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-The Project Gutenberg EBook of Don't Think About It, by William W. Stuart
-
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most
-other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
-whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of
-the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at
-www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have
-to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook.
-
-Title: Don't Think About It
-
-Author: William W. Stuart
-
-Release Date: December 16, 2019 [EBook #60935]
-
-Language: English
-
-Character set encoding: ASCII
-
-*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK DON'T THINK ABOUT IT ***
-
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-Produced by Greg Weeks, Mary Meehan and the Online
-Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net
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-
-
- _It isn't much of a secret, but
- it's the only one. The trick is ..._
-
- Don't Think About It
-
- By WILLIAM W. STUART
-
- [Transcriber's Note: This etext was produced from
- Worlds of If Science Fiction, November 1960.
- Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that
- the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.]
-
-
-Tommy wasn't really a timid child. Sometimes he didn't understand
-things and was puzzled. More often, grown-ups couldn't or wouldn't
-understand things that were perfectly clear to him and he was more
-puzzled. Occasionally such things worried and even upset him a little.
-Then Momma and sometimes Daddy would translate bafflement into silly
-adult terms and think that he was afraid.
-
-It was that way about the hole in the closet when Tommy was just a bit
-over three. Tommy wasn't really afraid. Mr. Bear was afraid and the
-thing did puzzle Tommy. So he asked about it, but he never did get any
-sensible or satisfactory answers, and that did worry and perhaps even
-upset him a little.
-
-But he wasn't afraid, even before Daddy finally told him, "Now, Tommy,
-boy. Don't think about it and it won't scare you. Really, there is
-nothing there to hurt you, if you just don't think about it. So don't
-you think about it any more--there's Daddy's big boy."
-
-This certainly was not any sort of explanation. But still Tommy did try
-hard not to think about it, as Daddy said. And now he really doesn't
-think about it at all any more. Or about Aunt Martha, either.
-
-The hole was in the closet in Tommy's room. Tommy and Momma and Daddy
-lived in a not very big, not very new frame house on the edge of the
-city and Aunt Martha lived with them. Tommy didn't--at least not yet,
-although there were promises--have any brothers or sisters. But he
-did have his own room and a family of his own, too. It was the extra
-bedroom and it had a closet that was cramped and with no light. Tommy
-liked his room. It was small, with a small bed, and it belonged to
-him, along with his family of Mr. Bear and Old Rabbit and Kokey Koala.
-It was also in easy crying range of Momma and Daddy's room and Aunt
-Martha's room, so if Mr. Bear, who was the timid one, got frightened in
-the night, Tommy could cry--purely in Mr. Bear's behalf--to bring help.
-Or at least company.
-
-Tommy and his family all liked the closet well enough too, except for
-the shelf that was out of reach even from the "don't climb" stool. The
-closet was good to hide in or play bear cave or rabbit hole and fine
-for finding missing toys after Momma had a spell of playing cleaning
-house.
-
-The day Tommy found the hole in the closet was the week after his
-third birthday. Daddy was at work. Momma was out shopping. It was a
-rainy afternoon. Aunt Martha was sitting with Tommy and the afternoon
-television.
-
- * * * * *
-
-He was in his room with his family and they all agreed as soon as they
-heard the television coming on strong that it would be a very poor
-afternoon to waste on a nap. Besides, Mr. Bear's feelings had been
-hurt by having been somewhat left out of things recently in favor of
-new birthday presents, now largely broken or tiresome. To make it up
-to him, Tommy and Old Rabbit and Kokey all agreed to play bear cave in
-the closet. It was a nice game and going well enough, except for some
-grumbling from Kokey Koala, who always wanted to argue and claimed that
-bears lived in trees, not caves.
-
-But then--and it was Mr. Bear's fault for wanting it darker, so he
-could hibernate--the closet door shut tight. That didn't seem so
-serious at first. It would only mean a scolding for being out of bed
-when Aunt Martha would come to open it after Tommy hollered loud
-enough. And then there was the hole in the closet, back in the corner
-next to the broken drum. They all saw it and they heard the Ugly Thing
-talking or thinking at them. It stretched out a part of itself at Mr.
-Bear, who was the closest.
-
-It didn't grab Mr. Bear, but he was terrified just the same. And none
-of them liked it. They didn't like it at all. The Ugly Thing couldn't
-come out of the hole because the hole wasn't big enough yet, but it
-tried and it was making the hole bigger. And it kept thinking at them,
-red thoughts, and hungry, as it tore at the edges of the hole. The
-family all looked to Tommy, so Tommy cried and yelled.
-
-Finally Aunt Martha heard him and came to open the door. Then the
-afternoon sunlight streamed across the floor into the closet and the
-ugly red thoughts from the Thing pulled back, far back, so you could
-barely notice them, and you couldn't see the hole any more, even though
-you knew it was still there. At least Tommy and Mr. Bear and Old Rabbit
-and Kokey Koala knew.
-
-After she opened the closet door and carried Tommy from the closet to
-the living room, Aunt Martha scolded. She wasn't really mad because
-she had waited until a commercial interrupted her television program
-before answering the cries from the closet. But she scolded because she
-was Aunt Martha and scolding was what Aunt Martha did. A really good
-cry, even one worked up strictly as a service for a companion, takes a
-little time to turn off. Then, after a few settling gulps, Tommy tried
-to explain.
-
-"Auntie. Aunt Martha, there's a hole in the cave--in the closet--and
-there's a Thing inside of it."
-
-He looked at Mr. Bear whom he was holding by one foot and at Kokey,
-dropped by Aunt Martha on the sofa, for confirmation. Then, quickly, he
-wriggled down from Auntie's lap. Old Rabbit!
-
- * * * * *
-
-Bravely, Tommy ran to the closet and was relieved. The door was open
-and, in the gray afternoon light, the hole was still not to be seen.
-Old Rabbit, who always had a bad temper, was annoyed and snappish at
-having been left behind. But he was there and all right. Tommy rescued
-him and ran back to Aunt Martha.
-
-"It was hungry," he continued his explanation.
-
-Aunt Martha, as always, was difficult. "Who is hungry? You shouldn't be
-hungry, Tommy. You just had your lunch an hour ago. Do you want a glass
-of milk?"
-
-"Not me hungry." Tommy was impatient. Aunt Martha never seemed able to
-grasp any idea more complex than a glass of milk or wet pants. Little
-boys, in her mind, nearly always either wanted the one or had the
-other. Such things she could and did attend to with a virtuous sense of
-duty done. But anything else was beyond her.
-
-"Tommy! Are your pants wet?"
-
-Tommy sighed in resignation and wet his pants. It was the only thing
-to do. Otherwise Auntie would fuss and fume, accomplishing nothing,
-understanding nothing, for the rest of the afternoon.
-
-Ten minutes later, in dry pants, he finished an unwanted glass of milk.
-Aunt Martha, conscience appeased, returned to soap opera. Tommy and his
-family, nap safely forgotten, played away the afternoon--but not in the
-closet or even, as was usual on rainy days, in Tommy's room. Instead,
-finding Daddy's old briefcase full of papers, they played office in the
-family room, with Old Rabbit grumbling about having to be Miss Wicksey,
-who drove the electric typewriter in Daddy's office.
-
-Momma and Daddy came home together at a bit after five. Tommy took his
-scolding about messing up Daddy's papers in good part. He had expected
-it. But Aunt Martha was angry about the scolding she got for letting
-him, mild though it was.
-
-In retaliation, she said, "Tommy, you were a naughty, naughty boy.
-And for being so naughty you must take your big bear and your rabbit
-and the little bear or whatever the thing is and put them away in the
-closet. And leave them there till tomorrow."
-
-"No! No, no, no, I won't! It isn't fair. They weren't bad. And the Ugly
-Thing is in the hole and it might come out and it's hungry and--and my
-family is all afraid."
-
-"Tommy!" Aunt Martha's voice was sharp. "You stop that nonsense and put
-your toys--"
-
-"Wait. Wait up now," said Daddy, who also lived in the grown-up world,
-but who sometimes tried to understand things. "What is this about a
-hole in the closet? What about something being hungry?"
-
-"That's all," said Tommy. "The Ugly Thing in the hole in the closet. It
-_is_ hungry."
-
-There was more to it than that, of course, but how could a thing like
-that be explained through a wall of grown, closed minds? There was
-the hole in the closet. You couldn't exactly see it. You could only
-sort of feel seeing it and the hairy Thing--at least it seemed hairy
-and shapeless, or having many different shapes and a mouth and sharp
-teeth--and it had reached out with something and touched Mr. Bear and
-would have eaten him too, if he had blood. But then it had pulled back
-from Mr. Bear and red hunger thoughts came stronger and stronger. Even
-now, stretching out from the hole where it was hidden there in the
-closet, Tommy could feel the reaching, greedy thoughts. But he couldn't
-explain all that.
-
-"There is a hole in the closet," Tommy said again.
-
- * * * * *
-
-But he knew that not even Daddy would understand. Of course Momma
-wouldn't. Not Momma, who was loving but very busy and just sat so
-often, dreaming or listening to baby sister that they said was in her
-stomach, so big and fat now as to leave little lap room. Momma was
-too occupied looking inward to look out much at Tommy. Daddy, to give
-him credit, was nearly always willing to look, but there were so many
-things he couldn't see. Still Tommy had to try.
-
-"The Ugly Thing in the hole. It wants something to eat."
-
-"Oh, Tommy! Such horrible nonsense!" That was Momma. She wasn't even
-going to think about it. It is a question sometimes whether baby
-sisters are worth all the bother and trouble.
-
-"Now, Tommy." Daddy was being helpful. "You say there is a hole in your
-closet? And that there is something in the hole?"
-
-"Well-ll. Sort of." Really, the Ugly Thing wasn't so much in the hole
-as on the other side of it. But that was close enough.
-
-"All right then, Tommy. Suppose you show it to me."
-
-"What?"
-
-"Show me the hole, Tommy."
-
-"Now?"
-
-"Yes."
-
-"The hole in the closet?"
-
-"Tommy!"
-
-"Yes, Daddy." This wasn't going to work out to anything good and Tommy
-didn't want to go back to the closet and close the closet door anyway.
-The Thing didn't eat Mr. Bear because Mr. Bear didn't have blood. But
-Daddy had and ... "Tommy!"
-
-They went to the closet. At least, if he was risking a Daddy, Tommy
-thought, he was protecting Mr. Bear and the others.
-
-"Now where is this hole, Tommy?"
-
-"Over there by the corner." Tommy pointed.
-
-Daddy went into the closet to look. Tommy started to close the door. In
-the black dark, Daddy would see what Tommy meant about the Thing in the
-hole. From the outside, Tommy started to close the door. It was a small
-closet and hardly big enough for both of them.
-
-"Tommy! What are you trying to do? Open that door."
-
-"But--" After all, the hole wasn't there, or scarcely seemed to be
-there, except in the dark.
-
-"Open it up wider. Hm-m. I believe I do see. Wait till I get my
-lighter.... Say, by George, I believe you're right. There _is_ a little
-hole there. Looks like a mouse hole."
-
-There it was, as Tommy might have known. Grown-ups will always avoid
-seeing the important things. Of course there was a mouse hole there,
-the home of the little old Mr. Mouse with the wiggly nose and the gray
-whiskers. He had been nice. But he wasn't there any more and Tommy had
-a pretty clear idea of what had happened to him. That poor little old
-Mr. Mouse had had blood.
-
-"But, Daddy--"
-
-It was hopeless. "Dorrie! Martha!" Daddy's hunting instinct was
-aroused. "Have we got a mouse trap? Any cheese? There is a hole in that
-closet, a little old mouse hole and I'm going to--"
-
-Well, perhaps this would be better than if he hadn't found anything.
-
-Tommy followed Daddy about as he finally located a mouse trap. No
-cheese? He cut a little piece of meat for bait. Of course Tommy knew no
-trap would catch the Ugly Thing.
-
-"What in the world happened to my lighter?" Daddy wanted to know. Tommy
-didn't answer that. But at least everybody, even Aunt Martha, had
-forgotten about shutting Tommy's family up in the closet. For now that
-was enough.
-
-But later, after supper, after bath, after the shooting picture on the
-TV, it was time for bed.
-
-"Daddy?"
-
-"Get on to bed now, son. Past bedtime. Hop to it."
-
-"Daddy, I want to sleep with you and Momma tonight."
-
- * * * * *
-
-Well, it was a mighty dark night. The afternoon rain had built up into
-a real storm. Mr. Bear was terrified. Kokey was scared and even tough
-Old Rabbit didn't want to sleep in Tommy's room with the Ugly Thing in
-the hole so hungry and waiting to rip its way out of the hole when it
-got dark enough--and only the street light outside the room to keep
-away the dark because they would never let Tommy keep his light on at
-night.
-
-"My family and me don't want to sleep in my room tonight."
-
-"Now, Tommy, just because it's a little stormy--Daddy's big boy isn't
-afraid of a little wind and rain?"
-
-"I'm not afraid, Daddy. It's my family. You know how families are. You
-always say about Momma--"
-
-"Never mind that now. To bed. Your own bed."
-
-"But Daddy, there's the Ugly Thing in the hole! And it's hungry!"
-
-"The mouse?"
-
-Daddy went to look at his trap, switching on the light in Tommy's room.
-He came back in a minute.
-
-"The little devil!"
-
-Did Daddy know? No.
-
-"The little devil got away with the bait, clean as a whistle. Only a
-little plaster dust or something left in the trap where I put the meat."
-
-Mr. Bear shivered. "Now don't be foolish, Bear. You don't _have_ blood.
-The Ugly Thing won't get you," Tommy told him softly. But Mr. Bear
-wouldn't listen. He was a cry-baby, a scaredy-cat. But to tell the
-truth--the real, honest truth--the whole family and even Tommy didn't
-feel too good about it.
-
-"Tommy? What was that you were saying?"
-
-"Daddy! I wanna sleep with you and Momma. Me and my family. We're
-scared of that Thing." Tommy knew it was no less than his duty to
-protect them all.
-
-"Oh, now, Tommy! You don't mean to say you're afraid of a little old
-mouse? A big boy like you?"
-
-"Well, Mr. Bear is--I don't--Daddy! It is there, honest it is, in that
-hole and it's hungry and it'll come out in the dark and--"
-
-"Tommy! A little mouse! Get on into your room now and no more argument."
-
-Tommy's face began to crumple. If he had to, he would fight this one
-out all the way--tears, tantrum, kick, scream, gasp, hold his breath
-and turn blue--
-
-"Now, now, Tommy-boy." Daddy did mean well and sometimes he was even
-right and so Tommy always did try to do what Daddy said. "Tommy, you
-mustn't let things like that bother you. If we can't catch the little
-mouse, forget it. There's nothing more we can do, so just don't think
-about it. You see?"
-
-Sniff. "No."
-
-"Don't think about it, that's all. There is nothing there that can hurt
-you, if you just don't think about it. So don't think about it--that's
-Daddy's big boy."
-
-"Well-ll.... And then can we sleep with you and Momma?"
-
-Aunt Martha rang in her nickel's worth. "A boy ought to be ashamed to
-be afraid of a little mouse."
-
-"It's not--"
-
-"Not what?"
-
-"Uh--it's Mr. Bear that's afraid. Of the--"
-
-"And you just stop that nonsense about those ridiculous stuffed
-animals, you hear me? Nobody should make such a fuss about a little
-mouse."
-
-"Momma does. Momma!" Tommy let two fat tears trickle down his cheeks, a
-warning, but he meant them too. "Momma-a-a, can't we--"
-
-"All right, all right! Stop this stupid wrangling! You know how it
-gets on my nerves. For goodness' sake, let him sleep with us tonight.
-Anyway, _I_ don't blame him. I wouldn't sleep a wink in the same room
-with a mouse. Be sure you shut our door tonight. Tight."
-
-"You're spoiling the child," said Aunt Martha sourly.
-
-"Auntie," said Tommy, "I bet you're chicken to let your door stay open."
-
-"Well!" huffed Aunt Martha. "The impertinence! I certainly _shall_ keep
-my door open. No mouse is going to keep me from getting good, fresh
-air."
-
- * * * * *
-
-Tommy was a very bright little boy. Now, with the door shut in Momma
-and Daddy's room, and Aunt Martha's door open, he wouldn't think about
-the Ugly Thing in the hole--waiting for dark, real dark--to come
-out--and eat.
-
-"All right, Tommy. This once you can sleep with your mother and me. Get
-on to bed and mind you sleep quiet. And don't spread those stuff--your
-family all over the bed either."
-
-"Yes, Daddy. And, Daddy--"
-
-"What?"
-
-"I won't think about it now, the Thing in the hole."
-
-Tommy said his good nights. Tonight he even kissed Aunt Martha as if
-he meant it. And he took his family and he went to bed in Momma and
-Daddy's room.
-
-He did not think about the Ugly Thing. He went right to sleep, lying at
-the edge of the big, big bed. Tommy, and Old Rabbit, and Kokey Koala,
-and even Mr. Bear went right to sleep.
-
-Outside the wind blew hard and harder and the rain drove down and it
-was dark. The television reception was bad. Everyone went to bed early.
-Good night. Lights out.
-
-In Tommy's room it was quite dark with only the faint, watery rays of
-the street light on the corner swimming in through the rain. In the
-closet there was a stirring, a fumbling, a tearing and the hole in the
-blackness grew, was forced, bigger, wider, as the Thing pushed and
-ripped at whatever was barring it from the warm, red, oozing food it
-craved; it must have; it would have.
-
-And, in a sudden gust, the wind blew harder still. Somewhere in town,
-blocks away, a wire fell and blue sparks flashed and crackled in
-the dripping night. In Tommy's house the refrigerator went off, the
-electric clocks stopped. The street light blinked once and was gone and
-in Tommy's closet there was a sudden, mighty surge of effort, a break,
-and something, not a sound, but something, a harsh and bloody sense or
-feel of rending greed flowing outward from the closet in a wave.
-
-Aunt Martha, in her sleep, said, "No. Oh, no!"
-
-Daddy interrupted a snore with a strained grunt. Momma whimpered softly
-and hugged to herself her swollen stomach.
-
-Tommy blinked and was awake. Soothingly, he patted Kokey and Old
-Rabbit. He squeezed Mr. Bear's paw. Then he slipped his hand into the
-opening in Mr. Bear's overalls and took out Daddy's cigarette lighter.
-He knew how to work it. But first he waited.
-
-"Don't think about it," Daddy had told him and he didn't think about
-it, really. But he couldn't help feeling it. The Ugly Thing was out,
-clear out of the hole now, and moving. He could feel that and the awful
-hunger moving with it. Aunt Martha's room was closest and her door was
-open. Momma and Daddy's room was closed. The Ugly Thing moved fast,
-faster, and reached out, thirsting, hungering....
-
-From Aunt Martha's room came the quavering wail and from the Thing
-there flowed a sense of vicious, evil joy.
-
-There it was, but was it enough?
-
-Tommy hugged Mr. Bear once, tightly, and slipped noiselessly from the
-bed. He wasn't thinking about it, he couldn't, he wouldn't think about
-it. But he knew what he had to do. He had the lighter. At the bedroom
-door he worked it. Opened the door a crack; thrust it out. And then, in
-a little rush, back to bed where he lay quietly, and he didn't think
-about it, he and Mr. Bear and Old Rabbit and Kokey Koala.
-
- * * * * *
-
-After a little, the sense of feeding hunger was gone and the feel of
-the Ugly Thing was gone, back into the hole in the closet, forced back
-by the flickering yellow light of the flames started by the cigarette
-lighter. Then, when the smell of smoke grew thick in the room and he
-could hear the crackling of the fire burning the house, Tommy shook
-Daddy awake.
-
-It wasn't hard to get out through the bedroom window, except for Momma.
-But she made it all right. And Tommy had a little trouble holding
-tightly to each member of his family as Daddy lifted him out of the
-window, but they made it all right too. Of course Aunt Martha didn't
-make it--how could she? But it was fun watching the firemen in the rain
-from the Krausmeyer's porch next door as the house and the closet with
-the hole in the closet all burned up together.
-
-Aunt Martha?
-
-"Funny thing," Tommy heard one fireman say to another the next day, in
-the sunshine, as they looked over the smouldering ash, "the old bat
-must have been as dry as dust inside. Twenty years in the department
-and I never did see a body so completely consumed--teeth, a little
-bone.... Hey, get on away from here, son! Get along on home with you!"
-
-Daddy and Momma said Aunt Martha had gone away on a trip. Tommy might
-have known pretty well where she had gone, if he had thought about it,
-but he didn't think about it. None of his family did. What for? Aunt
-Martha had had to go away, sure. She went. All right, who missed Aunt
-Martha?
-
-Anyway, there were lights in all of the closets in the new house they
-moved to and lots of room for everyone, even baby sister. And there
-were no holes, not even mouse holes, in any of the closets.
-
-
-
-
-
-End of Project Gutenberg's Don't Think About It, by William W. Stuart
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