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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..d7b82bc --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,4 @@ +*.txt text eol=lf +*.htm text eol=lf +*.html text eol=lf +*.md text eol=lf diff --git a/LICENSE.txt b/LICENSE.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6312041 --- /dev/null +++ b/LICENSE.txt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +This eBook, including all associated images, markup, improvements, +metadata, and any other content or labor, has been confirmed to be +in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES. + +Procedures for determining public domain status are described in +the "Copyright How-To" at https://www.gutenberg.org. + +No investigation has been made concerning possible copyrights in +jurisdictions other than the United States. Anyone seeking to utilize +this eBook outside of the United States should confirm copyright +status under the laws that apply to them. diff --git a/README.md b/README.md new file mode 100644 index 0000000..8714a95 --- /dev/null +++ b/README.md @@ -0,0 +1,2 @@ +Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for +eBook #67325 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/67325) diff --git a/old/67325-0.txt b/old/67325-0.txt deleted file mode 100644 index 97f2788..0000000 --- a/old/67325-0.txt +++ /dev/null @@ -1,682 +0,0 @@ -The Project Gutenberg eBook of Kid Stuff, by Winston Marks - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and -most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions -whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms -of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at -www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you -will have to check the laws of the country where you are located before -using this eBook. - -Title: Kid Stuff - -Author: Winston Marks - -Release Date: February 5, 2022 [eBook #67325] - -Language: English - -Produced by: Greg Weeks, Mary Meehan and the Online Distributed - Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net - -*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK KID STUFF *** - - - - - - KID STUFF - - By WINSTON MARKS - - _Practice makes perfect in some - cases--but not in this eerie instance!_ - - [Transcriber's Note: This etext was produced from - Infinity Science Fiction, November 1955. - Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that - the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.] - - -Why me? Why, out of 300 billion people on earth, why did they have to -pick on _me_? - -And if it had to happen, why couldn't it have happened before I met -Betty and fell in love with her? You see, Betty and I were to be -married tomorrow. We _were_ to have been married. Tomorrow. - -Tomorrow, indeed! What a ghastly thought that is! How can I explain -to Betty--to anyone! I can't face her, and what could I say on the -telephone? "Sorry, Betty, I can't marry you. I'm no longer--quite -human." - -Quit joking, Kelley! This is for real. You're sober and awake and it -did happen. Marrying Betty is out of the question even if she'd have -you the way you are. You're not _that_ two-faced! - -Quit standing in front of the mirror, naked and shaking, looking -for scars, counting your fingers and toes. You've taken a hundred -inventories, and it always comes out wrong. And it always will, -unless ... unless _they_ come back. But that's hopeless. They'd never -find me again. Not out of all the people on earth. Besides, they -didn't seem to give a damn. No more than a kid gives a damn what -happens to a lump of modelling clay when he gets bored squeezing it -into this shape and that. - -Where did they come from? Or, judging from their "talk," _when_ did -they come from? And would it do me any good if I knew? - - * * * * * - -I was sitting there in my bachelor apartment, drinking a can of -beer and trying to work a crossword puzzle to get sleepy. I wasn't -especially jittery like the groom is always supposed to be on the eve -of his wedding. Just wide awake at midnight, wanting to get sleepy so I -could get some real rest when I went to bed. - -Just sitting there trying to think of a two-letter word for "sun-god." -And that made me think of the gold in Betty's hair when the sun was on -it at the beach. And pretty soon I was just staring into space, aching -for Betty, wishing the next twelve hours of my life would vanish and we -could be together, heading for our little cottage at the lake. - -Staring into space.... Then it wasn't just space. There were these two -big ball bearings in front of me, about three feet in diameter, if you -could say they had a diameter. They looked like ball bearings because -their surfaces were shiny, mirrorlike steel. But they had unevenly -spaced, smooth bumps. Something like the random knobs on a potato, so -they weren't really round at all. - -The light from my lamp reflected crazily, and my own image gaped back -at me from their distorted, reflecting curves. Like the fun-mirrors at -the crazy-house, only crazier ... and not funny at all. Fear is never -funny. And I was afraid. I'll swear I could _taste_ the terror. It was -salty on my tongue. When I tried to cry out, the roof of my mouth felt -like old concrete. - -Then one of them spoke. "It's alive! Intelligent! It senses our -presence!" - -I was receiving pure thought, not words. But man thinks only in words. -And their thoughts fished suitable words from my subconscious to frame -them for my assimilation. - -Telepathy? Impossible! What common points of reference could I have -with these two unthinkably alien life-forms? - -The answer whipped back at me on an intuitive, sub-vocal level: Thought -is a universal energy manifestation. _Language is only the clumsy -vehicle for thought._ - -Between me and the aliens lay no such barrier. - -"Obviously intelligent," the other agreed. "Feel those gamma -radiations? Too bad they're so weak. It would be interesting if he -could communicate with us." - -I stammered aloud, "But--but I _can_ communicate with you. I understand -every--" - -They were paying no attention to my raspy words. "Yes, that's typical -of these ancient, organic life-forms. As I recall, they use some form -of physical vibration of their gaseous medium for communicating among -themselves--" - -"Speaking of which," the other interrupted, "this particular gaseous -medium seems to contain oxygen. We'd best not remain overlong or we'll -corrode and catch hell when we return." - -"Exude a little nickel if it irritates you. We'll catch hell anyway -when mother--" - -Yes, that's the word that came to me! - -"--discovers _when_ we've been. I'm curious about these flesh and blood -creatures. I wonder who invented this clumsy monstrosity." - - * * * * * - -He meant me. He rolled a foot nearer, and the other followed with an -uncertain wobble. "I turned out better in the third grade." - -"Liar! You nearly flunked meta-plastics." - -"Well, you did flunk it, so who are you to--?" - -"Just don't be over-critical. I think this one looks fairly practical. -Well-balanced--" - -"That's just what I mean. Observe the unimaginative bisymmetry. Two -arms, two legs, two eyes, five fingers on each hand, five toes on each -foot. Surely, the inventor was a mechanic and no artist. In this light -gravity there was no need for--" - -"And how would you improve the design, your high-and-mightiness?" - -"First let's remove the covering." - -My clothes left my body gently, but with the sound of violent tearing. -In two seconds I sat naked, my garments laid back like split bandages. - -I shouted, "See here, for God's sakes!" - -The aliens had made no visible move, yet they had wielded powerful -forces to strip everything I wore from my body, shirt, slacks, -underwear and even my shoes ... without so much as pinching my flesh. - -I leaped to my feet naked as a straw. They were between me and the -door, but they seemed so clumsy. - -"Watch it! He's alarmed. Don't let him escape!" - -"Try and stop me!" I screamed, tensing my muscles for a leap over the -pair of intruders. Suddenly the air about my sweating body seemed to -thicken to the viscosity of molasses. I could breathe it all right, but -quick motion was denied me. My grand leap died before my right foot -left the floor. I retreated to my chair in slow-motion panic, sinking -slowly through the clabbered atmosphere, to a sitting position on my -torn clothing. - -"Yes, a very clumsy, unesthetic life-form. In fact the bisymmetry -fairly nauseates me. Granted that the two arms are practical, doubtless -one or the other does 90% of all work. So why have them of equal -importance? See here, I'll demonstrate...." - -"Wait!" the other cautioned. "This is a sentient creature. You can't -operate without...." - -"Of course not!" - -Something buzzed in my spine, and I blanked out. For the space of one -breath, it seemed. - -"There, that's better." - -"I guess I must agree with you." - -A faint tingle in my left arm caused me to stare at it. Unbelievingly! -Its length was the same, but its diameter was reduced to two-thirds, -and there were two fingers missing on the hand. The opposable thumb -remained, but it now had more the appearance of a claw than a human -hand. I tried to scream, but the sound was a glutinous bubble of air -that never reached my lips. - -"How about the pedal appendages?" - -"Well--" there was some hesitation. "Considering the method of -locomotion, bisymmetry seems more justified there. However, why -bilateral? Why not quadrilateral?" - -"Because the organs of sight face only one way." - -"I can fix that, too." - -My spine buzzed, and when I looked down again a flood of peculiar -changes had taken place. My ankles terminated in the middle of my feet, -and my heels had disappeared. In their place were toes. - -"You see, with the double-hinged knee-joint, he can travel forward or -backward now without pivoting...." - -Then I became aware that I could _look_ forward and backward at the -same time. - -"That thing in the middle is certainly superfluous." - -"Yes." - -Buzz! - -It was gone. - -"A tentacle fastened, say, to the right hip-bone could be very useful." - -Buzz! - -My right hip tingled. From it protruded a whip-like appendage some -eight feet long, brown and leathery, tapering to the diameter of a -pencil and terminating in a pink flesh-pad richly supplied with sensory -buds. I could feel every hair in the nap of the carpet on which it -rested--feel, taste, smell and hear! Four sense organs in one! - -"Now we are making progress!" came the exclamation. - -Buzz! Buzz! Buzz! - -The instant-seeming anesthetic moments came upon me in quick -succession, and each left me bereft of some standard, human equipment -or in the possession of some extra-normal addition to my anatomy--with -no more sensation than the slight tingle I have mentioned. - -From their mental remarks I conclude that I lost my vermiform appendix, -tonsils and a mole on my left shoulder blade. Most of the other items -which I acquired were too grotesque to describe further. - -"The two additional cardiac structures and the adrenal adjustments -should assure some likelihood of immortality," one of the intruders was -explaining. - -"Which would probably bring about over-population in ten generations," -the other reminded him. - -"Ah, yes. I should compensate for that." - -Buzz, and he did! - -"I'm corroding." - -"Exude some chrome as I told you." - -"I think I hear mother calling, anyway. Let's go before she--" - - * * * * * - -They were too late. A third bumpy ball-bearing materialized behind the -two aliens, and instantly a barrage of maternal scolding dominated the -ether. "I've been searching the whole continuum for you two! What are -you doing back here?" - -"We were just about to return, Mother." - -"That's the truth, Mother. We just broke through here so we could -practice our advanced--" - -"Practice!" Mother exclaimed. "Practice on this poor, primitive, -organic creature?" - -I felt poor and primitive indeed. Paralyzed with fear, my only wonder -now was that apparently I had retained my sanity throughout this -waking nightmare. - -"We didn't hurt him." - -"You put him back the way you found him, do you understand? Do it right -this instant!" - -"Yes, Mother. Let's see, how _did_ we find him?" - -"Simple bilateral symmetry, stupid!" - -"Oh, yes, two of everything except--" - -"Hold it! Remember the anaesthesia." - -Buzz! - - * * * * * - -When I awakened this time they were gone. My electric clock hummed -softly on the mantle, revealing the nonsensical information that less -than an hour had passed since my visitors first arrived. - -I staggered to my feet, bracing myself against the thick air, but the -air was just ordinary, thin, substanceless air again. My hand dropped -to my right hip. - -The tentacle was gone. - -"Thank God!" I breathed, and for an instant my common sense tried to -insist that I had merely fallen asleep for a few minutes and dreamed -the whole fantastic sequence. - -But no! Why would I be stark naked? And why were my clothes lying -ruined in my chair like bandages split with a huge razor? - -I clenched my left fist and gained comfort from the reassuring pressure -of four fingers and a thumb in my palm. But then I stepped into my -bedroom and stood before my full-length mirror--where I have stood -rooted ever since. - -And the question revolves in my brain, punctuated only by my profanity -and sobs of despair. How can I marry Betty now? How can I face her, let -alone marry her? - -What woman on earth could bring herself to marry a man with no -navel ... and two heads? - -*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK KID STUFF *** - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will -be renamed. - -Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright -law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, -so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the -United States without permission and without paying copyright -royalties. Special rules, set forth in the General Terms of Use part -of this license, apply to copying and distributing Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works to protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm -concept and trademark. Project Gutenberg is a registered trademark, -and may not be used if you charge for an eBook, except by following -the terms of the trademark license, including paying royalties for use -of the Project Gutenberg trademark. 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You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms -of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online -at <a href="https://www.gutenberg.org">www.gutenberg.org</a>. If you -are not located in the United States, you will have to check the laws of the -country where you are located before using this eBook. -</div> - -<p style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:1em; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Title: Kid Stuff</p> -<p style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:0; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em'>Author: Winston Marks</p> -<p style='display:block; text-indent:0; margin:1em 0'>Release Date: February 5, 2022 [eBook #67325]</p> -<p style='display:block; text-indent:0; margin:1em 0'>Language: English</p> - <p style='display:block; margin-top:1em; margin-bottom:0; margin-left:2em; text-indent:-2em; text-align:left'>Produced by: Greg Weeks, Mary Meehan and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net</p> -<div style='margin-top:2em; margin-bottom:4em'>*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK KID STUFF ***</div> - -<div class="titlepage"> -<h1>KID STUFF</h1> - -<h2>By WINSTON MARKS</h2> - -<p><i>Practice makes perfect in some<br /> -cases—but not in this eerie instance!</i></p> - -<p>[Transcriber's Note: This etext was produced from<br /> -Infinity Science Fiction, November 1955.<br /> -Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that<br /> -the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.]</p> - -</div> - -<hr class="chap" /> - -<p>Why me? Why, out of 300 billion people on earth, why did they have to -pick on <i>me</i>?</p> - -<p>And if it had to happen, why couldn't it have happened before I met -Betty and fell in love with her? You see, Betty and I were to be -married tomorrow. We <i>were</i> to have been married. Tomorrow.</p> - -<p>Tomorrow, indeed! What a ghastly thought that is! How can I explain -to Betty—to anyone! I can't face her, and what could I say on the -telephone? "Sorry, Betty, I can't marry you. I'm no longer—quite -human."</p> - -<p>Quit joking, Kelley! This is for real. You're sober and awake and it -did happen. Marrying Betty is out of the question even if she'd have -you the way you are. You're not <i>that</i> two-faced!</p> - -<p>Quit standing in front of the mirror, naked and shaking, looking -for scars, counting your fingers and toes. You've taken a hundred -inventories, and it always comes out wrong. And it always will, -unless ... unless <i>they</i> come back. But that's hopeless. They'd never -find me again. Not out of all the people on earth. Besides, they -didn't seem to give a damn. No more than a kid gives a damn what -happens to a lump of modelling clay when he gets bored squeezing it -into this shape and that.</p> - -<p>Where did they come from? Or, judging from their "talk," <i>when</i> did -they come from? And would it do me any good if I knew?</p> - -<hr class="tb" /> - -<p>I was sitting there in my bachelor apartment, drinking a can of -beer and trying to work a crossword puzzle to get sleepy. I wasn't -especially jittery like the groom is always supposed to be on the eve -of his wedding. Just wide awake at midnight, wanting to get sleepy so I -could get some real rest when I went to bed.</p> - -<p>Just sitting there trying to think of a two-letter word for "sun-god." -And that made me think of the gold in Betty's hair when the sun was on -it at the beach. And pretty soon I was just staring into space, aching -for Betty, wishing the next twelve hours of my life would vanish and we -could be together, heading for our little cottage at the lake.</p> - -<p>Staring into space.... Then it wasn't just space. There were these two -big ball bearings in front of me, about three feet in diameter, if you -could say they had a diameter. They looked like ball bearings because -their surfaces were shiny, mirrorlike steel. But they had unevenly -spaced, smooth bumps. Something like the random knobs on a potato, so -they weren't really round at all.</p> - -<p>The light from my lamp reflected crazily, and my own image gaped back -at me from their distorted, reflecting curves. Like the fun-mirrors at -the crazy-house, only crazier ... and not funny at all. Fear is never -funny. And I was afraid. I'll swear I could <i>taste</i> the terror. It was -salty on my tongue. When I tried to cry out, the roof of my mouth felt -like old concrete.</p> - -<p>Then one of them spoke. "It's alive! Intelligent! It senses our -presence!"</p> - -<p>I was receiving pure thought, not words. But man thinks only in words. -And their thoughts fished suitable words from my subconscious to frame -them for my assimilation.</p> - -<p>Telepathy? Impossible! What common points of reference could I have -with these two unthinkably alien life-forms?</p> - -<p>The answer whipped back at me on an intuitive, sub-vocal level: Thought -is a universal energy manifestation. <i>Language is only the clumsy -vehicle for thought.</i></p> - -<p>Between me and the aliens lay no such barrier.</p> - -<p>"Obviously intelligent," the other agreed. "Feel those gamma -radiations? Too bad they're so weak. It would be interesting if he -could communicate with us."</p> - -<p>I stammered aloud, "But—but I <i>can</i> communicate with you. I understand -every—"</p> - -<p>They were paying no attention to my raspy words. "Yes, that's typical -of these ancient, organic life-forms. As I recall, they use some form -of physical vibration of their gaseous medium for communicating among -themselves—"</p> - -<p>"Speaking of which," the other interrupted, "this particular gaseous -medium seems to contain oxygen. We'd best not remain overlong or we'll -corrode and catch hell when we return."</p> - -<p>"Exude a little nickel if it irritates you. We'll catch hell anyway -when mother—"</p> - -<p>Yes, that's the word that came to me!</p> - -<p>"—discovers <i>when</i> we've been. I'm curious about these flesh and blood -creatures. I wonder who invented this clumsy monstrosity."</p> - -<hr class="tb" /> - -<p>He meant me. He rolled a foot nearer, and the other followed with an -uncertain wobble. "I turned out better in the third grade."</p> - -<p>"Liar! You nearly flunked meta-plastics."</p> - -<p>"Well, you did flunk it, so who are you to—?"</p> - -<p>"Just don't be over-critical. I think this one looks fairly practical. -Well-balanced—"</p> - -<p>"That's just what I mean. Observe the unimaginative bisymmetry. Two -arms, two legs, two eyes, five fingers on each hand, five toes on each -foot. Surely, the inventor was a mechanic and no artist. In this light -gravity there was no need for—"</p> - -<p>"And how would you improve the design, your high-and-mightiness?"</p> - -<p>"First let's remove the covering."</p> - -<p>My clothes left my body gently, but with the sound of violent tearing. -In two seconds I sat naked, my garments laid back like split bandages.</p> - -<p>I shouted, "See here, for God's sakes!"</p> - -<p>The aliens had made no visible move, yet they had wielded powerful -forces to strip everything I wore from my body, shirt, slacks, -underwear and even my shoes ... without so much as pinching my flesh.</p> - -<p>I leaped to my feet naked as a straw. They were between me and the -door, but they seemed so clumsy.</p> - -<p>"Watch it! He's alarmed. Don't let him escape!"</p> - -<p>"Try and stop me!" I screamed, tensing my muscles for a leap over the -pair of intruders. Suddenly the air about my sweating body seemed to -thicken to the viscosity of molasses. I could breathe it all right, but -quick motion was denied me. My grand leap died before my right foot -left the floor. I retreated to my chair in slow-motion panic, sinking -slowly through the clabbered atmosphere, to a sitting position on my -torn clothing.</p> - -<p>"Yes, a very clumsy, unesthetic life-form. In fact the bisymmetry -fairly nauseates me. Granted that the two arms are practical, doubtless -one or the other does 90% of all work. So why have them of equal -importance? See here, I'll demonstrate...."</p> - -<p>"Wait!" the other cautioned. "This is a sentient creature. You can't -operate without...."</p> - -<p>"Of course not!"</p> - -<p>Something buzzed in my spine, and I blanked out. For the space of one -breath, it seemed.</p> - -<p>"There, that's better."</p> - -<p>"I guess I must agree with you."</p> - -<p>A faint tingle in my left arm caused me to stare at it. Unbelievingly! -Its length was the same, but its diameter was reduced to two-thirds, -and there were two fingers missing on the hand. The opposable thumb -remained, but it now had more the appearance of a claw than a human -hand. I tried to scream, but the sound was a glutinous bubble of air -that never reached my lips.</p> - -<p>"How about the pedal appendages?"</p> - -<p>"Well—" there was some hesitation. "Considering the method of -locomotion, bisymmetry seems more justified there. However, why -bilateral? Why not quadrilateral?"</p> - -<p>"Because the organs of sight face only one way."</p> - -<p>"I can fix that, too."</p> - -<p>My spine buzzed, and when I looked down again a flood of peculiar -changes had taken place. My ankles terminated in the middle of my feet, -and my heels had disappeared. In their place were toes.</p> - -<p>"You see, with the double-hinged knee-joint, he can travel forward or -backward now without pivoting...."</p> - -<p>Then I became aware that I could <i>look</i> forward and backward at the -same time.</p> - -<p>"That thing in the middle is certainly superfluous."</p> - -<p>"Yes."</p> - -<p>Buzz!</p> - -<p>It was gone.</p> - -<p>"A tentacle fastened, say, to the right hip-bone could be very useful."</p> - -<p>Buzz!</p> - -<p>My right hip tingled. From it protruded a whip-like appendage some -eight feet long, brown and leathery, tapering to the diameter of a -pencil and terminating in a pink flesh-pad richly supplied with sensory -buds. I could feel every hair in the nap of the carpet on which it -rested—feel, taste, smell and hear! Four sense organs in one!</p> - -<p>"Now we are making progress!" came the exclamation.</p> - -<p>Buzz! Buzz! Buzz!</p> - -<p>The instant-seeming anesthetic moments came upon me in quick -succession, and each left me bereft of some standard, human equipment -or in the possession of some extra-normal addition to my anatomy—with -no more sensation than the slight tingle I have mentioned.</p> - -<p>From their mental remarks I conclude that I lost my vermiform appendix, -tonsils and a mole on my left shoulder blade. Most of the other items -which I acquired were too grotesque to describe further.</p> - -<p>"The two additional cardiac structures and the adrenal adjustments -should assure some likelihood of immortality," one of the intruders was -explaining.</p> - -<p>"Which would probably bring about over-population in ten generations," -the other reminded him.</p> - -<p>"Ah, yes. I should compensate for that."</p> - -<p>Buzz, and he did!</p> - -<p>"I'm corroding."</p> - -<p>"Exude some chrome as I told you."</p> - -<p>"I think I hear mother calling, anyway. Let's go before she—"</p> - -<hr class="tb" /> - -<p>They were too late. A third bumpy ball-bearing materialized behind the -two aliens, and instantly a barrage of maternal scolding dominated the -ether. "I've been searching the whole continuum for you two! What are -you doing back here?"</p> - -<p>"We were just about to return, Mother."</p> - -<p>"That's the truth, Mother. We just broke through here so we could -practice our advanced—"</p> - -<p>"Practice!" Mother exclaimed. "Practice on this poor, primitive, -organic creature?"</p> - -<p>I felt poor and primitive indeed. Paralyzed with fear, my only wonder -now was that apparently I had retained my sanity throughout this -waking nightmare.</p> - -<p>"We didn't hurt him."</p> - -<p>"You put him back the way you found him, do you understand? Do it right -this instant!"</p> - -<p>"Yes, Mother. Let's see, how <i>did</i> we find him?"</p> - -<p>"Simple bilateral symmetry, stupid!"</p> - -<p>"Oh, yes, two of everything except—"</p> - -<p>"Hold it! Remember the anaesthesia."</p> - -<p>Buzz!</p> - -<hr class="tb" /> - -<p>When I awakened this time they were gone. My electric clock hummed -softly on the mantle, revealing the nonsensical information that less -than an hour had passed since my visitors first arrived.</p> - -<p>I staggered to my feet, bracing myself against the thick air, but the -air was just ordinary, thin, substanceless air again. My hand dropped -to my right hip.</p> - -<p>The tentacle was gone.</p> - -<p>"Thank God!" I breathed, and for an instant my common sense tried to -insist that I had merely fallen asleep for a few minutes and dreamed -the whole fantastic sequence.</p> - -<p>But no! Why would I be stark naked? And why were my clothes lying -ruined in my chair like bandages split with a huge razor?</p> - -<p>I clenched my left fist and gained comfort from the reassuring pressure -of four fingers and a thumb in my palm. But then I stepped into my -bedroom and stood before my full-length mirror—where I have stood -rooted ever since.</p> - -<p>And the question revolves in my brain, punctuated only by my profanity -and sobs of despair. How can I marry Betty now? How can I face her, let -alone marry her?</p> - -<p>What woman on earth could bring herself to marry a man with no -navel ... and two heads?</p> - -<div style='display:block; margin-top:4em'>*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK KID STUFF ***</div> -<div style='text-align:left'> - -<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> -Updated editions will replace the previous one—the old editions will -be renamed. -</div> - -<div style='display:block; margin:1em 0'> -Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright -law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, -so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United -States without permission and without paying copyright -royalties. Special rules, set forth in the General Terms of Use part -of this license, apply to copying and distributing Project -Gutenberg™ electronic works to protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG™ -concept and trademark. 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