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If you are not located in the United States, you -will have to check the laws of the country where you are located before -using this eBook. - -Title: Gulliver's Travels - -Author: Jonathan Swift - -Illustrator: Milo Winter - -Release Date: May 31, 2021 [eBook #65473] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: UTF-8 - -Produced by: Juliet Sutherland and the Online Distributed Proofreading - Team at https://www.pgdp.net - -*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK GULLIVER'S TRAVELS *** - - - - - -[Illustration: “_I found my arms and legs were strongly fastened on each -side to the ground_” - -_Page 8_] - - - - - THE WINDERMERE SERIES - - GULLIVER’S - TRAVELS - - By JONATHAN SWIFT - - with illustrations by - MILO WINTER - - RAND McNALLY & COMPANY - New York Chicago San Francisco - - _Copyright, 1912, by_ - RAND McNALLY & COMPANY - - All rights reserved - Edition of 1936 - - Made in U. S. A. - - - - -THE CONTENTS - - - PAGE - - _The List of Illustrations_ xi - - _A Biographical Note_ 1 - - A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT - - CHAPTER I - - The Author gives some Account of Himself and Family—His first - Inducements to Travel—He is shipwrecked, and swims for his - Life—Gets safe on Shore in the Country of Lilliput—Is made a - Prisoner, and carried up the Country 5 - - CHAPTER II - - The Emperor of Lilliput, attended by several of the Nobility, - comes to see the Author in his Confinement—The Emperor’s Person - and Habits described—Learned Men appointed to teach the Author - their Language—He gains Favor by his Mild Disposition—His - Pockets are searched, and his Sword and Pistols taken from him 18 - - CHAPTER III - - The Author diverts the Emperor, and his Nobility of both Sexes, - in a very Uncommon Manner—The Diversions of the Court of - Lilliput described—The Author has his Liberty granted him, upon - Certain Conditions 30 - - CHAPTER IV - - Mildendo, the Metropolis of Lilliput, described, together with - the Emperor’s Palace—A Conversation between the Author and a - Principal Secretary, concerning the Affairs of that Empire—The - Author’s Offers to serve the Emperor in his Wars 40 - - CHAPTER V - - The Author, by an Extraordinary Stratagem, prevents an - Invasion—A high Title of Honor is conferred upon him—Ambassadors - arrive from the Emperor of Blefuscu, and sue for Peace 47 - - CHAPTER VI - - Of the Inhabitants of Lilliput; their Learning, Laws, and - Customs; the Manner of educating their Children—The Author’s - Way of Living in that Country—His Vindication of a Great Lady 54 - - CHAPTER VII - - The Author being informed of a Design to accuse him of High - Treason, makes his Escape to Blefuscu—His Reception there 67 - - CHAPTER VIII - - The Author, by a lucky Accident, finds Means to leave Blefuscu; - and, after some Difficulties, returns safe to his Native - Country 77 - - A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAG - - CHAPTER I - - A great Storm described; the Longboat sent to fetch Water; - the Author goes with it to discover the Country—He is left - on Shore, is seized by one of the Natives, and carried to a - Farmer’s House—His Reception there, with several Accidents that - happened to him—A Description of the Inhabitants 85 - - CHAPTER II - - A Description of the Farmer’s Daughter—The Author carried to a - Market Town, and then to the Metropolis—The Particulars of his - Journey 100 - - CHAPTER III - - The Author sent for to Court—The Queen buys him of his Master, - the Farmer, and presents him to the King—He disputes with His - Majesty’s great Scholars—An Apartment at Court provided for the - Author—He is in high Favor with the Queen—He stands up for the - Honor of his own Country—His Quarrels with the Queen’s Dwarf 107 - - CHAPTER IV - - The Country described—A Proposal for correcting Modern Maps—The - King’s Palace, and some Account of the Metropolis—The Author’s - Way of Traveling—The Chief Temple described 120 - - CHAPTER V - - Several Adventures that happened to the Author—The Execution of - a Criminal—The Author shows his Skill in Navigation 126 - - CHAPTER VI - - Several Contrivances of the Author to please the King and - Queen—He shows his Skill in Music—The King inquires into the - State of Europe, which the Author relates to him—The King’s - Observations thereon 136 - - CHAPTER VII - - The Author’s Love of his Country—He makes a Proposal of much - Advantage to the King, which is rejected—The King’s great - Ignorance in Politics—The Learning of that Country very - imperfect and confined—The Laws and Military Affairs and - Parties in the State 147 - - CHAPTER VIII - - The King and Queen make a Progress to the Frontiers—The Author - attends them—The Manner in which he leaves the Country very - particularly related—He returns to England 155 - - A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, BALNIBARBI, LUGGNAGG, GLUBBDUBDRIB AND JAPAN - - CHAPTER I - - The Author sets out on his Third Voyage—Is taken by Pirates—The - Malice of a Dutchman—His Arrival at an Island—He is received - into Laputa 169 - - CHAPTER II - - The Humors and Dispositions of the Laputians described—An - Account of their Learning—Of the King and his Court—The - Author’s Reception there—The Inhabitants subject to Fears and - Disquietudes—An Account of the Women 176 - - CHAPTER III - - A Phenomenon solved by modern Philosophy and Astronomy—The - Laputians’ great Improvements in the Latter—The King’s Method - of suppressing Insurrections 187 - - CHAPTER IV - - The Author leaves Laputa—Is conveyed to Balnibarbi—Arrives at - the Metropolis—A Description of the Metropolis and the Country - adjoining—The Author hospitably received by a Great Lord—His - Conversation with that Lord 194 - - CHAPTER V - - The Author permitted to see the Grand Academy of Lagado—The - Academy largely described—The Arts wherein the Professors - employ themselves 201 - - CHAPTER VI - - A further Account of the Academy—The Author proposes some - Improvements, which are honorably received 209 - - CHAPTER VII - - The Author leaves Lagado—Arrives at Maldonada—No Ship ready—He - takes a short Voyage to Glubbdubdrib—His Reception by the - Governor 216 - - CHAPTER VIII - - A further Account of Glubbdubdrib—Ancient and modern History - corrected 221 - - CHAPTER IX - - The Author’s Return to Maldonada—Sails to the Kingdom of - Luggnagg—The Author confined—He is sent for to Court—The Manner - of his Admittance—The King’s great Lenity to his Subjects 228 - - CHAPTER X - - The Luggnaggians commended—A Particular Description of the - _Struldbrugs_, with many Conversations between the Author and - some Eminent Persons upon that Subject 233 - - CHAPTER XI - - The Author leaves Luggnagg, and sails to Japan—From thence he - returns in a Dutch Ship to Amsterdam, and from Amsterdam to - England 244 - - A VOYAGE TO THE COUNTRY OF THE HOUYHNHNMS - - CHAPTER I - - The Author sets out as Captain of a Ship—His Men conspire - against him, confine him a Long Time to his Cabin, and set him - on Shore in an Unknown Land—He travels up in the Country—The - _Yahoos_, a strange Sort of Animal, described—The Author meets - two Houyhnhnms 249 - - CHAPTER II - - The Author conducted by a Houyhnhnm to his House—The House - described—The Author’s Reception—The Food of the Houyhnhnms—The - Author in Distress for Want of Meat is at last relieved—His - Manner of Feeding in this Country 257 - - CHAPTER III - - The Author studious to learn the Language—The Houyhnhnm his - Master assists in teaching him—The Language described—Several - Houyhnhnms of Quality come out of Curiosity to see the - Author—He gives his Master a Short Account of his Voyage 265 - - CHAPTER IV - - The Houyhnhnms’ Notion of Truth and Falsehood—The Author’s - Discourse disapproved by his Master—The Author gives a more - particular Account of himself, and the Accidents of his Voyage 272 - - CHAPTER V - - The Author at his Master’s Command, informs him of the State - of England—The Causes of War among the Princes of Europe—The - Author begins to explain the English Constitution 279 - - CHAPTER VI - - A Continuation of the State of England under Queen Anne—The - Character of a first Minister of State in some European Courts 289 - - CHAPTER VII - - The Author’s great Love of his Native Country—His Master’s - Observations upon the Constitution and Administration of - England, as described by the Author, with parallel Cases and - Comparisons—His Master’s Observations upon Human Nature 297 - - CHAPTER VIII - - The Author relates several Particulars of the _Yahoos_—The - great Virtues of the Houyhnhnms—The Education and Exercise of - their Youth—Their General Assembly 305 - - CHAPTER IX - - A grand Debate at the General Assembly of the Houyhnhnms, and - how it was determined—The Learning of the Houyhnhnms—Their - Buildings—Their Manner of Burials—The Defectiveness of their - Language 311 - - CHAPTER X - - The Author’s Economy and Happy Life among the Houyhnhnms—His - great Improvement in Virtue by conversing with them—Their - Conversations—The Author has Notice given him by his Master - that he must depart from the Country—He falls into a Swoon for - Grief, but submits—He contrives and finishes a Canoe by the - Help of a Fellow Servant, and puts to Sea at a Venture 318 - - CHAPTER XI - - The Author’s dangerous Voyage—He arrives at New Holland, - hoping to settle there—Is wounded with an Arrow by one of - the Natives—Is seized and carried by Force into a Portuguese - Ship—The great Civilities of the Captain—The Author arrives at - England 327 - - CHAPTER XII - - The Author’s Veracity—His Design in publishing this Work—His - Censure of those Travelers who swerve from the Truth—The Author - clears himself from any Sinister Ends in writing—An Objection - answered—The Method of planting Colonies—His Native Country - commended—The Right of the Crown to those Countries described - by the Author is justified—The Difficulty of conquering - them—The Author takes his Last Leave of the Reader; proposes - his Manner of Living for the Future; gives Good Advice, and - concludes 337 - - - - -THE LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS - - - - _Facing_ - - “I FOUND MY ARMS AND LEGS WERE STRONGLY FASTENED ON EACH SIDE - TO THE GROUND” _Title_ - - “I LIKEWISE DELIVERED UP MY WATCH, WHICH THE EMPEROR WAS VERY - CURIOUS TO SEE” 26 - - “THEY PERCEIVED THE WHOLE FLEET MOVING IN ORDER” 50 - - “I HAVE PASSED MANY AN AFTERNOON VERY AGREEABLY IN THESE - CONVERSATIONS” 64 - - “THESE HORRIBLE ANIMALS HAD THE BOLDNESS TO ATTACK ME ON - BOTH SIDES” 96 - - “I BANGED IT A GOOD WHILE WITH ONE OF MY SCULLS” 128 - - “I HEARD A NOISE OVER MY HEAD LIKE THE CLAPPING OF WINGS” 160 - - “AT LAST WE ENTERED THE PALACE” 182 - - “HE HAD BEEN EIGHT YEARS UPON A PROJECT FOR EXTRACTING - SUNBEAMS OUT OF CUCUMBERS” 206 - - “I SAW COMING TOWARDS THE HOUSE A KIND OF VEHICLE DRAWN - LIKE A SLEDGE BY FOUR _YAHOOS_” 260 - - - - -A BIOGRAPHICAL NOTE - - -Jonathan Swift, whose name stands unchallenged at the head of the list -of English satirists, was born on Irish soil, for it was in Dublin on -November 30, 1667, that he opened his eyes upon a career in which fortune -and misfortune alternated in swift succession for seventy-eight years. -Before his birth his father died, and his youth was embittered by the -grudging provision made by an uncle for his education. Though a keen -lover of history and poetry, he held in high disdain the ordinary study -routine and the various regulations which govern institutions, obtaining -his degree from Trinity College in Ireland’s capital city only by grace -of special indulgence. - -Restless and resentful and unhappy, when the Revolution of 1688 drove him -forth from the Emerald Isle, he sought employment in England, and while -secretary to Sir William Temple, a statesman of no ordinary culture and -ability, qualified himself for the literary work which has made his name -famous for two centuries. Then wearying of dependence, he returned to -Ireland and resolved to enter the Church. - -As prelate and later as politician his name never rang with the -praise which early rewarded the efforts of his pen, for as a master -of “humor, irony, and invective he has no superior.” His love affairs -were disastrous and reflect only discredit upon his manhood, but to -the strength of his passion for Esther Johnson, or “Stella,” whom it -is contended that he secretly married but never acknowledged, and for -Vanessa—Miss Vanhomrigh—are due the great works that immortalized them. - -_The Tale of the Tub_ first betrayed his transcendent genius and -irresistible wit, but the grave humor of all his other productions which -were not really serious in character, paled before the keen satire and -ludicrous exaggeration of _Gulliver’s Travels_. Its covert ridicule of -rulers, courts, statesmen, and political organizations was so severe -and cut so ruthlessly and cruelly deep, that only its diabolical -cleverness prevented its suppression and instead lent it an unprecedented -popularity. It is so true, so simple in expression, its searching irony -so based on the frailties of human nature; it is so comic, and yet its -tone so whimsically solemn, that it provides prodigious enjoyment for -thousands who never catch a glimpse of—much less grasp—its inner meaning. - -But the veiled significance is unmistakably there, for the voyage to -Lilliput is merely a revelation of the policy of the English court during -the reign of George I; the trip to Brobdingnag affords opportunity for -picturing an ideal ruler and government; the journey to Laputa holds up -to contumely the proceedings of the British Royal Society, while the -visit to the Houyhnhnms is a rabid satire against humanity. - -And after achievements which deservedly won the plaudits of the master -brains among his contemporaries, and continue to reflect on him lasting -glory, this gifted man four years before his death on October 19, -1745, sank into a condition of dementia. But though the powers of his -marvelous, eccentric mind weakened and finally failed, “his works do -follow him,” for he contributed to the world’s literature one of the most -delightful children’s books ever written, and his name echoes through -history as the clerical exposer of human frailties in a manner to call -forth only innocent mirth. - - - - -A VOYAGE TO LILLIPUT - - - - -CHAPTER I - - THE AUTHOR GIVES SOME ACCOUNT OF HIMSELF AND FAMILY—HIS FIRST - INDUCEMENTS TO TRAVEL—HE IS SHIPWRECKED, AND SWIMS FOR HIS - LIFE—GETS SAFE ON SHORE IN THE COUNTRY OF LILLIPUT—IS MADE A - PRISONER, AND CARRIED UP THE COUNTRY. - - -My father had a small estate in Nottinghamshire; I was the third of five -sons. He sent me to Emanuel College in Cambridge, at fourteen years old, -where I resided three years, and applied myself close to my studies; but -the charge of maintaining me, although I had a very scanty allowance, -being too great for a narrow fortune, I was bound apprentice to Mr. James -Bates, an eminent surgeon in London, with whom I continued four years; -and my father now and then sending me small sums of money, I laid them -out in learning navigation, and other parts of the mathematics, useful -to those who intend to travel, as I always believed it would be, some -time or other, my fortune to do. When I left Mr. Bates, I went down to my -father; where, by the assistance of him and my uncle John, and some other -relations, I got forty pounds, and a promise of thirty pounds a year to -maintain me at Leyden; there I studied physic two years and seven months, -knowing it would be useful in long voyages. - -Soon after my return from Leyden, I was recommended by my good master, -Mr. Bates, to be surgeon to the Swallow, Captain Abraham Pannell, -commander; with whom I continued three years and a half, making a voyage -or two into the Levant, and some other parts. When I came back I resolved -to settle in London; to which Mr. Bates, my master, encouraged me, and -by him I was recommended to several patients. I took part of a small -house in the Old-Jury; and being advised to alter my condition, I married -Mistress Mary Burton, second daughter to Mr. Edmund Burton, hosier, in -Newgate Street, with whom I received four hundred pounds for a portion. - -But my good master Bates dying two years after, and I having few -friends, my business began to fail; for my conscience would not suffer -me to imitate the bad practice of too many among my brethren. Having, -therefore, consulted with my wife and some of my acquaintance, I -determined to go again to sea. I was surgeon successively in two ships, -and made several voyages, for six years, to the East and West Indies, by -which I got some addition to my fortune. My hours of leisure I spent in -reading the best authors, ancient and modern, being always provided with -a good number of books; and when I was ashore, in observing the manners -and dispositions of the people, as well as learning their language, -wherein I had a great facility, by the strength of my memory. - -The last of these voyages not proving very fortunate, I grew weary of the -sea, and intended to stay at home with my wife and family. I removed from -the Old-Jury to Fetter Lane, and from thence to Wapping, hoping to get -business among the sailors, but it would not turn to account. After three -years’ expectation that things would mend, I accepted an advantageous -offer from Captain William Prichard, master of the Antelope, who was -making a voyage to the South Sea. We set sail from Bristol, May 4, 1699, -and our voyage at first was very prosperous. - -It would not be proper, for some reasons, to trouble the reader with -the particulars of our adventures in those seas; let it suffice to -inform him, that in our passage from thence to the East Indies, we were -driven by a violent storm to the northwest of Van Diemen’s Land. By an -observation, we found ourselves in the latitude of 30 degrees 2 minutes -south. Twelve of our crew were dead by immoderate labor and ill food: the -rest were in a very weak condition. On the 5th of November, which was -the beginning of summer in those parts, the weather being very hazy, the -seamen spied a rock within half a cable’s length of the ship, but the -wind was so strong that we were driven directly upon it, and immediately -split. Six of the crew, of whom I was one, having let down the boat into -the sea, made a shift to get clear of the ship and the rock. We rowed, by -my computation, about three leagues, till we were able to work no longer, -being already spent with labor while we were in the ship. We therefore -trusted ourselves to the mercy of the waves, and in about half an hour -the boat was overset by a sudden flurry from the north. What became of my -companions in the boat, as well as of those who escaped on the rock, or -were left in the vessel, I cannot tell, but conclude they were all lost. -For my own part, I swam as fortune directed me, and was pushed forward -by wind and tide. I often let my legs drop, and could feel no bottom, -but when I was almost gone, and able to struggle no longer, I found -myself within my depth; and by this time the storm was much abated. The -declivity was so small, that I walked near a mile before I got to the -shore, which I conjectured was about eight o’clock in the evening. I then -advanced forward near half a mile, but could not discover any sign of -houses or inhabitants; at least I was in so weak a condition that I did -not observe them. I was extremely tired, and with that, and the heat of -the weather, and about half a pint of brandy that I drank as I left the -ship, I found myself much inclined to sleep. I lay down on the grass, -which was very short and soft, where I slept sounder than ever I remember -to have done in my life, and, as I reckoned, about nine hours; for when I -awakened, it was just daylight. I attempted to rise, but was not able to -stir; for, as I happened to lie on my back, I found my arms and legs were -strongly fastened on each side to the ground; and my hair, which was long -and thick, tied down in the same manner. I likewise felt several slender -ligatures across my body, from my arm-pits to my thighs. I could only -look upwards; the sun began to grow hot, and the light offended my eyes. -I heard a confused noise about me; but in the posture I lay, could see -nothing except the sky. In a little time, I felt something alive moving -on my left leg, which advancing gently forward over my breast, came -almost up to my chin; when, bending my eyes downwards as much as I could, -I perceived it to be a human creature not six inches high, with a bow and -an arrow in his hands and a quiver at his back. In the meantime I felt at -least forty more of the same kind (as I conjectured) following the first. -I was in the utmost astonishment, and roared so loud that they all ran -back in a fright, and some of them, as I was afterwards told, were hurt -by the falls they got by leaping from my sides upon the ground. However, -they soon returned, and one of them who ventured so far as to get a full -sight of my face, lifting up his hands and eyes by way of admiration, -cried out in a shrill but distinct voice, _Hekinah degul!_ The others -repeated the same words several times, but I then knew not what it meant. -I lay all this while, as the reader may believe, in great uneasiness; at -length, struggling to get loose, I had the fortune to break the strings, -and wrench out the pegs that fastened my left arm to the ground, for, by -lifting it up to my face, I discovered the methods they had taken to bind -me, and at the same time with a violent pull, which gave me excessive -pain, I a little loosened the strings that tied down my hair on the left -side, so that I was just able to turn my head about two inches. But the -creatures ran off a second time, before I could seize them; whereupon -there was a great shout in a very shrill accent, and after it had ceased -I heard one of them cry aloud, _Tolgo phonac_; when in an instant I felt -above a hundred arrows discharged on my left hand, which pricked me like -so many needles; and besides they shot another flight into the air, as -we do bombs in Europe, whereof many, I suppose, fell on my body (though -I felt them not) and some on my face, which I immediately covered with -my left hand. When this shower of arrows was over, I fell a-groaning with -grief and pain, and then striving again to get loose, they discharged -another volley larger than the first, and some of them attempted with -spears to stick me in the sides; but by good luck I had on me a buff -jerkin, which they could not pierce. I thought it the most prudent method -to lie still, and my design was to continue so till night, when, my left -hand being already loose, I could easily free myself: and as for the -inhabitants, I had reason to believe I might be a match for the greatest -army they could bring against me, if they were all of the same size with -him that I saw. But fortune disposed otherwise of me. When the people -observed I was quiet, they discharged no more arrows; but, by the noise I -heard, I knew their numbers increased; and about four yards from me, over -against my right ear, I heard a knocking for above an hour, like that of -people at work; when turning my head that way, as well as the pegs and -strings would permit me, I saw a stage erected about a foot and a half -from the ground, capable of holding four of the inhabitants, with two or -three ladders to mount it: whence one of them, who seemed to be a person -of quality, made me a long speech, whereof I understood not a syllable. -But I should have mentioned, that before the principal person began his -oration, he cried out three times, _Langro dehul san_ (these words and -the former were afterwards repeated and explained to me). Whereupon, -immediately about fifty of the inhabitants came and cut the string that -fastened the left side of my head, which gave me the liberty of turning -it to the right, and of observing the person and gesture of him that was -to speak. He appeared to be of middle age, and taller than any of the -other three who attended him, whereof one was a page that held up his -train, and seemed to be somewhat longer than my middle finger; the other -two stood one on each side to support him. He acted every part of an -orator, and I could observe many periods of threatenings, and others of -promises, pity, and kindness. I answered in a few words, but in the most -submissive manner, lifting up my left hand and both my eyes to the sun, -as calling him for a witness; and being almost famished with hunger, not -having eaten a morsel for some hours before I left the ship, I found the -demands of nature so strong upon me that I could not forbear showing my -impatience (perhaps against the strict rules of decency), by putting my -finger frequently to my mouth, to signify that I wanted food. The _hurgo_ -(for so they call a great lord, as I afterwards learned) understood -me very well. He descended from the stage, and commanded that several -ladders should be applied to my sides, on which about a hundred of the -inhabitants mounted, and walked towards my mouth, laden with baskets full -of meat, which had been provided and sent thither by the king’s orders, -upon the first intelligence he received of me. I observed there was the -flesh of several animals, but could not distinguish them by the taste. -There were shoulders, legs and loins, shaped like those of mutton, and -very well dressed, but smaller than the wings of a lark. I ate them by -two or three at a mouthful, and took three loaves at a time about the -bigness of musketballs. They supplied me as fast as they could, showing a -thousand marks of wonder and astonishment at my bulk and appetite. - -I then made another sign that I wanted drink. They found by my eating -that a small quantity would not suffice me; and being a most ingenious -people, they slung up, with great dexterity, one of their largest -hogsheads, then rolled it towards my hand, and beat out the top; I drank -it off at a draught, which I might well do, for it did not hold half a -pint, and tasted like a small wine of Burgundy, but much more delicious. -They brought me a second hogshead, which I drank in the same manner, and -made signs for more: but they had none to give me. When I had performed -these wonders they shouted for joy, and danced upon my breast, repeating -several times as they did at first, _Hekinah degul_. They made me a sign -that I should throw down the two hogsheads, but first warned the people -below to stand out of the way, crying aloud, _Borach mevola_: and when -they saw the vessels in the air there was a universal shout of _Hekinah -degul_. I confess I was often tempted, while they were passing backwards -and forwards on my body, to seize forty or fifty of the first that came -in my reach and dash them against the ground. But the remembrance of what -I had felt, which probably might not be the worst they could do, and -the promise of honor I made to them—for so I interpreted my submissive -behavior—soon drove out these imaginations. Besides, I now considered -myself as bound by the laws of hospitality to a people who had treated me -with so much expense and magnificence. However, in my thoughts I could -not sufficiently wonder at the intrepidity of these diminutive mortals, -who durst venture to mount and walk upon my body while one of my hands -was at liberty, without trembling at the very sight of so prodigious a -creature as I must appear to them. After some time, when they observed -that I made no more demands for meat, there appeared before me a person -of high rank from his imperial majesty. His excellency, having mounted -on the small of my right leg, advanced forwards up to my face, with -about a dozen of his retinue, and producing his credentials under the -signet royal, which he applied close to my eyes, spoke about ten minutes -without any signs of anger, but with a kind of determinate resolution: -often pointing forwards, which, as I afterwards found, was towards the -capital city, about half a mile distant, whither it was agreed by his -majesty in council that I must be conveyed. I answered in few words, but -to no purpose, and made a sign with my hand that was loose, putting it to -the other (but over his excellency’s head for fear of hurting him or his -train), and then to my own head and body, to signify that I desired my -liberty. It appeared that he understood me well enough, for he shook his -head by way of disapprobation, and held his hands in a posture to show -that I must be carried as a prisoner. However, he made other signs, to -let me understand that I should have meat and drink enough, and very good -treatment. Whereupon I once more thought of attempting to break my bonds; -but again, when I felt the smart of their arrows upon my face and hands, -which were all in blisters, and many of the darts still sticking in them, -and observing likewise that the number of my enemies increased, I gave -tokens to let them know that they might do with me what they pleased. -Upon this the _hurgo_ and his train withdrew, with much civility and -cheerful countenances. Soon after I heard a general shout, with frequent -repetitions of the words, _peplom selan_; and I felt great numbers of -people on my left side relaxing the cords to such a degree that I was -able to turn upon my right. But, before this, they had daubed my face -and both my hands with a sort of ointment, very pleasant to the smell, -which in a few minutes removed all the smart of their arrows. These -circumstances, added to the refreshment I had received by their victuals -and drink, which were very nourishing, disposed me to sleep. I slept -about eight hours, as I was afterwards assured; and it was no wonder, for -the physicians, by the emperor’s order, had mingled a sleepy potion in -the hogsheads of wine. - -It seems that upon the first moment I was discovered sleeping on the -ground, after my landing, the emperor had early notice of it by an -express; and determined in council that I should be tied in the manner I -have related (which was done in the night while I slept), that plenty of -meat and drink should be sent me, and a machine prepared to carry me to -the capital city. - -This resolution perhaps may appear very bold and dangerous, and I am -confident would not be imitated by any prince in Europe on the like -occasion. However, in my opinion, it was extremely prudent, as well as -generous; for supposing these people had endeavored to kill me with their -spears and arrows while I was asleep, I should certainly have awaked with -the first sense of smart, which might have so far aroused my rage and -strength as to have enabled me to break the strings wherewith I was tied; -after which, as they were not able to make resistance, so they could -expect no mercy. - -These people are most excellent mathematicians, and arrived to a great -perfection in mechanics by the countenance and encouragement of the -emperor, who is a renowned patron of learning. This prince has several -machines fixed on wheels for the carriage of trees and other great -weights. He often builds his largest men of war, whereof some are nine -feet long, in the woods where the timber grows, and has them carried -on these engines three or four hundred yards to the sea. Five hundred -carpenters and engineers were immediately set at work to prepare the -greatest engine they had. It was a frame of wood raised three inches from -the ground, about seven feet long and four wide, moving upon twenty-two -wheels. The shout I heard was upon the arrival of this engine, which, it -seems, set out in four hours after my landing. It was brought parallel -to me as I lay. But the principal difficulty was to raise and place me -in this vehicle. Eighty poles, each one foot high, were erected for -this purpose, and very strong cords, of the bigness of packthread, were -fastened by hooks to many bandages, which the workmen had girt round -my neck, my hands, my body, and my legs. Nine hundred of the strongest -men were employed to draw up these cords by many pulleys fastened on -the poles; and thus, in less than three hours, I was raised and slung -into the engine, and there tied fast. All this I was told; for while the -operation was performing I lay in a profound sleep, by the force of that -soporiferous medicine infused into my liquor. Fifteen hundred of the -emperor’s largest horses, each about four inches and a half high, were -employed to draw me towards the metropolis, which, as I said, was half a -mile distant. - -About four hours after we began our journey I awaked by a very ridiculous -accident; for the carriage being stopped awhile, to adjust something that -was out of order, two or three of the young natives had the curiosity to -see how I looked when I was asleep; they climbed up into the engine, and, -advancing very softly to my face, one of them, an officer in the guards, -put the sharp end of his half-pike a good way up into my left nostril, -which tickled my nose like a straw, and made me sneeze violently; -whereupon they stole off unperceived, and it was three weeks before -I knew the cause of my awaking so suddenly. We made a long march the -remaining part of that day, and rested at night with five hundred guards -on each side of me, half with torches, and half with bows and arrows, -ready to shoot me if I should offer to stir. The next morning at sunrise -we continued our march, and arrived within two hundred yards of the city -gates about noon. The emperor and all his court came out to meet us; but -his great officers would by no means suffer his majesty to endanger his -person by mounting on my body. - -At the place where the carriage stopped there stood an ancient temple, -esteemed to be the largest in the whole kingdom, which, having been -polluted some years before by an unnatural murder, was, according to -the zeal of those people looked upon as profane, and therefore had been -applied to common uses, and all the ornaments and furniture carried -away. In this edifice it was determined I should lodge. The great gate -fronting to the north was about four feet high and almost two feet wide, -through which I could easily creep. On each side of the gate was a small -window, not above six inches from the ground; into that on the left side -the king’s smiths conveyed fourscore and eleven chains, like those that -hang to a lady’s watch in Europe, and almost as large, which were locked -to my left leg with six-and-thirty padlocks. Over against this temple, -on the other side of the great highway, at twenty feet distance, there -was a turret at least five feet high. Here the emperor ascended, with -many principal lords of his court, to have an opportunity of viewing me, -as I was told, for I could not see them. It was reckoned that above a -hundred thousand inhabitants came out of the town upon the same errand; -and, in spite of my guards, I believe there could not be fewer than ten -thousand, at several times, who mounted my body, by the help of ladders. -But a proclamation was soon issued to forbid it upon pain of death. When -the workmen found it was impossible for me to break loose they cut all -the strings that bound me; whereupon I rose up, with as melancholy a -disposition as ever I had in my life. But the noise and astonishment of -the people at seeing me rise and walk are not to be expressed. The chains -that held my left leg were about two yards long, and gave me not only -the liberty of walking backwards and forwards in a semicircle, but being -fixed within four inches of the gate, allowed me to creep in and lie at -my full length in the temple. - -[Illustration] - - - - -CHAPTER II - - THE EMPEROR OF LILLIPUT, ATTENDED BY SEVERAL OF THE NOBILITY, - COMES TO SEE THE AUTHOR IN HIS CONFINEMENT—THE EMPEROR’S PERSON - AND HABITS DESCRIBED—LEARNED MEN APPOINTED TO TEACH THE AUTHOR - THEIR LANGUAGE—HE GAINS FAVOR BY HIS MILD DISPOSITION—HIS - POCKETS ARE SEARCHED, AND HIS SWORD AND PISTOLS TAKEN FROM HIM. - - -When I found myself on my feet I looked about me, and must confess I -never beheld a more entertaining prospect. The country around appeared -like a continued garden, and the inclosed fields, which were generally -forty feet square, resembled so many beds of flowers. These fields were -intermingled with woods of half a stang, and the tallest trees, as I -could judge, appeared to be seven feet high. I viewed the town on my left -hand, which looked like the painted scene of a city in a theater. - -The emperor was already descended from the tower and advancing on -horseback towards me, which had like to have cost him dear; for the -beast, though very well trained, yet wholly unused to such a sight, which -appeared as if a mountain moved before him, reared up on his hindfeet; -but that prince, who is an excellent horseman, kept his seat, till his -attendants ran in and held the bridle, while his majesty had time to -dismount. When he alighted he surveyed me round with great admiration; -but kept without the length of my chain. He ordered his cooks and -butlers, who were already prepared, to give me victuals and drink, which -they pushed forward in a sort of vehicles upon wheels till I could reach -them, I took these vehicles and soon emptied them all; twenty of them -were filled with meat, and ten with liquor; each of the former afforded -me two or three good mouthfuls; and I emptied the liquor of ten vessels, -which was contained in earthen vials, into one vehicle, drinking it off -at a draught; and so I did with the rest. The empress and young princes -of the blood of both sexes, attended by many ladies, sat at some distance -in their chairs; but, upon the accident that happened to the emperor’s -horse, they alighted, and came near his person, which I am now going to -describe. He is taller by almost the breadth of my nail, than any of -his court, which alone is enough to strike an awe into the beholders. -His features are strong and masculine, with an Austrian lip and arched -nose, his complexion olive, his countenance erect, his body and limbs -well proportioned, all his motions graceful and his deportment majestic. -He was then past his prime, being twenty-eight years and three-quarters -old, of which he had reigned about seven in great felicity and generally -victorious. For the better convenience of beholding him I lay on my side, -so that my face was parallel to his, and he stood but three yards off; -however, I have had him since many times in my hand, and therefore cannot -be deceived in the description. His dress was very plain and simple, -and the fashion of it between the Asiatic and the European; but he had -on his head a light helmet of gold, adorned with jewels, and a plume -on the crest. He held his sword drawn in his hand to defend himself, -if I should happen to break loose: it was almost three inches long; -the hilt and scabbard were gold enriched with diamonds. His voice was -shrill, but very clear and articulate, and I could distinctly hear it -when I stood up. The ladies and courtiers were all most magnificently -clad, so that the spot they stood upon seemed to resemble a petticoat -spread on the ground, embroidered with figures of gold and silver. His -imperial majesty spoke often to me, and I returned answers, but neither -of us could understand a syllable. There were several of his priests and -lawyers present (as I conjectured by their habits), who were commanded -to address themselves to me, and I spoke to them in as many languages -as I had the least smattering of, which were High and Low Dutch, Latin, -French, Spanish, Italian, and Lingua Franca; but all to no purpose. After -about two hours the court retired, and I was left with a strong guard to -prevent the impertinence, and probably the malice of the rabble, who were -very impatient to crowd about me as near as they durst; and some of them -had the impudence to shoot their arrows at me as I sat on the ground by -the door of my house, whereof one very narrowly missed my left eye. But -the colonel ordered six of the ringleaders to be seized, and thought no -punishment so proper as to deliver them bound into my hands; which some -of his soldiers accordingly did, pushing them forwards with the butt-ends -of their pikes into my reach. I took them all in my right hand, put five -of them into my coat pocket, and as to the sixth, I made a countenance as -if I would eat him alive. The poor man squalled terribly, and the colonel -and his officers were in much pain, especially when they saw me take -out my penknife; but I soon put them out of fear; for, looking mildly, -and immediately cutting the strings he was bound with, I set him gently -on the ground and away he ran. I treated the rest in the same manner, -taking them one by one out of my pocket; and I observed both the soldiers -and people were highly obliged at this mark of my clemency, which was -represented very much to my advantage at court. - -Towards night I got with some difficulty into my house, where I lay on -the ground, and continued so to do about a fortnight; during which time -the emperor gave orders to have a bed prepared for me. Six hundred beds -of the common measure were brought in carriages, and worked up in my -house; a hundred and fifty of their beds, sewn together, made up the -breadth and length; and these were four double, which however kept me but -very indifferently from the hardness of the floor, that was of smooth -stone. By the same computation they provided me with sheets, blankets, -and coverlets, tolerable enough for one who had been so long inured to -hardships as I. - -As the news of my arrival spread through the kingdom it brought -prodigious numbers of rich, idle, and curious people to see me; so -that the villages were almost emptied, and great neglect of tillage -and household affairs must have ensued if his imperial majesty had -not provided by several proclamations and orders of state against -this inconveniency. He directed that those who had already beheld me -should return home and not presume to come within fifty yards of my -house without license from court; whereby the secretaries of state got -considerable fees. - -In the meantime the emperor held frequent councils to debate what course -should be taken with me; and I was afterwards assured by a particular -friend, a person of great quality, who was looked upon to be as much -in the secret as any, that the court was under many difficulties -concerning me. They apprehended my breaking loose, that my diet would be -very expensive and might cause a famine. Sometimes they determined to -starve me, or at least to shoot me in the face and hands with poisoned -arrows which would soon dispatch me; but again they considered that the -stench of so large a carcass might produce a plague in the metropolis -and probably spread through the whole kingdom. In the midst of these -consultations several officers of the army went to the door of the great -council chamber and two of them being admitted, gave an account of my -behavior to the six criminals above mentioned; which made so favorable -an impression in the breast of his majesty and the whole board in my -behalf that an imperial commission was issued out, obliging all the -villages nine hundred yards round the city, to deliver in every morning -six beeves, forty sheep, and other victuals for my sustenance; together -with a proportionable quantity of bread, and wine and other liquors; -for the due payment of which his majesty gave assignments upon his -treasury. For this prince lives chiefly upon his own demesnes, seldom -except upon great occasions raising any subsidies upon his subjects, -who are bound to attend him in his wars at their own expense. An -establishment was also made of six hundred persons to be my domestics, -who had board-wages allowed for their maintenance and tents built for -them very conveniently on each side of my door. It was likewise ordered -that three hundred tailors should make me a suit of clothes after the -fashion of the country; that six of his majesty’s greatest scholars -should be employed to instruct me in their language; and, lastly, that -the emperor’s horses, and those of the nobility and troops of guards, -should be frequently exercised in my sight, to accustom themselves to me. -All these orders were duly put in execution, and in about three weeks I -made a great progress in learning their language; during which time the -emperor frequently honored me with his visits, and was pleased to assist -my masters in teaching me. We began already to converse together in some -sort; and the first words I learned were to express my desire that he -would please to give me my liberty; which I every day repeated on my -knees. His answer, as I could apprehend it, was that this must be a work -of time, not to be thought on without the advice of his council, and -that first I must _lumos kelmin pesso desmar lon emposo_; that is, swear -a peace with him and his kingdom: however, that I should be used with -all kindness, and he advised me to acquire, by my patience and discreet -behavior the good opinion of himself and his subjects. He desired I would -not take it ill if he gave orders to certain proper officers to search -me; for probably I might carry about me several weapons, which must -needs be dangerous things, if they answered the bulk of so prodigious -a person. I said his majesty should be satisfied, for I was ready to -strip myself and turn up my pockets before him. This I delivered part in -words and part in signs. He replied that, by the laws of the kingdom I -must be searched by two of his officers; that he knew this could not be -done without my consent and assistance; that he had so good an opinion -of my generosity and justice as to trust their persons in my hands; that -whatever they took from me should be returned when I left the country -or paid for at the rate which I would set upon them. I took up the two -officers in my hands, put them first into my coat pockets and then into -every other pocket about me, except my two fobs, and another secret -pocket which I had no mind should be searched, wherein I had some little -necessaries that were of no consequence to any but myself. In one of -my fobs there was a silver watch and in the other a small quantity of -gold in a purse. These gentlemen, having pen, ink, and paper about them, -made an exact inventory of everything they saw; and when they had done, -desired I would set them down, that they might deliver it to the emperor. -This inventory I afterwards translated into English, and is word for word -as follows: - - “IMPRIMIS, In the right coat pocket of the great Man-mountain - (for so I interpret the words _quinbus flestrin_), after the - strictest search, we found only one great piece of coarse - cloth, large enough to be a foot-cloth for your majesty’s - chief room of state. In the left pocket we saw a huge silver - chest, with a cover of the same metal, which we the searchers - were not able to lift. We desired it should be opened, and one - of us stepping into it, found himself up to the mid-leg in a - sort of dust, some part whereof flying up to our faces, set us - both a-sneezing several times together. In his right waistcoat - pocket we found a prodigious bundle of white thin substances, - folded one over another, about the bigness of three men, tied - with a strong cable and marked with black figures; which we - humbly conceive to be writings, every letter almost half as - large as the palm of our hands. In the left there was a sort - of engine, from the back of which were extended twenty long - poles, resembling the palisadoes before your majesty’s court; - wherewith we conjecture the Man-mountain combs his head, for - we did not always trouble him with questions, because we found - it a great difficulty to make him understand us. In the large - pocket on the right side of his middle cover (so I translate - _ranfu-lo_, by which they meant my breeches), we saw a hollow - pillar of iron, about the length of a man, fastened to a strong - piece of timber larger than the pillar, and upon one side of - the pillar were huge pieces of iron sticking out, cut into - strange figures, which we know not what to make of. In the - left pocket another engine of the same kind. In the smaller - pocket on the right side, were several round flat pieces of - white and red metal, of different bulk; some of the white, - which seemed to be silver, were so large and heavy that my - comrade and I could hardly lift them. In the left pocket were - two black pillars irregularly shaped; we could not, without - difficulty, reach the top of them, as we stood at the bottom of - his pocket. One of them was covered and seemed all of a piece; - but at the upper end of the other there appeared a white round - substance, about twice the bigness of our heads. Within each - of these was inclosed a prodigious plate of steel; which, by - our orders, we obliged him to show us, because we apprehended - they might be dangerous engines. He took them out of their - cases, and told us that in his own country his practice was to - shave his beard with one of these and to cut his meat with the - other. There were two pockets which we could not enter; these - he called his fobs; they were two large slits cut into the top - of his middle cover, but squeezed close by the pressure of his - belly. Out of the right fob hung a great silver chain, with - a wonderful kind of engine at the bottom. We directed him to - draw out whatever was fastened to that chain, which appeared to - be a globe, half silver, and half of some transparent metal; - for on the transparent side we saw certain strange figures - circularly drawn, and thought we could touch them till we - found our fingers stopped by that lucid substance. He put his - engine to our ears, which made an incessant noise, like that - of a watermill; and we conjecture it is either some unknown - animal or the god that he worships; but we are more inclined - to the latter opinion, because he assures us (if we understood - him right, for he expressed himself very imperfectly) that he - seldom did anything without consulting it. He called it his - oracle, and said it pointed out the time for every action of - his life. From the left fob he took out a net almost large - enough for a fisherman, but contrived to open and shut like a - purse, and which served him for the same use; we found therein - several massy pieces of yellow metal, which, if they be real - gold, must be of immense value. - - “Having thus, in obedience to your majesty’s commands, - diligently searched all his pockets, we observed a girdle about - his waist, made of the hide of some prodigious animal, from - which, on the left side, hung a sword of the length of five - men; and on the right a bag or pouch divided into two cells, - each cell capable of holding three of your majesty’s subjects. - In one of these cells were several globes or balls of a most - ponderous metal, about the bigness of our heads, and required - a strong hand to lift them; the other cell contained a heap of - certain black grains, but of no great bulk or weight, for we - could hold above fifty of them in the palms of our hands. - - “This is an exact inventory of what we found about the body - of the Man-mountain, who used us with great civility, and - due respect to your majesty’s commission. Signed and sealed - on the fourth day of the eighty-ninth moon of your majesty’s - auspicious reign.” - - CLEFREN FRELOCK, MARSI FRELOCK. - - -When this inventory was read over to the emperor he directed me, although -in very gentle terms, to deliver up the several particulars. He first -called for my scimitar, which I took out, scabbard and all. In the -meantime he ordered three thousand of his choicest troops (who then -attended him) to surround me at a distance, with their bows and arrows -just ready to discharge; but I did not observe it, for my eyes were -wholly fixed upon his majesty. He then desired me to draw my scimitar, -which, although it had got some rust by the sea water, was in most parts -exceeding bright. I did so, and immediately all the troops gave a shout -between terror and surprise; for the sun shone clear, and the reflection -dazzled their eyes as I waved the scimitar to and fro in my hand. His -majesty, who is a most magnanimous prince, was less daunted than I could -expect; he ordered me to return it into the scabbard and cast it on the -ground as gently as I could, about six feet from the end of my chain. The -next thing he demanded was one of the hollow iron pillars, by which he -meant my pocket pistols. I drew it out, and at his desire, as well as I -could, expressed to him the use of it; and charging it only with powder, -which by the closeness of my pouch happened to escape wetting in the sea -(an inconvenience against which all prudent mariners take special care -to provide), I first cautioned the emperor not to be afraid, and then -I let it off in the air. The astonishment here was much greater than -at the sight of the scimitar. Hundreds fell down as if they had been -struck dead; and even the emperor, although he stood his ground, could -not recover himself in some time. I delivered up both my pistols in the -same manner as I had done my scimitar, and then my pouch of powder and -bullets; begging him that the former might be kept from the fire, for it -would kindle with the smallest spark and blow up his imperial palace into -the air. I likewise delivered up my watch, which the emperor was very -curious to see, and commanded two of his tallest yeomen of the guards to -bear it on a pole upon their shoulders, as draymen in England do a barrel -of ale. He was amazed at the continual noise it made, and the motion of -the minute hand, which he could easily discern; for their sight is much -more acute than ours; and asked the opinions of his learned men about -him, which were various and remote, as the reader may imagine without -my repeating; although, indeed, I could not very perfectly understand -them. I then gave up my silver and copper money, my purse with nine large -pieces of gold, and some smaller ones; my knife and razor, my comb and -silver snuff box, my handkerchief and journal book. My scimitar, pistols, -and pouch were conveyed in carriages to his majesty’s stores, but the -rest of my goods were returned me. - -[Illustration: “_I likewise delivered up my watch, which the emperor was -very curious to see_” - -_Page 28_] - -I had, as I before observed, one private pocket which escaped their -search, wherein there was a pair of spectacles (which I sometimes use for -the weakness of my eyes) a pocket perspective, and some other little -conveniences which, being of no consequence to the emperor, I did not -think myself bound in honor to discover, and I apprehended they might be -lost or spoiled if I ventured them out of my possession. - - - - -CHAPTER III - - THE AUTHOR DIVERTS THE EMPEROR, AND HIS NOBILITY OF BOTH SEXES, - IN A VERY UNCOMMON MANNER—THE DIVERSIONS OF THE COURT OF - LILLIPUT DESCRIBED—THE AUTHOR HAS HIS LIBERTY GRANTED HIM, UPON - CERTAIN CONDITIONS. - - -My gentleness and good behavior had gained so far on the emperor and his -court, and indeed upon the army and people in general, that I began to -conceive hopes of getting my liberty in a short time. I took all possible -methods to cultivate this favorable disposition. The natives came by -degrees to be less apprehensive of any danger from me. I would sometimes -lie down and let five or six of them dance on my hand; and at last the -boys and girls would venture to come and play at hide-and-seek in my -hair. I had now made a good progress in understanding and speaking their -language. The emperor had a mind one day to entertain me with several of -the country shows, wherein they exceed all nations I have known, both for -dexterity and magnificence. I was diverted with none so much as that of -the rope dancers, performed upon a slender white thread, extended about -two feet and twelve inches from the ground. Upon which I shall desire -liberty, with the reader’s patience, to enlarge a little. - -This diversion is only practiced by those persons who are candidates -for great employments and high favor at court. They are trained in this -art from their youth, and are not always of noble birth, or liberal -education. When a great office is vacant, either by death or disgrace -(which often happens), five or six of those candidates petition the -emperor to entertain his majesty and the court with a dance on the rope; -and whoever jumps the highest without falling succeeds in the office. -Very often the chief ministers themselves are commanded to show their -skill, and to convince the emperor that they have not lost their faculty. -Flimnap, the treasurer, is allowed to cut a caper on the straight rope, -at least an inch higher than any other lord in the whole empire. I have -seen him do the somersault several times together upon a trencher fixed -on the rope, which is no thicker than a common packthread in England. -My friend Reldresal, principal secretary for private affairs, is, in my -opinion, if I am not partial, the second after the treasurer; the rest of -the great officers are much upon a par. - -These diversions are often attended with fatal accidents, whereof great -numbers are on record. I myself have seen two or three candidates break -a limb. But the danger is much greater when the ministers themselves are -commanded to show their dexterity; for, by contending to excel themselves -and their fellows, they strain so far that there is hardly one of them -who has not received a fall, and some of them two or three. I was assured -that, a year or two before my arrival, Flimnap would infallibly have -broke his neck, if one of the king’s cushions, that accidentally lay on -the ground, had not weakened the force of his fall. - -There is likewise another diversion which is only shown before the -emperor and empress, and first minister, upon particular occasions. The -emperor lays on the table three fine silken threads of six inches long; -one is purple, the other yellow, and the third white. These threads -are proposed as prizes for those persons whom the emperor has a mind to -distinguish by a peculiar mark of his favor. The ceremony is performed in -his majesty’s great chamber of state, where the candidates are to undergo -a trial of dexterity very different from the former, and such as I have -not observed the least resemblance of in any other country of the old or -the new world. The emperor holds a stick in his hands, both ends parallel -to the horizon, while the candidates advancing, one by one, sometimes -leap over the stick, sometimes creep under it, backwards and forwards, -several times, according as the stick is advanced or depressed. Sometimes -the emperor holds one end of the stick, and his first minister the other; -sometimes the minister has it entirely to himself. Whoever performs his -part with most agility and holds out the longest in leaping and creeping, -is rewarded with the purple-colored silk; the yellow is given to the -next, and the white to the third, which they all wear girt twice round -about the middle; and you see few great persons about this court who are -not adorned with one of these girdles. - -The horses of the army, and those of the royal stables, having been daily -led before me, were no longer shy, but would come up to my very feet -without starting. The riders would leap them over my hand, as I held it -on the ground; and one of the emperor’s huntsmen, upon a large courser, -took my foot, shoe and all, which was indeed a prodigious leap. I had the -good fortune to divert the emperor one day after a very extraordinary -manner. I desired he would order several sticks of two feet high, and the -thickness of an ordinary cane, to be brought me; whereupon his majesty -commanded the master of his woods to give directions accordingly, and the -next morning six woodmen arrived with as many carriages, drawn by eight -horses to each. I took nine of these sticks and fixing them firmly in the -ground in a quadrangular figure, two feet and a half square, I took four -other sticks and tied them parallel at each corner, about two feet from -the ground; then I fastened my handkerchief to the nine sticks that stood -erect, and extended it on all sides, till it was tight as the top of a -drum; and the four parallel sticks, rising about five inches higher than -the handkerchief, served as ledges on each side. When I had finished my -work I desired the emperor to let a troop of his best horse, twenty-four -in number, come and exercise upon this plane. His majesty approved of -the proposal, and I took them up one by one in my hands, ready mounted -and armed, with the proper officers to exercise them. As soon as they -got into order they divided into two parties, performed mock skirmishes, -discharged blunt arrows, drew their swords, fled and pursued, attacked -and retired, and in short, discovered the best military discipline I ever -beheld. The parallel sticks secured them and their horses from falling -over the stage; and the emperor was so much delighted that he ordered -this entertainment to be repeated several days, and once was pleased to -be lifted up and give the word of command; and, with great difficulty, -persuaded even the empress herself to let me hold her in her close -chair within two yards of the stage, from whence she was able to take a -full view of the whole performance. It was my good fortune that no ill -accident happened in these entertainments; only once a fiery horse that -belonged to one of the captains, pawing with his hoof, struck a hole -in my handkerchief, and, his foot slipping, he overthrew his rider and -himself; but I immediately relieved them both, and, covering the hole -with one hand, I set down the troop with the other, in the same manner as -I took them up. The horse that fell was strained in the left shoulder, -but the rider got no hurt, and I repaired my handkerchief as well as I -could; however, I would not trust to the strength of it any more in such -dangerous enterprises. - -About two or three days before I was set at liberty, as I was -entertaining the court with this kind of feats, there arrived an express -to inform his majesty that some of his subjects, riding near the place -where I was first taken up, had seen a great black substance lying on -the ground, very oddly shaped, extending its edges round as wide as his -majesty’s bedchamber, and rising up in the middle as high as a man; that -it was no living creature, as they at first apprehended, for it lay on -the grass without motion, and some of them had walked round it several -times; that, by mounting upon each other’s shoulders, they had got to -the top, which was flat and even, and stamping upon it, they found that -it was hollow within; that they humbly conceived it might be something -belonging to the Man-mountain; and if his majesty pleased they would -undertake to bring it with only five horses. I presently knew what they -meant, and was glad at heart to receive this intelligence. It seems, -upon my first reaching the shore after our shipwreck, I was in such -confusion that before I came to the place where I went to sleep, my -hat, which I had fastened with a string to my head while I was rowing, -and had stuck on all the time I was swimming, fell off after I came -to land; the string, as I conjecture, breaking by some accident which -I never observed, but thought my hat had been lost at sea. I entreated -his imperial majesty to give orders it might be brought to me as soon as -possible, describing to him the use and the nature of it; and the next -day the wagoners arrived with it, but not in a very good condition; they -had bored two holes in the brim, within an inch and a half of the edge, -and fastened two hooks in the holes; these hooks were tied by a long -cord to the harness, and thus my hat was dragged along for above half an -English mile, but the ground in that country being extremely smooth and -level, it received less damage than I expected. - -Two days after this adventure, the emperor, having ordered that part of -his army which quarters in and about his metropolis to be in readiness, -took a fancy of diverting himself in a very singular manner. He desired -that I would stand like a colossus, with my legs as far asunder as -I conveniently could. He then commanded his general (who was an old -experienced leader, and a great patron of mine) to draw up the troops in -close order, and march them under me; the foot by twenty-four abreast, -and the horse by sixteen, with drums beating, colors flying, and pikes -advanced. This body consisted of three thousand foot, and a thousand -horse. - -I had sent so many memorials and petitions for my liberty that his -majesty at length mentioned the matter, first in the cabinet and then in -a full council, where it was opposed by none except Skyresh Bolgolam, -who was pleased, without any provocation, to be my mortal enemy. But it -was carried against him by the whole board and confirmed by the emperor. -That minister was _galbet_, or admiral of the realm, very much in his -master’s confidence, and a person well versed in affairs, but of a morose -and sour complexion. However, he was at length persuaded to comply, but -prevailed that the articles and conditions upon which I should be set -free, and to which I must swear, should be drawn up by himself. These -articles were brought to me by Skyresh Bolgolam in person, attended by -two under-secretaries and several persons of distinction. After they -were read, I was demanded to swear to the performance of them, first in -the manner of my own country, and afterwards in the methods prescribed -by their laws, which was to hold my right foot in my left hand, and to -place the middle finger of my right hand on the crown of my head, and my -thumb on the tip of my right ear. But because the reader may perhaps be -curious to have some idea of the style and manner of expression peculiar -to that people, as well as to know the articles upon which I recovered -my liberty, I have made a translation of the whole instrument, word for -word, as near as I was able, which I here offer to the public: - - GOLBASTO MOMAREN EVLAME GURDILO SHEFIN MULLY ULLY GUE, most - mighty Emperor of Lilliput, delight and terror of the universe, - whose dominions extend five thousand _blustrogs_ (about twelve - miles in circumference) to the extremities of the globe; - monarch of all monarchs, taller than the sons of men; whose - feet press down to the center, and whose head strikes against - the sun; at whose nod the princes of the earth shake their - knees; pleasant as the spring, comfortable as the summer, - fruitful as autumn, dreadful as winter. His most sublime - majesty proposes to the Man-mountain, lately arrived at our - celestial dominions, the following articles, which, by a solemn - oath, he shall be obliged to perform: - - I. The Man-mountain shall not depart from our dominions without - our license under our great seal. - - II. He shall not presume to come into our metropolis without - our express order; at which time, the inhabitants shall have - two hours’ warning to keep within their doors. - - III. The said Man-mountain shall confine his walks to our - principal highroads, and not offer to walk or lie down in a - meadow or field of corn. - - IV. As he walks the said roads, he shall take the utmost care - not to trample upon the bodies of any of our loving subjects, - their horses or carriages, nor take any of our said subjects - into his hands without their own consent. - - V. If an express requires extraordinary dispatch, the - Man-mountain shall be obliged to carry, in his pocket, the - messenger and horse a six days’ journey once in every moon, and - return the said messenger back (if so required) safe to our - imperial presence. - - VI. He shall be our ally against our enemies in the island of - Blefuscu, and do his utmost to destroy their fleet, which is - now preparing to invade us. - - VII. That the said Man-mountain shall, at his times of - leisure, be aiding and assisting to our workmen, in helping to - raise certain great stones, towards covering the wall of the - principal park, and other of our royal buildings. - - VIII. That the said Man-mountain shall, in two moons’ time, - deliver in an exact survey of the circumference of our - dominions, by a computation of his own paces round the coast. - - Lastly, That upon his solemn oath to observe the above - articles, the said Man-mountain shall have a daily allowance - of meat and drink sufficient for the support of 1728 of our - subjects, with free access to our royal person, and other marks - of our favor. Given at our palace at Belfaborac, the twelfth - day of the ninety-first moon of our reign. - -I swore and subscribed to these articles with great cheerfulness and -content, although some of them were not so honorable as I could have -wished; which proceeded wholly from the malice of Skyresh Bolgolam, the -high-admiral; whereupon my chains were immediately unlocked, and I was at -full liberty. The emperor himself, in person, did me the honor to be by -at the whole ceremony. I made my acknowledgments by prostrating myself at -his majesty’s feet; but he commanded me to rise; and after many gracious -expressions, which to avoid the censure of vanity I shall not repeat, he -added that he hoped I should prove a useful servant, and well deserve all -the favors he had already conferred upon me, or might do for the future. - -The reader may please to observe, that in the last article for the -recovery of my liberty the emperor stipulates to allow me a quantity -of meat and drink sufficient for the support of 1728 Lilliputians. -Some time after, asking a friend at court how they came to fix on that -determinate number, he told me that his majesty’s mathematicians, having -taken the height of my body by the help of a quadrant, and finding it -to exceed theirs in the proportion of twelve to one, they concluded from -the similarity of their bodies, that mine must contain at least 1728 of -theirs, and consequently would require as much food as was necessary to -support that number of Lilliputians. By which the reader may conceive an -idea of the ingenuity of that people, as well as the prudent and exact -economy of so great a prince. - - - - -CHAPTER IV - - MILDENDO, THE METROPOLIS OF LILLIPUT, DESCRIBED, TOGETHER WITH - THE EMPEROR’S PALACE—A CONVERSATION BETWEEN THE AUTHOR AND A - PRINCIPAL SECRETARY, CONCERNING THE AFFAIRS OF THAT EMPIRE—THE - AUTHOR’S OFFERS TO SERVE THE EMPEROR IN HIS WARS. - - -The first request I made after I had obtained my liberty, was that I -might have license to see Mildendo, the metropolis; which the emperor -easily granted me, but with a special charge to do no hurt either to the -inhabitants or their houses. The people had notice, by proclamation, -of my design to visit the town. The wall which encompassed it, is two -feet and a half high, and at least eleven inches broad, so that a coach -and horses may be driven very safely round it; and it is flanked with -strong towers at ten feet distance. I stepped over the great western -gate, and passed very gently and sideling through the two principal -streets, only in my short waistcoat, for fear of damaging the roofs and -eaves of the houses with the skirts of my coat. I walked with the utmost -circumspection, to avoid treading on any stragglers that might remain in -the streets; although the orders were very strict that all people should -keep in their houses, at their own peril. The garret windows and tops of -houses were so crowded with spectators that I thought in all my travels -I had not seen a more populous place. The city is an exact square, each -side of the wall being five hundred feet long. The two great streets -which run across and divide it into four quarters, are five feet wide. -The lanes and alleys, which I could not enter, but only viewed them as -I passed, are from twelve to eighteen inches. The town is capable of -holding five hundred thousand souls. The houses are from three to five -stories; the shops and markets well provided. - -The emperor’s palace is in the center of the city, where the two great -streets meet. It is inclosed by a wall of two feet high, and twenty feet -distant from the buildings. I had his majesty’s permission to step over -this wall; and the space being so wide between that and the palace, I -could easily view it on every side. The outward court is a square of -forty feet, and includes two other courts; in the inmost are the royal -apartments, which I was very desirous to see, but found it extremely -difficult; for the great gates, from one square into another, were but -eighteen inches high and seven inches wide. Now the buildings of the -outer court were at least five feet high, and it was impossible for me to -stride over them without infinite damage to the pile, though the walls -were strongly built of hewn stone, and four inches thick. At the same -time the emperor had a great desire that I should see the magnificence of -his palace; but this I was not able to do till three days after, which -I spent in cutting down with my knife some of the largest trees in the -royal park, about a hundred yards’ distance from the city. Of these trees -I made two stools, each about three feet high, and strong enough to bear -my weight. The people having received notice a second time, I went again -through the city to the palace with my two stools in my hands. When I -came to the side of the outer court, I stood upon one stool and took the -other in my hand; this I lifted over the roof, and gently set it down on -the space between the first and second court, which was eight feet wide. -I then stepped over the buildings very conveniently from one stool to the -other, and drew up the first one after me with a hooked stick. By this -contrivance I got into the inmost court; and, lying down upon my side, -I applied my face to the windows of the middle stories, which were left -open on purpose, and discovered the most splendid apartments that can be -imagined. - -There I saw the empress and the young princes, in their several lodgings, -with their chief attendants about them. Her imperial majesty was pleased -to smile very graciously upon me, and gave me out of the window her hand -to kiss. - -But I shall not anticipate the reader with further descriptions of -this kind, because I reserve them for a greater work, which is now -almost ready for the press; containing a general description of this -empire, from its first erection, through a long series of princes; with -a particular account of their wars and politics, laws, learning and -religion, their plants and animals, their peculiar manners and customs, -with other matters very curious and useful; my chief design at present -being only to relate such events and transactions as happened to the -public or to myself during a residence of about nine months in that -empire. - -One morning, about a fortnight after I had obtained my liberty, -Reldresal, principal secretary (as they style him) for private affairs, -came to my house attended only by one servant. He ordered his coach to -wait at a distance, and desired I would give him an hour’s audience; -which I readily consented to, on account of his quality and personal -merits, as well as the many good offices he had done me during my -solicitations at court. I offered to lie down, that he might the more -conveniently reach my ear; but he chose rather to let me hold him in my -hand during our conversation. He began with compliments on my liberty; -said he might pretend to some merit in it; but, however, added, that if -it had not been for the present situation of things at court, perhaps I -might not have obtained it so soon. “For,” said he, “as flourishing a -condition as we may appear to be in to foreigners, we labor under two -mighty evils: a violent faction at home, and the danger of an invasion by -a most potent enemy from abroad. As to the first, you are to understand -that for above seventy moons past there have been two struggling parties -in this empire, under the names of _Tramecksan_ and _Slamecksan_, -from the high and low heels of their shoes, by which they distinguish -themselves. It is alleged, indeed, that the high heels are most agreeable -to our ancient constitution; but, however this may be, his majesty has -determined to make use of only low heels in the administration of the -government, and all offices in the gift of the crown, as you cannot -but observe; and particularly, that his majesty’s imperial heels are -lower at least by a _drurr_ than any of his court (_drurr_ is a measure -about the fourteenth part of an inch). The animosities between these -two parties run so high, that they will neither eat nor drink nor -talk with each other. We compute the _Tramecksan_, or High-heels, to -exceed us in number; but the power is wholly on our side. We apprehend -his imperial highness, the heir to the crown, to have some tendency -towards the High-heels; at least, we can plainly discover one of his -heels higher than the other, which gives him a hobble in his gait. Now, -in the midst of these intestine disquiets, we are threatened with an -invasion from the island of Blefuscu, which is the other great empire of -the universe, almost as large and powerful as this of his majesty. For -as to what we have heard you affirm, that there are other kingdoms and -states in the world, inhabited by human creatures as large as yourself, -our philosophers are in much doubt, and would rather conjecture that -you dropped from the moon, or one of the stars; because it is certain -that a hundred mortals of your bulk would in a short time destroy all -the fruits and cattle of his majesty’s dominions; besides, our histories -of six thousand moons make no mention of any other regions than the -two great empires of Lilliput and Blefuscu. Which two mighty powers -have, as I was going to tell you, been engaged in a most obstinate war -for six-and-thirty moons past. It began upon the following occasion: -It is allowed on all hands, that the primitive way of breaking eggs, -before we eat them, was upon the larger end; but his present majesty’s -grandfather, while he was a boy, going to eat an egg, and breaking it -according to the ancient practice, happened to cut one of his fingers; -whereupon the emperor, his father, published an edict, commanding all -his subjects, upon great penalties, to break the smaller end of their -eggs. The people so highly resented this law, that our histories tell -us there have been six rebellions raised on that account; wherein one -emperor lost his life, and another his crown. These civil commotions -were constantly fomented by the monarchs of Blefuscu; and when they -were quelled, the exiles always fled for refuge to that empire. It is -computed that eleven thousand persons have, at several times, suffered -death, rather than submit to break their eggs at the smaller end. Many -hundred large volumes have been published upon this controversy; but the -books of the Big-endians have been long forbidden, and the whole party -rendered incapable by law of holding employments. During the course of -these troubles, the emperors of Blefuscu did frequently expostulate -by their ambassadors, accusing us of making a schism in religion by -offending against a fundamental doctrine of our great prophet Lustrog, in -the fifty-fourth chapter of the Blundecral, which is their Alcoran. This, -however, is thought to be a mere strain upon the text; for the words are -these: That all true believers shall break their eggs at the convenient -end; and which is the convenient end seems, in my humble opinion, to be -left to every man’s conscience, or at least in the power of the chief -magistrate to determine. Now, the Big-endian exiles have found so much -credit in the emperor of Blefuscu’s court, and so much private assistance -and encouragement from their party here at home, that a bloody war has -been carried on between the two empires for six-and-thirty moons, with -various success; during which time we have lost forty capital ships, and -a much greater number of smaller vessels, together with thirty thousand -of our best seamen and soldiers; and the damage received by the enemy -is reckoned to be somewhat greater than ours. However, they have now -equipped a numerous fleet, and are just preparing to make a descent upon -us; and his imperial majesty, placing great confidence in your valor and -strength, has commanded me to lay this account of his affairs before you.” - -I desired the secretary to present my humble duty to the emperor; and to -let him know that I thought it would not become me, who was a foreigner, -to interfere with parties; but I was ready, with the hazard of my life, -to defend his person and state against all invaders. - - - - -CHAPTER V - - THE AUTHOR, BY AN EXTRAORDINARY STRATAGEM, PREVENTS - AN INVASION—A HIGH TITLE OF HONOR IS CONFERRED UPON - HIM—AMBASSADORS ARRIVE FROM THE EMPEROR OF BLEFUSCU, AND SUE - FOR PEACE. - - -The empire of Blefuscu is an island situated to the northeast of -Lilliput, from which it is parted only by a channel eight hundred -yards wide. I had not yet seen it, and upon this notice of an intended -invasion, I avoided appearing on that side of the coast, for fear of -being discovered by some of the enemy’s ships, who had received no -intelligence of me; all intercourse between the two empires having been -strictly forbidden during the war, upon pain of death, and an embargo -laid by our emperor upon all vessels whatsoever. I communicated to his -majesty a project I had formed of seizing the enemy’s whole fleet; which, -as our scouts assured us, lay at anchor in the harbor, ready to sail with -the first fair wind. I consulted the most experienced seamen upon the -depth of the channel, which they had often plumbed; who told me, that in -the middle, at high water, it was seventy _glumgluffs_ deep, which is -about six feet of European measure; and the rest of it fifty _glumgluffs_ -at most. I walked towards the northeast coast, over against Blefuscu, -and lying down behind a hillock, I took out my small pocket perspective -glass, and viewed the enemy’s fleet at anchor, consisting of about fifty -men of war, and a great number of transports; I then came back to my -house, and gave orders (for which I had a warrant) for a great quantity -of the strongest cable and bars of iron. The cable was about as thick as -packthread, and the bars of the length and size of a knitting needle. I -trebled the cable to make it stronger, and for the same reason I twisted -three of the iron bars together, bending the extremities into a hook. -Having thus fixed fifty hooks to as many cables, I went back to the -northeast coast, and putting off my coat, shoes, and stockings, walked -into the sea in my leathern jerkin, about half an hour before high water. -I waded with what haste I could, and swam in the middle about thirty -yards, till I felt ground. I arrived at the fleet in less than half an -hour. The enemy were so frightened when they saw me, that they leaped out -of their ships, and swam to shore, where there could not be fewer than -thirty thousand souls. I then took my tackling, and fastening a hook to -the hole at the prow of each, I tied all the cords together at the end. -While I was thus employed, the enemy discharged several thousand arrows, -many of which stuck in my hands and face; and besides the excessive -smart, gave me much disturbance in my work. My greatest apprehension was -for my eyes, which I should have infallibly lost, if I had not suddenly -thought of an expedient. I kept, among other little necessaries, a -pair of spectacles in a private pocket, which, as I observed before, -had escaped the emperor’s searchers. These I took out and fastened as -strongly as I could upon my nose, and, thus armed, went on boldly with my -work, in spite of the enemy’s arrows, many of which struck against the -glasses of my spectacles, but without any other effect further than a -little to discompose them. I had now fastened all the hooks, and taking -the knot in my hand, began to pull; but not a ship would stir, for they -were all too fast held by their anchors, so that the boldest part of -my enterprise remained. I therefore let go the cord, and leaving the -hooks fixed to the ships, I resolutely cut with my knife the cables that -fastened the anchors, receiving about two hundred arrows in my face and -hands; then I took up the knotted end of the cables to which my hooks -were tied, and with great ease drew fifty of the enemy’s largest men of -war after me. - -The Blefuscudians, who had not the least imagination of what I intended, -were at first confounded with astonishment. They had seen me cut the -cables, and thought my design was only to let the ships run adrift, or -fall foul on each other; but when they perceived the whole fleet moving -in order, and saw me pulling at the end, they set up such a scream of -grief and despair as is almost impossible to describe or conceive. When I -had got out of danger, I stopped awhile to pick out the arrows that stuck -in my hands and face; and rubbed on some of the same ointment that was -given me at my first arrival, as I have formerly mentioned. I then took -off my spectacles, and waiting about an hour till the tide was a little -fallen, I waded through the middle with my cargo, and arrived safe at the -royal port of Lilliput. - -The emperor and his whole court stood on the shore, expecting the issue -of this great adventure. They saw the ships move forward in a large -half-moon, but could not discern me, who was up to my breast in water. -When I advanced to the middle of the channel, they were yet more in pain, -because I was under water to my neck. The emperor concluded me to be -drowned, and that the enemy’s fleet was approaching in a hostile manner. -But he was soon eased of his fears; for the channel growing shallower -every step I made, I came in a short time within hearing, and holding -up the end of the cable, by which the fleet was fastened, I cried in a -loud voice, “Long live the most puissant emperor of Lilliput!” This great -prince received me at my landing with all possible encomiums, and created -me a _nardac_ upon the spot, which is the highest title of honor among -them. - -His majesty desired I would take some other opportunity of bringing all -the rest of the enemy’s ships into his ports. And so unmeasurable is -the ambition of princes, that he seemed to think of nothing less than -reducing the whole empire of Blefuscu into a province, and governing it -by a viceroy; of destroying the Big-endian exiles, and compelling that -people to break the smaller end of their eggs, by which he would remain -the sole monarch of the whole world. But I endeavored to divert him from -this design, by many arguments drawn from the topics of policy as well as -justice; and I plainly protested that I would never be an instrument of -bringing a free and brave people into slavery. And when the latter was -debated in council, the wisest part of the ministry were of my opinion. - -This open, bold declaration of mine was so opposite to the schemes -and politics of his imperial majesty, that he could never forgive me. -He mentioned it in a very artful manner at council, where I was told -that some of the wisest appeared, at least, by their silence, to be of -my opinion; but others, who were my secret enemies, could not forbear -some expressions which by a side wind reflected on me; and from this -time began an intrigue between his majesty, and a junto of ministers -maliciously bent against me, which broke out in less than two months, -and had like to have ended in my utter destruction. Of so little weight -are the greatest services to princes when put into the balance with a -refusal to gratify their passions. - -[Illustration: “_They perceived the whole fleet moving in order_” - -_Page 49_] - -About three weeks after this exploit there arrived a solemn embassy -from Blefuscu, with humble offers of a peace; which was soon concluded -upon conditions very advantageous to our emperor, wherewith I shall not -trouble the reader. There were six ambassadors with a train of about -five hundred persons; and their entry was very magnificent, suitable -to the grandeur of their master and the importance of their business. -When their treaty was finished, wherein I did them several good offices -by the credit I now had, or at least appeared to have, at court, their -excellencies, who were privately told how much I had been their friend, -made me a visit in form. They began with many compliments upon my valor -and generosity, invited me to that kingdom in the emperor their master’s -name, and desired me to show them some proofs of my prodigious strength, -of which they had heard so many wonders; wherein I readily obliged them, -but shall not trouble the reader with the particulars. - -When I had for some time entertained their excellencies, to their -infinite satisfaction and surprise, I desired they would do me the -honor to present my most humble respects to the emperor their master, -the renown of whose virtues had so justly filled the whole world with -admiration, and whose royal person I resolved to attend before I returned -to my own country. Accordingly, the next time I had the honor to see -our emperor, I desired his general license to wait on the Blefuscudian -monarch, which he was pleased to grant me, as I could perceive, in a very -cold manner; but could not guess the reason, till I had a whisper from a -certain person, that Flimnap and Bolgolam had represented my intercourse -with those ambassadors as a mark of disaffection; from which I am sure my -heart was wholly free. And this was the first time I began to conceive -some imperfect idea of courts and ministers. - -It is to be observed, that these ambassadors spoke to me by an -interpreter, the languages of both empires differing as much from each -other as any two in Europe, and each nation priding itself upon the -antiquity, beauty, and energy of their own tongues, with an avowed -contempt for that of their neighbor; yet our emperor, standing upon -the advantage he had got by the seizure of their fleet, obliged them -to deliver their credentials, and make their speech in the Lilliputian -tongue. And it must be confessed, that from the great intercourse of -trade and commerce between both realms, from the continual reception of -exiles which is mutual among them, and from the custom in each empire to -send their young nobility and richer gentry to the other, in order to -polish themselves by seeing the world, and understanding men and manners, -there are few persons of distinction, or merchants, or seamen, who dwell -in the maritime parts, but what can hold conversation in both tongues; as -I found some weeks after, when I went to pay my respects to the emperor -of Blefuscu, which, in the midst of great misfortunes through the malice -of my enemies, proved a very happy adventure to me, as I shall relate in -its proper place. - -The reader may remember, that when I signed those articles upon which I -recovered my liberty, there were some which I disliked upon account of -their being too servile; neither could anything but an extreme necessity -have forced me to submit. But being now a _nardac_ of the highest rank in -that empire, such offices were looked upon as below my dignity, and the -emperor (to do him justice) never once mentioned them to me. - -[Illustration] - - - - -CHAPTER VI - - OF THE INHABITANTS OF LILLIPUT; THEIR LEARNING, LAWS, AND - CUSTOMS; THE MANNER OF EDUCATING THEIR CHILDREN—THE AUTHOR’S - WAY OF LIVING IN THAT COUNTRY—HIS VINDICATION OF A GREAT LADY. - - -Although I intend to leave the description of this empire to a particular -treatise, yet in the meantime I am content to gratify the curious reader -with some general ideas. As the common size of the natives is somewhat -under six inches high, so there is an exact proportion in all other -animals, as well as plants and trees; for instance, the tallest horses -and oxen are between four and five inches in height, the sheep an inch -and a half, more or less; their geese about the bigness of a sparrow, -and so the several gradations downwards, till you come to the smallest, -which to my sight were almost invisible; but nature has adapted the eyes -of the Lilliputians to all objects proper for their view; they see with -great exactness, but at no great distance. And to show the sharpness of -their sight towards objects that are near, I have been much pleased in -observing a cook pulling a lark, which was not so large as a common fly; -and a young girl threading an invisible needle with invisible silk. Their -tallest trees are about seven feet high: I mean some of those in the -great royal park, the tops whereof I could but just reach with my fist -clenched. The other vegetables are in the same proportion; but this I -leave to the reader’s imagination. - -I shall say but little at present of their learning, which for many -ages has flourished in all its branches among them; but their manner -of writing is very peculiar, being neither from the left to the right, -like the Europeans; nor from the right to the left, like the Arabians; -nor from up to down, like the Chinese; nor from down to up, like the -Cascagians; but aslant, from one corner of the paper to the other, like -ladies in England. - -They bury their dead with their heads directly downward, because they -hold an opinion that in eleven thousand moons they are all to rise -again; in which period the earth (which they conceive to be flat) will -turn upside down, and by this means they shall, at their resurrection, -be found ready standing on their feet. The learned among them confess -the absurdity of this doctrine; but the practice still continues, in -compliance to the vulgar. - -There are some laws and customs in this empire very peculiar; and if -they were not so directly contrary to those of my own dear country, I -should be tempted to say a little in their justification. It is only to -be wished they were as well executed. The first I shall mention relates -to informers. All crimes against the state are punished here with the -utmost severity; but if the person accused makes his innocence plainly to -appear upon his trial, the accuser is immediately put to an ignominious -death; and out of his goods or lands the innocent person is quadruply -recompensed for the loss of his time, for the danger he underwent, for -the hardship of his imprisonment, and for all the charges he has been -at in making his defense; or, if that fund be deficient, it is largely -supplied by the crown. The emperor does also confer on him some public -mark of his favor, and proclamation is made of his innocence through the -whole city. - -They look upon fraud as a greater crime than theft, and therefore -seldom fail to punish it with death; for they allege, that care and -vigilance, with a very common understanding, may preserve a man’s goods -from thieves, but honesty has no fence against superior cunning; and -since it is necessary that there should be a perpetual intercourse of -buying and selling, and dealing upon credit, where fraud is permitted -and connived at, or has no law to punish it, the honest dealer is always -undone, and the knave gets the advantage. I remember, when I was once -interceding with the king for a criminal who had wronged his master of a -great sum of money, which he had received by order, and ran away with; -and happening to tell his majesty by way of extenuation, that it was only -a breach of trust, the emperor thought it monstrous in me to offer as a -defense the greatest aggravation of the crime; and truly I had little to -say in return, farther than the common answer that different nations had -different customs; for I confess I was heartily ashamed. - -Although we call reward and punishment the two hinges upon which all -government turns, yet I could never observe this maxim to be put in -practice by any nation except that of Lilliput. Whoever can there bring -sufficient proof that he has strictly observed the laws of his country -for seventy-three moons, has a claim to certain privileges, according to -his quality and condition of life, with a proportionable sum of money out -of a fund appropriated for that use: he likewise acquires the title of -snilpall, or legal, which is added to his name, but does not descend to -his posterity. And these people thought it a prodigious defect of policy -among us, when I told them our laws were enforced only by penalties, -without any mention of reward. It is upon this account that the image -of Justice, in their courts of judicature, is formed with six eyes, two -before, as many behind, and on each side one, to signify circumspection; -with a bag of gold open in her right hand, and a sword sheathed in her -left, to show that she is more disposed to reward than to punish. - -In choosing persons for all employments, they have more regard to good -morals than to great abilities; for, since government is necessary to -mankind, they believe that the common size of human understandings is -fitted to some station or other; and that Providence never intended to -make the management of public affairs a mystery to be comprehended only -by a few persons of sublime genius, of which there seldom are three born -in an age. But they suppose truth, justice, temperance, and the like, -to be in every man’s power; the practice of which virtues, assisted by -experience and a good intention, would qualify any man for the service of -his country, except where a course of study is required. But they thought -the want of moral virtues was so far from being supplied by superior -endowments of the mind, that employments could never be put into such -dangerous hands as those of persons so qualified; and at least, that the -mistakes committed by ignorance, in a virtuous disposition, would never -be of such fatal consequence to the public weal, as the practices of a -man whose inclinations led him to be corrupt, and who had great abilities -to manage, and multiply, and defend his corruptions. - -In like manner, the disbelief of a Divine Providence renders a man -incapable of holding any public station; for since kings avow themselves -to be the deputies of Providence, the Lilliputians think nothing can be -more absurd than for a prince to employ such men as disown the authority -under which he acts. - -In relating these and the following laws, I would only be understood to -mean the original institutions, and not the most scandalous corruptions, -into which these people are fallen by the degenerate nature of man. For, -as to that infamous practice of acquiring great employments by dancing -on the ropes, or badges of favor and distinction by leaping over sticks -and creeping under them, the reader is to observe that they were first -introduced by the grandfather of the emperor now reigning, and grew to -the present height by the gradual increase of party and faction. - -Ingratitude is among them a capital crime, as we read it to have been -in some other countries; for they reason thus: That whosoever makes ill -returns to his benefactor, must needs be a common enemy to the rest of -mankind, from whom he has received no obligation, and therefore such a -man is not fit to live. - -Their notions relating to the duties of parents and children differ -extremely from ours. For since the conjunction of male and female is -founded upon the great law of nature, in order to propagate and continue -the species, the Lilliputians will needs have it, that men and women are -joined together, like other animals, by the motives of concupiscence; and -that their tenderness toward their young proceeds from the like natural -principle: for which reason, they will never allow that a child is under -any obligation to his father for begetting him, or to his mother for -bringing him into the world; which, considering the miseries of human -life, was neither a benefit in itself, nor intended so by his parents, -whose thoughts, in their love encounters, were otherwise employed. Upon -these, and the like reasonings, their opinion is, that parents are -the last of all others to be trusted with the education of their own -children; and therefore they have in every town public nurseries, where -all parents, except cottagers and laborers, are obliged to send their -infants of both sexes to be reared and educated when they come to the age -of twenty moons, at which time they are supposed to have some rudiments -of docility. These schools are of several kinds, suited to different -qualities and to both sexes. They have certain professors well skilled -in preparing children for such a condition of life as befits the rank of -their parents, and their own capacities as well as inclinations. I shall -first say something of the male nurseries, and then of the female. - -The nurseries for males of noble or eminent birth are provided with -grave and learned professors, and their several deputies. The clothes -and food of the children are plain and simple. They are bred up in the -principles of honor, justice, courage, modesty, clemency, religion, and -love of their country; they are always employed in some business, except -in the times of eating and sleeping, which are very short, and two hours -for diversions, consisting of bodily exercises. They are dressed by -men till four years of age, and then are obliged to dress themselves, -although their quality be ever so great; and the women attendants, who -are aged proportionably to ours at fifty, perform only the most menial -offices. They are never suffered to converse with servants, but go -together, in smaller or greater numbers, to take their diversions, and -always in the presence of a professor or one of his deputies; whereby -they avoid those early bad impressions of folly and vice to which our -children are subject. Their parents are suffered to see them only twice -a year; the visit is to last but an hour; they are allowed to kiss the -child at meeting and parting; but a professor, who always stands by on -those occasions, will not suffer them to whisper, or use any fondling -expressions, or bring any presents of toys, sweetmeats, and the like. - -The pension from each family for the education and entertainment of a -child, upon failure of due payment, is levied by the emperor’s officers. - -The nurseries for children of ordinary gentlemen, merchants, traders, and -handicrafts, are managed proportionably after the same manner; only those -designed for trades are put out apprentices at eleven years old: whereas -those of persons of quality continue in their nurseries till fifteen, -which answers to twenty-one with us; but the confinement is gradually -lessened for the last three years. - -In the female nurseries, the young girls of quality are educated much -like the males, only they are dressed by orderly servants of their own -sex; but always in the presence of a professor or deputy, till they come -to dress themselves, which is at five years old. And if it be found -that these nurses ever presume to entertain the girls with frightful or -foolish stories, or the common follies practiced by chambermaids among -us, they are publicly whipped thrice about the city, imprisoned for a -year, and banished for life to the most desolate part of the country. -Thus the young ladies there are as much ashamed of being cowards and -fools as the men, and despise all personal ornaments beyond decency and -cleanliness. Neither did I perceive any difference in their education -made by their difference of sex, only that the exercises of the females -were not altogether so robust; and that some rules were given them -relating to domestic life, and a smaller compass of learning was enjoined -them: for their maxim is, that among people of quality, a wife should be -always a reasonable and agreeable companion, because she cannot always -be young. When the girls are twelve years old, which among them is the -marriageable age, their parents or guardians take them home with great -expressions of gratitude to the professors, and seldom without the tears -of the young lady and her companions. - -In the nurseries of females of the meaner sort, the children are -instructed in all kinds of work proper for their sex, and their several -degrees; those intended for apprentices are dismissed at nine years old, -the rest are kept to thirteen. - -The meaner families who have children at these nurseries are obliged, -besides their annual pension, which is as low as possible, to return to -the steward of the nursery a small monthly share of their gettings, to -be a portion for the child; and therefore all parents are limited in -their expenses by the law. For the Lilliputians think nothing can be more -unjust, than for people, in subservience to their own appetites, to bring -children into the world, and leave the burden of supporting them on the -public. As to persons of quality, they give security to appropriate a -certain sum for each child, suitable to their condition; and these funds -are always managed with good husbandry and the most exact justice. - -The cottagers and laborers keep their children at home, their business -being to till and cultivate the earth, and therefore their education -is of little consequence to the public; but the old and diseased among -them are supported by hospitals; for begging is a trade unknown in this -kingdom. - -And here it may, perhaps, divert the curious reader, to give some account -of my domestics, and my manner of living in this country, during a -residence of nine months and thirteen days. Having a head mechanically -turned, and being likewise forced by necessity, I had made for myself a -table and chair convenient enough, out of the largest trees in the royal -park. Two hundred seamstresses were employed to make me shirts, and -linen for my bed and table, all of the strongest and coarsest kind they -could get, which, however, they were forced to quilt together in several -folds, for the thickest was some degrees finer than lawn. Their linen is -usually three inches wide, and three feet make a piece. The seamstresses -took my measure as I lay on the ground, one standing at my neck, and -another at my mid-leg, with a strong cord extended, that each held by the -end, while a third measured the length of the cord with a rule an inch -long. Then they measured my right thumb, and desired no more; for by a -mathematical computation, that twice round the thumb is once round the -wrist, and so on to the neck and waist, and by the help of my old shirt, -which I displayed on the ground before them for a pattern, they fitted me -exactly. Three hundred tailors were employed in the same manner to make -me clothes; but they had another contrivance for taking my measure. I -kneeled down, and they raised a ladder from the ground to my neck; upon -this ladder one of them mounted, and let fall a plumb line from my collar -to the floor, which just answered the length of my coat; but my waist and -arms I measured myself. When my clothes were finished, which was done -in my house (for the largest of theirs would not have been able to hold -them) they looked like the patchwork made by the ladies in England, only -that mine were all of a color. - -I had three hundred cooks to dress my victuals, in little convenient huts -built about my house, where they and their families lived, and prepared -me two dishes apiece. I took up twenty waiters in my hand, and placed -them on the table; a hundred more attended below on the ground, some with -dishes of meat, and some with barrels of wine, and other liquors, slung -on their shoulders; all which the waiters above drew up as I wanted, in a -very ingenious manner by certain cords, as we draw a bucket up a well in -Europe. A dish of their meat was a good mouthful, and a barrel of their -liquor a reasonable draught. Their mutton yields to ours, but their beef -is excellent. I have had a sirloin so large, that I have been forced to -make three bites of it; but this is rare. My servants were astonished to -see me eat it, bones and all, as in our country we do the leg of a lark. -Their geese and turkeys I usually ate at a mouthful, and I confess they -far exceed ours. Of their smaller fowl I could take up twenty or thirty -at the end of my knife. - -One day his imperial majesty, being informed of my way of living, desired -that himself and his royal consort, with the young princes of the blood -of both sexes, might have the happiness, as he was pleased to call it, of -dining with me. They came accordingly, and I placed them in chairs of -state on my table, just over against me, with their guards about them. -Flimnap, the lord high-treasurer, attended there likewise, with his white -staff; and I observed he often looked on me with a sour countenance, -which I would not seem to regard, but ate more than usual, in honor to my -dear country, as well as to fill the court with admiration. I have some -private reasons to believe that this visit from his majesty gave Flimnap -an opportunity of doing me ill offices to his master. That minister had -always been my secret enemy, though he outwardly caressed me more than -was usual to the moroseness of his nature. He represented to the emperor -the low condition of his treasury; that he was forced to take up money at -great discount; that exchequer bills would not circulate under nine per -cent below par; that, in short, I had cost his majesty above a million -and a half of _sprugs_ (their greatest gold coin, about the bigness of a -spangle); and, upon the whole, it would be advisable in the emperor to -take the first fair occasion of dismissing me. - -[Illustration: “_I have passed many an afternoon very agreeably in these -conversations_” - -_Page 65_] - -I am here obliged to vindicate the reputation of an excellent lady, who -was an innocent sufferer on my account. The treasurer took a fancy to be -jealous of his wife, from the malice of some evil tongues, who informed -him that her grace had taken a violent affection for my person, and the -court scandal ran for some time, that she once came privately to my -lodging. This I solemnly declare to be a most infamous falsehood, without -any grounds, farther than that her grace was pleased to treat me with -all innocent marks of freedom and friendship. I own she came often to my -house, but always publicly, nor ever without three more in the coach, -who were usually her sister and young daughter, and some particular -acquaintance; but this was common to many other ladies of the court. And -I still appeal to my servants round, whether they at any time saw a coach -at my door without knowing what persons were in it. On these occasions, -when a servant had given me notice, my custom was to go immediately to -the door; and after paying my respects, to take up the coach and two -horses very carefully in my hands (for, if there were six horses, the -postilion always unharnessed four), and place them on a table, where I -had fixed a movable rim quite round, of five inches high, to prevent -accidents; and I have often had four coaches and horses at once on my -table full of company, while I sat in my chair, leaning my face towards -them; and when I was engaged with one set, the coachman would gently -drive the others round my table. I have passed many an afternoon very -agreeably in these conversations. But I defy the treasurer, or his two -informers (I will name them, and let ’em make the best of it), Clustril -and Drunlo, to prove that any person ever came to me incognito, except -the secretary Reldresal, who was sent by express command of his imperial -majesty, as I have before related. I should not have dwelt so long upon -this particular, if it had not been a point wherein the reputation of a -great lady is so nearly concerned, to say nothing of my own; though I -had then the honor to be a _nardac_, which the treasurer himself is not; -for all the world knows that he is only a _clumglum_, a title inferior -by one degree, as that of a marquis is to a duke in England; although -I allow he preceded me in right of his post. These false informations, -which I afterwards came to the knowledge of by an accident not proper to -mention, made Flimnap the treasurer show his lady for some time an ill -countenance, and me a worse; and although he was at last undeceived and -reconciled to her, yet I lost all credit with him, and found my interest -decline very fast with the emperor himself, who was, indeed, too much -governed by that favorite. - - - - -CHAPTER VII - - THE AUTHOR BEING INFORMED OF A DESIGN TO ACCUSE HIM OF HIGH - TREASON, MAKES HIS ESCAPE TO BLEFUSCU—HIS RECEPTION THERE. - - -Before I proceed to give an account of my leaving this kingdom, it may be -proper to inform the reader of a private intrigue which had been for two -months forming against me. I had been hitherto, all my life, a stranger -to courts, for which I was unqualified by the meanness of my condition. I -had indeed heard and read enough of the dispositions of great princes and -ministers; but never expected to have found such terrible effects of them -in so remote a country, governed, as I thought, by very different maxims -from those in Europe. - -When I was just preparing to pay my attendance on the emperor of -Blefuscu, a considerable person at court (to whom I had been very -serviceable at a time when he lay under the highest displeasure of his -imperial majesty), came to my house very privately at night, in a close -chair, and, without sending his name, desired admittance. The chairmen -were dismissed: I put the chair, with his lordship in it, into my coat -pocket; and giving orders to a trusty servant to say I was indisposed -and gone to sleep, I fastened the door of my house, placed the chair on -the table, according to my usual custom, and sat down by it. After the -common salutations were over, observing his lordship’s countenance full -of concern, and inquiring into the reason, he desired I would hear him -with patience in a matter that highly concerned my honor and my life. His -speech was to the following effect, for I took notes of it as soon as he -left me: - -“You are to know,” said he, “that several committees of council have been -lately called, in the most private manner, on your account; and it is but -two days since his majesty came to a full resolution. - -“You are very sensible that Skyresh Bolgolam (_galbet_, or high-admiral) -has been your mortal enemy almost ever since your arrival. His original -reasons I know not; but his hatred is increased since your great success -against Blefuscu, by which his glory as admiral is much obscured. This -lord, in conjunction with Flimnap the high-treasurer, whose enmity -against you is notorious on account of his lady, Limtoc the general, -Lalcon the chamberlain, and Balmuff the grand justiciary, have prepared -articles of impeachment against you, for treason and other capital -crimes.” - -This preface made me so impatient, being conscious of my own merits and -innocence, that I was going to interrupt him; when he entreated me to be -silent, and thus proceeded: - -“Out of gratitude for the favors you have done me, I procured information -of the whole proceedings, and a copy of the articles; wherein I venture -my head for your service.” - - ARTICLES OF IMPEACHMENT - AGAINST - QUINBUS FLESTRIN, THE MAN-MOUNTAIN - - ARTICLE I - - That the said Quinbus Flestrin, having brought the imperial - fleet of Blefuscu into the royal port, and being afterwards - commanded by his imperial majesty to seize all the other - ships of the said empire of Blefuscu, and reduce that empire - to a province, to be governed by a viceroy from hence, and - to destroy and put to death not only all the Big-endian - exiles, but likewise all the people of that empire who would - not immediately forsake the Big-endian heresy; he, the said - Flestrin, like a false traitor against his most auspicious, - serene, imperial majesty, did petition to be excused from the - said service, upon pretence or unwillingness to force the - consciences, or destroy the liberties and lives of an innocent - people. - - ARTICLE 2 - - That whereas certain ambassadors arrived from the court of - Blefuscu to sue for peace in his majesty’s court, he, the - said Flestrin, did, like a false traitor, aid, abet, comfort, - and divert the said ambassadors, although he knew them to - be servants to a prince who was lately an open enemy to his - imperial majesty, and in an open war against his said majesty. - - ARTICLE 3 - - That the said Quinbus Flestrin, contrary to the duty of a - faithful subject, is now preparing to make a voyage to the - court and empire of Blefuscu, for which he has received only - verbal license from his imperial majesty, and, under color of - the said license does falsely and traitorously intend to take - the said voyage, and thereby to aid, comfort, and abet the - emperor of Blefuscu, so late an enemy, and in open war with his - imperial majesty aforesaid. - - “There are some other articles; but these are the most - important, of which I have read you an abstract. - - “In the several debates upon this impeachment, it must be - confessed that his majesty gave many marks of his great lenity, - often urging the services you had done him, and endeavoring to - extenuate your crimes. The treasurer and admiral insisted that - you should be put to the most painful and ignominious death by - setting fire to your house at night; and the general was to - attend with twenty thousand men, armed with poisoned arrows to - shoot you on the face and hands. Some of your servants were to - have private orders to strew a poisonous juice on your shirts, - which would soon make you tear your own flesh, and die in the - utmost torture. The general came into the same opinion, so - that for a long time there was a majority against you; but his - majesty, resolving, if possible, to spare your life, at last - brought off the chamberlain. - - “Upon this incident, Reldresal, principal secretary for private - affairs, who always approved himself your true friend, was - commanded by the emperor to deliver his opinion, which he - accordingly did, and therein justified the good thoughts you - have of him. He allowed your crimes to be great, but that still - there was room for mercy, the most commendable virtue in a - prince, and for which his majesty was so justly celebrated. - He said the friendship between you and him was so well known - to the world that perhaps the most honorable board might - think him partial; however, in obedience to the command he - had received, he would freely offer his sentiments. That if - his majesty, in consideration of your services, and pursuant - to his own merciful disposition, would please to spare your - life, and only give orders to put out both your eyes, he humbly - conceived that, by this expedient, justice might in some - measure be satisfied, and all the world applaud the lenity of - the emperor, as well as the fair and generous proceedings of - those who have the honor to be his counselors. That the loss of - your eyes would be no impediment to your bodily strength, by - which you might still be useful to his majesty; that blindness - is an addition to courage, by concealing dangers from us; that - the fear you had for your eyes was the greatest difficulty in - bringing over the enemy’s fleet; and it would be sufficient for - you to see by the eyes of the ministers, since the greatest - princes do no more. - - “This proposal was received with the utmost disapprobation by - the whole board. Bolgolam, the admiral, could not preserve - his temper; but, rising up in fury, said he wondered how the - secretary durst presume to give his opinion for preserving the - life of a traitor; that the services you had performed were, - by all true reasons of state, the great aggravation of your - crimes; that the same strength which enabled you to bring over - the enemy’s fleet, might serve, upon the first discontent, to - carry it back; that he had good reasons to think you were a - Big-endian in your heart; and, as treason begins in the heart - before it appears in overt acts, so he accused you as a traitor - on that account, and therefore insisted you should be put to - death. - - “The treasurer was of the same opinion: he showed to what - straits his majesty’s revenue was reduced by the charge of - maintaining you, which would soon grow insupportable; that - the secretary’s expedient of putting out your eyes was so far - from being a remedy against this evil, that it would probably - increase it, as is manifest from the common practice of - blinding some kind of fowl, after which they fed the faster and - grew sooner fat; that his sacred majesty and the council, who - are your judges, were in their own consciences fully convinced - of your guilt, which was a sufficient argument to condemn you - to death, without the formal proofs required by the strict - letter of the law. - - “But his imperial majesty, fully determined against capital - punishment, was graciously pleased to say, that since the - council thought the loss of your eyes too easy a censure, - some other may be inflicted hereafter. And your friend the - secretary, humbly desiring to be heard again, in answer to what - the treasurer had objected concerning the great charge his - majesty was at in maintaining you, said that his excellency, - who had the sole disposal of the emperor’s revenue, might - easily provide against that evil by gradually lessening your - establishment; by which, for want of sufficient food, you will - grow weak and faint, and lose your appetite, and consequently - decay and consume in a few months; neither would the stench - of your carcass be then so dangerous, when it should become - more than half diminished; and immediately upon your death, - five or six thousand of his majesty’s subjects might, in two - or three days, cut your flesh from your bones, take it away by - cartloads, and bury it in distant parts, to prevent infection, - leaving the skeleton as a monument of admiration to posterity. - - “Thus by the great friendship of the secretary, the whole - affair was compromised. It was strictly enjoined that the - project of starving you by degrees should be kept a secret; - but the sentence of putting out your eyes was entered on the - books; none dissenting except Bolgolam the admiral, who, being - a creature of the empress, was perpetually instigated by her - majesty to insist upon your death, she having borne perpetual - malice against you. - - “In three days your friend the secretary will be directed - to come to your house, and read before you the articles of - impeachment; and then to signify the great lenity and favor - of his majesty and council, whereby you are only condemned to - the loss of your eyes, which his majesty does not question - you will gratefully and humbly submit to; and twenty of his - majesty’s surgeons will attend, in order to see the operation - well performed, by discharging very sharp-pointed arrows into - the balls of your eyes, as you lie on the ground. - - “I leave to your prudence what measures you will take; and to - avoid suspicion, I must immediately return in as private a - manner as I came.” - -His lordship did so; and I remained alone, under many doubts and -perplexities of mind. - -It was a custom introduced by this prince and his ministry (very -different, as I have been assured, from the practices of former times), -that after the court had decreed any cruel execution, either to gratify -the monarch’s resentment, or the malice of a favorite, the emperor made a -speech to his whole council, expressing his great lenity and tenderness -as qualities known and confessed by all the world. This speech was -immediately published through the kingdom; nor did anything terrify the -people so much as those encomiums on his majesty’s mercy; because it was -observed that the more these praises were enlarged and insisted on, the -more inhuman was the punishment, and the sufferer more innocent. And -as to myself, I must confess, having never been designed for a courtier -either by my birth or education, I was so ill a judge of things that I -could not discover the lenity and favor of this sentence, but conceived -it (perhaps erroneously) rather to be rigorous than gentle. I sometimes -thought of standing my trial; for, although I could not deny the facts -alleged in the several articles, yet I hoped they would admit of some -extenuations. But having in my life perused many state trials, which I -ever observed to terminate as the judges thought fit to direct, I durst -not rely on so dangerous a decision, in so critical a juncture, and -against such powerful enemies. Once I was strongly bent upon resistance; -for while I had liberty, the whole strength of that empire could hardly -subdue me, and I might easily with stones pelt the metropolis to pieces; -but I soon rejected that project with horror, by remembering the oath I -had made to the emperor, the favors I received from him, and the high -title of _nardac_ he conferred upon me. Neither had I so soon learned the -gratitude of courtiers, to persuade myself that his majesty’s present -severities quitted me of all past obligations. - -At last I fixed upon a resolution for which it is probable I may incur -some censure, and not unjustly, for I confess I owe the preserving of -my eyes, and consequently my liberty, to my own great rashness and want -of experience; because, if I had then known the nature of princes and -ministers, which I have since observed in many other courts, and their -methods of treating criminals less obnoxious than myself, I should with -great alacrity and readiness have submitted to so easy a punishment. -But hurried on by the precipitancy of youth, and having his imperial -majesty’s license to pay my attendance upon the emperor of Blefuscu, I -took this opportunity, before the three days were elapsed, to send a -letter to my friend the secretary signifying my resolution of setting -out that morning for Blefuscu, pursuant to the leave I had got; and -without waiting for an answer, I went to that side of the island where -our fleet lay. I seized a large man of war, tied a cable to the prow, and -lifting up the anchors, I stripped myself, put my clothes (together with -my coverlet, which I brought under my arm) into the vessel, and drawing -it after me, between wading and swimming, arrived at the royal port of -Blefuscu, where the people had long expected me; they lent me two guides -to direct me to the capital city, which is of the same name. I held them -in my hands till I came within two hundred yards of the gate, and desired -them to signify my arrival to one of the secretaries, and let him know I -there waited his majesty’s commands. I had an answer in about an hour, -that his majesty, attended by the royal family, and great officers of -the court, was coming out to receive me. I advanced a hundred yards. The -emperor and his train alighted from their horses, the empress and ladies -from their coaches, and I did not perceive they were in any fright or -concern. I lay on the ground to kiss his majesty’s and the empress’s -hands. I told his majesty that I was come according to my promise, and -with the license of the emperor my master, to have the honor of seeing so -mighty a monarch, and to offer him any service in my power, consistent -with my duty to my own prince; not mentioning a word of my disgrace, -because I had hitherto no regular information of it, and might suppose -myself wholly ignorant of any such design; neither could I reasonably -conceive that the emperor would discover the secret while I was out of -his power; wherein, however, it soon appeared I was deceived. - -I shall not trouble the reader with the particular account of my -reception at this court, which was suitable to the generosity of so great -a prince; nor of the difficulties I was in for want of a house and bed, -being forced to lie on the ground, wrapped up in my coverlet. - - - - -CHAPTER VIII - - THE AUTHOR, BY A LUCKY ACCIDENT, FINDS MEANS TO LEAVE BLEFUSCU; - AND, AFTER SOME DIFFICULTIES, RETURNS SAFE TO HIS NATIVE - COUNTRY. - - -Three days after my arrival, walking out of curiosity to the northeast -coast of the island, I observed, about half a league off in the sea, -somewhat that looked like a boat overturned. I pulled off my shoes and -stockings, and wading two or three hundred yards, I found the object to -approach nearer by force of the tide; and then plainly saw it to be a -real boat, which I supposed might by some tempest have been driven from -a ship; whereupon I returned immediately towards the city, and desired -his imperial majesty to lend me twenty of the tallest vessels he had -left after the loss of his fleet, and three thousand seamen, under the -command of his vice-admiral. This fleet sailed round, while I went back -the shortest way to the coast where I first discovered the boat. I found -the tide had driven it still nearer. The seamen were all provided with -cordage, which I had beforehand twisted to a sufficient strength. When -the ships came up, I stripped myself, and waded till I came within a -hundred yards of the boat, after which I was forced to swim till I got -up to it. The seamen threw me the end of the cord, which I fastened to a -hole in the fore part of the boat, and the other end to a man of war; but -I found all my labor to little purpose; for, being out of my depth, I was -not able to work. In this necessity I was forced to swim behind, and push -the boat forward as often as I could, with one of my hands; and the tide -favoring me, I advanced so far that I could just hold up my chin and -feel the ground. I rested two or three minutes, and then gave the boat -another shove, and so on, till the sea was no higher than my arm-pits; -and now the most laborious part being over, I took out my other cables, -which were stowed in one of the ships, and fastening them first to the -boat, and then to nine of the vessels which attended me; the wind being -favorable, the seamen towed, and I shoved, until we arrived within forty -yards of the shore, and waiting till the tide was out, I got dry to the -boat, and by the assistance of two thousand men with ropes and engines, -I made a shift to turn it on its bottom, and found it was but little -damaged. - -I shall not trouble the reader with the difficulties I was under by -the help of certain paddles, which cost me ten days’ making, to get my -boat to the royal port of Blefuscu, where a mighty concourse of people -appeared upon my arrival, full of wonder at the sight of so prodigious -a vessel. I told the emperor that my good fortune had thrown this boat -in my way, to carry me to some place whence I might return into my -native country; and begged his majesty’s orders for getting materials to -fit it up, together with his license to depart; which, after some kind -expostulations, he was pleased to grant. - -I did very much wonder, in all this time, not to have heard of any -express relating to me from our emperor to the court of Blefuscu. But I -was afterwards given privately to understand that his imperial majesty, -never imagining I had the least notice of his designs, believed I was -only gone to Blefuscu in performance of my promise, according to the -license he had given me, which was well known at our court, and would -return in a few days, when that ceremony was ended. But he was at last -in pain at my long absence; and after consulting with the treasurer and -the rest of that cabal, a person of quality was dispatched with the copy -of the articles against me. This envoy had instructions to represent to -the monarch of Blefuscu, the great lenity of his master, who was content -to punish me no further than with the loss of my eyes; that I had fled -from justice, and if I did not return in two hours, I should be deprived -of my title of nardac and declared a traitor. The envoy further added, -that in order to maintain the peace and amity between both empires, his -master expected that his brother of Blefuscu would give orders to have me -sent back to Lilliput, bound hand and foot, to be punished as a traitor. - -The emperor of Blefuscu, having taken three days to consult, returned an -answer consisting of many civilities and excuses. He said that, as for -sending me bound, his brother knew it was impossible; that although I -had deprived him of his fleet, yet he owed great obligations to me for -many good offices I had done him in making the peace. That, however, both -their majesties would soon be made easy; for I had found a prodigious -vessel on the shore, able to carry me on the sea, which he had given -orders to fit up, with my own assistance and direction; and he hoped -in a few weeks both empires would be freed from so insupportable an -incumbrance. - -With this answer the envoy returned to Lilliput, and the monarch of -Blefuscu related to me all that had passed, offering me at the same time -(but under the strictest confidence) his gracious protection if I would -continue in his service; wherein, although I believed him sincere, yet I -resolved never more to put any confidence in princes or ministers, where -I could possibly avoid it; and therefore, with all due acknowledgments -for his favorable intentions, I humbly begged to be excused. I told him -that since fortune, whether good or evil, had thrown a vessel in my way, -I was resolved to venture myself on the ocean, rather than be an occasion -of difference between two such mighty monarchs. Neither did I find the -emperor at all displeased; and I discovered, by a certain accident, that -he was very glad of my resolution, and so were most of his ministers. - -These considerations moved me to hasten my departure somewhat sooner than -I intended; to which the court, impatient to have me gone, very readily -contributed. Five hundred workmen were employed to make two sails to my -boat, according to my directions, by quilting thirteen folds of their -strongest linen together. I was at the pains of making ropes and cables, -by twisting ten, twenty, or thirty of the thickest and strongest of -theirs. A great stone that I happened to find, after a long search, by -the seashore, served me for an anchor. I had the tallow of three hundred -cows for greasing my boat, and other uses. I was at incredible pains in -cutting down some of the largest timber trees for oars and masts, wherein -I was, however, much assisted by his majesty’s ship-carpenters, who -helped me in smoothing them, after I had done the rough work. - -In about a month, when all was prepared, I sent to receive his majesty’s -commands, and to take my leave. The emperor and royal family came out -of the palace; I lay down on my face to kiss his hand, which he very -graciously gave me; so did the empress and young princess of the blood. -His majesty presented me with fifty purses of two hundred _sprugs_ -apiece, together with his picture at full length, which I put immediately -into one of my gloves, to keep it from being hurt. The ceremonies at my -departure were too many to trouble the reader with at this time. - -I stored the boat with the carcasses of a hundred oxen and three hundred -sheep, with bread and drink proportionable, and as much meat ready -dressed as four hundred cooks could provide. I took with me six cows and -two bulls alive, with as many ewes and rams, intending to carry them -into my own country and propagate the breed; and to feed them on board, -I had a good bundle of hay and a bag of corn. I would gladly have taken -a dozen of the natives, but this was a thing the emperor would by no -means permit; and besides a diligent search into my pockets, his majesty -engaged my honor not to carry away any of his subjects, although with -their own consent and desire. - -Having thus prepared all things as well as I was able, I set sail on -the twenty-fourth day of September, 1701, at six in the morning; and -when I had gone about four leagues to the northward, the wind being at -southeast, at six in the evening I descried a small island about half a -league to the northwest. I advanced forward, and cast anchor on the lee -side of the island, which seemed to be uninhabited. I then took some -refreshment and went to my rest. I slept well, and I conjecture at least -six hours, for I found the day broke in two hours after I awaked. It was -a clear night. I ate my breakfast before the sun was up, and heaving -anchor, the wind being favorable, I steered the same course that I had -done the day before, wherein I was directed by my pocket compass. My -intention was to reach, if possible, one of those islands which I had -reason to believe lay to the northeast of Van Diemen’s Land. I discovered -nothing all that day; but upon the next, about three in the afternoon, -when I had by my computation made twenty-four leagues from Blefuscu, I -descried a sail steering to the southeast; my course was due east. I -hailed her, but could get no answer; yet I found I gained upon her, for -the wind slackened. I made all the sail I could, and in half an hour she -spied me, then hung out her ancient, and discharged a gun. It is not -easy to express the joy I was in, upon the unexpected hope of once more -seeing my beloved country and the dear pledges I had left in it. The -ship slackened her sails, and I came up with her between five and six in -the evening, September twenty-sixth; but my heart leaped within me to -see her English colors. I put my cows and sheep into my coat pockets and -got on board with all my little cargo of provisions. The vessel was an -English merchantman returning from Japan by the North and South seas; the -captain, Mr. John Biddel of Deptford, a very civil man and an excellent -sailor. We were now in the latitude of 30 degrees south. There were about -fifty men in the ship; and here I met an old comrade of mine, one Peter -Williams, who gave me a good character to the captain. This gentleman -treated me with kindness and desired I would let him know what place I -came from last, and whither I was bound; which I did in few words, but he -thought I was raving, and that the dangers I underwent had disturbed my -head; whereupon I took my black cattle and sheep out of my pocket, which, -after great astonishment, clearly convinced him of my veracity. I then -showed him the gold given me by the emperor of Blefuscu, together with -his majesty’s picture at full length, and some other rarities of that -country. I gave him two purses of two hundred _sprugs_ each, and promised -when we arrived in England to make him a present of a cow and a sheep big -with young. - -I shall not trouble the reader with a particular account of this voyage, -which was very prosperous for the most part. We arrived in the Downs on -the 13th of April, 1702. I had only one misfortune, that the rats on -board carried away one of my sheep; I found her bones in a hole, picked -clean from the flesh. The rest of my cattle I got safe on shore, and -set them a-grazing on a bowling green at Greenwich, where the fineness -of the grass made them feed very heartily, though I had always feared -the contrary: neither could I possibly have preserved them in so long a -voyage if the captain had not allowed me some of his best biscuit, which, -rubbed to powder and mingled with water, was their constant food. The -short time I continued in England I made a considerable profit by showing -my cattle to many persons of quality and others; and before I began my -second voyage I sold them for six hundred pounds. Since my last return I -find the breed is considerably increased, especially the sheep; which I -hope will prove much to the advantage of the woolen manufacture, by the -fineness of the fleeces. - -I stayed but two months with my wife and family, for my insatiable desire -of seeing foreign countries would suffer me to continue no longer. I -left fifteen hundred pounds with my wife, and fixed her in a good house -at Redriff. My remaining stock I carried with me, part in money and part -in goods, in hopes to improve my fortunes. My eldest uncle, John, had -left me an estate in land near Epping of about thirty pounds a year, and -I had a long lease of the Black Bull in Fetter Lane, which yielded me -as much more; so that I was not in any danger of leaving my family upon -the parish. My son Johnny, named so after his uncle, was at the grammar -school, and a towardly child. My daughter Betty (who is now well married -and has children) was then at her needlework. I took leave of my wife and -boy and girl with tears on both sides, and went on board the Adventure, -a merchant ship of three hundred tons, bound for Surat, Captain John -Nicholas of Liverpool, commander. But my account of this voyage must be -referred to the Second Part of my travels. - - -THE END OF THE FIRST PART. - - - - -A VOYAGE TO BROBDINGNAG - - - - -CHAPTER I - - A GREAT STORM DESCRIBED; THE LONGBOAT SENT TO FETCH WATER; - THE AUTHOR GOES WITH IT TO DISCOVER THE COUNTRY—HE IS LEFT - ON SHORE; IS SEIZED BY ONE OF THE NATIVES, AND CARRIED TO A - FARMER’S HOUSE— HIS RECEPTION THERE, WITH SEVERAL ACCIDENTS - THAT HAPPENED TO HIM—A DESCRIPTION OF THE INHABITANTS. - - -Having been condemned by nature and fortune to an active and restless -life, in two months after my return I again left my native country -and took shipping in the Downs on the 20th day of June, 1702, in the -Adventure, Captain John Nicholas, a Cornishman, commander, bound for -Surat. We had a very prosperous gale till we arrived at the Cape of -Good Hope, where we landed for fresh water; but discovering a leak, we -unshipped our goods and wintered there; for the captain falling sick of -an ague, we could not leave the Cape till the end of March. We then set -sail, and had a good voyage till we passed the straits of Madagascar; -but having got northward of that island, and to about five degrees south -latitude, the winds, which in those seas are observed to blow a constant -equal gale between the north and west from the beginning of December -to the beginning of May, on the 19th of April began to blow with much -greater violence and more westerly than usual, continuing so for twenty -days together; during which time we were driven a little to the east of -the Molucca Islands, and about three degrees northward of the line, as -our captain found by an observation he took the 2d of May, at which time -the wind ceased, and it was a perfect calm; whereat I was not a little -rejoiced. But he, being a man well experienced in the navigation of those -seas, bid us all prepare against a storm, which accordingly happened on -the day following; for a southern wind, called the southern monsoon, -began to set in. - -Finding it was like to overblow, we took in our spritsail, and stood by -to hand the foresail; but making foul weather, we looked if the guns -were all fast, and handed the mizzen. The ship lay very broad off, so we -thought it better spooning before the sea, than trying or hulling. We -reefed the foresail and set him, and hauled aft the foresheet; the helm -was hard a-weather. The ship wore bravely. We belayed the fore-downhaul; -but the sail was split, and we hauled down the yard and got the sail -into the ship, and unbound all the things clear of it. It was a very -fierce storm; the sea broke strange and dangerous. We hauled off upon the -lanyard of the whipstaff and helped the man at helm. We would not get -down our topmast, but let all stand, because she scudded before the sea -very well, and we knew that the topmast being aloft, the ship was the -wholesomer and made better way through the sea, seeing we had sea room. -When the storm was over we set foresail and mainsail and brought the ship -to. Then we set the mizzen, main-topsail and the fore-topsail. Our course -was east-north-east, the wind was at southwest. We got the starboard -tacks aboard; we cast off our weather braces and lifts; we set in the lee -braces and hauled forward by the weather bowlings, and hauled them tight, -and belayed them, and hauled over the mizzen-tack to windward, and kept -her full and by as near as she would lie. - -During this storm, which was followed by a strong wind west-south-west, -we were carried, by my computation, about five hundred leagues to the -east, so that the oldest sailor on board could not tell in what part of -the world we were. Our provisions held out well, our ship was stanch, and -our crew all in good health; but we lay in the utmost distress for water. -We thought it best to hold on the same course rather than turn more -northerly, which might have brought us to the northwest parts of Great -Tartary and into the Frozen Sea. - -On the 16th day of June, 1703, a boy on the topmast discovered land. On -the 17th we came in full view of a great island, or continent (for we -knew not whether), on the south side whereof was a small neck of land -jutting out into the sea, and a creek too shallow to hold a ship of above -one hundred tons. We cast anchor within a league of this creek, and our -captain sent a dozen of his men well armed in the longboat, with vessels -for water, if any could be found. I desired his leave to go with them, -that I might see the country and make what discoveries I could. When we -came to land we saw no river or spring, nor any sign of inhabitants. Our -men therefore wandered on the shore to find out some fresh water near the -sea, and I walked alone about a mile on the other side, where I observed -the country all barren and rocky. I now began to be weary, and seeing -nothing to entertain my curiosity, I returned gently down towards the -creek; and the sea being full in my view, I saw our men already got into -the boat and rowing for life to the ship. I was going to holla after -them, although it had been to little purpose, when I observed a huge -creature walking after them in the sea, as fast as he could; he waded -not much deeper than his knees, and took prodigious strides. But our -men had the start of him half a league, and the sea thereabouts being -full of sharp-pointed rocks, the monster was not able to overtake the -boat. This I was afterwards told, for I durst not stay to see the issue -of that adventure, but ran as fast as I could the way I first went, and -then climbed up a steep hill which gave me some prospect of the country. -I found it fully cultivated; but that which first surprised me was the -length of the grass, which, in those grounds that seemed to be kept for -hay, was above twenty feet high. - -I fell into a highroad, for so I took it to be, though it served to the -inhabitants only as a footpath through a field of barley. Here I walked -on for some time, but could see little on either side, it being now -near harvest, and the corn rising at least forty feet. I was an hour -walking to the end of this field, which was fenced in with a hedge of at -least one hundred and twenty feet high, and the trees so lofty that I -could make no computation of their altitude. There was a stile to pass -from this field into the next. It had four steps, and a stone to cross -over when you came to the uppermost. It was impossible for me to climb -this stile, because every step was six feet high, and the upper stone -above twenty. I was endeavoring to find some gap in the hedge, when I -discovered one of the inhabitants in the next field advancing towards -the stile, of the same size with him whom I saw in the sea pursuing our -boat. He appeared as tall as an ordinary spire steeple, and took about -ten yards at every stride, as near as I could guess. I was struck with -the utmost fear and astonishment, and ran to hide myself in the corn, -whence I saw him at the top of the stile looking back into the next field -on the right hand, and heard him call in a voice many degrees louder than -a speaking trumpet; but the noise was so high in the air, that at first I -certainly thought it was thunder. Whereupon seven monsters like himself -came towards him with reaping hooks in their hands, each hook about the -largeness of six scythes. These people were not so well clad as the -first, whose servants or laborers they seemed to be; for, upon some words -he spoke, they went to reap the corn in the field where I lay. I kept -from them at as great a distance as I could, but was forced to move with -extreme difficulty, for the stalks of the corn were sometimes not above -a foot distant, so that I could hardly squeeze my body betwixt them. -However, I made a shift to go forward till I came to a part of the field -where the corn had been laid by the rain and wind. Here it was impossible -for me to advance a step; for the stalks were so interwoven that I -could not creep through, and the beards of the fallen ears so strong -and pointed that they pierced through my clothes into my flesh. At the -same time I heard the reapers not above a hundred yards behind me. Being -quite dispirited with toil, and wholly overcome by grief and despair, I -lay down between two ridges, and heartily wished I might there end my -days. I bemoaned my desolate widow and fatherless children. I lamented -my own folly and willfulness in attempting a second voyage against the -advice of all my friends and relations. In this terrible agitation of -mind I could not forbear thinking of Lilliput, whose inhabitants looked -upon me as the greatest prodigy that ever appeared in the world; where -I was able to draw an imperial fleet in my hand, and perform those -other actions which will be recorded forever in the chronicles of that -empire, while posterity shall hardly believe them, although attested by -millions. I reflected what a mortification it must prove to me to appear -as inconsiderable in this nation as one single Lilliputian would be among -us. But this I conceived was to be the least of my misfortunes; for, as -human creatures are observed to be more savage and cruel in proportion to -their bulk, what could I expect but to be a morsel in the mouth of the -first among these enormous barbarians that should happen to seize me? -Undoubtedly philosophers are in the right when they tell us that nothing -is great or little otherwise than by comparison. It might have pleased -fortune to let the Lilliputians find some nation where the people were as -diminutive with respect to them, as they were to me. And who knows but -that even this prodigious race of mortals might be equally overmatched -in some distant part of the world, whereof we have yet no discovery? -Scared and confounded as I was, I could not forbear going on with these -reflections, when one of the reapers approaching within ten yards of the -ridge where I lay, made me apprehend that with the next step I should be -squashed to death under his foot, or cut in two with his reaping hook. -And therefore when he was again about to move, I screamed as loud as fear -could make me; whereupon the huge creature trod short, and looking round -about under him for some time, at last espied me as I lay on the ground. -He considered awhile, with the caution of one who endeavors to lay hold -on a small dangerous animal in such a manner that it shall not be -able either to scratch or to bite him, as I myself have sometimes done -with a weasel in England. At length he ventured to take me up behind, -by the middle, between his forefinger and thumb, and brought me within -three yards of his eyes, that he might behold my shape more perfectly. -I guessed his meaning, and my good fortune gave me so much presence of -mind, that I resolved not to struggle in the least as he held me in the -air above sixty feet from the ground, although he grievously pinched -my sides, for fear I should slip through his fingers. All I ventured -was to raise my eyes towards the sun and place my hands together in a -supplicating posture, and to speak some words in a humble melancholy -tone, suitable to the condition I then was in; for I apprehended every -moment that he would dash me against the ground, as we usually do any -little hateful animal which we have a mind to destroy. But my good star -would have it, that he appeared pleased with my voice and gestures, and -began to look upon me as a curiosity, much wondering to hear me pronounce -articulate words, although he could not understand them. In the meantime -I was not able to forbear groaning and shedding tears, and turning -my head towards my sides; letting him know, as well as I could, how -cruelly I was hurt by the pressure of his thumb and finger. He seemed to -apprehend my meaning; for, lifting up the lappet of his coat, he put me -gently into it, and immediately ran along with me to his master, who was -a substantial farmer, and the same person I had first seen in the field. - -The farmer having (as I supposed by their talk) received such an account -of me as his servant could give him, took a piece of a small straw, about -the size of a walking staff, and therewith lifted up the lappets of -my coat, which, it seems, he thought to be some kind of covering that -nature had given me. He blew my hair aside to take a better view of my -face. He called his hands about him, and asked them, as I afterwards -learned, whether they had ever seen in the fields any little creature -that resembled me. He then placed me softly on the ground upon all fours, -but I got immediately up, and walked slowly backwards and forwards, to -let those people see I had no intent to run away. They all sat down in a -circle about me, the better to observe my motions. I pulled off my hat, -and made a low bow towards the farmer. I fell on my knees, and lifted up -my hands and eyes, and spoke several words as loud as I could. I took -a purse of gold out of my pocket, and humbly presented it to him. He -received it on the palm of his hand, then applied it close to his eye to -see what it was, and afterwards turned it several times with the point of -a pin (which he took out of his sleeve), but could make nothing of it. -Whereupon I made a sign that he should place his hand on the ground. I -then took the purse, and opening it, poured all the gold into his palm. -There were six Spanish pieces of four pistoles each, besides twenty or -thirty smaller coins. I saw him wet the tip of his little finger upon -his tongue, and take up one of my largest pieces, and then another, but -he seemed to be wholly ignorant what they were. He made me a sign to put -them again into my purse, and the purse again into my pocket, which after -offering it to him several times, I thought it best to do. - -The farmer by this time was convinced I must be a rational creature. -He spoke often to me, but the sound of his voice pierced my ears like -that of a watermill, yet his words were articulate enough. I answered as -loud as I could in several languages, and he often laid his ear within -two yards of me, but all in vain, for we were wholly unintelligible to -each other. He then sent his servants to their work, and taking his -handkerchief out of his pocket, he doubled and spread it on his left -hand, which he placed flat on the ground with the palm upwards, making -me a sign to step into it, as I could easily do, for it was not above -a foot in thickness. I thought it my part to obey, and, for fear of -falling, laid myself at full length upon the handkerchief, with the -remainder of which he lapped me up to the head for further security, and -in this manner carried me home to his house. There he called his wife, -and showed me to her; but she screamed and ran back, as women in England -do at the sight of a toad or a spider. However, when she had awhile seen -my behavior, and how well I observed the signs her husband made, she was -soon reconciled, and by degrees grew extremely tender of me. - -It was about twelve at noon and a servant brought in dinner. It was -only one substantial dish of meat (fit for the plain condition of a -husbandman), in a dish of about four-and-twenty feet diameter. The -company were the farmer and his wife, three children, and an old -grandmother. When they were sat down, the farmer placed me at some -distance from him on the table, which was thirty feet high from the -floor. I was in a terrible fright, and kept as far as I could from the -edge for fear of falling. The wife minced a bit of meat, then crumbled -some bread on a trencher, and placed it before me. I made her a low bow, -took out my knife and fork, and fell to eat, which gave them exceeding -delight. The mistress sent her maid for a small dram cup, which held -about three gallons, and filled it with drink; I took up the vessel -with much difficulty in both hands, and in a most respectful manner -drank to her ladyship’s health, expressing the words as loud as I could -in English, which made the company laugh so heartily that I was almost -deafened with the noise. This liquor tasted like a small cider, and was -not unpleasant. Then the master made me a sign to come to his trencher -side; but as I walked on the table, being in great surprise all the time, -as the indulgent reader will easily conceive and excuse, I happened -to stumble against a crust, and fell flat on my face, but received no -hurt. I got up immediately, and observing the good people to be in much -concern, I took my hat (which I held under my arm out of good manners), -and waving it over my head, gave three huzzas, to show I had got no -mischief by my fall. But advancing forwards towards my master (as I shall -henceforth call him), his youngest son, who sat next to him, an arch boy -of about ten years old, took me up by the legs, and held me so high in -the air that I trembled in every limb; but his father snatched me from -him, and at the same time gave him such a box on the left ear as would -have felled a European troop of horse to the earth, ordering him to be -taken from the table. But being afraid the boy might owe me a spite, and -well remembering how mischievous all children among us naturally are to -sparrows, rabbits, young kittens, and puppy dogs, I fell on my knees, and -pointing to the boy, made my master to understand as well as I could, -that I desired his son might be pardoned. The father complied, and the -lad took his seat again, whereupon I went to him and kissed his hand, -which my master took, and made him stroke me gently with it. - -In the midst of dinner, my mistress’s favorite cat leaped into her lap. -I heard a noise behind me like that of a dozen stocking weavers at work; -and turning my head, I found it proceeded from the purring of this -animal, who seemed to be three times larger than an ox, as I computed -by the view of her head, and one of her paws, while her mistress was -feeding and stroking her. The fierceness of this creature’s countenance -altogether discomposed me, though I stood at the further end of the -table, above fifty feet off; and though my mistress held her fast, -for fear she might give a spring, and seize me in her talons. But it -happened there was no danger, for the cat took not the least notice of me -when my master placed me within three yards of her. And as I have been -always told, and found true by experience in my travels, that flying, -or discovering fear, before a fierce animal is a certain way to make it -pursue or attack you; so I resolved, in this dangerous juncture, to show -no manner of concern. I walked with intrepidity five or six times before -the very head of the cat, and came within half a yard of her; whereupon -she drew herself back, as if she were more afraid of me. I had less -apprehension concerning the dogs, whereof three or four came into the -room, as it is usual in farmers’ houses; one of which was a mastiff equal -in bulk to four elephants, and a grey-hound somewhat taller than the -mastiff, but not so large. - -When dinner was almost done, the nurse came in with a child of a year old -in her arms, who immediately spied me, and began a squall that you might -have heard from London Bridge to Chelsea, after the usual oratory of -infants, to get me for a plaything. The mother, out of pure indulgence, -took me up, and put me towards the child, who presently seized me by the -middle, and got my head in his mouth, where I roared so loud that the -urchin was frighted, and let me drop; and I should infallibly have broke -my neck, if the mother had not held her apron under me. The nurse, to -quiet her babe, made use of a rattle, which was a kind of hollow vessel -filled with great stones, and fastened by a cable to the child’s waist; -but all in vain, so that she was forced to apply the last remedy by -giving it suck. I must confess no object ever disgusted me so much as the -sight of her monstrous breast, which I cannot tell what to compare with, -so as to give the curious reader an idea of its bulk, shape, and color. I -had a near sight of her, she sitting down the more conveniently to give -suck, and I standing on the table. This made me reflect upon the fair -skins of our English ladies, who appear so beautiful to us only because -they are of our own size, and their defects not to be seen but through -a magnifying glass; where we find by experiment that the smoothest and -whitest skins look rough and coarse, and ill colored. - -I remember when I was at Lilliput, the complexions of those diminutive -people appeared to me the fairest in the world; and talking upon this -subject with a person of learning there, who was an intimate friend of -mine, he said that my face appeared much fairer and smoother when he -looked on me from the ground, than it did upon a nearer view when I took -him up in my hand and brought him close, which he confessed was at first -a very shocking sight. He said he could discover great holes in my skin; -that the stumps of my beard were ten times stronger than the bristles -of a boar, and my complexion made up of several colors, altogether -disagreeable. Although I must beg leave to say for myself, that I am as -fair as most of my sex and country, and very little sunburned by all my -travels. On the other side, discoursing of the ladies in that emperor’s -court, he used to tell me one had freckles, another too wide a mouth, a -third too large a nose; nothing of which I was able to distinguish. I -confess this reflection was obvious enough; which, however, I could not -forbear, lest the reader might think those vast creatures were actually -deformed: for I must do them the justice to say they are a comely race -of people; and particularly the features of my master’s countenance, -although he were but a farmer, when I beheld him from the height of sixty -feet, appeared very well proportioned. - -[Illustration: “_These horrible animals had the boldness to attack me on -both sides_” - -_Page 98_] - -When dinner was done, my master went out to his laborers, and as I could -discover by his voice and gesture, gave his wife a strict charge to -take care of me. I was very much tired and disposed to sleep, which my -mistress perceiving, she put me on her own bed, and covered me with a -clean white handkerchief, but larger and coarser than the mainsail of a -man of war. - -I slept about two hours, and dreamed I was at home with my wife and -children, which aggravated my sorrows when I awaked and found myself -alone in a vast room, between two and three hundred feet wide, and above -two hundred high, lying in a bed twenty yards wide. My mistress was gone -about her household affairs, and had locked me in. The bed was eight -yards from the floor. While I was under these circumstances, two rats -crept up the curtains, and ran smelling backwards and forwards on the -bed. One of them came up almost to my face, whereupon I rose in a fright, -and drew out my hanger to defend myself. These horrible animals had the -boldness to attack me on both sides, and one of them held his forefeet at -my collar; but I had the good fortune to rip up his belly before he could -do me any mischief. He fell down at my feet, and the other, seeing the -fate of his comrade, made his escape, but not without one good wound on -the back, which I gave him as he fled, and made the blood run trickling -from him. After this exploit I walked gently to and fro on the bed, to -recover my breath and loss of spirits. These creatures were of the size -of a large mastiff, but infinitely more nimble and fierce; so that if I -had taken off my belt before I went to sleep, I must have infallibly been -torn to pieces and devoured. I measured the tail of the dead rat, and -found it to be two yards long, wanting an inch; but it went against my -stomach to drag the carcass off the bed, where it lay still bleeding. I -observed it had yet some life, but with a strong slash across the neck I -thoroughly dispatched it. - -Soon after, my mistress came into the room, who seeing me all bloody, ran -and took me up in her hand. I pointed to the dead rat, smiling and making -other signs to show I was not hurt, whereat she was extremely rejoiced, -calling the maid to take up the dead rat with a pair of tongs, and throw -it out of the window. Then she set me on a table, where I showed her my -hanger all bloody, and wiping it on the lappet of my coat returned it to -the scabbard. - -I hope the gentle reader will excuse me for dwelling on particulars, -which, however insignificant they may appear to groveling vulgar minds, -yet will certainly help a philosopher to enlarge his thoughts and -imagination, and apply them to the benefit of public as well as private -life, which was my sole design in presenting this and other accounts of -my travels to the world; wherein I have been chiefly studious of truth, -without affecting any ornaments of learning or of style. But the whole -scene of this voyage made so strong an impression on my mind, and is so -deeply fixed in my memory, that in committing it to paper I did not omit -one material circumstance; however, upon a strict review, I blotted out -several passages of less moment which were in my first copy, for fear -of being censured as tedious and trifling, whereof travelers are often, -perhaps not without justice, accused. - -[Illustration] - - - - -CHAPTER II - - A DESCRIPTION OF THE FARMER’S DAUGHTER—THE AUTHOR CARRIED TO A - MARKET TOWN, AND THEN TO THE METROPOLIS—THE PARTICULARS OF HIS - JOURNEY. - - -My mistress had a daughter of nine years old, a child of forward parts -for her age, very dexterous at her needle, and skillful in dressing her -baby. Her mother and she contrived to fit up the baby’s cradle for me -against night. The cradle was put into a small drawer of a cabinet, and -the drawer placed upon a hanging shelf for fear of the rats. This was my -bed all the time I stayed with those people, though made more convenient -by degrees, as I began to learn their language and make my wants known. -This young girl was so handy, that after I had once or twice pulled off -my clothes before her, she was able to dress and undress me, though I -never gave her that trouble when she would let me do either myself. She -made me seven shirts, and some other linen, of as fine cloth as could be -got, which indeed was coarser than sackcloth; and these she constantly -washed for me with her own hands. She was likewise my school-mistress, -to teach me the language; when I pointed to anything, she told me the -name of it in her own tongue, so that in a few days I was able to call -for whatever I had a mind to. She was very good-natured, and not above -forty feet high, being little for her age. She gave me the name of -Grildrig, which the family took up, and afterwards the whole kingdom. -The word imports what the Latins call _nanunculus_, the Italians -_homunceletino_, and the English _mannikin_. To her I chiefly owe my -preservation in that country; we never parted while I was there; I called -her my Glumdalclitch, or little nurse; and I should be guilty of great -ingratitude if I omitted this honorable mention of her care and affection -towards me, which I heartily wish it lay in my power to requite as she -deserves, instead of being the innocent but unhappy instrument of her -disgrace, as I have too much reason to fear. - -It now began to be known and talked of in the neighborhood, that my -master had found a strange animal in the field, about the bigness of a -_splacknuck_, but exactly shaped in every part like a human creature; -which it likewise imitated in all its actions; seemed to speak in a -little language of its own, had already learned several words of theirs, -went erect upon two legs, was tame and gentle, would come when it was -called, do whatever it was bid, had the finest limbs in the world, and a -complexion fairer than a nobleman’s daughter of three years old. Another -farmer, who lived hard by, and was a particular friend of my master, -came on a visit on purpose to inquire into the truth of this story. I -was immediately produced and placed upon a table, where I walked as I -was commanded, drew my hanger, put it up again, made my reverence to my -master’s guest, asked him in his own language how he did, and told him -he was welcome, just as my little nurse had instructed me. This man, who -was old and dim-sighted, put on his spectacles to behold me better; at -which I could not forbear laughing very heartily, for his eyes appeared -like the full moon shining into a chamber at two windows. Our people, -who discovered the cause of my mirth, bore me company in laughing, at -which the old fellow was fool enough to be angry and out of countenance. -He had the character of a great miser; and, to my misfortune, he well -deserved it by the cursed advice he gave my master to show me as a sight -upon a market day in the next town, which was half an hour’s riding, -about two-and-twenty miles from our house. I guessed there was some -mischief contriving, when I observed my master and his friend whispering -long together, sometimes pointing at me; and my fears made me fancy that -I overheard and understood some of their words. But the next morning -Glumdalclitch, my little nurse, told me the whole matter, which she had -cunningly picked out from her mother. The poor girl laid me on her bosom, -and fell a-weeping with shame and grief. She apprehended some mischief -would happen to me from rude vulgar folks, who might squeeze me to death -or break one of my limbs by taking me in their hands. She had also -observed how modest I was in my nature, how nicely I regarded my honor, -and what an indignity I should conceive it to be exposed for money as a -public spectacle to the meanest of the people. She said, her papa and -mamma had promised that Grildrig should be hers; but now she found they -meant to serve her as they did last year, when they pretended to give -her a lamb, and yet, as soon as it was fat, sold it to a butcher. For my -own part, I may truly affirm that I was less concerned than my nurse. I -had a strong hope which never left me, that I should one day recover my -liberty; and as to the ignominy of being carried about for a monster, -I considered myself to be a perfect stranger in the country, and that -such a misfortune could never be charged upon me as a reproach if ever I -should return to England; since the king of Great Britain himself, in my -condition, must have undergone the same distress. - -My master, pursuant to the advice of his friend, carried me in a box -the next market day to the neighboring town, and took along with him -his little daughter, my nurse, upon a pillion behind him. The box was -close on every side, with a little door for me to go in and out, and a -few gimlet holes to let in air. The girl had been so careful as to put -the quilt of her baby’s bed into it for me to lie down on. However, I -was terribly shaken and discomposed in this journey, though it were but -of half an hour; for the horse went about forty feet at every step, and -trotted so high, that the agitation was equal to the rising and falling -of a ship in a great storm, but much more frequent. Our journey was -somewhat further than from London to St. Albans. My master alighted -at an inn which he used to frequent; and after consulting awhile with -the innkeeper, and making some necessary preparations, he hired the -_grultrud_, or crier, to give notice through the town of a strange -creature to be seen at the sign of the Green Eagle, not so big as a -_splacknuck_ (an animal in that country very finely shaped, about six -feet long), and in every part of the body resembling a human creature, -could speak several words, and perform a hundred diverting tricks. - -I was placed upon a table in the largest room of the inn, which might -be near three hundred feet square. My little nurse stood on a low stool -close to the table, to take care of me, and direct what I should do. My -master, to avoid a crowd, would suffer only thirty people at a time to -see me. I walked about on the table as the girl commanded; she asked me -questions as far as she knew my understanding of the language reached, -and I answered them as loud as I could. I turned about several times -to the company, paid my humble respects, said they were welcome, and -used some other speeches I had been taught. I took up a thimble filled -with liquor, which Glumdalclitch had given me for a cup, and drank their -health. I drew out my hanger, and flourished with it after the manner of -fencers in England. My nurse gave me part of a straw, which I exercised -as a pike, having learned the art in my youth. I was that day shown -to twelve sets of company, and as often forced to go over again with -the same fopperies, till I was half dead with weariness and vexation; -for those who had seen me made such wonderful reports, that the people -were ready to break down the doors to come in. My master, for his own -interest, would not suffer any one to touch me except my nurse; and to -prevent danger, benches were set round the table at such a distance as -to put me out of everybody’s reach. However, an unlucky schoolboy aimed -a hazelnut directly at my head, which very narrowly missed me; otherwise -it came with so much violence that it would have infallibly knocked out -my brains, for it was almost as large as a small pumpkin; but I had the -satisfaction to see the young rogue well beaten, and turned out of the -room. - -My master gave public notice that he would show me again the next market -day; and in the meantime he prepared a more convenient vehicle for me, -which he had reason enough to do; for I was so tired with my first -journey, and with entertaining company for eight hours together, that I -could hardly stand upon my legs, or speak a word. It was at least three -days before I recovered my strength; and that I might have no rest at -home, all the neighboring gentlemen from a hundred miles round, hearing -of my fame, came to see me at my master’s own house. There could not -be fewer than thirty persons with their wives and children (for the -country is very populous); and my master demanded the rate of a full room -whenever he showed me at home, although it were only to a single family; -so that for some time I had but little ease every day of the week (except -Wednesday, which is their Sabbath), although I were not carried to the -town. - -My master, finding how profitable I was like to be, resolved to carry me -to the most considerable cities of the kingdom. Having therefore provided -himself with all things necessary for a long journey, and settled his -affairs at home, he took leave of his wife, and upon the 17th of August, -1703, about two months after my arrival, we set out for the metropolis, -situated near the middle of that empire, and about three thousand miles’ -distance from our house. My master made his daughter Glumdalclitch ride -behind him. She carried me on her lap in a box tied about her waist. The -girl had lined it on all sides with the softest cloth she could get, well -quilted underneath, furnished it with her baby’s bed, provided me with -linen and other necessaries, and made everything as convenient as she -could. We had no other company but a boy of the house, who rode after us -with the luggage. - -My master’s design was to show me in all the towns by the way, and to -step out of the road, for fifty or a hundred miles, to any village -or person of quality’s house where he might expect custom. We made -easy journeys, of not above seven or eight score miles a day; for -Glumdalclitch, on purpose to spare me, complained she was tired with the -trotting of the horse. She often took me out of my box at my own desire, -to give me air, and show me the country, but always held me fast by a -leading string. We passed over five or six rivers many degrees broader -and deeper than the Nile or the Ganges; and there was hardly a rivulet so -small as the Thames at London Bridge. We were ten weeks in our journey, -and I was shown in eighteen large towns, besides many villages and -private families. - -On the 26th day of October we arrived at the metropolis, called in their -language Lorbrulgrud, or Pride of the Universe. My master took a lodging -in the principal street of the city, not far from the royal palace, and -put out bills in the usual form, containing an exact description of my -person and parts. He hired a large room between three and four hundred -feet wide. He provided a table sixty feet in diameter, upon which I -was to act my part, and palisadoed round three feet from the edge, and -as many high, to prevent my falling over. I was shown ten times a day, -to the wonder and satisfaction of all people. I could now speak the -language tolerably well, and perfectly understood every word that was -spoken to me. Besides, I had learned their alphabet, and could make a -shift to explain a sentence here and there; for Glumdalclitch had been -my instructor while we were at home, and at leisure hours during our -journey. She carried a little book in her pocket, not much larger than -a Sanson’s Atlas; it was a common treatise for the use of young girls, -giving a short account of their religion; out of this she taught me my -letters, and interpreted the words. - - - - -CHAPTER III - - THE AUTHOR SENT FOR TO COURT—THE QUEEN BUYS HIM OF HIS MASTER, - THE FARMER, AND PRESENTS HIM TO THE KING—HE DISPUTES WITH HIS - MAJESTY’S GREAT SCHOLARS—AN APARTMENT AT COURT PROVIDED FOR THE - AUTHOR—HE IS IN HIGH FAVOR WITH THE QUEEN—HE STANDS UP FOR THE - HONOR OF HIS OWN COUNTRY—HIS QUARRELS WITH THE QUEEN’S DWARF. - - -The frequent labors I underwent every day made in a few weeks a very -considerable change in my health. The more my master got by me, the more -insatiable he grew. I had quite lost my stomach, and was almost reduced -to a skeleton. The farmer observed it, and concluding I must soon die, -resolved to make as good a hand of me as he could. While he was thus -reasoning and resolving with himself, a _slardral_, or gentleman usher, -came from court, commanding my master to carry me immediately thither for -the diversion of the queen and her ladies. Some of the latter had already -been to see me, and reported strange things of my beauty, behavior, and -good sense. Her majesty and those who attended her were beyond measure -delighted with my demeanor. I fell on my knees, and begged the honor of -kissing her imperial foot; but this gracious princess held out her little -finger towards me (after I was set on a table) which I embraced in both -my arms, and put the tip of it with the utmost respect to my lip. She -made me some general questions about my country and my travels, which I -answered as distinctly and in as few words as I could. She asked whether -I would be content to live at court. I bowed down to the board of the -table, and humbly answered that I was my master’s slave, but if I were -at my own disposal, I should be proud to devote my life to her majesty’s -service. She then asked my master whether he were willing to sell me at -a good price. He, who apprehended I could not live a month, was ready -enough to part with me, and demanded a thousand pieces of gold, which -were ordered him on the spot, each piece being about the bigness of eight -hundred moidores; but allowing for the proportion of all things between -that country and Europe, and the high price of gold among them, was -hardly so great a sum as a thousand guineas would be in England. I then -said to the queen, since I was now her majesty’s most humble creature and -vassal, I must beg the favor that Glumdalclitch, who had always tended me -with so much care and kindness, and understood to do it so well, might be -admitted into her service, and continue to be my nurse and instructor. -Her majesty agreed to my petition, and easily got the farmer’s consent, -who was glad enough to have his daughter preferred at court; and the -poor girl herself was not able to hide her joy. My late master withdrew, -bidding me farewell, and saying he had left me in a good service; to -which I replied not a word, only making him a slight bow. - -The queen observed my coldness, and, when the farmer was gone out of the -apartment, asked me the reason. I made bold to tell her majesty that I -owed no other obligation to my late master than his not dashing out the -brains of a poor harmless creature found by chance in his field, which -obligation was amply recompensed by the gain he had made in showing me -through half the kingdom, and the price he had now sold me for. That -the life I had since led was laborious enough to kill an animal of ten -times my strength. That my health was much impaired by the continual -drudgery of entertaining the rabble every hour of the day; and that -if my master had not thought my life in danger, her majesty, perhaps, -would not have got so cheap a bargain. But as I was out of all fear -of being ill treated, under the protection of so great and good an -empress, the ornament of nature, the darling of the world, the delight -of her subjects, the phœnix of the creation; so I hoped my late master’s -apprehensions would appear to be groundless, for I already found my -spirits to revive by the influence of her most august presence. - -This was the sum of my speech, delivered with great improprieties and -hesitation. The latter part was altogether framed in the style peculiar -to that people, whereof I learned some phrases from Glumdalclitch, while -she was carrying me to court. - -The queen, giving great allowance for my defectiveness in speaking, was, -however, surprised at so much wit and good sense in so diminutive an -animal. She took me in her own hand, and carried me to the king, who was -then retired to his cabinet. His majesty, a prince of much gravity and -austere countenance, not well observing my shape at first view, asked -the queen, after a cold manner, how long it was since she grew fond of a -_splacknuck_; for such it seems he took me to be, as I lay upon my breast -in her majesty’s right hand. But this princess, who has an infinite -deal of wit and humor, set me gently on my feet upon the scrutoire, and -commanded me to give his majesty an account of myself, which I did in a -very few words; and Glumdalclitch, who attended at the cabinet door, and -could not endure I should be out of her sight, being admitted, confirmed -all that had passed from my arrival at her father’s house. - -The king, although he be as learned a person as any in his dominions, -and had been educated in the study of philosophy, and particularly -mathematics; yet when he observed my shape exactly, and saw me walk -erect, before I began to speak conceived I might be a piece of clockwork -(which is in that country arrived to a very great perfection) contrived -by some ingenious artist. But when he heard my voice and found what -I delivered to be regular and rational, he could not conceal his -astonishment. He was by no means satisfied with the relation I gave him -of the manner I came into his kingdom, but thought it a story concerted -between Glumdalclitch and her father, who had taught me a set of words -to make me sell at a higher price. Upon this imagination he put several -other questions to me, and still received rational answers, no otherwise -defective than by a foreign accent, and an imperfect knowledge in the -language, with some rustic phrases which I had learned at the farmer’s -house, and did not suit the polite style of a court. - -His majesty sent for three great scholars who were then in their weekly -waiting, according to the custom of that country. These gentlemen, after -they had awhile examined my shape with much nicety, were of different -opinions concerning me. They all agreed that I could not be produced -according to the regular laws of nature, because I was not framed with -a capacity of preserving my life, either by swiftness, or climbing of -trees, or digging holes in the earth. They observed by my teeth, which -they viewed with great exactness, that I was a carnivorous animal; -yet most quadrupeds being an overmatch for me, and field mice, with -some others, too nimble, they could not imagine how I should be able -to support myself, unless I fed upon snails and other insects, which -they offered, by many learned arguments, to evince that I could not -possibly do. One of these virtuosi seemed to think that I might be an -embryo, or abortive birth. But this opinion was rejected by the other -two, who observed my limbs to be perfect and finished, and that I had -lived several years, as it was manifested from my beard, the stumps -whereof they plainly discovered through a magnifying glass. They would -not allow me to be a dwarf, because my littleness was beyond all degrees -of comparison; for the queen’s favorite dwarf, the smallest ever known -in that kingdom, was near thirty feet high. After much debate, they -concluded unanimously that I was only _relplum scalcath_, which is, -interpreted literally, _lusus naturæ_; a determination exactly agreeable -to the modern philosophy of Europe, whose professors, disdaining the old -evasion of occult causes, whereby the followers of Aristotle endeavor in -vain to disguise their ignorance, have invented this wonderful solution -of all difficulties, to the unspeakable advancement of human knowledge. - -After this decisive conclusion, I entreated to be heard a word or two. -I applied myself to the king, and assured his majesty that I came from -a country which abounded with several millions of both sexes, and of my -own stature; where the animals, trees, and houses were all in proportion, -and where, by consequence, I might be as able to defend myself, and -to find sustenance, as any of his majesty’s subjects could do here; -which I took for a full answer to those gentlemen’s arguments. To this -they only replied with a smile of contempt, saying that the farmer had -instructed me very well in my lesson. The king, who had a much better -understanding, dismissing his learned men, sent for the farmer, who -by good fortune was not yet gone out of town. Having therefore first -examined him privately, and then confronted him with me and the young -girl, his majesty began to think that what we told him might possibly -be true. He desired the queen to order that a particular care should be -taken of me; and was of opinion that Glumdalclitch should still continue -in her office of tending me, because he observed we had a great affection -for each other. A convenient apartment was provided for her at court; -she had a sort of governess appointed to take care of her education, a -maid to dress her, and two other servants for menial offices; but the -care of me was wholly appropriated to herself. The queen commanded her -own cabinetmaker to contrive a box that might serve me for a bedchamber, -after the model that Glumdalclitch and I should agree upon. This man was -a most ingenious artist, and according to my directions, in three weeks -finished for me a wooden chamber of sixteen feet square, and twelve high, -with sash windows, a door, and two closets, like a London bedchamber. The -board that made the ceiling was to be lifted up and down by two hinges, -to put in a bed ready furnished by her majesty’s upholsterer, which -Glumdalclitch took out every day to air, made it with her own hands, and -letting it down at night, locked up the roof over me. A nice workman, -who was famous for little curiosities, undertook to make me two chairs, -with backs and frames, of a substance not unlike ivory, and two tables, -with a cabinet to put my things in. The room was quilted on all sides, -as well as the floor and the ceiling, to prevent any accident from the -carelessness of those who carried me, and to break the force of a jolt -when I went in a coach. I desired a lock for my door, to prevent rats and -mice from coming in. The smith, after several attempts, made the smallest -that ever was seen among them, for I have known a larger at the gate -of a gentleman’s house in England. I made a shift to keep the key in a -pocket of my own, fearing Glumdalclitch might lose it. The queen likewise -ordered the thinnest silks that could be gotten, to make me clothes, -not much thicker than an English blanket, very cumbersome till I was -accustomed to them. They were after the fashion of the kingdom, partly -resembling the Persian, and partly the Chinese, and are a very grave -decent habit. - -The queen became so fond of my company that she could not dine without -me. I had a table placed upon the same at which her majesty ate, just at -her left elbow, and a chair to sit on. Glumdalclitch stood on a stool -on the floor, near my table, to assist and take care of me. I had an -entire set of silver dishes and plates, and other necessaries, which -in proportion to those of the queen, were not much bigger than what I -have seen of the same kind in a London toy-shop, for the furniture of a -baby-house; these my little nurse kept in her pocket in a silver box, -and gave me at meals as I wanted them, always cleaning them herself. -No person dined with the queen but the two princesses royal, the elder -sixteen years old, and the younger at that time thirteen and a month. Her -majesty used to put a bit of meat upon one of my dishes, out of which I -carved for myself; and her diversion was to see me eat in miniature; for -the queen (who had indeed but a weak stomach) took up at one mouthful as -much as a dozen English farmers could eat at a meal, which to me was for -some time a very nauseous sight. She would crunch the wing of a lark, -bones and all, between her teeth, although it were nine times as large -as that of a full-grown turkey; and put a bit of bread in her mouth, as -big as two twelve-penny loaves. She drank out of a golden cup, above a -hogshead at a draught. Her knives were twice as long as a scythe set -straight upon the handle; the spoons, forks, and other instruments were -all in the same proportion. I remember when Glumdalclitch carried me, out -of curiosity, to see some of the tables at court, where ten or a dozen of -these enormous knives and forks were lifted up together, I thought I had -never till then beheld so terrible a sight. - -It is the custom that every Wednesday (which, as I have observed, is -their Sabbath) the king and queen, with the royal issue of both sexes, -dine together in the apartment of his majesty, to whom I was now become -a great favorite; and at these times my little chair and table were -placed at his left hand before one of the salt-cellars. This prince took -a pleasure in conversing with me, inquiring into the manners, religion, -laws, government, and learning of Europe, wherein I gave him the best -account I was able. His apprehension was so clear and his judgment so -exact that he made very wise reflections and observations upon all I -said. But I confess that after I had been a little too copious in talking -of my own beloved country, of our trade and wars by sea and land, of our -schisms in religion, and parties in the state, the prejudices of his -education prevailed so far that he could not forbear taking me up in his -right hand and stroking me gently with the other, after a hearty fit of -laughing, asked me whether I were a Whig or a Tory. Then turning to his -first minister, who waited behind him with a white staff, near as tall as -the mainmast of the Royal Sovereign, he observed how contemptible a thing -was human grandeur, which could be mimicked by such diminutive insects as -I. “And yet,” said he, “I dare engage these creatures have their titles -and distinctions of honor; they contrive little nests and burrows, that -they call houses and cities; they make a figure in dress and equipage; -they love, they fight, they dispute, they cheat, they betray.” And -thus he continued on, while my color came and went several times with -indignation to hear our noble country, the mistress of arts and arms, the -scourge of France, the arbitress of Europe, the seat of virtue, piety, -honor, and truth, the pride and envy of the world, so contemptuously -treated. - -But as I was not in a condition to resent injuries, so upon mature -thoughts I began to doubt whether I were injured or no. For, after -having been accustomed several months to the sight and converse of this -people, and observed every object upon which I cast my eyes to be of -proportionable magnitude, the horror I had at first conceived from their -bulk and aspect was so far worn off that if I had then beheld a company -of English lords and ladies in their finery and birthday clothes, acting -their several parts in the most courtly manner of strutting, and bowing, -and prating, to say the truth, I should have been strongly tempted to -laugh as much at them as the king and his grandees did at me. Neither, -indeed, could I forbear smiling at myself when the queen used to place -me upon her hand towards a looking-glass, by which both our persons -appeared before me in full view together; and there could nothing be more -ridiculous than the comparison; so that I really began to imagine myself -dwindled many degrees below my usual size. - -Nothing angered and mortified me so much as the queen’s dwarf, who, -being of the lowest stature that was ever in that country (for I verily -think he was not full thirty feet high), became so insolent at seeing -a creature so much beneath him, that he would always affect to swagger -and look big as he passed by me in the queen’s antechamber, while I was -standing on some table talking with the lords or ladies of the court, -and he seldom failed of a small word or two upon my littleness; against -which I could only revenge myself by calling him brother, challenging -him to wrestle, and such repartees as are usual in the mouths of court -pages. One day at dinner, this malicious little cub was so nettled with -something I had said to him, that, raising himself upon the frame of her -majesty’s chair, he took me up by the middle, as I was sitting down, not -thinking any harm, and let me drop into a large silver bowl of cream, -and then ran away as fast as he could. I fell over head and ears, and -if I had not been a good swimmer it might have gone very hard with me; -for Glumdalclitch in that instant happened to be at the other end of the -room, and the queen was in such a fright that she wanted presence of mind -to assist me. But my little nurse ran to my relief, and took me out, -after I had swallowed above a quart of cream. I was put to bed; however, -I received no other damage than the loss of a suit of clothes, which -was utterly spoiled. The dwarf was soundly whipped, and as a further -punishment, forced to drink up the bowl of cream into which he had thrown -me. Neither was he ever restored to favor; for soon after the queen -bestowed him on a lady of high quality, so that I saw him no more, to my -very great satisfaction: for I could not tell to what extremity such a -malicious urchin might have carried his resentment. - -He had before served me a scurvy trick, which set the queen a-laughing, -although at the same time she were heartily vexed, and would have -immediately cashiered him, if I had not been so generous as to intercede. -Her majesty had taken a marrowbone upon her plate, and, after knocking -out the marrow, placed the bone again on the dish erect, as it stood -before; the dwarf, watching his opportunity, while Glumdalclitch was gone -to the sideboard, mounted upon the stool she stood on to take care of -me at meals, took me up in both hands, and squeezing my legs together, -wedged them into the marrowbone above my waist, where I stuck for some -time, and made a very ridiculous figure. I believe it was near a minute -before any one knew what was become of me, for I thought it below me to -cry out. But, as princes seldom get their meat hot, my legs were not -scalded, only my stockings and breeches in a sad condition. The dwarf, at -my entreaty, had no other punishment than a sound whipping. - -I was frequently rallied by the queen upon account of my fearfulness; and -she used to ask me whether the people of my country were as great cowards -as myself! The occasion was this: The kingdom is much pestered with flies -in summer; and these odious insects, each of them as big as a Dunstable -lark, hardly gave me any rest while I sat at dinner, with their continual -humming and buzzing about my ears. They would sometimes alight upon my -victuals. Sometimes they would fix upon my nose or forehead, where they -stung me to the quick, smelling very offensively; and I could easily -trace that viscous matter which, our naturalists tell us, enables those -creatures to walk with their feet upwards upon a ceiling. I had much ado -to defend myself against these detestable animals, and could not forbear -starting when they came on my face. It was the common practice of the -dwarf to catch a number of these insects in his hand, as schoolboys do -among us, and let them out suddenly under my nose, on purpose to frighten -me, and divert the queen. My remedy was to cut them in pieces with my -knife as they flew in the air, wherein my dexterity was much admired. - -I remember one morning when Glumdalclitch had set me in my box upon a -window, as she usually did in fair days to give me air (for I durst not -venture to let the box be hung on a nail out of the window, as we do -with cages in England), after I had lifted up one of my sashes, and sat -down at my table to eat a piece of sweet cake for my breakfast, above -twenty wasps, allured by the smell, came flying into the room, humming -louder than the drones of as many bagpipes. Some of them seized my cake -and carried it piecemeal away; others flew about my head and face, -confounding me with the noise, and putting me in the utmost terror of -their stings. However, I had the courage to rise and draw my hanger, -and attack them in the air. I dispatched four of them, but the rest got -away, and I presently shut my window. These creatures were as large as -partridges; I took out their stings, found them an inch and a half long, -and as sharp as needles. I carefully preserved them all; and having since -shown them, with some other curiosities, in several parts of Europe, upon -my return to England I gave three of them to Gresham College and kept the -fourth for myself. - - - - -CHAPTER IV - - THE COUNTRY DESCRIBED—A PROPOSAL FOR CORRECTING MODERN MAPS—THE - KING’S PALACE, AND SOME ACCOUNT OF THE METROPOLIS—THE AUTHOR’S - WAY OF TRAVELING—THE CHIEF TEMPLE DESCRIBED. - - -I now intend to give the reader a short description of this country, as -far as I traveled in it, which was not above two thousand miles round -Lorbrulgrud, the metropolis. For the queen, whom I always attended, -never went further when she accompanied the king in his progresses, and -there stayed till his majesty returned from viewing his frontiers. The -whole extent of this prince’s dominions reaching about six thousand -miles in length, and from three to five in breadth; from whence I cannot -but conclude that our geographers of Europe are in a great error, by -supposing nothing but sea between Japan and California; for it was ever -my opinion that there must be a balance of earth to counterpoise the -great continent of Tartary; and therefore they ought to correct their -maps and charts by joining this vast tract of land to the northwest parts -of America, wherein I shall be ready to lend them my assistance. - -The kingdom is a peninsula, terminated to the northeast by a ridge of -mountains thirty miles high, which are altogether impassable, by reason -of the volcanoes upon the tops; neither do the most learned know what -sort of mortals inhabit beyond those mountains, or whether they be -inhabited at all. On the three other sides, it is bounded by the ocean. -There is not one seaport in the whole kingdom; and those parts of the -coasts into which the rivers issue, are so full of pointed rocks, and the -sea generally so rough, that there is no venturing with the smallest of -their boats; so that these people are wholly excluded from any commerce -with the rest of the world. But the large rivers are full of vessels, and -abound with excellent fish; for they seldom get any from the sea, because -the sea fish are of the same size with those in Europe, and consequently -not worth catching; whereby it is manifest, that nature, in the -production of plants and animals of so extraordinary a bulk, is wholly -confined to this continent, of which I leave the reasons to be determined -by philosophers. However, now and then they take a whale that happens to -be dashed against the rocks, which the common people feed on heartily. -These whales I have known so large, that a man could hardly carry one -upon his shoulders; and sometimes, for curiosity, they are brought in -hampers to Lorbrulgrud; I saw one of them in a dish at the king’s table, -which passed for a rarity, but I did not observe he was fond of it; for -I think, indeed, the bigness disgusted him, although I have seen one -somewhat larger in Greenland. - -The country is well inhabited, for it contains fifty-one cities, near -a hundred walled towns, and a great number of villages. To satisfy my -curious reader, it may be sufficient to describe Lorbrulgrud. This city -stands upon almost two equal parts on each side of the river that passes -through. It contains above eighty thousand houses, and about six hundred -thousand inhabitants. It is in length three _glongluns_ (which make about -fifty-four English miles), and two and a half in breadth, as I measured -it myself in the royal map made by the king’s order, which was laid on -the ground on purpose for me, and extended a hundred feet; I paced the -diameter and circumference several times barefoot, and computing by the -scale, measured it pretty exactly. - -The king’s palace is no regular edifice, but a heap of buildings about -seven miles round; the chief rooms are generally two hundred and forty -feet high, and broad and long in proportion. A coach was allowed to -Glumdalclitch and me, wherein her governess frequently took her out to -see the town, or go among the shops; and I was always of the party, -carried in my box; although the girl, at my own desire, would often take -me out, and hold me in her hand, that I might more conveniently view -the houses and the people, as we passed along the streets. I reckoned -our coach to be about a square of Westminster Hall, but not altogether -so high; however, I cannot be very exact. One day the governess ordered -our coachman to stop at several shops, where the beggars, watching their -opportunity, crowded to the sides of the coach, and gave me the most -horrible spectacles that ever an English eye beheld. - -Beside the large box in which I was usually carried, the queen ordered -a smaller one to be made for me, of about twelve feet square, and ten -high, for the convenience of traveling; because the other was somewhat -too large for Glumdalclitch’s lap, and cumbersome in the coach; it was -made by the same artist, whom I directed in the whole contrivance. This -traveling closet was an exact square, with a window in the middle of -three of the squares, and each window was latticed with iron wire on the -outside, to prevent accidents in long journeys. On the fourth side, which -had no window, two strong staples were fixed, through which the person -that carried me, when I had a mind to be on horseback, put in a leather -belt, and buckled it about his waist. This was always the office of some -grave trusty servant in whom I could confide, whether I attended the king -and queen in their progresses, or were disposed to see the gardens, or -pay a visit to some great lady or minister of state in the court, when -Glumdalclitch happened to be out of order; for I soon began to be known -and esteemed among the greatest officers, I suppose more upon account -of their majesties’ favor than any merit of my own. In journeys, when I -was weary of the coach, a servant on horseback would buckle my box, and -place it on a cushion before him; and there I had a full prospect of the -country on three sides from my three windows. I had in this closet a -field bed, and a hammock hung from the ceiling, two chairs and a table, -neatly screwed to the floor, to prevent being tossed by the agitation of -the horse or the coach. And having long been used to sea voyages, those -motions, although sometimes very violent, did not much discompose me. - -Whenever I had a mind to see the town, it was always in my traveling -closet, which Glumdalclitch held in her lap in a kind of open sedan, -after the fashion of the country, borne by four men, and attended by two -others in the queen’s livery. The people, who had often heard of me, -were very curious to crowd about the sedan, and the girl was complaisant -enough to make the bearers stop, and to take me in her hand that I might -be more conveniently seen. - -I was very desirous to see the chief temple, and particularly the -tower belonging to it, which is reckoned the highest in the kingdom. -Accordingly, one day my nurse carried me thither, but I may truly say -I came back disappointed; for the height is not above three thousand -feet, and reckoning from the ground to the highest pinnacle top; which, -allowing for the difference between the size of those people and us in -Europe, is no great matter for admiration, nor at all equal in proportion -(if I rightly remember) to Salisbury steeple. But, not to detract from -a nation to which, during my life, I shall acknowledge myself extremely -obliged, it must be allowed that whatever this famous tower wants in -height, is amply made up in beauty and strength; for the walls are near a -hundred feet thick, built of hewn stone, whereof each is about forty feet -square, and adorned on all sides with statues of gods and emperors cut in -marble larger than the life, placed in their several niches. I measured -a little finger which had fallen down from one of these statues, and -lay unperceived among some rubbish, and found it exactly four feet and -an inch in length. Glumdalclitch wrapped it up in her handkerchief, and -carried it home in her pocket, to keep among other trinkets, of which the -girl was very fond, as children at her age usually are. - -The king’s kitchen is indeed a noble building, vaulted at top, and about -six hundred feet high. The great oven is not so wide by ten paces as the -cupola at St. Paul’s; for I measured the latter on purpose, after my -return. But if I should describe the kitchen grate, the prodigious pots -and kettles, the joints of meat turning on the spits, with many other -particulars, perhaps I should be hardly believed; at least a severe -critic would be apt to think I enlarged a little, as travelers are often -suspected to do. To avoid which censure, I fear I have run too much -into the other extreme, and that if this treatise should happen to be -translated into the language of Brobdingnag (which is the general name -of that kingdom), and transmitted thither, the king and his people would -have reason to complain that I had done them an injury by a false and -diminutive representation. - -His majesty seldom keeps above six hundred horses in his stables; they -are generally from fifty-four to sixty feet high. But when he goes abroad -on solemn days, he is attended, for state, by a militia guard of five -hundred horse, which indeed I thought was the most splendid sight that -could be ever beheld, till I saw part of his army in battalia, whereof I -shall find another occasion to speak. - - - - -CHAPTER V - - SEVERAL ADVENTURES THAT HAPPENED TO THE AUTHOR—THE EXECUTION OF - A CRIMINAL—THE AUTHOR SHOWS HIS SKILL IN NAVIGATION. - - -I should have lived happy enough in that country, if my littleness had -not exposed me to several ridiculous and troublesome accidents; some of -which I shall venture to relate. Glumdalclitch often carried me into the -gardens of the court in my smaller box, and would sometimes take me out -of it and hold me in her hand, or set me down to walk. I remember, before -the dwarf left the queen, he followed us one day into those gardens, and -my nurse having set me down, he and I being close together, near some -dwarf apple trees, I must need show my wit by a silly allusion between -him and the trees, which happens to hold in their language as it does -in ours. Whereupon, the malicious rogue, watching his opportunity, when -I was walking under one of them, shook it directly over my head, by -which a dozen apples, each of them near as large as a Bristol barrel, -came tumbling about my ears; one of them hit me on the back as I chanced -to stoop, and knocked me down flat on my face; but I received no other -hurt, and the dwarf was pardoned at my desire, because I had given the -provocation. - -Another day, Glumdalclitch left me on a smooth grassplot to divert -myself, while she walked at some distance with her governess. In the -meantime, there suddenly fell such a violent shower of hail, that I was -immediately, by the force of it, struck to the ground; and when I was -down, the hailstones gave me such cruel bangs all over the body, as if -I had been pelted with tennis balls; however, I made a shift to creep on -all fours, and shelter myself by lying flat on my face on the lee side of -a border of lemon-thyme; but so bruised from head to foot that I could -not go abroad in ten days. Neither is this at all to be wondered at, -because nature in that country observing the same proportion through all -her operations, a hailstone is near eighteen hundred times as large as -one in Europe; which I can assert upon experience, having been so curious -to weigh and measure them. - -But a more dangerous accident happened to me in the same garden, when my -little nurse, believing she had put me in a secure place (which I often -entreated her to do, that I might enjoy my own thoughts), and having left -my box at home to avoid the trouble of carrying it, went to another part -of the garden with her governess and some ladies of her acquaintance. -While she was absent, and out of hearing, a small white spaniel belonging -to one of the chief gardeners, having got by accident into the garden, -happened to range near the place where I lay: the dog following the -scent, came directly up, and taking me in his mouth, ran straight to -his master, wagging his tail, and set me gently on the ground. By good -fortune he had been so well taught, that I was carried between his -teeth without the least hurt, or even tearing my clothes. But the poor -gardener, who knew me well, and had a great kindness for me, was in a -terrible fright; he gently took me up in both his hands, and asked me -how I did; but I was so amazed and out of breath, that I could not speak -a word. In a few minutes I came to myself, and he carried me safe to my -little nurse, who by this time had returned to the place where she had -left me, and was in cruel agonies when I did not appear, nor answer when -she called. She severely reprimanded the gardener on account of his dog. -But the thing was hushed up, and never known at court, for the girl was -afraid of the queen’s anger; and truly, as to myself, I thought it would -not be for my reputation that such a story should go about. - -This accident absolutely determined Glumdalclitch never to trust me -abroad for the future out of her sight. I had been long afraid of -this resolution, and therefore concealed from her some little unlucky -adventures that happened in those times when I was left by myself. Once -a kite, hovering over the garden, made a stoop at me, and if I had not -resolutely drawn my hanger, and run under a thick espalier, he would have -certainly carried me away in his talons. Another time, walking to the top -of a fresh molehill, I fell to my neck in the hole through which that -animal had cast up the earth, and coined some lie, not worth remembering, -to excuse myself for spoiling my clothes. I likewise broke my right shin -against the shell of a snail, which I happened to stumble over as I was -walking alone and thinking on poor England. - -[Illustration: “_I banged it a good while with one of my sculls_” - -_Page 132_] - -I cannot tell whether I were more pleased or mortified to observe, in -those solitary walks, that the smaller birds did not appear to be at all -afraid of me, but would hop about within a yard’s distance, looking for -worms and other food, with as much indifference and security as if no -creature at all were near them. I remember, a thrush had the confidence -to snatch out of my hand with his bill a piece of cake that Glumdalclitch -had just given me for my breakfast. When I attempted to catch any of -these birds, they would boldly turn against me, endeavoring to pick my -fingers, which I durst not venture within their reach; and then they -would hop back unconcerned, to hunt for worms or snails as they did -before. But one day, I took a thick cudgel, and threw it with all my -strength so luckily at a linnet, that I knocked him down, and seizing -him by the neck with both my hands, ran with him in triumph to my nurse. -However, the bird, who had only been stunned, recovering himself, gave me -so many boxes with his wings on both sides of my head and body, though -I held him at arm’s length, and was out of the reach of his claws, that -I was twenty times thinking to let him go. But I was soon relieved by -one of our servants, who wrung off the bird’s neck, and I had him next -day for dinner, by the queen’s command. This linnet, as near as I can -remember, seemed to be somewhat larger than an English swan. - -One day a young gentleman who was nephew to my nurse’s governess, came -and pressed them both to see an execution. It was of a man who had -murdered one of that gentleman’s intimate acquaintance. Glumdalclitch was -prevailed on to be of the company, very much against her inclination, for -she was naturally tender-hearted; and as for myself, although I abhorred -such kind of spectacles, yet my curiosity tempted me to see something -that I thought must be extraordinary. The malefactor was fixed in a chair -upon a scaffold erected for the purpose, and his head cut off at a blow -with a sword of about forty feet long. The veins and arteries spouted up -such a prodigious quantity of blood, and so high in the air, that the -great _jet d’eau_ at Versailles was not equal for the time it lasted; -and the head, when it fell on the scaffold floor, gave such a bounce as -made me start, although I were at least half an English mile distant. - -The queen, who often used to hear me talk of my sea voyages, and took -all occasions to divert me when I was melancholy, asked me whether I -understood how to handle a sail or an oar, and whether a little exercise -of rowing might not be convenient for my health. I answered that I -understood both very well; for although my proper employment had been to -be surgeon or doctor to the ship, yet often, upon a pinch, I was forced -to work like a common mariner. But I could not see how this could be done -in their country, where the smallest wherry was equal to a first-rate man -of war among us; and such a boat as I could manage would never live in -any of their rivers. Her majesty said, if I would contrive a boat, her -own joiner should make it, and she would provide a place for me to sail -in. The fellow was an ingenious workman, and by my instructions, in ten -days finished a pleasure boat, with all its tackling, able conveniently -to hold eight Europeans. When it was finished, the queen was so delighted -that she ran with it in her lap to the king, who ordered it to be put in -a cistern full of water, with me in it, by way of trial, where I could -not manage my two sculls or little oars for want of room. But the queen -had before contrived another project. She ordered the joiner to make a -wooden trough of three hundred feet long, fifty broad, and eight deep; -which being well pitched to prevent leaking, was placed on the floor -along the wall, in an outer room of the palace. It had a cock near the -bottom to let out the water when it began to grow stale; and two servants -could easily fill it in half an hour. Here I often used to row for my -own diversion, as well as that of the queen and her ladies, who thought -themselves well entertained with my skill and agility. Sometimes I would -put up my sail, and then my business was only to steer, while the ladies -gave me a gale with their fans; and when they were weary, some of the -pages would blow my sail forward with their breath, while I showed my -art by steering starboard or larboard as I pleased. When I had done, -Glumdalclitch always carried back my boat into her closet, and hung it on -a nail to dry. - -In this exercise I once met an accident which had like to have cost me -my life; for, one of the pages having put my boat into the trough, the -governess who attended Glumdalclitch very officiously lifted me up, to -place me in the boat; but I happened to slip through her fingers, and -should have infallibly fallen down forty feet, upon the floor, if by the -luckiest chance in the world I had not been stopped by a corking-pin that -stuck in the good gentlewoman’s stomacher; the head of the pin passed -between my shirt and the waistband of my breeches, and thus I was held by -the middle in the air till Glumdalclitch ran to my relief. - -Another time, one of the servants, whose office it was to fill my trough -every third day with fresh water, was so careless to let a huge frog (not -perceiving it) slip out of his pail. The frog lay concealed till I was -put into my boat, but then, seeing a resting place, climbed up, and made -it lean so much on one side, that I was forced to balance it with all my -weight on the other, to prevent overturning. When the frog was got in, -it hopped at once half the length of the boat, and then over my head, -backwards and forwards, daubing my face and clothes with its odious -slime. The largeness of its features made it appear the most deformed -animal that can be conceived. However, I desired Glumdalclitch to let me -deal with it alone. I banged it a good while with one of my sculls, and -at last forced it to leap out of the boat. - -But the greatest danger I ever underwent in that kingdom was from a -monkey, who belonged to one of the clerks of the kitchen. Glumdalclitch -had locked me up in her closet, while she went somewhere upon business, -or a visit. The weather being very warm, the closet window was left -open, as well as the windows and door of my bigger box, in which I -usually lived, because of its largeness and conveniency. As I sat quietly -meditating at my table, I heard something bounce in at the closet window, -and skip about from one side to the other; whereat, although I was much -alarmed, yet I ventured to look out, but stirred not from my seat; and -then I saw this frolicsome animal frisking and leaping up and down, till -at last he came to my box, which he seemed to view with great pleasure -and curiosity, peeping in at the door and every window. I retreated to -the farther corner of my room, or box; but the monkey, looking in at -every side, put me into such a fright, that I wanted presence of mind to -conceal myself under the bed, as I might easily have done. After some -time spent in peeping, grinning, and chattering, he at last espied me; -and reaching one of his paws in at the door, as a cat does when she plays -with a mouse, although I often shifted place to avoid him, he at length -seized the lappet of my coat (which being made of that country cloth, was -very thick and strong) and dragged me out. He took me up in his right -forefoot, and held me as a nurse does a child she is going to suckle, -just as I have seen the same sort of creature do with a kitten in Europe; -and when I offered to struggle, he squeezed me so hard, that I thought -it more prudent to submit. I have good reason to believe that he took me -for a young one of his own species, by his often stroking my face very -gently with his other paw. In these diversions he was interrupted by a -noise at the closet door, as if somebody were opening it; whereupon he -suddenly leaped up to the window at which he had come in, and thence upon -the leads and gutters, walking upon three legs, and holding me in the -fourth, till he clambered up to a roof that was next to ours. I heard -Glumdalclitch give a shriek at the moment he was carrying me out. The -poor girl was almost distracted; that quarter of the palace was all in an -uproar; the servants ran for ladders; the monkey was seen by hundreds in -the court, sitting upon the ridge of a building, holding me like a baby -in one of his forepaws, and feeding me with the other, by cramming into -my mouth some victuals he had squeezed out of the bag on one side of his -chaps, and patting me when I would not eat; whereat many of the rabble -below could not forbear laughing; neither do I think they justly ought -to be blamed, for, without question, the sight was ridiculous enough to -everybody but myself. Some of the people threw up stones, hoping to drive -the monkey down; but this was strictly forbidden, or else very probably -my brains had been dashed out. - -The ladders were now applied, and mounted by several men: which the -monkey observing, and finding himself almost encompassed, not being able -to make speed enough with his three legs, let me drop on a ridge tile, -and made his escape. Here I sat for some time, three hundred yards from -the ground, expecting every moment to be blown down by the wind, or to -fall by my own giddiness, and come tumbling over and over from the ridge -to the eaves; but an honest lad, one of my nurse’s footmen, climbed up, -and putting me into his breeches pocket, brought me down safe. - -I was almost choked with the filthy stuff the monkey had crammed down my -throat; but my dear little nurse picked it out of my mouth with a small -needle, and then I fell a-vomiting, which gave me great relief. Yet I -was so weak and bruised in the sides with the squeezes given me by this -odious animal, that I was forced to keep my bed a fortnight. The king, -queen, and all the court sent every day to inquire after my health; and -her majesty made me several visits during my sickness. The monkey was -killed, and an order made that no such animal should be kept about the -palace. - -When I attended the king after my recovery, to return him thanks for -his favors, he was pleased to rally me a good deal upon this adventure. -He asked me what my thoughts and speculations were while I lay in the -monkey’s paw, how I liked the victuals he gave me, his manner of feeding, -and whether the fresh air on the roof had sharpened my stomach. He -desired to know what I would have done upon such an occasion in my own -country. I told his majesty, that in Europe we had no monkeys except such -as were brought for curiosities from other places, and so small that I -could deal with a dozen of them together, if they presumed to attack -me. And as for that monstrous animal with whom I was so lately engaged -(it was indeed as large as an elephant), if my fears had suffered me to -think so far as to make use of my hanger (looking fiercely and clapping -my hand upon the hilt as I spoke) when he poked his paw into my chamber, -perhaps I should have given him such a wound as would have made him glad -to withdraw it with more haste than he put it in. This I delivered in -a firm tone, like a person who was jealous lest his courage should be -called in question. However, my speech produced nothing else besides a -loud laughter, which all the respect due to his majesty from those about -him could not make them contain. This made me reflect how vain an attempt -it is for a man to endeavor doing himself honor among those who are out -of all degree of equality or comparison with him. And yet I have seen -the moral of my own behavior very frequently in England since my return; -where a little contemptible varlet, without the least title to birth, -person, wit, or common sense, shall presume to look with importance, and -put himself upon a foot with the greatest persons of the kingdom. - - - - -CHAPTER VI - - SEVERAL CONTRIVANCES OF THE AUTHOR TO PLEASE THE KING AND - QUEEN—HE SHOWS HIS SKILL IN MUSIC—THE KING INQUIRES INTO THE - STATE OF EUROPE, WHICH THE AUTHOR RELATES TO HIM—THE KING’S - OBSERVATIONS THEREON. - - -I used to attend the king’s levee once or twice a week, and had often -seen him under the barber’s hand, which indeed was at first very terrible -to behold; for the razor was almost twice as long as an ordinary scythe. -His majesty, according to the custom of the country, was only shaved -twice a week. I once prevailed on the barber to give me some of the suds -or lather, out of which I picked forty or fifty of the strongest stumps -of hair. I then took a piece of fine wood, and cut it like the back of a -comb, making several holes in it at equal distance with as small a needle -as I could get from Glumdalclitch. I fixed in the stumps so artificially, -scraping and sloping them with my knife towards the points, that I made a -very tolerable comb; which was a seasonable supply, my own being so much -broken in the teeth that it was almost useless: neither did I know any -artist in that country so nice and exact, as would undertake to make me -another. - -And this puts me in mind of an amusement wherein I spent many of my -leisure hours. I desired the queen’s woman to save for me the combings of -her majesty’s hair, whereof in time I got a good quantity; and consulting -with my friend the cabinetmaker, who had received general orders to do -little jobs for me, I directed him to make two chair frames, no larger -than those I had in my box, and to bore little holes with a fine awl -round those parts where I designed the backs and seats; through these -holes I wove the strongest hairs I could pick out, just after the manner -of cane chairs in England. When they were finished, I made a present -of them to her majesty, who kept them in her cabinet, and used to show -them for curiosities, as indeed they were the wonder of every one that -beheld them. The queen would have me sit upon one of these chairs, -but I absolutely refused to obey her, protesting I would rather die -a thousand deaths than place part of my body on those precious hairs -that once adorned her majesty’s head. Of these hairs (as I had always a -mechanical genius) I likewise made a neat little purse about five feet -long, with her majesty’s name deciphered in gold letters, which I gave -to Glumdalclitch by the queen’s consent. To say the truth, it was more -for show than use, being not of strength to bear the weight of the larger -coins, and therefore she kept nothing in it but some little toys that -girls are fond of. - -The king, who delighted in music, had frequent concerts at court, to -which I was sometimes carried, and set in my box on a table to hear them; -but the noise was so great that I could hardly distinguish the tunes. I -am confident that all the drums and trumpets of a royal army, beating and -sounding together just at your ears, could not equal it. My practice was -to have my box removed from the places where the performers sat, as far -as I could, then to shut the doors and windows of it, and draw the window -curtains, after which I found their music not disagreeable. - -I had learned in my youth to play a little upon the spinet. Glumdalclitch -kept one in her chamber, and a master attended twice a week to teach -her. I call it a spinet, because it somewhat resembled that instrument, -and was played upon in the same manner. A fancy came into my head that -I would entertain the king and queen with an English tune upon this -instrument. But this appeared extremely difficult; for the spinet was -near sixty feet long, each key being almost a foot wide, so that with my -arms extended I could not reach to above five keys, and to press them -down required a good smart stroke with my fist, which would be too great -a labor and to no purpose. The method I contrived was this: I prepared -two round sticks about the bigness of common cudgels; they were thicker -at one end than the other, and I covered the thicker ends with a piece -of a mouse’s skin, that by rapping on them I might neither damage the -tops of the keys nor interrupt the sound. Before the spinet a bench was -placed, about four feet below the keys, and I was put upon the bench. I -ran sideling upon it, that way and this, as fast as I could, banging the -proper keys with my two sticks, and made a shift to play a jig, to the -great satisfaction of both their majesties; but it was the most violent -exercise I ever underwent; and yet I could not strike above sixteen keys, -nor, consequently, play the bass and treble together, as other artists -do; which was a great disadvantage to my performance. - -The king, who, as I before observed, was a prince of excellent -understanding, would frequently order that I should be brought in my -box, and set upon the table in his closet. He would then command me to -bring one of my chairs out of the box, and sit down within three yards’ -distance upon the top of the cabinet, which brought me almost to a level -with his face. In this manner I had several conversations with him. I one -day took the freedom to tell his majesty that the contempt he discovered -towards Europe, and the rest of the world, did not seem answerable to -those excellent qualities of mind he was master of; that reason did not -extend itself with the bulk of the body; on the contrary, we observed -in our country that the tallest persons were usually least provided -with it; that among other animals, bees and ants had the reputation of -more industry, art, and sagacity than many of the larger kinds; and -that, as inconsiderable as he took me to be, I hoped I might live to do -his majesty some signal service. The king heard me with attention, and -began to conceive a much better opinion of me than he had ever before. -He desired I would give him as exact an account of the government of -England as I possibly could; because, as fond as princes commonly are of -their own customs (for so he conjectured of other monarchs by my former -discourses), he should be glad to hear of anything that might deserve -imitation. - -Imagine with thyself, courteous reader, how often I then wished for the -tongue of Demosthenes or Cicero, that might have enabled me to celebrate -the praises of my own dear native country in a style equal to its merits -and felicity. - -I began my discourse by informing his majesty that our dominions -consisted of two islands, which composed three mighty kingdoms under one -sovereign, besides our plantations in America. I dwelt long upon the -fertility of our soil, and the temperature of our climate. I then spoke -at large upon the constitution of an English Parliament, partly made up -of an illustrious body called the House of Peers, persons of the noblest -blood, and of the most ancient and ample patrimonies. I described that -extraordinary care always taken of their education in arts and arms, -to qualify them for being counselors born to the king and kingdom, to -have a share in the legislature; to be members of the highest court of -judicature, from whence there could be no appeal; and to be champions -always ready for the defense of their prince and country, by their -valor, conduct, and fidelity. That these were the ornament and bulwark -of the kingdom, worthy followers of their most renowned ancestors, whose -honor had been the reward of their virtue, from which their posterity -were never once known to degenerate. To these were joined several holy -persons, as part of that assembly, under the title of bishops, whose -peculiar business it is to take care of religion, and of those who -instruct the people therein. These were searched and sought out through -the whole nation, by the prince and his wisest counselors, among such -of the priesthood as were most deservedly distinguished by the sanctity -of their lives, and the depth of their erudition; who were indeed the -spiritual fathers of the clergy and the people. - -That the other part of the Parliament consisted of an assembly called -the House of Commons, who were all principal gentlemen, freely picked -and culled out by the people themselves, for their great abilities and -love of their country, to represent the wisdom of the whole nation. And -these two bodies make up the most august assembly in Europe, to whom, in -conjunction with the prince, the whole legislature is committed. - -I then descended to the courts of justice, over which the judges, those -venerable sages and interpreters of the law, presided, for determining -the disputed rights and properties of men, as well as for the punishment -of vice and protection of innocence. I mentioned the prudent management -of our treasury; the valor and achievements of our forces by sea and -land. I computed the number of our people, by reckoning how many millions -there might be of each religious sect or political party among us. I did -not omit even our sports and pastimes, or any other particular which I -thought might redound to the honor of my country. And I finished all with -a brief historical account of affairs and events in England for about a -hundred years past. - -This conversation was not ended under five audiences, each of several -hours; and the king heard the whole with great attention, frequently -taking notes of what I spoke, as well as memorandums of several questions -he intended to ask me. - -When I had put an end to these long discourses, his majesty in a sixth -audience consulting his notes, proposed many doubts, queries, and -objections, upon every article. He asked what methods were used to -cultivate the minds and bodies of our young nobility, and in what kind -of business they commonly spent the first and teachable part of their -lives. What course was taken to supply that assembly when any noble -family became extinct. What qualifications were necessary in those who -were to be created new lords. Whether the humor of the prince, a sum of -money to a court lady or a Prime Minister, or a design of strengthening -a party opposite to the public interest, ever happened to be motives in -those advancements. What share of knowledge these lords had in the laws -of their country, and how they came by it, so as to enable them to decide -the properties of their fellow subjects in the last resort. Whether they -were always so free from avarice, partialities, or want, that a bribe, or -some other sinister view, could have no place among them. Whether those -holy lords I spoke of were always promoted to that rank upon account of -their knowledge in religious matters, and the sanctity of their lives, -had never been compliers with the times while they were common priests, -or slavish prostitute chaplains to some nobleman, whose opinions they -continued servilely to follow after they were admitted into that assembly. - -He then desired to know what arts were practiced in electing those whom -I called commoners; whether a stranger with a strong purse might not -influence the vulgar voters to choose him before their own landlord, -or the most considerable gentleman in the neighborhood. How it came to -pass, that people were so violently bent upon getting into this assembly, -which I allowed to be a great trouble and expense, often to the ruin of -their families, without any salary or pension; because this appeared -such an exalted strain of virtue and public spirit, that his majesty -seemed to doubt it might possibly not be always sincere. And he desired -to know whether such zealous gentlemen could have any views of refunding -themselves for the charges and trouble they were at, by sacrificing the -public good to the designs of a weak and vicious prince in conjunction -with a corrupted ministry. He multiplied his questions, and sifted me -thoroughly upon every part of this head, proposing numberless inquiries -and objections, which I think it not prudent or convenient to repeat. - -Upon what I said in relation to our courts of justice his majesty desired -to be satisfied in several points; and this I was the better able to do, -having been formerly almost ruined by a long suit in chancery, which -was decreed for me with costs. He asked what time was usually spent in -determining between right and wrong, and what degree of expense. Whether -advocates and orators had liberty to plead in causes manifestly known -to be unjust, vexatious, or oppressive. Whether party in religion or -politics were observed to be of any weight in the scale of justice. -Whether those pleading orators were persons educated in the general -knowledge of equity, or only in provincial, national, and other local -customs. Whether they or their judges had any part in penning those laws -which they assumed the liberty of interpreting and glossing upon at their -pleasure. Whether they had ever, at different times, pleaded for and -against the same cause, and cited precedents to prove contrary opinions. -Whether they were a rich or a poor corporation. Whether they received -any pecuniary reward for pleading, or delivering their opinions. And -particularly, whether they were ever admitted as members in the lower -senate. - -He fell next upon the management of our treasury; and said he thought my -memory had failed me, because I computed our taxes at about five or six -millions a year, and when I came to mention the issues, he found they -sometimes amounted to more than double: for the notes he had taken were -very particular in this point, because he hoped, as he told me, that the -knowledge of our conduct might be useful to him, and he could not be -deceived in his calculations. But if what I told him were true, he was -still at a loss how a kingdom could run out of its estate like a private -person. He asked me who were our creditors; and where we should find -money to pay them. He wondered to hear me talk of such chargeable and -extensive wars; that certainly we must be a quarrelsome people, or live -among very bad neighbors, and that our generals must needs be richer than -our kings. He asked what business we had out of our own islands, unless -upon the score of trade or treaty, or to defend the coasts with our -fleet. Above all, he was amazed to hear me talk of a mercenary standing -army in the midst of peace, and among a free people. He said if we were -governed by our own consent in the persons of our representatives, he -could not imagine of whom we were afraid, or against whom we were to -fight; and would hear my opinion, whether a private man’s house might not -better be defended by himself, his children, and family, than by half a -dozen rascals picked up at a venture in the streets for small wages, who -might get a hundred times more by cutting their throats. - -He laughed at my odd kind of arithmetic, as he was pleased to call it, -in reckoning the numbers of our people by a computation drawn from the -several sects among us in religion and politics. He said he knew no -reason why those who entertain opinions prejudicial to the public, should -be obliged to change, or should not be obliged to conceal them. And as it -was tyranny in any government to require the first, so it was weakness -not to enforce the second: for a man may be allowed to keep poisons in -his closet, but not to vend them about for cordials. - -He observed, that among the diversions of our nobility and gentry, I -had mentioned gaming. He desired to know at what age this entertainment -was usually taken up, and when it was laid down; how much of their time -it employed; whether it ever went so high as to affect their fortunes; -whether mean vicious people by their dexterity in that art might not -arrive at great riches, and sometimes keep our very nobles in dependence, -as well as habituate them to vile companions, wholly take from them the -improvement of their minds, and force them, by the losses they have -received, to learn and practice that infamous dexterity upon others. - -He was perfectly astonished with the historical account I gave him of -our affairs during the last century, protesting it was only a heap of -conspiracies, rebellions, murders, massacres, revolutions, banishments, -the very worst effects that avarice, faction, hypocrisy, perfidiousness, -cruelty, rage, madness, hatred, envy, lust, malice, or ambition could -produce. - -His majesty, in another audience, was at the pains to recapitulate the -sum of all I had spoken; compared the questions he made with the answers -I had given; then taking me into his hands, and stroking me gently, -delivered himself in these words, which I shall never forget, nor the -manner he spoke them in: “My little friend Grildrig, you have made a -most admirable panegyric upon your country; you have clearly proved that -ignorance, idleness, and vice may be sometimes the only ingredients for -qualifying a legislator; that laws are best explained, interpreted, -and applied, by those whose interest and abilities lie in perverting, -confounding, and eluding them. I observe among you some lines of an -institution which in its original might have been tolerable, but these -half erased, and the rest wholly blurred and blotted by corruptions. It -does not appear, from all you have said, how any one virtue is required -towards the procurement of any one station among you; much less that men -are ennobled on account of their virtue; that priests are advanced by -their piety or learning; soldiers for their conduct or valor; judges for -their integrity; senators for the love of their country; or counselors -for their wisdom. As for yourself,” continued the king, “who have spent -the greatest part of your life in traveling, I am well disposed to hope -you may hitherto have escaped many vices of your country. But by what I -have gathered from your own relation, and the answers I have with much -pains wringed and extorted from you, I cannot but conclude the bulk of -your natives to be the most pernicious race of little odious vermin that -nature ever suffered to crawl upon the surface of the earth.” - - - - -CHAPTER VII - - THE AUTHOR’S LOVE OF HIS COUNTRY—HE MAKES A PROPOSAL OF MUCH - ADVANTAGE TO THE KING, WHICH IS REJECTED—THE KING’S GREAT - IGNORANCE IN POLITICS—THE LEARNING OF THAT COUNTRY VERY - IMPERFECT AND CONFINED—THE LAWS, AND MILITARY AFFAIRS, AND - PARTIES IN THE STATE. - - -Nothing but an extreme love of truth could have hindered me from -concealing this part of my story. It was in vain to discover my -resentments, which were always turned into ridicule; and I was forced to -rest with patience while my noble and beloved country was so injuriously -treated. I am heartily sorry as any of my readers can possibly be, that -such an occasion was given; but this prince happened to be so curious -and inquisitive upon every particular, that it could not consist either -with gratitude or good manners to refuse giving him what satisfaction I -was able. Yet thus much I may be allowed to say in my own vindication, -that I artfully eluded many of his questions, and gave to every point -a more favorable turn, by many degrees, than the strictness of truth -would allow. For I have always borne that laudable partiality to my -own country, which Dionysius Halicarnassensis with so much justice -recommends to an historian: I would hide the frailties and deformities -of my political mother, and place her virtues and beauties in the most -advantageous light. This was my sincere endeavor in those many discourses -I had with that monarch, although it unfortunately failed of success. - -But great allowances should be given to a king who lives wholly -secluded from the rest of the world, and must therefore be altogether -unacquainted with the manners and customs that most prevail in other -nations; the want of which knowledge will ever produce many prejudices, -and a certain narrowness of thinking, from which we and the politer -countries of Europe are wholly exempted. And it would be hard indeed, if -so remote a prince’s notions of virtue and vice were to be offered as a -standard for all mankind. - -To confirm what I have now said, and further to show the miserable -effects of a confined education, I shall here insert a passage which -will hardly obtain belief. In hopes to ingratiate myself further into -his majesty’s favor, I told him of an invention discovered between three -and four hundred years ago, to make a certain powder, into a heap of -which the smallest spark of fire falling, would kindle the whole in a -moment, although it were as big as a mountain, and make it all fly up in -the air together, with a noise and agitation greater than thunder. That -a proper quantity of this powder rammed into a hollow tube of brass or -iron, according to its bigness, would drive a ball of iron or lead with -such a violence and speed as nothing was able to sustain its force. That -the largest balls thus discharged, would not only destroy whole ranks of -an army at once, but batter the strongest walls to the ground; sink down -ships with a thousand men in each, to the bottom of the sea; and when -linked together by a chain, would cut through masts and rigging, divide -hundreds of bodies in the middle, and lay all waste before them. That we -often put this powder into large hollow balls of iron, and discharged -them by an engine into some city we were besieging, which would rip up -the pavements, tear the houses to pieces, burst and throw splinters on -every side, dashing out the brains of all who came near. That I knew the -ingredients very well, which were cheap and common; I understood the -manner of compounding them, and could direct his workmen how to make -those tubes of a size proportionable to all other things in his majesty’s -kingdom, and the largest need not be above a hundred feet long; twenty -or thirty of which tubes, charged with the proper quantity of powder and -balls, would batter down the walls of the strongest town in his dominions -in a few hours, or destroy the whole metropolis, if ever it should -pretend to dispute his absolute commands. This I humbly offered to his -majesty as a small tribute of acknowledgment in return of so many marks -that I had received of his royal favor and protection. - -The king was struck with horror at the description I had given of those -terrible engines, and the proposal I had made. He was amazed how so -impotent and groveling an insect as I (these were his expressions) -could entertain such inhuman ideas, and in so familiar a manner as to -appear wholly unmoved at all the scenes of blood and desolation which -I had painted as the common effects of those destructive machines; -whereof, he said, some evil genius, enemy to mankind, must have been the -first contriver. As for himself, he protested that although few things -delighted him so much as new discoveries in art or in nature, yet he -would rather lose half his kingdom than be privy to such a secret, which -he commanded me, as I valued my life, never to mention any more. - -A strange effect of narrow principles and short views! that a prince -possessed of every quality which procures veneration, love, and esteem; -of strong parts, great wisdom, and profound learning; indued with -admirable talents for government, and almost adored by his subjects, -should from a nice unnecessary scruple, whereof in Europe we can have no -conception, let slip an opportunity put into his hands that would have -made him absolute master of the lives, the liberties, and the fortunes -of his people. Neither do I say this with the least intention to detract -from the many virtues of that excellent king, whose character, I am -sensible, will on this account be very much lessened in the opinion -of an English reader; but I take this defect among them to have risen -from their ignorance, they not having hitherto reduced politics into a -science, as the more acute wits of Europe have done. For, I remember very -well, in a discourse one day with the king, when I happened to say there -were several thousand books among us written upon the art of government, -it gave him (directly contrary to my intention) a very mean opinion -of our understandings. He professed both to abominate and despise all -mystery, refinement, and intrigue, either in a prince or a minister. He -could not tell what I meant by secrets of state, where an enemy or some -rival nation were not in the case. He confined the knowledge of governing -within very narrow bounds, to common sense and reason, to justice and -lenity, to the speedy determination of civil and criminal causes; with -some other obvious topics which are not worth considering. And he gave it -for his opinion, that whoever could make two ears of corn, or two blades -of grass, to grow upon a spot of ground where only one grew before, would -deserve better of mankind, and do more essential service to his country -than the whole race of politicians put together. - -The learning of this people is very defective, consisting only in -morality, history, poetry, and mathematics, wherein they must be allowed -to excel. But the last of these is wholly applied to what may be useful -in life, to the improvement of agriculture and all mechanical arts; so -that among us it would be little esteemed. And as to ideas, entities, -abstractions, and transcendentals, I could never drive the least -conception into their heads. - -No law of that country must exceed in words the number of letters in -their alphabet, which consists only in two-and-twenty. But indeed few of -them extend even to that length. They are expressed in the most plain and -simple terms, wherein those people are not mercurial enough to discover -above one interpretation; and to write a comment upon any law is a -capital crime. As to the decision of civil causes, or proceedings against -criminals, their precedents are so few, that they have little reason to -boast of any extraordinary skill in either. - -They have had the art of printing, as well as the Chinese, time out of -mind. But their libraries are not very large; for that of the king, which -is reckoned the biggest, does not amount to above a thousand volumes, -placed in a gallery of twelve hundred feet long, whence I had liberty to -borrow what books I pleased. The queen’s joiner had contrived in one of -Glumdalclitch’s rooms a kind of wooden machine five-and-twenty feet high, -formed like a standing ladder; the steps were each fifty feet long; it -was indeed a moveable pair of stairs, the lowest end placed at ten feet -distance from the wall of the chamber. The book I had a mind to read, -was put up leaning against the wall. I first mounted to the upper step -of the ladder, and turning my face towards the book, began at the top of -the page, and so walking to the right and left about eight or ten paces, -according to the length of the lines, till I had gotten a little below -the level of mine eyes, and then descending gradually till I came to the -bottom; after which I mounted again, and began the other page in the same -manner, and so turned over the leaf, which I could easily do with both my -hands, for it was as thick and stiff as a pasteboard, and in the largest -folios not above eighteen or twenty feet long. - -Their style is clear, masculine, and smooth, but not florid; for they -avoid nothing more than multiplying unnecessary words, or using various -expressions. I have perused many of their books, especially those -in history and morality. Among the rest, I was much diverted with a -little old treatise, which always lay in Glumdalclitch’s bedchamber, -and belonged to her governess, a grave elderly gentlewoman, who dealt -in writings of morality and devotion. The book treats of the weakness -of human kind, and is in little esteem except among the women and the -vulgar. However, I was curious to see what an author of that country -could say upon such a subject. This writer went through all the usual -topics of European moralists, showing how diminutive, contemptible, -and helpless an animal was man in his own nature; how unable to defend -himself from the inclemencies of the air, or the fury of wild beasts; how -much he was excelled by one creature in strength, by another in speed, -by a third in foresight, by a fourth in industry. He added that nature -was degenerated in these latter declining ages of the world, and could -now produce only small abortive births in comparison of those in ancient -times. He said it was very reasonable to think, not only that the species -of men were originally much larger, but also that there must have been -giants in former ages, which, as it is asserted by history and tradition, -so it has been confirmed by huge bones and skulls casually dug up in -several parts of the kingdom, far exceeding the common dwindled race -of man in our days. He argued that the very laws of nature absolutely -required we should have been made, in the beginning, of a size more large -and robust, not so liable to destruction from every little accident of a -tile falling from a house or a stone cast from the hand of a boy, or of -being drowned in a little brook. From this way of reasoning the author -drew several moral applications, useful in the conduct of life, but -needless here to repeat. For my own part, I could not avoid reflecting -how universally this talent was spread of drawing lectures in morality, -or indeed rather matter of discontent and repining, from the quarrels we -raise with nature. And I believe, upon a strict inquiry, those quarrels -might be shown as ill-grounded among us as they are among that people. - -As to their military affairs, they boast that the king’s army consists of -a hundred and seventy-six thousand foot and thirty-two thousand horse: -if that may be called an army which is made up of tradesmen in the -several cities, and farmers in the country, whose commanders are only -the nobility and gentry, without pay or reward. They are indeed perfect -enough in their exercises, and under very good discipline, wherein I saw -no great merit; for how should it be otherwise, where every farmer is -under the command of his own landlord, and every citizen under that of -the principal men in his own city, chosen, after the manner of Venice, -by ballot? I have often seen the militia of Lorbrulgrud drawn out to -exercise in a great field near the city, of twenty miles square. They -were in all not above twenty-five thousand foot, and six thousand horse; -but it was impossible for me to compute their number, considering the -space of ground they took up. A cavalier mounted on a large steed might -be about a hundred feet high. I have seen this whole body of horse, -upon a word of command, draw their swords at once and brandish them in -the air. Imagination can figure nothing so grand, so surprising, and -so astonishing! It looked as if ten thousand flashes of lightning were -darting at the same time from every quarter of the sky. - -I was curious to know how this prince, to whose dominions there is no -access from any other country, came to think of armies, or to teach his -people the practice of military discipline. But I was soon informed, -both by conversation and reading their histories; for in the course of -many ages they have been troubled with the same disease to which so many -other governments are subject: the nobility often contending for power, -the people for liberty, and the king for absolute dominion. All which, -however happily tempered by the laws of the kingdom, have been sometimes -violated by each of the three parties, and have once or more occasioned -civil wars; the last whereof was happily put an end to by this prince’s -grandfather by a general composition; and the militia then settled with -common consent has been ever since kept in the strictest duty. - - - - -CHAPTER VIII - - THE KING AND QUEEN MAKE A PROGRESS TO THE FRONTIERS—THE AUTHOR - ATTENDS THEM—THE MANNER IN WHICH HE LEAVES THE COUNTRY VERY - PARTICULARLY RELATED—HE RETURNS TO ENGLAND. - - -I had always a strong impulse that I should sometime recover my liberty, -though it was impossible to conjecture by what means, or to form any -project with the least hope of succeeding. The ship in which I sailed -was the first ever known to be driven within sight of that coast, and -the king had given strict orders that if at any time another appeared, -it should be taken ashore, and with all its crew and passengers brought -in a tumbril to Lorbrulgrud. He was strongly bent to get me a woman of -my own size, by whom I might propagate the breed; but I think I should -rather have died than undergone the disgrace of leaving a posterity to -be kept in cages like tame canary birds, and perhaps in time sold about -the kingdom to persons of quality, for curiosities. I was indeed treated -with much kindness: I was the favorite of a great king and queen, and -the delight of the whole court; but it was upon such a footing as ill -became the dignity of human kind. I could never forget those domestic -pledges I had left behind me. I wanted to be among people with whom I -could converse upon even terms, and walk about the streets and fields -without fear of being trod to death like a frog or a young puppy. But my -deliverance came sooner than I expected, and in a manner not very common; -the whole story and circumstances of which I shall faithfully relate. - -I had now been two years in this country; and about the beginning of the -third, Glumdalclitch and I attended the king and queen in a progress to -the south coast of the kingdom. I was carried as usual in my traveling -box, which, as I have already described, was a very convenient closet -of twelve feet wide. And I had ordered a hammock to be fixed by silken -ropes from the four corners at the top, to break the jolts when a servant -carried me before him on horseback, as I sometimes desired; and would -often sleep in my hammock while we were upon the road. On the roof of my -closet, not directly over the middle of the hammock, I ordered the joiner -to cut out a hole of a foot square, to give me air in hot weather as I -slept; which hole I shut at pleasure with a board that drew backwards and -forwards through a groove. - -When we came to our journey’s end, the king thought proper to pass a -few days at a palace he has near Flanflasnic, a city within eighteen -English miles of the seaside. Glumdalclitch and I were much fatigued; I -had gotten a small cold, but the poor girl was so ill as to be confined -to her chamber. I longed to see the ocean, which must be the only scene -of my escape, if ever it should happen. I pretended to be worse than I -really was, and desired leave to take the fresh air of the sea, with a -page whom I was very fond of, and who had sometimes been trusted with me. -I shall never forget with what unwillingness Glumdalclitch consented, -nor the strict charge she gave the page to be careful of me, bursting at -the same time into a flood of tears, as if she had some foreboding of -what was to happen. The boy took me out in my box, about half an hour’s -walk from the palace, towards the rocks on the seashore. I ordered him -to set me down, and lifting up one of my sashes, cast many a wistful -melancholy look towards the sea. I found myself not very well, and told -the page that I had a mind to take a nap in my hammock, which I hoped -would do me good. I got in, and the boy shut the window close down to -keep out the cold. I soon fell asleep, and all I can conjecture is that -while I slept, the page, thinking no danger could happen, went among the -rocks to look for birds’ eggs, having before observed him from my window -searching about, and picking up one or two in the clefts. Be that as it -will, I found myself suddenly awakened with a violent pull upon the ring -which was fastened at the top of my box for the conveniency of carriage. -I felt my box raised very high in the air, and then borne forward with -prodigious speed. The first jolt had like to have shaken me out of my -hammock, but afterwards the motion was easy enough. I called out several -times as loud as I could raise my voice, but all to no purpose. I looked -towards my windows, and could see nothing but the clouds and sky. I -heard a noise over my head like the clapping of wings, and then began -to perceive the woeful condition I was in; that some eagle had got the -ring of my box in his beak, with an intent to let it fall on a rock like -a tortoise in a shell, and then pick out my body and devour it: for the -sagacity and smell of this bird enable him to discover his quarry at a -great distance, though better concealed than I could be within a two-inch -board. - -In a little time I observed the noise and flutter of wings to increase -very fast, and my box was tossed up and down like a signpost in a windy -day. I heard several bangs or buffets, as I thought, given to the eagle -(for such I am certain it must have been that held the ring of my box in -his beak), and then all on a sudden felt myself falling perpendicularly -down for above a minute, but with such incredible swiftness that I almost -lost my breath. My fall was stopped by a terrible squash, that sounded -louder to my ears than the cataract of Niagara; after which, I was quite -in the dark for another minute, and then my box began to rise so high -that I could see light from the tops of my windows. I now perceived I was -fallen into the sea. My box, by the weight of my body, the goods that -were in it, and the broad plates of iron fixed for strength at the four -corners of the top and bottom, floated about five feet deep in water. -I did then and do now suppose that the eagle which flew away with my -box was pursued by two or three others, and forced to let me drop while -he was defending himself against the rest, who hoped to share in the -prey. The plates of iron fastened at the bottom of the box (for those -were the strongest) preserved the balance while it fell, and hindered -it from being broken on the surface of the water. Every joint of it was -well grooved; and the door did not move on hinges, but up and down like -a sash, which kept my closet so tight that very little water came in. I -got with much difficulty out of my hammock, having first ventured to draw -back the slip-board on the roof already mentioned, contrived on purpose -to let in air, for want of which I found myself almost stifled. - -How often did I then wish myself with my dear Glumdalclitch, from whom -one single hour had so far divided me! And I may say with truth, that -in the midst of my own misfortunes I could not forbear lamenting my -poor nurse, the grief she would suffer for my loss, the displeasure of -the queen, and the ruin of her fortune. Perhaps many travelers have -not been under greater difficulties and distress than I was at this -juncture, expecting every moment to see my box dashed in pieces, or at -least overset by the first violent blast, or a rising wave. A breach -in one single pane of glass would have been immediate death; nor could -anything have preserved the windows but the strong lattice wires placed -on the outside against accidents in traveling. I saw the water ooze in -at several crannies, although the leaks were not considerable, and I -endeavored to stop them as well as I could. I was not able to lift up -the roof of my closet, which otherwise I certainly should have done, -and sat on the top of it, where I might at least preserve myself some -hours longer than by being shut up, as I may call it, in the hold. Or -if I escaped these dangers for a day or two, what could I expect but -a miserable death of cold and hunger? I was four hours under these -circumstances, expecting and indeed wishing every moment to be my last. - -I have already told the reader that there were two strong staples fixed -upon that side of my box which had no window, and into which the servant -who used to carry me on horseback would put a leathern belt, and buckle -it about his waist. Being in this disconsolate state, I heard, or at -least thought I heard, some kind of grating noise on that side of my -box where the staples were fixed, and soon after I began to fancy that -the box was pulled or towed along in the sea; for I now and then felt a -sort of tugging which made the waves rise near the tops of my windows, -leaving me almost in the dark. This gave me some faint hopes of relief, -although I was not able to imagine how it could be brought about. I -ventured to unscrew one of my chairs, which were always fastened to the -floor; and having made a hard shift to screw it down again directly under -the slipping-board that I had lately opened, I mounted on the chair, and -putting my mouth as near as I could to the hole, I called for help in a -loud voice, and in all the languages I understood. I then fastened my -handkerchief to a stick I usually carried, and thrusting it up the hole, -waved it several times in the air, that if any boat or ship were near, -the seamen might conjecture some unhappy mortal to be shut up in this -box. - -[Illustration: “_I heard a noise over my head like the clapping of wings_” - -_Page 157_] - -I found no effect from all I could do, but plainly perceived my closet to -be moved along; and in the space of an hour, or better, that side of the -box where the staples were, and had no window, struck against something -that was hard. I apprehended it to be a rock, and found myself tossed -more than ever. I plainly heard a noise upon the cover of my closet, like -that of a cable, and the grating of it as it passed through the ring. -I then found myself hoisted up, by degrees, at least three feet higher -than I was before. Whereupon I again thrust up my stick and handkerchief, -calling for help till I was almost hoarse. In return to which, I heard -a great shout repeated three times, giving me such transports of joy -as are not to be conceived but by those who feel them. I now heard a -trampling over my head, and somebody calling through the hole with a loud -voice, in the English tongue, “If there be anybody below let him speak.” -I answered, I was an Englishman, drawn by ill fortune into the greatest -calamity that ever any creature underwent, and begged, by all that is -moving, to be delivered out of the dungeon I was in. The voice replied, -I was safe, for my box was fastened to their ship; and the carpenter -should immediately come and saw a hole in the cover, large enough to pull -me out. I answered, that was needless, and would take up too much time; -for there was no more to be done but let one of the crew put his finger -into the ring, and take the box out of the sea into the ship, and so -into the captain’s cabin. Some of them, upon hearing me talk so wildly, -thought I was mad; others laughed; for indeed it never came into my head -that I was now among people of my own stature and strength. The carpenter -came, and in a few minutes sawed a passage about four feet square, then -let down a small ladder, upon which I mounted, and from thence was taken -into the ship in a very weak condition. - -The sailors were all in amazement, and asked me a thousand questions, -which I had no inclination to answer. I was equally confounded at the -sight of so many pigmies, for such I took them to be, after having so -long accustomed my eyes to the monstrous objects I had left. But the -captain, Mr. Thomas Wilcocks, an honest worthy Shropshire man, observing -I was ready to faint, took me into his cabin, gave me a cordial to -comfort me, and made me turn in upon his own bed, advising me to take a -little rest, of which I had great need. Before I went to sleep, I gave -him to understand that I had some valuable furniture in my box, too good -to be lost: a fine hammock, a handsome field bed, two chairs, a table, -and a cabinet; that my closet was hung on all sides, or rather quilted, -with silk and cotton; that if he would let one of the crew bring my -closet into his cabin, I would open it there before him, and show him my -goods. The captain, hearing me utter these absurdities, concluded I was -raving; however (I suppose to pacify me), he promised to give order as I -desired, and going upon deck, sent some of his men down into my closet, -from whence (as I afterwards found), they drew up all my goods, and -stripped off the quilting; but the chairs, cabinet, and bedstead, being -screwed to the floor, were much damaged by the ignorance of the seamen, -who tore them up by force. They then knocked off some of the boards for -the use of the ship, and when they had got all they had a mind for, let -the hulk drop into the sea, which, by reason of many breaches made in the -bottom and sides, sunk to rights. And, indeed, I was glad not to have -been a spectator of the havoc they made; because I am confident it would -have sensibly touched me, by bringing former passages into my mind which -I had rather forget. - -I slept some hours, but perpetually disturbed with dreams of the place -I had left, and the dangers I had escaped. However, upon waking I found -myself much recovered. It was now about eight o’clock at night, and the -captain ordered supper immediately, thinking I had already fasted too -long. He entertained me with great kindness, observing me not to look -wildly, or talk inconsistently; and when we were left alone, desired I -would relate to him my travels, and by what accident I came to be set -adrift in that monstrous wooden chest. He said that about twelve o’clock -at noon, as he was looking through his glass, he spied it at a distance, -and thought it was a sail, which he had a mind to make, being not much -out of his course, in hopes of buying some biscuit, his own beginning to -fall short. That upon coming nearer, and finding his error, he sent out -his longboat, to discover what I was; that his men came back in a fright, -swearing they had seen a swimming house. That he laughed at their folly, -and went himself in the boat, ordering his men to take a strong cable -along with them. That the weather being calm, he rowed round me several -times, observed my windows and the wire lattices that defended them. -That he discovered two staples upon one side, which was all of boards, -without any passage for light. He then commanded his men to row up to -that side, and fastening a cable to one of the staples, ordered them to -tow my chest, as he called it, towards the ship. When it was there, he -gave directions to fasten another cable to the ring fixed in the cover, -and to raise my chest with pulleys, which all the sailors were not able -to do above two or three feet. He said they saw my stick and handkerchief -thrust out of the hole, and concluded that some unhappy man must be shut -up in the cavity. I asked whether he or the crew had seen any prodigious -birds in the air, about the time he first discovered me. To which he -answered, that discussing this matter with the sailors while I was -asleep, one of them said he had observed three eagles flying towards the -north, but remarked nothing of their being larger than the usual size, -which I suppose must be imputed to the great height they were at; and -could not guess the reason of my question. I then asked the captain how -far he reckoned we might be from land. He said, by the best computation -he could make, we were at least a hundred leagues. I assured him that he -must be mistaken by almost half, for I had not left the country whence I -came above two hours before I dropped into the sea. Whereupon he began -again to think my brain was disturbed, of which he gave me a hint, and -advised me to go to bed in a cabin he had provided. I assured him I was -well refreshed with his good entertainment and company, and as much in -my senses as ever I was in my life. He then grew serious, and desired to -ask me freely whether I were not troubled in mind by the consciousness -of some enormous crime, for which I was punished at the command of -some prince, by exposing me in that chest; as great criminals in other -countries have been forced to sea in a leaky vessel, without provisions; -for although he should be sorry to have taken so ill a man into his ship, -yet he would engage his word to set me safe on shore, in the first port -where we arrived. He added, that his suspicions were much increased by -some very absurd speeches I had delivered at first to the sailors, and -afterwards to himself, in relation to my closet or chest, as well as by -my odd looks and behavior while I was at supper. - -I begged his patience to hear me tell my story, which I faithfully did, -from the last time I left England to the moment he first discovered me. -And as truth always forces its way into rational minds, so this honest -worthy gentleman, who had some tincture of learning, and very good sense, -was immediately convinced of my candor and veracity. But, further to -confirm all I had said, I entreated him to give order that my cabinet -be brought, of which I had the key in my pocket; for he had already -informed me how the seamen disposed of my closet. I opened it in his -presence, and showed him the small collection of rarities I made in the -country from whence I had been so strangely delivered. There was the comb -I had contrived out of the stumps of the king’s beard, and another of -the same material, but fixed into a paring of her majesty’s thumb nail, -which served for the back. There was a collection of needles and pins, -from a foot to half a yard long; four wasp stings like joiners’ tacks; -some combings of the queen’s hair; a gold ring which one day she made -me a present of in a most obliging manner, taking it from her little -finger and throwing it over my head like a collar. I desired the captain -would please to accept this ring in return of his civilities; which he -absolutely refused. Lastly, I desired him to see the breeches I had then -on, which were made of a mouse’s skin. - -I could force nothing on him but a footman’s tooth, which I observed -him to examine with great curiosity, and found he had a fancy for it. -He received it with abundance of thanks, more than such a trifle could -deserve. It was drawn by an unskillful surgeon, in a mistake, from one of -Glumdalclitch’s men, who was afflicted with the toothache, but it was as -sound as any in his head. I got it cleaned, and put it into my cabinet. -It was about a foot long, and four inches in diameter. - -The captain was very well satisfied with this plain relation I had given -him, and said he hoped, when we returned to England, I would oblige the -world by putting it on paper, and making it public. My answer was, that -I thought we were already overstocked with books of travel; that nothing -could now pass which was not extraordinary; wherein I doubted some -authors less consulted truth than their own vanity or interest, or the -diversion of ignorant readers; that my story could contain little besides -common events, without those ornamental descriptions of strange plants, -trees, birds, and other animals, or of the barbarous customs and idolatry -of savage people, with which most writers abound. However, I thanked him -for his good opinion, and promised to take the matter into my thoughts. - -He said he wondered at one thing very much, which was to hear me speak so -loud; asking me whether the king and queen of that country were thick of -hearing. I told him it was what I had been used to for above two years -past, and that I admired as much at the voices of him and his men, who -seemed to me only to whisper, and yet I could hear them well enough. But -when I spoke in that country, it was like a man talking in the street to -another looking out from the top of a steeple, unless when I was placed -on a table, or held in any person’s hand. I told him, I had likewise -observed another thing, that when I first got into the ship, and the -sailors stood all about me, I thought they were the most contemptible -little creatures I had ever beheld. For, indeed, while I was in that -prince’s country, I could never endure to look in a glass after my eyes -had been accustomed to such prodigious objects, because the comparison -gave me so despicable a conceit of myself. The captain said that while -we were at supper he observed me to look at everything with a sort of -wonder, and that I often seemed hardly able to contain my laughter, which -he knew not well how to take, but imputed it to some disorder in my -brain. I answered, it was very true; and I wondered how I could forbear, -when I saw his dishes of the size of a silver threepence, a leg of pork -hardly a mouthful, a cup not so big as a nutshell; and so I went on, -describing the rest of his household stuff and provisions after the same -manner. For, although the queen had ordered a little equipage of all -things necessary for me, while I was in her service, yet my ideas were -wholly taken up with what I saw on every side of me, and I winked at my -own littleness as people do at their own faults. The captain understood -my raillery very well, and merrily replied with the old English proverb, -that he doubted my eyes were bigger than my belly, for he did not observe -my stomach so good, although I had fasted all day; and continuing in his -mirth, protested he would have gladly given a hundred pounds to have seen -my closet in the eagle’s bill, and afterwards in its fall from so great a -height into the sea; which would certainly have been a most astonishing -object, worthy to have the description of it transmitted to future ages; -and the comparison of Phaëthon was so obvious that he could not forbear -applying it, although I did not much admire the conceit. - -The captain, having been at Tonquin, was in his return to England -driven northeastward to the latitude of 44 degrees, and of longitude -143. But meeting a trade-wind two days after I came on board him, we -sailed southward a long time, and coasting New Holland, kept our course -west-south-west, and then south-south-west, till we doubled the Cape of -Good Hope. Our voyage was very prosperous, but I shall not trouble the -reader with a journal of it. The captain called in at one or two ports, -and sent in his longboat for provisions and fresh water; but I never went -out of the ship till we came into the Downs, which was on the third day -of June, 1706, about nine months after my escape. I offered to leave my -goods in security for payment of my freight, but the captain protested he -would not receive one farthing. We took kind leave of each other, and I -made him promise he would come to see me at my house in Redriff. I hired -a horse and guide for five shillings, which I borrowed of the captain. - -As I was on the road, observing the littleness of the houses, the trees, -the cattle, and the people, I began to think myself in Lilliput. I was -afraid of trampling on every traveler I met, and often called aloud to -have them stand out of the way, so that I had like to have gotten one or -two broken heads for my impertinence. - -When I came to my own house, for which I was forced to inquire, one of -the servants opening the door, I bent down to go in (like a goose under -a gate), for fear of striking my head. My wife ran out to embrace me, -but I stooped lower than her knees, thinking she could otherwise never -be able to reach my mouth. My daughter kneeled to ask my blessing, but -I could not see her till she arose, having been so long used to stand -with my head and eyes erect to above sixty feet, and then I went to take -her up with one hand by the waist. I looked down upon the servants, and -one or two friends who were in the house, as if they had been pigmies, -and I a giant. I told my wife she had been too thrifty, for I found she -had starved herself and her daughter to nothing. In short, I behaved -myself so unaccountably that they were all of the captain’s opinion when -he first saw me, and concluded I had lost my wits. This I mention as an -instance of the great power of habit and prejudice. - -In a little time, I and my family and friends came to a right -understanding, but my wife protested I should never go to sea any more; -although my evil destiny so ordered that she had not power to hinder me, -as the reader may know hereafter. In the meantime, I here conclude the -second part of my unfortunate voyages. - - -THE END OF THE SECOND PART. - - - - -A VOYAGE TO LAPUTA, BALNIBARBI, LUGGNAGG, GLUBBDUBDRIB, AND JAPAN - - - - -CHAPTER I - - THE AUTHOR SETS OUT ON HIS THIRD VOYAGE—IS TAKEN BY PIRATES—THE - MALICE OF A DUTCHMAN—HIS ARRIVAL AT AN ISLAND—HE IS RECEIVED - INTO LAPUTA. - - -I had not been at home above ten days, when Captain William Robinson, -a Cornishman, commander of the Hopewell, a stout ship of three hundred -tons, came to my house. I had formerly been surgeon of another ship -where he was master and a fourth-part owner, in a voyage to the Levant. -He had always treated me more like a brother than an inferior officer; -and hearing of my arrival, made me a visit, as I apprehended only out -of friendship, for nothing passed more than what is usual after long -absences. But repeating his visits often, expressing his joy to find -me in good health, asking whether I were now settled for life, adding -that he intended a voyage to the East Indies in about two months; at -last he plainly invited me, though with some apologies, to be surgeon of -the ship; that I should have another surgeon under me, besides our two -mates; that my salary should be double to the usual pay; and that having -experienced my knowledge in sea affairs to be at least equal to his, he -would enter into any engagement to follow my advice, as much as if I had -shared in the command. - -He said so many other obliging things, and I knew him to be so honest a -man, that I could not reject his proposal; the thirst I had of seeing -the world, notwithstanding my past misfortunes, continuing as violent as -ever. The only difficulty that remained, was to persuade my wife, whose -consent, however, I at last obtained by the prospect of advantage she -proposed to her children. - -We set out on the 5th of August, 1706, and arrived at Fort St. George -the 11th of April, 1707, stayed there three weeks to refresh our crew, -many of whom were sick. From thence we went to Tonquin, where the captain -resolved to continue some time, because many of the goods he intended -to buy were not ready, nor could he expect to be dispatched in some -months. Therefore, in hopes to defray some of the charges he must be -at, he bought a sloop, loaded it with several sorts of goods wherewith -the Tonquinese usually trade to the neighboring islands, and putting -fourteen men on board, whereof three were of the country, he appointed me -master of the sloop, and gave me power to traffic for two months while he -transacted his affairs at Tonquin. - -We had not sailed above three days, when a great storm arising, we were -driven five days to the north-north-east, and then to the east; after -which we had fair weather, but still with a pretty strong gale from the -west. Upon the tenth day we were chased by two pirates, who soon overtook -us; for my sloop was so deep laden, that she sailed very slow, neither -were we in a condition to defend ourselves. We were boarded about the -same time by both the pirates, who entered furiously at the head of their -men; but finding us all prostrate upon our faces (for so I gave order), -they pinioned us with strong ropes, and setting a guard upon us, went to -search the sloop. - -I observed among them a Dutchman, who seemed to be of some authority, -though he was not commander of either ship. He knew us by our -countenances to be Englishmen, and jabbering to us in his own language, -swore we should be tied back to back and thrown into the sea. I spoke -Dutch tolerably well; I told him who we were, and begged him, in -consideration of our being Christians and Protestants, of neighboring -countries in strict alliance, that he would move the captains to take -some pity on us. This inflamed his rage; he repeated his threatenings, -and turning to his companions, spoke with great vehemence in the Japanese -language, as I suppose, often using the word _Christianos_. - -The largest of the two pirate ships was commanded by a Japanese captain -who spoke a little Dutch, but very imperfectly. He came up to me, and -after several questions, which I answered in great humility, he said we -should not die. I made the captain a very low bow, and then turning to -the Dutchman, said I was sorry to find more mercy in a heathen than in a -brother Christian. But I had soon reason to repent those foolish words; -for that malicious reprobate, having often endeavored in vain to persuade -both the captains that I might be thrown into the sea (which they would -not yield to, after the promise made me that I should not die), however -prevailed so far as to have a punishment inflicted on me, worse in all -human appearance than death itself. My men were sent by an equal division -into both the pirate ships, and my sloop new manned. As to myself, it was -determined that I should be set adrift in a small canoe, with paddles -and a sail, and four days’ provisions; which last the Japanese captain -was so kind to double out of his own stores, and would permit no man to -search me. I got down into the canoe, while the Dutchman, standing upon -the deck, loaded me with all the curses and injurious terms his language -could afford. - -About an hour before we saw the pirates, I had taken an observation, -and found we were in the latitude of 46 N. and of longitude 183. When I -was at some distance from the pirates, I discovered by my pocket glass -several islands to the southeast. I set up my sail, the wind being fair, -with a design to reach the nearest of those islands, which I made a shift -to do in about three hours. It was all rocky; however, I got many birds’ -eggs; and striking fire, I kindled some heath and dry seaweed, by which -I roasted my eggs. I ate no other supper, being resolved to spare my -provisions as much as I could. I passed the night under the shelter of a -rock, strewing some heath under me, and slept pretty well. - -The next day I sailed to another island, and thence to a third and -fourth, sometimes using my sail, and sometimes my paddles. But not to -trouble the reader with a particular account of my distresses, let it -suffice that on the fifth day I arrived at the last island in my sight, -which lay south-south-east to the former. - -This island was at a greater distance than I expected, and I did not -reach it in less than five hours. I encompassed it almost round before -I could find a convenient place to land in; which was a small creek, -about three times the wideness of my canoe. I found the island to be all -rocky, only a little intermingled with tufts of grass, and sweet-smelling -herbs. I took out my small provisions, and after having refreshed myself, -I secured the remainder in a cave, whereof there were great numbers; I -gathered plenty of eggs upon the rocks, and got a quantity of dry seaweed -and parched grass, which I designed to kindle the next day, and roast -my eggs as well as I could, for I had about me my flint, steel, match, -and burning-glass. I lay all night in the cave where I had lodged my -provisions. My bed was the same dry grass and seaweed which I intended -for fuel. I slept very little, for the disquiets of my mind prevailed -over my weariness, and kept me awake. I considered how impossible it was -to preserve my life in so desolate a place, and how miserable my end must -be: yet I found myself so listless and desponding, that I had not the -heart to rise; and before I could get spirits enough to creep out of my -cave, the day was far advanced. I walked awhile among the rocks; the sky -was perfectly clear, and the sun so hot, that I was forced to turn my -face from it; when all on a sudden it became obscured, as I thought, in a -manner very different from what happens by the interposition of a cloud. -I turned back, and perceived a vast opaque body between me and the sun, -moving forwards towards the island; it seemed to be about two miles high, -and hid the sun six or seven minutes; but I did not observe the air to -be much colder, or the sky more darkened, than if I had stood under the -shade of a mountain. As it approached nearer over the place where I was, -it appeared to me a firm substance, the bottom flat, smooth, and shining -very bright from the reflection of the sea below. I stood upon a height -about two hundred yards from the shore, and saw this vast body descending -almost to a parallel with me, at less than an English mile distance. I -took out my pocket perspective, and could plainly discover numbers of -people moving up and down the sides of it, which appeared to be sloping; -but what those people were doing I was not able to distinguish. - -The natural love of life gave me some inward motions of joy, and I was -ready to entertain a hope that this adventure might, someway or other, -help to deliver me from the desolate place and condition I was in. But at -the same time, the reader can hardly conceive my astonishment, to behold -an island in the air, inhabited by men, who were able (as it should -seem) to raise or sink, or put it into a progressive motion, as they -pleased. But not being at that time in a disposition to philosophize upon -this phenomenon, I rather chose to observe what course the island would -take, because it seemed for awhile to stand still. Yet soon after, it -advanced nearer, and I could see the sides of it encompassed with several -gradations of galleries, and stairs at certain intervals to descend from -one to the other. In the lowest gallery, I beheld some people fishing -with long angling rods, and others looking on. I waved my cap (for my hat -was long since worn out) and my handkerchief towards the island; and upon -its nearer approach, I called and shouted with the utmost strength of my -voice; and then looking circumspectly, I beheld a crowd gathered to that -side which was most in my view. I found by their pointing towards me and -to each other, that they plainly discovered me, although they made no -return to my shouting. But I could see four or five men running in great -haste up the stairs to the top of the island, who then disappeared. I -happened rightly to conjecture that these were sent for orders to some -person in authority upon this occasion. - -The number of people increased, and in less than half an hour the island -was moved, and raised in such a manner that the lowest gallery appeared -in a parallel of less than a hundred yards’ distance from the height -where I stood. I then put myself in the most supplicating postures, -and spoke in the humblest accent, but received no answer. Those who -stood nearest over against me, seemed to be persons of distinction, as -I supposed by their habit. They conferred earnestly with each other, -looking often upon me. At length, one of them called out in a clear, -polite, smooth dialect, not unlike in sound to the Italian; and therefore -I returned an answer in that language, hoping at least that the cadence -might be more agreeable to his ears. Although neither of us understood -the other, yet my meaning was easily known, for the people saw the -distress I was in. - -They made signs for me to come down from the rock, and go towards the -shore, which I accordingly did; and the flying island being raised to a -convenient height, the verge directly over me, a chain was let down from -the lowest gallery, with a seat fastened to the bottom, to which I fixed -myself, and was drawn up by pulleys. - - - - -CHAPTER II - - THE HUMORS AND DISPOSITIONS OF THE LAPUTIANS DESCRIBED—AN - ACCOUNT OF THEIR LEARNING—OF THE KING AND HIS COURT—THE - AUTHOR’S RECEPTION THERE—THE INHABITANTS SUBJECT TO FEARS AND - DISQUIETUDES—AN ACCOUNT OF THE WOMEN. - - -At my alighting, I was surrounded with a crowd of people, but those who -stood nearest seemed to be of better quality. They beheld me with all the -marks and circumstances of wonder, neither indeed was I much in their -debt, having never till then seen a race of mortals so singular in their -shapes, habits, and countenances. Their heads were all reclined either -to the right or the left; one of their eyes turned inward, and the other -directly up to the zenith. Their outward garments were adorned with the -figures of suns, moons, and stars, interwoven with those of fiddles, -flutes, harps, trumpets, guitars, harpsichords, and many more instruments -of music unknown to us in Europe. I observed, here and there, many in -the habit of servants, with a blown bladder fastened like a flail to -the end of a short stick, which they carried in their hands. In each -bladder was a small quantity of dried peas, or little pebbles (as I was -afterwards informed). With these bladders they now and then flapped the -mouths and ears of those who stood near them, of which practice I could -not then conceive the meaning. It seems the minds of these people are -so taken up with intense speculations, that they neither can speak, nor -attend to the discourses of others without being roused by some external -taction upon the organs of speech and hearing; for which reason, those -persons who are able to afford it always keep a flapper (the original is -_climenole_) in their family, as one of their domestics; nor ever walk -abroad or make visits without him. And the business of this officer is, -when two or three more persons are in company, gently to strike with -his bladder the mouth of him who is to speak, and the right ear of him -or them to whom the speaker addresses himself. This flapper is likewise -employed diligently to attend his master in his walks, and upon occasion -to give him a soft flap on his eyes; because he is always so wrapped -up in cogitation, that he is in manifest danger of falling down every -precipice, and bouncing his head against every post; and in the streets, -of jostling others or being jostled himself into the kennel. - -It was necessary to give the reader this information, without which he -would be at the same loss with me to understand the proceedings of these -people, as they conducted me up the stairs to the top of the island, and -thence to the royal palace. While we were ascending they forgot several -times what they were about, and left me to myself, till their memories -were again roused by their flappers: for they appeared altogether unmoved -by the sight of my foreign habit and countenance, and by the shouts of -the vulgar, whose thoughts and minds were more disengaged. - -At last we entered the palace, and proceeded into the chamber of -presence, where I saw the king seated on his throne, attended on each -side by persons of prime quality. Before the throne was a large table -filled with globes and spheres, and mathematical instruments of all -kinds. His majesty took not the least notice of us, although our -entrance was not without sufficient noise, by the concourse of all -persons belonging to the court. But he was then deep in a problem; and -we attended at least an hour, before he could solve it. There stood by -him on each side a young page, with flaps in their hands, and when they -saw he was at leisure, one of them gently struck his mouth, and the other -his right ear; at which he started like one awaked on the sudden, and -looking towards me and the company I was in, recollected the occasion of -our coming, whereof he had been informed before. He spoke some words, -whereupon immediately a young man with a flap came up to my side, and -flapped me gently on the right ear; but I made signs, as well as I could, -that I had no occasion for such an instrument; which, as I afterwards -found, gave his majesty and the whole court a very mean opinion of my -understanding. The king, as far as I could conjecture, asked me several -questions, and I addressed myself to him in all the languages I had. When -it was found that I could neither understand nor be understood, I was -conducted by the king’s order to an apartment in his palace (this prince -being distinguished above all his predecessors for his hospitality to -strangers), where two servants were appointed to attend me. My dinner -was brought, and four persons of quality, whom I remembered to have -seen very near the king’s person, did me the honor to dine with me. We -had two courses of three dishes each. In the first course, there was a -shoulder of mutton cut into an equilateral triangle, a piece of beef -into a rhomboid, and a pudding into a cycloid. The second course was two -ducks trussed up in the form of fiddles; sausages and puddings resembling -flutes and hautboys, and a breast of veal in the shape of a harp. The -servants cut our bread into cones, cylinders, parallelograms, and several -other mathematical figures. - -While we were at dinner, I made bold to ask the names of several things -in their language, and those noble persons, by the assistance of their -flappers, delighted to give me answers, hoping to raise my admiration of -their great abilities, if I could be brought to converse with them. I was -soon able to call for bread and drink, or whatever else I wanted. - -After dinner my company withdrew, and a person was sent to me by the -king’s order, attended by a flapper. He brought with him pen, ink, and -paper, and three or four books, giving me to understand by signs that -he was sent to teach me the language. We sat together four hours, in -which time I wrote down a great number of words in columns, with the -translations over against them; I likewise made a shift to learn several -short sentences, for my tutor would order one of my servants to fetch -something, to turn about, to make a bow, to sit, or stand, or walk, -and the like. Then I took down the sentence in writing. He showed me -also, in one of his books, the figures of the sun, moon, and stars, the -zodiac, the tropics, and polar circles, together with the denominations -of many planes and solids. He gave me the names and descriptions of all -the musical instruments, and the general terms of art in playing on -each of them. After he had left me, I placed all my words, with their -interpretations, in alphabetical order. And thus, in a few days, by the -help of a very faithful memory, I got some insight into their language. - -The word which I interpret the Flying or Floating Island, is in the -original _Laputa_, whereof I could never learn the true etymology. _Lap_, -in the old obsolete language, signifies high; and _untuh_, a governor; -from which they say, by corruption, was derived _Laputa_ from _Lapuntah_. -But I do not approve of this derivation, which seems to be a little -strained. I ventured to offer to the learned among them a conjecture of -my own, that Laputa was _quasi lap outed_; _lap_, signifying properly the -dancing of the sunbeams in the sea, and _outed_, a wing; which, however, -I shall not obtrude, but submit to the judicious reader. - -Those to whom the king had intrusted me, observing how ill I was clad, -ordered a tailor to come next morning, and take my measure for a suit of -clothes. This operator did his office after a different manner from those -of his trade in Europe. He first took my altitude by a quadrant, and -then, with rule and compasses, described the dimensions and outlines of -my whole body, all which he entered upon paper; and in six days brought -my clothes very ill made, and quite out of shape, by happening to mistake -a figure in the calculation. But my comfort was, that I observed such -accidents very frequent, and little regarded. - -During my confinement for want of clothes, and by an indisposition that -held me some days longer, I much enlarged my dictionary; and when I went -next to court, was able to understand many things the king spoke, and -to return him some kind of answers. His majesty had given orders that -the island should move northeast-and-by-east to the vertical point over -Lagado, the metropolis of the whole kingdom below, upon the firm earth. -It was about ninety leagues distant, and our voyage lasted four days and -a half. I was not in the least sensible of the progressive motion made -in the air by the island. On the second morning, about eleven o’clock, -the king himself in person, attended by his nobility, courtiers, and -officers, having prepared all their musical instruments, played on them -for three hours without intermission, so that I was quite stunned with -the noise; neither could I possibly guess the meaning till my tutor -informed me. He said that the people of their island had their ears -adapted to hear the music of the spheres, which always played at certain -periods, and the court was now prepared to bear their part, in whatever -instrument they most excelled. - -In our journey towards Lagado, the capital city, his majesty ordered -that the island should stop over certain towns and villages, whence he -might receive the petitions of his subjects. And to this purpose several -packthreads were let down, with small weights at the bottom. On these -packthreads the people strung their petitions, which mounted up directly, -like the scraps of paper fastened by schoolboys at the end of the string -that holds their kite. Sometimes we received wine and victuals from -below, which were drawn up by pulleys. - -The knowledge I had in mathematics gave me great assistance in acquiring -their phraseology, which depended much upon that science and music; and -in the latter I was not unskilled. Their ideas are perpetually conversant -in lines and figures. If they would, for example, praise the beauty -of a woman or any other animal, they describe it by rhombs, circles, -parallelograms, ellipses, and other geometrical terms, or by words of -art drawn from music, needless here to repeat. I observed in the king’s -kitchen all sorts of mathematical and musical instruments, after the -figures of which they cut up the joints that were served to his majesty’s -table. - -Their houses are very ill-built, the walls bevel, without one right -angle in any apartment; and this defect arises from the contempt they -bear to practical geometry, which they despise as vulgar and mechanic; -those instructions they give being too refined for the intellects of -their workmen, which occasions perpetual mistakes. And although they are -dexterous enough upon a piece of paper, in the management of the rule, -the pencil, and the divider, yet in the common actions and behavior of -life, I have not seen a more clumsy, awkward, and unhandy people, nor -so slow and perplexed in their conceptions upon all other subjects, -except those of mathematics and music. They are very bad reasoners, -and vehemently given to opposition, unless when they happen to be of -the right opinion, which is seldom their case. Imagination, fancy, and -invention they are wholly strangers to, nor have any words in their -language by which those ideas can be expressed; the whole compass of -their thoughts and mind being shut up within the two forementioned -sciences. - -Most of them, and especially those who deal in the astronomical part, -have great faith in judicial astrology, although they are ashamed to -own it publicly. But what I chiefly admired, and thought altogether -unaccountable, was the strong disposition I observed in them towards news -and politics, perpetually inquiring into public affairs, giving their -judgments in matters of state, and passionately disputing every inch of -a party opinion. I have indeed observed the same disposition among most -of the mathematicians I have known in Europe, although I could never -discover the least analogy between the two sciences; unless those people -suppose, that because the smallest circle has as many degrees as the -largest, therefore the regulation and management of the world require no -more abilities than the handling and turning of a globe; but I rather -take this quality to spring from a very common infirmity of human nature, -inclining us to be more curious and conceited in matters where we have -least concern, and for which we are at least adapted either by study or -nature. - -[Illustration: “_At last we entered the palace_” - -_Page 177_] - -These people are under continual disquietudes, never enjoying a minute’s -peace of mind; and their disturbances proceed from causes which very -little affect the rest of mortals. Their apprehensions arise from several -changes they dread in the celestial bodies: for instance, that the -earth, by the continual approaches of the sun towards it, must in course -of time be absorbed or swallowed up; that the face of the sun will by -degrees be incrusted with its own effluvia, and give no more light to -the world; that the earth very narrowly escaped a brush from the tail -of the last comet, which would have infallibly reduced it to ashes; and -that the next, which they have calculated for one-and-thirty years hence, -will probably destroy us. For if, in its perihelion, it should approach -within a certain degree of the sun (as by their calculations they have -reason to dread), it will conceive a degree of heat ten thousand times -more intense than that of red-hot glowing iron; and, in its absence -from the sun, carry a blazing tail ten hundred thousand and fourteen -miles long, through which if the earth should pass at the distance of -one hundred thousand miles from the nucleus or main body of the comet, -it must in its passage be set on fire, and reduced to ashes; that the -sun, daily spending its rays without any nutriment to supply them, will -at last be wholly consumed and annihilated; which must be attended with -the destruction of this earth, and of all the planets that receive their -light from it. - -They are so perpetually alarmed with the apprehensions of these and the -like impending dangers, that they can neither sleep quietly in their -beds, nor have any relish for the common pleasures or amusements of -life. When they meet an acquaintance in the morning, the first question -is about the sun’s health; how he looked at his setting and rising, -and what hopes they have to avoid the stroke of the approaching comet. -This conversation they are apt to run into with the same temper that -boys discover in delighting to hear terrible stories of sprites and -hobgoblins, which they greedily listen to, and dare not go to bed for -fear. - -The women of the island have abundance of vivacity; they contemn their -husbands, and are exceedingly fond of strangers, whereof there is always -a considerable number from the continent below, attending at court, -either upon affairs of the several towns and corporations, or their -own particular occasions, but are much despised, because they want the -same endowments. Among these the ladies choose their gallants. But the -vexation is, that they act with too much ease and security; for the -husband is always so wrapped in speculation, that the mistress and lover -may proceed to the greatest familiarities before his face, if he be but -provided with paper and implements, and without his flapper at his side. - -The wives and daughters lament their confinement to the island, although -I think it the most delicious spot of ground in the world: and although -they live here in the greatest plenty and magnificence, and are allowed -to do whatever they please, they long to see the world, and take the -diversions of the metropolis; which they are not allowed to do without a -particular license from the king; and this is not easy to be obtained, -because the people of quality have found, by frequent experience, how -hard it is to persuade their women to return from below. I was told that -a great court lady, who had several children, is married to the prime -minister (the richest subject in the kingdom, a very graceful person, -extremely fond of her) and lives in the finest palace in the island, went -down to Lagado, on the pretense of health, there hid herself for several -months, till the king sent a warrant to search for her, and she was found -in an obscure eating house all in rags, having pawned her clothes to -maintain an old deformed footman, who beat her every day, and in whose -company she was taken, much against her will. And although her husband -received her with all possible kindness, and without the least reproach, -she soon after contrived to steal down again with all her jewels, to the -same gallant, and has not been heard of since. - -This may perhaps pass with the reader rather for a European or English -story, than for one of a country so remote. But he may please to -consider, that the caprices of womankind are not limited by any climate -or nation, and that they are much more uniform than can be easily -imagined. - -In about a month’s time I had made a tolerable proficiency in their -language, and was able to answer most of the king’s questions, when I had -the honor to attend him. His majesty discovered not the least curiosity -to inquire into the laws, government, history, religion, or manners of -the countries where I had been; but confined his questions to the state -of mathematics, and received the account I gave him with great contempt -and indifference, though often roused by his flapper on each side. - - - - -CHAPTER III - - A PHENOMENON SOLVED BY MODERN PHILOSOPHY AND ASTRONOMY—THE - LAPUTIANS’ GREAT IMPROVEMENTS IN THE LATTER—THE KING’S METHOD - OF SUPPRESSING INSURRECTIONS. - - -I desired leave of this prince to see the curiosities of the island, -which he was graciously pleased to grant, and ordered my tutor to attend -me. I chiefly wanted to know to what cause in art or in nature it owed -its several motions, whereof I will now give a philosophical account to -the reader. - -The flying or floating island is exactly circular, its diameter 7837 -yards, or about four miles and a half, and consequently contains ten -thousand acres. It is three hundred yards thick. The bottom or under -surface, which appears to those who view it from below, is one even -regular plate of adamant, shooting up to the height of about two hundred -yards. Above it lie the several minerals in their usual order, and over -all is a coat of rich mold, ten or twelve feet deep. This declivity of -the upper surface, from the circumference to the center, is the natural -cause why all the dews and rains which fall upon the island are conveyed -in small rivulets towards the middle, where they are emptied into four -large basins, each of about half a mile in circuit, and two hundred yards -distant from the center. From these basins the water is continually -exhaled by the sun in the daytime, which effectually prevents their -overflowing. Besides, as it is in the power of the monarch to raise the -island above the region of clouds and vapors, he can prevent the falling -of dews and rains whenever he pleases. For the highest clouds cannot -rise above two miles, as naturalists agree; at least they were never -known to do so in that country. - -At the center of the island there is a chasm about fifty yards in -diameter, whence the astronomers descend into a large dome, which is -therefore called _flandona gagnole_, or the Astronomer’s Cave, situated -at the depth of a hundred yards beneath the upper surface of the -adamant. In this cave are twenty lamps continually burning, which from -the reflection of the adamant cast a strong light into every part. The -place is stored with great variety of sextants, quadrants, telescopes, -astrolabes, and other astronomical instruments. But the greatest -curiosity, upon which the fate of the island depends, is a loadstone of a -prodigious size, in shape resembling a weaver’s shuttle. It is in length -six yards, and in the thickest part at least three yards over. This -magnet is sustained by a very strong axle of adamant passing through its -middle, upon which it plays, and is poised so exactly that the weakest -hand can turn it. It is hooped round with a hollow cylinder of adamant, -four feet deep, as many thick, and twelve yards in diameter, placed -horizontally, and supported by eight adamantine feet, each six yards -high. In the middle of the concave side there is a groove twelve inches -deep, in which the extremities of the axle are lodged, and turned round -as there is occasion. - -The stone cannot be moved from its place by any force, because the hoop -and its feet are one continued piece with that body of adamant which -constitutes the bottom of the island. - -By means of this loadstone, the island is made to rise and fall, and -move from one place to another. For, with respect to that part of the -earth over which the monarch presides, the stone is indued at one of -its sides with an attractive power, and at the other with a repulsive. -Upon placing the magnet erect, with its attracting end toward the earth, -the island descends; but when the repelling extremity points downwards, -the island mounts directly upwards. When the position of the stone is -oblique, the motion of the island is so too: for in this magnet the -forces always act in lines parallel to its direction. - -[Illustration] - -By this oblique motion the island is conveyed to different parts of the -monarch’s dominions. To explain the manner of its progress, let _A B_ -represent a line drawn across the dominions of Balnibarbi. Let the line -_c d_ represent the loadstone, of which let _d_ be the repelling end -and _c_ the attracting end, the island being over _C_; let the stone be -placed in the position _c d_, with its repelling end downwards; then the -island will be driven upwards obliquely towards _D_. When it is arrived -at _D_, let the stone be turned upon its axle till its attracting end -points towards _E_, and then the island will be carried obliquely towards -_E_; where, if the stone be again turned upon its axle till it stands -in the position _E F_, with its repelling point downwards, the island -will rise obliquely towards _F_, where, by directing the attracting end -towards _G_, the island may be carried to _G_, and from _G_ to _H_, by -turning the stone so as to make its repelling extremity point directly -downwards. And thus by changing the situation of the stone as often as -there is occasion, the island is made to rise and fall by turns in an -oblique direction, and by those alternate risings and fallings (the -obliquity being not considerable) is conveyed from one part of the -dominions to the other. - -But it must be observed, that this island cannot move beyond the extent -of the dominions below, nor can it rise above the height of four miles. -For which the astronomers (who have written large systems concerning the -stone) assign the following reason: that the magnetic virtue does not -extend beyond the distance of four miles, and that the mineral which -acts upon the stone in the bowels of the earth, and in the sea about six -leagues distant from the shore, is not diffused through the whole globe, -but terminated with the limits of the king’s dominions; and it was easy, -from the great advantage of such a superior situation, for a prince to -bring under his obedience whatever country lay within the attraction of -that magnet. - -When the stone is put parallel to the plane of the horizon, the island -stands still; for in that case, the extremities of it being at equal -distance from the earth, act with equal force, the one in drawing -downwards, the other in pushing upwards, and consequently no motion can -insue. - -This loadstone is under the care of certain astronomers, who from time -to time give it such positions as the monarch directs. They spend the -greatest part of their lives in observing the celestial bodies, which -they do by the assistance of glasses far excelling ours in goodness. This -advantage has enabled them to extend their discoveries much farther than -our astronomers in Europe; for they have made a catalogue of ten thousand -fixed stars, whereas the largest of ours do not contain above one-third -part of that number. They have likewise discovered two lesser stars, or -satellites, which revolve about Mars; whereof the innermost is distant -from the center of the primary planet exactly three of the diameters, -and the outermost, five; the former revolves in the space of ten hours, -and the latter in twenty-one and a half; so that the squares of their -periodical times are very near in the same proportion with the cubes of -their distance from the center of Mars; which evidently shows them to -be governed by the same law of gravitation that influences the other -heavenly bodies. - -They have observed ninety-three different comets, and settled their -periods with great exactness. If this be true (and they affirm it with -great confidence), it is much to be wished that their observations were -made public, whereby the theory of comets, which at present is very lame -and defective, might be brought to the same perfection with other parts -of astronomy. - -The king would be the most absolute prince in the universe, if he -could but prevail on a ministry to join with him; but these, having -their estates below on the continent, and considering that the office -of a favorite has a very uncertain tenure, would never consent to the -enslaving their country. - -If any town should engage in rebellion or mutiny, fall into violent -factions, or refuse to pay the usual tribute, the king has two methods -of reducing them to obedience. The first and the mildest course is by -keeping the island hovering over such a town, and the lands about it, -whereby he can deprive them of the benefit of the sun and the rain, and -consequently afflict the inhabitants with dearth and diseases and if -the crime deserve it, they are at the same time pelted from above with -great stones, against which they have no defense but by creeping into -cellars or caves, while the roofs of their houses are beaten to pieces. -But if they still continue obstinate, or offer to raise insurrections, -he proceeds to the last remedy, by letting the island drop directly -upon their heads, which makes a universal destruction both of houses -and men. However, this is an extremity to which the prince is seldom -driven, neither indeed is he willing to put it in execution; nor dare his -ministers advise him to an action, which, as it would render them odious -to the people, so it would be a great damage to their own estates, which -lie all below, for the island is the king’s demesne. - -But there is still indeed a more weighty reason, why the kings of this -country have been always averse from executing so terrible an action, -unless upon the utmost necessity. For if the town intended to be -destroyed should have in it any tall rocks, as it generally falls out in -the larger cities, a situation probably chosen at first with a view to -prevent such a catastrophe; or if it abound in high spires or pillars -of stone, a sudden fall might endanger the bottom or under surface of -the island, which, although it consists, as I have said, of one entire -adamant, two hundred yards thick, might happen to crack by too great a -shock, or burst by approaching too near the fires from the houses below, -as the backs, both of iron and stone, will often do in our chimneys. Of -all this the people are well apprised, and understand how far to carry -their obstinacy, where their liberty or property is concerned. And the -king, when he is highest provoked, and most determined to press a city -to rubbish, orders the island to descend with great gentleness, out of -a pretense of tenderness to his people, but indeed for fear of breaking -the adamantine bottom; in which case, it is the opinion of all their -philosophers, that the loadstone could no longer hold it up, and the -whole mass would fall to the ground. - -By a fundamental law of this realm, neither the king nor either of his -two elder sons are permitted to leave the island; nor the queen, till she -is past childbearing. - - - - -CHAPTER IV - - THE AUTHOR LEAVES LAPUTA—IS CONVEYED TO BALNIBARBI—ARRIVES AT - THE METROPOLIS—A DESCRIPTION OF THE METROPOLIS AND THE COUNTRY - ADJOINING—THE AUTHOR HOSPITABLY RECEIVED BY A GREAT LORD—HIS - CONVERSATION WITH THAT LORD. - - -Although I cannot say that I was ill-treated in this island, yet I must -confess I thought myself too much neglected, not without some degree of -contempt; for neither prince nor people appeared to be curious in any -part of knowledge, except mathematics and music, wherein I was far their -inferior, and upon that account very little regarded. - -On the other side, after having seen all the curiosities of the island, -I was very desirous to leave it, being heartily weary of those people. -They were indeed excellent in two sciences for which I have great esteem, -and wherein I am not unversed; but at the same time so abstracted -and involved in speculation that I never met with such disagreeable -companions. I conversed only with women, tradesmen, flappers, and court -pages, during two months of my abode there, by which at last I rendered -myself extremely contemptible; yet these were the only people from whom I -could ever receive a reasonable answer. - -I had obtained, by hard study, a good degree of knowledge in their -language; I was weary of being confined to an island where I received so -little countenance, and resolved to leave it with the first opportunity. - -There was a great lord at court, nearly related to the king, and for -that reason alone used with respect. He was universally reckoned the -most ignorant and stupid person among them. He had performed many -eminent services for the crown, had great natural and acquired parts, -adorned with integrity and honor; but so ill an ear for music, that his -detractors reported he had been often known to beat time in the wrong -place; neither could his tutors without extreme difficulty teach him to -demonstrate the most easy proposition in mathematics. He was pleased to -show me many marks of favor, often did me the honor of a visit, desired -to be informed in the affairs of Europe, the laws and customs, the -manners and learning of the several countries where I had traveled. He -listened to me with great attention, and made very wise observations on -all I spoke. He had two flappers attending him for state, but never made -use of them, except at court and in visits of ceremony; and would always -command them to withdraw when we were alone together. - -I entreated this illustrious person to intercede in my behalf with his -majesty for leave to depart; which he accordingly did, as he was pleased -to tell me, with regret; for indeed he had made me several offers, very -advantageous, which, however, I refused, with expressions of the highest -acknowledgment. - -On the 16th day of February I took leave of his majesty and the court. -The king made me a present to the value of about two hundred pounds -English, and my protector his kinsman as much more, together with a -letter of recommendation to a friend of his in Lagado, the metropolis; -the island being then hovering over a mountain about two miles from it, -I was let down from the lowest gallery, in the same manner as I had been -taken up. - -The continent, as far as it is subject to the monarch of the flying -island, passes under the general name of Balnibarbi; and the metropolis, -as I said before, is called Lagado. I felt some little satisfaction in -finding myself on firm ground. I walked to the city without any concern, -being clad like one of the natives, and sufficiently instructed to -converse with them. I soon found out the person’s house to whom I was -recommended, presented my letter from his friend the grandee in the -island, and was received with much kindness. This great lord, whose name -was Munodi, ordered me an apartment in his own house, where I continued -during my stay, and was entertained in a most hospitable manner. - -The next morning after my arrival he took me in his chariot to see the -town, which is about half the bigness of London, but the houses very -strangely built, and most of them out of repair. The people in the -streets walked fast, looked wild, their eyes fixed, and were generally in -rags. We passed through one of the town gates, and went about three miles -into the country, where I saw many laborers working with several sorts of -tools in the ground, but was not able to conjecture what they were about; -neither did I observe any expectation either of corn or grass, although -the soil appeared to be excellent. I could not forbear admiring at these -odd appearances, both in town and country; and I made bold to desire my -conductor that he would be pleased to explain to me what could be meant -by so many busy heads, hands, and faces, both in the streets and the -fields, because I did not discover any good effects they produced; but -on the contrary, I never knew a soil so unhappily cultivated, houses so -ill-contrived and so ruinous, or a people whose countenances and habit -expressed so much misery and want. - -This Lord Munodi was a person of the first rank, and had been some -years governor of Lagado; but by a cabal of ministers was discharged -for insufficiency. However, the king treated him with tenderness, as a -well-meaning man, but of a low contemptible understanding. - -When I gave that free censure of the country and its inhabitants, he -made no further answer than by telling me that I had not been long -enough among them to form a judgment; and that the different nations of -the world had different customs, with other common topics to the same -purpose. But when we returned to his palace, he asked me how I liked -the building, what absurdities I observed, and what quarrel I had with -the dress and looks of his domestics. This he might safely do, because -everything about him was magnificent, regular, and polite. I answered -that his excellency’s prudence, quality, and fortune had exempted him -from those defects which folly and beggary had produced in others. He -said if I would go with him to his country house, about twenty miles -distant, where his estate lay, there would be more leisure for this -kind of conversation. I told his excellency that I was entirely at his -disposal, and accordingly we set out next morning. - -During our journey he made me observe the several methods used by farmers -in managing their lands, which to me were wholly unaccountable; for, -except in some very few places, I could not discover one ear of corn or -blade of grass. But, in three hours’ traveling, the scene was wholly -altered; we came into a most beautiful country; farmers’ houses at small -distances, neatly built; the fields enclosed, containing vineyards, -corn-grounds and meadows. Neither do I remember to have seen a more -delightful prospect. His excellency observed my countenance to clear up; -he told me with a sigh that there his estate began, and would continue -the same till we should come to his house; that his countrymen ridiculed -and despised him for managing his affairs no better, and for setting so -ill an example to the kingdom, which however was followed by very few, -such as were old and willful and weak, like himself. - -We came at length to the house, which was indeed a noble structure, built -according to the best rules of ancient architecture. The fountains, -gardens, walks, avenues, and groves, were all disposed with exact -judgment and taste. I gave due praises to everything I saw, whereof his -excellency took not the least notice till after supper; when, there being -no third companion, he told me with a melancholy air, that he doubted -he must throw down his houses in town and country, to rebuild them -after the present mode, destroy all his plantations, and cast others in -such a form as modern usage required, and give the same directions to -all his tenants, unless he would submit to incur the censure of pride, -singularity, affectation, ignorance, caprice, and perhaps increase his -majesty’s displeasure. - -That the admiration I appeared to be under would cease or diminish when -he had informed me of some particulars which probably I never heard -of at court, the people there being too much taken up in their own -speculations, to have regard to what passed here below. - -The sum of his discourse was to this effect: That about forty years ago, -certain persons went up to Laputa, either upon business or diversion, -and after five months’ continuance, came back with a very little -smattering in mathematics, but full of volatile spirits acquired in that -airy region. That these persons upon their return began to dislike -the management of everything below, and fell into schemes of putting -all arts, sciences, languages, and mechanics upon a new foot. To this -end they procured a royal patent for erecting an academy of projectors -in Lagado; and the humor prevailed so strongly among the people, that -there is not a town of any consequence in the kingdom without such an -academy. In these colleges the professors contrive new rules and methods -of agriculture and building, and new instruments and tools for all trades -and manufactures; whereby, as they undertake, one man shall do the work -of ten; a palace may be built in a week, of materials so durable as to -last forever without repairing; all the fruits of the earth shall come -to maturity at whatever season we think fit to choose, and increase a -hundredfold more than they do at present, with innumerable other happy -proposals. The only inconvenience is, that none of these projects are -yet brought to perfection; and in the meantime, the whole country lies -miserably waste, the houses in ruins, and the people without food or -clothes. By all which, instead of being discouraged, they are fifty times -more violently bent upon prosecuting their schemes, driven equally on -by hope and despair; that as for himself, being not of an enterprising -spirit, he was content to go on in the old forms, to live in the houses -his ancestors had built, and act as they did in every part of life -without innovation; that some few other persons of quality and gentry had -done the same, but were looked on with an eye of contempt and ill will, -as enemies to art, ignorant, and ill commonwealthsmen, preferring their -own ease and sloth before the general improvement of their country. - -His lordship added that he would not by any further particulars prevent -the pleasure I should certainly take in viewing the grand academy, -whither he was resolved I should go. He only desired me to observe a -ruined building upon the side of a mountain about three miles distant, -of which he gave me this account. That he had a very convenient mill -within half a mile of his house, turned by a current from a large river, -and sufficient for his own family as well as a great number of his -tenants; that about seven years ago a club of these projectors came to -him with proposals to destroy this mill, and build another on the side -of that mountain, on the long ridge whereof a long canal must be cut for -a repository of water, to be conveyed up by pipes and engines to supply -the mill; because the wind and air upon a height agitated the water, and -thereby made it fitter for motion; and because the water, descending a -declivity, would turn the mill with half the current of a river whose -course is more upon a level. He said that being then not very well with -the court, and pressed by many of his friends, he complied with the -proposal; and after employing a hundred men for two years, the work -miscarried, the projectors went off, laying the blame entirely upon him, -railing at him ever since, and putting others upon the same experiment, -with equal assurance of success, as well as equal disappointment. - -In a few days we came back to town; and his excellency, considering the -bad character he had in the academy, would not go with me himself, but -recommended me to a friend of his to bear me company thither. My lord was -pleased to represent me as a great admirer of projects, and a person of -much curiosity and easy belief; which indeed was not without truth, for I -had myself been a sort of projector in my younger days. - - - - -CHAPTER V - - THE AUTHOR PERMITTED TO SEE THE GRAND ACADEMY OF LAGADO—THE - ACADEMY LARGELY DESCRIBED—THE ARTS WHEREIN THE PROFESSORS - EMPLOY THEMSELVES. - - -This academy is not an entire single building, but a continuation of -several houses on both sides of a street which, growing waste, was -purchased and applied to that use. - -I was received very kindly by the warden, and went for many days to the -academy. Every room has in it one or more projectors; and I believe I -could not be in fewer than five hundred rooms. - -The first man I saw was of a meager aspect, with sooty hands and face, -his hair and beard long, ragged, and singed in several places. His -clothes, shirt, and skin were all of the same color. He had been eight -years upon a project for extracting sunbeams out of cucumbers, which were -to be put into phials hermetically sealed, and let out to warm the air in -raw inclement summers. He told me, he did not doubt in eight years more -he should be able to supply the governor’s gardens with sunshine at a -reasonable rate; but he complained that his stock was low, and entreated -me to give him something as an encouragement to ingenuity, especially -since this had been a very dear season for cucumbers. I made him a small -present, for my lord had furnished me with money on purpose, because he -knew their practice of begging from all who go to see them. - -I saw one at work to calcine ice into gunpowder, who likewise showed me -a treatise he had written concerning the malleability of fire, which he -intended to publish. - -There was a most ingenious architect who had contrived a new method for -building houses, by beginning at the roof and working downwards to the -foundation; which he justified to me by the like practice of those two -prudent insects the bee and the spider. - -There was a man born blind, who had several apprentices in his own -condition; their employment was to mix colors for painters, which their -master taught them to distinguish by feeling and smelling. It was indeed -my misfortune to find them at that time not very perfect in their -lessons, and the professor himself happened to be generally mistaken. -This artist is much encouraged and esteemed by the whole fraternity. - -In another apartment, I was highly pleased with a projector who had -found a device of ploughing the ground with hogs, to save the charges -of ploughs, cattle, and labor. The method is this: In an acre of ground -you bury at six inches’ distance, and eight deep, a quantity of acorns, -dates, chestnuts, and other mast or vegetables whereof these animals are -fondest; then you drive six hundred or more of them into the field, where -in a few days they will root up the whole ground in search of their food, -and make it fit for sowing, at the same time manuring it with their dung; -it is true upon experiment they found the charge and trouble very great, -and they had little or no crop. However, it is not doubted that this -invention may be capable of great improvement. - -I went into another room, where the walls and ceiling were all hung round -with cobwebs, except a narrow passage for the artist to go in and out. At -my entrance, he called aloud to me not to disturb his webs. He lamented -the fatal mistake the world had been so long in of using silkworms, -while he had such plenty of domestic insects who infinitely excelled the -former, because they understood how to weave as well as spin. And he -proposed further, that by employing spiders, the charge of dyeing silks -should be wholly saved; whereof I was fully convinced when he showed me -a vast number of flies most beautifully colored, wherewith he fed his -spiders, assuring us that the webs would take a tincture from them; and -as he had them of all hues, he hoped to fit everybody’s fancy, as soon as -he could find proper food for the flies, of certain gums, oils, and other -glutinous matter, to give a strength and consistence to the threads. - -There was an astronomer who had undertaken to place a sundial upon the -great weathercock on the townhouse, by adjusting the annual and diurnal -motions of the earth and sun, so as to answer and coincide with all -accidental turnings by the wind. - -I visited many other apartments, but shall not trouble my reader with all -the curiosities I observed, being studious of brevity. - -I had hitherto seen only one side of the academy, the other being -appropriated to the advancers of speculative learning, of whom I shall -say something when I have mentioned one illustrious person more, who is -called among them “the universal artist.” He told us he had been thirty -years employing his thoughts for the improvement of human life. He had -two large rooms full of wonderful curiosities, and fifty men at work. -Some were condensing air into a dry tangible substance, by extracting -the niter, and letting the aqueous or fluid particles percolate; others -softening marble for pillows and pincushions; others petrifying the hoofs -of a living horse to preserve them from foundering. The artist himself -was at that time busy upon two great designs; the first to sow land with -chaff, wherein he affirmed the true seminal virtue to be contained, as he -demonstrated by several experiments which I was not skillful enough to -comprehend. The other was, by a certain composition of gums, minerals, -and vegetables, outwardly applied, to prevent the growth of wool upon two -young lambs; and he hoped in a reasonable time to propagate the breed of -naked sheep all over the kingdom. - -We crossed a walk to the other part of the academy, where, as I have -already said, the projector in speculative learning resided. - -The first professor I saw was in a very large room, with forty pupils -about him. After salutation, observing me to look earnestly upon a frame, -which took up the greatest part of both the length and breadth of the -room, he said perhaps I might wonder to see him employed in a project for -improving speculative knowledge by practical and mechanical operations. -But the world would soon be sensible of its usefulness, and he flattered -himself that a more noble exalted thought never sprang in any other man’s -head. Every one knew how laborious the usual method is of attaining to -arts and sciences; whereas by his contrivance the most ignorant person, -at a reasonable charge, and with a little bodily labor, may write books -in philosophy, poetry, politics, law, mathematics, and theology, without -the least assistance from genius or study. He then led me to the frame, -about the sides whereof all his pupils stood in ranks. It was twenty feet -square, placed in the middle of the room. The superficies was composed of -several bits of wood, about the bigness of a die, but some larger than -others. They were all linked together by slender wires. These bits of -wood were covered on every square with paper pasted on them; and on these -papers were written all the words of their language in their several -moods, tenses, and declensions, but without any order. The professor then -desired me to observe, for he was going to set his engine at work. The -pupils, at his command, took each of them hold of an iron handle, whereof -there were forty fixed round the edges of the frame, and giving them a -sudden turn, the whole disposition of the words was entirely changed. -He then commanded six-and-thirty of the lads to read the several lines -softly as they appeared upon the frame; and where they found three or -four words together that might make part of a sentence, they dictated to -the four remaining boys, who were scribes. This work was repeated three -or four times; and at every turn the engine was so contrived, that the -words shifted into new places, as the square bits of wood moved upside -down. - -Six hours a day the young students were employed in this labor; and the -professor showed me several volumes in large folio, already collected, -of broken sentences, which he intended to piece together, and out of -those rich materials to give the world a complete body of all arts and -sciences; which, however, might be still improved, and much expedited, if -the public would raise a fund for making and employing five hundred such -frames in Lagado, and oblige the managers to contribute in common their -several collections. - -He assured me that this invention had employed all his thoughts from his -youth; that he had employed the whole vocabulary into his frame, and -made the strictest computation of the general proportion there is in -books between the numbers of particles, nouns, and verbs, and other parts -of speech. - -I made my humblest acknowledgment to this illustrious person for his -great communicativeness, and promised if ever I had the good fortune to -return to my native country, that I would do him justice, as the sole -inventor of this wonderful machine, the form and contrivance of which I -desired leave to delineate upon paper. I told him, although it were the -custom of our learned in Europe to steal inventions from each other, who -had thereby at least this advantage, that it became a controversy which -was the right owner yet I would take such caution, that he should have -the honor entire, without a rival. - -We next went to the school of language, where three professors sat in -consultation upon improving that of their own country. - -[Illustration: “_He had been eight years upon a project for extracting -sunbeams out of cucumbers_” - -_Page 201_] - -The first project was to shorten discourse by cutting polysyllables into -one, and leaving out verbs and participles; because in reality all things -imaginable are but nouns. - -The other was a scheme for entirely abolishing all words whatsoever; -and this was urged as a great advantage in point of health as well as -brevity. For it is plain, that every word we speak is in some degree a -diminution of our lungs by corrosion, and consequently contributes to -the shortening of our lives. An expedient was therefore offered, that -since words are only names for things, it would be more convenient for -all men to carry about them such things as were necessary to express the -particular business they are to discourse on. And this invention would -certainly have taken place, to the great ease as well as health of the -subject, if the women, in conjunction with the vulgar and illiterate, -had not threatened to raise a rebellion unless they might be allowed the -liberty to speak with their tongues, after the manner of their ancestors; -such constant irreconcilable enemies to science are the common people. -However, many of the most learned and wise adhere to the new scheme -of expressing themselves by things; which has only this inconvenience -attending it, that if a man’s business be very great, and of various -kinds, he must be obliged in proportion to carry a greater bundle of -things upon his back, unless he can afford one or two strong servants -to attend him. I have often beheld two of those sages almost sinking -under the weight of their packs, like peddlers among us; who when they -met in the street would lay down their loads, open their sacks, and hold -conversation for an hour together; then put up their implements, help -each other to resume their burdens, and take their leave. - -But for short conversations a man may carry implements in his pockets and -under his arms, enough to supply him; and in his house he cannot be at -a loss. Therefore the room where company meet who practice this art, is -full of all things, ready at hand, requisite to furnish matter for this -kind of artificial converse. - -Another great advantage proposed by this invention was, that it would -serve as a universal language, to be understood in all civilized -nations, whose goods and utensils are generally of the same kind, or -nearly resembling, so that their uses might easily be comprehended. And -thus ambassadors would be qualified to treat with foreign princes, or -ministers of state, to whose tongues they were utter strangers. - -I was at the mathematical school, where the master taught his pupils -after a method scarce imaginable to us in Europe. The proposition and -demonstration were fairly written on a thin wafer, with ink composed -of cephalic tincture. This the student was to swallow upon a fasting -stomach, and for three days following eat nothing but bread and water. -As the wafer digested, the tincture mounted to his brain, bearing -the proposition along with it. But the success has not hitherto been -answerable, partly by some error in the _quantum_ or composition, and -partly by the perverseness of lads, to whom this bolus is so nauseous -that they generally steal aside and discharge it upwards before it -can operate; neither have they been yet persuaded to use so long an -abstinence as the prescription requires. - -[Illustration] - - - - -CHAPTER VI - - A FURTHER ACCOUNT OF THE ACADEMY—THE AUTHOR PROPOSES SOME - IMPROVEMENTS, WHICH ARE HONORABLY RECEIVED. - - -In the school of political projectors I was but ill entertained, the -professors appearing to me wholly out of their senses, which is a scene -that never fails to make me melancholy. These unhappy people were -proposing schemes for persuading monarchs to choose favorites upon the -score of their wisdom, capacity, and virtue; of teaching ministers to -consult the public good; of rewarding merit, great abilities, and eminent -services; of instructing princes to know their true interest by placing -it on the same foundation with that of their people; of choosing for -employments persons qualified to exercise them; with many other wild, -impossible chimeras, that never entered before into the heart of man -to conceive, and confirmed in me the old observation, that “there is -nothing so extravagant and irrational, which some philosophers have not -maintained for truth.” - -But, however, I shall so far do justice to this part of the academy, as -to acknowledge that all of them were not so visionary. There was a most -ingenious doctor who seemed to be perfectly versed in the whole nature -and system of government. This illustrious person had very usefully -employed his studies in finding out effectual remedies for all diseases -and corruptions to which the several kinds of public administration are -subject, by the vices or infirmities of those who govern, as well as -by the licentiousness of those who are to obey. For instance, whereas -all writers and reasoners have agreed that there is a strict universal -resemblance between the natural and the political body, can there be -anything more evident, than that the health of both must be preserved, -and the diseases cured by the same prescription? It is allowed, that -senates and great councils are often troubled with redundant, ebullient, -and other peccant humors; with many diseases of the head, and more of -the heart; with strong convulsions, with grievous contractions of the -nerves and sinews in both hands, but especially the right; with spleen, -flatus, vertigoes, and deliriums; with scrofulous tumors, full of fetid -purulent matter; with sour, frothy eructations; with canine appetites -and crudeness of digestion, besides many others, needless to mention. -This doctor therefore proposed that upon the meeting of a senate, certain -physicians should attend at the three first days of their sitting, and at -the close of each day’s debate feel the pulses of every senator; after -which, having maturely considered and consulted upon the nature of the -several maladies, and the methods of cure, they should on the fourth -day return to the senate house, attended by their apothecaries, stored -with proper, medicines, and before the members sat, administer to each -of them lenitives, aperitives, abstersives, corrosives, restringents, -palliatives, laxatives, cephalalgics, icterics, apophlegmatics, acoustics, -as their several cases required, and according as these medicines should -operate, repeat, alter, or omit them at the next meeting. - -This project could not be of any great expense to the public, and would -in my poor opinion be of much use for the dispatch of business, in those -countries where senates have any share in the legislative power, beget -unanimity, shorten debates, open a few mouths which are now closed, and -close many more which are now open; curb the petulancy of the young, and -correct the positiveness of the old; rouse the stupid, and damp the pert. - -Again, because it is a general complaint that the favorites of princes -are troubled with short and weak memories, the same doctor proposed that -whoever attended a first minister, after having told his business with -the utmost brevity and in the plainest words, should at his departure -give the said minister a tweak by the nose, or a kick in the belly, or -tread on his corns, or lug him thrice by both ears, or run a pin into his -breech, or pinch his arm black and blue, to prevent forgetfulness; and at -every levee day repeat the same operation, till the business were done or -absolutely refused. - -He likewise directed that every senator in the great council of a nation, -after he had delivered his opinion and argued in the defense of it, -should be obliged to give his vote directly contrary; because if that -were done, the result would infallibly terminate in the good of the -public. - -When parties in a state are violent, he offered a wonderful contrivance -to reconcile them. The method is this: You take a hundred leaders of each -party; you dispose them into couples of such whose heads are nearest of a -size; then let two nice operators saw off the occiput of each couple at -the same time, in such a manner that the brain may be equally divided. -Let the occiputs thus cut off be interchanged, applying each to the head -of his opposite party man. It seems indeed to be a work that requires -some exactness, but the professor assured us that if it were dexterously -performed, the cure would be infallible. For he argued thus: that the two -half brains being left to debate the matter between themselves within -the space of one skull, would soon come to a good understanding, and -produce that moderation, as well as regularity of thinking, so much to -be wished for in the heads of those who imagine they come into the world -only to watch and govern its motion; and as to the difference of brains, -in quantity or quality, among those who are directors in faction, the -doctor assured us, from his own knowledge, that it was a perfect trifle. - -I heard a very warm debate between two professors, about the most -commodious and effectual ways and means of raising money without grieving -the subject. The first affirmed, the justest method would be to lay a -certain tax upon vices and folly, and the sum fixed upon every man to be -rated after the fairest manner by a jury of his neighbors. The second -was of an opinion directly contrary: to tax those qualities of body and -mind for which men chiefly value themselves, the rate to be more or less -according to the degrees of excelling, the decision whereof should be -left entirely to their own breast. The highest tax was upon men who are -the greatest favorites of the other sex, and the assessments according -to the number and natures of the favors they have received; for which -they are allowed to be their own vouchers. Wit, valor, and politeness -were likewise proposed to be largely taxed, and collected in the same -manner, by every person’s giving his own word for the quantum of what he -possessed. But as to honor, justice, wisdom, and learning, they should -not be taxed at all, because they are qualifications of so singular a -kind, that no man will either allow them in his neighbor or value them in -himself. - -The women were proposed to be taxed according to their beauty and skill -in dressing, wherein they had the same privilege with the men, to be -determined by their own judgment. But constancy, chastity, good sense, -and good nature, were not rated, because they would not bear the charge -of collecting. - -To keep senators in the interest of the crown, it was proposed that the -members shall raffle for employments, every man first taking an oath, and -giving security that he would vote for the court, whether he won or no, -after which the losers had in their turn the liberty of raffling upon the -next vacancy. Thus hope and expectation would be kept alive; none would -complain of broken promises, but impute their disappointments wholly -to fortune, whose shoulders are broader and stronger than those of a -ministry. - -The whole discourse was written with great acuteness, containing many -observations both curious and useful for politicians, but as I conceived -not altogether complete. This I ventured to tell the author, and -offered if he pleased to supply him with some additions. He received my -proposition with more compliance than is usual among writers, especially -those of the projecting species, professing he would be glad to receive -further information. - -I told him that were I to live in a kingdom where the bulk of the people -indulged in plots and conspiracies, I would take care to encourage the -breed of discoverers, witnesses, informers, accusers, prosecutors, -evidences, swearers, together with their several subservient and -subaltern instruments, placing them all under the pay and the protection -of ministers of state or other powerful persons who desire to raise their -own characters as profound politicians. Men thus qualified and empowered -might restore new vigor to a crazy administration; stifle or divert -general discontents; fill their pockets with forfeitures, and advance -or sink the opinion of public credit, as either shall best answer their -private advantage. This might be done by first agreeing and settling -among themselves what suspected persons shall be accused of a plot; then, -effectual care being taken to secure all their letters and papers, and -the criminal placed in secure custody, these papers might be delivered -to a set of artists sufficiently dexterous to find out the mysterious -meanings of words, syllables, and letters. They should be allowed to -place what interpretation they please upon them, even if it is contrary -to their true intent and meaning; for instance, they may, if they so -fancy, interpret a sieve to signify a court lady; a lame dog, an invader; -the plague, a standing army; a buzzard, a great statesman; the gout, -a high priest; a broom, a revolution; a mouse-trap, an employment; a -bottomless pit, a treasury; a sink, a court; a cap and bells, a favorite; -a broken reed, a court of justice; an empty tun, a general; a running -sore, an administration. - -But should this method fail, recourse might be had to others more -effectual, which learned men call acrostics and anagrams. First, might -be found men of skill and penetration who can discern that all initial -letters have political meanings. Thus N shall signify a plot, B a -regiment of horse, L a fleet at sea. Or, secondly, by transposing the -letters of the alphabet in any suspected paper, they can discover the -deepest designs of a discontented party. So, for example, if I should -say in a letter to a friend: “Our brother Tom has just got the measles,” -a man of skill in this art would discover that the same letters which -compose that sentence might be analyzed into the following words: -Resist.—A Plot is brought home.—The Tower. And this is the anagrammatic -method. - -The professor made me great acknowledgments for communicating these -observations, and promised to make honorable mention of me in his -treatise. - -I saw nothing in this country that could invite me to a longer -continuance, and began to think of returning home to England. - - - - -CHAPTER VII - - THE AUTHOR LEAVES LAGADO—ARRIVES AT MALDONADA—NO SHIP READY—HE - TAKES A SHORT VOYAGE TO GLUBBDUBDRIB—HIS RECEPTION BY THE - GOVERNOR. - - -The continent, of which this kingdom is a part, extends itself, as I have -reason to believe, eastward to that unknown tract of America, westward of -California, and north to the Pacific Ocean, which is not above a hundred -and fifty miles from Lagado, where there is a good port and much commerce -with the great island of Luggnagg, situated to the northwest about 29 -degrees north latitude, and 140 longitude. This island of Luggnagg stands -southeastward of Japan, about a hundred leagues distant. There is a -strict alliance between the Japanese emperor and the king of Luggnagg, -which affords frequent opportunities of sailing from one island to the -other. I determined therefore to direct my course this way, in order to -my return to Europe. I hired two mules, with a guide to show me the way, -and carry my small baggage. I took leave of my noble protector, who had -shown me so much favor, and made me a generous present at my departure. - -My journey was without any accident or adventure worth relating. When I -arrived at the port of Maldonada (for so it is called) there was no ship -in the harbor bound for Luggnagg, nor like to be in some time. The town -is about as large as Portsmouth. I soon fell into some acquaintance, -and was very hospitably received. A gentleman of distinction said to -me, that since the ships bound for Luggnagg could not be ready in less -than a month, it might be no disagreeable amusement for me to take a -trip to the little island of Glubbdubdrib, about five leagues off to the -southwest. He offered himself and a friend to accompany me, and that I -should be provided with a small convenient bark for the voyage. - -Glubbdubdrib, as nearly as I can interpret the word, signifies the Island -of Sorcerers or Magicians. It is about one-third as large as the Isle of -Wight, and extremely fruitful; it is governed by the head of a certain -tribe, who are all magicians. This tribe marries only among each other, -and the eldest in succession is prince or governor. He has a noble -palace, and a park of about three thousand acres, surrounded by a wall of -hewn stone twenty feet high. In this park are several small enclosures -for cattle, corn, and gardening. - -The governor and his family are served and attended by domestics of a -kind somewhat unusual. By his skill in necromancy, he has a power of -calling whom he pleases from the dead, and commanding their service for -twenty-four hours, but no longer; nor can he call the same persons up -again in less than three months, except upon very extraordinary occasions. - -When we arrived at the island, which was about eleven in the morning, -one of the gentlemen who accompanied me went to the governor and desired -admittance for a stranger, who came on purpose to have the honor of -attending on his highness. This was immediately granted, and we all three -entered the gate of the palace between two rows of guards, armed and -dressed after a very antic manner, and something in their countenances -that made my flesh creep with a horror I cannot express. We passed -through several apartments, between servants of the same sort, ranked -on each side as before, till we came to the chamber of presence, -where after three profound obeisances and a few general questions, -we were permitted to sit on three stools near the lowest step of his -highness’s throne. He understood the language of Balnibarbi, although -it were different from that of this island. He desired me to give him -some account of my travels; and to let me see that I should be treated -without ceremony, he dismissed all his attendants with a turn of his -finger; at which, to my great astonishment, they vanished in an instant, -like visions in a dream when we awake on a sudden. I could not recover -myself in some time, till the governor assured me that I should receive -no hurt; and observing my two companions to be under no concern, who had -been often entertained in the same manner, I began to take courage, and -related to his highness a short history of my several adventures, yet not -without some hesitation, and frequently looking behind me to the place -where I had seen those domestic specters. I had the honor to dine with -the governor, where a new set of ghosts served up the meat, and waited at -table. I now observed myself to be less terrified than I had been in the -morning. I stayed till sunset, but humbly desired his highness to excuse -me for not accepting his invitation of lodging in the palace. My two -friends and I lay at a private house in the town adjoining, which is the -capital of this little island; and the next morning we returned to pay -our duty to the governor, as he was pleased to command us. - -After this manner we continued in the island for ten days, most part of -every day with the governor, and at night in our lodging. I soon grew -so familiarized to the sight of spirits, that after the third or fourth -time they gave me no emotion at all; or if I had any apprehensions left, -my curiosity prevailed over them. For his highness the governor ordered -me to call up whatever persons I would choose to name, and in whatever -numbers, among all the dead from the beginning of the world to the -present time, and command them to answer any questions I should think fit -to ask; with this condition, that my questions must be confined within -the compass of the times they lived in. And one thing I might depend -upon, that they would certainly tell me truth, for lying was a talent of -no use in the lower world. - -I made my humble acknowledgments to his highness for so great a favor. -We were in a chamber whence there was a fair prospect into the park. And -because my first inclination was to be entertained with scenes of pomp -and magnificence, I desired to see Alexander the Great at the head of -his army, just after the battle of Arbela; which, upon a motion of the -governor’s finger, immediately appeared in a large field under the window -where we stood. Alexander was called up into the room; it was with great -difficulty that I understood his Greek, and had but little of my own. He -assured me upon his honor that he was not poisoned, but died of a fever, -by excessive drinking. - -Next I saw Hannibal passing the Alps, who told me he had not a drop of -vinegar in his camp. - -I saw Cæsar and Pompey at the head of their troops, just ready to engage. -I saw the former in his last great triumph. I desired that the senate -of Rome might appear before me in one large chamber, and an assembly of -somewhat a later age, in counterview, in another. The first seemed to -be an assembly of heroes and demigods; the other, a knot of peddlers, -pickpockets, highwaymen, and bullies. - -The governor, at my request, gave the sign for Cæsar and Brutus to -advance towards us. I was struck with a profound veneration at the -sight of Brutus, and could easily discover the most consummate virtue, -the greatest intrepidity and firmness of mind, the truest love of his -country, and general benevolence for mankind, in every lineament of -his countenance. I observed with much pleasure, that these two persons -were in good intelligence with each other; and Cæsar freely confessed -to me that the greatest actions of his own life were not equal by -many degrees to the glory of taking it away. I had the honor to have -much conversation with Brutus; and was told that his ancestor Junius, -Socrates, Epaminondas, Cato the Younger, Sir Thomas More, and himself, -were perpetually together; a sextumvirate to which all the ages of the -world cannot add a seventh. - -It would be tedious to trouble the reader with relating what vast numbers -of illustrious persons were called up, to gratify that insatiable desire -I had to see the world in every period of antiquity placed before me. -I chiefly fed mine eyes with beholding the destroyers of tyrants and -usurpers, and the restorers of liberty to oppressed and injured nations. -But it is impossible to express the satisfaction I received in my own -mind, after such a manner as to make it a suitable entertainment to the -reader. - - - - -CHAPTER VIII - - A FURTHER ACCOUNT OF GLUBBDUBDRIB—ANCIENT AND MODERN HISTORY - CORRECTED. - - -Having a desire to see those ancients who were most renowned for wit -and learning, I set apart one day on purpose. I proposed that Homer and -Aristotle might appear at the head of all their commentators; but these -were so numerous that some hundreds were forced to attend in the court -and outward rooms of the palace. I knew and could distinguish those two -heroes at first sight, not only from the crowd, but from each other. -Homer was the taller and comelier person of the two, walked very erect -for one of his age, and his eyes were the most quick and piercing I ever -beheld. Aristotle stooped much, and made use of a staff. His visage was -meager, his hair lank and thin, and his voice hollow. I soon discovered -that both of them were perfect strangers to the rest of the company, -and had never seen or heard of them before. And I had a whisper from a -ghost, who shall be nameless, that these commentators always kept in -the most distant quarters from their principals, in the lower world, -through a consciousness of shame and guilt, because they had so horribly -misrepresented the meaning of those authors to posterity. I introduced -Didymus and Eustathius to Homer, and prevailed on him to treat them -better than perhaps they deserved, for he soon found they wanted a genius -to enter into the spirit of a poet. But Aristotle was out of all patience -with the account I gave him of Scotus and Ramus, as I presented them to -him, and he asked them whether the rest of the tribe were as great dunces -as themselves. - -I then desired the governor to call up Descartes and Gassendi, with whom -I prevailed to explain their systems to Aristotle. This great philosopher -freely acknowledged his own mistakes in natural philosophy, because he -proceeded in many things upon conjecture, as all men must do; and he -found that Gassendi, who had made the doctrine of Epicurus as palatable -as he could, and the vortices of Descartes, were equally exploded. He -predicted the same fate to attraction, whereof the present learned are -such zealous assertors. He said that new systems of nature were but new -fashions which would vary in every age; and even those who pretend to -demonstrate them from mathematical principles, would flourish but a short -period of time, and be out of vogue when that was determined. - -I spent five days in conversing with many others of the ancient learned. -I saw most of the first Roman emperors. I prevailed on the governor to -call up Eliogabulus’s cooks to dress us a dinner, but they could not -show us much of their skill, for want of materials. A helot of Agesilaus -made us a dish of Spartan broth, but I was not able to get down a second -spoonful. - -The two gentlemen who conducted me to the island were pressed by their -private affairs to return in three days, which I employed in seeing some -of the modern dead, who had made the greatest figure for two or three -hundred years past, in our own and other countries of Europe; and having -been always a great admirer of old illustrious families, I desired the -governor would call up a dozen or two of kings, with their ancestors in -order, for eight or nine generations. But my disappointment was grievous -and unexpected. For, instead of a long train with royal diadems, I -saw in one family two fiddlers, three spruce courtiers, and an Italian -prelate. In another, a barber, an abbot, and two cardinals. I have too -great a veneration for crowned heads to dwell any longer on so nice a -subject. But as to counts, marquises, dukes, earls, and the like, I was -not so scrupulous. And I confess it was not without some pleasure that -I found myself able to trace the particular features by which certain -families are distinguished, up to their originals. I could plainly -discover from whence one family derives a long chin; why a second has -abounded with knaves for two generations, and fools for two more; why a -third happened to be crack-brained, and a fourth to be sharpers; whence -it came, what Polydore Virgil says of a certain great house, _Nec vir -fortis; nec fæmina casta_; how cruelty, falsehood, and cowardice grew to -be characteristics by which certain families are distinguished as much -as by their coat of arms. Neither could I wonder at all this, when I saw -such an interruption of lineages, by pages, lackeys, valets, coachmen, -gamesters, captains, and pickpockets. - -I was chiefly disgusted with modern history. For having strictly examined -all the persons of greatest name in the courts of princes for a hundred -years past, I found how the world had been misled by prostitute writers, -to ascribe the greatest exploits in war to cowards, the wisest counsel -to fools, sincerity to flatterers, Roman virtue to betrayers of their -country, piety to atheists, truth to informers; how many innocent and -excellent persons had been condemned to death or banishment by the -practicing of great ministers upon the corruption of judges, and the -malice of factions; how many villains had been exalted to the highest -places of trust, power, dignity, and profit; how great a share in the -motions and events of courts, councils, and senates might be challenged -by pimps, parasites, and buffoons. How low an opinion I had of human -wisdom and integrity when I was truly informed of the springs and -motives of great enterprises and revolutions in the world, and of the -contemptible accidents to which they owed their success! - -Here I discovered the roguery and ignorance of those who pretend to write -anecdotes, or secret history; who send so many kings to their graves with -a cup of poison; will repeat the discourse between a prince and a chief -minister, where no witness was by; unlock the thoughts and cabinets of -ambassadors and secretaries of state; and have the perpetual misfortune -to be mistaken. Here I discovered the secret causes of many great events -that have surprised the world. A general confessed in my presence, that -he got a victory purely by the force of cowardice and ill conduct; and an -admiral, that for want of proper intelligence, he beat the enemy to whom -he intended to betray the fleet. Three kings protested to me, that in -their whole reigns they did never once prefer any person of merit, unless -by mistake or treachery of some minister in whom they confided; neither -would they do it if they were to live again; and they showed, with great -strength of reason, that the royal throne could not be supported without -corruption, because that positive, confident, restive temper which virtue -infused into man, was a perpetual clog to public business. - -I had the curiosity to inquire in a particular manner, by what method -great numbers had procured to themselves high titles of honor, and -prodigious estates; and I confined my inquiry to a very modern period; -however, without grating upon present times because I would be sure to -give no offense even to foreigners; for I hope the reader need not be -told, that I do not in the least intend my own country in what I say upon -this occasion. A great number of persons concerned were called up, and -upon a very slight examination, discovered such a scene of infamy, that -I cannot reflect upon it without some seriousness. Perjury, oppression, -subornation, fraud, panderism, and the like infirmities, were among the -most excusable arts they had to mention; and for these I gave, as it was -reasonable, great allowance. But when some confessed they owed their -greatness and wealth to vice; others to the betraying their country -or their prince; some to poisoning, more to the perverting of justice -in order to destroy the innocent, I hope I may be pardoned if these -discoveries inclined me a little to abate of that profound veneration -which I am naturally apt to pay to persons of high rank, who ought to be -treated with the utmost respect due to their sublime dignity, by us their -inferiors. - -I had often read of some great services done to princes and states, and -desired to see the persons by whom those services were performed. Upon -inquiry, I was told that their names were to be found on no record, -except a few of them whom history has represented as the vilest rogues -and traitors. As to the rest, I had never once heard of them. They all -appeared with dejected looks, and in the meanest habit, most of them -telling me they died in poverty and disgrace, and the rest on a scaffold -or a gibbet. - -Among the rest there was one person whose case appeared a little -singular. He had a youth about eighteen years old standing by his side. -He told me he had for many years been commander of a ship, and in the -sea fight at Actium had the good fortune to break through the enemies’ -great line of battle, sink three of their capital ships, and take a -fourth, which was the sole cause of Antony’s flight, and of the victory -that insued; that the youth standing by him, his only son, was killed in -the action. He added that upon the confidence of some merit, this war -being at an end, he went to Rome, and solicited at the court of Augustus -to be preferred to a greater ship, whose commander had been killed; -but without any regard to his pretensions, it was given to a youth who -had never seen the sea, the son of Libertina, who waited on one of the -emperor’s mistresses. Returning to his own vessel, he was charged with -neglect of duty, and the ship given to a favorite page of Publicola, the -vice-admiral; whereupon he retired to a poor farm at a great distance -from Rome, and there ended his life. I was so curious to know the truth -of this story, that I desired Agrippa might be called, who was admiral in -that fight. He appeared, and confirmed the whole account; but with much -more advantage to the captain, whose modesty had extenuated or concealed -a great part of his merit. - -I was surprised to find corruption grown so high and so quick in that -empire, by the force of luxury so lately introduced; which made me less -wonder at many parallel cases in other countries, where vices of all -kinds have reigned so much longer, and where the whole praise as well as -pillage has been engrossed by the chief commander, who perhaps had the -least title to either. - -As every person called up made exactly the same appearance he had done in -the world, it gave me melancholy reflections to observe how much the race -of human kind was degenerate among us, within these hundred years past. - -I descended so low as to desire that some English yeomen of the old stamp -might be summoned to appear, once so famous for the simplicity of their -manners, diet, and dress; for justice in their dealings; for their true -spirit of liberty; for their valor, and love of their country. Neither -could I be wholly unmoved after comparing the living with the dead, when -I considered how all these pure native virtues were prostituted for a -piece of money by their grandchildren, who, in selling their votes and -managing at elections, have acquired every vice and corruption that can -possibly be learned in a court. - - - - -CHAPTER IX - - THE AUTHOR’S RETURN TO MALDONADA—SAILS TO THE KINGDOM OF - LUGGNAGG—THE AUTHOR CONFINED—HE IS SENT FOR TO COURT—THE MANNER - OF HIS ADMITTANCE—THE KING’S GREAT LENITY TO HIS SUBJECTS. - - -The day of our departure being come, I took leave of his highness -the governor of Glubbdubdrib, and returned with my two companions to -Maldonada, where, after a fortnight’s waiting, a ship was ready to sail -for Luggnagg. The two gentlemen and some others were so generous and kind -as to furnish me with provisions, and see me on board. I was a month -in this voyage. We had one violent storm, and were under a necessity -of steering westward to get into the trade wind, which holds for above -sixty leagues. On the 21st of April, 1709, we sailed into the river of -Clumegnig, which is a seaport town, at the southeast point of Luggnagg. -We cast anchor within a league of the town, and made a signal for a -pilot. Two of them came on board in less than half an hour, by whom we -were guided between certain shoals and rocks which are very dangerous in -the passage to a large basin, where a fleet may ride in safety within a -cable’s length of the town wall. - -Some of our sailors, whether out of treachery or inadvertence, had -informed the pilots that I was a stranger and a great traveler, whereof -these gave notice to a customhouse officer, by whom I was examined very -strictly upon my landing. This officer spoke to me in the language of -Balnibarbi, which by the force of much commerce is generally understood -in that town, especially by seamen and those employed in the customs. -I gave him a short account of some particulars, and made my story as -plausible and consistent as I could; but I thought it necessary to -disguise my country, and call myself a Hollander, because my intentions -were for Japan, and I knew the Dutch were the only Europeans permitted -to enter into that kingdom. I therefore told the officer that having -been shipwrecked on the coast of Balnibarbi, and cast on a rock, I was -received up into Laputa, or the flying island (of which he had often -heard), and was now endeavoring to get to Japan, whence I might find a -convenience of returning to my own country. The officer said I must be -confined till he could receive orders from court, for which he would -write immediately, and hoped to receive an answer in a fortnight. I -was carried to a convenient lodging, with a sentry placed at the door; -however I had the liberty of a large garden, and was treated with -humanity enough, being maintained all the time at the king’s charge. I -was visited by several persons, chiefly out of curiosity, because it was -reported that I came from countries very remote, of which they had never -heard. - -I hired a young man who came in the same ship to be an interpreter; he -was a native of Luggnagg, but had lived some years at Maldonada, and was -a perfect master of both languages. By his assistance I was able to hold -a conversation with those who came to visit me; but this consisted only -of their questions and my answers. - -The dispatch came from court about the time we expected. It contained a -warrant for conducting me and my retinue to Traldragdubh, or Trildrogdrib -(for it is pronounced both ways as near as I can remember), by a party -of ten horse. All my retinue was that poor lad for an interpreter, whom -I persuaded into my service, and at my humble request, we had each of -us a mule to ride on. A messenger was dispatched half a day’s journey -before us, to give the king notice of my approach; and to desire that -his majesty would please to appoint a day and hour, when it would be his -gracious pleasure that I might have the honor to lick the dust before -his footstool. This is the court style, and I found it to be more than -matter of form: for, upon my admittance two days after my arrival, I -was commanded to crawl on my belly, and lick the floor as I advanced; -but on account of my being a stranger, care was taken to have it swept -so clean that the dust was not offensive. However, this was a peculiar -grace, not allowed to any but persons of the highest rank, when they -desire an admittance. Nay, sometimes the floor is strewed with dust -on purpose, when the person to be admitted happens to have powerful -enemies at court; and I have seen a great lord with his mouth so crammed, -that when he had crept to the proper distance from the throne, he was -not able to speak a word. Neither is there any remedy, because it is -capital for those who receive an audience to spit or wipe their mouths -in his majesty’s presence. There is indeed another custom which I cannot -altogether approve of: When the king has a mind to put any of his nobles -to death in a gentle indulgent manner, he commands to have the floor -strewn with a certain brown powder of a deadly composition, which, being -licked up, infallibly kills him in twenty-four hours. But in justice to -this prince’s great clemency, and the care he has of his subjects’ lives -(wherein it were much to be wished that the monarchs of Europe would -imitate him), it must be mentioned for his honor, that strict orders are -given to have the infected parts of the floor well washed after every -such execution, which if his domestics neglect, they are in danger of -incurring his royal displeasure. I myself heard him give directions that -one of his pages should be whipped, whose turn it was to give notice -about washing the floor after an execution, but maliciously had omitted -it, by which neglect a young lord of great hopes, coming to an audience, -was unfortunately poisoned, although the king at that time had no design -against his life. But this good prince was so gracious as to forgive the -poor page his whipping, upon promise that he would do so no more, without -special orders. - -To return from this digression: When I had crept within four yards of -the throne, I raised myself gently upon my knees, and then striking my -forehead seven times on the ground, I pronounced the following words, as -they had been taught me the night before: _Ickpling gloffthrobb spuut -serumm blhiop mlashnalt zwin tnodbalkuffh slhiophad gurdlubh asht._ This -is the compliment established by the laws of the land for all persons -admitted to the king’s presence. It may be rendered into English thus: -“May your celestial majesty outlive the sun, eleven moons and a half!” -To this the king returned some answer, which although I could not -understand, yet I replied as I had been directed: _Fluft drin yalerick -dwuldom prastrad mirpush_, which properly signifies, “My tongue is in -the mouth of my friend”; and by this expression was meant that I desired -leave to bring my interpreter; whereupon the young man already mentioned -was accordingly introduced, by whose intervention I answered as many -questions as his majesty could put in above an hour. I spoke in the -Balnibarbian tongue, and my interpreter delivered my meaning in that of -Luggnagg. - -The king was much delighted with my company, and ordered his -_bliffmarklub_, or high-chamberlain, to appoint a lodging in the court -for me and my interpreter, with a daily allowance for my table, and a -large purse of gold for my common expenses. - -I stayed three months in this country out of perfect obedience to his -majesty, who was pleased highly to favor me, and made me very honorable -offers. But I thought it more consistent with prudence and justice to -pass the remainder of my days with my wife and family. - - - - -CHAPTER X - - THE LUGGNAGGIANS COMMENDED—A PARTICULAR DESCRIPTION OF THE - STRULDBRUGS, WITH MANY CONVERSATIONS BETWEEN THE AUTHOR AND - SOME EMINENT PERSONS UPON THAT SUBJECT. - - -The Luggnaggians are a polite and generous people, and although they are -not without some share of that pride which is peculiar to all Eastern -countries, yet they show themselves courteous to strangers, especially -such who are countenanced by the court. I had many acquaintances among -persons of the best fashion, and being always attended by my interpreter, -the conversation we had was not disagreeable. - -One day in much good company I was asked by a person of quality whether -I had seen any of their _struldbrugs_, or immortals. I said I had not, -and desired he would explain to me what he meant by such an appellation -applied to a mortal creature. He told me that sometimes, though very -rarely, a child happened to be born in a family with a red circular -spot in the forehead, directly over the left eyebrow, which was an -infallible mark that it should never die. The spot, as he described -it, was about the compass of a silver threepence, but in the course of -time grew larger, and changed its color; for at twelve years old it -became green, so continued till five-and-twenty, then turned to a deep -blue; at five-and-forty it grew coal-black, and as large as an English -shilling, but never admitted any farther alteration. He said these -births were so rare, that he did not believe there could be above eleven -hundred _struldbrugs_ of both sexes in the whole kingdom, of which he -computed about fifty in the metropolis, and among the rest a young girl -born about three years ago; that these productions were not peculiar -to any family, but a mere effect of chance, and the children of the -_struldbrugs_ themselves were equally mortal with the rest of the people. - -I freely own myself to have been struck with inexpressible delight -upon hearing this account; and the person who gave it me happening -to understand the Balnibarbian language, which I spoke very well, I -could not forbear breaking out into expressions perhaps a little too -extravagant. I cried out, as in a rapture, “Happy nation, where every -child has at least a chance for being immortal! Happy people, who enjoy -so many living examples of ancient virtue, and have masters ready to -instruct them in the wisdom of all former ages! but happiest beyond all -comparison are those excellent _struldbrugs_, who, born exempt from -that universal calamity of human nature, have their minds free and -disengaged, without the weight and depression of spirits caused by the -continual apprehension of death.” I discovered my admiration that I had -not observed any of these illustrious persons at court; the black spot -on the forehead being so remarkable a distinction, that I could not have -easily overlooked it; and it was impossible that his majesty, a most -judicious prince, should not provide himself with a good number of such -wise and able counselors. Yet perhaps the virtue of those reverend sages -was too strict for the corrupt and libertine manners of a court; and we -often find by experience, that young men are too opinionated and volatile -to be guided by the sober dictates of their seniors. However, since the -king was pleased to allow me access to his royal person, I was resolved -upon the very first occasion, to deliver my opinion to him on this -matter freely and at large, by the help of my interpreter; and whether he -would please to take my advice or no, yet in one thing I was determined, -that his majesty having frequently offered me an establishment in this -country, I would with great thankfulness accept the favor, and pass my -life here in the conversation of those superior beings the _struldbrugs_, -if they would please to admit me. - -The gentleman to whom I addressed my discourse, because (as I have -already observed) he spoke the language of Balnibarbi, said to me with a -sort of a smile which usually arises from pity to the ignorant, that he -was glad of any occasion to keep me among them, and desired my permission -to explain to the company what I had spoken. He did so, and they talked -together for some time in their own language, whereof I understood not a -syllable, neither could I observe by their countenances what impression -my discourse had made on them. After a short silence, the same person -told me that his friends and mine (so he thought fit to express himself) -were very much pleased with the judicious remarks I had made on the great -happiness and advantages of immortal life, and they were desirous to know -in a particular manner, what scheme of living I should have formed to -myself if it had fallen to my lot to have been born a _struldbrug_. - -I answered, it was easy to be eloquent on so copious and delightful a -subject, especially to me, who had been often apt to amuse myself with -visions of what I should do if I were a king, a general, or a great lord; -and upon this very case I had frequently run over the whole system how I -should employ myself, and pass the time, if I were sure to live forever. - -That if it had been my good fortune to come into the world a -_struldbrug_, as soon as I could discover my own happiness by -understanding the difference between life and death, I would first -resolve, by all arts and methods whatsoever, to procure myself riches; in -the pursuit of which, by thrift and management, I might reasonably expect -in about two hundred years to be the wealthiest man in the kingdom. In -the second place, I would from my earliest youth apply myself to the -study of arts and sciences, by which I should arrive in time to excel all -others in learning. Lastly, I would carefully record every action and -event of consequence that happened in the public, impartially draw the -characters of the several successions of princes and great ministers of -state, with my own observations on every point. I would exactly set down -the several changes in customs, language, fashions of dress, diet, and -diversions. By all which acquirements I should be a living treasury of -knowledge and wisdom, and certainly become the oracle of the nation. - -I would never marry after threescore, but live in a hospitable manner, -yet still on the saving side. I would entertain myself in forming and -directing the minds of hopeful young men, by convincing them from my own -remembrance, experience, and observation, fortified by numerous examples, -of the usefulness of virtue in public and private life. But my choice -and constant companions should be a set of my own immortal brotherhood, -among whom I would elect a dozen from the most ancient down to my own -contemporaries. Where any of these wanted fortunes, I would provide them -with convenient lodges round my own estate, and have some of them always -at my table; only mingling a few of the most valuable among you mortals, -whom length of time would harden me to lose with little or no reluctance, -and treat your posterity after the same manner; just as a man diverts -himself with the annual succession of pinks and tulips in his garden, -without regretting the loss of those which withered the preceding year. - -These _struldbrugs_ and I would mutually communicate our observations -and memorials, through the course of time; remark the several gradations -by which corruption steals into the world, and oppose it in every step, -by giving perpetual warning and instruction to mankind; which, added to -the strong influence of our own example, would probably prevent that -continual degeneracy of human nature so unjustly complained of in all -ages. - -Add to all this the pleasure of seeing the various revolutions of -states and empires; the changes in the lower and upper world; ancient -cities in ruins, and obscure villages become the seats of kings; famous -rivers lessening into shallow brooks; the ocean leaving one coast dry, -and overwhelming another; the discovery of many countries yet unknown; -barbarity overrunning the politest nations, and the most barbarous -become civilized. I should then see the discovery of the longitude, the -perpetual motion, the universal medicine, and many other great inventions -brought to the utmost perfection. - -What wonderful discoveries should we make in astronomy, by outliving and -confirming our own predictions; by observing the progress and returns of -comets, with the changes of motion in the sun, moon, and stars! - -I enlarged upon many other topics which the natural desire of endless -life and sublunary happiness could easily furnish me with. When I had -ended, and the sum of my discourse had been interpreted as before, to -the rest of the company, there was a good deal of talk among them in the -language of the country, not without some laughter at my expense. At last -the same gentleman who had been my interpreter said he was desired by the -rest to set me right in a few mistakes which I had fallen into through -the common imbecility of human nature, and upon that allowance was less -answerable for them. That this breed of _struldbrugs_ was peculiar to -their country, for there were no such people either in Balnibarbi or -Japan, where he had the honor to be ambassador from his majesty, and -found the natives in both those kingdoms very hard to believe that the -fact was possible, and it appeared from my astonishment when he first -mentioned the matter to me, that I received it as a thing wholly new, and -scarcely to be credited. That in the two kingdoms above mentioned, where -during his residence he had conversed very much, he observed long life to -be the universal desire and wish of mankind. That whoever had one foot in -the grave was sure to hold back the other as strongly as he could. That -the oldest had still hopes of living one day longer, and looked on death -as the greatest evil, from which nature always prompted him to retreat. -Only in this island of Luggnagg the appetite for living was not so eager, -from the continual example of the _struldbrugs_ before their eyes. - -That the system of living contrived by me was unreasonable and unjust, -because it supposed a perpetuity of youth, health, and vigor, which no -man could be so foolish to hope, however extravagant he may be in his -wishes. That the question therefore was not whether a man would choose -to be always in the prime of youth, attended with prosperity and health, -but how he would pass a perpetual life under all the usual disadvantages -which old age brings along with it. For although few men will avow their -desires of being immortal upon such hard conditions, yet in the two -kingdoms before mentioned, of Balnibarbi and Japan, he observed that -every man desired to put off death for some time longer, let it approach -ever so late; and he rarely heard of any man who died willingly, except -he were incited by the extremity of grief or torture. And he appealed to -me, whether in those countries I had traveled, as well as my own, I had -not observed the same general disposition. - -After this preface, he gave me a particular account of the _struldbrugs_ -among them. He said they commonly acted like mortals till about thirty -years old; after which, by degrees, they grew melancholy and dejected, -increasing in both till they came to fourscore. This he learned from -their own confession; for otherwise, there not being above two or -three of that species born in an age, they were too few to form a -general observation by. When they came to fourscore years, which is -reckoned the extremity of living in this country, they had not only -all the follies and infirmities of other old men, but many more which -arose from the dreadful prospect of never dying. They were not only -opinionative, peevish, covetous, morose, vain, talkative, but incapable -of friendship, and dead to all natural affection, which never descended -below their grandchildren. Envy and impotent desires are their prevailing -passions. But those objects against which their envy seems principally -directed, are the vices of the younger sort, and the deaths of the old. -By reflecting on the former, they find themselves cut off from all -possibility of pleasure; and whenever they see a funeral they lament and -repine that others are gone to a harbor of rest, to which they themselves -never can hope to arrive. They have no remembrance of anything but what -they learned and observed in their youth and middle age, and even that is -very imperfect; and for the truth or particulars of any fact it is safer -to depend on common traditions than upon their best recollections. The -least miserable among them appear to be those who turn to dotage, and -entirely lose their memories; these meet with more pity and assistance, -because they want many bad qualities which abound in others. - -If a _struldbrug_ happen to marry one of his own kind, the marriage -is dissolved of course by the courtesy of the kingdom, as soon as the -younger of the two comes to be fourscore; for the law thinks it a -reasonable indulgence, that those who are condemned without any fault of -their own to a perpetual continuance in the world, should not have their -misery doubled by the load of a wife. - -As soon as they have completed the term of eighty years, they are looked -on as dead in law; their heirs immediately succeed to their estates, -only a small pittance is reserved for their support, and the poor ones -are maintained at the public charge. After that period they are held -incapable of any employment of trust or profit; they cannot purchase -lands or take leases; neither are they allowed to be witnesses in any -cause, either civil or criminal, not even for the decision of meres and -bounds. - -At ninety they lose their teeth and hair; they have at that age no -distinction of taste, but eat and drink whatever they can get, without -relish or appetite. The diseases they were subject to still continue, -without increasing or diminishing. In talking they forget the common -appellation of things, and the names of persons, even of those who are -their nearest friends and relations. For the same reason, they never -can amuse themselves with reading, because their memory will not serve -to carry them from the beginning of a sentence to the end; and by this -defect they are deprived of the only entertainment whereof they might -otherwise be capable. - -The language of this country being always upon the flux, the -_struldbrugs_ of one age do not understand those of another; neither are -they able after two hundred years to hold any conversation (farther than -by a few general words) with their neighbors the mortals; and thus they -lie under the disadvantage of living like foreigners in their own country. - -This was the account given me of the _struldbrugs_, as near as I can -remember. I afterwards saw five or six of different ages, the youngest -not above two hundred years old, who were brought to me at several times -by some of my friends; but although they were told that I was a great -traveler and had seen all the world, they had not the least curiosity to -ask me a question; only desired I would give them _slumskudask_, or a -token of remembrance, which is a modest way of begging, to avoid the law -that strictly forbids it, because they are provided for by the public, -although indeed with a very scanty allowance. - -They are despised and hated by all sorts of people. When one of them -is born it is reckoned ominous, and their birth is recorded very -particularly; so that you may know their age by consulting the registry, -which however has not been kept above a thousand years past, or at least -has been destroyed by time or public disturbances. But the usual way of -computing how old they are, is by asking them what kings or great persons -they can remember, and then consulting history; for infallibly the last -prince in their mind did not begin his reign after they were fourscore -years old. - -They were the most mortifying sight I ever beheld; and the women were -more horrible than the men. Besides the usual deformities in extreme -old age, they acquired an additional ghastliness in proportion to their -number of years, which is not to be described; and among half a dozen, I -soon distinguished which was the eldest, although there was not above a -century or two between them. - -The reader will easily believe, that from what I had heard and seen, my -keen appetite for perpetuity of life was much abated. I grew heartily -ashamed of the pleasing visions I had formed, and thought no tyrant could -invent a death into which I would not run with pleasure from such a life. -The king heard of all that had passed between me and my friends upon this -occasion, and rallied me very pleasantly, wishing I would send a couple -of _struldbrugs_ to my own country, to arm our people against the fear of -death; but this, it seems, is forbidden by the fundamental laws of the -kingdom, or else I should have been well content with the trouble and -expense of transporting them. - -I could not but agree that the laws of this kingdom relative to the -_struldbrugs_ were founded upon the strongest reasons, and such as -any other country would be under the necessity of enacting in the like -circumstances. Otherwise, as avarice is the necessary consequent of -old age, those immortals would in time become proprietors of the whole -nation, and engross the civil power, which, for want of abilities to -manage, must end in the ruin of the public. - -[Illustration] - - - - -CHAPTER XI - - THE AUTHOR LEAVES LUGGNAGG AND SAILS TO JAPAN—FROM THENCE HE - RETURNS IN A DUTCH SHIP TO AMSTERDAM, AND FROM AMSTERDAM TO - ENGLAND. - - -I thought this account of the _struldbrugs_ might be some entertainment -to the reader, because it seems to be a little out of the common way; at -least I do not remember to have met the like in any book of travels that -has come to my hands. And if I am deceived, my excuse must be, that it -is necessary for travelers who describe the same country, very often to -agree in dwelling on the same particulars, without deserving the censure -of having borrowed or transcribed from those who wrote before them. - -There is indeed a perpetual commerce between this kingdom and the great -empire of Japan, and it is very probable that the Japanese authors may -have given some account of the _struldbrugs_; but my stay in Japan was so -short, and I was so entirely a stranger to that language, that I was not -qualified to make any inquiries. But I hope the Dutch, upon this notice, -will be curious and able enough to supply my defects. - -His majesty having often pressed me to accept some employment in his -court, and finding me absolutely determined to return to my native -country, was pleased to give me his license to depart, and honored me -with a letter of recommendation under his own hand, to the Emperor of -Japan. He likewise presented me with four hundred and forty-four large -pieces of gold (this nation delighting in even numbers), and a red -diamond which I sold in England for eleven hundred pounds. - -On the sixth of May, 1709, I took a solemn leave of his majesty and all -my friends. This prince was so gracious as to order a guard to conduct -me to Glanguenstald, which is a royal port to the southwest part of -the island. In six days I found a vessel ready to carry me to Japan, -and spent fifteen days in the voyage. We landed at a small port town -called Xamoschi, situated on the southeast part of Japan; the town lies -on the western point, where there is a narrow strait leading northward -into a long arm of the sea, upon the northwest part of which Yedo, the -metropolis, stands. At landing I showed the customhouse officers my -letter from the king of Luggnagg to his imperial majesty. They knew -the seal perfectly well; it was as broad as the palm of my hand. The -impression was a king lifting up a lame beggar from the earth. The -magistrates of the town, hearing of my letter, received me as a public -minister; they provided me with carriages and servants, and bore my -charges to Yedo, where I was admitted to an audience, and delivered -my letter, which was opened with great ceremony, and explained to the -emperor by an interpreter, who then gave me notice, by his majesty’s -order, that I should signify my request, and whatever it were, it -should be granted for the sake of his royal brother of Luggnagg. -This interpreter was a person employed to transact affairs with the -Hollanders; he soon conjectured by my countenance, that I was a European, -and therefore repeated his majesty’s commands in Low Dutch, which he -spoke perfectly well. I answered, as I had before determined, that I was -a Dutch merchant, shipwrecked in a remote country, whence I traveled -by sea and land to Luggnagg, and then took shipping for Japan, where -I knew my countrymen often traded, and with some of these I hoped to -get an opportunity of returning into Europe. I therefore most humbly -entreated his royal favor, to give order that I should be conducted -in safety to Nangasac. To this I added another petition, that for the -sake of my patron the king of Luggnagg his majesty would condescend to -excuse my performing the ceremony imposed on my countrymen of trampling -upon the crucifix, because I had been thrown into his kingdom by my -misfortunes, without any intention of trading. When this latter petition -was interpreted to the emperor, he seemed a little surprised, and said -he believed I was the first of my countrymen who ever made any scruple -in this point, and that he began to doubt whether I was a real Hollander -or no; but rather suspected that I must be a Christian. However, for the -reasons I had offered, but chiefly to gratify the king of Luggnagg by an -uncommon mark of his favor, he would comply with the singularity of my -humor; but the affair must be managed with dexterity, and his officers -should be commanded to let me pass as it were by forgetfulness; for he -assured me that if the secret should be discovered by my countrymen, the -Dutch, they would cut my throat on the voyage. I returned my thanks, by -the interpreter, for so unusual a favor; and some troops being at that -time on the march to Nangasac, the commanding officer had orders to -convey me safe thither, with particular instructions about the business -of the crucifix. - -On the 9th day of June, 1709, I arrived at Nangasac, after a very long -and troublesome journey. I soon fell into company of some Dutch sailors -belonging to the Amboyna of Amsterdam, a stout ship of 450 tons. I had -lived long in Holland, pursuing my studies at Leyden, and I spoke Dutch -well. The seamen soon knew whence I came last; they were curious to -inquire into my voyages and course of life. I made up a story as short -and probable as I could, but concealed the greatest part. I knew many -persons in Holland; I was able to invent names for my parents, whom I -pretended to be obscure people in the province of Gelderland. I would -have given the captain (one Theodorus Vangrult) what he pleased to ask -for my voyage to Holland; but understanding I was a surgeon, he was -contented to take half the usual rate, on condition that I would serve -him in the way of my calling. Before we took ship, I was often asked by -some of the crew whether I had performed the ceremony above mentioned. I -evaded the question by general answers that I had satisfied the emperor -and court in all particulars. However, a malicious rogue of a skipper -went to an officer, and pointing to me, told him I had not yet trampled -on the crucifix; but the other, who had received instructions to let me -pass, gave the rascal twenty strokes on the shoulders with a bamboo; -after which I was no more troubled with such questions. - -Nothing happened worth mentioning in this voyage. We sailed with a fair -wind to the Cape of Good Hope, where we stayed only to take in fresh -water. On the 16th of April we arrived safe at Amsterdam, having lost -only three men by sickness in the voyage, and a fourth who fell from the -foremast into the sea, not far from the coast of Guinea. From Amsterdam I -soon after set sail for England, in a small vessel belonging to that city. - -On the 10th of April, 1710, we put in at the Downs. I landed the next -morning, and saw once more my native country, after an absence of -five years and six months complete. I went straight to Redriff, where -I arrived the same day at two in the afternoon, and found my wife and -family in good health. - - -THE END OF THE THIRD PART. - - - - -A VOYAGE TO THE COUNTRY OF THE HOUYHNHNMS - - - - -CHAPTER I - - THE AUTHOR SETS OUT AS CAPTAIN OF A SHIP—HIS MEN CONSPIRE - AGAINST HIM, CONFINE HIM A LONG TIME TO HIS CABIN, AND SET HIM - ON SHORE IN AN UNKNOWN LAND—HE TRAVELS UP IN THE COUNTRY—THE - YAHOOS, A STRANGE SORT OF ANIMAL, DESCRIBED—THE AUTHOR MEETS - TWO HOUYHNHNMS. - - -I continued at home with my wife and children about five months in a -very happy condition, if I could have learned the lesson of knowing -when I was well. I left my poor wife big with child, and accepted an -advantageous offer made me to be captain of the Adventure, a stout -merchantman of 350 tons: for I understood navigation well, and being -grown weary of a surgeon’s employment at sea, which, however, I could -exercise upon occasion, I took a skillful young man of that calling, one -Robert Purefoy, into my ship. We set sail from Portsmouth upon the 7th -day of August, 1710; on the 14th, we met with Captain Pocock of Bristol, -at Tenerife, who was going to the bay of Campeachy to cut logwood. On the -16th, he was parted from us by a storm: I heard since my return, that his -ship foundered, and none escaped but one cabin-boy. He was an honest man, -and a good sailor, but a little too positive in his own opinions; which -was the cause of his destruction, as it has been of several others: for -if he had followed my advice, he might have been safe at home with his -family at this time as well as myself. - -I had several men died in my ship of calentures, so that I was forced to -get recruits out of Barbadoes and the Leeward Islands, where I touched -by the direction of the merchants who employed me; which I had soon too -much cause to repent; for I found afterwards that most of them had been -buccaneers. I had fifty hands on board, and my orders were, that I should -trade with the Indians in the South Sea, and make what discoveries I -could. These rogues whom I had picked up debauched my other men, and -they all formed a conspiracy to seize the ship and secure me; which they -did one morning, rushing into my cabin, and binding me hand and foot, -threatening to throw me overboard if I offered to stir. I told them I was -their prisoner and would submit. This they made me swear to do, and then -they unbound me, only fastening one of my legs with a chain, near my bed, -and placed a sentry at my door with his piece charged, who was commanded -to shoot me dead, if I attempted my liberty. They sent me down victuals -and drink, and took the government of the ship to themselves. Their -design was to turn pirates, and plunder the Spaniards, which they could -not do till they got more men. But first they resolved to sell the goods -in the ship, and then go to Madagascar for recruits, several among them -having died since my confinement. They sailed many weeks, and traded with -the Indians; but I knew not what course they took, being kept a close -prisoner in my cabin, and expecting nothing less than to be murdered, as -they often threatened me. - -Upon the 9th of May, 1711, one James Welch came down to my cabin, and -said he had orders from the captain to set me ashore. I expostulated -with him, but in vain; neither would he so much as tell me who their -new captain was. They forced me into the longboat, letting me put on my -best suit of clothes, which were as good as new, and take a small bundle -of linen, but no arms except my hanger; and they were so civil as not -to search my pockets, into which I conveyed what money I had, with some -other little necessaries. They rowed about a league, and then set me down -on a strand. I desired them to tell me what country it was. They all -swore they knew no more than myself, but said that the captain (as they -called him) was resolved, after they had sold the lading, to get rid of -me in the first place where they could discover land. They pushed off -immediately, advising me to make haste for fear of being overtaken by the -tide, and so bade me farewell. - -In this desolate condition I advanced, and soon got upon firm ground, -where I sat down on a bank to rest myself, and consider what I had -best to do. When I was a little refreshed, I went up into the country, -resolving to deliver myself to the first savages I should meet, and -purchase my life from them by some bracelets, glass rings, and other -toys which sailors usually provide themselves with in those voyages, and -whereof I had some about me. The land was divided by long rows of trees, -not regularly planted, but naturally growing; there was great plenty of -grass, and several fields of oats. I walked very circumspectly, for fear -of being surprised, or suddenly shot with an arrow from behind or on -either side. I fell into a beaten road, where I saw many tracks of human -feet, and some of cows, but most of horses. At last I beheld several -animals in a field, and one or two of the same kind sitting in trees. -Their shape was very singular and deformed, which a little discomposed -me, so that I lay down behind a thicket to observe them better. Some of -them coming forward near the place where I lay, gave me an opportunity of -distinctly marking their form. Their heads and breasts were covered with -a thick hair, some frizzled and others lank; they had beards like goats, -and a long ridge of hair down their backs, and the foreparts of their -legs and feet; but the rest of their bodies was bare, so that I might -see their skins, which were of a brown buff color. They had no tails, and -used the sitting posture, as well as lying down, and often stood on their -hind feet. They climbed high trees as nimbly as a squirrel, for they had -strong extended claws before and behind, terminating in sharp points, and -hooked. They would often spring, and bound, and leap, with prodigious -agility. The females were not so large as the males; they had long lank -hair on their backs, but none on their faces, nor anything more than a -sort of down on the rest of their bodies. The hair of both sexes was of -several colors, brown, red, black, and yellow. Upon the whole I never -beheld in all my travels so disagreeable an animal, nor one against which -I naturally conceived so strong an antipathy; so that thinking I had seen -enough, full of contempt and aversion, I got up, and pursued the beaten -road, hoping it might direct me to the cabin of some Indian. I had not -gone far when I met one of these creatures full in my way, and coming up -directly to me. The ugly monster, when he saw me, distorted several ways -every feature of his visage, and stared as at an object he had never seen -before; then approaching nearer, lifted up his forepaw, whether out of -curiosity or mischief I could not tell; but I drew my hanger, and gave -him a good blow with the flat side of it, for I durst not strike him with -the edge, fearing the inhabitants might be provoked against me, if they -should come to know that I had killed or maimed any of their cattle. When -the beast felt the smart, he drew back, and roared so loud, that a herd -of at least forty came flocking about me from the next field, howling and -making odious faces; but I ran to the body of a tree, and leaning my back -against it, kept them off by waving my hanger. - -In the midst of this distress, I observed all to run away on a sudden as -fast as they could; at which I ventured to leave the tree and pursue the -road, wondering what it was that could put them into this fright. But -looking on my left hand I saw a horse walking softly in the field; which -my persecutors having sooner discovered, was the cause of their flight. -The horse started a little when he came near me, but soon recovering -himself, looked full in my face with manifest tokens of wonder. He viewed -my hands and feet, walking round me several times. I would have pursued -my journey, but he placed himself directly in the way, yet looking with -a very mild aspect, never offering the least violence. We stood gazing -at each other for some time; at last I took the boldness to reach my -hand towards his neck with a design to stroke it, using the common style -and whistle of jockeys when they are going to handle a strange horse. -But this animal seeming to receive my civilities with disdain, shook his -head, and bent his brows, softly raising up his right forefoot to remove -my hand. Then he neighed three or four times, but in so different a -cadence, that I almost began to think he was speaking to himself in some -language of his own. - -While he and I were thus employed, another horse came up; who applying -himself to the first in a very formal manner, they gently struck each -other’s right hoof before, neighing several times by turns, and varying -the sound, which seemed to be almost articulate. They went some paces -off, as if it were to confer together, walking side by side, backwards -and forwards, like persons deliberating upon some affair of weight, but -often turning their eyes towards me, as it were to watch that I might not -escape. I was amazed to see such actions and behavior in brute beasts; -and concluded with myself, that if the inhabitants of this country were -indued with a proportionable degree of reason, they must needs be the -wisest people upon earth. This thought gave me so much comfort, that I -resolved to go forward until I could discover some house or village, -or meet with any of the natives, leaving the two horses to discourse -together as they pleased. But the first, who was a dapple gray, observing -me to steal off, neighed after me in so expressive a tone, that I fancied -myself to understand what he meant; whereupon I turned back, and came -near him, to expect his farther commands, but concealing my fear as much -as I could; for I began to be in some pain how this adventure might -terminate; and the reader will easily believe I did not much like my -present situation. - -The two horses came up close to me, looking with great earnestness upon -my face and hands. The gray steed rubbed my hat all round with his -right forehoof, and discomposed it so much that I was forced to adjust -it better by taking it off, and settling it again; whereat both he and -his companion (who was a brown bay) appeared to be much surprised; the -latter felt the lappet of my coat, and finding it to hang loose about -me, they both looked with new signs of wonder. He stroked my right hand, -seeming to admire the softness and color; but he squeezed it so hard -between his hoof and his pastern, that I was forced to roar; after which -they both touched me with all possible tenderness. They were under great -perplexity about my shoes and stockings, which they felt very often, -neighing to each other, and using various gestures, not unlike those of -a philosopher, when he would attempt to solve some new and difficult -phenomenon. - -Upon the whole, the behavior of these animals was so orderly and -rational, so acute and judicious, that I at last concluded they must -needs be magicians, who had thus metamorphosed themselves upon some -design, and seeing a stranger in the way, were resolved to divert -themselves with him; or perhaps were really amazed at the sight of a man -so very different in habit, feature, and complexion, from those who might -probably live in so remote a climate. Upon the strength of this reasoning -I ventured to address them in the following manner: “Gentlemen, if you -be conjurors, as I have good cause to believe, you can understand any -language; therefore I make bold to let your worships know that I am a -poor distressed Englishman, driven by his misfortunes upon your coast; -and I entreat one of you to let me ride upon his back, as if he were a -real horse, to some house or village where I can be relieved. In return -of which favor, I will make you a present of this knife and bracelet” -(taking them out of my pocket). The two creatures stood silent while I -spoke, seeming to listen with great attention; and when I had ended, they -neighed frequently towards each other, as if they were engaged in serious -conversation. I plainly observed that their language expressed the -passions very well, and the words might, with little pains, be resolved -into an alphabet more easily than the Chinese. - -I could frequently distinguish the word _yahoo_, which was repeated -by each of them several times; and although it was impossible for me -to conjecture what it meant, yet, while the two horses were busy in -conversation, I endeavored to practice this word upon my tongue; and as -soon as they were silent, boldly pronounced _yahoo_ in a loud voice, -imitating at the same time, as near as I could, the neighing of a horse; -at which they were both visibly surprised and the gray repeated the -same word twice, as if he meant to teach me the right accent, wherein -I spoke after him as well as I could, and found myself perceivably to -improve every time, though very far from any degree of perfection. Then -the bay tried me with a second word, much harder to be pronounced; but -reducing it to the English orthography may be spelt thus—Houyhnhnm. I -did not succeed in this so well as the former; but after two or three -farther trials, I had better fortune, and they both appeared amazed at my -capacity. - -After some farther discourse, which I then conjectured might relate -to me, the two friends took their leaves, with the same compliment of -striking each other’s hoof; and the gray made me signs that I should walk -before him, wherein I thought it prudent to comply, till I could find a -better director. When I offered to slacken my pace, he would cry, _Hhuun, -hhuun_. I guessed his meaning and gave him to understand, as well as I -could, that I was weary, and not able to walk faster; upon which he would -stand awhile to let me rest. - - - - -CHAPTER II - - THE AUTHOR CONDUCTED BY A HOUYHNHNM TO HIS HOUSE—THE HOUSE - DESCRIBED—THE AUTHOR’S RECEPTION—THE FOOD OF THE HOUYHNHNMS—THE - AUTHOR IN DISTRESS FOR WANT OF MEAT, IS AT LAST RELIEVED—HIS - MANNER OF FEEDING IN THIS COUNTRY. - - -Having traveled about three miles, we came to a long kind of building, -made of timber stuck in the ground, and wattled across; the roof was low, -and covered with straw. I now began to be a little comforted, and took -out some toys which travelers usually carry for presents to the savage -Indians of America and other parts, in hopes the people of the house -would be thereby encouraged to receive me kindly. The horse made me a -sign to go in first; it was a large room with a smooth clay floor, and a -rack and manger extending the whole length on one side. There were three -nags and two mares, not eating, but some of them sitting down upon their -hams, which I very much wondered at; but wondered more to see the rest -employed in domestic business. They seemed but ordinary cattle; however, -this confirmed my first opinion, that a people who could so far civilize -brute animals must needs excel in wisdom all the nations of the world. -The gray came in just after, and thereby prevented any ill treatment -which the others might have given me. He neighed to them several times in -a style of authority, and received answers. - -Beyond this room there were three others, reaching the length of the -house, to which you passed through three doors, opposite to each other, -in the manner of a vista; we went through the second room towards the -third. Here the gray walked in first, beckoning me to attend; I waited in -the second room, and got ready my presents for the master and mistress -of the house; they were two knives, three bracelets of false pearl, a -small looking-glass, and a bead necklace. The horse neighed three or four -times, and I waited to hear some answers in a human voice, but I heard no -other returns than in the same dialect, only one or two a little shriller -than his. I began to think that this house must belong to some person of -great note among them, because there appeared so much ceremony before I -could gain admittance. But, that a man of quality should be served all -by horses was beyond my comprehension. I feared my brain was disturbed -by my sufferings and misfortunes: I roused myself, and looked about me -in the room where I was left alone; this was furnished like the first, -only after a more elegant manner. I rubbed my eyes often, but the same -objects still occurred. I pinched my arms and sides to awake myself, -hoping I might be in a dream. I then absolutely concluded that all these -appearances could be nothing else but necromancy and magic. But I had no -time to pursue these reflections; for the gray horse came to the door, -and made me a sign to follow him into the third room, where I saw a very -comely mare, together with a colt and foal, sitting on their haunches -upon mats of straw, not unartfully made and perfectly neat and clean. - -The mare soon after my entrance rose from her mat, and coming up -close, after having nicely observed my hands and face, gave me a most -contemptuous look; then turning to the horse, I heard the word _yahoo_ -often repeated betwixt them; the meaning of which word I could not then -comprehend, although it were the first I had learned to pronounce; but I -was soon better informed, to my everlasting mortification; for the horse -beckoning to me with his head, and repeating the _hhuun, hhuun_, as he -did upon the road, which I understood was to attend him, led me out into -a kind of court, where was another building at some distance from the -house. Here we entered, and I saw three of these detestable creatures, -whom I first met after my landing, feeding upon roots, and the flesh of -some animals, which I afterwards found to be that of asses and dogs, -and now and then a cow, dead by accident or disease. They were all tied -by the neck with strong withes fastened to a beam; they held their food -between the claws of their forefeet, and tore it with their teeth. - -The master horse ordered a sorrel nag, one of his servants, to untie the -largest of these animals, and take him into the yard. The beast and I -were brought close together, and our countenances diligently compared -both by master and servant, who thereupon repeated several times the -word _yahoo_. My horror and astonishment are not to be described, when I -observed in this abominable animal, a perfect human figure; the face of -it indeed was flat and broad, the nose depressed, the lips large, and the -mouth wide; but these differences are common to all savage nations, where -the lineaments of the countenance are distorted by the natives suffering -their infants to lie groveling on the earth, or by carrying them on their -backs, nuzzling with their faces against the mother’s shoulders. The -forefoot of the _yahoo_ differed from my hands in nothing else but the -length of the nails, the coarseness and brownness of the palms, and the -hairiness on the backs. There was the same resemblance between our feet, -with the same differences, which I knew very well, though the horses did -not, because of my shoes and stockings; the same in every part of our -bodies, except as to hairiness and color, which I have already described. - -The great difficulty that seemed to stick with the two horses, was to see -the rest of my body so very different from that of a _yahoo_, for which -I was obliged to my clothes, whereof they had no conception. The sorrel -nag offered me a root, which he held (after their manner, which we shall -describe in its proper place) between his hoof and pastern; I took it -in my hand, and having smelt it, returned it to him again as civilly as -I could. He brought out of the _yahoo’s_ kennel a piece of ass’s flesh, -but it smelt so offensively that I turned from it with loathing; he then -threw it to the _yahoo_, by whom it was greedily devoured. He afterwards -showed me a wisp of hay, and a fetlock full of oats; but I shook my -head, to signify that neither of these were food for me. And indeed I -now apprehended that I must absolutely starve, if I did not get to some -of my own species; for as to those filthy _yahoos_, although there were -few greater lovers of mankind at that time than myself, yet I confess -I never saw any sensitive being so detestable on all accounts; and the -more I came near them the more hateful they grew, while I stayed in that -country. This the master horse observed by my behavior, and therefore -sent the _yahoo_ back to his kennel. He then put his forehoof to his -mouth, at which I was much surprised, although he did it with ease, and -with a motion that appeared perfectly natural; and made other signs to -know what I would eat; but I could not return him such an answer as he -was able to apprehend; and if he had understood me, I did not see how I -was possibly to contrive any way for finding myself nourishment. While -we were thus engaged, I observed a cow passing by, whereupon I pointed -to her, and expressed a desire to go and milk her. This had its effect; -for he led me back into the house, and ordered a mare-servant to open a -room, where a good store of milk lay in earthen and wooden vessels, after -a very orderly and cleanly manner. She gave me a large bowlful, of which -I drank very heartily, and found myself well refreshed. - -[Illustration: “_I saw coming towards the house a kind of vehicle drawn -like a sledge by four yahoos_” - -_Page 261_] - -About noon, I saw coming towards the house a kind of vehicle drawn like a -sledge by four _yahoos_. There was in it an old steed, who seemed to be -of quality; he alighted with his hindfeet forward, having by accident got -hurt in his left forefoot. He came to dine with our horse, who received -him with great civility. They dined in the best room, and had oats -boiled in milk for the second course, which the old horse ate warm, but -the rest cold. Their mangers were placed circular in the middle of the -room, and divided into several partitions, round which they sat on their -haunches, upon bosses of straw. In the middle was a large rack, with -angles answering to every partition of the manger; so that each horse and -mare ate their own hay, and their own mash of oats and milk, with much -decency and regularity. The behavior of the young colt and foal appeared -very modest, and that of the master and mistress extremely cheerful and -complaisant to their guest. The gray ordered me to stand by him; and much -discourse passed between him and his friend concerning me, as I found by -the stranger’s often looking on me, and the frequent repetition of the -word _yahoo_. - -I happened to wear my gloves, which the master gray observing, seemed -perplexed, discovering signs of wonder what I had done to my forefeet; he -put his hoof three or four times to them, as if he would signify that I -should reduce them to their former shape, which I presently did, pulling -off both my gloves, and putting them into my pocket. - -This occasioned farther talk, and I saw the company was pleased with my -behavior, whereof I soon found the good effects. I was ordered to speak -the few words I understood; and while they were at dinner, the master -taught me the names for oats, milk, fire, water, and some others; which I -could readily pronounce after him, having from my youth a great facility -for learning languages. - -When dinner was done, the master horse took me aside, and by signs and -words made me understand the concern he was in that I had nothing to -eat. Oats in their tongue are called _hluunh_. This word I pronounced -two or three times; for although I had refused them at first, yet upon -second thoughts I considered that I could contrive to make of them a -kind of bread, which might be sufficient, with milk, to keep me alive, -till I could make my escape to some other country, and to creatures of -my own species. The horse immediately ordered a white mare-servant of -his family to bring me a good quantity of oats in a sort of wooden tray. -These I heated before the fire, as well as I could, and rubbed them till -the husks came off, which I made a shift to winnow from the grain: I -ground and beat them between two stones, then took water, and made them -into a kind of paste or cake, which I toasted at the fire, and ate warm -with milk. It was at first a very insipid diet, though common enough in -many parts of Europe, but grew tolerable by time; and having been often -reduced to hard fare in my life, this was not the first experiment I had -made how easily nature is satisfied. And I cannot but observe, that I -never had one hour’s sickness while I stayed in this island. ’Tis true -I sometimes made a shift to catch a rabbit or bird, by springs made of -_yahoo’s_ hairs; and I often gathered wholesome herbs, which I boiled -or ate as salads with my bread; and now and then, for a rarity, I made -a little butter and drank the whey. I was at first at a great loss for -salt, but custom soon reconciled me to the want of it; and I am confident -that the frequent use of salt among us is an effect of luxury, and was -first introduced as a provocative to drink, except where it is necessary -for preserving of flesh in long voyages, or in places remote from great -markets: for we observe no animal to be fond of it but man; and as to -myself, when I left this country, it was a great while before I could -endure the taste of it in anything that I ate. - -This is enough to say upon the subject of my diet, wherewith other -travelers fill their books, as if the readers were personally concerned -whether we fared well or ill. However, it was necessary to mention this -matter, lest the world should think it impossible that I could find -sustenance for three years in such a country, and among such inhabitants. - -When it grew towards evening, the master horse ordered a place for me to -lodge in; it was but six yards from the house, and separated from the -stable of the _yahoos_. Here I got some straw, and covering myself with -my own clothes, slept very sound. But I was in a very short time better -accommodated, as the reader shall know hereafter, when I come to treat -more particularly about my way of living. - - - - -CHAPTER III - - THE AUTHOR STUDIOUS TO LEARN THE LANGUAGE—THE HOUYHNHNM HIS - MASTER ASSISTS IN TEACHING HIM—THE LANGUAGE DESCRIBED—SEVERAL - HOUYHNHNMS OF QUALITY COME OUT OF CURIOSITY TO SEE THE - AUTHOR—HE GIVES HIS MASTER A SHORT ACCOUNT OF HIS VOYAGE. - - -My principal endeavor was to learn the language, which my master (for so -I shall henceforth call him) and his children, and every servant of his -house, were desirous to teach me; for they looked upon it as a prodigy -that a brute animal should discover such marks of a rational creature. I -pointed to everything, and inquired the name of it, which I wrote down -in my journal book when I was alone, and corrected my bad accent, by -desiring those of the family to pronounce it often. In this employment, a -sorrel nag, one of the under servants, was ready to assist me. - -In speaking, they pronounce through the nose and throat, and their -language approaches nearest to the High Dutch or German, of any I know in -Europe; but it is much more graceful and significant. The emperor Charles -V. made almost the same observation when he said that if he were to speak -to his horse, it should be in High Dutch. - -The curiosity and impatience of my master were so great that he spent -many hours of his leisure to instruct me. He was convinced (as he -afterwards told me) that I must be a _yahoo_, but my teachableness, -civility, and cleanliness, astonished him; which were qualities -altogether so opposite to those animals. He was most perplexed about my -clothes, reasoning sometimes with himself, whether they were a part of -my body; for I never pulled them off till the family were asleep, and -got them on before they waked in the morning. My master was eager to -learn whence I came; how I acquired those appearances of reason which I -discovered in all my actions; and to know my story from my own mouth, -which he hoped he should soon do by the great proficiency I made in -learning and pronouncing their words and sentences. To help my memory, I -formed all I learned in the English alphabet, and wrote the words down, -with the translations. This last, after some time, I ventured to do in my -master’s presence. It cost me much trouble to explain to him what I was -doing; for the inhabitants have not the least idea of books or literature. - -In about ten weeks’ time I was able to understand most of his questions; -and in three months could give him some tolerable answers. He was -extremely curious to know from what part of the country I came, and how -I was taught to imitate a rational creature; because the _yahoos_ (whom -he saw I exactly resembled in my head, hands and face, that were only -visible), with some appearance of cunning, and the strongest disposition -to mischief, were observed to be the most unteachable of all brutes, I -answered that I came over the sea from a far place, with many others of -my own kind, in a great hollow vessel made of the bodies of trees; that -my companions forced me to land on this coast, and then left me to shift -for myself. It was with some difficulty, and by the help of many signs, -that I brought him to understand me. He replied, that I must needs be -mistaken, or that I said the thing which was not. (For they have no -word in their language to express lying or falsehood.) He knew it was -impossible that there could be a country beyond the sea, or that a parcel -of brutes could move a wooden vessel whither they pleased upon water. He -was sure no Houyhnhnm alive could make such a vessel, nor would trust -_yahoos_ to manage it. - -The word Houyhnhnm, in their tongue, signifies a horse, and, in its -etymology, the perfection of nature. I told my master that I was at a -loss for expression, but would improve as fast as I could; and hoped in -a short time I should be able to tell him wonders. He was pleased to -direct his own mare, his colt and foal, and the servants of the family, -to take all opportunities of instructing me; and every day, for two or -three hours, he was at the same pains himself; several horses and mares -of quality in the neighborhood came often to our house upon the report -spread of a wonderful _yahoo_, that could speak like a Houyhnhnm, and -seemed in his words and actions to discover some glimmerings of reason. -These delighted to converse with me; they put many questions and received -such answers as I was able to return. By all these advantages I made -so great a progress, that in five months from my arrival, I understood -whatever was spoken, and could express myself tolerably well. - -The Houyhnhnms who came to visit my master out of a design of seeing and -talking with me, could hardly believe me to be a right _yahoo_, because -my body had a different covering from others of my kind. They were -astonished to observe me without the usual hair or skin, except on my -head, face, and hands; but I discovered that secret to my master upon an -accident which happened about a fortnight before. - -I have already told the reader, that every night, when the family were -gone to bed, it was my custom to strip, and cover myself with my clothes: -it happened one morning early, that my master sent for me by the sorrel -nag, who was his valet; when he came I was fast asleep, my clothes -fallen off on one side, and my shirt above my waist. I awaked at the -noise he made, and observed him to deliver his message in some disorder; -after which he went to my master, and in a great fright gave him a very -confused account of what he had seen. This I presently discovered; for -going as soon as I was dressed to pay attendance upon his honor, he asked -me the meaning of what his servant had reported, that I was not the same -thing when I slept as I appeared to be at other times. - -I had hitherto concealed the secret of my dress, in order to distinguish -myself as much as possible from that cursed race of _yahoos_; but now -I found it in vain to do so any longer. Besides, I considered that my -clothes and shoes would soon wear out, which already were in a declining -condition, and must be supplied by some contrivance from the hides of -_yahoos_ or other brutes; whereby the whole secret would be known. I -therefore told my master that in the country whence I came, those of -my kind always covered their bodies with the hairs of certain animals -prepared by art, as well for decency as to avoid the inclemencies of -air, both hot and cold; of which, as to my own person, I would give him -immediate conviction, if he pleased to command me. Whereupon I first -unbuttoned my coat, and pulled it off. I did the same with my waistcoat. -I drew off my shoes, stockings, and breeches. - -My master observed the whole performance with great signs of curiosity -and admiration. He took up all my clothes in his pastern, one piece -after another, and examined them diligently; he then stroked my body -very gently, and looked round me several times; after which he said, it -was plain I must be a perfect _yahoo_; but that I differed very much -from the rest of my species, in the softness, whiteness, and smoothness -of my skin; my want of hair on several parts of my body; the shape and -shortness of my claws behind and before; and my affectation of walking -continually on my two hinder feet. He desired to see no more; and gave me -leave to put on my clothes again, for I was shuddering with cold. - -I expressed my uneasiness at his giving me so often the appellation -of _yahoo_, an odious animal, for which I had so utter a hatred and -contempt; I begged he would forbear applying that word to me, and take -the same order in his family and among his friends whom he suffered -to see me. I requested likewise, that the secret of my having a false -covering to my body might be known to none but himself, at least as long -as my present clothing should last; for, as to what the sorrel nag, his -valet, had observed, his honor might command him to conceal it. - -All this my master very graciously consented to, and thus the secret was -kept till my clothes began to wear out, which I was forced to supply by -several contrivances that shall hereafter be mentioned. In the meantime, -he desired I would go on with my utmost diligence to learn their -language, because he was more astonished at my capacity for speech and -reason, than at the figure of my body, whether it were covered or no; -adding, that he waited with some impatience to hear the wonders which I -promised to tell him. - -Thenceforward he doubled the pains he had been at to instruct me; he -brought me into all company, and made them treat me with civility, -because, as he told them privately, this would put me into good humor, -and make me more diverting. - -Every day, when I waited on him, besides the trouble he was at in -teaching, he would ask me several questions concerning myself, which I -answered as well as I could; and by these means he had already received -some general ideas, though very imperfect. It would be tedious to relate -the several steps by which I advanced to a more regular conversation, but -the first account I gave of myself in any order and length was to this -purpose: - -That I came from a very far country, as I already had attempted to tell -him, with about fifty more of my own species; that we traveled upon the -seas in a great hollow vessel made of wood, and larger than his honor’s -house. I described the ship to him in the best terms I could, and -explained, by the help of my handkerchief displayed, how it was driven -forward by the wind. That upon a quarrel among us, I was set on shore -on this coast, where I walked forward, without knowing whither, till he -delivered me from the persecution of those execrable yahoos. He asked -me who made the ship, and how it was possible that the Houyhnhnms of -my country would leave it to the management of brutes. My answer was, -that I durst proceed no farther in my relation, unless he would give me -his word and honor that he would not be offended, and then I would tell -him the wonders I had so often promised. He agreed; and I went on by -assuring him that the ship was made by creatures like myself, who, in -all the countries I had traveled, as well as in my own, were the only -governing, rational animals; and that upon my arrival hither I was as -much astonished to see the Houyhnhnms act like rational beings, as he or -his friends could be in finding some marks of reason in a creature he -was pleased to call a _yahoo_, to which I owned my resemblance in every -part, but could not account for their degenerate and brutal nature. I -said farther, that if good fortune ever restored me to my native country, -to relate my travels hither, as I resolved to do, everybody would believe -that I said the thing which was not; that I invented the story out of -my own head; and—with all possible respect to himself, his family, and -friends, and under his promise of not being offended—our countrymen -would hardly think it probable that a Houyhnhnm should be the presiding -creature of a nation, and a _yahoo_ the brute. - - - - -CHAPTER IV - - THE HOUYHNHNMS’ NOTION OF TRUTH AND FALSEHOOD—THE AUTHOR’S - DISCOURSE DISAPPROVED BY HIS MASTER—THE AUTHOR GIVES A MORE - PARTICULAR ACCOUNT OF HIMSELF, AND THE ACCIDENTS OF HIS VOYAGE. - - -My master heard me with great appearances of uneasiness in his -countenance; because doubting or not believing, are so little known in -this country, that the inhabitants cannot tell how to behave themselves -under such circumstances; and I remember, in frequent discourses with my -master concerning the nature of manhood, in other parts of the world, -having occasion to talk of lying and false representation, it was with -much difficulty that he comprehended what I meant, although he had -otherwise a most acute judgment. For he argued thus: that the use of -speech was to make us understand one another, and to receive information -of facts; now, if any one said the thing which was not, these ends were -defeated, because I cannot properly be said to understand him; and I -am so far from receiving information, that he leaves me worse than in -ignorance, for I am led to believe a thing black when it is white, and -short when it is long. And these were all the notions he had concerning -that faculty of lying, so perfectly well understood among human creatures. - -To return from this digression: When I asserted that the _yahoos_ -were the only governing animals in my country, which my master said -was altogether past his conception, he desired to know whether we had -Houyhnhnms among us, and what was their employment. I told him we had -great numbers; that in summer they grazed in the fields, and in winter -were kept in houses, with hay and oats, where _yahoo_ servants were -employed to rub their skins smooth, comb their manes, pick their feet, -serve them with food, and make their beds. “I understand you well,” said -my master; “it is very plain, from all you have spoken, that whatever -share of reason the _yahoos_ pretend to, the Houyhnhnms are your masters. -I heartily wish our _yahoos_ would be so tractable.” I begged his honor -would please excuse me from proceeding any farther, because I was very -certain that the account he expected from me would be highly displeasing. -But he insisted in commanding me to let him know the best and the worst. -I told him he should be obeyed. I owned that the Houyhnhnms among us, -whom we called horses, were the most generous and comely animals we had; -that they excelled in strength and swiftness; and when they belonged -to persons of quality, were employed in traveling, racing, or drawing -chariots; they were treated with much kindness and care, till they fell -into diseases, or became foundered in the feet; and then they were sold, -and used to all kind of drudgery till they died; after which their skins -were stripped, and sold for what they were worth, and their bodies left -to be devoured by dogs and birds of prey. But the common race of horses -had not so good fortune, being kept by farmers and carriers and other -mean people, who put them to great labor, and fed them worse. I described -as well as I could, our way of riding; the shape and use of a bridle, -a saddle, a spur, and a whip; of harness and wheels. I added, that we -fastened plates of a certain hard substance, called iron, at the bottom -of their feet, to preserve their hoofs from being broken by the stony -ways on which we often traveled. - -My master, after some expressions of great indignation, wondered how -we dared to venture upon a Houyhnhnm’s back; for he was sure, that the -weakest servant in his house would be able to shake off the strongest -_yahoo_; or by lying down, and rolling on his back, squeeze the brute to -death. I answered that our horses were trained up, from three or four -years old, to the several uses we intended them for; that if any of them -proved intolerably vicious, they were employed for carriages; that they -were severely beaten, while they were young, for any mischievous tricks; -that they were indeed sensible of rewards and punishments; but his honor -would please to consider, that they had not the least tincture of reason, -any more than the _yahoos_ in this country. - -It put me to the pains of many circumlocutions, to give my master a right -idea of what I spoke; for their language does not abound in variety of -words, because their wants and passions are fewer than among us. But it -is impossible to represent his noble resentment at our savage treatment -of the Houyhnhnm race. He said, if it were possible there could be any -country where _yahoos_ alone were indued with reason, they certainly -must be the governing animal; because reason in time will always prevail -against brutal strength. But, considering the frames of our bodies, -and especially of mine, he thought no creature of equal bulk was so -ill contrived for employing that reason in the common offices of life; -whereupon he desired to know whether those among whom I lived resembled -me or the _yahoos_ of this country. I assured him that I was as well -shaped as most of my age; but the younger, and the females, were much -more soft and tender, and the skins of the latter generally as white -as milk. He said I differed indeed from other _yahoos_, being much more -cleanly, and not altogether so deformed; but, in point of real advantage, -he thought I differed for the worse: that my nails were of no use either -to my fore or hinder feet; as to my forefeet, he could not properly call -them by that name, for he never observed me to walk upon them; that -they were too soft to bear the ground; that I generally went with them -uncovered; neither was the covering I sometimes wore on them of the same -shape, or so strong as that on my feet behind; that I could not walk with -any security, for if either of my hinder feet slipped, I must inevitably -fall. He then began to find fault with other parts of my body: the -flatness of my face, the prominence of my nose, my eyes placed directly -in front, so that I could not look on either side without turning my -head. That I was not able to feed myself, without lifting one of my -forefeet to my mouth; and therefore nature had placed those joints to -answer that necessity. He knew not what could be the use of those several -clefts and divisions in my feet behind; that these were too soft to bear -the hardness and sharpness of stones without a covering made from the -skin of some other brute; that my whole body wanted a fence against heat -and cold, which I was forced to put on and off every day with tediousness -and trouble. And lastly, that he observed every animal in this country -naturally to abhor the _yahoos_, whom the weaker avoided and the stronger -drove from them. So that, supposing us to have the gift of reason, he -could not see how it were possible to cure that natural antipathy which -every creature discovered against us; nor consequently, how we could tame -and render them serviceable. However, he would, as he said, debate the -matter no farther, because he was more desirous to know my own story, the -country where I was born, and the several actions and events of my life -before I came hither. - -I assured him how extremely desirous I was that he should be satisfied -on every point; but I doubted much, whether it would be possible for -me to explain myself on several subjects whereof his honor could have -no conception; because I saw nothing in his country to which I could -resemble them. That, however, I would do my best, and strive to express -myself by similitudes, humbly desiring his assistance when I wanted -proper words; which he was pleased to promise me. - -I said my birth was of honest parents, in an island called England, which -was remote from this country, as many days’ journey as the strongest of -his honor’s servants could travel in the annual course of the sun; that -I was bred a surgeon, whose trade it is to cure wounds and hurts in the -body, got by accident or violence; that my country was governed by a -female man, called a queen; that I left it to get riches whereby I might -maintain myself and family when I should return; that in my last voyage, -I was commander of the ship, and had about fifty _yahoos_ under me, many -of which died at sea, and I was forced to supply them by others picked -out from several nations; that our ship was twice in danger of being -sunk, the first time by a great storm, and the second by striking against -a rock. Here my master interposed, by asking me how I could persuade -strangers out of different countries to venture with me, after the losses -I had sustained, and the hazards I had run. I said they were fellows of -desperate fortunes, forced to fly from the places of their birth on -account of their poverty or their crimes. Some were undone by lawsuits; -others spent all they had in drinking and gaming; others fled for -treason; many for murder, theft, poisoning, robbery, perjury, forgery, -coining false money, for flying from their colors, or deserting to the -enemy; and most of them had broken prison; none of these durst return to -their native countries, for fear of being hanged, or of starving in a -jail; and therefore were under the necessity of seeking a livelihood in -other places. - -During this discourse my master was pleased to interrupt me several -times. I had made use of many circumlocutions in describing to him the -nature of several crimes for which most of our crew had been forced to -fly their country. This labor took up several days’ conversation before -he was able to comprehend me. He was wholly at a loss to know what could -be the use or necessity of practicing those vices. To clear up which I -endeavored to give him some idea of the desire of power and riches; of -the terrible effects of lust, intemperance, malice, and envy. All this -I was forced to define and describe by putting of cases and making of -suppositions. After which, like one whose imagination was struck with -something never seen or heard of before, he would lift up his eyes with -amazement and indignation. Power, government, war, law, punishment, and -a thousand other things had no terms wherein that language could express -them; which made the difficulty almost insuperable to give my master any -conception of what I meant. But, being of an excellent understanding, -much improved by contemplation and converse, he at last arrived at a -competent knowledge of what human nature, in our parts of the world, is -capable to perform, and desired I would give him some particular account -of that land which we call Europe, but especially of my own country. - -[Illustration] - - - - -CHAPTER V - - THE AUTHOR AT HIS MASTER’S COMMAND, INFORMS HIM OF THE STATE - OF ENGLAND—THE CAUSES OF WAR AMONG THE PRINCES OF EUROPE—THE - AUTHOR BEGINS TO EXPLAIN THE ENGLISH CONSTITUTION. - - -The reader may please to observe that the following extract of many of -the conversations I had with my master, contains a summary of the most -material points, which were discoursed at several times for above two -years; his honor often desiring fuller satisfaction as I farther improved -in the Houyhnhnm tongue. I laid before him, as well as I could, the -whole state of Europe; I discoursed of trade and manufactures, of arts -and sciences; and the answers I gave to all the questions he made, as -they arose upon several subjects, were a fund of conversation not to be -exhausted. But I shall here only set down the substance of what passed -between us concerning my own country, reducing it into order as well as I -can, without any regard to time or other circumstances, while I strictly -adhere to truth. My only concern is, that I shall hardly be able to do -justice to my master’s arguments and expressions, which must needs suffer -by my want of capacity, as well as by a translation into our barbarous -English. - -In obedience, therefore, to his honor’s commands, I related to him the -revolution under the Prince of Orange, the long war with France entered -into by the said prince, and renewed by his successor, the present queen; -wherein the greatest powers of Christendom were engaged, and which still -continued. I computed, at his request, that about a million of _yahoos_ -might have been killed in the whole progress of it; and perhaps a hundred -or more cities taken, and thrice as many ships burnt or sunk. - -He asked me what were the usual causes or motives that made one country -go to war with another. I answered, they were innumerable; but I should -only mention a few of the chief. Sometimes the ambition of princes, -who never think they have land or people enough to govern; sometimes -the corruption of ministers, who engage their master in a war in order -to stifle or divert the clamor of the subjects against their evil -administration. Difference in opinions has cost many millions of lives: -for instance, whether flesh be bread, or bread be flesh; whether the -juice of a certain berry be blood or wine; whether whistling be a vice or -virtue; whether it be better to kiss a post or throw it into the fire; -what is the best color for a coat, whether black, white, red, or gray, -and whether it should be long or short, narrow or wide, dirty or clean, -with many more. Neither are any wars so furious and bloody, or of so long -continuance, as those occasioned by difference in opinion, especially if -it be in things indifferent. - -Sometimes the quarrel between two princes is to decide which of them -shall dispossess a third of his dominions, where neither of them pretend -to any right. Sometimes one prince quarrels with another, for fear the -other should quarrel with him. Sometimes a war is entered upon, because -the enemy is too strong, and sometimes because he is too weak. Sometimes -our neighbors want the things which we have, or have the things which we -want, and we both fight, till they take ours, or give us theirs. It is -a very justifiable cause of war to invade a country after the people -have been wasted by famine, destroyed by pestilence, or embroiled by -factions among themselves. It is justifiable to enter into war against -our nearest ally, when one of his towns lies convenient for us, or a -territory of land that would render our dominions round and complete. -If a prince sends forces into a nation where the people are poor and -ignorant, he may lawfully put half of them to death, and make slaves of -the rest, in order to civilize and reduce them from their barbarous way -of living. It is a very kingly, honorable, and frequent practice, when -one prince desires the assistance of another to secure him against an -invasion, that the assistant, when he has driven out the invader, should -seize on the dominions himself, and kill, imprison, or banish the prince -he came to relieve. Alliance by blood or marriage, is a frequent cause of -war between princes; and the nearer the kindred is, the greater is their -disposition to quarrel. Poor nations are hungry, and rich nations are -proud, and pride and hunger will ever be at variance. For these reasons, -the trade of a soldier is held the most honorable of all others; because -a soldier is a _yahoo_ hired to kill in cold blood as many of his own -species, who have never offended him, as possibly he can. - -There is likewise a kind of princes in Europe, not able to make war by -themselves, who hire out their troops to richer nations, for so much a -day to each man; of which they keep three-fourths to themselves, and it -is the best part of their maintenance; such are those in many northern -parts of Europe. - -“What you have told me,” said my master, “upon the subject of war, does -indeed discover most admirably the effects of that reason you pretend -to: however, it is happy that the shame is greater than the danger; and -that nature has left you utterly incapable of doing much mischief. For -your mouths lying flat with your faces, you can hardly bite each other -to any purpose, unless by consent. Then as to the claws upon your feet -before and behind, they are so short and tender, that one of our _yahoos_ -would drive a dozen of yours before him. And therefore in recounting the -numbers of those who have been killed in battle, I cannot but think you -have said the thing which is not.” - -I could not forbear shaking my head and smiling a little at his -ignorance. And being no stranger to the art of war, I gave him a -description of cannons, culverins, muskets, carabines, pistols, bullets, -powder, swords, bayonets, sieges, retreats, attacks, undermines, -countermines, bombardments, sea fights; ships sunk with a thousand men, -twenty thousand killed on each side; dying groans, limbs flying in the -air, smoke, noise, confusion, trampling to death under horses’ feet; -flight, pursuit, victory; fields strewed with carcasses, left for food to -dogs, and wolves, and birds of prey; plundering, stripping, ravishing, -burning, and destroying. And, to set forth the valor of my own dear -countrymen, I assured him that I had seen them blow up a hundred enemies -at once in a siege, and as many in a ship, and beheld the dead bodies -drop down in pieces from the clouds, to the great diversion of the -spectators. - -I was going on to more particulars, when my master commanded me silence. -He said, whoever understood the nature of _yahoos_ might easily believe -it possible for so vile an animal to be capable of every action I had -named, if their strength and cunning equaled their malice. But as my -discourse had increased his abhorrence of the whole species, so he -found it gave him a disturbance in his mind, to which he was wholly -a stranger before. He thought his ears being used to such abominable -words, might by degrees admit them with less detestation. That although -he hated the _yahoos_ of this country, yet he no more blamed them for -their odious qualities than he did a _gnnayh_ (a bird of prey) for its -cruelty, or a sharp stone for cutting his hoof. But when a creature -pretending to reason could be capable of such enormities, he dreaded lest -the corruption of that faculty might be worse than brutality itself. -He seemed therefore confident, that instead of reason, we were only -possessed of some quality fitted to increase our natural vices; as the -reflection from a troubled stream returns the image of an ill-shapen -body, not only larger, but more distorted. - -He added that he had heard too much upon the subject of war, both -in this and some former discourses. There was another point which a -little perplexed him at present. I had informed him that some of our -crew left their country on account of being ruined by law; that I had -already explained the meaning of the word; but he was at a loss how -it should come to pass, that the law, which was intended for every -man’s preservation, should be any man’s ruin. Therefore he desired to -be farther satisfied what I meant by law, and what sort of dispensers -they could be by whose practices the property of any person could be -lost instead of preserved. He added that he saw no occasion for this -thing called law, as all its intents and purposes might be answered by -following the dictates of nature and reason, which were sufficient guides -for a reasonable animal, as we pretended to be, in showing us what we -ought to do, and what to avoid. - -I assured his honor that law was a science in which I was little -conversant, having only such knowledge of it as I had obtained by -employing advocates, in vain, upon some injustices that had been done me, -and by conversing with others who by the same method had first lost their -substance and then left their country under the mortification of such -disappointments. However, I would give him all the satisfaction I was -able. - -I said that those who professed this science were exceedingly numerous, -being almost equal to the caterpillars in number; they were of diverse -degrees, distinctions, and denominations. Their number was such that -the fair and justifiable advantage and income of the profession was not -sufficient for the decent and handsome maintenance of multitudes who -followed it. The result was that it was found needful to supply that -by artifice and cunning which could not be procured by just and honest -methods; the better to bring which about, there was among us a society of -men bred from their youth in the art of proving, by words multiplied for -the purpose, that white is black, and black is white, according as they -are paid. The greatness of the assurance of these men, and the boldness -of their pretensions, gained the adherence of the mass of the people, -of whom in a manner they made slaves, and got into their hands much the -largest share of the practice of their profession. These practitioners -were by men of discernment called pettifoggers (that is, confounders, -or rather, destroyers of right), and it was my ill luck as well as the -misfortune of my acquaintances, to have been at the mercy of this species -of the profession. I desired his honor to understand the description I -had to give, and the ruin I had complained of, related to these sectaries -only, and the means by which the misfortunes we met had been brought upon -us by these men might be more easily conceived by explaining to him their -method of proceeding, which could not better be done than by giving him -an example. - -I will suppose that my neighbor has a mind to my cow; he hires one of -these advocates to prove that he ought to have my cow from me. I must -then hire another to defend my right, it being against all rules of law -that any man shall be allowed to speak for himself. Now, in this case, -I who am the right owner, lie under two great disadvantages. First, my -advocate, being practiced almost from the cradle in defending falsehood, -is quite out of his element when he would argue for right, which, being -unnatural to him, he attempts with great awkwardness, if not with ill -will. The second disadvantage is that my advocate must proceed with great -caution, for since the maintenance of so many depends on the practice of -law not being lessened by too summary proceedings, even should he fail to -incur the displeasure of the judges he is sure to gain the ill will and -hatred of his brethren. This being the case, I have but two methods to -preserve my cow. The first is to gain over my adversary’s advocate with -a double fee, his education being such that it is reasonable to expect -he can be induced to betray his client and let the balance fall on my -side. The second way is for my advocate to refrain from insisting on the -justice of my cause, by allowing the cow to belong to my adversary; -and this, if it be skillfully done, will go a long way toward obtaining -a favorable verdict, it having been found by careful observation of -issues and events, that under the management of such practitioners, -the wrong side has the fairer chance of success, more especially if it -should happen, as it did in my own and my friend’s case, that the person -appointed to decide all controversies concerning property as well as -to try criminals, who should be chosen from among the most learned and -wise of his profession, is by the recommendation of a great favorite or -court mistress taken from the sect before mentioned, and so having been -strongly biased all his life against equity and fair dealing, lies, as it -were, under a fatal necessity of favoring, double dealing and oppression, -and besides, through age, infirmity, and distemper having become lazy and -inattentive, he is almost incapacitated from doing anything becoming the -duty of his office. The decisions of men so bred and qualified may with -reason be expected to be on the wrong side of the cause, for it is little -wonder that those who can take harangue and noise (if pursued with warmth -and drawn out to great length) for reasoning, will infer the weight of -the argument from the heaviness of the pleading. - -It is a maxim among these men that whatever has been done before may -legally be done again, and therefore they take special care to record -all the decisions formerly made, even those which have through ignorance -or corruption contradicted the rules of common justice. These, under the -name of precedents, they produce as authorities, and thereby endeavor -to justify the most iniquitous opinions; and they are so lucky in this -practice that they rarely fail to secure decrees according to their -expectation. - -In pleading, they studiously avoid entering into the merits of the cause; -but are loud, violent, and tedious in dwelling upon all circumstances -which are not to the purpose. For instance, in the case already -mentioned, they never desire to know what claim or title my adversary has -to my cow; but whether the said cow were red or black; her horns long or -short; whether the field I grazed her in be round or square; whether she -was milked at home or abroad; what diseases she is subject to, and the -like; after which they consult precedents, adjourn the cause from time to -time, and in ten, twenty, or thirty years come to an issue. - -It is likewise to be observed, that this society has a peculiar cant and -jargon of their own, that no other mortal can understand, and wherein all -their laws are written, which they take special care to multiply; whereby -they have gone near to confound the very essence of truth and falsehood, -of right and wrong; so that it may take thirty years to decide whether -the field, left me by my ancestors for six generations, belongs to me or -to a stranger three hundred miles off. - -In the trial of persons accused for crimes against the state, the method -is much more short and commendable: for if those in power, who know well -how to select instruments fit to carry out their purpose, are careful to -recommend a proper person, his course of education and method of practice -make it easy for him, when his patron’s disposition is understood, -without difficulty either to condemn or acquit the criminal and at the -same time strictly preserve all due forms of law. - -Here my master interposing said it was a pity that creatures endowed with -such prodigious abilities of mind as these advocates by the description -of them must certainly be, were not rather encouraged to be instructors -of others in wisdom and knowledge. In answer to which I assured his honor -that the business and study of their own profession so took up all their -thoughts and time, that they attended to nothing else, and therefore -in all points out of their own trade many of them were so ignorant -and stupid that it would be difficult to pick out of any profession a -generation of men more despicable in common conversation or so much -looked upon as avowed enemies of all knowledge and learning, and equally -disposed to pervert the general reasons of mankind in every other subject -of discourse, as in that of their own calling. - - - - -CHAPTER VI - - A CONTINUATION OF THE STATE OF ENGLAND UNDER QUEEN ANNE—THE - CHARACTER OF A FIRST MINISTER OF STATE IN SOME EUROPEAN COURTS. - - -My master was yet wholly at a loss to understand what motives could -incite this race of lawyers to perplex, disquiet, and weary themselves, -and engage in a confederacy of injustice, merely for the sake of injuring -their fellow animals; neither could he comprehend what I meant in saying -they did it for hire. Whereupon I was at much pains to describe to him -the use of money, the materials it was made of, and the value of the -metals; that when a _yahoo_ had got a great store of this precious -substance, he was able to purchase whatever he had a mind to, the finest -clothing, the noblest houses, great tracts of land, the most costly meats -and drinks, and have his choice of the most beautiful females. Therefore -since money alone was able to perform all these feats, our _yahoos_ -thought they could never have enough of it to spend or save, as they -found themselves inclined from their natural bent either to profusion or -avarice. That the rich man enjoyed the fruit of the poor man’s labor, and -the latter were a thousand to one in proportion to the former. That the -bulk of our people were forced to live miserably, by laboring every day -for small wages to make a few live plentifully. I enlarged myself much -on these and many other particulars to the same purpose. But his honor -was still to seek; for he went upon a supposition that all animals had -a title to their share in the productions of the earth, and especially -those who presided over the rest. Therefore he desired I would let him -know what these costly meats were, and how any of us happened to want -them. Whereupon I enumerated as many sorts as came into my head, with -the various methods of dressing them, which could not be done without -sending vessels by sea to every part of the world, as well for liquors to -drink as for sauces, and innumerable other conveniencies. I assured him -that this whole globe of earth must be at least three times gone round, -before one of our better female _yahoos_ could get her breakfast, or a -cup to put it in. He said that must needs be a miserable country which -cannot furnish food for its own inhabitants. But what he chiefly wondered -at was how such vast tracts of ground as I described should be wholly -without fresh water, and the people put to the necessity of sending over -the sea for drink. I replied that England (the dear place of my nativity) -was computed to produce three times the quantity of food more than its -inhabitants are able to consume, as well as liquors extracted from grain, -or pressed out of the fruit of certain trees, which made excellent drink; -and the same proportion in every other convenience of life. But, in order -to feed the luxury and intemperance of the males, and the vanity of the -females, we sent away the greatest part of our necessary things to other -countries, whence in return we brought the materials of diseases, folly, -and vice, to spend among ourselves. Hence it follows of necessity, that -vast numbers of our people are compelled to seek their livelihood by -begging, robbing, stealing, cheating, flattering, suborning, forswearing, -forging, gaming, lying, fawning, hectoring, voting, scribbling, -star-gazing, poisoning, canting, libeling, free-thinking, and the like -occupations; every one of which terms I was at much pains to make him -understand. - -That wine was not imported among us from foreign countries to supply the -want of water or other drinks, but because it was a sort of liquid which -made us merry by putting us out of our senses; diverted all melancholy -thoughts, begat wild extravagant imaginations in the brain, raised our -hopes and banished our fears, suspended every office of reason for a time -and deprived us of the use of our limbs till we fell into a profound -sleep; although it must be confessed that we always awaked sick and -dispirited, and that the use of this liquor filled us with diseases which -made our lives uncomfortable and short. - -But beside all this, the bulk of our people supported themselves by -furnishing the necessities or conveniencies of life to the rich and to -each other. For instance, when I am at home, and dressed as I ought -to be, I carry on my body the workmanship of a hundred tradesmen; the -building and furniture of my house employ as many more, and five times -the number to adorn my wife. - -I was going on to tell him of another sort of people, who get their -livelihood by attending the sick, having upon some occasions informed -his honor that many of my crew had died of diseases. But it was with -the utmost difficulty that I brought him to apprehend what I meant. He -could easily conceive that a Houyhnhnm grew weak and heavy a few days -before his death, or by some accident might hurt a limb; but that Nature, -who works all things to perfection, should suffer any pains to breed in -our bodies he thought it impossible, and desired to know the reason of -so unaccountable an evil. I told him that we fed on a thousand things -which operated contrary to each other; that we ate when we were not -hungry, and drank without the provocation of thirst; that we sat whole -nights drinking strong liquors, without eating a bit, which disposed us -to sloth, inflamed our bodies, and precipitated or prevented digestion. -That it would be endless to give him a catalogue of all diseases incident -to human bodies, for they would not be fewer than five or six hundred, -spread over every limb and joint—in short, every part, external and -intestine, having diseases appropriated to them. To remedy which, there -was a sort of people bred up among us in the profession, or pretense, of -curing the sick. And because I had some skill in the faculty, I would, -in gratitude to his honor, let him know the whole mystery and method by -which they proceed. - -Their fundamental is, that all diseases arise from repletion; whence -they conclude, that a great evacuation of the body is necessary, either -through the natural passage, or upwards at the mouth. Their next business -is, from herbs, minerals, gums, oils, shells, salts, juices, seaweed, -barks of trees, serpents, toads, frogs, spiders, dead men’s flesh and -bones, beasts, and fishes, to form a composition for smell and taste the -most abominable, nauseous, and detestable they can possibly contrive, -which the stomach immediately rejects with loathing, and this they call -a vomit; or else, from the same storehouse, with some other poisonous -additions, they command us to take in a medicine equally annoying and -disgustful to the bowels, which relaxing the belly, drives down all -before it, and this they call a purge, or a clyster. - -But besides real diseases, we are subject to many that are only -imaginary, for which the physicians have invented imaginary cures; these -have their several names, and so have the drugs that are proper for -them, and with these our female _yahoos_ are always infested. - -One great excellency in this tribe is their skill at prognostics, wherein -they seldom fail; their predictions in real diseases, when they rise to -any degree of malignity, generally portending death, which is always in -their power, when recovery is not. And therefore, upon any unexpected -signs of amendment, after they have pronounced their sentence, rather -than be accused as false prophets, they know how to approve their -sagacity to the world by a seasonable dose. - -They are likewise of special use to husbands and wives who are grown -weary of their mates, to eldest sons, to great ministers of state, and -often to princes. - -I had formerly, upon occasion, discoursed with my master upon the nature -of government in general, particularly of our own excellent constitution, -deservedly the wonder and envy of the whole world. But having here -accidentally mentioned a minister of state, he commanded me some time -after to inform him what species of _yahoo_ I particularly meant by that -appellation. - -I told him that our first or chief minister of state was a person wholly -exempt from joy and grief, love and hatred, pity and anger; at least -makes use of no other passions but a violent desire of wealth, power, and -titles. That he applies his words to all uses except to the indication of -his mind; that he never tells a truth but with an intent that you should -take it for a lie; nor a lie but with a design that you should take it -for a truth. That those he speaks worst of behind their backs are in the -surest way of preferment; and whenever he begins to praise you to others -or to yourself, you are from that day forlorn. The worst mark you can -receive is a promise, especially when it is confirmed with an oath; after -which every wise man retires, and gives over all hopes. - -There are three methods by which a man may rise to be chief minister. -The first is, by knowing how, with prudence, to dispose of a wife, a -daughter, or a sister; the second, by betraying or undermining his -predecessor; and the third is by a furious zeal in public assemblies -against the corruptions of the court. But a wise prince would rather -choose to employ those who practice the last of these methods; because -such zealots prove always the most obsequious and subservient to the -will and passions of their master. That these ministers, having all -employments at their disposal, preserve themselves in power by bribing -the majority of a senate or great council; and at last, by an act -of indemnity (whereof I described the nature to him), they secured -themselves from after reckonings, and retired from the public laden with -the spoils of the nation. - -The palace of a chief minister is a seminary to breed up others in his -own trade; the pages, lackeys, and porter, by imitating their master, -become ministers of state in their several districts, and learn to excel -in the three principal ingredients, of insolence, lying, and bribery. -Accordingly, they have a subaltern court paid to them by persons of the -best rank, and sometimes by the force of dexterity and impudence, arrive, -through several gradations, to be successors to their lord. - -He is usually governed by a decayed wench or favorite footman, who are -the tunnels through which all graces are conveyed, and may properly be -called, in the last resort, the governors of the kingdom. - -One day in discourse, my master, having heard me mention the nobility of -my country, was pleased to make me a compliment which I could not pretend -to deserve: that he was sure I must have been born of some noble family, -because I far exceeded in shape, color, and cleanliness, all the _yahoos_ -of his nation, although I seemed to fail in strength and agility, which -must be imputed to my different way of living from those other brutes; -and besides, I was not only endowed with the faculty of speech, but -likewise with some rudiments of reason, to a degree that with all his -acquaintance I passed for a prodigy. - -He made me observe, that among the Houyhnhnms, the white, the sorrel, and -the iron-gray were not so exactly shaped as the bay, the dapple-gray, -and the black; nor born with equal talents of the mind, or a capacity -to improve them; and therefore continued always in the condition of -servants, without ever aspiring to match out of their own race, which in -that country would be reckoned monstrous and unnatural. - -I made his honor my most humble acknowledgments for the good opinion he -was pleased to conceive of me; but assured him at the same time, that my -birth was of the lower sort, having been born of plain honest parents, -who were just able to give me a tolerable education. That nobility, among -us, was altogether a different thing from the idea he had of it; that -our young noblemen are bred from their childhood in idleness and luxury; -and when their fortunes are almost ruined, they marry some woman of mean -birth, disagreeable person, and unsound constitution (merely for the -sake of money), whom they hate and despise. That the productions of such -marriages are generally scrofulous, rickety, or deformed children; by -which means the family seldom continues above three generations. That a -weak diseased body, a meager countenance, and sallow complexion, are no -uncommon marks of a great man; and a healthy robust appearance is so far -disgraceful in a man of quality, that the world is apt to conclude his -real father to have been one of the inferiors of the family, especially -when it is seen that the imperfections of his mind run parallel with -those of his body, and are little else than a composition of spleen, -dullness, ignorance, caprice, sensuality and pride. - - - - -CHAPTER VII - - THE AUTHOR’S GREAT LOVE OF HIS NATIVE COUNTRY—HIS MASTER’S - OBSERVATIONS UPON THE CONSTITUTION AND ADMINISTRATION OF - ENGLAND, AS DESCRIBED BY THE AUTHOR, WITH PARALLEL CASES AND - COMPARISONS—HIS MASTER’S OBSERVATIONS UPON HUMAN NATURE. - - -The reader may be disposed to wonder how I could prevail on myself to -give so free a representation of my own species, among a race of mortals -who were already too apt to conceive the vilest opinion of human kind, -from that entire congruity betwixt me and their _yahoos_. But I must -freely confess, that the many virtues of these excellent quadrupeds -placed in opposite view to human corruptions, had so far opened my eyes -and enlarged my understanding, that I began to view the actions and -passions of man in a very different light, and to think the honor of my -own kind not worth managing; which, besides, it was impossible for me -to do before a person of so acute a judgment as my master, who daily -convinced me of a thousand faults in myself, whereof I had not the least -perception before, and which among us would never be numbered even among -human infirmities. I had likewise learned from his example an utter -detestation of all falsehood or disguise; and truth appeared so amiable -to me, that I determined upon sacrificing everything to it. - -Let me deal so candidly with the reader as to confess that there was yet -a much stronger motive for the freedom I took in my representation of -things. I had not been a year in this country before I contracted such -a love and veneration for the inhabitants, that I entered on a firm -resolution never to return to human kind, but to pass the rest of my life -among these admirable Houyhnhnms, in the contemplation and practice of -every virtue; where I could have no example or incitement to vice. But -it was decreed by fortune, my perpetual enemy, that so great a felicity -should not fall to my share. However, it is now some comfort to reflect, -that in what I said of my countrymen, I extenuated their faults as much -as I durst before so strict an examiner, and upon every article gave as -favorable a turn as the matter would bear. For, indeed, who is there -alive that will not be swayed by his bias and partiality to the place of -his birth? - -I have related the substance of several conversations I had with my -master, during the greatest part of the time I had the honor to be in his -service; but have, indeed, for brevity’s sake, omitted much more than is -here set down. - -When I had answered all his questions, and his curiosity seemed to be -fully satisfied, he sent for me one morning early, and commanding me to -sit down at some distance (an honor which he had never before conferred -upon me), he said he had been very seriously considering my whole story, -as far as it related both to myself and to my country. That he looked -upon us as a sort of animals to whose share, by what accident he could -not conjecture, some small pittance of reason had fallen, whereof we made -no other use than by its assistance to aggravate our natural corruptions, -and to acquire new ones which Nature had not given us. That we disarmed -ourselves of the few abilities she had bestowed; had been very successful -in multiplying our original wants, and seemed to spend our whole lives in -vain endeavors to supply them by our own inventions. That as to myself, -it was manifest I had neither the strength nor agility of a common yahoo, -that I walked infirmly on my hinder feet; had found out a contrivance to -make my claws of no use, or defense, and to remove the hair from my chin, -which was intended as a shelter from the sun and the weather. Lastly, -that I could neither run with speed, nor climb trees like my brethren, as -he called them, the _yahoos_ in this country. - -That our institutions of government and law were plainly owing to our -gross defects in reason, and by consequence, in virtue; because reason -alone is sufficient to govern a rational creature; which was therefore a -character we had no pretense to challenge, even from the account I had -given of my own people; although he manifestly perceived, that in order -to favor them, I had concealed many particulars, and often said the thing -which was not. - -He was the more confirmed in this opinion, because he observed, that as I -agreed in every feature of my body with other _yahoos_, except where it -was to my real disadvantage in point of strength, speed, and activity, -the shortness of my claws, and some particulars where nature had no part; -so from the representation I had given him of our lives, our manners, -and our actions, he found as near a resemblance in the disposition of -our minds. He said the _yahoos_ were known to hate one another more -than they did any different species of animals; and the reason usually -assigned, was the odiousness of their own shapes, which all could see in -the rest, but not in themselves. He had therefore begun to think it not -unwise in us to cover our bodies, and by that invention conceal many of -our deformities from each other, which would else be hardly supportable. -But he now found he had been mistaken, and that the dissensions of these -brutes in his country were owing to the same cause with ours, as I had -described them. “For if,” said he, “you throw among five _yahoos_ as -much food as would be sufficient for fifty, they will, instead of eating -peaceably, fall together by the ears, each single one impatient to have -all to itself; and therefore a servant was usually employed to stand -by while they were feeding abroad, and those kept at home were tied -at a distance from each other; that if a cow died of age or accident, -before a Houyhnhnm could secure it for his own _yahoos_, those in the -neighborhood would come in herds to seize it, and then would insue such -a battle as I had described, with terrible wounds made by their claws -on both sides, although they seldom were able to kill one another, for -want of such convenient instruments of death as we had invented. At other -times the like battles have been fought between the _yahoos_ of several -neighborhoods, without any visible cause; those of one district watching -all opportunities to surprise the next before they are prepared. But if -they find their project has miscarried, they return home, and for want of -enemies, engage in what I call a civil war among themselves.” - -That in some fields of his country, there are certain shining stones of -several colors, whereof the _yahoos_ are violently fond; and when part -of these stones is fixed in the earth, as it sometimes happens, they -will dig with their claws for whole days to get them out, then carry -them away and hide them by heaps in their kennels; but still looking -round with great caution, for fear their comrades should find out their -treasure. My master said he could never discover the reason of this -unnatural appetite, or how these stones could be of any use to a _yahoo_; -but now he believed it might proceed from the same principle of avarice -which I had ascribed to mankind. That he had once, by way of experiment, -privately removed a heap of these stones from the place where one of -his _yahoos_ had buried it; whereupon the sordid animal, missing his -treasure, by his loud lamenting brought the whole herd to the place, -there miserably howled, then fell to biting and tearing the rest; began -to pine away; would neither eat, nor sleep, nor work, till he ordered a -servant privately to convey the stones into the same hole, and hide them -as before; which when his _yahoo_ had found, he presently recovered his -spirits and good humor, but took good care to remove them to a better -hiding place, and has ever since been a very serviceable brute. - -My master farther assured me, which I also observed myself, that in the -fields where these shining stones abound, the fiercest and most frequent -battles are fought, occasioned by perpetual inroads of the neighboring -_yahoos_. - -He said it was common when two _yahoos_ discovered such a stone in a -field, and were contending which of them should be the proprietor, a -third would take the advantage and carry it away from them both; which -my master would needs contend to have some kind of resemblance with our -suits at law; wherein I thought it for our credit not to undeceive him; -since the decision he mentioned was much more equitable than many decrees -among us; because the plaintiff and defendant there lost nothing beside -the stone they contended for; whereas our courts of equity would never -have dismissed the cause while either of them had anything left. - -My master continuing his discourse, said there was nothing that rendered -the _yahoos_ more odious than their undistinguishing appetite to devour -everything that came in their way, whether herbs, roots, berries, the -corrupted flesh of animals, or all mingled together; and it was peculiar -in their temper, that they were fonder of what they could get by rapine -or stealth at a greater distance, than much better food provided for them -at home. - -There was also another kind of root, very juicy, but somewhat rare and -difficult to be found, which the _yahoos_ sought for with much eagerness, -and would suck it with great delight; and it produced in them the same -effects that wine has upon us. It would make them sometimes hug and -sometimes tear one another; they would howl, and grin, and chatter, and -reel, and tumble, and then fall asleep in the mud. - -I did indeed observe that the _yahoos_ were the only animals in the -country subject to any diseases; which, however, were much fewer than -horses have among us, and contracted not by any ill treatment they -meet with, but by the nastiness and greediness of that sordid brute. -Neither has their language any more than a general appellation for those -maladies, which is borrowed from the name of the beast, and called _hnea -yahoo_, or the _yahoo’s_ evil. - -As to learning, government, arts, manufactures, and the like, my master -confessed he could find little or no resemblance between the _yahoos_ of -that country and those in ours. For he only meant to observe what parity -there was in our natures. He had heard, indeed, some curious Houyhnhnms -observe, that in most herds there was a sort of ruling _yahoo_ (as among -us there is generally some leading or principal stag in a park), who was -always more deformed in body and mischievous in disposition than any of -the rest. That this leader had usually a favorite as like himself as he -could get. This favorite is hated by the whole herd, and therefore, to -protect himself, keeps always near the person of his leader. He usually -continues in office till a worse can be found; but the very moment he -is discarded, his successor, at the head of all the _yahoos_ in that -district, young and old, male and female, come in a body, and attack him. -But how far this might be applicable to our courts, and favorites, and -ministers of state, my master said I could best determine. - -I durst make no return to this malicious insinuation, which debased human -understanding below the sagacity of a common hound, who has judgment -enough to distinguish and follow the cry of the ablest dog in the pack, -without being ever mistaken. - -My master told me that a thing he wondered at in the _yahoos_, was their -strange disposition to nastiness and dirt, whereas there appears to be a -natural love of cleanliness in all other animals. As to the two former -accusations, I was glad to let them pass without any reply, because I had -not a word to offer upon them in defense of my species, which otherwise -I certainly had done from my own inclinations. But I could have easily -vindicated human kind from the imputation of singularity upon the last -article, if there had been any swine in that country (as unluckily -for me there were not), which although it may be a sweeter quadruped -than a _yahoo_, cannot, I humbly conceive, in justice, pretend to more -cleanliness; and so his honor himself must have owned, if he had seen -their filthy way of feeding, and their custom of wallowing and sleeping -in the mud. - -My master likewise mentioned another quality which his servants had -discovered in several _yahoos_, and to him was wholly unaccountable. -He said a fancy would sometimes take a _yahoo_ to retire to a corner, -to lie down and howl and groan, and spurn away all that came near him, -although he were young and fat, wanted neither food nor water; nor did -the servants imagine what could possibly ail him. And the only remedy -they found was to set him to hard work, after which he would infallibly -come to himself. To this I was silent out of partiality to my own kind; -yet here I could plainly discover the true seeds of spleen, which only -seizes on the lazy, the luxurious, and the rich; who, if they were forced -to undergo the same regimen, I would undertake for the cure. - - - - -CHAPTER VIII - - THE AUTHOR RELATES SEVERAL PARTICULARS OF THE YAHOOS—THE GREAT - VIRTUES OF THE HOUYHNHNMS—THE EDUCATION AND EXERCISE OF THEIR - YOUTH—THEIR GENERAL ASSEMBLY. - - -As I ought to have understood human nature much better than I supposed -it possible for my master to do, it was easy to apply the character -he gave of the _yahoos_ to myself and my countrymen; and I believed I -could yet make farther discoveries from my own observation. I therefore -often begged his favor to let me go among the herds of _yahoos_ in -the neighborhood; to which he always very graciously consented, being -perfectly convinced that the hatred I bore those brutes would never -suffer me to be corrupted by them; and his honor ordered one of his -servants, a strong sorrel nag, very honest and good-natured, to be my -guard, without whose protection I durst not undertake such adventures. -For I have already told the reader how much I was pestered by these -odious animals, upon my first arrival; and I afterwards failed very -narrowly three or four times of falling into their clutches, when I -happened to stray at any distance without my hanger. And I have reason to -believe they had some imagination that I was of their own species, which -I often assisted myself by stripping up my sleeves, and showing my naked -arms and breast in their sight, when my protector was with me. At which -times they would approach as near as they durst, and imitate my actions -after the manner of monkeys, but ever with great signs of hatred; as a -tame jackdaw with cap and stockings is always persecuted by the wild -ones, when he happens to get among them. - -They are prodigiously nimble from their infancy. However, I once caught -a young male of three years old, and endeavored, by all marks of -tenderness, to make it quiet; but the little imp fell a-squalling, and -scratching, and biting with such violence, that I was forced to let it -go; and it was high time, for a whole troop of old ones came about us -at the noise, but finding the cub was safe (for away it ran), and my -sorrel nag being by, they durst not venture near us. I observed the young -animal’s flesh to smell very rank, and the stink was somewhat between a -weasel and a fox, but much more disagreeable. - -By what I could discover, the _yahoos_ appear to be the most unteachable -of all animals; their capacities never reaching higher than to draw or -carry burdens. Yet I am of opinion, this defect arises chiefly from -a perverse, restive disposition. For they are cunning, malicious, -treacherous, and revengeful. They are strong and hardy, but of a cowardly -spirit, and by consequence insolent, abject, and cruel. It is observed, -that the red-haired of both sexes are more mischievous than the rest, -whom they yet much exceed in strength and activity. - -The Houyhnhnms keep the _yahoos_ for present use in huts not far from -the house; but the rest are sent abroad to certain fields, where they -dig up roots, eat several kinds of herbs, and search about for carrion, -or sometimes catch weasels and _luhimuhs_ (a sort of wild rat), which -they greedily devour. Nature has taught them to dig deep holes with their -nails on the side of a rising ground, wherein they lie by themselves; -only the kennels of the females are larger, sufficient to hold two or -three cubs. - -They swim from their infancy like frogs, and are able to continue long -under water, where they often take fish, which the females carry home to -their young. - -Having lived three years in this country, the reader, I suppose, will -expect that I should, like other travelers, give some account of the -manners and customs of its inhabitants, which it was, indeed, my -principal study to learn. - -As these noble Houyhnhnms are endowed by nature with a general -disposition to all virtues, and have no conceptions or ideas of what is -evil in a rational creature; so their grand maxim is to cultivate reason, -and to be wholly governed by it. Neither is reason among them a point -problematical, as with us, where men can argue with plausibility on both -sides of the question; but strikes you with immediate conviction, as -it must needs do where it is not mingled, obscured, or discolored, by -passion and interest. I remember it was with extreme difficulty that I -could bring my master to understand the meaning of the word opinion, or -how a point could be disputable; because reason taught us to affirm or -deny only where we are certain; and beyond our knowledge we cannot do -either. So that controversies, wranglings, disputes, and positiveness in -false or dubious propositions are evils unknown among the Houyhnhnms. In -the like manner, when I used to explain to him our several systems of -natural philosophy, he would laugh that a creature pretending to reason, -should value itself upon the knowledge of other people’s conjectures, -and in things where that knowledge, if it were certain, could be of no -use. Wherein he agreed entirely with the sentiments of Socrates, as Plato -delivers them; which I mention as the highest honor I can do that prince -of philosophers. I have often since reflected, what destruction such a -doctrine would make in the libraries of Europe; and how many paths of -fame would be then shut up in the learned world. - -Friendship and benevolence are the two principal virtues among the -Houyhnhnms; and these not confined to particular objects, but universal -to the whole race. For a stranger from the remotest part is equally -treated with the nearest neighbor, and wherever he goes, looks upon -himself as at home. They preserve decency and civility in the highest -degrees, but are altogether ignorant of ceremony. They have no fondness -for their colts or foals, but the care they take in educating them -proceeds entirely from the dictates of reason. And I observed my master -to show the same affection to his neighbor’s issue that he had for -his own. They will have it that nature teaches them to love the whole -species, and it is reason only that makes a distinction of persons, where -there is a superior degree of virtue. - -When the matron Houyhnhnms have produced one of each sex, they no longer -accompany with their consorts, except they lose one of their issue by -some casualty, which very seldom happens; but in such a case they meet -again; or when the like accident befalls a person whose wife is past -bearing, some other couple bestow on him one of their own colts, and then -go together again until the mother is pregnant. This caution is necessary -to prevent the country from being overburdened with numbers. But the race -of inferior Houyhnhnms bred up to be servants, is not so strictly limited -upon this article; these are allowed to produce three of each sex, to be -domestics in the noble families. - -In their marriages, they are exactly careful to choose such colors -as will not make any disagreeable mixture in the breed. Strength is -chiefly valued in the male, and comeliness in the female, not upon the -account of love, but to preserve the race from degenerating; for where -a female happens to excel in strength, a consort is chosen with regard -to comeliness. Courtship, love, presents, jointures, settlements, have -no place in their thoughts; or terms whereby to express them in their -language. The young couple meet, and are joined, merely because it is -the determination of their parents and friends; it is what they see done -every day, and they look upon it as one of the necessary actions of a -reasonable being. But the violation of marriage, or any other unchastity, -was never heard of, and the married pair pass their lives with the -same friendship and mutual benevolence that they bear to all others of -the same species who come in their way; without jealousy, fondness, -quarreling, or discontent. - -In educating the youth of both sexes, their method is admirable, and -highly deserves our imitation. These are not suffered to taste a grain -of oats, except upon certain days, till eighteen years old; nor milk, -but very rarely; and in summer they graze two hours in the morning, and -as long in the evening, which their parents likewise observe; but the -servants are not allowed above half that time, and a great part of their -grass is brought home, which they eat at the most convenient hours, when -they can be best spared from work. - -Temperance, industry, exercise, and cleanliness, are the lessons equally -enjoined to the young ones of both sexes; and my master thought it -monstrous in us to give the females a different kind of education from -the males, except in some articles of domestic management; whereby, as -he truly observed, one half of our natives were good for nothing but -bringing children into the world. And to trust the care of our children -to such useless animals, he said, was yet a greater instance of brutality. - -But the Houyhnhnms train up their youth to strength, speed, and -hardiness, by exercising them in running races up and down steep hills, -and over hard stony grounds; and when they are all in a sweat they are -ordered to leap over head and ears into a pond or river. Four times a -year the youth of a certain district meet to show their proficiency in -running and leaping, and other feats of strength and agility, where the -victor is rewarded with a song in his or her praise. On this festival the -servants drive a herd of _yahoos_ into the field, laden with hay, and -oats, and milk, for a repast to the Houyhnhnms; after which these brutes -are immediately driven back again, for fear of being noisome to the -assembly. - -Every fourth year, at the vernal equinox, there is a representative -council of the whole nation, which meets in a plain about twenty miles -from our house, and continues about five or six days. Here they inquire -into the state and condition of the several districts; whether they -abound or be deficient in hay, or oats, or cows, or _yahoos_; and -wherever there is any want (which is but seldom) it is immediately -supplied by unanimous consent and contribution. Here likewise the -regulation of children is settled; as for instance, if a Houyhnhnm has -two males, he changes one of them with another that has two females; and -when a child has been lost by any casualty, where the mother is past -breeding, it is determined what family shall breed another to supply the -loss. - - - - -CHAPTER IX - - A GRAND DEBATE AT THE GENERAL ASSEMBLY OF THE HOUYHNHNMS, AND - HOW IT WAS DETERMINED—THE LEARNING OF THE HOUYHNHNMS—THEIR - BUILDINGS—THEIR MANNER OF BURIALS—THE DEFECTIVENESS OF THEIR - LANGUAGE. - - -One of these grand assemblies was held in my time, about three months -before my departure, whither my master went as the representative of our -district. In this council was resumed their old debate, and indeed the -only debate that ever happened in that country; whereof my master, after -his return, gave me a very particular account. - -The question to be debated was, whether the _yahoos_ should be -exterminated from the face of the earth. One of the members for the -affirmative offered several arguments of great strength and weight, -alleging that as the _yahoos_ were the most filthy, noisome, and deformed -animal which nature ever produced, so they were the most restive and -indocile, mischievous and malicious; they would privately suck the teats -of the Houyhnhnms’ cows, kill and devour their cats, trample down their -oats and grass, if they were not continually watched, and commit a -thousand other extravagancies. He took notice of a general tradition that -_yahoos_ had not been always in that country; but that, many ages ago, -two of these brutes appeared together upon a mountain, whether produced -by the heat of the sun upon corrupted mud and slime, or from the ooze and -froth of the sea, was never known. That these _yahoos_ engendered, and -their brood, in a short time, grew so numerous as to overrun and infest -the whole nation. That the Houyhnhnms, to get rid of this evil, made -a general hunting, and at last inclosed the whole herd; and destroying -the elder, every Houyhnhnm kept two young ones in a kennel, and brought -them to such a degree of tameness, as an animal so savage by nature can -be capable of acquiring; using them for draught and carriage. That there -seemed to be much truth in this tradition, and that those creatures could -not be _ylnhniamshy_ (or aborigines of the land), because of the violent -hatred the Houyhnhnms, as well as all other animals, bore them, which, -although their evil disposition sufficiently deserved, could never have -arrived at so high a degree, if they had been aborigines; or else they -would have long since been rooted out. That the inhabitants, taking a -fancy to use the service of the _yahoos_, had very imprudently neglected -to cultivate the breed of asses, which are a comely animal, easily kept, -more tame and orderly, without any offensive smell; strong enough for -labor, although they yield to the other in agility of body; and if their -braying be no agreeable sound, it is far preferable to the horrible -howlings of the _yahoos_. - -Several others declared their sentiments to the same purpose, when my -master proposed an expedient to the assembly, whereof he had indeed -borrowed the hint from me. He approved of the tradition mentioned by the -honorable member who spoke before, and affirmed, that the two _yahoos_ -said to be first seen among them had been driven thither over the sea; -that coming to land, and being forsaken by their companions, they retired -to the mountains, and degenerating by degrees, became in process of time -much more savage than those of their own species in the country whence -these two originals came. The reason of his assertion was, that he had -now in his possession a certain wonderful _yahoo_ (meaning myself), -which most of them had heard of, and many of them had seen. He then -related to them how he first found me; that my body was all covered with -an artificial composure of the skins and hairs of other animals; that -I had a language of my own, and had thoroughly learned theirs; that I -had related to him the accidents which brought me thither; that when he -saw me without my covering, I was an exact _yahoo_ in every part, only -of a whiter color, less hairy, and with shorter claws. He added how I -had endeavored to persuade him, that in my own and other countries the -_yahoos_ acted as the governing, rational animal, and held the Houyhnhnms -in servitude; that he observed in me all the qualities of a _yahoo_, only -a little more civilized by some tincture of reason, which, however, was -in a degree as far inferior to the Houyhnhnm race, as the _yahoos_ of -their country were to me. That among other things I mentioned a custom we -had of preventing Houyhnhnms from propagating their kind; that it was no -shame to learn wisdom from brutes, as industry is taught by the ant, and -building by the swallow (for so I translate the word _lyhannh_, although -it be a much larger fowl); that this invention might be practiced upon -the younger _yahoos_ here, which would in an age put an end to the whole -species, without destroying life. That in the meantime the Houyhnhnms -should be exhorted to cultivate the breed of asses, which as they are in -all respects more valuable brutes, so they have this advantage, to be fit -for service at five years old, which the others are not till twelve. - -This was all my master thought fit to tell me at that time, of -what passed in the grand council. But he was pleased to conceal one -particular, which related personally to myself, whereof I soon felt the -unhappy effect, as the reader will know in its proper place, and whence I -date all the succeeding misfortunes of my life. - -The Houyhnhnms have no letters, and consequently their knowledge is all -traditional. But there happening few events of any moment among a people -so well united, naturally disposed of every virtue, wholly governed by -reason, and cut off from all commerce with other nations, the historical -part is easily preserved without burdening their memories. I have already -observed that they are subject to no diseases, and therefore can have no -need of physicians. However, they have excellent medicines, composed of -herbs, to cure accidental bruises and cuts in the pastern or frog of the -foot, by sharp stones, as well as other maims and hurts in the several -parts of the body. - -They calculate the year by the revolution of the sun and the moon, but -use no subdivisions into weeks. They are well enough acquainted with the -motions of those two luminaries, and understand the nature of eclipses; -and this is the utmost progress of their astronomy. - -In poetry, they must be allowed to excel all other mortals; wherein the -justness of their similes, and the minuteness as well as exactness of -their descriptions, are indeed inimitable. Their verses abound very much -in both of these, and usually contain either some exalted notions of -friendship and benevolence, or the praises of those who were victors in -races and other bodily exercises. Their buildings, although very rude -and simple, are not inconvenient but well contrived to defend them from -all injuries of cold and heat. They have a kind of tree, which at forty -years old loosens in the root, and falls with the first storm; they -grow very straight, and being pointed like stakes with a sharp stone -(for the Houyhnhnms know not the use of iron), they stick them erect in -the ground, about ten inches asunder, and then weave in oat-straw, or -sometimes wattles between them. The roof is made after the same manner, -and so are the doors. - -The Houyhnhnms use the hollow part between the pastern and the hoof of -the forefoot, as we do our hands, and this with greater dexterity than -I could at first imagine. I have seen a white mare of our family thread -a needle (which I lent her on purpose) with that joint. They milk their -cows, reap their oats, and do all the work which requires hands, in the -same manner. They have a kind of hard flints, which by grinding against -other stones, they form into instruments, that serve instead of wedges, -axes, and hammers. With tools made of these flints, they likewise cut -their hay, and reap their oats, which there grow naturally in several -fields; the _yahoos_ draw home the sheaves in carriages, and the servants -tread them in certain covered huts to get out the grain, which is kept in -stores. They make a rude kind of earthen and wooden vessels, and bake the -former in the sun. - -If they can avoid casualties, they die only of old age, and are buried -in the obscurest places that can be found, their friends and relations -expressing neither joy nor grief at their departure; nor does the dying -person discover the least regret that he is leaving the world, any more -than if he were upon returning home from a visit to one of his neighbors. -I remember my master having once made an appointment with a friend and -his family to come to his house, upon some affair of importance: on the -day fixed, the mistress and her two children came very late; she made -two excuses, first for her husband, who, as she said, happened that very -morning to _shnuwnh_. The word is strongly expressive in their language, -but not easily rendered into English; it signifies, “to retire to his -first mother.” Her excuse for not coming sooner, was, that her husband -dying late in the morning, she was a good while consulting her servants -about a convenient place where his body should be laid; and I observed -she behaved herself at our house as cheerfully as the rest; she died -about three months after. - -They live generally to seventy or seventy-five years, very seldom to -fourscore; some weeks before their death, they feel a gradual decay, but -without pain. During this time they are much visited by their friends, -because they cannot go abroad with their usual ease and satisfaction. -However, about ten days before their death, which they seldom fail in -computing, they return the visits that have been made them by those who -are nearest in the neighborhood, being carried in a convenient sledge -drawn by _yahoos_, which vehicle they use, not only upon this occasion, -but when they grow old, upon long journeys, or when they are lamed by an -accident; and therefore, when the dying Houyhnhnms return those visits, -they take a solemn leave of their friends, as if they were going to some -remote part of the country where they designed to pass the rest of their -lives. - -I know not whether it may be worth observing that the Houyhnhnms have no -word in their language to express anything that is evil, except what they -borrow from the deformities or ill qualities of the _yahoos_. Thus, they -denote the folly of a servant, an omission of a child, a stone that cuts -their feet, a continuance of foul or unseasonable weather, and the like, -by adding to each the epithet of _yahoo_. For instance, _hhnm yahoo_, -_whnaholm yahoo_, _ynlhmndwihlma yahoo_, and an ill-contrived house, -_ynholmhnmrohlnw yahoo_. - -I could, with great pleasure, enlarge farther upon the manners and -virtues of this excellent people; but intending in a short time to -publish a volume by itself, expressly upon that subject, I refer the -reader thither; and, in the meantime, proceed to relate my own sad -catastrophe. - - - - -CHAPTER X - - THE AUTHOR’S ECONOMY AND HAPPY LIFE AMONG THE HOUYHNHNMS—HIS - GREAT IMPROVEMENT IN VIRTUE BY CONVERSING WITH THEM—THEIR - CONVERSATIONS—THE AUTHOR HAS NOTICE GIVEN HIM BY HIS MASTER - THAT HE MUST DEPART FROM THE COUNTRY—HE FALLS INTO A SWOON FOR - GRIEF, BUT SUBMITS—HE CONTRIVES AND FINISHES A CANOE BY THE - HELP OF A FELLOW SERVANT, AND PUTS TO SEA AT A VENTURE. - - -I had settled my little economy to my own heart’s content. My master had -ordered a room to be made for me, after their manner, about six yards -from the house, the sides and floors of which I plastered with clay, and -covered with rush mats of my own contriving; I had beaten hemp, which -there grows wild, and made of it a sort of ticking; this I filled with -the feathers of several birds I had taken with springs made of _yahoos_’ -hairs, and were excellent food. I had worked two chairs with my knife, -the sorrel nag helping me in the grosser and more laborious part. When -my clothes were worn to rags, I made myself others with the skins of -rabbits, and of a certain beautiful animal, about the same size, called -_nnuhnoh_, the skin of which is covered with a fine down. Of these I -also made very tolerable stockings. I soled my shoes with wood, which I -cut from a tree, and fitted to the upper leather; and when this was worn -out, I supplied it with the skins of _yahoos_ dried in the sun. I often -got honey out of hollow trees, which I mingled with water, or ate with -my bread. No man could more verify the truth of these two maxims, that -nature is very easily satisfied; and that necessity is the mother of -invention. I enjoyed perfect health of body, and tranquillity of mind; I -did not find the treachery or inconstancy of a friend, nor the injuries -of a secret or open enemy. I had no occasion of bribing or flattering to -procure the favor of any great man, or of his minion. I wanted no fence -against fraud, or oppression; here was neither physician to destroy my -body, nor lawyer to ruin my fortune; no informer to watch my words and -actions, or forge accusations against me for hire; here were no gibers, -censurers, backbiters, pickpockets, highwaymen, housebreakers, attorneys, -buffoons, gamesters, politicians, wits, splenetics, tedious talkers, -controvertists, ravishers, murderers, robbers, virtuosos; no leaders, or -followers, of party and faction; no encouragers to vice, by seducement -or example; no dungeon, axes, gibbets, whipping posts, or pillories; no -cheating shopkeepers, or mechanics; no pride, vanity, or affectation; no -fops, bullies, drunkards; no ranting, expensive wives; no stupid, proud -pedants; no importunate, overbearing, quarrelsome, noisy, roaring, empty, -conceited, swearing companions; no scoundrels raised from the dust for -the sake of their vices, or nobility thrown into it on account of their -virtues; no lords, fiddlers, judges, or dancing masters. - -I had the favor of being admitted to several Houyhnhnms who came to -visit or dine with my master; where his honor graciously suffered me to -wait in the room, and listen to their discourse. Both he and his company -would often descend to ask me questions, and receive my answers. I had -also sometimes the honor of attending my master in his visits to others. -I never presumed to speak, except in answer to a question; and then I -did it with inward regret, because it was a loss of so much time for -improving myself: but I was infinitely delighted with the station of -a humble auditor in such conversations, where nothing passed but what -was useful, expressed in the fewest and most significant words; where -the greatest decency was observed without the least degree of ceremony; -where no person spoke without being pleased himself, and pleasing his -companions; where there was no interruption, tediousness, heat, or -difference of sentiments. They have a notion, that when people are met -together, a short silence does much improve conversation; this I found -to be true; for during those little intermissions of talk, new ideas -would arise in their minds, which very much enlivened the discourse. -Their subjects are generally on friendship and benevolence; on order and -economy; sometimes upon the visible operations of nature, or ancient -traditions; upon the bounds and limits of virtue; upon the unerring rules -of reason, or upon some determinations to be taken at the next assembly; -and often upon the various excellencies of poetry. I may add, without -vanity, that my presence often gave them sufficient matter for discourse, -because it afforded my master an occasion of letting his friends into -the history of me and my country, upon which they were all pleased to -descant, in a manner not very advantageous to human kind; and for that -reason I shall not repeat what they said; only I may be allowed to -observe, that his honor, to my great admiration, appeared to understand -the nature of _yahoos_ much better than myself. He went through all our -vices and follies, and discovered many which I had never mentioned to -him, by only supposing what qualities a _yahoo_ of their country, with a -small proportion of reason, might be capable of exerting; and concluded, -with too much probability, how vile, as well as miserable such a creature -must be. - -I freely confess, that all the little knowledge I have of any value, was -acquired by the lectures I received from my master, and from hearing -the discourses of him and his friends; to which I should be prouder to -listen, than to dictate to the greatest and wisest assembly in Europe. I -admired the strength, comeliness, and speed of the inhabitants; and such -a constellation of virtues, in such amiable persons, produced in me the -highest veneration. At first, indeed, I did not feel that natural awe -which the _yahoos_ and all other animals bear towards them; but it grew -upon me by degrees, much sooner than I imagined, and was mingled with a -respectful love and gratitude, that they would condescend to distinguish -me from the rest of my species. - -When I thought of my family, my friends, my countrymen, or the human -race in general, I considered them, as they really were, _yahoos_ in -shape and disposition, only a little civilized, and qualified with the -gift of speech; but making no other use of reason than to improve and -multiply those vices, whereof their brethren in this country had only -the share that nature allotted them. When I happened to behold the -reflection of my own form in a lake or a fountain, I turned away my -face in horror and detestation of myself; and could better endure the -sight of a common _yahoo_, than of my own person. By conversing with the -Houyhnhnms and looking upon them with delight, I fell to imitate their -gait and gestures, which is now grown into a habit; and my friends often -tell me, in a blunt way, that I trot like a horse, which, however, I take -for a great compliment; neither shall I disown, that in speaking I am -apt to fall into the voice and manner of the Houyhnhnms, and hear myself -ridiculed on that account without the least mortification. - -In the midst of all this happiness, and when I looked upon myself to -be fully settled for life, my master sent for me one morning a little -earlier than his usual hour. I observed by his countenance that he was in -some perplexity, and at a loss how to begin what he had to speak. After -a short silence he told me he did not know how I would take what he was -going to say; that in the last general assembly, when the affair of the -_yahoos_ was entered upon, the representatives had taken offense at his -keeping a _yahoo_ (meaning myself) in his family more like a Houyhnhnm -than a brute animal. That he was known frequently to converse with me, as -if he could receive some advantage or pleasure in my company. That such a -practice was not agreeable to reason or nature, nor a thing ever heard of -before among them. The assembly did therefore exhort him either to employ -me like the rest of my species, or command me to swim back to the place -whence I came. That the first of these expedients was utterly rejected by -all the Houyhnhnms who had ever seen me at his house or their own; for -they alleged, that because I had some rudiments of reason, added to the -natural depravity of those animals, it was to be feared I might be able -to seduce them into the woody and mountainous parts of the country, and -bring them in troops by night to destroy the Houyhnhnms’ cattle, as being -naturally of the ravenous kind, and averse from labor. - -My master added that he was daily pressed by the Houyhnhnms of the -neighborhood, to have the assembly’s exhortation executed, which he -could not put off much longer. He doubted it would be impossible for me -to swim to another country; and therefore wished I would contrive some -sort of a vehicle, resembling those I had described to him, that might -carry me on the sea; in which work I should have the assistance of his -own servants, as well as those of his neighbors. He concluded, that for -his own part, he could have been content to keep me in his service as -long as I lived; because he found I had cured myself of some bad habits -and dispositions, by endeavoring, as far as my inferior nature was -capable, to imitate the Houyhnhnms. - -I should here observe to the reader, that a decree of the general -assembly in this country is expressed by the word _hnhloayn_, which -signifies an exhortation, as near as I can render it: for they have no -conception how a rational creature can be compelled, but only advised, -or exhorted; because no person can disobey reason, without giving up his -claim to be a rational creature. - -I was struck with the utmost grief and despair at my master’s discourse; -and being unable to support the agonies I was under, I fell into a -swoon at his feet. When I came to myself he told me that he concluded I -had been dead; for these people are subject to no such imbecilities of -nature. I answered in a faint voice that death would have been too great -a happiness; that although I could not blame the assembly’s exhortation, -or the urgency of his friends; yet, in my weak and corrupt judgment, I -thought it might consist with reason to have been less rigorous. That I -could not swim a league, and probably the nearest land to theirs might -be distant above a hundred. That many materials necessary for making -a small vessel to carry me off, were wholly wanting in this country; -which, however, I would attempt, in obedience and gratitude to his honor, -although I concluded the thing to be impossible, and therefore looked on -myself as already devoted to destruction. That the certain prospect of -an unnatural death was the least of my evils; for, supposing I should -escape with life by some strange adventure, how could I think with temper -of passing my days among _yahoos_, and relapsing into my old corruptions -for want of examples to lead and keep me within the paths of virtue? -That I knew too well upon what solid reasons all the determinations of -the wise Houyhnhnms were founded, not to be shaken by arguments of mine, -a miserable _yahoo_; and therefore, after presenting him with my humble -thanks for the offer of his servants’ assistance in making a vessel, and -desiring a reasonable time for so difficult a work, I told him I would -endeavor to preserve a wretched being; and if ever I returned to England, -was not without hopes of being useful to my own species, by celebrating -the praises of the renowned Houyhnhnms, and proposing their virtues to -the imitation of mankind. - -My master, in a few words, made a very gracious reply; allowed me the -space of two months to finish my boat; and ordered the sorrel nag, my -fellow servant (for so at this distance I may presume to call him), to -follow my instruction, because I told my master that his help would be -sufficient, and I knew he had a tenderness for me. - -In his company, my first business was to go to that part of the coast -where my rebellious crew had ordered me to be set on shore. I got upon -a height, and looking on every side into the sea, fancied I saw a small -island towards the northeast. I took out my pocket glass, and could -then clearly distinguish it about five leagues off, as I computed; but -it appeared to the sorrel nag to be only a blue cloud: for as he had no -conception of any country beside his own, so he could not be as expert in -distinguishing remote objects at sea, as we who so much converse in that -element. - -After I had discovered this island, I considered no farther; but resolved -it should, if possible, be the first place of my banishment, leaving the -consequence to fortune. - -I returned home, and consulting with the sorrel nag, we went into a copse -at some distance, where I with my knife, and he with a sharp flint, -fastened very artificially after their manner to a wooden handle, cut -down several oak wattles, about the thickness of a walking staff, and -some larger pieces. But I shall not trouble the reader with a particular -description of my own mechanics; let it suffice to say, that in six -weeks’ time, with the help of the sorrel nag, who performed the parts -that required most labor, I finished a sort of Indian canoe, but much -larger, covering it with the skins of _yahoos_, well stitched together -with hempen threads of my own making. My sail was likewise composed of -the skins of the same animal; but I made use of the youngest I could get, -the older being too tough and thick; and I likewise provided myself with -four paddles. I laid in a stock of boiled flesh of rabbits and fowls; and -took with me two vessels, one filled with milk and the other with water. - -I tried my canoe in a large pond, near my master’s house, and then -corrected in it what was amiss; stopping all the chinks with _yahoos’_ -tallow, till I found it stanch, and able to bear me and my freight; and -when it was as complete as I could possibly make it, I had it drawn on a -carriage very gently by _yahoos_ to the seaside, under the conduct of the -sorrel nag and another servant. - -When all was ready, and the day came for my departure, I took leave of -my master, and lady, and the whole family, my eyes flowing with tears, -and my heart quite sunk with grief. But his honor, out of curiosity, and -perhaps (if I may speak it without vanity) partly out of kindness, was -determined to see me in my canoe; and got several of his neighboring -friends to accompany him. I was forced to wait above an hour for the -tide, and then observing the wind very fortunately bearing towards the -island to which I intended to steer my course, I took a second leave -of my master; but as I was going to prostrate myself to kiss his hoof, -he did me the honor to raise it gently to my mouth. I am not ignorant -how much I have been censured for mentioning this last particular. For -my detractors are pleased to think it improbable that so illustrious -a person should descend to give so great a mark of distinction to -a creature so inferior as I. Neither have I forgotten how apt some -travelers are to boast of extraordinary favors they have received. But, -if these censurers were better acquainted with the noble and courteous -disposition of the Houyhnhnms, they would soon change their opinion. - -I paid my respects to the rest of the Houyhnhnms in his honor’s company; -then getting into my canoe, I pushed off from the shore. - - - - -CHAPTER XI - - THE AUTHOR’S DANGEROUS VOYAGE—HE ARRIVES AT NEW HOLLAND, - HOPING TO SETTLE THERE—IS WOUNDED WITH AN ARROW BY ONE OF - THE NATIVES—IS SEIZED AND CARRIED BY FORCE INTO A PORTUGUESE - SHIP—THE GREAT CIVILITIES OF THE CAPTAIN—THE AUTHOR ARRIVES AT - ENGLAND. - - -I began this desperate voyage on February 15, 1714/5, at nine o’clock in -the morning. The wind was very favorable; however, I made use at first -only of my paddles; but considering I should soon be weary, and that the -wind might chop about, I ventured to set up my little sail; and thus, -with the help of the tide, I went at the rate of a league and a half an -hour, as near as I could guess. My master and his friends continued on -the shore till I was almost out of sight; and I often heard the sorrel -nag (who always loved me) crying out, _Hnuy illa nyha majah yahoo_—“Take -care of thyself, gentle yahoo.” - -My design was, if possible, to discover some small island uninhabited, -yet sufficient with my labor to furnish me with the necessaries of life, -which I would have thought a greater happiness than to be first minister -in the politest court of Europe; so horrible was the idea I conceived of -returning to live in the society and under the government of _yahoos_. -For in such a solitude as I desired, I could at least enjoy my own -thoughts, and reflect with delight on the virtues of those inimitable -Houyhnhnms, without any opportunity of degenerating into the vices and -corruptions of my own species. - -The reader may remember what I related when my crew conspired against me, -and confined me to my cabin; how I continued there several weeks without -knowing what course we took, and when I was put ashore in the longboat, -how the sailors told me with oaths, whether true or false, that they -knew not in what part of the world we were. However, I did then believe -us to be about 10 degrees southward of the Cape of Good Hope, or about -45 degrees southern latitude, as I gathered from some general words -I overheard among them, being, I supposed, to the southeast in their -intended voyage to Madagascar. And although this were little better than -conjecture, yet I resolved to steer my course eastward, hoping to reach -the southwest coast of New Holland, and perhaps some such island as I -desired, lying westward of it. The wind was full west, and by six in the -evening I computed I had gone eastward at least eighteen leagues; when I -spied a very small island about half a league off, which I soon reached. -It was nothing but a rock, with one creek naturally arched by the force -of tempests. Here I put in my canoe, and climbing a part of the rock, I -could plainly discover land to the east extending from south to north. I -lay all night in my canoe, and repeating my voyage early in the morning, -I arrived in seven hours to the southwest point of New Holland. This -confirmed me in the opinion I have long entertained, that the maps and -charts place this country at least three degrees more to the east than -it really is; which thought I communicated many years ago to my worthy -friend Mr. Herman Moll, and gave him my reasons for it, although he has -rather chosen to follow other authors. - -I saw no inhabitants in the place where I landed, and being unarmed, I -was afraid of venturing far into the country. I found some shellfish -on the shore, and ate them raw, not daring to kindle a fire, for fear -of being discovered by the natives. I continued three days feeding on -oysters and limpets, to save my own provisions; and I fortunately found a -brook of excellent water, which gave me great relief. - -On the fourth day, venturing out a little too far, I saw twenty or thirty -natives upon a height not above five hundred yards from me. They were -stark naked, men, women and children round a fire, as I could discover -by the smoke. One of them spied me, and gave notice to the rest; five of -them advanced towards me, leaving the women and children at the fire. I -made what haste I could to the shore, and, getting into my canoe, shoved -off: the savages, observing me retreat, ran after me, and before I could -get far enough into the sea, discharged an arrow, which wounded me deeply -on the inside of my left knee (I shall carry the mark to my grave). I -apprehended the arrow might be poisoned, and paddling out of the reach -of their darts (being a calm day), I made a shift to suck the wound, and -dress it as well as I could. - -I was at a loss what to do, for I durst not return to the same landing -place, but stood to the north, and was forced to paddle; for the wind, -though very gentle, was against me, blowing northwest. As I was looking -about for a secure landing place, I saw a sail to the north-north-east, -which appearing every minute more visible, I was in some doubt whether I -should wait for them or not; but at last my detestation of the _yahoo_ -race prevailed; and turning my canoe, I sailed and paddled together to -the south, and got into the same creek whence I set out in the morning, -choosing rather to trust myself among these barbarians, than live with -European _yahoos_. I drew up my canoe as close as I could to the shore, -and hid myself behind a stone by the little brook, which, as I have -already said, was excellent water. - -The ship came within half a league of this creek, and sent her longboat -with vessels to take in fresh water (for the place, it seems, was very -well known), but I did not observe it till the boat was almost on shore; -and it was too late to seek another hiding place. The seamen at their -landing observed my canoe, and rummaging it all over, easily conjectured -that the owner could not be far off. Four of them, well armed, searched -every cranny and lurking hole, till at last they found me flat on my face -behind the stone. They gazed awhile in admiration at my strange uncouth -dress; my coat made of skins, my wooden shoes and my furred stockings; -whence, however, they concluded I was not a native of the place, who all -go naked. One of the seamen, in Portuguese, bid me rise, and asked me who -I was. I understood that language very well, and getting upon my feet, -said I was a poor _yahoo_, banished from the Houyhnhnms, and desired -they would please to let me depart. They admired to hear me answer them -in their own tongue, and saw by my complexion I must be a European; but -were at a loss to know what I meant by _yahoos_ and Houyhnhnms; and at -the same time fell a-laughing at my strange tone in speaking, which -resembled the neighing of a horse. I trembled all the while betwixt fear -and hatred. I again desired leave to depart, and was gently moving to -my canoe; but they laid hold of me, desiring to know what country I was -of, whence I came, with many other questions. I told them I was born -in England, whence I came about five years ago, and then their country -and ours were at peace. I therefore hoped they would not treat me as an -enemy, since I meant them no harm; but was a poor _yahoo_, seeking some -desolate place where to pass the remainder of his unfortunate life. - -When they began to talk, I thought I never heard or saw anything so -unnatural; for it appeared to me as monstrous as if a dog or a cow should -speak in England, or a _yahoo_ in Houyhnhnmland. The honest Portuguese -were equally amazed at my strange dress, and the odd manner of delivering -my words, which, however, they understood very well. They spoke to me -with great humanity, and said they were sure the captain would carry me -gratis to Lisbon, whence I might return to my own country; that two of -the seamen would go back to the ship, inform the captain of what they had -seen, and receive his orders; in the meantime, unless I would give my -solemn oath not to fly, they would secure me by force. I thought it best -to comply with their proposal. They were very curious to know my story, -but I gave them very little satisfaction, and they all conjectured that -my misfortunes had impaired my reason. In two hours the boat, which went -laden with vessels of water, returned with the captain’s command to fetch -me on board. I fell on my knees to preserve my liberty; but all was in -vain; and the men having tied me with cords, heaved me into the boat, -whence I was taken into the ship, and thence into the captain’s cabin. - -His name was Pedro de Mendez; he was a very courteous and generous -person. He entreated me to give some account of myself, and desired -to know what I would eat or drink; said I should be used as well as -himself; and spoke so many obliging things, that I wondered to find such -civilities from a _yahoo_. However, I remained silent and sullen; I was -ready to faint at the very smell of him and his men. At last I desired -something to eat out of my own canoe; but he ordered me a chicken, and -some excellent wine, and then directed that I should be put to bed in a -very clean cabin. I would not undress myself, but lay on the bedclothes, -and in half an hour stole out when I thought the crew were at dinner, and -getting to the side of the ship, was going to leap into the sea and swim -for my life, rather than continue among _yahoos_. But one of the seamen -prevented me, and having informed the captain, I was chained to my cabin. - -After dinner, Don Pedro came to me, and desired to know my reason for so -desperate an attempt; assured me he only meant to do me all the service -he was able; and spoke so very movingly, that at last I descended to -treat him like an animal which had some little portion of reason. I -gave him a very short relation of my voyage; of the conspiracy against -me by my own men; of the country where they set me on shore, and of my -five years’ residence there. All which he looked upon as if it were a -dream or a vision; whereat I took great offense; for I had quite forgot -the faculty of lying, so peculiar to _yahoos_ in all countries where -they preside, and consequently, the disposition of suspecting truth in -others of their own species. I asked him whether it were the custom in -his country to say the thing which was not. I assured him I had almost -forgot what he meant by falsehood, and if I had lived a thousand years in -Houyhnhnmland, I should never have heard a lie from the meanest servant; -that I was altogether indifferent whether he believed me or no; but -however, in return for his favors, I would give so much allowance to the -corruption of his nature, as to answer any objection he might please to -make, and then he might easily discover the truth. - -The captain, a wise man, after many endeavors to catch me tripping in -some part of my story, at last began to have a better opinion of my -veracity, and the rather because he confessed he met with a Dutch skipper -who pretended to have landed with five others of his crew on a certain -island or continent south of New Holland, where they went for fresh -water, and observed a horse driving before him several animals exactly -resembling those I described under the name of _yahoos_, with some other -particulars which the captain said he had forgotten, because he then -considered them all to be lies. But he added that since I professed so -inviolable an attachment to truth, I must give him my word and honor to -bear him company in this voyage without attempting anything against my -life, or else he would continue to hold me a prisoner till we arrived at -Lisbon. I gave him the required promise, but at the same time I protested -that I would suffer the greatest hardships rather than return to live -among _yahoos_. - -Our voyage passed without any considerable accident. In gratitude to the -captain, I sometimes sat with him at his earnest request, and strove to -conceal my antipathy against human kind, although it often broke out, -which he suffered to pass without observation. But the greatest part of -the day I confined myself to my cabin, to avoid seeing any of the crew. -The captain had often entreated me to strip myself of my savage dress, -and offered to lend me the best suit of clothes he had. This I would not -be prevailed on to accept, abhorring to cover myself with anything that -had been on the back of a _yahoo_; I only desired he would lend me two -clean shirts, which having been washed since he wore them, I believed -would not so much defile me. These I changed every second day, and washed -them myself. - -We arrived at Lisbon, November 5th, 1715. At our landing, the captain -forced me to cover myself with his cloak, to prevent the rabble from -crowding about me. I was conveyed to his own house; and at my earnest -request he led me up to the highest room backwards. I conjured him to -conceal from all persons what I had told him of the Houyhnhnms; because -the least hint of such a story would not only draw numbers of people to -see me, but probably put me in danger of being imprisoned, or burnt by -the Inquisition. The captain persuaded me to accept a suit of clothes -newly made, but I would not suffer the tailor to take my measure; -however, Don Pedro being almost of my size, they fitted me well enough. -He accoutered me with other necessaries, all new, which I aired for -twenty-four hours before I would use them. - -The captain had no wife, nor above three servants, none of which were -suffered to attend at meals; and his whole deportment was so obliging, -added to very good human understanding, that I really began to tolerate -his company. He gained so far upon me, that I ventured to look out of the -back window. By degrees I was brought into another room, whence I peeped -into the street, but drew my head back in a fright. In a week’s time he -seduced me down to the door. I found my terror gradually lessened, but my -hatred and contempt seemed to increase. I was at last bold enough to walk -the street in his company, but kept my nose well stopped with rue, and -sometimes with tobacco. - -In ten days, Don Pedro, to whom I had given some account of my domestic -affairs, put it upon me, as a matter of honor and conscience, that I -ought to return to my native country, and live at home with my wife and -children. He told me there was an English ship in port just ready to -sail, and he would furnish me with all things necessary. It would be -tedious to repeat his arguments, and my contradictions. He said it was -altogether impossible to find such a solitary island as I had desired -to live in; but I might command in my own house, and pass my time in a -manner as recluse as I pleased. - -I complied at last, finding I could do no better. I left Lisbon the 24th -day of November, in an English merchantman, but who was the master I -never inquired. Don Pedro accompanied me to the ship, and lent me twenty -pounds. He took kind leave of me, and embraced me at parting, which I -bore as well as I could. During the last voyage I had no commerce with -the master or any of his men; but pretending I was sick, kept close in my -cabin. On the 5th of December, 1715, we cast anchor at the Downs, about -nine in the morning, and at three in the afternoon I got safe to my house -at Redriff. - -My wife and family received me with great surprise and joy, because they -concluded me certainly dead; but I must freely confess the sight of them -filled me only with hatred, disgust, and contempt, and the more, by -reflecting on the near alliance I had to them. For although, since my -unfortunate exile from the Houyhnhnm country, I had compelled myself to -tolerate the sight of _yahoos_, and to converse with Don Pedro de Mendez, -yet my memory and imagination were perpetually filled with the virtues -and ideas of those exalted Houyhnhnms. - -As soon as I entered the house, my wife took me in her arms and kissed -me; at which, having not been used to the touch of that odious animal -for so many years, I fell into a swoon for almost an hour. At the time -I am writing, it is five years since my last return to England. During -the first year, I could not endure my wife and children in my presence; -the smell of them was intolerable; much less could I suffer them to -eat in the same room. To this hour they dare not presume to touch my -bread, or drink out of the same cup, neither was I ever able to let one -of them take me by the hand. The first money I laid out was to buy two -young horses, which I keep in a good stable; and next to them the groom -is my greatest favorite; for I feel my spirits revived by the smell -he contracts in the stable. My horses understand me tolerably well; I -converse with them at least four hours every day. They are strangers to -bridle and saddle; they live in great amity with me, and friendship to -each other. - - - - -CHAPTER XII - - THE AUTHOR’S VERACITY—HIS DESIGN IN PUBLISHING THIS WORK—HIS - CENSURE OF THOSE TRAVELERS WHO SWERVE FROM THE TRUTH—THE AUTHOR - CLEARS HIMSELF FROM ANY SINISTER ENDS IN WRITING—AN OBJECTION - ANSWERED—THE METHOD OF PLANTING COLONIES—HIS NATIVE COUNTRY - COMMENDED—THE RIGHT OF THE CROWN TO THOSE COUNTRIES DESCRIBED - BY THE AUTHOR IS JUSTIFIED—THE DIFFICULTY OF CONQUERING - THEM—THE AUTHOR TAKES HIS LAST LEAVE OF THE READER; PROPOSES - HIS MANNER OF LIVING FOR THE FUTURE; GIVES GOOD ADVICE, AND - CONCLUDES. - - -Thus gentle reader, I have given thee a faithful history of my travels -for sixteen years and above seven months; wherein I have not been so -studious of ornament as of truth. I could perhaps, like others, have -astonished thee with strange improbable tales; but I rather chose to -relate plain matter of fact in the simplest manner and style, because my -principal design was to inform, and not to amuse thee. - -It is easy for us to travel into remote countries, which are seldom -visited by Englishmen or other Europeans, to form descriptions of -wonderful animals both at sea and land. Whereas a traveler’s chief aim -should be to make men wiser and better, and to improve their minds by the -bad, as well as good example, of what they deliver concerning foreign -places. - -I could heartily wish a law was enacted, that every traveler, before -he were permitted to publish his voyages, should be obliged to make -oath before the lord high chancellor, that all he intended to print -was absolutely true to the best of his knowledge; for then the world -would no longer be deceived, as it usually is, while some writers, to -make their works pass the better upon the public, impose the grossest -falsities on the unwary reader. I have perused several books of travels -with great delight in my younger days; but having since gone over most -parts of the globe, and been able to contradict many fabulous accounts -from my own observation, it has given me a great disgust against this -part of reading, and some indignation to see the credulity of mankind so -impudently abused. Therefore, since my acquaintance were pleased to think -my poor endeavors might not be unacceptable to my country, I imposed on -myself as a maxim never to be swerved from, that I would strictly adhere -to truth; neither indeed can I be ever under the least temptation to vary -from it, while I retain in my mind the lectures and example of my noble -master and the other illustrious Houyhnhnms of whom I had so long the -honor to be a humble hearer. - - _... Nec si miserum Fortuna Sinonem_ - _Finxit, vanum etiam, mendacemque improba finget._ - -I know very well, how little reputation is to be got by writings which -require neither genius nor learning, nor indeed any other talent except -a good memory, or an exact journal. I know likewise, that writers of -travels, like dictionary-makers, are sunk into oblivion by the weight -and bulk of those who come after, and therefore lie uppermost. As it -is highly probable, that such travelers who shall hereafter visit the -countries described in this work of mine, may, by detecting my errors (if -there be any), and adding many new discoveries of their own, jostle me -out of vogue, and stand in my place, making the world forget that I was -ever an author. This indeed would be too great a mortification, if I -wrote for fame; but as my sole intention was the public good, I cannot be -altogether disappointed. For who can read of the virtues I have mentioned -in the glorious Houyhnhnms, without being ashamed of his own vices, when -he considers himself as the reasoning, governing animal of his country? -I shall say nothing of those remote nations where the _yahoos_ preside; -among which the least corrupted are the Brobdingnagians, whose wise -maxims in morality and government it would be our happiness to observe. -But I forbear descanting farther, and rather leave the judicious reader -to his own remarks and application. - -I am not a little pleased that this work of mine can possibly meet -with no censurers; for what objections can be made against a writer -who relates only plain facts that happened in such distant countries, -where we have not the least interest with respect either to trade or -negotiations? I have carefully avoided every fault with which common -writers of travels are often too justly charged. Besides, I meddle not -with any party, but write without passion, prejudice, or ill will against -any man, or number of men whatsoever. I write for the noblest end, to -inform and instruct mankind; over whom I may, without breach of modesty, -pretend to some superiority, from the advantages I received by conversing -so long among the most accomplished Houyhnhnms. I write without any view -to profit or praise. I never suffer a word to pass that may look like -reflection, or possibly give the least offense, even to those who are -most ready to take it. So that I hope I may with justice pronounce myself -an author perfectly blameless; against whom the tribes of answerers, -considerers, observers, reflectors, detecters, remarkers, will never be -able to find matter for exercising their talents. - -I confess, it was whispered to me that I was bound in duty, as a subject -of England, to have given in a memorial to a secretary of state at my -first coming over; because whatever lands are discovered by a subject, -belong to the crown. But I doubt whether our conquests in the countries I -treat of, would be as easy as those of Ferdinando Cortez over the naked -Americans. The Lilliputians, I think, are hardly worth the charge of a -fleet and an army to reduce them; and I question whether it might be -prudent or safe to attempt the Brobdingnagians; or whether an English -army would be much at their ease with the Flying Island over their -heads. The Houyhnhnms indeed appear not to be so well prepared for war, -a science to which they are perfect strangers, and especially against -missive weapons. However, supposing myself to be a minister of state, I -could never give my advice for invading them. Their prudence, unanimity, -unacquaintedness with fear, and their love of their country, would amply -supply all defects in the military art. Imagine twenty thousand of them -breaking into the midst of a European army, confounding the ranks, -overturning the carriages, battering the warriors’ faces into mummy by -terrible yerks from their hinder hoofs; for they would well deserve the -character given to Augustus, _Recalcitrat undique tutus_. But instead -of proposals for conquering that magnanimous nation, I rather wish they -were in a capacity, or disposition, to send a sufficient number of their -inhabitants for civilizing Europe, by teaching us the first principles of -honor, justice, truth, temperance, public spirit, fortitude, chastity, -friendship, benevolence, and fidelity. The names of all which virtues are -still retained among us in most languages, and are to be met with in -modern as well as ancient authors; which I am able to assert from my own -small reading. - -But I had another reason, which made me less forward to enlarge his -majesty’s dominions by my discoveries. To say the truth, I had conceived -a few scruples with relation to the distributive justice of princes upon -those occasions. For instance, a crew of pirates are driven by a storm -they know not whither; at length a boy discovers land from the topmast; -they go on shore to rob and plunder; they see a harmless people; are -entertained with kindness; they give the country a new name; they take -formal possession of it for their king; they set up a rotten plank, or -a stone, for a memorial; they murder two or three dozen of the natives, -bring away a couple more by force, for a sample; return home, and get -their pardon. Here commences a new dominion, acquired with a title by -divine right. Ships are sent with the first opportunity; the natives -driven out, or destroyed; their princes tortured to discover their gold; -a free license given to all acts of inhumanity and lust, the earth -reeking with the blood of its inhabitants; and this execrable crew of -butchers, employed in so pious an expedition, is a modern colony, sent to -convert and civilize an idolatrous and barbarous people. - -But this description, I confess, does by no means affect the British -nation, who may be an example to the whole world for their wisdom, -care, and justice in planting colonies; their liberal endowments for -the advancement of religion and learning; their choice of devout and -able pastors to propagate Christianity; their caution in stocking their -provinces with people of sober lives and conversations from this the -mother kingdom; their strict regard to the distribution of justice, -in supplying the civil administration through all their colonies with -officers of the greatest abilities, utter strangers to corruption; and, -to crown all, by sending the most vigilant and virtuous governors, who -have no other views than the happiness of the people over whom they -preside, and the honor of the king their master. - -But as those countries which I have described, do not appear to have -any desire of being conquered and enslaved, murdered or driven out, by -colonies; nor abound either in gold, silver, sugar, or tobacco; I did -humbly conceive, they were by no means proper objects of our zeal, our -valor or our interest. However, if those whom it more concerns think fit -to be of another opinion, I am ready to depose, when I shall be lawfully -called, that no European did ever visit those countries before me. I -mean, if the inhabitants ought to be believed, unless a dispute may arise -concerning the two _yahoos_, said to have been seen many years ago upon -a mountain in Houyhnhnmland, whence the opinion is, that the race of -those brutes has descended; and these, for anything I know, may have been -English. This, indeed, I was apt to suspect from the lineaments of their -posterity’s countenances, although they were much defaced. But how far -that will go toward making out a title, I leave to the learned in colony -law. - -But as to the formality of taking possession in my sovereign’s name, it -never came once into my thoughts; and if it had, yet, as my affairs then -stood, I should perhaps, in point of prudence and self-preservation, have -put it off to a better opportunity. - -Having thus answered the only objection that can ever be raised against -me as a traveler, I here take a final leave of all my courteous readers, -and return to enjoy my own speculations in my little garden at Redriff; -to apply those excellent lessons of virtue which I learned among the -Houyhnhnms; to instruct the _yahoos_ of my own family, as far as I shall -find them docile animals; to behold my figure often in a glass, and thus, -if possible, habituate myself by time to tolerate the sight of a human -creature; to lament the brutality of Houyhnhnms in my own country, but -always treat their persons with respect, for the sake of my noble master, -his family, his friends, and the whole Houyhnhnm race, whom these of -ours have the honor to resemble in all their lineaments, however their -intellectuals came to degenerate. - -I began last week to permit my wife to sit at dinner with me, at the -farthest end of a long table; and to answer (but with the utmost brevity) -the few questions I asked her. Yet the smell of a _yahoo_ continuing very -offensive, I always keep my nose well stopped with rue, lavender, or -tobacco leaves. And although it be hard for a man late in life to remove -old habits, I am not altogether out of hopes, in some time, to suffer a -neighbor _yahoo_ in my company, without the apprehensions I am yet under -of his teeth or his claws. - -My reconcilement to the _yahoo_ kind in general might not be so -difficult, if they would be content with those vices and follies only, -which nature has entitled them to. I am not in the least provoked at the -sight of a lawyer, a pickpocket, a colonel, a fool, a lord, a gamester, a -politician, a physician, an evidence, a suborner, an attorney, a traitor, -or the like; this is all according to the due course of things: but when -I behold a lump of deformity and diseases, both in body and mind, smitten -with pride, it immediately breaks all the measures of my patience; -neither shall I be ever able to comprehend how such an animal, and such a -vice, could tally together. The wise and virtuous Houyhnhnms, who abound -in all the excellencies that can adorn a rational creature, have no name -for this vice in their language; which has no terms to express anything -that is evil, except those whereby they describe the detestable qualities -of their _yahoos_; among which they were not able to distinguish this -of pride for want of thoroughly understanding human nature, as it shows -itself in other countries where that animal presides. But I, who had more -experience, could plainly observe some rudiments of it among the wild -_yahoos_. - -But the Houyhnhnms, who live under the government of reason, are no more -proud of the good qualities they possess than I should be for not wanting -a leg or an arm; which no man in his wits would boast of, although he -must be miserable without them. I dwell the longer upon this subject, -from the desire I have to make the society of an English _yahoo_ by any -means not insupportable; and therefore I here entreat those who have any -tincture of this absurd vice, that they will not presume to come in my -sight. - - -THE END - -*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK GULLIVER'S TRAVELS *** - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will -be renamed. - -Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright -law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, -so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the -United States without permission and without paying copyright -royalties. Special rules, set forth in the General Terms of Use part -of this license, apply to copying and distributing Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works to protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm -concept and trademark. 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