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diff --git a/old/68405-0.txt b/old/68405-0.txt deleted file mode 100644 index de84a48..0000000 --- a/old/68405-0.txt +++ /dev/null @@ -1,1406 +0,0 @@ -The Project Gutenberg eBook of The Philistine: a periodical of -protest (Vol. I, No. 5, October 1895), by Various - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and -most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions -whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms -of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at -www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you -will have to check the laws of the country where you are located before -using this eBook. - -Title: The Philistine: a periodical of protest (Vol. I, No. 5, October - 1895) - -Author: Various - -Release Date: June 25, 2022 [eBook #68405] - -Language: English - -Produced by: hekula03 and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at - https://www.pgdp.net (This book was produced from images - made available by the HathiTrust Digital Library.) - -*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE PHILISTINE: A PERIODICAL -OF PROTEST (VOL. I, NO. 5, OCTOBER 1895) *** - - - - - - - The Philistine - A Periodical of Protest. - - _Would to God my name were not so terrible - to the enemy as it is._—HENRY VIII. - - [Illustration: No. Five.] - - Printed Every Little While - for The Society of The Philistines - and Published by - Them Monthly. Subscription, - One Dollar Yearly - Single Copies, 10 Cents. - October, 1895. - - - - -_SPECIAL._ - - -The Bibelot for 1895, complete in the original wrappers, uncut, is now -supplied on full paid subscriptions only, at 75 cents net. - -On completion of Volume I in December the price will be $1.00 net in -wrappers, and $1.50 net in covers. INVARIABLY POSTPAID. - -Covers for Volume I ready in November. These will be in old style boards, -in keeping with the artistic make-up of THE BIBELOT, and are supplied at -30 cents, postpaid. _End papers and Title-page are included_, whereby the -local binder can case up the volume at about the cost of postage were it, -as is usual, returned to the publisher for binding. - -Back Numbers are 10 cents each, subject to further advance as the edition -decreases. - -=Numbers Issued:= - - _I._ _Lyrics from William Blake._ - _II._ _Ballades from Francois Villon._ - _III._ _Mediæval Latin Students’ Songs._ - _IV._ _A Discourse of Marcus Aurelius._ - _V._ _Fragments from Sappho._ - _VI._ _Sonnets on English Dramatic Poets._ - _VII._ _The Pathos of the Rose in Poetry._ - _VIII._ _Lyrics from James Thomson (B. V.)_ - _IX._ _Hand and Soul: D. G. Rosetti._ - _X._ _A Book of Airs from Campion, (October.)_ - - THOMAS B. MOSHER, Publisher, - Portland, Maine. - - - - -_LITTLE JOURNEYS_ - -To the Homes of Good Men and Great. - -_A series of literary studies published in monthly numbers, tastefully -printed on hand-made paper, with attractive title-page._ - -By ELBERT HUBBARD - -The publishers announce that Little Journeys will be issued monthly and -that each number will treat of recent visits made by Mr. Elbert Hubbard -to the homes and haunts of various eminent persons. The subjects for the -first twelve numbers have been arranged as follows: - - 1. George Eliot - 2. Thomas Carlyle - 3. John Ruskin - 4. W. E. Gladstone - 5. J. M. W. Turner - 6. Jonathan Swift - 7. Victor Hugo - 8. Wm. Wordsworth - 9. W. M. Thackeray - 10. Charles Dickens - 11. Oliver Goldsmith - 12. Shakespeare - -_LITTLE JOURNEYS: Published Monthly, 50 cents a year. Single copies, 5 -cents, postage paid._ - -Published by G. P. PUTNAM’S SONS, - - 27 and 29 West 23d Street, New York. - 24 Bedford Street, Strand, London. - - - - -AT THIS TIME THE PROPRIETORS OF THE ROYCROFT PRINTING SHOP, at East -Aurora, New York, announce the publication about Christmas time of an -exquisite edition of the JOURNAL OF KOHELETH, otherwise the Book of -Ecclesiastes, reparagraphed. - -With a bit of an introduction by Mr. Elbert Hubbard, whimsical, perhaps, -but sincere, wherein the rich quality of the text is commended to those -over thirty, and under: with explanations, always reverent, that may be -useful. - -=This book, printed by hand on Dickinson’s hand made paper, will mark -an era in the art of printing in America. The edition, limited to 750 -copies, will be bound in flexible Japan vellum, wrapped and boxed. Each -book numbered, and signed by the editor.= - -Yes, do you send me a book for my birthday. Not a bargain book, bought -from a haberdasher, but a beautiful book, a book to caress—peculiar, -distinctive and individual: a book that hath first caught your eye and -then pleased your fancy, written by an author with a tender whim—all -right out of his heart. We will read it together in the gloaming, and -when the gathering dusk doth blur the page we’ll sit with hearts too full -for speech and think it over.—DOROTHY WORDSWORTH TO COLERIDGE. - - - - -THE PHILISTINE. - -Edited by H. P. TABER. - - - THE ROYCROFT PRINTING SHOP, - East Aurora, New York, - Publishers. - -THE PHILISTINE is published monthly at $1 a year, 10 cents a single -copy. Subscriptions may be left with newsdealers or sent direct to the -publishers. The trade supplied by the AMERICAN NEWS COMPANY and its -branches. Foreign agencies, BRENTANO’S, 37 Avenue de l’Opera, Paris; G. -P. PUTNAM’S SONS, 24 Bedford street, Strand, London. - -Business communications should be addressed to THE PHILISTINE, East -Aurora, New York. Matter intended for publication may be sent to the same -address or to Box 6, Cambridge, Massachusetts. - -_Entered at the Postoffice at East Aurora, New York, for transmission as -mail matter of the second class._ - -_COPYRIGHT, 1895, by H. P. Taber._ - - * * * * * - -=The Book Shop=, Rare Books, Garfield Building, Bond street, Cleveland, -Ohio. - - * * * * * - -=George P. Humphrey=, Old Books, Catalogues issued, 25 Exchange street, -Rochester, N. Y. - - - - -THE PHILISTINE. - - NO. 5. October, 1895. VOL. 1. - - - - -RHADAMANTHINA IVRA. - - _Castigat auditque dolos subigitque fateri._ - - -It was the custom of the Roman _Prætor Urbanus_ when entering upon his -duties to post up in plain view of the public a brief exposition of the -principles which were to guide him in passing judgment during his year of -office. It seems fit that the PHILISTINE should likewise issue its own -EDICTVM PERPETVVM setting forth the scope and ultimate purpose of such -literary criticisms as may appear from time to time in its pages. - -It is offenders only who are to be deemed worthy of Reviews in these -columns and as the worst possible offence of which they can be guilty, -since it includes all specific or lesser faults, is the bare fact of -their existence in type, it will be our aim to hold up to the merited -scorn of an outraged world the responsible progenitors of such unblessed -offspring, the Publisher, and his partner in sin, the Author of the book. - -In thus reversing that order in criminality which has hitherto obtained -in the assizes of criticism we are moved by the consideration among -others: the writing of any book, good or bad, is a matter of concern -to its author alone so long as it remains in manuscript. Its merits or -demerits have alike no existence to the public; however shameless its -morals, feeble its plot or intolerable its dullness these are all equally -powerless for mischief so long as it has not been put into type and -launched upon a much suffering, helpless world. Then its career of evil -begins. For this the Publisher is solely responsible; he and he alone is -able to remedy the abuses which have long been calling out to heaven for -suppression, by setting up some sort of standard as to the minimum of -those defects which shall bar any manuscript whatever from his favorable -consideration. What this minimum ought to be we shall take pleasure in -enlightening him from time to time in these pages. - -It may be urged that the weapon of scorn has been used and abused time -out of mind; we reply that the objector is in error in one essential. -The dart is an old one indeed, but its point has been blunted, not in -the fattening tissues of this chief offender but on the scantily clad -bones of his weaker accomplice, the much-abused author. In issuing an -illegitimate book the Author is the victim of the sweetest and most -pathetic fallacy known to men: _he believes his work is good_; while the -publisher knows better. One is animated by love and nature, the other -has only a lust for dollars. In such offenses as we are discussing, no -less than in certain others needing no more explicit designation, it is -not the deed itself but its exposure which calls forth the protests of a -PHILISTINE public. Those Little Sisters in Sin, _A Superfluous Woman_ and -_Bessie Costrell_ might have faded to oblivion in their swaddling clothes -had no publisher been found to expose them to daylight. - -It will be understood therefore that our column of Reviews exists, not -to aid struggling authors or enterprising publishers to launch their -craft upon the already crowded ocean of Literature, but as the Pillory -where manifest culprits are exposed to the jibes of the crowd, to the end -that others who are meditating like deeds may be warned by such penalty -to desist. Nor need the idle stocks ever yawn in emptiness so long as -upon his right hand and his left a man beholds such a richness of backs -itching for the lash. - -And since we have promised that instruction shall go hand in hand with -castigation we will not close until we have pointed out for the future -guidance of those who may wish to avoid one at least of the many by-paths -of reprobation, that in any novel we regard the existence of page Four -Hundred of readable type as confession on the part of both Publisher and -Author that neither of them has yet learned the foremost and greatest of -the arts of their trade—the art to blot. - -_De confessis sicuti de manifestis—supplicium sumendum est._ - - -A TRINITY OF OFFENDERS. - - 1. THE LAND OF THE SUN, _a third rate guide-book to Mexico, and - incidentally a Touter for one of its Railways_; by Christian - Reid, a woman who once wrote a good novel, superfluously - illustrated, 12mo. cloth, pp. 355. D. Appleton & Co., N. Y., - $1.75. - - 2. LOVE IN IDLENESS, by F. Marion Crawford, author of ETC., - _etc._, & etc., absurdly illustrated, crown 8vo., cloth, - gilt-edge, pp. 218. Macmillan & Co., N. Y., $2.00. - - 3. ADVICE TO LITERARY ASPIRANTS—_One Hundred Ways to Become - Famous for One Dollar_, by Mr. Arthur Lewis, illustrated, - 12mo., pp. 247. Dodd, Rott & Co., N. Y., $1.00. - -1. We are but too familiar, all of us, with the devices of the -quack-medicine advertiser, his trick of getting us to read his puff in -spite of ourselves. It is an old yet still successful dodge. The first -sentence in a column of the morning paper promises a little ten minute -romance. As we proceed our interest quickens. We inadvertently glance -to the end to learn whether the hero is destined to the rope or the -heroine reserved for the altar. There stands forth the mark of the Beast, -“_Butcher’s Bilious Bouncer_, sure cure for the Liver, price ten cents.” -According as nature has allied us to Democritus or to Archilochus we -laugh or swear at our gullibility while we turn to some other item, but -if fair-minded men we do not swear at the editor, for we know that he -lives by letting for hire his numberless columns with no restriction on -his advertisers save that their matter does not exclude his paper from -the United States Mail. - -It is far different, however, when trusting in an author’s name or at -least in the imprint of a publisher of high standing, a man takes up a -book which he has bought in the expectation of finding it a readable or -at all events a genuine novel, but soon discovers it to be a string of -sausages, whose thin membrane of such romance as it does afford exists -merely to encase a solid stuffing of railroad advertisements, “scenic -route” business and such secondhand truck. Yet of such is the _Land of -the Sun_. Before reading it myself I tendered it to a friend in answer -to his request for the latest novel. A few days after, he returned it -saying, “It opens more like an advertisement of the Bullseye Parlor Car -Company.” - -Now it so happens that the people who made the book are also publishers -of guide-books and among these of a guide-book to Mexico, _eo nomine_, -it had been fitter and more worthy their own high standing had they not -stooped to palm off such a farrago upon a man whose thoughts at the time -were not how to get to Mexico nor what could be seen if he went there, -but simply the means of beguiling an evening, lolling at ease in his -smoking jacket. - -As to the lady who was once equal to writing _The Land of the Sky_, one -feels sorrow at her fall, and cannot help wondering if sin of this sort -yields her either profit or pleasure. - -2. If a reader were asked to single out some one publisher whose name -should be guarantee that in buying a book one would get fair equivalent -for his money, not in paper and ink alone, but in the stuff of its ideas, -he would not often go amiss were he to name Macmillans. It is with double -pain therefore that he resents being led astray into paying Two Dollars -for such a trifling effusion as _Love in Idleness_. He is hurt not only -by the one and one-half dollars lost in excess of any just valuation of -the book, but also and perhaps by a less reparable loss of the confidence -long deserved by the class of Macmillan publications. In short he feels -that both publisher and writer have conspired to cinch him and the rest -of the reading public, and here, too, the heavier share of the reproach -must fall upon the man. If Mr. Marion Crawford, pluming himself upon -such past achievements as _Mr. Isaacs_, chooses to value the weakling of -his decadence at such extravagant figures that it must be listed at Two -Dollars if it is to appear in decent type, there is surely no need that -his accomplice be Macmillan. Doubtless there be publishers whose horns -would be exalted were Crawford’s name to shine upon their title pages, -but Macmillan is not of such cattle; he stands among the very topmost -already, wherefore he should be above impostures. - -The book is freely illustrated, but the pictures have nothing to do with -the persons and incidents of the story. - -3. As the editor of the Only Real Sure-Enough _Chip-Munk_ so truthfully -points out in his every issue, man is an imitative animal. But whether -it is equally true that there are hundreds and hundreds of imitation -chip-munks, all made like those calico cats that do duty as bric-a-brac, -I cannot say. Yet the undisputed statement, made in such a solemn way, -that man is imitative, must stand. - -On ascending a certain beautiful little bay along the coast of Maine, the -traveller is confronted by the startling legend, painted on the face of -a great palisade: _This is Belfast, the Home of Gringo’s Vermifuge—One -Hundred Doses for One Dollar_. - -And to-day at Franklin, Ohio, as the train stops at the water tank one -sees in the pasture opposite, an immense bill board, and on the board in -gigantic letters are the words: _This is Franklin, the Home of Jingo’s -Advice to Authors—One Hundred Places to sell Manuscript, One Dollar_. - -That a place is needed to sell manuscript I will admit—in fact I am -looking for such a place, but I only require _one_ place, not a hundred. -So I am suspicious of Mr. Jingo: I think that he offers just ninety-nine -times more than is meet, and so I turn to Mr. Arthur Lewis of Albany, -who has in the press a book with a title suspiciously like the Ohio -publication. It is called _Advice to Literary Aspirants—One Hundred Ways -to Become Famous for One Dollar_. Advance sheets of this work show that -the author has expended considerable care on it. He marshals statistics -to show that only one out of 97,621 of the men who write books ever -secure even a tuppence worth of fame. In fact he proves that fame and -good writing have no more to do with each other than Art and Truth, -Virtue and Profession, Marriage and Constancy. He therefore concludes -that the Literary Aspirant should secure his Fame first and launch his -Literature afterward, and in this way take the tide at its flood and move -on to fortune. To this end the gifted author gives one hundred ways of -securing fame. He starts with Homicide and runs through to Arson and -Bridge Jumping, giving incidentally fourteen different kinds of Scandal -and how to bring it about. - -In my own mind I have always made a distinction between illustrious men, -famous men and notorious men, but Mr. Lewis avers that in our day and -generation such fine shades are all obliterated by the bright iridescence -of the standard dollar. An author, he says, succeeds only as his books -sell, and if his name is on the lips of rumor, women especially will -besiege the stores and demand his tomes. - -Now we must admit that the fine sophistry that Mr. Lewis brings to bear -is interesting, but is it Art? Further than this, does it fill a vacuum -in the great economic cosmos of Letters? I do not think that it does, -and therefore do not hesitate to flatly give it as my opinion that while -the author is sincere, the publishers are moved by no other motive than -to secure the money of ambitious young men and women, having first -victimized Mr. Lewis for the cost of plates and the first edition. That -the work, like all skillful sophistry, is inspiring to the young, there -is no doubt, but the final effect of the book on society I believe will -be damaging, and therefore I cannot conscientiously recommend it. - - - - -A JOURNALISTIC NOTE. - - -Our valued co-worker in the vineyard, the Rev. George H. Hepworth, has -begun to cast his Sunday _Herald_ sermons in the first person singular -and affix his distinguished name thereto. If this will make these sermons -no better it will at least make them no worse. - -As long-time admirers of these admirable Sabbath sermocinations THE -PHILISTINE welcomes this innovation. And we think we know the wherefore -of it. The Rev. Mr. Hepworth’s name attached to an article denunciatory -of sin will have a tendency to strike terror into the heart of Beelzebub, -and it was for this reason, no doubt, that Mr. Bennett directed Brother -Hepworth to take the field in person. - -Unquestionably this will add a new and livelier interest to the church. -Each combatant knows exactly whom he is fighting. It is now Hepworth -against Satan with a fair field and no favor. We have no hesitancy -in saying that so far as Mr. Hepworth is concerned there will be no -_Valkyrie_ business. Moreover there is no desire to shirk responsibility. -What he has to say he will say fearlessly over his own signature, and if -those against whom these ecclesiastical thunderbolts are launched do not -like them they know what they can do. Wot t’ell! - - ROBERT W. CRISWELL. - - - - -“_De mortuis nil nisi bonum._” - - - “Speak no evil of the dead:” - Standard story that of Cain; - Sence his vitle spark has fled, - Dast a soul of him complain? - Did his brother mortle harm, - Lied about the thing, to God; - His’n the fust abandoned farm; - Skipped to Canady or Nod. - Like some latter-day ex-gent, - Sorry—for his punishment. - - Judas did a traitor’s deed, - ’Scuse, I beg, the mention here, - Bein’ his life has gone to seed - (Scattered far and wide, I fear), - Of him may no ill be sayed, - Though this miscreant for gain - The one perfec’ Man betrayed - To be crucified and slain: - Went and killed hisself withal— - After readin’ Ingersoll. - - Stay! That max’m mayn’t be true; - In old heathen Rome ’twas bred; - Livin’ men should have in view - What’s the status of ’em dead. - Conduc’ stands—time don’t forswear’t— - Even to a lord’s disgrace, - When with Cain and Judas Scairt - He has went ter his own place. - Cains and Judases, don’t guess - Death will make you a success. - - L. S. GOODWIN. - - - - -SIDE TALKS WITH THE PHILISTINES: BEING SUNDRY BITS OF WISDOM WHICH HAVE -BEEN HERETOFORE SECRETED, AND ARE NOW SET FORTH IN PRINT. - - -If THE PHILISTINE disturbs placid self-complacency anywhere, as one or -two of its critics intimate, it is sorry, for there is no such happiness -attainable anywhere this side of Nirvana as its serene contemplation of -the charms of self which Narcissus and some more modern fakirs exemplify; -and the magazine of to-day is its gospel. But so good a Philistine as -Horace Greeley is my authority for believing that the still pool in which -self-love sees the reflection it feeds upon is a breeder of death, not -life, and effervescence is the sworn foe of the morbid. Not the things -we do that we ought not to do, but the things left undone that we ought -to do are the primary count leading up to the confession that “there -is no health in us.” The other follows. Stagnation and the miasma of -self-consciousness co-exist and are not to be separated. Wherefore, -fellow-egoists, let us get a gait on. - - * * * * * - -I like the broad flourish with which some imaginative writers connect -widely separated events in a stroke of the pen and omit all that lies -between as mere incident. It seems to me a proof of the theory put -forward by my good friend Elbert Hubbard that genius is a feminine -element of character—in man or woman. For example, I find this statement -in the latest of the _Little Journeys_: “Moses was sent adrift, but the -tide carried him into power.” I didn’t know just what that meant till I -recalled the discovery of the bulrush cradle. A less intuitive writer -wouldn’t have bridged eighty years in that summary way. He might have -hinted at Moses’s police court record—told how he killed an Egyptian for -calling him a son of a Populist or something and skun out for half a -lifetime and yet became a Prince of Egypt and spent forty years or so at -court before he took the road with the forefathers of Brickmaker Tourgee. -But to connect the condensed milk baby in the market basket on the Nile -with the law-giver of Israel in one movement, as the music people say, -is a pretty long span and suggests the liberty David Copperfield takes -with his own biography in the best book but one written by the subject -of the latest _Little Journey_. “I was born:” he says—and all else is -irrelevant. I take it that Mr. Hubbard agrees with John Boyle O’Reilly -that “the world was made when a man was born.” The feminine element -of genius which Mr. Hubbard tells us makes poets is manifest in that -formula. If the author of the _Journeys_ will permit, I would suggest -that the same mother instinct that crops out there is manifested in -the grasp of a life in the compass of a sentence which puzzled me at -the first. To be born and to die is the record of existence, to which -all else is tributary; and the pangs of birth and death thrill all the -poet-strains. Only the tragedy that sweeps along the strings lives to -echo in human hearts. It is the deathless minor chord that distinguishes -the melody of true poetry from the dancing cadences of rhyme in all -literature. The undertone is the soul of all song, in verse or in the -unmeasured periods of epic prose. - - * * * * * - -Mention of Moses recalls the perhaps unique fact that a priest of the -most austere of churches rolled off a tongue, musical with brogue, in -his newspaper sanctum—for he is a priest of the pen too—this romantic -version of the basket story which I have never seen anywhere but in his -paper—then in the process of make-up: - - On Egypt’s banks, convaynient to the Nile, - Great Pharaoh’s daughter went to bathe in shtyle, - And shtooping down, as everyone supposes - To scratch her shin, she shpied the infant Moses: - Then turning to her maids, in accents wild - Cried: “Tare an’ ’ouns, girls, which o’ yes owns the chyild?” - - * * * * * - -I observe that the editor of the _Arena_ is about to make a contract with -the Michigan Wheel Company of Lansing, Michigan, for large quantities -of its product to give as prizes to new contributors only, the old ones -being already well supplied. - - * * * * * - -The following advertisement is clipped from one of the October magazines: - - MANUSCRIPT RECORD. - - A handsome method for keeping track of manuscripts. Contains - space for recording one hundred manuscripts, showing title, - where sent, number of words, when returned or accepted, when - paid for and amount, when published, postage account, etc. Each - page a complete history of one manuscript, from the time it is - first sent out, until published and paid for. Price, $1.25. - Sent postpaid to any address on receipt of price. - - THE BOHEMIAN PUBLISHING CO., - Pike Building, Cincinnati, O. - -I have sent for this book, as it is my intention to write one hundred -manuscripts, and I desire to keep track of them until published and paid -for. I have therefore ordered the book bound in cast iron. - - * * * * * - -In a recent number of _Modern Art_ protest is filed against the editor of -the _Chip-Munk_ continuing to ask that startling question “Do You Keep -a Dog?” In God’s name, what right have the Chicago Decadents to thus -pry into our private affairs? Is it not bad enough when the _Chip-Munk_ -advises us to drink Guzzle’s beer and use Culby’s soap without being -interrogated as to what we “keep?” - - * * * * * - -Among the revivals which occur now and then in everything is a discussion -of an old “science” of reading characters by the hair. I don’t know much -about it, but from what I have heard I believe a pair of old she-bears -set back the theory for a few centuries when they chewed up the small -boys that poked fun at Elijah. The old man would be rated as having -no character, according to these “readers,” for he had no hair, but -Providence and the early Ursulines vindicated him. - - * * * * * - -A new woman who has been reading _God’s Fool_ laid it down at the last -chapter with a long sigh. “What do you think of it,” I asked. “It is -dramatic,” she said, “terribly dramatic at the end,” and then added, -after a pause, “I wonder what the reading of the next generation will -be like. We have reached a force and directness of narration that seems -to me to be pretty near the limit of possibility. What will we have -next?” “What do you think?” I asked. “I think,” she said, “we will have -a reaction. We will take in more and give out less. We are near one of -the great periods of what has been called revelation in the past. Our -literature is shallow but perfect, relatively, in expression. Our art is -the same throughout. Our politics are personal. Our religion is liberal, -and loose in the joints. Our social life is insincere and imitative. -Our lives have nothing in them to stir the deeps. There will be a -reaction. The finesse of expression will be set aside for the tremendous -earnestness that accompanies great events and prints their lessons on -receptive minds. A break-up in Europe it may be, or some other social -convulsion, that will change the tide. We are pretty near at the top of -the flood now.” That’s the new woman’s view. I wonder how near she’s -right? - - * * * * * - -Three hundred and twenty-seven thousand of my friends have individually -sent to me a recent number of my Philadelphia contemporary, _Footlights_, -in which it refers to THE PHILISTINE variously as a crow, a dicky bird -and “a birdie of the jackass breed.” I am glad to be catalogued in this -ornithological manner, and my friends may accept the listing as they -please. As for myself, I’d rather be a good honest wild ass of the desert -with long fuzzy ears than a poor imitation bird-of-paradise—stuffed by -one hundred and seventeen geniuses. - - * * * * * - -A matter of architecture has been involved in the social problem which -the _Arena_ has ever with it—like a stutter or a beer breath. According -to an alleged novel recently published by the Arena Company and called -_Edith, a Story of Chinatown_, a feature of the tabooed district of Los -Angeles, California, is a bay window projection on the houses devoted -to vice, wherein beauty spreads lures for the eyes of passers-by. The -heroine of this lovely romance is one of these persons, sinned against in -the prologue and sinning in the present, but discovered by a miraculous -New York reporter on a vacation and returned to her broken-hearted -parents and a good life. A benediction, with a remote hint of the -Lohengrin march, ends the story. The _Arena_ gives two pages to a review -of the book, which is very kind of the publisher, and tells us therein -that a description of Alameda street and of Dupont street, San Francisco, -which is worse, is its purpose. The _Arena_ can be depended on for a full -stock of “terrible examples.” - - * * * * * - -The _Literary Digest_ is falling into line admirably. Recently it printed -a translation from some French source from which I clip the following: - - A Parisian literary man has been complaining that authors are - not represented at international expositions in the same sense - as are painters and sculptors. The complaint has provoked - sarcastic comment from M. Maurice Goncourt, who, in _Charivari_ - (Paris), suggests that, since an exhibition of their works - would not be sufficiently striking, the authors themselves - should be put on show in cages! - - “All the writers who are at present the incontestable masters - of romance and journalism will transport, during the period - of the Exposition, their working rooms to a section specially - provided for them. - - “The public will see them there as they really are at home, - surrounded with their furniture, their books, all their - accessories, and in working costume. - - “From such an hour to such an hour—as at home—they will work on - their articles, poems, or novels. - - “That would draw a crowd; that would be truly interesting! - - “They could be looked at through a sheet of glass or a - lattice—silently, so as not to interfere with their inspiration. - - “The administration could even put up signs like this: - - PLEASE THROW NOTHING TO THE POETS, - - or—more particularly for the pretty visitors: - - DON’T EXCITE THE PSYCHOLOGISTS. - -All this sounds much as though it had been written by the keeper of _The -Literary Shop_, but I don’t believe it was. Supposing, however, such an -exhibit were held at Atlanta with the Fair now in progress. Imagine Mr. -Gilder and James Knapp Reeve, Mr. Le Gallienne and Laura Jean Libbey, -Count Tolstoi and Mrs. Mary Jane Holmes, each in his or her own coop -like a Leghorn chicken! Imagine Colonel S. S. McClure (Limited) with his -Menagerie of Trained Thoroughbreds, each one of them exhibiting by his -emaciation the horrible results of syndicate writing! Imagine Cy Warman -pawing madly at the bars of his cage trying to tell Sweet Marie about -the secret in his heart! Then imagine Little Tin God of Philadelphia, -cuddled up in his basket, writing his masterpiece, _How to Feed a Sick -Kitten!_ To them then would enter Major John Boyd Thacher, the pride and -joy of the Albany Democracy, and judge equally both the just and the -unjust. It’s a great idea. - - * * * * * - -One of my correspondents tells me that “the editor of the _Lark_ uses -execrable perfume on his note paper.” This item is for the future -reference of Mr. Burgess when he writes about his literary passions. - - * * * * * - -Several solemn newspapers have taken seriously to the extent of half a -column or so the proposal of a San Francisco publishing house to “bring -out good literature in a cheap form,” which sounds much like the advance -agent talk of most publishing houses. It isn’t a joke, to be sure, but a -good deal depends on what is meant by “good literature.” Thundering in -the prologue is not a novelty, but there may be a storm coming for all -that. - - * * * * * - -I note that the brilliant Bok has gone to writing proverbs. Here is one -culled at random from “A Handful of Laconics,” printed under his honored -signature in his September output: - - It is singular and yet a fact that what we are most loath - to believe possessed by others is what we are incapable of - ourselves. - -It is my wish to call the particular attention of my readers to -this nugget. From a literary and philosophic standpoint literature -contains nothing like it. Examine Rochefoucauld, Montaigne, -Plutarch, Pliny the Elder, Pliny the Younger or Solomon, and you -will not find its fellow. Read it again, and read it slowly: -“It-is-singular-yet-a-fact-that-what-we-are-most-loath-to-believe- -possessed-by-others-is-what-we-are-incapable-of-ourselves.” -This is undoubtedly the finest thing in the language and a reward of -one million dollars will be paid to any PHILISTINE who will furnish the -solution. There is no bar against reading it backwards. It reads a little -better backwards than forwards, but I do not think that is it. - - * * * * * - -I desire to record a discovery. I found a magazine the other day with the -advertising pages uncut. - - * * * * * - -I doubt if Bliss Carman has had a more enthusiastic admirer than I. When -his _Vagabondia_ appeared I sent a copy to Her, which was the greatest -compliment I could pay the book. In the magazines, notably in _Town -Topics_, he has printed verses that were well worth preserving as some -of the best of the decade. In the great mass, however, which he has -published, there have been lines which nobody on earth could understand. -They were worse than Stephen Crane’s, for he at least has a vague idea -somewhere, though he rarely does us the favor to express it in a seemly -manner. Now I want to protest, not only against Mr. Carman, but against -_Life_, which gave us _The Whale and the Sprat_ which Mr. Carman wrote -recently. Here are two of the stanzas: - - My dear Mr. Sprat, - I really am grat- - Ified at your offer. - So down they both sat. - - Said the Sprat to the Whale, - I admire your tail; - I should think it would be - Of great use in a gale. - -How Mr. Metcalfe ever allowed such drivel to get into his columns I -cannot understand. Possibly while he was in Japan the compositor set the -stuff in the waste basket instead of that on the copy hook. - - * * * * * - -_Vogue_ asserts that “thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s wife” is the -ninth commandment. On information and belief, no doubt. - - * * * * * - -Because Mr. Rockefeller sneers at Mr. Pullman for giving but a paltry -hundred thousand for a church at Albion, Orleans County, New York, Mr. -Pullman retorts that Rockefeller is only a malmsey-nosed varlet anyway, -whose grease his axles are not worthy to unloose. I am not quite ready to -take George M. into the Philistinic fold, but he is surely coming my way. - - * * * * * - -I rejoice to find a thoughtful article by Richard Burton on the -“Renascence of Old English Expression” in the current _Forum_—and not -so much for what is in the article in detail as for its recognition of -the main fact that there is something besides Bunthornism in the harking -back to the simple dignity of early English. Our author, it will be -noted, has little use for the overflowing maimed vowels of Normanesque -“Renaissance.” Plain Latin renascence is good enough in a plea for the -Saxon. But it is odd if so simple a thing as a rising from death into new -life has no Saxon equivalent. Why not “re birth!” - - * * * * * - -Since the Mule-Spinners at Cohoes and Fall River went out on a strike I -understand that subscriptions to _The Writer_ have fallen off one-third. - - * * * * * - -Neith Boyce is a poet who never beats the brush piles of thought without -starting good game. She writes good honest verse and she also writes -“Book Notes and News” and other things for the _New Cycle_. The _New -Cycle_, by the way, is not published by the Pope Manufacturing Company as -one might suppose, but it is a monthly magazine “devoted to Education, -Social Economics, Literature and Art.” I once edited a magazine devoted -to Education, but the subject proved too large for the brainful syndicate -that employed me; I have also written a book on Art; and once, having -nothing to do, I lectured for a space on Social Economics, but God help -me! I never in a small monthly magazine attempted to tell all about -Education, Social Economics, Literature _and_ Art. - -But the _New Cycle_ is interesting, and if its various departments were -as well cared for as its Book Notes and News it would be a greater -success than it is. Neith Boyce has an unfailing insight and her touch is -as light and as sure as my own; and moreover there is a tang to her wit -that all bookish Philistines might well cultivate. In classic lore I have -always looked up to Miss Boyce as the Court of last Appeal, but is it not -possible that Minerva sometimes nods? Read this: - - “An attraction of the eminently respectable _Harper’s Weekly_ - will be a series of papers called ‘A Houseboat on the Styx’ - by Mr. Bangs of Yonkers. Nothing is sacred to this funny man. - Not content with taking his fling at the defunct majesty of - Napoleon he now proposes to take Pluto by the beard and make - copy of the pale shadows that throng the Stygian shores.” - -It may be so, but I did not know that Pluto had whiskers. And how does -Miss Boyce dispose of the legend concerning the smooth face and giddy -ways of old Mr. Pluto when he took to wife the young and blooming -Persephone? Charon wears a Vandyke as we well know; while Mephisto is -usually represented as clean-shaved or at best a moustache and goatee; -but hereafter I’ll never think of Pluto without calling up in mind Mr. -Peffer of Kansas. Go to, Fair Lady! think you because barber shops are -closed in York State on Sundays that they are shut in Hades all the week? -Next! - - * * * * * - -A lecturer on Egypt, telling the natives of Buffalo, N. Y., about the -marvels in stone built on that strip of mud, illustrated the proportions -of the Nile Valley by saying “It it eleven hundred miles long in Egypt -proper and seven miles wide for most of its length. If the city of -Buffalo were laid crosswise in the valley, it would bisect the kingdom.” -And a Rochester man who had strayed into the fold was mean enough to -add: “And if Buffalo was there, that’s the way it would lie—cross-ways.” -That’s the way they talk in Rochester. - - * * * * * - -I quote this paragraph from _Alice_ and respectfully refer it to the -editor of _Mlle New York_ with the hope that he can see the point as -plainly as he sees most things: - - All this time the Guard was looking at her, first through a - telescope, then through a microscope, and then through an opera - glass. At last he said, “You’re travelling the wrong way,” and - shut up the window and went away. - - * * * * * - -On his way to Montreal Mr. Hall Caine stopped off one day at East Aurora. -The Pink Tea given in his honor at the office of THE PHILISTINE was -largely attended by the farmers from both up the creek and down the -creek. In fact, as my old friend Billy McGlory used to say, “Ye cudden’t -see de street fer dust.” - - * * * * * - -The Boston _Commonwealth_ (what satire there is in that name!) is a nice -paper, but its editor has not smiled for forty years; and all of his -little writers carry so much culture that they are round-shouldered, -flat-chested, bow-legged and near-sighted. They belong to the large class -that invariably miss the point of things and use dignity for a mask to -hide their lack of a sense of fun. The _Commonwealth_ accuses us of -being envious of the _Chip-Munk_; of being violently prejudiced against -Mr. Cudahy’s book, and of speaking irreverently of Boston. Go to thou -old granny _Commonwealth_, why sit you like your grandsire carved in -alabaster and creep into the jaundice by being peevish? - - * * * * * - -The _Book-Peddler_ is doing great service in promotion of what passes -for literature in the paper and ink stores. I cannot but think what a -similar publication devoted to literature, not trade, could do to save -the valuable time of the reading public. Since Solomon’s time a good -many things have changed, but in one there is no improvement. “Of the -making of many books there is no end,” and that is a heap sadder than the -lamentation of Maud Muller and His Honor. - - * * * * * - -Concerning Mr. Grant Allen’s book and the manner in which its title has -been made the basis of several others more or less reminiscent, my most -valued correspondent writes me that the novelists are missing much by -not calling a story _The Woman Who Is Simply Dying To_. In my well known -philanthropic way I throw out this suggestion hoping that somebody may -make many dollars by the adoption of the title for a decadent tale. - - * * * * * - -The Vanastorbilts are really under great obligations to Mrs. Rorer’s -_Household News_ for the simple daily menus for poor folks which are a -feature. There’s nothing so cheap as good living—in a magazine. When -bread sticks and banana chutney and peaches and rice and cantaloupe -can be mowed away by a poor man before the seven o’clock whistle -blows no hard worker ought to lack muscle for his daily toil. We have -printed assurance of Mrs. Bellow that “These menus have been arranged -on a scientific plan, are thoroughly hygienic, and contain all that -is necessary for proper living.” It is luck after all that man does -not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the -hygienic mouth aforesaid. - - * * * * * - -Messrs. Lo & Behold, publishers of works on moral pathology, Boston, -are making great efforts to club the _Arena_. I understand they propose -offering season tickets to museums of morbid anatomy as prizes. - - * * * * * - -I note a somewhat guarded statement by Dr. Swan M. Burnett denying -that he and his wife have separated or are undergoing that mutually -humiliating process. All there is of it, he says, is that her work keeps -her abroad and his keeps him in Washington. The doctor’s friends say, -however, that the doctor and the writist live apart and have done so for -years and that he is tired of being referred to as Mrs. Frances Hodgson -Burnett’s husband. I think more likely he objects to being identified at -the banks and elsewhere as the father of Little Lord Fauntleroy. - - * * * * * - -The _Pell Mell Gazette_ of last Saturday contains a cablegram from Mr. -Hall Caine, dated at East Aurora, N. Y., wherein the author of _The -Manxman_ reports that the prospect for next year’s crop of ginger is very -promising. - - * * * * * - -I suppose it’s all right for the publisher of _Munsey’s_ to tell how he -made that magazine jump from 20,000 to half a million copies a month -by shutting out middlemen and reaching the hungering and thirsting -public direct. That’s his cue. If the publisher didn’t blow his horn -who would? I opine, however, that the fish would sell without it, and -that the editor of _Munsey’s_ could tell them something a good deal more -interesting in the same space. What does the great public, with its -multitude of aims and desires, care how such an effect was accomplished? -All that could safely remain within the veil. It would be more to the -point if the editor or publisher of Mr. Bok’s collection of wax works -would tell by what miracle he got a circulation. It is easy in the other -case, regardless of the smart publisher. The time passed long ago when a -horse being led to water could be forced to drink. The public must have -wanted _Munsey’s_ when it was shut out by the middleman or they wouldn’t -have compelled the dealers to send for it, and that implies that there’s -something in it besides self-consciousness and the publisher’s tactical -brilliancy. But how on earth came the embodied ego and its sisters and -cousins and aunts to get a hearing anywhere? Is Ruth Ashmore, _alias_ -Bab, at the bottom of it? - - * * * * * - -A certain gentleman of my acquaintance, having heard until he is sick of -it that it takes nine Taylors to make a man, continues to boldly assert -that it takes two Chatfields to make a Taylor. - - * * * * * - -When the PHILISTINE was started six months ago I had no idea that it -would now have half a million subscribers. - - * * * * * - -I am reminded by a Boston newspaper of the continued existence of a -belief that criticism of books and other things more or less remotely -connected with literature is largely a matter of prejudice and that the -imprints on title pages determine the authors’ fate. Yet the same article -goes on to quote the _Chip-Munk_ firm as proof that merit will win -sometimes in spite of such drawbacks. It seems to me the instance proves -too much. - - * * * * * - -And here, just at the last, I want to set down what I have just read -in a delightful book written by Katherine Cheever Meredith—Johanna -Staats—because it seems to fit one’s mood at this time of year. This is -it: - - “Oh, I play with Miss Gray Blanket and I play with Fanny.” - - “Fanny? The little girl?” - - “Yes. After it’s dark, you know, I play with her. Then I talk - to her. She never answers. But I play she’s so tired she can’t. - Of course I can’t play _that_ when it’s light. For then I could - _see_ that she wasn’t there. But in the dark she _might_ be.” - - “Exactly,” responded Poole abstractedly. He was thinking that - many men and women indulge in the same game. Sometimes with - their faith in each other; but more often, though, with their - creeds. - - - - -FANFARRONADE. - - - Let no man deem himself of Fate the King, - Or challenge Fortune with a voice defiant— - A tiny pebble in a shepherd’s sling - Once overthrew a proud and boastful giant. - - CLARENCE URMY. - - - - -NOTHING BUT LEAVES. - - -It was one of those November days when the wind swoops down the mountain -sides, bringing an avalanche of leaves—disked oak leaves—and then leaving -them for a moment in the valley basin, gathers them in her mighty hands -and tosses them again almost to the mountain tops. - -Chris found a sympathy in the dizzy, whirling, swirling leaves. His hopes -had withered so, and now a girl’s changeful hand had been as reckless -with him as was the wind with these: like wrath in death and envy -afterwards. - -Poor Chris’s spiritual kingdom was suffering the nature of an -insurrection, for though he loved her he was too proud to tell her she -had misjudged him. The dissipation of his hopes now was tinged with -regret, just as the wanton winds seem to us ruthless as we remember when -these leaves were planes and green, not disked and brown. - -Mockingly came the dance of leaves around his feet—each like a thing -alive—to beckon him here, there, to elude him, to laugh at him. - -“It’s too hard to bear!” groaned Chris, between his teeth. “How could she -believe it! How could she!” - -A flurry of hurrying, scurrying leaves swept past him, a company of -mocking, dancing leaves; from right and left they came, and scarce ten -steps before him they met and swirled up—up into a monstrous wraith with -beckoning hands. Chris’s conflict took form. “I’ll do it! I’ll do it! -I’ll show her! She’ll regret this day!” and he threw back his head and -with flashing eyes started forward with resolute steps. - -A lost leaf wavered, dipped, paused, then with a timid wafture touched -his crisp curls. - -His blood surged up, for it was like the caress of a loving hand. - -“Oh no,” said Chris, “I may be wrong—I’ll tell her so;” and holding the -lost leaf very gently between his two hands he walked swiftly back. - - HONOR EASTON. - - - - -[Illustration: A FLOWER FROM THE CENTURY PLANT. - -BY CHARLES DINNEH GIVES’EM. - -The Princess Stony-eye kept on saying nothing.] - -*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE PHILISTINE: A PERIODICAL OF -PROTEST (VOL. 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