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Day</title> <link rel=" /> - <style type="text/css" xml:space="preserve"> - - body { margin:15%; background:#faebd0; text-align:justify} - P { text-indent: 1em; margin-top: .25em; margin-bottom: .25em; } - H1,H2,H3,H4,H5,H6 { text-align: center; margin-left: 15%; margin-right: 15%; } - hr { width: 50%; text-align: center;} - .foot { margin-left: 5%; margin-right: 5%; text-align: justify; font-size: 80%; font-style: italic;} - blockquote {font-size: 97%; font-style: italic; margin-left: 10%; margin-right: 10%;} - .mynote {background-color: #DDE; color: #000; padding: .5em; margin-left: 10%; margin-right: 10%; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 95%;} - .toc { margin-left: 10%; margin-bottom: .75em;} - .toc2 { margin-left: 20%;} - .xx-small {font-size: 60%;} - .x-small {font-size: 75%;} - .small {font-size: 85%;} - .large {font-size: 115%;} - .x-large {font-size: 130%;} - .indent5 { margin-left: 5%;} - .indent10 { margin-left: 10%;} - .indent15 { margin-left: 15%;} - .indent20 { margin-left: 20%;} - .indent25 { margin-left: 25%;} - .indent30 { margin-left: 30%;} - .indent35 { margin-left: 35%;} - .indent40 { margin-left: 40%;} - div.fig { display:block; margin:0 auto; text-align:center; } - div.middle { margin-left: 20%; margin-right: 20%; text-align: justify; } - .figleft {float: left; margin-left: 0%; margin-right: 1%;} - .figright {float: right; margin-right: 0%; margin-left: 1%;} - .pagenum {position: absolute; right: 1%; font-size: 0.6em; - font-variant: normal; font-style: normal; - text-align: right; background-color: #FFFACD; - border: 1px solid; padding: 0.3em;text-indent: 0em;} - .side { float: left; font-size: 75%; width: 15%; padding-left: 0.8em; - border-left: dashed thin; text-align: left; - text-indent: 0; font-weight: bold; font-style: italic; - font-weight: bold; color: black; background: #eeeeee; border: solid 1px;} - .head { float: left; font-size: 90%; width: 98%; padding-left: 0.8em; - border-left: dashed thin; text-align: center; - text-indent: 0; font-weight: bold; font-style: italic; - font-weight: bold; color: black; background: #eeeeee; border: solid 1px;} - p.pfirst, p.noindent {text-indent: 0} - span.dropcap { float: left; margin: 0 0.1em 0 0; line-height: 0.8 } - pre { font-style: italic; font-size: 90%; margin-left: 10%;} - -</style> - </head> - <body> - - -<pre> - -The Project Gutenberg EBook of Up In Maine, by Holman F. Day - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most -other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions -whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of -the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at -www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have -to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook. - - - -Title: Up In Maine - Stories of Yankee Life Told in Verse - -Author: Holman F. Day - -Commentator: C. E. Littlefield - -Release Date: August 11, 2017 [EBook #55341] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: UTF-8 - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK UP IN MAINE *** - - - - -Produced by David Widger from page images generously -provided by the Internet Archive - - - - - - -</pre> - - <div style="height: 8em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h1> - UP IN MAINE - </h1> - <h3> - Stories of Yankee Life Told in Verse - </h3> - <h2> - By Holman F. Day - </h2> - <h3> - With an Introduction by C. E. Littlefield - </h3> - <h4> - Boston: Small, Maynard & Company - </h4> - <h3> - 1900 - </h3> - <p> - <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0001" id="linkimage-0001"> </a> - </p> - <div class="fig" style="width:50%;"> - <img src="images/0001.jpg" alt="0001 " width="100%" /><br /> - </div> - <h5> - <a href="images/0001.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a> - </h5> - <p> - <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0002" id="linkimage-0002"> </a> - </p> - <div class="fig" style="width:50%;"> - <img src="images/0010.jpg" alt="0010 " width="100%" /><br /> - </div> - <h5> - <a href="images/0010.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a> - </h5> - <p> - <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0003" id="linkimage-0003"> </a> - </p> - <div class="fig" style="width:50%;"> - <img src="images/0013.jpg" alt="0013 " width="100%" /><br /> - </div> - <h5> - <a href="images/0013.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a> - </h5> -<pre xml:space="preserve"> - TO MY FRIEND - - AND FELLOW IN THE CRAFT OF LETTERS - - WINFIELD M. THOMPSON - - TO WHOM I AM INDEBTED - FOR MORE THAN ONE OF THE STORIES - TOLD HEREIN - - THIS VOLUME IS DEDICATED -</pre> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <p> - <b>CONTENTS</b> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_PREF"> PREFACE </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0002"> 'ROUND HOME </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0003"> AUNT SHAW’S PET JUG </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0004"> OLD BOGGS’S SLARNT </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0005"> CY NYE, PREVARICATOR </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0006"> UNCLE BENJY AND OLD CRANE </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0007"> “PLUG” </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0008"> THE SONG OF THE HARROW AND PLOW </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0009"> HOORAY FOR THE SEASON OF FAIRS </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0010"> HAD A SET OF DOUBLE TEETH </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0011"> GRAMPY’S LULLABY </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0012"> HOSKINS’S COW </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0013"> AN OLD STUN’ WALL </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0014"> THE STOCK IN THE TIE-UP </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0015"> EPHRUM WADE’S STAND-BY IN HAYING </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0016"> RESURRECTION OF EPHRUM WAY </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0017"> LOOK OUT FOR YOUR THUMB </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0018"> THE TRIUMPH OF MODEST MARIA </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0018b"> SON HAS GOT THE DEED </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0019"> AN IDYL OF COLD WEATHER </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0020"> BUSTED THE “TEST YOUR STRENGTH” </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0021"> “WHEN A MAN GETS OLD” </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0022"> I’VE GOT THEM CALVES TO VEAL </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0023"> THE OFF SIDE OF THE COW </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0024"> THE LYRIC OF THE BUCK-SAW </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0025"> MISTER KEAZLE’S EPITAPH </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0026"> PLAIN OLD KITCHEN CHAP </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0027"> TAKIN’ COMFORT </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0028"> EPHRUM KEPT THREE DOGS </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0029"> LAY OF DRIED-APPLE PIE </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0030"> GRAMPY SINGS A SONG </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0031"> UNCLE MICAJAH STROUT </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0032"> THE TRUE STORY OF A KICKER </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0033"> MORAL. </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0034"> ZEK’L PRATT’S HARRYCANE </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0035"> THOSE PICKLES OF MARM’S </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0036"> “THE MAN I KNEW I KILLED” </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0037"> ’LONG SHORE CRUISE OF THE “NANCY P.” - </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0038"> TALE OF THE SEA-FARING MAN </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0039"> CAP’N NUTTER OF THE “PUDDENTAME” - </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0040"> GOOD-BY, LOBSTER </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0041"> CURE FOR HOMESICKNESS </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0042"> ON THE OLD COAST TUB </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0043"> TALE OF THE KENNEBEC MARINER </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0044"> DRIVE, CAMP, AND WANGAN </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0045"> THE LAW ’GAINST SPIKE-SOLE BOOTS </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0046"> THE CHAP THAT SWINGS THE AXE </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0047"> THE SONG OF THE WOODS’ DOG-WATCH </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0048"> FIDDLER CURED THE CAMP </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0049"> THE SONG OF THE SAW </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0050"> DOWN THE TRAIL WITH GUM PACKS </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0051"> REAR O’ THE DRIVE </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0052"> MATIN SONG OF PETE LONG’S COOK </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0053"> OFF FOR THE LUMBER WOODS </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0054"> HERE’S TO THE STOUT ASH POLE </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0055"> MISTER WHAT’S-HIS-NAME OF SEBOOMOOK </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0056"> HA’NTS OF THE KINGDOM OF SPRUCE </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0057"> THE HERO OF THE COONSKIN CAP </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0058"> UP IN MAINE </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0059"> A HAIL TO THE HUNTER </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0060"> HOSSES </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0061"> THEM OLD RAZOOS AT TOPSHAM TRACK </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0062"> TO HIM WHO DRIV THE STAGE </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0063"> HE BACKED A BLAMED OLD HORSE </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0064"> B. BROWN—HOSS ORATOR </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0065"> “JEST A LIFT” </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0066"> BART OF BRIGHTON </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0067"> GOIN’ T’ SCHOOL </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0068"> THE PAIL I LUGGED TO SCHOOL </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0069"> THE PADDYWHACKS </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0070"> THAT MAYBASKET FOR MABEL FRY </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0071"> THE MYSTIC BAND </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#link2H_4_0072"> AT THE OLD “GOOL” </a> - </p> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <p> - <b>List of Illustrations</b> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#linkimage-0001"> 0001 </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#linkimage-0002"> 0010 </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#linkimage-0003"> 0013 </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#linkimage-0004"> 0043 </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#linkimage-0005"> 0129 </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#linkimage-0006"> 0161 </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#linkimage-0007"> 0205 </a> - </p> - <p class="toc"> - <a href="#linkimage-0008"> 0235 </a> - </p> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <br /><br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_PREF" id="link2H_PREF"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - PREFACE - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - I don’t know how to weave a roundelay, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I couldn’t voice a sighing song of love; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - No mellow lyre that on which I play; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I plunk a strident lute without a glove. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The rhythm that is running through my stuff - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Is not the whisp of maiden’s trailing gown; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The metre, maybe, gallops rather rough, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Like river-drivers storming down to town. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —It’s more than likely something from the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - wood, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Where chocking axes scare the deer and - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - moose; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A homely rhyme, and easy understood - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —An echo from the weird domain of Spruce. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Or else it’s just some Yankee notion, dressed - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - In rough-and-ready “Uncle Dudley” phrase; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Some honest thought we common folks suggest, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —Some tricksy mem’ry-flash from boyhood’s - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - days. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I cannot polish off this stilted rhyme - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - With all these homely notions in my brain. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A sonnet, sir, would stick me every time; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Let’s have a chat ’bout common things in - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Maine. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent35"> - Holman F. Day. - </p> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <p> - |A<i>BOUT three thousand years ago the “Preacher” declared - that “of making many books there is no end.” This sublimely - pessimistic truism deserves to be considered in connection with the time - when it was written; otherwise it might accomplish results not intended by - its author. </i> - </p> - <p> - It must be remembered that in the “Preacher’s” time - books were altogether in writing. It should also be borne in mind that if - the handwriting which we have in these days, speaking of the period prior - to the advent of the female typewriter, is to be accepted as any - criterion, —and inasmuch as all concede that history repeats itself, - that may well be assumed,—is easy to understand how, by reason of - its illegibility, he was also led to declare that “much study is a - weariness of the flesh.” It is quite obvious that this was the - moving cause of his delightfully doleful utterance as to books. Had he - lived in this year nineteen hundred, at either the closing of the - nineteenth or the dawning of the twentieth century,—as to whether it - is closing or dawning I make no assertion,—he might well have made - same criticism, but from an optimistic standpoint. - </p> - <p> - A competent litterateur informs me that there are now extant 3,725,423,201 - books; that in America and England alone during the last year 12,888 books - entered upon a precarious existence, with the faint though unexpressed - hope of surviving “life’s fitful fever!” If the - conditions of the “Preacher’s” time obtained to-day, the - vocabulary of pessimism would be inadequate for the expression of similar - views. - </p> - <p> - A careful examination by the writer, of all these well-nigh innumerable - monuments of learning, discloses the fact that the work now being - introduced to what I trust may be an equally innumerable army of readers - has no parallel in literature. If justification were needed, that fact - alone justifies its existence. This fact, however, is not necessary, as - the all-sufficient fact which warrants the collection of these unique - sketches in book form is that no one can read them without being - interested, entertained, and amused, as well as instructed and improved. - “The stubborn strength of Plymouth Rock” is nowhere better - exemplified than on the Maine farm, in the Maine woods, on the Maine - coast, or in the Maine workshop. From them, the author of “Up in - Maine” has drawn his inspiration. Rugged independence, singleness of - purpose, unswerving integrity, philosophy adequate for all occasions, the - great realities of life, and a cheerful disregard of conventionalities, - are here found in all their native strength and vigor. These peculiarities - as delineated may be rough, perhaps uncouth, but they are characteristic, - picturesque, engaging, and lifelike. His subjects are rough diamonds. They - have the inherent qualities from which great characters are developed, and - out of which heroes are made. - </p> - <p> - Through every chink and crevice of these rugged portrayals glitters the - sheen of pure gold, gold of standard weight and fineness, “gold - tried in the fire.” Finally it should be said that this is what is - now known as a book with a purpose, and that purpose, as the author - confidentially informs me, is to sell as many copies as possible, which he - confidently expects to do. To this most worthy end I trust I may have, in - a small degree, contributed by this introduction. - </p> - <h3> - C. LITTLEFIELD. - </h3> - <p> - Washington, D.C., March 17,1900. - </p> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0002" id="link2H_4_0002"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - ‘ROUND HOME - </h2> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0003" id="link2H_4_0003"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - AUNT SHAW’S PET JUG - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Now there was Uncle Elnathan Shaw, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Most regular man you ever saw! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Just half-past four in the afternoon - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He’d start and whistle that old jig tune, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Take the big blue jug from the but’ry shelf - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And trot down cellar, to draw himself - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Old cider enough to last him through - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The winter ev’nin’. Two quarts would do. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Just as regular as half-past four - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Come round, he’d tackle that cellar door, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As he had for thutty years or more. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And as regular, too, as he took that jug - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Aunt Shaw would yap through her old - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - mug, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Now, Nathan, for goodness’ sake take care - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - You allus trip on the second stair; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It seems as though you were just possessed - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To break that jug. It’s the very best - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There is in town and you know it, too, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And ’twas left to me by my great-aunt Sue. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For goodness’ sake, why don’t yer lug - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A tin dish down, for ye’ll break that jug?” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Allus the same, suh, for thirty years, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Allus the same old twits and jeers - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Slammed for the nineteenth thousand time - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And still we wonder, my friend, at crime. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But Nathan took it meek’s a pup - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the worst he said was “Please shut up.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - You know what the Good Book says befell - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The pitcher that went to the old-time well; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Wal, whether ’twas that or his time had come, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Or his stiff old limbs got weak and numb - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Or whether his nerves at last giv’ in - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To Aunt Shaw’s everlasting chin— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - One day he slipped on that second stair, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Whirled round and grabbed at the empty air. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And clean to the foot of them stairs, ker-smack, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He bumped on the bulge of his humped old back - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he’d hardly finished the final bump - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When old Aunt Shaw she giv’ a jump - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And screamed downstairs as mad’s a bug - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Dod-rot your hide, did ye break my jug?” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Poor Uncle Nathan lay there flat - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Knocked in the shape of an old cocked hat, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But he rubbed his legs, brushed off the dirt - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And found after all that he warn’t much hurt. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he’d saved the jug, for his last wild thought - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Had been of that; he might have caught - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - At the cellar shelves and saved his fall, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But he kept his hands on the jug through all. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And now as he loosed his jealous hug - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - His wife just screamed, “Did ye break my - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - jug?” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Not a single word for his poor old bones - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Nor a word when she heard his awful groans, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But the blamed old hard-shelled turkle just - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Wanted to know if that jug was bust. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Old Uncle Nathan he let one roar - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he shook his fist at the cellar door; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Did ye break my jug?” she was yellin’ still. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “No, durn yer pelt, but I swow I will.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And you’d thought that the house was a-going - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - to fall - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When the old jug smashed on the cellar wall. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0004" id="link2H_4_0004"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - OLD BOGGS’S SLARNT - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Old Bill Boggs is always sayin’ that he’d like to - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - but he carn’t; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He hain’t never had no chances, he hain’t never - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - got no slarnt. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Says it’s all dum foolish tryin’, ’less ye git the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - proper start, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Says he’s never seed no op’nin’ so he’s never - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - had no heart. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But he’s chawed enough tobacker for to fill a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - hogset up - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And has spent his time a-trainin’ some all-fired - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - kind of pup; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - While his wife has took in washin’ and his chil- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - dren hain’t been larnt - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Cause old Boggs is allus whinin’ that he’s never - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - got no slarnt. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Them air young uns round the gros’ry hadn’t - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - oughter done the thing! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Now it’s done, though, and it’s over, ’twas a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - cracker-jack, by jing. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Boggs, ye see, has been a-settin’ twenty years on - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - one old plank, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - One end h’isted on a saw hoss, t’other on the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - cistern tank. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - T’other night he was a-chawin’ and he says, “I - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - vum-spt-ooo— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Here I am a-owin’ money—not a gol durn thing - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - to do! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Tain’t no use er backin’ chances, ner er fightin’ - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - back at Luck, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Less ye have some way er startin’, feller’s - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sartin to be stuck. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Needs a slarnt to git yer going”—then them - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - young uns give a carnt, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Plank went up an’ down old Boggs went— - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - yas, he got it, got his slarnt. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Course the young uns shouldn’t done it—sent - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - mine off along to bed— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Helped to pry Boggs out the cistern—he warn’t - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - more’n three-quarters dead. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Didn’t no one ’prove the actions, but when all - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - them kids was gone, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Thunder mighty! How we hollered! Gab’rel - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - couldn’t heered his horn. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0005" id="link2H_4_0005"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - CY NYE, PREVARICATOR - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Gy - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Nye - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Thunder, how he’ll lie! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Never has to stop and think—never has to try. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Says he had a settin’ hen that acted clean pos- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sessed; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Says a kag o’ powder couldn’t shake her off her - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - nest; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Didn’t mind a flannel rag tied around her tail; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ev’ry now and then he’d take ’er, souse ’er in - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a pail; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Never had the least effect—feathers even friz; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Then she set and pecked the ice, but ’tended - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - right to biz. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Peared to care for nothin’ else ’cept to set and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - set; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Didn’t seem to care a tunket what she drunk - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - or et. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Cy he said he got so mad he thought he’d use - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ’er ha’ash, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So he went to feedin’ on ’er hemlock sawdust - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - mash. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Hen she gobbled down the stuff, reg’lar as - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - could be; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Reely seemed to fat ’er up,” Cy says he to me. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Shows the power of the mind when it gets a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - clutch. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Hen imagined it was bran—helped ’er just as - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - much. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Then she hid her nest away—laid a dozen eggs; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Leven chickens that she hatched all had wooden - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - legs, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - T’other egg it wouldn’t hatch—solid junk o’ - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - wood, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Hen’s a-wrasslin’ with it yet—thinks the thing - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - is good. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Thunder, how he’ll lie! - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - But he’s dry, - </p> - <p class="indent35"> - —That Cy. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Cy - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Nye - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Tells another lie: - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Claims to be the strongest man around here; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - this is why: - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Says he bought a side o’ beef up to Johnson’s store, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Tucked it underneath his arm—didn’t mind it - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - more - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Than a pound o’ pickled tripe; sauntered down - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the road, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Got to ponderin’ Bible texts—clean forgot his - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - load. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - All to once he chanced to think he meant to get - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - some meat, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Hustled back to Johnson’s store t’other end the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - street, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Bought another side o’ beef. The boys com- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - menced to laugh, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Vummed he hadn’t sensed till then he lugged - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the other half. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Can’t deny - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - ’T he can lie, - </p> - <p class="indent35"> - —That Cy. - </p> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0006" id="link2H_4_0006"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - UNCLE BENJY AND OLD CRANE - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Once there was a country lawyer and his name - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - was Hiram Crane, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he had a reputation as the worst old file in - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Maine. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And as soon’s he got a client, why, the first - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - thing that he’d do - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Was to feel the critter’s pocket and then soak - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - him ’cordin’ to. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Well, sir, one day Benjy Butters bought a hoss, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and oh, ’twas raw - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Way old Benjy he got roasted, and he said he’d - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - have the law. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So he gave the case to Hiram, and then Hiram - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - brought a suit - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And got back the hoss and harness and what - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Benjy gave to boot. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When he met him at the gros’ry Benjy asked - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - him for the bill, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And when Hiram named the figger, it was - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - steeper’n Hobson’s hill. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Poor old Benjy hammed and swallered—bill jest - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sort of took his breath, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the crowd that stood a-listenin’ thought - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - perhaps he’d choke to death. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But it happened that the squire felt like jokin’ - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - some that day, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he says, “Now, Uncle Benjy, there won’t be - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a cent to pay - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - If you’ll right here on the instant make me up a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - nice pat rhyme; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Hear you’re pretty good at them things—give - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - you jest three minutes’ time.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the squire grinned like fury, tipped the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - crowd a knowing wink, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - While old Benjy started in, sir, almost ’fore - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - you’d time to think: - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Here you see the petty lawyer leanin’ on his - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - corkscrew cane. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Sartin parties call him Gander, other people call - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - him Crane. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Though he’s faowl, it’s someways daoubtful - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - what he is, my friends, but still - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - You can tell there’s hawk about him by the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - gaul-durned qritter’s bill.” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Crane got mad, he wanted money, but the crowd - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - let on to roar, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And they laughed the blamed old skinflint right - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - square out the gros’ry store. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0007" id="link2H_4_0007"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - “PLUG” - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - For sixty years he had borne the name - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Of “Plug”—plain “Plug.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Those many years had his village fame - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Published the shame of his old-time game, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Till all the folks by custom came - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - To call him “Plug.” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And so many years at last went by - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They hardly knew the reason why; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - At least they never stopped to think, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And dropped the old suggestive wink. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he took the name quite matter-of-fact, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Till most of the folks had forgot his act; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But sometimes a stranger’d wonder at - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The why of a nickname such as that, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - —Of “Plug”—just “Plug.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Then some old chap would shift his quid - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And tell the story of what he did. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “He owned ten acres of punkin pine, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Twas straight and tall, and there warn’t a sign - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But what ’twas sound as a hickory nut, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And at last he got the price he sut. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They hired him for to chop it down. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He did.—By gosh, it was all unsoun’. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Was a rotten heart in every tree. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But there warn’t none there but him to see. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And quick as ever a tree was cut, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He hewed a saplin’ and plugged the butt. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Plugged the butt, sir, and hid away - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For about two months, for he’d got his pay. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But there warn’t no legal actions took, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They never tackled his pocket-book. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Twould a-broke his heart, for he’s dretful snug; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But he never squirmed when they called him - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - ’Plug.’ - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And over the whole of the country-side, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Up to the day that the critter died, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - ’Twas ‘Plug.’ - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Till some of the young folks scurcely knew - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Which was the nickname, which was the true. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He left five thousand,—putty rich,— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But better less cash than a title sich - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - As ‘Plug.’” - </p> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0008" id="link2H_4_0008"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - THE SONG OF THE HARROW AND PLOW - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - From the acres of Aroostook, broad and mellow - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - in the sun, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Down to rocky York, the chorus of the farmers - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - has begun. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They are riding in Aroostook on a patent sulky - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - plow, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —They are riding, taking comfort, for they’ve - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - learned the secret how. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They are planting their potatoes with a whirring - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - new machine, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Driver sits beneath an awning; slickest thing - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - you’ve ever seen. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There is not a rock to vex ’em in the acres - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - spreading wide, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So they sit upon a cushion, cock their legs, and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - smoke and ride. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Gee and Bright go lurching onward in the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - furrow’s mellow steam; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Over there, with clank of whiffle, tugs a sturdy - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Morgan team. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the man who rides the planter or who plods - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the broken earth - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Joins and swells the mighty chorus of the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - season’s budding mirth. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And they’ve pitched the tune to a jubilant - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - strain. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - They are lilting it merrily now. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - We wait for that melody up here in Maine, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - —’Tis the song of the harrow and plow. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They are picking rocks in Oxford, and in Waldo - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - blasting ledge, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And they’re farming down in Lincoln on their - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - acres set on edge. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Down among the kitchen gardens of the slopes - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - of Cumberland - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They’re sticking in the garden sass as thick as - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - it will stand. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And every nose is sniffing at the scent of fur- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - rowed earth, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And every man is living all of life at what it’s - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - worth. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Though the farmer in Aroostook sails across a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - velvet field, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And his mellow, crumbly acres vomit forth a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - spendthrift yield, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - All the rest are just as cheerful on their hillside - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - farms as he, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For there’s cosy wealth in gardens and a fortune - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - in a tree. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - So they’re singing the song of the coming - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - of Spring, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And the song of the empty mow; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Of the quiver of birth that is stirring the earth, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —’Tis the song of the harrow and plow. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0004" id="linkimage-0004"> </a> - </p> - <div class="fig" style="width:50%;"> - <img src="images/0043.jpg" alt="0043 " width="100%" /><br /> - </div> - <h5> - <a href="images/0043.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a> - </h5> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0009" id="link2H_4_0009"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - HOORAY FOR THE SEASON OF FAIRS - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - This is the season for fairs, by gosh, oh, this is - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - the season for fairs; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - They’re thicker than spatter, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - But what does it matter? - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They scoop up the cash, but who cares? - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - From now till October they’ll swallow the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - change, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - These state fairs and town fairs and county and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - grange, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But apples blush brighter arrayed on a plate, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the cattle look scrumptious in dignified - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - state, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Enthroned in a stall and a-gazing with scorn - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - On the chaps going by without ribbon or horn. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the trotters and nags of the blood-royal - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - strain - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Are a-furnishing fun for the people of Maine; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - While prouder than princes they prance to the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - band, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And ogle the ladies arrayed on the stand. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ah, every exhibit in stall or in hall, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - From hooked rug to hossflesh and punkin and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - all, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Takes on a new meaning, assumes a new light, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And is, for the moment, a wonderful sight. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And people hang over the stuff that’s displayed, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They swig up whole barrels of red lemonade, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And hark to the fakirs and tumble to snides, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And treat all the young ones to merry-go rides. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They sit on the grand stand, man crushed - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - against man, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - All shouting acclaim to the track’s rataplan; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And all the delight is as fresh and as bright - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As though the big crowd had not seen that same - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sight. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the people flock home with the dust in their - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - eyes, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But with hearts all a-fire with fun and surprise. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The girls are a-humming the tune of the band, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And dads are relating the sights from the stand; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The dames are discussing the fancy work part, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - While bub hugs the Midway scenes close to his - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - heart. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The palms of the men folks still glow from a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - grip, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the women are thinking of lip pressed to - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - lip, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For all of the folks in the loud, happy throng - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Have met with the friends “they’ve not seen - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - for so long.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A hail and salute from the press of the mass, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Too brief, as the crowd jammed impatient to - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - pass, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A moment—that’s all—to renew the old tie, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A handgrasp, a lip-touch, “Hello,” and “Good- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - by.” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Oh, this is the season of fairs, by gosh, the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - season to lay off your cares, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Each fair is a wonder, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - They’re thicker than thunder. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Hooray for the season of fairs! - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0010" id="link2H_4_0010"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - HAD A SET OF DOUBLE TEETH - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Oh, listen while I tell to you a truthful little - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - tale - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Of a man whose teeth was double all the solid - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - way around; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He could jest as slick as preachin’ bite in two a - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - shingle nail, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Or squonch a moulded bullet, sah, and ev’ry - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - tooth was sound. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’ve seen him lift a kag of pork, a-bitin’ on the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - chine, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And he’d clench a rope and hang there like a - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - puppy to a root; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And a feller he could pull and twitch and yank - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - upon the line, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - But he couldn’t do no bus’ness with tha’ - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - double-toothed galoot. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He was luggin’ up some shingles,—bunch, sah, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - underneath each arm,— - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - The time that he was shinglin’ of the Baptist - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - meetin’-house; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The ladder cracked and buckled, but he didn’t - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - think no harm, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - When all at once she busted and he started - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - down kersouse. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - His head, sah, when she busted, it was jest - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - abreast the eaves; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And he nipped, sah, quicker’n lightnin’, and - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - he gripped there with his teeth, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he never dropped the shingles, but he hung - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - to both the sheaves, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Though the solid ground was suttinly more’n - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - thirty feet beneath. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He held there and he kicked there and he - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - squirmed, but no one come. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - He was workin’ on the roof alone—there - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - warn’t no folks around. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He hung like death to niggers till his jaws was - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - set and numb, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And he reely thought he’d have to drop them - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - shingles on the ground. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But all at once old Skillins come a-toddlin’ down - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - the street. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Old Skil is sort of hump-backed and he allus - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - looks straight down; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So he never see’d the motions of them Number - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - ’Leven feet, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And he went a-amblin’ by him—the goramded - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - blind old clown! - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Now this ere part is truthful—ain’t a-stretehin’ - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - it a mite,— - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - When the feller see’d that Skillins was a- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - walkin’ past the place, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Let go his teeth and hollered, but he grabbed - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - back quick and tight, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ’Fore he had a chance to tumble, and he hung - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - there by the face. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he never dropped the shingles and he never - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - missed his grip, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And he stepped out on the ladder when they - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - raised it underneath. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And up he went a-flukin’ with them shingles on - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - his hip, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —And there’s the satisfaction of a havin’ - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - double teeth. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0011" id="link2H_4_0011"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - GRAMPY’S LULLABY - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Your marmy’s mixin’ cream o’ tartar biskit up - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - for tea; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Fie, deedle, deedle, leetle ba-a-arby! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And I reckon you had better come and roost - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - upon my knee; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Tumpy, dumpy, deedle, leetle barby! - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I s’picion how ye never heard of Ebernezer - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Cowles. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Tell ye what, he warn’t brung up to be afraid of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - owls. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Reckon that a spryer critter never tailored - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - boots; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Allus up to monkey tricks and full o’ squirms - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and scoots. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Once he done a curis thing, I vummy, on a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - stump: - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Set a larder up one end and gin’ a mighty jump; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Run right up the larder, jest as nimble as a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - monkey, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Balarnced, I sh’d suttin say, a minit—all a- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - hunky; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Then he straddled out on air and grabbed the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - pesky larder - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And run ’er up another length—another length, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - suh, farder; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Skittered up that larder ’fore she had a chance - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - to teeter, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Quicker’n any pussy cat—lighter’n a mos- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - keeter. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Soon’s he clambered to the top, grabbed the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - upper rung, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ketched hisself with t’other hand, and there the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - critter hung. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Gaffled up his britches’ slack and took a resky - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - charnce - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And thar’ he held hisself right out, arms-length, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - suh, by his parnts. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ye ought ter heerd, my barby dear, the cheerins - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and the howls - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The crowd let out when they’d obsarved that - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - trick of Mister Cowles. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Sing’lar thing of which I sing—might not - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - think ’twas true; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Fie, deedle, deedle, leetle ba-a-arby! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But ye know, my leetle snoozer, grampy wouldn’t - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - lie to you, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —To his dumpy, dumpy deedle, leetle - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - barby. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Hush, I guess that mammy isn’t done a-makin’ - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - bread, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We ain’t at all pertic’lar how she overhears - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - what’s said. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ye’re over-young, purraps, to hear of Sam’wel - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Doubl’yer Strout, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Weighed about two hundred pounds, and, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - chowder, warn’t he stout! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Used to work for me one time as sort of extry - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - hand, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Allus planned to ’gage him when I cleared up - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - any land; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Once I see him lug a rock with fairly mod’rit - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ease - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So hefty that at ev’ry step he sunk above his - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - knees. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Hain’t at all surprised to see the wonder in your - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - eye; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Fie, deedle, deedle, leetle ba-a-arby! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But ye know your poor old grampy wouldn’t - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - tell ye ary lie, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —To his tumpy, dumpy deedle, leetle - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - barby. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Course ye’ve never heerd ’em tell of Atha-ni-al - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Prime, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For he was round a-raisin’ Cain so long afore - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - your time. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Used to run the muley saw down to Hopkins - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - mill, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Allus euttin’ ding-does up—a master curis - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - pill! - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Once the chaps that tended sluice stood upon a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - log, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Got to argyin’ this and that, suthin’ ’bout a dog. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Clean forgot to start the log a-goin’ up the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sluice, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But shook their fists and hollered round and spit - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - torbarker juice. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Atha-ni-al heerd the towse and grabbed a pick- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - pole up, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Wasn’t goin’ to stop a mill to fight about a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - pup,— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Tied a rope around the pole and then he let her - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - flam, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Speared the end of that air log and yanked her - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - quicker’n Sam. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Log, suh, come right out the bark, he twitched - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the thing so quick; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Fellers never felt the yank, ’twas done so smooth - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and slick. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Log come out and up the sluice and left behind - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the bark, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Fellers thought the log was there and stood - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and chawed till dark. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Sing’lar things has come to pass when I was - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - young as you; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Fie, deedle, deedle, leetle ba-a-arby! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And best of all, what grampy sings you bet your - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - life is true, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Tumpy, deedle, dumpy, leetle barby. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0012" id="link2H_4_0012"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - HOSKINS’S COW - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Hoskins’s cow got into the pound and the notice - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - was tacked on the meetin’-house door: - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Come into my yard, one brindle cow with three - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - white feet, and her shoulders sore, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Galled by a poke,—and the owner is asked - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - to call at the pound and take her away.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Well, Hoskins knew she was his all right, but, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - you see, he hadn’t wherewith to pay. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The cow was breachy—she wasn’t to blame, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - for Hoskins had turned her abroad to roam; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - She had to battle for daily grass, for the bovine - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - cupboard was bare at home. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So Hoskins had hitched on her withered neck a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - wooden “regalia”—sort of a yoke, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Supposed to keep her from breachy tricks, but - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the poor old creature employed the “poke” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To rip up fences and let down bars; her hunger - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sharpened her slender wits, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And somehow she sneaked through the guarded - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - gates, and gave the garden sass regular fits. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The neighbors pitied her starving state, but at - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - last she stubbornly wouldn’t shoo; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They pounded tattoos on her skinny ribs till it - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - really seemed they would whack ’em through. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But she got so toughened and callous and hard, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and the stiffened frame of her mortised bones - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Formed such an excellent armor-plate against - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the broadsides of sticks and stones, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That they “pounded” her then in a different - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - way—in the village pound—whose walls - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - would hold - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The breachiest cow that ever strayed—and the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - notice was posted as I have told. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - She stood there a day and she stayed there a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - night; she cropped the scanty bushes and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - grass, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And moo-ed and loo-ed in a yearning way, when- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ever a person chanced to pass. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —She ate the leaves from some alder sprouts - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - for a scanty breakfast the second day, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And munched the twigs for her dinner, alas, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and longed, oh, so much, for some meadow - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - hay. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That night she gnawed at her dry old poke,— - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a painful meal, for the slivers ran - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - In her tongue; so she crouched by the high- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - barred gate and seemed deserted of God and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - man. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And Hoskins knew that they had his cow, and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Hoskins knew of her solemn fast, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For he’d gone up the highway and looked - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - through the gate in her dumb, reproachful eyes - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - as he passed. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Yet what, may I ask, could the poor man do? - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - He was right in a place where he couldn’t - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Pay, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —He had three dollars, ’tis true enough, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and ‘twould square the bill, but, you see, that day - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The catchers had come and taken his dogs: a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - hound, a setter, and brindle-pup, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And a man like Hoskins would ne ’er endure to - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - have the dog-pound gobble them up, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For he gunned on Sundays behind the hound, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and the bull was entered and backed to fight. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And Hoskins, you see, as a sporting man had a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - reputation to keep upright. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I wonder, friends, if you’ve ever thought, while - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - you’ve stormed at rum as the poor man’s curse, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There are chaps so built on the mental plan that - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - keeping dogs will warp them worse? - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The “dog” man may be reclaimed, but I’ve - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - been compelled, alas, to see - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That there doesn’t appear to be much hope for - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the wretched critter condemned to three. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And Hoskins’s duty was plain to him: his - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - youngsters wailed for the milk they missed, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But Hoskins thought of his poor, poor dogs and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - gripped his dollars tight in his fist. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He shut his ears to his children’s cries, he steeled - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - his heart when he passed the pound, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To the mute appeal in the old cow’s eyes; but - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - he smiled at last when his dogs were found. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he gladly proffered the three lone plunks - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - to sate the greed of the legal hogs, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And proudly he took the highway back, a-lead- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ing his licensed, bailed-out dogs. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And they barked and yipped and yapped and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - yawped at a poor old tottering cow they found - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Absorbed in a desperate, hungry reach for a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - thistle outside the village pound. - </p> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0013" id="link2H_4_0013"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - AN OLD STUN’ WALL - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - If ye only knew the backaches in an old stun’ - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - wall! - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - O, Lordy me, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - I’m seventy-three! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Begun amongst these boulders and I’ve lived - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - here through it all. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I wasn’t quite to bub’s age there, when dad - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - commenced to clear - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The wust of ninety acres with a hoss team and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a steer. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And we’ve used the stun’s for fencin’ and we’ve - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - built around the lot, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - O, I’ve tugged and worked there, sonny, ontil - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - gracious me, I’ve sot - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And fairly groaned o’ evenings with the twinges - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - in my back; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Sakes, there warn’t no shirkin,’ them days; it - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - was tug and lift and sack, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For it needed lots of muscle, lots of gruntin’, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - lots of sand - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - If a feller calculated for to clear a piece of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - land. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Bub, it isn’t any wonder that our backs has got - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a hump, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That our arms are stretched and awkward like - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the handle on a pump, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That our palms are hard and calloused, that we - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - wobble in our gait - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —There’s the reason right before you ’round - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the medders in the State. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And I wonder sometimes, sonny, that we’ve - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - any backs at all - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When I figer on the backaches in an - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Old - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - Stun’ - </p> - <p class="indent35"> - Wall. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - If ye only knew the backaches in an old stun’ - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - wall! - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - We read of men - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Who with a pen - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Have pried away the curses that have crushed - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - us in their fall. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I don’t begrudge them honor nor the splendor - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - of their name - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For an av’rage Yankee farmer hasn’t any use - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - for fame, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But the man who lifted curses and the man - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - who lifted stones - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Never’ll hear a mite of diff’runce in the - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Heavenly Father’s tones. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For I have the humble notion, bub, that when - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - all kinds of men, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The chaps that pried with crowbar and the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - chaps that pried with pen, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Are waitin’ to be measured for the things - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - they’ve done below - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The angel with the girth-chain’s bound to give - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - us all fair show. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the humble man who’s tussled with the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - rocks of stubborn Maine - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Won’t find that all his labor has been thankless - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and in vain. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And while the wise and mighty get the glorious - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - credit due - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The man who took the brunt of toil will be - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - remembered too. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The man who bent his aching back will earn - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - his crown, my child, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - By the acres he made fertile and the miles of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - rocks he piled. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That ain’t my whole religion, for I don’t propose - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - to shirk - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - What my duties are to Heaven,—but the gospel - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - of hard work - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Is a mighty solid bed-rock that I’ve built on - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - more or less; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I believe that God Almighty has it in his heart - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - to bless - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For the good they’ve left behind them rough old - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - chaps with humped-up backs - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who have gone ahead and smoothed things with - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the crowbar and the axe. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For if all our hairs are numbered and He notes - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the sparrow’s fall - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He understands the backaches in an - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Old - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - Stun’ - </p> - <p class="indent35"> - Wall. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0014" id="link2H_4_0014"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - THE STOCK IN THE TIE-UP - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - I’m workin’ this week in the wood lot; a hearty - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - old job, you can bet; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I finish my chores with a larntern, and marin has - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the table all set - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - By the time I get in with the milkin’; and after - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - I wash at the sink, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And marm sets a saucer o’ strainin’s for the cat - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and the kittens to drink. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Your uncle is ready for supper, with an appetite - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - whet to an edge - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That’ll cut like a bush-scythe in swale-grass, and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - couldn’t be dulled on a ledge. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And marm, she slats open the oven, and pulls - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - out a heapin’ full tin - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of the rippin’est cream-tartar biskit a man ever - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - pushed at his chin. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We pile some more wood on the fire, and open - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the damper full blare, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And pull up and pitch into supper—and com- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - fort—and taste good—wal, there! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the wind swooshes over the chimbly, and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - scrapes at the shingles cross grain, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But good double winders and bankin’ are mighty - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - good friends here in Maine. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I look ’crost the table to mother, and marm she - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - looks over at me, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And passes another hot biskit and says, “Won’t - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ye have some more tea?” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And while I am stirrin’ the sugar, I relish the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sound of the storm. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For, thank the good Lord, we are cosy and the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - stock in the tie-up is warm. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I tell ye, the song o’ the fire and the chirruping - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - hiss o’ the tea, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The roar of the wind in the chimbly, they sound - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - dreadful cheerful to me. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But they’d harrer me, plague me, and fret me, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - unless as I set here I knew - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That the critters are munchin’ their fodder and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - bedded and comf’table too. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - These biskits are light as a feather, but, boy, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - they’d be heavier’n lead - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - If I thought that my hosses was shiv’rin’, if I - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - thought that my cattle warn’t fed. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There’s men in the neighborhood ’round me who - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - pray som’w’at louder than me, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They wear better clothes, sir, on Sunday—chip - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - in for the heathen Chinee, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But the cracks in the sides o’ their tie-ups are - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - wide as the door o’ their pew, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the winter comes in there a-howlin’, with - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the sleet and the snow peltin’ through. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Step in there, sir, ary a mornin’ and look at their - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - critters! ’Twould seem - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As if they were bilers or engines, and all o’ - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - them chock full o’ steam. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’ve got an old-fashioned religion that calkalates - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Sundays for rest, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But if there warn’t time, sir, on week days to - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - batten a tie-up, I’m blest - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’d use up a Sunday or such-like, and let the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - durned heathen folks go - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - While I fastened some boards on the lintel to - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - keep out the frost and the snow. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’d stand all the frowns of the parson before I’d - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - have courage to face - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The dumb holler eyes o’ the critters hooked up - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - in a frosty old place. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And I’ll bet ye that in the Hereafter the men - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - who have stayed on their knees - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And let some poor, fuzzy old cattle stand out in - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a tie-up and freeze, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Will find that the heat o’ the Hot Place is keyed - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - to an extra degree - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For the men who forgot to consider that critters - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - have feelin’s same’s we. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I dasn’t go thinkin’ o’ tie-ups where winter goes - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - whistlin’ through. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Where cattle are humped at their stanchions - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - with scarcely the gumption to moo. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But I’m glad for the sake of Hereafter that - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - mine ain’t the sin and the guilt, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And I tell you I relish my feelin’s when I pull - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - up the big patchwork quilt. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I can laugh at the pelt o’ the snowflakes, and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - grin at the slat o’ the storm, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And thank the good Lord I can sleep now; the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - stock in the tie-up is warm. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0015" id="link2H_4_0015"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - EPHRUM WADE’S STAND-BY IN HAYING - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Ephram Wade sat down in the shade - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And took off his haymaker hat, which he laid - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - On a tussock of grass; and he pulled out the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - plug - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That jealously gagged the old iron-stone jug. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And cocking his jug on his elbow he rigged - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A sort of a “horse-up,” you know, and he - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - swigged - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A pint of hard cider or so at a crack, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And set down the jug with a satisfied smack. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Aha!” said he, “that grows the hair on ye, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - bub, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - My rule durin’ hayin’s more cider, less grub. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I take it, sah, wholly to stiddy my nerves, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And up in the stow hole I pitch ’em some - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - curves - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - On a drink of straight cider, in harnsomer shape - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Than a feller could do on the juice of the grape. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Some new folderinos come ’long every day, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - All sorts of new jiggers to help git yer hay. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Improvements on cutter bars, hoss forks, and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - rakes, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And tedders and spreaders and all of them fakes. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But all of their patents ain’t fixed it so yit - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That hayin’ is done without git-up and git. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - If ye want the right stuff, sah, to take up the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - slack, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The stuff to put buckram right inter yer back, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The stuff that will limber and ile up yer j’ints, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Just trot out some cider and drink it by pints. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It ain’t got no patents—it helps you make hay - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As it helped out our dads in their old-fashioned - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - way. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Molasses and ginger and water won’t do, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Twill irrigate some, but it won’t see ye through. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And ice water’ll chill ye, and skim milk is durn - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Mean stuff any place, sah, except in a churn. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’m a temperate man as a general rule, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —The man who gits bit by the adder’s a fool,— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But when it comes hayin’ and folks have to strain, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I tell you, old cider’s a stand-by in Maine.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Then Ephrum Wade reclined in the shade - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And patiently gazed on the hay while it “made.” - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0016" id="link2H_4_0016"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - RESURRECTION OF EPHRUM WAY - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Old Uncle Ephrum Isaac Way - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —He had a fit the other day. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A sort of capuluptic spell; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He hasn’t been in no ways well - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Since year ago come next July; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He had a sunstroke; come blamed nigh - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To passin’ ’crost. And since, for him, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The poor old man’s been dretful slim. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And ’twarn’t surprisin’ none, I say, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That fit of his the other day. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - By time that Dr. Blaisdell come - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - His legs and arms had growed all numb. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He didn’t sense things source at all, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - His lower jaw commenced to fall, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And, jedged from looks, there warn’t no doubt - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That Ephrum’s soul was passin’ out. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Fact is, they thought that he was dead; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They tied the bandage round his head, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Laid out his shroud—when first they knew, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Eph kicked awhile and then come to; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Got up and stared with all his eyes, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And said, “Why, this ain’t Paradise! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Gol durn the luck, they let me in; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Now here I’m back on earth agin. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’ve been to Heaven! I’ve been dead, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’ve seen it All,” so Ephrum said. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And while we gathered round with awe - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He told us all the things he saw. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And while he yarned that tale of Death - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The parson came, all out of breath, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Exclaiming o ’er and o ’er again, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “A vision! Wondrous! Blest of men!” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And asked, “Oh, tell us, Mr. Way, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - How long were you allowed to stay?” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And then the crowd hung breathless round - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A-harkin’ until Ephrum found - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Some sort of language in his reach, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —For he was sort of dull in speech. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Wal, friends,” he slowly said at last, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “I ricolleet that when I passed - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The pearly gates and sills of gold - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And see that blessed sight unfold - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Before my dim old hazy eyes, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I got a shock of such surprise - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I couldn’t move,—I couldn’t speak, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Jest run my tongue down in my cheek - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And sort of numbly pronged and pried - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The chaw I took before I died. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —That’s been my habit all my days; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When I am nervous anyways - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I don’t fly all to gosh. Instid - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I simply, calmly shift my quid. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But jest as I had rolled her ’crost— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Wal, suthin’ dropped and I was lost. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And all of Heaven, friends, I saw - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Was while I shifted that air chaw.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I think, dear sir, I scarce need add - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That seldom do you see so glad - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A resurrection time as they - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who stood there gave old Ephrum Way. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The parson first he tried to screw - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - His face up solemn, but that crew - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Broke out and howled like they was daft. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And so he laughed and laughed and laughed. - </p> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0017" id="link2H_4_0017"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - LOOK OUT FOR YOUR THUMB - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Hindsight is clearer than foresight, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - But foresight is better and safer, old chap. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Experiment teaches, but common sense reaches - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And tests the bright baubles in Dame Future’s - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - lap. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’m telling you what Eph Landers did - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The time that the critter lost his fid. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He was sort of a quick, impulsive man; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —When others walked, he always ran. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He never waited to calmly view, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But he got right up and slam-banged through. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Believed that the moments a feller took - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To give the future a good square look - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Was simply so much wasted time; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - His plan was, “Never look up; just climb.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He was yankin’ boulders a week ago - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And things got balky and movin’ slow. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He strung the chain ’round a good big rock - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And found that he lost the little block - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To catch the link; it’s used instid - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of a hook and link, and it’s called a fid. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And Eph, he held the unhooked chain - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - By the ends, and he looked and he got profane. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But he couldn’t find it and wouldn’t wait, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —He was mad as a bug and desperate, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the crack-brained critter—what do ye - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - think? - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Why, he stuck his thumb in the unhooked link. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He didn’t consider that ’twarn’t his fid, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But the oxen started—and then he did! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He see’d his mistake, as most men do, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When the deed is done and the thing is through: - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - You stick your thumb where it don’t belong - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the world will yank it, good and strong. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - <i>Hindsight is clearer than foresight, </i> - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - But you’d better ask foresight to give ye a - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - point; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Or, first thing you’re knowin’, Old World will be - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - goin’, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And he’ll laugh while you howl with your thumb - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - out of joint. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0018" id="link2H_4_0018"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - THE TRIUMPH OF MODEST MARIA - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Maria’s comb hung lopsy-wise - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And flapped athwart her filmy eyes, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Exactly like a slattern’s hair - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - On washing day; and I declare - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - She was the slouchiest-looking hen - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That pecked in T. B. Tucker’s pen. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Cah-dah! Cah-dut! - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - She was the butt - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of every sort of jibe and cut. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Maria was a Brahma dame, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Broad and squat and plucked and lame. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The Leghorns cast a pitying smile - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Upon her queer, old-fashioned style. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The Plymouth Rocks would jeer and flout - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Because her legs were feathered out. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - The cocks would strut, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Pah-rutt! Pah-rutt! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And snigger at her bloomers’ cut. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The trim white Cochins tip-toed by - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And froze her with disdainful eye; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Each tufted Houdan tossed her plume - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And glared Maria’s social doom. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Where ’er she strolled in all the yard - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Maria got it good and hard! - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Cah-dut! Cah-dah! - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Each social star - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Just dropped Maria with a jar. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But she pursued her quiet way, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And picked and scratched the livelong day, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Kept early hours and ate bran mash, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Nor sought to cut a social dash. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And then one day she left her nest - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With pallid comb and swelling breast. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Cah-dut! Cah-dah! - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Hooray, hurrah! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Maria, you’re a queen, you are! - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The news went cackling round the pen - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —An egg! It measured twelve by ten. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And T. B. Tucker drove to town - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To take that gor-rammed big egg down. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The editor put on his specs, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The villagers turned rubber necks, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And some collecting feller paid - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Right smart for what Maria laid. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And European news was set - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Aside that week by the Gazette - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - In order that a glowing pen - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Might pay due praise to that old hen. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Cah-lip! Cah-lop! - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - You’ll find, sure pop, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That modest merit lands on top. - </p> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0018b" id="link2H_4_0018b"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - SON HAS GOT THE DEED - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Mother fights with Marshy, and Marshy fights - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - with her, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Don’t give up yer proputty, I’m tellin’ on yer, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - sir! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Don’t give up yer proputty to nary blessed one, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Don’t keer whuther brother, sir, or nephy, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sir, or son. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Don’t make over northin’, sir, ontil you’re done - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and through, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Or ye’ll cuss the day ye done it till the air is - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - black and blue.. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Me and marm got feeble and we couldn’t run - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the farm, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Son was newly married and we couldn’t see the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - harm - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - In makin’ on it over, we to have the ell and shed, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Use the sittin’ room in common—and a room - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - for one spare bed. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And so we made the papers and we signed ’em, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - me and wife, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Lowin’ them the stand and stock, and us our - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - keep for life. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Twelvemonth isn’t finished, but the trouble has - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - begun, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - An’ it’s one continyal rowin’ ’twixt us and her - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and son. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Marshy dings at mother and mother dings at her, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’F things ain’t settled somehow, sir, they’ll git - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - to clawin’ fur. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Don’t give up yer proputty, I’m tellin’ on ye - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - straight. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Don’t keer who your family is, ye’ll rue it sure - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - as fate. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Fore ye sign the papers they’ll come round ye - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - slicker’n cream, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But ye’ll notice little later, sir, that things ain’t - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - what they seem. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Man that’s got his proputty, he’s looked to with - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - respect; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Relations they come meechin’ round to - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - scratch, sir, where he’s pecked. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ye see, he rules the family roost and leads the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - family flock, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As proud and full of manners as a Cochin China - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - cock. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But if the years have loosened up his intellect - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and grip, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And if he thinks his folks are straight, and lets - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the old farm slip, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He’ll find the grin becomes a frown and sweet- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ness turns to greed, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For folks see things in different light when once - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - they’ve got a deed. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Now Marshy snarls at mother and mother sends - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - it back, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And all the time, from sun to sun, it’s clack and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - clack and clack! - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Don’t give up yer propputy, hang on till death, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - I say; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It’s time when you are done with it to give your - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - all away. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Oh, how the devil snickers round when some - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - old codger drools - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - About “the laying down of cares”—and jines - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the ranks of fools! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And how the lawyers laugh and joke, and how - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the angels weep, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To see some old folks deed away their farm for - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - board and keep! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Never see’d no better cook than Marshy - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - used to be, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When first along she’d ask us down to dinner - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - or to tea. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Used to sweeten grub with smiles when she - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - would pass a plate, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And me and marm, like two old coots, we swal- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - lowed hook and bait. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - You bet we git some diff’rent looks, we git some - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - different feed, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Jest like they’d throw it out to dogs, now son - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - has got the deed. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - An’ Marshy growls at mother, and mother’s - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - growlin’ wuss, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - An’ I—wal, I jest set and smoke and cuss— - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and cuss—and cuss! - </p> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0019" id="link2H_4_0019"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - AN IDYL OF COLD WEATHER - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - When all the sky seems blazing down, and sun- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - shine curls the bricks, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And General Humidity puts in his biggest licks, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I welcome with a moist and dripping - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - palm, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A placid old philosopher who runs a little farm, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who says imagination helps a deal in keeping - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - cool, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And who to comfort other men makes this his - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - simple rule: - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To talk of piping, biting days, and drifting - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - winter storm - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Whene ’er the weather pipes it up and gets too - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - thunderin’ warm. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They’re better far than fizz or smash or juleps, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sure’s you’re born, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —The honest little narratives of Frigid Weather - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - John. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For though the sizzling summer time may boil - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and steam and hiss, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who’d ever, ever think of it while listening to - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - this? - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “I never see’d a winter have a durnder, sharper - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - aidge - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Than in the year of Sixty-one, the year that I - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - drove stage. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I never had so hard a job attendin’ to my biz, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For everything was frizable, that year you bet - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - was friz. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - At last I done a caper that I hadn’t done for - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - years: - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I got a little careless and I friz up both my ears. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The roads was awful drifted and I trod ten - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - miles of snow, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And all the time that zippin’ wind did nothin’, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sah, but blow. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Them ears of mine was froze so hard, stuck out - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - so bloomin’ straight, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I thought the wind would snap ’em off, it blew - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - at such a rate. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And when at last I hauled up home, the missus - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - bust in tears - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And hollered, ‘John, oh, massy me, you’re going - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - to lose your ears.’ - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But I—why, land o’ goodness, I was cooler’n I - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - be now,” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —And he passed his red bandanna up across - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - his steaming brow,— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “I jest got out my hatchet and I chopped two - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - cakes of ice - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And held ’em on my friz-up ears—’twas - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Granpy Jones’ advice. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I didn’t dast go in the house, but set there in - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the shed - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A-holdin’ them two chunks of ice to either - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - side my head. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The chunks weighed fifty pounds apiece—that - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - doctorin’ didn’t cost— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And so I got ’em big enough to take out all the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - frost. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - My wife came out at last to see what made me - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - keep so still, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And there I was, sound asleep and snorin’ - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - fit to kill. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - She got me in and gave me tea and helped me - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - inter bed, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With that ’ere ice a-frozen tight and solid to my - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - head. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Twas sort of curi’s, I confess, but still I slept - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - complete, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A crystal palace on my head and soapstones on - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - my feet. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It wasn’t really what you’d call a calm and rest- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ful night, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But when the ice peeled off next day them ears - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - come out all right.” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They’re better far than fizz or smash or juleps, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sure’s you’re born, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —These honest little narratives from Frigid - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Weather John. - </p> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0020" id="link2H_4_0020"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - BUSTED THE “TEST YOUR STRENGTH” - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - When pa was down to Topsham fair - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I snooped around and heard him swear - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To Jotham Briggs that it seemed to him - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That muscle nowadays was slim, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For he said he’d stood there quite a length, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Seein’ folks whang at the “test your strength,” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And there wasn’t a one in all that spell - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who’d hit a crack that had tapped the bell. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And pa talked loud and he sassed the crowd, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the crowd sassed pa, and he allowed - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He’d show ’em what; and so old Jote - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Just held his hat and his vest and coat; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And pa he rolled his sleeves up tight, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Hauled out his plug and took a bite. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He whirled one arm in wind-mill style, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Then whirled the other one awhile. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He picked his pessle out at length - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And sassed the great, tall “test your strength.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “I’m goin’ to soak ye now,” says pa, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “You’ll think it’s y’earthquakes by the jar. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Git out the way and giv’ me swing, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —I’ll bust the ha’slet out the thing.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And pa he spit in both his fists - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And give the handle two three twists, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And swung the beetle round and round - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To give one big, gol-rippin’ pound. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - One knee was right up’ginst his chin, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - His eyes stuck out, his lips sucked in, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And down he fetched her with a jolt, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But pa—but pa—he missed his holt! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He lost his grip, the pessle flew, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And folks they scattered, I tell you. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Some chaps fell down and some they ducked, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And them fur off, by gosh, they hucked. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For that air pessle, sir, it come - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Sky-hootin’ like a ten-inch bomb. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It landed more’n eight rods away - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Right through the top of Drew’s new shay, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Right ’twixt the gal and Ezry Drew, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And hully gee, it scart ’em blue. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - While pa—wal, pa, he jest turned green - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Gawked fust at Drew, then that machine. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And hammed and stuttered out at length, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “I aimed ’er at that to test your strength’!” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Good eye!” says Ez, as mad as sin, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And then he snorted, “Drunk agin!” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And pa—wal, warn’t a thing to say, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Cept pull,—and ask Ez, “What’s to pay?” - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0021" id="link2H_4_0021"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - “WHEN A MAN GETS OLD” - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - The clash and the clatter of mowing-machines - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Float up where the old man stands and leans - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - His trembling hands on the worn old snath, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As he looks afar in the broadening path, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Where the shivering grasses melt beneath - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A seven-foot bar and its chattering teeth. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - When a man gits old, says he, - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - When a man gits old, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - He is mighty small pettaters - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - As I’ve just been told. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I used to mow at the head of the crew, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And I cut a swath that was wide as two. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Covered a yard, sah, at every sweep; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The man that follered me had to leap. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I made the best of the critters squeal, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And nary a feller could nick my heel. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The crowd that follered, they took my road - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As I walked away from the best that mowed. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But I can’t keep up with the boys no more, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - My arms are stiff and my cords are sore: - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And they’ve given this rusty scythe to me - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —It has hung two years in an apple-tree— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And told me to trim along the edge - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Where the mowing-machine has skipped the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ledge. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It seems, sah, skurcely a year ago - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That I was a-showin’ ’em how to mow, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A-showin’ ’em how, with the tanglin’ grass - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Topplin’ and failin’, to let me pass; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A-showing ’em how, with a five-foot steel, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And never a man who could nick my heel. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But now it’s the day of the hot young blood, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And I’m doin’ the job of the fuddy-dud; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Hacking the sides of the dusty road - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the corner clumps where the men ain’ - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - mowed. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And that’s the way, a man gits told, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He’s smaller pettaters when he grows old. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0022" id="link2H_4_0022"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - I’VE GOT THEM CALVES TO VEAL - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - It’s a jolly sort of season, is the spring—is the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - spring, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And there isn’t any reason for not feeling like a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - king. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The sun has got flirtatious and he kisses Mis- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - tress Maine, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And she pouts her lips, a-saying, “Mister, can’t - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - you come again?” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The hens are all a-laying, the potatoes sprouting - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - well, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And fodder spent so nicely that I’ll have some - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - hay to sell. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But when I get to feeling just as well as I can feel, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - All to once it comes across me that I’ve got - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - them calves to veal. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Oh! I can’t go in the stanchion, look them - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - mothers in the eye, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For I’m meditatin’ murder; planning how their - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - calves must die. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Every time them little shavers grab a teat, it - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - wrings my heart, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Hate to see ’em all so happy, for them cows - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and calves must part. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That’s the reason I’m so mournful; that’s the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - reason in the spring - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I go feeling just like Nero or some other wicked - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - thing, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For I have to slash and slaughter; have to set - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - an iron heel - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - On the feelings of them mothers; I have got - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - them calves to veal. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Spring is happy for the poet and the lover and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the girl, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But the farmer has to do things that will make - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - his harslet curl. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the thing that hits me hardest is to stand - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the lonesome moos - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of that stanchion full of critters when they find - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - they’re going to lose - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Little Spark-face, Little Brindle—when the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - time has come to part, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the calves go off a-blatting in a butcher’s - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - rattling cart. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Though the cash the butcher pays me sort of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - smooths things up and salves - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - All the really rawest feeling when I sell them - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - little calves, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Still I’m mournful in the springtime; knocks - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - me off my even keel, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Seeing suffering around me when I have them - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - calves to veal. - </p> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0023" id="link2H_4_0023"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - THE OFF SIDE OF THE COW - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Old Wendell Hopkins’ hired man is an absent- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - minded chap, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He’ll start for a chair, and like as not set down - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - in some one’s lap. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I happened along where he stopped to bait his - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - hosses the other day, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —He’d given the hosses his luncheon pail and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - was trying to eat their hay, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —A kind of a blame fool sort of a trick for even - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a hired man, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But he tackled a different kind of a snag when - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - he fooled with Matilda Ann, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —When he fooled with Matilda Ann, by jinks, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - he got it square in the neck, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the doctors say, though live he may, he’s a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - total human wreck. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - He’s wrapped in batting and thinking now - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Of the grief in insulting a brindle cow. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Matilda Ann gives down her milk and she - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - doesn’t switch her tail; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - She gives ten quarts—week in, week out, and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - she never kicks the pail. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - She doesn’t hook and she doesn’t jump, but even - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Matilda Ann - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ain’t called to stand all sorts of grief from a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - dern fool hired man. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And when he stubbed to the milking-shed in - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sort of a dream and tried - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To make Matilda “So” and “Whoa” while he - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - milked on the wrong, off side, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - She giv’ him a look to wilt his soul and pugged - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - him once with her hoof, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And I guess that at last his wits were jogged as - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - he slammed through the lintel roof. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - He’s got a poultice on his brow - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Of the size of the foot of a brindle cow. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Now study the ways of the world, my son; oh, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - study the ways of life! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It’s the hustling chap that gets the cash, or the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - girl he wants for a wife; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It’s the feller that spots the place to grab, when - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Chance goes swinging by, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who gets his dab in the juiciest place and the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - biggest plum in the pie; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There’s always a chance to milk the world— - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - there’s a teat, a pail, and a stool; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There’s a place for the chap with sense and grip, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - but a dangerous holt for a fool. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For while the feller that’s up to snuff drums a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - merry tune in his pail, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The fool sneaks up on the left-hand side and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - lands in the grave or in jail. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - —It’s an awkard place, as you’ll allow, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - The off-hand side of the world or a cow. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0024" id="link2H_4_0024"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - THE LYRIC OF THE BUCK-SAW - </h2> - <p class="indent30"> - Ur-r rick, ur-r raw, - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - Ur-r rick, ur-r raw! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Have you buckled your back to an old buck-saw? - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Have you doubled your knee on a knotty stick - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And bobbed to the tune of ur-r raw, ur-r rick? - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Have you sawed till your eye-balls goggled and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - popped, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Till your heart seemed lead and your breath was - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - stopped? - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Have you yeaked her up and yawked her down, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —As doleful a lad as there was in town? - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - If so, we can talk of the back-bent woe - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That followed the youngsters of long ago. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ah, urban chap, with your anthracite, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Pass on, for you cannot fathom, quite, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The talk that I make with this other chap - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who got no cuddling in Comfort’s lap. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - You’ll scarcely follow me when I sing - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of the rasping buck-saw’s dancing spring, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For the rugged rhythm is fashioned for - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The ear that remembers ur-r rick, ur-r raw. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - Ur-r raw, ur-r rick. - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - Ur-r raw, ur-r rick! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We pecked at our mountain stick by stick. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Our dad was a man who was mighty good - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - In getting the women-folks lots of wood. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And as soon as sledding came on to stay - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Jack got all work and he got no play. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For daily the ox-sleds creaked and crawked - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Till the yard was full and the buck-saws talked. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Twas rugged toil and we humped our backs, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But we scarce kept pace with dad’s big axe. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There were bitter mornings of “ten below,” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There were days of bluster and days of snow, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But with double mittens, a big wool scarf, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And coon-skin ear-laps, we used to laugh - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - At the fussiest blast old Boreas shrieked, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the nippingest pinches Jack Frost tweaked, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We were warm as the blade of the yanking saw - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That steamed to the tune of ur-r rick, ur-r raw! - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - Ur-r raw, ur-r rick, - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - Ur-r raw, ur-r rick! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ho, men at the desks, there, dull and sick! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - You slap your hands to your stiff old backs - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - At thought of the days of the saw and axe; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And you press your palms to an aching brow, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And shiver to think of a saw-buck now. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But ah, old fellows, you can’t deny - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - You hanker a bit for the times gone by, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When the toil of the tasks that filled the day - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Made bright by contrast our bits of play. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Oh, grateful the hour at set of sun, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When the tea was hot, and the biscuits “done;” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When chocking his axe in the chopping-block, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Dad sung, u Knock off, boys, five o’clock.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Now tell me truly, ye wearied men, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Are you ever as happy as you were then, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When you straightened your toil-bent, weary - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - backs - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - At the welcome plop of dad’s old axe? - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And tell me truly, can you forget - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The sight of the table that mother set, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When dropping the saws in the twilight gloom, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We trooped to the cheer of the dear fore-room, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And there in the red shade’s mellow light - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Made feast with a grand good appetite? - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Made feast at the sweet old homespun board - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - On the plum preserves and the “crab jell” stored - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For demands like these; and made great holes - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - In the heaps of the cream o’ tartar rolls? - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ah, gusto! fickle and faint above - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The savory viands you used to love, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - What wouldn’t you give for the sharp-set tang - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That followed those days when the steel teeth - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sang? - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —For zest was as keen as the bright, swift saw - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When you humped to the tune of ur-r rick, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ur-r raw? - </p> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0025" id="link2H_4_0025"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - MISTER KEAZLE’S EPITAPH - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Foster the tinker traversed Maine - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - From Elkins town to Kittery Point, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With a rattling pack and a rattling brain, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And a general air of “out of joint.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A gaunt old chap with a shambling gait, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - A battered hat, and rusty clothes, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With grimy digits in sorry state, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And a smooch on the end of his big red nose. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - That was the way that Foster went, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - —Mixture of shrewdness and folly blent, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Mending the pots and the pans as ordered, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - But leaving the leak in his nob unsoldered. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But Foster the tinker was no one’s fool; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - He fired an answer every time. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Twas either a saw or proverb or rule, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Or else a bit of home-made rhyme. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And while he knocked at a pot or a pan - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And puffed the coals of his little blaze, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He was ready and primed for the jocose man - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Who thought that the tinker was easy to - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - phase. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - It chanced that Foster stopped one night - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - With a man who thought a master sight - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Of being esteemed as smart’s a weasel - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - —Man by the name of Obed Keazle. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he pronged at Foster the evening through - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - While the folks were having a merry laugh; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And they laughed the most when he said, “Now - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - you - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Compose me a good nice epitaph, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And your lodging here shan’t cost a cent.” - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - So Foster snapped at the chance and said - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He would have it ready before he went, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And would make one verse ere they went to - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - bed. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - So Keazle listened with deep delight - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - While he heard the guileless chap recite, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - With his head a-cock like a huge canary, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - This sample of his obituary: - </p> - <p class="indent35"> - Thus he begun - </p> - <p class="indent35"> - Verse number one: - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - “A man there was who died of late, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Whom angels did impatient wait, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - With outstretched arms and smiles of love - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - To bear him to the Realms Above.” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Foster the tinker slept that night - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - On a feather tick that was three feet thick, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And Keazle attended in calm delight - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - To warm the bed with a nice hot brick. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And the tinker sat at the breakfast board - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - And blandly smiled and ate and ate, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Then piled on his back his motley hoard - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And took his stand at the front yard gate. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - He said, “I’ll give ye the other half - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Of that strictly fust-class epitaph.” - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - There are doubts you know as to how it - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - suited, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - But the tinker didn’t wait—he scooted. - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - For thus ran—whew! - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - Verse number two: - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - While angels hovered in the skies - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Disputing who should bear the prize, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - In slipped the devil like a weasel - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And Down Below he kicked old Keazle.” - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0026" id="link2H_4_0026"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - PLAIN OLD KITCHEN CHAP - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Mother’s furnished up the parlor—got a full, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - new haircloth set, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And there ain’t a neater parlor in the county, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - now, I’ll bet. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - She has been a-hoarding pennies for a mighty - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - tedious time; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - She has had the chicken money, and she’s saved - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - it, every dime. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And she’s put it out in pictures and in easy - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - chairs and rugs, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Got the neighbors all a-sniffin’ ’cause we’re - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - puttin’ on such lugs. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Got up curtains round the winders, whiter’n - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - snow and all of lace, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Fixed that parlor till, by gracious, I should never - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - know the place. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And she says as soon’s it’s settled she shall give - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a yaller tea. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And invite the whole caboodle of the neighbors - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - in to see. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Can’t own up that I approve it; seems too much - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - like fubb and fuss - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To a man who’s lived as I have—jest a blamed - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - old kitchen cuss. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Course we’ve had a front room always; tidy place - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - enough, I guess, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Couldn’t tell, I never set there, never opened it - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - unless - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Parson called, or sometimes mother give a party - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - or a bee, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When the women come and quilted and the men - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - dropped round to tea. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Now we’re goin’ to use it common. Mother - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - says it’s time to start, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - If we’re any better’n heathens, so’s to sweeten - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - life with art. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Says I’ve grubbed too long with plain things, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - haven’t lifted up my soul. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Says I’ve denned there in the kitchen like a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - woodchuck in his hole. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —It’s along with other notions mother’s getting - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - from the club; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But I’ve got no growl a-comin’, mother ain’t let - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - up on grub! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Still I’m wishin’ she would let me have my - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - smoke and take my nap - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - In the corner, side the woodbox; I’m a plain old - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - kitchen chap. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I have done my stent at farmin’; folks will tell - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - you I’m no shirk; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There’s the callus on them fingers, that’s the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - badge of honest work. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And them hours in the corner when I’ve stum- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - bled home to rest - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Have been earnt by honest labor and they’ve - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - been my very best. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Land! If I could have a palace wouldn’t ask no - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - better nook - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Than this corner in the kitchen with my pipe - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and some good book. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’m a sort of dull old codger, clear behind the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - times, I s’pose; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Stay at home and mind my bus’ness; wear some - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - pretty rusty clothes; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Druther set out here’n the kitchen, have for - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - forty years or more, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Till the heel of that old rocker’s gouged a holler - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - in the floor; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Set my boots behind the cook stove, dry my old - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - blue woolen socks, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Get my knife and plug tobacker from that dented - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - old tin box, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Set and smoke and look at mother clearing up - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the things from tea; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Rather tame for city fellers, but that’s fun - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - enough for me. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I am proud of mother’s parlor, but I’m feared - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the thing has put - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Curi’s notions her noddle, for she says I’m - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - underfoot; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Thinks we oughter light the parlor, get a crowd - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and ontertain, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But I ain’t no city loafer,—I’m a farmer down in - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Maine. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Course I can’t hurt mother’s feelin’s, wouldn’t - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - do it for a mint, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Yet that parlor business sticks me, and I guess - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’ll have to hint - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That I ain’t an ontertainer, and I’ll leave that - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - job to son; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’ll set out here in the kitchen while the folks - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - are having fun. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And if marm comes out to get me, I will pull - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - her on my lap, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And she’ll know—and she’ll forgive me, for I’m - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - jest a kitchen chap. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0027" id="link2H_4_0027"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - TAKIN’ COMFORT - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - I wouldn’t be an emp’ror after supper’s cleared - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - away; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - I wouldn’t be a king, suh, if I could. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So long as I’ve got health and strength, a home - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - where I can stay, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And a woodshed full of dry and fitted wood. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For Jimmy brings the bootjack, and mother trims - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - the light, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And pulls the roller curtains, shettin’ out the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - stormy night. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And me and Jim and mother and the cat set - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - down— - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Oh, who in tunket hankers for a crown? - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who wants to spend their ev’nin’s sittin’ - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - starched and prim and straight, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - A-warmin’ royal velvet on a throne? - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It’s mighty tedious bus’ness settin’ up so - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - thund’rin’ late, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - With not a minit’s time to call your own. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’d rather take my comfort after workin’ through - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - the days - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With my old blue woolen stockin’s nigh the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - fire’s social blaze, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For me and Jim and mother and the old gray cat - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Come mighty near to knowin’ where we’re at. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0028" id="link2H_4_0028"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - EPHRUM KEPT THREE DOGS - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Ephrum Eels he had to scratch durned hard to - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - keep ahead, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —But he always kept three dogs. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He couldn’t keep a dollar bill to save his life, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - they said, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —But he always kept three dogs. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He said he might have been some one if he’d - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - had half a chance, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But getting grub from day to day giv’ Ephrum - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - such a dance, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He never got where he could shed the patches - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - off his pants; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —But he always kept three dogs. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ephrum’s young ones never looked as though - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - they was half-fed, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —But he always kept three dogs. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The house would be so cold his folks would - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - have to go to bed; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —But Ephrum kept three dogs. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - One was sort of setter dog and two of ’em was - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - houn’s, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Their skins was full of Satan; they was always - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - on their roun’s, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Till people durned their pictures in half a dozen - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - towns, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —But Ephrum kept his dogs. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They ’bated Ephrum’s poll-tax’cause he was too - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - poor to pay, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —But Ephrum kept his dogs. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - How he scraped up cash to license ’em it ain’t - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - in me to say, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —But I know he kept his dogs. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And when a suff’rin’ neighbor ambuscaded ’em, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Eph swore— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Then in a kind of homesick way he hustled - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - round for more; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He struck a lucky bargain and, by thunder, he - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - bought four! - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —Jest kept on a-keepin’ dogs. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0029" id="link2H_4_0029"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - LAY OF DRIED-APPLE PIE - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Sunning themselves on the southern porch, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Where the warm fall rays from the towering - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - torch - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of the great sun flash in the glowing noons, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The drying apples, in long festoons, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Drink the breath of the crisp fall days, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Borrow the blush of the warming rays; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Storing their sweetness, their rich bouquet, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Against that savage and wintry day - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When the housewife’s fingers shall by and by - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Mould them into dried-apple pie. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There they mellow and there they brown, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Homely enough to a man from town, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Merely strings of some shrunken fruit, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Swung in the sun. And yet they’re mute - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Memory-ticklers to those who know - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The ways of the farm in the long-ago: - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —The kitchen table, the heaping store - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of round, red apples upon the floor. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The purr of the parer, the mellow snip - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As the busy knives thro’ the apples slip. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The merry chatter of boys and girls, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The rosy clutter of paring curls, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As hurrying knives and fingers fly - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - O ’er the luscious fruit for dried-apple pie. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’m idly thinking it sure must be - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That the rollicking sport of the apple-bee, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —The sweetness of smiles, the touch of the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - white - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Hands flashing there in the candle-light,— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Must all in a mystic way be blent - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - In one grand flavor;—that such was lent - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To those mellowing strings, those festoons dun - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Swinging there in the late fall sun. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For lo, as I look I seem to see - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A dream of the past, a fantasy, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —A laughing, black-eyed roguish girl - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Whirling a writhing paring curl; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Chanting the words of the old mock spell - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That all we children knew so well: - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Three times round and down you go! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Now who is the one that loves me so?” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Merely a fancy, a passing gleam - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of the old, old days;—a sudden dream - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Beguiled by some prank of a blurring eye - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the tricking song of a big, blue fly; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Merely a fancy, and yet, ah me, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - How often I’ve wondered where she can be. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There they mellow and there they brown, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Homely objects to folks from town; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Only some apples hung to dry - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And doomed to be finally tombed in a pie. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <h3> - ONLY HELD HIS OWN - </h3> - <p class="indent15"> - Now there’s Hezekiall Adams—nicest man you - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ever saw! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Never had a row with no one; never once got - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - into law; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Always worked like thunderation, but to save - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - his blessed life, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Never seemed to get forehanded—and I’ve laid - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - it to his wife, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For she always kept him meechin’; calls him - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - down with sour tone, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Till the critter hasn’t gumption for to say his - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - soul’s his own. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - T’other day - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Happened to ride along his way; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Heseki’, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Like a gingham rag hung out to dry, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Peak-ed and pale, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Lopped on the gate ’cross the upper rail. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Howdy!” says I, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Blamed if I know,” says Heseki’. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Don’t feel sick, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But marm’s kept my back on a big hot brick - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Till I can’t tell - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Whuther I’m ailin’ or whuther I’m well.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Think,” says I, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “It’s too early to hoe when the ground’s so dry?” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Says he, “’Bout all - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’m sartin’ of is, I shall dig come fall.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Says I, “Things look - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Like we farmers can fatten the pocket-book.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Mebbe,” says he, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “But inarm vows there ain’t much she can see.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Ye can’t jest crawl,” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Says I, “but there’s money for folks with - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sprawl.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Old Hezekiah shifted legs and give a lonesome - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - groan; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “I begun with these two hands,” said he, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “And I’ve only held my own.” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He has always worked like blazes, but, has - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - always seemed to fail; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Made his grabs at prancin’ Fortune, but has - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - caught the critter’s tail; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Never jumped and gripped the bridle—wouldn’t - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - darst to on his life; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Always acts too blasted meechin’—and I’ve laid - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - it to his wife. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0030" id="link2H_4_0030"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - GRAMPY SINGS A SONG - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Row-diddy, dow de, my little sis, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Hush up your teasin’ and listen to this: - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Tain’t much of a jingle, ’tain’t much of a tune, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But it’s spang-fired truth about Chester Cahoon. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The thund’rinest fireman Lord ever made - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Was Chester Cahoon of the Tuttsville Brigade. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He was boss of the tub and the foreman of hose; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When the ’larm rung he’d start, sis, a-sheddin’ - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - his clothes, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Slung cote and slung wes’cote and kicked off - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - his shoes, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A-runnin’ like fun, for he’d no time to lose. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he’d howl down the ro’d in a big cloud of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - dust, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For he made it his brag he was allus there fust. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Allus there fust, with a whoop and a shout, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he never shut up till the fire was out. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he’d knock out the winders and save all the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - doors, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And tear off the clapboards, and rip up the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - floors, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For he allus allowed ’twas a tarnation sin - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To ’low ’em to burn, for you’d want ’em agin. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He gen’rally stirred up the most of his touse - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - In hustling to save the outside of the house. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And after he’d wrassled and hollered and pried, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He’d let up and tackle the stuff ’twas inside. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To see him you’d think he was daft as a loon, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But that was jest habit with Chester Cahoon. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Row diddy-iddy, my little sis, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Now see what ye think of a doin’ like this: - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The time of the fire at Jenkins’ old place - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It got a big start—was a desprit case; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The fambly they didn’t know which way to turn. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And by gracious, it looked like it all was to burn. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But Chester Cahoon—oh, that Chester Cahoon, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He sailed to the roof like a reg’lar balloon; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Donno how he done it, but done it he did, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Went down through the scuttle and shet - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - down the lid. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And five minutes later that critter he came - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To the second floor winder surrounded by - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - flame. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He lugged in his arms, sis, a stove and a bed, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And balanced a bureau right square on his head. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - His hands they was loaded with crockery stuff, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - China and glass; as if that warn’t enough, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He’d rolls of big quilts round his neck like a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - wreath, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And carried Mis’ Jenkins’ old aunt with his - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - teeth. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - You’re right—gospel right, little sis,—didn’t - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - seem - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The critter’d git down, but he called for the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - stream. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And when it comes strong and big round as my - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - wrist - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He stuck out his legs, sis, and give ’em a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - twist; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he hooked round the water jes’ if ’twas a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - rope - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And down he come easin’ himself on the slope, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —So almighty spry that he made that ’ere - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - stream - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As fit for his pupp’us’ as if ’twas a beam. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Oh, the thund’rinest fireman Lord ever made - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Was Chester Cahoon of the Tuttsville Brigade. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0031" id="link2H_4_0031"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - UNCLE MICAJAH STROUT - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Guess that more’n a dozen lawyers, off and on, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - from time to time, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Tried to settle down in Hudson, but they - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - couldn’t earn a dime. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Never got a speck of business, never had a single - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - case, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Said they never in their travels struck so - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - blimmed-blammed funny place. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - People did a lot of hustling, town was flourish- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ing enough, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Everybody but the lawyers had his fingers - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - full of stuff. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Lawyers stayed till they got hungry, then they’d - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - pull their shingles down - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And go tearing off to somewhere, damning right - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and left the town. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Told the lawyers round the county, “Hudson’s - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - bound to starve you out - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Till some patriot up and poisons one old cuss - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - down there named Strout. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - ’Cause they won’t fork up a fee, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Long’s he’s round to referee. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - ’Case of difference or doubt - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Folks say, 6 Wal, we’ll leave her out - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - To Uncle Micajah Strout.’” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - If a farmer bought a heifer and she didn’t run - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - to milk, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - If a dickerer in horse trades struck a snag or - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - tried to bilk, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - If two parties got to haggling over what a farm - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - was worth, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Or if breeders split in squabbling over weight or - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - age or girth; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - If a stubborn line-fence quarrel, right-of-way dis- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - pute, or deed, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Claim of heirship or of debtor, honest error, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - biassed greed, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Rose to foster litigation, no one scurried to the law, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - No one belched out objurgations, sputtered oaths, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - or threatened war, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For there was a ready resource in a certain plain - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - old gent, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Unassuming, blunt, and honest. When he said - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a thing it went. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So there was no chance for wrangle, disputations, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - snarls, or fray, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When the people of the village universally could - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - say, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - “Oh, what’s the use to fuss? - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - We shall only make a muss. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - We can fix it in about - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - Half a minute. Leave it out - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - To Uncle Micajah Strout.” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So no wonder all the lawyers banned and cursed - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the place, and left; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For contention was but fleeting and the town - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - was never cleft - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - By a quarrel or dissension. Rows were always - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - settled young - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - By the pacifying magic of. Micajah’s ready - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - tongue. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When at last his days were ended and he passed - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —well, now you bet - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That he had the biggest funeral ever seen in - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Somerset. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Miss him? Guess we miss Micajah, but if ever - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - dreams come true, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’ve a sort of sneaking notion that he hasn’t yet - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - got through - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Settling things for us in Hudson; for I dreamed - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —and this is straight— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That I died and went to Heaven, but was yanked - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - up at the gate. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Peter showed me facts and figures, all the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - records, and allowed - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That I’d have to take my chances down below - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - with t’other crowd; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Said the thing was pretty even, but he had to - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - draw it fine, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Then commenced to hunt the index for the next - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - shade in the line. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I protested, and we had it, this and that, and pro - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and con, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And I hung and begged and argued when he - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - told me to move on. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Till at last he called a cherub, sent the little - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - chap inside, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Owning up that he was bothered as to how he - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - should decide. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - “But I’ll give you all the show. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - That I can,” said he. “You know, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - I’ve arranged, in case of doubt, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - —When it’s close,—to leave it out - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - To Uncle Micajah’s trout.” - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0032" id="link2H_4_0032"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - THE TRUE STORY OF A KICKER - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - There lived two frogs, so I’ve been told, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - In a quiet wayside pool; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And one of those frogs was a blamed bright frog, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - But the other frog was a fool. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Now a farmer man with a big milk can - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Was wont to pass that way; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he used to stop and add a drop - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Of the aqua pure, they say. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And it chanced one morn in the early dawn, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - When the farmer’s sight was dim, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He scooped those frogs in the water he dipped, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —Which same was a joke on him. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The fool frog sank in the swashing tank - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - As the farmer bumped to town. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But the smart frog flew like a tug-boat screw, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And he swore he’d not go down. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So he kicked and splashed and he slammed and - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - thrashed, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And he kept on top through all; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he churned that milk in first-class shape - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - In a great big butter ball. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Now when the milkman got to town, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And opened the can, there lay - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The fool frog drowned; but, hale and sound, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - The kicker he hopped away. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0033" id="link2H_4_0033"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - MORAL. - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Don’t fret your life with needless strife, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Yet let this teaching stick: - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - You’ll find, old man, in the world’s big can - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - It sometimes pays to kick. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0034" id="link2H_4_0034"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - ZEK’L PRATT’S HARRYCANE - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Twould make an ox curl up and die - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To hear how Zek’l Pratt would lie. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —Why, that blamed Zeke - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Could hardly speak - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Without he’d let some whopper fly. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Come jest as natchrul to him, too, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —’Twas innocent, and them as knew - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Zeke’s failin’s never took great stock, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But jest stood back and let him talk; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Jest let him thrash his peck o’ chart, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Then got behind his back to laugh. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Why, Zeke would—jest hold on and see - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - What that old liar told to me. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Last fall while gettin’ in his grain - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He said he see’d a harrycane - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —A cikerloon, as they say West— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A-boomin’ on like all possesst. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And Zekel see’d to his consarn - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Twas bound plumb straight for his new barn. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “’Twas crickitul,” says he. “Thinks I, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’ve got to be almighty spry. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - If somethin’ ain’t done kind o’ brash - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That barn will get chawed inter hash. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It don’t take long for me to think, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And what I done was quicker’n wink. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Jest gafflin’ up a couple boards - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I sashayed out deerectly to’ards - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That howlin’, growlin’ harrycane - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That come a-raisin’ merry Cain. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “When I’d got out as fur’s my wind - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Would take me, I slacked up and shinned - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That cob-piled monnyment o’ stones - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Between my land and Bial Jones. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Though I don’t scare - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - I’ll own, I swear, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It sent a twitter through my bones - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When I got where that I could see - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The thing ’twas goin’ to tackle me. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Twas big and round and blacker’n Zip, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —And powerful? My sakes, ’twould grip - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A tree or bam or line o’ fence - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And make ’em look like thirty cents. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - While all the time it growled and chawed - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And spit the slivers forty rod. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —As things looked then a bob-tailed darn - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Was too much price for Pratt’s new barn. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “But let me tell ye this, my son, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Me’n them boards warn’t there for fun. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I held one underneath each arm; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - The ends stuck out - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - In front about - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ten feet. I held ’em aidge to aidge - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And made a fust-class kind of wedge. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I grit my teeth. There was a calm - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For jest a minit, kind o’ ’s ef - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That harrycane had stopped itse’f - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And snickered, snorted, laughed, and yelled, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Then stopped again and sort o’ held - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Its breath; then swellin’ up its breast - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Swooped down to knock me galley-west. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “It grabbed them boards and then ’twas fight! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But scare me? Not a gol-durned mite! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It pulled and tugged and yanked and hauled - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And tooted, howled, and squealed and squalled; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It picked up sculch and dirt, and threw, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And followed with a tree or two; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It hit me with a rotten squash, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And give me fits with Marm Jones’ wash. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But ’twarn’t no use, suh, Zek’l Pratt - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ain’t built to scare at things like that. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I jest let into that air tyke - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And punched its innards reg’lar-like - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With them ’ere boards, and honest true, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I split her square and plumb in two. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - One half went yowlin’ by to right - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And one to left—and out’ of sight. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - While Zek’l Pratt was still on deck - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With Marm Jones’ night-gown round his neck.” - </p> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0035" id="link2H_4_0035"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - THOSE PICKLES OF MARM’S - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - It doesn’t need eyesight to tell that it’s fall, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Up here in Maine. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Though the glamor of yellow is over it all, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And the cold, swishing rain - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Comes peltering down and goes stripping the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - leaves, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And smokes in cold spray from the edge of the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - eaves. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - All, it’s wild out of doors, but come in here with - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - me - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Where mother’s as busy as busy can be. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And you need not your eyes, sir, to know it is fall - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - In this stifle and stirring and steam like a pall. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For there’s savor of spices and odorous charms - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When your nose gets a sniff of these pickles of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - marm’s. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - You know it is fall without using your eyes, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Up here in Maine. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There is fragrance that floats as the flower-pot - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - dies - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - In the tears of the rain. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the hand of the frost strips the sheltering - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - leaves - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - From the pumpkins, those bombs of the sentinel - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - sheaves - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That stiffly and starkly keep gnard in the field, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A desolate rank without weapon or shield. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the fragrance of death like a delicate musk - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Floats up from the field through the crispness of - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - dusk; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Yet out from the kitchen, more savory far, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Drifts the fragrance of pickles compounded by - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - ma. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The autumn sweeps past like a dame to a ball, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Up here in Maine. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Her perfumes would stagger shy Springtime, but - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Fall, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Like a matron of Spain, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Puts musk in her bosom and scent on her hair, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And prinks her gay robe with elaborate care. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Yet the fragrance she sheds has the savor of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - death, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The brain is turned giddy beneath her fierce - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - breath, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Till over it all floats the vigorous scent - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of spices and hot things and good things, all - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - blent. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It’s wonderful, friend, how it tickles and calms, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —That whiff from those simmering pickles of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - marm’s. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0036" id="link2H_4_0036"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - “THE MAN I KNEW I KILLED” - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Ezra Saunders, of Hopkins’ Creek, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Was the next old soldier asked to speak. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He’d seen his share of the thousands slain - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - In the active days of the Umteenth Maine; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And we settled hack to hear him tell - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - His reasons for thinking that “War is Hell.” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Dear comrades of Keesuncook Post and ladies - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - of the Corps, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I thank you for this invite and I’m proud to - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - take the floor. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I was thinkin’ as I set here of the battles that - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - I’ve fought, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of the suff’rin’ and the slaughter—and the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sudden, awful thought - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Come across me that I’d taken very likely scores - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - of lives, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Taken fathers from their children, taken - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - husbands from their wives. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - While mad with heat of battle I was pumping - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - reeking lead, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Not knowing, no, nor caring, where the bullet - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - found its bed. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Now people they will ask us if we really, truly - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - know - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For a fact that while a-fightin’ we have ever - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - killed a foe. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But it’s rare you find a soldier who has seen, in - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - heat of strife, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That the bullet he had fired was the one to take - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a life. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Now, to-night, I’m going to tell you, though I - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - hate to, boys, I swan, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That I know I’ve done my murder; that I know - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - I’ve killed my man. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “’Twas when we got our rapping at the fight of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Hatcher’s Run; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I was running hard as any;—yes, I threw away - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - my gun - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the rest of my equipment, and proceeded, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - friends, to steer - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Just as fast as legs would help me for protection - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - at the rear. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I was quite a nervy sprinter—‘bout as swift as - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - you will find, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But I couldn’t shake that Johnny who came - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - slammin’ on behind; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For he had the Georgy straddle and was sort of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - razor-edged, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And if nothin’ special busted, I was spoke for, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - so I jedged. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He was hanging to his rifle, but he didn’t try to - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - shoot, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —He see he had me solid,—but I give the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - blame galoot - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A standard mile or such-like and had druv him - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - in the list,’ - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When I stepped upon a hubble, fell, and give - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - my leg a twist. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the tumble sort of stunned me so I laid - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - there quite a spell, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Expectin’ that he’d grab me; just a-harkin’ for - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - his yell. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But things stayed calm and quiet, so I peeked; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - he laid there sprawled - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Bout a dozen yards behind me. And he looked - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - so queer I crawled - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Slowly back to reconnoitre, got where I could - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - see his head, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Saw his face was black’s a stove-pipe. Apo- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - plexy! He was dead. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And I stood and wept above him, stirred, dear - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - comrades, to the peth - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With the awful, awful pity for that man I’d run - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - to death. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And my conscience always pricked me and my - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - heart with grief is filled, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For there ain’t no question, comrades, there’s a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - man I know I killed.” - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0037" id="link2H_4_0037"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - ’LONG SHORE CRUISE OF THE “NANCY P.” - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - We was off Seguin with the “Nancy P.,” - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - From the Sheepscot bound for Boston way; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We was one day out, and massy me! - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - What a leak she’d sprung sence she left the bay! - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Why, never knowed sech an awful leak, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Gad, we made her old pump squeak, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Gad, we made it whoop and hump, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - —Two at a turn, on the stiddy jump,— - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - Ker-chonk, ker-chump, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With an up yo-ho and a down ker-bump. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But the more we pumped, the more she drawed, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And we all turned to for a mighty pull; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But when we giv’ her the soundin’ rawd, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Why, bless yer soul, she was jam, bang full. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Plumb, jamb full to the soaked old deck, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Full to her gol-durned tarred old neck; - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Wonder was how she kept aflo’t, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - With the sea a-gozzlin’ in her thro’t; - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Ker-do’t, ker-do’t, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —And we couldn’t leave, ’cause there wam’t no - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - bo’t. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So we hung to the pump and we giv’ her Cain, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Though it didn’t seem to be no use. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We thought of the good dry ground in Maine, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And durned the pelt of that old caboose, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Durned the hide of a tops’l tub, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - For we never thought we’d see the Hub; - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - —Got so scart we forgot to thank - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Our lucky stars for a lo’d of plank, - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - Ker-clink, ker-chank, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And still we bounced that old pump crank. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So we woggled on like a bale of hay, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And we set our teeth and we pumped with - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - groans. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - At last we got to Boston bay; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - But our arms were stretched to our ankle bones, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Hands were the size of corn-fed hams, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Eyes bulged out like the horns o’ rams, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - We humped like monkeys bound for war, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And ev’ry man had a raw, red paw, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Ker-haw, ker-haw, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We beached that tub—and then we saw— - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The “Nancy P.,” she’d grown that old, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Her butts had rotted all away. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Her lo’d of planks still jammed the hold, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - But we’d left her bottom in Sheepscot bay. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - So there we’d made a tumble try - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - To pump old ’Lantic ocean dry. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Over our rail, ’twixt you and me, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - We’d h’isted, suttin, a mile of sea; - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - Blame me! But we - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Was a darn sick crowd on the “Nancy P.” - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0005" id="linkimage-0005"> </a> - </p> - <div class="fig" style="width:50%;"> - <img src="images/0129.jpg" alt="0129 " width="100%" /><br /> - </div> - <h5> - <a href="images/0129.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a> - </h5> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0038" id="link2H_4_0038"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - TALE OF THE SEA-FARING MAN - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - I purchased a glass of stiff Maine grog for a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - salty son of the sea, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he confidentially leaned on the bar and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - spun this yarn for me: - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ” ’Twas down in the aidge of the Saragos’ in the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - nineteenth latitood - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That I think I see the dumdest sight that ever a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sailor viewed. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “We was dobbin’ along with dumpy sails in a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - nigh-about dead calm, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When the forrard watch give a good long squint, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and he yapped a loud alarm. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “And there afloat, two points to port, was a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - shark, a reg’lar he’un, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The biggest shark I’ve ever seen outside the - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Caribbeun. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “The old man reckoned he’d have his pelt, and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - he yelled to the second mate, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Sling over the biggest hook ye’ve got, with a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - good big plug o’ bait.’ - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “We dragged her astern and his nobs come on, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and then with a mighty splosh, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He gulped the pork, he bit the rope, and away - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - he went, by gosh! - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “But when he’d hipered two miles to lee, and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - begun to wopse and wheel, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We figgered he found the lunch he had a rayther - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - too hearty meal. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Yet right behind the quarter wash the critter - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - swum next day, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And though he gobbled the bait we threw, he - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - allus got away. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “And at last, do ye know, we liked the cuss for - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the way he showed his spunk, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And we named him Pete, and shared salt hoss, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and tossed him a daily junk. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “He got the orts of the fish we caught and, all - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - in all, I’ll bet - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A two-hoss waggin wouldn’t haul the stuff that - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - critter et. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Then one day Jones, the heftiest man we had - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - in all the crew, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Went off the rail with a swinging sail, and Pete - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - he et him too. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “From that time on we tipped our caps to the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - razor-backed old brute, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —We tipped our caps and pulled a bow in a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - most profound salute; - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “For ’twas only due from a decent crew to honor - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a comrade’s grave, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Though ’twas odd, I’ll own, to have a tomb afloat - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - on the ocean wave. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “And the old man ordered the fish lines coiled, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - for he ’lowed ’twarn’t proper game - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To bob behind for a grave-yard lot; so Pete - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - swum on the same, - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ”—Swum on the same, though we come to see - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - that he didn’t act quite right. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For he grew as thin’s a belayin’ pin on that gol- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - durned appetite. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “And we couldn’t figger the secret out, though - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the second mate was firm - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That stowed ’tween decks in the shark’s insides - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - was a bastin’ big tape-worm. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “As we didn’t have no vermifuge we could only - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - mourn for Pete, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And steal salt hoss when the mate wam’t round, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and give him lots to eat. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “But at last he rolled his glassy eyes and give - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - an awful chum, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And turned his belly up to view and drifted off - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - astern. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “He rolled and sogged on a logy swell like a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - nut-cake dropped in fat, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And it ’peared to all there was suthin’ wrong - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - with the shark we was lookin’ at. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “So the old man ordered the gig crew up, and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the bos’n piped a tune, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And away we sploshed with the mate ahead - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a-grippin’ a big harpoon. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “He slung the thing when we drew abreast and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - we hacked like all-possessed; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But the shark was sleepin’ sound, you bet, for - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - we never broke his rest. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ”—We never broke his peaceful snooze, though - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - plunk to the eyelet head - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Went rippin’ in that big harpoon,—for, you see, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the shark was dead. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “And the old man ordered an ortopsy, for the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - thing seemed mighty queer - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That an able-bodied, hearty shark was deader’n - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a door-knob here. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “So the mate was medical ’xaminer, and he - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - straddled the critter’s back - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And laid him open from deck to keel with one - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - almighty whack. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Now listen close while I tell the rest, for this is - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the story’s peth, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —You may take my nob for a scuttle-butt if - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the shark warn’t starved to death. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Starved to death, though the sea was full of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the fattest kind of fish, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Starved, though a seaman plump and sound - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - had tumbled in his dish, - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ”—Starved though he had in his gorged insides - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - I’ll bet a hundredweight - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of every kind of a floating thing from codfish - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - down to bait. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “And this was how: He’d spied, we judged, an - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - empty cask afloat, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And bein’ a glutten he grabbed the thing and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - tucked it down his throat. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “The cask, we found, had an open end—the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - bottom was good and stout - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —The shark had swallowed the whole end fust - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —the open end was out. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “And ev’ry mossel the critter et was scooped by - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the cask inside; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - His vittles failed to reach the spot, and so the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - poor shark died.” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - This is a sample of weird, wild yarns the marin- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ers relate - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Under the spur of a glass of grog in a Prohibi- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - tion State. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0039" id="link2H_4_0039"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - CAP’N NUTTER OF THE “PUDDENTAME” - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - The foam bells tinkle at gilded prow - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —There’s a creamy wake to the far horizon. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And she tiptoes along with a New York bow - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To the curt’sying waves, and we’ll all allow, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - She’s the daintiest yacht we have set our eyes - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - on. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - While sneaking after, in grimy shame, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Rolls tops’l schooner, the “Puddentame.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - On the rocking surge swings the millionaire, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And about him splendor and music and - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - laughter; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The glint of jewels and ladies fair; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Jollity throned, and Old King Care - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Drowned in the brine and dragging after. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - But the billows lift and toss the same - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Old Cap’n Nutter in the “Puddentame.” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Under the gloom of the Porcupines, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - In the gleam of the lights of the summer city, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - In a tapestried cabin the rich man dines, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And toasts his friends in his bubbling wines, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - While the repartee and the careless ditty - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Float from the lips of squire and dame - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - To Cap’n Nutter of the “Puddentame.” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the old man munches his bread and cheese - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - In the gloom and grime of his little cuddy; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Through the mirk of the dusty deadlight sees - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - This riot of riches; then on his knees - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —This sea-stained, warped old fuddy-duddy— - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - He prays for their souls in the Saviour’s - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - name, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - —-Does Cap’n Nutter of the u Puddentame. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And they?—Why, they neither know nor care - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - That the honest chap has knelt and pleaded. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For just at the edge of the dazzling glare - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - From the rocking yacht of the millionaire, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - The old craft swings and sways unheeded. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Yet who’ll sleep better, jaded Fame - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Or Cap’n Nutter of the “Puddentame”? - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0040" id="link2H_4_0040"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - GOOD-BY, LOBSTER - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - We’ve gazed with resignation on the passing of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the auk, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Nor care a continental for the legendary rok; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the dodo and the bison and the ornith-o- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - rhyn-chus - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - May go and yet their passing brings no shade of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - woe to us. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We entertain no sorrow that the megatherium - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Forever and forever is departed, dead and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - dumb: - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But a woe that hovers o ’er us brings a keen and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - bitter pain - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As we weep to see the lobster vanish off the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - coast of Maine. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Oh, dear crustacean dainty of the dodge-holes - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - of the sea, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I tune my lute in minor in a threnody for thee. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - You’ve been the nation’s martyr and ’twas wrong - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - to treat you so, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And you may not think we love you; yet we - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - hate to see you go. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We’ve given you the blazes and hot-potted you, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and yet - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We’ve loved you better martyred than when - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - living, now you bet. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - You have no ears to listen, so, alas, we can’t - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - explain - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The sorrow that you bring us as you leave the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - coast of Maine. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Do you fail to mark our feeling as we bitterly - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - deplore - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The passing of the hero of the dinner at the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - shore? - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ah, what’s the use of living if you also can’t - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - survive - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Until you die to furnish us the joy of one - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - “broiled live”? - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And what can e ’er supplant you as a cold dish - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - on the side? - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Or what assuage our longings when to salads - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - you’re denied? - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Or what can furnish thunder to the legislative - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - brain - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When ruthless Fate has swept you from the rocky - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - coast of Maine? - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I see, and sigh in seeing, in some distant, future - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - age - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Your varnished shell reposing under glass upon - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a stage, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The while some pundit lectures on the curios of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the past, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And dainty ladies shudder as they gaze on you - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - aghast. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And all the folks that listen will wonder vaguely - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - at - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The fact that once lived heathen who could eat - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a Thing like that. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ah, that’s the fate you’re facing—but laments - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - are all in vain - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Tell the dodo that you saw us when you - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - lived down here in Maine. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0041" id="link2H_4_0041"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - CURE FOR HOMESICKNESS - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - She wrote to her daddy in Portland, Maine, from - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - out in Denver, Col., - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And she wrote, alas, despondently that life had - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - commenced to pall; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And this was a woful, woful case, for she was - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a six months’ bride - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who was won and wed in the State of Maine by - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the side of the bounding tide. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And ah, alack, she was writing back that she - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - longed for Portland, Maine, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Till oh, her feelings had been that wrenched she - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - could hardly stand the strain! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Though her hubby dear was still sincere, she - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sighed the livelong day - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For a good old sniff of the sewers and salt from - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the breast of Casco bay. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And she wrote she sighed, and she said she’d - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - cried, and her appetite fell off, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And she’d grown as thin’s a belaying-pin, with a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - terrible hacking cough; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And she sort of hinted that pretty soon she’d - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - start on a reckless scoot - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And hook for her home in Portland, Maine, by - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the very shortest route. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But her daddy dear was a man of sense, and he - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - handles fish wholesale, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he sat and fanned himself awhile with a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - big broad codfish tail; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he recollected the way he felt when he - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - dwelt in the World’s Fair whirl. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He slapped his head. “By hake,” he said, “I - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - know what ails that girl.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he went to a ten-cord pile of cod and he - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - pulled the biggest out, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A jib-shaped critter, broad’s a sail,—three feet - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - from tail to snout. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he pasted a sheet of postage stamps from - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - snout clear down to tail, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Put on a quick delivery stamp, and sent the cod - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - by mail. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - She smelled it a-coming two blocks off on the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - top of the postman’s pack; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - She rushed to meet him, and scared him blind by - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - climbing the poor man’s back. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But she got the fish, hit out a hunk, ate postage - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - stamps and all, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And a happy wife in a happy home lives out in - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Denver, Col. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0042" id="link2H_4_0042"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - ON THE OLD COAST TUB - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Blast from the winter. Wrack-wood and splinter - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Adrift in the smother of roaring lee shore: - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And a blunt-nosed old coaster; some ancient - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - sea-wagon, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Sweeps in from the fog no more—no more, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Rolls in from the sea no more. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Bricks make her load and New York her destin- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - ation. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - (Dern yer hide, ye snoozer, keep a-pumping - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - there, I say!) - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Bricks for a cargo and she leaks like thundera- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - tion, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And the gulls a-trailin’ after like the buzzards - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - sniffin’ prey! - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - Pump away! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And ev’ry brick a-soakin’ in her innards growls - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - and grates; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - She hesitates—she balks and waits, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And holy hawse-pipe, how she hates - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - To leave Penobscot Bay! - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Pounce! On her bows leap the combers like - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - a tiger-cat, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - (Lift ’er on the handle, there, you loafer, - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - pump away!) - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Lurch! Reels her gait, and her sloshin’ scup- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - pers hiccup at - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - The sight of drunken breakers fightin’ past - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - ’er up the bay. - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - Pump, I say! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Oh, give her all the rotten sail her leary masts - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - will lug. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Ka-chig, ka-chug; her ugly mug - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Rolls orkord as a driftin’ jug, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - And so we slosh away. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Grub to last a week, a quadrant and an alma- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - nick; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - (Wag ’er there, you rascal, wag ’er lively - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - there, I say!) - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Rotten are her sails and her hold a-roar with - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - shiftin’ brick, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —Ain’t we up ag’inst it if a norther comes - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - our way? - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - Pump, I say! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Stagger down, ye bloated drunkard, wheel and - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - take the starboard tack! - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Ka-slup, ka-smack, now work ’er back, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Jest hear that old black canvas crack. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Ho! Davy Jones, hooray! - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Black cordage tangled, dead features mangled, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Adrift in the smother of roaring lee shore. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And a blunt-nosed old coaster; - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - some broad-bellied wagon - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Sweeps in from the sea no more - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - —Rolls in from the sea no more, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —no more. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0043" id="link2H_4_0043"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - TALE OF THE KENNEBEC MARINER - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Guess I’ve never told you, sonny, of the strandin’ - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and the wreck - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of the steamboat “Ezry Johnson” that run up - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the Kennebec. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That was ’fore the time of steam-cars, and the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - “Johnson” filled the bill - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - On the route between Augusty and the town of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Water ville. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - She was built old-fashined model, with a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - bottom’s flat’s your palm, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With a paddle-wheel behind her, druv’ by one - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - great churnin’ arm. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Couldn’t say that she was speedy—sploshed - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - along and made a touse, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But she couldn’t go much faster than a man - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - could tow a house. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Still, she skipped and skived tremendous, dodged - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the rocks and skun the shoals, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - In a way the boats of these days couldn’t do to - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - save their souls. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Didn’t draw no ’mount of water, went on top - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - instead of through. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - This is how there come to happen what I’m go- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ing to tell to you. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Hain’t no need to keep you guessing, for I - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - know you won’t suspect - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - How that thunderin’ old “Ez. Johnson” ever - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - happened to get wrecked. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - She was overdue one ev’nin’, fog come down - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - most awful thick; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Twas about like navigating round inside a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - feather tick. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Proper caper was to anchor, but she seemed to - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - run all right, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And we humped her—though ’twas resky— - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - kept her sloshing through the night. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Things went on all right till morning, but along - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ’bout half-past three - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ship went dizzy, blind, and crazy—waves - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - seemed wust I ever see. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Up she went and down she scuttered; sometimes - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - seemed to stand on end, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Then she’d wallopse, sideways, cross-ways, in a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - way, by gosh, to send - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Shivers down your spine. She’d teeter, fetch a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - spring, and take a bounce, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Then squat down, sir, on her haunches with a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - most je-roosly jounce. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Folks got up and run a-screaming, forced the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - wheelhouse, grabbed at me, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Thought we’d missed Augusty landin’ and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - had gone plum out to sea. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Fairly shot me full of questions, but I said - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ’twas jest a blow; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Still, that didn’t seem to soothe ’em, for there - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - warn’t no wind, you know! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Yas, sir, spite of all that churnin’, warn’t a whis- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - per of a breeze - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —No excuse for all that upset and those strange - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and dretful seas. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Couldn’t spy a thing around us—every way - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ’twas pitchy black, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And I couldn’t seem to comfort them poor crit- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ters on my back. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Couldn’t give ’em information, for ’twas dark’s - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a cellar shelf; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Couldn’t tell ’em nothing ’bout it—for I - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - didn’t know myself. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So I gripped the “Johnson’s” tiller, kept the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - rudder riggin’ taut, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Kept a-praying, chawed tobacker, give her steam, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and let her swat. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Now, my friend, jest listen stiddy: when the sun - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - come out at four, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We warn’t tossin’ in the breakers off no stern - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and rockbound shore; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But I’d missed the gol-durned river, and I swow - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - this ’ere is true, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I had sailed eight miles ’cross country in a heavy - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - autumn dew. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There I was clear up in Sidney, and the tossings - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and the rolls - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Simply happened ’cause we tackled sev’ral miles - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - of cradle knolls. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Sun come out and dried the dew up; there she - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - was a stranded wreck, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And they soaked me eighteen dollars’ cartage to - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the Kennebec. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0044" id="link2H_4_0044"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - DRIVE, CAMP, AND WANGAN - </h2> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0045" id="link2H_4_0045"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - THE LAW ’GAINST SPIKE-SOLE BOOTS - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - It’s a case of scuff in your stocking-feet, from - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Seboomook down, my hearties; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Sling your spikers around your neck and swear - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - your way to town. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The dudes that we sent to legislate, and figger - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - at balls and parties, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Haye tinkered the laws to suit themselves, and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - they’ve done us good and brown. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There’s a howl, you bet, from the Medway dam - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - across to the Caucmogummac, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For the laws came up in the tote-team mail, and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - we’ve got the new statoots, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And of all the things that was ever planned to - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - give us a gripe in the stomach, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The worst is the corker that t’runs us down for - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a-wearin’ our old calked boots. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - You can’t chank on to a hotel floor, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - You’ve got to leave calked boots at the door. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They make ye peel your hucks in the street - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And walk to the bar in your stocking-feet. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It’s a blank of a note that a man with chink - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Can’t prance to the rail and get his drink, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But it’s five and costs if ye mar the paint, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And ten if the feller that makes complaint - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Gets mad at a playful push in the eyes - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And goes into court with a lot of lies. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It’s ten if ye sliver a steam-bo’t’s deck - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —There ain’t no argue—it’s right in the neck. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And they soak you, too, on the railroad train; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Why, there’s hardly a loggin’ crew in Maine - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But what has claimed, as a nat’ral right, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A chance to holler and heller and fight, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And knock the stuffin’ out of the seats, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Rip off the blinds and club with the cleats. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But now if the bloomin’ brakeman talks, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And you vaccinate him once with calks; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - If you feel like a man with a royal flush - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And, jest for the joke of it, rip some plush, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Oh, they take that law and they peel you sore; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - You pay for the damage, and ten plunks more. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Tain’t much like the days when we had some - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - rights, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When we roosters sharpened our spurs in fights, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When never a crowd put up galoots - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That could scrap with the fellers with spike-sole - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - boots. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It’s a case of step to the wangan camp, and buy - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - some partent leathers; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And go a-snoopin’ along to town like a dude on - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - his weddin’-trip; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the only thing you can do to a guy is to tickle - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - his nose with feathers, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And curl in your seats in the smokin’-car when - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a drummer gives you lip. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There was fun, by gee, in the good old days - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - when we whooped ’er into the city, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And you trailed our way by the slivers we left - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - from the railroad down to the dives, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And we owned the town where we left our cash; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and now it’s a thunderin’ pity - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - If all of a sudden you’ve grown too good for the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - boys who are off the drives. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Oh, make the laws, go make the laws with your - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - derned old Legislature, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Jest give us orders to wear plug hats and come - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - down in full dress suits. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We’ll wear the togs; but give us spikes, or - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - you’ve busted the laws of nature, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For angels can just as well shed wings as a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - driver his spike-sole boots. - </p> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0046" id="link2H_4_0046"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - THE CHAP THAT SWINGS THE AXE - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Sing a song of paper; first the tall, straight - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - spruce, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Torn from off the mountains for the roaring - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - presses’ use. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —A shrieking laceration by the “barker” and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the saw; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A slow, grim maceration in the grinder’s grum- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - bling maw; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A dizzy dash through calenders and over whir- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ring rolls, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —And the press can smut the paper so to save - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - or damn your souls; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The press has got the paper, it can give you lies - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - or facts - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —That vexes not the fellow up in Maine who - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - swings the axe. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Chock! - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - Chock! - </p> - <p class="indent35"> - Chock! - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The throb stuttered up from the heart of the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - wood, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Erratic and faint, yet the trees understood, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Though distant and dull like the tick of a - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - clock - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It started a tremor through all the great flock. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - King Spruce was a-shiver and rooted with dread, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - While past him to safety the wood people fled; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The fox with his muzzle turned backward to - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - snuff - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The bear trundling on like an animate muff, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And rabbits up-ending in wonder and fright, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Then scudding once more with the others in - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - flight. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Yet that which has reason most urgent to flee - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Stands grim in the rout of the panic—the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Tree! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - While up the long slope, glaring red ’gainst the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - snow,— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - His shirt of the hue of the butcher,—the foe, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Beating fierce at the trunks with relentless - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - attacks, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Comes on to the slaughter, the Man with the Axe. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Chock! - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - Chock! - </p> - <p class="indent35"> - Chock! - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Shudder and totter and shiver and rock! - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —Pygmy assailing with dull steady knock. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Trunk yawning wide with a hideous gash. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Snow-covered limbs thrown a-sprawl; and - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - then crash! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The pens and the presses are waiting, and eyes - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That will glow with delight, or dilate with sur- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - prise. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For there in the heart of the spruce there is - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - rolled - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The fabric for thousands of stories untold. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And on the white paper may later be spread - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The fall of a nation, or fame of one dead - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who now strides abroad in his health and suc- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - cess, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But will pass to the tomb when that log meets - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - the press. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There under the bark of that spruce there is - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - furled - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A web that will carry the news of a world, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That clamors and crowds at the swaying red - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - backs - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of the toilers of Maine, the rough men of the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - axe. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0047" id="link2H_4_0047"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - THE SONG OF THE WOODS’ DOG-WATCH - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Tis the weirdly witching hour of the woods’ - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - “dog-watch,” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When the guide suspends the kettle in the ash - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - limb’s crotch, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Stirs the drowsy, drowsy embers till the cozy - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - fire beams - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And flickers dance like gnomes and elves athwart - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - the glowing dreams - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of the sleeping town-bred fisher who is stretched - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - with placid soul - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - On the earth in sweeter slumber than his town - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - couch can cajole. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ah, ’tis tough on bone and muscle, is this chas- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - ing after fun— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And a sleeper gets to sleeping forty knots along - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - ’bout one. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But the guide is up a-stirring—monstrous shape - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - with flaring torch, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Prodding up the dozing fire for the woods’ “dog- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - watch.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the slow unclosing eyelids of the startled - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - dreamer see - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - This dreadful apparition thrown in shadows on a - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - tree. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And his heart for just a second goes to skirrup- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - ing about - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As it flopped when he was wrestling with that - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - five-three-quarter trout. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But the ogre leaves the shadows, leans against - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - a handy tree - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And remarks: “The water’s bilin’; won’t ye - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - have a cup o’ tea?” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he wakes to a night of the fisherman’s - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - June, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Afar the weird lilt of the dolorous loon - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Floats up from the heart of the fair, velvet - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - night— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A globule of sound winging slow in its flight. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As elfin a note as a gnome ever blew, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It wells from the waters, “Ah-loo-hoo-ah-hoo- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - o-o-o.” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - O spell of the forest! O glimmer and gleam - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - From the sheen of the lake and the mist-breath- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - ing stream! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The night and the stars and the dolorous loon - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Make mystic the spell of the fisherman’s June. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The spruces sing the lyric of the wood’s dog- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - watch; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The kettle as it bubbles in the ash limb’s crotch, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The rustle of the spindles of the hemlock and - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - the pine, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The crackle where the licking tongues of ruddy - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - fire twine, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The oboe, in the distance, of the weird and lone- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - some loon, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —This chorus sings the lyric of the blessed - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - month of June. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - What June? Your June of meadows or your - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - June of scented breeze, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Or your June begirt with roses stretched in - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - hammock at her ease? - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Such a deity for maidens! I can bow to no - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - such June! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I extol the mystic goddess of the Forest’s Silent - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Noon. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Noon of day or noon of night-time—in the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - vast and silent deeps, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Where human care or human woe or human - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - envy sleeps, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Where rugged depths surround me, dim and - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - silent, deep and wide, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And no human shares my joy but that second - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - self, my guide. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Here’s a June that one can worship. Here’s - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - a June by right a queen, 'Neath her hand eternal mountains, ’neath - her - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - feet eternal green.. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And here will I adore her, seeking out her - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - awful throne - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With the Silence swimming round me, and - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - alone, thank God, alone! - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0006" id="linkimage-0006"> </a> - </p> - <div class="fig" style="width:50%;"> - <img src="images/0161.jpg" alt="0161 " width="100%" /><br /> - </div> - <h5> - <a href="images/0161.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a> - </h5> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0048" id="link2H_4_0048"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - FIDDLER CURED THE CAMP - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Wal, things they was deader’n old Billy-be-darn, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The boss was pernickity, cook wouldn’t yam; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For we’d heard ev’ry story old Beans had to spin, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And we hadn’t no longin’s to hear ’em agin; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Old Pitts, the head chopper, we’d pumped him - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - out, too, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —And he swow’d that he’d sung ev’ry song - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - that he knew. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As the rest wasn’t gifted, a sort of a damp - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Old glister of silence fell over Peel’s camp. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The deacon-seat doldrums were blacker’n old Zip, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We’d set there an hour with never a yip, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Cept the suckin’ o’ lips at the quackin’ T.D.‘s, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With the oof and the woo of the lonesome pine - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - trees - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Wistling over our smok’-hole. It grew on us, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - too; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Our thoughts got as thick an’ as musty an’ blue - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As the cloud o’ tobacker smoke, mixed with the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - steams - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - From the woolens that dried on the stringers - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and beams. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Old Attegat Peter said we was bewitched; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He said that he seed the Old Gal when she - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - twitched - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A fistful o’ hair out the gray hosses’ tail - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For a-makin’ witch tattin’. She’d hung on a nail - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The queerisome web, so he said, an’ the holes - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —They were fifty—they stood for the whole - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - of our souls. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - An’ there we would swing, an’ hang there we - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - must, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Till the hoodoo was busted. Eternally cussed, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So he said, was the buffle-brained feller that - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - dared - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To touch the witch-web that was holding us - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - snared. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Aw, we didn’t believe it—‘tain’t like that we - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - did! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But still we warn’t fussy! If we could get - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - rid - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of the dumps by a charm, we was ready to try, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And Peter said singin’ would knock ’em sky - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - high. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Wal, Peter said “singin’;” I can’t tell a lie, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Twarn’t singin’, ’twarn’t nothin’—that - mourn- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ful ki-yi! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That seemed like a beller in ev’ry man’s boot, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - An’ ’twarn’t none surprisin’ the witch didn’t - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - scoot. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So there did we set in a stew an’ a cloud, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A grumpy old, lumpy old dob of a crowd. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But oh, landsy sake a-Peter, when the fiddle come - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - to camp, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - W’y you wouldn’t know the place: - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —Wuz a grin on ev’ry face - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - W’en we know’d the critter’d got it. An’ it - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - reely seemed the lamp - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Had a ’leetric light attachment; an’ you - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - oughter heard us stamp - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When that feller took his fiddle out an’ rosined - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - up the bow. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Then he yawked an’ yeaked an’ yawked - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ’Twistin’ keys ontil she squawked, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - An’ we set there jest a-gawpin’; not a word to - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - say, but, oh, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We was right on pins an’ needles fer to have - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - him let ’er go. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Tweedle-weedle, yeaky, yawky, ’nother twist, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - an’ pretty soon - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - He was waitin’ to begin, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - With ’er underneath his chin; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He a-askin’, all a-grinnin’, “Wall, boys, name - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - it; what’s your tune?” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - An’ we hollered all in concert, “Whoop ’er up - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - on ‘Old Zip Coon’!” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Oh, the deacon-seat had cushions an’ the bunks - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - were stuffed with down, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - While the feller sawed the strings; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - We could feel our sproutin’ wings, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - An’ we wanted to go soarin’, go a-sailin’, wear a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - crown, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Tear the ground up, whoop-ta-ra-ra, mix some - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - red and paint the town. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Oh, he played the “Lights o’ London” an’ he - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - played “The Devil’s Dream,” - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —All the old ones—played ’em all; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Rode right on ’er—made ’er squall; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Didn’t stop to semi-quiver, tip-toe Nancy, pass - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the cream; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - No; he let ’er go Jerooshy, clear the track an’ - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - lots o’ steam. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Thought I’d never heerd such playin’ sence the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Lord had giv’ me breath - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - An’ that P. I.—seems as if - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - He could put the bang an’ biff - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - In the chitter of a cat-gut like to touch the very - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - peth - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - In yer marrow; like to raise yer from the very - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - jaws of death. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So, oh, landsy sake a-Peter, when that fiddle - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - come our way, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Say, you wouldn’t know the place, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —Wus a grin on ev’ry face. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Went to workin’ like the blazes an’ our vittles - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - set—an’ say, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Guess the Hoodoo flew to thunder when the - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Haw-Haw come to stay. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0049" id="link2H_4_0049"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - THE SONG OF THE SAW - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - The song is the shriek of the strong that are - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - slain, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —The monarchs that people the woodlands of - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Maine; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —‘Tis the cry of a merciless war. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And it echoes by river, by lake, and by stream, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Wherever saws scream or the bright axes gleam, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —‘Tis keyed to the sibilant rush of the steam, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And the song is the song of the saw. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Come stand in the gloom of this clamorous - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - room, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Where giants groan past us a-drip from the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - boom, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Borne here from the calm of the forest and hill, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Aghast at the thunderous roar of the mill, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - At rumble of pulley and grumble of shaft - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the tumult and din of the sawyer’s rude - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - craft. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Stand here in the ebb of the riotous blast, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As the saw’s mighty carriage goes thundering - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - past, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - One man at the lever and one at the dog. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The slaughter is bloodless and senseless the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - log, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Yet the anguish of death and the torment of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - hell - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Are quavering there in the long, awful yell, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That shrills above tumult of gearing and wheel - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As the carriage rolls down and the timber meets - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - steel. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Scream! And a board is laid bare for a home. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Shriek! And a timber for mansion and dome, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For the walls of a palace, or toil’s homely use, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Is reft from the flanks of the prostrate King - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Spruce. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And thus in the clamor of pulley and wheel, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - In the plaint of the wood and the slash of the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - steel, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Is wrought the undoing of Maine’s sturdy lords, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —The martyrs the woodlands yield up to our - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - swords. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The song is the knell of these strong that are - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - slain, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The monarchs that people the woodlands of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Maine. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the Fury that whirls in the din of this - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - war, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With rioting teeth and insatiable maw, is the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - saw! - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And this is the song of the saw. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0050" id="link2H_4_0050"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - DOWN THE TRAIL WITH GUM PACKS - </h2> - <p class="indent20"> - Ev’ry nugget clean and sound, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Red’s a jewel, smooth and round, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Worth a dollar’n ten a pound; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Here’s your gum, ye giddy girls, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Here’s your Maine spruce gum. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The chaps that went off with the Klondike - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - diggers - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - For gold—jest gold, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Have slumped in the snow, and they work like - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - niggers, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - And they haven’t got rich, we’re told. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We’re snowshoeing down from the north of - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Katahdin, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - See here! Yum, yum! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Here’s a tole to tease Maud to come into the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - garden - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - —These rich, rosy lumps o’ spruce gum. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Our fires are dowsed in the lonesome old camps, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We’ve left them to wolves and the foxes and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - damps. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The trail of our snowshoes lies snakin’ behind, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For we’re clawing for home with the treasures - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - we’ve mined. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - We’ve no sort of use for the pick and the sluice; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Our Klondike has been the straight trunks of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the spruce. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Let them that elect grub the dirt for a “gleam,” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Our ore is the gum and our lode is the seam - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That doesn’t go sneaking in mire and clay, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But grins at the sun and drinks deep of broad day. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Go grope for your gold in the bowels of mud! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We’ll cleave our fresh nuggets of resinous blood - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Forced out from the heart through the fibre and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - vein - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of the giants who lurk in the woodlands of - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Maine. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Just squint through this bubble and gaze at the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - blaze: - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That red is the fire of hot summer days; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That glimmer is autumn; that glow is the tint - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That was lent by some campfire’s guttering glint. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And here is a globe like the eye of a cat, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And this one is amber like honey; and that - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Is a tear rosy red with the anger and shame - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of a king glooming down as the axe-heavers - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - came; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Staring down as around him his kin roared - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - to earth - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Midst the oaths of the swampers and Labor’s - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - rude mirth. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That tear of the spruce, may it go to the pearls - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Flashing bright ’neath the lips of some sweetest - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - of girls! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - These, then, are the treasures we bring in our - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - packs, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Each round, rosy globule as sweet as the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - smacks - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We’ll get from the kids when they swoop with - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a roar - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - At dad just the second he opens the door. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Clear out your old scraps, Mr. Druggist: we - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - come - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With a good hefty jag of the season’s new gum. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Ey’ry nugget clear and sound, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Red’s a jewel, smooth and round, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Worth a dollar’n ten a pound. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Here’s your gum, ye giddy girls, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Here’s your Maine spruce gum. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0051" id="link2H_4_0051"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - REAR O’ THE DRIVE - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - The rain has raised the river an’ she’s np to - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - driving pitch, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - An’ it’s oh, an’ grab your peavies an’ go sloppin’ - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - in the wet. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We’ve got ter send ’er whoopin’ now without a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ketch or hitch, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But it won’t be kid-glove bus’ness, oh, my - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - hearties, you can bet. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Empty the water out of your boots - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And gaffle your peavies, you P.I. galoots. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There’s the rips at Rundy’s Corner, and the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sluice at Puzzle Gorge; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - You can drive ’em and connive ’em, but the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - timber’s bound to lodge. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - An’ sticks will buck—with best of luck—as - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - offish-like as hogs, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For there ain’t no calkerlatin’ how you’ll run a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - drive o’ logs. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Chase the heathen with a sword, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Run the cattle with a goad, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - All we want’s our Oldtown peavies, when our - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - drives go overboard. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - An’ we’ll foller, sloshin’ in, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Yes, we’ll waller to the chin, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - An’ we’ll herd ’em through the wildest stream - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - that ever frothed and roared. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - So, look alive, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - It’s after five, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - An’ the drouth is a-chasin’ the rear o’ the drive. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Foller down, foller down with your peavies on - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - your backs, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For the herd that runs ahead of us goes loafin’ - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ’less it’s chased. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They know they’re off to market, an’ they dread - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the saw an’ axe, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - An’ you’ve got to go and welt ’em, though the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - water’s to your waist, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For they balk on Depsconneagon when a sixty- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - footer halts; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ev’ry eddy stands a-ready for to swing ’em in a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - waltz. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - An’ ev’ry rock is chock-a-block with jack-strawed - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - pine an’ spruce, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ontil you’ve got the devil’s job to try and turn - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ’em loose. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But our goadstick is the peavy, an’ our cant-dog - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - is the pup - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That’ll worry ’em an’ hurry ’em an’ rush - ’em, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - chase ’em up. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Oh, the drouth is right behind us, but we’ve - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - passed the North Twin flume, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - An’ we’ll beat the sun in heaven in the race for - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Pea Cove boom. - </p> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0052" id="link2H_4_0052"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - MATIN SONG OF PETE LONG’S COOK - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - It’s dark in the camp, and the woods outside - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Are dark, dark, too! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And a hundred men still open wide - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Their loud bay-zoo. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It’s sort of mean to rout ’em jus’ - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - To work once more; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’d like to let each tired cuss - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Jus’ lay and snore. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But I’ve been up for an hour or two - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And grub’s all on; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And now as the cook of Pete Long’s crew - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - I toot my horn. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The weirdest of all wood-sounds, by the way, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Is a cook’s queer cadence at break of day: - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Whoo-e-e-e! - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - Git UP! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The grub is on the table, boys, the coffee’s on - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the bile: - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The swagon’s hotter’n Tophet and I swear ’twill - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - make you smile. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There’s whiskers on the gingerbread, the biskit - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - can’t be beat; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’ve got molasses sinkers made from mother’s - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - old receipt. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Oh, I’ve got molasses sinkers built around - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - some extra holes; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They’ll make you think of home and friends and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - tickle up your souls. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The beans come out a-roarin’ when I boosted - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - up the lid; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They chuckled when I pried ’em out—they - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - laughed, I swear they did. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Don’t jolly me about your smells of Araby the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - blest, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Jus’ take a snuff of ground-baked beans all - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - hot from out their nest. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The grub is on the table, boys, hurroop, hurroop, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - whoo-e-e-e! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Come, tumble out, git on a move! Good Lord, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - it’s after three! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Rise up and shine, my gentle lambs, surround - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - your breakfast quick, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Or else you’ll git the sun’s ha-ha from over - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Tumble Dick. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And if the timer heaves a growl and docks you - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - in his book, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Jus’ blame your own durn lazy luck—don’t - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - lay it on the cook. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For ev’ry man who’s et my cream-of-tartar bis- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - kit knows - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The cook of this ’ere camp, by smut, ’s the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - earliest bird that crows. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - For I’m old enough to spell a-a-a-ble! - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - The grub is all on the ta-a-a-ble! - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Whoo-e-e-e! - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - Git UP! - </p> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0053" id="link2H_4_0053"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - OFF FOR THE LUMBER WOODS - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - The duffle is packed, and the babies are smacked, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and the wife has a buss and a hug; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And she’s done it up brown in a-loading me - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - down with about all the grub I can lug, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - So long! Good-by! - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - I’m off! Don’t cry! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Just about a month of Sundays and you’ll - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - see my homely mug. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Now look ye, ye towzled-haired son of a gun, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Be good to your mother or you’ll see some - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - fun - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When your daddy comes down on the drive in - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the spring - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And fetches a withe with a hornetty sting. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ha! ha! you young rascal, you’d rather have - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - gum? - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Well, be a good baby and pa’ll fetch you some. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Yes, mother, you’re right, it does seem kinder - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - wrong - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To leave you alone here the whole winter - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - long. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And it’s tough that I have to pack dunnage and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - break - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For the big timber wrassle at Chamberlain lake. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But folks are a-waiting for lumber and boards, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They’ve picked up their saws, now they’ve laid - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - down their swords. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They’re wanting the timbers for new city domes, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They’re wanting the shingles for humble new - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - homes. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The hammers are waiting, the nails are on end, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the chorus of clatter’ll commence when we - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - send - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A billion of lumber down race-way and sluice, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - From the lonesome dominions of gloomy King - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Spruce. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The men who print papers are wanting fresh - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sheets, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The folks who build ships will be launching new - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - fleets, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For, mark me, no matter what Uncle Sam - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - planned, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He finds he can’t reach his new back lots by - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - land. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Don’t smile at me, wife, but I feel when I swing - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That sweaty old axe from the fall to the spring, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That I hear one grim cry swimming up on the air - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Through the dim, silent forest,—a pleading - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - prayer. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The clank of the press, and the scream of the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - saws. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The grunt of the grinder that slavers and chaws - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - At the fibre of pulp wood; the purr of the plane - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Are blent in one chorus, attuned to one strain, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —That sighs in the breezes or throbs in the roar - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of the tempest; and ever the cry is for “More.‘’ - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And we men with our axes and horn-covered - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - palms - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Hear the call as a man hears the summons “To - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - arms,” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And forward we plunge with no quarter, no - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - truce, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With axes a-gleam in the realms of King Spruce. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The duffle is packed, and the babies are smacked; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - now wife, for a buss and a hug. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Save a smile ’gainst the spring, for I’m going to - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - bring just all the spruce gum I can lug. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - I’m off! Good-bye! - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - So long! Don’t cry! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - In about a month of Sundays you will see my - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - homely mug. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0054" id="link2H_4_0054"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - HERE’S TO THE STOUT ASH POLE - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Hooray for to-day, and hooray for to-night, and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - forget all the rest of it, boys. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Hold on, Mister Barkeeper, close up your jaw, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - we’re paying for all of this noise. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We won’t mosey out, and we won’t set down, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and you can’t keep a one of us still; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - You can charge, if you want to, so much for a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - yawp; we’ll settle all right in the bill. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For this is our very last evenin’ on earth; the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - last night we’ll be here alive. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To-morrow at six we all cut sticks for the rear of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the West Branch drive. - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - Hooray! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For Seboomook, and rear of the drive. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Oh, bartender, say, can’t you hustle them up? - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Come, push out your reddest of paint, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We’re here for to splatter the carnation on, now - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - blow us for fools if we ain’t! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So set out your varnish for coffins, my boy,— - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - that brand called the “Grave-diggers’ Boast.” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’ve got enough chink—now down with your - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - drink! and I’ll give ye a riverman’s toast. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - While you’re raising up your glasses, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Jest forget the giddy lasses - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That have coaxed away your dollars, and have - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - given you the laugh. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Turn away from them connivers, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And as honest, hearty drivers - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Drink a good, round jorum to the stout ash staff. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - When the girls have filched your cash, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - There is still the hearty ash, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It is waiting at Seboomook for to cheer your - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - foolish soul. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Ah, you know we love it most; and I give - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - you this, my toast, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The river driver’s darling, oh, his long ash pole. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We’ve ridden the gorges on rioting logs, and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - we’ve always swept safe to the land. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So long as we rode with the spikes in our boots, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and the long, limber pole in our hand; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We’ve pried at the jams on the brink of the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - dams, and the pole has stood by like a man, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And then in the dash for our lives in the crash - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the pole braced us up as we ran, - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - Hooray! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As we yelled through the smother and ran. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And when in the bellow of up-ending logs it - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - looked like good-by to our souls - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We rode back to life from out of the strife, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - vaulting high on the end of our poles. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ah, these are the friends that stand by you, my - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - boys: they’re truer than all of the host - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of the fair-spoken gang of the thieves of the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - town! Crowd up here and drink to my toast! - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - The girls were sweeter’n honey - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Till they gathered in our money, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the barkeeps they were pleasant just as - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - long as we could spend. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Now it’s quite another story, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —Case of throwdown! But, by glory, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We can drink this final jorum to our stout old - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - friend. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Though the gang has swiped our cash, there is - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - still the hearty ash, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He is waiting at Seboomook for to cheer your - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - foolish soul. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - After all, we love him most! and he’s still the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - last, loud toast - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —The driver’s honest helper, oh, the long ash - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - pole. - </p> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0055" id="link2H_4_0055"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - MISTER WHAT’S-HIS-NAME OF SEBOOMOOK - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Have you ever heard Seboomook with her April - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - dander up, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - With the amber rushing river gorged to high- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - est drivin’ pitch? - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Have you heard her boom and bellow—rocky - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - lips a-froth with yellow— - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - When she spews and spumes the torrents— - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - oh, the wild and wicked witch? - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - She has menace in her breath, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And she roars the chant of death, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For the victim that she slavers never sees - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - the sun again. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And she clutches at the river, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - With entreaty that it give her - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The morsels for her longing, which are men— - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - men—men! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Here’s a tale to suit the cynic—’tis a satire from - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the woods, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And concerns a certain hero who was hunt- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ing after Fame; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Tis the grim and truthful story of a mighty - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - reach for glory, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - But, alas, he didn’t get it, for we’ve clean - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - forgot his name! - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - He was one of Murphy’s crew, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And he swore that he’d go through - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Where no other West Branch driver ever saved - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - the shirt he wore: - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - For he vowed he’d shoot the gorge - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And allowed that he could dodge - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The Death that knelt a-clutching at the prey - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - the waters bore. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When they said he couldn’t do it, why, he - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - laughed the crowd to scorn, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —Poled across the dimpling shallows with - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - a fierce and hoarse good-by - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —He was Murphy’s top-notch driver, half a bird - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - and one-half diver, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - But the best who brave Seboomook only - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - sound the depths to die. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And they found him miles below; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - But his mother would not know - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The mangled mass Seboomook belched from out - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - her vap’rous throat. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - The first man coming down - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Brought the story out to town, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Referring to the hero as a “dretful reckless - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - goat.” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Then he told the brisk reporters all the grim and - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - grisly tale, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And the deed was dressed in language in a - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - way to bring some fame. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But alas for human glory, the galoot who brought - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - the story, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Remembered all the details, but forgot the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - fellow’s name. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Have you ever heard Seboomook roaring at you - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - in the night, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - With her champing jaws a-frothing in a word- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - less howl of hate? - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Tis a fierce vociferation to compel our admira- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - tion, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - For the chap who struck that rugged blow, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - cross-countered thus by Fate. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - When he lunged his pole at Death, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - When the river sucked his breath, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Seboomook gravely listened when he screamed - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - his humble name; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - For the honor of a foe - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - She would have the people know, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But she vainly dins her message in the deafened - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - ear of Fame. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0056" id="link2H_4_0056"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - HA’NTS OF THE KINGDOM OF SPRUCE - </h2> - <p class="indent20"> - The sheeted ghosts of moated grange - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And misty wraiths are passing strange; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - The gibbering spooks and elfin freaks - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And cackling witches’ maudlin squeaks— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —They have terrified the nations, and have laid - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - the bravest low, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But intimidate a woodsman up in Maine? Why, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - bless you, no! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Merely misty apparitions or some sad ancestral - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - spook - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Serve to terrify a maiden or to warn a death- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - marked duke. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But the P. I. scoffs their terrors, though he’ll - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - never venture loose - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Mongst the ha’nts that roam the woodlands in - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - the weird domains of Spruce. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —He’ll mock the fears of mystic and he’ll scorn - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - the bookish tales - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of the fearsome apparitions of the past, but - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - courage fails - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - In the night when he awakens, all a-shiver in - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - his bunk, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And with ear against the logging hears the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - steady, muffled thunk - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of the hairy fists of monsters, beating there in - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - grisly play, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Horrid things that stroll o’ night-times, never, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - never seen by day, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For he knows that though the spectres of the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - storied past are vain, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There is true and ghostly ravage in the forest - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - depths of Maine. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For even in these days P. I.‘s shake - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - At the great Swamp Swogon of Brassua Lake. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When it blitters and glabbers the long night - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - through, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And shrieks for the souls of the shivering crew. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And all of us know of the witherlick - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That prowls by the shore of the Cup-sup-tic. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of the Side Hill Ranger whose eyeballs gleam - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When the moon hangs gibbous over Abol - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - stream; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Of the Dolorous Demon that moans and calls - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Through the mists of Abol-negassis falls. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And many a woodsman has felt his bunk - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Tossed by the Phantom of Sourdna-hunk. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There’s the Giant Spook who ha’nted Lane’s - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Old wangan camp and rended chains - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Great iron links of the snubbing cable— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As though they were straw—who was even - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - able - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To twist the links in a mighty mat - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With which he bent the forest flat - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - From Nahma-kanta to Depsiconneag - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Acres and acres—league after league; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Striding abroad from peak to dale - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And laying on with his mighty flail. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Oh, fie for the shade of the manored hall, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A fig for a Thing in a grave-creased pall, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —For wraiths that flitter and flutter and sigh, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With flabby limbs and the sunken eye! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The woodsman recks not ye, frail ghosts, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But he knows and he bows to the deep wood’s - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - hosts, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who sound their coming with giant breath, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who mark their passing with storm and death, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who shriek through blow-downs and howl o ’er - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - lakes, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —And he hides and trembles, he shivers and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - shakes - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When he hears the Desperate Demons loose - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - In the weird dominions of grim King Spruce. - </p> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0057" id="link2H_4_0057"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - THE HERO OF THE COONSKIN CAP - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - When the blaze leaps forth from the camp’s - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - great hearth, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And the fitful shadows come and go; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When the ruddy beam lights the deacon-seat - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And the silent faces in a row; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As the storm-gust drags at the sighing eaves - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And moans at the shuddering window-pane, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Some droning voice from a shadowy bank - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Intones a song to the wind’s long strain, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And like the soughing, ebbing blast - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - The gusty chorus bursts and swells; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And then one single, sighing voice - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Drones plaintively the tale it tells. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They’re simple songs, they’re homely songs, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And yet they cling in heart and brain,—— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Those songs of the darkling forest depths, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - These songs of the lumber woods of Maine. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There’s the song of home and the song of love, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And the lilt of battle, bold and free; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There’s the song of the axe in the ringing wood, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And the sighing song of the distant sea. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Yet oft when the choruses are stilled - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Some honest woodsman’s voice can wake - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A tender thrill with the homely song - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Of a nameless hero of Moosehead Lake. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0058" id="link2H_4_0058"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - UP IN MAINE - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - A hero in leggings, he volunteered - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —When the treacherous ice lay black as loam - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - In the melting spring—to risk his life - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And bring to others the news from home. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He bore the mail for the lumber camp, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - The missives for many an anxious man - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who toiled for the ones he loved so well, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - In the wilds of the far Socatean. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He’d fingered each as he studied the names - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And sorted the letters with kindly care; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - While with honest heart of a friend he guessed - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - At the news that the precious notes might - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - hear. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There was one for Kane, and the last had said - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - That his little girl was sorely ill— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Poor man, he had worried the whole long week! - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —And here was one for the Bluenose-Will, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who had left a sweetheart to come to Maine, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And had looked for a line in a homesick way; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And here were a couple from Henry’s wife, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —And one bore “Forward without delay!” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A tiny message to “Pa John Booth” - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Had a cross to show where a rousing smack - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Had been pressed on the paper; and here, alas, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Was a letter fringed with a sombre black. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Freighted with sorrow or bringing the smiles, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Fresh from the homes so far away, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He tucked them all in his coon-skin cap - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And breasted the sleet of the dreary day. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - No one knew how it came about, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - No man witnessed the fight for breath, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When the cruel clutch of the great black lake - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Reached up and dragged him down to death. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But we always knew that his fiercest strength - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Was spent in the supreme flash of life - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When he, poor wanderer, thought alone - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Of the news for others from home and wife. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For, as far on the edge of the broken ice - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - As his arm could reach, when he sank and - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - died, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We found the worn old coon-skin cap - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - With the letters carefully tucked inside. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0059" id="link2H_4_0059"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - A HAIL TO THE HUNTER - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Oh, we’re getting under cover, for the “sport” is - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - on the way, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Pockets bulge with ammunition, and he’s - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - coming down to slay; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - All his cartridges are loaded and his trigger’s on - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the “half,” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he’ll bore the thing that rustles, from a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - deer to Jersey calf. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He will shoot the foaming rapids, and he’ll shoot - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the yearling bull. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the farmer in the bushes—why, he’ll fairly - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - get pumped full. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For the gunner is in earnest, he is coming down - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - to kill, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Shoot you first and then inquire if he hurt - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - you—yes, he will! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For the average city feller he has big game on - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the brain, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And imagines in October there is nothing else in - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Maine! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Therefore some absorbed old farmer cutting corn - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - or pulling beans - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Gets most mightily astonished with a bullet in - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - his jeans. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So, O neighbor, scoot for cover or get out your - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - armor plate, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Johnnie’s got his little rifle and is swooping - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - on the State. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Oh, we’re learning, yes, we’re learning, and I’ll - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - warn you now, my son, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - If you really mean to bore us you must bring a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - bigger gun. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For the farmers have decided they will take no - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - further chance, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And progressive country merchants carry armor- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - plated pants; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Carry shirts of chain-plate metal, lines of coats - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - all bullet-proof, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the helmets they are selling beat a Knight - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - of Malta’s “roof.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So I reckon that the farmers can proceed to get - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - their crops, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Yes, and chuckle while the bullet raps their - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - trouser seats and stops; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the hissing double-B shot as they criss-cross - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - over Maine - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Will excite no more attention than the patter of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the rain. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the calf will fly a signal and the Jersey - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - bull a sign, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the horse a painted banner, reading “Hoss-, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Don’t Shoot; He’s Mine!” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And every fowl who wanders from the safety of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the pen - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Will be taught to cackle shrilly, u Please don’t - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - plug me; I’m a hen.” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Now with all these due precautions we are ready - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - for the gang, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We’ll endure the harmless tumult of the rifles’ - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - crack and bang, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For we’re glad to have you with us—shoot the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - landscape full of holes; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We will back our brand-new armor for to save - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - our precious souls. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - O you feller in the city, those ’ere woods is full - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - of fun, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We’ve got on our iron trousers—so come up - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and bring your gun! - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0060" id="link2H_4_0060"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - HOSSES - </h2> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0061" id="link2H_4_0061"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - THEM OLD RAZOOS AT TOPSHAM TRACK - </h2> - <p class="indent20"> - Won’t you poke your buzzin’ stop-watch, - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Daddy Time, and click ’er back - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - To the days of spider high-wheels on the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - dinky Topsham track? - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - When they raced there in October for per- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - taters, corn, and oats— - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Sometimes paid the purse in shotes— - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Drivers wore their buff’ler coats, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the weather was so juicy that the boys - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - would take a vote - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As to which would drag the better, suh, a sulky - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - or a boat. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Still ’twas fun, when the sun - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Got the moppin’ bus’ness done, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the field went off a-skatin’, half the pelters - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - on the run. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There was’Liza, Old Keturah Ann, and Dough- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - nut Boy and Pat, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Their pedigrees was barnyard, but we didn’t - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - care for that; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So hooray! So hooroo! Oh, ye ought to see - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’em climb, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They was racers, suh, from ’way back—but no - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - matter ’bout the time! - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - There was goers in that pack— - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Look at Toggle-jointed Jack - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With an action like a windmill, but the critter - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - he could rack! - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And I’d like to have him back, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - For I tell you, bub, I stack - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - On the high-wheel, razoo-races of the good old - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Topsham track. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Oh, you oughter seen the send-offs, and you - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - oughter seen the tricks! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For the stretch was chock-a-blocko when they - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - scored ’em down by six. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the starter he would whang-o on a dented - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - strip of tin, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But the drivers never minded ’less he cussed the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - gang like sin. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The hoss-whips that they carried reached away - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - beyond the manes, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And they larruped ’em with chains— - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Tried to lift ’em by the reins. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Twas muscle, suh, that won the race in them - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - old days—not brains! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And you’d think to see the sawin’ and the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - jerkin’ and the h’ists, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The boys they was a-usin’ partent webbin’s - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - made of j’ists. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Their elbows flapped like flyin’ and they yow- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - wowed through the dust, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And ’twarn’t through lack of hollerin’ that ev’ry - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - man warn’t fust. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Twas “Hi-i yah, cut the corners!” and “Hi-i - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - yoop, take the pole!” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Don’t ye keep me in this pocket—let me ont - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - there, darn yer soul!” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Gimme room there! don’t ye pinch me or I’ll - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - bust yer blasted wheel!” - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - “Hi, you sucker, that’s a steal!” - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - “That’s a low-down trick, to squeal!” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Oh, ye want some trouble, do ye? Wal, con- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sarn yer harslet, peel!” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It was tetchy, mister, tetchy, to go sassin’ on ’em - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - back, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When the crowd got interested at the good old - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Topsham track. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There was Savage—Solly Savage—drivin’ - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Adeline Success— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He had speed to sell at auction, but they bribed - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - the cuss, I guess— - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - For he pulled her tight and good— - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Pulled her settin’—then he stood. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Jest got up and braced his feet, suh, and he - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - pulled her all he could. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But the blamed old mare was fussy, wasn’t - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - posted on the deal, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - H’isted up her skeeter-duster and let out one - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - mighty squeal. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - She was leadin’ of ’em easy on the back stretch - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - at the turn, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And there wasn’t no mistakin’ that the race and - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - heat were her’n. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Ginger, ginger! She could go! - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - When she didn’t stub her toe, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Warn’t a horse in all the county stood a show - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - suh, stood a show! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Sol was madder’n snakes in hayin’—had a string - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - of catnip fits, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Just unfastened both the traces and she hauled - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - him by the bits. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And that rank old Adeline - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - She come snortin’ ’crost the line - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Least a dozen lengths a leader, and they soaked - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - old Sol a fine. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Then the feller that had bribed him played tat- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - too on Solly’s face, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And took back the dollar-fifty that he’d give him - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - for the race; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But the boys they licked the feller. Solly got - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - his money back, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For we stood for honest dealing at the good old - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Topsham track. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Now come join me, all old timers,—hip, hooray - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and tiger, too! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For the high-wheel days at Topsham and the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - good old-time razoo— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For the days of spider sulkies and the days of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - solid fun, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When we had a dozen knock-downs ’fore the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - race could be begun; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When ’twas a Huddup, Uncle Eli,” and “H” - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - along there, John, or bust;” - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And the man that finished fust, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Though he argued and he cussed, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Might not always get decisions—’twas accordin’ - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - to the dust; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And ’twas therefore kind of needful, suh, right - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - after ev’ry heat, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To have another fight or so to settle who had - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - beat; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - But they never left a grudge, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Even when they licked the judge. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And we wasn’t all teetotal, still we went it light - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - on “budge,” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For we never took no stronger than some good - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - New England rum— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Jest a mild and pleasant bev’rage—why, the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - deacons they took some! - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Then there wasn’t pedigrees, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And no chin-kerbumping knees,1 - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And an av’rage field would manage jest to keep - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ahead the breeze. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But come join me, ye old-timers, in this pledge - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and one hurrah, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For the spanking, wide-hoofed pelters of the old - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - days of “Hi yah-h-h,” - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - For a feller kinder feels - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - That he’d go without his meals - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Jest to hear some more kiwhoopin’ from the old- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - time trottin’ spiels. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When the wind was in the drivers—nowadays it’s - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - in the wheels. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When the tang was in the weather on those - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - autumn afternoons, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the band got kind of dreamy in those good - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - old-fashioned tunes. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Oh, ’twas awful good to set there on the sunny - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - side the stand, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And to have your girl a-smilin’ and a-snugglin’, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - hand in hand; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And to hear her, when you mentioned getting - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - started pretty soon, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Whisper, blushin’, “What’s the hurry? There - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - will be a lovely moon!” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ah, there’s moisture on my eyelids and my voice - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - is gettin’ hoarse. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But ’tis prob’ly jest the mem’ry of the dust of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - that old course. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Oh, Daddy Time, if somehow you could only - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - click your watch - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And let a feller start again a race he’s made a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - botch, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I wouldn’t ask no better place to start my life - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - anew. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Than on that stand that afternoon beside that - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - girl I knew, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - With my arm behind her back, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And a hidden, bashful smack - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To sweeten all the popcorn balls we munched - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - at Topsham track. - </p> - <p> - <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0007" id="linkimage-0007"> </a> - </p> - <div class="fig" style="width:50%;"> - <img src="images/0205.jpg" alt="0205 " width="100%" /><br /> - </div> - <h5> - <a href="images/0205.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a> - </h5> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0062" id="link2H_4_0062"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - TO HIM WHO DRIV THE STAGE - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Here’s a lyric for the man who’s “druv’ the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - stage,” - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - For the hero of the webbin’s and the whip; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who has faced the wind and weather, fingers - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - calloused by the leather, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And in twenty years has never lost a trip. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Here’s a tribute to the sway-back, spotted hoss, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Who has struggled up the stony, gullied hills; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And his dorsal corrugations show the nature of - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - his rations, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —When he stops, he has to lean against the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - thills. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Here’s obituary notice of the stage, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Chief of hopeless and dilapidated wrecks; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With the cracked enamel awning, and its cush- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - ions ripped and yawning, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the body bumping down upon the “ex.” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Here’s alas and oh, the ancient “buff’ler robe,” - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - With the baldness of a golden-wedding - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - groom; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When the rain and snow descended, then some - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - wondrous smells were blended, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Till the stage was scented very like a tomb. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Here’s a word for all the weary miles he - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - ploughed, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - When the drifts had piled the stage-road - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - mountain high, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When the night shut down around him and the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - north wind sought and found him, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And the tempest chilled his blood and blurred - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - his eye. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There were only country letters in the bags, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And the bags were lank, and yet his word was - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - “Must.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he felt as if the nation knew his fierce - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - determination - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - That he’d have the mail sacks through on time - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - or bust. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Here’s rebuke to those contractors who have - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - skinned - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - The stipends of our Uncle Sam’s star routes, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Till the men who drive the stages hardly get - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - enough in wages - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - To keep their little shavers’ feet in boots. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Here’s a lyric, then, for him who drives the stage; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - When you ride behind his ragged back, don’t - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - frown, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But endure the bang and slamming, for the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - man who’s earned the damning - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Is the contract-sharp who bid the wages down. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0063" id="link2H_4_0063"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - HE BACKED A BLAMED OLD HORSE - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - The neighbors came a-nosing ’round and said the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - horse could trot - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —He oughter up and killed him then, right - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - there upon the spot; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A-killed him, yas, and tanned his hide and made - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - it into boots, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Then worn ’em out a-kicking’round them neigh- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - borly galoots - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who set the bee to buzzing under Ezry Booker’s - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - hat, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And filled him up and chucked him full of non- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sense such as that - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He’d got a hoss ’twas bound to make his ever- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - lasting pile, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And what he got to do, of course, was handle - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - him in style; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That he must bandage up his legs and figger on - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - his feed, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And give him reg’lar exercise and work him out - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - for speed., - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - His knees, his neck, his breast, his thighs, the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - way he lugged his head, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And all his other symptoms looked to “speed,” - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the neighbors said. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So Ezry he just sucked it in, as child-like as - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - could be, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —It cost him thirteen dollars to look np the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - pedigree. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Then one day down to Laneses store he ribbled - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - off a mess - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of names that struck your Uncle Dud as so much - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - foolishness. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “I’ve traced him back,” so Ezry said, “to Mor- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - gan blood ’nd Drew,” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To what’s-his-name and this and that, and which - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and t’other, too. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And Ezry banged the counter, just excited as - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - could be, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A-arguing out the knots and kinks in that there - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - pedigree. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Land sakes! He couldn’t seem to think of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - nothing but that plug: - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Neglected work, let slide his farm, went crazy - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - as a bug. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But there! The neighbors stood around and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - said to go ahead, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And Ezra like a blamed old fool just swallowed - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - all they said. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ef they’d turned to and burned his barn ’twould - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - been a prison crime, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But ’twould have been a better thing for Ezry - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ev’ry time. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He could have got insurance then, but ’twas a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - total loss - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When they torched Ezry up to back - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - A Blamed - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Old - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - Hoss! - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of course he had to put that horse in some good - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - trainer’s hands, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And trainers, as the man who’s tried deereckly - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - understands, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ain’t driving just to take the air, for scenery or - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - for health, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But sort of grab a feller’s leg and milk him for - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - his wealth. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And there were blankets, straps, and girths, and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - bandages and boots; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Pnoomatic sulkies, pads, and shoes, and hoods - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and stable suits; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And lotions, too, and liniments—the best of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - hay and oats, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And Lord knows what of this and that for trot- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ters’ backs and throats! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Then came the entrance fees, of course, and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - travelling expense, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For Ezry lugged that trotter round, and didn’t - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - have the sense - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To know when he was fairly licked, but always - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - would persist - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That “that air hoss another year is going in the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - list!” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The trainer said he’d have him there; the neigh- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - bors thought so, too; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So Ezry pulled his pocketbook and said he’d see - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - him through. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So ’round the circuit went the hoss and, though - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ’tis sad to tell, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “The Flying Dutchman” didn’t fly—he never - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - got a smell. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And when he’d come a-puffing in behind the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - whole blamed crowd - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Then Ezry swore and shook his fist, and argued - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ’round, and vowed - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That all the rest was down on him and had, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - without a doubt, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Just pooled together in a scheme to shut The - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Dutchman out. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The driver said so, anyway, and then, you know, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a few - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Good neighbors took him out one side and said - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - they thought so too. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And so—but land, it’s plain enough how Ezry’s - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - money went - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —He wound up his race-hoss career without a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - blasted cent. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - What’s more, he ain’t the only one who’s sunk - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - his little pot - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - In fubbing ’round from track to track with - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - horses that can’t trot. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —He ain’t the only man in Maine whose ever- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - lasting curse - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Has been some darn-fool neighbors, and his itch - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - to win a purse. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And, as I’ve said, if they’d turned to, and burnt - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - his barn instead - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of cracking up that hoss so much and turning - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Ezry’s head, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He could have got insurance then, but ’twas a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - total loss - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When they torched Ezry up to back - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - A Blamed - </p> - <p class="indent30"> - Old - </p> - <p class="indent35"> - Hoss! - </p> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0064" id="link2H_4_0064"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - B. BROWN—HOSS ORATOR - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - I’ve heerd of Demosthenes—b’longed down in - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Greece, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —And Cicero, too! - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - But ’course, never knew - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A great deal about ’em except through my niece, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who’s tended the ’cademy,—lets on to know - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ’Bout most of the critters who lived years ago, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Who’d talk to a standstill the chaps of their - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - day - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With a broadside of words like a gatling, they - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - say. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And folks knuckle down, and praise up, and - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - kow-tow - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To those hefty old tongue-lashing chaps even - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - now. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So I’m ready for brickbats, and hollers, and howls, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - From the folks of the schools, and from hide- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - bound old owls, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When I shin the high flag-staff of Fame to tear - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - down - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - All colors that flop there for rival renown, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And string up the banner of Bennington Brown. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Don’t think I’ll assert - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - What he knew ever hurt! - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - He was mostly considered an ornery squirt. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He traded old hosses, and cattle, and such, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the sayin’ ’round town was: “Oh, Brown, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - he ain’t much!” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But I read t’other day, in a volyum called - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - “Hints,” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That a speaker is gauged by his gifts to convince. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So I stand on that statement and solemnly swear - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That as a star-actor convincer, I’d dare. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Back Bennington Brown up against the best - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - man - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That ever tongue wrassled, grab holts, catch as - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - can. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Give Cicero Pointer, Directum, or Hanks, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And Brown an old pelter with wobbly shanks, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Just leave ’em an hour, no odds, a clear field, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - No matter how Cicero sputtered and spieled, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’ll bet he would find himself talked to a stop, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And Brown would unload the old rip, even swap! - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - I can see how he’d look - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - When he carefully took - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Old Cic by the gallus with “come-along” hook - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of that gnurly forefinger. And there Cic would - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - stand, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For he wouldn’t be yankin’ away from that hand, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Unless in his desperate efforts to skip - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Cic dodged from his toga, and gave Brown the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - slip. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And it’s likely that Brown would talk something - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - like this: - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I ain’t at all anxious to shift with you, Cic. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Your hoss, I’ll admit, has got plenty of speed, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But you know, Cic, you know that he ain’t what - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - you need. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Outside of a show piece to stand in the barn, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That hoss he ain’t worth, Cic, a tinker’s gol- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - darn. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - What you want is that hoss of mine—want him - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - blame bad, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He don’t need no whip, crackers, cudgel, or gad. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Thout strap, boot, or toeweights, he’s gone out - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and showed - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - His quarters in thirty. He stands lots of road, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And I swow I dunno what I’m sellin’ him for, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —I need him myself. But I’ll sell! Have a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - chaw? - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And as I was sayin’, he’s just what you want;— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Oh, yes, have to own he’s a leetle dite gaunt! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Been a-drivin’ him hard, for he’ll stand lots of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - work, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Never had a sick day, never shows the least - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - quirk. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He’s young: look yourself; jest you roll up his - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - lip; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - By the way, ever smile? I’ve some stuff on my - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - hip. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Now as I was sayin’”—and on, and so on, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Till Cicero’d put his suspenders in pawn, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Hand oyer his steed for a wind-broken brute, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And sling in some golden sestertia to boot. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - I tell you again, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - That of all of the men - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Who can slat the King’s English, I swear by - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - old Ben! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And you’ll never appreciate half of my praise - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Till you’ve stood there yourself in the beller - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - and blaze - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of his thirteen-inch barker, and fust thing you - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - know - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Discover you’ve bought an old bone yard or so, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I hardly expect, O ye hurrying throng, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ye’ll bow to my hero, applaud my rude song, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But sling, if ye will, all your bouquets and praise - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - At the cut-and-dried speakers of pod-auger days, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’ll go by myself and I’ll tenderly crown - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With bay the bald brows of old Bennington; - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Brown. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0065" id="link2H_4_0065"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - “JEST A LIFT” - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Feller was far as the foot of the hill in one of - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - those boggy places, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Had a first-class team, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - As strong as a beam, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But the feller had busted his traces; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the feller gave up when he saw he was - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - stuck. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He borrowed a chaw and consarned his luck, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Admitted he didn’t know what to do; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Sat down on a bank and looked so blue - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He worried the people that passed, and they - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Just turned their noses the other way. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Old Ammi Simmons muttered that he - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Was a dite afraid of his whiffle-tree; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It was slivered some, “and there warn’t much - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - doubt - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ’Twould bust if he pulled that feller out.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And Ira Dorsey, regretful and smug, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Would have helped had he brought his heavier - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - tug, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So he simply beamed a bright “good day” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And clucked to his team and rode away. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So thus they passed for an hour or two; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Many not noticing, while a few - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Assured him they’d like to help him out - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “If the rigging they had was only stout.” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Feller had thought he was up a stump, when - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - along drove Ivory Keller; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Saw the sunken hub, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Yelled, “What’s the troub? - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Don’t ye want a lift there, feller?” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the feller said that he did, you bet, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But said he had begged while he’d set and set, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And he hadn’t discovered a single man - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who’d give him a boost with an extra span. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Why,” Ivory said, “that’s jest my holt. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That off hoss there ain’t more’n a colt, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And it’s hardly an extry pulling pair, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But it’s youm for what it’s worth, I swear. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For I’ve got a home-made sort of a rule - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Won’t kick a cripple nor sass a fool, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And when I find that a feller’s stuck - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —A side-tracked chap down on his luck— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Why, bless you, neighbor, in jest about - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Two shakes of a sheep’s tail I yank him out.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the very next thing that the feller knew - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Old Ivory busted a chain or two, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But the horse and the colt and the gay old man - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Bent to the job till the clogged wheels ran, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Tugged and buckled with hearty will - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Till the cart rolled over the tough old hill. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Then the feller begged him to take some pay, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But the old man chuckled and shoved him - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - away; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Why, bub, see here,” said Ivory Keller, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “I’m a tollable busy son of a gun, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And this is the way I squeeze in fun, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Grab in same’s this and help a feller.” - </p> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0066" id="link2H_4_0066"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - BART OF BRIGHTON - </h2> - <p class="indent20"> - ’Tis the tale of Bart of Brighton—meaning - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Brighton up in Maine; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - It’s the tale of Uncle Bart, sir, and his racker- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - gaited mare; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I have toned it down a little where the language - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - was profane, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - But the rest is as he told it—this remarkable - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - affair. - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - It is very wrong to swear; - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Bart admits the fact—but there! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Times occur when human nature simply is - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - obliged to “r’ar.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “It’s all along o’ givin’ lifts to Uncle Isr’el - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Clark, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —His folks don’t like him stubbin’ round the - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - village after dark,— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And old Mis’ Clark has asked of folks that see - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - him on the road - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To take him in and bring him home, if ’tain’t too - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - much a load. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The day this ’ere affair come off I’d took in - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Uncle Pease, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With a pail of new molasses that he hugged be- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - tween his knees. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We see old Clark ahead of us, a-lugging home - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a gun. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Says I to Pease, ‘Now brace yerhat: we’ll have - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a leetle fun.’ - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ‘Set in behind, old Clark,’ I says. ‘Hop in be- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - hind,’ says I. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ‘Prowidin’ these ’ere tngs don’t bust I’ll - take - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - you like a fly.’ - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He piled aboard, s’r, master quick, there warn’t - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - no need to tease, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And there he sot, the gun straight up, the butt - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - between his knees. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “I’ll tell you ’bout that mare of mine—the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - more you holler ‘whoa,’ - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’ve larnt the whelp to clench her teeth, and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - h’ist her tail—and go! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And when we got clus’ down to Clark’s I thought - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - for jest a sell - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’d make believe we’d run away. So I com- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - menced to yell, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And old man Pease he hugged his knees and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - gaffled to his pail. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And now, my boy, purraps you think that turn- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - out didn’t sail! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He hugged his gun, did Uncle Clark, and set and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - hollered’ Oh!’ - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - While I kep’ nudgin’ Uncle Pease and bellered, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ’Durn ye, whoa!’ - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “I larfed, suh, like a lunytick, I larfed and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - thought ’twas fun - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To look around and see old Clark a-hangin’ to - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - his gun,- - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Eor he was scart plum nigh to death, and so was - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Uncle Pease, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who doubled clus’ above that pail he clenched - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - between his knees. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But while I larfed I clean forgot the Jackson - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - corderoy, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And when we struck that on the run, we got - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - our h’ist, my boy. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Old Clark went up jest like a ball and, next the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - critter knowed, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Come whizzlin’ down, s’r, gun and all, starn- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - fust there in the road. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And when the gun-butt struck the ground, ker- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - whango, off she went, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Both barrels of her, all to onct, and then— - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - wal, ’twas—hell-bent! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The off-rein bust, the wheels r’ared up—the old - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - mare give a heave, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That runaway was on for sure—there warn’t - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - no make-believe; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With t’other rein I geed the mare up-hill to’ards - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Clarkses yard, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —We struck the doorstep, struck her fair, and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - struck her mighty hard! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And long as Lord shall give me breath I shan’t - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - forget the eye - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That old Aunt Clark shot out at me as we went - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - whoopin’ by. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Then I went out and Pease went out and things - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - got kinder blue - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —’Twas sev’ral minits by the clock ’fore this - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - old cock come to. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And there the old mare’d climbed the fence and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - stood inside the gate, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With eyes stuck out and ears stuck back and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - head and tail up straight. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And from the way she looked at me ’twas master - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - evident - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - She wasn’t catchin’ on to what this celebration - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - meant. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And I was clutchin’ jest about two feet of one - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the reins, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - While Uncle Pease was dodderin’ round, a-yellin’ - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ‘Blood and brains!’ - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For, bless my soul, when he had lit he’d run - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - himself head-fust - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Right down in that molasses pail;—he thought - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - his head had bust! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And that the stuff a-runnin’ down and gobbed - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - acrost his face - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Was quarts of gore, and so old Pease had clean - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - give up his case. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And there he stood like some old hen a-drippin’ - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - in the rain, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And hollered stiddy, ‘Blood and brain, I’m - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - dead; oh, blood and brain!’ - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Old Uncle Clark was on his back, a-listening to - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the fuss, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And wonderin’ whuther that old gun had - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - murdered him or us. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Now that’s the way the thing come off. Best - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - is,” concluded Bart, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “They warn’t nobody hurt a mite: three-fifty - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - fixed the cart.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But as he spoke he sought to hide a poultice - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - with his hat - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And curtly said, “Oh, jest a tunk! you see, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Aunt Clark done that.” - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p> - 'Tis the tale of Bart of Brighton—mean- - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - ing Brighton up in Maine, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - —It’s the tale of Uncle Bart, sir, and his - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - racker-gaited mare; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I have toned it down a little where the language - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - was profane, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - But the rest is as he told it, this remarkable - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - affair. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0067" id="link2H_4_0067"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - GOIN’ T’ SCHOOL - </h2> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0068" id="link2H_4_0068"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - THE PAIL I LUGGED TO SCHOOL - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - I know my confession is homely, but Yankees - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - are Yankees clean through, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Their dollars make shells like a turtle’s, but - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - their hearts, my dear fellow, are true - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To the dear, sacred days of their childhood, and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - luxury loses its charm: - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —The only good things are the old things to - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - the fellow brought up on the farm. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And I’d trade all the cheer of a banquet, I’d - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - “swop” them, as grandpap would say, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For the tang of the infinite gusto that came to - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - me, when, after play, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I lifted the battered tin cover and squared my - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - brown arms to assail - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The grub that this hearty young shaver had - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - carried to school in his pail. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - God bless her, that darling old mother! She - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - cherished the honest conceit - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That the groundwork of boyish good morals is, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - first of all, plenty to eat. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And though I went barefoot in summer, with - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - trousers cut over from Jim’s, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We scampered to school every morning with - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - dinner pails filled to their brims. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There were doughnuts, both holed ones and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - twisters, and always a bottle of cream, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And jell cakes and tarts and all such like—oh, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - bow the kids’ eyes used to gleam! - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I pitied the poor little shavers who slunk to a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - corner to eat, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who brought only bread and potatoes and never - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - had anything sweet; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And some carried grub in their pockets, and hid - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - with a child’s bitter shame - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To choke down the crust and the cooky before - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - some rude fun-maker came. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But out of such manhood’s successes of which - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - I’ve a right to be proud - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There never was one I’ve uncovered, with such - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a delight, to the crowd - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As that pail with its bountiful dinner, each - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - cake and each jelly-tipped tart - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - A dumb but an eloquent voucher of a thoughtful - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - and true mother-heart. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And, neighbors, from things I have noted, I - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - think it’s a pretty good rule - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To size up a mother’s devotion by the grub her - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - child carries to school. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Those savors that float from my childhood dull - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - all the delights of my board; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The good things from mother’s old kitchen my - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - dollars can never afford, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And I’d trade all these delicate dishes—a clean - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - unconditional sale— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For the tang of the infinite gusto from the depths - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - of that old dinner pail. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0069" id="link2H_4_0069"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - THE PADDYWHACKS - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Mother says it’s something fearful—way this - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - pesky young one acts, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And she’s called the Johnson children by the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - name of “Paddywhacks.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And she keeps a-givin’ orders that I musn’t have - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - ’em round; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But she thinks that Satan’s in me, for she says - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’m always bound - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To go mixing with ’em somehow when she lets - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - me out to play; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And you bet I’m going to see ’em if I have to - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - run away. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’ll never wear them blamed dude clothes - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Nor boots with patent leather toes. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I like to stomp and scoff and kick - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And holler round. It makes me sick - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To have that Reynolds youngster call, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He’s primped up like a big wax doll., - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - My mother says he’s just too sweet, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He always keeps his clothes so neat, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And wishes I’d spruce up a bit; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - What! Look like that? Well, I guess not, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —They’ve duty mugs and ragged backs, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But just give me them Paddywhacks. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They can catch ye lots of suckers—know the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - brook and shortest cut; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They have got a robber’s dungeon and a nice - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - browse Injun hut. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They can scrape ye lots of sly ver—juicy stuff - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - from little pines, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - They can make a willow whistle, and they’re - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - posted on the signs - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of woodchucks, coons, and squirrels; and they - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - own a brindle houn’, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And they get to going barefoot first of any boys - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - in town. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That’s the stuff—oh, that’s the stuff, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Let a kid kick up and scuff! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Not go round with mouth all screwed - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Goody, like that Reynolds dude. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Say, I’ll push him once, if he - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Comes a-making mouths at me. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Yah, yah! See them corkscrew curls! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That’s right, let him play with girls. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Let him wear his ruffled shirt - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Give me one that won’t show dirt. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’m the chap, you bet, that stacks - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Up ’long-side them Paddywhacks. - </p> - <p> - <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0070" id="link2H_4_0070"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - THAT MAYBASKET FOR MABEL FRY - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - Mother rigged the little basket, for I’d teased a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - day or so, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —I was just a little shaver, and ’twas years and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - years ago,— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And I blushed while I was teasing; I was young, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - so mother said, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To be running ’round with baskets when I ought - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - to be in bed. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But she trimmed me up the basket and she asked - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - me whom ’twas for; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Ah, I didn’t dare to tell her; thought I’d better - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - hold my jaw, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For I wanted it for Mabel, not for Minnie on the - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Hill; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —For a maid in rags and tatters, not a maid in - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - lace and frill. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Minnie rode behind her ponies; Mabel had a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - wooden cart, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But to Mabel went the homage of my foolish - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - boyish heart. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - True, her gown was frayed and ragged, and her - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - folks were sort of low, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And her brothers swore like demons,” and they - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - tagged where ’er we’d go, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And my father always scolded me and drove - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - them all away - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Whene ’er they followed Mabel if I asked her np - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - to play. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But I saw not Mabel’s tatters; for I loved her - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sun-browned face, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And I’d lick the kid that didn’t say she was the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - handsomest girl in the place. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Tis a tricksy prank that memory plays - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Taking me back to those early days; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But the purest affection the heart can hold - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Is the honest love of a nine-year-old. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It isn’t checked by the five-barred gate - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of worldly prudence and real estate. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And that, my friend, was the reason why - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I hung my basket to Mabel Fry, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - She’d a tattered dress, and a pink great toe - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Stuck out through her shoe, but—I loved - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - her so—. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Though that was years and years ago. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /><a name="linkimage-0008" id="linkimage-0008"> </a> - </p> - <div class="fig" style="width:50%;"> - <img src="images/0235.jpg" alt="0235 " width="100%" /><br /> - </div> - <h5> - <a href="images/0235.jpg"><img src="images/enlarge.jpg" alt="" /> </a> - </h5> - <p class="indent15"> - I sat down and looked at mother while she - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - trimmed the pasteboard box, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - While she crimped the crinkly paper till it fluffed - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - like curly locks; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Till she fastened on the streamers, red and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - yellow, white and blue, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And she held it up and twirled it, saying, “Sonny, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - will that do?” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Would it do? It was a beauty! ’Twas a gem - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - in basket art; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And I piled it full of candy, put on top a big - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - red heart. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Then as soon as dusk could hide me I escaped - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - my mother’s eyes, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And I hung the grand creation on the door-latch - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - of the Frys. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - How my youthful limbs were shaking! how my - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - dizzy noddle rocked! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And my heart was pounding louder than my - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - knuckles when I knocked. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - So she caught me at the corner, for you see I - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - didn’t fly, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Might have been I was so frightened; then - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - perhaps I didn’t try. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When I swung around to meet her, neither of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - us dared to stir. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Mabel stood and watched the sidewalk and I - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - stood and gawked at her, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - While those little imps of brothers gobbled every - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - blessed mite - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of the candy in that basket—Mabel didn’t get a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - bite. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But I saved the little basket, gave each kid a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - hearty cuff, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And I tried to comfort Mabel; told her she was - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sweet enough, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Said she didn’t need the candy; but my little - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - Mabel sighed, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Blushed and whispered that she wondered how - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I knew—I hadn’t tried— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To-day—to-day from a long-gone May - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - This tricksy memory strays my way. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Just for a moment I close my eyes - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And see that cracked old door of Fry’s. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And my heart is brushed, as the noon day - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - trees - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Are touched with the whisp of the strolling - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - breeze. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Alas, that the heart mayn’t always hold - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The honest love of the nine-year-old. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I haven’t a doubt you’re dreaming now - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of some frank maid with an honest brow - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who chose you out for she loved you so, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When Worth got “Yes,” and Wealth got - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “No.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But that was years and years ago. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0071" id="link2H_4_0071"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - THE MYSTIC BAND - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - I’ve joined the orders that came our way, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Been sort of a “jiner,” as one would say,— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And I’ve bucked the goat, and trudged the sands, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And taken the oaths in most secret bands, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Till now at last I seldom slip - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - On test or password, sign or grip. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And every day when I walk the street - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I give the signs to the men I meet. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There’s the S. of T. and the K. of P. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the League of the Order of Liberty; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Masons and Odd Fellows string along, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Thicker than flies in the moving throng. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Till it seems that every fellow could - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Give you a sign of a brotherhood. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Oh, I like to meet them, every one, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - From the Daughter of Peace to a Son of a Gun. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - But I can’t quite feel the same delight - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As I used to when, some summer night, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’d take a few of the high degrees - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - In the O. K. K. B. W. P’s. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We had no lodge-room with locks and bars - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Our hall was the dome ’neath the winking - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - stars; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - No lofty dais and tufted throne, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - No crown or symbol or altar stone, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - No velvet carpets or flashing lights - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Were needed there in those old-time rites; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There was only the light from some honest eyes - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Up-raised to the velvet evening skies; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the only crown was the flower wreath - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Set light on the curling locks beneath, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the mystic grip was the tender squeeze - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of our hands as we roamed past the orchard - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - trees; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the head of the lodge was an elfin chap - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With roses heaped in his dimpled lap. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —With wings a-spread and his locks a-blow, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the wand of his office a silver bow. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He welcomed the timid neophytes. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And into the hearts of his pure delights - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - He led each happy candidate - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who breathed Love’s password at the gate, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And happy he who sought degrees - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - In the O. K. K. B. W. P’s. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Tis just a page from the dear conceit - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That makes the volume of school life sweet; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —A bit of a jest from the callow days - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - When we bashfully trudged the self-same ways - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - As the girls from the evening meeting took, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And we carried their capes and the singing-book. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Sauntered along the dim old lanes - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With chirrup and chatter and gay refrains, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Shouting “Good-nights” as here and there, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Pausing by gate or stile, a pair - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Loitered a bit on the threshold’s stone - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For a sweet and fond good-night of their own. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - It irks me, friend, that I must profane - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The oath of the order and voice that chain - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of mystic letters: yet ’twere not kind - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - To take you thus far and leave you blind. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And I’ll whisper, you know, just heart to heart, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - ’Twas “One Kind Kiss Before We Part,” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The mystic grip was a warm hand-press, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The sign and the test a swift caress, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And the dearest and sweetest of Used-to-be’s - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Were the O. K. K. B. W. P’s. - </p> - <p> - <br /> <br /><br /> - </p> - <hr /> - <p> - <a name="link2H_4_0072" id="link2H_4_0072"> </a> - </p> - <div style="height: 4em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - <h2> - AT THE OLD “GOOL” - </h2> - <p class="indent15"> - “Ten, ten and a double ten, forty-five and then - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - fifteen!” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Stand you here, old friend of mine, close your - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - eyes the while you lean - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Your silvered hair against the wood that’s silvered - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - too, by sun and rain, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —The butt of storms as well as we,—old aliens - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - crawling back to Maine. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - The driving sleet, the drifting snows have filched - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - away the vivid red - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That matched, as I remember it, the flaming top- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - knot on your head. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And this—so gaunt, so bent, so small—it seems, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - alas, a wooden ghost - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of what it was when it was “gool”: the school- - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - house’s old red hitching-post! - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And ah, old friend, to lean your brow upon its - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - crest you have to stoop; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —You had to stretch to reach its top in those - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - old days of hide-and-coop. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Ten, ten and a double ten,” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That’s the way we counted then; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —Counted hundreds rapidly, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Begged the happy days to flee. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Moments were not precious then. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - What we hoard to-day as men, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Then we flung in careless way; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Counting life as when at play; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Blinding” at the old red post, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - We strove to see who’d count the most. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Forty-five and then fifteen,—” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Lavish then: ah, now we glean - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - On our bended knees as men - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - What we flung uncounted then. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Friend, old friend, the past troops back - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - With all its smiles and all its sighs, - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - When I was “It,” - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - And the world was lit - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - By the star-shine of two soft brown eyes. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - “Ten, ten, and a double ten, forty-five and then - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - fifteen!” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - That talisman of boyhood days has brought a - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - sorrow that is keen. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And yet there’s joy along with pain; let me bow - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - my head here too, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - And here with brow upon this wood I’ll tell you - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - what you never knew. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - You’ve asked me many times, old friend, the - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - secret of an unwed life; - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’ll tell you now: I loved but once; that girl - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - loved you; she was your wife. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I loved her in those boyhood days, but in Life’s - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - game of counting out - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Fate’s happy finger stretched to you, and I— - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - poor awkward, bashful lout— - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Just stepped aside. But ’twas all right! I’m - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - not the sort to curse and whine, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - My joy has been that she was yours, so long as - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - she could not be mine. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - —My joy, old friend, is now to say, as here we - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - clasp this worn old post, - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - There is no heart-burn in my past, no shimmer of - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - a jealous ghost. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - For boyhood’s lesson taught me this: ’Tis only - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - some egregious fool - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Who rails at Fate and storms the skies because - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - some better man “tags gool.” - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - I’ve been content to stand there, friend, while - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - one by one the eager troop - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Of boyhood’s chums have won their goal in Life’s - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - more earnest hide-and-coop. - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - Thank God, old chum, we still clasp hands and - </p> - <p class="indent20"> - pledge again our boyhood ties. - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - Though I’ve been “It,” - </p> - <p class="indent25"> - And your world is lit - </p> - <p class="indent15"> - By the star-shine of her soft brown eyes. - </p> - <p> - <br /> - </p> - <div style="height: 6em;"> - <br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /> - </div> - - - - - - - -<pre> - - - - - -End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Up In Maine, by Holman F. 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