my favour, both to Mr. Palmer and his Excellency the governor.

The second day after our arrival, several gentlemen came on board,
to muster and inspect the prisoners: among the number was Mr. Palmer
himself, who, having received my letter, was pleased to tell me, in the
kindest manner, that he had mentioned me to the Governor, and that I
might accordingly expect a favourable appointment on my landing. The
majority of the prisoners were sent up the country, the day after the
muster, to various kinds of labour, but myself and a few others, were
detained on board until the 19th, on which day we landed at Sydney, and
were immediately conducted to Government-House, in order to be severally
examined and disposed of by Governor King. We were called in succession
for our audience; and, when it came to my turn, I entered the room with
a respectful bow to the gentlemen assembled; for there were seated at
a table, several officers of the colony, besides his Excellency. The
latter, however, I soon distinguished by his manner of addressing me, and
as the particulars of this interview may afford some entertainment to
those who were not acquainted with the eccentric character of Governor
King, I shall give the reader our conversation in dialogue, as near as my
memory will permit.

_Governor._ (Regarding me from head to foot, with a most inquisitive eye,
or rather four eyes, for he wore spectacles, and, with a manner, the very
reverse to encouraging) “Well, Mr. Vaux, what were you sent here for?”

_Vaux._ (Of course a little embarrassed at this unexpected question, so
abruptly put,) “Sir, I had the misfortune to be acquainted with a person
of bad character, who in my company committed”⸺

_Governor._ (Interrupting me impatiently) “But Mr. Vaux, come to the
point at once. I don’t want you to come round here, and then back
again, and round the other way, (drawing circles on the table with his
finger, and all the while staring at me, which indeed he continued to
do as long as I remained in the room, as if determined to put me out
of countenance); recollect, Mr. Vaux, you are not at the bar of the Old
Bailey now. Come to the point, Sir, come to the point. I ask you what you
were sent here for?”

_Vaux._ “Sir, I was charged with picking a gentleman’s pocket, but,
though your Excellency may doubt my assertion, I solemnly assure you, I
was innocent of that fact.”

_Governor._ (with a most satirical smile, and throwing himself back
in his chair) “O, I dare say, Mr. Vaux, very innocent no doubt. Quite
innocent, I dare say. So the long and the short of it is, you were sent
here for picking pockets.”

_Vaux._ “I confess, Sir, that was the charge.”

_Governor._ “What have you been brought up to, Mr. Vaux?”

_Vaux._ “Sir, I have been chiefly employed in the law; but I profess to
be a clerk in general.”

_Governor._ “Pray, Sir, what office were you in last?”

_Vaux._ “Sir, the last gentleman I served was Mr. Preston, in King’s
Bench Walk.”

_Governor._ (With a frown) “That I very much doubt, Sir; that I very much
doubt, Sir; that I very much doubt, Mr. Vaux.”

_Vaux._ “I am sorry your Excellency has so bad an opinion of me; I assure
you, Sir, it is the fact.”

_Governor._ “Well, Mr. Vaux, I shall send you to a place, where your
roguery will very soon be found out.”

_Vaux._ “I hope not, your Excellency; I trust you will have”⸺

_Governor._ (Interrupting) “Well, I hope so too, Mr. Vaux; I hope so too,
I hope so too, Sir; but mind—I only give you a caution; take care of
yourself.”

Then hastily scribbling a few words on a scrap of paper, he handed it
to me, and ordering a light-horseman to attend me, made a motion for
me to withdraw, which I was glad enough to do, in order to be relieved
from this embarrassing examination.—On going out, the horseman informed
me he had orders to see myself and baggage on board the Parramatta
passage-boat; the paper I had received proved to be an order to the
boatman to that effect, and on the reverse was a memorandum, purporting
that I was appointed clerk to Mr. Baker, Store-keeper at Hawkesbury.
Both these documents were signed P. G. K., as was his usual custom; but
the whole so unintelligibly written, that it cost me much pains and
some inquiry to decipher them.—I now took up my little box, and my bed,
and was conducted to the wharf, where I found the boat on the point of
departure. After a pleasant passage, we arrived at Parramatta, at which
place I rested the ensuing day, and, on Monday the 21st, continued my
journey by land to Hawkesbury, a distance of twenty-six miles. On this
occasion I joined a party of travellers, accompanied by a cart in which
I had deposited my luggage; these persons formed a sort of caravan,
and were all well-armed, the natives being at this time in a state of
warfare, and the roads thereby rendered dangerous. Late in the evening
we arrived at Hawkesbury, and being directed to Mr. Baker’s house, I
immediately presented myself and my credentials to that gentleman.




CHAPTER XV.

    _My Conduct at Hawkesbury.—Continue for three Years to give
    Satisfaction to my Principal.—Ordered by Governor King into the
    Secretary’s Office.—Give way to the Temptations with which I am
    surrounded, and begin to lead a dissipated Life in company with
    some other Clerks.—Concert a System of Fraud upon the King’s
    Stores, which we practise successfully for some Time.—The
    Imposition is at length detected.—I am in consequence dismissed
    the Office and sent to hard Labour, for the first Time in my
    Life._


Mr. Baker received me with kindness, and great pleasure, as, my
predecessor having quitted him some weeks before, he was at a loss for a
proper assistant. In a few days I had a comfortable residence assigned me
by the commanding officer of the settlement, and my duty being exempted
from all hard labour, and of such a nature as I found pleasure in
performing, I soon felt myself comparatively happy.—With retrospective
satisfaction, I can truly say, that I behaved in this situation with so
much propriety as to obtain the favour of my principal, and the good
opinion of the resident magistrate, Dr. Arndell, whose four children I
attended at my leisure hours, in the quality of preceptor. Both this
gentleman and Mr. Baker vied with each other, in shewing me every mark
of kindness in their power.—Mr. Baker informed me that Governor King
made frequent and particular inquiries of him respecting my conduct,
and I felt the highest gratification from the reflection that I had
happily falsified his Excellency’s uncharitable prediction as to my real
character. Mr. Palmer also, who had been the first kind promoter of my
good fortune, made similar inquiries of Mr. Baker, and from the report he
received of my talents, expressed a desire to transfer me from Hawkesbury
to the Commissary’s Office at Sydney, in which department there was then
a great press of business, and expert clerks were not, at that period,
so numerous as at present. Mr. Baker, however, being unwilling to part
with me, paid no attention to the wish of Mr. Palmer, until the latter
gentleman at length ordered in direct terms, by an official letter,
that I should be immediately sent to Sydney. The Governor coming up
to Hawkesbury a day or two afterwards, Mr. Baker represented to his
Excellency, the inconvenience he should suffer, if he was deprived of my
assistance, and obtained an order from him to retain me in his service.
This arrangement was not at all satisfactory to me, for I had long felt
an earnest desire to be employed in the commissariat, as the public
accompts therein kept, were of such a description as I always took
delight in, and I still flatter myself that from my quickness in figures,
I should be perfectly at home in such a situation. However I was not to
be gratified on that occasion, and I continued in the service of Mr.
Baker about three years. I had, in fact, reconciled myself to the idea
of serving out my full term of banishment with this worthy man; but on a
sudden, a letter was received by Mr. Arndell from Governor King, ordering
my instant removal to Sydney, for the purpose of assisting as a clerk in
the Secretary’s Office, which, as it was then established might be, and
was generally, called the Governor’s Office, being attached to Government
House, and under the immediate personal direction of the Governor
himself. Though this preferment seemed to hold out a prospect of future
advantage, and to confer increased respectability, it was with some
regret I quitted my comfortable little house and garden at “The Green
Hills[44],” where I had led a life of innocence and peaceful retirement;
whereas I was now about to enter a vortex of dissipation, folly and
wickedness, for such was Sydney compared to my late place of abode.

The Governor received me very graciously, allotted me a neat brick-house
in the vicinity of the office, and a government-man, victualled from
the King’s-stores, as a servant. For two or three months I continued
very steady, and formed but few acquaintances. The Governor behaved
to me with great liberality, and refused me no reasonable request. By
degrees, however, I began to degenerate. I increased my acquaintance
among the Commissary’s and some other clerks, most of whom lived an
expensive and dissipated life. All I can say in my own favour, is that
I continued to be regular in my attendance at the office, and was never
found defective, or incapable of my duty; but no sooner was I at my own
disposal than I eagerly sought my dissipated companions, and spent the
rest of the day in drinking, and other irregularities, sometimes at
public or disorderly houses, and frequently at my own, where I had often
the expensive pleasure of entertaining a large party of my fellow-scribes
at my own cost. This course of life unavoidably drew me into great
expenses, and I contracted several debts. Governor King, whose vigilant
observation nothing of this sort could escape, gave me frequent and
serious admonitions for my good; but I was so infatuated as to disregard
all advice, and only thought of devising pecuniary means to continue my
licentious career. This was no easy task, as the nature of business in
the Secretary’s Office afforded few opportunities of realizing money by
fraud, at least without the assistance of one or more confederates in a
neighbouring department. The expensive rate at which the Commissary’s
clerks constantly lived, had become matter of surprise to the Governor
as well as the magistrates, and was the theme of much conjecture among
the inhabitants of Sydney. Still, though it was palpable they had
recourse to fraud, they managed matters so adroitly that no irregularity
could be detected; and the efforts of the executive authority, to
develope their system, continued unavailing.

It was the custom of Governor King, as I have before observed, to use
only his initials as a signature on common occasions, and by application
and practice I acquired a knack of imitating this sign-manual with
sufficient accuracy to impose upon the parties to whom the superscription
was addressed. Finding these three letters to have the magical effect of
procuring for me whatever articles I required, from the King’s-stores,
I availed myself of their talismanic power, and converting the goods
so obtained into money, I discharged my debts, and figured away with
increased _eclat_, among my fellow-clerks. As it was, however, both
impolitic and dangerous to carry this branch of fraud too far, or
practice it too frequently, I at length found means to form a connexion
with two or three of my most experienced friends, and we concerted such a
system of ways and means as promised liberally to supply our wants, and,
while we continued true to each other, seemed to preclude a possibility
of detection.

As I do not conceive myself justified in exposing either the parties who
were my colleagues, or the particular nature of our artifices, let it
suffice to inform the reader, that (as is indeed usually and deservedly
the fate of all sinister practices) a mere and most unexpected accident,
and for which none of us could attach blame to ourselves, discovered
to the Governor a principal branch of that prolific tree of fraud and
imposition, from whose productive fruitfulness we had so abundantly
derived the means of gratifying our folly and intemperance, which we at
that time miscalled a love of pleasure; but (to continue the metaphor)
the root and body of this tree, still remained hidden from the strict
and rigid search set on foot by the Governor, and after this transitory
alarm had subsided, proved to its remaining adherents, a source of supply
for a considerable time. It so happened that I was the ostensible party
in the particular affair which led to this discovery; and Governor King
immediately took the most active measures to effect a full developement
of that system which he well knew to be the ground-work of mal-practices
to a considerable extent.

With this view I underwent several private examinations before his
Excellency and some of the principal officers, and great promises were
held out to extract information from me, but without effect, as I was
determined not to betray my friends, whose ruin could not at all
palliate my guilt, or, as I conceived, render me a whit more deserving
of mercy. I therefore persisted in asserting my innocence of the present
charge, and disclaimed all knowledge of fraud in any other person.

The Governor was so much exasperated at my obstinacy, that he at length
had recourse (as a _dernier resort_,) to the expedient of flogging to
extort confession. I must, however, (for justice sake,) acknowledge
that such cruelty was rarely exercised by Governor King, who in his
cooler moments was a most humane character. To the honour of our present
governor (Macquarrie,) be it recorded, that not only this inhuman
practice is exploded, but corporal punishment is seldom inflicted at all,
and when rendered necessary, it is used with moderation.

To resume, the Governor finding me firm in my resolution to give him
no satisfaction, ordered Dr. Harris, who was present, to take me to
the jail-yard, send for the public executioner, and there to give me
five-and-twenties, (this was his phrase,) till I confessed the whole
truth. Pursuant to this order I accompanied Mr. Harris to the appointed
spot, and while the finisher of the law was arranging matters for the
approaching ceremony, the Doctor used all his art of persuasion to induce
me for my own sake, to avoid the disgrace and pain of a correction, which
he must, if I continued obstinate, inflict in its fullest extent.

There was certainly much justice in this gentleman’s arguments, and,
although I am confident I could have summoned up resolution to have
continued silent under the threatened chastisement, yet, on mature
reflection, I was convinced of the folly of such a conduct, as there was
already sufficient and incontrovertible proof of guilt against me. I,
therefore, determined to acknowledge my errors, and submit my fate to
the Governor’s pleasure. Of this intention I acquainted Mr. Harris, who
immediately stayed the proceedings about to take place, and supplying me
with pen and paper, desired me to write my declaration, which he would
himself convey to the Governor. In the letter I hastily composed, I
informed his Excellency, that feelings of remorse and regret for my ill
conduct, rather than a fear of punishment, had induced me to confess to
him that I was guilty of the charge brought against me on the present
occasion, and with shame I acknowledged having repeatedly transgressed
in a similar manner, in order to defray the expenses of the unbecoming
course of life I had imprudently fallen into. But I positively declared
that no other person whatever was privy to my numerous acts of fraud,
as those counterfeit documents framed by me, had passed through the
usual official channels as genuine; and, consequently, the parties who
had admitted and sanctioned them, were utterly guiltless of connivance,
and had done no more than their duty. I added, that I knew how justly
I deserved to suffer for my faults; but I also knew that mercy was the
predominant sentiment in His Excellency’s bosom, and on that mercy I
therefore most humbly threw myself.

Doctor Harris immediately proceeded to Government-house with my letter,
and I was soon afterwards summoned to follow in person. His Excellency
seemed not displeased at the course I had adopted, and he was now in a
very mild and placid mood. After expatiating at some length, and in a
serio-comic strain, with his usual eccentricity, on the ill return I had
made for his favours, and so forth, he was pleased to order me back to
the jail, but in a tone that indicated no severity of intention. It gave
me much concern, however, that notwithstanding all I had before said,
or could now protest on the subject, the Governor ordered a young man
in a confidential situation under government, to be dismissed from his
office, under an impression that he was privy to the fraud in question.
It is true indeed, this person, by the injudicious defence he made, was
the cause of his own misfortune, and had very nearly, from his statement
being at variance with mine, contributed to ruin all my hopes of belief.
But the Governor, who though shrewd at times, was not at all times a
Solomon, thought proper to credit my assertion, and reject the evidence
of the other party, as too improbable to be received.

The next morning early, an order came to the prison from his Excellency,
that I was to be double-ironed, and put to the hardest labour, in
common with those incorrigible characters composing what is called the
jail-gang: I was in consequence set to work at mending the public-roads,
_&c._ _&c._, and as I had never before used a heavier tool than a
goose-quill, I found this penance to bear hard upon me, and repented me
of the evil which had brought me to this woeful condition.




CHAPTER XVI.

    _Draughted to Castle-hill.—Variously employed
    there.—Appointed Clerk to the Settlement.—Again noticed
    by the Governor.—Summoned to Parramatta, by the Rev. Mr.
    Marsden.—Appointed Magistrate’s Clerk, and begin once more
    to lead an easy Life.—Preparations for the Governor’s
    Departure.—Mr. Marsden gives me hopes of accompanying himself
    and the Governor to England, in His Majesty’s Ship Buffalo.—My
    pleasing Sensations at the Prospect of revisiting my Native
    Land._


I continued to labour in double-irons, (locked up every night in the
jail,) for about a month, when a draught of men being ordered to the
public agricultural settlement of Castle-hill, twenty-four miles from
Sydney, I was included in the number, and about twenty of us were
immediately sent up, escorted by constables. Notwithstanding my condition
in the jail-gang was deplorable enough, I felt a greater depression
at the thoughts of going to this settlement, a place of which, from
every account, I had conceived the most unfavourable idea. Though I
suffered much in Sydney, by being obliged to work till three o’clock
in so disgraceful a situation, yet when that hour released me from
the restraint of the overseer, I was enabled to visit my friends and
acquaintances, with whom I enjoyed myself till sun-set, when I was
obliged to return to the jail, and was locked up for the night. On
the contrary, Castle-hill being considered a place of punishment, the
prisoners there, who were sent up under circumstances like mine, were not
allowed to quit the settlement at all. On arriving at Castle-hill, I was
first employed at the hoe, which severe labour was so fatiguing to me,
that it had nearly the effect of breaking my heart. However, I contrived
at times to obtain a lighter employment: and during the term of my
remaining at this settlement, I had a spell at almost every kind of work
peculiar to the place.

After a few weeks had elapsed, I prevailed on the superintendent (Mr.
Knight,) who had conceived a partiality for me, to grant me a pass to
Parramatta, eight miles distant, and sixteen from Sydney. I had an
anxious wish to visit the latter place, but Mr. Knight had no power
to extend his permission so far, and I knew that application to the
magistrates at Parramatta would be fruitless. I, therefore, determined to
hazard a flogging, which would be the consequence of my detection, and to
take the wished-for trip without leave or license. This being Friday, and
my week’s work done, I accordingly set off, accompanied by two or three
others, similarly circumstanced, and after six hours’ walking arrived at
Sydney. Here I lay concealed in the house of a friend till Sunday noon,
when I again set out proceeding with the utmost caution, and arrived at
Castle-hill the same night, conformable to the tenor of my pass. As I
experienced nothing but misery and privation during five days in each
week, and found such enjoyments in Sydney, I repeated my excursion almost
every succeeding Friday, but was not always equally fortunate in my
proceedings. The police in Sydney having some information of my visits,
were constantly on the look-out for me, and I was at last apprehended,
punished with fifty lashes, and sent back in custody of a constable.
This did not deter me, however, from running the same risk at several
subsequent periods, only redoubling my precautions, and travelling in the
night.

I had been about ten months at Castle-hill, when the person who had
officiated as clerk of the camp, (that is, clerk to the superintendent,)
becoming a free man, quitted the settlement, and I being the only one
qualified for such an office, and in some favour with Mr. Knight, was
promoted to the situation. I now found myself perfectly at ease, and the
more so from having been so long kept at hard labour, for which I was but
ill adapted. My duty consisted in measuring the daily portion of ground
to the different gangs who were breaking up, chipping, _&c._, keeping a
daily account of the various works carried on, mustering the prisoners
every Monday morning, writing passes at the week’s end, assisting in the
issue of provisions from the store, _&c._ _&c._; and as these duties were
all perfectly familiar to me I acquitted myself with credit, and, by
observing a proper conduct, gained the good will of all parties.

Governor King was frequently in the habit of visiting the settlement, for
the purpose of personally inspecting the state of things, and as he had
received favourable accounts of my general conduct, he began about this
time to notice me in a manner that shewed (I thought,) an inclination to
restore me to his wonted favour. But as I had now little more than a year
of my time unexpired, and was tolerably comfortable in my new situation,
I had so far reconciled myself, that I was but little anxious about a
removal, until the hour of my freedom arrived. However, it was destined
otherwise, and I underwent another very unexpected change of fortune.
In the beginning of August 1806, I was suddenly summoned by a special
messenger, to attend on the Reverend Mr. Marsden, the chief magistrate of
Parramatta. I immediately obeyed this summons, of the cause of which I
could form no conjecture. On my arrival at the court-house, Mr. Marsden
informed me, that he had sent for me to assist him in taking a muster
of the inhabitants of Parramatta, and the surrounding districts, which
was to commence that very day, and to form part of a general muster
throughout the colony, at this period in progress. I felt myself a little
flattered by this distinction, as Mr. Marsden had already a clerk, but
it seems he was not sufficiently quick, and it was known that I had
before frequently officiated on similar occasions. I assured Mr. Marsden
that I would with pleasure undertake the task, and at the appointed
hour we proceeded to business. The muster occupied two whole days, and,
being ended, Mr. Marsden told me that his clerk, having received a free
pardon from Governor King, was about to quit the colony in a few days,
and that it was his intention to appoint me his successor, promising,
if I behaved well, to shew me every indulgence in his power. He then
desired I would go back to Castle-hill, for the purpose of arranging my
affairs, and return as soon as possible to Parramatta. I lost no time in
obeying these orders, and the following day again presented myself to
Mr. Marsden. I was immediately put in possession of the court-house, a
comfortable brick building, surrounded by a good garden, which was to be
my place of residence. I was allowed a government servant, and also an
old man as housekeeper: the latter being equal to any little services I
wanted, I was enabled to permit the former to work for his own living,
allowing me a weekly sum for the indulgence, according to the custom of
the colony, and as he had hitherto done to my predecessor. In addition
to this privilege, I was allowed various fees in the course of my public
duties, agreeably to a code or table sanctioned by the magistrates, so
that upon the whole my income was sufficient to support me in a manner
becoming the respectability of my appointment. Mr. Marsden and his
colleague in the commission, Captain Abbot, were accustomed to preside
as a bench of magistrates every Saturday, and sometimes alternately
on other days in each week. On these occasions it was my duty to take
depositions, write out warrants, commitments, _&c._ _&c._ I had besides
to keep a general account of all public work in Parramatta, compiled
from the reports of the different overseers, _&c._ In this situation,
my knowledge of the law, and my acquaintance with Burn’s Justice proved
of the utmost advantage, as there were many cases constantly occurring,
in which certain formalities (dispensed with before my appointment,)
gave an official aspect to the proceedings of the court, and added a
solemnity productive of the best effects. Upon the whole I found myself
very comfortably situated, and I had the pleasure to observe that my
exertions to acquit myself in the most becoming manner, procured me the
consideration such a conduct merited, from the gentlemen under whom I
acted.

In the month of October following my removal to Parramatta, the departure
of Governor King for England, in His Majesty’s Ship Buffalo, was
publicly announced to take place in the ensuing month, his Excellency’s
successor, Governor Bligh, having arrived in the preceding August, on
the 13th of which month the latter assumed the supreme command. Since
the period of his supersession, Governor King had principally resided
at Parramatta, and I was frequently employed by him in arranging his
private accounts, transcribing directions to his agents respecting his
farms, live-stock, _&c._, and various other matters. On these occasions
he treated me with the greatest politeness, and appeared to have quite
forgot my former delinquencies. One day Mr. Marsden questioned me as to
the length of time I had to serve, and on my answering eleven months,
he distantly hinted that if he could depend on my future good conduct,
he was not without hopes of prevailing on Governor King to procure a
remission of my remaining term, and allow me a passage to England in
his own ship; adding, that himself and family were about proceeding
to Europe by the same opportunity. This being an event of which I had
never entertained the slightest hope, my joyful emotions at the bare
idea, could only be equalled by my surprise at such an intimation. It
immediately struck me that the latter was the result of preconcertion
between Governor King and Mr. Marsden, and that it was at the bottom, his
Excellency’s wish to render me this essential service. The sequel proved
that my conjectures were not unfounded, for it afterwards appeared that
Governor King having an incredible number of public documents lying in
a state of great confusion, and most of which he wanted copied prior to
delivering them up, it was indispensably necessary that he should have
an expeditious and experienced clerk, to transcribe and arrange such
papers, during his voyage home; and it seems he knew of no person more
eligible for such an employment than myself. I replied to Mr. Marsden,
with a warmth and earnestness which convinced him how happy such an
arrangement would make me, and assured him of my everlasting gratitude
towards himself and the late Governor for their consideration; earnestly
pressing Mr. Marsden to a speedy “consummation” of what I so “devoutly
wished.” The anxiety of mind produced in me by this conversation may be
conceived by the reader, if he reflects upon the situation in which I was
then placed; for, though it was my chief and ardent wish to return to my
native land as soon as I became free, yet as I had no apparent prospect
of realizing money enough to pay my passage, and the hardships incidental
to working for it, would expose me to the most trying severities, such
an opportunity as the one I now contemplated, could not be too highly
appreciated, or too eagerly embraced.




CHAPTER XVII.

    _The Buffalo being ready for Sea, I receive an Intimation from
    Mr. Marsden, that the late Governor has obtained a Remission of
    my unexpired Time, and consents to take me home as his Clerk.—I
    wait on his Excellency accordingly, and receive orders to go on
    board.—We set sail._


The process of fitting out and victualling the Buffalo, with other
causes, delayed the Governor’s departure for some weeks after the
appointed time. At length I received, about the first of February, in a
note from Mr. Marsden, (who with his family, had removed to Sydney, in
readiness for embarkation,) the agreeable tidings that Governor King had
consented to take me on board the Buffalo, in the capacity of his private
clerk, and had obtained the sanction of Governor Bligh for my departure
from the colony. Mr. Marsden concluded with advising me to wait on
Governor King without delay, for the purpose of receiving his commands. I
immediately hastened to Sydney, and waited on his Excellency; who after
some conversation, told me that the Buffalo’s complement being already
full, it was not in his power to put me on the ship’s books[45], but
that he would give me a passage, and himself supply me with provisions.
He then inquired if I was incumbered with any debts; and, on my answering
that I owed to individuals about twenty pounds, and to Government, for
various articles from the stores, about fifteen pounds, his Excellency
advised me to take measures for settling these accompts, and, having so
done, to repair on board with the least possible delay. I now returned
to Parramatta, (having first given the usual notice of my departure
for publication in the Sydney Gazette,) and applied with diligence to
the settlement of my affairs. I was not displeased at the Governor’s
intimation respecting not putting me on the Buffalo’s books, because, had
he so done, it being war time, I might have found a difficulty in getting
clear of her on our arrival in England: on the other hand, by going home
as a passenger, although I should forego the advantage of pay, for the
time occupied in our voyage, yet I should be at liberty to quit the ship
the moment we anchored. I was not altogether so easy with respect to my
debts, as I feared my utmost means were inadequate to their liquidation.
’Tis true, I had a watch, some good clothes, and other effects, which
altogether might suffice to discharge my private debts, but then I should
much distress myself by the deprival of these useful articles. As to
my Government debt, I had a secret hope that the generosity of Governor
King (which was often conspicuous when his privy purse was not encroached
upon,) would induce him to assist me in surmounting that difficulty.

I lost not a moment in settling my business at Parramatta, and returning
to Sydney with all my worldly goods, I waited on my principal creditor,
with whom I managed to square the yards on tolerably easy terms. I was
obliged, however, to dispose of nearly all my personal effects, before
I could satisfy the private demands upon me, retaining only a very
limited stock of indispensable articles for my voyage, and one genteel
suit of clothes for the purpose of attiring myself on quitting the ship,
together with an English half-guinea to bear my expenses from Portsmouth
to London. Having taken these measures, I embarked with my chest and
bedding on the 5th of February, Governor King and Mr. Marsden with their
respective families, being already on board. His Excellency hearing of my
arrival, sent for me to his cabin, and questioned me on the subject of my
debts. I informed him, that I had discharged every claim upon me, except
the sum I owed to the Crown, and confessed my inability to liquidate that
account, without some extension of his Excellency’s kind assistance. The
Governor after some moments’ reflection, wrote a short memorandum, which
he ordered me to take to Mr. Commissary Palmer, to whom it was addressed.
I accordingly went on shore, and proceeding to the Commissary’s office,
delivered the note, which Mr. Palmer having read, handed to one of his
clerks, directing him to comply with the tenor of it, which was to the
following effect:—“James Vaux (the bearer) having behaved well in the
different situations of store-keeper’s, secretary’s, and magistrate’s
clerk, I think the small sum he stands indebted to Government ought
to be remitted him.” (Signed) “P. G. K.” The clerk having turned to
my account in the ledger, gave me credit therein, to the amount of my
debt, by an item worded as follows:—“By remuneration for services as
clerk, _&c._” This point being adjusted, I now found myself perfectly
disembarrassed, and free to depart the country. With a joyful heart, I
took leave of my old acquaintances and fellow-clerks, with some of whom
I spent a convivial evening, and the next day I finally embarked, all
things being now in readiness, and the ship only waiting the auspicious
breeze. On the 10th of February, 1807, was the happy day. At an early
hour the ship was crowded with visiters, comprising most of the principal
officers of the colony, with their ladies and friends, as well as many
respectable inhabitants, all anxious to testify their heartfelt respect
towards a departing Governor, whose general conduct had gained him
universal esteem, and who had, during a government of six years, united
the tenderness of a parent with the authority of a chief. The vessel
was surrounded with boats, some of which brought various friends of the
ship’s company, passengers, _&c._, who came to take a last farewell;
others contained spectators of both sexes, attracted by curiosity to
witness the interesting scene, as well as to shew their loyalty and good
wishes by joining in the parting cheers, with which the air resounded
as we cleared the heads of the harbour, to which distance most of the
boats accompanied us. About three o’clock P. M. the breeze freshening,
we quickly gained a good offing, and by half past four a sudden squall,
attended with rain and mist, obscured from us all view of the land, which
we beheld no more.




CHAPTER XVIII.

    _Receive a free Pardon from the hands of Captain (late
    Governor) King.—Account of our Passage Home.—Suffer a
    great deal from the want of Provisions.—Leaky State of the
    Ship.—Double Cape Horn.—Fall in with an English Frigate, bound
    to the River Plate.—Arrive at Rio de Janeiro._


The morning after our sailing, Captain King, (as I shall in future style
him,) called me into his cabin, and presented me with a free pardon,
which, as he rightly observed, was merely a matter of form, as it was
probable we should not arrive in England before the expiration of my
time. This instrument, though only made out a few days before, was
ante-dated the 12th of August, 1806, being the day before Governor Bligh
assumed the command, and was consequently the last official document, to
which Governor King had affixed his signature, and the last public act of
his government.

In about a week, we made the island of New Zealand, at which it was
captain King’s intention to have touched, having some live pigs, brought
from Port Jackson, for the purpose of presenting to the native chiefs,
two of whom had lately visited, and resided for some months in New South
Wales; but this kind idea was frustrated by a squall of wind, which took
us aback while in sight of the island, and night coming on, it was not
considered prudent to approach the land; we therefore hauled our wind,
and shaped our course to the southward.

Captain King had given orders to the ship’s steward, that I should
receive his (Captain King’s) own ration of provisions, on which I was
to subsist as well as I could. This quota (according to the usual
allowance of the navy,) would have been amply sufficient, but by some
unaccountable want of management, the Buffalo, notwithstanding the length
of time occupied in preparation, was at last sent to sea with a very
limited supply of provisions; nor was what she really had of the kind
or quality invariably allowed in the King’s service; the consequence
was, that on the very day of our sailing, all hands were put upon
half-allowance of bread, (that is, half a pound per day,) and the other
half of rice: this latter grain was also substituted on banyan days for
pease and for oatmeal: of cheese and butter we were also destitute; so
that we had not a prospect of much good living before us. Of the rice,
the crew soon became so much tired, that they ceased to draw any from
the purser, leaving it in his hands, to be compensated for at the end
of our voyage. The salt-meat was also barely adequate to the computed
length of our passage to Rio de Janeiro, the first port at which we
could hope for a further supply. The reader will allow that half a pound
of bread was little enough for a man’s daily ration, (being just two
biscuits) but ere we had been six weeks at sea, it was found necessary to
reduce the allowance to one-third of a pound; and, in a few weeks more,
it was lowered to one quarter, that is, a biscuit a day! The necessity
of these reductions arose from a discovery that the rats, cockroaches,
and other vermin, with which the ship was infested, had made a most
destructive devastation in the bread-room, besides which, a leak in the
side had admitted so much salt-water, that a great many bags of biscuit
were totally spoiled, thereby adding to our distress, which was before
sufficiently great. Even the small portion of bread we did receive, was
scarcely eatable, most of it being very old stores, and full of maggots,
and what was baked in the colony being of a very coarse quality, and
every biscuit more or less excavated by the vermin before-mentioned. The
Buffalo, as I have before shewn, was detained several months, for the
purpose of being properly victualled, and after all, the purser had been
obliged to take a quantity of wheat in casks, for consumption in some
shape or other, as it was found inexpedient to wait longer for a further
supply of biscuit. This wheat, when the crew were tired of rice, was
boiled in lieu of pease, and served out at dinner-time, but it was so
unpalatable a mess, that I, among many others, could never stomach it,
being thrown into the coppers, dust and all, boiled in stinking water,
and when taken up, it was nearly as hard as when first put in, and much
inferior to the food of pigs in England. The ship’s company at length
were convinced of their folly, in suffering such a mode of cookery, or
rather waste, for very few could eat it; and, there being luckily a
steel-mill on board, it was ordered to be put up in the after gun-room,
and every mess in the ship, in its turn, ground the next day’s portion
of wheat over night, and sifting the meal, produced a bag of tolerable
flour, of which the cook composed a certain food for breakfast, known
among sailors by the name of _skilligolee_, being, in plain English,
paste, similar to that used by the sons of Crispin, only not quite of
so thick a consistence: however, it was much preferable to the hog-wash
before-mentioned, and, with a little sugar, served as an apology for a
meal.

I have before observed, that I drew Captain King’s ration of provisions,
but he withheld the daily allowance of spirits, forming part of the
said ration, which he himself received, and deposited in his private
liquor-case. It is, however, probable that his lady, who was a rigid
economist, was the suggester of this practice. By way of composition,
this good lady gave directions that I should receive a dram every day
from her own steward. This trifling indulgence by the by, was not ordered
me, until the severity of the climate compelled me to give a hint on the
subject, and after about three week’s continuance it was put a stop to,
on pretence of the stock becoming low. Upon the whole, I suffered a great
deal from the scantiness, as well as the quality of my allowance, and the
want of certain comforts to which I had been accustomed, particularly
during the severe weather which we encountered in our voyage round Cape
Horn. It soon appeared that I was not to eat the bread of idleness; I
was employed from morning till night in copying and arranging Captain
King’s papers, of which he had several large trunks full. I had also the
tuition of his daughter Miss King, who was about twelve years of age, and
performed the same duty towards Mr. Marsden’s two children, as well as a
native boy about fourteen, who had been brought up in the family of Mr.
Marsden. This youth had received the rudiments of a good education, and
discovered a most susceptible genius. He could read and write tolerably
well, was perfectly docile, and well-behaved, and would doubtless have
been an object of general admiration, and reflected the highest credit on
his humane benefactors had he ever reached England, but unhappily during
our stay at Rio Janeiro, he absconded from the house of his protectors,
in consequence of some chastisement for misconduct, and, notwithstanding
every exertion was used, he could not be recovered before the ship’s
departure.

To add to our sufferings from the dearth of provisions, we had not been a
month at sea, before the ship was discovered to be in a very leaky state,
and these leaks increased so rapidly, that she at length made above five
feet water in the well, every four hours.

As we approached the higher latitudes, the climate became every day more
intensely cold, and we had continual tempestuous gales for several weeks,
but fortunately they were from the right quarter, so that we were in
general before the wind, and, considering that our ship was a very heavy
sailer, made a pretty rapid progress.

On the 10th of March, having reached a certain degree of longitude, I
witnessed the remarkable circumstance of gaining a day, the consequence
of circumnavigating the globe. The effect was, that the following day,
as well as this, was called in the ship’s log, the 10th of March, so
that we had actually two Tuesdays in one week! This was a favourable
circumstance in one respect to myself and the ship’s company, for as
Tuesday is a sumptuous day in point of allowance in the navy, beef and
pudding being the prescribed fare for dinner, we by this accident feasted
two days together; whereas had it occurred on a Monday, Wednesday, or
Friday, two successive banyan (or starvation) days would have been our
dismal portion. On our arrival in England our account of time after this
alteration, corresponded exactly with the almanack for the year.

On the 15th of March, we rounded Cape Horn, passing within five miles
of that inhospitable shore. This point of the American continent, is
situated in fifty-six degrees of south latitude, and had we passed it in
the winter season, instead of the autumn, the cold would have been hardly
bearable; as it was, it had the effect of destroying almost every natural
production of New South Wales, with some very fine specimens of which
our ship was at first literally crowded, so as to resemble Noah’s Ark.
There were kangaroos, black swans, a noble emu, and cockatoos, parrots,
and smaller birds without number; all of which, except one cockatoo,
which was carefully nursed by its mistress, and half a dozen swans,
fell victims to the severity of the weather. The latter birds, indeed,
being natives of Van Diemen’s Land, which is a colder climate than Port
Jackson, were of a hardy nature, and survived our long and tedious
voyage. On their arrival in England, they were sent by Captain King as a
present to the Royal Menagerie in Kew-gardens.

In our passage round Cape Horn, we had frequent storms of snow; a native
of New Zealand, who had been for some time on board the Buffalo, and
was a very active intelligent fellow, expressed the utmost surprise
on observing a phenomenon, which in the happy clime of his nativity
is never experienced, and in the first emotions of his admiration,
exclaimed, “Look, look, white rain, white rain!” This man would have been
an object of curiosity in England, for he had a very handsome person,
and was punctured or tattooed in a most fanciful and extraordinary
manner from head to foot, including his face, which was covered with
ornamental devices; but unhappily he contracted the small-pox, which,
notwithstanding all possible attention, carried him off before we arrived
at the Brazils.

I must not omit a remarkable and awful phenomenon, which occurred during
this part of our passage. In the middle of a tempestuous night, a sudden
concussion was heard, resembling the report of a cannon close to us; it
alarmed three parts of the people who were below asleep, as well as the
watch on deck; and the general opinion was at first, that a ship was
close aboard us. Every one hurried upon deck, when the cause was found to
have been, what is called a Fire-ball, which had been probably attracted
by the spindle at the mast-head, for it made a rapid descent down the
main-mast, exploded at the break of the quarter-deck; the concussion had
knocked down a quarter-master who stood near the binnacle, and two men
who were at the wheel. The former was for some minutes insensible, but
happily they were no further injured than by the fright. Captain King
was instantly on deck with his usual promptness, and fearing the effects
of the fire, gave orders to cover the magazine-scuttle with wet-swabs;
then to sound the pump-well, for some were in dread of the ball having
gone through the ship’s bottom: however, it appeared the ship made only
the usual quantity of water, and that no real injury was sustained.
Another night, as we were scudding before a heavy gale of wind, and a
tremendous sea rolling after us, we had the misfortune to be pooped, as
the phrase is, by a wave or sea striking our stern, which stove in the
cabin-windows, and rushing impetuously through the cabin, and along the
main-deck, bore down all before it. Luckily no farther damage was done
than breaking the windows, which rendered it necessary to put up the
dead-lights during the remainder of the passage.

When within a day or two’s sail of the River Plate, as we were running
down the coast of Brazil, we fell in with a frigate, which, on hailing,
we found to be His Majesty’s ship Thisbe, bound to Buenos Ayres, having
on board, General Whitelocke and his staff. This officer was going to
conduct the attack upon the city above mentioned, as well as upon Monte
Video, both belonging to the Spaniards. A formidable expedition had
been fitted out in England for the service, and a numerous army was
already collected in the River Plate, waiting the arrival of General
Whitelocke. Captain King complimented this officer with a visit on board
the Thisbe, which the latter returned. On arriving abreast of the River
Plate, the Thisbe parted from us, steering for the entrance of that
river, and we continued our course along-shore. In a few days we came in
sight of Rio de Janeiro, but were becalmed for two days in sight of the
port. At length, on the 22d of May, we entered that beautiful harbour,
after a most hazardous and blowing passage of fifteen weeks. It was
remarkable that on the day before we got in, the last biscuit was issued
to the ship’s company, and the last cask of salt-meat we possessed, was
broached; so that had our passage been longer protracted, we must have
endured still greater privations.




CHAPTER XIX.

    _Account of my Adventures at San Sebastian.—Form acquaintance
    with a Portuguese Family.—Their Affection for me.—Overtures
    made to induce my Stay in South America;—The Ship being
    repaired and victualled, we re-embark and sail for Europe._


On coming to an anchor in the usual situation, we were boarded by
several persons of distinction, accompanied by an intelligent gentleman
as interpreter; after a conference between whom and Captain King, it
was determined that the latter should without delay address an official
letter to the Viceroy, stating the causes of his putting into that port,
the nature of his wants, and other particulars. Captain King accordingly
sketched a draught, which I was employed to transcribe. This letter
explained to his Excellency (the Viceroy) the leaky and disabled state
of His Majesty’s ship; her want of provisions and water, _&c._ _&c._;
and concluded with expressing Captain King’s willingness to compliment
the Portuguese flag, by firing a salute of fifteen guns, provided the
Viceroy would pledge himself to return an equal number. It is to be
observed, that among the Portuguese, every thing is conducted with the
utmost formality; and as they are highly jealous of foreigners, Captain
King (whose experience was very great in such matters) was particularly
cautious not to give any cause of offence, or to fail in due respect; at
the same time that he was determined to support the honour of his own
nation, by stipulating for an equal interchange of ceremony, conformable
to the etiquette of the service. No foreign vessels are suffered to
proceed beyond a certain distance within the harbour, without special
permission. One object of request in the letter was therefore, that the
Buffalo might be allowed to anchor above the Island of Cobres, (or Snake
Island) where she could have the benefit of smooth water to undergo the
necessary repairs. Other objects were, to be furnished with shipwrights,
caulkers, _&c._, to have a new rudder (our own being sprung) prepared in
the dock-yard, as also a new boltsprit from the same cause, permission to
land and house the rigging and other stores in convenient receptacles;
a daily supply of fresh meat, vegetables, _&c._, and several other
similar demands. To this letter a most gracious answer was returned,
assuring Captain King of the fullest compliance with his requisitions,
and expressing every sentiment of friendship for the English nation,
and of respect for his person. His Excellency’s letter concluded with
the usual compliment of the Portuguese “God preserve your Excellency
many years.” At the same time was transmitted a long table of rules and
ceremonies, to be observed by our ship’s company, _&c._ These rules were
promulgated by Captain King, who ordered the strictest attention to be
paid thereto. They related to the times and places of landing from boats;
the behaviour of the English when on shore; respect to be paid to the
Catholic religion and its ministers, _&c._ _&c._ Among other injunctions
it was expected that every Englishman on passing a church should move his
hat, and pay the same compliment to the Image of the Virgin Mary, which
you encounter at the corner of every principal street, enclosed in a sort
of cupboard with a glass-door, and silk-curtains drawn open on each side.
These cupboards are affixed to the wall, on a level with the first-floor
windows of the house, and at night a lamp is kept burning over them,
which has a very pretty effect. It was also required that every person,
on meeting the Host (which is a grand procession of priests, friars,
_&c._, followed by an immense rabble) should bend on one knee, and so
remain till the procession was past. The priests, on this occasion,
carry gold or silver images of our Saviour and the saints, accompanied
with musical instruments, flags, numerous lighted flambeaus, and every
other device to render the scene at once grand, solemn, and impressive.
In fact, I witnessed various processions of a religious nature during
my stay here, scarcely a night passing without one or more; but it is
foreign to my purpose, to enter into more minute details. It being the
first Catholic country I was ever in, I was struck with admiration at
the grandeur of the churches, the nightly exhibitions of fire-works,
illuminations, ringing of bells, and other demonstrations of religious
respect, or what we should call superstition. But I am of opinion there
is much policy in carrying these rites to such an extravagant pitch, for
the population of this city being composed of negroes, in the proportion,
I take it, of at least nineteen to one white, and the majority of the
former being slaves, the splendour and enchanting effects of music,
paintings, fire-works, processions, and other devices, together with the
implicit devotion in which they are brought up to the Catholic religion,
keep their minds in a continual state of resigned subjection, amuse their
senses, and leave neither time, nor inducement to attempt, by acts of
rebellion, a release from their habitual bondage.

To resume my narrative: all preliminaries being settled to the
satisfaction of both parties, Captain King, a few days after our arrival,
hired a commodious and handsome house, ready-furnished, in a pleasant
part of the town, to which he with his whole family removed. I, of
course, accompanied them, highly delighted at the prospect of viewing
this beautiful city, and observing the manners and customs of its
inhabitants, from which I anticipated the greatest gratification. Mr.
Marsden and his family, also occupied a genteel house, and in fact, all
the passengers (of whom we had a good number) quitted the ship, which was
intended to undergo a thorough repair.

During our residence ashore, I had much leisure time, which I employed in
walking throughout the city and suburbs, viewing the churches, convents,
and other objects deserving of notice; and I endeavoured to acquire, by
every means opportunity offered, some little knowledge of the Portuguese
language. As the latter bears a great affinity to the Latin and French,
I succeeded beyond my hopes in this object, by virtue of which I was
enabled to extend my inquiries, and to interchange personal civilities
with many of the inhabitants.

In the street in which we resided, I had frequently observed an old lady,
together with three young ones, sitting at the door of a genteel-looking
house, employed, according to their custom, in weaving lace, with a
number of bobbins, and a cushion placed before them. This employment
serves both as an amusement, and a source of profit to the younger
branches of families.—They were seated cross-legged on the floor of the
parlour, the door of which, (composed of lattice-work) was open for the
benefit of air. In the evenings I generally saw them seated in the same
manner, in conversation, the old lady turning over her beads, of which
a string, or rosary, with a cross suspended to the end of it, was hung
upon her wrist, and appeared to receive her devout attention. Having
repeatedly passed this interesting group, and fancying that they noticed
me with some emotion, I ventured to compliment them _en passant_, which
courtesy they returned with evident pleasure; and every succeeding
salutation produced a longer dialogue than the preceding; till at length
the old lady one evening invited me to enter, and sit down; but not on
the floor, for they had chairs, as well as other furniture, of an elegant
but simple kind. These good ladies put several questions to me respecting
the English Governor (as they styled him) my situation in his family,
name, _&c._ I informed them, as fully as I could find words for; and
telling them my name in Portuguese, they ever afterwards called me Senor
Jacobe, it not being their custom to use surnames. I had the pleasure
to find that we understood each other tolerably well, and gathered from
them, that the old lady was called Senora Donna Joaquima Roza de Lacè;
(as the Vicar of Wakefield says, I love to give the name at full length;)
she was the widow of a military officer in the Portuguese service, and
enjoyed a pension from the government, upon which, and the earnings of
her accomplished daughters, she lived in a private, but genteel manner:
the latter were named Donna Anna Precioza, Donna Joaquima, and Donna
Joanina. The mother was a most agreeable woman, courteous and affable to
a degree, but seemingly a strong devotee to her religion. The daughters
were beautiful girls, evidently of a susceptible disposition; but, like
the Portugueze in general, very reserved, and tenacious of their sex’s
dignity. They pressed me to partake of some coffee, which was served in
with much ceremony by a female negro; and after two or three hours most
agreeably spent, I took leave, with an earnest injunction to repeat my
visit.

From this time hardly a day passed without my calling on this worthy
family, and at every visit we parted with a stronger regard for each
other. I felt a growing sentiment in favour of the eldest daughter
(Anna,) and I ingratiated myself with the mother, by warmly praising the
Catholic religion, shewing my respect by kissing the cross attached to
her beads, and every other means in my power. In a few days I became, as
it were, one of the family, visiting them at all hours, and experiencing
the kindest welcome. The ladies took a pleasure in improving my knowledge
in their language, and in return requested me to teach them my own. At
this period there were very few English persons in the Brazils; but
the inhabitants, in general, evinced the greatest fondness for our
nation; so that not the meanest of our ship’s company could walk the
streets without being gratified with hearing the exclamation of “Sta bon
Inglise,” (very good Englishman,) from the mouths of passengers, both
men, women, and children. Myself and other persons, whose appearance was
at all respectable, were also very courteously saluted by the females,
who stand for hours peeping through the lattice-windows of the houses,
which are half opened, so as to give them a view, and although most of
these diffident ladies close the lattice and retire with precipitation,
on the approach of a male stranger, yet many of them suffered me to hold
a conversation for a few minutes; and I sometimes prevailed so far as
to obtain one of their fair hands to kiss, a mark of great favour and
condescension, even to their common acquaintances.

Captain King received every possible mark of respect both public and
private, during his residence in this city. Whenever he appeared abroad
in an open chaise, (which he hired by the month,) or on horseback, the
military-guard at every public post which he passed, were turned out to
pay him the same honours as are usually rendered to the viceroy himself.
The latter officer also shewed him every attention, frequently exchanging
visits with him, lending him his own horses for a ride, _&c._ Most of the
principal inhabitants paid their respects to Mrs. King, and invited her
to various public and private entertainments. The Portuguese excel in
music, particularly the violin and bass-viol; and there were frequently
large parties of amateurs at our house, who formed a most delightful
evening concert. This is, in fact, the custom of all people of fashion
there, who, instead of meeting for the purpose of gaming as in London,
adopt this much more laudable and rational mode of amusement.

I observed, as I traversed the city, that a number of bonfires were
lighted in various streets, as soon as it grew dusk, almost every
evening, which were surrounded by children, negroes, and others,
rejoicing until a late hour. As these fires were never twice in the same
spot, I was at a loss to understand their meaning, until I at length
ascertained that they were in celebration of the birth-days of children.
The custom of observing such days differs, however, from our own country;
for instead of taking place on the anniversary of the child’s nativity,
the observation is confined to the festival of that particular Saint
after whom the child is named; for instance, on St. Anna’s day, all
persons who have a daughter called Anna, celebrate the same by regaling
their friends, and having a bonfire before their door. As almost every
day in the year is dedicated to a male or female saint, whose name is
borne by some hundreds of children, these bonfires are, of course,
frequent and numerous. The effect of them is both lively and gratifying,
especially to those who know their cause; but many of the streets
being extremely narrow, and some of the fires very large, I have been
frequently much embarrassed to effect a passage, in which attempt I was
sometimes in danger of being scorched by the intense heat reflected from
the stone walls of which the houses are composed.

Another object of my attention was the slave-market, which is held on the
arrival of a Guinea ship, in the suburbs of the city. These unfortunate
beings are chained together, and driven to the scene of this disgraceful
traffic, where they are sold like cattle or sheep in Smithfield. A
healthy youth of about fifteen will produce from about thirty to fifty
pounds, this being considered the most advantageous age at which a slave
can be purchased. The condition of this unhappy class of persons is,
however, much more tolerable in this city than a stranger would suppose.
Most of the inhabitants possess a male or female, (some several,)
exclusive of those employed in household affairs. These superfluous
slaves are sent out in a morning to ply for hire on their owner’s
account, and obtain as much as they can by their labour; the majority of
the women confine themselves to carrying water from the fountains, which
they cry as the venders of milk do in London; and on being hailed, they
stop and empty their vessel, for which they receive a vintain, (about
three halfpence;) they then return to the nearest fountain to replenish.
I could not help being surprised at the large size of the vessels in
which they carry this water on their heads; they are a kind of wooden
casks, some of them holding at least ten gallons.

Having mentioned the public fountains, (with which this city abounds,)
it may not be amiss to describe them. There being but few springs in the
town, water is conveyed by means of a noble brick aqueduct (communicating
with others,) from a distance of several miles through the interior,
over the summits of many high hills, and being distributed throughout
the city, it supplies a fountain in most of the principal streets. These
fountains are handsomely constructed of stone, having a large cistern
into which the purest water is constantly running from the beaks of
several ducks, geese, or other birds, which are of cast metal, and well
executed. As the trade of water-carrying furnishes employment for many
hundreds of negro women, and their continual resort to the fountains
would occasion much confusion and quarrelling, a soldier is placed in
attendance to preserve order, and the women seat themselves in a row
on a long bench fixed on purpose, where they are obliged to wait for
their turn to fill. It is a curious and interesting sight to observe
these harmless and industrious creatures conversing with each other, and
smoking their pipes, while they patiently await the sentinel’s intimation
to approach. The incessant prattle of their tongues may be heard by a
passenger long before he reaches the spot, and adds to the novelty of the
scene.

The negroes I saw here, the majority of whom are natives, born of those
imported from Africa, or of their descendants, are upon the whole the
most comely race of blacks I ever met with. The men wear coarse jackets
and trowsers, the women a sort of gown of blue cloth; but their linen is
always remarkably white, of a fine texture, and beautifully wrought with
ornamental work about the sleeves and bosom. They have also bracelets
both on the wrists and ancles, and ear-rings, all of the purest gold.
Both sexes are very cleanly in their persons, and of a most docile and
gentle disposition.

By the kindness of my worthy friends, the ladies, I obtained frequent
admission to the Opera, (as it is called, though the pieces I saw
appeared to be principally comedies and farces, with scarcely any vocal
music.) As I could not understand the plot, or dialogue, my chief
satisfaction was in contemplating the _coup d’œil_, which was very
striking. The house is about the size of our little theatre in the
Haymarket; the pit is solely occupied by the male sex, but the boxes are
filled with beautiful women, dressed in the most elegant and bewitching
manner, and adorned with brilliant ear-rings, bracelets, _&c._ The
viceroy has an elegant box in the centre of the front tiers, so as to
be immediately facing the stage, and to be seen by the whole audience.
The performance is never suffered to commence till his arrival, which is
sometimes protracted; and on his Excellency’s entrance, the whole of the
spectators rise to testify their respect for his person. The admission
to the pit is only a petack (two shillings.) The boxes are engaged by
parties, at the expense of about twelve shillings each, whether the party
is large or small; and there is no gallery. The music is excellent and
the band numerous.

Were I to attempt a minute description of the magnificent churches,
convents, and other buildings, the numerous processions, public
rejoicings, _&c._; the beautiful gardens, romantic walks, and other
objects worthy of the most scrupulous attention, which I met with in this
rich and flourishing city, as well as the various customs and manners
peculiar to its inhabitants, I should swell this work much beyond the
limits I have prescribed; but as I am inadequate to the task, I shall
leave such a subject to some abler pen; and as I only profess to write an
account of my own adventures, shall resume the thread of my narrative.

I was so much delighted with all I saw, and found the climate so
congenial to my constitution, that I could have been content to have
spent the rest of my life in South America; and hinting as much to my
kind friends, the old lady seriously pressed me to that measure, assuring
me of her protection and interest, together with that of her friends, who
were numerous and respectable. She even pledged herself to procure me a
salary of one doubloon (about £3. 12_s._) per month, at the first onset,
as clerk in a mercantile house, which would be increased as I acquired
the Portugueze language. But that longing desire to re-visit my native
country, which is predominant in the breast of every Englishman, together
with a wish to see once more my beloved relations to whom I owed so much,
prevailed over every other consideration; and I declined, but with a
proper sense of gratitude, these flattering offers of favour and service.

Since my departure from Portsmouth, in 1801, I had not heard a syllable
of or from any of my friends in England, and though it was probable that
my dear benefactors in S⸺ had ere this period paid the debt of nature,
I felt a secret hope that they might still survive, and that from the
favourable situation in which I stood with Captain King I might, at
no very distant period, find myself enabled to contribute some little
assistance towards rendering the evening of their lives happy. It was my
firm determination never again to swerve from a course of rectitude; and
I had the fullest confidence that the late governor, my patron, would
procure me the means of adhering to so laudable a resolution. How fatally
I was mistaken, how uncertain are the favours of the great, will be seen
in a future chapter.

The Buffalo having been as effectually repaired as circumstances would
admit, and a tolerable supply of provisions received on board, every
preparation was made for prosecuting our voyage, and a day appointed
for sailing. As the latter period approached, I redoubled my respectful
attentions to the worthy family in the Strada de los Mongares, (or
Monkey-street,) and they every day gave stronger proofs of their concern
at my approaching departure. The day at length arrived, and I waited on
them to take a final leave. On this occasion many tears were shed on
their part, and I confess my sensibility was such that I involuntarily
caught the soft infection. I obtained the favour of a warm embrace
from them all, and the young ladies condescended to deviate from their
usual strict decorum by suffering me to imprint some ardent kisses
on their charming lips. The mother appeared a little disconcerted at
this indulgence, but her affection for me prevented any expressions of
displeasure; she herself presented me her cheek with a very good grace.
I must here observe, that the Portugueze ladies do not allow even their
lovers, before marriage, a greater license than kissing the hand; this
intimation was given me on my first acquaintance with Donna Joaquima, by
that worthy matron herself, with a very serious air, as she discovered,
I suppose, that I evinced too much warmth in my attention to her lovely
daughters. After numerous repetitions of “Adieu” on my side, and of
“Dios guarda, mio Amigo,” (God preserve you, my friend,) on that of
these amiable females, I was obliged to tear myself abruptly from them;
and with a heart overcharged with grief and tenderness, I hastened to the
boat, which conveyed myself and the few other persons remaining on shore,
to the ship, which was then under weigh, and, the breeze freshening, we
with difficulty got alongside her, when abreast of Fort Santa Cruz, (near
the entrance of the Rio de Janeiro,) and just as the Buffalo was saluting
that battery. In about an hour afterwards, we cleared the Heads; the same
evening (August the 12th 1807,) we lost sight of the coast of Brazil, and
proceeded on our course for Europe.




CHAPTER XX.

    _The Ship becomes as leaky as before.—All hands in turn
    at the Pumps.—Means adopted to reduce the Leaks.—I offend
    the late Governor, who orders me before the Mast.—Fall in
    with the Thisbe a second time, in company with several
    Transports.—Unhappy fate of one of them.—Arrive at Spithead._


Having resumed our voyage with a favouring breeze, and the ship being, to
all appearance, tight and sea-worthy, with a pretty ample supply of wet
and dry provisions, our prospects were now a little more cheering; and I
looked forward with innate satisfaction to the moment when I should set
my foot on English ground, free from the horrors attending a state of
bondage, and at liberty to realize the ideas I had formed of atoning to
society, and to my own conscience for the manifold errors of my past life.

We had, however, the mortification to find that the repairs the ship had
undergone at Rio de Janeiro, had only produced a temporary effect; for
shortly after leaving that port, the ship again began to leak, and in
a few days made as much water as before. The consequence was that all
hands, except officers, were obliged to take their turn at the pumps,
and it was only by pumping her out every watch that she could be kept
free. I, of course, took my spell at this necessary but fatiguing labour
during the day, without murmuring; but I was not disturbed in the night,
which, indeed, I considered would have been unfair, as I was on duty all
day. The carpenter found, on inspection, that the principal leak was
occasioned by some part of the stem being loose, where there was a large
aperture some feet under water. Every exertion was made, by lightening
her forwards, and applying what is termed a fothering mat to her bows,
to remedy this evil, but without effect; for the working of the ship
occasioned every particle of the stuffing used on such occasions to wash
out immediately. This expedient, indeed, at first, promised to succeed to
admiration, for it decreased the leak from sixteen to ten inches an hour;
but the experiment was made in a calm, and the first rough weather undid
all that had been done. It was now discovered that certain parts of the
stem, called the fore-hoods, were loose, which occasioned the principal
leak; and this was so far under water, that it was impossible to repair
the defect while the ship was afloat. In fact, she was altogether in a
very decayed state, being an old ship, and having endured much severe
service; so that having now a voyage of three months before us, and
reason to expect bad weather, as we should approach the English channel
in the winter season, those who were best able to form an opinion
entertained serious doubts of the ship’s capability to perform the
voyage; however, these doubts were not suffered to transpire publicly,
and every precaution, which the experience of Captain King and his
officers could dictate, was made use of. The stem, of the vessel, being
the most defective part, was first secured, by passing very strong ropes
over her bows, and under her keel, which were then boused taut athwart
the fore-castle, and there made fast, in order to lash her bows together;
for some fears existed that by the violent working of the ship in a head
sea, her bows would absolutely part asunder! That she might be strained
as little as possible, it was also determined not to carry a press of
sail on the boltsprit when sailing on a wind. In this manner we continued
our course for several weeks, without any incident worthy of notice; we
had upon the whole pretty favourable winds, but as we approached the
equator they were interrupted by occasional calms.

On the 17th of September, we crossed the equinoctial line, with the
usual ceremonies, in which every officer and passenger cordially joined,
and not a single person (the ladies and Captain King excepted,) escaped
a complete ducking. The weather being delightfully fine, with a light
and favourable breeze, every one was in high spirits, and the rites of
Neptune having been celebrated in due form, a plentiful allowance of
grog succeeded, which, by wetting the inside, made ample amends for the
salt-water baptism, which all hands had mutually and liberally bestowed
on each other without respect to rank or persons. This was a remarkable
day with me, for on this day my original term of transportation expired.
This event naturally produced a train of reflections in my mind. I took
a retrospect of the miseries and vicissitudes I had undergone within
the last seven years, and I returned fervent thanks to Heaven for my
deliverance from exile, and for the unlimited freedom which I expected
shortly to regain. But, alas! I was soon to experience another reverse,
which, as it was both unexpected and unmerited, fell with the greater
weight upon me: and thus it happened.

Hitherto, as I have before observed, I was not called upon in the night
to take my spell at the pumps, but a few days after our crossing the
line, by what accident I knew not, I was desired by the boatswain’s mate
of the watch, to turn out in the middle of a wet and windy night, and
pump ship. As remonstrance with such a fellow as this would have availed
nothing, I complied; but the next day took an opportunity of acquainting
Captain King, and requested he would give directions that I should not be
disturbed in future. To my great surprise, however, he informed me, that
I had been called upon by his express orders, and that he was ignorant
till that very night of my being excused from the duty of pumping, but
had taken for granted that I always took my spell. I replied to this
by submitting in the most respectful terms, that as I was employed in
writing, _&c._, from morning till night, and also assisted in pumping the
ship every watch, it was but fair that I should sleep every night, as
all persons under the denomination of “Idlers” invariably do in king’s
ships. Captain King rejoined that the emergency of the case required
every one to assist; that he had given orders to have no idler or other
person excused, and that he should therefore insist on my compliance. I
observed that he grew warm towards the end of this conference, though
I had preserved the respect due to him, in all I had said; however,
as I was conscious of being in the right, I ventured to hint that the
situation in which I stood, being only a passenger not belonging to the
ship, receiving neither pay nor even the allowance of spirits common to
the meanest cabin-boy in the service, and which was essentially necessary
to support the united hardships of labour and inclement weather; that all
these considerations might, I submitted, entitle me to some distinction
from the class of persons called idlers, who actually belonged to the
ship; and I concluded with an intimation that the emergency of the
case could not be so great as that my feeble assistance could not be
dispensed with, as the ship was always freed from water with ease in
half an hour, and not one of his (Captain King’s,) domestic servants,
who were stout able men, (five or six in number,) and all receiving pay
from the ship, were ever called upon at all in the night, and but rarely
in the day. The justice of my remonstrances appeared to have exasperated
Captain King, who was of a very irascible temper, and he at length
worked himself up into a violent rage, the consequence of which was (as
usual with him,) a torrent of abuse; and as I knew by experience that
it was in vain to attempt pacifying him, when in this mood, I quitted
the cabin, and retired to my birth between decks. About an hour after,
as I was sitting on my chest ruminating on the unpleasant situation in
which I was placed, and heartily wishing for the moment which was to
free me from a state of dependence, I was accosted by a master’s mate,
who informed me it was Captain King’s orders that I should do my duty
in the larboard watch of the after-guard, and that I was to be mustered
with the watch at eight o’clock the same night. I now clearly saw the
malevolence of Captain King’s designs, and the illiberal advantage he
was about to take of my helpless and dependent situation. I nevertheless
cheerfully obeyed his orders, and that night kept what is termed the
first watch, (from eight to twelve,) two hours of which I was stationed
at the lee-wheel. At twelve o’clock I retired to my hammock, and was
no more interrupted till eight the next morning, soon after which I was
summoned to the cabin of Captain Houston, the acting commander of the
Buffalo under Captain King, who, on my appearing before him, inquired
abruptly, “if I chose to enter?” I was not surprised at this question,
as I had foreseen in what manner Captain King intended to act, in order
to place me more immediately in his power, and to give him an authority
over me, which as I was before situated he did not possess. Being,
therefore, prepared for such a question, and knowing the nature of the
service, I answered Captain Houston in the affirmative. The latter then
ordered me to attend the captain’s clerk, and get myself duly entered on
the ship’s books. This I accordingly did, and now found myself suddenly
placed in the capacity of a common sailor on board a king’s ship; and
it being war time, I had before me the disheartening prospect of being
drafted, on our arrival in England, on board some other ship, (without a
probable chance of once setting my foot on shore,) and of being perhaps
immediately ordered abroad to some foreign station from which I might not
return for several years. My motive for voluntarily entering was this: I
was aware that had I refused to do so it was in the power of Captain King
to press me against my will, and I doubt not but such was his intention.
In the latter case I should have been entered as a pressed man, which
might have operated at a future day against my obtaining leave to go
ashore, and by that means effect my escape; whereas I was now entered as
a volunteer, and became entitled to a small bounty. I am persuaded the
reader will view this conduct of Captain King’s in a very unfavourable
light; as I had really been guilty of no crime, it was taking a most
cruel and illiberal advantage of the power he had over me. Having
released me from a state of banishment, and taken me into his service on
the terms he did, without any immediate compensation, he had of course
left me every reason to expect, not only my liberty at the end of the
voyage, but also his future countenance and protection. Besides, the
reader will remember that he had declined putting me on the ship’s books
when I first joined her at Port Jackson, in which case I should have had
nine months’ pay to receive on my subsequent arrival in England, and
should have also had a daily allowance of spirits during the passage, for
want of which I had suffered much in the cold climate and severe weather
we encountered; instead of which, and after I had actually become a
free-man by servitude, he had forced me into what may be termed a second
bondage, almost equally irksome with the first, and that too when within
six weeks of the end of our voyage. However, as I am of opinion with
Shakspeare, that

    “Things without remedy should be without regard.”

I bore up with fortitude against this unexpected reverse of fortune; and,
conscious of its being unmerited, made no attempt to avert the blow by
mean submission, to which I could not stoop. I therefore cheerfully took
my watch on deck, and, when not so engaged, amused myself below with a
book, or in ruminating (as usual with me,) on the instability of human
affairs, and the vicissitudes of my own life in particular. It was not
the least of my consolations in this distress, that I received every day
at noon half a pint of excellent rum, with a dram of which I fortified
myself occasionally during the night watches, for as we approached the
channel of Old England, we once more experienced a sudden change of
climate, and the weather became intensely cold.

About a fortnight after the event I have just related, Captain King,
finding I was perfectly reconciled to my new duty, and that I offered
no apology, as he perhaps expected I would, sent for me one morning,
and ordered me to attend in the cabin every day at nine o’clock, for
the purpose of writing as usual. As I did not conceive myself justified
in refusing, I complied, and paid every attention to his commands. The
boatswain’s mates, understanding how I was again employed, desisted from
calling me up to pump ship for several nights; when by some means Captain
King hearing of this fact, actually gave orders that I should regularly
turn out as well as the other idlers. This I considered such a proof of
his determined wish to oppress and harass me, that I ventured a second
remonstrance on the subject; when he again fell into a violent rage, and
cautioned me not to offend him by a repetition of (what he termed,) my
insolence, reminding me that it was now in his power to flog me, though
it was not before!

He concluded with saying, that he left it to my choice either to write
for him during the day, and take my turn at pumping in the night, or to
do my duty before the mast entirely, and keep my watch in common with
the rest of the crew. I made no hesitation in replying, that, with his
permission, I should prefer doing my duty on deck. To this he assenting,
I made my bow and withdrew. Here ended my functions in the clerical
capacity with Captain King. From this day I never wrote a line for him;
and thus was I rewarded for my past services. To shew the inconsistency
of this treatment, I will just quote a line from the pardon granted
me by himself, when Governor of New South Wales. In documents of this
description, it is indispensably required to state the grounds, or
motives, which induce the Governor to exercise the power vested in him
by His Majesty’s instructions. The blank left for that purpose, was thus
filled up, “I, Philip Gidley King, Esquire, Captain general, _&c._ _&c._,
taking into consideration the good conduct of James Vaux, and to enable
him to serve as my clerk on board His Majesty’s ship Buffalo, Do hereby
absolutely remit, _&c._”

Just before we entered the channel, we had the singular fortune to fall
in a second time with the Thisbe frigate, in company with three sail of
transports. On speaking, we ascertained that the latter vessels had on
board a part of the army, lately under the command of General Whitelocke
in the Rio de la Plata, and who had survived the ill-managed and fatal
attack upon Buenos Ayres. We also learnt that the general himself had
been put under arrest for his deficiency and misconduct on that occasion,
and was now on his voyage home to answer for the same. Captain King now
represented to the agent on board one of these transports, the distressed
state of the Buffalo, and requested the aid of some soldiers to assist in
pumping her, as the leaks daily grew more alarming. Forty privates were
accordingly put on board us, and we continued our voyage in company with
the transports, the Thisbe having outsailed us. About the 5th of November
we made the land, which proved the coast of Cornwall, near Falmouth. We
proceeded along shore to the eastward, and on the 8th came to an anchor
at Spithead, (after a passage of nine months from port Jackson,) in
company with two of the transports, but the third was missing. We had
afterwards the melancholy information that this vessel (the John and
Elizabeth,) had been wrecked during the preceding night, having struck
upon some rocks in consequence of her keeping too near the shore; and it
blowing a fresh gale, she went to pieces, when upwards of three hundred
persons unhappily perished.




CHAPTER XXI.

    _Captain King leaves the Ship, which proceeds to Portsmouth
    Harbour.—My melancholy Reflections on my Confinement to the
    Service.—Preparations for paying off the Buffalo.—Employed by
    the Purser in arranging the Ship’s Books.—Write to London, and
    receive an answer from my Mother. Obtain leave to go ashore
    very unexpectedly, and effect my Escape through the friendly
    aid of a total Stranger._


The anchor was no sooner down, than the cutter was hoisted out, in which
Captain King went ashore and immediately proceeded post to London. The
following day the Buffalo weighed, and sailed into Portsmouth harbour,
where she was lashed alongside a hulk near the shore, and preparations
instantly made for clearing and dismantling her, preparatory to her
survey and expected condemnation. Those persons who had obtained a
passage on various accounts, and were not on the ship’s books, were now
permitted to dis-embark, and depart to their respective homes. I now felt
the full weight of the misery in which I was involved. After an absence
of nearly seven years from my native land, to enjoy once more the sight
of that much-loved spot, and when within a hundred yards of the shore,
to be debarred from a nearer approach, was mortifying in the extreme, and
my situation could only be compared to that of Tantalus in the Heathen
mythology. The purser was now busily intent upon making up the Buffalo’s
books, to be transmitted to the Navy-office, previous to her being paid,
and her crew drafted into other ships. As these accounts were extensive,
and required both care and expedition, Mr. Sherard, the purser, requested
that I would assist the captain’s clerk of the ship in their arrangement,
for which he obtained the sanction of Captain Houston, promising to
reward me for my trouble. I was now excused from all other duty, and
immediately set about the required task with alacrity, conceiving hopes
that I might by this compliance facilitate my grand object of escaping
from the ship. By dint of unremitting assiduity we completed the whole
of the accounts in about a fortnight, to the satisfaction of the purser,
and I had no sooner acquitted myself of this duty than Captain Houston
requested I would bring up his journal, which was many months in arrear.
I gladly undertook this service, from the same motives as before, and now
wrote from morning till night in the cabin, Captain King and his family
having totally quitted the ship, and taken lodgings in Portsmouth, as
had also Captain Houston and his lady. The latter officer came on board
daily, and was highly pleased at the progress I made in his journal.
Captain King also came on board occasionally, but did not deign to notice
me, and I preserved the same strangeness towards him.

Soon after our arrival, I had written to an aunt in London, for
information respecting my father, and other relations. About this time
I received, in consequence, a letter from my mother, informing me that
my father and grandmother had been deceased about two years, and that
my venerable grandfather was still living at S⸺ in health and spirits;
she added that herself and my two sisters were residing in Middle-row,
Holborn, and should feel inexpressibly happy at seeing me again. My whole
thoughts were now turned to the object of getting ashore, but the _quo
modo_ was to be considered, and of this I could form no idea. I could
not swim; I had no money to bribe a waterman to fetch me away; and of
gaining my liberty I had little or no hopes. I still continued assiduous
in writing the journal for Captain Houston and I had reason to build upon
some indulgence from the first lieutenant Mr. Oxley[46], should it rest
with him to grant leave of absence, as I had occasionally written his
log, during the voyage, and he had been pleased to shew me many marks of
kindness.

After the pay-books were completed and sent up to London, I one day had
some conversation with a respectable looking woman, who attended the
ship with a bum-boat, and supplied the sailors with necessaries on the
credit of their approaching pay, which was considerable, the ship having
been six years stationed in New South Wales. As this woman appeared to
possess some sensibility, I ventured to represent to her the distress I
was in at my confinement to the service, and particularly my fears that
I should not obtain leave to visit my friends before I was sent to sea
again. The good woman, whose name was B⸺y, had sufficient penetration to
perceive my drift, and that I wanted to take French leave of an English
man-of-war. After expatiating on the risk she should incur in case of a
discovery, and many injunctions of secrecy, she declared her willingness
to assist me as far as lay in her power, as she had, she said, children
of her own and pitied my situation. She then advised me to pack up a
suit of clothes, (which I informed her I had by me,) and commit them to
her care, saying, that she would take them privately to her lodgings,
to which she directed me, and that I must next contrive to get ashore
on duty, or by any other means, when I should immediately come to her,
and she would assist me in my further proceedings. Having treated this
worthy creature with a glass of grog, and overwhelmed her with thanks
for her disinterested kindness, (for such it certainly was,) I hastened
to put up my clothes, consisting of a genteel black coat, boots, _&c._,
which I had preserved for the purpose, and on her quitting the ship she
concealed these articles among her merchandise without observation. This
took place on a Thursday, and my only concern now, was to make good
my landing. On the following Sunday it was promulgated throughout the
ship, that a certain number of the crew were to be allowed leave to go
on shore in the afternoon. I determined, therefore, to make an effort,
and the dinner hour being over, I heard orders given to man the cutter
for the liberty-men. The latter were in the mean time busily employed in
rigging themselves for the occasion, in their best togs. I, of course,
intended to go in my working dress, consisting of a red flannel shirt,
blue jacket, and tarry trowsers, as I thought the officers would less
suspect me of a design to run away. Full of anxiety but not without
hope, I entered the gun-room, in which were Mr. Oxley, then commanding
officer of the ship, and Mr. Sherard the purser. The former inquiring
my business, I answered, that I wished, with his permission, to go on
shore for two or three hours, having a friend in Portsmouth, who I was
in hopes would supply me with some necessaries I stood in need of. Mr.
Oxley smiled and hesitated, remarking the shabbiness of my appearance;
at length on my urging my suit, with a trembling voice, (for no one
who has not been similarly situated, can conceive what I then felt,)
he inquired if he might depend on my returning on board at sun-set in
the ship’s boat? I assured him that he might, and he then consented to
my going. Having thanked him from the bottom of my heart, I quitted the
gun-room, but had no sooner closed the door than I was recalled by Mr.
Oxley. Somewhat alarmed lest he should be about to retract, I returned,
and found I was called at the instance of Mr. Sherard, who, drawing out
his purse, presented me with half-a-guinea! saying, he had promised me
something for my late assistance. I thanked him and again withdrew. I had
scarcely shut the door a second time, when I was again recalled, which
still more surprised and alarmed me. On re-entering, Mr. Oxley said, (but
in what I thought a good-natured way,) “Mind, Mr. Vaux, if you’re not
on board by six o’clock, I shall send the marines after you.” I again
promised obedience, and once more retired. I then hastened to inform a
friend of my good fortune, and gave him the key of my chest, desiring
him, in case I did not return in the evening, to take out such articles
as he chose, as well as my bedding, _&c._, before they were seized by
order of the captain. On ascending the deck I was again alarmed. The
acting master, who was on the quarter-deck, seeing me about to enter the
boat, called me aft, and inquired where I was going? I answered that
Mr. Oxley had given me leave to go ashore. He replied, “Mr. Oxley, I am
sure, would never give you leave to go ashore in that dirty dress;”
and absolutely forbad my going. It was in vain that I remonstrated,
and referred him to Mr. Oxley; and during the delay occasioned by this
conversation, the boat was on the point of departure; when, luckily, the
master turning his back to give some orders, I hastily descended to the
Waist, and leaping through one of the midship ports, found myself happily
in the cutter, at the moment when the coxswain gave the word to shove
off. I concealed myself in the foresheets until out of danger, and in
about ten minutes was landed at Common-Hard. I need not labour to paint
the joy I felt at that moment, though it was certainly mixed with anxiety
as to my further success. I immediately left the other liberty-men, who
pressed me in vain to drink with them; and pleading urgent business,
ran with the utmost expedition along the streets, inquiring for the
Point, where having arrived, I found several ferry-boats ready to cross
over to Gosport. A fellow calling out “over, Sir?” I jumped into his
boat, and in a few minutes found myself on Gosport-beach. Thus far, I
sailed before the wind; I walked up the beach, and the first object that
presented itself was the London stage-coach, standing at the door of the
Red Lion Inn. This novel sight which I had not beheld for so many years,
was so gratifying that I admired and examined it for some minutes, as
minutely as a country man would do the King’s state-coach. I soon found
on inquiry, the lodgings of Mrs. B⸺y which were at a public-house near
the Red Lion. On asking for her of the landlady, I had the mortification
to learn that she was out on board of some ship, and that her return
was uncertain. It was now near four o’clock, and the days being short,
my term of leave would soon expire. However, as there was no remedy but
patience, I entered the tap-room, and calling for a pint of ale and a
pipe, sat down to wait the arrival of my worthy friend. I had scarcely
taken a dozen whiffs when I heard a footstep in the passage of the house;
and my landlady putting out her head, inquired “Is that you, Mrs. B⸺y?” I
had the pleasure to hear that good woman answer, “Yes.” On the landlady
informing her there was a young man waiting for her, she opened the door;
and seeing me, said with a significant look, and evidently much pleased,
“O, is that you, William, step up stairs with me, and I’ll give you those
things.” I paid for my ale, and followed Mrs. B⸺y, who was accompanied
by her husband, and both of them loaded with goods they had brought from
their boat. On entering their apartment, they expressed much pleasure at
my good luck in getting ashore, and gave me the most cordial welcome. The
old woman put on the tea-kettle, and while it was boiling, she looked out
my clothes, which she set about airing by the fire. Having obliged me to
take a dram, they began to consult on the measures to be adopted in my
favour. Mr. B⸺y informed me that the coach I had seen would set out at
six o’clock; that the inside fare to London was twenty-four shillings,
and the outside seventeen shillings, inquiring, which I would prefer, and
how I stood for cash. I answered that I had about twenty-four shillings,
(namely the half guinea I had brought from New South Wales, another
which I had received from the purser, and three or four shillings I had
acquired since our arrival,) but that an outside place would answer my
purpose, and I should then have a trifle for expenses. This worthy couple
assured me I should not be lost for a few shillings, if I found myself
at all deficient; but I declined this favour, knowing I could make shift
with what I had. Mr. B⸺y then offered to go himself to the coach-office,
and secure me a place. I accordingly gave him the required sum, and
he hastened to the Red Lion. During his absence Mrs. B⸺y gave me some
warm water to wash myself, which having done, she desired me to put on
all my clothes but my coat; she then put an apron over my shoulders,
and proceeded to dress my hair as well as she could, and, for want of
powder, made use of some flour, with which she plentifully whitened my
head. Having put on my coat, she next threw some flour over my back, and
taking a view of me, declared she never saw so great an alteration in
a man. She complimented me upon my genteel appearance, and added, that
she was sure if I was met by any of my own officers, they would not know
me in this garb. Her husband now returning, informed me that he had
taken a place for me in the name of Lowe, as I directed, and had told
the coachman to take me up at the Dolphin Inn, near the extremity of the
town. Every thing being now arranged, I anxiously wished for the hour of
six; and though I had not the least grounds for fear, yet I could not
wholly divest myself of it. It is true, as I had landed at Portsmouth,
it was not likely, in case there was any suspicion, that a search would
be set afoot in Gosport, which is on the opposite side of the harbour;
besides, no inquiry was likely to be made for me, till after six o’clock,
at which hour the coach would set off. Having taken a dish of tea, and
the time approaching, I took an affectionate leave of the good woman,
promising to write to her on my arrival in town, and at a future day
to reward her kindness. The old man insisted on accompanying me to the
Dolphin, and seeing me safe off. The weather being intensely cold, they
would have pressed me to accept a great-coat, but I refused to trespass
further on their goodness. At length we departed, and walked without
interruption to the Dolphin; but I tremble at the approach of every
officer or genteel person we met, so great was my fear of miscarriage
on this important occasion. Having some minutes to wait for the coach,
Mr. B⸺y insisted on my drinking a parting glass at the bar of an adjacent
public-house, which having done, we heard the joyful sound of the horn,
and the rattling of the coach-wheels. In a few minutes I ascended the
vehicle, and as it drove off, I saw my worthy old friend waving his hand
at the corner of the street, apparently as much affected as myself on the
occasion. Having thus described my escape from a state of thraldom, in
which I might otherwise have suffered much vexation and hardship, I shall
here conclude the twenty-first chapter of my Memoirs.


END OF THE FIRST VOLUME.

Printed by W. CLOWES, Northumberland-court, Strand, London.




FOOTNOTES


[1]

    “Le bien, nous le faisons; le mal, c’est le sort;
    “On a toujours raison, le destin toujours tort.”

                                         LA FONTAINE.

[2] A genealogical account of race-horses.

[3] Two celebrated spots on Newmarket heath.

[4] Proprietor of the celebrated horse _Eclipse_.

[5] This was prior to the abolition of the Slave Trade.

[6] The small square white patches on each side the collar of a
midshipman’s coat, having an anchor button in the middle of it are
facetiously called _Weekly Accompts_, from their resemblance to a flag
hoisted by the port admiral, requiring from the ships in harbour a weekly
return of their state and condition. This flag is blue, with a white
field in the middle.

[7] In line-of-battle ships the midshipman’s birth, or cabin, is in the
cockpit.

[8] Candle.

[9] A dram of rum is here meant, to a bottle of which, it seems the youth
was applying for consolation.

[10] Alluding to the uniform of a lieutenant, which is faced with white.

[11] The ship’s corporal, whose duty it is to see all lights extinguished
at eight o’clock.

[12] His daily allowance of spirits.

[13] The lieutenant of the watch walks the weather-side; the midshipmen,
the lee.

[14] Telescope and speaking-trumpet.

[15] It appears from this that Mr. Dalton had formerly resided in London,
and been a member of that respectable corps.

[16] Receiver of stolen goods. (_Cant._)

[17] The cant name for the House of Correction, in Cold-bath-fields.

[18] A public-house near the police-office, where prisoners are confined
until their removal to prison by the officers, who seldom hurry a
_gentleman_, _if he behaves like one_, as their phrase is.

[19] Thieving.

[20] Highwaymen.

[21] Pickpockets.

[22] Housebreakers.

[23] Persons living by fraud and depredation.

[24] Pocket-books.

[25] To stand or walk in such a situation, close to the person robbed, as
to prevent passengers from noticing the depredation.

[26] Sell.

[27] To go a thieving.

[28] Thieves.

[29] Picking pockets in general.

[30] Robbing carts, or carriages, of bales, trunks, _&c._

[31] Entering a house or shop, unobserved, and stealing whatever is most
come-at-able.

[32] Shop-lifting.

[33] Secreting small trinkets of value in a shop, while pretending to
select and purchase something.

[34] Uttering counterfeit money, or forged bank-notes.

[35] Getting in at the lower windows of private houses, and robbing the
apartments of plate or other portable goods.

[36] Breaking a shop-window at night, having first tied the door to
prevent a pursuit, then snatching at any articles of value within reach.

[37] Cutting a hole in a pane of glass, without noise, in order to rob
the window of something before determined on.

[38] Defrauding errand boys, or porters, of their load, by false
pretences of various kinds.

[39] Obtaining money from charitable persons, by some fictitious
statement of distress.

[40] Obtaining goods from a tradesman by false pretences, or by a forged
order in writing.

[41] Throwing snuff in the eyes of a shopkeeper, and then running off
with such money or valuable property as may lay within reach.

[42] See the evidence of William Alderman.

[43] A short confinement is here meant.

[44] The settlement or camp at Hawkesbury, now called, the town of
Windsor.

[45] Governor King was a post-captain in the navy, and principal
commander of the Buffalo, having a second (acting) captain under him. The
Buffalo had been stationed in N.S.W. ever since the year 1802, and was
now relieved by the Porpoise, in which ship Governor Bligh arrived.

[46] Now Surveyor-General of New South Wales.




MEMOIRS OF JAMES HARDY VAUX. IN TWO VOLUMES. VOLUME II.




                                 MEMOIRS
                                    OF
                            JAMES HARDY VAUX.

                           WRITTEN BY HIMSELF.

                            _IN TWO VOLUMES._

                                 VOL. II.

                                 LONDON:
          _PRINTED BY W. CLOWES, NORTHUMBERLAND-COURT, STRAND._
                               AND SOLD BY
                       ALL RESPECTABLE BOOKSELLERS.

                                  1819.




CONTENTS OF THE SECOND VOLUME.


                               CHAPTER I.

    I arrive in London—A sudden alarm—Visit my mother
    and sisters—Set out for S⸺shire—Interview with my
    grandfather—Return to town—A lucky hit on the road—Obtain a
    situation in the Crown-Office, _page_ 1.

                                CHAP. II.

    Quit the Crown-Office, and engage as reader in a
    printing-office—Determine to live a strictly honest
    life—Meet with an old acquaintance who laughs me out of my
    resolution—Give up all thoughts of servitude, and become a
    professed thief, _page_ 13.

                               CHAP. III.

    Various modes of obtaining money—My regular course of life,
    when disengaged from my vicious companions—Meet with an
    amiable girl, like myself the child of misfortune—We cohabit
    together—Our mutual happiness, _page_ 20.

                                CHAP. IV.

    Adventures in the course of my profligate career—Motives which
    induce me to marry my companion—Her exemplary behaviour—A
    family misfortune, _page_ 29.

                                CHAP. V.

    Adventure of the silver snuff-box—Its consequences.—My narrow
    escape from transportation, which I have since had reason to
    regret, _page_ 35.

                                CHAP. VI.

    Visit Mr. Bilger, an eminent jeweller—His politeness, and the
    return I made for it—Perfidy of a pawnbroker—Obliged to decamp
    with precipitation, _page_ 52.

                               CHAP. VII.

    Take a house in St. George’s Fields—Stay at home for several
    weeks—At length I venture out in quest of money—My imprudent
    obstinacy in entering a house of ill repute, against the advice
    and entreaties of my wife—I am taken in custody and carried to
    the watch-house.—Distress of my wife on the occasion, _page_ 71.

                               CHAP. VIII.

    Discover that I have been betrayed—Examined at Bow-street, and
    committed for trial—Sent to Newgate—Prepare for my defence—My
    trial and conviction, _page_ 83.

                                CHAP. IX.

    Account of my companion and fellow-sufferer in the condemned
    cells—His unhappy fate—I receive sentence of death—Am
    reprieved, and soon afterwards sent on board the hulks—Some
    account of those receptacles of human misery, _page_ 97.

                                CHAP. X.

    I embark a second time for New South Wales—Indulgently treated
    by the Captain—My employment during the voyage—Arrive at Port
    Jackson, after an absence of four years—My reception from
    Governor Macquarrie—Assigned by lot to a settler—His brutal
    treatment of me—I find means to quit his service, and return to
    Sydney, _page_ 113.

                                CHAP. XI.

    Appointed an overseer—Determine to reform my life, and become
    a new man—All my good intentions rendered unavailing by an
    unforeseen and unavoidable misfortune—I become a victim to
    prejudice, and the depravity of a youth in years, but a veteran
    in iniquity—I am banished to the coal-river, _page_ 122.

                               CHAP. XII.

    Return to head-quarters, after an exile of two years—Renew my
    vows of rectitude, to which I strictly adhere—Proposal made me
    to obtain my liberty—I make the attempt—Its failure, and the
    consequent punishment inflicted on me—Conclusion, _page_ 137.




MEMOIRS OF JAMES HARDY VAUX.




CHAPTER I.

    _I arrive in London.—A sudden Alarm.—Visit my Mother
    and Sisters. Set out for S⸺shire.—Interview with my
    Grandfather.—Return to Town.—A lucky Hit on the Road.—Obtain a
    Situation in the Crown-Office._


About four miles from Gosport, is a place called Fareham, where is a
gate, through which on the coach passing, I had always understood that
the passengers were subject to an overhaul, as the sailors term it. I
was, therefore, somewhat alarmed during this part of my journey. I felt
confident, however, that I could give a good account of myself, had I
been questioned; but to my great joy, on our approach, the gate was
thrown open, and the coach passed without stopping. I now felt extremely
cold, and my dress being thin, I suffered much during the night. In
order to counteract the effects of the frost, I fortified myself with
a good dram of brandy at every stage, and the ensuing morning proving
delightfully fine, I at length found both my animal and mental spirits
revive, and my heart beat high with expectation of the happiness I
anticipated. About eight o’clock I was gratified with a sight of Hyde
Park Corner; and I leave the reader to imagine what transports I felt
at the difference between my then situation and that from which I had
so recently and happily emerged. On my ascending the coach at Gosport,
I had placed myself on the roof between two men who had the appearance
of country farmers, and I maintained that situation throughout the
night, by which indeed I was something benefited, for they had both
good great-coats, and we sitting rather crowded, I was warmer than I
should otherwise have been. On the coach stopping at the Gloucester
Coffee-house, Piccadilly, I expressed my intention to alight and walk;
the two farmers had the same inclination, and I observed, that if they
were going my way, I should be glad of their company. They answered they
were strangers in town, and their only object was to find out the inn
from which the Yorkshire coach set out, as they were about proceeding to
that county immediately. I replied, I was myself almost a stranger to
those matters, but I fancied the inn lay in the way I was going, and that
I would with pleasure conduct them to it. We accordingly set forwards,
and walked through Piccadilly, the Haymarket, Strand, _&c._, until we
came to Fetter-lane; and arriving at the White Horse, I was, I found,
right in my conjecture, for the York coach was among the number of those
advertised in large characters on each side the gateway of the inn. I
introduced them to the coach-office, where they took places for the
ensuing evening; and, as my night’s ride had brought me to an appetite,
I proposed (before going to my mother’s, whose lodgings were close at
hand,) that we should breakfast together; to which they assenting, I
conducted them to the coffee-room, and calling the waiter, ordered tea,
coffee, and plenty of muffins with all possible speed. We had nearly
concluded our meal, and I had just bespoke a morning paper from the
waiter, when the room beginning to fill, several gentlemen entered, and
passed the table at which we sat, proceeding to the upper end of the
room. At that moment a voice struck my ear, which almost petrified me
with fear and astonishment, for I felt persuaded at the time that it was
that of Mr. Oxley himself, exclaiming, “Waiter, see that portmanteau of
mine brought in.” On hearing these words, I almost dropped the tea-cup
from my hand, and on the impulse of the moment, quitted my seat, and
hastily left the room; nor did I stop for a moment’s reflection until I
had crossed Holborn, and found myself at the corner of Gray’s-Inn-Lane.
Then, however, conceiving I was out of danger, I endeavoured to rally my
spirits, and to persuade myself that I must have been mistaken, as it was
highly improbable that Mr. Oxley, whom I had left on board the Buffalo,
should so suddenly have arrived in town, and particularly at the White
Horse, no Portsmouth or Gosport coach setting up there. However, Mr.
Oxley’s voice and manner of speaking being a little remarkable, I was so
far in doubt that I determined not to return. What opinion the countrymen
must form of me, I know not; it is likely they would impute my unmannerly
departure to a design of avoiding payment of the reckoning. I have since
ascertained that I was mistaken in my conjecture, for Mr. Oxley did not
quit the ship until several days afterwards.

I now repaired to Middle-Row, and inquiring for my mother, was ushered
up stairs, where I found her and my two sisters pretty comfortably
situated in a genteel first floor, which they hired ready furnished.
They all expressed great joy at seeing me. My mother appeared to be in
a declining state, but my sisters were much improved, and really very
fine girls. I understood that the whole family were supported by the
industry of the latter, who worked incessantly at their needle, being
excellent proficients in fancy-work, which they obtained from various
shops. Having explained to my mother the particulars of my situation,
and the risk I had incurred by my desertion; and recollecting that
I had inconsiderately suffered her letter, in which was her address,
to be seen by several persons on board the Buffalo, it occurred to
me that Captain Houston might possibly come to the knowledge of that
particular, the consequence of which might be fatal to me. It was the
opinion of my mother, that I should on that account, absent myself from
town for a few weeks, until the affair was blown over, and my mother
advised that I should go down to my relations in S⸺shire. I accordingly
the next day set out by the coach, an aunt of mine who was in good
circumstances, supplying me with the needful. On arriving at S⸺ I went
to a public-house, which was still kept by a woman who had known me from
my infancy; as I feared to break abruptly on my aged grandfather, who
might be too much affected to sustain the surprise, I, therefore, got
the landlady to send word that a stranger had arrived, who brought news
from his grandson: having thus prepared the way, I followed in person,
and was received with transport by my dear and venerable benefactor. On
inquiring into his circumstances, I was grieved to learn that he had been
for several years obliged to subsist upon the charity of his friends,
and particularly the worthy family of the Moultries, of whom I have made
honourable mention in the second chapter of these Memoirs. I was also
concerned to find that the dear old man’s faculties were much impaired,
and my grief was heightened by the reflection that my misconduct and
consequent misfortunes had been the primary cause of his mental as well
as pecuniary distress. My other relatives in S⸺ treated me with every
mark of attention, and I was hospitably entertained by them all during
my stay in that town. It is to be observed, that only two or three of
my nearest relations were acquainted with the events of my life for the
last seven years. It was given out that I had been abroad, but it was
understood in a respectable capacity. About a fortnight after my arrival
in S⸺shire, I received a letter from my mother, informing me that no
inquiry whatever had been made respecting me, and concluding from thence
that I might with safety return when I thought proper. As no prospect
of employment presented itself in the country, it was the opinion of my
friends that I should again try my fortune in London; for which purpose
they jointly supplied me with money to defray my present expenses, and
contributed among them a few necessaries I was most in need of. I was
persuaded that my dear grandfather would not experience the want of any
reasonable comforts during the short remaining term of his life, which
could not in all probability be long protracted. I was, therefore, less
solicitous about continuing on the spot, as my presence in fact only
tended to recall to his half-distracted mind the remembrance of former
and better days. My grandfather gave me letters of recommendation to
several of his old law acquaintances, particularly one to a Mr. Belt, who
held a superior situation in the crown-office, and who had formerly been
articled to himself when resident in London.

All things being arranged, I once more took leave of my friends, and
set off by the coach for London, on the 1st of January, 1808. Having
occasion to take a fresh coach at Birmingham, and wishing to take a
little recreation, which the restraint I was under at S⸺, and the nature
of the place had hitherto precluded me from, and having the pecuniary
means of so doing in my power, I determined on devoting a few days to
that object, before I resumed my journey to London. After three days’
amusement I again took coach, and having travelled all night, we stopped
about seven in the morning at Henley-upon-Thames to breakfast. I had been
so free in my expenses at Birmingham, that I had at this time but four
shillings left in my purse. I therefore declined alighting, in order to
save the cost of a breakfast, as I had had a snack at the last stage,
and felt no inclination to eat. The other passengers having entered the
house, I remained alone in the coach, the horses being taken out, and the
coachman and guard having also quitted it. After sitting a few minutes,
it occurred to me that I had seen a number of small parcels put into
the seats of the coach, previous to our departure from Birmingham; and,
having frequently heard of large sums in bank-notes being transmitted
by this mode of conveyance to London, I was tempted to purloin one of
them, which it appeared I should run no risk in doing, as the coast was
clear, and I had a large bundle of linen, _&c._, deposited in one of the
seats. I solemnly declare that until this moment, no idea of depredation
had entered my head since my arrival in England; the act was, therefore,
perfectly unpremeditated. Without hesitation then, I opened the seat,
and taking out my bundle, untied it, in case of a surprise. As I had not
time to examine the contents of the various parcels, I determined to
trust to fortune, and therefore took out the first which came to hand. It
was enclosed in brown paper, tied with packthread, about twelve inches
by eight in size, and from its weight and hardness, I supposed it to
contain some kind of cutlery or other hardware; but as such goods were
commonly packed up with bank-notes, to prevent a suspicion of money being
enclosed, the apparent contents were a matter of indifference to me. The
parcel was directed to “Mr. ⸺, Goodge-street, Tottenham-court-road.” This
circumstance convinced me there could be no discovery of the robbery
until after I was far enough from the coach, which I intended to quit
on arriving at the Gloucester Coffee-house, as, in case I had gone on
to the George and Blue-boar in Holborn, the parcel might possibly have
been searched for, on our passing the end of Tottenham-court-road.
Having concealed my prize in my own bundle, which I replaced in the
seat, I judged it best to alight and partake of breakfast with the other
passengers. I was also in better spirits on account of the confidence I
felt, that I should find something in the parcel to recruit my slender
finances; as, let the contents be what they might, it was probable
they would produce me at least a guinea or two, which would supply my
immediate exigencies. I accordingly entered the parlour, and took a
cup of coffee with the company. The bill being called, amounted to two
shillings and three pence per head; I put down half-a-crown, which left
me in possession of eighteen pence. We then re-ascended the coach, and
resumed our journey. At three in the afternoon we entered London, and
stopping as usual at the Gloucester Coffee-house, I told the coachman I
should then leave him, as I resided in the neighbourhood. He inquired if
I had any luggage, and on my saying I had a bundle in the seat, he opened
the door and handed it to me. I gratified him with a shilling out of my
small stock, and made the best of my way. Having suffered the coach to
pass on, I followed slowly until I arrived in Holborn; but previous to
visiting my mother, I entered a public-house, being anxious to examine
my newly-acquired prize. Retiring to a private room, I cut the string
with a trembling hand, and opening the outside paper, found three several
parcels (also in brown paper,) lying one upon another. Developing the
first of these, I found it to contain, to my no small surprise and
chagrin, a quantity of fine, new ⸺ twelvepenny nails! about a hundred in
number. My hopes now fell to the ground. I was determined, however, to
see the whole; and lo! the second paper contained ⸺ the same quantity
of tenpenny nails!! The third and last, which I carelessly unfolded,
expecting nothing better, presented a number of small plated articles,
apparently designed for fixing on harness, being hooks, rings, _&c._, of
various shapes, and every one separately wrapped in fine silver paper. As
these latter articles were of no more real value to me than the nails, I
was much mortified at my ill luck, and was on the point of tying up the
whole parcel in order to throw it away as soon as I gained the street,
when it fortunately struck me that there must be somewhere, a letter or
note accompanying these goods. I, therefore, once more overhauled the
packages, and lifting up the bottom one, found under it a letter, which
on taking up, I perceived to contain an enclosure, and I plainly felt
several pieces of loose money. Now again my spirits rose—all that I had
read and heard of large sums in bank-notes being artfully transmitted
in this manner, recurred to my mind, and I eagerly drew the candle
towards me, half afraid, and yet impatient to see the event. The letter
was superscribed in the same manner as the parcel; and opening it, I
could scarce believe my eyes, when I discovered some bank-paper carefully
folded, and through which the black marks of the sum were plainly
discernible! Before I ascertained the amount, however, I proceeded to
peruse the letter, and found it to the following effect:—“Sir, I have
sent you herewith specimens of the nails and other articles; the order
shall be completed as speedily as possible. I have also enclosed you £47
9_s._ which you will find to be the present balance between us. I am,
_&c._”—Here was an unexpected windfall! The reader will conceive my joy,
and with what satisfaction I replaced the parcel in my bundle, in order
to quit the public-house. The notes proved to be two of twenty pounds
each on a Birmingham bank, but payable also at Forster, Lubbock, and
Co’s, in London, a bank of England five pound note, and another of two
pounds, also a bank dollar, and four shillings. I now repaired with a
light heart to my mother’s lodgings, where I met with a cordial welcome.
Having spent the evening with my mother, I walked into the city and
procured a bed at an inn. The next morning I sent one of my twenty pound
notes by a porter to the banking-house, where he procured small notes of
the Bank of England in exchange; I soon afterwards called myself with
the second, and did the like. Being now possessed of near fifty pounds by
this lucky hit, I determined to furnish myself with a stock of genteel
clothes, a watch, and other appendages, prior to my obtaining some
employment, as I always considered an outward appearance essential to
success in every pursuit; but I was firmly resolved never again to hazard
my liberty by a second act or attempt of a similar nature.

In a few days I had purchased such articles as were most requisite, at
the expense of about forty pounds, and I then turned my attention to
procuring a genteel situation. I accordingly waited on Mr. Belt, the
gentleman I mentioned of the Crown-office; who, on perusal of the letter
I presented, testified his respect for my grandfather’s recommendation,
and very obligingly offered to take me as an assistant clerk under his
own direction in the above office, if I thought fit to accept of a
guinea a week, which was all he could promise to allow me at first, but
might be afterwards increased. I thought this too favourable an offer
to be rejected. I, therefore, thankfully closed with it, and prepared
immediately to attend assiduously to the duties of my office.




CHAPTER II.

    _Quit the Crown Office, and engage as Reader in a Printing
    Office.—Determine to live a strictly honest life.—Meet with an
    old Acquaintance who laughs me out of my Resolution.—Give up
    all thoughts of Servitude and become a professed Thief._


I had, on my second arrival in London, engaged a small apartment in
a creditable house, and regulated my expenses upon principles of the
strictest economy; but notwithstanding every possible effort, I soon
found it impossible to subsist within my income; consequently, in a few
weeks I had sensibly decreased my little capital. I, therefore, began
to consider how I might obtain a more productive situation, as I saw no
prospect of my present salary being augmented. At this juncture I met
with an advertisement for a person of good education, to act as Reader
in a Printing Office. Though this was an employment of which I had not
the least idea, I determined to offer myself, conceiving there could be
nothing very difficult in its duties. Having, therefore, first inquired
into the nature of the latter I boldly applied to the advertiser Mr.
Barnard, on Snow-hill; and in answer to his queries, replied that I had
lately left the service of a country printer, whom I named, and was well
acquainted with the business of a printing office in general; adding,
that if he pleased to make trial of me, I doubted not of proving well
qualified for the situation in question. Mr. Barnard consented to do so;
and informing me that the salary he had given my predecessor was two
guineas a week, expressed his willingness to allow me the same. I was
so much pleased with this increase of wages, as well as with the nature
of the employment when explained to me, that I immediately quitted Mr.
Belt, and began my attendance at the office of Mr. Barnard. My business
here was to read over or examine the proofs (sheet by sheet, as they were
struck off by the pressmen) of every new work printed by my employer.
These proofs or first impressions, having been first compared with the
copy or manuscript, the errors so discovered being noted by me, were
corrected by the compositor, and a second impression produced, which was
then carefully examined, and the few errors yet remaining were rectified
as before. A third sheet was then revised by me, which in most cases
proved perfectly correct; and this being ascertained, the required number
of copies were struck off, whilst a succeeding sheet was in the hands of
the compositors, in a state of progress for the like operation. In a few
days I had a perfect knowledge of the business confided to me; and here I
found the advantages of a good education, and of my extensive reading,
which enabled me at first sight to detect many errors that an experienced
“Reader,” with a common education, would have passed over, particularly
where Latin or French phrases, quotations, _&c._, were introduced. This
soon became obvious to my employer, who expressed his satisfaction,
and paid me more than common respect. On my part I was equally pleased
with my new situation. The business of Mr. Barnard’s office was very
extensive. It employed from forty to fifty workmen in various capacities,
and he had generally ten or more different works (periodical as well as
others) in the press. Among these were some of an entertaining kind; so
that while I was performing my duty, I gratified my passion for reading,
and anticipated the public in the perusal of many curious and interesting
new publications.

I still adhered closely to my system of economy and took care to expend
something less than my income. It was my fixed determination to abstain
from every kind of dishonesty; and for about three weeks I met with
no temptation to an opposite conduct: but one day as I entered the
eating-house at which I commonly dined, I was accosted by a young man who
had come home with me from New South Wales, in the Buffalo, having been
for several years in the service of Governor King. This was, in fact,
the very person to whom I had confided my intention of deserting, and
bequeathed my effects previous to my going ashore. Our joy at meeting
was reciprocal, and before we parted an appointment to sup together the
same evening was the consequence. My old friend informed me that the
Buffalo was paid in about five days after I quitted her, and that the
crew were immediately drafted into various ships: he himself was put
on board the Diomede of 50, and having at last, with much difficulty,
obtained a liberty-ticket for eight days, he had been about a week in
town. It is needless to add, that nothing was further from his thoughts
than returning. From him I also learnt that a diligent search was
instituted for me in Portsmouth the day after my absconding, and that
Captain King, as well as his subordinate Captain Houston, were much
exasperated on the occasion. On meeting my shipmate at the appointed
place (which by-the-by, proved to be a house of ill repute) he introduced
me to several other old acquaintances, who had also come home with us,
and to a few of the same stamp, who had been a longer time returned, from
New South Wales. I soon discovered that they had all resumed the same
depredatory course of life which had caused their former sufferings, and
must inevitably entail upon them future misery and disgrace. However, as
I knew how fruitless it would be to advise or remonstrate, I contented
myself with letting them know that I had met with a tolerable situation
which enabled me to live _upon the square_, and that I had “_tied up
prigging_,” as I was determined never to be “_lagged_” again[47]. By
this communication I only incurred at the moment, a few dry jokes on my
pretended honesty, and a hint or two that I should soon become tired of
servitude, and be easily brought over to get an easy guinea. Upon the
whole, I spent a very agreeable evening, but to prevent a relapse, I
determined to avoid the company of these misguided persons in future,
notwithstanding they extracted a promise at parting, that I would meet
them again next day. This promise I scrupled not to break, and how long
I might have refrained from their society I know not; but a day or two
afterwards, as I was descending Holborn-hill in my way to the office, I
unexpectedly met my old partner and fellow-sufferer, Alexander Bromley,
whom I had left in Newgate in 1801. Having in vain made inquiry as to his
fate, since my return to England, I was truly glad to see him, for he
looked well and was genteelly dressed. I was so much altered, that when I
first accosted him, he had no immediate recollection of me, but on making
myself known, nothing could exceed the joy he evinced at our meeting.
Before we parted it was indispensable that we should drink together,
and he hastily informed me that he had served his seven years on board
the Hulks, at Portsmouth, from whence he returned to London the 17th of
September 1807, and that he was now once more under the protection of
his father, who had received him with great kindness, and was inclined,
if he continued honest, to take care of his future fortune; but added,
with a shrewd shake of the head, that he could never reconcile himself
to confinement on a shop-board, and feared he should very speedily make
a push at some higher enjoyments. Having agreed to dine together, and by
mere accident named the house at which I had lately supped as the place
of meeting, we parted with some little regret.

Bromley was punctual to his time, and during the two hours I allowed for
dinner, we became more fully informed of each other’s circumstances.
When I was on the point of leaving him to return to my duty, two or
three of my Botany-bay acquaintances dropping in, forcibly detained me;
urging that I might for once stretch a point, and spend the afternoon
with them, ridiculing with too much effect, the idea of a man like
myself being confined to certain hours like a school-boy, _&c._ As I
was somewhat elevated with the liquor I had drank, and had really no
business at the office which could not be easily deferred, I consented
in an evil moment, to join the party which was forming, consisting of
nearly a dozen persons, most of them recently returned either from the
Hulks, or New South Wales. It is needless to describe the nature of our
conversation, or the various characters of which the party was composed;
let it suffice to state (with sorrow and shame I confess it) that I was
effectually laughed out of my late good intentions; and before we parted,
had joined with the loudest of them in decrying and contemning every
species of servitude or confinement; and cordially agreed in a resolution
to live independent while I could, and to make up by every means in my
power for the privations and sufferings I had endured for the last seven
years.

From this moment I returned no more to the printing-office, but joined
myself with Bromley, and a few others, who regularly walked out every
evening in quest of money, without confining our pursuits to any
particular branch, but embracing every opportunity which offered.
These were indeed but few, and far from productive, so that I soon
grew heartily tired of the set I was associated with, and determined
to withdraw myself from them the first opportunity, and to live by the
exercise of my own ingenuity. Indeed my appearance was so much above, and
of so different a stamp from their’s, that this circumstance alone was
enough to excite suspicion, and on many accounts rendered them unsuitable
companions for me. I determined, however, not to discard poor Bromley,
for whom I felt a real friendship, on account of our former intimacy and
joint misfortunes.




CHAPTER III.

    _Various modes of obtaining Money.—My regular course of Life
    when disengaged from my vicious Companions.—Meet with an
    amiable girl, like myself, the Child of Misfortune.—We cohabit
    together.—Our mutual Happiness._


Having withdrawn myself from my late companions, I now became very
circumspect in my proceedings; and as Bromley had neither the appearance
nor the manners of a gentleman, I only made use of him occasionally in
the course of my practice, keeping him in the back ground to receive and
carry any articles which I purloined, and never suffering him to converse
with, or approach me except in private. I generally spent the mornings,
that is, from about one o’clock to five P. M. (which are the fashionable
hours for shopping) in visiting the shops of Jewellers, Watchmakers,
Pawnbrokers, _&c._ Having conceived hopes that this species of robbery
would turn to a good account, and depending upon my own address and
appearance, I determined to make a circuit of the town, and not to omit
a single shop in either of those branches: and this scheme I actually
executed so fully, that I believe I did not leave ten untried in all
London, for I made a point of commencing every day in a certain street
and went regularly through it on both sides the way. My practice was
to enter a shop and request to look at gold seals, chains, broaches,
rings, or any other small articles of value; and while examining them,
and looking the shopkeeper in the face, I contrived by slight of hand to
conceal two or three (sometimes more) in the sleeve of my coat, which was
purposely made wide. On some occasions I purchased a trifling article to
save appearances; at other times I took a card of the shop, promising to
call again; and as I generally saw the remaining goods returned to the
window, or place from whence they were taken, before I left the shop,
there was hardly a probability of my being suspected, or of the property
being missed. In the course of my career I was never once detected in the
fact, though on two or three occasions, so much suspicion arose, that I
was obliged to exert all my effrontery, and to use very high language, in
order, as the cant phrase is, to _bounce_ the tradesman _out of it_; and
my fashionable appearance, and affected anger at his insinuations, had
always the effect of convincing him that he was mistaken, and inducing
him to apologize for the affront put upon me. I have even sometimes
carried away the spoil notwithstanding what had passed, and I have often
gone a second and third time to the same shop, with as good success as at
the first. To prevent accidents however, I made it a rule never to enter
a second shop with any stolen property about me; for as soon as I quitted
the first, I privately conveyed my booty to Bromley, who was attending
my motions in the street, and herein I found him eminently useful. By
this course of depredation I acquired on the average about ten pounds a
week, though I sometimes neglected shopping for several days together.
This was not, indeed, the only pursuit I followed, but was my principal
morning’s occupation; though if a favourable opportunity offered of
getting a guinea by any other means, I never let it slip. In the evenings
I generally attended one of the theatres, where I mixed with the best
company in the boxes, and at the same time that I enjoyed the amusements
of the place, I frequently conveyed pocket-books, snuff-boxes, and other
portable articles, from the pockets of their proprietors into my own.
Here I found the inconvenience of wanting a suitable companion, who
might have received the articles I made prize of, in the same manner as
Bromley did in the streets; but though I knew many of the light-fingered
gentry, whose appearance fitted them for any company, yet, their faces
being well known to the police-officers, who attend the Theatres, they
would not have been suffered to enter the house: and herein I possessed
an advantage which many of these gentry envied me; for being just arrived
in England, and a new face upon the town, I carried on my depredations
under the very noses of the officers, without suspicion. Having,
therefore, at first no associate, I was obliged to quit the Theatre and
conceal my first booty in some private spot, before I could make (with
prudence) a second attempt. Upon the whole I was very successful in this
pursuit also, at least as to the _number_ of articles I filched, and had
their _value_ been reasonably proportionate to what I expected, I need
not long have followed so hazardous an employment. I have very frequently
obtained nine or ten pocket-books, besides other articles, in an evening;
and these being taken from gentlemen evidently of fortune and fashion,
I had reason to expect I should sometime meet with a handsome sum in
Bank-notes; but fortune did not favour me therein, for during near twelve
months almost nightly attendance at one or other of the public places,
I never found more than twenty pounds in a book, and that only on one
occasion. I several times got five, ten, or eleven pounds, but commonly
one, two, or three pounds, and most generally four books out of five
contained nothing but letters, memorandums, and other papers useless
to me. At the same time I knew frequent instances of the common street
pickpockets getting a booty of fifty, one hundred and sometimes three or
four hundred pounds. However, I never failed to pay the expenses of the
night, and if I gained nothing, I enjoyed at least a fund of amusement,
which was to me the highest gratification. It sometimes happened that the
articles I got (particularly pocket-books) were advertised by the losers,
within a few days, as “Lost,” and a reward offered for their restoration:
where this reward was worth notice, I frequently restored the property by
means of a third person whom I could confide in, and whom I previously
tutored for the purpose.

In the mean time, the manner in which I spent my life, abstracted from
the disgraceful means by which I supported myself, was (as I have
formerly hinted,) perfectly regular and inoffensive. Though I lived by
depredation, yet I did not like the abandoned class of common thieves,
waste my money, and leisure time in profligate debauchery, but applied
myself to the perusal of instructive and amusing books, my stock of which
I daily increased. I occupied genteel apartments in a creditable house,
the landlord of which understood me to hold a situation under Government,
and every part of my conduct at home tended to confirm his opinion of my
respectability. I was scrupulously exact in paying my rent, as well as
the different tradesmen in the neighbourhood, with whom I had occasion
to deal; nor did I ever suffer any person of loose character to visit
me, but studiously concealed from those of my acquaintance my place
of residence. I was sometimes, indeed, so imprudent as to resort, for
company’s sake, to some of those public-houses frequented by thieves and
other dissolute characters, the landlord of which is himself commonly an
experienced thief, or returned transport. When I had a mind to relax a
little, or grew tired of domestication, I disguised my appearance as much
as I could, and repaired to a house of this description, sometimes taking
my Dulcinea with me, whom I shall shortly introduce to the reader, and
whose person and dress I was not a little proud of exhibiting in public.
This fondness for flash-houses, as they are termed, is the rock on which
most persons who live by depredation unhappily split, and will be found
in the sequel to have brought me to my present deplorable condition; for
the police officers, or traps, are in the daily habit of visiting these
houses, where they drink with the thieves, _&c._, in the most familiar
manner; and, I believe, often obtain secret information by various means
from some parties respecting the names, characters, pursuits, _&c._,
of others. By this imprudent conduct I also became personally known to
many of the officers, which was productive of great danger to me in the
exercise of my vocation; whereas, had I avoided such houses, I might
have remained unknown and unsuspected by them for a series of years. I
ought not to omit what may perhaps gratify the reader, as much as the
act did myself, namely, that as soon as I became possessed of a moderate
sum, I remembered the kindness shewn me by the good woman at Gosport,
and wrote her a letter of thanks, enclosing a five-pound bank-note,
which, no doubt, proved highly acceptable. I also from time to time
assisted my aged mother, whose circumstances were extremely narrow, and
her support derived solely from the earnings of my two sisters, whose
success depending on the caprice of fashion and of milliners, both alike
inconstant, was but precarious. They, as well as my other relations in
S⸺shire, were indeed totally ignorant of my unhappy relapse into a life
of infamy, but believed my assertion, that I had a liberal salary from
Mr. Belt, and was still employed under that gentleman in the Crown-office.

About three months after my return to London, and whilst in the zenith
of my success, I was introduced by one of my former dissolute companions
to the acquaintance of a young woman, who, like myself, had been well
and tenderly brought up, but having been seduced by a young man equally
inexperienced with herself, to quit her friends and cohabit with him
as his wife, she had thereby forfeited the countenance of her family,
and her paramour having died after a year’s cohabitation, she had been
driven to the usual refuge in such cases, a life of prostitution. At
the period of my introduction, however, she had been only a few months
upon the town, and I clearly perceived that her mind was yet but very
slightly contaminated. As there were many reasons which rendered a female
companion in whom I could place confidence, desirable, and in fact
necessary to me; and as this young woman’s misfortunes had placed her
in such circumstances, that I had no obstacles to surmount on the score
of delicacy, I proposed to her, after a few days’ acquaintance, that we
should live together; to which, as she was heartily tired of her present
course of life, she willingly consented. She knew enough of the world
from her late experience, to surmise in what manner I obtained my living,
of which, however, to avoid all duplicity, I fully possessed her. Having
informed my landlord, that my wife, whom I had not before mentioned to
him, was arrived in town from a visit she had been paying in the country,
I accordingly took her home; and in a very few days we had arranged a
pretty snug system of domestic economy, and provided every requisite
for the family life I meant in future to live. My companion was the
daughter of an industrious mechanic, who, having a numerous offspring,
had only been enabled to give her a common education; but her mother had
instructed her in the duties of house-keeping, and she was perfectly
conversant in all the qualities requisite to form a good wife. She was
about nineteen years of age, agreeable in her person, and of the sweetest
disposition imaginable; and what was most gratifying, the company she
had latterly mixed with, and the disgusting examples before her eyes,
had not been able to eradicate an innate modesty which she naturally
possessed; so that her manners and conversation were such as fitted her
for any company to which I might be inclined to introduce her. I informed
my mother and sisters that I was on the point of contracting a union
with this young woman, and having made them personally acquainted, the
three young ladies soon became very intimate. As my mother and sisters
but rarely called at my lodgings, and then merely _en passant_, I had
no difficulty in concealing the connexion from them until I could with
propriety declare my marriage to have taken place. We had the happiness
of finding ourselves mutually pleased with each other, and I considered
my meeting with so amiable a friend as one of the greatest blessings of
my life. In a few weeks after our junction, my partner discovered evident
symptoms of pregnancy, which with her affectionate behaviour, and real
attachment to my interest, endeared her still more to me. In a word, I
now felt myself as happy as any man daily risking his liberty and life,
and exposed to the reproaches of his own conscience, could possibly be.




CHAPTER IV.

    _Adventures in the course of my profligate Career.—Motives
    which induce me to marry my Companion.—Her exemplary
    Behaviour.—A family Misfortune._


Having now settled myself in a manner much to my satisfaction, and
happily met with a faithful friend, to whom I might confide my most
secret thoughts, who would sincerely participate my joy, when success
crowned my pursuits; and who, in the hour of adversity, would condole
with, and cherish me, I applied myself with redoubled assiduity to the
acquirement of money, with a full resolution in the event of my meeting
with one good booty, or realizing by degrees a sufficient sum to quit
the hazardous course of life I had embarked in, to establish myself
in some honest line of business. To this prudent measure I was also
strongly prompted by my companion, who could not hide her fears and
anxiety on my account, and was never easy during my absence from home
on a depredatory excursion. I continued to visit the shops as usual in
the morning, and the theatres in the evening with tolerable success; and
my partner having expressed a desire to accompany me, in the hope of
rendering me service, I was induced to gratify her. As her figure and
address were both extremely prepossessing, and her air perfectly genteel,
I soon found her eminently useful; for she not only received from me the
property I purloined, but with much ingenuity would contrive to engross
the attention of the shopkeeper while I robbed his counter, or by artful
gallanting with a gentleman at a public place, facilitate my design
upon his pockets. At all times, when disengaged from these hazardous
practices, we lived a life of perfect domestic happiness, our chiefest
pleasure being centred in each other’s company.

As our mutual affection increased, my companion, whom I had informed
of the outlines of my past life, and who was aware of the dangers to
which I was daily exposed, being filled with tender fears of losing
me for ever, and prompted by sincere affection, suggested the idea of
uniting ourselves indissolubly by marriage; in the hope that should I
unhappily experience a reverse of fortune, and be again banished from
my native country, she might obtain permission to share my misery, and
contribute, by her society, to lessen my sufferings. This proposal so
fully convinced me of her undisguised attachment, and had so much reason
on its side, that I gave into it with ardent pleasure; and the necessary
preliminaries being adjusted, we were accordingly married at St. Paul’s,
Covent-Garden, on the 21st of July, 1808, her mother, to whom she had
become reconciled, and who (judging by appearances,) had a favourable
opinion of the match, assisting at the ceremony.

Soon afterwards, I communicated the event to my mother, informing her
that weighty reasons had rendered it necessary to observe privacy on
the occasion; and hinting to the unsuspecting old woman, that I had
acquired by this marriage, a considerable pecuniary advantage. This
intimation gave my mother great pleasure, and I took care by increased
liberality towards her and my sisters, to confirm them in the opinion of
my veracity. The behaviour of my wife became every day more exemplary;
and had I been free from that remorse which must ever accompany a guilty
life, and enabled to procure those necessary comforts which I knew so
well how to enjoy, by upright means, I should have considered myself
supremely happy. In the beginning of the month of October, my wife,
who was far advanced in her pregnancy, accompanied me one evening to
Drury-lane theatre; and the performance being over, we were descending
the stair-case from the box-lobby, when I attempted to possess myself of
a gentleman’s pocket-book; but by some accident he suspected my design,
and publicly accused me therewith. Unfortunately several other gentlemen,
who had been robbed in the course of the evening, being on the spot, and
beginning to compare notes, agreed unanimously that they recollected
my person as being near them about the time they were robbed, and did
not scruple to insinuate that I ought to be detained and searched. This
conversation naturally attracted the attention of the company immediately
round us; but while it took place, all the parties were obliged by the
pressure of the throng behind to continue descending, and we in fact
quitted the theatre all together. Being arrived in Little Russell-street,
the gentlemen surrounded me to the number of about a score, and
our altercation became loud and vehement. Fortunately for me no
police-officers happened to be near the spot; for although I had nothing
to fear from a search, yet the circumstance would have made me personally
known to the latter, and would of course operate to my disadvantage on my
future appearance at the theatre. I exerted every art of expostulation,
and finally had recourse, on my part, to threats, affecting to feel
highly insulted by their insolent insinuations; declared myself a
gentleman of character, which I would prove to their cost; offered to
give my card of address, or to retire to a coffee-house, and send for
respectable persons who knew me, but all my rhetoric proved ineffectual;
some were for giving me in charge to an officer; others still more
violent were for having me pumped. At this moment a person named G—ge
W—k—n, now in this colony, who had been himself exercising his vocation
in the pit of the theatre, happened fortunately to come up, and seeing a
crowd collected, stopped to ascertain the cause. He immediately perceived
the critical situation in which I stood, and having the appearance of a
man of fashion, he stepped forward, and hearing the various motions of
my persecutors, strongly advised them to forbearance, and caution how
they treated a gentleman, as I evidently appeared to be; urging that
they must certainly be mistaken in their conjectures, that my proposal
of giving my address, or a reference, ought to be sufficient, and
particularly dwelt on the impropriety of taking the law into their own
hands. These arguments of my friend W—k—n carried so much weight, that
the gentlemen began to waver and grow less clamorous; till at length they
dropped off one by one; and W—k—n, assuming a haughty tone, said, taking
me by the arm, “Come, Sir, you have been sufficiently exposed, and long
enough detained on a charge which I am confident there is no foundation
for; allow me to conduct you from this spot; if you are going towards
St. James’s, I shall be glad of your company, and let me see (raising
his voice and cane together,) who will dare to insult you further.” So
saying, he led me away in triumph, tipping the wink to my poor wife, who
had stood all the while at a small distance, much terrified and agitated
by various emotions, which so much affected her, that though we lived
within two hundred yards of the theatre, she had scarcely power to walk
home; and we had no sooner quitted our kind conductor, who attended us
to the door, than she fainted away, and was for sometime insensible. The
consequences of this untoward event were still more seriously afflicting,
for her tender constitution was not proof against the shock, and she was
the next day prematurely delivered of a male child, which, however, only
lived eight hours, and was a subject of infinite regret to us both.




CHAPTER V.

    _Adventure of the Silver Snuff-box.—Its Consequences.—My narrow
    Escape from Transportation, which I have since had reason to
    regret._


Happening soon after the adventure at Drury-lane, to read an
advertisement, stating that a meeting of the freeholders of the county
of Middlesex would be convened on the 11th of November, at the Mermaid
Tavern, Hackney, to consider of the expediency of petitioning the Throne
on the subject of parliamentary reform, it struck me that I might find
it worth while to attend this meeting, as it would probably attract a
large concourse of people, and, as at such assemblies riots and much
confusion frequently occurred, which afforded a favourable opportunity
for plundering the pockets of the company. On the day appointed, I
accordingly left town in one of the Hackney stages, and arriving at
the Mermaid about one o’clock, found the sheriffs had just opened the
business of the meeting, which was held in a large room commonly used
as an assembly-room for dancing, and detached from the tavern itself.
To my disappointment, however, there were not above three hundred
persons collected, and the building being very spacious, there was
not the least prospect of any violent pressure taking place. Before
I commenced my operations, I entered a small house called “The Tap,”
immediately contiguous to, but distinct from, the Mermaid; and going
into a parlour, called to the landlady, a decent looking elderly woman,
for a glass of brandy and water, and a pipe. Having taken and paid for
this refreshment, I proceeded to the meeting; and found, so far from any
tumult or uproar, that the whole company were collected at one end of the
room, and listening in profound silence to the speech of some popular
and patriotic orator, who was warmly censuring the conduct of ministers,
and advocating the cause of liberty. I now entered the thickest part of
the crowd, and having tried the pockets of a great many persons without
feeling a single pocket-book, I at length extracted successively two
snuff-boxes from different gentlemen; but their coats being buttoned up,
and the pockets inside, I was obliged to use my scissors in cutting the
bottom of each pocket, before I could obtain the desired prizes. This
trouble and risk I should not have incurred had not I assured myself
that the boxes from their shape, _&c._; were both silver; but to my
mortification, they proved on inspection, the one wood, and the other a
sort of japanned leather, though both perfectly genteel, and mounted with
silver: however, as they were of no intrinsic value to me, I threw them
away; and, although it was rather imprudent, I entered the room a third
time, in hopes of better success. I soon found myself standing behind a
well-dressed man, who was wrapped in deep attention to the speaker, and
perceived to my great joy that he had a small leather pocket-book in
his inside coat-pocket, and also a very fine large snuff-box, evidently
silver, from its shape and weight. I had again recourse to my scissors,
and having made an incision, extracted the contents of the pocket, with
which I hastily retired: but I was again partially disappointed, for I
found that what I had taken for a pocket-book, was in fact merely a pen
and ink-case: the box, however, was a very elegant one, and quite new.
Although it appeared that I was not destined to be very fortunate in this
day’s adventure, I determined to make one other trial; but as it would be
dangerous to keep the stolen box about me, and I saw no convenient spot
in which to conceal it, I adopted the following method to dispose of it,
while I made my final attempt in the assembly-room. Going into the little
tap-house before described, I addressed the landlady, inquiring if she
sold any snuff, or could without inconvenience, procure me a little. She
answered that she had none, but would get me some in a very short time.
I thanked her, and replied that as I was anxious to hear the debates in
the assembly-room, she would oblige me by procuring an ounce of rappee,
for which purpose I handed her the box I had just obtained, saying I
would call for it in a quarter of an hour. Having now, as I conceived,
effectually and safely deposited my prize, I left the Tap with an
intention of re-entering the meeting-room; but suddenly changing my mind,
I determined to desist, having by the box alone secured the expenses of
my journey, and to return immediately home. However, as I felt hungry,
and saw no signs of accommodation for eating in the Tap, I proceeded a
little way up the street, till I came to a sort of cook’s-shop, where
I procured a lunch, and then returned to reclaim my snuff-box from my
obliging old landlady, having been absent from her barely a quarter of
an hour. Going boldly up to the little bar in which she sat, I inquired
if she had procured me the snuff; she replied that she had, and turning
round to a cupboard behind her, produced the box, which I held out my
hand to receive; but, to my utter confusion, I was prevented by the
gentleman himself, from whom I had stolen it, who, starting from a dark
corner of the passage close to my elbow, where he had been concealed,
received the box in his hand, and turning to me, inquired in a peremptory
tone, if that was my snuff-box? I answered with a smile, “No, Sir, it
is a box that I found—if you have any claim to it, it is much at your
service.” He then inquired where I had found it; I replied, that going
to make water in a corner of the stable-yard, I perceived something
shine amongst some rubbish, which taking up, I found to be the box in
question; that I was myself in the habit of taking snuff, and having that
day left my own box at home, I thought it a good opportunity of getting a
supply; that I had therefore commissioned the landlady to procure me some
snuff, and left her this box for that purpose. The gentleman rejoined,
that he had been robbed of the box in the assembly-room, and that having
found it in my possession, he felt it incumbent to detain me, on strong
suspicion of being the thief. All I could urge, and every art I tried,
were ineffectual to convince this rigid gentleman of my innocence, and
several others joining him, one of them asked my name and situation in
life. I answered, that when charged with so disgraceful an act as that of
picking pockets, I should certainly decline giving such explanation; but
that I should at a proper season, be enabled to refute the accusation,
and prove my respectability. To this the inquirer replied, that although
himself a justice of peace, he certainly had no wish to extort, nor was
I obliged to give any answers against my inclination, and that upon the
whole, he could not censure me for preserving silence; however, as the
property stolen had been traced to me, it became his duty and that of the
owner, to have me detained till I gave an account of myself. A constable
being called in, was now desired to search me, which he proceeded to
do, and the first thing he found was a pair of small scissors without a
sheath, in my breeches-pocket, where I had in my hurry deposited them
after cutting out my last booty. The constable exhibited these with an
air of triumph, exclaiming to the by-standers, “See, gentlemen, here
are the tools the pocket was cut with!” He also took from me about
fifty shillings in loose money, a pocket-bock, card-case, pair of
silver spectacles, a two-bladed knife, silver pencil-case, tobacco-box,
handkerchief, gloves, _&c._, all my own property, and such as I usually
carried about me. I had left my watch at home, which, it being a valuable
one, I was frequently persuaded by my wife to do when I went upon such
excursions as the present. The meeting being by this time dissolved, the
loser of the box set off on his return to town, and I was left in charge
of two constables who were to follow with me. In about an hour, a coach
being obtained, I was conveyed to Worship-street office for examination,
where I arrived at six in the evening, just as the magistrate had taken
the chair. This worshipful justice was Joseph Moser, esq., a gentleman
of an eccentric character, and the same, if I mistake not, whose name I
have frequently met with in print, as the author of many well-written
and humorous essays, _&c._, in periodical works. Being placed at the
bar, the prosecutor, who proved to be a Mr. Imeson, tobacconist, in
Holywell-lane, Shoreditch, made his appearance in the same coat he had on
in the morning, and exhibiting his pocket, through the bottom of which
he thrust his hand by way of demonstration. He stated, that he was that
day attending the meeting of freeholders at Hackney, and while listening
to the debates in the assembly-room, he had occasion to take snuff;
when putting his hand in his pocket, he found the bottom of it cut,
apparently with a sharp scissors, and not only his snuff-box, but every
other article taken out; that he was sure the depredation was recent, as
he had taken snuff but a few minutes before, and had not since changed
his position: that he staid to hear the conclusion of the business, and
on leaving the room, was relating his loss to some gentlemen in the
inn-yard, and that a little boy happening to overhear him, stepped up and
said, “Sir, my mother has got a pretty snuff-box, that a gentleman gave
her to put some snuff in;” on which he was induced to accompany the child
to its parents, where, requesting to see the box, he found it to be his
own; that he had then taken the measures for my detection, which I have
above related. The landlady, Mrs. Andrews, was then sworn, and stated my
coming to her house, taking some refreshment, and afterwards returning to
inquire for snuff, leaving her the box, _&c._, all which, she said was
transacted in the most public manner; and, the good woman voluntarily
added, that she could never suppose I should have acted as I had done,
had I been the person who stole the box. The officer who had searched me,
now produced the articles taken from my person, not forgetting to dwell
upon the circumstance of the open scissors, the sheath of which he found
in another pocket. The magistrate viewing these articles with attention,
observed, that he had no doubt of their being all stolen, and ordered
them to be advertised in the daily papers, and that I should be brought
up again on that day week, when it was probable the persons who had lost
such articles, would attend to identify them. As to the present charge,
he said the case was clear enough, and he would, to save further trouble,
bind over the parties to prosecute at once. Then addressing me, his
worship inquired my name, place of abode, _&c._ I answered, that my name
was James Hardy, but I must beg to decline giving any further account
of myself, as it appeared his worship was determined to commit me for
trial, and I should therefore not trouble my friends until a future day.
Mr. Moser now remarked on some of the articles found upon me, inquiring
with a sarcastic grin, how long I had worn barnacles? As to the knife,
he said it was evidently a thief’s knife; and turning to Armstrong, one
of his officers, he asked him, if that was not such a blade as they used
for _starring a glaze_? The knife and scissors, his worship called my
working-tools. It was in vain I assured this facetious justice that
these things were my own lawful property, and offered to prove where I
had purchased them all: he insisted on detaining them, and was hardly
persuaded to return the money taken from me. I was then committed to New
Prison, Clerkenwell, to which I was conveyed about nine o’clock at night.
Arriving there, I desired to be accommodated between-gates, and after
paying the usual fees, _&c._, I was conducted to a bed in the same room I
had occupied on a like occasion, in the year 1800. Having now leisure to
reflect on the occurrences of the day, I began to consider my situation
hopeless enough; the snuff-box having been traced to me, the circumstance
of the pocket being cut, the scissors found, _&c._, altogether furnished
a chain of evidence, too strong, I feared, to be overruled by my bare
assertion, that I had found the property; a defence the most flimsy,
but the most commonly resorted to. I, therefore, laid my account with
being transported at least. What heightened my present distress was,
that my poor wife would be grievously alarmed at my not returning home
this night; and it would be a difficult matter, even the next day, to
inform her of my situation, as I knew the officers were intent upon
discovering, if possible, my place of abode, in order to ascertain my
character, and mode of life. The morning being come, I was fortunate
enough to meet with an intimate acquaintance, by whom I despatched a
message to my wife, requiring her to visit me immediately, and in an
hour’s time, I had the pleasure of seeing her appear. Her distress may
be easily conceived. I comforted and encouraged her as well as I could;
and giving her a strict caution not to suffer herself to be followed or
watched in her return, desired she would wait with patience, and hope
for the approach of the session, which would decide my fate. During the
interval of my second examination, I read the following advertisement
inserted by the officers of Worship-street:—“Stopped upon a suspicious
person now in custody, the undermentioned articles, supposed to be
stolen; [here they were all minutely described.] Any persons having lost
such goods, are desired to attend at this office on Friday next, when
the said person will be brought up for re-examination, _&c._” On the
18th of November, I was accordingly reconducted to Worship-street, my
wife being permitted to accompany me in the coach. Being again brought
before Mr. Moser, that gentleman inquired if any body was in attendance
to claim the property found on me; and being answered in the negative,
he expressed himself confident that claimants would appear, but said he
would, however, finally commit me to Newgate, and, that the articles
in question should be detained until the day of my trial; when, if not
owned before, the court would no doubt restore them on my application;
nor could all my asseverations or arguments convince him of the property
being my own, or induce him to alter his decree respecting them. I was
accordingly conducted to Newgate, accompanied by my wife, whose uniform
attention to me in this and every other distress, proved the sincerity of
her attachment.

As the session was to commence on the 30th, I had no time to lose in
preparing for my trial. I, therefore, drew up a brief for counsel, in
which I dwelt strongly on the open and public manner in which I had acted
with Mrs. Andrews; the improbability that I should have taken so much
trouble, had I been the thief who stole the box, full of snuff, as the
prosecutor described it to have been, and on every other point which I
thought might prove of moment, or afford the counsel an opportunity of
shewing his wit or ingenuity, but still deceiving even him, by stoutly
adhering to my first story of finding the property. This brief I sent
by my wife, with the usual fee, to Mr. Knapp, a gentleman, of whose
abilities I entertained a high opinion. Notwithstanding all this, I had
at the bottom, very little hopes of escaping conviction; and persons
best experienced in such matters, who heard the circumstances, declared
nothing but a miracle could save me. I, however, concealed these
unpleasing ideas from my wife, and assured her that I felt confident of
being acquitted. The grand jury being met, I soon heard that a true bill
had been returned by them; and, on the following Wednesday, the court
opening, I was taken down for trial, but was not put to the bar until
Friday the 2d of December. Previous to my leaving the ward of the prison
in which I lodged, a fellow-prisoner, with whom I had become intimate,
knowing the circumstances of my case, and the nature of my intended
defence, had in a half-jocular manner, offered to lend me his snuff-box,
which he advised me to display to the court, and occasionally to take
a pinch from it during my trial; this he observed, would strengthen my
assertion that I was in the habit of using snuff, and give a colour to
my defence; and, he good-naturedly added, that he hoped it would prove
lucky to me. I thankfully accepted the proffered favour, of which I did
not fail to make use at the proper season. Being arraigned at the bar,
I stood capitally indicted for stealing a silver snuff-box, value two
pounds, the property of Thomas Imeson, privily from his person. Mr.
Imeson having given his evidence, my counsel in cross-examining him said,
“I take for granted, Sir, you can’t take upon yourself to swear, whether
you were robbed of your snuff-box, or whether it fell through the hole in
your pocket; all you know is, that you found your pocket torn, and the
box among other articles missing?” _Answer_, “Certainly I cannot.” The
landlady then stated in a faltering voice, and evidently much embarrassed
at being examined before so large an assembly, the manner in which I
had applied to her, _&c._, and in answer to a question from Mr. Knapp,
said, that she could never suppose I should have acted in the open manner
I did, if I had stolen the box. The constable who searched me was the
next witness; and he having described that proceeding, and produced the
articles found upon me, the Recorder, who presided on the bench, said,
“I suppose, Mr. Bell, there were a great variety of characters attending
this meeting, which was held for the purpose of obtaining parliamentary
reform?”

_Ans._ “Certainly, my lord.”

_Recorder._ “No doubt there were many persons, freeholders as well as not
freeholders?”

_Ans._ “Yes, my lord.”

_Recorder._ “I dare say people of all descriptions, tag-rag, and bobtail?”

_Ans._ “There might, my lord.”

I now began to entertain strong hopes, perceiving that the tide of
prejudice ran in my favour. I was dressed in a very genteel but becoming
manner, and had not the least appearance of a thief. I had put on the
most modest air and countenance I could assume, and I thought the court
and jury appeared to view me with favourable eyes. I, therefore, took
another pinch from my friend’s box, and waited the event with patience,
being prepared with a good defence, when called upon to make it. But I
was not put to that trouble; for the Recorder addressing the jury, said,
“Gentlemen, I must in this stage of the trial, deliver it as my opinion,
that I cannot see any grounds for charging the prisoner with felony.
Gentlemen, the accident of finding a snuff-box might have happened to one
of yourselves, to me, or to any other honest man; and, it would be hard
indeed if such an accident should subject the finder to a prosecution for
felony. If you are of my opinion, it will be unnecessary to recapitulate
the evidence, or put the prisoner upon his defence.” His Lordship then
paused, and I leave the reader to imagine the state of suspense I was for
some moments in. The jury having whispered together, one of them stood up
and said, “My lord, we wish to ask a question of Mrs. Andrews, namely,
whether at the time the prisoner brought her the box, he delivered it
as his own, or said he had found it?” Mr. Knapp eagerly catching at
this question, desired Mrs Andrews to stand up, and said to her, “Mrs.
Andrews, the jury wish to ask you whether the young man at the bar told
you it was his own snuff-box, or whether he said he had found it?” The
poor simple woman, confused and trembling, and not comprehending the
drift or importance of the question, answered in a low voice, “He said he
had found it, gentlemen.” Mr. Knapp having obtained this answer, with
a smile, or rather laugh of satisfaction, turned to the jury, repeating
her words, “He said, he had found it. I hope, Gentlemen, you are now
satisfied.” He then folded up my brief, and handed it to an officer of
the court, to whom he made a motion with his hand to return it to me. I
received it with a respectful bow of acknowledgment, and Mr. Knapp threw
himself back in his seat, and began playing with his watch-chain, as much
as to say, “the business is settled, I have successfully done my duty,
and saved my client;” and, so indeed he had, for the foreman immediately
pronounced the welcome verdict of “Not Guilty.” There is one circumstance
to which my acquittal on this occasion may be in a great measure imputed;
namely, that I was fortunately not known by any of the turnkeys or
officers of the court, who never fail when an old face appears, to give
a private intimation to the judge, if (which is very rare) he should
not himself recognise the party. I now applied to the court for the
articles taken from me, which the Recorder ordered to be restored; but
first expressed a wish to view them, saying to the constable, “Let me
look at those articles, Mr. Bell, there is nothing remarkable in them
I suppose.” The malicious constable answered, “No, my lord, without it
is the scissors.” The Recorder, having minutely examined them, replied
“I see nothing extraordinary in _them_ neither, Mr. Bell, except that
they appear to be remarkable good ones—poo, poo, let the young man have
his property by all means:” on which the fellow, evidently chagrined,
delivered the whole into my hands. As to the snuff-box, his Lordship
observed, there could be no doubt but it was the same which Mr. Imeson
had lost, though he could only speak to its identity, as being of the
same pattern, having bought it but a few days before the accident, and
there being no mark which he could know it by: he was, therefore, ordered
to retain it. I then bowed with gratitude to the court and jury, and with
respect to the auditors, and quitting the bar, had my irons knocked off,
and was received with open arms by my dear wife, who had been waiting
the issue in anxious suspense, accompanied by my friend Bromley. We all
three returned to the prison, where I had left some little matters,
and every one was astonished at my acquittal. I restored the borrowed
snuff-box to my kind friend, not forgetting to acknowledge its beneficial
effects by a present to himself, and a liberal treat to the whole ward. I
afterwards sent for a coach, in which myself, my wife, and old companion,
were driven to my lodgings in Duke’s-court, Drury-lane; and, I need not
add, that we spent the remainder of the day in festivity, and heartfelt
satisfaction. To account for my absence from home, my wife had informed
the landlord, that I had met with an accident while at a friend’s house
a few miles from town, and could not be removed until I was perfectly
recovered. Notwithstanding I blessed Heaven for this fortunate escape,
which I had so little reason to expect, and thought myself supremely
happy in recovering my liberty; yet I have ever since regretted that I
was not then convicted, as there is little doubt but the capital part of
the charge would have been done away with, and I should only have been
transported for seven years, consequently, at the period of my writing
these Memoirs, I should have had only a few months to serve before I
became a free-man; whereas the sequel will shew that I was in a short
time afterwards cast for death, and now find myself in the hopeless and
deplorable situation of a prisoner for life!




CHAPTER VI.

    _Visit Mr. Bilger, an eminent Jeweller.—His Politeness, and
    the Return I made for it.—Perfidy of a Pawnbroker.—Obliged to
    decamp with Precipitation._


The next adventure I shall have occasion to relate, more fully confirms
the justice of the remark, that the connexions formed by persons during
temporary confinement in a jail, commonly lead to further acts of
wickedness, and frequently entail on the parties a more severe punishment
than that which they have just escaped. This was exactly my unhappy case,
and I now come to the most fatal era of my eventful life.

In the same ward with myself were confined two brothers, very genteel
young men, who had been recently cast for death for privately
stealing some valuable rings, _&c._, from the shop of a Jeweller in
Leadenhall-street. As a conformity of character, or similarity of
pursuits, is the strongest source of friendship, so these persons and
myself had become very intimately acquainted. In the course of our
frequent conversations on the subject with which we were all three alike
most conversant, the brothers informed me that they had, like myself,
made a successful tour of the jewellers’ shops in London; and on our
comparing notes as to the particular persons we had robbed, or attempted
to rob, they pointed out about half a dozen shops, which, it appeared,
I had omitted to visit, arising either from their making no display of
their goods, or from their being situated in private streets, where I had
no idea of finding any such trades. Though at that time neither they nor
myself entertained much hope of my acquittal, it was agreed that in the
event of my being so fortunate as to recover my freedom, I should pay my
respects to the several tradesmen I had so overlooked; and I promised, in
case I was successful, to make them a pecuniary acknowledgment in return
for their information. At the moment of my joyful departure from Newgate,
they accordingly furnished me with a list of the shops in question, and
gave me full instructions and useful hints for my guidance therein.
They particularly pointed out Mr. Bilger, a goldsmith and jeweller of
the first eminence in Piccadilly. This gentleman, they assured me, I
should find, in the technical phrase, a _good flat_. They advised me to
bespeak a diamond ring, or similar article, and to request a sight of
some loose diamonds for the purpose of selecting such stones as I might
wish to have set, informing me that he was generally provided with a
large quantity, which he would not fail to shew me, and that I might
with ease purloin a good number of them. A day or two after my release,
I made the prescribed experiments, and was fortunate enough to succeed
pretty well at nearly every shop, but I reserved Mr. Bilger for my final
essay, as he was the principal object of consideration, and from whom I
expected to obtain the most valuable booty. On the day se’ennight after
my trial at the Old Bailey, I prepared in due form to pay him a visit.
About five o’clock in the evening, I entered his shop, dressed in the
most elegant style, having a valuable gold watch and appendages, a gold
eye-glass, _&c._ I had posted my old friend and aid-de-camp, Bromley,
at the door, in order to be in readiness to act as circumstances might
require, and particularly to watch the motions of Mr. Bilger and his
assistants on my quitting the premises. On my entrance Mrs. Bilger issued
from a back-parlour behind the shop, and politely inquiring my business,
I told her I wished to see Mr. Bilger; she immediately rang a bell, which
brought down her husband from the upper apartments. He saluted me with
a low bow, and handed me a seat. I was glad to find no other person in
the shop, Mrs. Bilger having again retired. I now assumed the air of a
Bond-street lounger, and informed Mr. Bilger that I had been recommended
by a gentleman of my acquaintance to deal with him, having occasion
for a very elegant diamond ring, and requested to see his assortment.
Mr. Bilger expressed his concern that he happened not to have a single
article of that description by him, but if I could without inconvenience
call again, he would undertake in one hour to procure me a selection from
his working-jeweller, to whom he would immediately despatch a messenger.
I affected to feel somewhat disappointed, but looking at my watch, after
a moment’s reflection, I said, “Well, Mr. Bilger, I have an appointment
at the Canon coffee-house, which requires my attendance, and if you will
without fail have the articles ready, I may probably look in a little
after six.” This he promised faithfully to do, declaring how much he felt
obliged by my condescension; and I sauntered out of the shop, Mr. Bilger
attending me in the most obsequious manner to the outer door. After
walking a short distance, Bromley tapped me on the shoulder, and inquired
what conduct I meant next to pursue; for he had viewed my proceedings
through a glass-door in the shop, and saw that I had not executed my
grand design. I related to Bromley the result of my conversation with Mr.
Bilger, and added that I meant to retire to the nearest public-house,
where we could enjoy a pipe and a glass of negus until the expiration of
the hour to which I had limited myself. We accordingly regaled ourselves
at a very snug house, nearly opposite Bilger’s, until about half after
six, when I again repaired to the scene of action, leaving Bromley, as
at first, posted at the door. Mr. Bilger received me with increased
respect, and producing a small card box, expressed his sorrow that his
workman had only been enabled to send three rings for my inspection, but
that if they were not to my taste he should feel honoured and obliged in
taking my directions for having one made, and flattered himself he should
execute the order to my satisfaction. I proceeded to examine the rings he
produced, one of which was marked sixteen guineas, another nine guineas,
and the third six guineas. They were all extremely beautiful, but I
affected to consider them as too paltry, telling Mr. Bilger that I wanted
one to present to a lady, and that I wished to have a ring of greater
value than the whole three put together, as a few guineas would not be
an object in the price. Mr. Bilger’s son, who was also his partner, now
joined us, and was desired by his father to sketch a draught in pencil
of some fancy rings, agreeable to the directions I should give him. The
three rings I had viewed, were now removed to the end of the counter next
the window, and I informed the young man that I wished to have something
of a cluster, a large brilliant in the centre, surrounded with smaller
ones; but repeated my desire that no expense might be spared to render
the article strictly elegant, and worthy a lady’s acceptance. The son
having sketched a design of several rings on a card, I examined them with
attention, and appeared in doubt which to prefer, but desired to see
some loose diamonds, in order to form a better idea of the size, _&c._,
of each ring described in the drawing. Mr. Bilger, however, declared he
had not any by him. It is probable he spoke truth: or he might have lost
such numbers by shewing them, as to deter him from exhibiting them in
future. Without having made up my mind on the subject, I now requested
to see some of his most fashionable broaches or shirt-pins. Mr. Bilger
produced a shew-glass, containing a great variety of articles in pearl,
but he had nothing of the kind in diamonds. I took up two or three of the
broaches and immediately _sunk_ a very handsome one marked three guineas,
in my coat sleeve. I next purloined a beautiful clasp for a lady’s waist,
consisting of stones set in gold, which had the brilliancy and appearance
of real diamonds, but marked only four guineas. I should probably have
gone still deeper, but at this moment a lady coming in, desired to look
at some ear-rings, and the younger Mr. Bilger immediately quitted his
father to attend upon her at the other end of the shop. It struck me
that now was my time for a decisive stroke. The card containing the
diamond rings, procured from the maker, lying very near the shew-glass
I was viewing, and many small articles irregularly placed round about
them, the candles not throwing much light upon that particular spot, and
Mr. Bilger’s attention being divided between myself and the lady, to
whom he frequently addressed himself, I suddenly took the three rings
from the card, and committed them to my sleeve to join the broach and
lady’s clasp; but had them so situated that I could in a moment have
released and replaced them on the counter, had an inquiry been made for
them. I then looked at my watch, and observing that I was going to the
theatre, told Mr. Bilger that I would not trouble him any further, as
the articles before me were too tawdry and common to please me, but that
I would put the card of draughts in my pocket-book, and if I did not
meet with a ring of the kind I wanted before Monday or Tuesday, I would
certainly call again and give him final directions. I was then drawing
on my gloves, being anxious to quit the shop while I was well; but Mr.
Bilger, who seemed delighted with the prospect of my custom, begged so
earnestly that I would allow him to shew me his brilliant assortment of
gold watches that I could not refuse to gratify him, though I certainly
incurred a great risk by my compliance. I, therefore, answered, “Really,
Mr. Bilger, I am loth to give you that unnecessary trouble, as I have,
you may perceive, a very good watch already, in point of performance;
though it cost me a mere trifle, only twenty guineas; but it answers
my purpose as well as a more valuable one. However, as I may probably,
before long, want an elegant watch for a lady, I don’t care if I just
run my eye over them.” Mr. Bilger replied, that the greater part of his
stock were fancy watches adapted for ladies, and he defied all London
united to exhibit a finer collection. He then took from his window
a shew-glass, containing about thirty most beautiful watches, some
ornamented with pearls or diamonds, others elegantly enamelled, or chased
in the most delicate style. They were of various prices, from thirty
to one hundred guineas, and the old gentleman rubbing his hands with
an air of rapture, exclaimed, “There they are, Sir; a most fashionable
assortment of goods; allow me to recommend them; they’re all a-going,
Sir—all a-going.” I smiled inwardly at the latter part of this speech,
and thought to myself, “I wish they were going, with all my heart, along
with the diamond rings.” I answered, they were certainly very handsome,
but I would defer a minute inspection of them till my next visit, when I
should have more time to spare. These watches were ranged in exact order,
in five parallel lines, and between each watch was placed a gold seal
or other trinket appertaining to a lady’s watch. It was no easy matter,
therefore, to take away a single article without its being instantly
missed, unless the economy of the whole had been previously deranged. I
contrived, however, to displace a few of the trinkets, on pretence of
admiring them, and ventured to secrete one very rich gold seal marked six
guineas. I then declared I could stay no longer, as I had appointed to
meet a party at the theatre; but that I would certainly call again in a
few days, and lay out some money in return for the trouble I had given.
Mr. Bilger expressed his thanks in the most respectful terms, and waited
upon me to the door, where he took leave of me with a very low _congé_,
_à la mode de France_, of which country he was a native. I now put the
best foot foremost, and having gained a remote street, turned my head,
and perceived Bromley at my heels, who seized my hand, congratulating
me on my success, and complimenting me on the address I had shewn in
this exploit; for he had witnessed all that passed, and knew that I had
succeeded in my object, by the manner in which I quitted the shop. He
informed me that Mr. Bilger, had returned to his counter, and without
attending to the arrangement of the articles thereon, had joined his son
who was still waiting upon the lady, and that he, Bromley, had finally
left them both engaged with her.

Having thus happily achieved this adventure we returned to my lodgings,
where I displayed the booty I had made, and gratified Bromley with a
couple of guineas for his trouble, which fully satisfied him, as I did
not take him with me on terms of equal partnership. The next morning,
Saturday, on reviewing the articles, my wife was so much pleased with one
of the rings, (a beautiful ruby, surrounded with rose-diamonds, price
six guineas,) which exactly fitted her fore-finger, that I suffered
her to retain it for wearing on extraordinary occasions; and I myself
determined to keep the one marked sixteen guineas, (which was a double
rowed brilliant half hoop,) for my little finger. As to the nine-guinea
ring, (which was composed of brilliants, having a space for hair in
the centre,) I sold it immediately, together with the gold seal, to
a Jew-receiver, with whom I had frequent dealings. The broach I also
took a fancy to for my own wear, and the gold clasp I presented to my
wife. In the evening of this day I visited my friends in Newgate, (the
two brothers,) and acknowledged the service they had rendered me by a
suitable present, besides regaling the whole ward with a treat of ale and
porter.

In the interval between my discharge from confinement, and my visit
to Mr. Bilger, I one day went to the shop of a pawnbroker, in
Brydges-street, Covent-garden, for the purpose of pledging some seals,
rings, and other trinkets, which I had purloined at the several shops to
which the brothers had recommended me. I had frequently pledged similar
articles at this shop, as well as many others, because I could get
nearly fifty per cent more by that means than a common receiver would
give for the same goods, and I afterwards sold the duplicates among my
acquaintances, or to the Jews, by which I gained a still further advance.
I entered a private box, as is usual with persons who wish to observe
secrecy; and the pawnbroker, whose name was Turner, coming himself to
wait on me, I produced my goods, demanding a certain sum upon them. Mr.
Turner having looked over the articles, pulled out the sliding shutter
which extends across the counter, so as to obscure the customer from
the view even of a person in the adjoining box, and having taken this
precaution, he spoke to me, in a very respectful manner, to the following
effect: “Sir, I hope you will excuse what I am going to say; but having
observed that you frequently pledge similar goods to these at our shop,
which are afterwards taken out by other persons, I take for granted you
are in the habit of selling the duplicates; it is not my wish to be
impertinently curious, but my reason for asking, is, that if I am right
in my conjecture, I conceive you might as well give me the opportunity
of purchasing them as a stranger. I am ready to give you a fair price,
as I have opportunities of disposing of such goods in the way of trade,
and without putting them in the window, or exposing them at all. Or if
you prefer selling them at once, I will offer you the utmost farthing
I can give, at a word, and save both you and myself the trouble of a
duplicate.” All this he uttered in a low but earnest voice, and with
every appearance of sincerity. Perceiving me to hesitate, he added with
increased emphasis, “Depend on it, Sir, I’ll deal upon the square with
you; I don’t mean to take the smallest advantage, I assure you.” These
last words determined me. I thought it improbable that he could have
any motive for deceiving me, and knowing that many of the pawnbrokers
in London are men of the world, who, while they preserve outwardly a
fair reputation, are at the bottom arrant receivers of stolen goods, I
supposed this man to be one of them; I therefore answered that he was not
mistaken in his opinion; that I was myself in the habit of dealing in
such goods, and being sometimes pressed for money, I was then obliged to
pledge or sell a few articles, to relieve a temporary inconvenience; and
that, relying upon his promises of fair dealing, I had no objection, when
such was the case, to give him an opportunity of becoming a purchaser.
He thanked me for the favour, and desired I would set a price upon the
articles I had now brought. I did so, and he offered me at once a sum
equal to what I expected, though somewhat less than I asked him. Having
received the money agreed for, I departed, well pleased with having
formed so good a connexion. I only describe this interview as explanatory
of a circumstance I shall by and by have occasion to relate.

Any body would suppose that I might have been satisfied with my late
success at Bilger and Son’s, and it will hardly be credited that I should
have the temerity to pay them a second visit, agreeably to the promise
I gave Mr. Bilger at parting: but, such was nevertheless the fact. On
the Monday following the Friday on which I robbed them, having occasion
for a little ready money to pay an instalment to my tailor, with whom I
kept a running account, I requested my wife to take the diamond-ring I
had kept for my own wear, and pledge it at Turner’s for five guineas,
while I myself went with her ring to another shop, and borrowed three
guineas on it. I conceived there could be no danger attending this
proceeding, as there was nothing remarkable in either of the rings, and
I had the fullest conviction that the pawnbroker to whom I applied, was
actually such a character as from the conversation of Turner, I doubted
not the latter to be: besides, it was in my power at a minute’s warning
to have redeemed both, and I intended so to do in a few days. The next
day (Tuesday,) I determined to re-visit Mr. Bilger, against the advice
both of my wife and Bromley, who censured such a step as an act of
downright madness, which indeed it certainly was: but I was so infatuated
as to think it possible that as there was another party in the shop as
well as myself, the suspicion might have attached to her; or, that my
appearance and address would so far operate in my favour, as at least to
leave Bilger in doubt who to suspect: in which case, my calling again
exactly at the time I had promised, would certainly remove every shadow
of such doubt, and I might perhaps be enabled to obtain one or more of
the valuable watches Mr. Bilger had shewn me. To make every thing secure
I intended to take Bromley with me, who could observe the reception I
met with, and in the event of my being detained on suspicion, I directed
him to hasten to my wife with the information, who was instantly to
redeem the two rings we had pledged, and then effectually conceal the
whole of the stolen articles beyond the reach of discovery; so that no
property being found on, or traced to me, I must inevitably have been
discharged. These precautions were certainly sufficient to prevent any
ill consequences, but still I shall ever condemn myself for so rash an
act. About six o’clock in the evening, myself and Bromley set out on this
ill-fated expedition. Arriving at Bilger’s, I entered with an air of
confidence, and finding the son only in the shop, I addressed him with
a good-natured smile in these words: “Well, Sir, you see I’m punctual
to my promise: is your father within?” He answered in the affirmative,
with a mixture of surprise and doubt in his countenance; then stepping
backwards, he called Mr. Bilger, saying in a significant tone, “Father,
here is the gentleman come about the diamond ring.” Mr. Bilger then
advancing, saluted me with a formal coldness, which convinced me that
I was suspected. However, it was then too late to recede, so laying my
hat upon the counter, and drawing a stool, I said, with a familiar air,
“Well, Mr. Bilger, I have called to give you directions for making this
ring, but I must beg that you will spare no pains in the execution, as
I repeat that the price will not be an object; only tell me candidly
at what time you will undertake to have it ready, as I am going out of
town in a few days.” He replied, that I might depend on it by Saturday
evening. “Very well,” said I, “that will be time enough.” Mr. Bilger
then desired his son to take down my instructions, for which purpose
the latter opened his day-book, and I took from my pocket the card of
draughts, in which I pointed out the one I had determined on. Then
describing minutely the various particulars, the kind of shank, _&c._;
the young man wrote what he thought necessary, appearing to pay the
strictest attention to my directions, and concluded with requesting my
name and address. I answered (what first came into my head, as my only
object now was to get decently clear of the shop,) “Mr. Deakin, 13,
Curzon-street, May-fair.” I next desired Mr. Bilger to shew me again his
assortment of lady’s watches, as I intended to purchase one when the ring
was completed; but, the old gentleman replied with evident embarrassment,
that he really had none in the house, but that his son should wait upon
me with a selection, when the ring was finished! I answered carelessly,
“that will do very well, Mr Bilger. I hope, Sir, you will not fail to be
punctual; let it be an elegant article, and don’t neglect to send the
watches. I shall now bid you good evening.” Then buttoning my coat,
_&c._, I advanced toward the door, expecting every moment to be detained,
or at least questioned about the three diamond rings. Nothing of the
sort, however, occurred. Mr. Bilger attended me to the door with as much
politeness, though not quite the same warmth as at my first visit; and
I was not at all sorry when I found myself at a distance from the shop.
My watchful friend Bromley soon joined me, with the information that
Bilger had stood above a minute gazing after me before he closed the
door, and that he clearly perceived I had had a narrow escape. Having
satisfied myself by making the experiment, I now hastened home to relieve
the anxiety of my wife; and concluding I should neither see or hear any
more of Messrs. Bilger and Son, turned my attention to new projects for
“raising the wind.”

A few days afterwards, calling at Turner’s, the pawnbroker, to dispose of
some trifling articles, that person, after apologizing for the liberty
he was about to take, begged leave to ask if my “good lady” had not
pledged a diamond-ring with him a few days before, for five guineas?
Surprised at this question, I hesitated; on which he continued, “I assure
you, Sir, I have no impertinent motive for the question, but a lady of
my acquaintance having seen the article, is very much in love with it;
and, if it should be yours, and that you are inclined hereafter to sell
it, I should be happy to purchase it for her. The lady who pledged it
having frequently come to redeem articles left by you, I concluded from
thence that she was your wife.” As I was willing to be upon my guard,
I answered, that my wife had indeed several rings, and it was possible
he might be right in his conjecture, but I was ignorant of her having
pledged such an article; that I would, however, make inquiry on the
subject, and let him know the next time I saw him. Having communicated
this conversation to my wife, she saw nothing extraordinary in it, as
the ring was a very elegant trinket, and would naturally excite the
admiration of any lady. The next day, I again called upon Turner, and
told him that the ring he mentioned was the property of my wife, but at
present she had no mind to part with it, and here the matter dropped.

Three or four days after this last interview, having been successful at
the theatres, and my purse being replenished, I determined to redeem the
ring pledged at Turner’s, and taking the duplicate with me, I entered
one of the private boxes as usual, from a back door in Russell-court,
and calling to the shopman, produced my ticket, and desired to have the
ring. The lad took the former out of my hand, and laid it on a shelf;
then proceeded with the business he was before engaged in, without
offering to attend to me. I thought this very odd, and seeing Turner
himself at the far end of the counter, writing duplicates for some women,
and pretending to be so much engaged as not to notice me, though I was
sensible he must, I began, as the phrase is, to _smell a rat_. I then
repeated my request to the boy, with some impatience, and a louder voice,
on which the latter went up to his master, and I heard him whisper, “Sir,
here’s the gentleman come for the diamond-ring.” His master, without
turning his head, or looking off his book, (though he always used to pay
the most eager attention to me,) said something I could not hear; and
the lad approaching the box in which I stood, told me his master would
be glad if I would step round to the front door, (meaning the door of
the public shop, which opened into Brydges-street.) I was now more than
ever surprised, and convinced that mischief was intended me. However, as
in such cases, I was often too rash, and despised fear as unbecoming an
adventurer of my address and appearance, I answered, “O by all means,
my man, I’ll go round;” which I immediately did; but on entering the
shop, I was surprised to find that Mr. Turner had vanished. I then said
to the boy, with a smile of gaiety, “Why, my good lad, I don’t see your
master, now I’ve taken the trouble to come here.” The boy replied, “Sir,
my master will wait upon you directly; he’s only gone backwards to speak
to the servant.” This was enough for me. I no longer doubted that he was
gone to send for an officer; and that it was, therefore, high time for
me to make sail while I was well. I, therefore, appeared for a moment
satisfied with the boy’s answer, but seeming suddenly to recollect
myself, I said to him, “My wife is at the door; I believe I may as well
ask her to step in,” Then immediately opening the door, which fell to
with a pulley, I quitted the shop and turning the corner, got into
Russell-court, through which I ran with all my speed, nor stopped till I
found myself at a considerable distance, and out of all danger. I then
walked home by a circuitous route, and related the adventure to my wife,
who was, of course, seriously alarmed, and joined with me in reprobating
the treachery of the pawnbroker, for whose perfidious conduct, after the
assurances he had given me, we were at a loss to account.




CHAPTER VII.

    _Take a House in St. George’s Fields.—Stay at home for several
    Weeks.—At length I venture out in quest of Money.—My imprudent
    Obstinacy in entering a House of ill-repute against the Advice
    and Entreaties of my Wife.—I am taken in custody, and carried
    to the Watch-house.—Distress of my Wife on the Occasion._


As my person was well known to all the surrounding pawnbrokers, and my
real abode to many of them, myself and wife were under considerable
alarm at every knock we heard at the house-door that evening; and it
was my wife’s earnest entreaty that I should the next morning look out
for a lodging in a remote part of the town, where I might lie concealed
for awhile until the affair had cooled. Accordingly I went out with
that intention at an early hour, and engaged a first floor very neatly
furnished, in Webber-row, St. George’s Fields; to which we removed with
our effects, in the most private manner, the very next day. As I had
taken care that we were not watched in our removal, we found ourselves
freed from any immediate anxiety in our new abode; but I was afraid
to shew myself at all in the neighbourhood of our late residence, nor
could I venture even to the theatres in quest of money. We, therefore,
continued domesticated until after Christmas; but finding the rent we
paid (fourteen shillings per week,) to come rather heavy upon us, as I
was getting nothing, but living on the little I had by me, I determined
to hire a small house in one of the new streets near the Obelisk, and
to purchase such articles of furniture as were indispensable, whatever
sacrifices I might make to enable me to do so. I very soon met with a
neat little house, in Gun-street, at the low rent of five shillings a
week. It consisted indeed of only two rooms, one over the other, with a
small kitchen behind, but was sufficiently large for our purpose. I was
so assiduous in this undertaking, that in a few days I had purchased
every necessary article for our use, and we immediately entered on the
premises. It is true, having but little ready money, I was compelled
on this occasion to pledge my watch, chain, and seals, together with
several trinkets of my own and my wife’s, and many articles of our
wearing apparel, but of the latter we had both a pretty ample stock. We
were then obliged to live as frugally as possible, and during the whole
month of January I never once stirred out of the street we resided in,
except on the following occasion. Being anxious to see poor Bromley,
whom I had not had an opportunity of apprizing of our removal from
Drury-lane, I determined to venture out, and endeavour to find him at
one of the houses I knew he frequented in that neighbourhood: for this
purpose I disguised myself as much as I could, and going late in the
evening to a public-house in Parker’s lane, I found a number of dissolute
characters of the lowest class, assembled there, but on looking round
saw no appearance of Bromley. Having drank a glass at the bar, I was
on the point of quitting the house to seek further, when a girl of the
town, of whom there were a number present, tapped me on the shoulder,
and, taking me aside, observed that she was astonished at my madness
in venturing to that quarter of the town, considering the situation in
which I stood, and the consequent risk I incurred. This girl had formerly
cohabited with Bromley, and had by that means known me for some time. As
I knew her to be incapable of any bad design, I requested her to explain
herself more fully. She then said, that she had gone a few days before
this to the shop of Lane, a pawnbroker in Drury-lane, on some business
of her own, and that one of the shopmen inquired if she had lately seen
Vaux? desiring her, if she met with me, to caution me to keep out of the
way, as I was advertised, and very fully described in printed hand-bills,
circulated among the pawnbrokers, in which I stood charged with robbing
a jeweller’s shop in Piccadilly; that being on intimate terms with this
shopman, she had obtained a sight of the hand-bill in question, and had
read with her own eyes a confirmation of what the young man had told
her. She now repeated to me the tenor of the same, stating that a reward
of ten guineas was offered for my apprehension, and ten guineas more on
my conviction; that the articles stolen, consisting of diamond-rings,
_&c._, were described, as was also my dress, and person, in the minutest
manner, not excepting even my whiskers, eyes, and teeth, the watch and
appendages I wore, the mourning-ring on my finger, eye-glass, _&c._ She,
therefore, strongly exhorted me to avoid this part of the town, in which
I was so well known; and promised if she saw Bromley, to direct him to
a place I named, at which he would hear of me. Having gratified this
well-meaning woman with a small present, I returned home with all the
speed I could; and ruminating in my way on what I had heard, I was now
convinced beyond a doubt, that Bilger junior, at the time he pretended to
be taking directions of me for the ring I bespoke, was actually intent
upon taking a description of my person, _&c._, which he wrote down in the
book before him, in order that, should his father’s suspicions prove well
founded, a proper search might be made after me. This news was not likely
to alleviate the anxiety of my wife for my safety, or to encourage me in
sallying forth with the view of recruiting my finances, which were now at
a very low ebb.

At length, however, necessity compelled me to wave every consideration,
for every thing we could conveniently spare was in pawn, including even
my books, some of which were valuable. I, therefore, dressed myself in
my usual manner, and, on Tuesday evening, the 31st of January 1809, left
my home, with an intention of trying my luck at one of the Theatres;
but in my way thither, I was induced to enter a shop, (namely, Sharp’s,
the razor-maker, corner of Ludgate-hill,) of which I had conceived some
hopes; and fortune favoured me so far, that I obtained a booty of silver
fruit-knives, pencil-cases, pocket-books with instruments, _&c._, which
I estimated at four or five guineas. I was so pleased with this success
that I returned home, satisfied with my night’s gain, and gave up my
former design of going to the Theatre. My wife was agreeably surprised at
my premature return; and, as it was then but seven o’clock, I proposed to
her that we should take a walk as far as Blackfriars’-bridge, as she had
of late been closely confined to the house, and I conceived her health
required air and exercise. She immediately assented, and having locked
up the house, we proceeded towards the bridge; on arriving at which she
would have turned back, but I persuaded her to cross the water, and go as
far as the end of Fleet-street. We there entered a liquor-shop, and took
some refreshment; and my wife then earnestly pressed me to return, for
fear of meeting with some of the officers who might know me; but I now
entreated her to walk as far as Clare-market, as I wished to see a young
man who had promised to meet me, or to leave a note for me at a certain
public-house, which I had sometimes frequented when I lived in that
neighbourhood. I had, in fact, intended to call there in my way to or
from the theatre, in order to settle a plan for accompanying this person
and several others, to a grand fight, which was to have taken place the
next day at Moulsey-burst, between two celebrated pugilists, and at which
we expected to reap a plentiful harvest. The going to this house was the
maddest act I could possibly have committed, for the Bow-street officers
were in the habit of visiting it at all hours; and several of them had
seen me there at various times, dressed exactly in the manner described
in the hand-bills I have mentioned. My wife, who appears to have had too
sure a presentiment of what the consequence would be, used every art to
dissuade me from my purpose, but in vain. I assured her that I would
not stop five minutes; and that to prevent danger, she herself should
first enter the house, and observe whether there were any officers in
it, in which event I could but retire without going in, and immediately
return home. Finding I was obstinately determined on this rash step, she
accompanied me, and, on arriving near the house. I sent her into make
observations. The landlord (who had himself been an old thief), received
her very courteously; and inquiring for me, she privately asked him if
there was any danger of the officers coming there? To which he answered
in the negative, and assured her I might with safety make my appearance.
She accordingly gave me the signal, and I entered the public tap-room, in
which I found about twenty notorious characters, assembled at different
tables, some drinking and smoking, others employed in gambling with
cards, _&c._ The young man above-mentioned had left a short note, which
the landlord now put into my hand; in which I was requested to meet
him the next morning at a certain time and place, adding that he had
engaged a chaise, and that a seat was reserved for me. My wife now again
pressed me to return after taking a glass at the bar; but my evil genius
prevailed, and I stipulated that I should smoke one pipe of tobacco, and
would then willingly retire. I accordingly took a seat, placing my wife
between myself and my old acquaintance George W—k—n, who invited us to
join him. I was situated with my back to the door of the room, which
opened into a passage leading to the street. I occupied the very end of
the seat or bench, which had an elbow, on which I rested my right arm,
and there were at the same table three or four other persons besides our
party. I had scarcely lighted my pipe when I observed two men, (strangers
to me), enter the room, and whisper with the landlord; and I thought I
perceived the landlord while answering them, to glance his eye upon me;
but I only mention this by-the-by, as I had the fullest conviction of the
landlord’s integrity, and the strangers had not the least appearance of
officers; consequently, the circumstance did not at all alarm me. I had
been about half an hour in the house, and was on the point of taking my
leave, when I heard the room-door pushed open, and, as is natural in such
cases, I involuntarily turned my head; when, to my utter confusion and
alarm, I perceived two officers enter the room. As I thought it possible
I might escape their notice, I pulled my hat over my eyes, and turning
my head towards my wife and friend, on my left-hand, pretended to be in
earnest conversation with them; but how can I express my feelings, when
the officers walked immediately up to me, as naturally as if they had
been sitting in my company the whole evening; and one of them looking me
full in the face, said, “Mr. Vaux, we want you!” With as much composure
as I could assume, I answered that he was mistaken in addressing me, for
that was not my name. The fellow replied that he was certainly right,
but begged that I would step out with him into the passage, and he would
explain himself more fully. I was so weak (or rather so confounded
with surprise) as to comply with this request; and I was no sooner in
the passage, and the tap-room door closed, than the two ruffians laid
hold of me, one on each side, and hurried me away with the greatest
impetuosity. Having got a few yards from the house, they stopped to view
me by the light of a lamp, and one of them having attentively surveyed my
features (probably to compare them with the advertisement) said to his
fellow, “I’m sure we are right, Jack; he answers the description; come
along.” As they were conducting me to St. Martin’s Watch-house, they put
several questions to me, respecting my knowledge of a jeweller’s shop
in Piccadilly, my being tried at the Old Bailey, in November sessions,
_&c._; all which were of course unavailing, as I denied any knowledge
of their meaning, but which too well convinced me that they had a
thorough knowledge of my person and character, acquired no doubt from the
treacherous information of some of my dissolute acquaintances. One of
them observed, that if they had not met with me this night, they should
have done so the next day at the fight, so that it had only prevented
them from seeing the battle: perhaps, they only surmised that I should
have gone there, it being the custom for most of the London thieves
to attend such spectacles; but I have sometimes thought my intention
of going was communicated to them, either by the person I was to have
accompanied, or by the landlord who delivered me his open note on the
subject. The other observed, that I had made a good thing of it at the
Haymarket the preceding summer; adding, “We wondered who the devil it
was, that was so busy there; we did not know you so well then as we do
now, or we should have spoiled your sport.”—The fact was, that these two
vagabonds were on constant duty every night, inside of that theatre; and
I, consequently, knew them well, long before this fatal rencontre; but
I always took care to shun them, and had never excited their suspicion,
as I was not once during the whole season, detected in the course of my
operations at that house.

We now arrived at the watch-house, where they proceeded to search me
closely, but found nothing that had any relation to the present charge;
and I must not omit that their first attention was directed to my little
finger, no doubt in search of the mourning ring, mentioned in the
hand-bills; but the said ring was at this time deposited as a pledge for
the loan of one pound at a certain pawnbroker’s, and I had on, in lieu
thereof, a plain gold ring of trifling value; this they examined, and
finding (to use their words) that there were “no letters on it,” they
suffered me to retain it. I happened unluckily to have on, this night,
the very same dress I wore when I visited Mr. Bilger, namely, a black
coat and waistcoat, blue pantaloons, Hessian boots, and the same hat,
which was remarkable, being in the extreme of the newest fashion. The
only variation was, that I had neither the gold watch, eye-glass, or
mourning ring, about me, nor had I any powder in my hair; and I had on
over my other clothes a brown great-coat. After searching me, they gave
me in charge to the watch-house-keeper, and desiring to know what name
I chose to give in, as I denied being called Vaux, I assured them my
name was James Lowe, this being the name of my much-loved grandfather,
and the first that occurred to me. In this name I was therefore entered
in the charge-book, and, having told the keeper that they should call
for me in the morning, they departed. When left to ruminate on my now
hopeless condition, nothing affected me so much as the distress my poor
wife must suffer, on my being thus torn from her, and what heightened
my affliction, was, the consciousness, that had I listened to her
affectionate advice, I should probably have avoided this misfortune, and
been at that moment happy in her society, by my own fire-side: but mature
reflection convinced me, that, my time being come, it was impossible to
escape the fate to which I was born, and destined from the moment of
that birth.—I, therefore, bowed with resignation to a fate, which by my
vicious conduct I had certainly merited; and applied for consolation to
a pipe and a jug of ale, which I was permitted to send for, and which
indulgence I compensated by liberally treating the keeper and his wife,
according to the established usage of such places.

I afterwards learnt that my wife had fainted immediately on my
apprehension, and continued for some minutes in violent hysterics, on
recovering from which our friend W—k—n had kindly conducted her home,
and consoled her at parting with the assurance that he would not sleep
till he had found out to what place I was conveyed, and done all in his
power to render my condition as tolerable as circumstances would admit.
But his inquiries were ineffectual, and it was not till the following
day, that he could obtain an interview with me.




CHAPTER VIII.

    _Discover that I have been betrayed.—Examined at Bow-street,
    and committed for Trial.—Sent to Newgate.—Prepare for my
    Defence.—My Trial and Conviction._


About an hour after the officers had left me, they returned to the
watch-house, bringing in prisoner, a well-dressed gentleman in a state of
ebriety, accompanied by several of his friends, who it seemed, had been
taken in custody for riotous conduct at the Haymarket theatre. As soon as
they had given charge of this person, and again withdrawn, the gentleman,
whose friends had also taken their leave, seated himself near the fire,
and entered into conversation with me on the subject of his apprehension.
He informed me, that having in the beginning of the evening had a quarrel
with another gentleman in the boxes, and their altercation disturbing
the audience, he had been taken into custody by these officers as the
aggressor; but that having apologized for his conduct, and made his peace
with his opponent, he had been liberated, and the officers had suddenly
quitted him; that about ten o’clock, however, to his great surprise, the
two rascally constables (as he termed them,) had again apprehended him,
under colour of the original charge, and conveyed him to the watch-house;
and that in their way, they stated that they should have done so on his
first apprehension, but that they were suddenly sent for to the other
end of the town, for the express purpose of taking a notorious thief,
of whom they had received information! The gentleman here continued,
(little supposing he was speaking to the identical person,) “some
d⸺d house-breaker, or highwayman, I suppose. I don’t know who the
rascal was.” The reader may be sure I took no pains to inform him; but
commiserating his case, and condemning the base conduct of the officers,
we conversed together on indifferent subjects for about an hour, and
were then shewn to separate beds in the same room, where we were locked
up till morning. It now appeared evident that I had been betrayed; but
by whom, I am to this day ignorant; sometimes suspecting the landlord;
at others the young man I have before mentioned; and sometimes, one of
the company who sat at table with me; as I was afterwards informed that
the whole room being much alarmed at my sudden apprehension, and the
manner in which it took place, some one remarked that I must certainly
have been villanously betrayed. Upon which this man (whose name was Bill
White, otherwise, Conky-beau,) immediately changed colour, and said, “I
hope nobody suspects me, I certainly did leave the room, but it was only
for a few minutes, in order to get a little tobacco at the next shop.”
At all events, there must have been much expedition used, for I was not
above half an hour in the house, and the distance from thence to the
Haymarket theatre is at least a mile. Indeed the officers confessed to me
afterwards, that I had been _sold_, (as the phrase is,) but declared that
no bribe should induce them to disclose the party.

The ensuing morning, about ten, the officers conducted me to Bow-street,
where Mr. Justice Graham presided. On being put to the bar, I observed
Mr. Bilger, senior, and the perfidious pawnbroker, in waiting; the
former viewed me with attention, and seemed immediately convinced of my
identity, of which he informed the magistrate. Having then stated the
particulars of his charge, against me, (which I need not here repeat,)
the pawnbroker produced the fatal ring, stating that he received it
from a woman, whom I afterwards acknowledged to be my wife; he also
produced a pearl and amethyst broach, set in gold, which he deposed to
purchasing from me among some other articles of the like nature. Mr.
Bilger swore that he believed the former to be his property, and the
working jeweller, who had supplied the three rings for my inspection,
swore positively to its being one of them; as to the broach, Mr. Bilger
would not positively swear, but fully believed it to be the one he
lost. In this, however, he was mistaken; for I have already stated
that I kept that broach for my own wear, and it was at this moment in
pledge for one pound in the Borough; but I had, a few days previous to
my robbing Mr. Bilger, purloined, among other trinkets, from a shop
in the city, a broach so exactly similar, that on comparing the two
together, I was in doubt which to retain; but the pearls, in Bilger’s,
being rather larger, I preferred the latter, and disposed of the other
to Turner, as he had truly said. When asked if I had any defence to
offer, I merely answered that I was not the person, having never seen
Mr. Bilger or his shop in my life. Mr. Graham observed, the case was
so clear that he should immediately commit me; but having understood
that many jewellers, _&c._, who had been robbed, were in attendance to
identify me, he inquired for them; the officers, however, stated that
none were present, except a shopman of Mr. Chandler in Leicester-fields,
who had been a considerable sufferer; but on this young man viewing me,
he declared I was not the person who had been at his master’s shop;
in which, by-the-by, he was egregiously mistaken. The magistrate then
committed me for trial, on Mr. Bilger’s charge; and ordered that I should
be brought up again on that day se’ennight, (the 8th of February,) in
order that the different shopkeepers might have notice to attend. I was
now conveyed to Tothill-fields Bridewell, where I continued a week. My
first object was to establish a communication with my wife; but I was
afraid of suffering her to visit me, lest she might have been detained
as an accomplice. She, however, sent her sister to me daily, who brought
me every needful requisite for my use and comfort in the prison; and
among the rest, a change of apparel of a very different kind from that
in which I was apprehended. Having put on these clothes, I sent the
others back by the bearer; and the same day, a barber attending, whom I
had sent for to shave me, I requested him to cut off my whiskers, and
to crop my hair close. He did so, and I now cut so different a figure,
that no person could possibly identify me, unless intimately acquainted
with my features. Had I been enabled to take these measures before I
appeared at Bow-street, it is probable Mr. Bilger would not have ventured
to swear to me; but unfortunately they were adopted too late to render
me any essential service. When the officers came to the prison, and saw
the metamorphose I had undergone, they were, however, highly enraged;
charged the turnkeys with gross neglect of duty, and want of vigilance
in suffering the means to be admitted, and threatened to represent the
circumstances to the magistrate. I laughed heartily at their chagrin,
and said all I could to heighten their vexation. On the day appointed,
I was brought up for re-examination; but it seemed the tradesmen who
were expected, had not thought it worth their while to attend, for none
made their appearance. Mr. Graham viewed me with evident surprise,
demanding why I was so differently dressed, and what I had done with my
whiskers[48]. I answered, that I wore whatever I found most convenient
to myself, and as to whiskers, I never had any. His Worship stared at
this assertion, and declared, that when he first examined me, I had very
large whiskers, and my hair dressed in the fashionable mode. “However,”
added he, “I see through your design; but it has been executed too late,
and this stratagem will not now serve your turn.” I was then finally
committed to Newgate, as the Session was to commence on that day week
(the 15th). My unhappy wife was waiting the issue of my examination, in
the neighbourhood of the public office, and on learning the result, took
coach, and was at the door of Newgate as soon as myself. The officers
who escorted me having retired, both my wife and I were very kindly
received by the principal turnkey, who instantly recognised us as Mr. and
Mrs. Hardy, and expressed his concern at my so soon becoming again an
inmate of Newgate. He then ordered me to have a light iron put on; and
requesting to know what ward I wished to go into, I chose the same I had
before been a member of, and to this room my wife accompanied me. After
receiving the compliments of such of the prisoners as were before my
fellow-lodgers, (among whom were the two brothers,) all of whom vied with
each other in contributing to our accommodation, we partook of some tea;
and having been a fortnight separated from my beloved wife, I would not
suffer her to quit me until the next morning.

I had now but a few days to prepare for my approaching trial; and though
I entertained no hopes of escaping conviction, I determined to employ a
counsel; and who so proper (thought I,) as my good friend Mr. Knapp, who
had so adroitly brought me off on a late occasion. I, therefore, drew a
brief, in which I dwelt strongly on some particular points both of law
and fact, and enclosed it, with the customary fee, in a letter to that
gentleman, reminding him of my being his client in November session, and
trusting he would do all in his power to extricate me from my present
embarrassment. Mr. Knapp assured my wife that I might depend on his best
exertions, and I now waited with patience for the event. My affectionate
partner was unremitting in her attention to me, being never absent but
when she had occasion to look into our affairs at home and her sister
having undertaken the care of our house till my fate was determined,
she slept with me every night, as I had reason to fear I should soon
be removed to a place where I could not have this indulgence. It was
something singular that my poor friend Bromley, whom I had not seen for
two months before, was brought into Newgate the very day after myself,
being committed on a capital charge of house-breaking. Being, however,
unable to pay the fees required on the master’s side, where I was
situated, he was obliged to put up with the common side, as it is termed;
but the two yards being contiguous, I had an opportunity of seeing him
every day.

On Wednesday the 15th of February, 1809, I was taken down to the
sessions-house for trial; and four persons having been successively
tried for capital offences, all of whom were convicted, I was next put
to the bar, and stood indicted “for feloniously stealing, on the 9th of
December, _&c._, a double-rowed brilliant half-hoop ring, value 16_l._
16_s._; a diamond ring for hair, value 9_l._ 9_s._; a rose diamond and
ruby ring, with serpent-chased shank, value 6_l._ 6_s._; and a pearl
and amethyst broach, value 2_l._ 2_s._, the goods of Matthias Bilger
the elder, and Matthias Bilger the younger, privately in their shop.”
The reader will observe that I was here indicted upon a certain act of
parliament, which makes it a capital offence to steal “goods, wares, or
merchandise, to the value of five shillings, privately in a shop.” My
indictment having been read over, I looked round for Mr. Knapp, whom I
expected to have found prepared with his brief; but not observing him
among the other counsellors, I inquired of the turnkeys near me, who
informed me that he was not in court. I then requested of the judge that
my trial might be deferred, on account of the absence of my counsel. The
court inquiring who was my counsel, I answered, Mr. Knapp; upon which Mr.
Gurney, another counsellor, rising from his seat, said, “My lord, I am
authorized to plead for Mr. Knapp.” This satisfied me, not doubting but
Mr. Gurney had my brief, and would do all in his power; and I suffered
the trial to proceed. The indictment having been read as I have before
described, to my no small surprise, Mr. Raine, the counsellor who had
been retained by my prosecutors, rose, and proceeded to state the case to
the jury; in doing which, according to custom, he gave so clear a view of
the facts attending my offence, and so artfully and eloquently coloured
the whole, that I saw the jury had more than half convicted me already,
and would only listen to the subsequent evidence as a requisite matter
of form. The counsel concluded his statement with this observation; “If,
gentlemen, these facts are clearly proved to you in evidence, (as I
persuade myself they will be,) no doubt can remain in your minds as to
the verdict you will give.” He then proceeded to examine the witnesses.
Mr. Bilger, senior, deposed what the reader is already in possession of,
with these additions; that, a few minutes after my quitting the shop,
he missed the articles named in the indictment; and that having, on my
second visit, received my final instructions for a ring, and the address
I have before mentioned, he went himself next day to Curzon-street, and
found No. 13 to be an empty house! Mr. Bilger having concluded, and Mr.
Gurney not offering to cross-examine him, conformable to the suggestions
in my brief, and as I fully expected he would, I was extremely surprised,
and was soon afterwards convinced that he had not received any brief
at all, or had any grounds to plead upon. I, therefore, requested to
ask Mr. Bilger a question, namely, “Why he did not apprehend me on the
Tuesday night, on which he swears I came the second time to his shop,
after having missed the property on the preceding Friday, and suspected
me for it?” _Ans._ “My lord, he had so much the appearance of a gentleman
that I thought I might be mistaken. He was very differently dressed
then from what he is now. He wore whiskers, and an eye-glass, and was
very nicely powdered[49]. My son went to the door in order to get a
constable, but he observed an accomplice.” (What Mr. Bilger meant by
this last assertion, or what he would deduce from it, I have no idea.)
The next evidence was that of Turner the pawnbroker; and I had in my
brief given such hints, that I hoped Mr. Knapp would have effectually
put this fellow out of countenance, by making him confess that he had,
at his own request, repeatedly bought such things of me. But here Mr.
Gurney was still silent, and I saw that it would be useless for me to ask
Turner any questions. The working-jeweller was then called to depose to
the ring, which he did in the strongest terms. Mr. Gurney barely asked
him, if he could undertake to swear that he had not made rings exactly
similar for other shops? He replied, that he was positive it was one of
the three which he sent to Mr. Bilger on the 9th of December. Next came
the scoundrel who took me, George Donaldson, a constable of St. Martin’s
parish; who stated that himself and Smith, one of the Bow-street patrole,
from information they had received, apprehended me at the Butchers’ Arms
in Clare-market, in company with a great many notorious thieves. The
evidence for the prosecution being now closed, Mr. Gurney inquired of Mr.
Bilger, senior, how many partners he had; who answered none but his son.
Then, what other persons were in the shop, (meaning assistants,) besides
his son and himself, when he lost his property? _Ans._ “Only a porter,
who was cleaning some plate at the further end of the counter, at some
distance from where the prisoner stood.” All that Mr. Gurney, therefore,
said or asked, any other person might have said without reference to
a brief; and having put these simple questions, or at least put them
in a simple and careless manner, Mr. Gurney sat himself down. The last
question, indeed, was of a most important nature, and if properly
handled, and enforced with becoming spirit, would, I have little doubt,
have rendered me the most essential service. To explain my meaning, I
must briefly expound a point of law, with which nine readers out of ten
may be unacquainted. The Act, under which I was indicted, provides, or is
interpreted to mean, that where there are two or more persons employed
as shopmen, _&c._, it is not sufficient for one alone to attend upon
the prisoner’s trial; but that every one, if there was a dozen, must
personally appear, to swear that he or she did not see or suspect the
prisoner to commit the act of robbery; because the law (always favourable
to the culprit,) presumes, that if one person out of the whole number
is absent, that very person might possibly have suspected the prisoner;
and then such suspicion, however slight, if confessed, proves that the
robbery was not effected so privately as to come within the meaning of
the Act; consequently, there is an end of the capital part of the charge,
and the prisoner can only be transported for seven years. The reader will
see, in the next Chapter, my reason for being thus particular in this
explanation. The judge now summed up the evidence, and what was most
extraordinary, I was not even called on for my defence; so much were the
court prejudiced against me, from the eloquent opening of the learned
counsel, the clear and decisive evidence of the witnesses; and, perhaps,
(above all,) from some little private intimation they had received of my
real character and past life. However, as I felt that no defence I could
make, was likely to prevent my conviction, I was not much concerned on
the occasion; and the jury after two minutes’ consideration returned the
fatal verdict of “Guilty.” This verdict was no sooner pronounced, than
the villain Donaldson, standing up in the witness-box, said, “My lord,
I think it my duty to inform the court what I know of the prisoner at
the bar. I have been given to understand that he is a very old offender,
and that he has been but a few months returned from Botany-Bay!” At this
malicious address, there was a general murmur of indignation throughout
the whole court; and Mr. Gurney (to do him justice,) rose with much
warmth, saying, “Mr. Donaldson, you ought to be ashamed of yourself
for having made such a disclosure; you acknowledge you only have this
circumstance from hearsay, and had you known it to be true, after the
prisoner being capitally convicted, it is most shameful and unmanly
conduct of you to mention it.” The malicious rascal was justly confounded
at this rebuff, and sneaked away amidst the execrations of the auditors.

After my conviction I was double-ironed, and detained in the dock until
the evening, my trial having occupied about two hours; and at eight
o’clock, I was escorted to the press-yard, and locked up in one of
the condemned cells. My poor wife remained in the ward of the prison,
to which I belonged, until she saw me pass by, and I had only time to
console her in a few words through the bars of the window, and take leave
of her till the morning.




CHAPTER IX.

    _Account of my Companion and Fellow-sufferer in the condemned
    Cells.—His unhappy Fate.—I receive Sentence of Death.—Am
    reprieved, and soon afterwards sent on board the Hulks.—Some
    Account of those Receptacles of human Misery._


Besides the four men convicted the same day as myself, there were in the
cells several others who had been cast for death the preceding session;
and, the recorder’s report not having yet been made, they still remained
under sentence, ignorant of the fate which awaited them, but they were
in expectation of its being decided every succeeding levee-day. It
is customary to confine two condemned prisoners in each cell, and I
was destined to be the companion of a man named Nicholls, his former
bed-fellow having suffered about a week previous to my conviction. On
the turnkeys, who attended me, opening the door of his cell, the unhappy
man (Nicholls,) was discovered on his knees, with a book in his hand,
and evidently a prey to doubt and terror. My conductors apologized for
disturbing him, saying, they had only brought him a companion, and
hoped he would find consolation in my society. Poor Nicholls answered
in broken accents, “My God! I was a little alarmed,—I heard the keys
coming,—I thought it was the report.—What?—do you expect it to-night?”
The turnkeys replied, that from the lateness of the hour, it was not
probable; but begged him to compose himself, and hope for the best. They
then re-locked the doors, and left us. This unfortunate person had been
convicted of selling forged bank-notes, through the treachery of a man,
who, to save himself, had given information, and betrayed him by a signal
to the police-officers, at the moment of the negotiation taking place. As
he was known to have carried on this illegal and dangerous traffic to a
great extent in the town of Birmingham, where he resided, the Bank were
determined to make an example of him; particularly as he had obstinately
refused to save his own life by disclosing, as he could have done, most
important information on the subject, so as to lead to the detection
of the fabricators. This being the case of Nicholls, he had no hope of
mercy being extended to him; and was consequently in hourly dread of the
awful fiat which was to seal his doom, and consign him to a shameful and
premature death. On being left alone with him, I forgot for a moment my
own situation, and feeling for that of my ill-fated companion, whose
case I already knew, I exerted myself to console and sooth him; not
by raising in him hopes for which I knew there was no foundation, but
by exhorting him to look forward to “another and a better world;” to
comfort himself with the reflection that his crime, (though punished with
death on account of its injurious tendency in a commercial country,) was
not in a moral sense, or in the eye of God, of so black a nature as to
preclude him from the hope of mercy at that awful tribunal “before which
the judges of this world must themselves be tried.” By these and the
like suggestions, I so far succeeded as to compose him pretty much; and
having undressed ourselves, we went to bed. He then requested me to read
a few chapters to him, and earnestly asked my opinion on some particular
passages in the New Testament, which applied to his situation, and of the
real meaning of which he anxiously wished to be resolved. We had read
and reasoned on these topics until St. Paul’s clock struck ten, and were
on the point of composing ourselves to sleep, that “balm of hurt minds,”
when we were alarmed by the rattling of keys, and the sound of voices.
I endeavoured to calm the agitation of Mr. Nicholls, by supposing that
another unhappy man had been convicted, and was about to be introduced
to the cells; but he declared it must be the report, and fell on his
knees before the cell-door. The footsteps approaching, our door was
slowly unlocked, and the distressing agony of my companion was now
indescribable. Mr. Newman, the jailor, entered as quietly as possible,
and taking Nicholls by the hand, while he himself was evidently
affected, he said, “Mr. Nicholls,—the report has been made, and—(here
he would fain have paused,) I am sorry to inform you it has been
unfavourable.” _Nicholls._ “Lord, have mercy on me! God’s will be done!
I expected it, Mr. Newman,—it is no more than I expected.—When is it,—to
suffer, Mr. Newman?” The latter replied, “on Wednesday next.” _Nicholls._
“I could have wished, Mr. Newman, for a little longer time,—I’m not
prepared to die,—I have some worldly affairs to settle,—but,—God help
me!—I hope for more mercy from Him than the gentlemen of the bank have
shewn me.” Mr. Newman then assuring him of every attention in his power,
commended him to my care, and took a tender leave of us both, promising
to see Nicholls again in the morning. The reader will easily perceive
I had not the prospect of a very agreeable night before me; my own
situation was deplorable enough, but the distress of my unfortunate
bed-fellow overpowered every other consideration but that of pity and
grief for him. I had now my task to go through again, and to enforce
all I repeated with greater energy and stronger assurances. At length,
exhausted by contending passions, poor Nicholls fell asleep, and I had
then recourse to my philosophy for self-consolation.

The next day, Mr. Newman requested, as a favour, that I would continue to
bear the unfortunate Nicholls company during the week he had to live,
and in this request the latter also joined; so that I could not without
inhumanity refuse to comply, and in this melancholy interval I omitted
no opportunity of contributing to his comfort. The night before his
execution, I also, by his own desire, sat up with him: a very worthy and
devout man, of his acquaintance, accompanied by two other friends, also
attended him; and the greater part of the night was passed in reading,
exhortation, and singing hymns. Poor Nicholls was, however, in a very low
and desponding state, and evidently dreaded the approach of death. About
three o’clock he was advised to lie down, and sunk into a slumber from
which he did not wake till summoned by the keeper about six to descend to
the press-yard, the sheriffs, _&c._, being shortly expected. I now took a
solemn farewell of him, and was removed to another cell. At eight o’clock
the doleful sound of the tolling bell announced the awful ceremony, and
he was a few minutes afterwards launched into eternity; a woman named
Margaret Barrington, for forging and uttering a seaman’s will, suffering
with him. The fate of this unhappy man, who was of a most inoffensive
and gentle disposition, and left a numerous family to bewail his loss,
affected me much.

I had now a new companion assigned me, a young man about my own age,
who was convicted the day after myself, under what is called “Lord
Ellenborough’s Act.” His crime was shooting at a person who had
attempted to apprehend him in the act of robbery; but his pistol flashed
in the pan, and no injury whatever had taken place. However, the nature
of the offence excluded him also from any hopes of mercy, so that I had
the fortune to be placed in a second unpleasant situation, and probably
for a number of weeks. As to myself, I had no reason to doubt of being
reprieved, very few persons suffering death at that time of day, except
for most heinous crimes, or robbery attended with acts of violence.
This young man, ’tis true, was a much more tolerable companion than
his predecessor; he was always chearful and easy; declaring (although
he expected to suffer,) that, as he had never seriously injured man,
woman, or child, he was not afraid to die; but rather happy at the
prospect of being released from a troublesome world. He had formerly been
transported, but made his escape from the hulks; and the miseries he had
witnessed and endured onboard those horrid receptacles, he asserted to be
such that he preferred death to a reprieve, which might subject him to
years of similar suffering.

About eight days after my conviction, I was surprised at being summoned
to the main-gate of the prison, to attend a gentleman who inquired for
me. This person proved to be an attorney named Humphries, who, addressing
me, stated that he called by desire of counsellor Knapp, to inform me
that he (Mr. Knapp,) was sorry he had not been present at my trial, and
that he had discovered a point of law, of which he hoped to avail himself
so far as to obtain a revocation of my sentence; that he intended to
submit this point to the judge who tried me, and had instructed him (Mr.
Humphries,) to prepare a petition for the purpose, as it was Mr. Knapp’s
opinion that I ought not to have been capitally convicted; but that
nothing could be done till after the close of the session, and I must
receive the sentence of death as a matter of form; adding, that I might
make myself perfectly easy, as there was no danger of my suffering. I
now inquired of Mr. Humphries, of what nature was the point or objection
in question; but this limb of the law, assuming an air of importance,
answered that it would be useless to explain it to me, as, if he did, I
should not comprehend it! I was, however, convinced it related to the
absence of the porter who was present in Bilger’s shop, and who ought
to have attended my trial, for the reasons assigned in the preceding
Chapter. I, therefore, smiled at the mean opinion he entertained of my
understanding, but replied, that it was very well; I should depend on
Mr. Knapp and on his (Mr. Humphries’,) good offices: and here ended
our interview. For brevity’s sake, I shall inform the reader at once,
that I never derived any benefit from the intimation conveyed to me by
Humphries, although I several times wrote both to him and Mr. Knapp. But
I rather think it was a trick of the former, (who is a designing artful
pettifogger,) with a view of extorting money from me, on pretence of
drawing up petitions or other documents in my behalf. I had, however,
seen too much of the world to be the dupe of an Old Bailey solicitor. Two
or three days after this event, the session being concluded, the whole of
the prisoners convicted during their progress, were as usual taken down
to the court to receive sentence. Myself and the other five men, together
with two women, were first put to the bar. When asked, in my turn, what I
had to say, “why judgment of death should not pass upon me?” I answered,
that my counsel Mr. Knapp having intimated that he had discovered a legal
objection to my conviction, I humbly hoped his Lordship would be pleased
to respite the judgment. The recorder replied, “Prisoner, your request
cannot be complied with; if your counsel had any thing to offer in arrest
of judgment, he should have done so previous to the close of the session.
I must, therefore, pass sentence upon you.” In this observation, I knew
the recorder to be perfectly right; and though I was induced to make
the trial, I had no hopes of gaining any thing by my motion; and I was
now more fully convinced that either Mr. Knapp, or Mr. Humphries, or
both, had deceived me, and that I had been altogether very shamefully
neglected. His Lordship then proceeded to pass the awful sentence in
the usual form, which he prefaced with a very pathetic and impressive
address, that drew tears from the surrounding auditors. The other
prisoners were then put to the bar in rotation, and variously sentenced;
and among those transported for seven years, was poor Bromley, who,
though capitally indicted, had the good fortune to be convicted of simple
felony only. Thus we were both a second time convicted the same session,
as if his fate was involved in mine. He was, a few weeks afterwards, sent
on board the same hulk at Portsmouth, in which he had before served seven
years; and as he never came to this colony, he will, (if he survives,)
in a few months be discharged, and once more return to the scene of our
former exploits. I sincerely hope that his past sufferings will, however,
warn him to avoid a continuance of his guilty courses, and to amend his
life.

The recorder’s report to the King being, on some accounts, delayed,
I continued eleven weeks in the cells, in which time the number of
condemned persons had increased to eighteen! At length, the report was
made. About eight o’clock on Friday night, the 3d of May, Mr. Newman
entered the press-yard; and, as myself and companion listened with
palpitating hearts on their approach, we heard one of the turnkeys utter
the words “Cook and Lowe.” I confess that at the moment, I was under
considerable alarm; which the reader will allow to be natural, when he
considers that my fate was still doubtful, and that my life or death
depended on a single word from the keeper, who came to announce it.
Hearing our two names particularly mentioned, as he advanced towards our
cell, was also a circumstance calculated to increase our mutual terror.
At length the door was unlocked; and by this I knew that one of us, at
least, was doomed to suffer, because they always visit first those who
are ordered for execution. Mr. Newman entering with a grave countenance,
addressed poor Cook in nearly the same terms he had done Nicholls on a
former occasion; then turning to me, he said, “Lowe is respited.” My
unhappy companion received the melancholy news, as he had always declared
he should, with a cheerful aspect, nor appeared in the least dismayed.
The jailer having withdrawn, Cook, after an inward struggle, assured
me he felt perfectly reconciled; and after I had read to and consoled
him for a short time, retired to bed, and slept apparently with more
composure than usual. The next morning myself and the four others who
had been reprieved, (poor Cook being the only one to suffer,) were, as
usual, ordered to return to our respective wards; but Cook begged so
earnestly that I would not quit him till the fatal day, that I could
not avoid complying. In this period, his courage and resignation never
once failed him. The same worthy man who had attended Nicholls, passed
the last night with him, and I felt a melancholy pleasure in bearing
them company. Cook, however, was so cheerful and well-prepared, that he
slept profoundly the greatest part of the night, and, on being awaked
at the usual hour, appeared equally serene and happy. I obtained leave
to descend with him to the press-yard, where he washed himself, brushed
his coat, and seemed pleased at his approaching release (as he termed
it). I then, at his earnest request, accompanied him to the chapel,
where he received the sacrament, of which I partook. Some breakfast
having been prepared for him, he ate and drank with every appearance of
a good appetite; after which, his irons being knocked off, and the hour
approaching, I took an affectionate farewell of the poor fellow, who
declared to me at parting, that he should go out with as much pleasure
as if he was going to a fair or a race, and that he had rather die
than live. I then left him, and repaired to my own ward, through the
windows of which I saw him pass by to execution; and he really appeared
to verify the promise he had made me; nodding, as he passed, to his
fellow-prisoners, and having as fine a colour in his cheeks as ever I
saw a man. I was informed that he preserved this disposition to the
last moment, and died regretted by all who witnessed his deportment.
As I now knew the consequence of my being respited, namely, that I was
to be transported for life, I became anxious to leave England by the
first ship for this colony, as I was not in circumstances to subsist
for any length of time in a prison; and I wished, if possible, to avoid
going to the hulks, as I had been fortunate enough to do on my first
transportation. My wife, also, who had paid me the most dutiful attention
since my confinement, was earnestly desirous to accompany me in my exile;
and, with that view, she waited on a gentleman to whom I referred her,
soliciting his interest to obtain that favour; but, although he used
every effort, the application was refused, she having no family, and the
secretary of state having set his face against such an indulgence, on
account of the bad reports received of those women who had already been
suffered to go out free with their husbands. I was equally unsuccessful
in my application to be sent out by the ship Anne, which was on the
point of sailing. At length my wife received a private intimation that
I should be removed to the hulks the next morning; in consequence of
which, my mother and sisters, whom I immediately summoned, came to take
leave of me. I had only acquainted them with my misfortune since my being
respited, and they were of course equally astonished and grieved at the
news. My wife remained with me that night, and at four o’clock in the
morning, myself and eleven others were conveyed by water on board the
Retribution hulk at Woolwich.

I had now a new scene of misery to contemplate; and, of all the
shocking scenes I had ever beheld, this was the most distressing. There
were confined in this floating dungeon nearly six hundred men, most of
them double-ironed; and the reader may conceive the horrible effects
arising from the continual rattling of chains, the filth and vermin
naturally produced by such a crowd of miserable inhabitants, the oaths
and execrations constantly heard among them; and above all, from the
shocking necessity of associating and communicating more or less with so
depraved a set of beings. On arriving on board, we were all immediately
stripped, and washed in large tubs of water, then, after putting on each
a suit of coarse slop-clothing, we were ironed, and sent below, our own
clothes being taken from us, and detained till we could sell or otherwise
dispose of them, as no person is exempted from the obligation to wear
the ship-dress. On descending the hatch-way, no conception can be formed
of the scene which presented itself. I shall not attempt to describe it;
but nothing short of a descent to the infernal regions can be at all
worthy of a comparison with it. I soon met with many of my old Botany
Bay acquaintances, who were all eager to offer me their friendship and
services,—that is, with a view to rob me of what little I had; for in
this place there is no other motive or subject for ingenuity. All former
friendships or connexions are dissolved, and a man here will rob his
best benefactor, or even mess-mate, of an article worth one halfpenny.
Every morning, at seven o’clock, all the convicts capable of work, or,
in fact, all who are capable of getting into the boats, are taken ashore
to the Warren, in which the royal arsenal and other public buildings are
situated, and are there employed at various kinds of labour, some of them
very fatiguing; and while so employed, each gang of sixteen, or twenty
men, is watched and directed by a fellow called a guard. These guards
are most commonly of the lowest class of human beings; wretches devoid
of all feeling; ignorant in the extreme, brutal by nature, and rendered
tyrannical and cruel by the consciousness of the power they possess;
no others, but such as I have described, would hold the situation,
their wages being not more than a day-labourer would earn in London.
They invariably carry a large and ponderous stick, with which, without
the smallest provocation, they will fell an unfortunate convict to the
ground, and frequently repeat their blows long after the poor sufferer is
insensible. At noon the working party return on board to dinner, and at
one again go on shore, where they labour till near sun-set. On returning
on board in the evening, all hands are mustered by a roll, and the whole
being turned down below, the hatches are put over them, and secured for
the night. As to the food, the stipulated ration is very scanty, but of
even part of that they are defrauded. Their provisions being supplied by
contractors, and not by Government, are of the worst kind, such as would
not be considered eatable or wholesome elsewhere; and both the weight
and measure are always deficient. The allowance of bread is said to be
about twenty ounces per day. Three days in the week they have about four
ounces of cheese for dinner, and the other four days a pound of beef. The
breakfast is invariably boiled barley, of the coarsest kind imaginable;
and of this the pigs of the hulk come in for a third part, because it is
so nauseous that nothing but downright hunger will enable a man to eat
it. For supper, they have, on banyan days, burgoo, of as good a quality
as the barley, and which is similarly disposed of; and on meat days,
the water in which the beef was boiled, is thickened with barley, and
forms a mess called “Smiggins,” of a more detestable nature than either
of the two former! The reader may conceive that I do not exaggerate,
when I state, that among the convicts the common price of these several
eatables, is,—for a day’s allowance of beef, one halfpenny;—ditto, of
cheese, one halfpenny;—ditto, of bread, three-halfpence; but the cheese
is most commonly so bad, that they throw it away. It is manufactured, I
believe, of skimmed milk for this particular contract. The beef generally
consists of old bulls, or cows who have died of age or famine; the
least trace of fat is considered a phenomenon, and it is far inferior
upon the whole to good horse-flesh. I once saw the prisoners throw
the whole day’s supply overboard the moment it was hoisted out of the
boat, and for this offence they were severely flogged. The friends of
these unhappy persons are not allowed to come on board, but must remain
alongside during their visit; the prisoners are, it is true, suffered
to go into their boat, but a guard is placed within hearing of their
conversation, and if a friend or parent has come one hundred miles,
they are not allowed above ten minutes’ interview; so that instead of
consolation, the visit only excites regret at the parties being so
suddenly torn asunder. All letters, too, written by prisoners, must be
delivered unsealed to the chief mate for his inspection, before they are
sent ashore; and such as he thinks obnoxious, are of course suppressed.
In like manner, all letters received from the post-office are opened and
scrutinized. If I were to attempt a full description of the miseries
endured in these ships, I could fill a volume; but I shall sum up all
by stating, that besides robbery from each other, which is as common as
cursing and swearing, I witnessed among the prisoners themselves, during
the twelvemonth I remained with them, one deliberate murder, for which
the perpetrator was executed at Maidstone, and one suicide; and that
unnatural crimes are openly committed.




CHAPTER X.

    _I embark a second Time for New South Wales.—Indulgently
    treated by the Captain.—My Employment during the Voyage.—Arrive
    at Port Jackson after an Absence of Four Years.—My Reception
    from Governor Macquarrie.—Assigned by Lot to a Settler.—His
    brutal Treatment of me.—I find means to quit his Service, and
    return to Sydney._


From the description I have briefly given of the hulks, the reader will
easily believe I ardently longed for the moment which was to release me
from so miserable an existence. That happy day at length arrived. On the
15th of June, 1810, I was removed from the Retribution, in company with
fifty-four others, to Long-reach, a few miles below Woolwich, where we
were put on board the Indian, which ship had recently been fitted at
Deptford for the reception of two hundred prisoners. The next day we
sailed for Gravesend, and at this place I anxiously hoped for a farewell
visit from my wife, to whom I had written from Woolwich on the morning
of my embarkation, acquainting her with my approaching departure. She
had attended me at least once a month, during my stay at Woolwich, and
supported me as well as her circumstances would permit. We remained
at Gravesend three days, but she did not appear; and in our progress
from thence to Spithead, we took on board at the Nore forty-five more
convicts from the Zealand hulk at Sheerness. In a few days we arrived
at Spithead, where we received one hundred prisoners from the hulks at
Portsmouth, and Langston harbour; soon after which I had a letter from my
wife, stating that she had arrived at Gravesend on the evening of the day
our ship departed, and brought with her a supply of the most necessary
articles for my comfort; that on finding, to her grief, that she was too
late, she had been advised to follow the ship to Sheerness; which she, in
fact, did, and arrived at that place on the very day after we had taken
in the prisoners, and immediately proceeded on our voyage, without even
coming to an anchor. Thus she was again fatally disappointed; and having
incurred this expense, and endured much fatigue, she had been obliged to
return to town; but added, that if possible, she would see me before we
sailed from Portsmouth. This, however, she was not enabled to accomplish,
her health and circumstances being both unfavourable to the undertaking.
But I received, on the 18th of July, when we were quite ready for, and in
hourly expectation of, sailing, a letter from her, in which she expressed
her concern at not being in a condition to visit me; but gave me advice
that she had packed up some clothes and other necessaries, of which
she enclosed a list; and that the trunk containing them would arrive
by the Gosport coach at a certain time and place. I had not received
this letter from the hands of our captain above half an hour, when the
Lion of 64 made the signal to weigh; and from that moment no boat was
permitted to leave the ship, so that I went to sea without the smallest
comfort for the voyage, or any wearing apparel except the suit of slops
I had on. We accordingly got under weigh immediately, and sailed, in
company with the Lion, and the Chichester store-ship. The former had on
board the Persian ambassador and suite, and was bound for Bombay. The
latter was destined for St. Helena, and we were to accompany them (under
convoy,) as far as the latitude of the Cape of Good Hope. We were no
sooner at sea, than Captain Barclay, who had been induced to notice me
from the recommendation of a female passenger who was going out to New
South Wales, and who (singular to relate,) had actually come home with
me in H. M. Ship Buffalo; the Captain, I say, from her representation of
my abilities, and from an application I made to him by letter, treated
me with peculiar kindness. I was released from irons, and appointed
to assist the steward in the issue of provisions, _&c._, both to the
prisoners, the ship’s company, and the troops. As the steward himself was
not very expert, and an indifferent scholar, I had the chief management
of the whole business, and the arrangement of all the victualling
accounts. From the experience I had formerly gained, I was perfectly at
home in this situation, and gave satisfaction to all parties. I also
wrote the ship’s log-book, and executed many services with my pen for
Captain Barclay himself. The effects of this favourable distinction and
confidence were, that I had every personal comfort the ship afforded
during our passage, lived tolerably well, and accumulated a decent change
of clothing to equip myself on our arrival at Port-Jackson. Nothing but
the usual routine of occurrences befel us in this voyage. We touched
first at Madeira, and afterwards at Rio-de-Janeiro, but our stay at both
places was short. The day after we quitted the latter, in company with
our Commodore and the store-ship; both these vessels so far outsailed us,
that we lost sight of them and separated, continuing our course alone
without interruption, and, with tolerable expedition, to the end of our
voyage. On the 16th of December, we anchored in Sydney-cove, from which
place I had been absent nearly four years.

I soon learnt that the news of my second transportation, and in fact of
my principal adventures in London, had preceded my own arrival; and that,
consequently, no surprise was excited by my appearance, I also heard, to
my mortification, that from the changes which had taken place in public
affairs since my departure from the colony, most of the departments
were filled by strangers, from whom I could expect no indulgence; and
that not only these officers, but the Governor himself, had conceived
a violent prejudice against those unfortunate and misguided persons,
who by a renewal of their vicious courses on returning to their native
country, subject themselves to a second disgraceful banishment, and
seem thereby to indicate that they are incapable of reformation, and
systematically depraved. From this intimation I had reason to expect
a cool reception; whereas, during my former residence in the colony,
I witnessed many instances of persons who returned under the sentence
of the law, being most cordially received, and preferred to any vacant
appointment much sooner than a stranger. On the 24th of December, I was
landed with the rest of the prisoners, and the whole of us were drawn
up in the jail-yard for the Governor’s inspection. It seems I had been
particularly pointed out to his Excellency; for on approaching me, he
asked me several questions respecting my employment under Governor King,
and concluded with desiring Mr. Nicholls, the superintendent, to dispose
of me at present to the Hawkesbury. His Excellency, however, paused a
few moments before coming to this decision, and I was in hopes he had
an idea of giving me a clerical employment. The Governor then added,
that if I behaved well, something might in time be done for me, or to
that effect. I was much disappointed on this occasion, as I too well
knew the hardships I should have to encounter, if sent up the country
and assigned to a settler. However, it was in vain to murmur, and about
fifty of us were immediately conveyed by water to Parramatta, from whence
we walked next day to Hawkesbury. On arriving at the town of Windsor,
the settlers having been summoned by the magistrates, and there being a
greater number of applicants for men servants than there were prisoners
to dispose of, our names were written on tickets, and intermixed with
a sufficient number of blanks, (we being the prizes at the disposal of
Dame Fortune,) and then each settler in turn drew a ticket, which on
being opened, published the good or ill luck of the drawer. It was my
fate to be drawn by a settler called “Big Ben,” and with him I quitted
the scene of action, and prepared to remove my little baggage to the
farm of my new master. As I had been intimately acquainted with this
man, and in fact with every inhabitant of Hawkesbury, when I formerly
officiated as clerk to Mr. Baker, the store-keeper, I flattered myself
that he would treat me with more kindness, or at least with less severity
than a total stranger; and every one who recollected me, declared I had
been fortunate in getting such a master; and that Ben, on the other
hand, could not have drawn a man more eminently qualified to render
him essential service; as, although his agricultural and commercial
speculations were both extensive, he was himself perfectly illiterate,
and obliged to hire a free man to attend him at stated times, and arrange
his books. But I soon found, to my sorrow, that I had little reason for
self-congratulation. ’Tis true, this ignorant and good-for-nothing fellow
was glad to avail himself of my talents, and thereby save the expense
he had before incurred; but he thought it too much to support me in a
ration of provisions in return for my services, though I should have
been satisfied therewith. His avarice was such, that he expected me to
act in the double capacity of his clerk and labourer; and he accordingly
measured out the prescribed portion of ground which he required me to
break up with the hoe, well knowing I had not been accustomed to hard
labour, and that I was in fact incapable of the task. My remonstrances
produced the most unfeeling replies on his part, accompanied with threats
of getting me flogged, and every other species of tyrannical persecution.
This wretch, though now possessed of thousands, was a few years ago one
of the poorest objects in the colony, and as defective in bodily as
in mental endowments; nor was his present opulence so much the effect
of laudable industry, as of a natural low cunning he possessed, which
qualified him to take advantage of floods, temporary scarcities, and
other casual events; and becoming an adept in the arts of monopoly and
extortion, he by degrees attained the rank of a first-rate settler, and,
in the opinion of his dependants, but much more so in his own, is a man
of consequence. His late prosperity has rendered him over-bearing and
cruel to his inferiors (I mean in fortune,) while he is meanly servile
to his superiors. In fact, the old proverb “Set a beggar on horseback,”
_&c._, was never more aptly applied than to “Big Ben.” According to
the lately-established custom, I had been assigned to this brute,
by indenture, for three years; but the misery of my situation daily
increasing, I determined to try every method of obtaining my deliverance
from his power. After struggling with many hardships for about five
weeks, during which I was generally employed at some laborious work in
the field, or in drudgery about the house, from morning till evening,
and sleeping in a barn over-run with vermin at night, I at length
found means, through the friendly aid of an acquaintance, to escape
from the hands of my persecutor, though much against his will; and the
reader may judge of the malignity of his disposition by the following
circumstance. I must premise that I could get away by no other means than
counterfeiting sickness; in consequence of which I was ordered (by the
humanity of the resident surgeon,) to the general hospital at Sydney. It
would appear that Benn[50] suspected this stratagem, for, after trying
all he could to obstruct my success, he used these remarkable words at
parting, “Aye, you may go;—but if you are six months in the hospital,
I’ll have you again when you come out. I know you’re of no use to me,
but I’ll keep you, if it’s only to torment you.” However, as his avarice
would not allow him to send a fortnight’s ration with me to the hospital,
(in which case he might have reclaimed me had I been then discharged,)
I knew myself to be effectually free from his further persecution; and
I had soon afterwards the pleasure to hear that he had applied for, and
obtained, another man in my room. Indeed, so great was my aversion to
this unfeeling monster, that I was determined to endure corporal or other
punishment rather than have returned to him: but surely, the threat he
used on my leaving him, ought, when made known, to have precluded him
from ever having it in his power to realize so hellish an idea!




CHAPTER XI.

    _Appointed an Overseer.—Determine to reform my Life, and become
    a new Man.—All my good Intentions rendered unavailing by an
    unforeseen and unavoidable Misfortune.—I become a Victim to
    Prejudice and the Depravity of a Youth in Years, but a Veteran
    in Iniquity.—I am banished to the Coal River._


After a month’s confinement in the hospital I was discharged and
transferred to the town-gang, in which, however, I laboured but a few
weeks; for a deputy-overseer of the jail-gang being wanted, Mr. Nicholls,
the superintendent, requested me to undertake the office, which, he
observed, would be an introduction to something better, if I behaved with
propriety. I, therefore, gladly accepted the offer, although neither the
situation was lucrative, nor its duties agreeable. I had, on landing from
the Indian, made a firm and solemn resolution never again to deviate from
the strictest probity, or to subject myself any more to a repetition
of those sufferings which are the inevitable consequence of irregular
conduct. Knowing, by fatal experience, the value of a good, or even an
easy, employment, I determined if I should ever again obtain an eligible
situation, to take proper care of it; and, I as solemnly declare,
notwithstanding my present condition, and the punishment I have since
endured, that I have uniformly adhered to those resolutions; nor does
my conscience upbraid me with one single act at which I ought to blush,
since my arrival in the colony. But the subject of the present Chapter
will prove that the best intentions of mankind are sometimes thwarted and
rendered abortive; and that a person who is destined to be unfortunate,
will be so, _maugre_ every exertion, and let him be never so circumspect.

Soon after my return to Sydney, I met with a youth named Edwards, who had
been my mess-mate and bed-fellow on board the Indian, and for whom I had
conceived a particular regard. He informed me that he lived as servant
in the family of Mr. Bent, the judge-advocate, where he had an excellent
place, and invited me to call and see him. As I had rendered him many
acts of service on the voyage, he now wished, (he said,) having it in
his power to shew his gratitude for my kindness. Accordingly, I called
upon him twice, and saw him in his master’s kitchen, (which was detached
from the dwelling-house,) in the presence of several other servants.
I told him I lived in the house of Mr. Colles, in Philip-street, and
should be happy to see him when his leisure would permit. He soon
afterwards visited me, and treated me with some rum, Colles being a
publican. Observing him to have a considerable sum of money about him
for a youth in his situation, and knowing him to have been utterly
destitute on his landing, I expressed my surprise, and earnestly
cautioned him against any acts of dishonesty which might endanger his
losing so good a place, and must, I assured him, inevitably bring him
to disgrace and ruin. He positively declared that he had done no wrong;
but that his mistress, who was very partial to him, frequently gave him
a small sum for pocket-money, and that the gentry who visited at his
master’s, made him numerous and handsome presents. I knew all this to
be possible, and I was the more inclined to believe him, because (as he
himself rightly observed,) he had no occasion to use deceit with me, in
whom he might safely have reposed the fullest confidence. I, however,
repeated my cautions and advice, and we soon afterwards parted. A few
days having elapsed, he paid me a second visit, and proposed that we
should take a walk together, which we accordingly did; and having taken
some refreshment, and amused ourselves for a couple of hours, he quitted
me and returned home. I saw no more of Edwards for about a week; when
one day, as I sat at dinner with Mr. Colles and his family, he came in
rather abruptly, and requested to speak with me. I rose from the table,
and taking him into an adjoining room, he there took from his pocket
several colonial bills, and begged I would take care of them for an hour
or two, as something had occurred at his master’s house, and he did not
wish it to be known that he possessed so much money. He also delivered
his watch into my care, and taking off one of his shoes, produced from
it another paper, which he told me, in rather a significant manner, his
mistress had that morning given him. I saw something so mysterious in
this conduct, and my former doubts were so far revived, that I hesitated,
and begged earnestly that he would not deceive me, but confess if he had
done any thing wrong; adding that if I was fully apprized of the case, I
should be the better enabled to render him this service, and to conceal
the money more effectually, without risking my own safety. This, indeed,
I only said with a view to come at the truth; for, had he confessed to
me what I suspected, though I certainly should not have betrayed him, I
was so firmly resolved to avoid all improper connexions, that I should
have declined taking charge of the money, and from that moment have
dropped all intercourse with him. He, however, so vehemently protested
his innocence, and urged me to oblige him, repeating that he could have
no motive for deceiving me, that I suffered him to depart, which he did
as abruptly as he had entered. In fact, the whole transaction did not
occupy above five minutes, and was so sudden and unexpected that I had
no time for reflection, and scarce knew what I did. On his departure,
I put the papers carelessly in my waistcoat-pocket, and the watch in my
fob, from which the riband hung conspicuous. As to the latter article,
I knew it to be his own property, having seen him wear it publicly for
several weeks. I now rejoined the family, and sat down to finish my
dinner. The cloth being drawn, I communicated the particulars of my
interview with Edwards to my friend Colles, of whose experience and
integrity I had the highest opinion. I produced the papers Edwards had
given me, declaring that I felt uneasy on the occasion, and wished
him (Mr. Colles,) to advise me how I should act. On looking over the
papers, we found about 5_l._ 10_s._ in small colonial bills, and the
paper which Edwards took from his shoe, proved to be a store-receipt
for 8_l._ 15_s._! Colles expressed his concern that I had suffered
Edwards to leave them at all, saying that he saw clearly through the
whole business; and earnestly advised me, for my own security, to go
immediately to the judge-advocate’s: and, let who would be present, to
return the whole to Edwards in the most public manner, with a declaration
that I would have nothing to do with them. This friendly advice I so far
approved, that I determined to follow it implicitly; but, unfortunately
for me, I proposed to smoke half a pipe first, and declared I would then
immediately go. I had just lighted my pipe, and taken a seat near the
door, which was open, when I heard somebody approach, and turning my
head, saw two constables at the gate, who directly entered the house, and
one of them addressing me, said, he came with an order to search my box.
I, of course, felt a little confused, but, conscious of my innocence, I
boldly answered that my box was at hand, and they were welcome to search
it; but requested to know what they were seeking for, adding, that if
I knew, I might perhaps save them that trouble. One of them replied,
“It is something about the judge-advocate’s servant.” I now instantly
perceived that I had but one part to act for my own preservation, and in
which I considered myself justified by the palpable deceit Edwards had
used towards me. I, therefore, said that the young man they mentioned,
had just been with me, and left some property in my care, which I would
deliver up to them; and accordingly produced the bills and the watch.
Immediately on seeing the store-receipt, they exclaimed, “This is what
we wanted.” They declared that I had acted perfectly right in giving
up the property; but desired I would accompany them to Mr. Redman, the
chief-constable; and assured me that my open conduct would undoubtedly
acquit me of any blame in the transaction. I willingly attended them,
and learnt by the way, that Edwards was lodged in jail, on suspicion
of robbing his master. On arriving at Mr. Redman’s, the latter, being
informed of what had passed, desired I would wait in his house until
he had reported the whole to Mr. Bent, and received that gentleman’s
further commands. In half an hour Mr. Redman returned, and informed me
that Mr. Bent fully approved of my conduct, that I was at liberty to
depart, and if again wanted, I should be sent for. My friend Colles
expressed his approbation also, of the step I had taken; but was sorry I
had not anticipated the constables, by going myself to the judge’s house
the moment he had so advised me; and for that omission I certainly was
highly blameable, and have since severely suffered. The transaction above
described took place on a Friday, and I heard no more on the subject
till the following Monday, when going to the jail at two o’clock to take
out the working party, I was met at the jail-door by Mr. Redman, who
informed me he was ordered by the Governor to confine me in a cell. I
was of course thunder-struck at this intimation; but as the order was
peremptory, I submitted, and was immediately locked up, after sending
notice of my situation to Mr. Colles. I remained in close confinement
during the whole week, in the course of which I learnt that Edwards,
who was lodged in another cell, had undergone a private examination
before his master on the preceding Saturday, and it was supposed he had
(God knows falsely,) implicated me as an accomplice in his guilt. The
ensuing Saturday, I was taken before a bench of magistrates, where I
also met Edwards, but had no communication with him. The latter was
then called for, and now appeared in the court, to my surprise, as an
approver, or evidence, against a woman known by the name of Peggy the
Miller, from her former husband having been of that profession. This
woman had, unknown to me, been also confined the whole week on Edwards’s
accusation. I remained among the crowd at the door of the court-house,
where I was enabled to hear the proceedings I am now going to describe.
Edwards deposed that the said Margaret had lately quitted the service of
Mr. Bent, but had lived some time in the family as his fellow-servant.
That soon after deponent’s coming to the house, she one day proposed to
him to take some money from his master’s writing desk, and offered to
procure him the keys for that purpose; that he accordingly did so, and
divided the spoil (about 5_l._,) with her. Being desired to proceed, he
continued, “A few days afterwards, she again proposed to me to take some
more money, and I took about the same sum as before.” These depositions
being committed to writing, by the court, and being extracted with
some difficulty from the witness, and attended with many questions and
remarks from the magistrates present[51], of course occupied some time,
and, on the court desiring Edwards to go on, he was about to proceed
in the same words, “A few days after,” _&c._; but the court, I suppose,
conceiving him capable of saying any thing in order to save himself,
and, as he could neither particularize any of the money or bills, said
to be so taken, trace their disposal, or produce one single circumstance
to corroborate his assertions, they declined hearing any more, and put
the woman on her defence; who stated generally, that every syllable of
Edwards’s evidence was false and malicious; that during her residence
in the family, she had such frequent opportunities of observing the
conduct of Edwards, and so much reason to believe he was in the constant
habit of pilfering, that, out of regard to her own safety, being a
free woman, and to prevent her being unjustly suspected, she one day
requested her mistress to discharge her, and on being questioned as to
her motives for such a wish, and pressed to continue in her place, she
evaded a full explanation, but consented to continue on condition of
Mrs. Bent herself keeping the keys of the various drawers, _&c._, and
not suffering them to lie about as they had hitherto done. That she had
reason to believe this conversation had come to the knowledge of Edwards;
for the latter soon afterwards grossly abused her, and threatened to
stab her with a knife, if ever he found that she told any tales of him,
or pryed into his proceedings. That supposing her mistress, from this
circumstance, to be too much prepossessed in his favour, and fearing
the consequences of Edwards’s wicked disposition, she had accordingly
persisted in requesting, and finally obtained, her discharge; since which
she had married an industrious mechanic, and lived in good repute. The
court was now cleared, and after some deliberation re-opened, when the
bench informed her, that the evidence of Edwards being unsupported by
any other testimony, the court were of opinion the charge had not been
substantiated, and she was therefore discharged from custody. During the
preceding examination, Edwards had never once mentioned my name, but
accused this woman as his sole accomplice, and every person present, as
well as myself, concluded I should be immediately liberated; but the
woman had no sooner retired, than I was called to the bar, and stood
charged, together with Edwards, “with breaking open the writing-desk of
Ellis Bent, Esquire, and stealing thereout several sums of money!” To
this charge, Edwards, who appeared no longer capable of dissimulation,
pleaded “Guilty.” I, of course, solemnly denied any knowledge of,
or participation in, his guilt; and briefly stated the part I had
acted, calling upon Mr. Colles, Mr. Redman, and the two constables,
to corroborate my account, which they did in every particular I have
before recited. The court then appearing to hesitate, Mr. Cubitt, the
jailer, with an over-officious zeal to shew himself assiduous, produced
a written paper, which he stated to be the declaration or confession
of Edwards, when taken before the judge, his late master, on the day
after his apprehension; adding, that the court might perhaps wish to
hear it. To this, the members assenting, one of them accordingly read to
the following effect; “That Edwards confessed having repeatedly robbed
his master’s desk of money, in which practice he had been solely aided,
abetted, and encouraged by Vaux! That Vaux had contrived an instrument
in order to pick the lock of the writing-desk; and that on one occasion,
Vaux happening to come without his instrument, had made use of a fork,
one prong of which he bent for the purpose! That another time he had
made use of a large nail! and that the nail now produced, which had been
found on Mr. Bent’s premises, was the identical nail so used! [This nail
Cubitt exhibited to the court; it was a common nail with a brass head,
about four inches long, and the point appeared to have been turned by
driving it in a stone or brick wall.] That Edwards and Vaux had jointly
taken by these means at various times about sixty pounds, which had been
equally shared between them.” This improbable account, one would suppose,
could have excited no other sensation than that of laughter; for, could
it be seriously entertained for a moment, that with such instruments as
those he described, a man could possibly open so minute a lock as that
of a writing desk, and afterwards re-lock it so securely as to escape
detection? The fact, doubtless, was, that Edwards, who had access to his
master’s keys, had himself committed the depredation without the aid
of any other person or instrument. All this I submitted to the court,
and further desired them to consider the situation in which I stood,
being merely accused by a very wicked youth, who had already confessed
his own guilt, and had laboured to implicate an innocent woman, as the
court had declared her to be. I then dwelt on the candour and openness
of my conduct respecting the money he had left with me, which I could
have effectually concealed, had I been at all privy to the guilt of
Edwards; and I called Mr. Colles, who swore, “That I had resided in his
house since the day of my discharge from the hospital; that during that
period (about six weeks,) I had lived a most orderly and regular life;
and that he had never seen me possessed of any money except a half-crown
bill, which he himself gave me to pay for my washing.” I concluded with
observing, that Edwards himself, having confessed his crime, could, if
he thought proper to tell the truth, at once acquit me of any share in
his guilt. The court then asked me, “If I was willing to trust myself to
Edwards’s answer, if they questioned him on the subject?” I answered,
that bad as he had proved himself, I could not believe him so totally
depraved as to persist in the wicked story he had before told, now that
he was standing at my elbow, and could no longer hope to extricate
himself at my expense; and I, therefore, begged he might be questioned.
The bench then asked Edwards, “If there was any truth in the story he had
told his master about Vaux?” when, to my surprise and unspeakable horror,
he answered, (hanging down his head,) “Yes, Gentlemen, it is, every word
of it, true!”

Mr. Redman now stated to the court, that on Mr. Bent missing this
store-receipt from his desk, he had sent for him; and informing him that
he suspected his servant Edwards to have been in the habit of robbing
him, as he had frequently missed small bills which he could not identify,
requested he, Mr. Redman, would endeavour to find out what connexions
the youth had formed, with a view to the detection of his guilt, and,
if possible to trace the receipt in question, which he had but that
morning deposited in his desk, and should be enabled to recognise by
the number and other particulars. Upon which Mr. Redman answered, that
he recollected seeing Edwards pass by his house one evening in company
with me, and supposed we might be intimate; that Mr. Bent then desired
he would have my lodgings searched, which (after consigning Edwards to
custody,) he had proceeded to do in the manner I have above related.
The court was now a second time cleared, and nearly an hour occupied
in consultation; when Edwards and myself were again called in, and the
bench informed Edwards, that he, having confessed his guilt, the court
had sentenced him to receive one hundred lashes at the cart’s tail, in
the streets of Sydney, and to be kept to hard labour in the jail-gang for
twelve months. Then, addressing me, the bench observed that the evidence
of Edwards not appearing to the court entitled to much credit, and being
unsupported by other testimony, the court acquitted me of any share in
the actual robbery of Mr. Bent; but were of opinion that I had been privy
to the guilt of Edwards, and had received the money from him, knowing it
to be stolen! and they had therefore sentenced me also to twelve months
labour in the jail-gang. Thus ended an examination, which I believe is
scarcely to be paralleled in the records of a court, either as to its
foundation, progress, or result; and I now found to my cost, that I was
in this instance also, the victim of an unjust prejudice, for one of
the members (who shall be nameless,) said to me, in the course of the
proceedings, “Recollect, Mr. Vaux, this is the second time of your being
sent to this colony; we know you well.” I answered, with secret, and, I
hope justifiable indignation, “Surely, Sir, that ought not to operate
against me, if my conduct has been uniformly good since my late arrival,
and I trust that will bear the test of inquiry.”

I have since learned that Edwards, after his being committed to jail,
having heard that I had given up the money he left with me, conceived
I had acted treacherously towards him; and, therefore, with the double
motive of injuring me, and palliating his own guilt, had the next day
requested to be taken before his master, and feigning contrition, had
then fabricated the vile and improbable story recited by Cubitt to the
court; artfully judging that I being much older than himself, should be
considered the most culpable, and he as an innocent youth, led astray by
my machinations.

After receiving our sentence, the corporal part of which was severely
inflicted on Edwards, I continued to labour in the jail-gang for about
three weeks, when, by an order from the Governor, as I understood, both
myself and Edwards were double-ironed, put on board a government vessel,
with several other prisoners, and transported to Newcastle, commonly
called the “Coal river,” without any definite term being fixed for our
exile; and as we were both prisoners for life, it was uncertain how long
our banishment might be protracted.




CHAPTER XII.

    _Return to Head Quarters after an Exile of two Years.—Renew my
    Vows of Rectitude, to which I strictly adhere.—Proposal made me
    to obtain my Liberty.—I make the Attempt.—Its Failure, and the
    consequent Punishment inflicted on me.—Conclusion._


On arriving at Newcastle, I was first employed in wheeling coals out of
the mines, a most laborious occupation indeed; but during my continuance
at that settlement, I was put to all descriptions of work, and for the
last three months, performed the duty of a constable, or watchman.
Since the day on which the transaction at Colles’s took place, I never
exchanged a word with the villain Edwards. He had been but a few weeks
at Newcastle, before he committed a robbery, and absconded to the woods,
from which he was brought back by some natives a naked and miserable
object. His subsequent conduct at the coal river exhibited nothing but a
succession of robberies, and every species of depravity; when detected
in which, on several occasions, he betrayed his accomplices, and proved
as perfidious as he was dishonest. He frequently escaped by land, amidst
innumerable hardships, to Sydney; where, after the commission of some
robbery, he was uniformly apprehended, and sent back to Newcastle. In
fact, though scarce twenty years of age, nothing was wanting to fill up
the measure of his wickedness, but the blackest of all crimes,—an act of
murder! and, as if he laboured to attain the summit of human depravity,
that act he soon afterwards virtually committed; for being at length,
on one of his elopements from the coal river, apprehended and lodged in
Sydney jail, at a period when many prisoners, of bad character, were
about being embarked for the settlements on Van Diemen’s land, Edwards
was included in the number. He there renewed his iniquitous courses;
associating with a band of ruffians, who escaped to the woods, and there
subsisted by plundering the settlers, robbing on the highway, _&c._ A
party of these miscreants (eight in number,) were one day attacked by
some armed persons, who had assembled together, and gone in pursuit of
them; a serious conflict ensued, the marauders, also, being well armed;
and after several shots had been exchanged, the settlers were obliged to
retreat, several of their number being severely wounded, and one killed
on the spot by the fire of the free-booters. The consequence of this
outrage was, that the whole of the latter were immediately declared by
proclamation to be in a state of outlawry, and a large reward offered
for the apprehension of all or either of them. As parties of military,
as well as the inhabitants, were detached in all directions, there is no
doubt but the whole of these desperadoes have long since received the
due reward of their villany. This account I read in a Sydney Gazette
a few months ago, and among the names of the bush-rangers, (as they
are termed,) who jointly committed the above outrage and murder, I was
shocked, though not surprised, to see that of the young, but depraved,
Edwards!

Having continued nearly two years at the coal-river, the commanding
officer was induced, in consideration of my uniform good behaviour, to
permit my return to Sydney, on my arrival at which place, I was once
more disposed of in the town-gang. Being advised to solicit the Governor
for an appointment to some less laborious employment, I waited on His
Excellency with a petition, in which I urged my exemplary behaviour for
the last two years at Newcastle; as a proof that whatever my former
conduct might have been, I was now disposed to reform; and entreating
His Excellency to divest himself of that prejudice which I feared had
already operated against me too severely, humbly prayed that he would
make trial of me in the only capacity in which I was capable of being
useful, namely, that of a clerk in one of the public-offices. Unhappily
for me, the cloud was not yet dispelled, but threatened to obscure, still
longer, the prospect of advancement and prosperity which I had in vain
sighed for, and fondly pictured to myself as the certain consequence of a
thorough reformation in principle. The Governor very coolly answered that
it was not merely my having behaved well for two years at the coal-river,
but I must conduct myself with propriety for a series of years, before
I could expect, or ought to apply for, any mark of indulgence. This
answer was certainly disheartening in the extreme; and I was equally
unsuccessful in an application to the then acting commissary, William
Broughton, Esq., who, although he never saw me until my arrival in the
Indian, not being in the colony during my former term of exile, yet this
gentleman, from hearing only of my repeated frauds while employed in
the office of Governor King, (and which no doubt were much exaggerated
by report and repetition after my departure for Europe,) had conceived
so violent a dislike to me, that he gave me a decisive, though civil,
denial; and I have since heard, that he declared I should not hold a
situation in the commissariat, if there was not another clerk in the
colony. God grant that some well-disposed christian, who reads these
Memoirs of my unhappy Life, may induce this gentleman, for whose shining
talents and excellent qualities I have the highest respect, to retract
his discouraging declaration, and to admit me to an employment, however
subordinate, in his department, which, as I am now situated, forms the
_ne plus ultra_ of my ambition.

To resume my narrative: finding from these disheartening failures, that
I had nothing to hope for but a continuance of suffering and bodily
fatigue, far above my strength, for many succeeding years, perhaps for
the remainder of my life; surely no dispassionate reader will pronounce
me culpable, or consider that I deviated from the resolutions I had
formed, to act correctly while I lived, if I listened with eagerness to
an offer of assistance in effecting my escape from a state of bondage
which became every day more irksome and galling, in proportion as I
reflected that my inoffensive conduct fairly entitled me to a share of
that favour and indulgence I every day saw extended to objects I knew
less worthy than myself. In fact, a person belonging to the Earl Spencer,
Indiaman, then on the point of sailing for Ceylon and Bombay, did, in
the month of January, 1814, from motives of pure and disinterested
compassion, propose that I should conceal myself, with his assistance,
on board that ship, and promised me every support in his power. I
accepted with joy and gratitude this unexpected offer, and, without any
difficulty, got on board, and, as I thought, effectually concealed, on
the night of the Queen’s birth-day. I lay close and undiscovered for
four days, and on the fifth had the pleasure to hear that the ship would
that day finally sail, she having already dropped down the harbour.
But, how often is the cup of happiness dashed from the lips of mortals!
On the 23d of January, about ten o’clock in the forenoon, my friend
came to me in my place of concealment, and informed me that upwards of
thirty constables were come on board to search the ship, for that so
many prisoners were missing from their respective employments, that the
Governor would not suffer the ship to depart until they were found. He,
however, assured me it was very unlikely any search would take place
in the spot I was in, and, indeed, I considered it next to impossible
that I could be discovered, unless I was betrayed. I remained in a state
of the utmost anxiety for three hours, during which a vigilant search
was making in every other part of the ship; not by the constables, for
they would have been unequal to the task, but by a mate of the vessel,
assisted by several sailors. At length, I heard voices approaching, and
eagerly listening, I was convinced by the discourse which passed between
the parties, that they knew exactly where I was concealed, and that I
really had been, by somebody, most villanously betrayed. In a moment
the mate advanced, as it were mechanically, towards me, and thrusting
his candle into the entrance of my hiding-place, desired me, in a
peremptory tone, to come out. Thus were my fond hopes of liberty and
happiness effectually destroyed. I had become a second time the victim
of treachery; but as more than one person, besides my principal abettor,
knew of my concealment, I was at a loss whom to suspect as the informer.
I was now ordered into a boat alongside, in which were about a dozen
other men and several women, who had been found concealed in various
situations. The search being not yet over, I remained alongside the ship
above an hour, in which time the number of ill-fated persons collected
in the boat had increased to twenty-seven men and four women. The ship
having now been thoroughly ransacked, the search was given up, and the
persons taken out were brought ashore, attended by the constables. We
were all immediately lodged in gaol; and the next day, a report having
been made to the Governor, His Excellency was pleased to order each man
to be punished with fifty lashes in the public lumber yard. This sentence
was certainly as lenient as could be expected for such an attempt (I do
not say offence) as we had been guilty of, had the punishment stopped
there; but, extraordinary to relate, although we had been all equally
culpable and were found under the same circumstances, a distinction was
subsequently made, which I cannot help still considering unfair and
unmerited. The day after the corporal punishment had been inflicted,
twenty-three of our number were ordered to return to the respective
employments in Sydney, from which they had severally absconded, and
myself and three others were sentenced by the Governor to be sent to the
coal-river for one year; for this distinction, there appears to have been
no other reason, but because we had each of us before suffered a similar
banishment, and had been but a few months returned from thence to Sydney!
In a few days, I was accordingly embarked with eleven other prisoners,
and a second time landed at Newcastle, from whence I had been absent
nearly twelve months. On my arrival, it happened that the store-keeper
of that settlement was in want of a clerk, and he, applying to the
commandant for me, I was appointed to that situation, in which I still
continue; and having scrupulously adhered to my former vows of rectitude,
and used every exertion to render myself serviceable to my employer, and
to merit his good opinion, as well as that of the commandant, I have
had the satisfaction to succeed in these objects; and I am not without
hope, that when I am permitted to quit my present service and return to
Sydney, my good conduct will be rewarded with a more desirable situation.
I have now been upwards of seven years a prisoner, and knowing the
hopeless sentence under which I labour, shall, I trust, studiously avoid
in future every act which may subject me to the censure of my superiors,
or entail upon me a repetition of those sufferings I have already too
severely experienced. I have thus described (perhaps too minutely for
the reader’s patience) the various vicissitudes of my past life. Whether
the future will be so far diversified as to afford matter worthy of being
committed to paper, either to amuse a vacant hour, or to serve as a
beacon which may warn others to avoid the rocks on which I have unhappily
split, is only known to the great Disposer of events.


END OF THE MEMOIRS.




FOOTNOTES


[47] See Cant Dictionary.

[48] The public papers, in describing my second examination, had the
following paragraph. “The prisoner, on his first examination, was dressed
in the most fashionable style; but he was now completely metamorphosed,
being dressed in a drab great-coat, jockey-boots, and a Belcher
handkerchief, so as to have the appearance of a stage-coachman!”

[49] Subjoined to the report of my trial, in the public prints, was this
remark. “The prisoner, on his trial, had left off his false whiskers, his
powdered head-dress, and his eye-glass, and appeared in a loose great
coat and silk handkerchief!!” Indeed there were many similar pieces of
wit at my expense, and some compliments paid me on the dexterity with
which I exercised my vocation.

[50] His real name was John Benn.

[51] The judge-advocate himself did not attend.




                                    A
                          NEW AND COMPREHENSIVE
                                VOCABULARY
                                  OF THE
                             FLASH LANGUAGE,

                         COMPILED AND WRITTEN BY
                           _JAMES HARDY VAUX_.


_Note._ The Author has found it necessary to introduce frequently, in the
course of his definitions, technical, or cant words and phrases. This he
could not avoid without much tautology and unpleasing circumlocution. The
Reader will therefore take notice, that all such cant terms are placed in
_Italics_; and where at a loss to comprehend them, he has only to refer
to their alphabetical position for an explanation.




ORIGINAL DEDICATION.

_To THOMAS SKOTTOWE, Esq., of His Majesty’s 73d Regiment, Commandant of
Newcastle, in the Colony of New South Wales, and one of His Majesty’s
Justices of the Peace for that Territory._


SIR,

With the utmost deference and respect, I beg leave to submit to your
perusal the following sheets. The idea of such a compilation first
originated in the suggestion of a friend; and however the theme may
be condemned as exceptionable by narrow minds, I feel confident you
possess too much liberality of sentiment to reject its writer as utterly
depraved, because he has acquired an extensive knowledge on a subject
so obviously disgraceful. True it is, that in the course of a chequered
and eventful life, I have intermixed with the most dissolute and
unprincipled characters, and that a natural quickness of conception, and
most retentive memory, have rendered me familiar with their language and
system of operations.

Permit me, Sir, to assure you most seriously, that I view with remorse
the retrospect of my hitherto misspent life, and that my future exertions
shall be solely directed to acquire the estimable good opinion of the
virtuous part of the community.

I trust the Vocabulary will afford you some amusement from its novelty;
and that from the correctness of its definitions, you may occasionally
find it useful in your magisterial capacity.

I cannot omit this opportunity of expressing my gratitude for the very
humane and equitable treatment I have experienced, in common with every
other person in this settlement[52], under your temperate and judicious
government.

                       I have the honour to remain,
                      with the most dutiful respect,

                                   Sir,

                                    Your devoted, and very humble Servant,

                                                               J. H. VAUX.

_Newcastle, 5th July, 1812._




A VOCABULARY OF THE FLASH LANGUAGE.


A

ALDERMAN LUSHINGTON. _See_ LUSH.

ANDREW MILLER’S LUGGER, a king’s ship or vessel.

AREA SNEAK, or AREA SLUM, the practice of slipping unperceived down the
areas of private houses, and robbing the lower apartments of plate or
other articles.

ARM-PITS. To _work_ under _the arm-pits_, is to practise only such
kinds of depredation, as will amount, upon conviction, to what the law
terms single, or petty larceny; the extent of punishment for which is
transportation for seven years. By following this system, a thief avoids
the halter, which certainly is applied _above_ the arm-pits.

AWAKE, an expression used on many occasions; as a thief will say to his
accomplice, on perceiving the person they are about to rob is aware of
their intention, and upon his guard, _stow it_, the _cove’s awake_. To
be awake to any scheme, deception, or design, means, generally, to see
through or comprehend it.


B

BACK-JUMP. A back-window. _See_ JUMP.

BACK-SLANG, to enter or come out of a house by the back-door; or, to go
a circuitous or private way through the streets, in order to avoid any
particular place in the direct road, is termed _back-slanging it_.

BACK-SLUM, a back room; also the back entrance to any house or premises;
thus, we’ll _give it_ ’em _on the back-slum_, means, we’ll get in at the
back-door.

BAD HALFPENNY. When a man has been upon any errand, or attempting any
object which has proved unsuccessful or impracticable, he will say on his
return, It’s a _bad halfpenny_; meaning he has returned as he went.

BANDED, hungry.

BANDS. To _wear the bands_, is to be hungry, or short of food for any
length of time; a phrase chiefly used on board the hulks, or in jails.

BANG-UP. A person, whose dress or equipage is in the first style of
perfection, is declared to be _bang up to the mark_. A man who has
behaved with extraordinary spirit and resolution in any enterprise he has
been engaged in, is also said to have _come bang up to the mark_; any
article which is remarkably good or elegant, or any fashion, act, or
measure which is carried to the highest pitch, is likewise illustrated by
the same emphatical phrase.

BARKING-IRONS, pistols; an obsolete term.

BARNACLES, spectacles.

BASH, to beat any person by way of correction, as the woman you live
with, _&c._

BASTILE, generally called, for shortness, _the Steel_; a cant name for
the House of Correction, Cold-Bath-Fields, London.

BEAK, a magistrate; the late Sir John Fielding, of police memory, was
known among _family_ people by the title of the blind _beak_.

BEAN, a guinea.

BEEF, stop thief! to _beef_ a person, is to raise a hue and cry after
him, in order to get him stopped.

BELLOWSER. _See_ WIND.

BENDER, a sixpence.

BENDER, an ironical word used in conversation by _flash_ people; as where
one party affirms or professes any thing which the other believes to be
false or insincere, the latter expresses his incredulity by exclaiming
_bender_! or, if one asks another to do any act which the latter
considers unreasonable or impracticable, he replies, O yes, I’ll do
it—_bender_; meaning, by the addition of the last word, that, in fact, he
will do no such thing.

BEST, to _get your money at the best_, signifies to live by dishonest
or fraudulent practices, without labour or industry, according to the
general acceptation of the latter word; but, certainly, no persons have
more occasion to be industrious, and in a state of perpetual action than
_cross-coves_; and experience has proved, when too late, to many of them,
that honesty is the best policy; and, consequently, that the above phrase
is by no means _à-propos_.

BETTY, a picklock; to _unbetty_, or _betty_ a lock, is to open or re-lock
it, by means of the _betty_, so as to avoid subsequent detection.

BILLIARD SLUM. _The mace_ is sometimes called _giving it to ’em on the
billiard slum_. _See_ MACE.

BISHOP. _See_ CHRISTEN.

BIT, money in general.

BIT-FAKER, a coiner. _See_ FAKE.

BIT-FAKING, coining base money.

BLACK DIAMONDS, coals.

BLEEDERS, spurs.

BLOODY-JEMMY, a sheep’s head.

BLOW THE GAFF, a person having any secret in his possession, or a
knowledge of any thing injurious to another, when at last induced from
revenge, or other motive, to tell it openly to the world and expose him
publicly, is then said to have _blown the gaff upon_ him.

BLOWEN, a prostitute; a woman who cohabits with a man without marriage.

BLUE-PIGEON, lead.

BLUE-PIGEON FLYING, the practice of stealing lead from houses, churches,
or other buildings, very prevalent in London and its vicinity.

BLUNT, money.

BOB, or BOBSTICK, a shilling.

BODY-SLANGS. _See_ SLANGS.

BODY-SNATCHER, a stealer of dead bodies from churchyards; which are sold
to the surgeons and students in anatomy.

BOLT, to run away from or leave any place suddenly, is called _bolting_,
or _making a bolt_: a thief observing an alarm while attempting a
robbery, will exclaim to his accomplice, _Bolt_, there’s _a down_. A
sudden escape of one or more prisoners from a place of confinement is
termed _a bolt_.

BOLT-IN-TUN, a term founded on the cant word _bolt_, and merely a
fanciful variation, very common among _flash_ persons, there being
in London a famous inn so called; it is customary when a man has run
away from his lodgings, broke out of a jail, or made any other sudden
movement, to say, The _Bolt-in-tun_ is _concerned_; or, He’s gone to the
_Bolt-in-tun_; instead of simply saying, He has _bolted_, _&c._ _See_
BOLT.

BONED, taken in custody, apprehended; Tell us how you was _boned_,
signifies, tell us the story of your apprehension; a common request among
fellow-prisoners in a jail, _&c._, which is readily complied with in
general; and the various circumstances therein related afford present
amusement, and also useful hints for regulating their future operations,
so as to avoid the like misfortune.

BONNET, a concealment, pretext, or pretence; an ostensible manner of
accounting for what you really mean to conceal; as a man who actually
lives by depredation, will still outwardly follow some honest employment,
as a clerk, porter, newsman, _&c._ By this system of policy, he is said
to have a good _bonnet_ if he happens to get _boned_; and, in a doubtful
case, is commonly discharged on the score of having a good character. To
_bonnet for_ a person, is to corroborate any assertion he has made, or to
relate facts in the most favourable light, in order to extricate him from
a dilemma, or to further any object he has in view.

BOUNCE, to bully, threaten, talk loud, or affect great consequence; to
_bounce_ a person out of any thing, is to use threatening or high words,
in order to intimidate him, and attain the object you are intent upon;
or to obtain goods of a tradesman, by assuming the appearance of great
respectability and importance, so as to remove any suspicion he might at
first entertain. A thief, detected in the commission of a robbery, has
been known by this sort of finesse, aided by a genteel appearance and
polite manners, to persuade his accusers of his innocence, and not only
to get off with a good grace, but induce them to apologize for their
supposed mistake, and the affront put upon him. This masterstroke of
effrontery is called _giving it to ’em upon the bounce_.

BOUNCE, a person well or fashionably drest, is said to be a _rank bounce_.

BOWLED OUT, a man who has followed the profession of thieving for some
time, when he is ultimately taken, tried, and convicted, is said to be
_bowled out_ at last. To _bowl_ a person _out_, in a general sense, means
to detect him in the commission of any fraud or peculation, which he has
hitherto practised without discovery.

BRACE UP, to dispose of stolen goods by pledging them for the utmost you
can get at a pawnbroker’s, is termed _bracing_ them _up_.

BRADS, halfpence; also, money in general.

BREAKING UP OF THE SPELL, the nightly termination of performance at the
Theatres Royal, which is regularly attended by pickpockets of the lower
order, who exercise their vocation about the doors and avenues leading
thereto, until the house is emptied and the crowd dispersed.

BREECH’D, flush of money.

BRIDGE, to _bridge_ a person, or _throw_ him _over the bridge_, is, in a
general sense, to deceive him by betraying the confidence he has reposed
in you, and instead of serving him faithfully, to involve him in ruin
or disgrace; or, three men being concerned alike in any transaction,
two of them will form a collusion to _bridge_ the third, and engross to
themselves all the advantage which may eventually accrue. Two persons
having been engaged in a long and doubtful contest or rivalship, he, who
by superior art or perseverance gains the point, is said to have _thrown_
his opponent _over the bridge_. Among gamblers, it means deceiving the
person who had back’d you, by wilfully losing the game; the money so lost
by him being shared between yourself and your confederates who had laid
against you. In playing three-handed games, two of the party will play
into each other’s hands, so that the third must inevitably be _thrown
over the bridge_, commonly called, _two poll one_. _See_ PLAY ACROSS.

BROADS, cards; a person expert at which is said to be a good
_broad-player_.

BROOMSTICKS. _See_ QUEER-BAIL.

BROWNS and WHISTLERS, bad halfpence and farthings; (a term used by
coiners.)

BUB, a low expression signifying drink.

BUCKET. To _bucket_ a person is synonymous with _putting_ him _in the
well_. _See_ WELL. Such treatment is said to be _a bucketting concern_.

BUFF. To _buff to_ a person or thing, is to swear to the identity of
them; swearing very positively to any circumstance, is called _buffing it
home_.

BUFFER, a dog.

BUG, or BUG OVER. To give, deliver, or hand over; as, He _bug’d_ me a
_quid_, he gave me a guinea; _bug over the rag_, hand over the money.

BULL, a crown, or five shillings.

BULL-DOG, a sugar-loaf.

BULL-HANKERS, men who delight in the sport of _bull-hanking_; that is,
bull-baiting, or bullock-hunting, _games_ which afford much amusement,
and at the same time frequent opportunities of depredation, in the
confusion and alarm excited by the enraged animal.

BUM-CHARTER, a name given to bread steeped in hot water, by the first
unfortunate inhabitants of the _English Bastile_, where this miserable
fare was their daily breakfast, each man receiving with his scanty
portion of bread, a quart of boil’d water from the cook’s coppers!

BUM-TRAP, a sheriff’s officer or his follower.

BUNCE, money.

BURICK, a prostitute, or common woman.

BUSH’D, poor; without money.

BUSHY-PARK, a man who is poor is said to be _at Bushy park_, or _in the
park_.

BUSTLE, a cant term for money.

BUSTLE, any object effected very suddenly, or in a hurry, is said to
be _done upon the bustle_. To _give it to_ a man _upon the bustle_, is
to obtain any point, as borrowing money, _&c._, by some sudden story or
pretence, and affecting great haste, so that he is taken by surprise, and
becomes duped before he has time to consider of the matter.

BUZ, to _buz_ a person is to pick his pocket. _The buz_ is the _game_ of
picking pockets in general.

BUZ-COVE, or BUZ-GLOAK, a pickpocket; a person who is clever at this
practice, is said to be _a good buz_.


C

CABIN, a house.

CADGE, to beg. _The cadge_ is the _game_ or profession of begging.

CADGE-GLOAK, a beggar.

CANT OF DOBBIN, a roll of riband.

CAP, synonymous with BONNET, which _see_.

CARDINAL, a lady’s cloak.

CARRY THE KEG, a man who is easily vexed or put out of humour by any joke
passed upon him, and cannot conceal his chagrin, is said to _carry the
keg_, or is compared to a _walking distiller_.

CASTOR, a hat.

CAT and KITTEN RIG, the petty _game_ of stealing pewter quart and pint
pots from public-houses.

CAZ, cheese; _As good as caz_, is a phrase signifying that any projected
fraud or robbery may be easily and certainly accomplished; any person
who is the object of such attempt, and is known to be an easy dupe, is
declared to be _as good as caz_, meaning that success is certain.

CHANDLER-KEN, a chandler’s shop.

CHANT, a person’s name, address, or designation; thus, a thief who
assumes a feigned name on his apprehension to avoid being known, or a
swindler who gives a false address to a tradesman, is said to _tip them a
queer chant_.

CHANT, a cipher, initials, or mark of any kind, on a piece of plate,
linen, or other article; any thing so marked is said to be _chanted_.

CHANT, an advertisement in a newspaper or hand-bill; also a paragraph
in the newspaper describing any robbery or other recent event; any lost
or stolen property, for the recovery of which, or a thief, _&c._, for
whose apprehension a reward is held out by advertisement, are said to be
_chanted_.

CHARLEY, a watchman.

CHARLEY-KEN, a watch-box.

CHATS, lice.

CHATTY, lousy.

CHAUNT, a song; to _chaunt_ is to sing; to _throw off a rum chaunt_, is
to sing a good song.

CHEESE IT. The same as _Stow it_.

CHEESE THAT. _See_ STOW THAT.

CHINA STREET, a cant name for Bow Street, Covent Garden.

CHIV, a knife; to _chiv_ a person is to stab or cut him with a knife.

CHRISTEN, obliterating the name and number on the movement of a stolen
watch; or the crest, cipher, _&c._, on articles of plate, and getting
others engraved, so as to prevent their being identified, is termed
having them _bishop’d_ or _christen’d_.

CHUM, a fellow prisoner in a jail, hulk, _&c._; so there are _new chums_
and _old chums_, as they happen to have been a short or a long time in
confinement.

CHURY, a knife.

CLEANED OUT, said of a gambler who has lost his last stake at play;
also, of a _flat_ who has been stript of all his money by a coalition of
_sharps_.

CLOUT, a handkerchief of any kind.

CLOUTING, the practice of picking pockets exclusively of handkerchiefs.

CLY, a pocket.

CLY-FAKER, a pickpocket.

COACH-WHEEL, a dollar or crown-piece.

COME. A thief observing any article in a shop, or other situation, which
he conceives may be easily purloined, will say to his accomplice, I think
there is so and so _to come_.

COME IT, to divulge a secret; to tell any thing of one party to another;
they say of a thief who has turned evidence against his accomplices, that
he is _coming_ all he knows, or that he _comes it as strong as a horse_.

COME TO THE HEATH, a phrase signifying to pay or give money, and
synonymous with _Tipping_, from which word it takes its rise, there being
a place called Tiptree Heath, I believe, in the County of Essex.

COME TO THE MARK, to abide strictly by any contract previously made; to
perform your part manfully in any exploit or enterprise you engage in; or
to offer me what I consider a fair price for any article in question.

CONCERNED. In using many cant words, the lovers of _flash_, by way
of variation, adopt this term, for an illustration of which, _see_
BOLT-IN-TUN, ALDERMAN LUSHINGTON, MR. PALMER, _&c._

CONK, the nose.

CONK, a thief who impeaches his accomplices; a spy; informer, or
tell-tale. _See_ NOSE, and WEAR IT.

COVE, the master of a house or shop, is called _the Cove_; on other
occasions, when joined to particular words, as a _cross-cove_, a
_flash-cove_, a _leary-cove_, _&c._, it simply implies a man of those
several descriptions; sometimes, in speaking of any third person, whose
name you are either ignorant of, or don’t wish to mention, the word
_cove_ is adopted by way of emphasis, as may be seen under the word AWAKE.

COVER, to stand in such a situation as to obscure your _Pall_, who is
committing a robbery, from the view of by-standers or persons passing,
is called _covering_ him. Any body whose dress or stature renders him
particularly eligible for this purpose, is said to be _a good cover_.

COVESS, the mistress of a house or shop, and used on other occasions, in
the same manner as _Cove_, when applied to a man.

CRAB, to prevent the perfection or execution of any intended matter
or business, by saying any thing offensive or unpleasant, is called
_crabbing it_, or _throwing a crab_; to _crab_ a person, is to use such
offensive language or behaviour as will highly displease, or put him in
an ill humour.

CRAB’D, affronted; out of humour; sometimes called, being _in
Crab-street_.

CRABSHELLS, shoes.

CRACK, to break open; _the crack_ is the _game_ of house-breaking; _a
crack_ is a breaking any house or building for the purpose of plunder.

CRACKSMAN, a house-breaker.

CRACK A WHID, to speak or utter: as, he _crack’d_ some _queer whids_, he
dropt some bad or ugly expressions: _crack a whid_ for me, intercede, or
put in a word for me.

CRACKER, a small loaf, served to prisoners in jails, for their daily
subsistence.

CRAP, the gallows.

CRAP’D, hanged.

CRIB, a house, sometimes applied to shops, as, a _thimble-crib_, a
watch-maker’s shop; a _stocking-crib_, a hosier’s, _&c._

CROAK, to die.

CROOK, a sixpence.

CROSS, illegal or dishonest practices in general are called _the cross_,
in opposition to _the square_. _See_ SQUARE. Any article which has been
irregularly obtained, is said to have been _got upon the cross_, and is
emphatically termed _a cross article_.

CROSS-COVE, or CROSS-MOLLISHER, a man or woman who lives _upon the cross_.

CROSS-CRIB, a house inhabited, or kept by _family_ people. _See_
SQUARE-CRIB.

CROSS-FAM, to _cross-fam_ a person, is to pick his pocket, by crossing
your arms in a particular position.

CUE. _See_ LETTER Q.

CUT THE LINE. _See_ LINE.

CUT THE STRING. _See_ STRING.

CUT THE YARN. _See_ YARN.

CUTTING-GLOAK, a man famous for drawing a knife, and cutting any person
he quarrels with.


D

DAB, a bed.

DAB IT UP, to _dab it up_ with a woman, is to agree to cohabit with her.

DANCERS, stairs.

DANNA, human, or other excrement.

DANNA-DRAG, commonly pronounced _dunnick-drag_. _See_ KNAP A JACOB, _&c._

DARBIES, fetters.

DARKY, night.

DARKY, a dark lanthorn.

DEATH-HUNTER, an undertaker.

DICKY, or DICK IN THE GREEN, very bad or paltry; any thing of an inferior
quality, is said to be _a dicky concern_.

DIMMOCK, money.

DING, to throw, or throw away; particularly any article you have stolen,
either because it is worthless, or that there is danger of immediate
apprehension. To _ding_ a person, is to drop his acquaintance totally;
also to quit his company, or leave him for the time present; to _ding_ to
your _pall_, is to convey to him, privately, the property you have just
stolen; and he who receives it is said to _take ding_, or to _knap the
ding_.

DINGABLE, any thing considered worthless, or which you can well spare,
having no further occasion for it, is declared to be _dingable_. This
phrase is often applied by _sharps_ to a _flat_ whom they have _cleaned
out_; and by abandoned women to a keeper, who having spent his all upon
them, must be discarded, or _ding’d_ as soon as possible.

DISPATCHES, false dice used by gamblers, so contrived as always to throw
a nick.

DO, a term used by _smashers_; _to do a queer half-quid_, or _a queer
screen_, is to utter a counterfeit half-guinea, or a forged bank-note.

DO IT AWAY, to _fence_ or dispose of a stolen article beyond the reach of
probable detection.

DO IT UP, to accomplish any object you have in view; to obtain any thing
you were in quest of, is called _doing it up for_ such a thing; a person
who contrives by _nob-work_, or ingenuity, to live an easy life, and
appears to improve daily in circumstances, is said _to do it up in good
twig_.

DO THE TRICK, to accomplish any robbery, or other business successfully;
a thief who has been fortunate enough to acquire an independence, and
prudent enough to _tie it up_ in time, is said by his former associates
to have _done the trick_; on the other hand, a man who has imprudently
involved himself in some great misfortune, from which there is little
hope of his extrication is declared by his friends, with an air of
commiseration, to have _done the trick_ for himself; that is, his ruin or
downfall is nearly certain.

DOBBIN, riband. _See_ CANT.

DOLLOP, _a dollop_ is a large quantity of any thing; _the whole dollop_
means the total quantity.

DONE, convicted; as, he was _done_ for _a crack_, he was convicted of
house-breaking.

DORSE, a lodging; to _dorse_ with a woman, signifies to sleep with her.

DOUBLE, to _double_ a person, or _tip_ him _the Dublin packet_, signifies
either to run away from him openly, and elude his attempts to overtake
you, or to give him the slip in the streets, or elsewhere, unperceived,
commonly done to escape from an officer who has you in custody, or to
_turn up_ a _flat_ of any kind, whom you have a wish to get rid of.

DOUBLE-SLANGS, double-irons.

DOWN, sometimes synonymous with _awake_, as, when the party you are
about to rob, sees or suspects your intention, it is then said that
_the cove is down_. _A down_ is a suspicion, alarm, or discovery, which
taking place, obliges yourself and _palls_ to give up or desist from the
business or depredation you were engaged in; to _put a down upon_ a man,
is to give information of any robbery or fraud he is about to perpetrate,
so as to cause his failure or detection; to _drop down to_ a person is
to discover or be aware of his character or designs; to _put_ a person
_down to_ any thing, is to apprize him of, elucidate, or explain it to
him; to _put_ a _swell down_, signifies to alarm or put a gentleman on
his guard, when in the attempt to pick his pocket, you fail to effect it
at once, and by having touched him a little too roughly, you cause him to
suspect your design, and to use precautions accordingly; or perhaps, in
the act of _sounding_ him, by being too precipitate or incautious, his
suspicions may have been excited, and it is then said that you have _put_
him _down_. _put_ him _fly_, or _spoiled_ him. _See_ SPOIL IT. To _drop
down upon yourself_, is to become melancholy, or feel symptoms of remorse
or compunction, on being committed to jail, cast for death, _&c._ To sink
under misfortunes of any kind. A man who gives way to this weakness, is
said to be _down upon himself_.

DOWN AS A HAMMER; DOWN AS A TRIPPET. These are merely emphatical phrases,
used _out of flash_, to signify being _down_, _leary_, _fly_, or _awake
to_ any matter, meaning, or design.

DRAG, a cart. _The drag_, is the _game_ of robbing carts, waggons, or
carriages, either in town or country, of trunks, bale-goods, or any other
property. _Done_ for _a drag_, signifies convicted for a robbery of the
before-mentioned nature.

DRAG-COVE, the driver of a cart.

DRAGSMAN, a thief who follows the _game_ of _dragging_.

DRAKED, ducked; a discipline sometimes inflicted on pickpockets at fairs,
races, _&c._

DRAW, to _draw_ a person, is to pick his pocket, and the act of so
stealing a pocket-book, or handkerchief, is called _drawing_ a _reader_,
or _clout_. To obtain money or goods of a person by a false or plausible
story, is called _drawing_ him _of_ so and so. To _draw_ a _kid_, is to
obtain his _swag_ from him. _See_ KID-RIG.

DRIZ, lace, as sold on cards by the haberdashers, _&c._

DROP, the _game_ of ring-dropping is called _the drop_.

DROP, to give or present a person with money, as, he _dropp’d_ me a
_quid_, he gave me a guinea. A _kid_ who delivers his bundle to a sharper
without hesitation, or a shopkeeper who is easily duped of his goods by
means of a forged order or false pretence, is said to _drop the swag in
good twig_, meaning, to part with it freely.

DROP A WHID, to let fall a word, either inadvertently or designedly.

DROP-COVE, a _sharp_ who practises the _game_ of ring-dropping.

DROP DOWN. _See_ DOWN.

DRUMMOND, any scheme or project considered to be infallible, or any event
which is deemed inevitably certain, is declared to be _a Drummond_;
meaning, it is as sure as the credit of that respectable banking-house,
Drummond and Co.

DUB, a key.

DUB AT A KNAPPING-JIGGER, a collector of tolls at a turnpike-gate.

DUB-COVE, or DUBSMAN, a turnkey.

DUBLIN-PACKET. _See_ DOUBLE.

DUB UP, to lock up or secure any thing or place; also to button one’s
pocket, coat, _&c._

DUCE. Twopence is called _a duce_.

DUDS, women’s apparel in general.

DUES. This term is sometimes used to express money, where any certain
sum or payment is spoken of; a man asking for money due to him for any
service done, or a _blowen_ requiring her previous compliment from a
_family-man_, would say, Come, _tip_ us _the dues_. So a thief, requiring
his share of booty from his _palls_, will desire them to _bring the dues
to light_.

DUES. This word is often introduced by the lovers of _flash_ on many
occasions, but merely _out of fancy_, and can only be understood from
the context of their discourse; like many other cant terms, it is not
easily explained on paper: for example, speaking of a man likely to go
to jail, one will say, there will be _quodding dues concerned_, of a
man likely to be executed; there will be _topping dues_, if any thing
is alluded to that will require a fee or bribe, there must be _tipping
dues_, or _palming dues concerned_, _&c._

DUMMY, a pocket-book; a silly half-witted person.

DUMMY-HUNTERS, thieves who confine themselves to the practice of
stealing gentlemen’s pocket-books, and think, or profess to think, it
paltry to touch a _clout_, or other insignificant article; this class of
depredators traverse the principal streets of London, during the busy
hours, and sometimes meet with valuable prizes.

DUNNICK, or DANNA-DRAG. _See_ KNAP A JACOB.


F

FADGE, a farthing.

FAKE, a word so variously used, that I can only illustrate it by a few
examples. To _fake_ any person or place, may signify to rob them; to
_fake_ a person, may also imply to shoot, wound, or cut; to _fake_ a
man _out and out_, is to kill him; a man who inflicts wounds upon, or
otherwise disfigures, himself, for any sinister purpose, is said to have
_faked himself_; if a man’s shoe happens to pinch, or gall his foot, from
its being over-tight, he will complain that his shoe _fakes_ his foot
sadly; it also describes the doing any act, or the fabricating any thing,
as, to _fake_ your _slangs_, is to cut your irons in order to escape from
custody; to _fake_ your _pin_, is to create a sore leg, or to cut it,
as if accidentally, with an axe, _&c._, in hopes to obtain a discharge
from the army or navy, to get into the doctor’s list, _&c._; to _fake_ a
_screeve_, is to write any letter, or other paper; to _fake_ a _screw_,
is to shape out a skeleton or false key, for the purpose of _screwing_
a particular place; to _fake_ a _cly_, is to pick a pocket; _&c._ _&c._
_&c._

FAKE AWAY, THERE’S NO DOWN, an intimation from a thief to his _pall_,
during the commission of a robbery, or other act, meaning, go on with
your operations, there is no sign of any alarm or detection.

FAKEMAN-CHARLEY; FAKEMENT. As _to fake_ signifies to do any act, or make
any thing, so _the fakement_ means the act or thing alluded to, and on
which your discourse turns; consequently, any stranger unacquainted with
your subject will not comprehend what is meant by _the fakement_; for
instance, having recently been concerned with another in some robbery,
and immediately separated, the latter taking the booty with him, on your
next meeting you will inquire, what he has done with the _fakement_?
meaning the article stolen, whether it was a pocket-book, piece of linen,
or what not. Speaking of any stolen property which has a private mark,
one will say, there is a _fakeman-charley_ on it; a forgery which is
well executed, is said to be a _prime fakement_; in a word, any thing is
liable to be termed a _fakement_, or a _fakeman-charley_, provided the
person you address knows to what you allude.

FAM, the hand.

FAM, to feel or handle.

FAMILY, thieves, sharpers and all others who get their living _upon the
cross_, are comprehended under the title of “_The Family_.”

FAMILY-MAN, or WOMAN, any person known or recognised as belonging to _the
family_; all such are termed _family people_.

FANCY, any article universally admired for its beauty, or which the
owner sets particular store by, is termed a _fancy article_; as, a
_fancy clout_, is a favourite handkerchief, _&c._; so a woman who is the
particular favourite of any man, is termed his _fancy woman_, and _vice
versâ_.

FAWNEY, a finger-ring.

FAWNIED, or FAWNEY-FAM’D, having one or more rings on the finger.

FEEDER, a spoon.

FENCE, a receiver of stolen goods; to _fence_ any property, is to sell it
to a receiver or other person.

FIB, a stick. To _fib_ is to beat with a stick; also to box.

FIBBING-GLOAK, a pugilist.

FIBBING-MATCH, a boxing match.

FILE, a person who has had a long course of experience in the arts of
fraud, so as to have become an adept, is termed _an old file upon the
town_; so it is usual to say of a man who is extremely cunning, and not
to be over-reached, that he is a _deep file_. _File_, in the old version
of cant, signified a pickpocket, but the term is now obsolete.

FINGER-SMITH, a midwife.

FI’PENNY, a clasp-knife.

FLASH, the cant language used by _the family_. To speak _good flash_ is
to be well versed in cant terms.

FLASH, a person who affects any peculiar habit, as swearing, dressing in
a particular manner, taking snuff, _&c._, merely to be taken notice of,
is said to do it _out of flash_.

FLASH, to be _flash_ to any matter or meaning, is to understand or
comprehend it, and is synonymous with being _fly_, _down_, or _awake_;
to _put_ a person _flash to_ any thing, is to put him on his guard, to
explain or inform him of what he was before unacquainted with.

FLASH, to shew or expose any thing; as I _flash’d_ him a _bean_, I shewed
him a guinea. Don’t _flash_ your _sticks_, don’t expose your pistols,
_&c._

FLASH-COVE, or COVESS, the landlord or landlady of a _flash-ken_.

FLASH-CRIB, FLASH-KEN, or FLASH-PANNY, a public-house resorted to chiefly
by _family people_, the master of which is commonly an old _prig_, and
not unfrequently an _old-lag_.

FLASH-MAN, a favourite or _fancy-man_; but this term is generally applied
to those dissolute characters upon the town, who subsist upon the
liberality of unfortunate women; and who, in return, are generally at
hand during their nocturnal perambulations, to protect them should any
brawl occur, or should they be detected in robbing those whom they have
_picked up_.

FLASH-MOLLISHER, a _family_-woman.

FLASH-SONG, a song interlarded with _flash_ words, generally relating to
the exploits of the _prigging_ fraternity in their various branches of
depredation.

FLESH-BAG, a shirt.

FLAT. In a general sense, any honest man, or _square cove_, in opposition
to a _sharp_ or _cross-cove_; when used particularly, means the person
whom you have a design to rob or defraud, who is termed the _flat_, or
the _flatty-gory_. A man who does any foolish or imprudent act, is called
_a flat_; any person who is found an easy dupe to the designs of _the
family_, is said to be a _prime flat_. _It’s a good flat that’s never
down_, is a proverb among _flash_ people; meaning, that though a man may
be repeatedly duped or taken in, he must in the end have his eyes opened
to his folly.

FLAT-MOVE. Any attempt or project that miscarries, or any act of folly or
mismanagement in human affairs is said to be a _flat move_.

FLATS, a cant name for playing-cards.

FLIP, to shoot.

FLOOR, to knock down any one, either for the purpose of robbery, or to
effect your escape, is termed _flooring him_.

FLOOR’D, a person who is so drunk, as to be incapable of standing, is
said to be _floor’d_.

FLUE-FAKER, a chimney-sweeper.

FLY, vigilant; suspicious; cunning; not easily robbed or duped; a
shopkeeper or person of this description, is called a _fly cove_, or a
_leary cove_; on other occasions _fly_ is synonymous with _flash_ or
_leary_, as, I’m _fly_ to you, I was _put flash to_ him, _&c._

FLY THE MAGS, to gamble, by tossing up halfpence.

FOGLE, a silk-handkerchief.

FORKS, the two fore-fingers of the hand; to _put your forks down_, is to
pick a pocket.

FOSS, or PHOS, a phosphorus bottle used by _cracksmen_ to obtain a light.

FRISK, to search; to _frisk a cly_, is to empty a pocket of its contents;
to stand _frisk_, is to stand search.

FRISK, fun or mirth of any kind.


G

GAFF, to gamble with cards, dice, _&c._, or to toss up.

GAFF, a country fair; also a meeting of gamblers for the purpose of play;
any public place of amusement is liable to be called _the gaff_, when
spoken of in _flash_ company who know to what it alludes.

GALANEY, a fowl.

GALLOOT, a soldier.

GAME, every particular branch of depredation practised by _the family_,
is called a _game_; as, what _game_ do you go upon? One species of
robbery or fraud is said to be a good _game_, another a _queer game_,
_&c._

GAMMON, flattery; deceit; pretence; plausible language; any assertion
which is not strictly true, or professions believed to be insincere, as,
I believe you’re _gammoning_, or, that’s all _gammon_, meaning, you are
no doubt jesting with me, or, that’s all a farce. To _gammon_ a person,
is to amuse him with false assurances, to praise, or flatter him, in
order to obtain some particular end; to _gammon_ a man _to_ any act, is
to persuade him to it by artful language, or pretence; to _gammon_ a
shopkeeper, _&c._, is to engage his attention to your discourse, while
your accomplice is executing some preconcerted plan of depredation upon
his property; a thief detected in a house which he has entered, _upon the
sneak_, for the purpose of robbing it, will endeavour by some _gammoning_
story to account for his intrusion, and to get off with a good grace;
a man who is, ready at invention, and has always a flow of plausible
language on these occasions, is said to be _prime gammoner_; to _gammon
lushy_ or _queer_, is to pretend drunkenness, or sickness, for some
private end.

GAMMON THE TWELVE, a man who has been tried by a criminal court, and by
a plausible defence, has induced the jury to acquit him, or to banish
the capital part of the charge, and so save his life, is said, by his
associates to have _gammoned the twelve in prime twig_, alluding to the
number of jurymen.

GAMS, the legs, to have _queer gams_, is to be bandy-legged, or otherwise
deformed.

GARNISH, a small sum of money exacted from a _new chum_ on his entering a
jail, by his fellow-prisoners, which affords them a treat of beer, gin,
_&c._

GARDEN, to _put_ a person _in the garden_, _in the hole_, _in the
bucket_, or _in the well_, are synonymous phrases, signifying to defraud
him of his due share of the booty by embezzling a part of the property,
or the money, it is _fenced_ for; this phrase also applies generally to
defrauding any one with whom you are confidentially connected of what is
justly his due.

GARRET, the fob-pocket.

GEORGY, a quartern-loaf.

GILL, a word used by way of variation, similar to _cove_, _gloak_, or
_gory_; but generally coupled to some other descriptive term, as a
_flash-gill_, a _toby-gill_, _&c._

GIVE IT TO, to rob or defraud any place or person, as, I _gave it to_ him
_for_ his _reader_, I robb’d him of his pocket-book. What _suit_ did you
_give it_ them _upon_? In what manner, or by what means, did you effect
your purpose? Also, to impose upon a person’s credulity by telling him
a string of falsehoods; or to take any unfair advantage of another’s
inadvertence or unsuspecting temper, on any occasion; in either case, the
party at last _dropping down_, that is, detecting your imposition, will
say, I believe you have been _giving it to_ me nicely all this while.

GLAZE, a glass-window.

GLIM, a candle, or other light.

GLIM-STICK, a candlestick.

GLOAK, synonymous with GILL, which _see_.

GNARL, to _gnarl upon_ a person, is the same as _splitting_ or _nosing
upon_ him; a man guilty of this treachery is called a _gnarling_
scoundrel, _&c._

GO-ALONGER, a simple easy person, who suffers himself to be made a tool
of, and is readily persuaded to any act or undertaking by his associates,
who inwardly laugh at his folly, and ridicule him behind his back.

GO OUT, to follow the profession of thieving; two or more persons who
usually rob in company, are said to _go out_ together.

GOOD, a place or person, which promises to be easily robbed, is said to
be _good_, as, that house is _good upon the crack_; this shop is _good
upon the star_; _the swell_ is _good for_ his _montra_; _&c._ A man
who declares himself good for any favour or thing, means, that he has
sufficient influence, or possesses the certain means to obtain it; _good
as bread_, or _good as cheese_, are merely emphatical phrases to the same
effect. _See_ CAZ.

GORY, a term synonymous with _cove_, _gill_, or _gloak_, and like them,
commonly used in the descriptive. _See_ FLAT and SWELL.

GRAB, to seize; apprehend; take in custody; to make a _grab_ at any
thing, is to snatch suddenly, as at a gentleman’s watch-chain, _&c._

GRAB’D, taken, apprehended.

GRAY, a halfpenny, or other coin, having two heads or two tails, and
fabricated for the use of gamblers, who, by such a deception, frequently
win large sums.

GROCERY, halfpence, or copper coin, in a collective sense.

GRUB, victuals of any kind; to _grub_ a person, is to diet him, or find
him in victuals; to _grub_ well, is to eat with an appetite.

GUN, a view; look; observation; or taking notice; as, there is a strong
_gun_ at us, means, we are strictly observed. To _gun_ anything, is to
look at or examine it.


H

HADDOCK, a purse; _a haddack stuff’d with beans_, is a jocular term for a
purse full of guineas!

HALF A BEAN, HALF A QUID, half-a-guinea.

HALF A BULL, half-a-crown.

HALF-FLASH AND HALF-FOOLISH, this character is applied sarcastically to a
person, who has a smattering of the cant language, and having associated
a little with _family_ people, pretends to a knowledge of _life_ which
he really does not possess, and by this conduct becomes an object of
ridicule among his acquaintance.

HAMMERISH, _down as a hammer_.

HANG IT ON, purposely to delay or protract the performance of any task or
service you have undertaken, by dallying, and making as slow a progress
as possible, either from natural indolence, or to answer some private
end of your own. To _hang it on with_ a woman, is to form a temporary
connexion with her; to cohabit or keep company with her without marriage.

HANK, a bull-bait, or bullock-hunt.

HANK, to have a person _at a good hank_, is to have made any contract
with him very advantageous to yourself; or to be able from some prior
cause to command or use him just as you please; to have the benefit of
his purse or other services, in fact, upon your own terms.

HANK, a spell or cessation from any work or duty, on the score of
indisposition, or some other pretence.

HIGH-TOBY, the _game_ of highway robbery, that is, exclusively on
horseback.

HIGH-TOBY-GLOAK, a highwayman.

HIS-NABS, him, or himself; a term used by way of emphasis, when speaking
of a third person.

HOBBLED, taken up, or in custody; to _hobble_ a _plant_, is to _spring_
it. _See_ PLANT.

HOG, a shilling; five, ten, or more shillings, are called five, ten, or
more _hog_.

HOIST, the _game_ of shop-lifting is called _the hoist_; a person expert
at this practice is said to be _a good hoist_.

HOLE. _See_ GARDEN.

HOPPER-DOCKERS, shoes.

HORNEY, a constable.

HOXTER, an inside coat-pocket.


I

IN IT, to let another partake of any benefit or acquisition you have
acquired by robbery or otherwise, is called _putting_ him _in it_: a
_family-man_ who is accidentally witness to a robbery, _&c._, effected by
one or more others, will say to the latter, Mind, I’m _in it_; which is
generally acceded to, being the established custom; but there seems more
of courtesy than right in this practice.

IN TOWN, flush of money; _breeched_.


J

JACOB, a ladder; a simple half-witted person.

JACK, a post-chaise.

JACK-BOY, a postillion.

JACKET, to _jacket_ a person, or _clap a jacket_ on him, is nearly
synonymous with _bridging_ him. _See_ BRIDGE. But this term is more
properly applied to removing a man by underhand and vile means from any
birth or situation he enjoys, commonly with a view to supplant him;
therefore, when a person, is supposed to have fallen a victim to such
infamous machinations, it is said to have been a _jacketting concern_.

JASEY, a wig.

JEMMY, or JAMES, an iron-crow.

JERRY, a fog or mist.

JERVIS, a coachman.

JERVIS’S UPPER BENJAMIN, a box, or coachman’s great coat.

JIGGER, a door.

JOB, any concerted robbery, which is to be executed at a certain time, is
spoken of by the parties as _the job_, or having _a job_ to do at such a
place; and in this case as regular preparations are made, and as great
debates held, as about any legal business undertaken by the industrious
part of the community.

JOGUE, a shilling; _five jogue_ is five shillings, and so on, to any
other number.

JOSKIN, a country-bumbkin.

JUDGE, a _family-man_, whose talents and experience have rendered him a
complete adept in his profession, and who acts with a systematic prudence
on all occasions, is allowed to be, and called by his friends, a fine
_judge_.

JUDGEMENT, prudence; economy in acting; abilities, (the result of long
experience,) for executing the most intricate and hazardous projects;
any thing accomplished in a masterly manner, is, therefore, said to have
been done with _judgement_; on concerting or planning any operations, one
party will say, I think it would be _judgement_ to do so and so, meaning
expedient to do it.

JUDY, a _blowen_; but sometimes used when speaking familiarly of any
woman.

JUGELOW, a dog.

JUMP, a window on the ground-floor.

JUMP, a _game_, or species of robbery effected by getting into a house
through any of the lower windows. To _jump_ a place, is to rob it upon
the _jump_. A man convicted for this offence, is said to be _done_ for _a
jump_.


K

KELP, a hat; to _kelp_ a person, is to move your hat to him.

KEMESA, a shirt.

KEN, a house; often joined to other descriptive terms, as, _flash-ken_, a
_bawdy-ken_, _&c._

KENT, a coloured pocket-handkerchief of cotton or linen.

KICK, a sixpence, when speaking of compound sums only, as, _three and a
kick_, is three and sixpence, _&c._

KICKSEYS, breeches; speaking of a purse, _&c._, taken from the breeches
pocket, they say, it was _got from the kickseys_, there being no cant
term for the breeches pocket. To _turn out_ a man’s _kickseys_, means
to pick the pockets of them, in which operation it is necessary to turn
those pockets inside out, in order to get at the contents.

KID, a child of either sex, but particularly applied to a boy who
commences thief at an early age; and when by his dexterity he has become
famous, he is called by his acquaintances _the kid_ so and so, mentioning
his sirname.

KIDDY, a thief of the lower order, who, when he is _breeched_, by a
course of successful depredation, dresses in the extreme of vulgar
gentility, and affects a knowingness in his air and conversation, which
renders him in reality an object of ridicule; such a one is pronounced by
his associates of the same class, a _flash-kiddy_, or a _rolling-kiddy_.
_My kiddy_ is a familiar term used by these gentry in addressing each
other.

KID-RIG, meeting a child in the streets who is going on some errand, and
by a false, but well fabricated story, obtaining any parcel or goods
it may be carrying; this _game_ is practised by two persons, who have
each their respective parts to play, and even porters and other grown
persons are sometimes defrauded of their load by this artifice. To _kid_
a person _out of_ any thing, is to obtain it from him by means of a
false pretence, as that you were sent by a third person, _&c._, such
impositions are all generally termed _the kid-rig_.

KINCHEN, a young lad.

KIRK, a church or chapel.

KNAP, to steal; take; receive; accept; according to the sense it is
used in; as, to _knap a clout_, is to steal a pocket-handkerchief; to
_knap the swag_ from your _pall_, is to take from him the property he
has just stolen, for the purpose of carrying it; to _knap seven or
fourteen pen’worth_, is to receive sentence of transportation for seven
or fourteen years; to _knap the glim_, is to catch the venereal disease;
in making a bargain, to _knap_ the sum offered you, is to accept it;
speaking of a woman supposed to be pregnant, it is common to say, I
believe _Mr. Knap_ is _concerned_, meaning that she has _knap’d_.

KNAPPING A JACOB FROM A DANNA-DRAG. This is a curious species of robbery,
or rather borrowing without leave, for the purpose of robbery; it
signifies taking away the short ladder from a nightman’s cart, while the
men are gone into a house, the privy of which they are employed emptying,
in order to effect an ascent to a one-pair-of-stairs window, to scale a
garden-wall, _&c._, after which the ladder, of course, is left to rejoin
its master as it.

KNIFE IT. _See_ CHEESE IT.

KNUCK, KNUCKLER, or KNUCKLING-COVE, a pickpocket, or person professed in
the _knuckling_ art.

KNUCKLE, to pick pockets, but chiefly applied to the more refined
branch of that art, namely, extracting notes, loose cash, _&c._, from
the waistcoat or breeches pockets, whereas _buzzing_ is used in a more
general sense. _See_ BUZ.


L

LAG, to transport for seven years or upwards.

LAG, a convict under sentence of transportation.

LAG, to make water. To _lag_ spirits, wine, _&c._, is to adulterate them
with water.

LAGGER, a sailor.

LAGGING-DUES, speaking of a person likely to be transported, they say
_lagging dues_ will be _concerned_.

LAGGING MATTER, any species of crime for which a person is liable on
conviction to be transported.

LAG SHIP, a transport chartered by Government for the conveyance of
convicts to New South Wales; also, a hulk, or floating prison, in which,
to the disgrace of humanity, many hundreds of these unhappy persons are
confined, and suffer every complication of human misery.

LAMPS, the eyes; to have _queer lamps_, is to have sore or weak eyes.

LARK, fun or sport of any kind, to create which is termed _knocking up a
lark_.

LAWN, a white cambric handkerchief.

LEARY, synonymous with _fly_.

LEARY-COVE. _See_ FLY.

LEATHER-LANE, any thing paltry, or of a bad quality, is called _a
Leather-lane concern_.

LETTER Q, the _mace_, or _billiard-slum_, is sometimes called _going upon
the Q_, or _the letter Q_, alluding to an instrument used in playing
billiards.

LETTER-RACKET, going about to respectable houses with a letter or
statement, detailing some case of extreme distress, as shipwreck,
sufferings by fire, _&c._; by which many benevolent, but credulous,
persons, are induced to relieve the fictitious wants of the impostors,
who are generally men, or women, of genteel address, and unfold a
plausible tale of affliction.

LEVANTING, or RUNNING A LEVANT, an expedient practised by broken
gamesters to retrieve themselves, and signifies to bet money at a race,
cock-match, _&c._, without a shilling in their pocket to answer the
event. The punishment for this conduct in a public cockpit is rather
curious; the offender is placed in a large basket, kept on purpose, which
is then hoisted up to the ceiling or roof of the building, and the party
is there kept suspended, and exposed to derision during the pleasure of
the company.

LIFE, by this term is meant the various cheats and deceptions practised
by the designing part of mankind; a person well versed in this kind of
knowledge, is said to be one that knows _life_; in other words, that
knows the world. This is what Goldsmith defines to be a knowledge of
human nature on the wrong side.

LIGHT, to inform of any robbery, _&c._, which has been some time executed
and concealed, is termed _bringing the affair to light_; to produce
any thing to view, or to give up any stolen property for the sake of a
reward, to quash a prosecution, is also called _bringing_ it _to light_.
A thief, urging his associates to a division of any booty they have
lately made, will desire them to _bring the swag to light_.

LILL, a pocket-book.

LINE, to _get_ a person _in a line_, or _in a string_, is to engage
them in a conversation, while your confederate is robbing their person
or premises; to banter or jest with a man by amusing him with false
assurances or professions, is also termed _stringing_ him, or _getting_
him _in tow_; to keep any body in suspense on any subject without coming
to a decision, is called _keeping_ him _in tow_, _in a string_, or _in a
tow-line_. To _cut the line_, or _the string_, is to put an end to the
suspense in which you have kept any one, by telling him the plain truth,
coming to a final decision, _&c._ A person, who has been telling another
a long story, until he is tired, or conceives his auditor has been all
the while secretly laughing at him, will say at last, I’ve just _dropped
down_, you’ve had me in a fine _string_, I think it’s time to _cut_ it.
On the other hand, the auditor, having the same opinion on his part,
would say, Come, I believe you want to _string_ me all night, I wish
you’d _cut it_; meaning, conclude the story at once.

LOB, a till, or money-drawer. To have _made a good lob_, is synonymous
with _making a good speak_.

LOCK-UP-CHOVEY, a covered cart, in which travelling hawkers convey their
goods about the country, and which is secured by a door, lock, and key.

LODGING-SLUM, the practice of hiring ready-furnished lodgings, and
stripping them of the plate, linen, and other valuables.

LOOK AT A PLACE, when a plan is laid for robbing a house, _&c._, _upon
the crack_, or _the screw_, the parties will go a short time before the
execution, to examine the premises, and make any necessary observations;
this is called _looking at the place_.

LOUR, money.

LUMBER, a room.

LUMBER, to _lumber_ any property, is to deposit it at a pawnbroker’s, or
elsewhere for present security; to retire to any house or private place,
for a short time, is called _lumbering yourself_. A man apprehended, and
sent to gaol, is said to be _lumbered_, to be _in lumber_, or to be _in
Lombard-street_.

LUSH, to drink; speaking of a person who is drunk, they say, _Alderman
Lushington is concerned_, or, he has been _voting for the Alderman_.

LUSH, beer or liquor of any kind.

LUSH-CRIB, or LUSH-KEN, a public-house, or gin-shop.

LUSH, or LUSHY, drunk, intoxicated.

LUSHY-COVE, a drunken man.


M

MACE, to _mace_ a shopkeeper, or _give it to_ him _upon the mace_, is
to obtain goods on credit, which you never mean to pay for; to run up
a score with the same intention, or to spunge upon your acquaintance,
by continually begging or borrowing from them, is termed _maceing_, or
_striking the mace_.

MACE-GLOAK, a man who lives _upon the mace_.

MAG, a halfpenny.

MANCHESTER, the tongue.

MANG, to speak or talk.

MAULEY, the hand.

MAX, gin or hollands.

MILESTONE, a country booby.

MILL, to fight. To _mill_ a person is to beat him.

MILL A GLAZE, to break a window.

MILL-DOLL, an obsolete name for Bridewell house of correction, in
Bridge-street, Blackfriars, London.

MILLING-COVE, a pugilist.

MITTS, gloves.

MITTENS, the hands.

MIZZLE, to quit or go away from any place or company; to elope, or run
away.

MOLLISHER, a woman.

MONKEY, a padlock.

MONKERY, the country parts of England are called _The Monkery_.

MONTRA, a watch.

MORNING-SNEAK, going out early to rob private houses or shops by slipping
in at the door unperceived, while the servant or shopman is employed in
cleaning the steps, windows, _&c._

MOTT, a _blowen_, or woman of the town.

MOUNT, to swear, or give evidence falsely for the sake of a gratuity. To
_mount for_ a person is also synonymous with _bonnetting for_ him.

MOUNTER, a man who lives by _mounting_, or perjury, who is always ready
for a guinea or two to swear whatever is proposed to him.

MOUTH, a foolish silly person; a man who does a very imprudent act, is
said to be _a rank mouth_.

MOVE, any action or operation in life; the secret spring by which any
project is conducted, as, There is _move_ in that business which you are
not _down to_. To be _flash to every move upon the board_, is to have a
general knowledge of the world, and all its numerous deceptions.

MR. KNAP. _See_ KNAP.

MR. NASH. _See_ NASH.

MR. PALMER. _See_ PALM.

MR. PULLEN. _See_ PULL or PULL UP.

MUFF, an epithet synonymous with _mouth_.

MUG, the face; a _queer mug_ is an ugly face.

MURPHY’s COUNTENANCE, a pig’s face.

MYNABS, me, myself.


N

NAIL, to _nail_ a person, is to over-reach, or take advantage of him in
the course of trade or traffic; also, to rob, or steal; as, I _nail’d_
him _for_ (or _of_) his _reader_, I robbed him of his pocket-book; I
_nail’d the swell’s montra in the push_, I picked the gentleman’s pocket
of his watch in the crowd, _&c._ A person of an over-reaching, imposing
disposition, is called a _nail_, a _dead nail_, a _nailing_ rascal, a
_rank needle_, or a _needle pointer_.

NANCY, the posteriors.

NAP the BIB, to cry; as, the _mollisher nap’d_ her _bib_, the woman fell
a crying.

NASH, to go away from, or quit, any place or company; speaking of a
person who is gone, they say, he is _nash’d_, or _Mr. Nash is concerned_.

NE-DASH, nothing.

NEEDLE, (_see_ NAIL) to _needle_ a person, is to haggle with him in
making a bargain, and, if possible, take advantage of him, though in the
most trifling article.

NEEDLE-POINTER. _See_ NAIL.

NEEDY-MIZZLER, a poor ragged object of either sex; a shabby-looking
person.

NIB, a gentleman, or person of the higher order. People who affect
gentility or consequence, without any real pretensions thereto, are from
hence vulgarly called _Half-nibs_ or _Half-swells_; and, indeed, persons
of low minds, who conceive money to be the only criterion of gentility,
are too apt to stigmatize with the before-mentioned epithets any man,
who, however well-bred and educated, may be reduced to a shabby external,
but still preserves a sense of decorum in his manners, and avoids
associating with the vagabonds among whom he may unfortunately be doomed
to exist.

NIBB’D, taken in custody.

NIBBLE, to pilfer trifling articles, not having spirit to touch any thing
of consequence.

NIBBLER, a pilferer or petty thief.

NIX, or NIX MY DOLL, nothing.

NOB IT, to act with such prudence and knowledge of the world, as to
prosper and become independent without any labour or bodily exertion;
this is termed _nobbing it_, or _fighting nob work_. To effect any
purpose, or obtain any thing, by means of good judgment and sagacity, is
called _nobbing it for_ such a thing.

NOB-PITCHERS, a general term for those sharpers who attend at fairs,
races, _&c._, to take in the _flats_ at prick in the garter, cups and
balls, and other similar artifices.

NO DOWN. _See_ FAKE AWAY, _&c._

NOSE, a thief who becomes an evidence against his accomplices; also,
a person who seeing one or more suspicious characters in the streets,
makes a point of watching them in order to frustrate any attempt they
may make, or to cause their apprehension; also, a spy or informer of any
description.

NOSE, to _nose_, is to pry into any person’s proceedings in an
impertinent manner. To _nose upon_ any one, is to tell of any thing he
has said or done with a view to injure him, or to benefit yourself.

NULLING-COVE, a pugilist.

NUT, to please a person by any little act of assiduity, by a present, or
by flattering words, is called _nutting_ him; as the present, _&c._, by
which you have gratified them, is termed a _nut_.

NUTS UPON IT, to be very much pleased or gratified with any object,
adventure, or overture; so a person who conceives a strong inclination
for another of the opposite sex, is said to be quite _nutty_, or _nuts
upon_ him or her.

NUTS UPON YOURSELF, a man who is much gratified with any bargain he
has made, narrow escape he has had, or other event in which he is
interested, will express his self-satisfaction or gladness by declaring
that he is, or was, quite _nuts upon himself_.


O

OFFICE, a hint, signal, or private intimation, from one person to
another; this is termed _officeing_ him, or _giving_ him _the office_; to
_take the office_, is to understand and profit by the hint given.

OLD LAG, a man or woman who has been transported, is so called on
returning home, by those who are acquainted with the secret. _See_ LAG.

OLIVER, the moon.

OLIVER IS IN TOWN, a phrase signifying that the nights are moonlight, and
consequently unfavourable to depredation.

OLIVER’S UP, the moon has risen.

OLIVER WHIDDLES, the moon shines.

ONE UPON YOUR TAW, a person who takes offence at the conduct of another,
or conceives himself injured by the latter, will say, never mind, I’ll be
_one upon your taw_; or, I’ll be _a marble on your taw_; meaning, I’ll be
even with you some time.

ONION, a watch-seal, a _bunch of onions_, is several seals worn upon one
ring.

ORDER-RACKET, obtaining goods from a shopkeeper, by means of a forged
order or false pretence.

OUT-AND-OUT, quite; completely; effectually. _See_ SERVE and FAKE.

OUT-AND-OUTER, a person of a resolute determined spirit, who pursues his
object without regard to danger or difficulties; also an incorrigible
depredator, who will rob friend or stranger indiscriminately, being
possessed of neither honour nor principle.

OUT OF FLASH. _See_ FLASH.

OUT OF THE WAY, a thief who knows that he is sought after by the _traps_
on some information, and consequently goes out of town, or otherwise
conceals himself, is said by his _palls_ to be _out of the way for_ so
and so, naming the particular offence he stands charged with. _See_
WANTED.

OUT OF TWIG, to _put_ yourself _out of twig_, is to disguise your dress
and appearance, to avoid being recognised, on some particular account; a
man reduced by poverty to wear a shabby dress is said by his acquaintance
to be _out of twig_; to _put_ any article _out of twig_, as a stolen
coat, cloak, _&c._, is to alter it in such a way that it cannot be
identified.


P

PALL, a partner; companion; associate; or accomplice.

PALM, to bribe, or give money, for the attainment of any object or
indulgence; and it is then said that the party who receives it is
_palmed_, or that _Mr. Palmer is concerned_.

PALMING-RACKET, secreting money in the palm of the hand, a _game_ at
which some are very expert.

PANNY, a house.

PANNUM, bread.

PARK. _See_ BUSHY-PARK.

PATTER, to talk; as, _He patters good flash_, _&c._

PATTER’D, tried in a court of justice; a man who has undergone this
ordeal, is said to have _stood the patter_.

PEAR-MAKING, inlisting in various regiments, taking the bounty, and then
deserting.

PENSIONER, a mean-spirited fellow who lives with a woman of the town,
and suffers her to maintain him in idleness in the character of her
_fancy-man_.

PETER, a parcel or bundle, whether large or small; but most properly it
signifies a trunk or box.

PETER-HUNTING, traversing the streets or roads for the purpose of cutting
away trunks, _&c._, from travelling carriages; persons who follow this
_game_, are from thence called _peter-hunters_, whereas _the drag_ more
properly applies to robbing carts or waggons.

PETER-HUNTING-JEMMY, a small iron crow, particularly adapted for breaking
the patent chain, with which the luggage is of late years secured to
gentlemen’s carriages; and which, being of steel, case-hardened, is
fallaciously supposed to be proof against the attempts of thieves.

PETER-THAT, synonymous with _Stow-that_.

PICK-UP, to accost, or enter into conversation with any person, for the
purpose of executing some design upon his personal property; thus, among
gamblers, it is called _picking up a flat_, or _a mouth_: sharpers, who
are daily on the look-out for some unwary countryman or stranger, use
the same phrase; and among _drop-coves_, and others who act in concert,
this task is allotted to one of the gang, duly qualified, who is thence
termed _the picker-up_; and he having performed his part, his associates
proceed systematically in _cleaning out the flat_. To _pick up a cull_,
is a term used by _blowens_ in their vocation of street-walking. To
_pick_ a person _up_, in a general sense, is to impose upon, or take
advantage of him, in a contract or bargain.

PIGS, or GRUNTERS, police runners.

PINS, the legs.

PINCH, to purloin small articles of value in the shops of jewellers,
_&c._, while pretending to purchase or bespeak some trinket. This _game_
is called _the pinch_—I _pinch’d_ him _for_ a _fawney_, signifies I
purloined a ring from him; Did you _pinch_ any thing in that _crib_? did
you succeed in secreting any thing in that shop? This _game_ is a branch
of shop-lifting; but when _the hoist_ is spoken of, it commonly applies
to stealing articles of a larger, though less valuable, kind, as pieces
of muslin, or silk handkerchiefs, printed cotton, _&c._ _See_ HOIST.

PINCH-GLOAK, a man who _works upon the pinch_.

PIPES, boots.

PIT, the bosom pocket in a coat.

PIT-MAN, a pocket-book worn in the bosom-pocket.

PITCHER. Newgate in London is called by various names, as _the pitcher_,
_the stone pitcher_, _the start_, and _the stone jug_, according to the
humour of the speaker.

PLANT. To hide, or conceal any person or thing, is termed _planting_
him, or it; and any thing hid is called, _the plant_, when alluded
to in conversation; such article is said to be _in plant_; the place
of concealment is sometimes called _the plant_, as, I know of a fine
_plant_; that is, a secure hiding-place. To _spring a plant_, is to find
any thing that has been concealed by another. To _rise the plant_, is
to take up and remove any thing that has been hid, whether by yourself
or another. A person’s money, or valuables, secreted about his house, or
person, is called his _plant_. To _plant upon_ a man, is to set somebody
to watch his motions; also to place any thing purposely in his way, that
he may steal it and be immediately detected.

PLAY ACROSS. What is commonly termed playing booty, that is, purposely
losing the game, or match, in order to take in the _flats_ who have
backed you, (_see_ BRIDGE) while the _sharps_ divide the spoil, in which
you have a share. This sort of treachery extends to boxing, racing, and
every other species of sport, on which bets are laid; sometimes a sham
match is made for the purpose of inducing strangers to bet, which is
decided in such a manner that the latter will inevitably lose. _Across_
signifies generally any collusion or unfair dealing between several
parties.

PLUMMY. Right; very good; as it should be; expressing your approbation of
any act, or event, you will say, _That’s plummy_, or _It’s all plummy_;
meaning it is all right.

POGUE. A bag, (probably a corruption of poke.)

POPS. Pistols; an obsolete term.

POST, or POST THE PONEY. To stake, or lay down the money, as on laying a
bet, or concluding a bargain.

POUNDABLE. Any event which is considered certain or inevitable, is
declared to be _poundable_, as the issue of a game, the success of a bet,
_&c._

POUND IT. To ensure or make a certainty of any thing; thus, a man will
say, I’ll _pound it_ to be so; taken, probably from the custom of laying,
or rather offering ten pounds to a crown at a cock-match, in which case,
if no person takes this extravagant odds, the battle is at an end. This
is termed pounding a cock.

PRAD. A horse.

PRADBACK. Horseback.

PRIG. A thief.

PRIG. To steal; to _go out a-prigging_, is to go a-thieving.

PRIME. In a general sense, synonymous with _plummy_; any thing very good
of its kind, is called _a prime article_. Any thing executed in a stylish
or masterly manner, is said to be done _in prime twig_. _See_ FAKEMENT,
and GAMMON THE TWELVE.

PULL. An important advantage possessed by one party over another; as
in gaming, you may by some slight, unknown to your adversary, or by a
knowledge of the cards, _&c._, have the odds of winning considerably on
your side; you are then said to have a great _pull_. To have the power
of injuring a person, by the knowledge of any thing erroneous in his
conduct, which leaves his character or personal safety at your mercy, is
also termed having _a pull upon him_, that is (to use a vulgar phrase)
that you have him under your thumb. A person speaking of any intricate
affair, or feat of ingenuity, which he cannot comprehend, will say, There
is some _pull_ at the bottom of it, that I’m not _fly to_.

PULL, or PULL UP, to accost; stop; apprehend; or take into custody; as
to pull up a _Jack_, is to stop a post-chaise on the highway. To _pull_
a man, or have him _pulled_, is to cause his apprehension for some
offence; and it is then said, that _Mr. Pullen is concerned_.

PULLED, PULLED UP, or IN PULL. Taken in custody; in confinement.

PUSH, a crowd or concourse of people, either in the streets, or at any
public place of amusement, _&c._, when any particular scene of crowding
is alluded to, they say, _the push_, as _the push_, at the _spell_ doors;
_the push_ at the _stooping-match_, _&c._

PUT DOWN. _See_ DOWN.

PUT FLASH. _See_ FLASH.

PUT FLY. _See_ FLY.

PUT UP, to suggest to another, the means of committing a depredation, or
effecting any other business, is termed, _putting_ him _up to_ it.

PUT UP AFFAIR, any preconcerted plan or scheme to effect a robbery,
_&c._, undertaken at the suggestion of another person, who possessing a
knowledge of the premises, is competent to advise the principal how best
to proceed.

PUTTER UP, the projector or planner of a _put-up affair_, as a servant
in a gentleman’s family, who proposes to a gang of housebreakers the
robbery of his master’s house, and informs them where the plate, _&c._,
is deposited, (instances of which are frequent in London) is termed the
_putter up_, and usually shares equally in the booty with the parties
executing, although the former may lie dormant, and take no part in the
actual commission of the fact.

PUZZLING-STICKS, the triangles to which culprits are tied up, for the
purpose of undergoing flagellation.


Q

Q. _See_ LETTER Q.

QUEER, bad; counterfeit; false; unwell in health.

QUEER, or QUEER-BIT, base money.

QUEER SCREENS, forged Bank-notes.

QUEER IT, to spoil it, which see.

QUEER-BAIL, Persons of no repute, hired to bail a prisoner in any
bailable case; these men are to be had in London for a trifling sum, and
are called _Broomsticks_.

QUID, a guinea.

QUOD, a gaol. To _quod_ a person is to send him to gaol. _In quod_, is in
gaol.

QUOD-COVE, the keeper of a gaol.

QUODDING-DUES. _See_ DUES.


R

RACKET, some particular kinds of fraud and robbery are so termed,
when called by their _flash_ titles, and others _Rig_; as, _the
Letter-racket_, _the Order-racket_; _the Kid-rig_; _the Cat and
Kitten-rig_, _&c._, but all these terms depend upon the fancy of the
speaker. In fact, any _game_ may be termed a _rig_, _racket_, _suit_,
_slum_, _&c._, by prefixing thereto the particular branch of depredation
or fraud in question, many examples of which occur in this work.

RAG, money.

RAG-GORGY, a rich or monied man, but generally used in conversation when
a particular gentleman, or person high in office, is hinted at; instead
of mentioning his name, they say, _the Rag-gorgy_, knowing themselves to
be understood by those they are addressing. _See_ COVE, and SWELL.

RAMP, to rob any person or place by open violence or suddenly snatching
at something and running off with it, as, I _ramp’d_ him of his _montra_;
why did you not _ramp_ his _castor_? _&c._ A man convicted of this
offence, is said to have been _done_ for a _ramp_. This audacious _game_,
is called by _prigs_, _the ramp_, and is nearly similar to the RUSH,
which see.

RANK, complete; absolute, downright, an emphatical manner of describing
persons or characters, as _a rank nose_, _a rank swell_, _&c._ _&c._

RATTLER, a coach.

READER, a pocket-book.

READER-HUNTERS. _See_ DUMMY-HUNTERS.

REGULARS, one’s due share of a booty, _&c._ on a division taking place.
Give me my _regulars_, that is, give me my dividend.

REIGN, the length or continuance of a man’s career in a system of
wickedness, which when he is ultimately _bowled out_, is said to have
been a long, or a short _reign_, according to its duration.

RESURRECTION-COVE, a stealer of dead bodies.

RIBBAND, money in general.

RIDGE, gold, whether in coin or any other shape, as a _ridge-montra_, a
gold watch; a _cly_-full of _ridge_, a pocket full of gold.

RIG. _See_ RACKET.

RINGING, or RINGING-IN, to _ring_ is to exchange; _ringing the changes_,
is a fraud practised by _smashers_, who when they receive good money in
change of a guinea, _&c._, _ring-in_ one or more pieces of base with
great dexterity, and then request the party to change them.

RINGING CASTORS, signifies frequenting churches and other public
assemblies, for the purpose of changing hats, by taking away a good, and
leaving a shabby one in its place; a petty _game_ now seldom practised.

RISE THE PLANT. _See_ PLANT.

ROCK’D, superannuated, forgetful, absent in mind; _old lags_ are commonly
said to be thus affected, probably caused by the sufferings they have
undergone.

ROLLERS, horse and foot patrole, who parade the roads round about London
during the night, for the prevention of robberies.

ROMANY, a gypsy; to _patter romany_, is to talk the gypsy _flash_.

ROOK, a small iron crow.

ROUGH-FAM, or ROUGH-FAMMY, the waistcoat pocket.

ROW IN THE BOAT, to go snacks, or have a share in the benefit arising
from any transaction to which you are privy. To let a person _row_ with
you, is to admit him to a share.

RUFFLES. Handcuffs.

RUGGINS’S, to go to bed, is called going to Ruggins’s.

RUM, good, in opposition to _queer_.

RUMBLE-TUMBLE, a stage-coach.

RUMP’D, flogged or scourged.

RUMPUS, a masquerade.

RUSH, _the rush_, is nearly synonymous with _the ramp_; but the latter
often applies to snatching at a single article, as a silk cloak, for
instance, from a milliner’s shop-door; whereas _a rush_ may signify a
forcible entry by several men into a detached dwelling-house for the
purpose of robbing its owners of their money, _&c._ A sudden and violent
effort to get into any place, or _vice versâ_ to effect your exit, as
from a place of confinement, _&c._, is called _rushing them_, or _giving
it to ’em upon the rush_.

RUSSIAN COFFEE-HOUSE, a name given by some punster of _the family_, to
the Brown Bear public-house in Bow-street, Covent-garden.


S

SACK, a pocket; to _sack_ any thing is to pocket it.

SALT-BOXES, the condemned cells in Newgate are so called.

SALT-BOX-CLY, the outside coat-pocket, with a flap.

SAND, moist sugar.

SAWNEY, bacon.

SCAMP, the _game_ of highway robbery is called _the scamp_. To _scamp_
a person is to rob him on the highway. _Done for a scamp_ signifies
convicted of a highway robbery.

SCAMP, or SCAMPSMAN, a highwayman.

SCHOOL, a party of persons met together for the purpose of gambling.

SCOT, a person of an irritable temper, who is easily put in a passion,
which is often done by the company he is with, to create fun; such a one
is declared to be a fine _scot_. This diversion is called _getting_ him
_out_, or _getting_ him _round the corner_, from these terms being used
by _bull-hankers_, with whom also a _scot_ is a bullock of a particular
breed, which affords superior diversion when hunted.

SCOTTISH, fiery, irritable, easily provoked.

SCOUT, a watchman.

SCOUT-KEN, a watch-house.

SCRAG’D, hang’d.

SCRAGGING-POST, the gallows.

SCREEN, a bank-note.

SCREEVE, a letter, or written paper.

SCREW, a skeleton or false key. To _screw_ a place is to enter it by
false keys; this _game_ is called _the screw_. Any robbery effected by
such means is termed _a screw_.

SCREWSMAN, a thief who _goes out a screwing_.

SCURF’D, taken in custody.

SEEDY, poor, ragged in appearance, shabby.

SELL, to _sell_ a man is to betray him, by giving information against
him, or otherwise to injure him clandestinely for the sake of interest,
nearly the same as _bridgeing_ him. (_See_ BRIDGE.) A man who falls a
victim to any treachery of this kind, is said to have been _sold like a
bullock in Smithfield_.

SERVE, to _serve_ a person, or place, is to rob them; as, I _serv’d_
him _for_ his _thimble_, I rob’d him of his watch; that _crib_ has been
_served_ before, that shop has been already robbed, _&c._ To serve a man,
also sometimes signifies to maim, wound, or do him some bodily hurt; and
to _serve_ him _out and out_, is to kill him.

SHAKE, to steal, or rob; as, I _shook_ a chest of _slop_, I stole a chest
of tea; I’ve been _shook_ of my _skin_, I have been robbed of my purse. A
thief, whose _pall_ has been into any place for the purpose of robbery,
will say on his coming out, Well, is it all right, have you _shook_?
meaning, did you succeed in getting any thing? When two persons rob in
company, it is generally the province, or part, of one to _shake_, (that
is, obtain _the swagg_), and the other to carry, (that is, bear it to a
place of safety).

SHALLOW, a hat.

SHAN, counterfeit money in general.

SHARP, a gambler, or person, professed in all the arts of play; a
cheat, or swindler; any _cross-cove_, in general, is called _a sharp_,
in opposition to _a flat_, or _square-cove_; but this is only in a
comparative sense in the course of conversation.

SHARPING, swindling and cheating in all their various forms, including
the arts of fraud at play.

SHIFTER, an alarm, or intimation, given by a thief to his _pall_,
signifying that there is _a down_, or that some one is approaching, and
that he had, therefore, better desist from what he is about.

SHINER, a looking-glass.

SHOOK, synonymous with _rock’d_.

SHOVE-UP, nothing.

SHUTTER-RACKET, the practice of robbing houses, or shops, by boring a
hole in the window shutter, and taking out a pane of glass.

SINGLE-HANDED, robbery by yourself, without a _pall_.

SIR SYDNEY, a clasp knife.

SKIN, a purse, or money bag.

SKIN, to strip a man of all his money at play, is termed _skinning_ him.

SLANG, a watch chain, a chain of any kind; also a warrant, license to
travel, or other official instrument.

SLANG, to defraud a person of any part of his due, is called _slanging_
him; also to cheat by false weights or measures, or other unfair means.

SLANG WEIGHTS, or MEASURES, unjust, or defective ones.

SLANGING-DUES, when a man suspects that he has been curtailed, or
cheated, of any portion of his just right, he will say, there has been
_slanging-dues concerned_.

SLANG’D, fettered.

SLANGS, fetters, or chains of any kind used about prisoners;
_body-slangs_ are body-irons used on some occasions.

SLAVEY, a servant of either sex.

SLIP, the slash pocket in the skirt of a coat behind.

SLOP, tea.

SLOP-FEEDER, a tea-spoon.

SLOUR, to lock, secure, or fasten; to _slour up_ is also to button up; as
one’s coat, pocket, _&c._

SLOUR’D, or SLOUR’D UP, locked, fastened, buttoned, _&c._

SLUM, a room.

SLUM. _See_ RACKET _and_ LODGING-SLUM.

SLY. Any business transacted, or intimation given, privately, or under
the rose, is said to be _done upon the sly_.

SMASHER, a man or woman who follows the _game_ of _smashing_.

SMASHING, uttering counterfeit money; _smashing_ of _queer screens_,
signifies uttering forged bank notes. To _smash_ a guinea, note, or other
money, is, in a common sense, to procure, or give, change for it.

SMISH, a shirt.

SMUT, a copper boiler, or furnace.

SNEAK. _The sneak_ is the practice of robbing houses or shops, by
slipping in unperceived, and taking whatever may lay most convenient;
this is commonly the first branch of thieving, in which young boys are
initiated, who, from their size and activity, appear well adapted for it.
To _sneak_ a place, is to rob it _upon the sneak_. A _sneak_ is a robbery
effected in the above manner. One or more prisoners having escaped from
their confinement by stealth, without using any violence, or alarming
their keepers, are said to have _sneak’d ’em_, or _given it to ’em upon
the sneak_. _See_ RUSH.

SNEAKSMAN, a man or boy _who goes upon the sneak_.

SNEEZER, or SNEEZING-COFER, a snuff-box.

SNITCH; to impeach, or betray your accomplices, is termed _snitching
upon_ them. A person who becomes king’s evidence on such an occasion, is
said to have turned _snitch_; an informer, or tale-bearer, in general, is
called a _snitch_, or a _snitching_ rascal, in which sense _snitching_ is
synonymous with _nosing_, or _coming it_.

SNIPES, scissors.

SNIV, an expression synonymous with _bender_, and used in the same manner.

SNOW, clean linen from the washerwoman’s hands, whether it be wet or dry,
is termed _snow_.

SNOOZE, to sleep; _a snooze_ sometimes means a lodging; as, Where can I
get a _snooze_ for this _darky_ instead of saying a bed.

SNUFFING, going into a shop on some pretence, watching an opportunity to
throw a handful of snuff in the eyes of the shopkeeper, and then running
off with any valuable article you can lay hands on; this is called
_snuffing_ him, or _giving it to him upon the snuff racket_.

SOLD. _See_ SELL.

SOUND, to _sound_ a person, means generally to draw from him, in an
artful manner, any particulars you want to be acquainted with; as, to
_sound_ a _kid_, porter, _&c._ is to pump out of him the purport of his
errand, the contents of his bundle, or load, _&c._, that your _pall_ may
know how to accost him, in order to _draw the swag_. _See_ DRAW _and_
KID-RIG. To _sound a cly_, is to touch a person’s pocket gently on the
outside, in order to ascertain the nature of its contents.

SPANGLE, a seven-shilling piece.

SPANK, to _spank a glaze_, is to break a pane of glass in a shop window,
and make a sudden snatch at some article of value within your reach,
having previously tied the shop-door with a strong cord on the outside,
so as to prevent the shopman from getting out, till you have had full
time to escape with your booty; to _spank_ a place, is to rob it _upon
the spank_; _a spank_ is a robbery effected by the above means.

SPEAK, committing any robbery, is called _making a speak_; and if it has
been productive, you are said to have _made a rum speak_.

SPEAK TO, to _speak to_ a person or place is to rob them, and to _speak
to_ any article, is to steal it; as, I _spoke to the cove for his
montra_; I robb’d the gentleman of his watch. I _spoke to_ that _crib
for_ all the _wedge_; I robb’d that house of all the plate. I _spoke to_
a chest of _slop_; I stole a chest of tea. A thief will say to his _pall_
who has been attempting any robbery, “Well, did you _speak_? or, have you
_spoke_?” meaning, did you get any thing?

SPELL, the play-house.

SPICE, _the spice_ is the _game_ of footpad robbery; describing an
exploit of this nature; a rogue will say, I _spiced_ a _swell of_ so
much, naming the booty obtained. _A spice_ is a footpad robbery.

SPICE GLOAK, a footpad robber.

SPIN A YARN. _See_ YARN.

SPLIT, to _split upon_ a person, or _turn split_, is synonymous with
_nosing_, _snitching_, or _turning nose_. To _split_ signifies generally
to tell of any thing you hear, or see transacted.

SPOIL IT, to throw some obstacle in the way of any project or
undertaking, so as to cause its failure, is termed _spoiling it_. In
like manner, to prevent another person from succeeding in his object,
either by a wilful obstruction, or by some act of imprudence on your
part, subjects you to the charge of having _spoiled him_. Speaking of
some particular species of fraud or robbery, which after a long series
of success, is now become stale or impracticable from the public being
guarded against it, _the family_ will say, that _game_ is _spoiled_ at
last. So having attempted the robbery of any particular house or shop,
and by miscarrying caused such an alarm as to render a second attempt
dangerous or impolitic, they will say, that place is _spoil’d_, it is
useless to _try it on_ any more.

SPOKE TO, alluding to any person or place that has been already robbed,
they say, that place, or person, has been _spoke to_ before. A _family
man_ on discovering that he has been robbed, will exclaim, I have been
_spoke to_; and perhaps will add, _for_ such a thing, naming what he has
lost. _Spoke to upon the screw_, _crack_, _sneak_, _hoist_, _buz_, _&c._
_&c._, means robbed _upon_ either of those particular _suits_ or _games_.
Upon any great misfortune befalling a man, as being apprehended on a
very serious charge, receiving a wound supposed to be mortal, _&c._, his
friends will say, Poor fellow, I believe he’s _spoke to_, meaning it is
all over with him.

SPOONY, foolish, half-witted, nonsensical; a man who has been drinking
till he becomes disgusting by his very ridiculous behaviour, is said to
be _spoony_ drunk; and, from hence it is usual to call a very prating
shallow fellow, _a rank spoon_.

SPOUT, to pledge any property at a pawnbroker’s is termed _spouting_ it,
or _shoving_ it _up the spout_.

SPREAD, butter.

SPRING THE PLANT. _See_ PLANT.

SQUARE, all fair, upright, and honest practices, are called _the square_,
in opposition to _the cross_. Any thing you have bought, or acquired
honestly, is termed _a square article_; and any transaction which is
fairly and equitably conducted, is said to be _a square concern_. A
tradesman or other person who is considered by the world to be an honest
man, and who is unacquainted with _family people_, and their system of
operations, is by the latter emphatically styled _a square cove_, whereas
an old thief who has acquired an independence, and now confines himself
to _square_ practices, is still called by his old _palls_ a _flash cove_,
who has _tyed up prigging_. _See_ CROSS and FLAT. In making a bargain or
contract, any overture considered to be really fair and reasonable, is
declared to be _a square thing_, or to be _upon the square_. To be _upon
the square_ with any person, is to have mutually settled all accompts
between you both up to that moment. To threaten another that you will be
_upon the square with him_ some time, signifies that you’ll be even with
him for some supposed injury, _&c._

SQUARE-COVE. _See_ SQUARE.

SQUARE-CRIB, a respectable house, of good repute, whose inmates, their
mode of life and connexions, are all perfectly _on the square_. _See_
CROSS-CRIB.

SQUEEZE, the neck.

STAG, to _turn stag_ was formerly synonymous with _turning nose_, or
_snitching_, but the phrase is now exploded.

STAG, to _stag_ any object or person, is to look at, observe, or take
notice of them.

STAINES, a man who is in pecuniary distress is said to be _at Staines_,
or _at the Bush_, alluding to the Bush inn at that town. _See_ BUSH’D.

STAKE, a booty acquired by robbery, or a sum of money won at play, is
called _a stake_, and if considerable, _a prime stake_, or a _heavy
stake_. A person alluding to any thing difficult to be procured, or which
he obtains as a great favour, and is therefore comparatively invaluable,
would say, I consider it _a stake_ to get it at all; a valuable or
acceptable acquisition of any kind, is emphatically called _a stake_,
meaning a great prize.

STALL, a violent pressure in a crowd, made by pickpockets for the more
easily effecting their depredatory purposes; this is called _making a rum
stall in the push_.

STALL OFF, a term variously applied; generally it means a pretence,
excuse, or prevarication—as a person charged with any fault, entering
into some plausible story, to excuse himself, his hearers or accusers
would say, O yes, that’s a good _stall off_, or, Aye, aye, _stall it off_
that way if you can. To extricate a person from any dilemma, or save him
from disgrace, is called _stalling_ him _off_; as an accomplice of your’s
being detected in a robbery, _&c._, and about to be given up to justice,
you will step up as a stranger, interfere in his behalf, and either by
vouching for his innocence, recommending lenity, or some other artifice,
persuade his accusers to forego their intention, and let the prisoner
escape; you will then boast of having _stalled him off in prime twig_. To
avoid or escape any impending evil or punishment by means of artifice,
submission, bribe, or otherwise, is also called _stalling_ it _off_. A
man walking the streets, and passing a particular shop, or encountering a
certain person, which or whom he has reasons for wishing to avoid, will
say to any friend who may be with him, I wish you’d _stall_ me _off from_
that _crib_, (or _from_ that _cove_, as the case may be) meaning, walk in
such a way as to cover or obscure me from notice, until we are past the
shop or person in question.

STALL UP. To _stall_ a person up, (a term used by pickpockets,) is to
surround him in a crowd, or violent pressure, and even sometimes in the
open street, while walking along, and by violence force his arms up, and
keep them in that position while others of the gang rifle his pockets
at pleasure, _the cove_ being unable to help or defend himself; this is
what the newspapers denominate hustling, and is universally practised
at the doors of public theatres, at boxing matches, ship-launches, and
other places where the general anxiety of all ranks, either to push
forward, or to obtain a view of the scene before them, forms a pretext
for jostling, and every other advantage which the strength or numbers
of one party gives them over a weaker one, or a single person. It is
not unusual for the _buz-coves_, on particular occasions, to procure a
formidable squad of stout fellows of the lower class, who, though not
expert at _knuckling_, render essential service by violently pushing and
squeezing in the crowd, and, in the confusion excited by this conduct,
the unconcerned _prigs_ reap a plentiful harvest, and the _stallers up_
are gratified with such part of the gains acquired, as the liberality
of the _knuckling_ gentlemen may prompt them to bestow. This _coup de
guêrre_ is termed _making a regular stall_ at such a place, naming the
scene of their operations. _See_ STALL.

STAMPS, shoes.

STAND THE PATTER. _See_ PATTER’D.

STAR. _The star_ is a _game_ chiefly practised by young boys, often
under ten years of age, although the offence is capital. It consists of
cutting a pane of glass in a shop-window, by a peculiar operation called
_starring the glaze_, which is performed very effectually by a common
penknife; the depredators then take out such articles of value as lie
within reach of their arm, which if they are not interrupted, sometimes
includes half the contents of the window. A person convicted of this
offence is said to have been _done for a star_.

START. _See_ PITCHER.

STASH. To _stash_ any practice, habit, or proceeding, signifies to put
an end to, relinquish, or quash the same; thus, a thief determined to
leave off his vicious courses will declare that he means to _stash_ (or
_stow_) _prigging_. A man in custody for felony, will endeavour, by
offering money, or other means, to induce his prosecutor’s forbearance,
and compromise the matter, so as to obtain his liberation; this is called
_stashing the business_. To _stash_ drinking, card-playing, or any
other employment you may be engaged in, for the time present, signifies
to _stow_ it, _knife_ it, _cheese_ it, or _cut_ it, which are all
synonymous, that is, to desist or leave off. _See_ WANTED.

STASH IT. _See_ STOW IT, which has the same meaning.

STAUNCH, a resolute faithful associate, in whom one may place implicit
confidence, is said by his _palls_ to be a _staunch_ cove.

STEAMER, a tobacco-pipe.

STEVEN, money.

STICK, a pistol.

STICKS, household furniture.

STING, to rob or defraud a person or place is called _stinging_ them, as,
that _cove_ is too _fly_; he has been _stung_ before; meaning that man is
upon his guard; he has already been trick’d.

STINK. When any robbery of moment has been committed, which causes much
alarm, or of which much is said in the daily papers, the _family people_
will say, there is a great _stink_ about it. _See_ WANTED.

STONE-JUG; STONE-PITCHER. _See_ PITCHER.

STOOP, the pillory is called _the stoop_; to be _stoop’d_, is to be set
on the pillory.

STOOPING-MATCH, the exhibition of one or more persons on the pillory.
_See_ PUSH.

STOW, to _stow_ any business, employment, or mode of life, is the same as
to _stash_ it, _&c._ _See_ STASH.

STOW, STOW IT; or STOW FAKING, an intimation from a thief to his _pall_,
to desist from what he is about, on the occasion of some alarm, _&c._
_See_ AWAKE.

STOW, or STOW-MANGING, an intimation from one _flash-cove_ to another in
a mixed company to be silent, or drop the subject, he was upon. _See_
MANG.

STOW THAT. When a person advances any assertion which his auditor
believes to be false, or spoken in jest, or wishes the former to recant,
the latter will say, _stow that_, if you please, or, _cheese that_;
meaning don’t say so, or that’s out of the question.

STRETCH. Five or ten _stretch_, signifies five or ten yards, _&c._; so in
dealing for any article, as linen, _&c._, I will give you _three hog_ a
_stretch_, means, I’ll give three shillings a yard. _See_ HOG.

STRING. _See_ LINE.

STRUMMEL, the hair of the head. To get your _strummel faked in twig_, is
to have your hair dressed in style.

STUBBS, nothing.

SUIT, in general synonymous with _game_; as, what _suit_ did you _give
it to ’em upon_? in what manner did you rob them, or upon what pretence,
_&c._, did you defraud them? One species of imposition is said to be _a
prime suit_, another _a queer suit_: a man describing the pretext he used
to obtain money from another, would say, _I draw’d_ him _of a quid upon
the suit of_ so and so, naming the ground of his application. _See_ DRAW.
A person having engaged with another on very advantageous terms to serve
or work for him, will declare that he is _upon a good suit_. To use great
submission and respect in asking any favour of another, is called _giving
it to him upon the humble suit_.

SWAG, a bundle, parcel, or package; as a _swag_ of _snow_, _&c._ _The
swag_, is a term used in speaking of any booty you have lately obtained,
be it of what kind it may, except money, as Where did you _lumber the
swag_? that is, where did you deposit the stolen property? To carry _the
swag_ is to be the bearer of the stolen goods to a place of safety. _A
swag_ of any thing, signifies emphatically a great deal. To have _knap’d_
a good _swag_, is to have got a good booty.

SWAG. Wearing-apparel, linen, piece-goods, _&c._, are all comprehended
under the name of _swag_, when describing any _speak_ lately _made_,
_&c._, in order to distinguish them from plate, jewellery, or other more
portable articles.

SWELL, a gentleman; but any well-dressed person is emphatically termed
_a swell_, or a _rank swell_. A _family man_ who appears to have plenty
of money, and makes a genteel figure, is said by his associates to be
_in swell street_. Any thing remarkable for its beauty or elegance, is
called _a swell article_; so _a swell crib_, is a genteel house; _a swell
mollisher_, an elegantly-dressed woman, _&c._ Sometimes, in alluding
to a particular gentleman, whose name is not requisite, he is styled,
_the swell_, meaning the person who is the object of your discourse, or
attention; and whether he is called _the swell_, _the cove_, or _the
gory_, is immaterial, as in the following (in addition to many other)
examples:—I was _turned up_ at _China-street_, because _the swell_ would
not appear; meaning, of course, the prosecutor: again, speaking of a
person whom you were on the point of robbing, but who has taken the
alarm, and is therefore on his guard, you will say to your _pall_, It’s
of no use, _the cove_ is as _down as a hammer_; or, We may as well _stow
it, the gory’s leary_. _See_ COVE and DOWN.

SWIMMER, a guard-ship, or tender; a thief who escapes prosecution,
when before a magistrate, on condition of being sent on board the
receiving-ship, to serve His Majesty, is said by his _palls_ to be
_swimmered_.

SWISH’D, married.

SWODDY, or SWOD-GILL, a soldier.


T

TANNER, a sixpence. _Three and a tanner_, is three and sixpence, _&c._

TAT, to flog or scourge.

TATTS, dice.

TATT-BOX, a dice-box.

TATS AND ALL, an expression used _out of flash_, in the same manner as
the word _bender_; and has a similar meaning.

TEAZE, to flog, or whip.

THIMBLE, a watch.

THIMBLED, having, or wearing a watch.

THRUMS, THRUMBUSKINS, or a THRUM-MOP, three pence.

THROUGH IT, or THROUGH THE PIECE, getting acquitted on an indictment, or
surmounting any other trouble, or difficulty, is called _getting through
it_, or _thro’ the piece_; so, to _get_ a man _through it_, _&c._, is
to extricate him by virtue of your counsel and friendly assistance;
sometimes called _pulling_ him _through it_.

THROW OFF, to talk in a sarcastical strain, so as to convey offensive
allusions under the mask of pleasantry, or innocent freedom; but,
perhaps, secretly venting that abuse which you would not dare to give
in direct terms; this is called _throwing off_, a practice at which the
_flash_ ladies are very expert, when any little jealousies arise among
them. To begin to talk _flash_, and speak freely of robberies past, or
in contemplation, when in company with _family people_, is also termed
_throwing off_; meaning to banish all reserve, none but friends being
present; also, to sing when called on by the company present. _See_
CHAUNT.

TILBURY, a sixpence.

TINNY, a fire; a conflagration.

TINNY-HUNTERS, persons whose practice it is to attend fires, for the
purpose of plundering the unfortunate sufferers, under pretence of
assisting them to remove their property.

TIP, to give, pay, or bribe. To _take the tip_, is to receive a bribe in
any shape; and they say of a person who is known to be corruptible, that
he will _stand the tip_. _The tip_ is a term frequently used to signify
the money concerned in any dealings or contract existing between parties;
synonymous with _the dues_. _See_ DUES.

TITTER, a young woman or girl.

TOBY, to _toby_ a man, is to rob him on the highway; a person convicted
of this offence, is said to be _done_ for _a toby_. _The toby_ applies
exclusively to robbing on horseback; the practice of footpad robbery
being properly called _the spice_, though it is common to distinguish the
former by the title of _high-toby_, and the latter of _low-toby_.

TOBY-GILL, or TOBY-MAN, properly signifies a highwayman.

TODDLE, to walk slowly, either from infirmity or choice. Come, let us
_toddle_, is a familiar phrase, signifying, let us be going.

TODDLER, an infirm elderly person, or a child not yet perfect in walking.

TOG, a coat; to _tog_, is to dress or put on clothes; to _tog_ a person,
is also to supply them with apparel, and they are said to be well or
_queerly tog’d_, according to their appearance.

TOG’D OUT TO THE NINES, a fanciful phrase, meaning simply, that a person
is well or gaily dressed.

TOGS, or TOGGERY, wearing-apparel in general.

TOM BRAY’S BILK, laying out ace and deuce at cribbage.

TOM BROWN, twelve in hand, or crib.

TOOLS, implements for house-breaking, picklocks, pistols, _&c._, are
indiscriminately called _the tools_. A thief, convicted on the police
act, of having illegal instruments or weapons about him, is said to be
_fined for the tools_.

TOP, to _top_ a _clout_ or other article (among pickpockets) is to draw
the corner or end of it to the top of a person’s pocket, in readiness for
_shaking_ or _drawing_, that is, taking out, when a favourable moment
occurs, which latter operation is frequently done by a second person.

TOP’D, hanged.

TO THE NINES; or, TO THE RUFFIAN. These terms are synonymous, and imply
an extreme of any kind, or the superlative degree.

TOUT, to _tout_ a person, is to watch his motions; to keep _tout_, is to
look out, or watch, while your _pall_ is effecting any private purpose.
_A strong tout_, is a strict observation, or eye, upon any proceedings,
or person.

TOW; or, TOW-LINE. _See_ LINE. To _tow_ a person _out_; that is, from his
premises, or post: is to decoy him therefrom by some fictitious story, or
other artifice, while your _pall_ seizes the opportunity of his absence,
to rob the place he has imprudently quitted.

TRAPS, police officers, or runners, are properly so called; but it is
common to include constables of any description under this title.

TRICK. _See_ DO THE TRICK.

TRIG, a bit of stick, paper, _&c._, placed by thieves in the keyhole
of, or elsewhere about, the door of a house, which they suspect to be
uninhabited; if the _trig_ remains unmoved the following day, it is a
proof that no person sleeps in the house, on which the gang enter it the
ensuing night _upon the screw_, and frequently meet with a good booty,
such as beds, carpets, _&c._, the family being probably out of town. This
operation is called _trigging the jigger_.

TRY IT ON, to make any attempt, or essay, where success is doubtful. So
to _try it on with_ a woman, signifies to attempt her chastity.

TURN UP, to desist from, or relinquish, any particular habit or mode of
life, or the further pursuit of any object you had in view, is called
_turning it up_. To _turn up_ a mistress, or a male acquaintance, is
to drop all intercourse, or correspondence, with them. To _turn up_ a
particular house, or shop, you have been accustomed to use, or deal at,
signifies to withdraw your patronage, or custom, and visit it no more.
To quit a person suddenly in the street, whether secretly or openly,
is called _turning him up_. To _turn_ a man _up sweet_, is to get rid
of him effectually, but yet to leave him in perfect good humour, and
free from any suspicion or discontent; this piece of _finesse_ often
affords a field for the exercise of consummate address, as in the case of
_turning up a flat_, after having stript him of all his money at play,
or a shopkeeper, whom you have just robbed before his face of something
valuable, _upon the pinch_, or _the hoist_.

TURNED UP, a person acquitted by a jury, or discharged by a magistrate
for want of evidence, _&c._, is said to be _turned up_. _See_ SWELL.

TURNIPS, to give any body _turnips_ signifies to _turn_ him or her _up_,
and the party so _turned up_, is said to have _knap’d turnips_.

TURN UP A TRUMP, to be fortunate in getting a good _stake_, or by any
other means improving your finances.

TWIG, any thing accomplished cleverly, or as it should be, is said to be
done _in twig_, _in good twig_, or _in prime twig_. A person well dress’d
is said to be _in twig_. _See_ DROP, GAMMON THE TWELVE, and OUT OF TWIG.

TWISTED, hanged.

TWO POLL ONE. _See_ BRIDGE.

TYE IT UP, to _tye up_ any particular custom, practice, or habit, is
synonymous with _knifeing_, _stowing_, _turning it up_, or _stashing_
it. To _tye it up_ is a phrase, which, used emphatically, is generally
understood to mean quitting a course of depredation and wickedness. _See_
SQUARE, and DO THE TRICK.


U

UNBETTY, to unlock. _See_ BETTY.

UNDUB, to unlock, unfasten, _&c._ _See_ DUB UP.

UNPALLED, a thief whose associates are all apprehended, or taken from him
by other means, is said to be _unpalled_, and he is then obliged to _work
single-handed_.

UNSLOUR, to unlock, unfasten, or unbutton. _See_ SLOUR. Speaking of
a person whose coat is buttoned, so as to obstruct the access to his
pockets, the _knucks_ will say to each other, _the cove_ is _slour’d up_,
we must _unslour him_ to get at his _kickseys_.

UNTHIMBLE, to _unthimble_ a man, is to rob, or otherwise deprive him of
his watch.

UNTHIMBLED, having been divested of one’s watch.

UP IN THE STIRRUPS, a man who is _in swell street_. that is, having
plenty of money, is said to be _up in the stirrups_.

UPON THE CROSS. _See_ CROSS.

UPON THE SQUARE. _See_ SQUARE.

UPON THE SUIT, _&c._ _See_ SUIT.

UPPER-BEN, UPPER-BENJAMIN, UPPER-TOG, a great-coat.


V

VARDO, a waggon.

VARDO-GILL, a waggoner.


W

WACK, to share or divide any thing equally, as _wack the blunt_, divide
the money, _&c._

WACK, a share or equal proportion, as give me my _wack_, that is, my due
part.

WALKER, an ironical expression, synonymous with _bender_, and used in the
same manner.

WALKING-DISTILLER. _See_ CARRY THE KEG.

WANTED, when any of the _traps_ or runners have a private information
against a _family person_, and are using means to apprehend the party,
they say, such a one is _wanted_; and it becomes the latter, on receiving
such intimation to keep _out of the way_, until the _stink_ is over, or
until he or she can find means to _stash the business_ through the medium
of _Mr. Palmer_, or by some other means.

WATER-SNEAK, robbing ships or vessels on a navigable river, or canal, by
getting on board unperceived, generally in the night. _The water-sneak_,
is lately made a capital offence.

WEAR IT, to _wear it upon_ a person, (meaning to _wear a nose_, or _a
conk_,) is synonymous with _nosing_, _conking_, _splitting_, or _coming
it_, and is merely one of those fanciful variations so much admired by
_flash people_.

WEAR THE BANDS. _See_ BANDS.

WEDGE, silver; as a _wedge-feeder_, a silver-spoon, _&c._; but silver
coin, as well as silver plate, are both comprehended under the name of
_wedge_. _See_ RIDGE, and SPEAK TO.

WEED, tobacco.

WEED, to pilfer or purloin a small portion from a large quantity of
anything; often done by young or timid depredators, in the hope of
escaping detection, as, an apprentice or shopman will _weed_ his master’s
_lob_, that is, take small sums out of the till when opportunity offers,
which sort of peculation may be carried on with impunity for a length
of time; but experienced thieves sometimes think it good _judgment_ to
_weed_ a place, in order that it may be _good_ again, perhaps for a
considerable length of time, as in the instance of a warehouse, or other
depôt for goods, to which they may possess the means of access by means
of a false key; in this case, by taking too great _a swag_, at first, the
proprietors would discover the deficiency, and take measures to prevent
future depredation. To _weed the swag_ is to embezzle part of the booty,
unknown to your _palls_, before a division takes place, a temptation
against which very few of _the family_ are proof, if they can find an
opportunity. A _flash-cove_, on discovering a deficiency in his purse
or property, which he cannot account for, will declare that he, (or it,
naming the article,) has been _wedded to the ruffian_.

WEEDING DUES, speaking of any person, place, or property, that has been
_weeded_, it is said _weeding dues_ have been concerned. _See_ DUES.

WEIGH FORTY, term used by the police, who are as well versed in _flash_
as the thieves themselves. It is often customary with the _traps_, to
wink at depredations of a petty nature, and for which no reward would
attach, and to let a thief _reign_ unmolested till he commits a capital
crime. They then _grab_ him, and, on conviction, share (in many cases)
a reward of 40_l._, or upwards; therefore these gentry will say, Let
him alone at present, we don’t _want_ him till he _weighs his weight_,
meaning, of course, forty pounds.

WELL, to _well_ your accomplice, or _put him in the well_, is explained
under the word GARDEN, which _see_.

WHIDDLE, to speak of, or mention any thing, as, Don’t you _whiddle_ about
so and so, that is, don’t mention it.

WHIDDLER, a talkative or tell-tale person, who is not fit to be trusted
with a secret.

WHIDS, words. _See_ CRACK A WHID.

WHISTLERS. _See_ BROWNS AND WHISTLERS.

WIN, or WINCHESTER, a penny.

WIND, a man transported for his natural life, is said to be _lag’d for
his wind_, or to have _knap’d a winder_, or _a bellowser_, according to
the humour of the speaker.

WOOLLY-BIRDS, sheep.

WORK. To _work upon_ any particular _game_, is to practise generally,
that species of fraud or depredation, as, He _works upon the crack_,
he follows house-breaking, _&c._ An offender having been detected in
the very fact, particularly in cases of coining, colouring base-metal,
_&c._, is emphatically said to have been _grab’d at work_, meaning to
imply, that the proof against him being so plain, he has no ground of
defence to set up.

WRINKLE, to lie, or utter a falsehood.

WRINKLE, an untruth.

WRINKLER, a person prone to lying; such a character is called also _a
gully_, which is probably an abbreviation of Gulliver, and from hence, to
_gully_ signifies to lie, or deal in the marvellous.


Y

YACK, a watch (obsolete.)

YARN, _yarning_ or _spinning a yarn_, is a favourite amusement among
_flash-people_; signifying to relate their various adventures, exploits,
and escapes to each other. This is most common and gratifying, among
persons in confinement or exile, to enliven a dull hour, and probably
excite a secret hope of one day enjoying a repetition of their former
pleasures. _See_ BONED. A person expert at telling these stories, is said
to _spin a fine yarn_. A man using a great deal of rhetoric, and exerting
all his art to talk another person out of any thing he is intent upon,
the latter will answer, Aye, Aye, you can _spin a good yarn_, but it
won’t do; meaning, all your eloquence will not have the desired effect.

YELLOW, jealous; a jealous husband is called a _yellow gloak_.

YOKUFF, a chest, or large box.

YORK. To stare or look at any person in an impertinent manner, is termed
_yorking_; to _york_ any thing, in a common sense, is to view, look at,
or examine it.

YORK, a look, or observation; a _flash-cove_ observing another person (_a
flat_) who appears to notice or scrutinize him, his proceedings, or the
company he is with, will say to his _palls_, That _cove_ is _yorking as
strong as a horse_, or, There is _York-street concerned_.

YOUKELL, a countryman, or clown.

YOURNABS, yourself; an emphatical term used in speaking to another person.


FINIS.

Printed by W. CLOWES, Northumberland-court, Strand.




FOOTNOTES


[52] The Author (a prisoner under sentence of transportation for life)
having, by an alleged act of impropriety, incurred the Governor’s
displeasure, was at this period banished to Newcastle, a place of
punishment for offenders: these sheets were there compiled during his
solitary hours of cessation from hard labour; and the Commandant was
accordingly presented by the Author with the first copy of his production.



*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 73187 ***