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diff --git a/5787.txt b/5787.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..a63a5f5 --- /dev/null +++ b/5787.txt @@ -0,0 +1,2848 @@ +The Project Gutenberg EBook of A Tramp Abroad, by Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens) + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org + + +Title: A Tramp Abroad + Part 6 + +Author: Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens) + +Release Date: March 1994 [EBook #5787] +Posting Date: June 3, 2009 + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ASCII + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A TRAMP ABROAD *** + + + + +Produced by Anonymous Volunteers, John Greenman and David Widger + + + + + + +A TRAMP ABROAD, Part 6. + +By Mark Twain + +(Samuel L. Clemens) + +First published in 1880 + +Illustrations taken from an 1880 First Edition + + * * * * * * + +ILLUSTRATIONS: + + 1. PORTRAIT OF THE AUTHOR + 2. TITIAN'S MOSES + 3. THE AUTHOR'S MEMORIES + 236. A SUNDAY MORNING'S DEMON + 237. JUST SAVED + 238. SCENE IN VALLEY OF ZERMATT + 239. ARRIVAL AT ZERMATT + 240. FITTED OUT + 241. A FEARFUL FALL + 242. TAIL PIECE + 243. ALL READY + 244. THE MARCH + 245. THE CARAVAN + 246. THE HOOK + 247. THE DISABLED CHAPLAIN + 248. TRYING EXPERIMENTS + 249. SAVED! SAVED! + 250. TWENTY MINUTES WORK + 251. THE BLACK RAM + 252. THE MIRACLE + 253. THE NEW GUIDE + 251. SCIENTIFIC RESEARCHES + 255. MOUNTAIN CHALET + 256. THE GRANDSON + 257. OCCASIONLY MET WITH + 258. SUMMIT OF THE GORNER GRAT + 259. CHIEFS OF THE ADVANCE GUARD + 260. MY PICTURE OF THE MATTERHORN + 261. EVERYBODY HAD AN EXCUSE + 262. SPRUNG A LEAK + 263. A SCIENTIFIC QUESTION + 264. A TERMINAL MORAINE + 265. FRONT OF GLACIER + 266. AN OLD MORAINE + 267. GLACIER OF ZERMATT WITH LATERAL MORAINE + 269. UNEXPECTED MEETING OF FRIENDS + 269. VILLAGE OF CHAMONIX + 270. THE MATTERHORN + 271. ON THE SUMMIT + 272. ACCIDENT ON THE MATTERHORN (1865) + 273. ROPED TOGETHER + 274. STORAGE OF ANCESTORS + 275. FALLING OUT OF HIS FARM + 276. CHILD LIFE IN SWITZERLAND + 277. A SUNDAY PLAY + 278. THE COMBINATION + 279. CHILLON + 280. THE TETE NOIR + 281. MONT BLANC'S NEIGHBORS + 282. AN EXQUISITE THING + 283. A WILD RIDE + 284. SWISS PEASANT GIRL + + + +CONTENTS: CHAPTER XXXVI Sunday Church Bells--A Cause of +Profanity--A Magnificent Glacier--Fault Finding by Harris--Almost +an Accident--Selfishness of Harris--Approaching Zermatt--The +Matterhorn--Zermatt--Home of Mountain Climbers--Fitted out for +Climbing--A Fearful Adventure --Never Satisfied + +CHAPTER XXXVII A Calm Decision--"I Will Ascend the +Riffelberg"--Preparations for the Trip--All Zermatt on the +Alert--Schedule of Persons and Things--An Unprecedented Display--A +General Turn--out--Ready for a Start--The Post of Danger--The Advance +Directed--Grand Display of Umbrellas--The First Camp--Almost a +Panic--Supposed to be Lost--The First Accident--A Chaplain Disabled--An +Experimenting Mule--Good Effects of a Blunder--Badly Lost--A +Reconnoiter--Mystery and Doubt--Stern Measures Taken--A Black Ram--Saved +by a Miracle--The Guide's Guide + +CHAPTER XXXVIII Our Expedition Continued--Experiments with the +Barometer--Boiling Thermometer--Barometer Soup--An Interesting +Scientific Discovery--Crippling a Latinist--A Chaplain Injured--Short +of Barkeepers--Digging a Mountain Cellar--A Young American +Specimen--Somebody's Grandson--Arrival at Riffelberg Botel--Ascent of +Gorner Grat--Faith in Thermometers--The Matterhorn + +CHAPTER XXXIX Guide Books--Plans for the Return of the Expedition--A +Glacier Train--Parachute Descent from Gorner Grat--Proposed Honors +to Harris Declined--All had an Excuse--A Magnificent Idea +Abandoned--Descent to the Glacier--A Supposed Leak--A Slow Train--The +Glacier Abandoned--Journey to Zermatt--A Scientific Question + +CHAPTER XL Glaciers--Glacier Perils--Moraines--Terminal +Moraines--Lateral Moraines--Immense Size of Glacier--Traveling +Glacier----General Movements of Glaciers--Ascent of Mont Blacc--Loss +of Guides--Finding of Remains--Meeting of Old Friends--The Dead and +Living--Proposed Museum--The Relics at Chamonix + +CHAPTER XLI The Matterhorn Catastrophe of 1563--Mr Whymper's +Narrative--Ascent of the Matterhorn--The Summit--The Matterhorn +Conquered--The Descent Commenced--A Fearful Disaster--Death of Lord +Douglas and Two Others--The Graves of the Two + +CHAPTER XLII Switzerland--Graveyard at Zermatt--Balloting for +Marriage--Farmers as Heroes--Falling off a Farm--From St Nicholas to +Visp--Dangerous Traveling--Children's Play--The Parson's Children--A +Landlord's Daughter--A Rare Combination--Ch iIIon--Lost Sympathy--Mont +Blanc and its Neighbors--Beauty of Soap Bubbles--A Wild Drive--The King +of Drivers--Benefit of getting Drunk + + + +CHAPTER XXXVI + +[The Fiendish Fun of Alp-climbing] + + +We did not oversleep at St. Nicholas. The church-bell began to ring at +four-thirty in the morning, and from the length of time it continued +to ring I judged that it takes the Swiss sinner a good while to get the +invitation through his head. Most church-bells in the world are of poor +quality, and have a harsh and rasping sound which upsets the temper and +produces much sin, but the St. Nicholas bell is a good deal the worst +one that has been contrived yet, and is peculiarly maddening in its +operation. Still, it may have its right and its excuse to exist, for the +community is poor and not every citizen can afford a clock, perhaps; but +there cannot be any excuse for our church-bells at home, for there is +no family in America without a clock, and consequently there is no fair +pretext for the usual Sunday medley of dreadful sounds that issues from +our steeples. There is much more profanity in America on Sunday than in +all in the other six days of the week put together, and it is of a more +bitter and malignant character than the week-day profanity, too. It is +produced by the cracked-pot clangor of the cheap church-bells. + + + +We build our churches almost without regard to cost; we rear an edifice +which is an adornment to the town, and we gild it, and fresco it, and +mortgage it, and do everything we can think of to perfect it, and then +spoil it all by putting a bell on it which afflicts everybody who hears +it, giving some the headache, others St. Vitus's dance, and the rest the +blind staggers. + +An American village at ten o'clock on a summer Sunday is the quietest +and peacefulest and holiest thing in nature; but it is a pretty +different thing half an hour later. Mr. Poe's poem of the "Bells" stands +incomplete to this day; but it is well enough that it is so, for the +public reciter or "reader" who goes around trying to imitate the sounds +of the various sorts of bells with his voice would find himself "up a +stump" when he got to the church-bell--as Joseph Addison would say. The +church is always trying to get other people to reform; it might not be +a bad idea to reform itself a little, by way of example. It is still +clinging to one or two things which were useful once, but which are +not useful now, neither are they ornamental. One is the bell-ringing +to remind a clock-caked town that it is church-time, and another is the +reading from the pulpit of a tedious list of "notices" which everybody +who is interested has already read in the newspaper. The clergyman even +reads the hymn through--a relic of an ancient time when hymn-books are +scarce and costly; but everybody has a hymn-book, now, and so the public +reading is no longer necessary. It is not merely unnecessary, it is +generally painful; for the average clergyman could not fire into his +congregation with a shotgun and hit a worse reader than himself, unless +the weapon scattered shamefully. I am not meaning to be flippant and +irreverent, I am only meaning to be truthful. The average clergyman, in +all countries and of all denominations, is a very bad reader. One would +think he would at least learn how to read the Lord's Prayer, by and by, +but it is not so. He races through it as if he thought the quicker +he got it in, the sooner it would be answered. A person who does not +appreciate the exceeding value of pauses, and does not know how to +measure their duration judiciously, cannot render the grand simplicity +and dignity of a composition like that effectively. + +We took a tolerably early breakfast, and tramped off toward Zermatt +through the reeking lanes of the village, glad to get away from that +bell. By and by we had a fine spectacle on our right. It was the +wall-like butt end of a huge glacier, which looked down on us from an +Alpine height which was well up in the blue sky. It was an astonishing +amount of ice to be compacted together in one mass. We ciphered upon it +and decided that it was not less than several hundred feet from the base +of the wall of solid ice to the top of it--Harris believed it was +really twice that. We judged that if St. Paul's, St. Peter's, the Great +Pyramid, the Strasburg Cathedral and the Capitol in Washington were +clustered against that wall, a man sitting on its upper edge could not +hang his hat on the top of any one of them without reaching down three +or four hundred feet--a thing which, of course, no man could do. + +To me, that mighty glacier was very beautiful. I did not imagine that +anybody could find fault with it; but I was mistaken. Harris had been +snarling for several days. He was a rabid Protestant, and he was always +saying: + +"In the Protestant cantons you never see such poverty and dirt and +squalor as you do in this Catholic one; you never see the lanes and +alleys flowing with foulness; you never see such wretched little sties +of houses; you never see an inverted tin turnip on top of a church for +a dome; and as for a church-bell, why, you never hear a church-bell at +all." + +All this morning he had been finding fault, straight along. First it was +with the mud. He said, "It ain't muddy in a Protestant canton when it +rains." Then it was with the dogs: "They don't have those lop-eared dogs +in a Protestant canton." Then it was with the roads: "They don't leave +the roads to make themselves in a Protestant canton, the people make +them--and they make a road that IS a road, too." Next it was the goats: +"You never see a goat shedding tears in a Protestant canton--a goat, +there, is one of the cheerfulest objects in nature." Next it was the +chamois: "You never see a Protestant chamois act like one of these--they +take a bite or two and go; but these fellows camp with you and stay." +Then it was the guide-boards: "In a Protestant canton you couldn't get +lost if you wanted to, but you never see a guide-board in a Catholic +canton." Next, "You never see any flower-boxes in the windows, +here--never anything but now and then a cat--a torpid one; but you take +a Protestant canton: windows perfectly lovely with flowers--and as for +cats, there's just acres of them. These folks in this canton leave a +road to make itself, and then fine you three francs if you 'trot' over +it--as if a horse could trot over such a sarcasm of a road." Next about +the goiter: "THEY talk about goiter!--I haven't seen a goiter in this +whole canton that I couldn't put in a hat." + +He had growled at everything, but I judged it would puzzle him to find +anything the matter with this majestic glacier. I intimated as much; but +he was ready, and said with surly discontent: "You ought to see them in +the Protestant cantons." + +This irritated me. But I concealed the feeling, and asked: + +"What is the matter with this one?" + +"Matter? Why, it ain't in any kind of condition. They never take any +care of a glacier here. The moraine has been spilling gravel around it, +and got it all dirty." + +"Why, man, THEY can't help that." + +"THEY? You're right. That is, they WON'T. They could if they wanted to. +You never see a speck of dirt on a Protestant glacier. Look at the Rhone +glacier. It is fifteen miles long, and seven hundred feet thick. If this +was a Protestant glacier you wouldn't see it looking like this, I can +tell you." + +"That is nonsense. What would they do with it?" + +"They would whitewash it. They always do." + +I did not believe a word of this, but rather than have trouble I let it +go; for it is a waste of breath to argue with a bigot. I even doubted if +the Rhone glacier WAS in a Protestant canton; but I did not know, so I +could not make anything by contradicting a man who would probably put me +down at once with manufactured evidence. + +About nine miles from St. Nicholas we crossed a bridge over the raging +torrent of the Visp, and came to a log strip of flimsy fencing which +was pretending to secure people from tumbling over a perpendicular wall +forty feet high and into the river. Three children were approaching; one +of them, a little girl, about eight years old, was running; when pretty +close to us she stumbled and fell, and her feet shot under the rail of +the fence and for a moment projected over the stream. It gave us a +sharp shock, for we thought she was gone, sure, for the ground slanted +steeply, and to save herself seemed a sheer impossibility; but she +managed to scramble up, and ran by us laughing. + +We went forward and examined the place and saw the long tracks which her +feet had made in the dirt when they darted over the verge. If she had +finished her trip she would have struck some big rocks in the edge of +the water, and then the torrent would have snatched her downstream among +the half-covered boulders and she would have been pounded to pulp in two +minutes. We had come exceedingly near witnessing her death. + + + +And now Harris's contrary nature and inborn selfishness were strikingly +manifested. He has no spirit of self-denial. He began straight off, and +continued for an hour, to express his gratitude that the child was not +destroyed. I never saw such a man. That was the kind of person he was; +just so HE was gratified, he never cared anything about anybody else. I +had noticed that trait in him, over and over again. Often, of course, it +was mere heedlessness, mere want of reflection. Doubtless this may have +been the case in most instances, but it was not the less hard to bar +on that account--and after all, its bottom, its groundwork, was +selfishness. There is no avoiding that conclusion. In the instance under +consideration, I did think the indecency of running on in that way might +occur to him; but no, the child was saved and he was glad, that was +sufficient--he cared not a straw for MY feelings, or my loss of such a +literary plum, snatched from my very mouth at the instant it was +ready to drop into it. His selfishness was sufficient to place his own +gratification in being spared suffering clear before all concern for +me, his friend. Apparently, he did not once reflect upon the valuable +details which would have fallen like a windfall to me: fishing the child +out--witnessing the surprise of the family and the stir the thing would +have made among the peasants--then a Swiss funeral--then the roadside +monument, to be paid for by us and have our names mentioned in it. And +we should have gone into Baedeker and been immortal. I was silent. I was +too much hurt to complain. If he could act so, and be so heedless and so +frivolous at such a time, and actually seem to glory in it, after all +I had done for him, I would have cut my hand off before I would let him +see that I was wounded. + + + +We were approaching Zermatt; consequently, we were approaching the +renowned Matterhorn. A month before, this mountain had been only a name +to us, but latterly we had been moving through a steadily thickening +double row of pictures of it, done in oil, water, chromo, wood, steel, +copper, crayon, and photography, and so it had at length become a shape +to us--and a very distinct, decided, and familiar one, too. We were +expecting to recognize that mountain whenever or wherever we should run +across it. We were not deceived. The monarch was far away when we first +saw him, but there was no such thing as mistaking him. He has the rare +peculiarity of standing by himself; he is peculiarly steep, too, and is +also most oddly shaped. He towers into the sky like a colossal wedge, +with the upper third of its blade bent a little to the left. The broad +base of this monster wedge is planted upon a grand glacier-paved Alpine +platform whose elevation is ten thousand feet above sea-level; as the +wedge itself is some five thousand feet high, it follows that its apex +is about fifteen thousand feet above sea-level. So the whole bulk of +this stately piece of rock, this sky-cleaving monolith, is above the +line of eternal snow. Yet while all its giant neighbors have the look of +being built of solid snow, from their waists up, the Matterhorn stands +black and naked and forbidding, the year round, or merely powdered or +streaked with white in places, for its sides are so steep that the +snow cannot stay there. Its strange form, its august isolation, and its +majestic unkinship with its own kind, make it--so to speak--the Napoleon +of the mountain world. "Grand, gloomy, and peculiar," is a phrase which +fits it as aptly as it fitted the great captain. + +Think of a monument a mile high, standing on a pedestal two miles high! +This is what the Matterhorn is--a monument. Its office, henceforth, for +all time, will be to keep watch and ward over the secret resting-place +of the young Lord Douglas, who, in 1865, was precipitated from the +summit over a precipice four thousand feet high, and never seen again. +No man ever had such a monument as this before; the most imposing of +the world's other monuments are but atoms compared to it; and they will +perish, and their places will pass from memory, but this will remain. + +[The accident which cost Lord Douglas his life (see Chapter xii) also +cost the lives of three other men. These three fell four-fifths of a +mile, and their bodies were afterward found, lying side by side, upon a +glacier, whence they were borne to Zermatt and buried in the churchyard. + +The remains of Lord Douglas have never been found. The secret of his +sepulture, like that of Moses, must remain a mystery always.] + +A walk from St. Nicholas to Zermatt is a wonderful experience. Nature +is built on a stupendous plan in that region. One marches continually +between walls that are piled into the skies, with their upper heights +broken into a confusion of sublime shapes that gleam white and cold +against the background of blue; and here and there one sees a big +glacier displaying its grandeurs on the top of a precipice, or a +graceful cascade leaping and flashing down the green declivities. There +is nothing tame, or cheap, or trivial--it is all magnificent. That +short valley is a picture-gallery of a notable kind, for it contains +no mediocrities; from end to end the Creator has hung it with His +masterpieces. + + + +We made Zermatt at three in the afternoon, nine hours out from +St. Nicholas. Distance, by guide-book, twelve miles; by pedometer +seventy-two. We were in the heart and home of the mountain-climbers, +now, as all visible things testified. The snow-peaks did not hold +themselves aloof, in aristocratic reserve; they nestled close around, +in a friendly, sociable way; guides, with the ropes and axes and other +implements of their fearful calling slung about their persons, roosted +in a long line upon a stone wall in front of the hotel, and waited for +customers; sun-burnt climbers, in mountaineering costume, and followed +by their guides and porters, arrived from time to time, from breakneck +expeditions among the peaks and glaciers of the High Alps; male and +female tourists, on mules, filed by, in a continuous procession, +hotelward-bound from wild adventures which would grow in grandeur every +time they were described at the English or American fireside, and at +last outgrow the possible itself. + +We were not dreaming; this was not a make-believe home of the +Alp-climber, created by our heated imaginations; no, for here was Mr. +Girdlestone himself, the famous Englishman who hunts his way to the most +formidable Alpine summits without a guide. I was not equal to imagining +a Girdlestone; it was all I could do to even realize him, while looking +straight at him at short range. I would rather face whole Hyde Parks of +artillery than the ghastly forms of death which he has faced among the +peaks and precipices of the mountains. There is probably no pleasure +equal to the pleasure of climbing a dangerous Alp; but it is a pleasure +which is confined strictly to people who can find pleasure in it. I have +not jumped to this conclusion; I have traveled to it per gravel-train, +so to speak. I have thought the thing all out, and am quite sure I am +right. A born climber's appetite for climbing is hard to satisfy; when +it comes upon him he is like a starving man with a feast before him; he +may have other business on hand, but it must wait. Mr. Girdlestone had +had his usual summer holiday in the Alps, and had spent it in his usual +way, hunting for unique chances to break his neck; his vacation was +over, and his luggage packed for England, but all of a sudden a hunger +had come upon him to climb the tremendous Weisshorn once more, for he +had heard of a new and utterly impossible route up it. His baggage +was unpacked at once, and now he and a friend, laden with knapsacks, +ice-axes, coils of rope, and canteens of milk, were just setting out. +They would spend the night high up among the snows, somewhere, and +get up at two in the morning and finish the enterprise. I had a +strong desire to go with them, but forced it down--a feat which Mr. +Girdlestone, with all his fortitude, could not do. + +Even ladies catch the climbing mania, and are unable to throw it off. +A famous climber, of that sex, had attempted the Weisshorn a few days +before our arrival, and she and her guides had lost their way in a +snow-storm high up among the peaks and glaciers and been forced to +wander around a good while before they could find a way down. When this +lady reached the bottom, she had been on her feet twenty-three hours! + +Our guides, hired on the Gemmi, were already at Zermatt when we +reached there. So there was nothing to interfere with our getting up an +adventure whenever we should choose the time and the object. I resolved +to devote my first evening in Zermatt to studying up the subject of +Alpine climbing, by way of preparation. + +I read several books, and here are some of the things I found out. One's +shoes must be strong and heavy, and have pointed hobnails in them. The +alpenstock must be of the best wood, for if it should break, loss of +life might be the result. One should carry an ax, to cut steps in the +ice with, on the great heights. There must be a ladder, for there are +steep bits of rock which can be surmounted with this instrument--or this +utensil--but could not be surmounted without it; such an obstruction +has compelled the tourist to waste hours hunting another route, when a +ladder would have saved him all trouble. One must have from one hundred +and fifty to five hundred feet of strong rope, to be used in lowering +the party down steep declivities which are too steep and smooth to +be traversed in any other way. One must have a steel hook, on another +rope--a very useful thing; for when one is ascending and comes to a low +bluff which is yet too high for the ladder, he swings this rope aloft +like a lasso, the hook catches at the top of the bluff, and then the +tourist climbs the rope, hand over hand--being always particular to try +and forget that if the hook gives way he will never stop falling till +he arrives in some part of Switzerland where they are not expecting him. +Another important thing--there must be a rope to tie the whole party +together with, so that if one falls from a mountain or down a bottomless +chasm in a glacier, the others may brace back on the rope and save him. +One must have a silk veil, to protect his face from snow, sleet, hail +and gale, and colored goggles to protect his eyes from that dangerous +enemy, snow-blindness. Finally, there must be some porters, to carry +provisions, wine and scientific instruments, and also blanket bags for +the party to sleep in. + + + +I closed my readings with a fearful adventure which Mr. Whymper once had +on the Matterhorn when he was prowling around alone, five thousand +feet above the town of Breil. He was edging his way gingerly around +the corner of a precipice where the upper edge of a sharp declivity of +ice-glazed snow joined it. This declivity swept down a couple of hundred +feet, into a gully which curved around and ended at a precipice eight +hundred feet high, overlooking a glacier. His foot slipped, and he fell. + +He says: + +"My knapsack brought my head down first, and I pitched into some rocks +about a dozen feet below; they caught something, and tumbled me off +the edge, head over heels, into the gully; the baton was dashed from my +hands, and I whirled downward in a series of bounds, each longer than +the last; now over ice, now into rocks, striking my head four or five +times, each time with increased force. The last bound sent me spinning +through the air in a leap of fifty or sixty feet, from one side of the +gully to the other, and I struck the rocks, luckily, with the whole of +my left side. They caught my clothes for a moment, and I fell back on to +the snow with motion arrested. My head fortunately came the right side +up, and a few frantic catches brought me to a halt, in the neck of the +gully and on the verge of the precipice. Baton, hat, and veil skimmed +by and disappeared, and the crash of the rocks--which I had started--as +they fell on to the glacier, told how narrow had been the escape from +utter destruction. As it was, I fell nearly two hundred feet in seven or +eight bounds. Ten feet more would have taken me in one gigantic leap of +eight hundred feet on to the glacier below. + + + +"The situation was sufficiently serious. The rocks could not be let go +for a moment, and the blood was spurting out of more than twenty cuts. +The most serious ones were in the head, and I vainly tried to close +them with one hand, while holding on with the other. It was useless; +the blood gushed out in blinding jets at each pulsation. At last, in a +moment of inspiration, I kicked out a big lump of snow and struck it +as plaster on my head. The idea was a happy one, and the flow of blood +diminished. Then, scrambling up, I got, not a moment too soon, to +a place of safety, and fainted away. The sun was setting when +consciousness returned, and it was pitch-dark before the Great Staircase +was descended; but by a combination of luck and care, the whole four +thousand seven hundred feet of descent to Breil was accomplished without +a slip, or once missing the way." + +His wounds kept him abed some days. Then he got up and climbed that +mountain again. That is the way with a true Alp-climber; the more fun he +has, the more he wants. + + + +CHAPTER XXXVII + +[Our Imposing Column Starts Upward] + + +After I had finished my readings, I was no longer myself; I was tranced, +uplifted, intoxicated, by the almost incredible perils and adventures +I had been following my authors through, and the triumphs I had been +sharing with them. I sat silent some time, then turned to Harris and +said: + +"My mind is made up." + +Something in my tone struck him: and when he glanced at my eye and +read what was written there, his face paled perceptibly. He hesitated a +moment, then said: + +"Speak." + +I answered, with perfect calmness: + +"I will ascend the Riffelberg." + +If I had shot my poor friend he could not have fallen from his chair +more suddenly. If I had been his father he could not have pleaded harder +to get me to give up my purpose. But I turned a deaf ear to all he said. +When he perceived at last that nothing could alter my determination, he +ceased to urge, and for a while the deep silence was broken only by his +sobs. I sat in marble resolution, with my eyes fixed upon vacancy, for +in spirit I was already wrestling with the perils of the mountains, and +my friend sat gazing at me in adoring admiration through his tears. +At last he threw himself upon me in a loving embrace and exclaimed in +broken tones: + +"Your Harris will never desert you. We will die together." + +I cheered the noble fellow with praises, and soon his fears were +forgotten and he was eager for the adventure. He wanted to summon the +guides at once and leave at two in the morning, as he supposed the +custom was; but I explained that nobody was looking at that hour; and +that the start in the dark was not usually made from the village but +from the first night's resting-place on the mountain side. I said we +would leave the village at 3 or 4 P.M. on the morrow; meantime he could +notify the guides, and also let the public know of the attempt which we +proposed to make. + +I went to bed, but not to sleep. No man can sleep when he is about to +undertake one of these Alpine exploits. I tossed feverishly all night +long, and was glad enough when I heard the clock strike half past eleven +and knew it was time to get up for dinner. I rose, jaded and rusty, and +went to the noon meal, where I found myself the center of interest and +curiosity; for the news was already abroad. It is not easy to eat calmly +when you are a lion; but it is very pleasant, nevertheless. + +As usual, at Zermatt, when a great ascent is about to be undertaken, +everybody, native and foreign, laid aside his own projects and took up +a good position to observe the start. The expedition consisted of 198 +persons, including the mules; or 205, including the cows. As follows: + + CHIEFS OF SERVICE SUBORDINATES + + Myself 1 Veterinary Surgeon + Mr. Harris 1 Butler + 17 Guides 12 Waiters + 4 Surgeons 1 Footman + 1 Geologist 1 Barber + 1 Botanist 1 Head Cook + 3 Chaplains 9 Assistants + 2 Draftsman 4 Pastry Cooks + 15 Barkeepers 1 Confectionery Artist + 1 Latinist + + TRANSPORTATION, ETC. + + 27 Porters 3 Coarse Washers and Ironers + 44 Mules 1 Fine ditto + 44 Muleteers 7 Cows + 2 Milkers + +Total, 154 men, 51 animals. Grand Total, 205. + + + RATIONS, ETC. APPARATUS + + 16 Cases Hams 25 Spring Mattresses + 2 Barrels Flour 2 Hair ditto + 22 Barrels Whiskey Bedding for same + 1 Barrel Sugar 2 Mosquito-nets + 1 Keg Lemons 29 Tents + 2,000 Cigars Scientific Instruments + 1 Barrel Pies 97 Ice-axes + 1 Ton of Pemmican 5 Cases Dynamite + 143 Pair Crutches 7 Cans Nitroglycerin + 2 Barrels Arnica 22 40-foot Ladders + 1 Bale of Lint 2 Miles of Rope + 27 Kegs Paregoric 154 Umbrellas + +It was full four o'clock in the afternoon before my cavalcade was +entirely ready. At that hour it began to move. In point of numbers and +spectacular effect, it was the most imposing expedition that had ever +marched from Zermatt. + + + +I commanded the chief guide to arrange the men and animals in single +file, twelve feet apart, and lash them all together on a strong rope. He +objected that the first two miles was a dead level, with plenty of room, +and that the rope was never used except in very dangerous places. But +I would not listen to that. My reading had taught me that many serious +accidents had happened in the Alps simply from not having the people +tied up soon enough; I was not going to add one to the list. The guide +then obeyed my order. + +When the procession stood at ease, roped together, and ready to move, I +never saw a finer sight. It was 3,122 feet long--over half a mile; every +man and me was on foot, and had on his green veil and his blue goggles, +and his white rag around his hat, and his coil of rope over one shoulder +and under the other, and his ice-ax in his belt, and carried his +alpenstock in his left hand, his umbrella (closed) in his right, and his +crutches slung at his back. The burdens of the pack-mules and the horns +of the cows were decked with the Edelweiss and the Alpine rose. + +I and my agent were the only persons mounted. We were in the post of +danger in the extreme rear, and tied securely to five guides apiece. Our +armor-bearers carried our ice-axes, alpenstocks, and other implements +for us. We were mounted upon very small donkeys, as a measure of safety; +in time of peril we could straighten our legs and stand up, and let +the donkey walk from under. Still, I cannot recommend this sort of +animal--at least for excursions of mere pleasure--because his +ears interrupt the view. I and my agent possessed the regulation +mountaineering costumes, but concluded to leave them behind. Out of +respect for the great numbers of tourists of both sexes who would be +assembled in front of the hotels to see us pass, and also out of respect +for the many tourists whom we expected to encounter on our expedition, +we decided to make the ascent in evening dress. + + + +We watered the caravan at the cold stream which rushes down a trough +near the end of the village, and soon afterward left the haunts of +civilization behind us. About half past five o'clock we arrived at a +bridge which spans the Visp, and after throwing over a detachment to see +if it was safe, the caravan crossed without accident. The way now led, +by a gentle ascent, carpeted with fresh green grass, to the church at +Winkelmatten. Without stopping to examine this edifice, I executed +a flank movement to the right and crossed the bridge over the +Findelenbach, after first testing its strength. Here I deployed to the +right again, and presently entered an inviting stretch of meadowland +which was unoccupied save by a couple of deserted huts toward the +furthest extremity. These meadows offered an excellent camping-place. +We pitched our tents, supped, established a proper grade, recorded the +events of the day, and then went to bed. + +We rose at two in the morning and dressed by candle-light. It was a +dismal and chilly business. A few stars were shining, but the general +heavens were overcast, and the great shaft of the Matterhorn was draped +in a cable pall of clouds. The chief guide advised a delay; he said he +feared it was going to rain. We waited until nine o'clock, and then got +away in tolerably clear weather. + + + +Our course led up some terrific steeps, densely wooded with larches and +cedars, and traversed by paths which the rains had guttered and which +were obstructed by loose stones. To add to the danger and inconvenience, +we were constantly meeting returning tourists on foot and horseback, and +as constantly being crowded and battered by ascending tourists who were +in a hurry and wanted to get by. + +Our troubles thickened. About the middle of the afternoon the seventeen +guides called a halt and held a consultation. After consulting an hour +they said their first suspicion remained intact--that is to say, they +believed they were lost. I asked if they did not KNOW it? No, they said, +they COULDN'T absolutely know whether they were lost or not, because +none of them had ever been in that part of the country before. They had +a strong instinct that they were lost, but they had no proofs--except +that they did not know where they were. They had met no tourists for +some time, and they considered that a suspicious sign. + +Plainly we were in an ugly fix. The guides were naturally unwilling to +go alone and seek a way out of the difficulty; so we all went together. +For better security we moved slow and cautiously, for the forest was +very dense. We did not move up the mountain, but around it, hoping to +strike across the old trail. Toward nightfall, when we were about tired +out, we came up against a rock as big as a cottage. This barrier took +all the remaining spirit out of the men, and a panic of fear and despair +ensued. They moaned and wept, and said they should never see their homes +and their dear ones again. Then they began to upbraid me for bringing +them upon this fatal expedition. Some even muttered threats against me. + +Clearly it was no time to show weakness. So I made a speech in which I +said that other Alp-climbers had been in as perilous a position as this, +and yet by courage and perseverance had escaped. I promised to stand +by them, I promised to rescue them. I closed by saying we had plenty +of provisions to maintain us for quite a siege--and did they suppose +Zermatt would allow half a mile of men and mules to mysteriously +disappear during any considerable time, right above their noses, and +make no inquiries? No, Zermatt would send out searching-expeditions and +we should be saved. + +This speech had a great effect. The men pitched the tents with some +little show of cheerfulness, and we were snugly under cover when the +night shut down. I now reaped the reward of my wisdom in providing one +article which is not mentioned in any book of Alpine adventure but this. +I refer to the paregoric. But for that beneficent drug, would have not +one of those men slept a moment during that fearful night. But for that +gentle persuader they must have tossed, unsoothed, the night through; +for the whiskey was for me. Yes, they would have risen in the morning +unfitted for their heavy task. As it was, everybody slept but my agent +and me--only we and the barkeepers. I would not permit myself to sleep +at such a time. I considered myself responsible for all those lives. I +meant to be on hand and ready, in case of avalanches up there, but I did +not know it then. + +We watched the weather all through that awful night, and kept an eye on +the barometer, to be prepared for the least change. There was not the +slightest change recorded by the instrument, during the whole time. +Words cannot describe the comfort that that friendly, hopeful, steadfast +thing was to me in that season of trouble. It was a defective barometer, +and had no hand but the stationary brass pointer, but I did not know +that until afterward. If I should be in such a situation again, I should +not wish for any barometer but that one. + + + +All hands rose at two in the morning and took breakfast, and as soon as +it was light we roped ourselves together and went at that rock. For some +time we tried the hook-rope and other means of scaling it, but without +success--that is, without perfect success. The hook caught once, and +Harris started up it hand over hand, but the hold broke and if there +had not happened to be a chaplain sitting underneath at the time, Harris +would certainly have been crippled. As it was, it was the chaplain. He +took to his crutches, and I ordered the hook-rope to be laid aside. It +was too dangerous an implement where so many people are standing around. + + + +We were puzzled for a while; then somebody thought of the ladders. +One of these was leaned against the rock, and the men went up it tied +together in couples. Another ladder was sent up for use in descending. +At the end of half an hour everybody was over, and that rock was +conquered. We gave our first grand shout of triumph. But the joy was +short-lived, for somebody asked how we were going to get the animals +over. + +This was a serious difficulty; in fact, it was an impossibility. +The courage of the men began to waver immediately; once more we were +threatened with a panic. But when the danger was most imminent, we were +saved in a mysterious way. A mule which had attracted attention from the +beginning by its disposition to experiment, tried to eat a five-pound +can of nitroglycerin. This happened right alongside the rock. The +explosion threw us all to the ground, and covered us with dirt and +debris; it frightened us extremely, too, for the crash it made was +deafening, and the violence of the shock made the ground tremble. +However, we were grateful, for the rock was gone. Its place was occupied +by a new cellar, about thirty feet across, by fifteen feet deep. The +explosion was heard as far as Zermatt; and an hour and a half afterward, +many citizens of that town were knocked down and quite seriously injured +by descending portions of mule meat, frozen solid. This shows, better +than any estimate in figures, how high the experimenter went. + + + +We had nothing to do, now, but bridge the cellar and proceed on our way. +With a cheer the men went at their work. I attended to the engineering, +myself. I appointed a strong detail to cut down trees with ice-axes and +trim them for piers to support the bridge. This was a slow business, for +ice-axes are not good to cut wood with. I caused my piers to be firmly +set up in ranks in the cellar, and upon them I laid six of my forty-foot +ladders, side by side, and laid six more on top of them. Upon this +bridge I caused a bed of boughs to be spread, and on top of the boughs +a bed of earth six inches deep. I stretched ropes upon either side to +serve as railings, and then my bridge was complete. A train of elephants +could have crossed it in safety and comfort. By nightfall the caravan +was on the other side and the ladders were taken up. + +Next morning we went on in good spirits for a while, though our way +was slow and difficult, by reason of the steep and rocky nature of the +ground and the thickness of the forest; but at last a dull despondency +crept into the men's faces and it was apparent that not only they, but +even the guides, were now convinced that we were lost. The fact that we +still met no tourists was a circumstance that was but too significant. +Another thing seemed to suggest that we were not only lost, but very +badly lost; for there must surely be searching-parties on the road +before this time, yet we had seen no sign of them. + +Demoralization was spreading; something must be done, and done quickly, +too. Fortunately, I am not unfertile in expedients. I contrived one +now which commended itself to all, for it promised well. I took +three-quarters of a mile of rope and fastened one end of it around the +waist of a guide, and told him to go find the road, while the caravan +waited. I instructed him to guide himself back by the rope, in case of +failure; in case of success, he was to give the rope a series of violent +jerks, whereupon the Expedition would go to him at once. He departed, +and in two minutes had disappeared among the trees. I payed out the rope +myself, while everybody watched the crawling thing with eager eyes. +The rope crept away quite slowly, at times, at other times with some +briskness. Twice or thrice we seemed to get the signal, and a shout was +just ready to break from the men's lips when they perceived it was a +false alarm. But at last, when over half a mile of rope had slidden +away, it stopped gliding and stood absolutely still--one minute--two +minutes--three--while we held our breath and watched. + +Was the guide resting? Was he scanning the country from some high point? +Was he inquiring of a chance mountaineer? Stop,--had he fainted from +excess of fatigue and anxiety? + +This thought gave us a shock. I was in the very first act of detailing +an Expedition to succor him, when the cord was assailed with a series of +such frantic jerks that I could hardly keep hold of it. The huzza that +went up, then, was good to hear. "Saved! saved!" was the word that rang +out, all down the long rank of the caravan. + + + +We rose up and started at once. We found the route to be good enough +for a while, but it began to grow difficult, by and by, and this feature +steadily increased. When we judged we had gone half a mile, we momently +expected to see the guide; but no, he was not visible anywhere; neither +was he waiting, for the rope was still moving, consequently he was +doing the same. This argued that he had not found the road, yet, but +was marching to it with some peasant. There was nothing for us to do +but plod along--and this we did. At the end of three hours we were +still plodding. This was not only mysterious, but exasperating. And very +fatiguing, too; for we had tried hard, along at first, to catch up with +the guide, but had only fagged ourselves, in vain; for although he was +traveling slowly he was yet able to go faster than the hampered caravan +over such ground. + +At three in the afternoon we were nearly dead with exhaustion--and still +the rope was slowly gliding out. The murmurs against the guide had been +growing steadily, and at last they were become loud and savage. A mutiny +ensued. The men refused to proceed. They declared that we had been +traveling over and over the same ground all day, in a kind of circle. +They demanded that our end of the rope be made fast to a tree, so as to +halt the guide until we could overtake him and kill him. This was not an +unreasonable requirement, so I gave the order. + +As soon as the rope was tied, the Expedition moved forward with that +alacrity which the thirst for vengeance usually inspires. But after a +tiresome march of almost half a mile, we came to a hill covered thick +with a crumbly rubbish of stones, and so steep that no man of us all +was now in a condition to climb it. Every attempt failed, and ended in +crippling somebody. Within twenty minutes I had five men on crutches. + + + +Whenever a climber tried to assist himself by the rope, it yielded and +let him tumble backward. The frequency of this result suggested an idea +to me. I ordered the caravan to 'bout face and form in marching order; I +then made the tow-rope fast to the rear mule, and gave the command: + +"Mark time--by the right flank--forward--march!" + + + +The procession began to move, to the impressive strains of a +battle-chant, and I said to myself, "Now, if the rope don't break I +judge THIS will fetch that guide into the camp." I watched the rope +gliding down the hill, and presently when I was all fixed for triumph +I was confronted by a bitter disappointment; there was no guide tied to +the rope, it was only a very indignant old black ram. The fury of the +baffled Expedition exceeded all bounds. They even wanted to wreak their +unreasoning vengeance on this innocent dumb brute. But I stood between +them and their prey, menaced by a bristling wall of ice-axes and +alpenstocks, and proclaimed that there was but one road to this murder, +and it was directly over my corpse. Even as I spoke I saw that my doom +was sealed, except a miracle supervened to divert these madmen from +their fell purpose. I see the sickening wall of weapons now; I see that +advancing host as I saw it then, I see the hate in those cruel eyes; I +remember how I drooped my head upon my breast, I feel again the +sudden earthquake shock in my rear, administered by the very ram I was +sacrificing myself to save; I hear once more the typhoon of laughter +that burst from the assaulting column as I clove it from van to rear +like a Sepoy shot from a Rodman gun. + + + +I was saved. Yes, I was saved, and by the merciful instinct of +ingratitude which nature had planted in the breast of that treacherous +beast. The grace which eloquence had failed to work in those men's +hearts, had been wrought by a laugh. The ram was set free and my life +was spared. + +We lived to find out that that guide had deserted us as soon as he had +placed a half-mile between himself and us. To avert suspicion, he had +judged it best that the line should continue to move; so he caught that +ram, and at the time that he was sitting on it making the rope fast to +it, we were imagining that he was lying in a swoon, overcome by fatigue +and distress. When he allowed the ram to get up it fell to plunging +around, trying to rid itself of the rope, and this was the signal which +we had risen up with glad shouts to obey. We had followed this ram round +and round in a circle all day--a thing which was proven by the discovery +that we had watered the Expedition seven times at one and same spring in +seven hours. As expert a woodman as I am, I had somehow failed to notice +this until my attention was called to it by a hog. This hog was always +wallowing there, and as he was the only hog we saw, his frequent +repetition, together with his unvarying similarity to himself, finally +caused me to reflect that he must be the same hog, and this led me to +the deduction that this must be the same spring, also--which indeed it +was. + +I made a note of this curious thing, as showing in a striking manner the +relative difference between glacial action and the action of the hog. +It is now a well-established fact that glaciers move; I consider that +my observations go to show, with equal conclusiveness, that a hog in a +spring does not move. I shall be glad to receive the opinions of other +observers upon this point. + +To return, for an explanatory moment, to that guide, and then I shall be +done with him. After leaving the ram tied to the rope, he had wandered +at large a while, and then happened to run across a cow. Judging that a +cow would naturally know more than a guide, he took her by the tail, +and the result justified his judgment. She nibbled her leisurely way +downhill till it was near milking-time, then she struck for home and +towed him into Zermatt. + + + +CHAPTER XXXVIII + +[I Conquer the Gorner Grat] + + +We went into camp on that wild spot to which that ram had brought us. +The men were greatly fatigued. Their conviction that we were lost was +forgotten in the cheer of a good supper, and before the reaction had a +chance to set in, I loaded them up with paregoric and put them to bed. + +Next morning I was considering in my mind our desperate situation and +trying to think of a remedy, when Harris came to me with a Baedeker +map which showed conclusively that the mountain we were on was still in +Switzerland--yes, every part of it was in Switzerland. So we were not +lost, after all. This was an immense relief; it lifted the weight of two +such mountains from my breast. I immediately had the news disseminated +and the map was exhibited. The effect was wonderful. As soon as the men +saw with their own eyes that they knew where they were, and that it +was only the summit that was lost and not themselves, they cheered up +instantly and said with one accord, let the summit take care of itself. + +Our distresses being at an end, I now determined to rest the men in camp +and give the scientific department of the Expedition a chance. First, +I made a barometric observation, to get our altitude, but I could not +perceive that there was any result. I knew, by my scientific reading, +that either thermometers or barometers ought to be boiled, to make them +accurate; I did not know which it was, so I boiled them both. There was +still no result; so I examined these instruments and discovered that +they possessed radical blemishes: the barometer had no hand but the +brass pointer and the ball of the thermometer was stuffed with tin-foil. +I might have boiled those things to rags, and never found out anything. + +I hunted up another barometer; it was new and perfect. I boiled it half +an hour in a pot of bean soup which the cooks were making. The result +was unexpected: the instrument was not affecting at all, but there was +such a strong barometer taste to the soup that the head cook, who was +a most conscientious person, changed its name in the bill of fare. +The dish was so greatly liked by all, that I ordered the cook to have +barometer soup every day. + + + +It was believed that the barometer might eventually be injured, but I +did not care for that. I had demonstrated to my satisfaction that it +could not tell how high a mountain was, therefore I had no real use for +it. Changes in the weather I could take care of without it; I did not +wish to know when the weather was going to be good, what I wanted to +know was when it was going to be bad, and this I could find out from +Harris's corns. Harris had had his corns tested and regulated at the +government observatory in Heidelberg, and one could depend upon them +with confidence. So I transferred the new barometer to the cooking +department, to be used for the official mess. It was found that even a +pretty fair article of soup could be made from the defective barometer; +so I allowed that one to be transferred to the subordinate mess. + +I next boiled the thermometer, and got a most excellent result; the +mercury went up to about 200 degrees Fahrenheit. In the opinion of the +other scientists of the Expedition, this seemed to indicate that we had +attained the extraordinary altitude of two hundred thousand feet above +sea-level. Science places the line of eternal snow at about ten thousand +feet above sea-level. There was no snow where we were, consequently +it was proven that the eternal snow-line ceases somewhere above the +ten-thousand-foot level and does not begin any more. This was an +interesting fact, and one which had not been observed by any observer +before. It was as valuable as interesting, too, since it would open up +the deserted summits of the highest Alps to population and agriculture. +It was a proud thing to be where we were, yet it caused us a pang +to reflect that but for that ram we might just as well have been two +hundred thousand feet higher. + +The success of my last experiment induced me to try an experiment with +my photographic apparatus. I got it out, and boiled one of my cameras, +but the thing was a failure; it made the wood swell up and burst, and I +could not see that the lenses were any better than they were before. + +I now concluded to boil a guide. It might improve him, it could not +impair his usefulness. But I was not allowed to proceed. Guides have +no feeling for science, and this one would not consent to be made +uncomfortable in its interest. + +In the midst of my scientific work, one of those needless accidents +happened which are always occurring among the ignorant and thoughtless. +A porter shot at a chamois and missed it and crippled the Latinist. +This was not a serious matter to me, for a Latinist's duties are as well +performed on crutches as otherwise--but the fact remained that if the +Latinist had not happened to be in the way a mule would have got that +load. That would have been quite another matter, for when it comes down +to a question of value there is a palpable difference between a Latinist +and a mule. I could not depend on having a Latinist in the right place +every time; so, to make things safe, I ordered that in the future the +chamois must not be hunted within limits of the camp with any other +weapon than the forefinger. + +My nerves had hardly grown quiet after this affair when they got another +shake-up--one which utterly unmanned me for a moment: a rumor swept +suddenly through the camp that one of the barkeepers had fallen over a +precipice! + +However, it turned out that it was only a chaplain. I had laid in an +extra force of chaplains, purposely to be prepared for emergencies +like this, but by some unaccountable oversight had come away rather +short-handed in the matter of barkeepers. + +On the following morning we moved on, well refreshed and in good +spirits. I remember this day with peculiar pleasure, because it saw +our road restored to us. Yes, we found our road again, and in quite an +extraordinary way. We had plodded along some two hours and a half, when +we came up against a solid mass of rock about twenty feet high. I did +not need to be instructed by a mule this time. I was already beginning +to know more than any mule in the Expedition. I at once put in a blast +of dynamite, and lifted that rock out of the way. But to my surprise and +mortification, I found that there had been a chalet on top of it. + +I picked up such members of the family as fell in my vicinity, and +subordinates of my corps collected the rest. None of these poor people +were injured, happily, but they were much annoyed. I explained to +the head chaleteer just how the thing happened, and that I was only +searching for the road, and would certainly have given him timely notice +if I had known he was up there. I said I had meant no harm, and hoped +I had not lowered myself in his estimation by raising him a few rods in +the air. I said many other judicious things, and finally when I offered +to rebuild his chalet, and pay for the breakages, and throw in the +cellar, he was mollified and satisfied. He hadn't any cellar at all, +before; he would not have as good a view, now, as formerly, but what he +had lost in view he had gained in cellar, by exact measurement. He said +there wasn't another hole like that in the mountains--and he would have +been right if the late mule had not tried to eat up the nitroglycerin. + +I put a hundred and sixteen men at work, and they rebuilt the chalet +from its own debris in fifteen minutes. It was a good deal more +picturesque than it was before, too. The man said we were now on the +Feil-Stutz, above the Schwegmatt--information which I was glad to get, +since it gave us our position to a degree of particularity which we had +not been accustomed to for a day or so. We also learned that we were +standing at the foot of the Riffelberg proper, and that the initial +chapter of our work was completed. + + + +We had a fine view, from here, of the energetic Visp, as it makes its +first plunge into the world from under a huge arch of solid ice, worn +through the foot-wall of the great Gorner Glacier; and we could also see +the Furggenbach, which is the outlet of the Furggen Glacier. + +The mule-road to the summit of the Riffelberg passed right in front of +the chalet, a circumstance which we almost immediately noticed, because +a procession of tourists was filing along it pretty much all the time. + +"Pretty much" may not be elegant English, but it is high time it was. +There is no elegant word or phrase which means just what it means.--M.T. + +The chaleteer's business consisted in furnishing refreshments to +tourists. My blast had interrupted this trade for a few minutes, by +breaking all the bottles on the place; but I gave the man a lot of +whiskey to sell for Alpine champagne, and a lot of vinegar which would +answer for Rhine wine, consequently trade was soon as brisk as ever. + +Leaving the Expedition outside to rest, I quartered myself in the +chalet, with Harris, proposing to correct my journals and scientific +observations before continuing the ascent. I had hardly begun my work +when a tall, slender, vigorous American youth of about twenty-three, who +was on his way down the mountain, entered and came toward me with that +breezy self-complacency which is the adolescent's idea of the well-bred +ease of the man of the world. His hair was short and parted accurately +in the middle, and he had all the look of an American person who would +be likely to begin his signature with an initial, and spell his middle +name out. He introduced himself, smiling a smirky smile borrowed from +the courtiers of the stage, extended a fair-skinned talon, and while he +gripped my hand in it he bent his body forward three times at the +hips, as the stage courtier does, and said in the airiest and most +condescending and patronizing way--I quite remember his exact language: + +"Very glad to make your acquaintance, 'm sure; very glad indeed, assure +you. I've read all your little efforts and greatly admired them, and +when I heard you were here, I ..." + +I indicated a chair, and he sat down. This grandee was the grandson of +an American of considerable note in his day, and not wholly forgotten +yet--a man who came so near being a great man that he was quite +generally accounted one while he lived. + + + +I slowly paced the floor, pondering scientific problems, and heard this +conversation: + +GRANDSON. First visit to Europe? + +HARRIS. Mine? Yes. + +G.S. (With a soft reminiscent sigh suggestive of bygone joys that may +be tasted in their freshness but once.) Ah, I know what it is to you. A +first visit!--ah, the romance of it! I wish I could feel it again. + +H. Yes, I find it exceeds all my dreams. It is enchantment. I go... + +G.S. (With a dainty gesture of the hand signifying "Spare me your callow +enthusiasms, good friend.") Yes, _I_ know, I know; you go to cathedrals, +and exclaim; and you drag through league-long picture-galleries and +exclaim; and you stand here, and there, and yonder, upon historic +ground, and continue to exclaim; and you are permeated with your first +crude conceptions of Art, and are proud and happy. Ah, yes, proud and +happy--that expresses it. Yes-yes, enjoy it--it is right--it is an +innocent revel. + +H. And you? Don't you do these things now? + +G.S. I! Oh, that is VERY good! My dear sir, when you are as old a +traveler as I am, you will not ask such a question as that. _I_ visit +the regulation gallery, moon around the regulation cathedral, do the +worn round of the regulation sights, YET?--Excuse me! + +H. Well, what DO you do, then? + +G.S. Do? I flit--and flit--for I am ever on the wing--but I avoid the +herd. Today I am in Paris, tomorrow in Berlin, anon in Rome; but you +would look for me in vain in the galleries of the Louvre or the common +resorts of the gazers in those other capitals. If you would find me, you +must look in the unvisited nooks and corners where others never think +of going. One day you will find me making myself at home in some obscure +peasant's cabin, another day you will find me in some forgotten castle +worshiping some little gem or art which the careless eye has overlooked +and which the unexperienced would despise; again you will find me as +guest in the inner sanctuaries of palaces while the herd is content to +get a hurried glimpse of the unused chambers by feeing a servant. + +H. You are a GUEST in such places? + +G.S. And a welcoming one. + +H. It is surprising. How does it come? + +G.S. My grandfather's name is a passport to all the courts in Europe. I +have only to utter that name and every door is open to me. I flit from +court to court at my own free will and pleasure, and am always welcome. +I am as much at home in the palaces of Europe as you are among your +relatives. I know every titled person in Europe, I think. I have my +pockets full of invitations all the time. I am under promise to go to +Italy, where I am to be the guest of a succession of the noblest houses +in the land. In Berlin my life is a continued round of gaiety in the +imperial palace. It is the same, wherever I go. + +H. It must be very pleasant. But it must make Boston seem a little slow +when you are at home. + +G.S. Yes, of course it does. But I don't go home much. There's no life +there--little to feed a man's higher nature. Boston's very narrow, you +know. She doesn't know it, and you couldn't convince her of it--so I say +nothing when I'm there: where's the use? Yes, Boston is very narrow, but +she has such a good opinion of herself that she can't see it. A man who +has traveled as much as I have, and seen as much of the world, sees it +plain enough, but he can't cure it, you know, so the best is to leave it +and seek a sphere which is more in harmony with his tastes and culture. +I run across there, once a year, perhaps, when I have nothing important +on hand, but I'm very soon back again. I spend my time in Europe. + +H. I see. You map out your plans and ... + +G.S. No, excuse me. I don't map out any plans. I simply follow the +inclination of the day. I am limited by no ties, no requirements, I +am not bound in any way. I am too old a traveler to hamper myself with +deliberate purposes. I am simply a traveler--an inveterate traveler--a +man of the world, in a word--I can call myself by no other name. I do +not say, "I am going here, or I am going there"--I say nothing at all, I +only act. For instance, next week you may find me the guest of a grandee +of Spain, or you may find me off for Venice, or flitting toward Dresden. +I shall probably go to Egypt presently; friends will say to friends, +"He is at the Nile cataracts"--and at that very moment they will be +surprised to learn that I'm away off yonder in India somewhere. I am +a constant surprise to people. They are always saying, "Yes, he was +in Jerusalem when we heard of him last, but goodness knows where he is +now." + +Presently the Grandson rose to leave--discovered he had an appointment +with some Emperor, perhaps. He did his graces over again: gripped me +with one talon, at arm's-length, pressed his hat against his stomach +with the other, bent his body in the middle three times, murmuring: + +"Pleasure, 'm sure; great pleasure, 'm sure. Wish you much success." + +Then he removed his gracious presence. It is a great and solemn thing to +have a grandfather. + +I have not purposed to misrepresent this boy in any way, for what little +indignation he excited in me soon passed and left nothing behind it but +compassion. One cannot keep up a grudge against a vacuum. I have tried +to repeat this lad's very words; if I have failed anywhere I have at +least not failed to reproduce the marrow and meaning of what he said. +He and the innocent chatterbox whom I met on the Swiss lake are the most +unique and interesting specimens of Young America I came across +during my foreign tramping. I have made honest portraits of them, not +caricatures. + + + +The Grandson of twenty-three referred to himself five or six times as +an "old traveler," and as many as three times (with a serene complacency +which was maddening) as a "man of the world." There was something very +delicious about his leaving Boston to her "narrowness," unreproved and +uninstructed. + +I formed the caravan in marching order, presently, and after riding down +the line to see that it was properly roped together, gave the command to +proceed. In a little while the road carried us to open, grassy land. We +were above the troublesome forest, now, and had an uninterrupted view, +straight before us, of our summit--the summit of the Riffelberg. + +We followed the mule-road, a zigzag course, now to the right, now to +the left, but always up, and always crowded and incommoded by going and +coming files of reckless tourists who were never, in a single instance, +tied together. I was obliged to exert the utmost care and caution, for +in many places the road was not two yards wide, and often the lower side +of it sloped away in slanting precipices eight and even nine feet deep. +I had to encourage the men constantly, to keep them from giving way to +their unmanly fears. + +We might have made the summit before night, but for a delay caused by +the loss of an umbrella. I was allowing the umbrella to remain lost, but +the men murmured, and with reason, for in this exposed region we stood +in peculiar need of protection against avalanches; so I went into camp +and detached a strong party to go after the missing article. + +The difficulties of the next morning were severe, but our courage +was high, for our goal was near. At noon we conquered the last +impediment--we stood at last upon the summit, and without the loss of a +single man except the mule that ate the glycerin. Our great achievement +was achieved--the possibility of the impossible was demonstrated, and +Harris and I walked proudly into the great dining-room of the Riffelberg +Hotel and stood our alpenstocks up in the corner. + +Yes, I had made the grand ascent; but it was a mistake to do it in +evening dress. The plug hats were battered, the swallow-tails were +fluttering rags, mud added no grace, the general effect was unpleasant +and even disreputable. + + + +There were about seventy-five tourists at the hotel--mainly ladies and +little children--and they gave us an admiring welcome which paid us for +all our privations and sufferings. The ascent had been made, and the +names and dates now stand recorded on a stone monument there to prove it +to all future tourists. + +I boiled a thermometer and took an altitude, with a most curious result: +THE SUMMIT WAS NOT AS HIGH AS THE POINT ON THE MOUNTAINSIDE WHERE I +HAD TAKEN THE FIRST ALTITUDE. Suspecting that I had made an important +discovery, I prepared to verify it. There happened to be a still higher +summit (called the Gorner Grat), above the hotel, and notwithstanding +the fact that it overlooks a glacier from a dizzy height, and that the +ascent is difficult and dangerous, I resolved to venture up there and +boil a thermometer. So I sent a strong party, with some borrowed hoes, +in charge of two chiefs of service, to dig a stairway in the soil all +the way up, and this I ascended, roped to the guides. This breezy height +was the summit proper--so I accomplished even more than I had originally +purposed to do. This foolhardy exploit is recorded on another stone +monument. + + + +I boiled my thermometer, and sure enough, this spot, which purported to +be two thousand feet higher than the locality of the hotel, turned out +to be nine thousand feet LOWER. Thus the fact was clearly demonstrated +that, ABOVE A CERTAIN POINT, THE HIGHER A POINT SEEMS TO BE, THE LOWER +IT ACTUALLY IS. Our ascent itself was a great achievement, but this +contribution to science was an inconceivably greater matter. + +Cavilers object that water boils at a lower and lower temperature the +higher and higher you go, and hence the apparent anomaly. I answer that +I do not base my theory upon what the boiling water does, but upon what +a boiled thermometer says. You can't go behind the thermometer. + +I had a magnificent view of Monte Rosa, and apparently all the rest of +the Alpine world, from that high place. All the circling horizon was +piled high with a mighty tumult of snowy crests. One might have +imagined he saw before him the tented camps of a beleaguering host of +Brobdingnagians. + + + +NOTE.--I had the very unusual luck to catch one little momentary glimpse +of the Matterhorn wholly unencumbered by clouds. I leveled my +photographic apparatus at it without the loss of an instant, and should +have got an elegant picture if my donkey had not interfered. It was my +purpose to draw this photograph all by myself for my book, but was +obliged to put the mountain part of it into the hands of the +professional artist because I found I could not do landscape well. + +But lonely, conspicuous, and superb, rose that wonderful upright wedge, +the Matterhorn. Its precipitous sides were powdered over with snow, and +the upper half hidden in thick clouds which now and then dissolved to +cobweb films and gave brief glimpses of the imposing tower as through a +veil. A little later the Matterhorn took to himself the semblance of +a volcano; he was stripped naked to his apex--around this circled +vast wreaths of white cloud which strung slowly out and streamed away +slantwise toward the sun, a twenty-mile stretch of rolling and tumbling +vapor, and looking just as if it were pouring out of a crater. Later +again, one of the mountain's sides was clean and clear, and another +side densely clothed from base to summit in thick smokelike cloud which +feathered off and flew around the shaft's sharp edge like the smoke +around the corners of a burning building. The Matterhorn is always +experimenting, and always gets up fine effects, too. In the sunset, when +all the lower world is palled in gloom, it points toward heaven out of +the pervading blackness like a finger of fire. In the sunrise--well, +they say it is very fine in the sunrise. + +Authorities agree that there is no such tremendous "layout" of snowy +Alpine magnitude, grandeur, and sublimity to be seen from any other +accessible point as the tourist may see from the summit of the +Riffelberg. Therefore, let the tourist rope himself up and go there; for +I have shown that with nerve, caution, and judgment, the thing can be +done. + +I wish to add one remark, here--in parentheses, so to speak--suggested +by the word "snowy," which I have just used. We have all seen hills and +mountains and levels with snow on them, and so we think we know all the +aspects and effects produced by snow. But indeed we do not until we have +seen the Alps. Possibly mass and distance add something--at any rate, +something IS added. Among other noticeable things, there is a dazzling, +intense whiteness about the distant Alpine snow, when the sun is on it, +which one recognizes as peculiar, and not familiar to the eye. The snow +which one is accustomed to has a tint to it--painters usually give it a +bluish cast--but there is no perceptible tint to the distant Alpine snow +when it is trying to look its whitest. As to the unimaginable +splendor of it when the sun is blazing down on it--well, it simply IS +unimaginable. + + + +CHAPTER XXXIX + +[We Travel by Glacier] + + +A guide-book is a queer thing. The reader has just seen what a man who +undertakes the great ascent from Zermatt to the Riffelberg Hotel must +experience. Yet Baedeker makes these strange statements concerning this +matter: + + 1. Distance--3 hours. + 2. The road cannot be mistaken. + 3. Guide unnecessary. + 4. Distance from Riffelberg Hotel to the Gorner Grat, one hour and a half. + 5. Ascent simple and easy. Guide unnecessary. + 6. Elevation of Zermatt above sea-level, 5,315 feet. + 7. Elevation of Riffelberg Hotel above sea-level, 8,429 feet. + 8. Elevation of the Gorner Grat above sea-level, 10,289 feet. + +I have pretty effectually throttled these errors by sending him the +following demonstrated facts: + + 1. Distance from Zermatt to Riffelberg Hotel, 7 days. + 2. The road CAN be mistaken. If I am the first that did it, I want the credit + of it, too. + 3. Guides ARE necessary, for none but a native can read those finger-boards. + 4. The estimate of the elevation of the several localities above sea-level + is pretty correct--for Baedeker. He only misses it about a hundred and + eighty or ninety thousand feet. + +I found my arnica invaluable. My men were suffering excruciatingly, from +the friction of sitting down so much. During two or three days, not +one of them was able to do more than lie down or walk about; yet so +effective was the arnica, that on the fourth all were able to sit up. +I consider that, more than to anything else, I owe the success of our +great undertaking to arnica and paregoric. + +My men are being restored to health and strength, my main perplexity, +now, was how to get them down the mountain again. I was not willing to +expose the brave fellows to the perils, fatigues, and hardships of that +fearful route again if it could be helped. First I thought of balloons; +but, of course, I had to give that idea up, for balloons were +not procurable. I thought of several other expedients, but upon +consideration discarded them, for cause. But at last I hit it. I was +aware that the movement of glaciers is an established fact, for I had +read it in Baedeker; so I resolved to take passage for Zermatt on the +great Gorner Glacier. + +Very good. The next thing was, how to get down the glacier +comfortably--for the mule-road to it was long, and winding, and +wearisome. I set my mind at work, and soon thought out a plan. One looks +straight down upon the vast frozen river called the Gorner Glacier, from +the Gorner Grat, a sheer precipice twelve hundred feet high. We had +one hundred and fifty-four umbrellas--and what is an umbrella but a +parachute? + +I mentioned this noble idea to Harris, with enthusiasm, and was about to +order the Expedition to form on the Gorner Grat, with their umbrellas, +and prepare for flight by platoons, each platoon in command of a guide, +when Harris stopped me and urged me not to be too hasty. He asked me if +this method of descending the Alps had ever been tried before. I said +no, I had not heard of an instance. Then, in his opinion, it was a +matter of considerable gravity; in his opinion it would not be well to +send the whole command over the cliff at once; a better way would be to +send down a single individual, first, and see how he fared. + +I saw the wisdom in this idea instantly. I said as much, and thanked +my agent cordially, and told him to take his umbrella and try the thing +right away, and wave his hat when he got down, if he struck in a soft +place, and then I would ship the rest right along. + +Harris was greatly touched with this mark of confidence, and said so, +in a voice that had a perceptible tremble in it; but at the same time he +said he did not feel himself worthy of so conspicuous a favor; that it +might cause jealousy in the command, for there were plenty who would not +hesitate to say he had used underhanded means to get the appointment, +whereas his conscience would bear him witness that he had not sought it +at all, nor even, in his secret heart, desired it. + +I said these words did him extreme credit, but that he must not throw +away the imperishable distinction of being the first man to descend +an Alp per parachute, simply to save the feelings of some envious +underlings. No, I said, he MUST accept the appointment--it was no longer +an invitation, it was a command. + +He thanked me with effusion, and said that putting the thing in this +form removed every objection. He retired, and soon returned with his +umbrella, his eye flaming with gratitude and his cheeks pallid with joy. +Just then the head guide passed along. Harris's expression changed to +one of infinite tenderness, and he said: + +"That man did me a cruel injury four days ago, and I said in my heart +he should live to perceive and confess that the only noble revenge a +man can take upon his enemy is to return good for evil. I resign in his +favor. Appoint him." + +I threw my arms around the generous fellow and said: + +"Harris, you are the noblest soul that lives. You shall not regret this +sublime act, neither shall the world fail to know of it. You shall have +opportunity far transcending this one, too, if I live--remember that." + +I called the head guide to me and appointed him on the spot. But the +thing aroused no enthusiasm in him. He did not take to the idea at all. + +He said: + +"Tie myself to an umbrella and jump over the Gorner Grat! Excuse me, +there are a great many pleasanter roads to the devil than that." + + + +Upon a discussion of the subject with him, it appeared that he +considered the project distinctly and decidedly dangerous. I was not +convinced, yet I was not willing to try the experiment in any risky +way--that is, in a way that might cripple the strength and efficiency +of the Expedition. I was about at my wits' end when it occurred to me to +try it on the Latinist. + +He was called in. But he declined, on the plea of inexperience, +diffidence in public, lack of curiosity, and I didn't know what all. +Another man declined on account of a cold in the head; thought he +ought to avoid exposure. Another could not jump well--never COULD jump +well--did not believe he could jump so far without long and patient +practice. Another was afraid it was going to rain, and his umbrella had +a hole in it. Everybody had an excuse. The result was what the reader +has by this time guessed: the most magnificent idea that was ever +conceived had to be abandoned, from sheer lack of a person with +enterprise enough to carry it out. Yes, I actually had to give that +thing up--while doubtless I should live to see somebody use it and take +all the credit from me. + +Well, I had to go overland--there was no other way. I marched the +Expedition down the steep and tedious mule-path and took up as good a +position as I could upon the middle of the glacier--because Baedeker +said the middle part travels the fastest. As a measure of economy, +however, I put some of the heavier baggage on the shoreward parts, to go +as slow freight. + +I waited and waited, but the glacier did not move. Night was coming on, +the darkness began to gather--still we did not budge. It occurred to me +then, that there might be a time-table in Baedeker; it would be well to +find out the hours of starting. I called for the book--it could not be +found. Bradshaw would certainly contain a time-table; but no Bradshaw +could be found. + +Very well, I must make the best of the situation. So I pitched the +tents, picketed the animals, milked the cows, had supper, paregoricked +the men, established the watch, and went to bed--with orders to call me +as soon as we came in sight of Zermatt. + +I awoke about half past ten next morning, and looked around. We hadn't +budged a peg! At first I could not understand it; then it occurred to me +that the old thing must be aground. So I cut down some trees and rigged +a spar on the starboard and another on the port side, and fooled away +upward of three hours trying to spar her off. But it was no use. She +was half a mile wide and fifteen or twenty miles long, and there was +no telling just whereabouts she WAS aground. The men began to show +uneasiness, too, and presently they came flying to me with ashy faces, +saying she had sprung a leak. + + + +Nothing but my cool behavior at this critical time saved us from another +panic. I ordered them to show me the place. They led me to a spot where +a huge boulder lay in a deep pool of clear and brilliant water. It did +look like a pretty bad leak, but I kept that to myself. I made a pump +and set the men to work to pump out the glacier. We made a success of +it. I perceived, then, that it was not a leak at all. This boulder had +descended from a precipice and stopped on the ice in the middle of the +glacier, and the sun had warmed it up, every day, and consequently it +had melted its way deeper and deeper into the ice, until at last it +reposed, as we had found it, in a deep pool of the clearest and coldest +water. + +Presently Baedeker was found again, and I hunted eagerly for the +time-table. There was none. The book simply said the glacier was moving +all the time. This was satisfactory, so I shut up the book and chose a +good position to view the scenery as we passed along. I stood there some +time enjoying the trip, but at last it occurred to me that we did +not seem to be gaining any on the scenery. I said to myself, "This +confounded old thing's aground again, sure,"--and opened Baedeker to +see if I could run across any remedy for these annoying interruptions. +I soon found a sentence which threw a dazzling light upon the matter. +It said, "The Gorner Glacier travels at an average rate of a little less +than an inch a day." I have seldom felt so outraged. I have seldom had +my confidence so wantonly betrayed. I made a small calculation: One inch +a day, say thirty feet a year; estimated distance to Zermatt, three and +one-eighteenth miles. Time required to go by glacier, A LITTLE OVER FIVE +HUNDRED YEARS! I said to myself, "I can WALK it quicker--and before I +will patronize such a fraud as this, I will do it." + +When I revealed to Harris the fact that the passenger part of this +glacier--the central part--the lightning-express part, so to speak--was +not due in Zermatt till the summer of 2378, and that the baggage, coming +along the slow edge, would not arrive until some generations later, he +burst out with: + +"That is European management, all over! An inch a day--think of that! +Five hundred years to go a trifle over three miles! But I am not a bit +surprised. It's a Catholic glacier. You can tell by the look of it. And +the management." + +I said, no, I believed nothing but the extreme end of it was in a +Catholic canton. + +"Well, then, it's a government glacier," said Harris. "It's all the +same. Over here the government runs everything--so everything's slow; +slow, and ill-managed. But with us, everything's done by private +enterprise--and then there ain't much lolling around, you can depend +on it. I wish Tom Scott could get his hands on this torpid old slab +once--you'd see it take a different gait from this." + +I said I was sure he would increase the speed, if there was trade enough +to justify it. + +"He'd MAKE trade," said Harris. "That's the difference between +governments and individuals. Governments don't care, individuals do. Tom +Scott would take all the trade; in two years Gorner stock would go to +two hundred, and inside of two more you would see all the other glaciers +under the hammer for taxes." After a reflective pause, Harris added, "A +little less than an inch a day; a little less than an INCH, mind you. +Well, I'm losing my reverence for glaciers." + +I was feeling much the same way myself. I have traveled by canal-boat, +ox-wagon, raft, and by the Ephesus and Smyrna railway; but when it comes +down to good solid honest slow motion, I bet my money on the glacier. As +a means of passenger transportation, I consider the glacier a failure; +but as a vehicle of slow freight, I think she fills the bill. In the +matter of putting the fine shades on that line of business, I judge she +could teach the Germans something. + +I ordered the men to break camp and prepare for the land journey to +Zermatt. At this moment a most interesting find was made; a dark object, +bedded in the glacial ice, was cut out with the ice-axes, and it proved +to be a piece of the undressed skin of some animal--a hair trunk, +perhaps; but a close inspection disabled the hair-trunk theory, and +further discussion and examination exploded it entirely--that is, in the +opinion of all the scientists except the one who had advanced it. This +one clung to his theory with affectionate fidelity characteristic of +originators of scientific theories, and afterward won many of the first +scientists of the age to his view, by a very able pamphlet which he +wrote, entitled, "Evidences going to show that the hair trunk, in a wild +state, belonged to the early glacial period, and roamed the wastes of +chaos in the company with the cave-bear, primeval man, and the other +Ooelitics of the Old Silurian family." + + + +Each of our scientists had a theory of his own, and put forward +an animal of his own as a candidate for the skin. I sided with the +geologist of the Expedition in the belief that this patch of skin had +once helped to cover a Siberian elephant, in some old forgotten age--but +we divided there, the geologist believing that this discovery proved +that Siberia had formerly been located where Switzerland is now, whereas +I held the opinion that it merely proved that the primeval Swiss was not +the dull savage he is represented to have been, but was a being of high +intellectual development, who liked to go to the menagerie. + +We arrived that evening, after many hardships and adventures, in some +fields close to the great ice-arch where the mad Visp boils and surges +out from under the foot of the great Gorner Glacier, and here we camped, +our perils over and our magnificent undertaking successfully completed. +We marched into Zermatt the next day, and were received with the +most lavish honors and applause. A document, signed and sealed by the +authorities, was given to me which established and endorsed the fact +that I had made the ascent of the Riffelberg. This I wear around my +neck, and it will be buried with me when I am no more. + + + +CHAPTER XL + +[Piteous Relics at Chamonix] + + +I am not so ignorant about glacial movement, now, as I was when I took +passage on the Gorner Glacier. I have "read up" since. I am aware that +these vast bodies of ice do not travel at the same rate of speed; while +the Gorner Glacier makes less than an inch a day, the Unter-Aar Glacier +makes as much as eight; and still other glaciers are said to go twelve, +sixteen, and even twenty inches a day. One writer says that the slowest +glacier travels twenty-five feet a year, and the fastest four hundred. + +What is a glacier? It is easy to say it looks like a frozen river which +occupies the bed of a winding gorge or gully between mountains. But that +gives no notion of its vastness. For it is sometimes six hundred feet +thick, and we are not accustomed to rivers six hundred feet deep; no, +our rivers are six feet, twenty feet, and sometimes fifty feet deep; we +are not quite able to grasp so large a fact as an ice-river six hundred +feet deep. + +The glacier's surface is not smooth and level, but has deep swales and +swelling elevations, and sometimes has the look of a tossing sea whose +turbulent billows were frozen hard in the instant of their most violent +motion; the glacier's surface is not a flawless mass, but is a river +with cracks or crevices, some narrow, some gaping wide. Many a man, the +victim of a slip or a misstep, has plunged down one of these and met his +death. Men have been fished out of them alive; but it was when they +did not go to a great depth; the cold of the great depths would quickly +stupefy a man, whether he was hurt or unhurt. These cracks do not go +straight down; one can seldom see more than twenty to forty feet down +them; consequently men who have disappeared in them have been sought +for, in the hope that they had stopped within helping distance, whereas +their case, in most instances, had really been hopeless from the +beginning. + +In 1864 a party of tourists was descending Mont Blanc, and while picking +their way over one of the mighty glaciers of that lofty region, roped +together, as was proper, a young porter disengaged himself from the line +and started across an ice-bridge which spanned a crevice. It broke under +him with a crash, and he disappeared. The others could not see how deep +he had gone, so it might be worthwhile to try and rescue him. A brave +young guide named Michel Payot volunteered. + +Two ropes were made fast to his leather belt and he bore the end of a +third one in his hand to tie to the victim in case he found him. He was +lowered into the crevice, he descended deeper and deeper between the +clear blue walls of solid ice, he approached a bend in the crack and +disappeared under it. Down, and still down, he went, into this profound +grave; when he had reached a depth of eighty feet he passed under +another bend in the crack, and thence descended eighty feet lower, as +between perpendicular precipices. Arrived at this stage of one hundred +and sixty feet below the surface of the glacier, he peered through the +twilight dimness and perceived that the chasm took another turn and +stretched away at a steep slant to unknown deeps, for its course was +lost in darkness. What a place that was to be in--especially if that +leather belt should break! The compression of the belt threatened to +suffocate the intrepid fellow; he called to his friends to draw him up, +but could not make them hear. They still lowered him, deeper and deeper. +Then he jerked his third cord as vigorously as he could; his friends +understood, and dragged him out of those icy jaws of death. + +Then they attached a bottle to a cord and sent it down two hundred feet, +but it found no bottom. It came up covered with congelations--evidence +enough that even if the poor porter reached the bottom with unbroken +bones, a swift death from cold was sure, anyway. + +A glacier is a stupendous, ever-progressing, resistless plow. It pushes +ahead of it masses of boulders which are packed together, and they +stretch across the gorge, right in front of it, like a long grave or a +long, sharp roof. This is called a moraine. It also shoves out a moraine +along each side of its course. + + + +Imposing as the modern glaciers are, they are not so huge as were some +that once existed. For instance, Mr. Whymper says: + +"At some very remote period the Valley of Aosta was occupied by a vast +glacier, which flowed down its entire length from Mont Blanc to the +plain of Piedmont, remained stationary, or nearly so, at its mouth +for many centuries, and deposited there enormous masses of debris. The +length of this glacier exceeded EIGHTY MILES, and it drained a basin +twenty-five to thirty-five miles across, bounded by the highest +mountains in the Alps. + + + +"The great peaks rose several thousand feet above the glaciers, and +then, as now, shattered by sun and frost, poured down their showers of +rocks and stones, in witness of which there are the immense piles of +angular fragments that constitute the moraines of Ivrea. + +"The moraines around Ivrea are of extraordinary dimensions. That which +was on the left bank of the glacier is about THIRTEEN MILES long, and +in some places rises to a height of TWO THOUSAND ONE HUNDRED AND THIRTY +FEET above the floor of the valley! The terminal moraines (those which +are pushed in front of the glaciers) cover something like twenty square +miles of country. At the mouth of the Valley of Aosta, the thickness of +the glacier must have been at least TWO THOUSAND feet, and its width, at +that part, FIVE MILES AND A QUARTER." + + + +It is not easy to get at a comprehension of a mass of ice like that. If +one could cleave off the butt end of such a glacier--an oblong block +two or three miles wide by five and a quarter long and two thousand +feet thick--he could completely hide the city of New York under it, +and Trinity steeple would only stick up into it relatively as far as a +shingle-nail would stick up into the bottom of a Saratoga trunk. + +"The boulders from Mont Blanc, upon the plain below Ivrea, assure us +that the glacier which transported them existed for a prodigious length +of time. Their present distance from the cliffs from which they were +derived is about 420,000 feet, and if we assume that they traveled at +the rate of 400 feet per annum, their journey must have occupied them no +less than 1,055 years! In all probability they did not travel so fast." + + + +Glaciers are sometimes hurried out of their characteristic snail-pace. +A marvelous spectacle is presented then. Mr. Whymper refers to a case +which occurred in Iceland in 1721: + +"It seems that in the neighborhood of the mountain Kotlugja, large +bodies of water formed underneath, or within the glaciers (either on +account of the interior heat of the earth, or from other causes), and at +length acquired irresistible power, tore the glaciers from their mooring +on the land, and swept them over every obstacle into the sea. Prodigious +masses of ice were thus borne for a distance of about ten miles over +land in the space of a few hours; and their bulk was so enormous that +they covered the sea for seven miles from the shore, and remained +aground in six hundred feet of water! The denudation of the land was +upon a grand scale. All superficial accumulations were swept away, and +the bedrock was exposed. It was described, in graphic language, how all +irregularities and depressions were obliterated, and a smooth surface of +several miles' area laid bare, and that this area had the appearance of +having been PLANED BY A PLANE." + +The account translated from the Icelandic says that the mountainlike +ruins of this majestic glacier so covered the sea that as far as the eye +could reach no open water was discoverable, even from the highest peaks. +A monster wall or barrier of ice was built across a considerable stretch +of land, too, by this strange irruption: + +"One can form some idea of the altitude of this barrier of ice when it +is mentioned that from Hofdabrekka farm, which lies high up on a fjeld, +one could not see Hjorleifshofdi opposite, which is a fell six hundred +and forty feet in height; but in order to do so had to clamber up a +mountain slope east of Hofdabrekka twelve hundred feet high." + +These things will help the reader to understand why it is that a man who +keeps company with glaciers comes to feel tolerably insignificant by +and by. The Alps and the glaciers together are able to take every bit of +conceit out of a man and reduce his self-importance to zero if he will +only remain within the influence of their sublime presence long enough +to give it a fair and reasonable chance to do its work. + +The Alpine glaciers move--that is granted, now, by everybody. But there +was a time when people scoffed at the idea; they said you might as well +expect leagues of solid rock to crawl along the ground as expect leagues +of ice to do it. But proof after proof was furnished, and the finally +the world had to believe. + +The wise men not only said the glacier moved, but they timed its +movement. They ciphered out a glacier's gait, and then said confidently +that it would travel just so far in so many years. There is record of +a striking and curious example of the accuracy which may be attained in +these reckonings. + +In 1820 the ascent of Mont Blanc was attempted by a Russian and two +Englishmen, with seven guides. They had reached a prodigious altitude, +and were approaching the summit, when an avalanche swept several of the +party down a sharp slope of two hundred feet and hurled five of them +(all guides) into one of the crevices of a glacier. The life of one +of the five was saved by a long barometer which was strapped to his +back--it bridged the crevice and suspended him until help came. The +alpenstock or baton of another saved its owner in a similar way. Three +men were lost--Pierre Balmat, Pierre Carrier, and Auguste Tairraz. They +had been hurled down into the fathomless great deeps of the crevice. + +Dr. Forbes, the English geologist, had made frequent visits to the Mont +Blanc region, and had given much attention to the disputed question of +the movement of glaciers. During one of these visits he completed his +estimates of the rate of movement of the glacier which had swallowed +up the three guides, and uttered the prediction that the glacier would +deliver up its dead at the foot of the mountain thirty-five years from +the time of the accident, or possibly forty. + +A dull, slow journey--a movement imperceptible to any eye--but it was +proceeding, nevertheless, and without cessation. It was a journey +which a rolling stone would make in a few seconds--the lofty point of +departure was visible from the village below in the valley. + +The prediction cut curiously close to the truth; forty-one years after +the catastrophe, the remains were cast forth at the foot of the glacier. + +I find an interesting account of the matter in the HISTOIRE DU MONT +BLANC, by Stephen d'Arve. I will condense this account, as follows: + +On the 12th of August, 1861, at the hour of the close of mass, a guide +arrived out of breath at the mairie of Chamonix, and bearing on his +shoulders a very lugubrious burden. It was a sack filled with human +remains which he had gathered from the orifice of a crevice in the +Glacier des Bossons. He conjectured that these were remains of the +victims of the catastrophe of 1820, and a minute inquest, immediately +instituted by the local authorities, soon demonstrated the correctness +of his supposition. The contents of the sack were spread upon a long +table, and officially inventoried, as follows: + +Portions of three human skulls. Several tufts of black and blonde hair. +A human jaw, furnished with fine white teeth. A forearm and hand, all +the fingers of the latter intact. The flesh was white and fresh, +and both the arm and hand preserved a degree of flexibility in the +articulations. + +The ring-finger had suffered a slight abrasion, and the stain of the +blood was still visible and unchanged after forty-one years. A left +foot, the flesh white and fresh. + +Along with these fragments were portions of waistcoats, hats, hobnailed +shoes, and other clothing; a wing of a pigeon, with black feathers; a +fragment of an alpenstock; a tin lantern; and lastly, a boiled leg of +mutton, the only flesh among all the remains that exhaled an unpleasant +odor. The guide said that the mutton had no odor when he took it from +the glacier; an hour's exposure to the sun had already begun the work of +decomposition upon it. + +Persons were called for, to identify these poor pathetic relics, and a +touching scene ensued. Two men were still living who had witnessed the +grim catastrophe of nearly half a century before--Marie Couttet (saved +by his baton) and Julien Davouassoux (saved by the barometer). These +aged men entered and approached the table. Davouassoux, more than eighty +years old, contemplated the mournful remains mutely and with a vacant +eye, for his intelligence and his memory were torpid with age; but +Couttet's faculties were still perfect at seventy-two, and he exhibited +strong emotion. He said: + +"Pierre Balmat was fair; he wore a straw hat. This bit of skull, with +the tuft of blond hair, was his; this is his hat. Pierre Carrier was +very dark; this skull was his, and this felt hat. This is Balmat's +hand, I remember it so well!" and the old man bent down and kissed it +reverently, then closed his fingers upon it in an affectionate grasp, +crying out, "I could never have dared to believe that before quitting +this world it would be granted me to press once more the hand of one of +those brave comrades, the hand of my good friend Balmat." + + + +There is something weirdly pathetic about the picture of that +white-haired veteran greeting with his loving handshake this friend +who had been dead forty years. When these hands had met last, they were +alike in the softness and freshness of youth; now, one was brown and +wrinkled and horny with age, while the other was still as young and fair +and blemishless as if those forty years had come and gone in a single +moment, leaving no mark of their passage. Time had gone on, in the one +case; it had stood still in the other. A man who has not seen a friend +for a generation, keeps him in mind always as he saw him last, and is +somehow surprised, and is also shocked, to see the aging change the +years have wrought when he sees him again. Marie Couttet's experience, +in finding his friend's hand unaltered from the image of it which he +had carried in his memory for forty years, is an experience which stands +alone in the history of man, perhaps. + +Couttet identified other relics: + +"This hat belonged to Auguste Tairraz. He carried the cage of pigeons +which we proposed to set free upon the summit. Here is the wing of one +of those pigeons. And here is the fragment of my broken baton; it was by +grace of that baton that my life was saved. Who could have told me that +I should one day have the satisfaction to look again upon this bit of +wood that supported me above the grave that swallowed up my unfortunate +companions!" + +No portions of the body of Tairraz, other than a piece of the skull, +had been found. A diligent search was made, but without result. However, +another search was instituted a year later, and this had better success. +Many fragments of clothing which had belonged to the lost guides were +discovered; also, part of a lantern, and a green veil with blood-stains +on it. But the interesting feature was this: + +One of the searchers came suddenly upon a sleeved arm projecting from +a crevice in the ice-wall, with the hand outstretched as if offering +greeting! "The nails of this white hand were still rosy, and the pose +of the extended fingers seemed to express an eloquent welcome to the +long-lost light of day." + +The hand and arm were alone; there was no trunk. After being removed +from the ice the flesh-tints quickly faded out and the rosy nails took +on the alabaster hue of death. This was the third RIGHT hand found; +therefore, all three of the lost men were accounted for, beyond cavil or +question. + +Dr. Hamel was the Russian gentleman of the party which made the ascent +at the time of the famous disaster. He left Chamonix as soon as he +conveniently could after the descent; and as he had shown a chilly +indifference about the calamity, and offered neither sympathy nor +assistance to the widows and orphans, he carried with him the cordial +execrations of the whole community. Four months before the first remains +were found, a Chamonix guide named Balmat--a relative of one of the lost +men--was in London, and one day encountered a hale old gentleman in the +British Museum, who said: + +"I overheard your name. Are you from Chamonix, Monsieur Balmat?" + +"Yes, sir." + +"Haven't they found the bodies of my three guides, yet? I am Dr. Hamel." + +"Alas, no, monsieur." + +"Well, you'll find them, sooner or later." + +"Yes, it is the opinion of Dr. Forbes and Mr. Tyndall, that the glacier +will sooner or later restore to us the remains of the unfortunate +victims." + +"Without a doubt, without a doubt. And it will be a great thing for +Chamonix, in the matter of attracting tourists. You can get up a museum +with those remains that will draw!" + +This savage idea has not improved the odor of Dr. Hamel's name in +Chamonix by any means. But after all, the man was sound on human nature. +His idea was conveyed to the public officials of Chamonix, and they +gravely discussed it around the official council-table. They were only +prevented from carrying it into execution by the determined opposition +of the friends and descendants of the lost guides, who insisted on +giving the remains Christian burial, and succeeded in their purpose. + +A close watch had to be kept upon all the poor remnants and fragments, +to prevent embezzlement. A few accessory odds and ends were sold. Rags +and scraps of the coarse clothing were parted with at the rate equal to +about twenty dollars a yard; a piece of a lantern and one or two other +trifles brought nearly their weight in gold; and an Englishman offered a +pound sterling for a single breeches-button. + + + +CHAPTER XLI + +[The Fearful Disaster of 1865] + + +One of the most memorable of all the Alpine catastrophes was that of +July, 1865, on the Matterhorn--already slightly referred to, a few +pages back. The details of it are scarcely known in America. To the vast +majority of readers they are not known at all. Mr. Whymper's account is +the only authentic one. I will import the chief portion of it into this +book, partly because of its intrinsic interest, and partly because it +gives such a vivid idea of what the perilous pastime of Alp-climbing +is. This was Mr. Whymper's NINTH attempt during a series of years, to +vanquish that steep and stubborn pillar or rock; it succeeded, the other +eight were failures. No man had ever accomplished the ascent before, +though the attempts had been numerous. + +MR. WHYMPER'S NARRATIVE We started from Zermatt on the 13th of July, at +half past five, on a brilliant and perfectly cloudless morning. We were +eight in number--Croz (guide), old Peter Taugwalder (guide) and his +two sons; Lord F. Douglas, Mr. Hadow, Rev. Mr. Hudson, and I. To insure +steady motion, one tourist and one native walked together. The youngest +Taugwalder fell to my share. The wine-bags also fell to my lot to carry, +and throughout the day, after each drink, I replenished them secretly +with water, so that at the next halt they were found fuller than before! +This was considered a good omen, and little short of miraculous. + +On the first day we did not intend to ascend to any great height, and we +mounted, accordingly, very leisurely. Before twelve o'clock we had found +a good position for the tent, at a height of eleven thousand feet. We +passed the remaining hours of daylight--some basking in the sunshine, +some sketching, some collecting; Hudson made tea, I coffee, and at +length we retired, each one to his blanket bag. + +We assembled together before dawn on the 14th and started directly +it was light enough to move. One of the young Taugwalders returned to +Zermatt. In a few minutes we turned the rib which had intercepted the +view of the eastern face from our tent platform. The whole of this +great slope was now revealed, rising for three thousand feet like a huge +natural staircase. Some parts were more, and others were less easy, but +we were not once brought to a halt by any serious impediment, for when +an obstruction was met in front it could always be turned to the right +or to the left. For the greater part of the way there was no occasion, +indeed, for the rope, and sometimes Hudson led, sometimes myself. At +six-twenty we had attained a height of twelve thousand eight hundred +feet, and halted for half an hour; we then continued the ascent without +a break until nine-fifty-five, when we stopped for fifty minutes, at a +height of fourteen thousand feet. + + + +We had now arrived at the foot of that part which, seen from the +Riffelberg, seems perpendicular or overhanging. We could no longer +continue on the eastern side. For a little distance we ascended by snow +upon the ARETE--that is, the ridge--then turned over to the right, or +northern side. The work became difficult, and required caution. In some +places there was little to hold; the general slope of the mountain was +LESS than forty degrees, and snow had accumulated in, and had filled +up, the interstices of the rock-face, leaving only occasional fragments +projecting here and there. These were at times covered with a thin film +of ice. It was a place which any fair mountaineer might pass in safety. +We bore away nearly horizontally for about four hundred feet, then +ascended directly toward the summit for about sixty feet, then doubled +back to the ridge which descends toward Zermatt. A long stride round +a rather awkward corner brought us to snow once more. That last doubt +vanished! The Matterhorn was ours! Nothing but two hundred feet of easy +snow remained to be surmounted. + +The higher we rose, the more intense became the excitement. The slope +eased off, at length we could be detached, and Croz and I, dashed away, +ran a neck-and-neck race, which ended in a dead heat. At 1:40 P.M., the +world was at our feet, and the Matterhorn was conquered! + + + +The others arrived. Croz now took the tent-pole, and planted it in the +highest snow. "Yes," we said, "there is the flag-staff, but where is the +flag?" "Here it is," he answered, pulling off his blouse and fixing it +to the stick. It made a poor flag, and there was no wind to float +it out, yet it was seen all around. They saw it at Zermatt--at the +Riffel--in the Val Tournanche... . + +We remained on the summit for one hour-- + +One crowded hour of glorious life. + +It passed away too quickly, and we began to prepare for the descent. + +Hudson and I consulted as to the best and safest arrangement of the +party. We agreed that it was best for Croz to go first, and Hadow +second; Hudson, who was almost equal to a guide in sureness of foot, +wished to be third; Lord Douglas was placed next, and old Peter, the +strongest of the remainder, after him. I suggested to Hudson that we +should attach a rope to the rocks on our arrival at the difficult bit, +and hold it as we descended, as an additional protection. He approved +the idea, but it was not definitely decided that it should be done. The +party was being arranged in the above order while I was sketching the +summit, and they had finished, and were waiting for me to be tied in +line, when some one remembered that our names had not been left in a +bottle. They requested me to write them down, and moved off while it was +being done. + +A few minutes afterward I tied myself to young Peter, ran down after the +others, and caught them just as they were commencing the descent of the +difficult part. Great care was being taken. Only one man was moving at a +time; when he was firmly planted the next advanced, and so on. They had +not, however, attached the additional rope to rocks, and nothing was +said about it. The suggestion was not made for my own sake, and I am not +sure that it ever occurred to me again. For some little distance we two +followed the others, detached from them, and should have continued so +had not Lord Douglas asked me, about 3 P.M., to tie on to old Peter, as +he feared, he said, that Taugwalder would not be able to hold his ground +if a slip occurred. + +A few minutes later, a sharp-eyed lad ran into the Monte Rosa Hotel, at +Zermatt, saying that he had seen an avalanche fall from the summit of +the Matterhorn onto the Matterhorn glacier. The boy was reproved for +telling idle stories; he was right, nevertheless, and this was what he +saw. + +Michel Croz had laid aside his ax, and in order to give Mr. Hadow +greater security, was absolutely taking hold of his legs, and putting +his feet, one by one, into their proper positions. As far as I know, no +one was actually descending. I cannot speak with certainty, because the +two leading men were partially hidden from my sight by an intervening +mass of rock, but it is my belief, from the movements of their +shoulders, that Croz, having done as I said, was in the act of turning +round to go down a step or two himself; at this moment Mr. Hadow +slipped, fell against him, and knocked him over. I heard one startled +exclamation from Croz, then saw him and Mr. Hadow flying downward; +in another moment Hudson was dragged from his steps, and Lord Douglas +immediately after him. All this was the work of a moment. Immediately we +heard Croz's exclamation, old Peter and I planted ourselves as firmly as +the rocks would permit; the rope was taut between us, and the jerk came +on us both as on one man. We held; but the rope broke midway between +Taugwalder and Lord Francis Douglas. For a few seconds we saw our +unfortunate companions sliding downward on their backs, and spreading +out their hands, endeavoring to save themselves. They passed from our +sight uninjured, disappeared one by one, and fell from the precipice to +precipice onto the Matterhorn glacier below, a distance of nearly +four thousand feet in height. From the moment the rope broke it was +impossible to help them. So perished our comrades! + + + +For more than two hours afterward I thought almost every moment that the +next would be my last; for the Taugwalders, utterly unnerved, were not +only incapable of giving assistance, but were in such a state that a +slip might have been expected from them at any moment. After a time we +were able to do that which should have been done at first, and fixed +rope to firm rocks, in addition to being tied together. These ropes were +cut from time to time, and were left behind. Even with their assurance +the men were afraid to proceed, and several times old Peter turned, +with ashy face and faltering limbs, and said, with terrible emphasis, "I +CANNOT!" + +About 6 P.M., we arrived at the snow upon the ridge descending toward +Zermatt, and all peril was over. We frequently looked, but in vain, for +traces of our unfortunate companions; we bent over the ridge and cried +to them, but no sound returned. Convinced at last that they were neither +within sight nor hearing, we ceased from our useless efforts; and, too +cast down for speech, silently gathered up our things, and the little +effects of those who were lost, and then completed the descent. Such +is Mr. Whymper's graphic and thrilling narrative. Zermatt gossip +darkly hints that the elder Taugwalder cut the rope, when the accident +occurred, in order to preserve himself from being dragged into the +abyss; but Mr. Whymper says that the ends of the rope showed no evidence +of cutting, but only of breaking. He adds that if Taugwalder had had the +disposition to cut the rope, he would not have had time to do it, the +accident was so sudden and unexpected. + +Lord Douglas' body has never been found. It probably lodged upon some +inaccessible shelf in the face of the mighty precipice. Lord Douglas was +a youth of nineteen. The three other victims fell nearly four thousand +feet, and their bodies lay together upon the glacier when found by +Mr. Whymper and the other searchers the next morning. Their graves are +beside the little church in Zermatt. + + + +CHAPTER XLII + +[Chillon has a Nice, Roomy Dungeon] + + +Switzerland is simply a large, humpy, solid rock, with a thin skin of +grass stretched over it. Consequently, they do not dig graves, they +blast them out with powder and fuse. They cannot afford to have large +graveyards, the grass skin is too circumscribed and too valuable. It is +all required for the support of the living. + +The graveyard in Zermatt occupies only about one-eighth of an acre. +The graves are sunk in the living rock, and are very permanent; but +occupation of them is only temporary; the occupant can only stay till +his grave is needed by a later subject, he is removed, then, for they do +not bury one body on top of another. As I understand it, a family owns +a grave, just as it owns a house. A man dies and leaves his house to his +son--and at the same time, this dead father succeeds to his own father's +grave. He moves out of the house and into the grave, and his predecessor +moves out of the grave and into the cellar of the chapel. I saw a black +box lying in the churchyard, with skull and cross-bones painted on it, +and was told that this was used in transferring remains to the cellar. + +In that cellar the bones and skulls of several hundred of former +citizens were compactly corded up. They made a pile eighteen feet long, +seven feet high, and eight feet wide. I was told that in some of the +receptacles of this kind in the Swiss villages, the skulls were all +marked, and if a man wished to find the skulls of his ancestors for +several generations back, he could do it by these marks, preserved in +the family records. + + + +An English gentleman who had lived some years in this region, said it +was the cradle of compulsory education. But he said that the English +idea that compulsory education would reduce bastardy and intemperance +was an error--it has not that effect. He said there was more seduction +in the Protestant than in the Catholic cantons, because the confessional +protected the girls. I wonder why it doesn't protect married women in +France and Spain? + +This gentleman said that among the poorer peasants in the Valais, it was +common for the brothers in a family to cast lots to determine which +of them should have the coveted privilege of marrying, and his +brethren--doomed bachelors--heroically banded themselves together to +help support the new family. + +We left Zermatt in a wagon--and in a rain-storm, too--for St. Nicholas +about ten o'clock one morning. Again we passed between those grass-clad +prodigious cliffs, specked with wee dwellings peeping over at us from +velvety green walls ten and twelve hundred feet high. It did not seem +possible that the imaginary chamois even could climb those precipices. +Lovers on opposite cliffs probably kiss through a spy-glass, and +correspond with a rifle. + +In Switzerland the farmer's plow is a wide shovel, which scrapes up and +turns over the thin earthy skin of his native rock--and there the man of +the plow is a hero. Now here, by our St. Nicholas road, was a grave, and +it had a tragic story. A plowman was skinning his farm one morning--not +the steepest part of it, but still a steep part--that is, he was not +skinning the front of his farm, but the roof of it, near the eaves--when +he absent-mindedly let go of the plow-handles to moisten his hands, in +the usual way; he lost his balance and fell out of his farm backward; +poor fellow, he never touched anything till he struck bottom, fifteen +hundred feet below. [This was on a Sunday.--M.T.] We throw a halo of +heroism around the life of the soldier and the sailor, because of the +deadly dangers they are facing all the time. But we are not used to +looking upon farming as a heroic occupation. This is because we have not +lived in Switzerland. + + + +From St. Nicholas we struck out for Visp--or Vispach--on foot. The +rain-storms had been at work during several days, and had done a deal of +damage in Switzerland and Savoy. We came to one place where a stream had +changed its course and plunged down a mountain in a new place, sweeping +everything before it. Two poor but precious farms by the roadside were +ruined. One was washed clear away, and the bed-rock exposed; the other +was buried out of sight under a tumbled chaos of rocks, gravel, mud, +and rubbish. The resistless might of water was well exemplified. Some +saplings which had stood in the way were bent to the ground, stripped +clean of their bark, and buried under rocky debris. The road had been +swept away, too. + +In another place, where the road was high up on the mountain's face, and +its outside edge protected by flimsy masonry, we frequently came across +spots where this masonry had carved off and left dangerous gaps for +mules to get over; and with still more frequency we found the masonry +slightly crumbled, and marked by mule-hoofs, thus showing that there had +been danger of an accident to somebody. When at last we came to a +badly ruptured bit of masonry, with hoof-prints evidencing a desperate +struggle to regain the lost foothold, I looked quite hopefully over the +dizzy precipice. But there was nobody down there. + +They take exceedingly good care of their rivers in Switzerland and other +portions of Europe. They wall up both banks with slanting solid stone +masonry--so that from end to end of these rivers the banks look like the +wharves at St. Louis and other towns on the Mississippi River. + +It was during this walk from St. Nicholas, in the shadow of the majestic +Alps, that we came across some little children amusing themselves in +what seemed, at first, a most odd and original way--but it wasn't; it +was in simply a natural and characteristic way. They were roped together +with a string, they had mimic alpenstocks and ice-axes, and were +climbing a meek and lowly manure-pile with a most blood-curdling amount +of care and caution. The "guide" at the head of the line cut imaginary +steps, in a laborious and painstaking way, and not a monkey budged till +the step above was vacated. If we had waited we should have witnessed an +imaginary accident, no doubt; and we should have heard the intrepid band +hurrah when they made the summit and looked around upon the "magnificent +view," and seen them throw themselves down in exhausted attitudes for a +rest in that commanding situation. + + + +In Nevada I used to see the children play at silver-mining. Of course, +the great thing was an accident in a mine, and there were two "star" +parts; that of the man who fell down the mimic shaft, and that of the +daring hero who was lowered into the depths to bring him up. I knew one +small chap who always insisted on playing BOTH of these parts--and he +carried his point. He would tumble into the shaft and die, and then come +to the surface and go back after his own remains. + +It is the smartest boy that gets the hero part everywhere; he is head +guide in Switzerland, head miner in Nevada, head bull-fighter in Spain, +etc.; but I knew a preacher's son, seven years old, who once selected +a part for himself compared to which those just mentioned are tame +and unimpressive. Jimmy's father stopped him from driving imaginary +horse-cars one Sunday--stopped him from playing captain of an imaginary +steamboat next Sunday--stopped him from leading an imaginary army to +battle the following Sunday--and so on. Finally the little fellow said: + +"I've tried everything, and they won't any of them do. What CAN I play?" + +"I hardly know, Jimmy; but you MUST play only things that are suitable +to the Sabbath-day." + +Next Sunday the preacher stepped softly to a back-room door to see if +the children were rightly employed. He peeped in. A chair occupied the +middle of the room, and on the back of it hung Jimmy's cap; one of +his little sisters took the cap down, nibbled at it, then passed it to +another small sister and said, "Eat of this fruit, for it is good." The +Reverend took in the situation--alas, they were playing the Expulsion +from Eden! Yet he found one little crumb of comfort. He said to himself, +"For once Jimmy has yielded the chief role--I have been wronging him, I +did not believe there was so much modesty in him; I should have expected +him to be either Adam or Eve." This crumb of comfort lasted but a very +little while; he glanced around and discovered Jimmy standing in an +imposing attitude in a corner, with a dark and deadly frown on his face. +What that meant was very plain--HE WAS IMPERSONATING THE DEITY! Think of +the guileless sublimity of that idea. + + + +We reached Vispach at 8 P.M., only about seven hours out from St. +Nicholas. So we must have made fully a mile and a half an hour, and it +was all downhill, too, and very muddy at that. We stayed all night at +the Hotel de Soleil; I remember it because the landlady, the portier, +the waitress, and the chambermaid were not separate persons, but were +all contained in one neat and chipper suit of spotless muslin, and she +was the prettiest young creature I saw in all that region. She was the +landlord's daughter. And I remember that the only native match to her +I saw in all Europe was the young daughter of the landlord of a village +inn in the Black Forest. Why don't more people in Europe marry and keep +hotel? + + + +Next morning we left with a family of English friends and went by train +to Brevet, and thence by boat across the lake to Ouchy (Lausanne). + +Ouchy is memorable to me, not on account of its beautiful situation and +lovely surroundings--although these would make it stick long in one's +memory--but as the place where _I_ caught the London TIMES dropping into +humor. It was NOT aware of it, though. It did not do it on purpose. +An English friend called my attention to this lapse, and cut out the +reprehensible paragraph for me. Think of encountering a grin like this +on the face of that grim journal: + +ERRATUM.--We are requested by Reuter's Telegram Company to correct an +erroneous announcement made in their Brisbane telegram of the 2d inst., +published in our impression of the 5th inst., stating that "Lady Kennedy +had given birth to twins, the eldest being a son." The Company explain +that the message they received contained the words "Governor of +Queensland, TWINS FIRST SON." Being, however, subsequently informed that +Sir Arthur Kennedy was unmarried and that there must be some mistake, a +telegraphic repetition was at once demanded. It has been received today +(11th inst.) and shows that the words really telegraphed by Reuter's +agent were "Governor Queensland TURNS FIRST SOD," alluding to the +Maryborough-Gympic Railway in course of construction. The words in +italics were mutilated by the telegraph in transmission from Australia, +and reaching the company in the form mentioned above gave rise to the +mistake. + +I had always had a deep and reverent compassion for the sufferings of +the "prisoner of Chillon," whose story Byron had told in such moving +verse; so I took the steamer and made pilgrimage to the dungeons of the +Castle of Chillon, to see the place where poor Bonnivard endured his +dreary captivity three hundred years ago. I am glad I did that, for it +took away some of the pain I was feeling on the prisoner's account. His +dungeon was a nice, cool, roomy place, and I cannot see why he should +have been dissatisfied with it. If he had been imprisoned in a St. +Nicholas private dwelling, where the fertilizer prevails, and the goat +sleeps with the guest, and the chickens roost on him and the cow comes +in and bothers him when he wants to muse, it would have been another +matter altogether; but he surely could not have had a very cheerless +time of it in that pretty dungeon. It has romantic window-slits that +let in generous bars of light, and it has tall, noble columns, carved +apparently from the living rock; and what is more, they are written +all over with thousands of names; some of them--like Byron's and Victor +Hugo's--of the first celebrity. Why didn't he amuse himself reading +these names? Then there are the couriers and tourists--swarms of them +every day--what was to hinder him from having a good time with them? I +think Bonnivard's sufferings have been overrated. + + + +Next, we took the train and went to Martigny, on the way to Mont Blanc. +Next morning we started, about eight o'clock, on foot. We had plenty of +company, in the way of wagon-loads and mule-loads of tourists--and dust. +This scattering procession of travelers was perhaps a mile long. The +road was uphill--interminable uphill--and tolerably steep. The weather +was blisteringly hot, and the man or woman who had to sit on a creeping +mule, or in a crawling wagon, and broil in the beating sun, was an +object to be pitied. We could dodge among the bushes, and have the +relief of shade, but those people could not. They paid for a conveyance, +and to get their money's worth they rode. + +We went by the way of the Tete Noir, and after we reached high ground +there was no lack of fine scenery. In one place the road was tunneled +through a shoulder of the mountain; from there one looked down into a +gorge with a rushing torrent in it, and on every hand was a charming +view of rocky buttresses and wooded heights. There was a liberal +allowance of pretty waterfalls, too, on the Tete Noir route. + + + +About half an hour before we reached the village of Argentiere a vast +dome of snow with the sun blazing on it drifted into view and framed +itself in a strong V-shaped gateway of the mountains, and we recognized +Mont Blanc, the "monarch of the Alps." With every step, after that, +this stately dome rose higher and higher into the blue sky, and at last +seemed to occupy the zenith. + +Some of Mont Blanc's neighbors--bare, light-brown, steeplelike +rocks--were very peculiarly shaped. Some were whittled to a sharp point, +and slightly bent at the upper end, like a lady's finger; one monster +sugar-loaf resembled a bishop's hat; it was too steep to hold snow on +its sides, but had some in the division. + + + +While we were still on very high ground, and before the descent toward +Argentiere began, we looked up toward a neighboring mountain-top, and +saw exquisite prismatic colors playing about some white clouds which +were so delicate as to almost resemble gossamer webs. The faint pinks +and greens were peculiarly beautiful; none of the colors were deep, they +were the lightest shades. They were bewitching commingled. We sat down +to study and enjoy this singular spectacle. The tints remained during +several minutes--flitting, changing, melting into each other; paling +almost away for a moment, then reflushing--a shifting, restless, +unstable succession of soft opaline gleams, shimmering over that air +film of white cloud, and turning it into a fabric dainty enough to +clothe an angel with. + +By and by we perceived what those super-delicate colors, and their +continuous play and movement, reminded us of; it is what one sees in a +soap-bubble that is drifting along, catching changes of tint from the +objects it passes. A soap-bubble is the most beautiful thing, and the +most exquisite, in nature; that lovely phantom fabric in the sky was +suggestive of a soap-bubble split open, and spread out in the sun. I +wonder how much it would take to buy a soap-bubble, if there was only +one in the world? One could buy a hatful of Koh-i-Noors with the same +money, no doubt. + + + +We made the tramp from Martigny to Argentiere in eight hours. We beat +all the mules and wagons; we didn't usually do that. We hired a sort of +open baggage-wagon for the trip down the valley to Chamonix, and then +devoted an hour to dining. This gave the driver time to get drunk. He +had a friend with him, and this friend also had had time to get drunk. + +When we drove off, the driver said all the tourists had arrived and +gone by while we were at dinner; "but," said he, impressively, "be not +disturbed by that--remain tranquil--give yourselves no uneasiness--their +dust rises far before us--rest you tranquil, leave all to me--I am the +king of drivers. Behold!" + +Down came his whip, and away we clattered. I never had such a shaking up +in my life. The recent flooding rains had washed the road clear away in +places, but we never stopped, we never slowed down for anything. We tore +right along, over rocks, rubbish, gullies, open fields--sometimes with +one or two wheels on the ground, but generally with none. Every now and +then that calm, good-natured madman would bend a majestic look over his +shoulder at us and say, "Ah, you perceive? It is as I have said--I am +the king of drivers." Every time we just missed going to destruction, +he would say, with tranquil happiness, "Enjoy it, gentlemen, it is very +rare, it is very unusual--it is given to few to ride with the king of +drivers--and observe, it is as I have said, I am he." + + + +He spoke in French, and punctuated with hiccoughs. His friend was +French, too, but spoke in German--using the same system of punctuation, +however. The friend called himself the "Captain of Mont Blanc," and +wanted us to make the ascent with him. He said he had made more ascents +than any other man--forty seven--and his brother had made thirty-seven. +His brother was the best guide in the world, except himself--but he, +yes, observe him well--he was the "Captain of Mont Blanc"--that title +belonged to none other. + +The "king" was as good as his word--he overtook that long procession +of tourists and went by it like a hurricane. The result was that we got +choicer rooms at the hotel in Chamonix than we should have done if +his majesty had been a slower artist--or rather, if he hadn't most +providentially got drunk before he left Argentiere. + + + + + +End of Project Gutenberg's A Tramp Abroad, by Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens) + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK A TRAMP ABROAD *** + +***** This file should be named 5787.txt or 5787.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.org/5/7/8/5787/ + +Produced by Anonymous Volunteers, John Greenman and David Widger + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. 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