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| author | Roger Frank <rfrank@pglaf.org> | 2025-10-15 05:15:21 -0700 |
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| committer | Roger Frank <rfrank@pglaf.org> | 2025-10-15 05:15:21 -0700 |
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diff --git a/599-0.txt b/599-0.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..3968562 --- /dev/null +++ b/599-0.txt @@ -0,0 +1,30010 @@ +*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 599 *** + + + + +Vanity Fair + + +by + +William Makepeace Thackeray + + + + +BEFORE THE CURTAIN + +As the manager of the Performance sits before the curtain on the boards +and looks into the Fair, a feeling of profound melancholy comes over +him in his survey of the bustling place. There is a great quantity of +eating and drinking, making love and jilting, laughing and the +contrary, smoking, cheating, fighting, dancing and fiddling; there are +bullies pushing about, bucks ogling the women, knaves picking pockets, +policemen on the look-out, quacks (OTHER quacks, plague take them!) +bawling in front of their booths, and yokels looking up at the +tinselled dancers and poor old rouged tumblers, while the +light-fingered folk are operating upon their pockets behind. Yes, this +is VANITY FAIR; not a moral place certainly; nor a merry one, though +very noisy. Look at the faces of the actors and buffoons when they +come off from their business; and Tom Fool washing the paint off his +cheeks before he sits down to dinner with his wife and the little Jack +Puddings behind the canvas. The curtain will be up presently, and he +will be turning over head and heels, and crying, "How are you?" + +A man with a reflective turn of mind, walking through an exhibition of +this sort, will not be oppressed, I take it, by his own or other +people's hilarity. An episode of humour or kindness touches and +amuses him here and there--a pretty child looking at a gingerbread +stall; a pretty girl blushing whilst her lover talks to her and chooses +her fairing; poor Tom Fool, yonder behind the waggon, mumbling his bone +with the honest family which lives by his tumbling; but the general +impression is one more melancholy than mirthful. When you come home +you sit down in a sober, contemplative, not uncharitable frame of mind, +and apply yourself to your books or your business. + +I have no other moral than this to tag to the present story of "Vanity +Fair." Some people consider Fairs immoral altogether, and eschew such, +with their servants and families: very likely they are right. But +persons who think otherwise, and are of a lazy, or a benevolent, or a +sarcastic mood, may perhaps like to step in for half an hour, and look +at the performances. There are scenes of all sorts; some dreadful +combats, some grand and lofty horse-riding, some scenes of high life, +and some of very middling indeed; some love-making for the sentimental, +and some light comic business; the whole accompanied by appropriate +scenery and brilliantly illuminated with the Author's own candles. + +What more has the Manager of the Performance to say?--To acknowledge +the kindness with which it has been received in all the principal towns +of England through which the Show has passed, and where it has been +most favourably noticed by the respected conductors of the public +Press, and by the Nobility and Gentry. He is proud to think that his +Puppets have given satisfaction to the very best company in this +empire. The famous little Becky Puppet has been pronounced to be +uncommonly flexible in the joints, and lively on the wire; the Amelia +Doll, though it has had a smaller circle of admirers, has yet been +carved and dressed with the greatest care by the artist; the Dobbin +Figure, though apparently clumsy, yet dances in a very amusing and +natural manner; the Little Boys' Dance has been liked by some; and +please to remark the richly dressed figure of the Wicked Nobleman, on +which no expense has been spared, and which Old Nick will fetch away at +the end of this singular performance. + +And with this, and a profound bow to his patrons, the Manager retires, +and the curtain rises. + +LONDON, June 28, 1848 + + + + +CONTENTS + + I Chiswick Mall + II In Which Miss Sharp and Miss Sedley Prepare to Open the + Campaign + III Rebecca Is in Presence of the Enemy + IV The Green Silk Purse + V Dobbin of Ours + VI Vauxhall + VII Crawley of Queen's Crawley + VIII Private and Confidential + IX Family Portraits + X Miss Sharp Begins to Make Friends + XI Arcadian Simplicity + XII Quite a Sentimental Chapter + XIII Sentimental and Otherwise + XIV Miss Crawley at Home + XV In Which Rebecca's Husband Appears for a Short Time + XVI The Letter on the Pincushion + XVII How Captain Dobbin Bought a Piano + XVIII Who Played on the Piano Captain Dobbin Bought + XIX Miss Crawley at Nurse + XX In Which Captain Dobbin Acts as the Messenger of Hymen + XXI A Quarrel About an Heiress + XXII A Marriage and Part of a Honeymoon + XXIII Captain Dobbin Proceeds on His Canvass + XXIV In Which Mr. Osborne Takes Down the Family Bible + XXV In Which All the Principal Personages Think Fit to Leave + Brighton + XXVI Between London and Chatham + XXVII In Which Amelia Joins Her Regiment + XXVIII In Which Amelia Invades the Low Countries + XXIX Brussels + XXX "The Girl I Left Behind Me" + XXXI In Which Jos Sedley Takes Care of His Sister + XXXII In Which Jos Takes Flight, and the War Is Brought to a Close + XXXIII In Which Miss Crawley's Relations Are Very Anxious About Her + XXXIV James Crawley's Pipe Is Put Out + XXXV Widow and Mother + XXXVI How to Live Well on Nothing a Year + XXXVII The Subject Continued + XXXVIII A Family in a Very Small Way + XXXIX A Cynical Chapter + XL In Which Becky Is Recognized by the Family + XLI In Which Becky Revisits the Halls of Her Ancestors + XLII Which Treats of the Osborne Family + XLIII In Which the Reader Has to Double the Cape + XLIV A Round-about Chapter between London and Hampshire + XLV Between Hampshire and London + XLVI Struggles and Trials + XLVII Gaunt House + XLVIII In Which the Reader Is Introduced to the Very Best of Company + XLIX In Which We Enjoy Three Courses and a Dessert + L Contains a Vulgar Incident + LI In Which a Charade Is Acted Which May or May Not Puzzle the + Reader + LII In Which Lord Steyne Shows Himself in a Most Amiable Light + LIII A Rescue and a Catastrophe + LIV Sunday After the Battle + LV In Which the Same Subject is Pursued + LVI Georgy is Made a Gentleman + LVII Eothen + LVIII Our Friend the Major + LIX The Old Piano + LX Returns to the Genteel World + LXI In Which Two Lights are Put Out + LXII Am Rhein + LXIII In Which We Meet an Old Acquaintance + LXIV A Vagabond Chapter + LXV Full of Business and Pleasure + LXVI Amantium Irae + LXVII Which Contains Births, Marriages, and Deaths + + + + +CHAPTER I + +Chiswick Mall + +While the present century was in its teens, and on one sunshiny morning +in June, there drove up to the great iron gate of Miss Pinkerton's +academy for young ladies, on Chiswick Mall, a large family coach, with +two fat horses in blazing harness, driven by a fat coachman in a +three-cornered hat and wig, at the rate of four miles an hour. A black +servant, who reposed on the box beside the fat coachman, uncurled his +bandy legs as soon as the equipage drew up opposite Miss Pinkerton's +shining brass plate, and as he pulled the bell at least a score of +young heads were seen peering out of the narrow windows of the stately +old brick house. Nay, the acute observer might have recognized the +little red nose of good-natured Miss Jemima Pinkerton herself, rising +over some geranium pots in the window of that lady's own drawing-room. + +"It is Mrs. Sedley's coach, sister," said Miss Jemima. "Sambo, the +black servant, has just rung the bell; and the coachman has a new red +waistcoat." + +"Have you completed all the necessary preparations incident to Miss +Sedley's departure, Miss Jemima?" asked Miss Pinkerton herself, that +majestic lady; the Semiramis of Hammersmith, the friend of Doctor +Johnson, the correspondent of Mrs. Chapone herself. + +"The girls were up at four this morning, packing her trunks, sister," +replied Miss Jemima; "we have made her a bow-pot." + +"Say a bouquet, sister Jemima, 'tis more genteel." + +"Well, a booky as big almost as a haystack; I have put up two bottles +of the gillyflower water for Mrs. Sedley, and the receipt for making +it, in Amelia's box." + +"And I trust, Miss Jemima, you have made a copy of Miss Sedley's +account. This is it, is it? Very good--ninety-three pounds, four +shillings. Be kind enough to address it to John Sedley, Esquire, and +to seal this billet which I have written to his lady." + +In Miss Jemima's eyes an autograph letter of her sister, Miss +Pinkerton, was an object of as deep veneration as would have been a +letter from a sovereign. Only when her pupils quitted the +establishment, or when they were about to be married, and once, when +poor Miss Birch died of the scarlet fever, was Miss Pinkerton known to +write personally to the parents of her pupils; and it was Jemima's +opinion that if anything could console Mrs. Birch for her daughter's +loss, it would be that pious and eloquent composition in which Miss +Pinkerton announced the event. + +In the present instance Miss Pinkerton's "billet" was to the following +effect:-- + +The Mall, Chiswick, June 15, 18 + +MADAM,--After her six years' residence at the Mall, I have the honour +and happiness of presenting Miss Amelia Sedley to her parents, as a +young lady not unworthy to occupy a fitting position in their polished +and refined circle. Those virtues which characterize the young English +gentlewoman, those accomplishments which become her birth and station, +will not be found wanting in the amiable Miss Sedley, whose INDUSTRY +and OBEDIENCE have endeared her to her instructors, and whose +delightful sweetness of temper has charmed her AGED and her YOUTHFUL +companions. + +In music, in dancing, in orthography, in every variety of embroidery +and needlework, she will be found to have realized her friends' fondest +wishes. In geography there is still much to be desired; and a careful +and undeviating use of the backboard, for four hours daily during the +next three years, is recommended as necessary to the acquirement of +that dignified DEPORTMENT AND CARRIAGE, so requisite for every young +lady of FASHION. + +In the principles of religion and morality, Miss Sedley will be found +worthy of an establishment which has been honoured by the presence of +THE GREAT LEXICOGRAPHER, and the patronage of the admirable Mrs. +Chapone. In leaving the Mall, Miss Amelia carries with her the hearts +of her companions, and the affectionate regards of her mistress, who +has the honour to subscribe herself, + +Madam, Your most obliged humble servant, BARBARA PINKERTON + +P.S.--Miss Sharp accompanies Miss Sedley. It is particularly requested +that Miss Sharp's stay in Russell Square may not exceed ten days. The +family of distinction with whom she is engaged, desire to avail +themselves of her services as soon as possible. + + +This letter completed, Miss Pinkerton proceeded to write her own name, +and Miss Sedley's, in the fly-leaf of a Johnson's Dictionary--the +interesting work which she invariably presented to her scholars, on +their departure from the Mall. On the cover was inserted a copy of +"Lines addressed to a young lady on quitting Miss Pinkerton's school, +at the Mall; by the late revered Doctor Samuel Johnson." In fact, the +Lexicographer's name was always on the lips of this majestic woman, and +a visit he had paid to her was the cause of her reputation and her +fortune. + +Being commanded by her elder sister to get "the Dictionary" from the +cupboard, Miss Jemima had extracted two copies of the book from the +receptacle in question. When Miss Pinkerton had finished the +inscription in the first, Jemima, with rather a dubious and timid air, +handed her the second. + +"For whom is this, Miss Jemima?" said Miss Pinkerton, with awful +coldness. + +"For Becky Sharp," answered Jemima, trembling very much, and blushing +over her withered face and neck, as she turned her back on her sister. +"For Becky Sharp: she's going too." + +"MISS JEMIMA!" exclaimed Miss Pinkerton, in the largest capitals. "Are +you in your senses? Replace the Dixonary in the closet, and never +venture to take such a liberty in future." + +"Well, sister, it's only two-and-ninepence, and poor Becky will be +miserable if she don't get one." + +"Send Miss Sedley instantly to me," said Miss Pinkerton. And so +venturing not to say another word, poor Jemima trotted off, exceedingly +flurried and nervous. + +Miss Sedley's papa was a merchant in London, and a man of some wealth; +whereas Miss Sharp was an articled pupil, for whom Miss Pinkerton had +done, as she thought, quite enough, without conferring upon her at +parting the high honour of the Dixonary. + +Although schoolmistresses' letters are to be trusted no more nor less +than churchyard epitaphs; yet, as it sometimes happens that a person +departs this life who is really deserving of all the praises the stone +cutter carves over his bones; who IS a good Christian, a good parent, +child, wife, or husband; who actually DOES leave a disconsolate family +to mourn his loss; so in academies of the male and female sex it occurs +every now and then that the pupil is fully worthy of the praises +bestowed by the disinterested instructor. Now, Miss Amelia Sedley was a +young lady of this singular species; and deserved not only all that +Miss Pinkerton said in her praise, but had many charming qualities +which that pompous old Minerva of a woman could not see, from the +differences of rank and age between her pupil and herself. + +For she could not only sing like a lark, or a Mrs. Billington, and +dance like Hillisberg or Parisot; and embroider beautifully; and spell +as well as a Dixonary itself; but she had such a kindly, smiling, +tender, gentle, generous heart of her own, as won the love of everybody +who came near her, from Minerva herself down to the poor girl in the +scullery, and the one-eyed tart-woman's daughter, who was permitted to +vend her wares once a week to the young ladies in the Mall. She had +twelve intimate and bosom friends out of the twenty-four young ladies. +Even envious Miss Briggs never spoke ill of her; high and mighty Miss +Saltire (Lord Dexter's granddaughter) allowed that her figure was +genteel; and as for Miss Swartz, the rich woolly-haired mulatto from +St. Kitt's, on the day Amelia went away, she was in such a passion of +tears that they were obliged to send for Dr. Floss, and half tipsify +her with salvolatile. Miss Pinkerton's attachment was, as may be +supposed from the high position and eminent virtues of that lady, calm +and dignified; but Miss Jemima had already whimpered several times at +the idea of Amelia's departure; and, but for fear of her sister, would +have gone off in downright hysterics, like the heiress (who paid +double) of St. Kitt's. Such luxury of grief, however, is only allowed +to parlour-boarders. Honest Jemima had all the bills, and the washing, +and the mending, and the puddings, and the plate and crockery, and the +servants to superintend. But why speak about her? It is probable that +we shall not hear of her again from this moment to the end of time, and +that when the great filigree iron gates are once closed on her, she and +her awful sister will never issue therefrom into this little world of +history. + +But as we are to see a great deal of Amelia, there is no harm in +saying, at the outset of our acquaintance, that she was a dear little +creature; and a great mercy it is, both in life and in novels, which +(and the latter especially) abound in villains of the most sombre sort, +that we are to have for a constant companion so guileless and +good-natured a person. As she is not a heroine, there is no need to +describe her person; indeed I am afraid that her nose was rather short +than otherwise, and her cheeks a great deal too round and red for a +heroine; but her face blushed with rosy health, and her lips with the +freshest of smiles, and she had a pair of eyes which sparkled with the +brightest and honestest good-humour, except indeed when they filled +with tears, and that was a great deal too often; for the silly thing +would cry over a dead canary-bird; or over a mouse, that the cat haply +had seized upon; or over the end of a novel, were it ever so stupid; +and as for saying an unkind word to her, were any persons hard-hearted +enough to do so--why, so much the worse for them. Even Miss Pinkerton, +that austere and godlike woman, ceased scolding her after the first +time, and though she no more comprehended sensibility than she did +Algebra, gave all masters and teachers particular orders to treat Miss +Sedley with the utmost gentleness, as harsh treatment was injurious to +her. + +So that when the day of departure came, between her two customs of +laughing and crying, Miss Sedley was greatly puzzled how to act. She +was glad to go home, and yet most woefully sad at leaving school. For +three days before, little Laura Martin, the orphan, followed her about +like a little dog. She had to make and receive at least fourteen +presents--to make fourteen solemn promises of writing every week: +"Send my letters under cover to my grandpapa, the Earl of Dexter," said +Miss Saltire (who, by the way, was rather shabby). "Never mind the +postage, but write every day, you dear darling," said the impetuous and +woolly-headed, but generous and affectionate Miss Swartz; and the +orphan little Laura Martin (who was just in round-hand), took her +friend's hand and said, looking up in her face wistfully, "Amelia, when +I write to you I shall call you Mamma." All which details, I have no +doubt, JONES, who reads this book at his Club, will pronounce to be +excessively foolish, trivial, twaddling, and ultra-sentimental. Yes; I +can see Jones at this minute (rather flushed with his joint of mutton +and half pint of wine), taking out his pencil and scoring under the +words "foolish, twaddling," &c., and adding to them his own remark of +"QUITE TRUE." Well, he is a lofty man of genius, and admires the great +and heroic in life and novels; and so had better take warning and go +elsewhere. + +Well, then. The flowers, and the presents, and the trunks, and +bonnet-boxes of Miss Sedley having been arranged by Mr. Sambo in the +carriage, together with a very small and weather-beaten old cow's-skin +trunk with Miss Sharp's card neatly nailed upon it, which was delivered +by Sambo with a grin, and packed by the coachman with a corresponding +sneer--the hour for parting came; and the grief of that moment was +considerably lessened by the admirable discourse which Miss Pinkerton +addressed to her pupil. Not that the parting speech caused Amelia to +philosophise, or that it armed her in any way with a calmness, the +result of argument; but it was intolerably dull, pompous, and tedious; +and having the fear of her schoolmistress greatly before her eyes, Miss +Sedley did not venture, in her presence, to give way to any ebullitions +of private grief. A seed-cake and a bottle of wine were produced in +the drawing-room, as on the solemn occasions of the visits of parents, +and these refreshments being partaken of, Miss Sedley was at liberty to +depart. + +"You'll go in and say good-by to Miss Pinkerton, Becky!" said Miss +Jemima to a young lady of whom nobody took any notice, and who was +coming downstairs with her own bandbox. + +"I suppose I must," said Miss Sharp calmly, and much to the wonder of +Miss Jemima; and the latter having knocked at the door, and receiving +permission to come in, Miss Sharp advanced in a very unconcerned +manner, and said in French, and with a perfect accent, "Mademoiselle, +je viens vous faire mes adieux." + +Miss Pinkerton did not understand French; she only directed those who +did: but biting her lips and throwing up her venerable and Roman-nosed +head (on the top of which figured a large and solemn turban), she said, +"Miss Sharp, I wish you a good morning." As the Hammersmith Semiramis +spoke, she waved one hand, both by way of adieu, and to give Miss Sharp +an opportunity of shaking one of the fingers of the hand which was left +out for that purpose. + +Miss Sharp only folded her own hands with a very frigid smile and bow, +and quite declined to accept the proffered honour; on which Semiramis +tossed up her turban more indignantly than ever. In fact, it was a +little battle between the young lady and the old one, and the latter +was worsted. "Heaven bless you, my child," said she, embracing Amelia, +and scowling the while over the girl's shoulder at Miss Sharp. "Come +away, Becky," said Miss Jemima, pulling the young woman away in great +alarm, and the drawing-room door closed upon them for ever. + +Then came the struggle and parting below. Words refuse to tell it. All +the servants were there in the hall--all the dear friends--all the young +ladies--the dancing-master who had just arrived; and there was such a +scuffling, and hugging, and kissing, and crying, with the hysterical +YOOPS of Miss Swartz, the parlour-boarder, from her room, as no pen can +depict, and as the tender heart would fain pass over. The embracing was +over; they parted--that is, Miss Sedley parted from her friends. Miss +Sharp had demurely entered the carriage some minutes before. Nobody +cried for leaving HER. + +Sambo of the bandy legs slammed the carriage door on his young weeping +mistress. He sprang up behind the carriage. "Stop!" cried Miss +Jemima, rushing to the gate with a parcel. + +"It's some sandwiches, my dear," said she to Amelia. "You may be +hungry, you know; and Becky, Becky Sharp, here's a book for you that my +sister--that is, I--Johnson's Dixonary, you know; you mustn't leave us +without that. Good-by. Drive on, coachman. God bless you!" + +And the kind creature retreated into the garden, overcome with emotion. + +But, lo! and just as the coach drove off, Miss Sharp put her pale face +out of the window and actually flung the book back into the garden. + +This almost caused Jemima to faint with terror. "Well, I never"--said +she--"what an audacious"--Emotion prevented her from completing either +sentence. The carriage rolled away; the great gates were closed; the +bell rang for the dancing lesson. The world is before the two young +ladies; and so, farewell to Chiswick Mall. + + + +CHAPTER II + +In Which Miss Sharp and Miss Sedley Prepare to Open the Campaign + +When Miss Sharp had performed the heroical act mentioned in the last +chapter, and had seen the Dixonary, flying over the pavement of the +little garden, fall at length at the feet of the astonished Miss +Jemima, the young lady's countenance, which had before worn an almost +livid look of hatred, assumed a smile that perhaps was scarcely more +agreeable, and she sank back in the carriage in an easy frame of mind, +saying--"So much for the Dixonary; and, thank God, I'm out of Chiswick." + +Miss Sedley was almost as flurried at the act of defiance as Miss +Jemima had been; for, consider, it was but one minute that she had left +school, and the impressions of six years are not got over in that space +of time. Nay, with some persons those awes and terrors of youth last +for ever and ever. I know, for instance, an old gentleman of +sixty-eight, who said to me one morning at breakfast, with a very +agitated countenance, "I dreamed last night that I was flogged by Dr. +Raine." Fancy had carried him back five-and-fifty years in the course +of that evening. Dr. Raine and his rod were just as awful to him in +his heart, then, at sixty-eight, as they had been at thirteen. If the +Doctor, with a large birch, had appeared bodily to him, even at the age +of threescore and eight, and had said in awful voice, "Boy, take down +your pant--"? Well, well, Miss Sedley was exceedingly alarmed at this +act of insubordination. + +"How could you do so, Rebecca?" at last she said, after a pause. + +"Why, do you think Miss Pinkerton will come out and order me back to +the black-hole?" said Rebecca, laughing. + +"No: but--" + +"I hate the whole house," continued Miss Sharp in a fury. "I hope I +may never set eyes on it again. I wish it were in the bottom of the +Thames, I do; and if Miss Pinkerton were there, I wouldn't pick her +out, that I wouldn't. O how I should like to see her floating in the +water yonder, turban and all, with her train streaming after her, and +her nose like the beak of a wherry." + +"Hush!" cried Miss Sedley. + +"Why, will the black footman tell tales?" cried Miss Rebecca, laughing. +"He may go back and tell Miss Pinkerton that I hate her with all my +soul; and I wish he would; and I wish I had a means of proving it, too. +For two years I have only had insults and outrage from her. I have been +treated worse than any servant in the kitchen. I have never had a +friend or a kind word, except from you. I have been made to tend the +little girls in the lower schoolroom, and to talk French to the Misses, +until I grew sick of my mother tongue. But that talking French to Miss +Pinkerton was capital fun, wasn't it? She doesn't know a word of +French, and was too proud to confess it. I believe it was that which +made her part with me; and so thank Heaven for French. Vive la France! +Vive l'Empereur! Vive Bonaparte!" + +"O Rebecca, Rebecca, for shame!" cried Miss Sedley; for this was the +greatest blasphemy Rebecca had as yet uttered; and in those days, in +England, to say, "Long live Bonaparte!" was as much as to say, "Long +live Lucifer!" "How can you--how dare you have such wicked, revengeful +thoughts?" + +"Revenge may be wicked, but it's natural," answered Miss Rebecca. "I'm +no angel." And, to say the truth, she certainly was not. + +For it may be remarked in the course of this little conversation (which +took place as the coach rolled along lazily by the river side) that +though Miss Rebecca Sharp has twice had occasion to thank Heaven, it +has been, in the first place, for ridding her of some person whom she +hated, and secondly, for enabling her to bring her enemies to some sort +of perplexity or confusion; neither of which are very amiable motives +for religious gratitude, or such as would be put forward by persons of +a kind and placable disposition. Miss Rebecca was not, then, in the +least kind or placable. All the world used her ill, said this young +misanthropist, and we may be pretty certain that persons whom all the +world treats ill, deserve entirely the treatment they get. The world +is a looking-glass, and gives back to every man the reflection of his +own face. Frown at it, and it will in turn look sourly upon you; laugh +at it and with it, and it is a jolly kind companion; and so let all +young persons take their choice. This is certain, that if the world +neglected Miss Sharp, she never was known to have done a good action in +behalf of anybody; nor can it be expected that twenty-four young ladies +should all be as amiable as the heroine of this work, Miss Sedley (whom +we have selected for the very reason that she was the best-natured of +all, otherwise what on earth was to have prevented us from putting up +Miss Swartz, or Miss Crump, or Miss Hopkins, as heroine in her place!) +it could not be expected that every one should be of the humble and +gentle temper of Miss Amelia Sedley; should take every opportunity to +vanquish Rebecca's hard-heartedness and ill-humour; and, by a thousand +kind words and offices, overcome, for once at least, her hostility to +her kind. + +Miss Sharp's father was an artist, and in that quality had given +lessons of drawing at Miss Pinkerton's school. He was a clever man; a +pleasant companion; a careless student; with a great propensity for +running into debt, and a partiality for the tavern. When he was drunk, +he used to beat his wife and daughter; and the next morning, with a +headache, he would rail at the world for its neglect of his genius, and +abuse, with a good deal of cleverness, and sometimes with perfect +reason, the fools, his brother painters. As it was with the utmost +difficulty that he could keep himself, and as he owed money for a mile +round Soho, where he lived, he thought to better his circumstances by +marrying a young woman of the French nation, who was by profession an +opera-girl. The humble calling of her female parent Miss Sharp never +alluded to, but used to state subsequently that the Entrechats were a +noble family of Gascony, and took great pride in her descent from them. +And curious it is that as she advanced in life this young lady's +ancestors increased in rank and splendour. + +Rebecca's mother had had some education somewhere, and her daughter +spoke French with purity and a Parisian accent. It was in those days +rather a rare accomplishment, and led to her engagement with the +orthodox Miss Pinkerton. For her mother being dead, her father, +finding himself not likely to recover, after his third attack of +delirium tremens, wrote a manly and pathetic letter to Miss Pinkerton, +recommending the orphan child to her protection, and so descended to +the grave, after two bailiffs had quarrelled over his corpse. Rebecca +was seventeen when she came to Chiswick, and was bound over as an +articled pupil; her duties being to talk French, as we have seen; and +her privileges to live cost free, and, with a few guineas a year, to +gather scraps of knowledge from the professors who attended the school. + +She was small and slight in person; pale, sandy-haired, and with eyes +habitually cast down: when they looked up they were very large, odd, +and attractive; so attractive that the Reverend Mr. Crisp, fresh from +Oxford, and curate to the Vicar of Chiswick, the Reverend Mr. +Flowerdew, fell in love with Miss Sharp; being shot dead by a glance of +her eyes which was fired all the way across Chiswick Church from the +school-pew to the reading-desk. This infatuated young man used +sometimes to take tea with Miss Pinkerton, to whom he had been +presented by his mamma, and actually proposed something like marriage +in an intercepted note, which the one-eyed apple-woman was charged to +deliver. Mrs. Crisp was summoned from Buxton, and abruptly carried off +her darling boy; but the idea, even, of such an eagle in the Chiswick +dovecot caused a great flutter in the breast of Miss Pinkerton, who +would have sent away Miss Sharp but that she was bound to her under a +forfeit, and who never could thoroughly believe the young lady's +protestations that she had never exchanged a single word with Mr. +Crisp, except under her own eyes on the two occasions when she had met +him at tea. + +By the side of many tall and bouncing young ladies in the +establishment, Rebecca Sharp looked like a child. But she had the +dismal precocity of poverty. Many a dun had she talked to, and turned +away from her father's door; many a tradesman had she coaxed and +wheedled into good-humour, and into the granting of one meal more. She +sate commonly with her father, who was very proud of her wit, and heard +the talk of many of his wild companions--often but ill-suited for a +girl to hear. But she never had been a girl, she said; she had been a +woman since she was eight years old. Oh, why did Miss Pinkerton let +such a dangerous bird into her cage? + +The fact is, the old lady believed Rebecca to be the meekest creature +in the world, so admirably, on the occasions when her father brought +her to Chiswick, used Rebecca to perform the part of the ingenue; and +only a year before the arrangement by which Rebecca had been admitted +into her house, and when Rebecca was sixteen years old, Miss Pinkerton +majestically, and with a little speech, made her a present of a +doll--which was, by the way, the confiscated property of Miss Swindle, +discovered surreptitiously nursing it in school-hours. How the father +and daughter laughed as they trudged home together after the evening +party (it was on the occasion of the speeches, when all the professors +were invited) and how Miss Pinkerton would have raged had she seen the +caricature of herself which the little mimic, Rebecca, managed to make +out of her doll. Becky used to go through dialogues with it; it formed +the delight of Newman Street, Gerrard Street, and the Artists' quarter: +and the young painters, when they came to take their gin-and-water with +their lazy, dissolute, clever, jovial senior, used regularly to ask +Rebecca if Miss Pinkerton was at home: she was as well known to them, +poor soul! as Mr. Lawrence or President West. Once Rebecca had the +honour to pass a few days at Chiswick; after which she brought back +Jemima, and erected another doll as Miss Jemmy: for though that honest +creature had made and given her jelly and cake enough for three +children, and a seven-shilling piece at parting, the girl's sense of +ridicule was far stronger than her gratitude, and she sacrificed Miss +Jemmy quite as pitilessly as her sister. + +The catastrophe came, and she was brought to the Mall as to her home. +The rigid formality of the place suffocated her: the prayers and the +meals, the lessons and the walks, which were arranged with a conventual +regularity, oppressed her almost beyond endurance; and she looked back +to the freedom and the beggary of the old studio in Soho with so much +regret, that everybody, herself included, fancied she was consumed with +grief for her father. She had a little room in the garret, where the +maids heard her walking and sobbing at night; but it was with rage, and +not with grief. She had not been much of a dissembler, until now her +loneliness taught her to feign. She had never mingled in the society of +women: her father, reprobate as he was, was a man of talent; his +conversation was a thousand times more agreeable to her than the talk +of such of her own sex as she now encountered. The pompous vanity of +the old schoolmistress, the foolish good-humour of her sister, the +silly chat and scandal of the elder girls, and the frigid correctness +of the governesses equally annoyed her; and she had no soft maternal +heart, this unlucky girl, otherwise the prattle and talk of the younger +children, with whose care she was chiefly intrusted, might have soothed +and interested her; but she lived among them two years, and not one was +sorry that she went away. The gentle tender-hearted Amelia Sedley was +the only person to whom she could attach herself in the least; and who +could help attaching herself to Amelia? + +The happiness--the superior advantages of the young women round about +her, gave Rebecca inexpressible pangs of envy. "What airs that girl +gives herself, because she is an Earl's grand-daughter," she said of +one. "How they cringe and bow to that Creole, because of her hundred +thousand pounds! I am a thousand times cleverer and more charming than +that creature, for all her wealth. I am as well bred as the Earl's +grand-daughter, for all her fine pedigree; and yet every one passes me +by here. And yet, when I was at my father's, did not the men give up +their gayest balls and parties in order to pass the evening with me?" +She determined at any rate to get free from the prison in which she +found herself, and now began to act for herself, and for the first time +to make connected plans for the future. + +She took advantage, therefore, of the means of study the place offered +her; and as she was already a musician and a good linguist, she +speedily went through the little course of study which was considered +necessary for ladies in those days. Her music she practised +incessantly, and one day, when the girls were out, and she had remained +at home, she was overheard to play a piece so well that Minerva +thought, wisely, she could spare herself the expense of a master for +the juniors, and intimated to Miss Sharp that she was to instruct them +in music for the future. + +The girl refused; and for the first time, and to the astonishment of +the majestic mistress of the school. "I am here to speak French with +the children," Rebecca said abruptly, "not to teach them music, and +save money for you. Give me money, and I will teach them." + +Minerva was obliged to yield, and, of course, disliked her from that +day. "For five-and-thirty years," she said, and with great justice, "I +never have seen the individual who has dared in my own house to +question my authority. I have nourished a viper in my bosom." + +"A viper--a fiddlestick," said Miss Sharp to the old lady, almost +fainting with astonishment. "You took me because I was useful. There +is no question of gratitude between us. I hate this place, and want to +leave it. I will do nothing here but what I am obliged to do." + +It was in vain that the old lady asked her if she was aware she was +speaking to Miss Pinkerton? Rebecca laughed in her face, with a horrid +sarcastic demoniacal laughter, that almost sent the schoolmistress into +fits. "Give me a sum of money," said the girl, "and get rid of me--or, +if you like better, get me a good place as governess in a nobleman's +family--you can do so if you please." And in their further disputes +she always returned to this point, "Get me a situation--we hate each +other, and I am ready to go." + +Worthy Miss Pinkerton, although she had a Roman nose and a turban, and +was as tall as a grenadier, and had been up to this time an +irresistible princess, had no will or strength like that of her little +apprentice, and in vain did battle against her, and tried to overawe +her. Attempting once to scold her in public, Rebecca hit upon the +before-mentioned plan of answering her in French, which quite routed +the old woman. In order to maintain authority in her school, it became +necessary to remove this rebel, this monster, this serpent, this +firebrand; and hearing about this time that Sir Pitt Crawley's family +was in want of a governess, she actually recommended Miss Sharp for the +situation, firebrand and serpent as she was. "I cannot, certainly," +she said, "find fault with Miss Sharp's conduct, except to myself; and +must allow that her talents and accomplishments are of a high order. As +far as the head goes, at least, she does credit to the educational +system pursued at my establishment." + +And so the schoolmistress reconciled the recommendation to her +conscience, and the indentures were cancelled, and the apprentice was +free. The battle here described in a few lines, of course, lasted for +some months. And as Miss Sedley, being now in her seventeenth year, +was about to leave school, and had a friendship for Miss Sharp ("'tis +the only point in Amelia's behaviour," said Minerva, "which has not +been satisfactory to her mistress"), Miss Sharp was invited by her +friend to pass a week with her at home, before she entered upon her +duties as governess in a private family. + +Thus the world began for these two young ladies. For Amelia it was +quite a new, fresh, brilliant world, with all the bloom upon it. It +was not quite a new one for Rebecca--(indeed, if the truth must be told +with respect to the Crisp affair, the tart-woman hinted to somebody, +who took an affidavit of the fact to somebody else, that there was a +great deal more than was made public regarding Mr. Crisp and Miss +Sharp, and that his letter was in answer to another letter). But who +can tell you the real truth of the matter? At all events, if Rebecca +was not beginning the world, she was beginning it over again. + +By the time the young ladies reached Kensington turnpike, Amelia had +not forgotten her companions, but had dried her tears, and had blushed +very much and been delighted at a young officer of the Life Guards, who +spied her as he was riding by, and said, "A dem fine gal, egad!" and +before the carriage arrived in Russell Square, a great deal of +conversation had taken place about the Drawing-room, and whether or not +young ladies wore powder as well as hoops when presented, and whether +she was to have that honour: to the Lord Mayor's ball she knew she was +to go. And when at length home was reached, Miss Amelia Sedley skipped +out on Sambo's arm, as happy and as handsome a girl as any in the whole +big city of London. Both he and coachman agreed on this point, and so +did her father and mother, and so did every one of the servants in the +house, as they stood bobbing, and curtseying, and smiling, in the hall +to welcome their young mistress. + +You may be sure that she showed Rebecca over every room of the house, +and everything in every one of her drawers; and her books, and her +piano, and her dresses, and all her necklaces, brooches, laces, and +gimcracks. She insisted upon Rebecca accepting the white cornelian and +the turquoise rings, and a sweet sprigged muslin, which was too small +for her now, though it would fit her friend to a nicety; and she +determined in her heart to ask her mother's permission to present her +white Cashmere shawl to her friend. Could she not spare it? and had +not her brother Joseph just brought her two from India? + +When Rebecca saw the two magnificent Cashmere shawls which Joseph +Sedley had brought home to his sister, she said, with perfect truth, +"that it must be delightful to have a brother," and easily got the pity +of the tender-hearted Amelia for being alone in the world, an orphan +without friends or kindred. + +"Not alone," said Amelia; "you know, Rebecca, I shall always be your +friend, and love you as a sister--indeed I will." + +"Ah, but to have parents, as you have--kind, rich, affectionate +parents, who give you everything you ask for; and their love, which is +more precious than all! My poor papa could give me nothing, and I had +but two frocks in all the world! And then, to have a brother, a dear +brother! Oh, how you must love him!" + +Amelia laughed. + +"What! don't you love him? you, who say you love everybody?" + +"Yes, of course, I do--only--" + +"Only what?" + +"Only Joseph doesn't seem to care much whether I love him or not. He +gave me two fingers to shake when he arrived after ten years' absence! +He is very kind and good, but he scarcely ever speaks to me; I think he +loves his pipe a great deal better than his"--but here Amelia checked +herself, for why should she speak ill of her brother? "He was very kind +to me as a child," she added; "I was but five years old when he went +away." + +"Isn't he very rich?" said Rebecca. "They say all Indian nabobs are +enormously rich." + +"I believe he has a very large income." + +"And is your sister-in-law a nice pretty woman?" + +"La! Joseph is not married," said Amelia, laughing again. + +Perhaps she had mentioned the fact already to Rebecca, but that young +lady did not appear to have remembered it; indeed, vowed and protested +that she expected to see a number of Amelia's nephews and nieces. She +was quite disappointed that Mr. Sedley was not married; she was sure +Amelia had said he was, and she doted so on little children. + +"I think you must have had enough of them at Chiswick," said Amelia, +rather wondering at the sudden tenderness on her friend's part; and +indeed in later days Miss Sharp would never have committed herself so +far as to advance opinions, the untruth of which would have been so +easily detected. But we must remember that she is but nineteen as yet, +unused to the art of deceiving, poor innocent creature! and making her +own experience in her own person. The meaning of the above series of +queries, as translated in the heart of this ingenious young woman, was +simply this: "If Mr. Joseph Sedley is rich and unmarried, why should I +not marry him? I have only a fortnight, to be sure, but there is no +harm in trying." And she determined within herself to make this +laudable attempt. She redoubled her caresses to Amelia; she kissed the +white cornelian necklace as she put it on; and vowed she would never, +never part with it. When the dinner-bell rang she went downstairs with +her arm round her friend's waist, as is the habit of young ladies. She +was so agitated at the drawing-room door, that she could hardly find +courage to enter. "Feel my heart, how it beats, dear!" said she to her +friend. + +"No, it doesn't," said Amelia. "Come in, don't be frightened. Papa +won't do you any harm." + + + +CHAPTER III + +Rebecca Is in Presence of the Enemy + +A VERY stout, puffy man, in buckskins and Hessian boots, with several +immense neckcloths that rose almost to his nose, with a red striped +waistcoat and an apple green coat with steel buttons almost as large as +crown pieces (it was the morning costume of a dandy or blood of those +days) was reading the paper by the fire when the two girls entered, and +bounced off his arm-chair, and blushed excessively, and hid his entire +face almost in his neckcloths at this apparition. + +"It's only your sister, Joseph," said Amelia, laughing and shaking the +two fingers which he held out. "I've come home FOR GOOD, you know; and +this is my friend, Miss Sharp, whom you have heard me mention." + +"No, never, upon my word," said the head under the neckcloth, shaking +very much--"that is, yes--what abominably cold weather, Miss"--and +herewith he fell to poking the fire with all his might, although it was +in the middle of June. + +"He's very handsome," whispered Rebecca to Amelia, rather loud. + +"Do you think so?" said the latter. "I'll tell him." + +"Darling! not for worlds," said Miss Sharp, starting back as timid as a +fawn. She had previously made a respectful virgin-like curtsey to the +gentleman, and her modest eyes gazed so perseveringly on the carpet +that it was a wonder how she should have found an opportunity to see +him. + +"Thank you for the beautiful shawls, brother," said Amelia to the fire +poker. "Are they not beautiful, Rebecca?" + +"O heavenly!" said Miss Sharp, and her eyes went from the carpet +straight to the chandelier. + +Joseph still continued a huge clattering at the poker and tongs, +puffing and blowing the while, and turning as red as his yellow face +would allow him. "I can't make you such handsome presents, Joseph," +continued his sister, "but while I was at school, I have embroidered +for you a very beautiful pair of braces." + +"Good Gad! Amelia," cried the brother, in serious alarm, "what do you +mean?" and plunging with all his might at the bell-rope, that article +of furniture came away in his hand, and increased the honest fellow's +confusion. "For heaven's sake see if my buggy's at the door. I CAN'T +wait. I must go. D---- that groom of mine. I must go." + +At this minute the father of the family walked in, rattling his seals +like a true British merchant. "What's the matter, Emmy?" says he. + +"Joseph wants me to see if his--his buggy is at the door. What is a +buggy, Papa?" + +"It is a one-horse palanquin," said the old gentleman, who was a wag in +his way. + +Joseph at this burst out into a wild fit of laughter; in which, +encountering the eye of Miss Sharp, he stopped all of a sudden, as if +he had been shot. + +"This young lady is your friend? Miss Sharp, I am very happy to see +you. Have you and Emmy been quarrelling already with Joseph, that he +wants to be off?" + +"I promised Bonamy of our service, sir," said Joseph, "to dine with +him." + +"O fie! didn't you tell your mother you would dine here?" + +"But in this dress it's impossible." + +"Look at him, isn't he handsome enough to dine anywhere, Miss Sharp?" + +On which, of course, Miss Sharp looked at her friend, and they both set +off in a fit of laughter, highly agreeable to the old gentleman. + +"Did you ever see a pair of buckskins like those at Miss Pinkerton's?" +continued he, following up his advantage. + +"Gracious heavens! Father," cried Joseph. + +"There now, I have hurt his feelings. Mrs. Sedley, my dear, I have +hurt your son's feelings. I have alluded to his buckskins. Ask Miss +Sharp if I haven't? Come, Joseph, be friends with Miss Sharp, and let +us all go to dinner." + +"There's a pillau, Joseph, just as you like it, and Papa has brought +home the best turbot in Billingsgate." + +"Come, come, sir, walk downstairs with Miss Sharp, and I will follow +with these two young women," said the father, and he took an arm of +wife and daughter and walked merrily off. + +If Miss Rebecca Sharp had determined in her heart upon making the +conquest of this big beau, I don't think, ladies, we have any right to +blame her; for though the task of husband-hunting is generally, and +with becoming modesty, entrusted by young persons to their mammas, +recollect that Miss Sharp had no kind parent to arrange these delicate +matters for her, and that if she did not get a husband for herself, +there was no one else in the wide world who would take the trouble off +her hands. What causes young people to "come out," but the noble +ambition of matrimony? What sends them trooping to watering-places? +What keeps them dancing till five o'clock in the morning through a +whole mortal season? What causes them to labour at pianoforte sonatas, +and to learn four songs from a fashionable master at a guinea a lesson, +and to play the harp if they have handsome arms and neat elbows, and to +wear Lincoln Green toxophilite hats and feathers, but that they may +bring down some "desirable" young man with those killing bows and +arrows of theirs? What causes respectable parents to take up their +carpets, set their houses topsy-turvy, and spend a fifth of their +year's income in ball suppers and iced champagne? Is it sheer love of +their species, and an unadulterated wish to see young people happy and +dancing? Psha! they want to marry their daughters; and, as honest Mrs. +Sedley has, in the depths of her kind heart, already arranged a score +of little schemes for the settlement of her Amelia, so also had our +beloved but unprotected Rebecca determined to do her very best to +secure the husband, who was even more necessary for her than for her +friend. She had a vivid imagination; she had, besides, read the Arabian +Nights and Guthrie's Geography; and it is a fact that while she was +dressing for dinner, and after she had asked Amelia whether her brother +was very rich, she had built for herself a most magnificent castle in +the air, of which she was mistress, with a husband somewhere in the +background (she had not seen him as yet, and his figure would not +therefore be very distinct); she had arrayed herself in an infinity of +shawls, turbans, and diamond necklaces, and had mounted upon an +elephant to the sound of the march in Bluebeard, in order to pay a +visit of ceremony to the Grand Mogul. Charming Alnaschar visions! it is +the happy privilege of youth to construct you, and many a fanciful +young creature besides Rebecca Sharp has indulged in these delightful +day-dreams ere now! + +Joseph Sedley was twelve years older than his sister Amelia. He was in +the East India Company's Civil Service, and his name appeared, at the +period of which we write, in the Bengal division of the East India +Register, as collector of Boggley Wollah, an honourable and lucrative +post, as everybody knows: in order to know to what higher posts Joseph +rose in the service, the reader is referred to the same periodical. + +Boggley Wollah is situated in a fine, lonely, marshy, jungly district, +famous for snipe-shooting, and where not unfrequently you may flush a +tiger. Ramgunge, where there is a magistrate, is only forty miles off, +and there is a cavalry station about thirty miles farther; so Joseph +wrote home to his parents, when he took possession of his +collectorship. He had lived for about eight years of his life, quite +alone, at this charming place, scarcely seeing a Christian face except +twice a year, when the detachment arrived to carry off the revenues +which he had collected, to Calcutta. + +Luckily, at this time he caught a liver complaint, for the cure of +which he returned to Europe, and which was the source of great comfort +and amusement to him in his native country. He did not live with his +family while in London, but had lodgings of his own, like a gay young +bachelor. Before he went to India he was too young to partake of the +delightful pleasures of a man about town, and plunged into them on his +return with considerable assiduity. He drove his horses in the Park; +he dined at the fashionable taverns (for the Oriental Club was not as +yet invented); he frequented the theatres, as the mode was in those +days, or made his appearance at the opera, laboriously attired in +tights and a cocked hat. + +On returning to India, and ever after, he used to talk of the pleasure +of this period of his existence with great enthusiasm, and give you to +understand that he and Brummel were the leading bucks of the day. But +he was as lonely here as in his jungle at Boggley Wollah. He scarcely +knew a single soul in the metropolis: and were it not for his doctor, +and the society of his blue-pill, and his liver complaint, he must have +died of loneliness. He was lazy, peevish, and a bon-vivant; the +appearance of a lady frightened him beyond measure; hence it was but +seldom that he joined the paternal circle in Russell Square, where +there was plenty of gaiety, and where the jokes of his good-natured old +father frightened his amour-propre. His bulk caused Joseph much +anxious thought and alarm; now and then he would make a desperate +attempt to get rid of his superabundant fat; but his indolence and love +of good living speedily got the better of these endeavours at reform, +and he found himself again at his three meals a day. He never was well +dressed; but he took the hugest pains to adorn his big person, and +passed many hours daily in that occupation. His valet made a fortune +out of his wardrobe: his toilet-table was covered with as many pomatums +and essences as ever were employed by an old beauty: he had tried, in +order to give himself a waist, every girth, stay, and waistband then +invented. Like most fat men, he would have his clothes made too tight, +and took care they should be of the most brilliant colours and youthful +cut. When dressed at length, in the afternoon, he would issue forth to +take a drive with nobody in the Park; and then would come back in order +to dress again and go and dine with nobody at the Piazza Coffee-House. +He was as vain as a girl; and perhaps his extreme shyness was one of +the results of his extreme vanity. If Miss Rebecca can get the better +of him, and at her first entrance into life, she is a young person of +no ordinary cleverness. + +The first move showed considerable skill. When she called Sedley a +very handsome man, she knew that Amelia would tell her mother, who +would probably tell Joseph, or who, at any rate, would be pleased by +the compliment paid to her son. All mothers are. If you had told +Sycorax that her son Caliban was as handsome as Apollo, she would have +been pleased, witch as she was. Perhaps, too, Joseph Sedley would +overhear the compliment--Rebecca spoke loud enough--and he did hear, +and (thinking in his heart that he was a very fine man) the praise +thrilled through every fibre of his big body, and made it tingle with +pleasure. Then, however, came a recoil. "Is the girl making fun of +me?" he thought, and straightway he bounced towards the bell, and was +for retreating, as we have seen, when his father's jokes and his +mother's entreaties caused him to pause and stay where he was. He +conducted the young lady down to dinner in a dubious and agitated frame +of mind. "Does she really think I am handsome?" thought he, "or is she +only making game of me?" We have talked of Joseph Sedley being as vain +as a girl. Heaven help us! the girls have only to turn the tables, and +say of one of their own sex, "She is as vain as a man," and they will +have perfect reason. The bearded creatures are quite as eager for +praise, quite as finikin over their toilettes, quite as proud of their +personal advantages, quite as conscious of their powers of fascination, +as any coquette in the world. + +Downstairs, then, they went, Joseph very red and blushing, Rebecca very +modest, and holding her green eyes downwards. She was dressed in +white, with bare shoulders as white as snow--the picture of youth, +unprotected innocence, and humble virgin simplicity. "I must be very +quiet," thought Rebecca, "and very much interested about India." + +Now we have heard how Mrs. Sedley had prepared a fine curry for her +son, just as he liked it, and in the course of dinner a portion of this +dish was offered to Rebecca. "What is it?" said she, turning an +appealing look to Mr. Joseph. + +"Capital," said he. His mouth was full of it: his face quite red with +the delightful exercise of gobbling. "Mother, it's as good as my own +curries in India." + +"Oh, I must try some, if it is an Indian dish," said Miss Rebecca. "I +am sure everything must be good that comes from there." + +"Give Miss Sharp some curry, my dear," said Mr. Sedley, laughing. + +Rebecca had never tasted the dish before. + +"Do you find it as good as everything else from India?" said Mr. Sedley. + +"Oh, excellent!" said Rebecca, who was suffering tortures with the +cayenne pepper. + +"Try a chili with it, Miss Sharp," said Joseph, really interested. + +"A chili," said Rebecca, gasping. "Oh yes!" She thought a chili was +something cool, as its name imported, and was served with some. "How +fresh and green they look," she said, and put one into her mouth. It +was hotter than the curry; flesh and blood could bear it no longer. +She laid down her fork. "Water, for Heaven's sake, water!" she cried. +Mr. Sedley burst out laughing (he was a coarse man, from the Stock +Exchange, where they love all sorts of practical jokes). "They are +real Indian, I assure you," said he. "Sambo, give Miss Sharp some +water." + +The paternal laugh was echoed by Joseph, who thought the joke capital. +The ladies only smiled a little. They thought poor Rebecca suffered +too much. She would have liked to choke old Sedley, but she swallowed +her mortification as well as she had the abominable curry before it, +and as soon as she could speak, said, with a comical, good-humoured +air, "I ought to have remembered the pepper which the Princess of +Persia puts in the cream-tarts in the Arabian Nights. Do you put +cayenne into your cream-tarts in India, sir?" + +Old Sedley began to laugh, and thought Rebecca was a good-humoured +girl. Joseph simply said, "Cream-tarts, Miss? Our cream is very bad in +Bengal. We generally use goats' milk; and, 'gad, do you know, I've got +to prefer it!" + +"You won't like EVERYTHING from India now, Miss Sharp," said the old +gentleman; but when the ladies had retired after dinner, the wily old +fellow said to his son, "Have a care, Joe; that girl is setting her cap +at you." + +"Pooh! nonsense!" said Joe, highly flattered. "I recollect, sir, there +was a girl at Dumdum, a daughter of Cutler of the Artillery, and +afterwards married to Lance, the surgeon, who made a dead set at me in +the year '4--at me and Mulligatawney, whom I mentioned to you before +dinner--a devilish good fellow Mulligatawney--he's a magistrate at +Budgebudge, and sure to be in council in five years. Well, sir, the +Artillery gave a ball, and Quintin, of the King's 14th, said to me, +'Sedley,' said he, 'I bet you thirteen to ten that Sophy Cutler hooks +either you or Mulligatawney before the rains.' 'Done,' says I; and +egad, sir--this claret's very good. Adamson's or Carbonell's?" + +A slight snore was the only reply: the honest stockbroker was asleep, +and so the rest of Joseph's story was lost for that day. But he was +always exceedingly communicative in a man's party, and has told this +delightful tale many scores of times to his apothecary, Dr. Gollop, +when he came to inquire about the liver and the blue-pill. + +Being an invalid, Joseph Sedley contented himself with a bottle of +claret besides his Madeira at dinner, and he managed a couple of plates +full of strawberries and cream, and twenty-four little rout cakes that +were lying neglected in a plate near him, and certainly (for novelists +have the privilege of knowing everything) he thought a great deal about +the girl upstairs. "A nice, gay, merry young creature," thought he to +himself. "How she looked at me when I picked up her handkerchief at +dinner! She dropped it twice. Who's that singing in the drawing-room? +'Gad! shall I go up and see?" + +But his modesty came rushing upon him with uncontrollable force. His +father was asleep: his hat was in the hall: there was a hackney-coach +standing hard by in Southampton Row. "I'll go and see the Forty +Thieves," said he, "and Miss Decamp's dance"; and he slipped away +gently on the pointed toes of his boots, and disappeared, without +waking his worthy parent. + +"There goes Joseph," said Amelia, who was looking from the open windows +of the drawing-room, while Rebecca was singing at the piano. + +"Miss Sharp has frightened him away," said Mrs. Sedley. "Poor Joe, why +WILL he be so shy?" + + + +CHAPTER IV + +The Green Silk Purse + +Poor Joe's panic lasted for two or three days; during which he did not +visit the house, nor during that period did Miss Rebecca ever mention +his name. She was all respectful gratitude to Mrs. Sedley; delighted +beyond measure at the Bazaars; and in a whirl of wonder at the theatre, +whither the good-natured lady took her. One day, Amelia had a +headache, and could not go upon some party of pleasure to which the two +young people were invited: nothing could induce her friend to go +without her. "What! you who have shown the poor orphan what happiness +and love are for the first time in her life--quit YOU? Never!" and +the green eyes looked up to Heaven and filled with tears; and Mrs. +Sedley could not but own that her daughter's friend had a charming kind +heart of her own. + +As for Mr. Sedley's jokes, Rebecca laughed at them with a cordiality +and perseverance which not a little pleased and softened that +good-natured gentleman. Nor was it with the chiefs of the family alone +that Miss Sharp found favour. She interested Mrs. Blenkinsop by +evincing the deepest sympathy in the raspberry-jam preserving, which +operation was then going on in the Housekeeper's room; she persisted in +calling Sambo "Sir," and "Mr. Sambo," to the delight of that attendant; +and she apologised to the lady's maid for giving her trouble in +venturing to ring the bell, with such sweetness and humility, that the +Servants' Hall was almost as charmed with her as the Drawing Room. + +Once, in looking over some drawings which Amelia had sent from school, +Rebecca suddenly came upon one which caused her to burst into tears and +leave the room. It was on the day when Joe Sedley made his second +appearance. + +Amelia hastened after her friend to know the cause of this display of +feeling, and the good-natured girl came back without her companion, +rather affected too. "You know, her father was our drawing-master, +Mamma, at Chiswick, and used to do all the best parts of our drawings." + +"My love! I'm sure I always heard Miss Pinkerton say that he did not +touch them--he only mounted them." "It was called mounting, Mamma. +Rebecca remembers the drawing, and her father working at it, and the +thought of it came upon her rather suddenly--and so, you know, she--" + +"The poor child is all heart," said Mrs. Sedley. + +"I wish she could stay with us another week," said Amelia. + +"She's devilish like Miss Cutler that I used to meet at Dumdum, only +fairer. She's married now to Lance, the Artillery Surgeon. Do you +know, Ma'am, that once Quintin, of the 14th, bet me--" + +"O Joseph, we know that story," said Amelia, laughing. "Never mind about +telling that; but persuade Mamma to write to Sir Something Crawley for +leave of absence for poor dear Rebecca: here she comes, her eyes red +with weeping." + +"I'm better, now," said the girl, with the sweetest smile possible, +taking good-natured Mrs. Sedley's extended hand and kissing it +respectfully. "How kind you all are to me! All," she added, with a +laugh, "except you, Mr. Joseph." + +"Me!" said Joseph, meditating an instant departure. "Gracious Heavens! +Good Gad! Miss Sharp!' + +"Yes; how could you be so cruel as to make me eat that horrid +pepper-dish at dinner, the first day I ever saw you? You are not so +good to me as dear Amelia." + +"He doesn't know you so well," cried Amelia. + +"I defy anybody not to be good to you, my dear," said her mother. + +"The curry was capital; indeed it was," said Joe, quite gravely. +"Perhaps there was NOT enough citron juice in it--no, there was NOT." + +"And the chilis?" + +"By Jove, how they made you cry out!" said Joe, caught by the ridicule +of the circumstance, and exploding in a fit of laughter which ended +quite suddenly, as usual. + +"I shall take care how I let YOU choose for me another time," said +Rebecca, as they went down again to dinner. "I didn't think men were +fond of putting poor harmless girls to pain." + +"By Gad, Miss Rebecca, I wouldn't hurt you for the world." + +"No," said she, "I KNOW you wouldn't"; and then she gave him ever so +gentle a pressure with her little hand, and drew it back quite +frightened, and looked first for one instant in his face, and then down +at the carpet-rods; and I am not prepared to say that Joe's heart did +not thump at this little involuntary, timid, gentle motion of regard on +the part of the simple girl. + +It was an advance, and as such, perhaps, some ladies of indisputable +correctness and gentility will condemn the action as immodest; but, you +see, poor dear Rebecca had all this work to do for herself. If a +person is too poor to keep a servant, though ever so elegant, he must +sweep his own rooms: if a dear girl has no dear Mamma to settle matters +with the young man, she must do it for herself. And oh, what a mercy +it is that these women do not exercise their powers oftener! We can't +resist them, if they do. Let them show ever so little inclination, and +men go down on their knees at once: old or ugly, it is all the same. +And this I set down as a positive truth. A woman with fair +opportunities, and without an absolute hump, may marry WHOM SHE LIKES. +Only let us be thankful that the darlings are like the beasts of the +field, and don't know their own power. They would overcome us entirely +if they did. + +"Egad!" thought Joseph, entering the dining-room, "I exactly begin to +feel as I did at Dumdum with Miss Cutler." Many sweet little appeals, +half tender, half jocular, did Miss Sharp make to him about the dishes +at dinner; for by this time she was on a footing of considerable +familiarity with the family, and as for the girls, they loved each +other like sisters. Young unmarried girls always do, if they are in a +house together for ten days. + +As if bent upon advancing Rebecca's plans in every way--what must +Amelia do, but remind her brother of a promise made last Easter +holidays--"When I was a girl at school," said she, laughing--a promise +that he, Joseph, would take her to Vauxhall. "Now," she said, "that +Rebecca is with us, will be the very time." + +"O, delightful!" said Rebecca, going to clap her hands; but she +recollected herself, and paused, like a modest creature, as she was. + +"To-night is not the night," said Joe. + +"Well, to-morrow." + +"To-morrow your Papa and I dine out," said Mrs. Sedley. + +"You don't suppose that I'm going, Mrs. Sed?" said her husband, "and +that a woman of your years and size is to catch cold, in such an +abominable damp place?" + +"The children must have someone with them," cried Mrs. Sedley. + +"Let Joe go," said-his father, laughing. "He's big enough." At which +speech even Mr. Sambo at the sideboard burst out laughing, and poor fat +Joe felt inclined to become a parricide almost. + +"Undo his stays!" continued the pitiless old gentleman. "Fling some +water in his face, Miss Sharp, or carry him upstairs: the dear +creature's fainting. Poor victim! carry him up; he's as light as a +feather!" + +"If I stand this, sir, I'm d------!" roared Joseph. + +"Order Mr. Jos's elephant, Sambo!" cried the father. "Send to Exeter +'Change, Sambo"; but seeing Jos ready almost to cry with vexation, the +old joker stopped his laughter, and said, holding out his hand to his +son, "It's all fair on the Stock Exchange, Jos--and, Sambo, never mind +the elephant, but give me and Mr. Jos a glass of Champagne. Boney +himself hasn't got such in his cellar, my boy!" + +A goblet of Champagne restored Joseph's equanimity, and before the +bottle was emptied, of which as an invalid he took two-thirds, he had +agreed to take the young ladies to Vauxhall. + +"The girls must have a gentleman apiece," said the old gentleman. "Jos +will be sure to leave Emmy in the crowd, he will be so taken up with +Miss Sharp here. Send to 96, and ask George Osborne if he'll come." + +At this, I don't know in the least for what reason, Mrs. Sedley looked +at her husband and laughed. Mr. Sedley's eyes twinkled in a manner +indescribably roguish, and he looked at Amelia; and Amelia, hanging +down her head, blushed as only young ladies of seventeen know how to +blush, and as Miss Rebecca Sharp never blushed in her life--at least +not since she was eight years old, and when she was caught stealing jam +out of a cupboard by her godmother. "Amelia had better write a note," +said her father; "and let George Osborne see what a beautiful +handwriting we have brought back from Miss Pinkerton's. Do you +remember when you wrote to him to come on Twelfth-night, Emmy, and +spelt twelfth without the f?" + +"That was years ago," said Amelia. + +"It seems like yesterday, don't it, John?" said Mrs. Sedley to her +husband; and that night in a conversation which took place in a front +room in the second floor, in a sort of tent, hung round with chintz of +a rich and fantastic India pattern, and double with calico of a tender +rose-colour; in the interior of which species of marquee was a +featherbed, on which were two pillows, on which were two round red +faces, one in a laced nightcap, and one in a simple cotton one, ending +in a tassel--in a CURTAIN LECTURE, I say, Mrs. Sedley took her husband +to task for his cruel conduct to poor Joe. + +"It was quite wicked of you, Mr. Sedley," said she, "to torment the +poor boy so." + +"My dear," said the cotton-tassel in defence of his conduct, "Jos is a +great deal vainer than you ever were in your life, and that's saying a +good deal. Though, some thirty years ago, in the year seventeen +hundred and eighty--what was it?--perhaps you had a right to be vain--I +don't say no. But I've no patience with Jos and his dandified modesty. +It is out-Josephing Joseph, my dear, and all the while the boy is only +thinking of himself, and what a fine fellow he is. I doubt, Ma'am, we +shall have some trouble with him yet. Here is Emmy's little friend +making love to him as hard as she can; that's quite clear; and if she +does not catch him some other will. That man is destined to be a prey +to woman, as I am to go on 'Change every day. It's a mercy he did not +bring us over a black daughter-in-law, my dear. But, mark my words, +the first woman who fishes for him, hooks him." + +"She shall go off to-morrow, the little artful creature," said Mrs. +Sedley, with great energy. + +"Why not she as well as another, Mrs. Sedley? The girl's a white face +at any rate. I don't care who marries him. Let Joe please himself." + +And presently the voices of the two speakers were hushed, or were +replaced by the gentle but unromantic music of the nose; and save when +the church bells tolled the hour and the watchman called it, all was +silent at the house of John Sedley, Esquire, of Russell Square, and the +Stock Exchange. + +When morning came, the good-natured Mrs. Sedley no longer thought of +executing her threats with regard to Miss Sharp; for though nothing is +more keen, nor more common, nor more justifiable, than maternal +jealousy, yet she could not bring herself to suppose that the little, +humble, grateful, gentle governess would dare to look up to such a +magnificent personage as the Collector of Boggley Wollah. The petition, +too, for an extension of the young lady's leave of absence had already +been despatched, and it would be difficult to find a pretext for +abruptly dismissing her. + +And as if all things conspired in favour of the gentle Rebecca, the +very elements (although she was not inclined at first to acknowledge +their action in her behalf) interposed to aid her. For on the evening +appointed for the Vauxhall party, George Osborne having come to dinner, +and the elders of the house having departed, according to invitation, +to dine with Alderman Balls at Highbury Barn, there came on such a +thunder-storm as only happens on Vauxhall nights, and as obliged the +young people, perforce, to remain at home. Mr. Osborne did not seem in +the least disappointed at this occurrence. He and Joseph Sedley drank a +fitting quantity of port-wine, tete-a-tete, in the dining-room, during +the drinking of which Sedley told a number of his best Indian stories; +for he was extremely talkative in man's society; and afterwards Miss +Amelia Sedley did the honours of the drawing-room; and these four young +persons passed such a comfortable evening together, that they declared +they were rather glad of the thunder-storm than otherwise, which had +caused them to put off their visit to Vauxhall. + +Osborne was Sedley's godson, and had been one of the family any time +these three-and-twenty years. At six weeks old, he had received from +John Sedley a present of a silver cup; at six months old, a coral with +gold whistle and bells; from his youth upwards he was "tipped" +regularly by the old gentleman at Christmas: and on going back to +school, he remembered perfectly well being thrashed by Joseph Sedley, +when the latter was a big, swaggering hobbadyhoy, and George an +impudent urchin of ten years old. In a word, George was as familiar +with the family as such daily acts of kindness and intercourse could +make him. + +"Do you remember, Sedley, what a fury you were in, when I cut off the +tassels of your Hessian boots, and how Miss--hem!--how Amelia rescued +me from a beating, by falling down on her knees and crying out to her +brother Jos, not to beat little George?" + +Jos remembered this remarkable circumstance perfectly well, but vowed +that he had totally forgotten it. + +"Well, do you remember coming down in a gig to Dr. Swishtail's to see +me, before you went to India, and giving me half a guinea and a pat on +the head? I always had an idea that you were at least seven feet high, +and was quite astonished at your return from India to find you no +taller than myself." + +"How good of Mr. Sedley to go to your school and give you the money!" +exclaimed Rebecca, in accents of extreme delight. + +"Yes, and after I had cut the tassels of his boots too. Boys never +forget those tips at school, nor the givers." + +"I delight in Hessian boots," said Rebecca. Jos Sedley, who admired +his own legs prodigiously, and always wore this ornamental chaussure, +was extremely pleased at this remark, though he drew his legs under his +chair as it was made. + +"Miss Sharp!" said George Osborne, "you who are so clever an artist, +you must make a grand historical picture of the scene of the boots. +Sedley shall be represented in buckskins, and holding one of the +injured boots in one hand; by the other he shall have hold of my +shirt-frill. Amelia shall be kneeling near him, with her little hands +up; and the picture shall have a grand allegorical title, as the +frontispieces have in the Medulla and the spelling-book." + +"I shan't have time to do it here," said Rebecca. "I'll do it +when--when I'm gone." And she dropped her voice, and looked so sad and +piteous, that everybody felt how cruel her lot was, and how sorry they +would be to part with her. + +"O that you could stay longer, dear Rebecca," said Amelia. + +"Why?" answered the other, still more sadly. "That I may be only the +more unhap--unwilling to lose you?" And she turned away her head. +Amelia began to give way to that natural infirmity of tears which, we +have said, was one of the defects of this silly little thing. George +Osborne looked at the two young women with a touched curiosity; and +Joseph Sedley heaved something very like a sigh out of his big chest, +as he cast his eyes down towards his favourite Hessian boots. + +"Let us have some music, Miss Sedley--Amelia," said George, who felt at +that moment an extraordinary, almost irresistible impulse to seize the +above-mentioned young woman in his arms, and to kiss her in the face of +the company; and she looked at him for a moment, and if I should say +that they fell in love with each other at that single instant of time, +I should perhaps be telling an untruth, for the fact is that these two +young people had been bred up by their parents for this very purpose, +and their banns had, as it were, been read in their respective families +any time these ten years. They went off to the piano, which was +situated, as pianos usually are, in the back drawing-room; and as it +was rather dark, Miss Amelia, in the most unaffected way in the world, +put her hand into Mr. Osborne's, who, of course, could see the way +among the chairs and ottomans a great deal better than she could. But +this arrangement left Mr. Joseph Sedley tete-a-tete with Rebecca, at +the drawing-room table, where the latter was occupied in knitting a +green silk purse. + +"There is no need to ask family secrets," said Miss Sharp. "Those two +have told theirs." + +"As soon as he gets his company," said Joseph, "I believe the affair is +settled. George Osborne is a capital fellow." + +"And your sister the dearest creature in the world," said Rebecca. +"Happy the man who wins her!" With this, Miss Sharp gave a great sigh. + +When two unmarried persons get together, and talk upon such delicate +subjects as the present, a great deal of confidence and intimacy is +presently established between them. There is no need of giving a +special report of the conversation which now took place between Mr. +Sedley and the young lady; for the conversation, as may be judged from +the foregoing specimen, was not especially witty or eloquent; it seldom +is in private societies, or anywhere except in very high-flown and +ingenious novels. As there was music in the next room, the talk was +carried on, of course, in a low and becoming tone, though, for the +matter of that, the couple in the next apartment would not have been +disturbed had the talking been ever so loud, so occupied were they with +their own pursuits. + +Almost for the first time in his life, Mr. Sedley found himself +talking, without the least timidity or hesitation, to a person of the +other sex. Miss Rebecca asked him a great number of questions about +India, which gave him an opportunity of narrating many interesting +anecdotes about that country and himself. He described the balls at +Government House, and the manner in which they kept themselves cool in +the hot weather, with punkahs, tatties, and other contrivances; and he +was very witty regarding the number of Scotchmen whom Lord Minto, the +Governor-General, patronised; and then he described a tiger-hunt; and +the manner in which the mahout of his elephant had been pulled off his +seat by one of the infuriated animals. How delighted Miss Rebecca was +at the Government balls, and how she laughed at the stories of the +Scotch aides-de-camp, and called Mr. Sedley a sad wicked satirical +creature; and how frightened she was at the story of the elephant! "For +your mother's sake, dear Mr. Sedley," she said, "for the sake of all +your friends, promise NEVER to go on one of those horrid expeditions." + +"Pooh, pooh, Miss Sharp," said he, pulling up his shirt-collars; "the +danger makes the sport only the pleasanter." He had never been but once +at a tiger-hunt, when the accident in question occurred, and when he +was half killed--not by the tiger, but by the fright. And as he talked +on, he grew quite bold, and actually had the audacity to ask Miss +Rebecca for whom she was knitting the green silk purse? He was quite +surprised and delighted at his own graceful familiar manner. + +"For any one who wants a purse," replied Miss Rebecca, looking at him +in the most gentle winning way. Sedley was going to make one of the +most eloquent speeches possible, and had begun--"O Miss Sharp, how--" +when some song which was performed in the other room came to an end, +and caused him to hear his own voice so distinctly that he stopped, +blushed, and blew his nose in great agitation. + +"Did you ever hear anything like your brother's eloquence?" whispered +Mr. Osborne to Amelia. "Why, your friend has worked miracles." + +"The more the better," said Miss Amelia; who, like almost all women who +are worth a pin, was a match-maker in her heart, and would have been +delighted that Joseph should carry back a wife to India. She had, too, +in the course of this few days' constant intercourse, warmed into a +most tender friendship for Rebecca, and discovered a million of virtues +and amiable qualities in her which she had not perceived when they were +at Chiswick together. For the affection of young ladies is of as rapid +growth as Jack's bean-stalk, and reaches up to the sky in a night. It +is no blame to them that after marriage this Sehnsucht nach der Liebe +subsides. It is what sentimentalists, who deal in very big words, call +a yearning after the Ideal, and simply means that women are commonly +not satisfied until they have husbands and children on whom they may +centre affections, which are spent elsewhere, as it were, in small +change. + +Having expended her little store of songs, or having stayed long enough +in the back drawing-room, it now appeared proper to Miss Amelia to ask +her friend to sing. "You would not have listened to me," she said to +Mr. Osborne (though she knew she was telling a fib), "had you heard +Rebecca first." + +"I give Miss Sharp warning, though," said Osborne, "that, right or +wrong, I consider Miss Amelia Sedley the first singer in the world." + +"You shall hear," said Amelia; and Joseph Sedley was actually polite +enough to carry the candles to the piano. Osborne hinted that he should +like quite as well to sit in the dark; but Miss Sedley, laughing, +declined to bear him company any farther, and the two accordingly +followed Mr. Joseph. Rebecca sang far better than her friend (though +of course Osborne was free to keep his opinion), and exerted herself to +the utmost, and, indeed, to the wonder of Amelia, who had never known +her perform so well. She sang a French song, which Joseph did not +understand in the least, and which George confessed he did not +understand, and then a number of those simple ballads which were the +fashion forty years ago, and in which British tars, our King, poor +Susan, blue-eyed Mary, and the like, were the principal themes. They +are not, it is said, very brilliant, in a musical point of view, but +contain numberless good-natured, simple appeals to the affections, +which people understood better than the milk-and-water lagrime, +sospiri, and felicita of the eternal Donizettian music with which we +are favoured now-a-days. + +Conversation of a sentimental sort, befitting the subject, was carried +on between the songs, to which Sambo, after he had brought the tea, the +delighted cook, and even Mrs. Blenkinsop, the housekeeper, condescended +to listen on the landing-place. + +Among these ditties was one, the last of the concert, and to the +following effect: + +Ah! bleak and barren was the moor, Ah! loud and piercing was the storm, +The cottage roof was shelter'd sure, The cottage hearth was bright and +warm--An orphan boy the lattice pass'd, And, as he mark'd its cheerful +glow, Felt doubly keen the midnight blast, And doubly cold the fallen +snow. + +They mark'd him as he onward prest, With fainting heart and weary limb; +Kind voices bade him turn and rest, And gentle faces welcomed him. The +dawn is up--the guest is gone, The cottage hearth is blazing still; +Heaven pity all poor wanderers lone! Hark to the wind upon the hill! + +It was the sentiment of the before-mentioned words, "When I'm gone," +over again. As she came to the last words, Miss Sharp's "deep-toned +voice faltered." Everybody felt the allusion to her departure, and to +her hapless orphan state. Joseph Sedley, who was fond of music, and +soft-hearted, was in a state of ravishment during the performance of +the song, and profoundly touched at its conclusion. If he had had the +courage; if George and Miss Sedley had remained, according to the +former's proposal, in the farther room, Joseph Sedley's bachelorhood +would have been at an end, and this work would never have been written. +But at the close of the ditty, Rebecca quitted the piano, and giving +her hand to Amelia, walked away into the front drawing-room twilight; +and, at this moment, Mr. Sambo made his appearance with a tray, +containing sandwiches, jellies, and some glittering glasses and +decanters, on which Joseph Sedley's attention was immediately fixed. +When the parents of the house of Sedley returned from their +dinner-party, they found the young people so busy in talking, that they +had not heard the arrival of the carriage, and Mr. Joseph was in the +act of saying, "My dear Miss Sharp, one little teaspoonful of jelly to +recruit you after your immense--your--your delightful exertions." + +"Bravo, Jos!" said Mr. Sedley; on hearing the bantering of which +well-known voice, Jos instantly relapsed into an alarmed silence, and +quickly took his departure. He did not lie awake all night thinking +whether or not he was in love with Miss Sharp; the passion of love +never interfered with the appetite or the slumber of Mr. Joseph Sedley; +but he thought to himself how delightful it would be to hear such songs +as those after Cutcherry--what a distinguee girl she was--how she could +speak French better than the Governor-General's lady herself--and what +a sensation she would make at the Calcutta balls. "It's evident the +poor devil's in love with me," thought he. "She is just as rich as +most of the girls who come out to India. I might go farther, and fare +worse, egad!" And in these meditations he fell asleep. + +How Miss Sharp lay awake, thinking, will he come or not to-morrow? need +not be told here. To-morrow came, and, as sure as fate, Mr. Joseph +Sedley made his appearance before luncheon. He had never been known +before to confer such an honour on Russell Square. George Osborne was +somehow there already (sadly "putting out" Amelia, who was writing to +her twelve dearest friends at Chiswick Mall), and Rebecca was employed +upon her yesterday's work. As Joe's buggy drove up, and while, after +his usual thundering knock and pompous bustle at the door, the +ex-Collector of Boggley Wollah laboured up stairs to the drawing-room, +knowing glances were telegraphed between Osborne and Miss Sedley, and +the pair, smiling archly, looked at Rebecca, who actually blushed as +she bent her fair ringlets over her knitting. How her heart beat as +Joseph appeared--Joseph, puffing from the staircase in shining creaking +boots--Joseph, in a new waistcoat, red with heat and nervousness, and +blushing behind his wadded neckcloth. It was a nervous moment for all; +and as for Amelia, I think she was more frightened than even the people +most concerned. + +Sambo, who flung open the door and announced Mr. Joseph, followed +grinning, in the Collector's rear, and bearing two handsome nosegays of +flowers, which the monster had actually had the gallantry to purchase +in Covent Garden Market that morning--they were not as big as the +haystacks which ladies carry about with them now-a-days, in cones of +filigree paper; but the young women were delighted with the gift, as +Joseph presented one to each, with an exceedingly solemn bow. + +"Bravo, Jos!" cried Osborne. + +"Thank you, dear Joseph," said Amelia, quite ready to kiss her brother, +if he were so minded. (And I think for a kiss from such a dear +creature as Amelia, I would purchase all Mr. Lee's conservatories out +of hand.) + +"O heavenly, heavenly flowers!" exclaimed Miss Sharp, and smelt them +delicately, and held them to her bosom, and cast up her eyes to the +ceiling, in an ecstasy of admiration. Perhaps she just looked first +into the bouquet, to see whether there was a billet-doux hidden among +the flowers; but there was no letter. + +"Do they talk the language of flowers at Boggley Wollah, Sedley?" asked +Osborne, laughing. + +"Pooh, nonsense!" replied the sentimental youth. "Bought 'em at +Nathan's; very glad you like 'em; and eh, Amelia, my dear, I bought a +pine-apple at the same time, which I gave to Sambo. Let's have it for +tiffin; very cool and nice this hot weather." Rebecca said she had +never tasted a pine, and longed beyond everything to taste one. + +So the conversation went on. I don't know on what pretext Osborne left +the room, or why, presently, Amelia went away, perhaps to superintend +the slicing of the pine-apple; but Jos was left alone with Rebecca, who +had resumed her work, and the green silk and the shining needles were +quivering rapidly under her white slender fingers. + +"What a beautiful, BYOO-OOTIFUL song that was you sang last night, dear +Miss Sharp," said the Collector. "It made me cry almost; 'pon my +honour it did." + +"Because you have a kind heart, Mr. Joseph; all the Sedleys have, I +think." + +"It kept me awake last night, and I was trying to hum it this morning, +in bed; I was, upon my honour. Gollop, my doctor, came in at eleven +(for I'm a sad invalid, you know, and see Gollop every day), and, 'gad! +there I was, singing away like--a robin." + +"O you droll creature! Do let me hear you sing it." + +"Me? No, you, Miss Sharp; my dear Miss Sharp, do sing it." "Not now, +Mr. Sedley," said Rebecca, with a sigh. "My spirits are not equal to +it; besides, I must finish the purse. Will you help me, Mr. Sedley?" +And before he had time to ask how, Mr. Joseph Sedley, of the East India +Company's service, was actually seated tete-a-tete with a young lady, +looking at her with a most killing expression; his arms stretched out +before her in an imploring attitude, and his hands bound in a web of +green silk, which she was unwinding. + +In this romantic position Osborne and Amelia found the interesting +pair, when they entered to announce that tiffin was ready. The skein +of silk was just wound round the card; but Mr. Jos had never spoken. + +"I am sure he will to-night, dear," Amelia said, as she pressed +Rebecca's hand; and Sedley, too, had communed with his soul, and said +to himself, "'Gad, I'll pop the question at Vauxhall." + + + +CHAPTER V + +Dobbin of Ours + +Cuff's fight with Dobbin, and the unexpected issue of that contest, +will long be remembered by every man who was educated at Dr. +Swishtail's famous school. The latter Youth (who used to be called +Heigh-ho Dobbin, Gee-ho Dobbin, and by many other names indicative of +puerile contempt) was the quietest, the clumsiest, and, as it seemed, +the dullest of all Dr. Swishtail's young gentlemen. His parent was a +grocer in the city: and it was bruited abroad that he was admitted into +Dr. Swishtail's academy upon what are called "mutual principles"--that +is to say, the expenses of his board and schooling were defrayed by his +father in goods, not money; and he stood there--most at the bottom of +the school--in his scraggy corduroys and jacket, through the seams of +which his great big bones were bursting--as the representative of so +many pounds of tea, candles, sugar, mottled-soap, plums (of which a +very mild proportion was supplied for the puddings of the +establishment), and other commodities. A dreadful day it was for young +Dobbin when one of the youngsters of the school, having run into the +town upon a poaching excursion for hardbake and polonies, espied the +cart of Dobbin & Rudge, Grocers and Oilmen, Thames Street, London, at +the Doctor's door, discharging a cargo of the wares in which the firm +dealt. + +Young Dobbin had no peace after that. The jokes were frightful, and +merciless against him. "Hullo, Dobbin," one wag would say, "here's +good news in the paper. Sugars is ris', my boy." Another would set a +sum--"If a pound of mutton-candles cost sevenpence-halfpenny, how much +must Dobbin cost?" and a roar would follow from all the circle of young +knaves, usher and all, who rightly considered that the selling of goods +by retail is a shameful and infamous practice, meriting the contempt +and scorn of all real gentlemen. + +"Your father's only a merchant, Osborne," Dobbin said in private to the +little boy who had brought down the storm upon him. At which the +latter replied haughtily, "My father's a gentleman, and keeps his +carriage"; and Mr. William Dobbin retreated to a remote outhouse in the +playground, where he passed a half-holiday in the bitterest sadness and +woe. Who amongst us is there that does not recollect similar hours of +bitter, bitter childish grief? Who feels injustice; who shrinks before +a slight; who has a sense of wrong so acute, and so glowing a gratitude +for kindness, as a generous boy? and how many of those gentle souls do +you degrade, estrange, torture, for the sake of a little loose +arithmetic, and miserable dog-latin? + +Now, William Dobbin, from an incapacity to acquire the rudiments of the +above language, as they are propounded in that wonderful book the Eton +Latin Grammar, was compelled to remain among the very last of Doctor +Swishtail's scholars, and was "taken down" continually by little +fellows with pink faces and pinafores when he marched up with the lower +form, a giant amongst them, with his downcast, stupefied look, his +dog's-eared primer, and his tight corduroys. High and low, all made +fun of him. They sewed up those corduroys, tight as they were. They +cut his bed-strings. They upset buckets and benches, so that he might +break his shins over them, which he never failed to do. They sent him +parcels, which, when opened, were found to contain the paternal soap +and candles. There was no little fellow but had his jeer and joke at +Dobbin; and he bore everything quite patiently, and was entirely dumb +and miserable. + +Cuff, on the contrary, was the great chief and dandy of the Swishtail +Seminary. He smuggled wine in. He fought the town-boys. Ponies used +to come for him to ride home on Saturdays. He had his top-boots in his +room, in which he used to hunt in the holidays. He had a gold +repeater: and took snuff like the Doctor. He had been to the Opera, +and knew the merits of the principal actors, preferring Mr. Kean to Mr. +Kemble. He could knock you off forty Latin verses in an hour. He +could make French poetry. What else didn't he know, or couldn't he do? +They said even the Doctor himself was afraid of him. + +Cuff, the unquestioned king of the school, ruled over his subjects, and +bullied them, with splendid superiority. This one blacked his shoes: +that toasted his bread, others would fag out, and give him balls at +cricket during whole summer afternoons. "Figs" was the fellow whom he +despised most, and with whom, though always abusing him, and sneering +at him, he scarcely ever condescended to hold personal communication. + +One day in private, the two young gentlemen had had a difference. Figs, +alone in the schoolroom, was blundering over a home letter; when Cuff, +entering, bade him go upon some message, of which tarts were probably +the subject. + +"I can't," says Dobbin; "I want to finish my letter." + +"You CAN'T?" says Mr. Cuff, laying hold of that document (in which many +words were scratched out, many were mis-spelt, on which had been spent +I don't know how much thought, and labour, and tears; for the poor +fellow was writing to his mother, who was fond of him, although she was +a grocer's wife, and lived in a back parlour in Thames Street). "You +CAN'T?" says Mr. Cuff: "I should like to know why, pray? Can't you +write to old Mother Figs to-morrow?" + +"Don't call names," Dobbin said, getting off the bench very nervous. + +"Well, sir, will you go?" crowed the cock of the school. + +"Put down the letter," Dobbin replied; "no gentleman readth letterth." + +"Well, NOW will you go?" says the other. + +"No, I won't. Don't strike, or I'll THMASH you," roars out Dobbin, +springing to a leaden inkstand, and looking so wicked, that Mr. Cuff +paused, turned down his coat sleeves again, put his hands into his +pockets, and walked away with a sneer. But he never meddled personally +with the grocer's boy after that; though we must do him the justice to +say he always spoke of Mr. Dobbin with contempt behind his back. + +Some time after this interview, it happened that Mr. Cuff, on a +sunshiny afternoon, was in the neighbourhood of poor William Dobbin, +who was lying under a tree in the playground, spelling over a favourite +copy of the Arabian Nights which he had apart from the rest of the +school, who were pursuing their various sports--quite lonely, and +almost happy. If people would but leave children to themselves; if +teachers would cease to bully them; if parents would not insist upon +directing their thoughts, and dominating their feelings--those feelings +and thoughts which are a mystery to all (for how much do you and I know +of each other, of our children, of our fathers, of our neighbour, and +how far more beautiful and sacred are the thoughts of the poor lad or +girl whom you govern likely to be, than those of the dull and +world-corrupted person who rules him?)--if, I say, parents and masters +would leave their children alone a little more, small harm would +accrue, although a less quantity of as in praesenti might be acquired. + +Well, William Dobbin had for once forgotten the world, and was away +with Sindbad the Sailor in the Valley of Diamonds, or with Prince Ahmed +and the Fairy Peribanou in that delightful cavern where the Prince +found her, and whither we should all like to make a tour; when shrill +cries, as of a little fellow weeping, woke up his pleasant reverie; and +looking up, he saw Cuff before him, belabouring a little boy. + +It was the lad who had peached upon him about the grocer's cart; but he +bore little malice, not at least towards the young and small. "How dare +you, sir, break the bottle?" says Cuff to the little urchin, swinging a +yellow cricket-stump over him. + +The boy had been instructed to get over the playground wall (at a +selected spot where the broken glass had been removed from the top, and +niches made convenient in the brick); to run a quarter of a mile; to +purchase a pint of rum-shrub on credit; to brave all the Doctor's +outlying spies, and to clamber back into the playground again; during +the performance of which feat, his foot had slipt, and the bottle was +broken, and the shrub had been spilt, and his pantaloons had been +damaged, and he appeared before his employer a perfectly guilty and +trembling, though harmless, wretch. + +"How dare you, sir, break it?" says Cuff; "you blundering little thief. +You drank the shrub, and now you pretend to have broken the bottle. +Hold out your hand, sir." + +Down came the stump with a great heavy thump on the child's hand. A +moan followed. Dobbin looked up. The Fairy Peribanou had fled into the +inmost cavern with Prince Ahmed: the Roc had whisked away Sindbad the +Sailor out of the Valley of Diamonds out of sight, far into the clouds: +and there was everyday life before honest William; and a big boy +beating a little one without cause. + +"Hold out your other hand, sir," roars Cuff to his little schoolfellow, +whose face was distorted with pain. Dobbin quivered, and gathered +himself up in his narrow old clothes. + +"Take that, you little devil!" cried Mr. Cuff, and down came the wicket +again on the child's hand.--Don't be horrified, ladies, every boy at a +public school has done it. Your children will so do and be done by, in +all probability. Down came the wicket again; and Dobbin started up. + +I can't tell what his motive was. Torture in a public school is as +much licensed as the knout in Russia. It would be ungentlemanlike (in +a manner) to resist it. Perhaps Dobbin's foolish soul revolted against +that exercise of tyranny; or perhaps he had a hankering feeling of +revenge in his mind, and longed to measure himself against that +splendid bully and tyrant, who had all the glory, pride, pomp, +circumstance, banners flying, drums beating, guards saluting, in the +place. Whatever may have been his incentive, however, up he sprang, +and screamed out, "Hold off, Cuff; don't bully that child any more; or +I'll--" + +"Or you'll what?" Cuff asked in amazement at this interruption. "Hold +out your hand, you little beast." + +"I'll give you the worst thrashing you ever had in your life," Dobbin +said, in reply to the first part of Cuff's sentence; and little +Osborne, gasping and in tears, looked up with wonder and incredulity at +seeing this amazing champion put up suddenly to defend him: while +Cuff's astonishment was scarcely less. Fancy our late monarch George +III when he heard of the revolt of the North American colonies: fancy +brazen Goliath when little David stepped forward and claimed a meeting; +and you have the feelings of Mr. Reginald Cuff when this rencontre was +proposed to him. + +"After school," says he, of course; after a pause and a look, as much +as to say, "Make your will, and communicate your last wishes to your +friends between this time and that." + +"As you please," Dobbin said. "You must be my bottle holder, Osborne." + +"Well, if you like," little Osborne replied; for you see his papa kept +a carriage, and he was rather ashamed of his champion. + +Yes, when the hour of battle came, he was almost ashamed to say, "Go +it, Figs"; and not a single other boy in the place uttered that cry for +the first two or three rounds of this famous combat; at the +commencement of which the scientific Cuff, with a contemptuous smile on +his face, and as light and as gay as if he was at a ball, planted his +blows upon his adversary, and floored that unlucky champion three times +running. At each fall there was a cheer; and everybody was anxious to +have the honour of offering the conqueror a knee. + +"What a licking I shall get when it's over," young Osborne thought, +picking up his man. "You'd best give in," he said to Dobbin; "it's +only a thrashing, Figs, and you know I'm used to it." But Figs, all +whose limbs were in a quiver, and whose nostrils were breathing rage, +put his little bottle-holder aside, and went in for a fourth time. + +As he did not in the least know how to parry the blows that were aimed +at himself, and Cuff had begun the attack on the three preceding +occasions, without ever allowing his enemy to strike, Figs now +determined that he would commence the engagement by a charge on his own +part; and accordingly, being a left-handed man, brought that arm into +action, and hit out a couple of times with all his might--once at Mr. +Cuff's left eye, and once on his beautiful Roman nose. + +Cuff went down this time, to the astonishment of the assembly. "Well +hit, by Jove," says little Osborne, with the air of a connoisseur, +clapping his man on the back. "Give it him with the left, Figs my boy." + +Figs's left made terrific play during all the rest of the combat. Cuff +went down every time. At the sixth round, there were almost as many +fellows shouting out, "Go it, Figs," as there were youths exclaiming, +"Go it, Cuff." At the twelfth round the latter champion was all abroad, +as the saying is, and had lost all presence of mind and power of attack +or defence. Figs, on the contrary, was as calm as a quaker. His face +being quite pale, his eyes shining open, and a great cut on his +underlip bleeding profusely, gave this young fellow a fierce and +ghastly air, which perhaps struck terror into many spectators. +Nevertheless, his intrepid adversary prepared to close for the +thirteenth time. + +If I had the pen of a Napier, or a Bell's Life, I should like to +describe this combat properly. It was the last charge of the +Guard--(that is, it would have been, only Waterloo had not yet taken +place)--it was Ney's column breasting the hill of La Haye Sainte, +bristling with ten thousand bayonets, and crowned with twenty +eagles--it was the shout of the beef-eating British, as leaping down +the hill they rushed to hug the enemy in the savage arms of battle--in +other words, Cuff coming up full of pluck, but quite reeling and +groggy, the Fig-merchant put in his left as usual on his adversary's +nose, and sent him down for the last time. + +"I think that will do for him," Figs said, as his opponent dropped as +neatly on the green as I have seen Jack Spot's ball plump into the +pocket at billiards; and the fact is, when time was called, Mr. +Reginald Cuff was not able, or did not choose, to stand up again. + +And now all the boys set up such a shout for Figs as would have made +you think he had been their darling champion through the whole battle; +and as absolutely brought Dr. Swishtail out of his study, curious to +know the cause of the uproar. He threatened to flog Figs violently, of +course; but Cuff, who had come to himself by this time, and was washing +his wounds, stood up and said, "It's my fault, sir--not Figs'--not +Dobbin's. I was bullying a little boy; and he served me right." By +which magnanimous speech he not only saved his conqueror a whipping, +but got back all his ascendancy over the boys which his defeat had +nearly cost him. + +Young Osborne wrote home to his parents an account of the transaction. + + +Sugarcane House, Richmond, March, 18-- + +DEAR MAMA,--I hope you are quite well. I should be much obliged to you +to send me a cake and five shillings. There has been a fight here +between Cuff & Dobbin. Cuff, you know, was the Cock of the School. +They fought thirteen rounds, and Dobbin Licked. So Cuff is now Only +Second Cock. The fight was about me. Cuff was licking me for breaking +a bottle of milk, and Figs wouldn't stand it. We call him Figs because +his father is a Grocer--Figs & Rudge, Thames St., City--I think as he +fought for me you ought to buy your Tea & Sugar at his father's. Cuff +goes home every Saturday, but can't this, because he has 2 Black Eyes. +He has a white Pony to come and fetch him, and a groom in livery on a +bay mare. I wish my Papa would let me have a Pony, and I am + +Your dutiful Son, GEORGE SEDLEY OSBORNE + +P.S.--Give my love to little Emmy. I am cutting her out a Coach in +cardboard. Please not a seed-cake, but a plum-cake. + + +In consequence of Dobbin's victory, his character rose prodigiously in +the estimation of all his schoolfellows, and the name of Figs, which +had been a byword of reproach, became as respectable and popular a +nickname as any other in use in the school. "After all, it's not his +fault that his father's a grocer," George Osborne said, who, though a +little chap, had a very high popularity among the Swishtail youth; and +his opinion was received with great applause. It was voted low to sneer +at Dobbin about this accident of birth. "Old Figs" grew to be a name of +kindness and endearment; and the sneak of an usher jeered at him no +longer. + +And Dobbin's spirit rose with his altered circumstances. He made +wonderful advances in scholastic learning. The superb Cuff himself, at +whose condescension Dobbin could only blush and wonder, helped him on +with his Latin verses; "coached" him in play-hours: carried him +triumphantly out of the little-boy class into the middle-sized form; +and even there got a fair place for him. It was discovered, that +although dull at classical learning, at mathematics he was uncommonly +quick. To the contentment of all he passed third in algebra, and got a +French prize-book at the public Midsummer examination. You should have +seen his mother's face when Telemaque (that delicious romance) was +presented to him by the Doctor in the face of the whole school and the +parents and company, with an inscription to Gulielmo Dobbin. All the +boys clapped hands in token of applause and sympathy. His blushes, his +stumbles, his awkwardness, and the number of feet which he crushed as +he went back to his place, who shall describe or calculate? Old Dobbin, +his father, who now respected him for the first time, gave him two +guineas publicly; most of which he spent in a general tuck-out for the +school: and he came back in a tail-coat after the holidays. + +Dobbin was much too modest a young fellow to suppose that this happy +change in all his circumstances arose from his own generous and manly +disposition: he chose, from some perverseness, to attribute his good +fortune to the sole agency and benevolence of little George Osborne, to +whom henceforth he vowed such a love and affection as is only felt by +children--such an affection, as we read in the charming fairy-book, +uncouth Orson had for splendid young Valentine his conqueror. He flung +himself down at little Osborne's feet, and loved him. Even before they +were acquainted, he had admired Osborne in secret. Now he was his +valet, his dog, his man Friday. He believed Osborne to be the +possessor of every perfection, to be the handsomest, the bravest, the +most active, the cleverest, the most generous of created boys. He +shared his money with him: bought him uncountable presents of knives, +pencil-cases, gold seals, toffee, Little Warblers, and romantic books, +with large coloured pictures of knights and robbers, in many of which +latter you might read inscriptions to George Sedley Osborne, Esquire, +from his attached friend William Dobbin--the which tokens of homage +George received very graciously, as became his superior merit. + +So that Lieutenant Osborne, when coming to Russell Square on the day of +the Vauxhall party, said to the ladies, "Mrs. Sedley, Ma'am, I hope you +have room; I've asked Dobbin of ours to come and dine here, and go with +us to Vauxhall. He's almost as modest as Jos." + +"Modesty! pooh," said the stout gentleman, casting a vainqueur look at +Miss Sharp. + +"He is--but you are incomparably more graceful, Sedley," Osborne added, +laughing. "I met him at the Bedford, when I went to look for you; and +I told him that Miss Amelia was come home, and that we were all bent on +going out for a night's pleasuring; and that Mrs. Sedley had forgiven +his breaking the punch-bowl at the child's party. Don't you remember +the catastrophe, Ma'am, seven years ago?" + +"Over Mrs. Flamingo's crimson silk gown," said good-natured Mrs. +Sedley. "What a gawky it was! And his sisters are not much more +graceful. Lady Dobbin was at Highbury last night with three of them. +Such figures! my dears." + +"The Alderman's very rich, isn't he?" Osborne said archly. "Don't you +think one of the daughters would be a good spec for me, Ma'am?" + +"You foolish creature! Who would take you, I should like to know, with +your yellow face?" + +"Mine a yellow face? Stop till you see Dobbin. Why, he had the yellow +fever three times; twice at Nassau, and once at St. Kitts." + +"Well, well; yours is quite yellow enough for us. Isn't it, Emmy?" +Mrs. Sedley said: at which speech Miss Amelia only made a smile and a +blush; and looking at Mr. George Osborne's pale interesting +countenance, and those beautiful black, curling, shining whiskers, +which the young gentleman himself regarded with no ordinary +complacency, she thought in her little heart that in His Majesty's +army, or in the wide world, there never was such a face or such a hero. +"I don't care about Captain Dobbin's complexion," she said, "or about +his awkwardness. I shall always like him, I know," her little reason +being, that he was the friend and champion of George. + +"There's not a finer fellow in the service," Osborne said, "nor a +better officer, though he is not an Adonis, certainly." And he looked +towards the glass himself with much naivete; and in so doing, caught +Miss Sharp's eye fixed keenly upon him, at which he blushed a little, +and Rebecca thought in her heart, "Ah, mon beau Monsieur! I think I +have YOUR gauge"--the little artful minx! + +That evening, when Amelia came tripping into the drawing-room in a +white muslin frock, prepared for conquest at Vauxhall, singing like a +lark, and as fresh as a rose--a very tall ungainly gentleman, with +large hands and feet, and large ears, set off by a closely cropped head +of black hair, and in the hideous military frogged coat and cocked hat +of those times, advanced to meet her, and made her one of the clumsiest +bows that was ever performed by a mortal. + +This was no other than Captain William Dobbin, of His Majesty's +Regiment of Foot, returned from yellow fever, in the West Indies, to +which the fortune of the service had ordered his regiment, whilst so +many of his gallant comrades were reaping glory in the Peninsula. + +He had arrived with a knock so very timid and quiet that it was +inaudible to the ladies upstairs: otherwise, you may be sure Miss +Amelia would never have been so bold as to come singing into the room. +As it was, the sweet fresh little voice went right into the Captain's +heart, and nestled there. When she held out her hand for him to shake, +before he enveloped it in his own, he paused, and thought--"Well, is it +possible--are you the little maid I remember in the pink frock, such a +short time ago--the night I upset the punch-bowl, just after I was +gazetted? Are you the little girl that George Osborne said should marry +him? What a blooming young creature you seem, and what a prize the +rogue has got!" All this he thought, before he took Amelia's hand into +his own, and as he let his cocked hat fall. + +His history since he left school, until the very moment when we have +the pleasure of meeting him again, although not fully narrated, has +yet, I think, been indicated sufficiently for an ingenious reader by +the conversation in the last page. Dobbin, the despised grocer, was +Alderman Dobbin--Alderman Dobbin was Colonel of the City Light Horse, +then burning with military ardour to resist the French Invasion. +Colonel Dobbin's corps, in which old Mr. Osborne himself was but an +indifferent corporal, had been reviewed by the Sovereign and the Duke +of York; and the colonel and alderman had been knighted. His son had +entered the army: and young Osborne followed presently in the same +regiment. They had served in the West Indies and in Canada. Their +regiment had just come home, and the attachment of Dobbin to George +Osborne was as warm and generous now as it had been when the two were +schoolboys. + +So these worthy people sat down to dinner presently. They talked about +war and glory, and Boney and Lord Wellington, and the last Gazette. In +those famous days every gazette had a victory in it, and the two +gallant young men longed to see their own names in the glorious list, +and cursed their unlucky fate to belong to a regiment which had been +away from the chances of honour. Miss Sharp kindled with this exciting +talk, but Miss Sedley trembled and grew quite faint as she heard it. +Mr. Jos told several of his tiger-hunting stories, finished the one +about Miss Cutler and Lance the surgeon; helped Rebecca to everything +on the table, and himself gobbled and drank a great deal. + +He sprang to open the door for the ladies, when they retired, with the +most killing grace--and coming back to the table, filled himself bumper +after bumper of claret, which he swallowed with nervous rapidity. + +"He's priming himself," Osborne whispered to Dobbin, and at length the +hour and the carriage arrived for Vauxhall. + + + +CHAPTER VI + +Vauxhall + +I know that the tune I am piping is a very mild one (although there are +some terrific chapters coming presently), and must beg the good-natured +reader to remember that we are only discoursing at present about a +stockbroker's family in Russell Square, who are taking walks, or +luncheon, or dinner, or talking and making love as people do in common +life, and without a single passionate and wonderful incident to mark +the progress of their loves. The argument stands thus--Osborne, in +love with Amelia, has asked an old friend to dinner and to +Vauxhall--Jos Sedley is in love with Rebecca. Will he marry her? That +is the great subject now in hand. + +We might have treated this subject in the genteel, or in the romantic, +or in the facetious manner. Suppose we had laid the scene in Grosvenor +Square, with the very same adventures--would not some people have +listened? Suppose we had shown how Lord Joseph Sedley fell in love, and +the Marquis of Osborne became attached to Lady Amelia, with the full +consent of the Duke, her noble father: or instead of the supremely +genteel, suppose we had resorted to the entirely low, and described +what was going on in Mr. Sedley's kitchen--how black Sambo was in love +with the cook (as indeed he was), and how he fought a battle with the +coachman in her behalf; how the knife-boy was caught stealing a cold +shoulder of mutton, and Miss Sedley's new femme de chambre refused to +go to bed without a wax candle; such incidents might be made to provoke +much delightful laughter, and be supposed to represent scenes of +"life." Or if, on the contrary, we had taken a fancy for the terrible, +and made the lover of the new femme de chambre a professional burglar, +who bursts into the house with his band, slaughters black Sambo at the +feet of his master, and carries off Amelia in her night-dress, not to +be let loose again till the third volume, we should easily have +constructed a tale of thrilling interest, through the fiery chapters of +which the reader should hurry, panting. But my readers must hope for +no such romance, only a homely story, and must be content with a +chapter about Vauxhall, which is so short that it scarce deserves to be +called a chapter at all. And yet it is a chapter, and a very important +one too. Are not there little chapters in everybody's life, that seem +to be nothing, and yet affect all the rest of the history? + +Let us then step into the coach with the Russell Square party, and be +off to the Gardens. There is barely room between Jos and Miss Sharp, +who are on the front seat. Mr. Osborne sitting bodkin opposite, +between Captain Dobbin and Amelia. + +Every soul in the coach agreed that on that night Jos would propose to +make Rebecca Sharp Mrs. Sedley. The parents at home had acquiesced in +the arrangement, though, between ourselves, old Mr. Sedley had a +feeling very much akin to contempt for his son. He said he was vain, +selfish, lazy, and effeminate. He could not endure his airs as a man +of fashion, and laughed heartily at his pompous braggadocio stories. +"I shall leave the fellow half my property," he said; "and he will +have, besides, plenty of his own; but as I am perfectly sure that if +you, and I, and his sister were to die to-morrow, he would say 'Good +Gad!' and eat his dinner just as well as usual, I am not going to make +myself anxious about him. Let him marry whom he likes. It's no affair +of mine." + +Amelia, on the other hand, as became a young woman of her prudence and +temperament, was quite enthusiastic for the match. Once or twice Jos +had been on the point of saying something very important to her, to +which she was most willing to lend an ear, but the fat fellow could not +be brought to unbosom himself of his great secret, and very much to his +sister's disappointment he only rid himself of a large sigh and turned +away. + +This mystery served to keep Amelia's gentle bosom in a perpetual +flutter of excitement. If she did not speak with Rebecca on the tender +subject, she compensated herself with long and intimate conversations +with Mrs. Blenkinsop, the housekeeper, who dropped some hints to the +lady's-maid, who may have cursorily mentioned the matter to the cook, +who carried the news, I have no doubt, to all the tradesmen, so that +Mr. Jos's marriage was now talked of by a very considerable number of +persons in the Russell Square world. + +It was, of course, Mrs. Sedley's opinion that her son would demean +himself by a marriage with an artist's daughter. "But, lor', Ma'am," +ejaculated Mrs. Blenkinsop, "we was only grocers when we married Mr. +S., who was a stock-broker's clerk, and we hadn't five hundred pounds +among us, and we're rich enough now." And Amelia was entirely of this +opinion, to which, gradually, the good-natured Mrs. Sedley was brought. + +Mr. Sedley was neutral. "Let Jos marry whom he likes," he said; "it's +no affair of mine. This girl has no fortune; no more had Mrs. Sedley. +She seems good-humoured and clever, and will keep him in order, +perhaps. Better she, my dear, than a black Mrs. Sedley, and a dozen of +mahogany grandchildren." + +So that everything seemed to smile upon Rebecca's fortunes. She took +Jos's arm, as a matter of course, on going to dinner; she had sate by +him on the box of his open carriage (a most tremendous "buck" he was, +as he sat there, serene, in state, driving his greys), and though +nobody said a word on the subject of the marriage, everybody seemed to +understand it. All she wanted was the proposal, and ah! how Rebecca +now felt the want of a mother!--a dear, tender mother, who would have +managed the business in ten minutes, and, in the course of a little +delicate confidential conversation, would have extracted the +interesting avowal from the bashful lips of the young man! + +Such was the state of affairs as the carriage crossed Westminster +bridge. + +The party was landed at the Royal Gardens in due time. As the majestic +Jos stepped out of the creaking vehicle the crowd gave a cheer for the +fat gentleman, who blushed and looked very big and mighty, as he walked +away with Rebecca under his arm. George, of course, took charge of +Amelia. She looked as happy as a rose-tree in sunshine. + +"I say, Dobbin," says George, "just look to the shawls and things, +there's a good fellow." And so while he paired off with Miss Sedley, +and Jos squeezed through the gate into the gardens with Rebecca at his +side, honest Dobbin contented himself by giving an arm to the shawls, +and by paying at the door for the whole party. + +He walked very modestly behind them. He was not willing to spoil +sport. About Rebecca and Jos he did not care a fig. But he thought +Amelia worthy even of the brilliant George Osborne, and as he saw that +good-looking couple threading the walks to the girl's delight and +wonder, he watched her artless happiness with a sort of fatherly +pleasure. Perhaps he felt that he would have liked to have something +on his own arm besides a shawl (the people laughed at seeing the gawky +young officer carrying this female burthen); but William Dobbin was +very little addicted to selfish calculation at all; and so long as his +friend was enjoying himself, how should he be discontented? And the +truth is, that of all the delights of the Gardens; of the hundred +thousand extra lamps, which were always lighted; the fiddlers in cocked +hats, who played ravishing melodies under the gilded cockle-shell in +the midst of the gardens; the singers, both of comic and sentimental +ballads, who charmed the ears there; the country dances, formed by +bouncing cockneys and cockneyesses, and executed amidst jumping, +thumping and laughter; the signal which announced that Madame Saqui was +about to mount skyward on a slack-rope ascending to the stars; the +hermit that always sat in the illuminated hermitage; the dark walks, so +favourable to the interviews of young lovers; the pots of stout handed +about by the people in the shabby old liveries; and the twinkling +boxes, in which the happy feasters made-believe to eat slices of almost +invisible ham--of all these things, and of the gentle Simpson, that +kind smiling idiot, who, I daresay, presided even then over the +place--Captain William Dobbin did not take the slightest notice. + +He carried about Amelia's white cashmere shawl, and having attended +under the gilt cockle-shell, while Mrs. Salmon performed the Battle of +Borodino (a savage cantata against the Corsican upstart, who had lately +met with his Russian reverses)--Mr. Dobbin tried to hum it as he walked +away, and found he was humming--the tune which Amelia Sedley sang on +the stairs, as she came down to dinner. + +He burst out laughing at himself; for the truth is, he could sing no +better than an owl. + +It is to be understood, as a matter of course, that our young people, +being in parties of two and two, made the most solemn promises to keep +together during the evening, and separated in ten minutes afterwards. +Parties at Vauxhall always did separate, but 'twas only to meet again +at supper-time, when they could talk of their mutual adventures in the +interval. + +What were the adventures of Mr. Osborne and Miss Amelia? That is a +secret. But be sure of this--they were perfectly happy, and correct in +their behaviour; and as they had been in the habit of being together +any time these fifteen years, their tete-a-tete offered no particular +novelty. + +But when Miss Rebecca Sharp and her stout companion lost themselves in +a solitary walk, in which there were not above five score more of +couples similarly straying, they both felt that the situation was +extremely tender and critical, and now or never was the moment Miss +Sharp thought, to provoke that declaration which was trembling on the +timid lips of Mr. Sedley. They had previously been to the panorama of +Moscow, where a rude fellow, treading on Miss Sharp's foot, caused her +to fall back with a little shriek into the arms of Mr. Sedley, and this +little incident increased the tenderness and confidence of that +gentleman to such a degree, that he told her several of his favourite +Indian stories over again for, at least, the sixth time. + +"How I should like to see India!" said Rebecca. + +"SHOULD you?" said Joseph, with a most killing tenderness; and was no +doubt about to follow up this artful interrogatory by a question still +more tender (for he puffed and panted a great deal, and Rebecca's hand, +which was placed near his heart, could count the feverish pulsations of +that organ), when, oh, provoking! the bell rang for the fireworks, and, +a great scuffling and running taking place, these interesting lovers +were obliged to follow in the stream of people. + +Captain Dobbin had some thoughts of joining the party at supper: as, in +truth, he found the Vauxhall amusements not particularly lively--but he +paraded twice before the box where the now united couples were met, and +nobody took any notice of him. Covers were laid for four. The mated +pairs were prattling away quite happily, and Dobbin knew he was as +clean forgotten as if he had never existed in this world. + +"I should only be de trop," said the Captain, looking at them rather +wistfully. "I'd best go and talk to the hermit,"--and so he strolled +off out of the hum of men, and noise, and clatter of the banquet, into +the dark walk, at the end of which lived that well-known pasteboard +Solitary. It wasn't very good fun for Dobbin--and, indeed, to be alone +at Vauxhall, I have found, from my own experience, to be one of the +most dismal sports ever entered into by a bachelor. + +The two couples were perfectly happy then in their box: where the most +delightful and intimate conversation took place. Jos was in his glory, +ordering about the waiters with great majesty. He made the salad; and +uncorked the Champagne; and carved the chickens; and ate and drank the +greater part of the refreshments on the tables. Finally, he insisted +upon having a bowl of rack punch; everybody had rack punch at Vauxhall. +"Waiter, rack punch." + +That bowl of rack punch was the cause of all this history. And why not +a bowl of rack punch as well as any other cause? Was not a bowl of +prussic acid the cause of Fair Rosamond's retiring from the world? Was +not a bowl of wine the cause of the demise of Alexander the Great, or, +at least, does not Dr. Lempriere say so?--so did this bowl of rack +punch influence the fates of all the principal characters in this +"Novel without a Hero," which we are now relating. It influenced their +life, although most of them did not taste a drop of it. + +The young ladies did not drink it; Osborne did not like it; and the +consequence was that Jos, that fat gourmand, drank up the whole +contents of the bowl; and the consequence of his drinking up the whole +contents of the bowl was a liveliness which at first was astonishing, +and then became almost painful; for he talked and laughed so loud as to +bring scores of listeners round the box, much to the confusion of the +innocent party within it; and, volunteering to sing a song (which he +did in that maudlin high key peculiar to gentlemen in an inebriated +state), he almost drew away the audience who were gathered round the +musicians in the gilt scollop-shell, and received from his hearers a +great deal of applause. + +"Brayvo, Fat un!" said one; "Angcore, Daniel Lambert!" said another; +"What a figure for the tight-rope!" exclaimed another wag, to the +inexpressible alarm of the ladies, and the great anger of Mr. Osborne. + +"For Heaven's sake, Jos, let us get up and go," cried that gentleman, +and the young women rose. + +"Stop, my dearest diddle-diddle-darling," shouted Jos, now as bold as a +lion, and clasping Miss Rebecca round the waist. Rebecca started, but +she could not get away her hand. The laughter outside redoubled. Jos +continued to drink, to make love, and to sing; and, winking and waving +his glass gracefully to his audience, challenged all or any to come in +and take a share of his punch. + +Mr. Osborne was just on the point of knocking down a gentleman in +top-boots, who proposed to take advantage of this invitation, and a +commotion seemed to be inevitable, when by the greatest good luck a +gentleman of the name of Dobbin, who had been walking about the +gardens, stepped up to the box. "Be off, you fools!" said this +gentleman--shouldering off a great number of the crowd, who vanished +presently before his cocked hat and fierce appearance--and he entered +the box in a most agitated state. + +"Good Heavens! Dobbin, where have you been?" Osborne said, seizing the +white cashmere shawl from his friend's arm, and huddling up Amelia in +it.--"Make yourself useful, and take charge of Jos here, whilst I take +the ladies to the carriage." + +Jos was for rising to interfere--but a single push from Osborne's +finger sent him puffing back into his seat again, and the lieutenant +was enabled to remove the ladies in safety. Jos kissed his hand to +them as they retreated, and hiccupped out "Bless you! Bless you!" Then, +seizing Captain Dobbin's hand, and weeping in the most pitiful way, he +confided to that gentleman the secret of his loves. He adored that +girl who had just gone out; he had broken her heart, he knew he had, by +his conduct; he would marry her next morning at St. George's, Hanover +Square; he'd knock up the Archbishop of Canterbury at Lambeth: he +would, by Jove! and have him in readiness; and, acting on this hint, +Captain Dobbin shrewdly induced him to leave the gardens and hasten to +Lambeth Palace, and, when once out of the gates, easily conveyed Mr. +Jos Sedley into a hackney-coach, which deposited him safely at his +lodgings. + +George Osborne conducted the girls home in safety: and when the door +was closed upon them, and as he walked across Russell Square, laughed +so as to astonish the watchman. Amelia looked very ruefully at her +friend, as they went up stairs, and kissed her, and went to bed without +any more talking. + +"He must propose to-morrow," thought Rebecca. "He called me his soul's +darling, four times; he squeezed my hand in Amelia's presence. He must +propose to-morrow." And so thought Amelia, too. And I dare say she +thought of the dress she was to wear as bridesmaid, and of the presents +which she should make to her nice little sister-in-law, and of a +subsequent ceremony in which she herself might play a principal part, +&c., and &c., and &c., and &c. + +Oh, ignorant young creatures! How little do you know the effect of rack +punch! What is the rack in the punch, at night, to the rack in the head +of a morning? To this truth I can vouch as a man; there is no headache +in the world like that caused by Vauxhall punch. Through the lapse of +twenty years, I can remember the consequence of two glasses! two +wine-glasses! but two, upon the honour of a gentleman; and Joseph +Sedley, who had a liver complaint, had swallowed at least a quart of +the abominable mixture. + +That next morning, which Rebecca thought was to dawn upon her fortune, +found Sedley groaning in agonies which the pen refuses to describe. +Soda-water was not invented yet. Small beer--will it be believed!--was +the only drink with which unhappy gentlemen soothed the fever of their +previous night's potation. With this mild beverage before him, George +Osborne found the ex-Collector of Boggley Wollah groaning on the sofa +at his lodgings. Dobbin was already in the room, good-naturedly +tending his patient of the night before. The two officers, looking at +the prostrate Bacchanalian, and askance at each other, exchanged the +most frightful sympathetic grins. Even Sedley's valet, the most solemn +and correct of gentlemen, with the muteness and gravity of an +undertaker, could hardly keep his countenance in order, as he looked at +his unfortunate master. + +"Mr. Sedley was uncommon wild last night, sir," he whispered in +confidence to Osborne, as the latter mounted the stair. "He wanted to +fight the 'ackney-coachman, sir. The Capting was obliged to bring him +upstairs in his harms like a babby." A momentary smile flickered over +Mr. Brush's features as he spoke; instantly, however, they relapsed +into their usual unfathomable calm, as he flung open the drawing-room +door, and announced "Mr. Hosbin." + +"How are you, Sedley?" that young wag began, after surveying his +victim. "No bones broke? There's a hackney-coachman downstairs with a +black eye, and a tied-up head, vowing he'll have the law of you." + +"What do you mean--law?" Sedley faintly asked. + +"For thrashing him last night--didn't he, Dobbin? You hit out, sir, +like Molyneux. The watchman says he never saw a fellow go down so +straight. Ask Dobbin." + +"You DID have a round with the coachman," Captain Dobbin said, "and +showed plenty of fight too." + +"And that fellow with the white coat at Vauxhall! How Jos drove at him! +How the women screamed! By Jove, sir, it did my heart good to see you. +I thought you civilians had no pluck; but I'll never get in your way +when you are in your cups, Jos." + +"I believe I'm very terrible, when I'm roused," ejaculated Jos from the +sofa, and made a grimace so dreary and ludicrous, that the Captain's +politeness could restrain him no longer, and he and Osborne fired off a +ringing volley of laughter. + +Osborne pursued his advantage pitilessly. He thought Jos a milksop. He +had been revolving in his mind the marriage question pending between +Jos and Rebecca, and was not over well pleased that a member of a +family into which he, George Osborne, of the --th, was going to marry, +should make a mesalliance with a little nobody--a little upstart +governess. "You hit, you poor old fellow!" said Osborne. "You +terrible! Why, man, you couldn't stand--you made everybody laugh in the +Gardens, though you were crying yourself. You were maudlin, Jos. +Don't you remember singing a song?" + +"A what?" Jos asked. + +"A sentimental song, and calling Rosa, Rebecca, what's her name, +Amelia's little friend--your dearest diddle-diddle-darling?" And this +ruthless young fellow, seizing hold of Dobbin's hand, acted over the +scene, to the horror of the original performer, and in spite of +Dobbin's good-natured entreaties to him to have mercy. + +"Why should I spare him?" Osborne said to his friend's remonstrances, +when they quitted the invalid, leaving him under the hands of Doctor +Gollop. "What the deuce right has he to give himself his patronizing +airs, and make fools of us at Vauxhall? Who's this little schoolgirl +that is ogling and making love to him? Hang it, the family's low enough +already, without HER. A governess is all very well, but I'd rather +have a lady for my sister-in-law. I'm a liberal man; but I've proper +pride, and know my own station: let her know hers. And I'll take down +that great hectoring Nabob, and prevent him from being made a greater +fool than he is. That's why I told him to look out, lest she brought +an action against him." + +"I suppose you know best," Dobbin said, though rather dubiously. "You +always were a Tory, and your family's one of the oldest in England. +But--" + +"Come and see the girls, and make love to Miss Sharp yourself," the +lieutenant here interrupted his friend; but Captain Dobbin declined to +join Osborne in his daily visit to the young ladies in Russell Square. + +As George walked down Southampton Row, from Holborn, he laughed as he +saw, at the Sedley Mansion, in two different stories two heads on the +look-out. + +The fact is, Miss Amelia, in the drawing-room balcony, was looking very +eagerly towards the opposite side of the Square, where Mr. Osborne +dwelt, on the watch for the lieutenant himself; and Miss Sharp, from +her little bed-room on the second floor, was in observation until Mr. +Joseph's great form should heave in sight. + +"Sister Anne is on the watch-tower," said he to Amelia, "but there's +nobody coming"; and laughing and enjoying the joke hugely, he described +in the most ludicrous terms to Miss Sedley, the dismal condition of her +brother. + +"I think it's very cruel of you to laugh, George," she said, looking +particularly unhappy; but George only laughed the more at her piteous +and discomfited mien, persisted in thinking the joke a most diverting +one, and when Miss Sharp came downstairs, bantered her with a great +deal of liveliness upon the effect of her charms on the fat civilian. + +"O Miss Sharp! if you could but see him this morning," he +said--"moaning in his flowered dressing-gown--writhing on his sofa; if +you could but have seen him lolling out his tongue to Gollop the +apothecary." + +"See whom?" said Miss Sharp. + +"Whom? O whom? Captain Dobbin, of course, to whom we were all so +attentive, by the way, last night." + +"We were very unkind to him," Emmy said, blushing very much. "I--I +quite forgot him." + +"Of course you did," cried Osborne, still on the laugh. + +"One can't be ALWAYS thinking about Dobbin, you know, Amelia. Can one, +Miss Sharp?" + +"Except when he overset the glass of wine at dinner," Miss Sharp said, +with a haughty air and a toss of the head, "I never gave the existence +of Captain Dobbin one single moment's consideration." + +"Very good, Miss Sharp, I'll tell him," Osborne said; and as he spoke +Miss Sharp began to have a feeling of distrust and hatred towards this +young officer, which he was quite unconscious of having inspired. "He +is to make fun of me, is he?" thought Rebecca. "Has he been laughing +about me to Joseph? Has he frightened him? Perhaps he won't come."--A +film passed over her eyes, and her heart beat quite quick. + +"You're always joking," said she, smiling as innocently as she could. +"Joke away, Mr. George; there's nobody to defend ME." And George +Osborne, as she walked away--and Amelia looked reprovingly at him--felt +some little manly compunction for having inflicted any unnecessary +unkindness upon this helpless creature. "My dearest Amelia," said he, +"you are too good--too kind. You don't know the world. I do. And +your little friend Miss Sharp must learn her station." + +"Don't you think Jos will--" + +"Upon my word, my dear, I don't know. He may, or may not. I'm not his +master. I only know he is a very foolish vain fellow, and put my dear +little girl into a very painful and awkward position last night. My +dearest diddle-diddle-darling!" He was off laughing again, and he did +it so drolly that Emmy laughed too. + +All that day Jos never came. But Amelia had no fear about this; for +the little schemer had actually sent away the page, Mr. Sambo's +aide-de-camp, to Mr. Joseph's lodgings, to ask for some book he had +promised, and how he was; and the reply through Jos's man, Mr. Brush, +was, that his master was ill in bed, and had just had the doctor with +him. He must come to-morrow, she thought, but she never had the +courage to speak a word on the subject to Rebecca; nor did that young +woman herself allude to it in any way during the whole evening after +the night at Vauxhall. + +The next day, however, as the two young ladies sate on the sofa, +pretending to work, or to write letters, or to read novels, Sambo came +into the room with his usual engaging grin, with a packet under his +arm, and a note on a tray. "Note from Mr. Jos, Miss," says Sambo. + +How Amelia trembled as she opened it! + +So it ran: + +Dear Amelia,--I send you the "Orphan of the Forest." I was too ill to +come yesterday. I leave town to-day for Cheltenham. Pray excuse me, +if you can, to the amiable Miss Sharp, for my conduct at Vauxhall, and +entreat her to pardon and forget every word I may have uttered when +excited by that fatal supper. As soon as I have recovered, for my +health is very much shaken, I shall go to Scotland for some months, and +am + +Truly yours, Jos Sedley + +It was the death-warrant. All was over. Amelia did not dare to look +at Rebecca's pale face and burning eyes, but she dropt the letter into +her friend's lap; and got up, and went upstairs to her room, and cried +her little heart out. + +Blenkinsop, the housekeeper, there sought her presently with +consolation, on whose shoulder Amelia wept confidentially, and relieved +herself a good deal. "Don't take on, Miss. I didn't like to tell you. +But none of us in the house have liked her except at fust. I sor her +with my own eyes reading your Ma's letters. Pinner says she's always +about your trinket-box and drawers, and everybody's drawers, and she's +sure she's put your white ribbing into her box." + +"I gave it her, I gave it her," Amelia said. + +But this did not alter Mrs. Blenkinsop's opinion of Miss Sharp. "I +don't trust them governesses, Pinner," she remarked to the maid. "They +give themselves the hairs and hupstarts of ladies, and their wages is +no better than you nor me." + +It now became clear to every soul in the house, except poor Amelia, +that Rebecca should take her departure, and high and low (always with +the one exception) agreed that that event should take place as speedily +as possible. Our good child ransacked all her drawers, cupboards, +reticules, and gimcrack boxes--passed in review all her gowns, fichus, +tags, bobbins, laces, silk stockings, and fallals--selecting this thing +and that and the other, to make a little heap for Rebecca. And going +to her Papa, that generous British merchant, who had promised to give +her as many guineas as she was years old--she begged the old gentleman +to give the money to dear Rebecca, who must want it, while she lacked +for nothing. + +She even made George Osborne contribute, and nothing loth (for he was +as free-handed a young fellow as any in the army), he went to Bond +Street, and bought the best hat and spenser that money could buy. + +"That's George's present to you, Rebecca, dear," said Amelia, quite +proud of the bandbox conveying these gifts. "What a taste he has! +There's nobody like him." + +"Nobody," Rebecca answered. "How thankful I am to him!" She was +thinking in her heart, "It was George Osborne who prevented my +marriage."--And she loved George Osborne accordingly. + +She made her preparations for departure with great equanimity; and +accepted all the kind little Amelia's presents, after just the proper +degree of hesitation and reluctance. She vowed eternal gratitude to +Mrs. Sedley, of course; but did not intrude herself upon that good lady +too much, who was embarrassed, and evidently wishing to avoid her. She +kissed Mr. Sedley's hand, when he presented her with the purse; and +asked permission to consider him for the future as her kind, kind +friend and protector. Her behaviour was so affecting that he was going +to write her a cheque for twenty pounds more; but he restrained his +feelings: the carriage was in waiting to take him to dinner, so he +tripped away with a "God bless you, my dear, always come here when you +come to town, you know.--Drive to the Mansion House, James." + +Finally came the parting with Miss Amelia, over which picture I intend +to throw a veil. But after a scene in which one person was in earnest +and the other a perfect performer--after the tenderest caresses, the +most pathetic tears, the smelling-bottle, and some of the very best +feelings of the heart, had been called into requisition--Rebecca and +Amelia parted, the former vowing to love her friend for ever and ever +and ever. + + + +CHAPTER VII + +Crawley of Queen's Crawley + +Among the most respected of the names beginning in C which the +Court-Guide contained, in the year 18--, was that of Crawley, Sir Pitt, +Baronet, Great Gaunt Street, and Queen's Crawley, Hants. This +honourable name had figured constantly also in the Parliamentary list +for many years, in conjunction with that of a number of other worthy +gentlemen who sat in turns for the borough. + +It is related, with regard to the borough of Queen's Crawley, that +Queen Elizabeth in one of her progresses, stopping at Crawley to +breakfast, was so delighted with some remarkably fine Hampshire beer +which was then presented to her by the Crawley of the day (a handsome +gentleman with a trim beard and a good leg), that she forthwith erected +Crawley into a borough to send two members to Parliament; and the +place, from the day of that illustrious visit, took the name of Queen's +Crawley, which it holds up to the present moment. And though, by the +lapse of time, and those mutations which age produces in empires, +cities, and boroughs, Queen's Crawley was no longer so populous a place +as it had been in Queen Bess's time--nay, was come down to that +condition of borough which used to be denominated rotten--yet, as Sir +Pitt Crawley would say with perfect justice in his elegant way, +"Rotten! be hanged--it produces me a good fifteen hundred a year." + +Sir Pitt Crawley (named after the great Commoner) was the son of +Walpole Crawley, first Baronet, of the Tape and Sealing-Wax Office in +the reign of George II., when he was impeached for peculation, as were +a great number of other honest gentlemen of those days; and Walpole +Crawley was, as need scarcely be said, son of John Churchill Crawley, +named after the celebrated military commander of the reign of Queen +Anne. The family tree (which hangs up at Queen's Crawley) furthermore +mentions Charles Stuart, afterwards called Barebones Crawley, son of +the Crawley of James the First's time; and finally, Queen Elizabeth's +Crawley, who is represented as the foreground of the picture in his +forked beard and armour. Out of his waistcoat, as usual, grows a tree, +on the main branches of which the above illustrious names are +inscribed. Close by the name of Sir Pitt Crawley, Baronet (the subject +of the present memoir), are written that of his brother, the Reverend +Bute Crawley (the great Commoner was in disgrace when the reverend +gentleman was born), rector of Crawley-cum-Snailby, and of various +other male and female members of the Crawley family. + +Sir Pitt was first married to Grizzel, sixth daughter of Mungo Binkie, +Lord Binkie, and cousin, in consequence, of Mr. Dundas. She brought +him two sons: Pitt, named not so much after his father as after the +heaven-born minister; and Rawdon Crawley, from the Prince of Wales's +friend, whom his Majesty George IV forgot so completely. Many years +after her ladyship's demise, Sir Pitt led to the altar Rosa, daughter +of Mr. G. Dawson, of Mudbury, by whom he had two daughters, for whose +benefit Miss Rebecca Sharp was now engaged as governess. It will be +seen that the young lady was come into a family of very genteel +connexions, and was about to move in a much more distinguished circle +than that humble one which she had just quitted in Russell Square. + +She had received her orders to join her pupils, in a note which was +written upon an old envelope, and which contained the following words: + +Sir Pitt Crawley begs Miss Sharp and baggidge may be hear on Tuesday, +as I leaf for Queen's Crawley to-morrow morning ERLY. + +Great Gaunt Street. + +Rebecca had never seen a Baronet, as far as she knew, and as soon as +she had taken leave of Amelia, and counted the guineas which +good-natured Mr. Sedley had put into a purse for her, and as soon as +she had done wiping her eyes with her handkerchief (which operation she +concluded the very moment the carriage had turned the corner of the +street), she began to depict in her own mind what a Baronet must be. "I +wonder, does he wear a star?" thought she, "or is it only lords that +wear stars? But he will be very handsomely dressed in a court suit, +with ruffles, and his hair a little powdered, like Mr. Wroughton at +Covent Garden. I suppose he will be awfully proud, and that I shall be +treated most contemptuously. Still I must bear my hard lot as well as +I can--at least, I shall be amongst GENTLEFOLKS, and not with vulgar +city people": and she fell to thinking of her Russell Square friends +with that very same philosophical bitterness with which, in a certain +apologue, the fox is represented as speaking of the grapes. + +Having passed through Gaunt Square into Great Gaunt Street, the +carriage at length stopped at a tall gloomy house between two other +tall gloomy houses, each with a hatchment over the middle drawing-room +window; as is the custom of houses in Great Gaunt Street, in which +gloomy locality death seems to reign perpetual. The shutters of the +first-floor windows of Sir Pitt's mansion were closed--those of the +dining-room were partially open, and the blinds neatly covered up in +old newspapers. + +John, the groom, who had driven the carriage alone, did not care to +descend to ring the bell; and so prayed a passing milk-boy to perform +that office for him. When the bell was rung, a head appeared between +the interstices of the dining-room shutters, and the door was opened by +a man in drab breeches and gaiters, with a dirty old coat, a foul old +neckcloth lashed round his bristly neck, a shining bald head, a leering +red face, a pair of twinkling grey eyes, and a mouth perpetually on the +grin. + +"This Sir Pitt Crawley's?" says John, from the box. + +"Ees," says the man at the door, with a nod. + +"Hand down these 'ere trunks then," said John. + +"Hand 'n down yourself," said the porter. + +"Don't you see I can't leave my hosses? Come, bear a hand, my fine +feller, and Miss will give you some beer," said John, with a +horse-laugh, for he was no longer respectful to Miss Sharp, as her +connexion with the family was broken off, and as she had given nothing +to the servants on coming away. + +The bald-headed man, taking his hands out of his breeches pockets, +advanced on this summons, and throwing Miss Sharp's trunk over his +shoulder, carried it into the house. + +"Take this basket and shawl, if you please, and open the door," said +Miss Sharp, and descended from the carriage in much indignation. "I +shall write to Mr. Sedley and inform him of your conduct," said she to +the groom. + +"Don't," replied that functionary. "I hope you've forgot nothink? Miss +'Melia's gownds--have you got them--as the lady's maid was to have 'ad? +I hope they'll fit you. Shut the door, Jim, you'll get no good out of +'ER," continued John, pointing with his thumb towards Miss Sharp: "a +bad lot, I tell you, a bad lot," and so saying, Mr. Sedley's groom +drove away. The truth is, he was attached to the lady's maid in +question, and indignant that she should have been robbed of her +perquisites. + +On entering the dining-room, by the orders of the individual in +gaiters, Rebecca found that apartment not more cheerful than such rooms +usually are, when genteel families are out of town. The faithful +chambers seem, as it were, to mourn the absence of their masters. The +turkey carpet has rolled itself up, and retired sulkily under the +sideboard: the pictures have hidden their faces behind old sheets of +brown paper: the ceiling lamp is muffled up in a dismal sack of brown +holland: the window-curtains have disappeared under all sorts of shabby +envelopes: the marble bust of Sir Walpole Crawley is looking from its +black corner at the bare boards and the oiled fire-irons, and the empty +card-racks over the mantelpiece: the cellaret has lurked away behind +the carpet: the chairs are turned up heads and tails along the walls: +and in the dark corner opposite the statue, is an old-fashioned crabbed +knife-box, locked and sitting on a dumb waiter. + +Two kitchen chairs, and a round table, and an attenuated old poker and +tongs were, however, gathered round the fire-place, as was a saucepan +over a feeble sputtering fire. There was a bit of cheese and bread, +and a tin candlestick on the table, and a little black porter in a +pint-pot. + +"Had your dinner, I suppose? It is not too warm for you? Like a drop of +beer?" + +"Where is Sir Pitt Crawley?" said Miss Sharp majestically. + +"He, he! I'm Sir Pitt Crawley. Reklect you owe me a pint for bringing +down your luggage. He, he! Ask Tinker if I aynt. Mrs. Tinker, Miss +Sharp; Miss Governess, Mrs. Charwoman. Ho, ho!" + +The lady addressed as Mrs. Tinker at this moment made her appearance +with a pipe and a paper of tobacco, for which she had been despatched a +minute before Miss Sharp's arrival; and she handed the articles over to +Sir Pitt, who had taken his seat by the fire. + +"Where's the farden?" said he. "I gave you three halfpence. Where's +the change, old Tinker?" + +"There!" replied Mrs. Tinker, flinging down the coin; "it's only +baronets as cares about farthings." + +"A farthing a day is seven shillings a year," answered the M.P.; "seven +shillings a year is the interest of seven guineas. Take care of your +farthings, old Tinker, and your guineas will come quite nat'ral." + +"You may be sure it's Sir Pitt Crawley, young woman," said Mrs. Tinker, +surlily; "because he looks to his farthings. You'll know him better +afore long." + +"And like me none the worse, Miss Sharp," said the old gentleman, with +an air almost of politeness. "I must be just before I'm generous." + +"He never gave away a farthing in his life," growled Tinker. + +"Never, and never will: it's against my principle. Go and get another +chair from the kitchen, Tinker, if you want to sit down; and then we'll +have a bit of supper." + +Presently the baronet plunged a fork into the saucepan on the fire, and +withdrew from the pot a piece of tripe and an onion, which he divided +into pretty equal portions, and of which he partook with Mrs. Tinker. +"You see, Miss Sharp, when I'm not here Tinker's on board wages: when +I'm in town she dines with the family. Haw! haw! I'm glad Miss Sharp's +not hungry, ain't you, Tink?" And they fell to upon their frugal supper. + +After supper Sir Pitt Crawley began to smoke his pipe; and when it +became quite dark, he lighted the rushlight in the tin candlestick, and +producing from an interminable pocket a huge mass of papers, began +reading them, and putting them in order. + +"I'm here on law business, my dear, and that's how it happens that I +shall have the pleasure of such a pretty travelling companion +to-morrow." + +"He's always at law business," said Mrs. Tinker, taking up the pot of +porter. + +"Drink and drink about," said the Baronet. "Yes; my dear, Tinker is +quite right: I've lost and won more lawsuits than any man in England. +Look here at Crawley, Bart. v. Snaffle. I'll throw him over, or my +name's not Pitt Crawley. Podder and another versus Crawley, Bart. +Overseers of Snaily parish against Crawley, Bart. They can't prove it's +common: I'll defy 'em; the land's mine. It no more belongs to the +parish than it does to you or Tinker here. I'll beat 'em, if it cost +me a thousand guineas. Look over the papers; you may if you like, my +dear. Do you write a good hand? I'll make you useful when we're at +Queen's Crawley, depend on it, Miss Sharp. Now the dowager's dead I +want some one." + +"She was as bad as he," said Tinker. "She took the law of every one of +her tradesmen; and turned away forty-eight footmen in four year." + +"She was close--very close," said the Baronet, simply; "but she was a +valyble woman to me, and saved me a steward."--And in this confidential +strain, and much to the amusement of the new-comer, the conversation +continued for a considerable time. Whatever Sir Pitt Crawley's +qualities might be, good or bad, he did not make the least disguise of +them. He talked of himself incessantly, sometimes in the coarsest and +vulgarest Hampshire accent; sometimes adopting the tone of a man of the +world. And so, with injunctions to Miss Sharp to be ready at five in +the morning, he bade her good night. "You'll sleep with Tinker +to-night," he said; "it's a big bed, and there's room for two. Lady +Crawley died in it. Good night." + +Sir Pitt went off after this benediction, and the solemn Tinker, +rushlight in hand, led the way up the great bleak stone stairs, past +the great dreary drawing-room doors, with the handles muffled up in +paper, into the great front bedroom, where Lady Crawley had slept her +last. The bed and chamber were so funereal and gloomy, you might have +fancied, not only that Lady Crawley died in the room, but that her +ghost inhabited it. Rebecca sprang about the apartment, however, with +the greatest liveliness, and had peeped into the huge wardrobes, and +the closets, and the cupboards, and tried the drawers which were +locked, and examined the dreary pictures and toilette appointments, +while the old charwoman was saying her prayers. "I shouldn't like to +sleep in this yeer bed without a good conscience, Miss," said the old +woman. "There's room for us and a half-dozen of ghosts in it," says +Rebecca. "Tell me all about Lady Crawley and Sir Pitt Crawley, and +everybody, my DEAR Mrs. Tinker." + +But old Tinker was not to be pumped by this little cross-questioner; +and signifying to her that bed was a place for sleeping, not +conversation, set up in her corner of the bed such a snore as only the +nose of innocence can produce. Rebecca lay awake for a long, long +time, thinking of the morrow, and of the new world into which she was +going, and of her chances of success there. The rushlight flickered in +the basin. The mantelpiece cast up a great black shadow, over half of +a mouldy old sampler, which her defunct ladyship had worked, no doubt, +and over two little family pictures of young lads, one in a college +gown, and the other in a red jacket like a soldier. When she went to +sleep, Rebecca chose that one to dream about. + +At four o'clock, on such a roseate summer's morning as even made Great +Gaunt Street look cheerful, the faithful Tinker, having wakened her +bedfellow, and bid her prepare for departure, unbarred and unbolted the +great hall door (the clanging and clapping whereof startled the +sleeping echoes in the street), and taking her way into Oxford Street, +summoned a coach from a stand there. It is needless to particularize +the number of the vehicle, or to state that the driver was stationed +thus early in the neighbourhood of Swallow Street, in hopes that some +young buck, reeling homeward from the tavern, might need the aid of his +vehicle, and pay him with the generosity of intoxication. + +It is likewise needless to say that the driver, if he had any such +hopes as those above stated, was grossly disappointed; and that the +worthy Baronet whom he drove to the City did not give him one single +penny more than his fare. It was in vain that Jehu appealed and +stormed; that he flung down Miss Sharp's bandboxes in the gutter at the +'Necks, and swore he would take the law of his fare. + +"You'd better not," said one of the ostlers; "it's Sir Pitt Crawley." + +"So it is, Joe," cried the Baronet, approvingly; "and I'd like to see +the man can do me." + +"So should oi," said Joe, grinning sulkily, and mounting the Baronet's +baggage on the roof of the coach. + +"Keep the box for me, Leader," exclaims the Member of Parliament to the +coachman; who replied, "Yes, Sir Pitt," with a touch of his hat, and +rage in his soul (for he had promised the box to a young gentleman from +Cambridge, who would have given a crown to a certainty), and Miss Sharp +was accommodated with a back seat inside the carriage, which might be +said to be carrying her into the wide world. + +How the young man from Cambridge sulkily put his five great-coats in +front; but was reconciled when little Miss Sharp was made to quit the +carriage, and mount up beside him--when he covered her up in one of his +Benjamins, and became perfectly good-humoured--how the asthmatic +gentleman, the prim lady, who declared upon her sacred honour she had +never travelled in a public carriage before (there is always such a +lady in a coach--Alas! was; for the coaches, where are they?), and the +fat widow with the brandy-bottle, took their places inside--how the +porter asked them all for money, and got sixpence from the gentleman +and five greasy halfpence from the fat widow--and how the carriage at +length drove away--now threading the dark lanes of Aldersgate, anon +clattering by the Blue Cupola of St. Paul's, jingling rapidly by the +strangers' entry of Fleet-Market, which, with Exeter 'Change, has now +departed to the world of shadows--how they passed the White Bear in +Piccadilly, and saw the dew rising up from the market-gardens of +Knightsbridge--how Turnhamgreen, Brentwood, Bagshot, were passed--need +not be told here. But the writer of these pages, who has pursued in +former days, and in the same bright weather, the same remarkable +journey, cannot but think of it with a sweet and tender regret. Where +is the road now, and its merry incidents of life? Is there no Chelsea +or Greenwich for the old honest pimple-nosed coachmen? I wonder where +are they, those good fellows? Is old Weller alive or dead? and the +waiters, yea, and the inns at which they waited, and the cold rounds of +beef inside, and the stunted ostler, with his blue nose and clinking +pail, where is he, and where is his generation? To those great +geniuses now in petticoats, who shall write novels for the beloved +reader's children, these men and things will be as much legend and +history as Nineveh, or Coeur de Lion, or Jack Sheppard. For them +stage-coaches will have become romances--a team of four bays as +fabulous as Bucephalus or Black Bess. Ah, how their coats shone, as +the stable-men pulled their clothes off, and away they went--ah, how +their tails shook, as with smoking sides at the stage's end they +demurely walked away into the inn-yard. Alas! we shall never hear the +horn sing at midnight, or see the pike-gates fly open any more. +Whither, however, is the light four-inside Trafalgar coach carrying us? +Let us be set down at Queen's Crawley without further divagation, and +see how Miss Rebecca Sharp speeds there. + + + +CHAPTER VIII + +Private and Confidential + +Miss Rebecca Sharp to Miss Amelia Sedley, Russell Square, London. +(Free.--Pitt Crawley.) + +MY DEAREST, SWEETEST AMELIA, + +With what mingled joy and sorrow do I take up the pen to write to my +dearest friend! Oh, what a change between to-day and yesterday! Now I +am friendless and alone; yesterday I was at home, in the sweet company +of a sister, whom I shall ever, ever cherish! + +I will not tell you in what tears and sadness I passed the fatal night +in which I separated from you. YOU went on Tuesday to joy and +happiness, with your mother and YOUR DEVOTED YOUNG SOLDIER by your +side; and I thought of you all night, dancing at the Perkins's, the +prettiest, I am sure, of all the young ladies at the Ball. I was +brought by the groom in the old carriage to Sir Pitt Crawley's town +house, where, after John the groom had behaved most rudely and +insolently to me (alas! 'twas safe to insult poverty and misfortune!), +I was given over to Sir P.'s care, and made to pass the night in an old +gloomy bed, and by the side of a horrid gloomy old charwoman, who keeps +the house. I did not sleep one single wink the whole night. + +Sir Pitt is not what we silly girls, when we used to read Cecilia at +Chiswick, imagined a baronet must have been. Anything, indeed, less +like Lord Orville cannot be imagined. Fancy an old, stumpy, short, +vulgar, and very dirty man, in old clothes and shabby old gaiters, who +smokes a horrid pipe, and cooks his own horrid supper in a saucepan. +He speaks with a country accent, and swore a great deal at the old +charwoman, at the hackney coachman who drove us to the inn where the +coach went from, and on which I made the journey OUTSIDE FOR THE +GREATER PART OF THE WAY. + +I was awakened at daybreak by the charwoman, and having arrived at the +inn, was at first placed inside the coach. But, when we got to a place +called Leakington, where the rain began to fall very heavily--will you +believe it?--I was forced to come outside; for Sir Pitt is a proprietor +of the coach, and as a passenger came at Mudbury, who wanted an inside +place, I was obliged to go outside in the rain, where, however, a young +gentleman from Cambridge College sheltered me very kindly in one of his +several great coats. + +This gentleman and the guard seemed to know Sir Pitt very well, and +laughed at him a great deal. They both agreed in calling him an old +screw; which means a very stingy, avaricious person. He never gives +any money to anybody, they said (and this meanness I hate); and the +young gentleman made me remark that we drove very slow for the last two +stages on the road, because Sir Pitt was on the box, and because he is +proprietor of the horses for this part of the journey. "But won't I +flog 'em on to Squashmore, when I take the ribbons?" said the young +Cantab. "And sarve 'em right, Master Jack," said the guard. When I +comprehended the meaning of this phrase, and that Master Jack intended +to drive the rest of the way, and revenge himself on Sir Pitt's horses, +of course I laughed too. + +A carriage and four splendid horses, covered with armorial bearings, +however, awaited us at Mudbury, four miles from Queen's Crawley, and we +made our entrance to the baronet's park in state. There is a fine +avenue of a mile long leading to the house, and the woman at the +lodge-gate (over the pillars of which are a serpent and a dove, the +supporters of the Crawley arms), made us a number of curtsies as she +flung open the old iron carved doors, which are something like those at +odious Chiswick. + +"There's an avenue," said Sir Pitt, "a mile long. There's six thousand +pound of timber in them there trees. Do you call that nothing?" He +pronounced avenue--EVENUE, and nothing--NOTHINK, so droll; and he had a +Mr. Hodson, his hind from Mudbury, into the carriage with him, and they +talked about distraining, and selling up, and draining and subsoiling, +and a great deal about tenants and farming--much more than I could +understand. Sam Miles had been caught poaching, and Peter Bailey had +gone to the workhouse at last. "Serve him right," said Sir Pitt; "him +and his family has been cheating me on that farm these hundred and +fifty years." Some old tenant, I suppose, who could not pay his rent. +Sir Pitt might have said "he and his family," to be sure; but rich +baronets do not need to be careful about grammar, as poor governesses +must be. + +As we passed, I remarked a beautiful church-spire rising above some old +elms in the park; and before them, in the midst of a lawn, and some +outhouses, an old red house with tall chimneys covered with ivy, and +the windows shining in the sun. "Is that your church, sir?" I said. + +"Yes, hang it," (said Sir Pitt, only he used, dear, A MUCH WICKEDER +WORD); "how's Buty, Hodson? Buty's my brother Bute, my dear--my brother +the parson. Buty and the Beast I call him, ha, ha!" + +Hodson laughed too, and then looking more grave and nodding his head, +said, "I'm afraid he's better, Sir Pitt. He was out on his pony +yesterday, looking at our corn." + +"Looking after his tithes, hang'un (only he used the same wicked word). +Will brandy and water never kill him? He's as tough as old +whatdyecallum--old Methusalem." + +Mr. Hodson laughed again. "The young men is home from college. They've +whopped John Scroggins till he's well nigh dead." + +"Whop my second keeper!" roared out Sir Pitt. + +"He was on the parson's ground, sir," replied Mr. Hodson; and Sir Pitt +in a fury swore that if he ever caught 'em poaching on his ground, he'd +transport 'em, by the lord he would. However, he said, "I've sold the +presentation of the living, Hodson; none of that breed shall get it, I +war'nt"; and Mr. Hodson said he was quite right: and I have no doubt +from this that the two brothers are at variance--as brothers often are, +and sisters too. Don't you remember the two Miss Scratchleys at +Chiswick, how they used always to fight and quarrel--and Mary Box, how +she was always thumping Louisa? + +Presently, seeing two little boys gathering sticks in the wood, Mr. +Hodson jumped out of the carriage, at Sir Pitt's order, and rushed upon +them with his whip. "Pitch into 'em, Hodson," roared the baronet; +"flog their little souls out, and bring 'em up to the house, the +vagabonds; I'll commit 'em as sure as my name's Pitt." And presently we +heard Mr. Hodson's whip cracking on the shoulders of the poor little +blubbering wretches, and Sir Pitt, seeing that the malefactors were in +custody, drove on to the hall. + +All the servants were ready to meet us, and . . . + +Here, my dear, I was interrupted last night by a dreadful thumping at +my door: and who do you think it was? Sir Pitt Crawley in his night-cap +and dressing-gown, such a figure! As I shrank away from such a visitor, +he came forward and seized my candle. "No candles after eleven +o'clock, Miss Becky," said he. "Go to bed in the dark, you pretty +little hussy" (that is what he called me), "and unless you wish me to +come for the candle every night, mind and be in bed at eleven." And +with this, he and Mr. Horrocks the butler went off laughing. You may +be sure I shall not encourage any more of their visits. They let loose +two immense bloodhounds at night, which all last night were yelling and +howling at the moon. "I call the dog Gorer," said Sir Pitt; "he's +killed a man that dog has, and is master of a bull, and the mother I +used to call Flora; but now I calls her Aroarer, for she's too old to +bite. Haw, haw!" + +Before the house of Queen's Crawley, which is an odious old-fashioned +red brick mansion, with tall chimneys and gables of the style of Queen +Bess, there is a terrace flanked by the family dove and serpent, and on +which the great hall-door opens. And oh, my dear, the great hall I am +sure is as big and as glum as the great hall in the dear castle of +Udolpho. It has a large fireplace, in which we might put half Miss +Pinkerton's school, and the grate is big enough to roast an ox at the +very least. Round the room hang I don't know how many generations of +Crawleys, some with beards and ruffs, some with huge wigs and toes +turned out, some dressed in long straight stays and gowns that look as +stiff as towers, and some with long ringlets, and oh, my dear! scarcely +any stays at all. At one end of the hall is the great staircase all in +black oak, as dismal as may be, and on either side are tall doors with +stags' heads over them, leading to the billiard-room and the library, +and the great yellow saloon and the morning-rooms. I think there are +at least twenty bedrooms on the first floor; one of them has the bed in +which Queen Elizabeth slept; and I have been taken by my new pupils +through all these fine apartments this morning. They are not rendered +less gloomy, I promise you, by having the shutters always shut; and +there is scarce one of the apartments, but when the light was let into +it, I expected to see a ghost in the room. We have a schoolroom on the +second floor, with my bedroom leading into it on one side, and that of +the young ladies on the other. Then there are Mr. Pitt's +apartments--Mr. Crawley, he is called--the eldest son, and Mr. Rawdon +Crawley's rooms--he is an officer like SOMEBODY, and away with his +regiment. There is no want of room I assure you. You might lodge all +the people in Russell Square in the house, I think, and have space to +spare. + +Half an hour after our arrival, the great dinner-bell was rung, and I +came down with my two pupils (they are very thin insignificant little +chits of ten and eight years old). I came down in your dear muslin +gown (about which that odious Mrs. Pinner was so rude, because you gave +it me); for I am to be treated as one of the family, except on company +days, when the young ladies and I are to dine upstairs. + +Well, the great dinner-bell rang, and we all assembled in the little +drawing-room where my Lady Crawley sits. She is the second Lady +Crawley, and mother of the young ladies. She was an ironmonger's +daughter, and her marriage was thought a great match. She looks as if +she had been handsome once, and her eyes are always weeping for the +loss of her beauty. She is pale and meagre and high-shouldered, and +has not a word to say for herself, evidently. Her stepson Mr. Crawley, +was likewise in the room. He was in full dress, as pompous as an +undertaker. He is pale, thin, ugly, silent; he has thin legs, no +chest, hay-coloured whiskers, and straw-coloured hair. He is the very +picture of his sainted mother over the mantelpiece--Griselda of the +noble house of Binkie. + +"This is the new governess, Mr. Crawley," said Lady Crawley, coming +forward and taking my hand. "Miss Sharp." + +"O!" said Mr. Crawley, and pushed his head once forward and began again +to read a great pamphlet with which he was busy. + +"I hope you will be kind to my girls," said Lady Crawley, with her pink +eyes always full of tears. + +"Law, Ma, of course she will," said the eldest: and I saw at a glance +that I need not be afraid of THAT woman. "My lady is served," says the +butler in black, in an immense white shirt-frill, that looked as if it +had been one of the Queen Elizabeth's ruffs depicted in the hall; and +so, taking Mr. Crawley's arm, she led the way to the dining-room, +whither I followed with my little pupils in each hand. + +Sir Pitt was already in the room with a silver jug. He had just been +to the cellar, and was in full dress too; that is, he had taken his +gaiters off, and showed his little dumpy legs in black worsted +stockings. The sideboard was covered with glistening old plate--old +cups, both gold and silver; old salvers and cruet-stands, like Rundell +and Bridge's shop. Everything on the table was in silver too, and two +footmen, with red hair and canary-coloured liveries, stood on either +side of the sideboard. + +Mr. Crawley said a long grace, and Sir Pitt said amen, and the great +silver dish-covers were removed. + +"What have we for dinner, Betsy?" said the Baronet. + +"Mutton broth, I believe, Sir Pitt," answered Lady Crawley. + +"Mouton aux navets," added the butler gravely (pronounce, if you +please, moutongonavvy); "and the soup is potage de mouton a +l'Ecossaise. The side-dishes contain pommes de terre au naturel, and +choufleur a l'eau." + +"Mutton's mutton," said the Baronet, "and a devilish good thing. What +SHIP was it, Horrocks, and when did you kill?" "One of the black-faced +Scotch, Sir Pitt: we killed on Thursday." + +"Who took any?" + +"Steel, of Mudbury, took the saddle and two legs, Sir Pitt; but he says +the last was too young and confounded woolly, Sir Pitt." + +"Will you take some potage, Miss ah--Miss Blunt? said Mr. Crawley. + +"Capital Scotch broth, my dear," said Sir Pitt, "though they call it by +a French name." + +"I believe it is the custom, sir, in decent society," said Mr. Crawley, +haughtily, "to call the dish as I have called it"; and it was served to +us on silver soup plates by the footmen in the canary coats, with the +mouton aux navets. Then "ale and water" were brought, and served to us +young ladies in wine-glasses. I am not a judge of ale, but I can say +with a clear conscience I prefer water. + +While we were enjoying our repast, Sir Pitt took occasion to ask what +had become of the shoulders of the mutton. + +"I believe they were eaten in the servants' hall," said my lady, humbly. + +"They was, my lady," said Horrocks, "and precious little else we get +there neither." + +Sir Pitt burst into a horse-laugh, and continued his conversation with +Mr. Horrocks. "That there little black pig of the Kent sow's breed +must be uncommon fat now." + +"It's not quite busting, Sir Pitt," said the butler with the gravest +air, at which Sir Pitt, and with him the young ladies, this time, began +to laugh violently. + +"Miss Crawley, Miss Rose Crawley," said Mr. Crawley, "your laughter +strikes me as being exceedingly out of place." + +"Never mind, my lord," said the Baronet, "we'll try the porker on +Saturday. Kill un on Saturday morning, John Horrocks. Miss Sharp +adores pork, don't you, Miss Sharp?" + +And I think this is all the conversation that I remember at dinner. +When the repast was concluded a jug of hot water was placed before Sir +Pitt, with a case-bottle containing, I believe, rum. Mr. Horrocks +served myself and my pupils with three little glasses of wine, and a +bumper was poured out for my lady. When we retired, she took from her +work-drawer an enormous interminable piece of knitting; the young +ladies began to play at cribbage with a dirty pack of cards. We had +but one candle lighted, but it was in a magnificent old silver +candlestick, and after a very few questions from my lady, I had my +choice of amusement between a volume of sermons, and a pamphlet on the +corn-laws, which Mr. Crawley had been reading before dinner. + +So we sat for an hour until steps were heard. + +"Put away the cards, girls," cried my lady, in a great tremor; "put +down Mr. Crawley's books, Miss Sharp"; and these orders had been +scarcely obeyed, when Mr. Crawley entered the room. + +"We will resume yesterday's discourse, young ladies," said he, "and you +shall each read a page by turns; so that Miss a--Miss Short may have an +opportunity of hearing you"; and the poor girls began to spell a long +dismal sermon delivered at Bethesda Chapel, Liverpool, on behalf of the +mission for the Chickasaw Indians. Was it not a charming evening? + +At ten the servants were told to call Sir Pitt and the household to +prayers. Sir Pitt came in first, very much flushed, and rather +unsteady in his gait; and after him the butler, the canaries, Mr. +Crawley's man, three other men, smelling very much of the stable, and +four women, one of whom, I remarked, was very much overdressed, and who +flung me a look of great scorn as she plumped down on her knees. + +After Mr. Crawley had done haranguing and expounding, we received our +candles, and then we went to bed; and then I was disturbed in my +writing, as I have described to my dearest sweetest Amelia. + +Good night. A thousand, thousand, thousand kisses! + +Saturday.--This morning, at five, I heard the shrieking of the little +black pig. Rose and Violet introduced me to it yesterday; and to the +stables, and to the kennel, and to the gardener, who was picking fruit +to send to market, and from whom they begged hard a bunch of hot-house +grapes; but he said that Sir Pitt had numbered every "Man Jack" of +them, and it would be as much as his place was worth to give any away. +The darling girls caught a colt in a paddock, and asked me if I would +ride, and began to ride themselves, when the groom, coming with horrid +oaths, drove them away. + +Lady Crawley is always knitting the worsted. Sir Pitt is always tipsy, +every night; and, I believe, sits with Horrocks, the butler. Mr. +Crawley always reads sermons in the evening, and in the morning is +locked up in his study, or else rides to Mudbury, on county business, +or to Squashmore, where he preaches, on Wednesdays and Fridays, to the +tenants there. + +A hundred thousand grateful loves to your dear papa and mamma. Is your +poor brother recovered of his rack-punch? Oh, dear! Oh, dear! How men +should beware of wicked punch! + +Ever and ever thine own REBECCA + +Everything considered, I think it is quite as well for our dear Amelia +Sedley, in Russell Square, that Miss Sharp and she are parted. Rebecca +is a droll funny creature, to be sure; and those descriptions of the +poor lady weeping for the loss of her beauty, and the gentleman "with +hay-coloured whiskers and straw-coloured hair," are very smart, +doubtless, and show a great knowledge of the world. That she might, +when on her knees, have been thinking of something better than Miss +Horrocks's ribbons, has possibly struck both of us. But my kind reader +will please to remember that this history has "Vanity Fair" for a +title, and that Vanity Fair is a very vain, wicked, foolish place, full +of all sorts of humbugs and falsenesses and pretensions. And while the +moralist, who is holding forth on the cover ( an accurate portrait of +your humble servant), professes to wear neither gown nor bands, but +only the very same long-eared livery in which his congregation is +arrayed: yet, look you, one is bound to speak the truth as far as one +knows it, whether one mounts a cap and bells or a shovel hat; and a +deal of disagreeable matter must come out in the course of such an +undertaking. + +I have heard a brother of the story-telling trade, at Naples, preaching +to a pack of good-for-nothing honest lazy fellows by the sea-shore, +work himself up into such a rage and passion with some of the villains +whose wicked deeds he was describing and inventing, that the audience +could not resist it; and they and the poet together would burst out +into a roar of oaths and execrations against the fictitious monster of +the tale, so that the hat went round, and the bajocchi tumbled into it, +in the midst of a perfect storm of sympathy. + +At the little Paris theatres, on the other hand, you will not only hear +the people yelling out "Ah gredin! Ah monstre:" and cursing the tyrant +of the play from the boxes; but the actors themselves positively refuse +to play the wicked parts, such as those of infames Anglais, brutal +Cossacks, and what not, and prefer to appear at a smaller salary, in +their real characters as loyal Frenchmen. I set the two stories one +against the other, so that you may see that it is not from mere +mercenary motives that the present performer is desirous to show up and +trounce his villains; but because he has a sincere hatred of them, +which he cannot keep down, and which must find a vent in suitable abuse +and bad language. + +I warn my "kyind friends," then, that I am going to tell a story of +harrowing villainy and complicated--but, as I trust, intensely +interesting--crime. My rascals are no milk-and-water rascals, I +promise you. When we come to the proper places we won't spare fine +language--No, no! But when we are going over the quiet country we must +perforce be calm. A tempest in a slop-basin is absurd. We will +reserve that sort of thing for the mighty ocean and the lonely +midnight. The present Chapter is very mild. Others--But we will not +anticipate THOSE. + +And, as we bring our characters forward, I will ask leave, as a man and +a brother, not only to introduce them, but occasionally to step down +from the platform, and talk about them: if they are good and kindly, to +love them and shake them by the hand: if they are silly, to laugh at +them confidentially in the reader's sleeve: if they are wicked and +heartless, to abuse them in the strongest terms which politeness admits +of. + +Otherwise you might fancy it was I who was sneering at the practice of +devotion, which Miss Sharp finds so ridiculous; that it was I who +laughed good-humouredly at the reeling old Silenus of a +baronet--whereas the laughter comes from one who has no reverence +except for prosperity, and no eye for anything beyond success. Such +people there are living and flourishing in the world--Faithless, +Hopeless, Charityless: let us have at them, dear friends, with might +and main. Some there are, and very successful too, mere quacks and +fools: and it was to combat and expose such as those, no doubt, that +Laughter was made. + + + +CHAPTER IX + +Family Portraits + +Sir Pitt Crawley was a philosopher with a taste for what is called low +life. His first marriage with the daughter of the noble Binkie had +been made under the auspices of his parents; and as he often told Lady +Crawley in her lifetime she was such a confounded quarrelsome high-bred +jade that when she died he was hanged if he would ever take another of +her sort, at her ladyship's demise he kept his promise, and selected +for a second wife Miss Rose Dawson, daughter of Mr. John Thomas Dawson, +ironmonger, of Mudbury. What a happy woman was Rose to be my Lady +Crawley! + +Let us set down the items of her happiness. In the first place, she +gave up Peter Butt, a young man who kept company with her, and in +consequence of his disappointment in love, took to smuggling, poaching, +and a thousand other bad courses. Then she quarrelled, as in duty +bound, with all the friends and intimates of her youth, who, of course, +could not be received by my Lady at Queen's Crawley--nor did she find +in her new rank and abode any persons who were willing to welcome her. +Who ever did? Sir Huddleston Fuddleston had three daughters who all +hoped to be Lady Crawley. Sir Giles Wapshot's family were insulted +that one of the Wapshot girls had not the preference in the marriage, +and the remaining baronets of the county were indignant at their +comrade's misalliance. Never mind the commoners, whom we will leave to +grumble anonymously. + +Sir Pitt did not care, as he said, a brass farden for any one of them. +He had his pretty Rose, and what more need a man require than to please +himself? So he used to get drunk every night: to beat his pretty Rose +sometimes: to leave her in Hampshire when he went to London for the +parliamentary session, without a single friend in the wide world. Even +Mrs. Bute Crawley, the Rector's wife, refused to visit her, as she said +she would never give the pas to a tradesman's daughter. + +As the only endowments with which Nature had gifted Lady Crawley were +those of pink cheeks and a white skin, and as she had no sort of +character, nor talents, nor opinions, nor occupations, nor amusements, +nor that vigour of soul and ferocity of temper which often falls to the +lot of entirely foolish women, her hold upon Sir Pitt's affections was +not very great. Her roses faded out of her cheeks, and the pretty +freshness left her figure after the birth of a couple of children, and +she became a mere machine in her husband's house of no more use than +the late Lady Crawley's grand piano. Being a light-complexioned woman, +she wore light clothes, as most blondes will, and appeared, in +preference, in draggled sea-green, or slatternly sky-blue. She worked +that worsted day and night, or other pieces like it. She had +counterpanes in the course of a few years to all the beds in Crawley. +She had a small flower-garden, for which she had rather an affection; +but beyond this no other like or disliking. When her husband was rude +to her she was apathetic: whenever he struck her she cried. She had +not character enough to take to drinking, and moaned about, slipshod +and in curl-papers all day. O Vanity Fair--Vanity Fair! This might +have been, but for you, a cheery lass--Peter Butt and Rose a happy man +and wife, in a snug farm, with a hearty family; and an honest portion +of pleasures, cares, hopes and struggles--but a title and a coach and +four are toys more precious than happiness in Vanity Fair: and if Harry +the Eighth or Bluebeard were alive now, and wanted a tenth wife, do you +suppose he could not get the prettiest girl that shall be presented +this season? + +The languid dulness of their mamma did not, as it may be supposed, +awaken much affection in her little daughters, but they were very happy +in the servants' hall and in the stables; and the Scotch gardener +having luckily a good wife and some good children, they got a little +wholesome society and instruction in his lodge, which was the only +education bestowed upon them until Miss Sharp came. + +Her engagement was owing to the remonstrances of Mr. Pitt Crawley, the +only friend or protector Lady Crawley ever had, and the only person, +besides her children, for whom she entertained a little feeble +attachment. Mr. Pitt took after the noble Binkies, from whom he was +descended, and was a very polite and proper gentleman. When he grew to +man's estate, and came back from Christchurch, he began to reform the +slackened discipline of the hall, in spite of his father, who stood in +awe of him. He was a man of such rigid refinement, that he would have +starved rather than have dined without a white neckcloth. Once, when +just from college, and when Horrocks the butler brought him a letter +without placing it previously on a tray, he gave that domestic a look, +and administered to him a speech so cutting, that Horrocks ever after +trembled before him; the whole household bowed to him: Lady Crawley's +curl-papers came off earlier when he was at home: Sir Pitt's muddy +gaiters disappeared; and if that incorrigible old man still adhered to +other old habits, he never fuddled himself with rum-and-water in his +son's presence, and only talked to his servants in a very reserved and +polite manner; and those persons remarked that Sir Pitt never swore at +Lady Crawley while his son was in the room. + +It was he who taught the butler to say, "My lady is served," and who +insisted on handing her ladyship in to dinner. He seldom spoke to her, +but when he did it was with the most powerful respect; and he never let +her quit the apartment without rising in the most stately manner to +open the door, and making an elegant bow at her egress. + +At Eton he was called Miss Crawley; and there, I am sorry to say, his +younger brother Rawdon used to lick him violently. But though his +parts were not brilliant, he made up for his lack of talent by +meritorious industry, and was never known, during eight years at +school, to be subject to that punishment which it is generally thought +none but a cherub can escape. + +At college his career was of course highly creditable. And here he +prepared himself for public life, into which he was to be introduced by +the patronage of his grandfather, Lord Binkie, by studying the ancient +and modern orators with great assiduity, and by speaking unceasingly at +the debating societies. But though he had a fine flux of words, and +delivered his little voice with great pomposity and pleasure to +himself, and never advanced any sentiment or opinion which was not +perfectly trite and stale, and supported by a Latin quotation; yet he +failed somehow, in spite of a mediocrity which ought to have insured +any man a success. He did not even get the prize poem, which all his +friends said he was sure of. + +After leaving college he became Private Secretary to Lord Binkie, and +was then appointed Attache to the Legation at Pumpernickel, which post +he filled with perfect honour, and brought home despatches, consisting +of Strasburg pie, to the Foreign Minister of the day. After remaining +ten years Attache (several years after the lamented Lord Binkie's +demise), and finding the advancement slow, he at length gave up the +diplomatic service in some disgust, and began to turn country gentleman. + +He wrote a pamphlet on Malt on returning to England (for he was an +ambitious man, and always liked to be before the public), and took a +strong part in the Negro Emancipation question. Then he became a +friend of Mr. Wilberforce's, whose politics he admired, and had that +famous correspondence with the Reverend Silas Hornblower, on the +Ashantee Mission. He was in London, if not for the Parliament session, +at least in May, for the religious meetings. In the country he was a +magistrate, and an active visitor and speaker among those destitute of +religious instruction. He was said to be paying his addresses to Lady +Jane Sheepshanks, Lord Southdown's third daughter, and whose sister, +Lady Emily, wrote those sweet tracts, "The Sailor's True Binnacle," and +"The Applewoman of Finchley Common." + +Miss Sharp's accounts of his employment at Queen's Crawley were not +caricatures. He subjected the servants there to the devotional +exercises before mentioned, in which (and so much the better) he +brought his father to join. He patronised an Independent meeting-house +in Crawley parish, much to the indignation of his uncle the Rector, and +to the consequent delight of Sir Pitt, who was induced to go himself +once or twice, which occasioned some violent sermons at Crawley parish +church, directed point-blank at the Baronet's old Gothic pew there. +Honest Sir Pitt, however, did not feel the force of these discourses, +as he always took his nap during sermon-time. + +Mr. Crawley was very earnest, for the good of the nation and of the +Christian world, that the old gentleman should yield him up his place +in Parliament; but this the elder constantly refused to do. Both were +of course too prudent to give up the fifteen hundred a year which was +brought in by the second seat (at this period filled by Mr. Quadroon, +with carte blanche on the Slave question); indeed the family estate was +much embarrassed, and the income drawn from the borough was of great +use to the house of Queen's Crawley. + +It had never recovered the heavy fine imposed upon Walpole Crawley, +first baronet, for peculation in the Tape and Sealing Wax Office. Sir +Walpole was a jolly fellow, eager to seize and to spend money (alieni +appetens, sui profusus, as Mr. Crawley would remark with a sigh), and +in his day beloved by all the county for the constant drunkenness and +hospitality which was maintained at Queen's Crawley. The cellars were +filled with burgundy then, the kennels with hounds, and the stables +with gallant hunters; now, such horses as Queen's Crawley possessed +went to plough, or ran in the Trafalgar Coach; and it was with a team +of these very horses, on an off-day, that Miss Sharp was brought to the +Hall; for boor as he was, Sir Pitt was a stickler for his dignity while +at home, and seldom drove out but with four horses, and though he dined +off boiled mutton, had always three footmen to serve it. + +If mere parsimony could have made a man rich, Sir Pitt Crawley might +have become very wealthy--if he had been an attorney in a country town, +with no capital but his brains, it is very possible that he would have +turned them to good account, and might have achieved for himself a very +considerable influence and competency. But he was unluckily endowed +with a good name and a large though encumbered estate, both of which +went rather to injure than to advance him. He had a taste for law, +which cost him many thousands yearly; and being a great deal too clever +to be robbed, as he said, by any single agent, allowed his affairs to +be mismanaged by a dozen, whom he all equally mistrusted. He was such a +sharp landlord, that he could hardly find any but bankrupt tenants; and +such a close farmer, as to grudge almost the seed to the ground, +whereupon revengeful Nature grudged him the crops which she granted to +more liberal husbandmen. He speculated in every possible way; he worked +mines; bought canal-shares; horsed coaches; took government contracts, +and was the busiest man and magistrate of his county. As he would not +pay honest agents at his granite quarry, he had the satisfaction of +finding that four overseers ran away, and took fortunes with them to +America. For want of proper precautions, his coal-mines filled with +water: the government flung his contract of damaged beef upon his +hands: and for his coach-horses, every mail proprietor in the kingdom +knew that he lost more horses than any man in the country, from +underfeeding and buying cheap. In disposition he was sociable, and far +from being proud; nay, he rather preferred the society of a farmer or a +horse-dealer to that of a gentleman, like my lord, his son: he was fond +of drink, of swearing, of joking with the farmers' daughters: he was +never known to give away a shilling or to do a good action, but was of +a pleasant, sly, laughing mood, and would cut his joke and drink his +glass with a tenant and sell him up the next day; or have his laugh +with the poacher he was transporting with equal good humour. His +politeness for the fair sex has already been hinted at by Miss Rebecca +Sharp--in a word, the whole baronetage, peerage, commonage of England, +did not contain a more cunning, mean, selfish, foolish, disreputable +old man. That blood-red hand of Sir Pitt Crawley's would be in +anybody's pocket except his own; and it is with grief and pain, that, +as admirers of the British aristocracy, we find ourselves obliged to +admit the existence of so many ill qualities in a person whose name is +in Debrett. + +One great cause why Mr. Crawley had such a hold over the affections of +his father, resulted from money arrangements. The Baronet owed his son +a sum of money out of the jointure of his mother, which he did not find +it convenient to pay; indeed he had an almost invincible repugnance to +paying anybody, and could only be brought by force to discharge his +debts. Miss Sharp calculated (for she became, as we shall hear +speedily, inducted into most of the secrets of the family) that the +mere payment of his creditors cost the honourable Baronet several +hundreds yearly; but this was a delight he could not forego; he had a +savage pleasure in making the poor wretches wait, and in shifting from +court to court and from term to term the period of satisfaction. +What's the good of being in Parliament, he said, if you must pay your +debts? Hence, indeed, his position as a senator was not a little useful +to him. + +Vanity Fair--Vanity Fair! Here was a man, who could not spell, and did +not care to read--who had the habits and the cunning of a boor: whose +aim in life was pettifogging: who never had a taste, or emotion, or +enjoyment, but what was sordid and foul; and yet he had rank, and +honours, and power, somehow: and was a dignitary of the land, and a +pillar of the state. He was high sheriff, and rode in a golden coach. +Great ministers and statesmen courted him; and in Vanity Fair he had a +higher place than the most brilliant genius or spotless virtue. + +Sir Pitt had an unmarried half-sister who inherited her mother's large +fortune, and though the Baronet proposed to borrow this money of her on +mortgage, Miss Crawley declined the offer, and preferred the security +of the funds. She had signified, however, her intention of leaving her +inheritance between Sir Pitt's second son and the family at the +Rectory, and had once or twice paid the debts of Rawdon Crawley in his +career at college and in the army. Miss Crawley was, in consequence, an +object of great respect when she came to Queen's Crawley, for she had a +balance at her banker's which would have made her beloved anywhere. + +What a dignity it gives an old lady, that balance at the banker's! How +tenderly we look at her faults if she is a relative (and may every +reader have a score of such), what a kind good-natured old creature we +find her! How the junior partner of Hobbs and Dobbs leads her smiling +to the carriage with the lozenge upon it, and the fat wheezy coachman! +How, when she comes to pay us a visit, we generally find an opportunity +to let our friends know her station in the world! We say (and with +perfect truth) I wish I had Miss MacWhirter's signature to a cheque for +five thousand pounds. She wouldn't miss it, says your wife. She is my +aunt, say you, in an easy careless way, when your friend asks if Miss +MacWhirter is any relative. Your wife is perpetually sending her +little testimonies of affection, your little girls work endless worsted +baskets, cushions, and footstools for her. What a good fire there is +in her room when she comes to pay you a visit, although your wife laces +her stays without one! The house during her stay assumes a festive, +neat, warm, jovial, snug appearance not visible at other seasons. You +yourself, dear sir, forget to go to sleep after dinner, and find +yourself all of a sudden (though you invariably lose) very fond of a +rubber. What good dinners you have--game every day, Malmsey-Madeira, +and no end of fish from London. Even the servants in the kitchen share +in the general prosperity; and, somehow, during the stay of Miss +MacWhirter's fat coachman, the beer is grown much stronger, and the +consumption of tea and sugar in the nursery (where her maid takes her +meals) is not regarded in the least. Is it so, or is it not so? I +appeal to the middle classes. Ah, gracious powers! I wish you would +send me an old aunt--a maiden aunt--an aunt with a lozenge on her +carriage, and a front of light coffee-coloured hair--how my children +should work workbags for her, and my Julia and I would make her +comfortable! Sweet--sweet vision! Foolish--foolish dream! + + + +CHAPTER X + +Miss Sharp Begins to Make Friends + +And now, being received as a member of the amiable family whose +portraits we have sketched in the foregoing pages, it became naturally +Rebecca's duty to make herself, as she said, agreeable to her +benefactors, and to gain their confidence to the utmost of her power. +Who can but admire this quality of gratitude in an unprotected orphan; +and, if there entered some degree of selfishness into her calculations, +who can say but that her prudence was perfectly justifiable? "I am +alone in the world," said the friendless girl. "I have nothing to look +for but what my own labour can bring me; and while that little +pink-faced chit Amelia, with not half my sense, has ten thousand pounds +and an establishment secure, poor Rebecca (and my figure is far better +than hers) has only herself and her own wits to trust to. Well, let us +see if my wits cannot provide me with an honourable maintenance, and if +some day or the other I cannot show Miss Amelia my real superiority +over her. Not that I dislike poor Amelia: who can dislike such a +harmless, good-natured creature?--only it will be a fine day when I can +take my place above her in the world, as why, indeed, should I not?" +Thus it was that our little romantic friend formed visions of the +future for herself--nor must we be scandalised that, in all her castles +in the air, a husband was the principal inhabitant. Of what else have +young ladies to think, but husbands? Of what else do their dear mammas +think? "I must be my own mamma," said Rebecca; not without a tingling +consciousness of defeat, as she thought over her little misadventure +with Jos Sedley. + +So she wisely determined to render her position with the Queen's +Crawley family comfortable and secure, and to this end resolved to make +friends of every one around her who could at all interfere with her +comfort. + +As my Lady Crawley was not one of these personages, and a woman, +moreover, so indolent and void of character as not to be of the least +consequence in her own house, Rebecca soon found that it was not at all +necessary to cultivate her good will--indeed, impossible to gain it. +She used to talk to her pupils about their "poor mamma"; and, though +she treated that lady with every demonstration of cool respect, it was +to the rest of the family that she wisely directed the chief part of +her attentions. + +With the young people, whose applause she thoroughly gained, her method +was pretty simple. She did not pester their young brains with too much +learning, but, on the contrary, let them have their own way in regard +to educating themselves; for what instruction is more effectual than +self-instruction? The eldest was rather fond of books, and as there was +in the old library at Queen's Crawley a considerable provision of works +of light literature of the last century, both in the French and English +languages (they had been purchased by the Secretary of the Tape and +Sealing Wax Office at the period of his disgrace), and as nobody ever +troubled the bookshelves but herself, Rebecca was enabled agreeably, +and, as it were, in playing, to impart a great deal of instruction to +Miss Rose Crawley. + +She and Miss Rose thus read together many delightful French and English +works, among which may be mentioned those of the learned Dr. Smollett, +of the ingenious Mr. Henry Fielding, of the graceful and fantastic +Monsieur Crebillon the younger, whom our immortal poet Gray so much +admired, and of the universal Monsieur de Voltaire. Once, when Mr. +Crawley asked what the young people were reading, the governess replied +"Smollett." "Oh, Smollett," said Mr. Crawley, quite satisfied. "His +history is more dull, but by no means so dangerous as that of Mr. Hume. +It is history you are reading?" "Yes," said Miss Rose; without, +however, adding that it was the history of Mr. Humphrey Clinker. On +another occasion he was rather scandalised at finding his sister with a +book of French plays; but as the governess remarked that it was for the +purpose of acquiring the French idiom in conversation, he was fain to +be content. Mr. Crawley, as a diplomatist, was exceedingly proud of +his own skill in speaking the French language (for he was of the world +still), and not a little pleased with the compliments which the +governess continually paid him upon his proficiency. + +Miss Violet's tastes were, on the contrary, more rude and boisterous +than those of her sister. She knew the sequestered spots where the +hens laid their eggs. She could climb a tree to rob the nests of the +feathered songsters of their speckled spoils. And her pleasure was to +ride the young colts, and to scour the plains like Camilla. She was the +favourite of her father and of the stablemen. She was the darling, and +withal the terror of the cook; for she discovered the haunts of the +jam-pots, and would attack them when they were within her reach. She +and her sister were engaged in constant battles. Any of which +peccadilloes, if Miss Sharp discovered, she did not tell them to Lady +Crawley; who would have told them to the father, or worse, to Mr. +Crawley; but promised not to tell if Miss Violet would be a good girl +and love her governess. + +With Mr. Crawley Miss Sharp was respectful and obedient. She used to +consult him on passages of French which she could not understand, +though her mother was a Frenchwoman, and which he would construe to her +satisfaction: and, besides giving her his aid in profane literature, he +was kind enough to select for her books of a more serious tendency, and +address to her much of his conversation. She admired, beyond measure, +his speech at the Quashimaboo-Aid Society; took an interest in his +pamphlet on malt: was often affected, even to tears, by his discourses +of an evening, and would say--"Oh, thank you, sir," with a sigh, and a +look up to heaven, that made him occasionally condescend to shake hands +with her. "Blood is everything, after all," would that aristocratic +religionist say. "How Miss Sharp is awakened by my words, when not one +of the people here is touched. I am too fine for them--too delicate. I +must familiarise my style--but she understands it. Her mother was a +Montmorency." + +Indeed it was from this famous family, as it appears, that Miss Sharp, +by the mother's side, was descended. Of course she did not say that her +mother had been on the stage; it would have shocked Mr. Crawley's +religious scruples. How many noble emigres had this horrid revolution +plunged in poverty! She had several stories about her ancestors ere +she had been many months in the house; some of which Mr. Crawley +happened to find in D'Hozier's dictionary, which was in the library, +and which strengthened his belief in their truth, and in the +high-breeding of Rebecca. Are we to suppose from this curiosity and +prying into dictionaries, could our heroine suppose that Mr. Crawley +was interested in her?--no, only in a friendly way. Have we not stated +that he was attached to Lady Jane Sheepshanks? + +He took Rebecca to task once or twice about the propriety of playing at +backgammon with Sir Pitt, saying that it was a godless amusement, and +that she would be much better engaged in reading "Thrump's Legacy," or +"The Blind Washerwoman of Moorfields," or any work of a more serious +nature; but Miss Sharp said her dear mother used often to play the same +game with the old Count de Trictrac and the venerable Abbe du Cornet, +and so found an excuse for this and other worldly amusements. + +But it was not only by playing at backgammon with the Baronet, that the +little governess rendered herself agreeable to her employer. She found +many different ways of being useful to him. She read over, with +indefatigable patience, all those law papers, with which, before she +came to Queen's Crawley, he had promised to entertain her. She +volunteered to copy many of his letters, and adroitly altered the +spelling of them so as to suit the usages of the present day. She +became interested in everything appertaining to the estate, to the +farm, the park, the garden, and the stables; and so delightful a +companion was she, that the Baronet would seldom take his +after-breakfast walk without her (and the children of course), when she +would give her advice as to the trees which were to be lopped in the +shrubberies, the garden-beds to be dug, the crops which were to be cut, +the horses which were to go to cart or plough. Before she had been a +year at Queen's Crawley she had quite won the Baronet's confidence; and +the conversation at the dinner-table, which before used to be held +between him and Mr. Horrocks the butler, was now almost exclusively +between Sir Pitt and Miss Sharp. She was almost mistress of the house +when Mr. Crawley was absent, but conducted herself in her new and +exalted situation with such circumspection and modesty as not to offend +the authorities of the kitchen and stable, among whom her behaviour was +always exceedingly modest and affable. She was quite a different +person from the haughty, shy, dissatisfied little girl whom we have +known previously, and this change of temper proved great prudence, a +sincere desire of amendment, or at any rate great moral courage on her +part. Whether it was the heart which dictated this new system of +complaisance and humility adopted by our Rebecca, is to be proved by +her after-history. A system of hypocrisy, which lasts through whole +years, is one seldom satisfactorily practised by a person of +one-and-twenty; however, our readers will recollect, that, though young +in years, our heroine was old in life and experience, and we have +written to no purpose if they have not discovered that she was a very +clever woman. + +The elder and younger son of the house of Crawley were, like the +gentleman and lady in the weather-box, never at home together--they +hated each other cordially: indeed, Rawdon Crawley, the dragoon, had a +great contempt for the establishment altogether, and seldom came +thither except when his aunt paid her annual visit. + +The great good quality of this old lady has been mentioned. She +possessed seventy thousand pounds, and had almost adopted Rawdon. She +disliked her elder nephew exceedingly, and despised him as a milksop. +In return he did not hesitate to state that her soul was irretrievably +lost, and was of opinion that his brother's chance in the next world +was not a whit better. "She is a godless woman of the world," would +Mr. Crawley say; "she lives with atheists and Frenchmen. My mind +shudders when I think of her awful, awful situation, and that, near as +she is to the grave, she should be so given up to vanity, +licentiousness, profaneness, and folly." In fact, the old lady declined +altogether to hear his hour's lecture of an evening; and when she came +to Queen's Crawley alone, he was obliged to pretermit his usual +devotional exercises. + +"Shut up your sarmons, Pitt, when Miss Crawley comes down," said his +father; "she has written to say that she won't stand the preachifying." + +"O, sir! consider the servants." + +"The servants be hanged," said Sir Pitt; and his son thought even worse +would happen were they deprived of the benefit of his instruction. + +"Why, hang it, Pitt!" said the father to his remonstrance. "You +wouldn't be such a flat as to let three thousand a year go out of the +family?" + +"What is money compared to our souls, sir?" continued Mr. Crawley. + +"You mean that the old lady won't leave the money to you?"--and who +knows but it was Mr. Crawley's meaning? + +Old Miss Crawley was certainly one of the reprobate. She had a snug +little house in Park Lane, and, as she ate and drank a great deal too +much during the season in London, she went to Harrowgate or Cheltenham +for the summer. She was the most hospitable and jovial of old vestals, +and had been a beauty in her day, she said. (All old women were +beauties once, we very well know.) She was a bel esprit, and a dreadful +Radical for those days. She had been in France (where St. Just, they +say, inspired her with an unfortunate passion), and loved, ever after, +French novels, French cookery, and French wines. She read Voltaire, +and had Rousseau by heart; talked very lightly about divorce, and most +energetically of the rights of women. She had pictures of Mr. Fox in +every room in the house: when that statesman was in opposition, I am +not sure that she had not flung a main with him; and when he came into +office, she took great credit for bringing over to him Sir Pitt and his +colleague for Queen's Crawley, although Sir Pitt would have come over +himself, without any trouble on the honest lady's part. It is needless +to say that Sir Pitt was brought to change his views after the death of +the great Whig statesman. + +This worthy old lady took a fancy to Rawdon Crawley when a boy, sent +him to Cambridge (in opposition to his brother at Oxford), and, when +the young man was requested by the authorities of the first-named +University to quit after a residence of two years, she bought him his +commission in the Life Guards Green. + +A perfect and celebrated "blood," or dandy about town, was this young +officer. Boxing, rat-hunting, the fives court, and four-in-hand +driving were then the fashion of our British aristocracy; and he was an +adept in all these noble sciences. And though he belonged to the +household troops, who, as it was their duty to rally round the Prince +Regent, had not shown their valour in foreign service yet, Rawdon +Crawley had already (apropos of play, of which he was immoderately +fond) fought three bloody duels, in which he gave ample proofs of his +contempt for death. + +"And for what follows after death," would Mr. Crawley observe, throwing +his gooseberry-coloured eyes up to the ceiling. He was always thinking +of his brother's soul, or of the souls of those who differed with him +in opinion: it is a sort of comfort which many of the serious give +themselves. + +Silly, romantic Miss Crawley, far from being horrified at the courage +of her favourite, always used to pay his debts after his duels; and +would not listen to a word that was whispered against his morality. +"He will sow his wild oats," she would say, "and is worth far more than +that puling hypocrite of a brother of his." + + + +CHAPTER XI + +Arcadian Simplicity + +Besides these honest folks at the Hall (whose simplicity and sweet +rural purity surely show the advantage of a country life over a town +one), we must introduce the reader to their relatives and neighbours at +the Rectory, Bute Crawley and his wife. + +The Reverend Bute Crawley was a tall, stately, jolly, shovel-hatted +man, far more popular in his county than the Baronet his brother. At +college he pulled stroke-oar in the Christchurch boat, and had thrashed +all the best bruisers of the "town." He carried his taste for boxing +and athletic exercises into private life; there was not a fight within +twenty miles at which he was not present, nor a race, nor a coursing +match, nor a regatta, nor a ball, nor an election, nor a visitation +dinner, nor indeed a good dinner in the whole county, but he found +means to attend it. You might see his bay mare and gig-lamps a score +of miles away from his Rectory House, whenever there was any +dinner-party at Fuddleston, or at Roxby, or at Wapshot Hall, or at the +great lords of the county, with all of whom he was intimate. He had a +fine voice; sang "A southerly wind and a cloudy sky"; and gave the +"whoop" in chorus with general applause. He rode to hounds in a +pepper-and-salt frock, and was one of the best fishermen in the county. + +Mrs. Crawley, the rector's wife, was a smart little body, who wrote +this worthy divine's sermons. Being of a domestic turn, and keeping +the house a great deal with her daughters, she ruled absolutely within +the Rectory, wisely giving her husband full liberty without. He was +welcome to come and go, and dine abroad as many days as his fancy +dictated, for Mrs. Crawley was a saving woman and knew the price of +port wine. Ever since Mrs. Bute carried off the young Rector of +Queen's Crawley (she was of a good family, daughter of the late +Lieut.-Colonel Hector McTavish, and she and her mother played for Bute +and won him at Harrowgate), she had been a prudent and thrifty wife to +him. In spite of her care, however, he was always in debt. It took +him at least ten years to pay off his college bills contracted during +his father's lifetime. In the year 179-, when he was just clear of +these incumbrances, he gave the odds of 100 to 1 (in twenties) against +Kangaroo, who won the Derby. The Rector was obliged to take up the +money at a ruinous interest, and had been struggling ever since. His +sister helped him with a hundred now and then, but of course his great +hope was in her death--when "hang it" (as he would say), "Matilda must +leave me half her money." + +So that the Baronet and his brother had every reason which two brothers +possibly can have for being by the ears. Sir Pitt had had the better +of Bute in innumerable family transactions. Young Pitt not only did +not hunt, but set up a meeting house under his uncle's very nose. +Rawdon, it was known, was to come in for the bulk of Miss Crawley's +property. These money transactions--these speculations in life and +death--these silent battles for reversionary spoil--make brothers very +loving towards each other in Vanity Fair. I, for my part, have known a +five-pound note to interpose and knock up a half century's attachment +between two brethren; and can't but admire, as I think what a fine and +durable thing Love is among worldly people. + +It cannot be supposed that the arrival of such a personage as Rebecca +at Queen's Crawley, and her gradual establishment in the good graces of +all people there, could be unremarked by Mrs. Bute Crawley. Mrs. Bute, +who knew how many days the sirloin of beef lasted at the Hall; how much +linen was got ready at the great wash; how many peaches were on the +south wall; how many doses her ladyship took when she was ill--for such +points are matters of intense interest to certain persons in the +country--Mrs. Bute, I say, could not pass over the Hall governess +without making every inquiry respecting her history and character. +There was always the best understanding between the servants at the +Rectory and the Hall. There was always a good glass of ale in the +kitchen of the former place for the Hall people, whose ordinary drink +was very small--and, indeed, the Rector's lady knew exactly how much +malt went to every barrel of Hall beer--ties of relationship existed +between the Hall and Rectory domestics, as between their masters; and +through these channels each family was perfectly well acquainted with +the doings of the other. That, by the way, may be set down as a +general remark. When you and your brother are friends, his doings are +indifferent to you. When you have quarrelled, all his outgoings and +incomings you know, as if you were his spy. + +Very soon then after her arrival, Rebecca began to take a regular place +in Mrs. Crawley's bulletin from the Hall. It was to this effect: "The +black porker's killed--weighed x stone--salted the sides--pig's pudding +and leg of pork for dinner. Mr. Cramp from Mudbury, over with Sir Pitt +about putting John Blackmore in gaol--Mr. Pitt at meeting (with all the +names of the people who attended)--my lady as usual--the young ladies +with the governess." + +Then the report would come--the new governess be a rare manager--Sir +Pitt be very sweet on her--Mr. Crawley too--He be reading tracts to +her--"What an abandoned wretch!" said little, eager, active, +black-faced Mrs. Bute Crawley. + +Finally, the reports were that the governess had "come round" +everybody, wrote Sir Pitt's letters, did his business, managed his +accounts--had the upper hand of the whole house, my lady, Mr. Crawley, +the girls and all--at which Mrs. Crawley declared she was an artful +hussy, and had some dreadful designs in view. Thus the doings at the +Hall were the great food for conversation at the Rectory, and Mrs. +Bute's bright eyes spied out everything that took place in the enemy's +camp--everything and a great deal besides. + + +Mrs. Bute Crawley to Miss Pinkerton, The Mall, Chiswick. + +Rectory, Queen's Crawley, December--. + +My Dear Madam,--Although it is so many years since I profited by your +delightful and invaluable instructions, yet I have ever retained the +FONDEST and most reverential regard for Miss Pinkerton, and DEAR +Chiswick. I hope your health is GOOD. The world and the cause of +education cannot afford to lose Miss Pinkerton for MANY MANY YEARS. +When my friend, Lady Fuddleston, mentioned that her dear girls required +an instructress (I am too poor to engage a governess for mine, but was +I not educated at Chiswick?)--"Who," I exclaimed, "can we consult but +the excellent, the incomparable Miss Pinkerton?" In a word, have you, +dear madam, any ladies on your list, whose services might be made +available to my kind friend and neighbour? I assure you she will take +no governess BUT OF YOUR CHOOSING. + +My dear husband is pleased to say that he likes EVERYTHING WHICH COMES +FROM MISS PINKERTON'S SCHOOL. How I wish I could present him and my +beloved girls to the friend of my youth, and the ADMIRED of the great +lexicographer of our country! If you ever travel into Hampshire, Mr. +Crawley begs me to say, he hopes you will adorn our RURAL RECTORY with +your presence. 'Tis the humble but happy home of + +Your affectionate Martha Crawley + +P.S. Mr. Crawley's brother, the baronet, with whom we are not, alas! +upon those terms of UNITY in which it BECOMES BRETHREN TO DWELL, has a +governess for his little girls, who, I am told, had the good fortune to +be educated at Chiswick. I hear various reports of her; and as I have +the tenderest interest in my dearest little nieces, whom I wish, in +spite of family differences, to see among my own children--and as I +long to be attentive to ANY PUPIL OF YOURS--do, my dear Miss Pinkerton, +tell me the history of this young lady, whom, for YOUR SAKE, I am most +anxious to befriend.--M. C. + + +Miss Pinkerton to Mrs. Bute Crawley. + +Johnson House, Chiswick, Dec. 18--. + +Dear Madam,--I have the honour to acknowledge your polite +communication, to which I promptly reply. 'Tis most gratifying to one +in my most arduous position to find that my maternal cares have +elicited a responsive affection; and to recognize in the amiable Mrs. +Bute Crawley my excellent pupil of former years, the sprightly and +accomplished Miss Martha MacTavish. I am happy to have under my charge +now the daughters of many of those who were your contemporaries at my +establishment--what pleasure it would give me if your own beloved young +ladies had need of my instructive superintendence! + +Presenting my respectful compliments to Lady Fuddleston, I have the +honour (epistolarily) to introduce to her ladyship my two friends, Miss +Tuffin and Miss Hawky. + +Either of these young ladies is PERFECTLY QUALIFIED to instruct in +Greek, Latin, and the rudiments of Hebrew; in mathematics and history; +in Spanish, French, Italian, and geography; in music, vocal and +instrumental; in dancing, without the aid of a master; and in the +elements of natural sciences. In the use of the globes both are +proficients. In addition to these Miss Tuffin, who is daughter of the +late Reverend Thomas Tuffin (Fellow of Corpus College, Cambridge), can +instruct in the Syriac language, and the elements of Constitutional +law. But as she is only eighteen years of age, and of exceedingly +pleasing personal appearance, perhaps this young lady may be +objectionable in Sir Huddleston Fuddleston's family. + +Miss Letitia Hawky, on the other hand, is not personally well-favoured. +She is twenty-nine; her face is much pitted with the small-pox. She +has a halt in her gait, red hair, and a trifling obliquity of vision. +Both ladies are endowed with EVERY MORAL AND RELIGIOUS VIRTUE. Their +terms, of course, are such as their accomplishments merit. With my +most grateful respects to the Reverend Bute Crawley, I have the honour +to be, + +Dear Madam, + +Your most faithful and obedient servant, Barbara Pinkerton. + +P.S. The Miss Sharp, whom you mention as governess to Sir Pitt +Crawley, Bart., M.P., was a pupil of mine, and I have nothing to say in +her disfavour. Though her appearance is disagreeable, we cannot control +the operations of nature: and though her parents were disreputable (her +father being a painter, several times bankrupt, and her mother, as I +have since learned, with horror, a dancer at the Opera); yet her +talents are considerable, and I cannot regret that I received her OUT +OF CHARITY. My dread is, lest the principles of the mother--who was +represented to me as a French Countess, forced to emigrate in the late +revolutionary horrors; but who, as I have since found, was a person of +the very lowest order and morals--should at any time prove to be +HEREDITARY in the unhappy young woman whom I took as AN OUTCAST. But +her principles have hitherto been correct (I believe), and I am sure +nothing will occur to injure them in the elegant and refined circle of +the eminent Sir Pitt Crawley. + + +Miss Rebecca Sharp to Miss Amelia Sedley. + +I have not written to my beloved Amelia for these many weeks past, for +what news was there to tell of the sayings and doings at Humdrum Hall, +as I have christened it; and what do you care whether the turnip crop +is good or bad; whether the fat pig weighed thirteen stone or fourteen; +and whether the beasts thrive well upon mangelwurzel? Every day since I +last wrote has been like its neighbour. Before breakfast, a walk with +Sir Pitt and his spud; after breakfast studies (such as they are) in +the schoolroom; after schoolroom, reading and writing about lawyers, +leases, coal-mines, canals, with Sir Pitt (whose secretary I am +become); after dinner, Mr. Crawley's discourses on the baronet's +backgammon; during both of which amusements my lady looks on with equal +placidity. She has become rather more interesting by being ailing of +late, which has brought a new visitor to the Hall, in the person of a +young doctor. Well, my dear, young women need never despair. The young +doctor gave a certain friend of yours to understand that, if she chose +to be Mrs. Glauber, she was welcome to ornament the surgery! I told his +impudence that the gilt pestle and mortar was quite ornament enough; as +if I was born, indeed, to be a country surgeon's wife! Mr. Glauber went +home seriously indisposed at his rebuff, took a cooling draught, and is +now quite cured. Sir Pitt applauded my resolution highly; he would be +sorry to lose his little secretary, I think; and I believe the old +wretch likes me as much as it is in his nature to like any one. Marry, +indeed! and with a country apothecary, after-- No, no, one cannot so +soon forget old associations, about which I will talk no more. Let us +return to Humdrum Hall. + +For some time past it is Humdrum Hall no longer. My dear, Miss Crawley +has arrived with her fat horses, fat servants, fat spaniel--the great +rich Miss Crawley, with seventy thousand pounds in the five per cents., +whom, or I had better say WHICH, her two brothers adore. She looks +very apoplectic, the dear soul; no wonder her brothers are anxious +about her. You should see them struggling to settle her cushions, or +to hand her coffee! "When I come into the country," she says (for she +has a great deal of humour), "I leave my toady, Miss Briggs, at home. +My brothers are my toadies here, my dear, and a pretty pair they are!" + +When she comes into the country our hall is thrown open, and for a +month, at least, you would fancy old Sir Walpole was come to life +again. We have dinner-parties, and drive out in the coach-and-four--the +footmen put on their newest canary-coloured liveries; we drink claret +and champagne as if we were accustomed to it every day. We have wax +candles in the schoolroom, and fires to warm ourselves with. Lady +Crawley is made to put on the brightest pea-green in her wardrobe, and +my pupils leave off their thick shoes and tight old tartan pelisses, +and wear silk stockings and muslin frocks, as fashionable baronets' +daughters should. Rose came in yesterday in a sad plight--the +Wiltshire sow (an enormous pet of hers) ran her down, and destroyed a +most lovely flowered lilac silk dress by dancing over it--had this +happened a week ago, Sir Pitt would have sworn frightfully, have boxed +the poor wretch's ears, and put her upon bread and water for a month. +All he said was, "I'll serve you out, Miss, when your aunt's gone," and +laughed off the accident as quite trivial. Let us hope his wrath will +have passed away before Miss Crawley's departure. I hope so, for Miss +Rose's sake, I am sure. What a charming reconciler and peacemaker money +is! + +Another admirable effect of Miss Crawley and her seventy thousand +pounds is to be seen in the conduct of the two brothers Crawley. I +mean the baronet and the rector, not OUR brothers--but the former, who +hate each other all the year round, become quite loving at Christmas. +I wrote to you last year how the abominable horse-racing rector was in +the habit of preaching clumsy sermons at us at church, and how Sir Pitt +snored in answer. When Miss Crawley arrives there is no such thing as +quarrelling heard of--the Hall visits the Rectory, and vice versa--the +parson and the Baronet talk about the pigs and the poachers, and the +county business, in the most affable manner, and without quarrelling in +their cups, I believe--indeed Miss Crawley won't hear of their +quarrelling, and vows that she will leave her money to the Shropshire +Crawleys if they offend her. If they were clever people, those +Shropshire Crawleys, they might have it all, I think; but the +Shropshire Crawley is a clergyman like his Hampshire cousin, and +mortally offended Miss Crawley (who had fled thither in a fit of rage +against her impracticable brethren) by some strait-laced notions of +morality. He would have prayers in the house, I believe. + +Our sermon books are shut up when Miss Crawley arrives, and Mr. Pitt, +whom she abominates, finds it convenient to go to town. On the other +hand, the young dandy--"blood," I believe, is the term--Captain Crawley +makes his appearance, and I suppose you will like to know what sort of +a person he is. + +Well, he is a very large young dandy. He is six feet high, and speaks +with a great voice; and swears a great deal; and orders about the +servants, who all adore him nevertheless; for he is very generous of +his money, and the domestics will do anything for him. Last week the +keepers almost killed a bailiff and his man who came down from London +to arrest the Captain, and who were found lurking about the Park +wall--they beat them, ducked them, and were going to shoot them for +poachers, but the baronet interfered. + +The Captain has a hearty contempt for his father, I can see, and calls +him an old PUT, an old SNOB, an old CHAW-BACON, and numberless other +pretty names. He has a DREADFUL REPUTATION among the ladies. He brings +his hunters home with him, lives with the Squires of the county, asks +whom he pleases to dinner, and Sir Pitt dares not say no, for fear of +offending Miss Crawley, and missing his legacy when she dies of her +apoplexy. Shall I tell you a compliment the Captain paid me? I must, +it is so pretty. One evening we actually had a dance; there was Sir +Huddleston Fuddleston and his family, Sir Giles Wapshot and his young +ladies, and I don't know how many more. Well, I heard him say--"By +Jove, she's a neat little filly!" meaning your humble servant; and he +did me the honour to dance two country-dances with me. He gets on +pretty gaily with the young Squires, with whom he drinks, bets, rides, +and talks about hunting and shooting; but he says the country girls are +BORES; indeed, I don't think he is far wrong. You should see the +contempt with which they look down on poor me! When they dance I sit +and play the piano very demurely; but the other night, coming in rather +flushed from the dining-room, and seeing me employed in this way, he +swore out loud that I was the best dancer in the room, and took a great +oath that he would have the fiddlers from Mudbury. + +"I'll go and play a country-dance," said Mrs. Bute Crawley, very +readily (she is a little, black-faced old woman in a turban, rather +crooked, and with very twinkling eyes); and after the Captain and your +poor little Rebecca had performed a dance together, do you know she +actually did me the honour to compliment me upon my steps! Such a thing +was never heard of before; the proud Mrs. Bute Crawley, first cousin to +the Earl of Tiptoff, who won't condescend to visit Lady Crawley, except +when her sister is in the country. Poor Lady Crawley! during most part +of these gaieties, she is upstairs taking pills. + +Mrs. Bute has all of a sudden taken a great fancy to me. "My dear Miss +Sharp," she says, "why not bring over your girls to the Rectory?--their +cousins will be so happy to see them." I know what she means. Signor +Clementi did not teach us the piano for nothing; at which price Mrs. +Bute hopes to get a professor for her children. I can see through her +schemes, as though she told them to me; but I shall go, as I am +determined to make myself agreeable--is it not a poor governess's duty, +who has not a friend or protector in the world? The Rector's wife paid +me a score of compliments about the progress my pupils made, and +thought, no doubt, to touch my heart--poor, simple, country soul!--as +if I cared a fig about my pupils! + +Your India muslin and your pink silk, dearest Amelia, are said to +become me very well. They are a good deal worn now; but, you know, we +poor girls can't afford des fraiches toilettes. Happy, happy you! who +have but to drive to St. James's Street, and a dear mother who will +give you any thing you ask. Farewell, dearest girl, + +Your affectionate Rebecca. + +P.S.--I wish you could have seen the faces of the Miss Blackbrooks +(Admiral Blackbrook's daughters, my dear), fine young ladies, with +dresses from London, when Captain Rawdon selected poor me for a partner! + + +When Mrs. Bute Crawley (whose artifices our ingenious Rebecca had so +soon discovered) had procured from Miss Sharp the promise of a visit, +she induced the all-powerful Miss Crawley to make the necessary +application to Sir Pitt, and the good-natured old lady, who loved to be +gay herself, and to see every one gay and happy round about her, was +quite charmed, and ready to establish a reconciliation and intimacy +between her two brothers. It was therefore agreed that the young people +of both families should visit each other frequently for the future, and +the friendship of course lasted as long as the jovial old mediatrix was +there to keep the peace. + +"Why did you ask that scoundrel, Rawdon Crawley, to dine?" said the +Rector to his lady, as they were walking home through the park. "I +don't want the fellow. He looks down upon us country people as so many +blackamoors. He's never content unless he gets my yellow-sealed wine, +which costs me ten shillings a bottle, hang him! Besides, he's such an +infernal character--he's a gambler--he's a drunkard--he's a profligate +in every way. He shot a man in a duel--he's over head and ears in +debt, and he's robbed me and mine of the best part of Miss Crawley's +fortune. Waxy says she has him"--here the Rector shook his fist at the +moon, with something very like an oath, and added, in a melancholious +tone, "--down in her will for fifty thousand; and there won't be above +thirty to divide." + +"I think she's going," said the Rector's wife. "She was very red in +the face when we left dinner. I was obliged to unlace her." + +"She drank seven glasses of champagne," said the reverend gentleman, in +a low voice; "and filthy champagne it is, too, that my brother poisons +us with--but you women never know what's what." + +"We know nothing," said Mrs. Bute Crawley. + +"She drank cherry-brandy after dinner," continued his Reverence, "and +took curacao with her coffee. I wouldn't take a glass for a five-pound +note: it kills me with heartburn. She can't stand it, Mrs. +Crawley--she must go--flesh and blood won't bear it! and I lay five to +two, Matilda drops in a year." + +Indulging in these solemn speculations, and thinking about his debts, +and his son Jim at College, and Frank at Woolwich, and the four girls, +who were no beauties, poor things, and would not have a penny but what +they got from the aunt's expected legacy, the Rector and his lady +walked on for a while. + +"Pitt can't be such an infernal villain as to sell the reversion of the +living. And that Methodist milksop of an eldest son looks to +Parliament," continued Mr. Crawley, after a pause. + +"Sir Pitt Crawley will do anything," said the Rector's wife. "We must +get Miss Crawley to make him promise it to James." + +"Pitt will promise anything," replied the brother. "He promised he'd +pay my college bills, when my father died; he promised he'd build the +new wing to the Rectory; he promised he'd let me have Jibb's field and +the Six-acre Meadow--and much he executed his promises! And it's to +this man's son--this scoundrel, gambler, swindler, murderer of a Rawdon +Crawley, that Matilda leaves the bulk of her money. I say it's +un-Christian. By Jove, it is. The infamous dog has got every vice +except hypocrisy, and that belongs to his brother." + +"Hush, my dearest love! we're in Sir Pitt's grounds," interposed his +wife. + +"I say he has got every vice, Mrs. Crawley. Don't Ma'am, bully me. +Didn't he shoot Captain Marker? Didn't he rob young Lord Dovedale at +the Cocoa-Tree? Didn't he cross the fight between Bill Soames and the +Cheshire Trump, by which I lost forty pound? You know he did; and as +for the women, why, you heard that before me, in my own magistrate's +room." + +"For heaven's sake, Mr. Crawley," said the lady, "spare me the details." + +"And you ask this villain into your house!" continued the exasperated +Rector. "You, the mother of a young family--the wife of a clergyman of +the Church of England. By Jove!" + +"Bute Crawley, you are a fool," said the Rector's wife scornfully. + +"Well, Ma'am, fool or not--and I don't say, Martha, I'm so clever as +you are, I never did. But I won't meet Rawdon Crawley, that's flat. +I'll go over to Huddleston, that I will, and see his black greyhound, +Mrs. Crawley; and I'll run Lancelot against him for fifty. By Jove, I +will; or against any dog in England. But I won't meet that beast +Rawdon Crawley." + +"Mr. Crawley, you are intoxicated, as usual," replied his wife. And +the next morning, when the Rector woke, and called for small beer, she +put him in mind of his promise to visit Sir Huddleston Fuddleston on +Saturday, and as he knew he should have a wet night, it was agreed that +he might gallop back again in time for church on Sunday morning. Thus +it will be seen that the parishioners of Crawley were equally happy in +their Squire and in their Rector. + +Miss Crawley had not long been established at the Hall before Rebecca's +fascinations had won the heart of that good-natured London rake, as +they had of the country innocents whom we have been describing. Taking +her accustomed drive, one day, she thought fit to order that "that +little governess" should accompany her to Mudbury. Before they had +returned Rebecca had made a conquest of her; having made her laugh four +times, and amused her during the whole of the little journey. + +"Not let Miss Sharp dine at table!" said she to Sir Pitt, who had +arranged a dinner of ceremony, and asked all the neighbouring baronets. +"My dear creature, do you suppose I can talk about the nursery with +Lady Fuddleston, or discuss justices' business with that goose, old Sir +Giles Wapshot? I insist upon Miss Sharp appearing. Let Lady Crawley +remain upstairs, if there is no room. But little Miss Sharp! Why, she's +the only person fit to talk to in the county!" + +Of course, after such a peremptory order as this, Miss Sharp, the +governess, received commands to dine with the illustrious company below +stairs. And when Sir Huddleston had, with great pomp and ceremony, +handed Miss Crawley in to dinner, and was preparing to take his place +by her side, the old lady cried out, in a shrill voice, "Becky Sharp! +Miss Sharp! Come you and sit by me and amuse me; and let Sir +Huddleston sit by Lady Wapshot." + +When the parties were over, and the carriages had rolled away, the +insatiable Miss Crawley would say, "Come to my dressing room, Becky, +and let us abuse the company"--which, between them, this pair of +friends did perfectly. Old Sir Huddleston wheezed a great deal at +dinner; Sir Giles Wapshot had a particularly noisy manner of imbibing +his soup, and her ladyship a wink of the left eye; all of which Becky +caricatured to admiration; as well as the particulars of the night's +conversation; the politics; the war; the quarter-sessions; the famous +run with the H.H., and those heavy and dreary themes, about which +country gentlemen converse. As for the Misses Wapshot's toilettes and +Lady Fuddleston's famous yellow hat, Miss Sharp tore them to tatters, +to the infinite amusement of her audience. + +"My dear, you are a perfect trouvaille," Miss Crawley would say. "I +wish you could come to me in London, but I couldn't make a butt of you +as I do of poor Briggs no, no, you little sly creature; you are too +clever--Isn't she, Firkin?" + +Mrs. Firkin (who was dressing the very small remnant of hair which +remained on Miss Crawley's pate), flung up her head and said, "I think +Miss is very clever," with the most killing sarcastic air. In fact, +Mrs. Firkin had that natural jealousy which is one of the main +principles of every honest woman. + +After rebuffing Sir Huddleston Fuddleston, Miss Crawley ordered that +Rawdon Crawley should lead her in to dinner every day, and that Becky +should follow with her cushion--or else she would have Becky's arm and +Rawdon with the pillow. "We must sit together," she said. "We're the +only three Christians in the county, my love"--in which case, it must +be confessed, that religion was at a very low ebb in the county of +Hants. + +Besides being such a fine religionist, Miss Crawley was, as we have +said, an Ultra-liberal in opinions, and always took occasion to express +these in the most candid manner. + +"What is birth, my dear!" she would say to Rebecca--"Look at my brother +Pitt; look at the Huddlestons, who have been here since Henry II; look +at poor Bute at the parsonage--is any one of them equal to you in +intelligence or breeding? Equal to you--they are not even equal to poor +dear Briggs, my companion, or Bowls, my butler. You, my love, are a +little paragon--positively a little jewel--You have more brains than +half the shire--if merit had its reward you ought to be a Duchess--no, +there ought to be no duchesses at all--but you ought to have no +superior, and I consider you, my love, as my equal in every respect; +and--will you put some coals on the fire, my dear; and will you pick +this dress of mine, and alter it, you who can do it so well?" So this +old philanthropist used to make her equal run of her errands, execute +her millinery, and read her to sleep with French novels, every night. + +At this time, as some old readers may recollect, the genteel world had +been thrown into a considerable state of excitement by two events, +which, as the papers say, might give employment to the gentlemen of the +long robe. Ensign Shafton had run away with Lady Barbara Fitzurse, the +Earl of Bruin's daughter and heiress; and poor Vere Vane, a gentleman +who, up to forty, had maintained a most respectable character and +reared a numerous family, suddenly and outrageously left his home, for +the sake of Mrs. Rougemont, the actress, who was sixty-five years of +age. + +"That was the most beautiful part of dear Lord Nelson's character," +Miss Crawley said. "He went to the deuce for a woman. There must be +good in a man who will do that. I adore all imprudent matches.-- What +I like best, is for a nobleman to marry a miller's daughter, as Lord +Flowerdale did--it makes all the women so angry--I wish some great man +would run away with you, my dear; I'm sure you're pretty enough." + +"Two post-boys!--Oh, it would be delightful!" Rebecca owned. + +"And what I like next best, is for a poor fellow to run away with a +rich girl. I have set my heart on Rawdon running away with some one." + +"A rich some one, or a poor some one?" + +"Why, you goose! Rawdon has not a shilling but what I give him. He is +crible de dettes--he must repair his fortunes, and succeed in the +world." + +"Is he very clever?" Rebecca asked. + +"Clever, my love?--not an idea in the world beyond his horses, and his +regiment, and his hunting, and his play; but he must succeed--he's so +delightfully wicked. Don't you know he has hit a man, and shot an +injured father through the hat only? He's adored in his regiment; and +all the young men at Wattier's and the Cocoa-Tree swear by him." + +When Miss Rebecca Sharp wrote to her beloved friend the account of the +little ball at Queen's Crawley, and the manner in which, for the first +time, Captain Crawley had distinguished her, she did not, strange to +relate, give an altogether accurate account of the transaction. The +Captain had distinguished her a great number of times before. The +Captain had met her in a half-score of walks. The Captain had lighted +upon her in a half-hundred of corridors and passages. The Captain had +hung over her piano twenty times of an evening (my Lady was now +upstairs, being ill, and nobody heeded her) as Miss Sharp sang. The +Captain had written her notes (the best that the great blundering +dragoon could devise and spell; but dulness gets on as well as any +other quality with women). But when he put the first of the notes into +the leaves of the song she was singing, the little governess, rising +and looking him steadily in the face, took up the triangular missive +daintily, and waved it about as if it were a cocked hat, and she, +advancing to the enemy, popped the note into the fire, and made him a +very low curtsey, and went back to her place, and began to sing away +again more merrily than ever. + +"What's that?" said Miss Crawley, interrupted in her after-dinner doze +by the stoppage of the music. + +"It's a false note," Miss Sharp said with a laugh; and Rawdon Crawley +fumed with rage and mortification. + +Seeing the evident partiality of Miss Crawley for the new governess, +how good it was of Mrs. Bute Crawley not to be jealous, and to welcome +the young lady to the Rectory, and not only her, but Rawdon Crawley, +her husband's rival in the Old Maid's five per cents! They became very +fond of each other's society, Mrs. Crawley and her nephew. He gave up +hunting; he declined entertainments at Fuddleston: he would not dine +with the mess of the depot at Mudbury: his great pleasure was to stroll +over to Crawley parsonage--whither Miss Crawley came too; and as their +mamma was ill, why not the children with Miss Sharp? So the children +(little dears!) came with Miss Sharp; and of an evening some of the +party would walk back together. Not Miss Crawley--she preferred her +carriage--but the walk over the Rectory fields, and in at the little +park wicket, and through the dark plantation, and up the checkered +avenue to Queen's Crawley, was charming in the moonlight to two such +lovers of the picturesque as the Captain and Miss Rebecca. + +"O those stars, those stars!" Miss Rebecca would say, turning her +twinkling green eyes up towards them. "I feel myself almost a spirit +when I gaze upon them." + +"O--ah--Gad--yes, so do I exactly, Miss Sharp," the other enthusiast +replied. "You don't mind my cigar, do you, Miss Sharp?" Miss Sharp +loved the smell of a cigar out of doors beyond everything in the +world--and she just tasted one too, in the prettiest way possible, and +gave a little puff, and a little scream, and a little giggle, and +restored the delicacy to the Captain, who twirled his moustache, and +straightway puffed it into a blaze that glowed quite red in the dark +plantation, and swore--"Jove--aw--Gad--aw--it's the finest segaw I ever +smoked in the world aw," for his intellect and conversation were alike +brilliant and becoming to a heavy young dragoon. + +Old Sir Pitt, who was taking his pipe and beer, and talking to John +Horrocks about a "ship" that was to be killed, espied the pair so +occupied from his study-window, and with dreadful oaths swore that if +it wasn't for Miss Crawley, he'd take Rawdon and bundle un out of +doors, like a rogue as he was. + +"He be a bad'n, sure enough," Mr. Horrocks remarked; "and his man +Flethers is wuss, and have made such a row in the housekeeper's room +about the dinners and hale, as no lord would make--but I think Miss +Sharp's a match for'n, Sir Pitt," he added, after a pause. + +And so, in truth, she was--for father and son too. + + + +CHAPTER XII + +Quite a Sentimental Chapter + +We must now take leave of Arcadia, and those amiable people practising +the rural virtues there, and travel back to London, to inquire what has +become of Miss Amelia. + +"We don't care a fig for her," writes some unknown correspondent with a +pretty little handwriting and a pink seal to her note. "She is fade and +insipid," and adds some more kind remarks in this strain, which I should +never have repeated at all, but that they are in truth prodigiously +complimentary to the young lady whom they concern. + +Has the beloved reader, in his experience of society, never heard +similar remarks by good-natured female friends; who always wonder what +you CAN see in Miss Smith that is so fascinating; or what COULD induce +Major Jones to propose for that silly insignificant simpering Miss +Thompson, who has nothing but her wax-doll face to recommend her? What +is there in a pair of pink cheeks and blue eyes forsooth? these dear +Moralists ask, and hint wisely that the gifts of genius, the +accomplishments of the mind, the mastery of Mangnall's Questions, and a +ladylike knowledge of botany and geology, the knack of making poetry, +the power of rattling sonatas in the Herz-manner, and so forth, are far +more valuable endowments for a female, than those fugitive charms which +a few years will inevitably tarnish. It is quite edifying to hear +women speculate upon the worthlessness and the duration of beauty. + +But though virtue is a much finer thing, and those hapless creatures +who suffer under the misfortune of good looks ought to be continually +put in mind of the fate which awaits them; and though, very likely, the +heroic female character which ladies admire is a more glorious and +beautiful object than the kind, fresh, smiling, artless, tender little +domestic goddess, whom men are inclined to worship--yet the latter and +inferior sort of women must have this consolation--that the men do +admire them after all; and that, in spite of all our kind friends' +warnings and protests, we go on in our desperate error and folly, and +shall to the end of the chapter. Indeed, for my own part, though I have +been repeatedly told by persons for whom I have the greatest respect, +that Miss Brown is an insignificant chit, and Mrs. White has nothing +but her petit minois chiffonne, and Mrs. Black has not a word to say +for herself; yet I know that I have had the most delightful +conversations with Mrs. Black (of course, my dear Madam, they are +inviolable): I see all the men in a cluster round Mrs. White's chair: +all the young fellows battling to dance with Miss Brown; and so I am +tempted to think that to be despised by her sex is a very great +compliment to a woman. + +The young ladies in Amelia's society did this for her very +satisfactorily. For instance, there was scarcely any point upon which +the Misses Osborne, George's sisters, and the Mesdemoiselles Dobbin +agreed so well as in their estimate of her very trifling merits: and +their wonder that their brothers could find any charms in her. "We are +kind to her," the Misses Osborne said, a pair of fine black-browed +young ladies who had had the best of governesses, masters, and +milliners; and they treated her with such extreme kindness and +condescension, and patronised her so insufferably, that the poor little +thing was in fact perfectly dumb in their presence, and to all outward +appearance as stupid as they thought her. She made efforts to like +them, as in duty bound, and as sisters of her future husband. She +passed "long mornings" with them--the most dreary and serious of +forenoons. She drove out solemnly in their great family coach with +them, and Miss Wirt their governess, that raw-boned Vestal. They took +her to the ancient concerts by way of a treat, and to the oratorio, and +to St. Paul's to see the charity children, where in such terror was she +of her friends, she almost did not dare be affected by the hymn the +children sang. Their house was comfortable; their papa's table rich +and handsome; their society solemn and genteel; their self-respect +prodigious; they had the best pew at the Foundling: all their habits +were pompous and orderly, and all their amusements intolerably dull and +decorous. After every one of her visits (and oh how glad she was when +they were over!) Miss Osborne and Miss Maria Osborne, and Miss Wirt, +the vestal governess, asked each other with increased wonder, "What +could George find in that creature?" + +How is this? some carping reader exclaims. How is it that Amelia, who +had such a number of friends at school, and was so beloved there, comes +out into the world and is spurned by her discriminating sex? My dear +sir, there were no men at Miss Pinkerton's establishment except the old +dancing-master; and you would not have had the girls fall out about +HIM? When George, their handsome brother, ran off directly after +breakfast, and dined from home half-a-dozen times a week, no wonder the +neglected sisters felt a little vexation. When young Bullock (of the +firm of Hulker, Bullock & Co., Bankers, Lombard Street), who had been +making up to Miss Maria the last two seasons, actually asked Amelia to +dance the cotillon, could you expect that the former young lady should +be pleased? And yet she said she was, like an artless forgiving +creature. "I'm so delighted you like dear Amelia," she said quite +eagerly to Mr. Bullock after the dance. "She's engaged to my brother +George; there's not much in her, but she's the best-natured and most +unaffected young creature: at home we're all so fond of her." Dear +girl! who can calculate the depth of affection expressed in that +enthusiastic SO? + +Miss Wirt and these two affectionate young women so earnestly and +frequently impressed upon George Osborne's mind the enormity of the +sacrifice he was making, and his romantic generosity in throwing +himself away upon Amelia, that I'm not sure but that he really thought +he was one of the most deserving characters in the British army, and +gave himself up to be loved with a good deal of easy resignation. + +Somehow, although he left home every morning, as was stated, and dined +abroad six days in the week, when his sisters believed the infatuated +youth to be at Miss Sedley's apron-strings: he was NOT always with +Amelia, whilst the world supposed him at her feet. Certain it is that +on more occasions than one, when Captain Dobbin called to look for his +friend, Miss Osborne (who was very attentive to the Captain, and +anxious to hear his military stories, and to know about the health of +his dear Mamma), would laughingly point to the opposite side of the +square, and say, "Oh, you must go to the Sedleys' to ask for George; WE +never see him from morning till night." At which kind of speech the +Captain would laugh in rather an absurd constrained manner, and turn +off the conversation, like a consummate man of the world, to some topic +of general interest, such as the Opera, the Prince's last ball at +Carlton House, or the weather--that blessing to society. + +"What an innocent it is, that pet of yours," Miss Maria would then say +to Miss Jane, upon the Captain's departure. "Did you see how he +blushed at the mention of poor George on duty?" + +"It's a pity Frederick Bullock hadn't some of his modesty, Maria," +replies the elder sister, with a toss of he head. + +"Modesty! Awkwardness you mean, Jane. I don't want Frederick to +trample a hole in my muslin frock, as Captain Dobbin did in yours at +Mrs. Perkins'." + +"In YOUR frock, he, he! How could he? Wasn't he dancing with Amelia?" + +The fact is, when Captain Dobbin blushed so, and looked so awkward, he +remembered a circumstance of which he did not think it was necessary to +inform the young ladies, viz., that he had been calling at Mr. Sedley's +house already, on the pretence of seeing George, of course, and George +wasn't there, only poor little Amelia, with rather a sad wistful face, +seated near the drawing-room window, who, after some very trifling +stupid talk, ventured to ask, was there any truth in the report that +the regiment was soon to be ordered abroad; and had Captain Dobbin seen +Mr. Osborne that day? + +The regiment was not ordered abroad as yet; and Captain Dobbin had not +seen George. "He was with his sister, most likely," the Captain said. +"Should he go and fetch the truant?" So she gave him her hand kindly +and gratefully: and he crossed the square; and she waited and waited, +but George never came. + +Poor little tender heart! and so it goes on hoping and beating, and +longing and trusting. You see it is not much of a life to describe. +There is not much of what you call incident in it. Only one feeling +all day--when will he come? only one thought to sleep and wake upon. I +believe George was playing billiards with Captain Cannon in Swallow +Street at the time when Amelia was asking Captain Dobbin about him; for +George was a jolly sociable fellow, and excellent in all games of skill. + +Once, after three days of absence, Miss Amelia put on her bonnet, and +actually invaded the Osborne house. "What! leave our brother to come to +us?" said the young ladies. "Have you had a quarrel, Amelia? Do tell +us!" No, indeed, there had been no quarrel. "Who could quarrel with +him?" says she, with her eyes filled with tears. She only came over +to--to see her dear friends; they had not met for so long. And this +day she was so perfectly stupid and awkward, that the Misses Osborne +and their governess, who stared after her as she went sadly away, +wondered more than ever what George could see in poor little Amelia. + +Of course they did. How was she to bare that timid little heart for +the inspection of those young ladies with their bold black eyes? It was +best that it should shrink and hide itself. I know the Misses Osborne +were excellent critics of a Cashmere shawl, or a pink satin slip; and +when Miss Turner had hers dyed purple, and made into a spencer; and +when Miss Pickford had her ermine tippet twisted into a muff and +trimmings, I warrant you the changes did not escape the two intelligent +young women before mentioned. But there are things, look you, of a +finer texture than fur or satin, and all Solomon's glories, and all the +wardrobe of the Queen of Sheba--things whereof the beauty escapes the +eyes of many connoisseurs. And there are sweet modest little souls on +which you light, fragrant and blooming tenderly in quiet shady places; +and there are garden-ornaments, as big as brass warming-pans, that are +fit to stare the sun itself out of countenance. Miss Sedley was not of +the sunflower sort; and I say it is out of the rules of all proportion +to draw a violet of the size of a double dahlia. + +No, indeed; the life of a good young girl who is in the paternal nest +as yet, can't have many of those thrilling incidents to which the +heroine of romance commonly lays claim. Snares or shot may take off +the old birds foraging without--hawks may be abroad, from which they +escape or by whom they suffer; but the young ones in the nest have a +pretty comfortable unromantic sort of existence in the down and the +straw, till it comes to their turn, too, to get on the wing. While +Becky Sharp was on her own wing in the country, hopping on all sorts of +twigs, and amid a multiplicity of traps, and pecking up her food quite +harmless and successful, Amelia lay snug in her home of Russell Square; +if she went into the world, it was under the guidance of the elders; +nor did it seem that any evil could befall her or that opulent cheery +comfortable home in which she was affectionately sheltered. Mamma had +her morning duties, and her daily drive, and the delightful round of +visits and shopping which forms the amusement, or the profession as you +may call it, of the rich London lady. Papa conducted his mysterious +operations in the City--a stirring place in those days, when war was +raging all over Europe, and empires were being staked; when the +"Courier" newspaper had tens of thousands of subscribers; when one day +brought you a battle of Vittoria, another a burning of Moscow, or a +newsman's horn blowing down Russell Square about dinner-time, announced +such a fact as--"Battle of Leipsic--six hundred thousand men +engaged--total defeat of the French--two hundred thousand killed." Old +Sedley once or twice came home with a very grave face; and no wonder, +when such news as this was agitating all the hearts and all the Stocks +of Europe. + +Meanwhile matters went on in Russell Square, Bloomsbury, just as if +matters in Europe were not in the least disorganised. The retreat from +Leipsic made no difference in the number of meals Mr. Sambo took in the +servants' hall; the allies poured into France, and the dinner-bell rang +at five o'clock just as usual. I don't think poor Amelia cared +anything about Brienne and Montmirail, or was fairly interested in the +war until the abdication of the Emperor; when she clapped her hands and +said prayers--oh, how grateful! and flung herself into George Osborne's +arms with all her soul, to the astonishment of everybody who witnessed +that ebullition of sentiment. The fact is, peace was declared, Europe +was going to be at rest; the Corsican was overthrown, and Lieutenant +Osborne's regiment would not be ordered on service. That was the way +in which Miss Amelia reasoned. The fate of Europe was Lieutenant +George Osborne to her. His dangers being over, she sang Te Deum. He +was her Europe: her emperor: her allied monarchs and august prince +regent. He was her sun and moon; and I believe she thought the grand +illumination and ball at the Mansion House, given to the sovereigns, +were especially in honour of George Osborne. + +We have talked of shift, self, and poverty, as those dismal instructors +under whom poor Miss Becky Sharp got her education. Now, love was Miss +Amelia Sedley's last tutoress, and it was amazing what progress our +young lady made under that popular teacher. In the course of fifteen +or eighteen months' daily and constant attention to this eminent +finishing governess, what a deal of secrets Amelia learned, which Miss +Wirt and the black-eyed young ladies over the way, which old Miss +Pinkerton of Chiswick herself, had no cognizance of! As, indeed, how +should any of those prim and reputable virgins? With Misses P. and W. +the tender passion is out of the question: I would not dare to breathe +such an idea regarding them. Miss Maria Osborne, it is true, was +"attached" to Mr. Frederick Augustus Bullock, of the firm of Hulker, +Bullock & Bullock; but hers was a most respectable attachment, and she +would have taken Bullock Senior just the same, her mind being fixed--as +that of a well-bred young woman should be--upon a house in Park Lane, a +country house at Wimbledon, a handsome chariot, and two prodigious tall +horses and footmen, and a fourth of the annual profits of the eminent +firm of Hulker & Bullock, all of which advantages were represented in +the person of Frederick Augustus. Had orange blossoms been invented +then (those touching emblems of female purity imported by us from +France, where people's daughters are universally sold in marriage), +Miss Maria, I say, would have assumed the spotless wreath, and stepped +into the travelling carriage by the side of gouty, old, bald-headed, +bottle-nosed Bullock Senior; and devoted her beautiful existence to his +happiness with perfect modesty--only the old gentleman was married +already; so she bestowed her young affections on the junior partner. +Sweet, blooming, orange flowers! The other day I saw Miss Trotter +(that was), arrayed in them, trip into the travelling carriage at St. +George's, Hanover Square, and Lord Methuselah hobbled in after. With +what an engaging modesty she pulled down the blinds of the chariot--the +dear innocent! There were half the carriages of Vanity Fair at the +wedding. + +This was not the sort of love that finished Amelia's education; and in +the course of a year turned a good young girl into a good young +woman--to be a good wife presently, when the happy time should come. +This young person (perhaps it was very imprudent in her parents to +encourage her, and abet her in such idolatry and silly romantic ideas) +loved, with all her heart, the young officer in His Majesty's service +with whom we have made a brief acquaintance. She thought about him the +very first moment on waking; and his was the very last name mentioned +in her prayers. She never had seen a man so beautiful or so clever: +such a figure on horseback: such a dancer: such a hero in general. +Talk of the Prince's bow! what was it to George's? She had seen Mr. +Brummell, whom everybody praised so. Compare such a person as that to +her George! Not amongst all the beaux at the Opera (and there were +beaux in those days with actual opera hats) was there any one to equal +him. He was only good enough to be a fairy prince; and oh, what +magnanimity to stoop to such a humble Cinderella! Miss Pinkerton would +have tried to check this blind devotion very likely, had she been +Amelia's confidante; but not with much success, depend upon it. It is +in the nature and instinct of some women. Some are made to scheme, and +some to love; and I wish any respected bachelor that reads this may +take the sort that best likes him. + +While under this overpowering impression, Miss Amelia neglected her +twelve dear friends at Chiswick most cruelly, as such selfish people +commonly will do. She had but this subject, of course, to think about; +and Miss Saltire was too cold for a confidante, and she couldn't bring +her mind to tell Miss Swartz, the woolly-haired young heiress from St. +Kitt's. She had little Laura Martin home for the holidays; and my +belief is, she made a confidante of her, and promised that Laura should +come and live with her when she was married, and gave Laura a great +deal of information regarding the passion of love, which must have been +singularly useful and novel to that little person. Alas, alas! I fear +poor Emmy had not a well-regulated mind. + +What were her parents doing, not to keep this little heart from beating +so fast? Old Sedley did not seem much to notice matters. He was graver +of late, and his City affairs absorbed him. Mrs. Sedley was of so easy +and uninquisitive a nature that she wasn't even jealous. Mr. Jos was +away, being besieged by an Irish widow at Cheltenham. Amelia had the +house to herself--ah! too much to herself sometimes--not that she ever +doubted; for, to be sure, George must be at the Horse Guards; and he +can't always get leave from Chatham; and he must see his friends and +sisters, and mingle in society when in town (he, such an ornament to +every society!); and when he is with the regiment, he is too tired to +write long letters. I know where she kept that packet she had--and can +steal in and out of her chamber like Iachimo--like Iachimo? No--that +is a bad part. I will only act Moonshine, and peep harmless into the +bed where faith and beauty and innocence lie dreaming. + +But if Osborne's were short and soldierlike letters, it must be +confessed, that were Miss Sedley's letters to Mr. Osborne to be +published, we should have to extend this novel to such a multiplicity +of volumes as not the most sentimental reader could support; that she +not only filled sheets of large paper, but crossed them with the most +astonishing perverseness; that she wrote whole pages out of +poetry-books without the least pity; that she underlined words and +passages with quite a frantic emphasis; and, in fine, gave the usual +tokens of her condition. She wasn't a heroine. Her letters were full +of repetition. She wrote rather doubtful grammar sometimes, and in her +verses took all sorts of liberties with the metre. But oh, mesdames, +if you are not allowed to touch the heart sometimes in spite of syntax, +and are not to be loved until you all know the difference between +trimeter and tetrameter, may all Poetry go to the deuce, and every +schoolmaster perish miserably! + + + +CHAPTER XIII + +Sentimental and Otherwise + +I fear the gentleman to whom Miss Amelia's letters were addressed was +rather an obdurate critic. Such a number of notes followed Lieutenant +Osborne about the country, that he became almost ashamed of the jokes +of his mess-room companions regarding them, and ordered his servant +never to deliver them except at his private apartment. He was seen +lighting his cigar with one, to the horror of Captain Dobbin, who, it +is my belief, would have given a bank-note for the document. + +For some time George strove to keep the liaison a secret. There was a +woman in the case, that he admitted. "And not the first either," said +Ensign Spooney to Ensign Stubble. "That Osborne's a devil of a fellow. +There was a judge's daughter at Demerara went almost mad about him; +then there was that beautiful quadroon girl, Miss Pye, at St. +Vincent's, you know; and since he's been home, they say he's a regular +Don Giovanni, by Jove." + +Stubble and Spooney thought that to be a "regular Don Giovanni, by +Jove" was one of the finest qualities a man could possess, and +Osborne's reputation was prodigious amongst the young men of the +regiment. He was famous in field-sports, famous at a song, famous on +parade; free with his money, which was bountifully supplied by his +father. His coats were better made than any man's in the regiment, and +he had more of them. He was adored by the men. He could drink more +than any officer of the whole mess, including old Heavytop, the +colonel. He could spar better than Knuckles, the private (who would +have been a corporal but for his drunkenness, and who had been in the +prize-ring); and was the best batter and bowler, out and out, of the +regimental club. He rode his own horse, Greased Lightning, and won the +Garrison cup at Quebec races. There were other people besides Amelia +who worshipped him. Stubble and Spooney thought him a sort of Apollo; +Dobbin took him to be an Admirable Crichton; and Mrs. Major O'Dowd +acknowledged he was an elegant young fellow, and put her in mind of +Fitzjurld Fogarty, Lord Castlefogarty's second son. + +Well, Stubble and Spooney and the rest indulged in most romantic +conjectures regarding this female correspondent of Osborne's--opining +that it was a Duchess in London who was in love with him--or that it +was a General's daughter, who was engaged to somebody else, and madly +attached to him--or that it was a Member of Parliament's lady, who +proposed four horses and an elopement--or that it was some other victim +of a passion delightfully exciting, romantic, and disgraceful to all +parties, on none of which conjectures would Osborne throw the least +light, leaving his young admirers and friends to invent and arrange +their whole history. + +And the real state of the case would never have been known at all in +the regiment but for Captain Dobbin's indiscretion. The Captain was +eating his breakfast one day in the mess-room, while Cackle, the +assistant-surgeon, and the two above-named worthies were speculating +upon Osborne's intrigue--Stubble holding out that the lady was a +Duchess about Queen Charlotte's court, and Cackle vowing she was an +opera-singer of the worst reputation. At this idea Dobbin became so +moved, that though his mouth was full of eggs and bread-and-butter at +the time, and though he ought not to have spoken at all, yet he +couldn't help blurting out, "Cackle, you're a stupid fool. You're +always talking nonsense and scandal. Osborne is not going to run off +with a Duchess or ruin a milliner. Miss Sedley is one of the most +charming young women that ever lived. He's been engaged to her ever so +long; and the man who calls her names had better not do so in my +hearing." With which, turning exceedingly red, Dobbin ceased speaking, +and almost choked himself with a cup of tea. The story was over the +regiment in half-an-hour; and that very evening Mrs. Major O'Dowd wrote +off to her sister Glorvina at O'Dowdstown not to hurry from +Dublin--young Osborne being prematurely engaged already. + +She complimented the Lieutenant in an appropriate speech over a glass +of whisky-toddy that evening, and he went home perfectly furious to +quarrel with Dobbin (who had declined Mrs. Major O'Dowd's party, and +sat in his own room playing the flute, and, I believe, writing poetry +in a very melancholy manner)--to quarrel with Dobbin for betraying his +secret. + +"Who the deuce asked you to talk about my affairs?" Osborne shouted +indignantly. "Why the devil is all the regiment to know that I am +going to be married? Why is that tattling old harridan, Peggy O'Dowd, +to make free with my name at her d--d supper-table, and advertise my +engagement over the three kingdoms? After all, what right have you to +say I am engaged, or to meddle in my business at all, Dobbin?" + +"It seems to me," Captain Dobbin began. + +"Seems be hanged, Dobbin," his junior interrupted him. "I am under +obligations to you, I know it, a d--d deal too well too; but I won't be +always sermonised by you because you're five years my senior. I'm +hanged if I'll stand your airs of superiority and infernal pity and +patronage. Pity and patronage! I should like to know in what I'm your +inferior?" + +"Are you engaged?" Captain Dobbin interposed. + +"What the devil's that to you or any one here if I am?" + +"Are you ashamed of it?" Dobbin resumed. + +"What right have you to ask me that question, sir? I should like to +know," George said. + +"Good God, you don't mean to say you want to break off?" asked Dobbin, +starting up. + +"In other words, you ask me if I'm a man of honour," said Osborne, +fiercely; "is that what you mean? You've adopted such a tone regarding +me lately that I'm ------ if I'll bear it any more." + +"What have I done? I've told you you were neglecting a sweet girl, +George. I've told you that when you go to town you ought to go to her, +and not to the gambling-houses about St. James's." + +"You want your money back, I suppose," said George, with a sneer. + +"Of course I do--I always did, didn't I?" says Dobbin. "You speak like +a generous fellow." + +"No, hang it, William, I beg your pardon"--here George interposed in a +fit of remorse; "you have been my friend in a hundred ways, Heaven +knows. You've got me out of a score of scrapes. When Crawley of the +Guards won that sum of money of me I should have been done but for you: +I know I should. But you shouldn't deal so hardly with me; you +shouldn't be always catechising me. I am very fond of Amelia; I adore +her, and that sort of thing. Don't look angry. She's faultless; I +know she is. But you see there's no fun in winning a thing unless you +play for it. Hang it: the regiment's just back from the West Indies, I +must have a little fling, and then when I'm married I'll reform; I will +upon my honour, now. And--I say--Dob--don't be angry with me, and +I'll give you a hundred next month, when I know my father will stand +something handsome; and I'll ask Heavytop for leave, and I'll go to +town, and see Amelia to-morrow--there now, will that satisfy you?" + +"It is impossible to be long angry with you, George," said the +good-natured Captain; "and as for the money, old boy, you know if I wanted +it you'd share your last shilling with me." + +"That I would, by Jove, Dobbin," George said, with the greatest +generosity, though by the way he never had any money to spare. + +"Only I wish you had sown those wild oats of yours, George. If you +could have seen poor little Miss Emmy's face when she asked me about +you the other day, you would have pitched those billiard-balls to the +deuce. Go and comfort her, you rascal. Go and write her a long +letter. Do something to make her happy; a very little will." + +"I believe she's d--d fond of me," the Lieutenant said, with a +self-satisfied air; and went off to finish the evening with some jolly +fellows in the mess-room. + +Amelia meanwhile, in Russell Square, was looking at the moon, which was +shining upon that peaceful spot, as well as upon the square of the +Chatham barracks, where Lieutenant Osborne was quartered, and thinking +to herself how her hero was employed. Perhaps he is visiting the +sentries, thought she; perhaps he is bivouacking; perhaps he is +attending the couch of a wounded comrade, or studying the art of war up +in his own desolate chamber. And her kind thoughts sped away as if they +were angels and had wings, and flying down the river to Chatham and +Rochester, strove to peep into the barracks where George was. . . . All +things considered, I think it was as well the gates were shut, and the +sentry allowed no one to pass; so that the poor little white-robed +angel could not hear the songs those young fellows were roaring over +the whisky-punch. + +The day after the little conversation at Chatham barracks, young +Osborne, to show that he would be as good as his word, prepared to go +to town, thereby incurring Captain Dobbin's applause. "I should have +liked to make her a little present," Osborne said to his friend in +confidence, "only I am quite out of cash until my father tips up." But +Dobbin would not allow this good nature and generosity to be balked, +and so accommodated Mr. Osborne with a few pound notes, which the +latter took after a little faint scruple. + +And I dare say he would have bought something very handsome for Amelia; +only, getting off the coach in Fleet Street, he was attracted by a +handsome shirt-pin in a jeweller's window, which he could not resist; +and having paid for that, had very little money to spare for indulging +in any further exercise of kindness. Never mind: you may be sure it +was not his presents Amelia wanted. When he came to Russell Square, +her face lighted up as if he had been sunshine. The little cares, +fears, tears, timid misgivings, sleepless fancies of I don't know how +many days and nights, were forgotten, under one moment's influence of +that familiar, irresistible smile. He beamed on her from the +drawing-room door--magnificent, with ambrosial whiskers, like a god. +Sambo, whose face as he announced Captain Osbin (having conferred a +brevet rank on that young officer) blazed with a sympathetic grin, saw +the little girl start, and flush, and jump up from her watching-place +in the window; and Sambo retreated: and as soon as the door was shut, +she went fluttering to Lieutenant George Osborne's heart as if it was +the only natural home for her to nestle in. Oh, thou poor panting +little soul! The very finest tree in the whole forest, with the +straightest stem, and the strongest arms, and the thickest foliage, +wherein you choose to build and coo, may be marked, for what you know, +and may be down with a crash ere long. What an old, old simile that +is, between man and timber! + +In the meanwhile, George kissed her very kindly on her forehead and +glistening eyes, and was very gracious and good; and she thought his +diamond shirt-pin (which she had not known him to wear before) the +prettiest ornament ever seen. + +The observant reader, who has marked our young Lieutenant's previous +behaviour, and has preserved our report of the brief conversation which +he has just had with Captain Dobbin, has possibly come to certain +conclusions regarding the character of Mr. Osborne. Some cynical +Frenchman has said that there are two parties to a love-transaction: +the one who loves and the other who condescends to be so treated. +Perhaps the love is occasionally on the man's side; perhaps on the +lady's. Perhaps some infatuated swain has ere this mistaken +insensibility for modesty, dulness for maiden reserve, mere vacuity for +sweet bashfulness, and a goose, in a word, for a swan. Perhaps some +beloved female subscriber has arrayed an ass in the splendour and glory +of her imagination; admired his dulness as manly simplicity; worshipped +his selfishness as manly superiority; treated his stupidity as majestic +gravity, and used him as the brilliant fairy Titania did a certain +weaver at Athens. I think I have seen such comedies of errors going on +in the world. But this is certain, that Amelia believed her lover to +be one of the most gallant and brilliant men in the empire: and it is +possible Lieutenant Osborne thought so too. + +He was a little wild: how many young men are; and don't girls like a +rake better than a milksop? He hadn't sown his wild oats as yet, but +he would soon: and quit the army now that peace was proclaimed; the +Corsican monster locked up at Elba; promotion by consequence over; and +no chance left for the display of his undoubted military talents and +valour: and his allowance, with Amelia's settlement, would enable them +to take a snug place in the country somewhere, in a good sporting +neighbourhood; and he would hunt a little, and farm a little; and they +would be very happy. As for remaining in the army as a married man, +that was impossible. Fancy Mrs. George Osborne in lodgings in a county +town; or, worse still, in the East or West Indies, with a society of +officers, and patronized by Mrs. Major O'Dowd! Amelia died with +laughing at Osborne's stories about Mrs. Major O'Dowd. He loved her +much too fondly to subject her to that horrid woman and her +vulgarities, and the rough treatment of a soldier's wife. He didn't +care for himself--not he; but his dear little girl should take the +place in society to which, as his wife, she was entitled: and to these +proposals you may be sure she acceded, as she would to any other from +the same author. + +Holding this kind of conversation, and building numberless castles in +the air (which Amelia adorned with all sorts of flower-gardens, rustic +walks, country churches, Sunday schools, and the like; while George had +his mind's eye directed to the stables, the kennel, and the cellar), +this young pair passed away a couple of hours very pleasantly; and as +the Lieutenant had only that single day in town, and a great deal of +most important business to transact, it was proposed that Miss Emmy +should dine with her future sisters-in-law. This invitation was +accepted joyfully. He conducted her to his sisters; where he left her +talking and prattling in a way that astonished those ladies, who +thought that George might make something of her; and he then went off +to transact his business. + +In a word, he went out and ate ices at a pastry-cook's shop in Charing +Cross; tried a new coat in Pall Mall; dropped in at the Old +Slaughters', and called for Captain Cannon; played eleven games at +billiards with the Captain, of which he won eight, and returned to +Russell Square half an hour late for dinner, but in very good humour. + +It was not so with old Mr. Osborne. When that gentleman came from the +City, and was welcomed in the drawing-room by his daughters and the +elegant Miss Wirt, they saw at once by his face--which was puffy, +solemn, and yellow at the best of times--and by the scowl and twitching +of his black eyebrows, that the heart within his large white waistcoat +was disturbed and uneasy. When Amelia stepped forward to salute him, +which she always did with great trembling and timidity, he gave a surly +grunt of recognition, and dropped the little hand out of his great +hirsute paw without any attempt to hold it there. He looked round +gloomily at his eldest daughter; who, comprehending the meaning of his +look, which asked unmistakably, "Why the devil is she here?" said at +once: + +"George is in town, Papa; and has gone to the Horse Guards, and will be +back to dinner." + +"O he is, is he? I won't have the dinner kept waiting for him, Jane"; +with which this worthy man lapsed into his particular chair, and then +the utter silence in his genteel, well-furnished drawing-room was only +interrupted by the alarmed ticking of the great French clock. + +When that chronometer, which was surmounted by a cheerful brass group +of the sacrifice of Iphigenia, tolled five in a heavy cathedral tone, +Mr. Osborne pulled the bell at his right hand--violently, and the +butler rushed up. + +"Dinner!" roared Mr. Osborne. + +"Mr. George isn't come in, sir," interposed the man. + +"Damn Mr. George, sir. Am I master of the house? DINNER!" Mr. Osborne +scowled. Amelia trembled. A telegraphic communication of eyes passed +between the other three ladies. The obedient bell in the lower regions +began ringing the announcement of the meal. The tolling over, the head +of the family thrust his hands into the great tail-pockets of his great +blue coat with brass buttons, and without waiting for a further +announcement strode downstairs alone, scowling over his shoulder at the +four females. + +"What's the matter now, my dear?" asked one of the other, as they rose +and tripped gingerly behind the sire. "I suppose the funds are +falling," whispered Miss Wirt; and so, trembling and in silence, this +hushed female company followed their dark leader. They took their +places in silence. He growled out a blessing, which sounded as gruffly +as a curse. The great silver dish-covers were removed. Amelia trembled +in her place, for she was next to the awful Osborne, and alone on her +side of the table--the gap being occasioned by the absence of George. + +"Soup?" says Mr. Osborne, clutching the ladle, fixing his eyes on her, +in a sepulchral tone; and having helped her and the rest, did not speak +for a while. + +"Take Miss Sedley's plate away," at last he said. "She can't eat the +soup--no more can I. It's beastly. Take away the soup, Hicks, and +to-morrow turn the cook out of the house, Jane." + +Having concluded his observations upon the soup, Mr. Osborne made a few +curt remarks respecting the fish, also of a savage and satirical +tendency, and cursed Billingsgate with an emphasis quite worthy of the +place. Then he lapsed into silence, and swallowed sundry glasses of +wine, looking more and more terrible, till a brisk knock at the door +told of George's arrival when everybody began to rally. + +"He could not come before. General Daguilet had kept him waiting at +the Horse Guards. Never mind soup or fish. Give him anything--he +didn't care what. Capital mutton--capital everything." His good humour +contrasted with his father's severity; and he rattled on unceasingly +during dinner, to the delight of all--of one especially, who need not +be mentioned. + +As soon as the young ladies had discussed the orange and the glass of +wine which formed the ordinary conclusion of the dismal banquets at Mr. +Osborne's house, the signal to make sail for the drawing-room was +given, and they all arose and departed. Amelia hoped George would soon +join them there. She began playing some of his favourite waltzes (then +newly imported) at the great carved-legged, leather-cased grand piano +in the drawing-room overhead. This little artifice did not bring him. +He was deaf to the waltzes; they grew fainter and fainter; the +discomfited performer left the huge instrument presently; and though +her three friends performed some of the loudest and most brilliant new +pieces of their repertoire, she did not hear a single note, but sate +thinking, and boding evil. Old Osborne's scowl, terrific always, had +never before looked so deadly to her. His eyes followed her out of the +room, as if she had been guilty of something. When they brought her +coffee, she started as though it were a cup of poison which Mr. Hicks, +the butler, wished to propose to her. What mystery was there lurking? +Oh, those women! They nurse and cuddle their presentiments, and make +darlings of their ugliest thoughts, as they do of their deformed +children. + +The gloom on the paternal countenance had also impressed George Osborne +with anxiety. With such eyebrows, and a look so decidedly bilious, how +was he to extract that money from the governor, of which George was +consumedly in want? He began praising his father's wine. That was +generally a successful means of cajoling the old gentleman. + +"We never got such Madeira in the West Indies, sir, as yours. Colonel +Heavytop took off three bottles of that you sent me down, under his +belt the other day." + +"Did he?" said the old gentleman. "It stands me in eight shillings a +bottle." + +"Will you take six guineas a dozen for it, sir?" said George, with a +laugh. "There's one of the greatest men in the kingdom wants some." + +"Does he?" growled the senior. "Wish he may get it." + +"When General Daguilet was at Chatham, sir, Heavytop gave him a +breakfast, and asked me for some of the wine. The General liked it +just as well--wanted a pipe for the Commander-in-Chief. He's his Royal +Highness's right-hand man." + +"It is devilish fine wine," said the Eyebrows, and they looked more +good-humoured; and George was going to take advantage of this +complacency, and bring the supply question on the mahogany, when the +father, relapsing into solemnity, though rather cordial in manner, bade +him ring the bell for claret. "And we'll see if that's as good as the +Madeira, George, to which his Royal Highness is welcome, I'm sure. And +as we are drinking it, I'll talk to you about a matter of importance." + +Amelia heard the claret bell ringing as she sat nervously upstairs. She +thought, somehow, it was a mysterious and presentimental bell. Of the +presentiments which some people are always having, some surely must +come right. + +"What I want to know, George," the old gentleman said, after slowly +smacking his first bumper--"what I want to know is, how you +and--ah--that little thing upstairs, are carrying on?" + +"I think, sir, it is not hard to see," George said, with a +self-satisfied grin. "Pretty clear, sir.--What capital wine!" + +"What d'you mean, pretty clear, sir?" + +"Why, hang it, sir, don't push me too hard. I'm a modest man. +I--ah--I don't set up to be a lady-killer; but I do own that she's as +devilish fond of me as she can be. Anybody can see that with half an +eye." + +"And you yourself?" + +"Why, sir, didn't you order me to marry her, and ain't I a good boy? +Haven't our Papas settled it ever so long?" + +"A pretty boy, indeed. Haven't I heard of your doings, sir, with Lord +Tarquin, Captain Crawley of the Guards, the Honourable Mr. Deuceace and +that set. Have a care sir, have a care." + +The old gentleman pronounced these aristocratic names with the greatest +gusto. Whenever he met a great man he grovelled before him, and +my-lorded him as only a free-born Briton can do. He came home and +looked out his history in the Peerage: he introduced his name into his +daily conversation; he bragged about his Lordship to his daughters. He +fell down prostrate and basked in him as a Neapolitan beggar does in +the sun. George was alarmed when he heard the names. He feared his +father might have been informed of certain transactions at play. But +the old moralist eased him by saying serenely: + +"Well, well, young men will be young men. And the comfort to me is, +George, that living in the best society in England, as I hope you do; +as I think you do; as my means will allow you to do--" + +"Thank you, sir," says George, making his point at once. "One can't +live with these great folks for nothing; and my purse, sir, look at +it"; and he held up a little token which had been netted by Amelia, and +contained the very last of Dobbin's pound notes. + +"You shan't want, sir. The British merchant's son shan't want, sir. My +guineas are as good as theirs, George, my boy; and I don't grudge 'em. +Call on Mr. Chopper as you go through the City to-morrow; he'll have +something for you. I don't grudge money when I know you're in good +society, because I know that good society can never go wrong. There's +no pride in me. I was a humbly born man--but you have had advantages. +Make a good use of 'em. Mix with the young nobility. There's many of +'em who can't spend a dollar to your guinea, my boy. And as for the +pink bonnets (here from under the heavy eyebrows there came a knowing +and not very pleasing leer)--why boys will be boys. Only there's one +thing I order you to avoid, which, if you do not, I'll cut you off with +a shilling, by Jove; and that's gambling." + +"Oh, of course, sir," said George. + +"But to return to the other business about Amelia: why shouldn't you +marry higher than a stockbroker's daughter, George--that's what I want +to know?" + +"It's a family business, sir," says George, cracking filberts. "You +and Mr. Sedley made the match a hundred years ago." + +"I don't deny it; but people's positions alter, sir. I don't deny that +Sedley made my fortune, or rather put me in the way of acquiring, by my +own talents and genius, that proud position, which, I may say, I occupy +in the tallow trade and the City of London. I've shown my gratitude to +Sedley; and he's tried it of late, sir, as my cheque-book can show. +George! I tell you in confidence I don't like the looks of Mr. +Sedley's affairs. My chief clerk, Mr. Chopper, does not like the looks +of 'em, and he's an old file, and knows 'Change as well as any man in +London. Hulker & Bullock are looking shy at him. He's been dabbling +on his own account I fear. They say the Jeune Amelie was his, which was +taken by the Yankee privateer Molasses. And that's flat--unless I see +Amelia's ten thousand down you don't marry her. I'll have no lame +duck's daughter in my family. Pass the wine, sir--or ring for coffee." + +With which Mr. Osborne spread out the evening paper, and George knew +from this signal that the colloquy was ended, and that his papa was +about to take a nap. + +He hurried upstairs to Amelia in the highest spirits. What was it that +made him more attentive to her on that night than he had been for a +long time--more eager to amuse her, more tender, more brilliant in +talk? Was it that his generous heart warmed to her at the prospect of +misfortune; or that the idea of losing the dear little prize made him +value it more? + +She lived upon the recollections of that happy evening for many days +afterwards, remembering his words; his looks; the song he sang; his +attitude, as he leant over her or looked at her from a distance. As it +seemed to her, no night ever passed so quickly at Mr. Osborne's house +before; and for once this young person was almost provoked to be angry +by the premature arrival of Mr. Sambo with her shawl. + +George came and took a tender leave of her the next morning; and then +hurried off to the City, where he visited Mr. Chopper, his father's +head man, and received from that gentleman a document which he +exchanged at Hulker & Bullock's for a whole pocketful of money. As +George entered the house, old John Sedley was passing out of the +banker's parlour, looking very dismal. But his godson was much too +elated to mark the worthy stockbroker's depression, or the dreary eyes +which the kind old gentleman cast upon him. Young Bullock did not come +grinning out of the parlour with him as had been his wont in former +years. + +And as the swinging doors of Hulker, Bullock & Co. closed upon Mr. +Sedley, Mr. Quill, the cashier (whose benevolent occupation it is to +hand out crisp bank-notes from a drawer and dispense sovereigns out of +a copper shovel), winked at Mr. Driver, the clerk at the desk on his +right. Mr. Driver winked again. + +"No go," Mr. D. whispered. + +"Not at no price," Mr. Q. said. "Mr. George Osborne, sir, how will +you take it?" George crammed eagerly a quantity of notes into his +pockets, and paid Dobbin fifty pounds that very evening at mess. + +That very evening Amelia wrote him the tenderest of long letters. Her +heart was overflowing with tenderness, but it still foreboded evil. +What was the cause of Mr. Osborne's dark looks? she asked. Had any +difference arisen between him and her papa? Her poor papa returned so +melancholy from the City, that all were alarmed about him at home--in +fine, there were four pages of loves and fears and hopes and +forebodings. + +"Poor little Emmy--dear little Emmy. How fond she is of me," George +said, as he perused the missive--"and Gad, what a headache that mixed +punch has given me!" Poor little Emmy, indeed. + + + +CHAPTER XIV + +Miss Crawley at Home + +About this time there drove up to an exceedingly snug and +well-appointed house in Park Lane, a travelling chariot with a lozenge on +the panels, a discontented female in a green veil and crimped curls on +the rumble, and a large and confidential man on the box. It was the +equipage of our friend Miss Crawley, returning from Hants. The +carriage windows were shut; the fat spaniel, whose head and tongue +ordinarily lolled out of one of them, reposed on the lap of the +discontented female. When the vehicle stopped, a large round bundle of +shawls was taken out of the carriage by the aid of various domestics +and a young lady who accompanied the heap of cloaks. That bundle +contained Miss Crawley, who was conveyed upstairs forthwith, and put +into a bed and chamber warmed properly as for the reception of an +invalid. Messengers went off for her physician and medical man. They +came, consulted, prescribed, vanished. The young companion of Miss +Crawley, at the conclusion of their interview, came in to receive their +instructions, and administered those antiphlogistic medicines which the +eminent men ordered. + +Captain Crawley of the Life Guards rode up from Knightsbridge Barracks +the next day; his black charger pawed the straw before his invalid +aunt's door. He was most affectionate in his inquiries regarding that +amiable relative. There seemed to be much source of apprehension. He +found Miss Crawley's maid (the discontented female) unusually sulky and +despondent; he found Miss Briggs, her dame de compagnie, in tears alone +in the drawing-room. She had hastened home, hearing of her beloved +friend's illness. She wished to fly to her couch, that couch which +she, Briggs, had so often smoothed in the hour of sickness. She was +denied admission to Miss Crawley's apartment. A stranger was +administering her medicines--a stranger from the country--an odious +Miss ... --tears choked the utterance of the dame de compagnie, and +she buried her crushed affections and her poor old red nose in her +pocket handkerchief. + +Rawdon Crawley sent up his name by the sulky femme de chambre, and Miss +Crawley's new companion, coming tripping down from the sick-room, put +a little hand into his as he stepped forward eagerly to meet her, gave +a glance of great scorn at the bewildered Briggs, and beckoning the +young Guardsman out of the back drawing-room, led him downstairs into +that now desolate dining-parlour, where so many a good dinner had been +celebrated. + +Here these two talked for ten minutes, discussing, no doubt, the +symptoms of the old invalid above stairs; at the end of which period +the parlour bell was rung briskly, and answered on that instant by Mr. +Bowls, Miss Crawley's large confidential butler (who, indeed, happened +to be at the keyhole during the most part of the interview); and the +Captain coming out, curling his mustachios, mounted the black charger +pawing among the straw, to the admiration of the little blackguard boys +collected in the street. He looked in at the dining-room window, +managing his horse, which curvetted and capered beautifully--for one +instant the young person might be seen at the window, when her figure +vanished, and, doubtless, she went upstairs again to resume the +affecting duties of benevolence. + +Who could this young woman be, I wonder? That evening a little dinner +for two persons was laid in the dining-room--when Mrs. Firkin, the +lady's maid, pushed into her mistress's apartment, and bustled about +there during the vacancy occasioned by the departure of the new +nurse--and the latter and Miss Briggs sat down to the neat little meal. + +Briggs was so much choked by emotion that she could hardly take a +morsel of meat. The young person carved a fowl with the utmost +delicacy, and asked so distinctly for egg-sauce, that poor Briggs, +before whom that delicious condiment was placed, started, made a great +clattering with the ladle, and once more fell back in the most gushing +hysterical state. + +"Had you not better give Miss Briggs a glass of wine?" said the person +to Mr. Bowls, the large confidential man. He did so. Briggs seized it +mechanically, gasped it down convulsively, moaned a little, and began +to play with the chicken on her plate. + +"I think we shall be able to help each other," said the person with +great suavity: "and shall have no need of Mr. Bowls's kind services. +Mr. Bowls, if you please, we will ring when we want you." He went +downstairs, where, by the way, he vented the most horrid curses upon +the unoffending footman, his subordinate. + +"It is a pity you take on so, Miss Briggs," the young lady said, with a +cool, slightly sarcastic, air. + +"My dearest friend is so ill, and wo-o-on't see me," gurgled out Briggs +in an agony of renewed grief. + +"She's not very ill any more. Console yourself, dear Miss Briggs. She +has only overeaten herself--that is all. She is greatly better. She +will soon be quite restored again. She is weak from being cupped and +from medical treatment, but she will rally immediately. Pray console +yourself, and take a little more wine." + +"But why, why won't she see me again?" Miss Briggs bleated out. "Oh, +Matilda, Matilda, after three-and-twenty years' tenderness! is this the +return to your poor, poor Arabella?" + +"Don't cry too much, poor Arabella," the other said (with ever so +little of a grin); "she only won't see you, because she says you don't +nurse her as well as I do. It's no pleasure to me to sit up all night. +I wish you might do it instead." + +"Have I not tended that dear couch for years?" Arabella said, "and +now--" + +"Now she prefers somebody else. Well, sick people have these fancies, +and must be humoured. When she's well I shall go." + +"Never, never," Arabella exclaimed, madly inhaling her salts-bottle. + +"Never be well or never go, Miss Briggs?" the other said, with the same +provoking good-nature. "Pooh--she will be well in a fortnight, when I +shall go back to my little pupils at Queen's Crawley, and to their +mother, who is a great deal more sick than our friend. You need not be +jealous about me, my dear Miss Briggs. I am a poor little girl without +any friends, or any harm in me. I don't want to supplant you in Miss +Crawley's good graces. She will forget me a week after I am gone: and +her affection for you has been the work of years. Give me a little +wine if you please, my dear Miss Briggs, and let us be friends. I'm +sure I want friends." + +The placable and soft-hearted Briggs speechlessly pushed out her hand +at this appeal; but she felt the desertion most keenly for all that, +and bitterly, bitterly moaned the fickleness of her Matilda. At the end +of half an hour, the meal over, Miss Rebecca Sharp (for such, +astonishing to state, is the name of her who has been described +ingeniously as "the person" hitherto), went upstairs again to her +patient's rooms, from which, with the most engaging politeness, she +eliminated poor Firkin. "Thank you, Mrs. Firkin, that will quite do; +how nicely you make it! I will ring when anything is wanted." "Thank +you"; and Firkin came downstairs in a tempest of jealousy, only the +more dangerous because she was forced to confine it in her own bosom. + +Could it be the tempest which, as she passed the landing of the first +floor, blew open the drawing-room door? No; it was stealthily opened by +the hand of Briggs. Briggs had been on the watch. Briggs too well heard +the creaking Firkin descend the stairs, and the clink of the spoon and +gruel-basin the neglected female carried. + +"Well, Firkin?" says she, as the other entered the apartment. "Well, +Jane?" + +"Wuss and wuss, Miss B.," Firkin said, wagging her head. + +"Is she not better then?" + +"She never spoke but once, and I asked her if she felt a little more +easy, and she told me to hold my stupid tongue. Oh, Miss B., I never +thought to have seen this day!" And the water-works again began to +play. + +"What sort of a person is this Miss Sharp, Firkin? I little thought, +while enjoying my Christmas revels in the elegant home of my firm +friends, the Reverend Lionel Delamere and his amiable lady, to find a +stranger had taken my place in the affections of my dearest, my still +dearest Matilda!" Miss Briggs, it will be seen by her language, was of +a literary and sentimental turn, and had once published a volume of +poems--"Trills of the Nightingale"--by subscription. + +"Miss B., they are all infatyated about that young woman," Firkin +replied. "Sir Pitt wouldn't have let her go, but he daredn't refuse +Miss Crawley anything. Mrs. Bute at the Rectory jist as bad--never +happy out of her sight. The Capting quite wild about her. Mr. Crawley +mortial jealous. Since Miss C. was took ill, she won't have nobody near +her but Miss Sharp, I can't tell for where nor for why; and I think +somethink has bewidged everybody." + +Rebecca passed that night in constant watching upon Miss Crawley; the +next night the old lady slept so comfortably, that Rebecca had time for +several hours' comfortable repose herself on the sofa, at the foot of +her patroness's bed; very soon, Miss Crawley was so well that she sat +up and laughed heartily at a perfect imitation of Miss Briggs and her +grief, which Rebecca described to her. Briggs' weeping snuffle, and her +manner of using the handkerchief, were so completely rendered that Miss +Crawley became quite cheerful, to the admiration of the doctors when +they visited her, who usually found this worthy woman of the world, +when the least sickness attacked her, under the most abject depression +and terror of death. + +Captain Crawley came every day, and received bulletins from Miss +Rebecca respecting his aunt's health. This improved so rapidly, that +poor Briggs was allowed to see her patroness; and persons with tender +hearts may imagine the smothered emotions of that sentimental female, +and the affecting nature of the interview. + +Miss Crawley liked to have Briggs in a good deal soon. Rebecca used to +mimic her to her face with the most admirable gravity, thereby +rendering the imitation doubly piquant to her worthy patroness. + +The causes which had led to the deplorable illness of Miss Crawley, and +her departure from her brother's house in the country, were of such an +unromantic nature that they are hardly fit to be explained in this +genteel and sentimental novel. For how is it possible to hint of a +delicate female, living in good society, that she ate and drank too +much, and that a hot supper of lobsters profusely enjoyed at the +Rectory was the reason of an indisposition which Miss Crawley herself +persisted was solely attributable to the dampness of the weather? The +attack was so sharp that Matilda--as his Reverence expressed it--was +very nearly "off the hooks"; all the family were in a fever of +expectation regarding the will, and Rawdon Crawley was making sure of +at least forty thousand pounds before the commencement of the London +season. Mr. Crawley sent over a choice parcel of tracts, to prepare +her for the change from Vanity Fair and Park Lane for another world; +but a good doctor from Southampton being called in in time, vanquished +the lobster which was so nearly fatal to her, and gave her sufficient +strength to enable her to return to London. The Baronet did not +disguise his exceeding mortification at the turn which affairs took. + +While everybody was attending on Miss Crawley, and messengers every +hour from the Rectory were carrying news of her health to the +affectionate folks there, there was a lady in another part of the +house, being exceedingly ill, of whom no one took any notice at all; +and this was the lady of Crawley herself. The good doctor shook his +head after seeing her; to which visit Sir Pitt consented, as it could +be paid without a fee; and she was left fading away in her lonely +chamber, with no more heed paid to her than to a weed in the park. + +The young ladies, too, lost much of the inestimable benefit of their +governess's instruction, So affectionate a nurse was Miss Sharp, that +Miss Crawley would take her medicines from no other hand. Firkin had +been deposed long before her mistress's departure from the country. +That faithful attendant found a gloomy consolation on returning to +London, in seeing Miss Briggs suffer the same pangs of jealousy and +undergo the same faithless treatment to which she herself had been +subject. + +Captain Rawdon got an extension of leave on his aunt's illness, and +remained dutifully at home. He was always in her antechamber. (She +lay sick in the state bedroom, into which you entered by the little +blue saloon.) His father was always meeting him there; or if he came +down the corridor ever so quietly, his father's door was sure to open, +and the hyena face of the old gentleman to glare out. What was it set +one to watch the other so? A generous rivalry, no doubt, as to which +should be most attentive to the dear sufferer in the state bedroom. +Rebecca used to come out and comfort both of them; or one or the other +of them rather. Both of these worthy gentlemen were most anxious to +have news of the invalid from her little confidential messenger. + +At dinner--to which meal she descended for half an hour--she kept the +peace between them: after which she disappeared for the night; when +Rawdon would ride over to the depot of the 150th at Mudbury, leaving +his papa to the society of Mr. Horrocks and his rum and water. She +passed as weary a fortnight as ever mortal spent in Miss Crawley's +sick-room; but her little nerves seemed to be of iron, as she was quite +unshaken by the duty and the tedium of the sick-chamber. + +She never told until long afterwards how painful that duty was; how +peevish a patient was the jovial old lady; how angry; how sleepless; in +what horrors of death; during what long nights she lay moaning, and in +almost delirious agonies respecting that future world which she quite +ignored when she was in good health.--Picture to yourself, oh fair +young reader, a worldly, selfish, graceless, thankless, religionless +old woman, writhing in pain and fear, and without her wig. Picture her +to yourself, and ere you be old, learn to love and pray! + +Sharp watched this graceless bedside with indomitable patience. Nothing +escaped her; and, like a prudent steward, she found a use for +everything. She told many a good story about Miss Crawley's illness in +after days--stories which made the lady blush through her artificial +carnations. During the illness she was never out of temper; always +alert; she slept light, having a perfectly clear conscience; and could +take that refreshment at almost any minute's warning. And so you saw +very few traces of fatigue in her appearance. Her face might be a +trifle paler, and the circles round her eyes a little blacker than +usual; but whenever she came out from the sick-room she was always +smiling, fresh, and neat, and looked as trim in her little +dressing-gown and cap, as in her smartest evening suit. + +The Captain thought so, and raved about her in uncouth convulsions. The +barbed shaft of love had penetrated his dull hide. Six +weeks--appropinquity--opportunity--had victimised him completely. He +made a confidante of his aunt at the Rectory, of all persons in the +world. She rallied him about it; she had perceived his folly; she +warned him; she finished by owning that little Sharp was the most clever, +droll, odd, good-natured, simple, kindly creature in England. Rawdon +must not trifle with her affections, though--dear Miss Crawley would +never pardon him for that; for she, too, was quite overcome by the little +governess, and loved Sharp like a daughter. Rawdon must go away--go +back to his regiment and naughty London, and not play with a poor +artless girl's feelings. + +Many and many a time this good-natured lady, compassionating the +forlorn life-guardsman's condition, gave him an opportunity of seeing +Miss Sharp at the Rectory, and of walking home with her, as we have +seen. When men of a certain sort, ladies, are in love, though they see +the hook and the string, and the whole apparatus with which they are to +be taken, they gorge the bait nevertheless--they must come to it--they +must swallow it--and are presently struck and landed gasping. Rawdon +saw there was a manifest intention on Mrs. Bute's part to captivate him +with Rebecca. He was not very wise; but he was a man about town, and +had seen several seasons. A light dawned upon his dusky soul, as he +thought, through a speech of Mrs. Bute's. + +"Mark my words, Rawdon," she said. "You will have Miss Sharp one day +for your relation." + +"What relation--my cousin, hey, Mrs. Bute? James sweet on her, hey?" +inquired the waggish officer. + +"More than that," Mrs. Bute said, with a flash from her black eyes. + +"Not Pitt? He sha'n't have her. The sneak a'n't worthy of her. He's +booked to Lady Jane Sheepshanks." + +"You men perceive nothing. You silly, blind creature--if anything +happens to Lady Crawley, Miss Sharp will be your mother-in-law; and +that's what will happen." + +Rawdon Crawley, Esquire, gave vent to a prodigious whistle, in token of +astonishment at this announcement. He couldn't deny it. His father's +evident liking for Miss Sharp had not escaped him. He knew the old +gentleman's character well; and a more unscrupulous old--whyou--he did +not conclude the sentence, but walked home, curling his mustachios, and +convinced he had found a clue to Mrs. Bute's mystery. + +"By Jove, it's too bad," thought Rawdon, "too bad, by Jove! I do +believe the woman wants the poor girl to be ruined, in order that she +shouldn't come into the family as Lady Crawley." + +When he saw Rebecca alone, he rallied her about his father's attachment +in his graceful way. She flung up her head scornfully, looked him full +in the face, and said, + +"Well, suppose he is fond of me. I know he is, and others too. You +don't think I am afraid of him, Captain Crawley? You don't suppose I +can't defend my own honour," said the little woman, looking as stately +as a queen. + +"Oh, ah, why--give you fair warning--look out, you know--that's all," +said the mustachio-twiddler. + +"You hint at something not honourable, then?" said she, flashing out. + +"O Gad--really--Miss Rebecca," the heavy dragoon interposed. + +"Do you suppose I have no feeling of self-respect, because I am poor +and friendless, and because rich people have none? Do you think, +because I am a governess, I have not as much sense, and feeling, and +good breeding as you gentlefolks in Hampshire? I'm a Montmorency. Do +you suppose a Montmorency is not as good as a Crawley?" + +When Miss Sharp was agitated, and alluded to her maternal relatives, +she spoke with ever so slight a foreign accent, which gave a great +charm to her clear ringing voice. "No," she continued, kindling as she +spoke to the Captain; "I can endure poverty, but not shame--neglect, +but not insult; and insult from--from you." + +Her feelings gave way, and she burst into tears. + +"Hang it, Miss Sharp--Rebecca--by Jove--upon my soul, I wouldn't for a +thousand pounds. Stop, Rebecca!" + +She was gone. She drove out with Miss Crawley that day. It was before +the latter's illness. At dinner she was unusually brilliant and +lively; but she would take no notice of the hints, or the nods, or the +clumsy expostulations of the humiliated, infatuated guardsman. +Skirmishes of this sort passed perpetually during the little +campaign--tedious to relate, and similar in result. The Crawley heavy +cavalry was maddened by defeat, and routed every day. + +If the Baronet of Queen's Crawley had not had the fear of losing his +sister's legacy before his eyes, he never would have permitted his dear +girls to lose the educational blessings which their invaluable +governess was conferring upon them. The old house at home seemed a +desert without her, so useful and pleasant had Rebecca made herself +there. Sir Pitt's letters were not copied and corrected; his books not +made up; his household business and manifold schemes neglected, now +that his little secretary was away. And it was easy to see how +necessary such an amanuensis was to him, by the tenor and spelling of +the numerous letters which he sent to her, entreating her and +commanding her to return. Almost every day brought a frank from the +Baronet, enclosing the most urgent prayers to Becky for her return, or +conveying pathetic statements to Miss Crawley, regarding the neglected +state of his daughters' education; of which documents Miss Crawley took +very little heed. + +Miss Briggs was not formally dismissed, but her place as companion was +a sinecure and a derision; and her company was the fat spaniel in the +drawing-room, or occasionally the discontented Firkin in the +housekeeper's closet. Nor though the old lady would by no means hear +of Rebecca's departure, was the latter regularly installed in office in +Park Lane. Like many wealthy people, it was Miss Crawley's habit to +accept as much service as she could get from her inferiors; and +good-naturedly to take leave of them when she no longer found them +useful. Gratitude among certain rich folks is scarcely natural or to +be thought of. They take needy people's services as their due. Nor +have you, O poor parasite and humble hanger-on, much reason to +complain! Your friendship for Dives is about as sincere as the return +which it usually gets. It is money you love, and not the man; and were +Croesus and his footman to change places you know, you poor rogue, who +would have the benefit of your allegiance. + +And I am not sure that, in spite of Rebecca's simplicity and activity, +and gentleness and untiring good humour, the shrewd old London lady, +upon whom these treasures of friendship were lavished, had not a +lurking suspicion all the while of her affectionate nurse and friend. +It must have often crossed Miss Crawley's mind that nobody does +anything for nothing. If she measured her own feeling towards the +world, she must have been pretty well able to gauge those of the world +towards herself; and perhaps she reflected that it is the ordinary lot +of people to have no friends if they themselves care for nobody. + +Well, meanwhile Becky was the greatest comfort and convenience to her, +and she gave her a couple of new gowns, and an old necklace and shawl, +and showed her friendship by abusing all her intimate acquaintances to +her new confidante (than which there can't be a more touching proof of +regard), and meditated vaguely some great future benefit--to marry her +perhaps to Clump, the apothecary, or to settle her in some advantageous +way of life; or at any rate, to send her back to Queen's Crawley when +she had done with her, and the full London season had begun. + +When Miss Crawley was convalescent and descended to the drawing-room, +Becky sang to her, and otherwise amused her; when she was well enough +to drive out, Becky accompanied her. And amongst the drives which they +took, whither, of all places in the world, did Miss Crawley's admirable +good-nature and friendship actually induce her to penetrate, but to +Russell Square, Bloomsbury, and the house of John Sedley, Esquire. + +Ere that event, many notes had passed, as may be imagined, between the +two dear friends. During the months of Rebecca's stay in Hampshire, +the eternal friendship had (must it be owned?) suffered considerable +diminution, and grown so decrepit and feeble with old age as to +threaten demise altogether. The fact is, both girls had their own real +affairs to think of: Rebecca her advance with her employers--Amelia her +own absorbing topic. When the two girls met, and flew into each +other's arms with that impetuosity which distinguishes the behaviour of +young ladies towards each other, Rebecca performed her part of the +embrace with the most perfect briskness and energy. Poor little Amelia +blushed as she kissed her friend, and thought she had been guilty of +something very like coldness towards her. + +Their first interview was but a very short one. Amelia was just ready +to go out for a walk. Miss Crawley was waiting in her carriage below, +her people wondering at the locality in which they found themselves, +and gazing upon honest Sambo, the black footman of Bloomsbury, as one +of the queer natives of the place. But when Amelia came down with her +kind smiling looks (Rebecca must introduce her to her friend, Miss +Crawley was longing to see her, and was too ill to leave her +carriage)--when, I say, Amelia came down, the Park Lane shoulder-knot +aristocracy wondered more and more that such a thing could come out of +Bloomsbury; and Miss Crawley was fairly captivated by the sweet +blushing face of the young lady who came forward so timidly and so +gracefully to pay her respects to the protector of her friend. + +"What a complexion, my dear! What a sweet voice!" Miss Crawley said, as +they drove away westward after the little interview. "My dear Sharp, +your young friend is charming. Send for her to Park Lane, do you +hear?" Miss Crawley had a good taste. She liked natural manners--a +little timidity only set them off. She liked pretty faces near her; as +she liked pretty pictures and nice china. She talked of Amelia with +rapture half a dozen times that day. She mentioned her to Rawdon +Crawley, who came dutifully to partake of his aunt's chicken. + +Of course, on this Rebecca instantly stated that Amelia was engaged to +be married--to a Lieutenant Osborne--a very old flame. + +"Is he a man in a line-regiment?" Captain Crawley asked, remembering +after an effort, as became a guardsman, the number of the regiment, +the --th. + +Rebecca thought that was the regiment. "The Captain's name," she said, +"was Captain Dobbin." + +"A lanky gawky fellow," said Crawley, "tumbles over everybody. I know +him; and Osborne's a goodish-looking fellow, with large black whiskers?" + +"Enormous," Miss Rebecca Sharp said, "and enormously proud of them, I +assure you." + +Captain Rawdon Crawley burst into a horse-laugh by way of reply; and +being pressed by the ladies to explain, did so when the explosion of +hilarity was over. "He fancies he can play at billiards," said he. "I +won two hundred of him at the Cocoa-Tree. HE play, the young flat! +He'd have played for anything that day, but his friend Captain Dobbin +carried him off, hang him!" + +"Rawdon, Rawdon, don't be so wicked," Miss Crawley remarked, highly +pleased. + +"Why, ma'am, of all the young fellows I've seen out of the line, I +think this fellow's the greenest. Tarquin and Deuceace get what money +they like out of him. He'd go to the deuce to be seen with a lord. He +pays their dinners at Greenwich, and they invite the company." + +"And very pretty company too, I dare say." + +"Quite right, Miss Sharp. Right, as usual, Miss Sharp. Uncommon pretty +company--haw, haw!" and the Captain laughed more and more, thinking he +had made a good joke. + +"Rawdon, don't be naughty!" his aunt exclaimed. + +"Well, his father's a City man--immensely rich, they say. Hang those +City fellows, they must bleed; and I've not done with him yet, I can +tell you. Haw, haw!" + +"Fie, Captain Crawley; I shall warn Amelia. A gambling husband!" + +"Horrid, ain't he, hey?" the Captain said with great solemnity; and +then added, a sudden thought having struck him: "Gad, I say, ma'am, +we'll have him here." + +"Is he a presentable sort of a person?" the aunt inquired. + +"Presentable?--oh, very well. You wouldn't see any difference," +Captain Crawley answered. "Do let's have him, when you begin to see a +few people; and his whatdyecallem--his inamorato--eh, Miss Sharp; +that's what you call it--comes. Gad, I'll write him a note, and have +him; and I'll try if he can play piquet as well as billiards. Where +does he live, Miss Sharp?" + +Miss Sharp told Crawley the Lieutenant's town address; and a few days +after this conversation, Lieutenant Osborne received a letter, in +Captain Rawdon's schoolboy hand, and enclosing a note of invitation +from Miss Crawley. + +Rebecca despatched also an invitation to her darling Amelia, who, you +may be sure, was ready enough to accept it when she heard that George +was to be of the party. It was arranged that Amelia was to spend the +morning with the ladies of Park Lane, where all were very kind to her. +Rebecca patronised her with calm superiority: she was so much the +cleverer of the two, and her friend so gentle and unassuming, that she +always yielded when anybody chose to command, and so took Rebecca's +orders with perfect meekness and good humour. Miss Crawley's +graciousness was also remarkable. She continued her raptures about +little Amelia, talked about her before her face as if she were a doll, +or a servant, or a picture, and admired her with the most benevolent +wonder possible. I admire that admiration which the genteel world +sometimes extends to the commonalty. There is no more agreeable object +in life than to see Mayfair folks condescending. Miss Crawley's +prodigious benevolence rather fatigued poor little Amelia, and I am not +sure that of the three ladies in Park Lane she did not find honest Miss +Briggs the most agreeable. She sympathised with Briggs as with all +neglected or gentle people: she wasn't what you call a woman of spirit. + +George came to dinner--a repast en garcon with Captain Crawley. + +The great family coach of the Osbornes transported him to Park Lane +from Russell Square; where the young ladies, who were not themselves +invited, and professed the greatest indifference at that slight, +nevertheless looked at Sir Pitt Crawley's name in the baronetage; and +learned everything which that work had to teach about the Crawley +family and their pedigree, and the Binkies, their relatives, &c., &c. +Rawdon Crawley received George Osborne with great frankness and +graciousness: praised his play at billiards: asked him when he would +have his revenge: was interested about Osborne's regiment: and would +have proposed piquet to him that very evening, but Miss Crawley +absolutely forbade any gambling in her house; so that the young +Lieutenant's purse was not lightened by his gallant patron, for that +day at least. However, they made an engagement for the next, +somewhere: to look at a horse that Crawley had to sell, and to try him +in the Park; and to dine together, and to pass the evening with some +jolly fellows. "That is, if you're not on duty to that pretty Miss +Sedley," Crawley said, with a knowing wink. "Monstrous nice girl, 'pon +my honour, though, Osborne," he was good enough to add. "Lots of tin, +I suppose, eh?" + +Osborne wasn't on duty; he would join Crawley with pleasure: and the +latter, when they met the next day, praised his new friend's +horsemanship--as he might with perfect honesty--and introduced him to +three or four young men of the first fashion, whose acquaintance +immensely elated the simple young officer. + +"How's little Miss Sharp, by-the-bye?" Osborne inquired of his friend +over their wine, with a dandified air. "Good-natured little girl that. +Does she suit you well at Queen's Crawley? Miss Sedley liked her a good +deal last year." + +Captain Crawley looked savagely at the Lieutenant out of his little +blue eyes, and watched him when he went up to resume his acquaintance +with the fair governess. Her conduct must have relieved Crawley if +there was any jealousy in the bosom of that life-guardsman. + +When the young men went upstairs, and after Osborne's introduction to +Miss Crawley, he walked up to Rebecca with a patronising, easy swagger. +He was going to be kind to her and protect her. He would even shake +hands with her, as a friend of Amelia's; and saying, "Ah, Miss Sharp! +how-dy-doo?" held out his left hand towards her, expecting that she +would be quite confounded at the honour. + +Miss Sharp put out her right forefinger, and gave him a little nod, so +cool and killing, that Rawdon Crawley, watching the operations from the +other room, could hardly restrain his laughter as he saw the +Lieutenant's entire discomfiture; the start he gave, the pause, and the +perfect clumsiness with which he at length condescended to take the +finger which was offered for his embrace. + +"She'd beat the devil, by Jove!" the Captain said, in a rapture; and +the Lieutenant, by way of beginning the conversation, agreeably asked +Rebecca how she liked her new place. + +"My place?" said Miss Sharp, coolly, "how kind of you to remind me of +it! It's a tolerably good place: the wages are pretty good--not so +good as Miss Wirt's, I believe, with your sisters in Russell Square. +How are those young ladies?--not that I ought to ask." + +"Why not?" Mr. Osborne said, amazed. + +"Why, they never condescended to speak to me, or to ask me into their +house, whilst I was staying with Amelia; but we poor governesses, you +know, are used to slights of this sort." + +"My dear Miss Sharp!" Osborne ejaculated. + +"At least in some families," Rebecca continued. "You can't think what +a difference there is though. We are not so wealthy in Hampshire as +you lucky folks of the City. But then I am in a gentleman's +family--good old English stock. I suppose you know Sir Pitt's father +refused a peerage. And you see how I am treated. I am pretty +comfortable. Indeed it is rather a good place. But how very good of +you to inquire!" + +Osborne was quite savage. The little governess patronised him and +persiffled him until this young British Lion felt quite uneasy; nor +could he muster sufficient presence of mind to find a pretext for +backing out of this most delectable conversation. + +"I thought you liked the City families pretty well," he said, haughtily. + +"Last year you mean, when I was fresh from that horrid vulgar school? +Of course I did. Doesn't every girl like to come home for the +holidays? And how was I to know any better? But oh, Mr. Osborne, what +a difference eighteen months' experience makes! eighteen months spent, +pardon me for saying so, with gentlemen. As for dear Amelia, she, I +grant you, is a pearl, and would be charming anywhere. There now, I +see you are beginning to be in a good humour; but oh these queer odd +City people! And Mr. Jos--how is that wonderful Mr. Joseph?" + +"It seems to me you didn't dislike that wonderful Mr. Joseph last +year," Osborne said kindly. + +"How severe of you! Well, entre nous, I didn't break my heart about +him; yet if he had asked me to do what you mean by your looks (and very +expressive and kind they are, too), I wouldn't have said no." + +Mr. Osborne gave a look as much as to say, "Indeed, how very obliging!" + +"What an honour to have had you for a brother-in-law, you are thinking? +To be sister-in-law to George Osborne, Esquire, son of John Osborne, +Esquire, son of--what was your grandpapa, Mr. Osborne? Well, don't be +angry. You can't help your pedigree, and I quite agree with you that I +would have married Mr. Joe Sedley; for could a poor penniless girl do +better? Now you know the whole secret. I'm frank and open; +considering all things, it was very kind of you to allude to the +circumstance--very kind and polite. Amelia dear, Mr. Osborne and I +were talking about your poor brother Joseph. How is he?" + +Thus was George utterly routed. Not that Rebecca was in the right; but +she had managed most successfully to put him in the wrong. And he now +shamefully fled, feeling, if he stayed another minute, that he would +have been made to look foolish in the presence of Amelia. + +Though Rebecca had had the better of him, George was above the meanness +of talebearing or revenge upon a lady--only he could not help cleverly +confiding to Captain Crawley, next day, some notions of his regarding +Miss Rebecca--that she was a sharp one, a dangerous one, a desperate +flirt, &c.; in all of which opinions Crawley agreed laughingly, and +with every one of which Miss Rebecca was made acquainted before +twenty-four hours were over. They added to her original regard for Mr. +Osborne. Her woman's instinct had told her that it was George who had +interrupted the success of her first love-passage, and she esteemed him +accordingly. + +"I only just warn you," he said to Rawdon Crawley, with a knowing +look--he had bought the horse, and lost some score of guineas after +dinner, "I just warn you--I know women, and counsel you to be on the +look-out." + +"Thank you, my boy," said Crawley, with a look of peculiar gratitude. +"You're wide awake, I see." And George went off, thinking Crawley was +quite right. + +He told Amelia of what he had done, and how he had counselled Rawdon +Crawley--a devilish good, straightforward fellow--to be on his guard +against that little sly, scheming Rebecca. + +"Against whom?" Amelia cried. + +"Your friend the governess.--Don't look so astonished." + +"O George, what have you done?" Amelia said. For her woman's eyes, +which Love had made sharp-sighted, had in one instant discovered a +secret which was invisible to Miss Crawley, to poor virgin Briggs, and +above all, to the stupid peepers of that young whiskered prig, +Lieutenant Osborne. + +For as Rebecca was shawling her in an upper apartment, where these two +friends had an opportunity for a little of that secret talking and +conspiring which form the delight of female life, Amelia, coming up to +Rebecca, and taking her two little hands in hers, said, "Rebecca, I see +it all." + +Rebecca kissed her. + +And regarding this delightful secret, not one syllable more was said by +either of the young women. But it was destined to come out before long. + +Some short period after the above events, and Miss Rebecca Sharp still +remaining at her patroness's house in Park Lane, one more hatchment +might have been seen in Great Gaunt Street, figuring amongst the many +which usually ornament that dismal quarter. It was over Sir Pitt +Crawley's house; but it did not indicate the worthy baronet's demise. +It was a feminine hatchment, and indeed a few years back had served as +a funeral compliment to Sir Pitt's old mother, the late dowager Lady +Crawley. Its period of service over, the hatchment had come down from +the front of the house, and lived in retirement somewhere in the back +premises of Sir Pitt's mansion. It reappeared now for poor Rose Dawson. +Sir Pitt was a widower again. The arms quartered on the shield along +with his own were not, to be sure, poor Rose's. She had no arms. But +the cherubs painted on the scutcheon answered as well for her as for +Sir Pitt's mother, and Resurgam was written under the coat, flanked by +the Crawley Dove and Serpent. Arms and Hatchments, Resurgam.--Here is +an opportunity for moralising! + +Mr. Crawley had tended that otherwise friendless bedside. She went out +of the world strengthened by such words and comfort as he could give +her. For many years his was the only kindness she ever knew; the only +friendship that solaced in any way that feeble, lonely soul. Her heart +was dead long before her body. She had sold it to become Sir Pitt +Crawley's wife. Mothers and daughters are making the same bargain +every day in Vanity Fair. + +When the demise took place, her husband was in London attending to some +of his innumerable schemes, and busy with his endless lawyers. He had +found time, nevertheless, to call often in Park Lane, and to despatch +many notes to Rebecca, entreating her, enjoining her, commanding her to +return to her young pupils in the country, who were now utterly without +companionship during their mother's illness. But Miss Crawley would +not hear of her departure; for though there was no lady of fashion in +London who would desert her friends more complacently as soon as she +was tired of their society, and though few tired of them sooner, yet as +long as her engoument lasted her attachment was prodigious, and she +clung still with the greatest energy to Rebecca. + +The news of Lady Crawley's death provoked no more grief or comment than +might have been expected in Miss Crawley's family circle. "I suppose I +must put off my party for the 3rd," Miss Crawley said; and added, after +a pause, "I hope my brother will have the decency not to marry again." +"What a confounded rage Pitt will be in if he does," Rawdon remarked, +with his usual regard for his elder brother. Rebecca said nothing. She +seemed by far the gravest and most impressed of the family. She left +the room before Rawdon went away that day; but they met by chance +below, as he was going away after taking leave, and had a parley +together. + +On the morrow, as Rebecca was gazing from the window, she startled Miss +Crawley, who was placidly occupied with a French novel, by crying out +in an alarmed tone, "Here's Sir Pitt, Ma'am!" and the Baronet's knock +followed this announcement. + +"My dear, I can't see him. I won't see him. Tell Bowls not at home, +or go downstairs and say I'm too ill to receive any one. My nerves +really won't bear my brother at this moment," cried out Miss Crawley, +and resumed the novel. + +"She's too ill to see you, sir," Rebecca said, tripping down to Sir +Pitt, who was preparing to ascend. + +"So much the better," Sir Pitt answered. "I want to see YOU, Miss +Becky. Come along a me into the parlour," and they entered that +apartment together. + +"I wawnt you back at Queen's Crawley, Miss," the baronet said, fixing +his eyes upon her, and taking off his black gloves and his hat with its +great crape hat-band. His eyes had such a strange look, and fixed upon +her so steadfastly, that Rebecca Sharp began almost to tremble. + +"I hope to come soon," she said in a low voice, "as soon as Miss +Crawley is better--and return to--to the dear children." + +"You've said so these three months, Becky," replied Sir Pitt, "and +still you go hanging on to my sister, who'll fling you off like an old +shoe, when she's wore you out. I tell you I want you. I'm going back +to the Vuneral. Will you come back? Yes or no?" + +"I daren't--I don't think--it would be right--to be alone--with you, +sir," Becky said, seemingly in great agitation. + +"I say agin, I want you," Sir Pitt said, thumping the table. "I can't +git on without you. I didn't see what it was till you went away. The +house all goes wrong. It's not the same place. All my accounts has +got muddled agin. You MUST come back. Do come back. Dear Becky, do +come." + +"Come--as what, sir?" Rebecca gasped out. + +"Come as Lady Crawley, if you like," the Baronet said, grasping his +crape hat. "There! will that zatusfy you? Come back and be my wife. +Your vit vor't. Birth be hanged. You're as good a lady as ever I see. +You've got more brains in your little vinger than any baronet's wife in +the county. Will you come? Yes or no?" + +"Oh, Sir Pitt!" Rebecca said, very much moved. + +"Say yes, Becky," Sir Pitt continued. "I'm an old man, but a good'n. +I'm good for twenty years. I'll make you happy, zee if I don't. You +shall do what you like; spend what you like; and 'ave it all your own +way. I'll make you a zettlement. I'll do everything reglar. Look +year!" and the old man fell down on his knees and leered at her like a +satyr. + +Rebecca started back a picture of consternation. In the course of this +history we have never seen her lose her presence of mind; but she did +now, and wept some of the most genuine tears that ever fell from her +eyes. + +"Oh, Sir Pitt!" she said. "Oh, sir--I--I'm married ALREADY." + + + +CHAPTER XV + +In Which Rebecca's Husband Appears for a Short Time + +Every reader of a sentimental turn (and we desire no other) must have +been pleased with the tableau with which the last act of our little +drama concluded; for what can be prettier than an image of Love on his +knees before Beauty? + +But when Love heard that awful confession from Beauty that she was +married already, he bounced up from his attitude of humility on the +carpet, uttering exclamations which caused poor little Beauty to be +more frightened than she was when she made her avowal. "Married; +you're joking," the Baronet cried, after the first explosion of rage +and wonder. "You're making vun of me, Becky. Who'd ever go to marry +you without a shilling to your vortune?" + +"Married! married!" Rebecca said, in an agony of tears--her voice +choking with emotion, her handkerchief up to her ready eyes, fainting +against the mantelpiece a figure of woe fit to melt the most obdurate +heart. "O Sir Pitt, dear Sir Pitt, do not think me ungrateful for all +your goodness to me. It is only your generosity that has extorted my +secret." + +"Generosity be hanged!" Sir Pitt roared out. "Who is it tu, then, +you're married? Where was it?" + +"Let me come back with you to the country, sir! Let me watch over you +as faithfully as ever! Don't, don't separate me from dear Queen's +Crawley!" + +"The feller has left you, has he?" the Baronet said, beginning, as he +fancied, to comprehend. "Well, Becky--come back if you like. You can't +eat your cake and have it. Any ways I made you a vair offer. Coom +back as governess--you shall have it all your own way." She held out +one hand. She cried fit to break her heart; her ringlets fell over her +face, and over the marble mantelpiece where she laid it. + +"So the rascal ran off, eh?" Sir Pitt said, with a hideous attempt at +consolation. "Never mind, Becky, I'LL take care of 'ee." + +"Oh, sir! it would be the pride of my life to go back to Queen's +Crawley, and take care of the children, and of you as formerly, when +you said you were pleased with the services of your little Rebecca. +When I think of what you have just offered me, my heart fills with +gratitude indeed it does. I can't be your wife, sir; let me--let me be +your daughter." Saying which, Rebecca went down on HER knees in a most +tragical way, and, taking Sir Pitt's horny black hand between her own +two (which were very pretty and white, and as soft as satin), looked up +in his face with an expression of exquisite pathos and confidence, +when--when the door opened, and Miss Crawley sailed in. + +Mrs. Firkin and Miss Briggs, who happened by chance to be at the +parlour door soon after the Baronet and Rebecca entered the apartment, +had also seen accidentally, through the keyhole, the old gentleman +prostrate before the governess, and had heard the generous proposal +which he made her. It was scarcely out of his mouth when Mrs. Firkin +and Miss Briggs had streamed up the stairs, had rushed into the +drawing-room where Miss Crawley was reading the French novel, and had +given that old lady the astounding intelligence that Sir Pitt was on +his knees, proposing to Miss Sharp. And if you calculate the time for +the above dialogue to take place--the time for Briggs and Firkin to fly +to the drawing-room--the time for Miss Crawley to be astonished, and to +drop her volume of Pigault le Brun--and the time for her to come +downstairs--you will see how exactly accurate this history is, and how +Miss Crawley must have appeared at the very instant when Rebecca had +assumed the attitude of humility. + +"It is the lady on the ground, and not the gentleman," Miss Crawley +said, with a look and voice of great scorn. "They told me that YOU were +on your knees, Sir Pitt: do kneel once more, and let me see this pretty +couple!" + +"I have thanked Sir Pitt Crawley, Ma'am," Rebecca said, rising, "and +have told him that--that I never can become Lady Crawley." + +"Refused him!" Miss Crawley said, more bewildered than ever. Briggs +and Firkin at the door opened the eyes of astonishment and the lips of +wonder. + +"Yes--refused," Rebecca continued, with a sad, tearful voice. + +"And am I to credit my ears that you absolutely proposed to her, Sir +Pitt?" the old lady asked. + +"Ees," said the Baronet, "I did." + +"And she refused you as she says?" + +"Ees," Sir Pitt said, his features on a broad grin. + +"It does not seem to break your heart at any rate," Miss Crawley +remarked. + +"Nawt a bit," answered Sir Pitt, with a coolness and good-humour which +set Miss Crawley almost mad with bewilderment. That an old gentleman +of station should fall on his knees to a penniless governess, and burst +out laughing because she refused to marry him--that a penniless +governess should refuse a Baronet with four thousand a year--these were +mysteries which Miss Crawley could never comprehend. It surpassed any +complications of intrigue in her favourite Pigault le Brun. + +"I'm glad you think it good sport, brother," she continued, groping +wildly through this amazement. + +"Vamous," said Sir Pitt. "Who'd ha' thought it! what a sly little +devil! what a little fox it waws!" he muttered to himself, chuckling +with pleasure. + +"Who'd have thought what?" cries Miss Crawley, stamping with her foot. +"Pray, Miss Sharp, are you waiting for the Prince Regent's divorce, +that you don't think our family good enough for you?" + +"My attitude," Rebecca said, "when you came in, ma'am, did not look as +if I despised such an honour as this good--this noble man has deigned +to offer me. Do you think I have no heart? Have you all loved me, and +been so kind to the poor orphan--deserted--girl, and am I to feel +nothing? O my friends! O my benefactors! may not my love, my life, my +duty, try to repay the confidence you have shown me? Do you grudge me +even gratitude, Miss Crawley? It is too much--my heart is too full"; +and she sank down in a chair so pathetically, that most of the audience +present were perfectly melted with her sadness. + +"Whether you marry me or not, you're a good little girl, Becky, and I'm +your vriend, mind," said Sir Pitt, and putting on his crape-bound hat, +he walked away--greatly to Rebecca's relief; for it was evident that +her secret was unrevealed to Miss Crawley, and she had the advantage of +a brief reprieve. + +Putting her handkerchief to her eyes, and nodding away honest Briggs, +who would have followed her upstairs, she went up to her apartment; +while Briggs and Miss Crawley, in a high state of excitement, remained +to discuss the strange event, and Firkin, not less moved, dived down +into the kitchen regions, and talked of it with all the male and female +company there. And so impressed was Mrs. Firkin with the news, that +she thought proper to write off by that very night's post, "with her +humble duty to Mrs. Bute Crawley and the family at the Rectory, and Sir +Pitt has been and proposed for to marry Miss Sharp, wherein she has +refused him, to the wonder of all." + +The two ladies in the dining-room (where worthy Miss Briggs was +delighted to be admitted once more to confidential conversation with +her patroness) wondered to their hearts' content at Sir Pitt's offer, +and Rebecca's refusal; Briggs very acutely suggesting that there must +have been some obstacle in the shape of a previous attachment, +otherwise no young woman in her senses would ever have refused so +advantageous a proposal. + +"You would have accepted it yourself, wouldn't you, Briggs?" Miss +Crawley said, kindly. + +"Would it not be a privilege to be Miss Crawley's sister?" Briggs +replied, with meek evasion. + +"Well, Becky would have made a good Lady Crawley, after all," Miss +Crawley remarked (who was mollified by the girl's refusal, and very +liberal and generous now there was no call for her sacrifices). "She +has brains in plenty (much more wit in her little finger than you have, +my poor dear Briggs, in all your head). Her manners are excellent, now +I have formed her. She is a Montmorency, Briggs, and blood is +something, though I despise it for my part; and she would have held her +own amongst those pompous stupid Hampshire people much better than that +unfortunate ironmonger's daughter." + +Briggs coincided as usual, and the "previous attachment" was then +discussed in conjectures. "You poor friendless creatures are always +having some foolish tendre," Miss Crawley said. "You yourself, you +know, were in love with a writing-master (don't cry, Briggs--you're +always crying, and it won't bring him to life again), and I suppose +this unfortunate Becky has been silly and sentimental too--some +apothecary, or house-steward, or painter, or young curate, or something +of that sort." + +"Poor thing! poor thing!" says Briggs (who was thinking of twenty-four +years back, and that hectic young writing-master whose lock of yellow +hair, and whose letters, beautiful in their illegibility, she cherished +in her old desk upstairs). "Poor thing, poor thing!" says Briggs. +Once more she was a fresh-cheeked lass of eighteen; she was at evening +church, and the hectic writing-master and she were quavering out of the +same psalm-book. + +"After such conduct on Rebecca's part," Miss Crawley said +enthusiastically, "our family should do something. Find out who is the +objet, Briggs. I'll set him up in a shop; or order my portrait of him, +you know; or speak to my cousin, the Bishop and I'll doter Becky, and +we'll have a wedding, Briggs, and you shall make the breakfast, and be +a bridesmaid." + +Briggs declared that it would be delightful, and vowed that her dear +Miss Crawley was always kind and generous, and went up to Rebecca's +bedroom to console her and prattle about the offer, and the refusal, +and the cause thereof; and to hint at the generous intentions of Miss +Crawley, and to find out who was the gentleman that had the mastery of +Miss Sharp's heart. + +Rebecca was very kind, very affectionate and affected--responded to +Briggs's offer of tenderness with grateful fervour--owned there was a +secret attachment--a delicious mystery--what a pity Miss Briggs had not +remained half a minute longer at the keyhole! Rebecca might, perhaps, +have told more: but five minutes after Miss Briggs's arrival in +Rebecca's apartment, Miss Crawley actually made her appearance +there--an unheard-of honour--her impatience had overcome her; she could +not wait for the tardy operations of her ambassadress: so she came in +person, and ordered Briggs out of the room. And expressing her approval +of Rebecca's conduct, she asked particulars of the interview, and the +previous transactions which had brought about the astonishing offer of +Sir Pitt. + +Rebecca said she had long had some notion of the partiality with which +Sir Pitt honoured her (for he was in the habit of making his feelings +known in a very frank and unreserved manner) but, not to mention +private reasons with which she would not for the present trouble Miss +Crawley, Sir Pitt's age, station, and habits were such as to render a +marriage quite impossible; and could a woman with any feeling of +self-respect and any decency listen to proposals at such a moment, when +the funeral of the lover's deceased wife had not actually taken place? + +"Nonsense, my dear, you would never have refused him had there not been +some one else in the case," Miss Crawley said, coming to her point at +once. "Tell me the private reasons; what are the private reasons? +There is some one; who is it that has touched your heart?" + +Rebecca cast down her eyes, and owned there was. "You have guessed +right, dear lady," she said, with a sweet simple faltering voice. "You +wonder at one so poor and friendless having an attachment, don't you? I +have never heard that poverty was any safeguard against it. I wish it +were." + +"My poor dear child," cried Miss Crawley, who was always quite ready to +be sentimental, "is our passion unrequited, then? Are we pining in +secret? Tell me all, and let me console you." + +"I wish you could, dear Madam," Rebecca said in the same tearful tone. +"Indeed, indeed, I need it." And she laid her head upon Miss Crawley's +shoulder and wept there so naturally that the old lady, surprised into +sympathy, embraced her with an almost maternal kindness, uttered many +soothing protests of regard and affection for her, vowed that she loved +her as a daughter, and would do everything in her power to serve her. +"And now who is it, my dear? Is it that pretty Miss Sedley's brother? +You said something about an affair with him. I'll ask him here, my +dear. And you shall have him: indeed you shall." + +"Don't ask me now," Rebecca said. "You shall know all soon. Indeed +you shall. Dear kind Miss Crawley--dear friend, may I say so?" + +"That you may, my child," the old lady replied, kissing her. + +"I can't tell you now," sobbed out Rebecca, "I am very miserable. But +O! love me always--promise you will love me always." And in the midst +of mutual tears--for the emotions of the younger woman had awakened the +sympathies of the elder--this promise was solemnly given by Miss +Crawley, who left her little protege, blessing and admiring her as a +dear, artless, tender-hearted, affectionate, incomprehensible creature. + +And now she was left alone to think over the sudden and wonderful +events of the day, and of what had been and what might have been. What +think you were the private feelings of Miss, no (begging her pardon) of +Mrs. Rebecca? If, a few pages back, the present writer claimed the +privilege of peeping into Miss Amelia Sedley's bedroom, and +understanding with the omniscience of the novelist all the gentle pains +and passions which were tossing upon that innocent pillow, why should +he not declare himself to be Rebecca's confidante too, master of her +secrets, and seal-keeper of that young woman's conscience? + +Well, then, in the first place, Rebecca gave way to some very sincere +and touching regrets that a piece of marvellous good fortune should +have been so near her, and she actually obliged to decline it. In this +natural emotion every properly regulated mind will certainly share. +What good mother is there that would not commiserate a penniless +spinster, who might have been my lady, and have shared four thousand a +year? What well-bred young person is there in all Vanity Fair, who +will not feel for a hard-working, ingenious, meritorious girl, who gets +such an honourable, advantageous, provoking offer, just at the very +moment when it is out of her power to accept it? I am sure our friend +Becky's disappointment deserves and will command every sympathy. + +I remember one night being in the Fair myself, at an evening party. I +observed old Miss Toady there also present, single out for her special +attentions and flattery little Mrs. Briefless, the barrister's wife, +who is of a good family certainly, but, as we all know, is as poor as +poor can be. + +What, I asked in my own mind, can cause this obsequiousness on the part +of Miss Toady; has Briefless got a county court, or has his wife had a +fortune left her? Miss Toady explained presently, with that simplicity +which distinguishes all her conduct. "You know," she said, "Mrs +Briefless is granddaughter of Sir John Redhand, who is so ill at +Cheltenham that he can't last six months. Mrs. Briefless's papa +succeeds; so you see she will be a baronet's daughter." And Toady asked +Briefless and his wife to dinner the very next week. + +If the mere chance of becoming a baronet's daughter can procure a lady +such homage in the world, surely, surely we may respect the agonies of +a young woman who has lost the opportunity of becoming a baronet's +wife. Who would have dreamed of Lady Crawley dying so soon? She was +one of those sickly women that might have lasted these ten +years--Rebecca thought to herself, in all the woes of repentance--and I +might have been my lady! I might have led that old man whither I +would. I might have thanked Mrs. Bute for her patronage, and Mr. Pitt +for his insufferable condescension. I would have had the town-house +newly furnished and decorated. I would have had the handsomest +carriage in London, and a box at the opera; and I would have been +presented next season. All this might have been; and now--now all was +doubt and mystery. + +But Rebecca was a young lady of too much resolution and energy of +character to permit herself much useless and unseemly sorrow for the +irrevocable past; so, having devoted only the proper portion of regret +to it, she wisely turned her whole attention towards the future, which +was now vastly more important to her. And she surveyed her position, +and its hopes, doubts, and chances. + +In the first place, she was MARRIED--that was a great fact. Sir Pitt +knew it. She was not so much surprised into the avowal, as induced to +make it by a sudden calculation. It must have come some day: and why +not now as at a later period? He who would have married her himself +must at least be silent with regard to her marriage. How Miss Crawley +would bear the news--was the great question. Misgivings Rebecca had; +but she remembered all Miss Crawley had said; the old lady's avowed +contempt for birth; her daring liberal opinions; her general romantic +propensities; her almost doting attachment to her nephew, and her +repeatedly expressed fondness for Rebecca herself. She is so fond of +him, Rebecca thought, that she will forgive him anything: she is so +used to me that I don't think she could be comfortable without me: when +the eclaircissement comes there will be a scene, and hysterics, and a +great quarrel, and then a great reconciliation. At all events, what +use was there in delaying? the die was thrown, and now or to-morrow the +issue must be the same. And so, resolved that Miss Crawley should have +the news, the young person debated in her mind as to the best means of +conveying it to her; and whether she should face the storm that must +come, or fly and avoid it until its first fury was blown over. In this +state of meditation she wrote the following letter: + +Dearest Friend, + +The great crisis which we have debated about so often is COME. Half of +my secret is known, and I have thought and thought, until I am quite +sure that now is the time to reveal THE WHOLE OF THE MYSTERY. Sir Pitt +came to me this morning, and made--what do you think?--A DECLARATION IN +FORM. Think of that! Poor little me. I might have been Lady Crawley. +How pleased Mrs. Bute would have been: and ma tante if I had taken +precedence of her! I might have been somebody's mamma, instead of--O, I +tremble, I tremble, when I think how soon we must tell all! + +Sir Pitt knows I am married, and not knowing to whom, is not very much +displeased as yet. Ma tante is ACTUALLY ANGRY that I should have +refused him. But she is all kindness and graciousness. She +condescends to say I would have made him a good wife; and vows that she +will be a mother to your little Rebecca. She will be shaken when she +first hears the news. But need we fear anything beyond a momentary +anger? I think not: I AM SURE not. She dotes upon you so (you +naughty, good-for-nothing man), that she would pardon you ANYTHING: +and, indeed, I believe, the next place in her heart is mine: and that +she would be miserable without me. Dearest! something TELLS ME we shall +conquer. You shall leave that odious regiment: quit gaming, racing, +and BE A GOOD BOY; and we shall all live in Park Lane, and ma tante +shall leave us all her money. + +I shall try and walk to-morrow at 3 in the usual place. If Miss B. +accompanies me, you must come to dinner, and bring an answer, and put +it in the third volume of Porteus's Sermons. But, at all events, come +to your own + +R. + +To Miss Eliza Styles, At Mr. Barnet's, Saddler, Knightsbridge. + +And I trust there is no reader of this little story who has not +discernment enough to perceive that the Miss Eliza Styles (an old +schoolfellow, Rebecca said, with whom she had resumed an active +correspondence of late, and who used to fetch these letters from the +saddler's), wore brass spurs, and large curling mustachios, and was +indeed no other than Captain Rawdon Crawley. + + + +CHAPTER XVI + +The Letter on the Pincushion + +How they were married is not of the slightest consequence to anybody. +What is to hinder a Captain who is a major, and a young lady who is of +age, from purchasing a licence, and uniting themselves at any church in +this town? Who needs to be told, that if a woman has a will she will +assuredly find a way?--My belief is that one day, when Miss Sharp had +gone to pass the forenoon with her dear friend Miss Amelia Sedley in +Russell Square, a lady very like her might have been seen entering a +church in the City, in company with a gentleman with dyed mustachios, +who, after a quarter of an hour's interval, escorted her back to the +hackney-coach in waiting, and that this was a quiet bridal party. + +And who on earth, after the daily experience we have, can question the +probability of a gentleman marrying anybody? How many of the wise and +learned have married their cooks? Did not Lord Eldon himself, the most +prudent of men, make a runaway match? Were not Achilles and Ajax both +in love with their servant maids? And are we to expect a heavy dragoon +with strong desires and small brains, who had never controlled a +passion in his life, to become prudent all of a sudden, and to refuse +to pay any price for an indulgence to which he had a mind? If people +only made prudent marriages, what a stop to population there would be! + +It seems to me, for my part, that Mr. Rawdon's marriage was one of the +honestest actions which we shall have to record in any portion of that +gentleman's biography which has to do with the present history. No one +will say it is unmanly to be captivated by a woman, or, being +captivated, to marry her; and the admiration, the delight, the passion, +the wonder, the unbounded confidence, and frantic adoration with which, +by degrees, this big warrior got to regard the little Rebecca, were +feelings which the ladies at least will pronounce were not altogether +discreditable to him. When she sang, every note thrilled in his dull +soul, and tingled through his huge frame. When she spoke, he brought +all the force of his brains to listen and wonder. If she was jocular, +he used to revolve her jokes in his mind, and explode over them half an +hour afterwards in the street, to the surprise of the groom in the +tilbury by his side, or the comrade riding with him in Rotten Row. Her +words were oracles to him, her smallest actions marked by an infallible +grace and wisdom. "How she sings,--how she paints," thought he. "How +she rode that kicking mare at Queen's Crawley!" And he would say to +her in confidential moments, "By Jove, Beck, you're fit to be +Commander-in-Chief, or Archbishop of Canterbury, by Jove." Is his +case a rare one? and don't we see every day in the world many an honest +Hercules at the apron-strings of Omphale, and great whiskered Samsons +prostrate in Delilah's lap? + +When, then, Becky told him that the great crisis was near, and the time +for action had arrived, Rawdon expressed himself as ready to act under +her orders, as he would be to charge with his troop at the command of +his colonel. There was no need for him to put his letter into the +third volume of Porteus. Rebecca easily found a means to get rid of +Briggs, her companion, and met her faithful friend in "the usual place" +on the next day. She had thought over matters at night, and +communicated to Rawdon the result of her determinations. He agreed, of +course, to everything; was quite sure that it was all right: that what +she proposed was best; that Miss Crawley would infallibly relent, or +"come round," as he said, after a time. Had Rebecca's resolutions been +entirely different, he would have followed them as implicitly. "You +have head enough for both of us, Beck," said he. "You're sure to get +us out of the scrape. I never saw your equal, and I've met with some +clippers in my time too." And with this simple confession of faith, the +love-stricken dragoon left her to execute his part of the project which +she had formed for the pair. + +It consisted simply in the hiring of quiet lodgings at Brompton, or in +the neighbourhood of the barracks, for Captain and Mrs. Crawley. For +Rebecca had determined, and very prudently, we think, to fly. Rawdon +was only too happy at her resolve; he had been entreating her to take +this measure any time for weeks past. He pranced off to engage the +lodgings with all the impetuosity of love. He agreed to pay two +guineas a week so readily, that the landlady regretted she had asked +him so little. He ordered in a piano, and half a nursery-house full of +flowers: and a heap of good things. As for shawls, kid gloves, silk +stockings, gold French watches, bracelets and perfumery, he sent them +in with the profusion of blind love and unbounded credit. And having +relieved his mind by this outpouring of generosity, he went and dined +nervously at the club, waiting until the great moment of his life +should come. + +The occurrences of the previous day; the admirable conduct of +Rebecca in refusing an offer so advantageous to her, the secret +unhappiness preying upon her, the sweetness and silence with which she +bore her affliction, made Miss Crawley much more tender than usual. An +event of this nature, a marriage, or a refusal, or a proposal, thrills +through a whole household of women, and sets all their hysterical +sympathies at work. As an observer of human nature, I regularly +frequent St. George's, Hanover Square, during the genteel marriage +season; and though I have never seen the bridegroom's male friends give +way to tears, or the beadles and officiating clergy any way affected, +yet it is not at all uncommon to see women who are not in the least +concerned in the operations going on--old ladies who are long past +marrying, stout middle-aged females with plenty of sons and daughters, +let alone pretty young creatures in pink bonnets, who are on their +promotion, and may naturally take an interest in the ceremony--I say it +is quite common to see the women present piping, sobbing, sniffling; +hiding their little faces in their little useless pocket-handkerchiefs; +and heaving, old and young, with emotion. When my friend, the +fashionable John Pimlico, married the lovely Lady Belgravia Green +Parker, the excitement was so general that even the little snuffy old +pew-opener who let me into the seat was in tears. And wherefore? I +inquired of my own soul: she was not going to be married. + +Miss Crawley and Briggs in a word, after the affair of Sir Pitt, +indulged in the utmost luxury of sentiment, and Rebecca became an +object of the most tender interest to them. In her absence Miss +Crawley solaced herself with the most sentimental of the novels in her +library. Little Sharp, with her secret griefs, was the heroine of the +day. + +That night Rebecca sang more sweetly and talked more pleasantly than +she had ever been heard to do in Park Lane. She twined herself round +the heart of Miss Crawley. She spoke lightly and laughingly of Sir +Pitt's proposal, ridiculed it as the foolish fancy of an old man; and +her eyes filled with tears, and Briggs's heart with unutterable pangs +of defeat, as she said she desired no other lot than to remain for ever +with her dear benefactress. "My dear little creature," the old lady +said, "I don't intend to let you stir for years, that you may depend +upon it. As for going back to that odious brother of mine after what +has passed, it is out of the question. Here you stay with me and +Briggs. Briggs wants to go to see her relations very often. Briggs, +you may go when you like. But as for you, my dear, you must stay and +take care of the old woman." + +If Rawdon Crawley had been then and there present, instead of being at +the club nervously drinking claret, the pair might have gone down on +their knees before the old spinster, avowed all, and been forgiven in a +twinkling. But that good chance was denied to the young couple, +doubtless in order that this story might be written, in which numbers +of their wonderful adventures are narrated--adventures which could +never have occurred to them if they had been housed and sheltered under +the comfortable uninteresting forgiveness of Miss Crawley. + +Under Mrs. Firkin's orders, in the Park Lane establishment, was a young +woman from Hampshire, whose business it was, among other duties, to +knock at Miss Sharp's door with that jug of hot water which Firkin +would rather have perished than have presented to the intruder. This +girl, bred on the family estate, had a brother in Captain Crawley's +troop, and if the truth were known, I daresay it would come out that +she was aware of certain arrangements, which have a great deal to do +with this history. At any rate she purchased a yellow shawl, a pair of +green boots, and a light blue hat with a red feather with three guineas +which Rebecca gave her, and as little Sharp was by no means too liberal +with her money, no doubt it was for services rendered that Betty Martin +was so bribed. + +On the second day after Sir Pitt Crawley's offer to Miss Sharp, the sun +rose as usual, and at the usual hour Betty Martin, the upstairs maid, +knocked at the door of the governess's bedchamber. + +No answer was returned, and she knocked again. Silence was still +uninterrupted; and Betty, with the hot water, opened the door and +entered the chamber. + +The little white dimity bed was as smooth and trim as on the day +previous, when Betty's own hands had helped to make it. Two little +trunks were corded in one end of the room; and on the table before the +window--on the pincushion--the great fat pincushion lined with pink +inside, and twilled like a lady's nightcap--lay a letter. It had been +reposing there probably all night. + +Betty advanced towards it on tiptoe, as if she were afraid to awake +it--looked at it, and round the room, with an air of great wonder and +satisfaction; took up the letter, and grinned intensely as she turned +it round and over, and finally carried it into Miss Briggs's room below. + +How could Betty tell that the letter was for Miss Briggs, I should like +to know? All the schooling Betty had had was at Mrs. Bute Crawley's +Sunday school, and she could no more read writing than Hebrew. + +"La, Miss Briggs," the girl exclaimed, "O, Miss, something must have +happened--there's nobody in Miss Sharp's room; the bed ain't been slep +in, and she've run away, and left this letter for you, Miss." + +"WHAT!" cries Briggs, dropping her comb, the thin wisp of faded hair +falling over her shoulders; "an elopement! Miss Sharp a fugitive! What, +what is this?" and she eagerly broke the neat seal, and, as they say, +"devoured the contents" of the letter addressed to her. + +Dear Miss Briggs [the refugee wrote], the kindest heart in the world, +as yours is, will pity and sympathise with me and excuse me. With +tears, and prayers, and blessings, I leave the home where the poor +orphan has ever met with kindness and affection. Claims even superior +to those of my benefactress call me hence. I go to my duty--to my +HUSBAND. Yes, I am married. My husband COMMANDS me to seek the HUMBLE +HOME which we call ours. Dearest Miss Briggs, break the news as your +delicate sympathy will know how to do it--to my dear, my beloved friend +and benefactress. Tell her, ere I went, I shed tears on her dear +pillow--that pillow that I have so often soothed in sickness--that I +long AGAIN to watch--Oh, with what joy shall I return to dear Park +Lane! How I tremble for the answer which is to SEAL MY FATE! When Sir +Pitt deigned to offer me his hand, an honour of which my beloved Miss +Crawley said I was DESERVING (my blessings go with her for judging the +poor orphan worthy to be HER SISTER!) I told Sir Pitt that I was +already A WIFE. Even he forgave me. But my courage failed me, when I +should have told him all--that I could not be his wife, for I WAS HIS +DAUGHTER! I am wedded to the best and most generous of men--Miss +Crawley's Rawdon is MY Rawdon. At his COMMAND I open my lips, and +follow him to our humble home, as I would THROUGH THE WORLD. O, my +excellent and kind friend, intercede with my Rawdon's beloved aunt for +him and the poor girl to whom all HIS NOBLE RACE have shown such +UNPARALLELED AFFECTION. Ask Miss Crawley to receive HER CHILDREN. I +can say no more, but blessings, blessings on all in the dear house I +leave, prays + +Your affectionate and GRATEFUL Rebecca Crawley. Midnight. + +Just as Briggs had finished reading this affecting and interesting +document, which reinstated her in her position as first confidante of +Miss Crawley, Mrs. Firkin entered the room. "Here's Mrs. Bute Crawley +just arrived by the mail from Hampshire, and wants some tea; will you +come down and make breakfast, Miss?" + +And to the surprise of Firkin, clasping her dressing-gown around her, +the wisp of hair floating dishevelled behind her, the little +curl-papers still sticking in bunches round her forehead, Briggs sailed +down to Mrs. Bute with the letter in her hand containing the wonderful +news. + +"Oh, Mrs. Firkin," gasped Betty, "sech a business. Miss Sharp have a +gone and run away with the Capting, and they're off to Gretney Green!" +We would devote a chapter to describe the emotions of Mrs. Firkin, did +not the passions of her mistresses occupy our genteeler muse. + +When Mrs. Bute Crawley, numbed with midnight travelling, and warming +herself at the newly crackling parlour fire, heard from Miss Briggs the +intelligence of the clandestine marriage, she declared it was quite +providential that she should have arrived at such a time to assist poor +dear Miss Crawley in supporting the shock--that Rebecca was an artful +little hussy of whom she had always had her suspicions; and that as for +Rawdon Crawley, she never could account for his aunt's infatuation +regarding him, and had long considered him a profligate, lost, and +abandoned being. And this awful conduct, Mrs. Bute said, will have at +least this good effect, it will open poor dear Miss Crawley's eyes to +the real character of this wicked man. Then Mrs. Bute had a +comfortable hot toast and tea; and as there was a vacant room in the +house now, there was no need for her to remain at the Gloster Coffee +House where the Portsmouth mail had set her down, and whence she +ordered Mr. Bowls's aide-de-camp the footman to bring away her trunks. + +Miss Crawley, be it known, did not leave her room until near noon--taking +chocolate in bed in the morning, while Becky Sharp read the +Morning Post to her, or otherwise amusing herself or dawdling. The +conspirators below agreed that they would spare the dear lady's +feelings until she appeared in her drawing-room: meanwhile it was +announced to her that Mrs. Bute Crawley had come up from Hampshire by +the mail, was staying at the Gloster, sent her love to Miss Crawley, +and asked for breakfast with Miss Briggs. The arrival of Mrs. Bute, +which would not have caused any extreme delight at another period, was +hailed with pleasure now; Miss Crawley being pleased at the notion of a +gossip with her sister-in-law regarding the late Lady Crawley, the +funeral arrangements pending, and Sir Pitt's abrupt proposal to Rebecca. + +It was not until the old lady was fairly ensconced in her usual +arm-chair in the drawing-room, and the preliminary embraces and inquiries +had taken place between the ladies, that the conspirators thought it +advisable to submit her to the operation. Who has not admired the +artifices and delicate approaches with which women "prepare" their +friends for bad news? Miss Crawley's two friends made such an +apparatus of mystery before they broke the intelligence to her, that +they worked her up to the necessary degree of doubt and alarm. + +"And she refused Sir Pitt, my dear, dear Miss Crawley, prepare yourself +for it," Mrs. Bute said, "because--because she couldn't help herself." + +"Of course there was a reason," Miss Crawley answered. "She liked +somebody else. I told Briggs so yesterday." + +"LIKES somebody else!" Briggs gasped. "O my dear friend, she is +married already." + +"Married already," Mrs. Bute chimed in; and both sate with clasped +hands looking from each other at their victim. + +"Send her to me, the instant she comes in. The little sly wretch: how +dared she not tell me?" cried out Miss Crawley. + +"She won't come in soon. Prepare yourself, dear friend--she's gone out +for a long time--she's--she's gone altogether." + +"Gracious goodness, and who's to make my chocolate? Send for her and +have her back; I desire that she come back," the old lady said. + +"She decamped last night, Ma'am," cried Mrs. Bute. + +"She left a letter for me," Briggs exclaimed. "She's married to--" + +"Prepare her, for heaven's sake. Don't torture her, my dear Miss +Briggs." + +"She's married to whom?" cries the spinster in a nervous fury. + +"To--to a relation of--" + +"She refused Sir Pitt," cried the victim. "Speak at once. Don't drive +me mad." + +"O Ma'am--prepare her, Miss Briggs--she's married to Rawdon Crawley." + +"Rawdon married Rebecca--governess--nobod-- Get out of my house, you +fool, you idiot--you stupid old Briggs--how dare you? You're in the +plot--you made him marry, thinking that I'd leave my money from him--you +did, Martha," the poor old lady screamed in hysteric sentences. + +"I, Ma'am, ask a member of this family to marry a drawing-master's +daughter?" + +"Her mother was a Montmorency," cried out the old lady, pulling at the +bell with all her might. + +"Her mother was an opera girl, and she has been on the stage or worse +herself," said Mrs. Bute. + +Miss Crawley gave a final scream, and fell back in a faint. They were +forced to take her back to the room which she had just quitted. One fit +of hysterics succeeded another. The doctor was sent for--the +apothecary arrived. Mrs. Bute took up the post of nurse by her bedside. +"Her relations ought to be round about her," that amiable woman said. + +She had scarcely been carried up to her room, when a new person arrived +to whom it was also necessary to break the news. This was Sir Pitt. +"Where's Becky?" he said, coming in. "Where's her traps? She's coming +with me to Queen's Crawley." + +"Have you not heard the astonishing intelligence regarding her +surreptitious union?" Briggs asked. + +"What's that to me?" Sir Pitt asked. "I know she's married. That +makes no odds. Tell her to come down at once, and not keep me." + +"Are you not aware, sir," Miss Briggs asked, "that she has left our +roof, to the dismay of Miss Crawley, who is nearly killed by the +intelligence of Captain Rawdon's union with her?" + +When Sir Pitt Crawley heard that Rebecca was married to his son, he +broke out into a fury of language, which it would do no good to repeat +in this place, as indeed it sent poor Briggs shuddering out of the +room; and with her we will shut the door upon the figure of the +frenzied old man, wild with hatred and insane with baffled desire. + +One day after he went to Queen's Crawley, he burst like a madman into +the room she had used when there--dashed open her boxes with his foot, +and flung about her papers, clothes, and other relics. Miss Horrocks, +the butler's daughter, took some of them. The children dressed +themselves and acted plays in the others. It was but a few days after +the poor mother had gone to her lonely burying-place; and was laid, +unwept and disregarded, in a vault full of strangers. + +"Suppose the old lady doesn't come to," Rawdon said to his little wife, +as they sate together in the snug little Brompton lodgings. She had +been trying the new piano all the morning. The new gloves fitted her +to a nicety; the new shawls became her wonderfully; the new rings +glittered on her little hands, and the new watch ticked at her waist; +"suppose she don't come round, eh, Becky?" + +"I'LL make your fortune," she said; and Delilah patted Samson's cheek. + +"You can do anything," he said, kissing the little hand. "By Jove you +can; and we'll drive down to the Star and Garter, and dine, by Jove." + + + +CHAPTER XVII + +How Captain Dobbin Bought a Piano + +If there is any exhibition in all Vanity Fair which Satire and +Sentiment can visit arm in arm together; where you light on the +strangest contrasts laughable and tearful: where you may be gentle and +pathetic, or savage and cynical with perfect propriety: it is at one of +those public assemblies, a crowd of which are advertised every day in +the last page of the Times newspaper, and over which the late Mr. +George Robins used to preside with so much dignity. There are very few +London people, as I fancy, who have not attended at these meetings, and +all with a taste for moralizing must have thought, with a sensation and +interest not a little startling and queer, of the day when their turn +shall come too, and Mr. Hammerdown will sell by the orders of Diogenes' +assignees, or will be instructed by the executors, to offer to public +competition, the library, furniture, plate, wardrobe, and choice cellar +of wines of Epicurus deceased. + +Even with the most selfish disposition, the Vanity Fairian, as he +witnesses this sordid part of the obsequies of a departed friend, can't +but feel some sympathies and regret. My Lord Dives's remains are in the +family vault: the statuaries are cutting an inscription veraciously +commemorating his virtues, and the sorrows of his heir, who is +disposing of his goods. What guest at Dives's table can pass the +familiar house without a sigh?--the familiar house of which the lights +used to shine so cheerfully at seven o'clock, of which the hall-doors +opened so readily, of which the obsequious servants, as you passed up +the comfortable stair, sounded your name from landing to landing, until +it reached the apartment where jolly old Dives welcomed his friends! +What a number of them he had; and what a noble way of entertaining +them. How witty people used to be here who were morose when they got +out of the door; and how courteous and friendly men who slandered and +hated each other everywhere else! He was pompous, but with such a cook +what would one not swallow? he was rather dull, perhaps, but would not +such wine make any conversation pleasant? We must get some of his +Burgundy at any price, the mourners cry at his club. "I got this box +at old Dives's sale," Pincher says, handing it round, "one of Louis +XV's mistresses--pretty thing, is it not?--sweet miniature," and they +talk of the way in which young Dives is dissipating his fortune. + +How changed the house is, though! The front is patched over with +bills, setting forth the particulars of the furniture in staring +capitals. They have hung a shred of carpet out of an upstairs +window--a half dozen of porters are lounging on the dirty steps--the +hall swarms with dingy guests of oriental countenance, who thrust +printed cards into your hand, and offer to bid. Old women and amateurs +have invaded the upper apartments, pinching the bed-curtains, poking +into the feathers, shampooing the mattresses, and clapping the wardrobe +drawers to and fro. Enterprising young housekeepers are measuring the +looking-glasses and hangings to see if they will suit the new menage +(Snob will brag for years that he has purchased this or that at Dives's +sale), and Mr. Hammerdown is sitting on the great mahogany +dining-tables, in the dining-room below, waving the ivory hammer, and +employing all the artifices of eloquence, enthusiasm, entreaty, reason, +despair; shouting to his people; satirizing Mr. Davids for his +sluggishness; inspiriting Mr. Moss into action; imploring, commanding, +bellowing, until down comes the hammer like fate, and we pass to the +next lot. O Dives, who would ever have thought, as we sat round the +broad table sparkling with plate and spotless linen, to have seen such +a dish at the head of it as that roaring auctioneer? + +It was rather late in the sale. The excellent drawing-room furniture +by the best makers; the rare and famous wines selected, regardless of +cost, and with the well-known taste of the purchaser; the rich and +complete set of family plate had been sold on the previous days. +Certain of the best wines (which all had a great character among +amateurs in the neighbourhood) had been purchased for his master, who +knew them very well, by the butler of our friend John Osborne, Esquire, +of Russell Square. A small portion of the most useful articles of the +plate had been bought by some young stockbrokers from the City. And +now the public being invited to the purchase of minor objects, it +happened that the orator on the table was expatiating on the merits of +a picture, which he sought to recommend to his audience: it was by no +means so select or numerous a company as had attended the previous days +of the auction. + +"No. 369," roared Mr. Hammerdown. "Portrait of a gentleman on an +elephant. Who'll bid for the gentleman on the elephant? Lift up the +picture, Blowman, and let the company examine this lot." A long, pale, +military-looking gentleman, seated demurely at the mahogany table, +could not help grinning as this valuable lot was shown by Mr. Blowman. +"Turn the elephant to the Captain, Blowman. What shall we say, sir, +for the elephant?" but the Captain, blushing in a very hurried and +discomfited manner, turned away his head. + +"Shall we say twenty guineas for this work of art?--fifteen, five, name +your own price. The gentleman without the elephant is worth five +pound." + +"I wonder it ain't come down with him," said a professional wag, "he's +anyhow a precious big one"; at which (for the elephant-rider was +represented as of a very stout figure) there was a general giggle in +the room. + +"Don't be trying to deprecate the value of the lot, Mr. Moss," Mr. +Hammerdown said; "let the company examine it as a work of art--the +attitude of the gallant animal quite according to natur'; the gentleman +in a nankeen jacket, his gun in his hand, is going to the chase; in the +distance a banyhann tree and a pagody, most likely resemblances of some +interesting spot in our famous Eastern possessions. How much for this +lot? Come, gentlemen, don't keep me here all day." + +Some one bid five shillings, at which the military gentleman looked +towards the quarter from which this splendid offer had come, and there +saw another officer with a young lady on his arm, who both appeared to +be highly amused with the scene, and to whom, finally, this lot was +knocked down for half a guinea. He at the table looked more surprised +and discomposed than ever when he spied this pair, and his head sank +into his military collar, and he turned his back upon them, so as to +avoid them altogether. + +Of all the other articles which Mr. Hammerdown had the honour to offer +for public competition that day it is not our purpose to make mention, +save of one only, a little square piano, which came down from the upper +regions of the house (the state grand piano having been disposed of +previously); this the young lady tried with a rapid and skilful hand +(making the officer blush and start again), and for it, when its turn +came, her agent began to bid. + +But there was an opposition here. The Hebrew aide-de-camp in the +service of the officer at the table bid against the Hebrew gentleman +employed by the elephant purchasers, and a brisk battle ensued over +this little piano, the combatants being greatly encouraged by Mr. +Hammerdown. + +At last, when the competition had been prolonged for some time, the +elephant captain and lady desisted from the race; and the hammer coming +down, the auctioneer said:--"Mr. Lewis, twenty-five," and Mr. Lewis's +chief thus became the proprietor of the little square piano. Having +effected the purchase, he sate up as if he was greatly relieved, and +the unsuccessful competitors catching a glimpse of him at this moment, +the lady said to her friend, + +"Why, Rawdon, it's Captain Dobbin." + +I suppose Becky was discontented with the new piano her husband had +hired for her, or perhaps the proprietors of that instrument had +fetched it away, declining farther credit, or perhaps she had a +particular attachment for the one which she had just tried to purchase, +recollecting it in old days, when she used to play upon it, in the +little sitting-room of our dear Amelia Sedley. + +The sale was at the old house in Russell Square, where we passed some +evenings together at the beginning of this story. Good old John Sedley +was a ruined man. His name had been proclaimed as a defaulter on the +Stock Exchange, and his bankruptcy and commercial extermination had +followed. Mr. Osborne's butler came to buy some of the famous port +wine to transfer to the cellars over the way. As for one dozen +well-manufactured silver spoons and forks at per oz., and one dozen +dessert ditto ditto, there were three young stockbrokers (Messrs. Dale, +Spiggot, and Dale, of Threadneedle Street, indeed), who, having had +dealings with the old man, and kindnesses from him in days when he was +kind to everybody with whom he dealt, sent this little spar out of the +wreck with their love to good Mrs. Sedley; and with respect to the +piano, as it had been Amelia's, and as she might miss it and want one +now, and as Captain William Dobbin could no more play upon it than he +could dance on the tight rope, it is probable that he did not purchase +the instrument for his own use. + +In a word, it arrived that evening at a wonderful small cottage in a +street leading from the Fulham Road--one of those streets which have +the finest romantic names--(this was called St. Adelaide Villas, +Anna-Maria Road West), where the houses look like baby-houses; where +the people, looking out of the first-floor windows, must infallibly, as +you think, sit with their feet in the parlours; where the shrubs in the +little gardens in front bloom with a perennial display of little +children's pinafores, little red socks, caps, &c. (polyandria +polygynia); whence you hear the sound of jingling spinets and women +singing; where little porter pots hang on the railings sunning +themselves; whither of evenings you see City clerks padding wearily: +here it was that Mr. Clapp, the clerk of Mr. Sedley, had his domicile, +and in this asylum the good old gentleman hid his head with his wife +and daughter when the crash came. + +Jos Sedley had acted as a man of his disposition would, when the +announcement of the family misfortune reached him. He did not come to +London, but he wrote to his mother to draw upon his agents for whatever +money was wanted, so that his kind broken-spirited old parents had no +present poverty to fear. This done, Jos went on at the boarding-house +at Cheltenham pretty much as before. He drove his curricle; he drank +his claret; he played his rubber; he told his Indian stories, and the +Irish widow consoled and flattered him as usual. His present of money, +needful as it was, made little impression on his parents; and I have +heard Amelia say that the first day on which she saw her father lift up +his head after the failure was on the receipt of the packet of forks +and spoons with the young stockbrokers' love, over which he burst out +crying like a child, being greatly more affected than even his wife, to +whom the present was addressed. Edward Dale, the junior of the house, +who purchased the spoons for the firm, was, in fact, very sweet upon +Amelia, and offered for her in spite of all. He married Miss Louisa +Cutts (daughter of Higham and Cutts, the eminent cornfactors) with a +handsome fortune in 1820; and is now living in splendour, and with a +numerous family, at his elegant villa, Muswell Hill. But we must not +let the recollections of this good fellow cause us to diverge from the +principal history. + +I hope the reader has much too good an opinion of Captain and Mrs. +Crawley to suppose that they ever would have dreamed of paying a visit +to so remote a district as Bloomsbury, if they thought the family whom +they proposed to honour with a visit were not merely out of fashion, +but out of money, and could be serviceable to them in no possible +manner. Rebecca was entirely surprised at the sight of the comfortable +old house where she had met with no small kindness, ransacked by +brokers and bargainers, and its quiet family treasures given up to +public desecration and plunder. A month after her flight, she had +bethought her of Amelia, and Rawdon, with a horse-laugh, had expressed +a perfect willingness to see young George Osborne again. "He's a very +agreeable acquaintance, Beck," the wag added. "I'd like to sell him +another horse, Beck. I'd like to play a few more games at billiards +with him. He'd be what I call useful just now, Mrs. C.--ha, ha!" by +which sort of speech it is not to be supposed that Rawdon Crawley had a +deliberate desire to cheat Mr. Osborne at play, but only wished to take +that fair advantage of him which almost every sporting gentleman in +Vanity Fair considers to be his due from his neighbour. + +The old aunt was long in "coming-to." A month had elapsed. Rawdon was +denied the door by Mr. Bowls; his servants could not get a lodgment in +the house at Park Lane; his letters were sent back unopened. Miss +Crawley never stirred out--she was unwell--and Mrs. Bute remained still +and never left her. Crawley and his wife both of them augured evil +from the continued presence of Mrs. Bute. + +"Gad, I begin to perceive now why she was always bringing us together +at Queen's Crawley," Rawdon said. + +"What an artful little woman!" ejaculated Rebecca. + +"Well, I don't regret it, if you don't," the Captain cried, still in an +amorous rapture with his wife, who rewarded him with a kiss by way of +reply, and was indeed not a little gratified by the generous confidence +of her husband. + +"If he had but a little more brains," she thought to herself, "I might +make something of him"; but she never let him perceive the opinion she +had of him; listened with indefatigable complacency to his stories of +the stable and the mess; laughed at all his jokes; felt the greatest +interest in Jack Spatterdash, whose cab-horse had come down, and Bob +Martingale, who had been taken up in a gambling-house, and Tom +Cinqbars, who was going to ride the steeplechase. When he came home she +was alert and happy: when he went out she pressed him to go: when he +stayed at home, she played and sang for him, made him good drinks, +superintended his dinner, warmed his slippers, and steeped his soul in +comfort. The best of women (I have heard my grandmother say) are +hypocrites. We don't know how much they hide from us: how watchful +they are when they seem most artless and confidential: how often those +frank smiles which they wear so easily, are traps to cajole or elude or +disarm--I don't mean in your mere coquettes, but your domestic models, +and paragons of female virtue. Who has not seen a woman hide the +dulness of a stupid husband, or coax the fury of a savage one? We +accept this amiable slavishness, and praise a woman for it: we call +this pretty treachery truth. A good housewife is of necessity a +humbug; and Cornelia's husband was hoodwinked, as Potiphar was--only in +a different way. + +By these attentions, that veteran rake, Rawdon Crawley, found himself +converted into a very happy and submissive married man. His former +haunts knew him not. They asked about him once or twice at his clubs, +but did not miss him much: in those booths of Vanity Fair people seldom +do miss each other. His secluded wife ever smiling and cheerful, his +little comfortable lodgings, snug meals, and homely evenings, had all +the charms of novelty and secrecy. The marriage was not yet declared +to the world, or published in the Morning Post. All his creditors +would have come rushing on him in a body, had they known that he was +united to a woman without fortune. "My relations won't cry fie upon +me," Becky said, with rather a bitter laugh; and she was quite +contented to wait until the old aunt should be reconciled, before she +claimed her place in society. So she lived at Brompton, and meanwhile +saw no one, or only those few of her husband's male companions who were +admitted into her little dining-room. These were all charmed with her. +The little dinners, the laughing and chatting, the music afterwards, +delighted all who participated in these enjoyments. Major Martingale +never thought about asking to see the marriage licence, Captain +Cinqbars was perfectly enchanted with her skill in making punch. And +young Lieutenant Spatterdash (who was fond of piquet, and whom Crawley +would often invite) was evidently and quickly smitten by Mrs. Crawley; +but her own circumspection and modesty never forsook her for a moment, +and Crawley's reputation as a fire-eating and jealous warrior was a +further and complete defence to his little wife. + +There are gentlemen of very good blood and fashion in this city, who +never have entered a lady's drawing-room; so that though Rawdon +Crawley's marriage might be talked about in his county, where, of +course, Mrs. Bute had spread the news, in London it was doubted, or not +heeded, or not talked about at all. He lived comfortably on credit. +He had a large capital of debts, which laid out judiciously, will carry +a man along for many years, and on which certain men about town +contrive to live a hundred times better than even men with ready money +can do. Indeed who is there that walks London streets, but can point +out a half-dozen of men riding by him splendidly, while he is on foot, +courted by fashion, bowed into their carriages by tradesmen, denying +themselves nothing, and living on who knows what? We see Jack +Thriftless prancing in the park, or darting in his brougham down Pall +Mall: we eat his dinners served on his miraculous plate. "How did this +begin," we say, "or where will it end?" "My dear fellow," I heard Jack +once say, "I owe money in every capital in Europe." The end must come +some day, but in the meantime Jack thrives as much as ever; people are +glad enough to shake him by the hand, ignore the little dark stories +that are whispered every now and then against him, and pronounce him a +good-natured, jovial, reckless fellow. + +Truth obliges us to confess that Rebecca had married a gentleman of +this order. Everything was plentiful in his house but ready money, of +which their menage pretty early felt the want; and reading the Gazette +one day, and coming upon the announcement of "Lieutenant G. Osborne to +be Captain by purchase, vice Smith, who exchanges," Rawdon uttered that +sentiment regarding Amelia's lover, which ended in the visit to Russell +Square. + +When Rawdon and his wife wished to communicate with Captain Dobbin at +the sale, and to know particulars of the catastrophe which had befallen +Rebecca's old acquaintances, the Captain had vanished; and such +information as they got was from a stray porter or broker at the +auction. + +"Look at them with their hooked beaks," Becky said, getting into the +buggy, her picture under her arm, in great glee. "They're like +vultures after a battle." + +"Don't know. Never was in action, my dear. Ask Martingale; he was in +Spain, aide-de-camp to General Blazes." + +"He was a very kind old man, Mr. Sedley," Rebecca said; "I'm really +sorry he's gone wrong." + +"O stockbrokers--bankrupts--used to it, you know," Rawdon replied, +cutting a fly off the horse's ear. + +"I wish we could have afforded some of the plate, Rawdon," the wife +continued sentimentally. "Five-and-twenty guineas was monstrously dear +for that little piano. We chose it at Broadwood's for Amelia, when she +came from school. It only cost five-and-thirty then." + +"What-d'-ye-call'em--'Osborne,' will cry off now, I suppose, since the +family is smashed. How cut up your pretty little friend will be; hey, +Becky?" + +"I daresay she'll recover it," Becky said with a smile--and they drove +on and talked about something else. + + + +CHAPTER XVIII + +Who Played on the Piano Captain Dobbin Bought + +Our surprised story now finds itself for a moment among very famous +events and personages, and hanging on to the skirts of history. When +the eagles of Napoleon Bonaparte, the Corsican upstart, were flying +from Provence, where they had perched after a brief sojourn in Elba, +and from steeple to steeple until they reached the towers of Notre +Dame, I wonder whether the Imperial birds had any eye for a little +corner of the parish of Bloomsbury, London, which you might have +thought so quiet, that even the whirring and flapping of those mighty +wings would pass unobserved there? + +"Napoleon has landed at Cannes." Such news might create a panic at +Vienna, and cause Russia to drop his cards, and take Prussia into a +corner, and Talleyrand and Metternich to wag their heads together, +while Prince Hardenberg, and even the present Marquis of Londonderry, +were puzzled; but how was this intelligence to affect a young lady in +Russell Square, before whose door the watchman sang the hours when she +was asleep: who, if she strolled in the square, was guarded there by +the railings and the beadle: who, if she walked ever so short a +distance to buy a ribbon in Southampton Row, was followed by Black +Sambo with an enormous cane: who was always cared for, dressed, put to +bed, and watched over by ever so many guardian angels, with and without +wages? Bon Dieu, I say, is it not hard that the fateful rush of the +great Imperial struggle can't take place without affecting a poor +little harmless girl of eighteen, who is occupied in billing and +cooing, or working muslin collars in Russell Square? You too, kindly, +homely flower!--is the great roaring war tempest coming to sweep you +down, here, although cowering under the shelter of Holborn? Yes; +Napoleon is flinging his last stake, and poor little Emmy Sedley's +happiness forms, somehow, part of it. + +In the first place, her father's fortune was swept down with that fatal +news. All his speculations had of late gone wrong with the luckless +old gentleman. Ventures had failed; merchants had broken; funds had +risen when he calculated they would fall. What need to particularize? +If success is rare and slow, everybody knows how quick and easy ruin +is. Old Sedley had kept his own sad counsel. Everything seemed to go +on as usual in the quiet, opulent house; the good-natured mistress +pursuing, quite unsuspiciously, her bustling idleness, and daily easy +avocations; the daughter absorbed still in one selfish, tender thought, +and quite regardless of all the world besides, when that final crash +came, under which the worthy family fell. + +One night Mrs. Sedley was writing cards for a party; the Osbornes had +given one, and she must not be behindhand; John Sedley, who had come +home very late from the City, sate silent at the chimney side, while +his wife was prattling to him; Emmy had gone up to her room ailing and +low-spirited. "She's not happy," the mother went on. "George Osborne +neglects her. I've no patience with the airs of those people. The +girls have not been in the house these three weeks; and George has been +twice in town without coming. Edward Dale saw him at the Opera. +Edward would marry her I'm sure: and there's Captain Dobbin who, I +think, would--only I hate all army men. Such a dandy as George has +become. With his military airs, indeed! We must show some folks that +we're as good as they. Only give Edward Dale any encouragement, and +you'll see. We must have a party, Mr. S. Why don't you speak, John? +Shall I say Tuesday fortnight? Why don't you answer? Good God, John, +what has happened?" + +John Sedley sprang up out of his chair to meet his wife, who ran to +him. He seized her in his arms, and said with a hasty voice, "We're +ruined, Mary. We've got the world to begin over again, dear. It's +best that you should know all, and at once." As he spoke, he trembled +in every limb, and almost fell. He thought the news would have +overpowered his wife--his wife, to whom he had never said a hard word. +But it was he that was the most moved, sudden as the shock was to her. +When he sank back into his seat, it was the wife that took the office +of consoler. She took his trembling hand, and kissed it, and put it +round her neck: she called him her John--her dear John--her old +man--her kind old man; she poured out a hundred words of incoherent +love and tenderness; her faithful voice and simple caresses wrought +this sad heart up to an inexpressible delight and anguish, and cheered +and solaced his over-burdened soul. + +Only once in the course of the long night as they sate together, and +poor Sedley opened his pent-up soul, and told the story of his losses +and embarrassments--the treason of some of his oldest friends, the +manly kindness of some, from whom he never could have expected it--in a +general confession--only once did the faithful wife give way to emotion. + +"My God, my God, it will break Emmy's heart," she said. + +The father had forgotten the poor girl. She was lying, awake and +unhappy, overhead. In the midst of friends, home, and kind parents, +she was alone. To how many people can any one tell all? Who will be +open where there is no sympathy, or has call to speak to those who +never can understand? Our gentle Amelia was thus solitary. She had no +confidante, so to speak, ever since she had anything to confide. She +could not tell the old mother her doubts and cares; the would-be +sisters seemed every day more strange to her. And she had misgivings +and fears which she dared not acknowledge to herself, though she was +always secretly brooding over them. + +Her heart tried to persist in asserting that George Osborne was worthy +and faithful to her, though she knew otherwise. How many a thing had +she said, and got no echo from him. How many suspicions of selfishness +and indifference had she to encounter and obstinately overcome. To +whom could the poor little martyr tell these daily struggles and +tortures? Her hero himself only half understood her. She did not dare +to own that the man she loved was her inferior; or to feel that she had +given her heart away too soon. Given once, the pure bashful maiden was +too modest, too tender, too trustful, too weak, too much woman to +recall it. We are Turks with the affections of our women; and have +made them subscribe to our doctrine too. We let their bodies go abroad +liberally enough, with smiles and ringlets and pink bonnets to disguise +them instead of veils and yakmaks. But their souls must be seen by +only one man, and they obey not unwillingly, and consent to remain at +home as our slaves--ministering to us and doing drudgery for us. + +So imprisoned and tortured was this gentle little heart, when in the +month of March, Anno Domini 1815, Napoleon landed at Cannes, and Louis +XVIII fled, and all Europe was in alarm, and the funds fell, and old +John Sedley was ruined. + +We are not going to follow the worthy old stockbroker through those +last pangs and agonies of ruin through which he passed before his +commercial demise befell. They declared him at the Stock Exchange; he +was absent from his house of business: his bills were protested: his +act of bankruptcy formal. The house and furniture of Russell Square +were seized and sold up, and he and his family were thrust away, as we +have seen, to hide their heads where they might. + +John Sedley had not the heart to review the domestic establishment who +have appeared now and anon in our pages and of whom he was now forced +by poverty to take leave. The wages of those worthy people were +discharged with that punctuality which men frequently show who only owe +in great sums--they were sorry to leave good places--but they did not +break their hearts at parting from their adored master and mistress. +Amelia's maid was profuse in condolences, but went off quite resigned +to better herself in a genteeler quarter of the town. Black Sambo, +with the infatuation of his profession, determined on setting up a +public-house. Honest old Mrs. Blenkinsop indeed, who had seen the +birth of Jos and Amelia, and the wooing of John Sedley and his wife, +was for staying by them without wages, having amassed a considerable +sum in their service: and she accompanied the fallen people into their +new and humble place of refuge, where she tended them and grumbled +against them for a while. + +Of all Sedley's opponents in his debates with his creditors which now +ensued, and harassed the feelings of the humiliated old gentleman so +severely, that in six weeks he oldened more than he had done for +fifteen years before--the most determined and obstinate seemed to be +John Osborne, his old friend and neighbour--John Osborne, whom he had +set up in life--who was under a hundred obligations to him--and whose +son was to marry Sedley's daughter. Any one of these circumstances +would account for the bitterness of Osborne's opposition. + +When one man has been under very remarkable obligations to another, +with whom he subsequently quarrels, a common sense of decency, as it +were, makes of the former a much severer enemy than a mere stranger +would be. To account for your own hard-heartedness and ingratitude in +such a case, you are bound to prove the other party's crime. It is not +that you are selfish, brutal, and angry at the failure of a +speculation--no, no--it is that your partner has led you into it by the +basest treachery and with the most sinister motives. From a mere sense +of consistency, a persecutor is bound to show that the fallen man is a +villain--otherwise he, the persecutor, is a wretch himself. + +And as a general rule, which may make all creditors who are inclined to +be severe pretty comfortable in their minds, no men embarrassed are +altogether honest, very likely. They conceal something; they +exaggerate chances of good luck; hide away the real state of affairs; +say that things are flourishing when they are hopeless, keep a smiling +face (a dreary smile it is) upon the verge of bankruptcy--are ready to +lay hold of any pretext for delay or of any money, so as to stave off +the inevitable ruin a few days longer. "Down with such dishonesty," +says the creditor in triumph, and reviles his sinking enemy. "You +fool, why do you catch at a straw?" calm good sense says to the man +that is drowning. "You villain, why do you shrink from plunging into +the irretrievable Gazette?" says prosperity to the poor devil battling +in that black gulf. Who has not remarked the readiness with which the +closest of friends and honestest of men suspect and accuse each other +of cheating when they fall out on money matters? Everybody does it. +Everybody is right, I suppose, and the world is a rogue. + +Then Osborne had the intolerable sense of former benefits to goad and +irritate him: these are always a cause of hostility aggravated. +Finally, he had to break off the match between Sedley's daughter and +his son; and as it had gone very far indeed, and as the poor girl's +happiness and perhaps character were compromised, it was necessary to +show the strongest reasons for the rupture, and for John Osborne to +prove John Sedley to be a very bad character indeed. + +At the meetings of creditors, then, he comported himself with a +savageness and scorn towards Sedley, which almost succeeded in breaking +the heart of that ruined bankrupt man. On George's intercourse with +Amelia he put an instant veto--menacing the youth with maledictions if +he broke his commands, and vilipending the poor innocent girl as the +basest and most artful of vixens. One of the great conditions of anger +and hatred is, that you must tell and believe lies against the hated +object, in order, as we said, to be consistent. + +When the great crash came--the announcement of ruin, and the departure +from Russell Square, and the declaration that all was over between her +and George--all over between her and love, her and happiness, her and +faith in the world--a brutal letter from John Osborne told her in a few +curt lines that her father's conduct had been of such a nature that all +engagements between the families were at an end--when the final award +came, it did not shock her so much as her parents, as her mother rather +expected (for John Sedley himself was entirely prostrate in the ruins +of his own affairs and shattered honour). Amelia took the news very +palely and calmly. It was only the confirmation of the dark presages +which had long gone before. It was the mere reading of the +sentence--of the crime she had long ago been guilty--the crime of +loving wrongly, too violently, against reason. She told no more of her +thoughts now than she had before. She seemed scarcely more unhappy now +when convinced all hope was over, than before when she felt but dared +not confess that it was gone. So she changed from the large house to +the small one without any mark or difference; remained in her little +room for the most part; pined silently; and died away day by day. I do +not mean to say that all females are so. My dear Miss Bullock, I do +not think your heart would break in this way. You are a strong-minded +young woman with proper principles. I do not venture to say that mine +would; it has suffered, and, it must be confessed, survived. But there +are some souls thus gently constituted, thus frail, and delicate, and +tender. + +Whenever old John Sedley thought of the affair between George and +Amelia, or alluded to it, it was with bitterness almost as great as Mr. +Osborne himself had shown. He cursed Osborne and his family as +heartless, wicked, and ungrateful. No power on earth, he swore, would +induce him to marry his daughter to the son of such a villain, and he +ordered Emmy to banish George from her mind, and to return all the +presents and letters which she had ever had from him. + +She promised acquiescence, and tried to obey. She put up the two or +three trinkets: and, as for the letters, she drew them out of the place +where she kept them; and read them over--as if she did not know them by +heart already: but she could not part with them. That effort was too +much for her; she placed them back in her bosom again--as you have seen +a woman nurse a child that is dead. Young Amelia felt that she would +die or lose her senses outright, if torn away from this last +consolation. How she used to blush and lighten up when those letters +came! How she used to trip away with a beating heart, so that she +might read unseen! If they were cold, yet how perversely this fond +little soul interpreted them into warmth. If they were short or +selfish, what excuses she found for the writer! + +It was over these few worthless papers that she brooded and brooded. +She lived in her past life--every letter seemed to recall some +circumstance of it. How well she remembered them all! His looks and +tones, his dress, what he said and how--these relics and remembrances +of dead affection were all that were left her in the world. And the +business of her life, was--to watch the corpse of Love. + +To death she looked with inexpressible longing. Then, she thought, I +shall always be able to follow him. I am not praising her conduct or +setting her up as a model for Miss Bullock to imitate. Miss B. knows +how to regulate her feelings better than this poor little creature. +Miss B. would never have committed herself as that imprudent Amelia had +done; pledged her love irretrievably; confessed her heart away, and got +back nothing--only a brittle promise which was snapt and worthless in a +moment. A long engagement is a partnership which one party is free to +keep or to break, but which involves all the capital of the other. + +Be cautious then, young ladies; be wary how you engage. Be shy of +loving frankly; never tell all you feel, or (a better way still), feel +very little. See the consequences of being prematurely honest and +confiding, and mistrust yourselves and everybody. Get yourselves +married as they do in France, where the lawyers are the bridesmaids and +confidantes. At any rate, never have any feelings which may make you +uncomfortable, or make any promises which you cannot at any required +moment command and withdraw. That is the way to get on, and be +respected, and have a virtuous character in Vanity Fair. + +If Amelia could have heard the comments regarding her which were made +in the circle from which her father's ruin had just driven her, she +would have seen what her own crimes were, and how entirely her +character was jeopardised. Such criminal imprudence Mrs. Smith never +knew of; such horrid familiarities Mrs. Brown had always condemned, and +the end might be a warning to HER daughters. "Captain Osborne, of +course, could not marry a bankrupt's daughter," the Misses Dobbin said. +"It was quite enough to have been swindled by the father. As for that +little Amelia, her folly had really passed all--" + +"All what?" Captain Dobbin roared out. "Haven't they been engaged ever +since they were children? Wasn't it as good as a marriage? Dare any +soul on earth breathe a word against the sweetest, the purest, the +tenderest, the most angelical of young women?" + +"La, William, don't be so highty-tighty with US. We're not men. We +can't fight you," Miss Jane said. "We've said nothing against Miss +Sedley: but that her conduct throughout was MOST IMPRUDENT, not to call +it by any worse name; and that her parents are people who certainly +merit their misfortunes." + +"Hadn't you better, now that Miss Sedley is free, propose for her +yourself, William?" Miss Ann asked sarcastically. "It would be a most +eligible family connection. He! he!" + +"I marry her!" Dobbin said, blushing very much, and talking quick. "If +you are so ready, young ladies, to chop and change, do you suppose that +she is? Laugh and sneer at that angel. She can't hear it; and she's +miserable and unfortunate, and deserves to be laughed at. Go on +joking, Ann. You're the wit of the family, and the others like to hear +it." + +"I must tell you again we're not in a barrack, William," Miss Ann +remarked. + +"In a barrack, by Jove--I wish anybody in a barrack would say what you +do," cried out this uproused British lion. "I should like to hear a +man breathe a word against her, by Jupiter. But men don't talk in this +way, Ann: it's only women, who get together and hiss, and shriek, and +cackle. There, get away--don't begin to cry. I only said you were a +couple of geese," Will Dobbin said, perceiving Miss Ann's pink eyes +were beginning to moisten as usual. "Well, you're not geese, you're +swans--anything you like, only do, do leave Miss Sedley alone." + +Anything like William's infatuation about that silly little flirting, +ogling thing was never known, the mamma and sisters agreed together in +thinking: and they trembled lest, her engagement being off with +Osborne, she should take up immediately her other admirer and Captain. +In which forebodings these worthy young women no doubt judged according +to the best of their experience; or rather (for as yet they had had no +opportunities of marrying or of jilting) according to their own notions +of right and wrong. + +"It is a mercy, Mamma, that the regiment is ordered abroad," the girls +said. "THIS danger, at any rate, is spared our brother." + +Such, indeed, was the fact; and so it is that the French Emperor comes +in to perform a part in this domestic comedy of Vanity Fair which we +are now playing, and which would never have been enacted without the +intervention of this august mute personage. It was he that ruined the +Bourbons and Mr. John Sedley. It was he whose arrival in his capital +called up all France in arms to defend him there; and all Europe to +oust him. While the French nation and army were swearing fidelity round +the eagles in the Champ de Mars, four mighty European hosts were +getting in motion for the great chasse a l'aigle; and one of these was +a British army, of which two heroes of ours, Captain Dobbin and Captain +Osborne, formed a portion. + +The news of Napoleon's escape and landing was received by the gallant +--th with a fiery delight and enthusiasm, which everybody can +understand who knows that famous corps. From the colonel to the +smallest drummer in the regiment, all were filled with hope and +ambition and patriotic fury; and thanked the French Emperor as for a +personal kindness in coming to disturb the peace of Europe. Now was +the time the --th had so long panted for, to show their comrades in +arms that they could fight as well as the Peninsular veterans, and that +all the pluck and valour of the --th had not been killed by the West +Indies and the yellow fever. Stubble and Spooney looked to get their +companies without purchase. Before the end of the campaign (which she +resolved to share), Mrs. Major O'Dowd hoped to write herself Mrs. +Colonel O'Dowd, C.B. Our two friends (Dobbin and Osborne) were quite +as much excited as the rest: and each in his way--Mr. Dobbin very +quietly, Mr. Osborne very loudly and energetically--was bent upon doing +his duty, and gaining his share of honour and distinction. + +The agitation thrilling through the country and army in consequence of +this news was so great, that private matters were little heeded: and +hence probably George Osborne, just gazetted to his company, busy with +preparations for the march, which must come inevitably, and panting for +further promotion--was not so much affected by other incidents which +would have interested him at a more quiet period. He was not, it must +be confessed, very much cast down by good old Mr. Sedley's catastrophe. +He tried his new uniform, which became him very handsomely, on the day +when the first meeting of the creditors of the unfortunate gentleman +took place. His father told him of the wicked, rascally, shameful +conduct of the bankrupt, reminded him of what he had said about Amelia, +and that their connection was broken off for ever; and gave him that +evening a good sum of money to pay for the new clothes and epaulets in +which he looked so well. Money was always useful to this free-handed +young fellow, and he took it without many words. The bills were up in +the Sedley house, where he had passed so many, many happy hours. He +could see them as he walked from home that night (to the Old +Slaughters', where he put up when in town) shining white in the moon. +That comfortable home was shut, then, upon Amelia and her parents: +where had they taken refuge? The thought of their ruin affected him not +a little. He was very melancholy that night in the coffee-room at the +Slaughters'; and drank a good deal, as his comrades remarked there. + +Dobbin came in presently, cautioned him about the drink, which he only +took, he said, because he was deuced low; but when his friend began to +put to him clumsy inquiries, and asked him for news in a significant +manner, Osborne declined entering into conversation with him, avowing, +however, that he was devilish disturbed and unhappy. + +Three days afterwards, Dobbin found Osborne in his room at the +barracks--his head on the table, a number of papers about, the young +Captain evidently in a state of great despondency. "She--she's sent me +back some things I gave her--some damned trinkets. Look here!" There +was a little packet directed in the well-known hand to Captain George +Osborne, and some things lying about--a ring, a silver knife he had +bought, as a boy, for her at a fair; a gold chain, and a locket with +hair in it. "It's all over," said he, with a groan of sickening +remorse. "Look, Will, you may read it if you like." + +There was a little letter of a few lines, to which he pointed, which +said: + +My papa has ordered me to return to you these presents, which you made +in happier days to me; and I am to write to you for the last time. I +think, I know you feel as much as I do the blow which has come upon us. +It is I that absolve you from an engagement which is impossible in our +present misery. I am sure you had no share in it, or in the cruel +suspicions of Mr. Osborne, which are the hardest of all our griefs to +bear. Farewell. Farewell. I pray God to strengthen me to bear this +and other calamities, and to bless you always. A. + +I shall often play upon the piano--your piano. It was like you to send +it. + +Dobbin was very soft-hearted. The sight of women and children in pain +always used to melt him. The idea of Amelia broken-hearted and lonely +tore that good-natured soul with anguish. And he broke out into an +emotion, which anybody who likes may consider unmanly. He swore that +Amelia was an angel, to which Osborne said aye with all his heart. He, +too, had been reviewing the history of their lives--and had seen her +from her childhood to her present age, so sweet, so innocent, so +charmingly simple, and artlessly fond and tender. + +What a pang it was to lose all that: to have had it and not prized it! +A thousand homely scenes and recollections crowded on him--in which he +always saw her good and beautiful. And for himself, he blushed with +remorse and shame, as the remembrance of his own selfishness and +indifference contrasted with that perfect purity. For a while, glory, +war, everything was forgotten, and the pair of friends talked about her +only. + +"Where are they?" Osborne asked, after a long talk, and a long +pause--and, in truth, with no little shame at thinking that he had +taken no steps to follow her. "Where are they? There's no address to +the note." + +Dobbin knew. He had not merely sent the piano; but had written a note +to Mrs. Sedley, and asked permission to come and see her--and he had +seen her, and Amelia too, yesterday, before he came down to Chatham; +and, what is more, he had brought that farewell letter and packet which +had so moved them. + +The good-natured fellow had found Mrs. Sedley only too willing to +receive him, and greatly agitated by the arrival of the piano, which, +as she conjectured, MUST have come from George, and was a signal of +amity on his part. Captain Dobbin did not correct this error of the +worthy lady, but listened to all her story of complaints and +misfortunes with great sympathy--condoled with her losses and +privations, and agreed in reprehending the cruel conduct of Mr. Osborne +towards his first benefactor. When she had eased her overflowing bosom +somewhat, and poured forth many of her sorrows, he had the courage to +ask actually to see Amelia, who was above in her room as usual, and +whom her mother led trembling downstairs. + +Her appearance was so ghastly, and her look of despair so pathetic, +that honest William Dobbin was frightened as he beheld it; and read the +most fatal forebodings in that pale fixed face. After sitting in his +company a minute or two, she put the packet into his hand, and said, +"Take this to Captain Osborne, if you please, and--and I hope he's +quite well--and it was very kind of you to come and see us--and we like +our new house very much. And I--I think I'll go upstairs, Mamma, for +I'm not very strong." And with this, and a curtsey and a smile, the +poor child went her way. The mother, as she led her up, cast back +looks of anguish towards Dobbin. The good fellow wanted no such +appeal. He loved her himself too fondly for that. Inexpressible +grief, and pity, and terror pursued him, and he came away as if he was +a criminal after seeing her. + +When Osborne heard that his friend had found her, he made hot and +anxious inquiries regarding the poor child. How was she? How did she +look? What did she say? His comrade took his hand, and looked him in +the face. + +"George, she's dying," William Dobbin said--and could speak no more. + +There was a buxom Irish servant-girl, who performed all the duties of +the little house where the Sedley family had found refuge: and this +girl had in vain, on many previous days, striven to give Amelia aid or +consolation. Emmy was much too sad to answer, or even to be aware of +the attempts the other was making in her favour. + +Four hours after the talk between Dobbin and Osborne, this servant-maid +came into Amelia's room, where she sate as usual, brooding +silently over her letters--her little treasures. The girl, smiling, +and looking arch and happy, made many trials to attract poor Emmy's +attention, who, however, took no heed of her. + +"Miss Emmy," said the girl. + +"I'm coming," Emmy said, not looking round. + +"There's a message," the maid went on. "There's +something--somebody--sure, here's a new letter for you--don't be reading +them old ones any more." And she gave her a letter, which Emmy took, and +read. + +"I must see you," the letter said. "Dearest Emmy--dearest +love--dearest wife, come to me." + +George and her mother were outside, waiting until she had read the +letter. + + + +CHAPTER XIX + +Miss Crawley at Nurse + +We have seen how Mrs. Firkin, the lady's maid, as soon as any event of +importance to the Crawley family came to her knowledge, felt bound to +communicate it to Mrs. Bute Crawley, at the Rectory; and have before +mentioned how particularly kind and attentive that good-natured lady +was to Miss Crawley's confidential servant. She had been a gracious +friend to Miss Briggs, the companion, also; and had secured the +latter's good-will by a number of those attentions and promises, which +cost so little in the making, and are yet so valuable and agreeable to +the recipient. Indeed every good economist and manager of a household +must know how cheap and yet how amiable these professions are, and what +a flavour they give to the most homely dish in life. Who was the +blundering idiot who said that "fine words butter no parsnips"? Half +the parsnips of society are served and rendered palatable with no other +sauce. As the immortal Alexis Soyer can make more delicious soup for a +half-penny than an ignorant cook can concoct with pounds of vegetables +and meat, so a skilful artist will make a few simple and pleasing +phrases go farther than ever so much substantial benefit-stock in the +hands of a mere bungler. Nay, we know that substantial benefits often +sicken some stomachs; whereas, most will digest any amount of fine +words, and be always eager for more of the same food. Mrs. Bute had +told Briggs and Firkin so often of the depth of her affection for them; +and what she would do, if she had Miss Crawley's fortune, for friends +so excellent and attached, that the ladies in question had the deepest +regard for her; and felt as much gratitude and confidence as if Mrs. +Bute had loaded them with the most expensive favours. + +Rawdon Crawley, on the other hand, like a selfish heavy dragoon as he +was, never took the least trouble to conciliate his aunt's aides-de-camp, +showed his contempt for the pair with entire frankness--made +Firkin pull off his boots on one occasion--sent her out in the rain on +ignominious messages--and if he gave her a guinea, flung it to her as +if it were a box on the ear. As his aunt, too, made a butt of Briggs, +the Captain followed the example, and levelled his jokes at her--jokes +about as delicate as a kick from his charger. Whereas, Mrs. Bute +consulted her in matters of taste or difficulty, admired her poetry, +and by a thousand acts of kindness and politeness, showed her +appreciation of Briggs; and if she made Firkin a twopenny-halfpenny +present, accompanied it with so many compliments, that the +twopence-half-penny was transmuted into gold in the heart of the +grateful waiting-maid, who, besides, was looking forwards quite +contentedly to some prodigious benefit which must happen to her on the +day when Mrs. Bute came into her fortune. + +The different conduct of these two people is pointed out respectfully +to the attention of persons commencing the world. Praise everybody, I +say to such: never be squeamish, but speak out your compliment both +point-blank in a man's face, and behind his back, when you know there +is a reasonable chance of his hearing it again. Never lose a chance of +saying a kind word. As Collingwood never saw a vacant place in his +estate but he took an acorn out of his pocket and popped it in; so deal +with your compliments through life. An acorn costs nothing; but it may +sprout into a prodigious bit of timber. + +In a word, during Rawdon Crawley's prosperity, he was only obeyed with +sulky acquiescence; when his disgrace came, there was nobody to help or +pity him. Whereas, when Mrs. Bute took the command at Miss Crawley's +house, the garrison there were charmed to act under such a leader, +expecting all sorts of promotion from her promises, her generosity, and +her kind words. + +That he would consider himself beaten, after one defeat, and make no +attempt to regain the position he had lost, Mrs. Bute Crawley never +allowed herself to suppose. She knew Rebecca to be too clever and +spirited and desperate a woman to submit without a struggle; and felt +that she must prepare for that combat, and be incessantly watchful +against assault; or mine, or surprise. + +In the first place, though she held the town, was she sure of the +principal inhabitant? Would Miss Crawley herself hold out; and had she +not a secret longing to welcome back the ousted adversary? The old +lady liked Rawdon, and Rebecca, who amused her. Mrs. Bute could not +disguise from herself the fact that none of her party could so +contribute to the pleasures of the town-bred lady. "My girls' singing, +after that little odious governess's, I know is unbearable," the candid +Rector's wife owned to herself. "She always used to go to sleep when +Martha and Louisa played their duets. Jim's stiff college manners and +poor dear Bute's talk about his dogs and horses always annoyed her. If +I took her to the Rectory, she would grow angry with us all, and fly, I +know she would; and might fall into that horrid Rawdon's clutches +again, and be the victim of that little viper of a Sharp. Meanwhile, +it is clear to me that she is exceedingly unwell, and cannot move for +some weeks, at any rate; during which we must think of some plan to +protect her from the arts of those unprincipled people." + +In the very best of moments, if anybody told Miss Crawley that she was, +or looked ill, the trembling old lady sent off for her doctor; and I +daresay she was very unwell after the sudden family event, which might +serve to shake stronger nerves than hers. At least, Mrs. Bute thought +it was her duty to inform the physician, and the apothecary, and the +dame-de-compagnie, and the domestics, that Miss Crawley was in a most +critical state, and that they were to act accordingly. She had the +street laid knee-deep with straw; and the knocker put by with Mr. +Bowls's plate. She insisted that the Doctor should call twice a day; +and deluged her patient with draughts every two hours. When anybody +entered the room, she uttered a shshshsh so sibilant and ominous, that +it frightened the poor old lady in her bed, from which she could not +look without seeing Mrs. Bute's beady eyes eagerly fixed on her, as the +latter sate steadfast in the arm-chair by the bedside. They seemed to +lighten in the dark (for she kept the curtains closed) as she moved +about the room on velvet paws like a cat. There Miss Crawley lay for +days--ever so many days--Mr. Bute reading books of devotion to her: for +nights, long nights, during which she had to hear the watchman sing, +the night-light sputter; visited at midnight, the last thing, by the +stealthy apothecary; and then left to look at Mrs. Bute's twinkling +eyes, or the flicks of yellow that the rushlight threw on the dreary +darkened ceiling. Hygeia herself would have fallen sick under such a +regimen; and how much more this poor old nervous victim? It has been +said that when she was in health and good spirits, this venerable +inhabitant of Vanity Fair had as free notions about religion and morals +as Monsieur de Voltaire himself could desire, but when illness overtook +her, it was aggravated by the most dreadful terrors of death, and an +utter cowardice took possession of the prostrate old sinner. + +Sick-bed homilies and pious reflections are, to be sure, out of place +in mere story-books, and we are not going (after the fashion of some +novelists of the present day) to cajole the public into a sermon, when +it is only a comedy that the reader pays his money to witness. But, +without preaching, the truth may surely be borne in mind, that the +bustle, and triumph, and laughter, and gaiety which Vanity Fair +exhibits in public, do not always pursue the performer into private +life, and that the most dreary depression of spirits and dismal +repentances sometimes overcome him. Recollection of the best ordained +banquets will scarcely cheer sick epicures. Reminiscences of the most +becoming dresses and brilliant ball triumphs will go very little way to +console faded beauties. Perhaps statesmen, at a particular period of +existence, are not much gratified at thinking over the most triumphant +divisions; and the success or the pleasure of yesterday becomes of very +small account when a certain (albeit uncertain) morrow is in view, +about which all of us must some day or other be speculating. O brother +wearers of motley! Are there not moments when one grows sick of +grinning and tumbling, and the jingling of cap and bells? This, dear +friends and companions, is my amiable object--to walk with you through +the Fair, to examine the shops and the shows there; and that we should +all come home after the flare, and the noise, and the gaiety, and be +perfectly miserable in private. + +"If that poor man of mine had a head on his shoulders," Mrs. Bute +Crawley thought to herself, "how useful he might be, under present +circumstances, to this unhappy old lady! He might make her repent of +her shocking free-thinking ways; he might urge her to do her duty, and +cast off that odious reprobate who has disgraced himself and his +family; and he might induce her to do justice to my dear girls and the +two boys, who require and deserve, I am sure, every assistance which +their relatives can give them." + +And, as the hatred of vice is always a progress towards virtue, Mrs. +Bute Crawley endeavoured to instil her sister-in-law a proper +abhorrence for all Rawdon Crawley's manifold sins: of which his uncle's +wife brought forward such a catalogue as indeed would have served to +condemn a whole regiment of young officers. If a man has committed +wrong in life, I don't know any moralist more anxious to point his +errors out to the world than his own relations; so Mrs. Bute showed a +perfect family interest and knowledge of Rawdon's history. She had all +the particulars of that ugly quarrel with Captain Marker, in which +Rawdon, wrong from the beginning, ended in shooting the Captain. She +knew how the unhappy Lord Dovedale, whose mamma had taken a house at +Oxford, so that he might be educated there, and who had never touched a +card in his life till he came to London, was perverted by Rawdon at the +Cocoa-Tree, made helplessly tipsy by this abominable seducer and +perverter of youth, and fleeced of four thousand pounds. She described +with the most vivid minuteness the agonies of the country families whom +he had ruined--the sons whom he had plunged into dishonour and +poverty--the daughters whom he had inveigled into perdition. She knew +the poor tradesmen who were bankrupt by his extravagance--the mean +shifts and rogueries with which he had ministered to it--the astounding +falsehoods by which he had imposed upon the most generous of aunts, and +the ingratitude and ridicule by which he had repaid her sacrifices. +She imparted these stories gradually to Miss Crawley; gave her the +whole benefit of them; felt it to be her bounden duty as a Christian +woman and mother of a family to do so; had not the smallest remorse or +compunction for the victim whom her tongue was immolating; nay, very +likely thought her act was quite meritorious, and plumed herself upon +her resolute manner of performing it. Yes, if a man's character is to +be abused, say what you will, there's nobody like a relation to do the +business. And one is bound to own, regarding this unfortunate wretch +of a Rawdon Crawley, that the mere truth was enough to condemn him, and +that all inventions of scandal were quite superfluous pains on his +friends' parts. + +Rebecca, too, being now a relative, came in for the fullest share of +Mrs. Bute's kind inquiries. This indefatigable pursuer of truth +(having given strict orders that the door was to be denied to all +emissaries or letters from Rawdon), took Miss Crawley's carriage, and +drove to her old friend Miss Pinkerton, at Minerva House, Chiswick +Mall, to whom she announced the dreadful intelligence of Captain +Rawdon's seduction by Miss Sharp, and from whom she got sundry strange +particulars regarding the ex-governess's birth and early history. The +friend of the Lexicographer had plenty of information to give. Miss +Jemima was made to fetch the drawing-master's receipts and letters. +This one was from a spunging-house: that entreated an advance: another +was full of gratitude for Rebecca's reception by the ladies of +Chiswick: and the last document from the unlucky artist's pen was that +in which, from his dying bed, he recommended his orphan child to Miss +Pinkerton's protection. There were juvenile letters and petitions from +Rebecca, too, in the collection, imploring aid for her father or +declaring her own gratitude. Perhaps in Vanity Fair there are no +better satires than letters. Take a bundle of your dear friend's of +ten years back--your dear friend whom you hate now. Look at a file of +your sister's! how you clung to each other till you quarrelled about +the twenty-pound legacy! Get down the round-hand scrawls of your son +who has half broken your heart with selfish undutifulness since; or a +parcel of your own, breathing endless ardour and love eternal, which +were sent back by your mistress when she married the Nabob--your +mistress for whom you now care no more than for Queen Elizabeth. Vows, +love, promises, confidences, gratitude, how queerly they read after a +while! There ought to be a law in Vanity Fair ordering the destruction +of every written document (except receipted tradesmen's bills) after a +certain brief and proper interval. Those quacks and misanthropes who +advertise indelible Japan ink should be made to perish along with their +wicked discoveries. The best ink for Vanity Fair use would be one that +faded utterly in a couple of days, and left the paper clean and blank, +so that you might write on it to somebody else. + +From Miss Pinkerton's the indefatigable Mrs. Bute followed the track of +Sharp and his daughter back to the lodgings in Greek Street, which the +defunct painter had occupied; and where portraits of the landlady in +white satin, and of the husband in brass buttons, done by Sharp in lieu +of a quarter's rent, still decorated the parlour walls. Mrs. Stokes +was a communicative person, and quickly told all she knew about Mr. +Sharp; how dissolute and poor he was; how good-natured and amusing; +how he was always hunted by bailiffs and duns; how, to the landlady's +horror, though she never could abide the woman, he did not marry his +wife till a short time before her death; and what a queer little wild +vixen his daughter was; how she kept them all laughing with her fun and +mimicry; how she used to fetch the gin from the public-house, and was +known in all the studios in the quarter--in brief, Mrs. Bute got such a +full account of her new niece's parentage, education, and behaviour as +would scarcely have pleased Rebecca, had the latter known that such +inquiries were being made concerning her. + +Of all these industrious researches Miss Crawley had the full benefit. +Mrs. Rawdon Crawley was the daughter of an opera-girl. She had danced +herself. She had been a model to the painters. She was brought up as +became her mother's daughter. She drank gin with her father, &c. &c. +It was a lost woman who was married to a lost man; and the moral to be +inferred from Mrs. Bute's tale was, that the knavery of the pair was +irremediable, and that no properly conducted person should ever notice +them again. + +These were the materials which prudent Mrs. Bute gathered together in +Park Lane, the provisions and ammunition as it were with which she +fortified the house against the siege which she knew that Rawdon and +his wife would lay to Miss Crawley. + +But if a fault may be found with her arrangements, it is this, that she +was too eager: she managed rather too well; undoubtedly she made Miss +Crawley more ill than was necessary; and though the old invalid +succumbed to her authority, it was so harassing and severe, that the +victim would be inclined to escape at the very first chance which fell +in her way. Managing women, the ornaments of their sex--women who +order everything for everybody, and know so much better than any person +concerned what is good for their neighbours, don't sometimes speculate +upon the possibility of a domestic revolt, or upon other extreme +consequences resulting from their overstrained authority. + +Thus, for instance, Mrs. Bute, with the best intentions no doubt in the +world, and wearing herself to death as she did by foregoing sleep, +dinner, fresh air, for the sake of her invalid sister-in-law, carried +her conviction of the old lady's illness so far that she almost managed +her into her coffin. She pointed out her sacrifices and their results +one day to the constant apothecary, Mr. Clump. + +"I am sure, my dear Mr. Clump," she said, "no efforts of mine have been +wanting to restore our dear invalid, whom the ingratitude of her nephew +has laid on the bed of sickness. I never shrink from personal +discomfort: I never refuse to sacrifice myself." + +"Your devotion, it must be confessed, is admirable," Mr. Clump says, +with a low bow; "but--" + +"I have scarcely closed my eyes since my arrival: I give up sleep, +health, every comfort, to my sense of duty. When my poor James was in +the smallpox, did I allow any hireling to nurse him? No." + +"You did what became an excellent mother, my dear Madam--the best of +mothers; but--" + +"As the mother of a family and the wife of an English clergyman, I +humbly trust that my principles are good," Mrs. Bute said, with a happy +solemnity of conviction; "and, as long as Nature supports me, never, +never, Mr. Clump, will I desert the post of duty. Others may bring +that grey head with sorrow to the bed of sickness (here Mrs. Bute, +waving her hand, pointed to one of old Miss Crawley's coffee-coloured +fronts, which was perched on a stand in the dressing-room), but I will +never quit it. Ah, Mr. Clump! I fear, I know, that the couch needs +spiritual as well as medical consolation." + +"What I was going to observe, my dear Madam,"--here the resolute Clump +once more interposed with a bland air--"what I was going to observe +when you gave utterance to sentiments which do you so much honour, was +that I think you alarm yourself needlessly about our kind friend, and +sacrifice your own health too prodigally in her favour." + +"I would lay down my life for my duty, or for any member of my +husband's family," Mrs. Bute interposed. + +"Yes, Madam, if need were; but we don't want Mrs. Bute Crawley to be a +martyr," Clump said gallantly. "Dr. Squills and myself have both +considered Miss Crawley's case with every anxiety and care, as you may +suppose. We see her low-spirited and nervous; family events have +agitated her." + +"Her nephew will come to perdition," Mrs. Crawley cried. + +"Have agitated her: and you arrived like a guardian angel, my dear +Madam, a positive guardian angel, I assure you, to soothe her under the +pressure of calamity. But Dr. Squills and I were thinking that our +amiable friend is not in such a state as renders confinement to her bed +necessary. She is depressed, but this confinement perhaps adds to her +depression. She should have change, fresh air, gaiety; the most +delightful remedies in the pharmacopoeia," Mr. Clump said, grinning and +showing his handsome teeth. "Persuade her to rise, dear Madam; drag +her from her couch and her low spirits; insist upon her taking little +drives. They will restore the roses too to your cheeks, if I may so +speak to Mrs. Bute Crawley." + +"The sight of her horrid nephew casually in the Park, where I am told +the wretch drives with the brazen partner of his crimes," Mrs. Bute +said (letting the cat of selfishness out of the bag of secrecy), "would +cause her such a shock, that we should have to bring her back to bed +again. She must not go out, Mr. Clump. She shall not go out as long +as I remain to watch over her; And as for my health, what matters it? +I give it cheerfully, sir. I sacrifice it at the altar of my duty." + +"Upon my word, Madam," Mr. Clump now said bluntly, "I won't answer for +her life if she remains locked up in that dark room. She is so nervous +that we may lose her any day; and if you wish Captain Crawley to be her +heir, I warn you frankly, Madam, that you are doing your very best to +serve him." + +"Gracious mercy! is her life in danger?" Mrs. Bute cried. "Why, why, +Mr. Clump, did you not inform me sooner?" + +The night before, Mr. Clump and Dr. Squills had had a consultation +(over a bottle of wine at the house of Sir Lapin Warren, whose lady was +about to present him with a thirteenth blessing), regarding Miss +Crawley and her case. + +"What a little harpy that woman from Hampshire is, Clump," Squills +remarked, "that has seized upon old Tilly Crawley. Devilish good +Madeira." + +"What a fool Rawdon Crawley has been," Clump replied, "to go and marry +a governess! There was something about the girl, too." + +"Green eyes, fair skin, pretty figure, famous frontal development," +Squills remarked. "There is something about her; and Crawley was a +fool, Squills." + +"A d---- fool--always was," the apothecary replied. + +"Of course the old girl will fling him over," said the physician, and +after a pause added, "She'll cut up well, I suppose." + +"Cut up," says Clump with a grin; "I wouldn't have her cut up for two +hundred a year." + +"That Hampshire woman will kill her in two months, Clump, my boy, if +she stops about her," Dr. Squills said. "Old woman; full feeder; +nervous subject; palpitation of the heart; pressure on the brain; +apoplexy; off she goes. Get her up, Clump; get her out: or I wouldn't +give many weeks' purchase for your two hundred a year." And it was +acting upon this hint that the worthy apothecary spoke with so much +candour to Mrs. Bute Crawley. + +Having the old lady under her hand: in bed: with nobody near, Mrs. Bute +had made more than one assault upon her, to induce her to alter her +will. But Miss Crawley's usual terrors regarding death increased +greatly when such dismal propositions were made to her, and Mrs. Bute +saw that she must get her patient into cheerful spirits and health +before she could hope to attain the pious object which she had in view. +Whither to take her was the next puzzle. The only place where she is +not likely to meet those odious Rawdons is at church, and that won't +amuse her, Mrs. Bute justly felt. "We must go and visit our beautiful +suburbs of London," she then thought. "I hear they are the most +picturesque in the world"; and so she had a sudden interest for +Hampstead, and Hornsey, and found that Dulwich had great charms for +her, and getting her victim into her carriage, drove her to those +rustic spots, beguiling the little journeys with conversations about +Rawdon and his wife, and telling every story to the old lady which +could add to her indignation against this pair of reprobates. + +Perhaps Mrs. Bute pulled the string unnecessarily tight. For though she +worked up Miss Crawley to a proper dislike of her disobedient nephew, +the invalid had a great hatred and secret terror of her victimizer, and +panted to escape from her. After a brief space, she rebelled against +Highgate and Hornsey utterly. She would go into the Park. Mrs. Bute +knew they would meet the abominable Rawdon there, and she was right. +One day in the ring, Rawdon's stanhope came in sight; Rebecca was +seated by him. In the enemy's equipage Miss Crawley occupied her usual +place, with Mrs. Bute on her left, the poodle and Miss Briggs on the +back seat. It was a nervous moment, and Rebecca's heart beat quick as +she recognized the carriage; and as the two vehicles crossed each other +in a line, she clasped her hands, and looked towards the spinster with +a face of agonized attachment and devotion. Rawdon himself trembled, +and his face grew purple behind his dyed mustachios. Only old Briggs +was moved in the other carriage, and cast her great eyes nervously +towards her old friends. Miss Crawley's bonnet was resolutely turned +towards the Serpentine. Mrs. Bute happened to be in ecstasies with the +poodle, and was calling him a little darling, and a sweet little zoggy, +and a pretty pet. The carriages moved on, each in his line. + +"Done, by Jove," Rawdon said to his wife. + +"Try once more, Rawdon," Rebecca answered. "Could not you lock your +wheels into theirs, dearest?" + +Rawdon had not the heart for that manoeuvre. When the carriages met +again, he stood up in his stanhope; he raised his hand ready to doff +his hat; he looked with all his eyes. But this time Miss Crawley's +face was not turned away; she and Mrs. Bute looked him full in the +face, and cut their nephew pitilessly. He sank back in his seat with +an oath, and striking out of the ring, dashed away desperately +homewards. + +It was a gallant and decided triumph for Mrs. Bute. But she felt the +danger of many such meetings, as she saw the evident nervousness of +Miss Crawley; and she determined that it was most necessary for her +dear friend's health, that they should leave town for a while, and +recommended Brighton very strongly. + + + +CHAPTER XX + +In Which Captain Dobbin Acts as the Messenger of Hymen + +Without knowing how, Captain William Dobbin found himself the great +promoter, arranger, and manager of the match between George Osborne and +Amelia. But for him it never would have taken place: he could not but +confess as much to himself, and smiled rather bitterly as he thought +that he of all men in the world should be the person upon whom the care +of this marriage had fallen. But though indeed the conducting of this +negotiation was about as painful a task as could be set to him, yet +when he had a duty to perform, Captain Dobbin was accustomed to go +through it without many words or much hesitation: and, having made up +his mind completely, that if Miss Sedley was balked of her husband she +would die of the disappointment, he was determined to use all his best +endeavours to keep her alive. + +I forbear to enter into minute particulars of the interview between +George and Amelia, when the former was brought back to the feet (or +should we venture to say the arms?) of his young mistress by the +intervention of his friend honest William. A much harder heart than +George's would have melted at the sight of that sweet face so sadly +ravaged by grief and despair, and at the simple tender accents in which +she told her little broken-hearted story: but as she did not faint when +her mother, trembling, brought Osborne to her; and as she only gave +relief to her overcharged grief, by laying her head on her lover's +shoulder and there weeping for a while the most tender, copious, and +refreshing tears--old Mrs. Sedley, too greatly relieved, thought it was +best to leave the young persons to themselves; and so quitted Emmy +crying over George's hand, and kissing it humbly, as if he were her +supreme chief and master, and as if she were quite a guilty and +unworthy person needing every favour and grace from him. + +This prostration and sweet unrepining obedience exquisitely touched and +flattered George Osborne. He saw a slave before him in that simple +yielding faithful creature, and his soul within him thrilled secretly +somehow at the knowledge of his power. He would be generous-minded, +Sultan as he was, and raise up this kneeling Esther and make a queen of +her: besides, her sadness and beauty touched him as much as her +submission, and so he cheered her, and raised her up and forgave her, +so to speak. All her hopes and feelings, which were dying and +withering, this her sun having been removed from her, bloomed again and +at once, its light being restored. You would scarcely have recognised +the beaming little face upon Amelia's pillow that night as the one that +was laid there the night before, so wan, so lifeless, so careless of +all round about. The honest Irish maid-servant, delighted with the +change, asked leave to kiss the face that had grown all of a sudden so +rosy. Amelia put her arms round the girl's neck and kissed her with +all her heart, like a child. She was little more. She had that night +a sweet refreshing sleep, like one--and what a spring of inexpressible +happiness as she woke in the morning sunshine! + +"He will be here again to-day," Amelia thought. "He is the greatest +and best of men." And the fact is, that George thought he was one of +the generousest creatures alive: and that he was making a tremendous +sacrifice in marrying this young creature. + +While she and Osborne were having their delightful tete-a-tete above +stairs, old Mrs. Sedley and Captain Dobbin were conversing below upon +the state of the affairs, and the chances and future arrangements of +the young people. Mrs. Sedley having brought the two lovers together +and left them embracing each other with all their might, like a true +woman, was of opinion that no power on earth would induce Mr. Sedley to +consent to the match between his daughter and the son of a man who had +so shamefully, wickedly, and monstrously treated him. And she told a +long story about happier days and their earlier splendours, when +Osborne lived in a very humble way in the New Road, and his wife was +too glad to receive some of Jos's little baby things, with which Mrs. +Sedley accommodated her at the birth of one of Osborne's own children. +The fiendish ingratitude of that man, she was sure, had broken Mr. S.'s +heart: and as for a marriage, he would never, never, never, never +consent. + +"They must run away together, Ma'am," Dobbin said, laughing, "and +follow the example of Captain Rawdon Crawley, and Miss Emmy's friend +the little governess." Was it possible? Well she never! Mrs. Sedley +was all excitement about this news. She wished that Blenkinsop were +here to hear it: Blenkinsop always mistrusted that Miss Sharp.-- What +an escape Jos had had! and she described the already well-known +love-passages between Rebecca and the Collector of Boggley Wollah. + +It was not, however, Mr. Sedley's wrath which Dobbin feared, so much as +that of the other parent concerned, and he owned that he had a very +considerable doubt and anxiety respecting the behaviour of the +black-browed old tyrant of a Russia merchant in Russell Square. He has +forbidden the match peremptorily, Dobbin thought. He knew what a savage +determined man Osborne was, and how he stuck by his word. "The only +chance George has of reconcilement," argued his friend, "is by +distinguishing himself in the coming campaign. If he dies they both go +together. If he fails in distinction--what then? He has some money +from his mother, I have heard enough to purchase his majority--or he +must sell out and go and dig in Canada, or rough it in a cottage in the +country." With such a partner Dobbin thought he would not mind +Siberia--and, strange to say, this absurd and utterly imprudent young +fellow never for a moment considered that the want of means to keep a +nice carriage and horses, and of an income which should enable its +possessors to entertain their friends genteelly, ought to operate as +bars to the union of George and Miss Sedley. + +It was these weighty considerations which made him think too that the +marriage should take place as quickly as possible. Was he anxious +himself, I wonder, to have it over?--as people, when death has +occurred, like to press forward the funeral, or when a parting is +resolved upon, hasten it. It is certain that Mr. Dobbin, having taken +the matter in hand, was most extraordinarily eager in the conduct of +it. He urged on George the necessity of immediate action: he showed +the chances of reconciliation with his father, which a favourable +mention of his name in the Gazette must bring about. If need were he +would go himself and brave both the fathers in the business. At all +events, he besought George to go through with it before the orders +came, which everybody expected, for the departure of the regiment from +England on foreign service. + +Bent upon these hymeneal projects, and with the applause and consent of +Mrs. Sedley, who did not care to break the matter personally to her +husband, Mr. Dobbin went to seek John Sedley at his house of call in +the City, the Tapioca Coffee-house, where, since his own offices were +shut up, and fate had overtaken him, the poor broken-down old +gentleman used to betake himself daily, and write letters and receive +them, and tie them up into mysterious bundles, several of which he +carried in the flaps of his coat. I don't know anything more dismal +than that business and bustle and mystery of a ruined man: those +letters from the wealthy which he shows you: those worn greasy +documents promising support and offering condolence which he places +wistfully before you, and on which he builds his hopes of restoration +and future fortune. My beloved reader has no doubt in the course of his +experience been waylaid by many such a luckless companion. He takes +you into the corner; he has his bundle of papers out of his gaping coat +pocket; and the tape off, and the string in his mouth, and the +favourite letters selected and laid before you; and who does not know +the sad eager half-crazy look which he fixes on you with his hopeless +eyes? + +Changed into a man of this sort, Dobbin found the once florid, jovial, +and prosperous John Sedley. His coat, that used to be so glossy and +trim, was white at the seams, and the buttons showed the copper. His +face had fallen in, and was unshorn; his frill and neckcloth hung limp +under his bagging waistcoat. When he used to treat the boys in old +days at a coffee-house, he would shout and laugh louder than anybody +there, and have all the waiters skipping round him; it was quite +painful to see how humble and civil he was to John of the Tapioca, a +blear-eyed old attendant in dingy stockings and cracked pumps, whose +business it was to serve glasses of wafers, and bumpers of ink in +pewter, and slices of paper to the frequenters of this dreary house of +entertainment, where nothing else seemed to be consumed. As for +William Dobbin, whom he had tipped repeatedly in his youth, and who had +been the old gentleman's butt on a thousand occasions, old Sedley gave +his hand to him in a very hesitating humble manner now, and called him +"Sir." A feeling of shame and remorse took possession of William Dobbin +as the broken old man so received and addressed him, as if he himself +had been somehow guilty of the misfortunes which had brought Sedley so +low. + +"I am very glad to see you, Captain Dobbin, sir," says he, after a +skulking look or two at his visitor (whose lanky figure and military +appearance caused some excitement likewise to twinkle in the blear eyes +of the waiter in the cracked dancing pumps, and awakened the old lady +in black, who dozed among the mouldy old coffee-cups in the bar). "How +is the worthy alderman, and my lady, your excellent mother, sir?" He +looked round at the waiter as he said, "My lady," as much as to say, +"Hark ye, John, I have friends still, and persons of rank and +reputation, too." "Are you come to do anything in my way, sir? My +young friends Dale and Spiggot do all my business for me now, until my +new offices are ready; for I'm only here temporarily, you know, +Captain. What can we do for you, sir? Will you like to take anything?" + +Dobbin, with a great deal of hesitation and stuttering, protested that +he was not in the least hungry or thirsty; that he had no business to +transact; that he only came to ask if Mr. Sedley was well, and to shake +hands with an old friend; and, he added, with a desperate perversion of +truth, "My mother is very well--that is, she's been very unwell, and is +only waiting for the first fine day to go out and call upon Mrs. +Sedley. How is Mrs. Sedley, sir? I hope she's quite well." And here +he paused, reflecting on his own consummate hypocrisy; for the day was +as fine, and the sunshine as bright as it ever is in Coffin Court, +where the Tapioca Coffee-house is situated: and Mr. Dobbin remembered +that he had seen Mrs. Sedley himself only an hour before, having driven +Osborne down to Fulham in his gig, and left him there tete-a-tete with +Miss Amelia. + +"My wife will be very happy to see her ladyship," Sedley replied, +pulling out his papers. "I've a very kind letter here from your +father, sir, and beg my respectful compliments to him. Lady D. will +find us in rather a smaller house than we were accustomed to receive +our friends in; but it's snug, and the change of air does good to my +daughter, who was suffering in town rather--you remember little Emmy, +sir?--yes, suffering a good deal." The old gentleman's eyes were +wandering as he spoke, and he was thinking of something else, as he +sate thrumming on his papers and fumbling at the worn red tape. + +"You're a military man," he went on; "I ask you, Bill Dobbin, could any +man ever have speculated upon the return of that Corsican scoundrel +from Elba? When the allied sovereigns were here last year, and we gave +'em that dinner in the City, sir, and we saw the Temple of Concord, and +the fireworks, and the Chinese bridge in St. James's Park, could any +sensible man suppose that peace wasn't really concluded, after we'd +actually sung Te Deum for it, sir? I ask you, William, could I suppose +that the Emperor of Austria was a damned traitor--a traitor, and +nothing more? I don't mince words--a double-faced infernal traitor and +schemer, who meant to have his son-in-law back all along. And I say +that the escape of Boney from Elba was a damned imposition and plot, +sir, in which half the powers of Europe were concerned, to bring the +funds down, and to ruin this country. That's why I'm here, William. +That's why my name's in the Gazette. Why, sir?--because I trusted the +Emperor of Russia and the Prince Regent. Look here. Look at my +papers. Look what the funds were on the 1st of March--what the French +fives were when I bought for the count. And what they're at now. +There was collusion, sir, or that villain never would have escaped. +Where was the English Commissioner who allowed him to get away? He +ought to be shot, sir--brought to a court-martial, and shot, by Jove." + +"We're going to hunt Boney out, sir," Dobbin said, rather alarmed at +the fury of the old man, the veins of whose forehead began to swell, +and who sate drumming his papers with his clenched fist. "We are going +to hunt him out, sir--the Duke's in Belgium already, and we expect +marching orders every day." + +"Give him no quarter. Bring back the villain's head, sir. Shoot the +coward down, sir," Sedley roared. "I'd enlist myself, by--; but I'm a +broken old man--ruined by that damned scoundrel--and by a parcel of +swindling thieves in this country whom I made, sir, and who are rolling +in their carriages now," he added, with a break in his voice. + +Dobbin was not a little affected by the sight of this once kind old +friend, crazed almost with misfortune and raving with senile anger. +Pity the fallen gentleman: you to whom money and fair repute are the +chiefest good; and so, surely, are they in Vanity Fair. + +"Yes," he continued, "there are some vipers that you warm, and they +sting you afterwards. There are some beggars that you put on +horseback, and they're the first to ride you down. You know whom I +mean, William Dobbin, my boy. I mean a purse-proud villain in Russell +Square, whom I knew without a shilling, and whom I pray and hope to see +a beggar as he was when I befriended him." + +"I have heard something of this, sir, from my friend George," Dobbin +said, anxious to come to his point. "The quarrel between you and his +father has cut him up a great deal, sir. Indeed, I'm the bearer of a +message from him." + +"O, THAT'S your errand, is it?" cried the old man, jumping up. "What! +perhaps he condoles with me, does he? Very kind of him, the +stiff-backed prig, with his dandified airs and West End swagger. He's +hankering about my house, is he still? If my son had the courage of a +man, he'd shoot him. He's as big a villain as his father. I won't +have his name mentioned in my house. I curse the day that ever I let +him into it; and I'd rather see my daughter dead at my feet than +married to him." + +"His father's harshness is not George's fault, sir. Your daughter's +love for him is as much your doing as his. Who are you, that you are +to play with two young people's affections and break their hearts at +your will?" + +"Recollect it's not his father that breaks the match off," old Sedley +cried out. "It's I that forbid it. That family and mine are separated +for ever. I'm fallen low, but not so low as that: no, no. And so you +may tell the whole race--son, and father and sisters, and all." + +"It's my belief, sir, that you have not the power or the right to +separate those two," Dobbin answered in a low voice; "and that if you +don't give your daughter your consent it will be her duty to marry +without it. There's no reason she should die or live miserably because +you are wrong-headed. To my thinking, she's just as much married as if +the banns had been read in all the churches in London. And what better +answer can there be to Osborne's charges against you, as charges there +are, than that his son claims to enter your family and marry your +daughter?" + +A light of something like satisfaction seemed to break over old Sedley +as this point was put to him: but he still persisted that with his +consent the marriage between Amelia and George should never take place. + +"We must do it without," Dobbin said, smiling, and told Mr. Sedley, as +he had told Mrs. Sedley in the day, before, the story of Rebecca's +elopement with Captain Crawley. It evidently amused the old gentleman. +"You're terrible fellows, you Captains," said he, tying up his papers; +and his face wore something like a smile upon it, to the astonishment +of the blear-eyed waiter who now entered, and had never seen such an +expression upon Sedley's countenance since he had used the dismal +coffee-house. + +The idea of hitting his enemy Osborne such a blow soothed, perhaps, the +old gentleman: and, their colloquy presently ending, he and Dobbin +parted pretty good friends. + +"My sisters say she has diamonds as big as pigeons' eggs," George said, +laughing. "How they must set off her complexion! A perfect +illumination it must be when her jewels are on her neck. Her +jet-black hair is as curly as Sambo's. I dare say she wore a nose ring +when she went to court; and with a plume of feathers in her top-knot +she would look a perfect Belle Sauvage." + +George, in conversation with Amelia, was rallying the appearance of a +young lady of whom his father and sisters had lately made the +acquaintance, and who was an object of vast respect to the Russell +Square family. She was reported to have I don't know how many +plantations in the West Indies; a deal of money in the funds; and three +stars to her name in the East India stockholders' list. She had a +mansion in Surrey, and a house in Portland Place. The name of the rich +West India heiress had been mentioned with applause in the Morning +Post. Mrs. Haggistoun, Colonel Haggistoun's widow, her relative, +"chaperoned" her, and kept her house. She was just from school, where +she had completed her education, and George and his sisters had met her +at an evening party at old Hulker's house, Devonshire Place (Hulker, +Bullock, and Co. were long the correspondents of her house in the West +Indies), and the girls had made the most cordial advances to her, which +the heiress had received with great good humour. An orphan in her +position--with her money--so interesting! the Misses Osborne said. +They were full of their new friend when they returned from the Hulker +ball to Miss Wirt, their companion; they had made arrangements for +continually meeting, and had the carriage and drove to see her the very +next day. Mrs. Haggistoun, Colonel Haggistoun's widow, a relation of +Lord Binkie, and always talking of him, struck the dear unsophisticated +girls as rather haughty, and too much inclined to talk about her great +relations: but Rhoda was everything they could wish--the frankest, +kindest, most agreeable creature--wanting a little polish, but so +good-natured. The girls Christian-named each other at once. + +"You should have seen her dress for court, Emmy," Osborne cried, +laughing. "She came to my sisters to show it off, before she was +presented in state by my Lady Binkie, the Haggistoun's kinswoman. She's +related to every one, that Haggistoun. Her diamonds blazed out like +Vauxhall on the night we were there. (Do you remember Vauxhall, Emmy, +and Jos singing to his dearest diddle diddle darling?) Diamonds and +mahogany, my dear! think what an advantageous contrast--and the white +feathers in her hair--I mean in her wool. She had earrings like +chandeliers; you might have lighted 'em up, by Jove--and a yellow satin +train that streeled after her like the tail of a comet." + +"How old is she?" asked Emmy, to whom George was rattling away +regarding this dark paragon, on the morning of their reunion--rattling +away as no other man in the world surely could. + +"Why the Black Princess, though she has only just left school, must be +two or three and twenty. And you should see the hand she writes! Mrs. +Colonel Haggistoun usually writes her letters, but in a moment of +confidence, she put pen to paper for my sisters; she spelt satin +satting, and Saint James's, Saint Jams." + +"Why, surely it must be Miss Swartz, the parlour boarder," Emmy said, +remembering that good-natured young mulatto girl, who had been so +hysterically affected when Amelia left Miss Pinkerton's academy. + +"The very name," George said. "Her father was a German Jew--a +slave-owner they say--connected with the Cannibal Islands in some way +or other. He died last year, and Miss Pinkerton has finished her +education. She can play two pieces on the piano; she knows three +songs; she can write when Mrs. Haggistoun is by to spell for her; and +Jane and Maria already have got to love her as a sister." + +"I wish they would have loved me," said Emmy, wistfully. "They were +always very cold to me." + +"My dear child, they would have loved you if you had had two hundred +thousand pounds," George replied. "That is the way in which they have +been brought up. Ours is a ready-money society. We live among bankers +and City big-wigs, and be hanged to them, and every man, as he talks to +you, is jingling his guineas in his pocket. There is that jackass Fred +Bullock is going to marry Maria--there's Goldmore, the East India +Director, there's Dipley, in the tallow trade--OUR trade," George said, +with an uneasy laugh and a blush. "Curse the whole pack of +money-grubbing vulgarians! I fall asleep at their great heavy dinners. +I feel ashamed in my father's great stupid parties. I've been +accustomed to live with gentlemen, and men of the world and fashion, +Emmy, not with a parcel of turtle-fed tradesmen. Dear little woman, +you are the only person of our set who ever looked, or thought, or +spoke like a lady: and you do it because you're an angel and can't help +it. Don't remonstrate. You are the only lady. Didn't Miss Crawley +remark it, who has lived in the best company in Europe? And as for +Crawley, of the Life Guards, hang it, he's a fine fellow: and I like +him for marrying the girl he had chosen." + +Amelia admired Mr. Crawley very much, too, for this; and trusted +Rebecca would be happy with him, and hoped (with a laugh) Jos would be +consoled. And so the pair went on prattling, as in quite early days. +Amelia's confidence being perfectly restored to her, though she +expressed a great deal of pretty jealousy about Miss Swartz, and +professed to be dreadfully frightened--like a hypocrite as she was--lest +George should forget her for the heiress and her money and her +estates in Saint Kitt's. But the fact is, she was a great deal too +happy to have fears or doubts or misgivings of any sort: and having +George at her side again, was not afraid of any heiress or beauty, or +indeed of any sort of danger. + +When Captain Dobbin came back in the afternoon to these people--which +he did with a great deal of sympathy for them--it did his heart good to +see how Amelia had grown young again--how she laughed, and chirped, and +sang familiar old songs at the piano, which were only interrupted by +the bell from without proclaiming Mr. Sedley's return from the City, +before whom George received a signal to retreat. + +Beyond the first smile of recognition--and even that was an hypocrisy, +for she thought his arrival rather provoking--Miss Sedley did not once +notice Dobbin during his visit. But he was content, so that he saw her +happy; and thankful to have been the means of making her so. + + + +CHAPTER XXI + +A Quarrel About an Heiress + +Love may be felt for any young lady endowed with such qualities as Miss +Swartz possessed; and a great dream of ambition entered into old Mr. +Osborne's soul, which she was to realize. He encouraged, with the +utmost enthusiasm and friendliness, his daughters' amiable attachment +to the young heiress, and protested that it gave him the sincerest +pleasure as a father to see the love of his girls so well disposed. + +"You won't find," he would say to Miss Rhoda, "that splendour and rank +to which you are accustomed at the West End, my dear Miss, at our +humble mansion in Russell Square. My daughters are plain, +disinterested girls, but their hearts are in the right place, and +they've conceived an attachment for you which does them honour--I say, +which does them honour. I'm a plain, simple, humble British +merchant--an honest one, as my respected friends Hulker and Bullock +will vouch, who were the correspondents of your late lamented father. +You'll find us a united, simple, happy, and I think I may say +respected, family--a plain table, a plain people, but a warm welcome, +my dear Miss Rhoda--Rhoda, let me say, for my heart warms to you, it +does really. I'm a frank man, and I like you. A glass of Champagne! +Hicks, Champagne to Miss Swartz." + +There is little doubt that old Osborne believed all he said, and that +the girls were quite earnest in their protestations of affection for +Miss Swartz. People in Vanity Fair fasten on to rich folks quite +naturally. If the simplest people are disposed to look not a little +kindly on great Prosperity (for I defy any member of the British public +to say that the notion of Wealth has not something awful and pleasing +to him; and you, if you are told that the man next you at dinner has +got half a million, not to look at him with a certain interest)--if the +simple look benevolently on money, how much more do your old worldlings +regard it! Their affections rush out to meet and welcome money. Their +kind sentiments awaken spontaneously towards the interesting possessors +of it. I know some respectable people who don't consider themselves at +liberty to indulge in friendship for any individual who has not a +certain competency, or place in society. They give a loose to their +feelings on proper occasions. And the proof is, that the major part of +the Osborne family, who had not, in fifteen years, been able to get up +a hearty regard for Amelia Sedley, became as fond of Miss Swartz in the +course of a single evening as the most romantic advocate of friendship +at first sight could desire. + +What a match for George she'd be (the sisters and Miss Wirt agreed), +and how much better than that insignificant little Amelia! Such a +dashing young fellow as he is, with his good looks, rank, and +accomplishments, would be the very husband for her. Visions of balls +in Portland Place, presentations at Court, and introductions to half +the peerage, filled the minds of the young ladies; who talked of +nothing but George and his grand acquaintances to their beloved new +friend. + +Old Osborne thought she would be a great match, too, for his son. He +should leave the army; he should go into Parliament; he should cut a +figure in the fashion and in the state. His blood boiled with honest +British exultation, as he saw the name of Osborne ennobled in the +person of his son, and thought that he might be the progenitor of a +glorious line of baronets. He worked in the City and on 'Change, until +he knew everything relating to the fortune of the heiress, how her +money was placed, and where her estates lay. Young Fred Bullock, one +of his chief informants, would have liked to make a bid for her himself +(it was so the young banker expressed it), only he was booked to Maria +Osborne. But not being able to secure her as a wife, the disinterested +Fred quite approved of her as a sister-in-law. "Let George cut in +directly and win her," was his advice. "Strike while the iron's hot, +you know--while she's fresh to the town: in a few weeks some d---- +fellow from the West End will come in with a title and a rotten +rent-roll and cut all us City men out, as Lord Fitzrufus did last year +with Miss Grogram, who was actually engaged to Podder, of Podder & +Brown's. The sooner it is done the better, Mr. Osborne; them's my +sentiments," the wag said; though, when Osborne had left the bank +parlour, Mr. Bullock remembered Amelia, and what a pretty girl she was, +and how attached to George Osborne; and he gave up at least ten seconds +of his valuable time to regretting the misfortune which had befallen +that unlucky young woman. + +While thus George Osborne's good feelings, and his good friend and +genius, Dobbin, were carrying back the truant to Amelia's feet, +George's parent and sisters were arranging this splendid match for him, +which they never dreamed he would resist. + +When the elder Osborne gave what he called "a hint," there was no +possibility for the most obtuse to mistake his meaning. He called +kicking a footman downstairs a hint to the latter to leave his service. +With his usual frankness and delicacy he told Mrs. Haggistoun that he +would give her a cheque for five thousand pounds on the day his son was +married to her ward; and called that proposal a hint, and considered it +a very dexterous piece of diplomacy. He gave George finally such +another hint regarding the heiress; and ordered him to marry her out of +hand, as he would have ordered his butler to draw a cork, or his clerk +to write a letter. + +This imperative hint disturbed George a good deal. He was in the very +first enthusiasm and delight of his second courtship of Amelia, which +was inexpressibly sweet to him. The contrast of her manners and +appearance with those of the heiress, made the idea of a union with the +latter appear doubly ludicrous and odious. Carriages and opera-boxes, +thought he; fancy being seen in them by the side of such a mahogany +charmer as that! Add to all that the junior Osborne was quite as +obstinate as the senior: when he wanted a thing, quite as firm in his +resolution to get it; and quite as violent when angered, as his father +in his most stern moments. + +On the first day when his father formally gave him the hint that he was +to place his affections at Miss Swartz's feet, George temporised with +the old gentleman. "You should have thought of the matter sooner, +sir," he said. "It can't be done now, when we're expecting every day to +go on foreign service. Wait till my return, if I do return"; and then +he represented, that the time when the regiment was daily expecting to +quit England, was exceedingly ill-chosen: that the few days or weeks +during which they were still to remain at home, must be devoted to +business and not to love-making: time enough for that when he came home +with his majority; "for, I promise you," said he, with a satisfied air, +"that one way or other you shall read the name of George Osborne in the +Gazette." + +The father's reply to this was founded upon the information which he +had got in the City: that the West End chaps would infallibly catch +hold of the heiress if any delay took place: that if he didn't marry +Miss S., he might at least have an engagement in writing, to come into +effect when he returned to England; and that a man who could get ten +thousand a year by staying at home, was a fool to risk his life abroad. + +"So that you would have me shown up as a coward, sir, and our name +dishonoured for the sake of Miss Swartz's money," George interposed. + +This remark staggered the old gentleman; but as he had to reply to it, +and as his mind was nevertheless made up, he said, "You will dine here +to-morrow, sir, and every day Miss Swartz comes, you will be here to +pay your respects to her. If you want for money, call upon Mr. +Chopper." Thus a new obstacle was in George's way, to interfere with +his plans regarding Amelia; and about which he and Dobbin had more than +one confidential consultation. His friend's opinion respecting the +line of conduct which he ought to pursue, we know already. And as for +Osborne, when he was once bent on a thing, a fresh obstacle or two only +rendered him the more resolute. + +The dark object of the conspiracy into which the chiefs of the Osborne +family had entered, was quite ignorant of all their plans regarding her +(which, strange to say, her friend and chaperon did not divulge), and, +taking all the young ladies' flattery for genuine sentiment, and being, +as we have before had occasion to show, of a very warm and impetuous +nature, responded to their affection with quite a tropical ardour. And +if the truth may be told, I dare say that she too had some selfish +attraction in the Russell Square house; and in a word, thought George +Osborne a very nice young man. His whiskers had made an impression upon +her, on the very first night she beheld them at the ball at Messrs. +Hulkers; and, as we know, she was not the first woman who had been +charmed by them. George had an air at once swaggering and melancholy, +languid and fierce. He looked like a man who had passions, secrets, +and private harrowing griefs and adventures. His voice was rich and +deep. He would say it was a warm evening, or ask his partner to take +an ice, with a tone as sad and confidential as if he were breaking her +mother's death to her, or preluding a declaration of love. He trampled +over all the young bucks of his father's circle, and was the hero among +those third-rate men. Some few sneered at him and hated him. Some, +like Dobbin, fanatically admired him. And his whiskers had begun to do +their work, and to curl themselves round the affections of Miss Swartz. + +Whenever there was a chance of meeting him in Russell Square, that +simple and good-natured young woman was quite in a flurry to see her +dear Misses Osborne. She went to great expenses in new gowns, and +bracelets, and bonnets, and in prodigious feathers. She adorned her +person with her utmost skill to please the Conqueror, and exhibited all +her simple accomplishments to win his favour. The girls would ask her, +with the greatest gravity, for a little music, and she would sing her +three songs and play her two little pieces as often as ever they asked, +and with an always increasing pleasure to herself. During these +delectable entertainments, Miss Wirt and the chaperon sate by, and +conned over the peerage, and talked about the nobility. + +The day after George had his hint from his father, and a short time +before the hour of dinner, he was lolling upon a sofa in the +drawing-room in a very becoming and perfectly natural attitude of +melancholy. He had been, at his father's request, to Mr. Chopper in +the City (the old gentleman, though he gave great sums to his son, +would never specify any fixed allowance for him, and rewarded him only +as he was in the humour). He had then been to pass three hours with +Amelia, his dear little Amelia, at Fulham; and he came home to find his +sisters spread in starched muslin in the drawing-room, the dowagers +cackling in the background, and honest Swartz in her favourite +amber-coloured satin, with turquoise bracelets, countless rings, +flowers, feathers, and all sorts of tags and gimcracks, about as +elegantly decorated as a she chimney-sweep on May-day. + +The girls, after vain attempts to engage him in conversation, talked +about fashions and the last drawing-room until he was perfectly sick of +their chatter. He contrasted their behaviour with little Emmy's--their +shrill voices with her tender ringing tones; their attitudes and their +elbows and their starch, with her humble soft movements and modest +graces. Poor Swartz was seated in a place where Emmy had been +accustomed to sit. Her bejewelled hands lay sprawling in her amber +satin lap. Her tags and ear-rings twinkled, and her big eyes rolled +about. She was doing nothing with perfect contentment, and thinking +herself charming. Anything so becoming as the satin the sisters had +never seen. + +"Dammy," George said to a confidential friend, "she looked like a China +doll, which has nothing to do all day but to grin and wag its head. By +Jove, Will, it was all I I could do to prevent myself from throwing the +sofa-cushion at her." He restrained that exhibition of sentiment, +however. + +The sisters began to play the Battle of Prague. "Stop that d---- +thing," George howled out in a fury from the sofa. "It makes me mad. +You play us something, Miss Swartz, do. Sing something, anything but +the Battle of Prague." + +"Shall I sing 'Blue Eyed Mary' or the air from the Cabinet?" Miss +Swartz asked. + +"That sweet thing from the Cabinet," the sisters said. + +"We've had that," replied the misanthrope on the sofa. + +"I can sing 'Fluvy du Tajy,'" Swartz said, in a meek voice, "if I had +the words." It was the last of the worthy young woman's collection. + +"O, 'Fleuve du Tage,'" Miss Maria cried; "we have the song," and went +off to fetch the book in which it was. + +Now it happened that this song, then in the height of the fashion, had +been given to the young ladies by a young friend of theirs, whose name +was on the title, and Miss Swartz, having concluded the ditty with +George's applause (for he remembered that it was a favourite of +Amelia's), was hoping for an encore perhaps, and fiddling with the +leaves of the music, when her eye fell upon the title, and she saw +"Amelia Sedley" written in the comer. + +"Lor!" cried Miss Swartz, spinning swiftly round on the music-stool, +"is it my Amelia? Amelia that was at Miss P.'s at Hammersmith? I know +it is. It's her, and-- Tell me about her--where is she?" + +"Don't mention her," Miss Maria Osborne said hastily. "Her family has +disgraced itself. Her father cheated Papa, and as for her, she is +never to be mentioned HERE." This was Miss Maria's return for George's +rudeness about the Battle of Prague. + +"Are you a friend of Amelia's?" George said, bouncing up. "God bless +you for it, Miss Swartz. Don't believe what the girls say. SHE'S not +to blame at any rate. She's the best--" + +"You know you're not to speak about her, George," cried Jane. "Papa +forbids it." + +"Who's to prevent me?" George cried out. "I will speak of her. I say +she's the best, the kindest, the gentlest, the sweetest girl in +England; and that, bankrupt or no, my sisters are not fit to hold +candles to her. If you like her, go and see her, Miss Swartz; she +wants friends now; and I say, God bless everybody who befriends her. +Anybody who speaks kindly of her is my friend; anybody who speaks +against her is my enemy. Thank you, Miss Swartz"; and he went up and +wrung her hand. + +"George! George!" one of the sisters cried imploringly. + +"I say," George said fiercely, "I thank everybody who loves Amelia +Sed--" He stopped. Old Osborne was in the room with a face livid with +rage, and eyes like hot coals. + +Though George had stopped in his sentence, yet, his blood being up, he +was not to be cowed by all the generations of Osborne; rallying +instantly, he replied to the bullying look of his father, with another +so indicative of resolution and defiance that the elder man quailed in +his turn, and looked away. He felt that the tussle was coming. "Mrs. +Haggistoun, let me take you down to dinner," he said. "Give your arm to +Miss Swartz, George," and they marched. + +"Miss Swartz, I love Amelia, and we've been engaged almost all our +lives," Osborne said to his partner; and during all the dinner, George +rattled on with a volubility which surprised himself, and made his +father doubly nervous for the fight which was to take place as soon as +the ladies were gone. + +The difference between the pair was, that while the father was violent +and a bully, the son had thrice the nerve and courage of the parent, +and could not merely make an attack, but resist it; and finding that +the moment was now come when the contest between him and his father was +to be decided, he took his dinner with perfect coolness and appetite +before the engagement began. Old Osborne, on the contrary, was +nervous, and drank much. He floundered in his conversation with the +ladies, his neighbours: George's coolness only rendering him more +angry. It made him half mad to see the calm way in which George, +flapping his napkin, and with a swaggering bow, opened the door for the +ladies to leave the room; and filling himself a glass of wine, smacked +it, and looked his father full in the face, as if to say, "Gentlemen of +the Guard, fire first." The old man also took a supply of ammunition, +but his decanter clinked against the glass as he tried to fill it. + +After giving a great heave, and with a purple choking face, he then +began. "How dare you, sir, mention that person's name before Miss +Swartz to-day, in my drawing-room? I ask you, sir, how dare you do it?" + +"Stop, sir," says George, "don't say dare, sir. Dare isn't a word to +be used to a Captain in the British Army." + +"I shall say what I like to my son, sir. I can cut him off with a +shilling if I like. I can make him a beggar if I like. I WILL say what +I like," the elder said. + +"I'm a gentleman though I AM your son, sir," George answered haughtily. +"Any communications which you have to make to me, or any orders which +you may please to give, I beg may be couched in that kind of language +which I am accustomed to hear." + +Whenever the lad assumed his haughty manner, it always created either +great awe or great irritation in the parent. Old Osborne stood in +secret terror of his son as a better gentleman than himself; and +perhaps my readers may have remarked in their experience of this Vanity +Fair of ours, that there is no character which a low-minded man so much +mistrusts as that of a gentleman. + +"My father didn't give me the education you have had, nor the +advantages you have had, nor the money you have had. If I had kept the +company SOME FOLKS have had through MY MEANS, perhaps my son wouldn't +have any reason to brag, sir, of his SUPERIORITY and WEST END AIRS +(these words were uttered in the elder Osborne's most sarcastic tones). +But it wasn't considered the part of a gentleman, in MY time, for a man +to insult his father. If I'd done any such thing, mine would have +kicked me downstairs, sir." + +"I never insulted you, sir. I said I begged you to remember your son +was a gentleman as well as yourself. I know very well that you give me +plenty of money," said George (fingering a bundle of notes which he had +got in the morning from Mr. Chopper). "You tell it me often enough, +sir. There's no fear of my forgetting it." + +"I wish you'd remember other things as well, sir," the sire answered. +"I wish you'd remember that in this house--so long as you choose to +HONOUR it with your COMPANY, Captain--I'm the master, and that name, +and that that--that you--that I say--" + +"That what, sir?" George asked, with scarcely a sneer, filling another +glass of claret. + +"----!" burst out his father with a screaming oath--"that the name of +those Sedleys never be mentioned here, sir--not one of the whole damned +lot of 'em, sir." + +"It wasn't I, sir, that introduced Miss Sedley's name. It was my +sisters who spoke ill of her to Miss Swartz; and by Jove I'll defend +her wherever I go. Nobody shall speak lightly of that name in my +presence. Our family has done her quite enough injury already, I +think, and may leave off reviling her now she's down. I'll shoot any +man but you who says a word against her." + +"Go on, sir, go on," the old gentleman said, his eyes starting out of +his head. + +"Go on about what, sir? about the way in which we've treated that angel +of a girl? Who told me to love her? It was your doing. I might have +chosen elsewhere, and looked higher, perhaps, than your society: but I +obeyed you. And now that her heart's mine you give me orders to fling +it away, and punish her, kill her perhaps--for the faults of other +people. It's a shame, by Heavens," said George, working himself up +into passion and enthusiasm as he proceeded, "to play at fast and loose +with a young girl's affections--and with such an angel as that--one so +superior to the people amongst whom she lived, that she might have +excited envy, only she was so good and gentle, that it's a wonder +anybody dared to hate her. If I desert her, sir, do you suppose she +forgets me?" + +"I ain't going to have any of this dam sentimental nonsense and humbug +here, sir," the father cried out. "There shall be no beggar-marriages +in my family. If you choose to fling away eight thousand a year, which +you may have for the asking, you may do it: but by Jove you take your +pack and walk out of this house, sir. Will you do as I tell you, once +for all, sir, or will you not?" + +"Marry that mulatto woman?" George said, pulling up his shirt-collars. +"I don't like the colour, sir. Ask the black that sweeps opposite +Fleet Market, sir. I'm not going to marry a Hottentot Venus." + +Mr. Osborne pulled frantically at the cord by which he was accustomed +to summon the butler when he wanted wine--and almost black in the face, +ordered that functionary to call a coach for Captain Osborne. + +"I've done it," said George, coming into the Slaughters' an hour +afterwards, looking very pale. + +"What, my boy?" says Dobbin. + +George told what had passed between his father and himself. + +"I'll marry her to-morrow," he said with an oath. "I love her more +every day, Dobbin." + + + +CHAPTER XXII + +A Marriage and Part of a Honeymoon + +Enemies the most obstinate and courageous can't hold out against +starvation; so the elder Osborne felt himself pretty easy about his +adversary in the encounter we have just described; and as soon as +George's supplies fell short, confidently expected his unconditional +submission. It was unlucky, to be sure, that the lad should have +secured a stock of provisions on the very day when the first encounter +took place; but this relief was only temporary, old Osborne thought, +and would but delay George's surrender. No communication passed +between father and son for some days. The former was sulky at this +silence, but not disquieted; for, as he said, he knew where he could +put the screw upon George, and only waited the result of that +operation. He told the sisters the upshot of the dispute between them, +but ordered them to take no notice of the matter, and welcome George on +his return as if nothing had happened. His cover was laid as usual +every day, and perhaps the old gentleman rather anxiously expected him; +but he never came. Some one inquired at the Slaughters' regarding him, +where it was said that he and his friend Captain Dobbin had left town. + +One gusty, raw day at the end of April--the rain whipping the pavement +of that ancient street where the old Slaughters' Coffee-house was once +situated--George Osborne came into the coffee-room, looking very +haggard and pale; although dressed rather smartly in a blue coat and +brass buttons, and a neat buff waistcoat of the fashion of those days. +Here was his friend Captain Dobbin, in blue and brass too, having +abandoned the military frock and French-grey trousers, which were the +usual coverings of his lanky person. + +Dobbin had been in the coffee-room for an hour or more. He had tried +all the papers, but could not read them. He had looked at the clock +many scores of times; and at the street, where the rain was pattering +down, and the people as they clinked by in pattens, left long +reflections on the shining stone: he tattooed at the table: he bit his +nails most completely, and nearly to the quick (he was accustomed to +ornament his great big hands in this way): he balanced the tea-spoon +dexterously on the milk jug: upset it, &c., &c.; and in fact showed +those signs of disquietude, and practised those desperate attempts at +amusement, which men are accustomed to employ when very anxious, and +expectant, and perturbed in mind. + +Some of his comrades, gentlemen who used the room, joked him about the +splendour of his costume and his agitation of manner. One asked him if +he was going to be married? Dobbin laughed, and said he would send his +acquaintance (Major Wagstaff of the Engineers) a piece of cake when +that event took place. At length Captain Osborne made his appearance, +very smartly dressed, but very pale and agitated as we have said. He +wiped his pale face with a large yellow bandanna pocket-handkerchief +that was prodigiously scented. He shook hands with Dobbin, looked at +the clock, and told John, the waiter, to bring him some curacao. Of +this cordial he swallowed off a couple of glasses with nervous +eagerness. His friend asked with some interest about his health. + +"Couldn't get a wink of sleep till daylight, Dob," said he. "Infernal +headache and fever. Got up at nine, and went down to the Hummums for a +bath. I say, Dob, I feel just as I did on the morning I went out with +Rocket at Quebec." + +"So do I," William responded. "I was a deuced deal more nervous than +you were that morning. You made a famous breakfast, I remember. Eat +something now." + +"You're a good old fellow, Will. I'll drink your health, old boy, and +farewell to--" + +"No, no; two glasses are enough," Dobbin interrupted him. "Here, take +away the liqueurs, John. Have some cayenne-pepper with your fowl. +Make haste though, for it is time we were there." + +It was about half an hour from twelve when this brief meeting and +colloquy took place between the two captains. A coach, into which +Captain Osborne's servant put his master's desk and dressing-case, had +been in waiting for some time; and into this the two gentlemen hurried +under an umbrella, and the valet mounted on the box, cursing the rain +and the dampness of the coachman who was steaming beside him. "We +shall find a better trap than this at the church-door," says he; +"that's a comfort." And the carriage drove on, taking the road down +Piccadilly, where Apsley House and St. George's Hospital wore red +jackets still; where there were oil-lamps; where Achilles was not yet +born; nor the Pimlico arch raised; nor the hideous equestrian monster +which pervades it and the neighbourhood; and so they drove down by +Brompton to a certain chapel near the Fulham Road there. + +A chariot was in waiting with four horses; likewise a coach of the kind +called glass coaches. Only a very few idlers were collected on account +of the dismal rain. + +"Hang it!" said George, "I said only a pair." + +"My master would have four," said Mr. Joseph Sedley's servant, who was +in waiting; and he and Mr. Osborne's man agreed as they followed George +and William into the church, that it was a "reg'lar shabby turn hout; +and with scarce so much as a breakfast or a wedding faviour." + +"Here you are," said our old friend, Jos Sedley, coming forward. +"You're five minutes late, George, my boy. What a day, eh? Demmy, it's +like the commencement of the rainy season in Bengal. But you'll find +my carriage is watertight. Come along, my mother and Emmy are in the +vestry." + +Jos Sedley was splendid. He was fatter than ever. His shirt collars +were higher; his face was redder; his shirt-frill flaunted gorgeously +out of his variegated waistcoat. Varnished boots were not invented as +yet; but the Hessians on his beautiful legs shone so, that they must +have been the identical pair in which the gentleman in the old picture +used to shave himself; and on his light green coat there bloomed a fine +wedding favour, like a great white spreading magnolia. + +In a word, George had thrown the great cast. He was going to be +married. Hence his pallor and nervousness--his sleepless night and +agitation in the morning. I have heard people who have gone through +the same thing own to the same emotion. After three or four +ceremonies, you get accustomed to it, no doubt; but the first dip, +everybody allows, is awful. + +The bride was dressed in a brown silk pelisse (as Captain Dobbin has +since informed me), and wore a straw bonnet with a pink ribbon; over +the bonnet she had a veil of white Chantilly lace, a gift from Mr. +Joseph Sedley, her brother. Captain Dobbin himself had asked leave to +present her with a gold chain and watch, which she sported on this +occasion; and her mother gave her her diamond brooch--almost the only +trinket which was left to the old lady. As the service went on, Mrs. +Sedley sat and whimpered a great deal in a pew, consoled by the Irish +maid-servant and Mrs. Clapp from the lodgings. Old Sedley would not be +present. Jos acted for his father, giving away the bride, whilst +Captain Dobbin stepped up as groomsman to his friend George. + +There was nobody in the church besides the officiating persons and the +small marriage party and their attendants. The two valets sat aloof +superciliously. The rain came rattling down on the windows. In the +intervals of the service you heard it, and the sobbing of old Mrs. +Sedley in the pew. The parson's tones echoed sadly through the empty +walls. Osborne's "I will" was sounded in very deep bass. Emmy's +response came fluttering up to her lips from her heart, but was +scarcely heard by anybody except Captain Dobbin. + +When the service was completed, Jos Sedley came forward and kissed his +sister, the bride, for the first time for many months--George's look of +gloom had gone, and he seemed quite proud and radiant. "It's your turn, +William," says he, putting his hand fondly upon Dobbin's shoulder; and +Dobbin went up and touched Amelia on the cheek. + +Then they went into the vestry and signed the register. "God bless you, +Old Dobbin," George said, grasping him by the hand, with something very +like moisture glistening in his eyes. William replied only by nodding +his head. His heart was too full to say much. + +"Write directly, and come down as soon as you can, you know," Osborne +said. After Mrs. Sedley had taken an hysterical adieu of her daughter, +the pair went off to the carriage. "Get out of the way, you little +devils," George cried to a small crowd of damp urchins, that were +hanging about the chapel-door. The rain drove into the bride and +bridegroom's faces as they passed to the chariot. The postilions' +favours draggled on their dripping jackets. The few children made a +dismal cheer, as the carriage, splashing mud, drove away. + +William Dobbin stood in the church-porch, looking at it, a queer +figure. The small crew of spectators jeered him. He was not thinking +about them or their laughter. + +"Come home and have some tiffin, Dobbin," a voice cried behind him; as +a pudgy hand was laid on his shoulder, and the honest fellow's reverie +was interrupted. But the Captain had no heart to go a-feasting with +Jos Sedley. He put the weeping old lady and her attendants into the +carriage along with Jos, and left them without any farther words +passing. This carriage, too, drove away, and the urchins gave another +sarcastical cheer. + +"Here, you little beggars," Dobbin said, giving some sixpences amongst +them, and then went off by himself through the rain. It was all over. +They were married, and happy, he prayed God. Never since he was a boy +had he felt so miserable and so lonely. He longed with a heart-sick +yearning for the first few days to be over, that he might see her again. + +Some ten days after the above ceremony, three young men of our +acquaintance were enjoying that beautiful prospect of bow windows on +the one side and blue sea on the other, which Brighton affords to the +traveller. Sometimes it is towards the ocean--smiling with countless +dimples, speckled with white sails, with a hundred bathing-machines +kissing the skirt of his blue garment--that the Londoner looks +enraptured: sometimes, on the contrary, a lover of human nature rather +than of prospects of any kind, it is towards the bow windows that he +turns, and that swarm of human life which they exhibit. From one issue +the notes of a piano, which a young lady in ringlets practises six +hours daily, to the delight of the fellow-lodgers: at another, lovely +Polly, the nurse-maid, may be seen dandling Master Omnium in her arms: +whilst Jacob, his papa, is beheld eating prawns, and devouring the +Times for breakfast, at the window below. Yonder are the Misses Leery, +who are looking out for the young officers of the Heavies, who are +pretty sure to be pacing the cliff; or again it is a City man, with a +nautical turn, and a telescope, the size of a six-pounder, who has his +instrument pointed seawards, so as to command every pleasure-boat, +herring-boat, or bathing-machine that comes to, or quits, the shore, +&c., &c. But have we any leisure for a description of Brighton?--for +Brighton, a clean Naples with genteel lazzaroni--for Brighton, that +always looks brisk, gay, and gaudy, like a harlequin's jacket--for +Brighton, which used to be seven hours distant from London at the time +of our story; which is now only a hundred minutes off; and which may +approach who knows how much nearer, unless Joinville comes and untimely +bombards it? + +"What a monstrous fine girl that is in the lodgings over the +milliner's," one of these three promenaders remarked to the other; +"Gad, Crawley, did you see what a wink she gave me as I passed?" + +"Don't break her heart, Jos, you rascal," said another. "Don't trifle +with her affections, you Don Juan!" + +"Get away," said Jos Sedley, quite pleased, and leering up at the +maid-servant in question with a most killing ogle. Jos was even more +splendid at Brighton than he had been at his sister's marriage. He had +brilliant under-waistcoats, any one of which would have set up a +moderate buck. He sported a military frock-coat, ornamented with frogs, +knobs, black buttons, and meandering embroidery. He had affected a +military appearance and habits of late; and he walked with his two +friends, who were of that profession, clinking his boot-spurs, +swaggering prodigiously, and shooting death-glances at all the servant +girls who were worthy to be slain. + +"What shall we do, boys, till the ladies return?" the buck asked. The +ladies were out to Rottingdean in his carriage on a drive. + +"Let's have a game at billiards," one of his friends said--the tall +one, with lacquered mustachios. + +"No, dammy; no, Captain," Jos replied, rather alarmed. "No billiards +to-day, Crawley, my boy; yesterday was enough." + +"You play very well," said Crawley, laughing. "Don't he, Osborne? How +well he made that five stroke, eh?" + +"Famous," Osborne said. "Jos is a devil of a fellow at billiards, and +at everything else, too. I wish there were any tiger-hunting about +here! we might go and kill a few before dinner. (There goes a fine +girl! what an ankle, eh, Jos?) Tell us that story about the tiger-hunt, +and the way you did for him in the jungle--it's a wonderful story that, +Crawley." Here George Osborne gave a yawn. "It's rather slow work," +said he, "down here; what shall we do?" + +"Shall we go and look at some horses that Snaffler's just brought from +Lewes fair?" Crawley said. + +"Suppose we go and have some jellies at Dutton's," and the rogue Jos, +willing to kill two birds with one stone. "Devilish fine gal at +Dutton's." + +"Suppose we go and see the Lightning come in, it's just about time?" +George said. This advice prevailing over the stables and the jelly, +they turned towards the coach-office to witness the Lightning's arrival. + +As they passed, they met the carriage--Jos Sedley's open carriage, with +its magnificent armorial bearings--that splendid conveyance in which he +used to drive, about at Cheltenham, majestic and solitary, with his +arms folded, and his hat cocked; or, more happy, with ladies by his +side. + +Two were in the carriage now: one a little person, with light hair, and +dressed in the height of the fashion; the other in a brown silk +pelisse, and a straw bonnet with pink ribbons, with a rosy, round, +happy face, that did you good to behold. She checked the carriage as +it neared the three gentlemen, after which exercise of authority she +looked rather nervous, and then began to blush most absurdly. "We have +had a delightful drive, George," she said, "and--and we're so glad to +come back; and, Joseph, don't let him be late." + +"Don't be leading our husbands into mischief, Mr. Sedley, you wicked, +wicked man you," Rebecca said, shaking at Jos a pretty little finger +covered with the neatest French kid glove. "No billiards, no smoking, +no naughtiness!" + +"My dear Mrs. Crawley--Ah now! upon my honour!" was all Jos could +ejaculate by way of reply; but he managed to fall into a tolerable +attitude, with his head lying on his shoulder, grinning upwards at his +victim, with one hand at his back, which he supported on his cane, and +the other hand (the one with the diamond ring) fumbling in his +shirt-frill and among his under-waistcoats. As the carriage drove off +he kissed the diamond hand to the fair ladies within. He wished all +Cheltenham, all Chowringhee, all Calcutta, could see him in that +position, waving his hand to such a beauty, and in company with such a +famous buck as Rawdon Crawley of the Guards. + +Our young bride and bridegroom had chosen Brighton as the place where +they would pass the first few days after their marriage; and having +engaged apartments at the Ship Inn, enjoyed themselves there in great +comfort and quietude, until Jos presently joined them. Nor was he the +only companion they found there. As they were coming into the hotel +from a sea-side walk one afternoon, on whom should they light but +Rebecca and her husband. The recognition was immediate. Rebecca flew +into the arms of her dearest friend. Crawley and Osborne shook hands +together cordially enough: and Becky, in the course of a very few +hours, found means to make the latter forget that little unpleasant +passage of words which had happened between them. "Do you remember the +last time we met at Miss Crawley's, when I was so rude to you, dear +Captain Osborne? I thought you seemed careless about dear Amelia. It +was that made me angry: and so pert: and so unkind: and so ungrateful. +Do forgive me!" Rebecca said, and she held out her hand with so frank +and winning a grace, that Osborne could not but take it. By humbly and +frankly acknowledging yourself to be in the wrong, there is no knowing, +my son, what good you may do. I knew once a gentleman and very worthy +practitioner in Vanity Fair, who used to do little wrongs to his +neighbours on purpose, and in order to apologise for them in an open +and manly way afterwards--and what ensued? My friend Crocky Doyle was +liked everywhere, and deemed to be rather impetuous--but the honestest +fellow. Becky's humility passed for sincerity with George Osborne. + +These two young couples had plenty of tales to relate to each other. +The marriages of either were discussed; and their prospects in life +canvassed with the greatest frankness and interest on both sides. +George's marriage was to be made known to his father by his friend +Captain Dobbin; and young Osborne trembled rather for the result of +that communication. Miss Crawley, on whom all Rawdon's hopes depended, +still held out. Unable to make an entry into her house in Park Lane, +her affectionate nephew and niece had followed her to Brighton, where +they had emissaries continually planted at her door. + +"I wish you could see some of Rawdon's friends who are always about our +door," Rebecca said, laughing. "Did you ever see a dun, my dear; or a +bailiff and his man? Two of the abominable wretches watched all last +week at the greengrocer's opposite, and we could not get away until +Sunday. If Aunty does not relent, what shall we do?" + +Rawdon, with roars of laughter, related a dozen amusing anecdotes of +his duns, and Rebecca's adroit treatment of them. He vowed with a +great oath that there was no woman in Europe who could talk a creditor +over as she could. Almost immediately after their marriage, her +practice had begun, and her husband found the immense value of such a +wife. They had credit in plenty, but they had bills also in abundance, +and laboured under a scarcity of ready money. Did these +debt-difficulties affect Rawdon's good spirits? No. Everybody in +Vanity Fair must have remarked how well those live who are comfortably +and thoroughly in debt: how they deny themselves nothing; how jolly and +easy they are in their minds. Rawdon and his wife had the very best +apartments at the inn at Brighton; the landlord, as he brought in the +first dish, bowed before them as to his greatest customers: and Rawdon +abused the dinners and wine with an audacity which no grandee in the +land could surpass. Long custom, a manly appearance, faultless boots +and clothes, and a happy fierceness of manner, will often help a man as +much as a great balance at the banker's. + +The two wedding parties met constantly in each other's apartments. +After two or three nights the gentlemen of an evening had a little +piquet, as their wives sate and chatted apart. This pastime, and the +arrival of Jos Sedley, who made his appearance in his grand open +carriage, and who played a few games at billiards with Captain Crawley, +replenished Rawdon's purse somewhat, and gave him the benefit of that +ready money for which the greatest spirits are sometimes at a +stand-still. + +So the three gentlemen walked down to see the Lightning coach come in. +Punctual to the minute, the coach crowded inside and out, the guard +blowing his accustomed tune on the horn--the Lightning came tearing +down the street, and pulled up at the coach-office. + +"Hullo! there's old Dobbin," George cried, quite delighted to see his +old friend perched on the roof; and whose promised visit to Brighton +had been delayed until now. "How are you, old fellow? Glad you're come +down. Emmy'll be delighted to see you," Osborne said, shaking his +comrade warmly by the hand as soon as his descent from the vehicle was +effected--and then he added, in a lower and agitated voice, "What's the +news? Have you been in Russell Square? What does the governor say? +Tell me everything." + +Dobbin looked very pale and grave. "I've seen your father," said he. +"How's Amelia--Mrs. George? I'll tell you all the news presently: but +I've brought the great news of all: and that is--" + +"Out with it, old fellow," George said. + +"We're ordered to Belgium. All the army goes--guards and all. +Heavytop's got the gout, and is mad at not being able to move. O'Dowd +goes in command, and we embark from Chatham next week." This news of +war could not but come with a shock upon our lovers, and caused all +these gentlemen to look very serious. + + + +CHAPTER XXIII + +Captain Dobbin Proceeds on His Canvass + +What is the secret mesmerism which friendship possesses, and under the +operation of which a person ordinarily sluggish, or cold, or timid, +becomes wise, active, and resolute, in another's behalf? As Alexis, +after a few passes from Dr. Elliotson, despises pain, reads with the +back of his head, sees miles off, looks into next week, and performs +other wonders, of which, in his own private normal condition, he is +quite incapable; so you see, in the affairs of the world and under the +magnetism of friendships, the modest man becomes bold, the shy +confident, the lazy active, or the impetuous prudent and peaceful. +What is it, on the other hand, that makes the lawyer eschew his own +cause, and call in his learned brother as an adviser? And what causes +the doctor, when ailing, to send for his rival, and not sit down and +examine his own tongue in the chimney glass, or write his own +prescription at his study-table? I throw out these queries for +intelligent readers to answer, who know, at once, how credulous we are, +and how sceptical, how soft and how obstinate, how firm for others and +how diffident about ourselves: meanwhile, it is certain that our +friend William Dobbin, who was personally of so complying a disposition +that if his parents had pressed him much, it is probable he would have +stepped down into the kitchen and married the cook, and who, to further +his own interests, would have found the most insuperable difficulty in +walking across the street, found himself as busy and eager in the +conduct of George Osborne's affairs, as the most selfish tactician +could be in the pursuit of his own. + +Whilst our friend George and his young wife were enjoying the first +blushing days of the honeymoon at Brighton, honest William was left as +George's plenipotentiary in London, to transact all the business part +of the marriage. His duty it was to call upon old Sedley and his wife, +and to keep the former in good humour: to draw Jos and his +brother-in-law nearer together, so that Jos's position and dignity, as +collector of Boggley Wollah, might compensate for his father's loss of +station, and tend to reconcile old Osborne to the alliance: and +finally, to communicate it to the latter in such a way as should least +irritate the old gentleman. + +Now, before he faced the head of the Osborne house with the news which +it was his duty to tell, Dobbin bethought him that it would be politic +to make friends of the rest of the family, and, if possible, have the +ladies on his side. They can't be angry in their hearts, thought he. +No woman ever was really angry at a romantic marriage. A little crying +out, and they must come round to their brother; when the three of us +will lay siege to old Mr. Osborne. So this Machiavellian captain of +infantry cast about him for some happy means or stratagem by which he +could gently and gradually bring the Misses Osborne to a knowledge of +their brother's secret. + +By a little inquiry regarding his mother's engagements, he was pretty +soon able to find out by whom of her ladyship's friends parties were +given at that season; where he would be likely to meet Osborne's +sisters; and, though he had that abhorrence of routs and evening +parties which many sensible men, alas! entertain, he soon found one +where the Misses Osborne were to be present. Making his appearance at +the ball, where he danced a couple of sets with both of them, and was +prodigiously polite, he actually had the courage to ask Miss Osborne +for a few minutes' conversation at an early hour the next day, when he +had, he said, to communicate to her news of the very greatest interest. + +What was it that made her start back, and gaze upon him for a moment, +and then on the ground at her feet, and make as if she would faint on +his arm, had he not by opportunely treading on her toes, brought the +young lady back to self-control? Why was she so violently agitated at +Dobbin's request? This can never be known. But when he came the next +day, Maria was not in the drawing-room with her sister, and Miss Wirt +went off for the purpose of fetching the latter, and the Captain and +Miss Osborne were left together. They were both so silent that the +ticktock of the Sacrifice of Iphigenia clock on the mantelpiece became +quite rudely audible. + +"What a nice party it was last night," Miss Osborne at length began, +encouragingly; "and--and how you're improved in your dancing, Captain +Dobbin. Surely somebody has taught you," she added, with amiable +archness. + +"You should see me dance a reel with Mrs. Major O'Dowd of ours; and a +jig--did you ever see a jig? But I think anybody could dance with you, +Miss Osborne, who dance so well." + +"Is the Major's lady young and beautiful, Captain?" the fair questioner +continued. "Ah, what a terrible thing it must be to be a soldier's +wife! I wonder they have any spirits to dance, and in these dreadful +times of war, too! O Captain Dobbin, I tremble sometimes when I think +of our dearest George, and the dangers of the poor soldier. Are there +many married officers of the --th, Captain Dobbin?" + +"Upon my word, she's playing her hand rather too openly," Miss Wirt +thought; but this observation is merely parenthetic, and was not heard +through the crevice of the door at which the governess uttered it. + +"One of our young men is just married," Dobbin said, now coming to the +point. "It was a very old attachment, and the young couple are as poor +as church mice." "O, how delightful! O, how romantic!" Miss Osborne +cried, as the Captain said "old attachment" and "poor." Her sympathy +encouraged him. + +"The finest young fellow in the regiment," he continued. "Not a braver +or handsomer officer in the army; and such a charming wife! How you +would like her! how you will like her when you know her, Miss +Osborne." The young lady thought the actual moment had arrived, and +that Dobbin's nervousness which now came on and was visible in many +twitchings of his face, in his manner of beating the ground with his +great feet, in the rapid buttoning and unbuttoning of his frock-coat, +&c.--Miss Osborne, I say, thought that when he had given himself a +little air, he would unbosom himself entirely, and prepared eagerly to +listen. And the clock, in the altar on which Iphigenia was situated, +beginning, after a preparatory convulsion, to toll twelve, the mere +tolling seemed as if it would last until one--so prolonged was the +knell to the anxious spinster. + +"But it's not about marriage that I came to speak--that is that +marriage--that is--no, I mean--my dear Miss Osborne, it's about our +dear friend George," Dobbin said. + +"About George?" she said in a tone so discomfited that Maria and Miss +Wirt laughed at the other side of the door, and even that abandoned +wretch of a Dobbin felt inclined to smile himself; for he was not +altogether unconscious of the state of affairs: George having often +bantered him gracefully and said, "Hang it, Will, why don't you take +old Jane? She'll have you if you ask her. I'll bet you five to two she +will." + +"Yes, about George, then," he continued. "There has been a difference +between him and Mr. Osborne. And I regard him so much--for you know +we have been like brothers--that I hope and pray the quarrel may be +settled. We must go abroad, Miss Osborne. We may be ordered off at a +day's warning. Who knows what may happen in the campaign? Don't be +agitated, dear Miss Osborne; and those two at least should part +friends." + +"There has been no quarrel, Captain Dobbin, except a little usual scene +with Papa," the lady said. "We are expecting George back daily. What +Papa wanted was only for his good. He has but to come back, and I'm +sure all will be well; and dear Rhoda, who went away from here in sad +sad anger, I know will forgive him. Woman forgives but too readily, +Captain." + +"Such an angel as YOU I am sure would," Mr. Dobbin said, with atrocious +astuteness. "And no man can pardon himself for giving a woman pain. +What would you feel, if a man were faithless to you?" + +"I should perish--I should throw myself out of window--I should take +poison--I should pine and die. I know I should," Miss cried, who had +nevertheless gone through one or two affairs of the heart without any +idea of suicide. + +"And there are others," Dobbin continued, "as true and as kind-hearted +as yourself. I'm not speaking about the West Indian heiress, Miss +Osborne, but about a poor girl whom George once loved, and who was bred +from her childhood to think of nobody but him. I've seen her in her +poverty uncomplaining, broken-hearted, without a fault. It is of Miss +Sedley I speak. Dear Miss Osborne, can your generous heart quarrel +with your brother for being faithful to her? Could his own conscience +ever forgive him if he deserted her? Be her friend--she always loved +you--and--and I am come here charged by George to tell you that he +holds his engagement to her as the most sacred duty he has; and to +entreat you, at least, to be on his side." + +When any strong emotion took possession of Mr. Dobbin, and after the +first word or two of hesitation, he could speak with perfect fluency, +and it was evident that his eloquence on this occasion made some +impression upon the lady whom he addressed. + +"Well," said she, "this is--most surprising--most painful--most +extraordinary--what will Papa say?--that George should fling away such +a superb establishment as was offered to him but at any rate he has +found a very brave champion in you, Captain Dobbin. It is of no use, +however," she continued, after a pause; "I feel for poor Miss Sedley, +most certainly--most sincerely, you know. We never thought the match a +good one, though we were always very kind to her here--very. But Papa +will never consent, I am sure. And a well brought up young woman, you +know--with a well-regulated mind, must--George must give her up, dear +Captain Dobbin, indeed he must." + +"Ought a man to give up the woman he loved, just when misfortune befell +her?" Dobbin said, holding out his hand. "Dear Miss Osborne, is this +the counsel I hear from you? My dear young lady! you must befriend +her. He can't give her up. He must not give her up. Would a man, +think you, give YOU up if you were poor?" + +This adroit question touched the heart of Miss Jane Osborne not a +little. "I don't know whether we poor girls ought to believe what you +men say, Captain," she said. "There is that in woman's tenderness which +induces her to believe too easily. I'm afraid you are cruel, cruel +deceivers,"--and Dobbin certainly thought he felt a pressure of the +hand which Miss Osborne had extended to him. + +He dropped it in some alarm. "Deceivers!" said he. "No, dear Miss +Osborne, all men are not; your brother is not; George has loved Amelia +Sedley ever since they were children; no wealth would make him marry +any but her. Ought he to forsake her? Would you counsel him to do so?" + +What could Miss Jane say to such a question, and with her own peculiar +views? She could not answer it, so she parried it by saying, "Well, if +you are not a deceiver, at least you are very romantic"; and Captain +William let this observation pass without challenge. + +At length when, by the help of farther polite speeches, he deemed that +Miss Osborne was sufficiently prepared to receive the whole news, he +poured it into her ear. "George could not give up Amelia--George was +married to her"--and then he related the circumstances of the marriage +as we know them already: how the poor girl would have died had not her +lover kept his faith: how Old Sedley had refused all consent to the +match, and a licence had been got: and Jos Sedley had come from +Cheltenham to give away the bride: how they had gone to Brighton in +Jos's chariot-and-four to pass the honeymoon: and how George counted on +his dear kind sisters to befriend him with their father, as women--so +true and tender as they were--assuredly would do. And so, asking +permission (readily granted) to see her again, and rightly conjecturing +that the news he had brought would be told in the next five minutes to +the other ladies, Captain Dobbin made his bow and took his leave. + +He was scarcely out of the house, when Miss Maria and Miss Wirt rushed +in to Miss Osborne, and the whole wonderful secret was imparted to them +by that lady. To do them justice, neither of the sisters was very much +displeased. There is something about a runaway match with which few +ladies can be seriously angry, and Amelia rather rose in their +estimation, from the spirit which she had displayed in consenting to +the union. As they debated the story, and prattled about it, and +wondered what Papa would do and say, came a loud knock, as of an +avenging thunder-clap, at the door, which made these conspirators +start. It must be Papa, they thought. But it was not he. It was only +Mr. Frederick Bullock, who had come from the City according to +appointment, to conduct the ladies to a flower-show. + +This gentleman, as may be imagined, was not kept long in ignorance of +the secret. But his face, when he heard it, showed an amazement which +was very different to that look of sentimental wonder which the +countenances of the sisters wore. Mr. Bullock was a man of the world, +and a junior partner of a wealthy firm. He knew what money was, and +the value of it: and a delightful throb of expectation lighted up his +little eyes, and caused him to smile on his Maria, as he thought that +by this piece of folly of Mr. George's she might be worth thirty +thousand pounds more than he had ever hoped to get with her. + +"Gad! Jane," said he, surveying even the elder sister with some +interest, "Eels will be sorry he cried off. You may be a fifty +thousand pounder yet." + +The sisters had never thought of the money question up to that moment, +but Fred Bullock bantered them with graceful gaiety about it during +their forenoon's excursion; and they had risen not a little in their +own esteem by the time when, the morning amusement over, they drove +back to dinner. And do not let my respected reader exclaim against +this selfishness as unnatural. It was but this present morning, as he +rode on the omnibus from Richmond; while it changed horses, this +present chronicler, being on the roof, marked three little children +playing in a puddle below, very dirty, and friendly, and happy. To +these three presently came another little one. "POLLY," says she, "YOUR +SISTER'S GOT A PENNY." At which the children got up from the puddle +instantly, and ran off to pay their court to Peggy. And as the omnibus +drove off I saw Peggy with the infantine procession at her tail, +marching with great dignity towards the stall of a neighbouring +lollipop-woman. + + + +CHAPTER XXIV + +In Which Mr. Osborne Takes Down the Family Bible + +So having prepared the sisters, Dobbin hastened away to the City to +perform the rest and more difficult part of the task which he had +undertaken. The idea of facing old Osborne rendered him not a little +nervous, and more than once he thought of leaving the young ladies to +communicate the secret, which, as he was aware, they could not long +retain. But he had promised to report to George upon the manner in +which the elder Osborne bore the intelligence; so going into the City +to the paternal counting-house in Thames Street, he despatched thence a +note to Mr. Osborne begging for a half-hour's conversation relative to +the affairs of his son George. Dobbin's messenger returned from Mr. +Osborne's house of business, with the compliments of the latter, who +would be very happy to see the Captain immediately, and away +accordingly Dobbin went to confront him. + +The Captain, with a half-guilty secret to confess, and with the +prospect of a painful and stormy interview before him, entered Mr. +Osborne's offices with a most dismal countenance and abashed gait, and, +passing through the outer room where Mr. Chopper presided, was greeted +by that functionary from his desk with a waggish air which farther +discomfited him. Mr. Chopper winked and nodded and pointed his pen +towards his patron's door, and said, "You'll find the governor all +right," with the most provoking good humour. + +Osborne rose too, and shook him heartily by the hand, and said, "How +do, my dear boy?" with a cordiality that made poor George's ambassador +feel doubly guilty. His hand lay as if dead in the old gentleman's +grasp. He felt that he, Dobbin, was more or less the cause of all that +had happened. It was he had brought back George to Amelia: it was he +had applauded, encouraged, transacted almost the marriage which he was +come to reveal to George's father: and the latter was receiving him +with smiles of welcome; patting him on the shoulder, and calling him +"Dobbin, my dear boy." The envoy had indeed good reason to hang his +head. + +Osborne fully believed that Dobbin had come to announce his son's +surrender. Mr. Chopper and his principal were talking over the matter +between George and his father, at the very moment when Dobbin's +messenger arrived. Both agreed that George was sending in his +submission. Both had been expecting it for some days--and "Lord! +Chopper, what a marriage we'll have!" Mr. Osborne said to his clerk, +snapping his big fingers, and jingling all the guineas and shillings in +his great pockets as he eyed his subordinate with a look of triumph. + +With similar operations conducted in both pockets, and a knowing jolly +air, Osborne from his chair regarded Dobbin seated blank and silent +opposite to him. "What a bumpkin he is for a Captain in the army," old +Osborne thought. "I wonder George hasn't taught him better manners." + +At last Dobbin summoned courage to begin. "Sir," said he, "I've +brought you some very grave news. I have been at the Horse Guards this +morning, and there's no doubt that our regiment will be ordered abroad, +and on its way to Belgium before the week is over. And you know, sir, +that we shan't be home again before a tussle which may be fatal to many +of us." Osborne looked grave. "My s--, the regiment will do its +duty, sir, I daresay," he said. + +"The French are very strong, sir," Dobbin went on. "The Russians and +Austrians will be a long time before they can bring their troops down. +We shall have the first of the fight, sir; and depend on it Boney will +take care that it shall be a hard one." + +"What are you driving at, Dobbin?" his interlocutor said, uneasy and +with a scowl. "I suppose no Briton's afraid of any d---- Frenchman, +hey?" + +"I only mean, that before we go, and considering the great and certain +risk that hangs over every one of us--if there are any differences +between you and George--it would be as well, sir, that--that you +should shake hands: wouldn't it? Should anything happen to him, I +think you would never forgive yourself if you hadn't parted in charity." + +As he said this, poor William Dobbin blushed crimson, and felt and +owned that he himself was a traitor. But for him, perhaps, this +severance need never have taken place. Why had not George's marriage +been delayed? What call was there to press it on so eagerly? He felt +that George would have parted from Amelia at any rate without a mortal +pang. Amelia, too, MIGHT have recovered the shock of losing him. It +was his counsel had brought about this marriage, and all that was to +ensue from it. And why was it? Because he loved her so much that he +could not bear to see her unhappy: or because his own sufferings of +suspense were so unendurable that he was glad to crush them at once--as +we hasten a funeral after a death, or, when a separation from those we +love is imminent, cannot rest until the parting be over. + +"You are a good fellow, William," said Mr. Osborne in a softened voice; +"and me and George shouldn't part in anger, that is true. Look here. +I've done for him as much as any father ever did. He's had three times +as much money from me, as I warrant your father ever gave you. But I +don't brag about that. How I've toiled for him, and worked and +employed my talents and energy, I won't say. Ask Chopper. Ask +himself. Ask the City of London. Well, I propose to him such a +marriage as any nobleman in the land might be proud of--the only thing +in life I ever asked him--and he refuses me. Am I wrong? Is the +quarrel of MY making? What do I seek but his good, for which I've been +toiling like a convict ever since he was born? Nobody can say there's +anything selfish in me. Let him come back. I say, here's my hand. I +say, forget and forgive. As for marrying now, it's out of the +question. Let him and Miss S. make it up, and make out the marriage +afterwards, when he comes back a Colonel; for he shall be a Colonel, by +G-- he shall, if money can do it. I'm glad you've brought him round. +I know it's you, Dobbin. You've took him out of many a scrape before. +Let him come. I shan't be hard. Come along, and dine in Russell +Square to-day: both of you. The old shop, the old hour. You'll find a +neck of venison, and no questions asked." + +This praise and confidence smote Dobbin's heart very keenly. Every +moment the colloquy continued in this tone, he felt more and more +guilty. "Sir," said he, "I fear you deceive yourself. I am sure you +do. George is much too high-minded a man ever to marry for money. A +threat on your part that you would disinherit him in case of +disobedience would only be followed by resistance on his." + +"Why, hang it, man, you don't call offering him eight or ten thousand a +year threatening him?" Mr. Osborne said, with still provoking good +humour. "'Gad, if Miss S. will have me, I'm her man. I ain't +particular about a shade or so of tawny." And the old gentleman gave +his knowing grin and coarse laugh. + +"You forget, sir, previous engagements into which Captain Osborne had +entered," the ambassador said, gravely. + +"What engagements? What the devil do you mean? You don't mean," Mr. +Osborne continued, gathering wrath and astonishment as the thought now +first came upon him; "you don't mean that he's such a d---- fool as to +be still hankering after that swindling old bankrupt's daughter? You've +not come here for to make me suppose that he wants to marry HER? Marry +HER, that IS a good one. My son and heir marry a beggar's girl out of +a gutter. D---- him, if he does, let him buy a broom and sweep a +crossing. She was always dangling and ogling after him, I recollect +now; and I've no doubt she was put on by her old sharper of a father." + +"Mr. Sedley was your very good friend, sir," Dobbin interposed, almost +pleased at finding himself growing angry. "Time was you called him +better names than rogue and swindler. The match was of your making. +George had no right to play fast and loose--" + +"Fast and loose!" howled out old Osborne. "Fast and loose! Why, hang +me, those are the very words my gentleman used himself when he gave +himself airs, last Thursday was a fortnight, and talked about the +British army to his father who made him. What, it's you who have been +a setting of him up--is it? and my service to you, CAPTAIN. It's you +who want to introduce beggars into my family. Thank you for nothing, +Captain. Marry HER indeed--he, he! why should he? I warrant you she'd +go to him fast enough without." + +"Sir," said Dobbin, starting up in undisguised anger; "no man shall +abuse that lady in my hearing, and you least of all." + +"O, you're a-going to call me out, are you? Stop, let me ring the bell +for pistols for two. Mr. George sent you here to insult his father, +did he?" Osborne said, pulling at the bell-cord. + +"Mr. Osborne," said Dobbin, with a faltering voice, "it's you who are +insulting the best creature in the world. You had best spare her, sir, +for she's your son's wife." + +And with this, feeling that he could say no more, Dobbin went away, +Osborne sinking back in his chair, and looking wildly after him. A +clerk came in, obedient to the bell; and the Captain was scarcely out +of the court where Mr. Osborne's offices were, when Mr. Chopper the +chief clerk came rushing hatless after him. + +"For God's sake, what is it?" Mr. Chopper said, catching the Captain by +the skirt. "The governor's in a fit. What has Mr. George been doing?" + +"He married Miss Sedley five days ago," Dobbin replied. "I was his +groomsman, Mr. Chopper, and you must stand his friend." + +The old clerk shook his head. "If that's your news, Captain, it's bad. +The governor will never forgive him." + +Dobbin begged Chopper to report progress to him at the hotel where he +was stopping, and walked off moodily westwards, greatly perturbed as to +the past and the future. + +When the Russell Square family came to dinner that evening, they found +the father of the house seated in his usual place, but with that air of +gloom on his face, which, whenever it appeared there, kept the whole +circle silent. The ladies, and Mr. Bullock who dined with them, felt +that the news had been communicated to Mr. Osborne. His dark looks +affected Mr. Bullock so far as to render him still and quiet: but he +was unusually bland and attentive to Miss Maria, by whom he sat, and to +her sister presiding at the head of the table. + +Miss Wirt, by consequence, was alone on her side of the board, a gap +being left between her and Miss Jane Osborne. Now this was George's +place when he dined at home; and his cover, as we said, was laid for +him in expectation of that truant's return. Nothing occurred during +dinner-time except smiling Mr. Frederick's flagging confidential +whispers, and the clinking of plate and china, to interrupt the silence +of the repast. The servants went about stealthily doing their duty. +Mutes at funerals could not look more glum than the domestics of Mr. +Osborne The neck of venison of which he had invited Dobbin to partake, +was carved by him in perfect silence; but his own share went away +almost untasted, though he drank much, and the butler assiduously +filled his glass. + +At last, just at the end of the dinner, his eyes, which had been +staring at everybody in turn, fixed themselves for a while upon the +plate laid for George. He pointed to it presently with his left hand. +His daughters looked at him and did not comprehend, or choose to +comprehend, the signal; nor did the servants at first understand it. + +"Take that plate away," at last he said, getting up with an oath--and +with this pushing his chair back, he walked into his own room. + +Behind Mr. Osborne's dining-room was the usual apartment which went in +his house by the name of the study; and was sacred to the master of the +house. Hither Mr. Osborne would retire of a Sunday forenoon when not +minded to go to church; and here pass the morning in his crimson +leather chair, reading the paper. A couple of glazed book-cases were +here, containing standard works in stout gilt bindings. The "Annual +Register," the "Gentleman's Magazine," "Blair's Sermons," and "Hume and +Smollett." From year's end to year's end he never took one of these +volumes from the shelf; but there was no member of the family that +would dare for his life to touch one of the books, except upon those +rare Sunday evenings when there was no dinner-party, and when the great +scarlet Bible and Prayer-book were taken out from the corner where they +stood beside his copy of the Peerage, and the servants being rung up to +the dining parlour, Osborne read the evening service to his family in a +loud grating pompous voice. No member of the household, child, or +domestic, ever entered that room without a certain terror. Here he +checked the housekeeper's accounts, and overhauled the butler's +cellar-book. Hence he could command, across the clean gravel +court-yard, the back entrance of the stables with which one of his +bells communicated, and into this yard the coachman issued from his +premises as into a dock, and Osborne swore at him from the study +window. Four times a year Miss Wirt entered this apartment to get her +salary; and his daughters to receive their quarterly allowance. George +as a boy had been horsewhipped in this room many times; his mother +sitting sick on the stair listening to the cuts of the whip. The boy +was scarcely ever known to cry under the punishment; the poor woman +used to fondle and kiss him secretly, and give him money to soothe him +when he came out. + +There was a picture of the family over the mantelpiece, removed thither +from the front room after Mrs. Osborne's death--George was on a pony, +the elder sister holding him up a bunch of flowers; the younger led by +her mother's hand; all with red cheeks and large red mouths, simpering +on each other in the approved family-portrait manner. The mother lay +underground now, long since forgotten--the sisters and brother had a +hundred different interests of their own, and, familiar still, were +utterly estranged from each other. Some few score of years afterwards, +when all the parties represented are grown old, what bitter satire +there is in those flaunting childish family-portraits, with their farce +of sentiment and smiling lies, and innocence so self-conscious and +self-satisfied. Osborne's own state portrait, with that of his great +silver inkstand and arm-chair, had taken the place of honour in the +dining-room, vacated by the family-piece. + +To this study old Osborne retired then, greatly to the relief of the +small party whom he left. When the servants had withdrawn, they began +to talk for a while volubly but very low; then they went upstairs +quietly, Mr. Bullock accompanying them stealthily on his creaking +shoes. He had no heart to sit alone drinking wine, and so close to the +terrible old gentleman in the study hard at hand. + +An hour at least after dark, the butler, not having received any +summons, ventured to tap at his door and take him in wax candles and +tea. The master of the house sate in his chair, pretending to read the +paper, and when the servant, placing the lights and refreshment on the +table by him, retired, Mr. Osborne got up and locked the door after +him. This time there was no mistaking the matter; all the household +knew that some great catastrophe was going to happen which was likely +direly to affect Master George. + +In the large shining mahogany escritoire Mr. Osborne had a drawer +especially devoted to his son's affairs and papers. Here he kept all +the documents relating to him ever since he had been a boy: here were +his prize copy-books and drawing-books, all bearing George's hand, and +that of the master: here were his first letters in large round-hand +sending his love to papa and mamma, and conveying his petitions for a +cake. His dear godpapa Sedley was more than once mentioned in them. +Curses quivered on old Osborne's livid lips, and horrid hatred and +disappointment writhed in his heart, as looking through some of these +papers he came on that name. They were all marked and docketed, and +tied with red tape. It was--"From Georgy, requesting 5s., April 23, +18--; answered, April 25"--or "Georgy about a pony, October 13"--and so +forth. In another packet were "Dr. S.'s accounts"--"G.'s tailor's bills +and outfits, drafts on me by G. Osborne, jun.," &c.--his letters from +the West Indies--his agent's letters, and the newspapers containing his +commissions: here was a whip he had when a boy, and in a paper a locket +containing his hair, which his mother used to wear. + +Turning one over after another, and musing over these memorials, the +unhappy man passed many hours. His dearest vanities, ambitious hopes, +had all been here. What pride he had in his boy! He was the +handsomest child ever seen. Everybody said he was like a nobleman's +son. A royal princess had remarked him, and kissed him, and asked his +name in Kew Gardens. What City man could show such another? Could a +prince have been better cared for? Anything that money could buy had +been his son's. He used to go down on speech-days with four horses and +new liveries, and scatter new shillings among the boys at the school +where George was: when he went with George to the depot of his +regiment, before the boy embarked for Canada, he gave the officers such +a dinner as the Duke of York might have sat down to. Had he ever +refused a bill when George drew one? There they were--paid without a +word. Many a general in the army couldn't ride the horses he had! He +had the child before his eyes, on a hundred different days when he +remembered George after dinner, when he used to come in as bold as a +lord and drink off his glass by his father's side, at the head of the +table--on the pony at Brighton, when he cleared the hedge and kept up +with the huntsman--on the day when he was presented to the Prince +Regent at the levee, when all Saint James's couldn't produce a finer +young fellow. And this, this was the end of all!--to marry a bankrupt +and fly in the face of duty and fortune! What humiliation and fury: +what pangs of sickening rage, balked ambition and love; what wounds of +outraged vanity, tenderness even, had this old worldling now to suffer +under! + +Having examined these papers, and pondered over this one and the other, +in that bitterest of all helpless woe, with which miserable men think +of happy past times--George's father took the whole of the documents +out of the drawer in which he had kept them so long, and locked them +into a writing-box, which he tied, and sealed with his seal. Then he +opened the book-case, and took down the great red Bible we have spoken +of a pompous book, seldom looked at, and shining all over with gold. +There was a frontispiece to the volume, representing Abraham +sacrificing Isaac. Here, according to custom, Osborne had recorded on +the fly-leaf, and in his large clerk-like hand, the dates of his +marriage and his wife's death, and the births and Christian names of +his children. Jane came first, then George Sedley Osborne, then Maria +Frances, and the days of the christening of each. Taking a pen, he +carefully obliterated George's names from the page; and when the leaf +was quite dry, restored the volume to the place from which he had moved +it. Then he took a document out of another drawer, where his own +private papers were kept; and having read it, crumpled it up and +lighted it at one of the candles, and saw it burn entirely away in the +grate. It was his will; which being burned, he sate down and wrote off +a letter, and rang for his servant, whom he charged to deliver it in +the morning. It was morning already: as he went up to bed, the whole +house was alight with the sunshine; and the birds were singing among +the fresh green leaves in Russell Square. + +Anxious to keep all Mr. Osborne's family and dependants in good humour, +and to make as many friends as possible for George in his hour of +adversity, William Dobbin, who knew the effect which good dinners and +good wines have upon the soul of man, wrote off immediately on his +return to his inn the most hospitable of invitations to Thomas Chopper, +Esquire, begging that gentleman to dine with him at the Slaughters' +next day. The note reached Mr. Chopper before he left the City, and +the instant reply was, that "Mr. Chopper presents his respectful +compliments, and will have the honour and pleasure of waiting on +Captain D." The invitation and the rough draft of the answer were +shown to Mrs. Chopper and her daughters on his return to Somers' Town +that evening, and they talked about military gents and West End men +with great exultation as the family sate and partook of tea. When the +girls had gone to rest, Mr. and Mrs. C. discoursed upon the strange +events which were occurring in the governor's family. Never had the +clerk seen his principal so moved. When he went in to Mr. Osborne, +after Captain Dobbin's departure, Mr. Chopper found his chief black in +the face, and all but in a fit: some dreadful quarrel, he was certain, +had occurred between Mr. O. and the young Captain. Chopper had been +instructed to make out an account of all sums paid to Captain Osborne +within the last three years. "And a precious lot of money he has had +too," the chief clerk said, and respected his old and young master the +more, for the liberal way in which the guineas had been flung about. +The dispute was something about Miss Sedley. Mrs. Chopper vowed and +declared she pitied that poor young lady to lose such a handsome young +fellow as the Capting. As the daughter of an unlucky speculator, who +had paid a very shabby dividend, Mr. Chopper had no great regard for +Miss Sedley. He respected the house of Osborne before all others in +the City of London: and his hope and wish was that Captain George +should marry a nobleman's daughter. The clerk slept a great deal +sounder than his principal that night; and, cuddling his children after +breakfast (of which he partook with a very hearty appetite, though his +modest cup of life was only sweetened with brown sugar), he set off in +his best Sunday suit and frilled shirt for business, promising his +admiring wife not to punish Captain D.'s port too severely that evening. + +Mr. Osborne's countenance, when he arrived in the City at his usual +time, struck those dependants who were accustomed, for good reasons, to +watch its expression, as peculiarly ghastly and worn. At twelve +o'clock Mr. Higgs (of the firm of Higgs & Blatherwick, solicitors, +Bedford Row) called by appointment, and was ushered into the governor's +private room, and closeted there for more than an hour. At about one +Mr. Chopper received a note brought by Captain Dobbin's man, and +containing an inclosure for Mr. Osborne, which the clerk went in and +delivered. A short time afterwards Mr. Chopper and Mr. Birch, the next +clerk, were summoned, and requested to witness a paper. "I've been +making a new will," Mr. Osborne said, to which these gentlemen appended +their names accordingly. No conversation passed. Mr. Higgs looked +exceedingly grave as he came into the outer rooms, and very hard in Mr. +Chopper's face; but there were not any explanations. It was remarked +that Mr. Osborne was particularly quiet and gentle all day, to the +surprise of those who had augured ill from his darkling demeanour. He +called no man names that day, and was not heard to swear once. He left +business early; and before going away, summoned his chief clerk once +more, and having given him general instructions, asked him, after some +seeming hesitation and reluctance to speak, if he knew whether Captain +Dobbin was in town? + +Chopper said he believed he was. Indeed both of them knew the fact +perfectly. + +Osborne took a letter directed to that officer, and giving it to the +clerk, requested the latter to deliver it into Dobbin's own hands +immediately. + +"And now, Chopper," says he, taking his hat, and with a strange look, +"my mind will be easy." Exactly as the clock struck two (there was no +doubt an appointment between the pair) Mr. Frederick Bullock called, +and he and Mr. Osborne walked away together. + +The Colonel of the --th regiment, in which Messieurs Dobbin and Osborne +had companies, was an old General who had made his first campaign under +Wolfe at Quebec, and was long since quite too old and feeble for +command; but he took some interest in the regiment of which he was the +nominal head, and made certain of his young officers welcome at his +table, a kind of hospitality which I believe is not now common amongst +his brethren. Captain Dobbin was an especial favourite of this old +General. Dobbin was versed in the literature of his profession, and +could talk about the great Frederick, and the Empress Queen, and their +wars, almost as well as the General himself, who was indifferent to the +triumphs of the present day, and whose heart was with the tacticians of +fifty years back. This officer sent a summons to Dobbin to come and +breakfast with him, on the morning when Mr. Osborne altered his will +and Mr. Chopper put on his best shirt frill, and then informed his +young favourite, a couple of days in advance, of that which they were +all expecting--a marching order to go to Belgium. The order for the +regiment to hold itself in readiness would leave the Horse Guards in a +day or two; and as transports were in plenty, they would get their +route before the week was over. Recruits had come in during the stay +of the regiment at Chatham; and the old General hoped that the regiment +which had helped to beat Montcalm in Canada, and to rout Mr. Washington +on Long Island, would prove itself worthy of its historical reputation +on the oft-trodden battle-grounds of the Low Countries. "And so, my +good friend, if you have any affaire la," said the old General, taking a +pinch of snuff with his trembling white old hand, and then pointing to +the spot of his robe de chambre under which his heart was still feebly +beating, "if you have any Phillis to console, or to bid farewell to +papa and mamma, or any will to make, I recommend you to set about your +business without delay." With which the General gave his young friend a +finger to shake, and a good-natured nod of his powdered and pigtailed +head; and the door being closed upon Dobbin, sate down to pen a poulet +(he was exceedingly vain of his French) to Mademoiselle Amenaide of His +Majesty's Theatre. + +This news made Dobbin grave, and he thought of our friends at Brighton, +and then he was ashamed of himself that Amelia was always the first +thing in his thoughts (always before anybody--before father and mother, +sisters and duty--always at waking and sleeping indeed, and all day +long); and returning to his hotel, he sent off a brief note to Mr. +Osborne acquainting him with the information which he had received, and +which might tend farther, he hoped, to bring about a reconciliation +with George. + +This note, despatched by the same messenger who had carried the +invitation to Chopper on the previous day, alarmed the worthy clerk not +a little. It was inclosed to him, and as he opened the letter he +trembled lest the dinner should be put off on which he was calculating. +His mind was inexpressibly relieved when he found that the envelope was +only a reminder for himself. ("I shall expect you at half-past five," +Captain Dobbin wrote.) He was very much interested about his employer's +family; but, que voulez-vous? a grand dinner was of more concern to him +than the affairs of any other mortal. + +Dobbin was quite justified in repeating the General's information to +any officers of the regiment whom he should see in the course of his +peregrinations; accordingly he imparted it to Ensign Stubble, whom he +met at the agent's, and who--such was his military ardour--went off +instantly to purchase a new sword at the accoutrement-maker's. Here +this young fellow, who, though only seventeen years of age, and about +sixty-five inches high, with a constitution naturally rickety and much +impaired by premature brandy and water, had an undoubted courage and a +lion's heart, poised, tried, bent, and balanced a weapon such as he +thought would do execution amongst Frenchmen. Shouting "Ha, ha!" and +stamping his little feet with tremendous energy, he delivered the point +twice or thrice at Captain Dobbin, who parried the thrust laughingly +with his bamboo walking-stick. + +Mr. Stubble, as may be supposed from his size and slenderness, was of +the Light Bobs. Ensign Spooney, on the contrary, was a tall youth, and +belonged to (Captain Dobbin's) the Grenadier Company, and he tried on a +new bearskin cap, under which he looked savage beyond his years. Then +these two lads went off to the Slaughters', and having ordered a famous +dinner, sate down and wrote off letters to the kind anxious parents at +home--letters full of love and heartiness, and pluck and bad spelling. +Ah! there were many anxious hearts beating through England at that +time; and mothers' prayers and tears flowing in many homesteads. + +Seeing young Stubble engaged in composition at one of the coffee-room +tables at the Slaughters', and the tears trickling down his nose on to +the paper (for the youngster was thinking of his mamma, and that he +might never see her again), Dobbin, who was going to write off a letter +to George Osborne, relented, and locked up his desk. "Why should I?" +said he. "Let her have this night happy. I'll go and see my parents +early in the morning, and go down to Brighton myself to-morrow." + +So he went up and laid his big hand on young Stubble's shoulder, and +backed up that young champion, and told him if he would leave off +brandy and water he would be a good soldier, as he always was a +gentlemanly good-hearted fellow. Young Stubble's eyes brightened up at +this, for Dobbin was greatly respected in the regiment, as the best +officer and the cleverest man in it. + +"Thank you, Dobbin," he said, rubbing his eyes with his knuckles, "I +was just--just telling her I would. And, O Sir, she's so dam kind to +me." The water pumps were at work again, and I am not sure that the +soft-hearted Captain's eyes did not also twinkle. + +The two ensigns, the Captain, and Mr. Chopper, dined together in the +same box. Chopper brought the letter from Mr. Osborne, in which the +latter briefly presented his compliments to Captain Dobbin, and +requested him to forward the inclosed to Captain George Osborne. +Chopper knew nothing further; he described Mr. Osborne's appearance, it +is true, and his interview with his lawyer, wondered how the governor +had sworn at nobody, and--especially as the wine circled +round--abounded in speculations and conjectures. But these grew more +vague with every glass, and at length became perfectly unintelligible. +At a late hour Captain Dobbin put his guest into a hackney coach, in a +hiccupping state, and swearing that he would be the kick--the +kick--Captain's friend for ever and ever. + +When Captain Dobbin took leave of Miss Osborne we have said that he +asked leave to come and pay her another visit, and the spinster +expected him for some hours the next day, when, perhaps, had he come, +and had he asked her that question which she was prepared to answer, +she would have declared herself as her brother's friend, and a +reconciliation might have been effected between George and his angry +father. But though she waited at home the Captain never came. He had +his own affairs to pursue; his own parents to visit and console; and at +an early hour of the day to take his place on the Lightning coach, and +go down to his friends at Brighton. In the course of the day Miss +Osborne heard her father give orders that that meddling scoundrel, +Captain Dobbin, should never be admitted within his doors again, and +any hopes in which she may have indulged privately were thus abruptly +brought to an end. Mr. Frederick Bullock came, and was particularly +affectionate to Maria, and attentive to the broken-spirited old +gentleman. For though he said his mind would be easy, the means which +he had taken to secure quiet did not seem to have succeeded as yet, and +the events of the past two days had visibly shattered him. + + + +CHAPTER XXV + +In Which All the Principal Personages Think Fit to Leave Brighton + +Conducted to the ladies, at the Ship Inn, Dobbin assumed a jovial and +rattling manner, which proved that this young officer was becoming a +more consummate hypocrite every day of his life. He was trying to hide +his own private feelings, first upon seeing Mrs. George Osborne in her +new condition, and secondly to mask the apprehensions he entertained as +to the effect which the dismal news brought down by him would certainly +have upon her. + +"It is my opinion, George," he said, "that the French Emperor will be +upon us, horse and foot, before three weeks are over, and will give the +Duke such a dance as shall make the Peninsula appear mere child's play. +But you need not say that to Mrs. Osborne, you know. There mayn't be +any fighting on our side after all, and our business in Belgium may +turn out to be a mere military occupation. Many persons think so; and +Brussels is full of fine people and ladies of fashion." So it was +agreed to represent the duty of the British army in Belgium in this +harmless light to Amelia. + +This plot being arranged, the hypocritical Dobbin saluted Mrs. George +Osborne quite gaily, tried to pay her one or two compliments relative +to her new position as a bride (which compliments, it must be +confessed, were exceedingly clumsy and hung fire woefully), and then +fell to talking about Brighton, and the sea-air, and the gaieties of +the place, and the beauties of the road and the merits of the Lightning +coach and horses--all in a manner quite incomprehensible to Amelia, and +very amusing to Rebecca, who was watching the Captain, as indeed she +watched every one near whom she came. + +Little Amelia, it must be owned, had rather a mean opinion of her +husband's friend, Captain Dobbin. He lisped--he was very plain and +homely-looking: and exceedingly awkward and ungainly. She liked him +for his attachment to her husband (to be sure there was very little +merit in that), and she thought George was most generous and kind in +extending his friendship to his brother officer. George had mimicked +Dobbin's lisp and queer manners many times to her, though to do him +justice, he always spoke most highly of his friend's good qualities. In +her little day of triumph, and not knowing him intimately as yet, she +made light of honest William--and he knew her opinions of him quite +well, and acquiesced in them very humbly. A time came when she knew +him better, and changed her notions regarding him; but that was distant +as yet. + +As for Rebecca, Captain Dobbin had not been two hours in the ladies' +company before she understood his secret perfectly. She did not like +him, and feared him privately; nor was he very much prepossessed in her +favour. He was so honest, that her arts and cajoleries did not affect +him, and he shrank from her with instinctive repulsion. And, as she was +by no means so far superior to her sex as to be above jealousy, she +disliked him the more for his adoration of Amelia. Nevertheless, she +was very respectful and cordial in her manner towards him. A friend to +the Osbornes! a friend to her dearest benefactors! She vowed she +should always love him sincerely: she remembered him quite well on the +Vauxhall night, as she told Amelia archly, and she made a little fun of +him when the two ladies went to dress for dinner. Rawdon Crawley paid +scarcely any attention to Dobbin, looking upon him as a good-natured +nincompoop and under-bred City man. Jos patronised him with much +dignity. + +When George and Dobbin were alone in the latter's room, to which George +had followed him, Dobbin took from his desk the letter which he had +been charged by Mr. Osborne to deliver to his son. "It's not in my +father's handwriting," said George, looking rather alarmed; nor was it: +the letter was from Mr. Osborne's lawyer, and to the following effect: + + "Bedford Row, May 7, 1815. + +"SIR, + +"I am commissioned by Mr. Osborne to inform you, that he abides by the +determination which he before expressed to you, and that in consequence +of the marriage which you have been pleased to contract, he ceases to +consider you henceforth as a member of his family. This determination +is final and irrevocable. + +"Although the monies expended upon you in your minority, and the bills +which you have drawn upon him so unsparingly of late years, far exceed +in amount the sum to which you are entitled in your own right (being +the third part of the fortune of your mother, the late Mrs. Osborne and +which reverted to you at her decease, and to Miss Jane Osborne and Miss +Maria Frances Osborne); yet I am instructed by Mr. Osborne to say, that +he waives all claim upon your estate, and that the sum of 2,000 pounds, +4 per cent. annuities, at the value of the day (being your one-third +share of the sum of 6,000 pounds), shall be paid over to yourself or +your agents upon your receipt for the same, by + + "Your obedient Servt., + "S. HIGGS. + +"P.S.--Mr. Osborne desires me to say, once for all, that he declines to +receive any messages, letters, or communications from you on this or +any other subject. + +"A pretty way you have managed the affair," said George, looking +savagely at William Dobbin. "Look there, Dobbin," and he flung over to +the latter his parent's letter. "A beggar, by Jove, and all in +consequence of my d--d sentimentality. Why couldn't we have waited? A +ball might have done for me in the course of the war, and may still, +and how will Emmy be bettered by being left a beggar's widow? It was +all your doing. You were never easy until you had got me married and +ruined. What the deuce am I to do with two thousand pounds? Such a +sum won't last two years. I've lost a hundred and forty to Crawley at +cards and billiards since I've been down here. A pretty manager of a +man's matters YOU are, forsooth." + +"There's no denying that the position is a hard one," Dobbin replied, +after reading over the letter with a blank countenance; "and as you +say, it is partly of my making. There are some men who wouldn't mind +changing with you," he added, with a bitter smile. "How many captains +in the regiment have two thousand pounds to the fore, think you? You +must live on your pay till your father relents, and if you die, you +leave your wife a hundred a year." + +"Do you suppose a man of my habits can live on his pay and a hundred a +year?" George cried out in great anger. "You must be a fool to talk +so, Dobbin. How the deuce am I to keep up my position in the world +upon such a pitiful pittance? I can't change my habits. I must have +my comforts. I wasn't brought up on porridge, like MacWhirter, or on +potatoes, like old O'Dowd. Do you expect my wife to take in soldiers' +washing, or ride after the regiment in a baggage waggon?" + +"Well, well," said Dobbin, still good-naturedly, "we'll get her a +better conveyance. But try and remember that you are only a dethroned +prince now, George, my boy; and be quiet whilst the tempest lasts. It +won't be for long. Let your name be mentioned in the Gazette, and I'll +engage the old father relents towards you:" + +"Mentioned in the Gazette!" George answered. "And in what part of it? +Among the killed and wounded returns, and at the top of the list, very +likely." + +"Psha! It will be time enough to cry out when we are hurt," Dobbin +said. "And if anything happens, you know, George, I have got a little, +and I am not a marrying man, and I shall not forget my godson in my +will," he added, with a smile. Whereupon the dispute ended--as many +scores of such conversations between Osborne and his friend had +concluded previously--by the former declaring there was no possibility +of being angry with Dobbin long, and forgiving him very generously +after abusing him without cause. + +"I say, Becky," cried Rawdon Crawley out of his dressing-room, to his +lady, who was attiring herself for dinner in her own chamber. + +"What?" said Becky's shrill voice. She was looking over her shoulder +in the glass. She had put on the neatest and freshest white frock +imaginable, and with bare shoulders and a little necklace, and a light +blue sash, she looked the image of youthful innocence and girlish +happiness. + +"I say, what'll Mrs. O. do, when O. goes out with the regiment?" +Crawley said coming into the room, performing a duet on his head with +two huge hair-brushes, and looking out from under his hair with +admiration on his pretty little wife. + +"I suppose she'll cry her eyes out," Becky answered. "She has been +whimpering half a dozen times, at the very notion of it, already to me." + +"YOU don't care, I suppose?" Rawdon said, half angry at his wife's want +of feeling. + +"You wretch! don't you know that I intend to go with you," Becky +replied. "Besides, you're different. You go as General Tufto's +aide-de-camp. We don't belong to the line," Mrs. Crawley said, +throwing up her head with an air that so enchanted her husband that he +stooped down and kissed it. + +"Rawdon dear--don't you think--you'd better get that--money from Cupid, +before he goes?" Becky continued, fixing on a killing bow. She called +George Osborne, Cupid. She had flattered him about his good looks a +score of times already. She watched over him kindly at ecarte of a +night when he would drop in to Rawdon's quarters for a half-hour before +bed-time. + +She had often called him a horrid dissipated wretch, and threatened to +tell Emmy of his wicked ways and naughty extravagant habits. She +brought his cigar and lighted it for him; she knew the effect of that +manoeuvre, having practised it in former days upon Rawdon Crawley. He +thought her gay, brisk, arch, distinguee, delightful. In their little +drives and dinners, Becky, of course, quite outshone poor Emmy, who +remained very mute and timid while Mrs. Crawley and her husband rattled +away together, and Captain Crawley (and Jos after he joined the young +married people) gobbled in silence. + +Emmy's mind somehow misgave her about her friend. Rebecca's wit, +spirits, and accomplishments troubled her with a rueful disquiet. They +were only a week married, and here was George already suffering ennui, +and eager for others' society! She trembled for the future. How shall +I be a companion for him, she thought--so clever and so brilliant, and +I such a humble foolish creature? How noble it was of him to marry +me--to give up everything and stoop down to me! I ought to have +refused him, only I had not the heart. I ought to have stopped at home +and taken care of poor Papa. And her neglect of her parents (and +indeed there was some foundation for this charge which the poor child's +uneasy conscience brought against her) was now remembered for the first +time, and caused her to blush with humiliation. Oh! thought she, I +have been very wicked and selfish--selfish in forgetting them in their +sorrows--selfish in forcing George to marry me. I know I'm not worthy +of him--I know he would have been happy without me--and yet--I tried, I +tried to give him up. + +It is hard when, before seven days of marriage are over, such thoughts +and confessions as these force themselves on a little bride's mind. +But so it was, and the night before Dobbin came to join these young +people--on a fine brilliant moonlight night of May--so warm and balmy +that the windows were flung open to the balcony, from which George and +Mrs. Crawley were gazing upon the calm ocean spread shining before +them, while Rawdon and Jos were engaged at backgammon within--Amelia +couched in a great chair quite neglected, and watching both these +parties, felt a despair and remorse such as were bitter companions for +that tender lonely soul. Scarce a week was past, and it was come to +this! The future, had she regarded it, offered a dismal prospect; but +Emmy was too shy, so to speak, to look to that, and embark alone on +that wide sea, and unfit to navigate it without a guide and protector. +I know Miss Smith has a mean opinion of her. But how many, my dear +Madam, are endowed with your prodigious strength of mind? + +"Gad, what a fine night, and how bright the moon is!" George said, with +a puff of his cigar, which went soaring up skywards. + +"How delicious they smell in the open air! I adore them. Who'd think +the moon was two hundred and thirty-six thousand eight hundred and +forty-seven miles off?" Becky added, gazing at that orb with a smile. +"Isn't it clever of me to remember that? Pooh! we learned it all at +Miss Pinkerton's! How calm the sea is, and how clear everything. I +declare I can almost see the coast of France!" and her bright green +eyes streamed out, and shot into the night as if they could see through +it. + +"Do you know what I intend to do one morning?" she said; "I find I can +swim beautifully, and some day, when my Aunt Crawley's companion--old +Briggs, you know--you remember her--that hook-nosed woman, with the +long wisps of hair--when Briggs goes out to bathe, I intend to dive +under her awning, and insist on a reconciliation in the water. Isn't +that a stratagem?" + +George burst out laughing at the idea of this aquatic meeting. "What's +the row there, you two?" Rawdon shouted out, rattling the box. Amelia +was making a fool of herself in an absurd hysterical manner, and +retired to her own room to whimper in private. + +Our history is destined in this chapter to go backwards and forwards in +a very irresolute manner seemingly, and having conducted our story to +to-morrow presently, we shall immediately again have occasion to step +back to yesterday, so that the whole of the tale may get a hearing. As +you behold at her Majesty's drawing-room, the ambassadors' and high +dignitaries' carriages whisk off from a private door, while Captain +Jones's ladies are waiting for their fly: as you see in the Secretary +of the Treasury's antechamber, a half-dozen of petitioners waiting +patiently for their audience, and called out one by one, when suddenly +an Irish member or some eminent personage enters the apartment, and +instantly walks into Mr. Under-Secretary over the heads of all the +people present: so in the conduct of a tale, the romancer is obliged to +exercise this most partial sort of justice. Although all the little +incidents must be heard, yet they must be put off when the great events +make their appearance; and surely such a circumstance as that which +brought Dobbin to Brighton, viz., the ordering out of the Guards and +the line to Belgium, and the mustering of the allied armies in that +country under the command of his Grace the Duke of Wellington--such a +dignified circumstance as that, I say, was entitled to the pas over all +minor occurrences whereof this history is composed mainly, and hence a +little trifling disarrangement and disorder was excusable and becoming. +We have only now advanced in time so far beyond Chapter XXII as to have +got our various characters up into their dressing-rooms before the +dinner, which took place as usual on the day of Dobbin's arrival. + +George was too humane or too much occupied with the tie of his +neckcloth to convey at once all the news to Amelia which his comrade +had brought with him from London. He came into her room, however, +holding the attorney's letter in his hand, and with so solemn and +important an air that his wife, always ingeniously on the watch for +calamity, thought the worst was about to befall, and running up to her +husband, besought her dearest George to tell her everything--he was +ordered abroad; there would be a battle next week--she knew there would. + +Dearest George parried the question about foreign service, and with a +melancholy shake of the head said, "No, Emmy; it isn't that: it's not +myself I care about: it's you. I have had bad news from my father. He +refuses any communication with me; he has flung us off; and leaves us +to poverty. I can rough it well enough; but you, my dear, how will you +bear it? read here." And he handed her over the letter. + +Amelia, with a look of tender alarm in her eyes, listened to her noble +hero as he uttered the above generous sentiments, and sitting down on +the bed, read the letter which George gave her with such a pompous +martyr-like air. Her face cleared up as she read the document, +however. The idea of sharing poverty and privation in company with the +beloved object is, as we have before said, far from being disagreeable +to a warm-hearted woman. The notion was actually pleasant to little +Amelia. Then, as usual, she was ashamed of herself for feeling happy +at such an indecorous moment, and checked her pleasure, saying +demurely, "O, George, how your poor heart must bleed at the idea of +being separated from your papa!" + +"It does," said George, with an agonised countenance. + +"But he can't be angry with you long," she continued. "Nobody could, +I'm sure. He must forgive you, my dearest, kindest husband. O, I +shall never forgive myself if he does not." + +"What vexes me, my poor Emmy, is not my misfortune, but yours," George +said. "I don't care for a little poverty; and I think, without vanity, +I've talents enough to make my own way." + +"That you have," interposed his wife, who thought that war should +cease, and her husband should be made a general instantly. + +"Yes, I shall make my way as well as another," Osborne went on; "but +you, my dear girl, how can I bear your being deprived of the comforts +and station in society which my wife had a right to expect? My dearest +girl in barracks; the wife of a soldier in a marching regiment; subject +to all sorts of annoyance and privation! It makes me miserable." + +Emmy, quite at ease, as this was her husband's only cause of disquiet, +took his hand, and with a radiant face and smile began to warble that +stanza from the favourite song of "Wapping Old Stairs," in which the +heroine, after rebuking her Tom for inattention, promises "his trousers +to mend, and his grog too to make," if he will be constant and kind, +and not forsake her. "Besides," she said, after a pause, during which +she looked as pretty and happy as any young woman need, "isn't two +thousand pounds an immense deal of money, George?" + +George laughed at her naivete; and finally they went down to dinner, +Amelia clinging to George's arm, still warbling the tune of "Wapping +Old Stairs," and more pleased and light of mind than she had been for +some days past. + +Thus the repast, which at length came off, instead of being dismal, was +an exceedingly brisk and merry one. The excitement of the campaign +counteracted in George's mind the depression occasioned by the +disinheriting letter. Dobbin still kept up his character of rattle. He +amused the company with accounts of the army in Belgium; where nothing +but fetes and gaiety and fashion were going on. Then, having a +particular end in view, this dexterous captain proceeded to describe +Mrs. Major O'Dowd packing her own and her Major's wardrobe, and how his +best epaulets had been stowed into a tea canister, whilst her own +famous yellow turban, with the bird of paradise wrapped in brown paper, +was locked up in the Major's tin cocked-hat case, and wondered what +effect it would have at the French king's court at Ghent, or the great +military balls at Brussels. + +"Ghent! Brussels!" cried out Amelia with a sudden shock and start. "Is +the regiment ordered away, George--is it ordered away?" A look of +terror came over the sweet smiling face, and she clung to George as by +an instinct. + +"Don't be afraid, dear," he said good-naturedly; "it is but a twelve +hours' passage. It won't hurt you. You shall go, too, Emmy." + +"I intend to go," said Becky. "I'm on the staff. General Tufto is a +great flirt of mine. Isn't he, Rawdon?" Rawdon laughed out with his +usual roar. William Dobbin flushed up quite red. "She can't go," he +said; "think of the--of the danger," he was going to add; but had not +all his conversation during dinner-time tended to prove there was none? +He became very confused and silent. + +"I must and will go," Amelia cried with the greatest spirit; and +George, applauding her resolution, patted her under the chin, and asked +all the persons present if they ever saw such a termagant of a wife, +and agreed that the lady should bear him company. "We'll have Mrs. +O'Dowd to chaperon you," he said. What cared she so long as her +husband was near her? Thus somehow the bitterness of a parting was +juggled away. Though war and danger were in store, war and danger +might not befall for months to come. There was a respite at any rate, +which made the timid little Amelia almost as happy as a full reprieve +would have done, and which even Dobbin owned in his heart was very +welcome. For, to be permitted to see her was now the greatest +privilege and hope of his life, and he thought with himself secretly +how he would watch and protect her. I wouldn't have let her go if I +had been married to her, he thought. But George was the master, and +his friend did not think fit to remonstrate. + +Putting her arm round her friend's waist, Rebecca at length carried +Amelia off from the dinner-table where so much business of importance +had been discussed, and left the gentlemen in a highly exhilarated +state, drinking and talking very gaily. + +In the course of the evening Rawdon got a little family-note from his +wife, which, although he crumpled it up and burnt it instantly in the +candle, we had the good luck to read over Rebecca's shoulder. "Great +news," she wrote. "Mrs. Bute is gone. Get the money from Cupid +tonight, as he'll be off to-morrow most likely. Mind this.--R." So +when the little company was about adjourning to coffee in the women's +apartment, Rawdon touched Osborne on the elbow, and said gracefully, "I +say, Osborne, my boy, if quite convenient, I'll trouble you for that +'ere small trifle." It was not quite convenient, but nevertheless +George gave him a considerable present instalment in bank-notes from +his pocket-book, and a bill on his agents at a week's date, for the +remaining sum. + +This matter arranged, George, and Jos, and Dobbin, held a council of +war over their cigars, and agreed that a general move should be made +for London in Jos's open carriage the next day. Jos, I think, would +have preferred staying until Rawdon Crawley quitted Brighton, but +Dobbin and George overruled him, and he agreed to carry the party to +town, and ordered four horses, as became his dignity. With these they +set off in state, after breakfast, the next day. Amelia had risen very +early in the morning, and packed her little trunks with the greatest +alacrity, while Osborne lay in bed deploring that she had not a maid to +help her. She was only too glad, however, to perform this office for +herself. A dim uneasy sentiment about Rebecca filled her mind already; +and although they kissed each other most tenderly at parting, yet we +know what jealousy is; and Mrs. Amelia possessed that among other +virtues of her sex. + +Besides these characters who are coming and going away, we must +remember that there were some other old friends of ours at Brighton; +Miss Crawley, namely, and the suite in attendance upon her. Now, +although Rebecca and her husband were but at a few stones' throw of the +lodgings which the invalid Miss Crawley occupied, the old lady's door +remained as pitilessly closed to them as it had been heretofore in +London. As long as she remained by the side of her sister-in-law, +Mrs. Bute Crawley took care that her beloved Matilda should not be +agitated by a meeting with her nephew. When the spinster took her +drive, the faithful Mrs. Bute sate beside her in the carriage. When +Miss Crawley took the air in a chair, Mrs. Bute marched on one side of +the vehicle, whilst honest Briggs occupied the other wing. And if they +met Rawdon and his wife by chance--although the former constantly and +obsequiously took off his hat, the Miss-Crawley party passed him by +with such a frigid and killing indifference, that Rawdon began to +despair. + +"We might as well be in London as here," Captain Rawdon often said, +with a downcast air. + +"A comfortable inn in Brighton is better than a spunging-house in +Chancery Lane," his wife answered, who was of a more cheerful +temperament. "Think of those two aides-de-camp of Mr. Moses, the +sheriff's-officer, who watched our lodging for a week. Our friends +here are very stupid, but Mr. Jos and Captain Cupid are better +companions than Mr. Moses's men, Rawdon, my love." + +"I wonder the writs haven't followed me down here," Rawdon continued, +still desponding. + +"When they do, we'll find means to give them the slip," said dauntless +little Becky, and further pointed out to her husband the great comfort +and advantage of meeting Jos and Osborne, whose acquaintance had +brought to Rawdon Crawley a most timely little supply of ready money. + +"It will hardly be enough to pay the inn bill," grumbled the Guardsman. + +"Why need we pay it?" said the lady, who had an answer for everything. + +Through Rawdon's valet, who still kept up a trifling acquaintance with +the male inhabitants of Miss Crawley's servants' hall, and was +instructed to treat the coachman to drink whenever they met, old Miss +Crawley's movements were pretty well known by our young couple; and +Rebecca luckily bethought herself of being unwell, and of calling in +the same apothecary who was in attendance upon the spinster, so that +their information was on the whole tolerably complete. Nor was Miss +Briggs, although forced to adopt a hostile attitude, secretly inimical +to Rawdon and his wife. She was naturally of a kindly and forgiving +disposition. Now that the cause of jealousy was removed, her dislike +for Rebecca disappeared also, and she remembered the latter's +invariable good words and good humour. And, indeed, she and Mrs. +Firkin, the lady's-maid, and the whole of Miss Crawley's household, +groaned under the tyranny of the triumphant Mrs. Bute. + +As often will be the case, that good but imperious woman pushed her +advantages too far, and her successes quite unmercifully. She had in +the course of a few weeks brought the invalid to such a state of +helpless docility, that the poor soul yielded herself entirely to her +sister's orders, and did not even dare to complain of her slavery to +Briggs or Firkin. Mrs. Bute measured out the glasses of wine which +Miss Crawley was daily allowed to take, with irresistible accuracy, +greatly to the annoyance of Firkin and the butler, who found themselves +deprived of control over even the sherry-bottle. She apportioned the +sweetbreads, jellies, chickens; their quantity and order. Night and +noon and morning she brought the abominable drinks ordained by the +Doctor, and made her patient swallow them with so affecting an +obedience that Firkin said "my poor Missus du take her physic like a +lamb." She prescribed the drive in the carriage or the ride in the +chair, and, in a word, ground down the old lady in her convalescence in +such a way as only belongs to your proper-managing, motherly moral +woman. If ever the patient faintly resisted, and pleaded for a little +bit more dinner or a little drop less medicine, the nurse threatened +her with instantaneous death, when Miss Crawley instantly gave in. +"She's no spirit left in her," Firkin remarked to Briggs; "she ain't +ave called me a fool these three weeks." Finally, Mrs. Bute had made up +her mind to dismiss the aforesaid honest lady's-maid, Mr. Bowls the +large confidential man, and Briggs herself, and to send for her +daughters from the Rectory, previous to removing the dear invalid +bodily to Queen's Crawley, when an odious accident happened which +called her away from duties so pleasing. The Reverend Bute Crawley, +her husband, riding home one night, fell with his horse and broke his +collar-bone. Fever and inflammatory symptoms set in, and Mrs. Bute was +forced to leave Sussex for Hampshire. As soon as ever Bute was +restored, she promised to return to her dearest friend, and departed, +leaving the strongest injunctions with the household regarding their +behaviour to their mistress; and as soon as she got into the +Southampton coach, there was such a jubilee and sense of relief in all +Miss Crawley's house, as the company of persons assembled there had not +experienced for many a week before. That very day Miss Crawley left +off her afternoon dose of medicine: that afternoon Bowls opened an +independent bottle of sherry for himself and Mrs. Firkin: that night +Miss Crawley and Miss Briggs indulged in a game of piquet instead of +one of Porteus's sermons. It was as in the old nursery-story, when +the stick forgot to beat the dog, and the whole course of events +underwent a peaceful and happy revolution. + +At a very early hour in the morning, twice or thrice a week, Miss +Briggs used to betake herself to a bathing-machine, and disport in the +water in a flannel gown and an oilskin cap. Rebecca, as we have seen, +was aware of this circumstance, and though she did not attempt to storm +Briggs as she had threatened, and actually dive into that lady's +presence and surprise her under the sacredness of the awning, Mrs. +Rawdon determined to attack Briggs as she came away from her bath, +refreshed and invigorated by her dip, and likely to be in good humour. + +So getting up very early the next morning, Becky brought the telescope +in their sitting-room, which faced the sea, to bear upon the +bathing-machines on the beach; saw Briggs arrive, enter her box; and +put out to sea; and was on the shore just as the nymph of whom she came +in quest stepped out of the little caravan on to the shingles. It was +a pretty picture: the beach; the bathing-women's faces; the long line +of rocks and building were blushing and bright in the sunshine. +Rebecca wore a kind, tender smile on her face, and was holding out her +pretty white hand as Briggs emerged from the box. What could Briggs do +but accept the salutation? + +"Miss Sh--Mrs. Crawley," she said. + +Mrs. Crawley seized her hand, pressed it to her heart, and with a +sudden impulse, flinging her arms round Briggs, kissed her +affectionately. "Dear, dear friend!" she said, with a touch of such +natural feeling, that Miss Briggs of course at once began to melt, and +even the bathing-woman was mollified. + +Rebecca found no difficulty in engaging Briggs in a long, intimate, and +delightful conversation. Everything that had passed since the morning +of Becky's sudden departure from Miss Crawley's house in Park Lane up +to the present day, and Mrs. Bute's happy retreat, was discussed and +described by Briggs. All Miss Crawley's symptoms, and the particulars +of her illness and medical treatment, were narrated by the confidante +with that fulness and accuracy which women delight in. About their +complaints and their doctors do ladies ever tire of talking to each +other? Briggs did not on this occasion; nor did Rebecca weary of +listening. She was thankful, truly thankful, that the dear kind +Briggs, that the faithful, the invaluable Firkin, had been permitted to +remain with their benefactress through her illness. Heaven bless her! +though she, Rebecca, had seemed to act undutifully towards Miss +Crawley; yet was not her fault a natural and excusable one? Could she +help giving her hand to the man who had won her heart? Briggs, the +sentimental, could only turn up her eyes to heaven at this appeal, and +heave a sympathetic sigh, and think that she, too, had given away her +affections long years ago, and own that Rebecca was no very great +criminal. + +"Can I ever forget her who so befriended the friendless orphan? No, +though she has cast me off," the latter said, "I shall never cease to +love her, and I would devote my life to her service. As my own +benefactress, as my beloved Rawdon's adored relative, I love and admire +Miss Crawley, dear Miss Briggs, beyond any woman in the world, and next +to her I love all those who are faithful to her. I would never have +treated Miss Crawley's faithful friends as that odious designing Mrs. +Bute has done. Rawdon, who was all heart," Rebecca continued, +"although his outward manners might seem rough and careless, had said a +hundred times, with tears in his eyes, that he blessed Heaven for +sending his dearest Aunty two such admirable nurses as her attached +Firkin and her admirable Miss Briggs. Should the machinations of the +horrible Mrs. Bute end, as she too much feared they would, in banishing +everybody that Miss Crawley loved from her side, and leaving that poor +lady a victim to those harpies at the Rectory, Rebecca besought her +(Miss Briggs) to remember that her own home, humble as it was, was +always open to receive Briggs. Dear friend," she exclaimed, in a +transport of enthusiasm, "some hearts can never forget benefits; all +women are not Bute Crawleys! Though why should I complain of her," +Rebecca added; "though I have been her tool and the victim to her arts, +do I not owe my dearest Rawdon to her?" And Rebecca unfolded to Briggs +all Mrs. Bute's conduct at Queen's Crawley, which, though +unintelligible to her then, was clearly enough explained by the events +now--now that the attachment had sprung up which Mrs. Bute had +encouraged by a thousand artifices--now that two innocent people had +fallen into the snares which she had laid for them, and loved and +married and been ruined through her schemes. + +It was all very true. Briggs saw the stratagems as clearly as +possible. Mrs. Bute had made the match between Rawdon and Rebecca. +Yet, though the latter was a perfectly innocent victim, Miss Briggs +could not disguise from her friend her fear that Miss Crawley's +affections were hopelessly estranged from Rebecca, and that the old +lady would never forgive her nephew for making so imprudent a marriage. + +On this point Rebecca had her own opinion, and still kept up a good +heart. If Miss Crawley did not forgive them at present, she might at +least relent on a future day. Even now, there was only that puling, +sickly Pitt Crawley between Rawdon and a baronetcy; and should anything +happen to the former, all would be well. At all events, to have Mrs. +Bute's designs exposed, and herself well abused, was a satisfaction, +and might be advantageous to Rawdon's interest; and Rebecca, after an +hour's chat with her recovered friend, left her with the most tender +demonstrations of regard, and quite assured that the conversation they +had had together would be reported to Miss Crawley before many hours +were over. + +This interview ended, it became full time for Rebecca to return to her +inn, where all the party of the previous day were assembled at a +farewell breakfast. Rebecca took such a tender leave of Amelia as +became two women who loved each other as sisters; and having used her +handkerchief plentifully, and hung on her friend's neck as if they were +parting for ever, and waved the handkerchief (which was quite dry, by +the way) out of window, as the carriage drove off, she came back to the +breakfast table, and ate some prawns with a good deal of appetite, +considering her emotion; and while she was munching these delicacies, +explained to Rawdon what had occurred in her morning walk between +herself and Briggs. Her hopes were very high: she made her husband +share them. She generally succeeded in making her husband share all +her opinions, whether melancholy or cheerful. + +"You will now, if you please, my dear, sit down at the writing-table +and pen me a pretty little letter to Miss Crawley, in which you'll say +that you are a good boy, and that sort of thing." So Rawdon sate down, +and wrote off, "Brighton, Thursday," and "My dear Aunt," with great +rapidity: but there the gallant officer's imagination failed him. He +mumbled the end of his pen, and looked up in his wife's face. She +could not help laughing at his rueful countenance, and marching up and +down the room with her hands behind her, the little woman began to +dictate a letter, which he took down. + +"Before quitting the country and commencing a campaign, which very +possibly may be fatal." + +"What?" said Rawdon, rather surprised, but took the humour of the +phrase, and presently wrote it down with a grin. + +"Which very possibly may be fatal, I have come hither--" + +"Why not say come here, Becky? Come here's grammar," the dragoon +interposed. + +"I have come hither," Rebecca insisted, with a stamp of her foot, "to +say farewell to my dearest and earliest friend. I beseech you before I +go, not perhaps to return, once more to let me press the hand from +which I have received nothing but kindnesses all my life." + +"Kindnesses all my life," echoed Rawdon, scratching down the words, and +quite amazed at his own facility of composition. + +"I ask nothing from you but that we should part not in anger. I have +the pride of my family on some points, though not on all. I married a +painter's daughter, and am not ashamed of the union." + +"No, run me through the body if I am!" Rawdon ejaculated. + +"You old booby," Rebecca said, pinching his ear and looking over to see +that he made no mistakes in spelling--"beseech is not spelt with an a, +and earliest is." So he altered these words, bowing to the superior +knowledge of his little Missis. + +"I thought that you were aware of the progress of my attachment," +Rebecca continued: "I knew that Mrs. Bute Crawley confirmed and +encouraged it. But I make no reproaches. I married a poor woman, and +am content to abide by what I have done. Leave your property, dear +Aunt, as you will. I shall never complain of the way in which you +dispose of it. I would have you believe that I love you for yourself, +and not for money's sake. I want to be reconciled to you ere I leave +England. Let me, let me see you before I go. A few weeks or months +hence it may be too late, and I cannot bear the notion of quitting the +country without a kind word of farewell from you." + +"She won't recognise my style in that," said Becky. "I made the +sentences short and brisk on purpose." And this authentic missive was +despatched under cover to Miss Briggs. + +Old Miss Crawley laughed when Briggs, with great mystery, handed her +over this candid and simple statement. "We may read it now Mrs. Bute +is away," she said. "Read it to me, Briggs." + +When Briggs had read the epistle out, her patroness laughed more. +"Don't you see, you goose," she said to Briggs, who professed to be +much touched by the honest affection which pervaded the composition, +"don't you see that Rawdon never wrote a word of it. He never wrote to +me without asking for money in his life, and all his letters are full +of bad spelling, and dashes, and bad grammar. It is that little +serpent of a governess who rules him." They are all alike, Miss Crawley +thought in her heart. They all want me dead, and are hankering for my +money. + +"I don't mind seeing Rawdon," she added, after a pause, and in a tone +of perfect indifference. "I had just as soon shake hands with him as +not. Provided there is no scene, why shouldn't we meet? I don't mind. +But human patience has its limits; and mind, my dear, I respectfully +decline to receive Mrs. Rawdon--I can't support that quite"--and Miss +Briggs was fain to be content with this half-message of conciliation; +and thought that the best method of bringing the old lady and her +nephew together, was to warn Rawdon to be in waiting on the Cliff, when +Miss Crawley went out for her air in her chair. There they met. I +don't know whether Miss Crawley had any private feeling of regard or +emotion upon seeing her old favourite; but she held out a couple of +fingers to him with as smiling and good-humoured an air, as if they had +met only the day before. And as for Rawdon, he turned as red as +scarlet, and wrung off Briggs's hand, so great was his rapture and his +confusion at the meeting. Perhaps it was interest that moved him: or +perhaps affection: perhaps he was touched by the change which the +illness of the last weeks had wrought in his aunt. + +"The old girl has always acted like a trump to me," he said to his +wife, as he narrated the interview, "and I felt, you know, rather +queer, and that sort of thing. I walked by the side of the +what-dy'e-call-'em, you know, and to her own door, where Bowls came to help +her in. And I wanted to go in very much, only--" + +"YOU DIDN'T GO IN, Rawdon!" screamed his wife. + +"No, my dear; I'm hanged if I wasn't afraid when it came to the point." + +"You fool! you ought to have gone in, and never come out again," +Rebecca said. + +"Don't call me names," said the big Guardsman, sulkily. "Perhaps I WAS +a fool, Becky, but you shouldn't say so"; and he gave his wife a look, +such as his countenance could wear when angered, and such as was not +pleasant to face. + +"Well, dearest, to-morrow you must be on the look-out, and go and see +her, mind, whether she asks you or no," Rebecca said, trying to soothe +her angry yoke-mate. On which he replied, that he would do exactly as +he liked, and would just thank her to keep a civil tongue in her +head--and the wounded husband went away, and passed the forenoon at the +billiard-room, sulky, silent, and suspicious. + +But before the night was over he was compelled to give in, and own, as +usual, to his wife's superior prudence and foresight, by the most +melancholy confirmation of the presentiments which she had regarding +the consequences of the mistake which he had made. Miss Crawley must +have had some emotion upon seeing him and shaking hands with him after +so long a rupture. She mused upon the meeting a considerable time. +"Rawdon is getting very fat and old, Briggs," she said to her +companion. "His nose has become red, and he is exceedingly coarse in +appearance. His marriage to that woman has hopelessly vulgarised him. +Mrs. Bute always said they drank together; and I have no doubt they do. +Yes: he smelt of gin abominably. I remarked it. Didn't you?" + +In vain Briggs interposed that Mrs. Bute spoke ill of everybody: and, +as far as a person in her humble position could judge, was an-- + +"An artful designing woman? Yes, so she is, and she does speak ill of +every one--but I am certain that woman has made Rawdon drink. All those +low people do--" + +"He was very much affected at seeing you, ma'am," the companion said; +"and I am sure, when you remember that he is going to the field of +danger--" + +"How much money has he promised you, Briggs?" the old spinster cried +out, working herself into a nervous rage--"there now, of course you +begin to cry. I hate scenes. Why am I always to be worried? Go and +cry up in your own room, and send Firkin to me--no, stop, sit down and +blow your nose, and leave off crying, and write a letter to Captain +Crawley." Poor Briggs went and placed herself obediently at the +writing-book. Its leaves were blotted all over with relics of the +firm, strong, rapid handwriting of the spinster's late amanuensis, Mrs. +Bute Crawley. + +"Begin 'My dear sir,' or 'Dear sir,' that will be better, and say you +are desired by Miss Crawley--no, by Miss Crawley's medical man, by Mr. +Creamer, to state that my health is such that all strong emotions would +be dangerous in my present delicate condition--and that I must decline +any family discussions or interviews whatever. And thank him for coming +to Brighton, and so forth, and beg him not to stay any longer on my +account. And, Miss Briggs, you may add that I wish him a bon voyage, +and that if he will take the trouble to call upon my lawyer's in Gray's +Inn Square, he will find there a communication for him. Yes, that will +do; and that will make him leave Brighton." The benevolent Briggs +penned this sentence with the utmost satisfaction. + +"To seize upon me the very day after Mrs. Bute was gone," the old lady +prattled on; "it was too indecent. Briggs, my dear, write to Mrs. +Crawley, and say SHE needn't come back. No--she needn't--and she +shan't--and I won't be a slave in my own house--and I won't be starved +and choked with poison. They all want to kill me--all--all"--and with +this the lonely old woman burst into a scream of hysterical tears. + +The last scene of her dismal Vanity Fair comedy was fast approaching; +the tawdry lamps were going out one by one; and the dark curtain was +almost ready to descend. + +That final paragraph, which referred Rawdon to Miss Crawley's solicitor +in London, and which Briggs had written so good-naturedly, consoled the +dragoon and his wife somewhat, after their first blank disappointment, +on reading the spinster's refusal of a reconciliation. And it effected +the purpose for which the old lady had caused it to be written, by +making Rawdon very eager to get to London. + +Out of Jos's losings and George Osborne's bank-notes, he paid his bill +at the inn, the landlord whereof does not probably know to this day how +doubtfully his account once stood. For, as a general sends his baggage +to the rear before an action, Rebecca had wisely packed up all their +chief valuables and sent them off under care of George's servant, who +went in charge of the trunks on the coach back to London. Rawdon and +his wife returned by the same conveyance next day. + +"I should have liked to see the old girl before we went," Rawdon said. +"She looks so cut up and altered that I'm sure she can't last long. I +wonder what sort of a cheque I shall have at Waxy's. Two hundred--it +can't be less than two hundred--hey, Becky?" + +In consequence of the repeated visits of the aides-de-camp of the +Sheriff of Middlesex, Rawdon and his wife did not go back to their +lodgings at Brompton, but put up at an inn. Early the next morning, +Rebecca had an opportunity of seeing them as she skirted that suburb on +her road to old Mrs. Sedley's house at Fulham, whither she went to look +for her dear Amelia and her Brighton friends. They were all off to +Chatham, thence to Harwich, to take shipping for Belgium with the +regiment--kind old Mrs. Sedley very much depressed and tearful, +solitary. Returning from this visit, Rebecca found her husband, who +had been off to Gray's Inn, and learnt his fate. He came back furious. + +"By Jove, Becky," says he, "she's only given me twenty pound!" + +Though it told against themselves, the joke was too good, and Becky +burst out laughing at Rawdon's discomfiture. + + + +CHAPTER XXVI + +Between London and Chatham + +On quitting Brighton, our friend George, as became a person of rank and +fashion travelling in a barouche with four horses, drove in state to a +fine hotel in Cavendish Square, where a suite of splendid rooms, and a +table magnificently furnished with plate and surrounded by a half-dozen +of black and silent waiters, was ready to receive the young gentleman +and his bride. George did the honours of the place with a princely air +to Jos and Dobbin; and Amelia, for the first time, and with exceeding +shyness and timidity, presided at what George called her own table. + +George pooh-poohed the wine and bullied the waiters royally, and Jos +gobbled the turtle with immense satisfaction. Dobbin helped him to it; +for the lady of the house, before whom the tureen was placed, was so +ignorant of the contents, that she was going to help Mr. Sedley without +bestowing upon him either calipash or calipee. + +The splendour of the entertainment, and the apartments in which it was +given, alarmed Mr. Dobbin, who remonstrated after dinner, when Jos was +asleep in the great chair. But in vain he cried out against the +enormity of turtle and champagne that was fit for an archbishop. "I've +always been accustomed to travel like a gentleman," George said, "and, +damme, my wife shall travel like a lady. As long as there's a shot in +the locker, she shall want for nothing," said the generous fellow, +quite pleased with himself for his magnificence of spirit. Nor did +Dobbin try and convince him that Amelia's happiness was not centred in +turtle-soup. + +A while after dinner, Amelia timidly expressed a wish to go and see her +mamma, at Fulham: which permission George granted her with some +grumbling. And she tripped away to her enormous bedroom, in the centre +of which stood the enormous funereal bed, "that the Emperor +Halixander's sister slep in when the allied sufferings was here," and +put on her little bonnet and shawl with the utmost eagerness and +pleasure. George was still drinking claret when she returned to the +dining-room, and made no signs of moving. "Ar'n't you coming with me, +dearest?" she asked him. No; the "dearest" had "business" that night. +His man should get her a coach and go with her. And the coach being at +the door of the hotel, Amelia made George a little disappointed curtsey +after looking vainly into his face once or twice, and went sadly down +the great staircase, Captain Dobbin after, who handed her into the +vehicle, and saw it drive away to its destination. The very valet was +ashamed of mentioning the address to the hackney-coachman before the +hotel waiters, and promised to instruct him when they got further on. + +Dobbin walked home to his old quarters and the Slaughters', thinking +very likely that it would be delightful to be in that hackney-coach, +along with Mrs. Osborne. George was evidently of quite a different +taste; for when he had taken wine enough, he went off to half-price at +the play, to see Mr. Kean perform in Shylock. Captain Osborne was a +great lover of the drama, and had himself performed high-comedy +characters with great distinction in several garrison theatrical +entertainments. Jos slept on until long after dark, when he woke up +with a start at the motions of his servant, who was removing and +emptying the decanters on the table; and the hackney-coach stand was +again put into requisition for a carriage to convey this stout hero to +his lodgings and bed. + +Mrs. Sedley, you may be sure, clasped her daughter to her heart with +all maternal eagerness and affection, running out of the door as the +carriage drew up before the little garden-gate, to welcome the weeping, +trembling, young bride. Old Mr. Clapp, who was in his shirt-sleeves, +trimming the garden-plot, shrank back alarmed. The Irish servant-lass +rushed up from the kitchen and smiled a "God bless you." Amelia could +hardly walk along the flags and up the steps into the parlour. + +How the floodgates were opened, and mother and daughter wept, when they +were together embracing each other in this sanctuary, may readily be +imagined by every reader who possesses the least sentimental turn. +When don't ladies weep? At what occasion of joy, sorrow, or other +business of life, and, after such an event as a marriage, mother and +daughter were surely at liberty to give way to a sensibility which is +as tender as it is refreshing. About a question of marriage I have seen +women who hate each other kiss and cry together quite fondly. How much +more do they feel when they love! Good mothers are married over again +at their daughters' weddings: and as for subsequent events, who does +not know how ultra-maternal grandmothers are?--in fact a woman, until +she is a grandmother, does not often really know what to be a mother +is. Let us respect Amelia and her mamma whispering and whimpering and +laughing and crying in the parlour and the twilight. Old Mr. Sedley +did. HE had not divined who was in the carriage when it drove up. He +had not flown out to meet his daughter, though he kissed her very +warmly when she entered the room (where he was occupied, as usual, with +his papers and tapes and statements of accounts), and after sitting +with the mother and daughter for a short time, he very wisely left the +little apartment in their possession. + +George's valet was looking on in a very supercilious manner at Mr. +Clapp in his shirt-sleeves, watering his rose-bushes. He took off his +hat, however, with much condescension to Mr. Sedley, who asked news +about his son-in-law, and about Jos's carriage, and whether his horses +had been down to Brighton, and about that infernal traitor Bonaparty, +and the war; until the Irish maid-servant came with a plate and a +bottle of wine, from which the old gentleman insisted upon helping the +valet. He gave him a half-guinea too, which the servant pocketed with +a mixture of wonder and contempt. "To the health of your master and +mistress, Trotter," Mr. Sedley said, "and here's something to drink +your health when you get home, Trotter." + +There were but nine days past since Amelia had left that little cottage +and home--and yet how far off the time seemed since she had bidden it +farewell. What a gulf lay between her and that past life. She could +look back to it from her present standing-place, and contemplate, +almost as another being, the young unmarried girl absorbed in her love, +having no eyes but for one special object, receiving parental affection +if not ungratefully, at least indifferently, and as if it were her +due--her whole heart and thoughts bent on the accomplishment of one +desire. The review of those days, so lately gone yet so far away, +touched her with shame; and the aspect of the kind parents filled her +with tender remorse. Was the prize gained--the heaven of life--and the +winner still doubtful and unsatisfied? As his hero and heroine pass +the matrimonial barrier, the novelist generally drops the curtain, as +if the drama were over then: the doubts and struggles of life ended: +as if, once landed in the marriage country, all were green and pleasant +there: and wife and husband had nothing to do but to link each other's +arms together, and wander gently downwards towards old age in happy and +perfect fruition. But our little Amelia was just on the bank of her +new country, and was already looking anxiously back towards the sad +friendly figures waving farewell to her across the stream, from the +other distant shore. + +In honour of the young bride's arrival, her mother thought it necessary +to prepare I don't know what festive entertainment, and after the first +ebullition of talk, took leave of Mrs. George Osborne for a while, and +dived down to the lower regions of the house to a sort of +kitchen-parlour (occupied by Mr. and Mrs. Clapp, and in the evening, +when her dishes were washed and her curl-papers removed, by Miss +Flannigan, the Irish servant), there to take measures for the preparing +of a magnificent ornamented tea. All people have their ways of +expressing kindness, and it seemed to Mrs. Sedley that a muffin and a +quantity of orange marmalade spread out in a little cut-glass saucer +would be peculiarly agreeable refreshments to Amelia in her most +interesting situation. + +While these delicacies were being transacted below, Amelia, leaving the +drawing-room, walked upstairs and found herself, she scarce knew how, +in the little room which she had occupied before her marriage, and in +that very chair in which she had passed so many bitter hours. She sank +back in its arms as if it were an old friend; and fell to thinking over +the past week, and the life beyond it. Already to be looking sadly and +vaguely back: always to be pining for something which, when obtained, +brought doubt and sadness rather than pleasure; here was the lot of our +poor little creature and harmless lost wanderer in the great struggling +crowds of Vanity Fair. + +Here she sate, and recalled to herself fondly that image of George to +which she had knelt before marriage. Did she own to herself how +different the real man was from that superb young hero whom she had +worshipped? It requires many, many years--and a man must be very bad +indeed--before a woman's pride and vanity will let her own to such a +confession. Then Rebecca's twinkling green eyes and baleful smile +lighted upon her, and filled her with dismay. And so she sate for +awhile indulging in her usual mood of selfish brooding, in that very +listless melancholy attitude in which the honest maid-servant had found +her, on the day when she brought up the letter in which George renewed +his offer of marriage. + +She looked at the little white bed, which had been hers a few days +before, and thought she would like to sleep in it that night, and wake, +as formerly, with her mother smiling over her in the morning: Then she +thought with terror of the great funereal damask pavilion in the vast +and dingy state bedroom, which was awaiting her at the grand hotel in +Cavendish Square. Dear little white bed! how many a long night had she +wept on its pillow! How she had despaired and hoped to die there; and +now were not all her wishes accomplished, and the lover of whom she had +despaired her own for ever? Kind mother! how patiently and tenderly +she had watched round that bed! She went and knelt down by the bedside; +and there this wounded and timorous, but gentle and loving soul, sought +for consolation, where as yet, it must be owned, our little girl had +but seldom looked for it. Love had been her faith hitherto; and the +sad, bleeding disappointed heart began to feel the want of another +consoler. + +Have we a right to repeat or to overhear her prayers? These, brother, +are secrets, and out of the domain of Vanity Fair, in which our story +lies. + +But this may be said, that when the tea was finally announced, our +young lady came downstairs a great deal more cheerful; that she did not +despond, or deplore her fate, or think about George's coldness, or +Rebecca's eyes, as she had been wont to do of late. She went +downstairs, and kissed her father and mother, and talked to the old +gentleman, and made him more merry than he had been for many a day. She +sate down at the piano which Dobbin had bought for her, and sang over +all her father's favourite old songs. She pronounced the tea to be +excellent, and praised the exquisite taste in which the marmalade was +arranged in the saucers. And in determining to make everybody else +happy, she found herself so; and was sound asleep in the great funereal +pavilion, and only woke up with a smile when George arrived from the +theatre. + +For the next day, George had more important "business" to transact than +that which took him to see Mr. Kean in Shylock. Immediately on his +arrival in London he had written off to his father's solicitors, +signifying his royal pleasure that an interview should take place +between them on the morrow. His hotel bill, losses at billiards and +cards to Captain Crawley had almost drained the young man's purse, +which wanted replenishing before he set out on his travels, and he had +no resource but to infringe upon the two thousand pounds which the +attorneys were commissioned to pay over to him. He had a perfect +belief in his own mind that his father would relent before very long. +How could any parent be obdurate for a length of time against such a +paragon as he was? If his mere past and personal merits did not +succeed in mollifying his father, George determined that he would +distinguish himself so prodigiously in the ensuing campaign that the +old gentleman must give in to him. And if not? Bah! the world was +before him. His luck might change at cards, and there was a deal of +spending in two thousand pounds. + +So he sent off Amelia once more in a carriage to her mamma, with strict +orders and carte blanche to the two ladies to purchase everything +requisite for a lady of Mrs. George Osborne's fashion, who was going on +a foreign tour. They had but one day to complete the outfit, and it +may be imagined that their business therefore occupied them pretty +fully. In a carriage once more, bustling about from milliner to +linen-draper, escorted back to the carriage by obsequious shopmen or +polite owners, Mrs. Sedley was herself again almost, and sincerely +happy for the first time since their misfortunes. Nor was Mrs. Amelia +at all above the pleasure of shopping, and bargaining, and seeing and +buying pretty things. (Would any man, the most philosophic, give +twopence for a woman who was?) She gave herself a little treat, +obedient to her husband's orders, and purchased a quantity of lady's +gear, showing a great deal of taste and elegant discernment, as all the +shopfolks said. + +And about the war that was ensuing, Mrs. Osborne was not much alarmed; +Bonaparty was to be crushed almost without a struggle. Margate packets +were sailing every day, filled with men of fashion and ladies of note, +on their way to Brussels and Ghent. People were going not so much to a +war as to a fashionable tour. The newspapers laughed the wretched +upstart and swindler to scorn. Such a Corsican wretch as that +withstand the armies of Europe and the genius of the immortal +Wellington! Amelia held him in utter contempt; for it needs not to be +said that this soft and gentle creature took her opinions from those +people who surrounded her, such fidelity being much too humble-minded +to think for itself. Well, in a word, she and her mother performed a +great day's shopping, and she acquitted herself with considerable +liveliness and credit on this her first appearance in the genteel world +of London. + +George meanwhile, with his hat on one side, his elbows squared, and his +swaggering martial air, made for Bedford Row, and stalked into the +attorney's offices as if he was lord of every pale-faced clerk who was +scribbling there. He ordered somebody to inform Mr. Higgs that Captain +Osborne was waiting, in a fierce and patronizing way, as if the pekin +of an attorney, who had thrice his brains, fifty times his money, and a +thousand times his experience, was a wretched underling who should +instantly leave all his business in life to attend on the Captain's +pleasure. He did not see the sneer of contempt which passed all round +the room, from the first clerk to the articled gents, from the articled +gents to the ragged writers and white-faced runners, in clothes too +tight for them, as he sate there tapping his boot with his cane, and +thinking what a parcel of miserable poor devils these were. The +miserable poor devils knew all about his affairs. They talked about +them over their pints of beer at their public-house clubs to other +clerks of a night. Ye gods, what do not attorneys and attorneys' clerks +know in London! Nothing is hidden from their inquisition, and their +families mutely rule our city. + +Perhaps George expected, when he entered Mr. Higgs's apartment, to find +that gentleman commissioned to give him some message of compromise or +conciliation from his father; perhaps his haughty and cold demeanour +was adopted as a sign of his spirit and resolution: but if so, his +fierceness was met by a chilling coolness and indifference on the +attorney's part, that rendered swaggering absurd. He pretended to be +writing at a paper, when the Captain entered. "Pray, sit down, sir," +said he, "and I will attend to your little affair in a moment. Mr. +Poe, get the release papers, if you please"; and then he fell to +writing again. + +Poe having produced those papers, his chief calculated the amount of +two thousand pounds stock at the rate of the day; and asked Captain +Osborne whether he would take the sum in a cheque upon the bankers, or +whether he should direct the latter to purchase stock to that amount. +"One of the late Mrs. Osborne's trustees is out of town," he said +indifferently, "but my client wishes to meet your wishes, and have done +with the business as quick as possible." + +"Give me a cheque, sir," said the Captain very surlily. "Damn the +shillings and halfpence, sir," he added, as the lawyer was making out +the amount of the draft; and, flattering himself that by this stroke of +magnanimity he had put the old quiz to the blush, he stalked out of the +office with the paper in his pocket. + +"That chap will be in gaol in two years," Mr. Higgs said to Mr. Poe. + +"Won't O. come round, sir, don't you think?" + +"Won't the monument come round," Mr. Higgs replied. + +"He's going it pretty fast," said the clerk. "He's only married a +week, and I saw him and some other military chaps handing Mrs. +Highflyer to her carriage after the play." And then another case was +called, and Mr. George Osborne thenceforth dismissed from these worthy +gentlemen's memory. + +The draft was upon our friends Hulker and Bullock of Lombard Street, to +whose house, still thinking he was doing business, George bent his way, +and from whom he received his money. Frederick Bullock, Esq., whose +yellow face was over a ledger, at which sate a demure clerk, happened +to be in the banking-room when George entered. His yellow face turned +to a more deadly colour when he saw the Captain, and he slunk back +guiltily into the inmost parlour. George was too busy gloating over +the money (for he had never had such a sum before), to mark the +countenance or flight of the cadaverous suitor of his sister. + +Fred Bullock told old Osborne of his son's appearance and conduct. "He +came in as bold as brass," said Frederick. "He has drawn out every +shilling. How long will a few hundred pounds last such a chap as +that?" Osborne swore with a great oath that he little cared when or how +soon he spent it. Fred dined every day in Russell Square now. But +altogether, George was highly pleased with his day's business. All his +own baggage and outfit was put into a state of speedy preparation, and +he paid Amelia's purchases with cheques on his agents, and with the +splendour of a lord. + + + +CHAPTER XXVII + +In Which Amelia Joins Her Regiment + +When Jos's fine carriage drove up to the inn door at Chatham, the first +face which Amelia recognized was the friendly countenance of Captain +Dobbin, who had been pacing the street for an hour past in expectation +of his friends' arrival. The Captain, with shells on his frockcoat, +and a crimson sash and sabre, presented a military appearance, which +made Jos quite proud to be able to claim such an acquaintance, and the +stout civilian hailed him with a cordiality very different from the +reception which Jos vouchsafed to his friend in Brighton and Bond +Street. + +Along with the Captain was Ensign Stubble; who, as the barouche neared +the inn, burst out with an exclamation of "By Jove! what a pretty +girl"; highly applauding Osborne's choice. Indeed, Amelia dressed in +her wedding-pelisse and pink ribbons, with a flush in her face, +occasioned by rapid travel through the open air, looked so fresh and +pretty, as fully to justify the Ensign's compliment. Dobbin liked him +for making it. As he stepped forward to help the lady out of the +carriage, Stubble saw what a pretty little hand she gave him, and what +a sweet pretty little foot came tripping down the step. He blushed +profusely, and made the very best bow of which he was capable; to which +Amelia, seeing the number of the the regiment embroidered on the +Ensign's cap, replied with a blushing smile, and a curtsey on her part; +which finished the young Ensign on the spot. Dobbin took most kindly to +Mr. Stubble from that day, and encouraged him to talk about Amelia in +their private walks, and at each other's quarters. It became the +fashion, indeed, among all the honest young fellows of the --th to +adore and admire Mrs. Osborne. Her simple artless behaviour, and +modest kindness of demeanour, won all their unsophisticated hearts; all +which simplicity and sweetness are quite impossible to describe in +print. But who has not beheld these among women, and recognised the +presence of all sorts of qualities in them, even though they say no +more to you than that they are engaged to dance the next quadrille, or +that it is very hot weather? George, always the champion of his +regiment, rose immensely in the opinion of the youth of the corps, by +his gallantry in marrying this portionless young creature, and by his +choice of such a pretty kind partner. + +In the sitting-room which was awaiting the travellers, Amelia, to her +surprise, found a letter addressed to Mrs. Captain Osborne. It was a +triangular billet, on pink paper, and sealed with a dove and an olive +branch, and a profusion of light blue sealing wax, and it was written +in a very large, though undecided female hand. + +"It's Peggy O'Dowd's fist," said George, laughing. "I know it by the +kisses on the seal." And in fact, it was a note from Mrs. Major O'Dowd, +requesting the pleasure of Mrs. Osborne's company that very evening to +a small friendly party. "You must go," George said. "You will make +acquaintance with the regiment there. O'Dowd goes in command of the +regiment, and Peggy goes in command." + +But they had not been for many minutes in the enjoyment of Mrs. +O'Dowd's letter, when the door was flung open, and a stout jolly lady, +in a riding-habit, followed by a couple of officers of Ours, entered +the room. + +"Sure, I couldn't stop till tay-time. Present me, Garge, my dear +fellow, to your lady. Madam, I'm deloighted to see ye; and to present +to you me husband, Meejor O'Dowd"; and with this, the jolly lady in the +riding-habit grasped Amelia's hand very warmly, and the latter knew at +once that the lady was before her whom her husband had so often laughed +at. "You've often heard of me from that husband of yours," said the +lady, with great vivacity. + +"You've often heard of her," echoed her husband, the Major. + +Amelia answered, smiling, "that she had." + +"And small good he's told you of me," Mrs. O'Dowd replied; adding that +"George was a wicked divvle." + +"That I'll go bail for," said the Major, trying to look knowing, at +which George laughed; and Mrs. O'Dowd, with a tap of her whip, told the +Major to be quiet; and then requested to be presented in form to Mrs. +Captain Osborne. + +"This, my dear," said George with great gravity, "is my very good, +kind, and excellent friend, Auralia Margaretta, otherwise called Peggy." + +"Faith, you're right," interposed the Major. + +"Otherwise called Peggy, lady of Major Michael O'Dowd, of our regiment, +and daughter of Fitzjurld Ber'sford de Burgo Malony of Glenmalony, +County Kildare." + +"And Muryan Squeer, Doblin," said the lady with calm superiority. + +"And Muryan Square, sure enough," the Major whispered. + +"'Twas there ye coorted me, Meejor dear," the lady said; and the Major +assented to this as to every other proposition which was made generally +in company. + +Major O'Dowd, who had served his sovereign in every quarter of the +world, and had paid for every step in his profession by some more than +equivalent act of daring and gallantry, was the most modest, silent, +sheep-faced and meek of little men, and as obedient to his wife as if +he had been her tay-boy. At the mess-table he sat silently, and drank +a great deal. When full of liquor, he reeled silently home. When he +spoke, it was to agree with everybody on every conceivable point; and +he passed through life in perfect ease and good-humour. The hottest +suns of India never heated his temper; and the Walcheren ague never +shook it. He walked up to a battery with just as much indifference as +to a dinner-table; had dined on horse-flesh and turtle with equal +relish and appetite; and had an old mother, Mrs. O'Dowd of O'Dowdstown +indeed, whom he had never disobeyed but when he ran away and enlisted, +and when he persisted in marrying that odious Peggy Malony. + +Peggy was one of five sisters, and eleven children of the noble house +of Glenmalony; but her husband, though her own cousin, was of the +mother's side, and so had not the inestimable advantage of being allied +to the Malonys, whom she believed to be the most famous family in the +world. Having tried nine seasons at Dublin and two at Bath and +Cheltenham, and not finding a partner for life, Miss Malony ordered her +cousin Mick to marry her when she was about thirty-three years of age; +and the honest fellow obeying, carried her off to the West Indies, to +preside over the ladies of the --th regiment, into which he had just +exchanged. + +Before Mrs. O'Dowd was half an hour in Amelia's (or indeed in anybody +else's) company, this amiable lady told all her birth and pedigree to +her new friend. "My dear," said she, good-naturedly, "it was my +intention that Garge should be a brother of my own, and my sister +Glorvina would have suited him entirely. But as bygones are bygones, +and he was engaged to yourself, why, I'm determined to take you as a +sister instead, and to look upon you as such, and to love you as one of +the family. Faith, you've got such a nice good-natured face and way +widg you, that I'm sure we'll agree; and that you'll be an addition to +our family anyway." + +"'Deed and she will," said O'Dowd, with an approving air, and Amelia +felt herself not a little amused and grateful to be thus suddenly +introduced to so large a party of relations. + +"We're all good fellows here," the Major's lady continued. "There's not +a regiment in the service where you'll find a more united society nor a +more agreeable mess-room. There's no quarrelling, bickering, +slandthering, nor small talk amongst us. We all love each other." + +"Especially Mrs. Magenis," said George, laughing. + +"Mrs. Captain Magenis and me has made up, though her treatment of me +would bring me gray hairs with sorrow to the grave." + +"And you with such a beautiful front of black, Peggy, my dear," the +Major cried. + +"Hould your tongue, Mick, you booby. Them husbands are always in the +way, Mrs. Osborne, my dear; and as for my Mick, I often tell him he +should never open his mouth but to give the word of command, or to put +meat and drink into it. I'll tell you about the regiment, and warn you +when we're alone. Introduce me to your brother now; sure he's a mighty +fine man, and reminds me of me cousin, Dan Malony (Malony of +Ballymalony, my dear, you know who mar'ied Ophalia Scully, of +Oystherstown, own cousin to Lord Poldoody). Mr. Sedley, sir, I'm +deloighted to be made known te ye. I suppose you'll dine at the mess +to-day. (Mind that divvle of a docther, Mick, and whatever ye du, keep +yourself sober for me party this evening.)" + +"It's the 150th gives us a farewell dinner, my love," interposed the +Major, "but we'll easy get a card for Mr. Sedley." + +"Run Simple (Ensign Simple, of Ours, my dear Amelia. I forgot to +introjuice him to ye). Run in a hurry, with Mrs. Major O'Dowd's +compliments to Colonel Tavish, and Captain Osborne has brought his +brothernlaw down, and will bring him to the 150th mess at five o'clock +sharp--when you and I, my dear, will take a snack here, if you like." +Before Mrs. O'Dowd's speech was concluded, the young Ensign was +trotting downstairs on his commission. + +"Obedience is the soul of the army. We will go to our duty while Mrs. +O'Dowd will stay and enlighten you, Emmy," Captain Osborne said; and +the two gentlemen, taking each a wing of the Major, walked out with +that officer, grinning at each other over his head. + +And, now having her new friend to herself, the impetuous Mrs. O'Dowd +proceeded to pour out such a quantity of information as no poor little +woman's memory could ever tax itself to bear. She told Amelia a +thousand particulars relative to the very numerous family of which the +amazed young lady found herself a member. "Mrs. Heavytop, the +Colonel's wife, died in Jamaica of the yellow faver and a broken heart +comboined, for the horrud old Colonel, with a head as bald as a +cannon-ball, was making sheep's eyes at a half-caste girl there. Mrs. +Magenis, though without education, was a good woman, but she had the +divvle's tongue, and would cheat her own mother at whist. Mrs. Captain +Kirk must turn up her lobster eyes forsooth at the idea of an honest +round game (wherein me fawther, as pious a man as ever went to church, +me uncle Dane Malony, and our cousin the Bishop, took a hand at loo, or +whist, every night of their lives). Nayther of 'em's goin' with the +regiment this time," Mrs. O'Dowd added. "Fanny Magenis stops with her +mother, who sells small coal and potatoes, most likely, in +Islington-town, hard by London, though she's always bragging of her +father's ships, and pointing them out to us as they go up the river: +and Mrs. Kirk and her children will stop here in Bethesda Place, to be +nigh to her favourite preacher, Dr. Ramshorn. Mrs. Bunny's in an +interesting situation--faith, and she always is, then--and has given +the Lieutenant seven already. And Ensign Posky's wife, who joined two +months before you, my dear, has quarl'd with Tom Posky a score of +times, till you can hear'm all over the bar'ck (they say they're come +to broken pleets, and Tom never accounted for his black oi), and she'll +go back to her mother, who keeps a ladies' siminary at Richmond--bad +luck to her for running away from it! Where did ye get your finishing, +my dear? I had moin, and no expince spared, at Madame Flanahan's, at +Ilyssus Grove, Booterstown, near Dublin, wid a Marchioness to teach us +the true Parisian pronunciation, and a retired Mejor-General of the +French service to put us through the exercise." + +Of this incongruous family our astonished Amelia found herself all of a +sudden a member: with Mrs. O'Dowd as an elder sister. She was +presented to her other female relations at tea-time, on whom, as she +was quiet, good-natured, and not too handsome, she made rather an +agreeable impression until the arrival of the gentlemen from the mess +of the 150th, who all admired her so, that her sisters began, of +course, to find fault with her. + +"I hope Osborne has sown his wild oats," said Mrs. Magenis to Mrs. +Bunny. "If a reformed rake makes a good husband, sure it's she will +have the fine chance with Garge," Mrs. O'Dowd remarked to Posky, who +had lost her position as bride in the regiment, and was quite angry +with the usurper. And as for Mrs. Kirk: that disciple of Dr. Ramshorn +put one or two leading professional questions to Amelia, to see whether +she was awakened, whether she was a professing Christian and so forth, +and finding from the simplicity of Mrs. Osborne's replies that she was +yet in utter darkness, put into her hands three little penny books with +pictures, viz., the "Howling Wilderness," the "Washerwoman of +Wandsworth Common," and the "British Soldier's best Bayonet," which, +bent upon awakening her before she slept, Mrs. Kirk begged Amelia to +read that night ere she went to bed. + +But all the men, like good fellows as they were, rallied round their +comrade's pretty wife, and paid her their court with soldierly +gallantry. She had a little triumph, which flushed her spirits and +made her eyes sparkle. George was proud of her popularity, and pleased +with the manner (which was very gay and graceful, though naive and a +little timid) with which she received the gentlemen's attentions, and +answered their compliments. And he in his uniform--how much handsomer +he was than any man in the room! She felt that he was affectionately +watching her, and glowed with pleasure at his kindness. "I will make +all his friends welcome," she resolved in her heart. "I will love all +as I love him. I will always try and be gay and good-humoured and make +his home happy." + +The regiment indeed adopted her with acclamation. The Captains +approved, the Lieutenants applauded, the Ensigns admired. Old Cutler, +the Doctor, made one or two jokes, which, being professional, need not +be repeated; and Cackle, the Assistant M.D. of Edinburgh, condescended +to examine her upon leeterature, and tried her with his three best +French quotations. Young Stubble went about from man to man +whispering, "Jove, isn't she a pretty gal?" and never took his eyes off +her except when the negus came in. + +As for Captain Dobbin, he never so much as spoke to her during the +whole evening. But he and Captain Porter of the 150th took home Jos to +the hotel, who was in a very maudlin state, and had told his tiger-hunt +story with great effect, both at the mess-table and at the soiree, to +Mrs. O'Dowd in her turban and bird of paradise. Having put the +Collector into the hands of his servant, Dobbin loitered about, smoking +his cigar before the inn door. George had meanwhile very carefully +shawled his wife, and brought her away from Mrs. O'Dowd's after a +general handshaking from the young officers, who accompanied her to the +fly, and cheered that vehicle as it drove off. So Amelia gave Dobbin +her little hand as she got out of the carriage, and rebuked him +smilingly for not having taken any notice of her all night. + +The Captain continued that deleterious amusement of smoking, long after +the inn and the street were gone to bed. He watched the lights vanish +from George's sitting-room windows, and shine out in the bedroom close +at hand. It was almost morning when he returned to his own quarters. +He could hear the cheering from the ships in the river, where the +transports were already taking in their cargoes preparatory to dropping +down the Thames. + + + +CHAPTER XXVIII + +In Which Amelia Invades the Low Countries + +The regiment with its officers was to be transported in ships provided +by His Majesty's government for the occasion: and in two days after +the festive assembly at Mrs. O'Dowd's apartments, in the midst of +cheering from all the East India ships in the river, and the military +on shore, the band playing "God Save the King," the officers waving +their hats, and the crews hurrahing gallantly, the transports went down +the river and proceeded under convoy to Ostend. Meanwhile the gallant +Jos had agreed to escort his sister and the Major's wife, the bulk of +whose goods and chattels, including the famous bird of paradise and +turban, were with the regimental baggage: so that our two heroines +drove pretty much unencumbered to Ramsgate, where there were plenty of +packets plying, in one of which they had a speedy passage to Ostend. + +That period of Jos's life which now ensued was so full of incident, +that it served him for conversation for many years after, and even the +tiger-hunt story was put aside for more stirring narratives which he +had to tell about the great campaign of Waterloo. As soon as he had +agreed to escort his sister abroad, it was remarked that he ceased +shaving his upper lip. At Chatham he followed the parades and drills +with great assiduity. He listened with the utmost attention to the +conversation of his brother officers (as he called them in after days +sometimes), and learned as many military names as he could. In these +studies the excellent Mrs. O'Dowd was of great assistance to him; and +on the day finally when they embarked on board the Lovely Rose, which +was to carry them to their destination, he made his appearance in a +braided frock-coat and duck trousers, with a foraging cap ornamented +with a smart gold band. Having his carriage with him, and informing +everybody on board confidentially that he was going to join the Duke of +Wellington's army, folks mistook him for a great personage, a +commissary-general, or a government courier at the very least. + +He suffered hugely on the voyage, during which the ladies were likewise +prostrate; but Amelia was brought to life again as the packet made +Ostend, by the sight of the transports conveying her regiment, which +entered the harbour almost at the same time with the Lovely Rose. Jos +went in a collapsed state to an inn, while Captain Dobbin escorted the +ladies, and then busied himself in freeing Jos's carriage and luggage +from the ship and the custom-house, for Mr. Jos was at present without +a servant, Osborne's man and his own pampered menial having conspired +together at Chatham, and refused point-blank to cross the water. This +revolt, which came very suddenly, and on the last day, so alarmed Mr. +Sedley, junior, that he was on the point of giving up the expedition, +but Captain Dobbin (who made himself immensely officious in the +business, Jos said), rated him and laughed at him soundly: the +mustachios were grown in advance, and Jos finally was persuaded to +embark. In place of the well-bred and well-fed London domestics, who +could only speak English, Dobbin procured for Jos's party a swarthy +little Belgian servant who could speak no language at all; but who, by +his bustling behaviour, and by invariably addressing Mr. Sedley as "My +lord," speedily acquired that gentleman's favour. Times are altered at +Ostend now; of the Britons who go thither, very few look like lords, or +act like those members of our hereditary aristocracy. They seem for +the most part shabby in attire, dingy of linen, lovers of billiards and +brandy, and cigars and greasy ordinaries. + +But it may be said as a rule, that every Englishman in the Duke of +Wellington's army paid his way. The remembrance of such a fact surely +becomes a nation of shopkeepers. It was a blessing for a +commerce-loving country to be overrun by such an army of customers: and +to have such creditable warriors to feed. And the country which they +came to protect is not military. For a long period of history they +have let other people fight there. When the present writer went to +survey with eagle glance the field of Waterloo, we asked the conductor +of the diligence, a portly warlike-looking veteran, whether he had been +at the battle. "Pas si bete"--such an answer and sentiment as no +Frenchman would own to--was his reply. But, on the other hand, the +postilion who drove us was a Viscount, a son of some bankrupt Imperial +General, who accepted a pennyworth of beer on the road. The moral is +surely a good one. + +This flat, flourishing, easy country never could have looked more rich +and prosperous than in that opening summer of 1815, when its green +fields and quiet cities were enlivened by multiplied red-coats: when +its wide chaussees swarmed with brilliant English equipages: when its +great canal-boats, gliding by rich pastures and pleasant quaint old +villages, by old chateaux lying amongst old trees, were all crowded +with well-to-do English travellers: when the soldier who drank at the +village inn, not only drank, but paid his score; and Donald, the +Highlander, billeted in the Flemish farm-house, rocked the baby's +cradle, while Jean and Jeannette were out getting in the hay. As our +painters are bent on military subjects just now, I throw out this as a +good subject for the pencil, to illustrate the principle of an honest +English war. All looked as brilliant and harmless as a Hyde Park +review. Meanwhile, Napoleon screened behind his curtain of +frontier-fortresses, was preparing for the outbreak which was to drive +all these orderly people into fury and blood; and lay so many of them +low. + +Everybody had such a perfect feeling of confidence in the leader (for +the resolute faith which the Duke of Wellington had inspired in the +whole English nation was as intense as that more frantic enthusiasm +with which at one time the French regarded Napoleon), the country +seemed in so perfect a state of orderly defence, and the help at hand +in case of need so near and overwhelming, that alarm was unknown, and +our travellers, among whom two were naturally of a very timid sort, +were, like all the other multiplied English tourists, entirely at ease. +The famous regiment, with so many of whose officers we have made +acquaintance, was drafted in canal boats to Bruges and Ghent, thence to +march to Brussels. Jos accompanied the ladies in the public boats; the +which all old travellers in Flanders must remember for the luxury and +accommodation they afforded. So prodigiously good was the eating and +drinking on board these sluggish but most comfortable vessels, that +there are legends extant of an English traveller, who, coming to +Belgium for a week, and travelling in one of these boats, was so +delighted with the fare there that he went backwards and forwards from +Ghent to Bruges perpetually until the railroads were invented, when he +drowned himself on the last trip of the passage-boat. Jos's death was +not to be of this sort, but his comfort was exceeding, and Mrs. O'Dowd +insisted that he only wanted her sister Glorvina to make his happiness +complete. He sate on the roof of the cabin all day drinking Flemish +beer, shouting for Isidor, his servant, and talking gallantly to the +ladies. + +His courage was prodigious. "Boney attack us!" he cried. "My dear +creature, my poor Emmy, don't be frightened. There's no danger. The +allies will be in Paris in two months, I tell you; when I'll take you +to dine in the Palais Royal, by Jove! There are three hundred thousand +Rooshians, I tell you, now entering France by Mayence and the +Rhine--three hundred thousand under Wittgenstein and Barclay de Tolly, +my poor love. You don't know military affairs, my dear. I do, and I +tell you there's no infantry in France can stand against Rooshian +infantry, and no general of Boney's that's fit to hold a candle to +Wittgenstein. Then there are the Austrians, they are five hundred +thousand if a man, and they are within ten marches of the frontier by +this time, under Schwartzenberg and Prince Charles. Then there are the +Prooshians under the gallant Prince Marshal. Show me a cavalry chief +like him now that Murat is gone. Hey, Mrs. O'Dowd? Do you think our +little girl here need be afraid? Is there any cause for fear, Isidor? +Hey, sir? Get some more beer." + +Mrs. O'Dowd said that her "Glorvina was not afraid of any man alive, +let alone a Frenchman," and tossed off a glass of beer with a wink +which expressed her liking for the beverage. + +Having frequently been in presence of the enemy, or, in other words, +faced the ladies at Cheltenham and Bath, our friend, the Collector, had +lost a great deal of his pristine timidity, and was now, especially +when fortified with liquor, as talkative as might be. He was rather a +favourite with the regiment, treating the young officers with +sumptuosity, and amusing them by his military airs. And as there is one +well-known regiment of the army which travels with a goat heading the +column, whilst another is led by a deer, George said with respect to +his brother-in-law, that his regiment marched with an elephant. + +Since Amelia's introduction to the regiment, George began to be rather +ashamed of some of the company to which he had been forced to present +her; and determined, as he told Dobbin (with what satisfaction to the +latter it need not be said), to exchange into some better regiment +soon, and to get his wife away from those damned vulgar women. But +this vulgarity of being ashamed of one's society is much more common +among men than women (except very great ladies of fashion, who, to be +sure, indulge in it); and Mrs. Amelia, a natural and unaffected person, +had none of that artificial shamefacedness which her husband mistook +for delicacy on his own part. Thus Mrs. O'Dowd had a cock's plume in +her hat, and a very large "repayther" on her stomach, which she used to +ring on all occasions, narrating how it had been presented to her by +her fawther, as she stipt into the car'ge after her mar'ge; and these +ornaments, with other outward peculiarities of the Major's wife, gave +excruciating agonies to Captain Osborne, when his wife and the Major's +came in contact; whereas Amelia was only amused by the honest lady's +eccentricities, and not in the least ashamed of her company. + +As they made that well-known journey, which almost every Englishman of +middle rank has travelled since, there might have been more +instructive, but few more entertaining, companions than Mrs. Major +O'Dowd. "Talk about kenal boats; my dear! Ye should see the kenal +boats between Dublin and Ballinasloe. It's there the rapid travelling +is; and the beautiful cattle. Sure me fawther got a goold medal (and +his Excellency himself eat a slice of it, and said never was finer mate +in his loif) for a four-year-old heifer, the like of which ye never saw +in this country any day." And Jos owned with a sigh, "that for good +streaky beef, really mingled with fat and lean, there was no country +like England." + +"Except Ireland, where all your best mate comes from," said the Major's +lady; proceeding, as is not unusual with patriots of her nation, to +make comparisons greatly in favour of her own country. The idea of +comparing the market at Bruges with those of Dublin, although she had +suggested it herself, caused immense scorn and derision on her part. +"I'll thank ye tell me what they mean by that old gazabo on the top of +the market-place," said she, in a burst of ridicule fit to have brought +the old tower down. The place was full of English soldiery as they +passed. English bugles woke them in the morning; at nightfall they +went to bed to the note of the British fife and drum: all the country +and Europe was in arms, and the greatest event of history pending: and +honest Peggy O'Dowd, whom it concerned as well as another, went on +prattling about Ballinafad, and the horses in the stables at +Glenmalony, and the clar't drunk there; and Jos Sedley interposed about +curry and rice at Dumdum; and Amelia thought about her husband, and how +best she should show her love for him; as if these were the great +topics of the world. + +Those who like to lay down the History-book, and to speculate upon what +MIGHT have happened in the world, but for the fatal occurrence of what +actually did take place (a most puzzling, amusing, ingenious, and +profitable kind of meditation), have no doubt often thought to +themselves what a specially bad time Napoleon took to come back from +Elba, and to let loose his eagle from Gulf San Juan to Notre Dame. The +historians on our side tell us that the armies of the allied powers +were all providentially on a war-footing, and ready to bear down at a +moment's notice upon the Elban Emperor. The august jobbers assembled at +Vienna, and carving out the kingdoms of Europe according to their +wisdom, had such causes of quarrel among themselves as might have set +the armies which had overcome Napoleon to fight against each other, but +for the return of the object of unanimous hatred and fear. This +monarch had an army in full force because he had jobbed to himself +Poland, and was determined to keep it: another had robbed half Saxony, +and was bent upon maintaining his acquisition: Italy was the object of +a third's solicitude. Each was protesting against the rapacity of the +other; and could the Corsican but have waited in prison until all these +parties were by the ears, he might have returned and reigned +unmolested. But what would have become of our story and all our +friends, then? If all the drops in it were dried up, what would become +of the sea? + +In the meanwhile the business of life and living, and the pursuits of +pleasure, especially, went on as if no end were to be expected to them, +and no enemy in front. When our travellers arrived at Brussels, in +which their regiment was quartered, a great piece of good fortune, as +all said, they found themselves in one of the gayest and most brilliant +little capitals in Europe, and where all the Vanity Fair booths were +laid out with the most tempting liveliness and splendour. Gambling was +here in profusion, and dancing in plenty: feasting was there to fill +with delight that great gourmand of a Jos: there was a theatre where a +miraculous Catalani was delighting all hearers: beautiful rides, all +enlivened with martial splendour; a rare old city, with strange +costumes and wonderful architecture, to delight the eyes of little +Amelia, who had never before seen a foreign country, and fill her with +charming surprises: so that now and for a few weeks' space in a fine +handsome lodging, whereof the expenses were borne by Jos and Osborne, +who was flush of money and full of kind attentions to his wife--for +about a fortnight, I say, during which her honeymoon ended, Mrs. Amelia +was as pleased and happy as any little bride out of England. + +Every day during this happy time there was novelty and amusement for +all parties. There was a church to see, or a picture-gallery--there +was a ride, or an opera. The bands of the regiments were making music +at all hours. The greatest folks of England walked in the Park--there +was a perpetual military festival. George, taking out his wife to a +new jaunt or junket every night, was quite pleased with himself as +usual, and swore he was becoming quite a domestic character. And a +jaunt or a junket with HIM! Was it not enough to set this little heart +beating with joy? Her letters home to her mother were filled with +delight and gratitude at this season. Her husband bade her buy laces, +millinery, jewels, and gimcracks of all sorts. Oh, he was the kindest, +best, and most generous of men! + +The sight of the very great company of lords and ladies and fashionable +persons who thronged the town, and appeared in every public place, +filled George's truly British soul with intense delight. They flung +off that happy frigidity and insolence of demeanour which occasionally +characterises the great at home, and appearing in numberless public +places, condescended to mingle with the rest of the company whom they +met there. One night at a party given by the general of the division +to which George's regiment belonged, he had the honour of dancing with +Lady Blanche Thistlewood, Lord Bareacres' daughter; he bustled for ices +and refreshments for the two noble ladies; he pushed and squeezed for +Lady Bareacres' carriage; he bragged about the Countess when he got +home, in a way which his own father could not have surpassed. He +called upon the ladies the next day; he rode by their side in the Park; +he asked their party to a great dinner at a restaurateur's, and was +quite wild with exultation when they agreed to come. Old Bareacres, +who had not much pride and a large appetite, would go for a dinner +anywhere. + +"I hope there will be no women besides our own party," Lady Bareacres +said, after reflecting upon the invitation which had been made, and +accepted with too much precipitancy. + +"Gracious Heaven, Mamma--you don't suppose the man would bring his +wife," shrieked Lady Blanche, who had been languishing in George's arms +in the newly imported waltz for hours the night before. "The men are +bearable, but their women--" + +"Wife, just married, dev'lish pretty woman, I hear," the old Earl said. + +"Well, my dear Blanche," said the mother, "I suppose, as Papa wants to +go, we must go; but we needn't know them in England, you know." And so, +determined to cut their new acquaintance in Bond Street, these great +folks went to eat his dinner at Brussels, and condescending to make him +pay for their pleasure, showed their dignity by making his wife +uncomfortable, and carefully excluding her from the conversation. This +is a species of dignity in which the high-bred British female reigns +supreme. To watch the behaviour of a fine lady to other and humbler +women, is a very good sport for a philosophical frequenter of Vanity +Fair. + +This festival, on which honest George spent a great deal of money, was +the very dismallest of all the entertainments which Amelia had in her +honeymoon. She wrote the most piteous accounts of the feast home to +her mamma: how the Countess of Bareacres would not answer when spoken +to; how Lady Blanche stared at her with her eye-glass; and what a rage +Captain Dobbin was in at their behaviour; and how my lord, as they came +away from the feast, asked to see the bill, and pronounced it a d---- +bad dinner, and d---- dear. But though Amelia told all these stories, +and wrote home regarding her guests' rudeness, and her own +discomfiture, old Mrs. Sedley was mightily pleased nevertheless, and +talked about Emmy's friend, the Countess of Bareacres, with such +assiduity that the news how his son was entertaining peers and +peeresses actually came to Osborne's ears in the City. + +Those who know the present Lieutenant-General Sir George Tufto, K.C.B., +and have seen him, as they may on most days in the season, padded and +in stays, strutting down Pall Mall with a rickety swagger on his +high-heeled lacquered boots, leering under the bonnets of passers-by, +or riding a showy chestnut, and ogling broughams in the Parks--those +who know the present Sir George Tufto would hardly recognise the daring +Peninsular and Waterloo officer. He has thick curling brown hair and +black eyebrows now, and his whiskers are of the deepest purple. He was +light-haired and bald in 1815, and stouter in the person and in the +limbs, which especially have shrunk very much of late. When he was +about seventy years of age (he is now nearly eighty), his hair, which +was very scarce and quite white, suddenly grew thick, and brown, and +curly, and his whiskers and eyebrows took their present colour. +Ill-natured people say that his chest is all wool, and that his hair, +because it never grows, is a wig. Tom Tufto, with whose father he +quarrelled ever so many years ago, declares that Mademoiselle de +Jaisey, of the French theatre, pulled his grandpapa's hair off in the +green-room; but Tom is notoriously spiteful and jealous; and the +General's wig has nothing to do with our story. + +One day, as some of our friends of the --th were sauntering in the +flower-market of Brussels, having been to see the Hotel de Ville, which +Mrs. Major O'Dowd declared was not near so large or handsome as her +fawther's mansion of Glenmalony, an officer of rank, with an orderly +behind him, rode up to the market, and descending from his horse, came +amongst the flowers, and selected the very finest bouquet which money +could buy. The beautiful bundle being tied up in a paper, the officer +remounted, giving the nosegay into the charge of his military groom, +who carried it with a grin, following his chief, who rode away in great +state and self-satisfaction. + +"You should see the flowers at Glenmalony," Mrs. O'Dowd was remarking. +"Me fawther has three Scotch garners with nine helpers. We have an acre +of hot-houses, and pines as common as pays in the sayson. Our greeps +weighs six pounds every bunch of 'em, and upon me honour and conscience +I think our magnolias is as big as taykettles." + +Dobbin, who never used to "draw out" Mrs. O'Dowd as that wicked Osborne +delighted in doing (much to Amelia's terror, who implored him to spare +her), fell back in the crowd, crowing and sputtering until he reached a +safe distance, when he exploded amongst the astonished market-people +with shrieks of yelling laughter. + +"Hwhat's that gawky guggling about?" said Mrs. O'Dowd. "Is it his nose +bleedn? He always used to say 'twas his nose bleedn, till he must have +pomped all the blood out of 'um. An't the magnolias at Glenmalony as +big as taykettles, O'Dowd?" + +"'Deed then they are, and bigger, Peggy," the Major said. When the +conversation was interrupted in the manner stated by the arrival of the +officer who purchased the bouquet. + +"Devlish fine horse--who is it?" George asked. + +"You should see me brother Molloy Malony's horse, Molasses, that won +the cop at the Curragh," the Major's wife was exclaiming, and was +continuing the family history, when her husband interrupted her by +saying-- + +"It's General Tufto, who commands the ---- cavalry division"; adding +quietly, "he and I were both shot in the same leg at Talavera." + +"Where you got your step," said George with a laugh. "General Tufto! +Then, my dear, the Crawleys are come." + +Amelia's heart fell--she knew not why. The sun did not seem to shine +so bright. The tall old roofs and gables looked less picturesque all +of a sudden, though it was a brilliant sunset, and one of the brightest +and most beautiful days at the end of May. + + + +CHAPTER XXIX + +Brussels + +Mr. Jos had hired a pair of horses for his open carriage, with which +cattle, and the smart London vehicle, he made a very tolerable figure +in the drives about Brussels. George purchased a horse for his private +riding, and he and Captain Dobbin would often accompany the carriage in +which Jos and his sister took daily excursions of pleasure. They went +out that day in the park for their accustomed diversion, and there, +sure enough, George's remark with regard to the arrival of Rawdon +Crawley and his wife proved to be correct. In the midst of a little +troop of horsemen, consisting of some of the very greatest persons in +Brussels, Rebecca was seen in the prettiest and tightest of +riding-habits, mounted on a beautiful little Arab, which she rode to +perfection (having acquired the art at Queen's Crawley, where the +Baronet, Mr. Pitt, and Rawdon himself had given her many lessons), and +by the side of the gallant General Tufto. + +"Sure it's the Juke himself," cried Mrs. Major O'Dowd to Jos, who began +to blush violently; "and that's Lord Uxbridge on the bay. How elegant +he looks! Me brother, Molloy Malony, is as like him as two pays." + +Rebecca did not make for the carriage; but as soon as she perceived her +old acquaintance Amelia seated in it, acknowledged her presence by a +gracious nod and smile, and by kissing and shaking her fingers +playfully in the direction of the vehicle. Then she resumed her +conversation with General Tufto, who asked "who the fat officer was in +the gold-laced cap?" on which Becky replied, "that he was an officer in +the East Indian service." But Rawdon Crawley rode out of the ranks of +his company, and came up and shook hands heartily with Amelia, and said +to Jos, "Well, old boy, how are you?" and stared in Mrs. O'Dowd's face +and at the black cock's feathers until she began to think she had made +a conquest of him. + +George, who had been delayed behind, rode up almost immediately with +Dobbin, and they touched their caps to the august personages, among +whom Osborne at once perceived Mrs. Crawley. He was delighted to see +Rawdon leaning over his carriage familiarly and talking to Amelia, and +met the aide-de-camp's cordial greeting with more than corresponding +warmth. The nods between Rawdon and Dobbin were of the very faintest +specimens of politeness. + +Crawley told George where they were stopping with General Tufto at the +Hotel du Parc, and George made his friend promise to come speedily to +Osborne's own residence. "Sorry I hadn't seen you three days ago," +George said. "Had a dinner at the Restaurateur's--rather a nice thing. +Lord Bareacres, and the Countess, and Lady Blanche, were good enough to +dine with us--wish we'd had you." Having thus let his friend know his +claims to be a man of fashion, Osborne parted from Rawdon, who followed +the august squadron down an alley into which they cantered, while +George and Dobbin resumed their places, one on each side of Amelia's +carriage. + +"How well the Juke looked," Mrs. O'Dowd remarked. "The Wellesleys and +Malonys are related; but, of course, poor I would never dream of +introjuicing myself unless his Grace thought proper to remember our +family-tie." + +"He's a great soldier," Jos said, much more at ease now the great man +was gone. "Was there ever a battle won like Salamanca? Hey, Dobbin? +But where was it he learnt his art? In India, my boy! The jungle's +the school for a general, mark me that. I knew him myself, too, Mrs. +O'Dowd: we both of us danced the same evening with Miss Cutler, +daughter of Cutler of the Artillery, and a devilish fine girl, at +Dumdum." + +The apparition of the great personages held them all in talk during the +drive; and at dinner; and until the hour came when they were all to go +to the Opera. + +It was almost like Old England. The house was filled with familiar +British faces, and those toilettes for which the British female has +long been celebrated. Mrs. O'Dowd's was not the least splendid amongst +these, and she had a curl on her forehead, and a set of Irish diamonds +and Cairngorms, which outshone all the decorations in the house, in her +notion. Her presence used to excruciate Osborne; but go she would upon +all parties of pleasure on which she heard her young friends were bent. +It never entered into her thought but that they must be charmed with +her company. + +"She's been useful to you, my dear," George said to his wife, whom he +could leave alone with less scruple when she had this society. "But +what a comfort it is that Rebecca's come: you will have her for a +friend, and we may get rid now of this damn'd Irishwoman." To this +Amelia did not answer, yes or no: and how do we know what her thoughts +were? + +The coup d'oeil of the Brussels opera-house did not strike Mrs. O'Dowd +as being so fine as the theatre in Fishamble Street, Dublin, nor was +French music at all equal, in her opinion, to the melodies of her +native country. She favoured her friends with these and other opinions +in a very loud tone of voice, and tossed about a great clattering fan +she sported, with the most splendid complacency. + +"Who is that wonderful woman with Amelia, Rawdon, love?" said a lady in +an opposite box (who, almost always civil to her husband in private, +was more fond than ever of him in company). + +"Don't you see that creature with a yellow thing in her turban, and a +red satin gown, and a great watch?" + +"Near the pretty little woman in white?" asked a middle-aged gentleman +seated by the querist's side, with orders in his button, and several +under-waistcoats, and a great, choky, white stock. + +"That pretty woman in white is Amelia, General: you are remarking all +the pretty women, you naughty man." + +"Only one, begad, in the world!" said the General, delighted, and the +lady gave him a tap with a large bouquet which she had. + +"Bedad it's him," said Mrs. O'Dowd; "and that's the very bokay he +bought in the Marshy aux Flures!" and when Rebecca, having caught her +friend's eye, performed the little hand-kissing operation once more, +Mrs. Major O'D., taking the compliment to herself, returned the salute +with a gracious smile, which sent that unfortunate Dobbin shrieking out +of the box again. + +At the end of the act, George was out of the box in a moment, and he +was even going to pay his respects to Rebecca in her loge. He met +Crawley in the lobby, however, where they exchanged a few sentences +upon the occurrences of the last fortnight. + +"You found my cheque all right at the agent's? George said, with a +knowing air. + +"All right, my boy," Rawdon answered. "Happy to give you your revenge. +Governor come round?" + +"Not yet," said George, "but he will; and you know I've some private +fortune through my mother. Has Aunty relented?" + +"Sent me twenty pound, damned old screw. When shall we have a meet? +The General dines out on Tuesday. Can't you come Tuesday? I say, make +Sedley cut off his moustache. What the devil does a civilian mean with +a moustache and those infernal frogs to his coat! By-bye. Try and come +on Tuesday"; and Rawdon was going-off with two brilliant young +gentlemen of fashion, who were, like himself, on the staff of a general +officer. + +George was only half pleased to be asked to dinner on that particular +day when the General was not to dine. "I will go in and pay my +respects to your wife," said he; at which Rawdon said, "Hm, as you +please," looking very glum, and at which the two young officers +exchanged knowing glances. George parted from them and strutted down +the lobby to the General's box, the number of which he had carefully +counted. + +"Entrez," said a clear little voice, and our friend found himself in +Rebecca's presence; who jumped up, clapped her hands together, and held +out both of them to George, so charmed was she to see him. The +General, with the orders in his button, stared at the newcomer with a +sulky scowl, as much as to say, who the devil are you? + +"My dear Captain George!" cried little Rebecca in an ecstasy. "How +good of you to come. The General and I were moping together tete-a-tete. +General, this is my Captain George of whom you heard me talk." + +"Indeed," said the General, with a very small bow; "of what regiment is +Captain George?" + +George mentioned the --th: how he wished he could have said it was a +crack cavalry corps. + +"Come home lately from the West Indies, I believe. Not seen much +service in the late war. Quartered here, Captain George?"--the General +went on with killing haughtiness. + +"Not Captain George, you stupid man; Captain Osborne," Rebecca said. +The General all the while was looking savagely from one to the other. + +"Captain Osborne, indeed! Any relation to the L------ Osbornes?" + +"We bear the same arms," George said, as indeed was the fact; Mr. +Osborne having consulted with a herald in Long Acre, and picked the +L------ arms out of the peerage, when he set up his carriage fifteen +years before. The General made no reply to this announcement; but took +up his opera-glass--the double-barrelled lorgnon was not invented in +those days--and pretended to examine the house; but Rebecca saw that +his disengaged eye was working round in her direction, and shooting out +bloodshot glances at her and George. + +She redoubled in cordiality. "How is dearest Amelia? But I needn't +ask: how pretty she looks! And who is that nice good-natured looking +creature with her--a flame of yours? O, you wicked men! And there is +Mr. Sedley eating ice, I declare: how he seems to enjoy it! General, +why have we not had any ices?" + +"Shall I go and fetch you some?" said the General, bursting with wrath. + +"Let ME go, I entreat you," George said. + +"No, I will go to Amelia's box. Dear, sweet girl! Give me your arm, +Captain George"; and so saying, and with a nod to the General, she +tripped into the lobby. She gave George the queerest, knowingest look, +when they were together, a look which might have been interpreted, +"Don't you see the state of affairs, and what a fool I'm making of +him?" But he did not perceive it. He was thinking of his own plans, +and lost in pompous admiration of his own irresistible powers of +pleasing. + +The curses to which the General gave a low utterance, as soon as +Rebecca and her conqueror had quitted him, were so deep, that I am sure +no compositor would venture to print them were they written down. They +came from the General's heart; and a wonderful thing it is to think +that the human heart is capable of generating such produce, and can +throw out, as occasion demands, such a supply of lust and fury, rage +and hatred. + +Amelia's gentle eyes, too, had been fixed anxiously on the pair, whose +conduct had so chafed the jealous General; but when Rebecca entered her +box, she flew to her friend with an affectionate rapture which showed +itself, in spite of the publicity of the place; for she embraced her +dearest friend in the presence of the whole house, at least in full +view of the General's glass, now brought to bear upon the Osborne +party. Mrs. Rawdon saluted Jos, too, with the kindliest greeting: she +admired Mrs. O'Dowd's large Cairngorm brooch and superb Irish diamonds, +and wouldn't believe that they were not from Golconda direct. She +bustled, she chattered, she turned and twisted, and smiled upon one, +and smirked on another, all in full view of the jealous opera-glass +opposite. And when the time for the ballet came (in which there was no +dancer that went through her grimaces or performed her comedy of action +better), she skipped back to her own box, leaning on Captain Dobbin's +arm this time. No, she would not have George's: he must stay and talk +to his dearest, best, little Amelia. + +"What a humbug that woman is!" honest old Dobbin mumbled to George, +when he came back from Rebecca's box, whither he had conducted her in +perfect silence, and with a countenance as glum as an undertaker's. +"She writhes and twists about like a snake. All the time she was here, +didn't you see, George, how she was acting at the General over the way?" + +"Humbug--acting! Hang it, she's the nicest little woman in England," +George replied, showing his white teeth, and giving his ambrosial +whiskers a twirl. "You ain't a man of the world, Dobbin. Dammy, look +at her now, she's talked over Tufto in no time. Look how he's +laughing! Gad, what a shoulder she has! Emmy, why didn't you have a +bouquet? Everybody has a bouquet." + +"Faith, then, why didn't you BOY one?" Mrs. O'Dowd said; and both +Amelia and William Dobbin thanked her for this timely observation. But +beyond this neither of the ladies rallied. Amelia was overpowered by +the flash and the dazzle and the fashionable talk of her worldly rival. +Even the O'Dowd was silent and subdued after Becky's brilliant +apparition, and scarcely said a word more about Glenmalony all the +evening. + +"When do you intend to give up play, George, as you have promised me, +any time these hundred years?" Dobbin said to his friend a few days +after the night at the Opera. "When do you intend to give up +sermonising?" was the other's reply. "What the deuce, man, are you +alarmed about? We play low; I won last night. You don't suppose +Crawley cheats? With fair play it comes to pretty much the same thing +at the year's end." + +"But I don't think he could pay if he lost," Dobbin said; and his +advice met with the success which advice usually commands. Osborne and +Crawley were repeatedly together now. General Tufto dined abroad +almost constantly. George was always welcome in the apartments (very +close indeed to those of the General) which the aide-de-camp and his +wife occupied in the hotel. + +Amelia's manners were such when she and George visited Crawley and his +wife at these quarters, that they had very nearly come to their first +quarrel; that is, George scolded his wife violently for her evident +unwillingness to go, and the high and mighty manner in which she +comported herself towards Mrs. Crawley, her old friend; and Amelia did +not say one single word in reply; but with her husband's eye upon her, +and Rebecca scanning her as she felt, was, if possible, more bashful +and awkward on the second visit which she paid to Mrs. Rawdon, than on +her first call. + +Rebecca was doubly affectionate, of course, and would not take notice, +in the least, of her friend's coolness. "I think Emmy has become +prouder since her father's name was in the--since Mr. Sedley's +MISFORTUNES," Rebecca said, softening the phrase charitably for +George's ear. + +"Upon my word, I thought when we were at Brighton she was doing me the +honour to be jealous of me; and now I suppose she is scandalised +because Rawdon, and I, and the General live together. Why, my dear +creature, how could we, with our means, live at all, but for a friend +to share expenses? And do you suppose that Rawdon is not big enough to +take care of my honour? But I'm very much obliged to Emmy, very," Mrs. +Rawdon said. + +"Pooh, jealousy!" answered George, "all women are jealous." + +"And all men too. Weren't you jealous of General Tufto, and the +General of you, on the night of the Opera? Why, he was ready to eat me +for going with you to visit that foolish little wife of yours; as if I +care a pin for either of you," Crawley's wife said, with a pert toss of +her head. "Will you dine here? The dragon dines with the +Commander-in-Chief. Great news is stirring. They say the French have +crossed the frontier. We shall have a quiet dinner." + +George accepted the invitation, although his wife was a little ailing. +They were now not quite six weeks married. Another woman was laughing +or sneering at her expense, and he not angry. He was not even angry +with himself, this good-natured fellow. It is a shame, he owned to +himself; but hang it, if a pretty woman WILL throw herself in your way, +why, what can a fellow do, you know? I AM rather free about women, he +had often said, smiling and nodding knowingly to Stubble and Spooney, +and other comrades of the mess-table; and they rather respected him +than otherwise for this prowess. Next to conquering in war, conquering +in love has been a source of pride, time out of mind, amongst men in +Vanity Fair, or how should schoolboys brag of their amours, or Don Juan +be popular? + +So Mr. Osborne, having a firm conviction in his own mind that he was a +woman-killer and destined to conquer, did not run counter to his fate, +but yielded himself up to it quite complacently. And as Emmy did not +say much or plague him with her jealousy, but merely became unhappy and +pined over it miserably in secret, he chose to fancy that she was not +suspicious of what all his acquaintance were perfectly aware--namely, +that he was carrying on a desperate flirtation with Mrs. Crawley. He +rode with her whenever she was free. He pretended regimental business +to Amelia (by which falsehood she was not in the least deceived), and +consigning his wife to solitude or her brother's society, passed his +evenings in the Crawleys' company; losing money to the husband and +flattering himself that the wife was dying of love for him. It is very +likely that this worthy couple never absolutely conspired and agreed +together in so many words: the one to cajole the young gentleman, +whilst the other won his money at cards: but they understood each other +perfectly well, and Rawdon let Osborne come and go with entire good +humour. + +George was so occupied with his new acquaintances that he and William +Dobbin were by no means so much together as formerly. George avoided +him in public and in the regiment, and, as we see, did not like those +sermons which his senior was disposed to inflict upon him. If some +parts of his conduct made Captain Dobbin exceedingly grave and cool; of +what use was it to tell George that, though his whiskers were large, +and his own opinion of his knowingness great, he was as green as a +schoolboy? that Rawdon was making a victim of him as he had done of +many before, and as soon as he had used him would fling him off with +scorn? He would not listen: and so, as Dobbin, upon those days when +he visited the Osborne house, seldom had the advantage of meeting his +old friend, much painful and unavailing talk between them was spared. +Our friend George was in the full career of the pleasures of Vanity +Fair. + +There never was, since the days of Darius, such a brilliant train of +camp-followers as hung round the Duke of Wellington's army in the Low +Countries, in 1815; and led it dancing and feasting, as it were, up to +the very brink of battle. A certain ball which a noble Duchess gave at +Brussels on the 15th of June in the above-named year is historical. +All Brussels had been in a state of excitement about it, and I have +heard from ladies who were in that town at the period, that the talk +and interest of persons of their own sex regarding the ball was much +greater even than in respect of the enemy in their front. The +struggles, intrigues, and prayers to get tickets were such as only +English ladies will employ, in order to gain admission to the society +of the great of their own nation. + +Jos and Mrs. O'Dowd, who were panting to be asked, strove in vain to +procure tickets; but others of our friends were more lucky. For +instance, through the interest of my Lord Bareacres, and as a set-off +for the dinner at the restaurateur's, George got a card for Captain and +Mrs. Osborne; which circumstance greatly elated him. Dobbin, who was a +friend of the General commanding the division in which their regiment +was, came laughing one day to Mrs. Osborne, and displayed a similar +invitation, which made Jos envious, and George wonder how the deuce he +should be getting into society. Mr. and Mrs. Rawdon, finally, were of +course invited; as became the friends of a General commanding a cavalry +brigade. + +On the appointed night, George, having commanded new dresses and +ornaments of all sorts for Amelia, drove to the famous ball, where his +wife did not know a single soul. After looking about for Lady +Bareacres, who cut him, thinking the card was quite enough--and after +placing Amelia on a bench, he left her to her own cogitations there, +thinking, on his own part, that he had behaved very handsomely in +getting her new clothes, and bringing her to the ball, where she was +free to amuse herself as she liked. Her thoughts were not of the +pleasantest, and nobody except honest Dobbin came to disturb them. + +Whilst her appearance was an utter failure (as her husband felt with a +sort of rage), Mrs. Rawdon Crawley's debut was, on the contrary, very +brilliant. She arrived very late. Her face was radiant; her dress +perfection. In the midst of the great persons assembled, and the +eye-glasses directed to her, Rebecca seemed to be as cool and collected +as when she used to marshal Miss Pinkerton's little girls to church. +Numbers of the men she knew already, and the dandies thronged round +her. As for the ladies, it was whispered among them that Rawdon had +run away with her from out of a convent, and that she was a relation of +the Montmorency family. She spoke French so perfectly that there might +be some truth in this report, and it was agreed that her manners were +fine, and her air distingue. Fifty would-be partners thronged round +her at once, and pressed to have the honour to dance with her. But she +said she was engaged, and only going to dance very little; and made her +way at once to the place where Emmy sate quite unnoticed, and dismally +unhappy. And so, to finish the poor child at once, Mrs. Rawdon ran and +greeted affectionately her dearest Amelia, and began forthwith to +patronise her. She found fault with her friend's dress, and her +hairdresser, and wondered how she could be so chaussee, and vowed that +she must send her corsetiere the next morning. She vowed that it was a +delightful ball; that there was everybody that every one knew, and only +a VERY few nobodies in the whole room. It is a fact, that in a +fortnight, and after three dinners in general society, this young woman +had got up the genteel jargon so well, that a native could not speak it +better; and it was only from her French being so good, that you could +know she was not a born woman of fashion. + +George, who had left Emmy on her bench on entering the ball-room, very +soon found his way back when Rebecca was by her dear friend's side. +Becky was just lecturing Mrs. Osborne upon the follies which her +husband was committing. "For God's sake, stop him from gambling, my +dear," she said, "or he will ruin himself. He and Rawdon are playing at +cards every night, and you know he is very poor, and Rawdon will win +every shilling from him if he does not take care. Why don't you +prevent him, you little careless creature? Why don't you come to us of +an evening, instead of moping at home with that Captain Dobbin? I dare +say he is tres aimable; but how could one love a man with feet of such +size? Your husband's feet are darlings--Here he comes. Where have you +been, wretch? Here is Emmy crying her eyes out for you. Are you +coming to fetch me for the quadrille?" And she left her bouquet and +shawl by Amelia's side, and tripped off with George to dance. Women +only know how to wound so. There is a poison on the tips of their +little shafts, which stings a thousand times more than a man's blunter +weapon. Our poor Emmy, who had never hated, never sneered all her +life, was powerless in the hands of her remorseless little enemy. + +George danced with Rebecca twice or thrice--how many times Amelia +scarcely knew. She sat quite unnoticed in her corner, except when +Rawdon came up with some words of clumsy conversation: and later in +the evening, when Captain Dobbin made so bold as to bring her +refreshments and sit beside her. He did not like to ask her why she +was so sad; but as a pretext for the tears which were filling in her +eyes, she told him that Mrs. Crawley had alarmed her by telling her +that George would go on playing. + +"It is curious, when a man is bent upon play, by what clumsy rogues he +will allow himself to be cheated," Dobbin said; and Emmy said, +"Indeed." She was thinking of something else. It was not the loss of +the money that grieved her. + +At last George came back for Rebecca's shawl and flowers. She was +going away. She did not even condescend to come back and say good-bye +to Amelia. The poor girl let her husband come and go without saying a +word, and her head fell on her breast. Dobbin had been called away, +and was whispering deep in conversation with the General of the +division, his friend, and had not seen this last parting. George went +away then with the bouquet; but when he gave it to the owner, there lay +a note, coiled like a snake among the flowers. Rebecca's eye caught it +at once. She had been used to deal with notes in early life. She put +out her hand and took the nosegay. He saw by her eyes as they met, +that she was aware what she should find there. Her husband hurried her +away, still too intent upon his own thoughts, seemingly, to take note +of any marks of recognition which might pass between his friend and his +wife. These were, however, but trifling. Rebecca gave George her hand +with one of her usual quick knowing glances, and made a curtsey and +walked away. George bowed over the hand, said nothing in reply to a +remark of Crawley's, did not hear it even, his brain was so throbbing +with triumph and excitement, and allowed them to go away without a word. + +His wife saw the one part at least of the bouquet-scene. It was quite +natural that George should come at Rebecca's request to get her her +scarf and flowers: it was no more than he had done twenty times before +in the course of the last few days; but now it was too much for her. +"William," she said, suddenly clinging to Dobbin, who was near her, +"you've always been very kind to me--I'm--I'm not well. Take me home." +She did not know she called him by his Christian name, as George was +accustomed to do. He went away with her quickly. Her lodgings were +hard by; and they threaded through the crowd without, where everything +seemed to be more astir than even in the ball-room within. + +George had been angry twice or thrice at finding his wife up on his +return from the parties which he frequented: so she went straight to +bed now; but although she did not sleep, and although the din and +clatter, and the galloping of horsemen were incessant, she never heard +any of these noises, having quite other disturbances to keep her awake. + +Osborne meanwhile, wild with elation, went off to a play-table, and +began to bet frantically. He won repeatedly. "Everything succeeds with +me to-night," he said. But his luck at play even did not cure him of +his restlessness, and he started up after awhile, pocketing his +winnings, and went to a buffet, where he drank off many bumpers of wine. + +Here, as he was rattling away to the people around, laughing loudly and +wild with spirits, Dobbin found him. He had been to the card-tables to +look there for his friend. Dobbin looked as pale and grave as his +comrade was flushed and jovial. + +"Hullo, Dob! Come and drink, old Dob! The Duke's wine is famous. Give +me some more, you sir"; and he held out a trembling glass for the +liquor. + +"Come out, George," said Dobbin, still gravely; "don't drink." + +"Drink! there's nothing like it. Drink yourself, and light up your +lantern jaws, old boy. Here's to you." + +Dobbin went up and whispered something to him, at which George, giving +a start and a wild hurray, tossed off his glass, clapped it on the +table, and walked away speedily on his friend's arm. "The enemy has +passed the Sambre," William said, "and our left is already engaged. +Come away. We are to march in three hours." + +Away went George, his nerves quivering with excitement at the news so +long looked for, so sudden when it came. What were love and intrigue +now? He thought about a thousand things but these in his rapid walk to +his quarters--his past life and future chances--the fate which might be +before him--the wife, the child perhaps, from whom unseen he might be +about to part. Oh, how he wished that night's work undone! and that +with a clear conscience at least he might say farewell to the tender +and guileless being by whose love he had set such little store! + +He thought over his brief married life. In those few weeks he had +frightfully dissipated his little capital. How wild and reckless he +had been! Should any mischance befall him: what was then left for +her? How unworthy he was of her. Why had he married her? He was not +fit for marriage. Why had he disobeyed his father, who had been always +so generous to him? Hope, remorse, ambition, tenderness, and selfish +regret filled his heart. He sate down and wrote to his father, +remembering what he had said once before, when he was engaged to fight +a duel. Dawn faintly streaked the sky as he closed this farewell +letter. He sealed it, and kissed the superscription. He thought how he +had deserted that generous father, and of the thousand kindnesses which +the stern old man had done him. + +He had looked into Amelia's bedroom when he entered; she lay quiet, and +her eyes seemed closed, and he was glad that she was asleep. On +arriving at his quarters from the ball, he had found his regimental +servant already making preparations for his departure: the man had +understood his signal to be still, and these arrangements were very +quickly and silently made. Should he go in and wake Amelia, he +thought, or leave a note for her brother to break the news of departure +to her? He went in to look at her once again. + +She had been awake when he first entered her room, but had kept her +eyes closed, so that even her wakefulness should not seem to reproach +him. But when he had returned, so soon after herself, too, this timid +little heart had felt more at ease, and turning towards him as he stept +softly out of the room, she had fallen into a light sleep. George came +in and looked at her again, entering still more softly. By the pale +night-lamp he could see her sweet, pale face--the purple eyelids were +fringed and closed, and one round arm, smooth and white, lay outside of +the coverlet. Good God! how pure she was; how gentle, how tender, and +how friendless! and he, how selfish, brutal, and black with crime! +Heart-stained, and shame-stricken, he stood at the bed's foot, and +looked at the sleeping girl. How dared he--who was he, to pray for one +so spotless! God bless her! God bless her! He came to the bedside, +and looked at the hand, the little soft hand, lying asleep; and he bent +over the pillow noiselessly towards the gentle pale face. + +Two fair arms closed tenderly round his neck as he stooped down. "I am +awake, George," the poor child said, with a sob fit to break the little +heart that nestled so closely by his own. She was awake, poor soul, +and to what? At that moment a bugle from the Place of Arms began +sounding clearly, and was taken up through the town; and amidst the +drums of the infantry, and the shrill pipes of the Scotch, the whole +city awoke. + + + +CHAPTER XXX + +"The Girl I Left Behind Me" + +We do not claim to rank among the military novelists. Our place is with +the non-combatants. When the decks are cleared for action we go below +and wait meekly. We should only be in the way of the manoeuvres that +the gallant fellows are performing overhead. We shall go no farther +with the --th than to the city gate: and leaving Major O'Dowd to his +duty, come back to the Major's wife, and the ladies and the baggage. + +Now the Major and his lady, who had not been invited to the ball at +which in our last chapter other of our friends figured, had much more +time to take their wholesome natural rest in bed, than was accorded to +people who wished to enjoy pleasure as well as to do duty. "It's my +belief, Peggy, my dear," said he, as he placidly pulled his nightcap +over his ears, "that there will be such a ball danced in a day or two +as some of 'em has never heard the chune of"; and he was much more +happy to retire to rest after partaking of a quiet tumbler, than to +figure at any other sort of amusement. Peggy, for her part, would have +liked to have shown her turban and bird of paradise at the ball, but +for the information which her husband had given her, and which made her +very grave. + +"I'd like ye wake me about half an hour before the assembly beats," the +Major said to his lady. "Call me at half-past one, Peggy dear, and see +me things is ready. May be I'll not come back to breakfast, Mrs. O'D." +With which words, which signified his opinion that the regiment would +march the next morning, the Major ceased talking, and fell asleep. + +Mrs. O'Dowd, the good housewife, arrayed in curl papers and a camisole, +felt that her duty was to act, and not to sleep, at this juncture. +"Time enough for that," she said, "when Mick's gone"; and so she packed +his travelling valise ready for the march, brushed his cloak, his cap, +and other warlike habiliments, set them out in order for him; and +stowed away in the cloak pockets a light package of portable +refreshments, and a wicker-covered flask or pocket-pistol, containing +near a pint of a remarkably sound Cognac brandy, of which she and the +Major approved very much; and as soon as the hands of the "repayther" +pointed to half-past one, and its interior arrangements (it had a tone +quite equal to a cathaydral, its fair owner considered) knelled forth +that fatal hour, Mrs. O'Dowd woke up her Major, and had as comfortable +a cup of coffee prepared for him as any made that morning in Brussels. +And who is there will deny that this worthy lady's preparations +betokened affection as much as the fits of tears and hysterics by which +more sensitive females exhibited their love, and that their partaking +of this coffee, which they drank together while the bugles were +sounding the turn-out and the drums beating in the various quarters of +the town, was not more useful and to the purpose than the outpouring of +any mere sentiment could be? The consequence was, that the Major +appeared on parade quite trim, fresh, and alert, his well-shaved rosy +countenance, as he sate on horseback, giving cheerfulness and +confidence to the whole corps. All the officers saluted her when the +regiment marched by the balcony on which this brave woman stood, and +waved them a cheer as they passed; and I daresay it was not from want +of courage, but from a sense of female delicacy and propriety, that she +refrained from leading the gallant--th personally into action. + +On Sundays, and at periods of a solemn nature, Mrs. O'Dowd used to read +with great gravity out of a large volume of her uncle the Dean's +sermons. It had been of great comfort to her on board the transport as +they were coming home, and were very nearly wrecked, on their return +from the West Indies. After the regiment's departure she betook +herself to this volume for meditation; perhaps she did not understand +much of what she was reading, and her thoughts were elsewhere: but the +sleep project, with poor Mick's nightcap there on the pillow, was quite +a vain one. So it is in the world. Jack or Donald marches away to +glory with his knapsack on his shoulder, stepping out briskly to the +tune of "The Girl I Left Behind Me." It is she who remains and +suffers--and has the leisure to think, and brood, and remember. + +Knowing how useless regrets are, and how the indulgence of sentiment +only serves to make people more miserable, Mrs. Rebecca wisely +determined to give way to no vain feelings of sorrow, and bore the +parting from her husband with quite a Spartan equanimity. Indeed +Captain Rawdon himself was much more affected at the leave-taking than +the resolute little woman to whom he bade farewell. She had mastered +this rude coarse nature; and he loved and worshipped her with all his +faculties of regard and admiration. In all his life he had never been +so happy, as, during the past few months, his wife had made him. All +former delights of turf, mess, hunting-field, and gambling-table; all +previous loves and courtships of milliners, opera-dancers, and the like +easy triumphs of the clumsy military Adonis, were quite insipid when +compared to the lawful matrimonial pleasures which of late he had +enjoyed. She had known perpetually how to divert him; and he had found +his house and her society a thousand times more pleasant than any place +or company which he had ever frequented from his childhood until now. +And he cursed his past follies and extravagances, and bemoaned his vast +outlying debts above all, which must remain for ever as obstacles to +prevent his wife's advancement in the world. He had often groaned over +these in midnight conversations with Rebecca, although as a bachelor +they had never given him any disquiet. He himself was struck with this +phenomenon. "Hang it," he would say (or perhaps use a still stronger +expression out of his simple vocabulary), "before I was married I +didn't care what bills I put my name to, and so long as Moses would +wait or Levy would renew for three months, I kept on never minding. +But since I'm married, except renewing, of course, I give you my honour +I've not touched a bit of stamped paper." + +Rebecca always knew how to conjure away these moods of melancholy. +"Why, my stupid love," she would say, "we have not done with your aunt +yet. If she fails us, isn't there what you call the Gazette? or, stop, +when your uncle Bute's life drops, I have another scheme. The living +has always belonged to the younger brother, and why shouldn't you sell +out and go into the Church?" The idea of this conversion set Rawdon +into roars of laughter: you might have heard the explosion through the +hotel at midnight, and the haw-haws of the great dragoon's voice. +General Tufto heard him from his quarters on the first floor above +them; and Rebecca acted the scene with great spirit, and preached +Rawdon's first sermon, to the immense delight of the General at +breakfast. + +But these were mere by-gone days and talk. When the final news arrived +that the campaign was opened, and the troops were to march, Rawdon's +gravity became such that Becky rallied him about it in a manner which +rather hurt the feelings of the Guardsman. "You don't suppose I'm +afraid, Becky, I should think," he said, with a tremor in his voice. +"But I'm a pretty good mark for a shot, and you see if it brings me +down, why I leave one and perhaps two behind me whom I should wish to +provide for, as I brought 'em into the scrape. It is no laughing +matter that, Mrs. C., anyways." + +Rebecca by a hundred caresses and kind words tried to soothe the +feelings of the wounded lover. It was only when her vivacity and sense +of humour got the better of this sprightly creature (as they would do +under most circumstances of life indeed) that she would break out with +her satire, but she could soon put on a demure face. "Dearest love," +she said, "do you suppose I feel nothing?" and hastily dashing +something from her eyes, she looked up in her husband's face with a +smile. + +"Look here," said he. "If I drop, let us see what there is for you. I +have had a pretty good run of luck here, and here's two hundred and +thirty pounds. I have got ten Napoleons in my pocket. That is as much +as I shall want; for the General pays everything like a prince; and if +I'm hit, why you know I cost nothing. Don't cry, little woman; I may +live to vex you yet. Well, I shan't take either of my horses, but +shall ride the General's grey charger: it's cheaper, and I told him +mine was lame. If I'm done, those two ought to fetch you something. +Grigg offered ninety for the mare yesterday, before this confounded +news came, and like a fool I wouldn't let her go under the two o's. +Bullfinch will fetch his price any day, only you'd better sell him in +this country, because the dealers have so many bills of mine, and so +I'd rather he shouldn't go back to England. Your little mare the +General gave you will fetch something, and there's no d--d livery +stable bills here as there are in London," Rawdon added, with a laugh. +"There's that dressing-case cost me two hundred--that is, I owe two for +it; and the gold tops and bottles must be worth thirty or forty. +Please to put THAT up the spout, ma'am, with my pins, and rings, and +watch and chain, and things. They cost a precious lot of money. Miss +Crawley, I know, paid a hundred down for the chain and ticker. Gold +tops and bottles, indeed! dammy, I'm sorry I didn't take more now. +Edwards pressed on me a silver-gilt boot-jack, and I might have had a +dressing-case fitted up with a silver warming-pan, and a service of +plate. But we must make the best of what we've got, Becky, you know." + +And so, making his last dispositions, Captain Crawley, who had seldom +thought about anything but himself, until the last few months of his +life, when Love had obtained the mastery over the dragoon, went through +the various items of his little catalogue of effects, striving to see +how they might be turned into money for his wife's benefit, in case any +accident should befall him. He pleased himself by noting down with a +pencil, in his big schoolboy handwriting, the various items of his +portable property which might be sold for his widow's advantage as, for +example, "My double-barril by Manton, say 40 guineas; my driving cloak, +lined with sable fur, 50 pounds; my duelling pistols in rosewood case +(same which I shot Captain Marker), 20 pounds; my regulation +saddle-holsters and housings; my Laurie ditto," and so forth, over all +of which articles he made Rebecca the mistress. + +Faithful to his plan of economy, the Captain dressed himself in his +oldest and shabbiest uniform and epaulets, leaving the newest behind, +under his wife's (or it might be his widow's) guardianship. And this +famous dandy of Windsor and Hyde Park went off on his campaign with a +kit as modest as that of a sergeant, and with something like a prayer +on his lips for the woman he was leaving. He took her up from the +ground, and held her in his arms for a minute, tight pressed against +his strong-beating heart. His face was purple and his eyes dim, as he +put her down and left her. He rode by his General's side, and smoked +his cigar in silence as they hastened after the troops of the General's +brigade, which preceded them; and it was not until they were some miles +on their way that he left off twirling his moustache and broke silence. + +And Rebecca, as we have said, wisely determined not to give way to +unavailing sentimentality on her husband's departure. She waved him an +adieu from the window, and stood there for a moment looking out after +he was gone. The cathedral towers and the full gables of the quaint old +houses were just beginning to blush in the sunrise. There had been no +rest for her that night. She was still in her pretty ball-dress, her +fair hair hanging somewhat out of curl on her neck, and the circles +round her eyes dark with watching. "What a fright I seem," she said, +examining herself in the glass, "and how pale this pink makes one +look!" So she divested herself of this pink raiment; in doing which a +note fell out from her corsage, which she picked up with a smile, and +locked into her dressing-box. And then she put her bouquet of the ball +into a glass of water, and went to bed, and slept very comfortably. + +The town was quite quiet when she woke up at ten o'clock, and partook +of coffee, very requisite and comforting after the exhaustion and grief +of the morning's occurrences. + +This meal over, she resumed honest Rawdon's calculations of the night +previous, and surveyed her position. Should the worst befall, all +things considered, she was pretty well to do. There were her own +trinkets and trousseau, in addition to those which her husband had left +behind. Rawdon's generosity, when they were first married, has already +been described and lauded. Besides these, and the little mare, the +General, her slave and worshipper, had made her many very handsome +presents, in the shape of cashmere shawls bought at the auction of a +bankrupt French general's lady, and numerous tributes from the +jewellers' shops, all of which betokened her admirer's taste and +wealth. As for "tickers," as poor Rawdon called watches, her +apartments were alive with their clicking. For, happening to mention +one night that hers, which Rawdon had given to her, was of English +workmanship, and went ill, on the very next morning there came to her a +little bijou marked Leroy, with a chain and cover charmingly set with +turquoises, and another signed Brequet, which was covered with pearls, +and yet scarcely bigger than a half-crown. General Tufto had bought +one, and Captain Osborne had gallantly presented the other. Mrs. +Osborne had no watch, though, to do George justice, she might have had +one for the asking, and the Honourable Mrs. Tufto in England had an old +instrument of her mother's that might have served for the plate-warming +pan which Rawdon talked about. If Messrs. Howell and James were to +publish a list of the purchasers of all the trinkets which they sell, +how surprised would some families be: and if all these ornaments went +to gentlemen's lawful wives and daughters, what a profusion of +jewellery there would be exhibited in the genteelest homes of Vanity +Fair! + +Every calculation made of these valuables Mrs. Rebecca found, not +without a pungent feeling of triumph and self-satisfaction, that should +circumstances occur, she might reckon on six or seven hundred pounds at +the very least, to begin the world with; and she passed the morning +disposing, ordering, looking out, and locking up her properties in the +most agreeable manner. Among the notes in Rawdon's pocket-book was a +draft for twenty pounds on Osborne's banker. This made her think about +Mrs. Osborne. "I will go and get the draft cashed," she said, "and pay +a visit afterwards to poor little Emmy." If this is a novel without a +hero, at least let us lay claim to a heroine. No man in the British +army which has marched away, not the great Duke himself, could be more +cool or collected in the presence of doubts and difficulties, than the +indomitable little aide-de-camp's wife. + +And there was another of our acquaintances who was also to be left +behind, a non-combatant, and whose emotions and behaviour we have +therefore a right to know. This was our friend the ex-collector of +Boggley Wollah, whose rest was broken, like other people's, by the +sounding of the bugles in the early morning. Being a great sleeper, +and fond of his bed, it is possible he would have snoozed on until his +usual hour of rising in the forenoon, in spite of all the drums, +bugles, and bagpipes in the British army, but for an interruption, +which did not come from George Osborne, who shared Jos's quarters with +him, and was as usual occupied too much with his own affairs or with +grief at parting with his wife, to think of taking leave of his +slumbering brother-in-law--it was not George, we say, who interposed +between Jos Sedley and sleep, but Captain Dobbin, who came and roused +him up, insisting on shaking hands with him before his departure. + +"Very kind of you," said Jos, yawning, and wishing the Captain at the +deuce. + +"I--I didn't like to go off without saying good-bye, you know," Dobbin +said in a very incoherent manner; "because you know some of us mayn't +come back again, and I like to see you all well, and--and that sort of +thing, you know." + +"What do you mean?" Jos asked, rubbing his eyes. The Captain did not +in the least hear him or look at the stout gentleman in the nightcap, +about whom he professed to have such a tender interest. The hypocrite +was looking and listening with all his might in the direction of +George's apartments, striding about the room, upsetting the chairs, +beating the tattoo, biting his nails, and showing other signs of great +inward emotion. + +Jos had always had rather a mean opinion of the Captain, and now began +to think his courage was somewhat equivocal. "What is it I can do for +you, Dobbin?" he said, in a sarcastic tone. + +"I tell you what you can do," the Captain replied, coming up to the +bed; "we march in a quarter of an hour, Sedley, and neither George nor +I may ever come back. Mind you, you are not to stir from this town +until you ascertain how things go. You are to stay here and watch over +your sister, and comfort her, and see that no harm comes to her. If +anything happens to George, remember she has no one but you in the +world to look to. If it goes wrong with the army, you'll see her safe +back to England; and you will promise me on your word that you will +never desert her. I know you won't: as far as money goes, you were +always free enough with that. Do you want any? I mean, have you enough +gold to take you back to England in case of a misfortune?" + +"Sir," said Jos, majestically, "when I want money, I know where to ask +for it. And as for my sister, you needn't tell me how I ought to +behave to her." + +"You speak like a man of spirit, Jos," the other answered good-naturedly, +"and I am glad that George can leave her in such good hands. +So I may give him your word of honour, may I, that in case of extremity +you will stand by her?" + +"Of course, of course," answered Mr. Jos, whose generosity in money +matters Dobbin estimated quite correctly. + +"And you'll see her safe out of Brussels in the event of a defeat?" + +"A defeat! D---- it, sir, it's impossible. Don't try and frighten ME," +the hero cried from his bed; and Dobbin's mind was thus perfectly set +at ease now that Jos had spoken out so resolutely respecting his +conduct to his sister. "At least," thought the Captain, "there will be +a retreat secured for her in case the worst should ensue." + +If Captain Dobbin expected to get any personal comfort and satisfaction +from having one more view of Amelia before the regiment marched away, +his selfishness was punished just as such odious egotism deserved to +be. The door of Jos's bedroom opened into the sitting-room which was +common to the family party, and opposite this door was that of Amelia's +chamber. The bugles had wakened everybody: there was no use in +concealment now. George's servant was packing in this room: Osborne +coming in and out of the contiguous bedroom, flinging to the man such +articles as he thought fit to carry on the campaign. And presently +Dobbin had the opportunity which his heart coveted, and he got sight of +Amelia's face once more. But what a face it was! So white, so wild +and despair-stricken, that the remembrance of it haunted him afterwards +like a crime, and the sight smote him with inexpressible pangs of +longing and pity. + +She was wrapped in a white morning dress, her hair falling on her +shoulders, and her large eyes fixed and without light. By way of +helping on the preparations for the departure, and showing that she too +could be useful at a moment so critical, this poor soul had taken up a +sash of George's from the drawers whereon it lay, and followed him to +and fro with the sash in her hand, looking on mutely as his packing +proceeded. She came out and stood, leaning at the wall, holding this +sash against her bosom, from which the heavy net of crimson dropped +like a large stain of blood. Our gentle-hearted Captain felt a guilty +shock as he looked at her. "Good God," thought he, "and is it grief +like this I dared to pry into?" And there was no help: no means to +soothe and comfort this helpless, speechless misery. He stood for a +moment and looked at her, powerless and torn with pity, as a parent +regards an infant in pain. + +At last, George took Emmy's hand, and led her back into the bedroom, +from whence he came out alone. The parting had taken place in that +moment, and he was gone. + +"Thank Heaven that is over," George thought, bounding down the stair, +his sword under his arm, as he ran swiftly to the alarm ground, where +the regiment was mustered, and whither trooped men and officers +hurrying from their billets; his pulse was throbbing and his cheeks +flushed: the great game of war was going to be played, and he one of +the players. What a fierce excitement of doubt, hope, and pleasure! +What tremendous hazards of loss or gain! What were all the games of +chance he had ever played compared to this one? Into all contests +requiring athletic skill and courage, the young man, from his boyhood +upwards, had flung himself with all his might. The champion of his +school and his regiment, the bravos of his companions had followed him +everywhere; from the boys' cricket-match to the garrison-races, he had +won a hundred of triumphs; and wherever he went women and men had +admired and envied him. What qualities are there for which a man gets +so speedy a return of applause, as those of bodily superiority, +activity, and valour? Time out of mind strength and courage have been +the theme of bards and romances; and from the story of Troy down to +to-day, poetry has always chosen a soldier for a hero. I wonder is it +because men are cowards in heart that they admire bravery so much, and +place military valour so far beyond every other quality for reward and +worship? + +So, at the sound of that stirring call to battle, George jumped away +from the gentle arms in which he had been dallying; not without a +feeling of shame (although his wife's hold on him had been but feeble), +that he should have been detained there so long. The same feeling of +eagerness and excitement was amongst all those friends of his of whom +we have had occasional glimpses, from the stout senior Major, who led +the regiment into action, to little Stubble, the Ensign, who was to +bear its colours on that day. + +The sun was just rising as the march began--it was a gallant sight--the +band led the column, playing the regimental march--then came the +Major in command, riding upon Pyramus, his stout charger--then marched +the grenadiers, their Captain at their head; in the centre were the +colours, borne by the senior and junior Ensigns--then George came +marching at the head of his company. He looked up, and smiled at +Amelia, and passed on; and even the sound of the music died away. + + + +CHAPTER XXXI + +In Which Jos Sedley Takes Care of His Sister + +Thus all the superior officers being summoned on duty elsewhere, Jos +Sedley was left in command of the little colony at Brussels, with +Amelia invalided, Isidor, his Belgian servant, and the bonne, who was +maid-of-all-work for the establishment, as a garrison under him. Though +he was disturbed in spirit, and his rest destroyed by Dobbin's +interruption and the occurrences of the morning, Jos nevertheless +remained for many hours in bed, wakeful and rolling about there until +his usual hour of rising had arrived. The sun was high in the heavens, +and our gallant friends of the --th miles on their march, before the +civilian appeared in his flowered dressing-gown at breakfast. + +About George's absence, his brother-in-law was very easy in mind. +Perhaps Jos was rather pleased in his heart that Osborne was gone, for +during George's presence, the other had played but a very secondary +part in the household, and Osborne did not scruple to show his contempt +for the stout civilian. But Emmy had always been good and attentive to +him. It was she who ministered to his comforts, who superintended the +dishes that he liked, who walked or rode with him (as she had many, too +many, opportunities of doing, for where was George?) and who interposed +her sweet face between his anger and her husband's scorn. Many timid +remonstrances had she uttered to George in behalf of her brother, but +the former in his trenchant way cut these entreaties short. "I'm an +honest man," he said, "and if I have a feeling I show it, as an honest +man will. How the deuce, my dear, would you have me behave +respectfully to such a fool as your brother?" So Jos was pleased with +George's absence. His plain hat, and gloves on a sideboard, and the +idea that the owner was away, caused Jos I don't know what secret +thrill of pleasure. "HE won't be troubling me this morning," Jos +thought, "with his dandified airs and his impudence." + +"Put the Captain's hat into the ante-room," he said to Isidor, the +servant. + +"Perhaps he won't want it again," replied the lackey, looking knowingly +at his master. He hated George too, whose insolence towards him was +quite of the English sort. + +"And ask if Madame is coming to breakfast," Mr. Sedley said with great +majesty, ashamed to enter with a servant upon the subject of his +dislike for George. The truth is, he had abused his brother to the +valet a score of times before. + +Alas! Madame could not come to breakfast, and cut the tartines that +Mr. Jos liked. Madame was a great deal too ill, and had been in a +frightful state ever since her husband's departure, so her bonne said. +Jos showed his sympathy by pouring her out a large cup of tea It was +his way of exhibiting kindness: and he improved on this; he not only +sent her breakfast, but he bethought him what delicacies she would most +like for dinner. + +Isidor, the valet, had looked on very sulkily, while Osborne's servant +was disposing of his master's baggage previous to the Captain's +departure: for in the first place he hated Mr. Osborne, whose conduct +to him, and to all inferiors, was generally overbearing (nor does the +continental domestic like to be treated with insolence as our own +better-tempered servants do), and secondly, he was angry that so many +valuables should be removed from under his hands, to fall into other +people's possession when the English discomfiture should arrive. Of +this defeat he and a vast number of other persons in Brussels and +Belgium did not make the slightest doubt. The almost universal belief +was, that the Emperor would divide the Prussian and English armies, +annihilate one after the other, and march into Brussels before three +days were over: when all the movables of his present masters, who would +be killed, or fugitives, or prisoners, would lawfully become the +property of Monsieur Isidor. + +As he helped Jos through his toilsome and complicated daily toilette, +this faithful servant would calculate what he should do with the very +articles with which he was decorating his master's person. He would +make a present of the silver essence-bottles and toilet knicknacks to a +young lady of whom he was fond; and keep the English cutlery and the +large ruby pin for himself. It would look very smart upon one of the +fine frilled shirts, which, with the gold-laced cap and the frogged +frock coat, that might easily be cut down to suit his shape, and the +Captain's gold-headed cane, and the great double ring with the rubies, +which he would have made into a pair of beautiful earrings, he +calculated would make a perfect Adonis of himself, and render +Mademoiselle Reine an easy prey. "How those sleeve-buttons will suit +me!" thought he, as he fixed a pair on the fat pudgy wrists of Mr. +Sedley. "I long for sleeve-buttons; and the Captain's boots with brass +spurs, in the next room, corbleu! what an effect they will make in the +Allee Verte!" So while Monsieur Isidor with bodily fingers was holding +on to his master's nose, and shaving the lower part of Jos's face, his +imagination was rambling along the Green Avenue, dressed out in a +frogged coat and lace, and in company with Mademoiselle Reine; he was +loitering in spirit on the banks, and examining the barges sailing +slowly under the cool shadows of the trees by the canal, or refreshing +himself with a mug of Faro at the bench of a beer-house on the road to +Laeken. + +But Mr. Joseph Sedley, luckily for his own peace, no more knew what was +passing in his domestic's mind than the respected reader, and I suspect +what John or Mary, whose wages we pay, think of ourselves. What our +servants think of us!--Did we know what our intimates and dear +relations thought of us, we should live in a world that we should be +glad to quit, and in a frame of mind and a constant terror, that would +be perfectly unbearable. So Jos's man was marking his victim down, as +you see one of Mr. Paynter's assistants in Leadenhall Street ornament +an unconscious turtle with a placard on which is written, "Soup +to-morrow." + +Amelia's attendant was much less selfishly disposed. Few dependents +could come near that kind and gentle creature without paying their +usual tribute of loyalty and affection to her sweet and affectionate +nature. And it is a fact that Pauline, the cook, consoled her mistress +more than anybody whom she saw on this wretched morning; for when she +found how Amelia remained for hours, silent, motionless, and haggard, +by the windows in which she had placed herself to watch the last +bayonets of the column as it marched away, the honest girl took the +lady's hand, and said, Tenez, Madame, est-ce qu'il n'est pas aussi a +l'armee, mon homme a moi? with which she burst into tears, and Amelia +falling into her arms, did likewise, and so each pitied and soothed the +other. + +Several times during the forenoon Mr. Jos's Isidor went from his +lodgings into the town, and to the gates of the hotels and lodging-houses +round about the Parc, where the English were congregated, and +there mingled with other valets, couriers, and lackeys, gathered such +news as was abroad, and brought back bulletins for his master's +information. Almost all these gentlemen were in heart partisans of the +Emperor, and had their opinions about the speedy end of the campaign. +The Emperor's proclamation from Avesnes had been distributed everywhere +plentifully in Brussels. "Soldiers!" it said, "this is the +anniversary of Marengo and Friedland, by which the destinies of Europe +were twice decided. Then, as after Austerlitz, as after Wagram, we +were too generous. We believed in the oaths and promises of princes +whom we suffered to remain upon their thrones. Let us march once more +to meet them. We and they, are we not still the same men? Soldiers! +these same Prussians who are so arrogant to-day, were three to one +against you at Jena, and six to one at Montmirail. Those among you who +were prisoners in England can tell their comrades what frightful +torments they suffered on board the English hulks. Madmen! a moment +of prosperity has blinded them, and if they enter into France it will +be to find a grave there!" But the partisans of the French prophesied +a more speedy extermination of the Emperor's enemies than this; and it +was agreed on all hands that Prussians and British would never return +except as prisoners in the rear of the conquering army. + +These opinions in the course of the day were brought to operate upon +Mr. Sedley. He was told that the Duke of Wellington had gone to try +and rally his army, the advance of which had been utterly crushed the +night before. + +"Crushed, psha!" said Jos, whose heart was pretty stout at +breakfast-time. "The Duke has gone to beat the Emperor as he has +beaten all his generals before." + +"His papers are burned, his effects are removed, and his quarters are +being got ready for the Duke of Dalmatia," Jos's informant replied. "I +had it from his own maitre d'hotel. Milor Duc de Richemont's people +are packing up everything. His Grace has fled already, and the Duchess +is only waiting to see the plate packed to join the King of France at +Ostend." + +"The King of France is at Ghent, fellow," replied Jos, affecting +incredulity. + +"He fled last night to Bruges, and embarks today from Ostend. The Duc +de Berri is taken prisoner. Those who wish to be safe had better go +soon, for the dykes will be opened to-morrow, and who can fly when the +whole country is under water?" + +"Nonsense, sir, we are three to one, sir, against any force Boney can +bring into the field," Mr. Sedley objected; "the Austrians and the +Russians are on their march. He must, he shall be crushed," Jos said, +slapping his hand on the table. + +"The Prussians were three to one at Jena, and he took their army and +kingdom in a week. They were six to one at Montmirail, and he +scattered them like sheep. The Austrian army is coming, but with the +Empress and the King of Rome at its head; and the Russians, bah! the +Russians will withdraw. No quarter is to be given to the English, on +account of their cruelty to our braves on board the infamous pontoons. +Look here, here it is in black and white. Here's the proclamation of +his Majesty the Emperor and King," said the now declared partisan of +Napoleon, and taking the document from his pocket, Isidor sternly +thrust it into his master's face, and already looked upon the frogged +coat and valuables as his own spoil. + +Jos was, if not seriously alarmed as yet, at least considerably +disturbed in mind. "Give me my coat and cap, sir," said he, "and follow +me. I will go myself and learn the truth of these reports." Isidor was +furious as Jos put on the braided frock. "Milor had better not wear +that military coat," said he; "the Frenchmen have sworn not to give +quarter to a single British soldier." + +"Silence, sirrah!" said Jos, with a resolute countenance still, and +thrust his arm into the sleeve with indomitable resolution, in the +performance of which heroic act he was found by Mrs. Rawdon Crawley, +who at this juncture came up to visit Amelia, and entered without +ringing at the antechamber door. + +Rebecca was dressed very neatly and smartly, as usual: her quiet sleep +after Rawdon's departure had refreshed her, and her pink smiling cheeks +were quite pleasant to look at, in a town and on a day when everybody +else's countenance wore the appearance of the deepest anxiety and +gloom. She laughed at the attitude in which Jos was discovered, and +the struggles and convulsions with which the stout gentleman thrust +himself into the braided coat. + +"Are you preparing to join the army, Mr. Joseph?" she said. "Is there +to be nobody left in Brussels to protect us poor women?" Jos succeeded +in plunging into the coat, and came forward blushing and stuttering out +excuses to his fair visitor. "How was she after the events of the +morning--after the fatigues of the ball the night before?" Monsieur +Isidor disappeared into his master's adjacent bedroom, bearing off the +flowered dressing-gown. + +"How good of you to ask," said she, pressing one of his hands in both +her own. "How cool and collected you look when everybody else is +frightened! How is our dear little Emmy? It must have been an awful, +awful parting." + +"Tremendous," Jos said. + +"You men can bear anything," replied the lady. "Parting or danger are +nothing to you. Own now that you were going to join the army and leave +us to our fate. I know you were--something tells me you were. I was so +frightened, when the thought came into my head (for I do sometimes +think of you when I am alone, Mr. Joseph), that I ran off immediately +to beg and entreat you not to fly from us." + +This speech might be interpreted, "My dear sir, should an accident +befall the army, and a retreat be necessary, you have a very +comfortable carriage, in which I propose to take a seat." I don't know +whether Jos understood the words in this sense. But he was profoundly +mortified by the lady's inattention to him during their stay at +Brussels. He had never been presented to any of Rawdon Crawley's great +acquaintances: he had scarcely been invited to Rebecca's parties; for +he was too timid to play much, and his presence bored George and Rawdon +equally, who neither of them, perhaps, liked to have a witness of the +amusements in which the pair chose to indulge. "Ah!" thought Jos, "now +she wants me she comes to me. When there is nobody else in the way she +can think about old Joseph Sedley!" But besides these doubts he felt +flattered at the idea Rebecca expressed of his courage. + +He blushed a good deal, and put on an air of importance. "I should like +to see the action," he said. "Every man of any spirit would, you know. +I've seen a little service in India, but nothing on this grand scale." + +"You men would sacrifice anything for a pleasure," Rebecca answered. +"Captain Crawley left me this morning as gay as if he were going to a +hunting party. What does he care? What do any of you care for the +agonies and tortures of a poor forsaken woman? (I wonder whether he +could really have been going to the troops, this great lazy gourmand?) +Oh! dear Mr. Sedley, I have come to you for comfort--for consolation. +I have been on my knees all the morning. I tremble at the frightful +danger into which our husbands, our friends, our brave troops and +allies, are rushing. And I come here for shelter, and find another of +my friends--the last remaining to me--bent upon plunging into the +dreadful scene!" + +"My dear madam," Jos replied, now beginning to be quite soothed, "don't +be alarmed. I only said I should like to go--what Briton would not? +But my duty keeps me here: I can't leave that poor creature in the +next room." And he pointed with his finger to the door of the chamber +in which Amelia was. + +"Good noble brother!" Rebecca said, putting her handkerchief to her +eyes, and smelling the eau-de-cologne with which it was scented. "I +have done you injustice: you have got a heart. I thought you had not." + +"O, upon my honour!" Jos said, making a motion as if he would lay his +hand upon the spot in question. "You do me injustice, indeed you +do--my dear Mrs. Crawley." + +"I do, now your heart is true to your sister. But I remember two years +ago--when it was false to me!" Rebecca said, fixing her eyes upon him +for an instant, and then turning away into the window. + +Jos blushed violently. That organ which he was accused by Rebecca of +not possessing began to thump tumultuously. He recalled the days when +he had fled from her, and the passion which had once inflamed him--the +days when he had driven her in his curricle: when she had knit the +green purse for him: when he had sate enraptured gazing at her white +arms and bright eyes. + +"I know you think me ungrateful," Rebecca continued, coming out of the +window, and once more looking at him and addressing him in a low +tremulous voice. "Your coldness, your averted looks, your manner when +we have met of late--when I came in just now, all proved it to me. But +were there no reasons why I should avoid you? Let your own heart answer +that question. Do you think my husband was too much inclined to +welcome you? The only unkind words I have ever had from him (I will do +Captain Crawley that justice) have been about you--and most cruel, +cruel words they were." + +"Good gracious! what have I done?" asked Jos in a flurry of pleasure +and perplexity; "what have I done--to--to--?" + +"Is jealousy nothing?" said Rebecca. "He makes me miserable about you. +And whatever it might have been once--my heart is all his. I am +innocent now. Am I not, Mr. Sedley?" + +All Jos's blood tingled with delight, as he surveyed this victim to his +attractions. A few adroit words, one or two knowing tender glances of +the eyes, and his heart was inflamed again and his doubts and +suspicions forgotten. From Solomon downwards, have not wiser men than +he been cajoled and befooled by women? "If the worst comes to the +worst," Becky thought, "my retreat is secure; and I have a right-hand +seat in the barouche." + +There is no knowing into what declarations of love and ardour the +tumultuous passions of Mr. Joseph might have led him, if Isidor the +valet had not made his reappearance at this minute, and begun to busy +himself about the domestic affairs. Jos, who was just going to gasp +out an avowal, choked almost with the emotion that he was obliged to +restrain. Rebecca too bethought her that it was time she should go in +and comfort her dearest Amelia. "Au revoir," she said, kissing her +hand to Mr. Joseph, and tapped gently at the door of his sister's +apartment. As she entered and closed the door on herself, he sank down +in a chair, and gazed and sighed and puffed portentously. "That coat +is very tight for Milor," Isidor said, still having his eye on the +frogs; but his master heard him not: his thoughts were elsewhere: now +glowing, maddening, upon the contemplation of the enchanting Rebecca: +anon shrinking guiltily before the vision of the jealous Rawdon +Crawley, with his curling, fierce mustachios, and his terrible duelling +pistols loaded and cocked. + +Rebecca's appearance struck Amelia with terror, and made her shrink +back. It recalled her to the world and the remembrance of yesterday. +In the overpowering fears about to-morrow she had forgotten +Rebecca--jealousy--everything except that her husband was gone and was +in danger. Until this dauntless worldling came in and broke the spell, +and lifted the latch, we too have forborne to enter into that sad +chamber. How long had that poor girl been on her knees! what hours of +speechless prayer and bitter prostration had she passed there! The +war-chroniclers who write brilliant stories of fight and triumph +scarcely tell us of these. These are too mean parts of the pageant: +and you don't hear widows' cries or mothers' sobs in the midst of the +shouts and jubilation in the great Chorus of Victory. And yet when was +the time that such have not cried out: heart-broken, humble +protestants, unheard in the uproar of the triumph! + +After the first movement of terror in Amelia's mind--when Rebecca's +green eyes lighted upon her, and rustling in her fresh silks and +brilliant ornaments, the latter tripped up with extended arms to +embrace her--a feeling of anger succeeded, and from being deadly pale +before, her face flushed up red, and she returned Rebecca's look after +a moment with a steadiness which surprised and somewhat abashed her +rival. + +"Dearest Amelia, you are very unwell," the visitor said, putting forth +her hand to take Amelia's. "What is it? I could not rest until I knew +how you were." + +Amelia drew back her hand--never since her life began had that gentle +soul refused to believe or to answer any demonstration of good-will or +affection. But she drew back her hand, and trembled all over. "Why +are you here, Rebecca?" she said, still looking at her solemnly with +her large eyes. These glances troubled her visitor. + +"She must have seen him give me the letter at the ball," Rebecca +thought. "Don't be agitated, dear Amelia," she said, looking down. "I +came but to see if I could--if you were well." + +"Are you well?" said Amelia. "I dare say you are. You don't love your +husband. You would not be here if you did. Tell me, Rebecca, did I +ever do you anything but kindness?" + +"Indeed, Amelia, no," the other said, still hanging down her head. + +"When you were quite poor, who was it that befriended you? Was I not a +sister to you? You saw us all in happier days before he married me. I +was all in all then to him; or would he have given up his fortune, his +family, as he nobly did to make me happy? Why did you come between my +love and me? Who sent you to separate those whom God joined, and take +my darling's heart from me--my own husband? Do you think you could +love him as I did? His love was everything to me. You knew it, and +wanted to rob me of it. For shame, Rebecca; bad and wicked +woman--false friend and false wife." + +"Amelia, I protest before God, I have done my husband no wrong," +Rebecca said, turning from her. + +"Have you done me no wrong, Rebecca? You did not succeed, but you +tried. Ask your heart if you did not." + +She knows nothing, Rebecca thought. + +"He came back to me. I knew he would. I knew that no falsehood, no +flattery, could keep him from me long. I knew he would come. I prayed +so that he should." + +The poor girl spoke these words with a spirit and volubility which +Rebecca had never before seen in her, and before which the latter was +quite dumb. "But what have I done to you," she continued in a more +pitiful tone, "that you should try and take him from me? I had him but +for six weeks. You might have spared me those, Rebecca. And yet, from +the very first day of our wedding, you came and blighted it. Now he is +gone, are you come to see how unhappy I am?" she continued. "You made +me wretched enough for the past fortnight: you might have spared me +to-day." + +"I--I never came here," interposed Rebecca, with unlucky truth. + +"No. You didn't come. You took him away. Are you come to fetch him +from me?" she continued in a wilder tone. "He was here, but he is gone +now. There on that very sofa he sate. Don't touch it. We sate and +talked there. I was on his knee, and my arms were round his neck, and +we said 'Our Father.' Yes, he was here: and they came and took him +away, but he promised me to come back." + +"He will come back, my dear," said Rebecca, touched in spite of herself. + +"Look," said Amelia, "this is his sash--isn't it a pretty colour?" and +she took up the fringe and kissed it. She had tied it round her waist +at some part of the day. She had forgotten her anger, her jealousy, +the very presence of her rival seemingly. For she walked silently and +almost with a smile on her face, towards the bed, and began to smooth +down George's pillow. + +Rebecca walked, too, silently away. "How is Amelia?" asked Jos, who +still held his position in the chair. + +"There should be somebody with her," said Rebecca. "I think she is very +unwell": and she went away with a very grave face, refusing Mr. +Sedley's entreaties that she would stay and partake of the early dinner +which he had ordered. + +Rebecca was of a good-natured and obliging disposition; and she liked +Amelia rather than otherwise. Even her hard words, reproachful as they +were, were complimentary--the groans of a person stinging under defeat. +Meeting Mrs. O'Dowd, whom the Dean's sermons had by no means comforted, +and who was walking very disconsolately in the Parc, Rebecca accosted +the latter, rather to the surprise of the Major's wife, who was not +accustomed to such marks of politeness from Mrs. Rawdon Crawley, and +informing her that poor little Mrs. Osborne was in a desperate +condition, and almost mad with grief, sent off the good-natured +Irishwoman straight to see if she could console her young favourite. + +"I've cares of my own enough," Mrs. O'Dowd said, gravely, "and I +thought poor Amelia would be little wanting for company this day. But +if she's so bad as you say, and you can't attend to her, who used to be +so fond of her, faith I'll see if I can be of service. And so good +marning to ye, Madam"; with which speech and a toss of her head, the +lady of the repayther took a farewell of Mrs. Crawley, whose company +she by no means courted. + +Becky watched her marching off, with a smile on her lip. She had the +keenest sense of humour, and the Parthian look which the retreating +Mrs. O'Dowd flung over her shoulder almost upset Mrs. Crawley's +gravity. "My service to ye, me fine Madam, and I'm glad to see ye so +cheerful," thought Peggy. "It's not YOU that will cry your eyes out +with grief, anyway." And with this she passed on, and speedily found +her way to Mrs. Osborne's lodgings. + +The poor soul was still at the bedside, where Rebecca had left her, and +stood almost crazy with grief. The Major's wife, a stronger-minded +woman, endeavoured her best to comfort her young friend. "You must bear +up, Amelia, dear," she said kindly, "for he mustn't find you ill when +he sends for you after the victory. It's not you are the only woman +that are in the hands of God this day." + +"I know that. I am very wicked, very weak," Amelia said. She knew her +own weakness well enough. The presence of the more resolute friend +checked it, however; and she was the better of this control and +company. They went on till two o'clock; their hearts were with the +column as it marched farther and farther away. Dreadful doubt and +anguish--prayers and fears and griefs unspeakable--followed the +regiment. It was the women's tribute to the war. It taxes both alike, +and takes the blood of the men, and the tears of the women. + +At half-past two, an event occurred of daily importance to Mr. Joseph: +the dinner-hour arrived. Warriors may fight and perish, but he must +dine. He came into Amelia's room to see if he could coax her to share +that meal. "Try," said he; "the soup is very good. Do try, Emmy," and +he kissed her hand. Except when she was married, he had not done so +much for years before. "You are very good and kind, Joseph," she said. +"Everybody is, but, if you please, I will stay in my room to-day." + +The savour of the soup, however, was agreeable to Mrs. O'Dowd's +nostrils: and she thought she would bear Mr. Jos company. So the two +sate down to their meal. "God bless the meat," said the Major's wife, +solemnly: she was thinking of her honest Mick, riding at the head of +his regiment: "'Tis but a bad dinner those poor boys will get to-day," +she said, with a sigh, and then, like a philosopher, fell to. + +Jos's spirits rose with his meal. He would drink the regiment's +health; or, indeed, take any other excuse to indulge in a glass of +champagne. "We'll drink to O'Dowd and the brave --th," said he, bowing +gallantly to his guest. "Hey, Mrs. O'Dowd? Fill Mrs. O'Dowd's glass, +Isidor." + +But all of a sudden, Isidor started, and the Major's wife laid down her +knife and fork. The windows of the room were open, and looked +southward, and a dull distant sound came over the sun-lighted roofs +from that direction. "What is it?" said Jos. "Why don't you pour, you +rascal?" + +"Cest le feu!" said Isidor, running to the balcony. + +"God defend us; it's cannon!" Mrs. O'Dowd cried, starting up, and +followed too to the window. A thousand pale and anxious faces might +have been seen looking from other casements. And presently it seemed +as if the whole population of the city rushed into the streets. + + + +CHAPTER XXXII + +In Which Jos Takes Flight, and the War Is Brought to a Close + +We of peaceful London City have never beheld--and please God never +shall witness--such a scene of hurry and alarm, as that which Brussels +presented. Crowds rushed to the Namur gate, from which direction the +noise proceeded, and many rode along the level chaussee, to be in +advance of any intelligence from the army. Each man asked his +neighbour for news; and even great English lords and ladies +condescended to speak to persons whom they did not know. The friends +of the French went abroad, wild with excitement, and prophesying the +triumph of their Emperor. The merchants closed their shops, and came +out to swell the general chorus of alarm and clamour. Women rushed to +the churches, and crowded the chapels, and knelt and prayed on the +flags and steps. The dull sound of the cannon went on rolling, +rolling. Presently carriages with travellers began to leave the town, +galloping away by the Ghent barrier. The prophecies of the French +partisans began to pass for facts. "He has cut the armies in two," it +was said. "He is marching straight on Brussels. He will overpower the +English, and be here to-night." "He will overpower the English," +shrieked Isidor to his master, "and will be here to-night." The man +bounded in and out from the lodgings to the street, always returning +with some fresh particulars of disaster. Jos's face grew paler and +paler. Alarm began to take entire possession of the stout civilian. +All the champagne he drank brought no courage to him. Before sunset he +was worked up to such a pitch of nervousness as gratified his friend +Isidor to behold, who now counted surely upon the spoils of the owner +of the laced coat. + +The women were away all this time. After hearing the firing for a +moment, the stout Major's wife bethought her of her friend in the next +chamber, and ran in to watch, and if possible to console, Amelia. The +idea that she had that helpless and gentle creature to protect, gave +additional strength to the natural courage of the honest Irishwoman. +She passed five hours by her friend's side, sometimes in remonstrance, +sometimes talking cheerfully, oftener in silence and terrified mental +supplication. "I never let go her hand once," said the stout lady +afterwards, "until after sunset, when the firing was over." Pauline, +the bonne, was on her knees at church hard by, praying for son homme a +elle. + +When the noise of the cannonading was over, Mrs. O'Dowd issued out of +Amelia's room into the parlour adjoining, where Jos sate with two +emptied flasks, and courage entirely gone. Once or twice he had +ventured into his sister's bedroom, looking very much alarmed, and as +if he would say something. But the Major's wife kept her place, and he +went away without disburthening himself of his speech. He was ashamed +to tell her that he wanted to fly. + +But when she made her appearance in the dining-room, where he sate in +the twilight in the cheerless company of his empty champagne bottles, +he began to open his mind to her. + +"Mrs. O'Dowd," he said, "hadn't you better get Amelia ready?" + +"Are you going to take her out for a walk?" said the Major's lady; +"sure she's too weak to stir." + +"I--I've ordered the carriage," he said, "and--and post-horses; Isidor +is gone for them," Jos continued. + +"What do you want with driving to-night?" answered the lady. "Isn't +she better on her bed? I've just got her to lie down." + +"Get her up," said Jos; "she must get up, I say": and he stamped his +foot energetically. "I say the horses are ordered--yes, the horses are +ordered. It's all over, and--" + +"And what?" asked Mrs. O'Dowd. + +"I'm off for Ghent," Jos answered. "Everybody is going; there's a +place for you! We shall start in half-an-hour." + +The Major's wife looked at him with infinite scorn. "I don't move till +O'Dowd gives me the route," said she. "You may go if you like, Mr. +Sedley; but, faith, Amelia and I stop here." + +"She SHALL go," said Jos, with another stamp of his foot. Mrs. O'Dowd +put herself with arms akimbo before the bedroom door. + +"Is it her mother you're going to take her to?" she said; "or do you +want to go to Mamma yourself, Mr. Sedley? Good marning--a pleasant +journey to ye, sir. Bon voyage, as they say, and take my counsel, and +shave off them mustachios, or they'll bring you into mischief." + +"D--n!" yelled out Jos, wild with fear, rage, and mortification; and +Isidor came in at this juncture, swearing in his turn. "Pas de +chevaux, sacre bleu!" hissed out the furious domestic. All the horses +were gone. Jos was not the only man in Brussels seized with panic that +day. + +But Jos's fears, great and cruel as they were already, were destined to +increase to an almost frantic pitch before the night was over. It has +been mentioned how Pauline, the bonne, had son homme a elle also in the +ranks of the army that had gone out to meet the Emperor Napoleon. This +lover was a native of Brussels, and a Belgian hussar. The troops of +his nation signalised themselves in this war for anything but courage, +and young Van Cutsum, Pauline's admirer, was too good a soldier to +disobey his Colonel's orders to run away. Whilst in garrison at +Brussels young Regulus (he had been born in the revolutionary times) +found his great comfort, and passed almost all his leisure moments, in +Pauline's kitchen; and it was with pockets and holsters crammed full of +good things from her larder, that he had take leave of his weeping +sweetheart, to proceed upon the campaign a few days before. + +As far as his regiment was concerned, this campaign was over now. They +had formed a part of the division under the command of his Sovereign +apparent, the Prince of Orange, and as respected length of swords and +mustachios, and the richness of uniform and equipments, Regulus and his +comrades looked to be as gallant a body of men as ever trumpet sounded +for. + +When Ney dashed upon the advance of the allied troops, carrying one +position after the other, until the arrival of the great body of the +British army from Brussels changed the aspect of the combat of Quatre +Bras, the squadrons among which Regulus rode showed the greatest +activity in retreating before the French, and were dislodged from one +post and another which they occupied with perfect alacrity on their +part. Their movements were only checked by the advance of the British +in their rear. Thus forced to halt, the enemy's cavalry (whose +bloodthirsty obstinacy cannot be too severely reprehended) had at +length an opportunity of coming to close quarters with the brave +Belgians before them; who preferred to encounter the British rather +than the French, and at once turning tail rode through the English +regiments that were behind them, and scattered in all directions. The +regiment in fact did not exist any more. It was nowhere. It had no +head-quarters. Regulus found himself galloping many miles from the +field of action, entirely alone; and whither should he fly for refuge +so naturally as to that kitchen and those faithful arms in which +Pauline had so often welcomed him? + +At some ten o'clock the clinking of a sabre might have been heard up +the stair of the house where the Osbornes occupied a story in the +continental fashion. A knock might have been heard at the kitchen +door; and poor Pauline, come back from church, fainted almost with +terror as she opened it and saw before her her haggard hussar. He +looked as pale as the midnight dragoon who came to disturb Leonora. +Pauline would have screamed, but that her cry would have called her +masters, and discovered her friend. She stifled her scream, then, and +leading her hero into the kitchen, gave him beer, and the choice bits +from the dinner, which Jos had not had the heart to taste. The hussar +showed he was no ghost by the prodigious quantity of flesh and beer +which he devoured--and during the mouthfuls he told his tale of +disaster. + +His regiment had performed prodigies of courage, and had withstood for +a while the onset of the whole French army. But they were overwhelmed +at last, as was the whole British army by this time. Ney destroyed each +regiment as it came up. The Belgians in vain interposed to prevent the +butchery of the English. The Brunswickers were routed and had +fled--their Duke was killed. It was a general debacle. He sought to +drown his sorrow for the defeat in floods of beer. + +Isidor, who had come into the kitchen, heard the conversation and +rushed out to inform his master. "It is all over," he shrieked to Jos. +"Milor Duke is a prisoner; the Duke of Brunswick is killed; the British +army is in full flight; there is only one man escaped, and he is in the +kitchen now--come and hear him." So Jos tottered into that apartment +where Regulus still sate on the kitchen table, and clung fast to his +flagon of beer. In the best French which he could muster, and which +was in sooth of a very ungrammatical sort, Jos besought the hussar to +tell his tale. The disasters deepened as Regulus spoke. He was the +only man of his regiment not slain on the field. He had seen the Duke +of Brunswick fall, the black hussars fly, the Ecossais pounded down by +the cannon. "And the --th?" gasped Jos. + +"Cut in pieces," said the hussar--upon which Pauline cried out, "O my +mistress, ma bonne petite dame," went off fairly into hysterics, and +filled the house with her screams. + +Wild with terror, Mr. Sedley knew not how or where to seek for safety. +He rushed from the kitchen back to the sitting-room, and cast an +appealing look at Amelia's door, which Mrs. O'Dowd had closed and +locked in his face; but he remembered how scornfully the latter had +received him, and after pausing and listening for a brief space at the +door, he left it, and resolved to go into the street, for the first +time that day. So, seizing a candle, he looked about for his +gold-laced cap, and found it lying in its usual place, on a +console-table, in the anteroom, placed before a mirror at which Jos +used to coquet, always giving his side-locks a twirl, and his cap the +proper cock over his eye, before he went forth to make appearance in +public. Such is the force of habit, that even in the midst of his +terror he began mechanically to twiddle with his hair, and arrange the +cock of his hat. Then he looked amazed at the pale face in the glass +before him, and especially at his mustachios, which had attained a rich +growth in the course of near seven weeks, since they had come into the +world. They WILL mistake me for a military man, thought he, +remembering Isidor's warning as to the massacre with which all the +defeated British army was threatened; and staggering back to his +bedchamber, he began wildly pulling the bell which summoned his valet. + +Isidor answered that summons. Jos had sunk in a chair--he had torn off +his neckcloths, and turned down his collars, and was sitting with both +his hands lifted to his throat. + +"Coupez-moi, Isidor," shouted he; "vite! Coupez-moi!" + +Isidor thought for a moment he had gone mad, and that he wished his +valet to cut his throat. + +"Les moustaches," gasped Joe; "les moustaches--coupy, rasy, vite!"--his +French was of this sort--voluble, as we have said, but not +remarkable for grammar. + +Isidor swept off the mustachios in no time with the razor, and heard +with inexpressible delight his master's orders that he should fetch a +hat and a plain coat. "Ne porty ploo--habit militair--bonn--bonny a +voo, prenny dehors"--were Jos's words--the coat and cap were at last +his property. + +This gift being made, Jos selected a plain black coat and waistcoat +from his stock, and put on a large white neckcloth, and a plain beaver. +If he could have got a shovel hat he would have worn it. As it was, you +would have fancied he was a flourishing, large parson of the Church of +England. + +"Venny maintenong," he continued, "sweevy--ally--party--dong la roo." +And so having said, he plunged swiftly down the stairs of the house, +and passed into the street. + +Although Regulus had vowed that he was the only man of his regiment or +of the allied army, almost, who had escaped being cut to pieces by Ney, +it appeared that his statement was incorrect, and that a good number +more of the supposed victims had survived the massacre. Many scores of +Regulus's comrades had found their way back to Brussels, and all +agreeing that they had run away--filled the whole town with an idea of +the defeat of the allies. The arrival of the French was expected +hourly; the panic continued, and preparations for flight went on +everywhere. No horses! thought Jos, in terror. He made Isidor inquire +of scores of persons, whether they had any to lend or sell, and his +heart sank within him, at the negative answers returned everywhere. +Should he take the journey on foot? Even fear could not render that +ponderous body so active. + +Almost all the hotels occupied by the English in Brussels face the +Parc, and Jos wandered irresolutely about in this quarter, with crowds +of other people, oppressed as he was by fear and curiosity. Some +families he saw more happy than himself, having discovered a team of +horses, and rattling through the streets in retreat; others again there +were whose case was like his own, and who could not for any bribes or +entreaties procure the necessary means of flight. Amongst these +would-be fugitives, Jos remarked the Lady Bareacres and her daughter, +who sate in their carriage in the porte-cochere of their hotel, all +their imperials packed, and the only drawback to whose flight was the +same want of motive power which kept Jos stationary. + +Rebecca Crawley occupied apartments in this hotel; and had before this +period had sundry hostile meetings with the ladies of the Bareacres +family. My Lady Bareacres cut Mrs. Crawley on the stairs when they met +by chance; and in all places where the latter's name was mentioned, +spoke perseveringly ill of her neighbour. The Countess was shocked at +the familiarity of General Tufto with the aide-de-camp's wife. The +Lady Blanche avoided her as if she had been an infectious disease. +Only the Earl himself kept up a sly occasional acquaintance with her, +when out of the jurisdiction of his ladies. + +Rebecca had her revenge now upon these insolent enemies. It became +known in the hotel that Captain Crawley's horses had been left behind, +and when the panic began, Lady Bareacres condescended to send her maid +to the Captain's wife with her Ladyship's compliments, and a desire to +know the price of Mrs. Crawley's horses. Mrs. Crawley returned a note +with her compliments, and an intimation that it was not her custom to +transact bargains with ladies' maids. + +This curt reply brought the Earl in person to Becky's apartment; but he +could get no more success than the first ambassador. "Send a lady's +maid to ME!" Mrs. Crawley cried in great anger; "why didn't my Lady +Bareacres tell me to go and saddle the horses! Is it her Ladyship that +wants to escape, or her Ladyship's femme de chambre?" And this was all +the answer that the Earl bore back to his Countess. + +What will not necessity do? The Countess herself actually came to wait +upon Mrs. Crawley on the failure of her second envoy. She entreated +her to name her own price; she even offered to invite Becky to +Bareacres House, if the latter would but give her the means of +returning to that residence. Mrs. Crawley sneered at her. + +"I don't want to be waited on by bailiffs in livery," she said; "you +will never get back though most probably--at least not you and your +diamonds together. The French will have those. They will be here in two +hours, and I shall be half way to Ghent by that time. I would not sell +you my horses, no, not for the two largest diamonds that your Ladyship +wore at the ball." Lady Bareacres trembled with rage and terror. The +diamonds were sewed into her habit, and secreted in my Lord's padding +and boots. "Woman, the diamonds are at the banker's, and I WILL have +the horses," she said. Rebecca laughed in her face. The infuriate +Countess went below, and sate in her carriage; her maid, her courier, +and her husband were sent once more through the town, each to look for +cattle; and woe betide those who came last! Her Ladyship was resolved +on departing the very instant the horses arrived from any quarter--with +her husband or without him. + +Rebecca had the pleasure of seeing her Ladyship in the horseless +carriage, and keeping her eyes fixed upon her, and bewailing, in the +loudest tone of voice, the Countess's perplexities. "Not to be able to +get horses!" she said, "and to have all those diamonds sewed into the +carriage cushions! What a prize it will be for the French when they +come!--the carriage and the diamonds, I mean; not the lady!" She gave +this information to the landlord, to the servants, to the guests, and +the innumerable stragglers about the courtyard. Lady Bareacres could +have shot her from the carriage window. + +It was while enjoying the humiliation of her enemy that Rebecca caught +sight of Jos, who made towards her directly he perceived her. + +That altered, frightened, fat face, told his secret well enough. He +too wanted to fly, and was on the look-out for the means of escape. "HE +shall buy my horses," thought Rebecca, "and I'll ride the mare." + +Jos walked up to his friend, and put the question for the hundredth +time during the past hour, "Did she know where horses were to be had?" + +"What, YOU fly?" said Rebecca, with a laugh. "I thought you were the +champion of all the ladies, Mr. Sedley." + +"I--I'm not a military man," gasped he. + +"And Amelia?--Who is to protect that poor little sister of yours?" +asked Rebecca. "You surely would not desert her?" + +"What good can I do her, suppose--suppose the enemy arrive?" Jos +answered. "They'll spare the women; but my man tells me that they have +taken an oath to give no quarter to the men--the dastardly cowards." + +"Horrid!" cried Rebecca, enjoying his perplexity. + +"Besides, I don't want to desert her," cried the brother. "She SHAN'T +be deserted. There is a seat for her in my carriage, and one for you, +dear Mrs. Crawley, if you will come; and if we can get horses--" sighed +he-- + +"I have two to sell," the lady said. Jos could have flung himself into +her arms at the news. "Get the carriage, Isidor," he cried; "we've +found them--we have found them." + +"My horses never were in harness," added the lady. "Bullfinch would kick +the carriage to pieces, if you put him in the traces." + +"But he is quiet to ride?" asked the civilian. + +"As quiet as a lamb, and as fast as a hare," answered Rebecca. + +"Do you think he is up to my weight?" Jos said. He was already on his +back, in imagination, without ever so much as a thought for poor +Amelia. What person who loved a horse-speculation could resist such a +temptation? + +In reply, Rebecca asked him to come into her room, whither he followed +her quite breathless to conclude the bargain. Jos seldom spent a +half-hour in his life which cost him so much money. Rebecca, measuring +the value of the goods which she had for sale by Jos's eagerness to +purchase, as well as by the scarcity of the article, put upon her +horses a price so prodigious as to make even the civilian draw back. +"She would sell both or neither," she said, resolutely. Rawdon had +ordered her not to part with them for a price less than that which she +specified. Lord Bareacres below would give her the same money--and with +all her love and regard for the Sedley family, her dear Mr. Joseph must +conceive that poor people must live--nobody, in a word, could be more +affectionate, but more firm about the matter of business. + +Jos ended by agreeing, as might be supposed of him. The sum he had to +give her was so large that he was obliged to ask for time; so large as +to be a little fortune to Rebecca, who rapidly calculated that with +this sum, and the sale of the residue of Rawdon's effects, and her +pension as a widow should he fall, she would now be absolutely +independent of the world, and might look her weeds steadily in the face. + +Once or twice in the day she certainly had herself thought about +flying. But her reason gave her better counsel. "Suppose the French +do come," thought Becky, "what can they do to a poor officer's widow? +Bah! the times of sacks and sieges are over. We shall be let to go +home quietly, or I may live pleasantly abroad with a snug little +income." + +Meanwhile Jos and Isidor went off to the stables to inspect the newly +purchased cattle. Jos bade his man saddle the horses at once. He would +ride away that very night, that very hour. And he left the valet busy +in getting the horses ready, and went homewards himself to prepare for +his departure. It must be secret. He would go to his chamber by the +back entrance. He did not care to face Mrs. O'Dowd and Amelia, and own +to them that he was about to run. + +By the time Jos's bargain with Rebecca was completed, and his horses +had been visited and examined, it was almost morning once more. But +though midnight was long passed, there was no rest for the city; the +people were up, the lights in the houses flamed, crowds were still +about the doors, and the streets were busy. Rumours of various natures +went still from mouth to mouth: one report averred that the Prussians +had been utterly defeated; another that it was the English who had been +attacked and conquered: a third that the latter had held their ground. +This last rumour gradually got strength. No Frenchmen had made their +appearance. Stragglers had come in from the army bringing reports more +and more favourable: at last an aide-de-camp actually reached Brussels +with despatches for the Commandant of the place, who placarded +presently through the town an official announcement of the success of +the allies at Quatre Bras, and the entire repulse of the French under +Ney after a six hours' battle. The aide-de-camp must have arrived +sometime while Jos and Rebecca were making their bargain together, or +the latter was inspecting his purchase. When he reached his own hotel, +he found a score of its numerous inhabitants on the threshold +discoursing of the news; there was no doubt as to its truth. And he +went up to communicate it to the ladies under his charge. He did not +think it was necessary to tell them how he had intended to take leave +of them, how he had bought horses, and what a price he had paid for +them. + +But success or defeat was a minor matter to them, who had only thought +for the safety of those they loved. Amelia, at the news of the victory, +became still more agitated even than before. She was for going that +moment to the army. She besought her brother with tears to conduct her +thither. Her doubts and terrors reached their paroxysm; and the poor +girl, who for many hours had been plunged into stupor, raved and ran +hither and thither in hysteric insanity--a piteous sight. No man +writhing in pain on the hard-fought field fifteen miles off, where lay, +after their struggles, so many of the brave--no man suffered more +keenly than this poor harmless victim of the war. Jos could not bear +the sight of her pain. He left his sister in the charge of her stouter +female companion, and descended once more to the threshold of the +hotel, where everybody still lingered, and talked, and waited for more +news. + +It grew to be broad daylight as they stood here, and fresh news began +to arrive from the war, brought by men who had been actors in the +scene. Wagons and long country carts laden with wounded came rolling +into the town; ghastly groans came from within them, and haggard faces +looked up sadly from out of the straw. Jos Sedley was looking at one +of these carriages with a painful curiosity--the moans of the people +within were frightful--the wearied horses could hardly pull the cart. +"Stop! stop!" a feeble voice cried from the straw, and the carriage +stopped opposite Mr. Sedley's hotel. + +"It is George, I know it is!" cried Amelia, rushing in a moment to the +balcony, with a pallid face and loose flowing hair. It was not George, +however, but it was the next best thing: it was news of him. + +It was poor Tom Stubble, who had marched out of Brussels so gallantly +twenty-four hours before, bearing the colours of the regiment, which he +had defended very gallantly upon the field. A French lancer had +speared the young ensign in the leg, who fell, still bravely holding to +his flag. At the conclusion of the engagement, a place had been found +for the poor boy in a cart, and he had been brought back to Brussels. + +"Mr. Sedley, Mr. Sedley!" cried the boy, faintly, and Jos came up +almost frightened at the appeal. He had not at first distinguished who +it was that called him. + +Little Tom Stubble held out his hot and feeble hand. "I'm to be taken +in here," he said. "Osborne--and--and Dobbin said I was; and you are +to give the man two napoleons: my mother will pay you." This young +fellow's thoughts, during the long feverish hours passed in the cart, +had been wandering to his father's parsonage which he had quitted only +a few months before, and he had sometimes forgotten his pain in that +delirium. + +The hotel was large, and the people kind, and all the inmates of the +cart were taken in and placed on various couches. The young ensign was +conveyed upstairs to Osborne's quarters. Amelia and the Major's wife +had rushed down to him, when the latter had recognised him from the +balcony. You may fancy the feelings of these women when they were told +that the day was over, and both their husbands were safe; in what mute +rapture Amelia fell on her good friend's neck, and embraced her; in +what a grateful passion of prayer she fell on her knees, and thanked +the Power which had saved her husband. + +Our young lady, in her fevered and nervous condition, could have had no +more salutary medicine prescribed for her by any physician than that +which chance put in her way. She and Mrs. O'Dowd watched incessantly +by the wounded lad, whose pains were very severe, and in the duty thus +forced upon her, Amelia had not time to brood over her personal +anxieties, or to give herself up to her own fears and forebodings after +her wont. The young patient told in his simple fashion the events of +the day, and the actions of our friends of the gallant --th. They had +suffered severely. They had lost very many officers and men. The +Major's horse had been shot under him as the regiment charged, and they +all thought that O'Dowd was gone, and that Dobbin had got his majority, +until on their return from the charge to their old ground, the Major +was discovered seated on Pyramus's carcase, refreshing him-self from a +case-bottle. It was Captain Osborne that cut down the French lancer +who had speared the ensign. Amelia turned so pale at the notion, that +Mrs. O'Dowd stopped the young ensign in this story. And it was Captain +Dobbin who at the end of the day, though wounded himself, took up the +lad in his arms and carried him to the surgeon, and thence to the cart +which was to bring him back to Brussels. And it was he who promised +the driver two louis if he would make his way to Mr. Sedley's hotel in +the city; and tell Mrs. Captain Osborne that the action was over, and +that her husband was unhurt and well. + +"Indeed, but he has a good heart that William Dobbin," Mrs. O'Dowd +said, "though he is always laughing at me." + +Young Stubble vowed there was not such another officer in the army, and +never ceased his praises of the senior captain, his modesty, his +kindness, and his admirable coolness in the field. To these parts of +the conversation, Amelia lent a very distracted attention: it was only +when George was spoken of that she listened, and when he was not +mentioned, she thought about him. + +In tending her patient, and in thinking of the wonderful escapes of the +day before, her second day passed away not too slowly with Amelia. +There was only one man in the army for her: and as long as he was +well, it must be owned that its movements interested her little. All +the reports which Jos brought from the streets fell very vaguely on her +ears; though they were sufficient to give that timorous gentleman, and +many other people then in Brussels, every disquiet. The French had +been repulsed certainly, but it was after a severe and doubtful +struggle, and with only a division of the French army. The Emperor, +with the main body, was away at Ligny, where he had utterly annihilated +the Prussians, and was now free to bring his whole force to bear upon +the allies. The Duke of Wellington was retreating upon the capital, and +a great battle must be fought under its walls probably, of which the +chances were more than doubtful. The Duke of Wellington had but twenty +thousand British troops on whom he could rely, for the Germans were raw +militia, the Belgians disaffected, and with this handful his Grace had +to resist a hundred and fifty thousand men that had broken into Belgium +under Napoleon. Under Napoleon! What warrior was there, however +famous and skilful, that could fight at odds with him? + +Jos thought of all these things, and trembled. So did all the rest of +Brussels--where people felt that the fight of the day before was but +the prelude to the greater combat which was imminent. One of the +armies opposed to the Emperor was scattered to the winds already. The +few English that could be brought to resist him would perish at their +posts, and the conqueror would pass over their bodies into the city. +Woe be to those whom he found there! Addresses were prepared, public +functionaries assembled and debated secretly, apartments were got +ready, and tricoloured banners and triumphal emblems manufactured, to +welcome the arrival of His Majesty the Emperor and King. + +The emigration still continued, and wherever families could find means +of departure, they fled. When Jos, on the afternoon of the 17th of +June, went to Rebecca's hotel, he found that the great Bareacres' +carriage had at length rolled away from the porte-cochere. The Earl +had procured a pair of horses somehow, in spite of Mrs. Crawley, and +was rolling on the road to Ghent. Louis the Desired was getting ready +his portmanteau in that city, too. It seemed as if Misfortune was +never tired of worrying into motion that unwieldy exile. + +Jos felt that the delay of yesterday had been only a respite, and that +his dearly bought horses must of a surety be put into requisition. His +agonies were very severe all this day. As long as there was an English +army between Brussels and Napoleon, there was no need of immediate +flight; but he had his horses brought from their distant stables, to +the stables in the court-yard of the hotel where he lived; so that they +might be under his own eyes, and beyond the risk of violent abduction. +Isidor watched the stable-door constantly, and had the horses saddled, +to be ready for the start. He longed intensely for that event. + +After the reception of the previous day, Rebecca did not care to come +near her dear Amelia. She clipped the bouquet which George had brought +her, and gave fresh water to the flowers, and read over the letter +which he had sent her. "Poor wretch," she said, twirling round the +little bit of paper in her fingers, "how I could crush her with +this!--and it is for a thing like this that she must break her heart, +forsooth--for a man who is stupid--a coxcomb--and who does not care for +her. My poor good Rawdon is worth ten of this creature." And then she +fell to thinking what she should do if--if anything happened to poor +good Rawdon, and what a great piece of luck it was that he had left his +horses behind. + +In the course of this day too, Mrs. Crawley, who saw not without anger +the Bareacres party drive off, bethought her of the precaution which +the Countess had taken, and did a little needlework for her own +advantage; she stitched away the major part of her trinkets, bills, and +bank-notes about her person, and so prepared, was ready for any +event--to fly if she thought fit, or to stay and welcome the conqueror, +were he Englishman or Frenchman. And I am not sure that she did not +dream that night of becoming a duchess and Madame la Marechale, while +Rawdon wrapped in his cloak, and making his bivouac under the rain at +Mount Saint John, was thinking, with all the force of his heart, about +the little wife whom he had left behind him. + +The next day was a Sunday. And Mrs. Major O'Dowd had the satisfaction +of seeing both her patients refreshed in health and spirits by some +rest which they had taken during the night. She herself had slept on a +great chair in Amelia's room, ready to wait upon her poor friend or the +ensign, should either need her nursing. When morning came, this robust +woman went back to the house where she and her Major had their billet; +and here performed an elaborate and splendid toilette, befitting the +day. And it is very possible that whilst alone in that chamber, which +her husband had inhabited, and where his cap still lay on the pillow, +and his cane stood in the corner, one prayer at least was sent up to +Heaven for the welfare of the brave soldier, Michael O'Dowd. + +When she returned she brought her prayer-book with her, and her uncle +the Dean's famous book of sermons, out of which she never failed to +read every Sabbath; not understanding all, haply, not pronouncing many +of the words aright, which were long and abstruse--for the Dean was a +learned man, and loved long Latin words--but with great gravity, vast +emphasis, and with tolerable correctness in the main. How often has my +Mick listened to these sermons, she thought, and me reading in the +cabin of a calm! She proposed to resume this exercise on the present +day, with Amelia and the wounded ensign for a congregation. The same +service was read on that day in twenty thousand churches at the same +hour; and millions of British men and women, on their knees, implored +protection of the Father of all. + +They did not hear the noise which disturbed our little congregation at +Brussels. Much louder than that which had interrupted them two days +previously, as Mrs. O'Dowd was reading the service in her best voice, +the cannon of Waterloo began to roar. + +When Jos heard that dreadful sound, he made up his mind that he would +bear this perpetual recurrence of terrors no longer, and would fly at +once. He rushed into the sick man's room, where our three friends had +paused in their prayers, and further interrupted them by a passionate +appeal to Amelia. + +"I can't stand it any more, Emmy," he said; "I won't stand it; and you +must come with me. I have bought a horse for you--never mind at what +price--and you must dress and come with me, and ride behind Isidor." + +"God forgive me, Mr. Sedley, but you are no better than a coward," Mrs. +O'Dowd said, laying down the book. + +"I say come, Amelia," the civilian went on; "never mind what she says; +why are we to stop here and be butchered by the Frenchmen?" + +"You forget the --th, my boy," said the little Stubble, the wounded +hero, from his bed--"and and you won't leave me, will you, Mrs. O'Dowd?" + +"No, my dear fellow," said she, going up and kissing the boy. "No harm +shall come to you while I stand by. I don't budge till I get the word +from Mick. A pretty figure I'd be, wouldn't I, stuck behind that chap +on a pillion?" + +This image caused the young patient to burst out laughing in his bed, +and even made Amelia smile. "I don't ask her," Jos shouted out--"I +don't ask that--that Irishwoman, but you Amelia; once for all, will you +come?" + +"Without my husband, Joseph?" Amelia said, with a look of wonder, and +gave her hand to the Major's wife. Jos's patience was exhausted. + +"Good-bye, then," he said, shaking his fist in a rage, and slamming the +door by which he retreated. And this time he really gave his order for +march: and mounted in the court-yard. Mrs. O'Dowd heard the +clattering hoofs of the horses as they issued from the gate; and +looking on, made many scornful remarks on poor Joseph as he rode down +the street with Isidor after him in the laced cap. The horses, which +had not been exercised for some days, were lively, and sprang about the +street. Jos, a clumsy and timid horseman, did not look to advantage in +the saddle. "Look at him, Amelia dear, driving into the parlour +window. Such a bull in a china-shop I never saw." And presently the +pair of riders disappeared at a canter down the street leading in the +direction of the Ghent road, Mrs. O'Dowd pursuing them with a fire of +sarcasm so long as they were in sight. + +All that day from morning until past sunset, the cannon never ceased to +roar. It was dark when the cannonading stopped all of a sudden. + +All of us have read of what occurred during that interval. The tale is +in every Englishman's mouth; and you and I, who were children when the +great battle was won and lost, are never tired of hearing and +recounting the history of that famous action. Its remembrance rankles +still in the bosoms of millions of the countrymen of those brave men +who lost the day. They pant for an opportunity of revenging that +humiliation; and if a contest, ending in a victory on their part, +should ensue, elating them in their turn, and leaving its cursed legacy +of hatred and rage behind to us, there is no end to the so-called glory +and shame, and to the alternations of successful and unsuccessful +murder, in which two high-spirited nations might engage. Centuries +hence, we Frenchmen and Englishmen might be boasting and killing each +other still, carrying out bravely the Devil's code of honour. + +All our friends took their share and fought like men in the great +field. All day long, whilst the women were praying ten miles away, the +lines of the dauntless English infantry were receiving and repelling +the furious charges of the French horsemen. Guns which were heard at +Brussels were ploughing up their ranks, and comrades falling, and the +resolute survivors closing in. Towards evening, the attack of the +French, repeated and resisted so bravely, slackened in its fury. They +had other foes besides the British to engage, or were preparing for a +final onset. It came at last: the columns of the Imperial Guard +marched up the hill of Saint Jean, at length and at once to sweep the +English from the height which they had maintained all day, and spite of +all: unscared by the thunder of the artillery, which hurled death from +the English line--the dark rolling column pressed on and up the hill. +It seemed almost to crest the eminence, when it began to wave and +falter. Then it stopped, still facing the shot. Then at last the +English troops rushed from the post from which no enemy had been able +to dislodge them, and the Guard turned and fled. + +No more firing was heard at Brussels--the pursuit rolled miles away. +Darkness came down on the field and city: and Amelia was praying for +George, who was lying on his face, dead, with a bullet through his +heart. + + + +CHAPTER XXXIII + +In Which Miss Crawley's Relations Are Very Anxious About Her + +The kind reader must please to remember--while the army is marching +from Flanders, and, after its heroic actions there, is advancing to +take the fortifications on the frontiers of France, previous to an +occupation of that country--that there are a number of persons living +peaceably in England who have to do with the history at present in +hand, and must come in for their share of the chronicle. During the +time of these battles and dangers, old Miss Crawley was living at +Brighton, very moderately moved by the great events that were going on. +The great events rendered the newspapers rather interesting, to be +sure, and Briggs read out the Gazette, in which Rawdon Crawley's +gallantry was mentioned with honour, and his promotion was presently +recorded. + +"What a pity that young man has taken such an irretrievable step in the +world!" his aunt said; "with his rank and distinction he might have +married a brewer's daughter with a quarter of a million--like Miss +Grains; or have looked to ally himself with the best families in +England. He would have had my money some day or other; or his children +would--for I'm not in a hurry to go, Miss Briggs, although you may be +in a hurry to be rid of me; and instead of that, he is a doomed pauper, +with a dancing-girl for a wife." + +"Will my dear Miss Crawley not cast an eye of compassion upon the +heroic soldier, whose name is inscribed in the annals of his country's +glory?" said Miss Briggs, who was greatly excited by the Waterloo +proceedings, and loved speaking romantically when there was an +occasion. "Has not the Captain--or the Colonel as I may now style +him--done deeds which make the name of Crawley illustrious?" + +"Briggs, you are a fool," said Miss Crawley: "Colonel Crawley has +dragged the name of Crawley through the mud, Miss Briggs. Marry a +drawing-master's daughter, indeed!--marry a dame de compagnie--for she +was no better, Briggs; no, she was just what you are--only younger, and +a great deal prettier and cleverer. Were you an accomplice of that +abandoned wretch, I wonder, of whose vile arts he became a victim, and +of whom you used to be such an admirer? Yes, I daresay you were an +accomplice. But you will find yourself disappointed in my will, I can +tell you: and you will have the goodness to write to Mr. Waxy, and say +that I desire to see him immediately." Miss Crawley was now in the +habit of writing to Mr. Waxy her solicitor almost every day in the +week, for her arrangements respecting her property were all revoked, +and her perplexity was great as to the future disposition of her money. + +The spinster had, however, rallied considerably; as was proved by the +increased vigour and frequency of her sarcasms upon Miss Briggs, all +which attacks the poor companion bore with meekness, with cowardice, +with a resignation that was half generous and half hypocritical--with +the slavish submission, in a word, that women of her disposition and +station are compelled to show. Who has not seen how women bully women? +What tortures have men to endure, comparable to those daily repeated +shafts of scorn and cruelty with which poor women are riddled by the +tyrants of their sex? Poor victims! But we are starting from our +proposition, which is, that Miss Crawley was always particularly +annoying and savage when she was rallying from illness--as they say +wounds tingle most when they are about to heal. + +While thus approaching, as all hoped, to convalescence, Miss Briggs was +the only victim admitted into the presence of the invalid; yet Miss +Crawley's relatives afar off did not forget their beloved kinswoman, +and by a number of tokens, presents, and kind affectionate messages, +strove to keep themselves alive in her recollection. + +In the first place, let us mention her nephew, Rawdon Crawley. A few +weeks after the famous fight of Waterloo, and after the Gazette had +made known to her the promotion and gallantry of that distinguished +officer, the Dieppe packet brought over to Miss Crawley at Brighton, a +box containing presents, and a dutiful letter, from the Colonel her +nephew. In the box were a pair of French epaulets, a Cross of the +Legion of Honour, and the hilt of a sword--relics from the field of +battle: and the letter described with a good deal of humour how the +latter belonged to a commanding officer of the Guard, who having sworn +that "the Guard died, but never surrendered," was taken prisoner the +next minute by a private soldier, who broke the Frenchman's sword with +the butt of his musket, when Rawdon made himself master of the +shattered weapon. As for the cross and epaulets, they came from a +Colonel of French cavalry, who had fallen under the aide-de-camp's arm +in the battle: and Rawdon Crawley did not know what better to do with +the spoils than to send them to his kindest and most affectionate old +friend. Should he continue to write to her from Paris, whither the army +was marching? He might be able to give her interesting news from that +capital, and of some of Miss Crawley's old friends of the emigration, +to whom she had shown so much kindness during their distress. + +The spinster caused Briggs to write back to the Colonel a gracious and +complimentary letter, encouraging him to continue his correspondence. +His first letter was so excessively lively and amusing that she should +look with pleasure for its successors.--"Of course, I know," she +explained to Miss Briggs, "that Rawdon could not write such a good +letter any more than you could, my poor Briggs, and that it is that +clever little wretch of a Rebecca, who dictates every word to him; but +that is no reason why my nephew should not amuse me; and so I wish to +let him understand that I am in high good humour." + +I wonder whether she knew that it was not only Becky who wrote the +letters, but that Mrs. Rawdon actually took and sent home the trophies +which she bought for a few francs, from one of the innumerable pedlars +who immediately began to deal in relics of the war. The novelist, who +knows everything, knows this also. Be this, however, as it may, Miss +Crawley's gracious reply greatly encouraged our young friends, Rawdon +and his lady, who hoped for the best from their aunt's evidently +pacified humour: and they took care to entertain her with many +delightful letters from Paris, whither, as Rawdon said, they had the +good luck to go in the track of the conquering army. + +To the rector's lady, who went off to tend her husband's broken +collar-bone at the Rectory at Queen's Crawley, the spinster's +communications were by no means so gracious. Mrs. Bute, that brisk, +managing, lively, imperious woman, had committed the most fatal of all +errors with regard to her sister-in-law. She had not merely oppressed +her and her household--she had bored Miss Crawley; and if poor Miss +Briggs had been a woman of any spirit, she might have been made happy +by the commission which her principal gave her to write a letter to +Mrs. Bute Crawley, saying that Miss Crawley's health was greatly +improved since Mrs. Bute had left her, and begging the latter on no +account to put herself to trouble, or quit her family for Miss +Crawley's sake. This triumph over a lady who had been very haughty and +cruel in her behaviour to Miss Briggs, would have rejoiced most women; +but the truth is, Briggs was a woman of no spirit at all, and the +moment her enemy was discomfited, she began to feel compassion in her +favour. + +"How silly I was," Mrs. Bute thought, and with reason, "ever to hint +that I was coming, as I did, in that foolish letter when we sent Miss +Crawley the guinea-fowls. I ought to have gone without a word to the +poor dear doting old creature, and taken her out of the hands of that +ninny Briggs, and that harpy of a femme de chambre. Oh! Bute, Bute, +why did you break your collar-bone?" + +Why, indeed? We have seen how Mrs. Bute, having the game in her hands, +had really played her cards too well. She had ruled over Miss Crawley's +household utterly and completely, to be utterly and completely routed +when a favourable opportunity for rebellion came. She and her +household, however, considered that she had been the victim of horrible +selfishness and treason, and that her sacrifices in Miss Crawley's +behalf had met with the most savage ingratitude. Rawdon's promotion, +and the honourable mention made of his name in the Gazette, filled this +good Christian lady also with alarm. Would his aunt relent towards him +now that he was a Lieutenant-Colonel and a C.B.? and would that odious +Rebecca once more get into favour? The Rector's wife wrote a sermon for +her husband about the vanity of military glory and the prosperity of +the wicked, which the worthy parson read in his best voice and without +understanding one syllable of it. He had Pitt Crawley for one of his +auditors--Pitt, who had come with his two half-sisters to church, which +the old Baronet could now by no means be brought to frequent. + +Since the departure of Becky Sharp, that old wretch had given himself +up entirely to his bad courses, to the great scandal of the county and +the mute horror of his son. The ribbons in Miss Horrocks's cap became +more splendid than ever. The polite families fled the hall and its +owner in terror. Sir Pitt went about tippling at his tenants' houses; +and drank rum-and-water with the farmers at Mudbury and the +neighbouring places on market-days. He drove the family coach-and-four +to Southampton with Miss Horrocks inside: and the county people +expected, every week, as his son did in speechless agony, that his +marriage with her would be announced in the provincial paper. It was +indeed a rude burthen for Mr. Crawley to bear. His eloquence was +palsied at the missionary meetings, and other religious assemblies in +the neighbourhood, where he had been in the habit of presiding, and of +speaking for hours; for he felt, when he rose, that the audience said, +"That is the son of the old reprobate Sir Pitt, who is very likely +drinking at the public house at this very moment." And once when he was +speaking of the benighted condition of the king of Timbuctoo, and the +number of his wives who were likewise in darkness, some gipsy miscreant +from the crowd asked, "How many is there at Queen's Crawley, Young +Squaretoes?" to the surprise of the platform, and the ruin of Mr. +Pitt's speech. And the two daughters of the house of Queen's Crawley +would have been allowed to run utterly wild (for Sir Pitt swore that no +governess should ever enter into his doors again), had not Mr. Crawley, +by threatening the old gentleman, forced the latter to send them to +school. + +Meanwhile, as we have said, whatever individual differences there might +be between them all, Miss Crawley's dear nephews and nieces were +unanimous in loving her and sending her tokens of affection. Thus Mrs. +Bute sent guinea-fowls, and some remarkably fine cauliflowers, and a +pretty purse or pincushion worked by her darling girls, who begged to +keep a LITTLE place in the recollection of their dear aunt, while Mr. +Pitt sent peaches and grapes and venison from the Hall. The +Southampton coach used to carry these tokens of affection to Miss +Crawley at Brighton: it used sometimes to convey Mr. Pitt thither too: +for his differences with Sir Pitt caused Mr. Crawley to absent himself +a good deal from home now: and besides, he had an attraction at +Brighton in the person of the Lady Jane Sheepshanks, whose engagement +to Mr. Crawley has been formerly mentioned in this history. Her +Ladyship and her sisters lived at Brighton with their mamma, the +Countess Southdown, that strong-minded woman so favourably known in +the serious world. + +A few words ought to be said regarding her Ladyship and her noble +family, who are bound by ties of present and future relationship to the +house of Crawley. Respecting the chief of the Southdown family, Clement +William, fourth Earl of Southdown, little need be told, except that his +Lordship came into Parliament (as Lord Wolsey) under the auspices of +Mr. Wilberforce, and for a time was a credit to his political sponsor, +and decidedly a serious young man. But words cannot describe the +feelings of his admirable mother, when she learned, very shortly after +her noble husband's demise, that her son was a member of several +worldly clubs, had lost largely at play at Wattier's and the Cocoa +Tree; that he had raised money on post-obits, and encumbered the +family estate; that he drove four-in-hand, and patronised the ring; and +that he actually had an opera-box, where he entertained the most +dangerous bachelor company. His name was only mentioned with groans in +the dowager's circle. + +The Lady Emily was her brother's senior by many years; and took +considerable rank in the serious world as author of some of the +delightful tracts before mentioned, and of many hymns and spiritual +pieces. A mature spinster, and having but faint ideas of marriage, her +love for the blacks occupied almost all her feelings. It is to her, I +believe, we owe that beautiful poem. + + Lead us to some sunny isle, + Yonder in the western deep; + Where the skies for ever smile, + And the blacks for ever weep, &c. + +She had correspondences with clerical gentlemen in most of our East and +West India possessions; and was secretly attached to the Reverend Silas +Hornblower, who was tattooed in the South Sea Islands. + +As for the Lady Jane, on whom, as it has been said, Mr. Pitt Crawley's +affection had been placed, she was gentle, blushing, silent, and timid. +In spite of his falling away, she wept for her brother, and was quite +ashamed of loving him still. Even yet she used to send him little +hurried smuggled notes, and pop them into the post in private. The one +dreadful secret which weighed upon her life was, that she and the old +housekeeper had been to pay Southdown a furtive visit at his chambers +in the Albany; and found him--O the naughty dear abandoned +wretch!--smoking a cigar with a bottle of Curacao before him. She +admired her sister, she adored her mother, she thought Mr. Crawley the +most delightful and accomplished of men, after Southdown, that fallen +angel: and her mamma and sister, who were ladies of the most superior +sort, managed everything for her, and regarded her with that amiable +pity, of which your really superior woman always has such a share to +give away. Her mamma ordered her dresses, her books, her bonnets, and +her ideas for her. She was made to take pony-riding, or piano-exercise, +or any other sort of bodily medicament, according as my Lady Southdown +saw meet; and her ladyship would have kept her daughter in pinafores up +to her present age of six-and-twenty, but that they were thrown off +when Lady Jane was presented to Queen Charlotte. + +When these ladies first came to their house at Brighton, it was to them +alone that Mr. Crawley paid his personal visits, contenting himself by +leaving a card at his aunt's house, and making a modest inquiry of Mr. +Bowls or his assistant footman, with respect to the health of the +invalid. When he met Miss Briggs coming home from the library with a +cargo of novels under her arm, Mr. Crawley blushed in a manner quite +unusual to him, as he stepped forward and shook Miss Crawley's +companion by the hand. He introduced Miss Briggs to the lady with whom +he happened to be walking, the Lady Jane Sheepshanks, saying, "Lady +Jane, permit me to introduce to you my aunt's kindest friend and most +affectionate companion, Miss Briggs, whom you know under another title, +as authoress of the delightful 'Lyrics of the Heart,' of which you are +so fond." Lady Jane blushed too as she held out a kind little hand to +Miss Briggs, and said something very civil and incoherent about mamma, +and proposing to call on Miss Crawley, and being glad to be made known +to the friends and relatives of Mr. Crawley; and with soft dove-like +eyes saluted Miss Briggs as they separated, while Pitt Crawley treated +her to a profound courtly bow, such as he had used to H.H. the Duchess +of Pumpernickel, when he was attache at that court. + +The artful diplomatist and disciple of the Machiavellian Binkie! It +was he who had given Lady Jane that copy of poor Briggs's early poems, +which he remembered to have seen at Queen's Crawley, with a dedication +from the poetess to his father's late wife; and he brought the volume +with him to Brighton, reading it in the Southampton coach and marking +it with his own pencil, before he presented it to the gentle Lady Jane. + +It was he, too, who laid before Lady Southdown the great advantages +which might occur from an intimacy between her family and Miss +Crawley--advantages both worldly and spiritual, he said: for Miss +Crawley was now quite alone; the monstrous dissipation and alliance of +his brother Rawdon had estranged her affections from that reprobate +young man; the greedy tyranny and avarice of Mrs. Bute Crawley had +caused the old lady to revolt against the exorbitant pretensions of +that part of the family; and though he himself had held off all his +life from cultivating Miss Crawley's friendship, with perhaps an +improper pride, he thought now that every becoming means should be +taken, both to save her soul from perdition, and to secure her fortune +to himself as the head of the house of Crawley. + +The strong-minded Lady Southdown quite agreed in both proposals of her +son-in-law, and was for converting Miss Crawley off-hand. At her own +home, both at Southdown and at Trottermore Castle, this tall and awful +missionary of the truth rode about the country in her barouche with +outriders, launched packets of tracts among the cottagers and tenants, +and would order Gaffer Jones to be converted, as she would order Goody +Hicks to take a James's powder, without appeal, resistance, or benefit +of clergy. My Lord Southdown, her late husband, an epileptic and +simple-minded nobleman, was in the habit of approving of everything +which his Matilda did and thought. So that whatever changes her own +belief might undergo (and it accommodated itself to a prodigious +variety of opinion, taken from all sorts of doctors among the +Dissenters) she had not the least scruple in ordering all her tenants +and inferiors to follow and believe after her. Thus whether she +received the Reverend Saunders McNitre, the Scotch divine; or the +Reverend Luke Waters, the mild Wesleyan; or the Reverend Giles Jowls, +the illuminated Cobbler, who dubbed himself Reverend as Napoleon +crowned himself Emperor--the household, children, tenantry of my Lady +Southdown were expected to go down on their knees with her Ladyship, +and say Amen to the prayers of either Doctor. During these exercises +old Southdown, on account of his invalid condition, was allowed to sit +in his own room, and have negus and the paper read to him. Lady Jane +was the old Earl's favourite daughter, and tended him and loved him +sincerely: as for Lady Emily, the authoress of the "Washerwoman of +Finchley Common," her denunciations of future punishment (at this +period, for her opinions modified afterwards) were so awful that they +used to frighten the timid old gentleman her father, and the physicians +declared his fits always occurred after one of her Ladyship's sermons. + +"I will certainly call," said Lady Southdown then, in reply to the +exhortation of her daughter's pretendu, Mr. Pitt Crawley--"Who is Miss +Crawley's medical man?" + +Mr. Crawley mentioned the name of Mr. Creamer. + +"A most dangerous and ignorant practitioner, my dear Pitt. I have +providentially been the means of removing him from several houses: +though in one or two instances I did not arrive in time. I could not +save poor dear General Glanders, who was dying under the hands of that +ignorant man--dying. He rallied a little under the Podgers' pills +which I administered to him; but alas! it was too late. His death was +delightful, however; and his change was only for the better; Creamer, +my dear Pitt, must leave your aunt." + +Pitt expressed his perfect acquiescence. He, too, had been carried +along by the energy of his noble kinswoman, and future mother-in-law. +He had been made to accept Saunders McNitre, Luke Waters, Giles Jowls, +Podgers' Pills, Rodgers' Pills, Pokey's Elixir, every one of her +Ladyship's remedies spiritual or temporal. He never left her house +without carrying respectfully away with him piles of her quack theology +and medicine. O, my dear brethren and fellow-sojourners in Vanity +Fair, which among you does not know and suffer under such benevolent +despots? It is in vain you say to them, "Dear Madam, I took Podgers' +specific at your orders last year, and believe in it. Why, why am I to +recant and accept the Rodgers' articles now?" There is no help for it; +the faithful proselytizer, if she cannot convince by argument, bursts +into tears, and the refusant finds himself, at the end of the contest, +taking down the bolus, and saying, "Well, well, Rodgers' be it." + +"And as for her spiritual state," continued the Lady, "that of course +must be looked to immediately: with Creamer about her, she may go off +any day: and in what a condition, my dear Pitt, in what a dreadful +condition! I will send the Reverend Mr. Irons to her instantly. Jane, +write a line to the Reverend Bartholomew Irons, in the third person, +and say that I desire the pleasure of his company this evening at tea +at half-past six. He is an awakening man; he ought to see Miss Crawley +before she rests this night. And Emily, my love, get ready a packet of +books for Miss Crawley. Put up 'A Voice from the Flames,' 'A +Trumpet-warning to Jericho,' and the 'Fleshpots Broken; or, the +Converted Cannibal.'" + +"And the 'Washerwoman of Finchley Common,' Mamma," said Lady Emily. "It +is as well to begin soothingly at first." + +"Stop, my dear ladies," said Pitt, the diplomatist. "With every +deference to the opinion of my beloved and respected Lady Southdown, I +think it would be quite unadvisable to commence so early upon serious +topics with Miss Crawley. Remember her delicate condition, and how +little, how very little accustomed she has hitherto been to +considerations connected with her immortal welfare." + +"Can we then begin too early, Pitt?" said Lady Emily, rising with six +little books already in her hand. + +"If you begin abruptly, you will frighten her altogether. I know my +aunt's worldly nature so well as to be sure that any abrupt attempt at +conversion will be the very worst means that can be employed for the +welfare of that unfortunate lady. You will only frighten and annoy +her. She will very likely fling the books away, and refuse all +acquaintance with the givers." + +"You are as worldly as Miss Crawley, Pitt," said Lady Emily, tossing +out of the room, her books in her hand. + +"And I need not tell you, my dear Lady Southdown," Pitt continued, in a +low voice, and without heeding the interruption, "how fatal a little +want of gentleness and caution may be to any hopes which we may +entertain with regard to the worldly possessions of my aunt. Remember +she has seventy thousand pounds; think of her age, and her highly +nervous and delicate condition; I know that she has destroyed the will +which was made in my brother's (Colonel Crawley's) favour: it is by +soothing that wounded spirit that we must lead it into the right path, +and not by frightening it; and so I think you will agree with me +that--that--' + +"Of course, of course," Lady Southdown remarked. "Jane, my love, you +need not send that note to Mr. Irons. If her health is such that +discussions fatigue her, we will wait her amendment. I will call upon +Miss Crawley tomorrow." + +"And if I might suggest, my sweet lady," Pitt said in a bland tone, "it +would be as well not to take our precious Emily, who is too +enthusiastic; but rather that you should be accompanied by our sweet +and dear Lady Jane." + +"Most certainly, Emily would ruin everything," Lady Southdown said; and +this time agreed to forego her usual practice, which was, as we have +said, before she bore down personally upon any individual whom she +proposed to subjugate, to fire in a quantity of tracts upon the menaced +party (as a charge of the French was always preceded by a furious +cannonade). Lady Southdown, we say, for the sake of the invalid's +health, or for the sake of her soul's ultimate welfare, or for the sake +of her money, agreed to temporise. + +The next day, the great Southdown female family carriage, with the +Earl's coronet and the lozenge (upon which the three lambs trottant +argent upon the field vert of the Southdowns, were quartered with sable +on a bend or, three snuff-mulls gules, the cognizance of the house of +Binkie), drove up in state to Miss Crawley's door, and the tall serious +footman handed in to Mr. Bowls her Ladyship's cards for Miss Crawley, +and one likewise for Miss Briggs. By way of compromise, Lady Emily +sent in a packet in the evening for the latter lady, containing copies +of the "Washerwoman," and other mild and favourite tracts for Miss B.'s +own perusal; and a few for the servants' hall, viz.: "Crumbs from the +Pantry," "The Frying Pan and the Fire," and "The Livery of Sin," of a +much stronger kind. + + + +CHAPTER XXXIV + +James Crawley's Pipe Is Put Out + +The amiable behaviour of Mr. Crawley, and Lady Jane's kind reception of +her, highly flattered Miss Briggs, who was enabled to speak a good word +for the latter, after the cards of the Southdown family had been +presented to Miss Crawley. A Countess's card left personally too for +her, Briggs, was not a little pleasing to the poor friendless +companion. "What could Lady Southdown mean by leaving a card upon you, +I wonder, Miss Briggs?" said the republican Miss Crawley; upon which +the companion meekly said "that she hoped there could be no harm in a +lady of rank taking notice of a poor gentlewoman," and she put away +this card in her work-box amongst her most cherished personal +treasures. Furthermore, Miss Briggs explained how she had met Mr. +Crawley walking with his cousin and long affianced bride the day +before: and she told how kind and gentle-looking the lady was, and +what a plain, not to say common, dress she had, all the articles of +which, from the bonnet down to the boots, she described and estimated +with female accuracy. + +Miss Crawley allowed Briggs to prattle on without interrupting her too +much. As she got well, she was pining for society. Mr. Creamer, her +medical man, would not hear of her returning to her old haunts and +dissipation in London. The old spinster was too glad to find any +companionship at Brighton, and not only were the cards acknowledged the +very next day, but Pitt Crawley was graciously invited to come and see +his aunt. He came, bringing with him Lady Southdown and her daughter. +The dowager did not say a word about the state of Miss Crawley's soul; +but talked with much discretion about the weather: about the war and +the downfall of the monster Bonaparte: and above all, about doctors, +quacks, and the particular merits of Dr. Podgers, whom she then +patronised. + +During their interview Pitt Crawley made a great stroke, and one which +showed that, had his diplomatic career not been blighted by early +neglect, he might have risen to a high rank in his profession. When the +Countess Dowager of Southdown fell foul of the Corsican upstart, as the +fashion was in those days, and showed that he was a monster stained +with every conceivable crime, a coward and a tyrant not fit to live, +one whose fall was predicted, &c., Pitt Crawley suddenly took up the +cudgels in favour of the man of Destiny. He described the First Consul +as he saw him at Paris at the peace of Amiens; when he, Pitt Crawley, +had the gratification of making the acquaintance of the great and good +Mr. Fox, a statesman whom, however much he might differ with him, it +was impossible not to admire fervently--a statesman who had always had +the highest opinion of the Emperor Napoleon. And he spoke in terms of +the strongest indignation of the faithless conduct of the allies +towards this dethroned monarch, who, after giving himself generously up +to their mercy, was consigned to an ignoble and cruel banishment, while +a bigoted Popish rabble was tyrannising over France in his stead. + +This orthodox horror of Romish superstition saved Pitt Crawley in Lady +Southdown's opinion, whilst his admiration for Fox and Napoleon raised +him immeasurably in Miss Crawley's eyes. Her friendship with that +defunct British statesman was mentioned when we first introduced her in +this history. A true Whig, Miss Crawley had been in opposition all +through the war, and though, to be sure, the downfall of the Emperor +did not very much agitate the old lady, or his ill-treatment tend to +shorten her life or natural rest, yet Pitt spoke to her heart when he +lauded both her idols; and by that single speech made immense progress +in her favour. + +"And what do you think, my dear?" Miss Crawley said to the young lady, +for whom she had taken a liking at first sight, as she always did for +pretty and modest young people; though it must be owned her affections +cooled as rapidly as they rose. + +Lady Jane blushed very much, and said "that she did not understand +politics, which she left to wiser heads than hers; but though Mamma +was, no doubt, correct, Mr. Crawley had spoken beautifully." And when +the ladies were retiring at the conclusion of their visit, Miss Crawley +hoped "Lady Southdown would be so kind as to send her Lady Jane +sometimes, if she could be spared to come down and console a poor sick +lonely old woman." This promise was graciously accorded, and they +separated upon great terms of amity. + +"Don't let Lady Southdown come again, Pitt," said the old lady. "She is +stupid and pompous, like all your mother's family, whom I never could +endure. But bring that nice good-natured little Jane as often as ever +you please." Pitt promised that he would do so. He did not tell the +Countess of Southdown what opinion his aunt had formed of her Ladyship, +who, on the contrary, thought that she had made a most delightful and +majestic impression on Miss Crawley. + +And so, nothing loth to comfort a sick lady, and perhaps not sorry in +her heart to be freed now and again from the dreary spouting of the +Reverend Bartholomew Irons, and the serious toadies who gathered round +the footstool of the pompous Countess, her mamma, Lady Jane became a +pretty constant visitor to Miss Crawley, accompanied her in her drives, +and solaced many of her evenings. She was so naturally good and soft, +that even Firkin was not jealous of her; and the gentle Briggs thought +her friend was less cruel to her when kind Lady Jane was by. Towards +her Ladyship Miss Crawley's manners were charming. The old spinster +told her a thousand anecdotes about her youth, talking to her in a very +different strain from that in which she had been accustomed to converse +with the godless little Rebecca; for there was that in Lady Jane's +innocence which rendered light talking impertinence before her, and +Miss Crawley was too much of a gentlewoman to offend such purity. The +young lady herself had never received kindness except from this old +spinster, and her brother and father: and she repaid Miss Crawley's +engoument by artless sweetness and friendship. + +In the autumn evenings (when Rebecca was flaunting at Paris, the gayest +among the gay conquerors there, and our Amelia, our dear wounded +Amelia, ah! where was she?) Lady Jane would be sitting in Miss +Crawley's drawing-room singing sweetly to her, in the twilight, her +little simple songs and hymns, while the sun was setting and the sea +was roaring on the beach. The old spinster used to wake up when these +ditties ceased, and ask for more. As for Briggs, and the quantity of +tears of happiness which she now shed as she pretended to knit, and +looked out at the splendid ocean darkling before the windows, and the +lamps of heaven beginning more brightly to shine--who, I say can +measure the happiness and sensibility of Briggs? + +Pitt meanwhile in the dining-room, with a pamphlet on the Corn Laws or +a Missionary Register by his side, took that kind of recreation which +suits romantic and unromantic men after dinner. He sipped Madeira: +built castles in the air: thought himself a fine fellow: felt himself +much more in love with Jane than he had been any time these seven +years, during which their liaison had lasted without the slightest +impatience on Pitt's part--and slept a good deal. When the time for +coffee came, Mr. Bowls used to enter in a noisy manner, and summon +Squire Pitt, who would be found in the dark very busy with his pamphlet. + +"I wish, my love, I could get somebody to play piquet with me," Miss +Crawley said one night when this functionary made his appearance with +the candles and the coffee. "Poor Briggs can no more play than an owl, +she is so stupid" (the spinster always took an opportunity of abusing +Briggs before the servants); "and I think I should sleep better if I +had my game." + +At this Lady Jane blushed to the tips of her little ears, and down to +the ends of her pretty fingers; and when Mr. Bowls had quitted the +room, and the door was quite shut, she said: + +"Miss Crawley, I can play a little. I used to--to play a little with +poor dear papa." + +"Come and kiss me. Come and kiss me this instant, you dear good little +soul," cried Miss Crawley in an ecstasy: and in this picturesque and +friendly occupation Mr. Pitt found the old lady and the young one, when +he came upstairs with him pamphlet in his hand. How she did blush all +the evening, that poor Lady Jane! + +It must not be imagined that Mr. Pitt Crawley's artifices escaped the +attention of his dear relations at the Rectory at Queen's Crawley. +Hampshire and Sussex lie very close together, and Mrs. Bute had friends +in the latter county who took care to inform her of all, and a great +deal more than all, that passed at Miss Crawley's house at Brighton. +Pitt was there more and more. He did not come for months together to +the Hall, where his abominable old father abandoned himself completely +to rum-and-water, and the odious society of the Horrocks family. Pitt's +success rendered the Rector's family furious, and Mrs. Bute regretted +more (though she confessed less) than ever her monstrous fault in so +insulting Miss Briggs, and in being so haughty and parsimonious to +Bowls and Firkin, that she had not a single person left in Miss +Crawley's household to give her information of what took place there. +"It was all Bute's collar-bone," she persisted in saying; "if that had +not broke, I never would have left her. I am a martyr to duty and to +your odious unclerical habit of hunting, Bute." + +"Hunting; nonsense! It was you that frightened her, Barbara," the +divine interposed. "You're a clever woman, but you've got a devil of a +temper; and you're a screw with your money, Barbara." + +"You'd have been screwed in gaol, Bute, if I had not kept your money." + +"I know I would, my dear," said the Rector, good-naturedly. "You ARE a +clever woman, but you manage too well, you know": and the pious man +consoled himself with a big glass of port. + +"What the deuce can she find in that spooney of a Pitt Crawley?" he +continued. "The fellow has not pluck enough to say Bo to a goose. I +remember when Rawdon, who is a man, and be hanged to him, used to flog +him round the stables as if he was a whipping-top: and Pitt would go +howling home to his ma--ha, ha! Why, either of my boys would whop him +with one hand. Jim says he's remembered at Oxford as Miss Crawley +still--the spooney. + +"I say, Barbara," his reverence continued, after a pause. + +"What?" said Barbara, who was biting her nails, and drumming the table. + +"I say, why not send Jim over to Brighton to see if he can do anything +with the old lady. He's very near getting his degree, you know. He's +only been plucked twice--so was I--but he's had the advantages of +Oxford and a university education. He knows some of the best chaps +there. He pulls stroke in the Boniface boat. He's a handsome feller. +D---- it, ma'am, let's put him on the old woman, hey, and tell him to +thrash Pitt if he says anything. Ha, ha, ha! + +"Jim might go down and see her, certainly," the housewife said; adding +with a sigh, "If we could but get one of the girls into the house; but +she could never endure them, because they are not pretty!" Those +unfortunate and well-educated women made themselves heard from the +neighbouring drawing-room, where they were thrumming away, with hard +fingers, an elaborate music-piece on the piano-forte, as their mother +spoke; and indeed, they were at music, or at backboard, or at +geography, or at history, the whole day long. But what avail all these +accomplishments, in Vanity Fair, to girls who are short, poor, plain, +and have a bad complexion? Mrs. Bute could think of nobody but the +Curate to take one of them off her hands; and Jim coming in from the +stable at this minute, through the parlour window, with a short pipe +stuck in his oilskin cap, he and his father fell to talking about odds +on the St. Leger, and the colloquy between the Rector and his wife +ended. + +Mrs. Bute did not augur much good to the cause from the sending of her +son James as an ambassador, and saw him depart in rather a despairing +mood. Nor did the young fellow himself, when told what his mission was +to be, expect much pleasure or benefit from it; but he was consoled by +the thought that possibly the old lady would give him some handsome +remembrance of her, which would pay a few of his most pressing bills at +the commencement of the ensuing Oxford term, and so took his place by +the coach from Southampton, and was safely landed at Brighton on the +same evening with his portmanteau, his favourite bull-dog Towzer, and +an immense basket of farm and garden produce, from the dear Rectory +folks to the dear Miss Crawley. Considering it was too late to disturb +the invalid lady on the first night of his arrival, he put up at an +inn, and did not wait upon Miss Crawley until a late hour in the noon +of next day. + +James Crawley, when his aunt had last beheld him, was a gawky lad, at +that uncomfortable age when the voice varies between an unearthly +treble and a preternatural bass; when the face not uncommonly blooms +out with appearances for which Rowland's Kalydor is said to act as a +cure; when boys are seen to shave furtively with their sister's +scissors, and the sight of other young women produces intolerable +sensations of terror in them; when the great hands and ankles protrude +a long way from garments which have grown too tight for them; when +their presence after dinner is at once frightful to the ladies, who are +whispering in the twilight in the drawing-room, and inexpressibly +odious to the gentlemen over the mahogany, who are restrained from +freedom of intercourse and delightful interchange of wit by the +presence of that gawky innocence; when, at the conclusion of the second +glass, papa says, "Jack, my boy, go out and see if the evening holds +up," and the youth, willing to be free, yet hurt at not being yet a +man, quits the incomplete banquet. James, then a hobbadehoy, was now +become a young man, having had the benefits of a university education, +and acquired the inestimable polish which is gained by living in a fast +set at a small college, and contracting debts, and being rusticated, +and being plucked. + +He was a handsome lad, however, when he came to present himself to his +aunt at Brighton, and good looks were always a title to the fickle old +lady's favour. Nor did his blushes and awkwardness take away from it: +she was pleased with these healthy tokens of the young gentleman's +ingenuousness. + +He said "he had come down for a couple of days to see a man of his +college, and--and to pay my respects to you, Ma'am, and my father's and +mother's, who hope you are well." + +Pitt was in the room with Miss Crawley when the lad was announced, and +looked very blank when his name was mentioned. The old lady had plenty +of humour, and enjoyed her correct nephew's perplexity. She asked +after all the people at the Rectory with great interest; and said she +was thinking of paying them a visit. She praised the lad to his face, +and said he was well-grown and very much improved, and that it was a +pity his sisters had not some of his good looks; and finding, on +inquiry, that he had taken up his quarters at an hotel, would not hear +of his stopping there, but bade Mr. Bowls send for Mr. James Crawley's +things instantly; "and hark ye, Bowls," she added, with great +graciousness, "you will have the goodness to pay Mr. James's bill." + +She flung Pitt a look of arch triumph, which caused that diplomatist +almost to choke with envy. Much as he had ingratiated himself with his +aunt, she had never yet invited him to stay under her roof, and here +was a young whipper-snapper, who at first sight was made welcome there. + +"I beg your pardon, sir," says Bowls, advancing with a profound bow; +"what 'otel, sir, shall Thomas fetch the luggage from?" + +"O, dam," said young James, starting up, as if in some alarm, "I'll go." + +"What!" said Miss Crawley. + +"The Tom Cribb's Arms," said James, blushing deeply. + +Miss Crawley burst out laughing at this title. Mr. Bowls gave one +abrupt guffaw, as a confidential servant of the family, but choked the +rest of the volley; the diplomatist only smiled. + +"I--I didn't know any better," said James, looking down. "I've never +been here before; it was the coachman told me." The young story-teller! +The fact is, that on the Southampton coach, the day previous, +James Crawley had met the Tutbury Pet, who was coming to Brighton to +make a match with the Rottingdean Fibber; and enchanted by the Pet's +conversation, had passed the evening in company with that scientific +man and his friends, at the inn in question. + +"I--I'd best go and settle the score," James continued. "Couldn't think +of asking you, Ma'am," he added, generously. + +This delicacy made his aunt laugh the more. + +"Go and settle the bill, Bowls," she said, with a wave of her hand, +"and bring it to me." + +Poor lady, she did not know what she had done! "There--there's a +little dawg," said James, looking frightfully guilty. "I'd best go for +him. He bites footmen's calves." + +All the party cried out with laughing at this description; even Briggs +and Lady Jane, who was sitting mute during the interview between Miss +Crawley and her nephew: and Bowls, without a word, quitted the room. + +Still, by way of punishing her elder nephew, Miss Crawley persisted in +being gracious to the young Oxonian. There were no limits to her +kindness or her compliments when they once began. She told Pitt he +might come to dinner, and insisted that James should accompany her in +her drive, and paraded him solemnly up and down the cliff, on the back +seat of the barouche. During all this excursion, she condescended to +say civil things to him: she quoted Italian and French poetry to the +poor bewildered lad, and persisted that he was a fine scholar, and was +perfectly sure he would gain a gold medal, and be a Senior Wrangler. + +"Haw, haw," laughed James, encouraged by these compliments; "Senior +Wrangler, indeed; that's at the other shop." + +"What is the other shop, my dear child?" said the lady. + +"Senior Wranglers at Cambridge, not Oxford," said the scholar, with a +knowing air; and would probably have been more confidential, but that +suddenly there appeared on the cliff in a tax-cart, drawn by a bang-up +pony, dressed in white flannel coats, with mother-of-pearl buttons, his +friends the Tutbury Pet and the Rottingdean Fibber, with three other +gentlemen of their acquaintance, who all saluted poor James there in +the carriage as he sate. This incident damped the ingenuous youth's +spirits, and no word of yea or nay could he be induced to utter during +the rest of the drive. + +On his return he found his room prepared, and his portmanteau ready, +and might have remarked that Mr. Bowls's countenance, when the latter +conducted him to his apartments, wore a look of gravity, wonder, and +compassion. But the thought of Mr. Bowls did not enter his head. He +was deploring the dreadful predicament in which he found himself, in a +house full of old women, jabbering French and Italian, and talking +poetry to him. "Reglarly up a tree, by jingo!" exclaimed the modest +boy, who could not face the gentlest of her sex--not even Briggs--when +she began to talk to him; whereas, put him at Iffley Lock, and he could +out-slang the boldest bargeman. + +At dinner, James appeared choking in a white neckcloth, and had the +honour of handing my Lady Jane downstairs, while Briggs and Mr. Crawley +followed afterwards, conducting the old lady, with her apparatus of +bundles, and shawls, and cushions. Half of Briggs's time at dinner was +spent in superintending the invalid's comfort, and in cutting up +chicken for her fat spaniel. James did not talk much, but he made a +point of asking all the ladies to drink wine, and accepted Mr. +Crawley's challenge, and consumed the greater part of a bottle of +champagne which Mr. Bowls was ordered to produce in his honour. The +ladies having withdrawn, and the two cousins being left together, Pitt, +the ex-diplomatist, he came very communicative and friendly. He asked +after James's career at college--what his prospects in life were--hoped +heartily he would get on; and, in a word, was frank and amiable. +James's tongue unloosed with the port, and he told his cousin his life, +his prospects, his debts, his troubles at the little-go, and his rows +with the proctors, filling rapidly from the bottles before him, and +flying from Port to Madeira with joyous activity. + +"The chief pleasure which my aunt has," said Mr. Crawley, filling his +glass, "is that people should do as they like in her house. This is +Liberty Hall, James, and you can't do Miss Crawley a greater kindness +than to do as you please, and ask for what you will. I know you have +all sneered at me in the country for being a Tory. Miss Crawley is +liberal enough to suit any fancy. She is a Republican in principle, +and despises everything like rank or title." + +"Why are you going to marry an Earl's daughter?" said James. + +"My dear friend, remember it is not poor Lady Jane's fault that she is +well born," Pitt replied, with a courtly air. "She cannot help being a +lady. Besides, I am a Tory, you know." + +"Oh, as for that," said Jim, "there's nothing like old blood; no, +dammy, nothing like it. I'm none of your radicals. I know what it is +to be a gentleman, dammy. See the chaps in a boat-race; look at the +fellers in a fight; aye, look at a dawg killing rats--which is it wins? +the good-blooded ones. Get some more port, Bowls, old boy, whilst I +buzz this bottle here. What was I asaying?" + +"I think you were speaking of dogs killing rats," Pitt remarked mildly, +handing his cousin the decanter to "buzz." + +"Killing rats was I? Well, Pitt, are you a sporting man? Do you want to +see a dawg as CAN kill a rat? If you do, come down with me to Tom +Corduroy's, in Castle Street Mews, and I'll show you such a bull-terrier +as--Pooh! gammon," cried James, bursting out laughing at his +own absurdity--"YOU don't care about a dawg or rat; it's all nonsense. +I'm blest if I think you know the difference between a dog and a duck." + +"No; by the way," Pitt continued with increased blandness, "it was +about blood you were talking, and the personal advantages which people +derive from patrician birth. Here's the fresh bottle." + +"Blood's the word," said James, gulping the ruby fluid down. "Nothing +like blood, sir, in hosses, dawgs, AND men. Why, only last term, just +before I was rusticated, that is, I mean just before I had the measles, +ha, ha--there was me and Ringwood of Christchurch, Bob Ringwood, Lord +Cinqbars' son, having our beer at the Bell at Blenheim, when the +Banbury bargeman offered to fight either of us for a bowl of punch. I +couldn't. My arm was in a sling; couldn't even take the drag down--a +brute of a mare of mine had fell with me only two days before, out with +the Abingdon, and I thought my arm was broke. Well, sir, I couldn't +finish him, but Bob had his coat off at once--he stood up to the +Banbury man for three minutes, and polished him off in four rounds +easy. Gad, how he did drop, sir, and what was it? Blood, sir, all +blood." + +"You don't drink, James," the ex-attache continued. "In my time at +Oxford, the men passed round the bottle a little quicker than you young +fellows seem to do." + +"Come, come," said James, putting his hand to his nose and winking at +his cousin with a pair of vinous eyes, "no jokes, old boy; no trying it +on on me. You want to trot me out, but it's no go. In vino veritas, +old boy. Mars, Bacchus, Apollo virorum, hey? I wish my aunt would send +down some of this to the governor; it's a precious good tap." + +"You had better ask her," Machiavel continued, "or make the best of +your time now. What says the bard? 'Nunc vino pellite curas, Cras +ingens iterabimus aequor,'" and the Bacchanalian, quoting the above +with a House of Commons air, tossed off nearly a thimbleful of wine +with an immense flourish of his glass. + +At the Rectory, when the bottle of port wine was opened after dinner, +the young ladies had each a glass from a bottle of currant wine. Mrs. +Bute took one glass of port, honest James had a couple commonly, but as +his father grew very sulky if he made further inroads on the bottle, +the good lad generally refrained from trying for more, and subsided +either into the currant wine, or to some private gin-and-water in the +stables, which he enjoyed in the company of the coachman and his pipe. +At Oxford, the quantity of wine was unlimited, but the quality was +inferior: but when quantity and quality united as at his aunt's house, +James showed that he could appreciate them indeed; and hardly needed +any of his cousin's encouragement in draining off the second bottle +supplied by Mr. Bowls. + +When the time for coffee came, however, and for a return to the ladies, +of whom he stood in awe, the young gentleman's agreeable frankness left +him, and he relapsed into his usual surly timidity; contenting himself +by saying yes and no, by scowling at Lady Jane, and by upsetting one +cup of coffee during the evening. + +If he did not speak he yawned in a pitiable manner, and his presence +threw a damp upon the modest proceedings of the evening, for Miss +Crawley and Lady Jane at their piquet, and Miss Briggs at her work, +felt that his eyes were wildly fixed on them, and were uneasy under +that maudlin look. + +"He seems a very silent, awkward, bashful lad," said Miss Crawley to +Mr. Pitt. + +"He is more communicative in men's society than with ladies," Machiavel +dryly replied: perhaps rather disappointed that the port wine had not +made Jim speak more. + +He had spent the early part of the next morning in writing home to his +mother a most flourishing account of his reception by Miss Crawley. +But ah! he little knew what evils the day was bringing for him, and how +short his reign of favour was destined to be. A circumstance which Jim +had forgotten--a trivial but fatal circumstance--had taken place at the +Cribb's Arms on the night before he had come to his aunt's house. It +was no other than this--Jim, who was always of a generous disposition, +and when in his cups especially hospitable, had in the course of the +night treated the Tutbury champion and the Rottingdean man, and their +friends, twice or thrice to the refreshment of gin-and-water--so that +no less than eighteen glasses of that fluid at eightpence per glass +were charged in Mr. James Crawley's bill. It was not the amount of +eightpences, but the quantity of gin which told fatally against poor +James's character, when his aunt's butler, Mr. Bowls, went down at his +mistress's request to pay the young gentleman's bill. The landlord, +fearing lest the account should be refused altogether, swore solemnly +that the young gent had consumed personally every farthing's worth of +the liquor: and Bowls paid the bill finally, and showed it on his +return home to Mrs. Firkin, who was shocked at the frightful +prodigality of gin; and took the bill to Miss Briggs as +accountant-general; who thought it her duty to mention the circumstance +to her principal, Miss Crawley. + +Had he drunk a dozen bottles of claret, the old spinster could have +pardoned him. Mr. Fox and Mr. Sheridan drank claret. Gentlemen drank +claret. But eighteen glasses of gin consumed among boxers in an +ignoble pot-house--it was an odious crime and not to be pardoned +readily. Everything went against the lad: he came home perfumed from +the stables, whither he had been to pay his dog Towzer a visit--and +whence he was going to take his friend out for an airing, when he met +Miss Crawley and her wheezy Blenheim spaniel, which Towzer would have +eaten up had not the Blenheim fled squealing to the protection of Miss +Briggs, while the atrocious master of the bull-dog stood laughing at +the horrible persecution. + +This day too the unlucky boy's modesty had likewise forsaken him. He +was lively and facetious at dinner. During the repast he levelled one +or two jokes against Pitt Crawley: he drank as much wine as upon the +previous day; and going quite unsuspiciously to the drawing-room, began +to entertain the ladies there with some choice Oxford stories. He +described the different pugilistic qualities of Molyneux and Dutch Sam, +offered playfully to give Lady Jane the odds upon the Tutbury Pet +against the Rottingdean man, or take them, as her Ladyship chose: and +crowned the pleasantry by proposing to back himself against his cousin +Pitt Crawley, either with or without the gloves. "And that's a fair +offer, my buck," he said, with a loud laugh, slapping Pitt on the +shoulder, "and my father told me to make it too, and he'll go halves in +the bet, ha, ha!" So saying, the engaging youth nodded knowingly at +poor Miss Briggs, and pointed his thumb over his shoulder at Pitt +Crawley in a jocular and exulting manner. + +Pitt was not pleased altogether perhaps, but still not unhappy in the +main. Poor Jim had his laugh out: and staggered across the room with +his aunt's candle, when the old lady moved to retire, and offered to +salute her with the blandest tipsy smile: and he took his own leave +and went upstairs to his bedroom perfectly satisfied with himself, and +with a pleased notion that his aunt's money would be left to him in +preference to his father and all the rest of the family. + +Once up in the bedroom, one would have thought he could not make +matters worse; and yet this unlucky boy did. The moon was shining very +pleasantly out on the sea, and Jim, attracted to the window by the +romantic appearance of the ocean and the heavens, thought he would +further enjoy them while smoking. Nobody would smell the tobacco, he +thought, if he cunningly opened the window and kept his head and pipe +in the fresh air. This he did: but being in an excited state, poor Jim +had forgotten that his door was open all this time, so that the breeze +blowing inwards and a fine thorough draught being established, the +clouds of tobacco were carried downstairs, and arrived with quite +undiminished fragrance to Miss Crawley and Miss Briggs. + +The pipe of tobacco finished the business: and the Bute-Crawleys never +knew how many thousand pounds it cost them. Firkin rushed downstairs +to Bowls who was reading out the "Fire and the Frying Pan" to his +aide-de-camp in a loud and ghostly voice. The dreadful secret was told +to him by Firkin with so frightened a look, that for the first moment +Mr. Bowls and his young man thought that robbers were in the house, the +legs of whom had probably been discovered by the woman under Miss +Crawley's bed. When made aware of the fact, however--to rush upstairs +at three steps at a time to enter the unconscious James's apartment, +calling out, "Mr. James," in a voice stifled with alarm, and to cry, +"For Gawd's sake, sir, stop that 'ere pipe," was the work of a minute +with Mr. Bowls. "O, Mr. James, what 'AVE you done!" he said in a voice +of the deepest pathos, as he threw the implement out of the window. +"What 'ave you done, sir! Missis can't abide 'em." + +"Missis needn't smoke," said James with a frantic misplaced laugh, and +thought the whole matter an excellent joke. But his feelings were very +different in the morning, when Mr. Bowls's young man, who operated upon +Mr. James's boots, and brought him his hot water to shave that beard +which he was so anxiously expecting, handed a note in to Mr. James in +bed, in the handwriting of Miss Briggs. + +"Dear sir," it said, "Miss Crawley has passed an exceedingly disturbed +night, owing to the shocking manner in which the house has been +polluted by tobacco; Miss Crawley bids me say she regrets that she is +too unwell to see you before you go--and above all that she ever +induced you to remove from the ale-house, where she is sure you will be +much more comfortable during the rest of your stay at Brighton." + +And herewith honest James's career as a candidate for his aunt's favour +ended. He had in fact, and without knowing it, done what he menaced to +do. He had fought his cousin Pitt with the gloves. + +Where meanwhile was he who had been once first favourite for this race +for money? Becky and Rawdon, as we have seen, were come together after +Waterloo, and were passing the winter of 1815 at Paris in great +splendour and gaiety. Rebecca was a good economist, and the price poor +Jos Sedley had paid for her two horses was in itself sufficient to keep +their little establishment afloat for a year, at the least; there was +no occasion to turn into money "my pistols, the same which I shot +Captain Marker," or the gold dressing-case, or the cloak lined with +sable. Becky had it made into a pelisse for herself, in which she rode +in the Bois de Boulogne to the admiration of all: and you should have +seen the scene between her and her delighted husband, whom she rejoined +after the army had entered Cambray, and when she unsewed herself, and +let out of her dress all those watches, knick-knacks, bank-notes, +cheques, and valuables, which she had secreted in the wadding, previous +to her meditated flight from Brussels! Tufto was charmed, and Rawdon +roared with delighted laughter, and swore that she was better than any +play he ever saw, by Jove. And the way in which she jockeyed Jos, and +which she described with infinite fun, carried up his delight to a +pitch of quite insane enthusiasm. He believed in his wife as much as +the French soldiers in Napoleon. + +Her success in Paris was remarkable. All the French ladies voted her +charming. She spoke their language admirably. She adopted at once +their grace, their liveliness, their manner. Her husband was stupid +certainly--all English are stupid--and, besides, a dull husband at +Paris is always a point in a lady's favour. He was the heir of the +rich and spirituelle Miss Crawley, whose house had been open to so many +of the French noblesse during the emigration. They received the +colonel's wife in their own hotels--"Why," wrote a great lady to Miss +Crawley, who had bought her lace and trinkets at the Duchess's own +price, and given her many a dinner during the pinching times after the +Revolution--"Why does not our dear Miss come to her nephew and niece, +and her attached friends in Paris? All the world raffoles of the +charming Mistress and her espiegle beauty. Yes, we see in her the +grace, the charm, the wit of our dear friend Miss Crawley! The King +took notice of her yesterday at the Tuileries, and we are all jealous +of the attention which Monsieur pays her. If you could have seen the +spite of a certain stupid Miladi Bareacres (whose eagle-beak and toque +and feathers may be seen peering over the heads of all assemblies) when +Madame, the Duchess of Angouleme, the august daughter and companion of +kings, desired especially to be presented to Mrs. Crawley, as your dear +daughter and protegee, and thanked her in the name of France, for all +your benevolence towards our unfortunates during their exile! She is of +all the societies, of all the balls--of the balls--yes--of the dances, +no; and yet how interesting and pretty this fair creature looks +surrounded by the homage of the men, and so soon to be a mother! To +hear her speak of you, her protectress, her mother, would bring tears +to the eyes of ogres. How she loves you! how we all love our +admirable, our respectable Miss Crawley!" + +It is to be feared that this letter of the Parisian great lady did not +by any means advance Mrs. Becky's interest with her admirable, her +respectable, relative. On the contrary, the fury of the old spinster +was beyond bounds, when she found what was Rebecca's situation, and how +audaciously she had made use of Miss Crawley's name, to get an entree +into Parisian society. Too much shaken in mind and body to compose a +letter in the French language in reply to that of her correspondent, +she dictated to Briggs a furious answer in her own native tongue, +repudiating Mrs. Rawdon Crawley altogether, and warning the public to +beware of her as a most artful and dangerous person. But as Madame the +Duchess of X--had only been twenty years in England, she did not +understand a single word of the language, and contented herself by +informing Mrs. Rawdon Crawley at their next meeting, that she had +received a charming letter from that chere Mees, and that it was full +of benevolent things for Mrs. Crawley, who began seriously to have +hopes that the spinster would relent. + +Meanwhile, she was the gayest and most admired of Englishwomen: and +had a little European congress on her reception-night. Prussians and +Cossacks, Spanish and English--all the world was at Paris during this +famous winter: to have seen the stars and cordons in Rebecca's humble +saloon would have made all Baker Street pale with envy. Famous warriors +rode by her carriage in the Bois, or crowded her modest little box at +the Opera. Rawdon was in the highest spirits. There were no duns in +Paris as yet: there were parties every day at Very's or Beauvilliers'; +play was plentiful and his luck good. Tufto perhaps was sulky. Mrs. +Tufto had come over to Paris at her own invitation, and besides this +contretemps, there were a score of generals now round Becky's chair, +and she might take her choice of a dozen bouquets when she went to the +play. Lady Bareacres and the chiefs of the English society, stupid and +irreproachable females, writhed with anguish at the success of the +little upstart Becky, whose poisoned jokes quivered and rankled in +their chaste breasts. But she had all the men on her side. She fought +the women with indomitable courage, and they could not talk scandal in +any tongue but their own. + +So in fetes, pleasures, and prosperity, the winter of 1815-16 passed +away with Mrs. Rawdon Crawley, who accommodated herself to polite life +as if her ancestors had been people of fashion for centuries past--and +who from her wit, talent, and energy, indeed merited a place of honour +in Vanity Fair. In the early spring of 1816, Galignani's Journal +contained the following announcement in an interesting corner of the +paper: "On the 26th of March--the Lady of Lieutenant-Colonel Crawley, +of the Life Guards Green--of a son and heir." + +This event was copied into the London papers, out of which Miss Briggs +read the statement to Miss Crawley, at breakfast, at Brighton. The +intelligence, expected as it might have been, caused a crisis in the +affairs of the Crawley family. The spinster's rage rose to its height, +and sending instantly for Pitt, her nephew, and for the Lady Southdown, +from Brunswick Square, she requested an immediate celebration of the +marriage which had been so long pending between the two families. And +she announced that it was her intention to allow the young couple a +thousand a year during her lifetime, at the expiration of which the +bulk of her property would be settled upon her nephew and her dear +niece, Lady Jane Crawley. Waxy came down to ratify the deeds--Lord +Southdown gave away his sister--she was married by a Bishop, and not by +the Rev. Bartholomew Irons--to the disappointment of the irregular +prelate. + +When they were married, Pitt would have liked to take a hymeneal tour +with his bride, as became people of their condition. But the affection +of the old lady towards Lady Jane had grown so strong, that she fairly +owned she could not part with her favourite. Pitt and his wife came +therefore and lived with Miss Crawley: and (greatly to the annoyance of +poor Pitt, who conceived himself a most injured character--being +subject to the humours of his aunt on one side, and of his +mother-in-law on the other). Lady Southdown, from her neighbouring +house, reigned over the whole family--Pitt, Lady Jane, Miss Crawley, +Briggs, Bowls, Firkin, and all. She pitilessly dosed them with her +tracts and her medicine, she dismissed Creamer, she installed Rodgers, +and soon stripped Miss Crawley of even the semblance of authority. The +poor soul grew so timid that she actually left off bullying Briggs any +more, and clung to her niece, more fond and terrified every day. Peace +to thee, kind and selfish, vain and generous old heathen!--We shall see +thee no more. Let us hope that Lady Jane supported her kindly, and led +her with gentle hand out of the busy struggle of Vanity Fair. + + + +CHAPTER XXXV + +Widow and Mother + +The news of the great fights of Quatre Bras and Waterloo reached +England at the same time. The Gazette first published the result of +the two battles; at which glorious intelligence all England thrilled +with triumph and fear. Particulars then followed; and after the +announcement of the victories came the list of the wounded and the +slain. Who can tell the dread with which that catalogue was opened and +read! Fancy, at every village and homestead almost through the three +kingdoms, the great news coming of the battles in Flanders, and the +feelings of exultation and gratitude, bereavement and sickening dismay, +when the lists of the regimental losses were gone through, and it +became known whether the dear friend and relative had escaped or +fallen. Anybody who will take the trouble of looking back to a file of +the newspapers of the time, must, even now, feel at second-hand this +breathless pause of expectation. The lists of casualties are carried +on from day to day: you stop in the midst as in a story which is to be +continued in our next. Think what the feelings must have been as those +papers followed each other fresh from the press; and if such an +interest could be felt in our country, and about a battle where but +twenty thousand of our people were engaged, think of the condition of +Europe for twenty years before, where people were fighting, not by +thousands, but by millions; each one of whom as he struck his enemy +wounded horribly some other innocent heart far away. + +The news which that famous Gazette brought to the Osbornes gave a +dreadful shock to the family and its chief. The girls indulged +unrestrained in their grief. The gloom-stricken old father was still +more borne down by his fate and sorrow. He strove to think that a +judgment was on the boy for his disobedience. He dared not own that +the severity of the sentence frightened him, and that its fulfilment +had come too soon upon his curses. Sometimes a shuddering terror +struck him, as if he had been the author of the doom which he had +called down on his son. There was a chance before of reconciliation. +The boy's wife might have died; or he might have come back and said, +Father I have sinned. But there was no hope now. He stood on the +other side of the gulf impassable, haunting his parent with sad eyes. +He remembered them once before so in a fever, when every one thought +the lad was dying, and he lay on his bed speechless, and gazing with a +dreadful gloom. Good God! how the father clung to the doctor then, and +with what a sickening anxiety he followed him: what a weight of grief +was off his mind when, after the crisis of the fever, the lad +recovered, and looked at his father once more with eyes that recognised +him. But now there was no help or cure, or chance of reconcilement: +above all, there were no humble words to soothe vanity outraged and +furious, or bring to its natural flow the poisoned, angry blood. And +it is hard to say which pang it was that tore the proud father's heart +most keenly--that his son should have gone out of the reach of his +forgiveness, or that the apology which his own pride expected should +have escaped him. + +Whatever his sensations might have been, however, the stern old man +would have no confidant. He never mentioned his son's name to his +daughters; but ordered the elder to place all the females of the +establishment in mourning; and desired that the male servants should be +similarly attired in deep black. All parties and entertainments, of +course, were to be put off. No communications were made to his future +son-in-law, whose marriage-day had been fixed: but there was enough in +Mr. Osborne's appearance to prevent Mr. Bullock from making any +inquiries, or in any way pressing forward that ceremony. He and the +ladies whispered about it under their voices in the drawing-room +sometimes, whither the father never came. He remained constantly in +his own study; the whole front part of the house being closed until +some time after the completion of the general mourning. + +About three weeks after the 18th of June, Mr. Osborne's acquaintance, +Sir William Dobbin, called at Mr. Osborne's house in Russell Square, +with a very pale and agitated face, and insisted upon seeing that +gentleman. Ushered into his room, and after a few words, which neither +the speaker nor the host understood, the former produced from an +inclosure a letter sealed with a large red seal. "My son, Major +Dobbin," the Alderman said, with some hesitation, "despatched me a +letter by an officer of the --th, who arrived in town to-day. My son's +letter contains one for you, Osborne." The Alderman placed the letter +on the table, and Osborne stared at him for a moment or two in silence. +His looks frightened the ambassador, who after looking guiltily for a +little time at the grief-stricken man, hurried away without another +word. + +The letter was in George's well-known bold handwriting. It was that one +which he had written before daybreak on the 16th of June, and just +before he took leave of Amelia. The great red seal was emblazoned with +the sham coat of arms which Osborne had assumed from the Peerage, with +"Pax in bello" for a motto; that of the ducal house with which the vain +old man tried to fancy himself connected. The hand that signed it would +never hold pen or sword more. The very seal that sealed it had been +robbed from George's dead body as it lay on the field of battle. The +father knew nothing of this, but sat and looked at the letter in +terrified vacancy. He almost fell when he went to open it. + +Have you ever had a difference with a dear friend? How his letters, +written in the period of love and confidence, sicken and rebuke you! +What a dreary mourning it is to dwell upon those vehement protests of +dead affection! What lying epitaphs they make over the corpse of love! +What dark, cruel comments upon Life and Vanities! Most of us have got +or written drawers full of them. They are closet-skeletons which we +keep and shun. Osborne trembled long before the letter from his dead +son. + +The poor boy's letter did not say much. He had been too proud to +acknowledge the tenderness which his heart felt. He only said, that on +the eve of a great battle, he wished to bid his father farewell, and +solemnly to implore his good offices for the wife--it might be for the +child--whom he left behind him. He owned with contrition that his +irregularities and his extravagance had already wasted a large part of +his mother's little fortune. He thanked his father for his former +generous conduct; and he promised him that if he fell on the field or +survived it, he would act in a manner worthy of the name of George +Osborne. + +His English habit, pride, awkwardness perhaps, had prevented him from +saying more. His father could not see the kiss George had placed on +the superscription of his letter. Mr. Osborne dropped it with the +bitterest, deadliest pang of balked affection and revenge. His son was +still beloved and unforgiven. + +About two months afterwards, however, as the young ladies of the family +went to church with their father, they remarked how he took a different +seat from that which he usually occupied when he chose to attend divine +worship; and that from his cushion opposite, he looked up at the wall +over their heads. This caused the young women likewise to gaze in the +direction towards which their father's gloomy eyes pointed: and they +saw an elaborate monument upon the wall, where Britannia was +represented weeping over an urn, and a broken sword and a couchant lion +indicated that the piece of sculpture had been erected in honour of a +deceased warrior. The sculptors of those days had stocks of such +funereal emblems in hand; as you may see still on the walls of St. +Paul's, which are covered with hundreds of these braggart heathen +allegories. There was a constant demand for them during the first +fifteen years of the present century. + +Under the memorial in question were emblazoned the well-known and +pompous Osborne arms; and the inscription said, that the monument was +"Sacred to the memory of George Osborne, Junior, Esq., late a Captain +in his Majesty's --th regiment of foot, who fell on the 18th of June, +1815, aged 28 years, while fighting for his king and country in the +glorious victory of Waterloo. Dulce et decorum est pro patria mori." + +The sight of that stone agitated the nerves of the sisters so much, +that Miss Maria was compelled to leave the church. The congregation +made way respectfully for those sobbing girls clothed in deep black, +and pitied the stern old father seated opposite the memorial of the +dead soldier. "Will he forgive Mrs. George?" the girls said to +themselves as soon as their ebullition of grief was over. Much +conversation passed too among the acquaintances of the Osborne family, +who knew of the rupture between the son and father caused by the +former's marriage, as to the chance of a reconciliation with the young +widow. There were bets among the gentlemen both about Russell Square +and in the City. + +If the sisters had any anxiety regarding the possible recognition of +Amelia as a daughter of the family, it was increased presently, and +towards the end of the autumn, by their father's announcement that he +was going abroad. He did not say whither, but they knew at once that +his steps would be turned towards Belgium, and were aware that George's +widow was still in Brussels. They had pretty accurate news indeed of +poor Amelia from Lady Dobbin and her daughters. Our honest Captain had +been promoted in consequence of the death of the second Major of the +regiment on the field; and the brave O'Dowd, who had distinguished +himself greatly here as upon all occasions where he had a chance to +show his coolness and valour, was a Colonel and Companion of the Bath. + +Very many of the brave --th, who had suffered severely upon both days +of action, were still at Brussels in the autumn, recovering of their +wounds. The city was a vast military hospital for months after the +great battles; and as men and officers began to rally from their hurts, +the gardens and places of public resort swarmed with maimed warriors, +old and young, who, just rescued out of death, fell to gambling, and +gaiety, and love-making, as people of Vanity Fair will do. Mr. Osborne +found out some of the --th easily. He knew their uniform quite well, +and had been used to follow all the promotions and exchanges in the +regiment, and loved to talk about it and its officers as if he had been +one of the number. On the day after his arrival at Brussels, and as he +issued from his hotel, which faced the park, he saw a soldier in the +well-known facings, reposing on a stone bench in the garden, and went +and sate down trembling by the wounded convalescent man. + +"Were you in Captain Osborne's company?" he said, and added, after a +pause, "he was my son, sir." + +The man was not of the Captain's company, but he lifted up his +unwounded arm and touched his cap sadly and respectfully to the haggard +broken-spirited gentleman who questioned him. "The whole army didn't +contain a finer or a better officer," the soldier said. "The Sergeant +of the Captain's company (Captain Raymond had it now), was in town, +though, and was just well of a shot in the shoulder. His honour might +see him if he liked, who could tell him anything he wanted to know +about--about the --th's actions. But his honour had seen Major Dobbin, +no doubt, the brave Captain's great friend; and Mrs. Osborne, who was +here too, and had been very bad, he heard everybody say. They say she +was out of her mind like for six weeks or more. But your honour knows +all about that--and asking your pardon"--the man added. + +Osborne put a guinea into the soldier's hand, and told him he should +have another if he would bring the Sergeant to the Hotel du Parc; a +promise which very soon brought the desired officer to Mr. Osborne's +presence. And the first soldier went away; and after telling a comrade +or two how Captain Osborne's father was arrived, and what a free-handed +generous gentleman he was, they went and made good cheer with drink and +feasting, as long as the guineas lasted which had come from the proud +purse of the mourning old father. + +In the Sergeant's company, who was also just convalescent, Osborne made +the journey of Waterloo and Quatre Bras, a journey which thousands of +his countrymen were then taking. He took the Sergeant with him in his +carriage, and went through both fields under his guidance. He saw the +point of the road where the regiment marched into action on the 16th, +and the slope down which they drove the French cavalry who were +pressing on the retreating Belgians. There was the spot where the +noble Captain cut down the French officer who was grappling with the +young Ensign for the colours, the Colour-Sergeants having been shot +down. Along this road they retreated on the next day, and here was the +bank at which the regiment bivouacked under the rain of the night of +the seventeenth. Further on was the position which they took and held +during the day, forming time after time to receive the charge of the +enemy's horsemen and lying down under the shelter of the bank from the +furious French cannonade. And it was at this declivity when at evening +the whole English line received the order to advance, as the enemy fell +back after his last charge, that the Captain, hurraying and rushing +down the hill waving his sword, received a shot and fell dead. "It was +Major Dobbin who took back the Captain's body to Brussels," the +Sergeant said, in a low voice, "and had him buried, as your honour +knows." The peasants and relic-hunters about the place were screaming +round the pair, as the soldier told his story, offering for sale all +sorts of mementoes of the fight, crosses, and epaulets, and shattered +cuirasses, and eagles. + +Osborne gave a sumptuous reward to the Sergeant when he parted with +him, after having visited the scenes of his son's last exploits. His +burial-place he had already seen. Indeed, he had driven thither +immediately after his arrival at Brussels. George's body lay in the +pretty burial-ground of Laeken, near the city; in which place, having +once visited it on a party of pleasure, he had lightly expressed a wish +to have his grave made. And there the young officer was laid by his +friend, in the unconsecrated corner of the garden, separated by a +little hedge from the temples and towers and plantations of flowers and +shrubs, under which the Roman Catholic dead repose. It seemed a +humiliation to old Osborne to think that his son, an English gentleman, +a captain in the famous British army, should not be found worthy to lie +in ground where mere foreigners were buried. Which of us is there can +tell how much vanity lurks in our warmest regard for others, and how +selfish our love is? Old Osborne did not speculate much upon the +mingled nature of his feelings, and how his instinct and selfishness +were combating together. He firmly believed that everything he did was +right, that he ought on all occasions to have his own way--and like the +sting of a wasp or serpent his hatred rushed out armed and poisonous +against anything like opposition. He was proud of his hatred as of +everything else. Always to be right, always to trample forward, and +never to doubt, are not these the great qualities with which dullness +takes the lead in the world? + +As after the drive to Waterloo, Mr. Osborne's carriage was nearing the +gates of the city at sunset, they met another open barouche, in which +were a couple of ladies and a gentleman, and by the side of which an +officer was riding. Osborne gave a start back, and the Sergeant, +seated with him, cast a look of surprise at his neighbour, as he +touched his cap to the officer, who mechanically returned his salute. +It was Amelia, with the lame young Ensign by her side, and opposite to +her her faithful friend Mrs. O'Dowd. It was Amelia, but how changed +from the fresh and comely girl Osborne knew. Her face was white and +thin. Her pretty brown hair was parted under a widow's cap--the poor +child. Her eyes were fixed, and looking nowhere. They stared blank in +the face of Osborne, as the carriages crossed each other, but she did +not know him; nor did he recognise her, until looking up, he saw Dobbin +riding by her: and then he knew who it was. He hated her. He did not +know how much until he saw her there. When her carriage had passed on, +he turned and stared at the Sergeant, with a curse and defiance in his +eye cast at his companion, who could not help looking at him--as much +as to say "How dare you look at me? Damn you! I do hate her. It is +she who has tumbled my hopes and all my pride down." "Tell the +scoundrel to drive on quick," he shouted with an oath, to the lackey on +the box. A minute afterwards, a horse came clattering over the pavement +behind Osborne's carriage, and Dobbin rode up. His thoughts had been +elsewhere as the carriages passed each other, and it was not until he +had ridden some paces forward, that he remembered it was Osborne who +had just passed him. Then he turned to examine if the sight of her +father-in-law had made any impression on Amelia, but the poor girl did +not know who had passed. Then William, who daily used to accompany her +in his drives, taking out his watch, made some excuse about an +engagement which he suddenly recollected, and so rode off. She did not +remark that either: but sate looking before her, over the homely +landscape towards the woods in the distance, by which George marched +away. + +"Mr. Osborne, Mr. Osborne!" cried Dobbin, as he rode up and held out +his hand. Osborne made no motion to take it, but shouted out once more +and with another curse to his servant to drive on. + +Dobbin laid his hand on the carriage side. "I will see you, sir," he +said. "I have a message for you." + +"From that woman?" said Osborne, fiercely. + +"No," replied the other, "from your son"; at which Osborne fell back +into the corner of his carriage, and Dobbin allowing it to pass on, +rode close behind it, and so through the town until they reached Mr. +Osborne's hotel, and without a word. There he followed Osborne up to +his apartments. George had often been in the rooms; they were the +lodgings which the Crawleys had occupied during their stay in Brussels. + +"Pray, have you any commands for me, Captain Dobbin, or, I beg your +pardon, I should say MAJOR Dobbin, since better men than you are dead, +and you step into their SHOES?" said Mr. Osborne, in that sarcastic +tone which he sometimes was pleased to assume. + +"Better men ARE dead," Dobbin replied. "I want to speak to you about +one." + +"Make it short, sir," said the other with an oath, scowling at his +visitor. + +"I am here as his closest friend," the Major resumed, "and the executor +of his will. He made it before he went into action. Are you aware how +small his means are, and of the straitened circumstances of his widow?" + +"I don't know his widow, sir," Osborne said. "Let her go back to her +father." But the gentleman whom he addressed was determined to remain +in good temper, and went on without heeding the interruption. + +"Do you know, sir, Mrs. Osborne's condition? Her life and her reason +almost have been shaken by the blow which has fallen on her. It is +very doubtful whether she will rally. There is a chance left for her, +however, and it is about this I came to speak to you. She will be a +mother soon. Will you visit the parent's offence upon the child's +head? or will you forgive the child for poor George's sake?" + +Osborne broke out into a rhapsody of self-praise and imprecations;--by +the first, excusing himself to his own conscience for his conduct; by +the second, exaggerating the undutifulness of George. No father in all +England could have behaved more generously to a son, who had rebelled +against him wickedly. He had died without even so much as confessing +he was wrong. Let him take the consequences of his undutifulness and +folly. As for himself, Mr. Osborne, he was a man of his word. He had +sworn never to speak to that woman, or to recognize her as his son's +wife. "And that's what you may tell her," he concluded with an oath; +"and that's what I will stick to to the last day of my life." + +There was no hope from that quarter then. The widow must live on her +slender pittance, or on such aid as Jos could give her. "I might tell +her, and she would not heed it," thought Dobbin, sadly: for the poor +girl's thoughts were not here at all since her catastrophe, and, +stupefied under the pressure of her sorrow, good and evil were alike +indifferent to her. + +So, indeed, were even friendship and kindness. She received them both +uncomplainingly, and having accepted them, relapsed into her grief. + +Suppose some twelve months after the above conversation took place to +have passed in the life of our poor Amelia. She has spent the first +portion of that time in a sorrow so profound and pitiable, that we who +have been watching and describing some of the emotions of that weak and +tender heart, must draw back in the presence of the cruel grief under +which it is bleeding. Tread silently round the hapless couch of the +poor prostrate soul. Shut gently the door of the dark chamber wherein +she suffers, as those kind people did who nursed her through the first +months of her pain, and never left her until heaven had sent her +consolation. A day came--of almost terrified delight and wonder--when +the poor widowed girl pressed a child upon her breast--a child, with +the eyes of George who was gone--a little boy, as beautiful as a +cherub. What a miracle it was to hear its first cry! How she laughed +and wept over it--how love, and hope, and prayer woke again in her +bosom as the baby nestled there. She was safe. The doctors who +attended her, and had feared for her life or for her brain, had waited +anxiously for this crisis before they could pronounce that either was +secure. It was worth the long months of doubt and dread which the +persons who had constantly been with her had passed, to see her eyes +once more beaming tenderly upon them. + +Our friend Dobbin was one of them. It was he who brought her back to +England and to her mother's house; when Mrs. O'Dowd, receiving a +peremptory summons from her Colonel, had been forced to quit her +patient. To see Dobbin holding the infant, and to hear Amelia's laugh +of triumph as she watched him, would have done any man good who had a +sense of humour. William was the godfather of the child, and exerted +his ingenuity in the purchase of cups, spoons, pap-boats, and corals +for this little Christian. + +How his mother nursed him, and dressed him, and lived upon him; how she +drove away all nurses, and would scarce allow any hand but her own to +touch him; how she considered that the greatest favour she could confer +upon his godfather, Major Dobbin, was to allow the Major occasionally +to dandle him, need not be told here. This child was her being. Her +existence was a maternal caress. She enveloped the feeble and +unconscious creature with love and worship. It was her life which the +baby drank in from her bosom. Of nights, and when alone, she had +stealthy and intense raptures of motherly love, such as God's +marvellous care has awarded to the female instinct--joys how far +higher and lower than reason--blind beautiful devotions which only +women's hearts know. It was William Dobbin's task to muse upon these +movements of Amelia's, and to watch her heart; and if his love made him +divine almost all the feelings which agitated it, alas! he could see +with a fatal perspicuity that there was no place there for him. And +so, gently, he bore his fate, knowing it, and content to bear it. + +I suppose Amelia's father and mother saw through the intentions of the +Major, and were not ill-disposed to encourage him; for Dobbin visited +their house daily, and stayed for hours with them, or with Amelia, or +with the honest landlord, Mr. Clapp, and his family. He brought, on +one pretext or another, presents to everybody, and almost every day; +and went, with the landlord's little girl, who was rather a favourite +with Amelia, by the name of Major Sugarplums. It was this little child +who commonly acted as mistress of the ceremonies to introduce him to +Mrs. Osborne. She laughed one day when Major Sugarplums' cab drove up +to Fulham, and he descended from it, bringing out a wooden horse, a +drum, a trumpet, and other warlike toys, for little Georgy, who was +scarcely six months old, and for whom the articles in question were +entirely premature. + +The child was asleep. "Hush," said Amelia, annoyed, perhaps, at the +creaking of the Major's boots; and she held out her hand; smiling +because William could not take it until he had rid himself of his cargo +of toys. "Go downstairs, little Mary," said he presently to the child, +"I want to speak to Mrs. Osborne." She looked up rather astonished, and +laid down the infant on its bed. + +"I am come to say good-bye, Amelia," said he, taking her slender little +white hand gently. + +"Good-bye? and where are you going?" she said, with a smile. + +"Send the letters to the agents," he said; "they will forward them; for +you will write to me, won't you? I shall be away a long time." + +"I'll write to you about Georgy," she said. "Dear William, how good +you have been to him and to me. Look at him. Isn't he like an angel?" + +The little pink hands of the child closed mechanically round the honest +soldier's finger, and Amelia looked up in his face with bright maternal +pleasure. The cruellest looks could not have wounded him more than +that glance of hopeless kindness. He bent over the child and mother. +He could not speak for a moment. And it was only with all his strength +that he could force himself to say a God bless you. "God bless you," +said Amelia, and held up her face and kissed him. + +"Hush! Don't wake Georgy!" she added, as William Dobbin went to the +door with heavy steps. She did not hear the noise of his cab-wheels as +he drove away: she was looking at the child, who was laughing in his +sleep. + + + +CHAPTER XXXVI + +How to Live Well on Nothing a Year + +I suppose there is no man in this Vanity Fair of ours so little +observant as not to think sometimes about the worldly affairs of his +acquaintances, or so extremely charitable as not to wonder how his +neighbour Jones, or his neighbour Smith, can make both ends meet at the +end of the year. With the utmost regard for the family, for instance +(for I dine with them twice or thrice in the season), I cannot but own +that the appearance of the Jenkinses in the park, in the large barouche +with the grenadier-footmen, will surprise and mystify me to my dying +day: for though I know the equipage is only jobbed, and all the +Jenkins people are on board wages, yet those three men and the carriage +must represent an expense of six hundred a year at the very least--and +then there are the splendid dinners, the two boys at Eton, the prize +governess and masters for the girls, the trip abroad, or to Eastbourne +or Worthing, in the autumn, the annual ball with a supper from Gunter's +(who, by the way, supplies most of the first-rate dinners which J. +gives, as I know very well, having been invited to one of them to fill +a vacant place, when I saw at once that these repasts are very superior +to the common run of entertainments for which the humbler sort of J.'s +acquaintances get cards)--who, I say, with the most good-natured +feelings in the world, can help wondering how the Jenkinses make out +matters? What is Jenkins? We all know--Commissioner of the Tape and +Sealing Wax Office, with 1200 pounds a year for a salary. Had his wife +a private fortune? Pooh!--Miss Flint--one of eleven children of a small +squire in Buckinghamshire. All she ever gets from her family is a +turkey at Christmas, in exchange for which she has to board two or +three of her sisters in the off season, and lodge and feed her brothers +when they come to town. How does Jenkins balance his income? I say, as +every friend of his must say, How is it that he has not been outlawed +long since, and that he ever came back (as he did to the surprise of +everybody) last year from Boulogne? + +"I" is here introduced to personify the world in general--the Mrs. +Grundy of each respected reader's private circle--every one of whom can +point to some families of his acquaintance who live nobody knows how. +Many a glass of wine have we all of us drunk, I have very little doubt, +hob-and-nobbing with the hospitable giver and wondering how the deuce +he paid for it. + +Some three or four years after his stay in Paris, when Rawdon Crawley +and his wife were established in a very small comfortable house in +Curzon Street, May Fair, there was scarcely one of the numerous friends +whom they entertained at dinner that did not ask the above question +regarding them. The novelist, it has been said before, knows +everything, and as I am in a situation to be able to tell the public +how Crawley and his wife lived without any income, may I entreat the +public newspapers which are in the habit of extracting portions of the +various periodical works now published not to reprint the following +exact narrative and calculations--of which I ought, as the discoverer +(and at some expense, too), to have the benefit? My son, I would say, +were I blessed with a child--you may by deep inquiry and constant +intercourse with him learn how a man lives comfortably on nothing a +year. But it is best not to be intimate with gentlemen of this +profession and to take the calculations at second hand, as you do +logarithms, for to work them yourself, depend upon it, will cost you +something considerable. + +On nothing per annum then, and during a course of some two or three +years, of which we can afford to give but a very brief history, Crawley +and his wife lived very happily and comfortably at Paris. It was in +this period that he quitted the Guards and sold out of the army. When +we find him again, his mustachios and the title of Colonel on his card +are the only relics of his military profession. + +It has been mentioned that Rebecca, soon after her arrival in Paris, +took a very smart and leading position in the society of that capital, +and was welcomed at some of the most distinguished houses of the +restored French nobility. The English men of fashion in Paris courted +her, too, to the disgust of the ladies their wives, who could not bear +the parvenue. For some months the salons of the Faubourg St. Germain, +in which her place was secured, and the splendours of the new Court, +where she was received with much distinction, delighted and perhaps a +little intoxicated Mrs. Crawley, who may have been disposed during this +period of elation to slight the people--honest young military men +mostly--who formed her husband's chief society. + +But the Colonel yawned sadly among the Duchesses and great ladies of +the Court. The old women who played ecarte made such a noise about a +five-franc piece that it was not worth Colonel Crawley's while to sit +down at a card-table. The wit of their conversation he could not +appreciate, being ignorant of their language. And what good could his +wife get, he urged, by making curtsies every night to a whole circle of +Princesses? He left Rebecca presently to frequent these parties alone, +resuming his own simple pursuits and amusements amongst the amiable +friends of his own choice. + +The truth is, when we say of a gentleman that he lives elegantly on +nothing a year, we use the word "nothing" to signify something unknown; +meaning, simply, that we don't know how the gentleman in question +defrays the expenses of his establishment. Now, our friend the Colonel +had a great aptitude for all games of chance: and exercising himself, +as he continually did, with the cards, the dice-box, or the cue, it is +natural to suppose that he attained a much greater skill in the use of +these articles than men can possess who only occasionally handle them. +To use a cue at billiards well is like using a pencil, or a German +flute, or a small-sword--you cannot master any one of these implements +at first, and it is only by repeated study and perseverance, joined to +a natural taste, that a man can excel in the handling of either. Now +Crawley, from being only a brilliant amateur, had grown to be a +consummate master of billiards. Like a great General, his genius used +to rise with the danger, and when the luck had been unfavourable to him +for a whole game, and the bets were consequently against him, he would, +with consummate skill and boldness, make some prodigious hits which +would restore the battle, and come in a victor at the end, to the +astonishment of everybody--of everybody, that is, who was a stranger to +his play. Those who were accustomed to see it were cautious how they +staked their money against a man of such sudden resources and brilliant +and overpowering skill. + +At games of cards he was equally skilful; for though he would +constantly lose money at the commencement of an evening, playing so +carelessly and making such blunders, that newcomers were often inclined +to think meanly of his talent; yet when roused to action and awakened +to caution by repeated small losses, it was remarked that Crawley's +play became quite different, and that he was pretty sure of beating his +enemy thoroughly before the night was over. Indeed, very few men could +say that they ever had the better of him. His successes were so +repeated that no wonder the envious and the vanquished spoke sometimes +with bitterness regarding them. And as the French say of the Duke of +Wellington, who never suffered a defeat, that only an astonishing +series of lucky accidents enabled him to be an invariable winner; yet +even they allow that he cheated at Waterloo, and was enabled to win the +last great trick: so it was hinted at headquarters in England that +some foul play must have taken place in order to account for the +continuous successes of Colonel Crawley. + +Though Frascati's and the Salon were open at that time in Paris, the +mania for play was so widely spread that the public gambling-rooms did +not suffice for the general ardour, and gambling went on in private +houses as much as if there had been no public means for gratifying the +passion. At Crawley's charming little reunions of an evening this +fatal amusement commonly was practised--much to good-natured little +Mrs. Crawley's annoyance. She spoke about her husband's passion for +dice with the deepest grief; she bewailed it to everybody who came to +her house. She besought the young fellows never, never to touch a box; +and when young Green, of the Rifles, lost a very considerable sum of +money, Rebecca passed a whole night in tears, as the servant told the +unfortunate young gentleman, and actually went on her knees to her +husband to beseech him to remit the debt, and burn the acknowledgement. +How could he? He had lost just as much himself to Blackstone of the +Hussars, and Count Punter of the Hanoverian Cavalry. Green might have +any decent time; but pay?--of course he must pay; to talk of burning +IOU's was child's play. + +Other officers, chiefly young--for the young fellows gathered round +Mrs. Crawley--came from her parties with long faces, having dropped +more or less money at her fatal card-tables. Her house began to have +an unfortunate reputation. The old hands warned the less experienced +of their danger. Colonel O'Dowd, of the --th regiment, one of those +occupying in Paris, warned Lieutenant Spooney of that corps. A loud +and violent fracas took place between the infantry Colonel and his +lady, who were dining at the Cafe de Paris, and Colonel and Mrs. +Crawley; who were also taking their meal there. The ladies engaged on +both sides. Mrs. O'Dowd snapped her fingers in Mrs. Crawley's face and +called her husband "no betther than a black-leg." Colonel Crawley +challenged Colonel O'Dowd, C.B. The Commander-in-Chief hearing of the +dispute sent for Colonel Crawley, who was getting ready the same +pistols "which he shot Captain Marker," and had such a conversation +with him that no duel took place. If Rebecca had not gone on her knees +to General Tufto, Crawley would have been sent back to England; and he +did not play, except with civilians, for some weeks after. + +But, in spite of Rawdon's undoubted skill and constant successes, it +became evident to Rebecca, considering these things, that their +position was but a precarious one, and that, even although they paid +scarcely anybody, their little capital would end one day by dwindling +into zero. "Gambling," she would say, "dear, is good to help your +income, but not as an income itself. Some day people may be tired of +play, and then where are we?" Rawdon acquiesced in the justice of her +opinion; and in truth he had remarked that after a few nights of his +little suppers, &c., gentlemen were tired of play with him, and, in +spite of Rebecca's charms, did not present themselves very eagerly. + +Easy and pleasant as their life at Paris was, it was after all only an +idle dalliance and amiable trifling; and Rebecca saw that she must push +Rawdon's fortune in their own country. She must get him a place or +appointment at home or in the colonies, and she determined to make a +move upon England as soon as the way could be cleared for her. As a +first step she had made Crawley sell out of the Guards and go on +half-pay. His function as aide-de-camp to General Tufto had ceased +previously. Rebecca laughed in all companies at that officer, at his +toupee (which he mounted on coming to Paris), at his waistband, at his +false teeth, at his pretensions to be a lady-killer above all, and his +absurd vanity in fancying every woman whom he came near was in love +with him. It was to Mrs. Brent, the beetle-browed wife of Mr. +Commissary Brent, to whom the general transferred his attentions +now--his bouquets, his dinners at the restaurateurs', his opera-boxes, +and his knick-knacks. Poor Mrs. Tufto was no more happy than before, +and had still to pass long evenings alone with her daughters, knowing +that her General was gone off scented and curled to stand behind Mrs. +Brent's chair at the play. Becky had a dozen admirers in his place, to +be sure, and could cut her rival to pieces with her wit. But, as we +have said, she was growing tired of this idle social life: +opera-boxes and restaurateur dinners palled upon her: nosegays could +not be laid by as a provision for future years: and she could not live +upon knick-knacks, laced handkerchiefs, and kid gloves. She felt the +frivolity of pleasure and longed for more substantial benefits. + +At this juncture news arrived which was spread among the many creditors +of the Colonel at Paris, and which caused them great satisfaction. +Miss Crawley, the rich aunt from whom he expected his immense +inheritance, was dying; the Colonel must haste to her bedside. Mrs. +Crawley and her child would remain behind until he came to reclaim +them. He departed for Calais, and having reached that place in safety, +it might have been supposed that he went to Dover; but instead he took +the diligence to Dunkirk, and thence travelled to Brussels, for which +place he had a former predilection. The fact is, he owed more money at +London than at Paris; and he preferred the quiet little Belgian city to +either of the more noisy capitals. + +Her aunt was dead. Mrs. Crawley ordered the most intense mourning for +herself and little Rawdon. The Colonel was busy arranging the affairs +of the inheritance. They could take the premier now, instead of the +little entresol of the hotel which they occupied. Mrs. Crawley and the +landlord had a consultation about the new hangings, an amicable wrangle +about the carpets, and a final adjustment of everything except the +bill. She went off in one of his carriages; her French bonne with her; +the child by her side; the admirable landlord and landlady smiling +farewell to her from the gate. General Tufto was furious when he heard +she was gone, and Mrs. Brent furious with him for being furious; +Lieutenant Spooney was cut to the heart; and the landlord got ready his +best apartments previous to the return of the fascinating little woman +and her husband. He _serréd_ the trunks which she left in his charge +with the greatest care. They had been especially recommended to him by +Madame Crawley. They were not, however, found to be particularly +valuable when opened some time after. + +But before she went to join her husband in the Belgic capital, Mrs. +Crawley made an expedition into England, leaving behind her her little +son upon the continent, under the care of her French maid. + +The parting between Rebecca and the little Rawdon did not cause either +party much pain. She had not, to say truth, seen much of the young +gentleman since his birth. After the amiable fashion of French mothers, +she had placed him out at nurse in a village in the neighbourhood of +Paris, where little Rawdon passed the first months of his life, not +unhappily, with a numerous family of foster-brothers in wooden shoes. +His father would ride over many a time to see him here, and the elder +Rawdon's paternal heart glowed to see him rosy and dirty, shouting +lustily, and happy in the making of mud-pies under the superintendence +of the gardener's wife, his nurse. + +Rebecca did not care much to go and see the son and heir. Once he +spoiled a new dove-coloured pelisse of hers. He preferred his nurse's +caresses to his mamma's, and when finally he quitted that jolly nurse +and almost parent, he cried loudly for hours. He was only consoled by +his mother's promise that he should return to his nurse the next day; +indeed the nurse herself, who probably would have been pained at the +parting too, was told that the child would immediately be restored to +her, and for some time awaited quite anxiously his return. + +In fact, our friends may be said to have been among the first of that +brood of hardy English adventurers who have subsequently invaded the +Continent and swindled in all the capitals of Europe. The respect in +those happy days of 1817-18 was very great for the wealth and honour of +Britons. They had not then learned, as I am told, to haggle for +bargains with the pertinacity which now distinguishes them. The great +cities of Europe had not been as yet open to the enterprise of our +rascals. And whereas there is now hardly a town of France or Italy in +which you shall not see some noble countryman of our own, with that +happy swagger and insolence of demeanour which we carry everywhere, +swindling inn-landlords, passing fictitious cheques upon credulous +bankers, robbing coach-makers of their carriages, goldsmiths of their +trinkets, easy travellers of their money at cards, even public +libraries of their books--thirty years ago you needed but to be a Milor +Anglais, travelling in a private carriage, and credit was at your hand +wherever you chose to seek it, and gentlemen, instead of cheating, were +cheated. It was not for some weeks after the Crawleys' departure that +the landlord of the hotel which they occupied during their residence at +Paris found out the losses which he had sustained: not until Madame +Marabou, the milliner, made repeated visits with her little bill for +articles supplied to Madame Crawley; not until Monsieur Didelot from +Boule d'Or in the Palais Royal had asked half a dozen times whether +cette charmante Miladi who had bought watches and bracelets of him was +de retour. It is a fact that even the poor gardener's wife, who had +nursed madame's child, was never paid after the first six months for +that supply of the milk of human kindness with which she had furnished +the lusty and healthy little Rawdon. No, not even the nurse was +paid--the Crawleys were in too great a hurry to remember their trifling +debt to her. As for the landlord of the hotel, his curses against the +English nation were violent for the rest of his natural life. He asked +all travellers whether they knew a certain Colonel Lor Crawley--avec sa +femme une petite dame, tres spirituelle. "Ah, Monsieur!" he would +add--"ils m'ont affreusement vole." It was melancholy to hear his +accents as he spoke of that catastrophe. + +Rebecca's object in her journey to London was to effect a kind of +compromise with her husband's numerous creditors, and by offering them +a dividend of ninepence or a shilling in the pound, to secure a return +for him into his own country. It does not become us to trace the steps +which she took in the conduct of this most difficult negotiation; but, +having shown them to their satisfaction that the sum which she was +empowered to offer was all her husband's available capital, and having +convinced them that Colonel Crawley would prefer a perpetual retirement +on the Continent to a residence in this country with his debts +unsettled; having proved to them that there was no possibility of money +accruing to him from other quarters, and no earthly chance of their +getting a larger dividend than that which she was empowered to offer, +she brought the Colonel's creditors unanimously to accept her +proposals, and purchased with fifteen hundred pounds of ready money +more than ten times that amount of debts. + +Mrs. Crawley employed no lawyer in the transaction. The matter was so +simple, to have or to leave, as she justly observed, that she made the +lawyers of the creditors themselves do the business. And Mr. Lewis +representing Mr. Davids, of Red Lion Square, and Mr. Moss acting for +Mr. Manasseh of Cursitor Street (chief creditors of the Colonel's), +complimented his lady upon the brilliant way in which she did business, +and declared that there was no professional man who could beat her. + +Rebecca received their congratulations with perfect modesty; ordered a +bottle of sherry and a bread cake to the little dingy lodgings where +she dwelt, while conducting the business, to treat the enemy's lawyers: +shook hands with them at parting, in excellent good humour, and +returned straightway to the Continent, to rejoin her husband and son +and acquaint the former with the glad news of his entire liberation. +As for the latter, he had been considerably neglected during his +mother's absence by Mademoiselle Genevieve, her French maid; for that +young woman, contracting an attachment for a soldier in the garrison of +Calais, forgot her charge in the society of this militaire, and little +Rawdon very narrowly escaped drowning on Calais sands at this period, +where the absent Genevieve had left and lost him. + +And so, Colonel and Mrs. Crawley came to London: and it is at their +house in Curzon Street, May Fair, that they really showed the skill +which must be possessed by those who would live on the resources above +named. + + + +CHAPTER XXXVII + +The Subject Continued + +In the first place, and as a matter of the greatest necessity, we are +bound to describe how a house may be got for nothing a year. These +mansions are to be had either unfurnished, where, if you have credit +with Messrs. Gillows or Bantings, you can get them splendidly montees +and decorated entirely according to your own fancy; or they are to be +let furnished, a less troublesome and complicated arrangement to most +parties. It was so that Crawley and his wife preferred to hire their +house. + +Before Mr. Bowls came to preside over Miss Crawley's house and cellar +in Park Lane, that lady had had for a butler a Mr. Raggles, who was +born on the family estate of Queen's Crawley, and indeed was a younger +son of a gardener there. By good conduct, a handsome person and +calves, and a grave demeanour, Raggles rose from the knife-board to the +footboard of the carriage; from the footboard to the butler's pantry. +When he had been a certain number of years at the head of Miss +Crawley's establishment, where he had had good wages, fat perquisites, +and plenty of opportunities of saving, he announced that he was about +to contract a matrimonial alliance with a late cook of Miss Crawley's, +who had subsisted in an honourable manner by the exercise of a mangle, +and the keeping of a small greengrocer's shop in the neighbourhood. +The truth is, that the ceremony had been clandestinely performed some +years back; although the news of Mr. Raggles' marriage was first +brought to Miss Crawley by a little boy and girl of seven and eight +years of age, whose continual presence in the kitchen had attracted the +attention of Miss Briggs. + +Mr. Raggles then retired and personally undertook the superintendence +of the small shop and the greens. He added milk and cream, eggs and +country-fed pork to his stores, contenting himself whilst other retired +butlers were vending spirits in public houses, by dealing in the +simplest country produce. And having a good connection amongst the +butlers in the neighbourhood, and a snug back parlour where he and Mrs. +Raggles received them, his milk, cream, and eggs got to be adopted by +many of the fraternity, and his profits increased every year. Year +after year he quietly and modestly amassed money, and when at length +that snug and complete bachelor's residence at No. 201, Curzon Street, +May Fair, lately the residence of the Honourable Frederick Deuceace, +gone abroad, with its rich and appropriate furniture by the first +makers, was brought to the hammer, who should go in and purchase the +lease and furniture of the house but Charles Raggles? A part of the +money he borrowed, it is true, and at rather a high interest, from a +brother butler, but the chief part he paid down, and it was with no +small pride that Mrs. Raggles found herself sleeping in a bed of carved +mahogany, with silk curtains, with a prodigious cheval glass opposite +to her, and a wardrobe which would contain her, and Raggles, and all +the family. + +Of course, they did not intend to occupy permanently an apartment so +splendid. It was in order to let the house again that Raggles +purchased it. As soon as a tenant was found, he subsided into the +greengrocer's shop once more; but a happy thing it was for him to walk +out of that tenement and into Curzon Street, and there survey his +house--his own house--with geraniums in the window and a carved bronze +knocker. The footman occasionally lounging at the area railing, +treated him with respect; the cook took her green stuff at his house +and called him Mr. Landlord, and there was not one thing the tenants +did, or one dish which they had for dinner, that Raggles might not know +of, if he liked. + +He was a good man; good and happy. The house brought him in so +handsome a yearly income that he was determined to send his children to +good schools, and accordingly, regardless of expense, Charles was sent +to boarding at Dr. Swishtail's, Sugar-cane Lodge, and little Matilda to +Miss Peckover's, Laurentinum House, Clapham. + +Raggles loved and adored the Crawley family as the author of all his +prosperity in life. He had a silhouette of his mistress in his back +shop, and a drawing of the Porter's Lodge at Queen's Crawley, done by +that spinster herself in India ink--and the only addition he made to +the decorations of the Curzon Street House was a print of Queen's +Crawley in Hampshire, the seat of Sir Walpole Crawley, Baronet, who was +represented in a gilded car drawn by six white horses, and passing by a +lake covered with swans, and barges containing ladies in hoops, and +musicians with flags and periwigs. Indeed Raggles thought there was no +such palace in all the world, and no such august family. + +As luck would have it, Raggles' house in Curzon Street was to let when +Rawdon and his wife returned to London. The Colonel knew it and its +owner quite well; the latter's connection with the Crawley family had +been kept up constantly, for Raggles helped Mr. Bowls whenever Miss +Crawley received friends. And the old man not only let his house to +the Colonel but officiated as his butler whenever he had company; Mrs. +Raggles operating in the kitchen below and sending up dinners of which +old Miss Crawley herself might have approved. This was the way, then, +Crawley got his house for nothing; for though Raggles had to pay taxes +and rates, and the interest of the mortgage to the brother butler; and +the insurance of his life; and the charges for his children at school; +and the value of the meat and drink which his own family--and for a +time that of Colonel Crawley too--consumed; and though the poor wretch +was utterly ruined by the transaction, his children being flung on the +streets, and himself driven into the Fleet Prison: yet somebody must +pay even for gentlemen who live for nothing a year--and so it was this +unlucky Raggles was made the representative of Colonel Crawley's +defective capital. + +I wonder how many families are driven to roguery and to ruin by great +practitioners in Crawley's way?--how many great noblemen rob their petty +tradesmen, condescend to swindle their poor retainers out of wretched +little sums and cheat for a few shillings? When we read that a noble +nobleman has left for the Continent, or that another noble nobleman has +an execution in his house--and that one or other owes six or seven +millions, the defeat seems glorious even, and we respect the victim in +the vastness of his ruin. But who pities a poor barber who can't get +his money for powdering the footmen's heads; or a poor carpenter who +has ruined himself by fixing up ornaments and pavilions for my lady's +dejeuner; or the poor devil of a tailor whom the steward patronizes, +and who has pledged all he is worth, and more, to get the liveries +ready, which my lord has done him the honour to bespeak? When the great +house tumbles down, these miserable wretches fall under it unnoticed: +as they say in the old legends, before a man goes to the devil himself, +he sends plenty of other souls thither. + +Rawdon and his wife generously gave their patronage to all such of Miss +Crawley's tradesmen and purveyors as chose to serve them. Some were +willing enough, especially the poor ones. It was wonderful to see the +pertinacity with which the washerwoman from Tooting brought the cart +every Saturday, and her bills week after week. Mr. Raggles himself had +to supply the greengroceries. The bill for servants' porter at the +Fortune of War public house is a curiosity in the chronicles of beer. +Every servant also was owed the greater part of his wages, and thus +kept up perforce an interest in the house. Nobody in fact was paid. +Not the blacksmith who opened the lock; nor the glazier who mended the +pane; nor the jobber who let the carriage; nor the groom who drove it; +nor the butcher who provided the leg of mutton; nor the coals which +roasted it; nor the cook who basted it; nor the servants who ate it: +and this I am given to understand is not unfrequently the way in which +people live elegantly on nothing a year. + +In a little town such things cannot be done without remark. We know +there the quantity of milk our neighbour takes and espy the joint or +the fowls which are going in for his dinner. So, probably, 200 and 202 +in Curzon Street might know what was going on in the house between +them, the servants communicating through the area-railings; but Crawley +and his wife and his friends did not know 200 and 202. When you came to +201 there was a hearty welcome, a kind smile, a good dinner, and a +jolly shake of the hand from the host and hostess there, just for all +the world as if they had been undisputed masters of three or four +thousand a year--and so they were, not in money, but in produce and +labour--if they did not pay for the mutton, they had it: if they did +not give bullion in exchange for their wine, how should we know? Never +was better claret at any man's table than at honest Rawdon's; dinners +more gay and neatly served. His drawing-rooms were the prettiest, +little, modest salons conceivable: they were decorated with the +greatest taste, and a thousand knick-knacks from Paris, by Rebecca: +and when she sat at her piano trilling songs with a lightsome heart, +the stranger voted himself in a little paradise of domestic comfort and +agreed that, if the husband was rather stupid, the wife was charming, +and the dinners the pleasantest in the world. + +Rebecca's wit, cleverness, and flippancy made her speedily the vogue in +London among a certain class. You saw demure chariots at her door, out +of which stepped very great people. You beheld her carriage in the +park, surrounded by dandies of note. The little box in the third tier +of the opera was crowded with heads constantly changing; but it must be +confessed that the ladies held aloof from her, and that their doors +were shut to our little adventurer. + +With regard to the world of female fashion and its customs, the present +writer of course can only speak at second hand. A man can no more +penetrate or understand those mysteries than he can know what the +ladies talk about when they go upstairs after dinner. It is only by +inquiry and perseverance that one sometimes gets hints of those +secrets; and by a similar diligence every person who treads the Pall +Mall pavement and frequents the clubs of this metropolis knows, either +through his own experience or through some acquaintance with whom he +plays at billiards or shares the joint, something about the genteel +world of London, and how, as there are men (such as Rawdon Crawley, +whose position we mentioned before) who cut a good figure to the eyes +of the ignorant world and to the apprentices in the park, who behold +them consorting with the most notorious dandies there, so there are +ladies, who may be called men's women, being welcomed entirely by all +the gentlemen and cut or slighted by all their wives. Mrs. Firebrace +is of this sort; the lady with the beautiful fair ringlets whom you see +every day in Hyde Park, surrounded by the greatest and most famous +dandies of this empire. Mrs. Rockwood is another, whose parties are +announced laboriously in the fashionable newspapers and with whom you +see that all sorts of ambassadors and great noblemen dine; and many +more might be mentioned had they to do with the history at present in +hand. But while simple folks who are out of the world, or country +people with a taste for the genteel, behold these ladies in their +seeming glory in public places, or envy them from afar off, persons who +are better instructed could inform them that these envied ladies have +no more chance of establishing themselves in "society," than the +benighted squire's wife in Somersetshire who reads of their doings in +the Morning Post. Men living about London are aware of these awful +truths. You hear how pitilessly many ladies of seeming rank and wealth +are excluded from this "society." The frantic efforts which they make +to enter this circle, the meannesses to which they submit, the insults +which they undergo, are matters of wonder to those who take human or +womankind for a study; and the pursuit of fashion under difficulties +would be a fine theme for any very great person who had the wit, the +leisure, and the knowledge of the English language necessary for the +compiling of such a history. + +Now the few female acquaintances whom Mrs. Crawley had known abroad not +only declined to visit her when she came to this side of the Channel, +but cut her severely when they met in public places. It was curious to +see how the great ladies forgot her, and no doubt not altogether a +pleasant study to Rebecca. When Lady Bareacres met her in the +waiting-room at the opera, she gathered her daughters about her as if +they would be contaminated by a touch of Becky, and retreating a step +or two, placed herself in front of them, and stared at her little +enemy. To stare Becky out of countenance required a severer glance than +even the frigid old Bareacres could shoot out of her dismal eyes. When +Lady de la Mole, who had ridden a score of times by Becky's side at +Brussels, met Mrs. Crawley's open carriage in Hyde Park, her Ladyship +was quite blind, and could not in the least recognize her former +friend. Even Mrs. Blenkinsop, the banker's wife, cut her at church. +Becky went regularly to church now; it was edifying to see her enter +there with Rawdon by her side, carrying a couple of large gilt +prayer-books, and afterwards going through the ceremony with the +gravest resignation. + +Rawdon at first felt very acutely the slights which were passed upon +his wife, and was inclined to be gloomy and savage. He talked of +calling out the husbands or brothers of every one of the insolent women +who did not pay a proper respect to his wife; and it was only by the +strongest commands and entreaties on her part that he was brought into +keeping a decent behaviour. "You can't shoot me into society," she +said good-naturedly. "Remember, my dear, that I was but a governess, +and you, you poor silly old man, have the worst reputation for debt, +and dice, and all sorts of wickedness. We shall get quite as many +friends as we want by and by, and in the meanwhile you must be a good +boy and obey your schoolmistress in everything she tells you to do. +When we heard that your aunt had left almost everything to Pitt and his +wife, do you remember what a rage you were in? You would have told all +Paris, if I had not made you keep your temper, and where would you have +been now?--in prison at Ste. Pelagie for debt, and not established in +London in a handsome house, with every comfort about you--you were in +such a fury you were ready to murder your brother, you wicked Cain you, +and what good would have come of remaining angry? All the rage in the +world won't get us your aunt's money; and it is much better that we +should be friends with your brother's family than enemies, as those +foolish Butes are. When your father dies, Queen's Crawley will be a +pleasant house for you and me to pass the winter in. If we are ruined, +you can carve and take charge of the stable, and I can be a governess +to Lady Jane's children. Ruined! fiddlede-dee! I will get you a good +place before that; or Pitt and his little boy will die, and we will be +Sir Rawdon and my lady. While there is life, there is hope, my dear, +and I intend to make a man of you yet. Who sold your horses for you? +Who paid your debts for you?" Rawdon was obliged to confess that he +owed all these benefits to his wife, and to trust himself to her +guidance for the future. + +Indeed, when Miss Crawley quitted the world, and that money for which +all her relatives had been fighting so eagerly was finally left to +Pitt, Bute Crawley, who found that only five thousand pounds had been +left to him instead of the twenty upon which he calculated, was in such +a fury at his disappointment that he vented it in savage abuse upon his +nephew; and the quarrel always rankling between them ended in an utter +breach of intercourse. Rawdon Crawley's conduct, on the other hand, +who got but a hundred pounds, was such as to astonish his brother and +delight his sister-in-law, who was disposed to look kindly upon all the +members of her husband's family. He wrote to his brother a very frank, +manly, good-humoured letter from Paris. He was aware, he said, that by +his own marriage he had forfeited his aunt's favour; and though he did +not disguise his disappointment that she should have been so entirely +relentless towards him, he was glad that the money was still kept in +their branch of the family, and heartily congratulated his brother on +his good fortune. He sent his affectionate remembrances to his sister, +and hoped to have her good-will for Mrs. Rawdon; and the letter +concluded with a postscript to Pitt in the latter lady's own +handwriting. She, too, begged to join in her husband's +congratulations. She should ever remember Mr. Crawley's kindness to +her in early days when she was a friendless orphan, the instructress of +his little sisters, in whose welfare she still took the tenderest +interest. She wished him every happiness in his married life, and, +asking his permission to offer her remembrances to Lady Jane (of whose +goodness all the world informed her), she hoped that one day she might +be allowed to present her little boy to his uncle and aunt, and begged +to bespeak for him their good-will and protection. + +Pitt Crawley received this communication very graciously--more +graciously than Miss Crawley had received some of Rebecca's previous +compositions in Rawdon's handwriting; and as for Lady Jane, she was so +charmed with the letter that she expected her husband would instantly +divide his aunt's legacy into two equal portions and send off one-half +to his brother at Paris. + +To her Ladyship's surprise, however, Pitt declined to accommodate his +brother with a cheque for thirty thousand pounds. But he made Rawdon a +handsome offer of his hand whenever the latter should come to England +and choose to take it; and, thanking Mrs. Crawley for her good opinion +of himself and Lady Jane, he graciously pronounced his willingness to +take any opportunity to serve her little boy. + +Thus an almost reconciliation was brought about between the brothers. +When Rebecca came to town Pitt and his wife were not in London. Many a +time she drove by the old door in Park Lane to see whether they had +taken possession of Miss Crawley's house there. But the new family did +not make its appearance; it was only through Raggles that she heard of +their movements--how Miss Crawley's domestics had been dismissed with +decent gratuities, and how Mr. Pitt had only once made his appearance +in London, when he stopped for a few days at the house, did business +with his lawyers there, and sold off all Miss Crawley's French novels +to a bookseller out of Bond Street. Becky had reasons of her own which +caused her to long for the arrival of her new relation. "When Lady Jane +comes," thought she, "she shall be my sponsor in London society; and as +for the women! bah! the women will ask me when they find the men want +to see me." + +An article as necessary to a lady in this position as her brougham or +her bouquet is her companion. I have always admired the way in which +the tender creatures, who cannot exist without sympathy, hire an +exceedingly plain friend of their own sex from whom they are almost +inseparable. The sight of that inevitable woman in her faded gown +seated behind her dear friend in the opera-box, or occupying the back +seat of the barouche, is always a wholesome and moral one to me, as +jolly a reminder as that of the Death's-head which figured in the +repasts of Egyptian bon-vivants, a strange sardonic memorial of Vanity +Fair. What? even battered, brazen, beautiful, conscienceless, +heartless, Mrs. Firebrace, whose father died of her shame: even +lovely, daring Mrs. Mantrap, who will ride at any fence which any man +in England will take, and who drives her greys in the park, while her +mother keeps a huckster's stall in Bath still--even those who are so +bold, one might fancy they could face anything, dare not face the world +without a female friend. They must have somebody to cling to, the +affectionate creatures! And you will hardly see them in any public +place without a shabby companion in a dyed silk, sitting somewhere in +the shade close behind them. + +"Rawdon," said Becky, very late one night, as a party of gentlemen were +seated round her crackling drawing-room fire (for the men came to her +house to finish the night; and she had ice and coffee for them, the +best in London): "I must have a sheep-dog." + +"A what?" said Rawdon, looking up from an ecarte table. + +"A sheep-dog!" said young Lord Southdown. "My dear Mrs. Crawley, what +a fancy! Why not have a Danish dog? I know of one as big as a +camel-leopard, by Jove. It would almost pull your brougham. Or a +Persian greyhound, eh? (I propose, if you please); or a little pug that +would go into one of Lord Steyne's snuff-boxes? There's a man at +Bayswater got one with such a nose that you might--I mark the king and +play--that you might hang your hat on it." + +"I mark the trick," Rawdon gravely said. He attended to his game +commonly and didn't much meddle with the conversation, except when it +was about horses and betting. + +"What CAN you want with a shepherd's dog?" the lively little Southdown +continued. + +"I mean a MORAL shepherd's dog," said Becky, laughing and looking up at +Lord Steyne. + +"What the devil's that?" said his Lordship. + +"A dog to keep the wolves off me," Rebecca continued. "A companion." + +"Dear little innocent lamb, you want one," said the marquis; and his +jaw thrust out, and he began to grin hideously, his little eyes leering +towards Rebecca. + +The great Lord of Steyne was standing by the fire sipping coffee. The +fire crackled and blazed pleasantly. There was a score of candles +sparkling round the mantel piece, in all sorts of quaint sconces, of +gilt and bronze and porcelain. They lighted up Rebecca's figure to +admiration, as she sat on a sofa covered with a pattern of gaudy +flowers. She was in a pink dress that looked as fresh as a rose; her +dazzling white arms and shoulders were half-covered with a thin hazy +scarf through which they sparkled; her hair hung in curls round her +neck; one of her little feet peeped out from the fresh crisp folds of +the silk: the prettiest little foot in the prettiest little sandal in +the finest silk stocking in the world. + +The candles lighted up Lord Steyne's shining bald head, which was +fringed with red hair. He had thick bushy eyebrows, with little +twinkling bloodshot eyes, surrounded by a thousand wrinkles. His jaw +was underhung, and when he laughed, two white buck-teeth protruded +themselves and glistened savagely in the midst of the grin. He had been +dining with royal personages, and wore his garter and ribbon. A short +man was his Lordship, broad-chested and bow-legged, but proud of the +fineness of his foot and ankle, and always caressing his garter-knee. + +"And so the shepherd is not enough," said he, "to defend his lambkin?" + +"The shepherd is too fond of playing at cards and going to his clubs," +answered Becky, laughing. + +"'Gad, what a debauched Corydon!" said my lord--"what a mouth for a +pipe!" + +"I take your three to two," here said Rawdon, at the card-table. + +"Hark at Meliboeus," snarled the noble marquis; "he's pastorally +occupied too: he's shearing a Southdown. What an innocent mutton, hey? +Damme, what a snowy fleece!" + +Rebecca's eyes shot out gleams of scornful humour. "My lord," she said, +"you are a knight of the Order." He had the collar round his neck, +indeed--a gift of the restored princes of Spain. + +Lord Steyne in early life had been notorious for his daring and his +success at play. He had sat up two days and two nights with Mr. Fox at +hazard. He had won money of the most august personages of the realm: +he had won his marquisate, it was said, at the gaming-table; but he did +not like an allusion to those bygone fredaines. Rebecca saw the scowl +gathering over his heavy brow. + +She rose up from her sofa and went and took his coffee cup out of his +hand with a little curtsey. "Yes," she said, "I must get a watchdog. +But he won't bark at YOU." And, going into the other drawing-room, she +sat down to the piano and began to sing little French songs in such a +charming, thrilling voice that the mollified nobleman speedily followed +her into that chamber, and might be seen nodding his head and bowing +time over her. + +Rawdon and his friend meanwhile played ecarte until they had enough. +The Colonel won; but, say that he won ever so much and often, nights +like these, which occurred many times in the week--his wife having all +the talk and all the admiration, and he sitting silent without the +circle, not comprehending a word of the jokes, the allusions, the +mystical language within--must have been rather wearisome to the +ex-dragoon. + +"How is Mrs. Crawley's husband?" Lord Steyne used to say to him by way +of a good day when they met; and indeed that was now his avocation in +life. He was Colonel Crawley no more. He was Mrs. Crawley's husband. + +About the little Rawdon, if nothing has been said all this while, it is +because he is hidden upstairs in a garret somewhere, or has crawled +below into the kitchen for companionship. His mother scarcely ever +took notice of him. He passed the days with his French bonne as long +as that domestic remained in Mr. Crawley's family, and when the +Frenchwoman went away, the little fellow, howling in the loneliness of +the night, had compassion taken on him by a housemaid, who took him out +of his solitary nursery into her bed in the garret hard by and +comforted him. + +Rebecca, my Lord Steyne, and one or two more were in the drawing-room +taking tea after the opera, when this shouting was heard overhead. +"It's my cherub crying for his nurse," she said. She did not offer to +move to go and see the child. "Don't agitate your feelings by going to +look for him," said Lord Steyne sardonically. "Bah!" replied the other, +with a sort of blush, "he'll cry himself to sleep"; and they fell to +talking about the opera. + +Rawdon had stolen off though, to look after his son and heir; and came +back to the company when he found that honest Dolly was consoling the +child. The Colonel's dressing-room was in those upper regions. He +used to see the boy there in private. They had interviews together +every morning when he shaved; Rawdon minor sitting on a box by his +father's side and watching the operation with never-ceasing pleasure. +He and the sire were great friends. The father would bring him +sweetmeats from the dessert and hide them in a certain old epaulet box, +where the child went to seek them, and laughed with joy on discovering +the treasure; laughed, but not too loud: for mamma was below asleep +and must not be disturbed. She did not go to rest till very late and +seldom rose till after noon. + +Rawdon bought the boy plenty of picture-books and crammed his nursery +with toys. Its walls were covered with pictures pasted up by the +father's own hand and purchased by him for ready money. When he was +off duty with Mrs. Rawdon in the park, he would sit up here, passing +hours with the boy; who rode on his chest, who pulled his great +mustachios as if they were driving-reins, and spent days with him in +indefatigable gambols. The room was a low room, and once, when the +child was not five years old, his father, who was tossing him wildly up +in his arms, hit the poor little chap's skull so violently against the +ceiling that he almost dropped the child, so terrified was he at the +disaster. + +Rawdon minor had made up his face for a tremendous howl--the severity +of the blow indeed authorized that indulgence; but just as he was going +to begin, the father interposed. + +"For God's sake, Rawdy, don't wake Mamma," he cried. And the child, +looking in a very hard and piteous way at his father, bit his lips, +clenched his hands, and didn't cry a bit. Rawdon told that story at +the clubs, at the mess, to everybody in town. "By Gad, sir," he +explained to the public in general, "what a good plucked one that boy +of mine is--what a trump he is! I half-sent his head through the +ceiling, by Gad, and he wouldn't cry for fear of disturbing his mother." + +Sometimes--once or twice in a week--that lady visited the upper regions +in which the child lived. She came like a vivified figure out of the +Magasin des Modes--blandly smiling in the most beautiful new clothes +and little gloves and boots. Wonderful scarfs, laces, and jewels +glittered about her. She had always a new bonnet on, and flowers +bloomed perpetually in it, or else magnificent curling ostrich +feathers, soft and snowy as camellias. She nodded twice or thrice +patronizingly to the little boy, who looked up from his dinner or from +the pictures of soldiers he was painting. When she left the room, an +odour of rose, or some other magical fragrance, lingered about the +nursery. She was an unearthly being in his eyes, superior to his +father--to all the world: to be worshipped and admired at a distance. +To drive with that lady in the carriage was an awful rite: he sat up +in the back seat and did not dare to speak: he gazed with all his eyes +at the beautifully dressed Princess opposite to him. Gentlemen on +splendid prancing horses came up and smiled and talked with her. How +her eyes beamed upon all of them! Her hand used to quiver and wave +gracefully as they passed. When he went out with her he had his new +red dress on. His old brown holland was good enough when he stayed at +home. Sometimes, when she was away, and Dolly his maid was making his +bed, he came into his mother's room. It was as the abode of a fairy to +him--a mystic chamber of splendour and delights. There in the wardrobe +hung those wonderful robes--pink and blue and many-tinted. There was +the jewel-case, silver-clasped, and the wondrous bronze hand on the +dressing-table, glistening all over with a hundred rings. There was +the cheval-glass, that miracle of art, in which he could just see his +own wondering head and the reflection of Dolly (queerly distorted, and +as if up in the ceiling), plumping and patting the pillows of the bed. +Oh, thou poor lonely little benighted boy! Mother is the name for God +in the lips and hearts of little children; and here was one who was +worshipping a stone! + +Now Rawdon Crawley, rascal as the Colonel was, had certain manly +tendencies of affection in his heart and could love a child and a woman +still. For Rawdon minor he had a great secret tenderness then, which +did not escape Rebecca, though she did not talk about it to her +husband. It did not annoy her: she was too good-natured. It only +increased her scorn for him. He felt somehow ashamed of this paternal +softness and hid it from his wife--only indulging in it when alone with +the boy. + +He used to take him out of mornings when they would go to the stables +together and to the park. Little Lord Southdown, the best-natured of +men, who would make you a present of the hat from his head, and whose +main occupation in life was to buy knick-knacks that he might give them +away afterwards, bought the little chap a pony not much bigger than a +large rat, the donor said, and on this little black Shetland pygmy +young Rawdon's great father was pleased to mount the boy, and to walk +by his side in the park. It pleased him to see his old quarters, and +his old fellow-guardsmen at Knightsbridge: he had begun to think of his +bachelorhood with something like regret. The old troopers were glad to +recognize their ancient officer and dandle the little colonel. Colonel +Crawley found dining at mess and with his brother-officers very +pleasant. "Hang it, I ain't clever enough for her--I know it. She +won't miss me," he used to say: and he was right, his wife did not +miss him. + +Rebecca was fond of her husband. She was always perfectly good-humoured +and kind to him. She did not even show her scorn much for +him; perhaps she liked him the better for being a fool. He was her +upper servant and maitre d'hotel. He went on her errands; obeyed her +orders without question; drove in the carriage in the ring with her +without repining; took her to the opera-box, solaced himself at his +club during the performance, and came punctually back to fetch her when +due. He would have liked her to be a little fonder of the boy, but +even to that he reconciled himself. "Hang it, you know she's so +clever," he said, "and I'm not literary and that, you know." For, as we +have said before, it requires no great wisdom to be able to win at +cards and billiards, and Rawdon made no pretensions to any other sort +of skill. + +When the companion came, his domestic duties became very light. His +wife encouraged him to dine abroad: she would let him off duty at the +opera. "Don't stay and stupefy yourself at home to-night, my dear," +she would say. "Some men are coming who will only bore you. I would +not ask them, but you know it's for your good, and now I have a +sheep-dog, I need not be afraid to be alone." + +"A sheep-dog--a companion! Becky Sharp with a companion! Isn't it +good fun?" thought Mrs. Crawley to herself. The notion tickled hugely +her sense of humour. + +One Sunday morning, as Rawdon Crawley, his little son, and the pony +were taking their accustomed walk in the park, they passed by an old +acquaintance of the Colonel's, Corporal Clink, of the regiment, who was +in conversation with a friend, an old gentleman, who held a boy in his +arms about the age of little Rawdon. This other youngster had seized +hold of the Waterloo medal which the Corporal wore, and was examining +it with delight. + +"Good morning, your Honour," said Clink, in reply to the "How do, +Clink?" of the Colonel. "This ere young gentleman is about the little +Colonel's age, sir," continued the corporal. + +"His father was a Waterloo man, too," said the old gentleman, who +carried the boy. "Wasn't he, Georgy?" + +"Yes," said Georgy. He and the little chap on the pony were looking at +each other with all their might--solemnly scanning each other as +children do. + +"In a line regiment," Clink said with a patronizing air. + +"He was a Captain in the --th regiment," said the old gentleman rather +pompously. "Captain George Osborne, sir--perhaps you knew him. He +died the death of a hero, sir, fighting against the Corsican tyrant." +Colonel Crawley blushed quite red. "I knew him very well, sir," he +said, "and his wife, his dear little wife, sir--how is she?" + +"She is my daughter, sir," said the old gentleman, putting down the boy +and taking out a card with great solemnity, which he handed to the +Colonel. On it written-- + +"Mr. Sedley, Sole Agent for the Black Diamond and Anti-Cinder Coal +Association, Bunker's Wharf, Thames Street, and Anna-Maria Cottages, +Fulham Road West." + +Little Georgy went up and looked at the Shetland pony. + +"Should you like to have a ride?" said Rawdon minor from the saddle. + +"Yes," said Georgy. The Colonel, who had been looking at him with some +interest, took up the child and put him on the pony behind Rawdon minor. + +"Take hold of him, Georgy," he said--"take my little boy round the +waist--his name is Rawdon." And both the children began to laugh. + +"You won't see a prettier pair I think, THIS summer's day, sir," said +the good-natured Corporal; and the Colonel, the Corporal, and old Mr. +Sedley with his umbrella, walked by the side of the children. + + + +CHAPTER XXXVIII + +A Family in a Very Small Way + +We must suppose little George Osborne has ridden from Knightsbridge +towards Fulham, and will stop and make inquiries at that village +regarding some friends whom we have left there. How is Mrs. Amelia +after the storm of Waterloo? Is she living and thriving? What has come +of Major Dobbin, whose cab was always hankering about her premises? And +is there any news of the Collector of Boggley Wollah? The facts +concerning the latter are briefly these: + +Our worthy fat friend Joseph Sedley returned to India not long after +his escape from Brussels. Either his furlough was up, or he dreaded to +meet any witnesses of his Waterloo flight. However it might be, he +went back to his duties in Bengal very soon after Napoleon had taken up +his residence at St. Helena, where Jos saw the ex-Emperor. To hear Mr. +Sedley talk on board ship you would have supposed that it was not the +first time he and the Corsican had met, and that the civilian had +bearded the French General at Mount St. John. He had a thousand +anecdotes about the famous battles; he knew the position of every +regiment and the loss which each had incurred. He did not deny that he +had been concerned in those victories--that he had been with the army +and carried despatches for the Duke of Wellington. And he described +what the Duke did and said on every conceivable moment of the day of +Waterloo, with such an accurate knowledge of his Grace's sentiments and +proceedings that it was clear he must have been by the conqueror's side +throughout the day; though, as a non-combatant, his name was not +mentioned in the public documents relative to the battle. Perhaps he +actually worked himself up to believe that he had been engaged with the +army; certain it is that he made a prodigious sensation for some time +at Calcutta, and was called Waterloo Sedley during the whole of his +subsequent stay in Bengal. + +The bills which Jos had given for the purchase of those unlucky horses +were paid without question by him and his agents. He never was heard +to allude to the bargain, and nobody knows for a certainty what became +of the horses, or how he got rid of them, or of Isidor, his Belgian +servant, who sold a grey horse, very like the one which Jos rode, at +Valenciennes sometime during the autumn of 1815. + +Jos's London agents had orders to pay one hundred and twenty pounds +yearly to his parents at Fulham. It was the chief support of the old +couple; for Mr. Sedley's speculations in life subsequent to his +bankruptcy did not by any means retrieve the broken old gentleman's +fortune. He tried to be a wine-merchant, a coal-merchant, a commission +lottery agent, &c., &c. He sent round prospectuses to his friends +whenever he took a new trade, and ordered a new brass plate for the +door, and talked pompously about making his fortune still. But Fortune +never came back to the feeble and stricken old man. One by one his +friends dropped off, and were weary of buying dear coals and bad wine +from him; and there was only his wife in all the world who fancied, +when he tottered off to the City of a morning, that he was still doing +any business there. At evening he crawled slowly back; and he used to +go of nights to a little club at a tavern, where he disposed of the +finances of the nation. It was wonderful to hear him talk about +millions, and agios, and discounts, and what Rothschild was doing, and +Baring Brothers. He talked of such vast sums that the gentlemen of the +club (the apothecary, the undertaker, the great carpenter and builder, +the parish clerk, who was allowed to come stealthily, and Mr. Clapp, +our old acquaintance,) respected the old gentleman. "I was better off +once, sir," he did not fail to tell everybody who "used the room." "My +son, sir, is at this minute chief magistrate of Ramgunge in the +Presidency of Bengal, and touching his four thousand rupees per mensem. +My daughter might be a Colonel's lady if she liked. I might draw upon +my son, the first magistrate, sir, for two thousand pounds to-morrow, +and Alexander would cash my bill, down sir, down on the counter, sir. +But the Sedleys were always a proud family." You and I, my dear reader, +may drop into this condition one day: for have not many of our friends +attained it? Our luck may fail: our powers forsake us: our place on +the boards be taken by better and younger mimes--the chance of life +roll away and leave us shattered and stranded. Then men will walk +across the road when they meet you--or, worse still, hold you out a +couple of fingers and patronize you in a pitying way--then you will +know, as soon as your back is turned, that your friend begins with a +"Poor devil, what imprudences he has committed, what chances that chap +has thrown away!" Well, well--a carriage and three thousand a year is +not the summit of the reward nor the end of God's judgment of men. If +quacks prosper as often as they go to the wall--if zanies succeed and +knaves arrive at fortune, and, vice versa, sharing ill luck and +prosperity for all the world like the ablest and most honest amongst +us--I say, brother, the gifts and pleasures of Vanity Fair cannot be +held of any great account, and that it is probable . . . but we are +wandering out of the domain of the story. + +Had Mrs. Sedley been a woman of energy, she would have exerted it after +her husband's ruin and, occupying a large house, would have taken in +boarders. The broken Sedley would have acted well as the +boarding-house landlady's husband; the Munoz of private life; the +titular lord and master: the carver, house-steward, and humble husband +of the occupier of the dingy throne. I have seen men of good brains +and breeding, and of good hopes and vigour once, who feasted squires +and kept hunters in their youth, meekly cutting up legs of mutton for +rancorous old harridans and pretending to preside over their dreary +tables--but Mrs. Sedley, we say, had not spirit enough to bustle about +for "a few select inmates to join a cheerful musical family," such as +one reads of in the Times. She was content to lie on the shore where +fortune had stranded her--and you could see that the career of this old +couple was over. + +I don't think they were unhappy. Perhaps they were a little prouder in +their downfall than in their prosperity. Mrs. Sedley was always a great +person for her landlady, Mrs. Clapp, when she descended and passed many +hours with her in the basement or ornamented kitchen. The Irish maid +Betty Flanagan's bonnets and ribbons, her sauciness, her idleness, her +reckless prodigality of kitchen candles, her consumption of tea and +sugar, and so forth occupied and amused the old lady almost as much as +the doings of her former household, when she had Sambo and the +coachman, and a groom, and a footboy, and a housekeeper with a regiment +of female domestics--her former household, about which the good lady +talked a hundred times a day. And besides Betty Flanagan, Mrs. Sedley +had all the maids-of-all-work in the street to superintend. She knew +how each tenant of the cottages paid or owed his little rent. She +stepped aside when Mrs. Rougemont the actress passed with her dubious +family. She flung up her head when Mrs. Pestler, the apothecary's +lady, drove by in her husband's professional one-horse chaise. She had +colloquies with the greengrocer about the pennorth of turnips which Mr. +Sedley loved; she kept an eye upon the milkman and the baker's boy; and +made visitations to the butcher, who sold hundreds of oxen very likely +with less ado than was made about Mrs. Sedley's loin of mutton: and +she counted the potatoes under the joint on Sundays, on which days, +dressed in her best, she went to church twice and read Blair's Sermons +in the evening. + +On that day, for "business" prevented him on weekdays from taking such +a pleasure, it was old Sedley's delight to take out his little grandson +Georgy to the neighbouring parks or Kensington Gardens, to see the +soldiers or to feed the ducks. Georgy loved the redcoats, and his +grandpapa told him how his father had been a famous soldier, and +introduced him to many sergeants and others with Waterloo medals on +their breasts, to whom the old grandfather pompously presented the +child as the son of Captain Osborne of the --th, who died gloriously on +the glorious eighteenth. He has been known to treat some of these +non-commissioned gentlemen to a glass of porter, and, indeed, in their +first Sunday walks was disposed to spoil little Georgy, sadly gorging +the boy with apples and parliament, to the detriment of his +health--until Amelia declared that George should never go out with his +grandpapa unless the latter promised solemnly, and on his honour, not +to give the child any cakes, lollipops, or stall produce whatever. + +Between Mrs. Sedley and her daughter there was a sort of coolness about +this boy, and a secret jealousy--for one evening in George's very early +days, Amelia, who had been seated at work in their little parlour +scarcely remarking that the old lady had quitted the room, ran upstairs +instinctively to the nursery at the cries of the child, who had been +asleep until that moment--and there found Mrs. Sedley in the act of +surreptitiously administering Daffy's Elixir to the infant. Amelia, +the gentlest and sweetest of everyday mortals, when she found this +meddling with her maternal authority, thrilled and trembled all over +with anger. Her cheeks, ordinarily pale, now flushed up, until they +were as red as they used to be when she was a child of twelve years +old. She seized the baby out of her mother's arms and then grasped at +the bottle, leaving the old lady gaping at her, furious, and holding +the guilty tea-spoon. + +Amelia flung the bottle crashing into the fire-place. "I will NOT have +baby poisoned, Mamma," cried Emmy, rocking the infant about violently +with both her arms round him and turning with flashing eyes at her +mother. + +"Poisoned, Amelia!" said the old lady; "this language to me?" + +"He shall not have any medicine but that which Mr. Pestler sends for +him. He told me that Daffy's Elixir was poison." + +"Very good: you think I'm a murderess then," replied Mrs. Sedley. +"This is the language you use to your mother. I have met with +misfortunes: I have sunk low in life: I have kept my carriage, and +now walk on foot: but I did not know I was a murderess before, and +thank you for the NEWS." + +"Mamma," said the poor girl, who was always ready for tears--"you +shouldn't be hard upon me. I--I didn't mean--I mean, I did not wish to +say you would do any wrong to this dear child, only--" + +"Oh, no, my love,--only that I was a murderess; in which case I had +better go to the Old Bailey. Though I didn't poison YOU, when you were +a child, but gave you the best of education and the most expensive +masters money could procure. Yes; I've nursed five children and buried +three; and the one I loved the best of all, and tended through croup, +and teething, and measles, and hooping-cough, and brought up with +foreign masters, regardless of expense, and with accomplishments at +Minerva House--which I never had when I was a girl--when I was too glad +to honour my father and mother, that I might live long in the land, and +to be useful, and not to mope all day in my room and act the fine +lady--says I'm a murderess. Ah, Mrs. Osborne! may YOU never nourish a +viper in your bosom, that's MY prayer." + +"Mamma, Mamma!" cried the bewildered girl; and the child in her arms +set up a frantic chorus of shouts. "A murderess, indeed! Go down on +your knees and pray to God to cleanse your wicked ungrateful heart, +Amelia, and may He forgive you as I do." And Mrs. Sedley tossed out of +the room, hissing out the word poison once more, and so ending her +charitable benediction. + +Till the termination of her natural life, this breach between Mrs. +Sedley and her daughter was never thoroughly mended. The quarrel gave +the elder lady numberless advantages which she did not fail to turn to +account with female ingenuity and perseverance. For instance, she +scarcely spoke to Amelia for many weeks afterwards. She warned the +domestics not to touch the child, as Mrs. Osborne might be offended. +She asked her daughter to see and satisfy herself that there was no +poison prepared in the little daily messes that were concocted for +Georgy. When neighbours asked after the boy's health, she referred them +pointedly to Mrs. Osborne. SHE never ventured to ask whether the baby +was well or not. SHE would not touch the child although he was her +grandson, and own precious darling, for she was not USED to children, +and might kill it. And whenever Mr. Pestler came upon his healing +inquisition, she received the doctor with such a sarcastic and scornful +demeanour, as made the surgeon declare that not Lady Thistlewood +herself, whom he had the honour of attending professionally, could give +herself greater airs than old Mrs. Sedley, from whom he never took a +fee. And very likely Emmy was jealous too, upon her own part, as what +mother is not, of those who would manage her children for her, or +become candidates for the first place in their affections. It is +certain that when anybody nursed the child, she was uneasy, and that +she would no more allow Mrs. Clapp or the domestic to dress or tend him +than she would have let them wash her husband's miniature which hung up +over her little bed--the same little bed from which the poor girl had +gone to his; and to which she retired now for many long, silent, +tearful, but happy years. + +In this room was all Amelia's heart and treasure. Here it was that she +tended her boy and watched him through the many ills of childhood, with +a constant passion of love. The elder George returned in him somehow, +only improved, and as if come back from heaven. In a hundred little +tones, looks, and movements, the child was so like his father that the +widow's heart thrilled as she held him to it; and he would often ask +the cause of her tears. It was because of his likeness to his father, +she did not scruple to tell him. She talked constantly to him about +this dead father, and spoke of her love for George to the innocent and +wondering child; much more than she ever had done to George himself, or +to any confidante of her youth. To her parents she never talked about +this matter, shrinking from baring her heart to them. Little George +very likely could understand no better than they, but into his ears she +poured her sentimental secrets unreservedly, and into his only. The +very joy of this woman was a sort of grief, or so tender, at least, +that its expression was tears. Her sensibilities were so weak and +tremulous that perhaps they ought not to be talked about in a book. I +was told by Dr. Pestler (now a most flourishing lady's physician, with +a sumptuous dark green carriage, a prospect of speedy knighthood, and a +house in Manchester Square) that her grief at weaning the child was a +sight that would have unmanned a Herod. He was very soft-hearted many +years ago, and his wife was mortally jealous of Mrs. Amelia, then and +long afterwards. + +Perhaps the doctor's lady had good reason for her jealousy: most women +shared it, of those who formed the small circle of Amelia's +acquaintance, and were quite angry at the enthusiasm with which the +other sex regarded her. For almost all men who came near her loved +her; though no doubt they would be at a loss to tell you why. She was +not brilliant, nor witty, nor wise over much, nor extraordinarily +handsome. But wherever she went she touched and charmed every one of +the male sex, as invariably as she awakened the scorn and incredulity +of her own sisterhood. I think it was her weakness which was her +principal charm--a kind of sweet submission and softness, which seemed +to appeal to each man she met for his sympathy and protection. We have +seen how in the regiment, though she spoke but to few of George's +comrades there, all the swords of the young fellows at the mess-table +would have leapt from their scabbards to fight round her; and so it was +in the little narrow lodging-house and circle at Fulham, she interested +and pleased everybody. If she had been Mrs. Mango herself, of the +great house of Mango, Plantain, and Co., Crutched Friars, and the +magnificent proprietress of the Pineries, Fulham, who gave summer +dejeuners frequented by Dukes and Earls, and drove about the parish +with magnificent yellow liveries and bay horses, such as the royal +stables at Kensington themselves could not turn out--I say had she been +Mrs. Mango herself, or her son's wife, Lady Mary Mango (daughter of the +Earl of Castlemouldy, who condescended to marry the head of the firm), +the tradesmen of the neighbourhood could not pay her more honour than +they invariably showed to the gentle young widow, when she passed by +their doors, or made her humble purchases at their shops. + +Thus it was not only Mr. Pestler, the medical man, but Mr. Linton the +young assistant, who doctored the servant maids and small tradesmen, +and might be seen any day reading the Times in the surgery, who openly +declared himself the slave of Mrs. Osborne. He was a personable young +gentleman, more welcome at Mrs. Sedley's lodgings than his principal; +and if anything went wrong with Georgy, he would drop in twice or +thrice in the day to see the little chap, and without so much as the +thought of a fee. He would abstract lozenges, tamarinds, and other +produce from the surgery-drawers for little Georgy's benefit, and +compounded draughts and mixtures for him of miraculous sweetness, so +that it was quite a pleasure to the child to be ailing. He and +Pestler, his chief, sat up two whole nights by the boy in that +momentous and awful week when Georgy had the measles; and when you +would have thought, from the mother's terror, that there had never been +measles in the world before. Would they have done as much for other +people? Did they sit up for the folks at the Pineries, when Ralph +Plantagenet, and Gwendoline, and Guinever Mango had the same juvenile +complaint? Did they sit up for little Mary Clapp, the landlord's +daughter, who actually caught the disease of little Georgy? Truth +compels one to say, no. They slept quite undisturbed, at least as far +as she was concerned--pronounced hers to be a slight case, which would +almost cure itself, sent her in a draught or two, and threw in bark +when the child rallied, with perfect indifference, and just for form's +sake. + +Again, there was the little French chevalier opposite, who gave lessons +in his native tongue at various schools in the neighbourhood, and who +might be heard in his apartment of nights playing tremulous old +gavottes and minuets on a wheezy old fiddle. Whenever this powdered and +courteous old man, who never missed a Sunday at the convent chapel at +Hammersmith, and who was in all respects, thoughts, conduct, and +bearing utterly unlike the bearded savages of his nation, who curse +perfidious Albion, and scowl at you from over their cigars, in the +Quadrant arcades at the present day--whenever the old Chevalier de +Talonrouge spoke of Mistress Osborne, he would first finish his pinch +of snuff, flick away the remaining particles of dust with a graceful +wave of his hand, gather up his fingers again into a bunch, and, +bringing them up to his mouth, blow them open with a kiss, exclaiming, +Ah! la divine creature! He vowed and protested that when Amelia walked +in the Brompton Lanes flowers grew in profusion under her feet. He +called little Georgy Cupid, and asked him news of Venus, his mamma; and +told the astonished Betty Flanagan that she was one of the Graces, and +the favourite attendant of the Reine des Amours. + +Instances might be multiplied of this easily gained and unconscious +popularity. Did not Mr. Binny, the mild and genteel curate of the +district chapel, which the family attended, call assiduously upon the +widow, dandle the little boy on his knee, and offer to teach him Latin, +to the anger of the elderly virgin, his sister, who kept house for him? +"There is nothing in her, Beilby," the latter lady would say. "When +she comes to tea here she does not speak a word during the whole +evening. She is but a poor lackadaisical creature, and it is my belief +has no heart at all. It is only her pretty face which all you +gentlemen admire so. Miss Grits, who has five thousand pounds, and +expectations besides, has twice as much character, and is a thousand +times more agreeable to my taste; and if she were good-looking I know +that you would think her perfection." + +Very likely Miss Binny was right to a great extent. It IS the pretty +face which creates sympathy in the hearts of men, those wicked rogues. +A woman may possess the wisdom and chastity of Minerva, and we give no +heed to her, if she has a plain face. What folly will not a pair of +bright eyes make pardonable? What dulness may not red lips and sweet +accents render pleasant? And so, with their usual sense of justice, +ladies argue that because a woman is handsome, therefore she is a fool. +O ladies, ladies! there are some of you who are neither handsome nor +wise. + +These are but trivial incidents to recount in the life of our heroine. +Her tale does not deal in wonders, as the gentle reader has already no +doubt perceived; and if a journal had been kept of her proceedings +during the seven years after the birth of her son, there would be found +few incidents more remarkable in it than that of the measles, recorded +in the foregoing page. Yes, one day, and greatly to her wonder, the +Reverend Mr. Binny, just mentioned, asked her to change her name of +Osborne for his own; when, with deep blushes and tears in her eyes and +voice, she thanked him for his regard for her, expressed gratitude for +his attentions to her and to her poor little boy, but said that she +never, never could think of any but--but the husband whom she had lost. + +On the twenty-fifth of April, and the eighteenth of June, the days of +marriage and widowhood, she kept her room entirely, consecrating them +(and we do not know how many hours of solitary night-thought, her +little boy sleeping in his crib by her bedside) to the memory of that +departed friend. During the day she was more active. She had to teach +George to read and to write and a little to draw. She read books, in +order that she might tell him stories from them. As his eyes opened +and his mind expanded under the influence of the outward nature round +about him, she taught the child, to the best of her humble power, to +acknowledge the Maker of all, and every night and every morning he and +she--(in that awful and touching communion which I think must bring a +thrill to the heart of every man who witnesses or who remembers +it)--the mother and the little boy--prayed to Our Father together, the +mother pleading with all her gentle heart, the child lisping after her +as she spoke. And each time they prayed to God to bless dear Papa, as +if he were alive and in the room with them. To wash and dress this +young gentleman--to take him for a run of the mornings, before +breakfast, and the retreat of grandpapa for "business"--to make for him +the most wonderful and ingenious dresses, for which end the thrifty +widow cut up and altered every available little bit of finery which she +possessed out of her wardrobe during her marriage--for Mrs. Osborne +herself (greatly to her mother's vexation, who preferred fine clothes, +especially since her misfortunes) always wore a black gown and a straw +bonnet with a black ribbon--occupied her many hours of the day. Others +she had to spare, at the service of her mother and her old father. She +had taken the pains to learn, and used to play cribbage with this +gentleman on the nights when he did not go to his club. She sang for +him when he was so minded, and it was a good sign, for he invariably +fell into a comfortable sleep during the music. She wrote out his +numerous memorials, letters, prospectuses, and projects. It was in her +handwriting that most of the old gentleman's former acquaintances were +informed that he had become an agent for the Black Diamond and +Anti-Cinder Coal Company and could supply his friends and the public +with the best coals at --s. per chaldron. All he did was to sign the +circulars with his flourish and signature, and direct them in a shaky, +clerklike hand. One of these papers was sent to Major Dobbin,--Regt., +care of Messrs. Cox and Greenwood; but the Major being in Madras at +the time, had no particular call for coals. He knew, though, the hand +which had written the prospectus. Good God! what would he not have +given to hold it in his own! A second prospectus came out, informing +the Major that J. Sedley and Company, having established agencies at +Oporto, Bordeaux, and St. Mary's, were enabled to offer to their +friends and the public generally the finest and most celebrated growths +of ports, sherries, and claret wines at reasonable prices and under +extraordinary advantages. Acting upon this hint, Dobbin furiously +canvassed the governor, the commander-in-chief, the judges, the +regiments, and everybody whom he knew in the Presidency, and sent home +to Sedley and Co. orders for wine which perfectly astonished Mr. +Sedley and Mr. Clapp, who was the Co. in the business. But no more +orders came after that first burst of good fortune, on which poor old +Sedley was about to build a house in the City, a regiment of clerks, a +dock to himself, and correspondents all over the world. The old +gentleman's former taste in wine had gone: the curses of the mess-room +assailed Major Dobbin for the vile drinks he had been the means of +introducing there; and he bought back a great quantity of the wine and +sold it at public outcry, at an enormous loss to himself. As for Jos, +who was by this time promoted to a seat at the Revenue Board at +Calcutta, he was wild with rage when the post brought him out a bundle +of these Bacchanalian prospectuses, with a private note from his +father, telling Jos that his senior counted upon him in this +enterprise, and had consigned a quantity of select wines to him, as per +invoice, drawing bills upon him for the amount of the same. Jos, who +would no more have it supposed that his father, Jos Sedley's father, of +the Board of Revenue, was a wine merchant asking for orders, than that +he was Jack Ketch, refused the bills with scorn, wrote back +contumeliously to the old gentleman, bidding him to mind his own +affairs; and the protested paper coming back, Sedley and Co. had to +take it up, with the profits which they had made out of the Madras +venture, and with a little portion of Emmy's savings. + +Besides her pension of fifty pounds a year, there had been five hundred +pounds, as her husband's executor stated, left in the agent's hands at +the time of Osborne's demise, which sum, as George's guardian, Dobbin +proposed to put out at 8 per cent in an Indian house of agency. Mr. +Sedley, who thought the Major had some roguish intentions of his own +about the money, was strongly against this plan; and he went to the +agents to protest personally against the employment of the money in +question, when he learned, to his surprise, that there had been no such +sum in their hands, that all the late Captain's assets did not amount +to a hundred pounds, and that the five hundred pounds in question must +be a separate sum, of which Major Dobbin knew the particulars. More +than ever convinced that there was some roguery, old Sedley pursued the +Major. As his daughter's nearest friend, he demanded with a high hand +a statement of the late Captain's accounts. Dobbin's stammering, +blushing, and awkwardness added to the other's convictions that he had +a rogue to deal with, and in a majestic tone he told that officer a +piece of his mind, as he called it, simply stating his belief that the +Major was unlawfully detaining his late son-in-law's money. + +Dobbin at this lost all patience, and if his accuser had not been so +old and so broken, a quarrel might have ensued between them at the +Slaughters' Coffee-house, in a box of which place of entertainment the +gentlemen had their colloquy. "Come upstairs, sir," lisped out the +Major. "I insist on your coming up the stairs, and I will show which +is the injured party, poor George or I"; and, dragging the old +gentleman up to his bedroom, he produced from his desk Osborne's +accounts, and a bundle of IOU's which the latter had given, who, to do +him justice, was always ready to give an IOU. "He paid his bills in +England," Dobbin added, "but he had not a hundred pounds in the world +when he fell. I and one or two of his brother officers made up the +little sum, which was all that we could spare, and you dare tell us +that we are trying to cheat the widow and the orphan." Sedley was very +contrite and humbled, though the fact is that William Dobbin had told a +great falsehood to the old gentleman; having himself given every +shilling of the money, having buried his friend, and paid all the fees +and charges incident upon the calamity and removal of poor Amelia. + +About these expenses old Osborne had never given himself any trouble to +think, nor any other relative of Amelia, nor Amelia herself, indeed. +She trusted to Major Dobbin as an accountant, took his somewhat +confused calculations for granted, and never once suspected how much +she was in his debt. + +Twice or thrice in the year, according to her promise, she wrote him +letters to Madras, letters all about little Georgy. How he treasured +these papers! Whenever Amelia wrote he answered, and not until then. +But he sent over endless remembrances of himself to his godson and to +her. He ordered and sent a box of scarfs and a grand ivory set of +chess-men from China. The pawns were little green and white men, with +real swords and shields; the knights were on horseback, the castles +were on the backs of elephants. "Mrs. Mango's own set at the Pineries +was not so fine," Mr. Pestler remarked. These chess-men were the +delight of Georgy's life, who printed his first letter in +acknowledgement of this gift of his godpapa. He sent over preserves +and pickles, which latter the young gentleman tried surreptitiously in +the sideboard and half-killed himself with eating. He thought it was a +judgement upon him for stealing, they were so hot. Emmy wrote a +comical little account of this mishap to the Major: it pleased him to +think that her spirits were rallying and that she could be merry +sometimes now. He sent over a pair of shawls, a white one for her and +a black one with palm-leaves for her mother, and a pair of red scarfs, +as winter wrappers, for old Mr. Sedley and George. The shawls were +worth fifty guineas apiece at the very least, as Mrs. Sedley knew. She +wore hers in state at church at Brompton, and was congratulated by her +female friends upon the splendid acquisition. Emmy's, too, became +prettily her modest black gown. "What a pity it is she won't think of +him!" Mrs. Sedley remarked to Mrs. Clapp and to all her friends of +Brompton. "Jos never sent us such presents, I am sure, and grudges us +everything. It is evident that the Major is over head and ears in love +with her; and yet, whenever I so much as hint it, she turns red and +begins to cry and goes and sits upstairs with her miniature. I'm sick +of that miniature. I wish we had never seen those odious purse-proud +Osbornes." + +Amidst such humble scenes and associates George's early youth was +passed, and the boy grew up delicate, sensitive, imperious, +woman-bred--domineering the gentle mother whom he loved with passionate +affection. He ruled all the rest of the little world round about him. +As he grew, the elders were amazed at his haughty manner and his +constant likeness to his father. He asked questions about everything, +as inquiring youth will do. The profundity of his remarks and +interrogatories astonished his old grandfather, who perfectly bored the +club at the tavern with stories about the little lad's learning and +genius. He suffered his grandmother with a good-humoured +indifference. The small circle round about him believed that the equal +of the boy did not exist upon the earth. Georgy inherited his father's +pride, and perhaps thought they were not wrong. + +When he grew to be about six years old, Dobbin began to write to him +very much. The Major wanted to hear that Georgy was going to a school +and hoped he would acquit himself with credit there: or would he have +a good tutor at home? It was time that he should begin to learn; and +his godfather and guardian hinted that he hoped to be allowed to defray +the charges of the boy's education, which would fall heavily upon his +mother's straitened income. The Major, in a word, was always thinking +about Amelia and her little boy, and by orders to his agents kept the +latter provided with picture-books, paint-boxes, desks, and all +conceivable implements of amusement and instruction. Three days before +George's sixth birthday a gentleman in a gig, accompanied by a servant, +drove up to Mr. Sedley's house and asked to see Master George Osborne: +it was Mr. Woolsey, military tailor, of Conduit Street, who came at the +Major's order to measure the young gentleman for a suit of clothes. He +had had the honour of making for the Captain, the young gentleman's +father. Sometimes, too, and by the Major's desire no doubt, his +sisters, the Misses Dobbin, would call in the family carriage to take +Amelia and the little boy to drive if they were so inclined. The +patronage and kindness of these ladies was very uncomfortable to +Amelia, but she bore it meekly enough, for her nature was to yield; +and, besides, the carriage and its splendours gave little Georgy +immense pleasure. The ladies begged occasionally that the child might +pass a day with them, and he was always glad to go to that fine +garden-house at Denmark Hill, where they lived, and where there were +such fine grapes in the hot-houses and peaches on the walls. + +One day they kindly came over to Amelia with news which they were SURE +would delight her--something VERY interesting about their dear William. + +"What was it: was he coming home?" she asked with pleasure beaming in +her eyes. + +"Oh, no--not the least--but they had very good reason to believe that +dear William was about to be married--and to a relation of a very dear +friend of Amelia's--to Miss Glorvina O'Dowd, Sir Michael O'Dowd's +sister, who had gone out to join Lady O'Dowd at Madras--a very +beautiful and accomplished girl, everybody said." + +Amelia said "Oh!" Amelia was very VERY happy indeed. But she supposed +Glorvina could not be like her old acquaintance, who was most +kind--but--but she was very happy indeed. And by some impulse of which +I cannot explain the meaning, she took George in her arms and kissed +him with an extraordinary tenderness. Her eyes were quite moist when +she put the child down; and she scarcely spoke a word during the whole +of the drive--though she was so very happy indeed. + + + +CHAPTER XXXIX + +A Cynical Chapter + +Our duty now takes us back for a brief space to some old Hampshire +acquaintances of ours, whose hopes respecting the disposal of their +rich kinswoman's property were so woefully disappointed. After +counting upon thirty thousand pounds from his sister, it was a heavy +blow to Bute Crawley to receive but five; out of which sum, when he +had paid his own debts and those of Jim, his son at college, a very +small fragment remained to portion off his four plain daughters. Mrs. +Bute never knew, or at least never acknowledged, how far her own +tyrannous behaviour had tended to ruin her husband. All that woman +could do, she vowed and protested she had done. Was it her fault if +she did not possess those sycophantic arts which her hypocritical +nephew, Pitt Crawley, practised? She wished him all the happiness which +he merited out of his ill-gotten gains. "At least the money will +remain in the family," she said charitably. "Pitt will never spend it, +my dear, that is quite certain; for a greater miser does not exist in +England, and he is as odious, though in a different way, as his +spendthrift brother, the abandoned Rawdon." + +So Mrs. Bute, after the first shock of rage and disappointment, began +to accommodate herself as best she could to her altered fortunes and to +save and retrench with all her might. She instructed her daughters how +to bear poverty cheerfully, and invented a thousand notable methods to +conceal or evade it. She took them about to balls and public places in +the neighbourhood, with praiseworthy energy; nay, she entertained her +friends in a hospitable comfortable manner at the Rectory, and much +more frequently than before dear Miss Crawley's legacy had fallen in. +From her outward bearing nobody would have supposed that the family had +been disappointed in their expectations, or have guessed from her +frequent appearance in public how she pinched and starved at home. Her +girls had more milliners' furniture than they had ever enjoyed before. +They appeared perseveringly at the Winchester and Southampton +assemblies; they penetrated to Cowes for the race-balls and +regatta-gaieties there; and their carriage, with the horses taken from +the plough, was at work perpetually, until it began almost to be +believed that the four sisters had had fortunes left them by their +aunt, whose name the family never mentioned in public but with the most +tender gratitude and regard. I know no sort of lying which is more +frequent in Vanity Fair than this, and it may be remarked how people +who practise it take credit to themselves for their hypocrisy, and +fancy that they are exceedingly virtuous and praiseworthy, because they +are able to deceive the world with regard to the extent of their means. + +Mrs. Bute certainly thought herself one of the most virtuous women in +England, and the sight of her happy family was an edifying one to +strangers. They were so cheerful, so loving, so well-educated, so +simple! Martha painted flowers exquisitely and furnished half the +charity bazaars in the county. Emma was a regular County Bulbul, and +her verses in the Hampshire Telegraph were the glory of its Poet's +Corner. Fanny and Matilda sang duets together, Mamma playing the +piano, and the other two sisters sitting with their arms round each +other's waists and listening affectionately. Nobody saw the poor girls +drumming at the duets in private. No one saw Mamma drilling them +rigidly hour after hour. In a word, Mrs. Bute put a good face against +fortune and kept up appearances in the most virtuous manner. + +Everything that a good and respectable mother could do Mrs. Bute did. +She got over yachting men from Southampton, parsons from the Cathedral +Close at Winchester, and officers from the barracks there. She tried to +inveigle the young barristers at assizes and encouraged Jim to bring +home friends with whom he went out hunting with the H. H. What will +not a mother do for the benefit of her beloved ones? + +Between such a woman and her brother-in-law, the odious Baronet at the +Hall, it is manifest that there could be very little in common. The +rupture between Bute and his brother Sir Pitt was complete; indeed, +between Sir Pitt and the whole county, to which the old man was a +scandal. His dislike for respectable society increased with age, and +the lodge-gates had not opened to a gentleman's carriage-wheels since +Pitt and Lady Jane came to pay their visit of duty after their marriage. + +That was an awful and unfortunate visit, never to be thought of by the +family without horror. Pitt begged his wife, with a ghastly +countenance, never to speak of it, and it was only through Mrs. Bute +herself, who still knew everything which took place at the Hall, that +the circumstances of Sir Pitt's reception of his son and +daughter-in-law were ever known at all. + +As they drove up the avenue of the park in their neat and +well-appointed carriage, Pitt remarked with dismay and wrath great gaps +among the trees--his trees--which the old Baronet was felling entirely +without license. The park wore an aspect of utter dreariness and ruin. +The drives were ill kept, and the neat carriage splashed and floundered +in muddy pools along the road. The great sweep in front of the terrace +and entrance stair was black and covered with mosses; the once trim +flower-beds rank and weedy. Shutters were up along almost the whole +line of the house; the great hall-door was unbarred after much ringing +of the bell; an individual in ribbons was seen flitting up the black +oak stair, as Horrocks at length admitted the heir of Queen's Crawley +and his bride into the halls of their fathers. He led the way into Sir +Pitt's "Library," as it was called, the fumes of tobacco growing +stronger as Pitt and Lady Jane approached that apartment, "Sir Pitt +ain't very well," Horrocks remarked apologetically and hinted that his +master was afflicted with lumbago. + +The library looked out on the front walk and park. Sir Pitt had opened +one of the windows, and was bawling out thence to the postilion and +Pitt's servant, who seemed to be about to take the baggage down. + +"Don't move none of them trunks," he cried, pointing with a pipe which +he held in his hand. "It's only a morning visit, Tucker, you fool. +Lor, what cracks that off hoss has in his heels! Ain't there no one at +the King's Head to rub 'em a little? How do, Pitt? How do, my dear? +Come to see the old man, hay? 'Gad--you've a pretty face, too. You +ain't like that old horse-godmother, your mother. Come and give old +Pitt a kiss, like a good little gal." + +The embrace disconcerted the daughter-in-law somewhat, as the caresses +of the old gentleman, unshorn and perfumed with tobacco, might well do. +But she remembered that her brother Southdown had mustachios, and +smoked cigars, and submitted to the Baronet with a tolerable grace. + +"Pitt has got vat," said the Baronet, after this mark of affection. +"Does he read ee very long zermons, my dear? Hundredth Psalm, Evening +Hymn, hay Pitt? Go and get a glass of Malmsey and a cake for my Lady +Jane, Horrocks, you great big booby, and don't stand stearing there +like a fat pig. I won't ask you to stop, my dear; you'll find it too +stoopid, and so should I too along a Pitt. I'm an old man now, and +like my own ways, and my pipe and backgammon of a night." + +"I can play at backgammon, sir," said Lady Jane, laughing. "I used to +play with Papa and Miss Crawley, didn't I, Mr. Crawley?" + +"Lady Jane can play, sir, at the game to which you state that you are +so partial," Pitt said haughtily. + +"But she wawn't stop for all that. Naw, naw, goo back to Mudbury and +give Mrs. Rincer a benefit; or drive down to the Rectory and ask Buty +for a dinner. He'll be charmed to see you, you know; he's so much +obliged to you for gettin' the old woman's money. Ha, ha! Some of it +will do to patch up the Hall when I'm gone." + +"I perceive, sir," said Pitt with a heightened voice, "that your people +will cut down the timber." + +"Yees, yees, very fine weather, and seasonable for the time of year," +Sir Pitt answered, who had suddenly grown deaf. "But I'm gittin' old, +Pitt, now. Law bless you, you ain't far from fifty yourself. But he +wears well, my pretty Lady Jane, don't he? It's all godliness, +sobriety, and a moral life. Look at me, I'm not very fur from +fowr-score--he, he"; and he laughed, and took snuff, and leered at her +and pinched her hand. + +Pitt once more brought the conversation back to the timber, but the +Baronet was deaf again in an instant. + +"I'm gittin' very old, and have been cruel bad this year with the +lumbago. I shan't be here now for long; but I'm glad ee've come, +daughter-in-law. I like your face, Lady Jane: it's got none of the +damned high-boned Binkie look in it; and I'll give ee something pretty, +my dear, to go to Court in." And he shuffled across the room to a +cupboard, from which he took a little old case containing jewels of +some value. "Take that," said he, "my dear; it belonged to my mother, +and afterwards to the first Lady Binkie. Pretty pearls--never gave 'em +the ironmonger's daughter. No, no. Take 'em and put 'em up quick," +said he, thrusting the case into his daughter's hand, and clapping the +door of the cabinet to, as Horrocks entered with a salver and +refreshments. + +"What have you a been and given Pitt's wife?" said the individual in +ribbons, when Pitt and Lady Jane had taken leave of the old gentleman. +It was Miss Horrocks, the butler's daughter--the cause of the scandal +throughout the county--the lady who reigned now almost supreme at +Queen's Crawley. + +The rise and progress of those Ribbons had been marked with dismay by +the county and family. The Ribbons opened an account at the Mudbury +Branch Savings Bank; the Ribbons drove to church, monopolising the +pony-chaise, which was for the use of the servants at the Hall. The +domestics were dismissed at her pleasure. The Scotch gardener, who +still lingered on the premises, taking a pride in his walls and +hot-houses, and indeed making a pretty good livelihood by the garden, +which he farmed, and of which he sold the produce at Southampton, found +the Ribbons eating peaches on a sunshiny morning at the south-wall, and +had his ears boxed when he remonstrated about this attack on his +property. He and his Scotch wife and his Scotch children, the only +respectable inhabitants of Queen's Crawley, were forced to migrate, +with their goods and their chattels, and left the stately comfortable +gardens to go to waste, and the flower-beds to run to seed. Poor Lady +Crawley's rose-garden became the dreariest wilderness. Only two or +three domestics shuddered in the bleak old servants' hall. The stables +and offices were vacant, and shut up, and half ruined. Sir Pitt lived +in private, and boozed nightly with Horrocks, his butler or house-steward +(as he now began to be called), and the abandoned Ribbons. The +times were very much changed since the period when she drove to Mudbury +in the spring-cart and called the small tradesmen "Sir." It may have +been shame, or it may have been dislike of his neighbours, but the old +Cynic of Queen's Crawley hardly issued from his park-gates at all now. +He quarrelled with his agents and screwed his tenants by letter. His +days were passed in conducting his own correspondence; the lawyers and +farm-bailiffs who had to do business with him could not reach him but +through the Ribbons, who received them at the door of the housekeeper's +room, which commanded the back entrance by which they were admitted; +and so the Baronet's daily perplexities increased, and his +embarrassments multiplied round him. + +The horror of Pitt Crawley may be imagined, as these reports of his +father's dotage reached the most exemplary and correct of gentlemen. He +trembled daily lest he should hear that the Ribbons was proclaimed his +second legal mother-in-law. After that first and last visit, his +father's name was never mentioned in Pitt's polite and genteel +establishment. It was the skeleton in his house, and all the family +walked by it in terror and silence. The Countess Southdown kept on +dropping per coach at the lodge-gate the most exciting tracts, tracts +which ought to frighten the hair off your head. Mrs. Bute at the +parsonage nightly looked out to see if the sky was red over the elms +behind which the Hall stood, and the mansion was on fire. Sir G. +Wapshot and Sir H. Fuddlestone, old friends of the house, wouldn't sit +on the bench with Sir Pitt at Quarter Sessions, and cut him dead in the +High Street of Southampton, where the reprobate stood offering his +dirty old hands to them. Nothing had any effect upon him; he put his +hands into his pockets, and burst out laughing, as he scrambled into +his carriage and four; he used to burst out laughing at Lady +Southdown's tracts; and he laughed at his sons, and at the world, and +at the Ribbons when she was angry, which was not seldom. + +Miss Horrocks was installed as housekeeper at Queen's Crawley, and +ruled all the domestics there with great majesty and rigour. All the +servants were instructed to address her as "Mum," or "Madam"--and +there was one little maid, on her promotion, who persisted in calling +her "My Lady," without any rebuke on the part of the housekeeper. +"There has been better ladies, and there has been worser, Hester," was +Miss Horrocks' reply to this compliment of her inferior; so she ruled, +having supreme power over all except her father, whom, however, she +treated with considerable haughtiness, warning him not to be too +familiar in his behaviour to one "as was to be a Baronet's lady." +Indeed, she rehearsed that exalted part in life with great satisfaction +to herself, and to the amusement of old Sir Pitt, who chuckled at her +airs and graces, and would laugh by the hour together at her +assumptions of dignity and imitations of genteel life. He swore it was +as good as a play to see her in the character of a fine dame, and he +made her put on one of the first Lady Crawley's court-dresses, swearing +(entirely to Miss Horrocks' own concurrence) that the dress became her +prodigiously, and threatening to drive her off that very instant to +Court in a coach-and-four. She had the ransacking of the wardrobes of +the two defunct ladies, and cut and hacked their posthumous finery so +as to suit her own tastes and figure. And she would have liked to take +possession of their jewels and trinkets too; but the old Baronet had +locked them away in his private cabinet; nor could she coax or wheedle +him out of the keys. And it is a fact, that some time after she left +Queen's Crawley a copy-book belonging to this lady was discovered, +which showed that she had taken great pains in private to learn the art +of writing in general, and especially of writing her own name as Lady +Crawley, Lady Betsy Horrocks, Lady Elizabeth Crawley, &c. + +Though the good people of the Parsonage never went to the Hall and +shunned the horrid old dotard its owner, yet they kept a strict +knowledge of all that happened there, and were looking out every day +for the catastrophe for which Miss Horrocks was also eager. But Fate +intervened enviously and prevented her from receiving the reward due to +such immaculate love and virtue. + +One day the Baronet surprised "her ladyship," as he jocularly called +her, seated at that old and tuneless piano in the drawing-room, which +had scarcely been touched since Becky Sharp played quadrilles upon +it--seated at the piano with the utmost gravity and squalling to the +best of her power in imitation of the music which she had sometimes +heard. The little kitchen-maid on her promotion was standing at her +mistress's side, quite delighted during the operation, and wagging her +head up and down and crying, "Lor, Mum, 'tis bittiful"--just like a +genteel sycophant in a real drawing-room. + +This incident made the old Baronet roar with laughter, as usual. He +narrated the circumstance a dozen times to Horrocks in the course of +the evening, and greatly to the discomfiture of Miss Horrocks. He +thrummed on the table as if it had been a musical instrument, and +squalled in imitation of her manner of singing. He vowed that such a +beautiful voice ought to be cultivated and declared she ought to have +singing-masters, in which proposals she saw nothing ridiculous. He was +in great spirits that night, and drank with his friend and butler an +extraordinary quantity of rum-and-water--at a very late hour the +faithful friend and domestic conducted his master to his bedroom. + +Half an hour afterwards there was a great hurry and bustle in the +house. Lights went about from window to window in the lonely desolate +old Hall, whereof but two or three rooms were ordinarily occupied by +its owner. Presently, a boy on a pony went galloping off to Mudbury, to +the Doctor's house there. And in another hour (by which fact we +ascertain how carefully the excellent Mrs. Bute Crawley had always kept +up an understanding with the great house), that lady in her clogs and +calash, the Reverend Bute Crawley, and James Crawley, her son, had +walked over from the Rectory through the park, and had entered the +mansion by the open hall-door. + +They passed through the hall and the small oak parlour, on the table of +which stood the three tumblers and the empty rum-bottle which had +served for Sir Pitt's carouse, and through that apartment into Sir +Pitt's study, where they found Miss Horrocks, of the guilty ribbons, +with a wild air, trying at the presses and escritoires with a bunch of +keys. She dropped them with a scream of terror, as little Mrs. Bute's +eyes flashed out at her from under her black calash. + +"Look at that, James and Mr. Crawley," cried Mrs. Bute, pointing at the +scared figure of the black-eyed, guilty wench. + +"He gave 'em me; he gave 'em me!" she cried. + +"Gave them you, you abandoned creature!" screamed Mrs. Bute. "Bear +witness, Mr. Crawley, we found this good-for-nothing woman in the act +of stealing your brother's property; and she will be hanged, as I +always said she would." + +Betsy Horrocks, quite daunted, flung herself down on her knees, +bursting into tears. But those who know a really good woman are aware +that she is not in a hurry to forgive, and that the humiliation of an +enemy is a triumph to her soul. + +"Ring the bell, James," Mrs. Bute said. "Go on ringing it till the +people come." The three or four domestics resident in the deserted old +house came presently at that jangling and continued summons. + +"Put that woman in the strong-room," she said. "We caught her in the +act of robbing Sir Pitt. Mr. Crawley, you'll make out her +committal--and, Beddoes, you'll drive her over in the spring cart, in +the morning, to Southampton Gaol." + +"My dear," interposed the Magistrate and Rector--"she's only--" + +"Are there no handcuffs?" Mrs. Bute continued, stamping in her clogs. +"There used to be handcuffs. Where's the creature's abominable father?" + +"He DID give 'em me," still cried poor Betsy; "didn't he, Hester? You +saw Sir Pitt--you know you did--give 'em me, ever so long ago--the day +after Mudbury fair: not that I want 'em. Take 'em if you think they +ain't mine." And here the unhappy wretch pulled out from her pocket a +large pair of paste shoe-buckles which had excited her admiration, and +which she had just appropriated out of one of the bookcases in the +study, where they had lain. + +"Law, Betsy, how could you go for to tell such a wicked story!" said +Hester, the little kitchen-maid late on her promotion--"and to Madame +Crawley, so good and kind, and his Rev'rince (with a curtsey), and you +may search all MY boxes, Mum, I'm sure, and here's my keys as I'm an +honest girl, though of pore parents and workhouse bred--and if you find +so much as a beggarly bit of lace or a silk stocking out of all the +gownds as YOU'VE had the picking of, may I never go to church agin." + +"Give up your keys, you hardened hussy," hissed out the virtuous little +lady in the calash. + +"And here's a candle, Mum, and if you please, Mum, I can show you her +room, Mum, and the press in the housekeeper's room, Mum, where she +keeps heaps and heaps of things, Mum," cried out the eager little +Hester with a profusion of curtseys. + +"Hold your tongue, if you please. I know the room which the creature +occupies perfectly well. Mrs. Brown, have the goodness to come with +me, and Beddoes don't you lose sight of that woman," said Mrs. Bute, +seizing the candle. "Mr. Crawley, you had better go upstairs and see +that they are not murdering your unfortunate brother"--and the calash, +escorted by Mrs. Brown, walked away to the apartment which, as she said +truly, she knew perfectly well. + +Bute went upstairs and found the Doctor from Mudbury, with the +frightened Horrocks over his master in a chair. They were trying to +bleed Sir Pitt Crawley. + +With the early morning an express was sent off to Mr. Pitt Crawley by +the Rector's lady, who assumed the command of everything, and had +watched the old Baronet through the night. He had been brought back to +a sort of life; he could not speak, but seemed to recognize people. +Mrs. Bute kept resolutely by his bedside. She never seemed to want to +sleep, that little woman, and did not close her fiery black eyes once, +though the Doctor snored in the arm-chair. Horrocks made some wild +efforts to assert his authority and assist his master; but Mrs. Bute +called him a tipsy old wretch and bade him never show his face again in +that house, or he should be transported like his abominable daughter. + +Terrified by her manner, he slunk down to the oak parlour where Mr. +James was, who, having tried the bottle standing there and found no +liquor in it, ordered Mr. Horrocks to get another bottle of rum, which +he fetched, with clean glasses, and to which the Rector and his son sat +down, ordering Horrocks to put down the keys at that instant and never +to show his face again. + +Cowed by this behaviour, Horrocks gave up the keys, and he and his +daughter slunk off silently through the night and gave up possession of +the house of Queen's Crawley. + + + +CHAPTER XL + +In Which Becky Is Recognized by the Family + +The heir of Crawley arrived at home, in due time, after this +catastrophe, and henceforth may be said to have reigned in Queen's +Crawley. For though the old Baronet survived many months, he never +recovered the use of his intellect or his speech completely, and the +government of the estate devolved upon his elder son. In a strange +condition Pitt found it. Sir Pitt was always buying and mortgaging; he +had twenty men of business, and quarrels with each; quarrels with all +his tenants, and lawsuits with them; lawsuits with the lawyers; +lawsuits with the Mining and Dock Companies in which he was proprietor; +and with every person with whom he had business. To unravel these +difficulties and to set the estate clear was a task worthy of the +orderly and persevering diplomatist of Pumpernickel, and he set himself +to work with prodigious assiduity. His whole family, of course, was +transported to Queen's Crawley, whither Lady Southdown, of course, came +too; and she set about converting the parish under the Rector's nose, +and brought down her irregular clergy to the dismay of the angry Mrs +Bute. Sir Pitt had concluded no bargain for the sale of the living of +Queen's Crawley; when it should drop, her Ladyship proposed to take the +patronage into her own hands and present a young protege to the +Rectory, on which subject the diplomatic Pitt said nothing. + +Mrs. Bute's intentions with regard to Miss Betsy Horrocks were not +carried into effect, and she paid no visit to Southampton Gaol. She +and her father left the Hall when the latter took possession of the +Crawley Arms in the village, of which he had got a lease from Sir Pitt. +The ex-butler had obtained a small freehold there likewise, which gave +him a vote for the borough. The Rector had another of these votes, and +these and four others formed the representative body which returned the +two members for Queen's Crawley. + +There was a show of courtesy kept up between the Rectory and the Hall +ladies, between the younger ones at least, for Mrs. Bute and Lady +Southdown never could meet without battles, and gradually ceased seeing +each other. Her Ladyship kept her room when the ladies from the +Rectory visited their cousins at the Hall. Perhaps Mr. Pitt was not +very much displeased at these occasional absences of his mamma-in-law. +He believed the Binkie family to be the greatest and wisest and most +interesting in the world, and her Ladyship and his aunt had long held +ascendency over him; but sometimes he felt that she commanded him too +much. To be considered young was complimentary, doubtless, but at +six-and-forty to be treated as a boy was sometimes mortifying. Lady +Jane yielded up everything, however, to her mother. She was only fond +of her children in private, and it was lucky for her that Lady +Southdown's multifarious business, her conferences with ministers, and +her correspondence with all the missionaries of Africa, Asia, and +Australasia, &c., occupied the venerable Countess a great deal, so that +she had but little time to devote to her granddaughter, the little +Matilda, and her grandson, Master Pitt Crawley. The latter was a feeble +child, and it was only by prodigious quantities of calomel that Lady +Southdown was able to keep him in life at all. + +As for Sir Pitt he retired into those very apartments where Lady +Crawley had been previously extinguished, and here was tended by Miss +Hester, the girl upon her promotion, with constant care and assiduity. +What love, what fidelity, what constancy is there equal to that of a +nurse with good wages? They smooth pillows; and make arrowroot; they +get up at nights; they bear complaints and querulousness; they see the +sun shining out of doors and don't want to go abroad; they sleep on +arm-chairs and eat their meals in solitude; they pass long long +evenings doing nothing, watching the embers, and the patient's drink +simmering in the jug; they read the weekly paper the whole week +through; and Law's Serious Call or the Whole Duty of Man suffices them +for literature for the year--and we quarrel with them because, when +their relations come to see them once a week, a little gin is smuggled +in in their linen basket. Ladies, what man's love is there that would +stand a year's nursing of the object of his affection? Whereas a nurse +will stand by you for ten pounds a quarter, and we think her too highly +paid. At least Mr. Crawley grumbled a good deal about paying half as +much to Miss Hester for her constant attendance upon the Baronet his +father. + +Of sunshiny days this old gentleman was taken out in a chair on the +terrace--the very chair which Miss Crawley had had at Brighton, and +which had been transported thence with a number of Lady Southdown's +effects to Queen's Crawley. Lady Jane always walked by the old man, +and was an evident favourite with him. He used to nod many times to +her and smile when she came in, and utter inarticulate deprecatory +moans when she was going away. When the door shut upon her he would +cry and sob--whereupon Hester's face and manner, which was always +exceedingly bland and gentle while her lady was present, would change +at once, and she would make faces at him and clench her fist and scream +out "Hold your tongue, you stoopid old fool," and twirl away his chair +from the fire which he loved to look at--at which he would cry more. +For this was all that was left after more than seventy years of +cunning, and struggling, and drinking, and scheming, and sin and +selfishness--a whimpering old idiot put in and out of bed and cleaned +and fed like a baby. + +At last a day came when the nurse's occupation was over. Early one +morning, as Pitt Crawley was at his steward's and bailiff's books in +the study, a knock came to the door, and Hester presented herself, +dropping a curtsey, and said, + +"If you please, Sir Pitt, Sir Pitt died this morning, Sir Pitt. I was +a-making of his toast, Sir Pitt, for his gruel, Sir Pitt, which he took +every morning regular at six, Sir Pitt, and--I thought I heard a +moan-like, Sir Pitt--and--and--and--" She dropped another curtsey. + +What was it that made Pitt's pale face flush quite red? Was it because +he was Sir Pitt at last, with a seat in Parliament, and perhaps future +honours in prospect? "I'll clear the estate now with the ready money," +he thought and rapidly calculated its incumbrances and the improvements +which he would make. He would not use his aunt's money previously lest +Sir Pitt should recover and his outlay be in vain. + +All the blinds were pulled down at the Hall and Rectory: the church +bell was tolled, and the chancel hung in black; and Bute Crawley didn't +go to a coursing meeting, but went and dined quietly at Fuddleston, +where they talked about his deceased brother and young Sir Pitt over +their port. Miss Betsy, who was by this time married to a saddler at +Mudbury, cried a good deal. The family surgeon rode over and paid his +respectful compliments, and inquiries for the health of their +ladyships. The death was talked about at Mudbury and at the Crawley +Arms, the landlord whereof had become reconciled with the Rector of +late, who was occasionally known to step into the parlour and taste Mr. +Horrocks' mild beer. + +"Shall I write to your brother--or will you?" asked Lady Jane of her +husband, Sir Pitt. + +"I will write, of course," Sir Pitt said, "and invite him to the +funeral: it will be but becoming." + +"And--and--Mrs. Rawdon," said Lady Jane timidly. + +"Jane!" said Lady Southdown, "how can you think of such a thing?" + +"Mrs. Rawdon must of course be asked," said Sir Pitt, resolutely. + +"Not whilst I am in the house!" said Lady Southdown. + +"Your Ladyship will be pleased to recollect that I am the head of this +family," Sir Pitt replied. "If you please, Lady Jane, you will write a +letter to Mrs. Rawdon Crawley, requesting her presence upon this +melancholy occasion." + +"Jane, I forbid you to put pen to paper!" cried the Countess. + +"I believe I am the head of this family," Sir Pitt repeated; "and +however much I may regret any circumstance which may lead to your +Ladyship quitting this house, must, if you please, continue to govern +it as I see fit." + +Lady Southdown rose up as magnificent as Mrs. Siddons in Lady Macbeth +and ordered that horses might be put to her carriage. If her son and +daughter turned her out of their house, she would hide her sorrows +somewhere in loneliness and pray for their conversion to better +thoughts. + +"We don't turn you out of our house, Mamma," said the timid Lady Jane +imploringly. + +"You invite such company to it as no Christian lady should meet, and I +will have my horses to-morrow morning." + +"Have the goodness to write, Jane, under my dictation," said Sir Pitt, +rising and throwing himself into an attitude of command, like the +portrait of a Gentleman in the Exhibition, "and begin. 'Queen's +Crawley, September 14, 1822.--My dear brother--'" + +Hearing these decisive and terrible words, Lady Macbeth, who had been +waiting for a sign of weakness or vacillation on the part of her +son-in-law, rose and, with a scared look, left the library. Lady Jane +looked up to her husband as if she would fain follow and soothe her +mamma, but Pitt forbade his wife to move. + +"She won't go away," he said. "She has let her house at Brighton and +has spent her last half-year's dividends. A Countess living at an inn +is a ruined woman. I have been waiting long for an opportunity--to +take this--this decisive step, my love; for, as you must perceive, it +is impossible that there should be two chiefs in a family: and now, if +you please, we will resume the dictation. 'My dear brother, the +melancholy intelligence which it is my duty to convey to my family must +have been long anticipated by,'" &c. + +In a word, Pitt having come to his kingdom, and having by good luck, or +desert rather, as he considered, assumed almost all the fortune which +his other relatives had expected, was determined to treat his family +kindly and respectably and make a house of Queen's Crawley once more. +It pleased him to think that he should be its chief. He proposed to +use the vast influence that his commanding talents and position must +speedily acquire for him in the county to get his brother placed and +his cousins decently provided for, and perhaps had a little sting of +repentance as he thought that he was the proprietor of all that they +had hoped for. In the course of three or four days' reign his bearing +was changed and his plans quite fixed: he determined to rule justly +and honestly, to depose Lady Southdown, and to be on the friendliest +possible terms with all the relations of his blood. + +So he dictated a letter to his brother Rawdon--a solemn and elaborate +letter, containing the profoundest observations, couched in the longest +words, and filling with wonder the simple little secretary, who wrote +under her husband's order. "What an orator this will be," thought she, +"when he enters the House of Commons" (on which point, and on the +tyranny of Lady Southdown, Pitt had sometimes dropped hints to his wife +in bed); "how wise and good, and what a genius my husband is! I +fancied him a little cold; but how good, and what a genius!" + +The fact is, Pitt Crawley had got every word of the letter by heart and +had studied it, with diplomatic secrecy, deeply and perfectly, long +before he thought fit to communicate it to his astonished wife. + +This letter, with a huge black border and seal, was accordingly +despatched by Sir Pitt Crawley to his brother the Colonel, in London. +Rawdon Crawley was but half-pleased at the receipt of it. "What's the +use of going down to that stupid place?" thought he. "I can't stand +being alone with Pitt after dinner, and horses there and back will cost +us twenty pound." + +He carried the letter, as he did all difficulties, to Becky, upstairs +in her bedroom--with her chocolate, which he always made and took to +her of a morning. + +He put the tray with the breakfast and the letter on the dressing-table, +before which Becky sat combing her yellow hair. She took up the +black-edged missive, and having read it, she jumped up from the chair, +crying "Hurray!" and waving the note round her head. + +"Hurray?" said Rawdon, wondering at the little figure capering about in +a streaming flannel dressing-gown, with tawny locks dishevelled. "He's +not left us anything, Becky. I had my share when I came of age." + +"You'll never be of age, you silly old man," Becky replied. "Run out +now to Madam Brunoy's, for I must have some mourning: and get a crape +on your hat, and a black waistcoat--I don't think you've got one; order +it to be brought home to-morrow, so that we may be able to start on +Thursday." + +"You don't mean to go?" Rawdon interposed. + +"Of course I mean to go. I mean that Lady Jane shall present me at +Court next year. I mean that your brother shall give you a seat in +Parliament, you stupid old creature. I mean that Lord Steyne shall +have your vote and his, my dear, old silly man; and that you shall be +an Irish Secretary, or a West Indian Governor: or a Treasurer, or a +Consul, or some such thing." + +"Posting will cost a dooce of a lot of money," grumbled Rawdon. + +"We might take Southdown's carriage, which ought to be present at the +funeral, as he is a relation of the family: but, no--I intend that we +shall go by the coach. They'll like it better. It seems more humble--" + +"Rawdy goes, of course?" the Colonel asked. + +"No such thing; why pay an extra place? He's too big to travel bodkin +between you and me. Let him stay here in the nursery, and Briggs can +make him a black frock. Go you, and do as I bid you. And you had best +tell Sparks, your man, that old Sir Pitt is dead and that you will come +in for something considerable when the affairs are arranged. He'll +tell this to Raggles, who has been pressing for money, and it will +console poor Raggles." And so Becky began sipping her chocolate. + +When the faithful Lord Steyne arrived in the evening, he found Becky +and her companion, who was no other than our friend Briggs, busy +cutting, ripping, snipping, and tearing all sorts of black stuffs +available for the melancholy occasion. + +"Miss Briggs and I are plunged in grief and despondency for the death +of our Papa," Rebecca said. "Sir Pitt Crawley is dead, my lord. We +have been tearing our hair all the morning, and now we are tearing up +our old clothes." + +"Oh, Rebecca, how can you--" was all that Briggs could say as she +turned up her eyes. + +"Oh, Rebecca, how can you--" echoed my Lord. "So that old scoundrel's +dead, is he? He might have been a Peer if he had played his cards +better. Mr. Pitt had very nearly made him; but he ratted always at the +wrong time. What an old Silenus it was!" + +"I might have been Silenus's widow," said Rebecca. "Don't you remember, +Miss Briggs, how you peeped in at the door and saw old Sir Pitt on his +knees to me?" Miss Briggs, our old friend, blushed very much at this +reminiscence, and was glad when Lord Steyne ordered her to go +downstairs and make him a cup of tea. + +Briggs was the house-dog whom Rebecca had provided as guardian of her +innocence and reputation. Miss Crawley had left her a little annuity. +She would have been content to remain in the Crawley family with Lady +Jane, who was good to her and to everybody; but Lady Southdown +dismissed poor Briggs as quickly as decency permitted; and Mr. Pitt +(who thought himself much injured by the uncalled-for generosity of his +deceased relative towards a lady who had only been Miss Crawley's +faithful retainer a score of years) made no objection to that exercise +of the dowager's authority. Bowls and Firkin likewise received their +legacies and their dismissals, and married and set up a lodging-house, +according to the custom of their kind. + +Briggs tried to live with her relations in the country, but found that +attempt was vain after the better society to which she had been +accustomed. Briggs's friends, small tradesmen, in a country town, +quarrelled over Miss Briggs's forty pounds a year as eagerly and more +openly than Miss Crawley's kinsfolk had for that lady's inheritance. +Briggs's brother, a radical hatter and grocer, called his sister a +purse-proud aristocrat, because she would not advance a part of her +capital to stock his shop; and she would have done so most likely, but +that their sister, a dissenting shoemaker's lady, at variance with the +hatter and grocer, who went to another chapel, showed how their brother +was on the verge of bankruptcy, and took possession of Briggs for a +while. The dissenting shoemaker wanted Miss Briggs to send his son to +college and make a gentleman of him. Between them the two families got +a great portion of her private savings out of her, and finally she fled +to London followed by the anathemas of both, and determined to seek for +servitude again as infinitely less onerous than liberty. And +advertising in the papers that a "Gentlewoman of agreeable manners, and +accustomed to the best society, was anxious to," &c., she took up her +residence with Mr. Bowls in Half Moon Street, and waited the result of +the advertisement. + +So it was that she fell in with Rebecca. Mrs. Rawdon's dashing little +carriage and ponies was whirling down the street one day, just as Miss +Briggs, fatigued, had reached Mr. Bowls's door, after a weary walk to +the Times Office in the City to insert her advertisement for the sixth +time. Rebecca was driving, and at once recognized the gentlewoman with +agreeable manners, and being a perfectly good-humoured woman, as we +have seen, and having a regard for Briggs, she pulled up the ponies at +the doorsteps, gave the reins to the groom, and jumping out, had hold +of both Briggs's hands, before she of the agreeable manners had +recovered from the shock of seeing an old friend. + +Briggs cried, and Becky laughed a great deal and kissed the gentlewoman +as soon as they got into the passage; and thence into Mrs. Bowls's +front parlour, with the red moreen curtains, and the round +looking-glass, with the chained eagle above, gazing upon the back of +the ticket in the window which announced "Apartments to Let." + +Briggs told all her history amidst those perfectly uncalled-for sobs +and ejaculations of wonder with which women of her soft nature salute +an old acquaintance, or regard a rencontre in the street; for though +people meet other people every day, yet some there are who insist upon +discovering miracles; and women, even though they have disliked each +other, begin to cry when they meet, deploring and remembering the time +when they last quarrelled. So, in a word, Briggs told all her history, +and Becky gave a narrative of her own life, with her usual artlessness +and candour. + +Mrs. Bowls, late Firkin, came and listened grimly in the passage to the +hysterical sniffling and giggling which went on in the front parlour. +Becky had never been a favourite of hers. Since the establishment of +the married couple in London they had frequented their former friends +of the house of Raggles, and did not like the latter's account of the +Colonel's menage. "I wouldn't trust him, Ragg, my boy," Bowls +remarked; and his wife, when Mrs. Rawdon issued from the parlour, only +saluted the lady with a very sour curtsey; and her fingers were like so +many sausages, cold and lifeless, when she held them out in deference +to Mrs. Rawdon, who persisted in shaking hands with the retired lady's +maid. She whirled away into Piccadilly, nodding with the sweetest of +smiles towards Miss Briggs, who hung nodding at the window close under +the advertisement-card, and at the next moment was in the park with a +half-dozen of dandies cantering after her carriage. + +When she found how her friend was situated, and how having a snug +legacy from Miss Crawley, salary was no object to our gentlewoman, +Becky instantly formed some benevolent little domestic plans concerning +her. This was just such a companion as would suit her establishment, +and she invited Briggs to come to dinner with her that very evening, +when she should see Becky's dear little darling Rawdon. + +Mrs. Bowls cautioned her lodger against venturing into the lion's den, +"wherein you will rue it, Miss B., mark my words, and as sure as my +name is Bowls." And Briggs promised to be very cautious. The upshot of +which caution was that she went to live with Mrs. Rawdon the next week, +and had lent Rawdon Crawley six hundred pounds upon annuity before six +months were over. + + + +CHAPTER XLI + +In Which Becky Revisits the Halls of Her Ancestors + +So the mourning being ready, and Sir Pitt Crawley warned of their +arrival, Colonel Crawley and his wife took a couple of places in the +same old High-flyer coach by which Rebecca had travelled in the defunct +Baronet's company, on her first journey into the world some nine years +before. How well she remembered the Inn Yard, and the ostler to whom +she refused money, and the insinuating Cambridge lad who wrapped her in +his coat on the journey! Rawdon took his place outside, and would have +liked to drive, but his grief forbade him. He sat by the coachman and +talked about horses and the road the whole way; and who kept the inns, +and who horsed the coach by which he had travelled so many a time, when +he and Pitt were boys going to Eton. At Mudbury a carriage and a pair +of horses received them, with a coachman in black. "It's the old drag, +Rawdon," Rebecca said as they got in. "The worms have eaten the cloth +a good deal--there's the stain which Sir Pitt--ha! I see Dawson the +Ironmonger has his shutters up--which Sir Pitt made such a noise about. +It was a bottle of cherry brandy he broke which we went to fetch for +your aunt from Southampton. How time flies, to be sure! That can't be +Polly Talboys, that bouncing girl standing by her mother at the cottage +there. I remember her a mangy little urchin picking weeds in the +garden." + +"Fine gal," said Rawdon, returning the salute which the cottage gave +him, by two fingers applied to his crape hatband. Becky bowed and +saluted, and recognized people here and there graciously. These +recognitions were inexpressibly pleasant to her. It seemed as if she +was not an imposter any more, and was coming to the home of her +ancestors. Rawdon was rather abashed and cast down, on the other hand. +What recollections of boyhood and innocence might have been flitting +across his brain? What pangs of dim remorse and doubt and shame? + +"Your sisters must be young women now," Rebecca said, thinking of those +girls for the first time perhaps since she had left them. + +"Don't know, I'm shaw," replied the Colonel. "Hullo! here's old Mother +Lock. How-dy-do, Mrs. Lock? Remember me, don't you? Master Rawdon, +hey? Dammy how those old women last; she was a hundred when I was a +boy." + +They were going through the lodge-gates kept by old Mrs. Lock, whose +hand Rebecca insisted upon shaking, as she flung open the creaking old +iron gate, and the carriage passed between the two moss-grown pillars +surmounted by the dove and serpent. + +"The governor has cut into the timber," Rawdon said, looking about, and +then was silent--so was Becky. Both of them were rather agitated, and +thinking of old times. He about Eton, and his mother, whom he +remembered, a frigid demure woman, and a sister who died, of whom he +had been passionately fond; and how he used to thrash Pitt; and about +little Rawdy at home. And Rebecca thought about her own youth and the +dark secrets of those early tainted days; and of her entrance into life +by yonder gates; and of Miss Pinkerton, and Joe, and Amelia. + +The gravel walk and terrace had been scraped quite clean. A grand +painted hatchment was already over the great entrance, and two very +solemn and tall personages in black flung open each a leaf of the door +as the carriage pulled up at the familiar steps. Rawdon turned red, +and Becky somewhat pale, as they passed through the old hall, arm in +arm. She pinched her husband's arm as they entered the oak parlour, +where Sir Pitt and his wife were ready to receive them. Sir Pitt in +black, Lady Jane in black, and my Lady Southdown with a large black +head-piece of bugles and feathers, which waved on her Ladyship's head +like an undertaker's tray. + +Sir Pitt had judged correctly, that she would not quit the premises. +She contented herself by preserving a solemn and stony silence, when in +company of Pitt and his rebellious wife, and by frightening the +children in the nursery by the ghastly gloom of her demeanour. Only a +very faint bending of the head-dress and plumes welcomed Rawdon and his +wife, as those prodigals returned to their family. + +To say the truth, they were not affected very much one way or other by +this coolness. Her Ladyship was a person only of secondary +consideration in their minds just then--they were intent upon the +reception which the reigning brother and sister would afford them. + +Pitt, with rather a heightened colour, went up and shook his brother by +the hand, and saluted Rebecca with a hand-shake and a very low bow. +But Lady Jane took both the hands of her sister-in-law and kissed her +affectionately. The embrace somehow brought tears into the eyes of the +little adventuress--which ornaments, as we know, she wore very seldom. +The artless mark of kindness and confidence touched and pleased her; +and Rawdon, encouraged by this demonstration on his sister's part, +twirled up his mustachios and took leave to salute Lady Jane with a +kiss, which caused her Ladyship to blush exceedingly. + +"Dev'lish nice little woman, Lady Jane," was his verdict, when he and +his wife were together again. "Pitt's got fat, too, and is doing the +thing handsomely." "He can afford it," said Rebecca and agreed in her +husband's farther opinion "that the mother-in-law was a tremendous old +Guy--and that the sisters were rather well-looking young women." + +They, too, had been summoned from school to attend the funeral +ceremonies. It seemed Sir Pitt Crawley, for the dignity of the house +and family, had thought right to have about the place as many persons +in black as could possibly be assembled. All the men and maids of the +house, the old women of the Alms House, whom the elder Sir Pitt had +cheated out of a great portion of their due, the parish clerk's family, +and the special retainers of both Hall and Rectory were habited in +sable; added to these, the undertaker's men, at least a score, with +crapes and hatbands, and who made goodly show when the great burying +show took place--but these are mute personages in our drama; and having +nothing to do or say, need occupy a very little space here. + +With regard to her sisters-in-law Rebecca did not attempt to forget her +former position of Governess towards them, but recalled it frankly and +kindly, and asked them about their studies with great gravity, and told +them that she had thought of them many and many a day, and longed to +know of their welfare. In fact you would have supposed that ever since +she had left them she had not ceased to keep them uppermost in her +thoughts and to take the tenderest interest in their welfare. So +supposed Lady Crawley herself and her young sisters. + +"She's hardly changed since eight years," said Miss Rosalind to Miss +Violet, as they were preparing for dinner. + +"Those red-haired women look wonderfully well," replied the other. + +"Hers is much darker than it was; I think she must dye it," Miss +Rosalind added. "She is stouter, too, and altogether improved," +continued Miss Rosalind, who was disposed to be very fat. + +"At least she gives herself no airs and remembers that she was our +Governess once," Miss Violet said, intimating that it befitted all +governesses to keep their proper place, and forgetting altogether that +she was granddaughter not only of Sir Walpole Crawley, but of Mr. +Dawson of Mudbury, and so had a coal-scuttle in her scutcheon. There +are other very well-meaning people whom one meets every day in Vanity +Fair who are surely equally oblivious. + +"It can't be true what the girls at the Rectory said, that her mother +was an opera-dancer--" + +"A person can't help their birth," Rosalind replied with great +liberality. "And I agree with our brother, that as she is in the +family, of course we are bound to notice her. I am sure Aunt Bute need +not talk; she wants to marry Kate to young Hooper, the wine-merchant, +and absolutely asked him to come to the Rectory for orders." + +"I wonder whether Lady Southdown will go away, she looked very glum +upon Mrs. Rawdon," the other said. + +"I wish she would. I won't read the Washerwoman of Finchley Common," +vowed Violet; and so saying, and avoiding a passage at the end of which +a certain coffin was placed with a couple of watchers, and lights +perpetually burning in the closed room, these young women came down to +the family dinner, for which the bell rang as usual. + +But before this, Lady Jane conducted Rebecca to the apartments prepared +for her, which, with the rest of the house, had assumed a very much +improved appearance of order and comfort during Pitt's regency, and +here beholding that Mrs. Rawdon's modest little trunks had arrived, and +were placed in the bedroom and dressing-room adjoining, helped her to +take off her neat black bonnet and cloak, and asked her sister-in-law +in what more she could be useful. + +"What I should like best," said Rebecca, "would be to go to the nursery +and see your dear little children." On which the two ladies looked very +kindly at each other and went to that apartment hand in hand. + +Becky admired little Matilda, who was not quite four years old, as the +most charming little love in the world; and the boy, a little fellow of +two years--pale, heavy-eyed, and large-headed--she pronounced to be a +perfect prodigy in point of size, intelligence, and beauty. + +"I wish Mamma would not insist on giving him so much medicine," Lady +Jane said with a sigh. "I often think we should all be better without +it." And then Lady Jane and her new-found friend had one of those +confidential medical conversations about the children, which all +mothers, and most women, as I am given to understand, delight in. Fifty +years ago, and when the present writer, being an interesting little +boy, was ordered out of the room with the ladies after dinner, I +remember quite well that their talk was chiefly about their ailments; +and putting this question directly to two or three since, I have always +got from them the acknowledgement that times are not changed. Let my +fair readers remark for themselves this very evening when they quit the +dessert-table and assemble to celebrate the drawing-room mysteries. +Well--in half an hour Becky and Lady Jane were close and intimate +friends--and in the course of the evening her Ladyship informed Sir +Pitt that she thought her new sister-in-law was a kind, frank, +unaffected, and affectionate young woman. + +And so having easily won the daughter's good-will, the indefatigable +little woman bent herself to conciliate the august Lady Southdown. As +soon as she found her Ladyship alone, Rebecca attacked her on the +nursery question at once and said that her own little boy was saved, +actually saved, by calomel, freely administered, when all the +physicians in Paris had given the dear child up. And then she +mentioned how often she had heard of Lady Southdown from that excellent +man the Reverend Lawrence Grills, Minister of the chapel in May Fair, +which she frequented; and how her views were very much changed by +circumstances and misfortunes; and how she hoped that a past life spent +in worldliness and error might not incapacitate her from more serious +thought for the future. She described how in former days she had been +indebted to Mr. Crawley for religious instruction, touched upon the +Washerwoman of Finchley Common, which she had read with the greatest +profit, and asked about Lady Emily, its gifted author, now Lady Emily +Hornblower, at Cape Town, where her husband had strong hopes of +becoming Bishop of Caffraria. + +But she crowned all, and confirmed herself in Lady Southdown's favour, +by feeling very much agitated and unwell after the funeral and +requesting her Ladyship's medical advice, which the Dowager not only +gave, but, wrapped up in a bed-gown and looking more like Lady Macbeth +than ever, came privately in the night to Becky's room with a parcel of +favourite tracts, and a medicine of her own composition, which she +insisted that Mrs. Rawdon should take. + +Becky first accepted the tracts and began to examine them with great +interest, engaging the Dowager in a conversation concerning them and +the welfare of her soul, by which means she hoped that her body might +escape medication. But after the religious topics were exhausted, Lady +Macbeth would not quit Becky's chamber until her cup of night-drink was +emptied too; and poor Mrs. Rawdon was compelled actually to assume a +look of gratitude, and to swallow the medicine under the unyielding old +Dowager's nose, who left her victim finally with a benediction. + +It did not much comfort Mrs. Rawdon; her countenance was very queer +when Rawdon came in and heard what had happened; and his explosions +of laughter were as loud as usual, when Becky, with a fun which she +could not disguise, even though it was at her own expense, described +the occurrence and how she had been victimized by Lady Southdown. Lord +Steyne, and her son in London, had many a laugh over the story when +Rawdon and his wife returned to their quarters in May Fair. Becky +acted the whole scene for them. She put on a night-cap and gown. She +preached a great sermon in the true serious manner; she lectured on the +virtue of the medicine which she pretended to administer, with a +gravity of imitation so perfect that you would have thought it was the +Countess's own Roman nose through which she snuffled. "Give us Lady +Southdown and the black dose," was a constant cry amongst the folks in +Becky's little drawing-room in May Fair. And for the first time in her +life the Dowager Countess of Southdown was made amusing. + +Sir Pitt remembered the testimonies of respect and veneration which +Rebecca had paid personally to himself in early days, and was tolerably +well disposed towards her. The marriage, ill-advised as it was, had +improved Rawdon very much--that was clear from the Colonel's altered +habits and demeanour--and had it not been a lucky union as regarded +Pitt himself? The cunning diplomatist smiled inwardly as he owned that +he owed his fortune to it, and acknowledged that he at least ought not +to cry out against it. His satisfaction was not removed by Rebecca's +own statements, behaviour, and conversation. + +She doubled the deference which before had charmed him, calling out his +conversational powers in such a manner as quite to surprise Pitt +himself, who, always inclined to respect his own talents, admired them +the more when Rebecca pointed them out to him. With her sister-in-law, +Rebecca was satisfactorily able to prove that it was Mrs. Bute Crawley +who brought about the marriage which she afterwards so calumniated; +that it was Mrs. Bute's avarice--who hoped to gain all Miss Crawley's +fortune and deprive Rawdon of his aunt's favour--which caused and +invented all the wicked reports against Rebecca. "She succeeded in +making us poor," Rebecca said with an air of angelical patience; "but +how can I be angry with a woman who has given me one of the best +husbands in the world? And has not her own avarice been sufficiently +punished by the ruin of her own hopes and the loss of the property by +which she set so much store? Poor!" she cried. "Dear Lady Jane, what +care we for poverty? I am used to it from childhood, and I am often +thankful that Miss Crawley's money has gone to restore the splendour of +the noble old family of which I am so proud to be a member. I am sure +Sir Pitt will make a much better use of it than Rawdon would." + +All these speeches were reported to Sir Pitt by the most faithful of +wives, and increased the favourable impression which Rebecca made; so +much so that when, on the third day after the funeral, the family party +were at dinner, Sir Pitt Crawley, carving fowls at the head of the +table, actually said to Mrs. Rawdon, "Ahem! Rebecca, may I give you a +wing?"--a speech which made the little woman's eyes sparkle with +pleasure. + +While Rebecca was prosecuting the above schemes and hopes, and Pitt +Crawley arranging the funeral ceremonial and other matters connected +with his future progress and dignity, and Lady Jane busy with her +nursery, as far as her mother would let her, and the sun rising and +setting, and the clock-tower bell of the Hall ringing to dinner and to +prayers as usual, the body of the late owner of Queen's Crawley lay in +the apartment which he had occupied, watched unceasingly by the +professional attendants who were engaged for that rite. A woman or +two, and three or four undertaker's men, the best whom Southampton +could furnish, dressed in black, and of a proper stealthy and tragical +demeanour, had charge of the remains which they watched turn about, +having the housekeeper's room for their place of rendezvous when off +duty, where they played at cards in privacy and drank their beer. + +The members of the family and servants of the house kept away from the +gloomy spot, where the bones of the descendant of an ancient line of +knights and gentlemen lay, awaiting their final consignment to the +family crypt. No regrets attended them, save those of the poor woman +who had hoped to be Sir Pitt's wife and widow and who had fled in +disgrace from the Hall over which she had so nearly been a ruler. +Beyond her and a favourite old pointer he had, and between whom and +himself an attachment subsisted during the period of his imbecility, +the old man had not a single friend to mourn him, having indeed, during +the whole course of his life, never taken the least pains to secure +one. Could the best and kindest of us who depart from the earth have +an opportunity of revisiting it, I suppose he or she (assuming that any +Vanity Fair feelings subsist in the sphere whither we are bound) would +have a pang of mortification at finding how soon our survivors were +consoled. And so Sir Pitt was forgotten--like the kindest and best of +us--only a few weeks sooner. + +Those who will may follow his remains to the grave, whither they were +borne on the appointed day, in the most becoming manner, the family in +black coaches, with their handkerchiefs up to their noses, ready for +the tears which did not come; the undertaker and his gentlemen in deep +tribulation; the select tenantry mourning out of compliment to the new +landlord; the neighbouring gentry's carriages at three miles an hour, +empty, and in profound affliction; the parson speaking out the formula +about "our dear brother departed." As long as we have a man's body, we +play our Vanities upon it, surrounding it with humbug and ceremonies, +laying it in state, and packing it up in gilt nails and velvet; and we +finish our duty by placing over it a stone, written all over with lies. +Bute's curate, a smart young fellow from Oxford, and Sir Pitt Crawley +composed between them an appropriate Latin epitaph for the late +lamented Baronet, and the former preached a classical sermon, exhorting +the survivors not to give way to grief and informing them in the most +respectful terms that they also would be one day called upon to pass +that gloomy and mysterious portal which had just closed upon the +remains of their lamented brother. Then the tenantry mounted on +horseback again, or stayed and refreshed themselves at the Crawley +Arms. Then, after a lunch in the servants' hall at Queen's Crawley, +the gentry's carriages wheeled off to their different destinations: +then the undertaker's men, taking the ropes, palls, velvets, ostrich +feathers, and other mortuary properties, clambered up on the roof of +the hearse and rode off to Southampton. Their faces relapsed into a +natural expression as the horses, clearing the lodge-gates, got into a +brisker trot on the open road; and squads of them might have been seen, +speckling with black the public-house entrances, with pewter-pots +flashing in the sunshine. Sir Pitt's invalid chair was wheeled away +into a tool-house in the garden; the old pointer used to howl sometimes +at first, but these were the only accents of grief which were heard in +the Hall of which Sir Pitt Crawley, Baronet, had been master for some +threescore years. + +As the birds were pretty plentiful, and partridge shooting is as it +were the duty of an English gentleman of statesmanlike propensities, +Sir Pitt Crawley, the first shock of grief over, went out a little and +partook of that diversion in a white hat with crape round it. The sight +of those fields of stubble and turnips, now his own, gave him many +secret joys. Sometimes, and with an exquisite humility, he took no +gun, but went out with a peaceful bamboo cane; Rawdon, his big brother, +and the keepers blazing away at his side. Pitt's money and acres had a +great effect upon his brother. The penniless Colonel became quite +obsequious and respectful to the head of his house, and despised the +milksop Pitt no longer. Rawdon listened with sympathy to his senior's +prospects of planting and draining, gave his advice about the stables +and cattle, rode over to Mudbury to look at a mare, which he thought +would carry Lady Jane, and offered to break her, &c.: the rebellious +dragoon was quite humbled and subdued, and became a most creditable +younger brother. He had constant bulletins from Miss Briggs in London +respecting little Rawdon, who was left behind there, who sent messages +of his own. "I am very well," he wrote. "I hope you are very well. I +hope Mamma is very well. The pony is very well. Grey takes me to ride +in the park. I can canter. I met the little boy who rode before. He +cried when he cantered. I do not cry." Rawdon read these letters to +his brother and Lady Jane, who was delighted with them. The Baronet +promised to take charge of the lad at school, and his kind-hearted wife +gave Rebecca a bank-note, begging her to buy a present with it for her +little nephew. + +One day followed another, and the ladies of the house passed their life +in those calm pursuits and amusements which satisfy country ladies. +Bells rang to meals and to prayers. The young ladies took exercise on +the pianoforte every morning after breakfast, Rebecca giving them the +benefit of her instruction. Then they put on thick shoes and walked in +the park or shrubberies, or beyond the palings into the village, +descending upon the cottages, with Lady Southdown's medicine and tracts +for the sick people there. Lady Southdown drove out in a pony-chaise, +when Rebecca would take her place by the Dowager's side and listen to +her solemn talk with the utmost interest. She sang Handel and Haydn to +the family of evenings, and engaged in a large piece of worsted work, +as if she had been born to the business and as if this kind of life was +to continue with her until she should sink to the grave in a polite old +age, leaving regrets and a great quantity of consols behind her--as if +there were not cares and duns, schemes, shifts, and poverty waiting +outside the park gates, to pounce upon her when she issued into the +world again. + +"It isn't difficult to be a country gentleman's wife," Rebecca thought. +"I think I could be a good woman if I had five thousand a year. I +could dawdle about in the nursery and count the apricots on the wall. +I could water plants in a green-house and pick off dead leaves from the +geraniums. I could ask old women about their rheumatisms and order +half-a-crown's worth of soup for the poor. I shouldn't miss it much, +out of five thousand a year. I could even drive out ten miles to dine +at a neighbour's, and dress in the fashions of the year before last. I +could go to church and keep awake in the great family pew, or go to +sleep behind the curtains, with my veil down, if I only had practice. +I could pay everybody, if I had but the money. This is what the +conjurors here pride themselves upon doing. They look down with pity +upon us miserable sinners who have none. They think themselves +generous if they give our children a five-pound note, and us +contemptible if we are without one." And who knows but Rebecca was +right in her speculations--and that it was only a question of money and +fortune which made the difference between her and an honest woman? If +you take temptations into account, who is to say that he is better than +his neighbour? A comfortable career of prosperity, if it does not make +people honest, at least keeps them so. An alderman coming from a +turtle feast will not step out of his carriage to steal a leg of mutton; +but put him to starve, and see if he will not purloin a loaf. Becky +consoled herself by so balancing the chances and equalizing the +distribution of good and evil in the world. + +The old haunts, the old fields and woods, the copses, ponds, and +gardens, the rooms of the old house where she had spent a couple of +years seven years ago, were all carefully revisited by her. She had +been young there, or comparatively so, for she forgot the time when she +ever WAS young--but she remembered her thoughts and feelings seven +years back and contrasted them with those which she had at present, now +that she had seen the world, and lived with great people, and raised +herself far beyond her original humble station. + +"I have passed beyond it, because I have brains," Becky thought, "and +almost all the rest of the world are fools. I could not go back and +consort with those people now, whom I used to meet in my father's +studio. Lords come up to my door with stars and garters, instead of +poor artists with screws of tobacco in their pockets. I have a +gentleman for my husband, and an Earl's daughter for my sister, in the +very house where I was little better than a servant a few years ago. +But am I much better to do now in the world than I was when I was the +poor painter's daughter and wheedled the grocer round the corner for +sugar and tea? Suppose I had married Francis who was so fond of me--I +couldn't have been much poorer than I am now. Heigho! I wish I could +exchange my position in society, and all my relations for a snug sum in +the Three Per Cent. Consols"; for so it was that Becky felt the Vanity +of human affairs, and it was in those securities that she would have +liked to cast anchor. + +It may, perhaps, have struck her that to have been honest and humble, +to have done her duty, and to have marched straightforward on her way, +would have brought her as near happiness as that path by which she was +striving to attain it. But--just as the children at Queen's Crawley +went round the room where the body of their father lay--if ever Becky +had these thoughts, she was accustomed to walk round them and not look +in. She eluded them and despised them--or at least she was committed +to the other path from which retreat was now impossible. And for my +part I believe that remorse is the least active of all a man's moral +senses--the very easiest to be deadened when wakened, and in some never +wakened at all. We grieve at being found out and at the idea of shame +or punishment, but the mere sense of wrong makes very few people +unhappy in Vanity Fair. + +So Rebecca, during her stay at Queen's Crawley, made as many friends of +the Mammon of Unrighteousness as she could possibly bring under +control. Lady Jane and her husband bade her farewell with the warmest +demonstrations of good-will. They looked forward with pleasure to the +time when, the family house in Gaunt Street being repaired and +beautified, they were to meet again in London. Lady Southdown made her +up a packet of medicine and sent a letter by her to the Rev. Lawrence +Grills, exhorting that gentleman to save the brand who "honoured" the +letter from the burning. Pitt accompanied them with four horses in the +carriage to Mudbury, having sent on their baggage in a cart previously, +accompanied with loads of game. + +"How happy you will be to see your darling little boy again!" Lady +Crawley said, taking leave of her kinswoman. + +"Oh so happy!" said Rebecca, throwing up the green eyes. She was +immensely happy to be free of the place, and yet loath to go. Queen's +Crawley was abominably stupid, and yet the air there was somehow purer +than that which she had been accustomed to breathe. Everybody had been +dull, but had been kind in their way. "It is all the influence of a +long course of Three Per Cents," Becky said to herself, and was right +very likely. + +However, the London lamps flashed joyfully as the stage rolled into +Piccadilly, and Briggs had made a beautiful fire in Curzon Street, and +little Rawdon was up to welcome back his papa and mamma. + + + +CHAPTER XLII + +Which Treats of the Osborne Family + +Considerable time has elapsed since we have seen our respectable +friend, old Mr. Osborne of Russell Square. He has not been the +happiest of mortals since last we met him. Events have occurred which +have not improved his temper, and in more instances than one he has +not been allowed to have his own way. To be thwarted in this +reasonable desire was always very injurious to the old gentleman; and +resistance became doubly exasperating when gout, age, loneliness, and +the force of many disappointments combined to weigh him down. His +stiff black hair began to grow quite white soon after his son's death; +his face grew redder; his hands trembled more and more as he poured out +his glass of port wine. He led his clerks a dire life in the City: +his family at home were not much happier. I doubt if Rebecca, whom we +have seen piously praying for Consols, would have exchanged her poverty +and the dare-devil excitement and chances of her life for Osborne's +money and the humdrum gloom which enveloped him. He had proposed for +Miss Swartz, but had been rejected scornfully by the partisans of that +lady, who married her to a young sprig of Scotch nobility. He was a +man to have married a woman out of low life and bullied her dreadfully +afterwards; but no person presented herself suitable to his taste, and, +instead, he tyrannized over his unmarried daughter, at home. She had a +fine carriage and fine horses and sat at the head of a table loaded +with the grandest plate. She had a cheque-book, a prize footman to +follow her when she walked, unlimited credit, and bows and compliments +from all the tradesmen, and all the appurtenances of an heiress; but +she spent a woeful time. The little charity-girls at the Foundling, the +sweeperess at the crossing, the poorest under-kitchen-maid in the +servants' hall, was happy compared to that unfortunate and now +middle-aged young lady. + +Frederick Bullock, Esq., of the house of Bullock, Hulker, and Bullock, +had married Maria Osborne, not without a great deal of difficulty and +grumbling on Mr. Bullock's part. George being dead and cut out of his +father's will, Frederick insisted that the half of the old gentleman's +property should be settled upon his Maria, and indeed, for a long time, +refused, "to come to the scratch" (it was Mr. Frederick's own +expression) on any other terms. Osborne said Fred had agreed to take +his daughter with twenty thousand, and he should bind himself to no +more. "Fred might take it, and welcome, or leave it, and go and be +hanged." Fred, whose hopes had been raised when George had been +disinherited, thought himself infamously swindled by the old merchant, +and for some time made as if he would break off the match altogether. +Osborne withdrew his account from Bullock and Hulker's, went on 'Change +with a horsewhip which he swore he would lay across the back of a +certain scoundrel that should be nameless, and demeaned himself in his +usual violent manner. Jane Osborne condoled with her sister Maria +during this family feud. "I always told you, Maria, that it was your +money he loved and not you," she said, soothingly. + +"He selected me and my money at any rate; he didn't choose you and +yours," replied Maria, tossing up her head. + +The rapture was, however, only temporary. Fred's father and senior +partners counselled him to take Maria, even with the twenty thousand +settled, half down, and half at the death of Mr. Osborne, with the +chances of the further division of the property. So he "knuckled +down," again to use his own phrase, and sent old Hulker with peaceable +overtures to Osborne. It was his father, he said, who would not hear +of the match, and had made the difficulties; he was most anxious to +keep the engagement. The excuse was sulkily accepted by Mr. Osborne. +Hulker and Bullock were a high family of the City aristocracy, and +connected with the "nobs" at the West End. It was something for the old +man to be able to say, "My son, sir, of the house of Hulker, Bullock, +and Co., sir; my daughter's cousin, Lady Mary Mango, sir, daughter of +the Right Hon. The Earl of Castlemouldy." In his imagination he saw +his house peopled by the "nobs." So he forgave young Bullock and +consented that the marriage should take place. + +It was a grand affair--the bridegroom's relatives giving the breakfast, +their habitations being near St. George's, Hanover Square, where the +business took place. The "nobs of the West End" were invited, and many +of them signed the book. Mr. Mango and Lady Mary Mango were there, +with the dear young Gwendoline and Guinever Mango as bridesmaids; +Colonel Bludyer of the Dragoon Guards (eldest son of the house of +Bludyer Brothers, Mincing Lane), another cousin of the bridegroom, and +the Honourable Mrs. Bludyer; the Honourable George Boulter, Lord +Levant's son, and his lady, Miss Mango that was; Lord Viscount +Castletoddy; Honourable James McMull and Mrs. McMull (formerly Miss +Swartz); and a host of fashionables, who have all married into Lombard +Street and done a great deal to ennoble Cornhill. + +The young couple had a house near Berkeley Square and a small villa at +Roehampton, among the banking colony there. Fred was considered to +have made rather a mesalliance by the ladies of his family, whose +grandfather had been in a Charity School, and who were allied through +the husbands with some of the best blood in England. And Maria was +bound, by superior pride and great care in the composition of her +visiting-book, to make up for the defects of birth, and felt it her +duty to see her father and sister as little as possible. + +That she should utterly break with the old man, who had still so many +scores of thousand pounds to give away, is absurd to suppose. Fred +Bullock would never allow her to do that. But she was still young and +incapable of hiding her feelings; and by inviting her papa and sister +to her third-rate parties, and behaving very coldly to them when they +came, and by avoiding Russell Square, and indiscreetly begging her +father to quit that odious vulgar place, she did more harm than all +Frederick's diplomacy could repair, and perilled her chance of her +inheritance like a giddy heedless creature as she was. + +"So Russell Square is not good enough for Mrs. Maria, hay?" said the +old gentleman, rattling up the carriage windows as he and his daughter +drove away one night from Mrs. Frederick Bullock's, after dinner. "So +she invites her father and sister to a second day's dinner (if those +sides, or ontrys, as she calls 'em, weren't served yesterday, I'm +d--d), and to meet City folks and littery men, and keeps the Earls and +the Ladies, and the Honourables to herself. Honourables? Damn +Honourables. I am a plain British merchant I am, and could buy the +beggarly hounds over and over. Lords, indeed!--why, at one of her +swarreys I saw one of 'em speak to a dam fiddler--a fellar I despise. +And they won't come to Russell Square, won't they? Why, I'll lay my +life I've got a better glass of wine, and pay a better figure for it, +and can show a handsomer service of silver, and can lay a better dinner +on my mahogany, than ever they see on theirs--the cringing, sneaking, +stuck-up fools. Drive on quick, James: I want to get back to Russell +Square--ha, ha!" and he sank back into the corner with a furious laugh. +With such reflections on his own superior merit, it was the custom of +the old gentleman not unfrequently to console himself. + +Jane Osborne could not but concur in these opinions respecting her +sister's conduct; and when Mrs. Frederick's first-born, Frederick +Augustus Howard Stanley Devereux Bullock, was born, old Osborne, who +was invited to the christening and to be godfather, contented himself +with sending the child a gold cup, with twenty guineas inside it for +the nurse. "That's more than any of your Lords will give, I'LL +warrant," he said and refused to attend at the ceremony. + +The splendour of the gift, however, caused great satisfaction to the +house of Bullock. Maria thought that her father was very much pleased +with her, and Frederick augured the best for his little son and heir. + +One can fancy the pangs with which Miss Osborne in her solitude in +Russell Square read the Morning Post, where her sister's name occurred +every now and then, in the articles headed "Fashionable Reunions," and +where she had an opportunity of reading a description of Mrs. F. +Bullock's costume, when presented at the drawing room by Lady Frederica +Bullock. Jane's own life, as we have said, admitted of no such +grandeur. It was an awful existence. She had to get up of black +winter's mornings to make breakfast for her scowling old father, who +would have turned the whole house out of doors if his tea had not been +ready at half-past eight. She remained silent opposite to him, +listening to the urn hissing, and sitting in tremor while the parent +read his paper and consumed his accustomed portion of muffins and tea. +At half-past nine he rose and went to the City, and she was almost free +till dinner-time, to make visitations in the kitchen and to scold the +servants; to drive abroad and descend upon the tradesmen, who were +prodigiously respectful; to leave her cards and her papa's at the great +glum respectable houses of their City friends; or to sit alone in the +large drawing-room, expecting visitors; and working at a huge piece of +worsted by the fire, on the sofa, hard by the great Iphigenia clock, +which ticked and tolled with mournful loudness in the dreary room. The +great glass over the mantelpiece, faced by the other great console +glass at the opposite end of the room, increased and multiplied between +them the brown Holland bag in which the chandelier hung, until you saw +these brown Holland bags fading away in endless perspectives, and this +apartment of Miss Osborne's seemed the centre of a system of +drawing-rooms. When she removed the cordovan leather from the grand +piano and ventured to play a few notes on it, it sounded with a +mournful sadness, startling the dismal echoes of the house. George's +picture was gone, and laid upstairs in a lumber-room in the garret; and +though there was a consciousness of him, and father and daughter often +instinctively knew that they were thinking of him, no mention was ever +made of the brave and once darling son. + +At five o'clock Mr. Osborne came back to his dinner, which he and his +daughter took in silence (seldom broken, except when he swore and was +savage, if the cooking was not to his liking), or which they shared +twice in a month with a party of dismal friends of Osborne's rank and +age. Old Dr. Gulp and his lady from Bloomsbury Square; old Mr. +Frowser, the attorney, from Bedford Row, a very great man, and from his +business, hand-in-glove with the "nobs at the West End"; old Colonel +Livermore, of the Bombay Army, and Mrs. Livermore, from Upper Bedford +Place; old Sergeant Toffy and Mrs. Toffy; and sometimes old Sir Thomas +Coffin and Lady Coffin, from Bedford Square. Sir Thomas was celebrated +as a hanging judge, and the particular tawny port was produced when he +dined with Mr. Osborne. + +These people and their like gave the pompous Russell Square merchant +pompous dinners back again. They had solemn rubbers of whist, when +they went upstairs after drinking, and their carriages were called at +half past ten. Many rich people, whom we poor devils are in the habit +of envying, lead contentedly an existence like that above described. +Jane Osborne scarcely ever met a man under sixty, and almost the only +bachelor who appeared in their society was Mr. Smirk, the celebrated +ladies' doctor. + +I can't say that nothing had occurred to disturb the monotony of this +awful existence: the fact is, there had been a secret in poor Jane's +life which had made her father more savage and morose than even nature, +pride, and over-feeding had made him. This secret was connected with +Miss Wirt, who had a cousin an artist, Mr. Smee, very celebrated since +as a portrait-painter and R.A., but who once was glad enough to give +drawing lessons to ladies of fashion. Mr. Smee has forgotten where +Russell Square is now, but he was glad enough to visit it in the year +1818, when Miss Osborne had instruction from him. + +Smee (formerly a pupil of Sharpe of Frith Street, a dissolute, +irregular, and unsuccessful man, but a man with great knowledge of his +art) being the cousin of Miss Wirt, we say, and introduced by her to +Miss Osborne, whose hand and heart were still free after various +incomplete love affairs, felt a great attachment for this lady, and it +is believed inspired one in her bosom. Miss Wirt was the confidante of +this intrigue. I know not whether she used to leave the room where the +master and his pupil were painting, in order to give them an +opportunity for exchanging those vows and sentiments which cannot be +uttered advantageously in the presence of a third party; I know not +whether she hoped that should her cousin succeed in carrying off the +rich merchant's daughter, he would give Miss Wirt a portion of the +wealth which she had enabled him to win--all that is certain is that +Mr. Osborne got some hint of the transaction, came back from the City +abruptly, and entered the drawing-room with his bamboo cane; found the +painter, the pupil, and the companion all looking exceedingly pale +there; turned the former out of doors with menaces that he would break +every bone in his skin, and half an hour afterwards dismissed Miss Wirt +likewise, kicking her trunks down the stairs, trampling on her +bandboxes, and shaking his fist at her hackney coach as it bore her +away. + +Jane Osborne kept her bedroom for many days. She was not allowed to +have a companion afterwards. Her father swore to her that she should +not have a shilling of his money if she made any match without his +concurrence; and as he wanted a woman to keep his house, he did not +choose that she should marry, so that she was obliged to give up all +projects with which Cupid had any share. During her papa's life, then, +she resigned herself to the manner of existence here described, and was +content to be an old maid. Her sister, meanwhile, was having children +with finer names every year and the intercourse between the two grew +fainter continually. "Jane and I do not move in the same sphere of +life," Mrs. Bullock said. "I regard her as a sister, of course"--which +means--what does it mean when a lady says that she regards Jane as a +sister? + +It has been described how the Misses Dobbin lived with their father at +a fine villa at Denmark Hill, where there were beautiful graperies and +peach-trees which delighted little Georgy Osborne. The Misses Dobbin, +who drove often to Brompton to see our dear Amelia, came sometimes to +Russell Square too, to pay a visit to their old acquaintance Miss +Osborne. I believe it was in consequence of the commands of their +brother the Major in India (for whom their papa had a prodigious +respect), that they paid attention to Mrs. George; for the Major, the +godfather and guardian of Amelia's little boy, still hoped that the +child's grandfather might be induced to relent towards him and +acknowledge him for the sake of his son. The Misses Dobbin kept Miss +Osborne acquainted with the state of Amelia's affairs; how she was +living with her father and mother; how poor they were; how they +wondered what men, and such men as their brother and dear Captain +Osborne, could find in such an insignificant little chit; how she was +still, as heretofore, a namby-pamby milk-and-water affected +creature--but how the boy was really the noblest little boy ever +seen--for the hearts of all women warm towards young children, and the +sourest spinster is kind to them. + +One day, after great entreaties on the part of the Misses Dobbin, +Amelia allowed little George to go and pass a day with them at Denmark +Hill--a part of which day she spent herself in writing to the Major in +India. She congratulated him on the happy news which his sisters had +just conveyed to her. She prayed for his prosperity and that of the +bride he had chosen. She thanked him for a thousand thousand kind +offices and proofs of steadfast friendship to her in her affliction. +She told him the last news about little Georgy, and how he was gone to +spend that very day with his sisters in the country. She underlined +the letter a great deal, and she signed herself affectionately his +friend, Amelia Osborne. She forgot to send any message of kindness to +Lady O'Dowd, as her wont was--and did not mention Glorvina by name, and +only in italics, as the Major's BRIDE, for whom she begged blessings. +But the news of the marriage removed the reserve which she had kept up +towards him. She was glad to be able to own and feel how warmly and +gratefully she regarded him--and as for the idea of being jealous of +Glorvina (Glorvina, indeed!), Amelia would have scouted it, if an angel +from heaven had hinted it to her. That night, when Georgy came back in +the pony-carriage in which he rejoiced, and in which he was driven by +Sir Wm. Dobbin's old coachman, he had round his neck a fine gold chain +and watch. He said an old lady, not pretty, had given it him, who +cried and kissed him a great deal. But he didn't like her. He liked +grapes very much. And he only liked his mamma. Amelia shrank and +started; the timid soul felt a presentiment of terror when she heard +that the relations of the child's father had seen him. + +Miss Osborne came back to give her father his dinner. He had made a +good speculation in the City, and was rather in a good humour that day, +and chanced to remark the agitation under which she laboured. "What's +the matter, Miss Osborne?" he deigned to say. + +The woman burst into tears. "Oh, sir," she said, "I've seen little +George. He is as beautiful as an angel--and so like him!" The old man +opposite to her did not say a word, but flushed up and began to tremble +in every limb. + + + +CHAPTER XLIII + +In Which the Reader Has to Double the Cape + +The astonished reader must be called upon to transport himself ten +thousand miles to the military station of Bundlegunge, in the Madras +division of our Indian empire, where our gallant old friends of the +--th regiment are quartered under the command of the brave Colonel, Sir +Michael O'Dowd. Time has dealt kindly with that stout officer, as it +does ordinarily with men who have good stomachs and good tempers and +are not perplexed over much by fatigue of the brain. The Colonel plays +a good knife and fork at tiffin and resumes those weapons with great +success at dinner. He smokes his hookah after both meals and puffs as +quietly while his wife scolds him as he did under the fire of the +French at Waterloo. Age and heat have not diminished the activity or +the eloquence of the descendant of the Malonys and the Molloys. Her +Ladyship, our old acquaintance, is as much at home at Madras as at +Brussels in the cantonment as under the tents. On the march you saw +her at the head of the regiment seated on a royal elephant, a noble +sight. Mounted on that beast, she has been into action with tigers in +the jungle, she has been received by native princes, who have welcomed +her and Glorvina into the recesses of their zenanas and offered her +shawls and jewels which it went to her heart to refuse. The sentries +of all arms salute her wherever she makes her appearance, and she +touches her hat gravely to their salutation. Lady O'Dowd is one of the +greatest ladies in the Presidency of Madras--her quarrel with Lady +Smith, wife of Sir Minos Smith the puisne judge, is still remembered by +some at Madras, when the Colonel's lady snapped her fingers in the +Judge's lady's face and said SHE'D never walk behind ever a beggarly +civilian. Even now, though it is five-and-twenty years ago, people +remember Lady O'Dowd performing a jig at Government House, where she +danced down two Aides-de-Camp, a Major of Madras cavalry, and two +gentlemen of the Civil Service; and, persuaded by Major Dobbin, C.B., +second in command of the --th, to retire to the supper-room, lassata +nondum satiata recessit. + +Peggy O'Dowd is indeed the same as ever, kind in act and thought; +impetuous in temper; eager to command; a tyrant over her Michael; a +dragon amongst all the ladies of the regiment; a mother to all the +young men, whom she tends in their sickness, defends in all their +scrapes, and with whom Lady Peggy is immensely popular. But the +Subalterns' and Captains' ladies (the Major is unmarried) cabal against +her a good deal. They say that Glorvina gives herself airs and that +Peggy herself is intolerably domineering. She interfered with a +little congregation which Mrs. Kirk had got up and laughed the young +men away from her sermons, stating that a soldier's wife had no +business to be a parson--that Mrs. Kirk would be much better mending +her husband's clothes; and, if the regiment wanted sermons, that she +had the finest in the world, those of her uncle, the Dean. She abruptly +put a termination to a flirtation which Lieutenant Stubble of the +regiment had commenced with the Surgeon's wife, threatening to come +down upon Stubble for the money which he had borrowed from her (for the +young fellow was still of an extravagant turn) unless he broke off at +once and went to the Cape on sick leave. On the other hand, she housed +and sheltered Mrs. Posky, who fled from her bungalow one night, pursued +by her infuriate husband, wielding his second brandy bottle, and +actually carried Posky through the delirium tremens and broke him of +the habit of drinking, which had grown upon that officer, as all evil +habits will grow upon men. In a word, in adversity she was the best of +comforters, in good fortune the most troublesome of friends, having a +perfectly good opinion of herself always and an indomitable resolution +to have her own way. + +Among other points, she had made up her mind that Glorvina should marry +our old friend Dobbin. Mrs. O'Dowd knew the Major's expectations and +appreciated his good qualities and the high character which he enjoyed +in his profession. Glorvina, a very handsome, fresh-coloured, +black-haired, blue-eyed young lady, who could ride a horse, or play a +sonata with any girl out of the County Cork, seemed to be the very +person destined to insure Dobbin's happiness--much more than that poor +good little weak-spur'ted Amelia, about whom he used to take on +so.--"Look at Glorvina enter a room," Mrs. O'Dowd would say, "and +compare her with that poor Mrs. Osborne, who couldn't say boo to a +goose. She'd be worthy of you, Major--you're a quiet man yourself, and +want some one to talk for ye. And though she does not come of such +good blood as the Malonys or Molloys, let me tell ye, she's of an +ancient family that any nobleman might be proud to marry into." + +But before she had come to such a resolution and determined to +subjugate Major Dobbin by her endearments, it must be owned that +Glorvina had practised them a good deal elsewhere. She had had a +season in Dublin, and who knows how many in Cork, Killarney, and +Mallow? She had flirted with all the marriageable officers whom the +depots of her country afforded, and all the bachelor squires who seemed +eligible. She had been engaged to be married a half-score times in +Ireland, besides the clergyman at Bath who used her so ill. She had +flirted all the way to Madras with the Captain and chief mate of the +Ramchunder East Indiaman, and had a season at the Presidency with her +brother and Mrs. O'Dowd, who was staying there, while the Major of the +regiment was in command at the station. Everybody admired her there; +everybody danced with her; but no one proposed who was worth the +marrying--one or two exceedingly young subalterns sighed after her, and +a beardless civilian or two, but she rejected these as beneath her +pretensions--and other and younger virgins than Glorvina were married +before her. There are women, and handsome women too, who have this +fortune in life. They fall in love with the utmost generosity; they +ride and walk with half the Army-list, though they draw near to forty, +and yet the Misses O'Grady are the Misses O'Grady still: Glorvina +persisted that but for Lady O'Dowd's unlucky quarrel with the Judge's +lady, she would have made a good match at Madras, where old Mr. +Chutney, who was at the head of the civil service (and who afterwards +married Miss Dolby, a young lady only thirteen years of age who had +just arrived from school in Europe), was just at the point of proposing +to her. + +Well, although Lady O'Dowd and Glorvina quarrelled a great number of +times every day, and upon almost every conceivable subject--indeed, if +Mick O'Dowd had not possessed the temper of an angel two such women +constantly about his ears would have driven him out of his senses--yet +they agreed between themselves on this point, that Glorvina should +marry Major Dobbin, and were determined that the Major should have no +rest until the arrangement was brought about. Undismayed by forty or +fifty previous defeats, Glorvina laid siege to him. She sang Irish +melodies at him unceasingly. She asked him so frequently and +pathetically, Will ye come to the bower? that it is a wonder how any +man of feeling could have resisted the invitation. She was never tired +of inquiring, if Sorrow had his young days faded, and was ready to +listen and weep like Desdemona at the stories of his dangers and his +campaigns. It has been said that our honest and dear old friend used +to perform on the flute in private; Glorvina insisted upon having duets +with him, and Lady O'Dowd would rise and artlessly quit the room when +the young couple were so engaged. Glorvina forced the Major to ride +with her of mornings. The whole cantonment saw them set out and +return. She was constantly writing notes over to him at his house, +borrowing his books, and scoring with her great pencil-marks such +passages of sentiment or humour as awakened her sympathy. She borrowed +his horses, his servants, his spoons, and palanquin--no wonder that +public rumour assigned her to him, and that the Major's sisters in +England should fancy they were about to have a sister-in-law. + +Dobbin, who was thus vigorously besieged, was in the meanwhile in a +state of the most odious tranquillity. He used to laugh when the young +fellows of the regiment joked him about Glorvina's manifest attentions +to him. "Bah!" said he, "she is only keeping her hand in--she +practises upon me as she does upon Mrs. Tozer's piano, because it's the +most handy instrument in the station. I am much too battered and old +for such a fine young lady as Glorvina." And so he went on riding with +her, and copying music and verses into her albums, and playing at chess +with her very submissively; for it is with these simple amusements that +some officers in India are accustomed to while away their leisure +moments, while others of a less domestic turn hunt hogs, and shoot +snipes, or gamble and smoke cheroots, and betake themselves to +brandy-and-water. As for Sir Michael O'Dowd, though his lady and her +sister both urged him to call upon the Major to explain himself and not +keep on torturing a poor innocent girl in that shameful way, the old +soldier refused point-blank to have anything to do with the conspiracy. +"Faith, the Major's big enough to choose for himself," Sir Michael +said; "he'll ask ye when he wants ye"; or else he would turn the matter +off jocularly, declaring that "Dobbin was too young to keep house, and +had written home to ask lave of his mamma." Nay, he went farther, and +in private communications with his Major would caution and rally him, +crying, "Mind your oi, Dob, my boy, them girls is bent on mischief--me +Lady has just got a box of gowns from Europe, and there's a pink satin +for Glorvina, which will finish ye, Dob, if it's in the power of woman +or satin to move ye." + +But the truth is, neither beauty nor fashion could conquer him. Our +honest friend had but one idea of a woman in his head, and that one did +not in the least resemble Miss Glorvina O'Dowd in pink satin. A gentle +little woman in black, with large eyes and brown hair, seldom speaking, +save when spoken to, and then in a voice not the least resembling Miss +Glorvina's--a soft young mother tending an infant and beckoning the +Major up with a smile to look at him--a rosy-cheeked lass coming +singing into the room in Russell Square or hanging on George Osborne's +arm, happy and loving--there was but this image that filled our honest +Major's mind, by day and by night, and reigned over it always. Very +likely Amelia was not like the portrait the Major had formed of her: +there was a figure in a book of fashions which his sisters had in +England, and with which William had made away privately, pasting it +into the lid of his desk, and fancying he saw some resemblance to Mrs. +Osborne in the print, whereas I have seen it, and can vouch that it is +but the picture of a high-waisted gown with an impossible doll's face +simpering over it--and, perhaps, Mr. Dobbin's sentimental Amelia was no +more like the real one than this absurd little print which he +cherished. But what man in love, of us, is better informed?--or is he +much happier when he sees and owns his delusion? Dobbin was under this +spell. He did not bother his friends and the public much about his +feelings, or indeed lose his natural rest or appetite on account of +them. His head has grizzled since we saw him last, and a line or two +of silver may be seen in the soft brown hair likewise. But his +feelings are not in the least changed or oldened, and his love remains +as fresh as a man's recollections of boyhood are. + +We have said how the two Misses Dobbin and Amelia, the Major's +correspondents in Europe, wrote him letters from England, Mrs. Osborne +congratulating him with great candour and cordiality upon his +approaching nuptials with Miss O'Dowd. "Your sister has just kindly +visited me," Amelia wrote in her letter, "and informed me of an +INTERESTING EVENT, upon which I beg to offer my MOST SINCERE +CONGRATULATIONS. I hope the young lady to whom I hear you are to be +UNITED will in every respect prove worthy of one who is himself all +kindness and goodness. The poor widow has only her prayers to offer +and her cordial cordial wishes for YOUR PROSPERITY! Georgy sends his +love to HIS DEAR GODPAPA and hopes that you will not forget him. I tell +him that you are about to form OTHER TIES, with one who I am sure +merits ALL YOUR AFFECTION, but that, although such ties must of course +be the strongest and most sacred, and supersede ALL OTHERS, yet that I +am sure the widow and the child whom you have ever protected and loved +will always HAVE A CORNER IN YOUR HEART." The letter, which has been +before alluded to, went on in this strain, protesting throughout as to +the extreme satisfaction of the writer. + +This letter, which arrived by the very same ship which brought out +Lady O'Dowd's box of millinery from London (and which you may be sure +Dobbin opened before any one of the other packets which the mail +brought him), put the receiver into such a state of mind that Glorvina, +and her pink satin, and everything belonging to her became perfectly +odious to him. The Major cursed the talk of women, and the sex in +general. Everything annoyed him that day--the parade was insufferably +hot and wearisome. Good heavens! was a man of intellect to waste his +life, day after day, inspecting cross-belts and putting fools through +their manoeuvres? The senseless chatter of the young men at mess was +more than ever jarring. What cared he, a man on the high road to forty, +to know how many snipes Lieutenant Smith had shot, or what were the +performances of Ensign Brown's mare? The jokes about the table filled +him with shame. He was too old to listen to the banter of the +assistant surgeon and the slang of the youngsters, at which old O'Dowd, +with his bald head and red face, laughed quite easily. The old man had +listened to those jokes any time these thirty years--Dobbin himself had +been fifteen years hearing them. And after the boisterous dulness of +the mess-table, the quarrels and scandal of the ladies of the regiment! +It was unbearable, shameful. "O Amelia, Amelia," he thought, "you to +whom I have been so faithful--you reproach me! It is because you +cannot feel for me that I drag on this wearisome life. And you reward +me after years of devotion by giving me your blessing upon my marriage, +forsooth, with this flaunting Irish girl!" Sick and sorry felt poor +William; more than ever wretched and lonely. He would like to have +done with life and its vanity altogether--so bootless and +unsatisfactory the struggle, so cheerless and dreary the prospect +seemed to him. He lay all that night sleepless, and yearning to go +home. Amelia's letter had fallen as a blank upon him. No fidelity, no +constant truth and passion, could move her into warmth. She would not +see that he loved her. Tossing in his bed, he spoke out to her. "Good +God, Amelia!" he said, "don't you know that I only love you in the +world--you, who are a stone to me--you, whom I tended through months +and months of illness and grief, and who bade me farewell with a smile +on your face, and forgot me before the door shut between us!" The +native servants lying outside his verandas beheld with wonder the +Major, so cold and quiet ordinarily, at present so passionately moved +and cast down. Would she have pitied him had she seen him? He read +over and over all the letters which he ever had from her--letters of +business relative to the little property which he had made her believe +her husband had left to her--brief notes of invitation--every scrap of +writing that she had ever sent to him--how cold, how kind, how +hopeless, how selfish they were! + +Had there been some kind gentle soul near at hand who could read and +appreciate this silent generous heart, who knows but that the reign of +Amelia might have been over, and that friend William's love might have +flowed into a kinder channel? But there was only Glorvina of the jetty +ringlets with whom his intercourse was familiar, and this dashing young +woman was not bent upon loving the Major, but rather on making the +Major admire HER--a most vain and hopeless task, too, at least +considering the means that the poor girl possessed to carry it out. +She curled her hair and showed her shoulders at him, as much as to say, +did ye ever see such jet ringlets and such a complexion? She grinned at +him so that he might see that every tooth in her head was sound--and he +never heeded all these charms. Very soon after the arrival of the box +of millinery, and perhaps indeed in honour of it, Lady O'Dowd and the +ladies of the King's Regiment gave a ball to the Company's Regiments +and the civilians at the station. Glorvina sported the killing pink +frock, and the Major, who attended the party and walked very ruefully +up and down the rooms, never so much as perceived the pink garment. +Glorvina danced past him in a fury with all the young subalterns of the +station, and the Major was not in the least jealous of her performance, +or angry because Captain Bangles of the Cavalry handed her to supper. +It was not jealousy, or frocks, or shoulders that could move him, and +Glorvina had nothing more. + +So these two were each exemplifying the Vanity of this life, and each +longing for what he or she could not get. Glorvina cried with rage at +the failure. She had set her mind on the Major "more than on any of +the others," she owned, sobbing. "He'll break my heart, he will, +Peggy," she would whimper to her sister-in-law when they were good +friends; "sure every one of me frocks must be taken in--it's such a +skeleton I'm growing." Fat or thin, laughing or melancholy, on +horseback or the music-stool, it was all the same to the Major. And +the Colonel, puffing his pipe and listening to these complaints, would +suggest that Glory should have some black frocks out in the next box +from London, and told a mysterious story of a lady in Ireland who died +of grief for the loss of her husband before she got ere a one. + +While the Major was going on in this tantalizing way, not proposing, +and declining to fall in love, there came another ship from Europe +bringing letters on board, and amongst them some more for the heartless +man. These were home letters bearing an earlier postmark than that of +the former packets, and as Major Dobbin recognized among his the +handwriting of his sister, who always crossed and recrossed her letters +to her brother--gathered together all the possible bad news which she +could collect, abused him and read him lectures with sisterly +frankness, and always left him miserable for the day after "dearest +William" had achieved the perusal of one of her epistles--the truth +must be told that dearest William did not hurry himself to break the +seal of Miss Dobbin's letter, but waited for a particularly favourable +day and mood for doing so. A fortnight before, moreover, he had +written to scold her for telling those absurd stories to Mrs. Osborne, +and had despatched a letter in reply to that lady, undeceiving her with +respect to the reports concerning him and assuring her that "he had no +sort of present intention of altering his condition." + +Two or three nights after the arrival of the second package of letters, +the Major had passed the evening pretty cheerfully at Lady O'Dowd's +house, where Glorvina thought that he listened with rather more +attention than usual to the Meeting of the Wathers, the Minsthrel Boy, +and one or two other specimens of song with which she favoured him (the +truth is, he was no more listening to Glorvina than to the howling of +the jackals in the moonlight outside, and the delusion was hers as +usual), and having played his game at chess with her (cribbage with the +surgeon was Lady O'Dowd's favourite evening pastime), Major Dobbin took +leave of the Colonel's family at his usual hour and retired to his own +house. + +There on his table, his sister's letter lay reproaching him. He took +it up, ashamed rather of his negligence regarding it, and prepared +himself for a disagreeable hour's communing with that crabbed-handed +absent relative. . . . It may have been an hour after the Major's +departure from the Colonel's house--Sir Michael was sleeping the sleep +of the just; Glorvina had arranged her black ringlets in the +innumerable little bits of paper, in which it was her habit to confine +them; Lady O'Dowd, too, had gone to her bed in the nuptial chamber, on +the ground-floor, and had tucked her musquito curtains round her fair +form, when the guard at the gates of the Commanding-Officer's compound +beheld Major Dobbin, in the moonlight, rushing towards the house with a +swift step and a very agitated countenance, and he passed the sentinel +and went up to the windows of the Colonel's bedchamber. + +"O'Dowd--Colonel!" said Dobbin and kept up a great shouting. + +"Heavens, Meejor!" said Glorvina of the curl-papers, putting out her +head too, from her window. + +"What is it, Dob, me boy?" said the Colonel, expecting there was a fire +in the station, or that the route had come from headquarters. + +"I--I must have leave of absence. I must go to England--on the most +urgent private affairs," Dobbin said. + +"Good heavens, what has happened!" thought Glorvina, trembling with all +the papillotes. + +"I want to be off--now--to-night," Dobbin continued; and the Colonel +getting up, came out to parley with him. + +In the postscript of Miss Dobbin's cross-letter, the Major had just +come upon a paragraph, to the following effect:--"I drove yesterday to +see your old ACQUAINTANCE, Mrs. Osborne. The wretched place they live +at, since they were bankrupts, you know--Mr. S., to judge from a BRASS +PLATE on the door of his hut (it is little better) is a coal-merchant. +The little boy, your godson, is certainly a fine child, though forward, +and inclined to be saucy and self-willed. But we have taken notice of +him as you wish it, and have introduced him to his aunt, Miss O., who +was rather pleased with him. Perhaps his grandpapa, not the bankrupt +one, who is almost doting, but Mr. Osborne, of Russell Square, may be +induced to relent towards the child of your friend, HIS ERRING AND +SELF-WILLED SON. And Amelia will not be ill-disposed to give him up. +The widow is CONSOLED, and is about to marry a reverend gentleman, the +Rev. Mr. Binny, one of the curates of Brompton. A poor match. But +Mrs. O. is getting old, and I saw a great deal of grey in her hair--she +was in very good spirits: and your little godson overate himself at +our house. Mamma sends her love with that of your affectionate, Ann +Dobbin." + + + +CHAPTER XLIV + +A Round-about Chapter between London and Hampshire + +Our old friends the Crawleys' family house, in Great Gaunt Street, +still bore over its front the hatchment which had been placed there as +a token of mourning for Sir Pitt Crawley's demise, yet this heraldic +emblem was in itself a very splendid and gaudy piece of furniture, and +all the rest of the mansion became more brilliant than it had ever been +during the late baronet's reign. The black outer-coating of the bricks +was removed, and they appeared with a cheerful, blushing face streaked +with white: the old bronze lions of the knocker were gilt handsomely, +the railings painted, and the dismallest house in Great Gaunt Street +became the smartest in the whole quarter, before the green leaves in +Hampshire had replaced those yellowing ones which were on the trees in +Queen's Crawley Avenue when old Sir Pitt Crawley passed under them for +the last time. + +A little woman, with a carriage to correspond, was perpetually seen +about this mansion; an elderly spinster, accompanied by a little boy, +also might be remarked coming thither daily. It was Miss Briggs and +little Rawdon, whose business it was to see to the inward renovation of +Sir Pitt's house, to superintend the female band engaged in stitching +the blinds and hangings, to poke and rummage in the drawers and +cupboards crammed with the dirty relics and congregated trumperies of a +couple of generations of Lady Crawleys, and to take inventories of the +china, the glass, and other properties in the closets and store-rooms. + +Mrs. Rawdon Crawley was general-in-chief over these arrangements, with +full orders from Sir Pitt to sell, barter, confiscate, or purchase +furniture, and she enjoyed herself not a little in an occupation which +gave full scope to her taste and ingenuity. The renovation of the +house was determined upon when Sir Pitt came to town in November to see +his lawyers, and when he passed nearly a week in Curzon Street, under +the roof of his affectionate brother and sister. + +He had put up at an hotel at first, but, Becky, as soon as she heard of +the Baronet's arrival, went off alone to greet him, and returned in an +hour to Curzon Street with Sir Pitt in the carriage by her side. It +was impossible sometimes to resist this artless little creature's +hospitalities, so kindly were they pressed, so frankly and amiably +offered. Becky seized Pitt's hand in a transport of gratitude when he +agreed to come. "Thank you," she said, squeezing it and looking into +the Baronet's eyes, who blushed a good deal; "how happy this will make +Rawdon!" She bustled up to Pitt's bedroom, leading on the servants, who +were carrying his trunks thither. She came in herself laughing, with a +coal-scuttle out of her own room. + +A fire was blazing already in Sir Pitt's apartment (it was Miss +Briggs's room, by the way, who was sent upstairs to sleep with the +maid). "I knew I should bring you," she said with pleasure beaming in +her glance. Indeed, she was really sincerely happy at having him for a +guest. + +Becky made Rawdon dine out once or twice on business, while Pitt stayed +with them, and the Baronet passed the happy evening alone with her and +Briggs. She went downstairs to the kitchen and actually cooked little +dishes for him. "Isn't it a good salmi?" she said; "I made it for you. +I can make you better dishes than that, and will when you come to see +me." + +"Everything you do, you do well," said the Baronet gallantly. "The +salmi is excellent indeed." + +"A poor man's wife," Rebecca replied gaily, "must make herself useful, +you know"; on which her brother-in-law vowed that "she was fit to be +the wife of an Emperor, and that to be skilful in domestic duties was +surely one of the most charming of woman's qualities." And Sir Pitt +thought, with something like mortification, of Lady Jane at home, and +of a certain pie which she had insisted on making, and serving to him +at dinner--a most abominable pie. + +Besides the salmi, which was made of Lord Steyne's pheasants from his +lordship's cottage of Stillbrook, Becky gave her brother-in-law a +bottle of white wine, some that Rawdon had brought with him from +France, and had picked up for nothing, the little story-teller said; +whereas the liquor was, in truth, some White Hermitage from the Marquis +of Steyne's famous cellars, which brought fire into the Baronet's +pallid cheeks and a glow into his feeble frame. + +Then when he had drunk up the bottle of petit vin blanc, she gave him +her hand, and took him up to the drawing-room, and made him snug on the +sofa by the fire, and let him talk as she listened with the tenderest +kindly interest, sitting by him, and hemming a shirt for her dear +little boy. Whenever Mrs. Rawdon wished to be particularly humble and +virtuous, this little shirt used to come out of her work-box. It had +got to be too small for Rawdon long before it was finished. + +Well, Rebecca listened to Pitt, she talked to him, she sang to him, she +coaxed him, and cuddled him, so that he found himself more and more +glad every day to get back from the lawyer's at Gray's Inn, to the +blazing fire in Curzon Street--a gladness in which the men of law +likewise participated, for Pitt's harangues were of the longest--and so +that when he went away he felt quite a pang at departing. How pretty +she looked kissing her hand to him from the carriage and waving her +handkerchief when he had taken his place in the mail! She put the +handkerchief to her eyes once. He pulled his sealskin cap over his, as +the coach drove away, and, sinking back, he thought to himself how she +respected him and how he deserved it, and how Rawdon was a foolish dull +fellow who didn't half appreciate his wife; and how mum and stupid his +own wife was compared to that brilliant little Becky. Becky had hinted +every one of these things herself, perhaps, but so delicately and +gently that you hardly knew when or where. And, before they parted, it +was agreed that the house in London should be redecorated for the next +season, and that the brothers' families should meet again in the +country at Christmas. + +"I wish you could have got a little money out of him," Rawdon said to +his wife moodily when the Baronet was gone. "I should like to give +something to old Raggles, hanged if I shouldn't. It ain't right, you +know, that the old fellow should be kept out of all his money. It may +be inconvenient, and he might let to somebody else besides us, you +know." + +"Tell him," said Becky, "that as soon as Sir Pitt's affairs are +settled, everybody will be paid, and give him a little something on +account. Here's a cheque that Pitt left for the boy," and she took +from her bag and gave her husband a paper which his brother had handed +over to her, on behalf of the little son and heir of the younger branch +of the Crawleys. + +The truth is, she had tried personally the ground on which her husband +expressed a wish that she should venture--tried it ever so delicately, +and found it unsafe. Even at a hint about embarrassments, Sir Pitt +Crawley was off and alarmed. And he began a long speech, explaining +how straitened he himself was in money matters; how the tenants would +not pay; how his father's affairs, and the expenses attendant upon the +demise of the old gentleman, had involved him; how he wanted to pay off +incumbrances; and how the bankers and agents were overdrawn; and Pitt +Crawley ended by making a compromise with his sister-in-law and giving +her a very small sum for the benefit of her little boy. + +Pitt knew how poor his brother and his brother's family must be. It +could not have escaped the notice of such a cool and experienced old +diplomatist that Rawdon's family had nothing to live upon, and that +houses and carriages are not to be kept for nothing. He knew very well +that he was the proprietor or appropriator of the money, which, +according to all proper calculation, ought to have fallen to his +younger brother, and he had, we may be sure, some secret pangs of +remorse within him, which warned him that he ought to perform some act +of justice, or, let us say, compensation, towards these disappointed +relations. A just, decent man, not without brains, who said his +prayers, and knew his catechism, and did his duty outwardly through +life, he could not be otherwise than aware that something was due to +his brother at his hands, and that morally he was Rawdon's debtor. + +But, as one reads in the columns of the Times newspaper every now and +then, queer announcements from the Chancellor of the Exchequer, +acknowledging the receipt of 50 pounds from A. B., or 10 pounds from +W. T., as conscience-money, on account of taxes due by the said A. B. +or W. T., which payments the penitents beg the Right Honourable +gentleman to acknowledge through the medium of the public press--so is +the Chancellor no doubt, and the reader likewise, always perfectly sure +that the above-named A. B. and W. T. are only paying a very small +instalment of what they really owe, and that the man who sends up a +twenty-pound note has very likely hundreds or thousands more for which +he ought to account. Such, at least, are my feelings, when I see +A. B. or W. T.'s insufficient acts of repentance. And I have no doubt +that Pitt Crawley's contrition, or kindness if you will, towards his +younger brother, by whom he had so much profited, was only a very small +dividend upon the capital sum in which he was indebted to Rawdon. Not +everybody is willing to pay even so much. To part with money is a +sacrifice beyond almost all men endowed with a sense of order. There +is scarcely any man alive who does not think himself meritorious for +giving his neighbour five pounds. Thriftless gives, not from a +beneficent pleasure in giving, but from a lazy delight in spending. He +would not deny himself one enjoyment; not his opera-stall, not his +horse, not his dinner, not even the pleasure of giving Lazarus the five +pounds. Thrifty, who is good, wise, just, and owes no man a penny, +turns from a beggar, haggles with a hackney-coachman, or denies a poor +relation, and I doubt which is the most selfish of the two. Money has +only a different value in the eyes of each. + +So, in a word, Pitt Crawley thought he would do something for his +brother, and then thought that he would think about it some other time. + +And with regard to Becky, she was not a woman who expected too much +from the generosity of her neighbours, and so was quite content with +all that Pitt Crawley had done for her. She was acknowledged by the +head of the family. If Pitt would not give her anything, he would get +something for her some day. If she got no money from her +brother-in-law, she got what was as good as money--credit. Raggles was +made rather easy in his mind by the spectacle of the union between the +brothers, by a small payment on the spot, and by the promise of a much +larger sum speedily to be assigned to him. And Rebecca told Miss +Briggs, whose Christmas dividend upon the little sum lent by her Becky +paid with an air of candid joy, and as if her exchequer was brimming +over with gold--Rebecca, we say, told Miss Briggs, in strict confidence +that she had conferred with Sir Pitt, who was famous as a financier, on +Briggs's special behalf, as to the most profitable investment of Miss +B.'s remaining capital; that Sir Pitt, after much consideration, had +thought of a most safe and advantageous way in which Briggs could lay +out her money; that, being especially interested in her as an attached +friend of the late Miss Crawley, and of the whole family, and that long +before he left town, he had recommended that she should be ready with +the money at a moment's notice, so as to purchase at the most +favourable opportunity the shares which Sir Pitt had in his eye. Poor +Miss Briggs was very grateful for this mark of Sir Pitt's attention--it +came so unsolicited, she said, for she never should have thought of +removing the money from the funds--and the delicacy enhanced the +kindness of the office; and she promised to see her man of business +immediately and be ready with her little cash at the proper hour. + +And this worthy woman was so grateful for the kindness of Rebecca in +the matter, and for that of her generous benefactor, the Colonel, that +she went out and spent a great part of her half-year's dividend in the +purchase of a black velvet coat for little Rawdon, who, by the way, was +grown almost too big for black velvet now, and was of a size and age +befitting him for the assumption of the virile jacket and pantaloons. + +He was a fine open-faced boy, with blue eyes and waving flaxen hair, +sturdy in limb, but generous and soft in heart, fondly attaching +himself to all who were good to him--to the pony--to Lord Southdown, +who gave him the horse (he used to blush and glow all over when he saw +that kind young nobleman)--to the groom who had charge of the pony--to +Molly, the cook, who crammed him with ghost stories at night, and with +good things from the dinner--to Briggs, whom he plagued and laughed +at--and to his father especially, whose attachment towards the lad was +curious too to witness. Here, as he grew to be about eight years old, +his attachments may be said to have ended. The beautiful mother-vision +had faded away after a while. During near two years she had scarcely +spoken to the child. She disliked him. He had the measles and the +hooping-cough. He bored her. One day when he was standing at the +landing-place, having crept down from the upper regions, attracted by +the sound of his mother's voice, who was singing to Lord Steyne, the +drawing room door opening suddenly, discovered the little spy, who but +a moment before had been rapt in delight, and listening to the music. + +His mother came out and struck him violently a couple of boxes on the +ear. He heard a laugh from the Marquis in the inner room (who was +amused by this free and artless exhibition of Becky's temper) and fled +down below to his friends of the kitchen, bursting in an agony of grief. + +"It is not because it hurts me," little Rawdon gasped +out--"only--only"--sobs and tears wound up the sentence in a storm. It +was the little boy's heart that was bleeding. "Why mayn't I hear her +singing? Why don't she ever sing to me--as she does to that baldheaded +man with the large teeth?" He gasped out at various intervals these +exclamations of rage and grief. The cook looked at the housemaid, the +housemaid looked knowingly at the footman--the awful kitchen inquisition +which sits in judgement in every house and knows everything--sat on +Rebecca at that moment. + +After this incident, the mother's dislike increased to hatred; the +consciousness that the child was in the house was a reproach and a pain +to her. His very sight annoyed her. Fear, doubt, and resistance +sprang up, too, in the boy's own bosom. They were separated from that +day of the boxes on the ear. + +Lord Steyne also heartily disliked the boy. When they met by +mischance, he made sarcastic bows or remarks to the child, or glared at +him with savage-looking eyes. Rawdon used to stare him in the face and +double his little fists in return. He knew his enemy, and this +gentleman, of all who came to the house, was the one who angered him +most. One day the footman found him squaring his fists at Lord +Steyne's hat in the hall. The footman told the circumstance as a good +joke to Lord Steyne's coachman; that officer imparted it to Lord +Steyne's gentleman, and to the servants' hall in general. And very soon +afterwards, when Mrs. Rawdon Crawley made her appearance at Gaunt +House, the porter who unbarred the gates, the servants of all uniforms +in the hall, the functionaries in white waistcoats, who bawled out from +landing to landing the names of Colonel and Mrs. Rawdon Crawley, knew +about her, or fancied they did. The man who brought her refreshment and +stood behind her chair, had talked her character over with the large +gentleman in motley-coloured clothes at his side. Bon Dieu! it is +awful, that servants' inquisition! You see a woman in a great party in +a splendid saloon, surrounded by faithful admirers, distributing +sparkling glances, dressed to perfection, curled, rouged, smiling and +happy--Discovery walks respectfully up to her, in the shape of a huge +powdered man with large calves and a tray of ices--with Calumny (which +is as fatal as truth) behind him, in the shape of the hulking fellow +carrying the wafer-biscuits. Madam, your secret will be talked over by +those men at their club at the public-house to-night. Jeames will tell +Chawles his notions about you over their pipes and pewter beer-pots. +Some people ought to have mutes for servants in Vanity Fair--mutes who +could not write. If you are guilty, tremble. That fellow behind your +chair may be a Janissary with a bow-string in his plush breeches +pocket. If you are not guilty, have a care of appearances, which are +as ruinous as guilt. + +"Was Rebecca guilty or not?" the Vehmgericht of the servants' hall had +pronounced against her. + +And, I shame to say, she would not have got credit had they not +believed her to be guilty. It was the sight of the Marquis of Steyne's +carriage-lamps at her door, contemplated by Raggles, burning in the +blackness of midnight, "that kep him up," as he afterwards said, that +even more than Rebecca's arts and coaxings. + +And so--guiltless very likely--she was writhing and pushing onward +towards what they call "a position in society," and the servants were +pointing at her as lost and ruined. So you see Molly, the housemaid, +of a morning, watching a spider in the doorpost lay his thread and +laboriously crawl up it, until, tired of the sport, she raises her +broom and sweeps away the thread and the artificer. + +A day or two before Christmas, Becky, her husband and her son made +ready and went to pass the holidays at the seat of their ancestors at +Queen's Crawley. Becky would have liked to leave the little brat +behind, and would have done so but for Lady Jane's urgent invitations +to the youngster, and the symptoms of revolt and discontent which +Rawdon manifested at her neglect of her son. "He's the finest boy in +England," the father said in a tone of reproach to her, "and you don't +seem to care for him, Becky, as much as you do for your spaniel. He +shan't bother you much; at home he will be away from you in the +nursery, and he shall go outside on the coach with me." + +"Where you go yourself because you want to smoke those filthy cigars," +replied Mrs. Rawdon. + +"I remember when you liked 'em though," answered the husband. + +Becky laughed; she was almost always good-humoured. "That was when I +was on my promotion, Goosey," she said. "Take Rawdon outside with you +and give him a cigar too if you like." + +Rawdon did not warm his little son for the winter's journey in this +way, but he and Briggs wrapped up the child in shawls and comforters, +and he was hoisted respectfully onto the roof of the coach in the dark +morning, under the lamps of the White Horse Cellar; and with no small +delight he watched the dawn rise and made his first journey to the +place which his father still called home. It was a journey of infinite +pleasure to the boy, to whom the incidents of the road afforded endless +interest, his father answering to him all questions connected with it +and telling him who lived in the great white house to the right, and +whom the park belonged to. His mother, inside the vehicle, with her +maid and her furs, her wrappers, and her scent bottles, made such a +to-do that you would have thought she never had been in a stage-coach +before--much less, that she had been turned out of this very one to +make room for a paying passenger on a certain journey performed some +half-score years ago. + +It was dark again when little Rawdon was wakened up to enter his +uncle's carriage at Mudbury, and he sat and looked out of it wondering +as the great iron gates flew open, and at the white trunks of the limes +as they swept by, until they stopped, at length, before the light +windows of the Hall, which were blazing and comfortable with Christmas +welcome. The hall-door was flung open--a big fire was burning in the +great old fire-place--a carpet was down over the chequered black +flags--"It's the old Turkey one that used to be in the Ladies' +Gallery," thought Rebecca, and the next instant was kissing Lady Jane. + +She and Sir Pitt performed the same salute with great gravity; but +Rawdon, having been smoking, hung back rather from his sister-in-law, +whose two children came up to their cousin; and, while Matilda held out +her hand and kissed him, Pitt Binkie Southdown, the son and heir, stood +aloof rather and examined him as a little dog does a big dog. + +Then the kind hostess conducted her guests to the snug apartments +blazing with cheerful fires. Then the young ladies came and knocked at +Mrs. Rawdon's door, under the pretence that they were desirous to be +useful, but in reality to have the pleasure of inspecting the contents +of her band and bonnet-boxes, and her dresses which, though black, were +of the newest London fashion. And they told her how much the Hall was +changed for the better, and how old Lady Southdown was gone, and how +Pitt was taking his station in the county, as became a Crawley in fact. +Then the great dinner-bell having rung, the family assembled at dinner, +at which meal Rawdon Junior was placed by his aunt, the good-natured +lady of the house, Sir Pitt being uncommonly attentive to his +sister-in-law at his own right hand. + +Little Rawdon exhibited a fine appetite and showed a gentlemanlike +behaviour. + +"I like to dine here," he said to his aunt when he had completed his +meal, at the conclusion of which, and after a decent grace by Sir Pitt, +the younger son and heir was introduced, and was perched on a high +chair by the Baronet's side, while the daughter took possession of the +place and the little wine-glass prepared for her near her mother. "I +like to dine here," said Rawdon Minor, looking up at his relation's +kind face. + +"Why?" said the good Lady Jane. + +"I dine in the kitchen when I am at home," replied Rawdon Minor, "or +else with Briggs." But Becky was so engaged with the Baronet, her host, +pouring out a flood of compliments and delights and raptures, and +admiring young Pitt Binkie, whom she declared to be the most beautiful, +intelligent, noble-looking little creature, and so like his father, +that she did not hear the remarks of her own flesh and blood at the +other end of the broad shining table. + +As a guest, and it being the first night of his arrival, Rawdon the +Second was allowed to sit up until the hour when tea being over, and a +great gilt book being laid on the table before Sir Pitt, all the +domestics of the family streamed in, and Sir Pitt read prayers. It was +the first time the poor little boy had ever witnessed or heard of such +a ceremonial. + +The house had been much improved even since the Baronet's brief reign, +and was pronounced by Becky to be perfect, charming, delightful, when +she surveyed it in his company. As for little Rawdon, who examined it +with the children for his guides, it seemed to him a perfect palace of +enchantment and wonder. There were long galleries, and ancient state +bedrooms, there were pictures and old China, and armour. There were +the rooms in which Grandpapa died, and by which the children walked +with terrified looks. "Who was Grandpapa?" he asked; and they told him +how he used to be very old, and used to be wheeled about in a +garden-chair, and they showed him the garden-chair one day rotting in +the out-house in which it had lain since the old gentleman had been +wheeled away yonder to the church, of which the spire was glittering +over the park elms. + +The brothers had good occupation for several mornings in examining the +improvements which had been effected by Sir Pitt's genius and economy. +And as they walked or rode, and looked at them, they could talk without +too much boring each other. And Pitt took care to tell Rawdon what a +heavy outlay of money these improvements had occasioned, and that a man +of landed and funded property was often very hard pressed for twenty +pounds. "There is that new lodge-gate," said Pitt, pointing to it +humbly with the bamboo cane, "I can no more pay for it before the +dividends in January than I can fly." + +"I can lend you, Pitt, till then," Rawdon answered rather ruefully; and +they went in and looked at the restored lodge, where the family arms +were just new scraped in stone, and where old Mrs. Lock, for the first +time these many long years, had tight doors, sound roofs, and whole +windows. + + + +CHAPTER XLV + +Between Hampshire and London + +Sir Pitt Crawley had done more than repair fences and restore +dilapidated lodges on the Queen's Crawley estate. Like a wise man he +had set to work to rebuild the injured popularity of his house and stop +up the gaps and ruins in which his name had been left by his +disreputable and thriftless old predecessor. He was elected for the +borough speedily after his father's demise; a magistrate, a member of +parliament, a county magnate and representative of an ancient family, +he made it his duty to show himself before the Hampshire public, +subscribed handsomely to the county charities, called assiduously upon +all the county folk, and laid himself out in a word to take that +position in Hampshire, and in the Empire afterwards, to which he +thought his prodigious talents justly entitled him. Lady Jane was +instructed to be friendly with the Fuddlestones, and the Wapshots, and +the other famous baronets, their neighbours. Their carriages might +frequently be seen in the Queen's Crawley avenue now; they dined pretty +frequently at the Hall (where the cookery was so good that it was clear +Lady Jane very seldom had a hand in it), and in return Pitt and his +wife most energetically dined out in all sorts of weather and at all +sorts of distances. For though Pitt did not care for joviality, being +a frigid man of poor hearth and appetite, yet he considered that to be +hospitable and condescending was quite incumbent on his station, and +every time that he got a headache from too long an after-dinner +sitting, he felt that he was a martyr to duty. He talked about crops, +corn-laws, politics, with the best country gentlemen. He (who had been +formerly inclined to be a sad free-thinker on these points) entered +into poaching and game preserving with ardour. He didn't hunt; he +wasn't a hunting man; he was a man of books and peaceful habits; but he +thought that the breed of horses must be kept up in the country, and +that the breed of foxes must therefore be looked to, and for his part, +if his friend, Sir Huddlestone Fuddlestone, liked to draw his country +and meet as of old the F. hounds used to do at Queen's Crawley, he +should be happy to see him there, and the gentlemen of the Fuddlestone +hunt. And to Lady Southdown's dismay too he became more orthodox in +his tendencies every day; gave up preaching in public and attending +meeting-houses; went stoutly to church; called on the Bishop and all +the Clergy at Winchester; and made no objection when the Venerable +Archdeacon Trumper asked for a game of whist. What pangs must have +been those of Lady Southdown, and what an utter castaway she must have +thought her son-in-law for permitting such a godless diversion! And +when, on the return of the family from an oratorio at Winchester, the +Baronet announced to the young ladies that he should next year very +probably take them to the "county balls," they worshipped him for his +kindness. Lady Jane was only too obedient, and perhaps glad herself to +go. The Dowager wrote off the direst descriptions of her daughter's +worldly behaviour to the authoress of the Washerwoman of Finchley +Common at the Cape; and her house in Brighton being about this time +unoccupied, returned to that watering-place, her absence being not very +much deplored by her children. We may suppose, too, that Rebecca, on +paying a second visit to Queen's Crawley, did not feel particularly +grieved at the absence of the lady of the medicine chest; though she +wrote a Christmas letter to her Ladyship, in which she respectfully +recalled herself to Lady Southdown's recollection, spoke with gratitude +of the delight which her Ladyship's conversation had given her on the +former visit, dilated on the kindness with which her Ladyship had +treated her in sickness, and declared that everything at Queen's +Crawley reminded her of her absent friend. + +A great part of the altered demeanour and popularity of Sir Pitt +Crawley might have been traced to the counsels of that astute little +lady of Curzon Street. "You remain a Baronet--you consent to be a mere +country gentleman," she said to him, while he had been her guest in +London. "No, Sir Pitt Crawley, I know you better. I know your talents +and your ambition. You fancy you hide them both, but you can conceal +neither from me. I showed Lord Steyne your pamphlet on malt. He was +familiar with it, and said it was in the opinion of the whole Cabinet +the most masterly thing that had appeared on the subject. The Ministry +has its eye upon you, and I know what you want. You want to +distinguish yourself in Parliament; every one says you are the finest +speaker in England (for your speeches at Oxford are still remembered). +You want to be Member for the County, where, with your own vote and +your borough at your back, you can command anything. And you want to +be Baron Crawley of Queen's Crawley, and will be before you die. I saw +it all. I could read your heart, Sir Pitt. If I had a husband who +possessed your intellect as he does your name, I sometimes think I +should not be unworthy of him--but--but I am your kinswoman now," she +added with a laugh. "Poor little penniless, I have got a little +interest--and who knows, perhaps the mouse may be able to aid the +lion." Pitt Crawley was amazed and enraptured with her speech. "How +that woman comprehends me!" he said. "I never could get Jane to read +three pages of the malt pamphlet. She has no idea that I have +commanding talents or secret ambition. So they remember my speaking at +Oxford, do they? The rascals! Now that I represent my borough and may +sit for the county, they begin to recollect me! Why, Lord Steyne cut +me at the levee last year; they are beginning to find out that Pitt +Crawley is some one at last. Yes, the man was always the same whom +these people neglected: it was only the opportunity that was wanting, +and I will show them now that I can speak and act as well as write. +Achilles did not declare himself until they gave him the sword. I hold +it now, and the world shall yet hear of Pitt Crawley." + +Therefore it was that this roguish diplomatist has grown so hospitable; +that he was so civil to oratorios and hospitals; so kind to Deans and +Chapters; so generous in giving and accepting dinners; so uncommonly +gracious to farmers on market-days; and so much interested about county +business; and that the Christmas at the Hall was the gayest which had +been known there for many a long day. + +On Christmas Day a great family gathering took place. All the Crawleys +from the Rectory came to dine. Rebecca was as frank and fond of Mrs. +Bute as if the other had never been her enemy; she was affectionately +interested in the dear girls, and surprised at the progress which they +had made in music since her time, and insisted upon encoring one of the +duets out of the great song-books which Jim, grumbling, had been forced +to bring under his arm from the Rectory. Mrs. Bute, perforce, was +obliged to adopt a decent demeanour towards the little adventuress--of +course being free to discourse with her daughters afterwards about the +absurd respect with which Sir Pitt treated his sister-in-law. But Jim, +who had sat next to her at dinner, declared she was a trump, and one +and all of the Rector's family agreed that the little Rawdon was a fine +boy. They respected a possible baronet in the boy, between whom and the +title there was only the little sickly pale Pitt Binkie. + +The children were very good friends. Pitt Binkie was too little a dog +for such a big dog as Rawdon to play with; and Matilda being only a +girl, of course not fit companion for a young gentleman who was near +eight years old, and going into jackets very soon. He took the command +of this small party at once--the little girl and the little boy +following him about with great reverence at such times as he +condescended to sport with them. His happiness and pleasure in the +country were extreme. The kitchen garden pleased him hugely, the +flowers moderately, but the pigeons and the poultry, and the stables +when he was allowed to visit them, were delightful objects to him. He +resisted being kissed by the Misses Crawley, but he allowed Lady Jane +sometimes to embrace him, and it was by her side that he liked to sit +when, the signal to retire to the drawing-room being given, the ladies +left the gentlemen to their claret--by her side rather than by his +mother. For Rebecca, seeing that tenderness was the fashion, called +Rawdon to her one evening and stooped down and kissed him in the +presence of all the ladies. + +He looked her full in the face after the operation, trembling and +turning very red, as his wont was when moved. "You never kiss me at +home, Mamma," he said, at which there was a general silence and +consternation and a by no means pleasant look in Becky's eyes. + +Rawdon was fond of his sister-in-law, for her regard for his son. Lady +Jane and Becky did not get on quite so well at this visit as on +occasion of the former one, when the Colonel's wife was bent upon +pleasing. Those two speeches of the child struck rather a chill. +Perhaps Sir Pitt was rather too attentive to her. + +But Rawdon, as became his age and size, was fonder of the society of +the men than of the women, and never wearied of accompanying his sire +to the stables, whither the Colonel retired to smoke his cigar--Jim, +the Rector's son, sometimes joining his cousin in that and other +amusements. He and the Baronet's keeper were very close friends, their +mutual taste for "dawgs" bringing them much together. On one day, Mr. +James, the Colonel, and Horn, the keeper, went and shot pheasants, +taking little Rawdon with them. On another most blissful morning, +these four gentlemen partook of the amusement of rat-hunting in a barn, +than which sport Rawdon as yet had never seen anything more noble. +They stopped up the ends of certain drains in the barn, into the other +openings of which ferrets were inserted, and then stood silently aloof, +with uplifted stakes in their hands, and an anxious little terrier (Mr. +James's celebrated "dawg" Forceps, indeed) scarcely breathing from +excitement, listening motionless on three legs, to the faint squeaking +of the rats below. Desperately bold at last, the persecuted animals +bolted above-ground--the terrier accounted for one, the keeper for +another; Rawdon, from flurry and excitement, missed his rat, but on the +other hand he half-murdered a ferret. + +But the greatest day of all was that on which Sir Huddlestone +Fuddlestone's hounds met upon the lawn at Queen's Crawley. + +That was a famous sight for little Rawdon. At half-past ten, Tom +Moody, Sir Huddlestone Fuddlestone's huntsman, was seen trotting up the +avenue, followed by the noble pack of hounds in a compact body--the +rear being brought up by the two whips clad in stained scarlet +frocks--light hard-featured lads on well-bred lean horses, possessing +marvellous dexterity in casting the points of their long heavy whips at +the thinnest part of any dog's skin who dares to straggle from the main +body, or to take the slightest notice, or even so much as wink, at the +hares and rabbits starting under their noses. + +Next comes boy Jack, Tom Moody's son, who weighs five stone, measures +eight-and-forty inches, and will never be any bigger. He is perched on +a large raw-boned hunter, half-covered by a capacious saddle. This +animal is Sir Huddlestone Fuddlestone's favourite horse the Nob. Other +horses, ridden by other small boys, arrive from time to time, awaiting +their masters, who will come cantering on anon. + +Tom Moody rides up to the door of the Hall, where he is welcomed by the +butler, who offers him drink, which he declines. He and his pack then +draw off into a sheltered corner of the lawn, where the dogs roll on +the grass, and play or growl angrily at one another, ever and anon +breaking out into furious fight speedily to be quelled by Tom's voice, +unmatched at rating, or the snaky thongs of the whips. + +Many young gentlemen canter up on thoroughbred hacks, spatter-dashed to +the knee, and enter the house to drink cherry-brandy and pay their +respects to the ladies, or, more modest and sportsmanlike, divest +themselves of their mud-boots, exchange their hacks for their hunters, +and warm their blood by a preliminary gallop round the lawn. Then they +collect round the pack in the corner and talk with Tom Moody of past +sport, and the merits of Sniveller and Diamond, and of the state of the +country and of the wretched breed of foxes. + +Sir Huddlestone presently appears mounted on a clever cob and rides up +to the Hall, where he enters and does the civil thing by the ladies, +after which, being a man of few words, he proceeds to business. The +hounds are drawn up to the hall-door, and little Rawdon descends +amongst them, excited yet half-alarmed by the caresses which they +bestow upon him, at the thumps he receives from their waving tails, and +at their canine bickerings, scarcely restrained by Tom Moody's tongue +and lash. + +Meanwhile, Sir Huddlestone has hoisted himself unwieldily on the Nob: +"Let's try Sowster's Spinney, Tom," says the Baronet, "Farmer Mangle +tells me there are two foxes in it." Tom blows his horn and trots off, +followed by the pack, by the whips, by the young gents from Winchester, +by the farmers of the neighbourhood, by the labourers of the parish on +foot, with whom the day is a great holiday, Sir Huddlestone bringing up +the rear with Colonel Crawley, and the whole cortege disappears down +the avenue. + +The Reverend Bute Crawley (who has been too modest to appear at the +public meet before his nephew's windows), whom Tom Moody remembers +forty years back a slender divine riding the wildest horses, jumping +the widest brooks, and larking over the newest gates in the country--his +Reverence, we say, happens to trot out from the Rectory Lane on his +powerful black horse just as Sir Huddlestone passes; he joins the +worthy Baronet. Hounds and horsemen disappear, and little Rawdon +remains on the doorsteps, wondering and happy. + +During the progress of this memorable holiday, little Rawdon, if he had +got no special liking for his uncle, always awful and cold and locked +up in his study, plunged in justice-business and surrounded by bailiffs +and farmers--has gained the good graces of his married and maiden +aunts, of the two little folks of the Hall, and of Jim of the Rectory, +whom Sir Pitt is encouraging to pay his addresses to one of the young +ladies, with an understanding doubtless that he shall be presented to +the living when it shall be vacated by his fox-hunting old sire. Jim +has given up that sport himself and confines himself to a little +harmless duck- or snipe-shooting, or a little quiet trifling with the +rats during the Christmas holidays, after which he will return to the +University and try and not be plucked, once more. He has already +eschewed green coats, red neckcloths, and other worldly ornaments, and +is preparing himself for a change in his condition. In this cheap and +thrifty way Sir Pitt tries to pay off his debt to his family. + +Also before this merry Christmas was over, the Baronet had screwed up +courage enough to give his brother another draft on his bankers, and +for no less a sum than a hundred pounds, an act which caused Sir Pitt +cruel pangs at first, but which made him glow afterwards to think +himself one of the most generous of men. Rawdon and his son went away +with the utmost heaviness of heart. Becky and the ladies parted with +some alacrity, however, and our friend returned to London to commence +those avocations with which we find her occupied when this chapter +begins. Under her care the Crawley House in Great Gaunt Street was +quite rejuvenescent and ready for the reception of Sir Pitt and his +family, when the Baronet came to London to attend his duties in +Parliament and to assume that position in the country for which his +vast genius fitted him. + +For the first session, this profound dissembler hid his projects and +never opened his lips but to present a petition from Mudbury. But he +attended assiduously in his place and learned thoroughly the routine +and business of the House. At home he gave himself up to the perusal +of Blue Books, to the alarm and wonder of Lady Jane, who thought he was +killing himself by late hours and intense application. And he made +acquaintance with the ministers, and the chiefs of his party, +determining to rank as one of them before many years were over. + +Lady Jane's sweetness and kindness had inspired Rebecca with such a +contempt for her ladyship as the little woman found no small difficulty +in concealing. That sort of goodness and simplicity which Lady Jane +possessed annoyed our friend Becky, and it was impossible for her at +times not to show, or to let the other divine, her scorn. Her presence, +too, rendered Lady Jane uneasy. Her husband talked constantly with +Becky. Signs of intelligence seemed to pass between them, and Pitt +spoke with her on subjects on which he never thought of discoursing +with Lady Jane. The latter did not understand them, to be sure, but it +was mortifying to remain silent; still more mortifying to know that you +had nothing to say, and hear that little audacious Mrs. Rawdon dashing +on from subject to subject, with a word for every man, and a joke +always pat; and to sit in one's own house alone, by the fireside, and +watching all the men round your rival. + +In the country, when Lady Jane was telling stories to the children, who +clustered about her knees (little Rawdon into the bargain, who was very +fond of her), and Becky came into the room, sneering with green +scornful eyes, poor Lady Jane grew silent under those baleful glances. +Her simple little fancies shrank away tremulously, as fairies in the +story-books, before a superior bad angel. She could not go on, +although Rebecca, with the smallest inflection of sarcasm in her voice, +besought her to continue that charming story. And on her side gentle +thoughts and simple pleasures were odious to Mrs. Becky; they discorded +with her; she hated people for liking them; she spurned children and +children-lovers. "I have no taste for bread and butter," she would +say, when caricaturing Lady Jane and her ways to my Lord Steyne. + +"No more has a certain person for holy water," his lordship replied +with a bow and a grin and a great jarring laugh afterwards. + +So these two ladies did not see much of each other except upon those +occasions when the younger brother's wife, having an object to gain +from the other, frequented her. They my-loved and my-deared each other +assiduously, but kept apart generally, whereas Sir Pitt, in the midst +of his multiplied avocations, found daily time to see his sister-in-law. + +On the occasion of his first Speaker's dinner, Sir Pitt took the +opportunity of appearing before his sister-in-law in his uniform--that +old diplomatic suit which he had worn when attache to the Pumpernickel +legation. + +Becky complimented him upon that dress and admired him almost as much +as his own wife and children, to whom he displayed himself before he +set out. She said that it was only the thoroughbred gentleman who +could wear the Court suit with advantage: it was only your men of +ancient race whom the culotte courte became. Pitt looked down with +complacency at his legs, which had not, in truth, much more symmetry or +swell than the lean Court sword which dangled by his side--looked down +at his legs, and thought in his heart that he was killing. + +When he was gone, Mrs. Becky made a caricature of his figure, which she +showed to Lord Steyne when he arrived. His lordship carried off the +sketch, delighted with the accuracy of the resemblance. He had done +Sir Pitt Crawley the honour to meet him at Mrs. Becky's house and had +been most gracious to the new Baronet and member. Pitt was struck too +by the deference with which the great Peer treated his sister-in-law, +by her ease and sprightliness in the conversation, and by the delight +with which the other men of the party listened to her talk. Lord Steyne +made no doubt but that the Baronet had only commenced his career in +public life, and expected rather anxiously to hear him as an orator; as +they were neighbours (for Great Gaunt Street leads into Gaunt Square, +whereof Gaunt House, as everybody knows, forms one side) my lord hoped +that as soon as Lady Steyne arrived in London she would have the honour +of making the acquaintance of Lady Crawley. He left a card upon his +neighbour in the course of a day or two, having never thought fit to +notice his predecessor, though they had lived near each other for near +a century past. + +In the midst of these intrigues and fine parties and wise and brilliant +personages Rawdon felt himself more and more isolated every day. He +was allowed to go to the club more; to dine abroad with bachelor +friends; to come and go when he liked, without any questions being +asked. And he and Rawdon the younger many a time would walk to Gaunt +Street and sit with the lady and the children there while Sir Pitt was +closeted with Rebecca, on his way to the House, or on his return from +it. + +The ex-Colonel would sit for hours in his brother's house very silent, +and thinking and doing as little as possible. He was glad to be +employed of an errand; to go and make inquiries about a horse or a +servant, or to carve the roast mutton for the dinner of the children. +He was beat and cowed into laziness and submission. Delilah had +imprisoned him and cut his hair off, too. The bold and reckless young +blood of ten-years back was subjugated and was turned into a torpid, +submissive, middle-aged, stout gentleman. + +And poor Lady Jane was aware that Rebecca had captivated her husband, +although she and Mrs. Rawdon my-deared and my-loved each other every +day they met. + + + +CHAPTER XLVI + +Struggles and Trials + +Our friends at Brompton were meanwhile passing their Christmas after +their fashion and in a manner by no means too cheerful. + +Out of the hundred pounds a year, which was about the amount of her +income, the Widow Osborne had been in the habit of giving up nearly +three-fourths to her father and mother, for the expenses of herself and +her little boy. With 120_l_. more, supplied by Jos, this family of four +people, attended by a single Irish servant who also did for Clapp and +his wife, might manage to live in decent comfort through the year, and +hold up their heads yet, and be able to give a friend a dish of tea +still, after the storms and disappointments of their early life. Sedley +still maintained his ascendency over the family of Mr. Clapp, his +ex-clerk. Clapp remembered the time when, sitting on the edge of the +chair, he tossed off a bumper to the health of "Mrs. S--, Miss Emmy, +and Mr. Joseph in India," at the merchant's rich table in Russell +Square. Time magnified the splendour of those recollections in the +honest clerk's bosom. Whenever he came up from the kitchen-parlour to +the drawing-room and partook of tea or gin-and-water with Mr. Sedley, +he would say, "This was not what you was accustomed to once, sir," and +as gravely and reverentially drink the health of the ladies as he had +done in the days of their utmost prosperity. He thought Miss 'Melia's +playing the divinest music ever performed, and her the finest lady. He +never would sit down before Sedley at the club even, nor would he have +that gentleman's character abused by any member of the society. He had +seen the first men in London shaking hands with Mr. S--; he said, "He'd +known him in times when Rothschild might be seen on 'Change with him +any day, and he owed him personally everythink." + +Clapp, with the best of characters and handwritings, had been able very +soon after his master's disaster to find other employment for himself. +"Such a little fish as me can swim in any bucket," he used to remark, +and a member of the house from which old Sedley had seceded was very +glad to make use of Mr. Clapp's services and to reward them with a +comfortable salary. In fine, all Sedley's wealthy friends had dropped +off one by one, and this poor ex-dependent still remained faithfully +attached to him. + +Out of the small residue of her income which Amelia kept back for +herself, the widow had need of all the thrift and care possible in +order to enable her to keep her darling boy dressed in such a manner as +became George Osborne's son, and to defray the expenses of the little +school to which, after much misgiving and reluctance and many secret +pangs and fears on her own part, she had been induced to send the lad. +She had sat up of nights conning lessons and spelling over crabbed +grammars and geography books in order to teach them to Georgy. She had +worked even at the Latin accidence, fondly hoping that she might be +capable of instructing him in that language. To part with him all day, +to send him out to the mercy of a schoolmaster's cane and his +schoolfellows' roughness, was almost like weaning him over again to +that weak mother, so tremulous and full of sensibility. He, for his +part, rushed off to the school with the utmost happiness. He was +longing for the change. That childish gladness wounded his mother, who +was herself so grieved to part with him. She would rather have had him +more sorry, she thought, and then was deeply repentant within herself +for daring to be so selfish as to wish her own son to be unhappy. + +Georgy made great progress in the school, which was kept by a friend of +his mother's constant admirer, the Rev. Mr. Binny. He brought home +numberless prizes and testimonials of ability. He told his mother +countless stories every night about his school-companions: and what a +fine fellow Lyons was, and what a sneak Sniffin was, and how Steel's +father actually supplied the meat for the establishment, whereas +Golding's mother came in a carriage to fetch him every Saturday, and +how Neat had straps to his trowsers--might he have straps?--and how +Bull Major was so strong (though only in Eutropius) that it was +believed he could lick the Usher, Mr. Ward, himself. So Amelia learned +to know every one of the boys in that school as well as Georgy himself, +and of nights she used to help him in his exercises and puzzle her +little head over his lessons as eagerly as if she was herself going in +the morning into the presence of the master. Once, after a certain +combat with Master Smith, George came home to his mother with a black +eye, and bragged prodigiously to his parent and his delighted old +grandfather about his valour in the fight, in which, if the truth was +known he did not behave with particular heroism, and in which he +decidedly had the worst. But Amelia has never forgiven that Smith to +this day, though he is now a peaceful apothecary near Leicester Square. + +In these quiet labours and harmless cares the gentle widow's life was +passing away, a silver hair or two marking the progress of time on her +head and a line deepening ever so little on her fair forehead. She +used to smile at these marks of time. "What matters it," she asked, +"For an old woman like me?" All she hoped for was to live to see her +son great, famous, and glorious, as he deserved to be. She kept his +copy-books, his drawings, and compositions, and showed them about in +her little circle as if they were miracles of genius. She confided +some of these specimens to Miss Dobbin, to show them to Miss Osborne, +George's aunt, to show them to Mr. Osborne himself--to make that old +man repent of his cruelty and ill feeling towards him who was gone. +All her husband's faults and foibles she had buried in the grave with +him: she only remembered the lover, who had married her at all +sacrifices, the noble husband, so brave and beautiful, in whose arms +she had hung on the morning when he had gone away to fight, and die +gloriously for his king. From heaven the hero must be smiling down upon +that paragon of a boy whom he had left to comfort and console her. We +have seen how one of George's grandfathers (Mr. Osborne), in his easy +chair in Russell Square, daily grew more violent and moody, and how his +daughter, with her fine carriage, and her fine horses, and her name on +half the public charity-lists of the town, was a lonely, miserable, +persecuted old maid. She thought again and again of the beautiful +little boy, her brother's son, whom she had seen. She longed to be +allowed to drive in the fine carriage to the house in which he lived, +and she used to look out day after day as she took her solitary drive +in the park, in hopes that she might see him. Her sister, the banker's +lady, occasionally condescended to pay her old home and companion a +visit in Russell Square. She brought a couple of sickly children +attended by a prim nurse, and in a faint genteel giggling tone cackled +to her sister about her fine acquaintance, and how her little Frederick +was the image of Lord Claud Lollypop and her sweet Maria had been +noticed by the Baroness as they were driving in their donkey-chaise at +Roehampton. She urged her to make her papa do something for the +darlings. Frederick she had determined should go into the Guards; and +if they made an elder son of him (and Mr. Bullock was positively +ruining and pinching himself to death to buy land), how was the darling +girl to be provided for? "I expect YOU, dear," Mrs. Bullock would say, +"for of course my share of our Papa's property must go to the head of +the house, you know. Dear Rhoda McMull will disengage the whole of the +Castletoddy property as soon as poor dear Lord Castletoddy dies, who is +quite epileptic; and little Macduff McMull will be Viscount +Castletoddy. Both the Mr. Bludyers of Mincing Lane have settled their +fortunes on Fanny Bludyer's little boy. My darling Frederick must +positively be an eldest son; and--and do ask Papa to bring us back his +account in Lombard Street, will you, dear? It doesn't look well, his +going to Stumpy and Rowdy's." After which kind of speeches, in which +fashion and the main chance were blended together, and after a kiss, +which was like the contact of an oyster--Mrs. Frederick Bullock would +gather her starched nurslings and simper back into her carriage. + +Every visit which this leader of ton paid to her family was more +unlucky for her. Her father paid more money into Stumpy and Rowdy's. +Her patronage became more and more insufferable. The poor widow in the +little cottage at Brompton, guarding her treasure there, little knew +how eagerly some people coveted it. + +On that night when Jane Osborne had told her father that she had seen +his grandson, the old man had made her no reply, but he had shown no +anger--and had bade her good-night on going himself to his room in +rather a kindly voice. And he must have meditated on what she said and +have made some inquiries of the Dobbin family regarding her visit, for +a fortnight after it took place, he asked her where was her little +French watch and chain she used to wear? + +"I bought it with my money, sir," she said in a great fright. + +"Go and order another like it, or a better if you can get it," said the +old gentleman and lapsed again into silence. + +Of late the Misses Dobbin more than once repeated their entreaties to +Amelia, to allow George to visit them. His aunt had shown her +inclination; perhaps his grandfather himself, they hinted, might be +disposed to be reconciled to him. Surely, Amelia could not refuse such +advantageous chances for the boy. Nor could she, but she acceded to +their overtures with a very heavy and suspicious heart, was always +uneasy during the child's absence from her, and welcomed him back as if +he was rescued out of some danger. He brought back money and toys, at +which the widow looked with alarm and jealousy; she asked him always if +he had seen any gentleman--"Only old Sir William, who drove him about +in the four-wheeled chaise, and Mr. Dobbin, who arrived on the +beautiful bay horse in the afternoon--in the green coat and pink +neck-cloth, with the gold-headed whip, who promised to show him the +Tower of London and take him out with the Surrey hounds." At last, he +said, "There was an old gentleman, with thick eyebrows, and a broad +hat, and large chain and seals." He came one day as the coachman was +lunging Georgy round the lawn on the gray pony. "He looked at me very +much. He shook very much. I said 'My name is Norval' after dinner. +My aunt began to cry. She is always crying." Such was George's report +on that night. + +Then Amelia knew that the boy had seen his grandfather; and looked out +feverishly for a proposal which she was sure would follow, and which +came, in fact, in a few days afterwards. Mr. Osborne formally offered +to take the boy and make him heir to the fortune which he had intended +that his father should inherit. He would make Mrs. George Osborne an +allowance, such as to assure her a decent competency. If Mrs. George +Osborne proposed to marry again, as Mr. O. heard was her intention, he +would not withdraw that allowance. But it must be understood that the +child would live entirely with his grandfather in Russell Square, or at +whatever other place Mr. O. should select, and that he would be +occasionally permitted to see Mrs. George Osborne at her own residence. +This message was brought or read to her in a letter one day, when her +mother was from home and her father absent as usual in the City. + +She was never seen angry but twice or thrice in her life, and it was in +one of these moods that Mr. Osborne's attorney had the fortune to +behold her. She rose up trembling and flushing very much as soon as, +after reading the letter, Mr. Poe handed it to her, and she tore the +paper into a hundred fragments, which she trod on. "I marry again! I +take money to part from my child! Who dares insult me by proposing +such a thing? Tell Mr. Osborne it is a cowardly letter, sir--a cowardly +letter--I will not answer it. I wish you good morning, sir--and she +bowed me out of the room like a tragedy Queen," said the lawyer who +told the story. + +Her parents never remarked her agitation on that day, and she never +told them of the interview. They had their own affairs to interest +them, affairs which deeply interested this innocent and unconscious +lady. The old gentleman, her father, was always dabbling in +speculation. We have seen how the wine company and the coal company had +failed him. But, prowling about the City always eagerly and restlessly +still, he lighted upon some other scheme, of which he thought so well +that he embarked in it in spite of the remonstrances of Mr. Clapp, to +whom indeed he never dared to tell how far he had engaged himself in +it. And as it was always Mr. Sedley's maxim not to talk about money +matters before women, they had no inkling of the misfortunes that were +in store for them until the unhappy old gentleman was forced to make +gradual confessions. + +The bills of the little household, which had been settled weekly, first +fell into arrear. The remittances had not arrived from India, Mr. +Sedley told his wife with a disturbed face. As she had paid her bills +very regularly hitherto, one or two of the tradesmen to whom the poor +lady was obliged to go round asking for time were very angry at a delay +to which they were perfectly used from more irregular customers. +Emmy's contribution, paid over cheerfully without any questions, kept +the little company in half-rations however. And the first six months +passed away pretty easily, old Sedley still keeping up with the notion +that his shares must rise and that all would be well. + +No sixty pounds, however, came to help the household at the end of the +half year, and it fell deeper and deeper into trouble--Mrs. Sedley, who +was growing infirm and was much shaken, remained silent or wept a great +deal with Mrs. Clapp in the kitchen. The butcher was particularly +surly, the grocer insolent: once or twice little Georgy had grumbled +about the dinners, and Amelia, who still would have been satisfied with +a slice of bread for her own dinner, could not but perceive that her +son was neglected and purchased little things out of her private purse +to keep the boy in health. + +At last they told her, or told her such a garbled story as people in +difficulties tell. One day, her own money having been received, and +Amelia about to pay it over, she, who had kept an account of the moneys +expended by her, proposed to keep a certain portion back out of her +dividend, having contracted engagements for a new suit for Georgy. + +Then it came out that Jos's remittances were not paid, that the house +was in difficulties, which Amelia ought to have seen before, her mother +said, but she cared for nothing or nobody except Georgy. At this she +passed all her money across the table, without a word, to her mother, +and returned to her room to cry her eyes out. She had a great access of +sensibility too that day, when obliged to go and countermand the +clothes, the darling clothes on which she had set her heart for +Christmas Day, and the cut and fashion of which she had arranged in +many conversations with a small milliner, her friend. + +Hardest of all, she had to break the matter to Georgy, who made a loud +outcry. Everybody had new clothes at Christmas. The others would +laugh at him. He would have new clothes. She had promised them to +him. The poor widow had only kisses to give him. She darned the old +suit in tears. She cast about among her little ornaments to see if she +could sell anything to procure the desired novelties. There was her +India shawl that Dobbin had sent her. She remembered in former days +going with her mother to a fine India shop on Ludgate Hill, where the +ladies had all sorts of dealings and bargains in these articles. Her +cheeks flushed and her eyes shone with pleasure as she thought of this +resource, and she kissed away George to school in the morning, smiling +brightly after him. The boy felt that there was good news in her look. + +Packing up her shawl in a handkerchief (another of the gifts of the +good Major), she hid them under her cloak and walked flushed and eager +all the way to Ludgate Hill, tripping along by the park wall and +running over the crossings, so that many a man turned as she hurried by +him and looked after her rosy pretty face. She calculated how she +should spend the proceeds of her shawl--how, besides the clothes, she +would buy the books that he longed for, and pay his half-year's +schooling; and how she would buy a cloak for her father instead of that +old great-coat which he wore. She was not mistaken as to the value of +the Major's gift. It was a very fine and beautiful web, and the +merchant made a very good bargain when he gave her twenty guineas for +her shawl. + +She ran on amazed and flurried with her riches to Darton's shop, in St. +Paul's Churchyard, and there purchased the Parents' Assistant and the +Sandford and Merton Georgy longed for, and got into the coach there +with her parcel, and went home exulting. And she pleased herself by +writing in the fly-leaf in her neatest little hand, "George Osborne, A +Christmas gift from his affectionate mother." The books are extant to +this day, with the fair delicate superscription. + +She was going from her own room with the books in her hand to place +them on George's table, where he might find them on his return from +school, when in the passage, she and her mother met. The gilt bindings +of the seven handsome little volumes caught the old lady's eye. + +"What are those?" she said. + +"Some books for Georgy," Amelia replied--"I--I promised them to him at +Christmas." + +"Books!" cried the elder lady indignantly, "Books, when the whole house +wants bread! Books, when to keep you and your son in luxury, and your +dear father out of gaol, I've sold every trinket I had, the India shawl +from my back even down to the very spoons, that our tradesmen mightn't +insult us, and that Mr. Clapp, which indeed he is justly entitled, +being not a hard landlord, and a civil man, and a father, might have +his rent. Oh, Amelia! you break my heart with your books and that boy +of yours, whom you are ruining, though part with him you will not. Oh, +Amelia, may God send you a more dutiful child than I have had! There's +Jos, deserts his father in his old age; and there's George, who might +be provided for, and who might be rich, going to school like a lord, +with a gold watch and chain round his neck--while my dear, dear old man +is without a sh--shilling." Hysteric sobs and cries ended Mrs. Sedley's +speech--it echoed through every room in the small house, whereof the +other female inmates heard every word of the colloquy. + +"Oh, Mother, Mother!" cried poor Amelia in reply. "You told me +nothing--I--I promised him the books. I--I only sold my shawl this +morning. Take the money--take everything"--and with quivering hands +she took out her silver, and her sovereigns--her precious golden +sovereigns, which she thrust into the hands of her mother, whence they +overflowed and tumbled, rolling down the stairs. + +And then she went into her room, and sank down in despair and utter +misery. She saw it all now. Her selfishness was sacrificing the boy. +But for her he might have wealth, station, education, and his father's +place, which the elder George had forfeited for her sake. She had but +to speak the words, and her father was restored to competency and the +boy raised to fortune. Oh, what a conviction it was to that tender and +stricken heart! + + + +CHAPTER XLVII + +Gaunt House + +All the world knows that Lord Steyne's town palace stands in Gaunt +Square, out of which Great Gaunt Street leads, whither we first +conducted Rebecca, in the time of the departed Sir Pitt Crawley. +Peering over the railings and through the black trees into the garden +of the Square, you see a few miserable governesses with wan-faced +pupils wandering round and round it, and round the dreary grass-plot in +the centre of which rises the statue of Lord Gaunt, who fought at +Minden, in a three-tailed wig, and otherwise habited like a Roman +Emperor. Gaunt House occupies nearly a side of the Square. The +remaining three sides are composed of mansions that have passed away +into dowagerism--tall, dark houses, with window-frames of stone, or +picked out of a lighter red. Little light seems to be behind those +lean, comfortless casements now, and hospitality to have passed away +from those doors as much as the laced lacqueys and link-boys of old +times, who used to put out their torches in the blank iron +extinguishers that still flank the lamps over the steps. Brass plates +have penetrated into the square--Doctors, the Diddlesex Bank Western +Branch--the English and European Reunion, &c.--it has a dreary +look--nor is my Lord Steyne's palace less dreary. All I have ever seen +of it is the vast wall in front, with the rustic columns at the great +gate, through which an old porter peers sometimes with a fat and gloomy +red face--and over the wall the garret and bedroom windows, and the +chimneys, out of which there seldom comes any smoke now. For the +present Lord Steyne lives at Naples, preferring the view of the Bay and +Capri and Vesuvius to the dreary aspect of the wall in Gaunt Square. + +A few score yards down New Gaunt Street, and leading into Gaunt Mews +indeed, is a little modest back door, which you would not remark from +that of any of the other stables. But many a little close carriage has +stopped at that door, as my informant (little Tom Eaves, who knows +everything, and who showed me the place) told me. "The Prince and +Perdita have been in and out of that door, sir," he had often told me; +"Marianne Clarke has entered it with the Duke of ------. It conducts to +the famous petits appartements of Lord Steyne--one, sir, fitted up all +in ivory and white satin, another in ebony and black velvet; there is a +little banqueting-room taken from Sallust's house at Pompeii, and +painted by Cosway--a little private kitchen, in which every saucepan +was silver and all the spits were gold. It was there that Egalite +Orleans roasted partridges on the night when he and the Marquis of +Steyne won a hundred thousand from a great personage at ombre. Half of +the money went to the French Revolution, half to purchase Lord Gaunt's +Marquisate and Garter--and the remainder--" but it forms no part of our +scheme to tell what became of the remainder, for every shilling of +which, and a great deal more, little Tom Eaves, who knows everybody's +affairs, is ready to account. + +Besides his town palace, the Marquis had castles and palaces in various +quarters of the three kingdoms, whereof the descriptions may be found +in the road-books--Castle Strongbow, with its woods, on the Shannon +shore; Gaunt Castle, in Carmarthenshire, where Richard II was taken +prisoner--Gauntly Hall in Yorkshire, where I have been informed there +were two hundred silver teapots for the breakfasts of the guests of the +house, with everything to correspond in splendour; and Stillbrook in +Hampshire, which was my lord's farm, an humble place of residence, of +which we all remember the wonderful furniture which was sold at my +lord's demise by a late celebrated auctioneer. + +The Marchioness of Steyne was of the renowned and ancient family of the +Caerlyons, Marquises of Camelot, who have preserved the old faith ever +since the conversion of the venerable Druid, their first ancestor, and +whose pedigree goes far beyond the date of the arrival of King Brute in +these islands. Pendragon is the title of the eldest son of the house. +The sons have been called Arthurs, Uthers, and Caradocs, from +immemorial time. Their heads have fallen in many a loyal conspiracy. +Elizabeth chopped off the head of the Arthur of her day, who had been +Chamberlain to Philip and Mary, and carried letters between the Queen +of Scots and her uncles the Guises. A cadet of the house was an +officer of the great Duke and distinguished in the famous Saint +Bartholomew conspiracy. During the whole of Mary's confinement, the +house of Camelot conspired in her behalf. It was as much injured by its +charges in fitting out an armament against the Spaniards, during the +time of the Armada, as by the fines and confiscations levied on it by +Elizabeth for harbouring of priests, obstinate recusancy, and popish +misdoings. A recreant of James's time was momentarily perverted from +his religion by the arguments of that great theologian, and the +fortunes of the family somewhat restored by his timely weakness. But +the Earl of Camelot, of the reign of Charles, returned to the old creed +of his family, and they continued to fight for it, and ruin themselves +for it, as long as there was a Stuart left to head or to instigate a +rebellion. + +Lady Mary Caerlyon was brought up at a Parisian convent; the Dauphiness +Marie Antoinette was her godmother. In the pride of her beauty she had +been married--sold, it was said--to Lord Gaunt, then at Paris, who won +vast sums from the lady's brother at some of Philip of Orleans's +banquets. The Earl of Gaunt's famous duel with the Count de la Marche, +of the Grey Musqueteers, was attributed by common report to the +pretensions of that officer (who had been a page, and remained a +favourite of the Queen) to the hand of the beautiful Lady Mary +Caerlyon. She was married to Lord Gaunt while the Count lay ill of his +wound, and came to dwell at Gaunt House, and to figure for a short time +in the splendid Court of the Prince of Wales. Fox had toasted her. +Morris and Sheridan had written songs about her. Malmesbury had made +her his best bow; Walpole had pronounced her charming; Devonshire had +been almost jealous of her; but she was scared by the wild pleasures +and gaieties of the society into which she was flung, and after she had +borne a couple of sons, shrank away into a life of devout seclusion. +No wonder that my Lord Steyne, who liked pleasure and cheerfulness, was +not often seen after their marriage by the side of this trembling, +silent, superstitious, unhappy lady. + +The before-mentioned Tom Eaves (who has no part in this history, except +that he knew all the great folks in London, and the stories and +mysteries of each family) had further information regarding my Lady +Steyne, which may or may not be true. "The humiliations," Tom used to +say, "which that woman has been made to undergo, in her own house, have +been frightful; Lord Steyne has made her sit down to table with women +with whom I would rather die than allow Mrs. Eaves to associate--with +Lady Crackenbury, with Mrs. Chippenham, with Madame de la Cruchecassee, +the French secretary's wife (from every one of which ladies Tom +Eaves--who would have sacrificed his wife for knowing them--was too +glad to get a bow or a dinner) with the REIGNING FAVOURITE in a word. +And do you suppose that that woman, of that family, who are as proud as +the Bourbons, and to whom the Steynes are but lackeys, mushrooms of +yesterday (for after all, they are not of the Old Gaunts, but of a +minor and doubtful branch of the house); do you suppose, I say (the +reader must bear in mind that it is always Tom Eaves who speaks) that +the Marchioness of Steyne, the haughtiest woman in England, would bend +down to her husband so submissively if there were not some cause? Pooh! +I tell you there are secret reasons. I tell you that, in the +emigration, the Abbe de la Marche who was here and was employed in the +Quiberoon business with Puisaye and Tinteniac, was the same Colonel of +Mousquetaires Gris with whom Steyne fought in the year '86--that he and +the Marchioness met again--that it was after the Reverend Colonel was +shot in Brittany that Lady Steyne took to those extreme practices of +devotion which she carries on now; for she is closeted with her +director every day--she is at service at Spanish Place, every morning, +I've watched her there--that is, I've happened to be passing there--and +depend on it, there's a mystery in her case. People are not so unhappy +unless they have something to repent of," added Tom Eaves with a +knowing wag of his head; "and depend on it, that woman would not be so +submissive as she is if the Marquis had not some sword to hold over +her." + +So, if Mr. Eaves's information be correct, it is very likely that this +lady, in her high station, had to submit to many a private indignity +and to hide many secret griefs under a calm face. And let us, my +brethren who have not our names in the Red Book, console ourselves by +thinking comfortably how miserable our betters may be, and that +Damocles, who sits on satin cushions and is served on gold plate, has +an awful sword hanging over his head in the shape of a bailiff, or an +hereditary disease, or a family secret, which peeps out every now and +then from the embroidered arras in a ghastly manner, and will be sure +to drop one day or the other in the right place. + +In comparing, too, the poor man's situation with that of the great, +there is (always according to Mr. Eaves) another source of comfort for +the former. You who have little or no patrimony to bequeath or to +inherit, may be on good terms with your father or your son, whereas the +heir of a great prince, such as my Lord Steyne, must naturally be angry +at being kept out of his kingdom, and eye the occupant of it with no +very agreeable glances. "Take it as a rule," this sardonic old Eaves +would say, "the fathers and elder sons of all great families hate each +other. The Crown Prince is always in opposition to the crown or +hankering after it. Shakespeare knew the world, my good sir, and when +he describes Prince Hal (from whose family the Gaunts pretend to be +descended, though they are no more related to John of Gaunt than you +are) trying on his father's coronet, he gives you a natural description +of all heirs apparent. If you were heir to a dukedom and a thousand +pounds a day, do you mean to say you would not wish for possession? +Pooh! And it stands to reason that every great man, having experienced +this feeling towards his father, must be aware that his son entertains +it towards himself; and so they can't but be suspicious and hostile. + +"Then again, as to the feeling of elder towards younger sons. My dear +sir, you ought to know that every elder brother looks upon the cadets +of the house as his natural enemies, who deprive him of so much ready +money which ought to be his by right. I have often heard George Mac +Turk, Lord Bajazet's eldest son, say that if he had his will when he +came to the title, he would do what the sultans do, and clear the +estate by chopping off all his younger brothers' heads at once; and so +the case is, more or less, with them all. I tell you they are all +Turks in their hearts. Pooh! sir, they know the world." And here, +haply, a great man coming up, Tom Eaves's hat would drop off his head, +and he would rush forward with a bow and a grin, which showed that he +knew the world too--in the Tomeavesian way, that is. And having laid +out every shilling of his fortune on an annuity, Tom could afford to +bear no malice to his nephews and nieces, and to have no other feeling +with regard to his betters but a constant and generous desire to dine +with them. + +Between the Marchioness and the natural and tender regard of mother for +children, there was that cruel barrier placed of difference of faith. +The very love which she might feel for her sons only served to render +the timid and pious lady more fearful and unhappy. The gulf which +separated them was fatal and impassable. She could not stretch her +weak arms across it, or draw her children over to that side away from +which her belief told her there was no safety. During the youth of his +sons, Lord Steyne, who was a good scholar and amateur casuist, had no +better sport in the evening after dinner in the country than in setting +the boys' tutor, the Reverend Mr. Trail (now my Lord Bishop of Ealing) +on her ladyship's director, Father Mole, over their wine, and in +pitting Oxford against St. Acheul. He cried "Bravo, Latimer! Well +said, Loyola!" alternately; he promised Mole a bishopric if he would +come over, and vowed he would use all his influence to get Trail a +cardinal's hat if he would secede. Neither divine allowed himself to +be conquered, and though the fond mother hoped that her youngest and +favourite son would be reconciled to her church--his mother church--a +sad and awful disappointment awaited the devout lady--a disappointment +which seemed to be a judgement upon her for the sin of her marriage. + +My Lord Gaunt married, as every person who frequents the Peerage knows, +the Lady Blanche Thistlewood, a daughter of the noble house of +Bareacres, before mentioned in this veracious history. A wing of Gaunt +House was assigned to this couple; for the head of the family chose to +govern it, and while he reigned to reign supreme; his son and heir, +however, living little at home, disagreeing with his wife, and +borrowing upon post-obits such moneys as he required beyond the very +moderate sums which his father was disposed to allow him. The Marquis +knew every shilling of his son's debts. At his lamented demise, he was +found himself to be possessor of many of his heir's bonds, purchased +for their benefit, and devised by his Lordship to the children of his +younger son. + +As, to my Lord Gaunt's dismay, and the chuckling delight of his natural +enemy and father, the Lady Gaunt had no children--the Lord George Gaunt +was desired to return from Vienna, where he was engaged in waltzing and +diplomacy, and to contract a matrimonial alliance with the Honourable +Joan, only daughter of John Johnes, First Baron Helvellyn, and head of +the firm of Jones, Brown, and Robinson, of Threadneedle Street, +Bankers; from which union sprang several sons and daughters, whose +doings do not appertain to this story. + +The marriage at first was a happy and prosperous one. My Lord George +Gaunt could not only read, but write pretty correctly. He spoke French +with considerable fluency; and was one of the finest waltzers in +Europe. With these talents, and his interest at home, there was little +doubt that his lordship would rise to the highest dignities in his +profession. The lady, his wife, felt that courts were her sphere, and +her wealth enabled her to receive splendidly in those continental towns +whither her husband's diplomatic duties led him. There was talk of +appointing him minister, and bets were laid at the Travellers' that he +would be ambassador ere long, when of a sudden, rumours arrived of the +secretary's extraordinary behaviour. At a grand diplomatic dinner given +by his chief, he had started up and declared that a pate de foie gras +was poisoned. He went to a ball at the hotel of the Bavarian envoy, +the Count de Springbock-Hohenlaufen, with his head shaved and dressed +as a Capuchin friar. It was not a masked ball, as some folks wanted to +persuade you. It was something queer, people whispered. His +grandfather was so. It was in the family. + +His wife and family returned to this country and took up their abode at +Gaunt House. Lord George gave up his post on the European continent, +and was gazetted to Brazil. But people knew better; he never returned +from that Brazil expedition--never died there--never lived there--never +was there at all. He was nowhere; he was gone out altogether. +"Brazil," said one gossip to another, with a grin--"Brazil is St. +John's Wood. Rio de Janeiro is a cottage surrounded by four walls, and +George Gaunt is accredited to a keeper, who has invested him with the +order of the Strait-Waistcoat." These are the kinds of epitaphs which +men pass over one another in Vanity Fair. + +Twice or thrice in a week, in the earliest morning, the poor mother +went for her sins and saw the poor invalid. Sometimes he laughed at her +(and his laughter was more pitiful than to hear him cry); sometimes she +found the brilliant dandy diplomatist of the Congress of Vienna +dragging about a child's toy, or nursing the keeper's baby's doll. +Sometimes he knew her and Father Mole, her director and companion; +oftener he forgot her, as he had done wife, children, love, ambition, +vanity. But he remembered his dinner-hour, and used to cry if his +wine-and-water was not strong enough. + +It was the mysterious taint of the blood; the poor mother had brought +it from her own ancient race. The evil had broken out once or twice in +the father's family, long before Lady Steyne's sins had begun, or her +fasts and tears and penances had been offered in their expiation. The +pride of the race was struck down as the first-born of Pharaoh. The +dark mark of fate and doom was on the threshold--the tall old +threshold surmounted by coronets and caned heraldry. + +The absent lord's children meanwhile prattled and grew on quite +unconscious that the doom was over them too. First they talked of +their father and devised plans against his return. Then the name of +the living dead man was less frequently in their mouth--then not +mentioned at all. But the stricken old grandmother trembled to think +that these too were the inheritors of their father's shame as well as +of his honours, and watched sickening for the day when the awful +ancestral curse should come down on them. + +This dark presentiment also haunted Lord Steyne. He tried to lay the +horrid bedside ghost in Red Seas of wine and jollity, and lost sight of +it sometimes in the crowd and rout of his pleasures. But it always +came back to him when alone, and seemed to grow more threatening with +years. "I have taken your son," it said, "why not you? I may shut you +up in a prison some day like your son George. I may tap you on the +head to-morrow, and away go pleasure and honours, feasts and beauty, +friends, flatterers, French cooks, fine horses and houses--in exchange +for a prison, a keeper, and a straw mattress like George Gaunt's." And +then my lord would defy the ghost which threatened him, for he knew of +a remedy by which he could baulk his enemy. + +So there was splendour and wealth, but no great happiness perchance, +behind the tall caned portals of Gaunt House with its smoky coronets +and ciphers. The feasts there were of the grandest in London, but +there was not overmuch content therewith, except among the guests who +sat at my lord's table. Had he not been so great a Prince very few +possibly would have visited him; but in Vanity Fair the sins of very +great personages are looked at indulgently. "Nous regardons a deux +fois" (as the French lady said) before we condemn a person of my lord's +undoubted quality. Some notorious carpers and squeamish moralists +might be sulky with Lord Steyne, but they were glad enough to come when +he asked them. + +"Lord Steyne is really too bad," Lady Slingstone said, "but everybody +goes, and of course I shall see that my girls come to no harm." "His +lordship is a man to whom I owe much, everything in life," said the +Right Reverend Doctor Trail, thinking that the Archbishop was rather +shaky, and Mrs. Trail and the young ladies would as soon have missed +going to church as to one of his lordship's parties. "His morals are +bad," said little Lord Southdown to his sister, who meekly +expostulated, having heard terrific legends from her mamma with respect +to the doings at Gaunt House; "but hang it, he's got the best dry +Sillery in Europe!" And as for Sir Pitt Crawley, Bart.--Sir Pitt that +pattern of decorum, Sir Pitt who had led off at missionary meetings--he +never for one moment thought of not going too. "Where you see such +persons as the Bishop of Ealing and the Countess of Slingstone, you may +be pretty sure, Jane," the Baronet would say, "that we cannot be wrong. +The great rank and station of Lord Steyne put him in a position to +command people in our station in life. The Lord Lieutenant of a +County, my dear, is a respectable man. Besides, George Gaunt and I +were intimate in early life; he was my junior when we were attaches at +Pumpernickel together." + +In a word everybody went to wait upon this great man--everybody who was +asked, as you the reader (do not say nay) or I the writer hereof would +go if we had an invitation. + + + +CHAPTER XLVIII + +In Which the Reader Is Introduced to the Very Best of Company + +At last Becky's kindness and attention to the chief of her husband's +family were destined to meet with an exceeding great reward, a reward +which, though certainly somewhat unsubstantial, the little woman +coveted with greater eagerness than more positive benefits. If she did +not wish to lead a virtuous life, at least she desired to enjoy a +character for virtue, and we know that no lady in the genteel world can +possess this desideratum, until she has put on a train and feathers and +has been presented to her Sovereign at Court. From that august +interview they come out stamped as honest women. The Lord Chamberlain +gives them a certificate of virtue. And as dubious goods or letters +are passed through an oven at quarantine, sprinkled with aromatic +vinegar, and then pronounced clean, many a lady, whose reputation would +be doubtful otherwise and liable to give infection, passes through the +wholesome ordeal of the Royal presence and issues from it free from all +taint. + +It might be very well for my Lady Bareacres, my Lady Tufto, Mrs. Bute +Crawley in the country, and other ladies who had come into contact with +Mrs. Rawdon Crawley to cry fie at the idea of the odious little +adventuress making her curtsey before the Sovereign, and to declare +that, if dear good Queen Charlotte had been alive, she never would have +admitted such an extremely ill-regulated personage into her chaste +drawing-room. But when we consider that it was the First Gentleman in +Europe in whose high presence Mrs. Rawdon passed her examination, and +as it were, took her degree in reputation, it surely must be flat +disloyalty to doubt any more about her virtue. I, for my part, look +back with love and awe to that Great Character in history. Ah, what a +high and noble appreciation of Gentlewomanhood there must have been in +Vanity Fair, when that revered and august being was invested, by the +universal acclaim of the refined and educated portion of this empire, +with the title of Premier Gentilhomme of his Kingdom. Do you remember, +dear M--, oh friend of my youth, how one blissful night five-and-twenty +years since, the "Hypocrite" being acted, Elliston being manager, +Dowton and Liston performers, two boys had leave from their loyal +masters to go out from Slaughter-House School where they were educated +and to appear on Drury Lane stage, amongst a crowd which assembled +there to greet the king. THE KING? There he was. Beefeaters were +before the august box; the Marquis of Steyne (Lord of the Powder +Closet) and other great officers of state were behind the chair on +which he sat, HE sat--florid of face, portly of person, covered with +orders, and in a rich curling head of hair--how we sang God save him! +How the house rocked and shouted with that magnificent music. How they +cheered, and cried, and waved handkerchiefs. Ladies wept; mothers +clasped their children; some fainted with emotion. People were +suffocated in the pit, shrieks and groans rising up amidst the writhing +and shouting mass there of his people who were, and indeed showed +themselves almost to be, ready to die for him. Yes, we saw him. Fate +cannot deprive us of THAT. Others have seen Napoleon. Some few still +exist who have beheld Frederick the Great, Doctor Johnson, Marie +Antoinette, &c.--be it our reasonable boast to our children, that we +saw George the Good, the Magnificent, the Great. + +Well, there came a happy day in Mrs. Rawdon Crawley's existence when +this angel was admitted into the paradise of a Court which she coveted, +her sister-in-law acting as her godmother. On the appointed day, Sir +Pitt and his lady, in their great family carriage (just newly built, +and ready for the Baronet's assumption of the office of High Sheriff of +his county), drove up to the little house in Curzon Street, to the +edification of Raggles, who was watching from his greengrocer's shop, +and saw fine plumes within, and enormous bunches of flowers in the +breasts of the new livery-coats of the footmen. + +Sir Pitt, in a glittering uniform, descended and went into Curzon +Street, his sword between his legs. Little Rawdon stood with his face +against the parlour window-panes, smiling and nodding with all his +might to his aunt in the carriage within; and presently Sir Pitt issued +forth from the house again, leading forth a lady with grand feathers, +covered in a white shawl, and holding up daintily a train of +magnificent brocade. She stepped into the vehicle as if she were a +princess and accustomed all her life to go to Court, smiling graciously +on the footman at the door and on Sir Pitt, who followed her into the +carriage. + +Then Rawdon followed in his old Guards' uniform, which had grown +woefully shabby, and was much too tight. He was to have followed the +procession and waited upon his sovereign in a cab, but that his +good-natured sister-in-law insisted that they should be a family party. +The coach was large, the ladies not very big, they would hold their +trains in their laps--finally, the four went fraternally together, and +their carriage presently joined the line of royal equipages which was +making its way down Piccadilly and St. James's Street, towards the old +brick palace where the Star of Brunswick was in waiting to receive his +nobles and gentlefolks. + +Becky felt as if she could bless the people out of the carriage +windows, so elated was she in spirit, and so strong a sense had she of +the dignified position which she had at last attained in life. Even our +Becky had her weaknesses, and as one often sees how men pride +themselves upon excellences which others are slow to perceive: how, for +instance, Comus firmly believes that he is the greatest tragic actor in +England; how Brown, the famous novelist, longs to be considered, not a +man of genius, but a man of fashion; while Robinson, the great lawyer, +does not in the least care about his reputation in Westminster Hall, +but believes himself incomparable across country and at a five-barred +gate--so to be, and to be thought, a respectable woman was Becky's aim +in life, and she got up the genteel with amazing assiduity, readiness, +and success. We have said, there were times when she believed herself +to be a fine lady and forgot that there was no money in the chest at +home--duns round the gate, tradesmen to coax and wheedle--no ground to +walk upon, in a word. And as she went to Court in the carriage, the +family carriage, she adopted a demeanour so grand, self-satisfied, +deliberate, and imposing that it made even Lady Jane laugh. She walked +into the royal apartments with a toss of the head which would have +befitted an empress, and I have no doubt had she been one, she would +have become the character perfectly. + +We are authorized to state that Mrs. Rawdon Crawley's costume de cour +on the occasion of her presentation to the Sovereign was of the most +elegant and brilliant description. Some ladies we may have seen--we +who wear stars and cordons and attend the St. James's assemblies, or +we, who, in muddy boots, dawdle up and down Pall Mall and peep into the +coaches as they drive up with the great folks in their feathers--some +ladies of fashion, I say, we may have seen, about two o'clock of the +forenoon of a levee day, as the laced-jacketed band of the Life Guards +are blowing triumphal marches seated on those prancing music-stools, +their cream-coloured chargers--who are by no means lovely and enticing +objects at that early period of noon. A stout countess of sixty, +decolletee, painted, wrinkled with rouge up to her drooping eyelids, +and diamonds twinkling in her wig, is a wholesome and edifying, but not +a pleasant sight. She has the faded look of a St. James's Street +illumination, as it may be seen of an early morning, when half the +lamps are out, and the others are blinking wanly, as if they were about +to vanish like ghosts before the dawn. Such charms as those of which +we catch glimpses while her ladyship's carriage passes should appear +abroad at night alone. If even Cynthia looks haggard of an afternoon, +as we may see her sometimes in the present winter season, with Phoebus +staring her out of countenance from the opposite side of the heavens, +how much more can old Lady Castlemouldy keep her head up when the sun +is shining full upon it through the chariot windows, and showing all +the chinks and crannies with which time has marked her face! No. +Drawing-rooms should be announced for November, or the first foggy day, +or the elderly sultanas of our Vanity Fair should drive up in closed +litters, descend in a covered way, and make their curtsey to the +Sovereign under the protection of lamplight. + +Our beloved Rebecca had no need, however, of any such a friendly halo +to set off her beauty. Her complexion could bear any sunshine as yet, +and her dress, though if you were to see it now, any present lady of +Vanity Fair would pronounce it to be the most foolish and preposterous +attire ever worn, was as handsome in her eyes and those of the public, +some five-and-twenty years since, as the most brilliant costume of the +most famous beauty of the present season. A score of years hence that +too, that milliner's wonder, will have passed into the domain of the +absurd, along with all previous vanities. But we are wandering too +much. Mrs. Rawdon's dress was pronounced to be charmante on the +eventful day of her presentation. Even good little Lady Jane was forced +to acknowledge this effect, as she looked at her kinswoman, and owned +sorrowfully to herself that she was quite inferior in taste to Mrs. +Becky. + +She did not know how much care, thought, and genius Mrs. Rawdon had +bestowed upon that garment. Rebecca had as good taste as any milliner +in Europe, and such a clever way of doing things as Lady Jane little +understood. The latter quickly spied out the magnificence of the +brocade of Becky's train, and the splendour of the lace on her dress. + +The brocade was an old remnant, Becky said; and as for the lace, it was +a great bargain. She had had it these hundred years. + +"My dear Mrs. Crawley, it must have cost a little fortune," Lady Jane +said, looking down at her own lace, which was not nearly so good; and +then examining the quality of the ancient brocade which formed the +material of Mrs. Rawdon's Court dress, she felt inclined to say that +she could not afford such fine clothing, but checked that speech, with +an effort, as one uncharitable to her kinswoman. + +And yet, if Lady Jane had known all, I think even her kindly temper +would have failed her. The fact is, when she was putting Sir Pitt's +house in order, Mrs. Rawdon had found the lace and the brocade in old +wardrobes, the property of the former ladies of the house, and had +quietly carried the goods home, and had suited them to her own little +person. Briggs saw her take them, asked no questions, told no stories; +but I believe quite sympathised with her on this matter, and so would +many another honest woman. + +And the diamonds--"Where the doose did you get the diamonds, Becky?" +said her husband, admiring some jewels which he had never seen before +and which sparkled in her ears and on her neck with brilliance and +profusion. + +Becky blushed a little and looked at him hard for a moment. Pitt +Crawley blushed a little too, and looked out of window. The fact is, +he had given her a very small portion of the brilliants; a pretty +diamond clasp, which confined a pearl necklace which she wore--and the +Baronet had omitted to mention the circumstance to his lady. + +Becky looked at her husband, and then at Sir Pitt, with an air of saucy +triumph--as much as to say, "Shall I betray you?" + +"Guess!" she said to her husband. "Why, you silly man," she continued, +"where do you suppose I got them?--all except the little clasp, which a +dear friend of mine gave me long ago. I hired them, to be sure. I +hired them at Mr. Polonius's, in Coventry Street. You don't suppose +that all the diamonds which go to Court belong to the wearers; like +those beautiful stones which Lady Jane has, and which are much +handsomer than any which I have, I am certain." + +"They are family jewels," said Sir Pitt, again looking uneasy. And in +this family conversation the carriage rolled down the street, until its +cargo was finally discharged at the gates of the palace where the +Sovereign was sitting in state. + +The diamonds, which had created Rawdon's admiration, never went back to +Mr. Polonius, of Coventry Street, and that gentleman never applied for +their restoration, but they retired into a little private repository, +in an old desk, which Amelia Sedley had given her years and years ago, +and in which Becky kept a number of useful and, perhaps, valuable +things, about which her husband knew nothing. To know nothing, or +little, is in the nature of some husbands. To hide, in the nature of +how many women? Oh, ladies! how many of you have surreptitious +milliners' bills? How many of you have gowns and bracelets which you +daren't show, or which you wear trembling?--trembling, and coaxing +with smiles the husband by your side, who does not know the new velvet +gown from the old one, or the new bracelet from last year's, or has any +notion that the ragged-looking yellow lace scarf cost forty guineas and +that Madame Bobinot is writing dunning letters every week for the money! + +Thus Rawdon knew nothing about the brilliant diamond ear-rings, or the +superb brilliant ornament which decorated the fair bosom of his lady; +but Lord Steyne, who was in his place at Court, as Lord of the Powder +Closet, and one of the great dignitaries and illustrious defences of +the throne of England, and came up with all his stars, garters, +collars, and cordons, and paid particular attention to the little +woman, knew whence the jewels came and who paid for them. + +As he bowed over her he smiled, and quoted the hackneyed and beautiful +lines from The Rape of the Lock about Belinda's diamonds, "which Jews +might kiss and infidels adore." + +"But I hope your lordship is orthodox," said the little lady with a +toss of her head. And many ladies round about whispered and talked, +and many gentlemen nodded and whispered, as they saw what marked +attention the great nobleman was paying to the little adventuress. + +What were the circumstances of the interview between Rebecca Crawley, +nee Sharp, and her Imperial Master, it does not become such a feeble +and inexperienced pen as mine to attempt to relate. The dazzled eyes +close before that Magnificent Idea. Loyal respect and decency tell +even the imagination not to look too keenly and audaciously about the +sacred audience-chamber, but to back away rapidly, silently, and +respectfully, making profound bows out of the August Presence. + +This may be said, that in all London there was no more loyal heart than +Becky's after this interview. The name of her king was always on her +lips, and he was proclaimed by her to be the most charming of men. She +went to Colnaghi's and ordered the finest portrait of him that art had +produced, and credit could supply. She chose that famous one in which +the best of monarchs is represented in a frock-coat with a fur collar, +and breeches and silk stockings, simpering on a sofa from under his +curly brown wig. She had him painted in a brooch and wore it--indeed +she amused and somewhat pestered her acquaintance with her perpetual +talk about his urbanity and beauty. Who knows! Perhaps the little +woman thought she might play the part of a Maintenon or a Pompadour. + +But the finest sport of all after her presentation was to hear her talk +virtuously. She had a few female acquaintances, not, it must be owned, +of the very highest reputation in Vanity Fair. But being made an +honest woman of, so to speak, Becky would not consort any longer with +these dubious ones, and cut Lady Crackenbury when the latter nodded to +her from her opera-box, and gave Mrs. Washington White the go-by in the +Ring. "One must, my dear, show one is somebody," she said. "One +mustn't be seen with doubtful people. I pity Lady Crackenbury from my +heart, and Mrs. Washington White may be a very good-natured person. +YOU may go and dine with them, as you like your rubber. But I mustn't, +and won't; and you will have the goodness to tell Smith to say I am not +at home when either of them calls." + +The particulars of Becky's costume were in the newspapers--feathers, +lappets, superb diamonds, and all the rest. Lady Crackenbury read the +paragraph in bitterness of spirit and discoursed to her followers about +the airs which that woman was giving herself. Mrs. Bute Crawley and +her young ladies in the country had a copy of the Morning Post from +town, and gave a vent to their honest indignation. "If you had been +sandy-haired, green-eyed, and a French rope-dancer's daughter," Mrs. +Bute said to her eldest girl (who, on the contrary, was a very swarthy, +short, and snub-nosed young lady), "You might have had superb diamonds +forsooth, and have been presented at Court by your cousin, the Lady +Jane. But you're only a gentlewoman, my poor dear child. You have +only some of the best blood in England in your veins, and good +principles and piety for your portion. I, myself, the wife of a +Baronet's younger brother, too, never thought of such a thing as going +to Court--nor would other people, if good Queen Charlotte had been +alive." In this way the worthy Rectoress consoled herself, and her +daughters sighed and sat over the Peerage all night. + +A few days after the famous presentation, another great and exceeding +honour was vouchsafed to the virtuous Becky. Lady Steyne's carriage +drove up to Mr. Rawdon Crawley's door, and the footman, instead of +driving down the front of the house, as by his tremendous knocking he +appeared to be inclined to do, relented and only delivered in a couple +of cards, on which were engraven the names of the Marchioness of Steyne +and the Countess of Gaunt. If these bits of pasteboard had been +beautiful pictures, or had had a hundred yards of Malines lace rolled +round them, worth twice the number of guineas, Becky could not have +regarded them with more pleasure. You may be sure they occupied a +conspicuous place in the china bowl on the drawing-room table, where +Becky kept the cards of her visitors. Lord! lord! how poor Mrs. +Washington White's card and Lady Crackenbury's card--which our little +friend had been glad enough to get a few months back, and of which the +silly little creature was rather proud once--Lord! lord! I say, how +soon at the appearance of these grand court cards, did those poor +little neglected deuces sink down to the bottom of the pack. Steyne! +Bareacres, Johnes of Helvellyn! and Caerylon of Camelot! we may be +sure that Becky and Briggs looked out those august names in the +Peerage, and followed the noble races up through all the ramifications +of the family tree. + +My Lord Steyne coming to call a couple of hours afterwards, and looking +about him, and observing everything as was his wont, found his ladies' +cards already ranged as the trumps of Becky's hand, and grinned, as +this old cynic always did at any naive display of human weakness. +Becky came down to him presently; whenever the dear girl expected his +lordship, her toilette was prepared, her hair in perfect order, her +mouchoirs, aprons, scarfs, little morocco slippers, and other female +gimcracks arranged, and she seated in some artless and agreeable +posture ready to receive him--whenever she was surprised, of course, +she had to fly to her apartment to take a rapid survey of matters in +the glass, and to trip down again to wait upon the great peer. + +She found him grinning over the bowl. She was discovered, and she +blushed a little. "Thank you, Monseigneur," she said. "You see your +ladies have been here. How good of you! I couldn't come before--I was +in the kitchen making a pudding." + +"I know you were, I saw you through the area-railings as I drove up," +replied the old gentleman. + +"You see everything," she replied. + +"A few things, but not that, my pretty lady," he said good-naturedly. +"You silly little fibster! I heard you in the room overhead, where I +have no doubt you were putting a little rouge on--you must give some +of yours to my Lady Gaunt, whose complexion is quite preposterous--and +I heard the bedroom door open, and then you came downstairs." + +"Is it a crime to try and look my best when YOU come here?" answered +Mrs. Rawdon plaintively, and she rubbed her cheek with her handkerchief +as if to show there was no rouge at all, only genuine blushes and +modesty in her case. About this who can tell? I know there is some +rouge that won't come off on a pocket-handkerchief, and some so good +that even tears will not disturb it. + +"Well," said the old gentleman, twiddling round his wife's card, "you +are bent on becoming a fine lady. You pester my poor old life out to +get you into the world. You won't be able to hold your own there, you +silly little fool. You've got no money." + +"You will get us a place," interposed Becky, "as quick as possible." + +"You've got no money, and you want to compete with those who have. You +poor little earthenware pipkin, you want to swim down the stream along +with the great copper kettles. All women are alike. Everybody is +striving for what is not worth the having! Gad! I dined with the King +yesterday, and we had neck of mutton and turnips. A dinner of herbs is +better than a stalled ox very often. You will go to Gaunt House. You +give an old fellow no rest until you get there. It's not half so nice +as here. You'll be bored there. I am. My wife is as gay as Lady +Macbeth, and my daughters as cheerful as Regan and Goneril. I daren't +sleep in what they call my bedroom. The bed is like the baldaquin of +St. Peter's, and the pictures frighten me. I have a little brass bed +in a dressing-room, and a little hair mattress like an anchorite. I am +an anchorite. Ho! ho! You'll be asked to dinner next week. And gare +aux femmes, look out and hold your own! How the women will bully you!" +This was a very long speech for a man of few words like my Lord Steyne; +nor was it the first which he uttered for Becky's benefit on that day. + +Briggs looked up from the work-table at which she was seated in the +farther room and gave a deep sigh as she heard the great Marquis speak +so lightly of her sex. + +"If you don't turn off that abominable sheep-dog," said Lord Steyne, +with a savage look over his shoulder at her, "I will have her poisoned." + +"I always give my dog dinner from my own plate," said Rebecca, laughing +mischievously; and having enjoyed for some time the discomfiture of my +lord, who hated poor Briggs for interrupting his tete-a-tete with the +fair Colonel's wife, Mrs. Rawdon at length had pity upon her admirer, +and calling to Briggs, praised the fineness of the weather to her and +bade her to take out the child for a walk. + +"I can't send her away," Becky said presently, after a pause, and in a +very sad voice. Her eyes filled with tears as she spoke, and she +turned away her head. + +"You owe her her wages, I suppose?" said the Peer. + +"Worse than that," said Becky, still casting down her eyes; "I have +ruined her." + +"Ruined her? Then why don't you turn her out?" the gentleman asked. + +"Men do that," Becky answered bitterly. "Women are not so bad as you. +Last year, when we were reduced to our last guinea, she gave us +everything. She shall never leave me, until we are ruined utterly +ourselves, which does not seem far off, or until I can pay her the +utmost farthing." + +"------ it, how much is it?" said the Peer with an oath. And Becky, +reflecting on the largeness of his means, mentioned not only the sum +which she had borrowed from Miss Briggs, but one of nearly double the +amount. + +This caused the Lord Steyne to break out in another brief and energetic +expression of anger, at which Rebecca held down her head the more and +cried bitterly. "I could not help it. It was my only chance. I dare +not tell my husband. He would kill me if I told him what I have done. +I have kept it a secret from everybody but you--and you forced it from +me. Ah, what shall I do, Lord Steyne? for I am very, very unhappy!" + +Lord Steyne made no reply except by beating the devil's tattoo and +biting his nails. At last he clapped his hat on his head and flung out +of the room. Rebecca did not rise from her attitude of misery until +the door slammed upon him and his carriage whirled away. Then she rose +up with the queerest expression of victorious mischief glittering in +her green eyes. She burst out laughing once or twice to herself, as +she sat at work, and sitting down to the piano, she rattled away a +triumphant voluntary on the keys, which made the people pause under her +window to listen to her brilliant music. + +That night, there came two notes from Gaunt House for the little woman, +the one containing a card of invitation from Lord and Lady Steyne to a +dinner at Gaunt House next Friday, while the other enclosed a slip of +gray paper bearing Lord Steyne's signature and the address of Messrs. +Jones, Brown, and Robinson, Lombard Street. + +Rawdon heard Becky laughing in the night once or twice. It was only +her delight at going to Gaunt House and facing the ladies there, she +said, which amused her so. But the truth was that she was occupied +with a great number of other thoughts. Should she pay off old Briggs +and give her her conge? Should she astonish Raggles by settling his +account? She turned over all these thoughts on her pillow, and on the +next day, when Rawdon went out to pay his morning visit to the Club, +Mrs. Crawley (in a modest dress with a veil on) whipped off in a +hackney-coach to the City: and being landed at Messrs. Jones and +Robinson's bank, presented a document there to the authority at the +desk, who, in reply, asked her "How she would take it?" + +She gently said "she would take a hundred and fifty pounds in small +notes and the remainder in one note": and passing through St. Paul's +Churchyard stopped there and bought the handsomest black silk gown for +Briggs which money could buy; and which, with a kiss and the kindest +speeches, she presented to the simple old spinster. + +Then she walked to Mr. Raggles, inquired about his children +affectionately, and gave him fifty pounds on account. Then she went to +the livery-man from whom she jobbed her carriages and gratified him +with a similar sum. "And I hope this will be a lesson to you, Spavin," +she said, "and that on the next drawing-room day my brother, Sir Pitt, +will not be inconvenienced by being obliged to take four of us in his +carriage to wait upon His Majesty, because my own carriage is not +forthcoming." It appears there had been a difference on the last +drawing-room day. Hence the degradation which the Colonel had almost +suffered, of being obliged to enter the presence of his Sovereign in a +hack cab. + +These arrangements concluded, Becky paid a visit upstairs to the +before-mentioned desk, which Amelia Sedley had given her years and +years ago, and which contained a number of useful and valuable little +things--in which private museum she placed the one note which Messrs. +Jones and Robinson's cashier had given her. + + + +CHAPTER XLIX + +In Which We Enjoy Three Courses and a Dessert + +When the ladies of Gaunt House were at breakfast that morning, Lord +Steyne (who took his chocolate in private and seldom disturbed the +females of his household, or saw them except upon public days, or when +they crossed each other in the hall, or when from his pit-box at the +opera he surveyed them in their box on the grand tier) his lordship, we +say, appeared among the ladies and the children who were assembled over +the tea and toast, and a battle royal ensued apropos of Rebecca. + +"My Lady Steyne," he said, "I want to see the list for your dinner on +Friday; and I want you, if you please, to write a card for Colonel and +Mrs. Crawley." + +"Blanche writes them," Lady Steyne said in a flutter. "Lady Gaunt +writes them." + +"I will not write to that person," Lady Gaunt said, a tall and stately +lady, who looked up for an instant and then down again after she had +spoken. It was not good to meet Lord Steyne's eyes for those who had +offended him. + +"Send the children out of the room. Go!" said he pulling at the +bell-rope. The urchins, always frightened before him, retired: their +mother would have followed too. "Not you," he said. "You stop." + +"My Lady Steyne," he said, "once more will you have the goodness to go +to the desk and write that card for your dinner on Friday?" + +"My Lord, I will not be present at it," Lady Gaunt said; "I will go +home." + +"I wish you would, and stay there. You will find the bailiffs at +Bareacres very pleasant company, and I shall be freed from lending +money to your relations and from your own damned tragedy airs. Who are +you to give orders here? You have no money. You've got no brains. You +were here to have children, and you have not had any. Gaunt's tired of +you, and George's wife is the only person in the family who doesn't +wish you were dead. Gaunt would marry again if you were." + +"I wish I were," her Ladyship answered with tears and rage in her eyes. + +"You, forsooth, must give yourself airs of virtue, while my wife, who +is an immaculate saint, as everybody knows, and never did wrong in her +life, has no objection to meet my young friend Mrs. Crawley. My Lady +Steyne knows that appearances are sometimes against the best of women; +that lies are often told about the most innocent of them. Pray, madam, +shall I tell you some little anecdotes about my Lady Bareacres, your +mamma?" + +"You may strike me if you like, sir, or hit any cruel blow," Lady Gaunt +said. To see his wife and daughter suffering always put his Lordship +into a good humour. + +"My sweet Blanche," he said, "I am a gentleman, and never lay my hand +upon a woman, save in the way of kindness. I only wish to correct +little faults in your character. You women are too proud, and sadly +lack humility, as Father Mole, I'm sure, would tell my Lady Steyne if +he were here. You mustn't give yourselves airs; you must be meek and +humble, my blessings. For all Lady Steyne knows, this calumniated, +simple, good-humoured Mrs. Crawley is quite innocent--even more +innocent than herself. Her husband's character is not good, but it is +as good as Bareacres', who has played a little and not paid a great +deal, who cheated you out of the only legacy you ever had and left you +a pauper on my hands. And Mrs. Crawley is not very well-born, but she +is not worse than Fanny's illustrious ancestor, the first de la Jones." + +"The money which I brought into the family, sir," Lady George cried +out-- + +"You purchased a contingent reversion with it," the Marquis said +darkly. "If Gaunt dies, your husband may come to his honours; your +little boys may inherit them, and who knows what besides? In the +meanwhile, ladies, be as proud and virtuous as you like abroad, but +don't give ME any airs. As for Mrs. Crawley's character, I shan't +demean myself or that most spotless and perfectly irreproachable lady +by even hinting that it requires a defence. You will be pleased to +receive her with the utmost cordiality, as you will receive all persons +whom I present in this house. This house?" He broke out with a laugh. +"Who is the master of it? and what is it? This Temple of Virtue belongs +to me. And if I invite all Newgate or all Bedlam here, by ------ they +shall be welcome." + +After this vigorous allocution, to one of which sort Lord Steyne +treated his "Hareem" whenever symptoms of insubordination appeared in +his household, the crestfallen women had nothing for it but to obey. +Lady Gaunt wrote the invitation which his Lordship required, and she +and her mother-in-law drove in person, and with bitter and humiliated +hearts, to leave the cards on Mrs. Rawdon, the reception of which +caused that innocent woman so much pleasure. + +There were families in London who would have sacrificed a year's income +to receive such an honour at the hands of those great ladies. Mrs. +Frederick Bullock, for instance, would have gone on her knees from May +Fair to Lombard Street, if Lady Steyne and Lady Gaunt had been waiting +in the City to raise her up and say, "Come to us next Friday"--not to +one of the great crushes and grand balls of Gaunt House, whither +everybody went, but to the sacred, unapproachable, mysterious, +delicious entertainments, to be admitted to one of which was a +privilege, and an honour, and a blessing indeed. + +Severe, spotless, and beautiful, Lady Gaunt held the very highest rank +in Vanity Fair. The distinguished courtesy with which Lord Steyne +treated her charmed everybody who witnessed his behaviour, caused the +severest critics to admit how perfect a gentleman he was, and to own +that his Lordship's heart at least was in the right place. + +The ladies of Gaunt House called Lady Bareacres in to their aid, in +order to repulse the common enemy. One of Lady Gaunt's carriages went +to Hill Street for her Ladyship's mother, all whose equipages were in +the hands of the bailiffs, whose very jewels and wardrobe, it was said, +had been seized by those inexorable Israelites. Bareacres Castle was +theirs, too, with all its costly pictures, furniture, and articles of +vertu--the magnificent Vandykes; the noble Reynolds pictures; the +Lawrence portraits, tawdry and beautiful, and, thirty years ago, deemed +as precious as works of real genius; the matchless Dancing Nymph of +Canova, for which Lady Bareacres had sat in her youth--Lady Bareacres +splendid then, and radiant in wealth, rank, and beauty--a toothless, +bald, old woman now--a mere rag of a former robe of state. Her lord, +painted at the same time by Lawrence, as waving his sabre in front of +Bareacres Castle, and clothed in his uniform as Colonel of the +Thistlewood Yeomanry, was a withered, old, lean man in a greatcoat and +a Brutus wig, slinking about Gray's Inn of mornings chiefly and dining +alone at clubs. He did not like to dine with Steyne now. They had run +races of pleasure together in youth when Bareacres was the winner. But +Steyne had more bottom than he and had lasted him out. The Marquis was +ten times a greater man now than the young Lord Gaunt of '85, and +Bareacres nowhere in the race--old, beaten, bankrupt, and broken down. +He had borrowed too much money of Steyne to find it pleasant to meet +his old comrade often. The latter, whenever he wished to be merry, +used jeeringly to ask Lady Gaunt why her father had not come to see +her. "He has not been here for four months," Lord Steyne would say. "I +can always tell by my cheque-book afterwards, when I get a visit from +Bareacres. What a comfort it is, my ladies, I bank with one of my +sons' fathers-in-law, and the other banks with me!" + +Of the other illustrious persons whom Becky had the honour to encounter +on this her first presentation to the grand world, it does not become +the present historian to say much. There was his Excellency the Prince +of Peterwaradin, with his Princess--a nobleman tightly girthed, with a +large military chest, on which the plaque of his order shone +magnificently, and wearing the red collar of the Golden Fleece round +his neck. He was the owner of countless flocks. "Look at his face. I +think he must be descended from a sheep," Becky whispered to Lord +Steyne. Indeed, his Excellency's countenance, long, solemn, and white, +with the ornament round his neck, bore some resemblance to that of a +venerable bell-wether. + +There was Mr. John Paul Jefferson Jones, titularly attached to the +American Embassy and correspondent of the New York Demagogue, who, by +way of making himself agreeable to the company, asked Lady Steyne, +during a pause in the conversation at dinner, how his dear friend, +George Gaunt, liked the Brazils? He and George had been most intimate +at Naples and had gone up Vesuvius together. Mr. Jones wrote a full +and particular account of the dinner, which appeared duly in the +Demagogue. He mentioned the names and titles of all the guests, giving +biographical sketches of the principal people. He described the +persons of the ladies with great eloquence; the service of the table; +the size and costume of the servants; enumerated the dishes and wines +served; the ornaments of the sideboard; and the probable value of the +plate. Such a dinner he calculated could not be dished up under +fifteen or eighteen dollars per head. And he was in the habit, until +very lately, of sending over proteges, with letters of recommendation +to the present Marquis of Steyne, encouraged to do so by the intimate +terms on which he had lived with his dear friend, the late lord. He +was most indignant that a young and insignificant aristocrat, the Earl +of Southdown, should have taken the pas of him in their procession to +the dining-room. "Just as I was stepping up to offer my hand to a +very pleasing and witty fashionable, the brilliant and exclusive Mrs. +Rawdon Crawley,"--he wrote--"the young patrician interposed between me +and the lady and whisked my Helen off without a word of apology. I was +fain to bring up the rear with the Colonel, the lady's husband, a stout +red-faced warrior who distinguished himself at Waterloo, where he had +better luck than befell some of his brother redcoats at New Orleans." + +The Colonel's countenance on coming into this polite society wore as +many blushes as the face of a boy of sixteen assumes when he is +confronted with his sister's schoolfellows. It has been told before +that honest Rawdon had not been much used at any period of his life to +ladies' company. With the men at the Club or the mess room, he was +well enough; and could ride, bet, smoke, or play at billiards with the +boldest of them. He had had his time for female friendships too, but +that was twenty years ago, and the ladies were of the rank of those +with whom Young Marlow in the comedy is represented as having been +familiar before he became abashed in the presence of Miss Hardcastle. +The times are such that one scarcely dares to allude to that kind of +company which thousands of our young men in Vanity Fair are frequenting +every day, which nightly fills casinos and dancing-rooms, which is +known to exist as well as the Ring in Hyde Park or the Congregation at +St. James's--but which the most squeamish if not the most moral of +societies is determined to ignore. In a word, although Colonel Crawley +was now five-and-forty years of age, it had not been his lot in life to +meet with a half dozen good women, besides his paragon of a wife. All +except her and his kind sister Lady Jane, whose gentle nature had tamed +and won him, scared the worthy Colonel, and on occasion of his first +dinner at Gaunt House he was not heard to make a single remark except +to state that the weather was very hot. Indeed Becky would have left +him at home, but that virtue ordained that her husband should be by her +side to protect the timid and fluttering little creature on her first +appearance in polite society. + +On her first appearance Lord Steyne stepped forward, taking her hand, +and greeting her with great courtesy, and presenting her to Lady +Steyne, and their ladyships, her daughters. Their ladyships made three +stately curtsies, and the elder lady to be sure gave her hand to the +newcomer, but it was as cold and lifeless as marble. + +Becky took it, however, with grateful humility, and performing a +reverence which would have done credit to the best dancer-master, put +herself at Lady Steyne's feet, as it were, by saying that his Lordship +had been her father's earliest friend and patron, and that she, Becky, +had learned to honour and respect the Steyne family from the days of +her childhood. The fact is that Lord Steyne had once purchased a +couple of pictures of the late Sharp, and the affectionate orphan could +never forget her gratitude for that favour. + +The Lady Bareacres then came under Becky's cognizance--to whom the +Colonel's lady made also a most respectful obeisance: it was returned +with severe dignity by the exalted person in question. + +"I had the pleasure of making your Ladyship's acquaintance at Brussels, +ten years ago," Becky said in the most winning manner. "I had the good +fortune to meet Lady Bareacres at the Duchess of Richmond's ball, the +night before the Battle of Waterloo. And I recollect your Ladyship, +and my Lady Blanche, your daughter, sitting in the carriage in the +porte-cochere at the Inn, waiting for horses. I hope your Ladyship's +diamonds are safe." + +Everybody's eyes looked into their neighbour's. The famous diamonds +had undergone a famous seizure, it appears, about which Becky, of +course, knew nothing. Rawdon Crawley retreated with Lord Southdown into +a window, where the latter was heard to laugh immoderately, as Rawdon +told him the story of Lady Bareacres wanting horses and "knuckling down +by Jove," to Mrs. Crawley. "I think I needn't be afraid of THAT +woman," Becky thought. Indeed, Lady Bareacres exchanged terrified and +angry looks with her daughter and retreated to a table, where she began +to look at pictures with great energy. + +When the Potentate from the Danube made his appearance, the +conversation was carried on in the French language, and the Lady +Bareacres and the younger ladies found, to their farther mortification, +that Mrs. Crawley was much better acquainted with that tongue, and +spoke it with a much better accent than they. Becky had met other +Hungarian magnates with the army in France in 1816-17. She asked after +her friends with great interest. The foreign personages thought that she +was a lady of great distinction, and the Prince and the Princess asked +severally of Lord Steyne and the Marchioness, whom they conducted to +dinner, who was that petite dame who spoke so well? + +Finally, the procession being formed in the order described by the +American diplomatist, they marched into the apartment where the banquet +was served, and which, as I have promised the reader he shall enjoy it, +he shall have the liberty of ordering himself so as to suit his fancy. + +But it was when the ladies were alone that Becky knew the tug of war +would come. And then indeed the little woman found herself in such a +situation as made her acknowledge the correctness of Lord Steyne's +caution to her to beware of the society of ladies above her own sphere. +As they say, the persons who hate Irishmen most are Irishmen; so, +assuredly, the greatest tyrants over women are women. When poor little +Becky, alone with the ladies, went up to the fire-place whither the +great ladies had repaired, the great ladies marched away and took +possession of a table of drawings. When Becky followed them to the +table of drawings, they dropped off one by one to the fire again. She +tried to speak to one of the children (of whom she was commonly fond in +public places), but Master George Gaunt was called away by his mamma; +and the stranger was treated with such cruelty finally, that even Lady +Steyne herself pitied her and went up to speak to the friendless little +woman. + +"Lord Steyne," said her Ladyship, as her wan cheeks glowed with a +blush, "says you sing and play very beautifully, Mrs. Crawley--I wish +you would do me the kindness to sing to me." + +"I will do anything that may give pleasure to my Lord Steyne or to +you," said Rebecca, sincerely grateful, and seating herself at the +piano, began to sing. + +She sang religious songs of Mozart, which had been early favourites of +Lady Steyne, and with such sweetness and tenderness that the lady, +lingering round the piano, sat down by its side and listened until the +tears rolled down her eyes. It is true that the opposition ladies at +the other end of the room kept up a loud and ceaseless buzzing and +talking, but the Lady Steyne did not hear those rumours. She was a +child again--and had wandered back through a forty years' wilderness to +her convent garden. The chapel organ had pealed the same tones, the +organist, the sister whom she loved best of the community, had taught +them to her in those early happy days. She was a girl once more, and +the brief period of her happiness bloomed out again for an hour--she +started when the jarring doors were flung open, and with a loud laugh +from Lord Steyne, the men of the party entered full of gaiety. + +He saw at a glance what had happened in his absence, and was grateful +to his wife for once. He went and spoke to her, and called her by her +Christian name, so as again to bring blushes to her pale face--"My wife +says you have been singing like an angel," he said to Becky. Now there +are angels of two kinds, and both sorts, it is said, are charming in +their way. + +Whatever the previous portion of the evening had been, the rest of that +night was a great triumph for Becky. She sang her very best, and it +was so good that every one of the men came and crowded round the piano. +The women, her enemies, were left quite alone. And Mr. Paul Jefferson +Jones thought he had made a conquest of Lady Gaunt by going up to her +Ladyship and praising her delightful friend's first-rate singing. + + + +CHAPTER L + +Contains a Vulgar Incident + +The Muse, whoever she be, who presides over this Comic History must now +descend from the genteel heights in which she has been soaring and have +the goodness to drop down upon the lowly roof of John Sedley at +Brompton, and describe what events are taking place there. Here, too, +in this humble tenement, live care, and distrust, and dismay. Mrs. +Clapp in the kitchen is grumbling in secret to her husband about the +rent, and urging the good fellow to rebel against his old friend and +patron and his present lodger. Mrs. Sedley has ceased to visit her +landlady in the lower regions now, and indeed is in a position to +patronize Mrs. Clapp no longer. How can one be condescending to a lady +to whom one owes a matter of forty pounds, and who is perpetually +throwing out hints for the money? The Irish maidservant has not altered +in the least in her kind and respectful behaviour; but Mrs. Sedley +fancies that she is growing insolent and ungrateful, and, as the guilty +thief who fears each bush an officer, sees threatening innuendoes and +hints of capture in all the girl's speeches and answers. Miss Clapp, +grown quite a young woman now, is declared by the soured old lady to be +an unbearable and impudent little minx. Why Amelia can be so fond of +her, or have her in her room so much, or walk out with her so +constantly, Mrs. Sedley cannot conceive. The bitterness of poverty has +poisoned the life of the once cheerful and kindly woman. She is +thankless for Amelia's constant and gentle bearing towards her; carps +at her for her efforts at kindness or service; rails at her for her +silly pride in her child and her neglect of her parents. Georgy's +house is not a very lively one since Uncle Jos's annuity has been +withdrawn and the little family are almost upon famine diet. + +Amelia thinks, and thinks, and racks her brain, to find some means of +increasing the small pittance upon which the household is starving. +Can she give lessons in anything? paint card-racks? do fine work? She +finds that women are working hard, and better than she can, for +twopence a day. She buys a couple of begilt Bristol boards at the +Fancy Stationer's and paints her very best upon them--a shepherd with +a red waistcoat on one, and a pink face smiling in the midst of a +pencil landscape--a shepherdess on the other, crossing a little bridge, +with a little dog, nicely shaded. The man of the Fancy Repository and +Brompton Emporium of Fine Arts (of whom she bought the screens, vainly +hoping that he would repurchase them when ornamented by her hand) can +hardly hide the sneer with which he examines these feeble works of art. +He looks askance at the lady who waits in the shop, and ties up the +cards again in their envelope of whitey-brown paper, and hands them to +the poor widow and Miss Clapp, who had never seen such beautiful things +in her life, and had been quite confident that the man must give at +least two guineas for the screens. They try at other shops in the +interior of London, with faint sickening hopes. "Don't want 'em," says +one. "Be off," says another fiercely. Three-and-sixpence has been +spent in vain--the screens retire to Miss Clapp's bedroom, who +persists in thinking them lovely. + +She writes out a little card in her neatest hand, and after long +thought and labour of composition, in which the public is informed that +"A Lady who has some time at her disposal, wishes to undertake the +education of some little girls, whom she would instruct in English, in +French, in Geography, in History, and in Music--address A. O., at Mr. +Brown's"; and she confides the card to the gentleman of the Fine Art +Repository, who consents to allow it to lie upon the counter, where it +grows dingy and fly-blown. Amelia passes the door wistfully many a +time, in hopes that Mr. Brown will have some news to give her, but he +never beckons her in. When she goes to make little purchases, there is +no news for her. Poor simple lady, tender and weak--how are you to +battle with the struggling violent world? + +She grows daily more care-worn and sad, fixing upon her child alarmed +eyes, whereof the little boy cannot interpret the expression. She +starts up of a night and peeps into his room stealthily, to see that he +is sleeping and not stolen away. She sleeps but little now. A +constant thought and terror is haunting her. How she weeps and prays +in the long silent nights--how she tries to hide from herself the +thought which will return to her, that she ought to part with the boy, +that she is the only barrier between him and prosperity. She can't, +she can't. Not now, at least. Some other day. Oh! it is too hard to +think of and to bear. + +A thought comes over her which makes her blush and turn from +herself--her parents might keep the annuity--the curate would marry her +and give a home to her and the boy. But George's picture and dearest +memory are there to rebuke her. Shame and love say no to the +sacrifice. She shrinks from it as from something unholy, and such +thoughts never found a resting-place in that pure and gentle bosom. + +The combat, which we describe in a sentence or two, lasted for many +weeks in poor Amelia's heart, during which she had no confidante; +indeed, she could never have one, as she would not allow to herself the +possibility of yielding, though she was giving way daily before the +enemy with whom she had to battle. One truth after another was +marshalling itself silently against her and keeping its ground. Poverty +and misery for all, want and degradation for her parents, injustice to +the boy--one by one the outworks of the little citadel were taken, in +which the poor soul passionately guarded her only love and treasure. + +At the beginning of the struggle, she had written off a letter of +tender supplication to her brother at Calcutta, imploring him not to +withdraw the support which he had granted to their parents and painting +in terms of artless pathos their lonely and hapless condition. She did +not know the truth of the matter. The payment of Jos's annuity was +still regular, but it was a money-lender in the City who was receiving +it: old Sedley had sold it for a sum of money wherewith to prosecute +his bootless schemes. Emmy was calculating eagerly the time that would +elapse before the letter would arrive and be answered. She had written +down the date in her pocket-book of the day when she dispatched it. To +her son's guardian, the good Major at Madras, she had not communicated +any of her griefs and perplexities. She had not written to him since +she wrote to congratulate him on his approaching marriage. She thought +with sickening despondency, that that friend--the only one, the one who +had felt such a regard for her--was fallen away. + +One day, when things had come to a very bad pass--when the creditors +were pressing, the mother in hysteric grief, the father in more than +usual gloom, the inmates of the family avoiding each other, each +secretly oppressed with his private unhappiness and notion of +wrong--the father and daughter happened to be left alone together, and +Amelia thought to comfort her father by telling him what she had done. +She had written to Joseph--an answer must come in three or four months. +He was always generous, though careless. He could not refuse, when he +knew how straitened were the circumstances of his parents. + +Then the poor old gentleman revealed the whole truth to her--that his +son was still paying the annuity, which his own imprudence had flung +away. He had not dared to tell it sooner. He thought Amelia's ghastly +and terrified look, when, with a trembling, miserable voice he made the +confession, conveyed reproaches to him for his concealment. "Ah!" said +he with quivering lips and turning away, "you despise your old father +now!" + +"Oh, papa! it is not that," Amelia cried out, falling on his neck and +kissing him many times. "You are always good and kind. You did it for +the best. It is not for the money--it is--my God! my God! have mercy +upon me, and give me strength to bear this trial"; and she kissed him +again wildly and went away. + +Still the father did not know what that explanation meant, and the +burst of anguish with which the poor girl left him. It was that she +was conquered. The sentence was passed. The child must go from +her--to others--to forget her. Her heart and her treasure--her joy, +hope, love, worship--her God, almost! She must give him up, and +then--and then she would go to George, and they would watch over the +child and wait for him until he came to them in Heaven. + +She put on her bonnet, scarcely knowing what she did, and went out to +walk in the lanes by which George used to come back from school, and +where she was in the habit of going on his return to meet the boy. It +was May, a half-holiday. The leaves were all coming out, the weather +was brilliant; the boy came running to her flushed with health, +singing, his bundle of school-books hanging by a thong. There he was. +Both her arms were round him. No, it was impossible. They could not be +going to part. "What is the matter, Mother?" said he; "you look very +pale." + +"Nothing, my child," she said and stooped down and kissed him. + +That night Amelia made the boy read the story of Samuel to her, and how +Hannah, his mother, having weaned him, brought him to Eli the High +Priest to minister before the Lord. And he read the song of gratitude +which Hannah sang, and which says, who it is who maketh poor and maketh +rich, and bringeth low and exalteth--how the poor shall be raised up +out of the dust, and how, in his own might, no man shall be strong. +Then he read how Samuel's mother made him a little coat and brought it +to him from year to year when she came up to offer the yearly +sacrifice. And then, in her sweet simple way, George's mother made +commentaries to the boy upon this affecting story. How Hannah, though +she loved her son so much, yet gave him up because of her vow. And how +she must always have thought of him as she sat at home, far away, +making the little coat; and Samuel, she was sure, never forgot his +mother; and how happy she must have been as the time came (and the +years pass away very quick) when she should see her boy and how good +and wise he had grown. This little sermon she spoke with a gentle +solemn voice, and dry eyes, until she came to the account of their +meeting--then the discourse broke off suddenly, the tender heart +overflowed, and taking the boy to her breast, she rocked him in her +arms and wept silently over him in a sainted agony of tears. + +Her mind being made up, the widow began to take such measures as seemed +right to her for advancing the end which she proposed. One day, Miss +Osborne, in Russell Square (Amelia had not written the name or number +of the house for ten years--her youth, her early story came back to her +as she wrote the superscription) one day Miss Osborne got a letter from +Amelia which made her blush very much and look towards her father, +sitting glooming in his place at the other end of the table. + +In simple terms, Amelia told her the reasons which had induced her to +change her mind respecting her boy. Her father had met with fresh +misfortunes which had entirely ruined him. Her own pittance was so +small that it would barely enable her to support her parents and would +not suffice to give George the advantages which were his due. Great as +her sufferings would be at parting with him she would, by God's help, +endure them for the boy's sake. She knew that those to whom he was +going would do all in their power to make him happy. She described his +disposition, such as she fancied it--quick and impatient of control or +harshness, easily to be moved by love and kindness. In a postscript, +she stipulated that she should have a written agreement, that she +should see the child as often as she wished--she could not part with +him under any other terms. + +"What? Mrs. Pride has come down, has she?" old Osborne said, when with +a tremulous eager voice Miss Osborne read him the letter. "Reg'lar +starved out, hey? Ha, ha! I knew she would." He tried to keep his +dignity and to read his paper as usual--but he could not follow it. He +chuckled and swore to himself behind the sheet. + +At last he flung it down and, scowling at his daughter, as his wont +was, went out of the room into his study adjoining, from whence he +presently returned with a key. He flung it to Miss Osborne. + +"Get the room over mine--his room that was--ready," he said. "Yes, +sir," his daughter replied in a tremble. It was George's room. It had +not been opened for more than ten years. Some of his clothes, papers, +handkerchiefs, whips and caps, fishing-rods and sporting gear, were +still there. An Army list of 1814, with his name written on the cover; +a little dictionary he was wont to use in writing; and the Bible his +mother had given him, were on the mantelpiece, with a pair of spurs and +a dried inkstand covered with the dust of ten years. Ah! since that +ink was wet, what days and people had passed away! The writing-book, +still on the table, was blotted with his hand. + +Miss Osborne was much affected when she first entered this room with +the servants under her. She sank quite pale on the little bed. "This +is blessed news, m'am--indeed, m'am," the housekeeper said; "and the +good old times is returning, m'am. The dear little feller, to be sure, +m'am; how happy he will be! But some folks in May Fair, m'am, will owe +him a grudge, m'am"; and she clicked back the bolt which held the +window-sash and let the air into the chamber. + +"You had better send that woman some money," Mr. Osborne said, before +he went out. "She shan't want for nothing. Send her a hundred pound." + +"And I'll go and see her to-morrow?" Miss Osborne asked. + +"That's your look out. She don't come in here, mind. No, by ------, +not for all the money in London. But she mustn't want now. So look +out, and get things right." With which brief speeches Mr. Osborne took +leave of his daughter and went on his accustomed way into the City. + +"Here, Papa, is some money," Amelia said that night, kissing the old +man, her father, and putting a bill for a hundred pounds into his +hands. "And--and, Mamma, don't be harsh with Georgy. He--he is not +going to stop with us long." She could say nothing more, and walked +away silently to her room. Let us close it upon her prayers and her +sorrow. I think we had best speak little about so much love and grief. + +Miss Osborne came the next day, according to the promise contained in +her note, and saw Amelia. The meeting between them was friendly. A +look and a few words from Miss Osborne showed the poor widow that, with +regard to this woman at least, there need be no fear lest she should +take the first place in her son's affection. She was cold, sensible, +not unkind. The mother had not been so well pleased, perhaps, had the +rival been better looking, younger, more affectionate, warmer-hearted. +Miss Osborne, on the other hand, thought of old times and memories and +could not but be touched with the poor mother's pitiful situation. She +was conquered, and laying down her arms, as it were, she humbly +submitted. That day they arranged together the preliminaries of the +treaty of capitulation. + +George was kept from school the next day, and saw his aunt. Amelia +left them alone together and went to her room. She was trying the +separation--as that poor gentle Lady Jane Grey felt the edge of the axe +that was to come down and sever her slender life. Days were passed in +parleys, visits, preparations. The widow broke the matter to Georgy +with great caution; she looked to see him very much affected by the +intelligence. He was rather elated than otherwise, and the poor woman +turned sadly away. He bragged about the news that day to the boys at +school; told them how he was going to live with his grandpapa, his +father's father, not the one who comes here sometimes; and that he +would be very rich, and have a carriage, and a pony, and go to a much +finer school, and when he was rich he would buy Leader's pencil-case +and pay the tart-woman. The boy was the image of his father, as his +fond mother thought. + +Indeed I have no heart, on account of our dear Amelia's sake, to go +through the story of George's last days at home. + +At last the day came, the carriage drove up, the little humble packets +containing tokens of love and remembrance were ready and disposed in +the hall long since--George was in his new suit, for which the tailor +had come previously to measure him. He had sprung up with the sun and +put on the new clothes, his mother hearing him from the room close by, +in which she had been lying, in speechless grief and watching. Days +before she had been making preparations for the end, purchasing little +stores for the boy's use, marking his books and linen, talking with him +and preparing him for the change--fondly fancying that he needed +preparation. + +So that he had change, what cared he? He was longing for it. By a +thousand eager declarations as to what he would do, when he went to +live with his grandfather, he had shown the poor widow how little the +idea of parting had cast him down. "He would come and see his mamma +often on the pony," he said. "He would come and fetch her in the +carriage; they would drive in the park, and she should have everything +she wanted." The poor mother was fain to content herself with these +selfish demonstrations of attachment, and tried to convince herself how +sincerely her son loved her. He must love her. All children were so: +a little anxious for novelty, and--no, not selfish, but self-willed. +Her child must have his enjoyments and ambition in the world. She +herself, by her own selfishness and imprudent love for him had denied +him his just rights and pleasures hitherto. + +I know few things more affecting than that timorous debasement and +self-humiliation of a woman. How she owns that it is she and not the +man who is guilty; how she takes all the faults on her side; how she +courts in a manner punishment for the wrongs which she has not +committed and persists in shielding the real culprit! It is those who +injure women who get the most kindness from them--they are born timid +and tyrants and maltreat those who are humblest before them. + +So poor Amelia had been getting ready in silent misery for her son's +departure, and had passed many and many a long solitary hour in making +preparations for the end. George stood by his mother, watching her +arrangements without the least concern. Tears had fallen into his +boxes; passages had been scored in his favourite books; old toys, +relics, treasures had been hoarded away for him, and packed with +strange neatness and care--and of all these things the boy took no +note. The child goes away smiling as the mother breaks her heart. By +heavens it is pitiful, the bootless love of women for children in +Vanity Fair. + +A few days are past, and the great event of Amelia's life is +consummated. No angel has intervened. The child is sacrificed and +offered up to fate, and the widow is quite alone. + +The boy comes to see her often, to be sure. He rides on a pony with a +coachman behind him, to the delight of his old grandfather, Sedley, who +walks proudly down the lane by his side. She sees him, but he is not +her boy any more. Why, he rides to see the boys at the little school, +too, and to show off before them his new wealth and splendour. In two +days he has adopted a slightly imperious air and patronizing manner. +He was born to command, his mother thinks, as his father was before him. + +It is fine weather now. Of evenings on the days when he does not come, +she takes a long walk into London--yes, as far as Russell Square, and +rests on the stone by the railing of the garden opposite Mr. Osborne's +house. It is so pleasant and cool. She can look up and see the +drawing-room windows illuminated, and, at about nine o'clock, the +chamber in the upper story where Georgy sleeps. She knows--he has told +her. She prays there as the light goes out, prays with an humble +heart, and walks home shrinking and silent. She is very tired when she +comes home. Perhaps she will sleep the better for that long weary +walk, and she may dream about Georgy. + +One Sunday she happened to be walking in Russell Square, at some +distance from Mr. Osborne's house (she could see it from a distance +though) when all the bells of Sabbath were ringing, and George and his +aunt came out to go to church; a little sweep asked for charity, and +the footman, who carried the books, tried to drive him away; but Georgy +stopped and gave him money. May God's blessing be on the boy! Emmy +ran round the square and, coming up to the sweep, gave him her mite +too. All the bells of Sabbath were ringing, and she followed them until +she came to the Foundling Church, into which she went. There she sat +in a place whence she could see the head of the boy under his father's +tombstone. Many hundred fresh children's voices rose up there and sang +hymns to the Father Beneficent, and little George's soul thrilled with +delight at the burst of glorious psalmody. His mother could not see +him for awhile, through the mist that dimmed her eyes. + + + +CHAPTER LI + +In Which a Charade Is Acted Which May or May Not Puzzle the Reader + +After Becky's appearance at my Lord Steyne's private and select +parties, the claims of that estimable woman as regards fashion were +settled, and some of the very greatest and tallest doors in the +metropolis were speedily opened to her--doors so great and tall that +the beloved reader and writer hereof may hope in vain to enter at them. +Dear brethren, let us tremble before those august portals. I fancy +them guarded by grooms of the chamber with flaming silver forks with +which they prong all those who have not the right of the entree. They +say the honest newspaper-fellow who sits in the hall and takes down the +names of the great ones who are admitted to the feasts dies after a +little time. He can't survive the glare of fashion long. It scorches +him up, as the presence of Jupiter in full dress wasted that poor +imprudent Semele--a giddy moth of a creature who ruined herself by +venturing out of her natural atmosphere. Her myth ought to be taken to +heart amongst the Tyburnians, the Belgravians--her story, and perhaps +Becky's too. Ah, ladies!--ask the Reverend Mr. Thurifer if Belgravia is +not a sounding brass and Tyburnia a tinkling cymbal. These are +vanities. Even these will pass away. And some day or other (but it +will be after our time, thank goodness) Hyde Park Gardens will be no +better known than the celebrated horticultural outskirts of Babylon, +and Belgrave Square will be as desolate as Baker Street, or Tadmor in +the wilderness. + +Ladies, are you aware that the great Pitt lived in Baker Street? What +would not your grandmothers have given to be asked to Lady Hester's +parties in that now decayed mansion? I have dined in it--moi qui vous +parle, I peopled the chamber with ghosts of the mighty dead. As we sat +soberly drinking claret there with men of to-day, the spirits of the +departed came in and took their places round the darksome board. The +pilot who weathered the storm tossed off great bumpers of spiritual +port; the shade of Dundas did not leave the ghost of a heeltap. +Addington sat bowing and smirking in a ghastly manner, and would not be +behindhand when the noiseless bottle went round; Scott, from under +bushy eyebrows, winked at the apparition of a beeswing; Wilberforce's +eyes went up to the ceiling, so that he did not seem to know how his +glass went up full to his mouth and came down empty; up to the ceiling +which was above us only yesterday, and which the great of the past days +have all looked at. They let the house as a furnished lodging now. +Yes, Lady Hester once lived in Baker Street, and lies asleep in the +wilderness. Eothen saw her there--not in Baker Street, but in the other +solitude. + +It is all vanity to be sure, but who will not own to liking a little of +it? I should like to know what well-constituted mind, merely because it +is transitory, dislikes roast beef? That is a vanity, but may every man +who reads this have a wholesome portion of it through life, I beg: +aye, though my readers were five hundred thousand. Sit down, gentlemen, +and fall to, with a good hearty appetite; the fat, the lean, the gravy, +the horse-radish as you like it--don't spare it. Another glass of +wine, Jones, my boy--a little bit of the Sunday side. Yes, let us eat +our fill of the vain thing and be thankful therefor. And let us make +the best of Becky's aristocratic pleasures likewise--for these too, +like all other mortal delights, were but transitory. + +The upshot of her visit to Lord Steyne was that His Highness the Prince +of Peterwaradin took occasion to renew his acquaintance with Colonel +Crawley, when they met on the next day at the Club, and to compliment +Mrs. Crawley in the Ring of Hyde Park with a profound salute of the +hat. She and her husband were invited immediately to one of the +Prince's small parties at Levant House, then occupied by His Highness +during the temporary absence from England of its noble proprietor. She +sang after dinner to a very little comite. The Marquis of Steyne was +present, paternally superintending the progress of his pupil. + +At Levant House Becky met one of the finest gentlemen and greatest +ministers that Europe has produced--the Duc de la Jabotiere, then +Ambassador from the Most Christian King, and subsequently Minister to +that monarch. I declare I swell with pride as these august names are +transcribed by my pen, and I think in what brilliant company my dear +Becky is moving. She became a constant guest at the French Embassy, +where no party was considered to be complete without the presence of +the charming Madame Ravdonn Cravley. Messieurs de Truffigny (of the +Perigord family) and Champignac, both attaches of the Embassy, were +straightway smitten by the charms of the fair Colonel's wife, and both +declared, according to the wont of their nation (for who ever yet met a +Frenchman, come out of England, that has not left half a dozen families +miserable, and brought away as many hearts in his pocket-book?), both, +I say, declared that they were au mieux with the charming Madame +Ravdonn. + +But I doubt the correctness of the assertion. Champignac was very fond +of ecarte, and made many parties with the Colonel of evenings, while +Becky was singing to Lord Steyne in the other room; and as for +Truffigny, it is a well-known fact that he dared not go to the +Travellers', where he owed money to the waiters, and if he had not had +the Embassy as a dining-place, the worthy young gentleman must have +starved. I doubt, I say, that Becky would have selected either of +these young men as a person on whom she would bestow her special +regard. They ran of her messages, purchased her gloves and flowers, +went in debt for opera-boxes for her, and made themselves amiable in a +thousand ways. And they talked English with adorable simplicity, and +to the constant amusement of Becky and my Lord Steyne, she would mimic +one or other to his face, and compliment him on his advance in the +English language with a gravity which never failed to tickle the +Marquis, her sardonic old patron. Truffigny gave Briggs a shawl by way +of winning over Becky's confidante, and asked her to take charge of a +letter which the simple spinster handed over in public to the person to +whom it was addressed, and the composition of which amused everybody +who read it greatly. Lord Steyne read it, everybody but honest Rawdon, +to whom it was not necessary to tell everything that passed in the +little house in May Fair. + +Here, before long, Becky received not only "the best" foreigners (as +the phrase is in our noble and admirable society slang), but some of +the best English people too. I don't mean the most virtuous, or indeed +the least virtuous, or the cleverest, or the stupidest, or the richest, +or the best born, but "the best,"--in a word, people about whom there +is no question--such as the great Lady Fitz-Willis, that Patron Saint +of Almack's, the great Lady Slowbore, the great Lady Grizzel Macbeth +(she was Lady G. Glowry, daughter of Lord Grey of Glowry), and the +like. When the Countess of Fitz-Willis (her Ladyship is of the +Kingstreet family, see Debrett and Burke) takes up a person, he or she +is safe. There is no question about them any more. Not that my Lady +Fitz-Willis is any better than anybody else, being, on the contrary, a +faded person, fifty-seven years of age, and neither handsome, nor +wealthy, nor entertaining; but it is agreed on all sides that she is of +the "best people." Those who go to her are of the best: and from an +old grudge probably to Lady Steyne (for whose coronet her ladyship, +then the youthful Georgina Frederica, daughter of the Prince of Wales's +favourite, the Earl of Portansherry, had once tried), this great and +famous leader of the fashion chose to acknowledge Mrs. Rawdon Crawley; +made her a most marked curtsey at the assembly over which she presided; +and not only encouraged her son, St. Kitts (his lordship got his place +through Lord Steyne's interest), to frequent Mrs. Crawley's house, but +asked her to her own mansion and spoke to her twice in the most public +and condescending manner during dinner. The important fact was known +all over London that night. People who had been crying fie about Mrs. +Crawley were silent. Wenham, the wit and lawyer, Lord Steyne's +right-hand man, went about everywhere praising her: some who had +hesitated, came forward at once and welcomed her; little Tom Toady, who +had warned Southdown about visiting such an abandoned woman, now +besought to be introduced to her. In a word, she was admitted to be +among the "best" people. Ah, my beloved readers and brethren, do not +envy poor Becky prematurely--glory like this is said to be fugitive. +It is currently reported that even in the very inmost circles, they are +no happier than the poor wanderers outside the zone; and Becky, who +penetrated into the very centre of fashion and saw the great George IV +face to face, has owned since that there too was Vanity. + +We must be brief in descanting upon this part of her career. As I +cannot describe the mysteries of freemasonry, although I have a shrewd +idea that it is a humbug, so an uninitiated man cannot take upon +himself to portray the great world accurately, and had best keep his +opinions to himself, whatever they are. + +Becky has often spoken in subsequent years of this season of her life, +when she moved among the very greatest circles of the London fashion. +Her success excited, elated, and then bored her. At first no +occupation was more pleasant than to invent and procure (the latter a +work of no small trouble and ingenuity, by the way, in a person of Mrs. +Rawdon Crawley's very narrow means)--to procure, we say, the prettiest +new dresses and ornaments; to drive to fine dinner parties, where she +was welcomed by great people; and from the fine dinner parties to fine +assemblies, whither the same people came with whom she had been dining, +whom she had met the night before, and would see on the morrow--the +young men faultlessly appointed, handsomely cravatted, with the neatest +glossy boots and white gloves--the elders portly, brass-buttoned, +noble-looking, polite, and prosy--the young ladies blonde, timid, and +in pink--the mothers grand, beautiful, sumptuous, solemn, and in +diamonds. They talked in English, not in bad French, as they do in the +novels. They talked about each others' houses, and characters, and +families--just as the Joneses do about the Smiths. Becky's former +acquaintances hated and envied her; the poor woman herself was yawning +in spirit. "I wish I were out of it," she said to herself. "I would +rather be a parson's wife and teach a Sunday school than this; or a +sergeant's lady and ride in the regimental waggon; or, oh, how much +gayer it would be to wear spangles and trousers and dance before a +booth at a fair." + +"You would do it very well," said Lord Steyne, laughing. She used to +tell the great man her ennuis and perplexities in her artless way--they +amused him. + +"Rawdon would make a very good Ecuyer--Master of the Ceremonies--what +do you call him--the man in the large boots and the uniform, who goes +round the ring cracking the whip? He is large, heavy, and of a military +figure. I recollect," Becky continued pensively, "my father took me to +see a show at Brookgreen Fair when I was a child, and when we came +home, I made myself a pair of stilts and danced in the studio to the +wonder of all the pupils." + +"I should have liked to see it," said Lord Steyne. + +"I should like to do it now," Becky continued. "How Lady Blinkey would +open her eyes, and Lady Grizzel Macbeth would stare! Hush! silence! +there is Pasta beginning to sing." Becky always made a point of being +conspicuously polite to the professional ladies and gentlemen who +attended at these aristocratic parties--of following them into the +corners where they sat in silence, and shaking hands with them, and +smiling in the view of all persons. She was an artist herself, as she +said very truly; there was a frankness and humility in the manner in +which she acknowledged her origin, which provoked, or disarmed, or +amused lookers-on, as the case might be. "How cool that woman is," said +one; "what airs of independence she assumes, where she ought to sit +still and be thankful if anybody speaks to her!" "What an honest and +good-natured soul she is!" said another. "What an artful little minx" +said a third. They were all right very likely, but Becky went her own +way, and so fascinated the professional personages that they would +leave off their sore throats in order to sing at her parties and give +her lessons for nothing. + +Yes, she gave parties in the little house in Curzon Street. Many +scores of carriages, with blazing lamps, blocked up the street, to the +disgust of No. 100, who could not rest for the thunder of the knocking, +and of 102, who could not sleep for envy. The gigantic footmen who +accompanied the vehicles were too big to be contained in Becky's little +hall, and were billeted off in the neighbouring public-houses, whence, +when they were wanted, call-boys summoned them from their beer. Scores +of the great dandies of London squeezed and trod on each other on the +little stairs, laughing to find themselves there; and many spotless and +severe ladies of ton were seated in the little drawing-room, listening +to the professional singers, who were singing according to their wont, +and as if they wished to blow the windows down. And the day after, +there appeared among the fashionable reunions in the Morning Post a +paragraph to the following effect: + +"Yesterday, Colonel and Mrs. Crawley entertained a select party at +dinner at their house in May Fair. Their Excellencies the Prince and +Princess of Peterwaradin, H. E. Papoosh Pasha, the Turkish Ambassador +(attended by Kibob Bey, dragoman of the mission), the Marquess of +Steyne, Earl of Southdown, Sir Pitt and Lady Jane Crawley, Mr. Wagg, +&c. After dinner Mrs. Crawley had an assembly which was attended by +the Duchess (Dowager) of Stilton, Duc de la Gruyere, Marchioness of +Cheshire, Marchese Alessandro Strachino, Comte de Brie, Baron +Schapzuger, Chevalier Tosti, Countess of Slingstone, and Lady F. +Macadam, Major-General and Lady G. Macbeth, and (2) Miss Macbeths; +Viscount Paddington, Sir Horace Fogey, Hon. Sands Bedwin, Bobachy +Bahawder," and an &c., which the reader may fill at his pleasure +through a dozen close lines of small type. + +And in her commerce with the great our dear friend showed the same +frankness which distinguished her transactions with the lowly in +station. On one occasion, when out at a very fine house, Rebecca was +(perhaps rather ostentatiously) holding a conversation in the French +language with a celebrated tenor singer of that nation, while the Lady +Grizzel Macbeth looked over her shoulder scowling at the pair. + +"How very well you speak French," Lady Grizzel said, who herself spoke +the tongue in an Edinburgh accent most remarkable to hear. + +"I ought to know it," Becky modestly said, casting down her eyes. "I +taught it in a school, and my mother was a Frenchwoman." + +Lady Grizzel was won by her humility and was mollified towards the +little woman. She deplored the fatal levelling tendencies of the age, +which admitted persons of all classes into the society of their +superiors, but her ladyship owned that this one at least was well +behaved and never forgot her place in life. She was a very good woman: +good to the poor; stupid, blameless, unsuspicious. It is not her +ladyship's fault that she fancies herself better than you and me. The +skirts of her ancestors' garments have been kissed for centuries; it is +a thousand years, they say, since the tartans of the head of the family +were embraced by the defunct Duncan's lords and councillors, when the +great ancestor of the House became King of Scotland. + +Lady Steyne, after the music scene, succumbed before Becky, and perhaps +was not disinclined to her. The younger ladies of the house of Gaunt +were also compelled into submission. Once or twice they set people at +her, but they failed. The brilliant Lady Stunnington tried a passage +of arms with her, but was routed with great slaughter by the intrepid +little Becky. When attacked sometimes, Becky had a knack of adopting a +demure ingenue air, under which she was most dangerous. She said the +wickedest things with the most simple unaffected air when in this mood, +and would take care artlessly to apologize for her blunders, so that +all the world should know that she had made them. + +Mr. Wagg, the celebrated wit, and a led captain and trencher-man of my +Lord Steyne, was caused by the ladies to charge her; and the worthy +fellow, leering at his patronesses and giving them a wink, as much as +to say, "Now look out for sport," one evening began an assault upon +Becky, who was unsuspiciously eating her dinner. The little woman, +attacked on a sudden, but never without arms, lighted up in an instant, +parried and riposted with a home-thrust, which made Wagg's face tingle +with shame; then she returned to her soup with the most perfect calm +and a quiet smile on her face. Wagg's great patron, who gave him +dinners and lent him a little money sometimes, and whose election, +newspaper, and other jobs Wagg did, gave the luckless fellow such a +savage glance with the eyes as almost made him sink under the table and +burst into tears. He looked piteously at my lord, who never spoke to +him during dinner, and at the ladies, who disowned him. At last Becky +herself took compassion upon him and tried to engage him in talk. He +was not asked to dinner again for six weeks; and Fiche, my lord's +confidential man, to whom Wagg naturally paid a good deal of court, was +instructed to tell him that if he ever dared to say a rude thing to +Mrs. Crawley again, or make her the butt of his stupid jokes, Milor +would put every one of his notes of hand into his lawyer's hands and +sell him up without mercy. Wagg wept before Fiche and implored his +dear friend to intercede for him. He wrote a poem in favour of Mrs. R. +C., which appeared in the very next number of the Harum-scarum +Magazine, which he conducted. He implored her good-will at parties +where he met her. He cringed and coaxed Rawdon at the club. He was +allowed to come back to Gaunt House after a while. Becky was always +good to him, always amused, never angry. + +His lordship's vizier and chief confidential servant (with a seat in +parliament and at the dinner table), Mr. Wenham, was much more prudent +in his behaviour and opinions than Mr. Wagg. However much he might be +disposed to hate all parvenus (Mr. Wenham himself was a staunch old +True Blue Tory, and his father a small coal-merchant in the north of +England), this aide-de-camp of the Marquis never showed any sort of +hostility to the new favourite, but pursued her with stealthy +kindnesses and a sly and deferential politeness which somehow made +Becky more uneasy than other people's overt hostilities. + +How the Crawleys got the money which was spent upon the entertainments +with which they treated the polite world was a mystery which gave rise +to some conversation at the time, and probably added zest to these +little festivities. Some persons averred that Sir Pitt Crawley gave +his brother a handsome allowance; if he did, Becky's power over the +Baronet must have been extraordinary indeed, and his character greatly +changed in his advanced age. Other parties hinted that it was Becky's +habit to levy contributions on all her husband's friends: going to this +one in tears with an account that there was an execution in the house; +falling on her knees to that one and declaring that the whole family +must go to gaol or commit suicide unless such and such a bill could be +paid. Lord Southdown, it was said, had been induced to give many +hundreds through these pathetic representations. Young Feltham, of the +--th Dragoons (and son of the firm of Tiler and Feltham, hatters and +army accoutrement makers), and whom the Crawleys introduced into +fashionable life, was also cited as one of Becky's victims in the +pecuniary way. People declared that she got money from various simply +disposed persons, under pretence of getting them confidential +appointments under Government. Who knows what stories were or were not +told of our dear and innocent friend? Certain it is that if she had had +all the money which she was said to have begged or borrowed or stolen, +she might have capitalized and been honest for life, whereas,--but this +is advancing matters. + +The truth is, that by economy and good management--by a sparing use of +ready money and by paying scarcely anybody--people can manage, for a +time at least, to make a great show with very little means: and it is +our belief that Becky's much-talked-of parties, which were not, after +all was said, very numerous, cost this lady very little more than the +wax candles which lighted the walls. Stillbrook and Queen's Crawley +supplied her with game and fruit in abundance. Lord Steyne's cellars +were at her disposal, and that excellent nobleman's famous cooks +presided over her little kitchen, or sent by my lord's order the rarest +delicacies from their own. I protest it is quite shameful in the world +to abuse a simple creature, as people of her time abuse Becky, and I +warn the public against believing one-tenth of the stories against her. +If every person is to be banished from society who runs into debt and +cannot pay--if we are to be peering into everybody's private life, +speculating upon their income, and cutting them if we don't approve of +their expenditure--why, what a howling wilderness and intolerable +dwelling Vanity Fair would be! Every man's hand would be against his +neighbour in this case, my dear sir, and the benefits of civilization +would be done away with. We should be quarrelling, abusing, avoiding +one another. Our houses would become caverns, and we should go in rags +because we cared for nobody. Rents would go down. Parties wouldn't be +given any more. All the tradesmen of the town would be bankrupt. Wine, +wax-lights, comestibles, rouge, crinoline-petticoats, diamonds, wigs, +Louis-Quatorze gimcracks, and old china, park hacks, and splendid +high-stepping carriage horses--all the delights of life, I say,--would +go to the deuce, if people did but act upon their silly principles and +avoid those whom they dislike and abuse. Whereas, by a little charity +and mutual forbearance, things are made to go on pleasantly enough: we +may abuse a man as much as we like, and call him the greatest rascal +unhanged--but do we wish to hang him therefore? No. We shake hands when +we meet. If his cook is good we forgive him and go and dine with him, +and we expect he will do the same by us. Thus trade +flourishes--civilization advances; peace is kept; new dresses are +wanted for new assemblies every week; and the last year's vintage of +Lafitte will remunerate the honest proprietor who reared it. + +At the time whereof we are writing, though the Great George was on the +throne and ladies wore gigots and large combs like tortoise-shell +shovels in their hair, instead of the simple sleeves and lovely wreaths +which are actually in fashion, the manners of the very polite world +were not, I take it, essentially different from those of the present +day: and their amusements pretty similar. To us, from the outside, +gazing over the policeman's shoulders at the bewildering beauties as +they pass into Court or ball, they may seem beings of unearthly +splendour and in the enjoyment of an exquisite happiness by us +unattainable. It is to console some of these dissatisfied beings that +we are narrating our dear Becky's struggles, and triumphs, and +disappointments, of all of which, indeed, as is the case with all +persons of merit, she had her share. + +At this time the amiable amusement of acting charades had come among us +from France, and was considerably in vogue in this country, enabling +the many ladies amongst us who had beauty to display their charms, and +the fewer number who had cleverness to exhibit their wit. My Lord +Steyne was incited by Becky, who perhaps believed herself endowed with +both the above qualifications, to give an entertainment at Gaunt House, +which should include some of these little dramas--and we must take +leave to introduce the reader to this brilliant reunion, and, with a +melancholy welcome too, for it will be among the very last of the +fashionable entertainments to which it will be our fortune to conduct +him. + +A portion of that splendid room, the picture gallery of Gaunt House, +was arranged as the charade theatre. It had been so used when George +III was king; and a picture of the Marquis of Gaunt is still extant, +with his hair in powder and a pink ribbon, in a Roman shape, as it was +called, enacting the part of Cato in Mr. Addison's tragedy of that +name, performed before their Royal Highnesses the Prince of Wales, the +Bishop of Osnaburgh, and Prince William Henry, then children like the +actor. One or two of the old properties were drawn out of the garrets, +where they had lain ever since, and furbished up anew for the present +festivities. + +Young Bedwin Sands, then an elegant dandy and Eastern traveller, was +manager of the revels. An Eastern traveller was somebody in those +days, and the adventurous Bedwin, who had published his quarto and +passed some months under the tents in the desert, was a personage of no +small importance. In his volume there were several pictures of Sands +in various oriental costumes; and he travelled about with a black +attendant of most unprepossessing appearance, just like another Brian +de Bois Guilbert. Bedwin, his costumes, and black man, were hailed at +Gaunt House as very valuable acquisitions. + +He led off the first charade. A Turkish officer with an immense plume +of feathers (the Janizaries were supposed to be still in existence, and +the tarboosh had not as yet displaced the ancient and majestic +head-dress of the true believers) was seen couched on a divan, and +making believe to puff at a narghile, in which, however, for the sake +of the ladies, only a fragrant pastille was allowed to smoke. The +Turkish dignitary yawns and expresses signs of weariness and idleness. +He claps his hands and Mesrour the Nubian appears, with bare arms, +bangles, yataghans, and every Eastern ornament--gaunt, tall, and +hideous. He makes a salaam before my lord the Aga. + +A thrill of terror and delight runs through the assembly. The ladies +whisper to one another. The black slave was given to Bedwin Sands by +an Egyptian pasha in exchange for three dozen of Maraschino. He has +sewn up ever so many odalisques in sacks and tilted them into the Nile. + +"Bid the slave-merchant enter," says the Turkish voluptuary with a wave +of his hand. Mesrour conducts the slave-merchant into my lord's +presence; he brings a veiled female with him. He removes the veil. A +thrill of applause bursts through the house. It is Mrs. Winkworth (she +was a Miss Absolom) with the beautiful eyes and hair. She is in a +gorgeous oriental costume; the black braided locks are twined with +innumerable jewels; her dress is covered over with gold piastres. The +odious Mahometan expresses himself charmed by her beauty. She falls +down on her knees and entreats him to restore her to the mountains +where she was born, and where her Circassian lover is still deploring +the absence of his Zuleikah. No entreaties will move the obdurate +Hassan. He laughs at the notion of the Circassian bridegroom. Zuleikah +covers her face with her hands and drops down in an attitude of the +most beautiful despair. There seems to be no hope for her, when--when +the Kislar Aga appears. + +The Kislar Aga brings a letter from the Sultan. Hassan receives and +places on his head the dread firman. A ghastly terror seizes him, +while on the Negro's face (it is Mesrour again in another costume) +appears a ghastly joy. "Mercy! mercy!" cries the Pasha: while the +Kislar Aga, grinning horribly, pulls out--a bow-string. + +The curtain draws just as he is going to use that awful weapon. Hassan +from within bawls out, "First two syllables"--and Mrs. Rawdon Crawley, +who is going to act in the charade, comes forward and compliments Mrs. +Winkworth on the admirable taste and beauty of her costume. + +The second part of the charade takes place. It is still an Eastern +scene. Hassan, in another dress, is in an attitude by Zuleikah, who is +perfectly reconciled to him. The Kislar Aga has become a peaceful black +slave. It is sunrise on the desert, and the Turks turn their heads +eastwards and bow to the sand. As there are no dromedaries at hand, +the band facetiously plays "The Camels are coming." An enormous +Egyptian head figures in the scene. It is a musical one--and, to the +surprise of the oriental travellers, sings a comic song, composed by +Mr. Wagg. The Eastern voyagers go off dancing, like Papageno and the +Moorish King in The Magic Flute. "Last two syllables," roars the head. + +The last act opens. It is a Grecian tent this time. A tall and +stalwart man reposes on a couch there. Above him hang his helmet and +shield. There is no need for them now. Ilium is down. Iphigenia is +slain. Cassandra is a prisoner in his outer halls. The king of men (it +is Colonel Crawley, who, indeed, has no notion about the sack of Ilium +or the conquest of Cassandra), the anax andron is asleep in his chamber +at Argos. A lamp casts the broad shadow of the sleeping warrior +flickering on the wall--the sword and shield of Troy glitter in its +light. The band plays the awful music of Don Juan, before the statue +enters. + +Aegisthus steals in pale and on tiptoe. What is that ghastly face +looking out balefully after him from behind the arras? He raises his +dagger to strike the sleeper, who turns in his bed, and opens his broad +chest as if for the blow. He cannot strike the noble slumbering +chieftain. Clytemnestra glides swiftly into the room like an +apparition--her arms are bare and white--her tawny hair floats down her +shoulders--her face is deadly pale--and her eyes are lighted up with a +smile so ghastly that people quake as they look at her. + +A tremor ran through the room. "Good God!" somebody said, "it's Mrs. +Rawdon Crawley." + +Scornfully she snatches the dagger out of Aegisthus's hand and advances +to the bed. You see it shining over her head in the glimmer of the +lamp, and--and the lamp goes out, with a groan, and all is dark. + +The darkness and the scene frightened people. Rebecca performed her +part so well, and with such ghastly truth, that the spectators were all +dumb, until, with a burst, all the lamps of the hall blazed out again, +when everybody began to shout applause. "Brava! brava!" old Steyne's +strident voice was heard roaring over all the rest. "By--, she'd do it +too," he said between his teeth. The performers were called by the +whole house, which sounded with cries of "Manager! Clytemnestra!" +Agamemnon could not be got to show in his classical tunic, but stood in +the background with Aegisthus and others of the performers of the +little play. Mr. Bedwin Sands led on Zuleikah and Clytemnestra. A +great personage insisted on being presented to the charming +Clytemnestra. "Heigh ha? Run him through the body. Marry somebody +else, hay?" was the apposite remark made by His Royal Highness. + +"Mrs. Rawdon Crawley was quite killing in the part," said Lord Steyne. +Becky laughed, gay and saucy looking, and swept the prettiest little +curtsey ever seen. + +Servants brought in salvers covered with numerous cool dainties, and +the performers disappeared to get ready for the second charade-tableau. + +The three syllables of this charade were to be depicted in pantomime, +and the performance took place in the following wise: + +First syllable. Colonel Rawdon Crawley, C.B., with a slouched hat and +a staff, a great-coat, and a lantern borrowed from the stables, passed +across the stage bawling out, as if warning the inhabitants of the +hour. In the lower window are seen two bagmen playing apparently at +the game of cribbage, over which they yawn much. To them enters one +looking like Boots (the Honourable G. Ringwood), which character the +young gentleman performed to perfection, and divests them of their +lower coverings; and presently Chambermaid (the Right Honourable Lord +Southdown) with two candlesticks, and a warming-pan. She ascends to +the upper apartment and warms the bed. She uses the warming-pan as a +weapon wherewith she wards off the attention of the bagmen. She exits. +They put on their night-caps and pull down the blinds. Boots comes out +and closes the shutters of the ground-floor chamber. You hear him +bolting and chaining the door within. All the lights go out. The +music plays Dormez, dormez, chers Amours. A voice from behind the +curtain says, "First syllable." + +Second syllable. The lamps are lighted up all of a sudden. The music +plays the old air from John of Paris, Ah quel plaisir d'etre en voyage. +It is the same scene. Between the first and second floors of the house +represented, you behold a sign on which the Steyne arms are painted. +All the bells are ringing all over the house. In the lower apartment +you see a man with a long slip of paper presenting it to another, who +shakes his fists, threatens and vows that it is monstrous. "Ostler, +bring round my gig," cries another at the door. He chucks Chambermaid +(the Right Honourable Lord Southdown) under the chin; she seems to +deplore his absence, as Calypso did that of that other eminent +traveller Ulysses. Boots (the Honourable G. Ringwood) passes with a +wooden box, containing silver flagons, and cries "Pots" with such +exquisite humour and naturalness that the whole house rings with +applause, and a bouquet is thrown to him. Crack, crack, crack, go the +whips. Landlord, chambermaid, waiter rush to the door, but just as +some distinguished guest is arriving, the curtains close, and the +invisible theatrical manager cries out "Second syllable." + +"I think it must be 'Hotel,'" says Captain Grigg of the Life Guards; +there is a general laugh at the Captain's cleverness. He is not very +far from the mark. + +While the third syllable is in preparation, the band begins a nautical +medley--"All in the Downs," "Cease Rude Boreas," "Rule Britannia," "In +the Bay of Biscay O!"--some maritime event is about to take place. A +bell is heard ringing as the curtain draws aside. "Now, gents, for the +shore!" a voice exclaims. People take leave of each other. They point +anxiously as if towards the clouds, which are represented by a dark +curtain, and they nod their heads in fear. Lady Squeams (the Right +Honourable Lord Southdown), her lap-dog, her bags, reticules, and +husband sit down, and cling hold of some ropes. It is evidently a ship. + +The Captain (Colonel Crawley, C.B.), with a cocked hat and a telescope, +comes in, holding his hat on his head, and looks out; his coat tails +fly about as if in the wind. When he leaves go of his hat to use his +telescope, his hat flies off, with immense applause. It is blowing +fresh. The music rises and whistles louder and louder; the mariners go +across the stage staggering, as if the ship was in severe motion. The +Steward (the Honourable G. Ringwood) passes reeling by, holding six +basins. He puts one rapidly by Lord Squeams--Lady Squeams, giving a +pinch to her dog, which begins to howl piteously, puts her +pocket-handkerchief to her face, and rushes away as for the cabin. The +music rises up to the wildest pitch of stormy excitement, and the third +syllable is concluded. + +There was a little ballet, "Le Rossignol," in which Montessu and Noblet +used to be famous in those days, and which Mr. Wagg transferred to the +English stage as an opera, putting his verse, of which he was a skilful +writer, to the pretty airs of the ballet. It was dressed in old French +costume, and little Lord Southdown now appeared admirably attired in +the disguise of an old woman hobbling about the stage with a faultless +crooked stick. + +Trills of melody were heard behind the scenes, and gurgling from a +sweet pasteboard cottage covered with roses and trellis work. +"Philomele, Philomele," cries the old woman, and Philomele comes out. + +More applause--it is Mrs. Rawdon Crawley in powder and patches, the +most ravissante little Marquise in the world. + +She comes in laughing, humming, and frisks about the stage with all the +innocence of theatrical youth--she makes a curtsey. Mamma says "Why, +child, you are always laughing and singing," and away she goes, with-- + + THE ROSE UPON MY BALCONY + + The rose upon my balcony the morning air perfuming + Was leafless all the winter time and pining for the spring; + You ask me why her breath is sweet and why her cheek is blooming, + It is because the sun is out and birds begin to sing. + + The nightingale, whose melody is through the greenwood ringing, + Was silent when the boughs were bare and winds were blowing keen: + And if, Mamma, you ask of me the reason of his singing, + It is because the sun is out and all the leaves are green. + + Thus each performs his part, Mamma, the birds have found their voices, + The blowing rose a flush, Mamma, her bonny cheek to dye; + And there's sunshine in my heart, Mamma, which wakens and rejoices, + And so I sing and blush, Mamma, and that's the reason why. + + +During the intervals of the stanzas of this ditty, the good-natured +personage addressed as Mamma by the singer, and whose large whiskers +appeared under her cap, seemed very anxious to exhibit her maternal +affection by embracing the innocent creature who performed the +daughter's part. Every caress was received with loud acclamations of +laughter by the sympathizing audience. At its conclusion (while the +music was performing a symphony as if ever so many birds were warbling) +the whole house was unanimous for an encore: and applause and bouquets +without end were showered upon the Nightingale of the evening. Lord +Steyne's voice of applause was loudest of all. Becky, the nightingale, +took the flowers which he threw to her and pressed them to her heart +with the air of a consummate comedian. Lord Steyne was frantic with +delight. His guests' enthusiasm harmonized with his own. Where was +the beautiful black-eyed Houri whose appearance in the first charade +had caused such delight? She was twice as handsome as Becky, but the +brilliancy of the latter had quite eclipsed her. All voices were for +her. Stephens, Caradori, Ronzi de Begnis, people compared her to one +or the other, and agreed with good reason, very likely, that had she +been an actress none on the stage could have surpassed her. She had +reached her culmination: her voice rose trilling and bright over the +storm of applause, and soared as high and joyful as her triumph. There +was a ball after the dramatic entertainments, and everybody pressed +round Becky as the great point of attraction of the evening. The Royal +Personage declared with an oath that she was perfection, and engaged +her again and again in conversation. Little Becky's soul swelled with +pride and delight at these honours; she saw fortune, fame, fashion +before her. Lord Steyne was her slave, followed her everywhere, and +scarcely spoke to any one in the room beside, and paid her the most +marked compliments and attention. She still appeared in her Marquise +costume and danced a minuet with Monsieur de Truffigny, Monsieur Le Duc +de la Jabotiere's attache; and the Duke, who had all the traditions of +the ancient court, pronounced that Madame Crawley was worthy to have +been a pupil of Vestris, or to have figured at Versailles. Only a +feeling of dignity, the gout, and the strongest sense of duty and +personal sacrifice prevented his Excellency from dancing with her +himself, and he declared in public that a lady who could talk and dance +like Mrs. Rawdon was fit to be ambassadress at any court in Europe. He +was only consoled when he heard that she was half a Frenchwoman by +birth. "None but a compatriot," his Excellency declared, "could have +performed that majestic dance in such a way." + +Then she figured in a waltz with Monsieur de Klingenspohr, the Prince +of Peterwaradin's cousin and attache. The delighted Prince, having +less retenue than his French diplomatic colleague, insisted upon taking +a turn with the charming creature, and twirled round the ball-room with +her, scattering the diamonds out of his boot-tassels and hussar jacket +until his Highness was fairly out of breath. Papoosh Pasha himself +would have liked to dance with her if that amusement had been the +custom of his country. The company made a circle round her and +applauded as wildly as if she had been a Noblet or a Taglioni. +Everybody was in ecstacy; and Becky too, you may be sure. She passed +by Lady Stunnington with a look of scorn. She patronized Lady Gaunt +and her astonished and mortified sister-in-law--she ecrased all rival +charmers. As for poor Mrs. Winkworth, and her long hair and great +eyes, which had made such an effect at the commencement of the +evening--where was she now? Nowhere in the race. She might tear her +long hair and cry her great eyes out, but there was not a person to +heed or to deplore the discomfiture. + +The greatest triumph of all was at supper time. She was placed at the +grand exclusive table with his Royal Highness the exalted personage +before mentioned, and the rest of the great guests. She was served on +gold plate. She might have had pearls melted into her champagne if she +liked--another Cleopatra--and the potentate of Peterwaradin would have +given half the brilliants off his jacket for a kind glance from those +dazzling eyes. Jabotiere wrote home about her to his government. The +ladies at the other tables, who supped off mere silver and marked Lord +Steyne's constant attention to her, vowed it was a monstrous +infatuation, a gross insult to ladies of rank. If sarcasm could have +killed, Lady Stunnington would have slain her on the spot. + +Rawdon Crawley was scared at these triumphs. They seemed to separate +his wife farther than ever from him somehow. He thought with a feeling +very like pain how immeasurably she was his superior. + +When the hour of departure came, a crowd of young men followed her to +her carriage, for which the people without bawled, the cry being caught +up by the link-men who were stationed outside the tall gates of Gaunt +House, congratulating each person who issued from the gate and hoping +his Lordship had enjoyed this noble party. + +Mrs. Rawdon Crawley's carriage, coming up to the gate after due +shouting, rattled into the illuminated court-yard and drove up to the +covered way. Rawdon put his wife into the carriage, which drove off. +Mr. Wenham had proposed to him to walk home, and offered the Colonel +the refreshment of a cigar. + +They lighted their cigars by the lamp of one of the many link-boys +outside, and Rawdon walked on with his friend Wenham. Two persons +separated from the crowd and followed the two gentlemen; and when they +had walked down Gaunt Square a few score of paces, one of the men came +up and, touching Rawdon on the shoulder, said, "Beg your pardon, +Colonel, I vish to speak to you most particular." This gentleman's +acquaintance gave a loud whistle as the latter spoke, at which signal a +cab came clattering up from those stationed at the gate of Gaunt +House--and the aide-de-camp ran round and placed himself in front of +Colonel Crawley. + +That gallant officer at once knew what had befallen him. He was in the +hands of the bailiffs. He started back, falling against the man who +had first touched him. + +"We're three on us--it's no use bolting," the man behind said. + +"It's you, Moss, is it?" said the Colonel, who appeared to know his +interlocutor. "How much is it?" + +"Only a small thing," whispered Mr. Moss, of Cursitor Street, Chancery +Lane, and assistant officer to the Sheriff of Middlesex--"One hundred +and sixty-six, six and eight-pence, at the suit of Mr. Nathan." + +"Lend me a hundred, Wenham, for God's sake," poor Rawdon said--"I've +got seventy at home." + +"I've not got ten pounds in the world," said poor Mr. Wenham--"Good +night, my dear fellow." + +"Good night," said Rawdon ruefully. And Wenham walked away--and Rawdon +Crawley finished his cigar as the cab drove under Temple Bar. + + + +CHAPTER LII + +In Which Lord Steyne Shows Himself in a Most Amiable Light + +When Lord Steyne was benevolently disposed, he did nothing by halves, +and his kindness towards the Crawley family did the greatest honour to +his benevolent discrimination. His lordship extended his good-will to +little Rawdon: he pointed out to the boy's parents the necessity of +sending him to a public school, that he was of an age now when +emulation, the first principles of the Latin language, pugilistic +exercises, and the society of his fellow-boys would be of the greatest +benefit to the boy. His father objected that he was not rich enough to +send the child to a good public school; his mother that Briggs was a +capital mistress for him, and had brought him on (as indeed was the +fact) famously in English, the Latin rudiments, and in general +learning: but all these objections disappeared before the generous +perseverance of the Marquis of Steyne. His lordship was one of the +governors of that famous old collegiate institution called the +Whitefriars. It had been a Cistercian Convent in old days, when the +Smithfield, which is contiguous to it, was a tournament ground. +Obstinate heretics used to be brought thither convenient for burning +hard by. Henry VIII, the Defender of the Faith, seized upon the +monastery and its possessions and hanged and tortured some of the monks +who could not accommodate themselves to the pace of his reform. +Finally, a great merchant bought the house and land adjoining, in +which, and with the help of other wealthy endowments of land and money, +he established a famous foundation hospital for old men and children. +An extern school grew round the old almost monastic foundation, which +subsists still with its middle-age costume and usages--and all +Cistercians pray that it may long flourish. + +Of this famous house, some of the greatest noblemen, prelates, and +dignitaries in England are governors: and as the boys are very +comfortably lodged, fed, and educated, and subsequently inducted to +good scholarships at the University and livings in the Church, many +little gentlemen are devoted to the ecclesiastical profession from +their tenderest years, and there is considerable emulation to procure +nominations for the foundation. It was originally intended for the +sons of poor and deserving clerics and laics, but many of the noble +governors of the Institution, with an enlarged and rather capricious +benevolence, selected all sorts of objects for their bounty. To get an +education for nothing, and a future livelihood and profession assured, +was so excellent a scheme that some of the richest people did not +disdain it; and not only great men's relations, but great men +themselves, sent their sons to profit by the chance--Right Rev. +prelates sent their own kinsmen or the sons of their clergy, while, on +the other hand, some great noblemen did not disdain to patronize the +children of their confidential servants--so that a lad entering this +establishment had every variety of youthful society wherewith to mingle. + +Rawdon Crawley, though the only book which he studied was the Racing +Calendar, and though his chief recollections of polite learning were +connected with the floggings which he received at Eton in his early +youth, had that decent and honest reverence for classical learning +which all English gentlemen feel, and was glad to think that his son +was to have a provision for life, perhaps, and a certain opportunity of +becoming a scholar. And although his boy was his chief solace and +companion, and endeared to him by a thousand small ties, about which he +did not care to speak to his wife, who had all along shown the utmost +indifference to their son, yet Rawdon agreed at once to part with him +and to give up his own greatest comfort and benefit for the sake of the +welfare of the little lad. He did not know how fond he was of the +child until it became necessary to let him go away. When he was gone, +he felt more sad and downcast than he cared to own--far sadder than the +boy himself, who was happy enough to enter a new career and find +companions of his own age. Becky burst out laughing once or twice when +the Colonel, in his clumsy, incoherent way, tried to express his +sentimental sorrows at the boy's departure. The poor fellow felt that +his dearest pleasure and closest friend was taken from him. He looked +often and wistfully at the little vacant bed in his dressing-room, +where the child used to sleep. He missed him sadly of mornings and +tried in vain to walk in the park without him. He did not know how +solitary he was until little Rawdon was gone. He liked the people who +were fond of him, and would go and sit for long hours with his +good-natured sister Lady Jane, and talk to her about the virtues, and +good looks, and hundred good qualities of the child. + +Young Rawdon's aunt, we have said, was very fond of him, as was her +little girl, who wept copiously when the time for her cousin's +departure came. The elder Rawdon was thankful for the fondness of +mother and daughter. The very best and honestest feelings of the man +came out in these artless outpourings of paternal feeling in which he +indulged in their presence, and encouraged by their sympathy. He +secured not only Lady Jane's kindness, but her sincere regard, by the +feelings which he manifested, and which he could not show to his own +wife. The two kinswomen met as seldom as possible. Becky laughed +bitterly at Jane's feelings and softness; the other's kindly and gentle +nature could not but revolt at her sister's callous behaviour. + +It estranged Rawdon from his wife more than he knew or acknowledged to +himself. She did not care for the estrangement. Indeed, she did not +miss him or anybody. She looked upon him as her errand-man and humble +slave. He might be ever so depressed or sulky, and she did not mark +his demeanour, or only treated it with a sneer. She was busy thinking +about her position, or her pleasures, or her advancement in society; +she ought to have held a great place in it, that is certain. + +It was honest Briggs who made up the little kit for the boy which he +was to take to school. Molly, the housemaid, blubbered in the passage +when he went away--Molly kind and faithful in spite of a long arrear of +unpaid wages. Mrs. Becky could not let her husband have the carriage +to take the boy to school. Take the horses into the City!--such a +thing was never heard of. Let a cab be brought. She did not offer to +kiss him when he went, nor did the child propose to embrace her; but +gave a kiss to old Briggs (whom, in general, he was very shy of +caressing), and consoled her by pointing out that he was to come home +on Saturdays, when she would have the benefit of seeing him. As the +cab rolled towards the City, Becky's carriage rattled off to the park. +She was chattering and laughing with a score of young dandies by the +Serpentine as the father and son entered at the old gates of the +school--where Rawdon left the child and came away with a sadder purer +feeling in his heart than perhaps that poor battered fellow had ever +known since he himself came out of the nursery. + +He walked all the way home very dismally, and dined alone with Briggs. +He was very kind to her and grateful for her love and watchfulness over +the boy. His conscience smote him that he had borrowed Briggs's money +and aided in deceiving her. They talked about little Rawdon a long +time, for Becky only came home to dress and go out to dinner--and then +he went off uneasily to drink tea with Lady Jane, and tell her of what +had happened, and how little Rawdon went off like a trump, and how he +was to wear a gown and little knee-breeches, and how young Blackball, +Jack Blackball's son, of the old regiment, had taken him in charge and +promised to be kind to him. + +In the course of a week, young Blackball had constituted little Rawdon +his fag, shoe-black, and breakfast toaster; initiated him into the +mysteries of the Latin Grammar; and thrashed him three or four times, +but not severely. The little chap's good-natured honest face won his +way for him. He only got that degree of beating which was, no doubt, +good for him; and as for blacking shoes, toasting bread, and fagging in +general, were these offices not deemed to be necessary parts of every +young English gentleman's education? + +Our business does not lie with the second generation and Master +Rawdon's life at school, otherwise the present tale might be carried to +any indefinite length. The Colonel went to see his son a short time +afterwards and found the lad sufficiently well and happy, grinning and +laughing in his little black gown and little breeches. + +His father sagaciously tipped Blackball, his master, a sovereign, and +secured that young gentleman's good-will towards his fag. As a protege +of the great Lord Steyne, the nephew of a County member, and son of a +Colonel and C.B., whose name appeared in some of the most fashionable +parties in the Morning Post, perhaps the school authorities were +disposed not to look unkindly on the child. He had plenty of +pocket-money, which he spent in treating his comrades royally to +raspberry tarts, and he was often allowed to come home on Saturdays to +his father, who always made a jubilee of that day. When free, Rawdon +would take him to the play, or send him thither with the footman; and +on Sundays he went to church with Briggs and Lady Jane and his cousins. +Rawdon marvelled over his stories about school, and fights, and +fagging. Before long, he knew the names of all the masters and the +principal boys as well as little Rawdon himself. He invited little +Rawdon's crony from school, and made both the children sick with +pastry, and oysters, and porter after the play. He tried to look +knowing over the Latin grammar when little Rawdon showed him what part +of that work he was "in." "Stick to it, my boy," he said to him with +much gravity, "there's nothing like a good classical education! +Nothing!" + +Becky's contempt for her husband grew greater every day. "Do what you +like--dine where you please--go and have ginger-beer and sawdust at +Astley's, or psalm-singing with Lady Jane--only don't expect me to busy +myself with the boy. I have your interests to attend to, as you can't +attend to them yourself. I should like to know where you would have +been now, and in what sort of a position in society, if I had not +looked after you." Indeed, nobody wanted poor old Rawdon at the parties +whither Becky used to go. She was often asked without him now. She +talked about great people as if she had the fee-simple of May Fair, and +when the Court went into mourning, she always wore black. + +Little Rawdon being disposed of, Lord Steyne, who took such a parental +interest in the affairs of this amiable poor family, thought that their +expenses might be very advantageously curtailed by the departure of +Miss Briggs, and that Becky was quite clever enough to take the +management of her own house. It has been narrated in a former chapter +how the benevolent nobleman had given his protegee money to pay off her +little debt to Miss Briggs, who however still remained behind with her +friends; whence my lord came to the painful conclusion that Mrs. +Crawley had made some other use of the money confided to her than that +for which her generous patron had given the loan. However, Lord Steyne +was not so rude as to impart his suspicions upon this head to Mrs. +Becky, whose feelings might be hurt by any controversy on the +money-question, and who might have a thousand painful reasons for +disposing otherwise of his lordship's generous loan. But he determined +to satisfy himself of the real state of the case, and instituted the +necessary inquiries in a most cautious and delicate manner. + +In the first place he took an early opportunity of pumping Miss Briggs. +That was not a difficult operation. A very little encouragement would +set that worthy woman to talk volubly and pour out all within her. And +one day when Mrs. Rawdon had gone out to drive (as Mr. Fiche, his +lordship's confidential servant, easily learned at the livery stables +where the Crawleys kept their carriage and horses, or rather, where the +livery-man kept a carriage and horses for Mr. and Mrs. Crawley)--my +lord dropped in upon the Curzon Street house--asked Briggs for a cup of +coffee--told her that he had good accounts of the little boy at +school--and in five minutes found out from her that Mrs. Rawdon had +given her nothing except a black silk gown, for which Miss Briggs was +immensely grateful. + +He laughed within himself at this artless story. For the truth is, our +dear friend Rebecca had given him a most circumstantial narration of +Briggs's delight at receiving her money--eleven hundred and twenty-five +pounds--and in what securities she had invested it; and what a pang +Becky herself felt in being obliged to pay away such a delightful sum +of money. "Who knows," the dear woman may have thought within herself, +"perhaps he may give me a little more?" My lord, however, made no such +proposal to the little schemer--very likely thinking that he had been +sufficiently generous already. + +He had the curiosity, then, to ask Miss Briggs about the state of her +private affairs--and she told his lordship candidly what her position +was--how Miss Crawley had left her a legacy--how her relatives had had +part of it--how Colonel Crawley had put out another portion, for which +she had the best security and interest--and how Mr. and Mrs. Rawdon +had kindly busied themselves with Sir Pitt, who was to dispose of the +remainder most advantageously for her, when he had time. My lord asked +how much the Colonel had already invested for her, and Miss Briggs at +once and truly told him that the sum was six hundred and odd pounds. + +But as soon as she had told her story, the voluble Briggs repented of +her frankness and besought my lord not to tell Mr. Crawley of the +confessions which she had made. "The Colonel was so kind--Mr. Crawley +might be offended and pay back the money, for which she could get no +such good interest anywhere else." Lord Steyne, laughing, promised he +never would divulge their conversation, and when he and Miss Briggs +parted he laughed still more. + +"What an accomplished little devil it is!" thought he. "What a splendid +actress and manager! She had almost got a second supply out of me the +other day; with her coaxing ways. She beats all the women I have ever +seen in the course of all my well-spent life. They are babies compared +to her. I am a greenhorn myself, and a fool in her hands--an old fool. +She is unsurpassable in lies." His lordship's admiration for Becky rose +immeasurably at this proof of her cleverness. Getting the money was +nothing--but getting double the sum she wanted, and paying nobody--it +was a magnificent stroke. And Crawley, my lord thought--Crawley is not +such a fool as he looks and seems. He has managed the matter cleverly +enough on his side. Nobody would ever have supposed from his face and +demeanour that he knew anything about this money business; and yet he +put her up to it, and has spent the money, no doubt. In this opinion +my lord, we know, was mistaken, but it influenced a good deal his +behaviour towards Colonel Crawley, whom he began to treat with even +less than that semblance of respect which he had formerly shown towards +that gentleman. It never entered into the head of Mrs. Crawley's +patron that the little lady might be making a purse for herself; and, +perhaps, if the truth must be told, he judged of Colonel Crawley by his +experience of other husbands, whom he had known in the course of the +long and well-spent life which had made him acquainted with a great +deal of the weakness of mankind. My lord had bought so many men during +his life that he was surely to be pardoned for supposing that he had +found the price of this one. + +He taxed Becky upon the point on the very first occasion when he met +her alone, and he complimented her, good-humouredly, on her cleverness +in getting more than the money which she required. Becky was only a +little taken aback. It was not the habit of this dear creature to tell +falsehoods, except when necessity compelled, but in these great +emergencies it was her practice to lie very freely; and in an instant +she was ready with another neat plausible circumstantial story which +she administered to her patron. The previous statement which she had +made to him was a falsehood--a wicked falsehood--she owned it. But who +had made her tell it? "Ah, my Lord," she said, "you don't know all I +have to suffer and bear in silence; you see me gay and happy before +you--you little know what I have to endure when there is no protector +near me. It was my husband, by threats and the most savage treatment, +forced me to ask for that sum about which I deceived you. It was he +who, foreseeing that questions might be asked regarding the disposal of +the money, forced me to account for it as I did. He took the money. +He told me he had paid Miss Briggs; I did not want, I did not dare to +doubt him. Pardon the wrong which a desperate man is forced to commit, +and pity a miserable, miserable woman." She burst into tears as she +spoke. Persecuted virtue never looked more bewitchingly wretched. + +They had a long conversation, driving round and round the Regent's Park +in Mrs. Crawley's carriage together, a conversation of which it is not +necessary to repeat the details, but the upshot of it was that, when +Becky came home, she flew to her dear Briggs with a smiling face and +announced that she had some very good news for her. Lord Steyne had +acted in the noblest and most generous manner. He was always thinking +how and when he could do good. Now that little Rawdon was gone to +school, a dear companion and friend was no longer necessary to her. +She was grieved beyond measure to part with Briggs, but her means +required that she should practise every retrenchment, and her sorrow +was mitigated by the idea that her dear Briggs would be far better +provided for by her generous patron than in her humble home. Mrs. +Pilkington, the housekeeper at Gauntly Hall, was growing exceedingly +old, feeble, and rheumatic: she was not equal to the work of +superintending that vast mansion, and must be on the look out for a +successor. It was a splendid position. The family did not go to +Gauntly once in two years. At other times the housekeeper was the +mistress of the magnificent mansion--had four covers daily for her +table; was visited by the clergy and the most respectable people of the +county--was the lady of Gauntly, in fact; and the two last housekeepers +before Mrs. Pilkington had married rectors of Gauntly--but Mrs. P. +could not, being the aunt of the present Rector. The place was not to +be hers yet, but she might go down on a visit to Mrs. Pilkington and +see whether she would like to succeed her. + +What words can paint the ecstatic gratitude of Briggs! All she +stipulated for was that little Rawdon should be allowed to come down +and see her at the Hall. Becky promised this--anything. She ran up to +her husband when he came home and told him the joyful news. Rawdon was +glad, deuced glad; the weight was off his conscience about poor +Briggs's money. She was provided for, at any rate, but--but his mind +was disquiet. He did not seem to be all right, somehow. He told +little Southdown what Lord Steyne had done, and the young man eyed +Crawley with an air which surprised the latter. + +He told Lady Jane of this second proof of Steyne's bounty, and she, +too, looked odd and alarmed; so did Sir Pitt. "She is too clever +and--and gay to be allowed to go from party to party without a +companion," both said. "You must go with her, Rawdon, wherever she +goes, and you must have somebody with her--one of the girls from +Queen's Crawley, perhaps, though they were rather giddy guardians for +her." + +Somebody Becky should have. But in the meantime it was clear that +honest Briggs must not lose her chance of settlement for life, and so +she and her bags were packed, and she set off on her journey. And so +two of Rawdon's out-sentinels were in the hands of the enemy. + +Sir Pitt went and expostulated with his sister-in-law upon the subject +of the dismissal of Briggs and other matters of delicate family +interest. In vain she pointed out to him how necessary was the +protection of Lord Steyne for her poor husband; how cruel it would be +on their part to deprive Briggs of the position offered to her. +Cajolements, coaxings, smiles, tears could not satisfy Sir Pitt, and he +had something very like a quarrel with his once admired Becky. He +spoke of the honour of the family, the unsullied reputation of the +Crawleys; expressed himself in indignant tones about her receiving +those young Frenchmen--those wild young men of fashion, my Lord Steyne +himself, whose carriage was always at her door, who passed hours daily +in her company, and whose constant presence made the world talk about +her. As the head of the house he implored her to be more prudent. +Society was already speaking lightly of her. Lord Steyne, though a +nobleman of the greatest station and talents, was a man whose +attentions would compromise any woman; he besought, he implored, he +commanded his sister-in-law to be watchful in her intercourse with that +nobleman. + +Becky promised anything and everything Pitt wanted; but Lord Steyne +came to her house as often as ever, and Sir Pitt's anger increased. I +wonder was Lady Jane angry or pleased that her husband at last found +fault with his favourite Rebecca? Lord Steyne's visits continuing, his +own ceased, and his wife was for refusing all further intercourse with +that nobleman and declining the invitation to the charade-night which +the marchioness sent to her; but Sir Pitt thought it was necessary to +accept it, as his Royal Highness would be there. + +Although he went to the party in question, Sir Pitt quitted it very +early, and his wife, too, was very glad to come away. Becky hardly so +much as spoke to him or noticed her sister-in-law. Pitt Crawley +declared her behaviour was monstrously indecorous, reprobated in strong +terms the habit of play-acting and fancy dressing as highly unbecoming +a British female, and after the charades were over, took his brother +Rawdon severely to task for appearing himself and allowing his wife to +join in such improper exhibitions. + +Rawdon said she should not join in any more such amusements--but +indeed, and perhaps from hints from his elder brother and sister, he +had already become a very watchful and exemplary domestic character. He +left off his clubs and billiards. He never left home. He took Becky +out to drive; he went laboriously with her to all her parties. Whenever +my Lord Steyne called, he was sure to find the Colonel. And when Becky +proposed to go out without her husband, or received invitations for +herself, he peremptorily ordered her to refuse them: and there was that +in the gentleman's manner which enforced obedience. Little Becky, to +do her justice, was charmed with Rawdon's gallantry. If he was surly, +she never was. Whether friends were present or absent, she had always a +kind smile for him and was attentive to his pleasure and comfort. It +was the early days of their marriage over again: the same good humour, +prevenances, merriment, and artless confidence and regard. "How much +pleasanter it is," she would say, "to have you by my side in the +carriage than that foolish old Briggs! Let us always go on so, dear +Rawdon. How nice it would be, and how happy we should always be, if we +had but the money!" He fell asleep after dinner in his chair; he did +not see the face opposite to him, haggard, weary, and terrible; it +lighted up with fresh candid smiles when he woke. It kissed him gaily. +He wondered that he had ever had suspicions. No, he never had +suspicions; all those dumb doubts and surly misgivings which had been +gathering on his mind were mere idle jealousies. She was fond of him; +she always had been. As for her shining in society, it was no fault of +hers; she was formed to shine there. Was there any woman who could +talk, or sing, or do anything like her? If she would but like the boy! +Rawdon thought. But the mother and son never could be brought together. + +And it was while Rawdon's mind was agitated with these doubts and +perplexities that the incident occurred which was mentioned in the last +chapter, and the unfortunate Colonel found himself a prisoner away from +home. + + + +CHAPTER LIII + +A Rescue and a Catastrophe + +Friend Rawdon drove on then to Mr. Moss's mansion in Cursitor Street, +and was duly inducted into that dismal place of hospitality. Morning +was breaking over the cheerful house-tops of Chancery Lane as the +rattling cab woke up the echoes there. A little pink-eyed Jew-boy, +with a head as ruddy as the rising morn, let the party into the house, +and Rawdon was welcomed to the ground-floor apartments by Mr. Moss, his +travelling companion and host, who cheerfully asked him if he would +like a glass of something warm after his drive. + +The Colonel was not so depressed as some mortals would be, who, +quitting a palace and a placens uxor, find themselves barred into a +spunging-house; for, if the truth must be told, he had been a lodger at +Mr. Moss's establishment once or twice before. We have not thought it +necessary in the previous course of this narrative to mention these +trivial little domestic incidents: but the reader may be assured that +they can't unfrequently occur in the life of a man who lives on nothing +a year. + +Upon his first visit to Mr. Moss, the Colonel, then a bachelor, had +been liberated by the generosity of his aunt; on the second mishap, +little Becky, with the greatest spirit and kindness, had borrowed a sum +of money from Lord Southdown and had coaxed her husband's creditor (who +was her shawl, velvet-gown, lace pocket-handkerchief, trinket, and +gim-crack purveyor, indeed) to take a portion of the sum claimed and +Rawdon's promissory note for the remainder: so on both these occasions +the capture and release had been conducted with the utmost gallantry on +all sides, and Moss and the Colonel were therefore on the very best of +terms. + +"You'll find your old bed, Colonel, and everything comfortable," that +gentleman said, "as I may honestly say. You may be pretty sure its kep +aired, and by the best of company, too. It was slep in the night afore +last by the Honorable Capting Famish, of the Fiftieth Dragoons, whose +Mar took him out, after a fortnight, jest to punish him, she said. +But, Law bless you, I promise you, he punished my champagne, and had a +party ere every night--reglar tip-top swells, down from the clubs and +the West End--Capting Ragg, the Honorable Deuceace, who lives in the +Temple, and some fellers as knows a good glass of wine, I warrant you. +I've got a Doctor of Diwinity upstairs, five gents in the coffee-room, +and Mrs. Moss has a tably-dy-hoty at half-past five, and a little +cards or music afterwards, when we shall be most happy to see you." + +"I'll ring when I want anything," said Rawdon and went quietly to his +bedroom. He was an old soldier, we have said, and not to be disturbed +by any little shocks of fate. A weaker man would have sent off a +letter to his wife on the instant of his capture. "But what is the use +of disturbing her night's rest?" thought Rawdon. "She won't know +whether I am in my room or not. It will be time enough to write to her +when she has had her sleep out, and I have had mine. It's only a +hundred-and-seventy, and the deuce is in it if we can't raise that." +And so, thinking about little Rawdon (whom he would not have know that +he was in such a queer place), the Colonel turned into the bed lately +occupied by Captain Famish and fell asleep. It was ten o'clock when he +woke up, and the ruddy-headed youth brought him, with conscious pride, +a fine silver dressing-case, wherewith he might perform the operation +of shaving. Indeed Mr. Moss's house, though somewhat dirty, was +splendid throughout. There were dirty trays, and wine-coolers en +permanence on the sideboard, huge dirty gilt cornices, with dingy +yellow satin hangings to the barred windows which looked into Cursitor +Street--vast and dirty gilt picture frames surrounding pieces sporting +and sacred, all of which works were by the greatest masters--and +fetched the greatest prices, too, in the bill transactions, in the +course of which they were sold and bought over and over again. The +Colonel's breakfast was served to him in the same dingy and gorgeous +plated ware. Miss Moss, a dark-eyed maid in curl-papers, appeared with +the teapot, and, smiling, asked the Colonel how he had slep? And she +brought him in the Morning Post, with the names of all the great people +who had figured at Lord Steyne's entertainment the night before. It +contained a brilliant account of the festivities and of the beautiful +and accomplished Mrs. Rawdon Crawley's admirable personifications. + +After a lively chat with this lady (who sat on the edge of the +breakfast table in an easy attitude displaying the drapery of her +stocking and an ex-white satin shoe, which was down at heel), Colonel +Crawley called for pens and ink, and paper, and being asked how many +sheets, chose one which was brought to him between Miss Moss's own +finger and thumb. Many a sheet had that dark-eyed damsel brought in; +many a poor fellow had scrawled and blotted hurried lines of entreaty +and paced up and down that awful room until his messenger brought back +the reply. Poor men always use messengers instead of the post. Who +has not had their letters, with the wafers wet, and the announcement +that a person is waiting in the hall? + +Now on the score of his application, Rawdon had not many misgivings. + +DEAR BECKY, (Rawdon wrote) + +I HOPE YOU SLEPT WELL. Don't be FRIGHTENED if I don't bring you in +your COFFY. Last night as I was coming home smoaking, I met with an +ACCADENT. I was NABBED by Moss of Cursitor Street--from whose GILT AND +SPLENDID PARLER I write this--the same that had me this time two years. +Miss Moss brought in my tea--she is grown very FAT, and, as usual, had +her STOCKENS DOWN AT HEAL. + +It's Nathan's business--a hundred-and-fifty--with costs, +hundred-and-seventy. Please send me my desk and some CLOTHS--I'm in +pumps and a white tye (something like Miss M's stockings)--I've seventy +in it. And as soon as you get this, Drive to Nathan's--offer him +seventy-five down, and ASK HIM TO RENEW--say I'll take wine--we may as +well have some dinner sherry; but not PICTURS, they're too dear. + +If he won't stand it. Take my ticker and such of your things as you +can SPARE, and send them to Balls--we must, of coarse, have the sum +to-night. It won't do to let it stand over, as to-morrow's Sunday; the +beds here are not very CLEAN, and there may be other things out against +me--I'm glad it an't Rawdon's Saturday for coming home. God bless you. + +Yours in haste, R. C. P.S. Make haste and come. + +This letter, sealed with a wafer, was dispatched by one of the +messengers who are always hanging about Mr. Moss's establishment, and +Rawdon, having seen him depart, went out in the court-yard and smoked +his cigar with a tolerably easy mind--in spite of the bars +overhead--for Mr. Moss's court-yard is railed in like a cage, lest the +gentlemen who are boarding with him should take a fancy to escape from +his hospitality. + +Three hours, he calculated, would be the utmost time required, before +Becky should arrive and open his prison doors, and he passed these +pretty cheerfully in smoking, in reading the paper, and in the +coffee-room with an acquaintance, Captain Walker, who happened to be +there, and with whom he cut for sixpences for some hours, with pretty +equal luck on either side. + +But the day passed away and no messenger returned--no Becky. Mr. +Moss's tably-dy-hoty was served at the appointed hour of half-past +five, when such of the gentlemen lodging in the house as could afford +to pay for the banquet came and partook of it in the splendid front +parlour before described, and with which Mr. Crawley's temporary +lodging communicated, when Miss M. (Miss Hem, as her papa called her) +appeared without the curl-papers of the morning, and Mrs. Hem did the +honours of a prime boiled leg of mutton and turnips, of which the +Colonel ate with a very faint appetite. Asked whether he would "stand" +a bottle of champagne for the company, he consented, and the ladies +drank to his 'ealth, and Mr. Moss, in the most polite manner, "looked +towards him." + +In the midst of this repast, however, the doorbell was heard--young +Moss of the ruddy hair rose up with the keys and answered the summons, +and coming back, told the Colonel that the messenger had returned with +a bag, a desk and a letter, which he gave him. "No ceramony, Colonel, +I beg," said Mrs. Moss with a wave of her hand, and he opened the +letter rather tremulously. It was a beautiful letter, highly scented, +on a pink paper, and with a light green seal. + +MON PAUVRE CHER PETIT, (Mrs. Crawley wrote) + +I could not sleep ONE WINK for thinking of what had become of my odious +old monstre, and only got to rest in the morning after sending for Mr. +Blench (for I was in a fever), who gave me a composing draught and left +orders with Finette that I should be disturbed ON NO ACCOUNT. So that +my poor old man's messenger, who had bien mauvaise mine Finette says, +and sentoit le Genievre, remained in the hall for some hours waiting my +bell. You may fancy my state when I read your poor dear old ill-spelt +letter. + +Ill as I was, I instantly called for the carriage, and as soon as I was +dressed (though I couldn't drink a drop of chocolate--I assure you I +couldn't without my monstre to bring it to me), I drove ventre a terre +to Nathan's. I saw him--I wept--I cried--I fell at his odious knees. +Nothing would mollify the horrid man. He would have all the money, he +said, or keep my poor monstre in prison. I drove home with the +intention of paying that triste visite chez mon oncle (when every +trinket I have should be at your disposal though they would not fetch a +hundred pounds, for some, you know, are with ce cher oncle already), +and found Milor there with the Bulgarian old sheep-faced monster, who +had come to compliment me upon last night's performances. Paddington +came in, too, drawling and lisping and twiddling his hair; so did +Champignac, and his chef--everybody with foison of compliments and +pretty speeches--plaguing poor me, who longed to be rid of them, and +was thinking every moment of the time of mon pauvre prisonnier. + +When they were gone, I went down on my knees to Milor; told him we were +going to pawn everything, and begged and prayed him to give me two +hundred pounds. He pish'd and psha'd in a fury--told me not to be such +a fool as to pawn--and said he would see whether he could lend me the +money. At last he went away, promising that he would send it me in the +morning: when I will bring it to my poor old monster with a kiss from +his affectionate + +BECKY + +I am writing in bed. Oh I have such a headache and such a heartache! + +When Rawdon read over this letter, he turned so red and looked so +savage that the company at the table d'hote easily perceived that bad +news had reached him. All his suspicions, which he had been trying to +banish, returned upon him. She could not even go out and sell her +trinkets to free him. She could laugh and talk about compliments paid +to her, whilst he was in prison. Who had put him there? Wenham had +walked with him. Was there.... He could hardly bear to think of what +he suspected. Leaving the room hurriedly, he ran into his own--opened +his desk, wrote two hurried lines, which he directed to Sir Pitt or +Lady Crawley, and bade the messenger carry them at once to Gaunt +Street, bidding him to take a cab, and promising him a guinea if he was +back in an hour. + +In the note he besought his dear brother and sister, for the sake of +God, for the sake of his dear child and his honour, to come to him and +relieve him from his difficulty. He was in prison, he wanted a hundred +pounds to set him free--he entreated them to come to him. + +He went back to the dining-room after dispatching his messenger and +called for more wine. He laughed and talked with a strange +boisterousness, as the people thought. Sometimes he laughed madly at +his own fears and went on drinking for an hour, listening all the while +for the carriage which was to bring his fate back. + +At the expiration of that time, wheels were heard whirling up to the +gate--the young janitor went out with his gate-keys. It was a lady +whom he let in at the bailiff's door. + +"Colonel Crawley," she said, trembling very much. He, with a knowing +look, locked the outer door upon her--then unlocked and opened the +inner one, and calling out, "Colonel, you're wanted," led her into the +back parlour, which he occupied. + +Rawdon came in from the dining-parlour where all those people were +carousing, into his back room; a flare of coarse light following him +into the apartment where the lady stood, still very nervous. + +"It is I, Rawdon," she said in a timid voice, which she strove to +render cheerful. "It is Jane." Rawdon was quite overcome by that kind +voice and presence. He ran up to her--caught her in his arms--gasped +out some inarticulate words of thanks and fairly sobbed on her +shoulder. She did not know the cause of his emotion. + +The bills of Mr. Moss were quickly settled, perhaps to the +disappointment of that gentleman, who had counted on having the Colonel +as his guest over Sunday at least; and Jane, with beaming smiles and +happiness in her eyes, carried away Rawdon from the bailiff's house, +and they went homewards in the cab in which she had hastened to his +release. "Pitt was gone to a parliamentary dinner," she said, "when +Rawdon's note came, and so, dear Rawdon, I--I came myself"; and she put +her kind hand in his. Perhaps it was well for Rawdon Crawley that Pitt +was away at that dinner. Rawdon thanked his sister a hundred times, +and with an ardour of gratitude which touched and almost alarmed that +soft-hearted woman. "Oh," said he, in his rude, artless way, "you--you +don't know how I'm changed since I've known you, and--and little Rawdy. +I--I'd like to change somehow. You see I want--I want--to be--" He did +not finish the sentence, but she could interpret it. And that night +after he left her, and as she sat by her own little boy's bed, she +prayed humbly for that poor way-worn sinner. + +Rawdon left her and walked home rapidly. It was nine o'clock at night. +He ran across the streets and the great squares of Vanity Fair, and at +length came up breathless opposite his own house. He started back and +fell against the railings, trembling as he looked up. The drawing-room +windows were blazing with light. She had said that she was in bed and +ill. He stood there for some time, the light from the rooms on his +pale face. + +He took out his door-key and let himself into the house. He could hear +laughter in the upper rooms. He was in the ball-dress in which he had +been captured the night before. He went silently up the stairs, +leaning against the banisters at the stair-head. Nobody was stirring +in the house besides--all the servants had been sent away. Rawdon heard +laughter within--laughter and singing. Becky was singing a snatch of +the song of the night before; a hoarse voice shouted "Brava! +Brava!"--it was Lord Steyne's. + +Rawdon opened the door and went in. A little table with a dinner was +laid out--and wine and plate. Steyne was hanging over the sofa on +which Becky sat. The wretched woman was in a brilliant full toilette, +her arms and all her fingers sparkling with bracelets and rings, and +the brilliants on her breast which Steyne had given her. He had her +hand in his, and was bowing over it to kiss it, when Becky started up +with a faint scream as she caught sight of Rawdon's white face. At the +next instant she tried a smile, a horrid smile, as if to welcome her +husband; and Steyne rose up, grinding his teeth, pale, and with fury in +his looks. + +He, too, attempted a laugh--and came forward holding out his hand. +"What, come back! How d'ye do, Crawley?" he said, the nerves of his +mouth twitching as he tried to grin at the intruder. + +There was that in Rawdon's face which caused Becky to fling herself +before him. "I am innocent, Rawdon," she said; "before God, I am +innocent." She clung hold of his coat, of his hands; her own were all +covered with serpents, and rings, and baubles. "I am innocent. Say I +am innocent," she said to Lord Steyne. + +He thought a trap had been laid for him, and was as furious with the +wife as with the husband. "You innocent! Damn you," he screamed out. +"You innocent! Why every trinket you have on your body is paid for by +me. I have given you thousands of pounds, which this fellow has spent +and for which he has sold you. Innocent, by ----! You're as innocent as +your mother, the ballet-girl, and your husband the bully. Don't think +to frighten me as you have done others. Make way, sir, and let me +pass"; and Lord Steyne seized up his hat, and, with flame in his eyes, +and looking his enemy fiercely in the face, marched upon him, never for +a moment doubting that the other would give way. + +But Rawdon Crawley springing out, seized him by the neckcloth, until +Steyne, almost strangled, writhed and bent under his arm. "You lie, +you dog!" said Rawdon. "You lie, you coward and villain!" And he struck +the Peer twice over the face with his open hand and flung him bleeding +to the ground. It was all done before Rebecca could interpose. She +stood there trembling before him. She admired her husband, strong, +brave, and victorious. + +"Come here," he said. She came up at once. + +"Take off those things." She began, trembling, pulling the jewels from +her arms, and the rings from her shaking fingers, and held them all in +a heap, quivering and looking up at him. "Throw them down," he said, +and she dropped them. He tore the diamond ornament out of her breast +and flung it at Lord Steyne. It cut him on his bald forehead. Steyne +wore the scar to his dying day. + +"Come upstairs," Rawdon said to his wife. "Don't kill me, Rawdon," she +said. He laughed savagely. "I want to see if that man lies about the +money as he has about me. Has he given you any?" + +"No," said Rebecca, "that is--" + +"Give me your keys," Rawdon answered, and they went out together. + +Rebecca gave him all the keys but one, and she was in hopes that he +would not have remarked the absence of that. It belonged to the little +desk which Amelia had given her in early days, and which she kept in a +secret place. But Rawdon flung open boxes and wardrobes, throwing the +multifarious trumpery of their contents here and there, and at last he +found the desk. The woman was forced to open it. It contained papers, +love-letters many years old--all sorts of small trinkets and woman's +memoranda. And it contained a pocket-book with bank-notes. Some of +these were dated ten years back, too, and one was quite a fresh one--a +note for a thousand pounds which Lord Steyne had given her. + +"Did he give you this?" Rawdon said. + +"Yes," Rebecca answered. + +"I'll send it to him to-day," Rawdon said (for day had dawned again, +and many hours had passed in this search), "and I will pay Briggs, who +was kind to the boy, and some of the debts. You will let me know where +I shall send the rest to you. You might have spared me a hundred +pounds, Becky, out of all this--I have always shared with you." + +"I am innocent," said Becky. And he left her without another word. + +What were her thoughts when he left her? She remained for hours after +he was gone, the sunshine pouring into the room, and Rebecca sitting +alone on the bed's edge. The drawers were all opened and their +contents scattered about--dresses and feathers, scarfs and trinkets, a +heap of tumbled vanities lying in a wreck. Her hair was falling over +her shoulders; her gown was torn where Rawdon had wrenched the +brilliants out of it. She heard him go downstairs a few minutes after +he left her, and the door slamming and closing on him. She knew he +would never come back. He was gone forever. Would he kill +himself?--she thought--not until after he had met Lord Steyne. She +thought of her long past life, and all the dismal incidents of it. Ah, +how dreary it seemed, how miserable, lonely and profitless! Should she +take laudanum, and end it, to have done with all hopes, schemes, debts, +and triumphs? The French maid found her in this position--sitting in +the midst of her miserable ruins with clasped hands and dry eyes. The +woman was her accomplice and in Steyne's pay. "Mon Dieu, madame, what +has happened?" she asked. + +What had happened? Was she guilty or not? She said not, but who could +tell what was truth which came from those lips, or if that corrupt +heart was in this case pure? + +All her lies and her schemes, and her selfishness and her wiles, all her +wit and genius had come to this bankruptcy. The woman closed the +curtains and, with some entreaty and show of kindness, persuaded her +mistress to lie down on the bed. Then she went below and gathered up +the trinkets which had been lying on the floor since Rebecca dropped +them there at her husband's orders, and Lord Steyne went away. + + + +CHAPTER LIV + +Sunday After the Battle + +The mansion of Sir Pitt Crawley, in Great Gaunt Street, was just +beginning to dress itself for the day, as Rawdon, in his evening +costume, which he had now worn two days, passed by the scared female +who was scouring the steps and entered into his brother's study. Lady +Jane, in her morning-gown, was up and above stairs in the nursery +superintending the toilettes of her children and listening to the +morning prayers which the little creatures performed at her knee. +Every morning she and they performed this duty privately, and before +the public ceremonial at which Sir Pitt presided and at which all the +people of the household were expected to assemble. Rawdon sat down in +the study before the Baronet's table, set out with the orderly blue +books and the letters, the neatly docketed bills and symmetrical +pamphlets, the locked account-books, desks, and dispatch boxes, the +Bible, the Quarterly Review, and the Court Guide, which all stood as if +on parade awaiting the inspection of their chief. + +A book of family sermons, one of which Sir Pitt was in the habit of +administering to his family on Sunday mornings, lay ready on the study +table, and awaiting his judicious selection. And by the sermon-book +was the Observer newspaper, damp and neatly folded, and for Sir Pitt's +own private use. His gentleman alone took the opportunity of perusing +the newspaper before he laid it by his master's desk. Before he had +brought it into the study that morning, he had read in the journal a +flaming account of "Festivities at Gaunt House," with the names of all +the distinguished personages invited by the Marquis of Steyne to meet +his Royal Highness. Having made comments upon this entertainment to +the housekeeper and her niece as they were taking early tea and hot +buttered toast in the former lady's apartment, and wondered how the +Rawding Crawleys could git on, the valet had damped and folded the +paper once more, so that it looked quite fresh and innocent against the +arrival of the master of the house. + +Poor Rawdon took up the paper and began to try and read it until his +brother should arrive. But the print fell blank upon his eyes, and he +did not know in the least what he was reading. The Government news and +appointments (which Sir Pitt as a public man was bound to peruse, +otherwise he would by no means permit the introduction of Sunday papers +into his household), the theatrical criticisms, the fight for a hundred +pounds a side between the Barking Butcher and the Tutbury Pet, the +Gaunt House chronicle itself, which contained a most complimentary +though guarded account of the famous charades of which Mrs. Becky had +been the heroine--all these passed as in a haze before Rawdon, as he +sat waiting the arrival of the chief of the family. + +Punctually, as the shrill-toned bell of the black marble study clock +began to chime nine, Sir Pitt made his appearance, fresh, neat, smugly +shaved, with a waxy clean face, and stiff shirt collar, his scanty hair +combed and oiled, trimming his nails as he descended the stairs +majestically, in a starched cravat and a grey flannel dressing-gown--a +real old English gentleman, in a word--a model of neatness and every +propriety. He started when he saw poor Rawdon in his study in tumbled +clothes, with blood-shot eyes, and his hair over his face. He thought +his brother was not sober, and had been out all night on some orgy. +"Good gracious, Rawdon," he said, with a blank face, "what brings you +here at this time of the morning? Why ain't you at home?" + +"Home," said Rawdon with a wild laugh. "Don't be frightened, Pitt. I'm +not drunk. Shut the door; I want to speak to you." + +Pitt closed the door and came up to the table, where he sat down in the +other arm-chair--that one placed for the reception of the steward, +agent, or confidential visitor who came to transact business with the +Baronet--and trimmed his nails more vehemently than ever. + +"Pitt, it's all over with me," the Colonel said after a pause. "I'm +done." + +"I always said it would come to this," the Baronet cried peevishly, and +beating a tune with his clean-trimmed nails. "I warned you a thousand +times. I can't help you any more. Every shilling of my money is tied +up. Even the hundred pounds that Jane took you last night were +promised to my lawyer to-morrow morning, and the want of it will put me +to great inconvenience. I don't mean to say that I won't assist you +ultimately. But as for paying your creditors in full, I might as well +hope to pay the National Debt. It is madness, sheer madness, to think +of such a thing. You must come to a compromise. It's a painful thing +for the family, but everybody does it. There was George Kitely, Lord +Ragland's son, went through the Court last week, and was what they call +whitewashed, I believe. Lord Ragland would not pay a shilling for him, +and--" + +"It's not money I want," Rawdon broke in. "I'm not come to you about +myself. Never mind what happens to me." + +"What is the matter, then?" said Pitt, somewhat relieved. + +"It's the boy," said Rawdon in a husky voice. "I want you to promise +me that you will take charge of him when I'm gone. That dear good wife +of yours has always been good to him; and he's fonder of her than he is +of his . . .--Damn it. Look here, Pitt--you know that I was to have +had Miss Crawley's money. I wasn't brought up like a younger brother, +but was always encouraged to be extravagant and kep idle. But for this +I might have been quite a different man. I didn't do my duty with the +regiment so bad. You know how I was thrown over about the money, and +who got it." + +"After the sacrifices I have made, and the manner in which I have stood +by you, I think this sort of reproach is useless," Sir Pitt said. +"Your marriage was your own doing, not mine." + +"That's over now," said Rawdon. "That's over now." And the words were +wrenched from him with a groan, which made his brother start. + +"Good God! is she dead?" Sir Pitt said with a voice of genuine alarm +and commiseration. + +"I wish I was," Rawdon replied. "If it wasn't for little Rawdon I'd +have cut my throat this morning--and that damned villain's too." + +Sir Pitt instantly guessed the truth and surmised that Lord Steyne was +the person whose life Rawdon wished to take. The Colonel told his +senior briefly, and in broken accents, the circumstances of the case. +"It was a regular plan between that scoundrel and her," he said. "The +bailiffs were put upon me; I was taken as I was going out of his house; +when I wrote to her for money, she said she was ill in bed and put me +off to another day. And when I got home I found her in diamonds and +sitting with that villain alone." He then went on to describe hurriedly +the personal conflict with Lord Steyne. To an affair of that nature, +of course, he said, there was but one issue, and after his conference +with his brother, he was going away to make the necessary arrangements +for the meeting which must ensue. "And as it may end fatally with me," +Rawdon said with a broken voice, "and as the boy has no mother, I must +leave him to you and Jane, Pitt--only it will be a comfort to me if you +will promise me to be his friend." + +The elder brother was much affected, and shook Rawdon's hand with a +cordiality seldom exhibited by him. Rawdon passed his hand over his +shaggy eyebrows. "Thank you, brother," said he. "I know I can trust +your word." + +"I will, upon my honour," the Baronet said. And thus, and almost +mutely, this bargain was struck between them. + +Then Rawdon took out of his pocket the little pocket-book which he had +discovered in Becky's desk, and from which he drew a bundle of the +notes which it contained. "Here's six hundred," he said--"you didn't +know I was so rich. I want you to give the money to Briggs, who lent +it to us--and who was kind to the boy--and I've always felt ashamed of +having taken the poor old woman's money. And here's some more--I've +only kept back a few pounds--which Becky may as well have, to get on +with." As he spoke he took hold of the other notes to give to his +brother, but his hands shook, and he was so agitated that the +pocket-book fell from him, and out of it the thousand-pound note which +had been the last of the unlucky Becky's winnings. + +Pitt stooped and picked them up, amazed at so much wealth. "Not that," +Rawdon said. "I hope to put a bullet into the man whom that belongs +to." He had thought to himself, it would be a fine revenge to wrap a +ball in the note and kill Steyne with it. + +After this colloquy the brothers once more shook hands and parted. Lady +Jane had heard of the Colonel's arrival, and was waiting for her +husband in the adjoining dining-room, with female instinct, auguring +evil. The door of the dining-room happened to be left open, and the +lady of course was issuing from it as the two brothers passed out of +the study. She held out her hand to Rawdon and said she was glad he +was come to breakfast, though she could perceive, by his haggard +unshorn face and the dark looks of her husband, that there was very +little question of breakfast between them. Rawdon muttered some +excuses about an engagement, squeezing hard the timid little hand which +his sister-in-law reached out to him. Her imploring eyes could read +nothing but calamity in his face, but he went away without another +word. Nor did Sir Pitt vouchsafe her any explanation. The children +came up to salute him, and he kissed them in his usual frigid manner. +The mother took both of them close to herself, and held a hand of each +of them as they knelt down to prayers, which Sir Pitt read to them, and +to the servants in their Sunday suits or liveries, ranged upon chairs +on the other side of the hissing tea-urn. Breakfast was so late that +day, in consequence of the delays which had occurred, that the +church-bells began to ring whilst they were sitting over their meal; +and Lady Jane was too ill, she said, to go to church, though her +thoughts had been entirely astray during the period of family devotion. + +Rawdon Crawley meanwhile hurried on from Great Gaunt Street, and +knocking at the great bronze Medusa's head which stands on the portal +of Gaunt House, brought out the purple Silenus in a red and silver +waistcoat who acts as porter of that palace. The man was scared also +by the Colonel's dishevelled appearance, and barred the way as if +afraid that the other was going to force it. But Colonel Crawley only +took out a card and enjoined him particularly to send it in to Lord +Steyne, and to mark the address written on it, and say that Colonel +Crawley would be all day after one o'clock at the Regent Club in St. +James's Street--not at home. The fat red-faced man looked after him +with astonishment as he strode away; so did the people in their Sunday +clothes who were out so early; the charity-boys with shining faces, +the greengrocer lolling at his door, and the publican shutting his +shutters in the sunshine, against service commenced. The people joked +at the cab-stand about his appearance, as he took a carriage there, and +told the driver to drive him to Knightsbridge Barracks. + +All the bells were jangling and tolling as he reached that place. He +might have seen his old acquaintance Amelia on her way from Brompton to +Russell Square, had he been looking out. Troops of schools were on +their march to church, the shiny pavement and outsides of coaches in +the suburbs were thronged with people out upon their Sunday pleasure; +but the Colonel was much too busy to take any heed of these phenomena, +and, arriving at Knightsbridge, speedily made his way up to the room of +his old friend and comrade Captain Macmurdo, who Crawley found, to his +satisfaction, was in barracks. + +Captain Macmurdo, a veteran officer and Waterloo man, greatly liked by +his regiment, in which want of money alone prevented him from attaining +the highest ranks, was enjoying the forenoon calmly in bed. He had +been at a fast supper-party, given the night before by Captain the +Honourable George Cinqbars, at his house in Brompton Square, to several +young men of the regiment, and a number of ladies of the corps de +ballet, and old Mac, who was at home with people of all ages and ranks, +and consorted with generals, dog-fanciers, opera-dancers, bruisers, and +every kind of person, in a word, was resting himself after the night's +labours, and, not being on duty, was in bed. + +His room was hung round with boxing, sporting, and dancing pictures, +presented to him by comrades as they retired from the regiment, and +married and settled into quiet life. And as he was now nearly fifty +years of age, twenty-four of which he had passed in the corps, he had a +singular museum. He was one of the best shots in England, and, for a +heavy man, one of the best riders; indeed, he and Crawley had been +rivals when the latter was in the Army. To be brief, Mr. Macmurdo was +lying in bed, reading in Bell's Life an account of that very fight +between the Tutbury Pet and the Barking Butcher, which has been before +mentioned--a venerable bristly warrior, with a little close-shaved grey +head, with a silk nightcap, a red face and nose, and a great dyed +moustache. + +When Rawdon told the Captain he wanted a friend, the latter knew +perfectly well on what duty of friendship he was called to act, and +indeed had conducted scores of affairs for his acquaintances with the +greatest prudence and skill. His Royal Highness the late lamented +Commander-in-Chief had had the greatest regard for Macmurdo on this +account, and he was the common refuge of gentlemen in trouble. + +"What's the row about, Crawley, my boy?" said the old warrior. "No +more gambling business, hay, like that when we shot Captain Marker?" + +"It's about--about my wife," Crawley answered, casting down his eyes +and turning very red. + +The other gave a whistle. "I always said she'd throw you over," he +began--indeed there were bets in the regiment and at the clubs +regarding the probable fate of Colonel Crawley, so lightly was his +wife's character esteemed by his comrades and the world; but seeing the +savage look with which Rawdon answered the expression of this opinion, +Macmurdo did not think fit to enlarge upon it further. + +"Is there no way out of it, old boy?" the Captain continued in a grave +tone. "Is it only suspicion, you know, or--or what is it? Any letters? +Can't you keep it quiet? Best not make any noise about a thing of that +sort if you can help it." "Think of his only finding her out now," the +Captain thought to himself, and remembered a hundred particular +conversations at the mess-table, in which Mrs. Crawley's reputation had +been torn to shreds. + +"There's no way but one out of it," Rawdon replied--"and there's only a +way out of it for one of us, Mac--do you understand? I was put out of +the way--arrested--I found 'em alone together. I told him he was a +liar and a coward, and knocked him down and thrashed him." + +"Serve him right," Macmurdo said. "Who is it?" + +Rawdon answered it was Lord Steyne. + +"The deuce! a Marquis! they said he--that is, they said you--" + +"What the devil do you mean?" roared out Rawdon; "do you mean that you +ever heard a fellow doubt about my wife and didn't tell me, Mac?" + +"The world's very censorious, old boy," the other replied. "What the +deuce was the good of my telling you what any tom-fools talked about?" + +"It was damned unfriendly, Mac," said Rawdon, quite overcome; and, +covering his face with his hands, he gave way to an emotion, the sight +of which caused the tough old campaigner opposite him to wince with +sympathy. "Hold up, old boy," he said; "great man or not, we'll put a +bullet in him, damn him. As for women, they're all so." + +"You don't know how fond I was of that one," Rawdon said, +half-inarticulately. "Damme, I followed her like a footman. I gave up +everything I had to her. I'm a beggar because I would marry her. By +Jove, sir, I've pawned my own watch in order to get her anything she +fancied; and she--she's been making a purse for herself all the time, +and grudged me a hundred pound to get me out of quod." He then fiercely +and incoherently, and with an agitation under which his counsellor had +never before seen him labour, told Macmurdo the circumstances of the +story. His adviser caught at some stray hints in it. "She may be +innocent, after all," he said. "She says so. Steyne has been a hundred +times alone with her in the house before." + +"It may be so," Rawdon answered sadly, "but this don't look very +innocent": and he showed the Captain the thousand-pound note which he +had found in Becky's pocket-book. "This is what he gave her, Mac, and +she kep it unknown to me; and with this money in the house, she refused +to stand by me when I was locked up." The Captain could not but own +that the secreting of the money had a very ugly look. + +Whilst they were engaged in their conference, Rawdon dispatched Captain +Macmurdo's servant to Curzon Street, with an order to the domestic +there to give up a bag of clothes of which the Colonel had great need. +And during the man's absence, and with great labour and a Johnson's +Dictionary, which stood them in much stead, Rawdon and his second +composed a letter, which the latter was to send to Lord Steyne. +Captain Macmurdo had the honour of waiting upon the Marquis of Steyne, +on the part of Colonel Rawdon Crawley, and begged to intimate that he +was empowered by the Colonel to make any arrangements for the meeting +which, he had no doubt, it was his Lordship's intention to demand, and +which the circumstances of the morning had rendered inevitable. +Captain Macmurdo begged Lord Steyne, in the most polite manner, to +appoint a friend, with whom he (Captain M.M.) might communicate, and +desired that the meeting might take place with as little delay as +possible. + +In a postscript the Captain stated that he had in his possession a +bank-note for a large amount, which Colonel Crawley had reason to +suppose was the property of the Marquis of Steyne. And he was anxious, +on the Colonel's behalf, to give up the note to its owner. + +By the time this note was composed, the Captain's servant returned from +his mission to Colonel Crawley's house in Curzon Street, but without +the carpet-bag and portmanteau, for which he had been sent, and with a +very puzzled and odd face. + +"They won't give 'em up," said the man; "there's a regular shinty in +the house, and everything at sixes and sevens. The landlord's come in +and took possession. The servants was a drinkin' up in the +drawingroom. They said--they said you had gone off with the plate, +Colonel"--the man added after a pause--"One of the servants is off +already. And Simpson, the man as was very noisy and drunk indeed, says +nothing shall go out of the house until his wages is paid up." + +The account of this little revolution in May Fair astonished and gave a +little gaiety to an otherwise very triste conversation. The two +officers laughed at Rawdon's discomfiture. + +"I'm glad the little 'un isn't at home," Rawdon said, biting his nails. +"You remember him, Mac, don't you, in the Riding School? How he sat the +kicker to be sure! didn't he?" + +"That he did, old boy," said the good-natured Captain. + +Little Rawdon was then sitting, one of fifty gown boys, in the Chapel +of Whitefriars School, thinking, not about the sermon, but about going +home next Saturday, when his father would certainly tip him and perhaps +would take him to the play. + +"He's a regular trump, that boy," the father went on, still musing +about his son. "I say, Mac, if anything goes wrong--if I drop--I +should like you to--to go and see him, you know, and say that I was +very fond of him, and that. And--dash it--old chap, give him these +gold sleeve-buttons: it's all I've got." He covered his face with his +black hands, over which the tears rolled and made furrows of white. +Mr. Macmurdo had also occasion to take off his silk night-cap and rub +it across his eyes. + +"Go down and order some breakfast," he said to his man in a loud +cheerful voice. "What'll you have, Crawley? Some devilled kidneys and +a herring--let's say. And, Clay, lay out some dressing things for the +Colonel: we were always pretty much of a size, Rawdon, my boy, and +neither of us ride so light as we did when we first entered the corps." +With which, and leaving the Colonel to dress himself, Macmurdo turned +round towards the wall, and resumed the perusal of Bell's Life, until +such time as his friend's toilette was complete and he was at liberty +to commence his own. + +This, as he was about to meet a lord, Captain Macmurdo performed with +particular care. He waxed his mustachios into a state of brilliant +polish and put on a tight cravat and a trim buff waistcoat, so that all +the young officers in the mess-room, whither Crawley had preceded his +friend, complimented Mac on his appearance at breakfast and asked if he +was going to be married that Sunday. + + + +CHAPTER LV + +In Which the Same Subject is Pursued + +Becky did not rally from the state of stupor and confusion in which the +events of the previous night had plunged her intrepid spirit until the +bells of the Curzon Street Chapels were ringing for afternoon service, +and rising from her bed she began to ply her own bell, in order to +summon the French maid who had left her some hours before. + +Mrs. Rawdon Crawley rang many times in vain; and though, on the last +occasion, she rang with such vehemence as to pull down the bell-rope, +Mademoiselle Fifine did not make her appearance--no, not though her +mistress, in a great pet, and with the bell-rope in her hand, came out +to the landing-place with her hair over her shoulders and screamed out +repeatedly for her attendant. + +The truth is, she had quitted the premises for many hours, and upon +that permission which is called French leave among us. After picking up +the trinkets in the drawing-room, Mademoiselle had ascended to her own +apartments, packed and corded her own boxes there, tripped out and +called a cab for herself, brought down her trunks with her own hand, +and without ever so much as asking the aid of any of the other +servants, who would probably have refused it, as they hated her +cordially, and without wishing any one of them good-bye, had made her +exit from Curzon Street. + +The game, in her opinion, was over in that little domestic +establishment. Fifine went off in a cab, as we have known more exalted +persons of her nation to do under similar circumstances: but, more +provident or lucky than these, she secured not only her own property, +but some of her mistress's (if indeed that lady could be said to have +any property at all)--and not only carried off the trinkets before +alluded to, and some favourite dresses on which she had long kept her +eye, but four richly gilt Louis Quatorze candlesticks, six gilt albums, +keepsakes, and Books of Beauty, a gold enamelled snuff-box which had +once belonged to Madame du Barri, and the sweetest little inkstand and +mother-of-pearl blotting book, which Becky used when she composed her +charming little pink notes, had vanished from the premises in Curzon +Street together with Mademoiselle Fifine, and all the silver laid on +the table for the little festin which Rawdon interrupted. The plated +ware Mademoiselle left behind her was too cumbrous, probably for which +reason, no doubt, she also left the fire irons, the chimney-glasses, +and the rosewood cottage piano. + +A lady very like her subsequently kept a milliner's shop in the Rue du +Helder at Paris, where she lived with great credit and enjoyed the +patronage of my Lord Steyne. This person always spoke of England as of +the most treacherous country in the world, and stated to her young +pupils that she had been affreusement vole by natives of that island. +It was no doubt compassion for her misfortunes which induced the +Marquis of Steyne to be so very kind to Madame de Saint-Amaranthe. May +she flourish as she deserves--she appears no more in our quarter of +Vanity Fair. + +Hearing a buzz and a stir below, and indignant at the impudence of +those servants who would not answer her summons, Mrs. Crawley flung her +morning robe round her and descended majestically to the drawing-room, +whence the noise proceeded. + +The cook was there with blackened face, seated on the beautiful chintz +sofa by the side of Mrs. Raggles, to whom she was administering +Maraschino. The page with the sugar-loaf buttons, who carried about +Becky's pink notes, and jumped about her little carriage with such +alacrity, was now engaged putting his fingers into a cream dish; the +footman was talking to Raggles, who had a face full of perplexity and +woe--and yet, though the door was open, and Becky had been screaming a +half-dozen of times a few feet off, not one of her attendants had +obeyed her call. "Have a little drop, do'ee now, Mrs. Raggles," the +cook was saying as Becky entered, the white cashmere dressing-gown +flouncing around her. + +"Simpson! Trotter!" the mistress of the house cried in great wrath. +"How dare you stay here when you heard me call? How dare you sit down +in my presence? Where's my maid?" The page withdrew his fingers from +his mouth with a momentary terror, but the cook took off a glass of +Maraschino, of which Mrs. Raggles had had enough, staring at Becky over +the little gilt glass as she drained its contents. The liquor appeared +to give the odious rebel courage. + +"YOUR sofy, indeed!" Mrs. Cook said. "I'm a settin' on Mrs. Raggles's +sofy. Don't you stir, Mrs. Raggles, Mum. I'm a settin' on Mr. and Mrs. +Raggles's sofy, which they bought with honest money, and very dear it +cost 'em, too. And I'm thinkin' if I set here until I'm paid my wages, +I shall set a precious long time, Mrs. Raggles; and set I will, +too--ha! ha!" and with this she filled herself another glass of the +liquor and drank it with a more hideously satirical air. + +"Trotter! Simpson! turn that drunken wretch out," screamed Mrs. +Crawley. + +"I shawn't," said Trotter the footman; "turn out yourself. Pay our +selleries, and turn me out too. WE'LL go fast enough." + +"Are you all here to insult me?" cried Becky in a fury; "when Colonel +Crawley comes home I'll--" + +At this the servants burst into a horse haw-haw, in which, however, +Raggles, who still kept a most melancholy countenance, did not join. +"He ain't a coming back," Mr. Trotter resumed. "He sent for his +things, and I wouldn't let 'em go, although Mr. Raggles would; and I +don't b'lieve he's no more a Colonel than I am. He's hoff, and I +suppose you're a goin' after him. You're no better than swindlers, +both on you. Don't be a bullyin' ME. I won't stand it. Pay us our +selleries, I say. Pay us our selleries." It was evident, from Mr. +Trotter's flushed countenance and defective intonation, that he, too, +had had recourse to vinous stimulus. + +"Mr. Raggles," said Becky in a passion of vexation, "you will not +surely let me be insulted by that drunken man?" "Hold your noise, +Trotter; do now," said Simpson the page. He was affected by his +mistress's deplorable situation, and succeeded in preventing an +outrageous denial of the epithet "drunken" on the footman's part. + +"Oh, M'am," said Raggles, "I never thought to live to see this year +day: I've known the Crawley family ever since I was born. I lived +butler with Miss Crawley for thirty years; and I little thought one of +that family was a goin' to ruing me--yes, ruing me"--said the poor +fellow with tears in his eyes. "Har you a goin' to pay me? You've +lived in this 'ouse four year. You've 'ad my substance: my plate and +linning. You ho me a milk and butter bill of two 'undred pound, you +must 'ave noo laid heggs for your homlets, and cream for your spanil +dog." + +"She didn't care what her own flesh and blood had," interposed the +cook. "Many's the time, he'd have starved but for me." + +"He's a charaty-boy now, Cooky," said Mr. Trotter, with a drunken "ha! +ha!"--and honest Raggles continued, in a lamentable tone, an +enumeration of his griefs. All he said was true. Becky and her +husband had ruined him. He had bills coming due next week and no means +to meet them. He would be sold up and turned out of his shop and his +house, because he had trusted to the Crawley family. His tears and +lamentations made Becky more peevish than ever. + +"You all seem to be against me," she said bitterly. "What do you want? +I can't pay you on Sunday. Come back to-morrow and I'll pay you +everything. I thought Colonel Crawley had settled with you. He will +to-morrow. I declare to you upon my honour that he left home this +morning with fifteen hundred pounds in his pocket-book. He has left me +nothing. Apply to him. Give me a bonnet and shawl and let me go out +and find him. There was a difference between us this morning. You all +seem to know it. I promise you upon my word that you shall all be +paid. He has got a good appointment. Let me go out and find him." + +This audacious statement caused Raggles and the other personages +present to look at one another with a wild surprise, and with it +Rebecca left them. She went upstairs and dressed herself this time +without the aid of her French maid. She went into Rawdon's room, and +there saw that a trunk and bag were packed ready for removal, with a +pencil direction that they should be given when called for; then she +went into the Frenchwoman's garret; everything was clean, and all the +drawers emptied there. She bethought herself of the trinkets which had +been left on the ground and felt certain that the woman had fled. "Good +Heavens! was ever such ill luck as mine?" she said; "to be so near, +and to lose all. Is it all too late?" No; there was one chance more. + +She dressed herself and went away unmolested this time, but alone. It +was four o'clock. She went swiftly down the streets (she had no money +to pay for a carriage), and never stopped until she came to Sir Pitt +Crawley's door, in Great Gaunt Street. Where was Lady Jane Crawley? +She was at church. Becky was not sorry. Sir Pitt was in his study, and +had given orders not to be disturbed--she must see him--she slipped by +the sentinel in livery at once, and was in Sir Pitt's room before the +astonished Baronet had even laid down the paper. + +He turned red and started back from her with a look of great alarm and +horror. + +"Do not look so," she said. "I am not guilty, Pitt, dear Pitt; you +were my friend once. Before God, I am not guilty. I seem so. +Everything is against me. And oh! at such a moment! just when all my +hopes were about to be realized: just when happiness was in store for +us." + +"Is this true, what I see in the paper then?" Sir Pitt said--a +paragraph in which had greatly surprised him. + +"It is true. Lord Steyne told me on Friday night, the night of that +fatal ball. He has been promised an appointment any time these six +months. Mr. Martyr, the Colonial Secretary, told him yesterday that it +was made out. That unlucky arrest ensued; that horrible meeting. I was +only guilty of too much devotedness to Rawdon's service. I have +received Lord Steyne alone a hundred times before. I confess I had +money of which Rawdon knew nothing. Don't you know how careless he is +of it, and could I dare to confide it to him?" And so she went on with +a perfectly connected story, which she poured into the ears of her +perplexed kinsman. + +It was to the following effect. Becky owned, and with perfect +frankness, but deep contrition, that having remarked Lord Steyne's +partiality for her (at the mention of which Pitt blushed), and being +secure of her own virtue, she had determined to turn the great peer's +attachment to the advantage of herself and her family. "I looked for a +peerage for you, Pitt," she said (the brother-in-law again turned red). +"We have talked about it. Your genius and Lord Steyne's interest made +it more than probable, had not this dreadful calamity come to put an +end to all our hopes. But, first, I own that it was my object to +rescue my dear husband--him whom I love in spite of all his ill usage +and suspicions of me--to remove him from the poverty and ruin which was +impending over us. I saw Lord Steyne's partiality for me," she said, +casting down her eyes. "I own that I did everything in my power to +make myself pleasing to him, and as far as an honest woman may, to +secure his--his esteem. It was only on Friday morning that the news +arrived of the death of the Governor of Coventry Island, and my Lord +instantly secured the appointment for my dear husband. It was intended +as a surprise for him--he was to see it in the papers to-day. Even +after that horrid arrest took place (the expenses of which Lord Steyne +generously said he would settle, so that I was in a manner prevented +from coming to my husband's assistance), my Lord was laughing with me, +and saying that my dearest Rawdon would be consoled when he read of his +appointment in the paper, in that shocking spun--bailiff's house. And +then--then he came home. His suspicions were excited,--the dreadful +scene took place between my Lord and my cruel, cruel Rawdon--and, O my +God, what will happen next? Pitt, dear Pitt! pity me, and reconcile +us!" And as she spoke she flung herself down on her knees, and bursting +into tears, seized hold of Pitt's hand, which she kissed passionately. + +It was in this very attitude that Lady Jane, who, returning from +church, ran to her husband's room directly she heard Mrs. Rawdon +Crawley was closeted there, found the Baronet and his sister-in-law. + +"I am surprised that woman has the audacity to enter this house," Lady +Jane said, trembling in every limb and turning quite pale. (Her +Ladyship had sent out her maid directly after breakfast, who had +communicated with Raggles and Rawdon Crawley's household, who had told +her all, and a great deal more than they knew, of that story, and many +others besides). "How dare Mrs. Crawley to enter the house of--of an +honest family?" + +Sir Pitt started back, amazed at his wife's display of vigour. Becky +still kept her kneeling posture and clung to Sir Pitt's hand. + +"Tell her that she does not know all: Tell her that I am innocent, +dear Pitt," she whimpered out. + +"Upon my word, my love, I think you do Mrs. Crawley injustice," Sir +Pitt said; at which speech Rebecca was vastly relieved. "Indeed I +believe her to be--" + +"To be what?" cried out Lady Jane, her clear voice thrilling and, her +heart beating violently as she spoke. "To be a wicked woman--a +heartless mother, a false wife? She never loved her dear little boy, +who used to fly here and tell me of her cruelty to him. She never came +into a family but she strove to bring misery with her and to weaken the +most sacred affections with her wicked flattery and falsehoods. She +has deceived her husband, as she has deceived everybody; her soul is +black with vanity, worldliness, and all sorts of crime. I tremble when +I touch her. I keep my children out of her sight." + +"Lady Jane!" cried Sir Pitt, starting up, "this is really language--" +"I have been a true and faithful wife to you, Sir Pitt," Lady Jane +continued, intrepidly; "I have kept my marriage vow as I made it to God +and have been obedient and gentle as a wife should. But righteous +obedience has its limits, and I declare that I will not bear that--that +woman again under my roof; if she enters it, I and my children will +leave it. She is not worthy to sit down with Christian people. +You--you must choose, sir, between her and me"; and with this my Lady +swept out of the room, fluttering with her own audacity, and leaving +Rebecca and Sir Pitt not a little astonished at it. + +As for Becky, she was not hurt; nay, she was pleased. "It was the +diamond-clasp you gave me," she said to Sir Pitt, reaching him out her +hand; and before she left him (for which event you may be sure my Lady +Jane was looking out from her dressing-room window in the upper story) +the Baronet had promised to go and seek out his brother, and endeavour +to bring about a reconciliation. + +Rawdon found some of the young fellows of the regiment seated in the +mess-room at breakfast, and was induced without much difficulty to +partake of that meal, and of the devilled legs of fowls and soda-water +with which these young gentlemen fortified themselves. Then they had a +conversation befitting the day and their time of life: about the next +pigeon-match at Battersea, with relative bets upon Ross and +Osbaldiston; about Mademoiselle Ariane of the French Opera, and who had +left her, and how she was consoled by Panther Carr; and about the fight +between the Butcher and the Pet, and the probabilities that it was a +cross. Young Tandyman, a hero of seventeen, laboriously endeavouring +to get up a pair of mustachios, had seen the fight, and spoke in the +most scientific manner about the battle and the condition of the men. +It was he who had driven the Butcher on to the ground in his drag and +passed the whole of the previous night with him. Had there not been +foul play he must have won it. All the old files of the Ring were in +it; and Tandyman wouldn't pay; no, dammy, he wouldn't pay. It was but +a year since the young Cornet, now so knowing a hand in Cribb's +parlour, had a still lingering liking for toffy, and used to be birched +at Eton. + +So they went on talking about dancers, fights, drinking, demireps, +until Macmurdo came down and joined the boys and the conversation. He +did not appear to think that any especial reverence was due to their +boyhood; the old fellow cut in with stories, to the full as choice as +any the youngest rake present had to tell--nor did his own grey hairs +nor their smooth faces detain him. Old Mac was famous for his good +stories. He was not exactly a lady's man; that is, men asked him to +dine rather at the houses of their mistresses than of their mothers. +There can scarcely be a life lower, perhaps, than his, but he was quite +contented with it, such as it was, and led it in perfect good nature, +simplicity, and modesty of demeanour. + +By the time Mac had finished a copious breakfast, most of the others +had concluded their meal. Young Lord Varinas was smoking an immense +Meerschaum pipe, while Captain Hugues was employed with a cigar: that +violent little devil Tandyman, with his little bull-terrier between his +legs, was tossing for shillings with all his might (that fellow was +always at some game or other) against Captain Deuceace; and Mac and +Rawdon walked off to the Club, neither, of course, having given any +hint of the business which was occupying their minds. Both, on the +other hand, had joined pretty gaily in the conversation, for why should +they interrupt it? Feasting, drinking, ribaldry, laughter, go on +alongside of all sorts of other occupations in Vanity Fair--the crowds +were pouring out of church as Rawdon and his friend passed down St. +James's Street and entered into their Club. + +The old bucks and habitues, who ordinarily stand gaping and grinning +out of the great front window of the Club, had not arrived at their +posts as yet--the newspaper-room was almost empty. One man was present +whom Rawdon did not know; another to whom he owed a little score for +whist, and whom, in consequence, he did not care to meet; a third was +reading the Royalist (a periodical famous for its scandal and its +attachment to Church and King) Sunday paper at the table, and looking +up at Crawley with some interest, said, "Crawley, I congratulate you." + +"What do you mean?" said the Colonel. + +"It's in the Observer and the Royalist too," said Mr. Smith. + +"What?" Rawdon cried, turning very red. He thought that the affair +with Lord Steyne was already in the public prints. Smith looked up +wondering and smiling at the agitation which the Colonel exhibited as +he took up the paper and, trembling, began to read. + +Mr. Smith and Mr. Brown (the gentleman with whom Rawdon had the +outstanding whist account) had been talking about the Colonel just +before he came in. + +"It is come just in the nick of time," said Smith. "I suppose Crawley +had not a shilling in the world." + +"It's a wind that blows everybody good," Mr. Brown said. "He can't go +away without paying me a pony he owes me." + +"What's the salary?" asked Smith. + +"Two or three thousand," answered the other. "But the climate's so +infernal, they don't enjoy it long. Liverseege died after eighteen +months of it, and the man before went off in six weeks, I hear." + +"Some people say his brother is a very clever man. I always found him +a d------ bore," Smith ejaculated. "He must have good interest, though. +He must have got the Colonel the place." + +"He!" said Brown, with a sneer. "Pooh. It was Lord Steyne got it." + +"How do you mean?" + +"A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband," answered the other +enigmatically, and went to read his papers. + +Rawdon, for his part, read in the Royalist the following astonishing +paragraph: + +GOVERNORSHIP OF COVENTRY ISLAND.--H.M.S. Yellowjack, Commander +Jaunders, has brought letters and papers from Coventry Island. H. E. +Sir Thomas Liverseege had fallen a victim to the prevailing fever at +Swampton. His loss is deeply felt in the flourishing colony. We hear +that the Governorship has been offered to Colonel Rawdon Crawley, C.B., +a distinguished Waterloo officer. We need not only men of acknowledged +bravery, but men of administrative talents to superintend the affairs +of our colonies, and we have no doubt that the gentleman selected by +the Colonial Office to fill the lamented vacancy which has occurred at +Coventry Island is admirably calculated for the post which he is about +to occupy. + + +"Coventry Island! Where was it? Who had appointed him to the +government? You must take me out as your secretary, old boy," Captain +Macmurdo said laughing; and as Crawley and his friend sat wondering and +perplexed over the announcement, the Club waiter brought in to the +Colonel a card on which the name of Mr. Wenham was engraved, who begged +to see Colonel Crawley. + +The Colonel and his aide-de-camp went out to meet the gentleman, +rightly conjecturing that he was an emissary of Lord Steyne. "How d'ye +do, Crawley? I am glad to see you," said Mr. Wenham with a bland smile, +and grasping Crawley's hand with great cordiality. + +"You come, I suppose, from--" + +"Exactly," said Mr. Wenham. + +"Then this is my friend Captain Macmurdo, of the Life Guards Green." + +"Delighted to know Captain Macmurdo, I'm sure," Mr. Wenham said and +tendered another smile and shake of the hand to the second, as he had +done to the principal. Mac put out one finger, armed with a buckskin +glove, and made a very frigid bow to Mr. Wenham over his tight cravat. +He was, perhaps, discontented at being put in communication with a +pekin, and thought that Lord Steyne should have sent him a Colonel at +the very least. + +"As Macmurdo acts for me, and knows what I mean," Crawley said, "I had +better retire and leave you together." + +"Of course," said Macmurdo. + +"By no means, my dear Colonel," Mr. Wenham said; "the interview which I +had the honour of requesting was with you personally, though the +company of Captain Macmurdo cannot fail to be also most pleasing. In +fact, Captain, I hope that our conversation will lead to none but the +most agreeable results, very different from those which my friend +Colonel Crawley appears to anticipate." + +"Humph!" said Captain Macmurdo. Be hanged to these civilians, he +thought to himself, they are always for arranging and speechifying. Mr. +Wenham took a chair which was not offered to him--took a paper from his +pocket, and resumed-- + +"You have seen this gratifying announcement in the papers this morning, +Colonel? Government has secured a most valuable servant, and you, if +you accept office, as I presume you will, an excellent appointment. +Three thousand a year, delightful climate, excellent government-house, +all your own way in the Colony, and a certain promotion. I +congratulate you with all my heart. I presume you know, gentlemen, to +whom my friend is indebted for this piece of patronage?" + +"Hanged if I know," the Captain said; his principal turned very red. + +"To one of the most generous and kindest men in the world, as he is one +of the greatest--to my excellent friend, the Marquis of Steyne." + +"I'll see him d---- before I take his place," growled out Rawdon. + +"You are irritated against my noble friend," Mr. Wenham calmly resumed; +"and now, in the name of common sense and justice, tell me why?" + +"WHY?" cried Rawdon in surprise. + +"Why? Dammy!" said the Captain, ringing his stick on the ground. + +"Dammy, indeed," said Mr. Wenham with the most agreeable smile; "still, +look at the matter as a man of the world--as an honest man--and see if +you have not been in the wrong. You come home from a journey, and +find--what?--my Lord Steyne supping at your house in Curzon Street with +Mrs. Crawley. Is the circumstance strange or novel? Has he not been a +hundred times before in the same position? Upon my honour and word as a +gentleman"--Mr. Wenham here put his hand on his waistcoat with a +parliamentary air--"I declare I think that your suspicions are +monstrous and utterly unfounded, and that they injure an honourable +gentleman who has proved his good-will towards you by a thousand +benefactions--and a most spotless and innocent lady." + +"You don't mean to say that--that Crawley's mistaken?" said Mr. +Macmurdo. + +"I believe that Mrs. Crawley is as innocent as my wife, Mrs. Wenham," +Mr. Wenham said with great energy. "I believe that, misled by an +infernal jealousy, my friend here strikes a blow against not only an +infirm and old man of high station, his constant friend and benefactor, +but against his wife, his own dearest honour, his son's future +reputation, and his own prospects in life." + +"I will tell you what happened," Mr. Wenham continued with great +solemnity; "I was sent for this morning by my Lord Steyne, and found +him in a pitiable state, as, I need hardly inform Colonel Crawley, any +man of age and infirmity would be after a personal conflict with a man +of your strength. I say to your face; it was a cruel advantage you +took of that strength, Colonel Crawley. It was not only the body of my +noble and excellent friend which was wounded--his heart, sir, was +bleeding. A man whom he had loaded with benefits and regarded with +affection had subjected him to the foulest indignity. What was this +very appointment, which appears in the journals of to-day, but a proof +of his kindness to you? When I saw his Lordship this morning I found +him in a state pitiable indeed to see, and as anxious as you are to +revenge the outrage committed upon him, by blood. You know he has +given his proofs, I presume, Colonel Crawley?" + +"He has plenty of pluck," said the Colonel. "Nobody ever said he +hadn't." + +"His first order to me was to write a letter of challenge, and to carry +it to Colonel Crawley. One or other of us," he said, "must not survive +the outrage of last night." + +Crawley nodded. "You're coming to the point, Wenham," he said. + +"I tried my utmost to calm Lord Steyne. 'Good God! sir,' I said, 'how I +regret that Mrs. Wenham and myself had not accepted Mrs. Crawley's +invitation to sup with her!'" + +"She asked you to sup with her?" Captain Macmurdo said. + +"After the opera. Here's the note of invitation--stop--no, this is +another paper--I thought I had it, but it's of no consequence, and I +pledge you my word to the fact. If we had come--and it was only one of +Mrs. Wenham's headaches which prevented us--she suffers under them a +good deal, especially in the spring--if we had come, and you had +returned home, there would have been no quarrel, no insult, no +suspicion--and so it is positively because my poor wife has a headache +that you are to bring death down upon two men of honour and plunge two +of the most excellent and ancient families in the kingdom into disgrace +and sorrow." + +Mr. Macmurdo looked at his principal with the air of a man profoundly +puzzled, and Rawdon felt with a kind of rage that his prey was escaping +him. He did not believe a word of the story, and yet, how discredit or +disprove it? + +Mr. Wenham continued with the same fluent oratory, which in his place +in Parliament he had so often practised--"I sat for an hour or more by +Lord Steyne's bedside, beseeching, imploring Lord Steyne to forego his +intention of demanding a meeting. I pointed out to him that the +circumstances were after all suspicious--they were suspicious. I +acknowledge it--any man in your position might have been taken in--I +said that a man furious with jealousy is to all intents and purposes a +madman, and should be as such regarded--that a duel between you must +lead to the disgrace of all parties concerned--that a man of his +Lordship's exalted station had no right in these days, when the most +atrocious revolutionary principles, and the most dangerous levelling +doctrines are preached among the vulgar, to create a public scandal; +and that, however innocent, the common people would insist that he was +guilty. In fine, I implored him not to send the challenge." + +"I don't believe one word of the whole story," said Rawdon, grinding +his teeth. "I believe it a d------ lie, and that you're in it, Mr. +Wenham. If the challenge don't come from him, by Jove it shall come +from me." + +Mr. Wenham turned deadly pale at this savage interruption of the +Colonel and looked towards the door. + +But he found a champion in Captain Macmurdo. That gentleman rose up +with an oath and rebuked Rawdon for his language. "You put the affair +into my hands, and you shall act as I think fit, by Jove, and not as +you do. You have no right to insult Mr. Wenham with this sort of +language; and dammy, Mr. Wenham, you deserve an apology. And as for a +challenge to Lord Steyne, you may get somebody else to carry it, I +won't. If my lord, after being thrashed, chooses to sit still, dammy +let him. And as for the affair with--with Mrs. Crawley, my belief is, +there's nothing proved at all: that your wife's innocent, as innocent +as Mr. Wenham says she is; and at any rate that you would be a d--fool +not to take the place and hold your tongue." + +"Captain Macmurdo, you speak like a man of sense," Mr. Wenham cried +out, immensely relieved--"I forget any words that Colonel Crawley has +used in the irritation of the moment." + +"I thought you would," Rawdon said with a sneer. + +"Shut your mouth, you old stoopid," the Captain said good-naturedly. +"Mr. Wenham ain't a fighting man; and quite right, too." + +"This matter, in my belief," the Steyne emissary cried, "ought to be +buried in the most profound oblivion. A word concerning it should +never pass these doors. I speak in the interest of my friend, as well +as of Colonel Crawley, who persists in considering me his enemy." + +"I suppose Lord Steyne won't talk about it very much," said Captain +Macmurdo; "and I don't see why our side should. The affair ain't a +very pretty one, any way you take it, and the less said about it the +better. It's you are thrashed, and not us; and if you are satisfied, +why, I think, we should be." + +Mr. Wenham took his hat, upon this, and Captain Macmurdo following him +to the door, shut it upon himself and Lord Steyne's agent, leaving +Rawdon chafing within. When the two were on the other side, Macmurdo +looked hard at the other ambassador and with an expression of anything +but respect on his round jolly face. + +"You don't stick at a trifle, Mr. Wenham," he said. + +"You flatter me, Captain Macmurdo," answered the other with a smile. +"Upon my honour and conscience now, Mrs. Crawley did ask us to sup +after the opera." + +"Of course; and Mrs. Wenham had one of her head-aches. I say, I've got +a thousand-pound note here, which I will give you if you will give me a +receipt, please; and I will put the note up in an envelope for Lord +Steyne. My man shan't fight him. But we had rather not take his money." + +"It was all a mistake--all a mistake, my dear sir," the other said with +the utmost innocence of manner; and was bowed down the Club steps by +Captain Macmurdo, just as Sir Pitt Crawley ascended them. There was a +slight acquaintance between these two gentlemen, and the Captain, going +back with the Baronet to the room where the latter's brother was, told +Sir Pitt, in confidence, that he had made the affair all right between +Lord Steyne and the Colonel. + +Sir Pitt was well pleased, of course, at this intelligence, and +congratulated his brother warmly upon the peaceful issue of the affair, +making appropriate moral remarks upon the evils of duelling and the +unsatisfactory nature of that sort of settlement of disputes. + +And after this preface, he tried with all his eloquence to effect a +reconciliation between Rawdon and his wife. He recapitulated the +statements which Becky had made, pointed out the probabilities of their +truth, and asserted his own firm belief in her innocence. + +But Rawdon would not hear of it. "She has kep money concealed from me +these ten years," he said "She swore, last night only, she had none +from Steyne. She knew it was all up, directly I found it. If she's +not guilty, Pitt, she's as bad as guilty, and I'll never see her +again--never." His head sank down on his chest as he spoke the words, +and he looked quite broken and sad. + +"Poor old boy," Macmurdo said, shaking his head. + +Rawdon Crawley resisted for some time the idea of taking the place +which had been procured for him by so odious a patron, and was also for +removing the boy from the school where Lord Steyne's interest had +placed him. He was induced, however, to acquiesce in these benefits by +the entreaties of his brother and Macmurdo, but mainly by the latter, +pointing out to him what a fury Steyne would be in to think that his +enemy's fortune was made through his means. + +When the Marquis of Steyne came abroad after his accident, the Colonial +Secretary bowed up to him and congratulated himself and the Service +upon having made so excellent an appointment. These congratulations +were received with a degree of gratitude which may be imagined on the +part of Lord Steyne. + +The secret of the rencontre between him and Colonel Crawley was buried +in the profoundest oblivion, as Wenham said; that is, by the seconds +and the principals. But before that evening was over it was talked of +at fifty dinner-tables in Vanity Fair. Little Cackleby himself went to +seven evening parties and told the story with comments and emendations +at each place. How Mrs. Washington White revelled in it! The +Bishopess of Ealing was shocked beyond expression; the Bishop went and +wrote his name down in the visiting-book at Gaunt House that very day. +Little Southdown was sorry; so you may be sure was his sister Lady +Jane, very sorry. Lady Southdown wrote it off to her other daughter at +the Cape of Good Hope. It was town-talk for at least three days, and +was only kept out of the newspapers by the exertions of Mr. Wagg, +acting upon a hint from Mr. Wenham. + +The bailiffs and brokers seized upon poor Raggles in Curzon Street, and +the late fair tenant of that poor little mansion was in the +meanwhile--where? Who cared! Who asked after a day or two? Was she +guilty or not? We all know how charitable the world is, and how the +verdict of Vanity Fair goes when there is a doubt. Some people said +she had gone to Naples in pursuit of Lord Steyne, whilst others averred +that his Lordship quitted that city and fled to Palermo on hearing of +Becky's arrival; some said she was living in Bierstadt, and had become +a dame d'honneur to the Queen of Bulgaria; some that she was at +Boulogne; and others, at a boarding-house at Cheltenham. + +Rawdon made her a tolerable annuity, and we may be sure that she was a +woman who could make a little money go a great way, as the saying is. +He would have paid his debts on leaving England, could he have got any +Insurance Office to take his life, but the climate of Coventry Island +was so bad that he could borrow no money on the strength of his salary. +He remitted, however, to his brother punctually, and wrote to his +little boy regularly every mail. He kept Macmurdo in cigars and sent +over quantities of shells, cayenne pepper, hot pickles, guava jelly, +and colonial produce to Lady Jane. He sent his brother home the Swamp +Town Gazette, in which the new Governor was praised with immense +enthusiasm; whereas the Swamp Town Sentinel, whose wife was not asked +to Government House, declared that his Excellency was a tyrant, +compared to whom Nero was an enlightened philanthropist. Little Rawdon +used to like to get the papers and read about his Excellency. + +His mother never made any movement to see the child. He went home to +his aunt for Sundays and holidays; he soon knew every bird's nest about +Queen's Crawley, and rode out with Sir Huddlestone's hounds, which he +admired so on his first well-remembered visit to Hampshire. + + + +CHAPTER LVI + +Georgy is Made a Gentleman + +Georgy Osborne was now fairly established in his grandfather's mansion +in Russell Square, occupant of his father's room in the house and heir +apparent of all the splendours there. The good looks, gallant bearing, +and gentlemanlike appearance of the boy won the grandsire's heart for +him. Mr. Osborne was as proud of him as ever he had been of the elder +George. + +The child had many more luxuries and indulgences than had been awarded +his father. Osborne's commerce had prospered greatly of late years. +His wealth and importance in the City had very much increased. He had +been glad enough in former days to put the elder George to a good +private school; and a commission in the army for his son had been a +source of no small pride to him; for little George and his future +prospects the old man looked much higher. He would make a gentleman of +the little chap, was Mr. Osborne's constant saying regarding little +Georgy. He saw him in his mind's eye, a collegian, a Parliament man, a +Baronet, perhaps. The old man thought he would die contented if he +could see his grandson in a fair way to such honours. He would have +none but a tip-top college man to educate him--none of your quacks and +pretenders--no, no. A few years before, he used to be savage, and +inveigh against all parsons, scholars, and the like declaring that they +were a pack of humbugs, and quacks that weren't fit to get their living +but by grinding Latin and Greek, and a set of supercilious dogs that +pretended to look down upon British merchants and gentlemen, who could +buy up half a hundred of 'em. He would mourn now, in a very solemn +manner, that his own education had been neglected, and repeatedly point +out, in pompous orations to Georgy, the necessity and excellence of +classical acquirements. + +When they met at dinner the grandsire used to ask the lad what he had +been reading during the day, and was greatly interested at the report +the boy gave of his own studies, pretending to understand little George +when he spoke regarding them. He made a hundred blunders and showed +his ignorance many a time. It did not increase the respect which the +child had for his senior. A quick brain and a better education +elsewhere showed the boy very soon that his grandsire was a dullard, +and he began accordingly to command him and to look down upon him; for +his previous education, humble and contracted as it had been, had made +a much better gentleman of Georgy than any plans of his grandfather +could make him. He had been brought up by a kind, weak, and tender +woman, who had no pride about anything but about him, and whose heart +was so pure and whose bearing was so meek and humble that she could not +but needs be a true lady. She busied herself in gentle offices and +quiet duties; if she never said brilliant things, she never spoke or +thought unkind ones; guileless and artless, loving and pure, indeed how +could our poor little Amelia be other than a real gentlewoman! + +Young Georgy lorded over this soft and yielding nature; and the +contrast of its simplicity and delicacy with the coarse pomposity of +the dull old man with whom he next came in contact made him lord over +the latter too. If he had been a Prince Royal he could not have been +better brought up to think well of himself. + +Whilst his mother was yearning after him at home, and I do believe +every hour of the day, and during most hours of the sad lonely nights, +thinking of him, this young gentleman had a number of pleasures and +consolations administered to him, which made him for his part bear the +separation from Amelia very easily. Little boys who cry when they are +going to school cry because they are going to a very uncomfortable +place. It is only a few who weep from sheer affection. When you think +that the eyes of your childhood dried at the sight of a piece of +gingerbread, and that a plum cake was a compensation for the agony of +parting with your mamma and sisters, oh my friend and brother, you need +not be too confident of your own fine feelings. + +Well, then, Master George Osborne had every comfort and luxury that a +wealthy and lavish old grandfather thought fit to provide. The +coachman was instructed to purchase for him the handsomest pony which +could be bought for money, and on this George was taught to ride, first +at a riding-school, whence, after having performed satisfactorily +without stirrups, and over the leaping-bar, he was conducted through +the New Road to Regent's Park, and then to Hyde Park, where he rode in +state with Martin the coachman behind him. Old Osborne, who took +matters more easily in the City now, where he left his affairs to his +junior partners, would often ride out with Miss O. in the same +fashionable direction. As little Georgy came cantering up with his +dandified air and his heels down, his grandfather would nudge the lad's +aunt and say, "Look, Miss O." And he would laugh, and his face would +grow red with pleasure, as he nodded out of the window to the boy, as +the groom saluted the carriage, and the footman saluted Master George. +Here too his aunt, Mrs. Frederick Bullock (whose chariot might daily be +seen in the Ring, with bullocks or emblazoned on the panels and +harness, and three pasty-faced little Bullocks, covered with cockades +and feathers, staring from the windows) Mrs. Frederick Bullock, I say, +flung glances of the bitterest hatred at the little upstart as he rode +by with his hand on his side and his hat on one ear, as proud as a lord. + +Though he was scarcely eleven years of age, Master George wore straps +and the most beautiful little boots like a man. He had gilt spurs, and +a gold-headed whip, and a fine pin in his handkerchief, and the neatest +little kid gloves which Lamb's Conduit Street could furnish. His mother +had given him a couple of neckcloths, and carefully hemmed and made +some little shirts for him; but when her Eli came to see the widow, +they were replaced by much finer linen. He had little jewelled buttons +in the lawn shirt fronts. Her humble presents had been put aside--I +believe Miss Osborne had given them to the coachman's boy. Amelia +tried to think she was pleased at the change. Indeed, she was happy +and charmed to see the boy looking so beautiful. + +She had had a little black profile of him done for a shilling, and this +was hung up by the side of another portrait over her bed. One day the +boy came on his accustomed visit, galloping down the little street at +Brompton, and bringing, as usual, all the inhabitants to the windows to +admire his splendour, and with great eagerness and a look of triumph in +his face, he pulled a case out of his great-coat--it was a natty white +great-coat, with a cape and a velvet collar--pulled out a red morocco +case, which he gave her. + +"I bought it with my own money, Mamma," he said. "I thought you'd like +it." + +Amelia opened the case, and giving a little cry of delighted affection, +seized the boy and embraced him a hundred times. It was a miniature of +himself, very prettily done (though not half handsome enough, we may be +sure, the widow thought). His grandfather had wished to have a picture +of him by an artist whose works, exhibited in a shop-window, in +Southampton Row, had caught the old gentleman's eye; and George, who +had plenty of money, bethought him of asking the painter how much a +copy of the little portrait would cost, saying that he would pay for it +out of his own money and that he wanted to give it to his mother. The +pleased painter executed it for a small price, and old Osborne himself, +when he heard of the incident, growled out his satisfaction and gave +the boy twice as many sovereigns as he paid for the miniature. + +But what was the grandfather's pleasure compared to Amelia's ecstacy? +That proof of the boy's affection charmed her so that she thought no +child in the world was like hers for goodness. For long weeks after, +the thought of his love made her happy. She slept better with the +picture under her pillow, and how many many times did she kiss it and +weep and pray over it! A small kindness from those she loved made that +timid heart grateful. Since her parting with George she had had no +such joy and consolation. + +At his new home Master George ruled like a lord; at dinner he invited +the ladies to drink wine with the utmost coolness, and took off his +champagne in a way which charmed his old grandfather. "Look at him," +the old man would say, nudging his neighbour with a delighted purple +face, "did you ever see such a chap? Lord, Lord! he'll be ordering a +dressing-case next, and razors to shave with; I'm blessed if he won't." + +The antics of the lad did not, however, delight Mr. Osborne's friends +so much as they pleased the old gentleman. It gave Mr. Justice Coffin +no pleasure to hear Georgy cut into the conversation and spoil his +stories. Colonel Fogey was not interested in seeing the little boy half +tipsy. Mr. Sergeant Toffy's lady felt no particular gratitude, when, +with a twist of his elbow, he tilted a glass of port-wine over her +yellow satin and laughed at the disaster; nor was she better pleased, +although old Osborne was highly delighted, when Georgy "whopped" her +third boy (a young gentleman a year older than Georgy, and by chance +home for the holidays from Dr. Tickleus's at Ealing School) in Russell +Square. George's grandfather gave the boy a couple of sovereigns for +that feat and promised to reward him further for every boy above his +own size and age whom he whopped in a similar manner. It is difficult +to say what good the old man saw in these combats; he had a vague +notion that quarrelling made boys hardy, and that tyranny was a useful +accomplishment for them to learn. English youth have been so educated +time out of mind, and we have hundreds of thousands of apologists and +admirers of injustice, misery, and brutality, as perpetrated among +children. Flushed with praise and victory over Master Toffy, George +wished naturally to pursue his conquests further, and one day as he was +strutting about in prodigiously dandified new clothes, near St. +Pancras, and a young baker's boy made sarcastic comments upon his +appearance, the youthful patrician pulled off his dandy jacket with +great spirit, and giving it in charge to the friend who accompanied him +(Master Todd, of Great Coram Street, Russell Square, son of the junior +partner of the house of Osborne and Co.), George tried to whop the +little baker. But the chances of war were unfavourable this time, and +the little baker whopped Georgy, who came home with a rueful black eye +and all his fine shirt frill dabbled with the claret drawn from his own +little nose. He told his grandfather that he had been in combat with a +giant, and frightened his poor mother at Brompton with long, and by no +means authentic, accounts of the battle. + +This young Todd, of Coram Street, Russell Square, was Master George's +great friend and admirer. They both had a taste for painting +theatrical characters; for hardbake and raspberry tarts; for sliding +and skating in the Regent's Park and the Serpentine, when the weather +permitted; for going to the play, whither they were often conducted, by +Mr. Osborne's orders, by Rowson, Master George's appointed +body-servant, with whom they sat in great comfort in the pit. + +In the company of this gentleman they visited all the principal +theatres of the metropolis; knew the names of all the actors from Drury +Lane to Sadler's Wells; and performed, indeed, many of the plays to the +Todd family and their youthful friends, with West's famous characters, +on their pasteboard theatre. Rowson, the footman, who was of a +generous disposition, would not unfrequently, when in cash, treat his +young master to oysters after the play, and to a glass of rum-shrub for +a night-cap. We may be pretty certain that Mr. Rowson profited in his +turn by his young master's liberality and gratitude for the pleasures +to which the footman inducted him. + +A famous tailor from the West End of the town--Mr. Osborne would have +none of your City or Holborn bunglers, he said, for the boy (though a +City tailor was good enough for HIM)--was summoned to ornament little +George's person, and was told to spare no expense in so doing. So, Mr. +Woolsey, of Conduit Street, gave a loose to his imagination and sent +the child home fancy trousers, fancy waistcoats, and fancy jackets +enough to furnish a school of little dandies. Georgy had little white +waistcoats for evening parties, and little cut velvet waistcoats for +dinners, and a dear little darling shawl dressing-gown, for all the +world like a little man. He dressed for dinner every day, "like a +regular West End swell," as his grandfather remarked; one of the +domestics was affected to his special service, attended him at his +toilette, answered his bell, and brought him his letters always on a +silver tray. + +Georgy, after breakfast, would sit in the arm-chair in the dining-room +and read the Morning Post, just like a grown-up man. "How he DU dam +and swear," the servants would cry, delighted at his precocity. Those +who remembered the Captain his father, declared Master George was his +Pa, every inch of him. He made the house lively by his activity, his +imperiousness, his scolding, and his good-nature. + +George's education was confided to a neighbouring scholar and private +pedagogue who "prepared young noblemen and gentlemen for the +Universities, the senate, and the learned professions: whose system +did not embrace the degrading corporal severities still practised at +the ancient places of education, and in whose family the pupils would +find the elegances of refined society and the confidence and affection +of a home." It was in this way that the Reverend Lawrence Veal of Hart +Street, Bloomsbury, and domestic Chaplain to the Earl of Bareacres, +strove with Mrs. Veal his wife to entice pupils. + +By thus advertising and pushing sedulously, the domestic Chaplain and +his Lady generally succeeded in having one or two scholars by them--who +paid a high figure and were thought to be in uncommonly comfortable +quarters. There was a large West Indian, whom nobody came to see, with +a mahogany complexion, a woolly head, and an exceedingly dandyfied +appearance; there was another hulking boy of three-and-twenty whose +education had been neglected and whom Mr. and Mrs. Veal were to +introduce into the polite world; there were two sons of Colonel Bangles +of the East India Company's Service: these four sat down to dinner at +Mrs. Veal's genteel board, when Georgy was introduced to her +establishment. + +Georgy was, like some dozen other pupils, only a day boy; he arrived in +the morning under the guardianship of his friend Mr. Rowson, and if it +was fine, would ride away in the afternoon on his pony, followed by the +groom. The wealth of his grandfather was reported in the school to be +prodigious. The Rev. Mr. Veal used to compliment Georgy upon it +personally, warning him that he was destined for a high station; that +it became him to prepare, by sedulity and docility in youth, for the +lofty duties to which he would be called in mature age; that obedience +in the child was the best preparation for command in the man; and that +he therefore begged George would not bring toffee into the school and +ruin the health of the Masters Bangles, who had everything they wanted +at the elegant and abundant table of Mrs. Veal. + +With respect to learning, "the Curriculum," as Mr. Veal loved to call +it, was of prodigious extent, and the young gentlemen in Hart Street +might learn a something of every known science. The Rev. Mr. Veal had +an orrery, an electrifying machine, a turning lathe, a theatre (in the +wash-house), a chemical apparatus, and what he called a select library +of all the works of the best authors of ancient and modern times and +languages. He took the boys to the British Museum and descanted upon +the antiquities and the specimens of natural history there, so that +audiences would gather round him as he spoke, and all Bloomsbury highly +admired him as a prodigiously well-informed man. And whenever he spoke +(which he did almost always), he took care to produce the very finest +and longest words of which the vocabulary gave him the use, rightly +judging that it was as cheap to employ a handsome, large, and sonorous +epithet, as to use a little stingy one. + +Thus he would say to George in school, "I observed on my return home +from taking the indulgence of an evening's scientific conversation with +my excellent friend Doctor Bulders--a true archaeologian, gentlemen, a +true archaeologian--that the windows of your venerated grandfather's +almost princely mansion in Russell Square were illuminated as if for +the purposes of festivity. Am I right in my conjecture that Mr. +Osborne entertained a society of chosen spirits round his sumptuous +board last night?" + +Little Georgy, who had considerable humour, and used to mimic Mr. Veal +to his face with great spirit and dexterity, would reply that Mr. V. +was quite correct in his surmise. + +"Then those friends who had the honour of partaking of Mr. Osborne's +hospitality, gentlemen, had no reason, I will lay any wager, to +complain of their repast. I myself have been more than once so +favoured. (By the way, Master Osborne, you came a little late this +morning, and have been a defaulter in this respect more than once.) I +myself, I say, gentlemen, humble as I am, have been found not unworthy +to share Mr. Osborne's elegant hospitality. And though I have feasted +with the great and noble of the world--for I presume that I may call my +excellent friend and patron, the Right Honourable George Earl of +Bareacres, one of the number--yet I assure you that the board of the +British merchant was to the full as richly served, and his reception as +gratifying and noble. Mr. Bluck, sir, we will resume, if you please, +that passage of Eutropis, which was interrupted by the late arrival of +Master Osborne." + +To this great man George's education was for some time entrusted. +Amelia was bewildered by his phrases, but thought him a prodigy of +learning. That poor widow made friends of Mrs. Veal, for reasons of +her own. She liked to be in the house and see Georgy coming to school +there. She liked to be asked to Mrs. Veal's conversazioni, which took +place once a month (as you were informed on pink cards, with AOHNH +[_Transcriber's Note: The name of the Greek goddess Athene; the "O" +represents a capital theta._] engraved on them), and where the professor +welcomed his pupils and their friends to weak tea and scientific +conversation. Poor little Amelia never missed one of these +entertainments and thought them delicious so long as she might have +Georgy sitting by her. And she would walk from Brompton in any weather, +and embrace Mrs. Veal with tearful gratitude for the delightful evening +she had passed, when, the company having retired and Georgy gone off +with Mr. Rowson, his attendant, poor Mrs. Osborne put on her cloaks and +her shawls preparatory to walking home. + +As for the learning which Georgy imbibed under this valuable master of +a hundred sciences, to judge from the weekly reports which the lad took +home to his grandfather, his progress was remarkable. The names of a +score or more of desirable branches of knowledge were printed in a +table, and the pupil's progress in each was marked by the professor. +In Greek Georgy was pronounced aristos, in Latin optimus, in French +tres bien, and so forth; and everybody had prizes for everything at the +end of the year. Even Mr. Swartz, the wooly-headed young gentleman, +and half-brother to the Honourable Mrs. Mac Mull, and Mr. Bluck, the +neglected young pupil of three-and-twenty from the agricultural +district, and that idle young scapegrace of a Master Todd before +mentioned, received little eighteen-penny books, with "Athene" engraved +on them, and a pompous Latin inscription from the professor to his +young friends. + +The family of this Master Todd were hangers-on of the house of Osborne. +The old gentleman had advanced Todd from being a clerk to be a junior +partner in his establishment. + +Mr. Osborne was the godfather of young Master Todd (who in subsequent +life wrote Mr. Osborne Todd on his cards and became a man of decided +fashion), while Miss Osborne had accompanied Miss Maria Todd to the +font, and gave her protegee a prayer-book, a collection of tracts, a +volume of very low church poetry, or some such memento of her goodness +every year. Miss O. drove the Todds out in her carriage now and then; +when they were ill, her footman, in large plush smalls and waistcoat, +brought jellies and delicacies from Russell Square to Coram Street. +Coram Street trembled and looked up to Russell Square indeed, and Mrs. +Todd, who had a pretty hand at cutting out paper trimmings for haunches +of mutton, and could make flowers, ducks, &c., out of turnips and +carrots in a very creditable manner, would go to "the Square," as it +was called, and assist in the preparations incident to a great dinner, +without even so much as thinking of sitting down to the banquet. If +any guest failed at the eleventh hour, Todd was asked to dine. Mrs. +Todd and Maria came across in the evening, slipped in with a muffled +knock, and were in the drawing-room by the time Miss Osborne and the +ladies under her convoy reached that apartment--and ready to fire off +duets and sing until the gentlemen came up. Poor Maria Todd; poor +young lady! How she had to work and thrum at these duets and sonatas +in the Street, before they appeared in public in the Square! + +Thus it seemed to be decreed by fate that Georgy was to domineer over +everybody with whom he came in contact, and that friends, relatives, +and domestics were all to bow the knee before the little fellow. It +must be owned that he accommodated himself very willingly to this +arrangement. Most people do so. And Georgy liked to play the part of +master and perhaps had a natural aptitude for it. + +In Russell Square everybody was afraid of Mr. Osborne, and Mr. Osborne +was afraid of Georgy. The boy's dashing manners, and offhand rattle +about books and learning, his likeness to his father (dead unreconciled +in Brussels yonder) awed the old gentleman and gave the young boy the +mastery. The old man would start at some hereditary feature or tone +unconsciously used by the little lad, and fancy that George's father +was again before him. He tried by indulgence to the grandson to make +up for harshness to the elder George. People were surprised at his +gentleness to the boy. He growled and swore at Miss Osborne as usual, +and would smile when George came down late for breakfast. + +Miss Osborne, George's aunt, was a faded old spinster, broken down by +more than forty years of dulness and coarse usage. It was easy for a +lad of spirit to master her. And whenever George wanted anything from +her, from the jam-pots in her cupboards to the cracked and dry old +colours in her paint-box (the old paint-box which she had had when she +was a pupil of Mr. Smee and was still almost young and blooming), +Georgy took possession of the object of his desire, which obtained, he +took no further notice of his aunt. + +For his friends and cronies, he had a pompous old schoolmaster, who +flattered him, and a toady, his senior, whom he could thrash. It was +dear Mrs. Todd's delight to leave him with her youngest daughter, Rosa +Jemima, a darling child of eight years old. The little pair looked so +well together, she would say (but not to the folks in "the Square," we +may be sure) "who knows what might happen? Don't they make a pretty +little couple?" the fond mother thought. + +The broken-spirited, old, maternal grandfather was likewise subject to +the little tyrant. He could not help respecting a lad who had such +fine clothes and rode with a groom behind him. Georgy, on his side, +was in the constant habit of hearing coarse abuse and vulgar satire +levelled at John Sedley by his pitiless old enemy, Mr. Osborne. +Osborne used to call the other the old pauper, the old coal-man, the +old bankrupt, and by many other such names of brutal contumely. How +was little George to respect a man so prostrate? A few months after he +was with his paternal grandfather, Mrs. Sedley died. There had been +little love between her and the child. He did not care to show much +grief. He came down to visit his mother in a fine new suit of +mourning, and was very angry that he could not go to a play upon which +he had set his heart. + +The illness of that old lady had been the occupation and perhaps the +safeguard of Amelia. What do men know about women's martyrdoms? We +should go mad had we to endure the hundredth part of those daily pains +which are meekly borne by many women. Ceaseless slavery meeting with +no reward; constant gentleness and kindness met by cruelty as constant; +love, labour, patience, watchfulness, without even so much as the +acknowledgement of a good word; all this, how many of them have to bear +in quiet, and appear abroad with cheerful faces as if they felt +nothing. Tender slaves that they are, they must needs be hypocrites +and weak. + +From her chair Amelia's mother had taken to her bed, which she had +never left, and from which Mrs. Osborne herself was never absent except +when she ran to see George. The old lady grudged her even those rare +visits; she, who had been a kind, smiling, good-natured mother once, in +the days of her prosperity, but whom poverty and infirmities had broken +down. Her illness or estrangement did not affect Amelia. They rather +enabled her to support the other calamity under which she was +suffering, and from the thoughts of which she was kept by the ceaseless +calls of the invalid. Amelia bore her harshness quite gently; smoothed +the uneasy pillow; was always ready with a soft answer to the watchful, +querulous voice; soothed the sufferer with words of hope, such as her +pious simple heart could best feel and utter, and closed the eyes that +had once looked so tenderly upon her. + +Then all her time and tenderness were devoted to the consolation and +comfort of the bereaved old father, who was stunned by the blow which +had befallen him, and stood utterly alone in the world. His wife, his +honour, his fortune, everything he loved best had fallen away from him. +There was only Amelia to stand by and support with her gentle arms the +tottering, heart-broken old man. We are not going to write the history: +it would be too dreary and stupid. I can see Vanity Fair yawning over +it d'avance. + +One day as the young gentlemen were assembled in the study at the Rev. +Mr. Veal's, and the domestic chaplain to the Right Honourable the Earl +of Bareacres was spouting away as usual, a smart carriage drove up to +the door decorated with the statue of Athene, and two gentlemen stepped +out. The young Masters Bangles rushed to the window with a vague +notion that their father might have arrived from Bombay. The great +hulking scholar of three-and-twenty, who was crying secretly over a +passage of Eutropius, flattened his neglected nose against the panes +and looked at the drag, as the laquais de place sprang from the box and +let out the persons in the carriage. + +"It's a fat one and a thin one," Mr. Bluck said as a thundering knock +came to the door. + +Everybody was interested, from the domestic chaplain himself, who hoped +he saw the fathers of some future pupils, down to Master Georgy, glad +of any pretext for laying his book down. + +The boy in the shabby livery with the faded copper buttons, who always +thrust himself into the tight coat to open the door, came into the +study and said, "Two gentlemen want to see Master Osborne." The +professor had had a trifling altercation in the morning with that young +gentleman, owing to a difference about the introduction of crackers in +school-time; but his face resumed its habitual expression of bland +courtesy as he said, "Master Osborne, I give you full permission to go +and see your carriage friends--to whom I beg you to convey the +respectful compliments of myself and Mrs. Veal." + +Georgy went into the reception-room and saw two strangers, whom he +looked at with his head up, in his usual haughty manner. One was fat, +with mustachios, and the other was lean and long, in a blue frock-coat, +with a brown face and a grizzled head. + +"My God, how like he is!" said the long gentleman with a start. "Can +you guess who we are, George?" + +The boy's face flushed up, as it did usually when he was moved, and his +eyes brightened. "I don't know the other," he said, "but I should +think you must be Major Dobbin." + +Indeed it was our old friend. His voice trembled with pleasure as he +greeted the boy, and taking both the other's hands in his own, drew the +lad to him. + +"Your mother has talked to you about me--has she?" he said. + +"That she has," Georgy answered, "hundreds and hundreds of times." + + + +CHAPTER LVII + +Eothen + +It was one of the many causes for personal pride with which old Osborne +chose to recreate himself that Sedley, his ancient rival, enemy, and +benefactor, was in his last days so utterly defeated and humiliated as +to be forced to accept pecuniary obligations at the hands of the man +who had most injured and insulted him. The successful man of the world +cursed the old pauper and relieved him from time to time. As he +furnished George with money for his mother, he gave the boy to +understand by hints, delivered in his brutal, coarse way, that George's +maternal grandfather was but a wretched old bankrupt and dependant, and +that John Sedley might thank the man to whom he already owed ever so +much money for the aid which his generosity now chose to administer. +George carried the pompous supplies to his mother and the shattered old +widower whom it was now the main business of her life to tend and +comfort. The little fellow patronized the feeble and disappointed old +man. + +It may have shown a want of "proper pride" in Amelia that she chose to +accept these money benefits at the hands of her father's enemy. But +proper pride and this poor lady had never had much acquaintance +together. A disposition naturally simple and demanding protection; a +long course of poverty and humility, of daily privations, and hard +words, of kind offices and no returns, had been her lot ever since +womanhood almost, or since her luckless marriage with George Osborne. +You who see your betters bearing up under this shame every day, meekly +suffering under the slights of fortune, gentle and unpitied, poor, and +rather despised for their poverty, do you ever step down from your +prosperity and wash the feet of these poor wearied beggars? The very +thought of them is odious and low. "There must be classes--there must +be rich and poor," Dives says, smacking his claret (it is well if he +even sends the broken meat out to Lazarus sitting under the window). +Very true; but think how mysterious and often unaccountable it is--that +lottery of life which gives to this man the purple and fine linen and +sends to the other rags for garments and dogs for comforters. + +So I must own that, without much repining, on the contrary with +something akin to gratitude, Amelia took the crumbs that her father-in-law +let drop now and then, and with them fed her own parent. +Directly she understood it to be her duty, it was this young woman's +nature (ladies, she is but thirty still, and we choose to call her a +young woman even at that age) it was, I say, her nature to sacrifice +herself and to fling all that she had at the feet of the beloved +object. During what long thankless nights had she worked out her +fingers for little Georgy whilst at home with her; what buffets, +scorns, privations, poverties had she endured for father and mother! +And in the midst of all these solitary resignations and unseen +sacrifices, she did not respect herself any more than the world +respected her, but I believe thought in her heart that she was a +poor-spirited, despicable little creature, whose luck in life was only +too good for her merits. O you poor women! O you poor secret martyrs +and victims, whose life is a torture, who are stretched on racks in +your bedrooms, and who lay your heads down on the block daily at the +drawing-room table; every man who watches your pains, or peers into +those dark places where the torture is administered to you, must pity +you--and--and thank God that he has a beard. I recollect seeing, years +ago, at the prisons for idiots and madmen at Bicetre, near Paris, a +poor wretch bent down under the bondage of his imprisonment and his +personal infirmity, to whom one of our party gave a halfpenny worth of +snuff in a cornet or "screw" of paper. The kindness was too much for +the poor epileptic creature. He cried in an anguish of delight and +gratitude: if anybody gave you and me a thousand a year, or saved our +lives, we could not be so affected. And so, if you properly tyrannize +over a woman, you will find a ha'p'orth of kindness act upon her and +bring tears into her eyes, as though you were an angel benefiting her. + +Some such boons as these were the best which Fortune allotted to poor +little Amelia. Her life, begun not unprosperously, had come down to +this--to a mean prison and a long, ignoble bondage. Little George +visited her captivity sometimes and consoled it with feeble gleams of +encouragement. Russell Square was the boundary of her prison: she +might walk thither occasionally, but was always back to sleep in her +cell at night; to perform cheerless duties; to watch by thankless +sick-beds; to suffer the harassment and tyranny of querulous +disappointed old age. How many thousands of people are there, women +for the most part, who are doomed to endure this long slavery?--who are +hospital nurses without wages--sisters of Charity, if you like, without +the romance and the sentiment of sacrifice--who strive, fast, watch, +and suffer, unpitied, and fade away ignobly and unknown. + +The hidden and awful Wisdom which apportions the destinies of mankind +is pleased so to humiliate and cast down the tender, good, and wise, +and to set up the selfish, the foolish, or the wicked. Oh, be humble, +my brother, in your prosperity! Be gentle with those who are less +lucky, if not more deserving. Think, what right have you to be +scornful, whose virtue is a deficiency of temptation, whose success may +be a chance, whose rank may be an ancestor's accident, whose prosperity +is very likely a satire. + +They buried Amelia's mother in the churchyard at Brompton, upon just +such a rainy, dark day as Amelia recollected when first she had been +there to marry George. Her little boy sat by her side in pompous new +sables. She remembered the old pew-woman and clerk. Her thoughts were +away in other times as the parson read. But that she held George's hand +in her own, perhaps she would have liked to change places with.... +Then, as usual, she felt ashamed of her selfish thoughts and prayed +inwardly to be strengthened to do her duty. + +So she determined with all her might and strength to try and make her +old father happy. She slaved, toiled, patched, and mended, sang and +played backgammon, read out the newspaper, cooked dishes for old +Sedley, walked him out sedulously into Kensington Gardens or the +Brompton Lanes, listened to his stories with untiring smiles and +affectionate hypocrisy, or sat musing by his side and communing with +her own thoughts and reminiscences, as the old man, feeble and +querulous, sunned himself on the garden benches and prattled about his +wrongs or his sorrows. What sad, unsatisfactory thoughts those of the +widow were! The children running up and down the slopes and broad +paths in the gardens reminded her of George, who was taken from her; +the first George was taken from her; her selfish, guilty love, in both +instances, had been rebuked and bitterly chastised. She strove to think +it was right that she should be so punished. She was such a miserable +wicked sinner. She was quite alone in the world. + +I know that the account of this kind of solitary imprisonment is +insufferably tedious, unless there is some cheerful or humorous +incident to enliven it--a tender gaoler, for instance, or a waggish +commandant of the fortress, or a mouse to come out and play about +Latude's beard and whiskers, or a subterranean passage under the +castle, dug by Trenck with his nails and a toothpick: the historian +has no such enlivening incident to relate in the narrative of Amelia's +captivity. Fancy her, if you please, during this period, very sad, but +always ready to smile when spoken to; in a very mean, poor, not to say +vulgar position of life; singing songs, making puddings, playing cards, +mending stockings, for her old father's benefit. So, never mind, +whether she be a heroine or no; or you and I, however old, scolding, +and bankrupt--may we have in our last days a kind soft shoulder on +which to lean and a gentle hand to soothe our gouty old pillows. + +Old Sedley grew very fond of his daughter after his wife's death, and +Amelia had her consolation in doing her duty by the old man. + +But we are not going to leave these two people long in such a low and +ungenteel station of life. Better days, as far as worldly prosperity +went, were in store for both. Perhaps the ingenious reader has guessed +who was the stout gentleman who called upon Georgy at his school in +company with our old friend Major Dobbin. It was another old +acquaintance returned to England, and at a time when his presence was +likely to be of great comfort to his relatives there. + +Major Dobbin having easily succeeded in getting leave from his +good-natured commandant to proceed to Madras, and thence probably to +Europe, on urgent private affairs, never ceased travelling night and day +until he reached his journey's end, and had directed his march with such +celerity that he arrived at Madras in a high fever. His servants who +accompanied him brought him to the house of the friend with whom he had +resolved to stay until his departure for Europe in a state of delirium; +and it was thought for many, many days that he would never travel +farther than the burying-ground of the church of St. George's, where +the troops should fire a salvo over his grave, and where many a gallant +officer lies far away from his home. + +Here, as the poor fellow lay tossing in his fever, the people who +watched him might have heard him raving about Amelia. The idea that he +should never see her again depressed him in his lucid hours. He +thought his last day was come, and he made his solemn preparations for +departure, setting his affairs in this world in order and leaving the +little property of which he was possessed to those whom he most desired +to benefit. The friend in whose house he was located witnessed his +testament. He desired to be buried with a little brown hair-chain +which he wore round his neck and which, if the truth must be known, he +had got from Amelia's maid at Brussels, when the young widow's hair was +cut off, during the fever which prostrated her after the death of +George Osborne on the plateau at Mount St. John. + +He recovered, rallied, relapsed again, having undergone such a process +of blood-letting and calomel as showed the strength of his original +constitution. He was almost a skeleton when they put him on board the +Ramchunder East Indiaman, Captain Bragg, from Calcutta, touching at +Madras, and so weak and prostrate that his friend who had tended him +through his illness prophesied that the honest Major would never +survive the voyage, and that he would pass some morning, shrouded in +flag and hammock, over the ship's side, and carrying down to the sea +with him the relic that he wore at his heart. But whether it was the +sea air, or the hope which sprung up in him afresh, from the day that +the ship spread her canvas and stood out of the roads towards home, our +friend began to amend, and he was quite well (though as gaunt as a +greyhound) before they reached the Cape. "Kirk will be disappointed of +his majority this time," he said with a smile; "he will expect to find +himself gazetted by the time the regiment reaches home." For it must be +premised that while the Major was lying ill at Madras, having made such +prodigious haste to go thither, the gallant --th, which had passed many +years abroad, which after its return from the West Indies had been +baulked of its stay at home by the Waterloo campaign, and had been +ordered from Flanders to India, had received orders home; and the Major +might have accompanied his comrades, had he chosen to wait for their +arrival at Madras. + +Perhaps he was not inclined to put himself in his exhausted state again +under the guardianship of Glorvina. "I think Miss O'Dowd would have +done for me," he said laughingly to a fellow-passenger, "if we had had +her on board, and when she had sunk me, she would have fallen upon you, +depend upon it, and carried you in as a prize to Southampton, Jos, my +boy." + +For indeed it was no other than our stout friend who was also a +passenger on board the Ramchunder. He had passed ten years in Bengal. +Constant dinners, tiffins, pale ale and claret, the prodigious labour +of cutcherry, and the refreshment of brandy-pawnee which he was forced +to take there, had their effect upon Waterloo Sedley. A voyage to +Europe was pronounced necessary for him--and having served his full +time in India and had fine appointments which had enabled him to lay by +a considerable sum of money, he was free to come home and stay with a +good pension, or to return and resume that rank in the service to which +his seniority and his vast talents entitled him. + +He was rather thinner than when we last saw him, but had gained in +majesty and solemnity of demeanour. He had resumed the mustachios to +which his services at Waterloo entitled him, and swaggered about on +deck in a magnificent velvet cap with a gold band and a profuse +ornamentation of pins and jewellery about his person. He took breakfast +in his cabin and dressed as solemnly to appear on the quarter-deck as +if he were going to turn out for Bond Street, or the Course at +Calcutta. He brought a native servant with him, who was his valet and +pipe-bearer and who wore the Sedley crest in silver on his turban. +That oriental menial had a wretched life under the tyranny of Jos +Sedley. Jos was as vain of his person as a woman, and took as long a +time at his toilette as any fading beauty. The youngsters among the +passengers, Young Chaffers of the 150th, and poor little Ricketts, +coming home after his third fever, used to draw out Sedley at the +cuddy-table and make him tell prodigious stories about himself and his +exploits against tigers and Napoleon. He was great when he visited the +Emperor's tomb at Longwood, when to these gentlemen and the young +officers of the ship, Major Dobbin not being by, he described the whole +battle of Waterloo and all but announced that Napoleon never would have +gone to Saint Helena at all but for him, Jos Sedley. + +After leaving St. Helena he became very generous, disposing of a great +quantity of ship stores, claret, preserved meats, and great casks +packed with soda-water, brought out for his private delectation. There +were no ladies on board; the Major gave the pas of precedency to the +civilian, so that he was the first dignitary at table, and treated by +Captain Bragg and the officers of the Ramchunder with the respect which +his rank warranted. He disappeared rather in a panic during a +two-days' gale, in which he had the portholes of his cabin battened +down, and remained in his cot reading the Washerwoman of Finchley +Common, left on board the Ramchunder by the Right Honourable the Lady +Emily Hornblower, wife of the Rev. Silas Hornblower, when on their +passage out to the Cape, where the Reverend gentleman was a missionary; +but, for common reading, he had brought a stock of novels and plays +which he lent to the rest of the ship, and rendered himself agreeable +to all by his kindness and condescension. + +Many and many a night as the ship was cutting through the roaring dark +sea, the moon and stars shining overhead and the bell singing out the +watch, Mr. Sedley and the Major would sit on the quarter-deck of the +vessel talking about home, as the Major smoked his cheroot and the +civilian puffed at the hookah which his servant prepared for him. + +In these conversations it was wonderful with what perseverance and +ingenuity Major Dobbin would manage to bring the talk round to the +subject of Amelia and her little boy. Jos, a little testy about his +father's misfortunes and unceremonious applications to him, was soothed +down by the Major, who pointed out the elder's ill fortunes and old +age. He would not perhaps like to live with the old couple, whose ways +and hours might not agree with those of a younger man, accustomed to +different society (Jos bowed at this compliment); but, the Major +pointed out, how advantageous it would be for Jos Sedley to have a +house of his own in London, and not a mere bachelor's establishment as +before; how his sister Amelia would be the very person to preside over +it; how elegant, how gentle she was, and of what refined good manners. +He recounted stories of the success which Mrs. George Osborne had had +in former days at Brussels, and in London, where she was much admired +by people of very great fashion; and he then hinted how becoming it +would be for Jos to send Georgy to a good school and make a man of him, +for his mother and her parents would be sure to spoil him. In a word, +this artful Major made the civilian promise to take charge of Amelia +and her unprotected child. He did not know as yet what events had +happened in the little Sedley family, and how death had removed the +mother, and riches had carried off George from Amelia. But the fact is +that every day and always, this love-smitten and middle-aged gentleman +was thinking about Mrs. Osborne, and his whole heart was bent upon +doing her good. He coaxed, wheedled, cajoled, and complimented Jos +Sedley with a perseverance and cordiality of which he was not aware +himself, very likely; but some men who have unmarried sisters or +daughters even, may remember how uncommonly agreeable gentlemen are to +the male relations when they are courting the females; and perhaps this +rogue of a Dobbin was urged by a similar hypocrisy. + +The truth is, when Major Dobbin came on board the Ramchumder, very +sick, and for the three days she lay in the Madras Roads, he did not +begin to rally, nor did even the appearance and recognition of his old +acquaintance, Mr. Sedley, on board much cheer him, until after a +conversation which they had one day, as the Major was laid languidly on +the deck. He said then he thought he was doomed; he had left a little +something to his godson in his will, and he trusted Mrs. Osborne would +remember him kindly and be happy in the marriage she was about to make. +"Married? not the least," Jos answered; "he had heard from her: she +made no mention of the marriage, and by the way, it was curious, she +wrote to say that Major Dobbin was going to be married, and hoped that +HE would be happy." What were the dates of Sedley's letters from +Europe? The civilian fetched them. They were two months later than the +Major's; and the ship's surgeon congratulated himself upon the +treatment adopted by him towards his new patient, who had been +consigned to shipboard by the Madras practitioner with very small hopes +indeed; for, from that day, the very day that he changed the draught, +Major Dobbin began to mend. And thus it was that deserving officer, +Captain Kirk, was disappointed of his majority. + +After they passed St. Helena, Major Dobbin's gaiety and strength was +such as to astonish all his fellow passengers. He larked with the +midshipmen, played single-stick with the mates, ran up the shrouds like +a boy, sang a comic song one night to the amusement of the whole party +assembled over their grog after supper, and rendered himself so gay, +lively, and amiable that even Captain Bragg, who thought there was +nothing in his passenger, and considered he was a poor-spirited feller +at first, was constrained to own that the Major was a reserved but +well-informed and meritorious officer. "He ain't got distangy manners, +dammy," Bragg observed to his first mate; "he wouldn't do at Government +House, Roper, where his Lordship and Lady William was as kind to me, +and shook hands with me before the whole company, and asking me at +dinner to take beer with him, before the Commander-in-Chief himself; he +ain't got manners, but there's something about him--" And thus Captain +Bragg showed that he possessed discrimination as a man, as well as +ability as a commander. + +But a calm taking place when the Ramchunder was within ten days' sail +of England, Dobbin became so impatient and ill-humoured as to surprise +those comrades who had before admired his vivacity and good temper. He +did not recover until the breeze sprang up again, and was in a highly +excited state when the pilot came on board. Good God, how his heart +beat as the two friendly spires of Southampton came in sight. + + + +CHAPTER LVIII + +Our Friend the Major + +Our Major had rendered himself so popular on board the Ramchunder that +when he and Mr. Sedley descended into the welcome shore-boat which was +to take them from the ship, the whole crew, men and officers, the great +Captain Bragg himself leading off, gave three cheers for Major Dobbin, +who blushed very much and ducked his head in token of thanks. Jos, who +very likely thought the cheers were for himself, took off his +gold-laced cap and waved it majestically to his friends, and they were +pulled to shore and landed with great dignity at the pier, whence they +proceeded to the Royal George Hotel. + +Although the sight of that magnificent round of beef, and the silver +tankard suggestive of real British home-brewed ale and porter, which +perennially greet the eyes of the traveller returning from foreign +parts who enters the coffee-room of the George, are so invigorating and +delightful that a man entering such a comfortable snug homely English +inn might well like to stop some days there, yet Dobbin began to talk +about a post-chaise instantly, and was no sooner at Southampton than he +wished to be on the road to London. Jos, however, would not hear of +moving that evening. Why was he to pass a night in a post-chaise +instead of a great large undulating downy feather-bed which was there +ready to replace the horrid little narrow crib in which the portly +Bengal gentleman had been confined during the voyage? He could not +think of moving till his baggage was cleared, or of travelling until he +could do so with his chillum. So the Major was forced to wait over +that night, and dispatched a letter to his family announcing his +arrival, entreating from Jos a promise to write to his own friends. +Jos promised, but didn't keep his promise. The Captain, the surgeon, +and one or two passengers came and dined with our two gentlemen at the +inn, Jos exerting himself in a sumptuous way in ordering the dinner and +promising to go to town the next day with the Major. The landlord said +it did his eyes good to see Mr. Sedley take off his first pint of +porter. If I had time and dared to enter into digressions, I would +write a chapter about that first pint of porter drunk upon English +ground. Ah, how good it is! It is worth-while to leave home for a +year, just to enjoy that one draught. + +Major Dobbin made his appearance the next morning very neatly shaved +and dressed, according to his wont. Indeed, it was so early in the +morning that nobody was up in the house except that wonderful Boots of +an inn who never seems to want sleep; and the Major could hear the +snores of the various inmates of the house roaring through the +corridors as he creaked about in those dim passages. Then the +sleepless Boots went shirking round from door to door, gathering up at +each the Bluchers, Wellingtons, Oxonians, which stood outside. Then +Jos's native servant arose and began to get ready his master's +ponderous dressing apparatus and prepare his hookah; then the +maidservants got up, and meeting the dark man in the passages, +shrieked, and mistook him for the devil. He and Dobbin stumbled over +their pails in the passages as they were scouring the decks of the +Royal George. When the first unshorn waiter appeared and unbarred the +door of the inn, the Major thought that the time for departure was +arrived, and ordered a post-chaise to be fetched instantly, that they +might set off. + +He then directed his steps to Mr. Sedley's room and opened the curtains +of the great large family bed wherein Mr. Jos was snoring. "Come, up! +Sedley," the Major said, "it's time to be off; the chaise will be at +the door in half an hour." + +Jos growled from under the counterpane to know what the time was; but +when he at last extorted from the blushing Major (who never told fibs, +however they might be to his advantage) what was the real hour of the +morning, he broke out into a volley of bad language, which we will not +repeat here, but by which he gave Dobbin to understand that he would +jeopardy his soul if he got up at that moment, that the Major might go +and be hanged, that he would not travel with Dobbin, and that it was +most unkind and ungentlemanlike to disturb a man out of his sleep in +that way; on which the discomfited Major was obliged to retreat, +leaving Jos to resume his interrupted slumbers. + +The chaise came up presently, and the Major would wait no longer. + +If he had been an English nobleman travelling on a pleasure tour, or a +newspaper courier bearing dispatches (government messages are generally +carried much more quietly), he could not have travelled more quickly. +The post-boys wondered at the fees he flung amongst them. How happy and +green the country looked as the chaise whirled rapidly from mile-stone +to mile-stone, through neat country towns where landlords came out to +welcome him with smiles and bows; by pretty roadside inns, where the +signs hung on the elms, and horses and waggoners were drinking under +the chequered shadow of the trees; by old halls and parks; rustic +hamlets clustered round ancient grey churches--and through the charming +friendly English landscape. Is there any in the world like it? To a +traveller returning home it looks so kind--it seems to shake hands with +you as you pass through it. Well, Major Dobbin passed through all this +from Southampton to London, and without noting much beyond the +milestones along the road. You see he was so eager to see his parents +at Camberwell. + +He grudged the time lost between Piccadilly and his old haunt at the +Slaughters', whither he drove faithfully. Long years had passed since +he saw it last, since he and George, as young men, had enjoyed many a +feast, and held many a revel there. He had now passed into the stage +of old-fellow-hood. His hair was grizzled, and many a passion and +feeling of his youth had grown grey in that interval. There, however, +stood the old waiter at the door, in the same greasy black suit, with +the same double chin and flaccid face, with the same huge bunch of +seals at his fob, rattling his money in his pockets as before, and +receiving the Major as if he had gone away only a week ago. "Put the +Major's things in twenty-three, that's his room," John said, exhibiting +not the least surprise. "Roast fowl for your dinner, I suppose. You +ain't got married? They said you was married--the Scotch surgeon of +yours was here. No, it was Captain Humby of the thirty-third, as was +quartered with the --th in Injee. Like any warm water? What do you come +in a chay for--ain't the coach good enough?" And with this, the +faithful waiter, who knew and remembered every officer who used the +house, and with whom ten years were but as yesterday, led the way up to +Dobbin's old room, where stood the great moreen bed, and the shabby +carpet, a thought more dingy, and all the old black furniture covered +with faded chintz, just as the Major recollected them in his youth. + +He remembered George pacing up and down the room, and biting his nails, +and swearing that the Governor must come round, and that if he didn't, +he didn't care a straw, on the day before he was married. He could +fancy him walking in, banging the door of Dobbin's room, and his own +hard by-- + +"You ain't got young," John said, calmly surveying his friend of former +days. + +Dobbin laughed. "Ten years and a fever don't make a man young, John," +he said. "It is you that are always young--no, you are always old." + +"What became of Captain Osborne's widow?" John said. "Fine young +fellow that. Lord, how he used to spend his money. He never came back +after that day he was marched from here. He owes me three pound at +this minute. Look here, I have it in my book. 'April 10, 1815, +Captain Osborne: 3 pounds.' I wonder whether his father would pay +me," and so saying, John of the Slaughters' pulled out the very morocco +pocket-book in which he had noted his loan to the Captain, upon a +greasy faded page still extant, with many other scrawled memoranda +regarding the bygone frequenters of the house. + +Having inducted his customer into the room, John retired with perfect +calmness; and Major Dobbin, not without a blush and a grin at his own +absurdity, chose out of his kit the very smartest and most becoming +civil costume he possessed, and laughed at his own tanned face and grey +hair, as he surveyed them in the dreary little toilet-glass on the +dressing-table. + +"I'm glad old John didn't forget me," he thought. "She'll know me, too, +I hope." And he sallied out of the inn, bending his steps once more in +the direction of Brompton. + +Every minute incident of his last meeting with Amelia was present to +the constant man's mind as he walked towards her house. The arch and +the Achilles statue were up since he had last been in Piccadilly; a +hundred changes had occurred which his eye and mind vaguely noted. He +began to tremble as he walked up the lane from Brompton, that +well-remembered lane leading to the street where she lived. Was she +going to be married or not? If he were to meet her with the little +boy--Good God, what should he do? He saw a woman coming to him with a +child of five years old--was that she? He began to shake at the mere +possibility. When he came up to the row of houses, at last, where she +lived, and to the gate, he caught hold of it and paused. He might have +heard the thumping of his own heart. "May God Almighty bless her, +whatever has happened," he thought to himself. "Psha! she may be gone +from here," he said and went in through the gate. + +The window of the parlour which she used to occupy was open, and there +were no inmates in the room. The Major thought he recognized the +piano, though, with the picture over it, as it used to be in former +days, and his perturbations were renewed. Mr. Clapp's brass plate was +still on the door, at the knocker of which Dobbin performed a summons. + +A buxom-looking lass of sixteen, with bright eyes and purple cheeks, +came to answer the knock and looked hard at the Major as he leant back +against the little porch. + +He was as pale as a ghost and could hardly falter out the words--"Does +Mrs. Osborne live here?" + +She looked him hard in the face for a moment--and then turning white +too--said, "Lord bless me--it's Major Dobbin." She held out both her +hands shaking--"Don't you remember me?" she said. "I used to call you +Major Sugarplums." On which, and I believe it was for the first time +that he ever so conducted himself in his life, the Major took the girl +in his arms and kissed her. She began to laugh and cry hysterically, +and calling out "Ma, Pa!" with all her voice, brought up those worthy +people, who had already been surveying the Major from the casement of +the ornamental kitchen, and were astonished to find their daughter in +the little passage in the embrace of a great tall man in a blue +frock-coat and white duck trousers. + +"I'm an old friend," he said--not without blushing though. "Don't you +remember me, Mrs. Clapp, and those good cakes you used to make for tea? +Don't you recollect me, Clapp? I'm George's godfather, and just come +back from India." A great shaking of hands ensued--Mrs. Clapp was +greatly affected and delighted; she called upon heaven to interpose a +vast many times in that passage. + +The landlord and landlady of the house led the worthy Major into the +Sedleys' room (whereof he remembered every single article of furniture, +from the old brass ornamented piano, once a natty little instrument, +Stothard maker, to the screens and the alabaster miniature tombstone, +in the midst of which ticked Mr. Sedley's gold watch), and there, as he +sat down in the lodger's vacant arm-chair, the father, the mother, and +the daughter, with a thousand ejaculatory breaks in the narrative, +informed Major Dobbin of what we know already, but of particulars in +Amelia's history of which he was not aware--namely of Mrs. Sedley's +death, of George's reconcilement with his grandfather Osborne, of the +way in which the widow took on at leaving him, and of other particulars +of her life. Twice or thrice he was going to ask about the marriage +question, but his heart failed him. He did not care to lay it bare to +these people. Finally, he was informed that Mrs. O. was gone to walk +with her pa in Kensington Gardens, whither she always went with the old +gentleman (who was very weak and peevish now, and led her a sad life, +though she behaved to him like an angel, to be sure), of a fine +afternoon, after dinner. + +"I'm very much pressed for time," the Major said, "and have business +to-night of importance. I should like to see Mrs. Osborne tho'. +Suppose Miss Polly would come with me and show me the way?" + +Miss Polly was charmed and astonished at this proposal. She knew the +way. She would show Major Dobbin. She had often been with Mr. Sedley +when Mrs. O. was gone--was gone Russell Square way--and knew the bench +where he liked to sit. She bounced away to her apartment and appeared +presently in her best bonnet and her mamma's yellow shawl and large +pebble brooch, of which she assumed the loan in order to make herself a +worthy companion for the Major. + +That officer, then, in his blue frock-coat and buckskin gloves, gave +the young lady his arm, and they walked away very gaily. He was glad +to have a friend at hand for the scene which he dreaded somehow. He +asked a thousand more questions from his companion about Amelia: his +kind heart grieved to think that she should have had to part with her +son. How did she bear it? Did she see him often? Was Mr. Sedley pretty +comfortable now in a worldly point of view? Polly answered all these +questions of Major Sugarplums to the very best of her power. + +And in the midst of their walk an incident occurred which, though very +simple in its nature, was productive of the greatest delight to Major +Dobbin. A pale young man with feeble whiskers and a stiff white +neckcloth came walking down the lane, en sandwich--having a lady, that +is, on each arm. One was a tall and commanding middle-aged female, +with features and a complexion similar to those of the clergyman of the +Church of England by whose side she marched, and the other a stunted +little woman with a dark face, ornamented by a fine new bonnet and +white ribbons, and in a smart pelisse, with a rich gold watch in the +midst of her person. The gentleman, pinioned as he was by these two +ladies, carried further a parasol, shawl, and basket, so that his arms +were entirely engaged, and of course he was unable to touch his hat in +acknowledgement of the curtsey with which Miss Mary Clapp greeted him. + +He merely bowed his head in reply to her salutation, which the two +ladies returned with a patronizing air, and at the same time looking +severely at the individual in the blue coat and bamboo cane who +accompanied Miss Polly. + +"Who's that?" asked the Major, amused by the group, and after he had +made way for the three to pass up the lane. Mary looked at him rather +roguishly. + +"That is our curate, the Reverend Mr. Binny (a twitch from Major +Dobbin), and his sister Miss B. Lord bless us, how she did use to +worret us at Sunday-school; and the other lady, the little one with a +cast in her eye and the handsome watch, is Mrs. Binny--Miss Grits that +was; her pa was a grocer, and kept the Little Original Gold Tea Pot in +Kensington Gravel Pits. They were married last month, and are just +come back from Margate. She's five thousand pound to her fortune; but +her and Miss B., who made the match, have quarrelled already." + +If the Major had twitched before, he started now, and slapped the +bamboo on the ground with an emphasis which made Miss Clapp cry, "Law," +and laugh too. He stood for a moment, silent, with open mouth, looking +after the retreating young couple, while Miss Mary told their history; +but he did not hear beyond the announcement of the reverend gentleman's +marriage; his head was swimming with felicity. After this rencontre he +began to walk double quick towards the place of his destination--and +yet they were too soon (for he was in a great tremor at the idea of a +meeting for which he had been longing any time these ten +years)--through the Brompton lanes, and entering at the little old +portal in Kensington Garden wall. + +"There they are," said Miss Polly, and she felt him again start back on +her arm. She was a confidante at once of the whole business. She knew +the story as well as if she had read it in one of her favourite +novel-books--Fatherless Fanny, or the Scottish Chiefs. + +"Suppose you were to run on and tell her," the Major said. Polly ran +forward, her yellow shawl streaming in the breeze. + +Old Sedley was seated on a bench, his handkerchief placed over his +knees, prattling away, according to his wont, with some old story about +old times to which Amelia had listened and awarded a patient smile many +a time before. She could of late think of her own affairs, and smile +or make other marks of recognition of her father's stories, scarcely +hearing a word of the old man's tales. As Mary came bouncing along, and +Amelia caught sight of her, she started up from her bench. Her first +thought was that something had happened to Georgy, but the sight of the +messenger's eager and happy face dissipated that fear in the timorous +mother's bosom. + +"News! News!" cried the emissary of Major Dobbin. "He's come! He's +come!" + +"Who is come?" said Emmy, still thinking of her son. + +"Look there," answered Miss Clapp, turning round and pointing; in which +direction Amelia looking, saw Dobbin's lean figure and long shadow +stalking across the grass. Amelia started in her turn, blushed up, +and, of course, began to cry. At all this simple little creature's +fetes, the grandes eaux were accustomed to play. He looked at her--oh, +how fondly--as she came running towards him, her hands before her, +ready to give them to him. She wasn't changed. She was a little pale, +a little stouter in figure. Her eyes were the same, the kind trustful +eyes. There were scarce three lines of silver in her soft brown hair. +She gave him both her hands as she looked up flushing and smiling +through her tears into his honest homely face. He took the two little +hands between his two and held them there. He was speechless for a +moment. Why did he not take her in his arms and swear that he would +never leave her? She must have yielded: she could not but have obeyed +him. + +"I--I've another arrival to announce," he said after a pause. + +"Mrs. Dobbin?" Amelia said, making a movement back--why didn't he speak? + +"No," he said, letting her hands go: "Who has told you those lies? I +mean, your brother Jos came in the same ship with me, and is come home +to make you all happy." + +"Papa, Papa!" Emmy cried out, "here are news! My brother is in +England. He is come to take care of you. Here is Major Dobbin." + +Mr. Sedley started up, shaking a great deal and gathering up his +thoughts. Then he stepped forward and made an old-fashioned bow to the +Major, whom he called Mr. Dobbin, and hoped his worthy father, Sir +William, was quite well. He proposed to call upon Sir William, who had +done him the honour of a visit a short time ago. Sir William had not +called upon the old gentleman for eight years--it was that visit he was +thinking of returning. + +"He is very much shaken," Emmy whispered as Dobbin went up and +cordially shook hands with the old man. + +Although he had such particular business in London that evening, the +Major consented to forego it upon Mr. Sedley's invitation to him to +come home and partake of tea. Amelia put her arm under that of her +young friend with the yellow shawl and headed the party on their return +homewards, so that Mr. Sedley fell to Dobbin's share. The old man +walked very slowly and told a number of ancient histories about himself +and his poor Bessy, his former prosperity, and his bankruptcy. His +thoughts, as is usual with failing old men, were quite in former times. +The present, with the exception of the one catastrophe which he felt, +he knew little about. The Major was glad to let him talk on. His eyes +were fixed upon the figure in front of him--the dear little figure +always present to his imagination and in his prayers, and visiting his +dreams wakeful or slumbering. + +Amelia was very happy, smiling, and active all that evening, performing +her duties as hostess of the little entertainment with the utmost grace +and propriety, as Dobbin thought. His eyes followed her about as they +sat in the twilight. How many a time had he longed for that moment and +thought of her far away under hot winds and in weary marches, gentle +and happy, kindly ministering to the wants of old age, and decorating +poverty with sweet submission--as he saw her now. I do not say that +his taste was the highest, or that it is the duty of great intellects +to be content with a bread-and-butter paradise, such as sufficed our +simple old friend; but his desires were of this sort, whether for good +or bad, and, with Amelia to help him, he was as ready to drink as many +cups of tea as Doctor Johnson. + +Amelia seeing this propensity, laughingly encouraged it and looked +exceedingly roguish as she administered to him cup after cup. It is +true she did not know that the Major had had no dinner and that the +cloth was laid for him at the Slaughters', and a plate laid thereon to +mark that the table was retained, in that very box in which the Major +and George had sat many a time carousing, when she was a child just +come home from Miss Pinkerton's school. + +The first thing Mrs. Osborne showed the Major was Georgy's miniature, +for which she ran upstairs on her arrival at home. It was not half +handsome enough of course for the boy, but wasn't it noble of him to +think of bringing it to his mother? Whilst her papa was awake she did +not talk much about Georgy. To hear about Mr. Osborne and Russell +Square was not agreeable to the old man, who very likely was +unconscious that he had been living for some months past mainly on the +bounty of his richer rival, and lost his temper if allusion was made to +the other. + +Dobbin told him all, and a little more perhaps than all, that had +happened on board the Ramchunder, and exaggerated Jos's benevolent +dispositions towards his father and resolution to make him comfortable +in his old days. The truth is that during the voyage the Major had +impressed this duty most strongly upon his fellow-passenger and +extorted promises from him that he would take charge of his sister and +her child. He soothed Jos's irritation with regard to the bills which +the old gentleman had drawn upon him, gave a laughing account of his +own sufferings on the same score and of the famous consignment of wine +with which the old man had favoured him, and brought Mr. Jos, who was +by no means an ill-natured person when well-pleased and moderately +flattered, to a very good state of feeling regarding his relatives in +Europe. + +And in fine I am ashamed to say that the Major stretched the truth so +far as to tell old Mr. Sedley that it was mainly a desire to see his +parent which brought Jos once more to Europe. + +At his accustomed hour Mr. Sedley began to doze in his chair, and then +it was Amelia's opportunity to commence her conversation, which she did +with great eagerness--it related exclusively to Georgy. She did not +talk at all about her own sufferings at breaking from him, for indeed, +this worthy woman, though she was half-killed by the separation from +the child, yet thought it was very wicked in her to repine at losing +him; but everything concerning him, his virtues, talents, and +prospects, she poured out. She described his angelic beauty; narrated +a hundred instances of his generosity and greatness of mind whilst +living with her; how a Royal Duchess had stopped and admired him in +Kensington Gardens; how splendidly he was cared for now, and how he had +a groom and a pony; what quickness and cleverness he had, and what a +prodigiously well-read and delightful person the Reverend Lawrence Veal +was, George's master. "He knows EVERYTHING," Amelia said. "He has the +most delightful parties. You who are so learned yourself, and have +read so much, and are so clever and accomplished--don't shake your head +and say no--HE always used to say you were--you will be charmed with +Mr. Veal's parties. The last Tuesday in every month. He says there is +no place in the bar or the senate that Georgy may not aspire to. Look +here," and she went to the piano-drawer and drew out a theme of +Georgy's composition. This great effort of genius, which is still in +the possession of George's mother, is as follows: + +On Selfishness--Of all the vices which degrade the human character, +Selfishness is the most odious and contemptible. An undue love of Self +leads to the most monstrous crimes and occasions the greatest +misfortunes both in States and Families. As a selfish man will +impoverish his family and often bring them to ruin, so a selfish king +brings ruin on his people and often plunges them into war. + +Example: The selfishness of Achilles, as remarked by the poet Homer, +occasioned a thousand woes to the Greeks--muri Achaiois alge +etheke--(Hom. Il. A. 2). The selfishness of the late Napoleon Bonaparte +occasioned innumerable wars in Europe and caused him to perish, +himself, in a miserable island--that of Saint Helena in the Atlantic +Ocean. + +We see by these examples that we are not to consult our own interest +and ambition, but that we are to consider the interests of others as +well as our own. + +George S. Osborne Athene House, 24 April, 1827 + +"Think of him writing such a hand, and quoting Greek too, at his age," +the delighted mother said. "Oh, William," she added, holding out her +hand to the Major, "what a treasure Heaven has given me in that boy! +He is the comfort of my life--and he is the image of--of him that's +gone!" + +"Ought I to be angry with her for being faithful to him?" William +thought. "Ought I to be jealous of my friend in the grave, or hurt +that such a heart as Amelia's can love only once and for ever? Oh, +George, George, how little you knew the prize you had, though." This +sentiment passed rapidly through William's mind as he was holding +Amelia's hand, whilst the handkerchief was veiling her eyes. + +"Dear friend," she said, pressing the hand which held hers, "how good, +how kind you always have been to me! See! Papa is stirring. You will +go and see Georgy tomorrow, won't you?" + +"Not to-morrow," said poor old Dobbin. "I have business." He did not +like to own that he had not as yet been to his parents' and his dear +sister Anne--a remissness for which I am sure every well-regulated +person will blame the Major. And presently he took his leave, leaving +his address behind him for Jos, against the latter's arrival. And so +the first day was over, and he had seen her. + +When he got back to the Slaughters', the roast fowl was of course cold, +in which condition he ate it for supper. And knowing what early hours +his family kept, and that it would be needless to disturb their +slumbers at so late an hour, it is on record, that Major Dobbin treated +himself to half-price at the Haymarket Theatre that evening, where let +us hope he enjoyed himself. + + + +CHAPTER LIX + +The Old Piano + +The Major's visit left old John Sedley in a great state of agitation +and excitement. His daughter could not induce him to settle down to +his customary occupations or amusements that night. He passed the +evening fumbling amongst his boxes and desks, untying his papers with +trembling hands, and sorting and arranging them against Jos's arrival. +He had them in the greatest order--his tapes and his files, his +receipts, and his letters with lawyers and correspondents; the +documents relative to the wine project (which failed from a most +unaccountable accident, after commencing with the most splendid +prospects), the coal project (which only a want of capital prevented +from becoming the most successful scheme ever put before the public), +the patent saw-mills and sawdust consolidation project, &c., &c. All +night, until a very late hour, he passed in the preparation of these +documents, trembling about from one room to another, with a quivering +candle and shaky hands. Here's the wine papers, here's the sawdust, +here's the coals; here's my letters to Calcutta and Madras, and replies +from Major Dobbin, C.B., and Mr. Joseph Sedley to the same. "He shall +find no irregularity about ME, Emmy," the old gentleman said. + +Emmy smiled. "I don't think Jos will care about seeing those papers, +Papa," she said. + +"You don't know anything about business, my dear," answered the sire, +shaking his head with an important air. And it must be confessed that +on this point Emmy was very ignorant, and that is a pity some people +are so knowing. All these twopenny documents arranged on a side table, +old Sedley covered them carefully over with a clean bandanna +handkerchief (one out of Major Dobbin's lot) and enjoined the maid and +landlady of the house, in the most solemn way, not to disturb those +papers, which were arranged for the arrival of Mr. Joseph Sedley the +next morning, "Mr. Joseph Sedley of the Honourable East India Company's +Bengal Civil Service." + +Amelia found him up very early the next morning, more eager, more +hectic, and more shaky than ever. "I didn't sleep much, Emmy, my +dear," he said. "I was thinking of my poor Bessy. I wish she was +alive, to ride in Jos's carriage once again. She kept her own and +became it very well." And his eyes filled with tears, which trickled +down his furrowed old face. Amelia wiped them away, and smilingly +kissed him, and tied the old man's neckcloth in a smart bow, and put +his brooch into his best shirt frill, in which, in his Sunday suit of +mourning, he sat from six o'clock in the morning awaiting the arrival +of his son. + +However, when the postman made his appearance, the little party were +put out of suspense by the receipt of a letter from Jos to his sister, +who announced that he felt a little fatigued after his voyage, and +should not be able to move on that day, but that he would leave +Southampton early the next morning and be with his father and mother at +evening. Amelia, as she read out the letter to her father, paused over +the latter word; her brother, it was clear, did not know what had +happened in the family. Nor could he, for the fact is that, though the +Major rightly suspected that his travelling companion never would be +got into motion in so short a space as twenty-four hours, and would +find some excuse for delaying, yet Dobbin had not written to Jos to +inform him of the calamity which had befallen the Sedley family, being +occupied in talking with Amelia until long after post-hour. + +There are some splendid tailors' shops in the High Street of +Southampton, in the fine plate-glass windows of which hang gorgeous +waistcoats of all sorts, of silk and velvet, and gold and crimson, and +pictures of the last new fashions, in which those wonderful gentlemen +with quizzing glasses, and holding on to little boys with the exceeding +large eyes and curly hair, ogle ladies in riding habits prancing by the +Statue of Achilles at Apsley House. Jos, although provided with some +of the most splendid vests that Calcutta could furnish, thought he +could not go to town until he was supplied with one or two of these +garments, and selected a crimson satin, embroidered with gold +butterflies, and a black and red velvet tartan with white stripes and a +rolling collar, with which, and a rich blue satin stock and a gold pin, +consisting of a five-barred gate with a horseman in pink enamel jumping +over it, he thought he might make his entry into London with some +dignity. For Jos's former shyness and blundering blushing timidity had +given way to a more candid and courageous self-assertion of his worth. +"I don't care about owning it," Waterloo Sedley would say to his +friends, "I am a dressy man"; and though rather uneasy if the ladies +looked at him at the Government House balls, and though he blushed and +turned away alarmed under their glances, it was chiefly from a dread +lest they should make love to him that he avoided them, being averse to +marriage altogether. But there was no such swell in Calcutta as +Waterloo Sedley, I have heard say, and he had the handsomest turn-out, +gave the best bachelor dinners, and had the finest plate in the whole +place. + +To make these waistcoats for a man of his size and dignity took at +least a day, part of which he employed in hiring a servant to wait upon +him and his native and in instructing the agent who cleared his +baggage, his boxes, his books, which he never read, his chests of +mangoes, chutney, and curry-powders, his shawls for presents to people +whom he didn't know as yet, and the rest of his Persicos apparatus. + +At length, he drove leisurely to London on the third day and in the new +waistcoat, the native, with chattering teeth, shuddering in a shawl on +the box by the side of the new European servant; Jos puffing his pipe +at intervals within and looking so majestic that the little boys cried +Hooray, and many people thought he must be a Governor-General. HE, I +promise, did not decline the obsequious invitation of the landlords to +alight and refresh himself in the neat country towns. Having partaken +of a copious breakfast, with fish, and rice, and hard eggs, at +Southampton, he had so far rallied at Winchester as to think a glass of +sherry necessary. At Alton he stepped out of the carriage at his +servant's request and imbibed some of the ale for which the place is +famous. At Farnham he stopped to view the Bishop's Castle and to +partake of a light dinner of stewed eels, veal cutlets, and French +beans, with a bottle of claret. He was cold over Bagshot Heath, where +the native chattered more and more, and Jos Sahib took some +brandy-and-water; in fact, when he drove into town he was as full of +wine, beer, meat, pickles, cherry-brandy, and tobacco as the steward's +cabin of a steam-packet. It was evening when his carriage thundered up +to the little door in Brompton, whither the affectionate fellow drove +first, and before hieing to the apartments secured for him by Mr. +Dobbin at the Slaughters'. + +All the faces in the street were in the windows; the little maidservant +flew to the wicket-gate; the Mesdames Clapp looked out from the +casement of the ornamented kitchen; Emmy, in a great flutter, was in +the passage among the hats and coats; and old Sedley in the parlour +inside, shaking all over. Jos descended from the post-chaise and down +the creaking swaying steps in awful state, supported by the new valet +from Southampton and the shuddering native, whose brown face was now +livid with cold and of the colour of a turkey's gizzard. He created an +immense sensation in the passage presently, where Mrs. and Miss Clapp, +coming perhaps to listen at the parlour door, found Loll Jewab shaking +upon the hall-bench under the coats, moaning in a strange piteous way, +and showing his yellow eyeballs and white teeth. + +For, you see, we have adroitly shut the door upon the meeting between +Jos and the old father and the poor little gentle sister inside. The +old man was very much affected; so, of course, was his daughter; nor +was Jos without feeling. In that long absence of ten years, the most +selfish will think about home and early ties. Distance sanctifies both. +Long brooding over those lost pleasures exaggerates their charm and +sweetness. Jos was unaffectedly glad to see and shake the hand of his +father, between whom and himself there had been a coolness--glad to see +his little sister, whom he remembered so pretty and smiling, and pained +at the alteration which time, grief, and misfortune had made in the +shattered old man. Emmy had come out to the door in her black clothes +and whispered to him of her mother's death, and not to speak of it to +their father. There was no need of this caution, for the elder Sedley +himself began immediately to speak of the event, and prattled about it, +and wept over it plenteously. It shocked the Indian not a little and +made him think of himself less than the poor fellow was accustomed to +do. + +The result of the interview must have been very satisfactory, for when +Jos had reascended his post-chaise and had driven away to his hotel, +Emmy embraced her father tenderly, appealing to him with an air of +triumph, and asking the old man whether she did not always say that her +brother had a good heart? + +Indeed, Joseph Sedley, affected by the humble position in which he +found his relations, and in the expansiveness and overflowing of heart +occasioned by the first meeting, declared that they should never suffer +want or discomfort any more, that he was at home for some time at any +rate, during which his house and everything he had should be theirs: +and that Amelia would look very pretty at the head of his table--until +she would accept one of her own. + +She shook her head sadly and had, as usual, recourse to the waterworks. +She knew what he meant. She and her young confidante, Miss Mary, had +talked over the matter most fully, the very night of the Major's visit, +beyond which time the impetuous Polly could not refrain from talking of +the discovery which she had made, and describing the start and tremor +of joy by which Major Dobbin betrayed himself when Mr. Binny passed +with his bride and the Major learned that he had no longer a rival to +fear. "Didn't you see how he shook all over when you asked if he was +married and he said, 'Who told you those lies?' Oh, M'am," Polly said, +"he never kept his eyes off you, and I'm sure he's grown grey athinking +of you." + +But Amelia, looking up at her bed, over which hung the portraits of her +husband and son, told her young protegee never, never, to speak on that +subject again; that Major Dobbin had been her husband's dearest friend +and her own and George's most kind and affectionate guardian; that she +loved him as a brother--but that a woman who had been married to such +an angel as that, and she pointed to the wall, could never think of any +other union. Poor Polly sighed: she thought what she should do if +young Mr. Tomkins, at the surgery, who always looked at her so at +church, and who, by those mere aggressive glances had put her timorous +little heart into such a flutter that she was ready to surrender at +once,--what she should do if he were to die? She knew he was +consumptive, his cheeks were so red and he was so uncommon thin in the +waist. + +Not that Emmy, being made aware of the honest Major's passion, rebuffed +him in any way, or felt displeased with him. Such an attachment from +so true and loyal a gentleman could make no woman angry. Desdemona was +not angry with Cassio, though there is very little doubt she saw the +Lieutenant's partiality for her (and I for my part believe that many +more things took place in that sad affair than the worthy Moorish +officer ever knew of); why, Miranda was even very kind to Caliban, and +we may be pretty sure for the same reason. Not that she would encourage +him in the least--the poor uncouth monster--of course not. No more +would Emmy by any means encourage her admirer, the Major. She would +give him that friendly regard, which so much excellence and fidelity +merited; she would treat him with perfect cordiality and frankness +until he made his proposals, and THEN it would be time enough for her +to speak and to put an end to hopes which never could be realized. + +She slept, therefore, very soundly that evening, after the conversation +with Miss Polly, and was more than ordinarily happy, in spite of Jos's +delaying. "I am glad he is not going to marry that Miss O'Dowd," she +thought. "Colonel O'Dowd never could have a sister fit for such an +accomplished man as Major William." Who was there amongst her little +circle who would make him a good wife? Not Miss Binny, she was too old +and ill-tempered; Miss Osborne? too old too. Little Polly was too +young. Mrs. Osborne could not find anybody to suit the Major before she +went to sleep. + +The same morning brought Major Dobbin a letter to the Slaughters' +Coffee-house from his friend at Southampton, begging dear Dob to excuse +Jos for being in a rage when awakened the day before (he had a +confounded headache, and was just in his first sleep), and entreating +Dob to engage comfortable rooms at the Slaughters' for Mr. Sedley and +his servants. The Major had become necessary to Jos during the voyage. +He was attached to him, and hung upon him. The other passengers were +away to London. Young Ricketts and little Chaffers went away on the +coach that day--Ricketts on the box, and taking the reins from Botley; +the Doctor was off to his family at Portsea; Bragg gone to town to his +co-partners; and the first mate busy in the unloading of the +Ramchunder. Mr. Joe was very lonely at Southampton, and got the +landlord of the George to take a glass of wine with him that day, at +the very hour at which Major Dobbin was seated at the table of his +father, Sir William, where his sister found out (for it was impossible +for the Major to tell fibs) that he had been to see Mrs. George Osborne. + +Jos was so comfortably situated in St. Martin's Lane, he could enjoy +his hookah there with such perfect ease, and could swagger down to the +theatres, when minded, so agreeably, that, perhaps, he would have +remained altogether at the Slaughters' had not his friend, the Major, +been at his elbow. That gentleman would not let the Bengalee rest +until he had executed his promise of having a home for Amelia and his +father. Jos was a soft fellow in anybody's hands, Dobbin most active +in anybody's concerns but his own; the civilian was, therefore, an easy +victim to the guileless arts of this good-natured diplomatist and was +ready to do, to purchase, hire, or relinquish whatever his friend +thought fit. Loll Jewab, of whom the boys about St. Martin's Lane +used to make cruel fun whenever he showed his dusky countenance in the +street, was sent back to Calcutta in the Lady Kicklebury East Indiaman, +in which Sir William Dobbin had a share, having previously taught Jos's +European the art of preparing curries, pilaus, and pipes. It was a +matter of great delight and occupation to Jos to superintend the +building of a smart chariot which he and the Major ordered in the +neighbouring Long Acre: and a pair of handsome horses were jobbed, +with which Jos drove about in state in the park, or to call upon his +Indian friends. Amelia was not seldom by his side on these excursions, +when also Major Dobbin would be seen in the back seat of the carriage. +At other times old Sedley and his daughter took advantage of it, and +Miss Clapp, who frequently accompanied her friend, had great pleasure +in being recognized as she sat in the carriage, dressed in the famous +yellow shawl, by the young gentleman at the surgery, whose face might +commonly be seen over the window-blinds as she passed. + +Shortly after Jos's first appearance at Brompton, a dismal scene, +indeed, took place at that humble cottage at which the Sedleys had +passed the last ten years of their life. Jos's carriage (the temporary +one, not the chariot under construction) arrived one day and carried +off old Sedley and his daughter--to return no more. The tears that +were shed by the landlady and the landlady's daughter at that event +were as genuine tears of sorrow as any that have been outpoured in the +course of this history. In their long acquaintanceship and intimacy +they could not recall a harsh word that had been uttered by Amelia. She +had been all sweetness and kindness, always thankful, always gentle, +even when Mrs. Clapp lost her own temper and pressed for the rent. +When the kind creature was going away for good and all, the landlady +reproached herself bitterly for ever having used a rough expression to +her--how she wept, as they stuck up with wafers on the window, a paper +notifying that the little rooms so long occupied were to let! They +never would have such lodgers again, that was quite clear. After-life +proved the truth of this melancholy prophecy, and Mrs. Clapp revenged +herself for the deterioration of mankind by levying the most savage +contributions upon the tea-caddies and legs of mutton of her +locataires. Most of them scolded and grumbled; some of them did not +pay; none of them stayed. The landlady might well regret those old, old +friends, who had left her. + +As for Miss Mary, her sorrow at Amelia's departure was such as I shall +not attempt to depict. From childhood upwards she had been with her +daily and had attached herself so passionately to that dear good lady +that when the grand barouche came to carry her off into splendour, she +fainted in the arms of her friend, who was indeed scarcely less +affected than the good-natured girl. Amelia loved her like a daughter. +During eleven years the girl had been her constant friend and +associate. The separation was a very painful one indeed to her. But +it was of course arranged that Mary was to come and stay often at the +grand new house whither Mrs. Osborne was going, and where Mary was sure +she would never be so happy as she had been in their humble cot, as +Miss Clapp called it, in the language of the novels which she loved. + +Let us hope she was wrong in her judgement. Poor Emmy's days of +happiness had been very few in that humble cot. A gloomy Fate had +oppressed her there. She never liked to come back to the house after +she had left it, or to face the landlady who had tyrannized over her +when ill-humoured and unpaid, or when pleased had treated her with a +coarse familiarity scarcely less odious. Her servility and fulsome +compliments when Emmy was in prosperity were not more to that lady's +liking. She cast about notes of admiration all over the new house, +extolling every article of furniture or ornament; she fingered Mrs. +Osborne's dresses and calculated their price. Nothing could be too good +for that sweet lady, she vowed and protested. But in the vulgar +sycophant who now paid court to her, Emmy always remembered the coarse +tyrant who had made her miserable many a time, to whom she had been +forced to put up petitions for time, when the rent was overdue; who +cried out at her extravagance if she bought delicacies for her ailing +mother or father; who had seen her humble and trampled upon her. + +Nobody ever heard of these griefs, which had been part of our poor +little woman's lot in life. She kept them secret from her father, +whose improvidence was the cause of much of her misery. She had to +bear all the blame of his misdoings, and indeed was so utterly gentle +and humble as to be made by nature for a victim. + +I hope she is not to suffer much more of that hard usage. And, as in +all griefs there is said to be some consolation, I may mention that +poor Mary, when left at her friend's departure in a hysterical +condition, was placed under the medical treatment of the young fellow +from the surgery, under whose care she rallied after a short period. +Emmy, when she went away from Brompton, endowed Mary with every article +of furniture that the house contained, only taking away her pictures +(the two pictures over the bed) and her piano--that little old piano +which had now passed into a plaintive jingling old age, but which she +loved for reasons of her own. She was a child when first she played on +it, and her parents gave it her. It had been given to her again since, +as the reader may remember, when her father's house was gone to ruin +and the instrument was recovered out of the wreck. + +Major Dobbin was exceedingly pleased when, as he was superintending the +arrangements of Jos's new house--which the Major insisted should be +very handsome and comfortable--the cart arrived from Brompton, bringing +the trunks and bandboxes of the emigrants from that village, and with +them the old piano. Amelia would have it up in her sitting-room, a +neat little apartment on the second floor, adjoining her father's +chamber, and where the old gentleman sat commonly of evenings. + +When the men appeared then bearing this old music-box, and Amelia gave +orders that it should be placed in the chamber aforesaid, Dobbin was +quite elated. "I'm glad you've kept it," he said in a very sentimental +manner. "I was afraid you didn't care about it." + +"I value it more than anything I have in the world," said Amelia. + +"Do you, Amelia?" cried the Major. The fact was, as he had bought it +himself, though he never said anything about it, it never entered into +his head to suppose that Emmy should think anybody else was the +purchaser, and as a matter of course he fancied that she knew the gift +came from him. "Do you, Amelia?" he said; and the question, the great +question of all, was trembling on his lips, when Emmy replied-- + +"Can I do otherwise?--did not he give it me?" + +"I did not know," said poor old Dob, and his countenance fell. + +Emmy did not note the circumstance at the time, nor take immediate heed +of the very dismal expression which honest Dobbin's countenance +assumed, but she thought of it afterwards. And then it struck her, +with inexpressible pain and mortification too, that it was William who +was the giver of the piano, and not George, as she had fancied. It was +not George's gift; the only one which she had received from her lover, +as she thought--the thing she had cherished beyond all others--her +dearest relic and prize. She had spoken to it about George; played his +favourite airs upon it; sat for long evening hours, touching, to the +best of her simple art, melancholy harmonies on the keys, and weeping +over them in silence. It was not George's relic. It was valueless now. +The next time that old Sedley asked her to play, she said it was +shockingly out of tune, that she had a headache, that she couldn't play. + +Then, according to her custom, she rebuked herself for her pettishness +and ingratitude and determined to make a reparation to honest William +for the slight she had not expressed to him, but had felt for his +piano. A few days afterwards, as they were seated in the drawing-room, +where Jos had fallen asleep with great comfort after dinner, Amelia +said with rather a faltering voice to Major Dobbin-- + +"I have to beg your pardon for something." + +"About what?" said he. + +"About--about that little square piano. I never thanked you for it +when you gave it me, many, many years ago, before I was married. I +thought somebody else had given it. Thank you, William." She held out +her hand, but the poor little woman's heart was bleeding; and as for +her eyes, of course they were at their work. + +But William could hold no more. "Amelia, Amelia," he said, "I did buy +it for you. I loved you then as I do now. I must tell you. I think I +loved you from the first minute that I saw you, when George brought me +to your house, to show me the Amelia whom he was engaged to. You were +but a girl, in white, with large ringlets; you came down singing--do +you remember?--and we went to Vauxhall. Since then I have thought of +but one woman in the world, and that was you. I think there is no hour +in the day has passed for twelve years that I haven't thought of you. +I came to tell you this before I went to India, but you did not care, +and I hadn't the heart to speak. You did not care whether I stayed or +went." + +"I was very ungrateful," Amelia said. + +"No, only indifferent," Dobbin continued desperately. "I have nothing +to make a woman to be otherwise. I know what you are feeling now. You +are hurt in your heart at the discovery about the piano, and that it +came from me and not from George. I forgot, or I should never have +spoken of it so. It is for me to ask your pardon for being a fool for +a moment, and thinking that years of constancy and devotion might have +pleaded with you." + +"It is you who are cruel now," Amelia said with some spirit. "George is +my husband, here and in heaven. How could I love any other but him? I +am his now as when you first saw me, dear William. It was he who told +me how good and generous you were, and who taught me to love you as a +brother. Have you not been everything to me and my boy? Our dearest, +truest, kindest friend and protector? Had you come a few months sooner +perhaps you might have spared me that--that dreadful parting. Oh, it +nearly killed me, William--but you didn't come, though I wished and +prayed for you to come, and they took him too away from me. Isn't he a +noble boy, William? Be his friend still and mine"--and here her voice +broke, and she hid her face on his shoulder. + +The Major folded his arms round her, holding her to him as if she was a +child, and kissed her head. "I will not change, dear Amelia," he said. +"I ask for no more than your love. I think I would not have it +otherwise. Only let me stay near you and see you often." + +"Yes, often," Amelia said. And so William was at liberty to look and +long--as the poor boy at school who has no money may sigh after the +contents of the tart-woman's tray. + + + +CHAPTER LX + +Returns to the Genteel World + +Good fortune now begins to smile upon Amelia. We are glad to get her +out of that low sphere in which she has been creeping hitherto and +introduce her into a polite circle--not so grand and refined as that in +which our other female friend, Mrs. Becky, has appeared, but still +having no small pretensions to gentility and fashion. Jos's friends +were all from the three presidencies, and his new house was in the +comfortable Anglo-Indian district of which Moira Place is the centre. +Minto Square, Great Clive Street, Warren Street, Hastings Street, +Ochterlony Place, Plassy Square, Assaye Terrace ("gardens" was a +felicitous word not applied to stucco houses with asphalt terraces in +front, so early as 1827)--who does not know these respectable abodes of +the retired Indian aristocracy, and the quarter which Mr. Wenham calls +the Black Hole, in a word? Jos's position in life was not grand enough +to entitle him to a house in Moira Place, where none can live but +retired Members of Council, and partners of Indian firms (who break, +after having settled a hundred thousand pounds on their wives, and +retire into comparative penury to a country place and four thousand a +year); he engaged a comfortable house of a second- or third-rate order +in Gillespie Street, purchasing the carpets, costly mirrors, and +handsome and appropriate planned furniture by Seddons from the +assignees of Mr. Scape, lately admitted partner into the great Calcutta +House of Fogle, Fake, and Cracksman, in which poor Scape had embarked +seventy thousand pounds, the earnings of a long and honourable life, +taking Fake's place, who retired to a princely park in Sussex (the +Fogles have been long out of the firm, and Sir Horace Fogle is about to +be raised to the peerage as Baron Bandanna)--admitted, I say, partner +into the great agency house of Fogle and Fake two years before it +failed for a million and plunged half the Indian public into misery and +ruin. + +Scape, ruined, honest, and broken-hearted at sixty-five years of age, +went out to Calcutta to wind up the affairs of the house. Walter Scape +was withdrawn from Eton and put into a merchant's house. Florence +Scape, Fanny Scape, and their mother faded away to Boulogne, and will +be heard of no more. To be brief, Jos stepped in and bought their +carpets and sideboards and admired himself in the mirrors which had +reflected their kind handsome faces. The Scape tradesmen, all +honourably paid, left their cards, and were eager to supply the new +household. The large men in white waistcoats who waited at Scape's +dinners, greengrocers, bank-porters, and milkmen in their private +capacity, left their addresses and ingratiated themselves with the +butler. Mr. Chummy, the chimney-purifier, who had swept the last three +families, tried to coax the butler and the boy under him, whose duty it +was to go out covered with buttons and with stripes down his trousers, +for the protection of Mrs. Amelia whenever she chose to walk abroad. + +It was a modest establishment. The butler was Jos's valet also, and +never was more drunk than a butler in a small family should be who has +a proper regard for his master's wine. Emmy was supplied with a maid, +grown on Sir William Dobbin's suburban estate; a good girl, whose +kindness and humility disarmed Mrs. Osborne, who was at first terrified +at the idea of having a servant to wait upon herself, who did not in +the least know how to use one, and who always spoke to domestics with +the most reverential politeness. But this maid was very useful in the +family, in dexterously tending old Mr. Sedley, who kept almost entirely +to his own quarter of the house and never mixed in any of the gay +doings which took place there. + +Numbers of people came to see Mrs. Osborne. Lady Dobbin and daughters +were delighted at her change of fortune, and waited upon her. Miss +Osborne from Russell Square came in her grand chariot with the flaming +hammer-cloth emblazoned with the Leeds arms. Jos was reported to be +immensely rich. Old Osborne had no objection that Georgy should +inherit his uncle's property as well as his own. "Damn it, we will make +a man of the feller," he said; "and I'll see him in Parliament before I +die. You may go and see his mother, Miss O., though I'll never set +eyes on her": and Miss Osborne came. Emmy, you may be sure, was very +glad to see her, and so be brought nearer to George. That young fellow +was allowed to come much more frequently than before to visit his +mother. He dined once or twice a week in Gillespie Street and bullied +the servants and his relations there, just as he did in Russell Square. + +He was always respectful to Major Dobbin, however, and more modest in +his demeanour when that gentleman was present. He was a clever lad and +afraid of the Major. George could not help admiring his friend's +simplicity, his good humour, his various learning quietly imparted, his +general love of truth and justice. He had met no such man as yet in +the course of his experience, and he had an instinctive liking for a +gentleman. He hung fondly by his godfather's side, and it was his +delight to walk in the parks and hear Dobbin talk. William told George +about his father, about India and Waterloo, about everything but +himself. When George was more than usually pert and conceited, the +Major made jokes at him, which Mrs. Osborne thought very cruel. One +day, taking him to the play, and the boy declining to go into the pit +because it was vulgar, the Major took him to the boxes, left him there, +and went down himself to the pit. He had not been seated there very +long before he felt an arm thrust under his and a dandy little hand in +a kid glove squeezing his arm. George had seen the absurdity of his +ways and come down from the upper region. A tender laugh of +benevolence lighted up old Dobbin's face and eyes as he looked at the +repentant little prodigal. He loved the boy, as he did everything that +belonged to Amelia. How charmed she was when she heard of this +instance of George's goodness! Her eyes looked more kindly on Dobbin +than they ever had done. She blushed, he thought, after looking at him +so. + +Georgy never tired of his praises of the Major to his mother. "I like +him, Mamma, because he knows such lots of things; and he ain't like old +Veal, who is always bragging and using such long words, don't you know? +The chaps call him 'Longtail' at school. I gave him the name; ain't it +capital? But Dob reads Latin like English, and French and that; and +when we go out together he tells me stories about my Papa, and never +about himself; though I heard Colonel Buckler, at Grandpapa's, say that +he was one of the bravest officers in the army, and had distinguished +himself ever so much. Grandpapa was quite surprised, and said, 'THAT +feller! Why, I didn't think he could say Bo to a goose'--but I know he +could, couldn't he, Mamma?" + +Emmy laughed: she thought it was very likely the Major could do thus +much. + +If there was a sincere liking between George and the Major, it must be +confessed that between the boy and his uncle no great love existed. +George had got a way of blowing out his cheeks, and putting his hands +in his waistcoat pockets, and saying, "God bless my soul, you don't say +so," so exactly after the fashion of old Jos that it was impossible to +refrain from laughter. The servants would explode at dinner if the +lad, asking for something which wasn't at table, put on that +countenance and used that favourite phrase. Even Dobbin would shoot +out a sudden peal at the boy's mimicry. If George did not mimic his +uncle to his face, it was only by Dobbin's rebukes and Amelia's +terrified entreaties that the little scapegrace was induced to desist. +And the worthy civilian being haunted by a dim consciousness that the +lad thought him an ass, and was inclined to turn him into ridicule, +used to be extremely timorous and, of course, doubly pompous and +dignified in the presence of Master Georgy. When it was announced that +the young gentleman was expected in Gillespie Street to dine with his +mother, Mr. Jos commonly found that he had an engagement at the Club. +Perhaps nobody was much grieved at his absence. On those days Mr. +Sedley would commonly be induced to come out from his place of refuge +in the upper stories, and there would be a small family party, whereof +Major Dobbin pretty generally formed one. He was the ami de la +maison--old Sedley's friend, Emmy's friend, Georgy's friend, Jos's +counsel and adviser. "He might almost as well be at Madras for anything +WE see of him," Miss Ann Dobbin remarked at Camberwell. Ah! Miss Ann, +did it not strike you that it was not YOU whom the Major wanted to +marry? + +Joseph Sedley then led a life of dignified otiosity such as became a +person of his eminence. His very first point, of course, was to become +a member of the Oriental Club, where he spent his mornings in the +company of his brother Indians, where he dined, or whence he brought +home men to dine. + +Amelia had to receive and entertain these gentlemen and their ladies. +From these she heard how soon Smith would be in Council; how many lacs +Jones had brought home with him, how Thomson's House in London had +refused the bills drawn by Thomson, Kibobjee, and Co., the Bombay +House, and how it was thought the Calcutta House must go too; how very +imprudent, to say the least of it, Mrs. Brown's conduct (wife of Brown +of the Ahmednuggur Irregulars) had been with young Swankey of the Body +Guard, sitting up with him on deck until all hours, and losing +themselves as they were riding out at the Cape; how Mrs. Hardyman had +had out her thirteen sisters, daughters of a country curate, the Rev: +Felix Rabbits, and married eleven of them, seven high up in the +service; how Hornby was wild because his wife would stay in Europe, and +Trotter was appointed Collector at Ummerapoora. This and similar talk +took place at the grand dinners all round. They had the same +conversation; the same silver dishes; the same saddles of mutton, +boiled turkeys, and entrees. Politics set in a short time after +dessert, when the ladies retired upstairs and talked about their +complaints and their children. + +Mutato nomine, it is all the same. Don't the barristers' wives talk +about Circuit? Don't the soldiers' ladies gossip about the Regiment? +Don't the clergymen's ladies discourse about Sunday-schools and who +takes whose duty? Don't the very greatest ladies of all talk about that +small clique of persons to whom they belong? And why should our Indian +friends not have their own conversation?--only I admit it is slow for +the laymen whose fate it sometimes is to sit by and listen. + +Before long Emmy had a visiting-book, and was driving about regularly +in a carriage, calling upon Lady Bludyer (wife of Major-General Sir +Roger Bludyer, K.C.B., Bengal Army); Lady Huff, wife of Sir G. Huff, +Bombay ditto; Mrs. Pice, the Lady of Pice the Director, &c. We are not +long in using ourselves to changes in life. That carriage came round +to Gillespie Street every day; that buttony boy sprang up and down from +the box with Emmy's and Jos's visiting-cards; at stated hours Emmy and +the carriage went for Jos to the Club and took him an airing; or, +putting old Sedley into the vehicle, she drove the old man round the +Regent's Park. The lady's maid and the chariot, the visiting-book and +the buttony page, became soon as familiar to Amelia as the humble +routine of Brompton. She accommodated herself to one as to the other. +If Fate had ordained that she should be a Duchess, she would even have +done that duty too. She was voted, in Jos's female society, rather a +pleasing young person--not much in her, but pleasing, and that sort of +thing. + +The men, as usual, liked her artless kindness and simple refined +demeanour. The gallant young Indian dandies at home on furlough--immense +dandies these--chained and moustached--driving in tearing cabs, +the pillars of the theatres, living at West End hotels--nevertheless +admired Mrs. Osborne, liked to bow to her carriage in the park, and to +be admitted to have the honour of paying her a morning visit. Swankey +of the Body Guard himself, that dangerous youth, and the greatest buck +of all the Indian army now on leave, was one day discovered by Major +Dobbin tete-a-tete with Amelia, and describing the sport of +pig-sticking to her with great humour and eloquence; and he spoke +afterwards of a d--d king's officer that's always hanging about the +house--a long, thin, queer-looking, oldish fellow--a dry fellow though, +that took the shine out of a man in the talking line. + +Had the Major possessed a little more personal vanity he would have +been jealous of so dangerous a young buck as that fascinating Bengal +Captain. But Dobbin was of too simple and generous a nature to have +any doubts about Amelia. He was glad that the young men should pay her +respect, and that others should admire her. Ever since her womanhood +almost, had she not been persecuted and undervalued? It pleased him to +see how kindness bought out her good qualities and how her spirits +gently rose with her prosperity. Any person who appreciated her paid a +compliment to the Major's good judgement--that is, if a man may be +said to have good judgement who is under the influence of Love's +delusion. + +After Jos went to Court, which we may be sure he did as a loyal subject +of his Sovereign (showing himself in his full court suit at the Club, +whither Dobbin came to fetch him in a very shabby old uniform) he who +had always been a staunch Loyalist and admirer of George IV, became +such a tremendous Tory and pillar of the State that he was for having +Amelia to go to a Drawing-room, too. He somehow had worked himself up +to believe that he was implicated in the maintenance of the public +welfare and that the Sovereign would not be happy unless Jos Sedley and +his family appeared to rally round him at St. James's. + +Emmy laughed. "Shall I wear the family diamonds, Jos?" she said. + +"I wish you would let me buy you some," thought the Major. "I should +like to see any that were too good for you." + + + +CHAPTER LXI + +In Which Two Lights are Put Out + +There came a day when the round of decorous pleasures and solemn +gaieties in which Mr. Jos Sedley's family indulged was interrupted by +an event which happens in most houses. As you ascend the staircase of +your house from the drawing towards the bedroom floors, you may have +remarked a little arch in the wall right before you, which at once +gives light to the stair which leads from the second story to the third +(where the nursery and servants' chambers commonly are) and serves for +another purpose of utility, of which the undertaker's men can give you +a notion. They rest the coffins upon that arch, or pass them through +it so as not to disturb in any unseemly manner the cold tenant +slumbering within the black ark. + +That second-floor arch in a London house, looking up and down the well +of the staircase and commanding the main thoroughfare by which the +inhabitants are passing; by which cook lurks down before daylight to +scour her pots and pans in the kitchen; by which young master +stealthily ascends, having left his boots in the hall, and let himself +in after dawn from a jolly night at the Club; down which miss comes +rustling in fresh ribbons and spreading muslins, brilliant and +beautiful, and prepared for conquest and the ball; or Master Tommy +slides, preferring the banisters for a mode of conveyance, and +disdaining danger and the stair; down which the mother is fondly +carried smiling in her strong husband's arms, as he steps steadily step +by step, and followed by the monthly nurse, on the day when the medical +man has pronounced that the charming patient may go downstairs; up +which John lurks to bed, yawning, with a sputtering tallow candle, and +to gather up before sunrise the boots which are awaiting him in the +passages--that stair, up or down which babies are carried, old people +are helped, guests are marshalled to the ball, the parson walks to the +christening, the doctor to the sick-room, and the undertaker's men to +the upper floor--what a memento of Life, Death, and Vanity it is--that +arch and stair--if you choose to consider it, and sit on the landing, +looking up and down the well! The doctor will come up to us too for +the last time there, my friend in motley. The nurse will look in at +the curtains, and you take no notice--and then she will fling open the +windows for a little and let in the air. Then they will pull down all +the front blinds of the house and live in the back rooms--then they +will send for the lawyer and other men in black, &c. Your comedy and +mine will have been played then, and we shall be removed, oh, how far, +from the trumpets, and the shouting, and the posture-making. If we +are gentlefolks they will put hatchments over our late domicile, with +gilt cherubim, and mottoes stating that there is "Quiet in Heaven." +Your son will new furnish the house, or perhaps let it, and go into a +more modern quarter; your name will be among the "Members Deceased" in +the lists of your clubs next year. However much you may be mourned, +your widow will like to have her weeds neatly made--the cook will send +or come up to ask about dinner--the survivor will soon bear to look at +your picture over the mantelpiece, which will presently be deposed from +the place of honour, to make way for the portrait of the son who reigns. + +Which of the dead are most tenderly and passionately deplored? Those +who love the survivors the least, I believe. The death of a child +occasions a passion of grief and frantic tears, such as your end, +brother reader, will never inspire. The death of an infant which +scarce knew you, which a week's absence from you would have caused to +forget you, will strike you down more than the loss of your closest +friend, or your first-born son--a man grown like yourself, with +children of his own. We may be harsh and stern with Judah and +Simeon--our love and pity gush out for Benjamin, the little one. And if +you are old, as some reader of this may be or shall be old and rich, or +old and poor--you may one day be thinking for yourself--"These people +are very good round about me, but they won't grieve too much when I am +gone. I am very rich, and they want my inheritance--or very poor, and +they are tired of supporting me." + +The period of mourning for Mrs. Sedley's death was only just concluded, +and Jos scarcely had had time to cast off his black and appear in the +splendid waistcoats which he loved, when it became evident to those +about Mr. Sedley that another event was at hand, and that the old man +was about to go seek for his wife in the dark land whither she had +preceded him. "The state of my father's health," Jos Sedley solemnly +remarked at the Club, "prevents me from giving any LARGE parties this +season: but if you will come in quietly at half-past six, Chutney, my +boy, and fake a homely dinner with one or two of the old set--I shall +be always glad to see you." So Jos and his acquaintances dined and +drank their claret among themselves in silence, whilst the sands of +life were running out in the old man's glass upstairs. The +velvet-footed butler brought them their wine, and they composed +themselves to a rubber after dinner, at which Major Dobbin would +sometimes come and take a hand; and Mrs. Osborne would occasionally +descend, when her patient above was settled for the night, and had +commenced one of those lightly troubled slumbers which visit the pillow +of old age. + +The old man clung to his daughter during this sickness. He would take +his broths and medicines from scarcely any other hand. To tend him +became almost the sole business of her life. Her bed was placed close +by the door which opened into his chamber, and she was alive at the +slightest noise or disturbance from the couch of the querulous invalid. +Though, to do him justice, he lay awake many an hour, silent and +without stirring, unwilling to awaken his kind and vigilant nurse. + +He loved his daughter with more fondness now, perhaps, than ever he had +done since the days of her childhood. In the discharge of gentle +offices and kind filial duties, this simple creature shone most +especially. "She walks into the room as silently as a sunbeam," Mr. +Dobbin thought as he saw her passing in and out from her father's room, +a cheerful sweetness lighting up her face as she moved to and fro, +graceful and noiseless. When women are brooding over their children, +or busied in a sick-room, who has not seen in their faces those sweet +angelic beams of love and pity? + +A secret feud of some years' standing was thus healed, and with a tacit +reconciliation. In these last hours, and touched by her love and +goodness, the old man forgot all his grief against her, and wrongs +which he and his wife had many a long night debated: how she had given +up everything for her boy; how she was careless of her parents in their +old age and misfortune, and only thought of the child; how absurdly and +foolishly, impiously indeed, she took on when George was removed from +her. Old Sedley forgot these charges as he was making up his last +account, and did justice to the gentle and uncomplaining little martyr. +One night when she stole into his room, she found him awake, when the +broken old man made his confession. "Oh, Emmy, I've been thinking we +were very unkind and unjust to you," he said and put out his cold and +feeble hand to her. She knelt down and prayed by his bedside, as he did +too, having still hold of her hand. When our turn comes, friend, may +we have such company in our prayers! + +Perhaps as he was lying awake then, his life may have passed before +him--his early hopeful struggles, his manly successes and prosperity, +his downfall in his declining years, and his present helpless +condition--no chance of revenge against Fortune, which had had the +better of him--neither name nor money to bequeath--a spent-out, +bootless life of defeat and disappointment, and the end here! Which, I +wonder, brother reader, is the better lot, to die prosperous and +famous, or poor and disappointed? To have, and to be forced to yield; +or to sink out of life, having played and lost the game? That must be a +strange feeling, when a day of our life comes and we say, "To-morrow, +success or failure won't matter much, and the sun will rise, and all +the myriads of mankind go to their work or their pleasure as usual, but +I shall be out of the turmoil." + +So there came one morning and sunrise when all the world got up and set +about its various works and pleasures, with the exception of old John +Sedley, who was not to fight with fortune, or to hope or scheme any +more, but to go and take up a quiet and utterly unknown residence in a +churchyard at Brompton by the side of his old wife. + +Major Dobbin, Jos, and Georgy followed his remains to the grave, in a +black cloth coach. Jos came on purpose from the Star and Garter at +Richmond, whither he retreated after the deplorable event. He did not +care to remain in the house, with the--under the circumstances, you +understand. But Emmy stayed and did her duty as usual. She was bowed +down by no especial grief, and rather solemn than sorrowful. She +prayed that her own end might be as calm and painless, and thought with +trust and reverence of the words which she had heard from her father +during his illness, indicative of his faith, his resignation, and his +future hope. + +Yes, I think that will be the better ending of the two, after all. +Suppose you are particularly rich and well-to-do and say on that last +day, "I am very rich; I am tolerably well known; I have lived all my +life in the best society, and thank Heaven, come of a most respectable +family. I have served my King and country with honour. I was in +Parliament for several years, where, I may say, my speeches were +listened to and pretty well received. I don't owe any man a shilling: +on the contrary, I lent my old college friend, Jack Lazarus, fifty +pounds, for which my executors will not press him. I leave my +daughters with ten thousand pounds apiece--very good portions for +girls; I bequeath my plate and furniture, my house in Baker Street, +with a handsome jointure, to my widow for her life; and my landed +property, besides money in the funds, and my cellar of well-selected +wine in Baker Street, to my son. I leave twenty pound a year to my +valet; and I defy any man after I have gone to find anything against my +character." Or suppose, on the other hand, your swan sings quite a +different sort of dirge and you say, "I am a poor blighted, +disappointed old fellow, and have made an utter failure through life. +I was not endowed either with brains or with good fortune, and confess +that I have committed a hundred mistakes and blunders. I own to having +forgotten my duty many a time. I can't pay what I owe. On my last bed +I lie utterly helpless and humble, and I pray forgiveness for my +weakness and throw myself, with a contrite heart, at the feet of the +Divine Mercy." Which of these two speeches, think you, would be the +best oration for your own funeral? Old Sedley made the last; and in +that humble frame of mind, and holding by the hand of his daughter, +life and disappointment and vanity sank away from under him. + +"You see," said old Osborne to George, "what comes of merit, and +industry, and judicious speculations, and that. Look at me and my +banker's account. Look at your poor Grandfather Sedley and his +failure. And yet he was a better man than I was, this day twenty +years--a better man, I should say, by ten thousand pound." + +Beyond these people and Mr. Clapp's family, who came over from Brompton +to pay a visit of condolence, not a single soul alive ever cared a +penny piece about old John Sedley, or remembered the existence of such +a person. + +When old Osborne first heard from his friend Colonel Buckler (as little +Georgy had already informed us) how distinguished an officer Major +Dobbin was, he exhibited a great deal of scornful incredulity and +expressed his surprise how ever such a feller as that should possess +either brains or reputation. But he heard of the Major's fame from +various members of his society. Sir William Dobbin had a great opinion +of his son and narrated many stories illustrative of the Major's +learning, valour, and estimation in the world's opinion. Finally, his +name appeared in the lists of one or two great parties of the nobility, +and this circumstance had a prodigious effect upon the old aristocrat +of Russell Square. + +The Major's position, as guardian to Georgy, whose possession had been +ceded to his grandfather, rendered some meetings between the two +gentlemen inevitable; and it was in one of these that old Osborne, a +keen man of business, looking into the Major's accounts with his ward +and the boy's mother, got a hint, which staggered him very much, and at +once pained and pleased him, that it was out of William Dobbin's own +pocket that a part of the fund had been supplied upon which the poor +widow and the child had subsisted. + +When pressed upon the point, Dobbin, who could not tell lies, blushed +and stammered a good deal and finally confessed. "The marriage," he +said (at which his interlocutor's face grew dark) "was very much my +doing. I thought my poor friend had gone so far that retreat from his +engagement would have been dishonour to him and death to Mrs. Osborne, +and I could do no less, when she was left without resources, than give +what money I could spare to maintain her." + +"Major D.," Mr. Osborne said, looking hard at him and turning very red +too--"you did me a great injury; but give me leave to tell you, sir, +you are an honest feller. There's my hand, sir, though I little thought +that my flesh and blood was living on you--" and the pair shook hands, +with great confusion on Major Dobbin's part, thus found out in his act +of charitable hypocrisy. + +He strove to soften the old man and reconcile him towards his son's +memory. "He was such a noble fellow," he said, "that all of us loved +him, and would have done anything for him. I, as a young man in those +days, was flattered beyond measure by his preference for me, and was +more pleased to be seen in his company than in that of the +Commander-in-Chief. I never saw his equal for pluck and daring and all +the qualities of a soldier"; and Dobbin told the old father as many +stories as he could remember regarding the gallantry and achievements +of his son. "And Georgy is so like him," the Major added. + +"He's so like him that he makes me tremble sometimes," the grandfather +said. + +On one or two evenings the Major came to dine with Mr. Osborne (it was +during the time of the sickness of Mr. Sedley), and as the two sat +together in the evening after dinner, all their talk was about the +departed hero. The father boasted about him according to his wont, +glorifying himself in recounting his son's feats and gallantry, but his +mood was at any rate better and more charitable than that in which he +had been disposed until now to regard the poor fellow; and the +Christian heart of the kind Major was pleased at these symptoms of +returning peace and good-will. On the second evening old Osborne +called Dobbin William, just as he used to do at the time when Dobbin +and George were boys together, and the honest gentleman was pleased by +that mark of reconciliation. + +On the next day at breakfast, when Miss Osborne, with the asperity of +her age and character, ventured to make some remark reflecting +slightingly upon the Major's appearance or behaviour--the master of the +house interrupted her. "You'd have been glad enough to git him for +yourself, Miss O. But them grapes are sour. Ha! ha! Major William is +a fine feller." + +"That he is, Grandpapa," said Georgy approvingly; and going up close to +the old gentleman, he took a hold of his large grey whiskers, and +laughed in his face good-humouredly, and kissed him. And he told the +story at night to his mother, who fully agreed with the boy. "Indeed he +is," she said. "Your dear father always said so. He is one of the best +and most upright of men." Dobbin happened to drop in very soon after +this conversation, which made Amelia blush perhaps, and the young +scapegrace increased the confusion by telling Dobbin the other part of +the story. "I say, Dob," he said, "there's such an uncommon nice girl +wants to marry you. She's plenty of tin; she wears a front; and she +scolds the servants from morning till night." "Who is it?" asked +Dobbin. "It's Aunt O.," the boy answered. "Grandpapa said so. And I +say, Dob, how prime it would be to have you for my uncle." Old Sedley's +quavering voice from the next room at this moment weakly called for +Amelia, and the laughing ended. + +That old Osborne's mind was changing was pretty clear. He asked George +about his uncle sometimes, and laughed at the boy's imitation of the +way in which Jos said "God-bless-my-soul" and gobbled his soup. Then +he said, "It's not respectful, sir, of you younkers to be imitating of +your relations. Miss O., when you go out adriving to-day, leave my +card upon Mr. Sedley, do you hear? There's no quarrel betwigst me and +him anyhow." + +The card was returned, and Jos and the Major were asked to dinner--to +a dinner the most splendid and stupid that perhaps ever Mr. Osborne +gave; every inch of the family plate was exhibited, and the best +company was asked. Mr. Sedley took down Miss O. to dinner, and she +was very gracious to him; whereas she hardly spoke to the Major, who +sat apart from her, and by the side of Mr. Osborne, very timid. Jos +said, with great solemnity, it was the best turtle soup he had ever +tasted in his life, and asked Mr. Osborne where he got his Madeira. + +"It is some of Sedley's wine," whispered the butler to his master. +"I've had it a long time, and paid a good figure for it, too," Mr. +Osborne said aloud to his guest, and then whispered to his right-hand +neighbour how he had got it "at the old chap's sale." + +More than once he asked the Major about--about Mrs. George Osborne--a +theme on which the Major could be very eloquent when he chose. He told +Mr. Osborne of her sufferings--of her passionate attachment to her +husband, whose memory she worshipped still--of the tender and dutiful +manner in which she had supported her parents, and given up her boy, +when it seemed to her her duty to do so. "You don't know what she +endured, sir," said honest Dobbin with a tremor in his voice, "and I +hope and trust you will be reconciled to her. If she took your son +away from you, she gave hers to you; and however much you loved your +George, depend on it, she loved hers ten times more." + +"By God, you are a good feller, sir," was all Mr. Osborne said. It had +never struck him that the widow would feel any pain at parting from the +boy, or that his having a fine fortune could grieve her. A +reconciliation was announced as speedy and inevitable, and Amelia's +heart already began to beat at the notion of the awful meeting with +George's father. + +It was never, however, destined to take place. Old Sedley's lingering +illness and death supervened, after which a meeting was for some time +impossible. That catastrophe and other events may have worked upon Mr. +Osborne. He was much shaken of late, and aged, and his mind was +working inwardly. He had sent for his lawyers, and probably changed +something in his will. The medical man who looked in pronounced him +shaky, agitated, and talked of a little blood and the seaside; but he +took neither of these remedies. + +One day when he should have come down to breakfast, his servant missing +him, went into his dressing-room and found him lying at the foot of the +dressing-table in a fit. Miss Osborne was apprised; the doctors were +sent for; Georgy stopped away from school; the bleeders and cuppers +came. Osborne partially regained cognizance, but never could speak +again, though he tried dreadfully once or twice, and in four days he +died. The doctors went down, and the undertaker's men went up the +stairs, and all the shutters were shut towards the garden in Russell +Square. Bullock rushed from the City in a hurry. "How much money had +he left to that boy? Not half, surely? Surely share and share alike +between the three?" It was an agitating moment. + +What was it that poor old man tried once or twice in vain to say? I +hope it was that he wanted to see Amelia and be reconciled before he +left the world to one dear and faithful wife of his son: it was most +likely that, for his will showed that the hatred which he had so long +cherished had gone out of his heart. + +They found in the pocket of his dressing-gown the letter with the great +red seal which George had written him from Waterloo. He had looked at +the other papers too, relative to his son, for the key of the box in +which he kept them was also in his pocket, and it was found the seals +and envelopes had been broken--very likely on the night before the +seizure--when the butler had taken him tea into his study, and found +him reading in the great red family Bible. + +When the will was opened, it was found that half the property was left +to George, and the remainder between the two sisters. Mr. Bullock to +continue, for their joint benefit, the affairs of the commercial house, +or to go out, as he thought fit. An annuity of five hundred pounds, +chargeable on George's property, was left to his mother, "the widow of +my beloved son, George Osborne," who was to resume the guardianship of +the boy. + +"Major William Dobbin, my beloved son's friend," was appointed +executor; "and as out of his kindness and bounty, and with his own +private funds, he maintained my grandson and my son's widow, when they +were otherwise without means of support" (the testator went on to say) +"I hereby thank him heartily for his love and regard for them, and +beseech him to accept such a sum as may be sufficient to purchase his +commission as a Lieutenant-Colonel, or to be disposed of in any way he +may think fit." + +When Amelia heard that her father-in-law was reconciled to her, her +heart melted, and she was grateful for the fortune left to her. But +when she heard how Georgy was restored to her, and knew how and by +whom, and how it was William's bounty that supported her in poverty, +how it was William who gave her her husband and her son--oh, then she +sank on her knees, and prayed for blessings on that constant and kind +heart; she bowed down and humbled herself, and kissed the feet, as it +were, of that beautiful and generous affection. + +And gratitude was all that she had to pay back for such admirable +devotion and benefits--only gratitude! If she thought of any other +return, the image of George stood up out of the grave and said, "You +are mine, and mine only, now and forever." + +William knew her feelings: had he not passed his whole life in +divining them? + +When the nature of Mr. Osborne's will became known to the world, it was +edifying to remark how Mrs. George Osborne rose in the estimation of +the people forming her circle of acquaintance. The servants of Jos's +establishment, who used to question her humble orders and say they +would "ask Master" whether or not they could obey, never thought now of +that sort of appeal. The cook forgot to sneer at her shabby old gowns +(which, indeed, were quite eclipsed by that lady's finery when she was +dressed to go to church of a Sunday evening), the others no longer +grumbled at the sound of her bell, or delayed to answer that summons. +The coachman, who grumbled that his 'osses should be brought out and +his carriage made into an hospital for that old feller and Mrs. O., +drove her with the utmost alacrity now, and trembling lest he should be +superseded by Mr. Osborne's coachman, asked "what them there Russell +Square coachmen knew about town, and whether they was fit to sit on a +box before a lady?" Jos's friends, male and female, suddenly became +interested about Emmy, and cards of condolence multiplied on her hall +table. Jos himself, who had looked on her as a good-natured harmless +pauper, to whom it was his duty to give victuals and shelter, paid her +and the rich little boy, his nephew, the greatest respect--was anxious +that she should have change and amusement after her troubles and +trials, "poor dear girl"--and began to appear at the breakfast-table, +and most particularly to ask how she would like to dispose of the day. + +In her capacity of guardian to Georgy, she, with the consent of the +Major, her fellow-trustee, begged Miss Osborne to live in the Russell +Square house as long as ever she chose to dwell there; but that lady, +with thanks, declared that she never could think of remaining alone in +that melancholy mansion, and departed in deep mourning to Cheltenham, +with a couple of her old domestics. The rest were liberally paid and +dismissed, the faithful old butler, whom Mrs. Osborne proposed to +retain, resigning and preferring to invest his savings in a +public-house, where, let us hope, he was not unprosperous. Miss Osborne +not choosing to live in Russell Square, Mrs. Osborne also, after +consultation, declined to occupy the gloomy old mansion there. The +house was dismantled; the rich furniture and effects, the awful +chandeliers and dreary blank mirrors packed away and hidden, the rich +rosewood drawing-room suite was muffled in straw, the carpets were +rolled up and corded, the small select library of well-bound books was +stowed into two wine-chests, and the whole paraphernalia rolled away in +several enormous vans to the Pantechnicon, where they were to lie until +Georgy's majority. And the great heavy dark plate-chests went off to +Messrs. Stumpy and Rowdy, to lie in the cellars of those eminent +bankers until the same period should arrive. + +One day Emmy, with George in her hand and clad in deep sables, went to +visit the deserted mansion which she had not entered since she was a +girl. The place in front was littered with straw where the vans had +been laden and rolled off. They went into the great blank rooms, the +walls of which bore the marks where the pictures and mirrors had hung. +Then they went up the great blank stone staircases into the upper +rooms, into that where grandpapa died, as George said in a whisper, and +then higher still into George's own room. The boy was still clinging +by her side, but she thought of another besides him. She knew that it +had been his father's room as well as his own. + +She went up to one of the open windows (one of those at which she used +to gaze with a sick heart when the child was first taken from her), and +thence as she looked out she could see, over the trees of Russell +Square, the old house in which she herself was born, and where she had +passed so many happy days of sacred youth. They all came back to her, +the pleasant holidays, the kind faces, the careless, joyful past times, +and the long pains and trials that had since cast her down. She thought +of these and of the man who had been her constant protector, her good +genius, her sole benefactor, her tender and generous friend. + +"Look here, Mother," said Georgy, "here's a G.O. scratched on the glass +with a diamond, I never saw it before, I never did it." + +"It was your father's room long before you were born, George," she +said, and she blushed as she kissed the boy. + +She was very silent as they drove back to Richmond, where they had +taken a temporary house: where the smiling lawyers used to come +bustling over to see her (and we may be sure noted the visit in the +bill): and where of course there was a room for Major Dobbin too, who +rode over frequently, having much business to transact on behalf of his +little ward. + +Georgy at this time was removed from Mr. Veal's on an unlimited +holiday, and that gentleman was engaged to prepare an inscription for a +fine marble slab, to be placed up in the Foundling under the monument +of Captain George Osborne. + +The female Bullock, aunt of Georgy, although despoiled by that little +monster of one-half of the sum which she expected from her father, +nevertheless showed her charitableness of spirit by being reconciled to +the mother and the boy. Roehampton is not far from Richmond, and one +day the chariot, with the golden bullocks emblazoned on the panels, and +the flaccid children within, drove to Amelia's house at Richmond; and +the Bullock family made an irruption into the garden, where Amelia was +reading a book, Jos was in an arbour placidly dipping strawberries into +wine, and the Major in one of his Indian jackets was giving a back to +Georgy, who chose to jump over him. He went over his head and bounded +into the little advance of Bullocks, with immense black bows in their +hats, and huge black sashes, accompanying their mourning mamma. + +"He is just of the age for Rosa," the fond parent thought, and glanced +towards that dear child, an unwholesome little miss of seven years of +age. + +"Rosa, go and kiss your dear cousin," Mrs. Frederick said. "Don't you +know me, George? I am your aunt." + +"I know you well enough," George said; "but I don't like kissing, +please"; and he retreated from the obedient caresses of his cousin. + +"Take me to your dear mamma, you droll child," Mrs. Frederick said, and +those ladies accordingly met, after an absence of more than fifteen +years. During Emmy's cares and poverty the other had never once +thought about coming to see her, but now that she was decently +prosperous in the world, her sister-in-law came to her as a matter of +course. + +So did numbers more. Our old friend, Miss Swartz, and her husband came +thundering over from Hampton Court, with flaming yellow liveries, and +was as impetuously fond of Amelia as ever. Miss Swartz would have +liked her always if she could have seen her. One must do her that +justice. But, que voulez vous?--in this vast town one has not the time +to go and seek one's friends; if they drop out of the rank they +disappear, and we march on without them. Who is ever missed in Vanity +Fair? + +But so, in a word, and before the period of grief for Mr. Osborne's +death had subsided, Emmy found herself in the centre of a very genteel +circle indeed, the members of which could not conceive that anybody +belonging to it was not very lucky. There was scarce one of the ladies +that hadn't a relation a Peer, though the husband might be a drysalter +in the City. Some of the ladies were very blue and well informed, +reading Mrs. Somerville and frequenting the Royal Institution; others +were severe and Evangelical, and held by Exeter Hall. Emmy, it must be +owned, found herself entirely at a loss in the midst of their clavers, +and suffered woefully on the one or two occasions on which she was +compelled to accept Mrs. Frederick Bullock's hospitalities. That lady +persisted in patronizing her and determined most graciously to form +her. She found Amelia's milliners for her and regulated her household +and her manners. She drove over constantly from Roehampton and +entertained her friend with faint fashionable fiddle-faddle and feeble +Court slip-slop. Jos liked to hear it, but the Major used to go off +growling at the appearance of this woman, with her twopenny gentility. +He went to sleep under Frederick Bullock's bald head, after dinner, at +one of the banker's best parties (Fred was still anxious that the +balance of the Osborne property should be transferred from Stumpy and +Rowdy's to them), and whilst Amelia, who did not know Latin, or who +wrote the last crack article in the Edinburgh, and did not in the least +deplore, or otherwise, Mr. Peel's late extraordinary tergiversation on +the fatal Catholic Relief Bill, sat dumb amongst the ladies in the +grand drawing-room, looking out upon velvet lawns, trim gravel walks, +and glistening hot-houses. + +"She seems good-natured but insipid," said Mrs. Rowdy; "that Major +seems to be particularly epris." + +"She wants ton sadly," said Mrs. Hollyock. "My dear creature, you +never will be able to form her." + +"She is dreadfully ignorant or indifferent," said Mrs. Glowry with a +voice as if from the grave, and a sad shake of the head and turban. "I +asked her if she thought that it was in 1836, according to Mr. Jowls, +or in 1839, according to Mr. Wapshot, that the Pope was to fall: and +she said--'Poor Pope! I hope not--What has he done?'" + +"She is my brother's widow, my dear friends," Mrs. Frederick replied, +"and as such I think we're all bound to give her every attention and +instruction on entering into the world. You may fancy there can be no +MERCENARY motives in those whose DISAPPOINTMENTS are well known." + +"That poor dear Mrs. Bullock," said Rowdy to Hollyock, as they drove +away together--"she is always scheming and managing. She wants Mrs. +Osborne's account to be taken from our house to hers--and the way in +which she coaxes that boy and makes him sit by that blear-eyed little +Rosa is perfectly ridiculous." + +"I wish Glowry was choked with her Man of Sin and her Battle of +Armageddon," cried the other, and the carriage rolled away over Putney +Bridge. + +But this sort of society was too cruelly genteel for Emmy, and all +jumped for joy when a foreign tour was proposed. + + + +CHAPTER LXII + +Am Rhein + +The above everyday events had occurred, and a few weeks had passed, +when on one fine morning, Parliament being over, the summer advanced, +and all the good company in London about to quit that city for their +annual tour in search of pleasure or health, the Batavier steamboat +left the Tower-stairs laden with a goodly company of English fugitives. +The quarter-deck awnings were up, and the benches and gangways crowded +with scores of rosy children, bustling nursemaids; ladies in the +prettiest pink bonnets and summer dresses; gentlemen in travelling caps +and linen-jackets, whose mustachios had just begun to sprout for the +ensuing tour; and stout trim old veterans with starched neckcloths and +neat-brushed hats, such as have invaded Europe any time since the +conclusion of the war, and carry the national Goddem into every city of +the Continent. The congregation of hat-boxes, and Bramah desks, and +dressing-cases was prodigious. There were jaunty young Cambridge-men +travelling with their tutor, and going for a reading excursion to +Nonnenwerth or Konigswinter; there were Irish gentlemen, with the most +dashing whiskers and jewellery, talking about horses incessantly, and +prodigiously polite to the young ladies on board, whom, on the +contrary, the Cambridge lads and their pale-faced tutor avoided with +maiden coyness; there were old Pall Mall loungers bound for Ems and +Wiesbaden and a course of waters to clear off the dinners of the +season, and a little roulette and trente-et-quarante to keep the +excitement going; there was old Methuselah, who had married his young +wife, with Captain Papillon of the Guards holding her parasol and +guide-books; there was young May who was carrying off his bride on a +pleasure tour (Mrs. Winter that was, and who had been at school with +May's grandmother); there was Sir John and my Lady with a dozen +children, and corresponding nursemaids; and the great grandee Bareacres +family that sat by themselves near the wheel, stared at everybody, and +spoke to no one. Their carriages, emblazoned with coronets and heaped +with shining imperials, were on the foredeck, locked in with a dozen +more such vehicles: it was difficult to pass in and out amongst them; +and the poor inmates of the fore-cabin had scarcely any space for +locomotion. These consisted of a few magnificently attired gentlemen +from Houndsditch, who brought their own provisions, and could have +bought half the gay people in the grand saloon; a few honest fellows +with mustachios and portfolios, who set to sketching before they had +been half an hour on board; one or two French femmes de chambre who +began to be dreadfully ill by the time the boat had passed Greenwich; a +groom or two who lounged in the neighbourhood of the horse-boxes under +their charge, or leaned over the side by the paddle-wheels, and talked +about who was good for the Leger, and what they stood to win or lose +for the Goodwood cup. + +All the couriers, when they had done plunging about the ship and had +settled their various masters in the cabins or on the deck, congregated +together and began to chatter and smoke; the Hebrew gentlemen joining +them and looking at the carriages. There was Sir John's great carriage +that would hold thirteen people; my Lord Methuselah's carriage, my Lord +Bareacres' chariot, britzska, and fourgon, that anybody might pay for +who liked. It was a wonder how my Lord got the ready money to pay for +the expenses of the journey. The Hebrew gentlemen knew how he got it. +They knew what money his Lordship had in his pocket at that instant, +and what interest he paid for it, and who gave it him. Finally there +was a very neat, handsome travelling carriage, about which the +gentlemen speculated. + +"A qui cette voiture la?" said one gentleman-courier with a large +morocco money-bag and ear-rings to another with ear-rings and a large +morocco money-bag. + +"C'est a Kirsch je bense--je l'ai vu toute a l'heure--qui brenoit des +sangviches dans la voiture," said the courier in a fine German French. + +Kirsch emerging presently from the neighbourhood of the hold, where he +had been bellowing instructions intermingled with polyglot oaths to the +ship's men engaged in secreting the passengers' luggage, came to give +an account of himself to his brother interpreters. He informed them +that the carriage belonged to a Nabob from Calcutta and Jamaica +enormously rich, and with whom he was engaged to travel; and at this +moment a young gentleman who had been warned off the bridge between the +paddle-boxes, and who had dropped thence on to the roof of Lord +Methuselah's carriage, from which he made his way over other carriages +and imperials until he had clambered on to his own, descended thence +and through the window into the body of the carriage, to the applause +of the couriers looking on. + +"Nous allons avoir une belle traversee, Monsieur George," said the +courier with a grin, as he lifted his gold-laced cap. + +"D---- your French," said the young gentleman, "where's the biscuits, +ay?" Whereupon Kirsch answered him in the English language or in such +an imitation of it as he could command--for though he was familiar with +all languages, Mr. Kirsch was not acquainted with a single one, and +spoke all with indifferent volubility and incorrectness. + +The imperious young gentleman who gobbled the biscuits (and indeed it +was time to refresh himself, for he had breakfasted at Richmond full +three hours before) was our young friend George Osborne. Uncle Jos and +his mamma were on the quarter-deck with a gentleman of whom they used +to see a good deal, and the four were about to make a summer tour. + +Jos was seated at that moment on deck under the awning, and pretty +nearly opposite to the Earl of Bareacres and his family, whose +proceedings absorbed the Bengalee almost entirely. Both the noble +couple looked rather younger than in the eventful year '15, when Jos +remembered to have seen them at Brussels (indeed, he always gave out in +India that he was intimately acquainted with them). Lady Bareacres' +hair, which was then dark, was now a beautiful golden auburn, whereas +Lord Bareacres' whiskers, formerly red, were at present of a rich black +with purple and green reflections in the light. But changed as they +were, the movements of the noble pair occupied Jos's mind entirely. +The presence of a Lord fascinated him, and he could look at nothing +else. + +"Those people seem to interest you a good deal," said Dobbin, laughing +and watching him. Amelia too laughed. She was in a straw bonnet with +black ribbons, and otherwise dressed in mourning, but the little bustle +and holiday of the journey pleased and excited her, and she looked +particularly happy. + +"What a heavenly day!" Emmy said and added, with great originality, "I +hope we shall have a calm passage." + +Jos waved his hand, scornfully glancing at the same time under his +eyelids at the great folks opposite. "If you had made the voyages we +have," he said, "you wouldn't much care about the weather." But +nevertheless, traveller as he was, he passed the night direfully sick +in his carriage, where his courier tended him with brandy-and-water +and every luxury. + +In due time this happy party landed at the quays of Rotterdam, whence +they were transported by another steamer to the city of Cologne. Here +the carriage and the family took to the shore, and Jos was not a little +gratified to see his arrival announced in the Cologne newspapers as +"Herr Graf Lord von Sedley nebst Begleitung aus London." He had his +court dress with him; he had insisted that Dobbin should bring his +regimental paraphernalia; he announced that it was his intention to be +presented at some foreign courts, and pay his respects to the +Sovereigns of the countries which he honoured with a visit. + +Wherever the party stopped, and an opportunity was offered, Mr. Jos +left his own card and the Major's upon "Our Minister." It was with +great difficulty that he could be restrained from putting on his cocked +hat and tights to wait upon the English consul at the Free City of +Judenstadt, when that hospitable functionary asked our travellers to +dinner. He kept a journal of his voyage and noted elaborately the +defects or excellences of the various inns at which he put up, and of +the wines and dishes of which he partook. + +As for Emmy, she was very happy and pleased. Dobbin used to carry +about for her her stool and sketch-book, and admired the drawings of +the good-natured little artist as they never had been admired before. +She sat upon steamers' decks and drew crags and castles, or she mounted +upon donkeys and ascended to ancient robber-towers, attended by her two +aides-de-camp, Georgy and Dobbin. She laughed, and the Major did too, +at his droll figure on donkey-back, with his long legs touching the +ground. He was the interpreter for the party; having a good military +knowledge of the German language, and he and the delighted George +fought the campaigns of the Rhine and the Palatinate. In the course of +a few weeks, and by assiduously conversing with Herr Kirsch on the box +of the carriage, Georgy made prodigious advance in the knowledge of +High Dutch, and could talk to hotel waiters and postilions in a way +that charmed his mother and amused his guardian. + +Mr. Jos did not much engage in the afternoon excursions of his +fellow-travellers. He slept a good deal after dinner, or basked in the +arbours of the pleasant inn-gardens. Pleasant Rhine gardens! Fair +scenes of peace and sunshine--noble purple mountains, whose crests are +reflected in the magnificent stream--who has ever seen you that has not +a grateful memory of those scenes of friendly repose and beauty? To lay +down the pen and even to think of that beautiful Rhineland makes one +happy. At this time of summer evening, the cows are trooping down from +the hills, lowing and with their bells tinkling, to the old town, with +its old moats, and gates, and spires, and chestnut-trees, with long +blue shadows stretching over the grass; the sky and the river below +flame in crimson and gold; and the moon is already out, looking pale +towards the sunset. The sun sinks behind the great castle-crested +mountains, the night falls suddenly, the river grows darker and darker, +lights quiver in it from the windows in the old ramparts, and twinkle +peacefully in the villages under the hills on the opposite shore. + +So Jos used to go to sleep a good deal with his bandanna over his face +and be very comfortable, and read all the English news, and every word +of Galignani's admirable newspaper (may the blessings of all Englishmen +who have ever been abroad rest on the founders and proprietors of that +piratical print! ) and whether he woke or slept, his friends did not +very much miss him. Yes, they were very happy. They went to the opera +often of evenings--to those snug, unassuming, dear old operas in the +German towns, where the noblesse sits and cries, and knits stockings on +the one side, over against the bourgeoisie on the other; and His +Transparency the Duke and his Transparent family, all very fat and +good-natured, come and occupy the great box in the middle; and the pit +is full of the most elegant slim-waisted officers with straw-coloured +mustachios, and twopence a day on full pay. Here it was that Emmy found +her delight, and was introduced for the first time to the wonders of +Mozart and Cimarosa. The Major's musical taste has been before alluded +to, and his performances on the flute commended. But perhaps the chief +pleasure he had in these operas was in watching Emmy's rapture while +listening to them. A new world of love and beauty broke upon her when +she was introduced to those divine compositions; this lady had the +keenest and finest sensibility, and how could she be indifferent when +she heard Mozart? The tender parts of "Don Juan" awakened in her +raptures so exquisite that she would ask herself when she went to say +her prayers of a night whether it was not wicked to feel so much +delight as that with which "Vedrai Carino" and "Batti Batti" filled her +gentle little bosom? But the Major, whom she consulted upon this head, +as her theological adviser (and who himself had a pious and reverent +soul), said that for his part, every beauty of art or nature made him +thankful as well as happy, and that the pleasure to be had in listening +to fine music, as in looking at the stars in the sky, or at a beautiful +landscape or picture, was a benefit for which we might thank Heaven as +sincerely as for any other worldly blessing. And in reply to some +faint objections of Mrs. Amelia's (taken from certain theological works +like the Washerwoman of Finchley Common and others of that school, with +which Mrs. Osborne had been furnished during her life at Brompton) he +told her an Eastern fable of the Owl who thought that the sunshine was +unbearable for the eyes and that the Nightingale was a most overrated +bird. "It is one's nature to sing and the other's to hoot," he said, +laughing, "and with such a sweet voice as you have yourself, you must +belong to the Bulbul faction." + +I like to dwell upon this period of her life and to think that she was +cheerful and happy. You see, she has not had too much of that sort of +existence as yet, and has not fallen in the way of means to educate her +tastes or her intelligence. She has been domineered over hitherto by +vulgar intellects. It is the lot of many a woman. And as every one of +the dear sex is the rival of the rest of her kind, timidity passes for +folly in their charitable judgments; and gentleness for dulness; and +silence--which is but timid denial of the unwelcome assertion of ruling +folks, and tacit protestantism--above all, finds no mercy at the hands +of the female Inquisition. Thus, my dear and civilized reader, if you +and I were to find ourselves this evening in a society of greengrocers, +let us say, it is probable that our conversation would not be +brilliant; if, on the other hand, a greengrocer should find himself at +your refined and polite tea-table, where everybody was saying witty +things, and everybody of fashion and repute tearing her friends to +pieces in the most delightful manner, it is possible that the stranger +would not be very talkative and by no means interesting or interested. + +And it must be remembered that this poor lady had never met a gentleman +in her life until this present moment. Perhaps these are rarer +personages than some of us think for. Which of us can point out many +such in his circle--men whose aims are generous, whose truth is +constant, and not only constant in its kind but elevated in its degree; +whose want of meanness makes them simple; who can look the world +honestly in the face with an equal manly sympathy for the great and the +small? We all know a hundred whose coats are very well made, and a +score who have excellent manners, and one or two happy beings who are +what they call in the inner circles, and have shot into the very centre +and bull's-eye of the fashion; but of gentlemen how many? Let us take a +little scrap of paper and each make out his list. + +My friend the Major I write, without any doubt, in mine. He had very +long legs, a yellow face, and a slight lisp, which at first was rather +ridiculous. But his thoughts were just, his brains were fairly good, +his life was honest and pure, and his heart warm and humble. He +certainly had very large hands and feet, which the two George Osbornes +used to caricature and laugh at; and their jeers and laughter perhaps +led poor little Emmy astray as to his worth. But have we not all been +misled about our heroes and changed our opinions a hundred times? Emmy, +in this happy time, found that hers underwent a very great change in +respect of the merits of the Major. + +Perhaps it was the happiest time of both their lives, indeed, if they +did but know it--and who does? Which of us can point out and say that +was the culmination--that was the summit of human joy? But at all +events, this couple were very decently contented, and enjoyed as +pleasant a summer tour as any pair that left England that year. Georgy +was always present at the play, but it was the Major who put Emmy's +shawl on after the entertainment; and in the walks and excursions the +young lad would be on ahead, and up a tower-stair or a tree, whilst the +soberer couple were below, the Major smoking his cigar with great +placidity and constancy, whilst Emmy sketched the site or the ruin. It +was on this very tour that I, the present writer of a history of which +every word is true, had the pleasure to see them first and to make +their acquaintance. + +It was at the little comfortable Ducal town of Pumpernickel (that very +place where Sir Pitt Crawley had been so distinguished as an attache; +but that was in early early days, and before the news of the Battle of +Austerlitz sent all the English diplomatists in Germany to the right +about) that I first saw Colonel Dobbin and his party. They had arrived +with the carriage and courier at the Erbprinz Hotel, the best of the +town, and the whole party dined at the table d'hote. Everybody +remarked the majesty of Jos and the knowing way in which he sipped, or +rather sucked, the Johannisberger, which he ordered for dinner. The +little boy, too, we observed, had a famous appetite, and consumed +schinken, and braten, and kartoffeln, and cranberry jam, and salad, and +pudding, and roast fowls, and sweetmeats, with a gallantry that did +honour to his nation. After about fifteen dishes, he concluded the +repast with dessert, some of which he even carried out of doors, for +some young gentlemen at table, amused with his coolness and gallant +free-and-easy manner, induced him to pocket a handful of macaroons, +which he discussed on his way to the theatre, whither everybody went in +the cheery social little German place. The lady in black, the boy's +mamma, laughed and blushed, and looked exceedingly pleased and shy as +the dinner went on, and at the various feats and instances of +espieglerie on the part of her son. The Colonel--for so he became very +soon afterwards--I remember joked the boy with a great deal of grave +fun, pointing out dishes which he hadn't tried, and entreating him not +to baulk his appetite, but to have a second supply of this or that. + +It was what they call a gast-rolle night at the Royal Grand Ducal +Pumpernickelisch Hof--or Court theatre--and Madame Schroeder Devrient, +then in the bloom of her beauty and genius, performed the part of the +heroine in the wonderful opera of Fidelio. From our places in the +stalls we could see our four friends of the table d'hote in the loge +which Schwendler of the Erbprinz kept for his best guests, and I could +not help remarking the effect which the magnificent actress and music +produced upon Mrs. Osborne, for so we heard the stout gentleman in the +mustachios call her. During the astonishing Chorus of the Prisoners, +over which the delightful voice of the actress rose and soared in the +most ravishing harmony, the English lady's face wore such an expression +of wonder and delight that it struck even little Fipps, the blase +attache, who drawled out, as he fixed his glass upon her, "Gayd, it +really does one good to see a woman caypable of that stayt of +excaytement." And in the Prison Scene, where Fidelio, rushing to her +husband, cries, "Nichts, nichts, mein Florestan," she fairly lost +herself and covered her face with her handkerchief. Every woman in the +house was snivelling at the time, but I suppose it was because it was +predestined that I was to write this particular lady's memoirs that I +remarked her. + +The next day they gave another piece of Beethoven, Die Schlacht bei +Vittoria. Malbrook is introduced at the beginning of the performance, +as indicative of the brisk advance of the French army. Then come drums, +trumpets, thunders of artillery, and groans of the dying, and at last, +in a grand triumphal swell, "God Save the King" is performed. + +There may have been a score of Englishmen in the house, but at the +burst of that beloved and well-known music, every one of them, we young +fellows in the stalls, Sir John and Lady Bullminster (who had taken a +house at Pumpernickel for the education of their nine children), the +fat gentleman with the mustachios, the long Major in white duck +trousers, and the lady with the little boy upon whom he was so sweet, +even Kirsch, the courier in the gallery, stood bolt upright in their +places and proclaimed themselves to be members of the dear old British +nation. As for Tapeworm, the Charge d'Affaires, he rose up in his box +and bowed and simpered, as if he would represent the whole empire. +Tapeworm was nephew and heir of old Marshal Tiptoff, who has been +introduced in this story as General Tiptoff, just before Waterloo, who +was Colonel of the --th regiment in which Major Dobbin served, and who +died in this year full of honours, and of an aspic of plovers' eggs; +when the regiment was graciously given by his Majesty to Colonel Sir +Michael O'Dowd, K.C.B. who had commanded it in many glorious fields. + +Tapeworm must have met with Colonel Dobbin at the house of the +Colonel's Colonel, the Marshal, for he recognized him on this night at +the theatre, and with the utmost condescension, his Majesty's minister +came over from his own box and publicly shook hands with his new-found +friend. + +"Look at that infernal sly-boots of a Tapeworm," Fipps whispered, +examining his chief from the stalls. "Wherever there's a pretty woman +he always twists himself in." And I wonder what were diplomatists made +for but for that? + +"Have I the honour of addressing myself to Mrs. Dobbin?" asked the +Secretary with a most insinuating grin. + +Georgy burst out laughing and said, "By Jove, that was a good 'un." +Emmy and the Major blushed: we saw them from the stalls. + +"This lady is Mrs. George Osborne," said the Major, "and this is her +brother, Mr. Sedley, a distinguished officer of the Bengal Civil +Service: permit me to introduce him to your lordship." + +My lord nearly sent Jos off his legs with the most fascinating smile. +"Are you going to stop in Pumpernickel?" he said. "It is a dull place, +but we want some nice people, and we would try and make it SO agreeable +to you. Mr.--Ahum--Mrs.--Oho. I shall do myself the honour of calling +upon you to-morrow at your inn." And he went away with a Parthian grin +and glance which he thought must finish Mrs. Osborne completely. + +The performance over, the young fellows lounged about the lobbies, and +we saw the society take its departure. The Duchess Dowager went off in +her jingling old coach, attended by two faithful and withered old maids +of honour, and a little snuffy spindle-shanked gentleman in waiting, in +a brown jasey and a green coat covered with orders--of which the star +and the grand yellow cordon of the order of St. Michael of Pumpernickel +were most conspicuous. The drums rolled, the guards saluted, and the +old carriage drove away. + +Then came his Transparency the Duke and Transparent family, with his +great officers of state and household. He bowed serenely to everybody. +And amid the saluting of the guards and the flaring of the torches of +the running footmen, clad in scarlet, the Transparent carriages drove +away to the old Ducal schloss, with its towers and pinacles standing on +the schlossberg. Everybody in Pumpernickel knew everybody. No sooner +was a foreigner seen there than the Minister of Foreign Affairs, or +some other great or small officer of state, went round to the Erbprinz +and found out the name of the new arrival. + +We watched them, too, out of the theatre. Tapeworm had just walked +off, enveloped in his cloak, with which his gigantic chasseur was +always in attendance, and looking as much as possible like Don Juan. +The Prime Minister's lady had just squeezed herself into her sedan, and +her daughter, the charming Ida, had put on her calash and clogs; when +the English party came out, the boy yawning drearily, the Major taking +great pains in keeping the shawl over Mrs. Osborne's head, and Mr. +Sedley looking grand, with a crush opera-hat on one side of his head +and his hand in the stomach of a voluminous white waistcoat. We took +off our hats to our acquaintances of the table d'hote, and the lady, in +return, presented us with a little smile and a curtsey, for which +everybody might be thankful. + +The carriage from the inn, under the superintendence of the bustling +Mr. Kirsch, was in waiting to convey the party; but the fat man said he +would walk and smoke his cigar on his way homewards, so the other +three, with nods and smiles to us, went without Mr. Sedley, Kirsch, +with the cigar case, following in his master's wake. + +We all walked together and talked to the stout gentleman about the +agremens of the place. It was very agreeable for the English. There +were shooting-parties and battues; there was a plenty of balls and +entertainments at the hospitable Court; the society was generally good; +the theatre excellent; and the living cheap. + +"And our Minister seems a most delightful and affable person," our new +friend said. "With such a representative, and--and a good medical man, +I can fancy the place to be most eligible. Good-night, gentlemen." And +Jos creaked up the stairs to bedward, followed by Kirsch with a +flambeau. We rather hoped that nice-looking woman would be induced to +stay some time in the town. + + + +CHAPTER LXIII + +In Which We Meet an Old Acquaintance + +Such polite behaviour as that of Lord Tapeworm did not fail to have the +most favourable effect upon Mr. Sedley's mind, and the very next +morning, at breakfast, he pronounced his opinion that Pumpernickel was +the pleasantest little place of any which he had visited on their tour. +Jos's motives and artifices were not very difficult of comprehension, +and Dobbin laughed in his sleeve, like a hypocrite as he was, when he +found, by the knowing air of the civilian and the offhand manner in +which the latter talked about Tapeworm Castle and the other members of +the family, that Jos had been up already in the morning, consulting his +travelling Peerage. Yes, he had seen the Right Honourable the Earl of +Bagwig, his lordship's father; he was sure he had, he had met him +at--at the Levee--didn't Dob remember? and when the Diplomatist called +on the party, faithful to his promise, Jos received him with such a +salute and honours as were seldom accorded to the little Envoy. He +winked at Kirsch on his Excellency's arrival, and that emissary, +instructed before-hand, went out and superintended an entertainment of +cold meats, jellies, and other delicacies, brought in upon trays, and +of which Mr. Jos absolutely insisted that his noble guest should +partake. + +Tapeworm, so long as he could have an opportunity of admiring the +bright eyes of Mrs. Osborne (whose freshness of complexion bore +daylight remarkably well) was not ill pleased to accept any invitation +to stay in Mr. Sedley's lodgings; he put one or two dexterous questions +to him about India and the dancing-girls there; asked Amelia about that +beautiful boy who had been with her; and complimented the astonished +little woman upon the prodigious sensation which she had made in the +house; and tried to fascinate Dobbin by talking of the late war and the +exploits of the Pumpernickel contingent under the command of the +Hereditary Prince, now Duke of Pumpernickel. + +Lord Tapeworm inherited no little portion of the family gallantry, and +it was his happy belief that almost every woman upon whom he himself +cast friendly eyes was in love with him. He left Emmy under the +persuasion that she was slain by his wit and attractions and went home +to his lodgings to write a pretty little note to her. She was not +fascinated, only puzzled, by his grinning, his simpering, his scented +cambric handkerchief, and his high-heeled lacquered boots. She did not +understand one-half the compliments which he paid; she had never, in +her small experience of mankind, met a professional ladies' man as yet, +and looked upon my lord as something curious rather than pleasant; and +if she did not admire, certainly wondered at him. Jos, on the +contrary, was delighted. "How very affable his Lordship is," he said; +"How very kind of his Lordship to say he would send his medical man! +Kirsch, you will carry our cards to the Count de Schlusselback +directly; the Major and I will have the greatest pleasure in paying our +respects at Court as soon as possible. Put out my uniform, +Kirsch--both our uniforms. It is a mark of politeness which every +English gentleman ought to show to the countries which he visits to pay +his respects to the sovereigns of those countries as to the +representatives of his own." + +When Tapeworm's doctor came, Doctor von Glauber, Body Physician to +H.S.H. the Duke, he speedily convinced Jos that the Pumpernickel +mineral springs and the Doctor's particular treatment would infallibly +restore the Bengalee to youth and slimness. "Dere came here last +year," he said, "Sheneral Bulkeley, an English Sheneral, tvice so pic +as you, sir. I sent him back qvite tin after tree months, and he +danced vid Baroness Glauber at the end of two." + +Jos's mind was made up; the springs, the Doctor, the Court, and the +Charge d'Affaires convinced him, and he proposed to spend the autumn in +these delightful quarters. And punctual to his word, on the next day +the Charge d'Affaires presented Jos and the Major to Victor Aurelius +XVII, being conducted to their audience with that sovereign by the +Count de Schlusselback, Marshal of the Court. + +They were straightway invited to dinner at Court, and their intention +of staying in the town being announced, the politest ladies of the +whole town instantly called upon Mrs. Osborne; and as not one of these, +however poor they might be, was under the rank of a Baroness, Jos's +delight was beyond expression. He wrote off to Chutney at the Club to +say that the Service was highly appreciated in Germany, that he was +going to show his friend, the Count de Schlusselback, how to stick a +pig in the Indian fashion, and that his august friends, the Duke and +Duchess, were everything that was kind and civil. + +Emmy, too, was presented to the august family, and as mourning is not +admitted in Court on certain days, she appeared in a pink crape dress +with a diamond ornament in the corsage, presented to her by her +brother, and she looked so pretty in this costume that the Duke and +Court (putting out of the question the Major, who had scarcely ever +seen her before in an evening dress, and vowed that she did not look +five-and-twenty) all admired her excessively. + +In this dress she walked a Polonaise with Major Dobbin at a Court ball, +in which easy dance Mr. Jos had the honour of leading out the Countess +of Schlusselback, an old lady with a hump back, but with sixteen good +quarters of nobility and related to half the royal houses of Germany. + +Pumpernickel stands in the midst of a happy valley through which +sparkles--to mingle with the Rhine somewhere, but I have not the map at +hand to say exactly at what point--the fertilizing stream of the Pump. +In some places the river is big enough to support a ferry-boat, in +others to turn a mill; in Pumpernickel itself, the last Transparency +but three, the great and renowned Victor Aurelius XIV built a +magnificent bridge, on which his own statue rises, surrounded by +water-nymphs and emblems of victory, peace, and plenty; he has his foot +on the neck of a prostrate Turk--history says he engaged and ran a +Janissary through the body at the relief of Vienna by Sobieski--but, +quite undisturbed by the agonies of that prostrate Mahometan, who +writhes at his feet in the most ghastly manner, the Prince smiles +blandly and points with his truncheon in the direction of the Aurelius +Platz, where he began to erect a new palace that would have been the +wonder of his age had the great-souled Prince but had funds to +complete it. But the completion of Monplaisir (Monblaisir the honest +German folks call it) was stopped for lack of ready money, and it and +its park and garden are now in rather a faded condition, and not more +than ten times big enough to accommodate the Court of the reigning +Sovereign. + +The gardens were arranged to emulate those of Versailles, and amidst +the terraces and groves there are some huge allegorical waterworks +still, which spout and froth stupendously upon fete-days, and frighten +one with their enormous aquatic insurrections. There is the +Trophonius' cave in which, by some artifice, the leaden Tritons are +made not only to spout water, but to play the most dreadful groans out +of their lead conchs--there is the nymphbath and the Niagara cataract, +which the people of the neighbourhood admire beyond expression, when +they come to the yearly fair at the opening of the Chamber, or to the +fetes with which the happy little nation still celebrates the birthdays +and marriage-days of its princely governors. + +Then from all the towns of the Duchy, which stretches for nearly ten +mile--from Bolkum, which lies on its western frontier bidding defiance +to Prussia, from Grogwitz, where the Prince has a hunting-lodge, and +where his dominions are separated by the Pump River from those of the +neighbouring Prince of Potzenthal; from all the little villages, which +besides these three great cities, dot over the happy principality--from +the farms and the mills along the Pump come troops of people in red +petticoats and velvet head-dresses, or with three-cornered hats and +pipes in their mouths, who flock to the Residenz and share in the +pleasures of the fair and the festivities there. Then the theatre is +open for nothing, then the waters of Monblaisir begin to play (it is +lucky that there is company to behold them, for one would be afraid to +see them alone)--then there come mountebanks and riding troops (the way +in which his Transparency was fascinated by one of the horse-riders is +well known, and it is believed that La Petite Vivandiere, as she was +called, was a spy in the French interest), and the delighted people are +permitted to march through room after room of the Grand Ducal palace +and admire the slippery floor, the rich hangings, and the spittoons at +the doors of all the innumerable chambers. There is one Pavilion at +Monblaisir which Aurelius Victor XV had arranged--a great Prince but +too fond of pleasure--and which I am told is a perfect wonder of +licentious elegance. It is painted with the story of Bacchus and +Ariadne, and the table works in and out of the room by means of a +windlass, so that the company was served without any intervention of +domestics. But the place was shut up by Barbara, Aurelius XV's widow, +a severe and devout Princess of the House of Bolkum and Regent of the +Duchy during her son's glorious minority, and after the death of her +husband, cut off in the pride of his pleasures. + +The theatre of Pumpernickel is known and famous in that quarter of +Germany. It languished a little when the present Duke in his youth +insisted upon having his own operas played there, and it is said one +day, in a fury, from his place in the orchestra, when he attended a +rehearsal, broke a bassoon on the head of the Chapel Master, who was +conducting, and led too slow; and during which time the Duchess Sophia +wrote domestic comedies, which must have been very dreary to witness. +But the Prince executes his music in private now, and the Duchess only +gives away her plays to the foreigners of distinction who visit her +kind little Court. + +It is conducted with no small comfort and splendour. When there are +balls, though there may be four hundred people at supper, there is a +servant in scarlet and lace to attend upon every four, and every one is +served on silver. There are festivals and entertainments going +continually on, and the Duke has his chamberlains and equerries, and +the Duchess her mistress of the wardrobe and ladies of honour, just +like any other and more potent potentates. + +The Constitution is or was a moderate despotism, tempered by a Chamber +that might or might not be elected. I never certainly could hear of +its sitting in my time at Pumpernickel. The Prime Minister had +lodgings in a second floor, and the Foreign Secretary occupied the +comfortable lodgings over Zwieback's Conditorey. The army consisted of +a magnificent band that also did duty on the stage, where it was quite +pleasant to see the worthy fellows marching in Turkish dresses with +rouge on and wooden scimitars, or as Roman warriors with ophicleides +and trombones--to see them again, I say, at night, after one had +listened to them all the morning in the Aurelius Platz, where they +performed opposite the cafe where we breakfasted. Besides the band, +there was a rich and numerous staff of officers, and, I believe, a few +men. Besides the regular sentries, three or four men, habited as +hussars, used to do duty at the Palace, but I never saw them on +horseback, and au fait, what was the use of cavalry in a time of +profound peace?--and whither the deuce should the hussars ride? + +Everybody--everybody that was noble of course, for as for the bourgeois +we could not quite be expected to take notice of THEM--visited his +neighbour. H. E. Madame de Burst received once a week, H. E. Madame de +Schnurrbart had her night--the theatre was open twice a week, the Court +graciously received once, so that a man's life might in fact be a +perfect round of pleasure in the unpretending Pumpernickel way. + +That there were feuds in the place, no one can deny. Politics ran very +high at Pumpernickel, and parties were very bitter. There was the +Strumpff faction and the Lederlung party, the one supported by our +envoy and the other by the French Charge d'Affaires, M. de Macabau. +Indeed it sufficed for our Minister to stand up for Madame Strumpff, +who was clearly the greater singer of the two, and had three more notes +in her voice than Madame Lederlung her rival--it sufficed, I say, for +our Minister to advance any opinion to have it instantly contradicted +by the French diplomatist. + +Everybody in the town was ranged in one or other of these factions. The +Lederlung was a prettyish little creature certainly, and her voice +(what there was of it) was very sweet, and there is no doubt that the +Strumpff was not in her first youth and beauty, and certainly too +stout; when she came on in the last scene of the Sonnambula, for +instance, in her night-chemise with a lamp in her hand, and had to go +out of the window, and pass over the plank of the mill, it was all she +could do to squeeze out of the window, and the plank used to bend and +creak again under her weight--but how she poured out the finale of the +opera! and with what a burst of feeling she rushed into Elvino's +arms--almost fit to smother him! Whereas the little Lederlung--but a +truce to this gossip--the fact is that these two women were the two +flags of the French and the English party at Pumpernickel, and the +society was divided in its allegiance to those two great nations. + +We had on our side the Home Minister, the Master of the Horse, the +Duke's Private Secretary, and the Prince's Tutor; whereas of the French +party were the Foreign Minister, the Commander-in-Chief's Lady, who had +served under Napoleon, and the Hof-Marschall and his wife, who was glad +enough to get the fashions from Paris, and always had them and her caps +by M. de Macabau's courier. The Secretary of his Chancery was little +Grignac, a young fellow, as malicious as Satan, and who made +caricatures of Tapeworm in all the albums of the place. + +Their headquarters and table d'hote were established at the Pariser +Hof, the other inn of the town; and though, of course, these gentlemen +were obliged to be civil in public, yet they cut at each other with +epigrams that were as sharp as razors, as I have seen a couple of +wrestlers in Devonshire, lashing at each other's shins and never +showing their agony upon a muscle of their faces. Neither Tapeworm nor +Macabau ever sent home a dispatch to his government without a most +savage series of attacks upon his rival. For instance, on our side we +would write, "The interests of Great Britain in this place, and +throughout the whole of Germany, are perilled by the continuance in +office of the present French envoy; this man is of a character so +infamous that he will stick at no falsehood, or hesitate at no crime, +to attain his ends. He poisons the mind of the Court against the +English minister, represents the conduct of Great Britain in the most +odious and atrocious light, and is unhappily backed by a minister whose +ignorance and necessities are as notorious as his influence is fatal." +On their side they would say, "M. de Tapeworm continues his system of +stupid insular arrogance and vulgar falsehood against the greatest +nation in the world. Yesterday he was heard to speak lightly of Her +Royal Highness Madame the Duchess of Berri; on a former occasion he +insulted the heroic Duke of Angouleme and dared to insinuate that +H.R.H. the Duke of Orleans was conspiring against the august throne of +the lilies. His gold is prodigated in every direction which his stupid +menaces fail to frighten. By one and the other, he has won over +creatures of the Court here--and, in fine, Pumpernickel will not be +quiet, Germany tranquil, France respected, or Europe content until this +poisonous viper be crushed under heel": and so on. When one side or +the other had written any particularly spicy dispatch, news of it was +sure to slip out. + +Before the winter was far advanced, it is actually on record that Emmy +took a night and received company with great propriety and modesty. +She had a French master, who complimented her upon the purity of her +accent and her facility of learning; the fact is she had learned long +ago and grounded herself subsequently in the grammar so as to be able +to teach it to George; and Madam Strumpff came to give her lessons in +singing, which she performed so well and with such a true voice that +the Major's windows, who had lodgings opposite under the Prime +Minister, were always open to hear the lesson. Some of the German +ladies, who are very sentimental and simple in their tastes, fell in +love with her and began to call her du at once. These are trivial +details, but they relate to happy times. The Major made himself +George's tutor and read Caesar and mathematics with him, and they had a +German master and rode out of evenings by the side of Emmy's +carriage--she was always too timid, and made a dreadful outcry at the +slightest disturbance on horse-back. So she drove about with one of +her dear German friends, and Jos asleep on the back-seat of the +barouche. + +He was becoming very sweet upon the Grafinn Fanny de Butterbrod, a very +gentle tender-hearted and unassuming young creature, a Canoness and +Countess in her own right, but with scarcely ten pounds per year to her +fortune, and Fanny for her part declared that to be Amelia's sister was +the greatest delight that Heaven could bestow on her, and Jos might +have put a Countess's shield and coronet by the side of his own arms on +his carriage and forks; when--when events occurred, and those grand +fetes given upon the marriage of the Hereditary Prince of Pumpernickel +with the lovely Princess Amelia of Humbourg-Schlippenschloppen took +place. + +At this festival the magnificence displayed was such as had not been +known in the little German place since the days of the prodigal Victor +XIV. All the neighbouring Princes, Princesses, and Grandees were +invited to the feast. Beds rose to half a crown per night in +Pumpernickel, and the Army was exhausted in providing guards of honour +for the Highnesses, Serenities, and Excellencies who arrived from all +quarters. The Princess was married by proxy, at her father's +residence, by the Count de Schlusselback. Snuff-boxes were given away +in profusion (as we learned from the Court jeweller, who sold and +afterwards bought them again), and bushels of the Order of Saint +Michael of Pumpernickel were sent to the nobles of the Court, while +hampers of the cordons and decorations of the Wheel of St. Catherine of +Schlippenschloppen were brought to ours. The French envoy got both. +"He is covered with ribbons like a prize cart-horse," Tapeworm said, +who was not allowed by the rules of his service to take any +decorations: "Let him have the cordons; but with whom is the victory?" +The fact is, it was a triumph of British diplomacy, the French party +having proposed and tried their utmost to carry a marriage with a +Princess of the House of Potztausend-Donnerwetter, whom, as a matter +of course, we opposed. + +Everybody was asked to the fetes of the marriage. Garlands and +triumphal arches were hung across the road to welcome the young bride. +The great Saint Michael's Fountain ran with uncommonly sour wine, while +that in the Artillery Place frothed with beer. The great waters +played; and poles were put up in the park and gardens for the happy +peasantry, which they might climb at their leisure, carrying off +watches, silver forks, prize sausages hung with pink ribbon, &c., at +the top. Georgy got one, wrenching it off, having swarmed up the pole +to the delight of the spectators, and sliding down with the rapidity of +a fall of water. But it was for the glory's sake merely. The boy gave +the sausage to a peasant, who had very nearly seized it, and stood at +the foot of the mast, blubbering, because he was unsuccessful. + +At the French Chancellerie they had six more lampions in their +illumination than ours had; but our transparency, which represented the +young Couple advancing and Discord flying away, with the most ludicrous +likeness to the French Ambassador, beat the French picture hollow; and +I have no doubt got Tapeworm the advancement and the Cross of the Bath +which he subsequently attained. + +Crowds of foreigners arrived for the fetes, and of English, of course. +Besides the Court balls, public balls were given at the Town Hall and +the Redoute, and in the former place there was a room for +trente-et-quarante and roulette established, for the week of the +festivities only, and by one of the great German companies from Ems or +Aix-la-Chapelle. The officers or inhabitants of the town were not +allowed to play at these games, but strangers, peasants, ladies were +admitted, and any one who chose to lose or win money. + +That little scapegrace Georgy Osborne amongst others, whose pockets +were always full of dollars and whose relations were away at the grand +festival of the Court, came to the Stadthaus Ball in company of his +uncle's courier, Mr. Kirsch, and having only peeped into a play-room at +Baden-Baden when he hung on Dobbin's arm, and where, of course, he was +not permitted to gamble, came eagerly to this part of the entertainment +and hankered round the tables where the croupiers and the punters were +at work. Women were playing; they were masked, some of them; this +license was allowed in these wild times of carnival. + +A woman with light hair, in a low dress by no means so fresh as it had +been, and with a black mask on, through the eyelets of which her eyes +twinkled strangely, was seated at one of the roulette-tables with a +card and a pin and a couple of florins before her. As the croupier +called out the colour and number, she pricked on the card with great +care and regularity, and only ventured her money on the colours after +the red or black had come up a certain number of times. It was strange +to look at her. + +But in spite of her care and assiduity she guessed wrong and the last +two florins followed each other under the croupier's rake, as he cried +out with his inexorable voice the winning colour and number. She gave +a sigh, a shrug with her shoulders, which were already too much out of +her gown, and dashing the pin through the card on to the table, sat +thrumming it for a while. Then she looked round her and saw Georgy's +honest face staring at the scene. The little scamp! What business had +he to be there? + +When she saw the boy, at whose face she looked hard through her shining +eyes and mask, she said, "Monsieur n'est pas joueur?" + +"Non, Madame," said the boy; but she must have known, from his accent, +of what country he was, for she answered him with a slight foreign +tone. "You have nevare played--will you do me a littl' favor?" + +"What is it?" said Georgy, blushing again. Mr. Kirsch was at work for +his part at the rouge et noir and did not see his young master. + +"Play this for me, if you please; put it on any number, any number." +And she took from her bosom a purse, and out of it a gold piece, the +only coin there, and she put it into George's hand. The boy laughed +and did as he was bid. + +The number came up sure enough. There is a power that arranges that, +they say, for beginners. + +"Thank you," said she, pulling the money towards her, "thank you. What +is your name?" + +"My name's Osborne," said Georgy, and was fingering in his own pockets +for dollars, and just about to make a trial, when the Major, in his +uniform, and Jos, en Marquis, from the Court ball, made their +appearance. Other people, finding the entertainment stupid and +preferring the fun at the Stadthaus, had quitted the Palace ball +earlier; but it is probable the Major and Jos had gone home and found +the boy's absence, for the former instantly went up to him and, taking +him by the shoulder, pulled him briskly back from the place of +temptation. Then, looking round the room, he saw Kirsch employed as we +have said, and going up to him, asked how he dared to bring Mr. George +to such a place. + +"Laissez-moi tranquille," said Mr. Kirsch, very much excited by play +and wine. "Il faut s'amuser, parbleu. Je ne suis pas au service de +Monsieur." + +Seeing his condition the Major did not choose to argue with the man, +but contented himself with drawing away George and asking Jos if he +would come away. He was standing close by the lady in the mask, who +was playing with pretty good luck now, and looking on much interested +at the game. + +"Hadn't you better come, Jos," the Major said, "with George and me?" + +"I'll stop and go home with that rascal, Kirsch," Jos said; and for the +same reason of modesty, which he thought ought to be preserved before +the boy, Dobbin did not care to remonstrate with Jos, but left him and +walked home with Georgy. + +"Did you play?" asked the Major when they were out and on their way +home. + +The boy said "No." + +"Give me your word of honour as a gentleman that you never will." + +"Why?" said the boy; "it seems very good fun." And, in a very eloquent +and impressive manner, the Major showed him why he shouldn't, and would +have enforced his precepts by the example of Georgy's own father, had +he liked to say anything that should reflect on the other's memory. +When he had housed him, he went to bed and saw his light, in the little +room outside of Amelia's, presently disappear. Amelia's followed half +an hour afterwards. I don't know what made the Major note it so +accurately. + +Jos, however, remained behind over the play-table; he was no gambler, +but not averse to the little excitement of the sport now and then, and +he had some Napoleons chinking in the embroidered pockets of his court +waistcoat. He put down one over the fair shoulder of the little +gambler before him, and they won. She made a little movement to make +room for him by her side, and just took the skirt of her gown from a +vacant chair there. + +"Come and give me good luck," she said, still in a foreign accent, +quite different from that frank and perfectly English "Thank you," with +which she had saluted Georgy's coup in her favour. The portly +gentleman, looking round to see that nobody of rank observed him, sat +down; he muttered--"Ah, really, well now, God bless my soul. I'm very +fortunate; I'm sure to give you good fortune," and other words of +compliment and confusion. "Do you play much?" the foreign mask said. + +"I put a Nap or two down," said Jos with a superb air, flinging down a +gold piece. + +"Yes; ay nap after dinner," said the mask archly. But Jos looking +frightened, she continued, in her pretty French accent, "You do not +play to win. No more do I. I play to forget, but I cannot. I cannot +forget old times, monsieur. Your little nephew is the image of his +father; and you--you are not changed--but yes, you are. Everybody +changes, everybody forgets; nobody has any heart." + +"Good God, who is it?" asked Jos in a flutter. + +"Can't you guess, Joseph Sedley?" said the little woman in a sad voice, +and undoing her mask, she looked at him. "You have forgotten me." + +"Good heavens! Mrs. Crawley!" gasped out Jos. + +"Rebecca," said the other, putting her hand on his; but she followed +the game still, all the time she was looking at him. + +"I am stopping at the Elephant," she continued. "Ask for Madame de +Raudon. I saw my dear Amelia to-day; how pretty she looked, and how +happy! So do you! Everybody but me, who am wretched, Joseph Sedley." +And she put her money over from the red to the black, as if by a chance +movement of her hand, and while she was wiping her eyes with a +pocket-handkerchief fringed with torn lace. + +The red came up again, and she lost the whole of that stake. "Come +away," she said. "Come with me a little--we are old friends, are we +not, dear Mr. Sedley?" + +And Mr. Kirsch having lost all his money by this time, followed his +master out into the moonlight, where the illuminations were winking out +and the transparency over our mission was scarcely visible. + + + +CHAPTER LXIV + +A Vagabond Chapter + +We must pass over a part of Mrs. Rebecca Crawley's biography with that +lightness and delicacy which the world demands--the moral world, that +has, perhaps, no particular objection to vice, but an insuperable +repugnance to hearing vice called by its proper name. There are things +we do and know perfectly well in Vanity Fair, though we never speak of +them: as the Ahrimanians worship the devil, but don't mention him: +and a polite public will no more bear to read an authentic description +of vice than a truly refined English or American female will permit the +word breeches to be pronounced in her chaste hearing. And yet, madam, +both are walking the world before our faces every day, without much +shocking us. If you were to blush every time they went by, what +complexions you would have! It is only when their naughty names are +called out that your modesty has any occasion to show alarm or sense of +outrage, and it has been the wish of the present writer, all through +this story, deferentially to submit to the fashion at present +prevailing, and only to hint at the existence of wickedness in a light, +easy, and agreeable manner, so that nobody's fine feelings may be +offended. I defy any one to say that our Becky, who has certainly some +vices, has not been presented to the public in a perfectly genteel and +inoffensive manner. In describing this Siren, singing and smiling, +coaxing and cajoling, the author, with modest pride, asks his readers +all round, has he once forgotten the laws of politeness, and showed the +monster's hideous tail above water? No! Those who like may peep down +under waves that are pretty transparent and see it writhing and +twirling, diabolically hideous and slimy, flapping amongst bones, or +curling round corpses; but above the waterline, I ask, has not +everything been proper, agreeable, and decorous, and has any the most +squeamish immoralist in Vanity Fair a right to cry fie? When, however, +the Siren disappears and dives below, down among the dead men, the +water of course grows turbid over her, and it is labour lost to look +into it ever so curiously. They look pretty enough when they sit upon +a rock, twanging their harps and combing their hair, and sing, and +beckon to you to come and hold the looking-glass; but when they sink +into their native element, depend on it, those mermaids are about no +good, and we had best not examine the fiendish marine cannibals, +revelling and feasting on their wretched pickled victims. And so, when +Becky is out of the way, be sure that she is not particularly well +employed, and that the less that is said about her doings is in fact +the better. + +If we were to give a full account of her proceedings during a couple of +years that followed after the Curzon Street catastrophe, there might be +some reason for people to say this book was improper. The actions of +very vain, heartless, pleasure-seeking people are very often improper +(as are many of yours, my friend with the grave face and spotless +reputation--but that is merely by the way); and what are those of a +woman without faith--or love--or character? And I am inclined to think +that there was a period in Mrs. Becky's life when she was seized, not by +remorse, but by a kind of despair, and absolutely neglected her person +and did not even care for her reputation. + +This abattement and degradation did not take place all at once; it was +brought about by degrees, after her calamity, and after many struggles +to keep up--as a man who goes overboard hangs on to a spar whilst any +hope is left, and then flings it away and goes down, when he finds that +struggling is in vain. + +She lingered about London whilst her husband was making preparations +for his departure to his seat of government, and it is believed made +more than one attempt to see her brother-in-law, Sir Pitt Crawley, and +to work upon his feelings, which she had almost enlisted in her favour. +As Sir Pitt and Mr. Wenham were walking down to the House of Commons, +the latter spied Mrs. Rawdon in a black veil, and lurking near the +palace of the legislature. She sneaked away when her eyes met those of +Wenham, and indeed never succeeded in her designs upon the Baronet. + +Probably Lady Jane interposed. I have heard that she quite astonished +her husband by the spirit which she exhibited in this quarrel, and her +determination to disown Mrs. Becky. Of her own movement, she invited +Rawdon to come and stop in Gaunt Street until his departure for +Coventry Island, knowing that with him for a guard Mrs. Becky would not +try to force her door; and she looked curiously at the superscriptions +of all the letters which arrived for Sir Pitt, lest he and his +sister-in-law should be corresponding. Not but that Rebecca could have +written had she a mind, but she did not try to see or to write to Pitt +at his own house, and after one or two attempts consented to his demand +that the correspondence regarding her conjugal differences should be +carried on by lawyers only. + +The fact was that Pitt's mind had been poisoned against her. A short +time after Lord Steyne's accident Wenham had been with the Baronet and +given him such a biography of Mrs. Becky as had astonished the member +for Queen's Crawley. He knew everything regarding her: who her father +was; in what year her mother danced at the opera; what had been her +previous history; and what her conduct during her married life--as I +have no doubt that the greater part of the story was false and dictated +by interested malevolence, it shall not be repeated here. But Becky +was left with a sad sad reputation in the esteem of a country gentleman +and relative who had been once rather partial to her. + +The revenues of the Governor of Coventry Island are not large. A part +of them were set aside by his Excellency for the payment of certain +outstanding debts and liabilities, the charges incident on his high +situation required considerable expense; finally, it was found that he +could not spare to his wife more than three hundred pounds a year, +which he proposed to pay to her on an undertaking that she would never +trouble him. Otherwise, scandal, separation, Doctors' Commons would +ensue. But it was Mr. Wenham's business, Lord Steyne's business, +Rawdon's, everybody's--to get her out of the country, and hush up a +most disagreeable affair. + +She was probably so much occupied in arranging these affairs of +business with her husband's lawyers that she forgot to take any step +whatever about her son, the little Rawdon, and did not even once +propose to go and see him. That young gentleman was consigned to the +entire guardianship of his aunt and uncle, the former of whom had +always possessed a great share of the child's affection. His mamma +wrote him a neat letter from Boulogne, when she quitted England, in +which she requested him to mind his book, and said she was going to +take a Continental tour, during which she would have the pleasure of +writing to him again. But she never did for a year afterwards, and +not, indeed, until Sir Pitt's only boy, always sickly, died of +hooping-cough and measles--then Rawdon's mamma wrote the most +affectionate composition to her darling son, who was made heir of +Queen's Crawley by this accident, and drawn more closely than ever to +the kind lady, whose tender heart had already adopted him. Rawdon +Crawley, then grown a tall, fine lad, blushed when he got the letter. +"Oh, Aunt Jane, you are my mother!" he said; "and not--and not that +one." But he wrote back a kind and respectful letter to Mrs. Rebecca, +then living at a boarding-house at Florence. But we are advancing +matters. + +Our darling Becky's first flight was not very far. She perched upon +the French coast at Boulogne, that refuge of so much exiled English +innocence, and there lived in rather a genteel, widowed manner, with a +femme de chambre and a couple of rooms, at an hotel. She dined at the +table d'hote, where people thought her very pleasant, and where she +entertained her neighbours by stories of her brother, Sir Pitt, and her +great London acquaintance, talking that easy, fashionable slip-slop +which has so much effect upon certain folks of small breeding. She +passed with many of them for a person of importance; she gave little +tea-parties in her private room and shared in the innocent amusements +of the place in sea-bathing, and in jaunts in open carriages, in +strolls on the sands, and in visits to the play. Mrs. Burjoice, the +printer's lady, who was boarding with her family at the hotel for the +summer, and to whom her Burjoice came of a Saturday and Sunday, voted +her charming, until that little rogue of a Burjoice began to pay her +too much attention. But there was nothing in the story, only that +Becky was always affable, easy, and good-natured--and with men +especially. + +Numbers of people were going abroad as usual at the end of the season, +and Becky had plenty of opportunities of finding out by the behaviour +of her acquaintances of the great London world the opinion of "society" +as regarded her conduct. One day it was Lady Partlet and her daughters +whom Becky confronted as she was walking modestly on Boulogne pier, the +cliffs of Albion shining in the distance across the deep blue sea. +Lady Partlet marshalled all her daughters round her with a sweep of her +parasol and retreated from the pier, darting savage glances at poor +little Becky who stood alone there. + +On another day the packet came in. It had been blowing fresh, and it +always suited Becky's humour to see the droll woe-begone faces of the +people as they emerged from the boat. Lady Slingstone happened to be +on board this day. Her ladyship had been exceedingly ill in her +carriage, and was greatly exhausted and scarcely fit to walk up the +plank from the ship to the pier. But all her energies rallied the +instant she saw Becky smiling roguishly under a pink bonnet, and giving +her a glance of scorn such as would have shrivelled up most women, she +walked into the Custom House quite unsupported. Becky only laughed: +but I don't think she liked it. She felt she was alone, quite alone, +and the far-off shining cliffs of England were impassable to her. + +The behaviour of the men had undergone too I don't know what change. +Grinstone showed his teeth and laughed in her face with a familiarity +that was not pleasant. Little Bob Suckling, who was cap in hand to her +three months before, and would walk a mile in the rain to see for her +carriage in the line at Gaunt House, was talking to Fitzoof of the +Guards (Lord Heehaw's son) one day upon the jetty, as Becky took her +walk there. Little Bobby nodded to her over his shoulder, without +moving his hat, and continued his conversation with the heir of Heehaw. +Tom Raikes tried to walk into her sitting-room at the inn with a cigar +in his mouth, but she closed the door upon him, and would have locked +it, only that his fingers were inside. She began to feel that she was +very lonely indeed. "If HE'D been here," she said, "those cowards +would never have dared to insult me." She thought about "him" with +great sadness and perhaps longing--about his honest, stupid, constant +kindness and fidelity; his never-ceasing obedience; his good humour; +his bravery and courage. Very likely she cried, for she was +particularly lively, and had put on a little extra rouge, when she came +down to dinner. + +She rouged regularly now; and--and her maid got Cognac for her besides +that which was charged in the hotel bill. + +Perhaps the insults of the men were not, however, so intolerable to her +as the sympathy of certain women. Mrs. Crackenbury and Mrs. Washington +White passed through Boulogne on their way to Switzerland. The party +were protected by Colonel Horner, young Beaumoris, and of course old +Crackenbury, and Mrs. White's little girl. THEY did not avoid her. +They giggled, cackled, tattled, condoled, consoled, and patronized her +until they drove her almost wild with rage. To be patronized by THEM! +she thought, as they went away simpering after kissing her. And she +heard Beaumoris's laugh ringing on the stair and knew quite well how to +interpret his hilarity. + +It was after this visit that Becky, who had paid her weekly bills, +Becky who had made herself agreeable to everybody in the house, who +smiled at the landlady, called the waiters "monsieur," and paid the +chambermaids in politeness and apologies, what far more than +compensated for a little niggardliness in point of money (of which +Becky never was free), that Becky, we say, received a notice to quit +from the landlord, who had been told by some one that she was quite an +unfit person to have at his hotel, where English ladies would not sit +down with her. And she was forced to fly into lodgings of which the +dulness and solitude were most wearisome to her. + +Still she held up, in spite of these rebuffs, and tried to make a +character for herself and conquer scandal. She went to church very +regularly and sang louder than anybody there. She took up the cause of +the widows of the shipwrecked fishermen, and gave work and drawings for +the Quashyboo Mission; she subscribed to the Assembly and WOULDN'T +waltz. In a word, she did everything that was respectable, and that is +why we dwell upon this part of her career with more fondness than upon +subsequent parts of her history, which are not so pleasant. She saw +people avoiding her, and still laboriously smiled upon them; you never +could suppose from her countenance what pangs of humiliation she might +be enduring inwardly. + +Her history was after all a mystery. Parties were divided about her. +Some people who took the trouble to busy themselves in the matter said +that she was the criminal, whilst others vowed that she was as innocent +as a lamb and that her odious husband was in fault. She won over a good +many by bursting into tears about her boy and exhibiting the most +frantic grief when his name was mentioned, or she saw anybody like him. +She gained good Mrs. Alderney's heart in that way, who was rather the +Queen of British Boulogne and gave the most dinners and balls of all +the residents there, by weeping when Master Alderney came from Dr. +Swishtail's academy to pass his holidays with his mother. "He and her +Rawdon were of the same age, and so like," Becky said in a voice +choking with agony; whereas there was five years' difference between +the boys' ages, and no more likeness between them than between my +respected reader and his humble servant. Wenham, when he was going +abroad, on his way to Kissingen to join Lord Steyne, enlightened Mrs. +Alderney on this point and told her how he was much more able to +describe little Rawdon than his mamma, who notoriously hated him and +never saw him; how he was thirteen years old, while little Alderney was +but nine, fair, while the other darling was dark--in a word, caused the +lady in question to repent of her good humour. + +Whenever Becky made a little circle for herself with incredible toils +and labour, somebody came and swept it down rudely, and she had all her +work to begin over again. It was very hard; very hard; lonely and +disheartening. + +There was Mrs. Newbright, who took her up for some time, attracted by +the sweetness of her singing at church and by her proper views upon +serious subjects, concerning which in former days, at Queen's Crawley, +Mrs. Becky had had a good deal of instruction. Well, she not only took +tracts, but she read them. She worked flannel petticoats for the +Quashyboos--cotton night-caps for the Cocoanut Indians--painted +handscreens for the conversion of the Pope and the Jews--sat under Mr. +Rowls on Wednesdays, Mr. Huggleton on Thursdays, attended two Sunday +services at church, besides Mr. Bawler, the Darbyite, in the evening, +and all in vain. Mrs. Newbright had occasion to correspond with the +Countess of Southdown about the Warmingpan Fund for the Fiji Islanders +(for the management of which admirable charity both these ladies formed +part of a female committee), and having mentioned her "sweet friend," +Mrs. Rawdon Crawley, the Dowager Countess wrote back such a letter +regarding Becky, with such particulars, hints, facts, falsehoods, and +general comminations, that intimacy between Mrs. Newbright and Mrs. +Crawley ceased forthwith, and all the serious world of Tours, where +this misfortune took place, immediately parted company with the +reprobate. Those who know the English Colonies abroad know that we +carry with us us our pride, pills, prejudices, Harvey-sauces, +cayenne-peppers, and other Lares, making a little Britain wherever we +settle down. + +From one colony to another Becky fled uneasily. From Boulogne to +Dieppe, from Dieppe to Caen, from Caen to Tours--trying with all her +might to be respectable, and alas! always found out some day or other +and pecked out of the cage by the real daws. + +Mrs. Hook Eagles took her up at one of these places--a woman without a +blemish in her character and a house in Portman Square. She was +staying at the hotel at Dieppe, whither Becky fled, and they made each +other's acquaintance first at sea, where they were swimming together, +and subsequently at the table d'hote of the hotel. Mrs. Eagles had +heard--who indeed had not?--some of the scandal of the Steyne affair; +but after a conversation with Becky, she pronounced that Mrs. Crawley +was an angel, her husband a ruffian, Lord Steyne an unprincipled +wretch, as everybody knew, and the whole case against Mrs. Crawley an +infamous and wicked conspiracy of that rascal Wenham. "If you were a +man of any spirit, Mr. Eagles, you would box the wretch's ears the next +time you see him at the Club," she said to her husband. But Eagles was +only a quiet old gentleman, husband to Mrs. Eagles, with a taste for +geology, and not tall enough to reach anybody's ears. + +The Eagles then patronized Mrs. Rawdon, took her to live with her at +her own house at Paris, quarrelled with the ambassador's wife because +she would not receive her protegee, and did all that lay in woman's +power to keep Becky straight in the paths of virtue and good repute. + +Becky was very respectable and orderly at first, but the life of +humdrum virtue grew utterly tedious to her before long. It was the +same routine every day, the same dulness and comfort, the same drive +over the same stupid Bois de Boulogne, the same company of an evening, +the same Blair's Sermon of a Sunday night--the same opera always being +acted over and over again; Becky was dying of weariness, when, luckily +for her, young Mr. Eagles came from Cambridge, and his mother, seeing +the impression which her little friend made upon him, straightway gave +Becky warning. + +Then she tried keeping house with a female friend; then the double +menage began to quarrel and get into debt. Then she determined upon a +boarding-house existence and lived for some time at that famous mansion +kept by Madame de Saint Amour, in the Rue Royale, at Paris, where she +began exercising her graces and fascinations upon the shabby dandies +and fly-blown beauties who frequented her landlady's salons. Becky +loved society and, indeed, could no more exist without it than an +opium-eater without his dram, and she was happy enough at the period of +her boarding-house life. "The women here are as amusing as those in +May Fair," she told an old London friend who met her, "only, their +dresses are not quite so fresh. The men wear cleaned gloves, and are +sad rogues, certainly, but they are not worse than Jack This and Tom +That. The mistress of the house is a little vulgar, but I don't think +she is so vulgar as Lady ------" and here she named the name of a great +leader of fashion that I would die rather than reveal. In fact, when +you saw Madame de Saint Amour's rooms lighted up of a night, men with +plaques and cordons at the ecarte tables, and the women at a little +distance, you might fancy yourself for a while in good society, and +that Madame was a real Countess. Many people did so fancy, and Becky +was for a while one of the most dashing ladies of the Countess's salons. + +But it is probable that her old creditors of 1815 found her out and +caused her to leave Paris, for the poor little woman was forced to fly +from the city rather suddenly, and went thence to Brussels. + +How well she remembered the place! She grinned as she looked up at the +little entresol which she had occupied, and thought of the Bareacres +family, bawling for horses and flight, as their carriage stood in the +porte-cochere of the hotel. She went to Waterloo and to Laeken, where +George Osborne's monument much struck her. She made a little sketch of +it. "That poor Cupid!" she said; "how dreadfully he was in love with +me, and what a fool he was! I wonder whether little Emmy is alive. It +was a good little creature; and that fat brother of hers. I have his +funny fat picture still among my papers. They were kind simple people." + +At Brussels Becky arrived, recommended by Madame de Saint Amour to her +friend, Madame la Comtesse de Borodino, widow of Napoleon's General, +the famous Count de Borodino, who was left with no resource by the +deceased hero but that of a table d'hote and an ecarte table. +Second-rate dandies and roues, widow-ladies who always have a lawsuit, +and very simple English folks, who fancy they see "Continental society" +at these houses, put down their money, or ate their meals, at Madame de +Borodino's tables. The gallant young fellows treated the company round +to champagne at the table d'hote, rode out with the women, or hired +horses on country excursions, clubbed money to take boxes at the play +or the opera, betted over the fair shoulders of the ladies at the +ecarte tables, and wrote home to their parents in Devonshire about +their felicitous introduction to foreign society. + +Here, as at Paris, Becky was a boarding-house queen, and ruled in +select pensions. She never refused the champagne, or the bouquets, or +the drives into the country, or the private boxes; but what she +preferred was the ecarte at night,--and she played audaciously. First +she played only for a little, then for five-franc pieces, then for +Napoleons, then for notes: then she would not be able to pay her +month's pension: then she borrowed from the young gentlemen: then she +got into cash again and bullied Madame de Borodino, whom she had coaxed +and wheedled before: then she was playing for ten sous at a time, and +in a dire state of poverty: then her quarter's allowance would come +in, and she would pay off Madame de Borodino's score and would once +more take the cards against Monsieur de Rossignol, or the Chevalier de +Raff. + +When Becky left Brussels, the sad truth is that she owed three months' +pension to Madame de Borodino, of which fact, and of the gambling, and +of the drinking, and of the going down on her knees to the Reverend Mr. +Muff, Ministre Anglican, and borrowing money of him, and of her coaxing +and flirting with Milor Noodle, son of Sir Noodle, pupil of the Rev. +Mr. Muff, whom she used to take into her private room, and of whom she +won large sums at ecarte--of which fact, I say, and of a hundred of her +other knaveries, the Countess de Borodino informs every English person +who stops at her establishment, and announces that Madame Rawdon was no +better than a vipere. + +So our little wanderer went about setting up her tent in various cities +of Europe, as restless as Ulysses or Bampfylde Moore Carew. Her taste +for disrespectability grew more and more remarkable. She became a +perfect Bohemian ere long, herding with people whom it would make your +hair stand on end to meet. + +There is no town of any mark in Europe but it has its little colony of +English raffs--men whose names Mr. Hemp the officer reads out +periodically at the Sheriffs' Court--young gentlemen of very good +family often, only that the latter disowns them; frequenters of +billiard-rooms and estaminets, patrons of foreign races and +gaming-tables. They people the debtors' prisons--they drink and +swagger--they fight and brawl--they run away without paying--they have +duels with French and German officers--they cheat Mr. Spooney at +ecarte--they get the money and drive off to Baden in magnificent +britzkas--they try their infallible martingale and lurk about the tables +with empty pockets, shabby bullies, penniless bucks, until they can +swindle a Jew banker with a sham bill of exchange, or find another Mr. +Spooney to rob. The alternations of splendour and misery which these +people undergo are very queer to view. Their life must be one of great +excitement. Becky--must it be owned?--took to this life, and took to +it not unkindly. She went about from town to town among these +Bohemians. The lucky Mrs. Rawdon was known at every play-table in +Germany. She and Madame de Cruchecassee kept house at Florence +together. It is said she was ordered out of Munich, and my friend Mr. +Frederick Pigeon avers that it was at her house at Lausanne that he was +hocussed at supper and lost eight hundred pounds to Major Loder and the +Honourable Mr. Deuceace. We are bound, you see, to give some account +of Becky's biography, but of this part, the less, perhaps, that is said +the better. + +They say that, when Mrs. Crawley was particularly down on her luck, she +gave concerts and lessons in music here and there. There was a Madame +de Raudon, who certainly had a matinee musicale at Wildbad, accompanied +by Herr Spoff, premier pianist to the Hospodar of Wallachia, and my +little friend Mr. Eaves, who knew everybody and had travelled +everywhere, always used to declare that he was at Strasburg in the year +1830, when a certain Madame Rebecque made her appearance in the opera +of the Dame Blanche, giving occasion to a furious row in the theatre +there. She was hissed off the stage by the audience, partly from her +own incompetency, but chiefly from the ill-advised sympathy of some +persons in the parquet, (where the officers of the garrison had their +admissions); and Eaves was certain that the unfortunate debutante in +question was no other than Mrs. Rawdon Crawley. + +She was, in fact, no better than a vagabond upon this earth. When she +got her money she gambled; when she had gambled it she was put to +shifts to live; who knows how or by what means she succeeded? It is +said that she was once seen at St. Petersburg, but was summarily +dismissed from that capital by the police, so that there cannot be any +possibility of truth in the report that she was a Russian spy at +Toplitz and Vienna afterwards. I have even been informed that at Paris +she discovered a relation of her own, no less a person than her +maternal grandmother, who was not by any means a Montmorenci, but a +hideous old box-opener at a theatre on the Boulevards. The meeting +between them, of which other persons, as it is hinted elsewhere, seem +to have been acquainted, must have been a very affecting interview. +The present historian can give no certain details regarding the event. + +It happened at Rome once that Mrs. de Rawdon's half-year's salary had +just been paid into the principal banker's there, and, as everybody who +had a balance of above five hundred scudi was invited to the balls +which this prince of merchants gave during the winter, Becky had the +honour of a card, and appeared at one of the Prince and Princess +Polonia's splendid evening entertainments. The Princess was of the +family of Pompili, lineally descended from the second king of Rome, and +Egeria of the house of Olympus, while the Prince's grandfather, +Alessandro Polonia, sold wash-balls, essences, tobacco, and +pocket-handkerchiefs, ran errands for gentlemen, and lent money in a +small way. All the great company in Rome thronged to his +saloons--Princes, Dukes, Ambassadors, artists, fiddlers, monsignori, +young bears with their leaders--every rank and condition of man. His +halls blazed with light and magnificence; were resplendent with gilt +frames (containing pictures), and dubious antiques; and the enormous +gilt crown and arms of the princely owner, a gold mushroom on a crimson +field (the colour of the pocket-handkerchiefs which he sold), and the +silver fountain of the Pompili family shone all over the roof, doors, +and panels of the house, and over the grand velvet baldaquins prepared +to receive Popes and Emperors. + +So Becky, who had arrived in the diligence from Florence, and was +lodged at an inn in a very modest way, got a card for Prince Polonia's +entertainment, and her maid dressed her with unusual care, and she went +to this fine ball leaning on the arm of Major Loder, with whom she +happened to be travelling at the time--(the same man who shot Prince +Ravoli at Naples the next year, and was caned by Sir John Buckskin for +carrying four kings in his hat besides those which he used in playing +at ecarte )--and this pair went into the rooms together, and Becky saw +a number of old faces which she remembered in happier days, when she +was not innocent, but not found out. Major Loder knew a great number of +foreigners, keen-looking whiskered men with dirty striped ribbons in +their buttonholes, and a very small display of linen; but his own +countrymen, it might be remarked, eschewed the Major. Becky, too, knew +some ladies here and there--French widows, dubious Italian countesses, +whose husbands had treated them ill--faugh--what shall we say, we who +have moved among some of the finest company of Vanity Fair, of this +refuse and sediment of rascals? If we play, let it be with clean cards, +and not with this dirty pack. But every man who has formed one of the +innumerable army of travellers has seen these marauding irregulars +hanging on, like Nym and Pistol, to the main force, wearing the king's +colours and boasting of his commission, but pillaging for themselves, +and occasionally gibbeted by the roadside. + +Well, she was hanging on the arm of Major Loder, and they went through +the rooms together, and drank a great quantity of champagne at the +buffet, where the people, and especially the Major's irregular corps, +struggled furiously for refreshments, of which when the pair had had +enough, they pushed on until they reached the Duchess's own pink velvet +saloon, at the end of the suite of apartments (where the statue of the +Venus is, and the great Venice looking-glasses, framed in silver), and +where the princely family were entertaining their most distinguished +guests at a round table at supper. It was just such a little select +banquet as that of which Becky recollected that she had partaken at +Lord Steyne's--and there he sat at Polonia's table, and she saw him. +The scar cut by the diamond on his white, bald, shining forehead made a +burning red mark; his red whiskers were dyed of a purple hue, which +made his pale face look still paler. He wore his collar and orders, +his blue ribbon and garter. He was a greater Prince than any there, +though there was a reigning Duke and a Royal Highness, with their +princesses, and near his Lordship was seated the beautiful Countess of +Belladonna, nee de Glandier, whose husband (the Count Paolo della +Belladonna), so well known for his brilliant entomological collections, +had been long absent on a mission to the Emperor of Morocco. + +When Becky beheld that familiar and illustrious face, how vulgar all of +a sudden did Major Loder appear to her, and how that odious Captain +Rook did smell of tobacco! In one instant she reassumed her +fine-ladyship and tried to look and feel as if she were in May Fair +once more. "That woman looks stupid and ill-humoured," she thought; "I +am sure she can't amuse him. No, he must be bored by her--he never was +by me." A hundred such touching hopes, fears, and memories palpitated +in her little heart, as she looked with her brightest eyes (the rouge +which she wore up to her eyelids made them twinkle) towards the great +nobleman. Of a Star and Garter night Lord Steyne used also to put on +his grandest manner and to look and speak like a great prince, as he +was. Becky admired him smiling sumptuously, easy, lofty, and stately. +Ah, bon Dieu, what a pleasant companion he was, what a brilliant wit, +what a rich fund of talk, what a grand manner!--and she had exchanged +this for Major Loder, reeking of cigars and brandy-and-water, and +Captain Rook with his horsejockey jokes and prize-ring slang, and their +like. "I wonder whether he will know me," she thought. Lord Steyne +was talking and laughing with a great and illustrious lady at his side, +when he looked up and saw Becky. + +She was all over in a flutter as their eyes met, and she put on the +very best smile she could muster, and dropped him a little, timid, +imploring curtsey. He stared aghast at her for a minute, as Macbeth +might on beholding Banquo's sudden appearance at his ball-supper, and +remained looking at her with open mouth, when that horrid Major Loder +pulled her away. + +"Come away into the supper-room, Mrs. R.," was that gentleman's remark: +"seeing these nobs grubbing away has made me peckish too. Let's go and +try the old governor's champagne." Becky thought the Major had had a +great deal too much already. + +The day after she went to walk on the Pincian Hill--the Hyde Park of +the Roman idlers--possibly in hopes to have another sight of Lord +Steyne. But she met another acquaintance there: it was Mr. Fiche, his +lordship's confidential man, who came up nodding to her rather +familiarly and putting a finger to his hat. "I knew that Madame was +here," he said; "I followed her from her hotel. I have some advice to +give Madame." + +"From the Marquis of Steyne?" Becky asked, resuming as much of her +dignity as she could muster, and not a little agitated by hope and +expectation. + +"No," said the valet; "it is from me. Rome is very unwholesome." + +"Not at this season, Monsieur Fiche--not till after Easter." + +"I tell Madame it is unwholesome now. There is always malaria for some +people. That cursed marsh wind kills many at all seasons. Look, Madame +Crawley, you were always bon enfant, and I have an interest in you, +parole d'honneur. Be warned. Go away from Rome, I tell you--or you +will be ill and die." + +Becky laughed, though in rage and fury. "What! assassinate poor little +me?" she said. "How romantic! Does my lord carry bravos for couriers, +and stilettos in the fourgons? Bah! I will stay, if but to plague him. +I have those who will defend me whilst I am here." + +It was Monsieur Fiche's turn to laugh now. "Defend you," he said, "and +who? The Major, the Captain, any one of those gambling men whom Madame +sees would take her life for a hundred louis. We know things about +Major Loder (he is no more a Major than I am my Lord the Marquis) which +would send him to the galleys or worse. We know everything and have +friends everywhere. We know whom you saw at Paris, and what relations +you found there. Yes, Madame may stare, but we do. How was it that no +minister on the Continent would receive Madame? She has offended +somebody: who never forgives--whose rage redoubled when he saw you. +He was like a madman last night when he came home. Madame de +Belladonna made him a scene about you and fired off in one of her +furies." + +"Oh, it was Madame de Belladonna, was it?" Becky said, relieved a +little, for the information she had just got had scared her. + +"No--she does not matter--she is always jealous. I tell you it was +Monseigneur. You did wrong to show yourself to him. And if you stay +here you will repent it. Mark my words. Go. Here is my lord's +carriage"--and seizing Becky's arm, he rushed down an alley of the +garden as Lord Steyne's barouche, blazing with heraldic devices, came +whirling along the avenue, borne by the almost priceless horses, and +bearing Madame de Belladonna lolling on the cushions, dark, sulky, and +blooming, a King Charles in her lap, a white parasol swaying over her +head, and old Steyne stretched at her side with a livid face and +ghastly eyes. Hate, or anger, or desire caused them to brighten now +and then still, but ordinarily, they gave no light, and seemed tired of +looking out on a world of which almost all the pleasure and all the +best beauty had palled upon the worn-out wicked old man. + +"Monseigneur has never recovered the shock of that night, never," +Monsieur Fiche whispered to Mrs. Crawley as the carriage flashed by, +and she peeped out at it from behind the shrubs that hid her. "That +was a consolation at any rate," Becky thought. + +Whether my lord really had murderous intentions towards Mrs. Becky as +Monsieur Fiche said (since Monseigneur's death he has returned to his +native country, where he lives much respected, and has purchased from +his Prince the title of Baron Ficci), and the factotum objected to have +to do with assassination; or whether he simply had a commission to +frighten Mrs. Crawley out of a city where his Lordship proposed to pass +the winter, and the sight of her would be eminently disagreeable to the +great nobleman, is a point which has never been ascertained: but the +threat had its effect upon the little woman, and she sought no more to +intrude herself upon the presence of her old patron. + +Everybody knows the melancholy end of that nobleman, which befell at +Naples two months after the French Revolution of 1830; when the Most +Honourable George Gustavus, Marquis of Steyne, Earl of Gaunt and of +Gaunt Castle, in the Peerage of Ireland, Viscount Hellborough, Baron +Pitchley and Grillsby, a Knight of the Most Noble Order of the Garter, +of the Golden Fleece of Spain, of the Russian Order of Saint Nicholas +of the First Class, of the Turkish Order of the Crescent, First Lord of +the Powder Closet and Groom of the Back Stairs, Colonel of the Gaunt or +Regent's Own Regiment of Militia, a Trustee of the British Museum, an +Elder Brother of the Trinity House, a Governor of the White Friars, and +D.C.L.--died after a series of fits brought on, as the papers said, by +the shock occasioned to his lordship's sensibilities by the downfall of +the ancient French monarchy. + +An eloquent catalogue appeared in a weekly print, describing his +virtues, his magnificence, his talents, and his good actions. His +sensibility, his attachment to the illustrious House of Bourbon, with +which he claimed an alliance, were such that he could not survive the +misfortunes of his august kinsmen. His body was buried at Naples, and +his heart--that heart which always beat with every generous and noble +emotion was brought back to Castle Gaunt in a silver urn. "In him," +Mr. Wagg said, "the poor and the Fine Arts have lost a beneficent +patron, society one of its most brilliant ornaments, and England one of +her loftiest patriots and statesmen," &c., &c. + +His will was a good deal disputed, and an attempt was made to force +from Madame de Belladonna the celebrated jewel called the "Jew's-eye" +diamond, which his lordship always wore on his forefinger, and which it +was said that she removed from it after his lamented demise. But his +confidential friend and attendant, Monsieur Fiche proved that the ring +had been presented to the said Madame de Belladonna two days before the +Marquis's death, as were the bank-notes, jewels, Neapolitan and French +bonds, &c., found in his lordship's secretaire and claimed by his heirs +from that injured woman. + + + +CHAPTER LXV + +Full of Business and Pleasure + +The day after the meeting at the play-table, Jos had himself arrayed +with unusual care and splendour, and without thinking it necessary to +say a word to any member of his family regarding the occurrences of the +previous night, or asking for their company in his walk, he sallied +forth at an early hour, and was presently seen making inquiries at the +door of the Elephant Hotel. In consequence of the fetes the house was +full of company, the tables in the street were already surrounded by +persons smoking and drinking the national small-beer, the public rooms +were in a cloud of smoke, and Mr. Jos having, in his pompous way, and +with his clumsy German, made inquiries for the person of whom he was in +search, was directed to the very top of the house, above the +first-floor rooms where some travelling pedlars had lived, and were +exhibiting their jewellery and brocades; above the second-floor +apartments occupied by the etat major of the gambling firm; above the +third-floor rooms, tenanted by the band of renowned Bohemian vaulters +and tumblers; and so on to the little cabins of the roof, where, among +students, bagmen, small tradesmen, and country-folks come in for the +festival, Becky had found a little nest--as dirty a little refuge as +ever beauty lay hid in. + +Becky liked the life. She was at home with everybody in the place, +pedlars, punters, tumblers, students and all. She was of a wild, roving +nature, inherited from father and mother, who were both Bohemians, by +taste and circumstance; if a lord was not by, she would talk to his +courier with the greatest pleasure; the din, the stir, the drink, the +smoke, the tattle of the Hebrew pedlars, the solemn, braggart ways of +the poor tumblers, the sournois talk of the gambling-table officials, +the songs and swagger of the students, and the general buzz and hum of +the place had pleased and tickled the little woman, even when her luck +was down and she had not wherewithal to pay her bill. How pleasant was +all the bustle to her now that her purse was full of the money which +little Georgy had won for her the night before! + +As Jos came creaking and puffing up the final stairs, and was +speechless when he got to the landing, and began to wipe his face and +then to look for No. 92, the room where he was directed to seek for the +person he wanted, the door of the opposite chamber, No. 90, was open, +and a student, in jack-boots and a dirty schlafrock, was lying on the +bed smoking a long pipe; whilst another student in long yellow hair and +a braided coat, exceeding smart and dirty too, was actually on his +knees at No. 92, bawling through the keyhole supplications to the +person within. + +"Go away," said a well-known voice, which made Jos thrill, "I expect +somebody; I expect my grandpapa. He mustn't see you there." + +"Angel Englanderinn!" bellowed the kneeling student with the whity-brown +ringlets and the large finger-ring, "do take compassion upon us. +Make an appointment. Dine with me and Fritz at the inn in the park. We +will have roast pheasants and porter, plum-pudding and French wine. We +shall die if you don't." + +"That we will," said the young nobleman on the bed; and this colloquy +Jos overheard, though he did not comprehend it, for the reason that he +had never studied the language in which it was carried on. + +"Newmero kattervang dooze, si vous plait," Jos said in his grandest +manner, when he was able to speak. + +"Quater fang tooce!" said the student, starting up, and he bounced into +his own room, where he locked the door, and where Jos heard him +laughing with his comrade on the bed. + +The gentleman from Bengal was standing, disconcerted by this incident, +when the door of the 92 opened of itself and Becky's little head peeped +out full of archness and mischief. She lighted on Jos. "It's you," +she said, coming out. "How I have been waiting for you! Stop! not +yet--in one minute you shall come in." In that instant she put a +rouge-pot, a brandy bottle, and a plate of broken meat into the bed, +gave one smooth to her hair, and finally let in her visitor. + +She had, by way of morning robe, a pink domino, a trifle faded and +soiled, and marked here and there with pomaturn; but her arms shone out +from the loose sleeves of the dress very white and fair, and it was +tied round her little waist so as not ill to set off the trim little +figure of the wearer. She led Jos by the hand into her garret. "Come +in," she said. "Come and talk to me. Sit yonder on the chair"; and +she gave the civilian's hand a little squeeze and laughingly placed him +upon it. As for herself, she placed herself on the bed--not on the +bottle and plate, you may be sure--on which Jos might have reposed, had +he chosen that seat; and so there she sat and talked with her old +admirer. "How little years have changed you," she said with a look of +tender interest. "I should have known you anywhere. What a comfort it +is amongst strangers to see once more the frank honest face of an old +friend!" + +The frank honest face, to tell the truth, at this moment bore any +expression but one of openness and honesty: it was, on the contrary, +much perturbed and puzzled in look. Jos was surveying the queer little +apartment in which he found his old flame. One of her gowns hung over +the bed, another depending from a hook of the door; her bonnet obscured +half the looking-glass, on which, too, lay the prettiest little pair of +bronze boots; a French novel was on the table by the bedside, with a +candle, not of wax. Becky thought of popping that into the bed too, +but she only put in the little paper night-cap with which she had put +the candle out on going to sleep. + +"I should have known you anywhere," she continued; "a woman never +forgets some things. And you were the first man I ever--I ever saw." + +"Was I really?" said Jos. "God bless my soul, you--you don't say so." + +"When I came with your sister from Chiswick, I was scarcely more than a +child," Becky said. "How is that, dear love? Oh, her husband was a sad +wicked man, and of course it was of me that the poor dear was jealous. +As if I cared about him, heigho! when there was somebody--but +no--don't let us talk of old times"; and she passed her handkerchief +with the tattered lace across her eyelids. + +"Is not this a strange place," she continued, "for a woman, who has +lived in a very different world too, to be found in? I have had so many +griefs and wrongs, Joseph Sedley; I have been made to suffer so cruelly +that I am almost made mad sometimes. I can't stay still in any place, +but wander about always restless and unhappy. All my friends have been +false to me--all. There is no such thing as an honest man in the +world. I was the truest wife that ever lived, though I married my +husband out of pique, because somebody else--but never mind that. I +was true, and he trampled upon me and deserted me. I was the fondest +mother. I had but one child, one darling, one hope, one joy, which I +held to my heart with a mother's affection, which was my life, my +prayer, my--my blessing; and they--they tore it from me--tore it from +me"; and she put her hand to her heart with a passionate gesture of +despair, burying her face for a moment on the bed. + +The brandy-bottle inside clinked up against the plate which held the +cold sausage. Both were moved, no doubt, by the exhibition of so much +grief. Max and Fritz were at the door, listening with wonder to Mrs. +Becky's sobs and cries. Jos, too, was a good deal frightened and +affected at seeing his old flame in this condition. And she began, +forthwith, to tell her story--a tale so neat, simple, and artless that +it was quite evident from hearing her that if ever there was a +white-robed angel escaped from heaven to be subject to the infernal +machinations and villainy of fiends here below, that spotless +being--that miserable unsullied martyr, was present on the bed before +Jos--on the bed, sitting on the brandy-bottle. + +They had a very long, amicable, and confidential talk there, in the +course of which Jos Sedley was somehow made aware (but in a manner that +did not in the least scare or offend him) that Becky's heart had first +learned to beat at his enchanting presence; that George Osborne had +certainly paid an unjustifiable court to HER, which might account for +Amelia's jealousy and their little rupture; but that Becky never gave +the least encouragement to the unfortunate officer, and that she had +never ceased to think about Jos from the very first day she had seen +him, though, of course, her duties as a married woman were +paramount--duties which she had always preserved, and would, to her +dying day, or until the proverbially bad climate in which Colonel +Crawley was living should release her from a yoke which his cruelty had +rendered odious to her. + +Jos went away, convinced that she was the most virtuous, as she was one +of the most fascinating of women, and revolving in his mind all sorts +of benevolent schemes for her welfare. Her persecutions ought to be +ended: she ought to return to the society of which she was an ornament. +He would see what ought to be done. She must quit that place and take +a quiet lodging. Amelia must come and see her and befriend her. He +would go and settle about it, and consult with the Major. She wept +tears of heart-felt gratitude as she parted from him, and pressed his +hand as the gallant stout gentleman stooped down to kiss hers. + +So Becky bowed Jos out of her little garret with as much grace as if it +was a palace of which she did the honours; and that heavy gentleman +having disappeared down the stairs, Max and Fritz came out of their +hole, pipe in mouth, and she amused herself by mimicking Jos to them as +she munched her cold bread and sausage and took draughts of her +favourite brandy-and-water. + +Jos walked over to Dobbin's lodgings with great solemnity and there +imparted to him the affecting history with which he had just been made +acquainted, without, however, mentioning the play business of the night +before. And the two gentlemen were laying their heads together and +consulting as to the best means of being useful to Mrs. Becky, while +she was finishing her interrupted dejeuner a la fourchette. + +How was it that she had come to that little town? How was it that she +had no friends and was wandering about alone? Little boys at school are +taught in their earliest Latin book that the path of Avernus is very +easy of descent. Let us skip over the interval in the history of her +downward progress. She was not worse now than she had been in the days +of her prosperity--only a little down on her luck. + +As for Mrs. Amelia, she was a woman of such a soft and foolish +disposition that when she heard of anybody unhappy, her heart +straightway melted towards the sufferer; and as she had never thought +or done anything mortally guilty herself, she had not that abhorrence +for wickedness which distinguishes moralists much more knowing. If she +spoiled everybody who came near her with kindness and compliments--if +she begged pardon of all her servants for troubling them to answer the +bell--if she apologized to a shopboy who showed her a piece of silk, or +made a curtsey to a street-sweeper with a complimentary remark upon +the elegant state of his crossing--and she was almost capable of every +one of these follies--the notion that an old acquaintance was +miserable was sure to soften her heart; nor would she hear of anybody's +being deservedly unhappy. A world under such legislation as hers would +not be a very orderly place of abode; but there are not many women, at +least not of the rulers, who are of her sort. This lady, I believe, +would have abolished all gaols, punishments, handcuffs, whippings, +poverty, sickness, hunger, in the world, and was such a mean-spirited +creature that--we are obliged to confess it--she could even forget a +mortal injury. + +When the Major heard from Jos of the sentimental adventure which had +just befallen the latter, he was not, it must be owned, nearly as much +interested as the gentleman from Bengal. On the contrary, his +excitement was quite the reverse from a pleasurable one; he made use of +a brief but improper expression regarding a poor woman in distress, +saying, in fact, "The little minx, has she come to light again?" He +never had had the slightest liking for her, but had heartily mistrusted +her from the very first moment when her green eyes had looked at, and +turned away from, his own. + +"That little devil brings mischief wherever she goes," the Major said +disrespectfully. "Who knows what sort of life she has been leading? +And what business has she here abroad and alone? Don't tell me about +persecutors and enemies; an honest woman always has friends and never +is separated from her family. Why has she left her husband? He may +have been disreputable and wicked, as you say. He always was. I +remember the confounded blackleg and the way in which he used to cheat +and hoodwink poor George. Wasn't there a scandal about their +separation? I think I heard something," cried out Major Dobbin, who did +not care much about gossip, and whom Jos tried in vain to convince that +Mrs. Becky was in all respects a most injured and virtuous female. + +"Well, well; let's ask Mrs. George," said that arch-diplomatist of a +Major. "Only let us go and consult her. I suppose you will allow that +she is a good judge at any rate, and knows what is right in such +matters." + +"Hm! Emmy is very well," said Jos, who did not happen to be in love +with his sister. + +"Very well? By Gad, sir, she's the finest lady I ever met in my life," +bounced out the Major. "I say at once, let us go and ask her if this +woman ought to be visited or not--I will be content with her verdict." +Now this odious, artful rogue of a Major was thinking in his own mind +that he was sure of his case. Emmy, he remembered, was at one time +cruelly and deservedly jealous of Rebecca, never mentioned her name but +with a shrinking and terror--a jealous woman never forgives, thought +Dobbin: and so the pair went across the street to Mrs. George's house, +where she was contentedly warbling at a music lesson with Madame +Strumpff. + +When that lady took her leave, Jos opened the business with his usual +pomp of words. "Amelia, my dear," said he, "I have just had the most +extraordinary--yes--God bless my soul! the most extraordinary +adventure--an old friend--yes, a most interesting old friend of yours, +and I may say in old times, has just arrived here, and I should like +you to see her." + +"Her!" said Amelia, "who is it? Major Dobbin, if you please not to +break my scissors." The Major was twirling them round by the little +chain from which they sometimes hung to their lady's waist, and was +thereby endangering his own eye. + +"It is a woman whom I dislike very much," said the Major, doggedly, "and +whom you have no cause to love." + +"It is Rebecca, I'm sure it is Rebecca," Amelia said, blushing and +being very much agitated. + +"You are right; you always are," Dobbin answered. Brussels, Waterloo, +old, old times, griefs, pangs, remembrances, rushed back into Amelia's +gentle heart and caused a cruel agitation there. + +"Don't let me see her," Emmy continued. "I couldn't see her." + +"I told you so," Dobbin said to Jos. + +"She is very unhappy, and--and that sort of thing," Jos urged. "She is +very poor and unprotected, and has been ill--exceedingly ill--and that +scoundrel of a husband has deserted her." + +"Ah!" said Amelia. + +"She hasn't a friend in the world," Jos went on, not undexterously, +"and she said she thought she might trust in you. She's so miserable, +Emmy. She has been almost mad with grief. Her story quite affected +me--'pon my word and honour, it did--never was such a cruel persecution +borne so angelically, I may say. Her family has been most cruel to +her." + +"Poor creature!" Amelia said. + +"And if she can get no friend, she says she thinks she'll die," Jos +proceeded in a low tremulous voice. "God bless my soul! do you know +that she tried to kill herself? She carries laudanum with her--I saw +the bottle in her room--such a miserable little room--at a third-rate +house, the Elephant, up in the roof at the top of all. I went there." + +This did not seem to affect Emmy. She even smiled a little. Perhaps +she figured Jos to herself panting up the stair. + +"She's beside herself with grief," he resumed. "The agonies that woman +has endured are quite frightful to hear of. She had a little boy, of +the same age as Georgy." + +"Yes, yes, I think I remember," Emmy remarked. "Well?" + +"The most beautiful child ever seen," Jos said, who was very fat, and +easily moved, and had been touched by the story Becky told; "a perfect +angel, who adored his mother. The ruffians tore him shrieking out of +her arms, and have never allowed him to see her." + +"Dear Joseph," Emmy cried out, starting up at once, "let us go and see +her this minute." And she ran into her adjoining bedchamber, tied on +her bonnet in a flutter, came out with her shawl on her arm, and +ordered Dobbin to follow. + +He went and put her shawl--it was a white cashmere, consigned to her by +the Major himself from India--over her shoulders. He saw there was +nothing for it but to obey, and she put her hand into his arm, and they +went away. + +"It is number 92, up four pair of stairs," Jos said, perhaps not very +willing to ascend the steps again; but he placed himself in the window +of his drawing-room, which commands the place on which the Elephant +stands, and saw the pair marching through the market. + +It was as well that Becky saw them too from her garret, for she and the +two students were chattering and laughing there; they had been joking +about the appearance of Becky's grandpapa--whose arrival and departure +they had witnessed--but she had time to dismiss them, and have her +little room clear before the landlord of the Elephant, who knew that +Mrs. Osborne was a great favourite at the Serene Court, and respected +her accordingly, led the way up the stairs to the roof story, +encouraging Miladi and the Herr Major as they achieved the ascent. + +"Gracious lady, gracious lady!" said the landlord, knocking at Becky's +door; he had called her Madame the day before, and was by no means +courteous to her. + +"Who is it?" Becky said, putting out her head, and she gave a little +scream. There stood Emmy in a tremble, and Dobbin, the tall Major, +with his cane. + +He stood still watching, and very much interested at the scene; but +Emmy sprang forward with open arms towards Rebecca, and forgave her at +that moment, and embraced her and kissed her with all her heart. Ah, +poor wretch, when was your lip pressed before by such pure kisses? + + + +CHAPTER LXVI + +Amantium Irae + +Frankness and kindness like Amelia's were likely to touch even such a +hardened little reprobate as Becky. She returned Emmy's caresses and +kind speeches with something very like gratitude, and an emotion which, +if it was not lasting, for a moment was almost genuine. That was a +lucky stroke of hers about the child "torn from her arms shrieking." It +was by that harrowing misfortune that Becky had won her friend back, +and it was one of the very first points, we may be certain, upon which +our poor simple little Emmy began to talk to her new-found acquaintance. + +"And so they took your darling child from you?" our simpleton cried +out. "Oh, Rebecca, my poor dear suffering friend, I know what it is to +lose a boy, and to feel for those who have lost one. But please Heaven +yours will be restored to you, as a merciful merciful Providence has +brought me back mine." + +"The child, my child? Oh, yes, my agonies were frightful," Becky owned, +not perhaps without a twinge of conscience. It jarred upon her to be +obliged to commence instantly to tell lies in reply to so much +confidence and simplicity. But that is the misfortune of beginning +with this kind of forgery. When one fib becomes due as it were, you +must forge another to take up the old acceptance; and so the stock of +your lies in circulation inevitably multiplies, and the danger of +detection increases every day. + +"My agonies," Becky continued, "were terrible (I hope she won't sit +down on the bottle) when they took him away from me; I thought I should +die; but I fortunately had a brain fever, during which my doctor gave +me up, and--and I recovered, and--and here I am, poor and friendless." + +"How old is he?" Emmy asked. + +"Eleven," said Becky. + +"Eleven!" cried the other. "Why, he was born the same year with +Georgy, who is--" + +"I know, I know," Becky cried out, who had in fact quite forgotten all +about little Rawdon's age. "Grief has made me forget so many things, +dearest Amelia. I am very much changed: half-wild sometimes. He was +eleven when they took him away from me. Bless his sweet face; I have +never seen it again." + +"Was he fair or dark?" went on that absurd little Emmy. "Show me his +hair." + +Becky almost laughed at her simplicity. "Not to-day, love--some other +time, when my trunks arrive from Leipzig, whence I came to this +place--and a little drawing of him, which I made in happy days." + +"Poor Becky, poor Becky!" said Emmy. "How thankful, how thankful I +ought to be"; (though I doubt whether that practice of piety inculcated +upon us by our womankind in early youth, namely, to be thankful because +we are better off than somebody else, be a very rational religious +exercise) and then she began to think, as usual, how her son was the +handsomest, the best, and the cleverest boy in the whole world. + +"You will see my Georgy," was the best thing Emmy could think of to +console Becky. If anything could make her comfortable that would. + +And so the two women continued talking for an hour or more, during +which Becky had the opportunity of giving her new friend a full and +complete version of her private history. She showed how her marriage +with Rawdon Crawley had always been viewed by the family with feelings +of the utmost hostility; how her sister-in-law (an artful woman) had +poisoned her husband's mind against her; how he had formed odious +connections, which had estranged his affections from her: how she had +borne everything--poverty, neglect, coldness from the being whom she +most loved--and all for the sake of her child; how, finally, and by the +most flagrant outrage, she had been driven into demanding a separation +from her husband, when the wretch did not scruple to ask that she +should sacrifice her own fair fame so that he might procure advancement +through the means of a very great and powerful but unprincipled +man--the Marquis of Steyne, indeed. The atrocious monster! + +This part of her eventful history Becky gave with the utmost feminine +delicacy and the most indignant virtue. Forced to fly her husband's +roof by this insult, the coward had pursued his revenge by taking her +child from her. And thus Becky said she was a wanderer, poor, +unprotected, friendless, and wretched. + +Emmy received this story, which was told at some length, as those +persons who are acquainted with her character may imagine that she +would. She quivered with indignation at the account of the conduct of +the miserable Rawdon and the unprincipled Steyne. Her eyes made notes +of admiration for every one of the sentences in which Becky described +the persecutions of her aristocratic relatives and the falling away of +her husband. (Becky did not abuse him. She spoke rather in sorrow than +in anger. She had loved him only too fondly: and was he not the father +of her boy?) And as for the separation scene from the child, while +Becky was reciting it, Emmy retired altogether behind her +pocket-handkerchief, so that the consummate little tragedian must have +been charmed to see the effect which her performance produced on her +audience. + +Whilst the ladies were carrying on their conversation, Amelia's +constant escort, the Major (who, of course, did not wish to interrupt +their conference, and found himself rather tired of creaking about the +narrow stair passage of which the roof brushed the nap from his hat) +descended to the ground-floor of the house and into the great room +common to all the frequenters of the Elephant, out of which the stair +led. This apartment is always in a fume of smoke and liberally +sprinkled with beer. On a dirty table stand scores of corresponding +brass candlesticks with tallow candles for the lodgers, whose keys hang +up in rows over the candles. Emmy had passed blushing through the room +anon, where all sorts of people were collected; Tyrolese glove-sellers +and Danubian linen-merchants, with their packs; students recruiting +themselves with butterbrods and meat; idlers, playing cards or dominoes +on the sloppy, beery tables; tumblers refreshing during the cessation +of their performances--in a word, all the fumum and strepitus of a +German inn in fair time. The waiter brought the Major a mug of beer, +as a matter of course, and he took out a cigar and amused himself with +that pernicious vegetable and a newspaper until his charge should come +down to claim him. + +Max and Fritz came presently downstairs, their caps on one side, their +spurs jingling, their pipes splendid with coats of arms and full-blown +tassels, and they hung up the key of No. 90 on the board and called for +the ration of butterbrod and beer. The pair sat down by the Major and +fell into a conversation of which he could not help hearing somewhat. +It was mainly about "Fuchs" and "Philister," and duels and +drinking-bouts at the neighbouring University of Schoppenhausen, from +which renowned seat of learning they had just come in the Eilwagen, +with Becky, as it appeared, by their side, and in order to be present +at the bridal fetes at Pumpernickel. + +"The title Englanderinn seems to be en bays de gonnoisance," said Max, +who knew the French language, to Fritz, his comrade. "After the fat +grandfather went away, there came a pretty little compatriot. I heard +them chattering and whimpering together in the little woman's chamber." + +"We must take the tickets for her concert," Fritz said. "Hast thou any +money, Max?" + +"Bah," said the other, "the concert is a concert in nubibus. Hans said +that she advertised one at Leipzig, and the Burschen took many tickets. +But she went off without singing. She said in the coach yesterday that +her pianist had fallen ill at Dresden. She cannot sing, it is my +belief: her voice is as cracked as thine, O thou beer-soaking Renowner!" + +"It is cracked; I hear her trying out of her window a schrecklich +English ballad, called 'De Rose upon de Balgony.'" + +"Saufen and singen go not together," observed Fritz with the red nose, +who evidently preferred the former amusement. "No, thou shalt take +none of her tickets. She won money at the trente and quarante last +night. I saw her: she made a little English boy play for her. We will +spend thy money there or at the theatre, or we will treat her to French +wine or Cognac in the Aurelius Garden, but the tickets we will not buy. +What sayest thou? Yet, another mug of beer?" and one and another +successively having buried their blond whiskers in the mawkish draught, +curled them and swaggered off into the fair. + +The Major, who had seen the key of No. 90 put up on its hook and had +heard the conversation of the two young University bloods, was not at a +loss to understand that their talk related to Becky. "The little devil +is at her old tricks," he thought, and he smiled as he recalled old +days, when he had witnessed the desperate flirtation with Jos and the +ludicrous end of that adventure. He and George had often laughed over +it subsequently, and until a few weeks after George's marriage, when he +also was caught in the little Circe's toils, and had an understanding +with her which his comrade certainly suspected, but preferred to +ignore. William was too much hurt or ashamed to ask to fathom that +disgraceful mystery, although once, and evidently with remorse on his +mind, George had alluded to it. It was on the morning of Waterloo, as +the young men stood together in front of their line, surveying the +black masses of Frenchmen who crowned the opposite heights, and as the +rain was coming down, "I have been mixing in a foolish intrigue with a +woman," George said. "I am glad we were marched away. If I drop, I +hope Emmy will never know of that business. I wish to God it had never +been begun!" And William was pleased to think, and had more than once +soothed poor George's widow with the narrative, that Osborne, after +quitting his wife, and after the action of Quatre Bras, on the first +day, spoke gravely and affectionately to his comrade of his father and +his wife. On these facts, too, William had insisted very strongly in +his conversations with the elder Osborne, and had thus been the means +of reconciling the old gentleman to his son's memory, just at the close +of the elder man's life. + +"And so this devil is still going on with her intrigues," thought +William. "I wish she were a hundred miles from here. She brings +mischief wherever she goes." And he was pursuing these forebodings and +this uncomfortable train of thought, with his head between his hands, +and the Pumpernickel Gazette of last week unread under his nose, when +somebody tapped his shoulder with a parasol, and he looked up and saw +Mrs. Amelia. + +This woman had a way of tyrannizing over Major Dobbin (for the weakest +of all people will domineer over somebody), and she ordered him about, +and patted him, and made him fetch and carry just as if he was a great +Newfoundland dog. He liked, so to speak, to jump into the water if she +said "High, Dobbin!" and to trot behind her with her reticule in his +mouth. This history has been written to very little purpose if the +reader has not perceived that the Major was a spooney. + +"Why did you not wait for me, sir, to escort me downstairs?" she said, +giving a little toss of her head and a most sarcastic curtsey. + +"I couldn't stand up in the passage," he answered with a comical +deprecatory look; and, delighted to give her his arm and to take her +out of the horrid smoky place, he would have walked off without even so +much as remembering the waiter, had not the young fellow run after him +and stopped him on the threshold of the Elephant to make him pay for +the beer which he had not consumed. Emmy laughed: she called him a +naughty man, who wanted to run away in debt, and, in fact, made some +jokes suitable to the occasion and the small-beer. She was in high +spirits and good humour, and tripped across the market-place very +briskly. She wanted to see Jos that instant. The Major laughed at the +impetuous affection Mrs. Amelia exhibited; for, in truth, it was not +very often that she wanted her brother "that instant." They found the +civilian in his saloon on the first-floor; he had been pacing the room, +and biting his nails, and looking over the market-place towards the +Elephant a hundred times at least during the past hour whilst Emmy was +closeted with her friend in the garret and the Major was beating the +tattoo on the sloppy tables of the public room below, and he was, on +his side too, very anxious to see Mrs. Osborne. + +"Well?" said he. + +"The poor dear creature, how she has suffered!" Emmy said. + +"God bless my soul, yes," Jos said, wagging his head, so that his +cheeks quivered like jellies. + +"She may have Payne's room, who can go upstairs," Emmy continued. Payne +was a staid English maid and personal attendant upon Mrs. Osborne, to +whom the courier, as in duty bound, paid court, and whom Georgy used to +"lark" dreadfully with accounts of German robbers and ghosts. She +passed her time chiefly in grumbling, in ordering about her mistress, +and in stating her intention to return the next morning to her native +village of Clapham. "She may have Payne's room," Emmy said. + +"Why, you don't mean to say you are going to have that woman into the +house?" bounced out the Major, jumping up. + +"Of course we are," said Amelia in the most innocent way in the world. +"Don't be angry and break the furniture, Major Dobbin. Of course we +are going to have her here." + +"Of course, my dear," Jos said. + +"The poor creature, after all her sufferings," Emmy continued; "her +horrid banker broken and run away; her husband--wicked wretch--having +deserted her and taken her child away from her" (here she doubled her +two little fists and held them in a most menacing attitude before her, +so that the Major was charmed to see such a dauntless virago) "the poor +dear thing! quite alone and absolutely forced to give lessons in +singing to get her bread--and not have her here!" + +"Take lessons, my dear Mrs. George," cried the Major, "but don't have +her in the house. I implore you don't." + +"Pooh," said Jos. + +"You who are always good and kind--always used to be at any rate--I'm +astonished at you, Major William," Amelia cried. "Why, what is the +moment to help her but when she is so miserable? Now is the time to be +of service to her. The oldest friend I ever had, and not--" + +"She was not always your friend, Amelia," the Major said, for he was +quite angry. This allusion was too much for Emmy, who, looking the +Major almost fiercely in the face, said, "For shame, Major Dobbin!" and +after having fired this shot, she walked out of the room with a most +majestic air and shut her own door briskly on herself and her outraged +dignity. + +"To allude to THAT!" she said, when the door was closed. "Oh, it was +cruel of him to remind me of it," and she looked up at George's +picture, which hung there as usual, with the portrait of the boy +underneath. "It was cruel of him. If I had forgiven it, ought he to +have spoken? No. And it is from his own lips that I know how wicked +and groundless my jealousy was; and that you were pure--oh, yes, you +were pure, my saint in heaven!" + +She paced the room, trembling and indignant. She went and leaned on +the chest of drawers over which the picture hung, and gazed and gazed +at it. Its eyes seemed to look down on her with a reproach that +deepened as she looked. The early dear, dear memories of that brief +prime of love rushed back upon her. The wound which years had scarcely +cicatrized bled afresh, and oh, how bitterly! She could not bear the +reproaches of the husband there before her. It couldn't be. Never, +never. + +Poor Dobbin; poor old William! That unlucky word had undone the work +of many a year--the long laborious edifice of a life of love and +constancy--raised too upon what secret and hidden foundations, wherein +lay buried passions, uncounted struggles, unknown sacrifices--a little +word was spoken, and down fell the fair palace of hope--one word, and +away flew the bird which he had been trying all his life to lure! + +William, though he saw by Amelia's looks that a great crisis had come, +nevertheless continued to implore Sedley, in the most energetic terms, +to beware of Rebecca; and he eagerly, almost frantically, adjured Jos +not to receive her. He besought Mr. Sedley to inquire at least +regarding her; told him how he had heard that she was in the company of +gamblers and people of ill repute; pointed out what evil she had done +in former days, how she and Crawley had misled poor George into ruin, +how she was now parted from her husband, by her own confession, and, +perhaps, for good reason. What a dangerous companion she would be for +his sister, who knew nothing of the affairs of the world! William +implored Jos, with all the eloquence which he could bring to bear, and +a great deal more energy than this quiet gentleman was ordinarily in +the habit of showing, to keep Rebecca out of his household. + +Had he been less violent, or more dexterous, he might have succeeded in +his supplications to Jos; but the civilian was not a little jealous of +the airs of superiority which the Major constantly exhibited towards +him, as he fancied (indeed, he had imparted his opinions to Mr. Kirsch, +the courier, whose bills Major Dobbin checked on this journey, and who +sided with his master), and he began a blustering speech about his +competency to defend his own honour, his desire not to have his affairs +meddled with, his intention, in fine, to rebel against the Major, when +the colloquy--rather a long and stormy one--was put an end to in the +simplest way possible, namely, by the arrival of Mrs. Becky, with a +porter from the Elephant Hotel in charge of her very meagre baggage. + +She greeted her host with affectionate respect and made a shrinking, +but amicable salutation to Major Dobbin, who, as her instinct assured +her at once, was her enemy, and had been speaking against her; and the +bustle and clatter consequent upon her arrival brought Amelia out of +her room. Emmy went up and embraced her guest with the greatest +warmth, and took no notice of the Major, except to fling him an angry +look--the most unjust and scornful glance that had perhaps ever +appeared in that poor little woman's face since she was born. But she +had private reasons of her own, and was bent upon being angry with him. +And Dobbin, indignant at the injustice, not at the defeat, went off, +making her a bow quite as haughty as the killing curtsey with which the +little woman chose to bid him farewell. + +He being gone, Emmy was particularly lively and affectionate to +Rebecca, and bustled about the apartments and installed her guest in +her room with an eagerness and activity seldom exhibited by our placid +little friend. But when an act of injustice is to be done, especially +by weak people, it is best that it should be done quickly, and Emmy +thought she was displaying a great deal of firmness and proper feeling +and veneration for the late Captain Osborne in her present behaviour. + +Georgy came in from the fetes for dinner-time and found four covers +laid as usual; but one of the places was occupied by a lady, instead of +by Major Dobbin. "Hullo! where's Dob?" the young gentleman asked with +his usual simplicity of language. "Major Dobbin is dining out, I +suppose," his mother said, and, drawing the boy to her, kissed him a +great deal, and put his hair off his forehead, and introduced him to +Mrs. Crawley. "This is my boy, Rebecca," Mrs. Osborne said--as much as +to say--can the world produce anything like that? Becky looked at him +with rapture and pressed his hand fondly. "Dear boy!" she said--"he is +just like my--" Emotion choked her further utterance, but Amelia +understood, as well as if she had spoken, that Becky was thinking of +her own blessed child. However, the company of her friend consoled +Mrs. Crawley, and she ate a very good dinner. + +During the repast, she had occasion to speak several times, when Georgy +eyed her and listened to her. At the desert Emmy was gone out to +superintend further domestic arrangements; Jos was in his great chair +dozing over Galignani; Georgy and the new arrival sat close to each +other--he had continued to look at her knowingly more than once, and at +last he laid down the nutcrackers. + +"I say," said Georgy. + +"What do you say?" Becky said, laughing. + +"You're the lady I saw in the mask at the Rouge et Noir." + +"Hush! you little sly creature," Becky said, taking up his hand and +kissing it. "Your uncle was there too, and Mamma mustn't know." + +"Oh, no--not by no means," answered the little fellow. + +"You see we are quite good friends already," Becky said to Emmy, who +now re-entered; and it must be owned that Mrs. Osborne had introduced a +most judicious and amiable companion into her house. + +William, in a state of great indignation, though still unaware of all +the treason that was in store for him, walked about the town wildly +until he fell upon the Secretary of Legation, Tapeworm, who invited him +to dinner. As they were discussing that meal, he took occasion to ask +the Secretary whether he knew anything about a certain Mrs. Rawdon +Crawley, who had, he believed, made some noise in London; and then +Tapeworm, who of course knew all the London gossip, and was besides a +relative of Lady Gaunt, poured out into the astonished Major's ears +such a history about Becky and her husband as astonished the querist, +and supplied all the points of this narrative, for it was at that very +table years ago that the present writer had the pleasure of hearing the +tale. Tufto, Steyne, the Crawleys, and their history--everything +connected with Becky and her previous life passed under the record of +the bitter diplomatist. He knew everything and a great deal besides, +about all the world--in a word, he made the most astounding revelations +to the simple-hearted Major. When Dobbin said that Mrs. Osborne and +Mr. Sedley had taken her into their house, Tapeworm burst into a peal +of laughter which shocked the Major, and asked if they had not better +send into the prison and take in one or two of the gentlemen in shaved +heads and yellow jackets who swept the streets of Pumpernickel, chained +in pairs, to board and lodge, and act as tutor to that little +scapegrace Georgy. + +This information astonished and horrified the Major not a little. It +had been agreed in the morning (before meeting with Rebecca) that +Amelia should go to the Court ball that night. There would be the +place where he should tell her. The Major went home, and dressed +himself in his uniform, and repaired to Court, in hopes to see Mrs. +Osborne. She never came. When he returned to his lodgings all the +lights in the Sedley tenement were put out. He could not see her till +the morning. I don't know what sort of a night's rest he had with this +frightful secret in bed with him. + +At the earliest convenient hour in the morning he sent his servant +across the way with a note, saying that he wished very particularly to +speak with her. A message came back to say that Mrs. Osborne was +exceedingly unwell and was keeping her room. + +She, too, had been awake all that night. She had been thinking of a +thing which had agitated her mind a hundred times before. A hundred +times on the point of yielding, she had shrunk back from a sacrifice +which she felt was too much for her. She couldn't, in spite of his +love and constancy and her own acknowledged regard, respect, and +gratitude. What are benefits, what is constancy, or merit? One curl of +a girl's ringlet, one hair of a whisker, will turn the scale against +them all in a minute. They did not weigh with Emmy more than with other +women. She had tried them; wanted to make them pass; could not; and +the pitiless little woman had found a pretext, and determined to be +free. + +When at length, in the afternoon, the Major gained admission to Amelia, +instead of the cordial and affectionate greeting, to which he had been +accustomed now for many a long day, he received the salutation of a +curtsey, and of a little gloved hand, retracted the moment after it was +accorded to him. + +Rebecca, too, was in the room, and advanced to meet him with a smile +and an extended hand. Dobbin drew back rather confusedly, "I--I beg +your pardon, m'am," he said; "but I am bound to tell you that it is not +as your friend that I am come here now." + +"Pooh! damn; don't let us have this sort of thing!" Jos cried out, +alarmed, and anxious to get rid of a scene. + +"I wonder what Major Dobbin has to say against Rebecca?" Amelia said in +a low, clear voice with a slight quiver in it, and a very determined +look about the eyes. + +"I will not have this sort of thing in my house," Jos again interposed. +"I say I will not have it; and Dobbin, I beg, sir, you'll stop it." And +he looked round, trembling and turning very red, and gave a great puff, +and made for his door. + +"Dear friend!" Rebecca said with angelic sweetness, "do hear what Major +Dobbin has to say against me." + +"I will not hear it, I say," squeaked out Jos at the top of his voice, +and, gathering up his dressing-gown, he was gone. + +"We are only two women," Amelia said. "You can speak now, sir." + +"This manner towards me is one which scarcely becomes you, Amelia," the +Major answered haughtily; "nor I believe am I guilty of habitual +harshness to women. It is not a pleasure to me to do the duty which I +am come to do." + +"Pray proceed with it quickly, if you please, Major Dobbin," said +Amelia, who was more and more in a pet. The expression of Dobbin's +face, as she spoke in this imperious manner, was not pleasant. + +"I came to say--and as you stay, Mrs. Crawley, I must say it in your +presence--that I think you--you ought not to form a member of the +family of my friends. A lady who is separated from her husband, who +travels not under her own name, who frequents public gaming-tables--" + +"It was to the ball I went," cried out Becky. + +"--is not a fit companion for Mrs. Osborne and her son," Dobbin went +on: "and I may add that there are people here who know you, and who +profess to know that regarding your conduct about which I don't even +wish to speak before--before Mrs. Osborne." + +"Yours is a very modest and convenient sort of calumny, Major Dobbin," +Rebecca said. "You leave me under the weight of an accusation which, +after all, is unsaid. What is it? Is it unfaithfulness to my husband? I +scorn it and defy anybody to prove it--I defy you, I say. My honour is +as untouched as that of the bitterest enemy who ever maligned me. Is +it of being poor, forsaken, wretched, that you accuse me? Yes, I am +guilty of those faults, and punished for them every day. Let me go, +Emmy. It is only to suppose that I have not met you, and I am no worse +to-day than I was yesterday. It is only to suppose that the night is +over and the poor wanderer is on her way. Don't you remember the song +we used to sing in old, dear old days? I have been wandering ever since +then--a poor castaway, scorned for being miserable, and insulted +because I am alone. Let me go: my stay here interferes with the plans +of this gentleman." + +"Indeed it does, madam," said the Major. "If I have any authority in +this house--" + +"Authority, none!" broke out Amelia. "Rebecca, you stay with me. I +won't desert you because you have been persecuted, or insult you +because--because Major Dobbin chooses to do so. Come away, dear." And +the two women made towards the door. + +William opened it. As they were going out, however, he took Amelia's +hand and said--"Will you stay a moment and speak to me?" + +"He wishes to speak to you away from me," said Becky, looking like a +martyr. Amelia gripped her hand in reply. + +"Upon my honour it is not about you that I am going to speak," Dobbin +said. "Come back, Amelia," and she came. Dobbin bowed to Mrs. +Crawley, as he shut the door upon her. Amelia looked at him, leaning +against the glass: her face and her lips were quite white. + +"I was confused when I spoke just now," the Major said after a pause, +"and I misused the word authority." + +"You did," said Amelia with her teeth chattering. + +"At least I have claims to be heard," Dobbin continued. + +"It is generous to remind me of our obligations to you," the woman +answered. + +"The claims I mean are those left me by George's father," William said. + +"Yes, and you insulted his memory. You did yesterday. You know you +did. And I will never forgive you. Never!" said Amelia. She shot out +each little sentence in a tremor of anger and emotion. + +"You don't mean that, Amelia?" William said sadly. "You don't mean that +these words, uttered in a hurried moment, are to weigh against a whole +life's devotion? I think that George's memory has not been injured by +the way in which I have dealt with it, and if we are come to bandying +reproaches, I at least merit none from his widow and the mother of his +son. Reflect, afterwards when--when you are at leisure, and your +conscience will withdraw this accusation. It does even now." Amelia +held down her head. + +"It is not that speech of yesterday," he continued, "which moves you. +That is but the pretext, Amelia, or I have loved you and watched you +for fifteen years in vain. Have I not learned in that time to read all +your feelings and look into your thoughts? I know what your heart is +capable of: it can cling faithfully to a recollection and cherish a +fancy, but it can't feel such an attachment as mine deserves to mate +with, and such as I would have won from a woman more generous than you. +No, you are not worthy of the love which I have devoted to you. I knew +all along that the prize I had set my life on was not worth the +winning; that I was a fool, with fond fancies, too, bartering away my +all of truth and ardour against your little feeble remnant of love. I +will bargain no more: I withdraw. I find no fault with you. You are +very good-natured, and have done your best, but you couldn't--you +couldn't reach up to the height of the attachment which I bore you, and +which a loftier soul than yours might have been proud to share. +Good-bye, Amelia! I have watched your struggle. Let it end. We are +both weary of it." + +Amelia stood scared and silent as William thus suddenly broke the chain +by which she held him and declared his independence and superiority. +He had placed himself at her feet so long that the poor little woman +had been accustomed to trample upon him. She didn't wish to marry him, +but she wished to keep him. She wished to give him nothing, but that +he should give her all. It is a bargain not unfrequently levied in +love. + +William's sally had quite broken and cast her down. HER assault was +long since over and beaten back. + +"Am I to understand then, that you are going--away, William?" she said. + +He gave a sad laugh. "I went once before," he said, "and came back +after twelve years. We were young then, Amelia. Good-bye. I have +spent enough of my life at this play." + +Whilst they had been talking, the door into Mrs. Osborne's room had +opened ever so little; indeed, Becky had kept a hold of the handle and +had turned it on the instant when Dobbin quitted it, and she heard +every word of the conversation that had passed between these two. "What +a noble heart that man has," she thought, "and how shamefully that +woman plays with it!" She admired Dobbin; she bore him no rancour for +the part he had taken against her. It was an open move in the game, +and played fairly. "Ah!" she thought, "if I could have had such a +husband as that--a man with a heart and brains too! I would not have +minded his large feet"; and running into her room, she absolutely +bethought herself of something, and wrote him a note, beseeching him to +stop for a few days--not to think of going--and that she could serve +him with A. + +The parting was over. Once more poor William walked to the door and +was gone; and the little widow, the author of all this work, had her +will, and had won her victory, and was left to enjoy it as she best +might. Let the ladies envy her triumph. + +At the romantic hour of dinner, Mr. Georgy made his appearance and +again remarked the absence of "Old Dob." The meal was eaten in silence +by the party. Jos's appetite not being diminished, but Emmy taking +nothing at all. + +After the meal, Georgy was lolling in the cushions of the old window, a +large window, with three sides of glass abutting from the gable, and +commanding on one side the market-place, where the Elephant is, his +mother being busy hard by, when he remarked symptoms of movement at the +Major's house on the other side of the street. + +"Hullo!" said he, "there's Dob's trap--they are bringing it out of the +court-yard." The "trap" in question was a carriage which the Major had +bought for six pounds sterling, and about which they used to rally him +a good deal. + +Emmy gave a little start, but said nothing. + +"Hullo!" Georgy continued, "there's Francis coming out with the +portmanteaus, and Kunz, the one-eyed postilion, coming down the market +with three schimmels. Look at his boots and yellow jacket--ain't he a +rum one? Why--they're putting the horses to Dob's carriage. Is he going +anywhere?" + +"Yes," said Emmy, "he is going on a journey." + +"Going on a journey; and when is he coming back?" + +"He is--not coming back," answered Emmy. + +"Not coming back!" cried out Georgy, jumping up. "Stay here, sir," +roared out Jos. "Stay, Georgy," said his mother with a very sad face. +The boy stopped, kicked about the room, jumped up and down from the +window-seat with his knees, and showed every symptom of uneasiness and +curiosity. + +The horses were put to. The baggage was strapped on. Francis came out +with his master's sword, cane, and umbrella tied up together, and laid +them in the well, and his desk and old tin cocked-hat case, which he +placed under the seat. Francis brought out the stained old blue cloak +lined with red camlet, which had wrapped the owner up any time these +fifteen years, and had manchen Sturm erlebt, as a favourite song of +those days said. It had been new for the campaign of Waterloo and had +covered George and William after the night of Quatre Bras. + +Old Burcke, the landlord of the lodgings, came out, then Francis, with +more packages--final packages--then Major William--Burcke wanted to +kiss him. The Major was adored by all people with whom he had to do. +It was with difficulty he could escape from this demonstration of +attachment. + +"By Jove, I will go!" screamed out George. "Give him this," said +Becky, quite interested, and put a paper into the boy's hand. He had +rushed down the stairs and flung across the street in a minute--the +yellow postilion was cracking his whip gently. + +William had got into the carriage, released from the embraces of his +landlord. George bounded in afterwards, and flung his arms round the +Major's neck (as they saw from the window), and began asking him +multiplied questions. Then he felt in his waistcoat pocket and gave +him a note. William seized at it rather eagerly, he opened it +trembling, but instantly his countenance changed, and he tore the paper +in two and dropped it out of the carriage. He kissed Georgy on the +head, and the boy got out, doubling his fists into his eyes, and with +the aid of Francis. He lingered with his hand on the panel. Fort, +Schwager! The yellow postilion cracked his whip prodigiously, up +sprang Francis to the box, away went the schimmels, and Dobbin with his +head on his breast. He never looked up as they passed under Amelia's +window, and Georgy, left alone in the street, burst out crying in the +face of all the crowd. + +Emmy's maid heard him howling again during the night and brought him +some preserved apricots to console him. She mingled her lamentations +with his. All the poor, all the humble, all honest folks, all good men +who knew him, loved that kind-hearted and simple gentleman. + +As for Emmy, had she not done her duty? She had her picture of George +for a consolation. + + + +CHAPTER LXVII + +Which Contains Births, Marriages, and Deaths + +Whatever Becky's private plan might be by which Dobbin's true love was +to be crowned with success, the little woman thought that the secret +might keep, and indeed, being by no means so much interested about +anybody's welfare as about her own, she had a great number of things +pertaining to herself to consider, and which concerned her a great deal +more than Major Dobbin's happiness in this life. + +She found herself suddenly and unexpectedly in snug comfortable +quarters, surrounded by friends, kindness, and good-natured simple +people such as she had not met with for many a long day; and, wanderer +as she was by force and inclination, there were moments when rest was +pleasant to her. As the most hardened Arab that ever careered across +the desert over the hump of a dromedary likes to repose sometimes under +the date-trees by the water, or to come into the cities, walk into the +bazaars, refresh himself in the baths, and say his prayers in the +mosques, before he goes out again marauding, so Jos's tents and pilau +were pleasant to this little Ishmaelite. She picketed her steed, hung +up her weapons, and warmed herself comfortably by his fire. The halt +in that roving, restless life was inexpressibly soothing and pleasant +to her. + +So, pleased herself, she tried with all her might to please everybody; +and we know that she was eminent and successful as a practitioner in +the art of giving pleasure. As for Jos, even in that little interview +in the garret at the Elephant Inn, she had found means to win back a +great deal of his good-will. In the course of a week, the civilian was +her sworn slave and frantic admirer. He didn't go to sleep after +dinner, as his custom was in the much less lively society of Amelia. +He drove out with Becky in his open carriage. He asked little parties +and invented festivities to do her honour. + +Tapeworm, the Charge d'Affaires, who had abused her so cruelly, came to +dine with Jos, and then came every day to pay his respects to Becky. +Poor Emmy, who was never very talkative, and more glum and silent than +ever after Dobbin's departure, was quite forgotten when this superior +genius made her appearance. The French Minister was as much charmed +with her as his English rival. The German ladies, never particularly +squeamish as regards morals, especially in English people, were +delighted with the cleverness and wit of Mrs. Osborne's charming +friend, and though she did not ask to go to Court, yet the most august +and Transparent Personages there heard of her fascinations and were +quite curious to know her. When it became known that she was noble, of +an ancient English family, that her husband was a Colonel of the Guard, +Excellenz and Governor of an island, only separated from his lady by +one of those trifling differences which are of little account in a +country where Werther is still read and the Wahlverwandtschaften of +Goethe is considered an edifying moral book, nobody thought of refusing +to receive her in the very highest society of the little Duchy; and the +ladies were even more ready to call her du and to swear eternal +friendship for her than they had been to bestow the same inestimable +benefits upon Amelia. Love and Liberty are interpreted by those simple +Germans in a way which honest folks in Yorkshire and Somersetshire +little understand, and a lady might, in some philosophic and civilized +towns, be divorced ever so many times from her respective husbands and +keep her character in society. Jos's house never was so pleasant since +he had a house of his own as Rebecca caused it to be. She sang, she +played, she laughed, she talked in two or three languages, she brought +everybody to the house, and she made Jos believe that it was his own +great social talents and wit which gathered the society of the place +round about him. + +As for Emmy, who found herself not in the least mistress of her own +house, except when the bills were to be paid, Becky soon discovered the +way to soothe and please her. She talked to her perpetually about +Major Dobbin sent about his business, and made no scruple of declaring +her admiration for that excellent, high-minded gentleman, and of +telling Emmy that she had behaved most cruelly regarding him. Emmy +defended her conduct and showed that it was dictated only by the purest +religious principles; that a woman once, &c., and to such an angel as +him whom she had had the good fortune to marry, was married forever; +but she had no objection to hear the Major praised as much as ever +Becky chose to praise him, and indeed, brought the conversation round +to the Dobbin subject a score of times every day. + +Means were easily found to win the favour of Georgy and the servants. +Amelia's maid, it has been said, was heart and soul in favour of the +generous Major. Having at first disliked Becky for being the means of +dismissing him from the presence of her mistress, she was reconciled to +Mrs. Crawley subsequently, because the latter became William's most +ardent admirer and champion. And in those nightly conclaves in which +the two ladies indulged after their parties, and while Miss Payne was +"brushing their 'airs," as she called the yellow locks of the one and +the soft brown tresses of the other, this girl always put in her word +for that dear good gentleman Major Dobbin. Her advocacy did not make +Amelia angry any more than Rebecca's admiration of him. She made +George write to him constantly and persisted in sending Mamma's kind +love in a postscript. And as she looked at her husband's portrait of +nights, it no longer reproached her--perhaps she reproached it, now +William was gone. + +Emmy was not very happy after her heroic sacrifice. She was very +distraite, nervous, silent, and ill to please. The family had never +known her so peevish. She grew pale and ill. She used to try to sing +certain songs ("Einsam bin ich nicht alleine," was one of them, that +tender love-song of Weber's which in old-fashioned days, young ladies, +and when you were scarcely born, showed that those who lived before you +knew too how to love and to sing) certain songs, I say, to which the +Major was partial; and as she warbled them in the twilight in the +drawing-room, she would break off in the midst of the song, and walk +into her neighbouring apartment, and there, no doubt, take refuge in +the miniature of her husband. + +Some books still subsisted, after Dobbin's departure, with his name +written in them; a German dictionary, for instance, with "William +Dobbin, --th Reg.," in the fly-leaf; a guide-book with his initials; +and one or two other volumes which belonged to the Major. Emmy cleared +these away and put them on the drawers, where she placed her work-box, +her desk, her Bible, and prayer-book, under the pictures of the two +Georges. And the Major, on going away, having left his gloves behind +him, it is a fact that Georgy, rummaging his mother's desk some time +afterwards, found the gloves neatly folded up and put away in what they +call the secret-drawers of the desk. + +Not caring for society, and moping there a great deal, Emmy's chief +pleasure in the summer evenings was to take long walks with Georgy +(during which Rebecca was left to the society of Mr. Joseph), and then +the mother and son used to talk about the Major in a way which even +made the boy smile. She told him that she thought Major William was +the best man in all the world--the gentlest and the kindest, the +bravest and the humblest. Over and over again she told him how they +owed everything which they possessed in the world to that kind friend's +benevolent care of them; how he had befriended them all through their +poverty and misfortunes; watched over them when nobody cared for them; +how all his comrades admired him though he never spoke of his own +gallant actions; how Georgy's father trusted him beyond all other men, +and had been constantly befriended by the good William. "Why, when +your papa was a little boy," she said, "he often told me that it was +William who defended him against a tyrant at the school where they +were; and their friendship never ceased from that day until the last, +when your dear father fell." + +"Did Dobbin kill the man who killed Papa?" Georgy said. "I'm sure he +did, or he would if he could have caught him, wouldn't he, Mother? When +I'm in the Army, won't I hate the French?--that's all." + +In such colloquies the mother and the child passed a great deal of +their time together. The artless woman had made a confidant of the +boy. He was as much William's friend as everybody else who knew him +well. + +By the way, Mrs. Becky, not to be behind hand in sentiment, had got a +miniature too hanging up in her room, to the surprise and amusement of +most people, and the delight of the original, who was no other than our +friend Jos. On her first coming to favour the Sedleys with a visit, +the little woman, who had arrived with a remarkably small shabby kit, +was perhaps ashamed of the meanness of her trunks and bandboxes, and +often spoke with great respect about her baggage left behind at +Leipzig, which she must have from that city. When a traveller talks to +you perpetually about the splendour of his luggage, which he does not +happen to have with him, my son, beware of that traveller! He is, ten +to one, an impostor. + +Neither Jos nor Emmy knew this important maxim. It seemed to them of +no consequence whether Becky had a quantity of very fine clothes in +invisible trunks; but as her present supply was exceedingly shabby, +Emmy supplied her out of her own stores, or took her to the best +milliner in the town and there fitted her out. It was no more torn +collars now, I promise you, and faded silks trailing off at the +shoulder. Becky changed her habits with her situation in life--the +rouge-pot was suspended--another excitement to which she had accustomed +herself was also put aside, or at least only indulged in in privacy, as +when she was prevailed on by Jos of a summer evening, Emmy and the boy +being absent on their walks, to take a little spirit-and-water. But if +she did not indulge--the courier did: that rascal Kirsch could not be +kept from the bottle, nor could he tell how much he took when he +applied to it. He was sometimes surprised himself at the way in which +Mr. Sedley's Cognac diminished. Well, well, this is a painful subject. +Becky did not very likely indulge so much as she used before she +entered a decorous family. + +At last the much-bragged-about boxes arrived from Leipzig; three of +them not by any means large or splendid; nor did Becky appear to take +out any sort of dresses or ornaments from the boxes when they did +arrive. But out of one, which contained a mass of her papers (it was +that very box which Rawdon Crawley had ransacked in his furious hunt +for Becky's concealed money), she took a picture with great glee, which +she pinned up in her room, and to which she introduced Jos. It was the +portrait of a gentleman in pencil, his face having the advantage of +being painted up in pink. He was riding on an elephant away from some +cocoa-nut trees and a pagoda: it was an Eastern scene. + +"God bless my soul, it is my portrait," Jos cried out. It was he +indeed, blooming in youth and beauty, in a nankeen jacket of the cut of +1804. It was the old picture that used to hang up in Russell Square. + +"I bought it," said Becky in a voice trembling with emotion; "I went to +see if I could be of any use to my kind friends. I have never parted +with that picture--I never will." + +"Won't you?" Jos cried with a look of unutterable rapture and +satisfaction. "Did you really now value it for my sake?" + +"You know I did, well enough," said Becky; "but why speak--why +think--why look back! It is too late now!" + +That evening's conversation was delicious for Jos. Emmy only came in to +go to bed very tired and unwell. Jos and his fair guest had a charming +tete-a-tete, and his sister could hear, as she lay awake in her +adjoining chamber, Rebecca singing over to Jos the old songs of 1815. +He did not sleep, for a wonder, that night, any more than Amelia. + +It was June, and, by consequence, high season in London; Jos, who read +the incomparable Galignani (the exile's best friend) through every day, +used to favour the ladies with extracts from his paper during their +breakfast. Every week in this paper there is a full account of +military movements, in which Jos, as a man who had seen service, was +especially interested. On one occasion he read out--"Arrival of the +--th regiment. Gravesend, June 20.--The Ramchunder, East Indiaman, +came into the river this morning, having on board 14 officers, and 132 +rank and file of this gallant corps. They have been absent from +England fourteen years, having been embarked the year after Waterloo, +in which glorious conflict they took an active part, and having +subsequently distinguished themselves in the Burmese war. The veteran +colonel, Sir Michael O'Dowd, K.C.B., with his lady and sister, landed +here yesterday, with Captains Posky, Stubble, Macraw, Malony; +Lieutenants Smith, Jones, Thompson, F. Thomson; Ensigns Hicks and +Grady; the band on the pier playing the national anthem, and the crowd +loudly cheering the gallant veterans as they went into Wayte's hotel, +where a sumptuous banquet was provided for the defenders of Old +England. During the repast, which we need not say was served up in +Wayte's best style, the cheering continued so enthusiastically that +Lady O'Dowd and the Colonel came forward to the balcony and drank the +healths of their fellow-countrymen in a bumper of Wayte's best claret." + +On a second occasion Jos read a brief announcement--Major Dobbin had +joined the --th regiment at Chatham; and subsequently he promulgated +accounts of the presentations at the Drawing-room of Colonel Sir +Michael O'Dowd, K.C.B., Lady O'Dowd (by Mrs. Malloy Malony of +Ballymalony), and Miss Glorvina O'Dowd (by Lady O'Dowd). Almost +directly after this, Dobbin's name appeared among the Lieutenant-Colonels: +for old Marshal Tiptoff had died during the passage of the +--th from Madras, and the Sovereign was pleased to advance Colonel Sir +Michael O'Dowd to the rank of Major-General on his return to England, +with an intimation that he should be Colonel of the distinguished +regiment which he had so long commanded. + +Amelia had been made aware of some of these movements. The +correspondence between George and his guardian had not ceased by any +means: William had even written once or twice to her since his +departure, but in a manner so unconstrainedly cold that the poor woman +felt now in her turn that she had lost her power over him and that, as +he had said, he was free. He had left her, and she was wretched. The +memory of his almost countless services, and lofty and affectionate +regard, now presented itself to her and rebuked her day and night. She +brooded over those recollections according to her wont, saw the purity +and beauty of the affection with which she had trifled, and reproached +herself for having flung away such a treasure. + +It was gone indeed. William had spent it all out. He loved her no +more, he thought, as he had loved her. He never could again. That sort +of regard, which he had proffered to her for so many faithful years, +can't be flung down and shattered and mended so as to show no scars. +The little heedless tyrant had so destroyed it. No, William thought +again and again, "It was myself I deluded and persisted in cajoling; +had she been worthy of the love I gave her, she would have returned it +long ago. It was a fond mistake. Isn't the whole course of life made +up of such? And suppose I had won her, should I not have been +disenchanted the day after my victory? Why pine, or be ashamed of my +defeat?" The more he thought of this long passage of his life, the more +clearly he saw his deception. "I'll go into harness again," he said, +"and do my duty in that state of life in which it has pleased Heaven to +place me. I will see that the buttons of the recruits are properly +bright and that the sergeants make no mistakes in their accounts. I +will dine at mess and listen to the Scotch surgeon telling his stories. +When I am old and broken, I will go on half-pay, and my old sisters +shall scold me. I have geliebt und gelebet, as the girl in +'Wallenstein' says. I am done. Pay the bills and get me a cigar: +find out what there is at the play to-night, Francis; to-morrow we +cross by the Batavier." He made the above speech, whereof Francis only +heard the last two lines, pacing up and down the Boompjes at Rotterdam. +The Batavier was lying in the basin. He could see the place on the +quarter-deck where he and Emmy had sat on the happy voyage out. What +had that little Mrs. Crawley to say to him? Psha; to-morrow we will put +to sea, and return to England, home, and duty! + +After June all the little Court Society of Pumpernickel used to +separate, according to the German plan, and make for a hundred +watering-places, where they drank at the wells, rode upon donkeys, +gambled at the redoutes if they had money and a mind, rushed with +hundreds of their kind to gourmandise at the tables d'hote, and idled +away the summer. The English diplomatists went off to Teoplitz and +Kissingen, their French rivals shut up their chancellerie and whisked +away to their darling Boulevard de Gand. The Transparent reigning +family took too to the waters, or retired to their hunting lodges. +Everybody went away having any pretensions to politeness, and of +course, with them, Doctor von Glauber, the Court Doctor, and his +Baroness. The seasons for the baths were the most productive periods +of the Doctor's practice--he united business with pleasure, and his +chief place of resort was Ostend, which is much frequented by Germans, +and where the Doctor treated himself and his spouse to what he called a +"dib" in the sea. + +His interesting patient, Jos, was a regular milch-cow to the Doctor, +and he easily persuaded the civilian, both for his own health's sake +and that of his charming sister, which was really very much shattered, +to pass the summer at that hideous seaport town. Emmy did not care +where she went much. Georgy jumped at the idea of a move. As for +Becky, she came as a matter of course in the fourth place inside of the +fine barouche Mr. Jos had bought, the two domestics being on the box in +front. She might have some misgivings about the friends whom she should +meet at Ostend, and who might be likely to tell ugly stories--but bah! +she was strong enough to hold her own. She had cast such an anchor in +Jos now as would require a strong storm to shake. That incident of the +picture had finished him. Becky took down her elephant and put it into +the little box which she had had from Amelia ever so many years ago. +Emmy also came off with her Lares--her two pictures--and the party, +finally, were, lodged in an exceedingly dear and uncomfortable house at +Ostend. + +There Amelia began to take baths and get what good she could from them, +and though scores of people of Becky's acquaintance passed her and cut +her, yet Mrs. Osborne, who walked about with her, and who knew nobody, +was not aware of the treatment experienced by the friend whom she had +chosen so judiciously as a companion; indeed, Becky never thought fit +to tell her what was passing under her innocent eyes. + +Some of Mrs. Rawdon Crawley's acquaintances, however, acknowledged her +readily enough,--perhaps more readily than she would have desired. +Among those were Major Loder (unattached), and Captain Rook (late of +the Rifles), who might be seen any day on the Dike, smoking and staring +at the women, and who speedily got an introduction to the hospitable +board and select circle of Mr. Joseph Sedley. In fact they would take +no denial; they burst into the house whether Becky was at home or not, +walked into Mrs. Osborne's drawing-room, which they perfumed with their +coats and mustachios, called Jos "Old buck," and invaded his +dinner-table, and laughed and drank for long hours there. + +"What can they mean?" asked Georgy, who did not like these gentlemen. +"I heard the Major say to Mrs. Crawley yesterday, 'No, no, Becky, you +shan't keep the old buck to yourself. We must have the bones in, or, +dammy, I'll split.' What could the Major mean, Mamma?" + +"Major! don't call him Major!" Emmy said. "I'm sure I can't tell what +he meant." His presence and that of his friend inspired the little lady +with intolerable terror and aversion. They paid her tipsy compliments; +they leered at her over the dinner-table. And the Captain made her +advances that filled her with sickening dismay, nor would she ever see +him unless she had George by her side. + +Rebecca, to do her justice, never would let either of these men remain +alone with Amelia; the Major was disengaged too, and swore he would be +the winner of her. A couple of ruffians were fighting for this innocent +creature, gambling for her at her own table, and though she was not +aware of the rascals' designs upon her, yet she felt a horror and +uneasiness in their presence and longed to fly. + +She besought, she entreated Jos to go. Not he. He was slow of +movement, tied to his Doctor, and perhaps to some other leading-strings. +At least Becky was not anxious to go to England. + +At last she took a great resolution--made the great plunge. She wrote +off a letter to a friend whom she had on the other side of the water, a +letter about which she did not speak a word to anybody, which she +carried herself to the post under her shawl; nor was any remark made +about it, only that she looked very much flushed and agitated when +Georgy met her, and she kissed him, and hung over him a great deal that +night. She did not come out of her room after her return from her +walk. Becky thought it was Major Loder and the Captain who frightened +her. + +"She mustn't stop here," Becky reasoned with herself. "She must go +away, the silly little fool. She is still whimpering after that gaby +of a husband--dead (and served right!) these fifteen years. She shan't +marry either of these men. It's too bad of Loder. No; she shall marry +the bamboo cane, I'll settle it this very night." + +So Becky took a cup of tea to Amelia in her private apartment and found +that lady in the company of her miniatures, and in a most melancholy +and nervous condition. She laid down the cup of tea. + +"Thank you," said Amelia. + +"Listen to me, Amelia," said Becky, marching up and down the room +before the other and surveying her with a sort of contemptuous +kindness. "I want to talk to you. You must go away from here and from +the impertinences of these men. I won't have you harassed by them: +and they will insult you if you stay. I tell you they are rascals: men +fit to send to the hulks. Never mind how I know them. I know +everybody. Jos can't protect you; he is too weak and wants a protector +himself. You are no more fit to live in the world than a baby in arms. +You must marry, or you and your precious boy will go to ruin. You must +have a husband, you fool; and one of the best gentlemen I ever saw has +offered you a hundred times, and you have rejected him, you silly, +heartless, ungrateful little creature!" + +"I tried--I tried my best, indeed I did, Rebecca," said Amelia +deprecatingly, "but I couldn't forget--"; and she finished the sentence +by looking up at the portrait. + +"Couldn't forget HIM!" cried out Becky, "that selfish humbug, that +low-bred cockney dandy, that padded booby, who had neither wit, nor +manners, nor heart, and was no more to be compared to your friend with +the bamboo cane than you are to Queen Elizabeth. Why, the man was +weary of you, and would have jilted you, but that Dobbin forced him to +keep his word. He owned it to me. He never cared for you. He used to +sneer about you to me, time after time, and made love to me the week +after he married you." + +"It's false! It's false! Rebecca," cried out Amelia, starting up. + +"Look there, you fool," Becky said, still with provoking good humour, +and taking a little paper out of her belt, she opened it and flung it +into Emmy's lap. "You know his handwriting. He wrote that to +me--wanted me to run away with him--gave it me under your nose, the day +before he was shot--and served him right!" Becky repeated. + +Emmy did not hear her; she was looking at the letter. It was that which +George had put into the bouquet and given to Becky on the night of the +Duchess of Richmond's ball. It was as she said: the foolish young man +had asked her to fly. + +Emmy's head sank down, and for almost the last time in which she shall +be called upon to weep in this history, she commenced that work. Her +head fell to her bosom, and her hands went up to her eyes; and there +for a while, she gave way to her emotions, as Becky stood on and +regarded her. Who shall analyse those tears and say whether they were +sweet or bitter? Was she most grieved because the idol of her life was +tumbled down and shivered at her feet, or indignant that her love had +been so despised, or glad because the barrier was removed which modesty +had placed between her and a new, a real affection? "There is nothing +to forbid me now," she thought. "I may love him with all my heart now. +Oh, I will, I will, if he will but let me and forgive me." I believe it +was this feeling rushed over all the others which agitated that gentle +little bosom. + +Indeed, she did not cry so much as Becky expected--the other soothed +and kissed her--a rare mark of sympathy with Mrs. Becky. She treated +Emmy like a child and patted her head. "And now let us get pen and ink +and write to him to come this minute," she said. + +"I--I wrote to him this morning," Emmy said, blushing exceedingly. +Becky screamed with laughter--"Un biglietto," she sang out with Rosina, +"eccolo qua!"--the whole house echoed with her shrill singing. + +Two mornings after this little scene, although the day was rainy and +gusty, and Amelia had had an exceedingly wakeful night, listening to +the wind roaring, and pitying all travellers by land and by water, yet +she got up early and insisted upon taking a walk on the Dike with +Georgy; and there she paced as the rain beat into her face, and she +looked out westward across the dark sea line and over the swollen +billows which came tumbling and frothing to the shore. Neither spoke +much, except now and then, when the boy said a few words to his timid +companion, indicative of sympathy and protection. + +"I hope he won't cross in such weather," Emmy said. + +"I bet ten to one he does," the boy answered. "Look, Mother, there's +the smoke of the steamer." It was that signal, sure enough. + +But though the steamer was under way, he might not be on board; he +might not have got the letter; he might not choose to come. A hundred +fears poured one over the other into the little heart, as fast as the +waves on to the Dike. + +The boat followed the smoke into sight. Georgy had a dandy telescope +and got the vessel under view in the most skilful manner. And he made +appropriate nautical comments upon the manner of the approach of the +steamer as she came nearer and nearer, dipping and rising in the water. +The signal of an English steamer in sight went fluttering up to the +mast on the pier. I daresay Mrs. Amelia's heart was in a similar +flutter. + +Emmy tried to look through the telescope over George's shoulder, but +she could make nothing of it. She only saw a black eclipse bobbing up +and down before her eyes. + +George took the glass again and raked the vessel. "How she does pitch!" +he said. "There goes a wave slap over her bows. There's only two +people on deck besides the steersman. There's a man lying down, and +a--chap in a--cloak with a--Hooray!--it's Dob, by Jingo!" He clapped to +the telescope and flung his arms round his mother. As for that lady, +let us say what she did in the words of a favourite poet--"Dakruoen +gelasasa." She was sure it was William. It could be no other. What +she had said about hoping that he would not come was all hypocrisy. Of +course he would come; what could he do else but come? She knew he would +come. + +The ship came swiftly nearer and nearer. As they went in to meet her +at the landing-place at the quay, Emmy's knees trembled so that she +scarcely could run. She would have liked to kneel down and say her +prayers of thanks there. Oh, she thought, she would be all her life +saying them! + +It was such a bad day that as the vessel came alongside of the quay +there were no idlers abroad, scarcely even a commissioner on the look +out for the few passengers in the steamer. That young scapegrace +George had fled too, and as the gentleman in the old cloak lined with +red stuff stepped on to the shore, there was scarcely any one present +to see what took place, which was briefly this: + +A lady in a dripping white bonnet and shawl, with her two little hands +out before her, went up to him, and in the next minute she had +altogether disappeared under the folds of the old cloak, and was +kissing one of his hands with all her might; whilst the other, I +suppose, was engaged in holding her to his heart (which her head just +about reached) and in preventing her from tumbling down. She was +murmuring something about--forgive--dear William--dear, dear, dearest +friend--kiss, kiss, kiss, and so forth--and in fact went on under the +cloak in an absurd manner. + +When Emmy emerged from it, she still kept tight hold of one of +William's hands, and looked up in his face. It was full of sadness and +tender love and pity. She understood its reproach and hung down her +head. + +"It was time you sent for me, dear Amelia," he said. + +"You will never go again, William?" + +"No, never," he answered, and pressed the dear little soul once more to +his heart. + +As they issued out of the custom-house precincts, Georgy broke out on +them, with his telescope up to his eye, and a loud laugh of welcome; he +danced round the couple and performed many facetious antics as he led +them up to the house. Jos wasn't up yet; Becky not visible (though she +looked at them through the blinds). Georgy ran off to see about +breakfast. Emmy, whose shawl and bonnet were off in the passage in the +hands of Mrs. Payne, now went to undo the clasp of William's cloak, +and--we will, if you please, go with George, and look after breakfast +for the Colonel. The vessel is in port. He has got the prize he has +been trying for all his life. The bird has come in at last. There it +is with its head on his shoulder, billing and cooing close up to his +heart, with soft outstretched fluttering wings. This is what he has +asked for every day and hour for eighteen years. This is what he pined +after. Here it is--the summit, the end--the last page of the third +volume. Good-bye, Colonel--God bless you, honest William!--Farewell, +dear Amelia--Grow green again, tender little parasite, round the rugged +old oak to which you cling! + +Perhaps it was compunction towards the kind and simple creature, who +had been the first in life to defend her, perhaps it was a dislike to +all such sentimental scenes--but Rebecca, satisfied with her part in +the transaction, never presented herself before Colonel Dobbin and the +lady whom he married. "Particular business," she said, took her to +Bruges, whither she went, and only Georgy and his uncle were present at +the marriage ceremony. When it was over, and Georgy had rejoined his +parents, Mrs. Becky returned (just for a few days) to comfort the +solitary bachelor, Joseph Sedley. He preferred a continental life, he +said, and declined to join in housekeeping with his sister and her +husband. + +Emmy was very glad in her heart to think that she had written to her +husband before she read or knew of that letter of George's. "I knew it +all along," William said; "but could I use that weapon against the poor +fellow's memory? It was that which made me suffer so when you--" + +"Never speak of that day again," Emmy cried out, so contrite and humble +that William turned off the conversation by his account of Glorvina and +dear old Peggy O'Dowd, with whom he was sitting when the letter of +recall reached him. "If you hadn't sent for me," he added with a +laugh, "who knows what Glorvina's name might be now?" + +At present it is Glorvina Posky (now Mrs. Major Posky); she took him on +the death of his first wife, having resolved never to marry out of the +regiment. Lady O'Dowd is also so attached to it that, she says, if +anything were to happen to Mick, bedad she'd come back and marry some +of 'em. But the Major-General is quite well and lives in great +splendour at O'Dowdstown, with a pack of beagles, and (with the +exception of perhaps their neighbour, Hoggarty of Castle Hoggarty) he +is the first man of his county. Her Ladyship still dances jigs, and +insisted on standing up with the Master of the Horse at the Lord +Lieutenant's last ball. Both she and Glorvina declared that Dobbin had +used the latter SHEAMFULLY, but Posky falling in, Glorvina was +consoled, and a beautiful turban from Paris appeased the wrath of Lady +O'Dowd. + +When Colonel Dobbin quitted the service, which he did immediately after +his marriage, he rented a pretty little country place in Hampshire, not +far from Queen's Crawley, where, after the passing of the Reform Bill, +Sir Pitt and his family constantly resided now. All idea of a Peerage +was out of the question, the Baronet's two seats in Parliament being +lost. He was both out of pocket and out of spirits by that +catastrophe, failed in his health, and prophesied the speedy ruin of +the Empire. + +Lady Jane and Mrs. Dobbin became great friends--there was a perpetual +crossing of pony-chaises between the Hall and the Evergreens, the +Colonel's place (rented of his friend Major Ponto, who was abroad with +his family). Her Ladyship was godmother to Mrs. Dobbin's child, which +bore her name, and was christened by the Rev. James Crawley, who +succeeded his father in the living: and a pretty close friendship +subsisted between the two lads, George and Rawdon, who hunted and shot +together in the vacations, were both entered of the same college at +Cambridge, and quarrelled with each other about Lady Jane's daughter, +with whom they were both, of course, in love. A match between George +and that young lady was long a favourite scheme of both the matrons, +though I have heard that Miss Crawley herself inclined towards her +cousin. + +Mrs. Rawdon Crawley's name was never mentioned by either family. There +were reasons why all should be silent regarding her. For wherever Mr. +Joseph Sedley went, she travelled likewise, and that infatuated man +seemed to be entirely her slave. The Colonel's lawyers informed him +that his brother-in-law had effected a heavy insurance upon his life, +whence it was probable that he had been raising money to discharge +debts. He procured prolonged leave of absence from the East India +House, and indeed, his infirmities were daily increasing. + +On hearing the news about the insurance, Amelia, in a good deal of +alarm, entreated her husband to go to Brussels, where Jos then was, and +inquire into the state of his affairs. The Colonel quitted home with +reluctance (for he was deeply immersed in his History of the Punjaub +which still occupies him, and much alarmed about his little daughter, +whom he idolizes, and who was just recovering from the chicken-pox) and +went to Brussels and found Jos living at one of the enormous hotels in +that city. Mrs. Crawley, who had her carriage, gave entertainments, +and lived in a very genteel manner, occupied another suite of +apartments in the same hotel. + +The Colonel, of course, did not desire to see that lady, or even think +proper to notify his arrival at Brussels, except privately to Jos by a +message through his valet. Jos begged the Colonel to come and see him +that night, when Mrs. Crawley would be at a soiree, and when they could +meet alone. He found his brother-in-law in a condition of pitiable +infirmity--and dreadfully afraid of Rebecca, though eager in his +praises of her. She tended him through a series of unheard-of +illnesses with a fidelity most admirable. She had been a daughter to +him. "But--but--oh, for God's sake, do come and live near me, +and--and--see me sometimes," whimpered out the unfortunate man. + +The Colonel's brow darkened at this. "We can't, Jos," he said. +"Considering the circumstances, Amelia can't visit you." + +"I swear to you--I swear to you on the Bible," gasped out Joseph, +wanting to kiss the book, "that she is as innocent as a child, as +spotless as your own wife." + +"It may be so," said the Colonel gloomily, "but Emmy can't come to you. +Be a man, Jos: break off this disreputable connection. Come home to +your family. We hear your affairs are involved." + +"Involved!" cried Jos. "Who has told such calumnies? All my money is +placed out most advantageously. Mrs. Crawley--that is--I mean--it is +laid out to the best interest." + +"You are not in debt, then? Why did you insure your life?" + +"I thought--a little present to her--in case anything happened; and you +know my health is so delicate--common gratitude you know--and I intend +to leave all my money to you--and I can spare it out of my income, +indeed I can," cried out William's weak brother-in-law. + +The Colonel besought Jos to fly at once--to go back to India, whither +Mrs. Crawley could not follow him; to do anything to break off a +connection which might have the most fatal consequences to him. + +Jos clasped his hands and cried, "He would go back to India. He would +do anything, only he must have time: they mustn't say anything to Mrs. +Crawley--she'd--she'd kill me if she knew it. You don't know what a +terrible woman she is," the poor wretch said. + +"Then, why not come away with me?" said Dobbin in reply; but Jos had +not the courage. "He would see Dobbin again in the morning; he must on +no account say that he had been there. He must go now. Becky might +come in." And Dobbin quitted him, full of forebodings. + +He never saw Jos more. Three months afterwards Joseph Sedley died at +Aix-la-Chapelle. It was found that all his property had been muddled +away in speculations, and was represented by valueless shares in +different bubble companies. All his available assets were the two +thousand pounds for which his life was insured, and which were left +equally between his beloved "sister Amelia, wife of, &c., and his +friend and invaluable attendant during sickness, Rebecca, wife of +Lieutenant-Colonel Rawdon Crawley, C.B.," who was appointed +administratrix. + +The solicitor of the insurance company swore it was the blackest case +that ever had come before him, talked of sending a commission to Aix to +examine into the death, and the Company refused payment of the policy. +But Mrs., or Lady Crawley, as she styled herself, came to town at once +(attended with her solicitors, Messrs. Burke, Thurtell, and Hayes, of +Thavies Inn) and dared the Company to refuse the payment. They invited +examination, they declared that she was the object of an infamous +conspiracy, which had been pursuing her all through life, and triumphed +finally. The money was paid, and her character established, but +Colonel Dobbin sent back his share of the legacy to the insurance +office and rigidly declined to hold any communication with Rebecca. + +She never was Lady Crawley, though she continued so to call herself. +His Excellency Colonel Rawdon Crawley died of yellow fever at Coventry +Island, most deeply beloved and deplored, and six weeks before the +demise of his brother, Sir Pitt. The estate consequently devolved upon +the present Sir Rawdon Crawley, Bart. + +He, too, has declined to see his mother, to whom he makes a liberal +allowance, and who, besides, appears to be very wealthy. The Baronet +lives entirely at Queen's Crawley, with Lady Jane and her daughter, +whilst Rebecca, Lady Crawley, chiefly hangs about Bath and Cheltenham, +where a very strong party of excellent people consider her to be a most +injured woman. She has her enemies. Who has not? Her life is her +answer to them. She busies herself in works of piety. She goes to +church, and never without a footman. Her name is in all the Charity +Lists. The destitute orange-girl, the neglected washerwoman, the +distressed muffin-man find in her a fast and generous friend. She is +always having stalls at Fancy Fairs for the benefit of these hapless +beings. Emmy, her children, and the Colonel, coming to London some +time back, found themselves suddenly before her at one of these fairs. +She cast down her eyes demurely and smiled as they started away from +her; Emmy scurrying off on the arm of George (now grown a dashing young +gentleman) and the Colonel seizing up his little Janey, of whom he is +fonder than of anything in the world--fonder even than of his History +of the Punjaub. + +"Fonder than he is of me," Emmy thinks with a sigh. But he never said a +word to Amelia that was not kind and gentle, or thought of a want of +hers that he did not try to gratify. + +Ah! Vanitas Vanitatum! which of us is happy in this world? Which of +us has his desire? or, having it, is satisfied?--come, children, let us +shut up the box and the puppets, for our play is played out. + +*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 599 ***
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