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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..d7b82bc --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,4 @@ +*.txt text eol=lf +*.htm text eol=lf +*.html text eol=lf +*.md text eol=lf diff --git a/LICENSE.txt b/LICENSE.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6312041 --- /dev/null +++ b/LICENSE.txt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +This eBook, including all associated images, markup, improvements, +metadata, and any other content or labor, has been confirmed to be +in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES. + +Procedures for determining public domain status are described in +the "Copyright How-To" at https://www.gutenberg.org. + +No investigation has been made concerning possible copyrights in +jurisdictions other than the United States. Anyone seeking to utilize +this eBook outside of the United States should confirm copyright +status under the laws that apply to them. diff --git a/README.md b/README.md new file mode 100644 index 0000000..062c5bb --- /dev/null +++ b/README.md @@ -0,0 +1,2 @@ +Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for +eBook #60395 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/60395) diff --git a/old/60395-0.txt b/old/60395-0.txt deleted file mode 100644 index 128992d..0000000 --- a/old/60395-0.txt +++ /dev/null @@ -1,1516 +0,0 @@ -The Project Gutenberg EBook of Going West, by Basil King - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most -other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions -whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of -the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at -www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have -to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook. - -Title: Going West - -Author: Basil King - -Release Date: September 30, 2019 [EBook #60395] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: UTF-8 - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK GOING WEST *** - - - - -Produced by Al Haines & the online Distributed Proofreaders -Canada team at http://www.pgdpcanada.net - - - - - - - - - - - Books by - - BASIL KING - - GOING WEST - THE CITY OF COMRADES - ABRAHAM'S BOSOM - THE LIFTED VEIL - THE SIDE OF THE ANGELS - THE LETTER OF THE CONTRACT - THE WAY HOME - THE WILD OLIVE - THE INNER SHRINE - THE STREET CALLED STRAIGHT - LET NO MAN PUT ASUNDER - IN THE GARDEN OF CHARITY - THE STEPS OF HONOR - THE HIGH HEART - - HARPER & BROTHERS, NEW YORK - Established 1817 - - - - -[Frontispiece] - - - - - GOING WEST - - By - - Basil King - - _Author of - "The City of Comrades" "Abraham's Bosom" etc._ - - - - HARPER & BROTHERS PUBLISHERS - NEW YORK AND LONDON - - - - - Going West - - Copyright, 1919, by Harper & Brothers - Printed in the United States of America - Published June, 1919 - - - - -GOING WEST - - - - -GOING WEST - - -CHAPTER I - -He was not a born fighter, in spite of a big, husky frame through which -the urge of physical life was strong. On the contrary, he was a -civilian and a business man in every nerve of his body. Eight -generations on American soil had bred a type essentially industrious, -notwithstanding all the fighting in which the family had been engaged. -His father had fought in the Spanish-American War; his grandfather in -the Civil War; his great-great-grandfather in the Revolution; farther -back, his ancestors in the Connecticut Valley had beaten off the French -and Indians for nearly a hundred years. - -All that, however, had been alien to the main purposes of life. It had -been incidental, not professional. Its chief influence on Lester lay in -the assumption that, men being called for on the borders of Texas and -in Mexico, he had no choice but to go. True, he was just beginning, -after certain wayward years, to see success as a broker ahead of him; -and within the month he had become engaged to Molly Dove. But these -considerations could not weigh against the appeal of country, nor annul -those traditions of duty that had come to him from the past. - -So in the course of time, and with the march of events, he found -himself in the enemy trenches, facing a burly blue-eyed Teuton holding -a rifle by the barrel and swinging the butt about his head, while he -himself held a bayonet in his hand. Amid the wreckage, the carnage, the -tumult, he was desperately trying to recall his instructions as to how -to stick the weapon in. - -Before telling what happened then, let us go back and follow rapidly -the stages by which Lester found himself in a situation which two or -three years earlier he would have laughed out of the list of -possibilities. - -The son of a well-to-do bookseller in a great Atlantic city, he was an -instance of that reaction against the paternal bent with which we are -all familiar. His father was a gentle, scholarly man who loved books as -books. The Spanish-American campaign had left him with one leg slightly -shorter than the other, and the air of a retired general. All his -longings had once focused themselves into the hope that his son would -enter into, and one day inherit, a business built up on years of -diligence and judgment--only to be disappointed. - -Lester had no interest in books. He was not only an open-air fellow -with a zest for sports, but he had all the inclinations of a genial, -jovial soul. Taking wine, women, and song as kindred joys, he chose -brokerage as the profession that would give him closest touch with the -merry give and take of life. - -As a broker he could steal all the time he needed to "root" at games, -after he had ceased to play them actively, while the same career -rendered him more free to marry a girl like Molly Dove, a waitress in -the cafĂ© where he generally lunched, to whom his family bitterly -objected. - -His mother was a small, square-shouldered woman, with a smile so bright -that it was difficult for the most penetrating eye to see behind it. -Lester had inherited her dark color, her beetling brows, and her -vigorous physique. A gay audacity, as real as it looked, was also not -the least among the legacies she passed on to her son. - -Of his two sisters, Cora resembled the father and Ethelind the mother. -Ethelind, too, had that gay audacity, the most patent result of which -was to involve her in conflicting love-affairs. A wild-eyed thing, she -was formed on that permanent-seventeen model that came in with the -second decade of the twentieth century and induced all women, whatever -their time of life, to dress as school-girls. Cora, tall, dignified, -reserved, was the graduate of a woman's college, in which it was her -ambition one day to hold a professorship. To sisters as well as parents -the stalwart, wilful boy would have been the king among young men had -it not been for his entanglement with Molly Dove. They could pardon his -"wildness," knowing that it would pass, but they found it hard to -forgive his choice of a wife in a sphere so much below him. In fact, -they did not pardon it at all. In spite of his announcement that the -engagement had become definite, no one responded to his invitation to -make the acquaintance of the girl. - -In the matter of his "wildness" there were already stirrings of a -change of heart, though they hardly rose to the level of active -consciousness. Such reforms as he made were avowedly in deference to -Molly Dove. In cutting out--the term was his--women, wine, and song, he -made it clear to himself that he did it, not in obedience to a moral -law, but because "Molly asked him to." Molly held the odd conviction -that such indulgences were wrong, chiefly because they came in between -him and a great mystery, of which he had heard vaguely all his life, -but from which instinctively he turned his mind away. - -"There's really no mystery at all," she asserted, in that pretty way of -hers which he found at once tranquil and enthusiastic, "no more than -there's a mystery about the sun. When we fill the atmosphere with smoke -we can't see it; but that doesn't keep the sun from being there. Blow -the smoke away, and you find the sunshine as bright as ever." - -He liked to hear her talk in that way, though he was not won by her -beliefs. Far in the future he saw days when he would have shot the bolt -of his temptations and settled down with her into being the "good -fellow" she hoped to make of him. In the mean time-- - -But in the mean time came the call. It was the kind of call against -which his instincts and his interests both rebelled, but he took it -with no more analysis than he gave to the necessity of getting out of -bed on a winter's morning. There was no help for it; it was all in the -day's work. - -His family took it in the same way. It was as much a matter of course -as when Ebenezer Lester shouldered his eighteenth-century musket to -defend the stockade against the Iroquois stealing down from Canada. It -was as much a matter of course as when Charles E. Lester, the -bookseller, rallied to President McKinley against Spain. - -It was also a matter of course to Molly Dove. It would postpone the -wedding for which she had begun her simple preparations, but she had a -curious, secret facility for renouncing her own will. Her -right-about-face was made with smiling lips and glistening eyes, and no -effort that any one could see. To Lester she whispered: - -"It's going to be all right, dear. Whatever the clash of human wills, -there's only one real Ruler in the universe. The closer we can keep in -touch with Him the nearer we shall be to the usefulness and happiness -which make up what we call our destiny." - -"That's all very well." He smiled, patting her hand. "But suppose I'm -shot--or die of a fever?" - -Her reply would have staggered him if he had not put it down to the -sweet and charming eccentricity which made her different from other -girls. - -"Well, suppose it does happen that in the course of doing your duty -this mortal should 'put on immortality'--that's the way the Bible -expresses it, you know--wouldn't that be a gain for you? And what's a -gain for you couldn't be a loss for us." - -He laughed with a great guffaw. "But perhaps we shouldn't be married." - -"No; but marriage, after all, is only for time, whereas you and I are -bound by all sorts of ties which really belong to eternity." - -He took no stock in that, he told her; but he liked her gleaming -earnestness in saying it. The aunt who had brought her up must have -been a quaint, religious character, he said, to have filled her head -with such other-worldly notions. Anyhow, they were different from the -anxiety and fear which the family hid behind their stoic calmness, and -of which he felt the twinges within himself as he wound up his affairs. - - - - -CHAPTER II - -It was at the time when the possibility of a war with Mexico--or any -war at all--struck the imagination of the country as a calamity too -horrible to contemplate. There was no question as to the victory, but -neither was there a question as to the price that would be paid for it. -Men--young men--young Americans, O God!--would be killed--actually -killed. Fellows whose places were in shops and offices and factories -and banks, whose diversions were the stadium, the sea-shore, or the -woods, would be called on to make the extreme sacrifice at a time when -sacrifice of any kind was being pooh-poohed. It was not only monstrous, -it was unnatural, a trend of events in the teeth of fate, and against -what one might reasonably call the manifest will of God. Lester knew -that his family were feeling this, though they never mentioned it; he -was feeling it himself. Molly Dove alone seemed to ride on the wave of -events like a sea-bird on a storm, cradled, rocked, at ease in her -element, secure, serene, sure of both present and ultimate good, -whatever might befall. - -So there came a Sunday when, after a mid-day dinner, the family -accompanied him to the station and he entrained for camp. He had said -good-by to Molly Dove during the forenoon. As no advance had been made -to her from the Lester side, she could make none on hers, and so judged -it wisest to keep out of sight. Her sweet self-effacement in doing this -made Lester swear that he would marry her at the first opportunity, as -he steamed away on this opening stage of what was to prove his long, -long, long way. - -That way, at the beginning, struck many people as a tortuous, futile -way, leading no-whither. There was talk of saluting the flag; there was -the occupation of Vera Cruz; there was the withdrawal from Vera Cruz; -there were months when the daily head-lines bore the names Huerta, -Villa, Carranza; and few knew for what reason the young men did not -come home. - -Then home they began to come, chiefly on furlough, to be sent -elsewhere. During one such interval Lester married Molly Dove. It meant -a breach with his family, none of whom appeared at the simple ceremony -or took any steps to acknowledge the bride. He was compelled to leave -her within a month. - -In the mean while greater wars than any possibility with Mexico had -broken out, and the iron entered the whole world's soul. It was only -then that the end of the road on which Lester had started out that -Sunday when he had entrained came into sight--and he sailed for France. - -His life after that could scarcely be distinguished from hundreds of -thousands of other lives. One overruling need had bound the manhood of -the race into a solidarity so tense that the individual was swallowed -up in it. Lester was no longer a son, a brother, a husband, the father -of a coming baby; he was an infinitesimal part of a huge machine, with -no more to say in matters of his life and death than the wheel to the -man who turns it round. He could only turn; he could only turn as he -was told; he could only turn as millions of other wheels were turning, -without volition, without knowledge, and, to a degree that surprised -him, without much preference or choice. - -In minutes when conscious of himself he could see how little he was the -Lester of other days. When he woke up in the morning it was often with -a strange, dull wonder as to what he had become, and how and why he had -become it. It was like a rebirth--only it suggested a rebirth into -hell. In fits of moral nausea, after some phase of a "good time," at -any date within the past ten years, he had called down on himself some -such fate as that; but he had never looked for it so literally, and -right here on earth. - -The inevitable came at last. By stages such as have often been -described, he found himself in that section of the trenches known to -its occupants as Dead Cow Lane. Life there was much as he expected it -to be, though possibly not quite so bad. Its worst feature was in the -long, dull hours it allowed for thinking. He loathed sitting on the -fire-step with nothing but a slouch, a grouch, and the wit of his mates -to keep him company. All that was humanly repulsive he learned to -endure; but when he lounged idly on the fire-step, one leg swung across -the other, and a dead cigarette between his lips, he ate his heart out. -Molly, waiting for her baby, in a tiny apartment with a kitchenette, -was a vision against a background of eyes that seemed to watch for him. -His father's were grave; his mother's steely; Cora's earnest; -Ethelind's wild. They looked down at him, right there in Dead Cow Lane, -in a vigil that made him frantic. When the command came at last to go -over the top it brought with it not only terror, but a break in the -monotony. - -What happened then was also along the lines he had been prepared for. -So many tales had been told him, and he had listened with such -eagerness that, from the minute of going up the death-ladder, he seemed -to have been through it all before. Everything went as if it had been -rehearsed. He had the lonely feeling on finding himself in the open -other men had described to him. As he ran through the lanes of barbed -wire his agony of haste was neither more nor less than theirs. The -"p'--p'--p'--p'--p'--p'" of the machine-guns; the crackling of bullets -through the air; the tottering and falling of his comrades, throwing up -their arms and tumbling clumsily on backs or faces, were all as if by -rule. He had no more consciousness than that. He was neither brave nor -afraid; he was only numb. It was something to be done, and he was doing -it. He might have been doing it in his sleep--in a nightmare. - -On reaching the German trench, which the barrage fire had crumpled into -a welter of earth, cement, timbers, uniforms, dead and wounded men, and -pots and pans, he practically tumbled in. There was no horror in the -minute, because horror has its limits and this had passed beyond them. -A wounded German was crawling away to anything that would shelter him, -and in order to scramble up Lester had to step on the man's head. The -head gave way, with an oath or a groan, but Lester managed to keep his -feet. All round him there was shouting and yelling and cursing, and now -and then a demoniac laugh. Every American was trying to kill his -German, and the Germans were at bay. Lester, too, was trying to kill. -The infection had caught him. Out of the blank, out of the numbness, -out of the paralysis of the spirit in which he had run across No Man's -Land, something surged up of which he had no time to take account. It -didn't wait for him to take account of it. It seized him with a -maddening pang--a hate to which he had never supposed his nature could -be equal--a hate welling up from the depths of his subconscious self--a -hate of the enemy--a hate of the German--a hate of the very first -individual who came his way--with a wild accompanying frenzy to stick -his bayonet in a heart. "Give 'em hell," were the words with which he -had been sent over, and all his life and all his longings and all his -love were fused in one red flame to deal out hell as it had been dealt -out to him. - -How he found himself face to face with a big, blond Bavarian, whose -blue eyes danced with a kind of bloodshot fire as he swung the butt of -his rifle like a club about his head, there is no way of telling. It -was one of those instances which war supplies by the million in which -world-rancors, race-rancors, and the suppressed irritations of -thousands of years sum themselves up in the hearts of two men who have -no personal quarrel and who have never set eyes on each other before. -It was like an unescapable destiny. The American broker and the -peasant-actor of Oberammergau had been projected toward each other by -an irresistible fate. Behind each were all the generations of rivalry -and covetousness and savagery and sin that had sent him forth. Neither -was moved by his own impulse. Each was but an instrument of the -passions of the past. - -Lester was not sure whether or not he saw double--whether or not there -were two Bavarians swinging the butts of their rifles, or only one. -Those who told the story afterward were in similar doubt. Some declared -for two; some for one only; some saw three or four in that corner of -the trench. In any case Lester had found his man; and no emotion he had -ever known was half so sweet as this anguish of pain to get him. - -Those who told the story afterward laughed as they pictured Lester -dancing this way and that to avoid the descending club and slip his -bayonet in under it. He dodged, they said, as if he were on springs. -Time and time again the Bavarian seemed about to sweep him with a blow -to the other end of the trench--but no! Lester was prancing as nimbly -as ever, watchful, alert, his aim always at the heart. No one could -tell how long this went on, for all observation was crazed. The only -thing known for certain was that in the end Lester got his weapon -in--and in--and in--to the hilt--to the heart--and that if he had had -time to go through the thick body he would have done it. - -He didn't have time, and it was here that the testimony was in -conflict. One man paid that the Bavarian was able to deal a last blow -with superhuman strength. Another declared that a second Bavarian dealt -it. Of those who came back some supported one of these assertions, and -some the other; but there was no difference of opinion at all on the -point that Lester's skull was cracked with a sound like that of a -breaking egg-shell. His body and his opponent's lay tumbled together in -a fierce embrace--the one with a surprised horror in the wide-open blue -eyes, while the other--but they only said of Lester that his face was -"all bashed in." - - - - -CHAPTER III - -Lester's face was "all bashed in," but Lester himself didn't know it. -The last thing he remembered was the queer, soft, mushy feeling as his -bayonet pierced the Bavarian's uniform and entered his body. His next -sensation was that of an emotion, a confused emotion, of sorrow, pity, -or disgust. - -At first it seemed all that had survived. He himself was -safe--somewhere--and the Bavarian had died. He didn't try to move, or -open his eyes, or seek to find out to what place they had carried him; -he was too comfortable for that. But--a man toward whom he had no -enmity on his own account, who was also perhaps a husband, with a -little wife waiting for a baby in an apartment with a kitchenette, that -man lay dead, with his, Lester's, bayonet wound in his heart. He was -sorry. He remembered his hate; he remembered his passion to kill; he -knew it as a blend of all the vengeances that had been stirring in his -blood since Belgium had been invaded, and the _Lusitania_ had been -sunk, and the awful things had begun to pile upon the awful things; but -it was a vengeance that began to seem to him beside the mark. It was -the kind of revenge man didn't know how to take; the kind of justice he -didn't know how to mete out. The innocent were being punished for the -guilty, as if a child were hanged because a man had committed a crime. -He couldn't say that he reproached himself for his part in that; he -knew he had been acting on orders from above; but he was conscious of a -deep regret that the world should have grown so stupid that such things -had to be. - -Otherwise he was resting. He supposed that he must have been wounded, -though he could feel no pain. Oddly enough, when he tested himself for -pain he didn't know where to begin. But it was his own immunity, his -sense of well-being and security, that sent his thought the more -persistently toward the man he had kept from ever returning home. - -Trying to fancy what that home was like, he found himself, suddenly but -naturally, in a village street, of which the bordering houses, of -plaster and timber, had low roofs and picturesque eaves. All round -there were mountains. - -"This is Oberammergau," he heard in a language he understood. "Here is -my home. Let us go in." - -They entered without the opening of doors, coming into a room with -rafters, small windows, and an air of antiquity. A woman was kneeling -beside a bed above which hung a carved wooden crucifix. On each side of -her knelt a quaintly dressed child, with hands stiffly pressed together. - -"That is my wife," said the voice. "Those are my children. They're -praying for me and asking that I shall come home." - -"Should you have liked to go home?" - -It seemed natural to Lester to ask this question. Everything seemed so -natural that he had not yet reached the point of inquiring how it had -come about. The Bavarian reflected. - -"I should have liked it before knowing what this is. I should like it -even now, for their sakes. But since death has to be destroyed in us -one at a time it's better for us to be here, don't you think?" - -Lester began to be startled. "Here? Where?" - -"Wherever it is we are. I don't quite know where that is. Do you? I'm -speaking," he continued, "in the old terms of place in the sense of -locality, because I don't know what else to do; but locality, of -course, is gone. We're in the universal, which makes it difficult for -us, after being used to so many limitations, to understand ourselves." - -Lester was aware of fear, awe, and irritation all struggling in him -together. - -"You may be in the universal, as you call it; but--but I've come -through." - -"We've both come through. The marvel is that we've done it so easily. -It's as I expected--only more so." - -"As you expected--in what way?" - -"Every way; all my life. When your barrage fire began I prayed--" - -"Do you fellows _pray_?" Lester asked, in astonishment. - -"Oh, some of us--what we used to call prayer--the sort of thing my poor -wife and children are doing now--begging--pleading that this or that -shall be done--instead of resting in strength, as you and I are." - -"I'm not--I'm not--resting in strength." - -"Oh yes, you are! You are, without knowing it. It's what human beings -are always doing. They get every kind of good in their lives, and don't -know the source from which it comes. You won't know to what your -present actual comfort is due till--" - -But the woman rose from her knees, and so did the children. Wiping away -their tears, they began the preparations for a frugal breakfast. As -Lester felt the presence that had accompanied him moving from his side -and enveloping all three in tenderness, he found himself alone with his -thought again. - -There was no shock to him in the fact that, as Molly had expressed it, -the mortal had put on immortality; he had faced the possibility for too -long. Ever since the first entraining he had accepted it as an -eventuality of war. On sailing for France he knew there were increased -chances against his ever coming home. In the months that followed he -grew accustomed to death and more or less obtuse to it. He smoked and -chaffed is the morning with fellows who by noon had gone--who could -tell where? They used the euphemism of "going west"--into the sunset, -into the glory, into the great repose. It was the easiest thing to say, -and many a time he had said it of himself. "By this time next year I -may have gone west." Then it became: "By this time next month I may -have gone west." Later it was: "By this time tomorrow--" "Within an -hour--" "Within half an hour--" "Within ten minutes--" as the seconds -slipped away. - -Well, he had gone west! The odd thing was that he had done it so -easily, so painlessly. The tedious hours in the trenches faded more or -less from recollection. The going over the top and all that followed -after it became nothing but a blur. Even the months in camp, in Texas, -behind the lines in France, dissolved like vapors when they mount into -the air. What was present to him most forcibly was the thought of the -dear ones he had left behind. - -His own conditions were entirely a matter of course; he was perfectly -at home in them. Though he could not have described them, nor have -given an account of them, he knew that they were pleasant and that they -were profoundly rooted in nature. He was neither surprised at them nor -unduly curious. - -Neither was he lonely. His sufficiency was such that companionship as -he had always conceived of it was not a consideration. The condition in -itself was companionship to a degree he could not understand. It was -vibrant with life; there was speech in it. Had he been forced to make -explanations, he would have said there was intelligence in it, and -comprehension. He let himself sink into the enjoyment of it as a baby -rests without questioning in the love by which it is enlapped. No; he -wasn't lonely; he didn't know what loneliness was. - -But he felt care--the care for Molly, the fear of the blow that would -fall on his father and mother and sisters. Now that he knew what had -happened, his thought fixed itself on finding some way by which he -could help them. - -On this point he wondered why, if the Bavarian could return to his home -and whisper something of comfort, he could not return to his. Distance -was not a factor, since it was no part of the universal. Even the gulf -between the material and the non-material could in a measure be -crossed. Why, then, could he not cross it? - -"Is it because I've been such a bad fellow?" he asked himself. - -"Not entirely," the Bavarian answered, as if the words had been -addressed to him. "It isn't a question of what we've done so much as it -is of what we know. It's a matter of thought, of consciousness. When -we've learned that everything exists in a great mind, that mind itself -becomes the medium of intercourse. Give up the idea that the people you -love live in one sphere and you in another. We all live together in one -great intelligence that understands all our needs. Meet your needs not -by your own efforts, but by co-operation with that intelligence, and -what you want will be done." - -Lester reflected on that. "What do you mean by co-operation?" - -"Trust, in the first place--till trust becomes knowledge." - -"But if this intelligence knows already what I need--?" - -"It will do the wise thing, only you won't be associated with it. What -you want is the association, to have your part. You don't get your -part, you don't have the association, because you isolate yourself. -Your mind is closed to the powers and activities that are all about -you. When you understand what they are you will have your share in -them." - -"But why should my mind be closed if yours is open?" - -"It's a matter of habit. We go on here from the very point at which we -left off there. I had the habit already. Our life at Oberammergau bred -it into one. You didn't have it. Your thoughts were limited to a -physical world and a physical body and a physical way of doing -everything. Now you have it all to learn, very much as you had in your -physical childhood." - -"Then I'm not being punished for my sins?" - -He asked the question in some uneasiness. - -"You are. Don't you see? The punishment is that you're not more -advanced. You've been like the idle boy in school; and now you find it -hard to catch up. If it were not for the great thing you've done you'd -be farther behind than you are." - -"The great thing I've done? I don't understand you." - -"Every good act helps us onward; and among things that are good love is -the greatest. Of that you've given the highest proof there is." - -Lester was astounded. - -"I?" - -"You gave the most precious things you had--your business, your -happiness, your family, your wife, your life. You held nothing back. -You not only gave without reserve, but you gave without complaining. -You didn't do it for yourself, but for a great cause--as men conceive -of causes--and you did it of your own free will." - -"And so did you." - -"No; I waited to be taken. If I hadn't been taken I shouldn't have -gone. I didn't offer myself up; I was seized against my will. You were -the more like Jesus of Nazareth, Who laid down His life for His -friends, and so, as He said Himself, losing your life you have found -it." - -"Oh, but I didn't do it in that way at all," Lester protested. - -"It doesn't take anything away from right that we do it as a matter of -course. We don't have to know the infinite intelligence to have the -infinite intelligence know us. Isn't it a case of 'He that doeth the -Will'? If we do the Will instinctively we can't fail of the protection -of Him whose Will is done; and if we don't know Him already we can be -sure He will make Himself known." - -Communication once more came to an end, not abruptly, but by natural -cessation, because the thought had been expressed. - -But Lester was left with a clue to follow, and little by little he -followed it. The immediate gain was a new kind of perception. It was as -if some faculty already possessed, but paralyzed within him, had been -freed. He could not have said that this endowment existed in hearing, -or sight, or any of the senses, or in all of them together, or in none -of them. All he could say was that it gave him a new use of power, of -power to which he had a right, but of which, for a reason that escaped -him, he had hitherto been deprived. - - - - -CHAPTER IV - -As with this power there came freedom, expansion, and growth, he found -himself able to reconstruct out of thought the house he had formerly -called home. - -He was back in it all at once--without effort, without coming from a -distance, without journeying through space, without meeting the -discords between timelessness and time. He was simply there, walking -about the rooms and halls as he had done ever since his childhood. - -He judged it to be evening, for his father was at home. It was what he, -Lester, had wanted. His appeal was to be for Molly, that the family -should pity her, should take her in, should make her one of themselves, -and help her through the time that was ahead of her. He knew his -appearing might be a shock to them, but it would be a shock to his -father least of all. - -The father was seated in the dining-room, reading a book by an electric -lamp. When the supper was cleared away, he could have this room to -himself. It was a cheerful room, with deep-red curtains drawn, and a -deep-red cloth on the table. Lester entered without journeying through -space, much as he had been in the habit of entering all his life. His -sense of presence, of vitality, was so strong that he wondered his -father did not look up. - -"Father!" - -But the father kept on reading. - -"Father!" - -There was no indication that he had been heard. - -He went nearer. He placed himself where he must be seen. He spoke with -more force. - -"Father! I want to talk to you about Molly." - -The father turned a page. Lester could hear the rattle of the paper. He -could hear the little cough when his father cleared his throat. He -could see the dark shade in his father's cheeks which showed he needed -shaving. There was nothing about that well-known face obscure or -unfamiliar; but he could make no sign of his coming that could be -recognized. - -Presently Cora came in and sat down. She began to talk about the book -in her father's hands. To Lester it was like something on the stage, -something done by human beings, but not part of life's reality. It -struck him for the first time that mortal happenings pass in a realm of -illusion. - -From the fact that Cora was in colors he inferred that the news from -France had not yet reached them. - -"Cora," he said, "I want to talk to you about Molly." - -"Oh, it's interesting enough," Cora admitted, in response to something -said by her father, "especially the first part; but so trivial. If the -dead really do live again I should think they'd find some better -occupation than playing with a ouija-board." - -"A ouija-board," the father argued, "might be only the simplest means -they can find of getting their messages over." - -"Then, since they're so limited in what they can do, why shouldn't they -tell us something worth our knowing, when they've got the opportunity? -This boy"--she waved her hand toward the book--"does no more than -describe the same old life on earth--with variations." - -"But perhaps with variations they live the same old life on earth." - -"Then I don't want to believe in it." Cora's manner was decisive and -professional as such manners are depicted by actresses. "As a matter of -fact," she summed up, "the more I think, and the more I read, the less -I'm inclined to accept a life beyond the grave as a possibility. Such -books"--again she indicated that in her father's hand--"express a -natural human yearning, as do also the myths of the New Testament, -but--" She left her sentence there. The father, too, left it there, as -if at heart he agreed with her. - -"I wonder where mother is," Lester asked himself, and immediately was -in her room upstairs. - -She was seated before a mirror, trying on a hat. Another hat was on a -chair beside her. Two bandboxes with a disarray of silver paper stood -beside her on the floor. Ethelind, short-skirted, and moving with -nimble, sylphlike feet, was standing back to get the effect. - -"I think I like that one the better of the two," she was saying, "and -yet I don't know but--" - -"Oh, they're awful, both of them," the mother complained. "It's funny I -can never get a hat that suits me but the same old thing." - -Lester went forward. He meant that she should see him first in the -mirror. The reflection would startle her, of course, but he should be -able to reassure her. - -It was he who was startled first, since, standing before the mirror, he -didn't get his own reflection. He felt so solid, so warm, so full of -energy, that it seemed to him impossible that a reflection should not -be cast. But there was nothing--nothing but the image of his mother -casting her bright eyes up at the cockatoo crest on a hat that -suggested a Mephistopheles. - -"Mother, I want to talk to you about Molly." - -"Oh, dear, what an old hag I'm beginning to look!" - -"Oh no, you're not, mother dear," Ethelind returned, cheerfully. -"That's just worry. One of these days the war will be over and he'll be -coming back a great general--" - -"What's the use of the war being over and his coming back a great -general, when that creature will have the first say in him?" - -Ethelind came behind her mother, to give the hat a twitch to a more -effective angle. - -"Mother dear, I don't believe he'd like to have you talk in that way." - -Lester appealed to his sister. - -"Ethelind, I want you to help me. I want you all to think of Molly. I'm -not coming home; but I'm well and happy. That is, I could be happy if I -only knew that she was being taken care of and that you were good to -her." - -But Ethelind only twitched the hat again, and the subject dropped. As -it did a curtain seemed to come down on the scenes that had meant home -to him, once more suggesting the action of a play. - -There followed for Lester a further phase of unfolding thought, though -with no solution of some of his perplexities. - -"But it's always so," the Bavarian explained to him. "We can go to them -more easily than they can come to us. The spiritual can to some slight -degree re-embody the material; but spiritual things are only -spiritually discerned. Jesus of Nazareth after His Resurrection could -at times reincarnate Himself before His disciples; but they could not -spiritualize themselves so as to follow Him when He disappeared. That -can only be accomplished in proportion as they lay off the mortal and -temporary by degrees, or burst out of it with a bound, as you and I -did." - -And yet in Lester's consciousness the vibrancy of life in his -surroundings grew more tense. It was as if he were rising and ever -rising on a mounting wave of vitality, but always riding on the top. -Something like this energy he had felt in running, or rowing, or -swimming, or on horseback, or in one or another of the sports in which -he had excelled; but never with this joyousness of strength. The -physical had given some sign of it, though it had been no more than as -the single note of a shepherd's pipe to the fullness of an orchestra, -or as the tramp of a lone step to the onrush of a million men. - -And in one such swelling, exultant, glorious moment he came where Molly -was in her little living-room in the apartment with a kitchenette. She -was sitting at a table, with two or three books before her. One of them -was open and to it from time to time she dropped her eyes. She raised -them soon again to look straight into the air, as if she saw beyond -walls into the reality where he was. There was no trouble in her eyes, -nor sorrow, nor anxiety. In every feature there was peace, with the -look of expectation. - -He did not try at once to enter into communication with her. It was -enough for him to study the pure face with its expression of repose. -But he followed her thought as her eyes fell to the page of the book -again. It was as if he were reading the words himself: - - -"And if Christ be not raised, your faith is vain; ye are yet in your -sins. . . . If in this life only we have hope in Christ, we are of all -men most miserable. But now is Christ risen from the dead, and become -the first fruits of them that slept. For since by man came death, by -man came also the resurrection of the dead." - - -She lifted her eyes and reflected on that. He drew nearer, bending over -and about her. - -"Molly, I'm here." - -He saw her expression brighten. It was almost as if she had said, "Yes, -I know." - -"I want you to know, darling, that I'm not coming home." - -Whatever was passing through her mind, she nodded, though no shade fell -on her bright face. - -"I'm well," he continued. "You must think of me as happy and as taken -care of." - -Again there was that nod, as if she assented to something she had -heard. Presently she began to read again: - - -"Then cometh the end, when he shall have delivered up the kingdom to -God, even the Father; when he shall have put down all rule and all -authority and power. For he must reign, all he hath put all enemies -under his feet. The last enemy that shall be destroyed is death." - - -"That enemy is destroyed, Molly. I've proved it. There's no death; -there's nothing but life. There's not even a shock, or a minute of -unhappiness. There's nothing but life, and then more life, and then -life again. I was never so alive as I am at this instant, or so capable -of doing things. Except for you, Molly, sweet one, and the baby that's -coming, and the family, I wouldn't go back." - -If her eyes grew grave it was with thought and not with foreboding. She -returned once more to her book: - - -"For this corruptible must put on incorruption, and this mortal must -put on immortality. So when this corruptible shall have put on -incorruption and this mortal shall have put on immortality, then shall -be brought to pass the saying that is written, Death is swallowed up in -victory." - - -"Yes," he said to her, "that is what has happened to me. Death has been -swallowed up in victory. If strength and energy and safety and joy -constitute victory, then I'm victorious. If it were not for you, O my -love--" - -But she closed her book suddenly and rose. As she did so he could hear -the words she uttered, almost aloud. - -"I must do that," she said, with determination. "It's what he'd like. I -must take it on myself." - - - - -CHAPTER V - -He lost her for a while, and when he saw her again she was in the open -air. He was with her, though not exactly by her side. As far as he -could judge he was both leading her and following after her. He was -above her, and also holding her hand. If he could have been everywhere -about her at one and the same instant, it was that. - -It seemed to be Sunday. There was no work going on in the streets, and -there was the Sunday air of leisure. Molly walked rapidly, her eyes -toward the ground. Her whole little figure expressed concentration of -purpose. - -He knew the suburb. The shady streets, the trim green lawns, the low -stone walls with vines tumbling over them, the wooden houses painted -for the most part in dull tones of red and yellow, were those with -which he had always been familiar. High on a knoll he saw the deep -verandas of his own old home. Molly did not hesitate. She turned in at -the gate. - -There was a short driveway, between clumps of shrubbery and under elms. -At a sudden turning she met Ethelind. The two girls stopped and looked -at each other as they came face to face. - -"You're Ethelind, aren't you?" Molly said, without trembling or -awkwardness. - -Ethelind's wild eyes were all ablaze. - -"Yes, and you're Molly. I'm--I'm so glad you've come. I've wanted to -know you. I was coming one day to see you--I don't care what any one -says. I know it's what my brother would want me to do. We--we miss him -so." - -"Thank you," Molly said, with a gentle smile. "I'm glad you thought of -me so kindly. Just now there's something I want to say to your father -or mother. Do you think either of them would see me?" - -Ethelind's face fell. - -"I--I can't say--for sure. They're--Oh, I don't know!--But my brother--" - -"Yes, I know all that; but this is something important." - -The girl seized the sister-in-law's arm. "It--it isn't--anything -you've--you've heard?" - -"It's nothing I've heard; it's only something that I feel I know." - -But they had been seen from the window. The mother came running out, -all her gay audacity transformed, as a lamp is transformed when, -instead of giving light, it becomes the center of conflagration. - -"Oh, what is it? What is it?" she cried, as she hurried toward them. - -"It's nothing very definite, Mrs. Lester," Molly replied, calmly. "It's -only something I feel so strongly that--" - -"Oh, feel!" Mrs. Lester exclaimed, impatiently. "Don't frighten us with -feelings when--" - -"Is Mr. Lester in? I should like to talk to him as well." - -The mother led the way toward the house. Molly followed, Ethelind -clinging to her arm. It did not occur to any of them that no farther -explanation had been made as to who Molly was. That seemed to take -itself for granted. - -The father was in the hall at the foot of the stairs. Cora was coming -down them. Both had been summoned by the sense of something wrong. -Molly went straight to her husband's father. - -"Oh, I want to tell you, Mr. Lester; I feel I have a message." - -"Feel you have a message?" he echoed, with a kind of tremulous -severity. "What do you mean by that?" - -"I don't know what I mean; only this morning he--he seemed to come and -stand beside me--" - -"Nonsense!" It was Cora who said that, from the position in which she -had come to a standstill half-way down the stairs. To Molly she seemed -very magisterial and commanding. "Nonsense!" she repeated. "This is -pure nervousness--or hysterics." - -"No, it isn't, Miss Lester," Molly contradicted, not rudely, but with -imploring earnestness. "I'm sure he did come. He spoke to me. -_Something_ spoke to me." - -"Did you hear anything?" the mother demanded. - -"No, it wasn't in words; or if it was in words it was only as it turned -itself into words in my own mind. It was more like--like a -conviction--an intense conviction--that came to me from outside." - -"And what did your conviction say?" Cora inquired, icily. - -"It said-- Oh, you must forgive me!--I shouldn't come if I didn't feel -it so strongly!--It's as hard for me as it is for you--" - -The father backed away to the baluster. His face had grown gray. The -mother dropped to a hall chair. Ethelind was crying already, but -standing by as if to give aid. Cora was still commanding and severe. It -was she who interrupted. - -"Yes; we understand all that. But tell us what you've come to say." - -Under this authority and severity Molly began to grow nervous. She -clasped and unclasped her hands, sometimes twisting her fingers. - -"You see, it was this way. I was reading the Bible and--and -thinking--and trying to understand what it meant---when all at once -he--he seemed to be with me--and to be saying things." - -"What sort of things?" - -"I don't exactly know, Miss Lester. I knew he was there--and that he -was telling me how beautiful it was with him--but I can't explain how -he made me understand it--" - -"No," Cora interrupted again, "nobody ever can explain. Once they get -notions into their heads, they seem to think explanations are not -important." She came down to the second lowest step, but still stood -over the trembling young wife in her attitude of authority. "This is -all nerves, my dear--and excitement. The book you were reading--oh, -yes, it's a very good book, and full of the wisdom of the ages and all -that!--But it reacted on you in such a way that you've conjured up -these frightening things--" - -"But I'm not frightened at all," Molly burst out. "That's the wonderful -part of it. If he hadn't come and told me beforehand, and made me feel -how happy he is, I should have been. But I'm not now; and I don't want -you to be. That's why I came." - -"Yes; no doubt," Miss Lester agreed, coldly. "But now that you've come, -you'll do well to run home again and try to calm yourself and be -sensible. If my brother has been"--she stumbled at the word, but forced -herself to utter it--"if my brother has been--k-killed--we shall hear -of it from the proper authorities." - -"Cora, that's not fair," Ethelind cried, indignantly. "Molly's come -over here to warn us, and even if she's wrong--" She broke off to make -another sort of appeal. "Father, can't you say something? Here's your -son's wife--the mother of the child he's expecting--" - -But Mrs. Lester rose, still clinging to her chair. - -"If this is a ruse for getting into our house and making our -acquaintance whether we would or no--" - -"Mother, how can you?" came from Ethelind. "You deserve that your son -should never be given back to you. Father, can't you say anything at -all?" - -But what the father did say was uttered brokenly. "I don't--I don't -believe it. He's not--not dead. She's come here to get us to own -her--to take her in--" - -"And if we don't," Ethelind cried, "and she goes away again, I'll go -with her. Whether he comes back or not I shall be there." - -It was extraordinary to Lester that he could look on at this scene -without conscious pain. It Was exactly as if he had watched them -rehearsing a play in which emotions were simulated but not experienced. -When the rehearsal was over they would become their actual selves -again. Beyond hardness, and suffering, and misunderstanding he could -see the end. - -He could see the end as Molly cast an imploring look around her and -prepared to depart. Ethelind, who was already in street clothes, gave -all the signs of going with her. Over them both Lester threw the -protection of his love, which apparently gave them nerve. Neither of -them flinched; but it was in Molly that the real valor shone. She was -both quiet and firm as she took her few steps toward the door, Ethelind -clinging to her arm. - -But at the door there was a ring, and on the porch outside there stood -a boy with a telegram in his hand. - -"Charles E. Lester live here?" - -Ethelind seized the envelope, while with feverish fingers Cora signed -for it. The father took it in his hands and held it helplessly. - -The mother uttered one great cry. - -"Open it!" - -He opened it--read it--and let it flutter to the floor. - -Cora snatched it up; but she, too, dropped it after a hurried glance. -She stood as if turned to stone. - -The mother took it--sat down deliberately--read it carefully--read it -again--read it again--and folding it, slipped it into the bosom of her -gown. - -Molly and Ethelind had not waited. They had not needed to hear the -news. Rather they were eager to run away. It was Molly, however, who -pressed onward, dragging the other with her--out to the porch--down the -steps--on to the driveway. - -The three in the hallway remained as if paralyzed, without tears, -without words, seemingly without thoughts. - -The mother came first to the possession of her faculties. - -"Stop her," she cried, in a deep, tragic voice a little like a man's. -"Stop her. Bring her back." She struggled to her feet, hurrying toward -the door. "She's my dead son's wife. He spoke to her. He's not dead. -He's alive. If he wasn't alive he couldn't have come to her. Stop her. -Call her back. She's my child. Nothing shall take her away from me." - -Lester saw the two girls pause, while Ethelind whispered: - -"Go back. She's calling you." - -Slowly Molly turned round. Slowly she mounted the steps of the veranda. -The vision faded out as Lester saw his mother's arms go round the neck -of his young wife and draw her close. - -But it faded out in radiance. It also faded out in confidence. He was -not only at peace, he was at peace with the certainty of a vast -readjustment. - -It was readjustment in himself first of all--the adaptation of the -"fan" at ball-games, and of the broker of The Street, to the eternities -of which he could just discern the beginnings. - -Then it would be the readjustment of his family--to each other--to -Molly--to their memory of him. A new kind of tenderness would settle -down among them with a new and farther outlook. - -It would be the readjustment, too, of his country--to a new -world-position--to a wider world responsibility. In the ending of -enmities it would play a ruling part. - -And it would be the readjustment of nations to nations, and of men to -men. The blind hatreds that had hurled him against the Bavarian and the -Bavarian against him would cease. Their folly would be recognized. Of -the blood that had been shed, and was still to be shed, this would be -the recompense. It would be shed to its highest purpose when it should -be shown that it had been shed in vain. - -Soon those who were in the turmoil that mortals create for one another -would have come west like himself--into the sunset, into the glory, -into the great repose. They would come into the great activities, too, -where work never ceases, and strength never tires, and love never -wanes. And as he turned into the radiance he felt content to wait -patiently for that. - - -THE END - - - - - - - - - - - -End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Going West, by Basil King - -*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK GOING WEST *** - -***** This file should be named 60395-0.txt or 60395-0.zip ***** -This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: - http://www.gutenberg.org/6/0/3/9/60395/ - -Produced by Al Haines & the online Distributed Proofreaders -Canada team at http://www.pgdpcanada.net - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will -be renamed. - -Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright -law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, -so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United -States without permission and without paying copyright -royalties. 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You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of -the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at -www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have -to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook. - -Title: Going West - -Author: Basil King - -Release Date: September 30, 2019 [EBook #60395] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: UTF-8 - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK GOING WEST *** - - - - -Produced by Al Haines & the online Distributed Proofreaders -Canada team at http://www.pgdpcanada.net - - - - - - -</pre> - - -<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p><br /><br /></p> - -<p class="t3"> - <span class="smcap">Books by</span><br /> -<br /> - BASIL KING<br /> -<br /> - GOING WEST<br /> - THE CITY OF COMRADES<br /> - ABRAHAM'S BOSOM<br /> - THE LIFTED VEIL<br /> - THE SIDE OF THE ANGELS<br /> - THE LETTER OF THE CONTRACT<br /> - THE WAY HOME<br /> - THE WILD OLIVE<br /> - THE INNER SHRINE<br /> - THE STREET CALLED STRAIGHT<br /> - LET NO MAN PUT ASUNDER<br /> - IN THE GARDEN OF CHARITY<br /> - THE STEPS OF HONOR<br /> - THE HIGH HEART<br /> -<br /> - HARPER & BROTHERS, NEW YORK<br /> - <span class="smcap">Established 1817</span><br /> -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p class="illustration"> -<a id="img-front"></a> -<img src="images/img-front.jpg" alt="Frontispiece" /> -</p> - -<h1> -<br /><br /> - GOING WEST<br /> -</h1> - -<p class="t3b"> - By<br /> -</p> - -<p class="t2"> - Basil King<br /> -</p> - -<p class="t4"> - <i>Author of<br /> - "The City of Comrades" "Abraham's Bosom" etc.</i><br /> -</p> - -<p><br /><br /></p> - -<p class="t3"> - HARPER & BROTHERS PUBLISHERS<br /> - NEW YORK AND LONDON<br /> -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p class="t4"> - <span class="smcap">Going West</span><br /> -<br /> - Copyright, 1919, by Harper & Brothers<br /> - Printed in the United States of America<br /> - Published June, 1919<br /> -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p class="t3"> -GOING WEST -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<p class="t2"> -GOING WEST -</p> - -<p><br /></p> - -<h3> -CHAPTER I -</h3> - -<p> -He was not a born fighter, in spite of a -big, husky frame through which the -urge of physical life was strong. On the -contrary, he was a civilian and a business -man in every nerve of his body. Eight -generations on American soil had bred a type -essentially industrious, notwithstanding all -the fighting in which the family had been -engaged. His father had fought in the -Spanish-American War; his grandfather in -the Civil War; his great-great-grandfather -in the Revolution; farther back, his ancestors -in the Connecticut Valley had beaten off the -French and Indians for nearly a hundred -years. -</p> - -<p> -All that, however, had been alien to the -main purposes of life. It had been incidental, -not professional. Its chief influence on Lester -lay in the assumption that, men being -called for on the borders of Texas and in -Mexico, he had no choice but to go. True, -he was just beginning, after certain wayward -years, to see success as a broker ahead of -him; and within the month he had become -engaged to Molly Dove. But these considerations -could not weigh against the appeal -of country, nor annul those traditions of duty -that had come to him from the past. -</p> - -<p> -So in the course of time, and with the -march of events, he found himself in the -enemy trenches, facing a burly blue-eyed -Teuton holding a rifle by the barrel and -swinging the butt about his head, while he -himself held a bayonet in his hand. Amid -the wreckage, the carnage, the tumult, he -was desperately trying to recall his instructions -as to how to stick the weapon in. -</p> - -<p> -Before telling what happened then, let us -go back and follow rapidly the stages by -which Lester found himself in a situation -which two or three years earlier he would -have laughed out of the list of possibilities. -</p> - -<p> -The son of a well-to-do bookseller in a -great Atlantic city, he was an instance of that -reaction against the paternal bent with which -we are all familiar. His father was a gentle, -scholarly man who loved books as books. -The Spanish-American campaign had left -him with one leg slightly shorter than the -other, and the air of a retired general. All -his longings had once focused themselves into -the hope that his son would enter into, and -one day inherit, a business built up on years -of diligence and judgment—only to be disappointed. -</p> - -<p> -Lester had no interest in books. He was -not only an open-air fellow with a zest for -sports, but he had all the inclinations of a -genial, jovial soul. Taking wine, women, and -song as kindred joys, he chose brokerage as -the profession that would give him closest -touch with the merry give and take of life. -</p> - -<p> -As a broker he could steal all the time he -needed to "root" at games, after he had -ceased to play them actively, while the same -career rendered him more free to marry a girl -like Molly Dove, a waitress in the cafĂ© where -he generally lunched, to whom his family -bitterly objected. -</p> - -<p> -His mother was a small, square-shouldered -woman, with a smile so bright that it was -difficult for the most penetrating eye to see -behind it. Lester had inherited her dark -color, her beetling brows, and her vigorous -physique. A gay audacity, as real as it -looked, was also not the least among the -legacies she passed on to her son. -</p> - -<p> -Of his two sisters, Cora resembled the -father and Ethelind the mother. Ethelind, -too, had that gay audacity, the most patent -result of which was to involve her in conflicting -love-affairs. A wild-eyed thing, she -was formed on that permanent-seventeen -model that came in with the second decade -of the twentieth century and induced all -women, whatever their time of life, to dress -as school-girls. Cora, tall, dignified, reserved, -was the graduate of a woman's college, -in which it was her ambition one day to -hold a professorship. To sisters as well as -parents the stalwart, wilful boy would have -been the king among young men had it not -been for his entanglement with Molly Dove. -They could pardon his "wildness," knowing -that it would pass, but they found it hard to -forgive his choice of a wife in a sphere so -much below him. In fact, they did not -pardon it at all. In spite of his announcement -that the engagement had become definite, -no one responded to his invitation to -make the acquaintance of the girl. -</p> - -<p> -In the matter of his "wildness" there were -already stirrings of a change of heart, -though they hardly rose to the level of active -consciousness. Such reforms as he made were -avowedly in deference to Molly Dove. In -cutting out—the term was his—women, wine, -and song, he made it clear to himself that -he did it, not in obedience to a moral law, but -because "Molly asked him to." Molly held -the odd conviction that such indulgences were -wrong, chiefly because they came in between -him and a great mystery, of which he had -heard vaguely all his life, but from which instinctively -he turned his mind away. -</p> - -<p> -"There's really no mystery at all," she -asserted, in that pretty way of hers which he -found at once tranquil and enthusiastic, "no -more than there's a mystery about the sun. -When we fill the atmosphere with smoke we -can't see it; but that doesn't keep the sun -from being there. Blow the smoke away, -and you find the sunshine as bright as -ever." -</p> - -<p> -He liked to hear her talk in that way, -though he was not won by her beliefs. Far -in the future he saw days when he would -have shot the bolt of his temptations and -settled down with her into being the "good -fellow" she hoped to make of him. In the -mean time— -</p> - -<p> -But in the mean time came the call. It was -the kind of call against which his instincts -and his interests both rebelled, but he took it -with no more analysis than he gave to the -necessity of getting out of bed on a winter's -morning. There was no help for it; it was -all in the day's work. -</p> - -<p> -His family took it in the same way. It -was as much a matter of course as when -Ebenezer Lester shouldered his eighteenth-century -musket to defend the stockade -against the Iroquois stealing down from -Canada. It was as much a matter of course -as when Charles E. Lester, the bookseller, -rallied to President McKinley against Spain. -</p> - -<p> -It was also a matter of course to Molly -Dove. It would postpone the wedding for -which she had begun her simple preparations, -but she had a curious, secret facility for renouncing -her own will. Her right-about-face -was made with smiling lips and glistening -eyes, and no effort that any one could see. -To Lester she whispered: -</p> - -<p> -"It's going to be all right, dear. Whatever -the clash of human wills, there's only one real -Ruler in the universe. The closer we can -keep in touch with Him the nearer we shall -be to the usefulness and happiness which -make up what we call our destiny." -</p> - -<p> -"That's all very well." He smiled, patting -her hand. "But suppose I'm shot—or die -of a fever?" -</p> - -<p> -Her reply would have staggered him if he -had not put it down to the sweet and charming -eccentricity which made her different -from other girls. -</p> - -<p> -"Well, suppose it does happen that in the -course of doing your duty this mortal -should 'put on immortality'—that's the way -the Bible expresses it, you know—wouldn't -that be a gain for you? And what's a gain -for you couldn't be a loss for us." -</p> - -<p> -He laughed with a great guffaw. "But -perhaps we shouldn't be married." -</p> - -<p> -"No; but marriage, after all, is only for -time, whereas you and I are bound by all -sorts of ties which really belong to eternity." -</p> - -<p> -He took no stock in that, he told her; but -he liked her gleaming earnestness in saying -it. The aunt who had brought her up must -have been a quaint, religious character, he -said, to have filled her head with such other-worldly -notions. Anyhow, they were different -from the anxiety and fear which the -family hid behind their stoic calmness, and -of which he felt the twinges within himself -as he wound up his affairs. -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<h3> -CHAPTER II -</h3> - -<p> -It was at the time when the possibility of -a war with Mexico—or any war at all—struck -the imagination of the country as a -calamity too horrible to contemplate. There -was no question as to the victory, but neither -was there a question as to the price that -would be paid for it. Men—young men—young -Americans, O God!—would be killed—actually -killed. Fellows whose places were -in shops and offices and factories and banks, -whose diversions were the stadium, the sea-shore, -or the woods, would be called on to -make the extreme sacrifice at a time when -sacrifice of any kind was being pooh-poohed. -It was not only monstrous, it was unnatural, -a trend of events in the teeth of fate, and -against what one might reasonably call the -manifest will of God. Lester knew that his -family were feeling this, though they never -mentioned it; he was feeling it himself. -Molly Dove alone seemed to ride on the -wave of events like a sea-bird on a storm, -cradled, rocked, at ease in her element, secure, -serene, sure of both present and ultimate -good, whatever might befall. -</p> - -<p> -So there came a Sunday when, after a mid-day -dinner, the family accompanied him to -the station and he entrained for camp. He -had said good-by to Molly Dove during the -forenoon. As no advance had been made to -her from the Lester side, she could make none -on hers, and so judged it wisest to keep out -of sight. Her sweet self-effacement in doing -this made Lester swear that he would marry -her at the first opportunity, as he steamed -away on this opening stage of what was to -prove his long, long, long way. -</p> - -<p> -That way, at the beginning, struck many -people as a tortuous, futile way, leading no-whither. -There was talk of saluting the flag; -there was the occupation of Vera Cruz; there -was the withdrawal from Vera Cruz; there -were months when the daily head-lines bore -the names Huerta, Villa, Carranza; and few -knew for what reason the young men did not -come home. -</p> - -<p> -Then home they began to come, chiefly on -furlough, to be sent elsewhere. During one -such interval Lester married Molly Dove. It -meant a breach with his family, none of -whom appeared at the simple ceremony or -took any steps to acknowledge the bride. -He was compelled to leave her within a -month. -</p> - -<p> -In the mean while greater wars than any -possibility with Mexico had broken out, and -the iron entered the whole world's soul. It -was only then that the end of the road on -which Lester had started out that Sunday -when he had entrained came into sight—and -he sailed for France. -</p> - -<p> -His life after that could scarcely be distinguished -from hundreds of thousands of -other lives. One overruling need had bound -the manhood of the race into a solidarity so -tense that the individual was swallowed up -in it. Lester was no longer a son, a brother, -a husband, the father of a coming baby; he -was an infinitesimal part of a huge machine, -with no more to say in matters of his life and -death than the wheel to the man who turns -it round. He could only turn; he could only -turn as he was told; he could only turn as -millions of other wheels were turning, without -volition, without knowledge, and, to a -degree that surprised him, without much -preference or choice. -</p> - -<p> -In minutes when conscious of himself he -could see how little he was the Lester of other -days. When he woke up in the morning it -was often with a strange, dull wonder as to -what he had become, and how and why he -had become it. It was like a rebirth—only -it suggested a rebirth into hell. In fits of -moral nausea, after some phase of a "good -time," at any date within the past ten years, -he had called down on himself some such fate -as that; but he had never looked for it so literally, -and right here on earth. -</p> - -<p> -The inevitable came at last. By stages -such as have often been described, he found -himself in that section of the trenches known -to its occupants as Dead Cow Lane. Life -there was much as he expected it to be, though -possibly not quite so bad. Its worst feature -was in the long, dull hours it allowed for -thinking. He loathed sitting on the fire-step -with nothing but a slouch, a grouch, and the -wit of his mates to keep him company. -All that was humanly repulsive he learned to -endure; but when he lounged idly on the fire-step, -one leg swung across the other, and a -dead cigarette between his lips, he ate his heart -out. Molly, waiting for her baby, in a tiny -apartment with a kitchenette, was a vision -against a background of eyes that seemed to -watch for him. His father's were grave; his -mother's steely; Cora's earnest; Ethelind's -wild. They looked down at him, right there -in Dead Cow Lane, in a vigil that made him -frantic. When the command came at last -to go over the top it brought with it not only -terror, but a break in the monotony. -</p> - -<p> -What happened then was also along the -lines he had been prepared for. So many -tales had been told him, and he had listened -with such eagerness that, from the minute -of going up the death-ladder, he seemed to -have been through it all before. Everything -went as if it had been rehearsed. He had -the lonely feeling on finding himself in the -open other men had described to him. As -he ran through the lanes of barbed wire -his agony of haste was neither more nor less -than theirs. The "p'—p'—p'—p'—p'—p'" -of the machine-guns; the crackling of bullets -through the air; the tottering and falling of -his comrades, throwing up their arms and -tumbling clumsily on backs or faces, were all -as if by rule. He had no more consciousness -than that. He was neither brave nor afraid; -he was only numb. It was something to be -done, and he was doing it. He might have -been doing it in his sleep—in a nightmare. -</p> - -<p> -On reaching the German trench, which -the barrage fire had crumpled into a welter -of earth, cement, timbers, uniforms, dead -and wounded men, and pots and pans, he -practically tumbled in. There was no horror -in the minute, because horror has its limits -and this had passed beyond them. A -wounded German was crawling away to anything -that would shelter him, and in order -to scramble up Lester had to step on the -man's head. The head gave way, with an -oath or a groan, but Lester managed to keep -his feet. All round him there was shouting -and yelling and cursing, and now and then a -demoniac laugh. Every American was trying -to kill his German, and the Germans were -at bay. Lester, too, was trying to kill. The -infection had caught him. Out of the blank, -out of the numbness, out of the paralysis of the -spirit in which he had run across No Man's -Land, something surged up of which he -had no time to take account. It didn't wait -for him to take account of it. It seized him -with a maddening pang—a hate to which -he had never supposed his nature could -be equal—a hate welling up from the -depths of his subconscious self—a hate of -the enemy—a hate of the German—a hate -of the very first individual who came his -way—with a wild accompanying frenzy to -stick his bayonet in a heart. "Give 'em -hell," were the words with which he had -been sent over, and all his life and all his -longings and all his love were fused in one -red flame to deal out hell as it had been -dealt out to him. -</p> - -<p> -How he found himself face to face with a -big, blond Bavarian, whose blue eyes danced -with a kind of bloodshot fire as he swung -the butt of his rifle like a club about his head, -there is no way of telling. It was one of those -instances which war supplies by the million -in which world-rancors, race-rancors, and -the suppressed irritations of thousands of -years sum themselves up in the hearts of -two men who have no personal quarrel and -who have never set eyes on each other before. -It was like an unescapable destiny. -The American broker and the peasant-actor -of Oberammergau had been projected toward -each other by an irresistible fate. Behind -each were all the generations of rivalry -and covetousness and savagery and sin that -had sent him forth. Neither was moved by -his own impulse. Each was but an instrument -of the passions of the past. -</p> - -<p> -Lester was not sure whether or not he saw -double—whether or not there were two Bavarians -swinging the butts of their rifles, or -only one. Those who told the story afterward -were in similar doubt. Some declared -for two; some for one only; some saw three -or four in that corner of the trench. In any -case Lester had found his man; and no -emotion he had ever known was half so -sweet as this anguish of pain to get him. -</p> - -<p> -Those who told the story afterward laughed -as they pictured Lester dancing this way -and that to avoid the descending club and -slip his bayonet in under it. He dodged, -they said, as if he were on springs. -Time and time again the Bavarian seemed -about to sweep him with a blow to the other -end of the trench—but no! Lester was -prancing as nimbly as ever, watchful, alert, -his aim always at the heart. No one could -tell how long this went on, for all observation -was crazed. The only thing known for certain -was that in the end Lester got his weapon -in—and in—and in—to the hilt—to the -heart—and that if he had had time to go -through the thick body he would have done it. -</p> - -<p> -He didn't have time, and it was here that -the testimony was in conflict. One man -paid that the Bavarian was able to deal a last -blow with superhuman strength. Another -declared that a second Bavarian dealt it. -Of those who came back some supported one -of these assertions, and some the other; but -there was no difference of opinion at all on -the point that Lester's skull was cracked with -a sound like that of a breaking egg-shell. His -body and his opponent's lay tumbled together -in a fierce embrace—the one with a surprised -horror in the wide-open blue eyes, -while the other—but they only said of Lester -that his face was "all bashed in." -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<h3> -CHAPTER III -</h3> - -<p> -Lester's face was "all bashed in," but -Lester himself didn't know it. The last -thing he remembered was the queer, soft, -mushy feeling as his bayonet pierced the -Bavarian's uniform and entered his body. -His next sensation was that of an emotion, -a confused emotion, of sorrow, pity, or disgust. -</p> - -<p> -At first it seemed all that had survived. -He himself was safe—somewhere—and the -Bavarian had died. He didn't try to move, -or open his eyes, or seek to find out to what -place they had carried him; he was too comfortable -for that. But—a man toward whom -he had no enmity on his own account, who -was also perhaps a husband, with a little wife -waiting for a baby in an apartment with a -kitchenette, that man lay dead, with his, -Lester's, bayonet wound in his heart. He -was sorry. He remembered his hate; he remembered -his passion to kill; he knew it as a -blend of all the vengeances that had been -stirring in his blood since Belgium had been -invaded, and the <i>Lusitania</i> had been sunk, -and the awful things had begun to pile upon -the awful things; but it was a vengeance that -began to seem to him beside the mark. It -was the kind of revenge man didn't know -how to take; the kind of justice he didn't -know how to mete out. The innocent were -being punished for the guilty, as if a child -were hanged because a man had committed -a crime. He couldn't say that he reproached -himself for his part in that; he knew he had -been acting on orders from above; but he -was conscious of a deep regret that the world -should have grown so stupid that such things -had to be. -</p> - -<p> -Otherwise he was resting. He supposed -that he must have been wounded, though he -could feel no pain. Oddly enough, when he -tested himself for pain he didn't know where -to begin. But it was his own immunity, his -sense of well-being and security, that sent -his thought the more persistently toward -the man he had kept from ever returning -home. -</p> - -<p> -Trying to fancy what that home was like, -he found himself, suddenly but naturally, -in a village street, of which the bordering -houses, of plaster and timber, had low roofs -and picturesque eaves. All round there were -mountains. -</p> - -<p> -"This is Oberammergau," he heard in a -language he understood. "Here is my home. -Let us go in." -</p> - -<p> -They entered without the opening of doors, -coming into a room with rafters, small windows, -and an air of antiquity. A woman -was kneeling beside a bed above which hung -a carved wooden crucifix. On each side of -her knelt a quaintly dressed child, with hands -stiffly pressed together. -</p> - -<p> -"That is my wife," said the voice. "Those -are my children. They're praying for me -and asking that I shall come home." -</p> - -<p> -"Should you have liked to go home?" -</p> - -<p> -It seemed natural to Lester to ask this -question. Everything seemed so natural that -he had not yet reached the point of inquiring -how it had come about. The Bavarian reflected. -</p> - -<p> -"I should have liked it before knowing -what this is. I should like it even now, for -their sakes. But since death has to be destroyed -in us one at a time it's better for us -to be here, don't you think?" -</p> - -<p> -Lester began to be startled. "Here? -Where?" -</p> - -<p> -"Wherever it is we are. I don't quite -know where that is. Do you? I'm speaking," -he continued, "in the old terms of place in -the sense of locality, because I don't know -what else to do; but locality, of course, is -gone. We're in the universal, which makes -it difficult for us, after being used to so many -limitations, to understand ourselves." -</p> - -<p> -Lester was aware of fear, awe, and irritation -all struggling in him together. -</p> - -<p> -"You may be in the universal, as you call -it; but—but I've come through." -</p> - -<p> -"We've both come through. The marvel -is that we've done it so easily. It's as I -expected—only more so." -</p> - -<p> -"As you expected—in what way?" -</p> - -<p> -"Every way; all my life. When your barrage -fire began I prayed—" -</p> - -<p> -"Do you fellows <i>pray</i>?" Lester asked, in -astonishment. -</p> - -<p> -"Oh, some of us—what we used to call -prayer—the sort of thing my poor wife and -children are doing now—begging—pleading -that this or that shall be done—instead of -resting in strength, as you and I are." -</p> - -<p> -"I'm not—I'm not—resting in strength." -</p> - -<p> -"Oh yes, you are! You are, without knowing -it. It's what human beings are always -doing. They get every kind of good in their -lives, and don't know the source from which -it comes. You won't know to what your -present actual comfort is due till—" -</p> - -<p> -But the woman rose from her knees, and -so did the children. Wiping away their tears, -they began the preparations for a frugal -breakfast. As Lester felt the presence that -had accompanied him moving from his side -and enveloping all three in tenderness, he -found himself alone with his thought again. -</p> - -<p> -There was no shock to him in the fact that, -as Molly had expressed it, the mortal had put -on immortality; he had faced the possibility -for too long. Ever since the first entraining -he had accepted it as an eventuality of war. -On sailing for France he knew there were -increased chances against his ever coming -home. In the months that followed he grew -accustomed to death and more or less obtuse -to it. He smoked and chaffed is the morning -with fellows who by noon had gone—who -could tell where? They used the euphemism -of "going west"—into the sunset, -into the glory, into the great repose. It was -the easiest thing to say, and many a time he -had said it of himself. "By this time next -year I may have gone west." Then it became: -"By this time next month I may have -gone west." Later it was: "By this time tomorrow—" -"Within an hour—" "Within -half an hour—" "Within ten minutes—" -as the seconds slipped away. -</p> - -<p> -Well, he had gone west! The odd thing -was that he had done it so easily, so painlessly. -The tedious hours in the trenches -faded more or less from recollection. The -going over the top and all that followed after -it became nothing but a blur. Even the -months in camp, in Texas, behind the lines -in France, dissolved like vapors when they -mount into the air. What was present to -him most forcibly was the thought of the -dear ones he had left behind. -</p> - -<p> -His own conditions were entirely a matter -of course; he was perfectly at home in them. -Though he could not have described them, nor -have given an account of them, he knew that -they were pleasant and that they were profoundly -rooted in nature. He was neither -surprised at them nor unduly curious. -</p> - -<p> -Neither was he lonely. His sufficiency -was such that companionship as he had always -conceived of it was not a consideration. -The condition in itself was companionship to -a degree he could not understand. It was vibrant -with life; there was speech in it. Had -he been forced to make explanations, he -would have said there was intelligence in it, -and comprehension. He let himself sink into -the enjoyment of it as a baby rests without -questioning in the love by which it is enlapped. -No; he wasn't lonely; he didn't -know what loneliness was. -</p> - -<p> -But he felt care—the care for Molly, the -fear of the blow that would fall on his father -and mother and sisters. Now that he knew -what had happened, his thought fixed itself -on finding some way by which he could help -them. -</p> - -<p> -On this point he wondered why, if the Bavarian -could return to his home and whisper -something of comfort, he could not return to -his. Distance was not a factor, since it was -no part of the universal. Even the gulf between -the material and the non-material could -in a measure be crossed. Why, then, could -he not cross it? -</p> - -<p> -"Is it because I've been such a bad fellow?" -he asked himself. -</p> - -<p> -"Not entirely," the Bavarian answered, -as if the words had been addressed to him. -"It isn't a question of what we've done so -much as it is of what we know. It's a matter -of thought, of consciousness. When we've -learned that everything exists in a great -mind, that mind itself becomes the medium of -intercourse. Give up the idea that the people -you love live in one sphere and you in -another. We all live together in one great -intelligence that understands all our needs. -Meet your needs not by your own efforts, -but by co-operation with that intelligence, -and what you want will be done." -</p> - -<p> -Lester reflected on that. "What do you -mean by co-operation?" -</p> - -<p> -"Trust, in the first place—till trust becomes -knowledge." -</p> - -<p> -"But if this intelligence knows already -what I need—?" -</p> - -<p> -"It will do the wise thing, only you won't -be associated with it. What you want is the -association, to have your part. You don't -get your part, you don't have the association, -because you isolate yourself. Your mind is -closed to the powers and activities that are -all about you. When you understand what -they are you will have your share in them." -</p> - -<p> -"But why should my mind be closed if -yours is open?" -</p> - -<p> -"It's a matter of habit. We go on here -from the very point at which we left off there. -I had the habit already. Our life at Oberammergau -bred it into one. You didn't -have it. Your thoughts were limited to a -physical world and a physical body and a -physical way of doing everything. Now you -have it all to learn, very much as you had in -your physical childhood." -</p> - -<p> -"Then I'm not being punished for my -sins?" -</p> - -<p> -He asked the question in some uneasiness. -</p> - -<p> -"You are. Don't you see? The punishment -is that you're not more advanced. -You've been like the idle boy in school; and -now you find it hard to catch up. If it were -not for the great thing you've done you'd be -farther behind than you are." -</p> - -<p> -"The great thing I've done? I don't understand -you." -</p> - -<p> -"Every good act helps us onward; and -among things that are good love is the greatest. -Of that you've given the highest proof -there is." -</p> - -<p> -Lester was astounded. -</p> - -<p> -"I?" -</p> - -<p> -"You gave the most precious things you -had—your business, your happiness, your -family, your wife, your life. You held nothing -back. You not only gave without reserve, -but you gave without complaining. -You didn't do it for yourself, but for a great -cause—as men conceive of causes—and you -did it of your own free will." -</p> - -<p> -"And so did you." -</p> - -<p> -"No; I waited to be taken. If I hadn't -been taken I shouldn't have gone. I didn't -offer myself up; I was seized against my will. -You were the more like Jesus of Nazareth, -Who laid down His life for His friends, and so, -as He said Himself, losing your life you have -found it." -</p> - -<p> -"Oh, but I didn't do it in that way at all," -Lester protested. -</p> - -<p> -"It doesn't take anything away from right -that we do it as a matter of course. We -don't have to know the infinite intelligence -to have the infinite intelligence know us. -Isn't it a case of 'He that doeth the Will'? -If we do the Will instinctively we can't -fail of the protection of Him whose Will is -done; and if we don't know Him already we -can be sure He will make Himself known." -</p> - -<p> -Communication once more came to an end, -not abruptly, but by natural cessation, because -the thought had been expressed. -</p> - -<p> -But Lester was left with a clue to follow, -and little by little he followed it. The immediate -gain was a new kind of perception. -It was as if some faculty already possessed, -but paralyzed within him, had been freed. -He could not have said that this endowment -existed in hearing, or sight, or any of the -senses, or in all of them together, or in none -of them. All he could say was that it gave -him a new use of power, of power to which -he had a right, but of which, for a reason that -escaped him, he had hitherto been deprived. -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<h3> -CHAPTER IV -</h3> - -<p> -As with this power there came freedom, -expansion, and growth, he found himself -able to reconstruct out of thought the house -he had formerly called home. -</p> - -<p> -He was back in it all at once—without -effort, without coming from a distance, without -journeying through space, without meeting -the discords between timelessness and -time. He was simply there, walking about -the rooms and halls as he had done ever since -his childhood. -</p> - -<p> -He judged it to be evening, for his father -was at home. It was what he, Lester, had -wanted. His appeal was to be for Molly, -that the family should pity her, should take -her in, should make her one of themselves, -and help her through the time that was ahead -of her. He knew his appearing might be a -shock to them, but it would be a shock to his -father least of all. -</p> - -<p> -The father was seated in the dining-room, -reading a book by an electric lamp. When -the supper was cleared away, he could have -this room to himself. It was a cheerful room, -with deep-red curtains drawn, and a deep-red -cloth on the table. Lester entered without -journeying through space, much as he -had been in the habit of entering all his -life. His sense of presence, of vitality, was -so strong that he wondered his father did not -look up. -</p> - -<p> -"Father!" -</p> - -<p> -But the father kept on reading. -</p> - -<p> -"Father!" -</p> - -<p> -There was no indication that he had been -heard. -</p> - -<p> -He went nearer. He placed himself where -he must be seen. He spoke with more -force. -</p> - -<p> -"Father! I want to talk to you about -Molly." -</p> - -<p> -The father turned a page. Lester could -hear the rattle of the paper. He could hear -the little cough when his father cleared his -throat. He could see the dark shade in his -father's cheeks which showed he needed shaving. -There was nothing about that well-known -face obscure or unfamiliar; but he -could make no sign of his coming that could -be recognized. -</p> - -<p> -Presently Cora came in and sat down. She -began to talk about the book in her father's -hands. To Lester it was like something on -the stage, something done by human beings, -but not part of life's reality. It struck him -for the first time that mortal happenings pass -in a realm of illusion. -</p> - -<p> -From the fact that Cora was in colors he -inferred that the news from France had not -yet reached them. -</p> - -<p> -"Cora," he said, "I want to talk to you -about Molly." -</p> - -<p> -"Oh, it's interesting enough," Cora admitted, -in response to something said by her -father, "especially the first part; but so trivial. -If the dead really do live again I should think -they'd find some better occupation than playing -with a ouija-board." -</p> - -<p> -"A ouija-board," the father argued, -"might be only the simplest means they -can find of getting their messages over." -</p> - -<p> -"Then, since they're so limited in what -they can do, why shouldn't they tell us something -worth our knowing, when they've got -the opportunity? This boy"—she waved -her hand toward the book—"does no more -than describe the same old life on earth—with -variations." -</p> - -<p> -"But perhaps with variations they live the -same old life on earth." -</p> - -<p> -"Then I don't want to believe in it." -Cora's manner was decisive and professional -as such manners are depicted by actresses. -"As a matter of fact," she summed up, "the -more I think, and the more I read, the less -I'm inclined to accept a life beyond the grave -as a possibility. Such books"—again she -indicated that in her father's hand—"express -a natural human yearning, as do also -the myths of the New Testament, but—" -She left her sentence there. The father, too, -left it there, as if at heart he agreed with her. -</p> - -<p> -"I wonder where mother is," Lester asked -himself, and immediately was in her room upstairs. -</p> - -<p> -She was seated before a mirror, trying on a -hat. Another hat was on a chair beside her. -Two bandboxes with a disarray of silver -paper stood beside her on the floor. Ethelind, -short-skirted, and moving with nimble, -sylphlike feet, was standing back to get the -effect. -</p> - -<p> -"I think I like that one the better of the -two," she was saying, "and yet I don't know -but—" -</p> - -<p> -"Oh, they're awful, both of them," the -mother complained. "It's funny I can never -get a hat that suits me but the same old thing." -</p> - -<p> -Lester went forward. He meant that she -should see him first in the mirror. The reflection -would startle her, of course, but he -should be able to reassure her. -</p> - -<p> -It was he who was startled first, since, -standing before the mirror, he didn't get his -own reflection. He felt so solid, so warm, -so full of energy, that it seemed to him impossible -that a reflection should not be cast. -But there was nothing—nothing but the -image of his mother casting her bright eyes -up at the cockatoo crest on a hat that suggested -a Mephistopheles. -</p> - -<p> -"Mother, I want to talk to you about -Molly." -</p> - -<p> -"Oh, dear, what an old hag I'm beginning -to look!" -</p> - -<p> -"Oh no, you're not, mother dear," Ethelind -returned, cheerfully. "That's just worry. -One of these days the war will be over and -he'll be coming back a great general—" -</p> - -<p> -"What's the use of the war being over -and his coming back a great general, when -that creature will have the first say in him?" -</p> - -<p> -Ethelind came behind her mother, to give -the hat a twitch to a more effective angle. -</p> - -<p> -"Mother dear, I don't believe he'd like to -have you talk in that way." -</p> - -<p> -Lester appealed to his sister. -</p> - -<p> -"Ethelind, I want you to help me. I want -you all to think of Molly. I'm not coming -home; but I'm well and happy. That is, I -could be happy if I only knew that she was -being taken care of and that you were good -to her." -</p> - -<p> -But Ethelind only twitched the hat again, -and the subject dropped. As it did a curtain -seemed to come down on the scenes that -had meant home to him, once more suggesting -the action of a play. -</p> - -<p> -There followed for Lester a further phase -of unfolding thought, though with no solution -of some of his perplexities. -</p> - -<p> -"But it's always so," the Bavarian explained -to him. "We can go to them more -easily than they can come to us. The spiritual -can to some slight degree re-embody the -material; but spiritual things are only spiritually -discerned. Jesus of Nazareth after His -Resurrection could at times reincarnate Himself -before His disciples; but they could not -spiritualize themselves so as to follow Him -when He disappeared. That can only be -accomplished in proportion as they lay off -the mortal and temporary by degrees, or -burst out of it with a bound, as you and I -did." -</p> - -<p> -And yet in Lester's consciousness the vibrancy -of life in his surroundings grew more -tense. It was as if he were rising and ever -rising on a mounting wave of vitality, but -always riding on the top. Something like -this energy he had felt in running, or rowing, -or swimming, or on horseback, or in one or -another of the sports in which he had excelled; -but never with this joyousness of -strength. The physical had given some sign -of it, though it had been no more than as the -single note of a shepherd's pipe to the fullness -of an orchestra, or as the tramp of a lone -step to the onrush of a million men. -</p> - -<p> -And in one such swelling, exultant, glorious -moment he came where Molly was in -her little living-room in the apartment with a -kitchenette. She was sitting at a table, with -two or three books before her. One of them -was open and to it from time to time she -dropped her eyes. She raised them soon -again to look straight into the air, as if she -saw beyond walls into the reality where he -was. There was no trouble in her eyes, nor -sorrow, nor anxiety. In every feature there -was peace, with the look of expectation. -</p> - -<p> -He did not try at once to enter into communication -with her. It was enough for -him to study the pure face with its expression -of repose. But he followed her thought as -her eyes fell to the page of the book again. It -was as if he were reading the words himself: -</p> - -<p class="quote"> -"And if Christ be not raised, your faith is vain; ye -are yet in your sins. . . . If in this life only we have -hope in Christ, we are of all men most miserable. But -now is Christ risen from the dead, and become the -first fruits of them that slept. For since by man came -death, by man came also the resurrection of the dead." -</p> - -<p> -She lifted her eyes and reflected on that. -He drew nearer, bending over and about her. -</p> - -<p> -"Molly, I'm here." -</p> - -<p> -He saw her expression brighten. It was -almost as if she had said, "Yes, I know." -</p> - -<p> -"I want you to know, darling, that I'm -not coming home." -</p> - -<p> -Whatever was passing through her mind, -she nodded, though no shade fell on her bright -face. -</p> - -<p> -"I'm well," he continued. "You must -think of me as happy and as taken care of." -</p> - -<p> -Again there was that nod, as if she assented -to something she had heard. Presently she -began to read again: -</p> - -<p class="quote"> -"Then cometh the end, when he shall have delivered -up the kingdom to God, even the Father; when -he shall have put down all rule and all authority and -power. For he must reign, all he hath put all enemies -under his feet. The last enemy that shall be destroyed -is death." -</p> - -<p> -"That enemy is destroyed, Molly. I've -proved it. There's no death; there's nothing -but life. There's not even a shock, or a minute -of unhappiness. There's nothing but -life, and then more life, and then life again. -I was never so alive as I am at this instant, -or so capable of doing things. Except for -you, Molly, sweet one, and the baby that's -coming, and the family, I wouldn't go -back." -</p> - -<p> -If her eyes grew grave it was with thought -and not with foreboding. She returned once -more to her book: -</p> - -<p class="quote"> -"For this corruptible must put on incorruption, and -this mortal must put on immortality. So when this -corruptible shall have put on incorruption and this -mortal shall have put on immortality, then shall be -brought to pass the saying that is written, Death is -swallowed up in victory." -</p> - -<p> -"Yes," he said to her, "that is what has -happened to me. Death has been swallowed -up in victory. If strength and energy and -safety and joy constitute victory, then I'm -victorious. If it were not for you, O my -love—" -</p> - -<p> -But she closed her book suddenly and rose. -As she did so he could hear the words she -uttered, almost aloud. -</p> - -<p> -"I must do that," she said, with determination. -"It's what he'd like. I must take -it on myself." -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /></p> - -<h3> -CHAPTER V -</h3> - -<p> -He lost her for a while, and when he saw -her again she was in the open air. He -was with her, though not exactly by her side. -As far as he could judge he was both leading -her and following after her. He was above -her, and also holding her hand. If he could -have been everywhere about her at one and -the same instant, it was that. -</p> - -<p> -It seemed to be Sunday. There was no -work going on in the streets, and there was the -Sunday air of leisure. Molly walked rapidly, -her eyes toward the ground. Her whole -little figure expressed concentration of purpose. -</p> - -<p> -He knew the suburb. The shady streets, -the trim green lawns, the low stone walls with -vines tumbling over them, the wooden houses -painted for the most part in dull tones of red -and yellow, were those with which he had -always been familiar. High on a knoll he -saw the deep verandas of his own old home. -Molly did not hesitate. She turned in at the -gate. -</p> - -<p> -There was a short driveway, between -clumps of shrubbery and under elms. At a -sudden turning she met Ethelind. The two -girls stopped and looked at each other as they -came face to face. -</p> - -<p> -"You're Ethelind, aren't you?" Molly -said, without trembling or awkwardness. -</p> - -<p> -Ethelind's wild eyes were all ablaze. -</p> - -<p> -"Yes, and you're Molly. I'm—I'm so -glad you've come. I've wanted to know -you. I was coming one day to see you—I -don't care what any one says. I know it's -what my brother would want me to do. We—we -miss him so." -</p> - -<p> -"Thank you," Molly said, with a gentle -smile. "I'm glad you thought of me so -kindly. Just now there's something I want -to say to your father or mother. Do you -think either of them would see me?" -</p> - -<p> -Ethelind's face fell. -</p> - -<p> -"I—I can't say—for sure. They're—Oh, -I don't know!—But my brother—" -</p> - -<p> -"Yes, I know all that; but this is something -important." -</p> - -<p> -The girl seized the sister-in-law's arm. -"It—it isn't—anything you've—you've -heard?" -</p> - -<p> -"It's nothing I've heard; it's only something -that I feel I know." -</p> - -<p> -But they had been seen from the window. -The mother came running out, all her gay -audacity transformed, as a lamp is transformed -when, instead of giving light, it becomes -the center of conflagration. -</p> - -<p> -"Oh, what is it? What is it?" she cried, -as she hurried toward them. -</p> - -<p> -"It's nothing very definite, Mrs. Lester," -Molly replied, calmly. "It's only something -I feel so strongly that—" -</p> - -<p> -"Oh, feel!" Mrs. Lester exclaimed, impatiently. -"Don't frighten us with feelings -when—" -</p> - -<p> -"Is Mr. Lester in? I should like to talk -to him as well." -</p> - -<p> -The mother led the way toward the house. -Molly followed, Ethelind clinging to her arm. -It did not occur to any of them that no -farther explanation had been made as to who -Molly was. That seemed to take itself for -granted. -</p> - -<p> -The father was in the hall at the foot of -the stairs. Cora was coming down them. -Both had been summoned by the sense of -something wrong. Molly went straight to -her husband's father. -</p> - -<p> -"Oh, I want to tell you, Mr. Lester; I -feel I have a message." -</p> - -<p> -"Feel you have a message?" he echoed, -with a kind of tremulous severity. "What -do you mean by that?" -</p> - -<p> -"I don't know what I mean; only this -morning he—he seemed to come and stand -beside me—" -</p> - -<p> -"Nonsense!" It was Cora who said that, -from the position in which she had come to -a standstill half-way down the stairs. To -Molly she seemed very magisterial and commanding. -"Nonsense!" she repeated. "This -is pure nervousness—or hysterics." -</p> - -<p> -"No, it isn't, Miss Lester," Molly contradicted, -not rudely, but with imploring earnestness. -"I'm sure he did come. He spoke to -me. <i>Something</i> spoke to me." -</p> - -<p> -"Did you hear anything?" the mother -demanded. -</p> - -<p> -"No, it wasn't in words; or if it was in -words it was only as it turned itself into -words in my own mind. It was more like—like -a conviction—an intense conviction—that -came to me from outside." -</p> - -<p> -"And what did your conviction say?" -Cora inquired, icily. -</p> - -<p> -"It said— Oh, you must forgive me!—I -shouldn't come if I didn't feel it so strongly!—It's -as hard for me as it is for you—" -</p> - -<p> -The father backed away to the baluster. -His face had grown gray. The mother -dropped to a hall chair. Ethelind was crying -already, but standing by as if to give aid. -Cora was still commanding and severe. It -was she who interrupted. -</p> - -<p> -"Yes; we understand all that. But tell us -what you've come to say." -</p> - -<p> -Under this authority and severity Molly -began to grow nervous. She clasped and unclasped -her hands, sometimes twisting her -fingers. -</p> - -<p> -"You see, it was this way. I was reading -the Bible and—and thinking—and trying to -understand what it meant—-when all at once -he—he seemed to be with me—and to be -saying things." -</p> - -<p> -"What sort of things?" -</p> - -<p> -"I don't exactly know, Miss Lester. I -knew he was there—and that he was telling -me how beautiful it was with him—but I -can't explain how he made me understand -it—" -</p> - -<p> -"No," Cora interrupted again, "nobody -ever can explain. Once they get notions -into their heads, they seem to think explanations -are not important." She came down -to the second lowest step, but still stood over -the trembling young wife in her attitude of -authority. "This is all nerves, my dear—and -excitement. The book you were reading—oh, -yes, it's a very good book, and full -of the wisdom of the ages and all that!—But -it reacted on you in such a way that you've -conjured up these frightening things—" -</p> - -<p> -"But I'm not frightened at all," Molly -burst out. "That's the wonderful part of -it. If he hadn't come and told me beforehand, -and made me feel how happy he is, I -should have been. But I'm not now; and -I don't want you to be. That's why I came." -</p> - -<p> -"Yes; no doubt," Miss Lester agreed, -coldly. "But now that you've come, you'll -do well to run home again and try to calm -yourself and be sensible. If my brother has -been"—she stumbled at the word, but forced -herself to utter it—"if my brother has been—k-killed—we -shall hear of it from the proper -authorities." -</p> - -<p> -"Cora, that's not fair," Ethelind cried, -indignantly. "Molly's come over here to -warn us, and even if she's wrong—" She -broke off to make another sort of appeal. -"Father, can't you say something? Here's -your son's wife—the mother of the child he's -expecting—" -</p> - -<p> -But Mrs. Lester rose, still clinging to her -chair. -</p> - -<p> -"If this is a ruse for getting into our house -and making our acquaintance whether we -would or no—" -</p> - -<p> -"Mother, how can you?" came from Ethelind. -"You deserve that your son should -never be given back to you. Father, can't -you say anything at all?" -</p> - -<p> -But what the father did say was uttered -brokenly. "I don't—I don't believe it. He's -not—not dead. She's come here to get us to -own her—to take her in—" -</p> - -<p> -"And if we don't," Ethelind cried, "and -she goes away again, I'll go with her. Whether -he comes back or not I shall be there." -</p> - -<p> -It was extraordinary to Lester that he -could look on at this scene without conscious -pain. It Was exactly as if he had watched -them rehearsing a play in which emotions -were simulated but not experienced. When -the rehearsal was over they would become -their actual selves again. Beyond hardness, -and suffering, and misunderstanding he could -see the end. -</p> - -<p> -He could see the end as Molly cast an imploring -look around her and prepared to -depart. Ethelind, who was already in street -clothes, gave all the signs of going with her. -Over them both Lester threw the protection -of his love, which apparently gave them -nerve. Neither of them flinched; but it was -in Molly that the real valor shone. She was -both quiet and firm as she took her few steps -toward the door, Ethelind clinging to her -arm. -</p> - -<p> -But at the door there was a ring, and on -the porch outside there stood a boy with a -telegram in his hand. -</p> - -<p> -"Charles E. Lester live here?" -</p> - -<p> -Ethelind seized the envelope, while with -feverish fingers Cora signed for it. The -father took it in his hands and held it helplessly. -</p> - -<p> -The mother uttered one great cry. -</p> - -<p> -"Open it!" -</p> - -<p> -He opened it—read it—and let it flutter to -the floor. -</p> - -<p> -Cora snatched it up; but she, too, dropped -it after a hurried glance. She stood as if -turned to stone. -</p> - -<p> -The mother took it—sat down deliberately—read -it carefully—read it again—read it -again—and folding it, slipped it into the -bosom of her gown. -</p> - -<p> -Molly and Ethelind had not waited. They -had not needed to hear the news. Rather -they were eager to run away. It was Molly, -however, who pressed onward, dragging the -other with her—out to the porch—down the -steps—on to the driveway. -</p> - -<p> -The three in the hallway remained as if -paralyzed, without tears, without words, -seemingly without thoughts. -</p> - -<p> -The mother came first to the possession of -her faculties. -</p> - -<p> -"Stop her," she cried, in a deep, tragic -voice a little like a man's. "Stop her. Bring -her back." She struggled to her feet, hurrying -toward the door. "She's my dead son's -wife. He spoke to her. He's not dead. -He's alive. If he wasn't alive he couldn't -have come to her. Stop her. Call her back. -She's my child. Nothing shall take her away -from me." -</p> - -<p> -Lester saw the two girls pause, while Ethelind -whispered: -</p> - -<p> -"Go back. She's calling you." -</p> - -<p> -Slowly Molly turned round. Slowly she -mounted the steps of the veranda. The -vision faded out as Lester saw his mother's -arms go round the neck of his young wife and -draw her close. -</p> - -<p> -But it faded out in radiance. It also faded -out in confidence. He was not only at peace, -he was at peace with the certainty of a vast -readjustment. -</p> - -<p> -It was readjustment in himself first of all—the -adaptation of the "fan" at ball-games, -and of the broker of The Street, to the eternities -of which he could just discern the -beginnings. -</p> - -<p> -Then it would be the readjustment of his -family—to each other—to Molly—to their -memory of him. A new kind of tenderness -would settle down among them with a new -and farther outlook. -</p> - -<p> -It would be the readjustment, too, of his -country—to a new world-position—to a -wider world responsibility. In the ending of -enmities it would play a ruling part. -</p> - -<p> -And it would be the readjustment of -nations to nations, and of men to men. The -blind hatreds that had hurled him against -the Bavarian and the Bavarian against him -would cease. Their folly would be recognized. -Of the blood that had been shed, and -was still to be shed, this would be the recompense. -It would be shed to its highest purpose -when it should be shown that it had been -shed in vain. -</p> - -<p> -Soon those who were in the turmoil that -mortals create for one another would have -come west like himself—into the sunset, into -the glory, into the great repose. They -would come into the great activities, too, -where work never ceases, and strength never -tires, and love never wanes. And as he -turned into the radiance he felt content to -wait patiently for that. -</p> - -<p><br /><br /></p> - -<p class="t3"> -THE END -</p> - -<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> - - - - - - - - -<pre> - - - - - -End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Going West, by Basil King - -*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK GOING WEST *** - -***** This file should be named 60395-h.htm or 60395-h.zip ***** -This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: - http://www.gutenberg.org/6/0/3/9/60395/ - -Produced by Al Haines & the online Distributed Proofreaders -Canada team at http://www.pgdpcanada.net - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will -be renamed. - -Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright -law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, -so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United -States without permission and without paying copyright -royalties. 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