diff options
| author | nfenwick <nfenwick@pglaf.org> | 2025-02-04 12:18:53 -0800 |
|---|---|---|
| committer | nfenwick <nfenwick@pglaf.org> | 2025-02-04 12:18:53 -0800 |
| commit | c80cddc1b5c101e683cc030d5c7ec8b777ab9eb8 (patch) | |
| tree | d3d1be189e40650ee9518517955a9dccbe6905b0 | |
| parent | 2bb569f43e5f1b23a37beb03cfe17207c42b4d3d (diff) | |
| -rw-r--r-- | .gitattributes | 4 | ||||
| -rw-r--r-- | LICENSE.txt | 11 | ||||
| -rw-r--r-- | README.md | 2 | ||||
| -rw-r--r-- | old/63890-h.zip | bin | 513961 -> 0 bytes | |||
| -rw-r--r-- | old/63890-h/63890-h.htm | 1324 | ||||
| -rw-r--r-- | old/63890-h/images/cover.jpg | bin | 259141 -> 0 bytes | |||
| -rw-r--r-- | old/63890-h/images/illus.jpg | bin | 235036 -> 0 bytes | |||
| -rw-r--r-- | old/63890.txt | 1224 | ||||
| -rw-r--r-- | old/63890.zip | bin | 19472 -> 0 bytes |
9 files changed, 17 insertions, 2548 deletions
diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..d7b82bc --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,4 @@ +*.txt text eol=lf +*.htm text eol=lf +*.html text eol=lf +*.md text eol=lf diff --git a/LICENSE.txt b/LICENSE.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6312041 --- /dev/null +++ b/LICENSE.txt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +This eBook, including all associated images, markup, improvements, +metadata, and any other content or labor, has been confirmed to be +in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES. + +Procedures for determining public domain status are described in +the "Copyright How-To" at https://www.gutenberg.org. + +No investigation has been made concerning possible copyrights in +jurisdictions other than the United States. Anyone seeking to utilize +this eBook outside of the United States should confirm copyright +status under the laws that apply to them. diff --git a/README.md b/README.md new file mode 100644 index 0000000..da9d014 --- /dev/null +++ b/README.md @@ -0,0 +1,2 @@ +Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for +eBook #63890 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/63890) diff --git a/old/63890-h.zip b/old/63890-h.zip Binary files differdeleted file mode 100644 index 270cd31..0000000 --- a/old/63890-h.zip +++ /dev/null diff --git a/old/63890-h/63890-h.htm b/old/63890-h/63890-h.htm deleted file mode 100644 index 816f583..0000000 --- a/old/63890-h/63890-h.htm +++ /dev/null @@ -1,1324 +0,0 @@ -<!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Strict//EN" - "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-strict.dtd"> -<html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml" xml:lang="en" lang="en"> - <head> - <meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html;charset=us-ascii" /> - <meta http-equiv="Content-Style-Type" content="text/css" /> - <title> - The Project Gutenberg eBook of A Planet Named Joe, by S. A. Lombino. - </title> - <link rel="coverpage" href="images/cover.jpg" /> - - <style type="text/css"> - -body { - margin-left: 10%; - margin-right: 10%; -} - - h1,h2 { - text-align: center; /* all headings centered */ - clear: both; -} - -p { - margin-top: .51em; - text-align: justify; - margin-bottom: .49em; -} - -hr { - width: 33%; - margin-top: 2em; - margin-bottom: 2em; - margin-left: 33.5%; - margin-right: 33.5%; - clear: both; -} - -hr.chap {width: 65%; margin-left: 17.5%; margin-right: 17.5%;} -hr.tb {width: 45%; margin-left: 27.5%; margin-right: 27.5%;} - -.center {text-align: center;} - -.right {text-align: right;} - -/* Images */ -.figcenter { - margin: auto; - text-align: center; -} - -div.titlepage { - text-align: center; - page-break-before: always; - page-break-after: always; -} - -div.titlepage p { - text-align: center; - text-indent: 0em; - font-weight: bold; - line-height: 1.5; - margin-top: 3em; -} - - </style> - </head> -<body> - - -<pre> - -The Project Gutenberg EBook of A Planet Named Joe, by S. A. Lombino - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most -other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions -whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of -the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at -www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have -to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook. - -Title: A Planet Named Joe - -Author: S. A. Lombino - -Release Date: November 27, 2020 [EBook #63890] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: ASCII - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A PLANET NAMED JOE *** - - - - -Produced by Greg Weeks, Mary Meehan and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net - - - - - - -</pre> - - -<div class="titlepage"> - -<h1>A PLANET NAMED JOE</h1> - -<h2>By S. A. LOMBINO</h2> - -<p><i>There were more Joes on Venus than you could shake<br /> -a ray-gun at. Perhaps there was method in Colonel<br /> -Walsh's madness—murder-madness—when he ordered Major<br /> -Polk to scan the planet for a guy named Joe.</i></p> - -<p>[Transcriber's Note: This etext was produced from Planet Stories<br /> -November 1952. Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that the<br /> -U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.]</p> - -</div> - -<hr class="chap" /> - -<p>Colonel Walsh had a great sense of humor. I hated his guts ever since -we went through the Academy together, but he had a great sense of humor.</p> - -<p>For example, he could have chosen a Second Looie for the job on Venus. -He might even have picked a Captain. But he liked me about as much as -I liked him, and so he decided the job was just right for a Major. At -least, that's what he told me.</p> - -<p>I stood at attention before his desk in the Patrol Station. We were -somewhere in Area Two on Earth, takeoff point for any operations in -Space II. The duty was fine, and I liked it a lot. Come to think of -it, the most I ever did was inspect a few defective tubes every now and -then. The rest was gravy, and Colonel Walsh wasn't going to let me get -by with gravy.</p> - -<p>"It will be a simple assignment, Major," he said to me, peering over -his fingers. He held them up in front of him like a cathedral.</p> - -<p>"Yes, sir," I said.</p> - -<p>"It will involve finding one man, a Venusian native."</p> - -<p>I wanted to say, "Then why the hell don't you send a green kid on -the job? Why me?" Instead, I nodded and watched him playing with his -fingers.</p> - -<p>"The man is a trader of sorts. Rather intelligent." He paused, then -added, "For a native, that is."</p> - -<p>I had never liked Walsh's attitude toward natives. I hadn't liked the -way he'd treated the natives on Mars ever since he'd taken over there. -Which brought to mind an important point.</p> - -<p>"I always figured Venus was under the jurisdiction of Space III, sir. I -thought our activities were confined to Mars."</p> - -<p>He folded his fingers like a deck of cards and dropped them on his desk -as if he were waiting for me to cut.</p> - -<p>"Mmmm," he said, "yes, that's true. But this is a special job. It so -happens this Venusian is the one man who can help us understand just -what's happening on Mars."</p> - -<p>I tried to picture a Venusian understanding Mars and I didn't get very -far.</p> - -<p>"He's had many dealings with the natives there," Walsh explained. "If -anyone can tell us the reasons for the revolt, he can."</p> - -<p>If Walsh really wanted to know the reasons for the revolt, I could give -them to him in one word: Walsh. I had to laugh at the way he called -it "revolt." It had been going on for six months now and we'd lost at -least a thousand men from Space II. Revolt.</p> - -<p>"And this man is on Venus now?" I asked for confirmation. I'd never -been to Venus, being in Space II ever since I'd left the Moon run. It -was just like Walsh to ship me off to a strange place.</p> - -<p>"Yes, Major," he said. "This man is on Venus."</p> - -<p>At the Academy he had called me Fred. That was before I'd reported -him for sleeping on Boiler Watch. He'd goofed off on a pile of uranium -that could've, and almost did, blow the barracks sky-high that night. -He still thought it was my fault, as if I'd done the wrong thing by -reporting him. And now, through the fouled-up machinery that exists in -any military organization, he outranked me.</p> - -<p>"And the man's name, sir?"</p> - -<p>"Joe." A tight smile played on his face.</p> - -<p>"Joe what?" I asked.</p> - -<p>"Just Joe."</p> - -<p>"Just Joe?"</p> - -<p>"Yes," Walsh said. "A native, you know. They rarely go in for more than -first names. But then, it should be simple to find a man with a name -like Joe. Among the natives, I mean."</p> - -<p>"I don't know, sir."</p> - -<p>"A relatively simple assignment," Walsh said.</p> - -<p>"Can you tell me anything else about this man? Physical appearance? -Personal habits? Anything?"</p> - -<p>Walsh seemed to consider this for a moment. "Well, physically he's like -any of the other Venusians, so I can't give you much help there. He -does have a peculiar habit, though."</p> - -<p>"What's that?"</p> - -<p>"He has an affinity for Terran cigarettes."</p> - -<p>I sighed. "Well, it's not very much to go on."</p> - -<p>"You'll find him," Walsh said, grinning. "I'm sure of it."</p> - -<hr class="tb" /> - -<p>The trip to Venus came off without a hitch. I did a lot of thinking on -that trip. I thought about Mars and the revolt there. And I thought -about Colonel Leonard Walsh and how he was supposed to be quelling that -revolt. Ever since Walsh had taken command, ever since he'd started -pushing the natives around, there'd been trouble. It was almost as if -the whole damned planet had blown up in our faces the moment he took -over. Swell guy, Walsh.</p> - -<p>Venus was hotter than I'd expected it to be. Much too hot for the tunic -I was wearing. It smelled, too. A funny smell I couldn't place. Like -a mixture of old shoe and after-shave. There were plants everywhere -I looked. Big plants and small ones, some blooming with flowers I'd -never seen before, and some as bare as cactus.</p> - -<p>I recognized a blue figure as one of the natives the pilot had told me -about. He was tall, looking almost human except that everything about -him was elongated. His features, his muscles, everything seemed to have -been stretched like a rubber band. I kept expecting him to pop back to -normal. Instead, he flashed a double row of brilliant teeth at me.</p> - -<p>I wondered if he spoke English. "Hey, boy," I called.</p> - -<p>He ambled over with long-legged strides that closed the distance -between us in seconds.</p> - -<p>"Call me Joe," he said.</p> - -<p>I dropped my bags and stared at him. Maybe this <i>was</i> going to be a -simple assignment after all. "I sure am glad to see you, Joe," I said.</p> - -<p>"Same here, Toots," he answered.</p> - -<p>"The guys back in Space II are searching high and low for you," I told -him.</p> - -<p>"You've got the wrong number," he said, and I was a little surprised at -his use of Terran idiom.</p> - -<p>"You are Joe, aren't you? Joe the trader?"</p> - -<p>"I'm Joe, all right," he said. "Only thing I ever traded, though, was a -pocketknife. Got a set of keys for it."</p> - -<p>"Oh," I said, my voice conveying my disappointment. I sighed and began -wondering just how I should go about contacting the Joe I was looking -for. My orders said I was to report to Captain Bransten immediately -upon arrival. I figured the hell with Captain Bransten. I outranked him -anyway, and there wasn't much he could do if I decided to stop for a -drink first.</p> - -<p>"Where's the Officer's Club?" I asked the Venusian.</p> - -<p>"Are you buying information or are you just curious?"</p> - -<p>"Can you take me there?" I asked.</p> - -<p>"Sure thing, Toots." He picked up my bags and started walking up a -heavily overgrown path. We'd probably walked for about ten minutes when -he dropped my bags and said, "There it is."</p> - -<p>The Officer's Club was a plasteel hut with window shields that -protected it from the heat of the sun. It didn't look too comfortable -but I really wanted that drink. I reached into my tunic and slipped -the native thirty solars.</p> - -<p>He stared at the credits curiously and then shrugged his shoulders. "Oh -well, you're new here. We'll let it go."</p> - -<p>He took off then, while I stared after him, wondering just what he'd -meant. Had I tipped him too little?</p> - -<p>I shrugged and looked over at the Officer's Club. From the outside it -looked as hot as hell.</p> - -<p>On the inside it was about two degrees short of that mark. I began to -curse Walsh for taking me away from my nice soft job in Space II.</p> - -<p>There wasn't much inside the club. A few tables and chairs, a dart game -and a bar. Behind the bar a tall Venusian lounged.</p> - -<p>I walked over and asked, "What are you serving, pal?"</p> - -<p>"Call me Joe," he answered.</p> - -<p>He caught me off balance. "What?"</p> - -<p>"Joe," he said again.</p> - -<p>A faint glimmer of understanding began to penetrate my thick skull. -"You wouldn't happen to be Joe the trader? The guy who knows all about -Mars, would you?"</p> - -<p>"I never left home," he said simply. "What are you drinking?"</p> - -<p>That rat! That dirty, filthy, stinking, unprincipled....</p> - -<p><i>But then, it should be simple to find a man with a name like</i> Joe. -<i>Among the natives, I mean.</i></p> - -<p>Sure. Oh sure. Real simple. Walsh was about the lowest, most -contemptible....</p> - -<p>"What are you drinking, pal?" the Venusian asked again.</p> - -<p>"Skip it," I said. "How do I get to the captain's shack?"</p> - -<p>"Follow your nose, pal. Can't miss it."</p> - -<p>I started to pick up my bag as another Venusian entered. He waved at -the bartender.</p> - -<p>"Hello, Joe," he said. "How's it going?"</p> - -<p>"Not so hot, Joe," the bartender replied.</p> - -<p>I listened in fascination. Joe, Joe, Joe. So this was Walsh's idea of a -great gag. Very funny. Very....</p> - -<p>"You Major Polk, sweetheart?" the Venusian who'd just come in asked.</p> - -<p>"Yes," I said, still thinking of Colonel Walsh.</p> - -<p>"You better get your butt over to the captain's shack," he said. "He's -about ready to post you as overdue."</p> - -<p>"Sure," I said wearily. "Will you take my bags, please?"</p> - -<p>"Roger," he answered. He picked up the bags and nodded at the bar.</p> - -<p>"So long, Joe," he said to the bartender.</p> - -<p>"See you, Joe," the bartender called back.</p> - -<hr class="tb" /> - -<p>Captain Bransten was a mousey, unimpressive sort of man. He was wearing -a tropical tunic, but he still resembled a wilted lily more than he did -an officer.</p> - -<p>"Have a seat, Major," he offered. He reached for a cigarette box on the -desk and extended it to me. He coughed in embarrassment when he saw it -was empty. Quickly, he pressed a button on his desk and the door popped -open. A tall, blue Venusian stepped lithely into the room.</p> - -<p>"Sir?" the Venusian asked.</p> - -<p>"We're out of cigarettes, Joe," the Captain said. "Will you get us -some, please?"</p> - -<p>"Sure thing," the Venusian answered. He smiled broadly and closed the -door behind him.</p> - -<p><i>Another Joe</i>, I thought. <i>Another damned Joe.</i></p> - -<p>"They steal them," Captain Bransten said abruptly.</p> - -<p>"Steal what?" I asked.</p> - -<p>"Cigarettes. I sometimes think the cigarette is one of the few things -they like about Terran culture."</p> - -<p>So Walsh had taken care of that angle too. <i>He does have a peculiar -habit, though. He has an affinity for Terran cigarettes.</i> Cigarettes -was the tip I should have given; not solars.</p> - -<p>"All right," I said, "suppose we start at the beginning."</p> - -<p>Captain Bransten opened his eyes wide. "Sir?" he asked.</p> - -<p>"What's with all this Joe business? It may be a very original name but -I think its popularity here is a little outstanding."</p> - -<p>Captain Bransten began to chuckle softly. I personally didn't think it -was so funny. I tossed him my withering Superior Officer's gaze and -waited for his explanation.</p> - -<p>"I hadn't realized this was your first time on Venus," he said.</p> - -<p>"Is there a local hero named Joe?" I asked.</p> - -<p>"No, no, nothing like that," he assured me. "It's a simple culture, you -know. Not nearly as developed as Mars."</p> - -<p>"I can see that," I said bitingly.</p> - -<p>"And the natives are only now becoming acquainted with Terran culture. -Lots of enlisted men, you know."</p> - -<p>I began to get the idea. And I began to appreciate Walsh's doubtful -ancestry more keenly.</p> - -<p>"It's impossible to tell exactly where it all started, of course," -Bransten was saying.</p> - -<p>I was beginning to get angry. Very angry. I was thinking of Walsh -sitting back in a nice cozy foam chair back on Earth.</p> - -<p>"Get to the point, Captain!" I barked.</p> - -<p>"Easy, sir," Bransten said, turning pale. I could see that the Captain -wasn't used to entertaining Majors. "The enlisted men. You know how -they are. They'll ask a native to do something and they'll call him -Joe. 'Hey, Joe, give me a hand with this.' Or 'Listen, Joe, how'd you -like to earn some cigarettes?' Do you follow?"</p> - -<p>"I follow, all right," I said bitterly.</p> - -<p>"Well," Bransten went on, "that sort of thing mushrooms. The natives -are a simple, almost childish people. It appealed to them—the Joe -business, I mean. Now they're all Joe. They like it. That and the -cigarettes."</p> - -<p>He cleared his throat and looked at me apologetically as if he were -personally responsible for Venusian culture. In fact, he looked as if -he were responsible for having put Venus in the heavens in the first -place.</p> - -<p>"Do you understand, Major? Just a case of extended idiom, that's all."</p> - -<p>Just a case of extended <i>idiot</i>, I thought. An idiot on a wild goose -chase a hell of a long way from home.</p> - -<p>"I understand perfectly," I snapped. "Where are my quarters?"</p> - -<p>Bransten asked a Venusian named Joe to show me my quarters, reminding -me that chow was at thirteen hundred. As I was leaving, the first -Venusian came back with the cigarettes Bransten had ordered.</p> - -<p>I could tell by the look on his face that he probably had half a carton -stuffed into his pockets. I shrugged and went to change into a tropical -tunic.</p> - -<p>I called Earth right after chow. The Captain assured me that this sort -of thing was definitely against regulations, but he submitted when I -twinkled my little gold leaf under his nose.</p> - -<p>Walsh's face appeared on the screen. He was smiling, looking like a fat -pussy cat.</p> - -<p>"What is it, Major?" he asked.</p> - -<p>"This man Joe," I said. "Can you give me any more on him?"</p> - -<p>Walsh's grin grew wider. "Why, Major," he said, "you're not having any -difficulties, are you?"</p> - -<p>"None at all," I snapped back. "I just thought I'd be able to find him -a lot sooner if...."</p> - -<p>"Take your time, Major," Walsh beamed. "There's no rush at all."</p> - -<p>"I thought...."</p> - -<p>"I'm sure you can do the job," Walsh cut in. "I wouldn't have sent you -otherwise."</p> - -<p>Hell, I was through kidding around. "Look...."</p> - -<p>"He's somewhere in the jungle, you know," Walsh said.</p> - -<p>I wanted to ram my fist into the screen, right smack up against those -big white teeth. Instead, I cut off the transmission and watched the -surprised look on his face as his screen went blank millions of miles -away.</p> - -<p>He blinked at the screen, trying to realize I'd deliberately hung up on -him.</p> - -<p>"Polk!" he shouted, "can you hear me?"</p> - -<p>I smiled, saw the twisted hatred on his features, and then the screen -on my end went blank, too.</p> - -<p><i>He's somewhere in the jungle, you know.</i></p> - -<p>I thanked Captain Bransten for his hospitality and went back to my -quarters.</p> - -<p>As I saw it, there were two courses for me to follow.</p> - -<p>One: I could say the hell with Walsh and Venus. That would mean hopping -the next ship back to Earth.</p> - -<p>It would also mean disobeying the direct order of a superior officer. -It might mean demotion, and it might mean getting bounced out of the -Service altogether.</p> - -<p>Two: I could assume there really was a guy name Joe somewhere in that -jungle, a Joe separate and apart from the other Joes on this planet, a -trader Joe who knew the Martians well. I could always admit failure, of -course, and return empty handed. Mission not accomplished. Or, I might -really find a guy who was trader Joe.</p> - -<p>I made my decision quickly. I wanted to stay in the Service, and -besides Walsh may have been on the level for the first time in his -life. Maybe there was a Joe here who could help us on Mars. If there -was I'd try to find him. It was still a hell of a trick though.</p> - -<p>I cursed Walsh again and pushed the buzzer near my bed.</p> - -<p>A tall Venusian stepped into the room.</p> - -<p>"Joe?" I asked, just to be sure.</p> - -<p>"Who else, boss?" he answered.</p> - -<p>"I'm trying to locate someone," I said. "I'll need a guide to take me -into the jungle. Can you get me one?"</p> - -<p>"It'll cost you, boss," the Venusian said.</p> - -<p>"How much?"</p> - -<p>"Two cartons of cigarettes at least."</p> - -<p>"Who's the guide?" I asked.</p> - -<p>"How's the price sound?"</p> - -<p>"Fine, fine," I said impatiently. And the Captain had said they were -almost a childish people!</p> - -<p>"His name is Joe," the Venusian told me. "Best damn guide on the -planet. Take you anywhere you want to go, do anything you want to do. -Courageous. Doesn't know the meaning of fear. I've known him to...."</p> - -<p>"Skip it," I said, cutting the promotion short. "Tell him to show up -around fifteen hundred with a complete list of what we'll need."</p> - -<p>The Venusian started to leave.</p> - -<p>"And Joe," I said, stopping him at the door, "I hope you're not -overlooking your commission on the deal."</p> - -<p>His face broke into a wide grin. "No danger of that, boss," he said.</p> - -<p>When he was gone I began figuring out a plan of action. Obviously, I'd -just have to traipse through the jungle looking for a guy named Joe on -a planet where everyone was named Joe. Everybody, at least, but the -Captain, the small garrison attached to the Station, and me.</p> - -<hr class="tb" /> - -<p>I began wondering why Walsh had gone to so much trouble to get rid of -me. The job, as I saw it, would take a hell of a long time. It seemed -like a silly thing to do, just to get even with a guy for something -that had happened years ago. He surely must have realized that I'd be -back again, sooner or later. Maybe he had another little junket all set -for me.</p> - -<p>Or maybe he didn't expect me to come back.</p> - -<p>The thought hadn't occurred to me before this, and I began to consider -it seriously. Walsh was no good, rotten clear through. He was failing -at the job of keeping Mars in hand, and he probably realized that a -few more mistakes on his part would mean the end of his career with -Space II. I chuckled as I thought of him isolated in some God-forsaken -place like Space V or Space VII. This probably bothered him a lot, too. -But what probably bothered him more was the fact that I was next in -command. If he were transferred, I'd be in charge of Space II, and I -could understand how much that would appeal to Walsh.</p> - -<p>I tried to figure the thing out sensibly, tried to weigh his good -points against his bad. But it all came back to the same thing. A -guy who would deliberately go to sleep on Boiler Watch with a ton of -uranium ready to blast a barracks to smithereens if it wasn't watched, -would deliberately do just about anything.</p> - -<p>Sending me off on a wild goose chase after a character named Joe may -have been a gag. But it may have been something a little grimmer than a -gag, and I made up my mind to be extremely careful from here on in.</p> - -<p>The guide arrived at fifteen hundred on the dot. He was tall, -elongated, looked almost like all the other Venusians I'd seen so far.</p> - -<p>"I understand you need a Grade A guide, sir," he said.</p> - -<p>"Are you familiar with the jungle?" I asked him.</p> - -<p>"Born and raised there, sir. Know it like the back of my hand."</p> - -<p>"Has Joe told you what the payment will be?"</p> - -<p>"Yes, sir. A carton and a half of cigarettes."</p> - -<p>I thought about Joe deducting his commission and smiled.</p> - -<p>"When can we leave?"</p> - -<p>"Right away, sir. We won't need much really. I've made a list of -supplies and I can get them in less than an hour. I suggest you wear -light clothing, boots, and a hat."</p> - -<p>"Will I need a weapon?"</p> - -<p>He looked at me, his eyes faintly amused. "Why, what for, sir?"</p> - -<p>"Never mind," I said. "What's your name, by the way?"</p> - -<p>He lifted his eyebrows, and his eyes widened in his narrow face. He was -definitely surprised.</p> - -<p>"Joe," he said. "Didn't you know?"</p> - -<hr class="tb" /> - -<p>When we'd been out for a while I discovered why Joe had suggested the -boots and the hat. The undergrowth was often sharp and jagged and it -would have sliced my legs to ribbons were they not protected by the -high boots. The hat kept the strong sun off my head.</p> - -<p>Joe was an excellent guide and a pleasant companion. He seemed to be -enjoying a great romp, seemed to love the jungle and take a secret -pleasure in the work he was doing. There were times when I couldn't -see three feet ahead of me. He'd stand stock still for a few minutes, -his head barely moving, his eyes darting from one plant to another. -Then he'd say, "This way," and take off into what looked like more -impenetrable jungle invariably to find a little path leading directly -to another village.</p> - -<p>Each village was the same. The natives would come running out of their -huts, tall and blue, shouting, "Cigarettes, Joe? Cigarettes?" It took -me a while to realize they were addressing me and not my guide.</p> - -<p>Everybody was Joe. It was one beautiful, happy, joyous round of -stinking, hot jungle. And I wasn't getting any nearer my man. Nor had -I any idea how I was supposed to find him. I began to feel pretty low -about the whole affair.</p> - -<p>Joe, on the other hand, enjoyed every moment of the trip. In each -village he greeted the natives cheerfully, told them stories, swapped -gossip and jokes. And when it was time to leave, he would say goodbye -to all his friends and we would plunge into the twisted foliage again.</p> - -<p>His spirits were always high and he never failed to say the right thing -that would give a momentary lift to my own depressed state of mind. He -would talk for hours on end as we hacked our way through the jungle.</p> - -<p>"I like Venus," he said once. "I would never leave it."</p> - -<p>"Have you ever been to Earth?" I asked.</p> - -<p>"No," Joe replied. "I like Terrans too, you understand. They are good -for Venus. And they are fun."</p> - -<p>"Fun?" I asked, thinking of a particular species of Terran: species -Leonard Walsh.</p> - -<p>"Yes, yes," he said wholeheartedly. "They joke and they laugh and ... -well, you know."</p> - -<p>"I suppose so," I admitted.</p> - -<p>Joe smiled secretly, and we pushed on. I began to find, more and more, -that I had started to talk freely to Joe. In the beginning he had been -just my guide. There had been the strained relationship of employer and -employee. But as the days lengthened into weeks, the formal atmosphere -began to crumble. I found myself telling him all about Earth, about -the people there, about my decision to attend the Academy, the rigid -tests, the grind, even the Moon run. Joe was a good listener, nodding -sympathetically, finding experiences in his own life to parallel my own.</p> - -<p>And as our relationship progressed from a casual one to a definitely -friendly one, Joe seemed more enthusiastic than ever to keep up our -grinding pace to find what we were looking for.</p> - -<p>Once we stopped in a clearing to rest. Joe lounged on the matted -greenery, his long body stretched out in front of him, the knife -gleaming in his belt. I'd seen him slash his way through thick, tangled -vines with that knife, his long, muscular arms powerfully slicing -through them like strips of silk.</p> - -<p>"How far are we from the Station?" I asked.</p> - -<p>"Three or four Earth weeks," he replied.</p> - -<p>I sighed wearily. "Where do we go from here?"</p> - -<p>"There are more villages," he said.</p> - -<p>"We'll never find him."</p> - -<p>"Possibly," Joe mused, the smile creeping over his face again.</p> - -<p>"A wild goose chase. A fool's errand."</p> - -<p>"We'd better get started," Joe said simply.</p> - -<p>I got to my feet and we started the march again. Joe was still fresh, a -brilliant contrast to me, weary and dejected. Somehow, I had the same -feeling I'd had a long time ago on my sixteenth birthday. One of my -friends had taken me all over the city, finally dropping me off at my -own house where the whole gang was gathered for a surprise party. Joe -reminded me of that friend.</p> - -<p>"There's a village ahead," he said, and the grin on his face was large -now, his eyes shining.</p> - -<hr class="tb" /> - -<p>Something was missing here. Natives. There were no natives rushing out -to greet us. No cries of "Cigarettes? Cigarettes?" I caught up with Joe.</p> - -<p>"What's the story?" I whispered.</p> - -<p>He shrugged knowingly and continued walking.</p> - -<p>And then I saw the ship, nose pointing into space, catching the rays of -the sun like a great silver bullet.</p> - -<p>"What...?" I started.</p> - -<p>"It's all right," Joe said, smiling.</p> - -<p>The ship looked vaguely familiar. I noticed the crest of Space II near -the nose, and a lot of things became clear then. I also saw Walsh -standing near one of the huts, a stun gun in his hand.</p> - -<p>"Hello, Major," he called, almost cheerfully. The gun didn't look -cheerful, though. It was pointed at my head.</p> - -<p>"Fancy meeting you here, Colonel," I said, trying to match his -joviality. Somehow it didn't quite come off.</p> - -<p>Joe was walking beside me, waving at the colonel, beaming all over with -happiness.</p> - -<p>"I see you found your man," Walsh said.</p> - -<p>I turned rapidly. Joe nodded and kept grinning, a grin that told me he -was getting a big kick out of all this. Like a kid playing a game.</p> - -<p>I faced Walsh again. "Okay, what's it all about, pal?"</p> - -<p>"Colonel," Walsh corrected me. "You mustn't forget to say Colonel, -<i>Major</i>." He emphasized my rank, and he said it with a sort of ruthless -finality.</p> - -<p>I waited. I could see he was just busting to tell me how clever he'd -been. Besides, there wasn't much I could do but wait. Not with Walsh -pointing the stun gun at my middle.</p> - -<p>"We've come a long way since the Academy, haven't we, Major?"</p> - -<p>"If you mean in miles," I said, looking around at the plants, "we sure -have."</p> - -<p>Walsh grinned a little. "Always the wit," he said drily. And then the -smile faded from his lips and his eyes took on a hard lustre. "I'm -going to kill you, you know." He said it as if he were saying, "I think -it'll rain tomorrow."</p> - -<p>Joe almost clapped his hands together with glee. He was really enjoying -this. Another of those funny Terran games.</p> - -<p>"You gave me a powerful handicap to overcome," Walsh said. "I suppose I -should thank you, really."</p> - -<p>"You're welcome," I said.</p> - -<p>"It wasn't easy living down the disgrace you caused me."</p> - -<p>"It was your own damn fault," I said. "You knew what you were doing -when you decided to cork off."</p> - -<p>Beside me, Joe chuckled a little, enjoying the game immensely.</p> - -<p>"You didn't have to report me," Walsh said.</p> - -<p>"No? Maybe I should have forgotten all about it? Maybe I should have -nudged you and served you orange juice? So you could do it again -sometime and maybe blow up the whole damn Academy!"</p> - -<p>Walsh was silent for a long time. When he spoke his voice was barely -audible. The heat was oppressive, as if it were concentrated on this -little spot in the jungle, focusing all its penetration on a small, -unimportant drama.</p> - -<p>I could hear Joe breathing beside me.</p> - -<p>"I'm on my way out," Walsh rasped. "Finished, do you understand?"</p> - -<p>"Good," I said. And I meant it.</p> - -<p>"This Mars thing. A terrible fix. Terrible."</p> - -<p>Beside me, a slight frown crossed Joe's face. Apparently he couldn't -understand the seriousness of our voices. What had happened to the -game, the fun?</p> - -<p>"You brought the Mars business on yourself," I told Walsh. "There was -never any trouble before you took command."</p> - -<p>"The natives," he practically shouted. "They ... they...."</p> - -<p>Joe caught his breath sharply, and I wondered what Walsh was going to -say about the natives. Apparently he'd realized that Joe was a native. -Or maybe Joe's knife had something to do with it.</p> - -<p>"What about the natives?" I asked.</p> - -<p>"Nothing," Walsh said. "Nothing." He was silent for a while.</p> - -<p>"A man of my calibre," he said then, his face grim. "Dealing with -savages." He caught himself again and threw a hasty glance at Joe. -The perplexed frown had grown heavier on Joe's face. He looked at the -colonel in puzzlement.</p> - -<hr class="tb" /> - -<p>Walsh turned from Joe and raised the stun gun. I wondered if he had yet -realized that Joe was one of a million Joes scattered all over this -planet, that Joe was all the natives on Venus. That Joe was all the -natives everywhere throughout the galaxy. I looked at Walsh's eyes. He -was a sick man, alone with his thoughts in the middle of a stinking -jungle.</p> - -<p>"I'm on my way out, Major," he said, "but you won't get a chance to -succeed where I've failed. No. Oh no. I'll see to that."</p> - -<p>"And you had to come all the way to Venus to do it?"</p> - -<p>"Don't joke," Walsh snapped. "Don't joke, Major. It's not funny. It's -not funny at all."</p> - -<p>"It's pretty sad, I'd say."</p> - -<p>"You can't afford to say anything," Walsh remarked drily. "You're going -to be dead in a very few minutes."</p> - -<p>Joe's eyes widened, and I saw indecision cross his features as he tried -to understand what had happened to the game.</p> - -<p>"What'll they say back on Earth when they hear about this?" I asked.</p> - -<p>"When will they hear about it? Four, five months from now? By then, my -little trip will have been forgotten. Besides, I'm here on a routine -check. Everyone knows that."</p> - -<p>"A routine check on Venus? Mars is your territory."</p> - -<p>"One of my men is up here," Walsh said. "That gives me temporary -jurisdiction. At least enough to visit the planet and see how -conditions are. Anyway, I'll be home long before Joe here carries your -body in."</p> - -<p>Joe shook his head imperceptibly but Walsh didn't catch it.</p> - -<p>"A casualty in the jungle," Walsh continued. "The native will return -to the Station and explain the accident. I'll be back on Earth long -before he reaches there."</p> - -<p>"Sure," I said, "nice and simple. You kill me and Joe delivers the news -and takes the rap. Good old sucker Joe."</p> - -<p>"That's about enough out of you," Walsh said.</p> - -<p>"Go ahead, Colonel," I shouted. "Pull the trigger. Then run off and -leave Joe to...."</p> - -<p>"I said that's enough out of you!" Walsh shouted.</p> - -<p>I turned to face Joe. His mouth was drawn across his face in a tight -emotionless line. He stepped in front of me and stared at Walsh.</p> - -<p>"Get out of the way," Walsh commanded.</p> - -<p>Joe shook his head slowly. "This is not what you told me. A friend, you -said. A surprise. You said you wanted to...."</p> - -<p>"Get out of the way, you damned sav...."</p> - -<p>With one swift movement Joe leaped forward. The knife gleamed in his -hand and there was momentary panic on Walsh's face.</p> - -<p>The stun gun snapped up. It crackled once in the Venusian jungle, its -blast blinding me for a moment. It shuddered through Joe's left arm and -paralyzed it momentarily.</p> - -<p>But the hand with the knife was hacking away at Walsh's throat, the -blood dripping down over the silver planet on the collar of his tunic.</p> - -<hr class="chap" /> - -<div class="figcenter"> - <img src="images/illus.jpg" alt=""/> -</div> - -<hr class="chap" /> - -<p>I made my report to Bransten.</p> - -<p>I told him the body of Colonel Leonard Walsh had been discovered in the -jungle. He was barely alive when he'd been found. I'd administered aid -but his knife wounds had proved to be fatal. He died shortly after I -found him.</p> - -<p>"Awful," the captain said, "awful."</p> - -<p>I nodded sympathetically.</p> - -<p>"Did he say anything? Did he give you any idea? I mean, did he say who -did it?"</p> - -<p>"Yes," I said. "He told me who murdered him."</p> - -<p>We were standing near the platform of my ship, waiting for them to -prepare for blastoff.</p> - -<p>"Well who, Major?" he asked. "Who did he say did it?"</p> - -<p>"Joe," I explained. "A native named Joe."</p> - - - - - - - - -<pre> - - - - - -End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of A Planet Named Joe, by S. A. Lombino - -*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A PLANET NAMED JOE *** - -***** This file should be named 63890-h.htm or 63890-h.zip ***** -This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: - http://www.gutenberg.org/6/3/8/9/63890/ - -Produced by Greg Weeks, Mary Meehan and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will -be renamed. - -Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright -law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, -so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United -States without permission and without paying copyright -royalties. Special rules, set forth in the General Terms of Use part -of this license, apply to copying and distributing Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works to protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm -concept and trademark. Project Gutenberg is a registered trademark, -and may not be used if you charge for the eBooks, unless you receive -specific permission. If you do not charge anything for copies of this -eBook, complying with the rules is very easy. You may use this eBook -for nearly any purpose such as creation of derivative works, reports, -performances and research. They may be modified and printed and given -away--you may do practically ANYTHING in the United States with eBooks -not protected by U.S. copyright law. Redistribution is subject to the -trademark license, especially commercial redistribution. - -START: FULL LICENSE - -THE FULL PROJECT GUTENBERG LICENSE -PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU DISTRIBUTE OR USE THIS WORK - -To protect the Project Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting the free -distribution of electronic works, by using or distributing this work -(or any other work associated in any way with the phrase "Project -Gutenberg"), you agree to comply with all the terms of the Full -Project Gutenberg-tm License available with this file or online at -www.gutenberg.org/license. - -Section 1. General Terms of Use and Redistributing Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works - -1.A. By reading or using any part of this Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic work, you indicate that you have read, understand, agree to -and accept all the terms of this license and intellectual property -(trademark/copyright) agreement. If you do not agree to abide by all -the terms of this agreement, you must cease using and return or -destroy all copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in your -possession. If you paid a fee for obtaining a copy of or access to a -Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work and you do not agree to be bound -by the terms of this agreement, you may obtain a refund from the -person or entity to whom you paid the fee as set forth in paragraph -1.E.8. - -1.B. "Project Gutenberg" is a registered trademark. It may only be -used on or associated in any way with an electronic work by people who -agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement. There are a few -things that you can do with most Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works -even without complying with the full terms of this agreement. See -paragraph 1.C below. There are a lot of things you can do with Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works if you follow the terms of this -agreement and help preserve free future access to Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic works. See paragraph 1.E below. - -1.C. The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation ("the -Foundation" or PGLAF), owns a compilation copyright in the collection -of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works. Nearly all the individual -works in the collection are in the public domain in the United -States. If an individual work is unprotected by copyright law in the -United States and you are located in the United States, we do not -claim a right to prevent you from copying, distributing, performing, -displaying or creating derivative works based on the work as long as -all references to Project Gutenberg are removed. Of course, we hope -that you will support the Project Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting -free access to electronic works by freely sharing Project Gutenberg-tm -works in compliance with the terms of this agreement for keeping the -Project Gutenberg-tm name associated with the work. You can easily -comply with the terms of this agreement by keeping this work in the -same format with its attached full Project Gutenberg-tm License when -you share it without charge with others. - -1.D. The copyright laws of the place where you are located also govern -what you can do with this work. Copyright laws in most countries are -in a constant state of change. If you are outside the United States, -check the laws of your country in addition to the terms of this -agreement before downloading, copying, displaying, performing, -distributing or creating derivative works based on this work or any -other Project Gutenberg-tm work. The Foundation makes no -representations concerning the copyright status of any work in any -country outside the United States. - -1.E. Unless you have removed all references to Project Gutenberg: - -1.E.1. The following sentence, with active links to, or other -immediate access to, the full Project Gutenberg-tm License must appear -prominently whenever any copy of a Project Gutenberg-tm work (any work -on which the phrase "Project Gutenberg" appears, or with which the -phrase "Project Gutenberg" is associated) is accessed, displayed, -performed, viewed, copied or distributed: - - This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and - most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no - restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it - under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this - eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the - United States, you'll have to check the laws of the country where you - are located before using this ebook. - -1.E.2. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is -derived from texts not protected by U.S. copyright law (does not -contain a notice indicating that it is posted with permission of the -copyright holder), the work can be copied and distributed to anyone in -the United States without paying any fees or charges. If you are -redistributing or providing access to a work with the phrase "Project -Gutenberg" associated with or appearing on the work, you must comply -either with the requirements of paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 or -obtain permission for the use of the work and the Project Gutenberg-tm -trademark as set forth in paragraphs 1.E.8 or 1.E.9. - -1.E.3. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is posted -with the permission of the copyright holder, your use and distribution -must comply with both paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 and any -additional terms imposed by the copyright holder. Additional terms -will be linked to the Project Gutenberg-tm License for all works -posted with the permission of the copyright holder found at the -beginning of this work. - -1.E.4. Do not unlink or detach or remove the full Project Gutenberg-tm -License terms from this work, or any files containing a part of this -work or any other work associated with Project Gutenberg-tm. - -1.E.5. Do not copy, display, perform, distribute or redistribute this -electronic work, or any part of this electronic work, without -prominently displaying the sentence set forth in paragraph 1.E.1 with -active links or immediate access to the full terms of the Project -Gutenberg-tm License. - -1.E.6. You may convert to and distribute this work in any binary, -compressed, marked up, nonproprietary or proprietary form, including -any word processing or hypertext form. However, if you provide access -to or distribute copies of a Project Gutenberg-tm work in a format -other than "Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other format used in the official -version posted on the official Project Gutenberg-tm web site -(www.gutenberg.org), you must, at no additional cost, fee or expense -to the user, provide a copy, a means of exporting a copy, or a means -of obtaining a copy upon request, of the work in its original "Plain -Vanilla ASCII" or other form. Any alternate format must include the -full Project Gutenberg-tm License as specified in paragraph 1.E.1. - -1.E.7. Do not charge a fee for access to, viewing, displaying, -performing, copying or distributing any Project Gutenberg-tm works -unless you comply with paragraph 1.E.8 or 1.E.9. - -1.E.8. You may charge a reasonable fee for copies of or providing -access to or distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works -provided that - -* You pay a royalty fee of 20% of the gross profits you derive from - the use of Project Gutenberg-tm works calculated using the method - you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. The fee is owed - to the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark, but he has - agreed to donate royalties under this paragraph to the Project - Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation. Royalty payments must be paid - within 60 days following each date on which you prepare (or are - legally required to prepare) your periodic tax returns. Royalty - payments should be clearly marked as such and sent to the Project - Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation at the address specified in - Section 4, "Information about donations to the Project Gutenberg - Literary Archive Foundation." - -* You provide a full refund of any money paid by a user who notifies - you in writing (or by e-mail) within 30 days of receipt that s/he - does not agree to the terms of the full Project Gutenberg-tm - License. You must require such a user to return or destroy all - copies of the works possessed in a physical medium and discontinue - all use of and all access to other copies of Project Gutenberg-tm - works. - -* You provide, in accordance with paragraph 1.F.3, a full refund of - any money paid for a work or a replacement copy, if a defect in the - electronic work is discovered and reported to you within 90 days of - receipt of the work. - -* You comply with all other terms of this agreement for free - distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm works. - -1.E.9. If you wish to charge a fee or distribute a Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic work or group of works on different terms than -are set forth in this agreement, you must obtain permission in writing -from both the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation and The -Project Gutenberg Trademark LLC, the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm -trademark. Contact the Foundation as set forth in Section 3 below. - -1.F. - -1.F.1. Project Gutenberg volunteers and employees expend considerable -effort to identify, do copyright research on, transcribe and proofread -works not protected by U.S. copyright law in creating the Project -Gutenberg-tm collection. Despite these efforts, Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic works, and the medium on which they may be stored, may -contain "Defects," such as, but not limited to, incomplete, inaccurate -or corrupt data, transcription errors, a copyright or other -intellectual property infringement, a defective or damaged disk or -other medium, a computer virus, or computer codes that damage or -cannot be read by your equipment. - -1.F.2. LIMITED WARRANTY, DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES - Except for the "Right -of Replacement or Refund" described in paragraph 1.F.3, the Project -Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the owner of the Project -Gutenberg-tm trademark, and any other party distributing a Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic work under this agreement, disclaim all -liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal -fees. YOU AGREE THAT YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE, STRICT -LIABILITY, BREACH OF WARRANTY OR BREACH OF CONTRACT EXCEPT THOSE -PROVIDED IN PARAGRAPH 1.F.3. YOU AGREE THAT THE FOUNDATION, THE -TRADEMARK OWNER, AND ANY DISTRIBUTOR UNDER THIS AGREEMENT WILL NOT BE -LIABLE TO YOU FOR ACTUAL, DIRECT, INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR -INCIDENTAL DAMAGES EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH -DAMAGE. - -1.F.3. LIMITED RIGHT OF REPLACEMENT OR REFUND - If you discover a -defect in this electronic work within 90 days of receiving it, you can -receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending a -written explanation to the person you received the work from. If you -received the work on a physical medium, you must return the medium -with your written explanation. The person or entity that provided you -with the defective work may elect to provide a replacement copy in -lieu of a refund. If you received the work electronically, the person -or entity providing it to you may choose to give you a second -opportunity to receive the work electronically in lieu of a refund. If -the second copy is also defective, you may demand a refund in writing -without further opportunities to fix the problem. - -1.F.4. Except for the limited right of replacement or refund set forth -in paragraph 1.F.3, this work is provided to you 'AS-IS', WITH NO -OTHER WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT -LIMITED TO WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY OR FITNESS FOR ANY PURPOSE. - -1.F.5. Some states do not allow disclaimers of certain implied -warranties or the exclusion or limitation of certain types of -damages. If any disclaimer or limitation set forth in this agreement -violates the law of the state applicable to this agreement, the -agreement shall be interpreted to make the maximum disclaimer or -limitation permitted by the applicable state law. The invalidity or -unenforceability of any provision of this agreement shall not void the -remaining provisions. - -1.F.6. INDEMNITY - You agree to indemnify and hold the Foundation, the -trademark owner, any agent or employee of the Foundation, anyone -providing copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in -accordance with this agreement, and any volunteers associated with the -production, promotion and distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic works, harmless from all liability, costs and expenses, -including legal fees, that arise directly or indirectly from any of -the following which you do or cause to occur: (a) distribution of this -or any Project Gutenberg-tm work, (b) alteration, modification, or -additions or deletions to any Project Gutenberg-tm work, and (c) any -Defect you cause. - -Section 2. Information about the Mission of Project Gutenberg-tm - -Project Gutenberg-tm is synonymous with the free distribution of -electronic works in formats readable by the widest variety of -computers including obsolete, old, middle-aged and new computers. It -exists because of the efforts of hundreds of volunteers and donations -from people in all walks of life. - -Volunteers and financial support to provide volunteers with the -assistance they need are critical to reaching Project Gutenberg-tm's -goals and ensuring that the Project Gutenberg-tm collection will -remain freely available for generations to come. In 2001, the Project -Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation was created to provide a secure -and permanent future for Project Gutenberg-tm and future -generations. To learn more about the Project Gutenberg Literary -Archive Foundation and how your efforts and donations can help, see -Sections 3 and 4 and the Foundation information page at -www.gutenberg.org - - - -Section 3. Information about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation - -The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation is a non profit -501(c)(3) educational corporation organized under the laws of the -state of Mississippi and granted tax exempt status by the Internal -Revenue Service. The Foundation's EIN or federal tax identification -number is 64-6221541. Contributions to the Project Gutenberg Literary -Archive Foundation are tax deductible to the full extent permitted by -U.S. federal laws and your state's laws. - -The Foundation's principal office is in Fairbanks, Alaska, with the -mailing address: PO Box 750175, Fairbanks, AK 99775, but its -volunteers and employees are scattered throughout numerous -locations. Its business office is located at 809 North 1500 West, Salt -Lake City, UT 84116, (801) 596-1887. Email contact links and up to -date contact information can be found at the Foundation's web site and -official page at www.gutenberg.org/contact - -For additional contact information: - - Dr. Gregory B. Newby - Chief Executive and Director - gbnewby@pglaf.org - -Section 4. Information about Donations to the Project Gutenberg -Literary Archive Foundation - -Project Gutenberg-tm depends upon and cannot survive without wide -spread public support and donations to carry out its mission of -increasing the number of public domain and licensed works that can be -freely distributed in machine readable form accessible by the widest -array of equipment including outdated equipment. Many small donations -($1 to $5,000) are particularly important to maintaining tax exempt -status with the IRS. - -The Foundation is committed to complying with the laws regulating -charities and charitable donations in all 50 states of the United -States. Compliance requirements are not uniform and it takes a -considerable effort, much paperwork and many fees to meet and keep up -with these requirements. We do not solicit donations in locations -where we have not received written confirmation of compliance. To SEND -DONATIONS or determine the status of compliance for any particular -state visit www.gutenberg.org/donate - -While we cannot and do not solicit contributions from states where we -have not met the solicitation requirements, we know of no prohibition -against accepting unsolicited donations from donors in such states who -approach us with offers to donate. - -International donations are gratefully accepted, but we cannot make -any statements concerning tax treatment of donations received from -outside the United States. U.S. laws alone swamp our small staff. - -Please check the Project Gutenberg Web pages for current donation -methods and addresses. Donations are accepted in a number of other -ways including checks, online payments and credit card donations. To -donate, please visit: www.gutenberg.org/donate - -Section 5. General Information About Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works. - -Professor Michael S. Hart was the originator of the Project -Gutenberg-tm concept of a library of electronic works that could be -freely shared with anyone. For forty years, he produced and -distributed Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks with only a loose network of -volunteer support. - -Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks are often created from several printed -editions, all of which are confirmed as not protected by copyright in -the U.S. unless a copyright notice is included. Thus, we do not -necessarily keep eBooks in compliance with any particular paper -edition. - -Most people start at our Web site which has the main PG search -facility: www.gutenberg.org - -This Web site includes information about Project Gutenberg-tm, -including how to make donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary -Archive Foundation, how to help produce our new eBooks, and how to -subscribe to our email newsletter to hear about new eBooks. - - - -</pre> - -</body> -</html> diff --git a/old/63890-h/images/cover.jpg b/old/63890-h/images/cover.jpg Binary files differdeleted file mode 100644 index 7d413a8..0000000 --- a/old/63890-h/images/cover.jpg +++ /dev/null diff --git a/old/63890-h/images/illus.jpg b/old/63890-h/images/illus.jpg Binary files differdeleted file mode 100644 index 002b3a1..0000000 --- a/old/63890-h/images/illus.jpg +++ /dev/null diff --git a/old/63890.txt b/old/63890.txt deleted file mode 100644 index 8973d0f..0000000 --- a/old/63890.txt +++ /dev/null @@ -1,1224 +0,0 @@ -The Project Gutenberg EBook of A Planet Named Joe, by S. A. Lombino - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most -other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions -whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of -the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at -www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have -to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook. - -Title: A Planet Named Joe - -Author: S. A. Lombino - -Release Date: November 27, 2020 [EBook #63890] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: ASCII - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A PLANET NAMED JOE *** - - - - -Produced by Greg Weeks, Mary Meehan and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net - - - - - - - - - - A PLANET NAMED JOE - - By S. A. LOMBINO - - _There were more Joes on Venus than you could shake - a ray-gun at. Perhaps there was method in Colonel - Walsh's madness--murder-madness--when he ordered Major - Polk to scan the planet for a guy named Joe._ - - [Transcriber's Note: This etext was produced from Planet Stories -November 1952. Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that the - U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.] - - -Colonel Walsh had a great sense of humor. I hated his guts ever since -we went through the Academy together, but he had a great sense of humor. - -For example, he could have chosen a Second Looie for the job on Venus. -He might even have picked a Captain. But he liked me about as much as -I liked him, and so he decided the job was just right for a Major. At -least, that's what he told me. - -I stood at attention before his desk in the Patrol Station. We were -somewhere in Area Two on Earth, takeoff point for any operations in -Space II. The duty was fine, and I liked it a lot. Come to think of -it, the most I ever did was inspect a few defective tubes every now and -then. The rest was gravy, and Colonel Walsh wasn't going to let me get -by with gravy. - -"It will be a simple assignment, Major," he said to me, peering over -his fingers. He held them up in front of him like a cathedral. - -"Yes, sir," I said. - -"It will involve finding one man, a Venusian native." - -I wanted to say, "Then why the hell don't you send a green kid on -the job? Why me?" Instead, I nodded and watched him playing with his -fingers. - -"The man is a trader of sorts. Rather intelligent." He paused, then -added, "For a native, that is." - -I had never liked Walsh's attitude toward natives. I hadn't liked the -way he'd treated the natives on Mars ever since he'd taken over there. -Which brought to mind an important point. - -"I always figured Venus was under the jurisdiction of Space III, sir. I -thought our activities were confined to Mars." - -He folded his fingers like a deck of cards and dropped them on his desk -as if he were waiting for me to cut. - -"Mmmm," he said, "yes, that's true. But this is a special job. It so -happens this Venusian is the one man who can help us understand just -what's happening on Mars." - -I tried to picture a Venusian understanding Mars and I didn't get very -far. - -"He's had many dealings with the natives there," Walsh explained. "If -anyone can tell us the reasons for the revolt, he can." - -If Walsh really wanted to know the reasons for the revolt, I could give -them to him in one word: Walsh. I had to laugh at the way he called -it "revolt." It had been going on for six months now and we'd lost at -least a thousand men from Space II. Revolt. - -"And this man is on Venus now?" I asked for confirmation. I'd never -been to Venus, being in Space II ever since I'd left the Moon run. It -was just like Walsh to ship me off to a strange place. - -"Yes, Major," he said. "This man is on Venus." - -At the Academy he had called me Fred. That was before I'd reported -him for sleeping on Boiler Watch. He'd goofed off on a pile of uranium -that could've, and almost did, blow the barracks sky-high that night. -He still thought it was my fault, as if I'd done the wrong thing by -reporting him. And now, through the fouled-up machinery that exists in -any military organization, he outranked me. - -"And the man's name, sir?" - -"Joe." A tight smile played on his face. - -"Joe what?" I asked. - -"Just Joe." - -"Just Joe?" - -"Yes," Walsh said. "A native, you know. They rarely go in for more than -first names. But then, it should be simple to find a man with a name -like Joe. Among the natives, I mean." - -"I don't know, sir." - -"A relatively simple assignment," Walsh said. - -"Can you tell me anything else about this man? Physical appearance? -Personal habits? Anything?" - -Walsh seemed to consider this for a moment. "Well, physically he's like -any of the other Venusians, so I can't give you much help there. He -does have a peculiar habit, though." - -"What's that?" - -"He has an affinity for Terran cigarettes." - -I sighed. "Well, it's not very much to go on." - -"You'll find him," Walsh said, grinning. "I'm sure of it." - - * * * * * - -The trip to Venus came off without a hitch. I did a lot of thinking on -that trip. I thought about Mars and the revolt there. And I thought -about Colonel Leonard Walsh and how he was supposed to be quelling that -revolt. Ever since Walsh had taken command, ever since he'd started -pushing the natives around, there'd been trouble. It was almost as if -the whole damned planet had blown up in our faces the moment he took -over. Swell guy, Walsh. - -Venus was hotter than I'd expected it to be. Much too hot for the tunic -I was wearing. It smelled, too. A funny smell I couldn't place. Like -a mixture of old shoe and after-shave. There were plants everywhere -I looked. Big plants and small ones, some blooming with flowers I'd -never seen before, and some as bare as cactus. - -I recognized a blue figure as one of the natives the pilot had told me -about. He was tall, looking almost human except that everything about -him was elongated. His features, his muscles, everything seemed to have -been stretched like a rubber band. I kept expecting him to pop back to -normal. Instead, he flashed a double row of brilliant teeth at me. - -I wondered if he spoke English. "Hey, boy," I called. - -He ambled over with long-legged strides that closed the distance -between us in seconds. - -"Call me Joe," he said. - -I dropped my bags and stared at him. Maybe this _was_ going to be a -simple assignment after all. "I sure am glad to see you, Joe," I said. - -"Same here, Toots," he answered. - -"The guys back in Space II are searching high and low for you," I told -him. - -"You've got the wrong number," he said, and I was a little surprised at -his use of Terran idiom. - -"You are Joe, aren't you? Joe the trader?" - -"I'm Joe, all right," he said. "Only thing I ever traded, though, was a -pocketknife. Got a set of keys for it." - -"Oh," I said, my voice conveying my disappointment. I sighed and began -wondering just how I should go about contacting the Joe I was looking -for. My orders said I was to report to Captain Bransten immediately -upon arrival. I figured the hell with Captain Bransten. I outranked him -anyway, and there wasn't much he could do if I decided to stop for a -drink first. - -"Where's the Officer's Club?" I asked the Venusian. - -"Are you buying information or are you just curious?" - -"Can you take me there?" I asked. - -"Sure thing, Toots." He picked up my bags and started walking up a -heavily overgrown path. We'd probably walked for about ten minutes when -he dropped my bags and said, "There it is." - -The Officer's Club was a plasteel hut with window shields that -protected it from the heat of the sun. It didn't look too comfortable -but I really wanted that drink. I reached into my tunic and slipped -the native thirty solars. - -He stared at the credits curiously and then shrugged his shoulders. "Oh -well, you're new here. We'll let it go." - -He took off then, while I stared after him, wondering just what he'd -meant. Had I tipped him too little? - -I shrugged and looked over at the Officer's Club. From the outside it -looked as hot as hell. - -On the inside it was about two degrees short of that mark. I began to -curse Walsh for taking me away from my nice soft job in Space II. - -There wasn't much inside the club. A few tables and chairs, a dart game -and a bar. Behind the bar a tall Venusian lounged. - -I walked over and asked, "What are you serving, pal?" - -"Call me Joe," he answered. - -He caught me off balance. "What?" - -"Joe," he said again. - -A faint glimmer of understanding began to penetrate my thick skull. -"You wouldn't happen to be Joe the trader? The guy who knows all about -Mars, would you?" - -"I never left home," he said simply. "What are you drinking?" - -That rat! That dirty, filthy, stinking, unprincipled.... - -_But then, it should be simple to find a man with a name like_ Joe. -_Among the natives, I mean._ - -Sure. Oh sure. Real simple. Walsh was about the lowest, most -contemptible.... - -"What are you drinking, pal?" the Venusian asked again. - -"Skip it," I said. "How do I get to the captain's shack?" - -"Follow your nose, pal. Can't miss it." - -I started to pick up my bag as another Venusian entered. He waved at -the bartender. - -"Hello, Joe," he said. "How's it going?" - -"Not so hot, Joe," the bartender replied. - -I listened in fascination. Joe, Joe, Joe. So this was Walsh's idea of a -great gag. Very funny. Very.... - -"You Major Polk, sweetheart?" the Venusian who'd just come in asked. - -"Yes," I said, still thinking of Colonel Walsh. - -"You better get your butt over to the captain's shack," he said. "He's -about ready to post you as overdue." - -"Sure," I said wearily. "Will you take my bags, please?" - -"Roger," he answered. He picked up the bags and nodded at the bar. - -"So long, Joe," he said to the bartender. - -"See you, Joe," the bartender called back. - - * * * * * - -Captain Bransten was a mousey, unimpressive sort of man. He was wearing -a tropical tunic, but he still resembled a wilted lily more than he did -an officer. - -"Have a seat, Major," he offered. He reached for a cigarette box on the -desk and extended it to me. He coughed in embarrassment when he saw it -was empty. Quickly, he pressed a button on his desk and the door popped -open. A tall, blue Venusian stepped lithely into the room. - -"Sir?" the Venusian asked. - -"We're out of cigarettes, Joe," the Captain said. "Will you get us -some, please?" - -"Sure thing," the Venusian answered. He smiled broadly and closed the -door behind him. - -_Another Joe_, I thought. _Another damned Joe._ - -"They steal them," Captain Bransten said abruptly. - -"Steal what?" I asked. - -"Cigarettes. I sometimes think the cigarette is one of the few things -they like about Terran culture." - -So Walsh had taken care of that angle too. _He does have a peculiar -habit, though. He has an affinity for Terran cigarettes._ Cigarettes -was the tip I should have given; not solars. - -"All right," I said, "suppose we start at the beginning." - -Captain Bransten opened his eyes wide. "Sir?" he asked. - -"What's with all this Joe business? It may be a very original name but -I think its popularity here is a little outstanding." - -Captain Bransten began to chuckle softly. I personally didn't think it -was so funny. I tossed him my withering Superior Officer's gaze and -waited for his explanation. - -"I hadn't realized this was your first time on Venus," he said. - -"Is there a local hero named Joe?" I asked. - -"No, no, nothing like that," he assured me. "It's a simple culture, you -know. Not nearly as developed as Mars." - -"I can see that," I said bitingly. - -"And the natives are only now becoming acquainted with Terran culture. -Lots of enlisted men, you know." - -I began to get the idea. And I began to appreciate Walsh's doubtful -ancestry more keenly. - -"It's impossible to tell exactly where it all started, of course," -Bransten was saying. - -I was beginning to get angry. Very angry. I was thinking of Walsh -sitting back in a nice cozy foam chair back on Earth. - -"Get to the point, Captain!" I barked. - -"Easy, sir," Bransten said, turning pale. I could see that the Captain -wasn't used to entertaining Majors. "The enlisted men. You know how -they are. They'll ask a native to do something and they'll call him -Joe. 'Hey, Joe, give me a hand with this.' Or 'Listen, Joe, how'd you -like to earn some cigarettes?' Do you follow?" - -"I follow, all right," I said bitterly. - -"Well," Bransten went on, "that sort of thing mushrooms. The natives -are a simple, almost childish people. It appealed to them--the Joe -business, I mean. Now they're all Joe. They like it. That and the -cigarettes." - -He cleared his throat and looked at me apologetically as if he were -personally responsible for Venusian culture. In fact, he looked as if -he were responsible for having put Venus in the heavens in the first -place. - -"Do you understand, Major? Just a case of extended idiom, that's all." - -Just a case of extended _idiot_, I thought. An idiot on a wild goose -chase a hell of a long way from home. - -"I understand perfectly," I snapped. "Where are my quarters?" - -Bransten asked a Venusian named Joe to show me my quarters, reminding -me that chow was at thirteen hundred. As I was leaving, the first -Venusian came back with the cigarettes Bransten had ordered. - -I could tell by the look on his face that he probably had half a carton -stuffed into his pockets. I shrugged and went to change into a tropical -tunic. - -I called Earth right after chow. The Captain assured me that this sort -of thing was definitely against regulations, but he submitted when I -twinkled my little gold leaf under his nose. - -Walsh's face appeared on the screen. He was smiling, looking like a fat -pussy cat. - -"What is it, Major?" he asked. - -"This man Joe," I said. "Can you give me any more on him?" - -Walsh's grin grew wider. "Why, Major," he said, "you're not having any -difficulties, are you?" - -"None at all," I snapped back. "I just thought I'd be able to find him -a lot sooner if...." - -"Take your time, Major," Walsh beamed. "There's no rush at all." - -"I thought...." - -"I'm sure you can do the job," Walsh cut in. "I wouldn't have sent you -otherwise." - -Hell, I was through kidding around. "Look...." - -"He's somewhere in the jungle, you know," Walsh said. - -I wanted to ram my fist into the screen, right smack up against those -big white teeth. Instead, I cut off the transmission and watched the -surprised look on his face as his screen went blank millions of miles -away. - -He blinked at the screen, trying to realize I'd deliberately hung up on -him. - -"Polk!" he shouted, "can you hear me?" - -I smiled, saw the twisted hatred on his features, and then the screen -on my end went blank, too. - -_He's somewhere in the jungle, you know._ - -I thanked Captain Bransten for his hospitality and went back to my -quarters. - -As I saw it, there were two courses for me to follow. - -One: I could say the hell with Walsh and Venus. That would mean hopping -the next ship back to Earth. - -It would also mean disobeying the direct order of a superior officer. -It might mean demotion, and it might mean getting bounced out of the -Service altogether. - -Two: I could assume there really was a guy name Joe somewhere in that -jungle, a Joe separate and apart from the other Joes on this planet, a -trader Joe who knew the Martians well. I could always admit failure, of -course, and return empty handed. Mission not accomplished. Or, I might -really find a guy who was trader Joe. - -I made my decision quickly. I wanted to stay in the Service, and -besides Walsh may have been on the level for the first time in his -life. Maybe there was a Joe here who could help us on Mars. If there -was I'd try to find him. It was still a hell of a trick though. - -I cursed Walsh again and pushed the buzzer near my bed. - -A tall Venusian stepped into the room. - -"Joe?" I asked, just to be sure. - -"Who else, boss?" he answered. - -"I'm trying to locate someone," I said. "I'll need a guide to take me -into the jungle. Can you get me one?" - -"It'll cost you, boss," the Venusian said. - -"How much?" - -"Two cartons of cigarettes at least." - -"Who's the guide?" I asked. - -"How's the price sound?" - -"Fine, fine," I said impatiently. And the Captain had said they were -almost a childish people! - -"His name is Joe," the Venusian told me. "Best damn guide on the -planet. Take you anywhere you want to go, do anything you want to do. -Courageous. Doesn't know the meaning of fear. I've known him to...." - -"Skip it," I said, cutting the promotion short. "Tell him to show up -around fifteen hundred with a complete list of what we'll need." - -The Venusian started to leave. - -"And Joe," I said, stopping him at the door, "I hope you're not -overlooking your commission on the deal." - -His face broke into a wide grin. "No danger of that, boss," he said. - -When he was gone I began figuring out a plan of action. Obviously, I'd -just have to traipse through the jungle looking for a guy named Joe on -a planet where everyone was named Joe. Everybody, at least, but the -Captain, the small garrison attached to the Station, and me. - - * * * * * - -I began wondering why Walsh had gone to so much trouble to get rid of -me. The job, as I saw it, would take a hell of a long time. It seemed -like a silly thing to do, just to get even with a guy for something -that had happened years ago. He surely must have realized that I'd be -back again, sooner or later. Maybe he had another little junket all set -for me. - -Or maybe he didn't expect me to come back. - -The thought hadn't occurred to me before this, and I began to consider -it seriously. Walsh was no good, rotten clear through. He was failing -at the job of keeping Mars in hand, and he probably realized that a -few more mistakes on his part would mean the end of his career with -Space II. I chuckled as I thought of him isolated in some God-forsaken -place like Space V or Space VII. This probably bothered him a lot, too. -But what probably bothered him more was the fact that I was next in -command. If he were transferred, I'd be in charge of Space II, and I -could understand how much that would appeal to Walsh. - -I tried to figure the thing out sensibly, tried to weigh his good -points against his bad. But it all came back to the same thing. A -guy who would deliberately go to sleep on Boiler Watch with a ton of -uranium ready to blast a barracks to smithereens if it wasn't watched, -would deliberately do just about anything. - -Sending me off on a wild goose chase after a character named Joe may -have been a gag. But it may have been something a little grimmer than a -gag, and I made up my mind to be extremely careful from here on in. - -The guide arrived at fifteen hundred on the dot. He was tall, -elongated, looked almost like all the other Venusians I'd seen so far. - -"I understand you need a Grade A guide, sir," he said. - -"Are you familiar with the jungle?" I asked him. - -"Born and raised there, sir. Know it like the back of my hand." - -"Has Joe told you what the payment will be?" - -"Yes, sir. A carton and a half of cigarettes." - -I thought about Joe deducting his commission and smiled. - -"When can we leave?" - -"Right away, sir. We won't need much really. I've made a list of -supplies and I can get them in less than an hour. I suggest you wear -light clothing, boots, and a hat." - -"Will I need a weapon?" - -He looked at me, his eyes faintly amused. "Why, what for, sir?" - -"Never mind," I said. "What's your name, by the way?" - -He lifted his eyebrows, and his eyes widened in his narrow face. He was -definitely surprised. - -"Joe," he said. "Didn't you know?" - - * * * * * - -When we'd been out for a while I discovered why Joe had suggested the -boots and the hat. The undergrowth was often sharp and jagged and it -would have sliced my legs to ribbons were they not protected by the -high boots. The hat kept the strong sun off my head. - -Joe was an excellent guide and a pleasant companion. He seemed to be -enjoying a great romp, seemed to love the jungle and take a secret -pleasure in the work he was doing. There were times when I couldn't -see three feet ahead of me. He'd stand stock still for a few minutes, -his head barely moving, his eyes darting from one plant to another. -Then he'd say, "This way," and take off into what looked like more -impenetrable jungle invariably to find a little path leading directly -to another village. - -Each village was the same. The natives would come running out of their -huts, tall and blue, shouting, "Cigarettes, Joe? Cigarettes?" It took -me a while to realize they were addressing me and not my guide. - -Everybody was Joe. It was one beautiful, happy, joyous round of -stinking, hot jungle. And I wasn't getting any nearer my man. Nor had -I any idea how I was supposed to find him. I began to feel pretty low -about the whole affair. - -Joe, on the other hand, enjoyed every moment of the trip. In each -village he greeted the natives cheerfully, told them stories, swapped -gossip and jokes. And when it was time to leave, he would say goodbye -to all his friends and we would plunge into the twisted foliage again. - -His spirits were always high and he never failed to say the right thing -that would give a momentary lift to my own depressed state of mind. He -would talk for hours on end as we hacked our way through the jungle. - -"I like Venus," he said once. "I would never leave it." - -"Have you ever been to Earth?" I asked. - -"No," Joe replied. "I like Terrans too, you understand. They are good -for Venus. And they are fun." - -"Fun?" I asked, thinking of a particular species of Terran: species -Leonard Walsh. - -"Yes, yes," he said wholeheartedly. "They joke and they laugh and ... -well, you know." - -"I suppose so," I admitted. - -Joe smiled secretly, and we pushed on. I began to find, more and more, -that I had started to talk freely to Joe. In the beginning he had been -just my guide. There had been the strained relationship of employer and -employee. But as the days lengthened into weeks, the formal atmosphere -began to crumble. I found myself telling him all about Earth, about -the people there, about my decision to attend the Academy, the rigid -tests, the grind, even the Moon run. Joe was a good listener, nodding -sympathetically, finding experiences in his own life to parallel my own. - -And as our relationship progressed from a casual one to a definitely -friendly one, Joe seemed more enthusiastic than ever to keep up our -grinding pace to find what we were looking for. - -Once we stopped in a clearing to rest. Joe lounged on the matted -greenery, his long body stretched out in front of him, the knife -gleaming in his belt. I'd seen him slash his way through thick, tangled -vines with that knife, his long, muscular arms powerfully slicing -through them like strips of silk. - -"How far are we from the Station?" I asked. - -"Three or four Earth weeks," he replied. - -I sighed wearily. "Where do we go from here?" - -"There are more villages," he said. - -"We'll never find him." - -"Possibly," Joe mused, the smile creeping over his face again. - -"A wild goose chase. A fool's errand." - -"We'd better get started," Joe said simply. - -I got to my feet and we started the march again. Joe was still fresh, a -brilliant contrast to me, weary and dejected. Somehow, I had the same -feeling I'd had a long time ago on my sixteenth birthday. One of my -friends had taken me all over the city, finally dropping me off at my -own house where the whole gang was gathered for a surprise party. Joe -reminded me of that friend. - -"There's a village ahead," he said, and the grin on his face was large -now, his eyes shining. - - * * * * * - -Something was missing here. Natives. There were no natives rushing out -to greet us. No cries of "Cigarettes? Cigarettes?" I caught up with Joe. - -"What's the story?" I whispered. - -He shrugged knowingly and continued walking. - -And then I saw the ship, nose pointing into space, catching the rays of -the sun like a great silver bullet. - -"What...?" I started. - -"It's all right," Joe said, smiling. - -The ship looked vaguely familiar. I noticed the crest of Space II near -the nose, and a lot of things became clear then. I also saw Walsh -standing near one of the huts, a stun gun in his hand. - -"Hello, Major," he called, almost cheerfully. The gun didn't look -cheerful, though. It was pointed at my head. - -"Fancy meeting you here, Colonel," I said, trying to match his -joviality. Somehow it didn't quite come off. - -Joe was walking beside me, waving at the colonel, beaming all over with -happiness. - -"I see you found your man," Walsh said. - -I turned rapidly. Joe nodded and kept grinning, a grin that told me he -was getting a big kick out of all this. Like a kid playing a game. - -I faced Walsh again. "Okay, what's it all about, pal?" - -"Colonel," Walsh corrected me. "You mustn't forget to say Colonel, -_Major_." He emphasized my rank, and he said it with a sort of ruthless -finality. - -I waited. I could see he was just busting to tell me how clever he'd -been. Besides, there wasn't much I could do but wait. Not with Walsh -pointing the stun gun at my middle. - -"We've come a long way since the Academy, haven't we, Major?" - -"If you mean in miles," I said, looking around at the plants, "we sure -have." - -Walsh grinned a little. "Always the wit," he said drily. And then the -smile faded from his lips and his eyes took on a hard lustre. "I'm -going to kill you, you know." He said it as if he were saying, "I think -it'll rain tomorrow." - -Joe almost clapped his hands together with glee. He was really enjoying -this. Another of those funny Terran games. - -"You gave me a powerful handicap to overcome," Walsh said. "I suppose I -should thank you, really." - -"You're welcome," I said. - -"It wasn't easy living down the disgrace you caused me." - -"It was your own damn fault," I said. "You knew what you were doing -when you decided to cork off." - -Beside me, Joe chuckled a little, enjoying the game immensely. - -"You didn't have to report me," Walsh said. - -"No? Maybe I should have forgotten all about it? Maybe I should have -nudged you and served you orange juice? So you could do it again -sometime and maybe blow up the whole damn Academy!" - -Walsh was silent for a long time. When he spoke his voice was barely -audible. The heat was oppressive, as if it were concentrated on this -little spot in the jungle, focusing all its penetration on a small, -unimportant drama. - -I could hear Joe breathing beside me. - -"I'm on my way out," Walsh rasped. "Finished, do you understand?" - -"Good," I said. And I meant it. - -"This Mars thing. A terrible fix. Terrible." - -Beside me, a slight frown crossed Joe's face. Apparently he couldn't -understand the seriousness of our voices. What had happened to the -game, the fun? - -"You brought the Mars business on yourself," I told Walsh. "There was -never any trouble before you took command." - -"The natives," he practically shouted. "They ... they...." - -Joe caught his breath sharply, and I wondered what Walsh was going to -say about the natives. Apparently he'd realized that Joe was a native. -Or maybe Joe's knife had something to do with it. - -"What about the natives?" I asked. - -"Nothing," Walsh said. "Nothing." He was silent for a while. - -"A man of my calibre," he said then, his face grim. "Dealing with -savages." He caught himself again and threw a hasty glance at Joe. -The perplexed frown had grown heavier on Joe's face. He looked at the -colonel in puzzlement. - - * * * * * - -Walsh turned from Joe and raised the stun gun. I wondered if he had yet -realized that Joe was one of a million Joes scattered all over this -planet, that Joe was all the natives on Venus. That Joe was all the -natives everywhere throughout the galaxy. I looked at Walsh's eyes. He -was a sick man, alone with his thoughts in the middle of a stinking -jungle. - -"I'm on my way out, Major," he said, "but you won't get a chance to -succeed where I've failed. No. Oh no. I'll see to that." - -"And you had to come all the way to Venus to do it?" - -"Don't joke," Walsh snapped. "Don't joke, Major. It's not funny. It's -not funny at all." - -"It's pretty sad, I'd say." - -"You can't afford to say anything," Walsh remarked drily. "You're going -to be dead in a very few minutes." - -Joe's eyes widened, and I saw indecision cross his features as he tried -to understand what had happened to the game. - -"What'll they say back on Earth when they hear about this?" I asked. - -"When will they hear about it? Four, five months from now? By then, my -little trip will have been forgotten. Besides, I'm here on a routine -check. Everyone knows that." - -"A routine check on Venus? Mars is your territory." - -"One of my men is up here," Walsh said. "That gives me temporary -jurisdiction. At least enough to visit the planet and see how -conditions are. Anyway, I'll be home long before Joe here carries your -body in." - -Joe shook his head imperceptibly but Walsh didn't catch it. - -"A casualty in the jungle," Walsh continued. "The native will return -to the Station and explain the accident. I'll be back on Earth long -before he reaches there." - -"Sure," I said, "nice and simple. You kill me and Joe delivers the news -and takes the rap. Good old sucker Joe." - -"That's about enough out of you," Walsh said. - -"Go ahead, Colonel," I shouted. "Pull the trigger. Then run off and -leave Joe to...." - -"I said that's enough out of you!" Walsh shouted. - -I turned to face Joe. His mouth was drawn across his face in a tight -emotionless line. He stepped in front of me and stared at Walsh. - -"Get out of the way," Walsh commanded. - -Joe shook his head slowly. "This is not what you told me. A friend, you -said. A surprise. You said you wanted to...." - -"Get out of the way, you damned sav...." - -With one swift movement Joe leaped forward. The knife gleamed in his -hand and there was momentary panic on Walsh's face. - -The stun gun snapped up. It crackled once in the Venusian jungle, its -blast blinding me for a moment. It shuddered through Joe's left arm and -paralyzed it momentarily. - -But the hand with the knife was hacking away at Walsh's throat, the -blood dripping down over the silver planet on the collar of his tunic. - -I made my report to Bransten. - -I told him the body of Colonel Leonard Walsh had been discovered in the -jungle. He was barely alive when he'd been found. I'd administered aid -but his knife wounds had proved to be fatal. He died shortly after I -found him. - -"Awful," the captain said, "awful." - -I nodded sympathetically. - -"Did he say anything? Did he give you any idea? I mean, did he say who -did it?" - -"Yes," I said. "He told me who murdered him." - -We were standing near the platform of my ship, waiting for them to -prepare for blastoff. - -"Well who, Major?" he asked. "Who did he say did it?" - -"Joe," I explained. "A native named Joe." - - - - - -End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of A Planet Named Joe, by S. A. Lombino - -*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A PLANET NAMED JOE *** - -***** This file should be named 63890.txt or 63890.zip ***** -This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: - http://www.gutenberg.org/6/3/8/9/63890/ - -Produced by Greg Weeks, Mary Meehan and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will -be renamed. - -Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright -law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, -so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United -States without permission and without paying copyright -royalties. Special rules, set forth in the General Terms of Use part -of this license, apply to copying and distributing Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works to protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm -concept and trademark. Project Gutenberg is a registered trademark, -and may not be used if you charge for the eBooks, unless you receive -specific permission. If you do not charge anything for copies of this -eBook, complying with the rules is very easy. You may use this eBook -for nearly any purpose such as creation of derivative works, reports, -performances and research. They may be modified and printed and given -away--you may do practically ANYTHING in the United States with eBooks -not protected by U.S. copyright law. Redistribution is subject to the -trademark license, especially commercial redistribution. - -START: FULL LICENSE - -THE FULL PROJECT GUTENBERG LICENSE -PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU DISTRIBUTE OR USE THIS WORK - -To protect the Project Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting the free -distribution of electronic works, by using or distributing this work -(or any other work associated in any way with the phrase "Project -Gutenberg"), you agree to comply with all the terms of the Full -Project Gutenberg-tm License available with this file or online at -www.gutenberg.org/license. - -Section 1. General Terms of Use and Redistributing Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works - -1.A. By reading or using any part of this Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic work, you indicate that you have read, understand, agree to -and accept all the terms of this license and intellectual property -(trademark/copyright) agreement. If you do not agree to abide by all -the terms of this agreement, you must cease using and return or -destroy all copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in your -possession. If you paid a fee for obtaining a copy of or access to a -Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work and you do not agree to be bound -by the terms of this agreement, you may obtain a refund from the -person or entity to whom you paid the fee as set forth in paragraph -1.E.8. - -1.B. "Project Gutenberg" is a registered trademark. It may only be -used on or associated in any way with an electronic work by people who -agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement. There are a few -things that you can do with most Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works -even without complying with the full terms of this agreement. See -paragraph 1.C below. There are a lot of things you can do with Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works if you follow the terms of this -agreement and help preserve free future access to Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic works. See paragraph 1.E below. - -1.C. The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation ("the -Foundation" or PGLAF), owns a compilation copyright in the collection -of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works. Nearly all the individual -works in the collection are in the public domain in the United -States. If an individual work is unprotected by copyright law in the -United States and you are located in the United States, we do not -claim a right to prevent you from copying, distributing, performing, -displaying or creating derivative works based on the work as long as -all references to Project Gutenberg are removed. Of course, we hope -that you will support the Project Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting -free access to electronic works by freely sharing Project Gutenberg-tm -works in compliance with the terms of this agreement for keeping the -Project Gutenberg-tm name associated with the work. You can easily -comply with the terms of this agreement by keeping this work in the -same format with its attached full Project Gutenberg-tm License when -you share it without charge with others. - -1.D. The copyright laws of the place where you are located also govern -what you can do with this work. Copyright laws in most countries are -in a constant state of change. If you are outside the United States, -check the laws of your country in addition to the terms of this -agreement before downloading, copying, displaying, performing, -distributing or creating derivative works based on this work or any -other Project Gutenberg-tm work. The Foundation makes no -representations concerning the copyright status of any work in any -country outside the United States. - -1.E. Unless you have removed all references to Project Gutenberg: - -1.E.1. The following sentence, with active links to, or other -immediate access to, the full Project Gutenberg-tm License must appear -prominently whenever any copy of a Project Gutenberg-tm work (any work -on which the phrase "Project Gutenberg" appears, or with which the -phrase "Project Gutenberg" is associated) is accessed, displayed, -performed, viewed, copied or distributed: - - This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and - most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no - restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it - under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this - eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the - United States, you'll have to check the laws of the country where you - are located before using this ebook. - -1.E.2. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is -derived from texts not protected by U.S. copyright law (does not -contain a notice indicating that it is posted with permission of the -copyright holder), the work can be copied and distributed to anyone in -the United States without paying any fees or charges. If you are -redistributing or providing access to a work with the phrase "Project -Gutenberg" associated with or appearing on the work, you must comply -either with the requirements of paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 or -obtain permission for the use of the work and the Project Gutenberg-tm -trademark as set forth in paragraphs 1.E.8 or 1.E.9. - -1.E.3. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is posted -with the permission of the copyright holder, your use and distribution -must comply with both paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 and any -additional terms imposed by the copyright holder. Additional terms -will be linked to the Project Gutenberg-tm License for all works -posted with the permission of the copyright holder found at the -beginning of this work. - -1.E.4. Do not unlink or detach or remove the full Project Gutenberg-tm -License terms from this work, or any files containing a part of this -work or any other work associated with Project Gutenberg-tm. - -1.E.5. Do not copy, display, perform, distribute or redistribute this -electronic work, or any part of this electronic work, without -prominently displaying the sentence set forth in paragraph 1.E.1 with -active links or immediate access to the full terms of the Project -Gutenberg-tm License. - -1.E.6. You may convert to and distribute this work in any binary, -compressed, marked up, nonproprietary or proprietary form, including -any word processing or hypertext form. However, if you provide access -to or distribute copies of a Project Gutenberg-tm work in a format -other than "Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other format used in the official -version posted on the official Project Gutenberg-tm web site -(www.gutenberg.org), you must, at no additional cost, fee or expense -to the user, provide a copy, a means of exporting a copy, or a means -of obtaining a copy upon request, of the work in its original "Plain -Vanilla ASCII" or other form. Any alternate format must include the -full Project Gutenberg-tm License as specified in paragraph 1.E.1. - -1.E.7. Do not charge a fee for access to, viewing, displaying, -performing, copying or distributing any Project Gutenberg-tm works -unless you comply with paragraph 1.E.8 or 1.E.9. - -1.E.8. You may charge a reasonable fee for copies of or providing -access to or distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works -provided that - -* You pay a royalty fee of 20% of the gross profits you derive from - the use of Project Gutenberg-tm works calculated using the method - you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. The fee is owed - to the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark, but he has - agreed to donate royalties under this paragraph to the Project - Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation. Royalty payments must be paid - within 60 days following each date on which you prepare (or are - legally required to prepare) your periodic tax returns. Royalty - payments should be clearly marked as such and sent to the Project - Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation at the address specified in - Section 4, "Information about donations to the Project Gutenberg - Literary Archive Foundation." - -* You provide a full refund of any money paid by a user who notifies - you in writing (or by e-mail) within 30 days of receipt that s/he - does not agree to the terms of the full Project Gutenberg-tm - License. You must require such a user to return or destroy all - copies of the works possessed in a physical medium and discontinue - all use of and all access to other copies of Project Gutenberg-tm - works. - -* You provide, in accordance with paragraph 1.F.3, a full refund of - any money paid for a work or a replacement copy, if a defect in the - electronic work is discovered and reported to you within 90 days of - receipt of the work. - -* You comply with all other terms of this agreement for free - distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm works. - -1.E.9. If you wish to charge a fee or distribute a Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic work or group of works on different terms than -are set forth in this agreement, you must obtain permission in writing -from both the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation and The -Project Gutenberg Trademark LLC, the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm -trademark. Contact the Foundation as set forth in Section 3 below. - -1.F. - -1.F.1. Project Gutenberg volunteers and employees expend considerable -effort to identify, do copyright research on, transcribe and proofread -works not protected by U.S. copyright law in creating the Project -Gutenberg-tm collection. Despite these efforts, Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic works, and the medium on which they may be stored, may -contain "Defects," such as, but not limited to, incomplete, inaccurate -or corrupt data, transcription errors, a copyright or other -intellectual property infringement, a defective or damaged disk or -other medium, a computer virus, or computer codes that damage or -cannot be read by your equipment. - -1.F.2. LIMITED WARRANTY, DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES - Except for the "Right -of Replacement or Refund" described in paragraph 1.F.3, the Project -Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the owner of the Project -Gutenberg-tm trademark, and any other party distributing a Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic work under this agreement, disclaim all -liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal -fees. YOU AGREE THAT YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE, STRICT -LIABILITY, BREACH OF WARRANTY OR BREACH OF CONTRACT EXCEPT THOSE -PROVIDED IN PARAGRAPH 1.F.3. YOU AGREE THAT THE FOUNDATION, THE -TRADEMARK OWNER, AND ANY DISTRIBUTOR UNDER THIS AGREEMENT WILL NOT BE -LIABLE TO YOU FOR ACTUAL, DIRECT, INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR -INCIDENTAL DAMAGES EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH -DAMAGE. - -1.F.3. LIMITED RIGHT OF REPLACEMENT OR REFUND - If you discover a -defect in this electronic work within 90 days of receiving it, you can -receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending a -written explanation to the person you received the work from. If you -received the work on a physical medium, you must return the medium -with your written explanation. The person or entity that provided you -with the defective work may elect to provide a replacement copy in -lieu of a refund. If you received the work electronically, the person -or entity providing it to you may choose to give you a second -opportunity to receive the work electronically in lieu of a refund. If -the second copy is also defective, you may demand a refund in writing -without further opportunities to fix the problem. - -1.F.4. Except for the limited right of replacement or refund set forth -in paragraph 1.F.3, this work is provided to you 'AS-IS', WITH NO -OTHER WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT -LIMITED TO WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY OR FITNESS FOR ANY PURPOSE. - -1.F.5. Some states do not allow disclaimers of certain implied -warranties or the exclusion or limitation of certain types of -damages. If any disclaimer or limitation set forth in this agreement -violates the law of the state applicable to this agreement, the -agreement shall be interpreted to make the maximum disclaimer or -limitation permitted by the applicable state law. The invalidity or -unenforceability of any provision of this agreement shall not void the -remaining provisions. - -1.F.6. INDEMNITY - You agree to indemnify and hold the Foundation, the -trademark owner, any agent or employee of the Foundation, anyone -providing copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in -accordance with this agreement, and any volunteers associated with the -production, promotion and distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic works, harmless from all liability, costs and expenses, -including legal fees, that arise directly or indirectly from any of -the following which you do or cause to occur: (a) distribution of this -or any Project Gutenberg-tm work, (b) alteration, modification, or -additions or deletions to any Project Gutenberg-tm work, and (c) any -Defect you cause. - -Section 2. Information about the Mission of Project Gutenberg-tm - -Project Gutenberg-tm is synonymous with the free distribution of -electronic works in formats readable by the widest variety of -computers including obsolete, old, middle-aged and new computers. It -exists because of the efforts of hundreds of volunteers and donations -from people in all walks of life. - -Volunteers and financial support to provide volunteers with the -assistance they need are critical to reaching Project Gutenberg-tm's -goals and ensuring that the Project Gutenberg-tm collection will -remain freely available for generations to come. In 2001, the Project -Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation was created to provide a secure -and permanent future for Project Gutenberg-tm and future -generations. To learn more about the Project Gutenberg Literary -Archive Foundation and how your efforts and donations can help, see -Sections 3 and 4 and the Foundation information page at -www.gutenberg.org - - - -Section 3. Information about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation - -The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation is a non profit -501(c)(3) educational corporation organized under the laws of the -state of Mississippi and granted tax exempt status by the Internal -Revenue Service. The Foundation's EIN or federal tax identification -number is 64-6221541. Contributions to the Project Gutenberg Literary -Archive Foundation are tax deductible to the full extent permitted by -U.S. federal laws and your state's laws. - -The Foundation's principal office is in Fairbanks, Alaska, with the -mailing address: PO Box 750175, Fairbanks, AK 99775, but its -volunteers and employees are scattered throughout numerous -locations. Its business office is located at 809 North 1500 West, Salt -Lake City, UT 84116, (801) 596-1887. Email contact links and up to -date contact information can be found at the Foundation's web site and -official page at www.gutenberg.org/contact - -For additional contact information: - - Dr. Gregory B. Newby - Chief Executive and Director - gbnewby@pglaf.org - -Section 4. Information about Donations to the Project Gutenberg -Literary Archive Foundation - -Project Gutenberg-tm depends upon and cannot survive without wide -spread public support and donations to carry out its mission of -increasing the number of public domain and licensed works that can be -freely distributed in machine readable form accessible by the widest -array of equipment including outdated equipment. Many small donations -($1 to $5,000) are particularly important to maintaining tax exempt -status with the IRS. - -The Foundation is committed to complying with the laws regulating -charities and charitable donations in all 50 states of the United -States. Compliance requirements are not uniform and it takes a -considerable effort, much paperwork and many fees to meet and keep up -with these requirements. We do not solicit donations in locations -where we have not received written confirmation of compliance. To SEND -DONATIONS or determine the status of compliance for any particular -state visit www.gutenberg.org/donate - -While we cannot and do not solicit contributions from states where we -have not met the solicitation requirements, we know of no prohibition -against accepting unsolicited donations from donors in such states who -approach us with offers to donate. - -International donations are gratefully accepted, but we cannot make -any statements concerning tax treatment of donations received from -outside the United States. U.S. laws alone swamp our small staff. - -Please check the Project Gutenberg Web pages for current donation -methods and addresses. Donations are accepted in a number of other -ways including checks, online payments and credit card donations. To -donate, please visit: www.gutenberg.org/donate - -Section 5. General Information About Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works. - -Professor Michael S. Hart was the originator of the Project -Gutenberg-tm concept of a library of electronic works that could be -freely shared with anyone. For forty years, he produced and -distributed Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks with only a loose network of -volunteer support. - -Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks are often created from several printed -editions, all of which are confirmed as not protected by copyright in -the U.S. unless a copyright notice is included. Thus, we do not -necessarily keep eBooks in compliance with any particular paper -edition. - -Most people start at our Web site which has the main PG search -facility: www.gutenberg.org - -This Web site includes information about Project Gutenberg-tm, -including how to make donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary -Archive Foundation, how to help produce our new eBooks, and how to -subscribe to our email newsletter to hear about new eBooks. - diff --git a/old/63890.zip b/old/63890.zip Binary files differdeleted file mode 100644 index 7c0af4b..0000000 --- a/old/63890.zip +++ /dev/null |
