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diff --git a/old/60404-0.txt b/old/60404-0.txt deleted file mode 100644 index e8c1861..0000000 --- a/old/60404-0.txt +++ /dev/null @@ -1,2039 +0,0 @@ -The Project Gutenberg EBook of The First Book of Eve, by Edward Huskinson - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most -other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions -whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of -the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at -www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have -to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook. - -Title: The First Book of Eve - -Author: Edward Huskinson - -Contributor: Richard King - -Illustrator: Anne Harriet Fish - -Release Date: October 2, 2019 [EBook #60404] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: UTF-8 - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE FIRST BOOK OF EVE *** - - - - -Produced by Richard Tonsing, ellinora, and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This -file was produced from images generously made available -by The Internet Archive/American Libraries.) - - - - - - - - - -[Illustration] - -[Illustration] - - The - Adventures - of - Eve - - - are continued weekly in - - THE TATLER - - which is by common consent - - The brightest, prettiest, most unique Weekly Paper in the world. - -[Illustration: THE UNIQUE PAPER] - -[Illustration] - - - - - The First Book of Eve. - - DRAWN BY FISH. - - WRITTEN AND DESIGNED BY FOWL. - - _Reproduced from and with the kind permission of “The Tatler.”_ - -[Illustration: E H] - -[Illustration: A H F] - - BRENTANO’S, NEW YORK. - 1916. - - - - - DEDICATED TO - THE BOYS IN KHAKI AND BLUE. - - - Dear boys, - - I am dedicating my first little book to you because you have - written and told me so often from the North Sea, from “Somewhere - in France,” from Africa, and Mesopotamia that my queer sketches - have brightened for you some dull or gloomy hours. Bless you! - for if that is true, why then I feel that even your frivolous - Eve has done her “bit” in this terrible heartrending struggle. - And you will understand, dear boys, that I have—notwithstanding - Aunt Matilda’s and Uncle Fred’s disapproval—kept gay and - frivolous to please _you_, and not because I didn’t understand - and appreciate what you were doing for me, and other little - Eves, and above all for our dear old country, which you have - saved. Bless you all again and again. That all you wish may come - to you as freely and as welcome as your generous appreciation - has come to me is the constant wish of— - - Your loving little friend, - - EVE. - - P.S.—Tou-Tou sends a fond lick. - -[Illustration] - - - - - PREFACE. - - - By Richard King. - -It is not often that an artist evolves a new type—more especially a new -comic type. But this is the proud achievement of the artist whose work -adorns this little book. “Eve” has now become a clearly recognised -figure of modern life, as clearly recognised as are the figures of -George Belcher, Dana Gibson, and Bateman, and that very small band of -clever artists who have characteristics peculiar to themselves. - -Few artists, however, have more quickly sprung into world-wide -popularity than “Eve.” How great this popularity is may be judged by the -numerous imitators which, while they copy many of Eve’s mannerisms, lose -all that humour and spirit which make of Eve’s art such a fascinating -and irresistible thing. For Eve possesses a gift which cannot be -imitated, no matter how clever the artist who imitates her may be. Each -person’s sense of humour—or lack of it—belongs to them alone. And it is -Eve’s humour which make her delightful drawings so appealing. She has -that sense of the “absurd” which is one of the rarest senses in all -black-and-white art. And yet, while her irresistible humour makes one -laugh, while her drawings fascinate us by their quaintness, she is never -so far removed from reality as to be merely a painter of the human -grotesque. Therein lies so much of her genius. She paints humanity with -the eye of one who can see the comic in everyday people and things, and -yet she never lets her feeling for the ridiculous obliterate her feeling -for Truth. It is to be regretted that the clever letters which these -drawings originally illustrated in “The Tatler” cannot be reproduced on -account of their topicality. - -But in judging these fascinating drawings merely from the point of view -of their humour and charm, one is apt to overlook the fact that -Eve—while possessing a style which is unique—is also, and at the same -time, a designer of remarkable gifts. It is, perhaps, as a designer that -she will appeal most greatly to an artist. Each of her drawings is an -exquisite example of this gift for design. Their line, their -“proportion,” as it were, and the clever use she makes of black—big -splashes of black—all help to make her drawings exquisite little -pictures—“pictures” in the popular sense—as well as wonderful examples -of technique and imagination. Another thing about all her drawings is -their feminine daintiness. Each design is as dainty as the heroine who -appears in nearly all of them. With a few strokes, a dot here and there, -a line, she can suddenly bring before our eyes a perfectly-recognisable -type. In this way her gifts are superior even to Phil May, who surely, -more than many artists, obtained his effects with the least number of -unessentials. - -Moreover, Eve never draws what I must call a “dead” figure. -Everyone—everything, almost—is alive. Her animals—burlesques of animals -though they be—are full of character and fun. Even such things as -motor-cars, ships, and carriages—which, from the point of view of an -artist painting nothing but the truth, are out of all proportion—possess -a quaintness which somehow accords better with the picture than if they -were perfect models of technical knowledge and drawing. - -Eve gives a comic twist to men and women of this world, but in that -comic “twist” we seem to see and know them better, and to know them -better is to love them more. That is one of the reasons, perhaps, why -these fascinating drawings are so popular and so adored. - -[Illustration] - - - Here beginneth— - - - - -—The Adventures of Eve - - -[Illustration: - - _Being an irresponsible record of some incidents in the career of a - frivolous little lady—to say nothing of Adam, Aunt Matilda, Uncle - Fred, and Tou-Tou._ -] - -[Illustration: - - _The successful invasion of the London stage by American artistes - induces Eve to abandon her habitual reserve and appear (for charity) - in a revue especially written for her by Sir Peter Pan. In order to - avoid shocking the susceptibilities of the “past smart set,” who are - these war times very early-Victorian, she has depicted herself at - the moment when her scarcity of costume was obliterated by the mass - of floral tributes hurled by an enraptured audience_ -] - - - - -Eve as a Policeman -and -Some War-time Cooks. - - -[Illustration: - - _Eve, Evelyn, and Evelinda rising to the occasion by forming a posse - of police. With the aid of Uncle Fred they practise the necessary - gymnastics to fit them for the force with such success that—_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _—they are able to astonish and convince a real copper as to their - suitability for action_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Servant Susie’s making shells for soldiers, so a splendid example is - set to the ordinary citizeness by the titled rich, who are busy - taking cookery lessons. It is, indeed, right that we stay-at-home - men should in our trenchers share the dangers of our active brothers - in their trenches_ -] - - - - -The Dramatic -Story of Eve’s -Career as a -Hospital Nurse. - - -[Illustration: - - _A daily paper says, “You can always tell when a girl has a young man - at the front by the regimental badge she wears.” Eve likes the idea, - and being at the moment enraptured with a Highland laddie determines - that the world shall know it_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Those people who were wont to think the tight skirt unwomanly are - hoping that the full skirt will bring back the modesty of the - Victorian era. Eve hopes so, too; here she is in the new spotted - veil cultivating a demure expression_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Eve and her sisters, Evelyn and Evelinda, tired of enforced - inactivity, decide to do their bit at the front—or near it, and are - here seen making their preparations for departure_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Here we have the wet and warm farewells on the parental doorstep. We - have sternly pointed out to Eve that her costume is not the - regulation one for the nursing sisterhood; but, as Eve says, all - that matters is to look nice and be nice_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _When Eve, Evelyn, and Evelinda arrived at their destination they were - promptly set to work scrubbing the floors and washing the dishes, - while less ornamental but considerably more useful workers attended - to the dear soldiers. Eve, Evelyn, and Evelinda, if disappointed, - were full of patriotism, so they worked—and worked_— -] - -[Illustration: - - _Till the authorities, in pure compassion, assisted our tired little - friends back home_— -] - -[Illustration: - - _Where, with the blissful consciousness of duty done, may still be - found wrapped in dreamless slumber Eve, Evelyn, and Evelinda_ -] - - - - -Eve Stays on the -East Coast with -Uncle Fred— - - -[Illustration: - - _Eve goes down to the east coast for a rest cure. The first night she - heard a bang and woke with a start and a cry of “Oh, dear! Oh, - dear!”_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Uncle Fred, her kind and genial host, also awoke with a start and a - cry of “—— ——” (censored). “It’s those —— Zeppelins,” he said_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _It was Zeppelins, and Eve and uncle came down three flights of stairs - like shells from a gun, while, as for poisonous gas—well, you should - have heard Uncle Fred!_ -] - -[Illustration: - - —_I repeat, you should have heard Uncle Fred when he landed with Eve - on the top of him. It was the finest hymn of hate ever heard on the - east coast_ -] - - - - -—And Enjoys her First -Experience of the Zeps. - - -[Illustration: - - _Anyway, here are Eve and uncle entrenched under the dining-room - table. Eve is saying, “Are your teeth chattering, dear?” which is - annoying uncle, for, as Eve well knows, they are up in the glass on - his dressing-table_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Soon the Zeppelins passed away, and uncle, who had suffered severely - down the stairs, made a slow but comfortable recovery_ -] - -[Illustration: - - —_And is now having the time of his life in London, where admiring - crowds of both sexes take him for a wounded hero straight from the - front. Uncle Fred is himself beginning to believe he has been there_ -] - - - - -Eve Buys -a Motor -Car. - -[Illustration] - -[Illustration] - - -[Illustration: - - _Eve, deciding that pedestrianism in these days of lady-driven cars is - too dangerous and exciting a pursuit, determines to get a runabout - of her own. Regard her then endeavouring to fascinate one of the - typical little nuts which in those days adorned a fashionable - garage_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _The car being chosen and the preliminary instructions having been - obtained, Eve, full of pride and rapture, bids farewell to her - little friend and sets forth to astound and arouse the envy of her - dearest friends in the park_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Astound them she certainly did—not the less because of the regularity - with which she mistakenly pressed down the accelerator instead of - the brake. Here we see her during one of the forward leaps - consequent on the error_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _No mechanism, any more than any man, was ever built to resist Eve’s - unexpected little ways, with the result that she, although assured - as to the astonishment of her friends, is less certain as to the - envy she aroused. (In case of any misunderstanding, we may add that - the picture is supposed to represent Eve trying to repair her car in - the most crowded and fashionable spot in the park)_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _However, all troubles come eventually to an end, and Adam, poor dear, - just back from the trenches, learns at last what real fear means. - The fat rolling lines at the bottom of the picture are supposed to - represent the dust which kindly Nature raised to hide the casualties - in Eve’s wake, but in reality they were put in to hide Eve’s - weakness in drawing car wheels_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _The shortage in postmen grows apace. Eve, as ever, steps into the - breach, and you can imagine the unadulterated joy of one of her - admirers who, unshorn and untidy, opens the door of his flat to - receive from her a pink and scented missive_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _She signalises Italy’s splendid entry into the field of hostilities - on the side of the Allies by adopting the famous Bersaglieri - headgear_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _War economy proceeds apace, and Eve shows us that since brandy balls - and “sich like” have taken the place of the tiny liqueur, society, - straining after simplicity and innocence, has adopted a popular game - reminiscent of our childhood. Adam, lucky man, drops the sweet, - which the expectant fair catch in their tiny mouths_ -] - - - - -Just a Few Odds and Ends. - -[Illustration: - - _Study of Eve pondering deeply as to how she can help, these critical - times. (We don’t wear sleeves on our nighties nowadays—for economy’s - sake)_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _The merit of the poor “special” who guards gasworks and bridges is, - in Eve’s opinion, sadly overlooked. A few little charming al fresco - suppers to a few special “specials” is a duty she delights in_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Eves are not only driving ’buses, but also conducting them these war - times. Our picture represents the old brigade of ’bus riders - helplessly imploring our heroine to stop and pick them up. Eve, - however, having landed a few khaki heroes, is forsaking the regular - route to take them for a little joy-ride to Richmond Park_ -] - - - - -The Zeps -Threaten -Again. - - -[Illustration: - - _Alas! the Coaching Clubs’ fascinating meets are a thing of the past_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Eve draws up a list of things to do if the Zeps do come. She is seen - reading it to Tou-Tou, who is visibly impressed_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _She carefully packs her hamper every night in case she may have to - pic-nic out among the débris of her home the next day. Tou-Tou, as - you see, is wearing his respirator_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Here we have a vivid picture of Eve, hamper packed and ready (Tou-Tou - on guard), keeping one eye open for the alarm. A considerable - clamour awakens her, so_— -] - -[Illustration: - - —_she arises fixes her respirator, and prepares to descend to the - darkness of the cellars_— -] - -[Illustration: - - —_only to find the disturbance was caused by a cordon of those gallant - fellows, the “Extry-Spechuls,” who are visibly determined to guard - her from all possible calamity_ -] - - - - -Eve Mobilises -her Sisters. - - -[Illustration: - - _Patriotic women are energetically undertaking the work of Adams - engaged in military duties. Eve desires to form a corps to - supplement “the Methusiliers” or “the Last Gaspers” in case of - invasion. Here is Eve being sworn in—a new experience, though, - thanks to Uncle Fred, she is used to being sworn at_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _This is not the frivolous picture it appears, but represents little - Eves in training for E.C.D.C. (Eve’s Coastal Defence Corps). Of - course, the first thing to do is to learn to swim. Eve cannot tell - us where this is taking place, as it would give away the (amatory) - disposition of the Grand Fleet, which anchored dangerously close in - soon after operations commenced_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _They found firing practice a little trying and dangerous, although - the method of holding the rifle as demonstrated by our artist - certainly mitigates the unpleasantness of the kick back_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _The cavalry section also had their difficulties_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _But the grand finale of the procession of the various units of the - corps through London was an immediate success. The immense concourse - of young men which followed in its wake were all inveigled into the - recruiting office, a result which of course justified to the full - the existence of the corps_ -] - - - - -Eve’s Adventure -with the Gallant -Submarine. - - -[Illustration: - - _Eve, overcome by her war energies in London, returns to the east - coast, where we find her enjoying a peaceful dip far, as one would - think, from war’s alarms. But_— -] - -[Illustration: - - —_suddenly she sees one of England’s gallant submarines appearing to - investigate her presence. Her intense interest in its approach - blinds her to the fact of an inimical gas-bag approaching with the - evident intention of making the important capture of our little - friend with the grappling iron_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _This is just Tou-Tou in Imperial mood_ (_it has nothing to do with - the submarine story, but fills an awkward blank_.—EVE) -] - -[Illustration: - - _The bold and wicked air-pirates grappled Eve as planned, but (hooray - for the Navy!) the gallant officer on the conning tower was able to - seize her shapely limbs as she drifted over him, and, with the help - of his equally gallant crew, effected a rescue at the expense of - Eve’s already diminutive bathing creation_— -] - -[Illustration: - - —_and, warm and happy, Eve is conveyed back to land at the slowest - possible speed_ -] - - - - -Eve Goes -into the City -and Relieves -a Man for -Active -Service. - - -[Illustration: - - _Eve, patriotically wishful to release an able-bodied Adam for active - service, applies for and obtains a situation as clerk in the office - of a susceptible merchant_— -] - -[Illustration: - - —_who in due course introduces her to his staff, who are no less - pleasantly affected by our charming little friend than their stern - and businesslike employer_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _The constant flow of Eve’s khaki-clad friends, perennially anxious as - to her progress, causes the first rift in the lute between her - employer and herself_— -] - -[Illustration: - - —_which is distinctly widened by the monopoly she gradually obtains - over the telephone for social purposes_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Finally, every clerk being prostrate with heart weakness, and the - clerical work in the office at a standstill, Eve’s business career - is cut short by her unappreciative master. By a careless swing of - the purse Eve is endeavouring to show you her extreme nonchalance in - a difficult situation_ -] - - - - -Eve has -Trouble with -her Bills—but -Triumphs. - - -[Illustration: - - _Eve has spent many sleepless nights brooding over her accumulated - bills. You see, at the beginning of war time you will remember she - developed—with ease and rapidity—an activity of shopping under the - discredited banner of “Business as Usual”_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _The chill ferocity with which Adam received her “little” accounts has - filled her with fear and trepidation. Her very independence was - threatened_— -] - -[Illustration: - - —_when an idea struck her— —and every morning she did her - exercises with a fervid gusto_— -] - -[Illustration: - - —_and by regular attendance at one of the fashionable gymnasiums, - attained a surprising degree of activity and strength_— -] - -[Illustration: - - —_The next time Adam gets the bills and commences his “hymn of hate”_— -] - -[Illustration: - - —_she ups and biffs him one in the eye, with surprisingly successful - results. What is left of Adam may be seen in the picture on the - right. He is now longing for conscription_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Do not misunderstand this picture_— -] - -[Illustration: - - —_for as you see, it is only a lesson in botany_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Even Eve’s desperate attempts to simulate a gaiety which she does not - feel do not blind one entirely to the tragedy of the Adamless - condition of our bathing beaches_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _At certain fashionable resorts on the east coast Eve and Adam - discover the rapturous solitude they seek for, which they find - absolutely denied them_— — — -] - -[Illustration: - - —_in erstwhile rural paradises, owing to the activities of the new - armies and the last gaspers_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _A tragic and dramatic picture, showing Eve overcome with the sudden - and true realisation of “where duty calls”_ -] - - - - -Eve Outwits -Artful -Adam. - - -[Illustration: - - _Eve receives a telephone message from Adam to say that he will be - kept late at the office. Since Eve started her new economical - cooking she has received similar messages about twice a week. So, - telling the cook to keep Adam’s dinner warm for him_— -] - -[Illustration: - - —_she effects a further economy by going out to dinner with a pal_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Imagine Eve’s astonishment to see, when she arrives at the - restaurant, Adam wallowing in a scrumptious dinner with some of his - men friends. Eve sees but manages not to be seen, and at an early - hour she slips away and rushes home, where she awaits the elusive - Adam_— -] - -[Illustration: - - —_whom she greets with tender solicitude, and insists on his sitting - right down and devouring all that nice macaroni that cook has kept - hot for him. Serve him right, the brute!_ -] - - - - -Eve Improves upon the -Very Incomplete Interning -Arrangements of the -Government. - - -[Illustration: - - _Eve, being of opinion that the interning question is not carried - nearly far enough, decides to complete the operation by removing a - lot of people who are better away. Here we have her robed and ready - to hold her court of inquiry_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Uncle Fred is the first victim. He has been insufferable since he - fell down the cellar steps avoiding the Zeppelins, and made his - bandaged and unjustifiably heroic reappearance since the accident_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Next to be sent into an unhonoured obscurity are, reading from left - to right—(1) The lady who advocates the equality of the sexes, with - a suppressed predisposition towards emotional freedom; (2) The - curate who has heard an early cuckoo and looses the news on a - receptive press; (3) The lady with an insatiable desire to - communicate with a “lonely soldier”; (4) The little boy who will - recite; (5) The poetess whose spring ebullitions fill the corners of - the papers; (6) The little girl scout who desires to blend - patriotism with publicity—on her knitting activities_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Next come, or rather go, those senile saunterers or withered nuts who - turn round for a leering examination of the little Eves who pass - them on their doddering promenades_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _The young man who has Cook-toured the Dardanelles in the past, and - who on the strength of it insists on explaining at great length the - operations there, is sentenced to be sent back at once, to be used - as a sand bag or a buzzer_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _And last but not least, the gentlemen who invented the wide skirt are - sentenced to be smothered in their own creations. We regret that - Eve’s feelings should, after administering justice, have induced her - to administer a most unjudicial poke with her parasol in the rear - flank of the destroyer of her peace. Tou-Tou is also seen advancing - to the attack_ -] - - - - -And Now -a Little -Racing. - - -[Illustration: - - _Eve, momentarily weary of well-doing, goes for a holiday and a day’s - racing_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _On every hand, with that air of mystery so necessary to all real - racing “heads,” her admirers urge her to back Mr. Jolly Soel’s - horse, which she is proceeding to do. When—_ -] - -[Illustration: - - —_she catches sight of a jockey whose looks attract her, and whose - colours satisfy her artistic sense. Naturally she puts “her shirt” - (as Adam so vulgarly expressed it) on his mount_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Her attendant Adams scoff at her foolishness, and Eve has many - anxious moments as the race proceeds_— -] - -[Illustration: - - —_but, of course, Eve’s charger rolls home first, and her feelings - overcome her to such an extent that she embraces the attractive - jockey in the open. (We regret that the horse, which is on the left - of the picture, has only two legs. Eve refuses to draw any more for - the money)_ -] - - - - -Eve Becomes -a Policewoman. - - -[Illustration: - - _With the idea of releasing an able-bodied “bobby” for action, Eve - determines to join the women’s police, and is seen preparing herself - for her day’s beauty—or rather duty_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _She found there was no difficulty in stopping the male traffic, - although jealous and inefficient females evinced a desire to “pass - along”—with their snub-noses in the air. Everything was going - beautifully until_— -] - -[Illustration: - - —_a gust of wind seriously disturbed the equanimity of our little - policewoman in the manner above pictorially described. It ended in - stopping the traffic for miles round_— -] - -[Illustration: - - —_as, of course, her damaged coiffure had to be rearranged, amid - sarcastic comments from the females “afore mentioned”_— -] - -[Illustration: - - —_which for once thoroughly upset our tired little heroine, who was - herself “taken up” dead beat and conveyed home by gallant members of - the sister services_ -] - - - - -Uncle Fred -is Again -Victimised. - - -[Illustration: - - _Eve has a magnificent idea for helping on the war. Meeting Uncle Fred - in the park, she wheedles him into escorting her into the Saveloy - Hotel—_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _—where she is overcome with a sudden faintness, which disappears as - soon as the perturbed uncle has given her a liqueur brandy. With - commendable patriotism she has him arrested on the spot for - treating, and_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _—the result is a considerable contribution to the funds available for - the prosecution of the war_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Eve would very much like to know why one meets such numbers of young - soldiers in the “frillies” department at the various stores. To meet - one’s fiancé in the midst of trousseau preparations is, to say the - least of it, awkward_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _The fact that the air raid on London, if coming, cannot be much - longer postponed, combined with the warm and darkening summer - evenings, has rendered the game of Zep-watching more popular than - ever. Many gallant soldiers are daily “bombed” into matrimony in - consequence_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _This is a battle picture, and shows a massed attack by Eves and - attendant Tou-Tous on Mr. Justice “Blank,” who dared to criticise - the race of Pekingese in court during a recent case_ -] - - - - -Eve Works -and Plays. - - -[Illustration: - - _Reminiscences of gay, glad years that are past flicker through Eve’s - frivolous mind. She remembers the picturesqueness which ever graced - the appearance of Eve, Evelyn, and Evelinda—_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _—contrasted with the stern utility of the costumes she now wears. - However, as Eve says, contrast is the salt of life and—_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _—after a day’s hard nursing—_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _—or filing of war-baby records—_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _—or collecting tickets—_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _—she finds that she enjoys a little amusement in the evenings more - than ever she did_ -] - - - - -Eve and -her Lonely -Soldier. - - -[Illustration: - - _Eve—in her loneliness—has adopted a lonely soldier, and writes - faithfully to him every evening_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Wishing to make life pleasanter for him she orders for him many - articles of male attire and other comforting trifles_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Eve, finding that the testing of cigars for the lonely one is a - somewhat unpleasant business, causes a certain amount of friction - with Adam by sending him the ones she knows that Adam keeps for - himself and his particular friends_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _When the lonely soldier comes home Eve goes forth to meet him in her - very best with his photograph dangling gracefully round her neck for - identification purposes_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _At the station (it is a station) Eve meets her lonely friend, but - finds to her astonishment, when she warmly greets him, he does not - return it with any enthusiasm. Turning round she sees to her - horror—not unmixed with fear—that his wife, whom she hadn’t heard - anything about, has also arrived on the scene_ -] - - - - -Eve -Goes -into the -Beauty -Business. - - -[Illustration: - - _Eve, Evelyn, and Evelinda find they simply must do something to pay - for the rise in hats consequent on these horrid war taxes—_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _—so, with a view to keeping some of the new officers up to old form, - they start a beauty barber’s shop for the blue and khaki—_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _—which is an immense success from the day of opening. Isn’t Adam on - the right getting a dinky frothing?_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Manicuring is simply a screaming success. Two operators are - compulsory. For Eve cannot trust Evelyn or Evelinda, and neither of - them can trust Eve alone in the dim recesses of that department_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _But success brings as usual trials in its train, and now Aunt Martha - insists on having her hair curled there daily—_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _—while Uncle Fred is a very glutton for having his hair cut_ -] - - - - -Christmas at Home -and -Amusing. - - -[Illustration: - - (1) _Eve goes down to Aunt Matilda for Christmas. Her first care is to - hang up a bunch of mistletoe in a prominent position—_ -] - -[Illustration: - - (2)_—which she steadfastly stands under. Alas! naughty old men and - schoolboys are the only representatives of the male species present - to take advantage of it_ -] - -[Illustration: - - (3) _The Christmas dinner is still more depressing—no Adams, no - excitement. (Note the size of the war plum pudding and the character - of the drinks)_ -] - -[Illustration: - - (4) _So Eve says she has had a wire and the next day bids farewell to - a stern and incredulous aunt_ -] - -[Illustration: - - (5) _Back in town again, and the dear boys ring up and insist on Eve - coming to the Savoy for Boxing Day dinner_ -] - -[Illustration: - - (6) _Here are the dear boys in khaki and blue telephoning. The names, - from right to left, are (censored by Eve)_ -] - -[Illustration: - - (7) _And finally here is our little friend, her spirits regained and - surrounded by her gallant friends in khaki and blue, to whom, on - behalf of herself and all her dear friend readers, she is wishing - God-speed, good luck, and a happy and victorious return_ -] - - - - -Eve and the -New Furs. - - -[Illustration: - - _Eve is a great admirer of the new voluminous high-collared fur cloak, - but finds it impossible to see—much less appreciate—the dinky - tassels on her new boots_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _She also finds her friends have the greatest difficulty in - recognising her, and that Tou-Tou is continually getting lost_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Furthermore, these high collars make it necessary for Jack and Tommy - to feed her when she goes to tea with them at the Savoy. (Doesn’t it - make a pathetic and appealing picture?)_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _One advantage, however, is that when Johnny Slacker, Mr. Bore, or - anyone horrid heaves in sight she can retire without danger of - recognition_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Eve adores the ferocious masks which adorned the muffs of the truly - fashionable last winter. But the above tragic incident, which shows - a convalescent V.C. fainting in sheer terror at the sudden - appearance of our heroine—and muff—has considerably shaken her - pleasure in her hand warmer_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Eve is “simply mad” over the way Gertie Millar does her hair in the - Gollywog song at the Palace Theatre. She tried it, went to the - theatre, and found herself the centre of interest from all sides and - abuse from the back_ -] - - - - -Some Why’s -and -Wherefores. - - -[Illustration: - - _The tax on tea and sugar has reduced our poor Eve and Tou-Tou to hot - water instead of the refreshing cup of tea which formerly cheered - Eve’s early-morning awakening._ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Why it is that when Adam has got his oldest clothes on, and has - neglected to shave the bristles from his clear-cut chin, he always - meets his most adorable acquaintances—Miss Wild-Duck, Miss Flirt, - and Mrs. Darling—_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _—Whereas, when he goes out to dine, très bien soigné in his brand-new - uniform—red tabs an’ all—this is the sort of party that greets his - wrathful gaze? (At the particular moment the picture was taken Aunt - Matilda’s second revoke was passing unnoticed in the pleasant hum of - conversation)_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Why, also, that on the rare occasions when Eve’s oft-quoted but - distant cousin, the Countess of Crimp, takes her out for a drive, - the streets are empty of envious friends or impressed tradesmen—_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _—And that the dear Duchess of Bohemia insists on spending the whole - of their mutual time in the obscurity of a “movie” theatre—_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _—Whereas when Cousin Tom from the country, with absolute sartorial - indifference to the conventions of London, induces her to drive out - in his second-hand Ford, Eve meets and sees everyone she has been - trying to impress favourably for seasons past?_ -] - - - - -A -Matrimonial -Puzzle— - -—and Eve -as a -Chaperone. - - -[Illustration: - - _This is Eve congratulating her two dear friends—Miss Verry-Pretty and - Miss Plain—on their engagements. She is expressing the usual frantic - anxiety to meet the happy fiancés_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _She meets them, and wonders again for the nth time why it is that the - pretty girls are nearly always captured by the—well—ordinary-looking - men, while those less favoured by Nature so often bag veritable - Adonises_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Eve, burdened with the responsibilities of her unmarried sisters, - Evelyn and Evelinda, is always endeavouring to get them suitably - paired. She finds it very annoying that when she takes them out to - dine with her very highly respectable cousin, the Countess of Crimp, - they meet so many people like Mr. Snob, Captain Auction-Bridge, and - Mr. Toady_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Whereas when she has tucked her little charges safely away in bed and - flies out for a little relaxation to a naughty night club—_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _—She meets Lord Knut, Reggie Hardcash, and all those very gilded and - eligible young men who would lead Evelyn and Evelinda to the altar - in so suitable—and golden—a fashion_ -] - - - - -—And Yet -More -Why’s. - - -[Illustration: - - _Adam insists on Eve being revaccinated. Eve retorts that it can’t be - done while the fashions prevent you having any sleeves in your - evening dresses. Adam replies, “Have it done on the leg, then!” But - Eve, more in sorrow than in anger, is saying, “How can I show my - legs to a doctor man!”_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Why is it so many people’s telephones are in the hall or some equally - public place? This is what Eve feels like when Captain Perfect - Spooner rings her up at a friend’s house_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Why is it when most married men are simply dying to be “called” - anywhere—_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _—A short-sighted Government has called up all the single men who are - so badly needed at home and enjoy life so unmistakably?_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _This is how trench life appeals to them respectively. The married men - are on the right. (We must explain that the bachelor warriors on the - left are not petrified with terror, but only agitated in thinking of - the dear girls they left behind)_ -] - - - - -Eve at a -Dinner Party— - - -[Illustration: - - _This is one of Eve’s great moments in the day—namely, arriving last - at a big dinner party. She knows full well the effect of this tardy - coming—this bursting upon a collection of delighted if hungry men - and curious and envious women—instead of trickling in with the - others at the proper time_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _But the above manœuvre is a very catching habit, and each little Eve, - anxious not to be the first to arrive, delays the hour of dining. - Here we see a vivid picture of a hostess and her male guests sharing - the knowledge that the soup is cold and the dinner going to blazes_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Eve has suffered overmuch lately from Aunt Matilda and Major Bore, so - in a spirit of devilish revenge she brings them together in a little - party à trois and tells each of them that the other is very deaf. - The consequence was that they screamed away at each other until - their tiresome voices were stilled for an appreciable period_ -] - - - - -—and With Our -Gallant Airmen. - - -[Illustration: - - _Eve receives an invitation from a unit of that most attractive and - gallant body of men, the Royal Flying Corps. She is intensely - excited and rushes off to see them_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _She finds that the “feeling” between woman and woman is nothing - compared with that existing between members of the two sections of - flying men. In the picture the gallant observer is saying, “What! - Lunching with a beastly pilot? We always look upon ’em as mere - chauffeurs, Eve, dear”—_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _—Whereas, the intrepid pilot at luncheon remarked, “I shouldn’t get - too thick with those observer fellers, Eve; we only regard ’em as - bally luggage.” (Eve had to put the wings on the wrong side of the - chest to show them)_ -] - - - - -Eve Goes -on to a -Farm— - - -[Illustration: - - _Eve, tired of the tension of war anxiety in town, determines to join - the army of farmworkers. She and Adam therefore journey to Mudshire - and offer their services to Farmer Giles. He suggests that they - should commence by looking after the lambs, which pleased Eve - immensely, as it meant a journey to town to procure a ducky little - Watteau shepherdess gown. The lambs were hardly less affected than - Farmer Giles._ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Eve’s artistic sense is deeply offended by the bizarre, not to say - early-Victorian, markings of the cows; however, a judicious - application of paints transformed them into ornamental as well as - useful members of the community. Farmer Giles’s hair is, you will - observe, rising in horror and pushing his hat of his head. (Eve - can’t draw cows’ legs; hasn’t she got out of it cleverly?)_ -] - - - - -—To Help the Labour-denuded -Farmer. - - -[Illustration: - - _After experimenting in pretty but amorous poultry Eve is here seen - ruthlessly banishing them from her rural Paradise; for, as she truly - says, “they set such a bad example to the servants”_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Adam decided to attend to the little ducks. He does so, and Eve - prudently decides to—_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _—Abandon Farmer Giles at once, and she returns with a chastened and - apologetic Adam to London. The animals in the picture are those - which Eve made pets of at the farm, and which she simply couldn’t - bear to part with. So she is taking the poor darlings with her_ -] - - - - -Eve -Appears -in -“Tina”— - - -[Illustration: - - _Eve, like Byron, wakes up one morning to find herself famous, as the - Adelphi Theatre has made a screaming success over an “Eve” number. - Here she is, with an equally excited and palpitating Tou-Tou, - dashing to the theatre to book seats_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _This is the ’orrible press outside the box office, which is besieged - by khaki and blue—who do the most of the pressin’—Miss Wild-Duck, - Miss Darling, and all the little Eves who appeared in the spring - like the snowdrops_ -] - - - - -—At the Adelphi Theatre. - - -[Illustration: - - _Here is dear Phyllis Dare singing the song, also Tou-Tou, who made - straight for the stage when the play commenced, and some gallant - heroes, who see their old but elusive friend materialised at last_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _All this theatrical publicity has caused Eve’s head to swell right - out of her collar. In the first glow of fame she feels she can treat - Aunt Matilda, Miss Gush, and the Bore brothers with the indifference - she has so long suppressed_ -] - - - - -The Death -of Tou-Tou. - - -[Illustration: - - _Now this is the terrible tragedy of Tou-Tou—Eve discovereth him - imbibing of strong liquors—and in war time too_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _So she took the delinquent to hear Sir Edward Clarke’s grave lecture - wherein he urged the clergy to set an example to the country by - giving up all intoxicants. Tou-Tou’s disgust is evident. Owing to - lack of space we have only room to show Sir Edward’s impressive - legs_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Overcome by Sir Edward’s eloquence, Eve takes Tou-Tou to the police - station to sign the pledge_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _Tou-Tou, accustomed to sly sips of port, stands the monotony of life - for some time, but suddenly breaks out and enters on a career of - “frightfulness,” which, as is seen in the picture, thoroughly upsets - his mistress. The sad result of this outburst is seen in the - right-hand corner of our page._ -] - -[Illustration: - - _A number of tiny dances were given this springtime for the sake of - the dear boys on leave. Hundreds of years ago, before the war, Eve - used to get her dance invitations in this way on formal and - ceremonial cards. But nowadays they are conveyed in much happier - fashion; for instance—_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _—Reggie (on leave): “Hello! Hello, Eve! Just back, old girl, and a - few of us want to strafe some bubbly tonight, so we’ve borrowed a - house, and we’re givin’ a hop. Roll up with a few ‘cheeries,’ and - bring a bottle with you in case the supply dries up”_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _The classical picture on the left represents the pre-war Adam taking - a demure Eve away from her watchdog for a graceful waltz. On the - right you see the modern, cheerful, and unchaperoned conditions. - (The Adams and Reggies don’t really dance in uniforms and spurs, but - Eve likes drawing them like that)_ -] - - - - -War-time -Dances. - - -[Illustration: - - _The arrival at “the ball” in the old days. Haughty wall-propping men, - and little Eves wondering whether they were going to get off and - detach one of the aforesaid males from his customary support, or - also decorate the side benches—_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _—But nowadays at “the party” each little Eve takes her own young - man—sometimes two—with whom she spends the greater part of a - delightful evening, so she’s happy, he’s happy, and chaperones, - safely ensconced in bed or at the bridge table, are happy too—_ -] - -[Illustration: - - _—While the final breakfast-supper, when a raid is made on the kitchen - to see what can be found, and Reggie or Billy makes the most divine - omelettes in the fish saucepan, provides a worthy finish to a - delightful evening, which keeps many a festive on-leaver out of - mischief_ -] - - - - -Au Revoir. - - -[Illustration] - - _Printed by Eyre & Spottiswoode, Ltd., His Majesty’s Printers, East - Harding Street, London._ - - - - -[Illustration] - -[Illustration] - - _All “Eves” should buy “The Tatler,”_ - -and then send it out to their Adam, whether he be in the North Sea or -the Trenches. - - THE TATLER - -is merry, jolly, and pretty—and heaven knows “the boys” get little -enough of that side of life while doing their grim duty. - -[Illustration: THE UNIQUE PAPER] - - =6=^{d.} - - =6=^{d.} - ------------------------------------------------------------------------- - - - - - TRANSCRIBER’S NOTES - - - 1. Silently corrected typographical errors and variations in spelling. - 2. Retained anachronistic, non-standard, and uncertain spellings as - printed. - 3. The original did not have full stops at the end of the captions. - This was not corrected. - 4. 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