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+*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 58660 ***
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+[Transcriber's Note: Obvious printer errors in the original have been
+corrected without note. References to "Hospice du Chats" have been
+retained as they appear in the original, despite the grammatical
+error.]
+
+
+
+
+PUSSY
+
+AND
+
+Her Language
+
+
+BY
+
+MARVIN R. CLARK.
+
+
+Including a Paper on the Wonderful Discovery of the Cat Language.
+
+BY
+
+ALPHONSE LEON GRIMALDI, F.R.S., etc.
+
+
+  COPYRIGHT 1895
+  BY MARVIN R. CLARK
+
+
+
+
+CHAPTERS.
+
+
+I.--"IT WAS THE CAT."
+
+II.--A LITTLE INNOCENT WHO KNOWS THE FAMILY SECRETS.
+
+III.--LIKE UNTO OURSELVES.
+
+IV.--NELLY AND TOM.
+
+V.--MEMORY AND INTELLIGENCE.
+
+VI.--FRIENDS OF THE CAT.
+
+VII.--SOME REMARKABLE TRUE STORIES.
+
+VIII.--HOSPICE DU CHATS.
+
+IX.--ASTOUNDING REVELATIONS BY THE CAT.
+
+X.--PROFESSOR GRIMALDI'S WONDERFUL DISCOVERY.
+
+XI.--SIGNS AND SOUNDS.
+
+XII.--DESCRIPTIVE LANGUAGES.
+
+XIII.--LANGUAGE OF DIVINE ORIGIN.
+
+XIV.--POWER OF SPEECH IN THE FELINE.
+
+XV.--ILLUSTRATIVE STORIES.
+
+XVI.--SUPERIORITY OF THE CAT OVER OTHER QUADRUMINA.
+
+XVII.--INTELLECTUAL POWER OF THE CAT.
+
+XVIII.--SOME CHARACTERISTICS OF THE CAT.
+
+XIX.--GENEROSITY, CUNNING AND CAMARADERIE.
+
+XX.--VOWELS AND LIQUIDS PREDOMINATING.
+
+XXI.--CAT WORDS IN COMMON USE.
+
+XXII.--A COMPREHENSIVE LIST OF WORDS.
+
+XXIII.--A MUSICAL LANGUAGE.
+
+XXIV.--THE IMPORTANCE OF SIGNS.
+
+
+
+
+PUSSY AND HER LANGUAGE.
+
+
+
+
+I.
+
+"IT WAS THE CAT."
+
+
+When, in the fable, that humorous progenitor of the human species,
+according to that slicker, slyer and still more humorous, practical
+joker, Darwin, the monkey, cast about him in a sudden emergency for
+some useful utensil adequate to the purpose of pulling his chestnuts
+out of the fire, his selfish ambition was rewarded by the sight of no
+less distinguished a person than the Cat. Notwithstanding the piteous
+protests and flowing tears of Pussy, she was forced into the service
+of the monkey, and ever after there lived in the memory of man that
+wonderful story, from which we get the expressive saying of "making a
+cat's paw" of anything or anybody.
+
+The cruelty of the act and the subsequent greed of the simian who,
+despite the appeals of the feline for a share in the delicious roast,
+gave her nothing but the smell, of which he could not have deprived
+her, appeals to the indignation of a just public. But the suffering
+and the tears and the cries of the Cat command the sympathy of all
+right-minded people who rest in peace under the "Banner of Freedom,"
+and fight against oppression. The moral is demonstrative, as you will
+see.
+
+The presiding genius who carries the portfolio and administers
+the affairs of the most important of all the divisions of the
+household--the culinary department--the cook, wisely appreciates the
+inestimable value of the Cat, and never fails to make convenient
+use of the animal, even employing her upon occasions when Pussy
+becomes nothing short of a miracle-worker. Of course, the reader
+may differentiate the story with common sense, but rarely, for the
+word of the queen of the realm of the culinary department is as the
+verity of the Law and the Gospel. The mistress may wonder, and a
+smile of incredulity may pass over the countenance of the master of
+the house, but the breakage of crockery and the lavish disappearance
+of spirits, wine and ale, the wonderful growth of the butcher's bill,
+the prodigal wanderings of butter not strong enough to sustain its
+own weight, the overdone appearance of the breakfast steak, and the
+underdone appearance of the dinner joint are attributable only to the
+household pet, for the cook hath said "It was the Cat!" Even when the
+mistress sadly discovers the queen of the sacred domain, who has the
+power to poison the food she dispenses, lying prone upon the kitchen
+floor at the dinner hour, the fumes of the best brandy escaping from
+her stentorian lungs and her limbs limp as fresh putty, the bouquet
+of the spirits of 1840 comes to the sensitive nostrils of the lady
+laden with the murmurings of the cook, "It was the Cat!" and the
+faithful mistress intuitively realizes that there has been a battle
+royal between the queen regent and the agent of the king of that
+realm where ice appeareth not, and all skating is done upon rollers.
+
+When the extensive disappearance of the family preserves causes
+inquiry, and the heir of the house is questioned concerning his
+knowledge of the loss, he unhesitatingly and solemnly declares that
+"It was the Cat!" which is in the usual course of events, and always
+to be believed, even when it is noted by the nurse that the nose of
+the urchin resembles, in color, that of a man whose ways are not
+those of the temperate, and smelleth of strawberry jelly, and his
+chin resembleth that of one who has but recently been thickly coated
+with raspberry jam.
+
+Now, mark the moral. We loudly censure the monkey in the fable, and
+smile at the charges of the others, not pausing to consider that the
+sufferings of the flesh are endurable, but the tortures of the mind
+from undeserved censure are frequently beyond endurance. The great
+lover of the Cat, Shakespeare, as if the wrongs of the calumniated
+feline in his mind aptly expresses the feelings of the Cat, when he
+says, through the medium of Othello:
+
+     "Who steals my purse, steals trash; 'tis something, nothing;
+     'Twas mine, 'tis his, and has been slave to thousands;
+     But he that filches from me my good name,
+     Robs me of that which not enriches him,
+     And makes me poor indeed."
+
+"Give a dog a bad name, and you send him to"--the place not hung
+with icy stalactites. It is a solemn and well-known fact that one of
+a million dogs gets a bad name, while not one out of a million Cats
+gets a good one. It is out of the shadow of this cruel prejudice that
+I would lead the Cat, and place her upon the pedestal to which she
+should have been raised for the admiration of the world, long, long
+ago.
+
+
+
+
+II.
+
+A LITTLE INNOCENT WHO KNOWS THE FAMILY SECRETS.
+
+
+When a startling discovery which virtually concerns every atom of
+humanity has been rounded into a fact, so that the average human
+intellect may grasp and, after thoroughly comprehending its value,
+make the proper application of it, the sooner it is given to the
+world for the benefit of the human race, if benefit there be in the
+discovery, the better for the world and all that are upon it.
+
+Such a fact, and one which will go far to revolutionize society, has
+certainly been discovered, and, I hope, may be presented in so clear
+and comprehensive a manner that "he who runs may read," and readily
+realize its vast importance to the world, although its development
+will, undoubtedly, spread the greatest alarm wherever it is made
+known.
+
+It will not be denied, when I make the assertion, that in every
+household, in the hovel of the poorest as well as in the mansion of
+the richest, in the storehouse, the factory, the workshop, the mill,
+the foundry, the newspaper office, the schoolhouse, the hospital,
+the theatre, the counting-room, the great libraries, the ships and
+the political headquarters, even in the grand capitol buildings at
+Washington, and penetrating, without hindrance, into the very secret
+Cabinet meetings at the White House, and almost everywhere throughout
+the whole inhabitable globe, there exists a spy upon whose ears fall
+the secrets of a nation, which, if breathed at some inopportune
+moment, might be its ruin. With an air of insouciant nonchalance,
+this ever-present spy meanders everywhere and, with ears alert to
+catch the softest whisper, gives token only of a feeling of innocuous
+desuetude when scenes and secrets of the most astounding character
+are being developed to the understanding.
+
+From time immemorial these facts have existed with the knowledge and
+consent of everybody, but, strangely enough, without a thought that
+it might be possible for the Cat to communicate the secrets thus
+surreptitiously obtained through the careless confidence of humanity.
+
+The safety of such confidences lies entirely in the assumption
+of what has hitherto been regarded as a fact, and, although such
+utterances have been made in the presence of this universal spy,
+there was no possibility of their communication to the outer world
+because of its lack of power to do so. The astonishment following the
+recent discovery lies in the fact that this overweening confidence of
+man has been sadly misplaced, for I may state with the firmest faith
+in the proofs which have been presented to me, that, notwithstanding
+the belief to the contrary, the whole world has been misguided and
+the ever-present feline community has a language of its own, and,
+further, that it has become intelligible to more than one individual,
+myself among the number.
+
+The importance of this startling discovery cannot be overestimated.
+It vitally concerns every human being in the known world, as may
+readily be perceived after a moment's thought. The possibility of
+the existence of a language as a means of communication of thoughts
+and ideas between animals has, for ages, been a subject of comment
+with many, while to those whose association with and fondness
+for the animal kingdom cannot but admit that there is no doubt
+concerning the truth. In fact, innumerable evidences of signs and
+verbal communications between what are incorrectly stigmatized as
+dumb beasts are constantly being demonstrated to the world but,
+unfortunately, described as evidences of instinct, although bearing
+every proof of thought emanating from the soul as uttered by the
+human being.
+
+I may be considered as aiming too high in my declaration of what I
+shall proceed to prove, but it is with a firm belief that I shall
+be fully able to substantiate my assertion and convince the reader.
+Such wonderful evidences of the astonishing sagacity of animals
+have come to the knowledge of every man and woman that, when these
+instances are remembered, I consider myself well on the road toward
+demonstrating the assertion that there is a language of communication
+between animals.
+
+Explain to me, if you can, why, if they do not possess souls, when
+shrouded in slumber, the horse will neigh and prance, the Cat will
+cry, the lion will roar, the monkey will chatter and the dog will
+bark and whine while dreaming, even as a human being will give
+evidence of a restless mind when the animal senses are dormant.
+
+Some years ago I possessed a dog who learned, without instruction
+and with little difficulty, to turn the knob and thus gain admission
+through the outer door of my house to the interior. Last Winter I was
+in possession of two Skye terriers, to whom I frequently remarked in
+a quiet tone of voice, in the morning, that I would take them out
+for a walk in the afternoon, and, at the hour when they had been
+taken out by me upon previous occasions, they invariably put their
+noses together and communicated their ideas. As a result of such
+communication first one and then the other, then both worried me
+with their paws and called to me unceasingly, until I kept my word
+with them. These are but two of the countless instances which have
+come under my observation, as numberless cases have been met with by
+others, proving, beyond denial, that these and other animals are as
+fully possessed of memory as is that nobler animal, man.
+
+Call it instinct, if you will, but is that not to be considered as
+more than instinct which prompts the Cat to distinguish between
+the friend and the enemy of its master and mistress, and even to
+protect them from the attacks of an enemy at the risk of the life
+of the animal? The number of such instances is legion. Surely the
+faithfulness of our domestic animals cannot be doubted, but we may
+doubt the humanity of man to the animal kingdom when the evidence of
+the same senses in what are termed the lower animals is said to be
+instinct, while in the human it is called soul and mind.
+
+It has frequently been remarked by those who have made a study of
+the animal kingdom that the intelligence of the lower animals, in
+many matters, is far superior to that possessed by human beings. For
+instance, the natural, living, breathing barometer is a Cat, and
+there are none better. When a Cat washes herself in the ordinary
+manner, we may be sure of bright, sunshiny weather, but when she
+licks herself against the grain of her fur or washes herself with her
+paw over the ear, or sits with her tail to the fire, there will be a
+storm.
+
+
+
+
+III.
+
+LIKE UNTO OURSELVES.
+
+
+At certain stages in our great journey we sit down and take a
+retrospect, going over, hand in hand with memory, the old road
+and carefully treading in the same footsteps, looking upon the
+same scenes, suffering the old pains and rejoicing in the same
+joys. At such times we wonder at the misplaced confidences and
+our unexplainable, as well as our unjust prejudices. We admit our
+proneness to go with the current when in the swim, and the natural
+lassitude which prompts us, rather than argue a point or spur
+ourselves to the task of disproving what may be false, which means
+work, to take for granted the theory of another. We often excuse
+ourselves upon the plea that one cannot find time, in this short
+life, to prove everything, and we must necessarily take for granted
+many things, perhaps upon the guarantee of those in whom we have
+confidence, sometimes because it has passed into a proverb and at
+other times for the reason that we are too tired to go against the
+current and set ourselves up for oddities or cranks. But we do stop
+and wonder at our prejudices, more particularly because we have had
+occasion so many times to completely reverse our opinions, wondering,
+at the same time, how we ever could have jumped at the conclusion
+that because a nut has a sour rind it must necessarily have a sour
+kernel, or that the bristling appearance of the prickly outside
+denoted that it was prickly all through, and for this reason to be
+avoided. We hear a man derided by the mob and follow the crowd--we
+discriminate when a woman is talked about derogatively and avoid her
+because it is the rule--then, perhaps, it is in after years, when the
+object has lived down the false assertions, at some certain stage in
+our journey, we look back, wonderingly, commiserate the sufferings of
+one and another and say that it was nothing but prejudice, and then
+what? Then we go on our way and do the selfsame thing over and over
+again.
+
+How easy it is to do all these things we people of experience can
+testify. We say, "Give a dog a bad name," and so on, but how singular
+it would sound if one should say, "Give a Cat a bad name!" Why,
+the Cat has it, already! Are you sure that the almost universally
+bad name of the Cat is not pure and unadulterated prejudice, and,
+considered as a generality, with the least foundation in fact?
+
+You say that the Cat is treacherous, a thief and a lover of places,
+not persons. This is the sum and substance of humanity's grievances
+against the feline. I know of no other despicable attributes ascribed
+to the Cat, and admit that these would be enough to condemn her, were
+they true. But they are not true, saving only in exceptional cases.
+Providentially for the Cat, she is provided with natural means of
+defence and uses her claws at times and very justly when imposed
+upon. I never knew, or heard of, a Cat who deliberately and out of
+pure viciousness, scratched or fought a person whom she might have
+reasonably supposed to be her friend. Be just and admit this fact.
+
+Concerning the charge of thievery, I admit that Pussy's derelictions
+have been proven in exceptional cases, but plead, in partial
+justification, the neglect of master or mistress to properly provide
+for her, and that her food was due to her for labor performed, upon
+the principle that "the workman is worthy of his hire." Consider
+that Pussy has ridden your house of mice and rats, and continues,
+day by day, to perform her duty of keeping the thieves from your
+dwelling--that if you profit by her prognostications, she tells
+you, far better than a barometer, the truth about the weather, long
+before there comes a change--that she even guards your home from
+intruders--that she is the first, if permitted to do so, to welcome
+your home-coming--that she is ever ready, with her gentle purr, to
+express her love for you and with her soothing song--the gentlest
+ever heard--to calm your troubled mind. Think for a moment how her
+winning ways and pretty playfulness have amused you for many an hour
+and won a warm place in your heart for the little household pet, then
+justify her for helping herself when you either forgot or refused to
+give her the nourishment she had so richly earned. This is by way
+of justification of the feline, in the exceptional case, when she
+takes what may not be regarded as technically her own, although the
+equivalent of the same is rightfully her due. Ask yourself if, when
+you walk into your landlady's larder and help yourself to the viands
+there because your luncheon is not ready on time, you are not as
+great a criminal as Pussy, who has been equally neglected. Concerning
+the accusation that she is fond of places and not of persons, I will
+have something definite to say further on.
+
+There is one undeniable fact concerning animals, which is that when
+associated with man they acquire his ways and imitate his habits.
+Thus the Cat, but, in a more delicate manner, soon takes upon herself
+the temper, mannerisms, actions and ways of her mistress, and in
+her life imitates the actions of the one who is her admiration and
+involuntary teacher. Cats, in short, are like ourselves, and are
+subject to the same rules that govern all humanity throughout the
+habitable globe. I cannot better illustrate and prove this fact than
+by relating a story that came under my observation, and from which,
+while I vouch for the truth of it, you may draw your own conclusions.
+
+
+
+
+IV.
+
+NELLIE AND TOM.
+
+
+I was a boy of eighteen years of age when my mother brought home with
+her, all the way from the State of Maine, a Maltese Pussy, of full
+breed. We called her "Nellie." After mother had buttered Nellie's
+feet, a process which she said would always keep a cat from running
+away from home, the aristocratic Nellie became an important member of
+our household, and never deserted us.
+
+One day I brought home to Nellie a companion who had been presented
+to me by a friend. "Tom," as we called the boy, was a pure Maltese,
+and a giant of his kind, a cheerful, clever and peaceable fellow and
+an ornament and pet, for he was admired by everybody who saw him. His
+feet were also buttered, and after a little spat with Nellie, who,
+at first, could see no just reason why Tom should encroach upon her
+domain, the two became fast friends, and finally married and raised
+several litters of pure Maltese kittens, all of whom we gave to
+longing friends save one, which we kept for Nellie's sake.
+
+Tom remained true to his marriage vows for a long time, but one day,
+about six months after his advent in the household, he was missing,
+and the neighborhood was searched for Tom. He remained away until the
+following afternoon, when he returned, looking sheepish, while his
+appearance bore unmistakable evidence of his having been indulging
+in a debauch. Tom was very crestfallen and expressed his sorrow to
+his spouse Nellie, who would have nothing to do with him for several
+days. Poor Tom was disconsolate, and applied to me for sympathy. Of
+course every member of the family reproved Tom for his waywardness,
+but the story of the "Prodigal Son" and his return, in tatters, was
+not forgotten, although the fatted calf was omitted, and I was the
+first to forgive and console Tom. I used my influence so successfully
+with Nellie, who was very fond of me, that once more Tom was taken
+into Nellie's favor and everything went on as usual, excepting that
+Nellie gave every evidence of keeping a close eye upon her erring
+liege-lord, who was not fully restored to her confidence.
+
+Some five weeks after, while Nellie was nursing a new brood of
+kittens, Tom turned up missing again. We did not go to any trouble
+that time to search for him, nor did we feel any anxiety concerning
+the wandering minstrel, knowing from our former experience that he
+was big enough and old enough to take care of himself. Three weary
+weeks for Nellie went by while she was worrying for her Romeo,
+although she tried to conceal her anxiety behind an appearance of
+unconcern, while lavishing her affections upon her infants. At the
+end of the third week Tom leisurely strolled into the house and
+sought Nellie's presence. He bore an air of bravado which seemed to
+say that he was lord and master of his own family, that he had a
+right to go whither, and stay there as long as he pleased. But he was
+battered and torn, almost beyond recognition. One eye was completely
+closed, much of his fur was gone, he limped when he walked, one ear
+was entirely bitten through and a portion of it missing, and his head
+was covered with bloody wounds, while his general appearance was
+emaciated, tattered and forlorn. Nellie's tail was a sight to behold
+when she spied Tom, and she raised herself to a sitting posture and
+threw upon the debauchee a withering look of contempt which sent his
+tail between his legs in less time than it takes to tell it, while he
+completely lost his braggadocio air and slunk off to a corner of the
+room and Nellie returned to her babies.
+
+After the tramp had received a scolding from each one of the family,
+and been thoroughly cleansed and his wounds dressed, he sat down a
+few feet from his lawful wife and moaned and cried for an hour or
+more, without once attracting a look of pity from her. After that
+he approached Nellie and attempted to ask her forgiveness for his
+absence upon some fictitious ground, but that faithful one raised
+herself upon her hind legs, spat upon the battered tramp and then
+deliberately beat him with her paws and scratched him with her claws
+until he slunk out of the room, a well reproved if not a better Cat.
+For more than a week, every time Tom made overtures looking toward a
+reconciliation, Nellie repeated her chastisement, and I fully believe
+if any other Maltese Tom had presented himself during that time, she
+would have taught Tom a lesson which he would have remembered to
+the end of his life, by adopting him in Tom's place, and, with his
+assistance, driven out upon the charity of a cold world, her wayward
+and presumably unfaithful consort. But, although we refused to
+intercede for him with Nellie, in the course of time Tom was partly
+forgiven and was again kept under the watchful eye of Nellie.
+
+Three months later the vagabond again forgot his marriage vows and
+disappeared. This time we gave him up for lost, as he did not return
+for a month. Considering him a thing of the beautiful past, I bought
+another Tom and brought him home to Nellie. Singularly enough, the
+two did not fraternize, although it was not the fault of the new
+Tom, and Nellie remained, as she supposed, a widow, with her kittens
+as her constant care. Upon them she lavished all of her affections,
+spitting at and boxing the new Tom whenever he approached them.
+
+One fine day, to our utter astonishment, the scoundrel, Tom, strolled
+in upon the scene as nonchalantly as if he had not been off on a long
+protracted cruise. But this time he was covered with sores, and had,
+in addition, the mange. He was a sorry-looking Tom, and an animal to
+avoid. Even in that condition, I am sure, Nellie would have nursed
+him and doctored him until he recovered, had he been faithful to her.
+But there was no hope of it now. She had evidently been thinking
+deeply about the newcomer, and was making comparisons.
+
+At first he showed contrition, but when he discovered the new Tom,
+who he supposed had assumed his duties in the household, he did not
+become an Enoch Arden, but, with fire in his evil eye and without
+making proper inquiries concerning Nellie's unexceptionable conduct,
+with a great bologna sausage of a fuzzy tail and a fearful shriek for
+vengeance, he made for Tom Number Two with the speed of lightning, in
+the stereotyped manner of an outraged husband whose lapses of fealty
+and so on are forgotten in the greater sin of an interloper.
+
+What might have become of the innocent new fellow was illustrated in
+the story of the Kilkenny cats, with this difference, that one of
+the two would have been left on the earth, and it wouldn't have been
+the new fellow, for Tom was the maddest Cat you ever saw. When the
+tocsin of war was sounded by the mangy deserter, Nellie sprang for
+him and there ensued a battle royal. There was war to the knife, from
+the point to the hilt. The screams of the combatants were terrific,
+and the dining-room floor was covered with a constantly accumulating
+mass of Maltese fur. In both the new Tom and Nellie, who, alone, was
+a host in herself, the mangy Tom found more than his match, and he
+was beaten, torn, wounded at every point, and a total wreck when he
+scurried out of the house and took his sorrowful way down the street,
+toward the dock at the foot of Hubert street. Whether or not he did
+the best thing he could have done under the circumstances, and went
+and drowned himself, is more [Transcriber's Note: The remainder of
+this sentence appears to be missing.] original Tom, by the side of
+Nellie, never knew him more, for the new fellow thereafter succeeded
+to his lares and penates and Nellie and he lived happily together
+until Tom number two was shot by some cruel person. After that Nellie
+mourned his loss and refused to be comforted with another, although,
+of course, there were many Toms who would have lain down and died
+for her. She lived but a short time after the death of her second
+husband, and died regretted by all of us.
+
+
+
+
+V.
+
+MEMORY AND INTELLIGENCE.
+
+
+We find, upon looking closely and impartially into our natural gifts,
+that it is memory that fails and proves treacherous to us more
+frequently than any other faculty, and as we go on with life, the
+fact becomes more and more apparent. With the Cat, memory never fails
+her. The dog may fail to find his way home, particularly the little
+dog, but the Cat, never.
+
+No more conclusive testimony concerning the memory and intelligence
+of the Cat can be given to a doubting world than that contained in
+the following story from the columns of the New York Press. It is
+also illustrative of the love of persons as well as places, by the
+feline. It is recited in a straightforward manner, and I have no
+doubt of its truthfulness. At any rate, if the reader has his doubts,
+he can readily, at the cost of a few cents, paid to Uncle Sam in
+postage stamps, satisfy himself concerning the story, for names are
+given and the address is plain. "Fritz Heath," says the narrator,
+"is the noble son of a worthy mother, and lives in Syracuse, N.Y.
+Fritz is a large gray and white tomcat. Fritz and his mother are
+the proteges of Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Heath. Mr. Heath is a telegraph
+operator in the employ of the New York Central Railroad. Both Fritz
+and Gyp are cats of unusual size and beauty. Fritz will roll over,
+jump through a hoop and turn somersaults at command. He also has the
+habit of jumping up to catch the smooth top of the dining-table
+with his paws and swinging suspended, while he surveys the prospects
+of his coming dinner. Two years ago there was mourning in the home
+of Heath. Fritz had suddenly disappeared. At night Gyp came into
+the house, sniffed at the basket, which she and Fritz had occupied
+together since the latter's kittenhood, and walked disconsolately
+away. The Heath family searched diligently, but Fritz could not be
+found.
+
+"When two years had passed by, all but Gyp had nearly forgotten
+the missing member of the household. She could not be induced to
+go near her basket, which was still kept beside the fire, and
+persistently refused to be comforted. One night recently Gyp jumped
+into her basket and, nestling down, began to purr contentedly. A
+few days afterward the Heaths, returning from an evening call, saw
+a cat which, in the darkness, they supposed to be Gyp, lying on the
+doorstep. When the door was opened the cat ran into the hallway and
+out again as quickly. A short time later Mrs. Heath heard the crying
+at the door and went down to bring in the homeless cat and give it
+something to eat. As soon as she opened the door the cat darted
+inside. When it came to the lighted apartments, Mrs. Heath exclaimed,
+'Why, Tom, that's Fritz!' Hearing his name, the overjoyed Fritz
+bounded into Mrs. Heath's lap, from hers to her husband's, turned
+somersaults, rolled over and performed all the tricks he had been
+taught, as if to thoroughly establish his identity or express his
+pleasure at getting home.
+
+"'It surely is Fritz,' thought the Heaths, and they examined the
+cat's right ear. It was split. There was little doubt now, but to
+make assurance doubly sure, a small stick was thrown down the stairs,
+into the dark hallway.
+
+"'Go get it, Fritz,' said Mr. Heath, and the cat darted down stairs,
+returned triumphantly with the stick balanced in its mouth, a trick,
+by the way, common enough with retrievers, but which few cats have
+ever been taught to perform. After a good supper, the reclaimed
+Fritz went straight to his basket behind the stove and cuddled down
+contented.
+
+"Gyp at first gave the intruder a sharp rap with her paw, but at once
+recognized her prodigal son, fell on his neck and kissed him. Fritz
+now stays very closely at home, for his two years' absence seems to
+have given him an increased regard for the family roof-tree."
+
+This wonderful power of memory in the Cat has seldom been surpassed
+by any other attribute in the feline, but there came under my
+personal observation the following astonishing proof of the
+intelligence and motherly love of the Cat for her young, the relation
+of which will undoubtedly find an echo in the memories of many of my
+readers.
+
+While residing on Lexington avenue near Twenty-fourth street, New
+York, I had a Pussy who presented the world with a litter of three
+as pretty kittens as ever were seen. Their beauty, however, did not
+compensate for their burden upon the household, because there was no
+yard to the house. I kept the little ones until they were a month
+old and had grown to be attractive, and offered them to friends and
+neighbors, all of whom admired, but regretted that they had neither
+use nor room for them. So, one day I tied about the neck of each
+cunning little kitten a bright ribbon, to improve their appearance,
+and having secured the mother cat in the kitchen, I took her babies
+in my overcoat pockets and carried them to the Twenty-first street
+side of Gramercy Park, where I deposited two of them inside the
+enclosure. I then went around to the other side of the great iron
+fence and placed the other baby in the park and returned to the
+house. The day was a cold one in Winter, and the avenue is a very
+busy one during the day, being well traveled by pedestrians and
+vehicles, and the park a considerable distance from my residence.
+Within an hour the mother, who was supposed to be securely imprisoned
+in the kitchen, was heard by the servant crying in the front area,
+and upon opening the basement door, I discovered the Cat with her
+three beautiful kittens, all safe and sound, returned and claiming my
+protection. How the Cat released herself from her imprisonment in the
+kitchen, and by what wonderful power she found the kittens, whom she
+must have brought through the street, at the risk of her life, one by
+one, is more than I could surmise, and there they were. My admiration
+of her was such that I took in the brood and continued to care for
+them a month longer, all the while endeavoring to find homes for the
+little ones, but with no success. Finally, recognizing the necessity
+of getting rid of the kittens, I carried out the babies, once more,
+in my pockets, and deposited them in an area of a house, ten blocks
+away, in a busy part of the city, near Fourth avenue. This time I
+made sure of the mother by locking her in a room, but, on returning
+to the house, two hours later, I found the three kittens there, and
+the mother looking at me appealingly. Although much disgusted at the
+determination of the mother, I kept her kittens until I had induced
+some friends to take them, after telling the story and persuading
+them that the children of such a mother must necessarily become
+wonderful Cats.
+
+Illustrative also of the intelligence, as well as the praiseworthy
+liberality and charitableness of the Cat, is the story in the Sun of
+Baltimore, Md., of June 22d, 1892, as follows:
+
+"Mr. James Forwood of Darlington, Hartford County, has a cat which
+has developed an interesting trait. Being kittenless, she adopted as
+her own a brood of motherless young chickens, which come to her when
+she purrs, and follow her around wherever she goes. When any of the
+brood stray into a neighbor's premises the cat follows, and, picking
+up each chick carefully by the back of its neck, as if it were a
+kitten, and in the same manner in which she had been carried when a
+kitten herself, deposits it safely upon its own premises. Calling the
+chicks to her, the cat lies down and hovers over them as tenderly and
+as carefully as their feathered mother would have done. The chicks
+appear to accept the situation and are thriving."
+
+
+
+
+VI.
+
+FRIENDS OF THE CAT.
+
+
+The unjust prejudice concerning Pussy extant in the United States
+and England is not common in other lands. In fact, nowhere outside
+of the two great countries named is the prejudice tolerated. In
+Arabia, the Cat is worshiped and treated with tenderest care and the
+consideration which is her due for duties well performed and properly
+appreciated. Arabians, who have always expressed a great fondness for
+the feline, in their legends trace back the origin of the Cat to the
+time of building the great ark by Noah, and they have a fiction that
+Pussy was sneezed out of the nostrils of the king of beasts, the lion.
+
+Whatever may be the origin of the Cat, one fact is undeniable, which
+is that she is not indigenous to America. Some naturalists declare
+that Pussy was brought over to America in a ship, and others have
+arrived at the conclusion that it was the wild-cat that took passage
+to our shores on a sailing vessel, and our kind little household pet
+has evoluted from the wild beast of the denser forests. The tutelary
+deity of the Cat is Diana, or Pacht, and, according to Plutarch,
+Pussy was not only sacred to the moon, but an emblem of it, and a
+figure of a Cat, fixed upon a sistrum, denoted the moon, just as a
+frog on a ring denoted a man in embryo. Hence Cats were treated with
+peculiar consideration in Egypt during the reign of the Pharaohs.
+Throughout Egypt, upon the death of the family pet, the entire
+household went into mourning, and the Cat's funeral was invariably
+celebrated with great pomp and impressive ceremonies. The bereaved
+owners of the deceased feline testified their sorrow and respect for
+the memory of the lost pet by shaving off their eyebrows. The body
+was always embalmed, and after the funeral placed in the temple of
+Babistis, where it was visited at stated intervals by members of the
+household and mourned over as one of the family.
+
+In the days of Moses and the prophets it was a very serious thing to
+kill a cat. Diodorus relates a story of a Roman soldier, a man of
+bravery, who accidentally killed a Cat and was tried, convicted and
+condemned to die. This sentence was executed as religiously as if the
+Cat had been a human being. It was, in those days, a common thing
+to mete out severe punishment for injuries done to the feline, and
+it is to be regretted that some of the stern laws of the Egyptians,
+relating to outrages perpetrated upon the innocent animals, have not
+descended to this land and generation, for the better protection
+of the person of an innocent animal that harms no one and is of
+inestimable value to mankind.
+
+The Arabs continue to venerate the Cat. Just out of Cairo stands a
+mosque, where, in modern times, Sultan El Daher provides all the Cats
+of Cairo and its vicinity in need of sustenance with a plentiful
+daily repast. From flat roof and from terrace, from the dusty streets
+and the multitudes of filthy alleys of the city, and from their
+thousands of hiding places, the hungry felines come, at the hour of
+prayer, to get their never-forgotten allowance of food, furnished
+by their ever-faithful friend of the Orient. It has been declared
+to be an outgrowth of superstition, but there is justice in the
+remark, "'tis true, 'tis pity, and pity 'tis, 'tis true," that the
+superstition exists only in the nobler breast of Sultan El Daher,
+who feeds his pets, the poor, needy and neglected waifs of other
+households, then, with a happy heart filled with the glow of a deed
+of charity well performed, he turns his face to the setting sun and
+prays for the blessing so richly earned.
+
+Napoleon Bonaparte is said to have hated a Cat with as great a
+fervor as was expressed by him for his Austrian and Russian foes.
+In him we have a strong contrast to the great Sultan, although the
+ridiculous superstition of the great soldier of France has gone into
+a proverb. Even Shylock, with all his sins and hardness of heart, had
+a good word for Pussy, and expressed his disgust of a cowardly man
+by saying, "Some men there are that are mad if they behold a cat--a
+harmless, necessary cat."
+
+France's greatest Cardinal, Richelieu, was of an opposite temperament
+to Napoleon, for he dearly loved the Cat. Mahomet possessed a strong
+passion for the feline, which has seldom been equaled. It is recorded
+of the immortal prophet that upon one occasion, when a particular
+favorite was lying asleep upon his sleeve, he cut off the sleeve and
+left Pussy in a peaceful slumber rather than disturb her rest. Horace
+Walpole had a favorite Pussy, and when she died he mourned her loss
+so much that the ever-living author of "Gray's Elegy in a Country
+Churchyard" wrote an ode on the death of Salina, the lovely Tabby of
+his friend. Many world-renowned people of all ages have been noted
+for possessing large families of Cats, a fact due, in some cases, to
+a superstition, but generally from an intense love for the innocent,
+beautiful and useful animal. The author of "The Doctor," Robert
+Southey, when he lived at Greta, near Keswick, possessed a large
+number of plump and healthy Cats, which the kitchen-maids nursed and
+the Keswick apothecary dosed.
+
+In fact, from time immemorial Pussy has been a companion of the
+learned. Petrarch had his pet embalmed and Andrea Doria, one of the
+rulers of Venice, not only had his dead Cat's portrait taken, but
+also preserved her skeleton among his choicest mementos. The Cat of
+Cardinal Wolsey sat by his side when he gave audience or received
+princes. Rousseau loved Cats, and it is said of Sir Isaac Newton that
+he cut a large hole in his barn for his old cat and a smaller one,
+beside it, for the young kittens. Edgar Allen Poe wrote a thrilling
+tale of a black Cat, and even the ambitious, bloodthirsty Lady
+Macbeth alludes kindly to the household pet. Dr. Johnson had a Cat
+upon which he doted, and being seemingly desirous of perpetuating
+her fame, he taught her to eat oysters, a feat never recorded of any
+other Cat in history. Henry James, the novelist, wrote with his Cat
+upon his shoulder. The effusively polite, sensitively dilettante,
+conscienceless and steel-hearted Chesterfield had one redeeming
+trait, which was his love for Pussy, if such a cold-blooded man
+could be possessed of the faculty of loving. When he died, he left
+a pension to his Cats and their posterity after them. Paul de Kock,
+the French novelist, had a family of thirty Cats, and De Musset wrote
+apostrophes to Cats, in verse.
+
+Chateaubriand was passionately fond of Cats, and when he was sent as
+an ambassador to the Pope, the latter could think of no more suitable
+present for the devoted son of the Church than his predecessor's
+favorite Cat, which present greatly pleased Chateaubriand and cost
+the great prelate nothing. There is no more familiar figure in the
+memory of an Englishman than Whittington, once Lord Mayor of London,
+with his Cat.
+
+The Greek monks of the Island of Cyprus used to train the Cats to
+hunt and kill the serpents with which they were plagued. In Sicily
+the Cat is sacred to Saint Martha, and whoever, either by design
+or accident, kills one, it is believed, undergoes seven years of
+punishment. In Hungary they believe that a Cat must necessarily be
+a good mouser, and she is highly prized there for her inestimable
+qualities.
+
+
+
+
+VII.
+
+SOME REMARKABLE TRUE STORIES.
+
+
+The delicate movement, characteristic reserve and native modesty
+of the Cat may account for the supposition of the ignorant and
+unappreciative that Pussy is stupid. This foolish supposition has
+been refuted by innumerable instances of her intelligence, which,
+in many cases on record and thoroughly authenticated, are marvelous
+in the extreme. I will not delve into ancient history for proofs of
+the astonishing intelligence of the Cat and relate what is already
+patent to the world, but will give some of the best authenticated
+incidents which have occurred within a few years in our own land.
+Very recently the New York Sun gave an authenticated account of
+a Cat owned by Mr. Chester F. Hall, of Danville, Ind., who, when
+she desires to enter the house, invariably rings the bell of the
+front door and is admitted by the servants. This, I imagine, is an
+expression of more intelligence than is often evinced by many of the
+Cat's traducers among the country bumpkins who, with the bell handle
+under their noses, have frequently been known to knock upon the door
+for admission to the house.
+
+The camaraderie of dogs and Cats, in every land, has been
+significantly narrated in every tongue, innumerable times. It has
+always been noticed that in such associations the dog have always
+bossed the Cat, demonstrating his arrogant spirit, resulting from
+his appreciation of the fact that he is the stronger animal and that
+"might makes right." But within my personal observation this bossism
+is of a good-natured character, and often amusing. Frequently, too,
+the canine in the full knowledge of his superior strength, uses it
+generously for the protection of the weaker comrade, and I propose to
+give an instance of this fact, together with an illustration of the
+characteristic insouciance of Pussy, and the sense of order and the
+amenities of private life as manifested by the stronger comrade.
+
+Some years ago my Skye terrier, "Gyp," had a litter of puppies, and
+we saved one of them, "Jessie," who was brought up with a pretty
+little kitten. From Jessie's birth she manifested a great liking for
+Kitty, and played with her as good-naturedly and freely as if she had
+been a dog. It is true that Gyp, the mother of Jessie, looked upon
+this fraternizing with disapprobation, often telling her puppy that
+she was lowering herself by such close intimacy with the Cat, but
+the intimacy went on and on. One never saw Kittie scratch or hurt
+Jessie, nor did the latter ever injure, nor even anger, the Cat.
+Pussy permitted Jessie to play all sorts of pranks with her tail, and
+the laughter of the entire household has often been provoked by the
+seeming cunning little ways of both. Jessie would hide behind the
+door, and as Pussy came gingerly along in search of her playfellow
+suddenly dash out upon Kittie, to her palpable consternation, and
+the two would roll over and over each other, on the kitchen floor,
+in each other's arms. Neither dog ever interfered with the food set
+apart for Kittie, nor was there ever a wistful glance at the dainties
+upon her plate.
+
+One remarkable circumstance, however, proved the dogs' ideas of "the
+right of domain," and demonstrated the fact that they considered
+the kitchen the proper place for Kittie. She had always been kept
+"downstairs," and never ventured to go above the kitchen floor,
+excepting upon one memorable occasion. The little dogs were permitted
+to remain in the dining room during the time when the family were
+eating. At all other times they were at liberty to roam about the
+house at their own sweet will. One day, the kitchen door being left
+open, Kittie thought she would make a new departure, and accordingly
+strolled up the kitchen stairs and into the dining room, tail erect
+and a "lovely day, to-day" kind of a look upon her smiling face.
+Pussy's appearance and her nonchalant impudence overpowered the dogs
+for a moment, and before they had recovered from their astonishment
+Pussy had pre-empted a soft cushion on a rocking chair, which was
+the especial resting place of the mother, Gyp, and always regarded
+as particularly sacred to her aristocratic ladyship. This was too
+much for the dogs. Every member of the family vacated that chair when
+Gyp claimed it, and as for Jessie, she never dared to get upon that
+sacred cushion.
+
+When the dogs had recovered their equilibrium, after their
+astonishment at the temerity of the "kitchen cat," as they evidently
+regarded her, they put their noses together and compared notes,
+after the fashion of canines, and then Gyp and Jessie proceeded
+to the development of their theory concerning Cats in the dining
+room. Together they went up to the chair, and each seized a corner
+of the cushion upon which Kittie had made herself comfortable and
+at home, and with a suggestion that she was not asked to sit down,
+deliberately pulled both Cat and cushion from the chair, landing
+Kittie unceremoniously upon the floor in a very indecorous manner and
+very much to her disgust. But the affair did not end here. Kittie
+looked from one to the other of her household companions as if
+doubting the evidence of her senses, and as much as to ask them if
+they did not feel ashamed of themselves for treating a lady in such
+an undignified manner? She cast a withering glance at them and sidled
+toward the table, as it seeking protection from some one of the
+family, who were at dinner, and with an injured air sat down at my
+side. This was altogether too much presumption for the dogs to stand,
+and their good nature left them as, prompted by the mother, Jessie
+sidled up to Kittie, who looked at the dogs, appealingly, while they
+said, as plainly as could be said by dogs, "You are not an upstairs
+Cat, Kittie--you are nothing but a kitchen Cat, and you have no
+rights here that we are bound to respect. Go downstairs, like a good
+little kitten, and the cook will feed you."
+
+To this remark Kittie shrugged her shoulders and refused to budge.
+Then came the funny part of it, which was not at all funny to the
+Cat. Jessie edged up to Kittie upon one side and Gyp sidled up to the
+other side of the Cat, and together they actually pushed her along to
+the kitchen stairs and forced her to descend to her own quarters on
+the floor below. Kittie struggled to get away from them and remain in
+the dining room, but they were too quick for her, and downstairs she
+went, full of dudgeon, and never after attempted to encroach upon the
+territory which the little dogs claimed for their own.
+
+This incident did not disturb the friendship existing between Jessie
+and Kittie, for they continued to be as fast friends as ever, but the
+Cat, certainly, had an idea that Jessie had been put up to the job by
+her mother, and I have no doubt that the cunning Jessie told her so.
+
+These two dogs were the terror of the Cats in the neighborhood, and
+it was no unusual occurrence to see the feline skurrying away from
+our "farm," with both sky terriers at their heels and almost within
+biting distance. Woe betide the Cat that either got their teeth into,
+for they were dead Cats when either Gyp or Jessie caught them, as
+many an occasion proved. Singularly, however, they never injured
+Kittie, but, to show that they cherished and protected her, I will
+mention one occurrence of the many which came under my own eye. It
+was in the summer time, when the windows of the kitchen were open.
+Both dogs were reposing in the doorway when there suddenly appeared
+upon the window sill, a Tomcat, who had ventured to come courting
+Kittie. The "Young Lochinvar" eyed Kittie lovingly, and approached
+the innocent young thing with a polite air, saying, no doubt, that
+he would like to persuade her to "tread but one measure with young
+Lochinvar," and that "in all the wide border his steed was the best."
+
+Kittie received the bold suitor, who had not noticed the dogs, in
+his eagerness to get near and his admiration of Kittie. The cunning
+Dulcinea eyed the canines out of a corner of one eye, while she
+had the other upon the approaching Tom, and before he had lisped a
+confession of his love she, with maidenly instinct and appropriate
+modesty, gave the customary wild scream, resembling that of the
+maiden in story, when "the villain still pursues her," and started
+to her feet. The dogs sprang up in an instant at the call for help
+uttered by Kittie, and in an instant they landed upon the astonished
+Lochinvar, who, it may be remarked, "never knew what struck him," for
+we put his cold Catship in the ash-barrel, a few moments later, and
+washed the noses of the dogs with a rough towel, and the remark that
+it was a cruel act, while laughing in our sleeves at the suddenness
+of the "taking off" and the affection of the little protectors, Gyp
+and Jessie.
+
+One of the most astonishing incidents upon record, proving the
+sagacity, as well as the courage of the Cat, is of recent occurrence
+and worthy of recital. The fearlessness of the feline, and the
+wonderful intelligence manifested in her attack upon the animal, in
+its only tender part, is something astonishing and unaccountable. In
+a combat with a dog, the Cat is frequently victor, but seldom has
+she demonstrated her power of conquering a saurian. The incident is
+narrated by a correspondent of the "New York Sun," under date of
+April 3, 1892, as follows:
+
+"One of the most remarkable combats ever witnessed in this country
+occurred on Holmes River, near this place, last week. In the battle a
+Cat and an alligator fought for three hours, with the final result in
+favor of the tabby.
+
+"The alligators have infested the river, and it is considered
+dangerous for any person or animal to go near the banks. The saurians
+are not large, but they appear to make up in activity what they lack
+in size. A house Cat belonging to Mr. Walton was in the habit of
+going to the river and feeding on mussels and such fish as it could
+get, and it was noticed several times that when the Cat moved along
+the bank a ripple in the water showed that an alligator kept pace
+with it in the stream. The Cat, however, was aware of the alligator's
+presence, but showed no fear.
+
+"On the day mentioned the Cat approached too near the water in its
+eagerness to get a fish, and was grasped by the hind legs by an
+alligator about three feet long. The Cat made a spring and got away,
+but its leg was badly bitten, and bled freely. The taste of blood
+seemed to put the alligator into a frenzy, for it came out on the
+bank and continued the pursuit. The Cat turned on its enemy, and then
+began one of the strangest sights seen in a long time. The Cat was
+so quick that it was impossible for the alligator to get a bite at
+it, and the result was that the saurian soon endeavored to beat a
+retreat to the water. But the Cat now began an offensive attack, and
+cut off the way, biting the alligator in the throat and tender spots
+under the arms, until the reptile was bleeding and almost exhausted.
+The fight continued, and when, at last, the alligator gave up, it
+was bleeding from a hundred wounds. The Cat was, seemingly, unhurt,
+except in the wounded leg, which was injured before the fight began."
+
+
+
+
+VIII.
+
+HOSPICE DU CHATS.
+
+
+In many civilized countries Cat Hospitals have been established, and
+for many years sustained by subscriptions from charitably disposed
+people. Attached to one of the Turkish mosques at Aleppo is a Cat
+Asylum, founded by a misanthropic old Turk, who placed a great
+value upon the Cat, because of the service it had been in ridding
+his granary of rats. In Philadelphia, Pa., there is a Cat Refuge,
+which was established some fifteen years ago, and during that time
+has cared for more than thirty thousand Cats. In the city of Paris,
+France, is a very extensive establishment called Hospice du Chats,
+whose name is an indication of its object. It has been in existence
+for many years, and is maintained by gifts from charitable people as
+well as by contributions from the Government and bequests from dead
+lovers of the household pet. This building, covering a very large
+space of land, is two stories in height and expensively built for the
+exclusive purpose of sheltering the Cats of France, and there they
+have been domiciled, nursed through sickness and cared for to extreme
+old age, as tenderly as ever human beings were nurtured. Rooms are
+assigned to the sexes and different nationalities, halls and chambers
+are warmed by steam, meals are served with religious regularity,
+and the institution is run with the same regard to decorum and
+preciseness in every detail as is manifested in a well-regulated
+hotel. Many thousands of the feline race have been born, nursed,
+grown to old age and died there, within the hospitable walls of
+this admirable hospice, while a hundred thousand more have found
+good homes and tender care throughout sunny France, by means of the
+solicitous administration of the officers of the institution. London,
+also, boasts of a similar charity, although the hospice in Paris is
+the model one of its kind, by which all the others take pattern.
+An institution of this kind was projected some three years ago by
+some charitably-disposed ladies of New York, but failed to meet the
+required indorsement of the authorities, and being opposed by the
+"Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals," which claims to
+have control of the stray Cats, by virtue of its charter, the embryo
+hospice, or Cat Hospital, as it was called, died in its inception,
+very much to the disgust of many wealthy ladies, whose admiration
+of the feline pet had induced them to subscribe large amounts for
+the establishment of an institution similar to that of the Paris
+"Hospice du Chats." Perhaps, at some future time, Mr. Bergh's
+successor may become so far yielding as to permit the erection of a
+suitable institution, upon the plan of the French hospice, where sick
+Cats may be nursed, tramp Cats may be cut off in their wickedness,
+incurably afflicted Cats may be chloroformed and healthy and restored
+Cats may procure good homes throughout the country, while the breed
+of the animal may be materially and effectually improved. Should
+these objects be accomplished through the instrumentality of such a
+worthy asylum for the sick and outcast of our household pets, the
+delighted ladies at the head of such an institution may be induced to
+add to the benefits of the hospice a thorough course of instruction
+in Chesterfieldian politeness and regard for the feelings of their
+immediate neighbors, to be observed, most particularly, during those
+hours which, by the usage of a well-regulated community, have been
+devoted exclusively to sleep. This course of "belles-lettres" would
+obviate the dernier resort of "belling the Cat," and bring joy to
+the hearthstone of many a would-be slumberer at the witching hour of
+midnight, when the ghosts do walk and firearms are frequently heard
+in the land, the song of the nightingale being supplanted by the
+peculiar organ of the unruly and homeless Cat.
+
+A scientist by the name of Prof. R.L. Garnier, a native of this
+country, if I am rightly informed, who has devoted a lifetime to
+the development of his theory that monkeys have a language of
+their own, has recently been given great encouragement in the
+pursuit of his inquiries by the Government of this country. A large
+appropriation was awarded to him for the necessary apparatus, of a
+scientific nature, and for the purpose of defraying his expenses of
+travel through Africa, for the prosecution of his experiments, and
+his demonstration, as he fondly hoped, that these animals have a
+language of communication of ideas between themselves. Already he has
+discovered one word of their peculiar language, which gives promise
+of better results after he has been enabled to properly carry out his
+experiments. He departed upon his journey fully equipped with all the
+scientific instruments and aids which money, lavishly expended by the
+Government, could procure. It is expected that his experiences will
+be announced to the astonishment of the world and revolutionize the
+old and fallacious beliefs that animals cannot talk and express their
+feelings one to the other.
+
+Without disparagement of the worthy object of this scientist, I
+desire to call attention to the fact that, like the poor, we have
+the Cat always with us, and I would press the consideration of
+their necessities as being pertinent to the question of the comfort
+and enjoyment of the human race. That the Government should have
+considered the subject of the monkey language of such importance as
+to warrant the expenditure of a great sum of money to Prof. Garnier
+for the development of this theory is evidence that the same benign
+Republic should award a much larger sum for the care, protection and
+improvement of the breed of our domestic pets and more particularly
+for the development of my theory of the language of the Cat, which
+has occupied the lonely hours of many a scientist in this country,
+and been my study for years past. When the proper time arrives, I
+shall hope for encouragement from our Government, which has been my
+Government for the past half century, for the further development of
+the theories, proofs of which I shall submit to the public. While
+I favor missionary work, I may be like many others who claim that
+"Charity begins at home," and recommend the Government to make an
+instant application of the doctrine, to the end that it may have a
+wholesome effect, intimating that the protecting Protection is that
+which protects our own, and particularly our household pets.
+
+
+
+
+IX.
+
+ASTOUNDING REVELATIONS BY THE CAT.
+
+
+Under the classification of remarkable instances of the intelligence
+of animals, I omitted one instance, pertinent to this story and
+astonishing to me, unless it may be regarded as an accident. I will
+give it without the least coloring of the truth. The manuscript of
+the preceding part of this treatise was prepared some time ago, and
+placed in a drawer of my desk with many other rolls of writing, the
+drawer being filled with them. For several successive nights I heard
+a peculiar noise in this drawer, but, although the sounds emitted
+seemed to indicate the gnawing of a mouse, I could not bring myself
+to the belief that such a busy little animal could gain access to
+the drawer, or would be able to find anything attractive to him
+there. However, my amanuensis, having occasion to open the drawer one
+day, exclaimed with surprise that the mice had been making a nest
+in the drawer. Upon examination we found that the paper gnawed was
+this article treating upon the enemy of the mouse--the Cat--while
+the other rolls of manuscript remained untouched. Now, whether this
+act was committed in a spirit of vandalism and to demonstrate the
+hatred of the destroyers for the subject of the story, or with a mere
+wanton desire to destroy my property, I cannot surmise. Certain it
+is, however, that they singled out this matter about the Cat, and
+left uninjured the other manuscript, thus demonstrating the fact,
+it seems to me, that the Cat story and none other was the object of
+their search.
+
+It was at the time when my attention was called to the subject of
+the simian language that my memory recurred to an important document
+in my possession relating to the Cat. After a prolonged search, with
+a determination to rescue it from the oblivion into which I had
+unintentionally cast it, I, with more success than generally rewards
+such searches, discovered the document, and will have the pleasure
+of presenting it to the public, giving it a free translation from
+the French, in which language it is written. The history of this
+wonderful document is short. Some years ago I was the editor of a New
+York morning newspaper, and one day there chanced to call upon me
+at my office a French gentleman of about fifty years of age, rather
+short in stature, fairly well dressed, with a benevolent countenance,
+bright, black eyes, regular features with the exception of a
+prominent nose and the unmistakable stamp of a litterateur. His hands
+and feet were small, and he had a nervous air about him while he
+gesticulated in the expression of his ideas, and spoke in a mixture
+of French and English, just as all pure Frenchmen are accustomed to
+do.
+
+He had previously sent in to me his card, which read thus:
+
+  "Alphonse Leon Grimaldi, F.R.S., F.G.S., M.O.S.,
+    D.H. du C., M.F.A.S., M.F.A., et al.
+      "Rue de Honoré, 13, Paris.
+        "Metropolitan Hotel, N.Y."
+
+Prof. Grimaldi, the French gentleman, presented himself to my
+wondering eyes as I rose to meet him, and extended his hand with a
+Chesterfieldian bow, exclaiming, as nearly as my memory serves:
+
+"Jais ver happy for ze honaire of ze attention pour le editaire of
+one great journal."
+
+I replied, of course, that I was proud to meet him, and asked what he
+desired to know, and how I could serve so great a scientist, for the
+reputation of this great man and his wonderful scientific researches
+and discoveries had reached my ears upon the wings of many foreign
+messages even then.
+
+As I replied to the Professor in his native tongue, he expressed
+himself as being more at his ease, although he offered to converse
+with me in English, a language in which, he said, "he was perfectly
+at home, and spoke fluently," as all Frenchmen pride themselves
+upon being able to do after a month's practice, without taking into
+consideration that Webster claims words in our language to the
+extent of six figures. However, I considered my French much more
+comprehensible than his English, and the conversation was continued
+in that language, very much to his delight.
+
+He informed me that he had made a life study of the animal kingdom,
+and that, for many years, unknown to his most intimate friends and
+associates in the scientific world, he had made a particular study
+of the Cat and its habits, while of late years he had come to the
+conclusion that Cats have a language all their own. To my surprise
+he informed me that he had demonstrated in a paper, which he drew
+from his pocket, the fact that upon his theories, and by a close
+observation of the rules set down in his manuscript upon the Cat
+language, the whole world might acquire it. He presented me with
+the document in recognition of my sympathy with him in a subject
+so near his heart, and expressed a hope that I might find time in
+the near future to examine and print his theories and the results
+of his investigations. The reason for his keeping the facts of his
+researches a secret from his most intimate friends and his scientific
+brethren, he remarked, was that if he had not carried the subject
+to a successful termination, he never could have lived through
+the sarcasm and taunts of these men of science, who would have
+overwhelmed him with abuse because of his failure.
+
+I glanced at the title of the paper, and, after thanking him for his
+valuable gift, and promising to read it at some leisure hour, I bade
+him adieu, and resumed my duties, having placed the paper in the
+editorial desk.
+
+To those who are aware of the numberless documents and the thousands
+of articles upon various subjects which accumulate in and about
+the desk of an editor, I need not explain that this paper was soon
+buried, so that when my memory recurred to it, a month later, the
+document could not be found, and I finally gave up my quest, and
+considered the paper last beyond recovery. Imagine my rejoicing,
+however, when, but a few months ago, I found it intact, and perused
+its contents with great surprise. I was the more rejoiced at its
+recovery because it verifies my own theories, and proves beyond a
+doubt that the Cat has a language which may be spoken by anybody who
+will make a study of it. What wonders this discovery will work in
+every community of the civilized world may better be imagined than
+described. The accumulated secrets of many years will be told, and
+crimes and misdemeanors which until now have baffled inquisitors will
+be unearthed, and the perpetrators punished; little peccadillos will
+be given to the gossipers, and even the tender passages between John
+and his girl in the parlor or the sitting-room, in the arbor, or upon
+the way through "lover's land," will become subject for tattle among
+gossipers.
+
+
+
+
+X.
+
+PROFESSOR GRIMALDI'S WONDERFUL DISCOVERIES
+
+
+It is scarcely necessary to recount the wonderful researches of the
+great Prof. Grimaldi, the great French naturalist. His name has
+become a household word, and his fame world-wide. When I unearthed
+his carefully prepared paper it was yellow with age, but his
+chirography was a marvel of neatness, and distinct as copper plate.
+I have made a literal translation of it, and will give it in his own
+words without emendations.
+
+
+THE CAT
+
+By Alphonse Leon Grimaldi, F.R.S., F.G.S., M.O.S., D.H. du C.,
+M.F.A.S., M.F.A., et al.
+
+I was born with an intense passion for animals. I am a Frenchman,
+therefore am I a man of strong passions. I have not married. My
+love is for the animal kingdom, and it has been returned to me one
+hundred fold all my life. In woman there is deceit, and in man
+deception rules his nature. If I treat an animal with kindness, I
+will, invariably, be overwhelmed with gratitude. The animal never
+bites the hand that feeds it--the human being frequently does.
+Therefore, I live among animals and center my affections in them.
+I have made my unalterable choice. I teach the gentler manners
+and the magnanimity, perhaps the greater intelligence of those of
+God's creatures who are far above their self-constituted masters,
+and their inexhaustible love of even the hand that smites, if it
+be the hand of a beneficiary. You have repeatedly noticed that a
+large and powerful dog can never be persuaded to attack or oppress
+a smaller or a feebler one. Tell me how frequently you have known
+a man of influence, power, riches or strength, to oppress and take
+advantage of a feebler or poorer one? Is it not a daily, nay, hourly
+occurrence? Have you ever seen a healthy animal oppress a sickly
+one? Never! Times without number you have been an eyewitness to the
+tender care and solicitude of the well for the sick animal, and
+as frequently you have seen the unfortunate provided with every
+necessary by his more fortunate comrades.
+
+How often do you find these traits in the human being? For this,
+and for many other reasons with which I might tire you, I love all
+animals but man.
+
+Men declare that only the biped, man, is endowed with reason. It
+is false. It is so declared, in order that man may possess one
+characteristic that will elevate him above, and distinguish him from
+what he chooses, falsely, to call the lower animals.
+
+Your Noah Webster, who padded your dictionary in order to make a
+formidable book, like many another man, says that animals are not
+possessed of reasoning powers, but have only instinct. He gives
+the definition of instinct as follows: "INSTINCT. A certain power
+or disposition of mind by which, independent of all instructions
+or experience, without deliberation, and without having any end in
+view, animals are unerringly directed to do spontaneously whatever is
+necessary for the preservation of the individual or the continuation
+of the kind."
+
+This is your American authority, and you must accept it, for you
+have adopted the dictionary. By this definition, and with only one
+question, I will prove to you that animals have reasoning powers,
+just as men have. Have not animals an end in view when they gather
+their food and build their homes for the winter months, when they
+rear their young, anticipate the coming of the night and of that
+longer night constituting the darkness of age and death, when
+preparing for the coming of their Master, and when, with a grand
+evidence of their superiority over man, they anticipate the changes
+of the weather?
+
+The intelligent man admits that animals not only have minds, but
+that they reason also. The sooner the whole world admits this fact
+the sooner we will arrive at the truth in the premises, and give
+the feline her due as well as be just to other animals. The study
+of natural history unfolds to the mind a new universe of beauty,
+interest and profit. The beautiful book of nature is spread out in
+inexhaustible profusion to all creatures, and no one can claim a
+monopoly of this grand study. Other animals read it constantly, and
+seem to understand it better than man. Man has not been able, with
+all his knowledge of science, to make a barometer which will give
+as unerring calculations concerning the weather as will the animals
+which he considers beneath him in intelligence. I instance more
+particularly the wild goose, who will indicate the temperature of the
+season, and I will remark that there is no compass or needle which
+can indicate the course of a pigeon while it navigates the air equal
+to its own instinct. In the hydraulics of nature, the beaver stands
+foremost of all living creatures, and the bee is the greatest builder
+in the world. Do you not admit that "instinct" will no longer answer
+as a name for intelligence in what you call the "brute" animals? Is
+it without deliberation and without having an end in view that, when
+you take a young pigeon from the cote in which it was hatched, and
+carrying it in a coop to a distance of four hundred miles from its
+home, you free it, and it takes its flight in a bee line for the cote
+in which it was born? What shall that quality of mind be called?
+
+Dogs, Cats and other animals have been carried for hundreds of miles
+from their homes, and but a few days elapsed before they return to
+the place from whence they were taken. Have they "no end in view,"
+and is this done "without deliberation?"
+
+There is a species of fish-hawk, in your Northern lakes, which has
+most remarkable eyes, microscopic as well as telescopic. You may
+often see this fellow, early in the morning, hovering over the placid
+water of some lonely lake, when he will suddenly dart off, leave the
+water and take up his position upon the bare limb of a blighted tree,
+and watch the track over which he flew. Presently you will see him
+leave his high perch and, with the accuracy and velocity of an arrow,
+strike the bosom of the lake, grasp a fish and bear it to his perch.
+Nature has furnished this wise bird with a bait which enables him to
+become a successful fisherman. He has in his throat, or oesophagus, a
+small sac, in which he secretes a kind of oil. This oil he drops upon
+the surface, the fishes are attracted to it, and at once there is a
+great commotion in the water. The hawk, seeing this, takes advantage
+of the situation, and pounces upon his prey.
+
+It is silly in man to assume that all he sees is but the effect of
+law. It is more sensible to assume that there is an intelligence
+behind law and matter. The intelligence shown in plants cannot be
+denied. Take, for instance, the aquatic plants. They will travel long
+distances over walls and other impediments before they will stop
+their growth.
+
+That animals have a moral sense is evidenced in the fact of the
+prominence in their natures of the attributes of reason, memory,
+invention, motive, ingenuity, will and gratitude. Granting these
+premises, and grant them you must from the proofs which I have
+submitted to you, and which have come under my own observation, you
+must admit that animals reason and think and give the same evidence
+of free intelligence observable in human nature.
+
+That dogs, Cats, horses, elephants, birds and even pigs can be taught
+to do most wonderful things, millions of people can attest from
+personal observation, and you have the proof in your own minds, to
+show free intellectual ability on the part of wild and tame animals.
+
+In my love for the Cat and my preference for that beautiful animal
+above all others, I do not stand alone. Nearly all men of note
+among the learned, as well as others, both in ancient and modern
+times, have signified their preference for the Cat in the strongest
+terms. Mahomet almost worshipped the Cat, and declared that his own
+should have a prominent place in his heaven. Richelieu possessed a
+house full of Cats, with twenty favorites, whom he cherished with
+great care and fed with his own hands. Shakespeare, Milton, Byron,
+Moore, Talleyrand, Edgar Allen Poe, Chateaubriand, Robert Southey,
+Dr. Johnson, Benjamin Franklin, Julius Caesar, Thomas Gray, Sir
+Isaac Newton, Sir Walter Raleigh, Cardinal Wolsey, Rousseau, Lord
+Chesterfield, Whittington, Lord Mayor of London, Plutarch, and
+thousands of others, have expressed their admiration of my favorite.
+Ancient history tells us of more than one nation that sainted the
+Cat, while others still hold the animal in high veneration. Certainly
+it must be admitted that the Cat possesses some wonderful attributes
+the evidence of which prompts its distinction. I claim for the Cat
+a higher order of intellect than exists in any other animal. While
+I love the dog, and claim for him a greater degree of intelligence
+than may be accorded to the horse, I class the Cat and the dog to be
+as distinct in their individuality and with as much difference as
+you see existing between man and woman. The organism of the Cat is
+of a very delicate nature, and, therefore, more susceptible to all
+influences. They are quicker of perception than any other animal,
+and, therefore, they more readily acquire knowledge.
+
+By an extended series of experiments I have demonstrated this fact,
+and would give the results of my labor were I not positive that my
+readers have made a comparison of the dog and the Cat, and arrived at
+the same conclusion without anything more than a casual observation.
+In experimenting, however, my attention was directed with more
+particularity to the manner of communication of ideas between Cats,
+and what was my surprise to discover that they have a language of
+their own, embracing not only words but, in a large degree, signs.
+You may the better understand me when I call attention to the fact
+that there are few words, comparatively, in the French language, but
+there is, among Frenchmen, a sign language; as, for instance, there
+is no word to express the meaning of our shrug of the shoulders and
+the extending of the hand and forearms. Words cannot express the
+feelings of the heart when men and women of every nativity bow their
+heads before their God. Because of this predominance of signs in the
+language of the Cat, it will be difficult for me to describe their
+mode of idea-communication; but I will make the attempt, and endeavor
+to bring it as clearly as possible to your minds, in order that you
+may comprehend it as distinctly as it presents itself to mine.
+
+
+
+
+XI.
+
+SIGNS AND SOUNDS.
+
+
+Language signifies the expression of ideas by sounds and by certain
+articulate sounds which are used as the signs or the ideas, sounds
+being regarded as mere aids and of secondary importance to signs,
+which are, primarily, of the greatest importance in language.
+
+By articulate sounds I mean those modulations of the simple voice or
+of sounds emitted from the thorax, formed by means of the mouth and
+its several organs, namely, the teeth, the tongue and the palate.
+When we give a name to anything harsh or boisterous we, of course,
+use a harsh or boisterous sound, the better to describe our meaning.
+By the use of such words as express such sounds we convey the ideas
+intended to be expressed. It is purely natural to imitate, by the
+sound of the voice, the quality of the sound or noise which any
+external object makes, and to form its name accordingly. In every
+language will be found a multitude of words constructed upon this
+principle. We call a certain bird a cuckoo because of the peculiar
+sound which he emits. Regard the fact that in English one kind of
+bird is said to "whistle," another to "chirp," a serpent to "hiss,"
+a fly to "buzz," a bee to "hum," falling timber to "crash," a stream
+to "flow," hail to "rattle," rain to "patter," a bell to "tinkle" or
+"jingle," or "toll," or to "clash" with another, a board to "creak,"
+thunder to "roll," lightning to "flash" and a cataract to "roar." In
+these instances the analogy between the word and the thing expressed
+is most plainly discernible to the ear. Notice, also, if you please,
+that in the names of objects which address the sight only, when
+neither noise nor motion are concerned, and still more in the term
+applied to moral ideas, this analogy appears to fail. This shows a
+superiority of signs over sounds, and is one reason for according to
+signs, over sounds, a primary importance. I have noticed, however,
+that many learned men have been of the opinion that though in such
+cases the meaning becomes more obscure, yet it is not altogether
+lost, but that throughout the radical words of all languages there
+may be traced some degree of correspondence with the object signified.
+
+Perhaps no language is so peculiar a mixture as your own, by which
+I mean the English, which is neither pure nor indigenous. The rule
+applies to other languages to a far less degree, but still it
+applies. As the multitude of names increases in every nation and
+the immense field of language is filled up--if it ever gets filled
+up--words by the thousands, fanciful and irregular methods of
+derivation and composition, come to deviate widely from the primitive
+character of their roots and lose all analogy or resemblance to sound
+in the thing signified. It is in such a heterogeneous state that we
+find words of sound-signs in language.
+
+Nature taught the members of the animal kingdom to communicate
+their feelings, one to another, by those expressive cries and
+gestures which are so descriptive. Afterward, names of objects were
+invented by slow degrees, in aid of signs. This mode of speaking by
+natural signs could not be all at once applied, for language, in
+its infancy, must have been extremely crude, and there certainly
+was a period in the history of all rude nations when conversation
+was carried on by the use of a very few words, intermixed with a
+multitude of exclamations and earnest gestures significant of the
+meaning intended to be conveyed.
+
+In the early days, the small stock of words which were in use,
+rendered signs absolutely necessary for explaining the conceptions
+and rude, uncultivated beings, not having signs at hand, with the
+few words which they knew it was naturally labor to make themselves
+understood by varying their tones of voice and accompanying their
+voices with the most significant gesticulations they could make.
+
+The primitive search was for signs and sounds which bore an analogy
+to the thing signified. The pronunciation of the earliest sounds
+of the languages was accompanied with more gesticulations and with
+more and greater inflections of the voice than we now use. Certainly
+there was more action in it, and it was conducted upon more of a
+crying or a singing tone. Necessity first gave rise to this primitive
+yet admirable way of speaking, and it may be said of it that it was
+action explanatory of meaning.
+
+Inflections of voice are so natural that to some nations it has
+appeared easier to express different ideas by varying the tones in
+which they pronounce the same word than to contrive words for all
+of their ideas. I instance the Chinese in particular. The number of
+words in their language is not great, but in speaking they vary each
+of their words by not less than five different tones, by which they
+make the same word signify five different things. This gives the
+appearance of singing, or music, to their speech, so noticeable in
+their conversation, for these inflections of voice, which, in the
+infancy of language, were no more than harsh or disconsonant cries,
+must, as language gradually becomes more polished, pass into smoother
+and more musical sounds. Hence is formed what is styled the prosody
+of language.
+
+It is remarkable and deserves attention that both in the Greek and
+the Roman languages this musical and gesticulating pronunciation was
+retained in a very high degree. The Greeks, it is well known, were a
+more musical people than the Romans, and carried their attention to
+the tone and pronunciation much farther in every public exhibition.
+Aristotle, in his poetics, considers the music of tragedy one of
+its chief and essential parts. The case was more than parallel in
+regard to gestures, for strong tones and animated gestures always go
+together. At last gesture came to engross the stage wholly, for under
+the reigns of Augustus and Tiberius the favorite entertainment of the
+public was pantomime, carried on entirely by gesticulations.
+
+
+
+
+XII.
+
+DESCRIPTIVE LANGUAGES.
+
+
+A Frenchman both varies his accents and gesticulates while he speaks
+much more than an Englishman, and an Italian a great deal more than
+either. Musical pronunciations and expressive gesture are, to this
+day, the distinction of Italy, and this combination of sign and its
+aid, sound, the latter being notes for its music, make the sweetest
+and most liquid language in existence. The want of a proper name for
+every object, obliged them to use one name for many objects, and, of
+course, to express themselves by comparisons, metaphors, allusions
+and all those substantive forms of speech which render language
+figurative.
+
+Poetry is more ancient than prose, and here we have a remarkable
+order of speech, such as "fruit give me." I, therefore, conclude, as
+the first fundamental principle in the organization and procession
+of word-signs, that this would be the order in which words should be
+most commonly arranged at the beginning of language, and accordingly,
+we find, in fact, that in this order words are arranged in most of
+the ancient tongues--the Russian, Slavonic, Gaelic, and many others.
+In the Latin the arrangement which most commonly obtains is to place
+first in the sentence that word which expresses the principal object,
+together with its circumstance, and afterward the person or thing
+which acts upon it.
+
+I desire to impress most particularly upon the reader the value of
+signs and sounds in the language, for he would be a fool, indeed, who
+would not mark the significance of a tone or a gesture.
+
+The word-signs in the English language number thirty-eight
+thousands. This includes, of course, not only the radical words,
+but all the derivatives, except the preterites and participles of
+verbs, to which must be added some few terms which, though set
+down in your dictionary, are either obsolete or have never ceased
+to be considered foreign. They have been introduced into your Noah
+Webster, "unabridged," together with many thousands of conjunctive
+and scientific words, for the sole purpose of making a big book
+and claiming that there are one hundred thousand word-signs in the
+English language. Of the thirty-eight thousands about twenty-three
+thousands are of Anglo-Saxon origin. The majority of the remainder,
+in what exact proportion I cannot say, are Latin and Greek, but the
+largest share is Latin. The names of the greater part of the objects
+of sense, in other words, the terms which occur most frequently in
+discourse, or which recall the most vivid conceptions, in the English
+vocabulary, are Anglo-Saxon. The names of the most striking objects
+in visible nature, of the chief agencies at work and of the changes
+which pass over it, are Anglo-Saxon.
+
+This language has given names to the heavenly bodies, namely, the
+sun, the moon and the stars, to three out of every four elements,
+namely, earth, fire and water; to three out of every four seasons,
+namely, spring, summer and winter, and, indeed, to all the natural
+divisions of time, except one, as day, night, morning, evening,
+twilight, noon, midday, midnight, sunrise, sunset, some of which are
+among the most poetical terms in the language.
+
+To the same language we are indebted for the names of light, heat,
+cold, frost, rain, snow, hail, sleet, thunder, lightning, as well
+as almost all those objects which form the component parts of the
+beautiful and external scenery as seen in land, hill and dale,
+wood and stream. It is from this language you derive the word most
+expressive of the earliest and dearest connections and the strongest
+and most powerful feelings of nature, and which are, consequently,
+invested with your oldest and most complicated associations. In
+this language we find the names of father, mother, husband, wife,
+brother, sister, son, daughter, child, home, kindred, friends. It has
+furnished the greater part of those metonymies and other figurative
+expressions by which is represented to the imagination, and that in
+a single word the reciprocal duties and enjoyments of hospitality,
+friendship or love. Such are hearth, roof and fireside. The chief
+emotions of which we are susceptible, as love, hope, fear, sorrow,
+shame, and what is of more consequence to the orator and the poet,
+as well as in common life, the outward signs by which emotion is
+indicated, are almost all Anglo-Saxon. Such are tear, smile, blush,
+to laugh, to weep, to sigh, to groan.
+
+Most of those objects about which the practical reason of man is
+employed in common life receive their names from the Anglo-Saxon.
+
+
+
+
+XIII.
+
+LANGUAGE OF DIVINE ORIGIN.
+
+
+One of our greatest poets says,
+
+     "'Tis not enough no harshness gives offense,
+     The sound must seem an echo of the sense."
+
+The words buzz, crackle, crash, blow, rattle, roar, hiss, whistle,
+and many others of a like nature and construction, were evidently
+formed to imitate the sounds themselves. Sometimes the word
+expressing an object is formed to imitate the sound produced by that
+object, as waye, cuckoo, whippoorwill, whisper, hum. I have been thus
+particular in calling the attention of the reader to these beautiful
+characteristics of the Anglo-Saxon because it is the language of the
+Cat in so far as word-signs are used in it for want of action to
+express the ideas or as conjunctives more particularly. The smooth
+and liquid passages from your poets, which express onomatopoeia, are
+but echoes from that most beautiful of all languages, that of the
+Cat. Such are the word-signs of Goldsmith,
+
+     "The whitewashed wall, the nicely sanded floor,
+     The varnished clock that clicked behind the door."
+
+To the credit of the Cat language it must be said that, while it
+is esteemed a great beauty in writing and conversation, as well as
+speaking, when the word-signs selected for the expression of an idea
+convey, by their sound, some resemblance to the subject which they
+express, the Cat language contains none but such words. You will
+remember the most wonderful poem written in the English language, and
+notice the word-painting in the following extract from "Gray's Elegy
+in a Country Churchyard,"
+
+     "For who, to dumb forgetfulness a prey,
+       This pleasing, anxious being e'er resigned,
+     Left the warm precincts of the cheerful day,
+       Nor cast one longing, lingering look behind!"
+
+Pope, also, in his "Essay on Criticism," in a manner though different
+yet scarcely less expressive, gives a verbal representation of his
+idea, by the selection of his terms in the following:
+
+     "These equal syllables alone require,
+     Though oft the ear the open vowels tire,
+     While expletives their feeble aid do join,
+     And ten low words oft creep in one dull line."
+
+And, once again, Pope says,
+
+     "A needless Alexandrian ends the song,
+     That, like a wounded snake, drags his slow length along.
+     Soft is the strain when zephyrs gently blow,
+     And the smooth streams in smoother numbers flow,
+     But when loud surges lash the sounding shore,
+     The hoarse, rough verse should, like the torrent, roar.
+     When Ajax strives some rock's vast weight to throw,
+     The line, too, labors, and the words move slow.
+     Not so when swift Camilla scours the plain,
+     Flies o'er the unbending corn, and skims along the main."
+
+I am of the opinion that language is of Divine origin, and that
+it was put into the mouth of the Cat, the same as it was put
+into the mouth of Adam, by the Almighty. In this opinion I am
+encouraged by many of your most prominent writers. In fact, it is
+the only sensible theory upon which we can stand. But the very
+first expression of a desire was a sign by action of the muscles,
+frequently followed by a sound-sign. This has often been demonstrated
+when infants have been placed, for a year or more, in a room where
+no speech or expressive action has met either eye or ear, and it has
+not yet been doubted. Many men have written upon the subject of the
+origin of language, from every point of view, the majority of these
+endeavoring to account for its existence without allowing that it
+is of Divine origin. Undoubtedly the first man, Adam, could talk as
+naturally as he could hear, see and taste. Speech was a part of his
+endowment. Is there anything more wonderful in man's talking than
+in a bird singing, save that speech is a higher order of utterance?
+Dumb nature, so called, performs marvels every day as wonderful as
+man talking. The honey bee builds its cell, ignorant of the fact that
+such a construction is a solution of a problem which had troubled
+men for centuries to solve--namely, at what point should certain
+lines meet so as to give the most room with the least material and
+have the greatest strength in building? This problem is said to have
+been worked out by a Mr. McLaughlin, a noted Scotch mathematician,
+who arrived at his conclusion by a laborious and careful fluctionary
+calculation. To his surprise and the surprise of the whole world,
+such lines and such a building were found in the common bee cell. Is
+there anything preposterous in my assertion that the same Creator
+who gave to the bee the mathematical instinct, could endow animals
+with the instinct of speech? In proportion as the English language
+has clung to the purest of Anglo-Saxon words it has gained strength
+throughout the world, while there have gone down before it the real
+British, the Cymeric or Welsh, Erse or Irish, the Gaelic of Scotland,
+and the Manx of the Isle of Man. The British Keltic is entirely gone,
+and the rest are only local. Besides these, it ousted from the island
+of Norse the Norman French and several other tongues which had sought
+to plant themselves on English soil.
+
+My illustrious comrade, Prevost Paradol, one of our most learned
+Frenchmen, says: "Neither Russia nor united Germany, supposing
+that they should attain the highest fortune, can pretend to impede
+that current of things, nor prevent that solution, relatively near
+at hand, of the long rivalry of European races for the ultimate
+colonization and domination of the universe. The world will not
+be Russian, nor German, nor French, alas! nor Spanish. It will be
+Anglo-Saxon."
+
+It was one of Britain's greatest poets who wrote the following
+characteristic lines expressive of the force of languages:
+
+     "Greek's a harp we love to hear,
+     Latin is a trumpet clear;
+     Spanish, like an organ, swells,
+     Italian rings its bridal bells;
+     France, with many a frolic mien,
+     Tunes her sprightly violin;
+     Loud the German rolls his drum,
+     When Russia's clashing cymbals come
+     But Britain's sons may well rejoice,
+     For English is the human voice."
+
+It is a noticeable fact that there have been five hundred distinct
+languages, and about three thousand five hundred colloquials, or
+about five thousand different forms of speech since Adam's time. At
+the present time five hundred of the primary are dead, so that there
+are about nine hundred now spoken on all the earth, with about two
+thousand five hundred colloquials.
+
+Canon Farrar says: "We may, therefore, assert, as Dante did, more
+than five centuries ago,
+
+     "That man speaks, is nature's prompting;
+     Whether thus or thus she leaves to you
+     As you do most affect it."
+
+I am surprised at some of the heedlessness of your philologists, and
+do not wonder that your children have a hard time of it acquiring
+your language when they are so carelessly misdirected in many
+instances, misled in many more and given rules which even the fully
+developed mind of a man is unable to comprehend. It is not from one
+alone of your linguists that I take this definition of the word
+"language." "Language is the expression of our ideas by articulate
+sounds, such as the signs of the ideas." Your Noah Webster, who
+gathered together all dictionaries extant, including all scientific
+words and definitions, and dumped them into his big book, gives the
+definition of the word "language" as follows: "The expression of
+ideas by words or significant articulate sounds for the communication
+of thought."
+
+Now, if these definitions are correct, and you choose to accept them
+as being so, what becomes of the "language" of the deaf and dumb?
+
+
+
+
+XIV.
+
+POWER OF SPEECH IN THE FELINE.
+
+
+It is not true that all animals have vocal chords. Some are
+marsupial, such as the kangaroo, and have membranous vocal chords,
+which stretch upon themselves and so cannot be stretched by the
+arytenoid muscles. A few of them are mammalia, such as the giraffe,
+the porcupine, and the armadillo, have no vocal chords, and are,
+therefore, mute. This is also the case with the cetacea, the loud
+bellowing of the whale being produced by the expulsion of water
+through the nostrils during the act of expiration. Serpents have no
+vocal chords, and their hiss is the result of breathing forcibly down
+through a soft glottis. Frogs have no trachea, so that their larynx
+opens into the bronchial tube, but the loudness of the croaking
+of male frogs is due to the distension of two membranous sacs at
+the side of the neck. Some frogs have membranous vocal chords,
+others two reed-like bodies, the anterior ends of which are fixed,
+while the posterior ends with the ventricles of the larynx and the
+laryngo-pharyngeal sacs looking into the bronchi are free.
+
+The vocal organs of both man and the other animals present a general
+resemblance to each other, despite varying degrees of development.
+Cats have a sac between the thyroid cartilage and the os hyoideum,
+which have much to do with the modifying and increasing of the
+tones of the voice. The laryngeal sacs are small, and thus prevent
+what might be a shrill cry, such as the deafening shrieks of the
+monkeys of Africa. The epiglottis is comparatively small, and there
+are proportionately small cavities in the thyroid cartilage and the
+os hyoideum, which communicate with the ventricles of the larynx
+and the laryngeal-pharyngeal sacs, which give the peculiar softness
+of musical tone to the feline, as may be noted by a merely casual
+observer, and is accounted one of the most delightful characteristics
+of the Cat.
+
+The brain of the Cat so closely resembles that of man as to force the
+unwilling admission from anatomists and physiologists that in form
+and substance they bear so close and striking a similarity that it
+must be conceded that they are, to all intents and purposes, the same
+in substance and conformation, and differ only in weight and size. It
+will be seen, from this admission of the greatest of physiologists
+and anatomists, possessed as men are of the natural prejudice against
+all animals, saving only man, in the way of his ascendency in every
+respect above all other animals, that, in the proportion of weight of
+brain and under similar circumstances, the intelligence of the Cat is
+equal to that of man. These forced admissions must necessarily carry
+conviction with them, so that I shall hope, at no distant day, to
+hear the admission of what to me is a proven fact, that in the ratio
+of the size of the two brains the Cat is equal in intelligence to man
+under the same existing circumstances.
+
+The negro of America, brought up in ignorance and under servile
+conditions, a slave, classified as cattle, was once considered an
+inferior order of the human species by some, and by many as a
+biped, but a long step beneath his now regarded white brother. Time
+and experience developed the fact that the negro was susceptible
+of cultivation, and his ebony brain, contained in a skull of twice
+and thrice the thickness of the white man's, has been polished to
+a high degree, in exceptional cases, although I must admit that
+this polishing has been found to be in proportion to the degree of
+amalgamation with other races, particularly that of the white man.
+
+Anatomists are unanimous in their opinions and their experiments show
+conclusively that the Cat has a much finer and more delicate organism
+than the dog. Upon this universal deduction I argue that they are
+more sensitive than the dog, a proposition which meets the approval
+of every naturalist, anatomist and pathologist who has ever taken
+the subject into consideration. In fact, it is almost universally
+conceded that Cats are fully as intelligent as dogs, and by many the
+feline is regarded as the superior animal in every respect.
+
+Prof. William Lindsay, M.D., F.R.S., F.L.S., Hon. Member New Zealand
+Institute, says in his remarkable work, entitled "Mind in the Lower
+Animals": "The lower animals are subject to the same kinds of bodily
+diseases as affect men. They are subject to the same kinds of mental
+disorders, productible by the same causes as in man." He asserts that
+Cats readily comprehend and thoroughly understand man's words and
+the conversation of men. The following attributes he ascribes to the
+Cat, namely, "a moral sense in so far as it involves, a, honesty; b,
+sense of duty or trust; c, sense of guilt and shame; d, concealment
+of crime.
+
+"They are self-sacrificing, even to death, understanding man's
+language, verbal and other, including the reading of human character
+and words, the interpretation of facial expressions, use of money
+and knowledge of its power and the principle of barter, buying and
+selling, self-control, appetite, co-operation with man, both in
+useful service and in crime, sensitiveness to insult or affront,
+neglect, injustice, punishment and reproof, discovery of murderers
+and murders, lost or stolen property, idea of time, tune, number,
+order, succession of events. On the whole the place next to man, as
+respects both intellect and morals, is usually assigned to the dog,
+a rank which is, undoubtedly, due to his intimate association with
+and careful training by man for countless generations, for there
+can be no question as to the hereditary transmission and consequent
+accumulation of the truths, good or bad, of education by or in
+imitation of man.
+
+"Man ascribes to the Cat spitefulness, selfishness, cold cruelty,
+stealthiness, treachery and attachment to place and not to person.
+The poor Cat has, probably, been as much maligned and misunderstood
+as it has been petted. We are told that its apparent affection is
+only 'a cupboard love,' and that this is popularly supposed to be
+sufficient to account for its propensity to pilfer eatables and
+drinkables. It is said to be attached to place, not to person, to
+stick to a given house, even when a master or a mistress who has
+heaped kindness upon it has had occasion to change quarters. Absurd
+stories are told as to its sucking children's breath. To speak of
+a scandal-propagating, sour old maid as 'spiteful as a Cat' is so
+common, and we hear the Cat so frequently accused of stealthiness
+or treachery--of the enjoyment of the tortures of its victims and
+of calculating cruelty, and yet Wood tells us, 'instead of being a
+greedy, selfish animal, it is really a very unselfish and generous
+one, capable of great sacrifices.' Jesse mentions one that fed a jay
+twice a day with mice. Another Cat always brought and laid at her
+master's feet the mice she had caught, before she would eat them; she
+made use of them as food only when they were given back to her by her
+master. The attachment of the Cat is frequently as great to person as
+to place, such attachment, however, depending usually on how far she
+is understood, sympathized with and kindly treated.
+
+"Cases have been given of Cats following their masters from house
+to house and place to place, accompanying them on visits to other
+people's residences as unconcerned as a dog. They may be trained to
+guard and defend like a dog."
+
+This author speaks of the affection of the feline for the canine and
+gives many proofs instancing the feeding and nourishing of a sick dog
+by a Cat, and of Cats and dogs living together, in the same kennel,
+of which there have been innumerable instances. Other authors who
+independently verify these assertions by the relations of personal
+observations are Mockridge, Lubbock, Belt, Hogue, Pierre Huber,
+François Huber, Latreille, Nemour, Dr. Franklin, Paisley, Boyer,
+Spaulding, Houzeau, Nichols, Menauly, Leroy, Burnett, Jebb, Fleming,
+Ferrier, Gillies, Gudden, Czermak, Flourens, Smellie, Marville, J. G.
+Wood and many others.
+
+Strong proofs in refutation of the ridiculous assertion that the Cat
+is a lover of place and not of person have been multiplied until
+their name is legion. Strongest of all these proofs are the verified
+narratives of most reliable people and recited in books of authors
+who are above question as to veracity. There is, in fact, no need of
+deceit in this demonstration of the truth in this regard, for where
+the intellect is but ordinary, the evidence of the eye is conclusive
+to those who may have witnessed the action of the maligned animal,
+and the character of the truthful author, whose honesty of purpose
+and freedom from deceit have never been impugned, will be taken for
+all it is worth by all searchers after the truth.
+
+Prof. Wood, the celebrated naturalist, relates a wonderful story of a
+Cat, as follows:
+
+"A Cat recently exhibited a mysterious intuitive power, which equaled
+if not surpassed any story of its kind and narrated. She was the
+property of a newly married couple, who resided toward the north of
+Scotland, where the country narrows considerably, by reason of the
+deeply cut inlets of the surrounding sea. Their cottage was at no
+great distance from the ocean, and there they remained for several
+months. After a while the householders changed their locality and
+took up their residence in a house near the opposite coast. As the
+intervening country was so hilly and rugged that there would have
+been much difficulty in transporting the household goods, the aid of
+a ship was called in, and, after giving their Cat to a neighbor as a
+present, the man and his wife proceeded by sea to their new home.
+
+"After they had been settled for some weeks, they were surprised by
+the sudden appearance of their Cat, which presented itself at their
+door, dirty, ragged and half starved. As might be expected, she was
+joyfully received, and soon recovered her good looks.
+
+"It is hardly possible to conceive whence the animal could have
+obtained her information. Even if the usual means of land transport
+had been taken, it would have been most wonderful that the Cat should
+have been able to trace the line of journey. But when, as in the
+present instance, the human travelers went by water and the feline
+traveler went by land, there seems to be no clue to the guiding power
+which directed the animal in its course and brought it safely to the
+desired goal."
+
+
+
+
+XV.
+
+ILLUSTRATIVE STORIES.
+
+
+Another story, told by Dr. Wood, is proof of the falsity of the
+constantly repeated assertion by many naturalists that the Cat is a
+lover of locality and not of persons, and although it seems almost a
+matter of superfluity to relate it, I will narrate it in order to fix
+the truth beyond contradiction, in the minds of doubters of the real
+fact.
+
+"Many years ago we changed our residence from one part of Oxford to
+another, and, having been told that Cats have no affection except
+for localities, my parents thought that they would not distress
+their Cat by taking her into a house which she would not like, and,
+accordingly, left 'Nutty' at home. But, after we had been settled
+down some eight or ten days, Nutty made her appearance among us and
+displayed by every means in her power her delight at rejoining her
+old friends. She was terribly emaciated, and had evidently endured
+great hardships, but in a few days her rich tortoise-shell fur had
+sleeked itself down and she had recovered her wonted beauty."
+
+I take the following from "Gleanings in Natural History," by Edward
+Jesse, F.L.S., London, 1838. It demonstrates the love of the feline
+for persons and the society of human beings and her innate desire to
+protect both her master and his property, characteristics which have
+heretofore been attributed alone to the dog and denied existence
+in the feline animal. Of the latter trait there are thousands of
+instances which have come under the observation of many people, and
+have been recited in the numerous volumes which I have consulted in
+preparing this paper. The story of this old writer is as follows:
+
+"Cats are generally persecuted animals, and are supposed to show but
+little attachment to those who are kind to them. I have known a Cat,
+however, to evince great uneasiness during the absence of her owner,
+and it is stated that when the Duke of Norfolk was committed to the
+Tower, in the reign of Queen Elizabeth, a favorite Cat made her way
+into his prison room by getting down the chimney.
+
+"Cats have been known, also, to do their best to protect the property
+of their masters as well as dogs. A man who was sentenced to
+transportation for robbery informed me, after his conviction, that
+he and two others broke into the house of a gentleman near Hampton
+Court. While they were in the act of plundering it a large black Cat
+flew at one of the robbers and fixed her claws on each side of his
+face. He added that he never saw any man so much frightened in his
+life.
+
+"Mr. White, in his 'Natural History of Selborne,' states that of all
+quadrupeds Cats are the least disposed toward water, and will not,
+when they can avoid it, deign to wet a foot, much less to plunge
+into that element. The following fact, however, communicated to me
+by a friend who lived several years in Jamaica, will prove that, in
+cases of necessity, they take to water, and is also another instance
+of the attachment of animals to the places where they are bred.
+Being in want of a Cat, one was given him which was not full grown.
+It was put into a canvas bag, and a man on horseback brought him a
+distance of five miles from the place where it was bred. It had never
+been removed before. In doing so, he had to cross two rivers, one
+named the Mino, which is about eighty feet wide and two and a half
+feet deep, and running strong. The other, called Thomas's River, was
+wider and more rapid, but less deep. Over these rivers there were no
+bridges. The Cat, when it arrived, was shut up for some days, and
+when supposed to be reconciled to her new dwelling she was allowed to
+go about the house. The next day, however, she was missing, and was
+found, shortly afterward, at her old abode.
+
+"We had one cunning old black Cat," says a correspondent of Dr. Wood,
+"whose wisdom was acquired by sad experience. In early youth he must
+have been very careless, for at that time he was always getting
+in the way of the men and the wine cases, and frequent were the
+disasters he suffered from coming into collision with moving bodies.
+His ribs had been often fractured, and when nature repaired them he
+must have handed them over to the care of her 'prentice hand, for the
+work was done in a rough and knotty manner.
+
+"This battered and suffering pussy was, at last, assisted by a
+younger hero, who, profiting by the teaching of his senior, managed
+to avoid the scrapes which had tortured the one who was self-educated.
+
+"These two Cats, 'Senior' and 'Junior,' appeared to swear--Cats
+will swear--eternal friendship at first sight. An interchange of
+good offices between them was at once established. 'Senior' taught
+'Junior' to avoid men's feet, and wine-cases in motion, and pointed
+out the favorite hunting ground, while 'Junior' offered to his
+mentor the aid of his activity and physical prowess. 'Senior' had a
+cultivated epicurean taste for mice, which he was too old to catch,
+and he therefore entered into a solemn league and covenant with
+'Junior' to the following effect: It was agreed between these two
+low contracting powers that 'Junior' should devote his energies to
+catching mice for the benefit of 'Senior,' who, in consideration of
+such feudal service, was daily to relinquish his claim to a certain
+allowance of cats' meat, in favor of 'Junior.'
+
+"This curious compact was actually and seriously carried out. It
+was an amusing and touching spectacle to behold young pussy gravely
+laying at the feet of his elder the contents of his gamebag. On
+the other hand, 'Senior,' true to his bargain, licked his jaws and
+watched 'Junior' steadily consuming a double share of cats' meat."
+
+Mr. Bidil writes from the Government Museum of Madras to "Nature,"
+relating this instance of reasoning in a Cat:
+
+"In 1867 I was absent from Madras for two months, and left in my
+quarters three Cats, one of which was an English tabby, a very
+gentle and affectionate creature. During my absence the quarters
+were occupied by two young gentlemen, who delighted in teasing and
+frightening the Cats. About a week before my return the English Cat
+had kittens, which she carefully concealed behind bookshelves in the
+library. On the morning of my return I saw the Cat and petted her,
+as usual, and then left the house for about an hour. On returning
+to dress, I found that the kittens were located in a corner of my
+dressing-room, where previous broods had been deposited and nursed.
+On questioning the servant how they came there, he at once replied,
+'Sir, the old Cat, taking one by one in her mouth, brought them
+here.' In other words, the mother had carried them, one by one, in
+her mouth, from the library to the dressing-room, where they lay
+quite exposed. I do not think I have heard of a more remarkable
+instance of reasoning and affectionate confidence in an animal, and I
+need hardly say that the latter manifestation gave me great pleasure.
+The train of reasoning seems to be as follows: 'Now my master has
+returned, there is no risk of the kittens being injured by the two
+young savages in the house, so I will take them out for my protector
+to see and admire, and keep them in the corner in which all my former
+pets have been nursed in safety.'
+
+"The attachment of the dog and the Cat is sometimes curiously
+manifested," says Prof. Wood, and he continues: "In a large
+metropolitan household there had been a change of servants, and the
+new cook begged, as a favor, to be permitted the company of her dog.
+Permission was granted, and the dog took up his quarters in the
+kitchen, to the infinite disgust of the Cat, who thought her dignity
+insulted by the introduction of a stranger into her special domain.
+In process of time, however, she got over her dislike and the two
+animals became fast friends. At last the cook left and took with her
+the dog.
+
+"After an absence of some length, she determined on paying a visit to
+her former companions, her dog accompanying her as usual. Pussy was
+in the room when the dog entered, and flew forward to greet him. She
+then ran out of the room and shortly returned, bearing in her mouth
+her own dinner. This she laid before her old friend, and actually
+stood behind him as he ate the food with which she so hospitably
+entertained him.
+
+"This anecdote was related to me by the owner of the cat, and there
+can be no reason to doubt it.
+
+"In a chateau in Normandy lived a favorite Cat, which was plentifully
+supplied with food, and had grown fat and sleek on her luxurious
+fare. Indeed, so bounteously was her plate supplied that she was
+unable to consume the entire amount of provisions laid before her.
+This superabundance of food seemed to weigh upon her mind, and one
+day, before her dinner time, she set off across the fields and paid
+a visit to a little cottage near the roadside, where there lived a
+lean Cat. The two animals returned to the chateau in company, and
+after the feline hostess had eaten as much dinner as she desired she
+relinquished the remainder in favor of her friend.
+
+"The kind-hearted proprietor of the chateau, seeing this curious act
+of hospitality, increased the daily allowance of meat and afforded
+an ample meal for both Cats. The improved diet soon exerted its
+beneficial effect on the lean stranger, who speedily became as near
+comfortably sleek as her hostess.
+
+"In this improved state of matters she could not eat as much as when
+she was half starved and ravenous with hunger, and so, after the two
+cats had dined, there was still an overplus. In order to avoid waste,
+and urged by the generosity of her feelings, the hospitable Cat set
+forth on another journey, and fetched another lean Cat from a village
+at a league's distance.
+
+"The owner of the chateau, being desirous to see how the matter would
+end, continued to increase the daily allowance, and had, at last, as
+pensioners of his bounty, nearly twenty Cats, which had been brought
+from various houses in the surrounding country. Yet, however ravenous
+were these daily visitors, none of them touched a morsel until
+their hostess had finished her own dinner. My informant heard this
+narrative from the owner of the chateau.
+
+"In the conduct of this hospitably minded Cat there seems to be none
+of the commercial spirit which actuated the two Mincing Lane Cats,
+but an open-pawed liberality, as beseems an aristocratic birth and
+breeding. The creature had evidently a sense of economy as well as a
+spirit of generosity, and blending the two qualities together, became
+the general almoner of the neighboring felines. There must have been
+also great powers of conversation between these various animals, for
+it is evident that they were able to communicate ideas to each other
+and to induce their companions to act upon the imparted information."
+
+
+
+
+XVI.
+
+SUPERIORITY OF THE CAT OVER OTHER QUADRUMINA.
+
+
+The recent experiments of Prof. Ferrier, according to his own
+interpretation of the phenomena, tend to show that human and animal
+language are identical--that the barking of a dog and the mewing of
+the Cat are equivalents of speech in man, and that the faculty of
+language in man and other animals has virtually the same seat in the
+brain. He describes opening the mouth, putting out the tongue and
+barking, in the dog, mewing, spitting or hissing, in the Cat, as
+signs corresponding to speech. But it needed not the experiments of
+the physiologist or the pathologist, or the scalpel of the anatomist,
+to tell us that the dog's bark, the cat's mew and the horse's neigh,
+as well as the corresponding vocal expressions in other animals,
+are the analogies of speech or speaking in man. Language in animals
+is both natural and acquired. In both cases it may be the result of
+self tuition or man's instruction and training. In both cases its
+variety is to be remarked upon, and, just as in man, this variety,
+which involves expressiveness, or the sign thereof, is frequently, if
+not always, in proportion to the degree of cultivation or education
+of the speaker. The interpretation of animal language, in its varied
+forms, is of the utmost importance in relation to the discrimination
+of notes. It is known, but with accompanying difficulties which arise
+mainly from the following causes or source: first, the significance
+of animal language has been little studied by man; second, the
+wishes or thoughts are expressed in an infinite variety of ways,
+not only in different tribes, genera or species, but, in different
+individuals of the same species and different members of the same
+family and different offspring of the same parent, in different ages
+of the same individual, in the same individual at different times and
+under different circumstances. The mode of expressing the passions is
+different in different animals. Many of the utterances of animals are
+such distinct imitations of the human voice and other sounds as to
+deceive even man himself.
+
+I do not credit the Darwinian theory of evolution with being in the
+line of common sense. In this doubt of its correctness I think I
+am joined by the great majority of mankind. In some human beings
+who think as I do upon this subject, the wish may be father to the
+thought, for a matter of pride, because no man takes kindly to the
+assertion that his progenitors were apes and baboons, or something
+akin to these, and this may be classified as a very commendable
+pride in the human being. Nor do I believe that the domestic Cat
+is an evolution from the wild-cat, or the puma, or the jaguar, or
+anything of their species. The resemblance has deceived more than
+one of the best writers upon the subject, as it certainly tends to
+do. Naturalists are at variance now, as they always have been, upon
+the subject of the true origin of the Cat, for while some declare
+that the domestic Cat evolves from the wild-cat, others claim, with
+as much sincerity, that the wild-cat comes from the domestic feline.
+One author, in proof of such an assertion, remarks that the wild-cat
+is not indigenous to the soil of America, and must, therefore, have
+evolved from a domestic animal, our household pet, as there was no
+other way for the wild animal to get to this country--an argument
+which would scarcely apply to other animals. I cannot see the force
+of such an argument, nor do I bring myself to the belief that the
+beautiful and loving household pet is descended from the ferocious
+and comparatively enormous wild-cat or anything of its species,
+any more than I can believe that the dog is an evolution from the
+lion, the catamount from the tiger, the sprat from the whale, or
+man from the ape. The natural tendency to domesticity in the Cat
+is antagonistic to this theory of evolution, as are many other
+individualities of the feline, and I shall, therefore, claim that our
+Cat is not even a distant relative of the wild animal, but is so far
+removed that the comparison is not only odious but incorrect.
+
+Prof. E.P. Thompson, in his valuable treatise, entitled "Passions of
+Animals," gives to the feline race the following characteristics:
+"Perception, touch, taste, smell, hearing, sight, recollection,
+memory, imagination, dreams, playfulness, homesickness, thought,
+discrimination, attention, experience, sense of injustice,
+computation of time, calculation of number, sensation, tone and
+power of sensation, sympathy, joy, pain, anger, astonishment,
+fear, sympathy of suffering, cruelty, desire, fellowship of joy,
+compassion, appetite, impulse, instinct, self-preservation, tenacity
+of life, temptation, hibernation, form and color, distribution,
+habitation, cleanliness, change of habitation, locality, postures
+and use of natural weapons, care of young, affection for offspring,
+imitation, social impulse, communication, language, curiosity,
+sagacity, temperament, foresight, cunning, artifice, dissimulation,
+attachment, fidelity, gratitude, generosity, vanity, love of praise,
+jealousy, predominancy, hatred, revenge, love, and training."
+
+Concerning the almost universal belief that the dog is a more
+intelligent animal than the Cat, while the classification of animals,
+in the order of intellect, by many authors, gives the first place to
+the dog, the second to the Cat and the third to the horse, I cannot
+agree with them, because the facts are all against such an order of
+classification. I protest against the preferment of the dog to the
+feline for many reasons, not the least of which is the established
+and apparent fact that the construction of the Cat is finer than
+that of the dog. It goes without saying that the dog has been given
+far more and better opportunities for learning and refinement than
+the Cat. The dog is the constant companion of man. He goes with him
+everywhere, to his place of business, to his farm, to his work of
+every nature, upon his walks abroad, to the enjoyment of his sports,
+to the tavern, even to the church, and, when the day's work and
+pleasures are over, to his home, and frequently to his bed-chamber.
+The dog is with the man, his constant companion, from the cradle to
+the grave, and from his constant companionship come the knowledge
+and intelligence of the canine, developed by constant observation of
+man's habits, mode of expression, likes, dislikes, associations and
+moods. It must be admitted by the most obtuse that the Cat has never
+been given such privilege; consequently, to compare the Cat with the
+dog, in the matter of intelligence, is an apparent injustice. Give to
+the feline the same advantages which are bestowed upon the canine,
+and the superiority of the Cat will be immediately appreciable. Prof.
+George J. Romanes, in his valuable work, "Animal Intelligence,"
+recently published, says in relation to the injustice done the
+feline animal by naturalists in general:
+
+"The Cat is, unquestionably, a highly intelligent animal, though,
+when compared with its great domestic rival, the dog, its
+intelligence, from being cast in quite a different mold, is very
+frequently underrated. Comparatively unsocial in temperament,
+wanderingly predaceous in habits and lacking in the affectionate
+docility of the canine nature, this animal has never, in any
+considerable degree, been subject to those psychologically
+transforming influences whereby a prolonged and intimate association
+with man has, as we shall subsequently see, so profoundly modified
+the psychology of the dog. Nevertheless, the Cat is not only by
+nature, an animal remarkable for intelligence, but, in spite of its
+naturally imposed disadvantages of temperament, has not altogether
+escaped those privileges of nurture which unnumbered centuries of
+domestication could scarcely fail to supply. Thus, as contrasted with
+most of the wild species of the genus when tamed from their youngest
+days, the domestic cat is conspicuously less uncertain in its temper
+toward its masters, the uncertainty of temper displayed by nearly all
+the wild members of the feline tribe, when tame, being, of course,
+an expression of the interference of individual with hereditary
+experience."
+
+The delicacy and carefulness of the Cat were never more
+characteristically illustrated or more gracefully described than by
+Prof. Philip G. Hamerton, in his interesting and graphically written
+"Chapter on Animals," in which he takes occasion to say:
+
+"One evening, before dinner time, the present writer had occasion
+to go into a dining room where the cloth was already laid, the
+glasses already upon the sideboard and table, and the lamp and
+candles lighted. A Cat, which was a favorite in the house, finding
+the door ajar, entered softly after me, and began to make a little
+exploration after his manner. I have a fancy for watching animals
+when they think they are not observed, so I affected to be entirely
+absorbed in the occupation which detained me there, and took note
+of the Cat's proceedings without in any way interrupting them. The
+first thing he did was to jump upon a chair and thence up on the
+sideboard. There was a good deal of glass and plate upon that piece
+of furniture, but nothing as yet which, in the Cat's opinion, was
+worth purloining, so he brought all his paws together on the very
+edge of the board, the two forepaws in the middle, the others on
+both sides, and sat, balancing himself for a minute or two whilst he
+contemplated the long, glittering vista of the table. As yet there
+was not an item of anything eatable upon it, but the cat probably
+thought he might as well ascertain whether this were so or not by a
+closer inspection, for, with a single spring, he cleared the abyss,
+and alighted noiselessly on the tablecloth. He walked all over it,
+and left no trace. He passed among the slender glasses, fragile
+stems, like air-bubbles cut in half and balanced on spears of ice,
+yet he disturbed nothing, broke nothing anywhere. When his inspection
+was over he stepped out of sight, having been perfectly inaudible
+from the beginning, so that a blind person could only have suspected
+his visit by that mysterious sense which makes the blind aware of the
+presence of another creature.
+
+"This little scene reveals one remarkable characteristic of the
+feline nature, the innate and exquisite refinement of its behavior.
+It would be infinitely difficult, probably even impossible, to
+communicate a delicacy of this kind to any animal by teaching. Why
+should she tread so carefully? It is not from fear of offending her
+master and incurring punishment, because to do so is in conformity
+with her own idea of behavior, exactly as a lady would feel vexed
+with herself if she broke anything in her own drawing-room, though no
+one would blame her maladresse, and she would never feel the loss.
+A dog on velvet is evidently out of place; he would be as happy
+in clean straw; but a Cat on velvet does not awaken any sense of
+the incongruous. If animals could speak, the dog would be a bluff,
+outspoken, honest fellow, but the Cat would have the rare talent of
+never saying a word too much."
+
+
+
+
+XVII.
+
+INTELLECTUAL POWER OF THE CAT.
+
+
+The immortal Shelley possessed an intense sense of the supernatural,
+and, while being a lover of the feline, appeared to be convinced
+of the fact that Cats have an articulate language formed of easily
+distinguishable words, purely Anglo-Saxon. The following story,
+demonstrative of these facts, may be discounted by some of the more
+incredulous, but it must be remembered that Shelley was renowned for
+his veracity, and is, therefore, entitled to credence. He relates the
+following narrative as he heard it from Mr. G. Lewis:
+
+"A gentleman on a visit to a friend," says he, "who lives on the
+skirts of an extensive forest, on the east of Germany, lost his way.
+He wandered for some hours among the trees, when he saw a light at
+a distance. On approaching it he was surprised to observe that it
+proceeded from the interior of a ruined monastery. Before he knocked,
+he thought it prudent to look through the window. He saw a multitude
+of Cats assembled around a small grave, four of whom were letting
+down a coffin with a crown upon it. The gentleman, startled at this
+unusual sight, and imagining that he had arrived among the retreat of
+fiends or witches, mounted his horse and rode away with the utmost
+precipitation. He arrived at a late hour at his friend's house, who
+had sat up for him. On his arrival his friend questioned him as to
+the cause of the traces of trouble visible in his face. He began to
+recount his adventure after much difficulty, knowing that it was
+scarcely possible that his friend should give faith to his relation.
+No sooner had he mentioned the coffin, with the crown upon it, than
+his friend's Cat, who seemed to have been lying asleep before the
+fire, leaped up, saying, 'Then, I am the King of the Cats!' and,
+scrambling up the chimney, was seen no more."
+
+Prof. Hamerton, in quoting the above, comments upon the story as
+follows:
+
+"Now, is not that a remarkable story, proving at the same time, the
+attention Cats pay to human conversation even when they outwardly
+seem perfectly indifferent to it, and the monarchical character of
+their political organization, which, without this incident, might
+have remained forever unknown to us? This happened, we are told, in
+Eastern Germany, but in our own island, England, less than a hundred
+years ago, there remained many a Cat, it is said, fit to be the
+ministrant of a sorceress."
+
+Concerning the origin of the domestic Cat, Rev. J.G. Wood in his
+"Illustrated Natural History," says: "The Egyptian Cat is the origin
+of the domestic Cat. It is conjectured that the domestic Cat was
+imported from Egypt into Greece and Rome, and from thence to England."
+
+"The Cat," continues Dr. Wood, "is a sadly calumniated creature.
+The Cats with which I have been most familiar have been as docile,
+tractable and good-tempered as any dog could be, and displayed an
+amount of intellectual power which would be equaled by very few dogs
+and surpassed by none. The most conspicuous varieties of the domestic
+Cat are the Manx and Angora. Angora Cats have long, silky hair and
+bushy tails, while the Manx Cat's body is covered with close fur,
+and is tailless."
+
+Dr. Wood, in his most interesting work, relates several stories
+confirmatory of the fact that the Cat is wonderfully endowed with
+intellectuality, and I select the following as being the most
+pleasing:
+
+"Three years ago I had a lovely kitten presented to me. Her fur was
+of beautiful blue-gray, marked with glossy, black stripes, according
+to the most improved zebra or tiger fashion. She was so very pretty
+that she was named 'Pret,' and was, without exception, the wisest,
+most loving and dainty pussy that ever crossed my path. When Pret
+was very young, I fell ill with a nervous fever. She missed me
+immediately in my accustomed place, sought for me, and placed herself
+at my door until she found a chance for getting into the room, which
+she soon accomplished, and began at once to try her little best
+to amuse me with her little frisky, kitten tricks and pussy-cat
+attentions. But soon finding that I was too ill to play with her, she
+placed herself beside me, and at once established herself as head
+nurse. In this capacity few human beings could have exceeded her in
+watchfulness, or manifested more affectionate regard. It was truly
+wonderful to note how soon she learned to know the different hours at
+which I ought to take medicine or nourishment, and, during the night,
+if my attendant was asleep, she would call her, and if she could not
+awake her without such extreme measures, she would gently nibble the
+nose of the sleeper, which never failed to produce the desired effect.
+
+"Having thus achieved her purpose, Miss Pret would watch attentively
+the preparation of whatever was needed, and then come and, with a
+gentle purr announce its advent to me. The most marvelous part of the
+matter was her never being five minutes wrong in her calculation of
+the true time, even amid the stillness and darkness of the night. But
+who shall say by what means this little being was enabled to measure
+the fleeting moments, and by the aid of what power did she connect
+the lapse of time with the needful attentions of a nurse and her
+charge? Surely we have here something more than reason."
+
+The reverend gentleman goes on to say: "The never-failing accuracy
+of this wise little cat was the more surprising since she was
+equally infallible by day or night. There was no striking clock in
+the house, so that she could not have been assisted by its aid,
+nor was it habit, for her assiduous attentions only began with the
+illness and ceased with the recovery of the invalid. Instinct,
+popularly so called, will not account for this wonderful capability
+so suddenly coming into being, and so suddenly ceasing. Surely some
+spirit-guiding power must have animated this simple little creature,
+and have directed her in her labor of love.
+
+"Another time, while Pret was yet in her kittenhood, another kitten
+lived in the same house, and very much annoyed Pret by coming into
+the room and eating the meat which had been laid out for herself.
+However, Pret soon got over that difficulty by going to the plate
+and, as soon as it was placed in the accustomed spot, picking out all
+the large pieces of meat and hiding them under a table. She then sat
+quietly down, and placed herself sentry over the hidden treasure,
+while the intruding Cat entered the room, walked up to the plate and
+finished the little scraps of meat that Pret had thought fit to leave
+her. After the obnoxious individual had left the room, Pret brought
+her concealed treasures from their hiding place and quietly consumed
+them.
+
+"When any one was writing Pret was rather apt to disconcert the
+writer. She always must needs try her skill at anything that her
+mistress did, and no sooner was the pen in motion than Pret would
+jump on the table, and, seizing the end of the pen in her mouth, try
+to direct its movements in her own way. That plan not answering her
+expectations, she would pat the fresh writing paper with her paw, and
+make sad havoc with the correspondence.
+
+"Clever as Pret was, she sometimes displayed an unexpected simplicity
+of character. After the fashion of the cat tribe, she delighted in
+covering up the remnants of her food with any substance that seemed
+most convenient. She was accustomed, after taking her meals, to
+fetch a piece of paper and lay it over the saucer, or to put her paw
+into her mistress' pocket and extract her handkerchief for the same
+purpose. These little performances showed some depth of reasoning in
+the creature, but she would sometimes act in a manner totally opposed
+to rational action. Paper and handkerchiefs failing, she has been
+often seen, after partly finishing her meal, to fetch one of her
+kittens and lay it over the plate, for the purpose of covering up the
+remaining food. When kitten, paper and handkerchief were all wanting,
+she did her best to scratch up the carpet, and to lay the torn
+fragments upon the plate. She had been known, in her anxiety, to find
+covering for the superabundant food, to drag a tablecloth from its
+proper locality, and to cause a sad demolition of the superincumbent
+fragile ware.
+
+"At last Pret died, and one of her offspring became a mother, and
+I conveyed herself and kitten to her former home. Although she
+had not seen the house since her early kittenhood, she recognized
+the locality at once, and, pulling her kitten out of its basket,
+established it in her accustomed bed on the sofa.
+
+"One of her offspring is now domiciled in my own house, and there was
+rather a quaint incident in connection with its departure.
+
+"Minnie knew perfectly well that her kitten was going away from
+her, and, after it had been placed in a little basket, she licked
+it affectionately, and seemed to take a formal farewell of her
+child. When next I visited the house Minnie would have nothing to
+do with me, and when her mistress greeted me, she hid her face in
+her mistress' arms. So I remonstrated with her, telling her that
+her little one would be better off with me than if it had gone
+to a stranger, but all to no purpose. At last I said, 'Minnie, I
+apologize, and will not so offend again.'
+
+"At this remark Minnie lifted up her head, looked me straight in
+the face, and voluntarily came on my knee. Anything more humanly
+appreciative could not be imagined.
+
+"For many days after the abstraction of her offspring, Minnie would
+not approach the various spots sanctified by the presence of her
+lost child, and would not even repose on a certain shawl, knitted
+from scarlet wool, which was her favorite resting-place. She is a
+compassionate pussy, like her late mother, and mightily distressed
+at any illness that falls on any of the household. When her mistress
+has been suffering from a severe cough, I have seen Minnie jump up on
+the sofa and put her paw sympathetically on the lips of the sufferer.
+Sneezing seems to excite her compassion even more than coughing, and
+causes her to display even a greater amount of sympathy."
+
+
+
+
+XVIII.
+
+SOME CHARACTERISTICS OF THE CAT.
+
+
+One strong characteristic attributed to the Cat by its enemies and
+traducers is quarrelsomeness. I will not take the trouble to deny the
+assertion, but leave the reader to deny it out of his own experience,
+and will give two versions of the old story of the Kilkenny Cats,
+so frequently quoted in demonstration of the fighting qualities of
+Pussy, who is, evidently, only too eager to live in peace with all
+the world, in conformity with her great desire for comfort.
+
+The story generally told is that two felines fought in a saw-pit with
+such ferocious determination that, when the battle was over, nothing
+could be found remaining of either combatant except the tail, the
+marvelous inference to be drawn therefrom being, of course, that they
+had devoured each other.
+
+The ludicrous anecdote has, no doubt, been generally looked upon
+as an absurdity of the Joe Miller class--but this, according to a
+writer in the English "Notes and Queries," is all a mistake. He
+continues, concerning the historical matter of the Kilkenny Cats, "I
+have not the least doubt that the story of the mutual destruction
+of the contending cats was an allegory designed to typify the
+utter ruin to which centuries of litigation and embroilment on the
+subject of conflicting rights and privileges tended to reduce the
+respective exchequers of the rival municipal bodies of Kilkenny and
+Irishtown--separate corporations, existing within the limits of
+one city, and the boundaries of whose respective jurisdictions had
+never been marked out or defined by any authority to which either was
+willing to bow. Their struggle for precedence and for the maintenance
+of alleged rights invaded commenced A.D. 1377, and were carried on
+with truly feline fierceness and implacability until the end of the
+seventeenth century, when it may be fairly considered that they had
+mutually devoured each other, to the very tail, as we find their
+property all mortgaged, and see them each passing by-laws that their
+respective officers should be content with the dignity of their
+stations and forego all salary until the suit at law with the other
+pretended corporation should be terminated, and the incumbrances
+thereby caused removed with the vanquishment of the enemy."
+
+Those who have taken the story of the Kilkenny Cats in its literal
+sense have done grievous injustice to the character of the grimalkins
+of the "fair critic," who are really quite as demure and quietly
+disposed a race of tabbies as it is in the nature of any animal to
+be. The other story, which, to my mind seems mere probable than the
+one just recited, is given by my friend, Mr. S. Clark Gould, in his
+"Notes and Queries," as follows:
+
+"During the rebellion which occurred in Ireland, in 1798, or, it may
+be, in 1803, Kilkenny was garrisoned by a troop of Hessian soldiers,
+who amused themselves in barracks by tying two cats together by their
+tails and throwing them across a clothes-line to fight. One of the
+officers, hearing of this cruel practice, resolved to stop it. As he
+entered the room, one of the troopers seized a sword, cut the tails
+in two as the animals hung across the line, and thus suffered the two
+cats to escape, minus their tails, through the open window, and when
+the officer inquired the meaning of the two bleeding tails being left
+in the room, he was coolly told that two cats had been fighting, and
+had devoured each other, all but the tails."
+
+Before Noah Webster asserted that "the lower animals" only possessed
+instinct, which he defined as a power "or disposition of mind,
+by which, independent of all instruction or experience, without
+deliberation, and without having any end in view, animals are
+unerringly directed to do spontaneously whatever is necessary for the
+preservation of the individual or the continuation of the kind," he
+should have read the following authenticated stories, illustrative of
+the forethought of the Cat. The first of these I take from an English
+magazine, called "Nature," and it is communicated by Dr. J.R. Frost.
+
+"Our servants have been accustomed, during the late frost, to throw
+crumbs from the breakfast table to the birds, and I have, several
+times, noticed that our cat used to wait there in ambush, in the
+expectation of a hearty meal from one or two of the assembled
+birds. Now, so far, this circumstance is not an example of abstract
+reasoning, but to continue. For the last few days this practice of
+feeding the birds has been left off. The cat, however, with an almost
+incredible amount of forethought, was observed by myself, together
+with two other members of my household, to scatter crumbs on the
+grass with the obvious intention of enticing the birds."
+
+Another correspondent writes to the same magazine as follows:
+
+"A case somewhat similar to that mentioned by Dr. Frost, of a Cat
+scattering crumbs, occurred within my own knowledge in a neighbor's
+yard. During the recent severe winter a friend was in the habit
+of throwing crumbs outside his bedroom window. The family have a
+fine, black Cat, which, seeing that the crumbs brought birds, would
+occasionally hide himself behind some shrubs, and when the birds
+came to their breakfast would pounce upon them with varying success.
+The crumbs had been thrown out as usual one afternoon, but left
+untouched, and during the night a slight fall of snow occurred. On
+looking out next morning, my friend observed puss busily engaged
+in scratching away the snow. Curious to learn what she sought, he
+waited, and saw her take the crumbs up from the cleared space and lay
+them, one by one, on the snow. After doing this she retired behind
+the shrubs to await further developments. This was repeated on two
+occasions."
+
+In further proof of the fact that Pussy possesses a wonderful power
+of forethought, Prof. Romanes tells this story as coming from a
+correspondent:
+
+"While a paraffine lamp was being filled, some of the oil fell upon
+the back of our Cat, and was afterward ignited by a cinder falling
+upon it from the fire. The Cat, with her back in a blaze, in an
+instant made for the door, which happened to be open, and sped up
+the street about a hundred yards, where she plunged into the village
+watering-trough, and extinguished the blaze. The trough had eight or
+nine inches of water, and Puss was in the habit of seeing the fire
+put out with water every night. The latter point is important, as it
+shows the data of observation on which the animal reasoned."
+
+Another correspondent, after describing a Cat and parrot in their
+amiable relationship, proceeds to the following narration:
+
+"One evening there was no one in the kitchen. Cook had gone upstairs
+and left a bowl of dough to raise by the fire. Shortly after the Cat
+rushed up after her, mewing and making what signs she could for her
+to go downstairs, when she jumped up and seized her apron and tried
+to drag her down. As she was in such a state of excitement, cook
+went and found Polly shrieking, calling out, flapping her wings and
+struggling violently, up to her knees in dough and stuck quite fast.
+
+"No doubt if she had not been rescued she would have sunk in the
+morass and been smothered."
+
+Mr. Belshaw, writing to "Nature," says: "I was sitting in one of the
+rooms of a friend's house the first evening there, and on hearing
+a loud knock at the front door, was told not to heed it, as it was
+only the kitten asking for admission. Not believing it, I watched for
+myself, and very soon saw the kitten jump onto the door, hang on by
+one leg, and with the other forepaw right through the knocker, rap
+twice."
+
+As being of general interest, I take the following explanation of
+the common theory that the Cat has nine lives, from "Zoological
+Recreations," by William J. Broderip, F.R.S.:
+
+"The expostulating tabby in 'Gay's Fables' says to the old beldame:
+
+     "'Tis infamy to serve a hag,
+     Cats are thought imps, her broom a nag;
+     And boys against our lives combine,
+     Because, 'tis said, your cats have nine.
+
+"The Cat probably owes this reputation to a nine-fold vitality, not
+only to its extraordinary endurance of violence and its recovery from
+injury, which frequently leaves it for dead, but also to the belief
+that a witch was empowered to take on her a Cat's body nine times."
+
+In demonstrating the finer sensibilities of the feline race, Prof.
+Wood says:
+
+"Some Cats appear to have a strong sense of honor, and will resist
+almost every temptation when they are placed in a position of trust.
+Still, some temptations appear so powerful that the honorable
+feelings cannot resist them. For example, one Cat would resist every
+lure, except a piece of fried sole, another could never withstand the
+allurements of a little jug of milk or bottled stout. She would have
+boldly averted her head from the same liquids if they were placed in
+a basin or saucer, but the little jug, in which she could just dip
+her paw, and lick it possessed irresistible fascination for her. And
+as other examples, I have known several cats who possessed a strong
+taste for fermented liquors, and I have seen one of these creatures
+eat a piece of bread, soaked in pure brandy, and beg earnestly for a
+further supply."
+
+
+
+
+XIX.
+
+GENEROSITY, CUNNING AND CAMARADERIE.
+
+
+Possibly there is no better way for an author to illustrate his
+subject or punctuate an argument than by quoting the most interesting
+and conclusive stories which are directly to the point. I have done
+so and will continue to do so in this chapter, hoping that the
+stories narrated will not only be of interest, but impressive and
+conclusive.
+
+From "Petland," by Rev. J.C. Wood, I take the following story, which
+is illustrative of the generosity and self-sacrifice of the feline
+animal. It is a relation about "Pret," the grandson of the original
+of that name, of whom the reverend gentleman had something to say in
+a previous chapter:
+
+"He was fond of entertaining his friends in the yard, and was in
+the habit of bringing dinner to the club for the benefit of his
+acquaintances, and then wanting a second dinner on his own account,
+in the evening. He even went so far as to be disgusted with the meals
+furnished to a neighboring cat, thinking that cat's-meat was not fit
+for feline consumption. Acting upon this supposition, he was seen to
+take away the cat's-meat as soon as it was brought by the itinerant
+purveyor, to carry it into the cellar, bury it under a heap of coals,
+and to take his own dinner upstairs for his friends."
+
+The imitative power of Pussy has never been illustrated with more
+force than in the story which I take from the work by Prof. George
+J. Romanes, and which occurred, as he states, under his personal
+observation.
+
+"For myself, I may say that my own coachman once had a Cat which,
+certainly without tuition, learned to open a door that led into
+the stables from a yard, into which looked some of the windows of
+my house. Standing at these windows when the Cat did not see me,
+I have many times witnessed her modus operandi. Walking up to the
+door, with a most matter-of-course kind of air, she used to spring
+at the half-hoop handle, just below the thumb-latch. Holding on to
+the bottom of this half-hoop with one forepaw, she then raised the
+other to the thumb-piece, and while depressing the latter, finally,
+with her hind legs, scratched and pushed the doorpost so as to
+open the door. Precisely similar cases have been described by my
+correspondents as having been witnessed by them."
+
+It may be interesting to the reader to know that Prof. Darwin, in his
+great treatise upon animals, declares that Cats with blue eyes are
+invariably deaf. My experience has not proven this assertion, and, if
+it is as true as other assertions, in "The Origin of Species," for
+instance, the evolution of man from the ape, I think the reader has
+just cause for doubt.
+
+Sir Richard Phillips says in "Million of Facts," American edition,
+page 48: "The Angora Cat has one eye blue and the other yellow."
+Also, on page 49: "Perfectly white Cats are deaf."
+
+Regarding this last assertion, I will say I once owned a "perfectly
+white Cat," which was a Tom, weighing twenty-five pounds, who was not
+deaf, and I cannot comprehend any just reason why a white Cat should
+be deaf, or what the color of the fur has to do with the ear or her
+hearing.
+
+The statement has been made in the works of several writers upon
+animals and their habits that dogs and Cats would never fraternize. I
+have not a doubt that the experience of most of my readers will serve
+to demonstrate the contrary, as my own experience undoubtedly does.
+
+Illustrative of the superior intelligence of the Cat, Prof. Romanes
+gives the following stories:
+
+"Mrs. Hubbard tells me of a Cat she possessed that was in the habit
+of poaching young rabbits, to 'eat privately in the seclusion of a
+disused pig-sty.' One day this Cat caught a small black rabbit, and,
+instead of eating it, as she always did the brown ones, brought it
+into the house, unhurt, and laid it at the feet of her mistress.
+'She clearly recognized the black rabbit as an unusual specimen and
+apparently thought it right to show it to her mistress.' Such was not
+the only instance this Cat showed of zoological discrimination, for
+on another occasion, having caught another unusual animal, viz., a
+stoat, she also brought this, alive, into the house, for the purpose
+of exhibiting it."
+
+Mr. T.B. Groves tells, in "Nature," of a Cat which, on first seeing
+his own reflection in the mirror, tried to fight it. Meeting with
+resistance from the glass, the Cat next ran behind the mirror. Not
+finding the object of his search, he again came to the front, and
+while keeping his eyes deliberately fixed upon the image, felt round
+the edge of the glass with one paw, whilst with his head twisted
+around to the front he assured himself of the persistence of the
+reflection. He never afterwards condescended to notice the mirror.
+
+A wonderful faculty of the Cat is her quick perception of the uses
+of mechanical appliances. In corroboration of this assertion, I
+introduce the following stories:
+
+Couch, in his "Illustrations of Instinct," page 196, gives a case
+within his own knowledge, of a Cat which, in order to get some milk
+which was kept in a locked cupboard, used to unlock the door by
+seating herself on an adjoining table and "repeatedly patting on the
+bow of the key with her paw, when, with a slight push on the door,
+she was able to open it. The lock was old and the key turned in it on
+a very slight impulse."
+
+As a still further instance of the Cat's high appreciation of
+mechanical appliances, I give an extract from a paper by Mr. Otto,
+which will have been read at the Linnean Society, before this paper
+is published.
+
+"At Peara, the residence of Parker Bowan, Esq., a full-grown Cat was
+one day accidentally locked up in a room, without any other outlet
+than a small window moved on hinges, and kept shut up by means of a
+swivel. Not long afterwards the window was found open and the Cat
+gone. This having happened several times, it was, at last, found that
+the Cat jumped upon the window sill, placed her forepaws as high
+as she could reach against the side, deliberately reached with one
+over to the swivel, moved it from its horizontal to a perpendicular
+position, and then, leaning with her whole weight against the window,
+escaped."
+
+Illustrative of the camaraderie of the Cat with human beings, and
+of the fact that she can, and frequently does, overcome her natural
+antipathy to water, Prof. Romanes tells the following interesting
+tale:
+
+"A fisherman, of Portsmouth, England, called 'Robinson Crusoe,' made
+famous by Mr. Buckland, had a cat called 'Puddles,' which overcame
+the horror of water, characteristic of his race, and employed his
+piscatorial talent in the service of his master, who said of him:
+'He was the wonderfulest water Cat as ever came out of Portsmouth
+Harbor, was Puddles, and he used to go out a-fishin' with me every
+night. On cold nights he would sit on my lap while I was a-fishin',
+and poke his head out every now and then, or else I would wrap him up
+in a sail, and make him lay quiet. He'd lay down on me while I was
+asleep, and if anybody come, he'd swear a good un, and have the face
+off on 'em if they went to touch me, and he'd never touch a fish, not
+even a little teeny pout, if you didn't give it to 'im. I was obliged
+to take him out a-fishin' or else he'd stand an' yowl and marr till
+I went back and ketched him by the poll and shied him into the boat,
+and then he was quite happy. When it was fine he used to stick up at
+the bow of the boat and sit a-watchin' the dogs," meaning dog-fish.
+"The dogs used to come along by the thousands at a time, and when
+they was thick all about, he would dive in and fetch 'em out, jammed
+in his mouth as fast as may be, just as if they was a parcel of rats,
+and he didn't tremble with the cold half as much as a Newfoundland
+dog who was used to it. He looked terrible wild about the head when
+he came out of the water with a dog-fish. I larnt him the water
+myself. One day, when he was a kitten, I took him down to the sea
+to wash and brush the fleas out of him, and in a week he could swim
+after a feather or a cork."
+
+
+
+
+XX.
+
+VOWELS AND LIQUIDS PREDOMINATE.
+
+
+In the foregoing chapters, I have quoted largely from the best
+anatomists, physiologists, naturalists, pathologists, philologists
+and linguists, in support of my theses, the most important of which
+are:
+
+First--That the Cat is of a more delicate organism than the dog and,
+therefore, more susceptible of refinement and everything that goes
+toward making it a superior animal.
+
+Second--That it possesses a higher order of intelligence than any
+other of the quadrumina, and, consequently, more brain-power equal to
+that of man, in the ratio of its size.
+
+Third--That with the same advantages or association with man and
+equal advantages of time and opportunity, the Cat will prove herself
+possessed of all the attributes which have been so much admired in
+the dog, besides the many admirable personalities accorded to her,
+and disprove the faults which have been ascribed to the feline by a
+prejudiced people.
+
+If the reader will admit my arguments to be good enough to prove my
+theses, it will go a long way toward the admission of my theories
+concerning the language of the Cat, which my investigations have
+proven to me to be not only a possibility, but a fact beyond dispute.
+I have been thus particular in the foregoing chapters, in order to
+lay a foundation for what follows concerning the interpretation of
+a sign and word language, given to the Cat as language was given
+to man by his Maker. The possibility of the cultivation of such a
+language is an important point in my argument, and I give, in support
+thereof, no less, as there cannot be any greater, authority in the
+English language than Prof. A.H. Sayce, the eminent philologist,
+who, in his "Introduction to the Science of Language," remarks: "We
+must be careful to remember that language includes every kind of
+instrumentality whereby we communicate our thoughts and feelings to
+others, and that the deaf mute who can communicate only with the
+fingers and lips is as truly gifted with the power of speech as the
+man who can articulate his words. The latter has a more perfect
+instrument at his command, but that is all. Indeed, it is quite
+possible to conceive of a community in which all communications were
+carried on by means of the hands alone. To this day the savage tribes
+make large use of gestures, and we are told that the Grevos, of
+Africa, admirably imitate the persons and tenses of the verbs by this
+means only."
+
+In the word part of the language of the Cat there are, probably,
+not more than six hundred fundamental words, all others being
+derivatives. Consonants are daintily used, while a wide berth is
+given to explosives and the liquid letters "l" and "r" enter into
+the great majority of sounds. The sounds of the labials are not
+frequently heard, but the vowels, a, e, i, o and u, go far toward
+making up the entire complement of words in the language of the Cat.
+
+I say that there are not, probably, more than six hundred primitive
+words, because I have not, after years of search, discovered more
+than that number, and am of the opinion that the spoken words will
+not number more. The difficulty of fixing the number of spoken words
+may be realized from the fact that the signs are so universally used,
+to the neglect of the sounds, that the opportunity afforded to catch
+the sound and interpret the meaning is rare. In short, while the
+words do exist, they are never used excepting when actual necessity
+requires their use. Signs are not only more comprehensive than
+sounds, but the meaning is conveyed more quickly and with greater
+ease emphasized. Sounds are used chiefly to attract attention where
+signs would fail. Therefore, signs are used to the exclusion of
+sounds, whenever they will answer the purpose.
+
+The Chinese language is more nearly like the Cat language than any
+of the existing languages, and so closely resembles it in very
+many respects as to almost persuade me that the language of the
+Cat was derived from it. It is a wonderful thing, and well worth
+our attention, that no people are more fond of the feline than the
+Chinese, who utilize the little animal to a greater extent than
+people in any other part of the world. It is not a fact generally
+known, but it is a fact that reveals itself to all foreigners who
+visit the Celestial Empire, all of whom assure us of its truth,
+that the Chinese use the Cat to tell the time of day. This they
+are enabled to do by a close observation of the contraction and
+elongation of the pupil of the eye. It is said to be an unerring sign
+and always answers the purpose of correctly indicating the hour and
+part of an hour where a clock is not at hand, or may be too costly
+an article of household furnishing for the poorer classes among the
+moon-eyed creatures of the Orient.
+
+In the Chinese language there are few words, and, like the Chinese,
+the sounds uttered in the Cat language are musical tones, mellifluous
+and pleasing to the senses. Like the Chinese, too, the words have
+various meanings, according to the inflections of the voice. The
+resemblance in the use and disuse of certain letters, is significant,
+and never more so than in the constant infusion of the vowels. Take,
+for instance, the word "mieouw," so frequently heard, uttered by the
+feline, and meaning, literally, "here," and we find in it a word of
+five letters, three absolute and one "possible" vowels.
+
+Give attention, for a moment, to the word "purrieu," which is a
+note of satisfaction and content, and give attention to the number
+of vowels and the Frenchman's roll of the liquid "r," so that it
+comes to the ear like "pur-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-rieu," with a gradually
+ascending inflection. In plain English, it means "happy," or, more
+comprehensively, perhaps, "all is quiet along the Potomac," and
+"I am as happy as a clam at high water," expressions whose weight
+and importance were better understood by the soldiers of the army
+of the Potomac, after the Battle of Bull Run, and by lovers of the
+crustacean, than by ordinary people.
+
+A matronly Cat will always use the last-mentioned word in calling
+together her family under ordinary circumstances, and continue it
+while caressing them, frequently merging it into a song much lower
+and sweeter to the sense than the lullaby we all have heard from the
+lips of the gentle mother while nestled tenderly upon her heart.
+The meaning of this word is never so well understood by kittens as
+when uttered in a sharp tone and repeated a number of times more as
+an explosive than otherwise, for it is a warning of danger and a
+call for instant action from the mother-Cat, who is imperious in her
+demands for obedience, which is the first law in her family life.
+
+The sounds of the labials, b, f, m, p, v, w and y, are more
+frequently heard in words of anger than otherwise, as, for instance,
+in the significant war-cry and notes of defiance, out on the
+woodshed, in the hours of the night when fair Luna is enthroned in
+the peaceful sky, in contradistinction to the battle-field in the
+back yard. This may be written "mie-ouw, vow, wow teiow yow tiow, wow
+yow, ts-s-s-s-syow!" ending in an explosion. The signification is
+both a defiance and a curse, and comes so near to bold, bad swearing
+that I hesitate to put in words the English of it. The word "yow,"
+means extermination from the face of the earth, and when the common
+word "mieouw" is used with strong emphasis upon the first syllable,
+it means "beware!" for the fur is about to fly.
+
+
+
+
+XXI.
+
+CAT WORDS IN COMMON USE.
+
+
+The disposition of the Cat to mouth her words has given the
+impression to many who have studied her utterances to conclude that
+most, if not all of her words begin with the sound of the letter
+"m," and this is an error which cost me months of wasted time while
+seeking to evolve the Cat language. It is natural for a Cat, as well
+as a necessary precaution in every animal, including man, to keep
+the mouth closed and breathe only through the nostrils, excepting
+while in the act of eating, drinking or speaking. It will be noticed
+that when the mouth is open the sound that comes most naturally and
+readily is that of the letter "m." The deception originated in this
+fact. I will admit a tendency of the feline to anticipate the word
+with this sound, but to suppose that every word of the Cat language
+commences with that sound is erroneous. The plaintive cry for food,
+"aelio," was, for a long time, set down by me with the letter "m"
+preceding it, and it was not until I had appreciated the uselessness
+of that letter preceding the word "lae," meaning "milk," that I
+disregarded the letter "m," and arrived at the true spelling of these
+and many other words which were uttered singly or at the beginning
+of a sentence. The word "alieeo," meaning "water," is subject to the
+same misspelling, there being no "m" at the beginning of it, but the
+word uttered at the door, when the Cat wants it opened, "parrierre,"
+meaning "open," is never preceded with the labial, as it could not be
+pronounced in company with the letter "p."
+
+The utterance of the word "bl" may have been noticed by an observer
+when the mother-Cat has brought a mouse to her kitten. I have given
+as close a resemblance to the sound as possible, in the English
+language, and it signifies "meat," and not "mouse," as one might be
+led to suppose, "ptleo-bl," meaning "mouse-meat," and "bleeme-bl,"
+cooked meat.
+
+The word "pad" means "foot," and "leo" signifies "head." "Pro" is the
+feline for "nail or claw," and "tut" for "limb," while the body is
+called "papoo" and the fur "oolie."
+
+The most surprising characteristic of the Cat is, undoubtedly, her
+wonderful appreciation of the passage of time and the invariable
+correctness with which the feline notes the hour and even the
+minutes after the hour, without the aid of, or even appearing to
+comprehend the value of a clock in computing time. This wonderful
+gift was one of the first of my discoveries, as it was one of the
+most interesting rewards for my labors. Appreciating that the Cat
+must have recourse to sounds for the expression of the hours in
+their conversation, I applied myself to the study of them, and was
+astonished at the rapidity with which I acquired the Cat-words
+standing for numbers. In this labor I was materially aided by my
+knowledge of the tendency of the feline to gesticulate, and when a
+number was spoken I noticed, regarding the lowest of them, that the
+Cat would significantly pat her foot, say once for one; twice for
+two and so on, even to seven times occasionally. The highest numbers
+were not difficult of attainment by the Cat language, because of
+the lack of gesticulations comprehensive of the quantity. By other
+signs I arrived at a correct conclusion and became as perfect in the
+words and their meanings as the Cat herself. I was greatly rejoiced
+at this easy victory, and regarded it as a good omen of success in
+my more difficult undertaking of acquiring the full language, not
+anticipating the years of toil, whose arduousness, however, was
+lightened, at long intervals, by success. The numbers, correct beyond
+doubt, are as follows:
+
+  1.--Aim.
+
+  2.--Ki.
+
+  3.--Zah.
+
+  4.--Su.
+
+  5.--Im.
+
+  6.--Lah.
+
+  7.--El.
+
+  8.--Ic.
+
+  9.--No.
+
+  10.--End.
+
+  11.--Est.
+
+  12.--Ro.
+
+  13.--Zah-do.
+
+  14.--Sudoo.
+
+  15.--Im-doo.
+
+  16.--Lah-doo.
+
+  17.--El-doo.
+
+  18.--Ic-doo.
+
+  19.--No-doo.
+
+  20.--Ki-le.
+
+  21.--Kile-aim.
+
+  22.--Kile-ki.
+
+  23.--Kile-zah.
+
+  24.--Kile-su.
+
+  25.--Kile-im.
+
+  26.--Kile-lah.
+
+  27.--Kile-el.
+
+  28.--Kile-ic.
+
+  29.--Kile-no.
+
+  30.--Zah-le.
+
+  31.--Zahle-aim.
+
+  32.--Zahle-ki.
+
+  33.--Zahle-zah.
+
+  34.--Zahle-su.
+
+  35.--Zahle-im.
+
+  36.--Zahle-lah.
+
+  37.--Zahle-el.
+
+  38.--Zahle-ic.
+
+  39.--Zahle-no.
+
+  40.--Su-le.
+
+  41.--Sule-aim.
+
+  42.--Sule-ki.
+
+  43.--Sule-zah.
+
+  44.--Sule-su.
+
+  45.--Sule-im.
+
+  46.--Sule-lah.
+
+  47.--Sule-el.
+
+  48.--Sule-ic.
+
+  49.--Sule-no.
+
+  50.--Im-le.
+
+  51.--Imle-aim.
+
+  52.--Imle-ki.
+
+  53.--Imle-zah.
+
+  54.--Imle-su.
+
+  55.--Imle-im.
+
+  56.--Imle-lah.
+
+  57.--Imle-el.
+
+  58.--Imle-ic.
+
+  59.--Imle-no.
+
+  60.--Lah-le.
+
+  61.--Lahle-aim.
+
+  62.--Lahle-ki.
+
+  63.--Lahle-zah.
+
+  64.--Lahle-su.
+
+  65.--Lahle-im.
+
+  66.--Lahle-la.
+
+  67.--Lahle-el.
+
+  68.--Lahle-ic.
+
+  69.--Lahle-no.
+
+  70.--El-le.
+
+  71.--Elle-aim.
+
+  72.--Elle-ki.
+
+  73.--Elle-zah.
+
+  74.--Elle-su.
+
+  75.--Elle-im.
+
+  76.--Elle-lah.
+
+  77.--Elle-el.
+
+  78.--Elle-ic.
+
+  79.--Elle-no.
+
+  80.--Ic-le.
+
+  81.--Icle-aim.
+
+  82.--Icle-ki.
+
+  83.--Icle-zah.
+
+  84.--Icle-su.
+
+  85.--Icle-im.
+
+  86.--Icle-lah.
+
+  87.--Icle-el.
+
+  88.--Icle-ic.
+
+  89.--Icle-no.
+
+  90.--No-le.
+
+  91.--Nole-aim.
+
+  92.--Nole-ki.
+
+  93.--Nole-zah.
+
+  94.--Nole-su.
+
+  95.--Nole-im.
+
+  96.--Nole-lah.
+
+  97.--Nole-el.
+
+  98.--Nole-ic.
+
+  99.--Nole-no.
+
+  100.--Aim-hoo.
+
+The word "hoo" means "hundred." The word "milli" stands for
+"thousands" in the English language. The word "zule" means
+"millions," and a millionaire in the Cat language is a "zuluaim."
+
+Concerning the sense of the arrangement of sounds for the numbers I
+have nothing to say, for I cannot account for their selection, but
+the musical sweetness of the sounds in conjunction is wonderfully
+striking. Mark the euphony of the language in the expression of
+numbers conjunctively, for instance, in expressing the amount
+ninety-nine millions, seven hundred and forty-three thousands,
+two hundred and thirty-four--"nole-no zulus, el hoo sule-zah
+millis, ki hoo zahle-su." Again, let the ear catch the music as I
+give you, in the Cat language, the expression of one hundred and
+fifty-seven millions, six hundred and fifty-four thousands, eight
+hundred and thirty-nine--"aim hoo imle-el zulus, lah hoo imle-su
+millis, ic hoo zahle-no." Once more, let me express the euphony
+in the interpretation into the Cat language of eight hundred and
+eighty-eight millions, four hundred and ninety-one thousands, seven
+hundred and sixty-five--"ic hoo icle-ic zulus, su hoo nole-aim
+millis, el hoo lahle-im." Now take the table and you may find much
+pleasure in making up your own combinations of figures, none of which
+will be other than musical.
+
+The expression of the time of day by the man on the tramway, is the
+expression of the time of day in the Cat language by the feline as,
+for instance, in telling that the time was eight-eighteen, the Cat
+would say "ic ic-doo;" twelve forty-five would be "ro sule-im;" nine
+thirty-seven, "no zahle-el;" three thirty-three, "zah zahle-zah;"
+eight thirty-eight, "ic zahle-ic;" two twenty-two, "ki kile-ki;"
+four thirty-nine, "su zahle-no;" five fifty-five, "im imle-im;" six
+twenty-three, "lah kile-zah," and so forth.
+
+
+
+
+XXII.
+
+A COMPREHENSIVE LIST OF WORDS.
+
+
+It is not my intention in this mere paper to give a lexicon of the
+feline language. So short a treatise could not comprise so elaborate
+a work. Even were the space adequate, I have not, as yet, accumulated
+the information, because the time devoted to the subject has not
+been adequate to the labor of investigation, which is, necessarily,
+intricate and far-reaching. Neither do I propose to mystify the
+reader by giving that most misleading of all inventions of the
+linguist, a grammar of the feline language, any more than I intend
+to inflict a dictionary upon the world. If I succeed in presenting
+to the reader a comprehensive, or in any appreciable or satisfactory
+degree comprehensive conception of the Cat language, demonstrating
+what I know of my own knowledge, after years of investigation, that
+the Cat has a distinct, simple and fully adequate language, universal
+for all particular purposes, and intelligible to all felines, as
+well as to all humanity who will seek to acquire it, I will have
+accomplished my object for the present. In this paper my desire
+is to lay the foundation for a larger structure in the future. My
+greatest desire is to interest the world in this worthy subject and
+induce investigations by others. I have no wish to be selfishly
+exclusive. I do not seek any honor or remuneration for my labors and
+discoveries. My reward will come with the reward to the feline, which
+must necessarily follow that elevation of the Cat succeeding the
+recognition of the fact claimed by me.
+
+I have not yet discovered that any naturalist, linguist, philologist
+or scientist has, thus far, either presented or advocated the theory
+of the feline language comprehensive enough to be understood by man,
+but I bear in mind what your great Shakespeare wrote, "There are more
+things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreampt of in your
+philosophy," and allow, without dispute, that all I have written may
+have been thought out and even printed by some other writer than
+myself, but it is, at least, new to me, and I think the reader will
+admit that it is new to him as an entirety. Of course every reader
+has heard the peculiar cries and expressions of the Cat, and will
+remember some word or words, and will have no difficulty in following
+up his or her investigations.
+
+Remembering that mere words form but a very small part of the feline
+language, I desire to lay particular stress upon the signs which,
+in the Cat language, are paramount and always intelligible to man,
+no matter what tongue he may choose to speak or from what part of
+the world he may come. One of the beauties, as well as one of the
+advantages of the muscular signs of an expression is that it needs
+no grammar, no dictionary, no elaborate treatise upon rhetoric,
+etymology, syntax, prosody or other advantages of belles-lettres,
+to refine and perfect it. Because of this happy fact, the
+uneducated man, as we are apt to call those who are ignorant of our
+acquirements, may express his thoughts as fluently, as correctly and
+as gracefully as his superiors in knowledge, wealth and refinement.
+By the sign-language a whole sentence may be expressed better in a
+fraction of a second than by the word language in a much greater
+space of time. Therefore, its importance is of inestimable value.
+
+I have already given seventeen of the most important words of the
+feline language, with their English equivalents, as follows:
+
+  Aelio          Food.
+  Lae            Milk.
+  Parriere       Open.
+  Aliloo         Water.
+  Bl             Meat.
+  Ptlee-bl       Mouse meat.
+  Bleeme-bl      Cooked meat.
+  Pad            Foot.
+  Leo            Head.
+  Pro            Nail or claw.
+  Tut            Limb.
+  Papoo          Body.
+  Oolie          Fur.
+  Mi-ouw         Beware.
+  Purrieu        Satisfaction or content.
+  Yow            Extermination.
+  Mieouw         Here.
+
+
+
+
+XXIII.
+
+A MUSICAL LANGUAGE.
+
+
+To correctly interpret the words of a sentence, the important fact
+must be borne in mind that the order of speech is not the same in
+the feline tongue as in almost any other language. I claim to be
+master of forty-nine different and distinct languages, and none but
+the Latin and the French--my native tongue--approach in regularity
+the order of speech of the feline language. In the latter the order
+of speech is as it was with Adam. Primitively, in the construction
+of sentences, the most important word of the subject matter was
+given first. I claim that all languages would be bettered, to a
+great extent, if this order were observed, and I cannot withhold
+my condemnation of the inconsistent and reckless men who falsely
+asserted themselves to be learned, who carelessly contrived many of
+the languages of communities of people. I believe the language of
+signs to be God's language, and that it cannot be improved upon.
+I never have found a grammar of any language, not even the French
+grammar, all sufficient and adequate to the purposes for which it is
+supposed to have been intended. In fact, you may say that grammars
+are beyond my comprehension, if you like, and I will not deny the
+allegation, for I know that they are beyond the understanding of the
+grand majority of human beings of all tongues.
+
+Neither have I ever found a dictionary, in any language, which gives
+correct definitions of a majority of the words in common use. The
+reader has been informed of my estimation of the great American
+dictionary compiled by Noah Webster, who was, I have no doubt, a
+very good and erudite man, but one subject to strong temptations,
+such, for instance, as those of publishers, whose blandishments are
+irresistible to many writers and apt to mislead the honest author.
+
+In the feline language the rule is to place the noun or the verb
+first in the sentence, thus preparing the mind of the hearer for
+what is to follow. To my thinking, this is the proper form of speech
+and the only arrangement of words for any language. I never could
+admire the speaker who launches out in a mystifying rhapsody on some
+human being or some subject near his heart, by saying something
+after this manner: "Mr. Chairman, I am about to name a gentleman
+who," et cetera, and "a man well known to all the world as a," et
+cetera. In this strain long continued, until the hearers tire of
+the mystification and call loudly, in their justifiable impatience,
+for the inconsistent orator to give the name of the individual, as
+he should have done at first, so that the hearers might compare
+notes while the eulogy was proceeding. When I read, or listen to
+the reading of a letter, I want to know, first of all, the name of
+the writer, for in him centres all the interest I may have in the
+information contained in the communication. By the measure of my
+interest in the writer, I measure the interest in his letter.
+
+According to the primal order of speech and the manner of the
+construction of sentences in the Cat language, you will hear such
+utterances as these: "Milk give me," "Meat I want," "Mary I love,"
+"Going out, my mistress?" "Sick I am," "Happy are my babies."
+
+In the translation of words of the feline language the inflection of
+the voice must constantly be kept in mind, for this, as well as the
+sound, denotes the meaning intended to be conveyed. For instance,
+"meouw," spoken in the ordinary tone of voice, means "how," and is
+a salutation of good-will, expressed in English by "Good morning,"
+"Good evening," or "How d'ye do?" When the same word is uttered in a
+high tone of voice the first syllable "me," strongly emphasized, as
+indicated in "meouw," hatred, or something akin to it, is expressed
+by the feline. Similarly, the word "purrieu," when spoken with a long
+roll of the letter "r" and a rising inflection to the last syllable,
+is a call of the mother to her kittens; when spoken with a shrill
+inflection to the last syllable, the word is a note of warning to
+her loved ones, and when the word is uttered in an ordinary tone
+of voice, while the Cat rubs her side against the dress of her
+mistress, it denotes satisfaction, affection, or it may be a part of
+the feline's system of cajolery. The word "yew," also, when uttered
+as an explosive, is the Cat's strongest expression of hatred, and
+a declaration of war, but it is, also, her word for expressing a
+feeling of pain, or giving notice that she is ill, when uttered in
+an ordinary, or perhaps, in a low tone of voice. In short, there is
+scarcely a word in the feline language whose meaning is not subject
+to four or more directly opposite interpretations, according to the
+inflections given in its expression. "Poopoo" means tired--"poopoo"
+with a slight emphasis upon the first syllable means sleep--"poopoo"
+with a strong emphasis upon the last syllable means work, and this
+drives the paterfamilias out after food for the infants and mother,
+but when the last syllable is spoken in an explosive tone, such as
+poor Mr. Caudle might have uttered when henpecked by his tantalizing
+wife during her curtain lectures. The same word "poopoo" when uttered
+with a falling tone on the last syllable, is an expression of sorrow
+and grief.
+
+I do not know of any sounds more soothing to the nerves of man as
+musical, or as musically correct in rhythm, intonation or melody, as
+the song of the Cat when at peace with all the world. I have listened
+to it many times, and many times endeavored to translate the words of
+the song, but, owing to the fact that she sings with closed mouth,
+no word has been distinct enough to separate from other words of
+the song. Perhaps at no distant day science, through the medium of
+electricity, may furnish a means of discovering not only the words of
+the singer, but also many words of the feline language which, through
+ignorance, are now mouthed by the Cat for lack of knowledge of the
+importance of emphasis and clearness of expression.
+
+
+
+
+XXIV.
+
+THE IMPORTANCE OF SIGNS.
+
+
+Signs, in the feline language, are almost invariably made through
+the medium of the muscles, and are adequate to every expression. To
+this language they are an absolute desideratum. Almost invariably
+they accompany the word-signs of the language from a habitually
+unconstrained feeling and a desire to better convey the meaning of
+the speaker.
+
+To put into words every such expressions is more than word-language
+is capable of, which is the strongest proof of the inadequateness
+of words for the proper and sufficient expression of ideas, and the
+superiority of signs for the manifestation of ideas and desires.
+No tiresome, misleading and fallacious grammar, no stuffy, lame,
+meaningless dictionary, no wearisome spelling-book, containing words
+which are all "at sixes," born in the prize-ring, with a heritage
+of hatred for each other, and refusing forever to become reconciled
+one to the other; no unpronounceable pronouncing dictionary, in
+which words are all zigzag, stubbornly resisting every attempt to
+straighten out and stand them upright, like a man, but determined to
+inscribe themselves upon the brain in every conceivable pyrotechnical
+contempt of straight lines or uniformity in any respect, askew in
+reckless profligacy, in defiance of euphony and as uncontrollable as
+they are funny; no ridiculously prolix analyzer, no hobbling treatise
+upon syntax or prosody of a heterogeneous language of word-signs,
+invented to confound those who seek, as well as those who possess
+a knowledge of the language of signs. Yet many signs refuse to be
+disgraced by being rendered into words.
+
+Noticeable among those of the signs unpronounceable are many
+expressed by the sons of Judah, Levi and Benjamin, such as the
+bending forward of the shoulders and extending of the hands, palms
+upward, and the placing of the index finger to the right hand upon
+the right side of the nose; the Frenchman's shrug of the shoulders,
+the gyration of the Englishman's finger while the end of the thumb
+rests upon the point of his nose; the twirl of the Irishman's
+shillelah, and his expressive manner of puffing smoke from his
+short-stemmed dhudeen; the sudden change from animation to stolidity
+in the German, and the multitudinous and inexpressible signs of the
+gesticulating children of sunny Italy.
+
+In the sign language of the Cat an expression is conveyed in the same
+manner as by the human being, but the feline has a great advantage
+over man in the possession of more utilizing forces. There is the
+language of the ear, the tail, the limb, the body, the facial,
+including the mouth, the nose, the eye, the brow, the chin, the lip
+and the whiskers, the motion of the whole and the significant general
+appearance, as in the carriage while in motion, and the form when at
+rest.
+
+The language of the tail cannot be misinterpreted, suggestive
+as it is of the feelings of the Cat. When she raises it, like a
+flagstaff, we know that she is proud of herself and satisfied with
+her condition, as well as the condition of all other things. When the
+appendage is an appendage to all intents and purposes, and streams
+out in the rear of its possessor, she is not letting the grass grow
+under her feet. When it waves from side to side it is a token of
+dislike of position and significant of a change. When it curls under
+her body it is a sign of fear, and when it is extended with the fur
+on end, "like quills upon the fretful porcupine," there is a strong
+probability that there will be commingled in the air untheological
+imprecations, a sulphurous blue tinge and loose fur. When it lashes
+from side to side it signifies a war of extermination. When it
+twitches, that is a sign of amusement. When it is pointed toward the
+fire it speaks of rain. When it inclines toward the door it says that
+its mistress may go shopping without an umbrella, and while it is
+curled upon its side it betokens that all is quiet along the owner's
+line of life.
+
+These, among many signs given by use of the tail, have been noted by
+everybody. The facial signs are more numerous, and a multitude of
+signs find means of communication through the medium of the ear, the
+limbs, the feet and the trunk. So plain must the signs be to every
+human being, of whatever mental capacity, that I deem it a work of
+supererogation to occupy the reader's time in an explanation of what
+is so palpably apparent, and I therefore leave the subject, hoping
+that watchful care and pleasant study will fully develop the feline
+language to the end that the Cat may be understood as she really
+is, and elevated from a degrading position to one of still greater
+usefulness. In conjunction with the study of the feline language, and
+as an aid to its acquirement, I would recommend the remodeling of the
+English language, so that it may, to a larger degree, be comprehended
+by those who are acquainted with it. I would direct attention
+particularly to the words ending in "ough," such as "cough, bough,
+rough, though, through, although, enough, sough, tough, trough, and
+plough."
+
+I would have you notice that you seem undecided which to say, whether
+"men clothing," or "men's clothing," the plural of "man" being "men."
+You will remember that the plural of "ox" is "oxen," not "oxes," the
+plural of "fox" is not "foxen," but "foxes." I am surprised when I
+take a glass of wine with an English-speaking gentleman to see him
+touch my glass with the rim of his own and to hear him say: "Here
+we go!" while he remains stationary and makes no attempt to leave
+me. I am hoping for the time to come when the reformation of the
+English language will be so complete that when the conductor on a
+tramway cries "look out!" he will mean what he says, so that the
+Frenchman may save his head from being crushed by putting it out of
+the carriage window because of the misdirection of the official of
+the train. I shall hope for such reformation as will save me from
+insulting a widow, unintentionally, by innocently telling her that
+I am aware that her worthy and lamented husband has kicked over the
+bucket, because I was informed that it was the proper expression in
+the English for our French word "mort."
+
+Hoping, by your aid, for better things for my favorite, the Cat, and
+thanking you very much for your kind attention to my paper, I have
+the honor of wishing you au revoir.
+
+  ALPHONSE LEON GRIMALDI.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+The work of the Professor is complete as far as he has gone. I shall
+expect to hear from him again, some day, if his paper meets with
+encouragement from the people of this country.
+
+There can be no doubt that with the aid of the phonograph and other
+modern instruments which have recently been discovered, and which he
+so significantly anticipated in his references to electricity, great
+progress will be made in translating and disseminating the feline
+language. In aid of this object, as well as to provide proper homes
+and medical attendance for the felines, with an eye to their comfort
+and the improvement of the breed, material assistance should be
+given by the ruling powers in every nation. It is a subject of vast
+importance and I leave it for the consideration of the great American
+public and other nations as well.
+
+  MARVIN R. CLARK.
+
+
+
+
+The New Model
+
+Remington
+
+Typewriter.
+
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+
+[Illustration]
+
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+
+SEND FOR NEW ILLUSTRATED CATALOGUE.
+
+  WYCKOFF, SEAMANS & BENEDICT,
+  327 BROADWAY, NEW YORK.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
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+
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+
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+
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+
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+
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+
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+
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+
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+
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+
+RICHARD A. McCURDY, PRESIDENT.
+
+APPLY FOR INFORMATION TO
+
+  C.H. RAYMOND, GENERAL AGENT,
+  59 CEDAR STREET,
+  N.Y. CITY
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+New York Life
+
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+
+
+JANUARY 1, 1895.
+
+  ASSETS                                                 $162,011,770.93
+
+  Liabilities, including the Reserve on all
+    existing Policies (4 per cent. Standard)              141,762,463.20
+                                                          --------------
+  Total Undivided Surplus                                 $20,249,307.73
+                                                          ==============
+  Income, 1894                                            $36,483,313.53
+
+  New Insurance[A] written in 1894                        200,086,251.00
+
+  Outstanding Insurance                                   813,294,160.00
+
+[Footnote A: Instalment Policies are reported at the amounts payable
+immediately at death or end of Endowment Period.]
+
+
+The NEW YORK LIFE'S Accumulation Policy contains no
+restrictions whatever, and only one condition, namely, the payment of
+premiums. It is incontestable from any cause after one year, allows
+a month's grace in payment of premiums, a reinstatement within six
+months if the insured is in good health, and its non-forfeiture
+provisions are self-acting in case no action is taken by the insured.
+After the policy has been in force five full years, loans will be
+made thereon by the Company at 5 per cent. interest.
+
+  JOHN A. McCALL, President.
+  HENRY TUCK, Vice-President.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+"Tom."
+
+H.H.C.
+
+[Illustration]
+
+     We have a nice Tom, he is death to a rat,
+     And his fur is as soft as a mitten,
+     He is spotted with white though as black as a hat
+     And though aged--is as spry as a kitten.
+
+[Illustration]
+
+     Tom never seems tired of washing his face.
+     And he keeps himself tidy and slick
+     He's as cleanly as if he belonged to our race
+     And I think that's why Tom's never sick.
+
+[Illustration]
+
+     I asked him one day as he sat by my side,
+     How he kept himself always so clean.
+     He looked up in my face, seemed to answer with pride
+     They wash me with Pyle's Pur-Pur-_Pearline_.
+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
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+
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+perfect fitting shirts ever made. Open down the front, slips on and
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+
+[Illustration]
+
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+
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+  Men's Outfitter,
+  Cor. Nassau and Ann Sts.,
+  BENNETT BUILDING.
+
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+  POTTER BUILDING.
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+
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+
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+  24-inch, Boys, 20-1/2 lbs.    $40.00
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+  26-inch, Girls, 23-1/2 lbs.   $50.00
+  24-inch, Girls, 23 lbs.       $40.00
+
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+
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+
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+
+[Illustration: CAUTION.]
+
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+
+S-O-H-M-E-R
+
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+
+       *       *       *       *       *
+
+Five... American Musicians
+
+WRITE AS FOLLOWS:
+
+WILLIAM MASON,
+
+     I am of the opinion that the Mason & Hamlin pianofortes are
+     first-class instruments in every particular, being of sound
+     and thorough workmanship and possessing a tone full and
+     sonorous, and at the same time, of sympathetic and musical
+     quality. The action is firm yet sensitive, and quickly
+     responsive to the demands of all the varieties of touch
+     employed in artistic and expressive playing.
+
+GEO. W. CHADWICK,
+
+     The tone is very musical and seems to improve with use. The
+     action is particularly even and firm, and I have never had
+     a piano which stood so well in tune, which is doubtless due
+     to your improved method of stringing. The piano seems to
+     combine power and beauty of tone to a remarkable extent,
+     and I congratulate you on the production of so fine an
+     instrument.
+
+WM. H. SHERWOOD,
+
+     Beautiful instruments, susceptible of the finest grades of
+     expression and shading, and capable of great sonority and
+     power without developing the crashing qualities so frequent
+     in Concert Grands. The large Grand is a success: the action
+     is thoroughly satisfactory and the tone grand.
+
+B.J. LANG,
+
+     The instruments seem to me to be remarkable for their
+     carrying tone so to say. A feeling of firmness and solidity
+     all around is at once noticeable. It would seem to me that
+     these pianofortes must prove a credit to you, and solid
+     satisfaction to those who may play upon them.
+
+HENRY HOLDEN HUSS,
+
+     Their tone is beautiful and very musical, and possesses
+     a decided individuality (a rare quality in pianos). The
+     action is admirable, and the power the pianos have of
+     standing in tune is one of the special and unique features
+     which must be keenly appreciated by those living at a
+     distance from good tuners. In a word, I find the Mason &
+     Hamlin Pianos charming instruments.
+
+CONCERNING THE
+
+Mason & Hamlin
+
+Piano-Fortes.
+
+FOR RENT OR SALE ON EASY PAYMENTS. CATALOGUES MAILED FREE ON
+APPLICATION.
+
+Warerooms: 136 FIFTH AVE., NEW YORK.
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+
+End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Pussy and Her Language, by 
+Marvin R. Clark and Alphonse Leon Grimaldi
+
+*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK 58660 ***