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If you are not located in the United States, you'll have -to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook. - -Title: The Fortunate Island and Other Stories - -Author: Max Adeler - -Release Date: November 4, 2019 [EBook #60632] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: UTF-8 - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK FORTUNATE ISLAND, OTHER STORIES *** - - - - -Produced by Tim Lindell, Charlie Howard, and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This -file was produced from images generously made available -by The Internet Archive/American Libraries.) - - - - - - - - - -[Illustration: AN OLD MAN’S BLESSING. Page 126.] - - - - - THE - FORTUNATE ISLAND - - _AND OTHER STORIES_ - - BY MAX ADELER - - AUTHOR OF “OUT OF THE HURLY BURLY” “ELBOW ROOM” - “RANDOM SHOTS” ETC. - - BOSTON - LEE AND SHEPARD PUBLISHERS - NEW YORK CHARLES T. DILLINGHAM - 1882 - - - - - COPYRIGHT, 1881, - BY CHAS. HEBER CLARK. - -_All Rights Reserved._ - - - - -PREFACE. - - -The custom which has ordained that a book shall have a preface is -useful enough to writers who have to say to their readers something -which could not properly be said in the body of the text; but it -imposes a burden upon those who have no such communication to make. The -author of the present volume considers that he may fairly perform the -task by remarking that if the tales herein contained are not so amusing -as others he has written, they will perhaps be found to be quite as -entertaining, and possibly, in some particulars, more instructive. If -they shall be received by the public with the favor that was found by -the preceding volumes, the author will have reason to congratulate -himself that they have achieved success of a somewhat remarkable -character. - - MAX ADELER. - - - - -CONTENTS. - - - PAGE - THE FORTUNATE ISLAND 9 - - THE CITY OF BURLESQUE 107 - - AN OLD FOGY 221 - - MAJOR DUNWOODY’S LEG 252 - - JINNIE 311 - - - - -THE FORTUNATE ISLAND - - - - -THE FORTUNATE ISLAND. - - -CHAPTER I. - -THE ISLAND. - -When the good ship “Morning Star,” bound to Liverpool from New York, -foundered at sea, the officers, the crew, and all of the passengers -but two, escaped in the boats. Professor E. L. Baffin and his -daughter, Matilda Baffin, preferred to intrust themselves to a patent -india-rubber life-raft, which the Professor was carrying with him to -Europe, with the hope that he should sell certain patent rights in the -contrivance. - -There was time enough, before the ship sank, to inflate the raft and to -place upon it all of the trunks and bundles belonging to the Professor -and Matilda. These were lashed firmly to the rubber cylinders, and thus -Professor Baffin was encouraged to believe that he might save from -destruction all of the scientific implements and apparatus which he -had brought with him from the Wingohocking University to illustrate the -course of lectures which he had engaged to give in England and Scotland. - -Having made the luggage fast, the Professor handed Matilda down from -the ship’s side, and when he had tied her to one of the trunks and -secured himself to another, he cut the raft adrift, and, with the -occupants of the boats, sorrowfully watched the brave old “Morning -Star” settle down deeper and deeper into the water; until at last, with -a final plunge, she dipped beneath the surface and disappeared. - -The prospect was a cheerless one for all of the party. The sea was not -dangerously rough; but the captain estimated that the nearest land was -at least eight hundred miles distant; and, although there were in the -boats and upon the raft provisions and water enough for several days, -the chance was small that a port could be made before the supplies -should be exhausted. There was, moreover, almost a certainty that the -boats would be swamped if they should encounter a severe storm. - -The Professor, for his part, felt confident that the raft would outlive -any storm; but his shipmates regarded his confidence in it as an -indication of partial insanity. - -The captain rested his expectations of getting ashore chiefly upon the -fact that they were in the line of greatest travel across the Atlantic, -so that they might reasonably look to meet, within a day or two, with a -vessel of some kind which would rescue them. - -As the night came on, it was agreed that the boats and the raft should -keep together, and the captain had provided a lantern, which was swung, -lighted, aloft upon an oar, so that the position of his boat could be -determined. The Professor, with his raft under sail, steered along in -the wake of the boats for several hours, Matilda, meanwhile, sleeping -calmly, after the exciting and exhausting labors of the day, upon a -couple of trunks. - -As the night wore on, a brisk wind sprang up, and shortly afterward -the light upon the captain’s boat for some reason disappeared. The -Professor was somewhat perplexed when he missed it, but he concluded -that the safest plan would be to steer about upon the course he had -hitherto held, and then to communicate with the boats if they should be -within sight in the morning. - -The wind increased in force about midnight, and the raft rolled and -pitched in such a manner that the Professor’s faith in it really -lost some of its force. Several times huge waves swept over it, -drenching the Professor and his daughter, and filling them with grave -apprehensions of the result if the storm should become more violent. - -Even amid the peril, however, Professor Baffin could not but admire the -heroic courage and composure of Matilda, who sat upon her trunk, wet -and shivering with cold, without showing a sign of fear, but trying to -encourage her father with words of hope and cheer. - -When the dawn came, dim and gray, the gale abated its force, and -although the sea continued rough, the raft rode the waves more -buoyantly and easily. Producing some matches from his waterproof box, -the Professor lighted the kerosene-lamp in the tiny stove which was -in one of the boxes; and then Matilda, with water from the barrel, -began to try to make some coffee. The attempt seemed to promise to be -successful, and while the process was going on, the Professor looked -about for the boats. They could not be seen. The Professor took out -his glass and swept the horizon. In vain; the boats had disappeared -completely; but the Professor saw something else that attracted his -attention, and made his heart for a moment stop beating. - -Right ahead, not distinctly outlined, but visible in a misty sort of -way, he thought he discerned land! - -At first he could not believe the evidence of his sight. The captain, -an expert navigator, had assured him that they were eight hundred miles -from any shore. But this certainly looked to the Professor very much -like land. He examined it through his glass. Even then the view was not -clear enough to remove all doubts, but it strengthened his conviction; -and when Matilda looked she said she knew it was land. She could trace -the outline of a range of hills. - -“Tilly,” said the Professor, “we are saved! It _is_ the land, and the -raft is drifting us directly towards it. We cannot be sufficiently -thankful, my child, for this great mercy! Who would have expected it? -Taken altogether, it is the most extraordinary circumstance within my -recollection.” - -“Captain Duffer must have made a miscalculation,” said Tilly. “The ship -must have been off of her course when she sprang a leak.” - -“It is incomprehensible how so old a sailor could have made such a -blunder,” replied the Professor. “But there the land is; I can see it -now distinctly. It looks to me like a very large island.” - -“Are you going ashore at once, pa?” - -“Certainly, dear; that is, if we can make a landing through the -breakers.” - -“Suppose there are cannibals on it, pa? It would be horrid to have them -eat us!” - -“They would have to fatten us first, darling; and that would give us an -opportunity to study their habits. It would be extremely interesting!” - -“But the study would be of no use if they should eat us!” - -“All knowledge is useful, Tilly; I could write out the results of our -observations, and probably set them adrift in a bottle!” - -“It is such a dreadful death!” - -“Try to look at it philosophically! There is really nothing more -unpleasant about the idea of being digested than there is about the -thought of being buried.” - -“O, pa!” - -“No, my child! It is merely a sentiment. If I shall be eaten, and we -have volition after death, I am determined to know how I agreed with -the man who had me for dinner! Tilly, I have a notion that you would -eat tender!” - -“Pa, you are simply awful!” - -“To me, indeed, there is something inspiring in the thought that my -physical substance, when I have done with it, should nourish the -vitality of another being. I don’t like to think that I may be wasted.” - -“You seem as if you rather hoped we should find savage cannibals upon -the island!” - -“No, Tilly; I hope we shall not. I believe we shall not. Man-eaters are -rarely found in this latitude. My impression is that the island is not -inhabited at all. Probably it is of recent volcanic origin. If so, we -may have a chance to examine a newly-formed crater. I have longed to do -so for years.” - -“We might as well be eaten as to be blown up and burned up by a -volcano,” said Matilda. - -“It would be a grand thing, though, to be permitted to observe, without -interruption, the operation of one of the mightiest forces of nature! I -could make a magnificent report to the Philosophical Society about it; -that is, if we should ever get home again.” - -“For my part,” said Matilda, “I hope it contains neither cannibals nor -volcanoes; I hope it is simply a charming island without a man or a -beast upon it.” - -“Something like Robinson Crusoe’s, for example! I have often thought -I should like to undergo his experiences. It must be, to an inquiring -mind, exceedingly instructive to observe in what manner a civilized -man, thrown absolutely upon his own resources, contrives to conduct -his existence. I could probably enrich my lecture upon Sociology if we -should be compelled to remain upon the island for a year or two.” - -“But we should starve to death in that time!” - -“So we should; unless, indeed, the island produces fruits of some kind -from its soil. I think it does. It seems to be covered with trees, -Tilly, doesn’t it?” - -“Yes,” said Matilda, looking through the glass. “It is a mass of -verdure. It is perfectly beautiful. I believe I see something that -looks like a building, too.” - -“Impossible! you see a peculiar rock formation, no doubt; I shan’t be -surprised if there is enough in the geological formation of the island -to engage my attention so long as we remain.” - -“But what am I to do, meantime?” - -“You? Oh, you can label my specimens and keep the journal; and maybe -you might hunt around for fossils a little yourself.” - -The raft rapidly moved toward the shore, and the eyes of both of the -voyagers were turned toward it inquiringly and eagerly. Who could tell -how long the island might be their home, and what strange adventures -might befall them there? - -“The wind is blowing right on shore, Tilly,” said the Professor. “I -will steer straight ahead, and I shouldn’t wonder if we could shoot -the breakers safely. Isn’t that a sand-beach right in front there?” -inquired the Professor, elevating his nose a little, to get his -spectacles in focus. “It looks like one.” - -“Yes, it is,” replied Matilda, looking through her glass. - -“First-rate! Couldn’t have been better. There, we will drive right in. -Tilly, hoist my umbrella, so as to give her more sail!” - -The raft fairly danced across the waves under the increased pressure, -and in a moment or two it was rolling in the swell just outside of the -line of white breakers. Before the Professor had time to think what -he should do to avoid the shock, a huge wave uplifted the raft and ran -it high upon the beach with such violence as to compel the Professor -to turn a somersault over a trunk. He recovered himself at once, and -replacing his spectacles he proceeded, with the assistance of Matilda, -to pull the raft up beyond the reach of the waves. - -Then, wet and draggled, with sand on his coat, and his hat knocked -completely out of shape, he stood rubbing his chin with his hand, and -thoughtfully observing the breakers. - -“Extraordinary force, Tilly, that of the ocean surf,--clear waste, too, -apparently. If we stay here long enough, I must try to find out the -secret of its motion.” - -“Hadn’t we better put on some dry clothing first?” suggested Miss -Baffin, “and examine the surf afterwards? For my part I have had enough -of it.” - -“Certainly! Have you the keys of the trunks? Everything soaking wet, -most likely.” - -When the trunks were unfastened, the Professor was delighted to find -that the contents were perfectly dry. Selecting some clothing for -himself, he went behind a huge rock and proceeded to dress. Matilda, -after looking carefully about, retreated to a group of trees, and -beneath their shelter made her toilette. - -“Isn’t this a magnificent place?” said the Professor, when Matilda, -nicely dressed, came out to where he was standing by the raft. - -“Perfectly lovely.” - -“Noble trees, rich grass, millions of wild flowers, birds twittering -above us, a matchless sky, a bracing air, and--why, halloa! there’s a -stream of running water! We must have a drink of that, the very first -thing. Delicious, isn’t it?” asked the Professor, when Miss Baffin, -after drinking, returned the cup to him. - -“It is nectar.” - -“I tell you what, Tilly, I am not sure that it wouldn’t be a good thing -to be compelled to live here for two or three years. The vegetation -shows that we are in a temperate latitude, and I know I can find or -raise enough to eat in such a place as this.” - -“Why, pa, look there!” - -“Where?” - -“Over there. Don’t you see that castle?” - -“Castle? No! What! Why, yes, it is! Bless my soul, Tilly, the place is -inhabited!” - -“Who would have thought of finding a building like that on an island in -mid-ocean?” - -“It is the most extraordinary circumstance, taking it altogether, that -ever came under my observation,” said the Professor, looking towards -the distant edifice. “So far as I can make out, it is a castle of an -early period.” - -“Mediæval?” - -“Well, not later than the seventh or eighth century, at the farthest. -Tilly, I feel as if something remarkable was going to happen.” - -“Pa, you frighten me!” - -“No, I mean something that will be extraordinarily interesting. I know -it. The voice of instinct tells me so. Have you your journal with you?” - -“It is in the trunk.” - -“Get it and your lead-pencils. We will drag the baggage further up from -the water, and then we will push towards the castle. I am going to know -the date of that structure before I sleep to-night.” - -“There can hardly be any danger, I suppose?” suggested Miss Baffin, -rather timidly. - -“Oh, no, of course not; I have my revolver with me. Let me see; where -is it? Ah, here. And the cartridges are waterproof. I think I will put -a few things in a valise, also. We might find the castle empty, and -have to depend upon ourselves for supper.” - -The Professor then let the air out of the raft, and folded the -flattened cylinders together. - -When the valise was ready, the Professor grasped it, shouldered his -umbrella, and said, “Now, come, darling, and we will find out what all -this means.” - -The pair started along a broad path which ran by the side of the -stream, following the course of the brook, and winding in and out among -trees of huge girth and gigantic height. Birds of familiar species -flitted from branch to branch before them, as if to lead them on their -way; now and then a brown rabbit, after eyeing them for a moment with -quivering nostrils, beat a quick tattoo upon the ground with his hind -legs, then threw up his tail and whisked into the shrubbery. Gray -squirrels scrambled around the trunks of the trees to look at them, -and now and then a screaming, blue-crested kingfisher ceased his -complaining while he plunged into one of the pools of the rivulet, and -emerged with a trout in his talons. - -It was an enchanting scene; and Miss Baffin enjoyed it thoroughly as -she stepped blithely by the side of her father, who seemed to find -especial pleasure in discovering that the herbage, the trees, the -rocks, and all the other natural objects, were precisely like those -with which he had been familiar at home. - -After following the path for some time, the pair came to a place where -the brook widened into a great pool, through which the water went -sluggishly, bearing upon its surface bubbles and froth, which told -how it had been tossed and broken by rapid descents over the rocks in -some narrow channel above. Here the Professor stopped to observe an -uncommonly large and green bullfrog, which sat upon a slimy stone a few -yards away, looking solemnly at him. - -During the pause, they were startled to hear a voice saying to them,-- - -“Good morrow, gentle friends.” - -Matilda uttered a partly-suppressed scream, and even the Professor -jumped backward a foot or two, in astonishment. - -Looking toward the place from which the voice came, they saw an old -man with gray hair and beard lifting a large stone pitcher, which he -had been filling from the pool. He was dressed in a long and rather -loose robe, which reached from his shoulders to his feet, and which -was gathered about his waist with a knotted cord. This was his entire -costume, for his feet were bare, and he wore no hat to hide the -rich masses of hair which fell to his shoulders. As he offered his -salutation, he raised his pitcher until he stood upright, and then he -looked at the Professor and Miss Baffin with a pleasant smile, in which -there were traces of curiosity. - -“Good afternoon,” returned the Professor, after a moment’s hesitation; -“how are you?” - -“Are you not strangers in this land?” asked the old man. - -“Well, yes,” said the Professor, briskly, with a manifest purpose -to be sociable; “we have just come ashore down here on the beach. -Shipwrecked, in fact. This is my daughter. Let me introduce you. My -child, allow me to make you acquainted with--with--beg pardon, but I -think you did not mention your name.” - -“I am known as Father Anselm.” - -“Ah, indeed! Matilda, this is Father Anselm. A clergyman, I suppose?” - -“I am a hermit; my cell is close at hand. You will be welcome there if -you will visit it.” - -“A hermit! Living in a cell! Well, this _is_ surprising! We shall -be only too happy to visit you, if you will permit us. Delightful, -isn’t it, dear? We will obtain some valuable information from the old -gentleman.” - -The Hermit, with the pitcher poised upon his shoulder, led the way, and -he was closely followed by the Professor and by Matilda, who regarded -the proceeding rather with nervous apprehension. The Hermit’s cell was -a huge cave, excavated from the side of a hill. The floor was covered -with sprigs of fragrant evergreens. A small table stood upon one side -of the apartment; beside it was a rough bench, which was the only seat -in the room. A crucifix, a candle, a skull, an hour-glass, and a few -simple utensils were the only other articles to be seen. - -The Hermit brought forward the bench for his visitors to sit upon, and -then, procuring a cup, he offered each a drink of water. - -The Professor, hugging one knee with interlocked fingers, seemed -anxious to open a conversation. - -“Pardon me, sir, but do I understand that you are a clergyman; that is -to say, some sort of a teacher of religion?” - -“I belong to a religious order. I am a recluse.” - -“Roman Catholic, I presume?” said the Professor, glancing at the -crucifix. - -“Your meaning is not wholly clear to me,” replied the Hermit. - -“What are your views? Do you lean to Calvinism, or do you think the -Arminians, upon the whole, have the best of the argument?” - -“The gentleman does not understand you, pa,” said Miss Baffin. - -“Never mind, then; we will not press it. But I should like very much -if you would tell us something about this place; this country around -here,” said the Professor, waving his hand towards the door. - -“Let me ask first of the misadventure which cast you unwillingly upon -our shores?” said the Hermit. - -“Well, you see, I sailed from New York on the twenty-third of last -month, with my daughter here, to fulfil an engagement to deliver a -course of lectures in England.” - -“In England!” exclaimed the Hermit, with an appearance of eager -interest. - -“Yes, in England. I am a professor, you know, in an American -university. When we were about half way across, the ship sprang a -leak, from some cause now unknown. My daughter and I got off with our -baggage upon a life-raft, which I most fortunately had with me. The -rest of the passengers and the crew escaped in the boats. I became -separated from them, and drifted here. That is the whole story.” - -“I comprehend only a part of what you say,” replied the Hermit. “But it -is enough that you have suffered; I give you hearty welcome.” - -“Thank you. And now tell me where I am.” - -“You spoke of England a moment ago,” said the Hermit. “Let me begin -with it. Hundreds of years ago, in the time of King Arthur, of noble -fame, it happened, by some means even yet not revealed to us, that a -vast portion of that island separated from the rest, and drifted far -out upon the ocean. It carried with it hundreds of people--noble, and -gentle, and humble. This is that country.” - -“In-_deed_!” exclaimed the Professor. “This? This island that we are -on? Amazing!” - -“It is true,” responded the Hermit. - -“Why, Tilly, do you hear that? This is the lost Atlantis! We have been -driven ashore on the far-famed Fortunate Island! Wonderful, isn’t it? -Taking every thing into consideration, I must say this certainly is the -most extraordinary circumstance I ever encountered!” - -“Nobody among us has ever heard anything from England or of it, -excepting through tradition. No ship comes to our shores, and those -of us who have builded boats and gone away in search of adventure -have never come back. Sometimes I think the island has not ended its -wanderings, but is still floating about; but we cannot tell.” - -“But, my dear sir,” said the Professor, “you can take your latitude and -longitude at any time, can’t you?” - -“Take what?” - -“Your latitude and longitude! Find out exactly in what part of the -world you are?” - -“I never heard that such a thing was done. None of our people have that -kind of learning.” - -“Well, but you have schools and colleges, and you acquire knowledge, -don’t you?” - -“We have a few schools; but only the low-born children attend them, -and they are taught only what their fathers learned. We do not try to -know more. We reverence the past. It is a matter of pride among us to -preserve the habits, the manners, the ideas, the social state which our -fore-fathers had when they were sundered from their nation.” - -“You live here pretty much as King Arthur and his subjects lived?” - -“Yes. We have our chivalry; our knight errants; our tournaments; our -castles--everything just as it was in the old time.” - -“My dear,” said the Professor to Miss Baffin, “the wildest imagination -could have conceived nothing like this. We shall be afforded an -opportunity to study the middle ages on the spot.” - -“Sometimes,” said the Hermit, gravely, “I have secret doubts whether -our way is the best, whether in England and the rest of the world men -may not have learned while we have remained ignorant; but I cannot -tell. And no one would be willing to change if we could know the truth.” - -“My friend,” said the Professor, with a look of compassion, “the -world has gone far, far ahead of King Arthur’s time! It has almost -forgotten that there ever was such a time. You would hardly believe -me, at any rate you would not understand me, if I should tell you of -the present state of things in the world. But if I stay here I will -try to enlighten you gradually. I feel as if I had been sent here as a -missionary for that very purpose.” - -“Do you come from England?” - -“Oh, no! I was going thither. I came from the United States. You never -heard of them, of course. They are a land right across the ocean from -England, about three thousand miles.” - -“Discovered by a man named Columbus,” said Miss Baffin. - -“Your dress is an odd one,” continued the Hermit. “Are you a fighting -man?” - -“A fighting man! Oh, no, of course not. I’m a Professor.” - -“Then this is not a weapon that you carry.” - -“Bless my soul, my dear sir! Why, this is an umbrella! Tilly, we have -to deal with a very primitive condition of things here. It is both -entertaining and instructive.” - -“What is it for?” - -“I will show you. Suppose it begins to rain, I untie this string -and open the umbrella, _so_! Now don’t be alarmed! It is perfectly -harmless, I assure you!” - -The holy man had retreated suddenly into the furthest recess of the -cell. - -“While it rains I hold it in this manner. When it clears, I shut it up, -_thus_, and put it under my arm.” - -“Wonderful! wonderful!” exclaimed the Hermit. “I thought it was an -implement of war. The world beyond us evidently has surpassed us.” - -“This is nothing to the things I will show you,” said the Professor. -“I see you have an hour-glass here. Is this the only way you have of -recording time?” - -“We have the sun.” - -“No clocks or watches?” - -“I do not know what they are.” - -“Tilly, show him your watch. This is the machine with which we tell -time.” - -“Alive, is it?” asked the Hermit. - -The Professor explained the mechanism to him in detail. - -“You are indeed a learned man,” said the recluse. “But I have forgotten -a part of my duty. Will you not take some food?” - -“Well,” said the Professor, “if you have anything about in the form of -a lunch, I think I could dispose of it.” - -“I am awfully hungry,” said Miss Baffin. - -The Hermit produced a piece of meat, and hanging it upon a turnspit he -gathered a few sticks and placed them beneath it. The Professor watched -him closely; and when the holy man took in his hands a flint and steel -with which to ignite the wood, the Professor exclaimed,-- - -“One moment! Let me start that fire for you?” - -Taking from his pocket an old newspaper, he put it beneath the sticks; -then from his match-box he took a match, and striking it there was a -blaze in a moment. - -The Hermit crossed himself and muttered a prayer at this performance. - -“No cause for alarm, I assure you,” said the Professor. - -“You must be a wizard,” said the Hermit. - -“No; I did that with what we call a match; like this one. There is -stuff on the end which catches fire when you rub it,” and the Professor -again ignited a match. - -“I never could have dreamed that such a thing could be,” exclaimed the -recluse. “You will be regarded by our people as the most marvellous -magician that ever lived.” - -The Professor laughed. - -“Oh,” said he, “I will let them know it is not magic. We must clear all -that nonsense away. Tilly, I feel that duty points me clearly to the -task of delivering a course of lectures upon this island.” - -During the repast, the Hermit, looking timidly at Professor Baffin, -said,-- - -“Would it seem discourteous if I should ask you another question?” - -“Certainly not. I shall be glad to give you any information you may -want.” - -“What, then,” inquired the Hermit, “is the reason why you protect your -eyes with glass windows?” - -“These,” said the Professor, removing his spectacles, “are intended to -improve the sight. I cannot see well without them. With them I have -perfect vision. Tilly, make a memorandum in the journal that my first -lecture shall be upon Optics.” - -“Pa, I wish we could learn something about the castle we saw,” observed -Miss Baffin. - -“Oh, yes; by the way, Father Anselm,” said the Professor, “we observed -an old-fashioned castle over yonder, as we came here. Can you tell me -anything about it?” - -“The castle,” replied the Hermit, “is the home and the stronghold of -Sir Bors, Baron of Lonazep. He is a great and powerful noble, much -feared in this country.” - -“Any family?” inquired the Professor. - -“He has a gallant son, Sir Dinadan, as brave a knight as ever levelled -lance, and a beautiful daughter, Ysolt. Both are unmarried; but the -fair Ysolt fondly loves Sir Bleoberis, to whom, however, the Baron will -not suffer her to be wedded, because Sir Bleoberis, though bold and -skilful, has little wealth.” - -“Human nature, you observe, my child, is the same everywhere. We have -heard of something like this at home,” remarked the Professor to his -daughter. - -“Ysolt is loved also by another knight, Sir Dagonet. He has great -riches, and is very powerful; but he is a bad and dangerous man, and -the Baron will not consent to give him Ysolt to wife. These matters -cause much strife and much unhappiness.” - -“It’s the same way with us,” observed the Professor; “I have known lots -of such cases.” - -“I hope we shall stay here long enough to see how it all turns out,” -said Miss Baffin. - -“Of course,” replied the Professor. “You hated the island when you -thought it might promote the interests of science. But some lovers’ -nonsense would keep you here willingly for life. Just like a woman.” - -“The King,” said the Hermit, “has espoused the cause of Sir Bleoberis, -and we hope he may win the lady for the knight whom she loves.” - -“The King, eh? Then you have a monarchical government?” - -“We have eleven kings upon this island.” - -“All reigning?” - -“Yes.” - -“How many people are there in the whole island?” - -“No one knows, exactly. One hundred thousand, possibly.” - -“Not ten thousand men apiece for the kings! Humph! In my country we -have a million men in one town, and nobody but a common man to rule -them.” - -“Incredible!” - -“And what is the name of your particular king,--the one who is lord of -this part of the country?” - -“King Brandegore; a wise, and good, and valiant monarch.” - -“Tilly,” said the Professor, “you might as well jot that down. Eleven -kings on the island, and King Brandegore running this part of the -government. I must get acquainted with him.” - -When the meal was finished the Professor said to the recluse,-- - -“Do you allow smoking?” - -“Smoking!” - -“Pray excuse me! I forgot. If you will permit me, I will introduce you -to another of the practices of modern civilization.” - -Then the Professor lighted a cigar, and, sitting on the bench in a -comfortable position, with his back against the wall of the cave, he -began to puff out whiffs of smoke. - -The Hermit, with a look of alarm, was about to ask for an explanation -of the performance, when loud cries were heard outside of the cave -mingled with frightened exclamations from a woman. - -The occupants of the cavern started to their feet, just as a beautiful -girl, dressed in a quaint but charming costume, ran into the doorway in -such haste that she dashed plump up against the Professor, who caught -her in his arms. - -For a moment she was startled at seeing two strangers in a place where -she had thought to encounter none but the Hermit; but her dread of her -pursuer overcame her diffidence, and, clinging to the Professor, she -exclaimed,-- - -“Oh, save me! save me!” - -“Certainly I will,” said the Professor, soothingly, as his arm -tightened its clasp about her waist. “What’s the matter? Don’t be -afraid, my child. Who is pursuing you?” - -The Professor was not displeased at the situation in which he found -himself. The damsel was fair to see, and the head which rested, in what -seemed to him sweet confidence, upon his shoulder, was crowned with -golden hair of matchless beauty. Even amid the intense excitement of -the moment the reflection flashed through the Professor’s mind that he -was a widower, and that Matilda had always expressed a willingness to -try to love a stepmother. - -“My father! The Baron! He threatens to kill me,” sobbed the maiden, and -then, tearing herself away from the Professor in a manner which struck -him as being, to say the least, inconsiderate, she flew to Father -Anselm and said, “You, holy father, will save me.” - -“I will try, my daughter; I will try,” replied the Hermit. And then, -turning to the Professor he said, “It is Ysolt.” - -“Ah!” said the Professor, “the Baron’s daughter. May I ask you, miss, -what the old gentleman is so excited about? It is not one of the -customs here for indignant parents to chase their children around the -country, is it?” - -“I had gone from the castle,” said the damsel, partly to the Hermit -and partly to Professor Baffin, “to meet Sir Bleoberis at the -trysting-place. My father was watching me, and as I neared the spot he -rushed toward me with a drawn sword, threatening to kill me.” - -“It is an outrageous shame!” exclaimed the Professor, sympathetically. - -“I eluded him,” continued the sobbing girl, “and flew towards this -place. When he saw me at last he gave chase. I am afraid he will slay -me when he comes.” - -“I think, perhaps, I may be able to reason with this person when he -arrives,” said the Professor, rubbing his chin and looking at the -hermit over the top of his spectacles. “The Baron ought to be ashamed -of himself to go on in this manner! Tilly, wipe the poor creature’s -eyes with your handkerchief. There now, dear, cheer up.” - -Just then the Baron rushed into the cell, with his eyes flaming, and -his breath coming short and fast. - -He was a large man, with a handsome face, thick covered with beard. He -was dressed in doublet, trunks and hose, and over one shoulder a mantle -hung gracefully. His sword was in its sheath, and it was manifest that -he had repented of his murderous purpose. - -“Where is that faithless girl?” he demanded in a voice of thunder. - -Ysolt had hidden behind Matilda Baffin. - -“Say, priest, where have you secreted her?” - -“One moment!” said the Professor, stepping forward. “May I, without -appearing impertinent, offer a suggestion?” - -“Out, varlet!” exclaimed the Baron, pushing him aside. “Tell me, -Hermit, where is Ysolt?” - -The Professor was actually pale with indignation. Pushing himself in -front of the Baron, and brandishing his umbrella in a determined way he -said: - -“Old man, I want you to understand that you have to deal with a free -and independent American citizen! What do you mean by ‘varlet?’ I hurl -the opprobrious word back into your teeth, sir! I am not going to put -up with such conduct, I’d like you to know!” - -The Baron for the first time perceived what manner of man the Professor -was, and he paused for a moment amid his rage to eye the stranger with -astonishment. - -“Why do you want to hurt the young woman? Is this any way for an -affectionate father to behave to his own offspring? Allow me to say, -sir, that I’ll be hanged if I think it is! If you don’t want her to -marry Sir What’s-his-name, don’t let her; but it strikes me that -charging around the country after her, and threatening to kill her, is -an evidence that you don’t understand the first principles of domestic -discipline!” - -“What do you mean? Who are you? What are you doing here?” demanded the -Baron, fiercely, recovering his self-possession. - -“I am Professor E. L. Baffin, of Wingohocking University; and I mean -to try to persuade you to treat your daughter more gently,” said the -Professor, cooling as he remembered that the Baron had a father’s -authority. - -“You have a weapon. I will fight you,” said the Baron, drawing his -sword. - -The Professor put his cigar in his mouth, and opened his umbrella -suddenly in the Baron’s face. - -The Baron retreated a distance of twenty feet and looked scared. - -“Come,” said the Professor, closing his umbrella and smiling, “I am -not a fighting man. We will not quarrel. Let us talk the matter over -calmly.” - -But the Baron, mortified because of the alarm that he had manifested, -rushed savagely at the Professor, and would have felled him to the -earth had not Matilda sprung forward and placed herself, shrieking, -between the Baron and her father. - -At this precise juncture, also, a young man entered the cell, and, -seeing the Baron apparently about to strike a woman, seized his -sword-arm and held it. The Baron turned sharply about. Recognizing the -youth as his son, he simply looked at him angrily, and then, while Miss -Baffin clung to the Professor, the Baron seized Ysolt by the arm and -led her weeping away. - -The Professor, after freeing himself from Miss Baffin’s embrace, -extended his hand to the youth, and said,-- - -“I have not the honor of knowing you, sir, but you have behaved -handsomely. Permit me to inquire your name?” - -“Sir Dinadan; the son of the Baron,” said the youth, taking hold of the -Professor’s hand, as if he were somewhat uncertain what he had better -do with it. - -“No last name?” asked the Professor. - -“That is all. And you are?--” - -“I am Everett L. Baffin, a Professor in the Wingohocking University. I -was cast ashore down here with my daughter. Tilly, let me introduce to -you Sir Dinadan.” - -Sir Dinadan colored, and dropping upon his knee he seized Miss Baffin’s -hand and kissed it. Rising, he said: - -“What, Sir Baffin, is the name of the sweet lady?” - -“Matilda.” - -“How lovely!” exclaimed Sir Dinadan. - -“It is abbreviated sometimes to Tilly, by her friends.” - -“It is too beautiful,” said the youth, gazing at Miss Baffin with -unconcealed admiration. “I trust, Sir Baffin, I may be able to serve in -some manner you and the Lady Tilly.” - -“Professor Baffin, my dear sir; not Sir Baffin. Permit me to offer you -my card.” - -Sir Dinadan took the card, and seemed perplexed as to its meaning. He -turned it over and over in a despairing sort of way in his fingers. - -“If you will read it,” said the Professor, “you will find my name upon -it.” - -“But, Sir Baffin, I cannot read.” - -“Can’t read!” exclaimed the Professor, in amazement. “You don’t mean to -say that you have never learned to read!” - -“High-born people,” replied Sir Dinadan, with an air of indifference, -“care nothing for learning. We leave that to the monks.” - -“This,” said the Professor to Miss Baffin, “is one of the most -extraordinary circumstances that has yet come under my observation. -Tilly, mention in your journal that the members of the upper classes -are wholly illiterate.” - -“As the Lady Tilly is a stranger here,” said Sir Dinadan, “I would be -glad to have her walk with me to the brow of the hill. I will show her -our beautiful park.” - -“That would be splendid!” said Miss Baffin. “May I go, pa?” - -“Well, I don’t know,” said the Professor, with hesitation, and looking -inquiringly at the Hermit. As that individual appeared to regard the -proposition with no such feeling of alarm as would indicate a breach -of ordinary social custom, the Professor continued, “Yes, dear, but be -sure not to go beyond ear-shot.” - -Sir Dinadan, smiling, led Miss Baffin away, and the Professor sat down -to finish his cigar and to have some further conversation with the -Hermit. Before he had time to begin, two other visitors arrived. Both -were young men, gaily dressed in rich costume. One of them, whom the -recluse greeted as Sir Bleoberis, had a tall slender figure and an -exceedingly handsome countenance, which was adorned with a moustache -and pointed beard. His companion, Sir Agravaine, was smaller, less -comely, and if his face was an index of his mind, by no means so -intelligent. - -After being presented to the Professor, whom they regarded with not a -little curiosity, Sir Bleoberis said: - -“Holy father, the fair Ysolt was here and was taken away by the Baron, -was she not?” - -“Yes!” - -“Alas!” said the Knight, “I see no hope. Whilst I am poor, the Baron -will never relent.” - -“Never!” chimed in Sir Agravaine. - -“Is your poverty the only objection he has to you?” asked the Professor. - -“Yes.” - -“Well,” replied the Professor, “I can understand a father’s feelings in -such a case. It seems hard upon a young man, but naturally he wants his -daughter to be comfortable. Is there nothing you can turn your hand to -to improve your fortunes?” - -“We might rob somebody,” said Sir Agravaine, with a reflective air. - -“Rob somebody!” exclaimed the Professor, “That is simply atrocious! -Can’t you go to work; go into business, start a factory, speculate in -stocks, or something of that kind?” - -“Persons of my degree never work,” said Sir Bleoberis. - -The Professor sighed, “Ah! I forgot. We must think of something else. -Let me see; young man, I think I can help you a little, perhaps. You -agree to accept some information from me and I believe I can make your -fortune.” - -“Do you propose,” asked Sir Agravaine, “to drug the Baron, or to -enchant him so that he will change his mind? I have often tried -love-philters with ladies whose hands I sought, but they always failed.” - -“Nonsense!” exclaimed the Professor. “I don’t operate with such -trumpery as that. You agree to help me, and we’ll give this island such -a stirring up as will revolutionize it.” - -The Professor then proceeded to explain in detail the nature and -operation of some of the scientific apparatus which he had with him -in his trunk; and the Knight and the Hermit listened with open-eyed -amazement while he told them of the telegraph, the telephone, the -phonograph, the photograph, and other modern inventions. - -Whilst the Professor waxed eloquent, Sir Dinadan and Miss Baffin -strolled slowly back towards the cave. - -Sir Dinadan had improved the opportunity to offer Miss Baffin his hand, -rather abruptly. - -“But you can try to love me,” he pleaded, as she, with much -embarrassment but with gentleness, resisted his importunity. - -“I can try, Sir Dinadan,” she said, blushing, “but really I have -known you only a few moments. It is impossible for me now to have any -affection for you.” - -“Will to-morrow be time enough?” - -“No, no! I must have a much longer time than that.” - -“I will fight for you. We will get up a tournament and you will see how -I can unhorse the bravest knights. If I knock over ten, will that make -any difference in your feelings?” - -“Not the slightest!” - -“Fifteen?” - -“You do not understand. It is not the custom in our country to press a -suit upon a lady by poking people off of a horse.” - -“Perhaps I ought to fight your father? Will Sir Baffin break a lance -with me to decide if I shall have you?” - -“My father does not fight.” - -“Does not fight! Certainly you don’t mean that?” - -“He is the Vice-President of the Universal Peace Society.” - -“The WHAT?” asked Sir Dinadan, in amazement. - -“Of the Peace Society; a society which opposes fighting of every kind, -under any circumstances.” - -It was a moment or two before Sir Dinadan could get his breath. Then he -said-- - -“But--but then, Lady Tilly, what--what do men in your country do with -themselves?” - -Miss Baffin laughed and endeavored to explain to him the modern methods -of existence. - -“I never could have believed such a thing from other lips,” said Sir -Dinadan. “It is marvellous. But tell me, how do lovers woo in your -land?” - -“Really, Sir Dinadan,” replied Miss Baffin, blushing, “I have had no -experience worth speaking of in such matters. I suppose, perhaps, they -show a lady that they love her, and then wait until she can make up her -mind.” - -“I will wait, then, as long as you wish.” - -“But,” said Miss Baffin, shyly, although plainly she was beginning to -feel a genuine interest in the proceeding, “your father and your mother -may not think as you do; and then, I shall not want to stay upon this -island if I can get away.” - -“My mother always consents to anything I wish, and the Baron never -dares to oppose what she wants. And if you go back to your own country, -I will go with you, whether you accept me or not.” - -Miss Baffin smiled. Sir Dinadan was in earnest, at any rate. She -could not help thinking of the sensation that would be created in -Wingohocking if she should walk up the fashionable street of the town -some afternoon with Sir Dinadan in his parti-colored dress of doublet -and stockings, and jaunty feathered cap, and sword, while his long -yellow hair dangled about his shoulders. - -While Sir Dinadan was protesting that he should love her for ever and -for ever, they came back again to the Hermit’s cell, and then Sir -Dinadan, greeting Sir Bleoberis and Sir Agravaine, presented Miss -Baffin to them. - -Sir Bleoberis was courteous but somewhat indifferent; Sir Agravaine, -upon the contrary, appeared to be deeply impressed with Miss -Baffin’s beauty. After gazing at her steadily for a few moments, he -approached her, and while the other members of the company engaged in -conversation, he said,-- - -“Fair lady, you are not married?” - -“No, sir,” replied Miss Baffin, with some indignation. - -“Permit me, then, to offer you my hand.” - -“What!” exclaimed Miss Baffin, becoming angry. - -“I love you. Will you be mine?” said Sir Agravaine, falling upon one -knee and trying to take her hand. - -Miss Baffin boxed his ear with a degree of violence. - -Rising with a rueful countenance, he said,-- - -“Am I to understand, then, that you decline the offer?” - -Miss Baffin, without replying, walked away from him and joined her -father. - -Sir Dinadan was asking the Hermit for a few simples with which to -relieve the suffering of his noble mother. - -“I judge, from what you say,” remarked the Professor, “that the -Baroness is afflicted with lumbago. The Hermit’s remedies, I fear, will -be ineffectual. Permit me to recommend you to iron her noble back, and -to apply a porous plaster.” - -Sir Dinadan wished to have the process more clearly explained. The -Professor unfolded the matter in detail, and said,-- - -“I have some plasters in my trunk, down there upon the beach.” - -“Then you are a leech?” asked Sir Dinadan. - -“Matilda, my child,” remarked the Professor, “observe that word ‘leech’ -used by Sir Dinadan! How very interesting it is! Not exactly a leech, -Sir Dinadan; but it is my habit to try to know a little of everything.” - -“Can you cast a lover’s horoscope?” asked Sir Agravaine, looking at -Matilda. - -“Young man,” said the Professor, sternly, “there is no such foolery as -a horoscope; and as for love, you had better let it alone until you -have more wit and a heavier purse.” - -“I wish you and the Lady Tilly to come with me to the castle,” remarked -Sir Dinadan. “My father will welcome you heartily if you can medicine -the sickness of my mother; and she will be eager to receive your fair -daughter.” - -“I will go, of course,” replied the Professor; “you are very kind. -Tilly, we had better accept, I think?” - -Miss Baffin was willing to leave the matter wholly in the hands of her -father. - -After requesting Sir Dinadan to have his luggage brought up from the -beach, the Professor bade adieu to the Hermit, and then turning to Sir -Bleoberis, who stood with a disconsolate air by the fire, he said: - -“I will see you again about your affair; and meantime you may depend -upon my using my influence with the Baron to remove his prejudices. -I will dance at your wedding yet; that is, figuratively speaking, of -course; for, as a precise matter of fact, I do not know how to dance.” - -As the Professor and Sir Dinadan and Miss Baffin left the cell, Sir -Agravaine approached the lady and whispered: - -“Did I understand you to say you don’t love me?” Miss Baffin twitched -the skirt of her gown to one side in a scornful way, and passed on -without replying. - -“Women,” sighed Sir Agravaine, as he looked mournfully after her, “are -_so_ incomprehensible. I wish I knew what she meant.” - - -CHAPTER II. - -THE CASTLE OF BARON BORS. - -As Sir Dinadan led the Professor and Miss Baffin along the lovely path -which went winding through the woods toward the castle, the Professor -lighted another cigar, and in response to Sir Dinadan, he entered upon -an explanation of the nature of tobacco, the methods and extent of its -use, and its effect upon the human system. - -“The Lady Tilly, of course she smokes sometimes, also?” asked Sir -Dinadan. - -“Oh, no,” replied Miss Baffin, “ladies in my country never do.” - -“Of course not,” added the Professor. - -“And yet, if it is so pleasing and so beneficial as you say,” responded -the youth, “why should not ladies attempt it?” - -The Professor really could not say; Sir Dinadan was pressing him almost -too closely. He compromised further discussion by yielding promptly, -although with a melancholy reflection that his store of cigars was -small, to a request to teach Sir Dinadan, at the earliest opportunity, -to smoke. - -As they neared the castle, the Professor’s attention was absorbed -in observing the details of the structure. It was a massive edifice -of stone, having severe outlines and no ornamentation worthy of the -name, but presenting, from the very grandeur of its proportions, an -impressive and not unpleasing appearance. It was surrounded by a wide -fosse filled with water; and the Professor was delighted to observe, as -they drew near, that the entrance was protected with a portcullis and a -drawbridge. The bridge was drawn up, and the iron portcullis, made of -bars of huge size, was closed. - -“Magnificent, isn’t it, Tilly?” exclaimed the Professor, gleefully. “It -is probably the most perfect specimen of early English architecture -now upon earth. Most fortunately I have in my trunks a photographic -apparatus with which to obtain a picture of it.” - -Sir Dinadan seized a curved horn which hung upon the branch of a tree, -and blew a blast loud and long upon it. - -The Professor regarded the performance with intense interest and not a -little enthusiasm. - -The warder of the castle appeared at the grating, and, perceiving Sir -Dinadan, saluted him; then lowering the drawbridge and lifting the -portcullis, which ascended with many hideous creaks and groans from -the rusty iron, Sir Dinadan and his companions entered. - -Leaving the Professor and Miss Baffin comfortably seated in a great -hall, the walls of which were adorned with curious tapestries dark with -age, with swords and axes and trophies of the chase, Sir Dinadan went -in search of the Baron. - -“Little did we think, Tilly,” said the Professor, looking around, “when -we left New York four weeks ago--it seems more like four years--that we -should find ourselves, within a month, in such a place as this.” - -“I can hardly believe it yet,” responded Miss Baffin. - -“It does seem like a dream. And yet we are certainly wide awake, and we -are in the hall of a real castle, waiting for real people to come to -us.” - -“Sir Dinadan seems very real, too,” said Miss Baffin, timidly. - -“Very! There can be no doubt about it.” - -“And he behaves like a real young man, too,” continued Miss Baffin. “He -proposed to me this morning.” - -“What! Proposed to you! Incredible! Why, the boy has not known you more -than an hour or two.” - -“He is a man, pa; not a boy,” said Miss Baffin, a little hurt. “It -_was_ rather sudden; but, then, genuine affection sometimes manifests -itself in that way.” - -The Professor smiled; he perceived the exact situation of things. Then -he looked very serious again. This was a contingency of which he had -not taken account. - -“Well, Tilly,” he said, “I hardly know what to say about the matter. It -is so completely unexpected. You didn’t accept him?” - -“No; not exactly, but--” - -“Very well, then. We will leave the situation as it is for the present. -When we have been here longer we can better determine what we should -do.” - -Sir Dinadan entered with the Baron. The Baron greeted his guests with -warmth, making no allusion to the occurrences in the Hermit’s cell, and -appearing, indeed, to have forgotten them. - -“It is enough, sir, and fair damsel, that misfortune has thrown you -upon our shores. You shall make this your home while you live.” - -“A thousand thanks,” responded the Professor. - -“I cherish the belief that I can be of service to you. By the way, may -I ask how is the noble Lady Bors?” - -“Suffering greatly. My son tells me you are a wise leech, and can give -her release from her pain.” - -“I hope I can. If you will permit my daughter, here, to see the lady -and to follow my directions, we may be able to help her.” - -“There,” said the Baron, waving his hand, “are your apartments. When -you have made ready we will summon you to our banquet.” - -“Your property, which was upon the beach, will be placed before you -very soon,” said Sir Dinadan. - -The Professor and Miss Baffin entered the rooms, and the Baron withdrew -with his son. - -When the trunks came and were opened, the guests arrayed themselves -in their finest costumes, and Miss Baffin contrived to give to her -beauty a bewildering effect by an artistic arrangement of frippery, -which received its consummation when she placed some lovely artificial -flowers in her hair. - -Then the Professor, giving her certain plasters and a soothing drug or -two, requested a servant, who stood outside the door, to announce to -Lady Bors that Miss Baffin was ready to give her treatment. - -Sir Dinadan came forward and gallantly escorted Miss Baffin to his -mother’s room; where, after presenting her, he left her and returned to -the Professor. - -The young man led the Professor about the castle, showing him its -apartments, its furniture and decorations, with an earnest purpose to -try to find favor in the eyes of the father of the woman he loved. -The Professor, for his part, was charmed with his companion, and his -interest in the castle and its appurtenances increased every moment. - -“This,” said Sir Dinadan, pausing before a large oaken door, barred -with iron, “is the portal to the upper room of the south tower. In this -chamber the Baron has confined Ysolt, my sister, until she consents to -think no more of Sir Bleoberis.” - -“Locked her up, has he? That seems hard.” - -“Cruel, is it not?” - -“You favor the suit of the Knight, do you?” inquired the Professor. - -“I would let Ysolt choose for herself. He is a worthy man; but he has -poverty.” - -“We must try to help him,” said the Professor. - -“You would act differently in such a case; would you not?” asked Sir -Dinadan, rather eagerly. - -“Why, yes, of course; that is, I mean,” said the Professor, suddenly -recollecting himself, and what Miss Baffin had told him, “I mean, I -would think about it. I would give the matter thoughtful consideration.” - -Sir Dinadan sighed, and asked the Professor if he would come with him -to the dining-hall. - -It was a noble room. As the Professor entered it with Sir Dinadan, as -he looked at the vast fireplace filled with burning logs, because the -air of the castle was chilly even in summer time, at the rudely carved -beams that traversed the ceiling, at the quaint curtains and curious -ornaments upon the walls, at the long table which stretched across the -floor and bore upon its polished surface a multitude of vessels of -strange and often fantastic shapes, he could hardly believe his senses. -These things, this method of existence, he had read about myriads of -times, but they had never seemed very real to him until he encountered -them here face to face. - -These people among whom he had come by such strange mischance actually -lived and moved here, amid these scenes, and they were as common and -as prosy to them as the scenes in his own home in the little enclosure -hard by the walls of the university building at Wingohocking. - -It was that home and its equipment that seemed strange and incongruous -to him now. As he thought about it, he felt that he would experience -an actual nervous shock if he should suddenly be plumped down in his -own library. Very oddly, as his mind reverted to the subject, his -memory recalled with peculiarly vivid distinctness an old and faded -dressing-gown in which he used to come to breakfast; and a blue -cream-jug with a broken handle, which used to be placed before him at -the meal. - -It seemed to him that the dressing-gown and the defective jug were as -far back in the misty past as such a social condition as that with -which he had now been brought into contact would have seemed if he had -thought of it a month ago. - -As the servants entered, bearing the viands upon large dishes, the -Baron made his appearance at the upper end of the room, and a moment -later Lady Bors walked slowly in, leaning upon the arm of Miss Baffin. - -“Your sweet daughter,” she said, when the Professor had been presented -to her, “has eased my pain already. I think she must be an angel sent -to me by Heaven.” - -“She _is_ an angel,” said Sir Dinadan, emphatically, so that his mother -looked at him curiously. Miss Baffin blushed. - -“Angels, my lady, do not come with porous plasters,” said the -Professor, smiling. - -“I love her already, whether she is angel or woman,” replied Lady Bors, -patting Miss Baffin’s arm. - -“So do--,” Sir Dinadan did not complete the sentence. It occurred to -him that he might perhaps be getting a little too demonstrative. - -“The Lady Tilly,” said the Baroness, “has told me something of the -adventure which brought you here. Will you be so courteous as to tell -us more, and to inform us of that strange and wonderful land from which -you have come?” - -“Willingly, madam,” replied the Professor. And so, while the meal -was in progress, the Professor,--not neglecting the food, for he was -really hungry,--tried, in the plainest language he could command, to -convey to the minds of his hearers some notion of the marvels of -modern civilization. The Baron, Lady Bors, and Sir Dinadan asked many -questions, and they more than once expressed the greatest astonishment -at the revelations made in the Professor’s narrative. - -“I will show you some of these wonders,” said Professor Baffin. “Most -happily I have with me in my trunks quite a number of instruments, such -as those I have told you of.” - -“In your trunks!” exclaimed the Baron. “You do not wear trunks, as we -do.” - -The Professor at once explained the misapprehension. When he had done, -there was heard in the room the twanging of the strings of a rude -musical instrument. - -“It is the minstrel,” said Sir Dinadan, as the Professor and Miss -Baffin looked around. - -The Professor was delighted. - -“He is going to sing,” said the Baron. - -The bard, after a few preliminary thrums upon an imbecile harp, -burst into song. He occupied several moments in reciting a ballad of -chivalry, and although his manner was dramatic, his voice was sadly -cracked and out of tune. - -“Tilly,” said the Professor, “remember to note in your journal that the -musical system here is constructed from a defective minor scale, with -incorrect intervals. I observed precisely the same characteristics in -the song that our Irish nurse, Mary, used to put you to sleep with -when you were a baby. I stood outside the chamber door one night, and -wrote the strain down as she sang it. This proves that it is very -ancient.” - -“You like the song, then?” asked the Baron. - -“It is very interesting, indeed--very!” replied the Professor. “I -think we shall obtain a great deal of valuable information here. No, -Tilly, you had better refuse it,” said the Professor, observing that -Sir Dinadan, who appeared to be animated by a resolute purpose to stuff -Miss Baffin, was pressing another dish upon her, “you will spoil your -night’s rest.” - -“Do you sing, Sir Baffin?” inquired Lady Bors. - -“Never in company, my lady,” replied the Professor; “my vocalization -would excite too much alarm.” - -The Baron and his wife manifestly did not comprehend the pleasantry. - -“My daughter sings very nicely; but you can hear her sing without her -lips being opened. Excuse me for a moment.” - -The Professor went to his apartment, and presently returned, bringing -with him a phonograph. Placing it upon the table, he turned the crank. -From the funnel at once issued a lovely soprano voice, singing, with -exquisite enunciation and inflection, a song, every word of which was -heard by the listeners. - -Lady Bors looked scared, Sir Dinadan crossed himself, the Baron eyed -the Professor doubtfully, the minstrel over in the corner laid down his -harp, and relieved his overcharged feelings by bursting into tears, -which he wiped away with the sleeve of his tunic. - -“It must be magic,” said the Baron, at last; “no mere man could hide an -angelic spirit in such a place, and compel it to sing.” - -“Allow me to explain,” said the Professor; and then he unfolded the -mechanism, and showed the method of its operation. “My daughter sang up -several songs for me before we left home. They were stored away here -for future use. Tilly, my love, sing something, so that our friends can -perceive that it is the same voice.” - -Miss Baffin, after some hesitation, began “The Last Rose of Summer.” -While she sang, Sir Dinadan looked at her with rapture depicted on his -countenance. When she had done he reflected for an instant, and then, -rising and walking over to the place where the minstrel sat, he seized -by the ear that unfortunate operator with defective minor scales, and, -leading him to the door, he kicked him into the hall. - -This appeared to relieve Sir Dinadan’s feelings. - -When he returned, the Professor persuaded him to have his voice -recorded by the phonograph; and by the time the Baron and Lady Bors -had also tried the experiment, the faith of the family in the powers -of Professor Baffin had risen to such a pitch that the Baron would have -been almost ready to lay wagers in favor of his omnipotence. - -The Professor that evening accepted for himself and his daughter a very -urgent invitation to make the castle their home, at least until Fate -and the future should determine if they were to remain permanently -upon the island. The chance that they would ever escape seemed indeed, -exceedingly slender; and the Professor resolved to accept the promise -with philosophical resignation. - -He employed much of his time during the first weeks that he was the -Baron’s guest in making the Baron familiar with some of the wonders of -modern discovery and invention. The Baron also was deeply interested -in an exhibition given by the Professor of the powers of his patent -india-rubber life-raft, which the Professor brought up from the beach -folded into a small bundle. After inflating it, to the amazement of -the spectators, he put it into the fosse that surrounded the castle -and paddled about upon it. The raft was allowed to remain in the ditch -ready for use. - -The Professor often went outside the castle walls to talk with Sir -Bleoberis, and to comfort him. The Professor explained the telegraph -and the locomotive to the Knight; and when the Knight assured him -that the armorers of the island could make the machinery that would -be required, if they should receive suitable instructions, the -Professor arranged to build a short railroad line and a telegraph line -in partnership with Sir Bleoberis, if the latter would obtain the -necessary concession from King Brandegore. Professor Baffin was of the -opinion that the Knight, by such means, might ultimately acquire great -wealth. - -Meantime Sir Dagonet had been seen several times of late in the -vicinity of the castle, and once he had made again a formal demand -upon the Baron for Ysolt’s hand. This the Baron refused, whereupon Sir -Dagonet returned an insolent reply that he would have her in spite of -her father’s objection. The Professor sincerely pitied both Ysolt and -Sir Bleoberis, but as the Baron always became violently angry when the -suffering of the lovers was alluded to, the Professor disliked to plead -their cause. - -It occurred to him, however, one day that there could be no possible -harm in arranging to permit the forlorn creatures to converse with each -other; and so, with the help of Miss Baffin, who was allowed to enter -the captive’s room, he fixed up a telephone, the machinery of which he -had in one of his trunks, with a wire running from Ysolt’s window to a -point some distance beyond the castle wall. - -The battery with which the instruments were supplied was placed in an -iron box furnished by Sir Bleoberis, and hidden behind a huge oak tree. - -The lovers were delighted with the telephone and its performances; but -the Professor’s ingenious kindness caused him a great deal of serious -trouble. - -It seems that Miss Baffin one morning had been showing her father’s -umbrella to Ysolt, and making her acquainted with its peculiarities and -uses. - -When Miss Baffin had withdrawn, Sir Bleoberis began to breathe through -the telephone protestations of his undying love, and finally he -appealed to Ysolt to fly with him. Of course he expected nothing to -come of this appeal, for he had not the slightest conception of any -method by which Ysolt could escape from her prison. He merely threw it -in, in a general sort of a way, as an expression of the intensity of -his affection. - -But it suggested to the mind of Ysolt an ingenious thought; and she -responded through the telephone that if Sir Bleoberis would keep out -of sight and have his gallant steed ready, she would join him in a -few moments. The Knight’s heart beat so fiercely at this news that it -fairly made his armor vibrate. - -Obeying the orders of Ysolt, he went behind the oak and sat upon the -iron box containing the Professor’s battery and electrical apparatus. - -Ysolt’s window was but twenty feet from the surface of the water in the -fosse. Directly beneath it, by a most fortunate chance, floated the -life-raft of Professor Baffin. The brave girl, climbing upon the stone -sill of the window, hoisted the umbrella, and sailing swiftly downward -through the air, she alighted safely upon the raft. A single push upon -the wall sent it to the further side of the ditch, whereupon Ysolt -leaped ashore, unperceived by the warder or by any one in the castle. - -A moment more, and seated upon the steed of her cavalier, with his -strong arm around her, she would be flying to peace and happiness and -love’s sweet fulfilment, far, far beyond the reach of the angry Baron’s -power. - -But, alas, human life is so full of mischances! As Ysolt neared -the great oak behind which her lover sat, Sir Dagonet came riding -carelessly across the lawn. Seeing her he spurred his horse forward, -and, right before the eyes of Sir Bleoberis, he grasped her by the arm, -tossed her to his saddle and dashed away across the country. - -[Illustration: WHY SIR BLEOBERIS DID NOT LEAP TO THE RESCUE.] - -But why did not Sir Bleoberis leap to the rescue? - -Sir Bleoberis tried with all his might to do so; but he had on a full -suit of steel armor, and the Professor’s battery, by some means even -yet unexplained, so charged the cover of the box with magnetism that -it held the Knight close down. He could not move a muscle of his legs. -He writhed and twisted and expressed his fury in language that was -vehement and scandalous; but the Professor’s infamous machine held him -fast; and he was compelled to sit by, imbecile and raging, while the -wind bore to his ears the heart-rending screams of his sweetheart as -she cried to him to come and save her from an awful fate. - -The shrieks of the unhappy Ysolt penetrated to the castle, and at once -the Baron ran out, followed by Sir Dinadan, Professor Baffin, and a -host of the Baron’s retainers, all of them armed and ready for war. The -first act of the Professor was to capture his expanded umbrella, which -was being blown about wildly by the wind. Furling it, he proceeded to -the place where Sir Bleoberis sat, trying to explain to the infuriated -Baron what had happened. - -“There!” said Sir Bleoberis, savagely, pointing to the Professor, “is -the vile wretch that did it all! Seize him! He, he alone is to blame.” - -The Professor was amazed. - -“Yes!” exclaimed Sir Bleoberis, “it was he who persuaded the fair Ysolt -to leap from the window; it was he who notified Sir Dagonet, and it is -his wicked enchantment that held me here so that I could not fly to her -succor. I cannot even get up now.” - -“The man,” said the Professor to the Baron, “appears to be suffering -from intellectual aberration. I can’t imagine what he means. Why don’t -you rise?” - -“You, foul wizard, know that I am held here by your infernal power!” - -“Try to be calm,” said the Professor, soothingly. “Your expressions are -too strong. Let me see--. Why, bless my soul, the electrical current -has magnetized the box. There, now,” said the Professor as he snipped a -couple of the wires, “try it again.” - -Sir Bleoberis arose without effort. Baron Bors stepped forward and said -sternly: - -“What, you, Sir Bleoberis, were doing here I do not know. I suspect -you of evil purposes. But it is clear you had nothing to do with the -seizure of my daughter, if, indeed, she has been carried off by Sir -Dagonet. You may go. But as for you,” shouted the Baron, turning to the -Professor, “I perceive that your devilish arts have been used against -me and my family while you have been eating my bread. The world shall -no longer be burdened by such a monster. Away with him to the scaffold!” - -“This,” said the Professor, as the perspiration stood in beads upon his -pallid face, “is painful; very painful. Allow me to explain. The fact -is I--” - -“Away!” said the Baron, with an impatient gesture. “Off with his head -as quickly as possible!” - -“But, my dear sir,” contended the Professor, as the Baron’s retainers -seized him, “this is simply awful! No court, no jury, no trial, no -chance to tell my story! It is not just. It is not fair play. Permit -me, for one moment, to--” - -“To the block with him!” screamed the Baron. “Have no more parley about -it!” - -Sir Bleoberis came forward. - -“Sir Bors,” he said, “this, in a measure, is my quarrel. It falls to -me by right to punish this wretch. Will you permit me?” and then Sir -Bleoberis struck the Professor in the face with his mailed gauntlet. - -Professor Baffin would have assailed him upon the spot, but for the -fact that he was a captive. - -“He means that you shall fight him,” said Sir Dinadan, who retained his -faith in the Professor, remembering his own affection for Miss Baffin. - -“Certainly I will,” said the Professor. “Where, and when, and how? I -would like to have it out right here on the spot.” - -It is melancholy to think what would have been the sorrow of the -members of the Universal Peace Society, of which the Professor was the -first vice-president, if they could have observed the eagerness with -which that good man seemed to long for the fray, and the fiery rage -which beamed from his eyes until the sparks almost appeared to fly from -his spectacles. - -Miss Baffin at this moment rushed upon the scene, and in wild affright -flung her arms about her father. - -“The contest shall be made,” said the Baron, sternly. “Unhand him!” - -The Professor hurriedly explained the matter to Matilda, who sobbed -piteously. - -“You shall have my armor, my horse, and my lance,” said Sir Dinadan -in a kindly voice to the Professor. “Go and get them,” he continued, -speaking to some of the servants. - -“Thank you,” said the Professor. “I am much obliged. You are a fine -young man.” - -“But, pa,” said Miss Baffin through her tears, “surely you are not -going to fight?” - -“Yes, my love.” - -“And you a member of the Peace Society, too.” - -“I can’t help it, my child. You may omit to note this extraordinary -occurrence in your journal. The Society may as well remain in ignorance -of it. But I must conform to the customs of the place.” - -“How can you ever do anything upon a horse, with armor and a lance? It -is dreadful!” - -“No, my child, it may perhaps be regarded as fortunate. For many -years I have longed to observe the practices of ancient chivalry more -closely; that opportunity has now come. I am about to have actual -practical experience with them.” - -Miss Baffin wiped her eyes as Sir Dinadan came to her side and tried to -comfort her. Sir Agravaine, who had ridden up during the excitement, -dismounted when he saw Miss Baffin, and pulling Sir Dinadan by the -sleeve, he whispered: - -“You are acquainted with that lady?” - -“Yes.” - -“Would you mind ascertaining for me if I am to understand her -remarkable conduct to me as tantamount to a refusal? I don’t want to -trouble you, but--” - -Sir Dinadan turned abruptly away, leaving Sir Agravaine still involved -in doubt. - -When the armor came, Sir Dinadan helped the Professor to put it on. -It was a size or two too large for him, and the Professor had a -considerable amount of difficulty in adjusting the pieces properly, -but, with the help of Sir Dinadan, he at last succeeded. - -“Bring me my lance!” he exclaimed, with a firm voice, as he stepped -forward. - -“It is here,” said Sir Dinadan. - -“Farewell, my child,” said the Professor to Miss Baffin, making a -futile attempt to bend his elbows so that he could embrace her. -“Farewell!” and the Professor tried to kiss her, but he merely -succeeded in injuring her nose with the visor of his helmet. - -“O pa!” said Miss Baffin, weeping, “if you should be killed.” - -“No danger of that love, none at all. I am perfectly safe. I feel -exactly as if I were a cooking-stove, to be sure; but you may depend -upon my giving a good account of myself. And now, dear, adieu! Ho, -there!” exclaimed the Professor, with faint reminiscences of the tragic -stage coming into his mind. “Bring me my steed!” - -The determined efforts of four muscular men were required to mount the -Professor upon his horse. And when he was fairly astride, with his -lance in his hand, he felt as if he weighed at least three thousand -pounds, and the weapon seemed quite as large as the jib-boom of the -“Morning Star.” - -The warrior did his best to sit his horse gracefully; but the miserable -beast pranced and curveted in such a very unreasonable manner that his -spectacles were continually shaking loose, and in his efforts to fix -them, and at the same time to hold his horse, he lost control of his -lance, and came near impaling two or three of the spectators. - -Sir Dinadan’s own groom then took the bridle-rein, and leading the -horse quietly to the jousting-ground put him in place directly opposite -to Sir Bleoberis, whose lance was in rest, and who evidently intended -to spit the Professor through and through at the first encounter. - -The Professor really felt uncomfortably at a disadvantage in his -iron-clad condition, and he began to think that the sports and combats -of the olden time were perhaps not so interesting after all, when -brought within the range of practical experience. - -Suddenly the herald’s trumpet sounded a blast. The Professor had not -the least notion of the meaning of the sound, but Sir Bleoberis started -promptly towards him, and the Professor’s horse, trained at jousting, -also started. The Professor was not quite ready, and he pulled the rein -hard while trying to fix his lance in its rest. This caused the horse -to swerve sharply around, whereupon the warrior’s spectacles came off, -and the horse dashed at full speed to the side of the jousting-ground, -bringing the half-blinded Professor’s lance up against a tree, into -which the point stuck fast. The Professor was hurled with some violence -to the ground, and the horse ran away. - -When they picked him up and unlatched his helmet, he was bleeding at -the nose. - -“It is of no consequence, Matilda, of no consequence, I assure you,” he -said. “I am shaken up a little, but not hurt. I think, perhaps, I need -practice at this kind of thing.” - -The Professor, while speaking, felt about him in a bewildered way for -the pocket in which he was used to keep his handkerchief. But as the -armor baffled his efforts to find it, Miss Baffin offered him her -kerchief with which to stanch the blood. - -“The ancients, Matilda,” said the Professor, as he pressed the -handkerchief to his nose, “must have possessed great physical -strength, and they could not have been near sighted. By the way, where -are my glasses?” - -Sir Dinadan handed them to him. - -“You will not attempt to get on that horrid horse, again, pa, will -you?” said Miss Baffin, entreatingly. - -“I think not, my child, unless I am forced to do so. Jousting is -interesting to read about; but as a matter of fact it is brutal. -I think, Sir Dinadan, I should be more comfortable if I could get -this cast-iron overcoat off, so that I could move my elbows without -creaking.” - -Sir Dinadan helped him to remove his armor, and said: - -“My noble mother has insisted that Sir Bleoberis shall not fight with -you, and the Baron has yielded to her wish.” - -“How can I thank you?” exclaimed Miss Baffin. - -Sir Dinadan looked at her as if he would like to tell her how, if he -dared venture. But he only said: - -“I deserve no thanks. My mother is upon your side and that of your -father. She asks me to bring him to her.” - -The Baron was with his wife, and Sir Bleoberis stood before them. - -“Sir Bamn,” said the Baron, “Lady Bors insists that you are innocent -of any wrong-doing; and Sir Bleoberis, seeing that you are unskilled, -has resolved not to have a combat with you. I am willing to pardon you -upon one condition: that you find my daughter and bring her back to me.” - -“That I should be willing to try to do under any circumstances,” said -the Professor. “I regret her loss very deeply. But, you see, I know -nothing of the country. I am afraid I should not discover her if I -should go alone.” - -“I will go with you,” said Sir Bleoberis. - -“That is first-rate,” said the Professor. “Give me your hand.” - -“We will keep your daughter in the castle as a hostage,” said the -Baron. “When you return with Ysolt you shall have the Lady Tilly, and -Sir Bleoberis shall have Ysolt.” - -“I am profoundly grateful,” replied Sir Bleoberis, bowing. - -“My dear,” said the Professor to Miss Baffin, “does the arrangement -suit you?” - -“It suits me,” muttered Sir Dinadan. - -“I must stay whether I wish to or not,” replied Miss Baffin. “But I -shall worry about you every moment while you are gone.” - -“Sir Dinadan may be able to soothe her,” said Sir Bleoberis, with a -smile. - -“I think I could, if I were allowed to try,” insinuated Sir Agravaine. - -“I charge Sir Dinadan and his noble parents with the task,” said the -Professor. - -The entire party, with the exception of Sir Agravaine, then returned to -the castle, so that the Professor could make ready for the journey. - - -CHAPTER III. - -THE RESCUE. - -Professor Baffin politely declined to wear the armor of Sir Dinadan -upon the journey. He packed a few things in a satchel, and putting his -revolver in his pocket, he bade adieu to his daughter and the members -of the Baron’s family. Mounting his horse by the side of Sir Bleoberis, -who rode in full armor, the two trotted briskly out through the woods -to the roadway, which ran by not far from the castle. - -“Where shall we go to look for the lady?” asked the Professor, as the -Knight started down the road at a rapid pace. - -“The villain, no doubt, has carried her captive to his castle. We shall -seek her there.” - -“How are we going to get her out? I have had very little experience, -personally, in storming castles.” - -“We shall have to devise some plan when we get there,” replied the -Knight. “The castle, unhappily, is upon an island in the middle of the -lake.” - -“And I can’t swim,” said the Professor. - -“Perhaps the King will give us help. It is close to the place where he -holds his court.” - -The Professor began to think that the case looked exceedingly -unpromising. He lapsed into silence, thinking over the probable results -of the failure of his mission; and as the Knight appeared to be -absorbed in his own reflections, the pair rode forward without engaging -in further conversation. - -Professor Baffin did not fail to notice the extreme loveliness of -the country through which they were passing. It presented all the -characteristics of a perfect English landscape; but he observed that it -was not fully cultivated, and that the agricultural methods employed -were of a very primitive kind. - -After an hour’s ride, the two horsemen entered a wood. Hardly had they -done so before they heard, near to them, the voice of a woman crying -loudly for help. Sir Bleoberis at once spurred his horse forward, and -the Professor followed close behind him. - -Presently they perceived a Knight in armor endeavoring to hold upon -the horse in front of him a young woman of handsome appearance, who -screamed loudly as she attempted to release herself from his grasp. - -“Drop her!” exclaimed the Professor in an excited manner, and drawing -his revolver, “put her down; let her go at once!” - -The Knight turned, and seeing the intruders he released the maiden, and -levelling his lance, made straight for Sir Bleoberis at full gallop. - -The lady, white with terror, flew to the Professor, and reposed her -head upon his bosom. - -Professor Baffin was embarrassed. He had no idea what he had better do -or say. He could not repulse the poor creature; and as the situation, -upon the whole, was not positively disagreeable, he permitted her to -remain, sobbing upon his bosom, while he watched the fight and dried -her eyes, in a fatherly way, with his handkerchief. - -The two Knights came together with a terrible shock which made the -sparks fly; but neither was unhorsed or injured, and the lances of both -glanced aside. They turned, and made at each other again. This time the -lance of each pierced the armor of the other, so that neither lance -could be withdrawn. It really seemed as if the two knights would have -to undress and to walk off, leaving their armor pinioned together. A -moment later the strange Knight fell to the ground, and lay perfectly -still. The Professor went up to him and taking his lance from his hand, -so that Sir Bleoberis could move, unlaced the Knight’s helmet. - -He was dead. - -The Professor was inexpressibly shocked. “Why,” he exclaimed, “the man -is dead! Most horrible, isn’t it?” - -“Oh, no,” said Sir Bleoberis, coolly. “I tried to kill him.” - -“You wanted to murder him?” - -“Oh, yes, of course.” - -“I am so glad you did,” exclaimed the damsel with a sweet smile. “How -can I thank you? And you, my dear preserver.” - -“Bless my soul, madam,” exclaimed the Professor, “I had nothing to do -with it. I consider it perfectly horrible.” - -Turning to Sir Bleoberis, the maiden said, “It was you who fought, but -it was this brave and wise man who brought you here, was it not?” - -“Yes,” said Sir Bleoberis, smiling. - -“I knew it,” exclaimed the lady, flinging her arms around the -Professor’s neck. “I can never repay you--never, never, excepting with -a life of devotion.” - -The Professor began to feel warm. Disengaging himself as speedily as -possible, he said-- - -“Of course madam, I am very glad you have been rescued--very. But I -deeply regret that the Knight over there was slain. What,” asked the -Professor of Sir Bleoberis, “will you do with him?” - -“Let him lie. He is of no further use.” - -“I never heard of anything so shocking,” said Professor Baffin. “And -how are we to dispose of this lady?” - -“I will go with you,” exclaimed the damsel, looking eagerly at the -Professor. “Let me tell you my story. My name is Bragwaine. I am the -daughter of the Prince Sagramor. That dead Knight found me, a few hours -ago, walking in the park by my father’s castle. Sir Lamorak, he was -called. Riding up swiftly to me, he seized me, and carried me away. He -brought me, despite my screams and struggles, to this place, where you -found us both. I should now be a captive in his castle but for you.” - -Bragwaine seemed about to fall upon the Professor’s neck again, but he -pretended to stumble, and retreated to a safe distance. - -“Is there much of this kind of thing going on,--this business of -galloping off with marriageable girls?” asked the Professor. - -“Oh yes,” said Sir Bleoberis. - -“I thought so,” said the Professor; “this is the second case I have -encountered to-day. We shall most likely have quite a collection of -rescued damsels on our hands by the time we get back home. It is -interesting, but embarrassing.” - -“I know Prince Sagramor,” said Sir Bleoberis to Bragwaine. “We are -going to the court, and will take you to your father.” - -“_You_ will take me, Sir--Sir--” - -“Sir Baffin,” explained Sir Bleoberis. - -“Sir Baffin, will you not?” - -“You can have my horse. I will walk.” - -“I will ride upon your horse with you, and you shall hold me on,” said -Bragwaine. - -“That is the custom,” said Bleoberis. - -“But,” exclaimed the Professor with an air of distress, “I am not used -to riding double. I doubt if I can manage the horse and hold you on at -the same time.” - -“You need not hold me,” said Bragwaine laughingly; “I will hold fast to -you. I shall not fall.” - -“But then--” - -“I _will_ go with you,” said Bragwaine almost tearfully. “You won me -from the hands of that villain, Lamorak, and I am not so ungrateful as -to leave you to cling to another person.” - -“Well, I declare!” exclaimed the Professor, “this certainly is a very -curious situation for a man like me to find himself in. However, I will -do the best I can.” - -Professor Baffin mounted his steed, and then Sir Bleoberis swung the -fair Bragwaine up to a place on the saddle in front of the Professor. -Bragwaine clutched his coat-sleeve tightly; and although the Professor -felt that there was no real necessity that she should attempt to -preserve her equipoise by pressing his shoulder strongly with her head, -he regarded the arrangement without very intense indignation. - -He found that he could ride very comfortably with two in the saddle, -but he felt that his attention could be given more effectively to the -management of the horse if Bragwaine would stop turning her eyes up to -his in that distracting manner so frequently. - -They rode along in silence for awhile. Suddenly Bragwaine said: - -“Sir Baffin?” - -“Well; what?” - -“Are you married?” - -Professor Baffin hardly knew what answer he had better give. After -hesitating for a moment, he said: - -“I have been.” - -“Then your wife is dead?” - -The Professor could not lie. He had to say “Yes!” - -“I am so glad,” murmured Bragwaine. “Not that she is dead, but that you -are free.” - -Professor Baffin was afraid to ask why. He felt that matters were -becoming serious. - -“And the reason is,” continued Bragwaine, “that I have learned to love -you better than I love any other one on earth!” - -She said this calmly, very modestly, and quite as if it were a matter -of course. - -The Professor in astonishment looked at Sir Bleoberis, who had heard -Bragwaine’s words. The Knight nodded to him pleasantly, and said, “I -expected this.” - -Evidently it was not an unusual thing for ladies so to express their -feelings. - -The somewhat bewildered Sir Baffin then said, “Well, my dear child, it -is very kind indeed for you to regard me in that manner. I have done -nothing to deserve it.” - -“You are my rescuer, my benefactor, my heart’s idol!” - -“Persons at my time of life,” said the Professor, blushing, “have to be -extremely careful. I will be a father to you, of course! Oh, certainly, -you may count upon me being a father to you, right along.” - -“I do not mean that I love you as a daughter. You must marry me; you -dear Sir Baffin.” Then she actually patted his cheek. - -Professor Baffin could feel the cold perspiration trickling down his -back. - -“I think,” he said to Sir Bleoberis, “that this is, everything -considered, altogether _the_ most stupendous combination of -circumstances that ever came within the range of my observation. It is -positively distressing.” - -“You will break my heart if you will not love me,” said Bragwaine, as -if she were going to cry. - -“Well, well,” replied the bewildered Professor, “we can consider the -subject at some other time. Your father, you know, might have other -views, and,--” - -“The Prince, my father, will overwhelm you with gratitude for saving -me. I know he will approve of our marriage. I will persuade him to have -you knighted, and to secure for you some high place at court.” - -“That,” said the Professor, “would probably make me acutely miserable -for life.” - -Within an hour or two after the fight with Sir Lamorak, the Professor -and his companions drew near to Callion, the town in which King -Brandegore held his court. - -Just before entering it they encountered Prince Sagramor coming out -with a retinue of knights in pursuit of Sir Lamorak and his daughter. -Naturally he was filled with joy at finding that she had been rescued -and brought back to him. - -After embracing her, he greeted Sir Bleoberis and the Professor warmly, -thanking them for the service they had done to him. Bragwaine insisted -upon the Professor’s especial title to gratitude, and when she had told -with eloquence of his wisdom and his valor, and had added to her story -Sir Bleoberis’s explanation of the Professor’s adventures, the Prince -saluted the latter, and said: - -“There is only one way in which I can honor you, Sir Baffin. I perceive -that already you have won the heart of this damsel. I had intended her -for another. But she is fairly yours. Take her, gallant sir, and with -her a loving father’s blessing!” - -Bragwaine wept for happiness. - -“But, your highness, if I might be permitted to explain--” stammered -the Professor. - -“I know!” replied the Prince. “You will perhaps say you are poor. It is -nothing. I will make you rich. It is enough for me that she loves you, -and that you return it.” - -“I cannot sufficiently thank you for your kindness,” said the -Professor, “but really there is a--” - -“If you are not noble, the King will cure that. He wants such brave men -as you are in his service,” said the Prince. - -“I am a free-born American citizen, and the equal of any man on earth,” -said the Professor proudly, “but to tell you the honest truth, I--” - -“You are not already married?” inquired the Prince, somewhat -suspiciously. - -“I have been married; my wife is dead, and--” - -“Then, of course, you can marry Bragwaine. Sir Colgrevance,” said the -Prince to one of his attendants, “ride over and tell the abbot that -Bragwaine will wish to be married to-morrow!” - -“To-morrow!” shrieked the Professor. “I really must protest; you are -much too sudden. I have an important mission to fulfil, and I must -attend to that first, and at once.” - -Sir Bleoberis explained to the Prince the nature of their errand, and -told him the Professor’s daughter was held as a hostage until he should -bring Ysolt back to Baron Bors. - -“We will delay the wedding, then,” said the Prince. “And now, let us -ride homeward.” - -If it had not been for the heart-rending manner in which everybody -regarded him as the future husband of Bragwaine, and for the extreme -tenderness of that lady’s behavior toward him, the Professor would -have enjoyed hugely his sojourn at the court. King Brandegore regarded -him from the first with high favor, and the sovereign’s conduct of -course sufficed to recommend the Professor to everybody else. The -Professor found the King to be a man of rather large mind, and it was -a continual source of pleasure to the learned man to unfold to the -King, who listened with amazement and admiration, the wonders of modern -invention, science, and discovery. - -With what instruments the Professor’s ingenuity could construct from -the rude materials at hand; he showed a number of experiments, chiefly -electrical, which so affected the King that he ordered the regular -court magician to be executed as a perfectly hopeless humbug; but -Professor Baffin’s energetic protest saved the unhappy conjurer from so -sad a fate. - -An extemporized telegraph line, a few hundred yards in length, -impressed the King more strongly than any other thing, and not only -did he make to Sir Bleoberis and the Professor exclusive concessions -of the right to build lines within his dominions, but he promised to -organize, at an early day, a raid upon a neighboring sovereign, for -the purpose of obtaining plunder enough to give to the enterprise a -handsome subsidy. - -Sir Dagonet did not come to court during the Professor’s stay. But -there, in full view of the palace, a mile away in the lake, was his -castle, and in that castle was the lovely Ysolt. - -The Professor examined the building frequently through his -field-glasses, which, by the way, the King regarded with unspeakable -admiration; and more than once he thought he could distinguish Ysolt -sitting by the window of one of the towers overlooking the lake. - -The King several times sent to Sir Dagonet messages commanding Sir -Dagonet to bring the damsel to him, but as Sir Dagonet invariably -responded by trying to brain the messenger or to sink his boat, the -King was forced to give it up as a hopeless case. Storming the castle -was out of the question. None of the available boats were large enough -to carry more than half a dozen men, and Sir Dagonet had many boats of -great size which he could man, so as to assail any hostile fleet before -it came beneath the castle wall. - -But the Professor had a plan of his own, which he was working out in -secret, while he waited. Sir Bleoberis had procured several skilful -armorers, and under the directions of the Professor they undertook -to construct, in rather a crude fashion, a small steam-engine. This, -when the parts were completed, was fitted into a boat with a propeller -screw, and when the craft was launched upon the lake, the Professor was -delighted to find that it worked very nicely. The trial-trip was made -at night, so that the secret of the existence of such a vessel might -be kept from any of the friends of Sir Dagonet who might be loitering -about. - -It devolved upon Sir Bleoberis, by bribing a servant of Sir Dagonet’s -who came ashore, to send a message to Ysolt. She was ordered to watch -at a given hour upon a certain night for a signal which should be given -from a boat, beneath her window, and then to leap fearlessly into the -water. - -The night chosen was to be the eve of the Professor’s wedding-day. The -more Prince Sagramor saw of Professor Baffin and his feats, the more -strongly did he admire him; and in order to make provision against -any accident which should deprive his daughter of marriage with so -remarkable a man, the Prince commanded the wedding-day to be fixed -positively, despite the remonstrances which the Professor offered -somewhat timidly, in view of the extreme delicacy of the matter. - -Upon the night in question, the Professor, at the request of the King, -who was very curious to have an opportunity to learn from practical -experience the nature of the thing which the Professor called “a -lecture,” undertook to deliver in the dining-room of the palace the -lecture upon Sociology, which he had prepared for his course in England. - -The room was packed, and the interest and curiosity at first manifested -were intense; but the Professor spoke for an hour and three-quarters, -losing his place several times because of the wretched character of the -lights, and when he had concluded, he was surprised to discover that -his entire audience was sound asleep. - -At first he felt rather annoyed, but in an instant he perceived that -chance had arranged matters in an extremely favorable manner. - -It was within precisely half an hour of the time when he was to be in -the boat under the window of Ysolt. - -Stepping softly from the platform, he went upon tiptoe from the room. -Not a sleeper awoke. Hurrying from the palace to the shore, he found -Sir Bleoberis sitting in the boat, and awaiting him with impatience. - -The Professor entered the craft, and applying a lighted match to the -wood beneath the boiler, he pushed the boat away from the shore, and -waited until he could get steam enough to move with. - -A few moments sufficed for this, and then, opening the throttle-valve -gently, the tiny steamer sailed swiftly over the bosom of the lake, -through the intense darkness, until the wall of the castle, dark and -gloomy, loomed up directly ahead. - -A light was faintly burning in Ysolt’s chamber in the tower, and the -casement was open. - -As the prow of the boat lightly touched the stones of the wall and -rested, Sir Bleoberis softly whistled. - -“I have always been uncertain,” said the Professor to himself, “if the -ancients knew how to whistle. This seems to indicate that they did know -how. It is extremely interesting. I must remember to tell Tilly to note -it in her journal.” - -In response to the signal, a head appeared at the casement, and a soft, -sweet voice said: - -“Is that you, darling?” - -“Yes, yes, it is I,” replied Sir Bleoberis. “Oh, my love! my Ysolt!” he -exclaimed, in an ecstasy. - -“Is Sir Baffin there, too?” - -“Yes. We are both here; and we have a swift boat. Come to me at once, -dear love, that we may fly with you homeward.” - -“I am not quite ready, love,” replied Ysolt. “Will not you wait for a -moment?” - -“It is important,” said the Professor, “that we should act quickly.” - -“But I _must_ fix up my hair,” returned Ysolt. “I will hurry as much as -I can.” - -“Women,” said the Professor to his companion, “are all alike. She would -rather remain in prison for life than come out with her hair mussed.” - -The occupants of the boat waited very impatiently for fifteen or twenty -minutes. Then Ysolt, coming again to the window, said: - -“Are you there, dearest?” - -“Yes,” replied Sir Bleoberis, eagerly. “We are all ready.” - -“And there’s no time to lose,” added Professor Baffin. - -“Is your hair fixed?” asked the Knight. - -“Oh, yes,” said Ysolt. - -“Then come right down.” - -“Would ten minutes more make any difference?” asked Ysolt. - -“It might ruin us,” replied the Professor. - -“We can wait no longer, darling,” said Sir Bleoberis, firmly. - -“Then you will have to go without me,” said Ysolt, with a tinge of -bitterness. “It is simply impossible for me to come till I get my -bundle packed.” - -“We will wait, then,” returned Sir Bleoberis, gloomily. Then he said to -the Professor: “She had no bundle with her when she was captured.” - -The Professor, in silent desperation, banked his fires, threw open the -furnace-door, and began to wonder what kind of chance he would have in -the event of a boiler explosion. Blowing off steam, under the existing -circumstances, was simply out of the question. - -After a delay of considerable duration, Ysolt’s voice was heard again: - -“Dearest!” - -“What, love?” asked Sir Bleoberis. - -“I am all ready now,” said Ysolt. - -“So are we.” - -“How must I get down?” - -“Climb through the window and jump. You will fall into the water, but I -shall catch you and place you in the boat.” - -“But I shall get horridly wet!” - -“Of course; but, darling, that can make no great difference, so that -you escape.” - -“And spoil my clothes, too!” - -“Yes, Ysolt, I know; but--” - -“I cannot do it; I am afraid.” And Ysolt began to cry. - -Wild despair filled the heart of Sir Bleoberis. - -“I have a rope here,” said the Professor; “but how are we to get it up -to her?” - -“Ysolt,” said Bleoberis, “if I throw you the end of a rope, do you -think you can catch it?” - -“I will try.” - -Sir Bleoberis threw it. He threw it again. He threw it thirteen times, -and then Ysolt contrived to catch it. - -“What shall I do with it now?” she asked. - -“Tie it fast to something; to the bed, or anything,” replied the -Knight. - -“Now what shall I do?” asked the maiden, when she had made the rope -secure. - -“Slide right down into the boat,” said the Professor. - -“It would ruin my hands,” said Ysolt, mournfully. - -“Make the attempt, and hold on tightly,” said Sir Bleoberis. - -“We shall be caught if we stay here much longer,” observed the -Professor, with anxious thoughts of the boiler. - -“Good-bye then! I am lost. Go without me! Save yourselves! Oh, this is -terrible!” Ysolt began again to cry. - -“I will help her,” said Sir Bleoberis, seizing the rope and clambering -up the wall until he reached the window. - -Day began to dawn as he disappeared in the room. The Professor started -his fire afresh and shut the furnace-door. Sir Bleoberis, he knew, -would bring down Ysolt without delay. - -A moment later, the Knight seated himself upon the stone sill of the -window and caught the rope with his feet and one of his hands. Then he -placed his arm about Ysolt, lifted her out and began to descend. - -Professor Baffin, even in his condition of intense anxiety, could not -fail to admire the splendid physical strength of the Knight. When the -pair were about half-way down, the rope broke, and Ysolt and Sir -Bleoberis were plunged into the lake. - -The Professor, excited as he was by the accident, remembered the -boiler, and determined that he would have to blow off steam and take -the consequences; so he threw open the valve, and instantly the castle -walls sent the fierce sound out over the waters. - -Sir Bleoberis, with Ysolt upon his arm, managed to swim to the side of -the boat, and the Professor after a severe effort lifted her in. Then -he gave his hand to the Knight, and as Sir Bleoberis’s foot touched the -side the Professor shut off steam, opened his throttle-valve, backed -the boat away from the wall, and started for the shore. - -It was now daylight. As the boat turned the corner of the wall, it -almost came into collision with a boat in which, with ten oarsmen, -sat Sir Dagonet. The inmates of the castle had been alarmed by the -performances of the Professor’s escape-pipe; and Sir Dagonet had come -out to ascertain the cause of the extraordinary noise. - -The Professor’s presence of mind was perfect. Turning his boat quickly -to the right, he gave the engine a full head of steam and shot away -before Sir Dagonet’s boat could stop its headway. - -Sir Dagonet had perceived Ysolt, and recognized Sir Bleoberis. White -with rage he screamed to them to stop, and he hurled at them terrible -threats of vengeance if he should overtake them. As no heed was given -to him he urged his rowers to put forth their mightiest efforts, and -soon his boat was in hot pursuit of that in which the maiden, the -Knight, and the Professor fled away from him. - -By some means the people of the town of Callion had had their attention -drawn to the proceedings at the castle, and now the shore was lined -with spectators who watched with eager interest the race between Sir -Dagonet’s boat and the wonderful craft which had neither oars nor -sails, and which sent a long streamer of smoke from out its chimney. - -Professor Baffin, positively determined not to wed the daughter of -Prince Sagramor, had prepared a stratagem. He had sent three horses -to the side of the lake opposite to the town, and three or four miles -distant from it, with the intention of landing there, and hurrying -with Ysolt and Sir Bleoberis to the home of Baron Bors, without the -knowledge of the Prince. - -The daylight interfered, to some extent, with the promise of the plan, -but Professor Baffin resolved to carry it out at any rate, taking what -he considered to be the tolerably good chances of success. He turned -the prow of his boat directly toward the town, making as if he would -go thither. The pursuers followed fast, and as the Professor perceived -that he could easily outstrip them, he slowed his engine somewhat, -permitting Sir Dagonet to gain upon him. - -When he was within a few hundred yards of the shore, close enough -indeed, for him to perceive that the King, Prince Sagramor, Bragwaine, -and all the attendants of the court were among those who watched the -race with excited interest, the Professor suddenly turned his boat half -around, and putting the engine at its highest speed, ploughed swiftly -toward the opposite shore. - -A mighty shout went up from the onlookers. Manifestly the fugitives had -the sympathy of the crowd. - -The oarsmen of Sir Dagonet worked right valiantly to win the chase, but -the steamer gained constantly upon them; and when her keel grated upon -the sand, close by where the horses stood, the pursuers were at least a -third of a mile behind. - -Sir Bleoberis sprang from the boat, and helped Ysolt to alight. The -Professor stopped to make the fire in the furnace more brisk, and to -tie down the safety valve; then hurrying after Sir Bleoberis and Ysolt, -the three mounted their horses and galloped away. - -In a few moments they reached the top of a hill which commanded a view -of the lake. They stopped and looked back. Sir Dagonet had just touched -the shore, but, as he had no horse, further pursuit was useless. -So, shaking his fist at the distant party, he turned away with an -affectation of contempt, and entered the Professor’s boat to satisfy -his curiosity respecting it. - -“Let him be careful how he meddles with that,” said the Professor. - -As he spoke, the boat was torn to fragments. Sir Dagonet and two of -his men were seen to fall, and a second afterwards the dull, heavy -detonation of an explosion reached the ears of the Professor and his -friends. - -“It is dreadful,” said the Professor with a sigh, “but -self-preservation is the first law of nature, and then he had no right -to run away with Ysolt, at any rate.” - - -CHAPTER IV. - -HOW THE PROFESSOR WENT HOME. - -The three friends turned their horses’ heads away from the lake, and -pressed swiftly along the road. - -“It is necessary,” said Professor Baffin, “that we should make good -speed, for Prince Sagramor saw us come to this side of the lake, and -if he shall suspect our design no doubt he will at once pursue us, in -behalf of that abominable girl, his daughter.” - -The journey was made in silence during most of the time, for the hard -riding rendered conversation exceedingly difficult, but whenever the -party reached the crest of a hill which commanded a view of the road -in the rear, the Professor looked anxiously behind him to ascertain -if anybody was giving chase. When within a mile or two of Lonazep, he -did at last perceive what appeared to be a group of horsemen at some -distance behind him, and although he felt by no means certain that the -Prince was among them, he nervously urged his companions forward, -spurring, meantime, his own horse furiously, in the hope that he might -reach the castle of Baron Bors ere he should be overtaken. - -As the party came within sight of the castle, they could hear the hoofs -of the horses of the pursuers, and soon their ears were assailed by -cries, demanding that they should stop. It was, indeed, Prince Sagramor -and his knights, who were following fast. The Professor galloped more -furiously than ever when he ascertained the truth, and Sir Bleoberis -and Ysolt kept pace with him. - -Just as they reached the drawbridge, however, they were overtaken; and, -as it was raised, they were compelled to stop and meet the Prince face -to face. The Professor hurriedly called to the warder to lower the -bridge, so that Ysolt could take refuge in the castle. Then he turned, -and determined to make the best of the situation. The Prince was -disposed to be conciliatory. - -“We came,” he said, “to escort you back again. We have a guard of honor -here fitting for any bridegroom.” - -“You are uncommonly kind,” replied the Professor, “but the parade is -rather unnecessary. I am not going back just at present.” - -“I promised Bragwaine that you would return with us,” said the Prince, -sternly. - -“Well, you ought not to make rash promises,” replied the Professor, -with firmness. - -“You will go, of course?” - -“Of course I will not go.” - -“Bragwaine is waiting for you.” - -“That,” said the Professor, “is a matter of perfect indifference to me.” - -“I will not be trifled with, sir,” said the Prince, angrily. - -“Nor will I,” exclaimed the Professor. “Let us understand one another. -I do not wish to marry any one. I did not ask your daughter to marry -me, and I have never consented to the union. I tell you now that I -positively and absolutely refuse to be forced to marry her or any other -woman. I will do as I please about it; not as you please.” - -“Seize him,” shrieked the Prince to his attendants. - -“Stand off,” said the Professor, presenting his revolver. “I’ll kill -the man who approaches me. I shall put up with this foolishness no -longer.” - -One of the knights rode toward him. The Professor fired, and the -cavalier’s horse rolled in the dust. The Prince and his people were -stupefied with astonishment. - -At this juncture, Baron Bors, Sir Dinadan, Sir Agravaine, Sir -Bleoberis, and Miss Baffin emerged from the castle. Miss Baffin flew -to her father, and flung her arms about him. The Professor kissed her -tenderly, and as he did so, his eye caught sight of the wire of the -telephone which he had arranged for Ysolt and Sir Bleoberis. A happy -thought struck him. Advancing, he said to the Prince: - -“It is useless for us to quarrel over this matter. Baron Bors has here -an oracle. Let us consult that.” - -Then the Professor whispered something to Miss Baffin, who withdrew -unobserved and went into the castle. - -The Prince was at first indisposed to condescend to accept the offer, -but his curiosity finally overcame his pride. - -“Step this way,” said the Professor. “Ask your questions through this,” -handing him the mouthpiece, “and put this to your ear for the answer.” - -“What shall I say?” inquired the Prince. - -“Ask if it is right that I should marry your daughter.” - -The Prince put the question, and the answer came. - -“What does the oracle say?” asked the Professor. - -“It says you shall not,” replied the Prince, looking a good deal scared. - -“Are you satisfied?” said the Professor. - -The Prince did not answer, but he looked as if he suspected a trick of -some kind, and would like to impale Professor Baffin with his lance, if -he dared. - -He was about to turn away in disgust, when Sir Agravaine, who stood -beside him, in a few half-whispered words explained to him the method -by which the Professor had imposed upon him. - -In a raging fury, the Prince rode up to the Professor, and would have -assailed him; but Baron Bors advanced and said: - -“This gentleman is unarmed, and unused to our methods of combat. He is -my guest, and he has saved my daughter. I will fight his battles.” - -The Prince threw his glove at the Baron’s feet. Baron Bors called -for his armor and his horse, and when he was ready he took his place -opposite to his antagonist, and waited the signal for the contest. - -“This,” said the Professor, “is probably the most asinine proceeding -upon record. Because I won’t marry Sagramor’s daughter, Sagramor is -going to fight with a man who never saw his daughter.” - -[Illustration: AT THE FIRST SHOCK BOTH KNIGHTS WERE UNHORSED.] - -The combat was not a long one. At the first shock both knights were -unhorsed; but, drawing their swords, they rushed together and hacked at -each other until the sparks flew in showers from their armor. - -The Baron fought well, but presently the Prince’s sword struck his -shoulder with a blow which carried the blade down through the steel -plate, and caused the blood to spurt forth. The Baron fell to the -earth; and Prince Sagramor, remembering the small number of his -attendants, and the probability that he might be assailed by the -Baron’s people, mounted his horse and slowly trotted away without -deigning to look at Professor Baffin. They carried the Baron tenderly -into the castle, and put him to bed. The wound was a terrible one, and -the Professor perceived that the chances of his recovery, under the -rude medical treatment that could be obtained, were not very favorable. -After doing what he could to help the sufferer, he withdrew from the -room, and left the Baron with Lady Bors and the medical practitioner -who was ordinarily employed by the family. - -Miss Baffin, with Sir Dinadan, awaited her father in the hall. This was -the first opportunity he had had to greet her. After some preliminary -conversation, and after the Professor had expressed to Sir Dinadan his -regret that the Baron should have been injured, the Professor said: - -“And now, Tilly, my love, how have you been employing yourself during -my absence?” - -Miss Baffin blushed. - -“Have you kept the journal regularly?” asked the Professor. - -“Not so _very_ regularly,” replied Miss Baffin. - -“I have a number of interesting and extraordinary things for you to -record,” said the Professor. “Has nothing of a remarkable character -happened here during my absence?” - -“Oh, yes,” said Miss Baffin. - -“I have learned to smoke,” said Sir Dinadan. - -“Indeed,” said the Professor with a slight pang. “And how many cigars -have you smoked?” - -“Only one,” replied the Knight. “It made me ill for two days. I think, -perhaps, I shall give up smoking.” - -“I would advise you to. It is a bad habit,” said the Professor, “and -expensive. And then, you know, cigars are so dreadfully scarce, too.” - -“The Lady Tilly was very kind to me while I was ill. I believe I was -delirious once or twice; and I was so touched by her sweet patience -that I again proposed to her.” - -“While you were delirious?” asked the Professor. - -“Oh, no; when I had recovered.” - -“What did you say to that, Tilly?” asked Professor Baffin. - -“I referred him to you,” replied Miss Baffin. - -“But what will the Baron say?” asked the Professor. - -“He and my mother have given their consent,” said Sir Dinadan. “They -declared that I could not have pleased them better than by making such -a choice.” - -“Well, I don’t know,” said the Professor, reflectively. “I like you -first-rate, and if I felt certain we were going to stay here--” - -“I will go with you if you leave the island,” said Sir Dinadan, eagerly. - -“And then you know, Din,” continued the Professor familiarly, “Tilly is -highly educated, while you--Well, you know you must learn to read, and -write, and cipher, the very first thing.” - -“I have been giving him lessons while you were away,” said Miss Baffin. - -“How does he get along?” - -“Quite well. He can do short division with a little help, and he has -learned as far as the eighth line in the multiplication table.” - -“Eight eights are sixty-four, eight nines are seventy-two, eight tens -are eighty,” said Sir Dinadan, triumphantly. - -“Well,” said the Professor, “if Tilly loves you, and you love Tilly, I -shall make no objection.” - -“Oh, thank you,” exclaimed both of the lovers. - -“But, I tell you what, Din, you are getting a good bargain. There is -no finer girl, or a smarter one either, on the globe. You people here -cannot half appreciate her.” - -For more than a week, Baron Bors failed to show any signs of -improvement, and the Professor thought he perceived clearly that his -case was fast getting beyond hope. He deemed it prudent, however, to -keep his opinion from the members of the Baron’s family. But the Baron -himself soon reached the same conclusion, and one day Lady Bors came -out of his room to summon Sir Dinadan, Ysolt, Sir Bleoberis, who was -now formally betrothed to Ysolt, and the Professor, to the Baron’s -bedside. - -The Baron said to them, in a feeble voice, that he felt his end -approaching, and that he desired to give some instructions, and to say -farewell to his family. Then he addressed himself first to Sir Dinadan, -and next to Ysolt. When he had finished speaking to them he said to -Lady Bors,-- - -“And now, Ettard, a final word to you. I am going away, and you will -need another friend, protector, companion, husband. Have you ever -thought of any one whom you should like, other than me?” - -“Never, never, never,” said Lady Bors, sobbing. - -“Let me advise you, then. Who would be more likely to fill my place in -your heart acceptably than our good and wise and wonderful friend Sir -Baffin?” - -“Good gracious!” exclaimed the Professor with a start. - -“Your son is to marry his daughter; and she will be happy to be here -with him in the castle. Promise me that you will try to love him.” - -“Yes, I will try,” said Lady Bors, wiping her eyes and seeming, upon -the whole, rather more cheerful. - -“That,” said the Baron, “does not altogether satisfy me. I place upon -you my command that you shall marry him. Will you consent to obey?” - -“I will consent to anything, so that your last hour may be happier,” -said Lady Bors with an air of resignation. She was supported during -the trial, perhaps, by the reflection that in dealing with lumbago -Professor Baffin had no superior in the kingdom. - -Father Anselm was announced. “Withdraw, now,” said the Baron to all of -his family but Lady Bors. “I must speak with the Hermit.” - -Professor Baffin encountered the Hermit at the door. The holy man -stopped long enough to say that a huge ship had come near to the shore -upon which the Professor had landed, and that it was anchored there. -From its mast, Father Anselm said, fluttered a banner of red and white -stripes with a starry field of blue. - -The Professor’s heart beat fast. For a moment he could hardly control -his emotion. He resolved to go at once to the shore and to take his -daughter with him. Withdrawing her from her companions the two strolled -slowly out from the castle into the park. Then, hastening their steps, -they passed towards the shore. In a few moments they reached it, -and there, sure enough, they saw a barque at anchor, while from her -mast-head floated the American flag. - -A boat belonging to the barque had come to the shore to obtain water -from the stream. Professor Baffin entered into conversation with the -officer who commanded the boat. The vessel proved to be the _Mary L. -Simpson_, of Martha’s Vineyard, bound from the Azores to New York. When -the Professor had explained to the officer that he and his daughter -were Americans, the mate invited them to come aboard so that he could -introduce them to the captain. - -“Shall we go, my child?” asked the Professor. - -“If we can return in a very few moments, we might go,” said Miss Baffin. - -They entered the boat, and when they reached the vessel, they were -warmly greeted by Captain Magruder. - -While they were talking with him in his cabin the air suddenly -darkened, and the captain rushed out upon deck. Almost before he -reached it a terrific gale struck the barque, and she began to drag her -anchors. Fortunately the wind blew off shore, and the captain, weighing -anchor, let the barque drive right out to sea. The Professor was about -to remark to Miss Baffin that he feared there was small chance of his -ever seeing the island again, when a lurch of the vessel threw him -over. His head struck the sharp corner of the captain’s chest, and he -became unconscious. - -When Professor Baffin regained his senses, he found that he was lying -in a berth in a ship’s cabin. Some one was sitting beside him,-- - -“Is that you, Tilly?” he asked, in a faint voice. - -“Yes, pa; I am glad you are conscious again. Can I give you anything?” - -“Have I been long unconscious, Tilly?” - -“You have been very ill for several days; delirious sometimes.” - -“Is the captain going back to the island?” - -“Going back to the _what_, pa?” - -“To the Island. It must have seemed dreadfully heartless for us to -leave the castle while the Baron was dying.” - -“While the Baron was dying! What do you mean?” - -“Why, Baron Bors could not have lived much longer. I am afraid Sir -Dinadan will think hard of us.” - -“I haven’t the least idea what you are talking about. Poor pa! your -mind is beginning to wander again. Turn over, and try to go to sleep.” - -Professor Baffin was silent for a moment. Then he said,-- - -“Tilly, do you mean to say you never heard of Baron Bors?” - -“Never.” - -“And that you were never engaged to Sir Dinadan?” - -“Pa, how absurd! Who are these people?” - -“Were you not upon the island with me, at the castle?” - -“How could we have gone upon an island, pa, when we were taken from the -raft by the ship?” - -“Tilly, my child, when I get perfectly well I shall have to tell you of -the most extraordinary series of circumstances that has come under my -observation during the whole course of my existence!” - -Then Professor Baffin closed his eyes and fell into a doze, and -Miss Baffin went up to tell the surgeon of the ship _Undine_, from -Philadelphia to Glasgow, that her father seemed to be getting better. - - - - -THE CITY OF BURLESQUE: - -An Account of some of the Inhabitants Thereof. - - -CHAPTER I. - - THE COWDRICKS.--A CONJUGAL CHAT.--LEONIE.--A RISING ARTIST.--A - PROPOSAL.--SWEETHEARTS. - -Occupying a very comfortable position in an easy-chair, Mr. Cowdrick, -banker, sat in his library before a blazing fire. - -The Fate that arranges coincidences, and provides for the fitness -of things, could not have persuaded Mr. Cowdrick to choose a more -characteristic method of warming himself; for it was a sham fire. Some -skilful worker in clay had produced a counterfeit presentment of a heap -of logs, with the bark, the bits of moss, the knots, and the drops of -sap exuding from the ends, all admirably imitative of nature. But the -logs were hollow, and a hidden pipe, upon occasion, filled them with -gas, which, as it escaped through imperceptible holes, was ignited, to -burn as though it fed upon the inconsumable logs. - -The library room was handsomely decorated in accordance with the -prevailing modes. Upon the wall were fastened porcelain plates, -bearing beautiful designs, but wholly useless for the purpose for -which plates were originally devised. Mr. Cowdrick realized that as a -mere matter of reason it would be as sensible to put a fireplace in -the ceiling, or to cover his library table with the door-mat, as to -adorn his wall with a dinner-plate; but, like some of the rest of us -Mr. Cowdrick surrendered his private convictions to the suggestions of -fashion. - -Upon Mr. Cowdrick’s shelves and mantels were cups and saucers of -curious wares, which were to be looked at and not used; and in -his cabinets were jugs and bottles, which existed that they might -contribute to the pleasure of the eye rather than to the pleasure of -the palate. The bookcases, made with the best art of the workman, after -the most approved designs, were filled with richly-bound volumes, into -which Mr. Cowdrick had never cared to look since he bought them by the -cubic foot; and which, in some instances, considered themes which would -not have interested the banker in the slightest degree, even if he had -examined them, and had been gifted with the capacity to comprehend them. - -Upon the mantel ticked a clock, so fine that it had to be kept under -glass, and which had never been known to indicate the time correctly -during twenty-four consecutive hours. The chairs and the sofas -were made of material so costly that Mrs. Cowdrick had them draped -continually in closely-fitting brown-linen covers, so that, in fact, -it was somewhat difficult to comprehend why the expensive and delicate -fabrics beneath should have been employed at all, seeing that they were -perpetually doomed to hide their loveliness. - -Mr. Cowdrick sat looking at the deceitful fire in front of him, and -as he mused he smoked an excellent cigar. His reverie was presently -disturbed by the entrance of Mrs. Cowdrick to the room. Mrs. Cowdrick -was a woman in middle life, of rounded figure and pleasing face; and -she was clad, at this moment, in rich and tasteful dress. She held in -her hand a bit of canvas, upon which she was working, in worsted, a -pattern which was intended to convey to the observer the impression -that it was of Japanese origin; but really it was as great a sham as -Mr. Cowdrick’s fire. - -Mrs. Cowdrick drew a chair near to that of her husband. Her first act, -when she had taken her seat, was to clap her hands vigorously together -two or three times, in ineffectual efforts to catch and to crush a -fluttering moth-fly. - -This is a form of exercise that is very dear to the female heart, -but rarely is it productive of any practical results. Calculated in -horse-powers, it may fairly be estimated that the amount of force -expended annually by the sex upon the work of annihilating moth-flies -would be sufficient to raise one pound two hundred thousand feet high, -if any one cared to have a pound at such an elevation; while it is -probable that the number of moth-flies actually taken upon the wing -within the boundaries of civilization, does not in any one year exceed -a few hundreds. - -When she had concluded her efforts, without at all injuring the insect, -Mrs. Cowdrick resumed her worsted attempt to insult Japanese art, and, -as she did so, Mr. Cowdrick, turning his head about lazily, as he sent -a whiff of smoke into the air, said,-- - -“Annie, dear, where is Leonie?” - -“She is in her room, I think,” replied Mrs. Cowdrick, pleasantly. “She -will be down in a few moments.” - -“I wish to have a little talk with you about her, my love,” said Mr. -Cowdrick. “I have been thinking that it is high time Leonie had found a -husband. Let me see; how old is she now?” - -“In her twenty-ninth year, really,” replied Mrs. Cowdrick; “but then, -you know, she does not acknowledge more than twenty-five years to her -friends. Leonie is an exceedingly prudent girl.” - -“But, of course,” remarked Mr. Cowdrick, “she cannot keep that up -forever. As she grows older she will have to allow a year or two, every -now and then; and, after a while, you know, people will begin to count -for themselves.” - -“I have urged that upon her,” said Mrs. Cowdrick, “and I think she -fully realizes it. Her hair is becoming thinner every week, and there -would be no hope of her hiding the truth if the fashion did not permit -her easily to cover the bald place upon the top of her head.” - -“She is no longer the young girl she once was,” said Mr. Cowdrick with -an air of sadness which seemed to indicate his disappointment at the -refusal of Time to make an exception in the case of Leonie. - -“No,” said Mrs. Cowdrick; “she is beginning to ascertain that she -has nerves, and she has to take iron every morning. At the pic-nic -in September she tried to appear as girlish as she could; but I -noticed, while she was skipping the rope with those little chits of -Mrs. Parker’s, that she would catch her breath convulsively every time -she went up; and you know she was in bed with lumbago for three days -afterward.” - -“She must marry,” said Mr. Cowdrick, with emphasis. “The case is -getting desperate. I will speak to her about it to-night. I wish her, -before I quit home, to have herself engaged to some one who is able to -support her handsomely.” - -“How soon will it be necessary for you to fly?” asked Mrs. Cowdrick. - -“Before the end of next week, at the very latest. Matters are fast -approaching a crisis at the bank. We might have pulled through after -the failure of Snell and Adam, to whom, as one of the directors was -a partner, we lent a large sum upon bogus collateral; and I did -not despair even when Pinyard, Moon and Company, with whom I had a -silent interest, went under just after obtaining that last hundred -thousand of us; but I heard to-day that J. P. Hunn and Co. are very -much embarrassed, and as we have hypothecated some good collaterals -deposited with us by our best customers in order to keep Hunn on his -legs, his failure will inevitably result in the exposure of the whole -business.” - -“And how much, dear, is the bank short?” asked Mrs. Cowdrick, kindly. - -“A full million and a quarter at the lowest estimate. We can’t tell -exactly, because the accounts have been so much falsified to hide the -deficiency. But the capital has gone, and with it the bulk of the money -belonging to the depositors; and as I say, a whole lot of collateral -securities, placed in our hands by some of the best men in town. It’s a -bad business! They will make it hot for us, I am afraid.” - -“But then, dear, you will save something from the wreck, you said?” - -“Oh, yes! Pinyard told me that he thought he and I would come out with -two or three hundred thousand apiece, if we can manage the creditors -of his firm so that they will take twenty-five per cent. of their -claims in settlement. That, however, is only a possibility.” - -“If the crash is coming so soon,” said Mrs. Cowdrick, with a thoughtful -air, “there are some little things I should like to get at once.” - -“What are they?” - -“Why, you know, Henry, I want a sealskin sacque for this winter, and -I had thought of buying a pair of plain diamond earrings. Couldn’t -I get them, say to-morrow, and have them charged, and then let the -dealers just come in with the rest of your creditors when you arrange a -settlement?” - -“Certainly, my love! get them immediately, of course. It is your last -chance. I have not yet gotten into such a position that I cannot -provide comforts for my family! Tell Leonie to make any little -purchases she may need, also. I might as well go to ruin for a large -amount as for a small one. A few hundreds more or less will not matter.” - -As Mr. Cowdrick spoke, Leonie entered the room. She was elegantly and -fashionably dressed, and her face was wreathed with smiles. She ran -up to her father as a child might have done, and with a girlish laugh -kissed him; then, drawing a footstool close to him, she sat down beside -him and placed her arm upon his knee. Mr. Cowdrick stroked her head -affectionately, with a tenderness that was partly induced by fondness -and partly by a recollection of what Mrs. Cowdrick had said of Leonie’s -method of disguising the bare place upon her crown. - -After reflecting for a moment in silence, Mr. Cowdrick said,-- - -“I want to ask my little girl if she has lost her heart to any one yet?” - -Leonie blushed, and straightening herself up she said nervously, but -with traces of a smile about her lips,-- - -“Lost my heart, papa! What do you mean?” - -“I mean, my dear child, that it is high time you had obtained a husband -and settled yourself for life. It is important you should marry as -speedily as possible.” - -“Oh, papa!” said Leonie, hiding her face in her hands. - -“To speak plainly, darling,” said Mr. Cowdrick, “your poor father’s -affairs are in such a condition that a judicious matrimonial alliance -is almost necessary to your future happiness. You understand me, of -course; I am not at all sure of my financial future.” - -“I am very sorry,” said Leonie. - -“Of course you are,” replied Mr. Cowdrick, “but being sorry is not -enough. I should bear the calamity, when it comes, much more bravely if -I were assured that my dear child had a good and affluent husband to -console her amid the troubles that will befall her family. Is there no -one to whom you could give your affection if you tried? If you tried -right hard, just to please your poor old papa?” - -Leonie hesitated before answering, and then she said,-- - -“Yes, papa, there is!” - -“I am glad to hear that! Who is it, darling?” - -“You will not be angry with me, papa, if I tell you, will you? I _have_ -given my love to some one, and that some one is--is--Mr. Weems, the -artist!” - -“What!” exclaimed Mr. Cowdrick, in a voice that indicated mingled -surprise and indignation. “Not Julius Weems, the painter?” - -“You don’t mean to say you are actually engaged to be married to that -young man?” said Mrs. Cowdrick, vehemently. - -“Yes, I am engaged to him,” said Leonie, putting her forehead down upon -the arm of her father’s chair. “He proposed to me on Tuesday, while you -were at the opera.” - -“And you love him?” asked Mr. Cowdrick. - -“Oh, yes,” replied Leonie, “I love him; of course I love him, or I -never would have accepted him. But I don’t mean to say, positively and -finally, that I would refuse a better chance if it presented itself. -Julius is the only person who seems likely to want me, and certainly he -is a great deal better than nobody.” - -“Yes; but, my dear child,” observed Mr. Cowdrick, “a mere husband is -nothing. The circumstances of the husband are everything.” - -“And Mr. Weems is poor as poverty,” added Mrs. Cowdrick. - -“Oh, no, mamma, you are mistaken,” said Leonie. “Julius is in very -comfortable circumstances. He has a very profitable business.” - -“He has, has he?” said Mr. Cowdrick. “Well, I can’t imagine where it -can be. I never have seen any of his pictures.” - -“Why, papa,” rejoined Leonie with a slight laugh. “Julius says that you -have two of his best works in your gallery.” - -“I have,” exclaimed Mr. Cowdrick, in astonishment. “I think not.” - -“He says so, at any rate.” - -“Which are they?” - -“Why, the ‘Leader and the Swan,’ by Correggio, and the ‘St. Lawrence,’ -by Titian.” - -“Leonie, that is ridiculous,” said Mr. Cowdrick, warmly. - -“Perfectly absurd,” remarked Mrs. Cowdrick. - -“But Julius declares he really did paint them. He says he paints -nothing but ‘old masters’; that they bring the best prices, and that -there is always an active demand for them. He wants me to come to his -studio to see a splendid Murillo he has just finished. He is making -money rapidly.” - -“In that case, Leonie,” said Mr. Cowdrick, with a slight touch of -bitterness, as he thought of the prices he had paid for his Correggio -and his Titian, but with a certain cheerfulness, gained from his -suddenly formed resolution to realize on them to-morrow--“in that case, -we must regard Mr. Weems differently. He appears at least to be an -enterprising young man, and possibly he may do well.” - -“You had better arrange to see him at once, dear,” said Mrs. Cowdrick, -“so that you can ascertain what his income is, and how soon the wedding -can be arranged.” - -“I will do so,” replied Mr. Cowdrick. “But my child, did you tell him -anything? Does he know that you have already been engaged three times? -Does he know that you were affianced to old Mr. Baxter, who gained your -affection under the pretence that he was a millionaire, only to tread -upon the holiest of your emotions with the scandalous revelation that -he was living upon a paltry pension?” - -“No, papa, I did not think it worth while to disturb Julius with such -matters as that. What does he care for my past? No more than I care for -his!” - -“Do you think he suspects your age, dear?” asked Mrs. Cowdrick. - -“I am certain he does not. You know I falsified the date in the -family Bible, and last evening I got him to look over it with me, -under pretense of searching for a text. When I showed him the record, -laughingly, he pretended to be surprised. He said he should never have -supposed me to be a day over twenty-three.” - -Mr. Cowdrick slowly winked that one of his eyes which was upon the side -towards his wife, and then he said,-- - -“Well, Leonie, we will see about it. There are some things about the -match to recommend it, although I cannot say Weems is precisely the man -I should have chosen for you. However, you are the person who is most -deeply interested, and I suppose we must let you choose for yourself. -I wish you would ask Mr. Weems to call to see me to-morrow evening -concerning the matter.” - -“He will be here to-night, papa,” replied Leonie. “He said he would -call to make a formal proposal for my hand.” - -“Very well; that will do nicely. The sooner we reach a distinct -understanding, the better.” - -Before many moments had elapsed, Mr. Julius Weems was announced by the -servant, whereupon Mrs. Cowdrick and Leonie withdrew. When Mr. Weems -entered the room, Mr. Cowdrick greeted him politely, but with dignified -gravity. Mr. Weems was somewhat nervous. Mr. Cowdrick clearly perceived -that he had reduced himself to a condition of misery with a resolution -to obtain, if possible during this visit, the paternal blessing upon -his proposed alliance with Leonie. - -The current theory is that the most difficult of the processes by -which the state of marriage is approached, is the first declaration -of affection to the object of it; and it may be possible that most -men, upon reviewing their conduct upon such occasions, are inclined to -believe that they made fools of themselves. But, as a matter of fact, -it is nearly certain that those who make a careful survey of their -experiences will be likely to admit that the most trying ordeal through -which the lover is compelled to go is that of ascertaining what opinion -of the matter is held by the father of his sweetheart. If there is -a reasonable certainty that the loved one will accept him, he is at -least sure of the most acute and delicious sympathy when he summons up -courage enough to take her little hand in his and to give voice to his -feelings; and the difference of sex enables the performance to assume -the most romantic aspect. But to face a cold, practical man of the -world with a lot of sentiment, and to plunge boldly into an explanation -to him of a fervid passion which he regards in the prosiest fashion -possible, requires bravery of a very high order. And the man who can -approach such a task with perfect self-possession, and positive command -of his mental faculties and of his utterance, has a nervous system that -ordinary men may envy. - -For a moment after Mr. Weems seated himself upon the other side of the -fireplace from Mr. Cowdrick, there was an embarrassing silence. Then -Mr. Cowdrick, to open the way for his visitor, remarked that it had -been a very disagreeable day. - -“Very,” said Mr. Weems. “Uncommonly damp and chilly, even for this time -of year.” - -“Yesterday was far from pleasant also,” observed Mr. Cowdrick. - -“Wasn’t it abominable?” replied Mr. Weems. “There will be a great deal -of sickness if this kind of weather continues.” - -“The prospect,” rejoined Mr. Cowdrick, “is that it will. There are no -signs of a clear day to-morrow.” - -“I’m afraid not,” returned Mr. Weems. - -Then Mr. Cowdrick looked into the fire, and relapsed into silence. -The weather of the past, the present, and the future having been -considered, there really seemed to be nothing more to be said upon that -particular topic. It would be curious to ascertain what men, who are in -a stress for something to talk about, fall back upon in those regions -where there is steadfast sunshine during half of every year, and -unremitting rain during the other half. - -“How is Miss Leonie?” said Mr. Weems, suddenly, and with an air of -desperation. - -“Quite well, thank you,” answered Mr. Cowdrick. - -“Well, Mr. Cowdrick, I called this evening to speak to you about her,” -continued Weems, with a determination to make the plunge and have it -over. - -“Indeed!” - -“Yes, sir. In fact, Mr. Cowdrick, your daughter has consented to become -my wife, and I wish to obtain, if I may, your approval of the match. -May I have it?” - -“Really, Mr. Weems, this is so unexpected. I was so little prepared -for such an announcement that I hardly know what----. My answer would -depend somewhat upon circumstances, I may say, I have no objection -to you personally; but I know nothing of your prospects in your -profession.” - -“They are first-rate. I sold a picture to-day for five thousand -dollars; and that is by no means an infrequent occurrence.” - -“Who bought it?” - -“St. Cadmus’s church. It is an altar piece; very handsome and old; -by Michael Angelo. You see, I give you my secret; in confidence, of -course.” - -“Yes,” said Mr. Cowdrick, “I am a regular attendant at St. Cadmus’s -and I was one of four subscribers for that picture. The balance of the -amount we made up by mortgaging the organ. Mr. Tunicle, the incumbent, -said it was indisputably genuine.” - -“Oh, well,” said Mr. Weems, laughing; “if it looks like a genuine one, -and everybody thinks it is genuine, what difference is there? The -people are every bit as happy as if it were real. If one of my pictures -sells better with the name of some old chap who has been dead for two -or three centuries tagged to it, why shouldn’t I let it go in that way? -It does not hurt him, and it helps me.” - -“From your point of view the theory is excellent; but from mine, as the -owner of a couple of old masters, it looks a little thin.” - -“Well, to be fair,” said Mr. Weems, “I acknowledge that I painted -those you have, but I am willing to find you a market for them, to -oblige you; or I will sell you two or three more, if you prefer it. -I have just run off a fine Salvator Rosa, and a Titian, as kind of -‘pot-boilers,’ and you can have them for almost nothing if you want -them.” - -“Thank you, no,” said Mr. Cowdrick. “My interest in art is gradually -cooling off. And then, besides, if you are going to turn out pictures -every time you want a suit of clothes, or a box of cigars, it seems -likely there will soon be a glut of old masters in the market.” - -“But to come back to the point, Mr. Cowdrick,” said Mr. Weems. “What -may I accept as your decision respecting my claim to your daughter’s -hand?” - -“Have you ever had an affair of this kind before, Mr. Weems? Pardon me -for asking. Is Leonie your first love?” - -“Well, you know, every man does foolish things in his youth. I have -been involved in one or two trifling matters of the sort. But I am a -careful man, and to avoid any unpleasant demonstrations in the future, -I have procured formal decrees of divorce from eleven different girls; -all, in fact, with whom I have ever had any acquaintance that was at -all sentimental. I obtained six decrees from the State of Indiana, at -a cost of ten dollars apiece, and the remainder from Utah, at a little -higher rate.” - -“And you were never married to any of the parties?” - -“Oh, no! merely knew them; took them out driving, or danced with them -at balls. Some of them are married to other men. But, you know, a -man is never certain what may happen; women are so queer; and so I -concluded to destroy all the chances of anything turning up, and I have -the legal documents to show for it. Leonie’s happiness is perfectly -safe with me, I assure you.” - -“Your course seems to me a prudent one, at any rate,” remarked Mr. -Cowdrick; “but then, of course, it is possible for a man to be a little -too far-sighted for the comfort of other people. How do I know, for -instance, that you haven’t taken the precaution to file away among your -papers a divorce from Leonie?” - -“Oh, well,” said Mr. Weems, laughing, “you know I wouldn’t go quite -that far. I admit that I have half a dozen blank decrees, which I can -fill up to meet emergencies, but I pledge you my word of honor that I -will never put her name in one. I love her too dearly.” - -“Do you believe you would love her if she were poor; or if she were to -become poor?” - -“Yes, certainly; of course,” answered Mr. Weems. And then he added -mentally, “I wonder if anything is the matter? I’ll inquire about the -old man’s financial standing the first thing in the morning.” - -“Well,” said Mr. Cowdrick, “I hardly know. Leonie is very dear to me. I -have not contemplated an early marriage for her. It would be a terrible -wrench upon my heartstrings. What would you do if I refused my consent?” - -“Try to submit with what patience I could command, I suppose. But you -will not refuse, will you?” - -Mr. Cowdrick did not respond at once. He had rather cherished the hope -that Weems would elope with Leonie, and save him the expense of a -wedding outfit and of a wedding festival, besides relieving him of all -responsibility. But he saw now that it would not be safe to take the -chances. - -“Well, Mr. Weems,” he said, at length, “so far as I am concerned, I -think I may say that if Leonie wishes to marry you, she can. But we -must ask her mother about it. It will be a terrible shock to poor Mrs. -Cowdrick. I will call her in.” - -When Mrs. Cowdrick entered the room with Leonie, Mr. Cowdrick said,-- - -“My dear, Mr. Weems, here, has formally proposed for the hand of -Leonie, and I have given my consent, provided you also would do so.” - -Mrs. Cowdrick replied by a shriek, after which she flung herself into -a chair, and, with an expensive handkerchief to her face, she sobbed -hysterically. - -“Ma is doing that to show how well she can pose,” said Leonie, in a -whisper to Weems. “She used to be splendid in private theatricals.” - -Mrs. Cowdrick sprang up, and in tones of apparently intense excitement -she said,--“No, no! I cannot let her go! It is impossible! It is so -unexpected, so sudden! My child, my poor, darling child! To be torn -ruthlessly from the arms of her dear mother! I cannot bear it! It will -kill me!” and Mrs. Cowdrick flung her arms wildly about Leonie and wept. - -Leonie seemed quite calm. She lowered her shoulder slightly, to incline -her mother’s head, so that her tears would fall upon the floor instead -of upon her dress. - -Mr. Cowdrick comforted her, reasoned with her, and showed her that, -after all, Leonie’s happiness was at stake. To promote her happiness, -her parents must be willing to make some sacrifices, and she must try -to brace herself to meet the trial, hard as it was. Mrs. Cowdrick’s -agitation gradually decreased, as her husband spoke; and when she had -rested upon the sofa for a moment, and helped her nerves by inhaling -salts from a gilded smelling-bottle, she said: - -“If it must be, it must! Take her, Julius! Take her, and love her, -and cherish her, so that she will never rue having been torn from the -parental nest!” - -“I promise you faithfully to do my best,” replied Mr. Weems. - -“And now, my children,” said Mr. Cowdrick, as his voice trembled with -emotion, “I give you an old man’s blessing! May you be happy in each -other’s love until life shall end!” - -Then Mr. Cowdrick wiped his eyes, and taking Mrs. Cowdrick on his arm, -they went upstairs to discuss some method by which the marriage could -be celebrated before the crash came at the bank. - -“And you are mine at last, darling!” said Mr. Weems, as he pushed his -chair up close to Leonie’s and took her hand in his. - -In reply she nestled her head up against his shoulder, and her -thoughts went out dreamily over the past. Old Mr. Baxter and her two -other lovers had made precisely the same remark to her under similar -circumstances, and she had responded to them in the same manner. Life -is an endless round of repetitions. - -“Sweet face!” said Mr. Weems, patting it tenderly, as if he were a -trifle uncertain of the permanent nature of the color. “Did you know, -darling, that I put your face in one of my recent pictures?” - -“Oh, Julius! Did you?” - -“Yes, dear, I gave it to my full length of St. Ethelberta, by Rubens.” - -“Is it a good likeness?” - -“I think it is. But,” said Mr. Weems thoughtfully, “it didn’t sell! -That is, I mean, no person of really good taste has inspected it yet.” - -“And you painted it because you loved me, did you?” - -“Oh, yes! Certainly! Of course!” - -“How fortunate it was that I could return your love, wasn’t it? Julius, -what would you have done if I had refused you?” - -“Done? Why, it would have mortified me dreadfully. I don’t believe I -should have had any appetite for a week or more.” - -“Some disappointed lovers,” said Leonie almost reproachfully, and with -an air of chagrin, “become utterly desperate and try to take their own -lives.” - -“Oh, I know,” replied Mr. Weems. “Dreadful, isn’t it? But I generally -try to bear up under misery. It’s a duty.” - -“Could you bear misery for my sake, Julius? Do you think your love -would endure if poverty should overtake us? Bitter, blinding poverty?” - -“I am sure I could,” replied Mr. Weems with a renewed determination to -discover in the morning if Mr. Cowdrick’s credit had been impaired. - -“You believe, then, that love in a cottage is a possibility, do you, -dear?” asked Leonie. - -“Yes, darling; possible, but not fascinating. My observation is that -love, upon the whole, has a better chance in a commodious mansion with -all of the modern conveniences; with gas, water and a boy to answer -the front-door bell. Love, darling, is like some other things in this -world--it thrives better when it is comfortable.” - -“Have you thought about our wedding, dear?” asked Leonie. “Where will -we go upon our wedding journey? Wouldn’t it be splendid to take a trip -to Europe?” - -The suggestion did not seem to excite any great amount of enthusiasm -in the heart of Mr. Weems. He said: “It would be very nice, but I am -afraid it would be almost too expensive, unless your pa--Did your pa -say anything about it?” asked Julius, with a faint expectation that -Mr. Cowdrick may have intended to include a handsome cheque among the -presents. - -“No,” replied Leonie; “he said nothing. Only I thought may-be you might -want to go.” - -“So I do, my love, but business is a trifle dull just now. I am afraid -we shall have to wait until the prevailing prejudice against Rubens and -St. Ethelberta blows over, as it were. I thought perhaps we might make -a short trip to Boston and back. How would that suit you?” - -“I would be satisfied with it, dear, of course,” said Leonie. - -Mr. Weems heard her answer with the serene consciousness that he had -a free pass for two over that particular route, and that even upon a -wedding journey there would be no need to be actually riotous in the -matter of hotel expenses. - -“And when we get home, and settle down, may I keep a parrot, Julius?” - -“Well,” replied Mr. Weems, “the question is sudden and somewhat -irrelevant, but I should think you might; provided, of course, you -selected one that has not been taught to use profane language, and to -imitate a screeching wheelbarrow with too great accuracy.” - -“You are so kind! And, Julius?” - -“What, sweet?” - -“If papa should die, could dear mamma come to live with us?” - -“I’ll tell you what, Leonie, suppose we postpone the consideration of -some of these distressing contingencies until they actually present -themselves! I am perfectly willing to wrestle with a grief when it -comes, but there is no use of putting crape on a door-knocker until -there is bereavement in the family circle.” - -“That is true, dear. And, Julius?” - -“Well, my love?” - -“Whenever you can’t come to see me, will you write to me? I want you to -send me, at least once every day, a dear, kind, affectionate letter, -full of love; won’t you, dear?” - -“I will, if you will promise faithfully to burn them,” replied Julius, -as his prudent mind grasped the possibility of some unfortunate future -misunderstanding, in which ardent love-letters might have a damaging -effect upon the case of the defendant. “That is, pretty nearly every -day.” - -“Thus far,” continued Leonie, “I have kept all that you have written. -I have read them over, and over, and over, and kissed them again and -again. The sweet verses you have sent to me I have learned by heart.” - -“Have you, darling?” said Mr. Weems, with a feeling of pride in his -success as a poet. - -“Shall I repeat them to you?” - -“If you will, dearest,” replied Mr. Weems, with the air of a man who -was conscious that he had turned off rather a good thing in the way of -verses. - -“Let me see,” said Leonie, leaning back in her chair, “how do they -begin? Oh, yes!” - - ‘Sweetheart, if I could surely choose - The aptest word in passion’s speech, - And all its subtlest meaning use - With eloquence, your soul to teach, - Still, forced by its intensity, - Sweetheart, my love would voiceless be. - - ‘Sweetheart, though all the days and hours - Sped by, with love in sharpest stress, - To find some reach of human powers - Its faintest impulse to express; - Till Time merged in Eternity, - Sweetheart, my love would voiceless be.’ - -“Are they not beautiful?” asked Leonie, as she concluded. - -“Very beautiful,” responded Mr. Weems, with a faint impression that -it might perhaps pay him to abandon the old masters, and to grasp the -resounding lyre, with a resolution to thrum it during the remainder of -his life. - -“‘Sweetheart’ is a name I always liked,” said Leonie. “You called me -your ‘rosebud,’ in your last letter; but somehow it did not please me -so much as ‘sweetheart;’ it was not so natural.” - -“Twenty-five years _is_ old for a rosebud,” said Mr. Weems, absently. - -“Yes,” replied Leonie; “and does it not seem odd, Julius, that we who -have been apart so long should now be united forever, and that we -should go down the current of time together until the end?” - -While she was speaking, the elegant clock, from beneath its crystal -covering, chimed out the hour of _four_, and the artist, consulting his -watch, discovered that the correct time was precisely ten minutes past -eleven. He arose from his seat, and fondly embracing Leonie, he kissed -her, and bade her good night. She went to the window, and as, by the -light of the street lamp, she saw him descending the steps in front of -the house, she waved her hand toward him. Then turning, she proceeded -to the hall, and up the stairs to bed, murmuring to herself,-- - -“Burn them! That _would_ be insane!” - - -CHAPTER II. - - SAINT CADMUS’S.--CHURCH MATTERS OF IMPORTANCE.--FATHER KRUM AND - FATHER TUNICLE.--A RIOTOUS SERVICE. - -Mr. Cowdrick, although making no profession of a special fondness for a -religious life, was one of the pillars of St. Cadmus’s Church. He had -been elected to a place in the vestry; he held two pews; he contributed -upon occasion to the Church fund; and Rev. Mr. Tunicle, who was “an -advanced Ritualist,” found in Mr. Cowdrick an ardent supporter whenever -he undertook to introduce innovations in his method of conducting the -services. - -It did not seem important to Mr. Cowdrick that Mr. Tunicle should -always try to produce from the records of the early Church his -authority for any new and surprising practice that he wished to adopt. -If the thing seemed to Mr. Cowdrick good in itself, if it pleased his -eye, and gratified what he chose to consider the æsthetic demands of -his nature, he deemed it unnecessary to ask any more questions. He -would as soon have thought of inquiring, before he bought a new chair -for his library, or a new set of plate for his table, whether his -grandfather had established any precedent in the matter of the purchase -of chairs and dishes, as to have sought in ecclesiological history -warrant for the embellishment of the services at St. Cadmus’s. It was -enough that the worshipers who had the most money, and who were able to -pay for novelties, wanted them. - -Mr. Tunicle, or Father Tunicle, as his most enthusiastic admirers -called him, was a frequent visitor at the house of Mr. Cowdrick. Not -only did he find there a great deal of sympathy with his plans, but he -liked the society of Leonie, and he was exceedingly anxious to enlist -her among the active workers in the church. - -He called upon Leonie one evening, shortly after her betrothal to Mr. -Weems; and as the artist happened to be out of town, Father Tunicle had -an opportunity to enjoy some uninterrupted conversation with the young -lady. - -“I noticed last Sunday, Father Tunicle,” said Leonie, after some -preliminary conversation, “that you did not use the velvet sermon-cover -I worked for you. I hope you are pleased with it?” - -“Oh yes, delighted with it. But then, you know, I couldn’t use it last -Sunday. The color for the Third Sunday after Epiphany is green, and -the sermon cover you know, is violet. I can use it on Septuagesima -Sunday, of course. We cannot be too particular about these things in a -world that is lying in wickedness.” - -“Oh, excuse me,” said Leonie. “I had gotten the idea, somehow, that -violet was the morning color for last Sunday, and red the evening -color.” - -“You are thinking of Quinquagesima Sunday, Miss Cowdrick,” said Father -Tunicle, smiling gravely. “The color changes upon that day. You must -study more carefully the little almanac I gave you. When the Church -provides us with good books which may guide us to lives of earnest -devotion, it is our duty to read them attentively.” - -“I will promise to do better in the future,” said Leonie, meekly. - -“I ought to tell you also,” continued Father Tunicle, “that I could not -use the Lavabo you worked for me, at all.” - -“Indeed! Why?” - -“Why, instead of making it of plain linen, you made it of damask, and -you embroidered it with silk; whereas everything but French red marking -cotton or white marking cotton is expressly prohibited by the rules. -Nothing in the almanac is stated in plainer terms than this. St. Paul, -you know, insisted that things should be done decently and in order, -and we are bound to heed his injunction.” - -“Ah, Father Tunicle, I am afraid I neglect St. Paul as much as I do my -almanac. Will you believe I really didn’t know that he says anything -about plain linen and French red marking cotton? I plead guilty.” - -“No, Miss Cowdrick, you misunderstand me. I did not mean to indicate -that the apostle is the authority for these things. Unhappily he does -not allude to them. Whether he ought to have done so, is another -question. Our authority for them is more recent, but it is not to be -despised upon that account.” - -“Of course not.” - -“I have great difficulty in impressing the importance of these things -upon the minds of some of our people. Despite my repeated injunctions, -Mrs. Battersby brought back from the laundry the altar-cloth filled -with starch, and in the midst of my distress over the discovery of this -sacrilege, I perceived that the sexton had omitted to pin the fringe -to the super-frontal. If we are to be made perfect through suffering, -I feel that I am not far from perfection, unless these distressing -occurrences shall cease.” - -“It is terrible,” said Leonie, with tender sympathy in her voice. - -“By the way, Miss Cowdrick,” said the pastor, “to turn to pleasanter -themes. Cannot I enlist your more active interest in our church work? -Will you not come into the Sunday-school as a teacher?” - -“I am not competent to teach, I fear.” - -“We can give you a class of girls or a class of boys, as you prefer. -The boys’ class, which is named, ‘Little Lambs of the Flock,’ is, I -fear, somewhat too unruly for you. Miss Bunner gave it up because the -scholars would persist in pinching each other and quarrelling during -the lesson. They are so rough and boisterous that I think it will be -better to get a male teacher to manage them. But you could take the -girls’ class, ‘The Zealous Workers,’ and perhaps persuade the pupils to -surrender their present indifference to everything that is being done -in either the Sunday-school or the church.” - -“I will consider the matter, and let you have my answer as speedily as -possible,” replied Leonie. - -“Do, please. And I must speak to your father again about my assistant, -Father Krum. He is not in sympathy with me, and it would be better for -both of us if he could be removed.” - -“It is so unfortunate,” said Leonie. - -“I have told him repeatedly that his stole must always match the color -of the frontal of the altar; but you perhaps noticed last Sunday that -he came in with a black stole, and, of course, with a green frontal, -all hope of a harmonious combination of colors was gone. It spoiled the -entire service for me.” - -“For me too,” said Leonie. - -“Sometimes I think Krum is wilfully perverse and obstinate. Upon -several recent occasions he has read the Epistle upon the Gospel side, -and the Gospel upon the Epistle side, and when I remonstrated with him, -after church, he was positively offensive. He said that if the people -only listened to the Scripture and heeded it, he couldn’t see why it -made any difference whether he stood upon one side or the other, or -balanced himself on top of the chancel rail. Scandalous, wasn’t it?” - -“Perfectly scandalous.” - -“He seems to take pleasure in destroying the effect of the finest -groupings that I arrange in the chancel with him and the acolytes; and -when I proposed to introduce an orchestra, led by Professor Batterini, -whom I should dress in a surplice, Krum had the insolence to say that -he did not believe that there was any use of trying to preach the -Gospel to the poor with a brass band. The man seems to be lost to all -sense of reverence.” - -“Entirely lost,” said Leonie. - -“And as for praying to the east, that he appears determined not to -do. Of course, with the incorrect orientation of the church, we have -only a ‘supposititious east,’ and Krum insists that if I have a right -to suppose the north-northwest, I think it is, to be the east, he is -equally entitled to suppose the southwest or due south to be east, -and so he does as he pleases. When he said, the other day, that in -his opinion more depended upon the frame of mind in which the prayers -were said, than upon the particular point of the compass towards which -the supplications were presented, I did not answer him. Such a man is -almost beyond the reach of argument.” - -Mr. Cowdrick came in while Father Tunicle was speaking; and when the -good pastor had rehearsed his grievances to the banker, Mr. Cowdrick -said,-- - -“Father Krum’s conduct is subversive of good order and of authority; -and if he is allowed to continue he will demoralize the entire -congregation. He ought to remember what the Bible says about submitting -reverently to one’s pastors and spiritual masters. You are his pastor -and spiritual master. Isaiah, isn’t it, who says that?” - -“The quotation, though somewhat inexact,” replied Father Tunicle, “is -from the Catechism.” - -“Well, anyhow, he ought to do as you want him to do. That is what we -pay him for. And if he refuses to do it, he ought to be dismissed.” - -“That,” said Father Tunicle, “will be difficult to do while he has -at least half of the vestrymen with him. I am sorry to say that his -obstinacy is countenanced and approved by a number of the lay officers -of the church.” - -“Then we must use force!” exclaimed Mr. Cowdrick. “If we men who put -down our money to keep the church in operation cannot be allowed to do -as we please, we had better stop contributing. The people who pay for -spreading the glad tidings of the Gospel ought to be allowed to spread -them in their own way.” - -“Matters,” said Father Tunicle, “are fast approaching a point where -something will have to be done. Three times I have instructed Krum to -extend only three of his fingers when he pronounces absolution, but he -continues to hold out his entire hand, with all his fingers wide open. -The last time he did it I noticed that Mrs. Lindsay, who is one of our -party, got up and left the church in a rage.” - -“I saw her go out,” said Leonie. “That was the first Sunday upon which -she wore her purple velvet bonnet. Everybody was looking at her.” - -“If he does it again,” said Mr. Cowdrick, “I am in favor of shutting -the church doors against him and his friends. Peremptory action of some -kind becomes a necessity in cases like this.” - -After some further conversation relative to ecclesiastical and secular -matters, Father Tunicle took his leave, and went home, probing the deep -recesses of his mind, as he walked along, to find some plan by which -he might successfully overcome the resistance offered by the perverse -Father Krum to the evangelization of a fallen race. - -The next Sunday morning was bright and beautiful. The air was cold, -but the sun shone from a clear sky to tempt from their homes the -worshipers who, however willing to brave, on week-days, terrific storms -sent to keep them from shopping excursions and parties, have not nerve -enough upon Sundays to face a cloud no larger than a man’s hand. - -Those persons who, upon devotional errands intent, walked along the -footway near St. Cadmus’s church at the hour of morning prayer, -perceived that something of an unusual and exciting nature was in -progress in and about that purely Gothic edifice. The many whose -curiosity succeeded in overcoming their desire to be punctual in their -attendance at the sanctuary, paused to observe the proceedings. - -A crisis had been reached in the quarrel between Father Tunicle and -Father Krum. As the latter, in response to still another request -that he would extend but three fingers in his pronunciation of the -absolution, had positively, and indeed with vehemence, refused to -extend less than four, and had gone so far as to indicate that, under -serious provocation, he might even thrust out eight fingers and two -thumbs, Father Tunicle’s party had resolved that the time had come for -them to act. - -“It is a terrible thing to do,” said Father Tunicle; “but the blood of -the martyrs is the seed of the Church; and we must stand up boldly for -truth and right, though we die for it.” - -And so, upon that lovely Sunday morning, when dumb Nature herself -seemed to be trying to express, with the glory of her sunshine, and -with the pure beauty of her azure sky, her sense of the goodness of her -Creator, Father Tunicle and six of his vestrymen, reinforced by a few -earnest sympathizers, who were subsequently admitted through a side -door by a faithful sexton, took possession of the church. - -When Father Krum arrived, the faithful sexton, keeping watch and ward -at the aforesaid door, refused to let him in; and when the indignant -clergyman demanded a reason for his exclusion, the functionary informed -him that his reckless conduct in using four fingers and a thumb, -instead of the inferior number warranted by a strict regard for the -usages of the primitive Church, had persuaded Father Tunicle and his -partisans that, as a shepherd of the sheep, he was a lamentable and -dismal, not to say dangerous, failure. - -Then Father Krum, in a frame of mind that contained no suggestion -of Christian resignation, walked rapidly around to the front of the -church, where he found a group of persons, members of the congregation, -who were standing before a close-barred door, behind which, in the -vestibule, stood Father Tunicle and his adherents. While Father Krum, -in the mildest tones that he could command, and with a proper desire -not to produce any excitement, explained the situation to the crowd, -the six vestrymen who inclined to favor his views, in opposition to -those of Father Tunicle, came up, one after the other. - -They were taken completely by surprise, and felt they were at a -disadvantage. But after some preliminary discussion, they called Mr. -Krum aside, and began to consider with him what should be done. Mr. -Krum counselled a retreat. His voice was for peace. He urged that a -resort to violence at any time, but especially at such a time, would be -shocking. But the vestrymen did not agree with him. Mr. Yetts declared -that they had a right to enter the church, and that for officers of -the church with authority co-equal with theirs to deny that right, -was simply monstrous, and not to be endured. Mr. Palfrey, Mr. Green, -and the other vestrymen, expressed their full agreement with this -proposition. - -“But let us try peaceful means, at any rate,” said Mr. Krum. “I will -knock at the door.” - -He advanced and knocked. “Who is it?” said a voice from within. - -“It is Mr. Krum, six of the vestrymen, and a large portion of the -congregation. We wish to enter.” - -“Can’t do it,” replied the voice, which was that of the sexton, who had -advanced to the front, and had been thrown out upon the picket line in -the vestibule. - -“Where is Father Tunicle?” asked Mr. Krum. - -“He has just begun the service, and has gotten as far as ‘dearly -beloved brethren.’ My orders are that you can’t get in until he says -the apostolic benediction!” - -“Ask one of the vestrymen to come to the window for a moment, please,” -said Mr. Krum. - -Presently one of the front windows was raised to the height of two or -three inches, and Mr. Cowdrick peered through the wire netting that -protected it. - -“What do you want?” asked Mr. Cowdrick. - -“We wish to know,” said Mr. Yetts, “why we are excluded from this -church, and by whose authority?” - -“You are excluded,” said Mr. Cowdrick, “because we who pay the expenses -are determined to run the church in our own way. The door is shut by -our authority; by mine!” - -“Do you mean to say,” asked Mr. Krum, with much mildness, “that you -intend to try to make this exclusion permanent?” - -“Of course. We have possession and we intend to keep it. Hurry up if -you have anything to say; I want to go in and help swell the responses.” - -“See here, Cowdrick,” said Mr. Yetts, fiercely, “if you don’t open that -door, we will break it down. We’re not going to stand any more of this -nonsense.” - -“You’d better not try it,” replied Mr. Cowdrick. “I shall summon the -police to protect us if you do.” - -In response to this, Mr. Yetts advanced to the door and kicked it three -or four times, viciously. The crowd, which had swollen until it covered -the pavement and filled the street, laughed at this demonstration. Mr. -Cowdrick, behind the window netting, laughed also. Mr. Yetts, with -crimson face, retired in tolerably good order to consult with his -friends. Father Krum advised him to give it up. - -“Give it up!” exclaimed Mr. Yetts. “I’ll show you how I’ll give it up!” - -Then he and Mr. Green went around the corner for a little space, and -returned presently with a somewhat ponderous wooden beam. The four -other vestrymen manned it, and aimed it at the door. Bang! went the -end against the portal, which bravely withstood the shock. The crowd -cheered, and a dozen boys, who regarded the performance with delighted -interest, crowded up behind the assaulting column, and betrayed a -desire to give additional impetus to Mr. Yetts’ battering ram. - -The Krum section of the vestry made another charge, striking the door -with terrible force, but still failing to effect a breach. At this -moment one of Father Tunicle’s acolytes emerged from the side-door and -attempted to glide down the street in search of a policeman. He was -captured by one of the besieging force, and held as a prisoner. He -brought the news that Father Tunicle had stopped short in the service -when the first blow was struck against the door, and that the entire -garrison was now rallied in the vestibule, where they were fortifying -the portal with the baptismal font, the episcopal chair, some -Sunday-school benches, and a lectern. - -Mr. Krum remonstrated with Mr. Yetts, and entreated him not to proceed -any further. He urged that it was a dreadful thing for Christian men to -create such a disturbance upon the Sabbath-day. - -“I don’t know about that!” replied Mr. Yetts, who was now warm with -wrath and with excitement. “When Peter did wrong didn’t Paul ‘withstand -him to the face’?” - -“Yes; but, my dear Mr. Yetts, think of it! St. Paul did not try to -batter down the church door on a Sunday morning with a log of wood! You -are going too far!” - -“Times have changed since then,” said Mr. Yetts. “Paul probably never -encountered precisely such an emergency. Once more!” exclaimed Mr. -Yetts to the assailants. “Give it to ’em hard this time!” - -Seizing the beam, the vestrymen and their friends advanced once more -to the attack. Three times was the door smitten without effect, but -when the fourth blow was struck it gave way, and was flung wide open, -revealing Father Tunicle and his friends, standing amid a mass of -overturned and wrecked furniture, pale with rage and dismay, and ready -to defend with force the citadel which thus was exposed to the enemy. - -[Illustration: A RIOTOUS SERVICE.] - -The crowd sent up a shout of satisfaction, and the intrepid Yetts, with -his five vestrymen, regarded their triumph with exultation. - -What they would have done next, if they had been permitted to press -forward through the breach, can only be imagined. For a moment it -looked as if beneath that spire which idly pointed these men toward a -better country, whence rage and hatred and all evil passions are shut -out, and beneath the bell, whose function was to send vibrating through -the tremulous air its summons to the temple of the Prince of Peace, -there might be a hand-to-hand encounter, in which priest and people -should assail each other with furious violence. - -But, most happily, at this critical moment, a squad of policemen came -upon the scene, and entering the doorway, separated the combatants and -prevented any further demonstration. - -“Never mind!” exclaimed Mr. Yetts, shaking his fist at the Father -Tunicle faction. “We will go to law about it. We shall see who has a -right to use this church!” - -“As you please!” replied Mr. Sloper, one of the vestrymen who adhered -to Father Tunicle. “We will fight you to the last gasp!” - -And then both parties dispersed, leaving the church in charge of -the policemen, who closed the door, and took the key to the nearest -magistrate. - -Taken altogether, the day’s proceedings, regarded as the performance -of Christian gentlemen, citizens of a Christian country, upon the day -designated by Christianity as a day of peace and rest--as a day of -devotion to celestial and holy things, could hardly be regarded as -encouraging to those hopeful persons who cherish the theory that the -world is to be made better by illustrations of the excellence of the -advantages of pure religion. - - -CHAPTER III. - - MYSTERIOUS DISAPPEARANCE OF MR. COWDRICK.--THE “CRAB.”--“HEAR BOTH - SIDES.”--A SKELETON DISCOVERED.--A POWERFUL SERMON. - -Before another Sunday came, the community was shocked and startled -by the announcement that Mr. Cowdrick, the banker, had suddenly and -mysteriously disappeared. What had become of him nobody seemed to know. -Even Mrs. Cowdrick apparently did not know. The friends who promptly -called upon her, partly for the purpose of offering her their sympathy -and partly with an intent to gratify their curiosity, ascertained, -during the intervals of her hysterical spasms, that she cherished a -wild and rather incoherent theory that Mr. Cowdrick had been brutally -assassinated by some person and for some cause unknown. And this -theory obtained some acceptance for a time among amiable people, who -were disposed to take the most charitable view of the situation. But -the number of these speedily diminished when the newspapers, a day -or two later, revealed the result of an official examination of the -affairs of Mr. Cowdrick’s bank. The public then learned that that -financial institution was rotten through and through; that Mr. Cowdrick -and his partners in crime had not only used, for purposes of private -speculation, the money of the depositors, but that they had stolen -everything of value that had been committed to their care, and had left -the bank an absolute, hopeless wreck, and reduced the innocent and -unsuspicious stockholders to beggary. - -The public excitement, of course, was great. Mrs. Cowdrick’s friends -neglected her. The rich and influential De Flukes actually insulted her -by sending to recall an invitation to their reception that had been -sent to her. As if Mrs. Cowdrick could have attended the reception -at any rate! This was the cruellest thing of all, to Mrs. Cowdrick. -She broke down completely and went to bed, where Leonie waited upon -her to supply her with almost alarming quantities of camphor and -smelling-salts. - -As no traces of the fugitive could be found; as no one could testify -to having seen him leave the city; and as the detective force, after -following out without success any number of what they considered -excellent clues, appeared to have relapsed into a normal condition of -imbecility and indifference, the conclusion reached by many persons -was, that Cowdrick had destroyed himself; and the energetic and -enterprising coroner, McSorley, who had just been elected upon the -Democratic ticket, went to work to drag all the rivers and creeks and -ponds in the neighborhood. - -Colonel Hoker, the editor of the _Crab_, the leading daily paper, -advocated a dozen different theories in turn, and his indomitable -reporters not only secured early and accurate reports of the condition -of the bank, but they obtained expressions of opinion from at least -thirty eminent citizens who really knew no more about the matter than -other people, and they watched Cowdrick’s house so closely, and were so -successful in establishing confidential relations with the chambermaid, -that they were able to tell how often the doctor called to see Mrs. -Cowdrick, what quantity of reinvigorating drugs she consumed, how her -medicine agreed with her, and what she had every day for dinner. - -A country wherein a tyrant’s power is used to shackle the press, and to -rob it of freedom of utterance, does not know how much it misses. - -The uncertainty in which the fate of Mr. Cowdrick was involved, made it -exceedingly difficult for Colonel Hoker to discuss the bank sensation -in his editorial columns. If he could have felt sure that the unhappy -fugitive had really slain himself, the course of the Colonel would -have been clear; for then he could with safety have directed public -attention to the peculiar atrocity of the transactions at the bank; -he could have held the miserable offender up before the public eye -to point to him as an awful example to others, and especially to the -young, and he could have preached many eloquent sermons upon the text, -“Be sure your sins will find you out!” - -But while a chance remained that Cowdrick was still alive and might -return, the Colonel knew that it was the duty of persons upon whom it -devolved to form public opinion through the instrumentality of the -press, to be careful. He had learned from extended observation that -an absent offender who has been roughly used as a warning against -pursuance of the paths of vice, sometimes comes back, and, after -gaining possession of power and riches, manifests a disposition to make -things very uncomfortable for the eminent journalists who have used him -as a basis for their denunciations of sin. And so the Colonel discussed -the matter in the _Crab_ only in a general way; lamenting the loss -to the stockholders; expressing regret that “one of our most eminent -citizens should be, for a time at least, in some respects under a -cloud,” and urging that perhaps the disaster might fairly be attributed -to the spirit of wild speculation which seemed at times to animate -entire communities, rather than to a deliberate purpose to inflict -injury upon confiding and innocent persons. - -The dexterity displayed by Colonel Hoker, in keeping the _Crab_ in -such a nice position that while it apparently conceded much to public -sentiment and the requirements of morality, it yet left a very wide -margin for the contingency of Cowdrick’s vindication and restoration to -prosperity, was really marvellous. - -But the nicest ingenuity sometimes will not avail against accident, -or rather against that Fate which ordains catastrophe with ironical -contempt for human foresight. - -The Colonel was compelled to leave town for a few days, and in order to -make the _Crab_ entirely safe, he penned two editorial articles, one to -be used in the event of the discovery of Cowdrick’s dead body during -his absence, the other to be inserted if Cowdrick should return alive -to face his accusers and his fate. - -The former article ran in this wise:-- - - “THE WAY OF THE TRANSGRESSOR. - - “It has not often been our lot to present to our readers more - striking proof than that which is found in our columns to-day of - the fact that Satan makes hard bargains. It is now positively - ascertained that Cowdrick the swindler, forger and thief, driven - by desperation at the exposure of his awful crimes, and, let us - hope, for the sake of human nature, by the stings of a conscience - which could not hearken with indifference to the cries of the - widows and orphans reduced at one fell blow to beggary, took his - own life, and so ended a career of crime which honest men shrink - from contemplating. It is, perhaps, for the best, however much we - may regret that this wretched felon, burdened with guilt and shame, - should have robbed the law of its right to punish, and should have - gone into eternity unshriven, with the guilt of self-destruction - added to the mountain of sins for which already he was required to - give account. We shrink from discussion of the dreadful details - of this shocking and sickening tragedy; but it will not have been - enacted in vain if it shall seem to warn those who are tempted, as - this man was, to surrender honesty at the demand of greed, and to - permit the maddening thirst for gain to persuade them to trample in - the dust their obligations to society, to their families, and to - those who had given them their trust.” - -The second article pursued rather a different line of thought. It was -to the following effect:-- - - “A DEMAND FOR FAIR PLAY. - - “We take a great deal of pleasure in announcing that Henry P. - Cowdrick, Esq., the well-known banker, whose name has been before - the public for some days past in connection with some unpleasant, - but not yet positively authentic, rumors, has returned to the city - in the enjoyment of excellent health. It is understood that an - immediate further examination into the affairs of the bank will - be made with the assistance of Mr. Cowdrick, and we merely express - the general wish when we say that we hope to have some of the - transactions that have excited severest comment explained in such - a manner as to vindicate Mr. Cowdrick of every suspicion of wilful - wrong-doing. Meantime, while this inquiry is pending, and while Mr. - Cowdrick is preparing his statement of the case, it is only just to - him to ask that there shall be a suspension of public opinion. His - former high standing, his services to this community, the obscurity - in which the recent operations of the bank are shrouded, and the - most ordinary requirements of fair play, all combine to make it - desirable that public opinion shall not pronounce a final verdict - before the case is made up. We need not say how earnestly we trust - that Mr. Cowdrick will emerge from his troubles with his honor - unstained, and his reputation as a faithful guardian of the trusts - confided to him, untarnished.” - -As a precautionary measure, the preparation of these articles appeared -to be in a high sense judicious; and the Colonel naturally felt that -the _Crab_ might be depended on to keep nicely upon the right track -until he should come home. But, alas! upon the next day but one after -his departure, the foreman of the _Crab_ composing-room, either -mistaking his instructions, or being too much in haste in arranging his -material, placed both articles together in the form, and the _Crab_ -came out in the morning to provoke the mirth of the town, to excite the -contempt of its enemies, and to drive the unhappy associate editors -of the paper to madness and despair. The manner in which the rival -journals commented upon the occurrence was both brutal and infamous; -and when the subject became a little stale, the editors of the rival -journals put the _Crab_ articles carefully away in scrap books, so as -to make sure of having them ready for irritating and badgering Colonel -Hoker upon every favorable opportunity during all the years to come. - -The Colonel himself, upon discerning the catastrophe in a copy of the -paper which he picked up at his hotel, expressed his feelings freely -and vehemently by telegraph, and then he started home upon a fast -express train for the purpose of explaining his views more fully and -precisely. - -The _Crab_ itself alluded to the subject only so far as to suggest -that the stupidity of an associate editor was accountable for the -performance, and to hint that there was some reason for suspecting that -bribery had been employed by the owners of rival papers, in the vain -hope to bring the _Crab_, the only really infallible journal published, -into contempt. - -The efforts of McSorley, the coroner, to demonstrate the correctness -of his theory of suicide were indefatigable. The body not having been -discovered in any of the streams, McSorley began to search for it upon -the land. The pursuit, however, was not profitable, for no traces of -Mr. Cowdrick could be found. An ordinary coroner would have abandoned -the hunt in despair; but McSorley was no common man. He brought to the -performance of the functions of his office an enthusiasm which never -failed to kindle at the promise of a fee; and as, in this case, he was -thoroughly convinced that Cowdrick ought to have committed suicide, he -felt that for Cowdrick to have evaded his duty in the matter would have -been to perpetrate a wanton outrage upon Coroner McSorley. - -The following extract from the local reports in the _Crab_ will explain -the character of the coroner’s ultimate effort:-- - -“Yesterday a number of large bones were discovered beneath an old -stable on Twelfth Street, by some laborers. It was believed by most -of the spectators that they were the bones of a horse. But Coroner -McSorley, who was sent for, declared at once his belief that they were -portions of the skeleton of one of our prominent citizens, a banker, -who has been missing for several days. This view was contested by -several of the persons present upon the ground that the remains were -absolutely fleshless, and manifestly very old. But the coroner, to -demonstrate the accuracy of his view, proceeded to arrange the bones -upon the pavement in the form of a man. He succeeded in the attempt -to some extent, and was about to summon his jury of inquest, when -Dr. Wattles came up. The doctor examined the skeleton, and then the -following conversation ensued between him and Coroner McSorley:-- - -“‘You don’t imagine that to be the skeleton of a human being, do you, -Mr. McSorley?’ - -“Certainly it is! Don’t you see the shape of it?’ - -“‘But, my dear sir, what you have arranged as the spine, runs clear up -through what you suppose to be the skull, and projects two or three -inches beyond the top of the head.’ - -“‘Of course; and that is very likely the cause of all the trouble. The -man’s spine worked up into his head and disordered his mind. An aunt of -mine, in Wisconsin, went mad from that very cause.’ - -“‘But how do you account for the fact that there are three elbows in -the left arm and none at all in the right.’ - -“‘Dr. Wattles, I am not obliged to account for eccentricities of -formation in different individuals. I am satisfied with them as nature -made them; and that is enough. It’s none of my business if Cowdrick had -eleven elbows in one arm, and thirty-four in the other.’ - -“‘I will not argue the point, sir; but you certainly have no authority -for locating two ribs in the neck, and for placing a row of teeth upon -the upper side of the right foot. That foot, Mr. McSorley, is nothing -but a fragment of a lower jawbone, depend upon it.’ - -“‘How do you know that the deceased had no teeth there? You doctors -always want to insist that every man is constructed on the same plan. I -used to know a man in Canada who had four molar teeth in his ankle; and -two of them were plugged. This appears to be a similar case.’ - -“‘But you never knew a man who had a thighbone where his shoulder-blade -ought to be, like this one, did you? You never saw a man with a -knee-cap in the small of his back, either, did you?” - -[Illustration: “YOU NEVER SAW A MAN WITH A KNEE-CAP IN THE SMALL OF HIS -BACK.”] - -“‘Maybe I did, and maybe I didn’t. I have no time to discuss the -subject now. The inquest that I am about to hold will bring out the -facts. Mr. O’Flynn, swear in the jury!’” - -The evidence that was given by the witnesses was of the most varied -and entertaining character; and though much of it was vague and much -was irrelevant, the jury appeared to have no difficulty in reaching a -conclusion, for, after a few minutes’ deliberation, they brought in -a verdict that “the deceased, Henry P. Cowdrick, came to his death -from cause or causes unknown;” and then they collected their fees and -dispersed, with a grateful consciousness that they had fully discharged -their duty to society. - -But, of course, perfectly disinterested persons, persons who were -not in the way of earning jury fees, were disposed to regard with -incredulity the conclusions reached by the coroner and his friends, and -still it was for the community a vexed question--What had become of Mr. -Cowdrick? - -The coroner’s theory, however, was not entirely forgotten, because Dr. -Wattles sent to one of the daily papers a communication, in which he -expressed his opinion of the bones over which the inquest was held. -This provoked from “An Eminent Scientist,” who had not seen the bones, -a suggestion of the possibility that they may have belonged to some -mysterious creature who was the missing link between man and the lower -orders of mammalia. - -To this there came a hot response from Father Tunicle and several other -clergymen, who proceeded to show the monstrous folly and wickedness of -such a supposition, and who demonstrated that Science and Infidelity, -not to say sheer Paganism, were pretty nearly one and the same thing. - -The clerical utterances so excited at least half-a-dozen other Eminent -Scientists that the latter undertook to demonstrate, through the -columns of the daily papers, that the book of Genesis was written -by Jeremiah; that life first visited this planet in the shape of -star-dust, which, after developing into jelly-fish, gradually grew -to the ape form, and ultimately became man. They showed how all -religion is priestcraft and superstition; they traced all the creeds -backward to myths built upon the operations of Nature; they could -hardly refrain from mirth at the notion of a Great First Cause; and -they positively refused to join with the multitude, for whom, however, -they expressed deep compassion, in believing anything that they could -not see, or feel, or analyze. - -It seemed a large controversy to grow out of Coroner McSorley’s -arrangement of the unearthed bones; but the controversialists -manifestly regarded it as of the very highest importance; although, -when it was ended, each believed precisely what he had believed before. - -At St. Cadmus’s, the Cowdrick tragedy had had, upon the whole, rather -a good effect. The event was mournful, of course, but it produced some -desirable results. The Tunicle party felt that they had lost one of -their most ardent supporters, and a contributor upon whose wealth they -had depended greatly for the success of their plans. Thus they were -able more easily to perceive the excellence of a spirit of concession, -and at once they began to approach the other side with offers of -compromise. - -Happily, at this juncture, Father Krum received a “call” to a church -in another diocese, and he accepted it promptly, sending in his -resignation of his position as the assistant minister at St. Cadmus’s. -Father Tunicle, then, of his own motion, offered to abandon, as not -absolutely essential to salvation, the use of black book-markers upon -Good Friday; whereupon Mr. Yetts and his adherents in the vestry -declared themselves satisfied, and once more resumed their accustomed -places in the sanctuary on Sunday. - -Upon the second Sunday after the disappearance of Mr. Cowdrick, Father -Tunicle, who held stoutly to the theory that his late vestryman had -been murdered, resolved to refer indirectly in his remarks from the -pulpit to the bereavement; and upon his invitation, Mrs. Cowdrick and -Leonie attended the church, heavily veiled, to obtain what consolation -might be possible from the services. - -Father Tunicle, being somewhat pressed for time during the preceding -week, had procured from a dealer in such commodities, at the price of -three dollars, an original sermon addressed to persons in affliction, -and this he brought with him into the pulpit, wrapped in Leonie’s -worked velvet sermon-cover. The fact that the sermon was nicely -lithographed, so that it closely resembled manuscript, made it quite -impossible for any one to suspect that it was not the product of Father -Tunicle’s own intellectual effort and of his earnest sympathy. The -discourse was divided into four parts; three heads, and an affecting -application; which, at three dollars for the whole, of course amounted -to just seventy-five cents a part--not too much, surely, for so -wholesome and comforting a sermon. - -Father Tunicle preached it with much eloquence; but Mrs. Cowdrick, -despite an occasional sob beneath her veil, managed to restrain her -feelings until Father Tunicle had gotten through with one dollar and -a half’s worth of the sermon, and had begun upon the third head. -Then Mrs. Cowdrick could stand it no longer. One passionate outburst -of grief followed another, until, when the attention of the entire -congregation was directed to Mrs. Cowdrick, the sexton came in, and -led her in a fainting condition down the aisle to the door, where she -was placed in the carriage with Leonie, with nothing to solace her but -the reflection that everybody in the church, including the odious De -Flukes, _must_ have noticed her sealskin sacque and her lovely diamond -earrings. - - -CHAPTER IV. - - MR. WEEMS.--TOM BENNET’S WAY.--MR. GUNN’S PROPOSAL.--BREACH OF - PROMISE.--THE TRIAL. - -One morning, Mr. Julius Weems sat in his studio, dressed in velvet -working jacket and slouching hat. With palette on thumb, brush in hand, -and pipe in mouth, Mr. Weems was endeavoring to give a sufficiently -aged appearance to a “Saul and Witch of Endor,” by Salvator Rosa. - -“Hang it,” said Mr. Weems to himself, as he placed a dab of burnt umber -on the withered cheek of the hag, “everything seems to go wrong! It was -bad enough to have old Cowdrick dupe me in the way he did; but right on -top of that, to hear from Crook and Gudgem that the Rubens business is -being overdone, and that they have had eight St. Ethelbertas offered to -them during the week, is a little too much. If the entire profession of -artists is going to turn to painting old masters, I will have to come -down to modern art and poor prices. It’s the worst luck! There is no -chance at all for a man to earn an honest living!” - -Mr. Weems’s soliloquy was interrupted by a light knocking upon his -door. Hastily throwing a cloth over the picture upon his easel, and -turning two Titians and a Raphael with their faces to the wall, Mr. -Weems opened the door and admitted the visitor. - -“Good morning!” said the intruder. “Don’t know me, I suppose?” - -“No.” responded Mr. Weems. - -“My name is Gunn; Benjamin P. Gunn.” - -“I have heard of you. You are interested in life assurance, I believe? -A canvasser, or something?” - -“Yes, I was; but I have given that up now. The business was overdone. I -grew tired of it!” - -“You don’t know anything, then, about Mr. Cowdrick’s case? I mean -whether he had much on his life or not?” - -“Oh! well, I have heard that he was insured for fifty thousand or so; I -don’t remember the exact amount. But it makes no difference.” - -“Will the widow be likely to get it if he is dead?” - -“In my opinion she will have a mighty slim chance of collecting -anything, even if she can prove that he is actually deceased. From -what I know of the President of the Widows’ and Orphans’ Mutual Life -Insurance Company, I believe he will fight the claim through all the -courts. That is his rule. Nearly all the companies do it.” - -“What! even if it is a clear case for the policy-holder?” - -“Of course! That is the regular thing. They’ll worry a widow so that -she will be glad to compromise on half the claim, and by the time she -has paid her lawyers most of that is gone.” - -“That seems hard!” - -“Yes; that is one of the reasons why I quit. Take the case of Lemuel A. -Gerlach, for example. You remember it?” - -“No.” - -“Well, sir, I did my best to persuade that man to insure. He didn’t -want to; but I harried him into it. I waited on him at his office; I -disturbed him at his meals; I lay in wait for him when he came home -from the club; I followed him to the sea-shore in summer; when he -went yachting I pursued him with a steam-tug; when he was sick I got -the apothecary to enclose our circulars with his medicine; I sat next -to him in church for four consecutive Sundays, and slipped mortality -tables into his prayer-book; I rode with him in the same carriage when -he went to funerals, and lectured him all the way out to the cemetery -upon the uncertainty of human life. Finally, he succumbed. I knew he -would. It was only a question of time. I took him down to the office; -the company’s surgeon examined him, and said he was the healthiest man -he ever saw--not a flaw in him anywhere. So he paid his premium and got -his policy. Two months later he died. When Mrs. Gerlach called to get -her money, the President threatened to have her put out of the office -because she denied that Gerlach’s liver was torpid when he took out his -policy.” - -“Did they pay, finally?” - -“Pay! not a dollar! The widow sued to recover, and the company put -the surgeon and eight miscellaneous doctors on the stand to prove -that Gerlach for years had been a complete physical wreck, with more -diseases than most people ever heard of; and they undertook to show -that Gerlach had devoted the latter part of his life to organizing -a scheme for foisting himself upon the company for the purpose of -swindling it. That was five years ago. The case is pending in the -courts yet, and the widow has already spent twenty per cent. more than -the face of the policy.” - -“It was not a very profitable speculation, certainly.” - -“No, sir; it wasn’t. I’ll tell you what, Mr. Weems, if a man wants -to realize on his departed relatives, that is not the way to do it. -Anything is better than life insurance; even Tom Bennet’s way.” - -“How was that?” - -“Why, Tom Bennet, you know, is a friend of mine, who lives out in -Arkansas. And one day, some years ago, a little cemetery in the town in -which he lived was sold out by the sheriff. Tommy was looking about for -a site on which to build a house for himself, and, as this one happened -to suit him, he bid on it, and got it at a very low figure. When he -began to dig the cellar, Tom found that the folks who were interred -in the place had been petrified, to a man. Every occupant turned to -solid stone! So Tom, you know, being a practical kind of man, made up -his mind to quarry out the departed, and to utilize them for building -material.” - -“Rather unkind, wasn’t it?” - -“Tom didn’t appear to think so. And as the building made progress, -he rubbed down Mr. Flaherty for a door-sill, and had Judge Paterson -chipped off with a chisel into the handsomest hitching-post that you -ever saw.” - -“Horrible!” - -“Yes. Some of the McTurk family were put into the bow-window, between -the sashes, and the whole of the families of Major Magill and Mr. -Dougherty were worked into the foundation. And when the roof was going -on, Tom Bennet took General Hidenhooper, and bored a flue through the -crown of his head downward, so as to use him for a chimney-top. The -edifice, when completed, presented a rather striking appearance.” - -“What did the surviving relatives have to say?” - -“They were indignant, of course; but as the courts decided that the -petrifactions, without doubt, were part of the real estate, and were -included in the title-deeds, they could do nothing but remonstrate, and -Tom paid no attention to that.” - -“Then it is your professional opinion,” said Mr. Weems, returning to -the subject uppermost in his mind, “that the Insurance Company will not -pay, even if Mr. Cowdrick be found to be dead!” - -Mr. Gunn smiled in a peculiar manner, and then, after a moment’s -hesitation, he said: “Really, you know, Mr. Weems, there is no use of -discussing that contingency. Cowdrick is not dead.” - -“How do you know?” - -“Why, that is the very thing I called to see you about. I am on the -detective force now. Regularly employed by the police authorities. I -know exactly where Cowdrick is, and I have had him under surveillance -from the very first day that he left home.” - -“Why haven’t you arrested him, then?” - -Mr. Gunn laughed. “Oh, it was not worth while. I knew I could get -him whenever I wanted him. It never pays to be in a hurry with such -matters.” - -“A heavy reward has been offered for him, I believe,” said Mr. Weems. - -“That’s just it,” replied Mr. Gunn. - -“I don’t understand you.” - -“Why, the authorities express their anxiety to catch him, by offering -to pay five hundred dollars to accomplish the feat. Now, the question -is, will Cowdrick’s friends express their wish that he shall not be -caught, by going a little higher, say up to one thousand dollars?” - -“But I cannot imagine why you should come to me with such a -proposition. Why don’t you go to Mrs. Cowdrick?” - -“I’d rather deal with a man; a man understands business so much better. -And as you are interested in Cowdrick’s family, going, as it were, to -be near and dear to him, it struck me that maybe you might give him a -chance to go off quietly upon a trip to Europe, or somewhere, and save -him from a term of years in jail. How does it strike you?” - -“Very unfavorably. In the first place, I have not enough money for your -purpose; and, in the second place, if I did have it, I should decline -to expend it for the benefit of Mr. Cowdrick.” - -“Then you refuse to negotiate?” - -“Yes, positively.” - -“Very well,” said Mr. Detective Gunn, rising, “I merely wished to -ascertain what your views were. Pardon me for interrupting you. No -offence, I hope? Good morning.” And Mr. Gunn withdrew, while Weems -closed and bolted the door. - -The artist had hardly seated himself, and resumed the work of -depicting the Witch of Endor, when another visitor knocked at the door. -Mr. Weems arose, drew the bolt, and opened the door wide enough to -permit him to look out. - -“May I come in?” asked Leonie Cowdrick, with an effort at cheeriness in -her voice. - -“Oh, certainly. Glad to see you,” replied Mr. Weems, admitting her. But -Mr. Weems did not look as if he really felt very glad. - -“Pardon me for calling, Julius,” she said, “but I think I must have -left my satchel when I was here last week. I cannot find it anywhere.” - -Poor thing! Any excuse would have sufficed to account for her coming -to try to discover why it was that her lover had not visited her for -nearly a week. - -“I do not think it is here,” said Mr. Weems; “I am sure it is not, or I -should have seen it.” - -“Then it is lost beyond recovery,” exclaimed Leonie, sinking into a -chair, and fanning herself, while she looked very hard at the artist, -who pretended to be busy with his picture. - -“Haven’t heard anything from your father yet, I suppose?” said Mr. -Weems, after a painful interval of silence. - -“Nothing; absolutely nothing. Poor mother is nearly distracted. We are -in great trouble. And I thought, Julius, you would have been with us -more during this trial.” - -“Well,” said Mr. Weems, “you see I have been so very busy, and I have -had so many engagements, that I could not find time enough to call very -frequently.” - -“It looked almost like neglect,” said Leonie, sadly. “I could hardly -bear it.” And she put her handkerchief to her eyes. - -“Confound it!” said Mr. Weems to himself, “now there is going to be a -scene.” - -“Mother said she could hardly believe that you really loved me,” -continued Leonie. - -“She said that, did she?” asked Mr. Weems, somewhat bitterly. “Did she -ask you if you really loved _me_?” - -“No, Julius; she knows that I do. You know it, too.” - -“Love,” said the artist, “means faith, trust, fair play, and candor, -among other things, I have always thought.” - -“What do you mean by that, Julius?” - -“Well, I don’t want to be unkind, Leonie; but do you think that a woman -who truly loved a man would misrepresent her age to him; or that she -would be absolutely silent respecting previous engagements that she had -contracted? How do I know that you care more for me than you did for -Baxter and the others?” - -“Mr. Weems,” exclaimed Leonie, indignantly, “this is cruel. It is -worse,--it is shameful. You seem to have known all there was to know, -without seeking information from me.” - -“That is what made it so very painful,” replied Mr. Weems, trying to -look as if his feelings had experienced a terrible wrench. “It was -dreadful to learn from outside sources what I should have heard from -your own lips. When a woman pretends to give me her heart, I expect her -to give me her confidence also.” - -“Pretends!” exclaimed Leonie, rising. “Pretends! What do you mean, sir, -by ‘pretends’! Do you dare to insinuate that I deliberately deceived -you?” - -“Well,” said Mr. Weems, calmly, “that is perhaps a rather violent -construction of my language; but we will not quarrel over phrases.” - -“I did not think,” said Leonie, tearfully but vehemently, “that I -should be insulted when I came here,--insulted in the midst of my -grief. It is unmanly, sir! It is cowardly! It is infamous!” - -“I am sorry that you take that view of it. I did not intend to be -discourteous, I am sure. Pray pardon me if I was so. It is clear, -however, that, after what has passed, we can hardly sustain our former -relation to each other.” - -“I understand you, sir,” replied Leonie, scornfully; “I fully realize -your meaning. You intended at the outset to break our engagement. Well, -sir, it is broken. I am glad to break it. I regard you with scorn and -contempt. Hereafter we shall be as strangers to each other.” - -“I submit to your decision,” returned the artist. “But--but, of course, -you will return my letters?” - -Leonie laughed a wild and bitter laugh, and, gathering up her skirts as -if she feared contamination, she swept haughtily from the room, without -speaking another word. - -“That is settled, at any rate!” said Mr. Weems, as he closed the door. -“That is just what I wanted. I can’t afford to marry poverty. But it is -a bad business about those letters of mine! I wonder if she intends to -use them against me?” And Mr. Weems, relighting his pipe, sat down in -his easy-chair to make a mental review of the situation. - -Mr. Weems was not permitted to remain long in doubt respecting the -intentions of Miss Cowdrick. Upon the very next day he received from -Messrs. Pullock and Shreek, attorneys, formal notice that Miss Leonie -Cowdrick had authorized them to bring a suit against him for breach -of promise of marriage, the claim for pecuniary damages being laid at -thirty thousand dollars. - -Mr. Weems regarded the proceeding with not a little alarm; but, -upon consulting his lawyer, Mr. Porter, and detailing to him the -conversation between the artist and Leonie at the time of the rupture, -Mr. Weems was assured that he could make an excellent defence upon the -theory that the lady had broken the engagement; and he was strongly -advised to permit the case to go to trial. - -It did so right speedily; for the attorneys for the plaintiff secured -for it an early place upon the list, and they manifested a disposition -to push the defendant in the most unmerciful manner permitted by the -law. - -When the case was called for trial, Mr. Weems’s lawyer moved for a -postponement; and he pleaded, argued, fought, and begged for his motion -as if the life of his client and his own happiness were staked upon -a brief delay. As Mr. Weems was quite ready to proceed, he could not -imagine why there should be such earnest contention respecting this -point. But, of course, it was the regular professional thing to do. Mr. -Weems’s lawyer did not really want a continuance. He merely cared to -put himself right upon the record by conducting the performance in the -customary manner. - -Messrs. Pullock and Shreek, counsel for the plaintiff, resisted the -motion vigorously. When Mr. Shreek arose to address the court, with -regard to it, the unpractised spectator would have supposed that the -learned counsel was amazed as well as shocked at the conduct of the -defence in asking that the arm of justice should be stayed, even for -a week, from visiting punishment upon the monster who was now called -to answer for his offences. It seemed really to grieve Mr. Shreek, to -distress and hurt him, that the counsel for the defence, a member of -an honorable profession, and a man who, upon ordinary occasions, had -the respect of society and the confidence of his fellow-creatures, -should so far set at defiance all considerations of propriety, all -sense of what was due to the lovely sufferer who came here for -protection and redress, and all the demands of justice, honor, and -decency, as to try to keep the hideous facts of this case even for a -time from the attention of an intelligent and sympathetic jury. - -Mr. Shreek, as he brought his remarks to a close, was so deeply moved -by the scandalous nature of the conduct of counsel for the defence, -that Mr. Weems was disposed to believe that the breach between them -was final and irreparable; but a moment later, when Judge Winker -decided that the trial must proceed at once, Mr. Weems was surprised -to perceive his lawyer and Mr. Shreek chatting and laughing together -precisely as if Mr. Shreek had not regarded Mr. Porter’s behavior with -mingled horror and disgust. - -In selecting the jurymen, the manifest purpose of the lawyers upon both -sides was to reject every man of ordinary intelligence, and to prefer -the persons who seemed, from their appearance, least likely to possess -the power of reaching a rational conclusion upon any given subject. And -when the jury had been obtained, Mr. Weems, looking at them, thought -that he had never, in all his life, seen twelve more stupid-looking men. - -Leonie Cowdrick came in as the case opened, and took a seat close by -Mr. Pullock. She was dressed with exquisite taste, and Mr. Weems was -really surprised to perceive that she seemed quite pretty. - -Her face was partly covered by a veil, and in her hand she carried a -kerchief, with which occasionally she gently touched her eyes. - -It was clear enough that Mr. Pullock had her in training for the -purpose of producing effects upon the jury, for whenever during the -proceedings anything of a pathetic nature was developed, Mr. Pullock -signalled her, and at once her handkerchief went to her face. - -The trial endured through two days, and much of the time was occupied -by wrangles, squabbles, and fierce recriminations between the lawyers, -who, after working themselves into furious passion, and seeming ready -to fall upon each other and tear each other to pieces, invariably -resumed their friendly intercourse during the recesses, and appeared -ready to forgive and forget all the injuries of the past. - -One of the jurymen was asleep during the larger portion of the sessions -upon both days; two others paid no attention to the evidence, but -persistently gaped about the court-room, and the remainder seemed to -consider the quarrels between the counsel as the only matters of -genuine importance in the case. During the first day Mr. Detective Gunn -came in, and seeing Mr. Weems, went over to whisper in his ear that -Cowdrick had been arrested, and would reach town upon the morrow. - -“We had to take the reward,” said Gunn. “Not one of his friends would -give any more. It’s a pity for the old man, too! I see well enough now -why _you_ wouldn’t lend a hand.” And Mr. Gunn looked toward Leonie, and -laughed. - -When Mr. Porter was not engaged in examining or cross-examining a -witness, he addressed his attention to the task of getting upon terms -of jolly good-fellowship with the members of the jury who remained -awake. He sat near to the foreman, and he was continually passing jokes -to that official, with the back of his hand to his mouth--jokes which -the foreman manifestly relished, for he always sent them further along -in the jury-box. - -This mirthfulness appeared to have a very depressing effect upon -Mr. Pullock, for whenever he observed it he assumed a look of deep -mournfulness, as if it distressed him beyond measure that any one -should have an impulse to indulge in levity in the presence of the -unutterable woe which had made the life of his fair but heart-broken -client simply a condition of hopeless misery. And while the reckless -jurymen laughed, Mr. Pullock would shake his head sadly, seeming to -feel as if Justice had expanded her wings and fled forever from the -tribunals of man; and then he would nudge the lovely victim by his -side, as a hint for her to hoist her handkerchief as another signal to -the jury that she was in distress. - -But Mr. Porter’s humor, brutal and unfeeling though it might be, could -not be restrained. Particularly did many of the points in the evidence -offered by the plaintiff impress him ludicrously; and at times, when -Mr. Shreek was developing what he evidently regarded as a fact of -high and solemn importance, Mr. Porter would wink at the foreman, and -begin to writhe upon his chair in his efforts to restrain himself -from violating the decorum of the Temple of Justice by bursting into -uproarious laughter. - -These rather scandalous attempts to convey to the jurymen who were -awake Mr. Porter’s theory that the testimony for the prosecution was -nonsense of the most absurd description, and to impress them with the -belief that when Mr. Porter’s turn came, he would knock it, so to -speak, higher than a kite, provoked Mr. Shreek to such an extent, that, -finally, he stopped short in his examination of a witness, to snarl out -to Mr. Porter:-- - -“What are you laughing at? I don’t notice anything in the testimony -that is so very funny!” - -“The muscles of my face are my own,” rejoined Mr. Porter, “and I will -use them as I please.” - -“But you have no right to divert the attention of the jury by your -buffoonery!” replied Mr. Shreek, angrily. - -“I will laugh when, and how, and at what I please,” said Mr. Porter. “I -shall not accept any dictation from you. It’s not my fault if you have -a ridiculous case!” - -“I will show you how ridiculous it is before I get through,” answered -Mr. Shreek. - -“I know all about it already!” said Mr. Porter. - -Then Mr. Shreek proceeded with his examination, and Mr. Porter laughed -almost out loud two or three times, merely to show the jury that he -regarded Mr. Shreek’s remonstrance with positive contempt. But it must -be confessed that Mr. Porter’s mirthfulness, in this instance, seemed -to lack heartiness and spontaneity. - -But when Mr. Porter’s turn came to address the jury, his sense of -humor had become completely benumbed, while that of Mr. Shreek had -undergone really abnormal development; for Mr. Porter could hardly -attempt to plunge into pathos, or to permit his unfettered imagination -to take a little flight, without Mr. Shreek’s humorous susceptibilities -being aroused in such a manner that the closure of his mouth with his -handkerchief alone prevented him from offending the dignity of the -Court. - -Mr. Porter’s appeal to the jury in behalf of his client was based upon -his asseveration that this was the most intelligent jury that he -had ever had the honor of addressing, and upon his solemn conviction -that the jurymen not only represented accurately the most respectable -portion of the community, but that, as upon this occasion the jury -system itself was upon trial to prove whether it truly was the bulwark -of liberty, that barrier against injustice and oppression which it was -vaunted to be, so this jury were, it might be said, called upon to -determine whether the system was to retain the respect and confidence -of mankind or to be branded by public sentiment as a wretched failure, -and to be regarded in the future by all honorable men with loathing and -contempt. - -As two of the jurymen happened to be Irishmen, and one of them was -a member of the Odd Fellows’ Society, Mr. Porter did not neglect to -allude to the circumstance that Mr. Weems’s great-grandfather was -born in Ireland; and the learned counsel took occasion to speak with -indignant warmth of the wrongs that have been endured by Ireland, and -to express his deep sympathy with her unfortunate and suffering people. - -Of the noble aims and splendid achievements of the Odd Fellows’ -Society, it was hardly necessary for Mr. Porter to speak at length. He -could never hope to command language of sufficient force to explain his -appreciation of the services rendered to Society by this invaluable -organization; but the fact that both he and his client had for years -belonged to the sacred brotherhood, to which they gave their energies -and their devotion, was a sufficient guarantee of the strength of their -affection for it. - -In concluding, Mr. Porter merely desired to direct the attention of -the gentlemen of the jury to the fact that if designing women were -to be permitted to decoy unsuspecting men into contracts of marriage -merely for the purpose of securing by artful means repudiation of the -contract, so that the ground would be laid for a demand for money, then -no man was safe, and no one could tell at what moment he might fall -into a snare laid for him by an unprincipled adventuress. Mr. Porter -then expressed his entire confidence in the intention of the jury to -give a verdict for his client, and he sat down with a feeling that he -had discharged his duty in an effective manner. - -Mr. Shreek, in reply, observed that he should begin with the assertion -that in two particulars this was one of the most remarkable cases that -it had ever been his fortune to try. In the first place, he was unable -to refer to an occasion, during more than twenty years’ experience at -the bar, when he had had the honor of addressing a jury so intelligent -and so worthy of being entrusted with interests of the very highest -character as this one was; and never had he felt so much confidence -as he now felt when he came before these highly-cultivated, keenly -sagacious, and thoroughly representative gentlemen to ask for justice, -simple justice, for an unhappy woman. In the second place, while it had -fallen to his lot to witness more than one painful and repulsive scene, -more than one example of the capacity of human beings for reaching -the deepest depths of degradation, in their efforts to rob Justice of -her own, and to make her very name a by-word and a reproach among the -wise and the good, he had never yet received so violent a shock as -that which came to him to-day, when, with mortification and grief, he -had heard a member of the bar, sworn to seek to uphold the sanctity -of the law and the honor of a proud profession, not only misrepresent -the truth most villanously, but so far forget his manhood as to stoop -to insult, to revile, to smite with a ribald and envenomed tongue, -a fair and noble woman, who already bent beneath an awful load of -domestic sorrow, and whose only fault was that she had come here to -seek redress for an injury the depth of which no tongue could tell, -the agony of which the imagination of him who has not fathomed all the -mystery of a woman’s love could never hope to realize. He would only -say, in dismissing this most distressing and humiliating portion of the -subject, that he left the offender to the punishment of a conscience -which, hardened and seared though it was, still must have in store for -him pangs of remorse of which he, Mr. Shreek, trembled to think. - -The learned counsel for the plaintiff asked the gentlemen of the jury -to review with him the facts of the case, as presented to them by the -evidence. - -Already they knew something of the trustfulness and confidence of -woman’s nature; their experience within the sacred privacy of the -domestic circle had taught them that when a woman gave her affection, -she gave it wholly, never doubting, never suspecting, that the -object of it might be unworthy to wear so priceless a jewel. Such a -creature,--the peerless being of whom the poet had eloquently said, -that Earth was a Desert, Eden was a Wild, Man was a Savage, until Woman -smiled--was peculiarly exposed to the wiles of artful and unscrupulous -men, who, urged by those Satanic impulses which appear in some men as -unquestionable proof of the truthfulness of the Scriptural theory of -demoniac possession, should attempt to gain the prize only to trample -it ruthlessly in the dust. - -In this instance the destroyer came to find a pure and beautiful love, -with its tendrils ready to cling fondly to some dear object. By honeyed -phrases, by whispered vows so soon to be falsified, by tender glances -from eyes which revealed none of the desperate wickedness of the soul -within, by all the arts and devices employed upon such occasions, the -defendant had persuaded those tendrils to cling to him, to entwine -about him. Artless, unsophisticated, unlearned in the ways of the -sinful world, the beautiful plaintiff had listened and believed; and -for a few short weeks she was happy in the fond belief that this -reptile who had crawled across the threshold of her maiden’s heart -was a prince of men, an idol whom she might worship with unstinted -adoration. - -But she was soon to be undeceived. Choosing the moment when her natural -defender was absent, when his coward’s deed could be done without the -infliction of condign punishment from him who loved this his only child -far better than his life, the defendant, scoffing at the holiest of the -emotions, despising the precious treasure confided to his keeping, and -gloating over the misery inflicted wantonly and savagely by his too -brutal hand, cast off her love, closed his ears to her sighs, observed -unmoved the anguish of her soul, and flung her aside, heart-broken and -despairing, while he passed coldly on to seek new hearts to break, new -lives to blast and ruin, new victims to dupe and decoy with his false -tongue and his vile hypocrisy. - -In support of his assertions, Mr. Shreek proposed to read to the jury -some of the letters addressed by the defendant to the plaintiff, while -still he maintained an appearance of fidelity to her; and the jury -would perceive more clearly than ever the blackness of the infamy -which characterized the defendant’s conduct, when at last he showed -himself in his true colors. - -Mr. Shreek then produced a bundle of letters, which had been placed in -evidence; and when he did so, the newspaper reporters sharpened their -pencils, the somnolent juryman awoke, the judge laid down his pen to -listen. Leonie again wiped her eyes, and the crowd of spectators made -a buzz, which indicated their expectation that they were going to hear -something of an uncommonly interesting nature. - -Mr. Weems alone seemed wholly sad. - -Mr. Shreek would first invite the attention of the jury to a letter, -dated simply “Tuesday morning,” and signed with the name of the -defendant. It was as follows:-- - - “MY SWEET ROSEBUD” (laughter from the spectators),--“Before me - lies your darling little letter of yesterday. I have read it - over and over again, and kissed it many times.” (Merriment in - the court-room.) “Why do you wish that you had wings, that you - might fly away and be at rest?” (“No wonder she wanted wings,” - interjected Mr. Shreek.) “Am I not all you wish?” (“He didn’t seem - to be,” said Mr. Shreek.) “Cannot I make you perfectly happy? Oh, - how I love you, my sweet, pretty, charming Rosebud! You are all - in all to me. I think I can look down the dim vista of time, and - see you going with me hand-in-hand through all the long and happy - years.” (“He was not quite so short-sighted as he appears to be,” - said Mr. Shreek; whereupon there was general laughter. Even Leonie - laughed a little.) “And now, my own sweet love” (laughter), “I - must bid you good-night. I send you a thousand kisses from your - own, ever constant - - JULIUS.” - -“Rosebud! gentlemen,” said Mr. Shreek, as he folded the letter away and -took out another. “Yes, a rosebud, and he the vile canker-worm that was -eating away its life! But this is only one of many such effusions. Upon -another occasion, he says: - - “MY BIRDIE,” (general laughter,)--“This morning a blessing came to - me by the hands of the postman, and what do you think? the writer - did not sign her name, and I am not sure whom I should thank, but - I am going to risk thanking you, my own dear, loving Leonie. Why - do you call me an angel, darling?” (“That,” observed Mr. Shreek, - “was enough to astonish him!” And then everybody laughed again.) “I - am only a plain, prosy man,” (“A close shave to the truth,” said - Mr. Shreek,) “but I am exalted by having your love. If I were an - angel, I would hover over you, my sweet,” (“And very likely drop - something on her,” added Mr. Shreek,) “and protect you. You ask me - if I think of you often! Think of you, Leonie! I think of nothing - else.” (Laughter.) “You are always in my mind; and if I keep on - loving you more and more, as I am doing, I shall die with half - my love untold.” (Laughter. “Wonderful how he loved her, wasn’t - it?” remarked Mr. Shreek.) “Again I send you a million kisses” - (merriment), “and a fond good-night, and pleasant dreams. - - “Your adoring J.” - -“Observe,” said Mr. Shreek, taking out still another letter, “how he -mocked her! How hollow, how infamous all of that sounds, in view of -his subsequent treachery!” - -Here Miss Cowdrick bowed her head and wept, and Mr. Weems looked as if -he felt that death at the stake would be mere pastime in comparison -with this experience. - -“We now come,” said Mr. Shreek, “to letter number three--a document -which reveals this moral monster in even a more hideous light.” - - “MY PRECIOUS ONE” (great laughter)--“How can I ever thank you for - the trouble you have taken to make me those lovely slippers? They - are two sizes too small for me” (laughter); “but I can look at - them and kiss them” (“He was a tremendous kisser in his way, you - observe,” said the learned counsel), “and think of you meantime. - I could not come to see you last evening, for I sprained my - ankle; but I looked at your picture and kissed it” (laughter. “At - it again, you see,” said Mr. Shreek); “and I read over your old - letters. There is a knock at my door now, and I must stop. But I - will say, I love you. Oh, how I love you! my life and my light. - - Fondly your own JULIUS.” - -“But,” continued the eloquent counsel for the plaintiff, “this false -lover, this maker of vows that were as idle as the whispering of the -summer wind, did not always write prose to the unhappy lady whom he -had deceived. Sometimes he breathed out his bogus affection through -the medium of verse. Sometimes he invoked the sacred Muse to help -him to shatter the heart of this loving and trustful woman. With the -assistance of a rhyming dictionary, or perhaps having, with a bold -and lawless hand, filched his sweets from some true poet who had felt -the impulses of a genuine passion, he wrote and sent to my lovely but -unfortunate client the following lines: - - “Sweetheart, if I could surely choose - The aptest word in passion’s speech”-- - -“That,” said the counsel, “indicates that he would steal his poetry if -he could.” - - “And all its subtlest meaning use, - With eloquence your soul to teach; - Still, forced by its intensity, - Sweetheart, my love would voiceless be!” - -(Laughter.) - -“And heartless, as well as voiceless,” added the counsel. - - “Sweetheart, though all the days and hours - Sped by, with love in sharpest stress, - To find some reach of human powers, - Its faintest impulse to express, - Till Time merged in Eternity, - Sweetheart, my love would voiceless be!” - -(Roars of laughter.) - -Mr. Shreek declared that he would read no more. It made his heart -sick--professionally, of course--to peruse these revolting evidences -of man’s inhumanity to lovely woman; of the amazing perfidy of the -plaintiff, Weems. This voiceless lover, who was not only voiceless, -but shameless, feelingless, and merciless as well, was now before -them, arraigned by that law whose foremost function was to protect -the weak, and to punish those who assail the helpless. It rests with -you, gentlemen, to say whether the cry for help made to that law by -this desolate woman with the lacerated heart shall be made in vain. So -far as Mr. Shreek was concerned, he felt perfectly certain that the -jury would award to his client the full amount of damages--a miserable -recompense, at the best--for which she sued. - -The judge’s charge was very long, very dull, and full of the most -formidable words, phrases, and references. Those who were able to -follow it intelligently, however, perceived that it really amounted to -nothing more than this: If you find the defendant guilty, it is your -duty to bring in a verdict to that effect; while, upon the other hand, -if you find him not guilty, you are required to acquit him. - -At six o’clock in the evening the jury retired, and the court waited -for the verdict. At six-thirty, the jury sent to ask that the -love-letters might be given to them; and it was whispered about that -one of the jurymen had obtained the impression, somehow, that they were -written by Miss Cowdrick to Weems. At a quarter past seven, the jury -wanted to know if they could have cigars; and Mr. Porter sent them a -couple of bundles at his own expense. At eight, word came out that -one of the jurymen, evidently the slumberer, wanted a question of fact -cleared up: Was the man suing the woman, or the woman the man? This -having been settled, the court waited until half past eight, when, amid -much excitement, the jury came in, and disappointed everybody with the -announcement that it was quite impossible for them to agree. - -Mr. Porter whispered to Mr. Weems that there was an Irishman upon that -jury whom he felt confident of from the first. - -The judge went over the case again briefly, but learnedly and vaguely, -and sent the jury back. At nine o’clock the jury came into court a -second time, and presented a verdict of guilty, imposing damages to the -amount of five thousand dollars. - -There was an outburst of applause; Leonie leaned her head upon the -breast of Mr. Pullock, and wept from mingled feelings of joy and grief. -Mr. Shreek observed to Mr. Porter, that “this is all we ever expected;” -and Mr. Porter said to Weems that he was lucky to get off so easily; -for he, Porter, had anticipated a much worse result. - -Poor Weems alone seemed to regard the verdict with less than perfect -satisfaction; and he was no better pleased next morning, when Colonel -Hoker’s _Crab_ and all the other papers came out with reports of the -trial in flaring type, and with the entire batch of love-letters, -poetry and all, in full. - -The journals also contained an announcement that Mr. Cowdrick had been -captured and brought home, and had at once been released upon bail. - - -CHAPTER V. - - MR. COWDRICK’S RETURN.--MR. WEEMS TAKES A NEW VIEW OF HIS - POSITION.--JUSTICE. - -Mr. Cowdrick again sat in his easy-chair, in his library, before the -sham fire, and with him sat his wife and daughter. They were talking of -the trial of Mr. Cowdrick, which was to begin on the morrow. - -“It is very disagreeable, of course,” said Mr. Cowdrick; “but in this -life we have to take the bitter with the sweet.” - -“But, oh, papa,” said Leonie, “how dreadful it will be if the verdict -goes against you. Do you think they would actually send a man of your -position to a horrid prison?” - -“Leonie!” exclaimed Mrs. Cowdrick, “I am surprised at your speaking of -such things. Pray don’t do it again. My nerves will not stand it.” - -“You need not be alarmed, my dear child,” said Mr. Cowdrick, smiling. -“My friends have arranged things comfortably for me with the -prosecuting attorney, and the other authorities. I had an offer made -to me to have the jury packed in my interest, but I was assured that it -was unnecessary, and, besides, I felt that it would perhaps be wrong -for me to descend to corruption.” - -“It is a terrible experience at the best,” said Mrs. Cowdrick; “but -there is some satisfaction in the reflection that we are not reduced to -absolute poverty.” - -“That is my greatest consolation,” rejoined Mr. Cowdrick. “Pinyard -tells me that I may count on saving at least two hundred and fifty -thousand dollars from the wreck; invested in good securities, too.” - -“Then we can go to a watering-place, next summer, as usual?” asked -Leonie. - -“Yes, dear.” - -“And can we keep our carriage and our servants, and everything, just as -before?” - -“Certainly; there will be no difference.” - -Leonie reflected for a moment, and then sighed heavily. - -“And I think very likely,” said Mr. Cowdrick, “that my poor little girl -can have her lover back again, if she wants him, too.” - -“Papa, what do you mean?” asked Leonie. - -“Why, I commissioned a man named Gunn, in whom I have some confidence, -to visit Weems, and to sound him, to ascertain how he felt with regard -to the result of your suit.” - -“Well?” - -“Gunn reports to me that Weems feels repentant; says he always loved -you, and would give anything to have the past recalled.” - -Here Mr. Cowdrick, having constructed a sturdy falsehood, winked at his -wife; and Leonie said: - -“Well, papa, I don’t know whether I am quite willing to forgive him, -but I confess that I care more for Julius than for any other person.” - -“We shall see what can be done,” remarked Mr. Cowdrick. “And now you -must excuse me. I have to go to meet my counsel to prepare for the -trial;” and Mr. Cowdrick withdrew. - -The interview between Mr. Weems and Mr. Benjamin P. Gunn, to which Mr. -Cowdrick alluded, was conducted upon a rather different basis from that -indicated by the banker in his conversation with Leonie. - -Mr. Gunn, upon his entrance to the studio of the artist, began by -expressing his regret at the issue of the breach of promise suit. - -“Yes, confound it,” said Mr. Weems; “it is hard, isn’t it? To think -that that old faded flower of a girl should be smart enough to get the -better of me in such a manner!” - -“The damages are heavy too,” said Gunn, thoughtfully; “and I understand -that she is firmly resolved to compel you to pay the money.” - -“That is the worst of it! The mortification was bad enough; but five -thousand dollars to pay on top of that! Why, it’s simply awful.” - -“The amount would cover the price of a good many pictures, wouldn’t it?” - -“Yes; and just now the market is so overloaded with old masters, that -they hardly fetch the value of the canvas they are painted on. A -house-painter makes more money than an artist.” - -“It must be a desire for revenge that induces the lady to be so eager -for the money. She is not poor.” - -“I guess she is. Old Cowdrick will have to give up everything, I -suppose.” - -Mr. Gunn smiled, and looked wise. Then he said, Mr. Weems, I’ll let you -into a secret if you will keep it to yourself.” - -“I will, certainly.” - -“Well, sir, I know,--I don’t merely think,--I _know_ that Cowdrick is -going to come out of this thing with at least a quarter of a million. -He’ll be just as comfortable as ever.” - -“That is nearly incredible.” - -“It is the truth, at any rate; and I can prove it.” - -“But how about his crimes? He is tolerably certain to go to prison.” - -“What, Cowdrick? Cowdrick go to prison? Not a bit of it! He is -too respectable. That has all been fixed in advance, unless I am -misinformed.” - -Mr. Weems reflected in silence for a few moments. Then Mr. Gunn, rising -to go, said,-- - -“It is none of my business, sir, of course; I only came in to give -you the facts because I felt friendly to you. But if I had my choice -between paying five thousand dollars and compromising with the -plaintiff, I know very well what I would do, particularly if the -plaintiff would rather have the man than the money. Good morning, Mr. -Weems;” and Mr. Gunn withdrew. - -“A quarter of a million!” said Mr. Weems to himself, as he sat alone, -meditating upon the situation. “What a fool I was. I might have known -that old Cowdrick would take care of himself and soon get upon his -legs again. I believe that man Gunn was sent here to feel the way for -a reconciliation, and I have half a notion to attempt one. I’ll make a -movement toward it, anyhow. I’ll write a letter to Cowdrick, and if he -gets out of the clutches of the law I will send it to him, and see if -we can’t make up the quarrel.” - -Then Mr. Weems went to his desk and penned the following epistle:-- - - “HENRY P. COWDRICK, Esq. - - “DEAR SIR,--I write to you with much diffidence and with deep - apprehension as to the result, concerning a matter in which my - happiness is seriously involved. I need not rehearse the facts - concerning my unfortunate differences with Leonie; but I wish to - say that I shall never cease to regret that a mere lovers’ quarrel, - which should have been forgotten and forgiven a moment afterwards, - should have caused, under the influence of senseless anger, a - breach which, I fear, is now irreparable. For my part, reflection - upon my conduct in the business makes me utterly miserable, for I - cannot hide from myself, and I will not attempt to hide from you, - that my affection for your daughter has lost none of its intensity - because of the occurrences of which I have spoken. I love her now - as fondly as I ever loved her; and though it should be ordained by - fate that we shall never meet again, I shall cherish her image in - my heart until my dying day, and I shall never cease to breathe - earnest petitions for her happiness. - - “Believe me, - - Yours very truly, - “JULIUS WEEMS.” - -“That,” said Mr. Weems, “ought to bring him to terms, if he really -means business.” - -Then Mr. Weems folded the letter, directed it, and slipped it into his -pocket to await the result of Mr. Cowdrick’s trial. - -It would be injudicious to linger over the details of Mr. Cowdrick’s -trial, lest we should have a surfeit of legal proceedings. Both the -prosecution and the defence were conducted with vigor and ability, -and the jury, after remaining out for a very little while, found Mr. -Cowdrick guilty of sundry crimes and misdemeanors of a particularly -infamous character. - -When the verdict had been presented, a singularly affecting scene -ensued. - -Amid a silence that was painful in its intensity, the prosecuting -attorney, hardly able to control his emotion, rose to move that -sentence be passed upon the prisoner at the bar. In doing so, he took -occasion to remark that the prosecution had no desire to crush to the -earth the unfortunate gentleman whom it had been compelled, in the -performance of a most unpleasant duty, to arraign before the tribunal -of justice. The lesson that men must not betray their trusts, and -recklessly misuse the property of others, had been plainly taught by -the conviction. That was the leading purpose of the prosecution; it -was ample fulfilment of the demands of the law and of society, and it -supplied to other men, especially to the young, a sufficiently solemn -warning against indulgence in extravagance and in unwise speculation. -It would be harsh--perhaps even cruel--in this instance to inflict -a severe penalty, not alone because of the high social standing of -the prisoner at the bar, but because it was clear enough that he did -not take the money of others solely for his own benefit, but for the -advancement of enterprises in which others were interested--enterprises -which seemed to him likely to promote the industrial activity of the -country, and to add largely to the wealth of the nation. With these -remarks, he submitted the whole matter to the discretion of the Court, -earnestly hoping that his Honor would find it possible to give to the -prisoner an opportunity to retrieve the past by his future good conduct. - -As the prosecuting attorney sat down, the court-room was bathed in -tears. - -Then the leading counsel for Mr. Cowdrick arose. It was a moment or -two before his feelings would permit him to command his utterance; and -when, at last, he was able with a broken voice to speak, he said that -he could not find language of sufficient warmth in which to express -his sense of the justice, the human kindness, the frank generosity -of the prosecuting attorney. These qualities, as here exhibited, did -credit to his head and heart, and entitled him to the commendation of -the wise and the good. The learned counsel should never for a moment -believe his client to be guilty of that of which he seemed to have -been found technically guilty, and he could add little to the fitting -and eloquent words that had just been spoken. It had been written, -“Vengeance is Mine,” and it was not for an earthly tribunal to seek to -inflict vengeance. His client’s errors, if errors they really were, -were of the head, not of the heart; and he was sure that the Court -would never undertake to humiliate this excellent and worthy man, who, -during a long career, had been an honored citizen of the community, by -even approaching a sentence which might make him look like a felon. “I -need hardly say to your Honor,” continued the learned counsel, “that -to impose the extreme penalty provided in this case would not only -close the doors of the prison upon this estimable citizen, but would -bring desolation to a happy home, would break the hearts of those -who are dear to him, and would achieve no good purpose that has not -already been attained.” Trusting in the clemency of the Court, the -learned counsel sat down, while the court-room echoed the sobs of the -spectators. - -The judge, wiping his eyes, and trying hard not to give way to his -feelings, said,-- - -“Mr. Cowdrick will please rise. As you are aware, Mr. Cowdrick, I -have but a single duty to perform. I must impose the sentence as -it is provided by the law. I remember your social position, and -your former conduct as a worthy member of society, and I have fully -estimated the importance of the suggestion that your offences were -perpetrated largely for the benefit of others. It gives me, therefore, -great pleasure to find in the statute a limitation which enables me -to inflict a penalty less severe than, otherwise, I should have been -compelled to inflict. I impose upon you a fine of five hundred dollars, -as provided in the statute, you to stand committed until the fine is -paid.” - -As the judge pronounced the sentence, a great cheer went up. Mr. -Cowdrick’s counsel paid the fine at once, and Mr. Cowdrick, after -shaking hands with the lawyers and receiving the apology of the -prosecuting attorney for pushing him so hard, took his hat and walked -out of the court-room a free and happy man. - -Then a new jury was called to try a book-keeper, who, because his -salary was insufficient for the support of his family, had stolen three -hundred dollars from his employer. - -The prosecuting attorney was unable to perceive anything of a pathetic -nature in the case, and when the jury promptly brought in a verdict of -guilty, the judge, with a perfectly dry eye, sentenced the prisoner to -incarceration at hard labor for ten years. - -Although the Goddess of Justice is blindfolded, she has sometimes a -very discriminating sense of the relative importance of sinners who -come to her for judgment. - - -CHAPTER VI. - - CONGRATULATIONS.--RECONCILIATION.--TRUE LOVE TRIUMPHANT.--THE - WEDDING.--THE END. - -One of the first of Mr. Cowdrick’s friends who called to congratulate -him upon the result of the painful ordeal to which he had been -subjected was Father Tunicle. - -“It must have been,” said the faithful pastor, “a terrible strain upon -a man of delicate sensibility to sit there, uncertain what your fate -would be. I sympathize with you heartily, and rejoice that the end was -not worse.” - -“You are very kind,” said Mr. Cowdrick, smiling. “Life is full of -sorrows and afflictions for all of us; and of course I cannot expect to -escape bearing my share of them.” - -“No; and it is a comfort to reflect that these troubles are sent to us -for our good. I shall expect you now to be a more efficient worker than -ever at St. Cadmus’s.” - -“I don’t know,” replied Mr. Cowdrick reflectively. “Possibly it might -be better, all things considered, if I should not resume my official -position in the church.” - -“But, really, you must,” answered Father Tunicle. “You are still a -member of the vestry, and matters will move more smoothly now, for -Yetts has resigned. He was the thorn in my side.” - -“Where has Yetts gone?” - -“I believe he has taken a pew at St. Sepulchre’s, which, you know, -is extremely Low Church. Poor Yetts! He has fallen very far! Do you -know that the rector of St. Sepulchre’s positively will not use a red -altar-cloth on martyrs’ days; and that he walks to church with an -umbrella upon the Festival of St. Swithin,--a positive insult to the -memory of the saint.” - -“Incredible!” exclaimed Mr. Cowdrick. - -“I have it upon good authority. Such practices do much to hinder the -progress of the work of evangelization.” - -“I should think so,” said Mr. Cowdrick. - -“And speaking of that work,” continued Father Tunicle, “I want to -obtain a little pecuniary assistance from you. I have just prepared for -circulation among the depraved poor a little tract upon the sufferings -of St. Blasius of Cappadocia, but I have not money enough to print it. -Can you help me?” - -“Certainly. How much do you want?” - -“Fifty dollars are all that I ought to ask for. That sum, I think, will -enable me to increase the religious fervor of the poor in my parish to -a notable extent.” - -Mr. Cowdrick handed the money to the devoted clergyman, who thereupon -withdrew. - -Another early caller upon Mr. Cowdrick was an agent of the Widows’ and -Orphans’ Life Assurance Company, in which the banker held a policy. -This gentleman, representing a corporation which a week before was -preparing to take legal measures to contest Mrs. Cowdrick’s claim, -brought with him the Company’s last annual statement, and a formidable -array of other documents, with an intent to persuade Mr. Cowdrick to -have his life insured for an additional twenty thousand dollars. - -Upon the second day after Mr. Cowdrick’s release, also, the De Flukes -sent to Mrs. Cowdrick an invitation to a kettle-drum, together with a -note explaining that a former unfortunate recall of an invitation was -due to the colossal stupidity of a servant who had since been dismissed. - -This very considerate behavior on the part of the De Flukes had a -favorable effect upon Mrs. Cowdrick’s spirits. She brightened up in a -wonderful manner, and there seemed to be every reason for believing -that her load of sorrow was lifted at last. - -Colonel Hoker, writing in the _Crab_ of the trial and its results, -explained to his readers that the verdict was rather technical than -indicative of intentional wrong-doing, and he congratulated the -community that one of its most enterprising and valuable citizens -had succeeded in escaping from the toils of complicated financial -transactions in which he had been enveloped by injudicious friends. - -Colonel Hoker was disposed to criticise with some degree of severity -Coroner McSorley’s absurd, not to say wicked, performances with the -unearthed bones; but the violence of the indignation with which he -contemplated the phenomenal stupidity and the grasping avarice of the -coroner, with respect to the remains in question, was greatly tempered -by the consideration that Coroner McSorley’s brother was sheriff of -the county, with an advertising patronage estimated by good judges to -amount to not less than fifty thousand dollars a year. - -When Mr. Cowdrick received the note addressed to him by Mr. Weems, he -replied briefly, asking the artist to call upon him at his residence; -and when Mr. Weems did so, Mr. Cowdrick received him with gravity, and -with some degree of coolness. - -“Mr. Weems,” said the banker, “I sent for you because I wished to -discuss with you the matter referred to in your note. My first impulse -was to take no notice of the communication, for I will not conceal from -you that your treatment of my daughter had embittered me against you -to such an extent, that I felt as if I could never forgive you. But -my child’s happiness must be considered before my own feelings. It is -my duty and my privilege so to consider them; and, to be frank with -you, her sufferings have been so intense within the last few days, that -I have felt myself willing to make almost any sacrifice in order to -alleviate them.” - -“Miss Leonie is not ill, I trust?” asked Mr. Weems, with an admirably -simulated look of alarm upon his countenance. - -“Mr. Weems,” said Mr. Cowdrick, seriously, “it may be injudicious for -me to say so to you, because it will give you an unfair advantage at -the outset; but Leonie has been deeply distressed at your treatment -of her. If I were a sentimental man, I should say that her heart is -breaking. She refuses food, she is continually downcast and melancholy, -and in her broken sleep she babbles continually of you.” - -“Poor thing!” said Mr. Weems, wiping his eyes. - -“Mrs. Cowdrick and I have been much distressed because of her -condition; but we should have been at a loss for a remedy if your note -had not suggested one.” - -“I have been equally unhappy myself,” said Mr. Weems. “I wrote because -I could find relief for my feelings in no other manner.” - -“Now that you are here,” continued Mr. Cowdrick, “we might as well have -a complete understanding. Are you prepared to make a proposition of -any kind?” - -“I should like to offer a suggestion, if I dared.” - -“You have my permission to speak freely; and I would add, in order -to remove any misapprehension, that Leonie Cowdrick need not seek an -alliance unless she chooses to do so, for her parents are well able to -maintain her in luxury.” - -“Well, Mr. Cowdrick,” replied Mr. Weems, “what I have to say is, that -if Leonie can forgive and forget the past, it will give me the greatest -happiness to renew my engagement with her, and to return to the -conditions that existed before that miserable quarrel occurred. Do you -think she will consent?” - -“Under some pressure from me and from her mother, I think she will. For -my part, I am willing to overlook what has happened, and to receive you -once more into my family.” - -Mr. Cowdrick extended his hand, and Mr. Weems shook it warmly. - -“And now, Mr. Weems,” said Mr. Cowdrick, “there’s another matter, of -which I wish to speak. I refer to your art. Pardon me for asking you, -but although I shall make some provision for Leonie, you, of course, -must do something also. What is the condition of your art--in a -financial sense, I mean?” - -“Well, business is a little dull just at this moment.” - -“I thought so. The proportion of old masters in the market to the -purchasing population is too great. Can’t you take up something else?” - -Mr. Weems reflected for a moment upon the painful lack of opportunities -to rob banks with impunity and profit, and then said,-- - -“No; I am afraid not. I am a painter and must live by painting.” - -“Just so; but why not paint pictures that can be sold readily?” - -“There is no money in landscapes, still-life, or figure-pieces, unless -a man has genius. A painter of ordinary powers has no chance.” - -“But why not imitate genius, just as you imitate the old masters?” - -“How do you mean?” - -“Genius is apt to be eccentric. If you make a show of eccentricity, -most persons will accept that as a sure token of genius. You want to be -odd, novel, peculiar, altogether different from other people.” - -“There may be something in that.” - -“Paint a Venus with feet like a fishwoman, and with a cast in her -eye. Paint a Moses with a moustache and spectacles. Daub off a -jet-black night-scene, in which you can perceive nothing but absolute, -impenetrable gloom, and label it ‘A Meditation upon Darkness;’ cover a -canvas with blots of white paint, with nothing but the bowsprit of a -ship visible, and call it ‘A Misty Morning in the Harbor.’ That is the -way to provoke criticism and discussion, to acquire notoriety, and to -find purchasers.” - -“It is a good idea,” replied Mr. Weems. “I am much obliged to you for -it; I will accept it, and act upon it.” - -“Would you like to see Leonie before you go?” asked Mr. Cowdrick. - -“If she is willing, I should very much.” - -“I will speak to her about it, and prepare her for the interview,” said -Mr. Cowdrick, withdrawing from the room. - -A moment later he returned with Leonie upon his arm. She had her -handkerchief to her eyes. - -“Leonie,” said Mr. Cowdrick, “this is Julius. He asks you to forgive -him.” - -[Illustration: “THEN SHE FLEW INTO HIS ARMS.”] - -Leonie lifted up her head, and the lovers looked at each other for an -instant. Then she flew into his arms before a word had been spoken by -either of them, and as he clasped her closely, she nestled her head -upon his bosom. - -Mr. Weems retained his self-possession so perfectly during this -touching scene that he was conscious of the fracture of some cigars in -his waistcoat pocket by the presence of Leonie’s shoulder; but he bore -the disaster bravely, without flinching. - -Before he released his hold of her, Mrs. Cowdrick entered the room, -and was so much overcome by the intensity of her emotions when she -saw the lovers, that she dropped upon the sofa, and remained in a -hysterical condition for at least ten minutes, despite the efforts of -Mr. Cowdrick to soothe her. - -When Mrs. Cowdrick’s emotion had at last been brought to some extent -under control, Mr. Cowdrick suggested that it might be as well to fix -at once upon a day for the wedding, so that the two lovers, after all -the sorrows and misunderstandings that had kept them apart, might enter -the perfect bliss and the sure serenity of wedlock. - -Mr. Cowdrick pressed for an early date, and although Mrs. Cowdrick -betrayed new and alarming hysterical symptoms when her husband -expressed the opinion that all the arrangements might be made within a -week, she finally reconciled herself to the selection by Leonie of a -day exactly three weeks distant. - -Upon the very next morning Mrs. Cowdrick and Leonie began the work -of preparation; and it is unnecessary to say that while the labor -continued, both of them were in a state of nearly perfect felicity. - -If earth is ever to a woman a little heaven here below, it is when she -is called upon to go shopping upon a large scale with a long purse. -The female mind experiences the purest joy when there are bonnets to -be trimmed, fabrics to be matched, dresses to be made, underclothing -to be stitched and frilled, pillow-cases and sheets to be made up, -towels to be fringed and marked, furniture to be selected, crockery -to be purchased, and a general fitting-out to be undertaken. Mrs. -Cowdrick soon had a dozen sempstresses employed, and every day she and -Leonie, in a frame of exquisite happiness, made the round of the shops, -gathering huge heaps of parcels. One single touch of alloy came to -mitigate the intensity of their enjoyment. The diamond merchant and the -dealer in sealskin sacques, having learned from harsh experience the -peril of Mrs. Cowdrick’s enthusiasm for nice things, unkindly insisted -upon making their contributions to Leonie’s outfit upon a basis of cash -in hand before delivery of the goods. But then we must not expect to -have absolutely pure joy in this world. - -Cards for the wedding were sent out at once to all of the friends -of the bride and groom, and of Mr. and Mrs. Cowdrick. Of course, it -can hardly be expected that the union of two lovers should excite -very tender sympathy among disinterested persons; but it is rather -melancholy to reflect that most of the individuals who received -cards from the Cowdricks did not accept the compliment with unmixed -satisfaction. The first thought that occurred to them upon reading the -invitation was that they would be compelled to expend something for -wedding presents, and many of them had a feeling, not clearly defined, -but still strong, that the marriage of Cowdrick’s daughter was somehow -a mean kind of an attempt on Cowdrick’s part to levy tribute upon them. - -The presents, however, soon began to come in. Father Tunicle was heard -from among the first. He sent a sweet little volume of his sermons -(the lithographed discourse not being included among them). The book -had been published at the cost of a few of the reverend gentleman’s -admirers, whose expectations of the result were rather disappointed by -the sale of no more than thirty-four copies within two years. Father -Tunicle sent the book to Leonie, with a touching note, requesting -her especial attention to the sermon upon Auricular Confession, upon -page 75. Colonel Hoker, of the _Crab_, sent a handsome silver-plated -tea-set, whose value to Leonie was not in any manner decreased by the -circumstance, unknown to her, that the Colonel had taken it from a -former advertiser in payment for a bad debt. The De Flukes sent a pair -of elegant fish-knives quite large enough to have served at a dinner -where a moderate-sized whale should follow the soup, and certainly -utterly useless for the dissection and distribution of any fish of -smaller dimensions than a sturgeon. The Higginses, who were not in -very good circumstances, and who were trying hard to save up enough -money to pay for a fortnight’s visit to the seaside in the summer, -reluctantly sent a cake-basket, because Mr. Cowdrick had given one -to Maria Higgins the year before, upon the occasion of her union with -Dr. Turmeric. If Mr. Higgins had ventured, in the note he sent with -the gift, to express his true feelings, the vehemence of his utterance -would have made Leonie’s head swim; but, happily, he controlled himself. - -A perfect outrage was, however, perpetrated by Mr. John Doubleday, who -had lost heavily by the failure of Mr. Cowdrick’s bank. He positively -had the impudence to enclose to Leonie, with his compliments, a cheque -for one hundred dollars upon the aforesaid late financial institution. -Mr. Cowdrick said that a man who was capable of doing a thing of that -kind was not fit to live in civilized society. - -Mr. Weems’s artist friends all sent pictures, evidently with an intent -that Weems should begin his married life with the walls of his dwelling -covered with “pot-boilers,” whose unsalable qualities made them as -ineffective in that capacity as they were in their pretensions to be -regarded as works of art. Weems felt, as he surveyed the collection, -that there must have been among the brethren an organized conspiracy to -unload upon him the corners of the studios. - -Among the other presents received were travelling-cases, which held -nothing that anybody ever wants upon a journey; cheap spoons put into a -case marked with the name of a first-class silversmith, with an intent -to create a wrong impression respecting the quality of the wares; and -a host of trifles, most of them completely useless, and all of them -accounted by the bride and groom as so much spoil collected under the -duress of a custom which is idiotic when it requires anything that is -not a genuine expression of affection or esteem. - -At last, when every indignant friend had sent in a contribution, when -all the dresses were made, the bonnets constructed, and the frippery -and fiddle-faddle and frills arranged, the day of the wedding came. -It must be described, of course. But why should an unpractised hand -attempt to tell of it, when there is, within easy reach, the narrative -written by the expert and dexterous fashion reporter of the _Daily -Crab_? Far better would it be to transfer bodily to these pages that -faithful and complete description. - - (_From the “Daily Crab.”_) - - A WEDDING IN HIGH LIFE. - - “St. Cadmus’s Church, Perkiomen Square, yesterday was the scene - of one of the most brilliant weddings of the season. For some - weeks past the approaching event has been an absorbing topic - of conversation in fashionable circles, the loveliness of the - bride-elect, the popularity of the fortunate groom, and the high - social standing of all the interested parties having invested - the matter with more than ordinary importance. The bride was Miss - Leonie Cowdrick, only daughter of the well-known ex-banker and - philanthropist, Henry G. Cowdrick, Esq., and herself one of the - leading belles of the _bon ton_. The groom was Julius Weems, Esq., - the artist, a man whose skill as a wielder of the brush, not less - than his qualities of head and heart, have made him the idol of a - large circle of friends. - - “The wedding ceremony was announced for half-past four in the - afternoon; and long before that hour the streets in the vicinity of - St. Cadmus’s were thronged with equipages belonging to the _élite_ - of our society. None were admitted to the church but those who were - so happy as to possess cards; the edifice, however, was densely - thronged, with the exception of the pews which were reserved in - the front for the immediate family and near relatives of the high - contracting parties. - - “The ushers, who officiated with rare delicacy and discrimination, - were Messrs. Peter B. Thomas, Arthur McGinn Dabney, G. G. Parker, - and Daniel O’Huff--all of them brother artists of the groom’s, and - men well known in cultivated circles. - - “Professor Peddle presided at the organ, and previous to the - arrival of the bridal party he discoursed most delicious music. - - “Among the distinguished persons who graced the occasion with - their presence, we noted the following:-- - - “Major-Gen. Bung, Colonel Growler, Professor Boodle, Rev. Dr. - Wattles, Judge Potthinkle, Captain Dingus, Major Doolittle, Hon. - John Gigg, M.C., Judge Snoozer, of the Supreme Court; Miss Delilah - Hopper (Minnie Myrtle), the famous authoress of ‘The Bride of - an Evening,’ ‘A Broken Heart,’ etc., etc., Professor Blizzard, - State Entomologist; Governor Tilby, Ex-Governor Raffles, Dr. - Borer, U.S.A.; Rear-Admiral Mizzen, U.S.N.; Senator Smoot, Signor - Portulacca, the Venezuelan Ambassador, General Curculio, Minister - from Nicaragua; General Whisker, the railroad magnate; Colonel and - Mrs. Grabeau, Dr. Hummer, Thos. G. Witt, Esq., Hon. John Grubb, - Captain Mahoney, of the State Militia; Professor Smith, of the - University; Galusha M. Budd, President of the Board of Trade; Hon. - P. R. Bixby, Mayor of the City; and many others. - - “At precisely five o’clock, Rev. Mr. Tunicle entered the church in - full ecclesiastical vestments, accompanied by Rev. Dr. Pillsbury, - and by Rev. John A. Stapleton, an uncle of the bride’s. At this - juncture the organ sounded the first notes of the Coronation March - from ‘Il Prophete,’ and the bride entered upon the arm of her - father. Following her came the groom, with Miss Lillie Whackle, the - first bridesmaid, and these were succeeded by the remainder of the - bridal party. - - “The bride was dressed with exquisite taste, in a white satin - costume, which had creamy lace in jabots down the waist and sides, - mingled with pearl trimmings; while the sleeves coming only to the - elbow, were made entirely of lace. The back was left quite plain, - with waist and skirt in one. Upon her head she wore a dainty wreath - of orange blossoms, and, of course, the usual veil. - - “Among other costumes in the bridal party, we noticed a Lyons - tulle, made up over satin, with flowing rosettes, and ribbons of - white satin for trimming. - - “Attention was directed also to a white tarletan trimmed with - Breton lace and insertions, and covered with bows and loops and - ends of satin ribbon. - - “One of the ladies of the party wore a distinguished costume of - cream-colored satin, with paniers of Pekin grenadine, with stripes - of white alternating with stripes of cream-color; there was a satin - corsage, plain, like a basque; and across the front-breadths of the - skirt there were soft puffs of satin and grenadine. - - “Mrs. Cowdrick, the mother of the bride, appeared in a regal - toilette of black velvet and diamonds. - - “The ceremony was read in a deeply impressive manner by Rev. Mr. - Tunicle, the bride being given away, of course, by her father. - - “Mrs. Cowdrick was so strongly affected by the consciousness that - her daughter was being taken from her, that at the conclusion of - the ceremony she displayed some slight hysterical symptoms, which - for a moment threatened to create confusion. She became calmer, - however, and was led out from the church by one of the ushers, - weeping. - - “Professor Peddle then began Mendelssohn’s Wedding March, and the - proud and happy groom, with his lovely wife upon his arm, turned to - lead the bridal party down the aisle. - - “We learn that a magnificent entertainment was given later in the - day at the residence of Mr. Cowdrick, to his friends, and that the - festivities were prolonged until a late hour. It is understood that - the newly-married couple will spend their honeymoon at Saratoga.” - -The reporter was not admitted to the entertainment, and so there is -upon record no description of it. But we might, if we chose, safely -guess at hot rooms, so crowded that motion was nearly impossible; at -absurd attempts to dance within narrow spaces; at rows of wall-flowers -along the sides of the rooms; at inane attempts at conversation between -guests who were strangers to each other; of groups of uncomfortable -people trying to appear as if they felt very happy; of a supper-table -loaded with rich viands for which well-dressed men scrambled as if -they had been fasting for weeks; of ices spilled upon costly dresses, -and champagne glasses emptied upon fine coats; and, finally, of -departing guests in the gentlemen’s dressing-rooms, saying unhandsome -things to each other in sneering whispers of the man whose hospitality -they had accepted. - -We can imagine these things; and perhaps if we could have looked into -the house at two o’clock in the morning when the last guest had said -farewell, we might have heard Mr. Cowdrick say, as he threw himself -weary and worn in an easy-chair,-- - -“Well, thank goodness, Louisa, Leonie is off of our hands at last!” - - - - -AN OLD FOGY. - - -“The good old times! And the old times _were_ good, my dear; better, -much better, than the times that you live in. I know I am an old fogy, -Nelly,” said Ephraim Batterby, refilling his pipe, and looking at his -granddaughter, who sat with him in front of the fire, with her head -bending over her sewing; “I know I am an old fogy, and I glory in it.” - -“But you never will be for me, grandpa,” said Nelly, glancing at him -with a smile. - -“Yes, my dear, I am for everybody. I am a man of the past. Everything -I ever cared for and ever loved, excepting you, belongs to the years -that have gone, and my affections belong to those years. I liked the -people of the old time better than I do those of the new. I loved their -simpler ways, the ways that I knew in my boyhood, threescore and more -years ago. I am sure the world is not so good as it was then. It is -smarter, perhaps; it knows more, but its wisdom vexes and disgusts me. -I am not certain, my dear, that, if I had my way, I would not sweep -away, at one stroke, all the so-called ‘modern conveniences,’ and -return to the ancient methods.” - -“They were very slow, grandpa.” - -“Yes, slow; and for that I liked them. We go too fast now; but our -speed, I am afraid, is hurrying us in the wrong direction. We were -satisfied in the old time with what we had. It was good enough. Are -men contented now? No; they are still improving and improving; still -reaching out for something that will be quicker, or easier, or cheaper -than the things that are. We appear to have gained much; but really we -have gained nothing. We are not a bit better off now than we were; not -so well off, in my opinion.” - -“But, grandpa, you must remember that you were young then, and perhaps -looked at the world in a more hopeful way than you do now.” - -“Yes, I allow for that, Nelly, I allow for that; I don’t deceive -myself. My youth does not seem so very far off that I cannot remember -it distinctly. I judge the time fairly, now in my old age, as I judge -the present time, and my assured opinion is that it was superior in its -ways, its life, and its people. Its people! Ah, Nelly, my dear, there -were three persons in that past who alone would consecrate it to me. I -am afraid there are not many women now like your mother and mine, and -like my dear wife, whom you never saw. It seems to me, my child, that -I would willingly live all my life over again, with its strifes and -sorrows, if I could clasp again the hand of one of those angelic women, -and hear a word from her sweet lips.” - -As the old man wiped the gathering moisture from his eyes, Nelly -remained silent, choosing not to disturb the reverie into which he had -fallen. Presently Ephraim rose abruptly, and said, with a smile,-- - -“Come, Nelly dear, I guess it is time to go to bed. I must be up very -early to-morrow morning.” - -“At what hour do you want breakfast, grandpa?” - -“Why, too soon for you, you sleepy puss. I shall breakfast by myself -before you are up, or else I shall breakfast down town. I have a huge -cargo of wheat in from Chicago, and I must arrange to have it shipped -for Liverpool. There is one thing that remains to me from the old time, -and that is some of the hard work of my youth; but even that seems a -little harder than it used to. So, come now; to bed! to bed!” - -While he was undressing, and long after he had crept beneath the -blankets, Ephraim’s thoughts wandered back and back through the spent -years; and, as the happiness he had known came freshly and strongly -into his mind, he felt drawn more and more towards it; until the new -and old mingled together in strange but placid confusion in his brain, -and he fell asleep. - -When he awoke it was still dark, for the winter was just begun; but he -heard--or did he only dream that he heard?--a clock in some neighboring -steeple strike _six_. He knew that he must get up, for his business -upon that day demanded early attention. - -He sat up in bed, yawned, stretched his arms once or twice, and then, -flinging the covering aside, he leaped to the floor. He fell, and -hurt his arm somewhat. Strange that he should have miscalculated the -distance! The bed seemed more than twice as high from the floor as it -should be. It was too dark to see distinctly, so he crept to the bed -with extended hands, and felt it. Yes, it was at least four feet from -the floor, and, very oddly, it had long, slim posts, such as bedsteads -used to have, instead of the low, carved footboard, and the high, -postless headboard, which belonged to the bedstead upon which he had -slept in recent years. Ephraim resolved to strike a light. He groped -his way to the table, and tried to find the match-box. It was not -there; he could not discover it upon the bureau either. But he found -something else, which he did not recognize at first, but which a more -careful examination with his fingers told him was a flint and steel. He -was vexed that any one should play such a trick upon him. How could he -ever succeed in lighting the gas with a flint and steel! - -But he resolved to try, and he moved over towards the gas-bracket by -the bureau. It was not there! He passed his cold hand over a square -yard of the wall, where the bracket used to be, but it had vanished. -It actually seemed, too, as if there was no paper on the wall, for the -whitewash scaled off beneath his fingers. - -Perplexed and angry, Ephraim was about to replace the flint and steel -upon the bureau, and to dress in the dark, when his hand encountered a -candlestick. It contained a candle. He determined to try to light it. -He struck the flint upon the steel at least a dozen times, in the way -he remembered doing so often when he was a boy, but the sparks refused -to catch the tinder. He struck again and again, until he became really -warm with effort and indignation, and at last he succeeded. - -It was only a poor, slim tallow candle, and Ephraim thought the light -was not much better than the darkness, it was so dim and flickering -and dismal. He was conscious then that the room was chill, although -his body felt so warm; and, for fear he should catch cold, he thought -he would open the register, and let in some warm air. The register -had disappeared! There, right before him, was a vast old-fashioned -fireplace filled with wood. By what means the transformation had been -effected, he could not imagine. But he was not greatly displeased. - -“I always did like an open wood fire,” he said, “and now I will have a -roaring one.” - -So he touched the flame of the candle to the light kindling-wood, and -in a moment it was afire. - -“I will wash while it is burning up,” said Ephraim. - -He went to the place where he thought he should find the fixed -wash-stand, with hot and cold water running from the pipes, but he was -amazed to find that it had followed the strange fashion of the room, -and had gone also! There was an old hand-basin, with a cracked china -pitcher, standing upon a movable wash-stand, but the water in the -pitcher had been turned to solid ice. - -With an exclamation of impatience and indignation, Ephraim placed the -pitcher between the andirons, close to the wood in the chimney-place; -and he did so with smarting eyes, for the flue was cold, and volumes of -smoke were pouring out into the room. In a few moments he felt that he -should suffocate unless he could get some fresh air, so he resolved to -open the upper sash of the window. - -When he got to the window he perceived that the panes of glass were -only a few inches square, and that the woodwork inclosing them was -thrice thicker and heavier than it had been. He strove to pull down -the upper sash, but the effort was vain; it would not move. He tried -to lift the lower sash; it went up with difficulty; it seemed to -weigh a hundred pounds; and, when he got it up, it would not stay. He -succeeded, finally, in keeping it open by placing a chair beneath it. - -When the ice in the pitcher was thawed, he finished his toilette, and -then he descended the stairs. As nobody seemed to be moving in the -house, he resolved to go out and get his breakfast at a restaurant. He -unlocked the front door, and emerged into the street just as daylight -fairly had begun. - -As Ephraim descended the steps in front of his house, he had a distinct -impression that something was wrong, and he was conscious of a feeling -of irritation; but it seemed to him that his mind, for some reason, -did not operate with its accustomed precision; and, while he realized -the fact of a partial and very unexpected change of the conditions of -his life, he found that when he tried, in a strangely feeble way, to -grapple with the problem, the solution eluded him and baffled him. - -The force of habit, rather than a very clearly defined purpose, led -him to walk to the corner of the street, just below his dwelling, and -to pause there, as usual, to await the coming of the horse-car which -should carry him down town. Following a custom, too, he took from his -waistcoat pocket two or three pennies (which, to his surprise, had -swollen to the uncomfortable dimensions of the old copper cents), and -looked around for the news-boy from whom he bought, every morning, the -daily paper. - -The lad, however, was not to be seen; and Ephraim was somewhat vexed at -his absence, because he was especially anxious upon that morning to -observe the quotations of the Chicago and Liverpool grain markets, and -to ascertain what steamers were loading at the wharves. - -The horse-car was delayed much longer than he expected, and, while -he waited, a man passed by, dressed oddly, Ephraim noticed, in -knee-breeches and very old-fashioned coat and hat. Ephraim said to him, -politely,-- - -“Can you tell me, sir, where I can get a morning paper in this -neighborhood? The lad I buy from, commonly, is not at his post this -morning.” - -The stranger, stopping, looked at Ephraim with a queer expression, and -presently said,-- - -“I don’t think I understand you; a _morning_ paper, did you say?” - -“Yes, one of the morning papers; the _Argus_ or _Commercial_--any of -them.” - -“Why, my dear sir, there is but one newspaper published in this city. -It is the _Gazette_. It comes out on Saturday, and this, you know, is -only Tuesday.” - -“Do you mean to say that we have no daily papers?” exclaimed Ephraim, -somewhat angrily. - -“_Daily_ papers! Papers published every day! Why, sir, there is not -such a newspaper in the world, and there never will be.” - -“Pshaw!” said Ephraim, turning his back upon the man in disgust. - -The stranger smiled, and, shaking his head as if he had serious doubts -of Ephraim’s sanity, passed onward. - -“The man is cracked,” said Ephraim, looking after him. “No daily -papers! The fellow has just come from the interior of Africa, or else -he is an escaped lunatic. It is very queer that car does not come,” and -Ephraim glanced up the street anxiously. “There is not a car in sight. -A fire somewhere, I suppose. Too bad that I should have lost so much -time. I shall walk down.” - -But, as Ephraim stepped into the highway, he was surprised to find that -there were no rails there. The cobblestone pavement was unbroken. - -“Well, upon my word! This is the strangest thing of all. What on earth -has become of the street-cars? I must go afoot, I suppose, if the -distance _is_ great. I am afraid I shall be too late for business, as -it is.” - -As he walked onward at a rapid pace, and his eyes fell upon the -buildings along the route, he was queerly sensible that the city had -undergone a certain process of transformation. It had a familiar -appearance, too. He seemed to know it in its present aspect, and -yet not to know it. The way was perfectly familiar to him, and he -recognized all the prominent landmarks easily, and still he had an -indefinable feeling that some other city had stood where this did; that -he had known this very route under other conditions, and that the -later conditions were those that had passed away, while those that he -now saw belonged to a much earlier period. - -He felt, too, that the change, whatever it was, had brought a loss with -it. The buildings that lined the street now he thought very ugly. They -were old, misshapen, having pent-roofs with absurdly high gables, and -the shop-windows were small, dingy, and set with small panes of glass. -He had known it as a handsome street, edged with noble edifices, and -offering to the gaze of the pedestrian a succession of splendid windows -filled with merchandise of the most brilliant description. - -But Ephraim pressed on with a determination to seek his favorite -restaurant, for he began to feel very hungry. In a little while he -reached the corner where the restaurant should have been, but to his -vexation he saw that the building there was a coffee-house of mean -appearance, in front of which swung a blurred and faded sign. - -He resolved to enter, for he could get a breakfast here, at least. He -pushed through the low doorway and over the sanded floor into a narrow -sort of box, where a table was spread; and, as he did so, he had a hazy -feeling that this, too, was something that he was familiar with. - -“It must be,” he said, “that my brain is producing a succession of -those sensations that I have had sometimes before, which persuade the -credulous that we move continually in a circle, and forever live our -lives over again.” - -As he took his seat a waiter approached him. - -“Give me a bill of fare,” said Ephraim. - -“Bill of fare, sir? Have no bill of fare, sir. Never have them, sir; no -coffee-house has them, sir. Get you up a nice breakfast though, sir.” - -“What have you got?” - -“Ham, sir; steak, sir; boiled egg, sir; coffee, tea, muffins. Just in -from furrin countries, sir, are you?” - -“Never mind where I am from,” said Ephraim, testily. “Bring me a -broiled steak, and egg, and some muffins and coffee, and bring them -quickly.” - -“Yes, sir; half a minute, sir. Anything else, sir?” - -“Bring me a newspaper.” - -“Yes, sir; here it is, sir, the very latest, sir.” - -Ephraim took the paper, and glanced at it. It was the _Weekly Gazette_, -four days old; a little sheet of yellow-brown paper, poorly printed, -containing some fragments of news, and nothing later from Europe than -November 6, although the _Gazette_ bore date December 19. So soon as -Ephraim comprehended its worthlessness, he tossed it contemptuously -upon the floor, and waited, almost sullenly, for his breakfast. - -When it came in upon the tray, carried by the brisk waiter, it looked -dainty and tempting enough, and the fumes that rose from it were so -savory that he grew into better humor. As it was spread before him, -he perceived that the waiter had given him a very coarse, two-pronged -steel fork. - -“Take that away,” said Ephraim, tossing it to the end of the table; “I -want a silver fork.” - -“Silver fork, sir! Bless my soul, sir! We haven’t got any; never heard -of such a thing, sir.” - -“Never heard of a silver fork, you idiot!” shouted Ephraim; “why, -everybody uses them.” - -“No, sir; I think not, sir. I’ve lived with first quality people, sir, -and they all use this kind. Never saw any other kind, sir; didn’t know -there was any. Do they have ’em in furrin parts, sir?” - -“Get out!” said Ephraim, savagely. He was becoming somewhat annoyed and -bewildered by the utter disappearance of so many familiar things. - -But the breakfast was good, and he was hungry, so he fell to with -hearty zest, and, although he found the steel fork clumsy, it did him -good service. At the conclusion of the meal, Ephraim walked rapidly to -his office--the office that he had occupied for nearly sixty years. As -he opened the door, he expected to find his letters in the box wherein -the postman thrust them twice or thrice a day. They were not there. The -box itself was gone. - -“Too bad! too bad!” exclaimed Ephraim. “Everything conspires to -delay me to-day. I suppose I must sit here and wait for that lazy -letter-carrier to come, and meantime my business must wait too.” - -With the intent not to lose the time altogether, Ephraim resolved to -write a letter or two. He took from the drawer a sheet of rough white -paper, and opened his inkstand. He could not find his favorite steel -pen anywhere, and there were no other pens in the drawer, only a bundle -of quills. Ephraim determined to try to use one of these. He ruined -four, and lost ten minutes before he could make with his knife a pen -good enough to write with; but with this he finished his letter. Then -he had another hunt for an envelope, but he could find one nowhere, and -nothing was to be done but to fold the sheet in the fashion that he had -known in his boyhood, and to seal it with sealing-wax. He burned his -fingers badly while performing the last-named operation. - -Still the postman had not arrived, and Ephraim, being very anxious to -mail his letter, resolved to go out and drop it into the letter-box at -the corner of the street. When he reached the corner, he found that -the letter-box had disappeared as so many other things had done; so he -resolved to push on to the post-office, where he could leave the letter -and get his morning’s mail. As he approached what he had supposed was -the post-office, he was dismayed to perceive that another building -occupied the site. The post-office had vanished. - -He turned to a man standing with a crowd which was observing him, and -asked him where the post-office could be found. Obeying the direction, -he sought the place and found it. Rushing to the single window, behind -which a clerk stood, he asked,-- - -“Are there any letters for Ephraim Batterby?” - -“I think not,” said the clerk; “there will be no mail in till -to-morrow.” - -“Till to-morrow!” shouted Ephraim. “What is the matter?” - -“The matter! nothing at all. What’s the matter with you?” - -“I am expecting letters from New York and Chicago. Are both mails -delayed?” - -“Chicago’s a place I never heard of, and the mail from New York comes -in only three times a week. It came yesterday, and it will come in -to-morrow.” - -“Three times a week!” exclaimed Ephraim; “why, it comes four or five -times a day, unless I am very much mistaken.” - -The clerk turned to a fellow-clerk behind him and said in a low tone -something at which both laughed. - -“How do you suppose the mails get here four or five times a day?” asked -the clerk. - -“Upon the mail trains, of course,” replied Ephraim, tartly; and then -the clerks laughed again. - -“Well, sir,” said the man at the window, “we don’t appear to understand -each other; but it may straighten things out if I tell you that the New -York mails come here upon a stage-coach, which takes twenty-four hours -to make the journey, and which reaches here on Mondays, Wednesdays, and -Fridays.” - -Ephraim was about to make an angry reply, but the clerk shut the window -and made further discussion impossible. For a moment Ephraim was -puzzled. He stopped to think what he should do next, and while he was -standing there, he noticed a curious crowd gathering about him, a crowd -which seemed to regard him with peculiar interest. And now and then -a rude fellow would make facetious comments upon Ephraim’s dress, at -which some of the vulgar would laugh. Ephraim was somewhat bewildered, -and his confusion became greater when he observed that all of the -bystanders wore knee-breeches and very ugly high collars and cravats, -in which their chins were completely buried. Ephraim perceived near to -him a gentleman who held in his hand a newspaper. Encouraged by his -friendly countenance, Ephraim said to him,-- - -“I am rather confused, sir, by some unexpected changes that I have -found about here this morning, will you be good enough to give me a -little information?” - -“With pleasure, sir.” - -“I have missed some important letters that I looked for from New York -and the West. I wish to communicate with my correspondents at once. -Will you please tell me where I can find the telegraph office?” - -“The telegraph office! I don’t understand you, sir.” - -“I wish to send messages to my friends at those points.” - -“Well, sir, I know of no other way to send them than through the -post-office here.” - -“Do you mean to say that there is no telegraph line from here to New -York?” - -“My dear sir, what do you mean by a telegraph line?” - -“A telegraph line--a line of wire on which I can send messages by -electricity.” - -“I fear something is wrong with you, sir,” said the gentleman gravely. -“No such thing exists. No such thing can exist.” - -“Nonsense!” said Ephraim, waxing indignant. “How do you suppose the -afternoon papers to-day will get the quotations of the Liverpool -markets of to-day? How will the brokers learn to-day the price of -securities at the meeting of the London Stock Exchange this morning?” - -“You are speaking very wildly, sir,” said the gentleman, stepping close -to Ephraim and using a low tone, while the crowd laughed. “You must be -more careful, or persons will regard you as insane.” - -“Insane! Why? Because I tell you, what everybody knows, that we get -cable news from Europe every day.” - -“Cable news! cable news! What does the old fool mean?” shouted the -crowd. - -“What do I mean!” exclaimed Ephraim, in a passion; “I mean that you are -a pack of idiots for pretending to believe that there is no such thing -as a telegraph, and no such thing as a telegraph cable to Europe.” - -The crowd sent up a shout of derisive laughter and rushed at him as if -to hustle him and use him roughly. The gentleman to whom he had spoken -seized him by the arm and hurried him away. When they had turned the -corner, the man stopped and said to Ephraim,-- - -“You appear to be a sane man, although you speak so strangely. Let me -warn you to be more careful in the future. If you should be taken up -as a madman and consigned to a madhouse, you would endure terrible -suffering, and find it very difficult to secure release.” - -“I _am_ perfectly sane,” said Ephraim, “and I cannot comprehend why -you think what I have said strange. I wanted my letters, and I wished -in their absence to correspond by telegraph, because I am expecting a -cargo of wheat to-day, which I am to ship to Liverpool by steamer.” - -“By steamer! There you go again. Nobody can know what you mean by -‘steamer.’” - -“Steamer! Steamship! A ship that crosses the ocean by steam, without -sails. You know what that is, certainly?” - -“I have heard some talk about a rattle-trap invention which used steam -to make a little boat paddle about on the river here; but as for -crossing the ocean--well, my dear sir, that is a little too ridiculous.” - -“Ridiculous! Why--” - -“Pardon me,” said the man, “I see you are incorrigible; I must bid you -good morning;” and he bowed politely and walked quickly away. - -“Well, well!” said Ephraim, standing still and looking after him -helplessly. “It’s queer, very queer. I don’t begin to understand it at -all, I am half inclined to believe that the world has conspired to make -game of me, or else that my poor wits really are astray. I don’t feel -as certain of them as a clear-headed man should.” - -While he spoke, the bells of the city rang out an alarm of fire with -furious clangor, and in a few moments he saw, dashing past him, an -old-fashioned hand-engine, pulled by a score or two of men who held -a rope. The burning building was not many hundred yards distant from -Ephraim, and he felt an inclination to see it. When he reached the -scene, men with leathern buckets were pouring water into the engine, -while other men were forcing the handles up and down, with the result -that a thin stream fell upon the mass of flame. - -He had an impulse to ask somebody why the steam fire-engines were not -used, but every one seemed to be excited and busy, and he remembered -what his friend had said to him about steamers. - -So he expressed his disgust for the stupidity of these people in a -few muttered ejaculations; and then, suddenly, bethought him of his -business. - -He resolved to go down to the wharf where he had expected to ship his -cargo, and to ascertain what the situation was there. - -As he came near to the place, he saw that it had changed since he last -saw it, but a handsome ship lay in the dock, and men were carrying bags -of grain aboard of her. - -“That must be my cargo,” he said; “but what on earth do they mean by -loading it in that manner, and upon a sailing vessel?” - -He approached the man who seemed to be superintending the work, and -said,-- - -“Is this Ephraim Batterby’s wheat?” - -The man looked at him in surprise for a moment, and then, smiling, -said,-- - -“No, sir; it is Brown and Martin’s.” - -“When did it arrive?” - -“Yesterday.” - -“By rail?” - -“By rail! What do you mean by that?” - -“I say, did it come by rail?” - -“Well, old man, I haven’t the least idea what you mean by ‘rail,’ but -if you want to know, I’ll tell you the grain came by canal-boat.” - -“From Chicago?” - -“Never heard of Chicago. The wheat came from Pittsburg. What are you -asking for, any way?” - -“Why, I’m expecting some myself, by rail from Chicago, and I intend -to ship it to Liverpool in a steamer--that is,” added Ephraim, -hesitatingly, “if I can find one.” - -“Chicago! rail! steamer! Old chap, I’m afraid you’re a little weak in -the top story. What do you mean by Chicago?” - -“Chicago! Why, it’s a city three or four hundred miles west of -Pittsburg; a great centre for the western grain traffic. Certainly you -must have heard of it.” - -“Oh, come now, old man, you’re trying to guy me! I know well enough -that the country is a howling wilderness, three hundred miles beyond -Pittsburg. Grain market! That’s good!” - -“I don’t know,” said Ephraim, somewhat feebly. “It used to be there. -And I expected a cargo of wheat from Chicago to be here this morning, -by railroad.” - -“What kind of a railroad?” - -“A railroad: iron rails, with cars propelled with steam! I expected to -find an elevator here to put the grain on board of an iron vessel; to -load the whole twenty thousand bushels to-day; but things have gone -wrong somehow, and I don’t understand precisely why!” - -“Bill,” said the man, turning to a young fellow, one of his assistants, -near him, “trot this poor old chap up to the mayor’s office, so that -he’ll be taken care of. He’s talking to me about bringing twenty -thousand bushels of wheat on a rail, and loading it in an iron -vessel--an iron vessel, mind you--in one day! It’s a shame for the old -fellow’s relations to let him wander about alone.” - -Before “Bill” had a chance to offer his assistance, Ephraim, alarmed, -and more than ever bewildered, walked quickly away. - -As he gained the street, a man of about middle age suddenly stopped in -front of him, and said,-- - -“Good morning, Mr. Batterby.” - -Ephraim had gotten into such a frame of mind, that he was almost -startled at the sound of his own name. - -He looked hard at the stranger, but, although the features were -somewhat familiar, he could not really recognize the man. - -“Don’t know me, Batterby? Impossible! Don’t know Tony Miller!” - -“Bless my soul!” exclaimed Ephraim; “Tony Miller! so it is! Tony -Miller! Not Tony Miller? Why--why--why, Miller, I thought you died -thirty years ago!” - -“Died! ha, ha! Not a bit of it, man. Why, it’s absurd! I saw you only -two or three weeks since!” - -“Strange, strange!” said Ephraim, almost sadly, in his mind trying to -recall some fragments of the past. “I could have sworn that you were -dead!” - -“No, sir; just as hearty and lively as I ever was. By the way, Mr. -Batterby, what has become of Ephraim? I don’t see him about any more.” - -“Ephraim? Ephraim Batterby? Why, who do you think I am?” - -“Joshua Batterby, of course; who else? You don’t seem very well to-day, -I think.” - -“He mistakes me for my father,” said Ephraim to himself. “When will all -this wild, puzzling mystery end?” Then, addressing Miller, he said, “I -would like to have some conversation with you, Miller; I am strangely -confused and upset to-day.” - -“Certainly; be glad to have a chat with you. I say, suppose you come -home and dine with me? I am on my way to dinner now. Will you go?” - -“Gladly,” replied Ephraim. - -As they walked on, Miller, with intent to break the silence, said,-- - -“I think we shall have rain to-day, Mr. Batterby.” - -“Perhaps; it looks like it. What does the signal service say?” - -“What does the _what_ say?” - -“The signal service. What are the indications?” - -“I haven’t the least idea what you mean, Mr. Batterby.” - -“Why,” said Ephraim, timidly, “were you not aware that a bureau in -the War Department collects information which enables it to indicate -approaching conditions of the weather, and that it gives this -information to the newspapers?” - -“Never heard of such a thing, Mr. Batterby, and I don’t believe it. -Somebody has been joking with you. The only weather indications we have -are in the almanacs, and they are not at all reliable.” - -The two walked along in silence for a time, and then Ephraim said,-- - -“Miller!” - -“Well?” - -“I am going to ask you a good many queer questions to-day, for a -private purpose of my own; will you agree to answer them candidly?” - -“If I can.” - -“And not to think me insane, or absurd, or stupid?” - -“Of course I should not think so.” - -“Very well,” said Ephraim; “and when we are done, I may explain why I -asked them, and perhaps you can solve a mystery for me.” - -They reached the house and entered it. The first thing Miller did -was to proceed to the side-board, fill two glasses with wine from a -decanter, and ask Ephraim to drink. - -“Thank you,” said Ephraim, “I never touch it.” - -Miller looked at him for a moment in amazement. He concluded that this -must be one of the phases of Batterby’s newly-developed queerness. So -he emptied his own glass and put it down. - -They entered the parlor to wait for dinner. Ephraim’s eye was caught by -a very pretty miniature on the wall. - -“Who is that?” he asked. - -“Mrs. Miller; my wife.” - -“Is it a photograph?” - -“I don’t know what a photograph is.” - -“Ah!” sighed Ephraim, “I remember. Let me ask you something else. Did -you ever hear of a place named Chicago?” - -“Never! there is no such place.” - -“You know nothing of railroads, or steamships, or telegraphs?” - -“You are talking Greek to me.” - -“Did you ever hear of a telegraph cable to Europe?” - -“Well, you _are_ asking queer questions, sure enough. No, I never did.” - -“Is there, or is there not, a railway line across the continent to the -Pacific?” - -“What a funny kind of an idea! No, there isn’t.” - -“Are there any such things as daily papers?” - -“No, sir.” - -“One question more: I see you have a wood fire. Do you never burn coal?” - -“Charcoal, sometimes, for some purposes.” - -“I mean hard coal--stone coal?” - -“There is no such thing in existence, so far as I know. What are you up -to, anyhow? Going to invent something?” - -“I will tell you after awhile, may be,” replied Ephraim; and then to -himself he said, “I am beginning to catch the meaning of all this -experience. How strange it is!” - -A lady entered from the front door, and passed the parlor. Ephraim saw -that she had on a very narrow dress, with a high waist almost beneath -her armpits, that she wore upon her head an enormous and hideous green -“calash” which bore some resemblance to a gig-top. - -He had not seen one of those wonderful bits of head-gear for fifty -years. - -In a few moments the lady entered the parlor. As Mr. Miller presented -Batterby to his wife, Ephraim was shocked to perceive that she seemed -to have on but a single, thin, white garment, and that even this -appeared to be in immediate danger of slipping downward. He thought it -shockingly immodest, but he remembered the figures of women he had -seen in the remote past, and thought he knew what this meant. So he -gave no indication of surprise. - -They went to the dining-room. Ephraim was very careful in conducting -his share of the conversation. Mrs. Miller, unlike her husband, had not -been forewarned. However, once, when she was lamenting the absence of -fruits and vegetables from the markets in winter, Ephraim incautiously -asked her why she did not use canned goods; and this opened the way -to some vexatious questions. A little later, Miller began talking -about the Warners, people whom Ephraim in his soul knew had been dead -forty years; and Miller had mentioned that two of them were down with -smallpox. Thereupon Ephraim asked if the malady was prevalent, and -if Miller had been vaccinated. And thus again he got into trouble, -for neither his host nor hostess knew his meaning. He was tripped up -again by a reference to sewing-machines; and, finally, by remarking, -innocently, when Miller observed that it had just begun to rain, that -he was sorry he had not his rubbers with him. - -But he would not try to explain his meaning when they pressed him. He -had, indeed, an increasing tendency to taciturnity. He shrank more -and more from the thought of attempting a discussion of the situation -in which some wondrous mischance had placed him. As Miller waxed -boisterous and lively in his talk, Ephraim was strongly impelled to -complete reserve. - -For he had creeping over him, gradually, a horrible feeling that these -people, in whose company he was lingering, were not real people; that -they were dead, and that by some awful jugglery they had been summoned -forth and compelled to play over, before him, a travesty of their -former lives. - -He became gloomy and wretched beneath the oppression of the thoughts -that crowded his brain. As the hour slipped away, his distress was made -more intense by the conduct of Miller, who, warmed with wine, mingled -oaths with his conversation. Ephraim felt as if that blasphemy came to -him clothed with a new horror from the region of mystery beyond the -grave. Finally, after Mrs. Miller had left the room, her husband’s -utterance became thick and harsh, and presently he slipped, drunken and -helpless, beneath the table. - -Ephraim sat alone at the board. The room grew darker, for the rain was -now swirling without, against the window-panes. There was something -ghastly and fearful in the appearance of the apartment. The outlines -of the furniture, seen through the dusk, were distorted and misshapen. -Ephraim felt as if he were in the presence of phantoms. He had the -sensations of one who sits in a charnel-house, and knows that he is the -only living thing among the dead. - -His good sense half revolted against the fear that overspread him; -but it seemed not strong enough to quell the tremulous terror in his -soul; for that grew and grew until it filled him with a kind of panic. -He had such a meaningless dread as the bravest know when they find -themselves amid darkness and loneliness in a dwelling wherein, of late, -have been pleasant company and merriment and laughter; wherein has been -joyousness that has suddenly been quenched by utter, dismal silence. - -He was seized by a sudden impulse to fly. He pushed away his chair, -and glanced timorously around him. Then he trod swiftly, and with a -fiercely-beating heart, to the hall-way. Grasping his hat from the -table, he opened the door, and fled out into the tempest. - -As he sped away through the gloomy street, now wet and slippery, and -covered with pools of rain, it smote his heart with a new fear to think -that even the city about him, with its high walls and impending roofs, -its bricks and stones and uplifting spires, was unreal to ghastliness. -But even his great dread did not forbid his mind to recall the -mysteries of the day. - -“I know,” he said, as he rushed onward, “what it all means. This -is the Past. Some mighty hand has swept away the barrier of years, -and plunged me once more into the midst of the life that I knew in -my youth, long ago. And I have loved and worshipped that past. Blind -and foolish man! I loved it! Ah, how I hate it now! What a miserable, -miserable time it was! How poor and insufficient life seems under its -conditions! How meanly men crawled about, content with their littleness -and folly, and unconscious of the wisdom that lay within their reach, -ignorant of the vast and wonderful possibilities that human ingenuity -might compass!” - -“There was nothing in that dreary past that I could love, -excepting”--and Ephraim was almost ready to weep as he thought that the -one longing of his soul could not be realized--“excepting those who -were torn from my arms, my heart, my home, by the cruel hand of death.” - -The excitement, the distress, the anguish, the wild terror of the -day, came back to him with accumulated force as he hurried along the -footway; and when he reached his own home he was distracted, unnerved, -hysterical. - -With eager but uncertain fingers he pushed open the front door, and -went into his sitting-room. There a fresh shock came to him, for he -saw his wife in the chair she had occupied in the old time, long, long -ago. She arose to greet him, and he saw that her dear face wore the -kindly smile he had known so well, and that had added much to his sum -of happiness in the years that were gone. He leaped to clasp her in his -arms when he heard the sweet tones of her voice welcoming him; his eyes -filled with tears, and the sobs came, as he said,-- - -“Ah, my dearest, my dearest! have you, too, come up from the dead past -to meet me? It was you alone that hallowed it to me. I loved--loved -you--I--” - -He felt his utterance choked, the room swam before him, there was -a ringing noise in his ears, he felt himself falling; then he lost -consciousness. - -He knew nothing more until he realized that there was a gentle knocking -near to him, as of some one who demanded admittance at the door. He -roused himself with an effort, and almost mechanically said,-- - -“Come in.” - -He heard a light step, and he opened his eyes. He was in his own -bed-room, the room of the present, not of the past, and in his own bed. -It was Nelly who knocked at the door; she stood beside him. - -“It is time to get up, grandpa,” she said. - -“Wh--where am I? What has happened?” Then, as his mind realized the -truth, he said, “Oh, Nelly, Nelly, how I have suffered.” - -“How, grandpa?” - -“I--I--but never mind now, my dear; I will tell you after awhile. Run -down-stairs while I prepare for breakfast. But, Nelly, let me tell you -not to believe what I said to you about the glories of the past; it was -not true, my child, not true. I have learned better; I talked to you -like a foolish old man. Thank God, my dear, that you live late in the -world’s history. No man is more unwise or more ungrateful than he who -finds delight in playing the part of An Old Fogy.” - - - - -MAJOR DUNWOODY’S LEG, - -AND THE GREAT POTTAWATOMIE CLAIM. - - -At Gettysburg, on the afternoon of the third day of July, 1863, Major -Henry G. Dunwoody, of the 483d Regiment of Pennsylvania Volunteers, -while leading his men into action, was struck by a shell from a -Confederate battery. A moment later he was lying upon the ground -unconscious, and beside him lay his left leg, severed from his body -several inches above the knee. - -When the fight was over for the day, the wounded Major was placed in -an ambulance and taken to the hospital. A day or two later, the fever -having left him, he lay in bed feeling tolerably comfortable. His mind -not unnaturally turned to consideration of his wound. He began to think -how very inconvenient it would be to have to hop about on one leg -during the remainder of his life, and he couldn’t help wondering where -his leg was and what would be its fate. He suspected they would bury -it; and the notion seemed an unpleasant one. - -“I don’t like the idea of being partially interred,” he said; “and -while I am alive, too. I am too young a man by half a century to have -one foot in the grave.” - -The latter suggestion struck the Major as being rather a good joke. He -resolved to remember it so that he could tell the surgeon. - -The Major could hardly persuade himself, at times, as he reflected, -that he had really lost his leg. He had a corn upon a certain toe which -he could distinctly feel; there were strong sensations which indicated -that the leg was still there, and he could hardly resist the impulse to -try to lift it in such a vigorous manner as to kick off the covering -of the bed. But he knew that this was absurd. While he was thinking -about it he suddenly gave a little start, and a shiver ran through his -nerves. He felt as if his leg had been plunged into some intensely -cold liquid, and before he had quite recovered from the shock he was -conscious of a faint suggestion of alcohol. Whether the perfume of the -substance had actually greeted his nostrils, or the alcoholic flavor -had been conveyed to his senses in some other way, he could not exactly -define. He did not try very hard to solve the problem. This was only -one of the many odd experiences of the first forty-eight hours, and he -was too feeble to make such a vigorous mental effort as was necessary -to their proper solution. - -The Major recovered, and was enrolled in the Invalid Corps. During the -succeeding three or four years he drew his pay, lived an easy life, -and devoted much of his time to experimenting upon artificial legs of -various patterns. He never succeeded in finding one that suited him -exactly, and in the course of time he collected quite a curious lot -of wooden and cork legs, which he kept standing about in the corners -of his room at his boarding-house in Washington, and which were -perpetually a source of nervous dread to the chambermaid, who lived -in expectation that some day they would fly out at her and kick her -downstairs. - -One day the Major, while strolling along the street, passed the door of -the Army Medical Museum, an institution into which has been gathered by -the government a very large number of medical and surgical curiosities -taken from the various battle-fields of the rebellion. It is the most -horribly interesting place in the city of Washington--that is, to the -ordinary lay observer. The surgeons and doctors, of course, regard its -trophies with gleeful enthusiasm. To others it serves perhaps a good -purpose in suggesting some distinct notion of the fearful suffering -which was the price paid for the salvation of the Government, and it -may perform a useful office in the future by indicating to persons who -are burning with a desire for war and glory, that glory is one of the -least obvious fruits of murderous strife. - -It occurred to the Major to enter the building; and for half an hour -he wandered about among the glass cases, studying curiously the -strangely distorted fragments of the poor human body which are there -preserved. As he turned the corner of one large case, he saw something -that induced him to halt. A brief distance in front of him sat a woman -intently engaged in drawing upon a piece of pasteboard which stood -upon a small easel. It was so unexpected a sight that the Major could -not resist the impulse to observe her for a moment. She seemed young -and fair; a mass of bright golden hair fell upon her shoulders, and as -she turned her head to look at something in one of the cases that she -seemed to be sketching, the Major saw that her profile was exceedingly -pretty. - -He came a step or two closer, and noticed by means of a hurried glance -that she had a strange figure of some kind upon the board; and then he -passed on. - -Just as he got close to her his artificial leg--a leg that he had -received a few days before by steamer from France--suddenly launched -out sideways. It encountered the foot of the easel, and the next -instant Major Dunwoody lay sprawling upon the floor, with the easel -across his back and the pasteboard picture lying upon his head. He -recovered himself promptly, and turning to the fair artist, who stood -above him with a look of mingled vexation and amusement upon her face, -said,-- - -“I--I--really I am very sorry. It is shocking, but I assure you I -couldn’t help it. I am suffering from a wound, and--and” (the Major did -not like to confess so openly to his dismemberment); “and in fact I had -not complete control of myself.” - -The Major was a handsome man, and either his appearance, his pleading -look, the pathetic tone of his voice, or all combined, touched the -artist’s heart with sympathy. - -“Oh, never mind,” she said, smiling, as the Major thought, more sweetly -than woman ever smiled before. “No harm is done. I hope you didn’t hurt -yourself.” - -“You are very kind. No, I am not hurt; but I am greatly mortified at -the trouble I have caused you. I hardly know how to express my disgust -for my clumsiness.” - -“Pray do not distress yourself about it,” said the artist, laughing; -“the easel is not broken and the sketch is wholly uninjured. I should -not have mourned if it had been destroyed. It is a mere study, and very -incomplete.” - -“You are too generous,” replied the Major; “but I will take good care -not to disturb you again, if I can find my way out of here. Would -you--would you--be--be--would you be good enough to call the janitor, -or somebody, to help to get me upon my feet again? I cannot rise -without--in fact, my wound is--is--” - -“I shall be more than glad to assist you,” said the artist, with a -glance of pity in her blue eyes, “if you will take my hand.” - -The Major looked at the hand for a moment. It was extremely pretty; he -had an impulse to kiss it, but he restrained himself. He merely clasped -it in his own. The artist braced herself firmly, and the next instant -the Major stood upright. - -“I do not know how I can thank you for your kindness,” he said, “but -permit me to offer you my card. I have some influence, and if I can -ever serve you in any way I shall greatly rejoice.” - -“Major Dunwoody! Indeed!” exclaimed the artist, as she read the name. -“You are not one of the Dunwoodys of Clarion County, Pennsylvania, are -you?” - -“I was born there,” replied the Major with not a little eagerness. He -thought he saw a chance to acquire better acquaintance with this lovely -and gifted woman. “Do you know any of our folks?” - -“Oh, yes,” said the artist, with a bright smile. “My mother came from -Clarion County. She was a Hunsicker, a daughter of Hon. John Hunsicker, -who represented the district in the forty-first Congress. I have often -heard her speak of the Dunwoodys.” - -“Indeed,” replied the Major. “I knew your grandfather well when I was a -boy.” - -The conversation need not be given in detail. The artist and the -Major developed at some length how a Hunsicker married a Dunwoody; -how a Dunwoody eloped with a Moyer, a cousin of the Hunsickers; how -a Dunwoody fought a duel with another Hunsicker over a political -dispute, and shook hands afterwards; and how the loves and hates, and -bargains and enterprises, and contests and schemes of the Dunwoodys and -Hunsickers had filled the history of Clarion County for a quarter of a -century past. - -At last the Major said,-- - -“But you haven’t given me _your_ name yet.” - -“Pandora M’Duffy is my name. My mother, you know, married Senator -M’Duffy, state senator. Poor father died many years ago, and we are now -living in Washington.” - -“Studying art, I presume?” asked the Major, glancing at the easel. - -“Yes,” replied Pandora; “I am an artist.” - -“Is not this rather--rather a--a queer place to come to for sketches?” - -“Oh, no,” said Pandora, laughing; “I came here to study anatomy for a -great picture I am going to paint. You see what that is?” said she, -lifting the cardboard, and showing the sketch to the Major. - -“That is a--a--I should say that was a picture of--well, of the elbow -of a stove-pipe. Isn’t it?” - -“You are not very complimentary,” said Pandora. “I know it is very raw -and unfinished; but it is at least a fair likeness of that human leg in -the jar of alcohol over there.” - -“Oh, of course! So it is, so it is; astonishing likeness! How stupid I -am! To be sure. The very image of it.” - -“Come now, I know you don’t think so! You are flattering me!” - -“No, indeed. It is wonderful! But--why, bless my soul, what on earth do -you want a picture of such a thing as that for?” - -“For my great painting,” said Pandora, with a pretty little laugh. “I -am preparing a picture, thirty-eight feet by twenty-seven feet, of -George Washington cutting down his father’s cherry-tree with his little -hatchet.” - -“What for?” - -“I expect to sell it to the Government, and to have it placed among the -other historical pictures in the rotunda of the Capitol.” - -“But you are not going to put this leg in the picture?” - -“Yes; I represent George as being barefooted, and having one -trouser-leg rolled up.” - -“But then, I don’t exactly see how--well, but George was a boy, and -this is a man’s leg.” - -“I know, but I am drawing all the figures on a heroic scale.” - -“Ah!” said the Major. Then he added, “But I must bid you good morning.” - -“I shall be very glad to have you come to see me,” said Pandora. - -“I assure you it will give me much pleasure to do so,” answered the -Major, with a feeling of exultation. - -Then he bowed politely, and withdrew. - -When Pandora reached home, she showed Major Dunwoody’s card to her -mother, and told her of the adventure at the Museum. - -Mrs. M’Duffy sat upon the sofa and listened. She was a woman of -distinguished appearance; of large frame, not corpulent, but rounded -rather more than positive beauty seemed to require. Having the carriage -of a queen, with a finely-shaped head, a strongly-defined chin, held -well up, an aquiline nose, and piercing black eyes, Mrs. M’Duffy -impressed the observer with a sense of power. The mother of the Gracchi -might have been such a woman. If Mrs. M’Duffy had been born to a -throne, she would have left her impress distinctly upon the history of -nations. - -Mrs. M’Duffy was familiar with the world. She was a woman who quickly -comprehended possibilities. She clearly foresaw that Major Dunwoody -might have an influence upon the future of Pandora, and the prospect -was not pleasing to her. - -“Pandora,” she said, “I trust you did not ask this man to call?” - -“Yes, I did, mother.” - -“I am sorry to hear it. I never liked _his_ branch of the Dunwoodys. -His father was mixed up with some very suspicious land speculations, -and he died insolvent. Major Dunwoody has nothing but his pay. You must -treat him with coolness when he comes.” - -“Why?” - -“Why! Why, because it is very necessary that you should give him -no encouragement of any kind. He is not a desirable match for you. -Besides, you owe it to your family now to offer every opportunity to -Achilles Smith. Mr. Smith worships you!” - -“And I hate him,” said Pandora, vigorously. - -“Hate him, my child? Why, how absurd! Mr. Smith is a very charming man, -and when he gets his Pottawatomie claim through Congress, he will be -rich.” - -“He will never get it through; and I won’t have him, if he does!” - -“Never get it through, Pandora! Didn’t General Belcher, the member -for the ninety-sixth Kansas district, and his bosom friend, assure me -positively that it would be approved during the present session?” - -“His claim is ridiculous. Congress will never allow it.” - -“My dear! Pray don’t be absurd! His claim is quite as reasonable as -thousands of similar claims. The Pottawatomie Indians scalped him in -1862, and he very properly asks the legislature of his country to -compel the savages to make reparation by surrendering two million acres -of their reservation. I cannot see anything ridiculous about that. If -he succeeds, he will be the largest individual land-owner in the West.” - -“If he succeeds!” - -“But General Belcher, who is pushing his case in Congress, and who -is to share the property with him, positively declares that he will -succeed. The General, also, makes your acceptance of Achilles the -condition of his championship of your picture. He says that Congress -shall buy that picture upon the day that you marry Achilles Smith!” - -“General Belcher is simply disgusting, mother. I would never think of -accepting a favor from him.” - -“Not when his exertions can lift you and your mother out of poverty, -Pandora? You talk most unreasonably.” - -“I mean what I say,” said Pandora firmly. - -“Very well, Miss, we shall see,” replied Mrs. M’Duffy, rising and -sweeping majestically from the room. - -Major Dunwoody called upon that very evening. He called again the next -evening. He called frequently upon following evenings; and although -Mrs. M’Duffy treated him with coldness which bordered upon disdain, -the Major’s infatuation for Pandora was so strong that he forgot Mrs. -M’Duffy’s incivility in rejoicing over the exceeding graciousness of -her daughter. - -The Major was convinced that Pandora loved him, but he hesitated to -take practical measures to ascertain the fact, because he could not -summon up a sufficient amount of resolution to tell her the truth about -the loss of his leg. He was far too honorable to deceive her respecting -his misfortune until she had committed herself to him, and he was -haunted by apprehension that she might reject him when she knew the -actual state of the case. A catastrophe brought matters to a crisis. - -One Sunday evening the Major escorted Pandora to church. During the -worship the Major felt his French leg give several very strange -twitches, and he could hear a clicking sound in the knee as if some -of the springs were loose and moving about in an independent manner. -Pandora noticed the noise too, and leaned over to ask the Major, in a -whisper, if there was not a mouse running about upon the floor of the -pew. The Major said he did not think there was. - -Pandora whispered that it sounded rather more like machinery. - -The Major faintly intimated that it might proceed from the gas meter in -the cellar, or perhaps the people in the gallery were fixing something -about the organ. - -The Major had always rather doubted the springs in the knee-joint of -the French leg. They impressed him as being far more complicated and -ingenious than was necessary for simple purposes of locomotion. He was -thinking about them tremulously when the sermon began. The preacher had -hardly announced his text when the Major’s leg suddenly flew up, kicked -the bonnet upon the head of the lady in front of him over the wearer’s -eyes, and finally the leg fell upon the top of the back of the pew, -where it kicked away vigorously. The Major, blushing crimson, grasped -it and pulled it down by a severe effort. The wearer of the bonnet -looked at him with indignation. Pandora seemed ready to faint. - -When the Major let go his hold of the leg it bounced up again, and -performed the most eccentric movements upon the back of the pew. -Pandora could not suppress a faint scream; and the entire congregation -stared at the miserable Major as he seized the leg and thrust it down -into the pew. He held it down firmly, but the springs were strong, and -they forced the toes to beat a wild tattoo upon the wooden partition -in front of them. - -In an agony of mortification, the Major rose, with the intention to -leave the building. The sexton, who had approached him to ascertain -the cause of the disturbance, gave him his arm, and the Major hopped -down the aisle with his horrible leg flying out behind and before in a -convulsive manner, kicking the sexton, banging pew-doors, and behaving -generally in a most sensational and exciting manner. - -Pandora followed her lover at a short distance. When the porch of -the church was reached, the leg was still in a condition of violent -agitation, and the Major, wild with shame and rage, said to the -sexton,-- - -“Take it off! Unbuckle it! Take it off quick!” - -The sexton bravely approached, fumbled about for a moment in search -of the strap, and an instant later the Major’s imported leg lay upon -the carpet squirming about, kicking viciously, and leaping hither and -thither like a wounded and desperate animal. - -“Call a carriage,” gasped the Major, as he leaned against the wall. - -The sexton dispatched a boy for a vehicle, and when it came he placed -the Major within, helped Pandora to a seat, and the party moved toward -home. - -For a little while neither the Major nor Pandora spoke. The situation -seemed too awful for words. The silence was becoming embarrassing, when -suddenly Pandora said,-- - -“Poor man!” - -“What, are you sorry for me?” asked the Major eagerly. - -“Indeed I am. How you must have suffered!” - -“I thought you would hate me for subjecting you to such mortification.” - -“But you couldn’t help it. I would be very unjust to blame you.” - -“And you do not dislike me because I am so crippled?” - -“How could I? You are a soldier. You lost your leg honorably, did you -not?” - -“It was shot away at Gettysburg.” - -“You lost it to save my country, and you think I would not honor you -for such a sacrifice?” - -“Your kind words make me brave. If I might dare--” - -“Such a hero as you may dare anything,” she said. - -“May I dare to ask if, while you honor me, you can also love me?” - -“You may; and if you do, I will answer ‘Yes.’” - -“You are an angel!” exclaimed the Major. - -They expressed their emotion in a very usual manner, which need not be -described. When the carriage turned into the street upon which Pandora -lived, she said,-- - -“Henry dear,--I may call you _Henry_, mayn’t I?--where _is_ your leg?” - -“I left it squirming about in the church porch.” - -“No; I mean your real one, dear. The leg that was shot off.” - -“I haven’t the least idea. Buried, I suppose.” - -Pandora was silent and thoughtful for a moment. Then she said,-- - -“Isn’t it barely possible that one of those legs preserved at the -Medical Museum is yours?” - -“Well, I declare I never thought of that! Perhaps mine _is_ there.” - -“The one I was sketching on the day I first met you was -labelled--‘Gettysburg, July 3rd, 1863.’ Maybe that was it.” - -“I will go around to-morrow and examine it. It would be very odd, -Pandora dearest, if it should be mine. Wouldn’t it?” - -“Very. But I want you to make me a promise. If it should be yours, will -you get it and give it to me?” - -“If I can I will. But what on earth do you want it for?” - -“For two reasons I want it: first, because if I am to marry you I have -a legal right to all of you; and, second, because my George Washington -has been standing upon one leg beside the cherry-tree for three weeks -now, for the reason that I can’t make a satisfactory study of his other -leg.” - -“Pandora, I will gratify you if human energy is equal to the task. The -impulses of an undying affection, not less than a fervid regard for the -interests of high art, shall nerve me to the work.” - -“Thank you, darling!” she said. - -Then the carriage stopped at the M’Duffy front door. Pandora alighted, -rang the bell, kissed her hand and disappeared, while the Major drove -home in ecstasy to brood upon his unexpected happiness, and to fit -himself with a Government leg that was numbered among the best in his -collection. - -The next morning he went around to the Medical Museum and examined -Exhibit 1307 in Case 25, being the leg which Pandora had proposed to -pass on to immortality by attaching a representation of it to her -picture of George Washington. - -The Major could not say with positiveness that the leg was his, but his -impression that it belonged to him was strengthened by certain scars -that seemed to be familiar, among them one which called up memories of -a dog-bite obtained in a Clarion County orchard away back in the years -of his boyhood. - -A thought struck him. He called the janitor, and slipping a coin -into his hand, he explained the case to that officer. At the Major’s -suggestion the janitor removed the specimen from the alcohol, and trod -heavily upon the excrescence upon the toe. The Major yelled with pain. -The identity of the limb was definitely ascertained. - -“I will recover possession of that leg,” said the Major as he left the -building, “if I have to buy the entire collection!” - - -CHAPTER II. - -General William Henry Harrison Belcher, member of Congress from the -ninety-sixth Kansas district, sat in his room at his hotel one evening, -with his feet upon the table, a cigar in his mouth, and a glass -containing a mysterious liquid preparation beside him. - -In appearance the General was a man of mark. His thick gray hair -covered a noble head; his nose was large and curved in bold lines -indicating strength; his face was closely shaven and rather inclined -to pallor. He had eyes that seemed to pierce the person upon whom -they rested, and when he used his feet to stand upon, instead of -devoting them to purely ornamental purposes, as at present, his figure -appeared tall and slender and comely. Those who did not know the -General imagined, when they saw him in the Capitol, that he was some -distinguished statesman upon whom rested the weight of a nation’s -business. Those who knew him, on the contrary, were aware that he was -a man of no education, no skill in higher politics, and no principles -worth mentioning. He had begun life as a mule-driver on the plains, -but one day he contrived to obtain a contract for supplying a certain -Indian agency with cattle. The Government paid him for fat steers, and -he furnished the oldest and leanest cows he could find west of the -Mississippi, and when they were weighed in pairs, he and his drover -stood on the scale each time so as to bring the aggregate weight up to -a comfortable figure. He made a small fortune at this business, and -then he bought his way into the Legislature, and subsequently into -Congress, his purpose being not so much to give his suffering country -the benefit of his skill as a legislator, as to open for himself -larger opportunities to acquire wealth at his country’s expense. He -had succeeded in several enterprises of the kind which had engaged -his attention since he came to Washington, and now he was devoting -attention to his great scheme for seizing the Pottawatomie Reservation -as a matter of retributive justice to its savage owners. As he sat in -his room, thinking upon the subject, he heard a knock at the door. - -“Come in!” said the General. - -Achilles Smith entered. - -“Hello, Kill!” said the General, still keeping his feet upon the table. -“Take a chair.” - -Mr. Smith sat down. - -“What’ll you have?” asked the General. - -“Cocktail.” - -“Mix one.” - -Mr. Smith prepared the beverage, placed himself swiftly outside of it, -elevated his feet until they rested close to those of the General, and -said,-- - -“Well, how does the old thing work?” - -“Oh, pretty well! tolerable! The Committee have promised to consider -your case to-morrow, and I want you to be on hand, ready to tell your -story. You’ve got it straight, I reckon?” - -“Yes, I know it by heart.” - -“Let’s see. Your theory is that you were scalped by a Pottawatomie -Indian in 1862. Now, where is that scalp?” - -“In my trunk. Between ourselves, you know, I bought it of an Indian in -Laramie year before last.” - -“Very well. Now, what is the name of the Indian who scalped you?” - -“Jumping Antelope, a chief.” - -“Under what circumstances?” - -“I was trying to convert him by reading the Scriptures to him.” - -“See here, Kill, isn’t that a little thin? He couldn’t understand the -language, you know. I’m afraid that won’t wash.” - -“I translated it as I went along.” - -“S’pos’n’ the Committee ask you to prove that you know the language?” - -“I’ll get off some gibberish, and you can assure them that you -recognize it as pure Pottawatomie.” - -“Very well. Now, what particular part of the--the--Scriptures were you -reading to him?” - -“I dunno. Let’s see; what are some of the books?” - -“Don’t ask me; I’m not very well posted. We used to have a Bible out -in the Kansas Legislature, to swear members on, but they always kept a -string tied around it, and after it was stolen a rumor got around that -the clerk swore a whole House of Representatives in on Kidderminster’s -Digest of the State Laws.” - -“Jonah’s the only book I recall very distinctly now.” - -“That’ll do, if you can remember something in it. I connect it -indistinctly with reminiscences of a whale.” - -“Yes. Well, I was trying to convert that Indian by reading to him about -Jonah and the whale, when he rose up suddenly and began fumbling about -my hair with a carving-knife.” - -“The Committee may go into detail. Now, why did he do this? Is the -narrative calculated in any way to excite the nervous system of an -untutored child of the forest?” - -“No-no-no!” - -“Nothing in it about depriving persons of their hair? Don’t say Jonah -was scalped, hey?” - -“No.” - -“Did your assailant accompany the act with any conversation?” - -“He merely remarked ‘How!’ and I thought I caught some rather -indistinct reference to the Happy Hunting Grounds; but I’ll only swear -to ‘How.’” - -“‘How!’ They always say that. It indicates almost anything, from -ferocious animosity to a desire to borrow plug tobacco. Then he took -your hair, did he?” - -“Sawed it right out, and would have murdered me if I had not fled.” - -“You dropped the Bible when you ran?” - -“Yes, after snatching my scalp from his hand.” - -“Well, Kill, I think maybe that yarn’ll pass. It’s not first-rate, but -there are three men in the Committee who want my vote for claims of -theirs, and I have an idea they’ll back us through thick and thin. My -boy, don’t call me a prophet if we don’t snatch that Reservation before -the session’s out. It looks to me like a sure thing.” - -“I’d like to be as sure of something else I’m after,” said Smith, -rather sadly. - -“What’s that?” - -“The M’Duffy girl.” - -“You shall have her, Kill, you shall have her. The old lady has -promised me, positively.” - -“I thought so myself at first, but there is another man in the way -now.” - -“Who is he?” - -“Oh, a one-legged army man. She’s taken a fancy to him, her mother -tells me. He has a leg up here in the Medical Museum, and she fell -in love with that first and it spread to the rest of him afterwards, -gradually.” - -“That’s original, anyhow.” - -“Wants to paint that preserved leg in her picture. Going to dovetail it -on to Washington. If he can get the leg out of the Museum she promises -to marry him.” - -“Well, _I’ll_ put a stop to _that_. I’ll introduce a bill forfeiting to -the Government for ever all the odd legs in the Museum. Kill, you mind -what I tell you, and Pandora shall make _you_ her model instead of this -military ruin who is sparking her.” - -“I’d like to feel certain of that.” - -“You may; depend on me. A man with my war record needn’t fear to offer -himself to any--what is this fellow? Major, hey?--Well, I’ll risk -offending any major in the service.” - -“I didn’t know you had any war record.” - -“Ain’t I a General?” - -“Oh, I know, but you can’t throw a brick in the street without mowing -down a couple of Generals--peace men from principle.” - -“But I have seen war, my boy! I was in the army, only as a Captain, I -admit. But I smelt powder. Kill, I was distinguished for one thing: -other officers always lost their men, but I never had a fight that I -didn’t bring out one-third more men than I took in.” - -“You ought to have been promoted. Was it your war record that took you -to Congress?” - -“No, sir; it was brains--pure intellect--that did that. You know my -district? Not a railroad in it. Not enough business to pay for the -grease on the engines if there was a railroad. Of course, under such -circumstances, the one thing all the people want worse than anything -else is a railroad. People always want what they can’t get.” - -“Of course.” - -“So as soon as I was nominated I hired four hundred men, divided them -into squads, fitted them out with rods and chains and theodolites and -other surveying apparatus, and started them all over the district, -pretending to run lines. A squad would burst into a man’s potato-patch -and go to work. The owner would rush out and say, ‘What in thunder you -fellows a-doin’ in that potato-patch?’ And they’d say, ‘We’re surveying -the route for old Belcher’s railroad.’ Then the man would fly into -the house and tell his wife that Belcher was going to run a railroad -through his property, and they’d go wild with joy. Kill, I carried -that district by fifteen hundred majority over a man who under other -circumstances would have beaten me out of my boots.” - -“That was genius, sir! nothing but pure genius.” - -“I think so; genius for statesmanship; not such statesmanship as they -have in the played-out despotisms of Europe, but the kind that is -needed in a new country.” - -“I say, Belcher, how would it do for you and me to go around and call -on old Mrs. M’Duffy? I’ve a notion to go.” - -“I’m willing. Maybe we can settle the case of that dilapidated Major.” - -Mrs. M’Duffy was at home when the General and Mr. Smith called, and she -received them with much cordiality. - -The conversation naturally turned at an early moment to the subject of -Smith’s claim. - -“By the way, Mr. Smith,” said Mrs. M’Duffy, “your claim rests, I think -you said, upon the fact that you were scalped? Your head has not that -appearance.” - -“Oh, no! You see, madam, that in the lapse of years the wound has -healed; a new scalp has gradually formed, so that now I appear to be -merely bald. I have the original scalp at home in my trunk.” - -“How very interesting. Were you ever scalped, General?” - -“No, ma’am, never. My custom has been to take scalps, not to lose them.” - -“The General is an old Indian fighter,” observed Achilles. - -“I was not aware of the fact,” said Mrs. M’Duffy. “You are familiar -therefore with the plains. Did you ever visit the Pottawatomie -Reservation--Mr. Smith’s prospective property?” - -“Frequently, ma’am. It’s the handsomest tract of ground east of the -Rocky Mountains.” - -“You propose to live on it, when you get it, do you not, Mr. Smith?” - -“On part of it. Half goes to the General; then I shall reserve 5000 -acres for myself and dispose of the remainder to settlers. If I am -successful in my suit with your daughter I shall build a house in the -centre of my 5000 acres, and we will live there. We shall have plenty -of elbow-room. She can paint pictures as big as all out-of-doors, and -bigger.” - -“Pandora is _so_ fond of the open country.” - -“Yes, madam, she can get half a dozen squaws to do her housework, so -that she can have all her time to herself. I am going to arrange it so -that she can shoot grizzly bears from the parlor window, if she wants -to; and as for wardrobe!--well, I intend to buy all our clothes in New -York, and they’ll be of a kind that’ll cause every woman on the old -Pottawatomie Reservation to turn green with envy.” - -“Pandora ought to appreciate your kindness,” said Mrs. M’Duffy; “but -she is a strange girl, and, I fear, thinks more of her art than of the -matters that commonly engage a young girl’s attention.” - -“By the way, ma’am, how is the great picture coming on?” - -“Slowly. Pandora made the handle of the hatchet more than twice as -thick as the tree, and she had to alter it. A connoisseur, a friend -of hers, also pointed out to her that in fore-shortening Washington’s -right leg she had made his foot appear to be resting upon a mountain -upon the other side of the river. Corrections of this kind require -time.” - -“She must hurry up, ma’am; she must hurry up,” said the General; “I -have everything fixed to obtain the consent of Congress to its purchase -by the Government. I am going to press the resolution as soon as I hear -that she has accepted Smith.” - -“You are _too_ kind. Do you think it is likely to be favorably -received? Mrs. Easby told me yesterday that Judge Cudderbury said that -if George Washington could have foreseen Pandora’s picture he would -have had incorporated into the Constitution of the United States a -section making it a felony to represent him as within a thousand miles -of a cherry-tree. But then the judge, you know, has a daughter who -professes to be an artist.” - -“Jealousy, ma’am! sheer jealousy. The judge knows no more about art, -anyhow, than a Colorado mule knows about the sidereal system. Now, _my_ -opinion, Mrs. M’Duffy, is, that old Michael-what’s-his-name, over -there in Rome, couldn’t hold a candle to your daughter in the matter of -covering canvas.” - -As the General was speaking, the door opened, and Pandora entered. She -spoke politely, but coldly, to the visitors, and after the passage of a -few remarks about the condition of the weather, the General withdrew, -Mrs. M’Duffy followed him to the hall to bid him adieu, and Mr. Smith -remained with Pandora. - -It occurred to Achilles that if Mrs. M’Duffy should happen to fail to -return this would be an uncommonly good opportunity to speak of the -state of his feelings. The thought pleased him, but it gave him some -embarrassment. - -“Miss Pandora,” he said, “I am glad to hear that you are succeeding so -nicely with your picture.” - -“Thank you; it _is_ making some progress. I have been delayed by a few -trifling alterations.” - -“Is the central figure completed yet?” - -“Not quite finished. I did not feel sure about the left leg, and I -shall make some studies before I paint it in.” - -“If you have any difficulty with that portion of the figure, why not -omit it? Put in a bush, or a stone, or the trunk of a fallen tree, so -as to hide the leg. Congress will accept it all the same.” - -“Art scorns such devices. And, besides, it would be rather too -ridiculous to represent Washington standing astride of a log while he -is cutting down a cherry-tree.” - -“True! true! That did not occur to me. What you really want is a good -model. I think I could recommend one.” - -“I have one already, thank you.” - -“Indeed! A plaster of Paris one?” - -“No; a real one.” - -“A real one?” - -“The property of a friend of mine; a gentleman.” - -“On or off?” - -“Off.” - -“Humph! That seems to me--a--a--rather a queer offering to a lady.” - -“Do you think so?” - -“I am a plain man, not used to flattering women, but if I wished to -express my regard for a lady I would offer her my heart instead of my -leg.” - -“It would be dreadful if the lady happened not to want any portion of -you, wouldn’t it?” - -“Yes; but suppose I should offer her the Pottawatomie Reservation -besides, do you think she would refuse?” - -“You had better undertake the investigation yourself. How can I know?” - -“I _will_ undertake it now. I offer my heart to _you_! I offer the -Reservation also. I love you, Pandora. Oh, how I love you! Will you be -my wife?” - -“Mr. Smith, it is impossible.” - -“No, not impossible, Pandora. Not impossible. Do not say that; it -will kill me. Listen! Have you ever dreamed of a home upon the wide -and boundless prairie? A sweet little home, two stories and an attic, -painted white with green shutters, where you can see eighteen miles -in a straight line, where two hundred acres in potatoes lie beneath -your very window, and where you can hunt the bounding buffalo and the -prairie-hen without going off the estate; and where copper-colored -servant girls can be had for two dollars a month and found? Have you -ever dreamed of such a home?” - -“Never.” - -“It is to it I would bear you as my bride. Come with me! Be mine! I -cannot offer you the enervating luxuries of the depraved and decaying -East, but together we can feast upon jerked beef and buffalo tongues; -together we can drink draughts from the Artesian well in the cellar; -together we will sit beneath the tree by the front door, the only -one within twenty-seven miles, and together we can watch the dog -chasing the jackass-rabbits across the sage brush. Be mine, and I will -stock the pantry with rations from the nearest Indian agency, where -I have a friend; I will buy you a suave and gentle mule for you to -exercise yourself on, and you may have canvas enough to paint General -Washingtons and Lord Cornwallises as high as church steeples, and I -will guarantee that Congress shall bid them in as fast as you turn them -out. Will you, Pandora? Do you like the promise? Oh, say that you love -me!” - -“Mr. Smith, I cannot. I am very sorry, but to tell the truth plainly, I -am engaged to another gentleman.” - -“To Dunwoody?” - -“I did not mention his name, sir.” - -“But I know him! A one-legged Major! And you refuse me for him?” - -“I refuse you; that is enough.” - -“Oh, very well, Miss M’Duffy. I understand you. I will bid you a -very good evening. I hope you will not have occasion to regret your -decision.” - -“Certainly I shall not! Good evening, sir!” - -As Achilles passed out through the hall he encountered Major Dunwoody, -who was just placing his hat upon the rack. Achilles looked back at -him for a second, scowling with rage and mortification, and then as he -rushed into the open air, he said to himself,-- - -“Never mind, you hopping, mud-headed, military humbug. I’ll settle -_your_ case before you’re many days older.” - -And then Mr. Smith went home to bed. - -Pandora greeted the Major with a joyful smile. - -“Darling,” said the Major, “who was that person I passed in the hall as -I came in?” - -“That was Achilles Smith, the man of whom I told you. He proposed to me -a few moments before you came in.” - -“He did, did he?” exclaimed the Major savagely. “I wish I had known it. -I would have kicked him down the steps.” - -“But how could you, dearest, with only one leg?” - -“True!” said the Major. “But I could have thrashed him with my cane. So -he wants to marry you, does he?” - -“Yes, and mother thinks I ought to accept him.” - -“And you have firmly made up your mind to marry me?” asked the Major, -fondly. - -“Yes, dear,” said Pandora, with a roguish smile, “but only when you -have succeeded in getting for me your disconnected leg. You will try to -get it for me soon, Henry, won’t you?” - -“I am trying now, my sweet. Colonel Dabney, of the Maine delegation, -has already introduced to the House of Representatives a bill -appropriating my leg to me.” - -“How splendid!” - -“And he says it will pass promptly, so that I can obtain the leg within -less than two months. We’ll be married right off then, won’t we?” - -“At once. But I’m afraid, Henry, Mr. Smith and General Belcher will -oppose Colonel Dabney’s bill if they hear of it.” - -“I’ll brain both of them if they do,” said the Major. “No, I won’t -brain Smith; he has no brains. And now, Pandora, darling, let us talk -of something else. Are you sure, my dearest, that you love me _very_, -very, _very_ much?” - -“Oh, Henry! ten thousand, thousand times more than I can ever tell you. -I--” - -A person passing the parlor door at this juncture might have heard a -sharp sound resembling somewhat that made by the tearing of a piece -of muslin. The conversation need not be quoted at greater length. It -appeared to give the most intense pleasure to the Major and Pandora, -but talk of that kind is usually rather dreary for outside parties; so -we will lower the curtain here. - - -CHAPTER III. - -About a week later, Colonel Dabney reported, with a favorable -recommendation to the House, from the Committee on Public Property, “An -Act restoring a certain amputated limb in the Medical Museum to Major -Henry G. Dunwoody.” The Act specified the leg contained in Exhibit -1307, Case 25, as the property to be restored. - -When the bill came up for discussion, General Belcher moved to lay it -upon the table. Defeated. Then he moved to amend it with a provision -that the bone of the leg should be withdrawn and retained in the -Museum. Rejected. Then he offered a resolution referring the whole -matter to a committee of inquiry, which should be directed to sit for -two years, and to take testimony as to what had been the practice of -governments in the matter of surrendering legs blown off in battle, -from the time of Sennacherib down to the battle of Sedan, including -evidence respecting the custom in Persia, Greece, Egypt, Rome, -Carthage, Palestine, and modern Europe. After a spirited debate the -resolution was lost. But the General was not discouraged. He presented -another resolution, that a special committee be directed to inquire -whether the person mentioned in this bill was the same Major Dunwoody -who, in a fit of alcoholic frenzy, in Clarion County, Pennsylvania, -in 1866, treed his aged grandfather one rainy night, and compelled -that venerable and rheumatic person to roost upon a lofty branch until -morning. Voted down: Yeas 304; Nays 1 (General Belcher). - -The bill finally passed to a third reading, and was adopted. When -it had received the approval of the Senate and the President, Major -Dunwoody drove round to the Museum in high glee with Pandora. He -carried in his pocket an empty pillow-case, in which he proposed to -take home with him the long-lost fragment of himself. When he found the -janitor and presented his credentials, that official was exceedingly -polite, and at once led the way to the place where the treasure was -kept. - -While he was unlocking the case, Pandora could hardly repress her -feelings of joy. Leaning upon her lover’s arm, and watching the -janitor, she exclaimed,-- - -“Isn’t it elegant, dear? I can hardly realize that we are really going -to get it! Mother will be so glad when George Washington has his other -leg on.” - -“I wish I had _my_ other one on,” said the Major, pleasantly. - -“So do I. It’s too bad! But you can stand it up on the table and look -at it now as much as you want to, can’t you, darling?” - -The janitor lifted down the huge jar containing the limb, and took it -out of the spirits. - -“I feel,” said the Major, as he unfolded his pillow-case, “as if I was -in a cemetery, disinterring one of my near relations.” - -“So beautiful! Isn’t it?” said Pandora. - -The Major suddenly scrutinized the leg closely. - -“Why, how--how’s this? I don’t exactly understand--let’s see, janitor, -this is Exhibit 1307? Yes. Case 25? Yes, Case 25; so it is. Why, -Thunder and Mars! (excuse my agitation, Pandora,) there must be -something wrong about this!” - -“Wrong, Henry? How?” - -“Guess not, sir,” said the janitor. “This is what the bill calls for.” - -“But it can’t be, you know. I lost my left leg, and this one you had -in the jar here is a right leg. I couldn’t have had two right legs, -Pandora, of course!” - -“I do not know, dear. Some persons have peculiarities of formation -which--” - -“Oh, well, now, be reasonable. I am absolutely certain that my leg was -a left leg in every particular. You see, Pandora, this is a matter -about which I may fairly be considered an authority.” - -“Yes, Henry, but--but maybe being in the alcohol so long may have -changed it.” - -“Impossible. Quite impossible, Pandora. The annals of medical science, -from Esculapius down, contain no record of such a thing. The leg is not -mine.” - -“But you might as well take it, dearest, mightn’t you, because my -George Washington ought to be finished as quickly as possible?” - -“You don’t want to put two right legs on him, too, do you?” - -“I don’t know, Henry, I might. People won’t look at his toes; -and if they did, they would regard the arrangement as one of the -eccentricities of genius, perhaps.” - -“Let us look about,” said the Major. “Perhaps my leg is in one of these -other cases. Why, here it is! Sure enough! In Case 1236, Exhibit 11. -That is mine. You’ll let me have it, Mr. Janitor, of course?” - -“Can’t do it, sir; I have to follow the Act of Congress carefully. I -daren’t go outside of it.” - -“Well, this is too bad!” exclaimed the Major. “You positively won’t -give it to me?” - -“No, sir; I won’t.” - -“Well, then, Pandora, there is nothing to do but to wait. I’ll get -Colonel Dabney to put another bill through at once. Let me get the -numbers: Exhibit 11, Case 1236.” - -Then, taking Pandora upon his arm, the Major hobbled to his carriage -and drove straight to the Capitol. - -About three weeks later another bill passed the House without -opposition, General Belcher being absent in New York upon a Committee -of Inquiry. While the measure was pending in the Senate, Achilles -Smith, one morning, at an early hour, entered a rear door of the -Museum with a key which he had obtained by bribing the charwoman, and -proceeding to Case 1236, he removed the leg from the jar No. 11, and -put it in another jar in another case, replacing it with the leg that -had been in the latter jar. - -He went down-stairs chuckling. “You mutilated outcast, you,” he said, -addressing the Major in imagination; “we’ll see who’ll beat at this -game!” - -When the Act had been signed by the President, the Major drove with -Pandora to the Museum a second time. Upon reaching Case 1236 he was for -a moment stricken dumb with amazement. Presently he said,-- - -“Why, Pandora, my dear, do you see? It’s the leg of a colored man!” - -“Ye--e--es, it seems to be, Henry. But perhaps mortification or -something has set in.” - -“It is very mysterious. I can’t account for it.” - -“One of your legs was not colored, was it, my love?” - -“Oh, no, of course not!” - -“Perhaps the janitor here has tarred it over, to preserve it better?” - -“No, ma’am; that’s not allowed in this institution.” - -“You’ll take it anyhow; won’t you, Henry?” - -“Oh, my dear, be reasonable. Take the leg of a negro for mine!” - -“Well, but, Henry, I can paint it white in my picture.” - -“Yes; but, Pandora, you know we won’t care to have particles of -fractured Africans scattered about our house. We can have no cherished -memories associated with a leg like this.” - -“I suppose not; but it seems rather hard that my Washington should have -to stand upon that one leg at least a month longer.” - -“He won’t mind it. He was heroic. He would have stood upon a solitary -leg for centuries rather than have robbed another man of his members.” - -Pandora sighed deeply, and made up her mind to try to be resigned; and -so they went downstairs, and drove away to state the case to Colonel -Dabney. - -The Colonel, after hearing the story, distinctly affirmed the opinion -that there had been foul play. The Major jumped at the suggestion, -and told him of General Belcher and Achilles Smith, and their designs -respecting Pandora. - -“Never mind; I will defeat their plans,” said the Colonel. “You shall -have the leg next time, if it is still in existence, no matter who -meddles with it.” - -The next Act reported by Colonel Dabney provided that Major Henry G. -Dunwoody should have authority to take possession of his leg wherever -it could be found, in any institution under control of the Government. - -General Belcher made a long and eloquent speech in opposition to the -bill. - -He referred to the heroes of the past. Who ever heard of Epaminondas -prowling about in search of a leg lost in honorable warfare? Did -Leonidas return from Thermopylæ to seek the aid of the national -legislature in an effort to recover members of his body that had been -hacked off? Hannibal was fairly torn to pieces, but he would have -scorned to go fishing in alcohol jars for them. Cæsar, Alexander, -Wallenstein, Wellington, General Jackson, were all mighty warriors, but -he had yet to learn that they ever stooped to begging their respective -governments for mangled remains that had been preserved for the -instruction of medical men and the alleviation of the sufferings of the -human race. No, it was reserved for this obscure American militiaman, -who was gravely suspected of fiendish barbarity to an aged and infirm -grandsire, and who had been charged with hiding behind a baggage-wagon -at Gettysburg, to begin this ghoulish practice of grasping for legs -that had been solemnly dedicated to the uses of our common country. - -He would direct attention to the remarkable and mysterious -circumstances surrounding this case. It was admitted even by the -friends of Major Dunwoody that he had _one_ leg. Two other legs had -been awarded him by separate Acts of Congress. That made three. He -had in his hand a receipt for two artificial legs supplied to Major -Dunwoody by the Government, making five; and he was credibly informed -that the Major had recently appeared at a church in the capital wearing -a French leg, with which he performed some extraordinary, not to say -scandalous, feats during the service. Thus there was positive evidence -that this person had already in his possession six legs, and now he -was demanding from Congress permission to take a seventh. He appealed -to the House, was it reasonable that one man should be allowed to -have seven legs? Would it look well for this House to announce to the -country that it was willing to rifle the Medical Museum in order to -confer an additional leg upon a man who was the owner of six others? -He could understand such legislation if men were constructed like -centipedes, but it seemed to him more than monstrous, positively -iniquitous, indeed, to vote away the pathetic and instructive remnants -of our glorious heroes for the purpose of furthering the insidious, -perhaps treasonable, designs of a man who had enough legs of various -kinds already to make three ordinary men comfortable. - -When the General concluded his remarks, Colonel Dabney replied, and -stated the facts of the case plainly and forcibly. The bill was passed -by a handsome majority. - - -CHAPTER IV. - -Upon the very same day, General Belcher’s Act indemnifying Achilles -Smith for the loss of his scalp by removing the Pottawatomie Indians -from their reservation, was squeezed through the House by a majority -of two votes. The bill provided for the immediate withdrawal of the -Indians from their reservation in the Indian Territory, and the -location of the tribe upon another reservation in Colorado, in a -part of the country which is absolutely a desert, without water or -shrubbery, and wholly unfit for the residence of any animal of a higher -grade than a rattlesnake. - -By some means the information of the action of the House was conveyed -to the Pottawatomie chiefs, and they expressed to their agent their -disgust in very strong language. The agent was scared, and he sent to -Fort Gibson for a company of cavalry to protect him. The commander -could spare but ten men. When the Indians discovered the approach of -the soldiers they imagined that a force was coming to drive them from -their homes, and accordingly they attacked the squad, killed all but -one man, and then the entire tribe went upon the warpath. - -The Government took instant action. The Indians numbered about one -thousand warriors. The force sent to crush them included not more -than two hundred cavalrymen. The Indians were mounted upon fleet and -hardy ponies, which could endure an incredible amount of fatigue and -live upon grass. The cavalrymen bestrode horses which had performed -service in New York omnibuses and upon St. Louis horse-cars, and which -could hardly be driven faster than six miles an hour under stress. -The Indians were armed with telescope rifles, breech-loading, and -warranted to kill at three-quarters of a mile. These had been furnished -gratuitously in time of peace by a beneficent Government. The soldiers -were armed with short-range carbines, and with sabres which were about -as useful in fighting savages who never came within gun-shot as a -fishing-rod would have been. The Indians carried upon their ponies what -food they wanted. The military force was encumbered by ambulances and -several wagons carrying camp equipage. In a fight at close quarters -the soldiers could have beaten their adversaries easily. In a race, -which permitted no other fighting than occasional skirmishing, all -the chances were on the side of the Indians; and a race was what the -combatants were in for. - -Just before the expedition was ready to start, General Belcher, by -bringing some influence indirectly to bear, succeeded in having -Major Dunwoody detailed to accompany it in command of the Commissary -Department. The Major was wild with vexation and disgust. - -“Pandora, darling,” he said, “you know that I was to get my leg -to-morrow, and that we were to be married within the month?” - -“Well! Won’t we? Is anything wrong?” - -“Wrong! Why, my dear, I have just received from the War Department -orders to accompany the expedition against the Pottawatomies. I start -to-morrow for Fort Gibson.” - -“How can you ride, with only one leg?” - -“I am to command the Commissary Department. I shall have to ride in an -ambulance. This is the fault of that accursed Smith. Why didn’t he and -Belcher let the Indians alone?” - -“And we can’t be married, then, until you return?” - -“I don’t see how. Isn’t it outrageous? I have the worst luck of any man -in the army.” - -Pandora looked as if she were going to cry. - -“And your leg? Won’t you get that until you come back?” - -“Yes, dear, I will take it out of the Museum this evening, and you can -amuse yourself throwing it upon the canvas while I am gone.” - -“Oh, that will be so nice!” - -“So nice that I am gone?” - -“Oh, Henry! How could you think I meant that?” - -“I didn’t; I was only jesting. And you will think of me sometimes?” - -“Yes, oh yes; every moment of the day.” - -“And you love me very much?” - -“Indeed, indeed, I do!” - -“My darling!” - -“My dearest!” - -Probably the curtain might as well drop again at this point. - -The expedition started from Fort Gibson. It marched straight across the -Indian territory to the Pottawatomie Reservation. The savages had moved -off, about a day’s march ahead of the soldiers, toward the northwest. -The military pressed forward; the Indians kept always just a little in -advance. The two forces crossed into Kansas. The troops pressed their -omnibus horses a little harder, and came within sight of the Indian -rear-guard. Then the savages spurred up and increased the interval -between them and the pursuers. - -The Pottawatomies headed for Colorado, and crossed the line in a few -days, with the soldiers the usual distance behind. Just after passing -the Colorado border, the Colonel commanding resolved to steal a march -upon the foe. One night, instead of going into camp, he pressed on -until twelve o’clock, and then halted upon the bank of the Arkansas -River. - -Four omnibus horses succumbed under the strain, and ere morning dawned -some Pottawatomies crept into the camp and stole six mules. - -The most degraded Indian was never known to steal a New York omnibus -horse, even in the dark. - -The next day the four dismounted troopers were placed in an ambulance, -and the pursuit began again. The Indians fled up through Colorado into -Wyoming Territory, and the Colonel commanding pushed after them, going -faster and faster every day. By the time he reached Fort Russel, just -over the edge of the Wyoming line, the route of his march was marked -with a succession of omnibus and car horses in various stages of decay. -At the Fort he obtained fresh horses, and sacrificing the baggage -wagons, keeping only the ambulances, he pressed on. - -On the 27th of August his scouts discovered the Indians in camp in a -valley a few miles ahead. The Colonel resolved upon a surprise. When -everything was arranged the troops charged down upon the village with a -wild hurrah. Not an Indian could be seen. The soldiers, however, burned -the lodges and withdrew. Upon their return they found that in their -absence the Indians had stampeded their mules and all their ambulances -but one, which Major Dunwoody had saved by hard driving. - -The chase was resumed with greater heat than ever. So far there had not -been a chance for anything like a fight. In fact, not a dozen savages -had been seen. - -Within a week or two Wyoming was traversed and Montana Territory -reached. There, just beyond the Crow Indian Reservation, the first -Pottawatomie of the campaign was slain. He sneaked into the camp one -night, and while cutting loose one of Major Dunwoody’s mules, the mule -kicked him upon the head and killed him. - -On the 6th of October the soldiers had marched for thirty-six hours -without rest, and it was believed that they would at last strike a -telling blow upon the savages. Everything was ready for a fight, and -the troops were full of eagerness for the fray. While they were halting -for water upon a small creek, a friendly Gros Ventre Indian came in -with the information that the fugitive Pottawatomies had crossed the -British line and were now safe from pursuit within the dominions of Her -Majesty. - -The Colonel and his officers and men fairly tore the English language -into shreds in their efforts to express with the necessary emphasis -their appreciation of the facts of the situation. - -The “war” cost the Government a little less than a million and a -half dollars, omnibus horses included; and it was estimated by -well-informed persons that the flying Indians, while upon the route, -destroyed private property to the amount of half a million more, -besides killing and scalping a party of eighteen emigrants which was -passing through Wyoming. - -It seemed like rather a large price to pay for Mr. Achilles Smith’s -scalp. - -Some time during the month of September, while the chase was in -progress, Achilles called at the house of Mrs. M’Duffy in Washington -and asked for Pandora. He said,-- - -“Miss M’Duffy, I come upon a somewhat painful errand, but I have a duty -devolving upon me, and I must perform it.” - -“No bad news from Major Dunwoody, I hope, Mr. Smith?” - -“I am sorry to say there is.” - -Pandora’s eyes filled with tears. Her face became pale. - -“What is it?” she asked. - -“I have here a dispatch to the Secretary of War, saying that in a fight -with the Indians, on last Wednesday week, Major Dunwoody--” - -“Not killed! Oh, please don’t say he was slain! I can’t bear it.” - -“No, not killed. Major Dunwoody has lost his other leg and his right -arm.” - -“How terrible!” screamed Pandora; then she wept bitterly. - -“Terrible, indeed!” replied Smith in a sympathetic tone. “But you know -this is the fortune of war. This it is to be a soldier.” - -“Poor Henry! How he must have suffered! Do you know how he is? What are -the chances of recovery?” - -“The dispatch says he is doing very well. But of course he will be a -mere wreck.” - -“It is dreadful, too dreadful!” - -“Perfectly helpless, too. A mere burden upon those who will have to -take care of him.” - -“Not if they love him!” - -“But surely you--you do not intend to cling to such a--a--such a -disintegrated ruin as he?” - -“I shall be true to him unto death.” - -“I had hoped,” said Achilles sadly, “that now that Dunwoody is reduced -to about one half his original dimensions, I might hope to have you -consider my claims.” - -“Never! It can never be!” - -“Because I am about moving out on the Pottawatomie Reservation, and -with you as my bride I could make it a little paradise here below. If -you will take me, the Reservation is yours in fee-simple.” - -“I scorn the offer, sir!” - -“You scorn it, do you? Scorn the most splendid tract of land in the -Mississippi Valley for the sake of marrying half of a man, whom you’ll -have to carry to church in a market basket and to feed with a spoon!” - -“Yes, sir. I scorn it and you. For to you and your wicked schemes -against the unoffending Indians, this awful, this dreadful suffering -of Major Dunwoody is due. I hate you! Yes, I hate you! Leave the house -this instant, sir!” - -Smith withdrew, and as he closed the door Pandora fell upon the sofa -and cried as if her poor little heart would break. - -Enter Mrs. M’Duffy. - -“Pandora, my child, what is the matter?” - -“Didn’t that horrid Smith tell you?” - -“What horrid Smith? I don’t know any such person. If you mean Mr. -Achilles Smith, why, he didn’t tell me anything. I have not seen him.” - -“Poor Major Dunwoody has had his arm shot off.” - -“What! Not another limb lost! Why, the man is falling apart in -sections.” - -“And that’s not the worst of it.” - -“Not the worst? Why, my child, what do you mean?” - -“His other leg has been amputated.” - -“Humph! Well, that’s agreeable news. No legs and only one arm. Pity -they didn’t amputate his head at once. I suppose, of course, you will -break your engagement?” - -“Oh, mother! How can you be so unkind?” - -“Pandora M’Duffy, you must be insane. Marry a man with only one limb. -How is he going to waddle around? Do you intend to carry him under -your arm, in a bundle?” - -“He will go on wheels, of course,” said Pandora with brimming eyes. - -“On wheels! A Hunsicker and a M’Duffy married to a man on wheels, and -who has to slide on the banister when he wants to come downstairs! Why -don’t you accept Mr. Smith at once? He is intact, I believe, with the -exception of his scalp. This family seems to be haunted by men who are -more or less in piecemeal.” - -“I would rather die than marry Smith.” - -“You might do it for your mother’s sake, so as to be near to her.” - -“Near to her? What do you mean?” - -“Why, I came in to tell you, my child, that I have accepted General -Belcher’s hand. I shall marry him, and we shall probably spend -our summers at his prospective country seat upon the Pottawatomie -Reservation.” - -“General Belcher!” exclaimed Pandora in disgust; “I never thought, -mother, it would come to _that_!” - -Then Pandora swept out of the room, with her handkerchief to her eyes, -leaving the majestic Mrs. M’Duffy in a condition of some uncertainty as -to her daughter’s theory respecting the degree of humiliation which had -been reached in her contract with the General. - -“But I know he is rich, and that he has a promise of an appointment as -Minister to Peru, where he expects to speculate in bark,” said Mrs. -M’Duffy to herself. - -The Secretary of the Interior Department at that period was an -especially capable officer. He obtained by some means a clue to the -secret of the movement against the Pottawatomie Reservation, and he -followed it industriously by means of his agents. Late in the month of -October he had probed the matter to the bottom, and he gave it to the -newspapers. - -The entire conspiracy of General Belcher and Achilles Smith was -exposed, and an indignant nation discovered that the costly struggle -with the Pottawatomies had not even so slight a basis of justice on the -part of the Government as a real injury done to Achilles Smith. It was -ascertained that Smith had not been scalped at all. He had merely had -his hair pulled at the Pottawatomie agency by a muscular squaw whom he -was trying to cheat out of her fair allowance of rations. - -It became clear that a Congressional investigation would be ordered -before the year was out, and Achilles Smith fled. General Belcher’s -conduct excited so much indignation at Kansas, that the politicians, -following the popular lead, turned on him. He was arrested and tried -upon a charge of bribery, and was committed. When on his way to -prison he knocked down his custodian, took the first horse he came -to, and started due South. It is supposed that he went to Mexico. The -feeling in Kansas is that the unhappy land of the Montezumas has yet -to experience her bitterest woes. It will be a charming country to -emigrate from when General Belcher begins to feel at home. - -Early in November Major Dunwoody obtained release from his duties and -came to Washington. He had not warned Pandora; he wished to surprise -her. When he called he withheld his name from the servant. Pandora -entered the room slowly. When she saw her lover she gave a little -scream of joy and flew towards him. Before reaching him a thought -struck her. She paused and seemed astonished. - -“What’s the matter, darling? Aren’t you glad to see me?” - -“Yes, but what--what--why--Henry dear, how is it you have your leg with -you?” - -“I always keep it by me, sweet. It is so convenient to have it along. -You have the other one, you know.” - -“But, Henry, you appear to have both arms, too.” - -“I brought them to hug you with, you angel, you.” - -She flew into them, and after a brief moment expended in exercising -their lips, Pandora looked up into the Major’s face and said,-- - -“You know, dear, I heard that you had lost your other leg and one of -your arms. I cried about it for a month.” - -“Who gave you that information?” - -“That scandalous story-teller, Achilles Smith.” - -“Smith, hey! Is he still around? That young man is actually suffering -for somebody to macerate him.” - -“And you’re not hurt a bit, are you, deary?” - -“I am a little dyspeptic from too regular dieting upon salt pork so -tough that it creaked when I swallowed it; but that’s all.” - -“Oh, Henry, you don’t know how glad I am!” - -More osculatory exercise at this juncture; but we will not stop to -consider it, satisfactory as it appeared to be. - -“And now, my love,” said the Major, as they sat together on the sofa, -the Major’s right arm encircling Pandora’s waist, “tell me about -everything.” - -“Well, let me see. First of all--you know, mother?” - -“Yes.” - -“Well, she is going to marry Colonel Dabney.” - -“You don’t say so?” - -“Yes; she _was_ engaged to General Belcher, but--” - -“Not old Belcher of Kansas?” - -“Yes; but he proved a rascal, so she discarded him, and now she is -engaged to Colonel Dabney. Splendid, isn’t it?” - -“Perfectly splendid. By the way, have you copied my off leg yet?” - -“Oh, yes; long ago.” - -“Then your picture is done?” - -“Yes, Henry dear, but--” - -“What! Isn’t it satisfactory, after all?” - -“It is to me, darling, but Colonel Dabney says Congress will never -accept it.” - -“Why not?” - -“He seemed embarrassed when I asked him the reason, and he turned the -subject.” - -“Absolutely hopeless, is it?” - -“Colonel Dabney says so.” - -“What will you do with it?” - -“I don’t know, dear; what do you think?” - -“Couldn’t you alter it into something else?” - -“I thought of that. It occurred to me that maybe I might turn it into -the Execution of Mary Queen of Scots and get the Canadian Government to -buy it.” - -“Not a bad idea.” - -“Paint in different clothes, you know, on Washington, and fix up the -tree somehow into Mary Queen of Scots. I think the hatchet will do as -it is--do for the executioner’s axe, you know.” - -“I see. It’s a good notion.” - -“Mother said she thought I might make it a battle between a Crusader -and a Saracen, but the tree is in the wrong position for a person -supposed to be fighting.” - -“Won’t do at all, of course.” - -“When General Belcher was here he said he believed that by painting -the grass red so as to represent fire, and making a mast with -rigging out of the tree, it might pass for the Boy who stood on the -Burning Deck--Casabianca. But the Canadian Government would not care -particularly about the Boy who stood on the Burning Deck, would they, -Henry?” - -“I have a dim idea that they wouldn’t.” - -“I think I’ll stick to Mary Queen of Scots.” - -“And now about our wedding?” - -“I’m ready.” - -“Name the day.” - -“Will next Thursday do?” - -“Admirable. So, next Thursday you will be my darling wife.” - -“And you will be my sweet, splendid husband.” - -“Pandora!” - -“Henry!” - -Another fall of the curtain appears to be necessary just here. We will -ring it down. If it could have been raised again a glimpse might have -been caught of a pretty room in which sat a lovely and smiling woman by -the side of a table, sewing. Close to her sat a handsome young soldier, -with one leg upon the floor. His other leg bobbed about in a huge jar -that rested in a corner. Pandora M’Duffy had been transformed into Mrs. -Major Henry G. Dunwoody, and she was happy. - - - - -“JINNIE.” - -A STORY OF A CHILD. - - -“Jinnie! Vir-r-rginia-a-a! You ‘Jin’! If you’re not here in a minute, -I’ll whip you within an inch of your life!” - -It was the shrill voice of Mrs. Tyke. Down from some mysterious part -of the recesses of the house it came with the force and precision of -a rifle-ball, through the narrow hall and open door to the ears of -Jinnie, who was scrubbing the front steps. - -Why Mrs. Tyke desired that the steps and the pavement should be -scrubbed upon that cold and dismal December morning cannot be imagined. -Probably she herself could not have given a reason for it if she had -been asked. The bricks looked very clean and wholesome before the work -began, and the marble steps were almost painfully white. Now, the -pavement was covered with a film of ice upon which pedestrians slipped -and were provoked to anger, and the steps were positively so icy as to -be unfit for use. - -The voice of Mrs. Tyke gave fresh impetus to the arm of the child, -who was just giving a few finishing wipes to the uppermost step. She -was a little child, surely not more than eight years of age. As she -knelt upon the marble, rather painful prominence was given to a pair -of shoes which might once have been the property of Mrs. Tyke herself, -but which were now worn, as forlorn and riddled wrecks, upon feet which -were stockingless. The thin little legs above the leather ruins were -blue with cold, and the tiny arms which wielded the wiping-cloth with -accelerated speed were bare and chapped to redness. - -If it was an offence to cover a pavement with ice upon such a morning, -it was a bitter wrong to compel a little child so poorly clad to -perform the work. - -Before Jinnie had replaced her cloth in her bucket, Mrs. Tyke appeared -in the doorway with anger in her face. She took hold of one of the -child’s ears with her coarse fingers and pulled her into the hallway -head foremost with as much force as if she had been shot out of a -catapult. Then Mrs. Tyke, with a vigorous hand, boxed the ear that -she had pulled, cuffed the other ear, impartially, knocking the child -against the wall. - -“I’ll teach you to mind me when I call you! Pottering and fooling with -your work! Now you go right out into the yard and scrub those bricks -in a jiffy, or you’ll know how the broom-handle feels.” - -Mrs. Tyke was going to have the back-yard scrubbed also. Why Mrs. -Tyke did not scrub the four walls of the house, and the roof, and -the chimney flues and the fence, and why she did not scrub the -cobble-stones in the street, is an impenetrable secret. - -Jinnie picked up the bucket, and went staggering through the hall, into -the kitchen, with a feeling that her head might at any moment tumble -off, as a result of Mrs. Tyke’s blows, and roll upon the floor. She -refilled her bucket at the hydrant, and began her work with a vigor -that promised to make Mrs. Tyke’s back-yard within a few moments a fit -place for skaters. - -Just before the work was done, Mrs. Tyke appeared at the window with -her bonnet on, and in a severe tone gave Jinnie some directions -respecting the preparation of dinner during her absence. Then Mrs. Tyke -withdrew, and just as the front door slammed Jinnie saw the head of a -child appear over the top of the partition fence, between the yards of -Mrs. Tyke and Mrs. Brown. - -Young Miss Brown watched Jinnie putting away the scrubbing implements, -and when Jinnie drew near to the fence with an apparent purpose to have -some conversation, the little Brown said: - -“It’ll pretty soon be Christmas, now.” - -“Will it?” said Jinnie, without manifesting any trace of interest in -the fact. - -“Yes, and Kris Kingle is coming to our house. Mamma said so. Does Kris -Kingle come to your house on Christmas?” - -“Nobody ever comes to our house but the milkman. He is not Kris Kingle, -is he?” - -“Oh, no! Don’t you hang up your stockings on Christmas eve?” - -“I have no stockings to hang up.” - -“Where does Kris Kingle put all your pretty things, then?” - -“He don’t bring me any. Who is Kris Kingle?” - -“Why, don’t you know? He comes in a sleigh full of toys, pulled by -reindeer, and--” - -“Where does he come from? Ohio?” - -“I guess so. But he comes down the chimbley every night before -Christmas, and--” - -“I expect our chimbley must be too little. Or maybe he don’t know we -live here.” - -“Oh, he knows where everybody lives; all the little children.” - -“I’m _so_ sorry he forgets me! Maybe it’s because I have no stockings! -Oh, I wish, I wish I had!” - -“Won’t Mrs. Tyke lend you one of hers?” - -“I’m afraid to ask her. I wonder would Kris Kingle come if I put a -bucket there for him?” - -“I never heard of his giving toys in a bucket. If he gave you a large -doll maybe he would. Have you got a large doll?” - -“I never had any doll. I made one once out of a dust brush and some -rags, but Mrs. Tyke whipped me and took it away. If I had a real doll -I’d be so happy that I couldn’t stand it.” - -“If Mrs. Tyke whipped you for it that would keep you from being too -happy, wouldn’t it?” - -“Yes.” - -“Why didn’t you ask your mamma to write to Kris Kingle to come?” - -“I never had a mamma; and no father, either. I was born in an asylum, -and Mrs. Tyke always says it’s a pity I was ever.” - -“Maybe he’d come if you’d pray to get him.” - -“I only know ‘Now I lay me.’ I learned it at the asylum; but I daren’t -say it out loud any more.” - -“I don’t know what we can do about it, then.” - -Jinnie began to cry; but suddenly remembering the imminent probability -of Mrs. Tyke’s return, she wiped her eyes with a rag of her dress, and -said,-- - -“Good-bye; I must go in now. I have to get dinner.” - -So she ran into the kitchen, and the head of the youthful Brown slowly -descended until it was eclipsed by the fence. - -Jinnie went to work to prepare the vegetables for dinner, with her -poor little brain in such a stir of excitement about Kris Kingle and -the possibility of his remembering her or forgetting her, that she -could hardly keep her mind upon the task that her hands were doing; -but she was recalled from her dreams by the sound of Mrs. Tyke’s step -in the hall; and as Mrs. Tyke perceived that she had not been very -industrious, Mrs. Tyke promptly boxed her ears. She fell to the floor, -and then Mrs. Tyke kicked her two or three times. This energetic -treatment effectively dispelled all of Jinnie’s visions of Kris Kingle. -She had rarely had any information upon which to build pleasant -thoughts of what life might have been to her; and now when her little -mind was taking its first flight into those realms of imagination -wherein so many of the forlorn of earth find at least a taste of -happiness, the red and vigorous hand of Mrs. Tyke hurled her back once -more into the dreary and dreadful reality of life. - -For the rest of the day Jinnie hurried through her myriad duties with a -tremulous fear upon her that if she should dare even to think of that -mysterious being who loved the little children she might invoke still -further blows. The blows came at any rate, more than once, despite her -carefulness; but that was always a part of her experience, and she bore -them perhaps a little better now because she was looking forward with -a faint suggestion of happiness to the night, when she should lie -beneath the scant covering of her bed, and think without fear of harm -of the reindeer and sleigh and the toys of the kind old man, who might -perhaps not forget her this time. - -When supper-time came Mrs. Tyke ordered her to go to the baker’s for -bread. The shop to which she had been accustomed to go was closed, -for some reason, and Jinnie sought another, upon another street. On -her way home through the dusky thoroughfare she came suddenly upon a -show-window brilliantly lighted, and filled with childish splendors -belonging to the Christmas season. - -She had never seen so many beautiful things before. There were toys -of all kinds, some of which she understood and some of which were all -the more fascinating for the mystery that surrounded them. There were -wagons and horses, and miniature tea-sets, and pop-guns, and baby -houses, and jumping-jacks, and railroad cars, and tin steamboats, and -make-believe soldier caps; and these were mingled with clusters of -glass balls of various colors, which glittered in the gaslight in a -most wonderful manner. But the glory of the window was a huge waxen -doll dressed as a bride, in pure white, with a veil and a wreath and -the loveliest satin dress. She had real golden hair and the softest -blue eyes, that stared and stared as though they were looking into some -other surprising show-window over the way. - -Jinnie trembled when she saw this marvellous doll. She had no idea -that anybody ever wore such wonderful clothing as that. She had never -dreamed that anything could be so beautiful. She thought she would be -perfectly happy if she could stand there and gaze at it during the -remainder of her life. Oh, if Kris Kingle would come and leave her -such a doll as that! No, that could not be; it was impossible that she -should ever have such a joyful experience. But maybe he might bring her -a doll like some of the smaller and less splendid ones which surrounded -the bride in swarms. Yes, she would be satisfied with the very poorest -one of them. She would hide it somewhere, under her bed covering, -perhaps, where Mrs. Tyke could not see it, but where she could find it -and kiss it and hug it and take it close in her arms when she went to -sleep at night. - -The thought of Mrs. Tyke came to her like a blow in the midst of her -delight. She remembered that she must hurry homeward, and so taking a -last, long look she turned and ran along the pavement, her heart filled -with a wild, passionate longing that Kris Kingle would come to her and -bring her something she could love. - -Of course Mrs. Tyke greeted her with angry words and two or three -savage thumps. She expected that. But Mrs. Tyke was not content with -this. When she sat down to supper she told Jinnie that as she had -been unusually idle and bad that day she should go hungry to bed. Then -Mrs. Tyke ate a particularly hearty meal, with the child watching her; -and when she had finished she sat by, growling and threatening, while -Jinnie cleared away the tea-things preparatory to being marched off to -bed. - -Jinnie missed her supper sadly, but she did not mind the hunger so much -on that night, for her mind was busy with new delights. - -It was dark in her room, but she knew where the chimney was; and before -she undressed she went over and felt it. There was a hole there for a -stove-pipe, but it had paper pasted over it. - -“Perhaps,” said Jinnie, “Kris Kingle did not come because the hole was -shut.” - -He would not come down the chimney and out into the dining-room, she -knew, because he would have to go through the stove; and that would -burn him, and his toys, too, perhaps. She thought it might be an -inducement for him to come if she should punch a hole through the -paper. She was afraid to tear it off, afraid of Mrs. Tyke’s vengeance; -so she pushed her finger through it. Then she undressed, and went -hopefully to her bed upon the floor. - -But not to sleep; she was too greatly excited. She began to wonder why -it was that life was so terrible. She never imagined that her life -differed from those of other children. It is the peculiar infamy of -brutality to a child that the victim does not know how to sound the cry -for the help that is almost always near to it. It accepts its lot as a -thing of course; it does not know that there are perhaps within a few -short steps of its house of suffering hearts that would stir with wrath -for its wrongs, and that there is within reach a law which would bring -retribution upon the head of its oppressor. - -Jinnie believed that all childhood was a time of punishment and misery. -She saw other children playing in the street who seemed merry and -joyous, and she could not understand why they were so. She remembered -the Brown girl, also, and how she had heard her sometimes laughing -and singing. Jinnie could not laugh and sing in her house with Mrs. -Tyke near her. She thought the other children might be happy because -they had dolls, and because they could have their stockings filled at -Christmas time. She knew that grown-up people were not abused as she -was, but it seemed such a long, long time to wait until she was grown -up. She felt that when she was she would be kinder to children, and not -strike them with the poker, at any rate, as Mrs. Tyke sometimes struck -her. - -And if Kris Kingle should come down into her room through the hole in -the paper, she thought she would like to be awake and to ask him to -take her away with him in his sleigh somewhere. As she dwelt upon this -she pictured herself going up the chimney and then flying over the -roofs behind the reindeer, and looking back at Mrs. Tyke standing at -the window and cursing her. And so she fell asleep and into a tangled -maze of dreams, wherein Kris Kingle, Mrs. Tyke and the doll-baby bride -were mingled in great confusion. - -Jinnie’s first thought in the morning was the last that she had upon -the night before. But as she hurriedly dressed herself it flashed -across her mind that as there was grave peril that Kris Kingle might -not come to her, perhaps it would make matters surer if she should go -to him. - -The milkman, whose cry she expected every moment, to her seemed a -likely person to know where Kris lived, and to take her there. Young -Miss Brown had rather indicated that Kris’s home was in Ohio; but -whether Ohio was a little piece up the street or millions of miles -away, or whether it was a house or a stable or a town, she did not -know. The milkman had spoken pleasantly to her sometimes, and he had a -wagon. It was not as attractive as a sleigh with reindeer, but she had -often longed to ride in it. She determined to speak to him. But when -he came and she opened the door with a beating heart, he snatched the -pitcher from her hand and frowned while he filled it. He was thinking -of some offensive suggestions made by Mrs. Tyke upon the preceding -evening in reference to his too intense partiality for water; and he -seemed so cross that Jinnie was afraid to speak to him. - -She came into the house again sorrowfully, but with a strong purpose -to seek some other means of reaching Kris Kingle; and she carried -this determination with her stubbornly through all the fatigues and -hardships of the day. - -About four o’clock in the afternoon Mrs. Tyke went out. Jinnie felt -that her time had come. She resolved to make an effort to find Kris -Kingle, to tell him of her longing desire, and to return home again -before Mrs. Tyke got back. She put her woollen hood upon her head, -wrapped around her shoulders the thin and faded rag which Mrs. Tyke -dignified with the name of a shawl; and then she concluded to take a -newspaper with her, so that if Kris Kingle showed any disposition to -urge the doll-baby upon her in advance of Christmas, she could have -something to wrap it in. - -When she came out of the house she crossed the street so that she could -notice particularly whether there was anything in the construction of -the roof of Mrs. Tyke’s dwelling which would be likely to discourage -Kris Kingle from attempting to reach the chimney. She saw that the -roof was much lower than the roofs of the houses upon each side of -it, and that it sloped at a sharp angle toward the front, while they -were flat. The chimney, also, was certainly smaller than others in the -vicinity, and the conclusion reached by the child’s mind was that Kris -Kingle had probably been indisposed to take the risks of running his -sleigh upon so precipitous a roof for the sake of descending such a -very narrow chimney. - -This gave a fresh impulse to the child’s purpose to visit Kris Kingle, -so that she might plead with him to make a call at Mrs. Tyke’s despite -the inconveniences of the construction of the house. It occurred to -her that she might possibly arrange for him to come to the front door -and ring the bell, when she would come softly down stairs and open to -receive him. - -While she thought of the matter she walked quickly up the street, now -somewhat gloomy in the early dusk, but before she had gone far she -reflected that she ought to inquire the way to Ohio before the darkness -should come. She paused to speak to two or three men who were hurrying -by, but evidently they thought she intended to ask alms of them, and -so they would not pause to listen to her. She was discouraged; but at -last she saw a boy standing by a street lamp, doing nothing, and she -resolved to ask him. - -He laughed rudely at her question and walked away. A moment later he -turned and threw a snowball at her. It hit her in the face and hurt -her badly; and her foot slipping upon the icy pavement, she fell. A -moment elapsed before she was able to rise; but at last she got up, and -although she was cold and weak and greatly discouraged, she thought she -would press on. She might never have so good a chance again; and if she -did not see Kris Kingle now, Christmas would come, and he would come -and go, and there would be no doll for her. - -While she was standing there, in a very miserable frame of mind, a -nicely dressed lady went past her. Presently the lady turned and looked -at her; then she came back to where Jinnie stood and spoke to her. - -“What is your name, my child?” asked the lady. - -“Virginia, ma’am. But Mrs. Tyke generally calls me Jinnie.” She had -never heard so sweet a voice. It seemed so beautiful, so gentle, so -full of tender pity, that it thrilled her with a strange joy. - -“And where are you going?” - -“I am going out to Ohio, to see Kris Kingle.” - -The lady smiled; but the smile faded into a look of deep compassion, -and she said,-- - -“Did your mother let you come away from home?” - -“I have no mother. I’m a bound girl.” - -“Who sent you to find Kris Kingle?” - -“Nobody. He always forgets to come to our house, so I was goin’ to put -him in mind.” - -“Don’t you get any toys or candy on Christmas?” - -“No, ma’am. Mrs. Tyke won’t give me any, and Kris Kingle forgets me. -And I never tasted candy but once.” - -“Is Mrs. Tyke the woman you live with?” - -“Yes, ma’am.” - -“Does she treat you kindly?” - -“Whips me and knocks me down sometimes.” - -“Will you go back to her?” - -“Oh yes, ma’am. I am going right back as soon as I see Kris Kingle.” - -The lady took her hand and resolved to go back with her, and to see the -terrible Mrs. Tyke. She told Jinnie so, and Jinnie submitted, although -she was grieved to forego her errand. - -“Do you know who Kris Kingle really is?” the lady asked. - -“Yes; he brings nice things down the chimbley to children.” - -“He does better things than that, my dear. The real Kris Kingle is the -Christ-child.” - -“Who is He?” - -“Did you never hear anybody tell of Christ?” - -“No, ma’am.” - -“He is God. He came down here to live upon earth, where He suffered and -died for us. He loved little children, for He was Himself once a child.” - -“Was He little, like me?” - -“Yes.” - -“How did He suffer?” - -“Wicked men insulted Him and beat Him and killed Him.” - -“Did they beat Him and strike Him like they do me?” - -“Yes, my poor child.” - -“What makes Him love me? Because I am beaten just like He was?” - -“Yes, yes, that is it. But He loves everybody, good and bad.” - -“He doesn’t know Mrs. Tyke, does He?” - -“He knows everybody in the world.” - -“Where is He now?” - -“Up in Heaven.” - -“Is that farther than Ohio?” - -“Yes, that is far, far away in the skies.” - -“Then how does He get here? I always thought the real Kris Kingle came -down chimbleys.” - -“He comes in your heart, my dear child. You will understand it all some -day.” - -The lady seemed strangely moved as she said this to Jinnie; but she -said nothing, and led Jinnie through the street, towards the child’s -home. - -When Jinnie and her companion reached Mrs. Tyke’s house and rang -the bell, Mrs. Tyke herself came to the door and opened it. As soon -as she saw Jinnie she poured out at her a volley of abusive words, -without regarding the presence of the lady who accompanied her. The -lady remonstrated with Mrs. Tyke, and then Mrs. Tyke assailed her with -her tongue. The lady then told Mrs. Tyke that she knew of the cruel -treatment to which the child had been subjected, and that she would -interfere if it was repeated. - -Jinnie was astonished that any one should be so bold as to speak with -so much severity to Mrs. Tyke. The response made to this threat by Mrs. -Tyke was to seize Jinnie by the arm, to drag her suddenly into the -hallway, and to slam the door in the lady’s face. - -The lady stood upon the step and listened. She could hear Mrs. Tyke -beating the child and cursing her; and then the sounds receded, as if -Mrs. Tyke were dragging Jinnie into a room at the end of the hallway. -Mrs. Tyke was in a paroxysm of fury; and she intended to visit upon -Jinnie the vengeance she would have liked to inflict upon Jinnie’s -unknown friend. - -Beating was too common and too tame a form of punishment. Mrs. Tyke’s -ingenuity devised a more terrible one. She made the child remove her -shoes, and then she tied her upon a chair, with her naked feet within a -few inches of the hot stove. In that position she left Jinnie, who bore -the frightful pain bravely, until presently she fainted. - -If there is no hell, what is going to become of people like Mrs. Tyke? - -When Jinnie regained consciousness, Mrs. Tyke sternly ordered her to -go up to bed; and Jinnie crawled up the staircase slowly and painfully -upon her hands and knees, suffering so much that she could hardly help -screaming aloud. - -She reached her room at last, and flung herself down upon the bed. -Her pain was so great that it was a long while before she could go to -sleep; and she lay there thinking with all her might about Kris Kingle -and the doll baby, and her adventures in the street, and wondering if -she would ever be any happier. Then she remembered what little Miss -Brown had said about praying, and what the sweet lady had told her -about the Christ-child and His wondrous love; and so she thought she -would try to pray to Him; and praying, she fell asleep. - -The lady who brought Jinnie home turned away with her soul filled with -indignation at Mrs. Tyke’s cruelty to the child, and she determined to -have it ended. She knew a man, Thomas Elwood, who was active in the -service of the Society for Protecting Children from Cruelty, and she -went to his house. He was a very plain Friend; a young man, and of a -fair countenance. He was at home with his wife, and both expressed deep -interest in the visitor’s story. The visitor left with the assurance -from Elwood that the case would receive attention early the next -morning. - -Next morning, when Mrs. Tyke called Jinnie, Jinnie tried to rise, -but found that she could not: she was too feeble and wretched. Mrs. -Tyke saw this, and she did not compel Jinnie to get up. Mrs. Tyke was -beginning to be frightened. So Jinnie fell asleep again, and when -she awoke it was broad daylight, and a man with what seemed to be an -angelic face was standing beside her. It was Thomas Elwood. Jinnie was -startled; her first impression was that this was Kris Kingle, come in -answer to her prayer. But when Jinnie looked at the finger-hole she -had made in the fire-board and at the man, and particularly at the -circumference of his hat, it seemed to her impossible, if this was Kris -Kingle, that he should have come in by way of Mrs. Tyke’s chimney. - -Thomas Elwood spoke to her and asked her if she suffered much. She said -yes, and then she asked him if he really was Kris Kingle. - -Thomas smiled and said,-- - -“No, dear child; but I am thy friend, and I am going to take thee away -from this misery and keep thee until thee is well again.” - -Then he lifted Jinnie in his arms, bore her downstairs and out, and -placed her in a carriage. - -“Where is Mrs. Tyke?” thought Jinnie. Mrs. Tyke was at a magistrate’s -office, listening to Mrs. Brown and others of the neighbors while they -testified of her brutal treatment of Jinnie. The lady who had brought -Jinnie home was there also; and Jinnie was kindly pressed by the -magistrate to tell what Mrs. Tyke had done to her. - -Mrs. Tyke gave bail and went home. Thomas Elwood took Jinnie to his -own house, and his wife wept as he told her how the child had been -tortured. She carried Jinnie upstairs and washed her, and dressed her -in clothes that Jinnie thought were wonderful, though they were so -plain. Then she kissed Jinnie and said to her,-- - -“I once had a little girl of thy age; but a year ago she died. She even -looked like thee, my dear.” - -Jinnie was so weak that she had to lie upon the bed when the washing -and dressing were over; “and such a bed!” thought Jinnie. Thomas -Elwood’s wife brought some breakfast up to her, and Jinnie thought -that she had never tasted anything so good. She did not know that such -delicious food could be found anywhere in the world. - -Jinnie grew better and stronger in a few days, and Thomas Elwood and -his wife became so much attached to her that they resolved that they -would keep her and adopt her in the place of the child that had been -taken away from them. - -Jinnie was very happy, and she talked freely with them. She told them -about her search for Kris Kingle, and about that splendid doll she saw -in the window on the night she went to the strange baker’s. - -Although entertaining sentiments which forbade any enthusiasm for -Christmas and Kris Kingle, and dolls in gorgeous apparel, something -impelled Thomas Elwood to go to see that special doll. - -That night, as he sat with his wife in front of the grate fire in the -sitting-room, she said to him, Jinnie being in bed,-- - -“Thomas, does thee think there would be any harm in giving Virginia a -little pleasure on the 25th of this month?” - -“How does thee mean, Rachel?” - -“Well, she seems to have her little head filled with nonsense about -Kris Kingle and Christmas, and as the poor child has had a life so full -of misery, I thought, perhaps, we might--” - -“Thee doesn’t mean to keep Christmas in this house, does thee?” - -“Not exactly that, but--” - -“What would Friends say if we should do that?” - -“No; but there can be no harm in giving the poor child some playthings, -and we may as well give them upon one day as another.” - -“What kind of playthings would thee give her?” - -“Why not buy her a doll? She seemed to like that doll at Thomas Smith’s -store very much.” - -“But, Rachel, that doll was dressed in a most worldly manner. Ought we -to risk filling the child’s mind with vain and frivolous notions about -dress?” - -“She has hardly had a chance to feed her vanity in that manner thus -far.” - -“Thee would be willing, then,” said Thomas, “to buy for her that -gaily-dressed doll?” - -“I think I would; just this once.” - -“Well,” said Thomas, slowly, “I am glad to hear thee say so, because -to-day I bought that very doll.” And he produced it from a bundle that -he took from under the sofa. - -Kris Kingle came to Jinnie that Christmas eve, and in the morning her -joy as she clasped the doll in her arms was so great that she could -not express it. While she was at the breakfast table Thomas Elwood was -called to the parlor to see a visitor. Presently he summoned Jinnie, -and when Jinnie came into the room she was startled to see Mrs. Tyke. -It flashed across her mind that Mrs. Tyke had come to take her away, -and she began to cry. Thomas Elwood comforted her. Mrs. Tyke had come -to beg for mercy. She wished to escape prosecution. - -Thomas turned to Jinnie and said,-- - -“Virginia, this is the woman who has done thee so much harm. I can have -her punished if I wish. What would thee do to her if thee had thy way?” - -“I would forgive her,” said Jinnie, timidly. - -It seemed as if Jinnie had been visited also by the _real_ Kris Kingle. -Mrs. Tyke was permitted to go unpunished. - - - - -Transcriber’s Notes - - -Punctuation, hyphenation, and spelling were made consistent when a -predominant preference was found in the original book; otherwise they -were not changed. - -Simple typographical errors were corrected; unbalanced quotation marks -were remedied. - -Except for the Frontispiece, illustrations in this eBook have been -positioned next to paragraphs they reference, and page number -references in the captions have been removed, as they’re not needed. - - - - - -End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Fortunate Island and Other Stories, by -Max Adeler - -*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK FORTUNATE ISLAND, OTHER STORIES *** - -***** This file should be named 60632-0.txt or 60632-0.zip ***** -This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: - http://www.gutenberg.org/6/0/6/3/60632/ - -Produced by Tim Lindell, Charlie Howard, and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This -file was produced from images generously made available -by The Internet Archive/American Libraries.) - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will -be renamed. - -Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright -law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, -so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United -States without permission and without paying copyright -royalties. 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