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+This eBook, including all associated images, markup, improvements,
+metadata, and any other content or labor, has been confirmed to be
+in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES.
+
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+
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+status under the laws that apply to them.
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+Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for
+eBook #68384 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/68384)
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-The Project Gutenberg eBook of The Philistine: a periodical of
-protest (Vol. I, No. 4, September 1895), by Various
-
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and
-most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
-whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms
-of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at
-www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you
-will have to check the laws of the country where you are located before
-using this eBook.
-
-Title: The Philistine: a periodical of protest (Vol. I, No. 4, September
-       1895)
-
-Author: Various
-
-Release Date: June 23, 2022 [eBook #68384]
-
-Language: English
-
-Produced by: hekula03 and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at
-             https://www.pgdp.net (This book was produced from images
-             made available by the HathiTrust Digital Library.)
-
-*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE PHILISTINE: A PERIODICAL
-OF PROTEST (VOL. I, NO. 4, SEPTEMBER 1895) ***
-
-
-
-
-
-
-                              The Philistine
-                         A Periodical of Protest.
-
-            _I have peppered two of them: two I’m sure I have
-               paid, two rogues in buckram._—KING HENRY IV.
-
-                        [Illustration: No. Four.]
-
-                        Printed Every Little While
-                    for The Society of The Philistines
-                             and Published by
-                       Them Monthly. Subscription,
-                            One Dollar Yearly
-                Single Copies, 10 Cents. September, 1895.
-
-
-
-
-The Philistine.
-
-Edited by H. P. Taber.
-
-
-
-
-CONTENTS FOR SEPTEMBER, 1895.
-
-
-    The Birth of the Flower.      John Northern Hilliard
-
-    A Notable Work.                       Elbert Hubbard
-
-    The Manners Tart.                  Clara Cahill Park
-
-    A Matter of Background.             William McIntosh
-
-    In Slippery Places.                               W.
-
-    A Lantern Song.                        Stephen Crane
-
-    The Rubaiyat of O’Mara Khayvan.                W. M.
-
-    Notes.
-
-THE PHILISTINE is published monthly at $1 a year, 10 cents a single
-copy. Subscriptions may be left with newsdealers or sent direct to the
-publishers.
-
-Business communications should be addressed to THE PHILISTINE, East
-Aurora, New York. Matter intended for publication may be sent to the same
-address or to Box 6, Cambridge, Massachusetts.
-
-_Entered at the Postoffice at East Aurora, New York, for transmission as
-mail matter of the second class._
-
-_COPYRIGHT, 1895, by H. P. Taber._
-
-
-
-
-THE PHILISTINE.
-
-             NO. 4.         September, 1895.         VOL. 1.
-
-
-
-
-THE BIRTH OF THE FLOWER.
-
-
-    In the Beginning, God, the Great Workman,
-        Fashioned a seed;
-    Cunningly wrought it from waste-stuff left over
-        In building the stars;
-    Then, in the dust and the grime of His Workshop,
-        He rested and pondered—
-    Then, with a smile, flung the animate atom
-        Far into space.
-
-    As the seed fell through the blue of the heavens
-        Down to the world,
-    Wind, the Great Gardener, seized it in triumph
-        And bore it away;
-    Then, at a sign of the Master, who made it,
-        He planted the seed:—
-    Thus into life sprang the first of the flowers
-        On earth.
-
-                           —JOHN NORTHERN HILLIARD.
-
-
-
-
-A NOTABLE WORK.
-
-
-In Mr. Cudahy’s remarkable book entitled _The Pawns of Chance_ there are
-Sixteen Women who Did. Its sure success is prophesied on this account,
-for of the five novels that have made ten-strikes during the past year
-each has contained at least One Woman who Did, and in two instances
-Several.
-
-And right here, before referring further to Mr. Cudahy’s book, I wish to
-place on file a modest word of protest concerning the modern sex novel.
-
-Just now the stage and story-book seem to vie with one another in putting
-on parade the Men and Women who Did for the delectation of those who Have
-or May. The motif in all these books and plays is to depict the torturing
-emotions that wring and tear the hearts of these unhappy mortals. The
-Camp of Philistia does not boast that there are in it no People who Did,
-neither do we deny the reality of the heartaches and tears that come from
-unrequited love and affection placed not wisely. But from a somewhat
-limited experience in wordily affairs I arise to say that life does not
-consist entirely in these things, and furthermore that the importance
-given to the Folks who Have is quite out of proportion to their proper
-place with the procession. There are yet loves that are sweet and
-wholesome; there are still ambitions that are manly and strong. Let’s
-write and talk of these.
-
-But still even in spite of a morbid plot and many incidents that are
-rather bluggy, Mr. Cudahy has produced a work that probably will outsell
-any of the other volumes issued by Chicago’s Enterprising Decadent
-Publishers. This book has a few positive virtues. Evidently it is a
-collaboration. I think the author has employed some exceptionally bright
-apprentices and like Dumas the Elder, Mr. Cudahy is to be congratulated
-on the rare discrimination shown in choosing his help. In literature, as
-in commerce or war, much depends on selecting one’s aides: every good
-general must be properly reinforced.
-
-The prospectus of _The Pawns of Chance_ describes the binding of the book
-as “a symphony in pig-skin.” And the volume is certainly very pleasing
-to the eye. The paper is hand-made—deckle edge; the illustrations and
-etchings on Japan paper; and the portrait of the author that serves as
-frontispiece is a genuine work of art.
-
-The space in THE PHILISTINE at my disposal will not admit of an extended
-criticism, so I will briefly trace the plot, and make a few casual
-remarks on the more important situations, trusting that my readers will
-procure the work and each read for himself. For while its faults are
-many, yet there are here and there redeeming features, and in the moral
-at the close is a suggestion that is worth one’s while.
-
-Now for the story:
-
-James Hunks, known on the bills as Signor De June, was in 1875 proprietor
-of a Ballet Troupe. The corps de ballet consisted of sixteen ladies who
-were personally selected by Signor De June, and trained by him so that
-they performed some very wonderful terpsichorean evolutions. Eight of
-these women were blondes and eight brunettes. Surprising to state, none
-were over thirty and none under twenty years of age. But they were all
-Women who Did—that is to say, Ladies with a Past.
-
-Not that they were selected on this account; indeed, Signor De June
-did not interest himself in their Experiences—he only wanted form and
-intellect—but mostly form. Yet a coryphee must have brains, else she
-could not learn to conduct her airy shape through the mazy evolutions of
-the dance.
-
-But it came about by degrees that Signor De June learned that all of his
-ladies were Ladies with a History. And being a philosopher, he reasoned
-it out that the ballet was the only respectable calling that was open to
-a woman who had been the victim of misplaced love. Such is the bitter
-cruelty of a sham-virtuous society.
-
-And thus on page 141 Signor De June muses as follows: “Had my ladies been
-possessed of homely faces and crusty manners, no temptation could have
-come to them, and they would all have lived and died virtuous maidens; or
-at best been the contented (or discontented) wives of farmers, molders,
-bricklayers or mill hands. But being loving and gracious and sympathetic
-and withal beautiful, they have been unfortunate. Furthermore no woman
-should ever speak of her virtue unless she hates her husband and loves
-another man.”
-
-So Signor De June was very kind and gentle with these ladies—aye! tender.
-He loved them all; he guarded and shielded them from every fierce
-temptation. It was a pure paternal love—more properly Platonic. He only
-wished to make them happy—that was all.
-
-They gave exhibitions in the principal cities of the United States and
-were everywhere successful. Occasionally a husband or a former lover of
-one of these Women who Did would appear upon the scene, and whenever this
-happened the Signor, who was a large man and ambi-dextrous, would take
-the offender neck and crop and throw him out. This always cooled the most
-amorous follower, but it kept Signor De June quite busy. Yet it must
-not be thought that the Signor was brutal—far from it: all were welcome
-to worship his ladies, but it must be done from the parquette or dress
-circle.
-
-So they were all very prosperous and very happy, until one day the wife
-of Signor De June appeared and camped upon his trail. He had gotten an
-Indiana divorce from this woman five years before, but the courts had
-pronounced it invalid, and now she was upon him neck and crop, just as he
-had been upon the lovers and husbands. He tried to explain to her that
-he loved the Corps de Ballet, not the ladies individually. He loved them
-as a Whole, not singly. Moreover, his love was idyllic—Platonic. The
-wife explained that the thing did not exist except in books, and further
-stated her belief that the love was Plutonic if anything; and moreover it
-must cease.
-
-No doubt the woman really loved Mr. Hunks. He, too, had a little regard
-for her, although they quarrelled. But he was essentially commercial—a
-man of peace. He had no stomach for a legal battle with his wife’s
-attorneys, who had taken the case on speculation, and he could not run
-away. The woman utterly refused to be bought off for a reasonable sum,
-and she also declined joining the Ballet herself, in spite of De June’s
-assertions that he could love seventeen as well as sixteen, for in love
-capacity increases through use.
-
-“Try it for a month and you will see that it is Platonic,” said De June.
-
-“I’ve no doubt I’d find it so,” said the wife.
-
-She still was firm. He must choose between her and the Troupe. If he
-chose the Troupe he’d have her, like the poor, always with him. If he
-chose her alone she would still resemble the poverty stricken; but there
-would come times when vigilance might relax and he could slip a way.
-
-But what to do with the Troupe! He could not throw these beautiful,
-susceptible women on a struggling, seething, wicked world. He could not
-put them on a farm, for who would look after, correct, discipline and
-restrain them as he had done? If allowed to scatter they would marry, and
-marriage according to civilized methods, so-called, was a failure; had he
-not tried it?
-
-But De June was a man of resource (he was from Chicago). They were in
-Denver and women were scarce. He would select husbands for his ladies,
-himself.
-
-He did so, choosing sixteen strong fine young miners. Calling the men out
-one side, he made known to them his plan. Each man was to have a wife
-on payment of the trifling fee of two hundred dollars “matriculation”
-(_Sic_). The men were delighted—but had the ladies been consulted? No,
-that was not necessary—there was to be a return to primitive methods,
-which indeed were ever best: civilization was artificial, unnatural and
-corrupt.
-
-These sixteen ladies were all of fair intelligence, good hearted, able to
-work, willing to obey. More than that they had great capacity for loving,
-for had not this excess of love been their misfortune? The love only
-needed proper direction, like all of our other gifts.
-
-The sixteen gentlemen that the philosophic De June selected were of fair
-intelligence, healthy and good natured, prosperous and all men of fine
-physique. There was no choice in the men; there was no choice in the
-women; they were on the same intellectual plane—they were well mated
-and De June would not defeat the God of Chance by allowing any personal
-selection. One man offered a thousand dollars for first choice, but Mr.
-Hunks was a man of honor and could not be bought.
-
-The gentlemen were to be in the parquette. When the ladies appeared on
-the stage, at the word “Go” from De June, the sixteen men were to make a
-rush for the stage and each seize his future wife. All after the manner
-of the Romans who captured the Sabine women—and I guess the Roman Nation
-is not to be sneezed at! Cæsar, Antony, Brutus and all the rest of those
-honorable men were products of just such marriages.
-
-The rush was made—the women screamed, some fainted, but each man held
-his prize. The electric lights were turned off, the audience got out as
-best it could. Then the doors were locked, the curtain dropped and Signor
-De June stepped forward and in gentle words assured the sixteen ladies
-that no harm should come to them. All had been arranged for the best.
-They must be good honest wives, and the men must be good honest husbands,
-and Mr. Hunks, being a Justice of the Peace, declared them all man and
-wife—that is sixteen wives and sixteen husbands.
-
-The women, it must be confessed, had grown a trifle weary of the De June
-Idyllic Plan; and in the good old-fashioned womanly way, oft in the night
-season, each had confessed in her own heart, that one loving husband for
-each woman was what Nature intended. So they accepted the situation,
-and each began to use those winning ways that Herbert Spencer says are
-woman’s weapons: woman conquers through her intuition.
-
-At a word from De June the women repaired to their dressing rooms and
-soon appeared in customary feminine attire. This time the ladies had to
-pick their mates, for the change in dress greatly mystified the hirsute
-miners. There was a slight scramble among the ladies when three of them
-selected the same man, but the Signor soon brought order out of chaos.
-This scene, which occurs in chapter XXXIII, is quite dramatic.
-
-All being amicably settled De June gave each woman a chaste kiss on the
-cheek, shook hands with the grateful miners and went sorrowfully back
-(with his $3,200.00) to the hotel where his Mary Jane sat up awaiting him.
-
-That night Mr. Hunks and his wife left for Chicago. There he went into
-real estate and was very successful. Having resolved to face his fate,
-he treated Mary Jane as gently as he could and she repaid it all in
-kindness. So things were really not so bad as the Signor had imagined.
-
-Ten years passed and Mr. Hunks went back to Denver and found that the
-sixteen couples were living happily. Many little pledges had appeared to
-cement the bonds. All were content and perfectly mated, although several
-of the men were a bit henpecked—but a man soon gets used to such things.
-(See page 491, line 16). The women having had Experience were resolved to
-hold their new found mates with love’s own bonds; and the men fearing to
-lose such beautiful treasures were ever kind. There was a little doubt in
-the minds of all concerning De June’s commission as Justice of the Peace,
-and then certain requirements of the divorce courts had not been fully
-met, but these irregularities put all on their good behavior. For it is
-a fact that if a mortal knows that his mate cannot get away he is often
-severe and unreasonable.
-
-And the curious part of all this is that the story is true. Mr. Cudahy
-protests it on his honor, and declares that these sixteen worthy couples
-laid the foundation for the elite of Denver society, and are now the
-leading lights in that beautiful city.
-
-The story is somewhat marred by such ungrammatical expressions as “has
-came,” “shouldn’t ought,” etc. There are also a needless number of French
-and Latin phrases, culled from a lexicon I fear, and a striving after
-Latin derivatives. It is also a pity that more pains was not taken with
-the proof reading, as exasperating errors are on nearly every page. Still
-these are minor points.
-
-In the last four chapters there is considerable symbolism, which one
-cannot but wish had been put in plain English. Like Zangwill’s _The
-Master_, the moral is left for the last. It is a little clouded, but I
-take it that Mr. Cudahy believes that civilization’s plan of selection
-is very faulty. He suggests indirectly that Congress should appoint
-Matrimonial Commissioners for each district—men of discretion, experience
-and judgment. The Commissioner is to select from society sixteen
-marriageable young women and place them in a room, and then take a like
-number of young men and let them make a rush, and this, says Mr. Cudahy,
-would doubtless do away with many of our matrimonial misfits.
-
-Lovers of literature will look anxiously for Mr. Cudahy’s next book,
-and in the meantime I am sure that the Young Decadents will reap a rich
-harvest from _The Pawns of Chance_. I am in receipt of a letter from the
-distinguished author wherein he says that he is positively declining all
-invitations to lecture in the provinces, but that he may appear late in
-the season in a few of our principal cities.
-
-It may interest the Philistines to know that R. G. Dun & Co. rate Mr.
-Cudahy Z Z xxx 1, while Hobart Chatfield-Chatfield Taylor is only Y x 2
-3·4 and Mrs. Reginald De Koven ranks K x 4. At the present moment I can
-recall but two residents of Grub Street who have ratings so high as Mr.
-Cudahy, these being William Waldorf Astor and Walter Blackburn Harte.
-
-                                                           ELBERT HUBBARD.
-
-
-
-
-THE MANNERS TART.
-
-
-An old and worn out Tart once sat on the pantry shelf and as it dried and
-stiffened, thus it soliloquized: “In my youth men fought over me, not to
-possess me, but that each should pass me to his neighbor.
-
-“I was a fair Tart, greatly to be prized, but the manners of all were
-such that I was left alone on the table, the last of my kind, the
-Manners Tart, and they all withdrew, feigning indifference.
-
-“The cook, having made many of my brethren, cared not for me, so I,
-created to rejoice the soul of man, sit here, a cold and cheerless thing
-at which the rats gnaw nightly.
-
-“There was a little boy at the table, but why speak of him? He stretched
-out his hand for me, but detecting a slight frown between the eyebrows of
-his mother, he withdrew it and my chance was gone.
-
-“The little boy was the only one that sympathized with me; he knew that a
-Tart is short lived at best; that the only modest ambition of a Tart is
-to gladden some one in life and to overhear a few words of praise as it
-passes away.
-
-“But alas! I am a failure, and all because I move in a circle that makes
-a merit of self-sacrifice. I do not understand such things, but——”
-here a pang of mold struck to the Tart’s heart and it relapsed into
-unconsciousness.
-
-If it had understood it would have said—“there are many joys in the world
-that die unrejoiced over because no man will have the courage to do what
-he wants to do.”
-
-                                                        CLARA CAHILL PARK.
-
-DETROIT, August, 1895.
-
-
-
-
-A MATTER OF BACKGROUND.
-
-
-If the war in the extreme East just ended has done no more for humanity,
-it has demonstrated the unfitness in these days of a nation that has no
-perspective. Philosophers we have had, and eke reformers, who saw no
-farther than their noses. But here is a great people whose polity is
-exclusive, whose art recognizes no relation of distance, whose social
-code is rigidly formal and openly mercenary, whose methods in war
-consisted up to a late date of noise and stenches and hideous banners
-designed to frighten an enemy. With rare powers of detail, the art of
-China is lifeless and without spirituality or suggestive force. With
-centuries of training in literary industry, its lore is the elaborate
-repetition of didactic sayings thousands of years old. There is no
-background in its pictures. There is no constructive basis in its social
-theory. All is flat surface, repression, imitation. Yet here is the
-oldest nation in the world in continuous history. We need not wonder it
-has fallen at last. The marvel is that it stood so long. The student of
-history may well ask what has held back destroying hands through so many
-centuries of the world’s unrest.
-
-Lack of a sense of proportion and distance is not peculiar, however, to
-Orientals. Even in the light of western civilization philosophers have
-forgotten yesterday and to-morrow, and the foreground has usurped the
-canvas. Impatience is a sign of modern degeneration if the oracle who has
-a caveat on that warning is good authority. It is strange to find in the
-prophet himself the fault he attributes to our time. For in all ages the
-world has been on the point of going to the dogs, according to some voice
-crying in the wilderness or on the house tops, as he is crying now. From
-Jonah warning luxurious Nineveh down to Max Simon Nordau listing crooked
-ears as the breeder counts his cross-billed chicks as proof that the race
-is “running out,” the warning has been unceasing. And yet the race lives,
-and builds on its ruins.
-
-Our nerves have worn us out, according to Mr. Nordau. If Count Tolstoi
-knows, amatory passion is the cause of the wreck, and high feeding back
-of that. If Mr. Ibsen is right, artificiality has destroyed the virtues.
-M. Zola is sure that bestiality has brought judgment upon at least one
-modern Sodom. Mynheer Maartens is Philistine enough to ascribe most of
-our ills to repression of sincerity, of naturalness in social life. And
-so a score of doctors describe special symptoms, each empirically, each
-truthfully. The wisest of them—those who have a sense of perspective—see
-beyond the immediate ailment the persistent vitality which is never
-wholly conquered.
-
-We have specialized philosophy and literature as we have medicine.
-These are not quacks who tell us the world is going to wreck through
-the extravagances of society, through the repression of humanities,
-through the lusts of gross living. They are students of particular phases
-of distemper. The world, not the men in its clinics, is to blame when
-it hails each as a cure-all. The realism of a Zola or a Nordau is not
-a finality. While the knife is in hand the ulcer is pre-eminently in
-evidence. Its removal is the business in order. But the genius of a Zola
-that divines the cancer in the vitals of society presupposes the life
-that is behind it—and that is the main factor in his surgery.
-
-He would be a false teacher who should put the immediate in the place
-of the permanent in any such calculation. The world that listens has an
-equal responsibility. The greatest artist can only paint passing phases
-of the limitless evolution going on about him. It is heresy in itself
-fatal to put a phase in the place of the infinite process. Grant that
-society is always at war with itself, always repressing truth, always
-promoting animalism by its very more or less disguises. The paradox of
-these results can never be wholly escaped. The teacher who sees what is
-and was in due proportion will judge what is to be, though no son of a
-prophet. The new realism for which Philistines contend is no expose of
-the evils of modern society, no uncovering of a witch’s pot. It holds all
-these manifestations in perspective, but substitutes none of them for
-a general view of life and human destiny. It would make health instead
-of disease infectious, substituting for blind Oriental imitation a
-truer standard of custom, freer from convention that has no warrant of
-purpose, more direct in its expression of natural and normal vitality
-in personal living and thinking. “From within outward,” is its motto.
-It would depose and outgrow self-consciousness—the vampire fungus that
-signalizes arrested development and decay in thought or in letters or in
-the self-projection of social life. The realism of the Philistines is
-manifested in the recognition of healthy life that we find in some of the
-new literature—in the heroic romance of Anthony Hope, in the charming
-tenderness and sweetness of Maartens’s Hollandais and in the fresh-witted
-islanders, full of arterial blood, of Hall Caine and the wizard who lies
-buried on the mountain top of his own beloved island—that second one to
-the left after you leave San Francisco.
-
-Even the modern stage, corrupted by French intensities and the commercial
-idea of filling the house, is showing signs of a reaction. Not more than
-nine-tenths of the standard attractions of the coming season are based on
-infractions of the seventh commandment or of that similar law which every
-chivalrous man knows, though it was never traced in fire on the Sinaitic
-stone.
-
-                                                         WILLIAM MCINTOSH.
-
-
-
-
-IN SLIPPERY PLACES.
-
-    “Publish it not in the streets of Askelon lest the daughters of
-    THE PHILISTINES rejoice.”
-
-
-The publishers of the _Chap Book_ of July 15th have kept their promise
-to furnish original matter in one way perhaps not contemplated when they
-made mention of that booklet in their catalogue.
-
-We can rest assured that Tacitus never wrote “emperasset” in the sentence
-quoted on page 174; we shall be slow to believe that the author of _The
-Children of the Ghetto_, in confusion of mind was referring empire and
-empirical to a common origin, mixing up the sons of Aeneas and Danaos
-after the fashion of Little Buttercup.
-
-With perhaps a trifle less confidence we may acquit him of dragging into
-notice as a prominent name in English letters the hitherto obscure or
-wholly mythical “Carlysle,” who figures on page 177. But in excusing the
-writer from the fatherhood of these literary foundlings we are compelled
-to look to the publishers or at least to their proof-reader as the
-responsible man, a sense of decency no less than the requirements of this
-metaphor, repudiates the suggestion that he might after all turn out to
-be a woman, and whether the reproach belong at the door of the principals
-or of the workman is quite immaterial to us, the house must stand the
-breakage of glassware, not the bartender.
-
-A matter of two typographical errors within the space of a single short
-article may seem but trifling subject for comment in a world where the
-surest footed at times slip, but one or two considerations make even such
-venial sins fit objects for animadversion. The publishers of the little
-fortnightly, in the manner of their issues if not in so many words,
-set themselves up, in a fashion, as guides in the matter of literary
-elegance, it behooves them therefore to take heed that the unwary be
-not led astray. “Who drives fat oxen should himself be fat,” nor should
-the venerable name of Caxton be made a laughing-stock in the mouths of
-scoffers.
-
-                                                                        W.
-
-SAN FRANCISCO, August, 1895.
-
-       *       *       *       *       *
-
-TO MARK TWAIN: I am awfully sorry you have lost all your money. I am in
-the same boat, but let’s not talk about it all the time.
-
-
-
-
-A LANTERN SONG.
-
-
-    EACH SMALL GLEAM WAS A VOICE
-    —A LANTERN VOICE—
-    IN LITTLE SONGS OF CARMINE, VIOLET, GREEN, GOLD.
-    A CHORUS OF COLORS CAME OVER THE WATER,
-    THE WONDROUS LEAF-SHADOWS NO LONGER WAVERED,
-    NO PINES CROONED ON THE HILLS,
-    THE BLUE NIGHT WAS ELSEWHERE A SILENCE
-    WHEN THE CHORUS OF COLORS CAME OVER THE WATER,
-    LITTLE SONGS OF CARMINE, VIOLET, GREEN, GOLD.
-
-    SMALL GLOWING PEBBLES
-    THROWN ON THE DARK PLANE OF EVENING
-    SING GOOD BALLADS OF GOD
-    AND ETERNITY, WITH SOUL’S REST.
-    LITTLE PRIESTS, LITTLE HOLY FATHERS,
-    NONE CAN DOUBT THE TRUTH OF YOUR HYMNING
-    WHEN THE MARVELOUS CHORUS COMES OVER THE WATER,
-    SONGS OF CARMINE, VIOLET, GREEN, GOLD.
-
-                                     STEPHEN CRANE.
-
-
-
-
-THE RUBAIYAT OF O’MARA KHAYVAN.
-
-ERIN (IRAN?) YEAR OF THE HEGIRA 94—VIA BROOKLYN.
-
-
-    Wake! for the night that lets poor man forget
-    His daily toil is past, and in Care’s net
-      Another day is caught to gasp and fade;
-    Oh, but my weary bones are heavy yet!
-
-    Wake! son of kings that bears a hod on high,
-    And builds the world. The red sun mounts the sky
-      And circles squares in the cot’s every chink
-    And gilds ephemeral motes that whirl and die.
-
-    Wake! for the bearded goat devours the door!
-    And now the family pig forbears to snore,
-      And from his trough sets up the Persian’s cry—
-    “Eat! drink! To-morrow we shall be no more!”
-
-    Eat, drink and sleep! Aye, eat and sleep who can!
-    I work and ache. The beast outstrips the man;
-      And when oblivion bids the sequence end,
-    Which shall we say has best filled nature’s plan?
-
-    When on Gowanus’ hills the whistle blows
-    What dreams are mine of Hafiz’ wine-red rose?
-      And when I drag my leaden feet toward home
-    No sensuous bulbul note woos to repose.
-
-    I envy the dull brute my hand shall slay.
-    He lifts no stolid eye above the clay.
-      I, longing, on the cloud-banked verge discern
-    “Unborn To-morrow and dead Yesterday.”
-
-    What is the Cup to lips that may not drain?
-    Or fleeting joy to lives conceived in pain?
-      Toil and aspire is still the common lot,
-    Stumbling to rise and rising fall again.
-
-    And is this all? Shall skies no longer shine,
-    Or stars lure on to themes that seem divine?
-      Ah, Maker of the Tents! is this thy hope—
-    To feed and grovel and to die like swine?
-
-                                           W. M.
-
-
-
-
-SIDE TALKS WITH THE PHILISTINES: BEING SUNDRY BITS OF WISDOM WHICH HAVE
-BEEN HERETOFORE SECRETED, AND ARE NOW SET FORTH IN PRINT.
-
-
-To Robert Cameron Rogers: You are keeping the stage waiting.
-
-       *       *       *       *       *
-
-My friend with the Sharp Scissors which edit the Table Talk column
-of the Buffalo _Commercial_ had a few words to say the other evening
-regarding success. He alleged that Mr. Bok and Richard Harding Davis were
-successful men, and that it was the pleasure of unsuccessful people to
-jump on them mercilessly. I dislike to disagree with Mr. Quilp, but it
-seems to me that he belongs to that class of people who habitually miss
-the point of things.
-
-The story in _Gil Blas_ of the strolling player—true to what he deemed
-his art—working with commendable if misdirected energy, walking from town
-to town, and as he walked soaking his dry crusts in the water of wayside
-wells—this were a story of success. Success, it seems to me, lies not so
-much in having one’s name a commonplace among this great American public,
-which falls down to worship mediocrity if it is well advertised, as in
-doing one’s day’s work honestly and sincerely. To sing a song that finds
-its way into the hearts of men; to act a part that helps another toward
-his happiness, and do it all without blare of trumpets and jangle of
-hurdy-gurdy; and then walk on to the next town, stopping by the roadside
-wells to soak a dry crust in cool water, or, perhaps, a fresh cake in
-a mug of Bass as occasion served, and then, at the end, to lie down
-quietly, listening to the singing by the people of one’s own songs—though
-they know it not—presents a picture of a perfect harmony. This is the
-preachment of Stevenson and of men before him, and until a better one may
-be advanced this will serve. I would rather have written _The Pavilion
-on the Links_ than _Successward_, or even Mr. Davis’s masterpiece, _Van
-Bibber and the Swan Boats_. Still, it is a matter of taste, and if one
-likes lactated food, roast mutton is bad for his stomach.
-
-       *       *       *       *       *
-
-According to the prospectus Mr. Cudahy’s book fairly bristles with
-epigram: the bristles alone are said to be worth the money.
-
-       *       *       *       *       *
-
-Probably Lawrence Hutton knows more about death masks than any living
-man. I cheerfully grant him this honor, but when he writes the
-advertising pages in _Harper’s_ and springs them on an unsuspecting
-public as “Literary Notes,” I rebel. Rebellion is not, however, confined
-to mere objection to his sailing under false colors, but to such
-sentences as these from a recent number of _Harper’s_:
-
-    “_Beyond the Dreams of Avarice_ is not as _amusing_ as an
-    entertaining story, but it is intensely interesting from
-    beginning to end. No one who picks it up for an evening’s
-    _amusement_ will be likely to lay it down unfinished or to lay
-    it aside for any other form of current _entertainment_.”
-
-The italics are mine, and are put in simply to emphasize the occult
-meaning of Mr. Hutton, who belongs to the class which assumes to set the
-literary pace of the world. I doubt if Brander Matthews could do worse.
-
-       *       *       *       *       *
-
-The portrait of Mr. Cudahy that is used as a frontispiece in his new book
-is a photograph from the original chromo, signed by the electrotyper.
-
-       *       *       *       *       *
-
-It is reported to me that quite a large section of the Metropolitan
-colony sing their jubilate this way: “It is Howells that hath made us and
-not we ourselves—We are his people and the sheep of his pasture.”
-
-       *       *       *       *       *
-
-“Papa,” said the smart boy at dinner, “does consomme mean consumed?”
-
-“No, my son,” said the philologic pa, “consomme is from a Latin word,
-_summum_—all—and comes to us via the French. It means ‘all together’—the
-same as the Trilby pose.” And there was silence for the space of four
-seconds.
-
-       *       *       *       *       *
-
-Somebody has sent me the prospectus of a magazine shortly to be published
-in Cincinnati. In spite of rumors to the contrary THE PHILISTINE will
-continue publication. Even _The Century_, although frightened, will let
-advertising contracts as heretofore. THE PHILISTINE, and supposedly
-other magazines, base their hopes of a longer existence not on their
-equal worth—for lo! it is but timorously we draw breath after reading
-this prospectus—but knowing that the new magazine will be keyed to so
-exquisite a pitch of literary supremacy that only a few from the world
-erudite may revel in such a rarified atmosphere. The birth of the
-periodical—from the prospectus—fittingly closes this momentous era.
-Evolution, hitherto satisfied with minute gradations, now forges ahead
-in a stupendous leap; we are diatoms, we scratch rudely on bones, and
-live in caves; we still bag the mastodon with embryonic pitfall, we shave
-with a shell and are only paleozoic microbes in a literary miocene age.
-We are mental fossils clogged in stratified oblivion—but we can’t help
-it, we are rudimentary and still possess some basal instincts such as
-love, religion, love of beauty and the like. But we never imagined how
-infinitesimal we were until the coming of that fatal prospectus. Now we
-realize that the groaning of the world, the extraordinary upheaval of the
-age, the quickening of the leaven, the quaking of the Zeit Gheist were
-but the premonitory travaillings of eternity before the awful nativity of
-this infant from Over-the-Rhine. The veil of our temple is rent and our
-suspenders are in hock. Mighty Spirit of the æons have mercy on us! we
-are worms! moribund, senile old things. Our ears are sessile, yet we hear
-the portents. In this hackneyed, conventional, sterile age somebody is
-going to be original! Prostrate we make obeisance. Spare us Original that
-is to be—spare us! But who t’ell started this Literary Fresh Air Fund,
-anyway?
-
-       *       *       *       *       *
-
-“Three generations from the soil” may be a good rule of social
-eligibility after all. I know a family in one of our great lake cities
-which has ruled society therein for half a lifetime and it is only two
-removes from the mud. But savagery will crop out now and then, despite
-all the austerities of social custom and the perpetual effort to reach
-the calm of Nirvana and look as if life was a doosid bore. The delight
-of these, as of all savages, is to astonish the natives. When it can be
-done by driving a loping team of circus horses down the chief avenue of
-the city, that suffices. Another pet trick is to mass the family on the
-porch of the wooden-castled mansion on a Sunday morning and take their
-pictures in group, in full view of worshippers returning from church. The
-suggestion of a Ute reservation at such times is complete. When these
-fail to create a sensation, a yellow tally-ho driven madly through the
-narrowest streets of the Quartier Teuton, scattering dogs and babies,
-with whoops and horns and the mottled circus horses in the lead, does the
-business. It isn’t so long since the richest of our American nobility
-showed the craven blood of the materialistic sons of the bush, to whom
-brute life is everything. The American-English duel that failed is still
-an unpleasant memory. I mention these things only to illustrate the
-paradox of our days. We do labor hard to get rid of the joy of living
-and we call the new state culture and repose, when we get it. But the
-storage of force is a poor thing. It breaks out in abnormal ways and the
-acquisitive father is punished in his degenerate children to the third
-and fourth generation sometimes—and usually to the second.
-
-       *       *       *       *       *
-
-I have received the second volume of _Moods_, which my Philadelphia
-correspondent calls _Sulks_. It is a retrograde from the first number in
-that in some places the printing is on both sides of the leaf. I had hope
-that _Moods_ would continue its good work and in the second number leave
-both sides blank. As it is, however, I commend the first volume to that
-eminent figurer, Mr. Edward Atkinson of Boston, who may use the blank
-sides upon which to calculate what the other pages are good for. By the
-way, the announcement of the second volume contains a description of the
-type used, which is a reprint of the typefounder’s circular concerning
-the Jenson type. I would imagine that some of the geniuses of _Moods_
-could have at least written an original circular. The prospectus of the
-second volume contains a list of one hundred and seventeen stars—geniuses
-of the first magnitude—still as my friend of the _Picayune_ says, “Though
-they twinkle, twinkle, twinkle, we wonder what they are.”
-
-       *       *       *       *       *
-
-If McClure can give us more such exquisite stories as the Zenda tale
-in the August number, a good deal of reminiscent literature and living
-documents may be pardoned. Hope is better than memory, Mr. McClure.
-
-       *       *       *       *       *
-
-Mr. Frank A. Munsey, who prints a picture book, of which eleven million
-copies are sold every four weeks, declares in a shrill, throaty falsetto
-that American literature at present is so and so; and that in the future
-he proposes to have it _so_. Mr. Oppenheimer of Rochester has not yet
-been heard from.
-
-       *       *       *       *       *
-
-I hope no one suspects me of any disrespect toward Mr. Ham Garland of the
-Chicago Stock Yards, heretofore noticed in these columns. A correspondent
-reminds me that Mr. G. is favorably mentioned in the oldest records. The
-historian of the creation remarks “And Ham was the father of Canaan.”
-
-       *       *       *       *       *
-
-Chicago’s _Echo_ should be successful. It is taking from the foreign
-periodicals their very best of picturings and giving us a taste of the
-delightful fun of _Fliegende Blætter_, _La Rire_, and the rest—a fun
-which somehow we cannot produce in America, so _Puck’s_ artists and those
-of _Judge_ and a few others borrow the ideas and we pat ourselves on the
-back and say what a keen sense of humor we have. We are very funny—we
-Americans—funnier, by long odds, than we think. I notice, too, that _The
-Echo_ knows another good thing when it sees it, so the editors have
-made the printers use my pet grape leaves for the beginnings of their
-paragraphs. For this compliment to my taste I thank _The Echo_.
-
-       *       *       *       *       *
-
-What we are coming to in poetry is always a fascinating theme—like biking
-in the dark on a strange road. But what we are going away from is more
-satisfactory to contemplate. It is pleasant to think that Homer, the
-blind minstrel, and Omar, the tent maker, are fixed facts. They are the
-poles of verse—one standing for the heroic and romantic, self-unconscious
-and buoyant, the other for vampire introspection and fatalism which
-mistakes interior darkness for an eclipse of the universe. It is also
-consoling to know that such poetry as Francis Saltus Saltus’s “Dreams
-After Sunset” and Duncan Campbell Scott’s yawp in the August number has
-been written—for they won’t have to be written again.
-
-       *       *       *       *       *
-
-Judge Grant, in commenting on the ways of the Summer Girl in the July
-_Scribner’s_, says that after her return to her own particular vine and
-fig-tree she has, among other perplexities, “a considerable uncertainty
-in her mind as _to whom she is engaged to_.” This is in form somewhat
-similar to the reporter who said the victim of the trolley accident was
-killed fatally dead.
-
-       *       *       *       *       *
-
-According to Mr. F. Hopkinson Smith, who parts his name in the middle and
-therefore ought to know, “Abbey in his art really has done what Wagner
-has done in music, Tennyson and the poets in verse.” He says so in the
-current _Scribner’s_. Tennyson “and” the poets is so kind—with accent on
-the “so.” The author of “Locksley Hall” ought to come back to Lily Dale
-or somewhere and thank Mr. Hopsmith.
-
-       *       *       *       *       *
-
-The style of whiskers formerly called “Dundreary,” is now known as “The
-Wind in the Clearing.”
-
-       *       *       *       *       *
-
-I have received from the Department of Agriculture an envelope labelled
-“Official Business—Penalty for Private Use $300.” Stamped across the face
-in red ink is the autograph of Hon. D. N. Lockwood. Inside this envelope
-was one still smaller which bore this inscription:
-
-    +----------------------------------------+
-    |    U. S. Department of Agriculture.    |
-    |                                        |
-    |             FORGET-ME-NOT.             |
-    |                                        |
-    |                 Blue.                  |
-    |                                        |
-    |   A half-hardy perennial. It prefers   |
-    | a moist situation, is easily grown and |
-    | blooms early.                          |
-    +----------------------------------------+
-
-If I remember correctly Mr. Lockwood Ran for something during last fall’s
-campaign. I wonder what he is going to Run for next that he wishes to be
-remembered.
-
-       *       *       *       *       *
-
-New York rejoices in the possession of a magazine for rich people. It is
-called _Form_, and it tells all about the first families—Knickerbockers
-and others—and what they do to be decent. I understand it proposes
-to offer prizes after the manner of Judge Tourgee’s _Basis_ for the
-cleverest paraphrase of the second verse in Genesis. The historian of
-creation declares that on the first day “the earth was without _Form_,
-and void.” It’s a great “ad.”
-
-       *       *       *       *       *
-
-    In
-    Praising poetry of William Morris
-    And Stephen Crane
-    Were you poking fun?
-    I hope ’twas so:
-    For
-    You must perceive
-    That those slashed and mangled lines
-    Do no more resemblance bear
-    To true poetry
-    Than hacked and shattered corpse
-    On battle field
-    Bears
-    To a perfect man,
-    Whose form divinely fair
-    Fitly enfolds feelings consummate
-    Against such lines—
-    And in fact ’gainst all your verse,
-    I do
-    Protest.
-
-                          NELSON AYRES.
-
-NEW ORLEANS, Aug. 15, ’95.
-
-       *       *       *       *       *
-
-[Illustration]
-
-At the Publishers’ Convention recently held in San Francisco the
-delegates were treated to a steamboat ride down the bay where a picnic
-was held. Police were on hand to see that the delegates did not all rush
-down a steep place into the sea and perish in the waters.
-
-*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE PHILISTINE: A PERIODICAL OF
-PROTEST (VOL. I, NO. 4, SEPTEMBER 1895) ***
-
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-<p style='text-align:center; font-size:1.2em; font-weight:bold'>The Project Gutenberg eBook of The Philistine: a periodical of protest (Vol. I, No. 4, September 1895), by Various</p>
-<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'>
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and
-most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
-whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms
-of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online
-at <a href="https://www.gutenberg.org">www.gutenberg.org</a>. If you
-are not located in the United States, you will have to check the laws of the
-country where you are located before using this eBook.
-</div>
-
-<p style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:1em; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Title: The Philistine: a periodical of protest (Vol. I, No. 4, September 1895)</p>
-<p style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:0; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Author: Various</p>
-<p style='display:block; text-indent:0; margin:1em 0'>Release Date: June 23, 2022 [eBook #68384]</p>
-<p style='display:block; text-indent:0; margin:1em 0'>Language: English</p>
-  <p style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:0; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em; text-align:left'>Produced by: hekula03 and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at https://www.pgdp.net (This book was produced from images made available by the HathiTrust Digital Library.)</p>
-<div style='margin-top:2em; margin-bottom:4em'>*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE PHILISTINE: A PERIODICAL OF PROTEST (VOL. I, NO. 4, SEPTEMBER 1895) ***</div>
-
-<div class="max30">
-
-<p class="center larger"><span class="larger">The Philistine</span><br />
-A Periodical of Protest.</p>
-
-<div class="subhead">
-
-<p><i>I have peppered two of them: two I’m sure I have
-paid, two rogues in buckram.</i>—<span class="smcap">King Henry IV.</span></p>
-
-</div>
-
-<div class="figleft">
-<img src="images/cover-issue4.jpg" width="160" height="200" alt="No. Four." />
-</div>
-
-<p class="noindent">Printed Every Little While
-for The Society of The Philistines
-and Published by
-Them Monthly. Subscription,
-One Dollar Yearly
-<img class="inline" src="images/cover-deco2.jpg" alt="" />
-<img class="inline" src="images/cover-deco2.jpg" alt="" />
-<img class="inline" src="images/cover-deco2.jpg" alt="" /></p>
-
-<p class="noindent">Single Copies, 10 Cents. September, 1895.
-<img class="inline" src="images/cover-deco2.jpg" alt="" />
-<img class="inline" src="images/cover-deco2.jpg" alt="" />
-<img class="inline" src="images/cover-deco2.jpg" alt="" />
-<img class="inline" src="images/cover-deco2.jpg" alt="" />
-<img class="inline" src="images/cover-deco2.jpg" alt="" />
-<img class="inline" src="images/cover-deco2.jpg" alt="" /></p>
-
-</div>
-
-<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" />
-
-<div class="chapter">
-
-<h1>THE PHILISTINE.</h1>
-
-<p class="center">Edited by H. P. Taber.</p>
-
-<h2 class="nobreak">CONTENTS FOR SEPTEMBER, 1895.</h2>
-
-</div>
-
-<table>
-  <tr>
-    <td class="tdl"><a href="#THE_BIRTH_OF_THE_FLOWER">The Birth of the Flower.</a></td>
-  </tr>
-  <tr>
-    <td class="tdr">John Northern Hilliard</td>
-  </tr>
-  <tr>
-    <td class="tdl"><a href="#A_NOTABLE_WORK">A Notable Work.</a></td>
-  </tr>
-  <tr>
-    <td class="tdr">Elbert Hubbard</td>
-  </tr>
-  <tr>
-    <td class="tdl"><a href="#THE_MANNERS_TART">The Manners Tart.</a></td>
-  </tr>
-  <tr>
-    <td class="tdr">Clara Cahill Park</td>
-  </tr>
-  <tr>
-    <td class="tdl"><a href="#A_MATTER_OF_BACKGROUND">A Matter of Background.</a></td>
-  </tr>
-  <tr>
-    <td class="tdr">William McIntosh</td>
-  </tr>
-  <tr>
-    <td class="tdl"><a href="#IN_SLIPPERY_PLACES">In Slippery Places.</a></td>
-  </tr>
-  <tr>
-    <td class="tdr">W.</td>
-  </tr>
-  <tr>
-    <td class="tdl"><a href="#A_LANTERN_SONG">A Lantern Song.</a></td>
-  </tr>
-  <tr>
-    <td class="tdr">Stephen Crane</td>
-  </tr>
-  <tr>
-    <td class="tdl"><a href="#THE_RUBAIYAT_OF_OMARA_KHAYVAN">The Rubaiyat of O’Mara Khayvan.</a></td>
-  </tr>
-  <tr>
-    <td class="tdr">W. M.</td>
-  </tr>
-  <tr>
-    <td class="tdl"><a href="#SIDE_TALKS_WITH_THE_PHILISTINES">Notes.</a></td>
-  </tr>
-</table>
-
-<div class="max30">
-
-<p><span class="smcap">The Philistine</span> is published monthly at $1 a
-year, 10 cents a single copy. Subscriptions may be
-left with newsdealers or sent direct to the publishers.</p>
-
-<p>Business communications should be addressed to
-<span class="smcap">The Philistine</span>, East Aurora, New York. Matter
-intended for publication may be sent to the same
-address or to Box 6, Cambridge, Massachusetts.</p>
-
-<p class="center"><i>Entered at the Postoffice at East Aurora, New York, for transmission
-as mail matter of the second class.</i></p>
-
-<p class="noindent"><i>COPYRIGHT, 1895, by H. P. Taber.</i></p>
-
-</div>
-
-<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" />
-
-<div class="chapter">
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_105"></a>[105]</span></p>
-
-<h2 class="nobreak">THE PHILISTINE.</h2>
-
-</div>
-
-<div class="subhead">
-
-<p class="center"><span class="allsmcap">NO. 4.</span> <span class="spacer">September, 1895.</span> <span class="allsmcap">VOL. 1.</span></p>
-
-</div>
-
-<div class="chapter">
-
-<h2 class="nobreak" id="THE_BIRTH_OF_THE_FLOWER">THE BIRTH OF THE FLOWER.</h2>
-
-</div>
-
-<div class="poetry-container">
-<div class="poetry">
-  <div class="stanza">
-    <div class="verse indent0">In the Beginning, God, the Great Workman,</div>
-    <div class="verse indent4">Fashioned a seed;</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">Cunningly wrought it from waste-stuff left over</div>
-    <div class="verse indent4">In building the stars;</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">Then, in the dust and the grime of His Workshop,</div>
-    <div class="verse indent4">He rested and pondered—</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">Then, with a smile, flung the animate atom</div>
-    <div class="verse indent4">Far into space.</div>
-  </div>
-  <div class="stanza">
-    <div class="verse indent0">As the seed fell through the blue of the heavens</div>
-    <div class="verse indent4">Down to the world,</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">Wind, the Great Gardener, seized it in triumph</div>
-    <div class="verse indent4">And bore it away;</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">Then, at a sign of the Master, who made it,</div>
-    <div class="verse indent4">He planted the seed:—</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">Thus into life sprang the first of the flowers</div>
-    <div class="verse indent4">On earth.</div>
-  </div>
-  <div class="stanza">
-    <div class="verse right">—<span class="smcap">John Northern Hilliard.</span></div>
-  </div>
-</div>
-</div>
-
-<div class="figcenter">
-<img src="images/deco1.jpg" width="30" height="30" alt="" />
-</div>
-
-<div class="chapter">
-
-<h2 class="nobreak" id="A_NOTABLE_WORK">A NOTABLE WORK.</h2>
-
-</div>
-
-<div>
-<img class="dropcap" src="images/dropcap-i.jpg" width="50" height="60" alt="" />
-</div>
-
-<p class="dropcap">In Mr. Cudahy’s remarkable book entitled
-<i>The Pawns of Chance</i> there are Sixteen Women
-who Did. Its sure success is prophesied on this account,
-for of the five novels that have made ten-strikes<span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_106"></a>[106]</span>
-during the past year each has contained at least One
-Woman who Did, and in two instances Several.</p>
-
-<p>And right here, before referring further to Mr.
-Cudahy’s book, I wish to place on file a modest word
-of protest concerning the modern sex novel.</p>
-
-<p>Just now the stage and story-book seem to vie with
-one another in putting on parade the Men and
-Women who Did for the delectation of those who
-Have or May. The motif in all these books and
-plays is to depict the torturing emotions that wring
-and tear the hearts of these unhappy mortals. The
-Camp of Philistia does not boast that there are in it
-no People who Did, neither do we deny the reality
-of the heartaches and tears that come from unrequited
-love and affection placed not wisely. But from a
-somewhat limited experience in wordily affairs I arise
-to say that life does not consist entirely in these
-things, and furthermore that the importance given to
-the Folks who Have is quite out of proportion to
-their proper place with the procession. There are
-yet loves that are sweet and wholesome; there are
-still ambitions that are manly and strong. Let’s
-write and talk of these.</p>
-
-<p>But still even in spite of a morbid plot and many
-incidents that are rather bluggy, Mr. Cudahy has
-produced a work that probably will outsell any of the
-other volumes issued by Chicago’s Enterprising Decadent<span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_107"></a>[107]</span>
-Publishers. This book has a few positive virtues.
-Evidently it is a collaboration. I think the
-author has employed some exceptionally bright apprentices
-and like Dumas the Elder, Mr. Cudahy
-is to be congratulated on the rare discrimination
-shown in choosing his help. In literature, as in commerce
-or war, much depends on selecting one’s
-aides: every good general must be properly reinforced.</p>
-
-<p>The prospectus of <i>The Pawns of Chance</i> describes
-the binding of the book as “a symphony in pig-skin.”
-And the volume is certainly very pleasing to
-the eye. The paper is hand-made—deckle edge;
-the illustrations and etchings on Japan paper; and
-the portrait of the author that serves as frontispiece is
-a genuine work of art.</p>
-
-<p>The space in <span class="smcap">The Philistine</span> at my disposal will
-not admit of an extended criticism, so I will briefly
-trace the plot, and make a few casual remarks on
-the more important situations, trusting that my
-readers will procure the work and each read for
-himself. For while its faults are many, yet there are
-here and there redeeming features, and in the moral
-at the close is a suggestion that is worth one’s while.</p>
-
-<p>Now for the story:</p>
-
-<p>James Hunks, known on the bills as Signor De
-June, was in 1875 proprietor of a Ballet Troupe.<span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_108"></a>[108]</span>
-The corps de ballet consisted of sixteen ladies who
-were personally selected by Signor De June, and
-trained by him so that they performed some very
-wonderful terpsichorean evolutions. Eight of these
-women were blondes and eight brunettes. Surprising
-to state, none were over thirty and none under
-twenty years of age. But they were all Women who
-Did—that is to say, Ladies with a Past.</p>
-
-<p>Not that they were selected on this account; indeed,
-Signor De June did not interest himself in
-their Experiences—he only wanted form and intellect—but
-mostly form. Yet a coryphee must have
-brains, else she could not learn to conduct her airy
-shape through the mazy evolutions of the dance.</p>
-
-<p>But it came about by degrees that Signor De
-June learned that all of his ladies were Ladies with a
-History. And being a philosopher, he reasoned it out
-that the ballet was the only respectable calling that
-was open to a woman who had been the victim of
-misplaced love. Such is the bitter cruelty of a sham-virtuous
-society.</p>
-
-<p>And thus on page 141 Signor De June muses as
-follows: “Had my ladies been possessed of homely
-faces and crusty manners, no temptation could have
-come to them, and they would all have lived and
-died virtuous maidens; or at best been the contented
-(or discontented) wives of farmers, molders, bricklayers<span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_109"></a>[109]</span>
-or mill hands. But being loving and gracious
-and sympathetic and withal beautiful, they have been
-unfortunate. Furthermore no woman should ever
-speak of her virtue unless she hates her husband and
-loves another man.”</p>
-
-<p>So Signor De June was very kind and gentle
-with these ladies—aye! tender. He loved them all;
-he guarded and shielded them from every fierce temptation.
-It was a pure paternal love—more properly
-Platonic. He only wished to make them happy—that
-was all.</p>
-
-<p>They gave exhibitions in the principal cities of the
-United States and were everywhere successful. Occasionally
-a husband or a former lover of one of these
-Women who Did would appear upon the scene, and
-whenever this happened the Signor, who was a
-large man and ambi-dextrous, would take the offender
-neck and crop and throw him out. This always
-cooled the most amorous follower, but it kept
-Signor De June quite busy. Yet it must not be
-thought that the Signor was brutal—far from it: all
-were welcome to worship his ladies, but it must be
-done from the parquette or dress circle.</p>
-
-<p>So they were all very prosperous and very happy,
-until one day the wife of Signor De June appeared
-and camped upon his trail. He had gotten an Indiana
-divorce from this woman five years before,<span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_110"></a>[110]</span>
-but the courts had pronounced it invalid, and now
-she was upon him neck and crop, just as he had
-been upon the lovers and husbands. He tried to
-explain to her that he loved the Corps de Ballet, not
-the ladies individually. He loved them as a Whole,
-not singly. Moreover, his love was idyllic—Platonic.
-The wife explained that the thing did not exist except
-in books, and further stated her belief that the
-love was Plutonic if anything; and moreover it
-must cease.</p>
-
-<p>No doubt the woman really loved Mr. Hunks. He,
-too, had a little regard for her, although they quarrelled.
-But he was essentially commercial—a man
-of peace. He had no stomach for a legal battle with
-his wife’s attorneys, who had taken the case on speculation,
-and he could not run away. The woman
-utterly refused to be bought off for a reasonable sum,
-and she also declined joining the Ballet herself, in
-spite of De June’s assertions that he could love seventeen
-as well as sixteen, for in love capacity increases
-through use.</p>
-
-<p>“Try it for a month and you will see that it is
-Platonic,” said De June.</p>
-
-<p>“I’ve no doubt I’d find it so,” said the wife.</p>
-
-<p>She still was firm. He must choose between her
-and the Troupe. If he chose the Troupe he’d have
-her, like the poor, always with him. If he chose<span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_111"></a>[111]</span>
-her alone she would still resemble the poverty stricken;
-but there would come times when vigilance might
-relax and he could slip a way.</p>
-
-<p>But what to do with the Troupe! He could not
-throw these beautiful, susceptible women on a struggling,
-seething, wicked world. He could not put
-them on a farm, for who would look after, correct,
-discipline and restrain them as he had done? If
-allowed to scatter they would marry, and marriage
-according to civilized methods, so-called, was a failure;
-had he not tried it?</p>
-
-<p>But De June was a man of resource (he was
-from Chicago). They were in Denver and women
-were scarce. He would select husbands for his
-ladies, himself.</p>
-
-<p>He did so, choosing sixteen strong fine young
-miners. Calling the men out one side, he made
-known to them his plan. Each man was to have a
-wife on payment of the trifling fee of two hundred
-dollars “matriculation” (<i>Sic</i>). The men were delighted—but
-had the ladies been consulted? No,
-that was not necessary—there was to be a return
-to primitive methods, which indeed were ever best:
-civilization was artificial, unnatural and corrupt.</p>
-
-<p>These sixteen ladies were all of fair intelligence,
-good hearted, able to work, willing to obey. More
-than that they had great capacity for loving, for had<span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_112"></a>[112]</span>
-not this excess of love been their misfortune? The
-love only needed proper direction, like all of our
-other gifts.</p>
-
-<p>The sixteen gentlemen that the philosophic De
-June selected were of fair intelligence, healthy and
-good natured, prosperous and all men of fine physique.
-There was no choice in the men; there was no
-choice in the women; they were on the same intellectual
-plane—they were well mated and De June
-would not defeat the God of Chance by allowing any
-personal selection. One man offered a thousand
-dollars for first choice, but Mr. Hunks was a man of
-honor and could not be bought.</p>
-
-<p>The gentlemen were to be in the parquette. When
-the ladies appeared on the stage, at the word “Go”
-from De June, the sixteen men were to make a
-rush for the stage and each seize his future wife.
-All after the manner of the Romans who captured the
-Sabine women—and I guess the Roman Nation is
-not to be sneezed at! Cæsar, Antony, Brutus and all
-the rest of those honorable men were products of just
-such marriages.</p>
-
-<p>The rush was made—the women screamed, some
-fainted, but each man held his prize. The electric
-lights were turned off, the audience got out as best
-it could. Then the doors were locked, the curtain
-dropped and Signor De June stepped forward and<span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_113"></a>[113]</span>
-in gentle words assured the sixteen ladies that no
-harm should come to them. All had been arranged
-for the best. They must be good honest wives, and
-the men must be good honest husbands, and Mr.
-Hunks, being a Justice of the Peace, declared them
-all man and wife—that is sixteen wives and sixteen
-husbands.</p>
-
-<p>The women, it must be confessed, had grown a
-trifle weary of the De June Idyllic Plan; and in the
-good old-fashioned womanly way, oft in the night
-season, each had confessed in her own heart, that one
-loving husband for each woman was what Nature
-intended. So they accepted the situation, and each
-began to use those winning ways that Herbert Spencer
-says are woman’s weapons: woman conquers
-through her intuition.</p>
-
-<p>At a word from De June the women repaired to
-their dressing rooms and soon appeared in customary
-feminine attire. This time the ladies had to pick
-their mates, for the change in dress greatly mystified
-the hirsute miners. There was a slight scramble
-among the ladies when three of them selected the
-same man, but the Signor soon brought order out of
-chaos. This scene, which occurs in chapter XXXIII,
-is quite dramatic.</p>
-
-<p>All being amicably settled De June gave each
-woman a chaste kiss on the cheek, shook hands<span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_114"></a>[114]</span>
-with the grateful miners and went sorrowfully back
-(with his $3,200.00) to the hotel where his Mary
-Jane sat up awaiting him.</p>
-
-<p>That night Mr. Hunks and his wife left for Chicago.
-There he went into real estate and was very successful.
-Having resolved to face his fate, he treated
-Mary Jane as gently as he could and she repaid it all
-in kindness. So things were really not so bad as the
-Signor had imagined.</p>
-
-<p>Ten years passed and Mr. Hunks went back to
-Denver and found that the sixteen couples were living
-happily. Many little pledges had appeared to
-cement the bonds. All were content and perfectly
-mated, although several of the men were a bit henpecked—but
-a man soon gets used to such things.
-(See page 491, line 16). The women having had
-Experience were resolved to hold their new found
-mates with love’s own bonds; and the men fearing to
-lose such beautiful treasures were ever kind. There
-was a little doubt in the minds of all concerning De
-June’s commission as Justice of the Peace, and then
-certain requirements of the divorce courts had not
-been fully met, but these irregularities put all on their
-good behavior. For it is a fact that if a mortal knows
-that his mate cannot get away he is often severe and
-unreasonable.</p>
-
-<p>And the curious part of all this is that the story is<span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_115"></a>[115]</span>
-true. Mr. Cudahy protests it on his honor, and declares
-that these sixteen worthy couples laid the
-foundation for the elite of Denver society, and are
-now the leading lights in that beautiful city.</p>
-
-<p>The story is somewhat marred by such ungrammatical
-expressions as “has came,” “shouldn’t ought,”
-etc. There are also a needless number of French
-and Latin phrases, culled from a lexicon I fear, and
-a striving after Latin derivatives. It is also a pity
-that more pains was not taken with the proof reading,
-as exasperating errors are on nearly every page.
-Still these are minor points.</p>
-
-<p>In the last four chapters there is considerable symbolism,
-which one cannot but wish had been put in
-plain English. Like Zangwill’s <i>The Master</i>, the
-moral is left for the last. It is a little clouded, but I
-take it that Mr. Cudahy believes that civilization’s
-plan of selection is very faulty. He suggests indirectly
-that Congress should appoint Matrimonial
-Commissioners for each district—men of discretion,
-experience and judgment. The Commissioner is to
-select from society sixteen marriageable young women
-and place them in a room, and then take a like number
-of young men and let them make a rush, and
-this, says Mr. Cudahy, would doubtless do away with
-many of our matrimonial misfits.</p>
-
-<p>Lovers of literature will look anxiously for Mr.<span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_116"></a>[116]</span>
-Cudahy’s next book, and in the meantime I am sure
-that the Young Decadents will reap a rich harvest
-from <i>The Pawns of Chance</i>. I am in receipt of a
-letter from the distinguished author wherein he says
-that he is positively declining all invitations to lecture
-in the provinces, but that he may appear late in the
-season in a few of our principal cities.</p>
-
-<p>It may interest the Philistines to know that R. G.
-Dun &amp; Co. rate Mr. Cudahy Z Z xxx 1, while
-Hobart Chatfield-Chatfield Taylor is only Y x 2 3·4
-and Mrs. Reginald De Koven ranks K x 4. At the
-present moment I can recall but two residents of
-Grub Street who have ratings so high as Mr. Cudahy,
-these being William Waldorf Astor and Walter Blackburn
-Harte.</p>
-
-<p class="right"><span class="smcap">Elbert Hubbard.</span></p>
-
-<div class="figcenter">
-<img src="images/deco1.jpg" width="30" height="30" alt="" />
-</div>
-
-<div class="chapter">
-
-<h2 class="nobreak" id="THE_MANNERS_TART">THE MANNERS TART.</h2>
-
-</div>
-
-<div>
-<img class="dropcap" src="images/dropcap-a.jpg" width="50" height="60" alt="" />
-</div>
-
-<p class="dropcap">An old and worn out Tart once sat on the pantry
-shelf and as it dried and stiffened, thus it
-soliloquized: “In my youth men fought over me,
-not to possess me, but that each should pass me to his
-neighbor.</p>
-
-<p>“I was a fair Tart, greatly to be prized, but the
-manners of all were such that I was left alone on the<span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_117"></a>[117]</span>
-table, the last of my kind, the Manners Tart, and
-they all withdrew, feigning indifference.</p>
-
-<p>“The cook, having made many of my brethren,
-cared not for me, so I, created to rejoice the soul of
-man, sit here, a cold and cheerless thing at which the
-rats gnaw nightly.</p>
-
-<p>“There was a little boy at the table, but why speak
-of him? He stretched out his hand for me, but
-detecting a slight frown between the eyebrows of his
-mother, he withdrew it and my chance was gone.</p>
-
-<p>“The little boy was the only one that sympathized
-with me; he knew that a Tart is short lived at best;
-that the only modest ambition of a Tart is to gladden
-some one in life and to overhear a few words of
-praise as it passes away.</p>
-
-<p>“But alas! I am a failure, and all because I move
-in a circle that makes a merit of self-sacrifice. I do
-not understand such things, but——” here a pang of
-mold struck to the Tart’s heart and it relapsed into
-unconsciousness.</p>
-
-<p>If it had understood it would have said—“there
-are many joys in the world that die unrejoiced over
-because no man will have the courage to do what he
-wants to do.”</p>
-
-<p class="right"><span class="smcap">Clara Cahill Park.</span></p>
-
-<p><span class="smcap">Detroit</span>, August, 1895.</p>
-
-<div class="figcenter">
-
-<img src="images/deco1.jpg" width="30" height="30" alt="" />
-
-</div>
-
-<div class="chapter">
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_118"></a>[118]</span></p>
-
-<h2 class="nobreak" id="A_MATTER_OF_BACKGROUND">A MATTER OF BACKGROUND.</h2>
-
-</div>
-
-<div>
-<img class="dropcap" src="images/dropcap-i.jpg" width="50" height="60" alt="" />
-</div>
-
-<p class="dropcap">If the war in the extreme East just ended has done
-no more for humanity, it has demonstrated the
-unfitness in these days of a nation that has no perspective.
-Philosophers we have had, and eke reformers,
-who saw no farther than their noses. But
-here is a great people whose polity is exclusive,
-whose art recognizes no relation of distance, whose
-social code is rigidly formal and openly mercenary,
-whose methods in war consisted up to a late date of
-noise and stenches and hideous banners designed to
-frighten an enemy. With rare powers of detail, the
-art of China is lifeless and without spirituality or suggestive
-force. With centuries of training in literary
-industry, its lore is the elaborate repetition of didactic
-sayings thousands of years old. There is no background
-in its pictures. There is no constructive basis
-in its social theory. All is flat surface, repression,
-imitation. Yet here is the oldest nation in the world
-in continuous history. We need not wonder it has
-fallen at last. The marvel is that it stood so long.
-The student of history may well ask what has held
-back destroying hands through so many centuries of
-the world’s unrest.</p>
-
-<p>Lack of a sense of proportion and distance is not
-peculiar, however, to Orientals. Even in the light<span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_119"></a>[119]</span>
-of western civilization philosophers have forgotten
-yesterday and to-morrow, and the foreground has
-usurped the canvas. Impatience is a sign of modern
-degeneration if the oracle who has a caveat on that
-warning is good authority. It is strange to find in
-the prophet himself the fault he attributes to our
-time. For in all ages the world has been on the
-point of going to the dogs, according to some voice
-crying in the wilderness or on the house tops, as he is
-crying now. From Jonah warning luxurious Nineveh
-down to Max Simon Nordau listing crooked ears as
-the breeder counts his cross-billed chicks as proof
-that the race is “running out,” the warning has been
-unceasing. And yet the race lives, and builds on its
-ruins.</p>
-
-<p>Our nerves have worn us out, according to Mr.
-Nordau. If Count Tolstoi knows, amatory passion is
-the cause of the wreck, and high feeding back of
-that. If Mr. Ibsen is right, artificiality has destroyed
-the virtues. M. Zola is sure that bestiality has
-brought judgment upon at least one modern Sodom.
-Mynheer Maartens is Philistine enough to ascribe
-most of our ills to repression of sincerity, of naturalness
-in social life. And so a score of doctors describe
-special symptoms, each empirically, each truthfully.
-The wisest of them—those who have a sense of perspective—see
-beyond the immediate ailment the persistent<span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_120"></a>[120]</span>
-vitality which is never wholly conquered.</p>
-
-<p>We have specialized philosophy and literature as
-we have medicine. These are not quacks who tell
-us the world is going to wreck through the extravagances
-of society, through the repression of humanities,
-through the lusts of gross living. They are
-students of particular phases of distemper. The
-world, not the men in its clinics, is to blame when it
-hails each as a cure-all. The realism of a Zola or a
-Nordau is not a finality. While the knife is in hand
-the ulcer is pre-eminently in evidence. Its removal
-is the business in order. But the genius of a Zola
-that divines the cancer in the vitals of society presupposes
-the life that is behind it—and that is the
-main factor in his surgery.</p>
-
-<p>He would be a false teacher who should put the
-immediate in the place of the permanent in any such
-calculation. The world that listens has an equal responsibility.
-The greatest artist can only paint passing
-phases of the limitless evolution going on about
-him. It is heresy in itself fatal to put a phase in the
-place of the infinite process. Grant that society is
-always at war with itself, always repressing truth,
-always promoting animalism by its very more or less
-disguises. The paradox of these results can never
-be wholly escaped. The teacher who sees what is
-and was in due proportion will judge what is to be,<span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_121"></a>[121]</span>
-though no son of a prophet. The new realism for
-which Philistines contend is no expose of the evils
-of modern society, no uncovering of a witch’s pot.
-It holds all these manifestations in perspective, but
-substitutes none of them for a general view of life
-and human destiny. It would make health instead
-of disease infectious, substituting for blind Oriental
-imitation a truer standard of custom, freer from convention
-that has no warrant of purpose, more direct
-in its expression of natural and normal vitality
-in personal living and thinking. “From within
-outward,” is its motto. It would depose and outgrow
-self-consciousness—the vampire fungus that
-signalizes arrested development and decay in thought
-or in letters or in the self-projection of social life.
-The realism of the Philistines is manifested in the
-recognition of healthy life that we find in some of
-the new literature—in the heroic romance of Anthony
-Hope, in the charming tenderness and sweetness of
-Maartens’s Hollandais and in the fresh-witted islanders,
-full of arterial blood, of Hall Caine and the
-wizard who lies buried on the mountain top of his
-own beloved island—that second one to the left
-after you leave San Francisco.</p>
-
-<p>Even the modern stage, corrupted by French
-intensities and the commercial idea of filling the
-house, is showing signs of a reaction. Not more<span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_122"></a>[122]</span>
-than nine-tenths of the standard attractions of the
-coming season are based on infractions of the seventh
-commandment or of that similar law which every
-chivalrous man knows, though it was never traced
-in fire on the Sinaitic stone.</p>
-
-<p class="right"><span class="smcap">William McIntosh.</span></p>
-
-<div class="figcenter">
-<img src="images/deco1.jpg" width="30" height="30" alt="" />
-</div>
-
-<div class="chapter">
-
-<h2 class="nobreak" id="IN_SLIPPERY_PLACES">IN SLIPPERY PLACES.</h2>
-
-</div>
-
-<div class="blockquote">
-
-<p>“Publish it not in the streets of Askelon lest the
-daughters of <span class="smcap">The Philistines</span> rejoice.”</p>
-
-</div>
-
-<div>
-<img class="dropcap" src="images/dropcap-t.jpg" width="50" height="60" alt="" />
-</div>
-
-<p class="dropcap">The publishers of the <i>Chap Book</i> of July 15th have
-kept their promise to furnish original matter in
-one way perhaps not contemplated when they made
-mention of that booklet in their catalogue.</p>
-
-<p>We can rest assured that Tacitus never wrote
-“emperasset” in the sentence quoted on page 174;
-we shall be slow to believe that the author of <i>The
-Children of the Ghetto</i>, in confusion of mind was referring
-empire and empirical to a common origin,
-mixing up the sons of Aeneas and Danaos after the
-fashion of Little Buttercup.</p>
-
-<p>With perhaps a trifle less confidence we may acquit
-him of dragging into notice as a prominent name in
-English letters the hitherto obscure or wholly mythical
-“Carlysle,” who figures on page 177. But in excusing
-the writer from the fatherhood of these literary foundlings<span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_123"></a>[123]</span>
-we are compelled to look to the publishers or at
-least to their proof-reader as the responsible man, a
-sense of decency no less than the requirements of this
-metaphor, repudiates the suggestion that he might
-after all turn out to be a woman, and whether the
-reproach belong at the door of the principals or of the
-workman is quite immaterial to us, the house must
-stand the breakage of glassware, not the bartender.</p>
-
-<p>A matter of two typographical errors within the
-space of a single short article may seem but trifling
-subject for comment in a world where the surest
-footed at times slip, but one or two considerations
-make even such venial sins fit objects for animadversion.
-The publishers of the little fortnightly, in
-the manner of their issues if not in so many words,
-set themselves up, in a fashion, as guides in the
-matter of literary elegance, it behooves them therefore
-to take heed that the unwary be not led astray.
-“Who drives fat oxen should himself be fat,” nor
-should the venerable name of Caxton be made a laughing-stock
-in the mouths of scoffers.</p>
-
-<p class="right">W.</p>
-
-<p><span class="smcap">San Francisco</span>, August, 1895.</p>
-
-<div class="figcenter">
-<img src="images/deco1.jpg" width="30" height="30" alt="" />
-</div>
-
-<p><span class="smcap">To Mark Twain</span>: I am awfully sorry you have
-lost all your money. I am in the same boat, but
-let’s not talk about it all the time.</p>
-
-<div class="figcenter">
-<img src="images/deco1.jpg" width="30" height="30" alt="" />
-</div>
-
-<div class="chapter">
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_124"></a>[124]</span></p>
-
-<h2 class="nobreak" id="A_LANTERN_SONG">A LANTERN SONG.</h2>
-
-</div>
-
-<div class="poetry-container">
-<div class="poetry">
-  <div class="stanza allsmcap">
-    <div class="verse indent0">EACH SMALL GLEAM WAS A VOICE</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">—A LANTERN VOICE—</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">IN LITTLE SONGS OF CARMINE, VIOLET, GREEN, GOLD.</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">A CHORUS OF COLORS CAME OVER THE WATER,</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">THE WONDROUS LEAF-SHADOWS NO LONGER WAVERED,</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">NO PINES CROONED ON THE HILLS,</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">THE BLUE NIGHT WAS ELSEWHERE A SILENCE</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">WHEN THE CHORUS OF COLORS CAME OVER THE WATER,</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">LITTLE SONGS OF CARMINE, VIOLET, GREEN, GOLD.</div>
-  </div>
-  <div class="stanza allsmcap">
-    <div class="verse indent0">SMALL GLOWING PEBBLES</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">THROWN ON THE DARK PLANE OF EVENING</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">SING GOOD BALLADS OF GOD</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">AND ETERNITY, WITH SOUL’S REST.</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">LITTLE PRIESTS, LITTLE HOLY FATHERS,</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">NONE CAN DOUBT THE TRUTH OF YOUR HYMNING</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">WHEN THE MARVELOUS CHORUS COMES OVER THE WATER,</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">SONGS OF CARMINE, VIOLET, GREEN, GOLD.</div>
-  </div>
-  <div class="stanza">
-    <div class="verse right"><span class="smcap">Stephen Crane.</span></div>
-  </div>
-</div>
-</div>
-
-<div class="figcenter">
-<img src="images/deco1.jpg" width="30" height="30" alt="" />
-</div>
-
-<div class="chapter">
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_125"></a>[125]</span></p>
-
-<h2 class="nobreak" id="THE_RUBAIYAT_OF_OMARA_KHAYVAN">THE RUBAIYAT OF O’MARA KHAYVAN.</h2>
-
-<p class="center allsmcap">ERIN (IRAN?) YEAR OF THE HEGIRA 94—VIA
-BROOKLYN.</p>
-
-</div>
-
-<div class="poetry-container">
-<div class="poetry">
-  <div class="stanza">
-    <div class="verse indent0">Wake! for the night that lets poor man forget</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">His daily toil is past, and in Care’s net</div>
-    <div class="verse indent2">Another day is caught to gasp and fade;</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">Oh, but my weary bones are heavy yet!</div>
-  </div>
-  <div class="stanza">
-    <div class="verse indent0">Wake! son of kings that bears a hod on high,</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">And builds the world. The red sun mounts the sky</div>
-    <div class="verse indent2">And circles squares in the cot’s every chink</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">And gilds ephemeral motes that whirl and die.</div>
-  </div>
-  <div class="stanza">
-    <div class="verse indent0">Wake! for the bearded goat devours the door!</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">And now the family pig forbears to snore,</div>
-    <div class="verse indent2">And from his trough sets up the Persian’s cry—</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">“Eat! drink! To-morrow we shall be no more!”</div>
-  </div>
-  <div class="stanza">
-    <div class="verse indent0">Eat, drink and sleep! Aye, eat and sleep who can!</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">I work and ache. The beast outstrips the man;</div>
-    <div class="verse indent2">And when oblivion bids the sequence end,</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">Which shall we say has best filled nature’s plan?</div>
-  </div>
-  <div class="stanza">
-    <div class="verse indent0">When on Gowanus’ hills the whistle blows</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">What dreams are mine of Hafiz’ wine-red rose?</div>
-    <div class="verse indent2">And when I drag my leaden feet toward home</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">No sensuous bulbul note woos to repose.</div>
-  </div>
-  <div class="stanza">
-    <div class="verse indent0">I envy the dull brute my hand shall slay.</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">He lifts no stolid eye above the clay.</div>
-    <div class="verse indent2">I, longing, on the cloud-banked verge discern</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">“Unborn To-morrow and dead Yesterday.”</div><span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_126"></a>[126]</span>
-  </div>
-  <div class="stanza">
-    <div class="verse indent0">What is the Cup to lips that may not drain?</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">Or fleeting joy to lives conceived in pain?</div>
-    <div class="verse indent2">Toil and aspire is still the common lot,</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">Stumbling to rise and rising fall again.</div>
-  </div>
-  <div class="stanza">
-    <div class="verse indent0">And is this all? Shall skies no longer shine,</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">Or stars lure on to themes that seem divine?</div>
-    <div class="verse indent2">Ah, Maker of the Tents! is this thy hope—</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">To feed and grovel and to die like swine?</div>
-  </div>
-  <div class="stanza">
-    <div class="verse right">W. M.</div>
-  </div>
-</div>
-</div>
-
-<div class="figcenter">
-<img src="images/deco1.jpg" width="30" height="30" alt="" />
-</div>
-
-<div class="figleft">
-<img src="images/deco3.jpg" width="170" height="100" alt="" />
-</div>
-
-<div class="chapter">
-
-<h2 class="nobreak hanging allsmcap" id="SIDE_TALKS_WITH_THE_PHILISTINES">SIDE TALKS WITH THE PHILISTINES:
-BEING SUNDRY BITS OF
-WISDOM WHICH HAVE BEEN
-HERETOFORE SECRETED, AND ARE NOW
-SET FORTH IN PRINT. <img class="inline" src="images/deco1.jpg" alt="" /></h2>
-
-</div>
-
-<p><img class="inline" src="images/deco1.jpg" alt="" /> To Robert Cameron Rogers: You are keeping
-the stage waiting.</p>
-
-<p><img class="inline" src="images/deco1.jpg" alt="" /> My friend with the Sharp Scissors which edit
-the Table Talk column of the Buffalo <i>Commercial</i>
-had a few words to say the other evening regarding
-success. He alleged that Mr. Bok and Richard
-Harding Davis were successful men, and that it was
-the pleasure of unsuccessful people to jump on them
-mercilessly. I dislike to disagree with Mr. Quilp,
-but it seems to me that he belongs to that class of
-people who habitually miss the point of things.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_127"></a>[127]</span></p>
-
-<p>The story in <i>Gil Blas</i> of the strolling player—true
-to what he deemed his art—working with commendable
-if misdirected energy, walking from town to
-town, and as he walked soaking his dry crusts in the
-water of wayside wells—this were a story of success.
-Success, it seems to me, lies not so much in having
-one’s name a commonplace among this great American
-public, which falls down to worship mediocrity
-if it is well advertised, as in doing one’s day’s work
-honestly and sincerely. To sing a song that finds
-its way into the hearts of men; to act a part that
-helps another toward his happiness, and do it all
-without blare of trumpets and jangle of hurdy-gurdy;
-and then walk on to the next town, stopping by the
-roadside wells to soak a dry crust in cool water, or,
-perhaps, a fresh cake in a mug of Bass as occasion
-served, and then, at the end, to lie down quietly,
-listening to the singing by the people of one’s own
-songs—though they know it not—presents a picture
-of a perfect harmony. This is the preachment of
-Stevenson and of men before him, and until a better
-one may be advanced this will serve. I would
-rather have written <i>The Pavilion on the Links</i> than
-<i>Successward</i>, or even Mr. Davis’s masterpiece, <i>Van
-Bibber and the Swan Boats</i>. Still, it is a matter of
-taste, and if one likes lactated food, roast mutton is
-bad for his stomach.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_128"></a>[128]</span></p>
-
-<p><img class="inline" src="images/deco1.jpg" alt="" /> According to the prospectus Mr. Cudahy’s book
-fairly bristles with epigram: the bristles alone are
-said to be worth the money.</p>
-
-<p><img class="inline" src="images/deco1.jpg" alt="" /> Probably Lawrence Hutton knows more about
-death masks than any living man. I cheerfully grant
-him this honor, but when he writes the advertising
-pages in <i>Harper’s</i> and springs them on an unsuspecting
-public as “Literary Notes,” I rebel. Rebellion
-is not, however, confined to mere objection to his
-sailing under false colors, but to such sentences as
-these from a recent number of <i>Harper’s</i>:</p>
-
-<div class="blockquote">
-
-<p>“<i>Beyond the Dreams of Avarice</i> is not as <i>amusing</i>
-as an entertaining story, but it is intensely interesting
-from beginning to end. No one who picks it up for
-an evening’s <i>amusement</i> will be likely to lay it down
-unfinished or to lay it aside for any other form of current
-<i>entertainment</i>.”</p>
-</div>
-
-<p>The italics are mine, and are put in simply to emphasize
-the occult meaning of Mr. Hutton, who belongs
-to the class which assumes to set the literary
-pace of the world. I doubt if Brander Matthews
-could do worse.</p>
-
-<p><img class="inline" src="images/deco1.jpg" alt="" /> The portrait of Mr. Cudahy that is used as a frontispiece
-in his new book is a photograph from the original
-chromo, signed by the electrotyper.</p>
-
-<p><img class="inline" src="images/deco1.jpg" alt="" /> It is reported to me that quite a large section of<span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_129"></a>[129]</span>
-the Metropolitan colony sing their jubilate this way:
-“It is Howells that hath made us and not we ourselves—We
-are his people and the sheep of his
-pasture.”</p>
-
-<p><img class="inline" src="images/deco1.jpg" alt="" /> “Papa,” said the smart boy at dinner, “does consomme
-mean consumed?”</p>
-
-<p>“No, my son,” said the philologic pa, “consomme
-is from a Latin word, <i>summum</i>—all—and comes to
-us via the French. It means ‘all together’—the
-same as the Trilby pose.” And there was silence
-for the space of four seconds.</p>
-
-<p><img class="inline" src="images/deco1.jpg" alt="" /> Somebody has sent me the prospectus of a magazine
-shortly to be published in Cincinnati. In spite of
-rumors to the contrary <span class="smcap">The Philistine</span> will continue
-publication. Even <i>The Century</i>, although frightened,
-will let advertising contracts as heretofore. <span class="smcap">The
-Philistine</span>, and supposedly other magazines, base
-their hopes of a longer existence not on their equal
-worth—for lo! it is but timorously we draw breath
-after reading this prospectus—but knowing that the
-new magazine will be keyed to so exquisite a pitch of
-literary supremacy that only a few from the world
-erudite may revel in such a rarified atmosphere.
-The birth of the periodical—from the prospectus—fittingly
-closes this momentous era. Evolution, hitherto
-satisfied with minute gradations, now forges<span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_130"></a>[130]</span>
-ahead in a stupendous leap; we are diatoms, we
-scratch rudely on bones, and live in caves; we still
-bag the mastodon with embryonic pitfall, we shave
-with a shell and are only paleozoic microbes in a
-literary miocene age. We are mental fossils clogged
-in stratified oblivion—but we can’t help it, we are
-rudimentary and still possess some basal instincts
-such as love, religion, love of beauty and the like.
-But we never imagined how infinitesimal we were until
-the coming of that fatal prospectus. Now we realize
-that the groaning of the world, the extraordinary upheaval
-of the age, the quickening of the leaven, the
-quaking of the Zeit Gheist were but the premonitory
-travaillings of eternity before the awful nativity of
-this infant from Over-the-Rhine. The veil of our
-temple is rent and our suspenders are in hock.
-Mighty Spirit of the æons have mercy on us! we are
-worms! moribund, senile old things. Our ears are
-sessile, yet we hear the portents. In this hackneyed,
-conventional, sterile age somebody is going to be
-original! Prostrate we make obeisance. Spare us
-Original that is to be—spare us! But who t’ell
-started this Literary Fresh Air Fund, anyway?</p>
-
-<p><img class="inline" src="images/deco1.jpg" alt="" /> “Three generations from the soil” may be a good
-rule of social eligibility after all. I know a family in
-one of our great lake cities which has ruled society
-therein for half a lifetime and it is only two removes<span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_131"></a>[131]</span>
-from the mud. But savagery will crop out now and
-then, despite all the austerities of social custom and
-the perpetual effort to reach the calm of Nirvana and
-look as if life was a doosid bore. The delight of
-these, as of all savages, is to astonish the natives.
-When it can be done by driving a loping team of
-circus horses down the chief avenue of the city, that
-suffices. Another pet trick is to mass the family on
-the porch of the wooden-castled mansion on a Sunday
-morning and take their pictures in group, in full
-view of worshippers returning from church. The
-suggestion of a Ute reservation at such times is complete.
-When these fail to create a sensation, a yellow
-tally-ho driven madly through the narrowest
-streets of the Quartier Teuton, scattering dogs and
-babies, with whoops and horns and the mottled circus
-horses in the lead, does the business. It isn’t so
-long since the richest of our American nobility showed
-the craven blood of the materialistic sons of the bush,
-to whom brute life is everything. The American-English
-duel that failed is still an unpleasant memory.
-I mention these things only to illustrate the paradox
-of our days. We do labor hard to get rid of the joy
-of living and we call the new state culture and repose,
-when we get it. But the storage of force is a poor
-thing. It breaks out in abnormal ways and the acquisitive
-father is punished in his degenerate children<span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_132"></a>[132]</span>
-to the third and fourth generation sometimes—and
-usually to the second.</p>
-
-<p><img class="inline" src="images/deco1.jpg" alt="" /> I have received the second volume of <i>Moods</i>, which
-my Philadelphia correspondent calls <i>Sulks</i>. It is a
-retrograde from the first number in that in some
-places the printing is on both sides of the leaf. I
-had hope that <i>Moods</i> would continue its good work
-and in the second number leave both sides blank.
-As it is, however, I commend the first volume to that
-eminent figurer, Mr. Edward Atkinson of Boston,
-who may use the blank sides upon which to calculate
-what the other pages are good for. By the way, the
-announcement of the second volume contains a description
-of the type used, which is a reprint of the
-typefounder’s circular concerning the Jenson type. I
-would imagine that some of the geniuses of <i>Moods</i>
-could have at least written an original circular. The
-prospectus of the second volume contains a list
-of one hundred and seventeen stars—geniuses of
-the first magnitude—still as my friend of the <i>Picayune</i>
-says, “Though they twinkle, twinkle, twinkle, we
-wonder what they are.”</p>
-
-<p><img class="inline" src="images/deco1.jpg" alt="" /> If McClure can give us more such exquisite stories
-as the Zenda tale in the August number, a good deal
-of reminiscent literature and living documents may
-be pardoned. Hope is better than memory, Mr.
-McClure.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_133"></a>[133]</span></p>
-
-<p><img class="inline" src="images/deco1.jpg" alt="" /> Mr. Frank A. Munsey, who prints a picture book,
-of which eleven million copies are sold every four
-weeks, declares in a shrill, throaty falsetto that
-American literature at present is so and so; and that
-in the future he proposes to have it <i>so</i>. Mr. Oppenheimer
-of Rochester has not yet been heard from.</p>
-
-<p><img class="inline" src="images/deco1.jpg" alt="" /> I hope no one suspects me of any disrespect
-toward Mr. Ham Garland of the Chicago Stock
-Yards, heretofore noticed in these columns. A correspondent
-reminds me that Mr. G. is favorably
-mentioned in the oldest records. The historian of
-the creation remarks “And Ham was the father of
-Canaan.”</p>
-
-<p><img class="inline" src="images/deco1.jpg" alt="" /> Chicago’s <i>Echo</i> should be successful. It is taking
-from the foreign periodicals their very best of picturings
-and giving us a taste of the delightful fun of
-<i>Fliegende Blætter</i>, <i>La Rire</i>, and the rest—a fun
-which somehow we cannot produce in America, so
-<i>Puck’s</i> artists and those of <i>Judge</i> and a few others
-borrow the ideas and we pat ourselves on the back
-and say what a keen sense of humor we have. We
-are very funny—we Americans—funnier, by long
-odds, than we think. I notice, too, that <i>The Echo</i>
-knows another good thing when it sees it, so the
-editors have made the printers use my pet grape
-leaves for the beginnings of their paragraphs. For
-this compliment to my taste I thank <i>The Echo</i>.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_134"></a>[134]</span></p>
-
-<p><img class="inline" src="images/deco1.jpg" alt="" /> What we are coming to in poetry is always a fascinating
-theme—like biking in the dark on a strange
-road. But what we are going away from is more
-satisfactory to contemplate. It is pleasant to think
-that Homer, the blind minstrel, and Omar, the tent
-maker, are fixed facts. They are the poles of verse—one
-standing for the heroic and romantic, self-unconscious
-and buoyant, the other for vampire introspection
-and fatalism which mistakes interior darkness
-for an eclipse of the universe. It is also consoling to
-know that such poetry as Francis Saltus Saltus’s
-“Dreams After Sunset” and Duncan Campbell
-Scott’s yawp in the August number has been written—for
-they won’t have to be written again.</p>
-
-<p><img class="inline" src="images/deco1.jpg" alt="" /> Judge Grant, in commenting on the ways of the
-Summer Girl in the July <i>Scribner’s</i>, says that after
-her return to her own particular vine and fig-tree she
-has, among other perplexities, “a considerable uncertainty
-in her mind as <i>to whom she is engaged to</i>.”
-This is in form somewhat similar to the reporter who
-said the victim of the trolley accident was killed
-fatally dead.</p>
-
-<p><img class="inline" src="images/deco1.jpg" alt="" /> According to Mr. F. Hopkinson Smith, who parts
-his name in the middle and therefore ought to know,
-“Abbey in his art really has done what Wagner has
-done in music, Tennyson and the poets in verse.” He
-says so in the current <i>Scribner’s</i>. Tennyson “and”<span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_135"></a>[135]</span>
-the poets is so kind—with accent on the “so.” The
-author of “Locksley Hall” ought to come back to
-Lily Dale or somewhere and thank Mr. Hopsmith.</p>
-
-<p><img class="inline" src="images/deco1.jpg" alt="" /> The style of whiskers formerly called “Dundreary,”
-is now known as “The Wind in the Clearing.”</p>
-
-<p><img class="inline" src="images/deco1.jpg" alt="" /> I have received from the Department of Agriculture
-an envelope labelled “Official Business—Penalty
-for Private Use $300.” Stamped across the face
-in red ink is the autograph of Hon. D. N. Lockwood.
-Inside this envelope was one still smaller which bore
-this inscription:</p>
-
-<div class="boxdots">
-
-<p class="center">U. S. Department of Agriculture.</p>
-
-<p class="center">FORGET-ME-NOT.</p>
-
-<p class="center">Blue.</p>
-
-<p>A half-hardy perennial. It prefers
-a moist situation, is easily grown and
-blooms early.</p>
-
-</div>
-
-<p>If I remember correctly Mr. Lockwood Ran for
-something during last fall’s campaign. I wonder
-what he is going to Run for next that he wishes
-to be remembered.</p>
-
-<p><span class="pagenum"><a id="Page_136"></a>[136]</span></p>
-
-<p><img class="inline" src="images/deco1.jpg" alt="" /> New York rejoices in the possession of a magazine
-for rich people. It is called <i>Form</i>, and it tells all
-about the first families—Knickerbockers and others—and
-what they do to be decent. I understand it proposes
-to offer prizes after the manner of Judge Tourgee’s
-<i>Basis</i> for the cleverest paraphrase of the second
-verse in Genesis. The historian of creation declares
-that on the first day “the earth was without <i>Form</i>,
-and void.” It’s a great “ad.”</p>
-
-<div class="poetry-container">
-<div class="poetry">
-  <div class="stanza">
-    <div class="verse indent0"><img class="inline" src="images/deco1.jpg" alt="" /> In</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">Praising poetry of William Morris</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">And Stephen Crane</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">Were you poking fun?</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">I hope ’twas so:</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">For</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">You must perceive</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">That those slashed and mangled lines</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">Do no more resemblance bear</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">To true poetry</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">Than hacked and shattered corpse</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">On battle field</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">Bears</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">To a perfect man,</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">Whose form divinely fair</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">Fitly enfolds feelings consummate</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">Against such lines—</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">And in fact ’gainst all your verse,</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">I do</div>
-    <div class="verse indent0">Protest.</div>
-  </div>
-  <div class="stanza">
-    <div class="verse right"><span class="smcap">Nelson Ayres.</span></div>
-    <p><span class="smcap">New Orleans</span>, Aug. 15, ’95.</p>
-  </div>
-</div>
-</div>
-
-<hr class="chap x-ebookmaker-drop" />
-
-<div class="figcenter">
-<img src="images/pigs.jpg" width="500" height="265" alt="" />
-</div>
-
-<p><img class="inline" src="images/deco1.jpg" alt="" /> At the Publishers’ Convention recently held in San
-Francisco the delegates were treated to a steamboat
-ride down the bay where a picnic was held. Police
-were on hand to see that the delegates did not all
-rush down a steep place into the sea and perish in the
-waters.</p>
-
-<div style='display:block; margin-top:4em'>*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE PHILISTINE: A PERIODICAL OF PROTEST (VOL. I, NO. 4, SEPTEMBER 1895) ***</div>
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