diff options
Diffstat (limited to 'old/files/relative.htm')
| -rw-r--r-- | old/files/relative.htm | 37656 |
1 files changed, 37656 insertions, 0 deletions
diff --git a/old/files/relative.htm b/old/files/relative.htm new file mode 100644 index 0000000..9b93485 --- /dev/null +++ b/old/files/relative.htm @@ -0,0 +1,37656 @@ +<?xml version="1.0" encoding="iso-8859-1"?> + +<!DOCTYPE html + PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Strict//EN" + "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-strict.dtd" > + +<html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml"> + <head> + <title> + THE TALES AND NOVELS OF LA FONTAINE + </title> + <style type="text/css"> + <!-- + body { margin:15%; background:#faebd0; text-align:justify} + P { text-indent: 1em; margin-top: .25em; margin-bottom: .25em; } + H1,H2,H3,H4,H5,H6 { text-align: center; margin-left: 15%; margin-right: 15%; } + hr { width: 50%; text-align: center;} + .foot { margin-left: 20%; margin-right: 20%; text-align: justify; text-indent: -3em; font-size: 90%; } + blockquote {font-size: 97%; font-style: italic; margin-left: 10%; margin-right: 10%;} + .mynote {background-color: #DDE; color: #000; padding: .5em; margin-left: 10%; margin-right: 10%; font-family: sans-serif; font-size: 95%;} + .toc { margin-left: 10%; margin-bottom: .75em;} + .toc2 { margin-left: 20%;} + .indent5 { margin-left: 5%;} + .indent10 { margin-left: 10%;} + .indent15 { margin-left: 15%;} + .indent20 { margin-left: 20%;} + .indent30 { margin-left: 30%;} + div.fig { display:block; margin:0 auto; text-align:center; } + div.middle { margin-left: 20%; margin-right: 20%; text-align: justify; } + .figleft {float: left; margin-left: 0%; margin-right: 1%;} + .figright {float: right; margin-right: 0%; margin-left: 1%;} + .pagenum {display:inline; font-size: 100%; font-style:normal; + margin: 0; padding: 0; position: absolute; right: 1%; + text-align: right;} + .side { float: left; font-size: 75%; width: 25%; padding-left: 0.8em; + border-left: dashed thin; text-align: left; + text-indent: 0; font-weight: bold; font-style: italic; + font-weight: bold; color: black; background: #eeeeee; border: solid 1px;} + p.pfirst, p.noindent {text-indent: 0} + span.dropcap { float: left; margin: 0 0.1em 0 0; line-height: 0.8 } + pre { font-style: italic; font-size: 90%; margin-left: 10%;} + --> +</style> + </head> + <body> + <h2> + THE TALES AND NOVELS OF LA FONTAINE + </h2> +<pre xml:space="preserve"> + +Project Gutenberg's The Tales and Novels, Complete, by Jean de La Fontaine + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.net + + +Title: The Tales and Novels, Complete + +Author: Jean de La Fontaine + +Illustrators: Eisen, Lenart, Boudler, Pater and Others + +Release Date: September 21, 2004 [EBook #5300] +Last Updated: July 25, 2014 + +Language: English + +Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 + +*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE TALES AND NOVELS, COMPLETE *** + + + + +Produced by David Widger + + + + + +</pre> + <p> + <br /><br /> + </p> + <hr /> + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h1> + THE TALES AND NOVELS + </h1> + <h1> + OF + </h1> + <h1> + J. DE LA FONTAINE + </h1> + < + +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/frontpiece.jpg" alt="frontpiece " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0027m.jpg" alt="0027m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0027.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0015m.jpg" alt="0015m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0015.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p class="toc"> + <big><b>CONTENTS</b></big> + </p> + <p> + <br /> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#FONTAINE_LIFE">LA FONTAINE'S LIFE</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#PREFACE">PREFACE</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Joconde">Joconde</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Cudgelled_and">The Cudgelled and Contented Cuckold</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Husband_Confessor">The Husband Confessor</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Cobbler">The Cobbler</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Peasant_and">The Peasant and His Angry Lord</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Muleteer">The Muleteer</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Servant_Girl">The Servant Girl Justified</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Three_Gossips">The Three Gossips' Wager</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Old_Man_Calendar">The Old Man's Calendar</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Avaricious_Wife">The Avaricious Wife and Tricking Gallant</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Jealous_Husband">The Jealous Husband</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Gascon_Punished">The Gascon Punished</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Princess_Bethrothed">The Princess Betrothed to the King of + Garba</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Magick_Cup">The Magick Cup</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Falcon">The Falcon</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Little_Dog">The Little Dog</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Eel_Pie">The Eel Pie</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Magnificent">The Magnificent</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Ephesian_Matron">The Ephesian Matron</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Belphegor">Belphegor</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Little_Bell">The Little Bell</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Glutton">The Glutton</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Two_Friends">The Two Friends</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Country_Justice">The Country Justice</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Alice_Sick">Alice Sick</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Kiss_Returned">The Kiss Returned</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Sister_Jane">Sister Jane</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#An_Imitation">An Imitation of Anacreon</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Another_Imitation">Another Imitation of Anacreon</a> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#PREFACE_2">PREFACE</a> (To The Second Book) + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Friar_Phillip">Friar Philip's Geese</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Richard_Minutolo">Richard Minutolo</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Monks_of_Catalonia">The Monks of Catalonia</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Cradle">The Cradle</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#St._Julian">St. Julian's Prayer</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Countryman_Who">The Countryman Who Sought His Calf</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Hans_Carvel">Hans Carvel's Ring</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Hermit">The Hermit</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Convent_Gardener">The Convent Gardener of Lamporechio</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Mandrake">The Mandrake</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Rhemese">The Rhemese</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Amorous_Courtesan">The Amorous Courtesan</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Nicaise">Nicaise</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Progress_of_Wit">The Progress of Wit</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Sick_Abbess">The Sick Abbess</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Truckers">The Truckers</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Case_of_Conscience">The Case of Conscience</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Devil_of_Pope">The Devil of Pope-fig Island</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Feronde">Feronde</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Psalter">The Psalter</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#King_Candaules">King Candaules and the Doctor of Laws</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Devil_in_Hell">The Devil in Hell</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#peter">Neighbour Peter's Mare</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Spectacles">The Spectacles</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Bucking_Tub">The Bucking Tub</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Impossible_Thing">The Impossible Thing</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Picture">The Picture</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Pack-Saddle">The Pack-Saddle</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Earmaker">The Ear-maker, and the Mould-mender</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#River_Scamander">The River Scamander</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Confidant_Without">The Confidant Without Knowing It, or the + Stratagem</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Clyster">The Clyster</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Indiscreet_Confession">The Indiscreet Confession</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Contract">The Contract</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Quid_Pro_Quo">The Quid Pro Quo, or the Mistakes</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Dress-Maker">The Dress-maker</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Gascon">The Gascon</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Pitcher">The Pitcher</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#To_Promise">To Promise is One Thing, to Keep It, Another</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Nightingale">The Nightingale</a> + </p> + <p> + <a href="#Epitaph">Epitaph of La Fontaine</a> + </p> + + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0029m.jpg" alt="0029m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0029.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <h2> + LIFE OF + </h2> + <h2> + <a name="FONTAINE_LIFE" id="FONTAINE_LIFE"></a>JEAN DE LA FONTAINE + </h2> + <p> + <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + Jean de La Fontaine was born on the 8th of July, 1621, at Chateau-Thierry, + and his family held a respectable position there. + </p> + <p> + His education was neglected, but he had received that genius which makes + amends for all. While still young the tedium of society led him into + retirement, from which a taste for independence afterwards withdrew him. + </p> + <p> + He had reached the age of twenty-two, when a few sounds from the lyre of + Malherbe, heard by accident, awoke in him the muse which slept. + </p> + <p> + He soon became acquainted with the best models: Pheedrus, Virgil, Horace + and Terence amongst the Latins; Plutarch, Homer and Plato, amongst the + Greeks; Rabelais, Marot and d'Urfe, amongst the French; Tasso, Ariosto and + Boccaccio, amongst the Italians. + </p> + <p> + He married, in compliance with the wishes of his family, a beautiful, + witty and chaste woman, who drove him to despair. + </p> + <p> + He was sought after and cherished by all distinguished men of letters. But + it was two Ladies who kept him from experiencing the pangs of poverty. + </p> + <p> + La Fontaine, if there remain anything of thee, and if it be permitted to + thee for a moment to soar above all time; see the names of La Sabliere and + of Hervard pass with thine to the ages to come! + </p> + <p> + The life of La Fontaine was, so to speak, only one of continual + distraction. In the midst of society, he was absent from it. Regarded + almost as an imbecile by the crowd, this clever author, this amiable man, + only permitted himself to be seen at intervals and by friends. + </p> + <p> + He had few books and few friends. + </p> + <p> + Amongst a large number of works that he has left, everyone knows his + fables and his tales, and the circumstances of his life are written in a + hundred places. + </p> + <p> + He died on the 16th of March, 1695. + </p> + <p> + Let us keep silence about his last moments, for fear of irritating those + who never forgive. + </p> + <p> + His fellow-citizens honour him in his posterity to this day. + </p> + <p> + Long after his death, foreigners went to visit the room which he had + occupied. + </p> + <p> + Once a year, I shall go to visit his tomb. + </p> + <p> + On that day, I shall tear up a fable of La Mothe, a tale of Vergier, or + several of the best pages of Grecourt. + </p> + <p> + He was buried in the cemetery of Saint-Joseph, by the side of Moliere. + </p> + <p> + That spot will always be held sacred by poets and people of taste. <br /><br /> + </p> + <hr /> + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="PREFACE" id="PREFACE"></a>THE AUTHOR'S PREFACE + </h2> + <h2> + TO THE FIRST VOLUME OF THESE TALES + </h2> + <p> + <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + I had resolved not to consent to the printing of these Tales, until after + I had joined to them those of Boccaccio, which are those most to my taste; + but several persons have advised me to produce at once what I have + remaining of these trifles, in order to prevent from cooling the curiosity + to see them, which is still in its first ardour. I gave way to this advice + without much difficulty, and I have thought well to profit by the + occasion. Not only is that permitted me, but it would be vanity on my part + to despise such an advantage. It has sufficed me to wish that no one + should be imposed upon in my favour, and to follow a road contrary to that + of certain persons, who only make friends in order to gain voices in their + favour by their means; creatures of the Cabal, very different from that + Spaniard who prided himself on being the son of his own works. Although I + may still be as much in want of these artifices as any other person, I + cannot bring myself to resolve to employ them; however I shall accommodate + myself if possible to the taste of the times, instructed as I am by my own + experience, that there is nothing which is more necessary. Indeed one + cannot say that all seasons are suitable for all classes of books. We have + seen the Roundelays, the Metamorphoses, the Crambos, reign one after + another. At present, these gallantries are out of date and nobody cares + about them: so certain is it that what pleases at one time may not please + at another! It only belongs to works of truly solid merit and sovereign + beauty, to be well received by all minds and in all ages, without + possessing any other passport than the sole merit with which they are + filled. As mine are so far distant from such a high degree of perfection, + prudence advises that I should keep them in my cabinet unless I choose + well my own time for producing them. This is what I have done, or what I + have tried to do in this edition, in which I have only added new Tales, + because it seemed to me that people were prepared to take pleasure in + them. There are some which I have extended, and others which I have + abridged, only for the sake of diversifying them and making them less + tedious. But I am occupying myself over matters about which perhaps people + will take no notice, whilst I have reason to apprehend much more important + objections. There are only two principal ones which can be made against + me; the one that this book is licentious; the other that it does not + sufficiently spare the fair sex. With regard to the first, I say boldly + that the nature of what is understood as a tale decided that it should be + so, it being an indispensable law according to Horace, or rather according + to reason and common sense, that one must conform one's self to the nature + of the things about which one writes. Now, that I should be permitted to + write about these as so many others have done and with success I do not + believe it can be doubted; and people cannot condemn me for so doing, + without also condemning Ariosto before me and the Ancients before Ariosto. + It may be said that I should have done better to have suppressed certain + details, or at least to have disguised them. Nothing was more easy, but it + would have weakened the tale and taken away some of its charm: So much + circumspection is only necessary in works which promise great discretion + from the beginning, either by their subject or by the manner in which they + are treated. I confess that it is necessary to keep within certain limits, + and that the narrowest are the best; also it must be allowed me that to be + too scrupulous would spoil all. He who would wish to reduce Boccaccio to + the same modesty as Virgil, would assuredly produce nothing worth having, + and would sin against the laws of propriety by setting himself the task to + observe them. For in order that one may not make a mistake in matters of + verse and prose, extreme modesty and propriety are two very different + things. Cicero makes the latter consist in saying what is appropriate one + should say, considering the place, the time, and the persons to whom one + is speaking. This principle once admitted, it is not a fault of judgment + to entertain the people of to-day with Tales which are a little broad. + Neither do I sin in that against morality. If there is anything in our + writings which is capable of making an impression on the mind, it is by no + means the gaiety of these Tales; it passes off lightly; I should rather + fear a tranquil melancholy, into which the most chaste and modest novels + are very capable of plunging us, and which is a great preparation for + love. As to the second objection, by which people reproach me that this + book does wrong to womankind, they would be right if I were speaking + seriously: but who does not see that this is all in jest, and consequently + cannot injure? We must not be afraid on that account that marriages in the + future will be less frequent, and husbands more on their guard. It may + still be objected that these Tales are unfounded or that they have + everywhere a foundation easy to destroy; in short that they are + absurdities and have not the least tinge of probability. I reply in a few + words that I have my authorities: and besides it is neither truth nor + probability which makes the beauty and the charm of these Tales: it is + only the manner of telling them. These are the principal points on which I + have thought it necessary to defend myself. I abandon the rest to the + censors; the more so as it would be an infinite undertaking to pretend to + reply to all. Criticism never stops short nor ever wants for subjects on + which to exercise itself: even if those I am able to foresee were taken + from it, it would soon have discovered others. <br /><br /> + </p> + <hr /> + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h1> + TALES AND NOVELS + </h1> + <h1> + OF + </h1> + <h1> + J. DE LA FONTAINE + </h1> + + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + + + + <h2> + <a name="Joconde" id="Joconde"></a>JOCONDE + </h2><p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">I</span>N Lombardy's fair land, in days of yore, + </p> + <p> + Once dwelt a prince, of youthful charms, a store; + </p> + <p> + Each FAIR, with anxious look, his favours sought, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry heart within his net was caught. + </p> + <p> + Quite proud of beauteous form and smart address, + </p> + <p> + In which the world was led to acquiesce, + </p> + <p> + He cried one day, while ALL attention paid, + </p> + <p> + I'll bet a million, Nature never made + </p> + <p> + Beneath the sun, another man like me, + </p> + <p> + Whose symmetry with mine can well agree. + </p> + <p> + If such exist, and here will come, I swear + </p> + <p> + I'll show him ev'ry lib'ral princely care. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A noble Roman, who the challenge heard, + </p> + <p> + This answer gave the king his soul preferr'd + </p> + <p> + —Great prince, if you would see a handsome man, + </p> + <p> + To have my brother here should be your plan; + </p> + <p> + A frame more perfect Nature never gave; + </p> + <p> + But this to prove, your courtly dames I crave; + </p> + <p> + May judge the fact, when I'm convinc'd they'll find: + </p> + <p> + Like you, the youth will please all womankind; + </p> + <p> + And since so many sweets at once may cloy, + </p> + <p> + 'Twere well to have a partner in your joy. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE king, surpris'd, expressed a wish to view + </p> + <p> + This brother, form'd by lines so very true; + </p> + <p> + We'll see, said he, if here his charms divine + </p> + <p> + Attract the heart of ev'ry nymph, like mine; + </p> + <p> + And should success attend our am'rous lord, + </p> + <p> + To you, my friend, full credit we'll accord. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AWAY the Roman flew, Joconde to get, + </p> + <p> + (So nam'd was he in whom these features met;) + </p> + <p> + 'Midst woods and lawns, retir'd from city strife, + </p> + <p> + And lately wedded to a beauteous wife; + </p> + <p> + If bless'd, I know not; but with such a fair, + </p> + <p> + On him must rest the folly to despair. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE Roman courtier came, his business told + </p> + <p> + The brilliant offers from the monarch bold; + </p> + <p> + His mission had success, but still the youth + </p> + <p> + Distraction felt, which 'gan to shake his truth; + </p> + <p> + A pow'rful monarch's favour there he view'd; + </p> + <p> + A partner here, with melting tears bedew'd; + </p> + <p> + And while he wavered on the painful choice, + </p> + <p> + She thus address'd her spouse with plaintive voice: <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0032m.jpg" alt="0032m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0032.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + CAN you, Joconde, so truly cruel prove, + </p> + <p> + To quit my fervent love in courts to move? + </p> + <p> + The promises of kings are airy dreams, + </p> + <p> + And scarcely last beyond the day's extremes + </p> + <p> + By watchful, anxious care alone retain'd, + </p> + <p> + And lost, through mere caprice, as soon as gain'd. + </p> + <p> + If weary of my charms, alas! you feel, + </p> + <p> + Still think, my love, what joys these woods conceal; + </p> + <p> + Here dwell around tranquillity and ease; + </p> + <p> + The streams' soft murmurs, and the balmy breeze, + </p> + <p> + Invite to sleep; these vales where breathe the doves, + </p> + <p> + All, all, my dear Joconde, renew our loves; + </p> + <p> + You laugh!—Ah! cruel, go, expose thy charms, + </p> + <p> + Grim death will quickly spare me these alarms! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + JOCONDE'S reply our records ne'er relate, + </p> + <p> + Nor what he did, nor how he left his mate; + </p> + <p> + And since contemp'raries decline the task; + </p> + <p> + 'Twere folly, such details of me to ask. + </p> + <p> + We're told, howe'er, when ready to depart, + </p> + <p> + With flowing tears she press'd him to her heart; + </p> + <p> + And on his arm a brilliant bracelet plac'd, + </p> + <p> + With hair around her picture nicely trac'd; + </p> + <p> + This guard in full remembrance of my love, + </p> + <p> + She cried;—then clasped her hands to pow'rs above. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TO see such dire distress, and poignant grief, + </p> + <p> + Might lead to think, soon death would bring relief; + </p> + <p> + But I, who know full well the female mind, + </p> + <p> + At best oft doubt affliction of the kind. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + JOCONDE set out at length; but that same morn; + </p> + <p> + As on he mov'd, his soul with anguish torn, + </p> + <p> + He found the picture he had quite forgot, + </p> + <p> + Then turn'd his steed, and back began to trot. + </p> + <p> + While musing what excuse to make his mate, + </p> + <p> + At home he soon arriv'd, and op'd the gate; + </p> + <p> + Alighted unobserv'd, ran up the stairs; + </p> + <p> + And ent'ring to the lady unawares, + </p> + <p> + He found this darling rib, so full of charms; + </p> + <p> + Intwin'd within a valet's brawny arms! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + 'MIDST first emotions of the husband's ire; + </p> + <p> + To stab them while asleep he felt desire; + </p> + <p> + Howe'er, he nothing did; the courteous wight; + </p> + <p> + In this dilemma, clearly acted right; + </p> + <p> + The less of such misfortunes said is best; + </p> + <p> + 'Twere well the soul of feeling to divest; + </p> + <p> + Their lives, through pity, or prudential care; + </p> + <p> + With much reluctance, he was led to spare; + </p> + <p> + Asleep he left the pair, for if awake, + </p> + <p> + In honour, he a diff'rent step would take.— + </p> + <p> + Had any smart gallant supplied my place, + </p> + <p> + Said he, I might put up with this disgrace; + </p> + <p> + But naught consoles the thought of such a beast; + </p> + <p> + Dan Cupid wantons, or is blind at least; + </p> + <p> + A bet, or some such whim, induc'd the god, + </p> + <p> + To give his sanction to amours so odd. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS perfidy Joconde so much dismay'd; + </p> + <p> + His spirits droop'd, his lilies 'gan to fade; + </p> + <p> + No more he look'd the charmer he had been; + </p> + <p> + And when the court's gay dames his face had seen; + </p> + <p> + They cried, Is this the beauty, we were told, + </p> + <p> + Would captivate each heart, or young or old? + </p> + <p> + Why, he's the jaundice; ev'ry view displays + </p> + <p> + The mien of one,—just fasted forty days! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0036m.jpg" alt="0036m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0036.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + WITH secret pleasure, this, Astolphus learn'd; + </p> + <p> + The Roman, for his brother, risks discern'd, + </p> + <p> + Whose secret griefs were carefully conceal'd, + </p> + <p> + (And these Joconde could never wish reveal'd;) + </p> + <p> + Yet, spite of gloomy looks and hollow eyes, + </p> + <p> + His graceful features pierc'd the wan disguise, + </p> + <p> + Which fail'd to please, alone through want of life, + </p> + <p> + Destroy'd by thinking on a guilty wife. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE god of love, in pity to our swain, + </p> + <p> + At last revok'd BLACK CARE'S corroding reign; + </p> + <p> + For, doubtless, in his views he oft was cross'd, + </p> + <p> + While such a lover to the world was lost. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE hero of our tale, at length, we find + </p> + <p> + Was well rewarded: LOVE again proved kind; + </p> + <p> + For, musing as he walk'd alone one day, + </p> + <p> + And pass'd a gall'ry, (held a secret way,) + </p> + <p> + A voice in plaintive accents caught his ear, + </p> + <p> + And from the neighb'ring closet came, 'twas clear: + </p> + <p> + My dear Curtade, my only hope below, + </p> + <p> + In vain I love;—you colder, colder grow; + </p> + <p> + While round no fair can boast so fine a face, + </p> + <p> + And numbers wish they might supply thy place, + </p> + <p> + Whilst thou with some gay page prefer'st a bet, + </p> + <p> + Or game of dice with some low, vulgar set, + </p> + <p> + To meeting me alone; and when just now + </p> + <p> + To thee I sent, with rage thou knit'st thy brow, + </p> + <p> + And Dorimene, with ev'ry curse abus'd + </p> + <p> + Then played again, since better that amus'd, + </p> + <p> + And left me here, as if not worth a thought, + </p> + <p> + Or thou didst scorn what I so fondly sought. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ASTONISHMENT, at once, our Roman seiz'd; + </p> + <p> + But who's the fair that thus her bosom eas'd? + </p> + <p> + Or, who's the gay Adonis, form'd to bless? + </p> + <p> + You'd try a day, and not the secret guess, + </p> + <p> + The queen's the belle:—and, doubtless you will stare, + </p> + <p> + The king's own dwarf the idol of her care! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE Roman saw a crevice in the wood, + </p> + <p> + Through which he took a peep from where he stood; + </p> + <p> + To Dorimene our lovers left the key, + </p> + <p> + Which she had dropt when lately forc'd to flee, + </p> + <p> + And this Joconde pick'd up, a lucky hit, + </p> + <p> + Since he could use it when he best thought fit. + </p> + <p> + It seems, said he, I'm not alone in name, + </p> + <p> + And since a prince so handsome is the same, + </p> + <p> + Although a valet has supplied my place, + </p> + <p> + Yet see, the queen prefers a dwarf's embrace. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS thought consol'd so well,—his youthful rays + </p> + <p> + Returned, and e'en excelled his former days; + </p> + <p> + And those who lately ridicul'd his charms, + </p> + <p> + Now anxious seem'd to revel in his arms + </p> + <p> + 'Twas who could have him,—even prudes grew kind;— + </p> + <p> + By many belles Astolphus was resign'd; + </p> + <p> + Though still the king retain'd enough, 'twas seen;— + </p> + <p> + But now let us resume the dwarf and queen. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR Roman, having satisfied his eyes, + </p> + <p> + At length withdrew, confounded by surprise. + </p> + <p> + Who follows courts, must oft with care conceal, + </p> + <p> + And scarcely know what sight and ears reveal. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + YET, by Joconde the king was lov'd so well, + </p> + <p> + What now he'd seen he greatly wish'd to tell; + </p> + <p> + But, since to princes full respect is due, + </p> + <p> + And what concerns them, howsoever true, + </p> + <p> + If thought displeasing, should not be dispos'd + </p> + <p> + In terms direct, but obviously dispos'd, + </p> + <p> + To catch the mind, Joconde at ease detail'd, + </p> + <p> + From days of yore to those he now bewail'd, + </p> + <p> + The names of emp'rors and of kings, whose brows, + </p> + <p> + By wily wives, were crown'd with leafless boughs! + </p> + <p> + And who, without repining, view'd their lot, + </p> + <p> + Nor bad made worse, but thought things best forgot. + </p> + <p> + E'en I, who now your majesty address, + </p> + <p> + Continued he, am sorry to confess, + </p> + <p> + The very day I left my native earth, <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + To wait upon a prince of royal birth, + </p> + <p> + Was forced t'acknowledge cuckoldom among + </p> + <p> + The gods who rule the matrimonial throng, + </p> + <p> + And sacrifice thereto with aching heart + </p> + <p> + Cornuted heads dire torments oft impart: <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE tale he then detail'd, that rais'd his spleen; + </p> + <p> + And what within the closet he had seen; + </p> + <p> + The king replied, I will not be so rude, + </p> + <p> + To question what so clearly you have view'd; + </p> + <p> + Yet, since 'twere better full belief to gain, + </p> + <p> + A glimpse of such a fact I should obtain, + </p> + <p> + Pray bring me thither; instantly our wight; + </p> + <p> + Astolphus led, where both his ears and sight + </p> + <p> + Full proof receiv'd, which struck the prince with awe; + </p> + <p> + Who stood amaz'd at what he heard and saw. + </p> + <p> + But soon reflection's all-convincing pow'r + </p> + <p> + Induced the king vexation to devour; + </p> + <p> + True courtier-like, who dire misfortunes braves, + </p> + <p> + Feels sprouting horns, yet smiles at fools and knaves: + </p> + <p> + Our wives, said he, a pretty trick have play'd, + </p> + <p> + And shamefully the marriage bed betray'd; + </p> + <p> + Let us the compliment return, my friend, + </p> + <p> + And round the country our amours extend; + </p> + <p> + But, in our plan the better to succeed, + </p> + <p> + Our names we'll change; no servants we shall need;— + </p> + <p> + For your relation I desire to pass, + </p> + <p> + So you'll true freedom use; then with a lass + </p> + <p> + We more at ease shall feel, more pleasure gain; + </p> + <p> + Than if attended by my usual train. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + JOCONDE with joy the king's proposal heard; + </p> + <p> + On which the latter with his friend conferr'd; + </p> + <p> + Said he, 'twere surely right to have a book, + </p> + <p> + In which to place the names of those we hook, + </p> + <p> + The whole arrang'd according to their rank, + </p> + <p> + And I'll engage no page remains a blank, + </p> + <p> + But ere we leave the range of our design, + </p> + <p> + E'en scrup'lous dames shall to our wish incline, + </p> + <p> + Our persons handsome, with engaging air, + </p> + <p> + And sprightly, brilliant wit no trifling share,— + </p> + <p> + 'Twere strange, possessing such engaging charms, + </p> + <p> + They should not tumble freely in our arms. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE baggage ready, and the paper-book, + </p> + <p> + our smart gallants the road together took, + </p> + <p> + But 'twould be vain to number their amours; + </p> + <p> + With beauties, Cupid favoured them by scores; + </p> + <p> + Blessed, if only seen by either swain, + </p> + <p> + And doubly bless'd who could attention gain: + </p> + <p> + Nor wife of alderman, nor wife of mayor, + </p> + <p> + Of justice, nor of governor was there, + </p> + <p> + Who did not anxiously desire her name + </p> + <p> + Might straight be entered in the book of fame! + </p> + <p> + Hearts, which before were thought as cold as ice, + </p> + <p> + Now warm'd at once and melted in a trice. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SOME infidel, I fancy, in my ear + </p> + <p> + Would whisper-probabilities, I fear, + </p> + <p> + Are rather wanting to support the fact; + </p> + <p> + However perfectly gallants may act, + </p> + <p> + To gain a heart requires full many a day + </p> + <p> + If more be requisite I cannot say; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis not my plan to dupe or young or old, + </p> + <p> + But such to me, howe'er the tale is told, + </p> + <p> + And Ariosto never truth forsakes; + </p> + <p> + Yet, if at ev'ry step a writer takes, + </p> + <p> + He's closely question'd as to time and place, + </p> + <p> + He ne'er can end his work with easy grace. + </p> + <p> + To those, from whom just credence I receive, + </p> + <p> + Their tales I promise fully to believe. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT length, when our advent'rers round had play'd, + </p> + <p> + And danc'd with ev'ry widow, wife, and maid, + </p> + <p> + The full blown lily and the tender rose, + </p> + <p> + Astolphus said, though clearly I suppose, + </p> + <p> + We can as many hearts securely link, + </p> + <p> + As e'er we like, yet better now, I think, + </p> + <p> + To stop a while in some delightful spot, + </p> + <p> + And that before satiety we've got; + </p> + <p> + For true it is, with love as with our meat; + </p> + <p> + If we, variety of dishes eat, + </p> + <p> + The doctors tell us inj'ry will ensue, + </p> + <p> + And too much raking none can well pursue. + </p> + <p> + Let us some pleasing fair-one then engage, + </p> + <p> + To serve us both:—enough she'll prove I'll wage. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + JOCONDE at once replied, with all my heart, + </p> + <p> + And I a lady know who'll take the part; + </p> + <p> + She's beautiful; possesses store of wit; + </p> + <p> + And is the wife of one above a cit. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WITH such to meddle would be indiscreet, + </p> + <p> + Replied the king, more charms we often meet, + </p> + <p> + Beneath a chambermaid or laundress' dress, + </p> + <p> + Than any rich coquette can well possess. + </p> + <p> + Besides, with those, less form is oft requir'd, + </p> + <p> + While dames of quality must be admir'd; + </p> + <p> + Their whims complied with, though suspicions rise; + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry hour produces fresh surprise, + </p> + <p> + But this sweet charmer of inferior birth + </p> + <p> + A treasure proves; a source of bliss on earth. + </p> + <p> + No trouble she to carry here nor there; + </p> + <p> + No balls she visits, and requires no care; + </p> + <p> + The conquest easy, we may talk or not; + </p> + <p> + The only difficulty we have got, + </p> + <p> + Is how to find one, we may faithful view; + </p> + <p> + So let us choose a girl, to love quite new. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SINCE these, replied the YOUTH, your thoughts appear, + </p> + <p> + What think you of our landlord's daughter here? + </p> + <p> + That she's a perfect virgin I've no doubt, + </p> + <p> + Nor can we find a chaster round about; + </p> + <p> + Her very doll more innocent won't prove, + </p> + <p> + Than this sweet nymph design'd with us to move. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE scheme our prince's approbation met; + </p> + <p> + The very girl, said he, I wish'd to get; + </p> + <p> + This night be our attack; and if her heart + </p> + <p> + Surrenders when our wishes we impart, + </p> + <p> + But one perplexity will then remain; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis who her virgin favours shall obtain? + </p> + <p> + The honour 's all a whim, and I, as king, + </p> + <p> + At once assuredly should claim this thing: + </p> + <p> + The rest 'tis very easy to arrange; + </p> + <p> + As matters suit we presently can change. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IF ceremony 'twere, Joconde replied, + </p> + <p> + All cavil then we quickly could decide; + </p> + <p> + Precedence would no doubt with you remain: + </p> + <p> + But this is quite another case 'tis plain; + </p> + <p> + And equity demands that we agree, + </p> + <p> + By lot to settle which the man shall be. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE noble youths no arguments would spare, + </p> + <p> + And each contended for the spoiler's care; + </p> + <p> + Howe'er Joconde obtained the lucky hit, + </p> + <p> + And first embrac'd this fancied dainty bit. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE girl who was the noble rival's aim, + </p> + <p> + That ev'ning to the room for something came; + </p> + <p> + Our heroes gave her instantly a chair, + </p> + <p> + And lavished praises on her face and hair; + </p> + <p> + A diamond ring soon sparkled in her eyes; + </p> + <p> + Its pleasing pow'rs at sight obtain'd the prize. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE bargain made, she, in the dead of night, + </p> + <p> + When silence reign'd and all was void of light, + </p> + <p> + With careful steps their anxious wish obey'd, + </p> + <p> + And 'tween them both, she presently was laid; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas Paradise they thought, where all is nice, + </p> + <p> + And our young spark believ'd he broke the ice. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE folly I forgive him;—'tis in vain + </p> + <p> + On this to reason—idle to complain; + </p> + <p> + The WISE have oft been dup'd it is confest, + </p> + <p> + And Solomon it seems among the rest. + </p> + <p> + But gay Joconde felt nothing of the kind, + </p> + <p> + A secret pleasure glow'd within his mind; + </p> + <p> + He thought Astolphus wond'rous bliss had missed, + </p> + <p> + And that himself alone the fair had kiss'd; + </p> + <p> + A clod howe'er, who liv'd within the place, + </p> + <p> + Had, prior to the Roman, her embrace. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE soft amour extended through the night, + </p> + <p> + The girl was pleas'd, and all proceeded right; + </p> + <p> + The foll'wing night, the next, 'twas still the same; + </p> + <p> + Young Clod at length her coldness 'gan to blame; + </p> + <p> + And as he felt suspicious of the act, + </p> + <p> + He watch'd her steps and verified the fact: + </p> + <p> + A quarrel instantly between them rose; + </p> + <p> + Howe'er the fair, his anger to compose, + </p> + <p> + And favour not to lose, on honour vow'd, + </p> + <p> + That when the sparks were gone, and time allow'd, + </p> + <p> + She would oblige his craving, fierce desire;— + </p> + <p> + To which the village lad replied with ire:— + </p> + <p> + Pray what care I for any tavern guest, + </p> + <p> + Of either sex; to you I now protest, + </p> + <p> + If I be not indulg'd this very night, + </p> + <p> + I'll publish your amours in mere despite. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HOW can we manage it, replied the belle, + </p> + <p> + I'm quite distressed—indeed the truth to tell, + </p> + <p> + I've promis'd them this night to come again, + </p> + <p> + And if I fail, no doubt can then remain, + </p> + <p> + But I shall lose the ring, their pledg'd reward, + </p> + <p> + Which would, you know for me, be very hard. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TO you I wish the ring, replied young Clod, + </p> + <p> + But do they sleep in bed, or only nod? + </p> + <p> + Tell me, pray; oh, said she, they sleep most sound; + </p> + <p> + But then between them plac'd shall I be found, + </p> + <p> + And while the one amidst Love's frolicks sports, + </p> + <p> + The other quiet lies, or Morpheus courts. + </p> + <p> + On hearing this the rustick lad proposed, + </p> + <p> + To visit her when others' eyes were closed. + </p> + <p> + Oh! never risk it, quickly she replied; + </p> + <p> + 'Twere folly to attempt it by their side. + </p> + <p> + He answer'd, never fear, but only leave + </p> + <p> + The door ajar, and me they'll not perceive. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE door she left exactly as he said; + </p> + <p> + The spark arriv'd, and then approach'd the bed, + </p> + <p> + ('Twas near the foot,) then 'tween the sheets he slid, + </p> + <p> + But God knows how he lay, or what he did. + </p> + <p> + Astolphus and Joconde ne'er smelt a rat, + </p> + <p> + Nor ever dreamt of what their girl was at, + </p> + <p> + At length when each had turn'd and op'd his eyes, + </p> + <p> + Continual movement fill'd him with surprise. + </p> + <p> + The monarch softly said:—why how is this? + </p> + <p> + My friend has eaten something, for in bliss, + </p> + <p> + He revels on, and truly much I fear, + </p> + <p> + His health will show, it may be bought too dear. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS very sentiment Joconde bethought; + </p> + <p> + But Clod a breathing moment having caught, + </p> + <p> + Resum'd his fun, and that so oft would seek: + </p> + <p> + He gratified his wishes for a week; + </p> + <p> + Then watching carefully, he found once more; + </p> + <p> + Our noble heroes had begun to snore, + </p> + <p> + On which he slyly took himself away, + </p> + <p> + The road he came, and ere 'twas break of day; + </p> + <p> + The girl soon follow'd, since she justly fear'd, + </p> + <p> + Still more fatigues:—so off she quickly steer'd, <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT length when both the nobles were awake; + </p> + <p> + Astolphus said, my friend you rest should take, + </p> + <p> + 'Twere better till to-morrow keep in bed, + </p> + <p> + Since sleep, with such fatigues, of course has fled: + </p> + <p> + You talk at random, cried the Roman youth; + </p> + <p> + More rest I fancy you require in truth; + </p> + <p> + You've led a pretty life throughout the night; + </p> + <p> + I? said the king; why I was weary quite, + </p> + <p> + So long I waited; you no respite gave, + </p> + <p> + But wholly seem'd our little nymph t' enslave; + </p> + <p> + At length to try if I from rage could keep, + </p> + <p> + I turn'd my back once more, and went to sleep. + </p> + <p> + If you had willingly the belle resign'd, + </p> + <p> + I was, my friend, to take a turn inclin'd; + </p> + <p> + That had sufficed for me, since I, like you, + </p> + <p> + Perpetual motion never can pursue. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0048m.jpg" alt="0048m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0048.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + YOUR raillery, the Roman youth replied, + </p> + <p> + Quite disconcerted, pray now lay aside, + </p> + <p> + And talk of something else; you've fully shown, + </p> + <p> + That I'm your vassal, and since you are grown + </p> + <p> + So fond that you to keep the girl desire, + </p> + <p> + E'en wholly to yourself, why I'll retire; + </p> + <p> + Do with her what you please, and we shall see, + </p> + <p> + How long this furor will with you agree. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IT may, replied the king, for ever last, + </p> + <p> + If ev'ry night like this, I'm doom'd to fast. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SIRE, said Joconde, no longer let us thus, + </p> + <p> + In terms of playful raillery discuss; + </p> + <p> + Since such your pleasure, send me from your view; + </p> + <p> + On this the youthful monarch angry grew, + </p> + <p> + And many words between the friends arose; + </p> + <p> + The presence of the nymph Astolphus chose; + </p> + <p> + To her they said, between us judge, sweet fair, + </p> + <p> + And every thing was stated then with care. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE girl with blushing cheeks before them kneel'd, + </p> + <p> + And the mysterious tale at once reveal'd. + </p> + <p> + Our heroes laugh'd; the treach'ry vile excus'd; + </p> + <p> + And gave the ring, which much delight diffus'd; + </p> + <p> + Together with a handsome sum of gold, + </p> + <p> + Which soon a husband in her train enroll'd, + </p> + <p> + Who, for a maid, the pretty fair-one took; + </p> + <p> + And then our heroes wand'ring pranks forsook, + </p> + <p> + With laurels cover'd, which in future times, + </p> + <p> + Will make them famous through the Western climes; + </p> + <p> + More glorious since, they only cost, we find, + </p> + <p> + Those sweet ATTENTIONS pleasing to the MIND. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + So many conquests proud of having made, + </p> + <p> + And over full the BOOK of—those who'd play'd; + </p> + <p> + Said gay Astolphus we will now, my friend, + </p> + <p> + Return the shortest road and poaching end; + </p> + <p> + If false our mates, yet we'll console ourselves, + </p> + <p> + That many others have inconstant elves. + </p> + <p> + Perhaps, in things a change will be one day, + </p> + <p> + And only tender flames LOVE'S torch display; + </p> + <p> + But now it seems some evil star presides, + </p> + <p> + And Hymen's flock the devil surely rides. + </p> + <p> + Besides, vile fiends the universe pervade, + </p> + <p> + Whose constant aim is mortals to degrade, + </p> + <p> + And cheat us to our noses if they can, + </p> + <p> + (Hell's imps in human shape, disgrace to man!) + </p> + <p> + Perhaps these wretches have bewitch'd our wives, + </p> + <p> + And made us fancy errors in their lives. + </p> + <p> + Then let us like good citizens, our days + </p> + <p> + In future pass amidst domestick ways; + </p> + <p> + Our absence may indeed restore their hearts, + </p> + <p> + For jealousy oft virtuous truths imparts. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IN this Astolphus certainly believ'd; + </p> + <p> + The friends return'd, and kindly were receiv'd; + </p> + <p> + A little scolding first assail'd the ear; + </p> + <p> + But blissful kisses banish'd ev'ry fear. + </p> + <p> + To balls and banquets ALL themselves resigned; + </p> + <p> + Of dwarf or valet nothing more we find; + </p> + <p> + Each with his wife contentedly remained:— + </p> + <p> + 'Tis thus alone true happiness is gained. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + + <h2> + <a name="Cudgelled_and" id="Cudgelled_and"></a>THE CUDGELLED AND + </h2> + <h2> + CONTENTED CUCKOLD + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0054m.jpg" alt="0054m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0054.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">S</span>OME time ago from Rome, in smart array, + </p> + <p> + A younger brother homeward bent his way, + </p> + <p> + Not much improved, as frequently the case + </p> + <p> + With those who travel to that famous place. + </p> + <p> + Upon the road oft finding, where he stayed, + </p> + <p> + Delightful wines, and handsome belle or maid, + </p> + <p> + With careless ease he loitered up and down.— + </p> + <p> + One day there passed him in a country town, + </p> + <p> + Attended by a page, a lady fair, + </p> + <p> + Whose charming form and all-engaging air, + </p> + <p> + At once his bosom fired with fond desire; + </p> + <p> + And nearer still, her beauties to admire. + </p> + <p> + He most gallantly saw her safely home; + </p> + <p> + Attentions charm the sex where'er we roam. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR thoughtless rambler pleasures always sought: + </p> + <p> + From Rome this spark had num'rous pardons brought; + </p> + <p> + But,—as to virtues (this too oft we find), + </p> + <p> + He'd left them,—with his HOLINESS behind! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE lady was, by ev'ry one, confessed, + </p> + <p> + Of beauty, youth, and elegance possessed; + </p> + <p> + She wanted naught to form her bliss below, + </p> + <p> + But one whose love would ever fondly flow. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + INDEED so fickle proved this giddy youth, + </p> + <p> + That nothing long would please his heart or tooth; + </p> + <p> + Howe'er he earnestly inquired her name, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry other circumstance the same. + </p> + <p> + She's lady, they replied, to great 'squire Good, + </p> + <p> + Who's almost bald from age 'tis understood; + </p> + <p> + But as he's rich, and high in rank appears, + </p> + <p> + Why that's a recompense you know for years. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THESE facts our young gallant no sooner gained, + </p> + <p> + But ardent hopes at once he entertained; + </p> + <p> + To wily plots his mind he quickly bent, + </p> + <p> + And to a neighb'ring town his servants sent; + </p> + <p> + Then, at the house where dwelled our noble 'squire, + </p> + <p> + His humble services proposed for hire. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + PRETENDING ev'ry sort of work he knew, + </p> + <p> + He soon a fav'rite with old Square-toes grew, + </p> + <p> + Who (first advising with his charming mate), + </p> + <p> + Chief falc'ner made him o'er his fine estate. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE new domestick much the lady pleased; + </p> + <p> + He watched and eagerly the moment seized, + </p> + <p> + His ardent passion boldly to declare, + </p> + <p> + In which he showed a novice had no share. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + 'TWAS managed well, for nothing but the chase, + </p> + <p> + Could Square-toes tempt to quit her fond embrace, + </p> + <p> + And then our falc'ner must his steps attend:— + </p> + <p> + The very time he wished at home to spend. + </p> + <p> + The lady similar emotions showed; + </p> + <p> + For opportunity their bosoms glowed; + </p> + <p> + And who will feel in argument so bold, + </p> + <p> + When this I say, the contrary to hold? + </p> + <p> + At length with pity Cupid saw the case, + </p> + <p> + And kindly lent his aid to their embrace. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ONE night the lady said, with eager eyes, + </p> + <p> + My dear, among our servants, which d'ye prize, + </p> + <p> + For moral conduct most and upright heart? + </p> + <p> + To this her spouse replied, the faithful part + </p> + <p> + Is with the falc'ner found, I must decide: + </p> + <p> + To him my life I'd readily confide. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THEN you are wrong, said she,—most truly so, + </p> + <p> + For he's a good-for-nothing wretch I know; + </p> + <p> + You'll scarcely credit it, but t'other day, + </p> + <p> + He had the barefaced impudence to say, + </p> + <p> + He loved me much, and then his passion pressed: + </p> + <p> + I'd nearly fallen, I was so distressed. + </p> + <p> + To tear his eyes out, I designed at first, + </p> + <p> + And e'en to choke this wretch, of knaves the worst; + </p> + <p> + By prudence solely was I then restrained, + </p> + <p> + For fear the world should think his point was gained. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE better then to prove his dark intent, + </p> + <p> + I feigned an inclination to consent, + </p> + <p> + And in the garden, promised as to-night, + </p> + <p> + I'd near the pear-tree meet this roguish wight. + </p> + <p> + Said I, my husband never moves from hence; + </p> + <p> + No jealous fancy, but to show the sense + </p> + <p> + He entertains of my pure, virtuous life, + </p> + <p> + And fond affection for a loving wife. + </p> + <p> + Thus circumstanced, your wishes see are vain, + </p> + <p> + Unless when he's asleep a march I gain, + </p> + <p> + And softly stealing from his torpid side, + </p> + <p> + With trembling steps I, to my lover, glide. + </p> + <p> + So things remain, my dear; an odd affair:— + </p> + <p> + On this Square-toes 'gan to curse and swear; + </p> + <p> + But his fond rib most earnestly besought, + </p> + <p> + His rage to stifle, as she clearly thought, + </p> + <p> + He might in person, if he'd take the pain, + </p> + <p> + Secure the rascal and redress obtain + </p> + <p> + You know, said she, the tree is near the door, + </p> + <p> + Upon the left and bears of fruit great store; + </p> + <p> + But if I may my sentiments express, + </p> + <p> + In cap and petticoats you'd best to dress; + </p> + <p> + His insolence is great, and you'll be right, + </p> + <p> + To give your strokes with double force to night; + </p> + <p> + Well work his back; flat lay him on the ground:— + </p> + <p> + A rascal! honourable ladies round, + </p> + <p> + No doubt he many times has served the same; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis such impostors characters defame. + </p> + <p> + To rouse his wrath the story quite sufficed; + </p> + <p> + The spouse resolved to do as she advised. + </p> + <p> + Howe'er to dupe him was an easy lot; + </p> + <p> + The hour arrived, his dress he soon had got, + </p> + <p> + Away he ran with anxious fond delight. + </p> + <p> + In hopes the wily spark to trap that night. + </p> + <p> + But no one there our easy fool could see, + </p> + <p> + And while he waited near the fav'rite tree, + </p> + <p> + Half dead with cold, the falc'ner slyly stole, + </p> + <p> + To her who had so well contrived the whole; + </p> + <p> + Time, place, and disposition, all combined + </p> + <p> + The loving pair to mutual joys resigned. + </p> + <p> + When our expert gallant had with the dame, + </p> + <p> + An hour or more indulged his ardent flame, + </p> + <p> + Though forced at length to quit the loving lass, + </p> + <p> + 'Twas not without the favourite parting glass; + </p> + <p> + He then the garden sought, where long the 'squire, + </p> + <p> + Upon the knave had wished to vent his ire. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0060m.jpg" alt="0060m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0060.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + NO sooner he the silly husband spied, + </p> + <p> + But feigning 'twas the wily wife he eyed, + </p> + <p> + At once he cried,—ah, vilest of the sex! + </p> + <p> + Are these thy tricks, so good a man to vex? + </p> + <p> + Oh shame upon thee! thus to treat his love, + </p> + <p> + As pure as snow, descending from above. + </p> + <p> + I could not think thou hadst so base a heart, + </p> + <p> + But clear it is, thou need'st a friendly part, + </p> + <p> + And that I'll act: I asked this rendezvous + </p> + <p> + With full intent to see if thou wert true; + </p> + <p> + And, God be praised, without a loose design, + </p> + <p> + To plunge in luxuries pronounced divine. + </p> + <p> + Protect me Heav'n! poor sinner that I'm here! + </p> + <p> + To guard thy honour I will persevere. + </p> + <p> + My worthy master could I thus disgrace? + </p> + <p> + Thou wanton baggage with unblushing face, + </p> + <p> + Thee on the spot I'll instantly chastise, + </p> + <p> + And then thy husband of the fact advise. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE fierce harangue o'er Square-toes pleasure spread, + </p> + <p> + Who, mutt'ring 'tween his teeth, with fervour said: + </p> + <p> + O gracious Lord! to thee my thanks are due— + </p> + <p> + To have a wife so chaste—a man so true! + </p> + <p> + But presently he felt upon his back + </p> + <p> + The falc'ner's cudgel vigorously thwack, + </p> + <p> + Who soundly basted him as on he ran, + </p> + <p> + To gain the house, with terror, pale and wan. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE squire had wished his trusty man, no doubt, + </p> + <p> + Had not, at cudgelling, been quite so stout; + </p> + <p> + But since he showed himself so true a friend, + </p> + <p> + And with his actions could such prudence blend, + </p> + <p> + The master fully pardoned what he knew, + </p> + <p> + And quickly to his wife in bed he flew, + </p> + <p> + When he related every thing that passed + </p> + <p> + Were we, cried he, a hundred years to last, + </p> + <p> + My lovely dear, we ne'er on earth could find + </p> + <p> + A man so faithful, and so well inclined. + </p> + <p> + I'd have him take within our town a wife, + </p> + <p> + And you and I'll regard him during life. + </p> + <p> + In that, replied the lady, we agree, + </p> + <p> + And heartily thereto I pledged will be. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + + <h2> + <a name="Husband_Confessor" id="Husband_Confessor"></a>THE + HUSBAND-CONFESSOR + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0064m.jpg" alt="0064m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0064.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">W</span>HEN Francis (named the first) o'er Frenchmen reign'd, + </p> + <p> + In Italy young Arthur laurels gained, + </p> + <p> + And oft such daring valour showed in fight, + </p> + <p> + With ev'ry honour he was made a knight; + </p> + <p> + The monarch placed the spur upon his heel, + </p> + <p> + That all around his proper worth might feel. + </p> + <p> + Then household deities at home he sought, + </p> + <p> + Where—not at prayers his beauteous dame he caught: + </p> + <p> + He'd left her, truly, quite dissolv'd in tears; + </p> + <p> + But now the belle had bid adieu to fears; + </p> + <p> + And oft was dancing joyously around, + </p> + <p> + With all the company that could be found. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + GALLANTS in crowds Sir Arthur soon perceived; + </p> + <p> + At sight of these the knight was sorely grieved; + </p> + <p> + And, turning in his mind how best to act; + </p> + <p> + Cried he, Can this be truly held a fact, + </p> + <p> + That I've been worthy while I'd fame in view, + </p> + <p> + Of cuckoldom at home, and knighthood too? + </p> + <p> + It ought to be but half:—the truth let's know; + </p> + <p> + From constancy the purest blessings flow. + </p> + <p> + Then like a father-confessor he dressed, + </p> + <p> + And took his seat where priests their flock confessed. + </p> + <p> + His lady absolution sought that day, + </p> + <p> + And on her knees before him 'gan to pray; + </p> + <p> + The minor sins were told with downcast eyes, + </p> + <p> + And then for hearing those of larger size, + </p> + <p> + The husband-confessor prepared his ears:— + </p> + <p> + Said she, Good father, ('mid a flood of tears), + </p> + <p> + My bed receives, (the fault I fear's not slight,) + </p> + <p> + A gentleman, a parson, and a knight. + </p> + <p> + Still more had followed, but, by rage o'ercome, + </p> + <p> + Sir Arthur cut the thread, and she was mum; + </p> + <p> + Though, doubtless, had the fair been let proceed, + </p> + <p> + Quite long her Litany had been decreed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0068m.jpg" alt="0068m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0068.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + THe husband, in a rage, exclaimed, thou jade, + </p> + <p> + A parson, say'st thou? t'whom dost think thou'st made + </p> + <p> + This curst confession?—To my spouse, cried she, + </p> + <p> + I saw you enter here, and came with glee, + </p> + <p> + Supposing you'd a trick to raise surprise; + </p> + <p> + Howe'er 'tis strange that one so very wise, + </p> + <p> + The riddle should not fully comprehend:— + </p> + <p> + A KNIGHT, the king created you, my friend; + </p> + <p> + A GENTLEMAN, your rank was long ago; + </p> + <p> + A PARSON, you have made yourself you know. + </p> + <p> + Goon heav'ns! exclaimed the knight, 'tis very clear, + </p> + <p> + And I a blockhead surely must appear. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Cobbler" id="Cobbler"></a>THE COBBLER + </h2><p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">W</span>E'RE told, that once a cobbler, BLASE by name; + </p> + <p> + A wife had got, whose charms so high in fame; + </p> + <p> + But as it happened, that their cash was spent, + </p> + <p> + The honest couple to a neighbour went, + </p> + <p> + A corn-factor by trade, not overwise + </p> + <p> + To whom they stated facts without disguise; + </p> + <p> + And begged, with falt'ring voice denoting care, + </p> + <p> + That he, of wheat, would half a measure spare, + </p> + <p> + Upon their note, which readily he gave, + </p> + <p> + And all advantages desired to wave. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE time for payment came; the money used; + </p> + <p> + The cash our factor would not be refused; + </p> + <p> + Of writs he talked, attorneys, and distress; + </p> + <p> + The reason:—heav'n can tell, and you may guess; + </p> + <p> + In short, 'twas clear our gay gallant desired, + </p> + <p> + To cheer the wife, whose beauty all admired. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SAID he, what anxiously I wish to get, + </p> + <p> + You've plenty stored, and never wanted yet; + </p> + <p> + You surely know my meaning?—Yes, she cried; + </p> + <p> + I'll turn it in my mind, and we'll decide + </p> + <p> + How best to act. Away she quickly flew, + </p> + <p> + And Blase informed, what Ninny had in view. + </p> + <p> + Zounds! said the cobbler, we must see, my dear, + </p> + <p> + To hook this little sum:—the way is clear; + </p> + <p> + No risk I'm confident; for prithee run + </p> + <p> + And tell him I've a journey just begun; + </p> + <p> + That he may hither come and have his will; + </p> + <p> + But 'ere he touch thy lips, demand the bill; + </p> + <p> + He'll not refuse the boon I'm very sure; + </p> + <p> + Meantime, myself I'll hide and all secure. + </p> + <p> + The note obtained, cough loudly, strong, and clear; + </p> + <p> + Twice let it be, that I may plainly hear; + </p> + <p> + Then forth I'll sally from my lurking place, + </p> + <p> + And, spite of folly's frowns, prevent disgrace. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE plot succeeded as the pair desired; + </p> + <p> + The cobbler laughed, and ALL his scheme admired: <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0074m.jpg" alt="0074m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0074.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + A purse-proud cit thereon observed and swore; + </p> + <p> + 'Twere better to have coughed when all was o'er; + </p> + <p> + Then you, all three, would have enjoyed your wish, + </p> + <p> + And been in future all as mute as fish. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OH! sir, replied the cobbler's wife at ease, + </p> + <p> + Do you suppose that use can hope to please, + </p> + <p> + And like your ladies full of sense appear? + </p> + <p> + (For two were seated with his wedded dear;) + </p> + <p> + Perhaps my lady 'd act as you describe, + </p> + <p> + But ev'ry one such prudence don't imbibe. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + + <h2> + <a name="Peasant_and" id="Peasant_and"></a>THE PEASANT AND + </h2> + + <h2> + HIS ANGRY LORD + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0080m.jpg" alt="0080m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0080.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">O</span>NCE on a time, as hist'ry's page relates, + </p> + <p> + A lord, possessed of many large estates, + </p> + <p> + Was angry with a poor and humble clod, + </p> + <p> + Who tilled his grounds and feared his very nod. + </p> + <p> + Th' offence (as often happens) was but small, + </p> + <p> + But on him, vowed the peer, his rage should fall— + </p> + <p> + Said he, a halter, rascal, you deserve; + </p> + <p> + You'll never from the gallows-turnpike swerve: + </p> + <p> + Or, soon or late you swinging will be found + </p> + <p> + Who, born for hanging, ever yet was drowned? + </p> + <p> + Howe'er you'll smile to hear my lenient voice; + </p> + <p> + Observe, three punishments await your choice; + </p> + <p> + Take which you will.—The first is, you shall eat, + </p> + <p> + Of strongest garlick, thirty heads complete; + </p> + <p> + No drink you'll have between, nor sleep, nor rest; + </p> + <p> + You know a breach of promise I detest. + </p> + <p> + Or, on your shoulders further I propose, + </p> + <p> + To give you, with a cudgel, thirty blows. + </p> + <p> + Or, if more pleasing, that you truly pay, + </p> + <p> + The sum of thirty pounds without delay. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE peasant 'gan to turn things in his mind:— + </p> + <p> + Said he, to take the heads I'm not inclined; + </p> + <p> + No drink, you say, between; that makes it worse; + </p> + <p> + To eat the garlick thus, would prove a curse. + </p> + <p> + Nor can I suffer on my tender back, + </p> + <p> + That, with a cudgel, thirty blows you thwack. + </p> + <p> + Still harder thirty pounds to pay appeared; + </p> + <p> + Uncertain how to act, he hanging feared. + </p> + <p> + The noble peer he begged, upon his knees, + </p> + <p> + His penitence to hear, and sentence ease. + </p> + <p> + But mercy dwelled not with the angry lord + </p> + <p> + Is this, cried he, the answer?—bring a cord. + </p> + <p> + The peasant, trembling lest his life was sought; + </p> + <p> + The garlick chose, which presently was brought. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + UPON a dish my lord the number told; + </p> + <p> + Clod no way liked the garlick to behold. + </p> + <p> + With piteous mien the garlick head he took, + </p> + <p> + Then on it num'rous ways was led to look, + </p> + <p> + And grumbling much, began to spit and eat, + </p> + <p> + just like a cat with mustard on her meat, + </p> + <p> + To touch it with his tongue he durst not do; + </p> + <p> + He knew not how to act or what pursue. + </p> + <p> + The peer, delighted at the man's distress, + </p> + <p> + The garlick made him bite, and chew, and press, + </p> + <p> + Then gulp it down as if delicious fare; + </p> + <p> + The first he passed; the second made him swear; + </p> + <p> + The third he found was every whit as sad, + </p> + <p> + He wished the devil had it, 'twas so bad. + </p> + <p> + In short, when at the twelfth our wight arrived, + </p> + <p> + He thought his mouth and throat of skin deprived. + </p> + <p> + Said he, some drink I earnestly intreat; + </p> + <p> + What, Greg'ry, cried my lord, dost feel a heat; + </p> + <p> + In thy repasts dost love to wet thy jaws? + </p> + <p> + Well! well! I won't object; thou know'st my laws; + </p> + <p> + Much good may't do thee; here, some wine, some wine! + </p> + <p> + Yet recollect, to drink, since you design, + </p> + <p> + That afterward, my friend, you'll have to choose + </p> + <p> + The thirty blows, or thirty pounds to lose. + </p> + <p> + But, cried the peasant, I sincerely pray, + </p> + <p> + Your lordship's goodness, that the garlick may + </p> + <p> + Be taken in the account, for as to pelf, + </p> + <p> + Where can an humble lab'rer, like myself, + </p> + <p> + Expect the sum of thirty pounds to seize? + </p> + <p> + Then, said the peer, be cudgelled if you please; + </p> + <p> + Take thirty thwacks; for naught the garlick goes. + </p> + <p> + To moisten well his throat, and ease his woes, + </p> + <p> + The peasant drank a copious draught of wine, + </p> + <p> + And then to bear the cudgel would resign. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A SINGLE blow he patiently endured; + </p> + <p> + The second, howsoe'er, his patience cured; + </p> + <p> + The third was more severe, and each was worse; + </p> + <p> + The punishment he now began to curse; + </p> + <p> + Two lusty wights, with cudgels thrashed his back + </p> + <p> + And regularly gave him thwack and thwack; + </p> + <p> + He cried, he roared, for grace he begged his lord, + </p> + <p> + Who marked each blow, and would no ease accord; + </p> + <p> + But carefully observed, from time to time, + </p> + <p> + That lenity he always thought sublime; + </p> + <p> + His gravity preserved; considered too + </p> + <p> + The blows received and what continued due. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT length, when Greg'ry twenty strokes had got, + </p> + <p> + He piteously exclaimed:—if more's my lot + </p> + <p> + I never shall survive! Oh! pray forgive, + </p> + <p> + If you desire, my lord, that I should live. + </p> + <p> + Then down with thirty pounds, replied the peer, + </p> + <p> + Since you the blows so much pretend to fear; + </p> + <p> + I'm sorry for you; but if all the gold + </p> + <p> + Be not prepared, your godfather, I'm told, + </p> + <p> + Can lend a part; yet, since so far you've been, + </p> + <p> + To flinch the rest you surely won't be seen. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE wretched peasant to his lordship flew, + </p> + <p> + And trembling cried—'tis up! the number view! + </p> + <p> + A scrutiny was made, which nothing gained; + </p> + <p> + No choice but pay the money now remained; + </p> + <p> + This grieved him much, and o'er the fellow's face; + </p> + <p> + The dewy drops were seen to flow apace. + </p> + <p> + All useless proved:—the full demand he sent, + </p> + <p> + With which the peer expressed himself content. + </p> + <p> + Unlucky he whoe'er his lord offends! + </p> + <p> + To golden ore, howe'er, the proud man bends: <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + 'TWAS vain that Gregory a pardon prayed; + </p> + <p> + For trivial faults the peasant dearly paid; + </p> + <p> + His throat enflamed—his tender back well beat— + </p> + <p> + His money gone—and all to make complete, + </p> + <p> + Without the least deduction for the pain, + </p> + <p> + The blows and garlick gave the trembling swain. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Muleteer" id="Muleteer"></a>THE MULETEER + </h2><p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">T</span>HE Lombard princes oft pervade my mind; + </p> + <p> + The present tale Boccace relates you'll find; + </p> + <p> + Agiluf was the noble monarch's name; + </p> + <p> + Teudelingua he married, beauteous dame, + </p> + <p> + The last king's widow, who had left no heir, + </p> + <p> + And whose dominions proved our prince's share. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + No Beauty round compare could with the queen; + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry blessing on the throne was seen, + </p> + <p> + When Cupid, in a playful moment, came, + </p> + <p> + And o'er Agiluf's stable placed his flame; + </p> + <p> + There left it carelessly to burn at will, + </p> + <p> + Which soon began a muleteer to fill, + </p> + <p> + With LOVE'S all-powerful, all-consuming fire, + </p> + <p> + That naught controls, and youthful breasts desire. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE muleteer was pleasing to the sight: + </p> + <p> + Gallant, good-humoured, airy, and polite, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry way his humble birth belied; + </p> + <p> + A handsome person, nor was sense denied; + </p> + <p> + He showed it well, for when the youth beheld, + </p> + <p> + With eyes of love, the queen, who all excelled, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry effort anxiously had made, + </p> + <p> + To stop the flames that would his heart invade; + </p> + <p> + When vain it proved, he took a prudent part:— <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHO can, like Cupid, manage wily art? + </p> + <p> + Whate'er stupidity we may discern, + </p> + <p> + His pupils more within a day can learn, + </p> + <p> + Than MASTERS knowledge in the schools can gain, + </p> + <p> + Though they in study should ten years remain; + </p> + <p> + The lowest clown he presently inspires, + </p> + <p> + With ev'ry tendency that love requires; + </p> + <p> + Of this our present tale's a proof direct, + </p> + <p> + And none that feel—its truths will e'er suspect: <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE am'rous muleteer his thoughts employed; + </p> + <p> + Consid'ring how his wish might be enjoyed. + </p> + <p> + Without success to certainty were brought, + </p> + <p> + Life seemed to him not worth a slender thought; + </p> + <p> + To hazard ev'ry thing; to live or die! + </p> + <p> + Possession have!—or in the grave to lie! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE Lombard custom was, that when the king, + </p> + <p> + Who slept not with his queen, (a common thing + </p> + <p> + In other countries too), desired to greet + </p> + <p> + His royal consort, and in bed to meet, + </p> + <p> + A night-gown solely o'er his back he threw, + </p> + <p> + And then proceeded to the interview, + </p> + <p> + Knocked softly at the door, on which a fair, + </p> + <p> + Who waited on the queen with anxious care, + </p> + <p> + Allowed the prince to enter; took his light, + </p> + <p> + (Which only glimmered in the midst of night,) + </p> + <p> + Then put it out, and quickly left the room:— + </p> + <p> + A little lantern to dispel the gloom, + </p> + <p> + With waxen taper that emitted rays— + </p> + <p> + In diff'rent countries various are their ways! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR wily, prying, crafty muleteer, + </p> + <p> + Knew well these forms were current through the year: + </p> + <p> + He, like the king, at night himself equipped, + </p> + <p> + And to the queen's superb apartment slipped. + </p> + <p> + His face concealed the fellow tried to keep; + </p> + <p> + The waiting dame was more than half asleep; + </p> + <p> + The lover got access:—soon all was clear; + </p> + <p> + The prince's coming he had but to fear, + </p> + <p> + And, as the latter had, throughout the day, + </p> + <p> + The chase attended an extensive way, + </p> + <p> + 'Twas more than probable he'd not be led, + </p> + <p> + (Since such fatigue he'd had,) to quit his bed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + PERFUMED, quite neat, and lively as a bird, + </p> + <p> + Our spark (safe entered) uttered not a word. + </p> + <p> + 'Twas often customary with the king, + </p> + <p> + When state affairs, or other weighty thing, + </p> + <p> + Displeasure gave, to take of love his fill, + </p> + <p> + Yet let his tongue the while continue still. + </p> + <p> + A singularity we needs must own, + </p> + <p> + With this the wife was long familiar grown. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR am'rous wight more joys than one received, + </p> + <p> + If our narrator of the tale's believed; + </p> + <p> + (In bed a muleteer is worth three kings, + </p> + <p> + And value oft is found in humble things.) + </p> + <p> + The queen began to think her husband's rage + </p> + <p> + Had proved a stimulus such wars to wage, + </p> + <p> + And made him wond'rous stout in pleasure's sport, + </p> + <p> + Though all the while his thoughts were-'bout the court. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0088m.jpg" alt="0088m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0088.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + WITH perfect justice Heav'n its gifts bestows; + </p> + <p> + But equal talents all should not compose. + </p> + <p> + The prince's virtues doubtless were designed, + </p> + <p> + To take command, and govern o'er mankind. + </p> + <p> + The lawyer, points of difficulty views, + </p> + <p> + Decides with judgment, and the truth pursues. + </p> + <p> + In Cupid's scenes the muleteer succeeds:— + </p> + <p> + Each has his part:—none universal meeds. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WITH pleasures feasted, our gallant retired, + </p> + <p> + Before the morn fresh blushes had acquired. + </p> + <p> + But scarcely had he left the tender scene, + </p> + <p> + 'Ere king Agiluf came to see his queen, + </p> + <p> + Who much surprise expressed, and to him said: + </p> + <p> + My dear, I know your love, but from this bed, + </p> + <p> + You'll recollect how recently you went, + </p> + <p> + And having wonders done, should be content. + </p> + <p> + For heav'n's sake, consider more your health; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis dearer far to me than Croesus' wealth. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WITHIN the royal breast suspicions rose, + </p> + <p> + But nothing then the monarch would disclose. + </p> + <p> + He instantly withdrew without a word; + </p> + <p> + His sentiments to speak had been absurd, + </p> + <p> + And to the stable flew, since he believed + </p> + <p> + The circumstances, which his bosom grieved, + </p> + <p> + Whate'er mysterious doubts might then appear, + </p> + <p> + Proceeded from some am'rous muleteer. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN round the dorture he began to creep, + </p> + <p> + The troop appeared as if dissolved in sleep, + </p> + <p> + And so they truly were, save our gallant, + </p> + <p> + Whose terrors made him tremble, sigh, and pant: + </p> + <p> + No light the king had got; it still was dark; + </p> + <p> + Agiluf groped about to find the spark, + </p> + <p> + Persuaded that the culprit might be known, + </p> + <p> + By rapid beating of the pulse alone. + </p> + <p> + The thought was good; to feel the prince began, + </p> + <p> + And at the second venture, found his man, + </p> + <p> + Who, whether from the pleasures he'd enjoyed, + </p> + <p> + Or fear, or dread discov'ry to avoid, + </p> + <p> + Experienced (spite of ev'ry wily art,) + </p> + <p> + At once quick beating of the pulse and heart. + </p> + <p> + In doubt how this adventure yet might end, + </p> + <p> + He thought to seem asleep would him befriend. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + MEANWHILE the king, though not without much pains, + </p> + <p> + Obtained the scissors used for horses' manes. + </p> + <p> + With these, he said, I'll mark the fond gallant, + </p> + <p> + That I may know again the one I want. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE monarch from the muleteer with care, + </p> + <p> + In front, snipt off a bulky lock of hair. + </p> + <p> + This having done, he suddenly withdrew; + </p> + <p> + But carelessly away the trophy threw; + </p> + <p> + Of which the sly gallant advantage took, + </p> + <p> + And thus the prince's subtle project shook; + </p> + <p> + For instantly began our artful spark, + </p> + <p> + His fellow servants like himself to mark. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN day arrived the monarch was surprised, + </p> + <p> + To see each muleteer alike disguised; + </p> + <p> + No hair in front of either now was seen; + </p> + <p> + Why, how is this? said he: What can it mean? + </p> + <p> + Fifteen or more, if I believe my sight, + </p> + <p> + My wife has satisfied this very night. + </p> + <p> + Well! well! he'll now escape if mum he prove; + </p> + <p> + But there again I trust he ne'er shall move. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + + <p> + <a name="p51" id="p51"></a><img alt="p51.jpg (48K)" src="images/p51.jpg" + height="501" width="661" /> + </p> + + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Servant_Girl" id="Servant_Girl"></a>THE SERVANT GIRL JUSTIFIED + </h2><p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">B</span>OCCACE alone is not my only source; + </p> + <p> + T'another shop I now shall have recourse; + </p> + <p> + Though, certainly, this famed Italian wit + </p> + <p> + Has many stories for my purpose fit. + </p> + <p> + But since of diff'rent dishes we should taste; + </p> + <p> + Upon an ancient work my hands I've placed; + </p> + <p> + Where full a hundred narratives are told, + </p> + <p> + And various characters we may behold; + </p> + <p> + From life, Navarre's fair queen the fact relates; + </p> + <p> + My story int'rest in her page creates; + </p> + <p> + Beyond dispute from her we always find, + </p> + <p> + Simplicity with striking art combin'd. + </p> + <p> + Yet, whether 'tis the queen who writes, or not; + </p> + <p> + I shall, as usual, here and there allot + </p> + <p> + Whate'er additions requisite appear; + </p> + <p> + Without such license I'd not persevere, + </p> + <p> + But quit, at once, narrations of the sort; + </p> + <p> + Some may be long, though others are too short. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + LET us proceed, howe'er (our plan explained:) + </p> + <p> + A pretty servant-girl a man retain'd. + </p> + <p> + She pleas'd his eye, and presently he thought, + </p> + <p> + With ease she might to am'rous sports be brought; + </p> + <p> + He prov'd not wrong; the wench was blithe and gay, + </p> + <p> + A buxom lass, most able ev'ry way. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT dawn, one summer's morn, the spark was led + </p> + <p> + To rise, and leave his wife asleep in bed; + </p> + <p> + He sought at once the garden, where he found + </p> + <p> + The servant-girl collecting flow'rs around, + </p> + <p> + To make a nosegay for his better half, + </p> + <p> + Whose birth-day 'twas:—he soon began to laugh, + </p> + <p> + And while the ranging of the flow'rs he prais'd, + </p> + <p> + The servant's neckerchief he slyly rais'd. + </p> + <p> + Who, suddenly, on feeling of the hand, + </p> + <p> + Resistance feign'd, and seem'd to make a stand; + </p> + <p> + But since these liberties were nothing new, + </p> + <p> + They other fun and frolicks would pursue; + </p> + <p> + The nosegay at the fond gallant was thrown; + </p> + <p> + The flow'rs he kiss'd, and now more ardent grown + </p> + <p> + They romp'd and rattl'd, play'd and skipt around; + </p> + <p> + At length the fair one fell upon the ground; + </p> + <p> + Our am'rous spark advantage took of this, + </p> + <p> + And nothing with the couple seem'd amiss. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + UNLUCKILY, a neighbour's prying eyes + </p> + <p> + Beheld their playful pranks with great surprise, + </p> + <p> + She, from her window, could the scene o'erlook; + </p> + <p> + When this the fond gallant observ'd, he shook; + </p> + <p> + Said he, by heav'ns! our frolicking is seen, + </p> + <p> + By that old haggard, envious, prying quean; + </p> + <p> + But do not heed it; instantly he chose + </p> + <p> + To run and wake his wife, who quickly rose;— + </p> + <p> + So much the dame he fondl'd and caress'd, + </p> + <p> + The garden walk she took at his request, + </p> + <p> + To have a nosegay, where he play'd anew + </p> + <p> + Pranks just the same as those of recent view, + </p> + <p> + Which highly gratified our lady fair, + </p> + <p> + Who felt dispos'd, and would at eve repair, + </p> + <p> + To her good neighbour, whom she bursting found, + </p> + <p> + With what she'd seen that morn upon the ground. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE usual greetings o'er, our envious dame, + </p> + <p> + With scowling brow exclaim'd,—my dear, your fame, + </p> + <p> + I love too much not fully to detail, + </p> + <p> + What I have witnessed, and with truth bewail; + </p> + <p> + Will you continue, in your house to keep + </p> + <p> + A girl, whose conduct almost makes me weep? + </p> + <p> + Anon I'd kick her from your house, I say; + </p> + <p> + The strumpet should not stay another day. + </p> + <p> + The wife replied, you surely are deceiv'd; + </p> + <p> + An honest, virtuous creature she's believ'd. + </p> + <p> + Well, I can easily, my friend, suppose, + </p> + <p> + Rejoin'd the neighbour, whence this favour flows; + </p> + <p> + But look about, and be convinc'd, this morn + </p> + <p> + From my own window (true as you are born,) + </p> + <p> + Within the garden I your husband spi'd + </p> + <p> + And presently the servant girl I ey'd; + </p> + <p> + At one another various flow'rs they threw, + </p> + <p> + And then the minx a little graver grew. + </p> + <p> + I understand you, cried the list'ning fair; + </p> + <p> + You are deceiv'd:—myself alone was there. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0092m.jpg" alt="0092m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0092.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + NEIGHBOUR <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + But patience, if you please: attend I pray + </p> + <p> + You've no conception what I meant to say: + </p> + <p> + The playful fair was actively employ'd, + </p> + <p> + In plucking am'rous flow'rs—they kiss'd and toy'd. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WIFE <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + 'Twas clearly I, howe'er, for her you took. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NEIGHBOUR <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + The flow'rs for bosoms quickly they forsook; + </p> + <p> + Large handfuls frequently they seem'd to grasp, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry beauty in its turn to clasp. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WIFE <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + But still, why think you, friend, it was not I? + </p> + <p> + Has not your spouse with you a right to try + </p> + <p> + What freaks he likes? <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NEIGHBOUR <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + But then, upon the ground + </p> + <p> + This girl was thrown, and never cried nor frown'd; + </p> + <p> + You laugh.— <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WIFE <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + Indeed I do, 'twas myself. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NEIGHBOUR <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A flannel petticoat display'd the elf. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WIFE <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + 'Twas mine: <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NEIGHBOUR <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + Be patient:—and inform me, pray, + </p> + <p> + If this were worn by you or her to-day? + </p> + <p> + There lies the point, for, if you'll me believe, + </p> + <p> + Your husband did—the most you can conceive. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WIFE <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + How hard of credence!—'twas myself I vow. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NEIGHBOUR <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + Oh! that's conclusive; I'll be silent now; + </p> + <p> + Though truly I am led to think, my eyes + </p> + <p> + Are pretty sharp, and much I feel surprise + </p> + <p> + At what you say; in fact, I would have sworn, + </p> + <p> + I saw them thus at romps this very morn; + </p> + <p> + Excuse the hint, and do not turn her off. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WIFE <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + Why, turn her off?—the very thought I scoff; + </p> + <p> + She serves me well. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NEIGHBOUR <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + And so it seems is taught; + </p> + <p> + By all means keep her then, since thus she's thought. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + <br /><br /> <a name="Three_Gossips" id="Three_Gossips"></a> <br /><br /> + </p> + + <h2> + THE THREE GOSSIPS' WAGER + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0098m.jpg" alt="0098m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0098.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">A</span>S o'er their wine one day, three gossips sat, + </p> + <p> + Discoursing various pranks in pleasant chat, + </p> + <p> + Each had a loving friend, and two of these + </p> + <p> + Most clearly managed matters at their ease. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SAID one, a princely husband I have got. + </p> + <p> + A better in the world there's surely not; + </p> + <p> + With him I can adjust as humour fits, + </p> + <p> + No need to rise at early dawn, like cits, + </p> + <p> + To prove to him that two and three make four, + </p> + <p> + Or ask his leave to ope or shut the door. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + UPON my word, replied another fair, + </p> + <p> + If he were mine, I openly declare, + </p> + <p> + To judge from what so pleasantly you say, + </p> + <p> + I'd make a present of him new-year's day. + </p> + <p> + For pleasure never gives me full delight, + </p> + <p> + Unless a little pain the bliss invite. + </p> + <p> + No doubt your husband moves as he is led; + </p> + <p> + Thank heav'n a different mortal claims my bed; + </p> + <p> + To take him in, great nicety we need; + </p> + <p> + But howsoe'er, at times I can succeed; + </p> + <p> + The satisfaction doubly then is felt:— + </p> + <p> + In fond emotion bosoms freely melt. + </p> + <p> + With neither of you, husband or gallant, + </p> + <p> + Would I exchange, though these so much you vaunt. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ON this, the third with candour interfer'd; + </p> + <p> + She thought that oft the god of love appear'd, + </p> + <p> + Good husbands playfully to fret and vex, + </p> + <p> + Sometimes to rally couples: then perplex; + </p> + <p> + But warmer as the conversation grew, + </p> + <p> + She, anxious that each disputant might view + </p> + <p> + Herself victorious, (or believe it so,) + </p> + <p> + Exclaim'd, if either of you wish to show + </p> + <p> + Who's in the right, with argument have done, + </p> + <p> + And let us practise some new scheme of fun, + </p> + <p> + To dupe our husbands; she who don't succeed + </p> + <p> + Shall pay a forfeit; all replied, "Agreed." + </p> + <p> + But then, continued she, we ought to take + </p> + <p> + An oath, that we will full discov'ry make, + </p> + <p> + To one another of the various facts, + </p> + <p> + Without disguising even trifling acts. + </p> + <p> + And then, good upright Macae shall decide; + </p> + <p> + Thus things arrang'd, the ladies homeward plied. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0102m.jpg" alt="0102m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0102.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + SHE, 'mong the three, who felt the most constraint + </p> + <p> + Ador'd a youth, contemporaries paint, + </p> + <p> + Well made and handsome, but with beardless chin, + </p> + <p> + Which led the pair a project to begin; + </p> + <p> + For yet no opportunity they'd found, + </p> + <p> + T' enjoy their wishes, save by stealth around; + </p> + <p> + Most ardently she sought to be at ease, + </p> + <p> + And 'twas agreed the lucky thought to seize + </p> + <p> + That like a chambermaid he should be dress'd, + </p> + <p> + And then proceed to execute the jest, + </p> + <p> + Attend upon the wily, wedded pair, + </p> + <p> + And offer services with modest air + </p> + <p> + And downcast eyes; the husband on her leer'd, + </p> + <p> + And in her favour prepossess'd appear'd, + </p> + <p> + In hopes one day, to find those pleasing charms + </p> + <p> + Resign'd in secret to his longing arms. + </p> + <p> + Such pretty cheeks and sparkling eyes he thought, + </p> + <p> + Had ne'er till then his roving fancy caught; + </p> + <p> + The girl was hir'd, but seemingly with pain, + </p> + <p> + Since PRUDENCE ultimately might complain, + </p> + <p> + That (maid and master both so very young) + </p> + <p> + 'Twould not be wonderful if things went wrong. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT first the husband inattention show'd, + </p> + <p> + And scarcely on the maid a look bestow'd; + </p> + <p> + But presently he chang'd his conduct quite, + </p> + <p> + And presents gave, with promises not slight; + </p> + <p> + At length the servant feign'd to lend an ear, + </p> + <p> + And anxious seem'd obliging to appear. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE trap our cunning lovers having laid, + </p> + <p> + One eve this message brought the smiling maid; + </p> + <p> + My lady, sir, is ill, and rest requires, + </p> + <p> + To sleep alone to-night she much desires. + </p> + <p> + To grant the master's wish the girl was led, + </p> + <p> + And they together hurried off to bed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE husband 'tween the sheets himself had plac'd; + </p> + <p> + The nymph was in her petticoat, unlac'd; + </p> + <p> + When suddenly appear'd the wily wife, + </p> + <p> + And promis'd harmony was turn'd to strife. + </p> + <p> + Are these your freaks, cried she with mark'd surprise; + </p> + <p> + Your usual dish it seems then don't suffice; + </p> + <p> + You want, indeed, to have some nicer fare? + </p> + <p> + A little sooner, by the saints I swear, + </p> + <p> + You'd me a pretty trick, 'tis clear, have shown, + </p> + <p> + And doubtless, then, tit bits to keep been prone. + </p> + <p> + This, howsoe'er, to get you're not design'd, + </p> + <p> + So elsewhere you may try what you can find. + </p> + <p> + And as to you, miss Prettyface, you jade, + </p> + <p> + Good heav'ns! to think a paltry servant maid + </p> + <p> + Should rival me? I'll beat you black and blue! + </p> + <p> + The bread I eat, indeed, must be for you? + </p> + <p> + But I know better, and indeed am clear, + </p> + <p> + Not one around will fancy I appear + </p> + <p> + So void of charms, so faded, wither'd, lost, + </p> + <p> + That I should out of doors at once be tost; + </p> + <p> + But I will manage matters:—I design + </p> + <p> + This girl no other bed shall have than mine; + </p> + <p> + Then who so bold to touch her there will dare? + </p> + <p> + Come, Miss, let's to my room at once repair; + </p> + <p> + Away—your things to-morrow you can seek; + </p> + <p> + If scandal 'twould spread around, I'd wreak + </p> + <p> + My vengeance instantly, and turn you out; + </p> + <p> + But I am lenient, and desire no rout; + </p> + <p> + Perhaps your ruin may be sav'd by care; + </p> + <p> + So night and day your company I'll share; + </p> + <p> + No more my bosom then will feel dismay, + </p> + <p> + For I shall see that you no frolicks play. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ON this the trembling girl, o'ercome with fears; + </p> + <p> + Held down her head and seem'd to hide her tears; + </p> + <p> + Pick'd up her clothes and quickly stole away, + </p> + <p> + As if afraid her mistress more might say; + </p> + <p> + And hop'd to act the maid while Sol gave light, + </p> + <p> + But play at ease the fond gallant at night; + </p> + <p> + At once she fill'd two places in the house, + </p> + <p> + And thought in both the husband she should chouse, + </p> + <p> + Who bless'd his stars that he'd escap'd so well, + </p> + <p> + And sneak'd alone to rest within his cell, + </p> + <p> + While our gay, am'rous pair advantage took, + </p> + <p> + To play at will, and ev'ry solace hook, + </p> + <p> + Convinc'd most thoroughly, once lovers kiss'd, + </p> + <p> + That OPPORTUNITY should n'er be miss'd. + </p> + <p> + Here ends the trick our wily gossip play'd; + </p> + <p> + But now let's see the plot another laid. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0106m.jpg" alt="0106m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0106.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + THE second dame, whose husband was so meek, + </p> + <p> + That only from her lips the truth he'd seek, + </p> + <p> + When seated with him 'neath a pear tree's shade, + </p> + <p> + Contriv'd at ease and her arrangement made. + </p> + <p> + The story I shall presently relate; + </p> + <p> + The butler, strong, well dress'd, and full of prate: + </p> + <p> + Who often made the other servants trot, + </p> + <p> + Stood near when madam hit upon her plot, + </p> + <p> + To whom she said, I wish the fruit to taste; + </p> + <p> + On which the man prepar'd with ev'ry haste, + </p> + <p> + To climb the tree, and off the produce shook; + </p> + <p> + But while above, the fellow gave a look + </p> + <p> + Upon the ground below, and feign'd he saw + </p> + <p> + The spouse and wife—do more than kiss and paw: + </p> + <p> + The servant rubb'd his eyes, as if in doubt, + </p> + <p> + And cried: why truly, sir, if you're so stout, + </p> + <p> + That you must revel 'mid your lady's charms, + </p> + <p> + Pray elsewhere take her to your longing arms, + </p> + <p> + Where you at ease may frolick hours or days, + </p> + <p> + Without my witnessing your loving ways; + </p> + <p> + Indeed, I'm quite surprised at what I spy + </p> + <p> + In publick, 'neath a tree such pranks to try! + </p> + <p> + And, if you don't a servant's presence heed, + </p> + <p> + With decency howe'er you should proceed. + </p> + <p> + What, still go on? for shame, I say, for shame! + </p> + <p> + Pray wait till by and by; you're much to blame; + </p> + <p> + Besides, the nights are long enough you'll find; + </p> + <p> + Heav'n genial joys for privacy design'd; + </p> + <p> + And why this place, when you've nice chambers got? + </p> + <p> + What, cried the lady, says this noisy sot? + </p> + <p> + He surely dreams; Where can he learn these tales? + </p> + <p> + Come down; let's see what 'tis the fellow ails. + </p> + <p> + Down William came. How? said the master, how? + </p> + <p> + Are we at play? <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0110m.jpg" alt="0110m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0110.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + WILLIAM <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + Not now, sir, no, not now. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HUSBAND <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + Why, when then, friend? <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WILLIAM <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + While I was in the tree, + </p> + <p> + Alive, sir, flay me, if I did not see + </p> + <p> + You on the verdant lawn my lady lay, + </p> + <p> + And kiss, and toy, and other frolicks play. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WIFE <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + 'Twere surely better if thou held'st thy tongue, + </p> + <p> + Or thou'lt a beating get before 'tis long. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HUSBAND <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + No, no, my dear, he's mad, and I design + </p> + <p> + The fellow in a madhouse to confine. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WILLIAM <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + Is't folly, pray, to see what we behold? <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WIFE <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + What hast thou seen? <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WILLIAM <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + What I've already told:— + </p> + <p> + My master and yourself at Cupid's game, + </p> + <p> + Or else the tree 's enchanted I proclaim. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WIFE <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ENCHANTED! nonsense; such a sight to see! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HUSBAND <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + To know the truth myself, I'll climb the tree, + </p> + <p> + Then you the fact will quickly from me learn; + </p> + <p> + We may believe what we ourselves discern. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SOON as the master they above descried, + </p> + <p> + And that below our pair he sharply eyed, + </p> + <p> + The butler took the lady in his arms, + </p> + <p> + And grew at once familiar with her charms; + </p> + <p> + At sight of this the husband gave a yell: + </p> + <p> + Made haste to reach the ground, and nearly fell; + </p> + <p> + Such liberties he wish'd at once to stop, + </p> + <p> + Since what he'd seen had nearly made him drop. + </p> + <p> + How! how!—cried he:—what, e'en before my sight? + </p> + <p> + What can you mean? said she without affright. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HUSBAND <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + DAR'ST thou to ask again? <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WIFE <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AND why not, pray? <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HUSBAND <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + FINE, pretty doings!—Presently you'll say; + </p> + <p> + That what I've seen 'tis folly to believe. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WIFE <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + Too much is this:—such accusations grieve. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HUSBAND <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + Thou did'st most clearly suffer his embrace. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WIFE <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + I? WHY, you dream! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HUSBAND <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + This seems a curious case. + </p> + <p> + MY reason's flown'! or have I lost my eyes? <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WIFE <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + CAN you suppose my character I prize + </p> + <p> + So very little, that these pranks I'd play + </p> + <p> + Before your face, when I might ev'ry day + </p> + <p> + Find minutes to divert myself at will, + </p> + <p> + And (if lik'd such frolicks) take my fill? <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HUSBAND <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + I KNOW not what to think nor what to do; + </p> + <p> + P'rhaps this same tree can tricks at will pursue; + </p> + <p> + Let's see again; aloft he went once more, + </p> + <p> + And William acted as he'd done before; + </p> + <p> + But now the husband saw the playful squeeze; + </p> + <p> + Without emotion, and returned at ease. + </p> + <p> + To find the cause, said he, no longer try, + </p> + <p> + The tree's enchanted, we may well rely. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SINCE, that's the fact, replied the cunning jade; + </p> + <p> + To burn it, quickly William seek fort aid; + </p> + <p> + The tree accurst no longer shall remain; + </p> + <p> + Her will the servant wish'd not to restrain, + </p> + <p> + But soon some workmen brought, who felled the tree; + </p> + <p> + And wondered what the fault our fair could see. + </p> + <p> + Down hew it, cried the lady, that's your task; + </p> + <p> + More concerns you not; folly 'tis to ask. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0116m.jpg" alt="0116m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0116.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + OUR second gossip thus obtained success; + </p> + <p> + But now the third: we'll see if she had less: + </p> + <p> + To female friends she often visits paid, + </p> + <p> + And various pastimes there had daily play'd; + </p> + <p> + A leering lover who was weary grown, + </p> + <p> + Desired ONE night she'd meet him quite alone. + </p> + <p> + TWO, if you will, replied the smiling fair; + </p> + <p> + A trifle 'tis you ask, and I'll repair + </p> + <p> + Where'er you wish, and we'll recline at ease; + </p> + <p> + My husband I can manage, if I please, + </p> + <p> + While thus engag'd.—The parties soon agreed; + </p> + <p> + But still the lady for her wits had need, + </p> + <p> + Since her dear man from home but rarely went, + </p> + <p> + No pardons sought at Rome, but was content + </p> + <p> + With what he nearer got, while his sweet wife + </p> + <p> + More fondness mark'd for gratifying life, + </p> + <p> + And ever anxious, warmest zeal to show, + </p> + <p> + Was always wishing distant scenes to know; + </p> + <p> + As pilgrim oft she'd trod a foreign road, + </p> + <p> + But now desir'd those ancient ways t'explode; + </p> + <p> + A plan more rare and difficult she sought, + </p> + <p> + And round her toe our wily dame bethought, + </p> + <p> + To tie a pack-thread, fasten'd to the door, + </p> + <p> + Which open'd to the street: then feign'd to snore + </p> + <p> + Beside her husband, Harry Berlinguier, + </p> + <p> + (So, usually, they nam'd her wedded dear.) <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HOWE'ER, so cunningly with him she dealt, + </p> + <p> + That Harry turn'd, and soon the pack-thread felt, + </p> + <p> + Which rais'd distrust, and led him to suspect + </p> + <p> + Some bad design the thread was meant t'effect. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A LITTLE time, as if asleep, he lay + </p> + <p> + Considering how to act, or what to say; + </p> + <p> + Then rose, (his spouse believing not awake,) + </p> + <p> + And softly treading, lest the room should shake; + </p> + <p> + The pack-thread follow'd to the outer door, + </p> + <p> + And thence concluded (what he might deplore,) + </p> + <p> + That his dear partner from her faith would stray, + </p> + <p> + And some gallant that night design'd to play + </p> + <p> + The lover's part and draw the secret clue, + </p> + <p> + When she would rise, and with him freaks pursue, + </p> + <p> + While he (good husband!) quietly in bed + </p> + <p> + Might sleep, not dreaming that his wife had fled. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + FOR otherwise, what use such pains to take? + </p> + <p> + A visit cuckoldom, perhaps, might make; + </p> + <p> + An honour that he'd willingly decline; + </p> + <p> + On which he studied how to countermine; + </p> + <p> + And like a sentinel mov'd to and fro', + </p> + <p> + To watch if any one would thither go + </p> + <p> + To pull the string, that he could see with ease, + </p> + <p> + And then he'd instantly the culprit seize. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE reader will perceive, we may suppose, + </p> + <p> + Besides the entrance which the husband chose, + </p> + <p> + On t'other side a door, where our gallant + </p> + <p> + Could enter readily, as he might want, + </p> + <p> + And there the spark a chambermaid let in:— + </p> + <p> + Oft servants prone are found a bribe to win. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHILE Berlinguier thus watch'd around and round; + </p> + <p> + The friends with one another pleasures found; + </p> + <p> + But heav'n alone knows how nor what they were:— + </p> + <p> + No fact transpir'd save all was free from care; + </p> + <p> + So well the servant kept the careful watch, + </p> + <p> + That not a chance was given the pair to catch: <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE spark at dawn the lady left alone, + </p> + <p> + And ere the husband came the bird was flown; + </p> + <p> + Then Harry, weary, took his place again, + </p> + <p> + Complaining, that he'd felt such racking pain, + </p> + <p> + And dreading, lest alarms her breast should seize, + </p> + <p> + Within another room he'd sought for ease. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + Two days had pass'd, when madam thought once more, + </p> + <p> + To set the thread, as she had done before; + </p> + <p> + He left the bed, pretending he was sick, + </p> + <p> + Resumed his post; again the lover came, + </p> + <p> + And, with my lady, play'd the former game. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE scheme so well succeeded, that the pair + </p> + <p> + Thrice wish'd to try the wily pack-thread snare; + </p> + <p> + The husband with the cholic mov'd away, + </p> + <p> + His place the bold gallant resum'd till day. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT length their ardour 'gan, it seems, to cool, + </p> + <p> + And Harry, they no longer tried to fool; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas time to seek the myst'ry of the plot, + </p> + <p> + Since, to three acts, the comedy was got. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT midnight, when the spark had left the bed; + </p> + <p> + A servant, by his orders, drew the thread; + </p> + <p> + On whom the husband, without fear, laid hold, + </p> + <p> + And with him enter'd like a soldier bold, + </p> + <p> + Not then supposing he'd a valet seiz'd; + </p> + <p> + Well tim'd it prov'd, howe'er;—the lady pleas'd + </p> + <p> + Her voice to raise, on hearing what was said, + </p> + <p> + And through the house confusion quickly spread. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE valet now before them bent the knee, + </p> + <p> + And openly declar'd, he came to see + </p> + <p> + The chambermaid, whom he was wont to greet, + </p> + <p> + And by the thread to rouse when time to meet: <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ARE these your knavish tricks, replied the dame, + </p> + <p> + With eyes upon her maid that darted flame; + </p> + <p> + When I by chance observ'd about your toe, + </p> + <p> + A thread one night, I then resolv'd to know + </p> + <p> + Your scheme in full, and round my own I tied + </p> + <p> + A clue, on which I thoroughly relied, + </p> + <p> + To catch this gay gallant, that you pretend + </p> + <p> + Your husband will become, I apprehend. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + Be that as 'twill, to-night from hence you go. + </p> + <p> + My dear, said Berlinguier, I'd fain say no; + </p> + <p> + Let things remain until to-morrow, pray + </p> + <p> + And then my lady presently gave way. + </p> + <p> + A fortune Harry on the girl bestow'd; + </p> + <p> + The like our valet to his master ow'd; + </p> + <p> + To church the happy couple smiling went:— + </p> + <p> + They'd known each other long, and were content. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THUS ended then, the third and last amour; + </p> + <p> + The trio hasten'd Macae to implore, + </p> + <p> + To say which gain'd the bet, who soon replied:— + </p> + <p> + I find it, friends, not easy to decide. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE case hangs up, and there will long remain; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis often thus when justice we'd obtain: <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Old_Man_Calendar" id="Old_Man_Calendar"></a>THE OLD MAN'S + CALENDAR + </h2> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0122m.jpg" alt="0122m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0122.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OFT have I seen in wedlock with surprise, + </p> + <p> + That most forgot from which true bliss would rise + </p> + <p> + When marriage for a daughter is designed, + </p> + <p> + The parents solely riches seem to mind; + </p> + <p> + All other boons are left to heav'n above, + </p> + <p> + And sweet SIXTEEN must SIXTY learn to love! + </p> + <p> + Yet still in other things they nicer seem, + </p> + <p> + Their chariot-horses and their oxen-team + </p> + <p> + Are truly matched;—in height exact are these, + </p> + <p> + While those each shade alike must have to please; + </p> + <p> + Without the choice 'twere wonderful to find, + </p> + <p> + Or coach or wagon travel to their mind. + </p> + <p> + The marriage journey full of cares appears, + </p> + <p> + When couples match in neither souls nor years! + </p> + <p> + An instance of the kind I'll now detail: + </p> + <p> + The feeling bosom will such lots bewail! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + QUINZICA, (Richard), as the story goes, + </p> + <p> + Indulged his wife at balls, and feasts, and shows, + </p> + <p> + Expecting other duties she'd forget, + </p> + <p> + In which howe'er he disappointment met. + </p> + <p> + A judge in Pisa, Richard was, it seems, + </p> + <p> + In law most learned: wily in his schemes; + </p> + <p> + But silver beard and locks too clearly told, + </p> + <p> + He ought to have a wife of diff'rent mould; + </p> + <p> + Though he had taken one of noble birth, + </p> + <p> + Quite young, most beautiful, and formed for mirth, + </p> + <p> + Bartholomea Galandi her name; + </p> + <p> + The lady's parents were of rank and fame; + </p> + <p> + Our JUDGE herein had little wisdom shown, + </p> + <p> + And sneering friends around were often known + </p> + <p> + To say, his children ne'er could fathers lack: + </p> + <p> + At giving counsel some have got a knack, + </p> + <p> + Who, were they but at home to turn their eyes, + </p> + <p> + Might find, perhaps, they're not so over-wise. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + QUINZICA, then perceiving that his pow'rs + </p> + <p> + Fell short of what a bird like his devours, + </p> + <p> + T'excuse himself and satisfy his dear, + </p> + <p> + Pretended that, no day within the year, + </p> + <p> + To Hymen, as a saint, was e'er assigned, + </p> + <p> + In calendar, or book of any kind, + </p> + <p> + When full ATTENTION to the god was paid:— + </p> + <p> + To aged sires a nice convenient aid; + </p> + <p> + But this the sex by no means fancy right; + </p> + <p> + Few days to PLEASURE could his heart invite + </p> + <p> + At times, the week entire he'd have a fast; + </p> + <p> + At others, say the day 'mong saints was classed, + </p> + <p> + Though no one ever heard its holy name;— + </p> + <p> + FAST ev'ry Friday—Saturday the same, + </p> + <p> + Since Sunday followed, consecrated day; + </p> + <p> + Then Monday came:—still he'd abstain from play; + </p> + <p> + Each morning find excuse, but solemn feasts + </p> + <p> + Were days most sacred held by all the priests; + </p> + <p> + On abstinence, then, Richard lectures read, + </p> + <p> + And long before the time, was always led + </p> + <p> + By sense of right, from dainties to refrain: + </p> + <p> + A period afterward would also gain; + </p> + <p> + The like observed before and after Lent; + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry feast had got the same extent; + </p> + <p> + These times were gracious for our aged man; + </p> + <p> + And never pass them was his constant plan. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OF patron saints he always had a list; + </p> + <p> + Th' evangelists, apostles, none he miss'd; + </p> + <p> + And that his scruples might have constant food; + </p> + <p> + Some days malign, he said, were understood; + </p> + <p> + Then foggy weather;—dog-days' fervent heat: + </p> + <p> + To seek excuses he was most complete, + </p> + <p> + And ne'er asham'd but manag'd things so well, + </p> + <p> + Four times a year, by special grace, they tell, + </p> + <p> + Our sage regal'd his youthful blooming wife, + </p> + <p> + A little with the sweets of marriage life. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WITH this exception he was truly kind, + </p> + <p> + Fine dresses, jewels, all to please her mind; + </p> + <p> + But these are bawbles which alone controul + </p> + <p> + Those belles, like dolls, mere bodies void of soul. + </p> + <p> + Bartholomea was of diff'rent clay; + </p> + <p> + Her only pleasure (as our hist'ries say), + </p> + <p> + To go in summer to the neighb'ring coast, + </p> + <p> + Where her good spouse a charming house could boast, + </p> + <p> + In which they took their lodging once a week; + </p> + <p> + At times they pleasure on the waves would seek, + </p> + <p> + As fishing with the lady would agree, + </p> + <p> + And she was wond'rous partial to the sea, + </p> + <p> + Though far to sail they always would refuse. + </p> + <p> + One day it happened better to amuse, + </p> + <p> + Our couple diff'rent fishing vessels took, + </p> + <p> + And skimm'd the wave to try who most could hook, + </p> + <p> + Of fish and pleasure; and they laid a bet, + </p> + <p> + The greatest number which of them should get. + </p> + <p> + On board they had a man or two at most. + </p> + <p> + And each the best adventure hop'd to boast. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A CERTAIN pirate soon observ'd the ship, + </p> + <p> + In which this charming lady made the trip, + </p> + <p> + And presently attack'd and seiz'd the same; + </p> + <p> + But Richard's bark to shore in safety came; + </p> + <p> + So near the land, or else he would not brave, + </p> + <p> + To any great extent, the stormy wave, + </p> + <p> + Or that the robber thought if both he took, + </p> + <p> + He could not decently for favours look, + </p> + <p> + And he preferr'd those joys the FAIR bestow, + </p> + <p> + To all the riches which to mortals flow. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ALTHOUGH a pirate, he had always shown + </p> + <p> + Much honour in his acts, as well was known; + </p> + <p> + But Cupid's frolicks were his heart's delight: + </p> + <p> + None truly brave can ever beauty slight; + </p> + <p> + A sailor's always bold and kind and free, + </p> + <p> + Good lib'ral fellows, such they'll ever be; + </p> + <p> + 'Mong saints indeed 'twere vain their names to seek! + </p> + <p> + The man was good howe'er of whom we speak; + </p> + <p> + His usual name was Pagamin Montegue; + </p> + <p> + For hours the lady's screams were heard a league, + </p> + <p> + While he each minute anxiously would seize, + </p> + <p> + To cheer her spirits and her heart to please; + </p> + <p> + T'attain his wish he ev'ry art combined; + </p> + <p> + At length the lovely captive all resigned. + </p> + <p> + 'Twas Cupid conquer'd, Cupid with his dart; + </p> + <p> + A thousand times more pirate in his art, + </p> + <p> + Than Pagamin; on bleeding hearts he preys, + </p> + <p> + But little quarter gives, nor grace displays: + </p> + <p> + To pay her ransom she'd enough of gold; + </p> + <p> + For this her spouse was truly never cold; + </p> + <p> + No fast nor festival therein appear'd, + </p> + <p> + And her captivity he greatly fear'd. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS calendar o'erspread with rubrick days; + </p> + <p> + She soon forgot and learn'd the pirate's ways; + </p> + <p> + The matrimonial zone aside was thrown, + </p> + <p> + And only mentioned where the fact was known: <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR lawyer would his fingers sooner burn; + </p> + <p> + Than have his wife but virtuous home return; + </p> + <p> + By means of gold he entertain'd no doubt, + </p> + <p> + Her restoration might be brought about. + </p> + <p> + A passport from the pirate he obtain'd, + </p> + <p> + Then waited on him and his wish explain'd; + </p> + <p> + To pay he offer'd what soe'er he'd ask; + </p> + <p> + His terms accept, though hard perhaps the task; <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE robber answer'd, if my name around, + </p> + <p> + Be not for honourable acts renown'd, + </p> + <p> + 'Tis quite unjust:—your partner I'll restore + </p> + <p> + In health, without a ransom:—would you more? + </p> + <p> + A friendship so respect'd, heav'n forefend! + </p> + <p> + Should ever, by my conduct, have an end. + </p> + <p> + The fair, whom you so ardently admire, + </p> + <p> + Shall to your arms return as you desire, + </p> + <p> + Such pleasure to a friend I would not sell; + </p> + <p> + Convince me that she's your's, and all is well; + </p> + <p> + For if another I to you should give, + </p> + <p> + (And many that I've taken with me live,) + </p> + <p> + I surely should incur a heavy blame; + </p> + <p> + I lately captur'd one, a charming dame, + </p> + <p> + With auburn locks, a little fat, tall, young; + </p> + <p> + If she declare she does to you belong, + </p> + <p> + When you she's seen, I will the belle concede; + </p> + <p> + You'll take her instantly; I'll not impede. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0140m.jpg" alt="0140m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0140.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + THE sage replied, your conduct's truly wise; + </p> + <p> + Such wond'rous kindness fills me with surprise; + </p> + <p> + But since 'tis said that every trade must live, + </p> + <p> + The sum just mention:—I'll the ransom give; + </p> + <p> + No compliment I wish, my purse behold + </p> + <p> + You know the money presently is told; + </p> + <p> + Consider me a stranger now I pray; + </p> + <p> + With you I'd equal probity display, + </p> + <p> + And so will act, I swear, as you shall see; + </p> + <p> + There 's not a doubt the fair will go with me; + </p> + <p> + My word for this I would not have you take:— + </p> + <p> + You'll see how happy 'twill the lady make + </p> + <p> + To find me here; to my embrace she'll fly; + </p> + <p> + My only fears—that she of joy will die. + </p> + <p> + To them the charmer now was instant brought, + </p> + <p> + Who eyed her husband as beneath a thought; + </p> + <p> + Received him coldly, just as if he'd been + </p> + <p> + A stranger from Peru, she ne'er had seen. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + LOOK, said Quinzica, she's ashamed 'tis plain + </p> + <p> + So many lookers on her love restrain; + </p> + <p> + But be assured, if we were left alone, + </p> + <p> + Around my neck her arms would soon be thrown. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IF this, replied the pirate, you believe, + </p> + <p> + Attend her toilet:—naught can then deceive. + </p> + <p> + Away they went, and closely shut the door; + </p> + <p> + When Richard said, thou darling of my store, + </p> + <p> + How can'st thou thus behave? my pretty dove, + </p> + <p> + 'Tis thy Quinzica, come to seek his love, + </p> + <p> + In all the same, except about his wife; + </p> + <p> + Dost in this face a change observe my life? + </p> + <p> + 'Tis grieving for thy loss that makes me ill; + </p> + <p> + Did ever I in aught deny thy will? + </p> + <p> + In dress or play could any thee exceed? + </p> + <p> + And had'st thou not whatever thou might'st need? + </p> + <p> + To please thee, oft I made myself a slave; + </p> + <p> + Such thou art now; but thee again I crave. + </p> + <p> + Then what dost think about thy honour, dear?— + </p> + <p> + Said she, with ire, I neither know nor fear; + </p> + <p> + Is this a time to guard it, do you say? + </p> + <p> + What pain was shown by any one, I pray; + </p> + <p> + When I was forc'd to wed a man like you, + </p> + <p> + Old, impotent, and hateful to the view, + </p> + <p> + While I was young and blooming as the morn, + </p> + <p> + Deserving truly, something less forlorn, + </p> + <p> + And seemingly intended to possess + </p> + <p> + What Hymen best in store has got to bless; + </p> + <p> + For I was thought by all the world around, + </p> + <p> + Most worthy ev'ry bliss in wedlock found. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + YET things took quite another turn with me + </p> + <p> + In tune my husband never proved to be, + </p> + <p> + Except a feast or two throughout the year; + </p> + <p> + From Pagamin I met a diff'rent cheer; + </p> + <p> + Another lesson presently he taught; + </p> + <p> + The life's sweet pleasures more the pirate brought, + </p> + <p> + In two short days, than e'er I had from you + </p> + <p> + In those four years that only you I knew. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + PRAY leave me husband:—let me have my will + </p> + <p> + Insist not on my living with you still; + </p> + <p> + No calendars with Pagamin are seen— + </p> + <p> + Far better treated with the man I've been. + </p> + <p> + My other friends and you much worse deserved: + </p> + <p> + The spouse, for taking me when quite unnerved, + </p> + <p> + And they, for giving preference base to gold, + </p> + <p> + To those pure joys—far better thought than told. + </p> + <p> + But Pagamin in ev'ry way can please; + </p> + <p> + And though no code he owns, yet all is ease; + </p> + <p> + Himself will tell you what has passed this morn, + </p> + <p> + His actions would a sov'reign prince adorn. + </p> + <p> + Such information may excite surprise, + </p> + <p> + But now the truth, 'twere useless to disguise, + </p> + <p> + Nothing will gain belief, we've no one near + </p> + <p> + To witness our discourse:—adieu, my dear, + </p> + <p> + To all your festivals—I'm flesh and blood:— + </p> + <p> + Gems, dresses, ornaments, do little good; + </p> + <p> + You know full well, betwixt the head and heel, + </p> + <p> + Though little's said, yet much we often feel. + </p> + <p> + On this she stopt, and Richard dropt his chin, + </p> + <p> + Rejoiced to 'scape from such unwelcome din. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BARTHOLOMEA, pleased with what had passed; + </p> + <p> + No disposition showed to hold him fast; + </p> + <p> + The downcast husband felt such poignant grief, + </p> + <p> + With ills where age can scarcely hope relief, + </p> + <p> + That soon he left this busy stage of life, + </p> + <p> + And Pagamin the widow took to wife. + </p> + <p> + The deed was just, for neither of the two + </p> + <p> + E'er felt what oft in Richard rose to view; + </p> + <p> + From feeling proof arose their mutual choice; + </p> + <p> + And 'tween them ne'er was heard the jarring voice. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BEHOLD a lesson for the aged man; + </p> + <p> + Who thinks, when old, to act as he began; + </p> + <p> + But, if the sage a yielding dotard seems, + </p> + <p> + His work is done by those the wife esteems; + </p> + <p> + Complaints are never heard; no thrilling fears; + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry one around at ease appears. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + + <p> + <a name="p85" id="p85"></a><img alt="p85.jpg (44K)" src="images/p85.jpg" + height="505" width="656" /> + </p> + + <h2> + <a name="Avaricious_Wife" id="Avaricious_Wife"></a>THE AVARICIOUS WIFE + AND TRICKING GALLANT + </h2><p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">W</span>HO knows the world will never feel surprise, + </p> + <p> + When men are duped by artful women's eyes; + </p> + <p> + Though death his weapon freely will unfold; + </p> + <p> + Love's pranks, we find, are ever ruled by gold. + </p> + <p> + To vain coquettes I doubtless here allude; + </p> + <p> + But spite of arts with which they're oft endued; + </p> + <p> + I hope to show (our honour to maintain,) + </p> + <p> + We can, among a hundred of the train, + </p> + <p> + Catch one at least, and play some cunning trick:— + </p> + <p> + For instance, take blithe Gulphar's wily nick, + </p> + <p> + Who gained (old soldier-like) his ardent aim, + </p> + <p> + And gratis got an avaricious dame. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + LOOK well at this, ye heroes of the sword, + </p> + <p> + Howe'er with wily freaks your heads be stored, + </p> + <p> + Beyond a doubt, at court I now could find, + </p> + <p> + A host of lovers of the Gulphar kind. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0144m.jpg" alt="0144m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0144.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + To Gasperin's so often went our wight, + </p> + <p> + The wife at length became his sole delight, + </p> + <p> + Whose youth and beauty were by all confessed; + </p> + <p> + But, 'midst these charms, such av'rice she possessed, + </p> + <p> + The warmest love was checked—a thing not rare, + </p> + <p> + In modern times at least, among the FAIR. + </p> + <p> + 'Tis true, as I've already said, with such + </p> + <p> + Sighs naught avail, and promises not much; + </p> + <p> + Without a purse, who wishes should express, + </p> + <p> + Would vainly hope to gain a soft caress. + </p> + <p> + The god of love no other charm employs, + </p> + <p> + Then cards, and dress, and pleasure's cheering joys; + </p> + <p> + From whose gay shops more cuckolds we behold, + </p> + <p> + Than heroes sallied from Troy's horse of old. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BUT to our lady's humour let's adhere; + </p> + <p> + Sighs passed for naught: they entered not her ear; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas speaking only would the charmer please, + </p> + <p> + The reader, without doubt, my meaning sees; + </p> + <p> + Gay Gulphar plainly spoke, and named a sum + </p> + <p> + A hundred pounds, she listened:—was o'ercome. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR wight the cash by Gasperin was lent; + </p> + <p> + And then the husband to the country went, + </p> + <p> + Without suspecting that his loving mate, + </p> + <p> + Designed with horns to ornament his pate. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE money artful Gulphar gave the dame, + </p> + <p> + While friends were round who could observe the same; + </p> + <p> + Here, said the spark, a hundred pounds receive, + </p> + <p> + 'Tis for your spouse:—the cash with you I leave. + </p> + <p> + The lady fancied what the swain had said, + </p> + <p> + Was policy, and to concealment led. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0146m.jpg" alt="0146m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0146.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + NEXT morn our belle regaled the arch gallant, + </p> + <p> + Fulfilled his promise:—and his eager want. + </p> + <p> + Day after day he followed up the game; + </p> + <p> + For cash he took, and int'rest on the same; + </p> + <p> + Good payers get, we always may conclude, + </p> + <p> + Full measure served, whatever is pursued. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN Gasperin returned, our crafty wight, + </p> + <p> + Before the wife addressed her spouse at sight; + </p> + <p> + Said he the cash I've to your lady paid, + </p> + <p> + Not having (as I feared) required its aid; + </p> + <p> + To save mistakes, pray cross it in your book; + </p> + <p> + The lady, thunderstruck, with terror shook; + </p> + <p> + Allowed the payment; 'twas a case too clear; + </p> + <p> + In truth for character she 'gan to fear. + </p> + <p> + But most howe'er she grudged the surplus joy, + </p> + <p> + Bestowed on such a vile, deceitful boy. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE loss was doubtless great in ev'ry view + </p> + <p> + Around the town the wicked Gulphar flew; + </p> + <p> + In all the streets, at every house to tell, + </p> + <p> + How nicely he had trick'd the greedy belle. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + To blame him useless 'twere you must allow; + </p> + <p> + The French such frolicks readily avow. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Jealous_Husband" id="Jealous_Husband"></a>THE JEALOUS HUSBAND + </h2><p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">A</span> CERTAIN husband who, from jealous fear, + </p> + <p> + With one eye slept while t'other watched his dear, + </p> + <p> + Deprived his wife of every social joy, + </p> + <p> + (Friends oft the jealous character annoy,) + </p> + <p> + And made a fine collection in a book, + </p> + <p> + Of tricks with which the sex their wishes hook. + </p> + <p> + Strange fool! as if their wiles, to speak the truth, + </p> + <p> + Were not a hydra, both in age and youth. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HIS wife howe'er engaged his constant cares; + </p> + <p> + He counted e'en the number of her hairs; + </p> + <p> + And kept a hag who followed every hour, + </p> + <p> + Where'er she went, each motion to devour; + </p> + <p> + Duenna like, true semblance of a shade, + </p> + <p> + That never quits, yet moves as if afraid. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS arch collection, like a prayer-book bound; + </p> + <p> + Was in the blockhead's pocket always found, + </p> + <p> + The form religious of the work, he thought, + </p> + <p> + Would prove a charm 'gainst vice whenever sought! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ONE holy day, it happened that our dame, + </p> + <p> + As from the neighb'ring church she homeward came; + </p> + <p> + And passed a house, some wight, concealed from view; + </p> + <p> + A basket full of filth upon her threw. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WITH anxious care apologies were made; + </p> + <p> + The lady, frightened by the frolick played, + </p> + <p> + Quite unsuspicious to the mansion went; + </p> + <p> + Her aged friend for other clothes she sent, + </p> + <p> + Who hurried home, and ent'ring out of breath; + </p> + <p> + Informed old hunks—what pained him more than death <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ZOUNDS! cried the latter, vainly I may look + </p> + <p> + To find a case like this within my book; + </p> + <p> + A dupe I'm made, and nothing can be worse:— + </p> + <p> + Hell seize the work—'tis thoroughly a curse! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0158m.jpg" alt="0158m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0158.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + NOT wrong he proved, for, truly to confess; + </p> + <p> + This throwing dirt upon the lady's dress + </p> + <p> + Was done to get the hag, with Argus' eyes + </p> + <p> + Removed a certain distance from the prize. + </p> + <p> + The gay gallant, who watched the lucky hour, + </p> + <p> + Felt doubly blessed to have her in his power. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HOW vain our schemes to guard the wily sex! + </p> + <p> + Oft plots we find, that ev'ry sense perplex. + </p> + <p> + Go, jealous husbands, books of cases burn; + </p> + <p> + Caresses lavish, and you'll find return. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Gascon_Punished" id="Gascon_Punished"></a>THE GASCON PUNISHED + </h2><p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">A</span> GASCON (being heard one day to swear, + </p> + <p> + That he'd possess'd a certain lovely fair,) + </p> + <p> + Was played a wily trick, and nicely served; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas clear, from truth he shamefully had swerved: + </p> + <p> + But those who scandal propagate below, + </p> + <p> + Are prophets thought, and ev'ry action know; + </p> + <p> + While good, if spoken, scarcely is believed, + </p> + <p> + And must be viewed, or not for truth received. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE dame, indeed, the Gascon only jeered, + </p> + <p> + And e'er denied herself when he appeared; + </p> + <p> + But when she met the wight, who sought to shine; + </p> + <p> + And called her angel, beauteous and divine, + </p> + <p> + She fled and hastened to a female friend, + </p> + <p> + Where she could laugh, and at her ease unbend. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NEAR Phillis, (our fair fugitive) there dwelled + </p> + <p> + One Eurilas, his nearest neighbour held; + </p> + <p> + His wife was Cloris; 'twas with her our dove + </p> + <p> + Took shelter from the Gascon's forward love, + </p> + <p> + Whose name was Dorilas; and Damon young, + </p> + <p> + (The Gascon's friend) on whom gay Cloris hung. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SWEET Phillis, by her manner, you might see, + </p> + <p> + From sly amours and dark intrigues was free; + </p> + <p> + The value to possess her no one knew, + </p> + <p> + Though all admired the lovely belle at view. + </p> + <p> + Just twenty years she counted at the time, + </p> + <p> + And now a widow was, though in her prime, + </p> + <p> + (Her spouse, an aged dotard, worth a plum:— + </p> + <p> + Of those whose loss to mourn no tears e'er come.) <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR seraph fair, such loveliness possessed, + </p> + <p> + In num'rous ways a Gascon could have blessed; + </p> + <p> + Above, below, appeared angelic charms; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas Paradise, 'twas Heav'n, within her arms! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE Gascon was—a Gascon;—would you more? + </p> + <p> + Who knows a Gascon knows at least a score. + </p> + <p> + I need not say what solemn vows he made; + </p> + <p> + Alike with Normans Gascons are portrayed; + </p> + <p> + Their oaths, indeed, won't pass for Gospel truth; + </p> + <p> + But we believe that Dorilas (the youth) + </p> + <p> + Loved Phillis to his soul, our lady fair, + </p> + <p> + Yet he would fain be thought successful there. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ONE day, said Phillis, with unusual glee, + </p> + <p> + Pretending with the Gascon to be free:— + </p> + <p> + A favour do me:—nothing very great; + </p> + <p> + Assist to dupe one jealous of his mate; + </p> + <p> + You'll find it very easy to be done, + </p> + <p> + And doubtless 'twill produce a deal of fun. + </p> + <p> + 'Tis our request (the plot you'll say is deep,) + </p> + <p> + That you this night with Cloris's husband sleep + </p> + <p> + Some disagreement with her gay gallant + </p> + <p> + Requires, that she a night at least should grant, + </p> + <p> + To settle diff'rences; now we desire, + </p> + <p> + That you'll to bed with Eurilas retire, + </p> + <p> + There's not a doubt he'll think his Cloris near; + </p> + <p> + He never touches her:—so nothing fear; + </p> + <p> + For whether jealousy, or other pains, + </p> + <p> + He constantly from intercourse abstains, + </p> + <p> + Snores through the night, and, if a cap he sees, + </p> + <p> + Believes his wife in bed, and feels at ease. + </p> + <p> + We'll properly equip you as a belle, + </p> + <p> + And I will certainly reward you well. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TO gain but Phillis's smiles, the Gascon said, + </p> + <p> + He'd with the very devil go to bed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE night arrived, our wight the chamber traced; + </p> + <p> + The lights extinguished; Eurilas, too, placed; + </p> + <p> + The Gascon 'gan to tremble in a trice, + </p> + <p> + And soon with terror grew as cold as ice; + </p> + <p> + Durst neither spit nor cough; still less encroach; + </p> + <p> + And seemed to shrink, least t'other should approach; + </p> + <p> + Crept near the edge; would scarcely room afford, + </p> + <p> + And could have passed the scabbard of a sword. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OFT in the night his bed-fellow turned round; + </p> + <p> + At length a finger on his nose he found, + </p> + <p> + Which Dorilas exceedingly distressed; + </p> + <p> + But more inquietude was in his breast, + </p> + <p> + For fear the husband amorous should grow, + </p> + <p> + From which incalculable ills might flow. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR Gascon ev'ry minute knew alarm; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas now a leg stretched out, and then an arm; + </p> + <p> + He even thought he felt the husband's beard; + </p> + <p> + But presently arrived what more he feared. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A BELL, conveniently, was near the bed, + </p> + <p> + Which Eurilas to ring was often led; + </p> + <p> + At this the Gascon swooned, so great his fear, + </p> + <p> + And swore, for ever he'd renounce his dear. + </p> + <p> + But no one coming, Eurilas, once more, + </p> + <p> + Resumed his place, and 'gan again to snore. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT length, before the sun his head had reared; + </p> + <p> + The door was opened, and a torch appeared. + </p> + <p> + Misfortune then he fancied full in sight; + </p> + <p> + More pleased he'd been to rise without a light, + </p> + <p> + And clearly thought 'twas over with him now; + </p> + <p> + The flame approached;—the drops ran o'er his brow; + </p> + <p> + With terror he for pardon humbly prayed:— + </p> + <p> + You have it, cried a fair: be not dismayed; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas Phillis spoke, who Eurilas's place + </p> + <p> + Had filled, throughout the night, with wily grace, + </p> + <p> + And now to Damon and his Cloris flew, + </p> + <p> + With ridicule the Gascon to pursue; + </p> + <p> + Recounted all the terrors and affright, + </p> + <p> + Which Dorilas had felt throughout the night. + </p> + <p> + To mortify still more the silly swain, + </p> + <p> + And fill his soul with ev'ry poignant pain, + </p> + <p> + She gave a glimpse of beauties to his view, + </p> + <p> + And from his presence instantly withdrew. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Princess_Bethrothed" id="Princess_Bethrothed"></a>THE PRINCESS + BETROTHED TO THE + </h2> + <h2> + KING OF GARBA + </h2><p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">W</span>HAT various ways in which a thing is told + </p> + <p> + Some truth abuse, while others fiction hold; + </p> + <p> + In stories we invention may admit; + </p> + <p> + But diff'rent 'tis with what historick writ; + </p> + <p> + Posterity demands that truth should then + </p> + <p> + Inspire relation, and direct the pen. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ALACIEL'S story's of another kind, + </p> + <p> + And I've a little altered it, you'll find; + </p> + <p> + Faults some may see, and others disbelieve; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis all the same:—'twill never make me grieve; + </p> + <p> + Alaciel's mem'ry, it is very clear, + </p> + <p> + Can scarcely by it lose; there's naught to fear. + </p> + <p> + Two facts important I have kept in view, + </p> + <p> + In which the author fully I pursue; + </p> + <p> + The one—no less than eight the belle possessed, + </p> + <p> + Before a husband's sight her eyes had blessed; + </p> + <p> + The other is, the prince she was to wed + </p> + <p> + Ne'er seemed to heed this trespass on his bed, + </p> + <p> + But thought, perhaps, the beauty she had got + </p> + <p> + Would prove to any one a happy lot. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HOWE'ER this fair, amid adventures dire, + </p> + <p> + More sufferings shared than malice could desire; + </p> + <p> + Though eight times, doubtless, she exchanged her knight + </p> + <p> + No proof, that she her spouse was led to slight; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas gratitude, compassion, or good will; + </p> + <p> + The dread of worse;—she'd truly had her fill; + </p> + <p> + Excuses just, to vindicate her fame, + </p> + <p> + Who, spite of troubles, fanned the monarch's flame: + </p> + <p> + Of eight the relict, still a maid received;— + </p> + <p> + Apparently, the prince her pure believed; + </p> + <p> + For, though at times we may be duped in this, + </p> + <p> + Yet, after such a number—strange to miss! + </p> + <p> + And I submit to those who've passed the scene, + </p> + <p> + If they, to my opinion, do not lean. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE king of Alexandria, Zarus named, + </p> + <p> + A daughter had, who all his fondness claimed, + </p> + <p> + A star divine Alaciel shone around, + </p> + <p> + The charms of beauty's queen were in her found; + </p> + <p> + With soul celestial, gracious, good, and kind, + </p> + <p> + And all-accomplished, all-complying mind. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE rumour of her worth spread far and wide, + </p> + <p> + The king of Garba asked her for his bride, + </p> + <p> + And Mamolin (the sov'reign of the spot,) + </p> + <p> + To other princes had a pref'rence got. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE fair, howe'er, already felt the smart + </p> + <p> + Of Cupid's arrow, and had lost her heart; + </p> + <p> + But 'twas not known: princesses love conceal, + </p> + <p> + And scarcely dare its whispers fond reveal; + </p> + <p> + Within their bosoms poignant pain remains, + </p> + <p> + Though flesh and blood, like lasses of the plains. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE noble Hispal, one of zarus' court, + </p> + <p> + A handsome youth, as histories report, + </p> + <p> + Alaciel pleased; a mutual flame arose, + </p> + <p> + Though this they durst not venture to disclose + </p> + <p> + Or, if expressed, 'twas solely by the eyes:— + </p> + <p> + Soul-speaking language, nothing can disguise! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AFFIANCED thus, the princess, with a sigh, + </p> + <p> + Prepared to part, and fully to comply. + </p> + <p> + The father trusted her to Hispal's care, + </p> + <p> + Without the least suspicion of the snare; + </p> + <p> + They soon embarked and ploughed the briny main; + </p> + <p> + With anxious hopes in time the port to gain. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN they, from Egypt's coast had sailed a week; + </p> + <p> + To gain the wind they saw a pirate seek, + </p> + <p> + Which having done, he t'wards them bore in haste, + </p> + <p> + To take the ship in which our fair was placed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE battle quickly raged; alike they erred; + </p> + <p> + The pirates slaughter loved, and blood preferred, + </p> + <p> + And, long accustomed to the stormy tide, + </p> + <p> + Were most expert, and on their skill relied. + </p> + <p> + In numbers, too, superior they were found; + </p> + <p> + But Hisipal's valour greatly shone around, + </p> + <p> + And kept the combat undecided long; + </p> + <p> + At length Grifonio, wond'rous large and strong; + </p> + <p> + With twenty sturdy, pirates got on board, + </p> + <p> + And many soon lay gasping by the sword. + </p> + <p> + Where'er he trod, grim death and horrour reigned; + </p> + <p> + At length, the round the noble Hispal gained. + </p> + <p> + His nervous arm laid many wretches low + </p> + <p> + Rage marked his eyes, whene'er he dealt a blow: <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BUT, while the youth was thus engaged in fight, + </p> + <p> + Grifonio ran to gain a sweeter sight; + </p> + <p> + The princess was on board full well he knew; + </p> + <p> + No time he lost, but to her chamber flew; + </p> + <p> + And, since his pleasures seemed to be her doom; + </p> + <p> + He bore her like a sparrow from the room: + </p> + <p> + But not content with such a charming fair, + </p> + <p> + He took her diamonds, ornaments for hair, + </p> + <p> + And those dear pledges ladies oft receive, + </p> + <p> + When they a lover's ardent flame believe. + </p> + <p> + Indeed, I've heard it hinted as a truth, + </p> + <p> + (And very probable for such a youth,) + </p> + <p> + That Hispal, while on board, his flame revealed; + </p> + <p> + And what chagrin she felt was then concealed, + </p> + <p> + The passage thinking an improper time, + </p> + <p> + To shew a marked displeasure at his crime. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE pirate-chief who carried off his prey, + </p> + <p> + Had short-lived joy, for, wishing to convey + </p> + <p> + His charming captive from the ship with speed; + </p> + <p> + One vessel chanced a little to recede, + </p> + <p> + Although securely fastened by the crew, + </p> + <p> + With grappling hooks, as usually they do, + </p> + <p> + When quite intent to pass, young Hispal made + </p> + <p> + A blow, that dead at once the ruffian laid; + </p> + <p> + His head and shoulders, severed from the trunk; + </p> + <p> + Fell in the sea, and to the bottom sunk, + </p> + <p> + Abjuring Mahomet, and all the tribe + </p> + <p> + Of idle prophets, Catholics proscribe; + </p> + <p> + Erect the rest upon the legs remained; + </p> + <p> + The very posture as before retained; + </p> + <p> + This curious sight no doubt a laugh had raised,— + </p> + <p> + But in the moment, she, so lately praised, + </p> + <p> + With dread Grifonio, fell beyond their view; + </p> + <p> + To save her, straight the gallant Hispal flew. + </p> + <p> + The ships, for want of pilots at the helm, + </p> + <p> + At random drifted over Neptune's realm. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + GRIM death the pirate forced to quit his slave; + </p> + <p> + Buoyed up by clothes, she floated on the wave, + </p> + <p> + 'Till Hispal succour lent, who saw 'twas vain + </p> + <p> + To try with her the vessel to regain. + </p> + <p> + He could, with greater ease, the fair convey + </p> + <p> + To certain rocks, and thither bent his way; + </p> + <p> + Those rocks to sailors oft destruction proved, + </p> + <p> + But now the couple saved, who thither moved: + </p> + <p> + 'Tis even said the jewels were not lost, + </p> + <p> + But sweet Alaciel, howsoever tost, + </p> + <p> + Preserved the caskets, which with strings were tied; + </p> + <p> + And seizing these, the treasure drew aside. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR swimmer on his back the princess bore; + </p> + <p> + The rock attained; but hardships were not o'er; + </p> + <p> + Misfortunes dire the noble pair pursued + </p> + <p> + And famine, worst of ills, around was viewed. + </p> + <p> + No ship was near; the light soon passed away; + </p> + <p> + The night the same; again appeared the day; + </p> + <p> + No vessel hove in sight; no food to eat; + </p> + <p> + Our couple's wretchedness seemed now complete; + </p> + <p> + Hope left them both, and, mutual passion moved, + </p> + <p> + Their situation more tormenting proved. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + LONG time in silence they each other eyed + </p> + <p> + At length, to speak the lovely charmer tried + </p> + <p> + Said she, 'tis useless, Hispal, to bewail: + </p> + <p> + Tears, with the cruel Parcae, naught avail; + </p> + <p> + Each other to console be now our aim; + </p> + <p> + Grim death his course will follow still the same. + </p> + <p> + To mitigate the smart let's try anew; + </p> + <p> + In such a place as this few joys accrue. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + CONSOLE each other, say you? Hispal cried; + </p> + <p> + What can console when forced one's love to hide? + </p> + <p> + Besides, fair princess, ev'ry way 'tis clear, + </p> + <p> + Improper 'twere for you to love while here; + </p> + <p> + I equally could death or famine brave; + </p> + <p> + But you I tremble for, and wish to save. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THESE words so pained the fair, that gushing tears + </p> + <p> + Bedewed Alaciel's cheeks, her looks spoke fears; + </p> + <p> + The ardent flame which she'd so long concealed; + </p> + <p> + Burst forth in sighs, and all its warmth revealed; + </p> + <p> + While such emotion Hispal's eyes expressed, + </p> + <p> + That more than words his anxious wish confessed. + </p> + <p> + These tender scenes were followed by a kiss, + </p> + <p> + The prelude sweet of soft enchanting bliss; + </p> + <p> + But whether taken, or by choice bestowed, + </p> + <p> + Alike 'twas clear, their heaving bosoms glowed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THOSE vows now o'er, said Hispal with a sigh, + </p> + <p> + In this adventure, if we're doomed to die, + </p> + <p> + Indiff'rent surely 'tis, the prey to be + </p> + <p> + Of birds of air, or fishes of the sea; + </p> + <p> + My reason tells me ev'ry grave's the same, + </p> + <p> + Return we must, at last, from whence we came, + </p> + <p> + Here ling'ring death alone we can expect; + </p> + <p> + To brave the waves 'tis better to elect; + </p> + <p> + I yet have strength, and 'tis not far to land; + </p> + <p> + The wind sets fair: let's try to gain the strand; + </p> + <p> + From rock to rock we'll go: I many view, + </p> + <p> + Where I can rest; to THIS we'll bid adieu. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TO move, Alaciel readily agreed; + </p> + <p> + Again our couple ventured to proceed; + </p> + <p> + The casket safe in tow; the weather hot; + </p> + <p> + From rock to rock with care our swimmer got; + </p> + <p> + The princess, anxious on his back to keep:— + </p> + <p> + New mode of traversing the wat'ry deep. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WITH Heav'n's assistance, and the rocks for rest, + </p> + <p> + The youth, by hunger and fatigue oppressed, + </p> + <p> + Uneasiness of mind, weighed down with care, + </p> + <p> + Not for himself, but safety of the fair, + </p> + <p> + A fast of two long tedious days now o'er, + </p> + <p> + The casket and the belle he brought on shore: <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + I THINK you cry—how wond'rously exact, + </p> + <p> + To bring the casket into ev'ry act! + </p> + <p> + Is that a circumstance of weight I pray? + </p> + <p> + It truly seems so, and without delay, + </p> + <p> + You'll see if I be wrong; no airy flight, + </p> + <p> + Or jeer, or raillery, have I in sight. + </p> + <p> + Had I embarked our couple in a ship + </p> + <p> + Without or cash or jewels for the trip, + </p> + <p> + Distress had followed, you must be aware; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis past our pow'r to live on love or air; + </p> + <p> + In vain AFFECTION ev'ry effort tries + </p> + <p> + Inexorable hunger ALL defies. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE casket, with the diamonds proved a source, + </p> + <p> + To which 'twas requisite to have recourse; + </p> + <p> + Some Hispal sold, and others put in pawn, + </p> + <p> + And purchased, near the coast, a house and lawn; + </p> + <p> + With woods, extensive park, and pleasure ground; + </p> + <p> + And many bow'rs and shady walks around, + </p> + <p> + Where charming hours they passed, and this 'twas plain, + </p> + <p> + Without the casket they could n'er obtain. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BENEATH the wood there was a secret grot, + </p> + <p> + Where lovers, when they pleased, concealment got, + </p> + <p> + A quiet, gloomy, solitary place, + </p> + <p> + Designed by nature for the billing race. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ONE day, as through the grove a walk they sought, + </p> + <p> + The god of love our couple thither brought; + </p> + <p> + His wishes, Hispal, as they went along, + </p> + <p> + Explained im part by words direct and strong; + </p> + <p> + The rest his sighs expressed, (they spoke the soul;)— + </p> + <p> + The princess, trembling, listened to the whole. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0168m.jpg" alt="0168m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0168.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + SAID he, we now are in a place retired, + </p> + <p> + Unknown to man, (such spots how oft desired!) + </p> + <p> + Let's take advantage of the present hour: + </p> + <p> + No joys, but those of LOVE, are in our pow'r; + </p> + <p> + All others see withdrawn! and no one knows + </p> + <p> + We even live; perhaps both friends and foes + </p> + <p> + Believe us in the belly of a whale; + </p> + <p> + Allow me, lovely princess, to prevail; + </p> + <p> + Bestow your kindness, or, without delay, + </p> + <p> + Those charms to Mamolin let me convey. + </p> + <p> + Yet, why go thither?—happy you could make + </p> + <p> + The man, whose constancy no perils shake, + </p> + <p> + What would you more?—his passion's ardent grown; + </p> + <p> + And surely you've enough resistance shown. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SUCH tender elocution Hispal used, + </p> + <p> + That e'en to marble, 'Twould have warmth infused; + </p> + <p> + While fair Alaciel, on the bark of trees, + </p> + <p> + With bodkin wrote, apparently at ease. + </p> + <p> + But Cupid drew her thoughts to higher things, + </p> + <p> + Than merely graving what from fancy springs. + </p> + <p> + Her lover and the place, at once assured, + </p> + <p> + That such a secret would be well secured; + </p> + <p> + A tempting bait, which made her, with regret, + </p> + <p> + Resist the witching charm that her beset. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + UNLUCKILY, 'twas then the month of May, + </p> + <p> + When youthful hearts are often led astray, + </p> + <p> + And soft desire can scarcely be concealed, + </p> + <p> + But presses through the pores to be revealed. + </p> + <p> + How many do we see, by slow degrees, + </p> + <p> + And, step by step, accord their ALL to please, + </p> + <p> + Who, at the onset, never dreamed to grant + </p> + <p> + The smallest favour to their fond gallant. + </p> + <p> + The god of love so archly acts his part, + </p> + <p> + And, in unguarded moments, melts the heart, + </p> + <p> + That many belles have tumbled in the snare, + </p> + <p> + Who, how it happened, scarcely could declare. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN they had reached the pleasing secret spot; + </p> + <p> + Young Hispal wished to go within the grot; + </p> + <p> + Though nearly overcome, she this declined; + </p> + <p> + But then his services arose to mind; + </p> + <p> + Her life from Ocean's waves, her honour too, + </p> + <p> + To him she owed; what could he have in view? + </p> + <p> + A something, which already has been shown, + </p> + <p> + Was saved through Hispal's nervous arm alone: + </p> + <p> + Said he, far better bless a real friend, + </p> + <p> + Than have each treasure rifled in the end, + </p> + <p> + By some successful ruffian; think it o'er; + </p> + <p> + You little dream for whom you guard the store. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE princess felt the truth of this remark, + </p> + <p> + And half surrendered to the loving spark; + </p> + <p> + A show'r obliged the pair, without delay, + </p> + <p> + To seek a shed:—the place I need not say; + </p> + <p> + The rest within the grotto lies concealed:— + </p> + <p> + The scenes of Cupid ne'er should be revealed. + </p> + <p> + Alaciel blame, or not—I've many known, + </p> + <p> + With less excuses, who've like favours shown. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ALONE the cavern witnessed not their bliss; + </p> + <p> + In love, a point once gained, naught feels amiss, + </p> + <p> + If trees could speak that grew within the dell, + </p> + <p> + What joys they viewed—what stories they might tell! + </p> + <p> + The park, the lawn, the pleasure grounds, and bow'rs, + </p> + <p> + The belts of roses, and the beds of flow'rs, + </p> + <p> + All, all could whisper something of the kind; + </p> + <p> + At length, both longed their friends again to find, + </p> + <p> + Quite cloyed with love, they sighed to be at court; + </p> + <p> + Thus spoke the fair her wishes to support. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + LOVED youth, to ME you must be ever dear; + </p> + <p> + To doubt it would ungen'rous now appear; + </p> + <p> + But tell me, pray, what's love without desire, + </p> + <p> + Devoid of fear, and nothing to acquire? + </p> + <p> + Flame unconfined is soon exhausted found, + </p> + <p> + But, thwarted in its course 'twill long abound; + </p> + <p> + I fear this spot, which we so highly prize, + </p> + <p> + Will soon appear a desert in our eyes, + </p> + <p> + And prove at last our grave; relieve my woe; + </p> + <p> + At once to Alexandria, Hispal go; + </p> + <p> + Alive pronounced, you presently will see, + </p> + <p> + What worthy people think of you and me; + </p> + <p> + Conceal our residence, declare you came, + </p> + <p> + My journey to prepare, (your certain aim,) + </p> + <p> + And see that I've a num'rous escort sent, + </p> + <p> + To guard me from a similar event. + </p> + <p> + By it, believe me, you shall nothing lose; + </p> + <p> + And this is what I willingly would choose; + </p> + <p> + For, be I single, or in Hymen's band, + </p> + <p> + I'd have you follow me by sea and land, + </p> + <p> + And be assured, should favour I withdraw, + </p> + <p> + That I've observed in you some glaring flaw. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WERE her intentions fully as expressed, + </p> + <p> + Or contrary to what her lips confessed, + </p> + <p> + No matter which her view, 'twas very plain, + </p> + <p> + If she would Hispal's services retain, + </p> + <p> + 'Twere right the youth with promises to feed, + </p> + <p> + While his assistance she so much must need: + </p> + <p> + As soon as he was ready to depart + </p> + <p> + She pressed him fondly to her glowing heart, + </p> + <p> + And charged him with a letter to the king; + </p> + <p> + This Hispal hastened to the prince to bring; + </p> + <p> + Each sail he crowded:—plied with ev'ry oar; + </p> + <p> + A wind quite fair soon brought him to shore; + </p> + <p> + To court he went, where all with eager eyes, + </p> + <p> + Demanded if he lived, amid surprise, + </p> + <p> + And where he left the princess; what her state? + </p> + <p> + These questions answered, Hispal, quite elate, + </p> + <p> + Procured the escort, which, without delay, + </p> + <p> + Though leaving him behind, was sent away: + </p> + <p> + No dark mistrust retained the noble youth; + </p> + <p> + But Zarus wished it: such appeared the truth. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BY one of early years the troop was led, + </p> + <p> + A handsome lad, and elegantly bred. + </p> + <p> + He landed with his party near the park. + </p> + <p> + And these in two divided ere 'twas dark. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ONE half he left a guard upon the shore, + </p> + <p> + And with the other hastened to the door, + </p> + <p> + Where dwelled the belle, who daily fairer grew: + </p> + <p> + Our chief was smitten instantly at view; + </p> + <p> + And, fearing opportunity again, + </p> + <p> + Like this, perhaps, he never might obtain, + </p> + <p> + Avowed at once his passion to the fair; + </p> + <p> + At which she frowned, and told him, with an air; + </p> + <p> + To recollect his duty, and her rank:— + </p> + <p> + With equals only, he should be so frank. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ON these occasions, prudent 'tis to show + </p> + <p> + Your disappointment by a face of woe; + </p> + <p> + Seem ev'ry way the picture of despair:— + </p> + <p> + This countenance our knight appeared to wear; + </p> + <p> + To starve himself he vowed was his design; + </p> + <p> + To use the poniard he should ne'er incline, + </p> + <p> + For then no time for penitence would rest.— + </p> + <p> + The princess of his folly made a jest. + </p> + <p> + He fasted one whole day; she-tried in vain + </p> + <p> + To make him from the enterprise refrain. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT length, the second day she 'gan to feel, + </p> + <p> + And strong emotion scarcely could conceal. + </p> + <p> + What! let a person die her charms could save! + </p> + <p> + 'Twas cruel, thus to treat a youth so brave. + </p> + <p> + Through pity, she at last, to please the chief, + </p> + <p> + Consented to bestow on him relief; + </p> + <p> + For, favours, when conferred with sullen air, + </p> + <p> + But little gratify she was aware. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHen satisfied the smart gallant appeared, + </p> + <p> + And anxiously to putting off adhered, + </p> + <p> + Pretending that the wind and tide would fail; + </p> + <p> + The galleys sometimes were unfit to sail, + </p> + <p> + Repairs required; then further heard the news, + </p> + <p> + That certain pirates had unpleasant views; + </p> + <p> + To fall upon the escort they'd contrived: + </p> + <p> + At length, a pirate suddenly arrived, + </p> + <p> + Surprized the party left upon the shore, + </p> + <p> + Destroyed the whole; then sought the house for more, + </p> + <p> + And scaled the walls while darkness spread around. + </p> + <p> + The pirate was Grifonio's second found, + </p> + <p> + Who, in a trice, the noble mansion took, + </p> + <p> + And joy gave place to grief in ev'ry look. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THe Alexandrian swore and cursed his lot; + </p> + <p> + The pirate soon the lady's story got, + </p> + <p> + And, taking her aside, his share required + </p> + <p> + Such impudence Alaciel's patience tired, + </p> + <p> + Who, ev'ry thing refused with haughty air; + </p> + <p> + Of this, howe'er, the robber was aware; + </p> + <p> + In Venus' court no novice was he thought; + </p> + <p> + To gain the princess anxiously he sought; + </p> + <p> + Said he, you'd better take me as a friend; + </p> + <p> + I'm more than pirate, and you'll comprehend, + </p> + <p> + As you've obliged one dying swain to fast, + </p> + <p> + You fast in turn, or you'll give way at last; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis justice this demands: we sons of sea + </p> + <p> + Know how to deal with those of each degree; + </p> + <p> + Remember you will nothing have to eat, + </p> + <p> + Till your surrender fully is complete. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NO haggling, princess pray, my word receive; + </p> + <p> + What could be done, her terror to relieve? + </p> + <p> + Above all law is might:—'twill take its course; + </p> + <p> + Entire submission is the last resource. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OF'T what we would not, we're obliged to do, + </p> + <p> + When fate our steps with rigour will pursue. + </p> + <p> + No folly greater than to heighten pain, + </p> + <p> + When we are sensible relief is vain. + </p> + <p> + What she, through pity, to another gave, + </p> + <p> + Might well be granted when herself 'twould save. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT length she yielded to this suitor rude:— + </p> + <p> + No grief so great, but what may be subdued. + </p> + <p> + 'Twould in the pirate doubtless have been wise, + </p> + <p> + The belle to move, and thus prevent surprise; + </p> + <p> + But who, from folly in amours is free? + </p> + <p> + The god of love and wisdom ne'er agree. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHILE our gay pirate thought himself at ease, + </p> + <p> + The wind quite fair to sail when he might please, + </p> + <p> + Dame Fortune, sleepy only while we wake, + </p> + <p> + And slily watching when repose we take, + </p> + <p> + Contrived a trick the cunning knave to play, + </p> + <p> + And this was put in force ere break of day. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A LORD, the owner of a neighb'ring seat, + </p> + <p> + Unmarried;—fond of what was nice and neat, + </p> + <p> + Without attachment, and devoid of care, + </p> + <p> + Save something new to meet among the FAIR; + </p> + <p> + Grew tired of those he long around had viewed, + </p> + <p> + Now constantly, in thought, our belle pursued. + </p> + <p> + He'd money, friends, and credit all his days, + </p> + <p> + And could two thousand men at pleasure raise: + </p> + <p> + One charming morn, together these he brought; + </p> + <p> + Said he, brave fellows, can it well be thought, + </p> + <p> + That we allow a pirate, (dire disgrace!) + </p> + <p> + To plunder as he likes before our face, + </p> + <p> + And make a slave of one whose form 's divine? + </p> + <p> + Let's to the castle, such is my design, + </p> + <p> + And from the ruffian liberate the fair; + </p> + <p> + This evening ev'ry one will here repair, + </p> + <p> + Well armed, and then in silence we'll proceed, + </p> + <p> + (By night 'tis nothing will impede,) + </p> + <p> + And ere Aurora peeps, perform the task; + </p> + <p> + The only booty that I mean to ask + </p> + <p> + Is this fair dame; but not a slave to make, + </p> + <p> + I anxiously desire to let her take + </p> + <p> + Whate'er is her's:—restore her honour too; + </p> + <p> + All other things I freely leave to you; + </p> + <p> + Men, horses, baggage, in a word, the whole + </p> + <p> + Of what the knavish rascals now control. + </p> + <p> + Another thing, howe'er:—I wish to hang + </p> + <p> + The pirate instantly, before his gang. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS speech so well succeeded to inspire, + </p> + <p> + That scarcely could the men retain their ire. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE evening came, the party soon arrived; + </p> + <p> + They ate not much, but drink their rage revived. + </p> + <p> + By such expensive treats we've armies known, + </p> + <p> + In Germany and Flanders overthrown; + </p> + <p> + And our commander was of this aware + </p> + <p> + 'Twas prudent, surely, no expense to spare. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THEY carried ladders for the escalade, + </p> + <p> + And each was furnished with a tempered blade; + </p> + <p> + No other thing embarrassing they'd got; + </p> + <p> + No drums; but all was silent as the grot. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THEY reached the house when nearly break of day, + </p> + <p> + The time old Morpheus' slumbers often weigh; + </p> + <p> + The gang, with few exceptions, (then asleep), + </p> + <p> + Were sent, their vigils with grim death to keep. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE chief hung up:—the princess soon appeared; + </p> + <p> + Her spirits presently our champion cheered; + </p> + <p> + The pirate scarcely had her bosom moved:— + </p> + <p> + No tears at least a marked affection proved; + </p> + <p> + But, by her prayers she pardon sought to gain, + </p> + <p> + For some who were not in the conflict slain; + </p> + <p> + Consoled the dying, and lamented those, + </p> + <p> + Who, by the sword, had closed their book of woes: + </p> + <p> + Then left the place without the least regret, + </p> + <p> + Where such adventures and alarms she'd met. + </p> + <p> + 'Tis said, indeed, she presently forgot + </p> + <p> + The two gallants who last became her lot; + </p> + <p> + And I can easily the fact believe: + </p> + <p> + Removed from sight, but few for lovers grieve. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SHE, by her neighbour, was received, we're told, + </p> + <p> + 'Mid costly furniture and burnished gold; + </p> + <p> + We may suppose what splendour shone around, + </p> + <p> + When all-attracting he would fain be found; + </p> + <p> + The best of wines; each dish considered rare:— + </p> + <p> + The gods themselves received not better fare: + </p> + <p> + Till then, Alaciel ne'er had tasted wine; + </p> + <p> + Her faith forbade a liquor so divine; + </p> + <p> + And, unacquainted with the potent juice, + </p> + <p> + She much indulged at table in its use. + </p> + <p> + If lately LOVE disquieted her brain, + </p> + <p> + New poison now pervaded ev'ry vein; + </p> + <p> + Both fraught with danger to the beauteous FAIR, + </p> + <p> + Whose charms should guarded be with ev'ry care. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE princess by the maids in bed was placed; + </p> + <p> + Then thither went the host with anxious haste, + </p> + <p> + What sought he? you will ask:—mere torpid charms:— + </p> + <p> + I wish the like were clasped within my arms. + </p> + <p> + Give me as much, said one the other week, + </p> + <p> + And see if I'd a neighbour's kindness seek. + </p> + <p> + Through Morpheus' sleepy pow'r, and Bacchus' wine: + </p> + <p> + Our host, at length, completed his design. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ALACIEL, when at morn, she oped her eyes, + </p> + <p> + Was quite o'ercome with terror and surprise, + </p> + <p> + No tears would flow, and fear restrained her voice; + </p> + <p> + Unable to resist, she'd got no choice. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A NIGHT thus passed, the wily lover said, + </p> + <p> + Must surely give a license to your bed. + </p> + <p> + The princess thought the same; but our gallant, + </p> + <p> + Soon cloyed, for other conquests 'gan to pant. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0180m.jpg" alt="0180m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0180.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + THE host one evening from the mansion went; + </p> + <p> + A friend he left himself to represent, + </p> + <p> + And with the charming fair supply his place, + </p> + <p> + Which, in the dark he thought, with easy grace, + </p> + <p> + Might be effected, if he held his tongue, + </p> + <p> + And properly behaved the whole night long. + </p> + <p> + To this the other willingly agreed; + </p> + <p> + (What friend would be refused, if thus in need?) + </p> + <p> + And this new-comer had complete success + </p> + <p> + He scarcely could his ecstacy express. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE dame exclaimed:—pray how could he pretend; + </p> + <p> + To treat me so, and leave me to a friend? + </p> + <p> + The other thought the host was much to blame; + </p> + <p> + But since 'tis o'er, said he, be now your aim, + </p> + <p> + To punish his contempt of beauteous charms; + </p> + <p> + With favours load me—take me to your arms; + </p> + <p> + Caress with fond embrace; bestow delight; + </p> + <p> + And seem to love me, though in mere despite. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SHE followed his advice: avenged the wrong; + </p> + <p> + And naught omitted, pleasures to prolong. + </p> + <p> + If he obtained his wishes from the fair, + </p> + <p> + The host about it scarcely seemed to care. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE sixth adventure of our charming belle, + </p> + <p> + Some writers one way, some another tell; + </p> + <p> + Whence many think that favour I have shown, + </p> + <p> + And for her, one gallant the less would own. + </p> + <p> + Mere scandal this; from truth I would nor swerve, + </p> + <p> + To please the fair: more credence I deserve; + </p> + <p> + Her husband only eight precursors had; + </p> + <p> + The fact was such;—I none suppress nor add. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE host returned and found his friend content; + </p> + <p> + To pardon him Alaciel gave consent; + </p> + <p> + And 'tween them things would equally divide + </p> + <p> + Of royal bosoms clemency's the pride. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHILE thus the princess passed from hand to hand + </p> + <p> + She oft amused her fancy 'mong a band + </p> + <p> + Of charming belles that on her would attend, + </p> + <p> + And one of these she made an humble friend. + </p> + <p> + The fav'rite in the house a lover had, + </p> + <p> + A smart, engaging, handsome, clever lad, + </p> + <p> + Well born, but much to violence inclined + </p> + <p> + A wooer that could scarcely be confined + </p> + <p> + To gentle means, but oft his suit began, + </p> + <p> + Where others end, who follow Cupid's plan. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IT one day happened, that this forward spark; + </p> + <p> + The girl we speak of, met within the park, + </p> + <p> + And to a summer-house the fav'rite drew; + </p> + <p> + The course they took the princess chanced to view + </p> + <p> + As wand'ring near; but neither swain nor fair, + </p> + <p> + Suspicion had, that any one was there; + </p> + <p> + And this gallant most confidently thought, + </p> + <p> + The girl by force, might to his terms be brought! + </p> + <p> + His wretched temper, obstacle to love, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry bliss bestowed by heav'n above, + </p> + <p> + Had oft his hopes of favours lately marred; + </p> + <p> + And fear, with those designs, had also jarred: + </p> + <p> + The girl, howe'er, would likely have been kind, + </p> + <p> + If opportunities had pleased her mind. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE lover, now convinced that he was feared; + </p> + <p> + In dark designs upon her persevered. + </p> + <p> + No sooner had she entered, than our man + </p> + <p> + Locked instantly the door, but vain his plan; + </p> + <p> + To open it the princess had a key; + </p> + <p> + The girl her fault perceived, and tried to flee; + </p> + <p> + He held her fast; the charmer loudly called; + </p> + <p> + The princess came—or vainly she had squalled. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + QUITE disappointed: overcome with ire, + </p> + <p> + He wholly lost respect amid desire, + </p> + <p> + And swore by all the gods, that, ere they went, + </p> + <p> + The one or other should to him consent; + </p> + <p> + Their hands he'd firmly tie to have his way; + </p> + <p> + For help (the place so far) 'twere vain to pray; + </p> + <p> + To take a lot was all that he'd allow; + </p> + <p> + Come, draw, he said; to Fortune you must bow; + </p> + <p> + No haggling I request—comply; be still: + </p> + <p> + Resolved I am with one to have my will. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHAT has the princess done? the girl replied, + </p> + <p> + That you, to make her suffer, thus decide + </p> + <p> + Yes, said the spark, if on her fall the lot, + </p> + <p> + Then you'll, at least for present, be forgot. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NO, cried Alaciel, ne'er I'll have it said, + </p> + <p> + To sacrifice I saw a maiden led; + </p> + <p> + I'll suffer rather all that you expect, + </p> + <p> + If you will spare my friend as I direct. + </p> + <p> + 'Twas all in vain, the lots were drawn at last, + </p> + <p> + And on the princess was the burthen cast; + </p> + <p> + The other was permitted to retire, + </p> + <p> + And each was sworn that nothing should transpire: + </p> + <p> + But our gallant would sooner have been hung, + </p> + <p> + Than have upon such secrets held his tongue; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis clear, no longer silent he remained, + </p> + <p> + Than one to listen to his tale he'd gained. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS change of favourites the princess grieved; + </p> + <p> + That Cupid trifled with her she perceived; + </p> + <p> + With much regret she saw her blooming charms, + </p> + <p> + The Helen of too many Paris' arms. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ONE day it happened, as our beauteous belle + </p> + <p> + Was sleeping in a wood beside a dell, + </p> + <p> + By chance there passed, quite near, a wand'ring knight, + </p> + <p> + Like those the ladies followed with delight, + </p> + <p> + When they on palfreys rode in days of old, + </p> + <p> + And purity were always thought to hold. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS knight, who copied those of famed romance, + </p> + <p> + Sir Roger, and the rest, in complisance, + </p> + <p> + No sooner saw the princess thus asleep, + </p> + <p> + Than instantly he wished a kiss to reap. + </p> + <p> + While thinking, whether from the neck or lip, + </p> + <p> + 'Twere best the tempting balm of bliss to sip, + </p> + <p> + He suddenly began to recollect + </p> + <p> + The laws of chivalry he should respect. + </p> + <p> + Although the thought retained, his fervent prayer + </p> + <p> + To Cupid was, that while the nymph was there, + </p> + <p> + Her fascinating charms he might enjoy; + </p> + <p> + Sure love's soft senses were ne'er designed to cloy! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE princess woke, and great surprise expressed; + </p> + <p> + Oh! charming fair, said he, be not distressed; + </p> + <p> + No savage of the woods nor giant 's nigh, + </p> + <p> + A wand'ring knight alone you now descry, + </p> + <p> + Delighted thus to meet a beauteous belle + </p> + <p> + Such charms divine, what angel can excel! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS compliment was followed by his sighs, + </p> + <p> + And frank confession, both from tongue and eyes; + </p> + <p> + Our lover far in little time could go; + </p> + <p> + At length, he offered on her to bestow, + </p> + <p> + His hand and heart, and ev'ry thing beside, + </p> + <p> + Which custom sanctions when we seek a bride. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WITH courtesy his offer was received, + </p> + <p> + And she related what her bosom grieved; + </p> + <p> + Detailed her hist'ry, but with care concealed + </p> + <p> + The six gallants, as wrong to be revealed. + </p> + <p> + The knight, in what he wished, indulgence got; + </p> + <p> + And, while the princess much deplored her lot, + </p> + <p> + The youth proposed Alaciel he should bring, + </p> + <p> + To Mamolin, or Alexandria's king. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TO Mamolin? replied the princess fair, + </p> + <p> + No, no—I now indeed would fain repair, + </p> + <p> + (Could I my wishes have), to Zarus' court, + </p> + <p> + My native country:—thither give support. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IF Cupid grant me life, rejoined the knight, + </p> + <p> + You there shall go, and I'll assist your flight; + </p> + <p> + To have redress, upon yourself depends, + </p> + <p> + As well as to requite the best of friends; + </p> + <p> + But should I perish in the bold design, + </p> + <p> + Submit you must, as wills the pow'rs divine. + </p> + <p> + I'll freely say, howe'er, that I regard, + </p> + <p> + My services enough to claim reward. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ALACIEL readily to this agreed; + </p> + <p> + And favours fondly promised to concede; + </p> + <p> + T'ensure, indeed, his guarding her throughout, + </p> + <p> + They were to be conferred upon the route, + </p> + <p> + From time to time as onward they should go, + </p> + <p> + Not all at once, but daily some to flow. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THINGS thus arranged, the fair behind the knight + </p> + <p> + Got up at once, and with him took to flight. + </p> + <p> + Our cavalier his servants sought to find, + </p> + <p> + That, when he crossed the wood, he left behind; + </p> + <p> + With these a nephew and his tutor rode; + </p> + <p> + The belle a palfrey took, as more the mode, + </p> + <p> + But, by her walked attentively the spark, + </p> + <p> + A tale he'd now relate; at times remark + </p> + <p> + The passing scene; then press his ardent flame; + </p> + <p> + And thus amused our royal, beauteous dame. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE treaty was most faithfully observed; + </p> + <p> + No calculation wrong; from naught they swerved. + </p> + <p> + At length they reached the sea; on ship-board got; + </p> + <p> + A quick and pleasing passage was their lot; + </p> + <p> + Delightfully serene, which joy increased; + </p> + <p> + To land they came (from perils thought released;) + </p> + <p> + At Joppa they debarked; two days remained: + </p> + <p> + And when refreshed, the proper road they gained; + </p> + <p> + Their escort was the lover's train alone; + </p> + <p> + On Asia's shores to plunder bands are prone; + </p> + <p> + By these were met our spark and lovely fair; + </p> + <p> + New dangers they, alas! were forced to share. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TO cede, at first, their numbers forced the train; + </p> + <p> + But rallied by our knight they were again; + </p> + <p> + A desp'rate push he made; repulsed their force; + </p> + <p> + And by his valour stopt, at length, their course; + </p> + <p> + In which attack a mortal wound he got, + </p> + <p> + But was not left for dead upon the spot. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BEFORE his death he full instructions gave, + </p> + <p> + To grant the belle whatever she might crave; + </p> + <p> + He ordered too, his nephew should convey, + </p> + <p> + Alaciel to her home without delay, + </p> + <p> + Bequeathing him whatever he possessed, + </p> + <p> + And—what the princess owed among the rest. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT length, from dread alarms and tears released, + </p> + <p> + The pair fulfilled the will of our deceased; + </p> + <p> + Discharged each favour was, of which the last + </p> + <p> + Was cancelled just as they the frontiers passed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE nephew here his precious charge resigned, + </p> + <p> + For fear the king should be displeased to find, + </p> + <p> + His daughter guarded by a youthful swain:— + </p> + <p> + The tutor only with her could remain. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NO words of mine, no language can express + </p> + <p> + The monarch's joy his child to re-possess; + </p> + <p> + And, since the difficulty I perceive, + </p> + <p> + I'll imitate old Sol's retreat at eve, + </p> + <p> + Who falls with such rapidity of view, + </p> + <p> + He seems to plunge, dame Thetis to pursue. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE tutor liked his own details to hear, + </p> + <p> + And entertaining made his tales appear: + </p> + <p> + The num'rous perils that the fair had fled, + </p> + <p> + Who laughed aside, no doubt, at what he said. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + I SHOULD observe, the aged tutor cried, + </p> + <p> + The princess, while for liberty she sighed, + </p> + <p> + And quite alone remained (by Hispal left,) + </p> + <p> + That she might be of idleness bereft, + </p> + <p> + Resolved most fervently a god to serve, + </p> + <p> + From whom she scarcely since would ever swerve, + </p> + <p> + A god much worshipped 'mong the people there, + </p> + <p> + With num'rous temples which his honours share, + </p> + <p> + Denominated cabinets and bow'rs, + </p> + <p> + In which, from high respect to heav'nly pow'rs, + </p> + <p> + They represent the image of a bird, + </p> + <p> + A pleasing sight, though (what appears absurd) + </p> + <p> + 'Tis bare of plumage, save about the wings; + </p> + <p> + To this each youthful bosom incense brings, + </p> + <p> + While other gods, as I've been often told, + </p> + <p> + They scarcely notice, till they're growing old. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + DID you but know the virtuous steps she trod, + </p> + <p> + While thus devoted to the little god, + </p> + <p> + You'd thank a hundred times the pow'rs above, + </p> + <p> + That gave you such a child to bless your love. + </p> + <p> + But many other customs there abound:— + </p> + <p> + The FAIR with perfect liberty are found: + </p> + <p> + Can go and come, whene'er the humour fits; + </p> + <p> + No eunuch (shadow like) that never quits; + </p> + <p> + But watches ev'ry movement:—always feared; + </p> + <p> + No men, but who've upon the chin a beard: + </p> + <p> + Your daughter from the first, their manners took: + </p> + <p> + So easy is her ev'ry act and look, + </p> + <p> + And truly to her honour I may say, + </p> + <p> + She's all-accommodating ev'ry way. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE king delighted seemed at what he heard; + </p> + <p> + But since her journey could not be deferred, + </p> + <p> + The princess, with a num'rous escort, tried + </p> + <p> + Again o'er seas t'wards Garba's shores to glide, + </p> + <p> + And, there arrived, was cordially received + </p> + <p> + By Mamolin, who loved, she soon believed, + </p> + <p> + To fond excess; and, all her suite to aid, + </p> + <p> + A handsome gift to ev'ry one was made. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE king with noble feasts the court regaled, + </p> + <p> + At which Alaciel pleasantly detailed + </p> + <p> + just what she liked, or true or false, 'twas clear; + </p> + <p> + The prince and courtiers were disposed to hear. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT night the queen retired to soft repose, + </p> + <p> + From whence next morn with honour she arose; + </p> + <p> + The king was found much pleasure to express; + </p> + <p> + Alaciel asked no more, you well may guess. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BY this we learn, that husbands who aver + </p> + <p> + Their wond'rous penetration often err; + </p> + <p> + And while they fancy things so very plain, + </p> + <p> + They've been preceded by a fav'rite swain. + </p> + <p> + The safest rule 's to be upon your guard; + </p> + <p> + Fear ev'ry guile; yet hope the full reward. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SWEET, charming FAIR, your characters revere; + </p> + <p> + The Mamolin's a bird not common here. + </p> + <p> + With us Love's fascination is so soon + </p> + <p> + Succeeded by the licensed honey moon, + </p> + <p> + There's scarcely opportunity to fool, + </p> + <p> + Though oft the husband proves an easy tool. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + YOUR friendships may be very chaste and pure, + </p> + <p> + But strangely Cupid's lessons will allure. + </p> + <p> + Defeat his wiles; resist his tempting charms + </p> + <p> + E'en from suspicion suffer not alarms. + </p> + <p> + Don't laugh at my advice; 'twere like the boys, + </p> + <p> + Who better might amuse themselves with toys. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IF any one, howe'er unable seem, + </p> + <p> + To make resistance 'gainst the flame supreme + </p> + <p> + Turn ALL to jest; though right to keep the crown + </p> + <p> + Yet lost, 'there wrong, yourself to hang or drown. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Magick_Cup" id="Magick_Cup">THE MAGICK CUP</a> + </h2> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0192m.jpg" alt="0192m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0192.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE worst of ills, with jealousy compared, + </p> + <p> + Are trifling torments ev'ry where declared. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IMAGINE, to yourself a silly fool, + </p> + <p> + To dark suspicion grown an easy tool; + </p> + <p> + No soft repose he finds, by night or day; + </p> + <p> + But rings his ear, he's wretched ev'ry way! + </p> + <p> + Continually he dreams his forehead sprouts; + </p> + <p> + The truth of reveries he never doubts. + </p> + <p> + But this I would not fully guaranty, + </p> + <p> + For he who dreams, 'tis said, asleep should be; + </p> + <p> + And those who've caught, from time to time, a peep, + </p> + <p> + Pretend to say—the jealous never sleep. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A MAN who has suspicions soon will rouse; + </p> + <p> + But buz a fly around his precious spouse, + </p> + <p> + At once he fancies cuckoldom is brought, + </p> + <p> + And nothing can eradicate the thought; + </p> + <p> + In spite of reason he must have a place, + </p> + <p> + And numbered be, among the horned race; + </p> + <p> + A cuckold to himself he freely owns, + </p> + <p> + Though otherwise perhaps in flesh and bones. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + GOOD folks, of cuckoldom, pray what's the harm, + </p> + <p> + To give, from time to time, such dire alarm? + </p> + <p> + What injury 's received, and what 's the wrong, + </p> + <p> + At which so many sneer and loll their tongue? + </p> + <p> + While unacquainted with the fact, 'tis naught; + </p> + <p> + If known:—e'en then 'tis scarcely worth a thought. + </p> + <p> + You think, however, 'tis a serious grief; + </p> + <p> + Then try to doubt it, which may bring relief, + </p> + <p> + And don't resemble him who took a sup, + </p> + <p> + From out the celebrated magick cup. + </p> + <p> + Be warned by others' ills; the tale I'll tell; + </p> + <p> + Perhaps your irksomeness it may dispel. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BUT first, by reason let me prove, I pray, + </p> + <p> + That evil such as this, and which you say, + </p> + <p> + Oft weighs you down with soul-corroding care; + </p> + <p> + Is only in the mind:—mere spright of air: + </p> + <p> + Your hat upon your head for instance place, + </p> + <p> + Less gently rather than's your usual case; + </p> + <p> + Pray, don't it presently at ease remain? + </p> + <p> + And from it do you aught amiss retain? + </p> + <p> + Not e'en a spot; there's nothing half so clear; + </p> + <p> + The features, too, they as before appear? + </p> + <p> + No difference assuredly you see? + </p> + <p> + Then how can cuckoldom an evil be? + </p> + <p> + Such my conclusion, spite of fools or brutes, + </p> + <p> + With whose ideas reason never suits. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + YES, yes, but honour has, you know, a claim: + </p> + <p> + Who e'er denied it?—never 'twas my aim. + </p> + <p> + But what of honour?—nothing else is heard; + </p> + <p> + At Rome a different conduct is preferred; + </p> + <p> + The cuckold there, who takes the thing to heart, + </p> + <p> + Is thought a fool, and acts a blockhead's part; + </p> + <p> + While he, who laughs, is always well received + </p> + <p> + And honest fellow through the town believed. + </p> + <p> + Were this misfortune viewed with proper eyes, + </p> + <p> + Such ills from cuckoldom would ne'er arise. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THAT advantageous 'tis, we now will prove: + </p> + <p> + Folks laugh; your wife a pliant glove shall move; + </p> + <p> + But, if you've twenty favourites around, + </p> + <p> + A single syllable will ne'er resound. + </p> + <p> + Whene'er you speak, each word has double force; + </p> + <p> + At table, you've precedency of course, + </p> + <p> + And oft will get the very nicest parts; + </p> + <p> + Well pleased who serves you!—all the household smarts + </p> + <p> + No means neglect your favour to obtain; + </p> + <p> + You've full command; resistance would be vain. + </p> + <p> + Whence this conclusion must directly spring: + </p> + <p> + To be a cuckold is a useful thing. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT cards, should adverse fortune you pursue; + </p> + <p> + To take revenge is ever thought your due; + </p> + <p> + And your opponent often will revoke, + </p> + <p> + That you for better luck may have a cloak: + </p> + <p> + If you've a friend o'er head and ears in debt: + </p> + <p> + At once, to help him numbers you can get. + </p> + <p> + You fancy these your rind regales and cheers + </p> + <p> + She's better for it; more beautiful appears; + </p> + <p> + The Spartan king, in Helen found new charms, + </p> + <p> + When he'd recovered her from Paris' arms. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + YOUR wife the same; to make her, in your eye, + </p> + <p> + More beautiful 's the aim you may rely; + </p> + <p> + For, if unkind, she would a hag be thought, + </p> + <p> + Incapable soft love scenes to be taught. + </p> + <p> + These reasons make me to my thesis cling,— + </p> + <p> + To be a cuckold is a useful thing. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IF much too long this introduction seem, + </p> + <p> + The obvious cause is clearly in the theme, + </p> + <p> + And should not certainly be hurried o'er, + </p> + <p> + But now for something from th' historick store. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A CERTAIN man, no matter for his name, + </p> + <p> + His country, rank, nor residence nor fame, + </p> + <p> + Through fear of accidents had firmly sworn, + </p> + <p> + The marriage chain should ne'er by him be worn; + </p> + <p> + No tie but friendship, from the sex he'd crave: + </p> + <p> + If wrong or right, the question we will wave. + </p> + <p> + Be this as 't will, since Hymen could not find + </p> + <p> + Our wight to bear the wedded knot inclined, + </p> + <p> + The god of love, to manage for him tried, + </p> + <p> + And what he wished, from time to time supplied; + </p> + <p> + A lively fair he got, who charms displayed, + </p> + <p> + And made him father to a little maid; + </p> + <p> + Then died, and left the spark dissolved in tears: + </p> + <p> + Not such as flow for wives, (as oft appears) + </p> + <p> + When mourning 's nothing more than change of dress: + </p> + <p> + His anguish spoke the soul in great distress. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE daughter grew in years, improved in mien, + </p> + <p> + And soon the woman in her air was seen; + </p> + <p> + Time rolls apace, and once she's ridded of her bib, + </p> + <p> + Then alters daily, and her tongue gets glib, + </p> + <p> + Each year still taller, till she's found at length; + </p> + <p> + A perfect belle in look, in age, in strength. + </p> + <p> + His forward child, the father justly feared, + </p> + <p> + Would cheat the priest of fees so much revered; + </p> + <p> + The lawyer too, and god of marriage-joys; + </p> + <p> + Sad fault, that future prospects oft destroys: + </p> + <p> + To trust her virtue was not quite so sure; + </p> + <p> + He chose a convent, to be more secure, + </p> + <p> + Where this young charmer learned to pray and sew; + </p> + <p> + No wicked books, unfit for girls to know, + </p> + <p> + Corruption's page the senses to beguile + </p> + <p> + Dan Cupid never writes in convent style: <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OF nothing would she talk but holy-writ; + </p> + <p> + On which she could herself so well acquit, + </p> + <p> + That oft the gravest teachers were confused; + </p> + <p> + To praise her beauty, scarcely was excused; + </p> + <p> + No flatt'ry pleasure gave, and she'd reply: + </p> + <p> + Good sister stay!—consider, we must die; + </p> + <p> + Each feature perishes:—'tis naught but clay; + </p> + <p> + And soon will worms upon our bodies prey: + </p> + <p> + Superior needle-work our fair could do; + </p> + <p> + The spindle turn at ease:—embroider too; + </p> + <p> + Minerva's skill, or Clotho's, could impart; + </p> + <p> + In tapestry she'd gained Arachne's art; + </p> + <p> + And other talents, too, the daughter showed; + </p> + <p> + Her sense, wealth, beauty, soon were spread abroad: + </p> + <p> + But most her wealth a marked attention drew; + </p> + <p> + The belle had been immured with prudent view, + </p> + <p> + To keep her safely till a spouse was found, + </p> + <p> + Who with sufficient riches should abound. + </p> + <p> + From convents, heiresses are often led + </p> + <p> + Directly to the altar to be wed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SOME time the father had the girl declared + </p> + <p> + His lawful child, who all his fondness shared. + </p> + <p> + As soon as she was free from convent walls, + </p> + <p> + Her taste at once was changed from books to balls; + </p> + <p> + Around Calista (such was named our fair) + </p> + <p> + A host of lovers showed attentive care; + </p> + <p> + Cits, courtiers, officers, the beau, the sage, + </p> + <p> + Adventurers of ev'ry rank and age. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + FROM these Calista presently made choice, + </p> + <p> + Of one for whom her father gave his voice; + </p> + <p> + A handsome lad, and thought good humoured too + </p> + <p> + Few otherwise appear when first they woo. + </p> + <p> + Her fortune ample was; the dow'r the same; + </p> + <p> + The belle an only child; the like her flame. + </p> + <p> + But better still, our couple's chief delight, + </p> + <p> + Was mutual love and pleasure to excite. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TWO years in paradise thus passed the pair, + </p> + <p> + When bliss was changed to Hell's worst cank'ring care; + </p> + <p> + A fit of jealousy the husband grieved, + </p> + <p> + And, strange to tell, he all at once believed, + </p> + <p> + A lover with success his wife addressed, + </p> + <p> + When, but for him, the suit had ne'er been pressed; + </p> + <p> + For though the spark, the charming fair to gain, + </p> + <p> + Would ev'ry wily method try, 'twas plain, + </p> + <p> + Yet had the husband never terrors shown, + </p> + <p> + The lover, in despair, had quickly flown. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHAT should a husband do whose wife is sought, + </p> + <p> + With anxious fondness by another? Naught. + </p> + <p> + 'Tis this that leads me ever to advise, + </p> + <p> + To sleep at ease whichever side he lies. + </p> + <p> + In case she lends the spark a willing ear, + </p> + <p> + 'Twill not be better if you interfere: + </p> + <p> + She'll seek more opportunities you'll find; + </p> + <p> + But if to pay attention she's inclined, + </p> + <p> + You'll raise the inclination in her brain, + </p> + <p> + And then the danger will begin again. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHERE'ER suspicion dwells you may be sure, + </p> + <p> + To cuckoldom 'twill prove a place secure. + </p> + <p> + But Damon (such the husband's name), 'tis clear, + </p> + <p> + Thought otherwise, as we shall make appear. + </p> + <p> + He merits pity, and should be excused, + </p> + <p> + Since he, by bad advice, was much abused; + </p> + <p> + When had he trusted to himself to guide, + </p> + <p> + He'd acted wisely,'—hear and you'll decide. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE Enchantress Neria flourished in those days; + </p> + <p> + E'en Circe, she excelled in Satan's ways; + </p> + <p> + The storms she made obedient to her will, + </p> + <p> + And regulated with superior skill; + </p> + <p> + In chains the destinies she kept around; + </p> + <p> + The gentle zephyrs were her sages found; + </p> + <p> + The winds, her lacqueys, flew with rapid course; + </p> + <p> + Alert, but obstinate, with pow'rful force. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WITH all her art th' enchantress could not find, + </p> + <p> + A charm to guard her 'gainst the urchin blind; + </p> + <p> + Though she'd the pow'r to stop the star of day, + </p> + <p> + She burned to gain a being formed of clay. + </p> + <p> + If merely a salute her wish had been, + </p> + <p> + She might have had it, easily was seen; + </p> + <p> + But bliss unbounded clearly was her view, + </p> + <p> + And this with anxious ardour she'd pursue. + </p> + <p> + Though charms she had, still Damon would remain, + </p> + <p> + To her who had his heart a faithful swain: + </p> + <p> + In vain she sought the genial soft caress: + </p> + <p> + To Neria naught but friendship he'd express. + </p> + <p> + Like Damon, husbands nowhere now are found, + </p> + <p> + And I'm not certain, such were e'er on ground. + </p> + <p> + I rather fancy, hist'ry is not here, + </p> + <p> + What we would wish, since truth it don't revere, + </p> + <p> + I nothing in the hippogriff perceive, + </p> + <p> + Or lance enchanted, but we may believe; + </p> + <p> + Yet this I must confess has raised surprise, + </p> + <p> + Howe'er, to pass it will perhaps suffice; + </p> + <p> + I've many passed the same,—in ancient days; + </p> + <p> + Men different were from us: had other ways; + </p> + <p> + Unlike the present manners, we'll suppose; + </p> + <p> + Or history would other facts disclose. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE am'rous Neria to obtain her end, + </p> + <p> + Made use of philters, and would e'en descend; + </p> + <p> + To ev'ry wily look and secret art, + </p> + <p> + That could to him she loved her flame impart. + </p> + <p> + Our swain his marriage vow to this opposed; + </p> + <p> + At which th' enchantress much surprise disclosed. + </p> + <p> + You doubtless fancy, she exclaimed one day, + </p> + <p> + That your fidelity must worth display; + </p> + <p> + But I should like to know if equal care, + </p> + <p> + Calista takes to act upon the square. + </p> + <p> + Suppose your wife had got a smart gallant, + </p> + <p> + Would you refuse as much a fair to grant? + </p> + <p> + And if Calista, careless of your fame, + </p> + <p> + Should carry to extremes a guilty flame, + </p> + <p> + Would you but half way go? I truly thought, + </p> + <p> + By sturdy hymen thus you'd not be caught. + </p> + <p> + Domestick joys should be to cits confined; + </p> + <p> + For none but such were scenes like those designed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BUT as to you:—decline Love's choice pursuit! + </p> + <p> + No anxious wish to taste forbidden fruit? + </p> + <p> + Though such you banish from your thoughts I see, + </p> + <p> + A friend thereto I fain would have you be. + </p> + <p> + Come make the trial: you'll Calista find, + </p> + <p> + Quite new again when to her arms resigned. + </p> + <p> + But let me tell you, though your wife be chaste, + </p> + <p> + Erastus to your mansion oft is traced. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AND do you think, cried Damon with an air, + </p> + <p> + Erastus visits as a lover there? + </p> + <p> + Too much he seems, my friend, to act a part, + </p> + <p> + That proves the villain both in head and heart. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SAID Neria, mortified at this reply, + </p> + <p> + Though he's a friend on whom you may rely, + </p> + <p> + Calista beauty has; much worth the man, + </p> + <p> + With smart address to execute his plan; + </p> + <p> + And when we meet accomplishments so rare; + </p> + <p> + Few women but will tumble in the snare. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS conversation was by Damon felt, + </p> + <p> + A wife, brisk, young, and formed 'mid joys to melt; + </p> + <p> + A man well versed in Cupid's wily way; + </p> + <p> + No courtier bolder of the present day; + </p> + <p> + Well made and handsome, with attractive mind; + </p> + <p> + Wo what might happen was the husband blind? + </p> + <p> + Whoever trusts implicitly to friends, + </p> + <p> + Too oft will find, on shadows he depends. + </p> + <p> + Pray where's the devotee, who could withstand, + </p> + <p> + The tempting glimpse of charms that all command; + </p> + <p> + Which first invite by halves: then bolder grow, + </p> + <p> + Till fascination spreads, and bosoms glow? + </p> + <p> + Our Damon fancied this already done, + </p> + <p> + Or, at the best, might be too soon begun: + </p> + <p> + On these foundations gloomy views arose, + </p> + <p> + Chimeras dire, destructive of repose. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TH' enchantress presently a hint received, + </p> + <p> + That those suspicions much the husband grieved; + </p> + <p> + And better to succeed and make him fret, + </p> + <p> + She told him of a thing, 'mong witches met, + </p> + <p> + 'Twas metamorphose-water (such the name) + </p> + <p> + With this could Damon take Erastus' frame; + </p> + <p> + His gait, his look, his carriage, air and voice + </p> + <p> + Thus changed, he easily could mark her choice, + </p> + <p> + Each step observe:—enough, he asked no more, + </p> + <p> + Erastus' shape the husband quickly bore; + </p> + <p> + His easy manner, and appearance caught: + </p> + <p> + With captivating smiles his wife he sought. + </p> + <p> + And thus addressed the fair with ev'ry grace:— + </p> + <p> + How blithe that look! enchanting is your face; + </p> + <p> + Your beauty's always great, I needs must say, + </p> + <p> + But never more delightful than to-day. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + CALISTA saw the flatt'ring lover's scheme; + </p> + <p> + And turned to ridicule the wily theme. + </p> + <p> + His manner Damon changed, from gay to grave: + </p> + <p> + Now sighs, then tears; but nothing could enslave; + </p> + <p> + The lady, virtue firmly would maintain; + </p> + <p> + At length, the husband, seeing all was vain, + </p> + <p> + Proposed a bribe, and offered such a sum, + </p> + <p> + Her anger dropt: the belle was overcome. + </p> + <p> + The price was very large, it might excuse, + </p> + <p> + Though she at first was prompted to refuse; + </p> + <p> + At last, howe'er her chastity gave way: + </p> + <p> + To gold's allurements few will offer nay! + </p> + <p> + The cash, resistance had so fully laid, + </p> + <p> + Surrender would at any time be made. + </p> + <p> + The precious ore has universal charms, + </p> + <p> + Enchains the will, or sets the world in arms! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THOUGH elegant your form, and smart your dress, + </p> + <p> + Your air, your language, ev'ry warmth express + </p> + <p> + Yet, if a banker, or a financier, + </p> + <p> + With handsome presents happen to appear, + </p> + <p> + At once is blessed the wealthy paramour, + </p> + <p> + While you a year may languish at the door. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0206m.jpg" alt="0206m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0206.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + THIS heart, inflexible, it seems, gave ground, + </p> + <p> + To money's pow'rful, all-subduing sound; + </p> + <p> + The rock now disappeared—and, in its stead, + </p> + <p> + A lamb was found, quite easy to be led, + </p> + <p> + Who, as a proof, resistance she would wave, + </p> + <p> + A kiss, by way of earnest freely gave. + </p> + <p> + No further would the husband push the dame, + </p> + <p> + Nor be himself a witness of his shame, + </p> + <p> + But straight resumed his form, and to his wife, + </p> + <p> + Cried, O Calista! once my soul and life + </p> + <p> + Calista, whom I fondly cherished long; + </p> + <p> + Calista, whose affection was so strong; + </p> + <p> + Is gold more dear than hearts in union twined? + </p> + <p> + To wash thy guilt, thy blood should be assigned. + </p> + <p> + But still I love thee, spite of evil thought; + </p> + <p> + My death will pay the ills thou'st on me brought. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE metamorphosis our dame surprised; + </p> + <p> + To give relief her tears but just sufficed; + </p> + <p> + She scarcely spoke; the husband, days remained, + </p> + <p> + Reflecting on the circumstance that pained. + </p> + <p> + Himself a cuckold could he ever make, + </p> + <p> + By mere design a liberty to take? + </p> + <p> + But, horned or not? the question seemed to be, + </p> + <p> + When Neria told him, if from doubts not free, + </p> + <p> + Drink from the cup:—with so much art 'tis made, + </p> + <p> + That, whose'er of cuckoldom 's afraid, + </p> + <p> + Let him but put it to his eager lips + </p> + <p> + If he's a cuckold, out the liquor slips; + </p> + <p> + He naught can swallow; and the whole is thrown + </p> + <p> + About his face or clothes, as oft 's been shown. + </p> + <p> + But should, from out his brow, no horns yet pop— + </p> + <p> + He drinks the whole, nor spills a single drop. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE doubt to solve, our husband took a sup, + </p> + <p> + From this famed, formidably, magick cup; + </p> + <p> + Nor did he any of the liquor waste:— + </p> + <p> + Well, I am safe, said he, my wife is chaste, + </p> + <p> + Though on myself it wholly could depend; + </p> + <p> + But from it what have I to apprehend? + </p> + <p> + Make room, good folks, who leafless branches wear; + </p> + <p> + If you desire those honours I should share. + </p> + <p> + Thus Damon spoke, and to his precious wife + </p> + <p> + A curious sermon preached, it seems, on life. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IF cuckoldom, my friends, such torments give; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis better far 'mong savages to live! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + LEST worse should happen, Damon settled spies, + </p> + <p> + Who, o'er his lady watched with Argus' eyes. + </p> + <p> + She turned coquette; restraints the FAIR awake, + </p> + <p> + And only prompt more liberties to take. + </p> + <p> + The silly husband secrets tried to know, + </p> + <p> + And rather seemed to seek the wily foe, + </p> + <p> + Which fear has often rendered fatal round, + </p> + <p> + When otherwise the ill had ne'er been found. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + FOUR times an hour his lips to sip he placed; + </p> + <p> + And clearly, for a week was not disgraced. + </p> + <p> + Howe'er, no further went his ease of mind; + </p> + <p> + Oh, fatal science! fatally designed! + </p> + <p> + With fury Damon threw the cup away, + </p> + <p> + And, in his rage, himself inclined to slay. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HIS wife he straight shut up within a tower, + </p> + <p> + Where, morn and night, he showed a husband's pow'r, + </p> + <p> + Reproach bestowed: while she bewailed her lot, + </p> + <p> + 'Twere better far, if he'd concealed the blot; + </p> + <p> + For now, from mouth to mouth, and ear to ear, + </p> + <p> + It echoed, and re-echoed far and near. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + MEANWHILE Calista led a wretched life; + </p> + <p> + No gold nor jewels Damon left his wife, + </p> + <p> + Which made the jailer faithful, since 'twere vain + </p> + <p> + To hope, unbribed, this Cerberus to gain. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT length, the wife a lucky moment sought, + </p> + <p> + When Damon seemed by soft caresses caught. + </p> + <p> + Said she, I've guilty been, I freely own; + </p> + <p> + But though my crime is great, I'm not alone; + </p> + <p> + Alas! how few escape from like mishap; + </p> + <p> + 'Mong Hymen's band so common is the trap; + </p> + <p> + And though at you the immaculate may smile, + </p> + <p> + What use to fret and all the sex revile? <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WELL I'll console myself, and pardon you, + </p> + <p> + Cried Damon, when sufficient I can view, + </p> + <p> + Of ornamented foreheads, just like mine, + </p> + <p> + To form among themselves a royal line; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis only to employ the magick cup, + </p> + <p> + From which I learned your secrets by a sup. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HIS plan to execute, the husband went, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry passenger was thither sent, + </p> + <p> + Where Damon entertained, with sumptuous fare; + </p> + <p> + And, at the end, proposed the magick snare: + </p> + <p> + Said he, my wife played truant to my bed; + </p> + <p> + Wish you to know if your's be e'er misled? + </p> + <p> + 'Tis right how things go on at home to trace, + </p> + <p> + And if upon the cup your lips you place, + </p> + <p> + In case your wife be chaste, there'll naught go wrong; + </p> + <p> + But, if to Vulcan's troop you should belong, + </p> + <p> + And prove an antlered brother, you will spill + </p> + <p> + The liquor ev'ry way, in spite of skill. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TO all the men, that Damon could collect, + </p> + <p> + The cup he offered, and they tried th' effect; + </p> + <p> + But few escaped, at which they laughed or cried, + </p> + <p> + As feelings led, or cuckoldom they spied, + </p> + <p> + Whose surly countenance the wags believed, + </p> + <p> + In many houses near, might be perceived. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ALREADY Damon had sufficient found, + </p> + <p> + To form a regiment and march around; + </p> + <p> + At times they threatened governors to hang, + </p> + <p> + Unless they would surrender to their gang; + </p> + <p> + But few they wanted to complete the force, + </p> + <p> + And soon a royal army made of course. + </p> + <p> + From day to day their numbers would augment, + </p> + <p> + Without the beat of drum, to great extent; + </p> + <p> + Their rank was always fixed by length of horn: + </p> + <p> + Foot soldiers those, whose branches short were borne; + </p> + <p> + Dragoons, lieutenants, captains, some became, + </p> + <p> + And even colonels, those of greater fame. + </p> + <p> + The portion spilled by each from out the vase + </p> + <p> + Was taken for the length, and fixed the place. + </p> + <p> + A wight, who in an instant spilled the whole, + </p> + <p> + Was made a gen'ral: not commander sole, + </p> + <p> + For many followed of the same degree, + </p> + <p> + And 'twas determined they should equals be. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE rank and file now nearly found complete, + </p> + <p> + And full enough an enemy to beat, + </p> + <p> + Young Reynold, nephew of famed Charlemain, + </p> + <p> + By chance came by: the spark they tried to gain, + </p> + <p> + And, after treating him with sumptuous cheer, + </p> + <p> + At length the magick cup mas made appear; + </p> + <p> + But no way Reynold could be led to drink: + </p> + <p> + My wife, cried he, I truly faithful think, + </p> + <p> + And that's enough; the cup can nothing more; + </p> + <p> + Should I, who sleep with two eyes, sleep with four? + </p> + <p> + I feel at ease, thank heav'n, and have no dread, + </p> + <p> + Then why to seek new cares should I be led? + </p> + <p> + Perhaps, if I the cup should hold awry, + </p> + <p> + The liquor out might on a sudden fly; + </p> + <p> + I'm sometimes awkward, and in case the cup + </p> + <p> + Should fancy me another, who would sup, + </p> + <p> + The error, doubtless, might unpleasant be: + </p> + <p> + To any thing but this I will agree, + </p> + <p> + To give you pleasure, Damon, so adieu; + </p> + <p> + Then Reynold from the antlered corps withdrew. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SAID Damon, gentlemen, 'tis pretty clear, + </p> + <p> + So wise as Reynold, none of us appear; + </p> + <p> + But let's console ourselves;—'tis very plain, + </p> + <p> + The same are others:—to repine were vain. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT length, such numbers on their rolls they bore; + </p> + <p> + Calista liberty obtained once more, + </p> + <p> + As promised formerly, and then her charms + </p> + <p> + Again were taken to her spouse's arms. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + LET Reynold's conduct, husbands, be your line; + </p> + <p> + Who Damon's follows surely will repine. + </p> + <p> + Perhaps the first should have been made the chief; + </p> + <p> + Though, doubtless, that is matter of belief. + </p> + <p> + No mortal can from danger feel secure; + </p> + <p> + To be exempt from spilling, who is sure? + </p> + <p> + Nor Roland, Reynold, nor famed Charlemain, + </p> + <p> + But what had acted wrong to risk the stain. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Falcon" id="Falcon">THE FALCON</a> + </h2> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0212m.jpg" alt="0212m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0212.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + I RECOLLECT, that lately much I blamed, + </p> + <p> + The sort of lover, avaricious named; + </p> + <p> + And if in opposites we reason see, + </p> + <p> + The liberal in paradise should be. + </p> + <p> + The rule is just and, with the warmest zeal, + </p> + <p> + To prove the fact I to the CHURCH appeal. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IN Florence once there dwelled a gentle youth, + </p> + <p> + Who loved a certain beauteous belle with truth; + </p> + <p> + O'er all his actions she had full controul;— + </p> + <p> + To please he would have sold his very soul. + </p> + <p> + If she amusements wished, he'd lavish gold, + </p> + <p> + Convinced in love or war you should be bold; + </p> + <p> + The cash ne'er spare:—invincible its pow'rs, + </p> + <p> + O'erturning walls or doors where'er it show'rs. + </p> + <p> + The precious ore can every thing o'ercome; + </p> + <p> + 'Twill silence barking curs: make servants dumb; + </p> + <p> + And these can render eloquent at will:— + </p> + <p> + Excel e'en Tully in persuasive skill; + </p> + <p> + In short he'd leave no quarter unsubdued, + </p> + <p> + Unless therein the fair he could include. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SHE stood th' attack howe'er, and Frederick failed; + </p> + <p> + His force was vain whenever he assailed; + </p> + <p> + Without the least return his wealth he spent: + </p> + <p> + Lands, houses, manors of immense extent, + </p> + <p> + Were ev'ry now and then to auction brought; + </p> + <p> + To gratify his love was all he thought. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE rank of 'squire till lately he had claimed; + </p> + <p> + Now scarcely was he even mister named; + </p> + <p> + Of wealth by Cupid's stratagems bereft, + </p> + <p> + A single farm was all the man had left; + </p> + <p> + Friends very few, and such as God alone, + </p> + <p> + Could tell if friendship they might not disown; + </p> + <p> + The best were led their pity to express; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas all he got: it could not well be less; + </p> + <p> + To lend without security was wrong, + </p> + <p> + And former favours they'd forgotten long; + </p> + <p> + With all that Frederick could or say or do, + </p> + <p> + His liberal conduct soon was lost to view. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WITH Clytia he no longer was received, + </p> + <p> + Than while he was a man of wealth believed; + </p> + <p> + Balls, concerts, op'ras, tournaments, and plays, + </p> + <p> + Expensive dresses, all engaging ways, + </p> + <p> + Were used to captivate this lady fair, + </p> + <p> + While scarcely one around but in despair, + </p> + <p> + Wife, widow, maid, his fond affection sought; + </p> + <p> + To gain him, ev'ry wily art was brought; + </p> + <p> + But all in vain:—by passion overpow'red, + </p> + <p> + The belle, whose conduct others would have soured, + </p> + <p> + To him appeared a goddess full of charms, + </p> + <p> + Superior e'en to Helen, in his arms; + </p> + <p> + From whence we may conclude, the beauteous dame + </p> + <p> + Was always deaf to Fred'rick's ardent flame. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ENAMOURED of the belle, his lands he sold; + </p> + <p> + The family estates were turned to gold; + </p> + <p> + And many who the purchases had made, + </p> + <p> + With pelf accumulated by their trade, + </p> + <p> + Assumed the airs of men of noble birth:— + </p> + <p> + Fair subjects oft for ridicule and mirth! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + RICH Clytia was, and her good spouse, 'tis said, + </p> + <p> + Had lands which far and wide around were spread; + </p> + <p> + No cash nor presents she would ever take, + </p> + <p> + Yet suffered Frederick splendid treats to make, + </p> + <p> + Without designing recompense to grant, + </p> + <p> + Or being more than merely complaisant. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ALREADY, if my mem'ry do not fail, + </p> + <p> + I've said, the youth's estates were put to sale, + </p> + <p> + To pay for feasts the fair to entertain, + </p> + <p> + And what he'd left was only one domain, + </p> + <p> + A petty farm to which he now retired; + </p> + <p> + Ashamed to show where once so much admired, + </p> + <p> + And wretched too, a prey to lorn despair, + </p> + <p> + Unable to obtain by splendid care, + </p> + <p> + A beauty he'd pursued six years and more, + </p> + <p> + And should for ever fervently adore. + </p> + <p> + His want of merit was the cause he thought, + </p> + <p> + That she could never to his wish be brought, + </p> + <p> + While from him not a syllable was heard, + </p> + <p> + Against the lovely belle his soul preferred. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + 'MID poverty oft Fred'rick sighed and wept; + </p> + <p> + A toothless hag—his only servant kept; + </p> + <p> + His kitchen cold; (where commonly he dwelled;) + </p> + <p> + A pretty decent horse his stable held; + </p> + <p> + A falcon too; and round about the grange, + </p> + <p> + Our quondam 'squire repeatedly would range, + </p> + <p> + Where oft, to melancholy, he was led, + </p> + <p> + To sacrifice the game which near him fed; + </p> + <p> + By Clytia's cruelty the gun was seized, + </p> + <p> + And feathered victims black chagrin appeased. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + 'TWAS thus the lover whiled his hours away; + </p> + <p> + His heart-felt torments nothing could allay; + </p> + <p> + Blessed if with fortune love he'd also lost, + </p> + <p> + Which constantly his earthly comforts crossed; + </p> + <p> + But this lorn passion preyed upon his mind:— + </p> + <p> + Where'er he rode, BLACK CARE would mount behind. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + DEATH took at length the husband of the fair; + </p> + <p> + An only son appointed was his heir, + </p> + <p> + A sickly child, whose life, 'twas pretty plain, + </p> + <p> + Could scarcely last till spring returned again, + </p> + <p> + Which made the husband, by his will, decree, + </p> + <p> + His wife the infant's successor should be, + </p> + <p> + In case the babe at early years should die, + </p> + <p> + Who soon grew worse and raised the widow's sigh. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TOO much affection parents ne'er can show:— + </p> + <p> + A mother's feelings none but mothers know. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + FAIR Clytia round her child with anxious care, + </p> + <p> + Watched day and night, and no expense would spare; + </p> + <p> + Inquired if this or that would please his taste; + </p> + <p> + What he desired should be procured with haste; + </p> + <p> + But nothing would he have that she proposed; + </p> + <p> + An ardent wish howe'er the boy disclosed, + </p> + <p> + For Fred'rick's Falcon, and most anxious grew:— + </p> + <p> + Tear followed tear, and nothing else would do. + </p> + <p> + When once a child has got a whim in brain, + </p> + <p> + No peace, no rest, till he the boon obtain. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WE should observe our belle, near Fred'rick's cot, + </p> + <p> + A handsome house and many lands had got; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas there the lovely babe had lately heard, + </p> + <p> + Most wondrous stories of the bird averred; + </p> + <p> + No partridge e'er escaped its rapid wing:— + </p> + <p> + On every morn down numbers it would bring; + </p> + <p> + No money for it would its owner take; + </p> + <p> + Much grieved was Clytia such request to make. + </p> + <p> + The man, for her, of wealth had been bereft; + </p> + <p> + How ask the only treasure he had left? + </p> + <p> + And him if she were led to importune, + </p> + <p> + Could she expect that he'd accord the boon? + </p> + <p> + Alas! ungratefully she oft repaid, + </p> + <p> + His liberal treats, his concerts, serenade, + </p> + <p> + And haughtily behaved from first to last: + </p> + <p> + How be so bold, (reflecting on the past,) + </p> + <p> + To see the man that she so ill had used? + </p> + <p> + And ask a favour?—could she be excused? + </p> + <p> + But then her child!—perhaps his life 'twould save; + </p> + <p> + Naught would he take; the falcon she must crave. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THAT her sweet babe might be induced to eat, + </p> + <p> + So meant the bird of Fred'rick to intreat; + </p> + <p> + Her boy was heard continually to cry, + </p> + <p> + Unless he had the falcon, he should die. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THESE reasons strongly with the mother weighed; + </p> + <p> + Her visit to the 'squire was not delayed; + </p> + <p> + With fond affection for her darling heir, + </p> + <p> + One morn, alone she sought the lorn repair. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TO Fred'rick's eye an angel she appeared; + </p> + <p> + But shame he felt, that she, his soul revered, + </p> + <p> + Should find him poor:—no servants to attend, + </p> + <p> + Nor means to give a dinner to a friend. + </p> + <p> + The poverty in which he now was viewed, + </p> + <p> + Distressed his mind and all his griefs renewed. + </p> + <p> + Why come? said he; what led you thus to trace, + </p> + <p> + An humble slave of your celestial face? + </p> + <p> + A villager, a wretched being here; + </p> + <p> + Too great the honour doubtless must appear; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas somewhere else you surely meant to go? + </p> + <p> + The lady in a moment answered no. + </p> + <p> + Cried he, I've neither cook nor kettle left; + </p> + <p> + Then how can I receive you, thus bereft? + </p> + <p> + But you have bread, said Clytia:—that will do;— + </p> + <p> + The lover quickly to the poultry flew, + </p> + <p> + In search of eggs; some bacon too he found; + </p> + <p> + But nothing else, except the hawk renowned, + </p> + <p> + Which caught his eye, and instantly was seized, + </p> + <p> + Slain, plucked, and made a fricassee that pleased. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0220m.jpg" alt="0220m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0220.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + MEANWHILE the house-keeper for linen sought; + </p> + <p> + Knives, forks, plates, spoons, cups, glass and chairs she + </p> + <p> + brought; + </p> + <p> + The fricassee was served, the dame partook, + </p> + <p> + And on the dish with pleasure seemed to look. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE dinner o'er, the widow then resolved, + </p> + <p> + To ask the boon which in her mind resolved. + </p> + <p> + She thus begun:—good sir, you'll think me mad, + </p> + <p> + To come and to your breast fresh trouble add; + </p> + <p> + I've much to ask, and you will feel surprise, + </p> + <p> + That one, for whom your love could ne'er suffice, + </p> + <p> + Should now request your celebrated bird; + </p> + <p> + Can I expect the grant?—the thought 's absurd + </p> + <p> + But pardon pray a mother's anxious fear; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis for my child:—his life to me is dear. + </p> + <p> + The falcon solely can the infant save; + </p> + <p> + Yet since to you I nothing ever gave, + </p> + <p> + For all your kindness oft on me bestowed; + </p> + <p> + Your fortune wasted:—e'en your nice abode, + </p> + <p> + Alas! disposed of, large supplies to raise, + </p> + <p> + To entertain and please in various ways: + </p> + <p> + I cannot hope this falcon to obtain; + </p> + <p> + For sure I am the expectation's vane; + </p> + <p> + No, rather perish child and mother too; + </p> + <p> + Than such uneasiness should you pursue: + </p> + <p> + Allow howe'er this parent, I beseech, + </p> + <p> + Who loves her offspring 'yond the pow'r of speech, + </p> + <p> + Or language to express, her only boy, + </p> + <p> + Sole hope, sole comfort, all her earthly joy, + </p> + <p> + True mother like, to seek her child's relief, + </p> + <p> + And in your breast deposit now her grief. + </p> + <p> + Affection's pow'r none better know than you,— + </p> + <p> + How few to love were ever half so true! + </p> + <p> + From such a bosom I may pardon crave + </p> + <p> + Soft pity's ever with the good and brave! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ALAS! the wretched lover straight replied, + </p> + <p> + The bird was all I could for you provide; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas served for dinner.—Dead?—exclaimed the dame, + </p> + <p> + While trembling terror overspread her frame. + </p> + <p> + No jest, said he, and from the soul I wish, + </p> + <p> + My heart, instead of that, had been the dish; + </p> + <p> + But doomed alas! am I by fate, 'tis clear, + </p> + <p> + To find no grace with her my soul holds dear: + </p> + <p> + I'd nothing left; and when I saw the bird, + </p> + <p> + To kill it instantly the thought occurred; + </p> + <p> + Those naught we grudge nor spare to entertain, + </p> + <p> + Who o'er our feeling bosoms sov'reign reign: + </p> + <p> + All I can do is speedily to get, + </p> + <p> + Another falcon: easily they're met; + </p> + <p> + And by to-morrow I'll the bird procure. + </p> + <p> + No, Fred'rick, she replied, I now conjure + </p> + <p> + You'll think no more about it; what you've done + </p> + <p> + Is all that fondness could have shown a son; + </p> + <p> + And whether fate has doomed the child to die, + </p> + <p> + Or with my prayers the pow'rs above comply; + </p> + <p> + For you my gratitude will never end— + </p> + <p> + Pray let us hope to see you as a friend. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THEN Clytia took her leave, and gave her hand; + </p> + <p> + A proof his love no more she would withstand. + </p> + <p> + He kissed and bathed her fingers with his tears; + </p> + <p> + The second day grim death confirmed their fears: <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE mourning lasted long and mother's grief; + </p> + <p> + But days and months at length bestowed relief; + </p> + <p> + No wretchedness so great, we may depend, + </p> + <p> + But what, to time's all-conqu'ring sithe will bend: <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0224m.jpg" alt="0224m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0224.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + TWO famed physicians managed with such care; + </p> + <p> + That they recovered her from wild despair, + </p> + <p> + And tears gave place to cheerfulness and joy:— + </p> + <p> + The one was TIME the other Venus' Boy. + </p> + <p> + Her hand fair Clytia on the youth bestowed, + </p> + <p> + As much from love as what to him she owed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + LET not this instance howsoe'r mislead; + </p> + <p> + 'Twere wrong with hope our fond desires to feed, + </p> + <p> + And waste our substance thus:—not all the FAIR, + </p> + <p> + Possess of gratitude a decent share. + </p> + <p> + With this exception they appear divine; + </p> + <p> + In lovely WOMAN angel-charms combine; + </p> + <p> + The whole indeed I do not here include; + </p> + <p> + Alas; too many act the jilt and prude. + </p> + <p> + When kind, they're ev'ry blessing found below: + </p> + <p> + When otherwise a curse we often know. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + + <p> + <a name="p165" id="p165"></a><img alt="p165.jpg (34K)" + src="images/p165.jpg" height="503" width="665" /> + </p> + + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Little_Dog" id="Little_Dog"></a>THE LITTLE DOG + </h2><p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">T</span>HE key, which opes the chest of hoarded gold. + </p> + <p> + Unlocks the heart that favours would withhold. + </p> + <p> + To this the god of love has oft recourse, + </p> + <p> + When arrows fail to reach the secret source, + </p> + <p> + And I'll maintain he's right, for, 'mong mankind, + </p> + <p> + Nice presents ev'ry where we pleasing find; + </p> + <p> + Kings, princes, potentates, receive the same, + </p> + <p> + And when a lady thinks she's not to blame, + </p> + <p> + To do what custom tolerates around; + </p> + <p> + When Venus' acts are only Themis' found, + </p> + <p> + I'll nothing 'gainst her say; more faults than one, + </p> + <p> + Besides the present, have their course begun. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A MANTUAN judge espoused a beauteous fair: + </p> + <p> + Her name was Argia:—Anselm was her care, + </p> + <p> + An aged dotard, trembling with alarms, + </p> + <p> + While she was young, and blessed with seraph charms. + </p> + <p> + But, not content with such a pleasing prize, + </p> + <p> + His jealousy appeared without disguise, + </p> + <p> + Which greater admiration round her drew, + </p> + <p> + Who doubtless merited, in ev'ry view, + </p> + <p> + Attention from the first in rank or place + </p> + <p> + So elegant her form, so fine her face. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0228m.jpg" alt="0228m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0228.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + 'TWOULD endless prove, and nothing would avail, + </p> + <p> + Each lover's pain minutely to detail: + </p> + <p> + Their arts and wiles; enough 'twill be no doubt, + </p> + <p> + To say the lady's heart was found so stout, + </p> + <p> + She let them sigh their precious hours away, + </p> + <p> + And scarcely seemed emotion to betray. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHILE at the judge's, Cupid was employed, + </p> + <p> + Some weighty things the Mantuan state annoyed, + </p> + <p> + Of such importance, that the rulers meant, + </p> + <p> + An embassy should to the Pope be sent. + </p> + <p> + As Anselm was a judge of high degree, + </p> + <p> + No one so well embassador could be. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + 'TWAS with reluctance he agreed to go, + </p> + <p> + And be at Rome their mighty Plenipo'; + </p> + <p> + The business would be long, and he must dwell + </p> + <p> + Six months or more abroad, he could not tell. + </p> + <p> + Though great the honour, he should leave his dove, + </p> + <p> + Which would be painful to connubial love. + </p> + <p> + Long embassies and journeys far from home + </p> + <p> + Oft cuckoldom around induce to roam. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE husband, full of fears about his wife; + </p> + <p> + Exclaimed—my ever—darling, precious life, + </p> + <p> + I must away; adieu, be faithful pray, + </p> + <p> + To one whose heart from you can never stray + </p> + <p> + But swear to me, my duck, (for, truth to tell, + </p> + <p> + I've reason to be jealous of my belle,) + </p> + <p> + Now swear these sparks, whose ardour I perceive, + </p> + <p> + Have sighed without success, and I'll believe. + </p> + <p> + But still your honour better to secure, + </p> + <p> + From slander's tongue, and virtue to ensure, + </p> + <p> + I'd have you to our country-house repair; + </p> + <p> + The city quit:—these sly gallants beware; + </p> + <p> + Their presents too, accurst invention found, + </p> + <p> + With danger fraught, and ever much renowned; + </p> + <p> + For always in the world, where lovers move, + </p> + <p> + These gifts the parent of assentment prove. + </p> + <p> + 'Gainst those declare at once; nor lend an ear + </p> + <p> + To flattery, their cunning sister-peer. + </p> + <p> + If they approach, shut straight both ears and eyes; + </p> + <p> + For nothing you shall want that wealth supplies; + </p> + <p> + My store you may command; the key behold, + </p> + <p> + Where I've deposited my notes and gold. + </p> + <p> + Receive my rents; expend whate'er you please; + </p> + <p> + I'll look for no accounts; live quite at ease; + </p> + <p> + I shall be satisfied with what you do, + </p> + <p> + If naught therein to raise a blush I view; + </p> + <p> + You've full permission to amuse your mind; + </p> + <p> + Your love, howe'er, for me alone's designed; + </p> + <p> + That, recollect, must be for my return, + </p> + <p> + For which our bosoms will with ardour burn. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE good man's bounty seemingly was sweet; + </p> + <p> + All pleasures, one excepted, she might greet; + </p> + <p> + But that, alas! by bosoms unpossessed, + </p> + <p> + No happiness arises from the rest: + </p> + <p> + His lady promised ev'ry thing required:— + </p> + <p> + Deaf, blind, and cruel,—whosoe'er admired; + </p> + <p> + And not a present would her hand receive + </p> + <p> + At his return, he fully might believe, + </p> + <p> + She would be found the same as when he went, + </p> + <p> + Without gallant, or aught to discontent. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HER husband gone, she presently retired + </p> + <p> + Where Anselm had so earnestly desired; + </p> + <p> + The lovers came, but they were soon dismissed, + </p> + <p> + And told, from visits they must all desist; + </p> + <p> + Their assiduities were irksome grown, + </p> + <p> + And she was weary of their lovesick tone. + </p> + <p> + Save one, they all were odious to the fair; + </p> + <p> + A handsome youth, with smart engaging air; + </p> + <p> + But whose attentions to the belle were vain; + </p> + <p> + In spite of arts, his aim he could not gain; + </p> + <p> + His name was Atis, known to love and arms, + </p> + <p> + Who grudged no pains, could he possess her charms. + </p> + <p> + Each wile he tried, and if he'd kept to sighs, + </p> + <p> + No doubt the source is one that never dries; + </p> + <p> + But often diff'rent with expense 'tis found; + </p> + <p> + His wealth was wasted rapidly around + </p> + <p> + He wretched grew; at length for debt he fled, + </p> + <p> + And sought a desert to conceal his head. + </p> + <p> + As on the road he moved, a clown he met, + </p> + <p> + Who with his stick an adder tried to get, + </p> + <p> + From out a thicket, where it hissing lay, + </p> + <p> + And hoped to drive the countryman away: + </p> + <p> + Our knight his object asked; the clown replied, + </p> + <p> + To slay the reptile anxiously I tried; + </p> + <p> + Wherever met, an adder I would kill: + </p> + <p> + The race should be extinct if I'd my will. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHY would'st thou, friend, said Atis, these destroy? + </p> + <p> + God meant that all should freely life enjoy. + </p> + <p> + The youthful knight for reptiles had, we find, + </p> + <p> + Less dread than what prevails with human kind; + </p> + <p> + He bore them in his arms:—they marked his birth; + </p> + <p> + From noble Cadmus sprung, who, when on earth, + </p> + <p> + At last, to serpent was in age transformed; + </p> + <p> + The adder's bush the clown no longer stormed; + </p> + <p> + No more the spotted reptile sought to stay, + </p> + <p> + But seized the time, and quickly crept away. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT length our lover to a wood retired; + </p> + <p> + To live concealed was what the youth desired; + </p> + <p> + Lorn silence reigned, except from birds that sang, + </p> + <p> + And dells that oft with sweetest echo rang. + </p> + <p> + There HAPPINESS and frightful MIS'RY lay, + </p> + <p> + Quite undistinguished: classed with beasts of prey; + </p> + <p> + That growling prowled in search of food around: + </p> + <p> + There Atis consolation never found. + </p> + <p> + LOVE thither followed, and, however viewed, + </p> + <p> + 'Twas vain to hope his passion to elude; + </p> + <p> + Retirement fed the tender, ardent flame, + </p> + <p> + And irksome ev'ry minute soon became. + </p> + <p> + Let us return, cried he, since such our fate: + </p> + <p> + 'Tis better, Atis, bear her frowns and hate, + </p> + <p> + Than of her beauteous features lose the view; + </p> + <p> + Ye nightingales and streams, ye woods adieu! + </p> + <p> + When far from her I neither see nor hear: + </p> + <p> + 'Tis she alone my senses still revere; + </p> + <p> + A slave I am, who fled her dire disdain; + </p> + <p> + Yet seek once more to wear the cruel chain. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AS near some noble walls our knight arrived, + </p> + <p> + Which fairy-hands to raise had once contrived, + </p> + <p> + His eyes beheld, at peep of early morn, + </p> + <p> + When bright Aurora's beams the earth adorn, + </p> + <p> + A beauteous nymph in royal robes attired, + </p> + <p> + Of noble mien, and formed to be admired, + </p> + <p> + Who t'ward him drew, with pleasing, gracious air, + </p> + <p> + While he was wrapped in thought, a prey to care. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SAID she, I'd have you, Atis, happy be; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis in my pow'r, and this I hope to see; + </p> + <p> + A fairy greet me, Manto is my name:— + </p> + <p> + Your friend, and one you've served unknown:—the same + </p> + <p> + My fame you've heard, no doubt; from me proceeds + </p> + <p> + The Mantuan town, renowned for ancient deeds; + </p> + <p> + In days of yore I these foundations laid, + </p> + <p> + Which in duration, equal I have made, + </p> + <p> + To those of Memphis, where the Nile's proud course + </p> + <p> + Majestically flows from hidden source. + </p> + <p> + The cruel Parcae are to us unknown; + </p> + <p> + We wond'rous magick pow'rs have often shown; + </p> + <p> + But wretched, spite of this, appears our lot + </p> + <p> + Death never comes, though various ills we've got, + </p> + <p> + For we to human maladies are prone, + </p> + <p> + And suffer greatly oft, I freely own. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ONCE, in each week to serpents we are changed; + </p> + <p> + Do you remember how you here arranged, + </p> + <p> + To save an adder from a clown's attack? + </p> + <p> + 'Twas I, the furious rustick wished to hack, + </p> + <p> + When you assisted me to get away; + </p> + <p> + For recompense, my friend, without delay, + </p> + <p> + I'll you procure the kindness of the fair, + </p> + <p> + Who makes you love and drives you to despair: + </p> + <p> + We'll go and see her:—be assured from me, + </p> + <p> + Before two days are passed, as I foresee, + </p> + <p> + You'll gain, by presents, Argia and the rest, + </p> + <p> + Who round her watch, and are the suitor's pest. + </p> + <p> + Grudge no expense, be gen'rous, and be bold, + </p> + <p> + Your handfuls scatter, lavish be of gold. + </p> + <p> + Assured you shall not want the precious ore; + </p> + <p> + For I command the whole of Plutus' store, + </p> + <p> + Preserved, to please me, in the shades below; + </p> + <p> + This charmer soon our magick pow'r shall know. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE better to approach the cruel belle, + </p> + <p> + And to your suit her prompt consent compel, + </p> + <p> + Myself transformed you'll presently perceive; + </p> + <p> + And, as a little dog, I'll much achieve, + </p> + <p> + Around and round I'll gambol o'er the lawn, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry way attempt to please and fawn, + </p> + <p> + While you, a pilgrim, shall the bag-pipe play; + </p> + <p> + Come, bring me to the dame without delay. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NO sooner said, the lover quickly changed, + </p> + <p> + Together with the fairy, as arranged; + </p> + <p> + A pilgrim he, like Orpheus, piped and sang; + </p> + <p> + While Manto, as a dog, skipt, jumped, and sprang. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THEY thus proceeded to the beauteous dame; + </p> + <p> + Soon valets, maids, and others round them came; + </p> + <p> + The dog and pilgrim gave extreme delight + </p> + <p> + And all were quite diverted at the sight. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE lady heard the noise, and sent her maid, + </p> + <p> + To learn the reason why they romped and played: + </p> + <p> + She soon returned and told the lovely belle, + </p> + <p> + A spaniel danced, and even spoke so well, + </p> + <p> + it ev'ry thing could fully understand, + </p> + <p> + And showed obedience to the least command. + </p> + <p> + 'Twere better come herself and take a view: + </p> + <p> + The things were wond'rous that the dog could do. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE dame at any price the dog would buy, + </p> + <p> + In case the master should the boon deny. + </p> + <p> + To give the dog our pilgrim was desired; + </p> + <p> + But though he would not grant the thing required; + </p> + <p> + He whispered to the maid the price he'd take, + </p> + <p> + And some proposals was induced to make. + </p> + <p> + Said he, 'tis true, the creature 's not for sale; + </p> + <p> + Nor would I give it: prayers will ne'er prevail; + </p> + <p> + Whate'er I chance to want from day to day, + </p> + <p> + It furnishes without the least delay. + </p> + <p> + To have my wish, three words alone I use, + </p> + <p> + Its paw I squeeze, and whatsoe'er I choose, + </p> + <p> + Of gold, or jewels, fall upon the ground; + </p> + <p> + Search all the world, there's nothing like it found. + </p> + <p> + Your lady's rich, and money does not want; + </p> + <p> + Howe'er, my little dog to her I'll grant + </p> + <p> + If she'll a night permit me in her bed, + </p> + <p> + The treasure shall at once to her be led. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE maid at this proposal felt surprise; + </p> + <p> + Her mistress truly! less might well suffice; + </p> + <p> + A paltry knave! cried she, it makes me laugh; + </p> + <p> + What! take within her bed a pilgrim's staff! + </p> + <p> + Were such a circumstance abroad to get, + </p> + <p> + My lady would with ridicule be met; + </p> + <p> + The dog and master, probably, were last + </p> + <p> + Beneath a hedge, or on a dunghill cast; + </p> + <p> + A house like this they'll never see agen;— + </p> + <p> + But then the master is the pride of men, + </p> + <p> + And that in love is ev'ry thing we find + </p> + <p> + Much wealth and beauty please all womankind! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HIS features and his mien the knight had changed; + </p> + <p> + Each air and look for conquest were arranged. + </p> + <p> + The maid exclaimed: when such a lover sues, + </p> + <p> + How can a woman any thing refuse? + </p> + <p> + Besides the pilgrim has a dog, 'tis plain, + </p> + <p> + Not all the wealth of China could obtain. + </p> + <p> + Yet to possess my lady for a night, + </p> + <p> + Would to the master be supreme delight: <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + I SHOULD have mentioned, that our cunning spark; + </p> + <p> + The dog would whisper (feigning some remark,) + </p> + <p> + On which ten ducats tumbled at his feet; + </p> + <p> + These Atis gave the maid, (O deed discreet;) + </p> + <p> + Then fell a diamond: this our wily wight + </p> + <p> + Took up, and smiling at the precious sight, + </p> + <p> + Said he, what now I hold I beg you'll bear, + </p> + <p> + To her you serve, so worthy of your care; + </p> + <p> + Present my compliments, and to her say, + </p> + <p> + I'm her devoted servant from to-day. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THU female quickly to her mistress went; + </p> + <p> + Our charming little dog to represent: + </p> + <p> + The various pow'rs displayed, and wonders done; + </p> + <p> + Yet scarcely had she on the knight begun, + </p> + <p> + And mentioned what he wished her to unfold, + </p> + <p> + But Argia could her rage no longer hold; + </p> + <p> + A fellow! to presume, cried she, to speak + </p> + <p> + Of me with freedom!—I am not so weak, + </p> + <p> + To listen to such infamy, not I + </p> + <p> + A pilgrim too!—no, you may well rely, + </p> + <p> + E'en were he Atis, it would be the same, + </p> + <p> + To whom I now my cruel conduct blame: + </p> + <p> + Such things he never would to me propose; + </p> + <p> + Not e'en a monarch would the like disclose; + </p> + <p> + I'm 'bove temptation, presents would not do:— + </p> + <p> + Not Plutus' stores, if offered to my view; + </p> + <p> + A paltry pilgrim to presume indeed, + </p> + <p> + To think that I would such a blackguard heed, + </p> + <p> + Ambassadress my rank! and to admit + </p> + <p> + A fellow, only for the gallows fit! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS pilgrim, cried the maid, has got the means + </p> + <p> + Not only belles to get, but even queens; + </p> + <p> + Or beauteous goddesses he could obtain:— + </p> + <p> + He's worth a thousand Atis's 'tis plain. + </p> + <p> + Bur, said the wife, my husband made me vow. + </p> + <p> + What? cried the maid, you'd not bedeck his brow! + </p> + <p> + A pretty promise truly:—can you think, + </p> + <p> + You less from this, than from the first, should shrink? + </p> + <p> + Who'll know the fact, or publish it around? + </p> + <p> + Consider well, how many might be found, + </p> + <p> + Who, were they marked with spot upon the nose, + </p> + <p> + When things had taken place that we suppose, + </p> + <p> + Would not their heads so very lofty place, + </p> + <p> + I'm well assured, but feel their own disgrace. + </p> + <p> + For such a thing, are we the worse a hair? + </p> + <p> + No, no, good lady, who presumes to swear, + </p> + <p> + He can discern the lips which have been pressed, + </p> + <p> + By those that never have the fact confessed, + </p> + <p> + Must be possessed of penetrating eyes, + </p> + <p> + Which pierce the sable veil of dark disguise. + </p> + <p> + This favour, whether you accord or not, + </p> + <p> + 'Twill not a whit be less nor more a blot. + </p> + <p> + For whom, I pray, LOVE'S treasures would you hoard? + </p> + <p> + For one, who never will a treat afford, + </p> + <p> + Or what is much the same, has not the pow'r? + </p> + <p> + All he may want you'll give him in an hour, + </p> + <p> + At his return; he's very weak and old, + </p> + <p> + And, doubtless, ev'ry way is icy cold! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE cunning girl such rhetorick displayed, + </p> + <p> + That all she said, her mistress, having weighed, + </p> + <p> + Began to doubt alone, and not deny + </p> + <p> + The spaniel's art, and pilgrim's piercing eye: + </p> + <p> + To her the master and his dog were led, + </p> + <p> + To satisfy her mind while still in bed; + </p> + <p> + For bright Aurora, from the wat'ry deep, + </p> + <p> + Not more reluctantly arose from sleep. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR spark approached the dame with easy air, + </p> + <p> + Which seemed the man of fashion to declare; + </p> + <p> + His compliments were made with ev'ry grace, + </p> + <p> + That minds most difficult could wish to trace. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE fair was charmed, and with him quite content; + </p> + <p> + You do not look, said she, like one who meant + </p> + <p> + Saint James of Compostella soon to see, + </p> + <p> + Though, doubtless, oft to saints you bend the knee. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TO entertain the smiling beauteous dame, + </p> + <p> + The dog, by various tricks, confirmed his flame, + </p> + <p> + To please the maid and mistress he'd in view: + </p> + <p> + Too much for these of course he could not do; + </p> + <p> + Though, for the husband, he would never move, + </p> + <p> + The little fav'rite sought again to prove + </p> + <p> + His wond'rous worth, and scattered o'er the ground, + </p> + <p> + With sudden shake, among the servants round, + </p> + <p> + Nice pearls, which they on strings arranged with care; + </p> + <p> + And these the pilgrim offered to the fair: + </p> + <p> + Gallantly fastened them around her arms, + </p> + <p> + Admired their whiteness and extolled her charms: + </p> + <p> + So well he managed, 'twas at length agreed, + </p> + <p> + In what his heart desired he should succeed; + </p> + <p> + The dog was bought: the belle bestowed a kiss, + </p> + <p> + As earnest of the promised future bliss. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE night arrived, when Atis fondly pressed, + </p> + <p> + Within his arms, the lady thus caressed; + </p> + <p> + Himself he suddenly became again, + </p> + <p> + On which she scarcely could her joy contain:— + </p> + <p> + Th' ambassador she more respect should show, + </p> + <p> + Than favours on a pilgrim to bestow. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE fair and spark so much admired the night; + </p> + <p> + That others followed equal in delight; + </p> + <p> + Each felt the same, for where's the perfect shade; + </p> + <p> + That can conceal when joys like these pervade? + </p> + <p> + Expression strongly marks the youthful face, + </p> + <p> + And all that are not blind the truth can trace. + </p> + <p> + Some months had passed, when Anselm was dismissed; + </p> + <p> + Of gifts and pardons, long appeared his list; + </p> + <p> + A load of honours from the Pope he got:— + </p> + <p> + The CHURCH will these most lib'rally allot. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + FROM his vicegerent quickly he received + </p> + <p> + A good account, and friends his fears relieved; + </p> + <p> + The servants never dropt a single word + </p> + <p> + Of what had passed, but all to please concurred. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE judge, both maid and servants, questioned much; + </p> + <p> + But not a hint he got, their care was such. + </p> + <p> + Yet, as it often happens 'mong the FAIR, + </p> + <p> + The devil entered on a sudden there; + </p> + <p> + Such quarrels 'tween the maid and mistress rose, + </p> + <p> + The former vowed she would the tale disclose. + </p> + <p> + Revenge induced her ev'ry thing to tell, + </p> + <p> + Though she were implicated with the belle. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SO great the husband's rage, no words can speak: + </p> + <p> + His fury somewhere he of course would wreak; + </p> + <p> + But, since to paint it clearly would be vain— + </p> + <p> + You'll by the sequel judge his poignant pain. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A SERVANT Anselm ordered to convey + </p> + <p> + His wife a note, who was, without delay, + </p> + <p> + To come to town her honoured spouse to see; + </p> + <p> + Extremely ill (for such he feigned to be.) + </p> + <p> + As yet the lady in the country stayed; + </p> + <p> + Her husband to and fro' his visits paid. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SAID he, remember, when upon the road, + </p> + <p> + Conducting Argia from her lone abode, + </p> + <p> + You must contrive her men to get away, + </p> + <p> + And with her none but you presume to stay.— + </p> + <p> + A jade! she horns has planted on my brow: + </p> + <p> + Her death shall be the consequence I vow. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0242m.jpg" alt="0242m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0242.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + WITH force a poinard in her bosom thrust; + </p> + <p> + Watch well th' occasion:—die, I say, she must, + </p> + <p> + The deed performed, escape; here's for you aid; + </p> + <p> + The money take:—pursuit you can evade; + </p> + <p> + As I request, proceed; then trust to me:— + </p> + <p> + You naught shall want wherever you may be. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TO seek fair Argia instantly he went; + </p> + <p> + She, by her dog, was warned of his intent. + </p> + <p> + How these can warn? if asked, I shall reply, + </p> + <p> + They grumble, bark, complain, or fawn, or sigh; + </p> + <p> + Pull petticoat or gown, and snarl at all, + </p> + <p> + Who happen in their way just then to fall; + </p> + <p> + But few so dull as not to comprehend; + </p> + <p> + Howe'er, this fav'rite whispered to his friend, + </p> + <p> + The dangers that awaited her around; + </p> + <p> + But go, said he, protection you have found; + </p> + <p> + Confide in me:—I'll ev'ry ill prevent, + </p> + <p> + For which the rascal hither has been sent. + </p> + <p> + As on they moved, a wood was in the way, + </p> + <p> + Where robbers often waited for their prey; + </p> + <p> + The villain whom the husband had employed, + </p> + <p> + Sent forward those whose company annoyed, + </p> + <p> + And would prevent his execrable plan; + </p> + <p> + The last of horrid crimes.—disgrace to man! + </p> + <p> + No sooner had the wretch his orders told, + </p> + <p> + But Argia vanished—none could her behold; + </p> + <p> + The beauteous belle was quickly lost to view: + </p> + <p> + A cloud, the fairy Manto o'er her threw. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS circumstance astonished much the wretch, + </p> + <p> + Who ran to give our doating spouse a sketch + </p> + <p> + Of what had passed so strange upon the way; + </p> + <p> + Old Anselm thither went without delay, + </p> + <p> + When, marvellous to think! with great surprise, + </p> + <p> + He saw a palace of extensive size, + </p> + <p> + Erected where, an hour or two before, + </p> + <p> + A hovel was not seen, nor e'en a door. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE husband stood aghast!—admired the place, + </p> + <p> + Not built for man, e'en gods 'twould not disgrace. + </p> + <p> + The rooms were gilt; the decorations fine; + </p> + <p> + The gardens and the pleasure-grounds divine; + </p> + <p> + Such rich magnificence was never seen; + </p> + <p> + Superb the whole, a charming blessed demesne. + </p> + <p> + The entrance ev'ry way was open found; + </p> + <p> + But not a person could be viewed around, + </p> + <p> + Except a negro, hideous to behold, + </p> + <p> + Who much resembled AEsop, famed of old. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR judge the negro for a porter took, + </p> + <p> + Who was the house to clean and overlook; + </p> + <p> + And taking him for such, the black addressed, + </p> + <p> + With full belief the title was the best, + </p> + <p> + And that he greatly honoured him, 'twas plain + </p> + <p> + (Of ev'ry colour men are proud and vain:) + </p> + <p> + Said he, my friend, what god this palace owns? + </p> + <p> + Too much it seems for those of earthly thrones; + </p> + <p> + No king, of consequence enough could be; + </p> + <p> + The palace, cried the black, belongs to me. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE judge was instantly upon his knees, + </p> + <p> + The negro's pardon asked, and sought to please; + </p> + <p> + I trust, said he, my lord, you'll overlook + </p> + <p> + The fault I made: my ignorance mistook. + </p> + <p> + The universe has not so nice a spot; + </p> + <p> + The world so beautiful a palace got! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + DOST wish me, said the black, the house to give, + </p> + <p> + For thee and thine therein at ease to live? + </p> + <p> + On one condition thou shalt have the place + </p> + <p> + For thee I seriously intend the grace, + </p> + <p> + If thou 'lt on me a day or two attend, + </p> + <p> + As page of honour:—dost thou comprehend? + </p> + <p> + The custom know'st thou—better I'll expound; + </p> + <p> + A cup-bearer with Jupiter is found, + </p> + <p> + Thou'st heard no doubt. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0248m.jpg" alt="0248m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0248.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + ANSELM <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + What, Ganymede? <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NEGRO <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + The same; + </p> + <p> + And I'm that Jupiter of mighty fame; + </p> + <p> + The chief supreme who rules above the skies; + </p> + <p> + Be thou the lad with fascinating eyes, + </p> + <p> + Though not so handsome, nor in truth so young. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ANSELM <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + You jest, my lord; to youth I don't belong; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis very clear;—my judge's dress—my age! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NEGRO <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + I jest? thou dream'st. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ANSELM <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + My lord? <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NEGRO <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + You won't engage? + </p> + <p> + Just as you will:—'tis all the same you'll find. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ANSELM <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + My lord! . . . The learned judge himself resigned, + </p> + <p> + The black's mysterious wishes to obey;— + </p> + <p> + Alas! curst presents, how they always weigh! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A PAGE the magistrate was quickly seen, + </p> + <p> + In dress, in look, in age, in air, in mien; + </p> + <p> + His hat became a cap; his beard alone + </p> + <p> + Remained unchanged; the rest had wholly flown. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THUS metamorphosed to a pretty boy, + </p> + <p> + The judge proceeded in the black's employ. + </p> + <p> + Within a corner hidden, Argia lay, + </p> + <p> + And heard what Anselm had been led to say. + </p> + <p> + The Moor howe'er was Manto, most renowned, + </p> + <p> + Transformed, as oft the fairy we have found; + </p> + <p> + She built the charming palace by her art,— + </p> + <p> + Now youthful features would to age impart. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT length, as Anselm through a passage came, + </p> + <p> + He suddenly beheld his beauteous dame. + </p> + <p> + What! learned Anselm do I see, said she, + </p> + <p> + In this disguise?—It surely cannot be; + </p> + <p> + My eyes deceive me:—Anselm, grave and wise; + </p> + <p> + Give such a lesson? I am all surprise. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + 'TIS doubtless he: oh, oh! our bald-pate sire; + </p> + <p> + Ambassador and judge, we must admire, + </p> + <p> + To see your honour thus in masquerade:— + </p> + <p> + At your age, truly, suffer to be made + </p> + <p> + A—modesty denies my tongue its powr's + </p> + <p> + What!—you condemn to death for freaks like ours? + </p> + <p> + You, whom I've found *** you understand—for shame + </p> + <p> + Your crimes are such as all must blush to name. + </p> + <p> + Though I may have a negro for gallant, + </p> + <p> + And erred when Atis for me seemed to pant, + </p> + <p> + His merit and the black's superior rank, + </p> + <p> + Must lessen, if not quite excuse my prank. + </p> + <p> + Howe'er, old boy, you presently shall see, + </p> + <p> + If any belle solicited should be, + </p> + <p> + To grant indulgencies, with presents sweet, + </p> + <p> + She will not straight capitulation beat; + </p> + <p> + At least, if they be such as I have viewed:— + </p> + <p> + Moor, change to dog; immediately ensued + </p> + <p> + The metamorphose that the fair required, + </p> + <p> + The black'moor was again a dog admired. + </p> + <p> + Dance, fav'rite; instantly he skipped and played; + </p> + <p> + And to the judge his pretty paw conveyed. + </p> + <p> + Spaniel, scatter gold; presently there fell + </p> + <p> + Large sums of money, as the sound could tell. + </p> + <p> + Such strong temptation who can e'er evade? + </p> + <p> + The dog a present to your wife was made. + </p> + <p> + Then show me, if you can, upon the earth, + </p> + <p> + A queen, a princess, of the highest birth, + </p> + <p> + Who would not virtue presently concede, + </p> + <p> + If such excuses for it she could plead; + </p> + <p> + Particularly if the giver proved + </p> + <p> + A handsome lad that elegantly moved. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + I, TRULY, for the spaniel was exchanged; + </p> + <p> + What you'd too much of, freely I arranged, + </p> + <p> + To grant away, this jewel to obtain + </p> + <p> + My value 's nothing great, you think, 'tis plain; + </p> + <p> + And, surely, you'd have thought me very wrong, + </p> + <p> + When such a prize I met, to haggle long. + </p> + <p> + 'Twas he this palace raised; but I have done; + </p> + <p> + Remember, since you've yet a course to run, + </p> + <p> + Take care again how you command my death; + </p> + <p> + In spite of your designs I draw my breath. + </p> + <p> + Though none but Atis with me had success, + </p> + <p> + I now desire, he may Lucretia bless, + </p> + <p> + And wish her to surrender up her charms, + </p> + <p> + (Just like myself) to his extended arms. + </p> + <p> + If you approve, our peace at once is made: + </p> + <p> + If not—while I've this dog I'm not afraid, + </p> + <p> + But you defy: I dread not swords nor bowl; + </p> + <p> + The little dog can warn me of the whole; + </p> + <p> + The jealous he confounds; be that no more; + </p> + <p> + Such folly hence determine to give o'er. + </p> + <p> + If you, to put restraints on women choose, + </p> + <p> + You'll sooner far their fond affections lose. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE whole our judge conceded;—could he less? + </p> + <p> + The secret of his recent change of dress + </p> + <p> + Was promised to be kept: and that unknown, + </p> + <p> + E'en cuckoldom again might there have flown. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR couple mutual compensation made, + </p> + <p> + Then bade adieu to hill, and dale, and glade. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SOME critick asks the handsome palace' fate; + </p> + <p> + I answer:—that, my friend, I shan't relate; + </p> + <p> + It disappeared, no matter how nor when. + </p> + <p> + Why put such questions?—strict is not my pen. + </p> + <p> + The little dog, pray what of that became? + </p> + <p> + To serve the lover was his constant aim. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AND how was that?—You're troublesome my friend: + </p> + <p> + The dog perhaps would more assistance lend; + </p> + <p> + On new intrigues his master might be bent; + </p> + <p> + With single conquest who was e'er content? <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE fav'rite spaniel oft was missing found; + </p> + <p> + But when the little rogue had gone his round, + </p> + <p> + He'd then return, as if from work relieved, + </p> + <p> + To her who first his services received. + </p> + <p> + His fondness into fervent friendship grew; + </p> + <p> + As such gay Atis visited anew; + </p> + <p> + He often came, but Argia was sincere, + </p> + <p> + And firmly to her vow would now adhere: + </p> + <p> + Old Anselm too, had sworn, by heav'n above; + </p> + <p> + No more to be suspicious of his love; + </p> + <p> + And, if he ever page became again, + </p> + <p> + To suffer punishment's severest pain. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Eel_Pie" id="Eel_Pie">THE EEL PIE</a> + </h2> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0254m.jpg" alt="0254m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0254.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HOWEVER exquisite we BEAUTY find, + </p> + <p> + It satiates sense, and palls upon the mind: + </p> + <p> + Brown bread as well as white must be for me; + </p> + <p> + My motto ever is—VARIETY. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THAT brisk brunette, with languid, sleepy eye, + </p> + <p> + Delights my fancy; Can you tell me why? + </p> + <p> + The reason 's plain enough:—she 's something new. + </p> + <p> + The other mistress, long within my view, + </p> + <p> + Though lily fair, with seraph features blessed, + </p> + <p> + No more emotion raises in my breast; + </p> + <p> + Her heart assents, while mine reluctant proves; + </p> + <p> + Whence this diversity that in us moves? + </p> + <p> + From hence it rises, to be plain and free, + </p> + <p> + My motto ever is—VARIETY. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE same in other words, I've often said; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis right, at times, disguise with care to spread. + </p> + <p> + The maxim's good, and with it I agree: + </p> + <p> + My motto ever is—VARIETY. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A CERTAIN spouse the same devise had got, + </p> + <p> + Whose wife by all was thought a handsome lot. + </p> + <p> + His love, howe'er, was over very soon; + </p> + <p> + It lasted only through the honeymoon; + </p> + <p> + Possession had his passion quite destroyed; + </p> + <p> + In Hymen's bands too oft the lover 's cloyed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ONE, 'mong his valets, had a pretty wife; + </p> + <p> + The master was himself quite full of life, + </p> + <p> + And soon the charmer to his wishes drew, + </p> + <p> + With which the husband discontented grew, + </p> + <p> + And having caught them in the very fact, + </p> + <p> + He rang his mate the changes for the act; + </p> + <p> + Sad names he called her, howsoever just, + </p> + <p> + A silly blockhead! thus to raise a dust, + </p> + <p> + For what, in ev'ry town 's so common found; + </p> + <p> + May we worse fortune never meet around! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0258m.jpg" alt="0258m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0258.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + HE made the paramour a grave harangue + </p> + <p> + Don't others give, said he, the poignant pang; + </p> + <p> + But ev'ry one allow to keep his own, + </p> + <p> + As God and reason oft to man have shown, + </p> + <p> + And recommended fully to observe; + </p> + <p> + You from it surely have not cause to swerve; + </p> + <p> + You cannot plead that you for beauty pine + </p> + <p> + You've one at home who far surpasses mine; + </p> + <p> + No longer give yourself such trouble, pray: + </p> + <p> + You, to my help-mate, too much honour pay; + </p> + <p> + Such marked attentions she can ne'er require + </p> + <p> + Let each of us, alone his own admire. + </p> + <p> + To others' WELLs you never ought to go, + </p> + <p> + While your's with sweets is found to overflow; + </p> + <p> + I willingly appeal to connoisseurs; + </p> + <p> + If heav'n had blessed me with such bliss as your's, + </p> + <p> + That when I please, your lady I could take, + </p> + <p> + I would not for a queen such charms forsake. + </p> + <p> + But since we can't prevent what now is known, + </p> + <p> + I wish, good sir, contented with your own, + </p> + <p> + (And 'tis, I hope, without offence I speak,) + </p> + <p> + You'll favours from my wife no longer seek. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE master, neither no nor yes replied, + </p> + <p> + But orders gave, his man they should provide; + </p> + <p> + For dinner ev'ry day, what pleased his taste, + </p> + <p> + A pie of eels, which near him should be placed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HIS appetite at first was wond'rous great; + </p> + <p> + Again, the second time, as much he ate; + </p> + <p> + But when the third appeared, he felt disgust, + </p> + <p> + And not another morsel down could thrust. + </p> + <p> + The valet fain would try a diff'rent dish; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas not allowed;—you've got, said they, your wish; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis pie alone; you like it best you know, + </p> + <p> + And no objection you must dare to show. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + I'M surfeited, cried he, 'tis far too much: + </p> + <p> + Pie ev'ry day! and nothing else to touch! + </p> + <p> + Not e'en a roasted eel, or stewed, or fried! + </p> + <p> + Dry bread I'd rather you'd for me provide. + </p> + <p> + Of your's allow me some at any rate, + </p> + <p> + Pies, (devil take them!) thoroughly I hate; + </p> + <p> + They'll follow me to Paradise I fear, + </p> + <p> + Or further yet;—Heav'n keep me from such cheer! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THEIR noisy mirth the master thither drew, + </p> + <p> + Who much desired the frolick to pursue; + </p> + <p> + My friend, said he, I greatly feel surprise, + </p> + <p> + That you so soon are weary grown of pies; + </p> + <p> + Have I not heard you frequently declare, + </p> + <p> + Eel-pie 's of all, the most delicious fare? + </p> + <p> + Quite fickle, certainly, must be your taste; + </p> + <p> + Can any thing in me so strange be traced? + </p> + <p> + When I exchange a food which you admire; + </p> + <p> + You blame and say, I never ought to tire; + </p> + <p> + You do the very same; in truth, my friend, + </p> + <p> + No mark of folly 'tis, you may depend, + </p> + <p> + In lord or squire, or citizen or clown, + </p> + <p> + To change the bread that's white for bit of brown: + </p> + <p> + With more experience, you'll with me agree,— + </p> + <p> + My motto ever is—VARIETY. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN thus the master had himself expressed, + </p> + <p> + The valet presently was less distressed; + </p> + <p> + Some arguments, howe'er, at first he used; + </p> + <p> + For, after all—are fully we excused, + </p> + <p> + When we our pleasure solely have in view; + </p> + <p> + Without regarding what's to others due? + </p> + <p> + I relish change; well, take it; but 'tis best, + </p> + <p> + To gain the belles with love of gold possessed; + </p> + <p> + And that appears to me the proper plan; + </p> + <p> + In truth, our lover very soon began + </p> + <p> + To practise this advice;—his voice and way + </p> + <p> + Could angel-sweetness instantly convey. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HIS words were always gilt; (impressive tongue!) + </p> + <p> + To gilded words will sure success belong. + </p> + <p> + In soft amours they're ev'ry thing 'tis plain + </p> + <p> + The maxim 's certain, and our aim will gain; + </p> + <p> + My meaning doubtless easily is seen; + </p> + <p> + A hundred times repeated this has been + </p> + <p> + Th' impression should be made so very deep, + </p> + <p> + That I thereon can never silence keep; + </p> + <p> + And this the constant burden of my song— + </p> + <p> + To gilded words will sure success belong. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THEY easily persuade the beauteous dame; + </p> + <p> + Her dog, her maid, duenna, all the same; + </p> + <p> + The husband sometimes too, and him we've shown + </p> + <p> + 'Twas necessary here to gain alone; + </p> + <p> + By golden eloquence his soul was lulled; + </p> + <p> + Although from ancient orators not culled: + </p> + <p> + Their books retained have nothing of the kind; + </p> + <p> + Our jealous spouse indulgent grew we find. + </p> + <p> + He followed e'en, 'tis said, the other's plan— + </p> + <p> + And, thence his dishes to exchange began. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE master and his fav'rite's freaks around; + </p> + <p> + Continually the table-talk were found; + </p> + <p> + He always thought the newest face the best: + </p> + <p> + Where'er he could, each beauty he caressed; + </p> + <p> + The wife, the widow, daughter, servant-maid, + </p> + <p> + The nymph of field or town:—with all he played; + </p> + <p> + And, while he breathed, the same would always be; + </p> + <p> + His motto ever was—VARIETY. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Magnificent" id="Magnificent"></a>THE MAGNIFICENT + </h2> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0264m.jpg" alt="0264m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0264.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SOME wit, handsome form and gen'rous mind; + </p> + <p> + A triple engine prove in love we find; + </p> + <p> + By these the strongest fortresses are gained + </p> + <p> + E'en rocks 'gainst such can never be sustained. + </p> + <p> + If you've some talents, with a pleasing face, + </p> + <p> + Your purse-strings open free, and you've the place. + </p> + <p> + At times, no doubt, without these things, success + </p> + <p> + Attends the gay gallant, we must confess; + </p> + <p> + But then, good sense should o'er his actions rule; + </p> + <p> + At all events, he must not be a fool. + </p> + <p> + The stingy, women ever will detest; + </p> + <p> + Words puppies want;—the lib'ral are the best. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A Florentine, MAGNIFICENT by name, + </p> + <p> + Was what we've just described, in fact and fame; + </p> + <p> + The title was bestowed upon the knight, + </p> + <p> + For noble deeds performed by him in fight. + </p> + <p> + The honour ev'ry way he well deserved; + </p> + <p> + His upright conduct (whence he never swerved,) + </p> + <p> + Expensive equipage, and presents made, + </p> + <p> + Proclaimed him all around what we've pourtrayed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WITH handsome person and a pleasing mien, + </p> + <p> + Gallant, a polished air, and soul serene; + </p> + <p> + A certain fair of noble birth he sought, + </p> + <p> + Whose conquest, doubtless, brilliant would be thought; + </p> + <p> + Which in our lover doubly raised desire; + </p> + <p> + Renown and pleasure lent his bosom fire. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE jealous husband of the beauteous fair + </p> + <p> + Was Aldobrandin, whose suspicious care + </p> + <p> + Resembled more, what frequently is shown + </p> + <p> + For fav'rites mistresses, than wives alone. + </p> + <p> + He watched her every step with all his eyes; + </p> + <p> + A hundred thousand scarcely would suffice; + </p> + <p> + Indeed, quite useless Cupid these can make; + </p> + <p> + And Argus oft is subject to mistake: + </p> + <p> + Repeatedly they're duped, although our wight, + </p> + <p> + (Who fancied he in ev'ry thing was right,) + </p> + <p> + Himself so perfectly secure believed, + </p> + <p> + By gay gallants he ne'er could be deceived. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TO suitors, howsoe'er, he was not blind; + </p> + <p> + To covet presents, greatly he inclined. + </p> + <p> + The lover yet had no occasion found, + </p> + <p> + To drop a word to charms so much renowned; + </p> + <p> + He thought his passion was not even seen; + </p> + <p> + And if it had, would things have better been? + </p> + <p> + What would have followed? what had been the end? + </p> + <p> + The reader needs no hint to comprehend. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BUT to return to our forlorn gallant, + </p> + <p> + Whose bosom for the lady's 'gan to pant; + </p> + <p> + He, to his doctor, not a word had said; + </p> + <p> + Now here, now there, he tried to pop his head. + </p> + <p> + But neither door nor window could he find, + </p> + <p> + Where he might glimpse the object of his mind, + </p> + <p> + Or even hear her voice, or sound her name; + </p> + <p> + No fortress had he ever found the same; + </p> + <p> + Yet still to conquer he was quite resolved, + </p> + <p> + And oft the manner in his mind revolved. + </p> + <p> + This plan at length he thought would best succeed, + </p> + <p> + To execute it doubtless he had need + </p> + <p> + Of ev'ry wily art he could devise, + </p> + <p> + Surrounded as he was by eagle-eyes. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + I THINK the reader I've already told, + </p> + <p> + Our husband loved rich presents to behold; + </p> + <p> + Though none he made, yet all he would receive; + </p> + <p> + Whate'er was offered he would never leave. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + MAGNIFICENT a handsome horse had got, + </p> + <p> + It ambled well, or cantered, or would trot; + </p> + <p> + He greatly valued it, and for its pace, + </p> + <p> + 'Twas called the Pad; it stept with wond'rous grace: + </p> + <p> + By Aldobrandin it was highly praised; + </p> + <p> + Enough was this: the knight's fond hopes were raised; + </p> + <p> + Who offered to exchange, but t'other thought, + </p> + <p> + He in a barter might perhaps be caught. + </p> + <p> + 'Tis not, said he, that I the horse refuse; + </p> + <p> + But I, in trucking, never fail to lose. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0270m.jpg" alt="0270m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0270.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + ON this, Magnificent, who saw his aim; + </p> + <p> + Replied, well, well, a better scheme we'll frame; + </p> + <p> + No changing we'll allow, but you'll permit, + </p> + <p> + That for the horse, I with your lady sit, + </p> + <p> + You present all the while, 'tis what I want; + </p> + <p> + I'm curious, I confess, and fort it pant. + </p> + <p> + Besides, your friends assuredly should know + </p> + <p> + What mind, what sentiments may from her flow. + </p> + <p> + Just fifteen minutes, I no more desire: + </p> + <p> + What! cried the other, you my wife require? + </p> + <p> + No, no, pray keep your horse, that won't be right. + </p> + <p> + But you'll be present, said the courteous knight. + </p> + <p> + And what of that? rejoined the wily spouse. + </p> + <p> + Why, cried Magnificent, then naught should rouse + </p> + <p> + Your fears or cares, for how can ill arise, + </p> + <p> + While watched by you, possessed of eagle-eyes? <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE husband 'gan to turn it in his mind; + </p> + <p> + Thought he, if present, what can be designed? + </p> + <p> + The plan is such as dissipates my fears; + </p> + <p> + The offer advantageous too appears; + </p> + <p> + He's surely mad; I can't conceive his aim; + </p> + <p> + But, to secure myself and wife from shame; + </p> + <p> + Without his knowledge, I'll forbid the fair + </p> + <p> + Her lips to open, and for this prepare. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + COME, cried old Aldobrandin, I'll consent: + </p> + <p> + But, said the other, recollect 'tis meant, + </p> + <p> + So distant from us, all the while you stay, + </p> + <p> + That not a word you hear of what I say. + </p> + <p> + Agreed, rejoined the husband:—let's begin; + </p> + <p> + Away he flew, and brought the lady in. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN our gallant the charming belle perceived; + </p> + <p> + Elysium seemed around, he half believed. + </p> + <p> + The salutations o'er, they went and sat + </p> + <p> + Together in a corner, where their chat + </p> + <p> + Could not be heard, if they to talk inclined; + </p> + <p> + Our brisk gallant no long harangues designed, + </p> + <p> + But to the point advanced without delay; + </p> + <p> + Cried he, I've neither time nor place to say + </p> + <p> + What I could wish, and useless 'twere to seek + </p> + <p> + Expressions that but indirectly speak + </p> + <p> + The sentiments which animate the soul; + </p> + <p> + In terms direct, 'tis better state the whole. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THUS circumstanced, fair lady, let me, pray; + </p> + <p> + To you at once, my adoration pay; + </p> + <p> + No words my admiration can express; + </p> + <p> + Your charms enslave my senses, I confess; + </p> + <p> + Can you suppose to answer would be wrong? + </p> + <p> + Too much good sense to you should now belong; + </p> + <p> + Had I the leisure, I'd in form disclose + </p> + <p> + The tender flame with which my bosom glows; + </p> + <p> + Each horrid torment; but by Fate denied + </p> + <p> + Blessed opportunities, let me not hide, + </p> + <p> + While moments offer, what pervades my heart, + </p> + <p> + And openly avow the burning smart + </p> + <p> + Few minutes I have got to travel o'er + </p> + <p> + What gen'rally requires six months or more. + </p> + <p> + Cold is that lover who will not pursue, + </p> + <p> + With ev'ry ardour, beauty, when in view. + </p> + <p> + But why this silence?—not a word you say! + </p> + <p> + You surely will not send me thus away! + </p> + <p> + That heav'n, an angel made you, none deny; + </p> + <p> + But still, to what is asked you should reply. + </p> + <p> + Your husband this contrived I plainly see, + </p> + <p> + Who fancies that replies were not to be, + </p> + <p> + Since in our bargain they were never named; + </p> + <p> + For shuffling conduct he was ever famed; + </p> + <p> + But I'll come round him, spite of all his art; + </p> + <p> + I can reply for you, and from the heart, + </p> + <p> + Since I can read your wishes in your eyes; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis thus to say—Good, sir, I would advise + </p> + <p> + That you regard me, not as marble cold; + </p> + <p> + Your various tournaments and actions bold, + </p> + <p> + Your serenades, and gen'ral conduct prove, + </p> + <p> + What tender sentiments your bosom move. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + YOUR fond affection constantly I praised, + </p> + <p> + And quickly felt a flame within me raised; + </p> + <p> + Yet what avails?—Oh, that I'll soon disclose; + </p> + <p> + Since we agree, allow me to propose, + </p> + <p> + Our mutual wishes we enjoy to-night; + </p> + <p> + And turn to ridicule that jealous Wight; + </p> + <p> + In short, reward him for his wily fear, + </p> + <p> + In watching us so very closely here. + </p> + <p> + Your garden will be quite the thing, I guess; + </p> + <p> + Go thither, pray, and never fear success; + </p> + <p> + Depend upon it, soon his country seat + </p> + <p> + Your spouse will visit:—then the hunks we'll cheat. + </p> + <p> + When plunged in sleep the grave duennas lie, + </p> + <p> + Arise, furred gown put on, and quickly fly; + </p> + <p> + With careful steps you'll to the garden haste; + </p> + <p> + I've got a ladder ready to be placed + </p> + <p> + Against the wall which joins your neighbour's square: + </p> + <p> + I've his permission thither to repair; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis better than the street:—fear naught my dove.— + </p> + <p> + Ah! dear Magnificent, my fondest love; + </p> + <p> + As you desire, I'll readily proceed; + </p> + <p> + My heart is your's: we fully are agreed. + </p> + <p> + 'T's you who speaks, and, would that in my arms + </p> + <p> + Permission I had got to clasp your charms! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + MAGNIFICENT (for her he now replied,) + </p> + <p> + This flame you'll soon no reason have to hide + </p> + <p> + Through dread or fear of my old jealous fool, + </p> + <p> + Who wisely fancies he can woman rule. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE lover, feigning rare, the lady left, + </p> + <p> + And grumbling much, as if of hope bereft, + </p> + <p> + Addressed the husband thus: you're vastly kind; + </p> + <p> + As well with no-one converse I might find; + </p> + <p> + If horses you so easily procure, + </p> + <p> + You Fortune's frowns may very well endure. + </p> + <p> + Mine neighs, at least, but this fair image seems, + </p> + <p> + Mere pretty fish; I've satisfied my schemes; + </p> + <p> + What now of precious minutes may remain, + </p> + <p> + If any one desire my chance to gain, + </p> + <p> + A bargain he shall have:—most cheap the prize; + </p> + <p> + The husband laughed till tears bedewed his eyes. + </p> + <p> + Said he, these youths have always in their head + </p> + <p> + Some wond'rous fancies; follies round them spread. + </p> + <p> + Friend, from pursuit you much too soon retire: + </p> + <p> + With time we oft obtain our fond desire. + </p> + <p> + But I shall always keep a watchful eye; + </p> + <p> + Some knowing tricks methinks I yet can spy; + </p> + <p> + Howe'er, the horse must now be clearly mine, + </p> + <p> + And you'll the pad of course to me resign; + </p> + <p> + To you no more expense; and from to-day, + </p> + <p> + Be not displeased to see me on it, pray; + </p> + <p> + At ease I'll ride my country house to view;— + </p> + <p> + That very night he to the mansion flew, + </p> + <p> + And our good folks immediately repaired, + </p> + <p> + Where gay Magnificent no pains had spared + </p> + <p> + To get access; what passed we won't detail; + </p> + <p> + Soft scenes, you'll doubtless guess, should there prevail. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE dame was lively, beautiful, and young; + </p> + <p> + The lover handsome, finely formed, and strong; + </p> + <p> + Alike enchanted with each other's charms, + </p> + <p> + Three meetings were contrived without alarms; + </p> + <p> + A fair so captivating to possess, + </p> + <p> + What mortal could be satisfied with less? + </p> + <p> + In golden dreams the sage duennas slept; + </p> + <p> + A female sentinel to watch was kept. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A SUMMER-HOUSE was at the garden end, + </p> + <p> + Which to the pair much ease was found to lend; + </p> + <p> + Old Aldobrandin, when he built the same, + </p> + <p> + Ne'er fancied LOVE, would in it freak and game. + </p> + <p> + In cuckoldom he took his full degrees; + </p> + <p> + The horse he daily mounted at his ease, + </p> + <p> + And so delighted with his bargain seemed, + </p> + <p> + Three days, to prove it, requisite he deemed. + </p> + <p> + The country house received him ev'ry night; + </p> + <p> + At home he never dreamed but all was right. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHAT numbers round, whom Fortune favours less; + </p> + <p> + Have got a wife, but not a horse possess; + </p> + <p> + And, what yet still more wond'rous may appear, + </p> + <p> + Know ey'ry thing that passes with their dear. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Ephesian_Matron" id="Ephesian_Matron"></a>THE EPHESIAN MATRON + </h2> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0277m.jpg" alt="0277m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0277.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + [<i>NOTE: See Chapters 111 and 112 from The Satyricon by </i> + </p> + <p> + Petronius Arbiter. DW] <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IF there's a tale more common than the rest, + </p> + <p> + The one I mean to give is such confessed. + </p> + <p> + Why choose it then? you ask; at whose desire? + </p> + <p> + Hast not enough already tuned thy lyre? + </p> + <p> + What favour can thy MATRON now expect, + </p> + <p> + Since novelty thou clearly dost neglect? + </p> + <p> + Besides, thou'lt doubtless raise the critick's rage. + </p> + <p> + See if it looks more modern in my page. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT Ephesus, in former times, once shone, + </p> + <p> + A fair, whose charms would dignify a throne; + </p> + <p> + And, if to publick rumour credit 's due, + </p> + <p> + Celestial bliss her husband with her knew. + </p> + <p> + Naught else was talked of but her beauteous face, + </p> + <p> + And chastity that adds the highest grace; + </p> + <p> + From ev'ry quarter numbers flocked to see + </p> + <p> + This belle, regarded as from errors free. + </p> + <p> + The honour of her sex, and country too; + </p> + <p> + As such, old mothers held her up to view, + </p> + <p> + And wished their offspring's wives like her to act: + </p> + <p> + The sons desired the very same in fact; + </p> + <p> + From her, beyond a doubt, our PRUDES descend, + </p> + <p> + An ancient, celebrated house, depend. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE spouse adored his beauteous charming wife: + </p> + <p> + But soon, alas! he lost his precious life; + </p> + <p> + 'Twere useless on particulars to dwell: + </p> + <p> + His testament, indeed, provided well + </p> + <p> + For her he loved on earth to fond excess, + </p> + <p> + Which, 'yond a doubt, would have relieved distress; + </p> + <p> + Could gold a cherished husband's loss repair, + </p> + <p> + That filled her soul with black corroding care. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A WIDOW, howsoever, oft appears + </p> + <p> + Distracted 'mid incessant floods of tears, + </p> + <p> + Who thoroughly her int'rest recollects, + </p> + <p> + And, spite of sobs, her property inspects. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR Matron's cries were loudly heard around, + </p> + <p> + And feeling bosoms shuddered at the sound; + </p> + <p> + Though, we, on these occasions, truly know, + </p> + <p> + The plaint is always greater than the woe. + </p> + <p> + Some ostentation ever is with grief + </p> + <p> + Those who weep most the soonest gain relief. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + EACH friend endeavoured to console the fair; + </p> + <p> + Of sorrow, she'd already had her share: + </p> + <p> + 'Twas wrong herself so fully to resign;— + </p> + <p> + Such pious preachings only more incline + </p> + <p> + The soul to anguish 'mid distractions dire: + </p> + <p> + Extremes in ev'ry thing will soonest tire. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT length, resolved to shun the glorious light, + </p> + <p> + Since her dear spouse no longer had the sight, + </p> + <p> + O'erwhelmed with grief she sought Death's dreary cell, + </p> + <p> + Her love to follow, and with him to dwell. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A SLAVE, through pity, with the widow went; + </p> + <p> + To live or die with her she was content; + </p> + <p> + To die, howe'er, she never could intend: + </p> + <p> + No doubt she only thought about her friend, + </p> + <p> + The mistress whom she never wished to quit, + </p> + <p> + Since from her birth with her she used to sit. + </p> + <p> + They loved each other with a friendship true: + </p> + <p> + From early years it daily stronger grew; + </p> + <p> + Look through the universe you'll scarcely find, + </p> + <p> + So great a likeness, both in heart and mind. + </p> + <p> + The slave, more clever than the lady fair, + </p> + <p> + At first her mistress left to wild despair; + </p> + <p> + She then essayed to soothe each torment dire; + </p> + <p> + But reason 's fruitless, with a soul on fire. + </p> + <p> + No consolation would the belle receive, + </p> + <p> + For one no more, she constantly would grieve, + </p> + <p> + And sought to follow him to regions blessed:— + </p> + <p> + The sword had shortest proved, if not the best. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BUT still the lady anxious was to view, + </p> + <p> + Again those precious relicks, and pursue, + </p> + <p> + E'en in the tomb what yet her soul held dear + </p> + <p> + No aliment she took her mind to cheer; + </p> + <p> + The gate of famine was the one she chose, + </p> + <p> + By which to leave this nether world of woes. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A DAY she passed; another day the same; + </p> + <p> + Her only sustenance, sobs, sighs, and flame + </p> + <p> + Still unappeased; she murmur'd 'gainst her fate; + </p> + <p> + But nothing could her direful woes abate. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ANOTHER corpse a residence had got, + </p> + <p> + A trifling distance from the gloomy spot; + </p> + <p> + But very diff'rent, since, by way of tomb, + </p> + <p> + Enchained on gibbet was the latter's doom; + </p> + <p> + To frighten robbers was the form designed, + </p> + <p> + And show the punishment that rogues should find. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A SOLDIER, as a sentinel was set, + </p> + <p> + To guard the gallows, who good payment met; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas ruled, howe'er, if robbers, parents, friends, + </p> + <p> + The body carried off, to make amends, + </p> + <p> + The sentinel at once should take its place + </p> + <p> + Severity too great for such a case; + </p> + <p> + But publick safety fully to maintain, + </p> + <p> + 'Twas right the sentry pardon should not gain. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHILE moving round his post, he saw at night + </p> + <p> + Shine, cross the tomb, a strange, unusual light, + </p> + <p> + Which thither drew him, curious to unfold + </p> + <p> + What, through the chinks, his eyesight could behold. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR wight soon heard the lady's cries distressed, + </p> + <p> + On which he entered, and with ardour pressed, + </p> + <p> + The cause of such excessive grief to know, + </p> + <p> + And if 'twas in his pow'r to ease her woe. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + DISSOLVED in tears, and quite o'ercome with care; + </p> + <p> + She scarcely noticed that a man was there. + </p> + <p> + The corpse, howe'er, too plainly told her pain, + </p> + <p> + And fully seemed the myst'ry to explain. + </p> + <p> + We've sworn, exclaimed the slave, what's 'yond belief, + </p> + <p> + That here we'll die of famine and of grief. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0283m.jpg" alt="0283m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0283.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + THOUGH eloquence was not the soldier's art, + </p> + <p> + He both convinced 'twas wrong with life to part: + </p> + <p> + The dame was great attention led to pay, + </p> + <p> + To what the son of Mars inclined to say, + </p> + <p> + Which seemed to soften her severe distress: + </p> + <p> + With time each poignant smart is rendered less. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IF, said the soldier, you have made a vow, + </p> + <p> + That you, some food to take will not allow; + </p> + <p> + Yet, looking on while I my supper eat, + </p> + <p> + Will not prolong your lives, nor oaths defeat. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HIS open manner much was formed to please; + </p> + <p> + The lady and her maid grew more at ease, + </p> + <p> + Which made the gen'rous sentinel conclude, + </p> + <p> + To bring his meat they would not fancy rude. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS done, the slave no longer was inclined + </p> + <p> + To follow Death, as soon she changed her mind. + </p> + <p> + Said she, good madam, pleasing thoughts I've got; + </p> + <p> + Don't you believe that, if you live or not, + </p> + <p> + 'Tis to your husband ev'ry whit the same? + </p> + <p> + Had you gone first, would he have had the name + </p> + <p> + Of following to the grave as you design? + </p> + <p> + No, no, he'd to another course incline. + </p> + <p> + Long years of comfort we may clearly crave; + </p> + <p> + At twenty years it's surely wrong to brave + </p> + <p> + Both death and famine in a gloomy tomb + </p> + <p> + There's time enough to think of such a doom. + </p> + <p> + At best, too soon we die; do let us wait; + </p> + <p> + Here's nothing now at least to haste our fate. + </p> + <p> + In truth, I wish to see a good old age: + </p> + <p> + To bury charms like your's, would that be sage? + </p> + <p> + Of what advantage, I should wish to know, + </p> + <p> + To carry beauty to the shades below? + </p> + <p> + Those heavenly features make my bosom sigh, + </p> + <p> + To think from earthly praise they mean to fly. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS flatt'ry roused the beauteous widowed fair; + </p> + <p> + The god of soft persuasion soon was there, + </p> + <p> + And from his quiver in a moment drew + </p> + <p> + Two arrows keen, which from his bow-string flew; + </p> + <p> + With one he pierced the soldier to the heart, + </p> + <p> + The lady slightly felt the other dart. + </p> + <p> + Her youth and beauty, spite of tears, appeared, + </p> + <p> + And men of taste such charms had long revered; + </p> + <p> + A mind of tender feeling might, through life. + </p> + <p> + Have loved her—even though she were a wife. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE sentinel was smitten with her charms; + </p> + <p> + Grief, pity, sighs, belong to Cupid's arms; + </p> + <p> + When bosoms heave and eyes are drowned in tears, + </p> + <p> + Then beauty oft with conq'ring grace appears. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BEHOLD our widow list'ning to his praise, + </p> + <p> + Incipient fuel Cupid's flame to raise; + </p> + <p> + Behold her, even glad to view the wight, + </p> + <p> + Whose well tim'd flatt'ry filled her with delight <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT length, to eat he on the fair prevailed, + </p> + <p> + And pleased her better than the dead bewailed. + </p> + <p> + So well he managed, that she changed her plan, + </p> + <p> + And, by degrees, to love him fondly 'gan. + </p> + <p> + The son of Mars a darling husband grew, + </p> + <p> + While yet her former dear was full in view. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + MEANTIME the corpse, that long in chains had swung, + </p> + <p> + By thieves was carried off from where it hung. + </p> + <p> + The noise was heard, and thither ran our wight; + </p> + <p> + But vain his efforts:—they were out of sight; + </p> + <p> + Confused, distressed, he sought again the tomb, + </p> + <p> + To tell his grief and settle, 'mid the gloom, + </p> + <p> + How best to act, and where his head to hide, + </p> + <p> + Since hang he must, the laws would now decide. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE slave replied, your gibbet-thief, you say, + </p> + <p> + Some lurking rogues this night have borne away: + </p> + <p> + The law, it seems, will ne'er accord you grace + </p> + <p> + The corpse that's here, let's set in t'other's place: + </p> + <p> + The passers-by the change will never tell + </p> + <p> + The lady gave consent, and all was well. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + O FICKLE females, ever you're the same; + </p> + <p> + A woman's a woman, both in mind and name + </p> + <p> + Some fair we find, and some unlike the dove, + </p> + <p> + But CONSTANCY'S the highest charm of love. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + YE prudes, for ever doubt of full success; + </p> + <p> + Don't boast at all: too much you may profess, + </p> + <p> + How good soever your design may be, + </p> + <p> + Not less is ours, you easily may see; + </p> + <p> + The MATRON'S tale is not beyond belief: + </p> + <p> + To entertain, our object is in chief. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE widow's only errors were her cries; + </p> + <p> + And mad design her life to sacrifice; + </p> + <p> + For, merely setting husband-dead in place + </p> + <p> + of one of this patibulary race, + </p> + <p> + Was surely not a fault so very grave: + </p> + <p> + Her lover's life was what she sought to save. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A LIVING drum-boy, truly be it said, + </p> + <p> + Is better far, than any monarch dead. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Belphegor" id="Belphegor"></a>BELPHEGOR + </h2> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0289m.jpg" alt="0289m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0289.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <h2> + ADDRESSED TO MISS DE CHAMMELAY + </h2><p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">Y</span>OUR name with ev'ry pleasure here I place, + </p> + <p> + The last effusions of my muse to grace. + </p> + <p> + O charming Phillis! may the same extend + </p> + <p> + Through time's dark night: our praise together blend; + </p> + <p> + To this we surely may pretend to aim + </p> + <p> + Your acting and my rhymes attention claim. + </p> + <p> + Long, long in mem'ry's page your fame shall live; + </p> + <p> + You, who such ecstacy so often give; + </p> + <p> + O'er minds, o'er hearts triumphantly you reign: + </p> + <p> + In Berenice, in Phaedra, and Chimene, + </p> + <p> + Your tears and plaintive accents all engage: + </p> + <p> + Beyond compare in proud Camilla's rage; + </p> + <p> + Your voice and manner auditors delight; + </p> + <p> + Who strong emotions can so well excite? + </p> + <p> + No fine eulogium from my pen expect: + </p> + <p> + With you each air and grace appear correct + </p> + <p> + My first of Phillis's you ought to be; + </p> + <p> + My sole affection had been placed on thee; + </p> + <p> + Long since, had I presumed the truth to tell; + </p> + <p> + But he who loves would fain be loved as well. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NO hope of gaining such a charming fair, + </p> + <p> + Too soon, perhaps, I ceded to despair; + </p> + <p> + Your friend, was all I ventured to be thought, + </p> + <p> + Though in your net I more than half was caught. + </p> + <p> + Most willingly your lover I'd have been; + </p> + <p> + But time it is our story should be seen. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ONE, day, old Satan, sov'reign dread of hell; + </p> + <p> + Reviewed his subjects, as our hist'ries tell; + </p> + <p> + The diff'rent ranks, confounded as they stood, + </p> + <p> + Kings, nobles, females, and plebeian blood, + </p> + <p> + Such grief expressed, and made such horrid cries, + </p> + <p> + As almost stunned, and filled him with surprise. + </p> + <p> + The monarch, as he passed, desired to know + </p> + <p> + The cause that sent each shade to realms below. + </p> + <p> + Some said—my HUSBAND; others WIFE replied; + </p> + <p> + The same was echoed loud from ev'ry side. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + His majesty on this was heard to say: + </p> + <p> + If truth these shadows to my ears convey, + </p> + <p> + With ease our glory we may now augment: + </p> + <p> + I'm fully bent to try th' experiment. + </p> + <p> + With this design we must some demon send, + </p> + <p> + Who wily art with prudence well can blend; + </p> + <p> + And, not content with watching Hymen's flock, + </p> + <p> + Must add his own experience to the stock. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE sable senate instantly approved + </p> + <p> + The proposition that the monarch moved; + </p> + <p> + Belphegor was to execute the work; + </p> + <p> + The proper talent in him seemed to lurk: + </p> + <p> + All ears and eyes, a prying knave in grain + </p> + <p> + In short, the very thing they wished to gain. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THAT he might all expense and cost defray, + </p> + <p> + They gave him num'rous bills without delay, + </p> + <p> + And credit too, in ev'ry place of note, + </p> + <p> + With various things that might their plan promote. + </p> + <p> + He was, besides, the human lot to fill, + </p> + <p> + Of pleasure and of pain:—of good and ill; + </p> + <p> + In fact, whate'er for mortals was designed, + </p> + <p> + With his legation was to be combined. + </p> + <p> + He might by industry and wily art, + </p> + <p> + His own afflictions dissipate in part; + </p> + <p> + But die he could not, nor his country see, + </p> + <p> + Till he ten years complete on earth should be. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BEHOLD him trav'lling o'er th' extensive space; + </p> + <p> + Between the realms of darkness and our race. + </p> + <p> + To pass it, scarcely he a moment took; + </p> + <p> + On Florence instantly he cast a look;— + </p> + <p> + Delighted with the beauty of the spot, + </p> + <p> + He there resolved to fix his earthly lot, + </p> + <p> + Regarding it as proper for his wiles, + </p> + <p> + A city famed for wanton freaks and guiles. + </p> + <p> + Belphegor soon a noble mansion hired, + </p> + <p> + And furnished it with ev'ry thing desired; + </p> + <p> + As signor Roderick he designed to pass; + </p> + <p> + His equipage was large of ev'ry class; + </p> + <p> + Expense anticipating day by day, + </p> + <p> + What, in ten years, he had to throw away. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HIS noble entertainments raised surprise; + </p> + <p> + Magnificence alone would not suffice; + </p> + <p> + Delightful pleasures he dispensed around, + </p> + <p> + And flattery abundantly was found, + </p> + <p> + An art in which a demon should excel: + </p> + <p> + No devil surely e'er was liked so well. + </p> + <p> + His heart was soon the object of the FAIR; + </p> + <p> + To please Belphegor was their constant care. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHO lib'rally with presents smoothes the road, + </p> + <p> + Will meet no obstacles to LOVE'S abode. + </p> + <p> + In ev'ry situation they are sweet, + </p> + <p> + I've often said, and now the same repeat: + </p> + <p> + The primum mobile of human kind, + </p> + <p> + Are gold and silver, through the world we find. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR envoy kept two books, in which he wrote + </p> + <p> + The names of all the married pairs of note; + </p> + <p> + But that assigned to couples satisfied, + </p> + <p> + He scarcely for it could a name provide, + </p> + <p> + Which made the demon almost blush to see, + </p> + <p> + How few, alas! in wedlock's chains agree; + </p> + <p> + While presently the other, which contained + </p> + <p> + Th' unhappy—not a leaf in blank remained. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + No other choice Belphegor now had got, + </p> + <p> + Than—try himself the hymeneal knot. + </p> + <p> + In Florence he beheld a certain fair, + </p> + <p> + With charming face and smart engaging air; + </p> + <p> + Of noble birth, but puffed with empty pride; + </p> + <p> + Some marks of virtue, though not much beside. + </p> + <p> + For Roderick was asked this lofty dame; + </p> + <p> + The father said Honesta* (such her name) + </p> + <p> + Had many eligible offers found; + </p> + <p> + But, 'mong the num'rous band that hovered round, + </p> + <p> + Perhaps his daughter, Rod'rick's suit might take, + </p> + <p> + Though he should wish for time the choice to make. + </p> + <p> + This approbation met, and Rod'rick 'gan + </p> + <p> + To use his arts and execute his plan. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE entertainments, balls, and serenades, + </p> + <p> + Plays, concerts, presents, feasts, and masquerades, + </p> + <p> + Much lessened what the demon with him brought; + </p> + <p> + He nothing grudged:—whate'er was wished he bought. + </p> + <p> + The dame believed high honour she bestowed, + </p> + <p> + When she attention to his offer showed; + </p> + <p> + And, after prayers, entreaties, and the rest, + </p> + <p> + To be his wife she full assent expressed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BUT first a pettifogger to him came, + </p> + <p> + Of whom (aside) Belphegor made a game; + </p> + <p> + What! said the demon, is a lady gained + </p> + <p> + just like a house?—these scoundrels have obtained + </p> + <p> + Such pow'r and sway, without them nothing's done; + </p> + <p> + But hell will get them when their course is run. + </p> + <p> + He reasoned properly; when faith's no more, + </p> + <p> + True honesty is forced to leave the door; + </p> + <p> + When men with confidence no longer view + </p> + <p> + Their fellow-mortals,—happiness adieu! + </p> + <p> + The very means we use t' escape the snare, + </p> + <p> + Oft deeper plunge us in the gulph of care; + </p> + <p> + Avoid attorneys, if you comfort crave + </p> + <p> + Who knows a PETTIFOGGER, knows a KNAVE; + </p> + <p> + Their contracts, filled with IFS and FORS, appear + </p> + <p> + The gate through which STRIFE found admittance here. + </p> + <p> + In vain we hope again the earth 'twill leave + </p> + <p> + Still STRIFE remains, and we ourselves deceive: + </p> + <p> + In spite of solemn forms and laws we see, + </p> + <p> + That LOVE and HYMEN often disagree. + </p> + <p> + The heart alone can tranquilize the mind; + </p> + <p> + In mutual passion ev'ry bliss we find. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HOW diff'rent things in other states appear! + </p> + <p> + With friends—'tis who can be the most sincere; + </p> + <p> + With lovers—all is sweetness, balm of life; + </p> + <p> + While all is IRKSOMENESS with man and wife. + </p> + <p> + We daily see from DUTY springs disgust, + </p> + <p> + And PLEASURE likes true LIBERTY to trust. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ARE happy marriages for ever flown? + </p> + <p> + On full consideration I will own, + </p> + <p> + That when each other's follies couples bear; + </p> + <p> + They then deserve the name of HAPPY PAIR. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ENOUGH of this:—no sooner had our wight + </p> + <p> + The belle possessed, and passed the month's delight; + </p> + <p> + But he perceived what marriage must be here, + </p> + <p> + With such a demon in our nether sphere. + </p> + <p> + For ever jars and discords rang around; + </p> + <p> + Of follies, ev'ry class our couple found; + </p> + <p> + Honesta often times such noise would make, + </p> + <p> + Her screams and cries the neighbours kept awake, + </p> + <p> + Who, running thither, by the wife were told:— + </p> + <p> + Some paltry tradesman's daughter, coarse and bold, + </p> + <p> + He should have had:—not one of rank like me; + </p> + <p> + To treat me thus, what villain he must be! + </p> + <p> + A wife so virtuous, could he e'er deserve! + </p> + <p> + My scruples are too great, or I should swerve; + </p> + <p> + Indeed, without dispute, 'twould serve him right:— + </p> + <p> + We are not sure she nothing did in spite; + </p> + <p> + These prudes can make us credit what they please: + </p> + <p> + Few ponder long when they can dupe with ease. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS wife and husband, as our hist'ries say, + </p> + <p> + Each moment squabbled through the passing day; + </p> + <p> + Their disagreements often would arise + </p> + <p> + About a petticoat, cards, tables, pies, + </p> + <p> + Gowns, chairs, dice, summer-houses, in a word, + </p> + <p> + Things most ridiculous and quite absurd. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WELL might this spouse regret his Hell profound, + </p> + <p> + When he considered what he'd met on ground. + </p> + <p> + To make our demon's wretchedness complete, + </p> + <p> + Honesta's relatives, from ev'ry street, + </p> + <p> + He seemed to marry, since he daily fed + </p> + <p> + The father, mother, sister (fit to wed,) + </p> + <p> + And little brother, whom he sent to school; + </p> + <p> + While MISS he portioned to a wealthy fool. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + His utter ruin, howsoe'er, arose + </p> + <p> + From his attorney-steward that he chose. + </p> + <p> + What's that? you ask—a wily sneaking knave, + </p> + <p> + Who, while his master spends, contrives to save; + </p> + <p> + Till, in the end, grown rich, the lands he buys, + </p> + <p> + Which his good lord is forced to sacrifice. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IF, in the course of time, the master take + </p> + <p> + The place of steward, and his fortune make, + </p> + <p> + 'Twould only to their proper rank restore, + </p> + <p> + Those who become just what they were before. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + POOR Rod'rick now no other hope had got, + </p> + <p> + Than what the chance of traffick might allot; + </p> + <p> + Illusion vain, or doubtful at the best:— + </p> + <p> + Though some grow rich, yet all are not so blessed. + </p> + <p> + 'Twas said our husband never would succeed; + </p> + <p> + And truly, such it seemed to be decreed. + </p> + <p> + His agents (similar to those we see + </p> + <p> + In modern days) were with his treasure free; + </p> + <p> + His ships were wrecked; his commerce came to naught; + </p> + <p> + Deceived by knaves, of whom he well had thought; + </p> + <p> + Obliged to borrow money, which to pay, + </p> + <p> + He was unable at th' appointed day, + </p> + <p> + He fled, and with a farmer shelter took, + </p> + <p> + Where he might hope the bailiffs would not look. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HE told to Matthew, (such the farmer's name,) + </p> + <p> + His situation, character, and fame: + </p> + <p> + By duns assailed, and harassed by a wife, + </p> + <p> + Who proved the very torment of his life, + </p> + <p> + He knew no place of safety to obtain, + </p> + <p> + Like ent'ring other bodies, where 'twas plain, + </p> + <p> + He might escape the catchpole's prowling eye, + </p> + <p> + Honesta's wrath, and all her rage defy. + </p> + <p> + From these he promised he would thrice retire; + </p> + <p> + Whenever Matthew should the same desire: + </p> + <p> + Thrice, but no more, t'oblige this worthy man, + </p> + <p> + Who shelter gave when from the fiends he ran. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE AMBASSADOR commenced his form to change:— + </p> + <p> + From human frame to frame he 'gan to range; + </p> + <p> + But what became his own fantastick state, + </p> + <p> + Our books are silent, nor the facts relate. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AN only daughter was the first he seized, + </p> + <p> + Whose charms corporeal much our demon pleased; + </p> + <p> + But Matthew, for a handsome sum of gold, + </p> + <p> + Obliged him, at a word, to quit his hold. + </p> + <p> + This passed at Naples—next to Rome he came, + </p> + <p> + Where, with another fair, he did the same; + </p> + <p> + But still the farmer banished him again, + </p> + <p> + So well he could the devil's will restrain; + </p> + <p> + Another weighty purse to him was paid + </p> + <p> + Thrice Matthew drove him out from belle and maid. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE king of Naples had a daughter fair, + </p> + <p> + Admired, adored:—her parents' darling care; + </p> + <p> + In wedlock oft by many princes sought; + </p> + <p> + Within her form, the wily demon thought + </p> + <p> + He might be sheltered from Honesta's rage; + </p> + <p> + And none to drive him thence would dare engage. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NAUGHT else was talked of, in or out of town, + </p> + <p> + But devils driven by the cunning clown; + </p> + <p> + Large sums were offered, if, by any art, + </p> + <p> + He'd make the demon from the fair depart. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AFFLICTED much was Matthew, now to lose + </p> + <p> + The gold thus tendered, but he could not choose, + </p> + <p> + For since Belphegor had obliged him thrice, + </p> + <p> + He durst not hope the demon to entice; + </p> + <p> + Poor man was he, a sinner, who, by chance, + </p> + <p> + (He knew not how, it surely was romance,) + </p> + <p> + Had some few devils, truly, driven out: + </p> + <p> + Most worthy of contempt without a doubt. + </p> + <p> + But all in vain:—the man they took by force; + </p> + <p> + Proceed he must, or hanged he'd be of course. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE demon was before our farmer placed; + </p> + <p> + The sight was by the prince in person graced; + </p> + <p> + The wond'rous contest numbers ran to see, + </p> + <p> + And all the world spectators fain would be. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IF vanquished by the devil:—he must swing; + </p> + <p> + If vanquisher:—'twould thousands to him bring: + </p> + <p> + The gallows was, no doubt, a horrid view; + </p> + <p> + Yet, at the purse, his glances often flew; + </p> + <p> + The evil spirit laughed within his sleeve, + </p> + <p> + To see the farmer tremble, fret, and grieve. + </p> + <p> + He pleaded that the wight he'd thrice obeyed; + </p> + <p> + The demon was by Matthew often prayed; + </p> + <p> + But all in vain,—the more he terror showed, + </p> + <p> + The more Belphegor ridicule bestowed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT length the clown was driven to declare, + </p> + <p> + The fiend he was unable to ensnare; + </p> + <p> + Away they Matthew to the gallows led; + </p> + <p> + But as he went, it entered in his head, + </p> + <p> + And, in a sort of whisper he averred + </p> + <p> + (As was in fact the case) a drum he heard. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE demon, with surprise, to Matthew cried; + </p> + <p> + What noise is that? Honesta, he replied, + </p> + <p> + Who you demands, and every where pursues, + </p> + <p> + The spouse who treats her with such vile abuse. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THESE words were thunder to Belphegor's ears, + </p> + <p> + Who instantly took flight, so great his fears; + </p> + <p> + To hell's abyss he fled without delay, + </p> + <p> + To tell adventures through the realms of day. + </p> + <p> + Sire, said the demon, it is clearly true, + </p> + <p> + Damnation does the marriage knot pursue. + </p> + <p> + Your highness often hither sees arrive, + </p> + <p> + Not squads, but regiments, who, when alive, + </p> + <p> + By Hymen were indissolubly tied:— + </p> + <p> + In person I the fact have fully tried. + </p> + <p> + Th' institution, perhaps, most just could be: + </p> + <p> + Past ages far more happiness might see; + </p> + <p> + But ev'ry thing, with time, corruption shows; + </p> + <p> + No jewel in your crown more lustre throws. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BELPHEGOR'S tale by Satan was believed; + </p> + <p> + Reward he got: the term, which-sorely grieved, + </p> + <p> + Was now reduced; indeed, what had he done, + </p> + <p> + That should prevent it?—If away he'd run, + </p> + <p> + Who would not do the same who weds a shrew? + </p> + <p> + Sure worse below the devil never knew! + </p> + <p> + A brawling woman's tongue, what saint can bear? + </p> + <p> + E'en Job, Honesta would have taught despair. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHAT is the inference? you ask:—I'll tell;— + </p> + <p> + Live single, if you know you are well; + </p> + <p> + But if old Hymen o'er your senses reign, + </p> + <p> + Beware Honestas, or you'll rue the chain. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + * By this character La Fontaine is supposed to + </p> + <p> + have meant his own wife. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Little_Bell" id="Little_Bell"></a>THE LITTLE BELL + </h2> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0303m.jpg" alt="0303m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0303.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HOW weak is man! how changeable his mind! + </p> + <p> + His promises are naught, too oft we find; + </p> + <p> + I vowed (I hope in tolerable verse,) + </p> + <p> + Again no idle story to rehearse. + </p> + <p> + And whence this promise?—Not two days ago; + </p> + <p> + I'm quite confounded; better I should know: + </p> + <p> + A rhymer hear then, who himself can boast, + </p> + <p> + Quite steady for—a minute at the most. + </p> + <p> + The pow'rs above could PRUDENCE ne'er design; + </p> + <p> + For those who fondly court the SISTERS NINE. + </p> + <p> + Some means to please they've got, you will confess; + </p> + <p> + But none with certainty the charm possess. + </p> + <p> + If, howsoever, I were doomed to find + </p> + <p> + Such lines as fully would content the mind: + </p> + <p> + Though I should fail in matter, still in art; + </p> + <p> + I might contrive some pleasure to impart. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + LET'S see what we are able to obtain:— + </p> + <p> + A bachelor resided in Touraine. + </p> + <p> + A sprightly youth, who oft the maids beset, + </p> + <p> + And liked to prattle to the girls he met, + </p> + <p> + With sparkling eyes, white teeth, and easy air, + </p> + <p> + Plain russet petticoat and flowing hair, + </p> + <p> + Beside a rivulet, while Io round, + </p> + <p> + With little bell that gave a tinkling sound, + </p> + <p> + On herbs her palate gratified at will, + </p> + <p> + And gazed and played, and fondly took her fill. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AMONG the rustic nymphs our spark perceived + </p> + <p> + A charming girl, for whom his bosom heaved; + </p> + <p> + Too young, however, to feel the poignant smart, + </p> + <p> + By Cupid oft inflicted on the heart. + </p> + <p> + I will not say thirteen's an age unfit + </p> + <p> + The contrary most fully I admit; + </p> + <p> + The LAW supposes (such its prudent fears) + </p> + <p> + Maturity at still more early years; + </p> + <p> + But this apparently refers to towns, + </p> + <p> + While LOVE was born for groves, and lawns, and downs. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0307m.jpg" alt="0307m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0307.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + THE youth exerted ev'ry art to please; + </p> + <p> + But all in vain: he only seemed to teaze: + </p> + <p> + Whate'er he said, however nicely graced, + </p> + <p> + Ill-humour, inexperience, or distaste, + </p> + <p> + Induced the belle, unlearned in Cupid's book; + </p> + <p> + To treat his passion with a froward look. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BELIEVING ev'ry artifice in love + </p> + <p> + Was tolerated by the pow'rs above, + </p> + <p> + One eve he turned a heifer from the rest; + </p> + <p> + Conducted by the girl his thoughts possessed; + </p> + <p> + The others left, not counted by the fair, + </p> + <p> + (Youth seldom shows the necessary care,) + </p> + <p> + With easy, loit'ring steps the cottage sought, + </p> + <p> + Where ev'ry night they usually were brought. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HER mother, more experienced than the maid, + </p> + <p> + Observed, that from the cattle one had strayed; + </p> + <p> + The girl was scolded much, and sent to find + </p> + <p> + The heifer indiscreetly left behind. + </p> + <p> + Fair Isabella gave a vent to tears; + </p> + <p> + Invoked sweet echo to disperse her fears: + </p> + <p> + Solicited with fervent, piercing cry, + </p> + <p> + To tell her where lorn Io she might spy, + </p> + <p> + Whose little bell the spark deprived of sound; + </p> + <p> + When he withdrew her from the herd around. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0311m.jpg" alt="0311m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0311.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + THE lover now the tinkling metal shook; + </p> + <p> + The path that t'wards it led the charmer took. + </p> + <p> + The well known note was pleasing to her ear; + </p> + <p> + Without suspecting treachery was near, + </p> + <p> + She followed to a wood, both deep and large, + </p> + <p> + In hopes at least she might regain her charge. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + GUESS her surprise, good reader, when she heard, + </p> + <p> + A lover's voice, who would not be deterred. + </p> + <p> + Said he, fair maid whene'er the heart's on fire, + </p> + <p> + 'Tis all permitted that can quench desire. + </p> + <p> + On this, with piercing cries she rent the air; + </p> + <p> + But no one came:—she sunk to dire despair. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + YE beauteous dames avoid the Sylvan shade; + </p> + <p> + Dread dangers solitary woods pervade. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Glutton" id="Glutton"></a>THE GLUTTON + </h2> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0313m.jpg" alt="0313m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0313.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A STURGEON, once, a glutton famed was led + </p> + <p> + To have for supper—all, except the head. + </p> + <p> + With wond'rous glee he feasted on the fish; + </p> + <p> + And quickly swallowed down the royal dish. + </p> + <p> + O'ercharged, howe'er, his stomach soon gave way; + </p> + <p> + And doctors were required without delay. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0317m.jpg" alt="0317m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0317.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + THE danger imminent, his friends desired + </p> + <p> + He'd settle ev'ry thing affairs required. + </p> + <p> + Said he, in that respect I'm quite prepared; + </p> + <p> + And, since my time so little is declared, + </p> + <p> + With diligence, I earnestly request, + </p> + <p> + The sturgeon's head you'll get me nicely dressed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + + <p> + <a name="p237" id="p237"></a><img alt="p237.jpg (46K)" + src="images/p237.jpg" height="507" width="659" /> + </p> + + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Two_Friends" id="Two_Friends"></a>THE TWO FRIENDS + </h2><p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">A</span>XIOCHUS, a handsome youth of old, + </p> + <p> + And Alcibiades, (both gay and bold,) + </p> + <p> + So well agreed, they kept a beauteous belle, + </p> + <p> + With whom by turns they equally would dwell. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IT happened, one of them so nicely played, + </p> + <p> + The fav'rite lass produced a little maid, + </p> + <p> + Which both extolled, and each his own believed, + </p> + <p> + Though doubtless one or t'other was deceived. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0319m.jpg" alt="0319m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0319.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + BUT when to riper years the bantling grew, + </p> + <p> + And sought her mother's foot-steps to pursue, + </p> + <p> + Each friend desired to be her chosen swain, + </p> + <p> + And neither would a parent's name retain. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SAID one, why brother, she's your very shade; + </p> + <p> + The features are the same-:-your looks pervade. + </p> + <p> + Oh no, the other cried, it cannot be + </p> + <p> + Her chin, mouth, nose, and eyes, with your's agree; + </p> + <p> + But that as 'twill, let me her favours win, + </p> + <p> + And for the pleasure I will risk the sin. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Country_Justice" id="Country_Justice"></a>THE COUNTRY JUSTICE + </h2> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0323m.jpg" alt="0323m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0323.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TWO lawyers to their cause so well adhered, + </p> + <p> + A country justice quite confused appeared, + </p> + <p> + By them the facts were rendered so obscure + </p> + <p> + With which the truth remained he was not sure. + </p> + <p> + At length, completely tired, two straws he sought + </p> + <p> + Of diff'rent lengths, and to the parties brought. + </p> + <p> + These in his hand he held:—the plaintiff drew + </p> + <p> + (So fate decreed) the shortest of the two. + </p> + <p> + On this the other homeward took his way, + </p> + <p> + To boast how nicely he had gained the day. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE bench complained: the magistrate replied + </p> + <p> + Don't blame I pray—'tis nothing new I've tried; + </p> + <p> + Courts often judge at hazard in the law, + </p> + <p> + Without deciding by the longest straw. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Alice_Sick" id="Alice_Sick"></a>ALICE SICK + </h2> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0327m.jpg" alt="0327m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0327.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SICK, Alice grown, and fearing dire event, + </p> + <p> + Some friend advised a servant should be sent + </p> + <p> + Her confessor to bring and ease her mind;— + </p> + <p> + Yes, she replied, to see him I'm inclined; + </p> + <p> + Let father Andrew instantly be sought:— + </p> + <p> + By him salvation usually I'm taught. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0331m.jpg" alt="0331m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0331.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + <br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0333m.jpg" alt="0333m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0333.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + A MESSENGER was told, without delay, + </p> + <p> + To take, with rapid steps, the convent way; + </p> + <p> + He rang the bell—a monk enquired his name, + </p> + <p> + And asked for what, or whom, the fellow came. + </p> + <p> + I father Andrew want, the wight replied, + </p> + <p> + Who's oft to Alice confessor and guide: + </p> + <p> + With Andrew, cried the other, would you speak? + </p> + <p> + If that's the case, he's far enough to seek; + </p> + <p> + Poor man! he's left us for the regions blessed, + </p> + <p> + And has in Paradise ten years confessed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Kiss_Returned" id="Kiss_Returned"></a>THE KISS RETURNED + </h2> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0335m.jpg" alt="0335m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0335.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AS WILLIAM walking with his wife was seen, + </p> + <p> + A man of rank admired her lovely mien. + </p> + <p> + Who gave you such a charming fair? he cried, + </p> + <p> + May I presume to kiss your beauteous bride? + </p> + <p> + With all my heart, replied the humble swain, + </p> + <p> + You're welcome, sir:—I beg you'll not refrain; + </p> + <p> + She's at your service: take the boon, I pray; + </p> + <p> + You'll not such offers meet with ev'ry day. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE gentleman proceeded as desired; + </p> + <p> + To get a kiss, alone he had aspired; + </p> + <p> + So fervently howe'er he pressed her lip, + </p> + <p> + That Petronella blushed at ev'ry sip. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0339m.jpg" alt="0339m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0339.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + SEVEN days had scarcely run, when to his arms, + </p> + <p> + The other took a wife with seraph charms; + </p> + <p> + And William was allowed to have a kiss, + </p> + <p> + That filled his soul with soft ecstatick bliss. + </p> + <p> + Cried he, I wish, (and truly I am grieved) + </p> + <p> + That when the gentleman a kiss received, + </p> + <p> + From her I love, he'd gone to greater height, + </p> + <p> + And with my Petronella passed the night. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Sister_Jane" id="Sister_Jane"></a>SISTER JANE + </h2> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0343m.jpg" alt="0343m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0343.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN Sister Jane, who had produced a child, + </p> + <p> + In prayer and penance all her hours beguiled + </p> + <p> + Her sister-nuns around the lattice pressed; + </p> + <p> + On which the abbess thus her flock addressed: + </p> + <p> + Live like our sister Jane, and bid adieu + </p> + <p> + To worldly cares:—have better things in view. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + YES, they replied, we sage like her shall be, + </p> + <p> + When we with love have equally been free. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="An_Imitation" id="An_Imitation"></a>AN IMITATION OF ANACREON + </h2><p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">P</span>AINTER in Paphos and Cythera famed + </p> + <p> + Depict, I pray, the absent Iris' face. + </p> + <p> + Thou hast not seen the lovely nymph I've named; + </p> + <p> + The better for thy peace.—Then will I trace + </p> + <p> + For thy instruction her transcendent grace. + </p> + <p> + Begin with lily white and blushing rose, + </p> + <p> + Take then the Loves and Graces... But what good + </p> + <p> + Words, idle words? for Beauty's Goddess could + </p> + <p> + By Iris be replaced, nor one suppose + </p> + <p> + The secret fraud—their grace so equal shows. + </p> + <p> + Thou at Cythera couldst, at Paphos too, + </p> + <p> + Of the same Iris Venus form anew. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Another_Imitation" id="Another_Imitation"></a>ANOTHER IMITATION + OF ANACREON + </h2> + <div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/0347m.jpg" alt="0347m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/0347.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + PRONE, on my couch I calmly slept + </p> + <p> + Against my wont. A little child + </p> + <p> + Awoke me as he gently crept + </p> + <p> + And beat my door. A tempest wild + </p> + <p> + Was raging-dark and cold the night. + </p> + <p> + "Have pity on my naked plight," + </p> + <p> + He begged, "and ope thy door."—"Thy name?" + </p> + <p> + I asked admitting him.—"The same + </p> + <p> + "Anon I'll tell, but first must dry + </p> + <p> + "My weary limbs, then let me try + </p> + <p> + "My mois'ened bow."—Despite my fear + </p> + <p> + The hearth I lit, then drew me near + </p> + <p> + My guest, and chafed his fingers cold. + </p> + <p> + "Why fear?" I thought. "Let me be bold + </p> + <p> + "No Polyphemus he; what harm + </p> + <p> + "In such a child?—Then I'll be calm!" + </p> + <p> + The playful boy drew out a dart, + </p> + <p> + Shook his fair locks, and to my heart + </p> + <p> + His shaft he launch'd.—"Love is my name," + </p> + <p> + He thankless cried, "I hither came + </p> + <p> + "To tame thee. In thine ardent pain + </p> + <p> + "Of Cupid think and young Climene."— + </p> + <p> + "Ah! now I know thee, little scamp, + </p> + <p> + "Ungrateful, cruel boy! Decamp!" + </p> + <p> + Cupid a saucy caper cut, + </p> + <p> + Skipped through the door, and as it shut, + </p> + <p> + "My bow," he taunting cried, "is sound, + </p> + <p> + "Thy heart, poor comrade, feels the wound." <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + + <h2> + <a name="PREFACE_2" id="PREFACE_2"></a>THE AUTHOR'S PREFACE + </h2> + <h2> + TO HIS SECOND BOOK OF THESE TALES + </h2> + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + These are the last works of this style that will come from the pen of the + Author, and consequently this is the last opportunity he has of + vindicating the boldness and privilege which he has assumed. We make no + mention of villainous rhymes, of lines that run into the next, of two + vowels without elision, nor, in general, of such kinds of carelessness as + he would not allow himself in another style of poetry, but which are part + and parcel, so to say, of this style. Too anxious a care in avoiding such + would force a tale-writer into a labyrinth of shifts, into narratives as + dull as they are grand, into straits that are utterly useless, and would + make him disregard the pleasure of the heart in order to labour for the + gratification of the ear. We must leave studied narrative for lofty + subjects, and not compose an epic poem of the Adventures of Renaud d'Ast. + Suppose the Author, who has put these tales into rhyme, had brought to + bear on them all the care and preciseness required of him; not only would + this care be observed, especially as it is unnecessary, but it would also + transgress the precept lain down by Ouintilian, still the Author would not + have attained the main object, which is to interest the reader, to charm + him, to rivet his attention in spite of himself,—in a word, to + please him. As everybody knows, the secret of pleasing the reader is not + always based on regulation, nor even on symmetry; there is need of + smartness and tastefulness, if we would strike home. How many of those + perfect types of beauty do we see which never strike home, and of which + nobody feels enamoured! We do not wish to rob Modern Authors of the praise + that is due to them. Nicely turned lines, fine language, accuracy, + elegance of rhyme are accomplishments in a poet. However that may be, let + us consider of our own epigrams wherein all these qualities are combined, + perhaps we shall find in them far less point, nay, I would venture to add, + far less charm than in those of Marot or Saint-Gelais, although almost all + the works of the latter poets are full of the same faults as are + attributed to us. We will be told that these were not faults in their day, + whereas they are very great faults in ours. To this we answer by a similar + kind of argument, by saying, as we have already said, that these would + undoubtedly be faults in another style of poetry, but not in this. The + late M. de Voiture is a proof in point. We need only read the works in + which he brings to life again the character of Marot. For our Author does + not lay claim to praise for himself, nor to rounds of applause from the + public for having put a few tales into rhyme. Without doubt he has entered + on quite a new path, and has pursued it to the utmost of his power, + choosing now one road, now another, and always treading with surer step + when he has followed the manner of our old poets "quorum in hae re imitari + negligentiam exoptat potius quam istorum diligentiam." <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + But while saying that we wished to waive this question, we have + unconsciously involved ourselves in its discussion. Perhaps this has not + been without advantage; for there is nothing that resembles faults more + than these licenses. Let us now consider the liberty which the Author has + assumed in cutting into the property of others as well as his own, without + making exception even to the best known stories, none of which he scruples + to tamper with. He curtails, enlarges, and alters incidents and details, + at times the main issue and the sequel; in short, the story is no longer + the same; it is, in point of fact, quite a new tale; its original author + would find it no small difficulty to recognise in it his own work. "Non + sic decet contaminari fabulas," Critics will say. Why should they not? + They twitted Terence in just the same way; but Terence sneered at them, + and claimed a right to treat the matter as he did. He has mingled his own + ideas with the subjects he drew from Menander, just as Sophocles and + Euripides mingled theirs with the subjects they drew from former writers, + sparing neither history nor romance, where "decorum" and the rules of the + Drama were at issue. Shall this privilege cease with respect to fictitious + stories? Must we in future have more scrupulous or religious regard, if we + may be allowed the expression, for falsehood than the Ancients had for + truth? What people call a good tale never passes from hand to hand without + receiving some fresh touch of embellishment. How comes it then, we may be + asked, that in many passages the Author curtails instead of enlarging on + the original? On that point we are agreed: the Author does so in order to + avoid lengthiness and ambiguity,—two faults which are inadmissible + in such matters, especially the latter. For if lucidity is to be commended + in all literary works, we may say that it is especially necessary in + narratives, where one thing is, as a rule, the sequel and the result of + another; where the less important sometimes lays the basis of the more + important; so that, once the thread becomes broken, the reader cannot + gather it up again. Besides, as narratives in verse are very awkward, the + author must clog himself with details as little as possible; by means of + this you relieve not only yourself, but also the reader, for whom an + author should not fail to prepare pleasure unalloyed. Whenever the Author + has altered a few particulars and even a few catastrophes, he has been + forced to do so by the cause of that catastrophe and the urgency of giving + it a happy termination. He has fancied that in tales of this kind everyone + ought to be satisfied with the end: it pleases the reader at any rate, if + the author has not given the characters too distasteful a rendering. But + he must not go so far as that, if possible, nor make the reader laugh and + cry in the same tale. This medley shocks Horace above all things; his wish + is not that our works should border on the grotesque, and that we should + draw a picture half woman half fish. These are the general motives the + Author has had in view. We might still quote special motives and vindicate + each point; but we must needs leave something to the capacity and leniency + of our readers. They will be satisfied, then, with the motives we have + mentioned. We would have stated them more clearly and have set more by + them, had the general compass of a Preface so allowed. <br /><br /> + </p> + <hr /> + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> <a name="p1b" id="p1b"></a><img + alt="p1b.jpg (37K)" src="images/p1b.jpg" height="492" width="664" /> + </p> + + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Friar_Phillip" id="Friar_Phillip"></a>FRIAR PHILIP'S GEESE + </h2><p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">I</span>F these gay tales give pleasure to the FAIR, + </p> + <p> + The honour's great conferred, I'm well aware; + </p> + <p> + Yet, why suppose the sex my pages shun? + </p> + <p> + Enough, if they condemn where follies run; + </p> + <p> + Laugh in their sleeve at tricks they disapprove, + </p> + <p> + And, false or true, a muscle never move. + </p> + <p> + A playful jest can scarcely give offence: + </p> + <p> + Who knows too much, oft shows a want of sense. + </p> + <p> + From flatt'ry oft more dire effects arise, + </p> + <p> + Enflame the heart and take it by surprise; + </p> + <p> + Ye beauteous belles, beware each sighing swain, + </p> + <p> + Discard his vows:—my book with care retain; + </p> + <p> + Your safety then I'll guarantee at ease.— + </p> + <p> + But why dismiss?—their wishes are to please: + </p> + <p> + And, truly, no necessity appears + </p> + <p> + For solitude:—consider well your years. + </p> + <p> + I HAVE, and feel convinced they do you wrong, + </p> + <p> + Who think no virtue can to such belong; + </p> + <p> + White crows and phoenixes do not abound; + </p> + <p> + But lucky lovers still are sometimes found; + </p> + <p> + And though, as these famed birds, not quite so rare, + </p> + <p> + The numbers are not great that favours share; + </p> + <p> + I own my works a diff'rent sense express, + </p> + <p> + But these are tales:—mere tales in easy dress. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + To beauty's wiles, in ev'ry class, I've bowed; + </p> + <p> + Fawned, flattered, sighed, e'en constancy have vowed + </p> + <p> + What gained? you ask—but little I admit; + </p> + <p> + Howe'er we aim, too oft we fail to hit. + </p> + <p> + My latter days I'll now devote with care, + </p> + <p> + To guard the sex from ev'ry latent snare. + </p> + <p> + Tales I'll detail, and these relate at ease: + </p> + <p> + Narrations clear and neat will always please; + </p> + <p> + Like me, to this attention criticks pay; + </p> + <p> + Then sleep, on either side, from night till day. + </p> + <p> + If awkward, vulgar phrase intervene, + </p> + <p> + Or rhymes imperfect o'er the page be seen, + </p> + <p> + Condemn at will; but stratagems and art, + </p> + <p> + Pass, shut your eyes, who'd heed the idle part? + </p> + <p> + Some mothers, husbands, may perhaps be led, + </p> + <p> + To pull my locks for stories white or red; + </p> + <p> + So matters stand: a fine affair, no doubt, + </p> + <p> + And what I've failed to do—my book makes out. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20030m.jpg" alt="20030m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20030.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + THE FAIR my pages safely may pursue, + </p> + <p> + And this apology they'll not refuse. + </p> + <p> + What recompense can I presume to make? + </p> + <p> + A tale I'll give, where female charms partake, + </p> + <p> + And prove resistless whatsoe'er assail: + </p> + <p> + Blessed BEAUTY, NATURE ever should prevail. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HAD Fate decreed our YOUTH, at early morn, + </p> + <p> + To view the angel features you adorn, + </p> + <p> + The captivating pow'rs AURORA bless, + </p> + <p> + Or airy SPRING bedecked in beauteous dress, + </p> + <p> + And all the azure canopy on high + </p> + <p> + Had vanished like a dream, once you were nigh. + </p> + <p> + And when his eyes at length your charms beheld, + </p> + <p> + His glowing breast with softest passion swelled; + </p> + <p> + Superior lustre beamed at ev'ry view; + </p> + <p> + No pleasures pleased: his soul was fixed on you. + </p> + <p> + Crowns, jewels, palaces, appeared as naught. + </p> + <p> + 'Twas solely beauteous woman now he sought. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A WOOD, from earliest years, his home had been, + </p> + <p> + And birds the only company he'd seen, + </p> + <p> + Whose notes harmonious often lulled his care, + </p> + <p> + Beguiled his hours, and saved him from despair; + </p> + <p> + Delightful sounds! from nightingale and dove + </p> + <p> + Unknown their tongue, yet indicant of love. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS savage, solitary, rustick school, + </p> + <p> + The father chose his infancy to rule. + </p> + <p> + The mother's recent death induced the sire, + </p> + <p> + To place the son where only beasts retire; + </p> + <p> + And long the forest habitants alone + </p> + <p> + Were all his youthful sight had ever known. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TWO reasons, good or bad, the father led + </p> + <p> + To fly the world:—all intercourse to dread + </p> + <p> + Since fate had torn his lovely spouse from hence; + </p> + <p> + Misanthropy and fear o'ercame each sense; + </p> + <p> + Of the world grown tired, he hated all around:— + </p> + <p> + Too oft in solitude is sorrow found. + </p> + <p> + His partner's death produced distaste of life, + </p> + <p> + And made him fear to seek another wife. + </p> + <p> + A hermit's gloomy, mossy cell he took, + </p> + <p> + And wished his child might thither solely look. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AMONG the poor his little wealth he threw, + </p> + <p> + And with his infant son alone withdrew; + </p> + <p> + The forest's dreary wilds concealed his cell; + </p> + <p> + There Philip (such his name) resolved to dwell. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BY holy motives led, and not chagrin, + </p> + <p> + The hermit never spoke of what he'd seen; + </p> + <p> + But, from the youth's discernment, strove to hide, + </p> + <p> + Whate'er regarded love, and much beside, + </p> + <p> + The softer sex, with all their magick charms, + </p> + <p> + That fill the feeling bosom with alarms. + </p> + <p> + As years advanced, the boy with care he taught; + </p> + <p> + What suited best his age before him brought; + </p> + <p> + At five he showed him animals and flow'rs, + </p> + <p> + The birds of air, the beasts, their sev'ral pow'rs; + </p> + <p> + And now and then of hell he gave a hint, + </p> + <p> + Old Satan's wrath, and what might awe imprint, + </p> + <p> + How formed, and doomed to infamy below; + </p> + <p> + In childhood FEAR 's the lesson first we know! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE years had passed away, when Philip tried, + </p> + <p> + In matters more profound his son to guide; + </p> + <p> + He spoke of Paradise and Heav'n above; + </p> + <p> + But not a word of woman,—nor of LOVE. + </p> + <p> + Fifteen arrived, the sire with anxious care, + </p> + <p> + Of NATURE'S works declaimed,—but not the FAIR: + </p> + <p> + An age, when those, for solitude designed, + </p> + <p> + Should be to scenes of seriousness confined, + </p> + <p> + Nor joys of youth, nor soft ideas praised + </p> + <p> + The flame soon spreads when Cupid's torch is raised. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT length, when twenty summers time had run, + </p> + <p> + The father to the city brought his son; + </p> + <p> + With years weighed down, the hermit scarcely knew + </p> + <p> + His daily course of duty to pursue; + </p> + <p> + And when Death's venomed shaft should on him fall; + </p> + <p> + On whom could then his boy for succour call? + </p> + <p> + How life support, unknowing and unknown? + </p> + <p> + Wolves, foxes, bears, ne'er charity have shown; + </p> + <p> + And all the sire could give his darling care, + </p> + <p> + A staff and wallet, he was well aware + </p> + <p> + Fine patrimony, truly, for a child! + </p> + <p> + To which his mind was no way reconciled. + </p> + <p> + Bread few, 'twas clear, the hermit would deny, + </p> + <p> + And rich he might have been you may rely; + </p> + <p> + When he drew near, the children quickly cried + </p> + <p> + Here's father Philip—haste, the alms provide; + </p> + <p> + And many pious men his friends were found, + </p> + <p> + But not one female devotee around: + </p> + <p> + None would he hear; the FAIR he always fled + </p> + <p> + Their smiles and wiles the friar kept in dread. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR hermit, when he thought his darling youth; + </p> + <p> + Well fixed in duty and religious truth, + </p> + <p> + Conveyed him 'mong his pious friends, to learn + </p> + <p> + How food to beg, and other ways discern. + </p> + <p> + In tears he viewed his son the forest quit, + </p> + <p> + And fain would have him for the world unfit. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE city's palaces and lofty spires, + </p> + <p> + Our rustick's bosom filled with new desires. + </p> + <p> + The prince's residence great splendour showed, + </p> + <p> + And lively pleasure on the youth bestowed. + </p> + <p> + What's here? said he; The court, his friends replied:— + </p> + <p> + What there?—The mansions where the great reside:— + </p> + <p> + And these?—Fine statues, noble works of art: + </p> + <p> + All gave delight and gratitude his heart. + </p> + <p> + But when the beauteous FAIR first caught his view, + </p> + <p> + To ev'ry other sight he bade adieu; + </p> + <p> + The palace, court, or mansions he admired, + </p> + <p> + No longer proved the objects he desired; + </p> + <p> + Another cause of admiration rose, + </p> + <p> + His breast pervaded, and disturbed repose. + </p> + <p> + What's this, he cried, so elegantly neat? + </p> + <p> + O tell me, father; make my joy complete! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHAT gave the son such exquisite delight, + </p> + <p> + The parent filled with agonizing fright. + </p> + <p> + To answer, howsoe'er he'd no excuse, + </p> + <p> + So told the youth—a bird they call a goose. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + O BEAUTEOUS bird, exclaimed th' enraptured boy, + </p> + <p> + Sing, sound thy voice, 'twill fill my soul with joy; + </p> + <p> + To thee I'd anxiously be better known; + </p> + <p> + O father, let me have one for my own! + </p> + <p> + A thousand times I fondly ask the boon; + </p> + <p> + Let's take it to the woods: 'tis not too soon; + </p> + <p> + Young as it is, I'll feed it morn and night, + </p> + <p> + And always make it my supreme delight. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Richard_Minutolo" id="Richard_Minutolo"></a>RICHARD MINUTOLO + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20036m.jpg" alt="20036m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20036.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">I</span>N ev'ry age, at Naples, we are told, + </p> + <p> + Intrigue and gallantry reign uncontrolled; + </p> + <p> + With beauteous objects in abundance blessed. + </p> + <p> + No country round so many has possessed; + </p> + <p> + Such fascinating charms the FAIR disclose, + </p> + <p> + That irresistibly soft passion flows. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + 'MONG these a belle, enchanting to behold, + </p> + <p> + Was loved by one, of birth and store of gold; + </p> + <p> + Minutolo (and Richard) was his name, + </p> + <p> + In Cupid's train a youth of brilliant fame: + </p> + <p> + 'Tween Rome and Paris none was more gallant, + </p> + <p> + And num'rous hearts were for him known to pant. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + CATELLA (thus was called our lady fair,) + </p> + <p> + So long, howe'er, resisted Richard's snare, + </p> + <p> + That prayers, and vows, and promises were vain; + </p> + <p> + A favour Minutolo could not gain. + </p> + <p> + At length, our hero weary, coldness showed, + </p> + <p> + And dropt attendance, since no kindness flowed; + </p> + <p> + Pretended to be cured:—another sought, + </p> + <p> + And feigned her charms his tender heart had caught: + </p> + <p> + Catella laughed, but jealousy was nigh; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas for her friend that now He heaved the sigh. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THESE dames together met, and Richard too, + </p> + <p> + The gay gallant a glowing picture drew, + </p> + <p> + Of certain husbands, lovers, prudes, and wives; + </p> + <p> + Who led in secret most lascivious lives. + </p> + <p> + Though none he named, Catella was amazed; + </p> + <p> + His hints suspicions of her husband raised; + </p> + <p> + And such her agitation and affright, + </p> + <p> + That, anxious to procure more certain light, + </p> + <p> + In haste she took Minutolo aside, + </p> + <p> + And begged the names he would not from her hide, + </p> + <p> + With all particulars, from first to last:— + </p> + <p> + Her ardent wish to know whate'er had passed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SO long your reign, said Richard, o'er my mind, + </p> + <p> + Deny I could not, howsoe'er inclined; + </p> + <p> + With Mrs. Simon often is your spouse; + </p> + <p> + Her character no doubt your spleen will rouse; + </p> + <p> + I've no design, observe to give offence, + </p> + <p> + But, when I see your int'rest in suspense, + </p> + <p> + I cannot silent keep; though, were I still + </p> + <p> + A slave, devoted wholly to your will, + </p> + <p> + As late I moved, I would not drop a word + </p> + <p> + Mistrust of lovers may not be absurd; + </p> + <p> + Besides, you'd fancy other motives led + </p> + <p> + To tell you of your husband what was said; + </p> + <p> + But heav'n be praised, of you I nothing want; + </p> + <p> + My object's plain—no more the fond gallant. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + I'VE lately certain information had, + </p> + <p> + Your spouse (I scarcely thought the man so bad,) + </p> + <p> + Has with the lady an appointment made; + </p> + <p> + At Jack's nice bagnio he will meet the jade. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NOW clearly Jack's not rich, and there's no doubt; + </p> + <p> + A hundred ducats give, and—ALL will out; + </p> + <p> + Let him but have a handsome sum in view, + </p> + <p> + And any thing you wish, be sure he'll do; + </p> + <p> + You then can manage ev'ry way so well, + </p> + <p> + That, at the place assigned to meet his belle, + </p> + <p> + You'll take this truant husband by surprise;— + </p> + <p> + Permit me in this nice affair to advise. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE lady has agreed, you will remark, + </p> + <p> + That in a room where ev'ry part is dark, + </p> + <p> + (Perhaps to 'scape the keeper's prying sight, + </p> + <p> + Or shame directs exclusion of the light,) + </p> + <p> + She will receive your gay inconstant spouse; + </p> + <p> + Now, take her place; the case deceit allows; + </p> + <p> + Make Jack your friend; nor haggle at the price; + </p> + <p> + A hundred ducats give, is my advice; + </p> + <p> + He'll place you in the room where darkness reigns; + </p> + <p> + Think not too fast, nor suffer heavy chains; + </p> + <p> + Do what you wish, and utter not a word; + </p> + <p> + To speak, assuredly would be absurd; + </p> + <p> + 'Twould spoil the whole; destroy the project quite; + </p> + <p> + Attend, and see if all things be not right. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE project pleased Catella to the soul; + </p> + <p> + Her wrath, no longer able to controul, + </p> + <p> + She Richard stopt; enough, enough, she cried; + </p> + <p> + I fully understand:—leave me to guide; + </p> + <p> + I'll play the fellow and his wanton lass + </p> + <p> + A pretty trick-shall all their art surpass, + </p> + <p> + Unless the string gives way and spoils my scheme; + </p> + <p> + What, take me for a nincompoop?—they dream. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS said, she sought excuse to get away, + </p> + <p> + And went in quest of Jack without delay. + </p> + <p> + The keeper, howsoe'er, a hint had got; + </p> + <p> + Minutolo had schooled him for the plot; + </p> + <p> + Oft cash does wonders, and, if such the case + </p> + <p> + In France or Britain, when conferred a grace, + </p> + <p> + The bribe is taken, and the truth abused, + </p> + <p> + In Italy it will not be refused; + </p> + <p> + There this sole quiver Cupid useful finds,— <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A purse well stored—all binds, gunlocks, or blinds: + </p> + <p> + Jack took the pelf from Richard and the dame; + </p> + <p> + Had Satan offered—'twould have been the same. + </p> + <p> + In short, Minutolo had full success, + </p> + <p> + All came about, and marked the spark's address. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE lady had at first some warm dispute + </p> + <p> + To many questions Jack was even mute; + </p> + <p> + But when he saw the golden charms unmasked, + </p> + <p> + Far more he promised than Catella asked. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE time of rendezvous arrived, our spark + </p> + <p> + To Jack's repaired, and found the room quite dark; + </p> + <p> + So well arranged, no crevice could he find, + </p> + <p> + Through which the light might hurt what he designed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NOT long he waited, ere our jealous dame, + </p> + <p> + Who longed to find her faithless husband, came, + </p> + <p> + Most thoroughly prepared his ears to greet. + </p> + <p> + Jack brought the couple presently to meet. + </p> + <p> + The lady found, howe'er, not what she sought: + </p> + <p> + No guilty spouse, nor Mrs. Simon caught; + </p> + <p> + But wily Richard, who, without alarms, + </p> + <p> + In silence took Catella in his arms. + </p> + <p> + What further passed between the easy pair, + </p> + <p> + Think what you will, I mean not to declare; + </p> + <p> + The lover certainly received delight + </p> + <p> + The lady showed no terror nor affright; + </p> + <p> + On neither side a syllable was dropt + </p> + <p> + With care Minutolo his laughter stopt; + </p> + <p> + Though difficult, our spark succeeded well; + </p> + <p> + No words of mine can Richard's pleasure tell. + </p> + <p> + His fav'rite beauteous belle he now possessed, + </p> + <p> + And triumphed where so oft he'd been repressed, + </p> + <p> + Yet fondly hoped her pardon he should get, + </p> + <p> + Since they together had so gaily met. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT length, the fair could no longer contain: + </p> + <p> + Vile wretch, she cried, I've borne too much 'tis plain; + </p> + <p> + I'm not the fav'rite whom thou had'st in view: + </p> + <p> + To tear thy eyes out justly were thy due, + </p> + <p> + 'Tis this, indeed, that makes thee silent keep, + </p> + <p> + Each morn feign sickness, and pretend to sleep, + </p> + <p> + Thyself reserving doubtless for amours:— + </p> + <p> + Speak, villain! say, of charms have I less stores? + </p> + <p> + Or what has Mrs. Simon more than I? + </p> + <p> + A wanton wench, in tricks so wondrous sly! + </p> + <p> + Where my love less? though truly now I hate; + </p> + <p> + Would that I'd seen thee hung, thou wretch ingrate! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + MINUTOLO, while thus Catella spoke, + </p> + <p> + Caressed her much, but silence never broke; + </p> + <p> + A kiss e'en tried to gain, without success; + </p> + <p> + She struggled, and refused to acquiesce; + </p> + <p> + Begone! said she, nor treat me like a child; + </p> + <p> + Stand off!—away!—thy taction is defiled; + </p> + <p> + My tears express an injured woman's grief; + </p> + <p> + No more thy wife I'll be, but seek relief; + </p> + <p> + Return my fortune—go:—thy mistress seek; + </p> + <p> + To be so constant:—How was I so weak? + </p> + <p> + It surely would be nothing more than right, + </p> + <p> + Were Richard I to see this very night, + </p> + <p> + Who adoration constantly has paid:— + </p> + <p> + You much deserve to be a cuckold made; + </p> + <p> + I'm half inclined, I vow, to do the worst. + </p> + <p> + At this our arch gallant with laughter burst. + </p> + <p> + What impudence!—You mock me too? she cried + </p> + <p> + Let's see, with blushes if his face be dyed? + </p> + <p> + When from his arms she sprang, a window sought; + </p> + <p> + The shutters ope'd, and then a view she caught; + </p> + <p> + Minutolo, her lover! * * * what surprise! + </p> + <p> + Pale, faint, she instant grew, and closed her eyes: + </p> + <p> + Who would have thought, said she, thou wert so base? + </p> + <p> + I'm lost! * * * for ever sunk in dire disgrace! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHO'LL, know it? Richard earnestly replied; + </p> + <p> + In Jack's concealment we may both confide; + </p> + <p> + Excuse the trick I've played and ne'er repine; + </p> + <p> + Address, force, treachery, in love combine; + </p> + <p> + All are permitted when intrigue 's the word; + </p> + <p> + To hold the contrary were quite absurd. + </p> + <p> + Till stratagem was used I naught could gain, + </p> + <p> + But looks and darts from eyes, for all my pain. + </p> + <p> + I've paid myself;—Would you have done it?—No; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis all as might be wished;—come, smiles bestow; + </p> + <p> + I'm satisfied, the fault was not with you. + </p> + <p> + In this, to make you wretched, naught I view; + </p> + <p> + Why sigh and groan?—What numbers could I name, + </p> + <p> + Who would be happy to be served the same. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HIS reas'ning yet could not the belle appease; + </p> + <p> + She wept, and sought by tears her mind to ease; + </p> + <p> + Affliction highly added to her charms; + </p> + <p> + Minutolo still gave her new alarms; + </p> + <p> + He took her hand, which she at once withdrew: + </p> + <p> + Away, she cried; no longer me pursue; + </p> + <p> + Be satisfied; you surely don't desire + </p> + <p> + That I assistance from the house require, + </p> + <p> + Or rouse the neighbours with my plaintive cries + </p> + <p> + I'll ev'ry thing declare without disguise. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SUCH folly don't commit, replied the spark; + </p> + <p> + Your wisest plan is nothing to remark: + </p> + <p> + The world at present is become so vile, + </p> + <p> + If you the truth divulge, they'll only smile; + </p> + <p> + Not one a word of treachery would believe, + </p> + <p> + But think you came—and money to receive: + </p> + <p> + Suppose, besides, it reached your husband's ears; + </p> + <p> + Th' effect has reason to excite your fears; + </p> + <p> + 'Twould give displeasure and occasion strife: + </p> + <p> + Would you in duels wish to risk his life? + </p> + <p> + Whatever makes you with him disagree, + </p> + <p> + At all events, I'm full as bad as he. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THESE reasons with Catella greatly weighed + </p> + <p> + Since things, continued he, are thus displayed; + </p> + <p> + And cannot be repaired, console your mind; + </p> + <p> + A perfect being never was designed. + </p> + <p> + If, howsoe'er you will * * * but say no more; + </p> + <p> + Such thoughts for ever banish, I implore. + </p> + <p> + 'Mid all my perseverance, zeal, and art, + </p> + <p> + I nothing got but frowns that pierced the heart: + </p> + <p> + 'Twill now on you depend if pleasure prove + </p> + <p> + This day imperfect, ere from hence we move. + </p> + <p> + What more remains to do? the worst is past; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis step the first that costs, however classed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + So well Minutolo preferred his suit, + </p> + <p> + The lady with him more would not dispute, + </p> + <p> + With downcast eyes she listened to his prayer, + </p> + <p> + And looked disposed to tranquilize his care; + </p> + <p> + From easy freedom soon he 'gan to soar; + </p> + <p> + A smile received:—a kiss bestowed and more: + </p> + <p> + At length, the lady passed resistance by, + </p> + <p> + And all conceded, e'en without a sigh. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR hero felt a thousand times more blessed + </p> + <p> + Than when he first the beauteous fair caressed; + </p> + <p> + For when a flame reciprocal is raised, + </p> + <p> + The bliss redoubles, and by all is praised. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THUS Richard pleasantly employed his time, + </p> + <p> + Contented lived, concentring joys sublime. + </p> + <p> + A sample, now, we have given of his pow'rs, + </p> + <p> + And who would wish for more delightful hours? + </p> + <p> + O grant, kind heav'n! that I the like may meet, + </p> + <p> + And ever prove so wary and discreet. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Monks_of_Catalonia" id="Monks_of_Catalonia"></a>THE MONKS OF + CATALONIA + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20046m.jpg" alt="20046m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20046.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">T</span>O you, my friends, allow me to detail, + </p> + <p> + The feats of monks in Catalonia's vale, + </p> + <p> + Where oft the holy fathers pow'rs displayed, + </p> + <p> + And showed such charity to wife and maid, + </p> + <p> + That o'er their minds sweet fascination reigned, + </p> + <p> + And made them think, they Paradise had gained. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SUCH characters oft preciously advise, + </p> + <p> + And youthful easy female minds surprise, + </p> + <p> + The beauteous FAIR encircle with their net, + </p> + <p> + And, of the feeling heart, possession get: + </p> + <p> + Work in the holy vineyard, you may guess, + </p> + <p> + And, as our tale will show, with full success. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IN times of old, when learning 'mong the FAIR, + </p> + <p> + Enough to read the testament, was rare, + </p> + <p> + (Times howsoe'er thought difficult to quote,) + </p> + <p> + A swarm of monks of gormandizing note, + </p> + <p> + Arrived and fixed themselves within a town, + </p> + <p> + For young and beauteous belles of great renown, + </p> + <p> + While, of gallants, there seemed but very few, + </p> + <p> + Though num'rous aged husbands you might view. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A NOBLE chapel soon the fathers raised, + </p> + <p> + To which the females ran and highly praised, + </p> + <p> + Surveyed it o'er and confidently thought, + </p> + <p> + 'Twas there, of course, salvation should be sought. + </p> + <p> + And when their faith had thoroughly been proved, + </p> + <p> + To gain their point the monks the veil removed.— + </p> + <p> + Good father Andrew scorned to use finesse, + </p> + <p> + And in discourse the sex would thus address. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IF any thing prevent your sov'reign bliss, + </p> + <p> + And Paradise incautiously you miss, + </p> + <p> + Most certainly the evil will arise, + </p> + <p> + From keeping for your husbands large supplies, + </p> + <p> + Of what a surplus you have clearly got, + </p> + <p> + And more than requisite to them allot, + </p> + <p> + Without bestowing on your trusty friends, + </p> + <p> + The saving that to no one blessings lends. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + PERHAPS you'll tell me, marriage boons we shun; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis true, and Heav'n be praised enough is done, + </p> + <p> + Without those duties to require our share + </p> + <p> + You know from direful sin we guard the FAIR. + </p> + <p> + Ingratitude 's declared the height of crimes, + </p> + <p> + And God pronounced it such in early times; + </p> + <p> + For this eternally was Satan curst; + </p> + <p> + Howe'er you err, be careful of the worst. + </p> + <p> + Return to Heav'n your thanks for bounteous care, + </p> + <p> + And then to us a tithe of surplus spare, + </p> + <p> + Which costs you nothing worth a moment's thought; + </p> + <p> + And marks the zeal with which our faith is taught, + </p> + <p> + A claim legitimate our order opes, + </p> + <p> + Bestowed, for holy offices, by popes, + </p> + <p> + No charitable gift, but lawful right: + </p> + <p> + Priests well supported are a glorious sight. + </p> + <p> + Four times a year, exactly to a day, + </p> + <p> + Each wife this tithe should personally pay + </p> + <p> + Our holy saint requires that you submit: + </p> + <p> + 'Tis founded on decrees of holy writ. + </p> + <p> + All Nature carefully the law reveres, + </p> + <p> + That gratitude and fealty endears. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NOW marriage works we rank as an estate, + </p> + <p> + And tithe is due for that at any rate. + </p> + <p> + We'll take it patiently, whate'er the toil: + </p> + <p> + Nor be o'er nice about the justful spoil. + </p> + <p> + Our order have not, you must surely know, + </p> + <p> + By many comforts, what we wish below. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + 'TIS right, however, that I now suggest, + </p> + <p> + Whatever passes must not be expressed; + </p> + <p> + But naught to husbands, parents, friends, reveal; + </p> + <p> + From ev'ry one the mysterious conceal. + </p> + <p> + Three words th' apostle taught: be these your care; + </p> + <p> + FAITH, CHARITY, and PRUDENCE learn to share. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE holy father, by his fine discourse, + </p> + <p> + Delivered with the most impressive force, + </p> + <p> + Gave wonderous satisfaction and surprise, + </p> + <p> + And passed with all for Solomon the wise; + </p> + <p> + Few slept while Andrew preached, and ev'ry wife, + </p> + <p> + His precepts guarded as she would her life; + </p> + <p> + And these not solely treasured in the mind, + </p> + <p> + But showed to practise them the heart inclined, + </p> + <p> + Each hastened tithe to bring without delay, + </p> + <p> + And quarrelled who should be the first to pay; + </p> + <p> + Loud murmurs rang, and many city dames, + </p> + <p> + Were forced to keep till morn the friar's claims, + </p> + <p> + And HOLY CHURCH, not knowing what to do, + </p> + <p> + Such numbers seemed to be in paying cue, + </p> + <p> + At length was forced, without restraint, to say, + </p> + <p> + The Lord commands that, till a future day, + </p> + <p> + You give us time to breathe:—so large the lot, + </p> + <p> + To serve for present we enough have got; + </p> + <p> + Too much the whole at once, but by degrees, + </p> + <p> + Your tithe we'll take and all contrive to please. + </p> + <p> + With us arrange the hour you would be here, + </p> + <p> + And some to-day:—to-morrow more we'll cheer; + </p> + <p> + The whole in order, and you'll clearly see, + </p> + <p> + That SOFTLY with FAIRLY best agree. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE sex inclined to follow this advice; + </p> + <p> + About receipts however they were not nice; + </p> + <p> + The entertainment greatly was admired, + </p> + <p> + And pure devotion all their bosoms fired, + </p> + <p> + A glass of cordial some apart received; + </p> + <p> + Good cheer was given, may be well believed; + </p> + <p> + Ten youthful dames brisk friar Fripart took, + </p> + <p> + Gay, airy, and engaging ev'ry look, + </p> + <p> + Who paid with pleasure all the monk could wish; + </p> + <p> + Some had fifteen:—some twelve to taste their dish; + </p> + <p> + Good friar Rock had twenty for his share, + </p> + <p> + And gave such satisfaction to the FAIR, + </p> + <p> + That some, to show they never grudged the price, + </p> + <p> + And proved their punctuality,—paid twice. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + So much indeed, that satiated with ways, + </p> + <p> + That six long months engaged their nights and days: + </p> + <p> + They gladly credit would have given now, + </p> + <p> + But found the ladies would not this allow, + </p> + <p> + Believing it most positively wrong, + </p> + <p> + To keep whate'er might to the church belong. + </p> + <p> + No tithe arrears were any where around, + </p> + <p> + So zealous were the dames in duty found, + </p> + <p> + They often in advance paid holy dues, + </p> + <p> + How pure the monks!—how just the ladies views! + </p> + <p> + The friars used despatch alone with those, + </p> + <p> + That for their fascinating charms they chose, + </p> + <p> + And sent the sempiternals to bestow, + </p> + <p> + The tribute they had brought on those below, + </p> + <p> + For in the refuse tithes that were their lot, + </p> + <p> + The laicks oft pleasant pickings got. + </p> + <p> + In short 'twas difficult to say, + </p> + <p> + What charity was shown from day to day. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IT happened that one night a married dame, + </p> + <p> + Desirous to convey the monks their claim, + </p> + <p> + And walking with her spouse just by the spot, + </p> + <p> + Where dwelled the arch contrivers of the plot, + </p> + <p> + Good Heavens! said she, I well remember now, + </p> + <p> + I've business with a friar here, I vow; + </p> + <p> + 'Twill presently be done if you'll but wait; + </p> + <p> + Religious duties we must ne'er abate. + </p> + <p> + What duties? cried the husband with surprise; + </p> + <p> + You're surely mad:—'tis midnight I surmise; + </p> + <p> + Confess yourself to-morrow if required; + </p> + <p> + The holy fathers are to bed retired. + </p> + <p> + That makes no difference, the lady cried.— + </p> + <p> + I think it does, the husband straight replied, + </p> + <p> + And thither I'll not let you go to-night:— + </p> + <p> + What heinous sins so terribly affright, + </p> + <p> + That in such haste the mind you wish to ease? + </p> + <p> + To-morrow morn repair whene'er you please: <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + YOU do me wrong, rejoined the charming fair; + </p> + <p> + I neither want confession nor a prayer, + </p> + <p> + But anxiously desire what is due to pay; + </p> + <p> + For if incautiously I should delay, + </p> + <p> + Long time 'would be ere I the monk should see, + </p> + <p> + With other matters he'll so busy be. + </p> + <p> + But what can you the holy fathers owe? + </p> + <p> + To which the lady said:—what don't you know? + </p> + <p> + A tithe, my dear, the friars always claim.— + </p> + <p> + What tithe? cried he; it surely has a name. + </p> + <p> + Not know! astonishingly, replied the wife.— + </p> + <p> + To which the husband answered:—On my life, + </p> + <p> + That women friars pay is very strange; + </p> + <p> + Will you particulars with me arrange? + </p> + <p> + How cunningly, said she, you seem to act; + </p> + <p> + Why clearly you're acquainted with the fact? + </p> + <p> + 'Tis Hymeneal works:—What works? cried he— + </p> + <p> + Lord! said the dame, assuredly you see, + </p> + <p> + Why I had paid an hour ago or more + </p> + <p> + And you've prevented me when at the door; + </p> + <p> + I'm sure, of those who owe, I'm not the worst, + </p> + <p> + For I, in paying, always was the first. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE husband quite astonished now appeared; + </p> + <p> + At once a hundred diff'rent ills he feared; + </p> + <p> + But questioning his wife howe'er, he found, + </p> + <p> + That many other dames who lived around, + </p> + <p> + Like her; in paying tithes, the monks obeyed, + </p> + <p> + Which consolation to his breast conveyed. + </p> + <p> + Poor innocent! she nothing wished to hide; + </p> + <p> + Said she, not one but tithe they make provide; + </p> + <p> + Good friar Aubrey takes your sister's dues; + </p> + <p> + To father Fabry Mrs. B's accrues; + </p> + <p> + The mayoress friar William likes to greet, + </p> + <p> + A monk more handsome scarcely you will meet; + </p> + <p> + And I to friar Gerard always go; + </p> + <p> + I wished this night to pay him all I owe. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ALAS! when tongues unbridled drop disguise, + </p> + <p> + What direful ills, what discords oft arise! + </p> + <p> + The cunning husband having thus obtained, + </p> + <p> + Particulars of what the fathers gained, + </p> + <p> + At first designed in secret to disclose, + </p> + <p> + Those scenes of fraud and matrimonial woes: + </p> + <p> + The mayor and citizens should know, he thought; + </p> + <p> + What dues were paid: what tithes the friars sought; + </p> + <p> + But since 'twas rather difficult to place, + </p> + <p> + Full credence, at the first, in such a case, + </p> + <p> + He judged it best to make the fellow speak, + </p> + <p> + To whom his wife had shown herself so weak. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20056m.jpg" alt="20056m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20056.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + FOR father Gerard in the morn he sent, + </p> + <p> + Who, unsuspecting, to the husband went, + </p> + <p> + When, in the presence of the injured wife, + </p> + <p> + He drew his sword and swore he'd take his life, + </p> + <p> + Unless the mystery he would disclose, + </p> + <p> + Which he reluctantly through terror chose. + </p> + <p> + Then having bound the friar hand and foot, + </p> + <p> + And in another room his lady put, + </p> + <p> + He sallied forth his hapless lot to tell, + </p> + <p> + And to the mayor exposed the wily spell; + </p> + <p> + The corporation next; then up and down, + </p> + <p> + The secret he divulged throughout the town. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A CRY for vengeance presently was heard; + </p> + <p> + The whole at once to slaughter, some preferred + </p> + <p> + While others would the place with fire surround, + </p> + <p> + And burn the house with those within it found. + </p> + <p> + Some wished to drown them, bound within their dress; + </p> + <p> + With various other projects you may guess; + </p> + <p> + But all agreed that death should be their lot, + </p> + <p> + And those for burning had most voices got. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20058m.jpg" alt="20058m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20058.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + WITHOUT delay they to the convent flew; + </p> + <p> + But when the holy mansion came in view, + </p> + <p> + Respect, the place of execution changed; + </p> + <p> + A citizen his barn for this arranged; + </p> + <p> + The crafty crew together were confined, + </p> + <p> + And in the blaze their wretched lives resigned, + </p> + <p> + While round the husbands danced at sound of drum, + </p> + <p> + And burnt whatever to their hands had come; + </p> + <p> + Naught 'scaped their fury, monks of all degrees, + </p> + <p> + Robes, mantles, capuchins, and mock decrees: + </p> + <p> + All perished properly within the flames; + </p> + <p> + But nothing more I find about the dames; + </p> + <p> + And friar Gerard, in another place, + </p> + <p> + Had met apart his merited disgrace. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Cradle" id="Cradle"></a>THE CRADLE + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20060m.jpg" alt="20060m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20060.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">N</span>EAR Rome, of yore, close to the Florence road, + </p> + <p> + Was seen a humble innkeeper's abode; + </p> + <p> + Small sums were charged; few guests the night would stay; + </p> + <p> + And these could seldom much afford to pay. + </p> + <p> + A pleasing active partner had the host + </p> + <p> + Her age not much 'bove thirty at the most; + </p> + <p> + Two children she her loving husband bore; + </p> + <p> + The boy was one year old: the daughter more; + </p> + <p> + Just fifteen summers o'er her form had smiled; + </p> + <p> + In person charming, and in temper mild. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IT happened that Pinucio, young and gay, + </p> + <p> + A youth of family, oft passed the way, + </p> + <p> + Admired the girl, and thought she might be gained, + </p> + <p> + Attentions showed, and like return obtained; + </p> + <p> + The mistress was not deaf, nor lover mute; + </p> + <p> + Pinucio seemed the lady's taste to suit, + </p> + <p> + Of pleasing person and engaging air; + </p> + <p> + And 'mong the equals of our youthful fair, + </p> + <p> + As yet, not one a pref'rence had received; + </p> + <p> + Nor had she e'er in golden dreams believed; + </p> + <p> + But, spite of tender years, her mind was high, + </p> + <p> + And village lads she would not let come nigh. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + COLUTTA, (such her name,) though much admired; + </p> + <p> + And many in the place her hand desired, + </p> + <p> + Rejected some, and others would not take, + </p> + <p> + And this most clearly for Pinucio's sake. + </p> + <p> + Long conversations she could rarely get, + </p> + <p> + And various obstacles the lovers met; + </p> + <p> + No interviews where they might be at ease, + </p> + <p> + But ev'ry thing conspired to fret and teaze. + </p> + <p> + O parents, husbands! be advised by me; + </p> + <p> + Constraint with wives or children won't agree; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis then the god of love exerts his art, + </p> + <p> + To find admittance to the throbbing heart. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + PINUCIO and a friend, one stormy night, + </p> + <p> + The landlord's reached and would in haste alight; + </p> + <p> + They asked for beds, but were too late they found: + </p> + <p> + You know, sir, cried the host, we don't abound; + </p> + <p> + And now the very garrets we have let: + </p> + <p> + You'd better elsewhere try your wish to get, + </p> + <p> + And spite of weather, further on pursue + </p> + <p> + At best, our lodging is unfit for you. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HAVE you no truckle bed? the lover cried; + </p> + <p> + No corner left?—we fain would here abide: + </p> + <p> + Why, truly, said the host, we always keep + </p> + <p> + Two beds within the chamber where we sleep; + </p> + <p> + My wife and I, of course, take one of these; + </p> + <p> + Together lie in t'other if you please. + </p> + <p> + The spark replied, this we will gladly do; + </p> + <p> + Come, supper get; that o'er, the friends withdrew: + </p> + <p> + Pinucio, by Coletta's sage advice, + </p> + <p> + In looking o'er the room was very nice; + </p> + <p> + With eagle-eyes particulars he traced, + </p> + <p> + Then 'tween the clothes himself and friend he placed. + </p> + <p> + A camp-bed for the girl was on the floor; + </p> + <p> + The landlord's, 'gainst the wall and next the door; + </p> + <p> + Another opposite the last was set, + </p> + <p> + And this, to guests, at certain times was let; + </p> + <p> + And 'tween the two, but near the parents' best, + </p> + <p> + A cradle for the child to rest its head, + </p> + <p> + From which a pleasant accident arrived, + </p> + <p> + That our gallant's young friend of rest deprived. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN midnight came, and this gay spark supposed + </p> + <p> + The host and hostess' eyes in sleep were closed, + </p> + <p> + Convinced the time appointed was at hand, + </p> + <p> + To put in execution what was planned, + </p> + <p> + He to the camp-bed silently repaired, + </p> + <p> + And found the belle by Morpheus not insnared; + </p> + <p> + Coletta taught a play that mortals find + </p> + <p> + Fatigues the body more than plagues the mind: + </p> + <p> + A truce succeeded, but 'twas quickly o'er: + </p> + <p> + Those rest not long who pilfer Cupid's store. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AGAIN, when to the room the hostess came, + </p> + <p> + And found the cradle rested not the same, + </p> + <p> + Good heav'ns! cried she, it joins my husband's head: + </p> + <p> + And, but for that, I truly had been led + </p> + <p> + To lay myself unthinkingly beside + </p> + <p> + The strangers whom with lodging we provide; + </p> + <p> + But, God be praised, this cradle shows the place + </p> + <p> + Where my good husband's pillow I must trace. + </p> + <p> + This said, she with the friend was quickly laid, + </p> + <p> + Without suspecting what mistake she'd made. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BETWEEN the lovers all was blithe and gay, + </p> + <p> + When suddenly the friend, though far from day, + </p> + <p> + Was forced to rise ('twas plain a pressing case,) + </p> + <p> + And move the infant's cradle from its place, + </p> + <p> + To ope the door, and lest he noise might make, + </p> + <p> + Or any way by chance the child should wake, + </p> + <p> + He set it carefully beside his bed, + </p> + <p> + And (softly treading) to the garden sped. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ON his return he passed the cradle by; + </p> + <p> + To place it as before he would not try, + </p> + <p> + But went to sleep; when presently a sound, + </p> + <p> + From something that had tumbled, rang around, + </p> + <p> + Awoke his wife, who ran below, + </p> + <p> + That what had happened she might clearly know. + </p> + <p> + No fool in such adventures was our Wight: + </p> + <p> + The opportunity he would not slight, + </p> + <p> + But played the husband well: no, no, I'm wrong; + </p> + <p> + He played it ill:—too oft, too much, too long; + </p> + <p> + For whosoe'er would wish to do it well, + </p> + <p> + Should softly go:—the gentle most excel. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IN truth, the wife was quite surprised to find + </p> + <p> + Her spouse so much to frolicking inclined; + </p> + <p> + Said she, what ails the man, he's grown so gay? + </p> + <p> + A lad of twenty's not more fond of play. + </p> + <p> + Well! let's enjoy the moments while we can; + </p> + <p> + God's will be done, since life is but a span! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE words were scarcely said, when our gallant + </p> + <p> + Renewed his fun, and nothing seemed to want; + </p> + <p> + Indeed, the hostess still her charms possessed, + </p> + <p> + And, on occasion, well might be caressed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + MEANWHILE Coletta, dreading a surprise, + </p> + <p> + Prevailed upon her paramour to rise; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas nearly break of day when he withdrew, + </p> + <p> + But, groping to his place the way anew, + </p> + <p> + Pinucio, by the cradle too, was led + </p> + <p> + To miss his friend's and take the landlord's bed. + </p> + <p> + No sooner in than with an under voice, + </p> + <p> + (Intriguers oft too eagerly rejoice,) + </p> + <p> + Said he, my friend, I wish I could relate + </p> + <p> + The pleasure I've received; my bliss is great; + </p> + <p> + To you, I'm sorry, Fortune proves so cold; + </p> + <p> + Like happiness I'd fain in you behold; + </p> + <p> + Coletta is a morsel for a king; + </p> + <p> + Inestimable girl!—to me she'll cling. + </p> + <p> + I've many seen, but such a charming fair, + </p> + <p> + There's not another like her any where. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WITH softest skin, delightful form and mien; + </p> + <p> + Her ev'ry act resembles BEAUTY's queen; + </p> + <p> + In short, before we'd ended with our fun, + </p> + <p> + Six posts (without a fiction) we had run. + </p> + <p> + The host was struck with what the spark averred, + </p> + <p> + And muttered something indistinctly heard. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE hostess whispered HIM she thought her spouse:— + </p> + <p> + Again, my dear, such sparks let's never house; + </p> + <p> + Pray don't you hear how they together chat?— + </p> + <p> + Just then the husband raised himself and sat; + </p> + <p> + Is this your plan? said he with mighty rage; + </p> + <p> + Was it for THIS you would my house engage? + </p> + <p> + You understand me, but I'll seek redress; + </p> + <p> + Think you so very cheap to have success? + </p> + <p> + What, would you ruin families at will, + </p> + <p> + And with our daughters take at ease your fill? + </p> + <p> + Away, I say! my house this moment quit; + </p> + <p> + And as for You, abominable chit, + </p> + <p> + I'll have your life: this hour you breathe your last; + </p> + <p> + Such creatures only can with beasts be classed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + PINUCIO heard the lecture with dismay, + </p> + <p> + At once was mute, and grew as cold as clay; + </p> + <p> + A moment's silence through the room prevailed; + </p> + <p> + Coletta trembled, and her lot bewailed. + </p> + <p> + The hostess now, on ev'ry side perceived + </p> + <p> + Her peril great, and for the error grieved. + </p> + <p> + The friend, howe'er, the cradle called to mind, + </p> + <p> + Which caused the many ills we've seen combined, + </p> + <p> + And instantly he cried:—Pinucio! strange + </p> + <p> + You thus allow yourself about to range; + </p> + <p> + Did I not tell you when the wine you took, + </p> + <p> + 'Twould make many sad misfortunes hook? + </p> + <p> + Whene'er you freely drink, 'tis known fall well, + </p> + <p> + Your sleep's disturbed, you walk, and nonsense tell. + </p> + <p> + Come, come to bed: the morning soon will peep; + </p> + <p> + Pinucio took the hint, pretended sleep, + </p> + <p> + And carried on so artfully the wile, + </p> + <p> + The husband no suspicion had of guile. + </p> + <p> + The stratagem our hostess likewise tried, + </p> + <p> + And to her daughter's bed in silence hied, + </p> + <p> + Where she conceived her fortress was so strong, + </p> + <p> + She presently began to use her tongue, + </p> + <p> + And cried aloud:—Impossible the fact; + </p> + <p> + Such things he could not with Coletta act; + </p> + <p> + I've with her been in bed throughout the night, + </p> + <p> + And she, no more than I, has swerved from right; + </p> + <p> + 'Twere mighty pretty, truly, here to come; + </p> + <p> + At this the host a little while was dumb; + </p> + <p> + But in a lower tone at length replied + </p> + <p> + I nought with your account I'm satisfied. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE party rose; the titter circled round; + </p> + <p> + And each sufficient reason for it found; + </p> + <p> + The whole was secret, and whoe'er had gained, + </p> + <p> + With care upon the subject mute remained. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="St._Julian" id="St._Julian"></a>ST. JULIAN'S PRAYER + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20071m.jpg" alt="20071m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20071.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">T</span>O charms and philters, secret spells and prayers, + </p> + <p> + How many round attribute all their cares! + </p> + <p> + In these howe'er I never can believe, + </p> + <p> + And laugh at follies that so much deceive. + </p> + <p> + Yet with the beauteous FAIR, 'tis very true, + </p> + <p> + These WORDS, as SACRED VIRTUES, oft they view; + </p> + <p> + The spell and philter wonders work in love + </p> + <p> + Hearts melt with charms supposed from pow'rs above! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + MY aim is now to have recourse to these, + </p> + <p> + And give a story that I trust will please, + </p> + <p> + In which Saint Julian's prayer, to Reynold D'Ast, + </p> + <p> + Produced a benefit, good fortune classed. + </p> + <p> + Had he neglected to repeat the charm, + </p> + <p> + Believed so thoroughly to guard from harm, + </p> + <p> + He would have found his cash accounts not right, + </p> + <p> + And passed assuredly a wretched night. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ONE day, to William's castle as he moved. + </p> + <p> + Three men, whose looks he very much approved, + </p> + <p> + And thought such honest fellows he had round, + </p> + <p> + Their like could nowhere be discovered round; + </p> + <p> + Without suspecting any thing was wrong, + </p> + <p> + The three, with complaisance and fluent tongue, + </p> + <p> + Saluted him in humble servile style, + </p> + <p> + And asked, (the minutes better to beguile,) + </p> + <p> + If they might bear him company the way; + </p> + <p> + The honour would be great, and no delay; + </p> + <p> + Besides, in travelling 'tis safer found, + </p> + <p> + And far more pleasant, when the party's round; + </p> + <p> + So many robbers through the province range, + </p> + <p> + (Continued they) 'tis wonderfully strange, + </p> + <p> + The prince should not these villains more restrain; + </p> + <p> + But there:—bad MEN will somewhere still remain. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TO their proposal Reynold soon agreed, + </p> + <p> + And they resolved together to proceed. + </p> + <p> + When 'bout a league the travellers had moved, + </p> + <p> + Discussing freely, as they all approved, + </p> + <p> + The conversation turned on spells and prayer, + </p> + <p> + Their pow'r o'er worms of earth, or birds of air; + </p> + <p> + To charm the wolf, or guard from thunder's roar, + </p> + <p> + And many wonderful achievements more; + </p> + <p> + Besides the cures a prayer would oft produce; + </p> + <p> + To man and beast it proves of sov'reign use, + </p> + <p> + Far greater than from doctors e'er you'll view, + </p> + <p> + Who, with their Latin, make so much ado. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IN turn, the three pretended knowledge great, + </p> + <p> + And mystick facts affected to relate, + </p> + <p> + While Reynold silently attention paid + </p> + <p> + To all the words the honest fellows said:— + </p> + <p> + Possess you not, said one, some secret prayer + </p> + <p> + To bring you aid, when dangers round you stare? + </p> + <p> + To this our Reynold seriously replied, + </p> + <p> + Myself, on secret spells, I do not pride; + </p> + <p> + But still some WORDS I have that I repeat, + </p> + <p> + Each morn I travel, that I may not meet + </p> + <p> + A horrid lodging where I stop at night; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis called SAINT JULIAN'S PRAYER that I recite, + </p> + <p> + And truly I have found, that when I fail + </p> + <p> + To say this prayer, I've reason to bewail. + </p> + <p> + But rarely I neglect so good a thing, + </p> + <p> + That ills averts, and may such blessings bring. + </p> + <p> + And have you clearly said it, sir, to day? + </p> + <p> + Cried one of those he met upon his way. + </p> + <p> + Yes, Reynold answered. Well, replied the Wight; + </p> + <p> + I'll wage, I'm better lodged than you to-night. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + 'TWAS very cold, and darkness 'gan to peep; + </p> + <p> + The place was distant yet, where they might sleep. + </p> + <p> + Perhaps, said Reynold, 'tis your usual care, + </p> + <p> + In travelling, to say, like me, this prayer. + </p> + <p> + Not so, the other cried, to you I vow, + </p> + <p> + Invoking saints is not my practice now; + </p> + <p> + But should I lose, thenceforth I'll them address.— + </p> + <p> + Said Reynold, readily I acquiesce; + </p> + <p> + My life I'd venture, should you to an inn, + </p> + <p> + For, in the town, I've neither friend nor kin, + </p> + <p> + And, if you like, we'll this exception make. + </p> + <p> + The other answered: Well, the bet I'll take; + </p> + <p> + Your horse and coat against my purse you wage, + </p> + <p> + And, sure of gaining, readily engage. + </p> + <p> + Our Wight might then have thoroughly perceived, + </p> + <p> + His horse was lost—no chance to be relieved. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BESIDE a wood, as on the party moved, + </p> + <p> + The one, who betting had so much approved, + </p> + <p> + Now changed his tone, and in a surly way, + </p> + <p> + Exclaimed:—Alight—you'll find it time to pray; + </p> + <p> + Let me apprize you, distant is the place, + </p> + <p> + And much you'll need Saint Julian's special grace. + </p> + <p> + Come off, I tell you:—instantly they took + </p> + <p> + His purse, horse, clothes, and all their hands could hook + </p> + <p> + E'en seized his boots, and said with subtle sneer, + </p> + <p> + Your feet, by walking, won't the worse appear; + </p> + <p> + Then sought a diff'rent road by rapid flight, + </p> + <p> + And, presently the knaves were out of sight; + </p> + <p> + While Reynold still with stockings, drawers, and shirt, + </p> + <p> + But wet to skin, and covered o'er with dirt: + </p> + <p> + (The wind north-east in front—as cold as clay;) + </p> + <p> + In doleful dumps proceeded on his way, + </p> + <p> + And justly feared, that spite of faith and prayer, + </p> + <p> + He now should meet, at night, with wretched fare. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HOWEVER, some pleasing hopes he still had yet, + </p> + <p> + That, from his cloak-bag, he some clothes might get; + </p> + <p> + For, we should note, a servant he had brought, + </p> + <p> + Who in the neighbourhood a farrier sought. + </p> + <p> + To set a shoe upon his horse, and then + </p> + <p> + Should join his master on the road agen; + </p> + <p> + But that, as we shall find, was not the case, + </p> + <p> + And Reynold's dire misfortune thence we trace. + </p> + <p> + In fact, the fellow, worthless we'll suppose, + </p> + <p> + Had viewed from far what accidents arose, + </p> + <p> + Then turned aside, his safety to secure, + </p> + <p> + And left his master dangers to endure; + </p> + <p> + So steadily be kept upon the trot, + </p> + <p> + To Castle-William, ere 'twas night, he got, + </p> + <p> + And took the inn which had the most renown; + </p> + <p> + For fare and furniture within the town, + </p> + <p> + There waited Reynold's coming at his ease, + </p> + <p> + With fire and cheer that could not fail to please. + </p> + <p> + His master, up to neck in dirt and wet, + </p> + <p> + Had num'rous difficulties o'er to get; + </p> + <p> + And when the snow, in flakes obscured the air, + </p> + <p> + With piercing cold and winds, he felt despair; + </p> + <p> + Such ills he bore, that hanging might be thought + </p> + <p> + A bed of roses rather to be sought. + </p> + <p> + CHANCE so arranges ev'ry thing around + </p> + <p> + ALL good, or ALL that's bad is solely found; + </p> + <p> + When favours flow the numbers are so great, + </p> + <p> + That ev'ry wish upon us seems to wait; + </p> + <p> + But, if disposed, misfortunes to bestow; + </p> + <p> + No ills forgot: each poignant pang we know. + </p> + <p> + In proof, attend my friends, this very night, + </p> + <p> + The sad adventures that befell our wight, + </p> + <p> + Who, Castle-William did not reach till late, + </p> + <p> + When they, an hour or more, had shut the gate. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT length our traveller approached the wall, + </p> + <p> + And, somehow to the foot contrived to crawl; + </p> + <p> + A roofed projection fortune led him near, + </p> + <p> + That joined a house, and 'gan his heart to cheer. + </p> + <p> + Delighted with the change he now had got, + </p> + <p> + He placed himself upon the sheltered spot; + </p> + <p> + A lucky hit but seldom comes alone; + </p> + <p> + Some straw, by chance, was near the mansion thrown, + </p> + <p> + Which Reynold 'neath the jutting penthouse placed + </p> + <p> + There, God be praised, cried he, a bed I've traced. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + MEANWHILE, the storm from ev'ry quarter pressed; + </p> + <p> + Our traveller was soon to death distressed; + </p> + <p> + With cold benumbed; by fell despair o'erspread; + </p> + <p> + He trembled, groaned:—teeth chattered in his head; + </p> + <p> + So loud his plaints, at length they reached the ear + </p> + <p> + Of one who dwelled within the mansion near: + </p> + <p> + A servant girl; her mistress brisk and gay: + </p> + <p> + A youthful widow, charming as the day; + </p> + <p> + The governor she privately received: + </p> + <p> + A noble marquis, who her cares relieved. + </p> + <p> + Oft interrupted when he sought the fair, + </p> + <p> + And wished at ease her company to share; + </p> + <p> + Desirous too of passing quite unknown, + </p> + <p> + A private door he presently was shown, + </p> + <p> + That opened to the fields, and gave access: + </p> + <p> + Through this he visited with such address, + </p> + <p> + That none within the town his commerce viewed, + </p> + <p> + Nor e'en a servant's eye his course pursued. + </p> + <p> + Surprise I feel, since pleasures of the mind, + </p> + <p> + Apparently were not for lords designed; + </p> + <p> + More pleased they seem when made the talk around + </p> + <p> + And soft amours divulged, delights are found. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IT happened that the night our Job arrived, + </p> + <p> + And, stretched on straw, misfortune just survived, + </p> + <p> + The lady thought her fond gallant to see, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry moment hoped with him to be. + </p> + <p> + The supper ready, and the room prepared, + </p> + <p> + Each rarity was served: no trouble spared; + </p> + <p> + Baths, perfumes, wines, most exquisite, in place, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry thing around displaying grace, + </p> + <p> + With Cupid's whole artillery in view, + </p> + <p> + Not his, who would with sighs alone pursue, + </p> + <p> + But that kind god who always favour shows, + </p> + <p> + The source of happiness, whence pleasure flows. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + MEANWHILE, however, while thus the lady sought. + </p> + <p> + By ev'ry charm to please, a note was brought; + </p> + <p> + A page conveyed it, by the marquis sent, + </p> + <p> + To say his coming business would prevent. + </p> + <p> + The disappointment doubtless was severe, + </p> + <p> + But consolation certainly was near; + </p> + <p> + It proved to Reynold wonderfully kind, + </p> + <p> + For scarcely had our traveller resigned, + </p> + <p> + And groaned aloud, but, tender as her dame, + </p> + <p> + In haste the confidential servant came, + </p> + <p> + And to the widow said:—I hear below + </p> + <p> + Some poor unfortunate o'ercome with woe; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis piercing cold, and he perhaps will die + </p> + <p> + Some place, pray grant, where he to-night may lie. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + MOST readily, replied the courteous fair, + </p> + <p> + We never use the garret:—lodge him there; + </p> + <p> + Some straw upon a couch will make a bed, + </p> + <p> + On which the wand'rer may repose his head; + </p> + <p> + Shut well the door, but first provide some meat, + </p> + <p> + And then permit him thither to retreat. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WITHOUT this timely help 'twas clear our wight + </p> + <p> + Had ne'er survived the horrors of the night; + </p> + <p> + The door was ope'd, and Reynold blessed the hand + </p> + <p> + That gave relief, and stopt life's ebbing sand. + </p> + <p> + His tale he told; got spirits, strength, and ease; + </p> + <p> + In person tall, well made, and formed to please, + </p> + <p> + He looked not like a novice in amour, + </p> + <p> + Though young, and seeking shelter at a door. + </p> + <p> + His want of dress and miserable state + </p> + <p> + Raised shame indeed, and showed distress was great. + </p> + <p> + Though LOVE be seen in Nature's pure array, + </p> + <p> + No dirt appears, however you survey. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS servant girl now hastened to the fair, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry circumstance detailed with care. + </p> + <p> + See, said the lady, if within the press + </p> + <p> + There be not clothes to furnish him a dress; + </p> + <p> + My husband, now no more, must some have left; + </p> + <p> + Yes, said the girl, you're not of them bereft, + </p> + <p> + I recollect his wardrobe did abound; + </p> + <p> + And presently a handsome suit she found. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + MEANWHILE the lady having learned the name + </p> + <p> + Of Reynold D'Ast, his quality and fame, + </p> + <p> + (Himself it seems particulars detailed, + </p> + <p> + While all around his suff'rings keen bewailed,) + </p> + <p> + Her orders gave, the bath for her prepared + </p> + <p> + Should now receive the man her care had spared. + </p> + <p> + Unasked, the stranger this attention got, + </p> + <p> + And well perfumed ere clothes they would allot. + </p> + <p> + When dressed, he waited on the widow fair, + </p> + <p> + And paid his compliments with graceful air. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE supper (for the marquis first designed) + </p> + <p> + At length was served with taste the most refined. + </p> + <p> + Our trav'ller glad, an appetite displayed; + </p> + <p> + The lady carefully her guest surveyed, + </p> + <p> + And anxious seemed to gratify his wish, + </p> + <p> + By helping what appeared his favourite dish. + </p> + <p> + Already, perhaps, she felt a Cupid's dart, + </p> + <p> + And in her throbbing bosom knew the smart; + </p> + <p> + Or sympathy, or pity for his woes, + </p> + <p> + Might touch the spring whence softest passion flows. + </p> + <p> + On ev'ry side assailed the youthful dame + </p> + <p> + Herself surrendered unto Cupid's flame. + </p> + <p> + Should I give way, said she, who'll tell the tale? + </p> + <p> + No risk is run if secrecy prevail. + </p> + <p> + The marquis merits to be played the trick; + </p> + <p> + He no excuse can have, unless he's sick. + </p> + <p> + One sin against another I may weigh, + </p> + <p> + And man for man will equally repay. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SO inexperienced Reynold was not found, + </p> + <p> + But that he saw how things were going round, + </p> + <p> + And, that Saint Julian's Prayer would yet succeed, + </p> + <p> + To give him all the lodging he might need. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE supper o'er, our couple left alone, + </p> + <p> + What fairer field could truly have been shown? + </p> + <p> + The belle now wore a smart becoming dress, + </p> + <p> + Designed, in ev'ry view, to prepossess. + </p> + <p> + 'Twas NEGLIGENCE, so requisite to please + </p> + <p> + And fascinate, with airy, careless ease, + </p> + <p> + According to the taste which I pursue, + </p> + <p> + That made her charms so exquisite to view. + </p> + <p> + No gaudy tinsel: all was flowing light; + </p> + <p> + Though not superb, yet pleasing to the sight; + </p> + <p> + A neckerchief, where much should be concealed, + </p> + <p> + Was made so narrow,—beauties half revealed; + </p> + <p> + Beneath is shade—what words can ne'er express; + </p> + <p> + And Reynold saw enough the rest to guess. + </p> + <p> + No more I say; the belle indeed was fair, + </p> + <p> + Possessed of youth and all engaging air; + </p> + <p> + Tall, nicely formed; each grace, that hearts could win; + </p> + <p> + Not much of fat, nor yet appeared too thin. + </p> + <p> + Emotion, at the view, who would not feel? + </p> + <p> + To soft delight what bosom proves of steel? + </p> + <p> + No marble bust, philosopher, nor stone, + </p> + <p> + But similar sensation would have shown. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20083m.jpg" alt="20083m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20083.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + THE silence first was broken by the dame; + </p> + <p> + Who spoke so freely, Reynold bolder came. + </p> + <p> + He knew not well, howe'er, discourse to find; + </p> + <p> + To help him out the widow was inclined; + </p> + <p> + Said she, you much remind me of a friend, + </p> + <p> + Whose ev'ry wish I sought with mine to blend + </p> + <p> + My husband (rest his soul!) had just those eyes, + </p> + <p> + That look, air, mouth:—the very height and size: + </p> + <p> + You greatly honour me, the spark replied: + </p> + <p> + Your charms howe'er might well have been his pride; + </p> + <p> + I ne'er beheld such soft engaging mien: + </p> + <p> + On earth, like beauty never yet was seen. + </p> + <p> + But, in extremes to be, appears my lot; + </p> + <p> + Just now I felt quite chilled:—at present hot; + </p> + <p> + Pray tell me which is best? The fair looked down, + </p> + <p> + And humbly seemed to wave the proffered crown, + </p> + <p> + That she might still more flattery receive + </p> + <p> + Address not small, if we'll our eyes believe. + </p> + <p> + The swain now praised each charm within his view, + </p> + <p> + And whatsoe'er his wishes could pursue; + </p> + <p> + Where hope was strong, and expectation high, + </p> + <p> + She would not long be cruel and deny. + </p> + <p> + To give the praise, your due, the lover cried, + </p> + <p> + And note the beauties that my heart divide, + </p> + <p> + 'Twould take an age, and I've a single night, + </p> + <p> + Which surely might be passed with more delight. + </p> + <p> + The widow smiled; enough it seems was said; + </p> + <p> + And Reynold shortened—what to nothing led. + </p> + <p> + In war or love, time equally is dear; + </p> + <p> + More happy than our spark none could appear; + </p> + <p> + No point but what he gained; the smiling dame + </p> + <p> + Resistance only showed to raise the flame; + </p> + <p> + Nor more nor less; each belle like art has got, + </p> + <p> + And practises at will, or maid or not. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BUT truly, it was never my intent + </p> + <p> + To count each favour she to Reynold lent; + </p> + <p> + Particulars exact of ev'ry kiss, + </p> + <p> + And all the preludes incident to bliss; + </p> + <p> + Both, doubtless, knew more ways than one to please; + </p> + <p> + And sought, with anxious care, love's charms to seize. + </p> + <p> + On recollection of the wretched state + </p> + <p> + In which our traveller had moved of late, + </p> + <p> + Some favour was bestowed:—there, cried the dame, + </p> + <p> + Is something to repay the road you came; + </p> + <p> + This for the cold; that fear; there thieves disgraced; + </p> + <p> + So, one by one, the whole was soon effaced. + </p> + <p> + In this way to be paid for ills we meet, + </p> + <p> + Who'd not be satisfied with boons so sweet? + </p> + <p> + And we conclude, that Reynold on the spot, + </p> + <p> + Love's am'rous recompense of pleasures got. + </p> + <p> + Now easy conversation was renewed; + </p> + <p> + Then mutual kisses; ev'ry sweet pursued. + </p> + <p> + 'Twas time for bed; howe'er, the widow fair + </p> + <p> + Determined that her own the spark should share; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas prudent, doubtless; like a lady wise; + </p> + <p> + Gallantly done: one room would well suffice. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20089m.jpg" alt="20089m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20089.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + WHAT further passed betwixt the pair that night; + </p> + <p> + I cannot say, though we'll believe 'twas right; + </p> + <p> + Between the clothes when laid, and unrestrained, + </p> + <p> + Most clearly, Reynold all his wishes gained. + </p> + <p> + There he was recompensed for ev'ry grief; + </p> + <p> + The lady too, received so much relief, + </p> + <p> + That she desired his company again, + </p> + <p> + But still these visits secrets should remain; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas requisite the governor to see; + </p> + <p> + Howe'er the dame delighted seemed to be, + </p> + <p> + And not content with what she had bestowed, + </p> + <p> + A purse well stored with gold to Reynold showed: + </p> + <p> + He took no more, indeed, than what would pay + </p> + <p> + The bare expenses on his homeward way; + </p> + <p> + Then sought the street that to the tavern led, + </p> + <p> + Where still his lazy servant was in bed; + </p> + <p> + The fellow mauled; then changed throughout his dress; + </p> + <p> + Since to the cloak-bag now he had access. + </p> + <p> + His fortune to complete, that day they took + </p> + <p> + The very wretches that he wished to hook. + </p> + <p> + He to the judge repaired with ev'ry haste; + </p> + <p> + In such a case you never time should waste; + </p> + <p> + For, once the things are into court received, + </p> + <p> + 'Tis like the lion's den: naught e'er 's retrieved; + </p> + <p> + Their hands are closed, not 'gainst what may be brought + </p> + <p> + But to secure what from their grasp is sought. + </p> + <p> + Who seeks redress by law, facts oft have shown, + </p> + <p> + May bless his stars if he but keep his own. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE trial o'er, a gallows treble-faced, + </p> + <p> + Was, for their swinging, in the market placed, + </p> + <p> + ONE of the three harangued the mob around, + </p> + <p> + (His speech was for the others also found) + </p> + <p> + Then, 'bout their necks the halters being tied, + </p> + <p> + Repentant and confessed the culprits died. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHO, after this, will doubt the pow'r of prayers? + </p> + <p> + These silly knaves had banished all their cares; + </p> + <p> + And when at ease they thought to skip and prance, + </p> + <p> + Were seized and quickly taught another dance. + </p> + <p> + On t'other hand, where dire distress prevailed, + </p> + <p> + And death, in various ways, our spark assailed, + </p> + <p> + A beauty suddenly his senses charmed, + </p> + <p> + Who might a prelate's bosom have alarmed. + </p> + <p> + So truly fortunate, indeed, his lot, + </p> + <p> + Again his money, baggage, horse he got; + </p> + <p> + And, thank Saint Julian, howsoever tossed, + </p> + <p> + He passed a blissful night that nothing cost. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + + <p> + <a name="p53b" id="p53b"></a><img alt="p53b.jpg (59K)" + src="images/p53b.jpg" height="517" width="674" /> + </p> + + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Countryman_Who" id="Countryman_Who"></a>THE COUNTRYMAN WHO + SOUGHT HIS CALF + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20091m.jpg" alt="20091m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20091.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20095m.jpg" alt="20095m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20095.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">A</span> COUNTRYMAN, one day, his calf had lost, + </p> + <p> + And, seeking it, a neighbouring forest crossed; + </p> + <p> + The tallest tree that in the district grew, + </p> + <p> + He climbed to get a more extensive view. + </p> + <p> + Just then a lady with her lover came; + </p> + <p> + The place was pleasing, both to spark and dame; + </p> + <p> + Their mutual wishes, looks and eyes expressed, + </p> + <p> + And on the grass the lady was caressed. + </p> + <p> + At sights of charms, enchanting to the eyes, + </p> + <p> + The gay gallant exclaimed, with fond surprise:— + </p> + <p> + Ye gods, what striking beauties now I see! + </p> + <p> + No objects named; but spoke with anxious glee. + </p> + <p> + The clod, who, on the tree had mounted high, + </p> + <p> + And heard at ease the conversation nigh, + </p> + <p> + Now cried:—Good man! who see with such delight; + </p> + <p> + Pray tell me if my calf be in your sight? <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Hans_Carvel" id="Hans_Carvel"></a>HANS CARVEL'S RING + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20097m.jpg" alt="20097m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20097.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">H</span>ANS CARVEL took, when weak and late in life; + </p> + <p> + A girl, with youth and beauteous charms to wife; + </p> + <p> + And with her, num'rous troubles, cares and fears; + </p> + <p> + For, scarcely one without the rest appears. + </p> + <p> + Bab (such her name, and daughter of a knight) + </p> + <p> + Was airy, buxom: formed for am'rous fight. + </p> + <p> + Hans, holding jeers and cuckoldom in dread, + </p> + <p> + Would have his precious rib with caution tread, + </p> + <p> + And nothing but the Bible e'er peruse; + </p> + <p> + All other books he daily would abuse; + </p> + <p> + Blamed secret visits; frowned at loose attire; + </p> + <p> + And censured ev'ry thing gallants admire. + </p> + <p> + The dame, howe'er, was deaf to all he said; + </p> + <p> + No preaching pleased but what to pleasure led, + </p> + <p> + Which made the aged husband hold his tongue. + </p> + <p> + And wish for death, since all round went wrong. + </p> + <p> + Some easy moments he perhaps might get; + </p> + <p> + A full detail in hist'ry's page is met. + </p> + <p> + One night, when company he'd had to dine, + </p> + <p> + And pretty well was fill'd with gen'rous wine, + </p> + <p> + Hans dreamed, as near his wife he snoring lay, + </p> + <p> + The devil came his compliments to pay, + </p> + <p> + And having on his finger put a ring, + </p> + <p> + Said he, friend Hans, I know thou feel'st a sting; + </p> + <p> + Thy trouble 's great: I pity much thy case; + </p> + <p> + Let but this ring, howe'er, thy finger grace, + </p> + <p> + And while 'tis there I'll answer with my head, + </p> + <p> + THAT ne'er shall happen which is now thy dread: + </p> + <p> + Hans, quite delighted, forced his finger through; + </p> + <p> + You drunken beast, cried Bab, what would you do? + </p> + <p> + To love's devoirs quite lost, you take no care, + </p> + <p> + And now have thrust your finger God knows where! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Hermit" id="Hermit"></a>THE HERMIT + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20101m.jpg" alt="20101m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20101.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">W</span>HEN Venus and Hypocrisy combine, + </p> + <p> + Oft pranks are played that show a deep design; + </p> + <p> + Men are but men, and friars full as weak: + </p> + <p> + I'm not by Envy moved these truths to speak. + </p> + <p> + Have you a sister, daughter, pretty wife? + </p> + <p> + Beware the monks as you would guard your life; + </p> + <p> + If in their snares a simple belle be caught: + </p> + <p> + The trap succeeds: to ruin she is brought. + </p> + <p> + To show that monks are knaves in Virtue's mask; + </p> + <p> + Pray read my tale:—no other proof I ask. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A HERMIT, full of youth, was thought around, + </p> + <p> + A saint, and worthy of the legend found. + </p> + <p> + The holy man a knotted cincture wore; + </p> + <p> + But, 'neath his garb:—heart-rotten to the core. + </p> + <p> + A chaplet from his twisted girdle hung, + </p> + <p> + Of size extreme, and regularly strung, + </p> + <p> + On t'other side was worn a little bell; + </p> + <p> + The hypocrite in ALL, he acted well; + </p> + <p> + And if a female near his cell appeared, + </p> + <p> + He'd keep within as if the sex he feared, + </p> + <p> + With downcast eyes and looks of woe complete, + </p> + <p> + You'd ne'er suppose that butter he could eat. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NOT far from where the hermit's cell was placed, + </p> + <p> + Within a village dwelled a widow chaste; + </p> + <p> + Her residence was at the further end + </p> + <p> + And all her store—a daughter as a friend, + </p> + <p> + Who candour, youth, and charms supreme possessed; + </p> + <p> + And still a virgin lived, howe'er distressed. + </p> + <p> + Though if the real truth perhaps we name, + </p> + <p> + 'Twas more simplicity than virtuous aim; + </p> + <p> + Not much of industry, but honest heart; + </p> + <p> + No wealth, nor lovers, who might hope impart. + </p> + <p> + In Adam's days, when all with clothes were born, + </p> + <p> + She doubtless might like finery have worn; + </p> + <p> + A house was furnished then without expense; + </p> + <p> + For sheets or mattresses you'd no pretence; + </p> + <p> + Not e'en a bed was necessary thought + </p> + <p> + No blankets, pillowbiers, nor quilts were bought. + </p> + <p> + Those times are o'er; then Hymen came alone; + </p> + <p> + But now a lawyer in his train is shown. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR anchorite, in begging through the place; + </p> + <p> + This girl beheld,—but not with eyes of grace. + </p> + <p> + Said he, she'll do, and, if thou manag'st right, + </p> + <p> + Lucius, at times, with her to pass the night. + </p> + <p> + No time he lost, his wishes to secure: + </p> + <p> + The means, we may suppose, not over pure. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + QUITE near the open fields they lived, I've said; + </p> + <p> + An humble, boarded cottage o'er their head. + </p> + <p> + One charming night—no, I mistake 'tis plain, + </p> + <p> + Our hermit, favoured much by wind and rain, + </p> + <p> + Pierced in the boarding, where by time 'twas worn; + </p> + <p> + A hole through which he introduced a horn; + </p> + <p> + And loudly bawled:—attend to what I say, + </p> + <p> + Ye women, my commands at once obey. + </p> + <p> + This voice spread terror through the little cot; + </p> + <p> + Both hid their heads and trembled for their lot; + </p> + <p> + But still our monk his horn would sound aloud + </p> + <p> + Awake! cried he; your favour God has vowed; + </p> + <p> + My faithful servant, Lucius, haste to seek; + </p> + <p> + At early dawn go find this hermit meek + </p> + <p> + To no one say a word: 'tis Heav'n ordains; + </p> + <p> + Fear nothing, Lucius ever blessed remains; + </p> + <p> + I'll show the way myself: your daughter place, + </p> + <p> + Good widow, with this holy man of grace; + </p> + <p> + And from their intercourse a pope shall spring, + </p> + <p> + Who back to virtue christendom will bring. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HE spoke to them so very loud and clear, + </p> + <p> + They heard, though 'neath the clothes half dead with fear. + </p> + <p> + Some time howe'er the females lay in dread; + </p> + <p> + At length the daughter ventured out her head, + </p> + <p> + And, pulling hastily her parent's arm, + </p> + <p> + Said she, dear mother, (not suspecting harm) + </p> + <p> + Good Heav'ns! must I obey and thither go? + </p> + <p> + What would the holy man on me bestow? + </p> + <p> + I know not what to say nor how to act; + </p> + <p> + Now cousin Anne would with him be exact, + </p> + <p> + And better recollect his sage advice:— + </p> + <p> + Fool! said the mother, never be so nice; + </p> + <p> + Go, nothing fear, and do whate'er's desired; + </p> + <p> + Much understanding will not be required; + </p> + <p> + The first or second time thou'lt get thy cue, + </p> + <p> + And cousin Anne will less know what to do. + </p> + <p> + Indeed? the girl replied; well, let's away, + </p> + <p> + And we'll return to bed without delay. + </p> + <p> + But softly, cried the mother with a smile; + </p> + <p> + Not quite so fast, for Satan may beguile; + </p> + <p> + And if 'twere so, hast taken proper care? + </p> + <p> + I think he spoke like one who would ensnare. + </p> + <p> + To be precipitate, in such a case, + </p> + <p> + Perhaps might lead at once to dire disgrace. + </p> + <p> + If thou wert terrified and did'st not hear, + </p> + <p> + Myself I'm sure was quite o'ercome with fear. + </p> + <p> + No, no, rejoined the daughter, I am right: + </p> + <p> + I clearly heard, dear mother, spite of fright. + </p> + <p> + Well then, replied the widow, let us pray, + </p> + <p> + That we by Satan be not led astray. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20107m.jpg" alt="20107m " width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20107.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + AT length they both arose when morning came, + </p> + <p> + And through the day the converse was the same. + </p> + <p> + At night howe'er the horn was heard once more, + </p> + <p> + And terrified the females as before. + </p> + <p> + Thou unbelieving woman, cried the voice, + </p> + <p> + For certain purposes of God the choice; + </p> + <p> + No more delay, but to the hermit fly, + </p> + <p> + Or 'tis decreed that thou shalt quickly die. + </p> + <p> + Now, mother, said the girl, I told you well; + </p> + <p> + Come, let us hasten to the hermit's cell; + </p> + <p> + So much I dread your death, I'll nothing shun; + </p> + <p> + And if 'tis requisite, I'll even run. + </p> + <p> + Away then, cried the mother, let us go; + </p> + <p> + Some pains to dress, the daughter would bestow, + </p> + <p> + Without reflecting what might be her fare:— + </p> + <p> + To PLEASE is ev'ry blooming lass's care. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR monk was on the watch you may suppose; + </p> + <p> + A hole he made that would a glimpse disclose; + </p> + <p> + By which, when near his cell the females drew, + </p> + <p> + They might, with whip in hand the hermit view, + </p> + <p> + Who, like a culprit punished for his crimes, + </p> + <p> + Received the lash, and that so many times, + </p> + <p> + It sounded like the discipline of schools, + </p> + <p> + And made more noise than flogging fifty fools. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN first our pilgrims knocked, he would not hear; + </p> + <p> + And, for the moment, whipping would appear; + </p> + <p> + The holy lash severely he applied, + </p> + <p> + Which, through the hole, with pain our females spied; + </p> + <p> + At length the door he ope'd, but from his eyes + </p> + <p> + No satisfaction beamed: he showed surprise. + </p> + <p> + With trembling knees and blushes o'er the face, + </p> + <p> + The widow now explained the mystick case. + </p> + <p> + Six steps behind, the beauteous daughter stood, + </p> + <p> + And waited the decree she thought so good. + </p> + <p> + The hypocrite howe'er the hermit played, + </p> + <p> + And sent these humble pilgrims back dismayed. + </p> + <p> + Said he, the evil spirit much I dread; + </p> + <p> + No female to my cell should e'er be led; + </p> + <p> + Excuse me then: such acts would sorrow bring; + </p> + <p> + From me the HOLY FATHER ne'er spring. + </p> + <p> + What ne'er from you? the widow straight replied: + </p> + <p> + And why should not the blessing, pray, be tried? + </p> + <p> + No other answer howsoe'er she got; + </p> + <p> + So back they trudged once more to gain their cot. + </p> + <p> + Ah! mother, said the girl, 'tis my belief, + </p> + <p> + Our many heavy sins have caused thus grief. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN night arrived and they in sleep were lost, + </p> + <p> + Again the hermit's horn the woodwork crossed; + </p> + <p> + Return, return, cried he with horrid tone; + </p> + <p> + To-morrow you'll have due attention shown; + </p> + <p> + I've changed the hermit's cold fastidious mind, + </p> + <p> + And when you come, he'll act as I've designed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE couple left their bed at break of day, + </p> + <p> + And to the cell repaired without delay + </p> + <p> + Our tale to shorten, Lucius kind appeared + </p> + <p> + To rigid rules no longer he adhered. + </p> + <p> + The mother with him let her girl remain, + </p> + <p> + And hastened to her humble roof again. + </p> + <p> + The belle complying looked:—he took her arm, + </p> + <p> + And soon familiar grew with ev'ry charm. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + O HYPOCRITES! how oft your wily art + </p> + <p> + Deceives the world and causes poignant smart. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT matins they so very often met, + </p> + <p> + Some awkward indications caused regret. + </p> + <p> + The fair at length her apron-string perceived + </p> + <p> + Grew daily shorter, which her bosom grieved; + </p> + <p> + But nothing to the hermit she'd unfold, + </p> + <p> + Nor e'en those feelings to her mother told; + </p> + <p> + She dreaded lest she should be sent away, + </p> + <p> + And be deprived at once of Cupid's play. + </p> + <p> + You'll tell me whence so much discernment came? + </p> + <p> + From this same play:—the tree of art by name. + </p> + <p> + For sev'n long months the nymph her visits paid; + </p> + <p> + Her inexperience doubtless wanted aid. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BUT when the mother saw her daughter's case, + </p> + <p> + She made her thank the monk, and leave the place. + </p> + <p> + The hermit blessed the Lord for what was done; + </p> + <p> + A pleasant course his humble slave had run. + </p> + <p> + He told the mother and her daughter fair, + </p> + <p> + The child, by God's permission, gifts would share. + </p> + <p> + Howe'er, be careful, said the wily wight, + </p> + <p> + That with your infant ev'ry thing goes right; + </p> + <p> + To you, from thence, great happiness will spring: + </p> + <p> + You'll reign the parent of what's more than king; + </p> + <p> + Your relatives to noble rank will rise: + </p> + <p> + Some will be princes; others lords comprise; + </p> + <p> + Your nephews cardinals; your cousins too + </p> + <p> + Will dukes become, if they the truth pursue; + </p> + <p> + And places, castles, palaces, there'll be, + </p> + <p> + For you and them of every high degree; + </p> + <p> + You'll nothing want: eternal is the source, + </p> + <p> + Like waters flowing in the river's course. + </p> + <p> + This long prediction o'er: with features grave, + </p> + <p> + His benediction to them both he gave. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN home returned, the girl, each day and night, + </p> + <p> + Amused her mind with prospects of delight; + </p> + <p> + By fancy's aid she saw the future pope, + </p> + <p> + And all prepared to greet her fondest hope; + </p> + <p> + But what arrived the whole at once o'erthrew + </p> + <p> + Hats, dukedoms, castles, vanished from the view: + </p> + <p> + The promised elevation of the NAME + </p> + <p> + Dissolved to air:-a little female came! <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Convent_Gardener" id="Convent_Gardener"></a>THE CONVENT + GARDENER OF LAMPORECHIO + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20114m.jpg" alt="20114m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20114.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">W</span>HEN Cupid with his dart, would hearts assail, + </p> + <p> + The rampart most secure is not the VEIL; + </p> + <p> + A husband better will the FAIR protect, + </p> + <p> + Than walls or lattices, I much suspect. + </p> + <p> + Those parents, who in nunneries have got + </p> + <p> + Their daughters (whether willingly or not), + </p> + <p> + Most clearly in a glaring error prove, + </p> + <p> + To fancy God will round their actions move; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis an abuse of what we hold divine; + </p> + <p> + The Devil with them surely must combine. + </p> + <p> + Besides, 'twere folly to suppose that vice + </p> + <p> + Ne'er entered convent walls, and nuns were ice. + </p> + <p> + A very diff'rent sentiment I hold: + </p> + <p> + Girls, who in publick move, however bold, + </p> + <p> + Have greater terrors lest they get a stain; + </p> + <p> + For, honour lost, they never fame regain. + </p> + <p> + Few enemies their modesty attack; + </p> + <p> + The others have but one their minds to rack. + </p> + <p> + TEMPTATION, daughter of the drowsy dame, + </p> + <p> + That hates to move, and IDLENESS we name, + </p> + <p> + Is ever practising each wily art, + </p> + <p> + To spread her snares around the throbbing heart; + </p> + <p> + And fond DESIRE, the child of lorn CONSTRAINT, + </p> + <p> + Is anxious to the soul soft scenes to paint. + </p> + <p> + If I've a worthy daughter made a nun, + </p> + <p> + Is that a reason she's a saint?—Mere fun! + </p> + <p> + Avaunt such folly!—three in four you'll find, + </p> + <p> + Of those who wear the veil—have changed their mind; + </p> + <p> + Their fingers bite, and often do much worse: + </p> + <p> + Those convent vows, full soon, become a curse; + </p> + <p> + Such things at least have sometimes reached my ear + </p> + <p> + (For doubtless I must speak from others here); + </p> + <p> + Of his Boccace a merry tale has told, + </p> + <p> + Which into rhyme I've put, as you'll behold. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WITHIN a nunnery, in days of yore, + </p> + <p> + A good old man supplied the garden-store; + </p> + <p> + The nuns, in general, were smart and gay, + </p> + <p> + And kept their tongues in motion through the day. + </p> + <p> + Religious duties they regarded less, + </p> + <p> + Than for the palour* to be nice in dress + </p> + <p> + Arranging ev'ry article to please, + </p> + <p> + That each might captivate and charm at ease; + </p> + <p> + The changes constantly they rang around, + </p> + <p> + And made the convent-walls with din resound. + </p> + <p> + Eight sisters and an abbess held the place, + </p> + <p> + And strange to say—there DISCORD you might trace. + </p> + <p> + All nine had youth, and many beauty too: + </p> + <p> + Young friars round the place were oft in view, + </p> + <p> + Who reckoned ev'ry step they took so well, + </p> + <p> + That always in the proper road they fell. + </p> + <p> + Th' aged gard'ner, of whom ere now we spoke, + </p> + <p> + Was oft bewildered, they would so provoke; + </p> + <p> + Capricious, whimsical, from day to day, + </p> + <p> + Each would command and try to have her way; + </p> + <p> + And as they ne'er agreed among themselves, + </p> + <p> + He suffered more than if with fifty elves; + </p> + <p> + When one was pleased, another soon complained: + </p> + <p> + At length to quit the nuns he was constrained. + </p> + <p> + He left them, poor and wretched as he came; + </p> + <p> + No cross, pile, money:—e'en his coat the same. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A YOUTH of Lamporechio, gay and bold, + </p> + <p> + One day this gard'ner met as I am told; + </p> + <p> + And after conversation 'bout the place, + </p> + <p> + Said, he should like nun's service to embrace, + </p> + <p> + And that he wished sincerely to be hired: + </p> + <p> + He'd gratis do whatever was required. + </p> + <p> + 'Twas clear indeed his object was not pelf; + </p> + <p> + He thought however he might reward himself; + </p> + <p> + And as the sisters were not over wise, + </p> + <p> + A nun he now and then might make his prize; + </p> + <p> + Proceed from one to more with like address, + </p> + <p> + Till with the whole he'd had complete success. + </p> + <p> + Said Nuto (such we find the gard'ner's name), + </p> + <p> + Believe me, friend, you will be much to blame; + </p> + <p> + Some other service seek, I recommend; + </p> + <p> + These convent-dames will ne'er their whimseys end. + </p> + <p> + I'd rather live without or soup or bread, + </p> + <p> + Than work for them, however nicely fed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + STRANGE creatures are these nuns, upon my word; + </p> + <p> + Their ways ridiculous and e'en absurd; + </p> + <p> + Who, with the sisterhood, has never been, + </p> + <p> + Has clearly yet, not perfect torment seen, + </p> + <p> + Such service, prithee, never try to gain; + </p> + <p> + To do what they require I know is vain; + </p> + <p> + One will have soft, and t'other asks for hard: + </p> + <p> + Thou'lt be a fool such ninnies to regard; + </p> + <p> + No work thou'lt do, whatever be the want: + </p> + <p> + THIS cabbages,—THAT carrots tells thee plant: + </p> + <p> + Said t'other, fain I'd bring it to the test; + </p> + <p> + I'm but a simpleton, it is confessed; + </p> + <p> + Yet still a month in place, and thou wilt see; + </p> + <p> + How well I with the convent-dames agree. + </p> + <p> + The reason is, my life is in its prime, + </p> + <p> + While thou art sunk in years and worn by time, + </p> + <p> + I'm proper for their work, and only ask, + </p> + <p> + To be admitted to the drudging task. + </p> + <p> + Well, said the former, if resolved to try, + </p> + <p> + To their factotum instantly apply; + </p> + <p> + Come; let's away. Lead on, the other cried; + </p> + <p> + I've got a thought, which I'll to you confide:— + </p> + <p> + I'll seem an idiot, and quite dumb appear.— + </p> + <p> + In that, said Nuto, only persevere, + </p> + <p> + And then perhaps the confessor thou'lt find, + </p> + <p> + With their factotum carelessly inclined; + </p> + <p> + No fears nor dark suspicions of a mute: + </p> + <p> + Thou'lt ev'ry way, my friend, their wishes suit. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE place, as was expected, soon he got; + </p> + <p> + And half the grounds to trench, at once his lot: + </p> + <p> + He acted well the nincompoop and fool, + </p> + <p> + Yet still was steady to the garden tool; + </p> + <p> + The nuns continually would flock around, + </p> + <p> + And much amusement in his anticks found. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ONE day, as sleeping lay our sprightly wight, + </p> + <p> + Or feigning sleep, no matter which is right, + </p> + <p> + (Boccace pretends the latter was the fact) + </p> + <p> + Two nuns (perhaps not two the most exact,) + </p> + <p> + Observing him extended on the sward, + </p> + <p> + While summer's heat from air so much debarred; + </p> + <p> + That few would venture from the convent-roof, + </p> + <p> + Lest, 'gainst the sun, their cheeks should not be proof: + </p> + <p> + Said one, approaching him, let's take this fool, + </p> + <p> + And place him in the garden-house to cool. + </p> + <p> + The lad was handsome, with engaging mien: + </p> + <p> + The nun admired the features she had seen, + </p> + <p> + And Cupid raised a wish to be at ease, + </p> + <p> + Where she, without restraint, herself might please. + </p> + <p> + What would you, cried the other, with him do? + </p> + <p> + You'll see, rejoined the first, if we pursue; + </p> + <p> + Just what might be expected from the place; + </p> + <p> + Christ! said the second (with a cross of grace), + </p> + <p> + You would not surely do what is forbid? + </p> + <p> + Suppose increase? it never could be hid; + </p> + <p> + Besides, should we be seen, 'twill be the cause, + </p> + <p> + Of dire disgrace to break such sacred laws. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WE shall not be observed, the first replied; + </p> + <p> + These ills thy fancy forms: haste, let's decide, + </p> + <p> + And seize the moment while 'tis in our reach, + </p> + <p> + Without regard to what old dotards teach, + </p> + <p> + Or what may happen at a future hour; + </p> + <p> + Here's no one near: 'tis fully in our pow'r; + </p> + <p> + The time and place so thoroughly agree, + </p> + <p> + 'Twill be impossible our freaks to see; + </p> + <p> + But 'twill be right that one should watch with care; + </p> + <p> + While t'other with the lad seeks joys to share, + </p> + <p> + And irksome gloom endeavours to dispel: + </p> + <p> + He's dumb, you know, and tales can never tell. + </p> + <p> + The other answered, since 'tis your desire, + </p> + <p> + I'll acquiesce and do what you require; + </p> + <p> + You'll take him first: I see it is your aim; + </p> + <p> + And since it will oblige, I'll wave my claim; + </p> + <p> + Go, pleasure seek, and satisfy each wish: + </p> + <p> + You're always anxious for a fav'rite dish; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis only to oblige that I comply. + </p> + <p> + That, said the other, clearly I descry; + </p> + <p> + I'm well persuaded, thou art always kind; + </p> + <p> + But still I think thou would'st not be inclined; + </p> + <p> + In such a scene to take the leading part, + </p> + <p> + Thy bashfulness would counteract thy heart. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + Some time the squeamish sister watched the spot; + </p> + <p> + At length the other, who'd her wishes got, + </p> + <p> + The station took; the lab'rer tried to please + </p> + <p> + The second as the first, but less at ease; + </p> + <p> + So many favours fell not to her share, + </p> + <p> + And only treble comfort proved her fare. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE garden-path, and summer-house as well, + </p> + <p> + Were well remembered by each wanton belle; + </p> + <p> + No need of guides; and soon our spark contrived; + </p> + <p> + With sister Agnes also to be hived + </p> + <p> + A press-house at the convent end he chose, + </p> + <p> + in which he showed her how soft pleasure flows; + </p> + <p> + Nor Claudia nor Angelica would miss + </p> + <p> + The dormitory that, and cellar this; + </p> + <p> + In short the garret and the vaulted cave + </p> + <p> + Knew fully how the sisters could behave; + </p> + <p> + Not one but what he first or last regaled + </p> + <p> + E'en with the rigid abbess he prevailed, + </p> + <p> + To take a dance, and as the dame required + </p> + <p> + Her treble share of what was most admired, + </p> + <p> + The other nuns were oft obliged to fast, + </p> + <p> + While with the convent-head his time was passed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + To no restoratives our Wight would run; + </p> + <p> + Though these do little, where much work is done: + </p> + <p> + So oft the lad was pressed for cheering play, + </p> + <p> + That with the abbess, when engaged one day, + </p> + <p> + He said, where'er I go, 'tis common talk, + </p> + <p> + With only sev'n an able bird should walk, + </p> + <p> + Yet constantly I've got no less than nine:— + </p> + <p> + The abbess cried,—A miracle divine! + </p> + <p> + Here nuns, pray haste, and quickly come around; + </p> + <p> + We've fasted with success:—his tongue is found. + </p> + <p> + The eight encircled him with great surprise; + </p> + <p> + No longer dumb.—they viewed with eager eyes: + </p> + <p> + A consultation instantly was had, + </p> + <p> + When 'twas agreed to honour well the lad, + </p> + <p> + And try to make him secrecy observe; + </p> + <p> + But if dismissed, from silence he might swerve. + </p> + <p> + The active youth, well fed, well paid, thus blessed, + </p> + <p> + Did all he could,—and others did the rest. + </p> + <p> + He for the nuns procured a little lot, + </p> + <p> + That afterward two little friars got, + </p> + <p> + And in the sequel fathers soon became; + </p> + <p> + The sisters mothers too, in spite of shame; + </p> + <p> + But never name more justly was applied: + </p> + <p> + In vain their mysteries they strove to hide. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + * The parlour in a convent is the room where the nuns are + </p> + <p> + permitted to speak to their friends through a lattice. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Mandrake" id="Mandrake"></a>THE MANDRAKE + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20124m.jpg" alt="20124m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20124.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">F</span>LORENTINE we now design to show;— + </p> + <p> + A greater blockhead ne'er appeared below; + </p> + <p> + It seems a prudent woman he had wed, + </p> + <p> + With beauty that might grace a monarch's bed; + </p> + <p> + Young, brisk, good-humoured, with engaging mien; + </p> + <p> + None in the town, or round, the like was seen: + </p> + <p> + Her praises every voice inclined to sing, + </p> + <p> + And judged her worthy of a mighty king; + </p> + <p> + At least a better husband she deserved: + </p> + <p> + An arrant fool he looked, and quite unnerved. + </p> + <p> + This Nicia Calfucci (for such his name) + </p> + <p> + Was fully bent to have a father's fame, + </p> + <p> + And thought his country honour he could do, + </p> + <p> + Could he contrive his lineage to pursue. + </p> + <p> + No holy saint in Paradise was blessed, + </p> + <p> + But what this husband fervently addressed; + </p> + <p> + From day to day, so oft he teazed for grace, + </p> + <p> + They scarcely knew his off'rings where to place. + </p> + <p> + No matron, quack, nor conjurer around, + </p> + <p> + But what he tried their qualities profound; + </p> + <p> + Yet all in vain: in spite of charm or book, + </p> + <p> + No father he, whatever pains he took. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TO Florence then returned a youth from France; + </p> + <p> + Where he had studied,—more than complaisance: + </p> + <p> + Well trained as any from that polished court; + </p> + <p> + To Fortune's favours anxious to resort; + </p> + <p> + Gallant and seeking ev'ry FAIR to please; + </p> + <p> + Each house, road, alley, soon he knew at ease; + </p> + <p> + The husbands, good or bad, their whims and years, + </p> + <p> + With ev'ry thing that moved their hopes or fears; + </p> + <p> + What sort of fuel best their females charmed; + </p> + <p> + What spies were kept by those who felt alarmed; + </p> + <p> + The if's, for's, to's, and ev'ry artful wile, + </p> + <p> + That might in love a confidant beguile, + </p> + <p> + Or nurse, or father-confessor, or dog; + </p> + <p> + When passion prompts, few obstacles can clog. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE snares were spread, each stratagem was laid; + </p> + <p> + And every thing arranged to furnish aid, + </p> + <p> + When our gay spark determined to invest + </p> + <p> + Old Nicia with the cuckold's branching crest. + </p> + <p> + The plan no doubt was well conceived and bold; + </p> + <p> + The lady to her friends appeared not cold; + </p> + <p> + Within her husband's house she seemed polite; + </p> + <p> + But ne'er familiarly was seen invite, + </p> + <p> + No further could a lover dare proceed; + </p> + <p> + Not one had hope the belle his flame would heed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR youth, Calimachus, no sooner came, + </p> + <p> + But he howe'er appeared to please the dame; + </p> + <p> + His camp he pitched and entered on the siege + </p> + <p> + Of fair Lucretia, faithful to her liege, + </p> + <p> + Who presently the haughty tigress played, + </p> + <p> + And sent him, like the rest, away dismayed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HE, scarcely knew what saint he could invoke; + </p> + <p> + When Nicia's folly served him for a cloak; + </p> + <p> + However strange, no stratagem nor snare, + </p> + <p> + But what the fool would willingly prepare + </p> + <p> + With all his heart, and nothing fancy wrong; + </p> + <p> + That might to others possibly belong. + </p> + <p> + The lover and himself, as learned men, + </p> + <p> + Had conversations ev'ry now and then; + </p> + <p> + For Nicia was a doctor in the law: + </p> + <p> + Degree, to him, not worth a single straw; + </p> + <p> + Far better had he common prudence traced; + </p> + <p> + And not his confidence so badly placed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ONE day he to Calimachus complained, + </p> + <p> + Of want of heirs, and wished they could be gained: + </p> + <p> + Where lay the fault? He was a gay gallant; + </p> + <p> + Lucretia young with features to enchant. + </p> + <p> + When I at Paris was, replied our wight, + </p> + <p> + There passed a clever man, a curious sight, + </p> + <p> + His company with anxious care I sought, + </p> + <p> + And was at length a hundred secrets taught; + </p> + <p> + 'Mong others how, at will, to get an heir:— + </p> + <p> + A certain thing, he often would declare; + </p> + <p> + The great Mogul had tried it on his queen, + </p> + <p> + just two years since, the heir might then be seen; + </p> + <p> + And many other princesses of fame, + </p> + <p> + Had added by it to their husband's name. + </p> + <p> + 'Twas very true; I've seen it fully proved: + </p> + <p> + The remedy all obstacles removed; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis from the root of certain tree expressed; + </p> + <p> + A juice most potent ev'ry where confessed, + </p> + <p> + And Mandrake called, which taken by a wife; + </p> + <p> + More pow'r evinces o'er organick life, + </p> + <p> + Than from conventual grace was e'er derived, + </p> + <p> + Though in the cloister youthful friars hived. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TEN months from hence I'll you a father make; + </p> + <p> + No longer time than that I ask to take; + </p> + <p> + This period o'er, the child to church we'll bring,— + </p> + <p> + If true, said Nicia, what a glorious thing! + </p> + <p> + You'll do me services I can't express.— + </p> + <p> + Don't doubt it, cried the spark of smart address: + </p> + <p> + Must I the fact so oft to you repeat? + </p> + <p> + I've seen it with my eyes; 'tis most complete; + </p> + <p> + You mean to jest, assuredly my friend; + </p> + <p> + Would you by doubts the great Mogul offend? + </p> + <p> + So handsomely this traveller he paid, + </p> + <p> + No sign of discontent he e'er betrayed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + 'TIS excellent, the Florentine replied; + </p> + <p> + Lucretia must be pleased to have it tried; + </p> + <p> + What satisfaction! in her arms to view + </p> + <p> + An infant that my lineage will renew. + </p> + <p> + Now, worthy friend, you god-father shall stand; + </p> + <p> + This very day pray take the thing in hand. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NOT quite so fast, rejoined our smart gallant, + </p> + <p> + First know the plan, before consent you grant; + </p> + <p> + There is an ill attends the whole affair; + </p> + <p> + But what below, alas! is free from care; + </p> + <p> + This juice, possessing virtues so divine, + </p> + <p> + Has also pow'rs that prove the most malign: + </p> + <p> + Whoe'er receives the patient's first embrace; + </p> + <p> + Too fatally the dire effects will trace; + </p> + <p> + Death oft succeeds the momentary joy; + </p> + <p> + We scarcely good can find without alloy. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + YOUR servant; sir, said Nicia with surprise; + </p> + <p> + No more of this: the name will me suffice; + </p> + <p> + Lucretia we will let remain at ease: + </p> + <p> + What you propose can never truly please; + </p> + <p> + If I must die by getting of a son, + </p> + <p> + 'Tis better far the benefit to shun; + </p> + <p> + Go find some other for your wondrous art; + </p> + <p> + In fact I'm not inclined with life to part. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HOW strange your conduct, cried the sprightly youth: + </p> + <p> + Extremes you seek, and overleap the truth; + </p> + <p> + Just now the fond desire to have a boy + </p> + <p> + Chased ev'ry care and filled your heart with joy; + </p> + <p> + At present quite the contrary appears + </p> + <p> + A moment changed your fondest hopes to fears; + </p> + <p> + Come, hear the rest; no longer waste your breath: + </p> + <p> + Kind Nature all can cure, excepting death. + </p> + <p> + What's necessary pray, that things succeed? + </p> + <p> + Some youthful clod for once should take the lead, + </p> + <p> + And clear the way of ev'ry venom round + </p> + <p> + Then you with safety may commence to sound; + </p> + <p> + No time you'll lose, but instantly begin + </p> + <p> + And you'll most certainly your object win. + </p> + <p> + This step is necessary to the end; + </p> + <p> + Some lad of little worth I recommend; + </p> + <p> + But not ill made, nor savagely robust, + </p> + <p> + To give your lady terror nor disgust. + </p> + <p> + We know that, used to Nicia's soft caress, + </p> + <p> + Lucretia would disrelish rude address; + </p> + <p> + Indeed 'tis possible in such event, + </p> + <p> + Her tender heart would never give consent; + </p> + <p> + This led me to propose a man that's young; + </p> + <p> + Besides, the more he proves for action strong, + </p> + <p> + The less of venom will behind remain, + </p> + <p> + And I'll engage that ev'ry drop he'll drain. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT first the husband disapproved the plan, + </p> + <p> + The infamy, and danger which they ran + </p> + <p> + Perhaps the magistrate might have him sought, + </p> + <p> + And he, of murder, guilty might be thought; + </p> + <p> + The sudden death would mightily perplex; + </p> + <p> + A fellow's creature's loss would sorely vex; + </p> + <p> + Lucretia, who'd withstood each tempter's charms, + </p> + <p> + Was now to be disgraced in rustick arms! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + CALIMACHUS, with eagerness replied; + </p> + <p> + I would a man of consequence provide, + </p> + <p> + Or one, at all events, whose anxious aim + </p> + <p> + Would be, aloud the myst'ry, to proclaim! + </p> + <p> + But fear and folly would contain the clown, + </p> + <p> + Or money at the worst would stop renown, + </p> + <p> + Your better half apparently resigned; + </p> + <p> + The clod without intention of the kind; + </p> + <p> + In short whate'er arrived, 'tis clear your case + </p> + <p> + Could not with Cuckoldom be well in place. + </p> + <p> + Besides 'tis no way certain but our blade, + </p> + <p> + By strength of nerves the poison may evade; + </p> + <p> + And that's a double reason for the choice, + </p> + <p> + Since with more certainty we shall rejoice: + </p> + <p> + The venom may evaporate in fume, + </p> + <p> + And Mandrake pleasing pow'rs at once assume; + </p> + <p> + For when I spoke of death, I did not mean, + </p> + <p> + That nothing from it would the person screen; + </p> + <p> + To-morrow we the rustick lad must name; + </p> + <p> + To-night the potion given your charming dame; + </p> + <p> + I've some already with me, all prepared; + </p> + <p> + Let nothing of your project be declared: + </p> + <p> + You should not seem to know what we've designed; + </p> + <p> + Ligurio you'll permit this clod to find; + </p> + <p> + You can most thoroughly in him confide: + </p> + <p> + Discretion, secrecy, with him reside. + </p> + <p> + One thing, however, nearly I'd forgot; + </p> + <p> + A bandage for the eyes we should allot; + </p> + <p> + And when well bound he nothing e'er can trace + </p> + <p> + Of whom, or what, the lady, or the place. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE whole arrangement Nicia much approved; + </p> + <p> + But now 'twas time the lady should be moved. + </p> + <p> + At first she thought it jest, then angry grew, + </p> + <p> + And vowed the plan she never would pursue; + </p> + <p> + Her life she'd rather forfeit than her name: + </p> + <p> + Once known, for ever lost would be her fame + </p> + <p> + Besides the heinous sin and vile offence, + </p> + <p> + God knew she rather would with all dispense; + </p> + <p> + Mere complaisance had led her to comply; + </p> + <p> + Would she admit a wretch with blearing eye, + </p> + <p> + To incommode, and banish tranquil ease? + </p> + <p> + Who could conceive her formed a clod to please? + </p> + <p> + Can I, said she, the paths of honour quit, + </p> + <p> + And in my bed a loathsome brute permit? + </p> + <p> + Or e'er regard the plan but with disdain? + </p> + <p> + No, by saint John, I ever will maintain, + </p> + <p> + Nor beau, nor clown, nor king, nor lord, nor 'squire, + </p> + <p> + Save Nicia, with me freely shall retire. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE fair Lucretia seemed so firmly bent, + </p> + <p> + To father Timothy at length they went, + </p> + <p> + Who preached the lady such a fine discourse, + </p> + <p> + She ceded more through penitence than force. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + MOREOVER she was promised that the lad + </p> + <p> + Should be nor clownish, nor in person bad; + </p> + <p> + Nor such as any way might give disgust, + </p> + <p> + But one to whom she perfectly might trust. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE wondrous draught was taken by the fair; + </p> + <p> + Next day our Wight prepared his wily snare: + </p> + <p> + Himself bepowdered like a miller's man, + </p> + <p> + With beard and whiskers to complete his plan; + </p> + <p> + A better metamorphose ne'er was seen; + </p> + <p> + Ligurio, who had in the secret been, + </p> + <p> + So thoroughly disguised the lover thought, + </p> + <p> + At midnight him to Nicia freely brought, + </p> + <p> + With bandage o'er the eyes and hair disdained, + </p> + <p> + Not once the husband of deceit complained. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BESIDE the dame in silence slid our spark; + </p> + <p> + In silence she attended in the dark, + </p> + <p> + Perfumed and nicely ev'ry way bedecked; + </p> + <p> + For what? you ask, or whom did she expect; + </p> + <p> + Were all these pains a miller to receive?— + </p> + <p> + Too much they cannot take, the sex believe; + </p> + <p> + And whether kings or millers be their aim, + </p> + <p> + The wish to please is ever found the same. + </p> + <p> + 'Tis double honour in a woman thought, + </p> + <p> + When by her charms a torpid heart is caught; + </p> + <p> + She, who in icy bosoms flame can raise, + </p> + <p> + Deserving doubtless is of treble praise. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE spark disguised, his place no sooner took, + </p> + <p> + But awkwardness he presently forsook; + </p> + <p> + No more the miller, but the smart gallant: + </p> + <p> + The lady found him kind and complaisant; + </p> + <p> + Such moments we'll suppose were well employed; + </p> + <p> + Though trembling fears not perfectly destroyed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SHE, to herself, remarked, 'tis very strange, + </p> + <p> + This lad's demeanour should so quickly change; + </p> + <p> + He's quite another character, 'tis clear; + </p> + <p> + What pity that his end should be so near; + </p> + <p> + Alas! he merits not so hard a fate; + </p> + <p> + I feel regret the lot should him await; + </p> + <p> + And while soft pleasure seems his heart's delight; + </p> + <p> + His soul is doomed from hence to take its flight. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE husband who so fully gave consent, + </p> + <p> + Was led his partner's suff'rings to lament + </p> + <p> + The spirit of a queen in truth she showed, + </p> + <p> + When cuckoldom was on her spouse bestowed; + </p> + <p> + In decoration, forced to acquiesce, + </p> + <p> + She would not condescend to join caress. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + LUCRETIA howsoe'er the lad approved; + </p> + <p> + His winning manners much her favour moved. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN he the subtle venom had subdued, + </p> + <p> + He took her hand, and having fondly sued, + </p> + <p> + Said he, your pardon lady now I ask; + </p> + <p> + Be not displeased when I remove the mask; + </p> + <p> + Your rage restrain; a trick on you's been played; + </p> + <p> + Calimachus am I; be not dismayed; + </p> + <p> + Approve my sacrifice; the secret's known; + </p> + <p> + Your rigour would be useless now if shown; + </p> + <p> + Should I be doomed howe'er to breathe my last, + </p> + <p> + I die content, rememb'ring what has passed; + </p> + <p> + You have the means my life at will to take; + </p> + <p> + More havock with me soft delight could make, + </p> + <p> + Than any poison that the draught possessed; + </p> + <p> + Mere folly, imposition, all the rest. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TILL then Lucretia had resistance made; + </p> + <p> + To seem submissive she was still afraid; + </p> + <p> + The lover was not hated by the belle, + </p> + <p> + But bashfulness she could not well dispel, + </p> + <p> + Which, joined to simple manners mixed with fear, + </p> + <p> + Ungrateful made her, spite of self, appear. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IN silence wrapt, and scarcely drawing breath, + </p> + <p> + By passion moved, and yet ashamed to death, + </p> + <p> + Not knowing how to act, so great her grief, + </p> + <p> + From tears, her throbbing bosom sought relief. + </p> + <p> + Look, could she e'er her lover in the face? + </p> + <p> + Will he not think me covered with disgrace? + </p> + <p> + Said she, within herself;—what else believe? + </p> + <p> + My wits were lost to let him thus deceive. + </p> + <p> + O'ercome by sorrow, then she turned her head, + </p> + <p> + And tried to hide herself within the bed, + </p> + <p> + At furthest end, but vain alas her aim, + </p> + <p> + The lover thither in a moment came: + </p> + <p> + Her only ground, remaining unsubdued, + </p> + <p> + Surrendered when the vanquisher pursued, + </p> + <p> + Who every thing submitted to his will, + </p> + <p> + And tears no more her eyes were found to fill; + </p> + <p> + Shame took to flight, and scruples spread the wing; + </p> + <p> + How happy those whom duping GAIN can bring! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TOO soon Aurora for our spark appeared; + </p> + <p> + Too soon for her so thoroughly revered; + </p> + <p> + Said he, the poison, that can life devour, + </p> + <p> + Requires repeated acts to crush its pow'r. + </p> + <p> + The foll'wing days our youthful am'rous pair + </p> + <p> + Found opportunities for pleasing fare. + </p> + <p> + The husband scarcely could himself contain, + </p> + <p> + So anxiously he wished his aim to gain. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE lover from the belle at length arose, + </p> + <p> + And hastened to his house to seek repose; + </p> + <p> + But scarcely had he placed himself in bed, + </p> + <p> + When our good husband's footsteps thither led; + </p> + <p> + He, to the spark, related with delight, + </p> + <p> + How mandrake-juice succeeded in the night. + </p> + <p> + Said he, at first beside the bed I crept, + </p> + <p> + And listened if the miller near her kept, + </p> + <p> + Or whether he to converse was inclined, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry way to act as was designed. + </p> + <p> + I then my wife was anxious to address, + </p> + <p> + And whispered that she should the youth caress; + </p> + <p> + Nor dread too much the spoiling of her charms: + </p> + <p> + Indeed 'twas all embarrassing alarms. + </p> + <p> + Don't think, said I, that either can deceive; + </p> + <p> + I ev'ry thing shall hear, you may believe; + </p> + <p> + Know, Nicia is a man, who well may say, + </p> + <p> + He's trusted without measure ev'ry day. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + PRAY recollect my very life 's at stake, + </p> + <p> + And do not many difficulties make. + </p> + <p> + Convince thereby how much your spouse you love; + </p> + <p> + 'Twill pleasure doubtless give the pow'rs above. + </p> + <p> + But should the blockhead any how prove shy + </p> + <p> + Send instantly to me; I shall be nigh; + </p> + <p> + I'm going now to rest; by no means fail; + </p> + <p> + We'll soon contrive and ev'ry way prevail. + </p> + <p> + But there was no necessity for this; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis pretty clear that nothing went amiss. + </p> + <p> + In fact the rustick liked the business well, + </p> + <p> + And seemed unwilling to resign the belle, + </p> + <p> + I pity him, and much lament his lot; + </p> + <p> + But—he must die and soon will be forgot: + </p> + <p> + A fig for those who used to crack their jest; + </p> + <p> + In nine months' time a child will be the test. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Rhemese" id="Rhemese"></a>THE RHEMESE + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20138m.jpg" alt="20138m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20138.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">N</span>O city I to Rheims would e'er prefer: + </p> + <p> + Of France the pride and honour I aver; + </p> + <p> + The Holy Ampoule * and delicious wine, + </p> + <p> + Which ev'ry one regards as most divine, + </p> + <p> + We'll set apart, and other objects take: + </p> + <p> + The beauties round a paradise might make! + </p> + <p> + I mean not tow'rs nor churches, gates, nor streets; + </p> + <p> + But charming belles with soft enchanting sweets: + </p> + <p> + Such oft among the fair Rhemese we view: + </p> + <p> + Kings might be proud those graces to pursue. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ONE 'mong these belles had to the altar led, + </p> + <p> + A painter, much esteemed, and who had bread. + </p> + <p> + What more was requisite!—he lived at ease, + </p> + <p> + And by his occupation sought to please. + </p> + <p> + A happy woman all believed his wife; + </p> + <p> + The husband's talents pleased her to the life: + </p> + <p> + For gallantry howe'er he was renowned, + </p> + <p> + And many am'rous dames, who dwelled around, + </p> + <p> + Would seek the artist with a double aim: + </p> + <p> + So all our chronicles record his fame. + </p> + <p> + But since much penetration 's not my boast, + </p> + <p> + I just believe—what's requisite at most. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHENE'ER the painter had in hand a fair, + </p> + <p> + He'd jest his wife, and laugh with easy air; + </p> + <p> + But Hymen's rights proceeding as they ought, + </p> + <p> + With jealous fears her breast was never fraught. + </p> + <p> + She might indeed repay his tricks in kind, + </p> + <p> + And gratify, in soft amours, her mind, + </p> + <p> + Except that she less confidence had shown, + </p> + <p> + And was not led to him the truth to own. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AMONG the men attracted by her smiles, + </p> + <p> + Two neighbours, much delighted with her wiles; + </p> + <p> + Were often tempted, by her sprightly wit, + </p> + <p> + To listen to her chat, and with her sit; + </p> + <p> + For she had far the most engaging mien, + </p> + <p> + Of any charmer that around was seen. + </p> + <p> + Superior understanding she possessed; + </p> + <p> + Though fond of laughter, frolick, fun, and jest. + </p> + <p> + She to her husband presently disclosed + </p> + <p> + The love these cit-gallants to her proposed; + </p> + <p> + Both known for arrant blockheads through the town, + </p> + <p> + And ever boasting of their own renown. + </p> + <p> + To him she gave their various speeches, tones, + </p> + <p> + Each silly air: their tears, and sighs, and groans; + </p> + <p> + They'd read, or rather heard, we may believe, + </p> + <p> + That, when in love, with sighs fond bosoms heave. + </p> + <p> + Their utmost to succeed these coxcombs tried, + </p> + <p> + And seemed convinced they should not be denied; + </p> + <p> + A common cause they would the business hold, + </p> + <p> + And what one knew the other must be told. + </p> + <p> + Whichever first a favour might obtain, + </p> + <p> + Should tell his happiness to t'other swain. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + YE FAIR 'tis thus they oft your kindness treat: + </p> + <p> + The pleasure that he wished alone is sweet. + </p> + <p> + LOVE, is no more; of t'other, laid in earth, + </p> + <p> + We've here no traces scarcely from the birth. + </p> + <p> + You serve for sport and prey, to giddy youth, + </p> + <p> + Devoid of talents, principles, and truth. + </p> + <p> + 'Tis right they should suppose, still two are found; + </p> + <p> + Who take their course continually round. + </p> + <p> + The first that in your pleasure grounds appears; + </p> + <p> + I'd have you, on his wings, to use the shears. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR lady then, her lovers to deceive, + </p> + <p> + One day observed—you shall, my friends, this eve; + </p> + <p> + Drink wine with me:—my husband will away, + </p> + <p> + And, what's delightful, till to-morrow stay; + </p> + <p> + We shall ourselves be able to amuse, + </p> + <p> + And laugh, and sing, and talk as we may choose. + </p> + <p> + 'Tis excellent, cried they: things well you frame; + </p> + <p> + And at the promised hour, the heroes came. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN introduced, and all supposing clear, + </p> + <p> + A sudden knocking turned their joy to fear; + </p> + <p> + The door was barred; she to the window flew; + </p> + <p> + I think, said she, that's to the master due; + </p> + <p> + And should it prove to be as I suspect:— + </p> + <p> + 'Tis he, I vow:—fly, hide, he'll you detect; + </p> + <p> + Some accident, suspicion, or design, + </p> + <p> + Has brought him back to sleep, I now divine: <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR two gallants, when dangers round them pressed, + </p> + <p> + A closet entered, mightily distressed; + </p> + <p> + To get away 'twere folly to have tried; + </p> + <p> + The husband came, the roast he quickly spied; + </p> + <p> + With pigeons too, in diff'rent fashions cooked; + </p> + <p> + Why, hey! said he, as round about he looked: + </p> + <p> + What guests have you that supper you prepare? + </p> + <p> + The wife replied: two neighbours taste our fare: + </p> + <p> + Sweet Alice, and good Simonetta, mean + </p> + <p> + To-night, at table with us to be seen; + </p> + <p> + I'm quite rejoiced to think that you are here: + </p> + <p> + The company will more complete appear; + </p> + <p> + These dames will, by your presence, nothing lose; + </p> + <p> + I'll run and hasten them: 'twill you amuse; + </p> + <p> + The whole is ready; I'll at once away, + </p> + <p> + And beg, in coming, they'll no more delay. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20144m.jpg" alt="20144m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20144.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + THE ladies named were wives of our gallants, + </p> + <p> + So fond of contraband, and smuggled grants, + </p> + <p> + Who, vexed to be confined, still praised the dame, + </p> + <p> + For skewing such address to 'scape from blame. + </p> + <p> + She soon returned, and with her brought the FAIR, + </p> + <p> + Who, gaily singing, entered free from care. + </p> + <p> + The painter them received with bow and kiss; + </p> + <p> + To praise their beauty he was not remiss; + </p> + <p> + Their dress was charming; all he much admired; + </p> + <p> + Their presence frolick, fun, and jest inspired, + </p> + <p> + Which no way pleased the husbands in the cage, + </p> + <p> + Who saw the freaks with marks of bursting rage: + </p> + <p> + The door half open gave a view complete, + </p> + <p> + How freely he their wives was led to treat. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THINGS thus commenced, the supper next was served; + </p> + <p> + From playful tricks the painter never swerved, + </p> + <p> + But placed himself at table 'twist the two, + </p> + <p> + And jest and frolicking would still pursue. + </p> + <p> + To women, wine, and fun, said he, I drink; + </p> + <p> + Put round the toast; none from it e'er must shrink; + </p> + <p> + The order was obeyed; the glass oft filled + </p> + <p> + The party soon had all the liquor swilled: <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE wife just then, it seems, no servant kept; + </p> + <p> + More wine to get, she to the cellar stept. + </p> + <p> + But dreading ghosts, she Simonetta prayed; + </p> + <p> + To light her down, she was so much afraid. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE painter was alone with Alice left, + </p> + <p> + A country belle, of beauty not bereft: + </p> + <p> + Slight, nicely made, with rather pretty face, + </p> + <p> + She thought herself possessed of ev'ry grace, + </p> + <p> + And, in a country town, she well might get + </p> + <p> + The appellation of a gay coquette. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE wily spark, perceiving no one near; + </p> + <p> + Soon ran from compliment to sweet and dear; + </p> + <p> + Her lips assailed;—the tucker drew aside, + </p> + <p> + And stole a kiss that hurt her husband's pride, + </p> + <p> + Who all beheld; but spouses, that are sage, + </p> + <p> + No trifles heed, nor peccadillos page; + </p> + <p> + Though, doubtless, when such meetings are possessed, + </p> + <p> + The simple kiss gives room to dread the rest; + </p> + <p> + For when the devil whispers in the ear + </p> + <p> + Of one that sleeps, he wakes at once to fear. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE husband, howsoe'er, at length perceived + </p> + <p> + Still more concessions, which his bosom grieved; + </p> + <p> + While on the neck a hand appeared to please, + </p> + <p> + The other wandered equally at ease; + </p> + <p> + Be not offended, love! was often said; + </p> + <p> + To frantick rage the sight her sposo led, + </p> + <p> + Who, beating in his hat, was on the move + </p> + <p> + To sally forth, his wrath to let them prove, + </p> + <p> + To thrash his wife, and force her spark to feel + </p> + <p> + his nervous arm could quickly make him reel. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BE not so silly, whispered t'other Wight; + </p> + <p> + To stir up noise could ne'er be reckoned right; + </p> + <p> + Be quiet now: consider where we are; + </p> + <p> + Keep close, or else you'll all our pleasures mar; + </p> + <p> + Remember, written 'tis, By others do + </p> + <p> + The same as you would like they should by you; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis proper in this place we should remain + </p> + <p> + Till all is hushed in sleep: then freedom gain; + </p> + <p> + That's my opinion how we ought to act + </p> + <p> + Are you not half a cuckold now, in fact? + </p> + <p> + Fair Alice has consented:-that's enough; + </p> + <p> + The rest is mere compliance, nonsense, stuff! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE husband seemed the reasons to approve; + </p> + <p> + Some slight attempts the lady made to move; + </p> + <p> + No time for more. What then? you ask:—Why, then— + </p> + <p> + The lady put her cap to rights agen; + </p> + <p> + No mark appeared suspicion to awake, + </p> + <p> + Except her cheek a scarlet hue might take. + </p> + <p> + Mere trifle that; from talking it might spring; + </p> + <p> + And other causes, doubtless, we could bring. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ONE of the belles, howe'er, who went for wine, + </p> + <p> + Smiled, on returning, at the blushing sign: + </p> + <p> + The painter's wife; but soon they filled each glass, + </p> + <p> + And briskly round the bottle seemed to pass; + </p> + <p> + They drank the host, the hostess, and the FAIR, + </p> + <p> + Who, 'mong the three, should first her wishes share. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT length, a second time the bottle failed; + </p> + <p> + The hostess' fear of ghosts again prevailed, + </p> + <p> + And mistress Alice now for escort went, + </p> + <p> + Though much she wished the other to have sent; + </p> + <p> + With Simonetta she was forced to change, + </p> + <p> + And leave the painter at his ease to range. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS dame at first appeared to be severe + </p> + <p> + Would leave the room, and feigned to be sincere; + </p> + <p> + But when the painter seized her by the gown, + </p> + <p> + She prudence showed, and feared he'd pull her down; + </p> + <p> + Her clothes might tear, which led her to remain: + </p> + <p> + On this the husband scarcely could contain; + </p> + <p> + He seemed resolved his hiding place to leave; + </p> + <p> + But instantly the other pulled his sleeve; + </p> + <p> + Be easy friend, said he, it is but right, + </p> + <p> + That equal favours we should have to-night, + </p> + <p> + And cuckoldom should take you to his care, + </p> + <p> + That we alike in ev'ry thing may fare. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ARE we not brothers in adventure, pray? + </p> + <p> + And such our solemn promises, to-day. + </p> + <p> + Since one the painter clearly has disgraced, + </p> + <p> + The other equally should be embraced. + </p> + <p> + In spite of ev'ry thing you now advance, + </p> + <p> + Your wife as well as mine shall have a dance; + </p> + <p> + A hand I'll lend, if wanting it be found; + </p> + <p> + Say what you will, I'll see she has her round. + </p> + <p> + She had it then:—our painter tried to please; + </p> + <p> + The lady equally appeared at ease; + </p> + <p> + Full time the others gave, and when they came, + </p> + <p> + More wine was not required by spark nor dame; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas late, and for the day enough he'd done; + </p> + <p> + Good night was said: their course the belles had run; + </p> + <p> + The painter, satisfied, retired to rest; + </p> + <p> + The gay gallants, who lay so long distressed, + </p> + <p> + The wily hostess from the closet drew, + </p> + <p> + Abashed, disconsolate, and cuckolds too; + </p> + <p> + Still worse to think, with all their care and pain; + </p> + <p> + That neither of them could his wish obtain, + </p> + <p> + Or e'en return the dame what she procured + </p> + <p> + Their wives, whom she so cleverly allured. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HERE ends our tale; the business is complete; + </p> + <p> + In soft amours success alone is sweet. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + * The Saint Ampoule, or Holy Ampulla, a vial said to have + </p> + <p> + descended from heaven, in which was oil for anointing the + </p> + <p> + kings of France at the coronation, and formerly kept at Rheims. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + + <p> + <a name="p103b" id="p103b"></a><img alt="p103b.jpg (47K)" + src="images/p103b.jpg" height="516" width="678" /> + </p> + + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Amorous_Courtesan" id="Amorous_Courtesan"></a>THE AMOROUS + COURTESAN + </h2><p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">D</span>AN CUPID, though the god of soft amour, + </p> + <p> + In ev'ry age works miracles a store; + </p> + <p> + Can Catos change to male coquets at ease; + </p> + <p> + And fools make oracles whene'er he please; + </p> + <p> + Turn wolves to sheep, and ev'ry thing so well, + </p> + <p> + That naught remains the former shape to tell: + </p> + <p> + Remember, Hercules, with wond'rous pow'r, + </p> + <p> + And Polyphemus, who would men devour: + </p> + <p> + The one upon a rock himself would fling, + </p> + <p> + And to the winds his am'rous ditties sing; + </p> + <p> + To cut his beard a nymph could him inspire; + </p> + <p> + And, in the water, he'd his face admire. + </p> + <p> + His club the other to a spindle changed, + </p> + <p> + To please the belle with whom he often ranged. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A hundred instances the fact attest, + </p> + <p> + But sage Boccace has one, it is confessed, + </p> + <p> + Which seems to me, howe'er we search around, + </p> + <p> + To be a sample, rarely to be found. + </p> + <p> + 'Tis Chimon that I mean, a savage youth, + </p> + <p> + Well formed in person, but the rest uncouth, + </p> + <p> + A-bear in mind, but Cupid much can do, + </p> + <p> + LOVE licked the cub, and decent soon he grew. + </p> + <p> + A fine gallant at length the lad appeared; + </p> + <p> + From whence the change?—Fine eyes his bosom cheered + </p> + <p> + The piercing rays no sooner reached his sight, + </p> + <p> + But all the savage took at once to flight; + </p> + <p> + He felt the tender flame; polite became; + </p> + <p> + You'll find howe'er, our tale is not the same. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20150m.jpg" alt="20150m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20150.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + I MEAN to state how once an easy fair, + </p> + <p> + Who oft amused the youth devoid of care, + </p> + <p> + A tender flame within her heart retained, + </p> + <p> + Though haughty, singular, and unrestrained. + </p> + <p> + Not easy 'twas her favours to procure; + </p> + <p> + Rome was the place where dwelled this belle impure; + </p> + <p> + The mitre and the cross with her were naught; + </p> + <p> + Though at her feet, she'd give them not a thought; + </p> + <p> + And those who were not of the highest class, + </p> + <p> + No moments were allowed with her to pass. + </p> + <p> + A member of the conclave, first in rank, + </p> + <p> + To be her slave, she'd scarcely deign to thank; + </p> + <p> + Unless a cardinal's gay nephew came, + </p> + <p> + And then, perhaps, she'd listen to his flame; + </p> + <p> + The pope himself, had he perceived her charms, + </p> + <p> + Would not have been too good to grace her arms. + </p> + <p> + Her pride appeared in clothes as well as air, + </p> + <p> + And on her sparkled gold and jewels rare; + </p> + <p> + In all the elegance of dress arrayed, + </p> + <p> + Embroidery and lace, her taste displayed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE god of soft amour beheld her aim; + </p> + <p> + And sought at once her haughty soul to tame; + </p> + <p> + A Roman gentleman, of finest form, + </p> + <p> + Soon in her bosom raised a furious storm; + </p> + <p> + Camillus was the name this youth had got; + </p> + <p> + The nymph's was Constance, that LOVE'S arrow shot: + </p> + <p> + Though he was mild, good humoured, and serene, + </p> + <p> + No sooner Constance had his person seen, + </p> + <p> + And in her breast received the urchin's dart, + </p> + <p> + Than throbs, and trembling fears o'erwhelmed her heart. + </p> + <p> + The flame she durst declare no other way, + </p> + <p> + Than by those sighs, which feelings oft betray. + </p> + <p> + Till then, nor shame nor aught could her retain; + </p> + <p> + Now all was changed:—her bashfulness was plain. + </p> + <p> + As none, howe'er, could think the subtle flame + </p> + <p> + Would lie concealed with such a haughty dame, + </p> + <p> + Camillus nothing of the kind supposed. + </p> + <p> + Though she incessantly by looks disclosed, + </p> + <p> + That something unrevealed disturbed the soul, + </p> + <p> + And o'er her mind had absolute control. + </p> + <p> + Whatever presents Constance might receive, + </p> + <p> + Still pensive sighs her breast appeared to heave: + </p> + <p> + Her tints of beauty too, began to fail, + </p> + <p> + And o'er the rose, the lily to prevail. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ONE night Camillus had a party met, + </p> + <p> + Of youthful beaux and belles, a charming set, + </p> + <p> + And, 'mong the rest, fair Constance was a guest; + </p> + <p> + The evening passed in jollity and jest; + </p> + <p> + For few to holy converse seemed inclined, + </p> + <p> + And none for Methodists appeared designed: + </p> + <p> + Not one, but Constance, deaf to wit was found, + </p> + <p> + And, on her, raillery went briskly round. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE supper o'er the company withdrew, + </p> + <p> + But Constance suddenly was lost to view; + </p> + <p> + Beside a certain bed she took her seat, + </p> + <p> + Where no one ever dreamed she would retreat, + </p> + <p> + And all supposed, that ill, or spirits weak, + </p> + <p> + She home had run, or something wished to seek. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE company retired, Camillus said, + </p> + <p> + He meant to write before he went to bed, + </p> + <p> + And told his valet he might go to rest + </p> + <p> + A lucky circumstance, it is confessed. + </p> + <p> + Thus left alone, and as the belle desired; + </p> + <p> + Who, from her soul, the spark so much admired; + </p> + <p> + Yet knew not how the subject to disclose, + </p> + <p> + Or, in what way her wishes to propose; + </p> + <p> + At length, with trembling accents, she revealed; + </p> + <p> + The flame she longer could not keep concealed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20156m.jpg" alt="20156m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20156.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + EXCEEDINGLY surprised Camillus seemed, + </p> + <p> + And scarcely could believe but what he dreamed; + </p> + <p> + Why, hey! said he, good lady, is it thus, + </p> + <p> + With favoured friends, you doubtful points discuss? + </p> + <p> + He made her sit, and then his seat regained + </p> + <p> + Who would have thought, cried he, you here remained; + </p> + <p> + Now who this hiding place to you could tell? + </p> + <p> + 'Twas LOVE, fond LOVE! replied the beauteous belle; + </p> + <p> + And straight a blush her lovely cheek suffused, + </p> + <p> + So rare with those to Cyprian revels used; + </p> + <p> + For Venus's vot'ries, to pranks resigned, + </p> + <p> + Another way, to get a colour, find. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + CAMILLUS, truly, some suspicions had, + </p> + <p> + That he was loved, though neither fool nor mad; + </p> + <p> + Nor such a novice in the Paphian scene, + </p> + <p> + But what he could at once some notions glean: + </p> + <p> + More certain tokens, howsoe'er, to get, + </p> + <p> + And set the lady's feelings on the fret, + </p> + <p> + By trying if the gloom that o'er her reigned + </p> + <p> + Was only sly pretence, he coldness feigned. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SHE often sighed as if her heart would break; + </p> + <p> + At length love's piercing anguish made her speak: + </p> + <p> + What you will say, cried she, I cannot guess, + </p> + <p> + To see me thus a fervent flame confess. + </p> + <p> + The very thought my face with crimson dyes; + </p> + <p> + My way of life no shield for this supplies; + </p> + <p> + The moment pure affection 's in the soul, + </p> + <p> + No longer wanton freaks the mind control. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + MY conduct to excuse, what can I say? + </p> + <p> + O could my former life be done away, + </p> + <p> + And in your recollection naught remain, + </p> + <p> + But what might virtuous constancy maintain + </p> + <p> + At all event, my frankness overlook, + </p> + <p> + Too well I see, the fatal path I took + </p> + <p> + Has such displeasure to your breast conveyed, + </p> + <p> + My zeal will rather hurt than give me aid; + </p> + <p> + But hurt or not, I'll idolize you still: + </p> + <p> + Beat, drive away, contemn me as you will; + </p> + <p> + Or worse, if you the torment can contrive + </p> + <p> + I'm your's alone, Camillus, while alive. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TO this harangue the wary youth replied + </p> + <p> + In truth, fair lady, I could ne'er decide, + </p> + <p> + To criticise what others round may do.— + </p> + <p> + 'Tis not the line I'd willingly pursue; + </p> + <p> + And I will freely say, that your discourse + </p> + <p> + Has much surprised me, though 'tis void of force. + </p> + <p> + To you it surely never can belong, + </p> + <p> + To say variety in love is wrong; + </p> + <p> + Besides, your sex, and decency, 'tis clear, + </p> + <p> + To ev'ry disadvantage you appear. + </p> + <p> + What use this eloquence, and what your aim? + </p> + <p> + Such charms alone as your's could me inflame; + </p> + <p> + Their pow'r is great, but fully I declare, + </p> + <p> + I do not like advances from the FAIR. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20160m.jpg" alt="20160m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20160.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + To Constance this a thunder-clap appeared; + </p> + <p> + Howe'er, she in her purpose persevered. + </p> + <p> + Said she, this treatment doubtless I deserve; + </p> + <p> + But still, from truth my tongue can never swerve, + </p> + <p> + And if I may presume my thoughts to speak, + </p> + <p> + The plan which I've pursued your love to seek, + </p> + <p> + Had never proved injurious to my cause, + </p> + <p> + If still my beauty merited applause. + </p> + <p> + From what you've said, and what your looks express + </p> + <p> + To please your sight, no charms I now possess. + </p> + <p> + Whence comes this change?—to you I will refer; + </p> + <p> + Till now I was admired, you must aver; + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry one my person highly praised; + </p> + <p> + These precious gifts, that admiration raised, + </p> + <p> + Alas! are fled, and since I felt LOVE'S flame, + </p> + <p> + Experience whispers, I'm no more the same; + </p> + <p> + No longer have charms that please your eyes: + </p> + <p> + How happy I should feel if they'd suffice! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE suppliant belle now hoped to be allowed + </p> + <p> + One half his bed to whom her sighs were vowed; + </p> + <p> + But terror closed her lips; she nothing said, + </p> + <p> + Though oft her eyes were to his pillow led. + </p> + <p> + To be confused the wily stripling feigned, + </p> + <p> + And like a statue for a time remained. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT length he said:—I know not what to do; + </p> + <p> + Undressing, by myself, I can't pursue. + </p> + <p> + Shall I your valet call? rejoined the fair; + </p> + <p> + On no account, said he, with looks of care; + </p> + <p> + I would not have you in my chamber seen, + </p> + <p> + Nor thought that here, by night, a girl had been, + </p> + <p> + Your caution is enough, the belle replied: + </p> + <p> + Myself between the wall and bed I'll hide, + </p> + <p> + 'Twill what you fear prevent, and ills avoid; + </p> + <p> + But bolt the door: you'll then be not annoyed; + </p> + <p> + Let no one come; for once I'll do my best, + </p> + <p> + And as your valet act till you're undressed; + </p> + <p> + To am'rous Constance this permission grant + </p> + <p> + The honour would her throbbing breast enchant. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE youth to her proposal gave consent, + </p> + <p> + And Constance instantly to business went; + </p> + <p> + The means she used to take his clothes were such, + </p> + <p> + That scarcely once his person felt her touch; + </p> + <p> + She stopt not there, but even freely chose + </p> + <p> + To take from off his feet, both shoes and hose + </p> + <p> + What, say you:—With her hands did Constance this? + </p> + <p> + Pray tell me what you see therein amiss? + </p> + <p> + I wish sincerely I could do the same, + </p> + <p> + With one for whom I feel a tender flame. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BETWEEN the clothes in haste Camillus flew, + </p> + <p> + Without inviting Constance to pursue. + </p> + <p> + She thought at first he meant to try her love; + </p> + <p> + But raillery, this conduct was above. + </p> + <p> + His aim, howe'er more fully to unfold, + </p> + <p> + She presently observed:—'Tis very cold; + </p> + <p> + Where shall I sleep? said she: <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + CAMILLUS <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + Just where you please; <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + CONSTANCE <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + What, on this chair? <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + CAMILLUS <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + No, no, be more at ease; + </p> + <p> + Come into bed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + CONSTANCE <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + Unlace me then, I pray. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + CAMILLUS <br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + I cannot: I'm undressed, and cold as clay: + </p> + <p> + Unlace yourself.— <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + Just then the belle perceived + </p> + <p> + A poinard, which anxiety relieved; + </p> + <p> + She drew it from the scabbard, cut her lace, + </p> + <p> + And many parts of dress designed for grace, + </p> + <p> + The works of months, embroidery and flow'r + </p> + <p> + Now perished in the sixtieth of an hour, + </p> + <p> + Without regret, or seeming to lament, + </p> + <p> + What more than life will of the sex content. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + YE dames of Britain, Germany, or France, + </p> + <p> + Would you have done as much, through complaisance? + </p> + <p> + You would not, I'm convinced: the thing is clear; + </p> + <p> + But doubtless this, at Rome, must fine appear. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + POOR Constance softly to the bed approached, + </p> + <p> + No longer now supposing she encroached, + </p> + <p> + And trusting that, no stratagem again + </p> + <p> + Would be contrived to give her bosom pain. + </p> + <p> + Camillus said: my sentiments I'll speak; + </p> + <p> + Dissimulation I will never seek; + </p> + <p> + She who can proffer what should be denied, + </p> + <p> + Shall never be admitted by my side; + </p> + <p> + But if the place your approbation meet, + </p> + <p> + I won't refuse your lying at my feet. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + FAIR Constance such reproof could not withstand, + </p> + <p> + 'Twas well the poinard was not in her hand; + </p> + <p> + Her bosom so severely felt the smart, + </p> + <p> + She would have plunged the dagger through her heart: + </p> + <p> + But Hope, sweet Hope! still fluttered to her view; + </p> + <p> + And young Camillus pretty well she knew; + </p> + <p> + Howe'er with such severity he spoke, + </p> + <p> + That e'en the mildest saint it would provoke; + </p> + <p> + Yet, in a swain so easy, gentle, kind, + </p> + <p> + 'Twas strange so little lenity to find. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SHE placed herself, as order'd, cross the bed, + </p> + <p> + And at his feet at length reclined her head; + </p> + <p> + A kiss on them she ventured to impress, + </p> + <p> + But not too roughly, lest she should transgress: + </p> + <p> + We may conjecture if he were at ease; + </p> + <p> + What victory! to see her stoop to please; + </p> + <p> + A beauty so renowned for charms and pride, + </p> + <p> + 'Twould take a week, to note each trait described; + </p> + <p> + No other fault than paleness he could trace, + </p> + <p> + Which gave her (causes known) still higher grace. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + CAMILLUS stretched his legs, and on her breast + </p> + <p> + Familiarly allowed his feet to rest; + </p> + <p> + A cushion made of what so fair appeared, + </p> + <p> + That envy might from ivory be feared; + </p> + <p> + Then seemed as if to Morpheus he inclined, + </p> + <p> + And on the pillow sullenly resigned. + </p> + <p> + At last the sighs with which her bosom heaved, + </p> + <p> + Gave vent to floods of tears that much relieved; + </p> + <p> + This was the end:—Camillus silence broke, + </p> + <p> + And to tell the belle with pleasing accents spoke + </p> + <p> + I'm satisfied, said he, your love is pure; + </p> + <p> + Come hither charming girl and be secure. + </p> + <p> + She t'wards him moved; Camillus near her slid; + </p> + <p> + Could you, cried he, believe that what I did, + </p> + <p> + Was seriously the dictates of my soul, + </p> + <p> + To act the brute and ev'ry way control? + </p> + <p> + No, no, sweet fair, you know me not 'tis plain: + </p> + <p> + I truly wish your fondest love to gain; + </p> + <p> + Your heart I've probed, 'tis all that I desire; + </p> + <p> + Mid joys I swim; my bosom feels the fire. + </p> + <p> + Your rigour now in turn you may display; + </p> + <p> + It is but fair: be bountiful I pray; + </p> + <p> + Myself from hence your lover I declare; + </p> + <p> + No woman merits more my bed to share, + </p> + <p> + Whatever rank, or beauty, sense or life, + </p> + <p> + You equally deserve to be my wife; + </p> + <p> + Your husband I'll become; forget the past; + </p> + <p> + Unpleasant recollections should not last. + </p> + <p> + Yet there's one thing which much I wish to speak + </p> + <p> + The marriage must be secret that we seek; + </p> + <p> + There's no occasion reasons to disclose; + </p> + <p> + What I have said I trust will you dispose, + </p> + <p> + To act as I desire: you'll find it best:— + </p> + <p> + A wedding 's like amours while unconfessed; + </p> + <p> + One THEN both husband and gallant appears, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry wily act the bosom cheers. + </p> + <p> + Till we, continued he, a priest can find, + </p> + <p> + Are you, to trust my promises inclined? + </p> + <p> + You safely may; he'll to his word adhere: + </p> + <p> + His heart is honest, and his tongue sincere. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TO this fair Constance answered not a word, + </p> + <p> + Which showed, with him, her sentiments concurred. + </p> + <p> + The spark, no novice in the dumb assent, + </p> + <p> + Received her silence fully as 'twas meant; + </p> + <p> + The rest involved in myst'ry deep remains; + </p> + <p> + Thus Constance was requitted for her pains. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + YE Cyprian nymphs to profit turn my tale; + </p> + <p> + The god of LOVE, within his vot'ries pale, + </p> + <p> + Has many, if their sentiments were known, + </p> + <p> + That I'd prefer for Hymen's joys alone. + </p> + <p> + My wife, not always to the spindle true, + </p> + <p> + Will many things in life, not seem to view; + </p> + <p> + By Constance and her conduct you may see + </p> + <p> + How, with this theory, her acts agree; + </p> + <p> + She proved the truth of what I here advance, + </p> + <p> + And reaped the fruits produced by complaisance, + </p> + <p> + A horde of nuns I know who, ev'ry night, + </p> + <p> + Would such adventures wage with fond delight. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + PERHAPS it will not be with ease believed, + </p> + <p> + That Constance from Camillus now received, + </p> + <p> + A proof of LOVE'S enchanting balmy sweet, + </p> + <p> + A proof perhaps you'll think her used to meet; + </p> + <p> + But ne'er till then she tasted pleasures pure; + </p> + <p> + Her former life no blisses could secure. + </p> + <p> + You ask the cause, and signs of doubt betray: + </p> + <p> + Who TRULY loves, the same will ever say. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Nicaise" id="Nicaise"></a>NICAISE + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20168m.jpg" alt="20168m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20168.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">T</span>O serve the shop as 'prentice was the lot; + </p> + <p> + Of one who had the name of Nicaise got; + </p> + <p> + A lad quite ignorant beyond his trade, + </p> + <p> + And what arithmetick might lend him aid; + </p> + <p> + A perfect novice in the wily art, + </p> + <p> + That in amours is used to win the heart. + </p> + <p> + Good tradesmen formerly were late to learn + </p> + <p> + The tricks that soon in friars we discern; + </p> + <p> + They ne'er were known those lessons to begin, + </p> + <p> + Till more than down appeared upon the chin. + </p> + <p> + But now-a-days, in practice, 'tis confessed, + </p> + <p> + These shopkeepers are knowing as the best. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR lad of ancient date was less advanced; + </p> + <p> + At scenes of love his eyes had never glanced; + </p> + <p> + Be that as 'twill, he now was in the way, + </p> + <p> + And naught but want of wit produced delay: + </p> + <p> + A belle indeed had on him set her heart + </p> + <p> + His master's daughter felt LOVE'S poignant smart; + </p> + <p> + A girl of most engaging mind and mien, + </p> + <p> + And always steady in her conduct seen. + </p> + <p> + Sincerity of soul or humour free, + </p> + <p> + Or whether with her taste it might agree, + </p> + <p> + A fool 'twas clear presided o'er her soul, + </p> + <p> + And all her thoughts and actions felt control. + </p> + <p> + Some bold gallant would p'erhaps inform her plain, + </p> + <p> + She ever kept wild Folly in her train, + </p> + <p> + And nothing say to me who tales relate; + </p> + <p> + But oft on reason such proceedings wait. + </p> + <p> + If you a goddess love, advance she'll make; + </p> + <p> + Our belle the same advantages would take. + </p> + <p> + Her fortune, wit, and charm, attention drew, + </p> + <p> + And many sparks would anxiously pursue; + </p> + <p> + How happy he who should her heart obtain, + </p> + <p> + And Hymen prove he had not sighed in vain! + </p> + <p> + But she had promised, to the modest youth, + </p> + <p> + Who first was named, her confidence and truth; + </p> + <p> + The little god of pleasing soft desire + </p> + <p> + With full compliance with his whims require. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THe belle was pleased the 'prentice to prefer: + </p> + <p> + A handsome lad with truth we may aver, + </p> + <p> + Quite young, well made, with fascinating eye: + </p> + <p> + Such charms are ne'er despised we may rely, + </p> + <p> + But treasures thought, no FAIR will e'er neglect; + </p> + <p> + Whate'er her senses say, she'll these respect. + </p> + <p> + For one that LOVE lays hold of by the soul, + </p> + <p> + A thousand by the eyes receive control. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS sprightly girl with soft endearing ease, + </p> + <p> + Exerted ev'ry care the lad to please, + </p> + <p> + To his regards she never shy appeared; + </p> + <p> + Now pinched his arm, then smiled and often leered; + </p> + <p> + Her hand across his eyes would sometimes put; + </p> + <p> + At others try to step upon his foot. + </p> + <p> + To this he nothing offered in reply, + </p> + <p> + Though oft his throbbing bosom heaved a sigh. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + So many tender scenes, at length we find, + </p> + <p> + Produced the explanation LOVE designed; + </p> + <p> + The youthful couple, we may well believe, + </p> + <p> + Would from each other mutual vows receive; + </p> + <p> + They neither promises nor kisses spared, + </p> + <p> + Incalculable were the numbers shared; + </p> + <p> + If he had tried to keep exact account, + </p> + <p> + He soon had been bewildered with th' amount; + </p> + <p> + To such infinity it clearly ran, + </p> + <p> + Mistakes would rise if he pursued the plan; + </p> + <p> + A ceremony solely was required, + </p> + <p> + Which prudent girls have always much admired, + </p> + <p> + Yet this to wait gave pain and made her grieve; + </p> + <p> + From you, said she, the boon I would receive; + </p> + <p> + Or while I live the rapture never know, + </p> + <p> + That Hymen at his altar can bestow; + </p> + <p> + To you I promise, by the pow'rs divine, + </p> + <p> + My hand and heart I truly will resign. + </p> + <p> + Howe'er I'll freely say, should Hymen fail + </p> + <p> + To make me your's and wishes not prevail, + </p> + <p> + You must not fancy I'll become a nun, + </p> + <p> + Though much I hope to act as I've begun; + </p> + <p> + To marry you would please me to the soul; + </p> + <p> + But how can WE the ruling pow'rs control? + </p> + <p> + Too much I'm confident you love my fame, + </p> + <p> + To aim at what might bring me soon to shame: + </p> + <p> + In wedlock I've been asked by that and this; + </p> + <p> + My father thinks these offers not amiss; + </p> + <p> + But, Nicaise, I'll allow you still to hope, + </p> + <p> + That if with others I'm obliged to cope, + </p> + <p> + No matter whether counsellor or judge. + </p> + <p> + Since clearly ev'ry thing to such I grudge, + </p> + <p> + The marriage eve, or morn, or day, or hour, + </p> + <p> + To you I'll give—the first enchanting flow'r. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE lad most gratefully his thanks returned; + </p> + <p> + His breast with ev'ry soft emotion burned. + </p> + <p> + Within a week, to this sweet charmer came, + </p> + <p> + A rich young squire, who soon declared his flame; + </p> + <p> + On which she said to Nicaise:—he will do; + </p> + <p> + This spark will easily let matters through; + </p> + <p> + And as the belle was confident of that, + </p> + <p> + She gave consent and listened to his chat. + </p> + <p> + Soon all was settled and arranged the day, + </p> + <p> + When marriage they no longer would delay, + </p> + <p> + You'll fully notice this:—I think I view + </p> + <p> + The thoughts which move around and you pursue; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas doubtless clear, whatever bliss in store, + </p> + <p> + The lady was betrothed, and nothing more. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THOUGH all was fixed a week before the day, + </p> + <p> + Yet fearing accidents might things delay, + </p> + <p> + Or even break the treaty ere complete, + </p> + <p> + She would not our apprentice fully greet, + </p> + <p> + Till on the very morn she gave her hand, + </p> + <p> + Lest chance defeated what was nicely planned. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HOWE'ER the belle was to the altar led, + </p> + <p> + A virgin still, and doomed the squire to wed, + </p> + <p> + Who, quite impatient, consummation sought, + </p> + <p> + As soon as he the charmer back had brought; + </p> + <p> + But she solicited the day apart, + </p> + <p> + And this obtained, alone by prayers and art. + </p> + <p> + 'Twas early morn, and 'stead of bed she dressed, + </p> + <p> + In ev'ry thing a queen had thought the best; + </p> + <p> + With diamonds, pearls, and various jewels rare; + </p> + <p> + Her husband riches had, she was aware, + </p> + <p> + Which raised her into rank that dress required, + </p> + <p> + And all her neighbours envied and admired. + </p> + <p> + Her lover, to secure the promised bliss, + </p> + <p> + An hour's indulgence gained to take a kiss. + </p> + <p> + A bow'r within a garden was the spot, + </p> + <p> + Which, for their private meeting, they had got. + </p> + <p> + A confidant had been employed around, + </p> + <p> + To watch if any one were lurking found. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE lady was the first who thither came; + </p> + <p> + To get a nosegay was, she said, her aim; + </p> + <p> + And Nicaise presently her steps pursued, + </p> + <p> + Who, when the turf within the bow'r he viewed, + </p> + <p> + Exclaimed, oh la! how wet it is my dear! + </p> + <p> + Your handsome clothes will be spoiled I fear! + </p> + <p> + A carpet let me instantly provide? + </p> + <p> + Deuce take the clothes! the fair with anger cried; + </p> + <p> + Ne'er think of that: I'll say I had a fall; + </p> + <p> + Such accident a loss I would not call, + </p> + <p> + When Time so clearly on the wing appears, + </p> + <p> + 'Tis right to banish scruples, cares, and fears; + </p> + <p> + Nor think of clothes nor dress, however fine, + </p> + <p> + But those to dirt or flames at once resign; + </p> + <p> + Far better this than precious time to waste, + </p> + <p> + Since frequently in minutes bliss we taste; + </p> + <p> + A quarter of an hour we now should prize, + </p> + <p> + The place no doubt will very well suffice; + </p> + <p> + With you it rests such moments to employ, + </p> + <p> + And mutually our bosoms fill with joy. + </p> + <p> + I scarcely ought to say what now I speak, + </p> + <p> + But anxiously your happiness I seek. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20176m.jpg" alt="20176m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20176.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + INDEED, the anxious, tender youth replied, + </p> + <p> + To save such costly clothes we should decide; + </p> + <p> + I'll run at once, and presently be here; + </p> + <p> + Two minutes will suffice I'm very clear. + </p> + <p> + AWAY the silly lad with ardour flew, + </p> + <p> + And left no time objections to renew. + </p> + <p> + His wondrous folly cured the charming dame; + </p> + <p> + Whose soul so much disdained her recent flame; + </p> + <p> + That instantly her heart resumed its place, + </p> + <p> + Which had too long been loaded with disgrace: + </p> + <p> + Go, prince of fools, she to herself exclaimed, + </p> + <p> + For ever, of thy conduct, be ashamed; + </p> + <p> + To lose thee surely I can ne'er regret, + </p> + <p> + Impossible a worse I could have met. + </p> + <p> + I've now considered, and 'tis very plain, + </p> + <p> + Thou merit'st not such favours to obtain; + </p> + <p> + From hence I swear, by ev'ry thing above; + </p> + <p> + My husband shall alone possess my love; + </p> + <p> + And least I might be tempted to betray, + </p> + <p> + To him I'll instantly the boon convey, + </p> + <p> + Which Nicaise might have easily received; + </p> + <p> + Thank Heav'n my breast from folly is relieved. + </p> + <p> + This said, by disappointment rendered sour, + </p> + <p> + The beauteous bride in anger left the bow'r. + </p> + <p> + Soon with the carpet simple Nicaise came, + </p> + <p> + And found that things no longer were the same. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE lucky hour, ye suitors learn I pray, + </p> + <p> + Is not each time the clock strikes through the day, + </p> + <p> + In Cupid's alphabet I think I've read, + </p> + <p> + Old Time, by lovers, likes not to be led; + </p> + <p> + And since so closely he pursues his plan, + </p> + <p> + 'Tis right to seize him, often as you can. + </p> + <p> + Delays are dangerous, in love or war, + </p> + <p> + And Nicaise is a proof they fortune mar. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + QUITE out of breath with having quickly run; + </p> + <p> + Delighted too that he so soon had done, + </p> + <p> + The youth returned most anxious to employ, + </p> + <p> + The carpet for his mistress to enjoy, + </p> + <p> + But she alas! with rage upon her brow, + </p> + <p> + Had left the spot, he knew not why nor how; + </p> + <p> + And to her company returned in haste + </p> + <p> + The flame extinguished that her mind disgraced. + </p> + <p> + Perhaps she went the jewel to bestow, + </p> + <p> + Upon her spouse, whose breast with joy would glow: + </p> + <p> + What jewel pray?—The one that ev'ry maid + </p> + <p> + Pretends to have, whatever tricks she's played. + </p> + <p> + This I believe; but I'll no dangers run; + </p> + <p> + To burn my fingers I've not yet begun; + </p> + <p> + Yet I allow, howe'er, in such a case, + </p> + <p> + The girl, who fibs, therein no sin can trace. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR belle who, thanks to Nicaise, yet retained; + </p> + <p> + In spite of self, the flow'r he might have gained, + </p> + <p> + Was grumbling still, when he the lady met + </p> + <p> + Why, how is this, cried he, did you forget, + </p> + <p> + That for this carpet I had gone away? + </p> + <p> + When spread, how nicely on it we might play! + </p> + <p> + You'd soon to woman change the silly maid; + </p> + <p> + Come, let's return, and not the bliss evade; + </p> + <p> + No fear of dirt nor spoiling of your dress; + </p> + <p> + And then my love I fully will express. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NOT so, replied the disappointed dame, + </p> + <p> + We'll put it off:—perhaps 'twould hurt your frame + </p> + <p> + Your health I value, and I would advise, + </p> + <p> + To be at ease, take breath, and prudence prize; + </p> + <p> + Apprentice in a shop you now are bound + </p> + <p> + Next 'prentice go to some gallant around; + </p> + <p> + You'll not so soon his pleasing art require, + </p> + <p> + Nor to your tutorage can I now aspire. + </p> + <p> + Friend Nicaise take some neighb'ring servant maid, + </p> + <p> + You're quite a master in the shopping trade; + </p> + <p> + Stuffs you can sell, and ask the highest price; + </p> + <p> + And to advantage turn things in a trice. + </p> + <p> + But opportunity you can't discern; + </p> + <p> + To know its value,—prithee go and learn. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Progress_of_Wit" id="Progress_of_Wit"></a>THE PROGRESS OF WIT + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20180m.jpg" alt="20180m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20180.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">D</span>IVERTING in extreme there is a play, + </p> + <p> + Which oft resumes its fascinating sway; + </p> + <p> + Delights the sex, or ugly, fair, or sour; + </p> + <p> + By night or day:—'tis sweet at any hour. + </p> + <p> + The frolick, ev'ry where is known to fame; + </p> + <p> + Conjecture if you can, and tells its name. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS play's chief charm to husbands is unknown; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis with the lover it excels alone; + </p> + <p> + No lookers-on, as umpires, are required; + </p> + <p> + No quarrels rise, though each appears inspired; + </p> + <p> + All seem delighted with the pleasing game:— + </p> + <p> + Conjecture if you can, and tell its name. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BE this as 'twill, and called whate'er it may; + </p> + <p> + No longer trifling with it I shall stay, + </p> + <p> + But now disclose a method to transmit + </p> + <p> + (As oft we find) to ninnies sense and wit. + </p> + <p> + Till Alice got instruction in this school, + </p> + <p> + She was regarded as a silly fool, + </p> + <p> + Her exercise appeared to spin and sew:— + </p> + <p> + Not hers indeed, the hands alone would go; + </p> + <p> + For sense or wit had in it no concern; + </p> + <p> + Whate'er the foolish girl had got to learn, + </p> + <p> + No part therein could ever take the mind; + </p> + <p> + Her doll, for thought, was just as well designed. + </p> + <p> + The mother would, a hundred times a day, + </p> + <p> + Abuse the stupid maid, and to her say + </p> + <p> + Go wretched lump and try some wit to gain. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE girl, quite overcome with shame and pain; + </p> + <p> + Her neighbours asked to point her out the spot, + </p> + <p> + Where useful wit by purchase might be got. + </p> + <p> + The simple question laughter raised around; + </p> + <p> + At length they told her, that it might be found + </p> + <p> + With father Bonadventure, who'd a stock, + </p> + <p> + Which he at times disposed of to his flock. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AWAY in haste she to the cloister went, + </p> + <p> + To see the friar she was quite intent, + </p> + <p> + Though trembling lest she might disturb his ease; + </p> + <p> + And one of his high character displease. + </p> + <p> + The girl exclaimed, as on she moved,—Will he + </p> + <p> + Such presents willingly bestow on me, + </p> + <p> + Whose age, as yet, has scarcely reached fifteen? + </p> + <p> + With such can I be worthy to be seen? + </p> + <p> + Her innocence much added to her charms, + </p> + <p> + The gentle wily god of soft alarms + </p> + <p> + Had not a youthful maiden in his book, + </p> + <p> + That carried more temptation in her look. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + MOST rev'rend sir, said she, by friends I'm told, + </p> + <p> + That in this convent wit is often sold, + </p> + <p> + Will you allow me some on trust to take? + </p> + <p> + My treasure won't afford that much I stake; + </p> + <p> + I can return if more I should require; + </p> + <p> + Howe'er, you'll take this pledge I much desire; + </p> + <p> + On which she tried to give the monk a ring, + </p> + <p> + That to her finger firmly seemed to cling. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BUT when the friar saw the girl's design, + </p> + <p> + He cried, good maid, the pledge we will decline, + </p> + <p> + And what is wished, provide for you the same; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis merchandize, and whatsoe'er its fame, + </p> + <p> + To some 'tis freely giv'n:—to others taught + </p> + <p> + If not too dear, oft better when 'tis bought. + </p> + <p> + Come in and boldly follow where I lead; + </p> + <p> + None round can see: you've nothing here to heed; + </p> + <p> + They're all at prayers; the porter's at my will; + </p> + <p> + The very walls, of prudence have their fill. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SHE entered as the holy monk desired, + </p> + <p> + And they together to his cell retired. + </p> + <p> + The friar on the bed this maiden threw; + </p> + <p> + A kiss would take:—she from him rather drew; + </p> + <p> + And said.—To give one wit is this the way? + </p> + <p> + Yes, answered he, and round her 'gan to play: + </p> + <p> + Upon her bosom then he put his hand + </p> + <p> + What now, said she, am I to understand? + </p> + <p> + Is this the way?—Said he, 'tis so decreed; + </p> + <p> + Then patiently she let the monk proceed, + </p> + <p> + Who followed up, from point to point, his aim; + </p> + <p> + And wit, by easy steps, advancing came, + </p> + <p> + Till its progression with her was complete; + </p> + <p> + Then Alice laughed, success appeared so sweet. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A SECOND dose the friar soon bestowed, + </p> + <p> + And e'en a third, so fast his bounty flowed. + </p> + <p> + Well, said the monk, pray how d'ye find the play? + </p> + <p> + The girl replied: wit will not long delay; + </p> + <p> + 'Twill soon arrive; but then I fear its flight: + </p> + <p> + I'm half afraid 'twill leave me ere 'tis night. + </p> + <p> + We'll see, rejoined the priest, that naught you lose; + </p> + <p> + But other secrets oftentimes we use. + </p> + <p> + Seek not those the smiling girl replied + </p> + <p> + With this most perfectly I'm satisfied; + </p> + <p> + Then be it so, said he, we'll recommence, + </p> + <p> + Nor longer keep the business in suspense, + </p> + <p> + But to the utmost length at once advance; + </p> + <p> + For this fair Alice showed much complaisance: + </p> + <p> + The secret by the friar was renewed; + </p> + <p> + Much pleasure in it Bonadventure viewed; + </p> + <p> + The belle a courtesy dropt, and then retired, + </p> + <p> + Reflecting on the wit she had acquired; + </p> + <p> + Reflecting, do you say?—To think inclined? + </p> + <p> + Yes, even more:—she sought excuse to find, + </p> + <p> + Not doubting that she should be forced to say, + </p> + <p> + Some cause for keeping her so long away. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TWO days had passed, when came a youthful friend; + </p> + <p> + Fair Nancy with her often would unbend; + </p> + <p> + Howe'er, so very thoughtful Alice seemed, + </p> + <p> + That Nancy (who was penetrating deemed) + </p> + <p> + Was well convinced whatever Alice sought, + </p> + <p> + So very absent she was not for naught. + </p> + <p> + In questioning she managed with such art, + </p> + <p> + That soon she learned—what Alice could impart + </p> + <p> + To listen she was thoroughly disposed, + </p> + <p> + While t'other ev'ry circumstance disclosed, + </p> + <p> + From first to last, each point and mystick hit, + </p> + <p> + And e'en the largeness of the friar's wit, + </p> + <p> + The repetitions, and the wondrous skill + </p> + <p> + With which he managed ev'ry thing at will. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BUT now, cried Alice, favour me I pray, + </p> + <p> + And tell at once, without reserve, the way + </p> + <p> + That you obtained such wit as you possess, + </p> + <p> + And all particulars to me confess. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IF I, said Nancy, must avow the truth, + </p> + <p> + Your brother Alan was the bounteous youth, + </p> + <p> + Who me obliged therewith, and freely taught, + </p> + <p> + What from the holy friar you'd have bought. + </p> + <p> + My brother Alan!—Alan! Alice cried; + </p> + <p> + He ne'er with any was himself supplied; + </p> + <p> + I'm all surprise; he's thought a heavy clot, + </p> + <p> + How could he give what he had never got? <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + FOOL! said the other, little thou can'st know; + </p> + <p> + For once, to me some information owe; + </p> + <p> + In such a case much skill is not required, + </p> + <p> + And Alan freely gave what I desired. + </p> + <p> + If me thou disbeliev'st, thy mother ask; + </p> + <p> + She thoroughly can undertake the task. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ON such a point we readily should say, + </p> + <p> + Long live the fools who wit so well display! <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Sick_Abbess" id="Sick_Abbess"></a>THE SICK ABBESS + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20189m.jpg" alt="20189m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20189.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">E</span>XAMPLE often proves of sov'reign use; + </p> + <p> + At other times it cherishes abuse; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis not my purpose, howsoe'er, to tell + </p> + <p> + Which of the two I fancy to excel. + </p> + <p> + Some will conceive the Abbess acted right, + </p> + <p> + While others think her conduct very light + </p> + <p> + Be that as 'twill, her actions right or wrong, + </p> + <p> + I'll freely give a license to my tongue, + </p> + <p> + Or pen, at all events, and clearly show, + </p> + <p> + By what some nuns were led to undergo, + </p> + <p> + That flocks are equally of flesh and blood, + </p> + <p> + And, if one passes, hundreds stem the flood, + </p> + <p> + To follow up the course the first has run, + </p> + <p> + And imitate what t'other has begun. + </p> + <p> + When Agnes passed, another sister came, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry nun desired to do the same; + </p> + <p> + At length the guardian of the flock appeared, + </p> + <p> + And likewise passed, though much at first she feared. + </p> + <p> + The tale is this, we purpose to relate; + </p> + <p> + And full particulars we now will state. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AN Abbess once a certain illness had, + </p> + <p> + Chlorosis named, which oft proves very bad, + </p> + <p> + Destroys the rose that decorates the cheek, + </p> + <p> + And renders females languid, pale, and weak. + </p> + <p> + Our lady's face was like a saint's in Lent: + </p> + <p> + Quite wan, though otherwise it marked content. + </p> + <p> + The faculty, consulted on her case, + </p> + <p> + And who the dire disorder's source would trace, + </p> + <p> + At length pronounced slow fever must succeed, + </p> + <p> + And death inevitably be decreed, + </p> + <p> + Unless;—but this unless is very strange + </p> + <p> + Unless indeed she some way could arrange; + </p> + <p> + To gratify her wish, which seemed to vex, + </p> + <p> + And converse be allowed with t'other sex: + </p> + <p> + Hippocrates, howe'er, more plainly speaks, + </p> + <p> + No circumlocutory phrase he seeks. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + O JESUS! quite abashed the Abbess cried; + </p> + <p> + What is it?—fy!—a man would you provide? + </p> + <p> + Yes, they rejoined, 'tis clearly what you want, + </p> + <p> + And you will die without a brisk gallant; + </p> + <p> + One truly able will alone suffice; + </p> + <p> + And, if not such, take two we would advise. + </p> + <p> + This still was worse, though, if we rightly guess, + </p> + <p> + 'Twas by her wished, durst she the truth confess. + </p> + <p> + But how the sisterhood would see her take + </p> + <p> + Such remedies and no objection make? + </p> + <p> + Shame often causes injury and pain; + </p> + <p> + And ills concealed bring others in their train. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SAID sister Agnes, Madam, take their word; + </p> + <p> + A remedy like this would be absurd, + </p> + <p> + If, like old death, it had a haggard look, + </p> + <p> + And you designed to get by hook or crook. + </p> + <p> + A hundred secrets you retain at ease; + </p> + <p> + Can one so greatly shock and you displease?— + </p> + <p> + You talk at random, Agnes, she replied; + </p> + <p> + Now, would you for the remedy decide, + </p> + <p> + Upon your word, if you were in my place?— + </p> + <p> + Yes, madam, said the nun, and think it grace; + </p> + <p> + Still more I'd do, if necessary thought; + </p> + <p> + Your health, by me, would ev'ry way be sought, + </p> + <p> + And, if required by you to suffer this, + </p> + <p> + Not one around would less appear remiss; + </p> + <p> + Sincere affection for you I have shown, + </p> + <p> + And my regard I'll ever proudly own. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A THOUSAND thanks the Abbess gave her friend; + </p> + <p> + The doctors said:—no use for them to send; + </p> + <p> + Throughout the convent sad distress appeared; + </p> + <p> + When Agnes, who to sage advice adhered, + </p> + <p> + And was not thought the weakest head around, + </p> + <p> + A kinder soul perhaps could not be found, + </p> + <p> + Said to the sisterhood,—What now retains + </p> + <p> + Our worthy Abbess, and her will enchains, + </p> + <p> + Is nothing but the shame of pow'rs divine, + </p> + <p> + Or else, to what's prescribed she would resign. + </p> + <p> + Through charity will no one take the lead, + </p> + <p> + And, by example, get her to proceed? <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE counsel was by ev'ry one approved, + </p> + <p> + And commendation through the circle moved. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IN this design not one, nor grave, nor old, + </p> + <p> + Nor young, nor prioress, at all seemed cold; + </p> + <p> + Notes flew around, and friends of worth and taste, + </p> + <p> + The black, the fair, the brown, appeared in haste; + </p> + <p> + The number was not small, our records say, + </p> + <p> + Not (what might be) appearance of delay, + </p> + <p> + But all most anxious seemed the road to show, + </p> + <p> + And what the Abbess feared, at once to know; + </p> + <p> + None more sincerely 'mong the nuns desired, + </p> + <p> + That shame should not prevent what was required. + </p> + <p> + Nor that the Abbess should, within her soul, + </p> + <p> + Retain what might injuriously control. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NO sooner one among the flock had made + </p> + <p> + The step, of which the Abbess was afraid, + </p> + <p> + But other sisters followed in the train:— + </p> + <p> + Not one behind consented to remain; + </p> + <p> + Each forward pressed, in dread to be the last; + </p> + <p> + At length, from prejudice the Abbess passed; + </p> + <p> + To such examples she at last gave way, + </p> + <p> + And, to a youth, no longer offered nay. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE operation o'er, her lily face + </p> + <p> + Resumed the rose, and ev'ry other grace. + </p> + <p> + O remedy divine, prescription blessed! + </p> + <p> + Thy friendly aid to numbers stands confessed; + </p> + <p> + The friends of thousands, friend of nature too; + </p> + <p> + The friend of all, except where honour 's due. + </p> + <p> + This point of honour is another ill, + </p> + <p> + In which the faculty confess no skill. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHAT ills in life! what mis'ries dire around, + </p> + <p> + While remedies so easy may be found! <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Truckers" id="Truckers"></a>THE TRUCKERS + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20195m.jpg" alt="20195m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20195.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">T</span>HE change of food enjoyment is to man; + </p> + <p> + In this, t'include the woman is my plan. + </p> + <p> + I cannot guess why Rome will not allow + </p> + <p> + Exchange in wedlock, and its leave avow; + </p> + <p> + Not ev'ry time such wishes might arise, + </p> + <p> + But, once in life at least, 'twere not unwise; + </p> + <p> + Perhaps one day we may the boon obtain; + </p> + <p> + Amen, I say: my sentiments are plain; + </p> + <p> + The privilege in France may yet arrive + </p> + <p> + There trucking pleases, and exchanges thrive; + </p> + <p> + The people love variety, we find; + </p> + <p> + And such by heav'n was ere for them designed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ONCE there dwelled, near Rouen, (sapient clime) + </p> + <p> + Two villagers, whose wives were in their prime, + </p> + <p> + And rather pleasing in their shape and mien, + </p> + <p> + For those in whom refinement 's scarcely seen. + </p> + <p> + Each looker-on conceives, LOVE needs not greet + </p> + <p> + Such humble wights, as he would prelates treat. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IT happened, howsoe'er, both weary grown, + </p> + <p> + Of halves that they so long had called their own; + </p> + <p> + One holyday, with them there chanced to drink + </p> + <p> + The village lawyer (bred in Satan's sink); + </p> + <p> + To him, said one of these, with jeering air, + </p> + <p> + Good mister Oudinet, a strange affair + </p> + <p> + Is in my head: you've doubtless often made + </p> + <p> + Variety of contracts; 'tis your trade: + </p> + <p> + Now, cannot you contrive, by one of these, + </p> + <p> + That men should barter wives, like goods, at ease? + </p> + <p> + Our pastor oft his benefice has changed; + </p> + <p> + Is trucking wives less easily arranged? + </p> + <p> + It cannot be, for well I recollect, + </p> + <p> + That Parson Gregory (whom none suspect) + </p> + <p> + Would always say, or much my mem'ry fails, + </p> + <p> + My flock 's my wife: love equally prevails; + </p> + <p> + He changed; let us, good neighbour do the same; + </p> + <p> + With all my heart, said t'other, that's my aim; + </p> + <p> + But well thou know'st that mine's the fairest face, + </p> + <p> + And, Mister Oudinet, since that's the case, + </p> + <p> + Should he not add, at least, his mule to boot? + </p> + <p> + My mule? rejoined the first, that will not suit; + </p> + <p> + In this world ev'ry thing has got its price: + </p> + <p> + Mine I will change for thine and that 's concise. + </p> + <p> + Wives are not viewed so near; naught will I add; + </p> + <p> + Why, neighbour Stephen, dost thou think me mad, + </p> + <p> + To give my mule to boot?—of mules the king; + </p> + <p> + Not e'en an ass I'd to the bargain bring; + </p> + <p> + Change wife for wife, the barter will be fair; + </p> + <p> + Then each will act with t'other on the square. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20199m.jpg" alt="20199m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20199.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + THE village lawyer now the friends addressed: + </p> + <p> + Said he, Antoinetta is confessed + </p> + <p> + To have superior charms to those of Jane; + </p> + <p> + But still, if I may venture to be plain, + </p> + <p> + Not always is the best what meets the eye, + </p> + <p> + For many beauties in concealment lie, + </p> + <p> + Which I prefer; and these are hid with care; + </p> + <p> + Deceptions, too, are practised by the FAIR; + </p> + <p> + Howe'er, we wish the whole to be disclosed, + </p> + <p> + Too much, 'tis said, they must not be exposed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NOW, neighbours, let us fair arrangement make: + </p> + <p> + A pig in poke you'd neither give nor take; + </p> + <p> + Confront these halves in nature's birth-day suit; + </p> + <p> + To neither, then, will you deceit impute. + </p> + <p> + The project was most thoroughly approved; + </p> + <p> + Like inclination both the husbands moved. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ANTOINETTA, said the second spouse, + </p> + <p> + Has neither ill nor scratch her fears to rouse. + </p> + <p> + Jane, cried the first, is ev'ry way complete; + </p> + <p> + No freckles on the skin: as balm she's sweet: + </p> + <p> + Antoinetta is, her spouse replied, + </p> + <p> + Ambrosia ev'ry way: no fault to hide. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SAID t'other:—Don't so confident appear; + </p> + <p> + Thou know'st not Jane: her ways would marble cheer; + </p> + <p> + And there's a play:—thou understand'st no doubt? + </p> + <p> + To this rejoined the second village lout, + </p> + <p> + One diff'rence only have my wife and I: + </p> + <p> + Which plays the prettiest wiles is what we try; + </p> + <p> + Thou'lt very soon of these know how to think; + </p> + <p> + Here's to thee, neighbour; Mister Oud'net, drink; + </p> + <p> + Come, toast Antoinetta; likewise Jane; + </p> + <p> + The mule was granted, and the bargain plain: + </p> + <p> + Our village lawyer promised to prepare, + </p> + <p> + At once, the writings, which would all declare. + </p> + <p> + This Oudinet a good apostle proved + </p> + <p> + Well paid for parchment, or he never moved: + </p> + <p> + By whom was payment made?—by both the dames; + </p> + <p> + On neither husband showed he any claims. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE village clowns some little time supposed + </p> + <p> + That all was secret: not a hint disclosed; + </p> + <p> + The parson of it, howsoe'er, obtained + </p> + <p> + Some intimation, and his off'rings gained. + </p> + <p> + I was not present, fully I admit; + </p> + <p> + But rarely clergymen their dues will quit. + </p> + <p> + The very clerk would not remit his fee:— + </p> + <p> + All those who serve the church in this agree. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE permutation could not well be made, + </p> + <p> + But scandal would such practices upbraid; + </p> + <p> + In country villages each step is seen; + </p> + <p> + Thus, round the whisper went of what had been, + </p> + <p> + And placed at length the thorn where all was ease; + </p> + <p> + The pow'rs divine alone it could displease. + </p> + <p> + 'Twas pleasant them together to behold; + </p> + <p> + The wives, in emulation, were not cold; + </p> + <p> + In easy talk they'd to each other say: + </p> + <p> + How pleasing to exchange from day to day! + </p> + <p> + What think you, neighbour, if, to try our luck, + </p> + <p> + For once we've something new, and valets truck? + </p> + <p> + This last, if made, the secret had respect; + </p> + <p> + The other had at first a good effect. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + FOR one good month the whole proceeded well; + </p> + <p> + But, at the end, disgust dispersed the spell; + </p> + <p> + And neighbour Stephen, as we might suppose, + </p> + <p> + Began dissatisfaction to disclose; + </p> + <p> + Lamented much Antoinetta's stop; + </p> + <p> + No doubt he was a loser by the swop; + </p> + <p> + Yet neighbour Giles expressed extreme regret, + </p> + <p> + That t'other from him ought to boot should get: + </p> + <p> + Howe'er, he would retrucking not consent, + </p> + <p> + So much he otherwise appeared content. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IT happened on a day, as Stephen strayed + </p> + <p> + Within a wood, he saw, beneath a shade, + </p> + <p> + And near the stream, asleep, and quite alone, + </p> + <p> + Antoinetta, whom he wished his own. + </p> + <p> + He near her drew, and waked her with surprise; + </p> + <p> + The change ne'er struck her when she ope'd her eyes; + </p> + <p> + The gay gallant advantage quickly took, + </p> + <p> + And, what he wished, soon placed within his hook. + </p> + <p> + 'Tis said, he found her better than at first; + </p> + <p> + Why so? you ask: was she then at the worst? + </p> + <p> + A curious question, truly, you've designed; + </p> + <p> + In Cupid's am'rous code of laws you'll find— + </p> + <p> + Bread got by stealth, and eat where none can spy, + </p> + <p> + Is better far than what you bake or buy; + </p> + <p> + For proof of this, ask those most learn'd in love + </p> + <p> + Truth we prefer, all other things above; + </p> + <p> + Yet Hymen, and the god of soft desire, + </p> + <p> + How much soe'er their union we admire, + </p> + <p> + Are not designed together bread to bake; + </p> + <p> + In proof, the sleeping scene for instance take. + </p> + <p> + Good cheer was there: each dish was served with taste; + </p> + <p> + The god of love, who often cooks in haste, + </p> + <p> + Most nicely seasoned things to relish well; + </p> + <p> + In this he's thought old Hymen to excel. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ANTOINETTA, to his clasp restored, + </p> + <p> + Our neighbour Stephen, who his wife adored, + </p> + <p> + Quite raw, howe'er, in this, exclaimed apart + </p> + <p> + Friend Giles has surely got some secret art, + </p> + <p> + For now my rib displays superior charms, + </p> + <p> + To what she had, before she left my arms. + </p> + <p> + Let's take her back, and play the Norman trick + </p> + <p> + Deny the whole, and by our priv'lege stick. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IMMEDIATELY he ev'ry effort tried, + </p> + <p> + To get the bargain fully set aside. + </p> + <p> + Giles, much distressed, exerted all his might, + </p> + <p> + To keep his prize, and prove his conduct right. + </p> + <p> + The cause was carried to the bishop's court; + </p> + <p> + Much noise it made, according to report. + </p> + <p> + At length the parliament would hear the claim, + </p> + <p> + And judge a case of such peculiar fame. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE village lawyer, Oudinet, was brought; + </p> + <p> + From him, who drew the contract, truth was sought; + </p> + <p> + There rests the cause, for 'tis of recent date; + </p> + <p> + While undecided, more we cannot state. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HOW silly neighbour Stephen must appear! + </p> + <p> + He went against his int'rest now 'tis clear; + </p> + <p> + For, when superior pleasure he was shown, + </p> + <p> + The fascinating fair was not his own. + </p> + <p> + Good sense would whisper then, 'twere full as well, + </p> + <p> + To let remain with Giles the beauteous belle; + </p> + <p> + Save now and then, within the leafy shade, + </p> + <p> + Where oft Antoinetta visits made, + </p> + <p> + And warbled to the shrubs and trees around; + </p> + <p> + There he might easily the nymph have found, + </p> + <p> + But, if with ease it could not be obtained, + </p> + <p> + Still greater pleasure he would then have gained. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + GO preach me this to silly country louts; + </p> + <p> + These, howsoe'er, had managed well their bouts, + </p> + <p> + It must not be denied, and all was nice; + </p> + <p> + To do the like perhaps 'twill some entice. + </p> + <p> + I much regret my lot was not the same, + </p> + <p> + Though doubtless many will my wishes blame. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Case_of_Conscience" id="Case_of_Conscience"></a>THE CASE OF + CONSCIENCE + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20207m.jpg" alt="20207m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20207.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">T</span>HOSE who in fables deal, bestow at ease + </p> + <p> + Both names and titles, freely as they please. + </p> + <p> + It costs them scarcely any thing, we find. + </p> + <p> + And each is nymph or shepherdess designed; + </p> + <p> + Some e'en are goddesses, that move below, + </p> + <p> + From whom celestial bliss of course must flow. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS Horace followed, with superior art:— + </p> + <p> + If, to the trav'ller's bed, with throbbing heart, + </p> + <p> + The chambermaid approached, 'twas Ilia found, + </p> + <p> + Or fair Egeria, or some nymph renowned. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + GOD, in his goodness, made, one lovely day, + </p> + <p> + Apollo, who directs the lyrick lay, + </p> + <p> + And gave him pow'rs to call and name at will, + </p> + <p> + Like father Adam, with primordial skill. + </p> + <p> + Said he, go, names bestow that please the ear; + </p> + <p> + In ev'ry word let sweetest sound appear. + </p> + <p> + This ancient law then proves, by right divine, + </p> + <p> + WE oft are sponsors to the royal line. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN pleasing tales and fables I endite, + </p> + <p> + I, who in humble verse presume to write, + </p> + <p> + May surely use this privilege of old, + </p> + <p> + And, to my fancy, appellations mould. + </p> + <p> + If I, instead of Anne, should Sylvia say, + </p> + <p> + And Master Thomas (when the case I weigh) + </p> + <p> + Should change to Adamas, the druid sage, + </p> + <p> + Must I a fine or punishment engage? + </p> + <p> + No, surely not:—at present I shall choose + </p> + <p> + Anne and the Parson for my tale to use. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20211m.jpg" alt="20211m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20211.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + WITHIN her village, Anne was thought the belle, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry other charmer to excel. + </p> + <p> + As near a river once she chanced to stray, + </p> + <p> + She saw a youth in Nature's pure array, + </p> + <p> + Who bathed at ease within the gliding stream; + </p> + <p> + The girl was brisk, and worthy of esteem, + </p> + <p> + Her eyes were pleased; the object gave delight; + </p> + <p> + Not one defect could be produced in sight; + </p> + <p> + Already, by the shepherdess adored, + </p> + <p> + If with the belle to pleasing flights he'd soared, + </p> + <p> + The god of love had all they wished concealed + </p> + <p> + None better know what should not be revealed. + </p> + <p> + Anne nothing feared: the willows were her shade, + </p> + <p> + Which, like Venetian blinds, a cov'ring made; + </p> + <p> + Her eyes, howe'er, across had easy view, + </p> + <p> + And, o'er the youth, each beauty could pursue. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SHE back four paces drew, at first, through shame; + </p> + <p> + Then, led by LOVE, eight others forward came; + </p> + <p> + But scruples still arose that ardour foiled, + </p> + <p> + And nearly ey'ry thing had truly spoiled. + </p> + <p> + Anne had a conscience pure as holy fire; + </p> + <p> + But how could she abstain from soft desire? + </p> + <p> + If, in the bosom chance a flame should raise, + </p> + <p> + Is there a pow'r can then subdue the blaze? + </p> + <p> + At first these inclinations she withstood; + </p> + <p> + But doubting soon, how those of flesh and blood + </p> + <p> + Could sins commit by stepping in advance, + </p> + <p> + She took her seat upon the green expanse, + </p> + <p> + And there attentively the lad observed, + </p> + <p> + With eyes that scarcely from him ever swerved. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + PERHAPS you've seen, from Nature, drawings made? + </p> + <p> + Some Eve, or Adam, artists then persuade, + </p> + <p> + In birth-attire to stand within their view, + </p> + <p> + While they with care and taste each trait pursue; + </p> + <p> + And, like our shepherdess, their stations take, + </p> + <p> + A perfect semblance ev'ry way to make. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ANNE in her mem'ry now his image placed; + </p> + <p> + Each line and feature thoroughly she traced, + </p> + <p> + And even now the fair would there remain, + </p> + <p> + If William (so was called this youthful swain) + </p> + <p> + Had not the water left; when she retired, + </p> + <p> + Though scarcely twenty steps from him admired, + </p> + <p> + Who, more alert than usual then appeared, + </p> + <p> + And, by the belle, in silence was revered. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN such sensations once were in the breast, + </p> + <p> + Love there we may believe would hardly rest. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE favours Anne reserved he thought his own, + </p> + <p> + Though expectations oft away have flown. + </p> + <p> + The more of this I think, the less I know; + </p> + <p> + Perhaps one half our bliss to chance we owe! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BE this as 'twill, the conscientious Anne + </p> + <p> + Would nothing venture to regale her man; + </p> + <p> + Howe'er, she stated what had raised her fear, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry thing that made her persevere. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN Easter came, new difficulties rose + </p> + <p> + Then, in confession, ALL she should disclose. + </p> + <p> + Anne, passing peccadillos in review, + </p> + <p> + This case aside, as an intruder threw; + </p> + <p> + But parson Thomas made her all relate; + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry circumstance most clearly state; + </p> + <p> + That he, by knowing fully each defect, + </p> + <p> + Might punishment accordingly direct, + </p> + <p> + In which no father-confessor should err, + </p> + <p> + Who absolution justly would confer. + </p> + <p> + The parson much his penitent abused; + </p> + <p> + Said he, with sensual views to be amused, + </p> + <p> + Is such a sin, 'tis scarcely worse to steal; + </p> + <p> + The sight is just the same as if you feel. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HOWE'ER, the punishment that he imposed + </p> + <p> + Was nothing great:—too slight to be disclosed; + </p> + <p> + Enough to say, that in the country round, + </p> + <p> + The father-confessors, who there abound, + </p> + <p> + As in our own, (perhaps in ev'ry part,) + </p> + <p> + Have devotees, who, when they ought to smart, + </p> + <p> + A tribute pay, according to their lot, + </p> + <p> + And thus indulgences are often got. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS tribute to discharge the current year, + </p> + <p> + Much troubled Anne, and filled her breast with fear, + </p> + <p> + When William, fishing, chanced a pike to hook, + </p> + <p> + And gave it to his dear at once to cook, + </p> + <p> + Who, quite delighted, hastened to the priest, + </p> + <p> + And begged his rev'rence on the fish to feast. + </p> + <p> + The parson with the present much was pleased; + </p> + <p> + A tap upon the shoulder care appeased; + </p> + <p> + And with a smile he to the bringer said + </p> + <p> + This fish, with trifles on the table spread, + </p> + <p> + Will all complete; 'twas holyday we find, + </p> + <p> + When other clergy with our rector dined. + </p> + <p> + Will you still more oblige, the parson cried, + </p> + <p> + And let the fish at home by you be fried? + </p> + <p> + Then bring it here:—my servant's very new, + </p> + <p> + And can't attempt to cook as well as you. + </p> + <p> + Anne hastened back; meanwhile the priests arrived, + </p> + <p> + Much noise, and rout of course, once these were hived; + </p> + <p> + Wines from the vault were brought without delay; + </p> + <p> + Each of the quality would something say. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE dinner served; the dean at table placed; + </p> + <p> + Their conversation various points embraced; + </p> + <p> + To state the whole would clearly endless be; + </p> + <p> + In this no doubt the reader will agree. + </p> + <p> + They changed and changed, and healths went round and round; + </p> + <p> + No time for scandal while such cheer was found; + </p> + <p> + The first and second course away were cleared, + </p> + <p> + Dessert served up, yet still no pike appeared. + </p> + <p> + The dinner o'er without th' expected dish, + </p> + <p> + Or even a shadow of the promised fish. + </p> + <p> + When William learned the present Anne had made, + </p> + <p> + His wish, to have it cancelled, with her weighed. + </p> + <p> + The rector was surprised, you may suppose, + </p> + <p> + And, soon as from the table all arose, + </p> + <p> + He went to Anne, and called her fool and knave, + </p> + <p> + And, in his wrath, could scarcely secrets wave, + </p> + <p> + But nearly her reproached the bathing scene; + </p> + <p> + What, treat, said he, your priest like base and mean? <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ANNE archly answered, with expression neat:— + </p> + <p> + The sight is just the same as if you eat! <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Devil_of_Pope" id="Devil_of_Pope"></a>THE DEVIL OF POPE-FIG + ISLAND + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20217m.jpg" alt="20217m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20217.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">B</span>Y master Francis clearly 'tis expressed: + </p> + <p> + The folks of Papimania are blessed; + </p> + <p> + True sleep for them alone it seems was made + </p> + <p> + With US the copy only has been laid; + </p> + <p> + And by Saint John, if Heav'n my life will spare, + </p> + <p> + I'll see this place where sleeping 's free from care. + </p> + <p> + E'en better still I find, for naught they do: + </p> + <p> + 'Tis that employment always I pursue. + </p> + <p> + Just add thereto a little honest love, + </p> + <p> + And I shall be as easy as a glove. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ON t'other hand an island may be seen, + </p> + <p> + Where all are hated, cursed, and full of spleen. + </p> + <p> + We know them by the thinness of their face + </p> + <p> + Long sleep is quite excluded from their race. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SHOULD you, good reader, any person meet, + </p> + <p> + With rosy, smiling looks, and cheeks replete, + </p> + <p> + The form not clumsy, you may safely say, + </p> + <p> + A Papimanian doubtless I survey. + </p> + <p> + But if, on t'other side, you chance to view, + </p> + <p> + A meagre figure, void of blooming hue, + </p> + <p> + With stupid, heavy eye, and gloomy mien + </p> + <p> + Conclude at once a Pope-figer, you've seen. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + POPE-FIG 'S the name upon an isle bestowed, + </p> + <p> + Where once a fig the silly people showed, + </p> + <p> + As like the pope, and due devotion paid:— + </p> + <p> + By folly, blocks have often gods been made! + </p> + <p> + These islanders were punished for their crime; + </p> + <p> + Naught prospers, Francis tells us, in their clime; + </p> + <p> + To Lucifer was giv'n the hateful spot, + </p> + <p> + And there his country house he now has got. + </p> + <p> + His underlings appear throughout the isle, + </p> + <p> + Rude, wretched, poor, mean, sordid, base, and vile; + </p> + <p> + With tales, and horns, and claws, if we believe, + </p> + <p> + What many say who ought not to deceive. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ONE day it happened that a cunning clown + </p> + <p> + Was by an imp observed, without the town, + </p> + <p> + To turn the earth, which seemed to be accurst, + </p> + <p> + Since ev'ry trench was painful as the first. + </p> + <p> + This youthful devil was a titled lord; + </p> + <p> + In manners simple:—naught to be abhorred; + </p> + <p> + He might, so ignorant, be duped at ease; + </p> + <p> + As yet he'd scarcely ventured to displease: + </p> + <p> + Said he, I'd have thee know, I was not born, + </p> + <p> + Like clods to labour, dig nor sow the corn; + </p> + <p> + A devil thou in me beholdest here, + </p> + <p> + Of noble race: to toil I ne'er appear. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THOU know'st full well, these fields to us belong: + </p> + <p> + The islanders, it seems, had acted wrong; + </p> + <p> + And, for their crimes, the pope withdrew his cares; + </p> + <p> + Our subjects now you live, the law declares; + </p> + <p> + And therefore, fellow, I've undoubted right, + </p> + <p> + To take the produce of this field, at sight; + </p> + <p> + But I am kind, and clearly will decide + </p> + <p> + The year concluded, we'll the fruits divided. + </p> + <p> + What crop, pray tell me, dost thou mean to sow? + </p> + <p> + The clod replied, my lord, what best will grow + </p> + <p> + I think is Tousell; grain of hardy fame; + </p> + <p> + The imp rejoined, I never heard its name; + </p> + <p> + What is it. Tousell, say'st thou?—I agree, + </p> + <p> + If good return, 'twill be the same to me; + </p> + <p> + Work fellow, work; make haste, the ground prepare; + </p> + <p> + To dig and delve should be the rabble's care; + </p> + <p> + Don't think that I will ever lend a hand, + </p> + <p> + Or give the slightest aid to till the land; + </p> + <p> + I've told thee I'm a gentleman by birth, + </p> + <p> + Designed for ease: not doomed to turn the earth. + </p> + <p> + Howe'er I'll now the diff'rent parts allot, + </p> + <p> + And thus divide the produce of the plot:— + </p> + <p> + What shall above the heritage arise, + </p> + <p> + I'll leave to thee; 'twill very well suffice; + </p> + <p> + But what is in the soil shall be my share; + </p> + <p> + To this attend, see ev'ry thing is fair. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS beardless corn when ripe, with joy was reaped, + </p> + <p> + And then the stubble by the roots was heaped, + </p> + <p> + To satisfy the lordly devil's claim, + </p> + <p> + Who thought the seed and root were just the same, + </p> + <p> + And that the ear and stalk were useless parts, + </p> + <p> + Which nothing made if carried to the marts: + </p> + <p> + The labourer his produce housed with care; + </p> + <p> + The other to the market brought his ware, + </p> + <p> + Where ridicule and laughter he received; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas nothing worth, which much his bosom grieved. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + QUITE mortified, the devil quickly went; + </p> + <p> + To seek our clod, and mark his discontent: + </p> + <p> + The fellow had discreetly sold the corn, + </p> + <p> + In straw, unthrashed, and off the money borne, + </p> + <p> + Which he, with ev'ry wily care, concealed; + </p> + <p> + The imp was duped, and nothing was revealed. + </p> + <p> + Said he, thou rascal?—pretty tricks thou'st played; + </p> + <p> + It seems that cheating is thy daily trade; + </p> + <p> + But I'm a noble devil of the court, + </p> + <p> + Who tricking never knew, save by report. + </p> + <p> + What grain dost mean to sow th' ensuing year? + </p> + <p> + The labourer replied, I think it clear, + </p> + <p> + Instead of grain, 'twill better be to chop, + </p> + <p> + And take a carrot, or a turnip crop; + </p> + <p> + You then, my lord, will surely plenty find; + </p> + <p> + And radishes, if you are so inclined. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THESE carrots, radishes, and turnips too, + </p> + <p> + Said t'other, I am led to think will do; + </p> + <p> + My part shall be what 'bove the soil is found: + </p> + <p> + Thine, fellow, what remains within the ground; + </p> + <p> + No war with thee I'll have, unless constrained, + </p> + <p> + And thou hast never yet of me complained. + </p> + <p> + I now shall go and try to tempt a nun, + </p> + <p> + For I'm disposed to have a little fun. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE time arrived again to house the store; + </p> + <p> + The labourer collected as before; + </p> + <p> + Leaves solely to his lordship were assigned, + </p> + <p> + Who sought for those a ready sale to find, + </p> + <p> + But through the market ridicule was heard, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry one around his jest preferred:— + </p> + <p> + Pray, Mister Devil, where d'ye grow these greens? + </p> + <p> + How treasure up returns from your demesnes? <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ENRAGED at what was said, he hurried back, + </p> + <p> + And, on the clown, proposed to make attack, + </p> + <p> + Who, full of joy, was laughing with his wife, + </p> + <p> + And tasting pleasantly the sweets of life. + </p> + <p> + By all the pow'rs of Hell, the demon cried, + </p> + <p> + He shall the forfeit pay, I now decide; + </p> + <p> + A pretty rascal truly, master Phil: + </p> + <p> + Here, pleasures you expect at will, + </p> + <p> + Well, well, proceed; gallant it while allowed; + </p> + <p> + For present I'll remit what I had vowed; + </p> + <p> + A charming lady I'm engaged to meet; + </p> + <p> + She's sometimes willing: then again discreet; + </p> + <p> + But soon as I, in cuckold's row, have placed + </p> + <p> + Her ninny husband, I'll return in haste, + </p> + <p> + And then so thoroughly I'll trim you o'er, + </p> + <p> + Such wily tricks you'll never practise more; + </p> + <p> + We'll see who best can use his claws and nails, + </p> + <p> + And from the fields obtain the richest sales. + </p> + <p> + Corn, carrots, radishes, or what you will:— + </p> + <p> + Crop as you like, and show your utmost skill + </p> + <p> + No stratagems howe'er with culture blend; + </p> + <p> + I'll take my portion from the better end; + </p> + <p> + Within a week, remember, I'll be here, + </p> + <p> + And recollect:—you've every thing to fear. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AMAZED at what the lordly devil said, + </p> + <p> + The clod could naught reply, so great his dread; + </p> + <p> + But at the gasconade Perretta smiled, + </p> + <p> + Who kept his house and weary hours beguiled, + </p> + <p> + A sprightly clever lass, with prying eye, + </p> + <p> + Who, when a shepherdess, could more descry, + </p> + <p> + Than sheep or lambs she watched upon the plain, + </p> + <p> + If other views or points she sought to gain. + </p> + <p> + Said she, weep not, I'll undertake at ease, + </p> + <p> + To gull this novice-devil as I please; + </p> + <p> + He's young and ignorant; has nothing seen; + </p> + <p> + Thee; from his rage, I thoroughly will skreen; + </p> + <p> + My little finger, if I like can show + </p> + <p> + More malice than his head and body know. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE day arrived, our labourer, not brave, + </p> + <p> + Concealed himself, but not in vault nor cave; + </p> + <p> + He plunged within a vase extremely large, + </p> + <p> + Where holy-water always was in charge; + </p> + <p> + No demon would have thought to find him there, + </p> + <p> + So well the clod had chosen his repair; + </p> + <p> + In sacred stoles he muffled up his skin, + </p> + <p> + And, 'bove the water, only kept his chin; + </p> + <p> + There we will leave him, while the priests profound + </p> + <p> + Repeated Vade retro round and round. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + PERRETTA at the house remained to greet + </p> + <p> + The lordly devil whom she hoped to cheat. + </p> + <p> + He soon appeared; when with dishevelled hair, + </p> + <p> + And flowing tears, as if o'erwhelmed with care, + </p> + <p> + She sallied forth, and bitterly complained, + </p> + <p> + How oft by Phil she had been scratched and caned; + </p> + <p> + Said she, the wretch has used me very ill; + </p> + <p> + Of cruelty he has obtained his fill; + </p> + <p> + For God's sake try, my lord, to get away: + </p> + <p> + Just now I heard the savage fellow say, + </p> + <p> + He'd with his claws your lordship tear and slash: + </p> + <p> + See, only see, my lord, he made this gash; + </p> + <p> + On which she showed:—what you will guess, no doubt, + </p> + <p> + And put the demon presently to rout, + </p> + <p> + Who crossed himself and trembled with affright: + </p> + <p> + He'd never seen nor heard of such a sight, + </p> + <p> + Where scratch from claws or nails had so appeared; + </p> + <p> + His fears prevailed, and off he quickly steered; + </p> + <p> + Perretta left, who, by her friends around, + </p> + <p> + Was complimented on her sense profound, + </p> + <p> + That could so well the demon's snares defeat; + </p> + <p> + The clergy too pronounced her plan discrete. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Feronde" id="Feronde"></a>FERONDE + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20227m.jpg" alt="20227m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20227.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">I</span>N Eastern climes, by means considered new; + </p> + <p> + The Mount's old-man, with terrors would pursue; + </p> + <p> + His large domains howe'er were not the cause, + </p> + <p> + Nor heaps of gold, that gave him such applause, + </p> + <p> + But manners strange his subjects to persuade; + </p> + <p> + In ev'ry wish, to serve him they were made. + </p> + <p> + Among his people boldest hearts he chose, + </p> + <p> + And to their view would Paradise disclose + </p> + <p> + Its blissful pleasures:—ev'ry soft delight, + </p> + <p> + Designed to gratify the sense and sight. + </p> + <p> + So plausible this prophet's tale appeared, + </p> + <p> + Each word he dropt was thoroughly revered. + </p> + <p> + Whence this delusion?—DRINK deranged the mind; + </p> + <p> + And, reason drowned, to madness they resigned. + </p> + <p> + Thus void of knowing clearly what they did, + </p> + <p> + They soon were brought to act as they were bid; + </p> + <p> + Conveyed to places, charming to the eye, + </p> + <p> + Enchanting gardens 'neath an azure sky, + </p> + <p> + With twining shrubs, meandring walks, and flow'rs, + </p> + <p> + And num'rous grottos, porticoes and bow'rs. + </p> + <p> + When they chanced to pass where all was gay, + </p> + <p> + From wine's inebriating pow'rful sway, + </p> + <p> + They wondered at the frolicking around, + </p> + <p> + And fancied they were got on fairy ground, + </p> + <p> + Which Mahomet pretended was assigned, + </p> + <p> + For those to his doctrine were inclined. + </p> + <p> + To tempt the men and girls to seek the scene, + </p> + <p> + And skip and play and dance upon the green, + </p> + <p> + To murm'ring streams, meandering along, + </p> + <p> + And lutes' soft notes and nightingales' sweet song: + </p> + <p> + No earthly pleasure but might there be viewed, + </p> + <p> + The best of wines and choicest fruits accrued, + </p> + <p> + To render sense bewildered at the sight, + </p> + <p> + And sink inebriated with delight. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THEN back they bore them motionless to sleep, + </p> + <p> + And wake with wishes further joys to reap. + </p> + <p> + From these enjoyments many fully thought, + </p> + <p> + To such enchanting scenes they should be brought, + </p> + <p> + In future times, eternal bliss to taste, + </p> + <p> + If death and danger valiantly they faced, + </p> + <p> + And tried the prophet Mahomet to please, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry point to serve their prince would seize. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE Mount's old man, by means like these, could say; + </p> + <p> + He'd men devoted to support his sway; + </p> + <p> + Upon the globe no empire more was feared, + </p> + <p> + Or king or potentate like him revered. + </p> + <p> + These circumstances I've minutely told, + </p> + <p> + To show, our tale was known in days of old. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + FERONDE, a rich, but awkward, vulgar clown, + </p> + <p> + A ninny was believed throughout the town; + </p> + <p> + He had the charge of revenues not slight, + </p> + <p> + Which he collected for a friar white. + </p> + <p> + Of these I've known as good as any black, + </p> + <p> + When husbands some assistance seemed to lack, + </p> + <p> + And had so much to do, they monks might need; + </p> + <p> + Or other friends, their work at home to speed. + </p> + <p> + This friar for to-morrow never thought, + </p> + <p> + But squandered ev'ry thing as soon as brought; + </p> + <p> + No saint-apostle less of wealth retained; + </p> + <p> + Good cheer o'er ev'ry wish triumphant reigned, + </p> + <p> + Save now and then to have a little fun, + </p> + <p> + (Unknown to others) with a pretty nun. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + FERONDE had got a spouse of pleasing sight, + </p> + <p> + Related nearly to our friar white, + </p> + <p> + Whose predecessor, uncle, sponsor kind, + </p> + <p> + Now gone to realms of night, had her consigned, + </p> + <p> + To be this silly blockhead's lawful wife, + </p> + <p> + Who thought her hand the honour of his life. + </p> + <p> + 'Tis said that bastard-daughters oft retain + </p> + <p> + A disposition to the parent-train; + </p> + <p> + And this, the saying, truly ne'er bellied, + </p> + <p> + Nor was her spouse so weak but he descried, + </p> + <p> + Things clearer than was requisite believed, + </p> + <p> + And doubted much if he were not deceived. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE wife would often to the prelate go, + </p> + <p> + Pretending business, proper he should know; + </p> + <p> + A thousand circumstances she could find; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas then accounts: now sev'ral things combined; + </p> + <p> + In short no day nor hour within the week, + </p> + <p> + But something at the friar's she would seek. + </p> + <p> + The holy father then was always prone, + </p> + <p> + To send the servants off and be alone. + </p> + <p> + Howe'er the husband, doubting tricks were played; + </p> + <p> + Got troublesome; his wife would much upbraid + </p> + <p> + When she returned, and often beat her too; + </p> + <p> + In short,—he unaccommodating grew. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE rural mind by nature jealous proves; + </p> + <p> + Suspicion shows of ev'ry thing that moves; + </p> + <p> + Unused to city ways, perverse appears, + </p> + <p> + And, undismayed, to principle adheres: <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE friar found his situation hard; + </p> + <p> + He loved his ease?—all trouble would discard; + </p> + <p> + As priests in gen'ral anxiously desire; + </p> + <p> + Their plan howe'er I never can admire, + </p> + <p> + And should not choose at once to take the town, + </p> + <p> + But by the escalade obtain the crown; + </p> + <p> + In LOVE I mean; to WAR I don't allude: + </p> + <p> + No silly bragging I would here intrude, + </p> + <p> + Nor be enrolled among the martial train: + </p> + <p> + 'Tis Venus' court that I should like to gain. + </p> + <p> + Let t'other custom be the better way: + </p> + <p> + It matters not; no longer I'll delay, + </p> + <p> + But to my tale return, and fully state, + </p> + <p> + How our receiver, who misused his mate; + </p> + <p> + Was put in purgatory to be cured, + </p> + <p> + And, for a time, most thoroughly immured. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BY means of opiate powders, much renowned, + </p> + <p> + The friar plunged him in a sleep profound. + </p> + <p> + Thought dead; the fun'ral obsequies achieved, + </p> + <p> + He was surprised, and doubtless sorely grieved, + </p> + <p> + When he awoke and saw where he was placed, + </p> + <p> + With folks around, not much to suit his taste; + </p> + <p> + For in the coffin he at large was left, + </p> + <p> + And of the pow'r to move was not bereft, + </p> + <p> + But might arise and walk about the tomb, + </p> + <p> + Which opened to another vaulted room, + </p> + <p> + The gloomy, hollow mansion of the dead: + </p> + <p> + Fear quickly o'er his drooping spirits spread. + </p> + <p> + What's here? cried he: is't sleep, or is it death; + </p> + <p> + Some charm or spell perhaps withdraws their breath. + </p> + <p> + Our wight then asked their names and business there; + </p> + <p> + And why he was retained in such a snare? + </p> + <p> + In what had he offended God or man?— <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + Said one, console thyself:—past moments scan; + </p> + <p> + When thou hast rested here a thousand years, + </p> + <p> + Thou'lt then ascend amid the Heav'nly spheres; + </p> + <p> + But first in holy purgatory learn, + </p> + <p> + To cleanse thyself from sins that we discern; + </p> + <p> + One day thy soul shall leave this loathsome place, + </p> + <p> + And, pure as ice, repair to realms of grace. + </p> + <p> + Then this consoling Angel gave a thwack, + </p> + <p> + And ten or dozen stripes laid on his back:— + </p> + <p> + 'Tis thy unruly, jealous mind, said he, + </p> + <p> + Displeases God, and dooms thee here to be. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A MOURNFUL sigh the lorn receiver heaved, + </p> + <p> + His aching shoulders rubbed, and sobbed and grieved; + </p> + <p> + A thousand years, cried he, 'tis long indeed! + </p> + <p> + My very soul with horror seems to bleed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WE should observe, this Angel was a wag, + </p> + <p> + A novice-friar and a convent fag; + </p> + <p> + Like him the others round had parts to act, + </p> + <p> + And were disguised in dresses quite exact. + </p> + <p> + Our penitent most humbly pardon sought; + </p> + <p> + Said he, if e'er to life again I'm brought, + </p> + <p> + No jealousy, suspicion's hateful bane, + </p> + <p> + Shall ever enter my distracted brain. + </p> + <p> + May I not have this grace, this wished for boon? + </p> + <p> + Some hopes they gave, but it could not be soon; + </p> + <p> + In short a year he lay upon the floor: + </p> + <p> + Just food for life received, and nothing more, + </p> + <p> + Each day on bread and water he was fed, + </p> + <p> + And o'er his back the cat-o'nine-tails spread: + </p> + <p> + Full twenty lashes were the number set, + </p> + <p> + Unless the friar should from Heav'n first get + </p> + <p> + Permission to remit at times a part, + </p> + <p> + For charity was glowing in his heart. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WE, must not doubt, he often offered prayers, + </p> + <p> + To ease the culprit's sufferings and cares. + </p> + <p> + The Angel likewise made a long discourse; + </p> + <p> + Said he, those vile suspicions were the source, + </p> + <p> + Of all thy sorrow, wretchedness, and pain: + </p> + <p> + Think'st thou such thoughts the clergy entertain? + </p> + <p> + A friar white!—too bad in ev'ry sense: + </p> + <p> + Ten strokes to one, if black, for such offence. + </p> + <p> + Repent, I say:—the other this desired, + </p> + <p> + Though scarcely he could tell what was required. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + MEANWHILE the prelate with the fav'rite dame, + </p> + <p> + No time to lose, made ev'ry hour the same. + </p> + <p> + The husband, with a sigh, was heard to say: + </p> + <p> + I wonder what my wife's about to-day? + </p> + <p> + About?—whate'er it be 'tis doubtless right; + </p> + <p> + Our friar, to console her, takes delight; + </p> + <p> + Thy business too is managed as before, + </p> + <p> + And anxious care bestowed upon thy store. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HAS she as usual matters that demand + </p> + <p> + Attendance at the cloister to be scanned?— + </p> + <p> + No doubt was the reply, for having now + </p> + <p> + The whole affair upon her feeble brow, + </p> + <p> + Poor woman! be her wishes what they will, + </p> + <p> + She more assistance wants thy loss to fill. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + DISCOURSE like this no pleasure gave the soul: + </p> + <p> + To call him so seems best upon the whole, + </p> + <p> + Since he'd not pow'r like others here to feed:— + </p> + <p> + Mere earthly shadow for a time decreed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A MONTH was passed in fasting, pains, and prayer; + </p> + <p> + Some charity the friar made him share, + </p> + <p> + And now and then remission would direct; + </p> + <p> + The widow too he never would neglect, + </p> + <p> + But, all the consolation in his pow'r, + </p> + <p> + Bestowed upon her ev'ry leisure hour, + </p> + <p> + His tender cares unfruitful were not long; + </p> + <p> + Beyond his hopes the soil proved good and strong; + </p> + <p> + In short our Pater Abbas justly feared, + </p> + <p> + To make him father many signs appeared. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SINCE 'twere improper such a fact were known; + </p> + <p> + When proofs perhaps too clearly might be shown, + </p> + <p> + So many prayers were said and vigils kept, + </p> + <p> + At length the soul from purgatory crept, + </p> + <p> + So much reduced, and ev'ry way so thin + </p> + <p> + But little more he seemed than bones and skin. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A THING so strange filled numbers with surprise, + </p> + <p> + Who scarcely would believe their ears and eyes. + </p> + <p> + The friar passed for saint:—Feronde his fruit; + </p> + <p> + None durst presume to doubt nor to dispute; + </p> + <p> + A double miracle at once appeared + </p> + <p> + The dead's return: the lady's state revered. + </p> + <p> + With treble force Te Deum round was sung; + </p> + <p> + Sterility in marriage oft was rung, + </p> + <p> + And near the convent many offered prayers, + </p> + <p> + In hopes their fervent vows would gain them heirs. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE humble spouse and wife we now shall leave + </p> + <p> + Let none, howe'er, suppose that we conceive, + </p> + <p> + Each husband merits, as our soul, the same, + </p> + <p> + To cure the jealous fears his breast inflame. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Psalter" id="Psalter"></a>THE PSALTER + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20237m.jpg" alt="20237m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20237.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">O</span>NCE more permit me, nuns, and this the last; + </p> + <p> + I can't resist, whatever may have passed, + </p> + <p> + But must relate, what often I've been told; + </p> + <p> + Your tales of convent pranks are seldom cold; + </p> + <p> + They have a grace that no where else we find, + </p> + <p> + And, somehow, better seem to please designed. + </p> + <p> + Another then we'll have, which three will make:— + </p> + <p> + Three did I say?-'tis four, or I mistake; + </p> + <p> + Let's count them well:-The GARD'NER first, we'll name; + </p> + <p> + Then comes the ABBESS, whose declining frame + </p> + <p> + Required a youth, her malady to cure + </p> + <p> + A story thought, perhaps, not over pure; + </p> + <p> + And, as to SISTER JANE, who'd got a brat, + </p> + <p> + I cannot fancy we should alter that. + </p> + <p> + These are the whole, and four's a number round; + </p> + <p> + You'll probably remark, 'tis strange I've found + </p> + <p> + Such pleasure in detailing convent scenes:— + </p> + <p> + 'Tis not my whim, but TASTE, that thither leans: + </p> + <p> + And, if you'd kept your breviary in view, + </p> + <p> + 'Tis clear, you'd nothing had with this to do; + </p> + <p> + We know, howe'er, 'tis not your fondest care; + </p> + <p> + So, quickly to our hist'ry let's repair. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A CHARMING youth would frequent visits pay, + </p> + <p> + To nuns, whose convent near his dwelling lay; + </p> + <p> + And, 'mong the sisters, one his person saw, + </p> + <p> + Who, by her eyes, would fain attention draw; + </p> + <p> + Smiles she bestowed, and other complaisance, + </p> + <p> + But not a single step would he advance; + </p> + <p> + By old and young he greatly was admired; + </p> + <p> + Sighs burst around, but none his bosom fired. + </p> + <p> + Fair Isabella solely got his love, + </p> + <p> + A beauteous nun, and gentle as a dove, + </p> + <p> + Till then a novice in the flow'ry chain, + </p> + <p> + And envied doubly:—for her charms and swain. + </p> + <p> + Their soft amours were watched with eagle-eye: + </p> + <p> + No pleasure's free from care you may rely; + </p> + <p> + In life each comfort coupled is with ill, + </p> + <p> + And this to alter baffles all our skill. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE sister nuns so vigilant had been, + </p> + <p> + One night when darkness overspread the scene; + </p> + <p> + And all was proper mysteries to hide, + </p> + <p> + Some words escaped her cell that doubts supplied, + </p> + <p> + And other matters too were heard around, + </p> + <p> + That in her breviary could not be found. + </p> + <p> + 'Tis her gallant! said they: he's clearly caught; + </p> + <p> + Alarm pervaded; swarms were quickly brought; + </p> + <p> + Rage seemed to triumph; sentinels were placed; + </p> + <p> + The abbess too must know they were disgraced. + </p> + <p> + Away they hastened to convey surprise, + </p> + <p> + And, thund'ring at her door, cried, madam rise, + </p> + <p> + For sister Isabella, in her cell, + </p> + <p> + Has got a man, which surely can't be well. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + YOU will observe, the dame was not at prayer, + </p> + <p> + Nor yet absorbed in sleep, devoid of care, + </p> + <p> + But with her then, this abbess had in bed + </p> + <p> + Good parson John, by kindness thither led, + </p> + <p> + A neighb'ring rector, confessor, and friend; + </p> + <p> + She rose in haste the sisters to attend, + </p> + <p> + And, seeking for her veil, with sense confused, + </p> + <p> + The parson's breeches took for what she used, + </p> + <p> + Which, in the dark, resembled what was worn + </p> + <p> + By nuns for veils, and called (perhaps in scorn), + </p> + <p> + Among themselves, their PSALTER, to express + </p> + <p> + Familiarly, a common, awkward dress. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WITH this new ornament, by way of veil, + </p> + <p> + She sallied forth and heard the woeful tale. + </p> + <p> + Then, irritated, she exclaimed with ire + </p> + <p> + To see this wretched creature I desire, + </p> + <p> + The devil's daughter, from her bold career, + </p> + <p> + Who'll bring our convent to disgrace, I fear; + </p> + <p> + But God forbid, I say, and with his leave, + </p> + <p> + We'll all restore:—rebuke she shall receive. + </p> + <p> + A chapter we will call:—the sisters came, + </p> + <p> + And stood around to hear their pious dame. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + FAIR Isabella now the abbess sent, + </p> + <p> + Who straight obeyed, and to her tears gave vent, + </p> + <p> + Which overspread those lily cheeks and eyes, + </p> + <p> + A roguish youth so lately held his prize. + </p> + <p> + What! said the abbess: pretty scandal here, + </p> + <p> + When in the house of God such things appear; + </p> + <p> + Ashamed to death you ought to be, no doubt, + </p> + <p> + Who brought you thither?—such we always scout. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NOW Isabella, (—sister you must lose, + </p> + <p> + Henceforth, that name to you we cannot use; + </p> + <p> + The honour is too great,) in such a case, + </p> + <p> + Pray are you sensible of your disgrace, + </p> + <p> + And what's the punishment you'll undergo? + </p> + <p> + Before to-morrow, this you'll fully know; + </p> + <p> + Our institution chastisement decrees; + </p> + <p> + Come speak, I say, we'll hear you if you please. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + POOR Isabella, with her sight on ground, + </p> + <p> + Confused, till then had scarcely looked around, + </p> + <p> + Now raised her eyes, and luckily perceived + </p> + <p> + The breeches, which her fears in part relieved, + </p> + <p> + And that the sisters, by surprise unnerved, + </p> + <p> + As oft's the case, had never once observed. + </p> + <p> + She courage took, and to the abbess said, + </p> + <p> + There's something from the Psalter, on your head, + </p> + <p> + That awkwardly hangs down; pray, madam, try + </p> + <p> + To put it right, or 'twill be in your eye. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + 'TWAS knee-strings, worn, at times, by priests and beaux, + </p> + <p> + For, more or less, all follow fashion's laws. + </p> + <p> + This veil, no doubt, had very much the air + </p> + <p> + Of those unmentionables parsons wear; + </p> + <p> + And this the nun, to frolicking inclined, + </p> + <p> + It seems had well impressed upon her mind. + </p> + <p> + What, cried the abbess, dares she still to sneer? + </p> + <p> + How great her insolence to laugh and jeer, + </p> + <p> + When sins so heavily upon her rest, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry thing remains quite unconfessed. + </p> + <p> + Upon my word, she'd be a saint decreed; + </p> + <p> + My veil, young imp, your notice cannot need; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis better think, you little hellish crow, + </p> + <p> + What pains your soul must undergo below. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE mother abbess sermonized and fired, + </p> + <p> + And seemed as if her tongue would ne'er be tired. + </p> + <p> + Again the culprit said, your Psalter, pray, + </p> + <p> + Good madam, haste to set the proper way; + </p> + <p> + On which the sisters looked, both young and old + </p> + <p> + THOSE 'gan to laugh, while THESE were heard to scold. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR preacher, quite ashamed of what she'd done, + </p> + <p> + Now lost her voice, and noticed not the nun; + </p> + <p> + The murmur buzzed around, too well expressed, + </p> + <p> + What thoughts the holy sisterhood possessed. + </p> + <p> + At length the abbess said:—we've now not time + </p> + <p> + To take the chapter's votes upon her crime; + </p> + <p> + 'Twould make it late; let each to bed return, + </p> + <p> + And, till to-morrow, we'll the case adjourn. + </p> + <p> + No chapter met, howe'er, when morrow came; + </p> + <p> + Another day arrived, and still the same; + </p> + <p> + The sages of the convent thought it best, + </p> + <p> + In fact, to let the mystick business rest. + </p> + <p> + Much noise, perhaps, would hurt religion's cause, + </p> + <p> + And, that considered, prudent 'twere to pause. + </p> + <p> + Base envy made them Isabella hate, + </p> + <p> + And dark suspicions to the abbess state. + </p> + <p> + In short, unable by their schemes to get + </p> + <p> + The morsel she'd so fortunately met, + </p> + <p> + Each nun exerted all her art to find, + </p> + <p> + What equally might satisfy the mind. + </p> + <p> + Old friends were willingly received again; + </p> + <p> + Her gallant our belle was suffered to retain; + </p> + <p> + The rector and the abbess had their will; + </p> + <p> + And, such their union, precepts to fulfill, + </p> + <p> + That if a nun had none to give her bliss, + </p> + <p> + To lend a friend was nothing thought amiss. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="King_Candaules" id="King_Candaules"></a>KING CANDAULES AND THE + DOCTOR OF LAWS + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20245m.jpg" alt="20245m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20245.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">I</span>N life oft ills from self-imprudence spring; + </p> + <p> + As proof, Candaules' story we will bring; + </p> + <p> + In folly's scenes the king was truly great: + </p> + <p> + His vassal, Gyges, had from him a bait, + </p> + <p> + The like in gallantry was rarely known, + </p> + <p> + And want of prudence never more was shown. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + MY friend, said he, you frequently have seen + </p> + <p> + The beauteous face and features of the queen; + </p> + <p> + But these are naught, believe me, to the rest, + </p> + <p> + Which solely can be viewed when quite undressed. + </p> + <p> + Some day I'll let you gratify your eyes; + </p> + <p> + Without her knowledge I'll means devise; + </p> + <p> + But on condition:—you'll remember well + </p> + <p> + What you behold, to no one you will tell, + </p> + <p> + In ev'ry step most cautiously proceed, + </p> + <p> + And not your mind with silly wishes feed; + </p> + <p> + No sort of pleasure surely I could take, + </p> + <p> + To see vain passion you her lover make. + </p> + <p> + You must propose, this charming form to view, + </p> + <p> + As if mere marble, though to nature true; + </p> + <p> + And I'm convinced you'll readily declare, + </p> + <p> + Beyond nor art can reach, nor thought prepare; + </p> + <p> + Just now I left her in the bath at ease: + </p> + <p> + A judge you are, and shall the moment seize; + </p> + <p> + Come, witness my felicity supreme; + </p> + <p> + You know her beauties are my constant theme. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AWAY they went, and Gyges much admired; + </p> + <p> + Still more than that: in truth his breast was fired; + </p> + <p> + For when she moved astonishment was great, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry grace upon her seemed to wait. + </p> + <p> + Emotion to suppress howe'er he tried, + </p> + <p> + Since he had promised what he felt to hide; + </p> + <p> + To hold his tongue he wished, but that might raise + </p> + <p> + Suspicions of designs and mystick ways. + </p> + <p> + Exaggeration was the better part, + </p> + <p> + And from the subject he would never start, + </p> + <p> + But fully praised each beauty in detail, + </p> + <p> + Without appearing any thing to veil. + </p> + <p> + Gods! Gyges cried, how truly, king, you're blessed; + </p> + <p> + The skin how fair—how charming all the rest! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS am'rous conversation by the queen + </p> + <p> + Was never heard, or she'd enraged have been; + </p> + <p> + In ancient days of ignorance, we find, + </p> + <p> + The sex, to show resentment, much inclined; + </p> + <p> + In diff'rent light at present this appears, + </p> + <p> + And fulsome praises ne'er offend their ears. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR arch observer struggled with his sighs + </p> + <p> + Those feelings much increased, so fair the prize: + </p> + <p> + The prince, in doubt, conducted him away; + </p> + <p> + But in his heart a hundred arrows lay; + </p> + <p> + Each magick charm directed pointed darts; + </p> + <p> + To flee were useless: LOVE such pain imparts, + </p> + <p> + That nothing can at times obstruct its course; + </p> + <p> + So quick the flight: so truly great the force. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHILE near the king, much caution Gyges showed; + </p> + <p> + But soon the belle perceived his bosom glowed; + </p> + <p> + She learned the cause:—her spouse the tale disclosed, + </p> + <p> + And laughed and jeered, as he the facts exposed: + </p> + <p> + A silly blockhead! not to know a queen + </p> + <p> + Could raillery not bear on such a scene. + </p> + <p> + But had it pleased her wishes, still 'twere right + </p> + <p> + (Such honour's dictates) to discover spite; + </p> + <p> + And this she truly did, while in her mind, + </p> + <p> + To be revenged she fully was inclined. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + FOR once, good reader, I should wish thee wife; + </p> + <p> + Or otherwise, thou never can'st in life, + </p> + <p> + Conceive the lengths a woman oft will go, + </p> + <p> + Whose breast is filled with wrath and secret woe. + </p> + <p> + A mortal was allowed these charms to view, + </p> + <p> + Which others' eyes could never dare pursue. + </p> + <p> + Such treasures were for gods, or rather kings + </p> + <p> + The privilege of both are beauteous things. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THESE thoughts induced the queen revenge to seek; + </p> + <p> + Rage moved her breast, and shame possessed her cheek. + </p> + <p> + E'en Cupid, we are told, assistance gave; + </p> + <p> + What from his aim effectually can save? + </p> + <p> + Fair in person was Gyges to behold; + </p> + <p> + Excuses for her easy 'twere to mould; + </p> + <p> + To show her charms, what baseness could excel? + </p> + <p> + And on th' exposer all her hatred fell. + </p> + <p> + Besides, he was a husband, which is worse + </p> + <p> + With these each sin receives a double curse. + </p> + <p> + What more shall I detail?—the facts are plain: + </p> + <p> + Detested was the king:—beloved the swain; + </p> + <p> + All was accomplished, and the monarch placed + </p> + <p> + Among the heroes who with horns are graced; + </p> + <p> + No doubt a dignity not much desired, + </p> + <p> + Though in repute, and easily acquired. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SUCH merit had the prince's folly got, + </p> + <p> + 'In petto', Vulcan's brother was his lot; + </p> + <p> + The distance thence is little to the HAT: + </p> + <p> + The honour much the same of this or that. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SO far 'twas passing well, but, in the intrigue; + </p> + <p> + The cruel Parcae now appeared to league; + </p> + <p> + And soon the lovers, on possession bent, + </p> + <p> + To black Cocytus' shores the monarch sent; + </p> + <p> + Too much of certain potions forced to drink, + </p> + <p> + He quickly viewed the dreary, horrid brink; + </p> + <p> + While pleasing the objects Gyges' eyes beheld; + </p> + <p> + And in the palace presently he dwelled, + </p> + <p> + For, whether love or rage the widow fired, + </p> + <p> + Her throne and hand she gave, as was required. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + T' EXTEND this tale was never my design; + </p> + <p> + Though known full well, I do not now repine; + </p> + <p> + The case so thoroughly my purpose served. + </p> + <p> + Ne'er from the narrative the object swerved; + </p> + <p> + And scarcely can I fancy, better light + </p> + <p> + The DOCTOR will afford to what I write. + </p> + <p> + The scenes that follow I from Rome have drawn; + </p> + <p> + Not Rome of old, ere manners had their dawn, + </p> + <p> + When customs were unpleasant and severe + </p> + <p> + The females, silly, and gallants in fear; + </p> + <p> + But Rome of modern days, delightful spot! + </p> + <p> + Where better tastes have into fashion got, + </p> + <p> + And pleasure solely occupies the mind + </p> + <p> + To rapture ev'ry bosom seems resigned. + </p> + <p> + A tempting journey truly it appears, + </p> + <p> + For youths from twenty on to thirty years. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NOT long ago, then, in the city dwelled, + </p> + <p> + A master, who in teaching law excelled; + </p> + <p> + In other matters he, howe'er, was thought + </p> + <p> + A man that jollity and laughter sought. + </p> + <p> + He criticised whatever passed around, + </p> + <p> + And oft, at others' cost, diversion found. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IT happened that our learned doctor had, + </p> + <p> + Among his many pupils (good and bad) + </p> + <p> + A Frenchman, less designed to study laws, + </p> + <p> + Than, in amours, perhaps, to gain applause. + </p> + <p> + One day, observing him with clouded mien, + </p> + <p> + My friend, said he, you surely have the spleen, + </p> + <p> + And, out of college, nothing seem to do; + </p> + <p> + No law books read:—some object I'd pursue; + </p> + <p> + A handsome Frenchman should his hours improve; + </p> + <p> + Seek soft intrigues, or as a lover move; + </p> + <p> + Talents you have, and gay coquettes are here + </p> + <p> + Not one, thank heav'n, but numbers oft appear. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE student answered, I am new at Rome, + </p> + <p> + And, save the belles who sell their beauteous bloom, + </p> + <p> + I can't perceive, gallants much business find, + </p> + <p> + Each house, like monasteries, is designed, + </p> + <p> + With double doors, and bolts, and matrons sour, + </p> + <p> + And husbands Argus-eyed, who'd you devour. + </p> + <p> + Where can I go to follow up your plan, + </p> + <p> + And hope, in spots like these, a flame to fan? + </p> + <p> + 'Twere not less difficult to reach the moon, + </p> + <p> + And with my teeth I'd bite it just as soon. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HA! HA! replied the doctor with delight, + </p> + <p> + The honour which you do us is not slight; + </p> + <p> + I pity men quite fresh and raw like you; + </p> + <p> + Our town, I see, you've hardly travelled through, + </p> + <p> + You fancy then, such wily snares are set, + </p> + <p> + 'Tis difficult intrigues in Rome to get. + </p> + <p> + I'd have you know, we've creatures who devise, + </p> + <p> + To horn their husbands under Argus' eyes. + </p> + <p> + 'Tis very common; only try around, + </p> + <p> + And soon you'll find, that sly amours abound. + </p> + <p> + Within the neighb'ring church go take your place, + </p> + <p> + And, to the dames who pass in search of grace, + </p> + <p> + Present your fingers dipt in water blessed:— + </p> + <p> + A sign for those who wish to be caressed. + </p> + <p> + In case the suppliant's air some lady please, + </p> + <p> + Who knows her trade, and how to act at ease, + </p> + <p> + She'll send a message, something to desire: + </p> + <p> + You'll soon be found, wherever you retire, + </p> + <p> + Though lodged so secretly, that God alone, + </p> + <p> + Till then, your place of residence had known. + </p> + <p> + An aged female will on you attend, + </p> + <p> + Who, used to this, will full assistance lend, + </p> + <p> + Arrange an interview with wily art; + </p> + <p> + No trouble take, you'll have an easy part; + </p> + <p> + No trouble did I say? why, that's too much; + </p> + <p> + Some things I would except, their pow'r is such; + </p> + <p> + And proper 'tis, my friend, that I should hint, + </p> + <p> + Attentions you at Rome should well imprint, + </p> + <p> + And be discrete; in France you favours boast: + </p> + <p> + Of ev'ry moment here you make the most; + </p> + <p> + The Romans to the greatest lengths proceed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + So best, the spark replied, I like the deed; + </p> + <p> + And, though no Gascon, I may boldly say; + </p> + <p> + Superior prowess always I display. + </p> + <p> + Perhaps 'twas otherwise, for ev'ry wight; + </p> + <p> + In this, to play the Gascon, thinks it right. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + To all the doctor's words our youth adhered, + </p> + <p> + And presently within a church appeared, + </p> + <p> + Where daily came the choicest belles around, + </p> + <p> + And loves and graces in their train were found, + </p> + <p> + Or, if 'tis wished in modern phrase to speak, + </p> + <p> + Attention num'rous angels there would seek. + </p> + <p> + Beneath their veils were beauteous sparkling eyes; + </p> + <p> + The holy-water scarcely would suffice. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IN lucky spot the spark his station took, + </p> + <p> + And gave to each that passed a plaintive look; + </p> + <p> + To some he bowed; to others seemed to pray, + </p> + <p> + And holy water offered on their way. + </p> + <p> + One angel 'mong the rest the boon received, + </p> + <p> + With easy pleasing air, that much relieved; + </p> + <p> + On which the student to himself expressed, + </p> + <p> + A fond belief, with her he might be blessed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN home, an aged female to him came, + </p> + <p> + And soon a meeting place he heard her name. + </p> + <p> + To count particulars howe'er were vain + </p> + <p> + Their pranks were many, and their folly plain; + </p> + <p> + The belle was handsome; ev'ry bliss was sought, + </p> + <p> + And all their moments most delightful thought. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HE, to the doctor, ev'ry matter told + </p> + <p> + Discretion in a Frenchman would be cold; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis out of nature, and bespeaks the cit; + </p> + <p> + Smells strong of shop, and would not fashion fit. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE learned teacher satisfaction showed, + </p> + <p> + That such success from his instructions flowed, + </p> + <p> + Laughed heartily at husbands, silly wights, + </p> + <p> + Who had not wit to guard connubial rights, + </p> + <p> + And from their lamb the wily wolf to keep: + </p> + <p> + A shepherd will o'erlook a hundred sheep, + </p> + <p> + While foolish man's unable to protect, + </p> + <p> + E'en one where most he'd wish to be correct. + </p> + <p> + Howe'er, this care he thought was somewhat hard, + </p> + <p> + But not a thing impossible to guard; + </p> + <p> + And if he had not got a hundred eyes, + </p> + <p> + Thank heav'n, his wife, though cunning to devise, + </p> + <p> + He could defy:—her thoughts so well he knew, + </p> + <p> + That these intrigues she never would pursue. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + YOU'LL, ne'er believe, good reader, without shame, + </p> + <p> + The doctor's wife was she our annals name; + </p> + <p> + And what's still worse, so many things he asked, + </p> + <p> + Her look, air, form, and secret charms unmasked, + </p> + <p> + That ev'ry answer fully seemed to say, + </p> + <p> + 'Twas clearly she, who thus had gone astray. + </p> + <p> + One circumstance the lawyer led to doubt: + </p> + <p> + Some talents had the student pointed out, + </p> + <p> + Which she had never to her husband shown, + </p> + <p> + And this relief administered alone. + </p> + <p> + Thought he, those manners not to her belong, + </p> + <p> + But all the rest are indications strong, + </p> + <p> + And prove the case; yet she at home is dull; + </p> + <p> + While this appears to be a prattling trull, + </p> + <p> + And pleasing in her conversation too; + </p> + <p> + In other matters 'tis my wife we view, + </p> + <p> + Form, face, complexion, features, eyes, and hair, + </p> + <p> + The whole combined pronounces her the fair. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT length, when to himself the sage had said + </p> + <p> + 'Tis she; and then, 'tis not;—his senses led + </p> + <p> + To make him in the first opinion rest, + </p> + <p> + You well may guess what rage was in his breast. + </p> + <p> + A second meeting you have fixed? cried he; + </p> + <p> + Yes, said the Frenchman, that was made with glee; + </p> + <p> + We found the first so pleasing to our mind, + </p> + <p> + That to another both were well inclined, + </p> + <p> + And thoroughly resolved more fun to seek. + </p> + <p> + That's right, replied the doctor, have your freak; + </p> + <p> + The lady howsoe'er I now could name. + </p> + <p> + The scholar answered, that to me's the same; + </p> + <p> + I care not what she's called, Nor who she be: + </p> + <p> + 'Tis quite enough that we so well agree. + </p> + <p> + By this time I'm convinced her loving spouse. + </p> + <p> + Possesses what an anchorite might rouse; + </p> + <p> + And if a failure any where be met, + </p> + <p> + At such a place to-morrow one may get, + </p> + <p> + What I shall hope, exactly at the hour, + </p> + <p> + To find resigned and fully in my pow'r: <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IN bed I shall be instantly received, + </p> + <p> + And from anxiety be soon relieved. + </p> + <p> + The place of meeting is a room below, + </p> + <p> + Most nicely furnished, rich, but void of show. + </p> + <p> + At first I through a passage dark was led, + </p> + <p> + Where Sol's bright rays are ne'er allowed to spread; + </p> + <p> + But soon, by my conductress, I was brought, + </p> + <p> + 'Mid LOVE'S delights, where all with charms was frought. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20257m.jpg" alt="20257m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20257.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + ON this you may suppose the doctor's pain; + </p> + <p> + But presently he thought a point to gain, + </p> + <p> + And take the student's place by wily art, + </p> + <p> + Where, acting in disguise the lover's part, + </p> + <p> + His rib he might entangle in a net, + </p> + <p> + And vassalage bestow she'd ne'er forget. + </p> + <p> + Our learned man was clearly in the wrong; + </p> + <p> + 'Twere better far to sleep and hold his tongue; + </p> + <p> + Unless, with God's assistance, he could raise + </p> + <p> + A remedy that merited full praise. + </p> + <p> + Whenever wives have got a candidate, + </p> + <p> + To be admitted to the Cuckold's state, + </p> + <p> + If thence he get scot free 'tis luck indeed; + </p> + <p> + But once received, and ornaments decreed, + </p> + <p> + A blot the more will surely nothing add, + </p> + <p> + To one already in the garment clad. + </p> + <p> + The doctor otherwise however thought; + </p> + <p> + Yet still his reason no advantage brought; + </p> + <p> + Indeed he fancied, if he could forestall + </p> + <p> + The youth who now he might his master call; + </p> + <p> + The trick would to his wisdom credit do, + </p> + <p> + And show, superior wiles he could pursue. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AWAY the husband hastened to the place; + </p> + <p> + In full belief, that, hiding well his face, + </p> + <p> + And favoured by the darkness of the spot, + </p> + <p> + The silence marked, and myst'ry of the plot, + </p> + <p> + He, undiscovered, safely might be led, + </p> + <p> + Where such delicious fruits were ready spread. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + MISFORTUNE, howsoe'er, would so direct + </p> + <p> + The aged female nothing to neglect, + </p> + <p> + Had with her got a lantern to conduct, + </p> + <p> + The light from which at will she could obstruct, + </p> + <p> + And, far more cunning than our learned sage, + </p> + <p> + Perceived at once with whom she had t'engage; + </p> + <p> + But, marking no surprise, she bade him wait, + </p> + <p> + While she, his coming, to her dame should state. + </p> + <p> + Said she, unless I tell her first you're here, + </p> + <p> + I dare not let you in her room appear. + </p> + <p> + Besides, you have not got the right attire; + </p> + <p> + Undressed, in truth, is what she would desire. + </p> + <p> + My lady, you must know, is gone to bed:— + </p> + <p> + Then, thrusting in a dressing room his head, + </p> + <p> + He there beheld the necessary fare, + </p> + <p> + Of night-cap, slippers, shirt, and combs for hair, + </p> + <p> + With perfumes too, in Rome the nicest known, + </p> + <p> + And fit for highest cardinals to own. + </p> + <p> + His clothes the learned doctor laid aside; + </p> + <p> + The aged female came his steps to guide; + </p> + <p> + Through passages she led him by the hand, + </p> + <p> + Where all was dark, and many turnings planned; + </p> + <p> + At once bewildered, and deprived of sight, + </p> + <p> + The lawyer tottered much for want of light. + </p> + <p> + At length she ope'd a door, and pushed the sage, + </p> + <p> + Where most unpleasantly he must engage, + </p> + <p> + Though doubtless ev'ry way his proper place:— + </p> + <p> + The school where he was used the LAWS to trace! + </p> + <p> + O'ercome with shame, confusion, and surprise, + </p> + <p> + He nearly fainted, vain 'twere to disguise. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE circumstances ran throughout the town; + </p> + <p> + Each student then was waiting in his gown; + </p> + <p> + Enough, no doubt, his fortunes to destroy; + </p> + <p> + The laugh went round, and all was jest and joy. + </p> + <p> + What, is he mad? said they, or would he seek + </p> + <p> + Some lass, and with her wish to have a freak? + </p> + <p> + Still worse arrived:—his beauteous spouse complained; + </p> + <p> + A trial followed, and distractions reigned; + </p> + <p> + Her relatives supported well the cause, + </p> + <p> + And represented, that the MAN of LAWS, + </p> + <p> + Occasioned jars and matrimonial strife; + </p> + <p> + That he was mad, and she, a prudent wife, + </p> + <p> + The marriage was annulled, and she withdrew: + </p> + <p> + Retirement now the lady would pursue, + </p> + <p> + In Vavoureuse a prelate blessed the dame, + </p> + <p> + And, at Saint Croissant, she a nun became. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Devil_in_Hell" id="Devil_in_Hell"></a>THE DEVIL IN HELL + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20261m.jpg" alt="20261m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20261.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">H</span>E surely must be wrong who loving fears; + </p> + <p> + And does not flee when beauty first appears. + </p> + <p> + Ye FAIR, with charms divine, I know your fame; + </p> + <p> + No more I'll burn my fingers in the flame. + </p> + <p> + From you a soft sensation seems to rise, + </p> + <p> + And, to the heart, advances through the eyes; + </p> + <p> + What there it causes I've no need to tell: + </p> + <p> + Some die of love, or languish in the spell. + </p> + <p> + Far better surely mortals here might do; + </p> + <p> + There's no occasion dangers to pursue. + </p> + <p> + By way of proof a charmer I will bring, + </p> + <p> + Whose beauty to a hermit gave the sting: + </p> + <p> + Thence, save the sin, which fully I except; + </p> + <p> + A very pleasant intercourse was kept; + </p> + <p> + Except the sin, again I must repeat, + </p> + <p> + My sentiments on this will never meet + </p> + <p> + The taste of him at Rome, who wine had swilled, + </p> + <p> + Till, to the throat, he thoroughly was filled, + </p> + <p> + And then exclaimed, is't not a sin to drink? + </p> + <p> + Such conduct horrid ever I shall think; + </p> + <p> + I wish to prove, e'en saints in fear should live; + </p> + <p> + The truth is clear:—our faults may Heav'n forgive; + </p> + <p> + If dread of punishment, from pow'rs divine, + </p> + <p> + Had led this friar in the proper line, + </p> + <p> + He never had the charming girl retained, + </p> + <p> + Who, young and artless, would your heart have gained. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HER name was Alibech, if I recollect; + </p> + <p> + Too innocent, deceptions to detect. + </p> + <p> + One day this lovely maiden having read, + </p> + <p> + How certain pious, holy saints were led, + </p> + <p> + The better to observe religious care, + </p> + <p> + To seek retirement in some lorn repair, + </p> + <p> + Where they, like Heav'nly Angels, moved around, + </p> + <p> + Some here, some there, were in concealment found, + </p> + <p> + Was quite delighted, strange as it may seem, + </p> + <p> + And presently she formed the frantick scheme, + </p> + <p> + Of imitating those her mind revered, + </p> + <p> + And to her plan most rigidly adhered. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WITH silent steps the innocent withdrew; + </p> + <p> + To mothers, sisters,—none she bade adieu. + </p> + <p> + Long time she walked through fields, and plain, and dale; + </p> + <p> + At length she gained a wood within a vale; + </p> + <p> + There met an aged man, who once might be, + </p> + <p> + Gay, airy, pleasing, blithe, gallant, and free, + </p> + <p> + But now a meagre skeleton was seen + </p> + <p> + The shadow only of what late he'd been: + </p> + <p> + Said she, good father, I have much desire + </p> + <p> + To be a saint: thither my hopes aspire; + </p> + <p> + I fain would merit reverence and prayer, + </p> + <p> + A festival have kept with anxious care; + </p> + <p> + What pleasure, ev'ry year, the palm in hand, + </p> + <p> + And, beaming round the head, a holy band, + </p> + <p> + Nice presents, flow'rs, and off'rings to receive + </p> + <p> + Your practice difficult must I believe? + </p> + <p> + Already I can fast for many days, + </p> + <p> + And soon should learn to follow all your ways. + </p> + <p> + Go, said the aged man, your plan resign; + </p> + <p> + I'd have you, as a friend, the state decline; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis not so easy sanctity to meet, + </p> + <p> + That fasting should suffice the boon to greet. + </p> + <p> + Heav'n guards from ill the maids and wives who fast, + </p> + <p> + Or holiness would very seldom last. + </p> + <p> + 'Tis requisite to practise other things; + </p> + <p> + These secrets are, which move by hidden springs; + </p> + <p> + A hermit, whom you'll find beneath yon' beech, <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + Can, better far than I, their virtues teach; + </p> + <p> + Go, seek him, pray, make haste if you are sage; + </p> + <p> + I ne'er retain such birds within my cage. + </p> + <p> + This having said, at once he left the belle, + </p> + <p> + And wisely shut the door, and barred his cell: + </p> + <p> + Not trusting hair-cloth, fasting, age, nor gout; + </p> + <p> + With beauty, anchorites themselves should doubt. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR pensive fair soon found the person meant, + </p> + <p> + A man whose soul was on religion bent; + </p> + <p> + His name was Rustick, young and warm in prayer; + </p> + <p> + Such youthful hermits of deception share. + </p> + <p> + Her holy wish, the girl to him expressed, + </p> + <p> + A wish most fervent doubtless to be blessed, + </p> + <p> + And felt so strongly, Alibech had fear, + </p> + <p> + Some day the mark might on her fruit appear. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A SMILE her innocence from Rustick drew; + </p> + <p> + Said he, in me you little learning view; + </p> + <p> + But what I've got, I'll readily divide, + </p> + <p> + And nothing from your senses try to hide. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE hermit surely would have acted right; + </p> + <p> + Such pupil to have sent away at sight. + </p> + <p> + He managed otherwise, as we shall state; + </p> + <p> + The consequences, let us now relate. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SINCE much he wished perfection to pursue; + </p> + <p> + He, to himself, exclaimed: what can'st thou do? + </p> + <p> + Watch, fast, and pray; wear hair-cloth too; but this + </p> + <p> + Is surely little that will lead to bliss; + </p> + <p> + All do as much, but with a FAIR to dwell, + </p> + <p> + And, never touch her, would be to excel; + </p> + <p> + 'Twere triumph 'mong the Heav'nly Angels thought; + </p> + <p> + Let's merit it, and keep what here is brought; + </p> + <p> + If I resist a thing so sweet and kind, + </p> + <p> + I gain the end that pow'rs divine designed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HE with him let the charming belle remain; + </p> + <p> + And confident he could at will abstain, + </p> + <p> + Both Satan and the flesh at once defied: + </p> + <p> + Two foes on mischief ready to decide. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BEHOLD our saints together in a hut; + </p> + <p> + Young Rustick, where a corner seemed to jut; + </p> + <p> + A bed of rushes for the novice placed, + </p> + <p> + Since sleeping on the floor had her debased, + </p> + <p> + Who, yet unused to hardships, much must feel: + </p> + <p> + 'Twas best that these should on her senses steal. + </p> + <p> + A little fruit, and bread not over fine, + </p> + <p> + She had for supper:—water too for wine. + </p> + <p> + The hermit fasted; but the lady fed, + </p> + <p> + And ate with appetite her fruit and bread. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + APART their place of rest, the maiden slept, + </p> + <p> + But something quite awake the other kept: + </p> + <p> + The Devil could by no means quiet rest, + </p> + <p> + Till he should get admitted as a guest. + </p> + <p> + He was received within the humble cell; + </p> + <p> + The friar's thoughts were on his smiling belle, + </p> + <p> + Her simple manners, fascinating grace, + </p> + <p> + Complexion, age; each feature he would trace; + </p> + <p> + The heaving bosom, and the beauteous charms; + </p> + <p> + That made him wish to clasp her in his arms. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BY passion moved, he bade at once adieu, + </p> + <p> + To hair-cloth, discipline, and fasting too; + </p> + <p> + Cried he, my saints are these; to them I'll pray; + </p> + <p> + From Alibech no longer he would stay, + </p> + <p> + But to her flew, and roused the girl from sleep: + </p> + <p> + Said he, so soon you should not silence keep, + </p> + <p> + It is not right:—there's something to be done, + </p> + <p> + Ere we suspend the converse we've begun: + </p> + <p> + 'Tis proper that, to please the pow'rs divine; + </p> + <p> + We Satan instantly in Hell confine; + </p> + <p> + He was created for no other end; + </p> + <p> + To block him up let's ev'ry effort lend. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IMMEDIATELY within the bed he slid, + </p> + <p> + When, scarcely knowing what young Rustick did; + </p> + <p> + And, unaccustomed to the mystick scene, + </p> + <p> + She knew not what the anchorite could mean, + </p> + <p> + Nor this nor that but, partly by consent, + </p> + <p> + And partly force, yet wishing to prevent, + </p> + <p> + Though not presuming to resist his sway + </p> + <p> + To him 'mid pain and pleasure, she gave way, + </p> + <p> + Believing ev'ry thing was most exact, + </p> + <p> + And, what the saint performed, a gracious act, + </p> + <p> + By thus the Devil shutting up in Hell, + </p> + <p> + Where he was destined with his imps to dwell. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HENCEFORTH 'twas requisite, if saint she'd be; + </p> + <p> + From martyrdom she must not think to flee, + </p> + <p> + For friar Rustick little sought to please: + </p> + <p> + The lesson was not given quite at ease, + </p> + <p> + Which made the girl (not much improved in wit) + </p> + <p> + Exclaim, this Devil mischief will commit; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis very plain, though strange it may appear + </p> + <p> + To hurt his prison e'en he'll persevere; + </p> + <p> + The injury now you clearly may perceive; + </p> + <p> + But, for the evil done, I shall not grieve: + </p> + <p> + Yet richly he deserves to be again + </p> + <p> + Shut up effectually in his domain. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IT shall be so, the anchorite replied; + </p> + <p> + Once more the mystick art was fully tried; + </p> + <p> + Such care he took, such charity was shown, + </p> + <p> + That Hell, by use, free with the Devil grown, + </p> + <p> + His presence pleasant always would have found; + </p> + <p> + Could Rustick equally have kept his ground. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + CRIED Alibech, 'tis very truly said, + </p> + <p> + No prison has so nice and soft a bed, + </p> + <p> + But presently the host will weary grow; + </p> + <p> + And here our pair soon discord seemed to show: + </p> + <p> + Hell, for the prisoner, in vain inquired; + </p> + <p> + Deaf was the fiend, and quietly retired; + </p> + <p> + Repeated calls of course must irksome prove: + </p> + <p> + The fair grew weary, when he would not move; + </p> + <p> + Her strong desire to be a saint declined; + </p> + <p> + And Rustick to get rid of her designed; + </p> + <p> + In this with him the belle agreed so well, + </p> + <p> + That secretly she left the hermit's cell, + </p> + <p> + And home returned in haste the shortest way; + </p> + <p> + But what the fair could to her parents say, + </p> + <p> + Is what I fain would know, though truly yet; + </p> + <p> + The full particulars I ne'er could get. + </p> + <p> + 'Tis probable she made them understand, + </p> + <p> + Her heart was prompted by divine command; + </p> + <p> + To try to be a saint; that they believed, + </p> + <p> + Or seemingly for truth the tale received. + </p> + <p> + Perhaps the parents were not quite exact, + </p> + <p> + In narrowly examining the fact; + </p> + <p> + Though some suspicions doubtless might arise + </p> + <p> + About her Hell, they could not well disguise; + </p> + <p> + But 'tis so formed that little can be seen, + </p> + <p> + And many jailors in it duped have been. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + FOR Alibech great feasting was prepared, + </p> + <p> + When, through simplicity, the girl declared, + </p> + <p> + To those around, without the least restraint, + </p> + <p> + How she had acted to be made a saint. + </p> + <p> + You'd surely no occasion, they replied, + </p> + <p> + To go so far instruction to provide, + </p> + <p> + When at your house you might have had, with ease, + </p> + <p> + Like secret lectures, just as you should please. + </p> + <p> + Said one, my brother could the thing have done; + </p> + <p> + Another cried,—my cousin would have run + </p> + <p> + To do the same; or Neherbal, who's near, + </p> + <p> + No novice in the business would appear; + </p> + <p> + He seeks your hand, which you'll be wise to take + </p> + <p> + Before he learns—what might a diff'rence make. + </p> + <p> + She took the hint, and he the fair received; + </p> + <p> + A handsome fortune many fears relieved; + </p> + <p> + This joined to num'rous charms that had the belle; + </p> + <p> + He fancied pure a most suspicious Hell, + </p> + <p> + And freely used the blessings Hymen sends; + </p> + <p> + May Heav'n like joys bestow on all our friends! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + <br /><br /> <a name="peter" id="peter"></a> <br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + NEIGHBOUR PETER'S MARE + </h2><p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">A</span> CERTAIN pious rector (John his name), + </p> + <p> + But little preached, except when vintage came; + </p> + <p> + And then no preparation he required + </p> + <p> + On this he triumphed and was much admired. + </p> + <p> + Another point he handled very well, + </p> + <p> + Though oft'ner he'd thereon have liked to dwell, + </p> + <p> + And this the children of the present day, + </p> + <p> + So fully know, there's naught for me to say: + </p> + <p> + John to the senses things so clearly brought, + </p> + <p> + That much by wives and husbands he was sought, + </p> + <p> + Who held his knowledge of superior price, + </p> + <p> + And paid attention to his sage advice. + </p> + <p> + Around, whatever conscience he might find, + </p> + <p> + To soft delights and easy ways inclined, + </p> + <p> + In person he would rigidly attend, + </p> + <p> + And seek to act the confessor and friend; + </p> + <p> + Not e'en his curate would he trust with these; + </p> + <p> + But zealously he tried to give them ease, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry where would due attention show, + </p> + <p> + Observing that divines should always know + </p> + <p> + Their flocks most thoroughly and visit round; + </p> + <p> + To give instruction and the truth expound. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AMONG the folks, to whom he visits paid, + </p> + <p> + Was neighbour Peter, one who used the spade; + </p> + <p> + A villager that God, in lieu of lands, + </p> + <p> + Had furnished only with a pair of hands, + </p> + <p> + To dig and delve, and by the mattock gain + </p> + <p> + Enough his wife and children to maintain. + </p> + <p> + Still youthful charms you in his spouse might trace; + </p> + <p> + The weather injured solely had her face, + </p> + <p> + But not the features which were perfect yet: + </p> + <p> + Some wish perhaps more blooming belles to get; + </p> + <p> + The rustick truly me would ne'er have pleased; + </p> + <p> + But such are oft by country parsons seized, + </p> + <p> + Who low amours and dishes coarse admire, + </p> + <p> + That palates more refined would not desire. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE pastor John would often on her leer, + </p> + <p> + just as a cur, when store of bones are near, + </p> + <p> + That would good pickings for his teeth afford, + </p> + <p> + Attentively behold the precious hoard, + </p> + <p> + And seem uneasy; move his feet and tail; + </p> + <p> + Now prick his ears; then fear he can't prevail, + </p> + <p> + The eyes still fixed upon the bite in sight, + </p> + <p> + Which twenty times to these affords delight, + </p> + <p> + Ere to his longing jaws the boon arrives, + </p> + <p> + However anxiously the suitor strives. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SELF-TORMENTS solely parson John obtained; + </p> + <p> + By seeing her that o'er his senses reigned. + </p> + <p> + The village-wife was innocent of this, + </p> + <p> + And never dreamed of any thing amiss; + </p> + <p> + The pastor's mystick looks, nor flatt'ring ways; + </p> + <p> + Nor presents, aught in Magdalene could raise; + </p> + <p> + But nosegays made of thyme, and marj'ram too, + </p> + <p> + Were dropt on ground, or never kept in view; + </p> + <p> + A hundred little cares appeared as naught + </p> + <p> + 'Twas Welch to her, and ne'er conveyed a thought. + </p> + <p> + A pleasant stratagem he now contrived, + </p> + <p> + From which, he hoped, success might be derived. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + MOST clearly Peter was a heavy lout, + </p> + <p> + Yet truly I could never have a doubt, + </p> + <p> + That rashly he would ne'er himself commit, + </p> + <p> + Though folly 'twere from him to look for wit, + </p> + <p> + Or aught expect by questioning to find + </p> + <p> + 'Yond this to reason, he was not designed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE rector to him said, thou'rt poor, my friend, + </p> + <p> + And hast not half enough for food to spend, + </p> + <p> + With other things that necessary prove, + </p> + <p> + If we below with comfort wish to move. + </p> + <p> + Some day I'll show thee how thou may'st procure + </p> + <p> + The means that will thy happiness insure, + </p> + <p> + And make thee feel contented as a king. + </p> + <p> + To me what present for it wilt thou bring? <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ZOOKS! Peter answered, parson, I desire, + </p> + <p> + You'll me direct to do as you require; + </p> + <p> + My labour pray command; 'tis all I've got; + </p> + <p> + Our pig howe'er to you we can allot, + </p> + <p> + We want it not; and truly it has eat + </p> + <p> + More bran than thrice this vessel would complete; + </p> + <p> + The cow you'll take besides, from which my wife + </p> + <p> + A calf expects, to raise the means of life. + </p> + <p> + No, no, the pastor with a smile replied, + </p> + <p> + A recompense for this thou'lt not provide; + </p> + <p> + My neighbour to oblige is all I heed; + </p> + <p> + And now I'll tell thee how thou must proceed; + </p> + <p> + Thy spouse, by magick, I'll transform each day, + </p> + <p> + And turn her to a mare for cart or dray, + </p> + <p> + And then again restore her ev'ry night, + </p> + <p> + To human form to give thy heart delight. + </p> + <p> + From this to thee great profit will arise; + </p> + <p> + Thy ass, so slow is found, that when supplies, + </p> + <p> + It carries to the market, 'tis so late, + </p> + <p> + The hour is almost past ere at the gate, + </p> + <p> + And then thy cabbages, and herbs, and roots, + </p> + <p> + Provisions, provender, and wares and fruits, + </p> + <p> + Remain unsold, and home to spoil are brought, + </p> + <p> + Since rarely far from thence such things are sought. + </p> + <p> + But when thy wife's a mare, she'll faster go: + </p> + <p> + Strong, active, ev'ry way her worth she'll show, + </p> + <p> + And home will come without expense in meat: + </p> + <p> + No soup nor bread, but solely herbs she'll eat: <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SAID Peter, parson, clearly you are wise; + </p> + <p> + From learning, what advantages arise! + </p> + <p> + Is this pray sold?—If I'd much money got, + </p> + <p> + To make the purchase I'd the cash allot. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + CONTINUED John:—now I will thee instruct, + </p> + <p> + The proper manner, matters to conduct, + </p> + <p> + For thee to have a clever mare by day, + </p> + <p> + And still at night a charming wife survey; + </p> + <p> + Face, legs, and ev'ry thing shall reappear; + </p> + <p> + Come, see it done, and I'll perform it here; + </p> + <p> + Thou'lt then the method fully comprehend; + </p> + <p> + But hold thy tongue, or all will quickly end: + </p> + <p> + A single word the magick would dispel, + </p> + <p> + And, during life, no more with us 'twould dwell. + </p> + <p> + Keep close thy mouth and merely ope' thy eyes: + </p> + <p> + A glimpse alone to learn it will suffice; + </p> + <p> + This o'er, thyself shall practise it the same, + </p> + <p> + And all will follow as when first it came. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE husband promised he would hold his tongue; + </p> + <p> + And John disliked deferring matters long. + </p> + <p> + Come, Magdalene, said he, you will undress; + </p> + <p> + To quit those Sunday-clothes, you'll acquiesce, + </p> + <p> + And put yourself in Nature's pure array + </p> + <p> + Well, well, proceed; with stays and sleeves away; + </p> + <p> + That's better still; now petticoats lay by; + </p> + <p> + How nicely with my orders you comply. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN Magdalene was to the linen come, + </p> + <p> + Some marks of shame around her senses swum; + </p> + <p> + A wife to live and die was her desire, + </p> + <p> + Much rather than be seen in Eve's attire; + </p> + <p> + She vowed that, spite of what the priest disclosed; + </p> + <p> + She never would consent to be exposed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20271m.jpg" alt="20271m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20271.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + SAID Peter, pretty work, upon my truth:— + </p> + <p> + Not let us see how you are made forsooth! + </p> + <p> + What silly scruples!—Are they in your creed? + </p> + <p> + You were not always led such scenes to heed: + </p> + <p> + Pray how d'ye manage when for fleas you seek? + </p> + <p> + 'Tis strange, good sir, that she should be so weak; + </p> + <p> + What can you fear?—'tis folly time to waste; + </p> + <p> + He will not eat you: come, I say, make haste: + </p> + <p> + Have done with haggling; had you acted right, + </p> + <p> + Ere now the parson all had finished quite. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ON saying this, her garment off he took; + </p> + <p> + Put on his spectacles to overlook; + </p> + <p> + And parson John, without delay, began; + </p> + <p> + Said he (as o'er her person now he ran), + </p> + <p> + This part umbilical will make the mare + </p> + <p> + A noble breast, and strength at once declare: + </p> + <p> + Then further on the pastor placed his hand, + </p> + <p> + While, with the other, (as a magick wand,) + </p> + <p> + He set about transforming mounts of snow; + </p> + <p> + That in our climes a genial warmth bestow, + </p> + <p> + And semi-globes are called, while those that rise + </p> + <p> + In t'other hemisphere, of larger size, + </p> + <p> + Are seldom mentioned, through respect no doubt, + </p> + <p> + But these howe'er the parson, quite devout, + </p> + <p> + Would not neglect, and whatsoe'er he felt, + </p> + <p> + He always named, and on its beauties dwelt; + </p> + <p> + The ceremony this, it seems, required, + </p> + <p> + And fully ev'ry movement John admired. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + PROCEEDINGS so minute gave Peter pain, + </p> + <p> + And as he could not see the rector gain + </p> + <p> + The slightest change, he prayed the pow'rs divine, + </p> + <p> + To give assistance to the priest's design; + </p> + <p> + But this was vain, since all the magick spell, + </p> + <p> + In metamorphosing the lady well, + </p> + <p> + Depended on the fixing of the tail; + </p> + <p> + Without this ornament the whole would fail. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + To set it on the parson hastened now, + </p> + <p> + When Neighbour Peter 'gan to knit his brow, + </p> + <p> + And bawled so loud, you might have heard him far: + </p> + <p> + No tail, said he, I'll have: there'll be a scar; + </p> + <p> + You put it on too low; but vain his cries, + </p> + <p> + The husband's diligence would not suffice, + </p> + <p> + For, spite of ev'ry effort, much was done, + </p> + <p> + And John completely his career had run, + </p> + <p> + If Peter had not pulled the rector's gown, + </p> + <p> + Who hastily replied, thou ninny, clown; + </p> + <p> + Did I not tell thee silence to observe, + </p> + <p> + And not a footstep from thy station swerve? + </p> + <p> + The whole is spoiled, insufferable elf! + </p> + <p> + And for it thou hast got to thank thyself. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20279m.jpg" alt="20279m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20279.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + THE husband, while the holy pastor spoke, + </p> + <p> + Appeared to grumble and his stars invoke. + </p> + <p> + The wife was in a rage, and 'gan to scold: + </p> + <p> + Said she to Peter, wretch that I behold! + </p> + <p> + Thou'lt be through life a prey to pain and grief, + </p> + <p> + Come not to me and bray and hope relief, + </p> + <p> + The worthy pastor would have us procured + </p> + <p> + The means that might much comfort have ensured. + </p> + <p> + Can he deserve such treatment to receive? + </p> + <p> + Good Mister John this goose I now would leave, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry morning, while he gathers fruits, + </p> + <p> + Or plants, herbs, cabbages, and various roots, + </p> + <p> + Without averting him, pray, here repair, + </p> + <p> + You'll soon transform me to a charming mare. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + No mare, replied the husband, I desire; + </p> + <p> + An ass for me is all that I require. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Spectacles" id="Spectacles"></a>THE SPECTACLES + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20283m.jpg" alt="20283m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20283.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">I</span> LATELY vowed to leave the nuns alone, + </p> + <p> + So oft their freaks have in my page been shown. + </p> + <p> + The subject may at length fatigue the mind; + </p> + <p> + My Muse the veil howe'er is still inclined, + </p> + <p> + Conspicuously to hold to publick view, + </p> + <p> + And, 'mong the sisters, scene and scene pursue. + </p> + <p> + Is this too much?—the nicest tricks they play; + </p> + <p> + Through soft amours oft artfully they stray, + </p> + <p> + And these in full I'd readily detail, + </p> + <p> + If I were sure the subject would not fail; + </p> + <p> + And that's impossible I must admit, + </p> + <p> + 'Twould endless be, the tales appear so fit; + </p> + <p> + There's not a clerk so expeditious found, + </p> + <p> + Who could record the stories known around. + </p> + <p> + The sisters to forget, were I to try, + </p> + <p> + Suspicions might arise that, by and by, + </p> + <p> + I should return: some case might tempt my pen; + </p> + <p> + So oft I've overrun the convent-den, + </p> + <p> + Like one who always makes, from time to time, + </p> + <p> + The conversation with his feelings chime. + </p> + <p> + But let us to an end the subject bring, + </p> + <p> + And after this, of other matters sing. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IN former times was introduced a lad + </p> + <p> + Among the nuns, and like a maiden clad; + </p> + <p> + A charming girl by all he was believed; + </p> + <p> + Fifteen his age; no doubts were then conceived; + </p> + <p> + Coletta was the name the youth had brought, + </p> + <p> + And, till he got a beard, was sister thought. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE period howsoe'er was well employed, + </p> + <p> + And from it Agnes profit had enjoyed; + </p> + <p> + What profit?—truly better had I said, + </p> + <p> + That sister Agnes by him was misled, + </p> + <p> + And store of ills received; misfortune dire + </p> + <p> + Obliged the nun more girdle to require, + </p> + <p> + And ultimately to produce (in spite + </p> + <p> + Of ev'ry wish to guard the fact from light) + </p> + <p> + A little creature that our hist'ries say, + </p> + <p> + Was found Coletta's features to display. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + GREAT scandal quickly through the convent ran: + </p> + <p> + How could this child arrive?—the sisters 'gan + </p> + <p> + To laugh and ask, if in an evil hour, + </p> + <p> + The mushroom could have fallen with a show'r? + </p> + <p> + Or self-created was it not supposed? + </p> + <p> + Much rage the abbess presently disclosed; + </p> + <p> + To have her holy mansion thus disgraced! + </p> + <p> + Forthwith the culprit was in prison placed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE father to discover next they tried; + </p> + <p> + How could he enter, pass, escape, or hide; + </p> + <p> + The walls were high; the grate was double too; + </p> + <p> + Quite small the turning-box appeared to view, + </p> + <p> + And she who managed it was very old:— + </p> + <p> + Perhaps some youthful spark has been so bold, + </p> + <p> + Cried she who was superior to the rest, + </p> + <p> + To get admitted, like a maiden dressed, + </p> + <p> + And 'mong our flock (if rightly I surmise) + </p> + <p> + A wicked wolf is lurking in disguise. + </p> + <p> + Undress, I say, I'll verify the fact; + </p> + <p> + No other way remains for me to act. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE lad disguised was terrified to death; + </p> + <p> + Each plan was dissipated with a breath; + </p> + <p> + The more he thought of means from thence to get, + </p> + <p> + The greater were the obstacles he met. + </p> + <p> + At length NECESSITY (the parent found + </p> + <p> + Of stratagems and wiles, so much renowned,) + </p> + <p> + Induced the youth . . . (I scarcely can proceed) + </p> + <p> + To tie . . . expression here I clearly need; + </p> + <p> + What word will decently express the thought? + </p> + <p> + What book has got it?—where should it be sought? + </p> + <p> + You've heard, in days of yore that human kind, + </p> + <p> + With windows in their bosoms were designed, + </p> + <p> + Through which 'twas easy all within to see, + </p> + <p> + And suited those of medical degree. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BUT if these windows useful were believed; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas inconvenient in the heart perceived, + </p> + <p> + And women thoroughly disliked the scheme:— + </p> + <p> + They could not find the means to hide a dream. + </p> + <p> + Dame Nature howsoe'er contrived a plan:— + </p> + <p> + One lace she gave the woman, one the man, + </p> + <p> + Of equal length, and each enough no doubt, + </p> + <p> + By proper care to shut the ope throughout. + </p> + <p> + The woman much too thick her eyelets placed; + </p> + <p> + And consequently, ne'er was closely laced; + </p> + <p> + The fault was all her own: herself the cause; + </p> + <p> + The man as little merited applause, + </p> + <p> + For coarsely working, soon the hole was shut, + </p> + <p> + From which the remnant lace was left to jut; + </p> + <p> + In fact, on either side, whate'er was done, + </p> + <p> + The laces never equally would run, + </p> + <p> + And we are told, both sexes acted wrong: + </p> + <p> + The woman's was too short; the man's too long. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + FROM this 'tis easy, it should seem to guess: + </p> + <p> + What by the youth was tied in this distress + </p> + <p> + The end of lace that by the men was left, + </p> + <p> + When nature ordered them to close the cleft: + </p> + <p> + With thread he fastened it so very well, + </p> + <p> + That all was flat as any nun or belle; + </p> + <p> + But thread or silk, you cannot find a string + </p> + <p> + To hold, what soon I fear will give a spring, + </p> + <p> + And get away, in spite of all you do; + </p> + <p> + Bring saints or angels such a scene to view, + </p> + <p> + As twenty nuns in similar array, + </p> + <p> + Strange creatures I should think them:—merely clay, + </p> + <p> + If they should at the sight unmoved remain; + </p> + <p> + I speak of nuns, howe'er, whose charms maintain + </p> + <p> + Superior rank, and like the Graces seem, + </p> + <p> + Delightful sisters! ev'ry way supreme. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE prioress, this secret to disclose, + </p> + <p> + Appeared with spectacles upon her nose; + </p> + <p> + And twenty nuns around a dress displayed; + </p> + <p> + That convent mantua-makers never made, + </p> + <p> + Imagine to yourself what felt the youth, + </p> + <p> + 'Mid this examination of the truth. + </p> + <p> + The nice proportions and the lily charms + </p> + <p> + Soon raised within his bosom dire alarms; + </p> + <p> + Like magick operated on the string, + </p> + <p> + And from it, what was tied, soon gave a spring; + </p> + <p> + Broke loose at once, just like a mettled steed, + </p> + <p> + That, having slipt its halter, flies with speed; + </p> + <p> + Against the abbess' nose with force it flew, + </p> + <p> + And spectacles from her proboscis threw. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THOUGH she had nearly fallen on the floor, + </p> + <p> + In thus attempting secrets to explore, + </p> + <p> + No jest she thought the accident, 'twas plain, + </p> + <p> + But would with force the discipline maintain. + </p> + <p> + A chapter instantly the lady held; + </p> + <p> + Long time upon the circumstance they dwelled. + </p> + <p> + The youthful wolf that caused the direful shock; + </p> + <p> + At length was given to the aged flock, + </p> + <p> + Who tied his hands and bound him to a tree + </p> + <p> + Face 'gainst the wood, that none his front might see; + </p> + <p> + And while the cruel troop, with rage inflamed, + </p> + <p> + Considered of rewards that vengeance framed; + </p> + <p> + While some the besoms from the kitchen brought; + </p> + <p> + And others, in the convent ars'nal sought + </p> + <p> + The various instruments the sisters used + </p> + <p> + To punish when obedience was refused; + </p> + <p> + Another double-locked, within a room. + </p> + <p> + The nuns of tender hearts and youthful bloom:— + </p> + <p> + By chance, a friend to sly gallants appeared, + </p> + <p> + And soon removed, what most our hero feared: + </p> + <p> + A miller mounted on his mule came by, + </p> + <p> + A tight-built active lad with piercing eye; + </p> + <p> + One much admired by all the girls around; + </p> + <p> + Played well at kayles:—a good companion found. + </p> + <p> + Aha! cried he, what's here?—a nice affair; + </p> + <p> + Young man, pray tell me who has placed thee there? + </p> + <p> + The sisters, say'st thou?—hast thou had thy fun, + </p> + <p> + And pleased thy fancy with a wanton nun? + </p> + <p> + Art satisfied?—and was she pretty too? + </p> + <p> + In truth, to judge by what appears to view, + </p> + <p> + Thou seemest thoroughly a wily wight, + </p> + <p> + That convent belles would relish morn and night. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ALAS! replied the other with a sigh, + </p> + <p> + In vain the nuns my virtue sought to try; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas my misfortune:—patience heav'n bestow; + </p> + <p> + For worlds such wickedness I would not know. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE miller laughed at what the other spoke; + </p> + <p> + Untied his hands, and ev'ry bandage broke. + </p> + <p> + Said he, thou ninny, scruples can'st thou find + </p> + <p> + To counteract, and prove to pleasure blind? + </p> + <p> + The business clearly should to me belong; + </p> + <p> + Our rector ne'er had thought such conduct wrong, + </p> + <p> + And never would have played the fool like this; + </p> + <p> + Fly, haste away, away; I'll thee dismiss, + </p> + <p> + First having nicely set me in thy place; + </p> + <p> + Like me thou wert not formed for soft embrace; + </p> + <p> + I'm stout and able:—quarter ne'er will ask; + </p> + <p> + Come ALL, these nuns, I'll execute the task, + </p> + <p> + And many pranks they'll see, unless a freak + </p> + <p> + Should happen any way the string to break. + </p> + <p> + The other never asked his wishes twice, + </p> + <p> + But tied him well, and left him in a trice. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WITH shoulders broad the miller you might see; + </p> + <p> + In Adam's birth-attire against the tree, + </p> + <p> + Await the coming of the aged band, + </p> + <p> + Who soon appeared, with tapers in the hand, + </p> + <p> + In solemn guise, and whips and scourges dire: + </p> + <p> + The virgin troop (as convent laws require) + </p> + <p> + In full procession moved around the Wight; + </p> + <p> + Without allowing time to catch his sight, + </p> + <p> + Or giving notice what they meant to do: + </p> + <p> + How now! cried he:—why won't you take a view? + </p> + <p> + Deceived you are; regard me well I pray; + </p> + <p> + I'm not the silly fool you had to-day, + </p> + <p> + Who woman hates, and scruples seeks to raise: + </p> + <p> + Employ but me, and soon I'll gain your praise; + </p> + <p> + I'll wonders execute; my strength appears; + </p> + <p> + And; if I fail, at once cut off my ears. + </p> + <p> + At certain pleasant play I'm clever found; + </p> + <p> + But as to whips—I never was renowned. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHAT means the fellow? cried a toothless nun; + </p> + <p> + What would he tell us? Hast thou nothing done? + </p> + <p> + How!—Art thou not our brat-begetter?—speak; + </p> + <p> + So much the worse:—on thee our rage we'll wreak, + </p> + <p> + For him that's gone we'll make thee suffer now; + </p> + <p> + Once arms in hand, we never will allow + </p> + <p> + Such characters full punishment to miss; + </p> + <p> + The play that we desire is THIS and THIS; + </p> + <p> + Then whips and scourges round him 'gan to move, + </p> + <p> + And not a little troublesome to prove + </p> + <p> + The miller, writhing with the poignant smart, + </p> + <p> + Cried loudly:—I'll exert my utmost art, + </p> + <p> + Good ladies, to perform what is your due; + </p> + <p> + The more he bawled, the faster lashes flew. + </p> + <p> + This work so well the aged troop achieved, + </p> + <p> + He long remembered what his skin received. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHILE thus the master chastisement had got; + </p> + <p> + His mule was feeding on the verdant spot. + </p> + <p> + But what became of this or that, at last, + </p> + <p> + I've never heard, and care not how it past. + </p> + <p> + 'Tis quite enough to save the young gallant, + </p> + <p> + And more particulars we do not want. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + My readers, for a time, could they obtain + </p> + <p> + A dozen nuns like these, where beauties reign, + </p> + <p> + Would doubtless not be seen without their dress! + </p> + <p> + We do not always ev'ry wish express. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Bucking_Tub" id="Bucking_Tub"></a>THE BUCKING-TUB + </h2><p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">I</span>F once in love, you'll soon invention find + </p> + <p> + And not to cunning tricks and freaks be blind; + </p> + <p> + The youngest 'prentice, when he feels the dart, + </p> + <p> + Grows wondrous shrewd, and studies wily art. + </p> + <p> + This passion never, we perceive, remains + </p> + <p> + In want from paucity of scheming brains. + </p> + <p> + The god of hearts so well exerts his force, + </p> + <p> + That he receives his dues as things of course. + </p> + <p> + A bucking-tub, of which a tale is told, + </p> + <p> + Will prove the case, and this I'll now unfold; + </p> + <p> + Particulars I heard some days ago, + </p> + <p> + From one who seemed each circumstance to know. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WITHIN a country town, no matter where, + </p> + <p> + Its appellation nothing would declare, + </p> + <p> + A cooper and his wife, whose name was Nan, + </p> + <p> + Kept house, and through some difficulties ran. + </p> + <p> + Though scanty were their means, LOVE thither flew; + </p> + <p> + And with him brought a friend to take a view; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas Cuckoldom accompanied the boy, + </p> + <p> + Two gods most intimate, who like to toy, + </p> + <p> + And, never ceremonious, seek to please + </p> + <p> + Go where they will, still equally at ease; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis all for them good lodging, fare, or bed; + </p> + <p> + And, hut or palace, pleasantly they tread. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IT happened then, a spark this fair caressed, + </p> + <p> + And, when he hoped most fully to be blessed, + </p> + <p> + When all was ready to complete the scene, + </p> + <p> + And on a point:—if naught should intervene + </p> + <p> + Not NAMED howe'er will quite enough suffice, + </p> + <p> + When suddenly the husband, by surprise, + </p> + <p> + Returned from drinking at an ale-house near, + </p> + <p> + just when, just when:—the rest is pretty clear. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THEY curst his coming; trouble o'er them spread; + </p> + <p> + Naught could be done but hide the lover's head; + </p> + <p> + Beneath a bucking-tub, in utmost haste, + </p> + <p> + Within the court, our gay gallant was placed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20297m.jpg" alt="20297m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20297.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + THE husband, as he entered, loudly cried, + </p> + <p> + I've sold our bucking-tub. The wife replied, + </p> + <p> + What price, I pray?—Three crowns rejoined the man; + </p> + <p> + Then thou'rt a silly ass, said mistress Nan; + </p> + <p> + To-day, by my address, I've gained a crown, + </p> + <p> + And sold the same for twenty shillings down: + </p> + <p> + My bargain luckily the first was made; + </p> + <p> + The buyer, (who of flaws is much afraid) + </p> + <p> + Examines now if ev'ry part is tight; + </p> + <p> + He's in the tub to see if all be right. + </p> + <p> + What, blockhead, would'st thou do without thy wife? + </p> + <p> + Thou huntest taverns while she works for life; + </p> + <p> + But necessary 'tis for her to act, + </p> + <p> + When thou art out, or naught would be exact. + </p> + <p> + No pleasure ever yet received have I; + </p> + <p> + But take my word, to get it now I'll try. + </p> + <p> + Gallants are plenty; husbands should have wives; + </p> + <p> + That, like themselves, lead gay or sober lives. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + I PRYTHEE softly, wife, the husband said; + </p> + <p> + Come, come, sir, leave the tub, there's naught to dread; + </p> + <p> + When you are out, I'll ev'ry quarter scrape, + </p> + <p> + Then try if water from it can escape; + </p> + <p> + I'll warrant it to be as good as nice, + </p> + <p> + And nothing can be better worth the price. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUT came the lover; in the husband went; + </p> + <p> + Scraped here and there, and tried if any vent; + </p> + <p> + With candle in his hand looked round and round, + </p> + <p> + Not dreaming once that LOVE without was found. + </p> + <p> + But nothing he could see of what was done; + </p> + <p> + And while the cooper sought to overrun + </p> + <p> + The various parts, and by the tub was hid, + </p> + <p> + The gods already noticed thither slid; + </p> + <p> + A job was by the deities proposed, + </p> + <p> + That highly pleased the couple when disclosed; + </p> + <p> + A very diff'rent work from what within + </p> + <p> + The husband had, who scraped with horrid din, + </p> + <p> + And rubbed, and scrubbed, and beat so very well, + </p> + <p> + Fresh courage took our gay gallant and belle; + </p> + <p> + They now resumed the thread so sadly lost, + </p> + <p> + When, by the cooper's coming, all was crossed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE reader won't require to know the rest; + </p> + <p> + What passed perhaps may easily be guessed. + </p> + <p> + 'Tis quite enough, my thesis I have proved; + </p> + <p> + The artful trick our pair with raptures moved. + </p> + <p> + Nor one nor t'other was a 'prentice new; + </p> + <p> + A lover be:—and wiles you'll soon pursue. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + + <p> + <a name="p231b" id="p231b"></a><img alt="p231b.jpg (45K)" + src="images/p231b.jpg" height="515" width="652" /> + </p> + + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Impossible_Thing" id="Impossible_Thing"></a>THE IMPOSSIBLE + THING + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20301m.jpg" alt="20301m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20301.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">A</span> DEMON, blacker in his skin than heart, + </p> + <p> + So great a charm was prompted to impart; + </p> + <p> + To one in love, that he the lady gained, + </p> + <p> + And full possession in the end obtained: + </p> + <p> + The bargain was, the lover should enjoy + </p> + <p> + The belle he wished, and who had proved so coy. + </p> + <p> + Said Satan, soon I'll make her lend an ear, + </p> + <p> + In ev'ry thing more complaisant appear; + </p> + <p> + But then, instead of what thou might'st expect, + </p> + <p> + To be obedient and let me direct, + </p> + <p> + The devil, having thus obliged a friend, + </p> + <p> + He'll thy commands obey, thou may'st depend, + </p> + <p> + The very moment; and within the hour + </p> + <p> + Thy humble servant, who has got such pow'r, + </p> + <p> + Will ask for others, which at once thou'lt find; + </p> + <p> + Make no delay, for if thou art so blind, + </p> + <p> + Thou comprehend'st, thy body and thy soul + </p> + <p> + The lovely fair no longer shall control, + </p> + <p> + But Satan then upon them both shall seize, + </p> + <p> + And with them do-whatever he may please: + </p> + <p> + 'Gainst this the spark had not a word to say; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas pleasing to command, though not obey. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HE sallied forth the beauteous belle to seek, + </p> + <p> + And found her as he wished:—complying-meek; + </p> + <p> + Indulged in blisses, and most happy proved, + </p> + <p> + Save that the devil always round him moved. + </p> + <p> + Whatever rose within the whirl of thought + </p> + <p> + He now commanded:—quickly it was brought; + </p> + <p> + And when he ordered palaces to rise, + </p> + <p> + Or raging tempests to pervade the skies, + </p> + <p> + The devil instantly obeyed his will, + </p> + <p> + And what he asked was done with wondrous skill. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20305m.jpg" alt="20305m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20305.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + LARGE sums his purse received;—the devil went + </p> + <p> + just where commanded, and to Rome was sent, + </p> + <p> + From whence his highness store of pardons got; + </p> + <p> + No journey long, though distant was the spot, + </p> + <p> + But ev'ry thing with magick ease arose, + </p> + <p> + And all was soon accomplished that he chose. + </p> + <p> + So oft the spark was asked for orders new, + </p> + <p> + Which he was bound to give the fiend at view, + </p> + <p> + That soon his head most thoroughly was drained, + </p> + <p> + And to the fair our lover much complained, + </p> + <p> + Declared the truth, and ev'ry thing detailed, + </p> + <p> + How he was lost, if in commands he failed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IS'T this, said she, that makes thee so forlorn? + </p> + <p> + Mere nothing!-quickly I'll remove the thorn; + </p> + <p> + When Satan comes, present his highness this, + </p> + <p> + Which I have here, and say:—You will not miss + </p> + <p> + To make it flat, and not its curl retain + </p> + <p> + On which she gave him, what with little pain + </p> + <p> + She drew from covert of the Cyprian grove, + </p> + <p> + The fairy labyrinth where pleasures rove, + </p> + <p> + Which formerly a duke so precious thought; + </p> + <p> + To raise a knightly order thence he sought, + </p> + <p> + Illustrious institution, noble plan, + </p> + <p> + More filled with gods and demi-gods than man. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE lover to the crafty devil said:— + </p> + <p> + 'Tis crooked this, you see, and I am led + </p> + <p> + To wish it otherwise; go, make it straight; + </p> + <p> + A perfect line: no turn, nor twist, nor plait. + </p> + <p> + Away to work, be quick, fly, hasten, run; + </p> + <p> + The demon fancied it could soon be done; + </p> + <p> + No time he lost, but set it in the press, + </p> + <p> + And tried to manage it with great success; + </p> + <p> + The massy hammer, kept beneath the deep, + </p> + <p> + Made no impression: he as well might sleep; + </p> + <p> + Howe'er he beat: whatever charm he used:— + </p> + <p> + 'Twas still the same; obedience it refused. + </p> + <p> + His time and labour constantly were lost; + </p> + <p> + Vain proved each effort: mystick skill was crossed; + </p> + <p> + The wind, or rain, or fog, or frost, or snow, + </p> + <p> + Had no effect: still circular 'twould go. + </p> + <p> + The more he tried, the ringlet less inclined + </p> + <p> + To drop the curvature so closely twined. + </p> + <p> + How's this? said Satan, never have I seen + </p> + <p> + Such stubborn stuff wherever I have been; + </p> + <p> + The shades below no demon can produce, + </p> + <p> + That could divine what here would prove of use: + </p> + <p> + 'Twould puzzle hell to break the curling spring, + </p> + <p> + And make a line direct of such a thing. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ONE morn the devil to the other went: + </p> + <p> + Said he, to give thee up I'll be content; + </p> + <p> + If solely thou wilt openly declare + </p> + <p> + What 'tis I hold, for truly I despair; + </p> + <p> + I'm victus I confess, and can't succeed: + </p> + <p> + No doubt the thing's impossible decreed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + FRIEND Satan, said the lover, you are wrong; + </p> + <p> + Despondency should not to you belong, + </p> + <p> + At least so soon:—what you desire to know + </p> + <p> + Is not the only one that's found to grow; + </p> + <p> + Still many more companions it has got, + </p> + <p> + And others could be taken from the spot. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Picture" id="Picture"></a>THE PICTURE + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20309m.jpg" alt="20309m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20309.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">S</span>OLICITED I've been to give a tale, + </p> + <p> + In which (though true, decorum must prevail), + </p> + <p> + The subject from a picture shall arise, + </p> + <p> + That by a curtain's kept from vulgar eyes. + </p> + <p> + My brain must furnish various features new: + </p> + <p> + What's delicate and smart produce to view; + </p> + <p> + By this expressed, and not by t'other said: + </p> + <p> + And all so clear, most easy to be read, + </p> + <p> + By ev'ry fool, without the aid of notes, + </p> + <p> + That idiot's bad indeed who never quotes. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + CATULLUS tells us, ev'ry matron sage + </p> + <p> + Will peep most willingly (whate'er her age), + </p> + <p> + At that gigantick gift, which Juno made, + </p> + <p> + To Venus' fruit, in gardens oft displayed. + </p> + <p> + If any belle recede, and shun the sight, + </p> + <p> + Dissimulation she supposes right. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS principle allowed, why scruples make? + </p> + <p> + Why, less than eyes, should ears a license take? + </p> + <p> + But since 'tis so resolved I'll do my best, + </p> + <p> + And naught in open terms shall be expressed: + </p> + <p> + A veil shall over ev'ry charm be cast, + </p> + <p> + Of gauze indeed, and this from first to last, + </p> + <p> + So nicely done, that howsoever tost, + </p> + <p> + To none I trust will any thing be lost. + </p> + <p> + Who nicely thinks, and speaks with graceful ease; + </p> + <p> + Can current make just whatsoe'er he please; + </p> + <p> + For all will pass, as I have often known: + </p> + <p> + The word well chosen, pardon soon is shown, + </p> + <p> + The sex o'erlook the thing no more the same, + </p> + <p> + The thought remains, but 'tis without a name; + </p> + <p> + No blush is raised; no difficulty found; + </p> + <p> + Yet ev'ry body understands around. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT present, much I need this useful art: + </p> + <p> + Why? you will ask; because, when I impart + </p> + <p> + Such wondrous circumstances, ev'ry belle, + </p> + <p> + Without reserve, will con them over well. + </p> + <p> + To this I answer: female ears are chaste, + </p> + <p> + Though roguish are their eyes, as well as taste. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BE that as 'twill, I certainly should like, + </p> + <p> + With freedom to explain, by terms oblique, + </p> + <p> + To belles, how this was broken:—that was down: + </p> + <p> + Assist me pray, ye NINE of high renown; + </p> + <p> + But you are maids, and strangers, we agree, + </p> + <p> + To LOVE'S soft scenes, not knowing A from B. + </p> + <p> + Remain then, Muses, never stir an inch, + </p> + <p> + But beg the god of verse, when at a pinch, + </p> + <p> + To help me out and kind assistance lend, + </p> + <p> + To choose expressions which will not offend, + </p> + <p> + Lest I some silly things should chance to say, + </p> + <p> + That might displeasure raise, and spoil my lay. + </p> + <p> + Enough, howe'er, we've on the subject said: + </p> + <p> + 'Tis time we t'wards the painting should be led, + </p> + <p> + Which an adventure you will find contains, + </p> + <p> + That happened once in Cupid's famed domains. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IN former days, just by Cythera town + </p> + <p> + A monastery was, of some renown, + </p> + <p> + With nuns the queens of beauty filled the place, + </p> + <p> + And gay gallants you easily might trace. + </p> + <p> + The courtier, citizen, and parson too, + </p> + <p> + The doctor and the bachelor you'd view, + </p> + <p> + With eager steps:—all visits thither made; + </p> + <p> + And 'mong the latter, one (a pleasing blade) + </p> + <p> + Had free access: was thought a prudent friend, + </p> + <p> + Who might to sisters many comforts lend; + </p> + <p> + Was always closely shaved and nicely dressed; + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry thing he said was well expressed; + </p> + <p> + The breath of scandal, howsoever pat, + </p> + <p> + Ne'er lighted on his neat cravat nor hat. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TWO nuns alternatively, from the youth; + </p> + <p> + Experienced many services, in truth; + </p> + <p> + The one had recently a novice been; + </p> + <p> + Few months had passed since she complete was seen; + </p> + <p> + The other still the dress of novice wore; + </p> + <p> + The youngest's age was seventeen years, not more + </p> + <p> + Time doubtless very proper (to be plain) + </p> + <p> + Love's wily thesis fully to sustain: + </p> + <p> + The bachelor so well the fair had taught, + </p> + <p> + And they so earnestly the science sought, + </p> + <p> + That by experience both the art had learned, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry thing most perfectly discerned. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THESE sisters eagerly had made one day + </p> + <p> + An assignation with the lover gay; + </p> + <p> + To have the entertainment quite complete, + </p> + <p> + They'd Bacchus, Ceres too, who Venus greet: + </p> + <p> + With perfect neatness all the meats were served, + </p> + <p> + And naught from grace and elegancy swerved; + </p> + <p> + The wines, the custards, jellies, creams, and ice: + </p> + <p> + The decorations, ev'ry thing was nice; + </p> + <p> + What pleasing objects and delights were viewed! + </p> + <p> + The room with sweetest flow'rs fair Flora strewed; + </p> + <p> + A sort of garden o'er the linen traced + </p> + <p> + Here lakes of love:—there names entwined were placed; + </p> + <p> + Magnificence like this the nuns admired, + </p> + <p> + And such amusements ardently desired. + </p> + <p> + Their beauty too incited to be free; + </p> + <p> + A thousand matters filled their souls with glee; + </p> + <p> + In height the belles were pretty much the same + </p> + <p> + Like alabaster fair; of perfect frame; + </p> + <p> + In num'rous corners Cupid nestling lay: + </p> + <p> + Beneath a stomacher he'd slyly play, + </p> + <p> + A veil or scapulary, this or that, + </p> + <p> + Where least the eye of day perceived he sat, + </p> + <p> + Unless a lover called to mystick bow'rs, + </p> + <p> + Where he might hearts entwine with chains of flow'rs; + </p> + <p> + A thousand times a day the urchin flew, + </p> + <p> + With open arms the sisters to pursue; + </p> + <p> + Their charms were such in ev'ry air and look, + </p> + <p> + Both (one by one) he for his mother took. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WITH anxious looks, the ladies thus prepared, + </p> + <p> + Expected him who all their kindness shared; + </p> + <p> + Now they bestowed abuse; next fondly praised: + </p> + <p> + Then of his conduct dark suspicions raised, + </p> + <p> + Conceived, a new amour him kept away: + </p> + <p> + What can it be, said one, that makes him stay? + </p> + <p> + Of honour an affair.—love—sickness—what? + </p> + <p> + Said t'other whether it be this or that, + </p> + <p> + If here again his face he ever show, + </p> + <p> + A pretty trick in turn we'll let him know. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHILE thus the couple sought their plot to frame, + </p> + <p> + A convent porter with a burden came, + </p> + <p> + For her who kept the stores of ev'ry kind, + </p> + <p> + Depositary of the whole designed. + </p> + <p> + 'Twas merely a pretence, as I am told: + </p> + <p> + The things were not required for young or old; + </p> + <p> + But she much appetite had got in truth, + </p> + <p> + Which made her have recourse to such a youth, + </p> + <p> + Who was regarded, in repasts like these, + </p> + <p> + A first rate cook that all prepared at ease. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS awkward, heavy lout mistook the cell; + </p> + <p> + By chance upon our ladies' room he fell, + </p> + <p> + And knocked with weighty hands: they ope'd the door. + </p> + <p> + And gave abuse, but soon their anger o'er, + </p> + <p> + The nuns conceived a treasure they had found, + </p> + <p> + And, laughing heartily, no longer frowned, + </p> + <p> + But both exclaimed at once: let's take this fool; + </p> + <p> + Of him we easily can make a tool; + </p> + <p> + As well as t'other, don't you think he'll do? + </p> + <p> + The eldest added:—let's our whim pursue; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis well determined;—What were we to get, + </p> + <p> + That here we waited, and are waiting yet? + </p> + <p> + Fine words and phrases; nothing of the kind; + </p> + <p> + This wight 's as good, for what we have a mind, + </p> + <p> + As any bachelor or doctor wise + </p> + <p> + At all events, for present, he'll suffice. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SHE rightly judged; his height, form, simple air, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry act, so clearly void of care, + </p> + <p> + Raised expectation; this was AEsop's man, + </p> + <p> + He never thought: 'twas all without a plan; + </p> + <p> + Both ate and drank, and, had he been at will, + </p> + <p> + Would matters far have pushed, though void of skill. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + FAMILIAR grown, the fellow ready seemed, + </p> + <p> + To execute whate'er was proper deemed; + </p> + <p> + To serve the convent he was porter made, + </p> + <p> + And in their wishes nuns of course obeyed. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + 'TIS here begins the subject we've in view, + </p> + <p> + The scene that faithfully our painter drew; + </p> + <p> + Apollo, give me aid, assistance lend, + </p> + <p> + Enable me, I pray, to comprehend, + </p> + <p> + Why this mean stupid rustick sat at ease, + </p> + <p> + And left the sisters (Claudia, formed to please, + </p> + <p> + And lovely fair Theresa) all the care? + </p> + <p> + Had he not better done to give a chair? <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20317m.jpg" alt="20317m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20317.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + I THINK I hear the god of verse reply: + </p> + <p> + Not quite so fast my friend, you may rely, + </p> + <p> + These matters never can the probe endure; + </p> + <p> + I understand you; Cupid, to be sure, + </p> + <p> + Is doubtless found a very roguish boy, + </p> + <p> + Who, though he please at times, will oft annoy; + </p> + <p> + I'm wrong a wicked whelp like this to take, + </p> + <p> + And, master of the ceremonies make. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NO sooner in a house the urchin gets, + </p> + <p> + But rules and laws he at defiance sets; + </p> + <p> + The place of reason whim at once assumes, + </p> + <p> + Breaks ev'ry obstacle, frets, rages, fumes. + </p> + <p> + With scenes like these will Cupid oft surprise, + </p> + <p> + And frantick passion sparkle in his eyes. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SOON on the floor was seen this boorish wight; + </p> + <p> + For, whether that the chair was rather slight, + </p> + <p> + Or that the composition of the clown + </p> + <p> + Was not, like that of geese, of softest down, + </p> + <p> + Or that Theresa, by her gay discourse, + </p> + <p> + Had penetrated to the mystick source, + </p> + <p> + The am'rous pulpit suddenly gave way, + </p> + <p> + And on the ground the rustick quickly lay. + </p> + <p> + The first attempt had clearly bad success, + </p> + <p> + And fair Theresa suffered you may guess. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + YE censors keep from hence your eyes prophane; + </p> + <p> + See, honest hearts, how Claudia tried amain, + </p> + <p> + To take advantage of the dire mishap, + </p> + <p> + And all she could, with eagerness entrap; + </p> + <p> + For in the fall Theresa lost her hold; + </p> + <p> + The other pushed her:—further off she rolled; + </p> + <p> + And then, what she had quitted Claudia seized; + </p> + <p> + Theresa, like a demon quite displeased, + </p> + <p> + Endeavoured to recover what she'd lost:— + </p> + <p> + Again to take her seat, but she was crossed. + </p> + <p> + The sister in possession ne'er inclined + </p> + <p> + To cede a post so pleasant to her mind; + </p> + <p> + Theresa raised her hand to give a stroke; + </p> + <p> + And what of that?—if any thing provoke + </p> + <p> + When thus engaged, unheeded it remains + </p> + <p> + Small ills are soon forgot where pleasure reigns. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20323m.jpg" alt="20323m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20323.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + IN spite of rage apparent in the face; + </p> + <p> + Of her who in the scuffle lost her place, + </p> + <p> + The other followed up the road she took; + </p> + <p> + His course the rustick also ne'er forsook. + </p> + <p> + Theresa scolded; anger marked her eyes; + </p> + <p> + In Venus' games contentions oft arise; + </p> + <p> + Their violence no parallel has seen:— + </p> + <p> + In proof, remember Menelaus' queen. + </p> + <p> + Though here to take a part Bellona 's found, + </p> + <p> + Of cuirasses I see but few around; + </p> + <p> + When Venus closes with the god of Thrace, + </p> + <p> + Her armour then appears with ev'ry grace. + </p> + <p> + The FAIR will understand: enough is said; + </p> + <p> + When beauty's goddess is to combat led, + </p> + <p> + Her body-cuirass shows superior charms; + </p> + <p> + The Cyclops rarely forge such pleasing arms. + </p> + <p> + Had Vulcan graven on Achilles' shield + </p> + <p> + The picture we've described, more praise 'twould yield. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE nun's adventure I in verse have told, + </p> + <p> + But not in colours, like the action, bold; + </p> + <p> + And as the story in the picture fails, + </p> + <p> + The latter seems to lose in my details. + </p> + <p> + The pen and brush express not quite the same; + </p> + <p> + Eyes are not ears, however we may aim. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ENTANGLED in the net, I long have left + </p> + <p> + The fair Theresa, of her throne bereft; + </p> + <p> + Howe'er, this sister had her turn we find, + </p> + <p> + So much to please, the porter was inclined, + </p> + <p> + That both were satisfied, and felt content; + </p> + <p> + Here ends our tale, and truly I lament, + </p> + <p> + That not a word about the feast is said, + </p> + <p> + Though I've no doubt, they freely drank and fed; + </p> + <p> + And this for reasons easily conceived: + </p> + <p> + The interlude gave rest that much relieved. + </p> + <p> + In fine, 'twas well throughout, except, in truth, + </p> + <p> + The hour of meeting settled with the youth, + </p> + <p> + Which much embarrasses I will avow, + </p> + <p> + For if he never came and made his bow, + </p> + <p> + The sisters had the means, when they might please, + </p> + <p> + Completely to console themselves at ease; + </p> + <p> + And if the spark appeared, the belles could hide + </p> + <p> + Both clown and chair, or any thing beside + </p> + <p> + The lover what he wanted soon possessed, + </p> + <p> + And was as usual treated with the best. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Pack-Saddle" id="Pack-Saddle"></a>THE PACK-SADDLE + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20325m.jpg" alt="20325m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20325.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">A</span> FAMOUS painter, jealous of his wife; + </p> + <p> + Whose charms he valued more than fame or life, + </p> + <p> + When going on a journey used his art, + </p> + <p> + To paint an ASS upon a certain part, + </p> + <p> + (Umbilical, 'tis said) and like a seal: + </p> + <p> + Impressive token, nothing thence to steal. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A BROTHER brush, enamoured of the dame; + </p> + <p> + Now took advantage, and declared his flame: + </p> + <p> + The Ass effaced, but God knows how 'twas done; + </p> + <p> + Another soon howe'er he had begun, + </p> + <p> + And finished well, upon the very spot; + </p> + <p> + In painting, few more praises ever got; + </p> + <p> + But want of recollection made him place + </p> + <p> + A saddle, where before he none could trace. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE husband, when returned, desired to look + </p> + <p> + At what he drew, when leave he lately took. + </p> + <p> + Yes, see my dear, the wily wife replied, + </p> + <p> + The Ass is witness, faithful I abide. + </p> + <p> + Zounds! said the painter, when he got a sight,— + </p> + <p> + What!—you'd persuade me ev'ry thing is right? + </p> + <p> + I wish the witness you display so well, + </p> + <p> + And him who saddled it, were both in Hell. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Earmaker" id="Earmaker"></a>THE EAR-MAKER AND + </h2> + <h2> + THE MOULD-MENDER + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20329m.jpg" alt="20329m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20329.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">W</span>HEN William went from home (a trader styled): + </p> + <p> + Six months his better half he left with child, + </p> + <p> + A simple, comely, modest, youthful dame, + </p> + <p> + Whose name was Alice; from Champaign she came. + </p> + <p> + Her neighbour Andrew visits now would pay; + </p> + <p> + With what intention, needless 'tis to say: + </p> + <p> + A master who but rarely spread his net, + </p> + <p> + But, first or last, with full success he met; + </p> + <p> + And cunning was the bird that 'scaped his snare; + </p> + <p> + Without surrendering a feather there. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + QUITE raw was Alice; for his purpose fit; + </p> + <p> + Not overburdened with a store of wit; + </p> + <p> + Of this indeed she could not be accused, + </p> + <p> + And Cupid's wiles by her were never used; + </p> + <p> + Poor lady, all with her was honest part, + </p> + <p> + And naught she knew of stratagem or art. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HER husband then away, and she alone, + </p> + <p> + This neighbour came, and in a whining tone, + </p> + <p> + To her observed, when compliments were o'er:— + </p> + <p> + I'm all astonishment, and you deplore, + </p> + <p> + To find that neighbour William's gone from hence, + </p> + <p> + And left your child's completing in suspense, + </p> + <p> + Which now you bear within, and much I fear, + </p> + <p> + That when 'tis born you'll find it wants an ear. + </p> + <p> + Your looks sufficiently the fact proclaim, + </p> + <p> + For many instances I've known the same. + </p> + <p> + Good heav'ns! replied the lady in a fright; + </p> + <p> + What say you, pray?—the infant won't be right! + </p> + <p> + Shall I be mother to a one-eared child? + </p> + <p> + And know you no relief that's certain styled? + </p> + <p> + Oh yes, there is, rejoined the crafty knave, + </p> + <p> + From such mishap I can the baby save; + </p> + <p> + Yet solemnly I vow, for none but you + </p> + <p> + I'd undertake the toilsome job to do. + </p> + <p> + The ills of others, if I may be plain, + </p> + <p> + Except your husband's, never give me pain; + </p> + <p> + But him I'd serve for ever, while I've breath; + </p> + <p> + To do him good I'd e'en encounter death. + </p> + <p> + Now let us see, without more talk or fears, + </p> + <p> + If I know how to forge the bantling ears. + </p> + <p> + Remember, cried the wife, to make them like. + </p> + <p> + Leave that to me, said he, I'll justly strike. + </p> + <p> + Then he prepared for work; the dame gave way; + </p> + <p> + Not difficult she proved:—well pleased she lay; + </p> + <p> + Philosophy was never less required, + </p> + <p> + And Andrew's process much the fair admired, + </p> + <p> + Who, to his work extreme attention paid; + </p> + <p> + 'Twas now a tendon; then a fold he made, + </p> + <p> + Or cartilage, of which he formed enough, + </p> + <p> + And all without complaining of the stuff. + </p> + <p> + To-morrow we will polish it, said he: + </p> + <p> + Then in perfection soon the whole will be; + </p> + <p> + And from repeating this so oft, you'll get + </p> + <p> + As perfect issue as was ever met. + </p> + <p> + I'm much obliged to you, the wife replied, + </p> + <p> + A friend is good in whom we may confide. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NEXT day, when tardy Time had marked the hour; + </p> + <p> + That Andrew hoped again to use his pow'r, + </p> + <p> + He was not plunged in sleep, but briskly flew, + </p> + <p> + His purpose with the charmer to pursue. + </p> + <p> + Said he, all other things aside I've laid, + </p> + <p> + This ear to finish, and to lend you aid. + </p> + <p> + And I, the dame replied, was on the eve, + </p> + <p> + To send and beg you not the job to leave; + </p> + <p> + Above stairs let us go:—away they ran, + </p> + <p> + And quickly recommenced as they began. + </p> + <p> + The work so oft was smoothed, that Alice showed + </p> + <p> + Some scruples lest the ear he had bestowed + </p> + <p> + Should do too much, and to the wily wight, + </p> + <p> + She said, so little you the labour slight, + </p> + <p> + 'Twere well if ears no more than two appear; + </p> + <p> + Of that, rejoined the other, never fear; + </p> + <p> + I've guarded thoroughly against defects, + </p> + <p> + Mistake like that shall ne'er your senses vex. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE ear howe'er was still in hand the same, + </p> + <p> + When from his journey home the husband came. + </p> + <p> + Saluted Alice, who with anxious look, + </p> + <p> + Exclaimed,—your work how finely you forsook, + </p> + <p> + And, but for neighbour Andrew's kindness here, + </p> + <p> + Our child would incomplete have been—an ear, + </p> + <p> + I could not let a thing remain like this, + </p> + <p> + And Andrew would not be to friends remiss, + </p> + <p> + But, worthy man, he left his thriving trade, + </p> + <p> + And for the babe a proper ear has made. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE husband, not conceiving how his wife, + </p> + <p> + Could be so weak and ignorant of life, + </p> + <p> + The circumstances made her fully tell, + </p> + <p> + Repeat them o'er and on each action dwell. + </p> + <p> + Enraged at length, a pistol by the bed + </p> + <p> + He seized and swore at once he'd shoot her dead. + </p> + <p> + The belle with tears replied, howe'er she'd swerved, + </p> + <p> + Such cruel treatment never she deserved. + </p> + <p> + Her innocence, and simple, gentle way, + </p> + <p> + At length appeared his frantick rage to lay. + </p> + <p> + What injury, continued she, is done? + </p> + <p> + The strictest scrutiny I would not shun; + </p> + <p> + Your goods and money, ev'ry thing is right; + </p> + <p> + And Andrew told me, nothing he would slight; + </p> + <p> + That you would find much more than you could want; + </p> + <p> + And this I hope to me you'll freely grant; + </p> + <p> + If falsehood I advance, my life I'll lose; + </p> + <p> + Your equity, I trust, will me excuse. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A LITTLE cooled, then William thus replied, + </p> + <p> + We'll say no more; you have been drawn aside; + </p> + <p> + What passed you fancied acting for the best, + </p> + <p> + And I'll consent to put the thing at rest; + </p> + <p> + To nothing good such altercations tend; + </p> + <p> + I've but a word: to that attention lend; + </p> + <p> + Contrive to-morrow that I here entrap + </p> + <p> + This fellow who has caused your sad mishap; + </p> + <p> + You'll utter not a word of what I've said; + </p> + <p> + Be secret or at once I'll strike you dead. + </p> + <p> + Adroitly you must act: for instance say; + </p> + <p> + I'm on a second journey gone away; + </p> + <p> + A message or a letter to him send, + </p> + <p> + Soliciting that he'll on you attend, + </p> + <p> + That something you have got to let him know;— + </p> + <p> + To come, no doubt, the rascal won't be slow; + </p> + <p> + Amuse him then with converse most absurd, + </p> + <p> + But of the EAR remember,—not a word; + </p> + <p> + That's finished now, and nothing can require; + </p> + <p> + You'll carefully perform what I desire. + </p> + <p> + Poor innocent! the point she nicely hit; + </p> + <p> + Fear oft gives simpletons a sort of wit. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE arch gallant arrived; the husband came + </p> + <p> + Ascended to the room where sat his dame; + </p> + <p> + Much noise he made, his coming to announce; + </p> + <p> + The lover, terrified, began to bounce; + </p> + <p> + Now here, now there, no shelter could he meet; + </p> + <p> + Between the bed and wall he put his feet, + </p> + <p> + And lay concealed, while William loudly knocked; + </p> + <p> + Fair Alice readily the door unlocked, + </p> + <p> + And, pointing with her hand, informed the spouse, + </p> + <p> + Where he might easily his rival rouse. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE husband ev'ry way was armed so well, + </p> + <p> + He four such men as Andrew could repel; + </p> + <p> + In quest of succour howsoe'er he went: + </p> + <p> + To kill him surely William never meant, + </p> + <p> + But only take an ear, or what the Turks, + </p> + <p> + Those savage beasts, cut off from Nature's works; + </p> + <p> + Which doubtless must be infinitely worse + </p> + <p> + Infernal practice and continual curse. + </p> + <p> + 'Twas this he whispered should be Andrew's doom, + </p> + <p> + When with his easy wife he left the room; + </p> + <p> + She nothing durst reply: the door he shut, + </p> + <p> + And our gallant 'gan presently to strut, + </p> + <p> + Around and round, believing all was right, + </p> + <p> + And William unacquainted with his plight. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20337m.jpg" alt="20337m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20337.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + THE latter having well the project weighed, + </p> + <p> + Now changed his plan, and other schemes surveyed; + </p> + <p> + Proposed within himself revenge to take, + </p> + <p> + With less parade:—less noise it then would make, + </p> + <p> + And better fruit the action would produce, + </p> + <p> + Than if he were apparently profuse. + </p> + <p> + Said he to Alice, go and seek his wife; + </p> + <p> + To her relate the whole that caused our strife; + </p> + <p> + Minutely all from first to last detail; + </p> + <p> + And then the better on her to prevail, + </p> + <p> + To hasten here, you'll hint that you have fears, + </p> + <p> + That Andrew risks the loss of—more than ears, + </p> + <p> + For I have punishment severe in view, + </p> + <p> + Which greatly she must wish I should not do; + </p> + <p> + But if an ear-maker, like this, is caught, + </p> + <p> + The worst of chastisement is always sought; + </p> + <p> + Such horrid things as scarcely can be said: + </p> + <p> + They make the hair to stand upon the head; + </p> + <p> + That he's upon the point of suff'ring straight, + </p> + <p> + And only for her presence things await; + </p> + <p> + That though she cannot all proceedings stay, + </p> + <p> + Perhaps she may some portion take away. + </p> + <p> + Go, bring her instantly, haste quickly, run; + </p> + <p> + And, if she comes, I'll pardon what's been done. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WITH joy to Andrew's house fair Alice went; + </p> + <p> + The wife to follow her appeared content; + </p> + <p> + Quite out of breath, alone she ran up stairs, + </p> + <p> + And, not perceiving him who shared her cares; + </p> + <p> + Believed he was imprisoned in a room; + </p> + <p> + And while with fear she trembled for his doom; + </p> + <p> + The master (having laid aside his arms) + </p> + <p> + Now came to compliment the lady's charms; + </p> + <p> + He gave the belle a chair, who looked most nice:— + </p> + <p> + Said he, ingratitude's the worst of vice; + </p> + <p> + To me your husband has been wondrous kind; + </p> + <p> + So many services has done I find, + </p> + <p> + That, ere you leave this house, I'd wish to make + </p> + <p> + A little return, and this you will partake. + </p> + <p> + When I was absent from my loving dear, + </p> + <p> + Obligingly he made her babe an ear. + </p> + <p> + The compliment of course I must admire; + </p> + <p> + Retaliation is what I desire, + </p> + <p> + And I've a thought:—your children all have got + </p> + <p> + The nose a little short, which is a blot; + </p> + <p> + A fault within the mould no doubt's the cause, + </p> + <p> + Which I can mend, and any other flaws. + </p> + <p> + The business now let's execute I pray, + </p> + <p> + On which the dame he took without delay, + </p> + <p> + And placed her near where Andrew hid his head, + </p> + <p> + Then 'gan to operate as he was led. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE lady patiently his process bore, + </p> + <p> + And blessed her stars that Andrew's risk was o'er + </p> + <p> + That she had thus the dire return received, + </p> + <p> + And saved the man for whom her bosom grieved. + </p> + <p> + So much emotion William seemed to feel, + </p> + <p> + No grace he gave, but all performed with zeal; + </p> + <p> + Retaliated ev'ry way so well, + </p> + <p> + He measure gave for measure:—ell for ell. + </p> + <p> + How true the adage, that revenge is sweet! + </p> + <p> + The plan he followed clearly was discrete; + </p> + <p> + For since he wished his honour to repair:— + </p> + <p> + Of any better way I'm not aware. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE whole without a murmur Andrew viewed, + </p> + <p> + And thanked kind Heav'n that nothing worse ensued; + </p> + <p> + One ear most readily he would have lost, + </p> + <p> + Could he be certain that would pay the cost. + </p> + <p> + He thought 'twould lucky be, could he get out, + </p> + <p> + For all considered, better 'twere no doubt, + </p> + <p> + Howe'er ridiculous the thing appears, + </p> + <p> + To have a pair of horns than lose his ears. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="River_Scamander" id="River_Scamander"></a>THE RIVER SCAMANDER + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20341m.jpg" alt="20341m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20341.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">I</span>'M now disposed to give a pretty tale; + </p> + <p> + Love laughs at what I've sworn and will prevail; + </p> + <p> + Men, gods, and all, his mighty influence know, + </p> + <p> + And full obedience to the urchin show. + </p> + <p> + In future when I celebrate his flame, + </p> + <p> + Expressions not so warm will be my aim; + </p> + <p> + I would not willingly abuses plant, + </p> + <p> + But rather let my writings spirit want. + </p> + <p> + If in these verses I around should twirl, + </p> + <p> + Some wily knave and easy simple girl, + </p> + <p> + 'Tis with intention in the breast to place; + </p> + <p> + On such occasions, dread of dire disgrace; + </p> + <p> + The mind to open, and the sex to set + </p> + <p> + Upon their guard 'gainst snares so often met. + </p> + <p> + Gross ignorance a thousand has misled, + </p> + <p> + For one that has been hurt by what I've said. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + I'VE read that once, an orator renowned + </p> + <p> + In Greece, where arts superior then were found, + </p> + <p> + By law's severe decree, compelled to quit + </p> + <p> + His country, and to banishment submit, + </p> + <p> + Resolved that he a season would employ, + </p> + <p> + In visiting the site of ancient Troy. + </p> + <p> + His comrade, Cymon, with him thither went, + </p> + <p> + To view those ruins, we so oft lament. + </p> + <p> + A hamlet had been raised from Ilion's wall, + </p> + <p> + Ennobled by misfortune and its fall; + </p> + <p> + Where now mere names are Priam and his court; + </p> + <p> + Of all devouring Time the prey and sport. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20345m.jpg" alt="20345m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20345.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + O TROY! for me thy very name has got + </p> + <p> + Superior charms:—in story fruitful spot; + </p> + <p> + Thy famed remains I ne'er can hope to view, + </p> + <p> + That gods by labour raised, and gods o'erthrew; + </p> + <p> + Those fields where daring acts of valour shone; + </p> + <p> + So many fights were lost:—so many won. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BUT to resume my thread, and not extend + </p> + <p> + Too much the subjects which our plan suspend; + </p> + <p> + This Cymon, who's the hero of our tale, + </p> + <p> + When walking near the banks that form the dale + </p> + <p> + Through which Scamander's waters freely flow, + </p> + <p> + Observed a youthful charmer thither go, + </p> + <p> + To breathe the cool refreshing breeze around; + </p> + <p> + That on its verdant borders oft she'd found. + </p> + <p> + Her veil was floating, and her artless dress, + </p> + <p> + A shepherdess seemed clearly to express. + </p> + <p> + Tall, elegantly formed, with beauteous mien, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry feature lovely to be seen, + </p> + <p> + Young Cymon felt emotion and surprise, + </p> + <p> + And thought 'twas Venus that had caught his eyes, + </p> + <p> + Who on the river's side her charms displayed, + </p> + <p> + Those wondrous treasures all perfection made. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A GROT was nigh, to which the simple fair, + </p> + <p> + Not dreaming ills, was anxious to repair; + </p> + <p> + The heat, some evil spirit, and the place, + </p> + <p> + Invited her the moment to embrace, + </p> + <p> + To bathe within the stream that near her ran; + </p> + <p> + And instantly her project she began. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE spark concealed himself; each charm admired; + </p> + <p> + Now this, now that, now t'other feature fired; + </p> + <p> + A hundred beauties caught his eager sight; + </p> + <p> + And while his bosom felt supreme delight, + </p> + <p> + He turned his thoughts advantages to take, + </p> + <p> + And of the maiden's error something make; + </p> + <p> + Assumed the character, and dress; and air; + </p> + <p> + That should a wat'ry deity declare; + </p> + <p> + Within the gliding flood his vestments dipt: + </p> + <p> + A crown of rushes on his head he slipt; + </p> + <p> + Aquatick herbs and plants around he twined: + </p> + <p> + Then Mercury intreated to be kind, + </p> + <p> + And Cupid too, the wily god of hearts; + </p> + <p> + How could the innocent resist these arts? <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT length a foot so fair the belle exposed, + </p> + <p> + E'en Galatea never such disclosed; + </p> + <p> + The stream, that glided by, received the prize; + </p> + <p> + Her lilies she beheld with downcast eyes, + </p> + <p> + And, half ashamed, herself surveyed at ease, + </p> + <p> + While round the zephyrs wantoned in the breeze. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN thus engaged, the lover near her drew; + </p> + <p> + At whose approach away the damsel flew, + </p> + <p> + And tried to hide within the rocky cell; + </p> + <p> + Cried Cymon, I beneath these waters dwell, + </p> + <p> + And o'er their course a sov'reign right maintain; + </p> + <p> + Be goddess of the flood, and with me reign; + </p> + <p> + Few rivers could with you like pow'rs divide; + </p> + <p> + My crystal's clear: in me you may confide; + </p> + <p> + My heart is pure; with flow'rs I'll deck the stream, + </p> + <p> + If worthy of yourself the flood you deem; + </p> + <p> + Too happy should this honour you bestow, + </p> + <p> + And with me, 'neath the current, freely go. + </p> + <p> + Your fair companions, ev'ry one I'll make + </p> + <p> + A nymph of fountains, hill, or grove, or lake; + </p> + <p> + My pow'r is great, extending far around + </p> + <p> + Where'er the eye can reach, 'tis fully found. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE eloquence he used, her fears and dread; + </p> + <p> + Lest she might give offence by what she said, + </p> + <p> + In spite of bashfulness that bliss alloys, + </p> + <p> + Soon all concluded with celestial joys. + </p> + <p> + 'Tis even said that Cupid lent supplies; + </p> + <p> + From superstition many things arise. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE spark withdrew, delighted by success; + </p> + <p> + Return said he:—we'll mutually caress; + </p> + <p> + But secret prove: let none our union learn; + </p> + <p> + Concealment is to me of high concern; + </p> + <p> + To make it publick would improper be, + </p> + <p> + Till on Olympus' mount the gods we see, + </p> + <p> + In council met, to whom I'll state the case; + </p> + <p> + On this the new-made goddess left the place, + </p> + <p> + In ev'ry thing contented as a dove, + </p> + <p> + And fully witnessed by the god of love. + </p> + <p> + Two months had passed, and not a person knew + </p> + <p> + Their frequent meetings, pleasure to pursue. + </p> + <p> + O mortals! is it true, as we are told, + </p> + <p> + That ev'ry bliss at last is rendered cold? + </p> + <p> + The sly gallant, though not a word he said, + </p> + <p> + The grot to visit now was rarely led. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AT length a wedding much attention caught; + </p> + <p> + The lads and lasses of the hamlet sought, + </p> + <p> + To see the couple pass: the belle perceived + </p> + <p> + The very man for whom her bosom heaved, + </p> + <p> + And loudly cried, behold Scamander's flood! + </p> + <p> + Which raised surprise; soon numbers round her stood, + </p> + <p> + Astonishment expressed, but still the fair, + </p> + <p> + Whate'er was asked, would nothing more declare, + </p> + <p> + Than, in the spacious, blue, ethereal sky, + </p> + <p> + Her marriage would be soon, they might rely. + </p> + <p> + A laugh prevailed; for what was to be done? + </p> + <p> + The god with hasty steps away had run, + </p> + <p> + And none with stones pursued his rapid flight: + </p> + <p> + The deity was quickly ought of sight. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WERE this to happen now, Scamander's stream + </p> + <p> + Would not so easily preserve esteem; + </p> + <p> + But crimes like these (whoever was abused), + </p> + <p> + In former days, were easily excused. + </p> + <p> + With time our maxims change, and what was then, + </p> + <p> + Though wrong at present, may prevail agen. + </p> + <p> + Scamander's spouse some raillery received; + </p> + <p> + But in the end she fully was relieved: + </p> + <p> + A lover e'en superior thought her charms, + </p> + <p> + (His taste was such) and took her to his arms. + </p> + <p> + The gods can nothing spoil! but should they cause + </p> + <p> + A belle to lose a portion of applause, + </p> + <p> + A handsome fortune give, and you'll behold, + </p> + <p> + That ev'ry thing can be repaired by gold. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Confidant_Without" id="Confidant_Without"></a>A CONFIDANT + WITHOUT KNOWING IT; + </h2> + <h2> + OR THE STRATAGEM + </h2> + +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20351m.jpg" alt="20351m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20351.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">N</span>O master sage, nor orator I know, + </p> + <p> + Who can success, like gentle Cupid show; + </p> + <p> + His ways and arguments are pleasing smiles, + </p> + <p> + Engaging looks, soft tears, and winning wiles. + </p> + <p> + Wars in his empire will at times arise, + </p> + <p> + And, in the field, his standard meet the eyes; + </p> + <p> + Now stealing secretly, with skilful lure. + </p> + <p> + He penetrates to hearts supposed secure, + </p> + <p> + O'erleaps the ramparts that protect around, + </p> + <p> + And citadels reduces, most renowned. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + I DARE engage, two fortresses besiege + </p> + <p> + Leave one to Mars, and t'other to this liege. + </p> + <p> + And though the god of war should numbers bring, + </p> + <p> + With all the arms that can his thunders fling, + </p> + <p> + Before the fort he'll vainly waste his time, + </p> + <p> + While Cupid, unattended, in shall climb, + </p> + <p> + Obtain possession perfectly at ease, + </p> + <p> + And grant conditions just as he shall please. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + I NOW propose to give a fav'rite tale:— + </p> + <p> + The god of Love was never known to fail, + </p> + <p> + In finding stratagems, as I have read, + </p> + <p> + And many have I seen most nicely spread. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE young Aminta was Gerontes' wife, + </p> + <p> + With whom she lived, it seems, a wretched life. + </p> + <p> + Far better she deserved than what she had, + </p> + <p> + For he was jealous, and his temper bad: + </p> + <p> + An aged hunks, while she was in the hour + </p> + <p> + When hearts, that never felt LOVE'S mighty pow'r, + </p> + <p> + Are presently by tender objects caught, + </p> + <p> + Which ne'er before had entered in the thought. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN first Aminta saw young Cleon's face, + </p> + <p> + A lad possessing all engaging grace, + </p> + <p> + Much prudence then she ev'ry way displayed, + </p> + <p> + E'en more perhaps than necessary made. + </p> + <p> + For though we may suppose the lovely fair, + </p> + <p> + Would ev'ry effort use to 'scape the snare, + </p> + <p> + Yet when the god of soft persuasion takes + </p> + <p> + The fatal moment, havock soon he makes, + </p> + <p> + In vain his duty, any thing opposed, + </p> + <p> + If once the tender sentiment's disclosed. + </p> + <p> + Aminta consolation had in view + </p> + <p> + 'Twas that alone the passion from her drew, + </p> + <p> + A meeting innocent, to vent her tears, + </p> + <p> + And, to a feeling friend, express her fears. + </p> + <p> + 'Tis represented thus I cannot doubt; + </p> + <p> + But sight of meat brings appetite about; + </p> + <p> + And if you would avoid the tempting bit, + </p> + <p> + 'Tis better far at table not to sit. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AMINTA hoped to render Cleon kind; + </p> + <p> + Poor innocent! as yet to dangers blind, + </p> + <p> + These conversations she was led to deem, + </p> + <p> + Mere friendly ways that raised sincere esteem; + </p> + <p> + And this alone she ardently desired, + </p> + <p> + Without supposing more would be required, + </p> + <p> + Or any thing improper be the case: + </p> + <p> + She'd rather die than suffer such disgrace. + </p> + <p> + 'Twas difficult the business to commence; + </p> + <p> + A letter 's often lost, or gives offence, + </p> + <p> + And many serious accidents arrive: + </p> + <p> + To have a confidant 'twere better strive; + </p> + <p> + But where could such a female friend be found? + </p> + <p> + Gerontes dreaded was by all around. + </p> + <p> + I've said already, Cupid will obtain, + </p> + <p> + One way or t'other, what he wants to gain; + </p> + <p> + And this will show the observation just + </p> + <p> + The maxim's such as you may always trust. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A FEMALE relative young Cleon had, + </p> + <p> + A peevish prude, who looked upon the lad, + </p> + <p> + As one she had a right to rule and scold; + </p> + <p> + Her name was Mistress Alice: sour and old. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ONE summer's day, Aminta to her said: + </p> + <p> + I cannot think how 'tis, your cousin's led, + </p> + <p> + (Though quite indifferent he is to me, + </p> + <p> + And doubtless such will ever prove to be) + </p> + <p> + With various fond attentions, to pretend, + </p> + <p> + He loves me—much beyond a common friend. + </p> + <p> + My window oft he passes day and night; + </p> + <p> + I cannot move a step, but he's in sight, + </p> + <p> + And in a moment at my heels appears; + </p> + <p> + Notes, letters full of soft expressions, dears, + </p> + <p> + To me are sent by one I will not name, + </p> + <p> + For known to you, she would be thought to blame: + </p> + <p> + Pray put an end to such a wild pursuit + </p> + <p> + It nothing can produce but wretched fruit; + </p> + <p> + My husband may take fire at things like these; + </p> + <p> + And as to Cleon.—me he'll never please; + </p> + <p> + I'll thank you to inform him what I say; + </p> + <p> + Such steps are useless: folly they betray. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + MUCH praise Aminta from the dame received; + </p> + <p> + Who promised that the conduct, which aggrieved; + </p> + <p> + To Cleon she would mention, as desired, + </p> + <p> + And reprimand him, as the fault required: + </p> + <p> + So well would scold him, that she might be sure, + </p> + <p> + From him in future she would be secure. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE foll'wing day our youth to Alice came; + </p> + <p> + To pay a visit solely was his aim; + </p> + <p> + She told him what Aminta had declared, + </p> + <p> + And, in her lecture, words by no means spared. + </p> + <p> + The lad, surprised, on oath the whole denied, + </p> + <p> + And vowed to gain her love, he never tried. + </p> + <p> + Old Alice called her cousin, imp of Hell; + </p> + <p> + Said she, in all that's wicked, you excel; + </p> + <p> + You will not all your base designs confess; + </p> + <p> + The oaths are false on which you lay such stress, + </p> + <p> + And punishment most richly you deserve; + </p> + <p> + But false or true, from this I will not swerve, + </p> + <p> + That you should recollect, Aminta 's chaste, + </p> + <p> + And never will submit to be disgraced; + </p> + <p> + Renounce her from this hour; no more pursue:— + </p> + <p> + That easily, said Cleon, I can do; + </p> + <p> + Away he went: the case considered o'er; + </p> + <p> + But still the myst'ry he could not explore. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THREE days had scarcely passed: Aminta came, + </p> + <p> + To pay a visit to our ancient dame; + </p> + <p> + Cried she I fear, you have not seen as yet, + </p> + <p> + This youth, who worse and worse appears to get. + </p> + <p> + Rage, Mistress Alice, instantly o'erspread, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry thing that's vile she of him said. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NO sooner had Aminta gone away, + </p> + <p> + But she for Cleon sent without delay. + </p> + <p> + He presently appeared; yet to detail + </p> + <p> + How Alice stormed, I certainly should fail; + </p> + <p> + Unless an iron tongue I could obtain: + </p> + <p> + All Hell was ransacked epithets to gain; + </p> + <p> + And Lucifer and Beelzebub were used: + </p> + <p> + No mortal ever was so much abused. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + QUITE terrified, poor lad, he scarcely knew; + </p> + <p> + Her fury was so great, what best to do; + </p> + <p> + If he allowed that he had acted wrong, + </p> + <p> + 'Twould wound his conscience and defile his tongue. + </p> + <p> + He home repaired, and turning in his mind + </p> + <p> + What he had heard, at length his thoughts inclined, + </p> + <p> + To fancy that Aminta was disposed, + </p> + <p> + To play some cunning trick, which, not disclosed, + </p> + <p> + Would operate to bring her wish about; + </p> + <p> + I see, said he, the scheme I should not doubt; + </p> + <p> + It surely is my duty kind to be: + </p> + <p> + Methinks I hear her freely say to me, + </p> + <p> + O Cleon! show affection, I am yours; + </p> + <p> + I love her too, for beauty that secures; + </p> + <p> + And while her seraph charms my bosom fire; + </p> + <p> + I equally the stratagem admire. + </p> + <p> + Most freely howsoe'er I will confess, + </p> + <p> + At first I was so dull, I could not guess + </p> + <p> + At what she aimed, but now the object's plain: + </p> + <p> + Aminta o'er my heart desires to reign. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS minute, if I durst, I'd thither go, + </p> + <p> + And, full of confidence, declare my woe, + </p> + <p> + The subtle flame that burns without controul; + </p> + <p> + What hurt to paint feelings of my soul? + </p> + <p> + From balance of accounts 'twill both exempt: + </p> + <p> + 'Tis better far to love than show contempt. + </p> + <p> + But should the husband find me in the house?— + </p> + <p> + Ne'er think of that, and try the hunks to chouse. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THEIR course had hardly run three other days, + </p> + <p> + When fair Aminta, studious still of ways + </p> + <p> + To have her wish, again to Alice came, + </p> + <p> + To give dear Cleon notice of her flame. + </p> + <p> + My home, cried she, 'tis requisite I leave: + </p> + <p> + To ruin me, your cousin, I perceive, + </p> + <p> + Is still resolved, for presents now he sends; + </p> + <p> + But he mistakes, and blindly wealth expends; + </p> + <p> + I'm clearly not the woman he suspects: + </p> + <p> + See here, what jewels rare to please the sex! + </p> + <p> + Nice rubies, diamonds too, but what is more, + </p> + <p> + My portrait I have found among the store, + </p> + <p> + Which must have been from memory designed, + </p> + <p> + Since only with my husband that you'll find. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN I arose, this person known to you, + </p> + <p> + Whose name I must conceal (to honour true), + </p> + <p> + Arrived and brought me what I just have shown; + </p> + <p> + The whole should at your cousin's head be thrown; + </p> + <p> + And were he present:—but I'll curb my rage; + </p> + <p> + Allow me to proceed, and you engage + </p> + <p> + To hear the rest:—he word has also sent, + </p> + <p> + That as to-day he knew my husband went + </p> + <p> + On business to his cottage in the wood, + </p> + <p> + Where he would sleep the night, he understood, + </p> + <p> + No sooner should the servants be in bed, + </p> + <p> + And Morpheus' robe be o'er their senses spread, + </p> + <p> + But to my dressing room he would repair:— + </p> + <p> + What can he hope, such project to declare? + </p> + <p> + A meeting place indeed!—he must be mad; + </p> + <p> + Were I not fearful 'twould affliction add + </p> + <p> + To my old husband, I would set a watch, + </p> + <p> + Who, at the entrance, should the villain catch; + </p> + <p> + Or put him instantly to shame and flight; + </p> + <p> + This said, she presently was out of sight. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AN hour had passed when Cleon came anew; + </p> + <p> + The jewels at him in a moment flew; + </p> + <p> + And scarcely Mistress Alice could refrain, + </p> + <p> + From wreaking further vengeance on the swain. + </p> + <p> + Is this your plan? cried she; but what is worse, + </p> + <p> + I find you still desire a greater curse; + </p> + <p> + And then she told him all Aminta said, + </p> + <p> + When last to visit her the fair was led. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HIMSELF most fully warned the youth now thought; + </p> + <p> + I loved, cried he, 'tis true; but that is naught, + </p> + <p> + Since nothing from the belle I must expect: + </p> + <p> + In future her completely I'll neglect. + </p> + <p> + That is the line, said Alice, you should take; + </p> + <p> + The lad howe'er was fully now awake, + </p> + <p> + And thoroughly resolved to seek the dame, + </p> + <p> + Whose cunning wiles had set him in a flame. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE midnight hour the clock no sooner told; + </p> + <p> + Than Cleon ran the myst'ry to unfold, + </p> + <p> + And to the spot repaired, which he supposed, + </p> + <p> + Aminta meant, from what had been disclosed; + </p> + <p> + The place was well described, and there he found; + </p> + <p> + Awaiting at the door, this belle renowned, + </p> + <p> + Without attendants: sleep their eyes o'erspread: + </p> + <p> + Behind thick clouds the very stars had fled: + </p> + <p> + As all had been expected, in he went, + </p> + <p> + Most thoroughly they both appeared content; + </p> + <p> + Few words were used: in haste the pair withdrew, + </p> + <p> + Where ev'ry wish at ease they might pursue. + </p> + <p> + The smart gallant at once her beauty praised; + </p> + <p> + His admiration presently was raised; + </p> + <p> + Sweet kindness followed; charms were oft admired; + </p> + <p> + And all was managed as their hearts desired. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SAID youthful Cleon, now you'll tell me why + </p> + <p> + This stratagem you were induced to try? + </p> + <p> + For such before in love was never seen; + </p> + <p> + 'Tis excellent, and worthy Beauty's queen. + </p> + <p> + A lovely blush o'erspread Aminta's face, + </p> + <p> + And gave her lily-cheeks superior grace. + </p> + <p> + He praised her person, artifice, and wit, + </p> + <p> + And did whate'er the moments would admit. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Clyster" id="Clyster"></a>THE CLYSTER + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20361m.jpg" alt="20361m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20361.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">I</span>F truth give pleasure, surely we should try; + </p> + <p> + To found our tales on what we can rely; + </p> + <p> + Th' experiment repeatedly I've made, + </p> + <p> + And seen how much realities persuade: + </p> + <p> + They draw attention: confidence awake; + </p> + <p> + Fictitious names however we should take, + </p> + <p> + And then the rest detail without disguise: + </p> + <p> + 'Tis thus I mean to manage my supplies. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IT happened then near Mans, a Normand town, + </p> + <p> + For sapient people always of renown, + </p> + <p> + A maid not long ago a lover had + </p> + <p> + Brisk, pleasing, ev'ry way a handsome lad; + </p> + <p> + The down as yet was scarcely on his chin; + </p> + <p> + The girl was such as many wished to win: + </p> + <p> + Had charms and fortune, all that was desired, + </p> + <p> + And by the Mansian sparks was much admired; + </p> + <p> + Around they swarmed, but vain was all their art + </p> + <p> + Too much our youth possessed the damsel's heart. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE parents, in their wisdom, meant the fair + </p> + <p> + Should marry one who was a wealthy heir; + </p> + <p> + But she contrived to manage matters well; + </p> + <p> + In spite of ev'ry thing which might repel, + </p> + <p> + (I know not how) at length he had access; + </p> + <p> + Though whether through indulgence or address, + </p> + <p> + It matters not: perhaps his noble blood + </p> + <p> + Might work a change when fully understood: + </p> + <p> + The LUCKY, ev'ry thing contrives to please; + </p> + <p> + The rest can nothing but misfortune seize. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE lover had success; the parents thought + </p> + <p> + His merit such as prudence would have sought; + </p> + <p> + What more to wish?—the miser's hoarded store: + </p> + <p> + The golden age's wealth is now no more, + </p> + <p> + A silly shadow, phantom of the brain; + </p> + <p> + O happy time! I see indeed with pain, + </p> + <p> + Thou wilt return:—in MAINE thou shalt arise; + </p> + <p> + Thy innocence, we fondly may surmise, + </p> + <p> + Had seconded our lover's ardent flame, + </p> + <p> + And hastened his possession of the dame. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE slowness usually in parents found, + </p> + <p> + Induced the girl, whose heart by LOVE was bound; + </p> + <p> + To celebrate the Hymeneal scene, + </p> + <p> + As in the statutes of Cythera's queen. + </p> + <p> + Our legendary writers this define + </p> + <p> + A present contract, where they nothing sign; + </p> + <p> + The thing is common;—marriage made in haste: + </p> + <p> + LOVE'S perparation: Hymen's bit for taste. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NOT much examination Cupid made, + </p> + <p> + As parent, lawyer, priest, he lent his aid, + </p> + <p> + And soon concluded matters as desired; + </p> + <p> + The Mansian wisdom no ways was required. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR spark was satisfied, and with his belle, + </p> + <p> + Passed nights so happy, nothing could excel; + </p> + <p> + 'Twere easy to explain;—the double keys, + </p> + <p> + And gifts designed the chambermaid to please, + </p> + <p> + Made all secure, and ev'ry joy abound; + </p> + <p> + The soft delights with secrecy were crowned. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IT happened that our fair one evening said, + </p> + <p> + To her who of each infant step had led, + </p> + <p> + But of the present secret nothing knew:— + </p> + <p> + I feel unwell; pray tell me what to do. + </p> + <p> + The other answered, you my dear must take + </p> + <p> + A remedy that easily I'll make, + </p> + <p> + A clyster you shall have to-morrow morn: + </p> + <p> + By me most willingly it will be borne. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN midnight came the sly gallant appeared, + </p> + <p> + Unluckily no doubt, but he revered + </p> + <p> + The moments that so pleasantly were passed, + </p> + <p> + Which always seemed, he thought, to glide too fast; + </p> + <p> + Relief he sought, for ev'ry one below + </p> + <p> + Is destined torments more or less to know. + </p> + <p> + He not a word was told of things designed, + </p> + <p> + And just as our gallant to sleep inclined, + </p> + <p> + As oft's the case at length with lovers true, + </p> + <p> + Quite open bright Aurora's portals flew, + </p> + <p> + And with a smile the aged dame arrived; + </p> + <p> + The apparatus properly contrived, + </p> + <p> + Was in her hand, she hastened to the bed, + </p> + <p> + And took the side that to the stripling led. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + OUR lady fair was instantly confused, + </p> + <p> + Or she precaution properly had used, + </p> + <p> + 'Twas easy to have kept a steady face, + </p> + <p> + And 'neath the clothes the other's head to place. + </p> + <p> + Pass presently beyond the hidden swain, + </p> + <p> + And t'other side with rapid motion gain, + </p> + <p> + A thing quite natural, we should suppose; + </p> + <p> + But fears o'erpow'red; the frightened damsel chose + </p> + <p> + To hide herself, then whispered her gallant, + </p> + <p> + What mighty terrors made her bosom pant. + </p> + <p> + The youth was sage, and coolly undertook + </p> + <p> + To offer for her:—t'other 'gan to look, + </p> + <p> + With spectacles on nose: soon all went right; + </p> + <p> + Adieu, she cried, and then withdrew from sight. + </p> + <p> + Heav'n guard her steps, and all conduct away, + </p> + <p> + Whose presence secret friendships would betray: <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SHOULD this be thought a silly, idle tale; + </p> + <p> + (And that opinion may perhaps prevail) + </p> + <p> + To censure me, enough will surely try, + </p> + <p> + For criticks are severe, and these will cry, + </p> + <p> + Your lady like a simpleton escaped; + </p> + <p> + Her character you better might have shaped; + </p> + <p> + Which makes us doubt the truth of what is told: + </p> + <p> + Naught in your prologue like it we behold. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + 'TWERE sueless to reply: 'twould endless prove: + </p> + <p> + No arguments such censurers could move; + </p> + <p> + On men like these, devoid of sense or taste, + </p> + <p> + In vain might Cicero his rhet'rick waste. + </p> + <p> + Sufficient 'tis for me, that what is here, + </p> + <p> + I got from those who ev'ry-where appear + </p> + <p> + The friends of truth:—let others say the same; + </p> + <p> + What more would they expect should be my aim? <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Indiscreet_Confession" id="Indiscreet_Confession"></a>THE + INDISCREET CONFESSIONS + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20367m.jpg" alt="20367m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20367.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">F</span>AMED Paris ne'er within its walls had got, + </p> + <p> + Such magick charms as were Aminta's lot, + </p> + <p> + Youth, beauty, temper, fortune, she possessed, + </p> + <p> + And all that should a husband render blessed, + </p> + <p> + The mother still retained her 'neath the wing; + </p> + <p> + Her father's riches well might lovers bring; + </p> + <p> + Whate'er his daughter wished, he would provide, + </p> + <p> + Amusements, jewels, dress, and much beside. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BLITHE Damon for her having felt the dart, + </p> + <p> + The belle received the offer of his heart; + </p> + <p> + So well he managed and expressed his flame. + </p> + <p> + That soon her lord and master he became, + </p> + <p> + By Hymen's right divine, you may conceive, + </p> + <p> + And nothing short of it you should believe. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A YEAR had passed, and still our charming pair, + </p> + <p> + Were always pleased, and blisses seemed to share; + </p> + <p> + (The honeymoon appeared but just began) + </p> + <p> + And hopes were entertained to have a son, + </p> + <p> + When Damon on the subject chanced to touch: + </p> + <p> + In truth, said he, my soul is troubled much; + </p> + <p> + There is a fact, my dear, to you I'll tell: + </p> + <p> + I wish sincerely (since I love so well) + </p> + <p> + That for another, I had never known + </p> + <p> + Such fond affection as to you I've shown; + </p> + <p> + And none but you had entered in my breast, + </p> + <p> + So worthy ev'ry way to be caressed. + </p> + <p> + I have howe'er experienced other flame; + </p> + <p> + The fault's acknowledged: I confess my shame. + </p> + <p> + 'Twas in a wood; the nymph was young and nice, + </p> + <p> + And Cupid only near to give advice; + </p> + <p> + So well he managed:—or so ill, you'll say; + </p> + <p> + A little girl I've living at this day. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20371m.jpg" alt="20371m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20371.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <p> + WHAT, cried Aminta, now to you I'll state; + </p> + <p> + What happened once to be your spouse's fate; + </p> + <p> + I was at home alone, to say the truth, + </p> + <p> + When thither came by chance a sprightly youth. + </p> + <p> + The lad was handsome, with engaging mien; + </p> + <p> + I felt his worth:—my nature is serene; + </p> + <p> + In short so many things were our employ, + </p> + <p> + I've still upon my hands a little boy. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THESE words no sooner had escaped the belle, + </p> + <p> + Than Damon into jealous torments fell; + </p> + <p> + With rage he left the room; and on his way, + </p> + <p> + A large pack-saddle near his footsteps lay, + </p> + <p> + Which on his back he put, then cried aloud, + </p> + <p> + I'm saddled! see; round quickly came a crowd; + </p> + <p> + The father, mother, all the servants ran; + </p> + <p> + The neighbours too; the husband then began + </p> + <p> + To state the circumstance that gave him pain; + </p> + <p> + And fully all the folly to explain. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE reader must not fail to keep in mind; + </p> + <p> + Aminta's parents were both rich and kind, + </p> + <p> + And having only her to be their heir, + </p> + <p> + The aged couple let the youthful pair, + </p> + <p> + With all their train, within the house reside, + </p> + <p> + And tranquilly the moments seemed to glide. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THU mother fondly to her daughter flew; + </p> + <p> + The father followed, keeping her in view; + </p> + <p> + The dame went in, but he remained without: + </p> + <p> + To listen he designed beyond a doubt; + </p> + <p> + The door was on the jar; the sage drew near; + </p> + <p> + In short, to all they said, he lent an ear; + </p> + <p> + The lady thus he heard reproach her child: + </p> + <p> + You're clearly wrong; most silly may be styled; + </p> + <p> + I've many simpletons and ninnies seen; + </p> + <p> + But such as you before there ne'er has been: + </p> + <p> + Who'd have believed you indiscreet like this? + </p> + <p> + Who forced you to reveal what was amiss? + </p> + <p> + What obligation to divulge the fact? + </p> + <p> + More girls than one have failed to be exact; + </p> + <p> + The Devil's crafty; folks are wicked too; + </p> + <p> + But that is no excuse, however true; + </p> + <p> + In convents all of us should be immured, + </p> + <p> + Till perfectly by Hymen's bands secured. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + E'EN I who speak, alas! have troubles met; + </p> + <p> + Within my bosom oft I feel regret; + </p> + <p> + Three children ere my marriage I had got; + </p> + <p> + Have I your father told this secret blot? + </p> + <p> + Have we together been less happy found? + </p> + <p> + The list'ner had no sooner heard the sound, + </p> + <p> + But like a man distracted off he flew; + </p> + <p> + The saddle's girth, which hazard near him threw; + </p> + <p> + He took and fastened tightly 'bout his waist, + </p> + <p> + Then bawled around and round with anxious haste; + </p> + <p> + I'm girth'd! d'ye see, completely taken in; + </p> + <p> + The people stared, an 'gan to laugh and grin. + </p> + <p> + Though each was conscious, if the truth were known; + </p> + <p> + The ridicule in turn might be his own. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BOTH husbands madly ran from cross to square, + </p> + <p> + And with their foolish clamours rent the air; + </p> + <p> + I'm saddled, hooted one; I'm girth'd, said this; + </p> + <p> + The latter some perhaps will doubt, and hiss; + </p> + <p> + Such things however should not be disbelieved + </p> + <p> + For instance, recollect (what's well received), + </p> + <p> + When Roland learned the pleasures and the charms; + </p> + <p> + His rival, in the grot, had in his arms, + </p> + <p> + With fist he gave his horse so hard a blow, + </p> + <p> + It sunk at once to realms of poignant woe. + </p> + <p> + Might he not, training, round the hapless beast, + </p> + <p> + From weight of saddle have its back released, + </p> + <p> + And putting it upon his own, have cried, + </p> + <p> + I'm saddled, I'm girth'd, and much beside; + </p> + <p> + (No matter this or that, since each is good,) + </p> + <p> + Which Echo would repeat from hill to wood? + </p> + <p> + You see that truth may be discovered here; + </p> + <p> + That's not enough; its object should appear; + </p> + <p> + And that I'll show as further we proceed; + </p> + <p> + Your full attention I of course shall need. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE happy Damon clearly seems to me, + </p> + <p> + As poor a thing as any we shall see; + </p> + <p> + His confidence would soon have spoiled the whole, + </p> + <p> + To leave a belle like this without control! + </p> + <p> + Her simplicity I much admire:— + </p> + <p> + Confess herself to spouse, as if a friar! + </p> + <p> + What silliness! imprudence is a word, + </p> + <p> + Which here to use would truly be absurd. + </p> + <p> + To my discourse two heads alone remain; + </p> + <p> + The marriage vow you always should maintain; + </p> + <p> + Its faith the pair should ever keep in view: + </p> + <p> + The path of honour steadily pursue. + </p> + <p> + If some mishap howe'er should chance to glide; + </p> + <p> + And make you limp on one or t'other side, + </p> + <p> + Endeavour, of the fault, to make the best, + </p> + <p> + And keep the secret locked within your breast; + </p> + <p> + Your own consideration never lose; + </p> + <p> + Untruth 'tis pardonable then to use. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + No doubt my pages nice advice supply; + </p> + <p> + Is't what I've followed?—No, you may rely! <br /><br /><br /><br /> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Contract" id="Contract"></a>THE CONTRACT + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20377m.jpg" alt="20377m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20377.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">T</span>HE husband's dire mishap, and silly maid, + </p> + <p> + In ev'ry age, have proved the fable's aid; + </p> + <p> + The fertile subject never will be dry: + </p> + <p> + 'Tis inexhaustible, you may rely. + </p> + <p> + No man's exempt from evils such as these:— + </p> + <p> + Who thinks himself secure, but little sees. + </p> + <p> + One laughs at sly intrigues who, ere 'tis long, + </p> + <p> + May, in his turn, be sneered at by the throng: + </p> + <p> + With such vicissitudes, to be cast down, + </p> + <p> + Appears rank nonsense worthy Folly's crown. + </p> + <p> + He, whose adventures I'm about to write, + </p> + <p> + In his mischances,—found what gave delight. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + A CERTAIN Citizen, with fortune large, + </p> + <p> + When settled with a handsome wife in charge, + </p> + <p> + Not long attended for the marriage fruit: + </p> + <p> + The lady soon put matters 'yond dispute; + </p> + <p> + Produced a girl at first, and then a boy, + </p> + <p> + To fill th' expecting parent's breast with joy. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE son, when grown of size, a tutor had, + </p> + <p> + No pedant rude, with Greek and Latin mad, + </p> + <p> + But young and smart, a master too of arts, + </p> + <p> + Particularly learned in what imparts, + </p> + <p> + The gentle flame, the pleasing poignant pang, + </p> + <p> + That Ovid formerly so sweetly sang. + </p> + <p> + Some knowledge of good company he'd got; + </p> + <p> + A charming voice and manner were his lot; + </p> + <p> + And if we may disclose the mystick truth, + </p> + <p> + 'Twas Cupid who preceptor made the youth. + </p> + <p> + He with the brother solely took a place, + </p> + <p> + That better he the sister's charms might trace; + </p> + <p> + And under this disguise he fully gained + </p> + <p> + What he desired, so well his part he feigned: + </p> + <p> + An able master, or a lover true, + </p> + <p> + To teach or sigh, whichever was in view, + </p> + <p> + So thoroughly he could attention get, + </p> + <p> + Success alike in ev'ry thing he met. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IN little time the boy could construe well + </p> + <p> + The odes of Horace:—Virgil's fable tell; + </p> + <p> + And she whose beauty caught the tutor's eyes, + </p> + <p> + A perfect mistress got of heaving sighs. + </p> + <p> + So oft she practised what the master taught, + </p> + <p> + Her stomach feeble grew, whate'er was sought; + </p> + <p> + And strange suspicions of the cause arose, + </p> + <p> + Which Time at length was driven to disclose. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + MOST terribly the father raged and swore; + </p> + <p> + Our learned master, frightened, left the door, + </p> + <p> + The lady wished to take the youth for life; + </p> + <p> + The spark desired to make the girl his wife; + </p> + <p> + Both had the Hymeneal knot in view, + </p> + <p> + And mutual soft affection fondly knew. + </p> + <p> + At present love is little more than name: + </p> + <p> + In matrimony, gold's the only aim. + </p> + <p> + The belle was rich, while he had nothing got; + </p> + <p> + For him 'twas great:—for her a narrow lot. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + O DIRE corruption, age of wretched ways! + </p> + <p> + What strange caprice such management displays! + </p> + <p> + Shall we permit this fatal pow'r to reign? + </p> + <p> + Base int'rest's impulse: hideous modern stain; + </p> + <p> + The curse of ev'ry tender soft delight, + </p> + <p> + That charms the soul and fascinates the sight. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + BUT truce to moral; let's our tale resume; + </p> + <p> + The daughter scared; the father in a fume; + </p> + <p> + What could be done the evil to repair, + </p> + <p> + And hide the sad misfortune of the fair? + </p> + <p> + What method seek?—They married her in haste; + </p> + <p> + But not to him who had the belle debased, + </p> + <p> + For reasons I've sufficiently detailed; + </p> + <p> + To gain her hand a certain wight prevailed, + </p> + <p> + Who store of riches relished far above + </p> + <p> + The charms of beauty, warmed with fondest love. + </p> + <p> + Save this the man might well enough be thought: + </p> + <p> + In family and wealth just what was sought; + </p> + <p> + But whether fool or not, I cannot trace, + </p> + <p> + Since he was unacquainted with the case; + </p> + <p> + And if he'd known it, was the bargain bad? + </p> + <p> + Full twenty thousand pounds he with her had + </p> + <p> + A sprightly youthful wife to ease his care, + </p> + <p> + And with him ev'ry luxury to share. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HOW many tempted by the golden ore, + </p> + <p> + Have taken wives whose slips they know before; + </p> + <p> + And this good man the lady chaste believed, + </p> + <p> + So truly well she managed and deceived. + </p> + <p> + But when four months had passed, the fair-one showed. + </p> + <p> + How very much she to her lessons owed; + </p> + <p> + A little girl arrived: the husband stared + </p> + <p> + Cried he, what father of a child declared! + </p> + <p> + The time's too short: four months! I'm taken in! + </p> + <p> + A family should not so soon begin. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + AWAY he to the lady's father flew, + </p> + <p> + And of his shame a horrid picture drew; + </p> + <p> + Proposed to be divorced: much rage disclosed; + </p> + <p> + The parent smiled and said, pray be composed; + </p> + <p> + Speak not so loud: we may be overheard, + </p> + <p> + And privacy is much to be preferred. + </p> + <p> + A son-in-law, like you, I once appeared, + </p> + <p> + And similar misfortune justly feared; + </p> + <p> + Complaint I made, and mentioned a divorce; + </p> + <p> + Of heat and rage the ordinary course. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE father of my wife, who's now no more, + </p> + <p> + (Heav'n guard his soul, the loss I oft deplore,) + </p> + <p> + A prudent honest man as any round, + </p> + <p> + To calm my mind, a nice specifick found; + </p> + <p> + The pill was rather bitter, I admit; + </p> + <p> + But gilding made it for the stomach fit, + </p> + <p> + Which he knew how to manage very well: + </p> + <p> + No doctor in it him could e'er excel; + </p> + <p> + To satisfy my scruples he displayed + </p> + <p> + A CONTRACT (duly stamped and ably made), + </p> + <p> + Four thousand to secure, which he had got, + </p> + <p> + On similar occasion for a blot; + </p> + <p> + His lady's father gave it to efface + </p> + <p> + Domestick diff'rences and like disgrace: + </p> + <p> + With this my spouse's fortune he increased; + </p> + <p> + And instantly my dire complaining ceased. + </p> + <p> + From family to family the deed + </p> + <p> + Should pass, 'twill often prove a useful meed; + </p> + <p> + I kept it for the purpose:—do the same + </p> + <p> + Your daughter, married, may have equal blame. + </p> + <p> + On this the son-in-law the bond received, + </p> + <p> + And, with a bow, departed much relieved. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + MAY Heav'n preserve from trouble those who find, + </p> + <p> + At cheaper rate, to be consoled inclined. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Quid_Pro_Quo" id="Quid_Pro_Quo"></a>THE QUID PRO QUO; + </h2> + <h2> + OR THE MISTAKES + </h2> + +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20385m.jpg" alt="20385m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20385.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">D</span>AME FORTUNE often loves a laugh to raise, + </p> + <p> + And, playing off her tricks and roguish ways, + </p> + <p> + Instead of giving us what we desire, + </p> + <p> + Mere quid pro quo permits us to acquire. + </p> + <p> + I've found her gambols such from first to last, + </p> + <p> + And judge the future by experience past. + </p> + <p> + Fair Cloris and myself felt mutual flame; + </p> + <p> + And, when a year had run, the sprightly dame + </p> + <p> + Prepared to grant me, if I may be plain, + </p> + <p> + Some slight concessions that would ease my pain. + </p> + <p> + This was her aim; but whatsoe'er in view, + </p> + <p> + 'Tis opportunity we should pursue; + </p> + <p> + The lover, who's discreet, will moments seize; + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry effort then will tend to please. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + ONE eve I went this charming fair to see; + </p> + <p> + The husband happened (luckily for me) + </p> + <p> + To be abroad; but just as it was night + </p> + <p> + The master came, not doubting all was right; + </p> + <p> + No Cloris howsoe'er was in the way; + </p> + <p> + A servant girl, of disposition gay, + </p> + <p> + Well known to me, with pretty smiling face, + </p> + <p> + 'Tis said, was led to take her lady's place. + </p> + <p> + The mistress' loss for once was thus repaid; + </p> + <p> + The barter mutual:—wife against the maid. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WITH many tales like this the books abound; + </p> + <p> + But able hands are necessary found, + </p> + <p> + To place the incidents, arrange the whole, + </p> + <p> + That nothing may be forced nor feel control. + </p> + <p> + The urchin blind, who sees enough to lay + </p> + <p> + His num'rous snares, such tricks will often play. + </p> + <p> + The CRADLE in Boccace excels the most, + </p> + <p> + As to myself I do not mean to boast, + </p> + <p> + But fear, a thousand places, spite of toil, + </p> + <p> + By him made excellent, my labours spoil. + </p> + <p> + 'Tis time howe'er with preface to have done, + </p> + <p> + And show, by some new turn, or piece of fun, + </p> + <p> + (While easy numbers from my pencil flow,) + </p> + <p> + Of Fortune and of Love the quid pro quo. + </p> + <p> + In proof, we'll state what happened at Marseilles: + </p> + <p> + The story is so true, no doubt prevails. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THERE Clidamant, whose proper name my verse, + </p> + <p> + Prom high respect, refuses to rehearse, + </p> + <p> + Lived much at ease: not one a wife had got, + </p> + <p> + Throughout the realm, who was so nice a lot, + </p> + <p> + Her virtues, temper, and seraphick charms, + </p> + <p> + Should have secured the husband to her arms; + </p> + <p> + But he was not to constancy inclined; + </p> + <p> + The devil's crafty; snares has often twined + </p> + <p> + Around and round, with ev'ry subtle art, + </p> + <p> + When love of novelty he would impart. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE lady had a maid, whose form and size, + </p> + <p> + Height, easy manners, action, lips, and eyes, + </p> + <p> + Were thought to be so very like her own, + </p> + <p> + That one from t'other scarcely could be known; + </p> + <p> + The mistress was the prettiest of the two; + </p> + <p> + But, in a mask where much escapes the view, + </p> + <p> + 'Twas very difficult a choice to make, + </p> + <p> + And feel no doubts which better 'twere to take. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE Marseillesian husband, rather gay, + </p> + <p> + With mistress Alice was disposed to play; + </p> + <p> + (For such was called the maid we just have named;) + </p> + <p> + To show coquettish airs the latter aimed, + </p> + <p> + And met his wishes with reproof severe; + </p> + <p> + But to his plan the lover would adhere, + </p> + <p> + And promised her at length a pretty sum: + </p> + <p> + A hundred crowns, if to his room she'd come. + </p> + <p> + To pay the girl with kindness such as this, + </p> + <p> + In my opinion, was not much amiss. + </p> + <p> + At that rate what should be the mistress' price? + </p> + <p> + Perhaps still less: she might not be so nice. + </p> + <p> + But I mistake; the lady was so coy, + </p> + <p> + No spark, whatever art he could employ, + </p> + <p> + How cleverly soe'er he laid the snare, + </p> + <p> + Would have succeeded, spite of ev'ry care. + </p> + <p> + Nor presents nor attentions would have swayed; + </p> + <p> + Should I have mentioned presents as an aid? + </p> + <p> + Alas! no longer these are days of old! + </p> + <p> + By Love both nymph and shepherdess are sold; + </p> + <p> + He sets the price of many beauties rare; + </p> + <p> + This was a god;—now nothing but a mayor. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + O ALTERED times! O customs how depraved! + </p> + <p> + At first fair Alice frowardly behaved; + </p> + <p> + But in the sequel 'gan to change her way, + </p> + <p> + And said, her mistress, as the foll'wing day, + </p> + <p> + A certain remedy to take designed; + </p> + <p> + That, in the morning then, if so inclined, + </p> + <p> + They could at leisure in the cavern meet;— + </p> + <p> + The plan was pleasing: all appeared discreet. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE servant, having to her mistress said, + </p> + <p> + What projects were in view: what nets were spread; + </p> + <p> + The females, 'tween themselves, a plot contrived, + </p> + <p> + Of Quid pro quo, against the hour arrived. + </p> + <p> + The husband of the trick was ne'er aware, + </p> + <p> + So much the mistress had her servant's air; + </p> + <p> + But if he had, what then? no harm of course; + </p> + <p> + She might have lectured him with double force. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + NEXT day but one, gay Clidamant, whose joy + </p> + <p> + Appeared so great, 'twas free from all alloy, + </p> + <p> + By hazard met a friend, to whom he told + </p> + <p> + (Most indiscreetly) what to him was sold; + </p> + <p> + How Cupid favoured what he most required, + </p> + <p> + And freely granted all he had desired. + </p> + <p> + Though large the blessing, yet he grudged the cost; + </p> + <p> + The sum gave pain: a hundred crowns were lost! + </p> + <p> + The friend proposed they should at once decide, + </p> + <p> + The charge and pleasure 'tween them to divide. + </p> + <p> + Our husband thought his purse not over strong, + </p> + <p> + That saving fifty crowns would not be wrong. + </p> + <p> + But then, on t'other hand, to lend the fair, + </p> + <p> + In ev'ry view had got an awkward air; + </p> + <p> + Would she, as was proposed, consent to two? + </p> + <p> + To keep things secret would their lips be true? + </p> + <p> + Or was it fair to sacrifice her charms, + </p> + <p> + And lay her open thus to dire alarms? <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE friend this difficulty soon removed, + </p> + <p> + And represented that the cavern proved + </p> + <p> + So very dark, the girl would be deceived; + </p> + <p> + With one more shrewd the trick might be achieved. + </p> + <p> + Sufficient howsoever it would be, + </p> + <p> + If they by turns, and silent, could agree + </p> + <p> + To meet the belle, and leave to Love the rest, + </p> + <p> + From whom they hoped assistance if distressed. + </p> + <p> + Such silence to observe no hurt could do, + </p> + <p> + And Alice would suppose, a prudent view + </p> + <p> + Retained the tongue, since walls have often ears, + </p> + <p> + And, being mum, expressive was of fears. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + WHEN thus the two gallants their plan had laid, + </p> + <p> + And ev'ry promised pleasure fully weighed, + </p> + <p> + They to the husband's mansion made their way, + </p> + <p> + Where yet the wife between the bed-clothes lay. + </p> + <p> + The servant girl was near her mistress found; + </p> + <p> + Her dress was plain: no finery around; + </p> + <p> + In short, 'twas such that, when the moment came; + </p> + <p> + To fail the meeting could not be her aim. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE friends disputed which the lead should take, + </p> + <p> + And strong pretentions both appeared to make; + </p> + <p> + The husband, honours home would not allow: + </p> + <p> + Such compliments were out of fashion now. + </p> + <p> + To settle this, at length three dice they took; + </p> + <p> + The friend was highest placed in Fortune's book. + </p> + <p> + The both together to the cavern flew, + </p> + <p> + And for the servant soon impatient grew; + </p> + <p> + But Alice never came, and in her room + </p> + <p> + The mistress, softly treading 'mid the gloom, + </p> + <p> + The necessary signal gently gave, + </p> + <p> + On which she entered presently the cave, + </p> + <p> + And this so suddenly, no time was found + </p> + <p> + To make remarks on change or errors round, + </p> + <p> + Or any diff'rence 'tween the friend and spouse; + </p> + <p> + In short, before suspicions 'gan to rouse, + </p> + <p> + Or alteration lent the senses aid:— + </p> + <p> + To LOVE, a sacrifice was fully made. + </p> + <p> + The lucky wight more pleasure would have felt, + </p> + <p> + If sensible he'd been with whom he dealt: + </p> + <p> + The mistress rather more of beauty had, + </p> + <p> + And QUALITY of course must something add. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THIS scene just ended, t'other actor came, + </p> + <p> + Whose prompt arrival much surprised the dame, + </p> + <p> + For, as a husband, Clidamant had ne'er + </p> + <p> + Such ardour shown, he seemed beyond his sphere. + </p> + <p> + The lady to the girl imputed this, + </p> + <p> + And thought, to hint it, would not be amiss. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE entertainment o'er, away they went + </p> + <p> + To quit the dark abode they were intent. + </p> + <p> + The partner in amour repaired above; + </p> + <p> + But when the husband saw his wedded love + </p> + <p> + Ascend the stairs, and she the friend perceived, + </p> + <p> + We well may judge how bosoms beat and heaved. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE master of the house conceived it best + </p> + <p> + To keep the whole a secret in his breast. + </p> + <p> + But to discover ALL, his lovely rib + </p> + <p> + Appeared disposed, though wives can often fib; + </p> + <p> + The silliest of the throng (or high or low), + </p> + <p> + Most perfectly the science seem to know. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + SOME will pretend that Alice, in her heart + </p> + <p> + Was sorry she had acted such a part, + </p> + <p> + And not a better method sought to gain + </p> + <p> + The money which had caused her master's pain; + </p> + <p> + Lamented much the case, and tried to please + </p> + <p> + By ev'ry means that might his trouble ease. + </p> + <p> + But this is merely with design to make + </p> + <p> + The tale a more impressive feature take. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + TWO questions may agitate around; + </p> + <p> + The one, if 'mong the brotherhood renowned, + </p> + <p> + The husband, who thus felt disgraced, + </p> + <p> + Should (with the usual ornaments) be placed? + </p> + <p> + But I no grounds for such conclusion see: + </p> + <p> + Both friend and wife were from suspicion free; + </p> + <p> + Of one another they had never thought, + </p> + <p> + Though in the mystick scene together brought. + </p> + <p> + The other is:—Should she, who was misused, + </p> + <p> + Have sought revenge for being so abused? + </p> + <p> + Though this sufficiently I have maintained, + </p> + <p> + The lady inconsolable remained. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + HEAV'N guard the FAIR, who meet with ills like these, + </p> + <p> + And nothing can their wounded minds appease: + </p> + <p> + I many know howe'er, who would but laugh, + </p> + <p> + And treat such accidents as light as chaff. + </p> + <p> + But I have done: no more of that or this; + </p> + <p> + May ev'ry belle receive her lot of bliss! <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Dress-Maker" id="Dress-Maker"></a>THE DRESS-MAKER + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20395m.jpg" alt="20395m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20395.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">A</span> CLOISTERED nun had a lover + </p> + <p> + Dwelling in the neighb'ring town; + </p> + <p> + Both racked their brains to discover + </p> + <p> + How they best their love might crown. + </p> + <p> + The swain to pass the convent-door!— + </p> + <p> + No easy matter!—Thus they swore, + </p> + <p> + And wished it light.—I ne'er knew a nun + </p> + <p> + In such a pass to be outdone:— + </p> + <p> + In woman's clothes the youth must dress, + </p> + <p> + And gain admission. I confess + </p> + <p> + The ruse has oft been tried before, + </p> + <p> + But it succeeded as of yore. + </p> + <p> + Together in a close barred cell + </p> + <p> + The lovers were, and sewed all day, + </p> + <p> + Nor heeded how time flew away.— + </p> + <p> + "What's that I hear? Refection bell! + </p> + <p> + "'Tis time to part. Adieu!—Farewell!— + </p> + <p> + "How's this?" exclaimed the abbess, "why + </p> + <p> + "The last at table?"—"Madam, I + </p> + <p> + "Have had my dress-maker."—"The rent + </p> + <p> + "On which you've both been so intent + </p> + <p> + "Is hard to stop, for the whole day + </p> + <p> + "To sew and mend, you made her stay; + </p> + <p> + "Much work indeed you've had to do! + </p> + <p> + "—Madam, 't would last the whole night through, + </p> + <p> + "When in our task we find enjoyment + </p> + <p> + "There is no end of the employment." <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Gascon" id="Gascon"></a>THE GASCON + </h2><p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">I</span> AM always inclined to suspect + </p> + <p> + The best story under the sun + </p> + <p> + As soon as by chance I detect + </p> + <p> + That teller and hero are one. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + We're all of us prone to conceit, + </p> + <p> + And like to proclaim our own glory, + </p> + <p> + But our purpose we're apt to defeat + </p> + <p> + As actors in chief of our story. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + To prove the truth of what I state + </p> + <p> + Let me an anecdote relate: + </p> + <p> + A Gascon with his comrade sat + </p> + <p> + At tavern drinking. This and that + </p> + <p> + He vaunted with assertion pat. + </p> + <p> + From gasconade to gasconade + </p> + <p> + Passed to the conquests he had made + </p> + <p> + In love. A buxom country maid, + </p> + <p> + Who served the wine, with due attention + </p> + <p> + Lent patient ear to each invention, + </p> + <p> + And pressed her hands against her side + </p> + <p> + Her bursting merriment to hide. + </p> + <p> + To hear our Gascon talk, no Sue + </p> + <p> + Nor Poll in town but that he knew; + </p> + <p> + With each he'd passed a blissful night + </p> + <p> + More to their own than his delight. + </p> + <p> + This one he loved for she was fair, + </p> + <p> + That for her glossy ebon hair. + </p> + <p> + One miss, to tame his cruel rigour, + </p> + <p> + Had brought him gifts.—She owned his vigour + </p> + <p> + In short it wanted but his gaze + </p> + <p> + To set each trembling heart ablaze. + </p> + <p> + His strength surpassed his luck,—the test— + </p> + <p> + In one short night ten times he'd blessed + </p> + <p> + A dame who gratefully expressed + </p> + <p> + Her thanks with corresponding zest. + </p> + <p> + At this the maid burst forth, "What more? + </p> + <p> + "I never heard such lies before! + </p> + <p> + "Content were I if at that sport + </p> + <p> + "I had what that poor dame was short." <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Pitcher" id="Pitcher"></a>THE PITCHER + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20401m.jpg" alt="20401m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20401.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">T</span>HE simple Jane was sent to bring + </p> + <p> + Fresh water from the neighb'ring spring; + </p> + <p> + The matter pressed, no time to waste, + </p> + <p> + Jane took her jug, and ran in haste + </p> + <p> + The well to reach, but in her flurry + </p> + <p> + (The more the speed the worse the hurry), + </p> + <p> + Tripped on a rolling stone, and broke + </p> + <p> + Her precious pitcher,—ah! no joke! + </p> + <p> + Nay, grave mishap! 'twere better far + </p> + <p> + To break her neck than such a jar! + </p> + <p> + Her dame would beat and soundly rate her, + </p> + <p> + No way could Jane propitiate her. + </p> + <p> + Without a sou new jug to buy! + </p> + <p> + 'Twere better far for her to die! + </p> + <p> + O'erwhelmed by grief and cruel fears + </p> + <p> + Unhappy Jane burst into tears + </p> + <p> + "I can't go home without the delf," + </p> + <p> + Sobbed Jane, "I'd rather kill myself; + </p> + <p> + "So here am I resolved to die." + </p> + <p> + A friendly neighbour passing by + </p> + <p> + O'erheard our damsel's lamentation; + </p> + <p> + And kindly offered consolation: + </p> + <p> + "If death, sweet maiden, be thy bent, + </p> + <p> + "I'll aid thee in thy sad intent." + </p> + <p> + Throwing her down, he drew his dirk, + </p> + <p> + And plunged it in the maid,—a work + </p> + <p> + You'll say was cruel,—not so Jane, + </p> + <p> + Who even seemed to like the pain, + </p> + <p> + And hoped to be thus stabbed again. + </p> + <p> + Amid the weary world's alarms, + </p> + <p> + For some e'en death will have its charms; + </p> + <p> + "If this, my friend, is how you kill, + </p> + <p> + "Of breaking jugs I'll have my fill!" <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + + <p> + <a name="frontpiece2" id="frontpiece2"></a><img alt="frontpiece2.jpg (54K)" + src="images/frontpiece2.jpg" height="499" width="667" /> + </p> + + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="To_Promise" id="To_Promise"></a>TO PROMISE IS ONE THING + </h2> + <h2> + TO KEEP IT, ANOTHER + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20407m.jpg" alt="20407m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20407.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">J</span>OHN courts Perrette; but all in vain; + </p> + <p> + Love's sweetest oaths, and tears, and sighs + </p> + <p> + All potent spells her heart to gain + </p> + <p> + The ardent lover vainly tries: + </p> + <p> + Fruitless his arts to make her waver, + </p> + <p> + She will not grant the smallest favour: + </p> + <p> + A ruse our youth resolved to try + </p> + <p> + The cruel air to mollify:— + </p> + <p> + Holding his fingers ten outspread + </p> + <p> + To Perrette's gaze, and with no dread + </p> + <p> + "So often," said he, "can I prove, + </p> + <p> + "My sweet Perrette, how warm my love." + </p> + <p> + When lover's last avowals fail + </p> + <p> + To melt the maiden's coy suspicions + </p> + <p> + A lover's sign will oft prevail + </p> + <p> + To win the way to soft concessions: + </p> + <p> + Half won she takes the tempting bait; + </p> + <p> + Smiles on him, draws her lover nearer, + </p> + <p> + With heart no longer obdurate + </p> + <p> + She teaches him no more to fear her— + </p> + <p> + A pinch,—a kiss,—a kindling eye,— + </p> + <p> + Her melting glances,—nothing said.— + </p> + <p> + John ceases not his suit to ply + </p> + <p> + Till his first finger's debt is paid. + </p> + <p> + A second, third and fourth he gains, + </p> + <p> + Takes breath, and e'en a fifth maintains. + </p> + <p> + But who could long such contest wage? + </p> + <p> + Not I, although of fitting age, + </p> + <p> + Nor John himself, for here he stopped, + </p> + <p> + And further effort sudden dropped. + </p> + <p> + Perrette, whose appetite increased + </p> + <p> + just as her lover's vigour ceased, + </p> + <p> + In her fond reckoning defeated, + </p> + <p> + Considered she was greatly cheated— + </p> + <p> + If duty, well discharged, such blame + </p> + <p> + Deserve; for many a highborn dame + </p> + <p> + Would be content with such deceit. + </p> + <p> + But Perrette, as already told, + </p> + <p> + Out of her count, began to scold + </p> + <p> + And call poor John an arrant cheat + </p> + <p> + For promising and not performing. + </p> + <p> + John calmly listened to her storming, + </p> + <p> + And well content with work well done, + </p> + <p> + Thinking his laurels fairly won, + </p> + <p> + Cooly replied, on taking leave: + </p> + <p> + "No cause I see to fume and grieve; + </p> + <p> + "Or for such trifle to dispute; + </p> + <p> + "To promise and to execute + </p> + <p> + "Are not the same, be it confessed, + </p> + <p> + "Suffice it to have done one's best; + </p> + <p> + "With time I'll yet discharge what's due; + </p> + <p> + "Meanwhile, my sweet Perrette, adieu!" <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <h2> + <a name="Nightingale" id="Nightingale"></a>THE NIGHTINGALE + </h2> +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20411m.jpg" alt="20411m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20411.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> +<p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">N</span>O easy matter 'tis to hold, + </p> + <p> + Against its owner's will, the fleece + </p> + <p> + Who troubled by the itching smart + </p> + <p> + Of Cupid's irritating dart, + </p> + <p> + Eager awaits some Jason bold + </p> + <p> + To grant release. + </p> + <p> + E'en dragon huge, or flaming steer, + </p> + <p> + When Jason's loved will cause no fear. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + Duennas, grating, bolt and lock, + </p> + <p> + All obstacles can naught avail; + </p> + <p> + Constraint is but a stumbling block; + </p> + <p> + For youthful ardour must prevail. + </p> + <p> + Girls are precocious nowadays, + </p> + <p> + Look at the men with ardent gaze, + </p> + <p> + And longings' an infinity; + </p> + <p> + Trim misses but just in their teens + </p> + <p> + By day and night devise the means + </p> + <p> + To dull with subtlety to sleep + </p> + <p> + The Argus vainly set to keep + </p> + <p> + In safety their virginity. + </p> + <p> + Sighs, smiles, false tears, they'll fain employ + </p> + <p> + An artless lover to decoy. + </p> + <p> + I'll say no more, but leave to you, + </p> + <p> + Friend reader, to pronounce if true + </p> + <p> + What I've asserted when you have heard + </p> + <p> + How artful Kitty, caged her bird. <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + IN a small town in Italy, + </p> + <p> + The name of which I do not know, + </p> + <p> + Young Kitty dwelt, gay, pretty, free, + </p> + <p> + Varambon's child.—Boccacio + </p> + <p> + Omits her mother's name, which not + </p> + <p> + To you or me imports a jot. + </p> + <p> + At fourteen years our Kitty's charms + </p> + <p> + Were all that could be wished—plump arms, + </p> + <p> + A swelling bosom; on her cheeks + </p> + <p> + Roses' and lilies' mingled streaks, + </p> + <p> + A sparkling eye—all these, you know, + </p> + <p> + Speak well for what is found below. + </p> + <p> + With such advantages as these + </p> + <p> + No virgin sure could fail to please, + </p> + <p> + Or lack a lover; nor did Kate; + </p> + <p> + But little time she had to wait; + </p> + <p> + One soon appeared to seal her fate. + </p> + <p> + Young Richard saw her, loved her, wooed her— + </p> + <p> + What swain I ask could have withstood her? + </p> + <p> + Soft words, caresses, tender glances, + </p> + <p> + The battery of love's advances, + </p> + <p> + Soon lit up in the maiden's breast + </p> + <p> + The flame which his own heart possessed, + </p> + <p> + Soon growing to a burning fire + </p> + <p> + Of love and mutual desire. + </p> + <p> + Desire for what? My reader knows, + </p> + <p> + Or if he does not may suppose, + </p> + <p> + And not be very wond'rous wise. + </p> + <p> + When youthful lovers mingle sighs, + </p> + <p> + Believe me, friend, I am not wrong, + </p> + <p> + For one thing only do they long. + </p> + <p> + One check deferred our lover's bliss, + </p> + <p> + A thing quite natural, 'twas this: + </p> + <p> + The mother loved so well her child + </p> + <p> + That, fearful she might be beguiled, + </p> + <p> + She would not let her out of sight, + </p> + <p> + A single minute, day or night. + </p> + <p> + At mother's apron string all day + </p> + <p> + Kate whiled the weary hours away, + </p> + <p> + And shared her bed all night. Such love + </p> + <p> + In parents we must all approve, + </p> + <p> + Though Catherine, I must confess, + </p> + <p> + In place of so much tenderness + </p> + <p> + More liberty would have preferred. + </p> + <p> + To little girls maternal care + </p> + <p> + In such excess is right and fair, + </p> + <p> + But for a lass of fourteen years, + </p> + <p> + For whom one need have no such fears, + </p> + <p> + Solicitude is quite absurd, + </p> + <p> + And only bores her. Kitty could + </p> + <p> + No moment steal, do what she would, + </p> + <p> + To see her Richard. Sorely vexed + </p> + <p> + She was, and he still more perplexed. + </p> + <p> + In spite of all he might devise + </p> + <p> + A squeeze, a kiss, quick talk of eyes + </p> + <p> + Was all he could obtain, no more. + </p> + <p> + Bread butterless, a sanded floor, + </p> + <p> + It seemed no better. Joy like this + </p> + <p> + Could not suffice, more sterling bliss + </p> + <p> + Our lovers wished, nor would stop short + </p> + <p> + Till they'd obtained the thing they sought. + </p> + <p> + And thus it came about. One day + </p> + <p> + By chance they met, alone, away + </p> + <p> + From jealous parents. "What's the use;" + </p> + <p> + Said Richard, "of all our affection? + </p> + <p> + "Of love it is a rank abuse, + </p> + <p> + "And yields me nothing but dejection + </p> + <p> + "I see you without seeing you, + </p> + <p> + "Must always look another way, + </p> + <p> + "And if we meet I dare not stay, + </p> + <p> + "Must ev'ry inclination smother. + </p> + <p> + "I can't believe your love is true; + </p> + <p> + "I'll never own you really kind + </p> + <p> + "Unless some certain means you find + </p> + <p> + "For us to meet without your mother." + </p> + <p> + Kate answered: "Were it not too plain + </p> + <p> + "How warm my love, another strain + </p> + <p> + "I would employ. In converse vain + </p> + <p> + "Let us not waste our moments few; + </p> + <p> + "But think what it were best to do." + </p> + <p> + "If you will please me," Robert said, + </p> + <p> + "You must contrive to change your bed, + </p> + <p> + "And have it placed—well, let me see— + </p> + <p> + "Moved to the outer gallery, + </p> + <p> + "Where you will be alone and free. + </p> + <p> + "We there can meet and chat at leisure + </p> + <p> + "While others sleep, nor need we fear, + </p> + <p> + "Of merry tales I have a treasure + </p> + <p> + "To tell, but cannot tell them here." + </p> + <p> + Kate smiled at this for she knew well + </p> + <p> + What sort of tales he had to tell; + </p> + <p> + But promised she would do her best + </p> + <p> + And soon accomplish his request. + </p> + <p> + It was not easy, you'll admit, + </p> + <p> + But love lends foolish maidens wit; + </p> + <p> + And this is how she managed it. + </p> + <p> + The whole night long she kept awake, + </p> + <p> + Snored, sighed and kicked, as one possessed, + </p> + <p> + That parents both could get not rest, + </p> + <p> + So much she made the settle shake. + </p> + <p> + This is not strange. A longing girl, + </p> + <p> + With thoughts of sweetheart in her head, + </p> + <p> + In bed all night will sleepless twirl. + </p> + <p> + A flea is in her ear, 'tis said. + </p> + <p> + The morning broke. Of fleas and heat + </p> + <p> + Kitty complained. "Let me entreat, + </p> + <p> + "O mother, I may put my bed + </p> + <p> + "Out in the gallery," she said, + </p> + <p> + "'Tis cooler there, and Philomel + </p> + <p> + "Who warbles in the neigh'bring dell + </p> + <p> + "Will solace me." Ready consent + </p> + <p> + The simple mother gave, and went + </p> + <p> + To seek her spouse. "Our Kate, my dear, + </p> + <p> + "Will change her bed that she may hear + </p> + <p> + "The nightingale, and sleep more cool." + </p> + <p> + "Wife," said the good man, "You're a fool, + </p> + <p> + "And Kate too with her nightingale; + </p> + <p> + "Don't tell me such a foolish tale. + </p> + <p> + "She must remain. No doubt to-night + </p> + <p> + "Will fresher be. I sleep all right + </p> + <p> + "In spite of heat, and so can she. + </p> + <p> + "Is she more delicate than me?" + </p> + <p> + Incensed was Kate by this denial + </p> + <p> + After so promising a trial, + </p> + <p> + Nor would be beat, but firmly swore + </p> + <p> + To give more trouble than before. + </p> + <p> + That night again no wink she slept + </p> + <p> + But groaned and fretted, sighed and wept, + </p> + <p> + Upon her couch so tossed and turned, + </p> + <p> + The anxious mother quite concerned + </p> + <p> + Again her husband sought. "Our Kate + </p> + <p> + "To me seems greatly changed of late. + </p> + <p> + "You are unkind," she said to him, + </p> + <p> + "To thwart her simple, girlish whim. + </p> + <p> + "Why may she not her bed exchange, + </p> + <p> + "In naught will it the house derange? + </p> + <p> + "Placed in the passage she's as near + </p> + <p> + "To us as were she lying here. + </p> + <p> + "You do not love your child, and will + </p> + <p> + "With your unkindness make her ill." + </p> + <p> + "Pray cease," the husband cried, "to scold + </p> + <p> + "And take your whim. I ne'er could hold + </p> + <p> + "My own against a screaming wife; + </p> + <p> + "You'll drive me mad, upon my life. + </p> + <p> + "Her belly-full our Kate may get + </p> + <p> + "Of nightingale or of linnet." + </p> + <p> + The thing was settled. Kate obeyed, + </p> + <p> + And in a trice her bed was made, + </p> + <p> + And lover signalled. Who shall say + </p> + <p> + How long to both appeared that day, + </p> + <p> + That tedious day! But night arrived + </p> + <p> + And Richard too; he had contrived + </p> + <p> + By ladder, and a servant's aid, + </p> + <p> + To reach the chamber of the maid. + </p> + <p> + To tell how often they embraced, + </p> + <p> + How changed in form their tenderness, + </p> + <p> + Would lead to nothing but a waste + </p> + <p> + Of time, my readers will confess. + </p> + <p> + The longest, most abstruse discourse + </p> + <p> + Would lack precision, want the force + </p> + <p> + Their youthful ardour to portray. + </p> + <p> + To understand there's but one way— + </p> + <p> + Experience. The nightingale + </p> + <p> + Sang all night long his pleasing tale, + </p> + <p> + And though he made but little noise, + </p> + <p> + The lass was satisfied. Her joys + </p> + <p> + So exquisite that she averred + </p> + <p> + The other nightingale, the bird + </p> + <p> + Who warbles to the woods his bliss, + </p> + <p> + Was but an ass compared with this. + </p> + <p> + But nature could not long maintain + </p> + <p> + Of efforts such as these the strain; + </p> + <p> + Their forces spent, the lovers twain + </p> + <p> + In fond embrace fell fast asleep + </p> + <p> + Just as the dawn began to peep: + </p> + <p> + The father as he left his bed + </p> + <p> + By curiosity was led + </p> + <p> + To learn if Kitty soundly slept, + </p> + <p> + And softly to the passage crept. + </p> + <p> + "I'll see the influence," he said, + </p> + <p> + "Of nightingale and change of bed." + </p> + <p> + With bated breath, upon tip toes, + </p> + <p> + Close to the couch he cautious goes + </p> + <p> + Where Kitty lay in calm repose. + </p> + <p> + Excessive heat had made all clothes + </p> + <p> + Unbearable. The sleeping pair + </p> + <p> + Had cast them off, and lay as bare + </p> + <p> + As our first happy parents were + </p> + <p> + In Paradise. But in the place + </p> + <p> + Of apple, in her willing hand + </p> + <p> + Kate firmly grasp the magic wand + </p> + <p> + Which served to found the human race, + </p> + <p> + The which to name were a disgrace, + </p> + <p> + Though dames the most refined employ it; + </p> + <p> + Desire it, and much enjoy it, + </p> + <p> + If good Catullus tells us true. + </p> + <p> + The father scarce believed his view, + </p> + <p> + But keeping in his bosom pent + </p> + <p> + His anger, to his wife he went, + </p> + <p> + And said, "Get up, and come with me. + </p> + <p> + "At present I can plainly see + </p> + <p> + "Why Kate had such anxiety + </p> + <p> + "To hear the nightingale, for she + </p> + <p> + "To catch the bird so well has planned + </p> + <p> + "That now she holds him in her hand." + </p> + <p> + The mother almost wept for glee. + </p> + <p> + "A nightingale, oh! let me see. + </p> + <p> + "How large is he, and can he sing, + </p> + <p> + "And will he breed, the pretty thing? + </p> + <p> + "How did she catch him, clever child?" + </p> + <p> + Despite his grief the good man smiled. + </p> + <p> + "Much more than you expect you'll see. + </p> + <p> + "But hold your tongue, and come with me; + </p> + <p> + "For if your chattering is heard, + </p> + <p> + "Away will fly the timid bird; + </p> + <p> + "And you will spoil our daughter's game." + </p> + <p> + Who was surprised? It was the dame. + </p> + <p> + Her anger burst into a flame + </p> + <p> + As she the nightingale espied + </p> + <p> + Which Kitty held; she could have cried, + </p> + <p> + And scolded, called her nasty slut, + </p> + <p> + And brazen hussey, bitch, and—but + </p> + <p> + Her husband stopped her. "What's the use + </p> + <p> + "Of all your scolding and abuse? + </p> + <p> + "The mischief's done, in vain may you + </p> + <p> + "From now till doomsday fret and stew, + </p> + <p> + "Misfortune done you can't undo, + </p> + <p> + "But something may be done to mend: + </p> + <p> + "For notary this instant send, + </p> + <p> + "Bid holy priest and mayor attend. + </p> + <p> + "For their good offices I wait + </p> + <p> + "To set this nasty matter straight." + </p> + <p> + As he discoursed, Richard awoke, + </p> + <p> + And seeing that the sun had broke, + </p> + <p> + These troubled words to Kitty spoke + </p> + <p> + "Alas, my love, 'tis broad day light, + </p> + <p> + "How can I now effect my flight?" + </p> + <p> + "All will go well," rejoined the sire, + </p> + <p> + "I will not grumble, my just ire + </p> + <p> + "Were useless here; you have committed + </p> + <p> + "A wrong of which to be acquitted, + </p> + <p> + "Richard, there is one only way, + </p> + <p> + "My child you wed without delay. + </p> + <p> + "She's well brought up, young, full of health + </p> + <p> + "If fortune has not granted wealth, + </p> + <p> + "Her beauty you do not deny, + </p> + <p> + "So wed her, or prepare to die." + </p> + <p> + To hesitate in such a case + </p> + <p> + Would surely have been out of place + </p> + <p> + The girl he loved to take to wife, + </p> + <p> + Or in his prime to lose his life, + </p> + <p> + The point in truth needs no debate, + </p> + <p> + Nor did our Richard hesitate. + </p> + <p> + Besides, the most supreme delight + </p> + <p> + Of life he'd tasted one short night, + </p> + <p> + But one, in lovely Kitty's arms; + </p> + <p> + Could he so soon resign her charms! + </p> + <p> + While Richard, pleased with his escape + </p> + <p> + From what he feared an awkward scrape, + </p> + <p> + Was dreaming of his happy choice, + </p> + <p> + Our Kitty, by her father's voice + </p> + <p> + Awakened, from her hand let go + </p> + <p> + The cause of all her joy and woe, + </p> + <p> + And round her naked beauties wound + </p> + <p> + The sheet picked up from off the ground: + </p> + <p> + Meanwhile the notary appears + </p> + <p> + To put an end to all their fears. + </p> + <p> + They wrote, they signed, the sealed—and thus + </p> + <p> + The wedding ended free from fuss. + </p> + <p> + They left the happy couple there. + </p> + <p> + His satisfaction to declare, + </p> + <p> + Thus spoke their father to the pair: + </p> + <p> + "Take courage, children, have no care; + </p> + <p> + "The nightingale in cage is pent, + </p> + <p> + "May sing now to his heart's content." <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + +<div class="fig" style="width:65%"> + <img src="images/20421m.jpg" alt="20421m" width="100%" /><br /> + </div> + <h5> + <a href="images/20421.jpg"><i>Original</i></a> + </h5> + <h2> + <a name="Epitaph" id="Epitaph"></a>EPITAPH OF LA FONTAINE + </h2> + <h2> + MADE BY HIMSELF + </h2><p><br /><br /><br /><br /></p> +<p class="pfirst"><span class="dropcap" style="font-size: 4.00em">J</span>OHN, as he came, so went away, + </p> + <p> + Consuming capital and pay, + </p> + <p> + Holding superfluous riches cheap; + </p> + <p> + The trick of spending time he knew, + </p> + <p> + Dividing it in portions two, + </p> + <p> + For idling one, and one for sleep. <br /><br /><br /><br /> <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> + <p> + THE END. + </p> + + <p> + <br /><br /><br /><br /> + </p> +<pre xml:space="preserve"> + +<b>PG EDITOR'S BOOKMARKS</b> + +A pretty wife? Beware the monks as you would guard your life +Above all law is might +Avoid attorneys, if you comfort crave +But reason 's fruitless, with a soul on fire +By others do The same as you would like they should by you +Caresses lavish, and you'll find return +Criticism never stops short nor ever wants for subjects +Delays are dangerous, in love or war +Ev'ry grave's the same +Extremes in ev'ry thing will soonest tire +Favours, when conferred with sullen air, But little gratify +Few ponder long when they can dupe with ease +Fools or brutes, With whose ideas reason never suits +He who loves would fain be loved as well +He, who laughs, is always well received +Her doll, for thought, was just as well designed +Historick writ +How could he give what he had never got? +In childhood FEAR 's the lesson first we know! +In country villages each step is seen +In the midst of society, he was absent from it +Monks are knaves in Virtue's mask +No folly greater than to heighten pain +No grief so great, but what may be subdued +No pleasure's free from care you may rely +Not overburdened with a store of wit +Of't what we would not, we're obliged to do +Opportunity you can't discern—prithee go and learn +Perhaps one half our bliss to chance we owe +Possession had his passion quite destroyed +Regarded almost as an imbecile by the crowd +Removed from sight, but few for lovers grieve +Sight of meat brings appetite about +Some ostentation ever is with grief +The eyes:— Soul-speaking language, nothing can disguise +The god of love and wisdom ne'er agree +The less of such misfortunes said is best +The more of this I think, the less I know +The plaint is always greater than the woe +The promises of kings are airy dreams +The wish to please is ever found the same +Those who weep most the soonest gain relief +Though expectations oft away have flown +Tis all the same:—'twill never make me grieve +Tis past our pow'r to live on love or air +To avoid the tempting bit, 'Tis better far at table not to sit +Too much you may profess +Twere wrong with hope our fond desires to feed +Was always wishing distant scenes to know +We scarcely good can find without alloy +When husbands some assistance seemed to lack +When mourning 's nothing more than change of dress +When passion prompts, few obstacles can clog +While good, if spoken, scarcely is believed +Who knows too much, oft shows a want of sense +Who only make friends in order to gain voices in their favour +Who would wish to reduce Boccaccio to the same modesty as Virgil +Who, born for hanging, ever yet was drowned? +Wife beautiful, witty and chaste woman, who drove him to despair +You little dream for whom you guard the store +</pre> +<pre xml:space="preserve"> + + + + + +End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Tales and Novels, Complete +by Jean de La Fontaine + +*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE TALES AND NOVELS, COMPLETE *** + +***** This file should be named 5300-h.htm or 5300-h.zip ***** +This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: + http://www.gutenberg.net/5/3/0/5300/ + +Produced by David Widger + +Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions +will be renamed. + +Creating the works from public domain print editions means that no +one owns a United States copyright in these works, so the Foundation +(and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United States without +permission and without paying copyright royalties. Special rules, +set forth in the General Terms of Use part of this license, apply to +copying and distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works to +protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm concept and trademark. Project +Gutenberg is a registered trademark, and may not be used if you +charge for the eBooks, unless you receive specific permission. If you +do not charge anything for copies of this eBook, complying with the +rules is very easy. You may use this eBook for nearly any purpose +such as creation of derivative works, reports, performances and +research. They may be modified and printed and given away--you may do +practically ANYTHING with public domain eBooks. Redistribution is +subject to the trademark license, especially commercial +redistribution. + + + +*** START: FULL LICENSE *** + +THE FULL PROJECT GUTENBERG LICENSE +PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU DISTRIBUTE OR USE THIS WORK + +To protect the Project Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting the free +distribution of electronic works, by using or distributing this work +(or any other work associated in any way with the phrase "Project +Gutenberg"), you agree to comply with all the terms of the Full Project +Gutenberg-tm License (available with this file or online at +http://gutenberg.net/license). + + +Section 1. General Terms of Use and Redistributing Project Gutenberg-tm +electronic works + +1.A. By reading or using any part of this Project Gutenberg-tm +electronic work, you indicate that you have read, understand, agree to +and accept all the terms of this license and intellectual property +(trademark/copyright) agreement. If you do not agree to abide by all +the terms of this agreement, you must cease using and return or destroy +all copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in your possession. +If you paid a fee for obtaining a copy of or access to a Project +Gutenberg-tm electronic work and you do not agree to be bound by the +terms of this agreement, you may obtain a refund from the person or +entity to whom you paid the fee as set forth in paragraph 1.E.8. + +1.B. "Project Gutenberg" is a registered trademark. It may only be +used on or associated in any way with an electronic work by people who +agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement. There are a few +things that you can do with most Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works +even without complying with the full terms of this agreement. See +paragraph 1.C below. There are a lot of things you can do with Project +Gutenberg-tm electronic works if you follow the terms of this agreement +and help preserve free future access to Project Gutenberg-tm electronic +works. See paragraph 1.E below. + +1.C. The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation ("the Foundation" +or PGLAF), owns a compilation copyright in the collection of Project +Gutenberg-tm electronic works. Nearly all the individual works in the +collection are in the public domain in the United States. If an +individual work is in the public domain in the United States and you are +located in the United States, we do not claim a right to prevent you from +copying, distributing, performing, displaying or creating derivative +works based on the work as long as all references to Project Gutenberg +are removed. Of course, we hope that you will support the Project +Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting free access to electronic works by +freely sharing Project Gutenberg-tm works in compliance with the terms of +this agreement for keeping the Project Gutenberg-tm name associated with +the work. You can easily comply with the terms of this agreement by +keeping this work in the same format with its attached full Project +Gutenberg-tm License when you share it without charge with others. + +1.D. The copyright laws of the place where you are located also govern +what you can do with this work. Copyright laws in most countries are in +a constant state of change. If you are outside the United States, check +the laws of your country in addition to the terms of this agreement +before downloading, copying, displaying, performing, distributing or +creating derivative works based on this work or any other Project +Gutenberg-tm work. The Foundation makes no representations concerning +the copyright status of any work in any country outside the United +States. + +1.E. Unless you have removed all references to Project Gutenberg: + +1.E.1. The following sentence, with active links to, or other immediate +access to, the full Project Gutenberg-tm License must appear prominently +whenever any copy of a Project Gutenberg-tm work (any work on which the +phrase "Project Gutenberg" appears, or with which the phrase "Project +Gutenberg" is associated) is accessed, displayed, performed, viewed, +copied or distributed: + +This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with +almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or +re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included +with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.net + +1.E.2. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is derived +from the public domain (does not contain a notice indicating that it is +posted with permission of the copyright holder), the work can be copied +and distributed to anyone in the United States without paying any fees +or charges. If you are redistributing or providing access to a work +with the phrase "Project Gutenberg" associated with or appearing on the +work, you must comply either with the requirements of paragraphs 1.E.1 +through 1.E.7 or obtain permission for the use of the work and the +Project Gutenberg-tm trademark as set forth in paragraphs 1.E.8 or +1.E.9. + +1.E.3. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is posted +with the permission of the copyright holder, your use and distribution +must comply with both paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 and any additional +terms imposed by the copyright holder. Additional terms will be linked +to the Project Gutenberg-tm License for all works posted with the +permission of the copyright holder found at the beginning of this work. + +1.E.4. Do not unlink or detach or remove the full Project Gutenberg-tm +License terms from this work, or any files containing a part of this +work or any other work associated with Project Gutenberg-tm. + +1.E.5. Do not copy, display, perform, distribute or redistribute this +electronic work, or any part of this electronic work, without +prominently displaying the sentence set forth in paragraph 1.E.1 with +active links or immediate access to the full terms of the Project +Gutenberg-tm License. + +1.E.6. You may convert to and distribute this work in any binary, +compressed, marked up, nonproprietary or proprietary form, including any +word processing or hypertext form. However, if you provide access to or +distribute copies of a Project Gutenberg-tm work in a format other than +"Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other format used in the official version +posted on the official Project Gutenberg-tm web site (www.gutenberg.net), +you must, at no additional cost, fee or expense to the user, provide a +copy, a means of exporting a copy, or a means of obtaining a copy upon +request, of the work in its original "Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other +form. Any alternate format must include the full Project Gutenberg-tm +License as specified in paragraph 1.E.1. + +1.E.7. Do not charge a fee for access to, viewing, displaying, +performing, copying or distributing any Project Gutenberg-tm works +unless you comply with paragraph 1.E.8 or 1.E.9. + +1.E.8. You may charge a reasonable fee for copies of or providing +access to or distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works provided +that + +- You pay a royalty fee of 20% of the gross profits you derive from + the use of Project Gutenberg-tm works calculated using the method + you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. The fee is + owed to the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark, but he + has agreed to donate royalties under this paragraph to the + Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation. Royalty payments + must be paid within 60 days following each date on which you + prepare (or are legally required to prepare) your periodic tax + returns. Royalty payments should be clearly marked as such and + sent to the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation at the + address specified in Section 4, "Information about donations to + the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation." + +- You provide a full refund of any money paid by a user who notifies + you in writing (or by e-mail) within 30 days of receipt that s/he + does not agree to the terms of the full Project Gutenberg-tm + License. You must require such a user to return or + destroy all copies of the works possessed in a physical medium + and discontinue all use of and all access to other copies of + Project Gutenberg-tm works. + +- You provide, in accordance with paragraph 1.F.3, a full refund of any + money paid for a work or a replacement copy, if a defect in the + electronic work is discovered and reported to you within 90 days + of receipt of the work. + +- You comply with all other terms of this agreement for free + distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm works. + +1.E.9. If you wish to charge a fee or distribute a Project Gutenberg-tm +electronic work or group of works on different terms than are set +forth in this agreement, you must obtain permission in writing from +both the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation and Michael +Hart, the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark. Contact the +Foundation as set forth in Section 3 below. + +1.F. + +1.F.1. Project Gutenberg volunteers and employees expend considerable +effort to identify, do copyright research on, transcribe and proofread +public domain works in creating the Project Gutenberg-tm +collection. Despite these efforts, Project Gutenberg-tm electronic +works, and the medium on which they may be stored, may contain +"Defects," such as, but not limited to, incomplete, inaccurate or +corrupt data, transcription errors, a copyright or other intellectual +property infringement, a defective or damaged disk or other medium, a +computer virus, or computer codes that damage or cannot be read by +your equipment. + +1.F.2. LIMITED WARRANTY, DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES - Except for the "Right +of Replacement or Refund" described in paragraph 1.F.3, the Project +Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the owner of the Project +Gutenberg-tm trademark, and any other party distributing a Project +Gutenberg-tm electronic work under this agreement, disclaim all +liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal +fees. YOU AGREE THAT YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE, STRICT +LIABILITY, BREACH OF WARRANTY OR BREACH OF CONTRACT EXCEPT THOSE +PROVIDED IN PARAGRAPH F3. YOU AGREE THAT THE FOUNDATION, THE +TRADEMARK OWNER, AND ANY DISTRIBUTOR UNDER THIS AGREEMENT WILL NOT BE +LIABLE TO YOU FOR ACTUAL, DIRECT, INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR +INCIDENTAL DAMAGES EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH +DAMAGE. + +1.F.3. LIMITED RIGHT OF REPLACEMENT OR REFUND - If you discover a +defect in this electronic work within 90 days of receiving it, you can +receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending a +written explanation to the person you received the work from. If you +received the work on a physical medium, you must return the medium with +your written explanation. The person or entity that provided you with +the defective work may elect to provide a replacement copy in lieu of a +refund. If you received the work electronically, the person or entity +providing it to you may choose to give you a second opportunity to +receive the work electronically in lieu of a refund. If the second copy +is also defective, you may demand a refund in writing without further +opportunities to fix the problem. + +1.F.4. Except for the limited right of replacement or refund set forth +in paragraph 1.F.3, this work is provided to you 'AS-IS' WITH NO OTHER +WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO +WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTIBILITY OR FITNESS FOR ANY PURPOSE. + +1.F.5. Some states do not allow disclaimers of certain implied +warranties or the exclusion or limitation of certain types of damages. +If any disclaimer or limitation set forth in this agreement violates the +law of the state applicable to this agreement, the agreement shall be +interpreted to make the maximum disclaimer or limitation permitted by +the applicable state law. The invalidity or unenforceability of any +provision of this agreement shall not void the remaining provisions. + +1.F.6. INDEMNITY - You agree to indemnify and hold the Foundation, the +trademark owner, any agent or employee of the Foundation, anyone +providing copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in accordance +with this agreement, and any volunteers associated with the production, +promotion and distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works, +harmless from all liability, costs and expenses, including legal fees, +that arise directly or indirectly from any of the following which you do +or cause to occur: (a) distribution of this or any Project Gutenberg-tm +work, (b) alteration, modification, or additions or deletions to any +Project Gutenberg-tm work, and (c) any Defect you cause. + + +Section 2. Information about the Mission of Project Gutenberg-tm + +Project Gutenberg-tm is synonymous with the free distribution of +electronic works in formats readable by the widest variety of computers +including obsolete, old, middle-aged and new computers. It exists +because of the efforts of hundreds of volunteers and donations from +people in all walks of life. + +Volunteers and financial support to provide volunteers with the +assistance they need, is critical to reaching Project Gutenberg-tm's +goals and ensuring that the Project Gutenberg-tm collection will +remain freely available for generations to come. In 2001, the Project +Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation was created to provide a secure +and permanent future for Project Gutenberg-tm and future generations. +To learn more about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation +and how your efforts and donations can help, see Sections 3 and 4 +and the Foundation web page at http://www.pglaf.org. + + +Section 3. Information about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive +Foundation + +The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation is a non profit +501(c)(3) educational corporation organized under the laws of the +state of Mississippi and granted tax exempt status by the Internal +Revenue Service. The Foundation's EIN or federal tax identification +number is 64-6221541. Its 501(c)(3) letter is posted at +http://pglaf.org/fundraising. Contributions to the Project Gutenberg +Literary Archive Foundation are tax deductible to the full extent +permitted by U.S. federal laws and your state's laws. + +The Foundation's principal office is located at 4557 Melan Dr. S. +Fairbanks, AK, 99712., but its volunteers and employees are scattered +throughout numerous locations. Its business office is located at +809 North 1500 West, Salt Lake City, UT 84116, (801) 596-1887, email +business@pglaf.org. Email contact links and up to date contact +information can be found at the Foundation's web site and official +page at http://pglaf.org + +For additional contact information: + Dr. Gregory B. Newby + Chief Executive and Director + gbnewby@pglaf.org + + +Section 4. Information about Donations to the Project Gutenberg +Literary Archive Foundation + +Project Gutenberg-tm depends upon and cannot survive without wide +spread public support and donations to carry out its mission of +increasing the number of public domain and licensed works that can be +freely distributed in machine readable form accessible by the widest +array of equipment including outdated equipment. Many small donations +($1 to $5,000) are particularly important to maintaining tax exempt +status with the IRS. + +The Foundation is committed to complying with the laws regulating +charities and charitable donations in all 50 states of the United +States. Compliance requirements are not uniform and it takes a +considerable effort, much paperwork and many fees to meet and keep up +with these requirements. We do not solicit donations in locations +where we have not received written confirmation of compliance. To +SEND DONATIONS or determine the status of compliance for any +particular state visit http://pglaf.org + +While we cannot and do not solicit contributions from states where we +have not met the solicitation requirements, we know of no prohibition +against accepting unsolicited donations from donors in such states who +approach us with offers to donate. + +International donations are gratefully accepted, but we cannot make +any statements concerning tax treatment of donations received from +outside the United States. U.S. laws alone swamp our small staff. + +Please check the Project Gutenberg Web pages for current donation +methods and addresses. Donations are accepted in a number of other +ways including including checks, online payments and credit card +donations. To donate, please visit: http://pglaf.org/donate + + +Section 5. General Information About Project Gutenberg-tm electronic +works. + +Professor Michael S. Hart is the originator of the Project Gutenberg-tm +concept of a library of electronic works that could be freely shared +with anyone. For thirty years, he produced and distributed Project +Gutenberg-tm eBooks with only a loose network of volunteer support. + + +Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks are often created from several printed +editions, all of which are confirmed as Public Domain in the U.S. +unless a copyright notice is included. Thus, we do not necessarily +keep eBooks in compliance with any particular paper edition. + + +Most people start at our Web site which has the main PG search facility: + + http://www.gutenberg.net + +This Web site includes information about Project Gutenberg-tm, +including how to make donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary +Archive Foundation, how to help produce our new eBooks, and how to +subscribe to our email newsletter to hear about new eBooks. + + +</pre> + </body> +</html> |