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diff --git a/.gitattributes b/.gitattributes new file mode 100644 index 0000000..d7b82bc --- /dev/null +++ b/.gitattributes @@ -0,0 +1,4 @@ +*.txt text eol=lf +*.htm text eol=lf +*.html text eol=lf +*.md text eol=lf diff --git a/LICENSE.txt b/LICENSE.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000..6312041 --- /dev/null +++ b/LICENSE.txt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +This eBook, including all associated images, markup, improvements, +metadata, and any other content or labor, has been confirmed to be +in the PUBLIC DOMAIN IN THE UNITED STATES. + +Procedures for determining public domain status are described in +the "Copyright How-To" at https://www.gutenberg.org. + +No investigation has been made concerning possible copyrights in +jurisdictions other than the United States. Anyone seeking to utilize +this eBook outside of the United States should confirm copyright +status under the laws that apply to them. diff --git a/README.md b/README.md new file mode 100644 index 0000000..7b1eae3 --- /dev/null +++ b/README.md @@ -0,0 +1,2 @@ +Project Gutenberg (https://www.gutenberg.org) public repository for +eBook #52717 (https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/52717) diff --git a/old/52717-0.txt b/old/52717-0.txt deleted file mode 100644 index aee9cab..0000000 --- a/old/52717-0.txt +++ /dev/null @@ -1,1662 +0,0 @@ -The Project Gutenberg EBook of The Scape-Goat, by John Poole - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most -other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions -whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of -the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at -www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have -to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook. - -Title: The Scape-Goat - A Farce in One Act - -Author: John Poole - -Release Date: August 4, 2016 [EBook #52717] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: UTF-8 - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE SCAPE-GOAT *** - - - - -Produced by David Edwards, readbueno and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This -file was produced from images generously made available -by The Internet Archive) - - - - - - ------------------------------------------------------------------------- - - - - - The Scape-Goat - - A Farce in One Act - - - THE - - SCAPE-GOAT; - - A FARCE, - - IN ONE ACT, - - - PERFORMED, FOR THE FIRST TIME, ON FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 25, 1825, - - AT THE - - THEATRE ROYAL, COVENT GARDEN. - - BY JOHN POOLE, ESQ. - - AUTHOR OF “PAUL PRY,” “TRIBULATION,” “MARRIED AND SINGLE,” - “SIMPSON AND CO.” &C. &C. - - - LONDON: - - PUBLISHED BY SHERWOOD, GILBERT, AND PIPER, PATERNOSTER ROW. - - - 1826. - - _Price Eighteen-Pence._ - ------------------------------------------------------------------------- - - - - - Gye and Balne, Printers, Gracechurch-Street. - ------------------------------------------------------------------------- - - - - - ⁂ A French Piece, called “_Le Precepteur dans l’embarras_,” - furnished the ground-work of the following Farce. - ------------------------------------------------------------------------- - - - - - DRAMATIS PERSONÆ. - - - _Old Eustace_ MR. BLANCHARD. - _Charles_, (_his son_) MR. COOPER. - _Ignatius Polyglot_ MR. W. FARREN. - _Robin_ MR. MEADOWS. - _Master Frederick_ - - _Harriet_ MISS A. JONES. - _Molly Maggs_ MISS JONES. - ------------------------------------------------------------------------- - - - - - THE SCAPE-GOAT. - - - SCENE—_Polyglot’s study. A door on each side, conducting to other - apartments. An opening to the garden, at the back of the stage. - Another door leading to the interior of the house. Globes, - books, maps, &c. are scattered about._ - - ROBIN _discovered, turning a globe_. - -_Robin._ ’Tis an extraordinary thing, that, do what I will, I can’t make -myself sensible. I turn the world topsy-turvy for hours together, as I -see my young master, Mr. Charles, do; like Mr. Ignatius Polyglot, his -tutor, I sometimes look into a book full of Greek or Latin; but all to -no purpose. Ah! Mr. Polyglot must be in the right: he can’t bear the -sight of a woman in the house, for fear Mr. Charles should fall in love, -and neglect his studies; and, for my part, I’m sure that, if all the -Greek I have got in my pocket (_shewing a book_) were cramm’d into my -head, one thought of my sweet little Somersetshire lass, Molly Maggs, -would drive it out again. - - _Enter_ MOLLY MAGGS, _from the Garden_. - -_Molly._ Hist! hist! Robin! - -_Robin._ What! my dear Molly! You may come in. - -_Molly._ I’m afeard, Robin. - -_Robin._ There’s nothing to be afraid of just now. - -_Molly._ Where’s Mr. Ignoramus, the tutorer, then? - -_Robin._ Mr. Ignatius you mean. He’s out, taking his evening’s walk. - -_Molly._ Be he? I hope he be gone down towards the little bridge. - -_Robin._ Why? - -_Molly._ The last time he went that way, he were so busy at what he -called soldering a problem, that he stumbled over into the brook. If I -had been in your place, Robin, before I pulled him out again I’d ha’ -made him promise to consent to our marriage, or I’d ha’ let him bide -there till doomsday. - -_Robin._ Molly, Molly, you don’t like Mr. Polyglot. - -_Molly._ Why don’t he like me then? - -_Robin._ It is not you alone, but he would dislike any other young -maiden about the house the same. - -_Molly._ And what for? there’s no reason in that. Am I to blame? I’m -sure ’tis no fault of mine, Robin, that I’m a young maiden. Ha! ha! ha! -A pretty to-do there’d be if he should catch me here—in his own -apartments too! - -_Robin._ So there would. I tremble to think of it; and so, Molly, you’d -better— - -_Molly._ I don’t care: if he says any thing to me, I’ll give him his -own. Besides, our master, old Master Eustace, will be home in a few -days, and we’ll ask his leave to be married, in spite of old tutorer. - -_Robin._ No, no, we must not displease him; he’s steward as well as -tutorer, and— - -_Molly._ He’ll discharge us? let him. I’m not afeard of wanting a -service. I have relations who are up in the world. I’m first cousin -to Sally Maggs, who is head chambermaid at the Bell, at -Winchester—Chattering Sally, as they call her, and well they may, -for she is chatter, chatter, chatter— - -_Robin._ In that respect, Molly, you don’t disgrace the relationship. - -_Molly._ Discharge us, indeed! the sooner the better; we may then get -married when we please. What does the foolish old chap mean by not -liking folks to marry? I wish his father had been of the same mind, and -then Mr. Ignoramus would not have been here to torment us. - -_Robin._ Well, well, though he is a little crabbed and sour, he’s a good -old soul at bottom. He’d go through fire and water to serve young Master -Charles. - -_Molly._ With a vengeance! Poor young gentleman! he’s grown as -melancholy as a willow tree: and no wonder: at four-and-twenty to be -kept in leading-strings like a baby! But no good will come of it, see if -there do; and I wish that Master Charles would give him the slip one of -these days, on purpose to plague him. O, if I could but catch the old -one doing any thing amiss— - -_Robin._ Think kindlier of him, Molly; we’ll wait till we find him in a -good humour, and then perhaps— - -_Molly._ If we wait till then, Robin, you need be in no hurry to buy the -wedding ring. Well, I’ll go. - -_Robin._ Do; for after all ’twould do no good to anger him. And, Lord! -if he were to see us here together!-Well, good bye, my dear Molly. - -_Molly._ Good bye, Robin! (_loitering_) Good bye, Robin! - -_Robin._ (_Kisses her_) Bless your little heart! - - _Enter, from the garden_, IGNATIUS POLYGLOT, - _with a book_. ROBIN _runs off_. - -_Molly._ O, crimini! - -_Poly._ What do I behold! Under my nose! my very nose! here too! in my -study, the sanctuary of science and of learning! - -_Molly._ Well, if nothing worse was ever learnt here, Mr. Ignoramus— - -_Poly._ Ignatius.—But what atonement can you make for this? - -_Molly._ Atonement! I’ve done nothing to atone for. - -_Poly._ Nothing! Do you call that nothing? Did I not see? Did I not -hear? Nothing! _O tem_—but you don’t understand Latin. - -_Molly._ Latin, indeed! no, nor Greek neither; and I’m sure ’tis all -Greek you are talking to me. What did you see? what did you hear? You -heard Robin say good bye, that was all. - -_Poly._ Peace! I’m a linguist, and in none of the seventeen languages -I’m acquainted with, does that mean good bye. - -_Molly._ Then I wouldn’t give seventeen figs to be as learned as you -are, and your seventeen languages are not worth talking. - -_Poly._ To what is the poor youth exposed! Mischief! Serpent! Woman! I -pity, and tremble for, the unfortunate lad. - -_Molly._ ’Tis a misfortune not likely to happen to you. - -_Poly._ But ’tis I alone who am to blame. I ought not to have allowed -one of the deluding sex to approach those innocent and unsuspecting -youths. Had my pupil, Charles, beheld this, it might have put things -into his head, which—But there will yet be time to save them. To-morrow, -at day-break, you will quit this house. - -_Molly._ Nay, and you wouldn’t be so cruel, Mr. Poll-parrot. - -_Poly._ Polyglot.—I have said it; reply not. - -_Molly._ I have not done any harm, and I’m sure I did not think any -harm. ’Tis no fault of mine if Robin is in love with me: he fell in love -of his own accord, indeed he did. - -_Poly._ Love! (_looks fearfully about._) Silence!—If Charles should hear -that dangerous word—Retire—Withdraw—begone. - -_Molly._ (_Bursting into tears._) O dearee me! Pray, good, kind Mr. -Ignoramus, forgive me this once. Would you have it upon your conscience -to turn a poor lass out of her service, and send her upon the wide world -without a friend to protect her? Would’ee now, Mr. Ignoramus, would’ee? - -_Poly._ Go away, my dear, and—No, I will not give way to the weakness of -our common nature, but prove myself, in the discharge of my duty, -inflexible as the first Brutus! - -_Molly._ And well you may call him so, if he was as stony-hearted as you -are. Will you forgive me? - -_Poly._ No! - -_Molly._ You won’t? Nay, then, I’ll tell you a bit of my mind; I’ll do -that, an’ I die for it. For all your grave looks, I’ll be sworn you are -no better than your neighbours; I know you arn’t. I’ll pass my days in -watching you, I will; and if ever I catch you saying “good bye,” as I -know I shall, then, when you are in trouble, and in need of indulgence, -you shall find me as pityless as yourself. There; carry that bundle upon -your shoulders, and now—I’ll go and pack up mine. - - [_Exit._ - -_Poly._ The little serpent! Her tears, her imploring looks, had well -nigh—But I must be firm: I see the danger, and must protect my pupil -against the snares of these pernicious creatures. Poor lad! he is -innocent, and knows not the seductive power of love. My example and -instructions have so fortified his mind, so hardened his heart against -all silly, soft impressions, that, thanks to me, he may hope to pass -through life as becomes a philosopher—in a happy indifference to all its -joys, its pleasures, and its cares. He comes!—My dear disciple! - - _Enter_ CHARLES, _in violent agitation_. - -_Charles._ My dear sir, I’m glad you are returned. - -_Poly._ Your impatience pleases me. Come, is it to be Sophocles this -evening? - -_Charles._ No:—it is not that, sir,—but— - -_Poly._ Well, well; we must sometimes relax,—make holiday; so, instead -of Sophocles, we’ll amuse ourselves with a problem in Euclid. - -_Charles._ Confound Euclid! as he has often confounded me. No, sir; I—in -short, you see me in the greatest distress. - -_Poly._ In distress! You alarm me! My dear boy, my dear child, what is -the matter? - -_Charles._ My father is returning; he is now galloping up the avenue, -and I see no refuge from my difficulties but in death. - -_Poly._ Mercy on me! what do you mean? No refuge but in—and in his -father’s absence too! Consider, that for all that concerns you, I am -responsible. Wait, at least, till he arrives, and— - -_Charles._ No, I am resolved; the matter is pressing, and there’s no -time for deliberation. - -_Poly._ And he has not half finished his studies! (_Rushes into his -arms_) Charles—my dear boy—be composed—look at me—who am I? have I not -been your guide, your protector, your friend, since the hour you were -born. You know I love you; that there is nothing on earth I would not do -to see you happy; tell me, then, what it is afflicts you. - -_Charles._ You will betray me to my father, and I dread his displeasure -worse than death. - -_Poly._ Betray you! Never; be it what it may. - -_Charles._ Swear! - -_Poly._ I never swear. - -_Charles._ Swear, or this instant will I— - -_Poly._ Hold! your danger inspires me with the devotion of an antique -Roman: I swear, (_raising his hand_) _Per Jovem!_ By Jupiter! I swear. - -_Charles._ Enough! I will trust you. (_Aside_) And yet I dare not tell -him the whole.—I—I am in love. - -_Poly._ O, horror! In love! ’Tis epidemic—’tis running through the -house! Robin, Molly, and now—How, sir! and at your age, only just turned -of four-and-twenty; the thing is incredible, and— - -_Charles._ Do but hear me, sir. - -_Poly._ In love! it cannot be: why, he has Greek, Latin, algebra, and -mathematics at his finger’s ends. And is this the termination of my -hopes? You, whom I destined for a philosopher; you, whose name I fondly -hoped to see placed side by side with the glorious names of Archimedes -and Aristotle! Did love find out the square of the hypothenuse? Did -love— - -_Charles._ O, sir, if the bare avowal of my affection so displease you, -what will you say when I confess to you that—but here comes my father. -(_Aside._) Where shall I conceal my dear Harriet? - -_Poly._ Be composed; he must not observe our agitation. - -_Charles._ Remember your promise, or I’ll keep mine. Pop! - -_Poly._ My dear boy I’ll not betray you, I—Oh! - - _Enter_ OLD EUSTACE, _followed by_ ROBIN, _to whom he gives his - great-coat, hat and whip_. - -_Eustace._ Charles, my boy, I’m glad to see you. Mr. Polyglot, my worthy -friend, your hand. You did not expect to see me so soon. - -_Poly._ No, sir, we—we didn’t expect you till last week. - -_Eustace._ Till next week, you mean. The truth is, I was willing to take -you by surprise, and see how things had been managed during my absence; -but I might have spared myself the trouble. You, Mr. Polyglot, have the -superintendance of my servants, and are accountable for their conduct;— - -_Robin._ Don’t tell about Molly and me, sir. (_Aside to Polyglot._) - -_Eustace._ My son is under your especial care and observance;— - -_Charles._ Remember! (_Aside to Polyglot._) - -_Eustace._ And so perfect is my reliance on your attention, prudence, -and wisdom, that I am persuaded you have nothing to relate of what has -passed in the house that will not receive my fullest approbation. - -_Poly._ Yes—no—certainly. - -_Eustace._ Well, Charles, my arrival must not interrupt your studies; -retire to your own room till supper is ready. Mr. Polyglot, I have -something of importance to communicate to you. Robin, desire the cook to -be expeditious; my ride has given me an appetite: and do you put lights -into my study: after supper, I shall be occupied there for an hour or -two. - -_Charles._ (_Stops Robin as he is going off._) What, sir! the pavilion -at the end of the garden? - -_Eustace._ Ay, I have no other. - -_Charles._ You had better not go there to-night, sir; ’tis damp, and— - -_Eustace._ Damp? nonsense! Robin, do as I desire. - -_Charles._ (_Aside._) ’Tis there I have concealed her. There is not a -moment to be lost. - - [_Exit._ - -_Robin._ (_Whispers to Polyglot._) Be kind to poor Molly, and forgive -her, sir. - -_Poly._ (_Lost in thought._) No, Molly—yes, Robin, yes. - -_Robin._ Thankye, sir; it shall never happen again. - - [_Exit._ - -_Eustace._ Why, what is the meaning of all this? Tell me, Mr. Polyglot, -what is the matter here? This confusion, and whispering!—Surely my -sudden arrival cannot have occasioned any inconvenience. I expected to -see you all delighted, and you receive me with faces as long as my arm. - -_Poly._ Uncommonly long! uncommonly long! - -_Eustace._ (_Aside._) I perceive: the philosopher is in one of his fits -of abstraction.—But there is an air of restraint about Charles, for -which I am at a loss to account. Has he done any thing to provoke your -displeasure? - -_Poly._ (_Aside._) I dare not inform him.—No, no—a trifle. - -_Eustace._ You are right to be severe with him: he is now arrived at an -age when the strictest watchfulness over his conduct is necessary. Ah! -Mr. Polyglot, your example has made him what he is; your vigilance must -keep him so. - -_Poly._ I—you flatter me. - -_Eustace._ I will now, in few words, confide to you the object of the -journey from which I have just returned: it was to make arrangements for -the marriage of my son. - -_Poly._ His marriage! - -_Eustace._ I anticipate your objection, and will answer it. - -_Poly._ I have no objection to offer. (_Aside._) Then it turns out as it -should be. Charles is already in love; so the marriage comes -opportunely. - -_Eustace._ No objection! Why, till now, you have always held that no man -ought to marry till he’s sixty; that is to say, till he has finished his -education, and seen a little of the world. - -_Poly._ You make a slight mistake; I always said, at least I meant to -say, four-and-twenty. - -_Eustace._ Well, I’m glad it is so; for, to say the truth, although I am -of your opinion, that it is not prudent to marry whilst a mere baby, yet -I always thought sixty somewhat of the latest. - -_Poly._ Ay, ay, for a young man it is, but—(_Aside_) What a relief is -this to my mind! How happy this will make my dear boy! - -_Eustace._ I’m delighted to find you are of my opinion. Next week I’ll -take Charles to town with me; he shall see the young lady; I do not mean -to control his choice; but if he like her, and she like him, they shall -marry instantly. - -_Poly._ Like her! my dear sir, I’m happy to tell you that he is already -in—(_Aside._) My oath—_per Jovem!_ - -_Eustace._ Come, Mr. Polyglot, follow me to the supper room; we’ll talk -further of this. I can never repay you, my good friend, for your care of -my son. As I said before, your example has made him what he is: for his -virtues he is indebted to you; and, were it possible he could be guilty -of any crime or folly, so completely is he under your guidance, that I -should hold you more to blame than him. - - [_Exit._ - -_Poly._ What a fortunate turn has this affair taken! Since he is in -love, he must naturally be anxious to marry. Yet he did not tell me with -whom he is in love. I do not pretend to understand those matters; but I -presume that, being in love, he wants a wife, and—Oh! there can’t be a -doubt of it; so long as he get a wife, surely it can’t signify who. He -comes; I’ll communicate the joyful tidings to him. - - _Enter_ CHARLES, _in violent agitation_. - -_Charles._ I have been anxiously waiting the departure of my father. - -_Poly._ My dear boy, quiet your apprehensions; ’tis all right. - -_Charles._ ’Tis all wrong, and fifty times worse than before. - -_Poly._ What mean you? - -_Charles._ The unexpected arrival of my father has thrown me into a -difficulty scarcely surmountable. Alas! you know but half my unhappy -story. - -_Poly._ I hope then it is the worst half, for really I have suffered— - -_Charles._ I tremble to avow to you the full extent of my folly, and yet -I dare no longer conceal any circumstance of it from you. The urgency of -our situation, the danger that awaits us— - -_Poly._ Come, come, courage; tell me all. - -_Charles._ Know then, that having become acquainted with a young lady, -the orphan daughter of an officer in the army, I grew enamoured of her, -was assiduous in my attentions to her, succeeded in winning her -affections, and finally— - -_Poly._ Eh? What!—say no more—Oh! Charles, Charles— - -_Charles._ Do but hear me to the end of my story. - -_Poly._ I have heard too much already. And are these the fruits of my -instructions? Is it by such wickedness you repay my anxious care of you? - -_Charles._ You mistake me, sir; if you would but listen— - -_Poly._ Never expect from me either pardon or indulgence. Had you indeed -formed such a bond of union as might without a blush have been -acknowledged, it is possible I might— - -_Charles._ What, sir! would you have sanctioned our marriage? Obtained -for us my father’s pardon, his approbation? - -_Poly._ In that case, perhaps, I would have interfered in your behalf; -for marriage is a sacred contract, and must be respected: but, as it is— - -_Charles._ (_Joyfully._) Then my worthy Mentor, my best of friends, be -comforted: I _am_ married. - -_Poly._ (_Struck with astonishment._) Married! - -_Charles._ I am, I am. Marriage, as you say, is a sacred contract; and, -by your own shewing, you are bound to assist us. - -_Poly._ Married! So vigilant as I have been, yet has he contrived to—I -must at once reveal this to your father. (_Going._) - -_Charles._ And your oath! - -_Poly._ Oh! - -_Charles._ Betray me, and my life, my dear wife’s too, may become a -sacrifice. But no, you will not; for your own sake, you dare not. Upon -you alone will fall the blame.—Under whose especial care have I been -placed? Yours. Whose duty was it to watch over my conduct? Yours. Whose -vigilance was at fault when I could contrive a secret marriage? Yours. -My father has made you responsible for my actions: _ergo_: it is against -you alone that my father will manifest his displeasure at my misconduct. - -_Poly._ (_His countenance gradually betraying his satisfaction._) The -dear boy! He is indebted to me for his logic. Aristotle himself would -have been proud of such a pupil. That’s something like conducting an -argument. I have not a word to reply. - -_Charles._ But there is no time to be lost; you must at once decide. If -you consent to protect us, we shall for ever consider you our friend—our -saviour. You shall pass your days with us; we will be a comfort to your -age; our children shall thank you; and, as you moulded their father’s -mind, so shall you give the bent to their’s. - -_Poly._ My dear Charles, I will encounter anything for your sake: -whatever may befal me, I swear not to betray your interests. This will -be a sad disappointment to your father. You must allow me a few days to -consider the best mode of breaking the affair to him. But where have you -left your—it was only this morning I rapped his knuckles for a false -quantity—your wife? - -_Charles._ Left her? She’s here! - -_Poly._ What, here! in the house? - -_Charles._ In my father’s study, in the garden. Taking advantage of his -absence, I have, for many days, concealed her there; but his sudden -return compels me to seek some other retreat for her. Aided by the -growing darkness, I have removed her. She is waiting there in the -garden. I will confide her to your care. - -_Poly._ Hold, hold! Confide a woman to my care! - -_Charles._ Ay; your apartment is the most secure. No one will suspect -that a female is concealed there. (_Runs towards the garden._) Harriet, -Harriet! This way. - -_Poly._ (_In great consternation._) Stay—what would you do? Should she -be discovered here, I’m ruined, undone!—Oh! she’s here! - - _Enter_ HARRIET. - -_Charles._ Fear nothing, my darling love; this is our best friend. - -_Harriet._ In what terms can we express our gratitude, sir? - -_Poly._ Indeed, miss—mistress—my good lady, I—my head is turning—But, -tell me, Charles, how did you contrive, without my knowledge, to— - -_Charles._ My wife will explain all to you. In the mean time I’ll keep -watch without. Should my father take us by surprise, all will be lost. -My good, kind friend, I confide to your care all I value in the world—my -own dear Harriet. - -_Poly._ Why—why—you would not leave me alone with her? - -_Charles._ (_Not attending to him._) Be composed, love; all will be -well. - - [_Exit._ - -_Poly._ Charles, Charles! Don’t leave me alone with her. - -_Harriet._ Once more, sir, let me thank you for your kindness. - -_Poly._ (_Avoiding her._) Thank me, indeed! Oh! if you knew— - -_Harriet._ But why that angry look? Would you abandon us? In your -friendship, and my husband’s love, is now my only hope. - -_Poly._ What touching accents! I never before—’Twas with tones like -these the serpent must have seduced my poor innocent boy. (_Severely._) -It is my duty, miss—my duty, madam, to remind you that the step you have -taken is—(_She looks abashed._)—Not that I would say anything to give -you pain, but—tell me who you are, my dear. - -_Harriet._ The daughter of Colonel Mowbray, who, dying five years ago, -left me without fortune, without friends, without a protector. I sought -an asylum in the neighbouring village, and soon afterwards became -acquainted with Mr. Eustace. You know his worth, and can you wonder if— - -_Poly._ Poor thing! Well, don’t weep, my dear; your cares will soon be -at an end. Not but that so imprudent a step as a clandestine marriage -deserves the severest—(_As she appears affected, he relaxes in the -severity of his manner._) Yet you were very young, and that almost -excuses you. But how appease his father? - -_Harriet._ I dread to meet him. - -_Poly._ And I too, who must bear the responsibility of all this! But how -did my Charles contrive to make your acquaintance? I watched him so -closely, that— - -_Harriet._ I believe, sir, he bribed the servants to conceal his absence -from home; and whilst you thought he was in his own room, closely -engaged in his studies, he used to— - -_Poly._ The mischievous truant! I’ll trim him for this. I beg pardon; I -forgot I was speaking to you of a husband.—Ah! I can imagine by what -arts he won your affections. He has often delighted me. He solved some -difficult problem in Euclid for you, perhaps—talked Latin to you, eh? or -Greek? - -_Harriet._ Greek, sir! he merely said he loved me. - -_Poly._ Where could he have picked up that! I never taught it him. But I -always said the dear boy was blessed with a natural genius. And so you -have taken advantage of his father’s absence, to get married? - -_Harriet._ No, sir; we have been married these four years. - -_Poly._ Four years! - -_Harriet._ Yet have I often lamented my imprudence. His wife, yet not as -such acknowledged, and exposed to the evil opinion of the inhabitants of -the village, I was at the point of quitting the place, till Charles -could openly avow our union. The departure of his father determined him -to afford me a temporary refuge here, but his unexpected return has—(_A -bell heard._) - -_Poly._ The supper bell! To avoid suspicion, I must leave you, and join -old Mr. Eustace. - -_Harriet._ Leave me! and Charles not here. - -_Poly._ Possibly he is detained by his father. What is to be done? You -must not be seen here, or—(_After some hesitation, and with a profound -sigh_) Ah! there is no other resource. Go into this room; it is mine; -when the family shall have retired for the night, I’ll contrive to let -you out of the house, and you may remain concealed in the village till -we can obtain the sanction of your—your father-in-law. - -_Harriet._ I will do all you desire, sir. - -_Poly._ There, be quick; should you be discovered there, it would be my -ruin. (_He puts her into the room, and as he is speaking to her through -the door, which he holds ajar._) - - _Enter_ MOLLY. - -So, here, take the key and lock the door inside. Be cautious; do not -open the door to any one but me, my little dear; the signal shall be -three taps of the hand. - -_Molly._ Oh, oh! his little dear! - -_Poly._ (_Alarmed._) Who’s there? - -_Molly._ (_Looking slyly at him._) ’Tis I, Mr. Pollypot, and since, for -my misbehaviour, you are resolved to send me away, I come to—But what -was that I heard you say? Were you saying “good bye” to anybody? - -_Poly._ No—I—I was talking to myself. - -_Molly._ Oh! then you are your own little dear. “Don’t open to any one -but me, my little dear.” - -_Poly._ (_Aside._) The little imp has overheard us. - -_Molly._ An’t you ashamed of yourself, Mr. Ignoramus? You preach one -thing and practise another. You would turn away a couple of poor -servants because they love one another honestly, whilst you have a -pretty dear concealed in your apartment. But master is come home now, -and he shall know of this. (_Calls._) Master! master! Mr. Eustace!— - -_Poly._ Molly, Molly, ’tis all a mistake—listen to me— - -_Molly._ No; you had no pity for me just now; so as you said, you shall -find me as flexible as the worst Plutus.—Master!— - -_Poly._ I supplicate—I implore—you shall stay, Molly, you shall stay. - -_Molly._ I stay in a house where there are such doings! No, no. But I’ll -have my revenge on you before I go, I will.—Master! Mr. Charles! all the -house! come all of you! - -_Poly._ He comes! I am ruined—and poor Charles— - - _Enter_ EUSTACE. - -_Eustace._ Why, what is all this noise about? And you, Mr. Polyglot, -didn’t you hear the supper bell? The fish is getting cold, and— - -_Molly._ He doesn’t care about your fish, master; he has fish of his own -to fry, the wicked old sinner. - -_Eustace._ What does the girl mean? - -_Molly._ I mean, master, that if one serpent, as he calls me, is to be -sent out of your house, to let you know that you have another remaining -in it. - -_Poly._ Molly, my dear— - -_Molly._ Don’t whisper me; I’m not to be come over with soft words, that -I can tell you. Here’s Mr. Tutorer, sir, who would turn away a poor lass -for having an honest lover of her own, has got a—I don’t know what, -locked up in his room. - -_Eustace._ Why, how dare you accuse— - -_Molly._ It is true enough, sir; and if it is not a woman, may I never -be married! and I would not swear such a dreadful oath to a fib. - -_Eustace._ A woman! - -_Poly._ (_Aside._) I don’t know whether I am standing on my head or my -heels. - -_Eustace._ Is this true, sir? - -_Poly._ I—you can’t believe—you would not suspect— - -_Molly._ There’s no need to suspect, master, for it is true. ’Tis his -little dear, for I heard him call her so. - -_Eustace._ The girl’s earnestness convinces me there is some truth in -this. Your consternation now—your confusion at my sudden arrival— - -_Poly._ Of course—my—my indignation at such a charge, my— - -_Eustace._ In a word, sir, who have you concealed there? - -_Poly._ I have no one concealed—I—I was talking to Robin, who is there -arranging the—the furniture. (_Aside._) I scarcely know what I say. - -_Molly._ Robin there, is he? - -_Poly._ Leave the room, girl! Is my word to be doubted? - -_Molly._ No, Sir. (_Calls._) Robin! Robin! - - _Enter_ ROBIN, _from the garden_. - -_Robin._ Did you call me? - -_Eustace._ How is this! - -_Poly._ Ruined and undone! - - (_Charles is seen to cross the garden._) - -_Eustace._ What have you to say to this, Sir? - -_Poly._ (_Makes signs to Robin._) He went out the other way, I suppose. - -_Molly._ There is no other way out but the window. - -_Poly._ The window is low, and that’s the way he got out, and now there -is no one else there. (_A noise as of breaking glass is heard in the -room._) - -_Molly._ Dear me! Then the windows are breaking one another! - -_Poly._ I shall faint! pray leave me just now, sir. I feel particularly -unwell. I’ll explain this to your satisfaction to-morrow. - -_Eustace._ I’ll not be trifled with; give me the key. - -_Poly._ Unluckily it is inside, and the door is fastened. - -_Eustace._ No matter; I’ll force it open. - -_Molly._ Stop, master; I have a key. (_Gives three taps with her hand._) - -_Poly._ (_Sinks into a chair._) The little vixen will be the death of -me. - - _Enter from the room_, CHARLES; - _he closes the door hastily after him_. - -_Eustace._ What, Charles! - -_Poly._ (_Aside._) How came he there? - -_Eustace._ What were you doing there? and why did not you come out at -once? - -_Charles._ The fact is, sir, I have been so unfortunate as to displease -my tutor. He has kindly promised to conceal my offence from you, till he -can hope to obtain your pardon for it. I heard your voice in anger, and -dreading the effects of an abrupt disclosure, I— - -_Eustace._ (_To Poly._) So, that was it, after all? - -_Poly._ Yes—after all. - -_Eustace._ And what is his offence? a serious one, no doubt, to require -so much mystery. - -_Charles._ (_To Poly._) Remember your oath. - -_Poly._ For the present I must conceal it. I am bound by an——by a -promise. - -_Eustace._ Well—(_To Molly._) And how dare you, you little hussy, tell -me such a rhodomontade? - -_Molly._ (_Confused._) Why, master,—I only told you what I thought. -(_Aside._) I’ll not give it up yet. - -_Eustace._ Come, Mr. Polyglot, to supper. - -_Poly._ I have no appetite, thank you; and am rather unwell. - -_Molly._ (_Aside._) Guilty conscience. - -_Eustace._ You look ill. Robin shall bring you something into your own -room. - -_Charles._ (_Aside._) And my wife there! - -_Eustace._ Come with me, Charles. Good night Mr. Polyglot: pardon my -suspicion, my worthy friend. (_To Molly._) Do you go to bed, and let me -hear no more of that chattering little tongue of yours to-night. Robin! -go lock the outer doors, bring me the keys, and then take some supper to -Mr. Polyglot. - -_Charles._ (_Aside._) Then there will be no escape for her. - -_Eustace._ Come, Charles, come. - -_Charles._ Remember your promise. (_To Poly._) - - [_Exit._ - -_Molly._ He’s juggling the old gentleman, I’ll lay my life on’t. But -I’ll not sleep till I have found it out. - - [_Exeunt all but_ POLYGLOT. - -_Poly._ Is this a dream! Let me collect my scattered senses. Surely it -cannot be? Married! My pupil who had never, as I thought, even so much -as——O Lord! absolutely married! And I, Ignatius Polyglot, who have led -the life of a hermit, to be suspected! I must not think; I’ll retire to -rest. Heaven knows I have need of it. (_Approaches the door, and hastily -retires._) Bless us and save us! I forgot, she is there! And how am I to -get her away? Hark! They are locking the outer gate. There is now no -hope. - - HARRIET _opens the door gently, and enters_. - -_Harriet._ At length you are alone. Tell me what is now to be done? -Counsel me—advise me. - -_Poly._ Yes, I—how shall I advise you? Advise me what I had best—at any -rate you must not remain here. - -_Harriet._ Where would you have me go? - -_Poly._ Wherever you please, my good young lady; but it is night, you -know—these are my apartments, and after the suspicions that have been -excited against me, I—yet how can I get you away? They have closed the -doors and—but what ails you? - -_Harriet._ Reach me a chair. My agitation for the last hour has so——I am -fainting. - -_Poly._ Don’t think of such a thing—I know not how to help you—’tis not -at all in my way. (_He leads her to a chair; her bonnet falls off._) -This was wanting to complete the pleasures of the evening. My dear -lady—Miss—My kind madam, (_Taps her hand._) If any one should come! She -recovers. Be composed—It occurs to me that I have a key of the little -wicket that leads from the garden to the meadow; that way we may reach -the village. - -_Harriet._ Conduct me where you will. But I must take my dear Frederick -with me. - -_Poly._ Frederick! what’s Frederick? - -_Harriet._ Our darling boy. - -_Poly._ (_Stammering._) And have you a darling boy? - -_Harriet._ He is in the room I have occupied at the end of the garden. - -_Poly._ O Charles! Charles! In love—married—a little boy! Have I any -thing more to learn? tell me at once.—So then, I have been tutor to a -father of a family! - -_Harriet._ I can easily bring him away. (_Going._) - -_Poly._ No; you might be observed. There is but one thing to be done—I -foresee my fate—Since I must be the scape-goat, I’ll fetch him for you. - -_Harriet._ My kind friend! - -_Poly._ I’ll not be gone an instant. (_Noise of footsteps._) Ha! here -comes Robin. Quick—retire. (_She goes towards the room._) No, not there. -He’ll want to go into that room with my supper. There—there. (_He_ -_forces her into the room on the opposite side—a lock heard._) - - _Enter_ ROBIN _and_ MOLLY. - -_Robin._ I have brought your supper, sir. - -_Poly._ Leave it, leave it. And you, Mrs. Molly, what do you want here? -(_Robin takes the tray into the room._) - -_Molly._ (_Slyly_) I came to ask whether I should clear away the broken -glass yonder. Why, now, if there isn’t some conjuration there? You told -Master Eustace the key was inside the door, and see if it hasn’t opened -of itself. (_Aside._) Then I was right after all. - -_Poly._ Ahem! you may go—you may go. - -_Molly._ I hope, sir, you’ll forgive my suspicions. (_Sees the bonnet._) -O, ho! - -_Poly._ Begone I say! and, in future, beware how you accuse an innocent -person. - -_Molly._ Yes, sir, if you please; and I repent it the more, seeing, as I -do, the proofs of your innocence before me. - -_Poly._ Light my lanthorn. (_To Robin, who returns._) I am going to -walk. - -_Robin._ At this time, sir; and in such weather? Why it is pouring of -rain. - -_Poly._ No matter—I—I have a head-ache and want air. Begone! both of -you, and woe be to you if I find either of you here at my return! (_They -go off._) There is not an instant to be lost. The poor innocent baby -must not become a victim to the old man’s displeasure; and if he should -reach the pavilion before me—Into what a labyrinth has my affection for -my pupil led me! - - [_Exit._ - - _Enter_ MOLLY, _cautiously_; ROBIN _following_. - -_Molly._ Robin, run and tell old Master Eustace to come here -immediately. - -_Robin._ Why, what would you be at now? - -_Molly._ She’s here; I’m sure of it. - -_Robin._ Who’s here? - -_Molly._ Mr. Ignoramus’s Miss. - -_Robin._ I’ll not go and tell master any such thing. You know you have -got into one scrape already this evening by telling a fib. - -_Molly._ But this time I have proof positive. (_Takes up the bonnet._) -Look here. - -_Robin._ Why, that does look rather queer, to be sure. But what does -that signify? Depend upon it, she’s gone. - -_Molly._ How can that be? Haven’t I been watching outside? Besides, the -gates are locked. - -_Robin._ Where can she be then? - -_Molly._ There! I hear her move. Run, quick; fetch master. - -_Robin._ And yet I don’t like to tell upon old tutorer, neither. - -_Molly._ Wouldn’t he have told upon us? But we’ll let master see what a -sly old fox he has got in his house. Go, I tell you. (_Forces him off._) -Now, Mr. Pollypot, I’ll teach you something better than Greek, I will. -Ah! here comes Mr. Charles. He’ll be delighted at this, for the tutorer -leads the poor lad such a life, that he’ll be glad enough to get quit of -him, I warrant me. - - _Enter_ CHARLES, _from garden_. - -_Charles._ My anxiety is insupportable; and at all risks I must——Why, -Molly, what do you want here? - -_Molly._ O, sir, I have such news for you! You are the only one in the -house who is kind to me, and now I’ll prove my gratitude. I’ll soon get -the tutorer turned away, and make you your own master. - -_Charles._ What do you mean? - -_Molly._ I have discovered it at last. She is here after all. - -_Charles._ Is the girl out of her senses? - -_Molly._ No, no; here’s proof! here’s the creature’s bonnet; and I’ve -sent Robin to bring your father here. - -_Charles._ Sent for my father! Unhappy girl, what have you done! - -_Molly._ Lord, Mr. Charles, what ails you? - -_Charles._ Alas! you know not the mischief you have effected. ’Tis not -he who is to blame; he has interfered but to serve me: the lady, who is -here concealed, is my wife. - -_Molly._ (_With mingled astonishment and grief._) Your wife! - -_Charles._ This precipitate disclosure has rendered abortive our hopes -of obtaining pardon from my father. Your malicious curiosity has -destroyed the happiness of us all. - -_Molly._ (_Bursting into tears._) O, Mr. Charles, indeed, indeed, if I -had but known——you, who are so good, so kind——. But dont’ee grieve, -dont’ee now. I’ll die rather than harm you.—I’ll take all the blame upon -myself.—There may yet be time; I’ll run and stop Robin. (_Going._) - -_Robin._ (_Without._) This way, sir, this way. - -_Molly._ O, I am indeed an unhappy girl. But, Mr. Charles, dear Mr. -Charles, dont’ee be downcast. Leave it to me, I’ll get you through, -though I lose my place, I will. (_Hastily wipes her eyes, and assumes an -air of composure._) - - _Enter_ EUSTACE (_in his dressing gown_) _preceded by_ ROBIN. - -_Robin._ Yes, sir, Molly says you may now be convinced. - -_Eustace._ So. You here, Charles? - -_Charles._ Yes, sir, I—I heard a noise, and was fearful—— - -_Eustace._ ’Tis well; stay where you are: the scene you are about to -witness will serve you as a lesson which may last you your life. (_To -Robin and Molly._) As for you, if you have called me out of my bed by -another such a rigmarole as the last,—— - -_Robin._ O, no, sir, it is all sure enough this time. (_To Molly, who -makes signs to him._) I had trouble enough to persuade master, but he is -come at last, you see. - -_Molly._ Well, and what for? - -_Robin._ What for! Why, to be sure, you know well enough. The lady, you -know. - -_Molly._ What lady? What is the simpleton talking about? - -_Robin._ Why the lady that is concealed here. - -_Molly._ Robin, you have been at the ale-barrel. - -_Robin._ O, the little gipsey! Didn’t you tell me,— - -_Molly._ No, it isn’t true. - -_Robin._ Well, hang me but——. And I suppose you’ll say you didn’t send -me to bring master. - -_Molly._ To be sure I will, for it’s false. - -_Robin._ And that bonnet— - -_Molly._ (_Putting it on._) It is mine. Master, there ben’t a true word -in all he is telling you. (_Pinches his arm._) Can’t you hold your -tongue. - -_Robin._ Oh!—that isn’t the way to make me. Master, I say again—— - -_Molly._ And I say, Master,—— - -_Eustace._ Hold your tongues, both of you. There is some mystery here. -The evident alarm of that girl—(_To Molly, who is about to speak._) -Silence! (_Takes a candle, and looks into the room at the left hand._) - -_Charles._ I almost sink with dread. - -_Molly._ (_To Robin._) I’ve a great mind never to marry you for this. - -_Eustace._ (_Returns._) No one there. (_Goes to the opposite door._) The -door is locked. (_Gives three taps._) - -_Harriet._ (_Within._) Is that my kind protector? - -_Eustace._ (_Staggering away._) Her kind protector! ’Tis but too true, -then! The old hypocrite! thus to deceive me and dishonour my house! The -monster shall instantly quit it, and for ever. Hush! some one -approaches! ’tis he: silence, I command. (_He extinguishes the lights._) - - _Enter_ POLYGLOT, _with his dark lanthorn; Master_ FREDERICK _is - concealed under his cloak. He goes directly, but cautiously, to the - door_. - -_Poly._ (_In an under tone._) Open—open quickly—’tis I. I have secured -our precious charge. Now, quick; let us away, or we may be interrupted -by old Argus. - - _Enter_ HARRIET. - -_Eustace._ You are right, for old Argus has you. - -_Harriet._ O, heavens! I’m lost! (_Robin lights the candles._) - -_Eustace._ No, madam, you are found. And you! Is it thus you repay the -confidence I have reposed in you? Are you the man I have selected as a -guide, as a monitor to my son? A female concealed in your apartment! - -_Charles._ My dear father, I must no longer allow— - -_Eustace._ Peace! And what is it you are endeavouring to hide there? - -_Poly._ Nothing—a mere trifle. - -_Eustace._ I insist upon knowing. (_Draws open his cloak and discovers -Master Frederick._) You call this a trifle do you? - -_Harriet._ (_Running towards him._) My Frederick! my child! - -_Eustace._ O!—Now what have you to say for yourself? - -_Poly._ That it _is_ a Frederick—a child I mean,—I confess; but suffer -me to explain, and—— - -_Eustace._ Explanation is needless: your—mere trifle—explains itself. -And yet I would hope you are not the monster you appear. Answer me one -question: Is the lady your wife? - -_Poly._ No, no; yet if you would only—— - -_Eustace._ The unblushing sinner! Then, will you marry her? - -_Poly._ (_To Charles._) I have done and suffered much to serve you: I -can’t do that, you know. - -_Eustace._ Do you hesitate? - -_Charles._ Will you but listen to me, sir? - -_Eustace._ No, I will listen to but one thing only. (_To Poly._) When a -man has committed an error, is it not his first duty to do what he can -to repair it? - -_Poly._ Granted. - -_Eustace._ To restore her respectability to the woman he has betrayed? - -_Poly._ Granted. - -_Eustace._ To protect and bestow his name upon his child. - -_Poly._ Granted. (_To Charles, who is about to interrupt him._) Further -concealment is impossible. (_To Eustace._) But suppose his family should -refuse—— - -_Eustace._ Refuse! In such a case, no honest member of it would refuse -to sanction the union; if he did, he would share in the guilt of the -offender. - -_Poly._ I am quite of your opinion. - -_Eustace._ Then why hesitate? - -_Poly._ The lady is already married; but if you would just have the -kindness to repeat to your son all you have said to me—— - -_Eustace._ My son! - -_Charles._ Yes, sir; we throw ourselves at your feet, and implore your -pardon. This lady is my wife. - -_Eustace._ How! married! without consulting me! Leave me, ungrateful -boy! - -_Charles._ Will not the choice I have made procure your forgiveness, -sir! - -_Poly._ Let me intercede for them. Remember the lecture you have just -delivered to me. Practice what you preach. Besides, you can’t unmarry -them, you know. - -_Eustace._ And when I had another scheme in view for him? - -_Poly._ It is all as it should be. You wished him to marry—what can it -signify?—there he is, without farther ado, ready married to your hands. - -_Robin._ You save the trouble and expense of a wedding. - -_Harriet._ You have a daughter who will love you. - -_Molly._ And a little grandson ready made, master. - -_Eustace._ But the example—— - -_Molly._ ’Tis a good one, master; and, if you please, Robin and I will -follow it. - -_Eustace._ Well—well—since it is so: but there is a little urchin who, I -foresee, will one of these days play us a similar trick. - -_Poly._ Never fear: place him under my care—you know me; and I give him -twenty years’ notice, that if he too should attempt to elude my -vigilance—Ah me! as I have done for the father, so shall I doubtless be -induced to do for the son; and I trust to your indulgence for my -re-appearance in the character of—SCAPE-GOAT. - - - THE END. - - - - - Transcriber’s Notes - - - Printed Changed to Page - Mr, Mr. 5 Where’s Mr. Ignoramus, - to 12 _Whispers to Polyglot._ - Your’s Yours 16 been placed? Yours. - Your’s Yours 16 my conduct? Yours. - Your’s Yours 16 secret marriage? Yours. - mischevous mischievous 18 _Poly._ The mischievous truant! - hussey hussy 22 you little hussy, - expence expense 31 expense of a wedding - ajar, ajar. 19 _he holds ajar._ - Aside Aside. 21 (_Aside._) I scarcely know - satistion satisfaction 22 explain this to your satisfaction - your’s yours 23 tongue of yours to-night. - Molly, Molly. 26 _Molly._ Mr. Ignoramus’s Miss. - positive, positive. 26 I have proof positive. - Without Without. 27 _Robin._ (_Without._) This way, - door door. 28 _opposite door._) The door is locked. - Eustace, Eustace. 30 _Eustace._ No, I will listen - Eustace Eustace. 30 _Eustace._) But suppose his family - -Other Changes:- - -Italicized words and phrases are presented by surrounding the text with -underscores and small caps are all uppercase. - - - - - -End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Scape-Goat, by John Poole - -*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE SCAPE-GOAT *** - -***** This file should be named 52717-0.txt or 52717-0.zip ***** -This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: - http://www.gutenberg.org/5/2/7/1/52717/ - -Produced by David Edwards, readbueno and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This -file was produced from images generously made available -by The Internet Archive) - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will -be renamed. - -Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright -law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, -so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United -States without permission and without paying copyright -royalties. 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You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of -the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at -www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have -to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook. - -Title: The Scape-Goat - A Farce in One Act - -Author: John Poole - -Release Date: August 4, 2016 [EBook #52717] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: UTF-8 - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE SCAPE-GOAT *** - - - - -Produced by David Edwards, readbueno and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This -file was produced from images generously made available -by The Internet Archive) - - - - - - -</pre> - - -<div class='figcenter id001'> -<img src='images/cover.jpg' alt='' class='ig001' /> -<div class='ic001'> -<p>This cover was produced by the Transcriber<br />and is in the public domain.</p> -</div> -</div> -<div class='pbb'> - <hr class='pb c000' /> -</div> -<div> - <span class='pageno' id='Page_i'>i</span> - <h1 class='c001'>The Scape-Goat<br /> <br />A Farce in One Act</h1> -</div> - -<div class='nf-center-c1'> -<div class='nf-center c002'> - <div>THE</div> - <div class='c000'><span class='c003'>SCAPE-GOAT;</span></div> - <div class='c000'>A FARCE,</div> - <div class='c000'><span class='c004'>IN ONE ACT,</span></div> - <div class='c002'>PERFORMED, FOR THE FIRST TIME, ON FRIDAY, NOVEMBER 25, 1825,</div> - <div class='c000'><span class='small'>AT THE</span></div> - <div class='c000'><span class='c005'>THEATRE ROYAL, COVENT GARDEN.</span></div> - <div class='c000'><span class='c006'><span class='sc'>By JOHN POOLE, Esq.</span></span></div> - <div class='c000'><span class='sc'>Author of “PAUL PRY,” “TRIBULATION,” “MARRIED and SINGLE,”</span></div> - <div><span class='sc'>“SIMPSON and Co.” &c. &c.</span></div> - <div class='c002'><span class='c007'>LONDON:</span></div> - <div class='c000'><span class='sc'>Published by SHERWOOD, GILBERT, and PIPER, Paternoster Row.</span></div> - <div class='c002'><span class='c005'>1826.</span></div> - <div class='c000'><span class='c007'><i>Price Eighteen-Pence.</i></span></div> - </div> -</div> - -<div class='pbb'> - <hr class='pb c000' /> -</div> - -<div class='nf-center-c1'> -<div class='nf-center c008'> - <div><span class='pageno' id='Page_ii'>ii</span><span class='xsmall'>Gye and Balne, Printers, Gracechurch-Street.</span></div> - </div> -</div> - -<div class='pbb'> - <hr class='pb c000' /> -</div> - -<div class='nf-center-c1'> -<div class='nf-center c009'> - <div><span class='pageno' id='Page_iii'>iii</span>⁂ A French Piece, called “<i><span lang="fr" xml:lang="fr">Le Precepteur dans l’embarras</span></i>,”</div> - <div>furnished the ground-work of the following Farce.</div> - </div> -</div> - -<div class='pbb'> - <hr class='pb c000' /> -</div> -<div class='chapter'> - <span class='pageno' id='Page_iv'>iv</span> - <h2 class='c010'>DRAMATIS PERSONÆ.</h2> -</div> -<table class='table0' summary=''> - <tr> - <td class='c011'><i>Old Eustace</i></td> - <td class='c012'><span class='sc'>Mr. Blanchard</span>.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'><i>Charles</i>, (<i>his son</i>)</td> - <td class='c012'><span class='sc'>Mr. Cooper</span>.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'><i>Ignatius Polyglot</i></td> - <td class='c012'><span class='sc'>Mr. W. Farren</span>.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'><i>Robin</i></td> - <td class='c012'><span class='sc'>Mr. Meadows</span>.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'><i>Master Frederick</i></td> - <td class='c012'> </td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'> </td> - <td class='c012'> </td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'><i>Harriet</i></td> - <td class='c012'><span class='sc'>Miss A. Jones</span>.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'><i>Molly Maggs</i></td> - <td class='c012'><span class='sc'>Miss Jones</span>.</td> - </tr> -</table> -<div class='pbb'> - <hr class='pb c000' /> -</div> -<div class='chapter'> - <span class='pageno' id='Page_5'>5</span> - <h2 class='c010'>THE SCAPE-GOAT.</h2> -</div> -<p class='c013'><span class='sc'>Scene</span>—<i>Polyglot’s study. A door on each side, conducting -to other apartments. An opening to the -garden, at the back of the stage. Another door -leading to the interior of the house. Globes, books, -maps, &c. are scattered about.</i></p> - -<div class='nf-center-c1'> - <div class='nf-center'> - <div><span class='sc'>Robin</span> <i>discovered, turning a globe</i>.</div> - </div> -</div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> ’Tis an extraordinary thing, that, do what I -will, I can’t make myself sensible. I turn the world -topsy-turvy for hours together, as I see my young -master, Mr. Charles, do; like Mr. Ignatius Polyglot, -his tutor, I sometimes look into a book full of Greek or -Latin; but all to no purpose. Ah! Mr. Polyglot must -be in the right: he can’t bear the sight of a woman in -the house, for fear Mr. Charles should fall in love, and -neglect his studies; and, for my part, I’m sure that, if -all the Greek I have got in my pocket (<i>shewing a book</i>) -were cramm’d into my head, one thought of my sweet -little Somersetshire lass, Molly Maggs, would drive it -out again.</p> - -<div class='nf-center-c0'> - <div class='nf-center'> - <div><i>Enter</i> <span class='sc'>Molly Maggs</span>, <i>from the Garden</i>.</div> - </div> -</div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> Hist! hist! Robin!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> What! my dear Molly! You may come in.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> I’m afeard, Robin.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> There’s nothing to be afraid of just now.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> Where’s Mr<a id='tn005'></a>. Ignoramus, the tutorer, then?</p> - -<p class='c014'><span class='pageno' id='Page_6'>6</span><i>Robin.</i> Mr. Ignatius you mean. He’s out, taking -his evening’s walk.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> Be he? I hope he be gone down towards the -little bridge.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> Why?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> The last time he went that way, he were so -busy at what he called soldering a problem, that he -stumbled over into the brook. If I had been in your -place, Robin, before I pulled him out again I’d ha’ -made him promise to consent to our marriage, or I’d -ha’ let him bide there till doomsday.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> Molly, Molly, you don’t like Mr. Polyglot.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> Why don’t he like me then?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> It is not you alone, but he would dislike any -other young maiden about the house the same.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> And what for? there’s no reason in that. -Am I to blame? I’m sure ’tis no fault of mine, Robin, -that I’m a young maiden. Ha! ha! ha! A pretty -to-do there’d be if he should catch me here—in his -own apartments too!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> So there would. I tremble to think of it; -and so, Molly, you’d better—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> I don’t care: if he says any thing to me, I’ll -give him his own. Besides, our master, old Master -Eustace, will be home in a few days, and we’ll ask his -leave to be married, in spite of old tutorer.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> No, no, we must not displease him; he’s -steward as well as tutorer, and—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> He’ll discharge us? let him. I’m not afeard -of wanting a service. I have relations who are up in -the world. I’m first cousin to Sally Maggs, who is -head chambermaid at the Bell, at Winchester—Chattering -Sally, as they call her, and well they may, for -she is chatter, chatter, chatter—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> In that respect, Molly, you don’t disgrace -the relationship.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> Discharge us, indeed! the sooner the better; -<span class='pageno' id='Page_7'>7</span>we may then get married when we please. What -does the foolish old chap mean by not liking folks to -marry? I wish his father had been of the same mind, -and then Mr. Ignoramus would not have been here to -torment us.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> Well, well, though he is a little crabbed -and sour, he’s a good old soul at bottom. He’d go -through fire and water to serve young Master Charles.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> With a vengeance! Poor young gentleman! -he’s grown as melancholy as a willow tree: and no -wonder: at four-and-twenty to be kept in leading-strings -like a baby! But no good will come of it, see -if there do; and I wish that Master Charles would -give him the slip one of these days, on purpose to -plague him. O, if I could but catch the old one -doing any thing amiss—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> Think kindlier of him, Molly; we’ll wait -till we find him in a good humour, and then perhaps—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> If we wait till then, Robin, you need be in -no hurry to buy the wedding ring. Well, I’ll go.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> Do; for after all ’twould do no good to -anger him. And, Lord! if he were to see us here -together!-Well, good bye, my dear Molly.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> Good bye, Robin! (<i>loitering</i>) Good bye, -Robin!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> (<i>Kisses her</i>) Bless your little heart!</p> - -<div class='nf-center-c0'> - <div class='nf-center'> - <div><i>Enter, from the garden</i>, <span class='sc'>Ignatius Polyglot</span>,</div> - <div><i>with a book</i>. <span class='sc'>Robin</span> <i>runs off</i>.</div> - </div> -</div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> O, crimini!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> What do I behold! Under my nose! my -very nose! here too! in my study, the sanctuary of -science and of learning!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> Well, if nothing worse was ever learnt here, -Mr. Ignoramus—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Ignatius.—But what atonement can you make -for this?</p> - -<p class='c014'><span class='pageno' id='Page_8'>8</span><i>Molly.</i> Atonement! I’ve done nothing to atone for.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Nothing! Do you call that nothing? Did I -not see? Did I not hear? Nothing! <i>O tem</i>—but you -don’t understand Latin.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> Latin, indeed! no, nor Greek neither; and -I’m sure ’tis all Greek you are talking to me. What -did you see? what did you hear? You heard Robin -say good bye, that was all.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Peace! I’m a linguist, and in none of the -seventeen languages I’m acquainted with, does that -mean good bye.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> Then I wouldn’t give seventeen figs to be -as learned as you are, and your seventeen languages -are not worth talking.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> To what is the poor youth exposed! Mischief! -Serpent! Woman! I pity, and tremble for, the unfortunate -lad.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> ’Tis a misfortune not likely to happen to you.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> But ’tis I alone who am to blame. I ought -not to have allowed one of the deluding sex to approach -those innocent and unsuspecting youths. Had my -pupil, Charles, beheld this, it might have put things -into his head, which—But there will yet be time to -save them. To-morrow, at day-break, you will quit -this house.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> Nay, and you wouldn’t be so cruel, Mr. -Poll-parrot.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Polyglot.—I have said it; reply not.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> I have not done any harm, and I’m sure I -did not think any harm. ’Tis no fault of mine if -Robin is in love with me: he fell in love of his own -accord, indeed he did.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Love! (<i>looks fearfully about.</i>) Silence!—If -Charles should hear that dangerous word—Retire—Withdraw—begone.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> (<i>Bursting into tears.</i>) O dearee me! Pray, -good, kind Mr. Ignoramus, forgive me this once. -<span class='pageno' id='Page_9'>9</span>Would you have it upon your conscience to turn a -poor lass out of her service, and send her upon the -wide world without a friend to protect her? Would’ee -now, Mr. Ignoramus, would’ee?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Go away, my dear, and—No, I will not give -way to the weakness of our common nature, but prove -myself, in the discharge of my duty, inflexible as the -first Brutus!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> And well you may call him so, if he was as -stony-hearted as you are. Will you forgive me?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> No!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> You won’t? Nay, then, I’ll tell you a bit -of my mind; I’ll do that, an’ I die for it. For all your -grave looks, I’ll be sworn you are no better than your -neighbours; I know you arn’t. I’ll pass my days in -watching you, I will; and if ever I catch you saying -“good bye,” as I know I shall, then, when you are in -trouble, and in need of indulgence, you shall find me -as pityless as yourself. There; carry that bundle -upon your shoulders, and now—I’ll go and pack up -mine.</p> - -<div class='c015'>[<i>Exit.</i></div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> The little serpent! Her tears, her imploring -looks, had well nigh—But I must be firm: I see the -danger, and must protect my pupil against the snares -of these pernicious creatures. Poor lad! he is innocent, -and knows not the seductive power of love. My -example and instructions have so fortified his mind, so -hardened his heart against all silly, soft impressions, -that, thanks to me, he may hope to pass through life -as becomes a philosopher—in a happy indifference to -all its joys, its pleasures, and its cares. He comes!—My -dear disciple!</p> - -<div class='nf-center-c0'> - <div class='nf-center'> - <div><i>Enter</i> <span class='sc'>Charles</span>, <i>in violent agitation</i>.</div> - </div> -</div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> My dear sir, I’m glad you are returned.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Your impatience pleases me. Come, is it -to be Sophocles this evening?</p> - -<p class='c014'><span class='pageno' id='Page_10'>10</span><i>Charles.</i> No:—it is not that, sir,—but—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Well, well; we must sometimes relax,—make -holiday; so, instead of Sophocles, we’ll amuse ourselves -with a problem in Euclid.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> Confound Euclid! as he has often confounded -me. No, sir; I—in short, you see me in the -greatest distress.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> In distress! You alarm me! My dear boy, -my dear child, what is the matter?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> My father is returning; he is now galloping -up the avenue, and I see no refuge from my difficulties -but in death.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Mercy on me! what do you mean? No -refuge but in—and in his father’s absence too! Consider, -that for all that concerns you, I am responsible. -Wait, at least, till he arrives, and—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> No, I am resolved; the matter is pressing, -and there’s no time for deliberation.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> And he has not half finished his studies! -(<i>Rushes into his arms</i>) Charles—my dear boy—be composed—look -at me—who am I? have I not been your -guide, your protector, your friend, since the hour you -were born. You know I love you; that there is nothing -on earth I would not do to see you happy; tell -me, then, what it is afflicts you.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> You will betray me to my father, and I -dread his displeasure worse than death.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Betray you! Never; be it what it may.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> Swear!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> I never swear.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> Swear, or this instant will I—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Hold! your danger inspires me with the -devotion of an antique Roman: I swear, (<i>raising his -hand</i>) <i>Per Jovem!</i> By Jupiter! I swear.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> Enough! I will trust you. (<i>Aside</i>) And -yet I dare not tell him the whole.—I—I am in love.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> O, horror! In love! ’Tis epidemic—’tis running -<span class='pageno' id='Page_11'>11</span>through the house! Robin, Molly, and now—How, -sir! and at your age, only just turned of four-and-twenty; -the thing is incredible, and—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> Do but hear me, sir.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> In love! it cannot be: why, he has Greek, -Latin, algebra, and mathematics at his finger’s ends. -And is this the termination of my hopes? You, whom -I destined for a philosopher; you, whose name I -fondly hoped to see placed side by side with the glorious -names of Archimedes and Aristotle! Did love -find out the square of the hypothenuse? Did love—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> O, sir, if the bare avowal of my affection -so displease you, what will you say when I confess to -you that—but here comes my father. (<i>Aside.</i>) Where -shall I conceal my dear Harriet?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Be composed; he must not observe our -agitation.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> Remember your promise, or I’ll keep -mine. Pop!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> My dear boy I’ll not betray you, I—Oh!</p> - -<div class='nf-center-c0'> - <div class='nf-center'> - <div><i>Enter</i> <span class='sc'>Old Eustace</span>, <i>followed by</i> <span class='sc'>Robin</span>, <i>to whom he gives his great-coat, hat and whip</i>.</div> - </div> -</div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> Charles, my boy, I’m glad to see you. -Mr. Polyglot, my worthy friend, your hand. You did -not expect to see me so soon.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> No, sir, we—we didn’t expect you till last -week.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> Till next week, you mean. The truth is, -I was willing to take you by surprise, and see how -things had been managed during my absence; but I -might have spared myself the trouble. You, Mr. -Polyglot, have the superintendance of my servants, -and are accountable for their conduct;—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> Don’t tell about Molly and me, sir. (<i>Aside -to Polyglot.</i>)</p> - -<p class='c014'><span class='pageno' id='Page_12'>12</span><i>Eustace.</i> My son is under your especial care and -observance;—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> Remember! (<i>Aside to Polyglot.</i>)</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> And so perfect is my reliance on your -attention, prudence, and wisdom, that I am persuaded -you have nothing to relate of what has passed in the -house that will not receive my fullest approbation.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Yes—no—certainly.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> Well, Charles, my arrival must not interrupt -your studies; retire to your own room till supper -is ready. Mr. Polyglot, I have something of importance -to communicate to you. Robin, desire the cook -to be expeditious; my ride has given me an appetite: -and do you put lights into my study: after supper, I -shall be occupied there for an hour or two.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> (<i>Stops Robin as he is going off.</i>) What, -sir! the pavilion at the end of the garden?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> Ay, I have no other.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> You had better not go there to-night, sir; -’tis damp, and—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> Damp? nonsense! Robin, do as I desire.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> (<i>Aside.</i>) ’Tis there I have concealed her. -There is not a moment to be lost.</p> - -<div class='c015'>[<i>Exit.</i></div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> (<i>Whispers <a id='tn012'></a>to Polyglot.</i>) Be kind to -poor Molly, and forgive her, sir.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> (<i>Lost in thought.</i>) No, Molly—yes, Robin, yes.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> Thankye, sir; it shall never happen again.</p> - -<div class='c015'>[<i>Exit.</i></div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> Why, what is the meaning of all this? -Tell me, Mr. Polyglot, what is the matter here? This -confusion, and whispering!—Surely my sudden arrival -cannot have occasioned any inconvenience. I expected -to see you all delighted, and you receive me with faces -as long as my arm.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Uncommonly long! uncommonly long!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> (<i>Aside.</i>) I perceive: the philosopher is in -one of his fits of abstraction.—But there is an air of -<span class='pageno' id='Page_13'>13</span>restraint about Charles, for which I am at a loss to -account. Has he done any thing to provoke your -displeasure?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> (<i>Aside.</i>) I dare not inform him.—No, no—a -trifle.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> You are right to be severe with him: he -is now arrived at an age when the strictest watchfulness -over his conduct is necessary. Ah! Mr. Polyglot, -your example has made him what he is; your vigilance -must keep him so.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> I—you flatter me.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> I will now, in few words, confide to you -the object of the journey from which I have just returned: -it was to make arrangements for the marriage -of my son.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> His marriage!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> I anticipate your objection, and will -answer it.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> I have no objection to offer. (<i>Aside.</i>) Then -it turns out as it should be. Charles is already in love; -so the marriage comes opportunely.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> No objection! Why, till now, you have -always held that no man ought to marry till he’s sixty; -that is to say, till he has finished his education, and -seen a little of the world.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> You make a slight mistake; I always said, -at least I meant to say, four-and-twenty.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> Well, I’m glad it is so; for, to say the -truth, although I am of your opinion, that it is not -prudent to marry whilst a mere baby, yet I always -thought sixty somewhat of the latest.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Ay, ay, for a young man it is, but—(<i>Aside</i>) -What a relief is this to my mind! How happy this -will make my dear boy!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> I’m delighted to find you are of my -opinion. Next week I’ll take Charles to town with -me; he shall see the young lady; I do not mean to -<span class='pageno' id='Page_14'>14</span>control his choice; but if he like her, and she like -him, they shall marry instantly.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Like her! my dear sir, I’m happy to tell you -that he is already in—(<i>Aside.</i>) My oath—<i>per Jovem!</i></p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> Come, Mr. Polyglot, follow me to the -supper room; we’ll talk further of this. I can never -repay you, my good friend, for your care of my son. -As I said before, your example has made him what he -is: for his virtues he is indebted to you; and, were it -possible he could be guilty of any crime or folly, so -completely is he under your guidance, that I should -hold you more to blame than him.</p> - -<div class='c015'>[<i>Exit.</i></div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> What a fortunate turn has this affair taken! -Since he is in love, he must naturally be anxious to -marry. Yet he did not tell me with whom he is in -love. I do not pretend to understand those matters; -but I presume that, being in love, he wants a wife, -and—Oh! there can’t be a doubt of it; so long as he -get a wife, surely it can’t signify who. He comes; -I’ll communicate the joyful tidings to him.</p> - -<div class='nf-center-c0'> - <div class='nf-center'> - <div><i>Enter</i> <span class='sc'>Charles</span>, <i>in violent agitation</i>.</div> - </div> -</div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> I have been anxiously waiting the departure -of my father.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> My dear boy, quiet your apprehensions; ’tis -all right.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> ’Tis all wrong, and fifty times worse than -before.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> What mean you?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> The unexpected arrival of my father has -thrown me into a difficulty scarcely surmountable. -Alas! you know but half my unhappy story.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> I hope then it is the worst half, for really I -have suffered—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> I tremble to avow to you the full extent of -my folly, and yet I dare no longer conceal any circumstance -<span class='pageno' id='Page_15'>15</span>of it from you. The urgency of our situation, -the danger that awaits us—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Come, come, courage; tell me all.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> Know then, that having become acquainted -with a young lady, the orphan daughter of an officer -in the army, I grew enamoured of her, was assiduous -in my attentions to her, succeeded in winning her -affections, and finally—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Eh? What!—say no more—Oh! Charles, -Charles—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> Do but hear me to the end of my story.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> I have heard too much already. And are these -the fruits of my instructions? Is it by such wickedness -you repay my anxious care of you?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> You mistake me, sir; if you would but -listen—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Never expect from me either pardon or indulgence. -Had you indeed formed such a bond of union -as might without a blush have been acknowledged, it -is possible I might—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> What, sir! would you have sanctioned -our marriage? Obtained for us my father’s pardon, his -approbation?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> In that case, perhaps, I would have interfered -in your behalf; for marriage is a sacred contract, and -must be respected: but, as it is—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> (<i>Joyfully.</i>) Then my worthy Mentor, my -best of friends, be comforted: I <i>am</i> married.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> (<i>Struck with astonishment.</i>) Married!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> I am, I am. Marriage, as you say, is a -sacred contract; and, by your own shewing, you are -bound to assist us.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Married! So vigilant as I have been, yet has -he contrived to—I must at once reveal this to your -father. (<i>Going.</i>)</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> And your oath!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Oh!</p> - -<p class='c014'><span class='pageno' id='Page_16'>16</span><i>Charles.</i> Betray me, and my life, my dear wife’s -too, may become a sacrifice. But no, you will not; -for your own sake, you dare not. Upon you alone will -fall the blame.—Under whose especial care have I -been placed? <a id='tn016'></a>Yours. Whose duty was it to watch -over my conduct? <a id='tn016-2'></a>Yours. Whose vigilance was at -fault when I could contrive a secret marriage? <a id='tn016-3'></a>Yours. -My father has made you responsible for my actions: -<i>ergo</i>: it is against you alone that my father will -manifest his displeasure at my misconduct.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> (<i>His countenance gradually betraying his -satisfaction.</i>) The dear boy! He is indebted to me -for his logic. Aristotle himself would have been proud -of such a pupil. That’s something like conducting an -argument. I have not a word to reply.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> But there is no time to be lost; you must -at once decide. If you consent to protect us, we shall -for ever consider you our friend—our saviour. You -shall pass your days with us; we will be a comfort to -your age; our children shall thank you; and, as you -moulded their father’s mind, so shall you give the bent -to their’s.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> My dear Charles, I will encounter anything -for your sake: whatever may befal me, I swear not to -betray your interests. This will be a sad disappointment -to your father. You must allow me a few days -to consider the best mode of breaking the affair to him. -But where have you left your—it was only this morning -I rapped his knuckles for a false quantity—your wife?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> Left her? She’s here!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> What, here! in the house?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> In my father’s study, in the garden. Taking -advantage of his absence, I have, for many days, concealed -her there; but his sudden return compels me to -seek some other retreat for her. Aided by the growing -darkness, I have removed her. She is waiting there in -the garden. I will confide her to your care.</p> - -<p class='c014'><span class='pageno' id='Page_17'>17</span><i>Poly.</i> Hold, hold! Confide a woman to my care!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> Ay; your apartment is the most secure. -No one will suspect that a female is concealed there. -(<i>Runs towards the garden.</i>) Harriet, Harriet! This -way.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> (<i>In great consternation.</i>) Stay—what would -you do? Should she be discovered here, I’m ruined, -undone!—Oh! she’s here!</p> - -<div class='nf-center-c0'> - <div class='nf-center'> - <div><i>Enter</i> <span class='sc'>Harriet</span>.</div> - </div> -</div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> Fear nothing, my darling love; this is our -best friend.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Harriet.</i> In what terms can we express our gratitude, -sir?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Indeed, miss—mistress—my good lady, I—my -head is turning—But, tell me, Charles, how did -you contrive, without my knowledge, to—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> My wife will explain all to you. In the -mean time I’ll keep watch without. Should my father -take us by surprise, all will be lost. My good, kind -friend, I confide to your care all I value in the world—my -own dear Harriet.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Why—why—you would not leave me alone -with her?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> (<i>Not attending to him.</i>) Be composed, -love; all will be well.</p> - -<div class='c015'>[<i>Exit.</i></div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Charles, Charles! Don’t leave me alone with her.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Harriet.</i> Once more, sir, let me thank you for your -kindness.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> (<i>Avoiding her.</i>) Thank me, indeed! Oh! if -you knew—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Harriet.</i> But why that angry look? Would you -abandon us? In your friendship, and my husband’s -love, is now my only hope.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> What touching accents! I never before—’Twas -with tones like these the serpent must have -seduced my poor innocent boy. (<i>Severely.</i>) It is my -<span class='pageno' id='Page_18'>18</span>duty, miss—my duty, madam, to remind you that the step -you have taken is—(<i>She looks abashed.</i>)—Not that I -would say anything to give you pain, but—tell me who -you are, my dear.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Harriet.</i> The daughter of Colonel Mowbray, who, -dying five years ago, left me without fortune, without -friends, without a protector. I sought an asylum in the -neighbouring village, and soon afterwards became acquainted -with Mr. Eustace. You know his worth, and -can you wonder if—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Poor thing! Well, don’t weep, my dear; -your cares will soon be at an end. Not but that so imprudent -a step as a clandestine marriage deserves the -severest—(<i>As she appears affected, he relaxes in the -severity of his manner.</i>) Yet you were very young, -and that almost excuses you. But how appease his -father?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Harriet.</i> I dread to meet him.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> And I too, who must bear the responsibility -of all this! But how did my Charles contrive to make -your acquaintance? I watched him so closely, that—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Harriet.</i> I believe, sir, he bribed the servants to -conceal his absence from home; and whilst you thought -he was in his own room, closely engaged in his studies, -he used to—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> The mischievous<a id='tn018'></a> truant! I’ll trim him for -this. I beg pardon; I forgot I was speaking to you of -a husband.—Ah! I can imagine by what arts he won -your affections. He has often delighted me. He solved -some difficult problem in Euclid for you, perhaps—talked -Latin to you, eh? or Greek?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Harriet.</i> Greek, sir! he merely said he loved me.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Where could he have picked up that! I never -taught it him. But I always said the dear boy was -blessed with a natural genius. And so you have -taken advantage of his father’s absence, to get -married?</p> - -<p class='c014'><span class='pageno' id='Page_19'>19</span><i>Harriet.</i> No, sir; we have been married these four -years.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Four years!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Harriet.</i> Yet have I often lamented my imprudence. -His wife, yet not as such acknowledged, and exposed -to the evil opinion of the inhabitants of the village, I -was at the point of quitting the place, till Charles -could openly avow our union. The departure of his -father determined him to afford me a temporary refuge -here, but his unexpected return has—(<i>A bell heard.</i>)</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> The supper bell! To avoid suspicion, I must -leave you, and join old Mr. Eustace.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Harriet.</i> Leave me! and Charles not here.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Possibly he is detained by his father. What -is to be done? You must not be seen here, or—(<i>After -some hesitation, and with a profound sigh</i>) Ah! there -is no other resource. Go into this room; it is mine; -when the family shall have retired for the night, I’ll -contrive to let you out of the house, and you may -remain concealed in the village till we can obtain the -sanction of your—your father-in-law.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Harriet.</i> I will do all you desire, sir.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> There, be quick; should you be discovered -there, it would be my ruin. (<i>He puts her into the room, -and as he is speaking to her through the door, which -he holds ajar<a id='tn019'></a>.</i>)</p> - -<div class='nf-center-c0'> - <div class='nf-center'> - <div><i>Enter</i> <span class='sc'>Molly</span>.</div> - </div> -</div> - -<p class='c014'>So, here, take the key and lock the door inside. Be -cautious; do not open the door to any one but me, my -little dear; the signal shall be three taps of the hand.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> Oh, oh! his little dear!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> (<i>Alarmed.</i>) Who’s there?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> (<i>Looking slyly at him.</i>) ’Tis I, Mr. Pollypot, -and since, for my misbehaviour, you are resolved to -send me away, I come to—But what was that I heard -you say? Were you saying “good bye” to anybody?</p> - -<p class='c014'><span class='pageno' id='Page_20'>20</span><i>Poly.</i> No—I—I was talking to myself.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> Oh! then you are your own little dear. -“Don’t open to any one but me, my little dear.”</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> (<i>Aside.</i>) The little imp has overheard us.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> An’t you ashamed of yourself, Mr. Ignoramus? -You preach one thing and practise another. You -would turn away a couple of poor servants because -they love one another honestly, whilst you have a pretty -dear concealed in your apartment. But master is come -home now, and he shall know of this. (<i>Calls.</i>) Master! -master! Mr. Eustace!—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Molly, Molly, ’tis all a mistake—listen to me—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> No; you had no pity for me just now; so as -you said, you shall find me as flexible as the worst -Plutus.—Master!—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> I supplicate—I implore—you shall stay, Molly, -you shall stay.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> I stay in a house where there are such doings! -No, no. But I’ll have my revenge on you before I go, -I will.—Master! Mr. Charles! all the house! come -all of you!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> He comes! I am ruined—and poor Charles—</p> - -<div class='nf-center-c0'> - <div class='nf-center'> - <div><i>Enter</i> <span class='sc'>Eustace</span>.</div> - </div> -</div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> Why, what is all this noise about? And -you, Mr. Polyglot, didn’t you hear the supper bell? -The fish is getting cold, and—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> He doesn’t care about your fish, master; he -has fish of his own to fry, the wicked old sinner.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> What does the girl mean?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> I mean, master, that if one serpent, as he -calls me, is to be sent out of your house, to let you -know that you have another remaining in it.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Molly, my dear—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> Don’t whisper me; I’m not to be come over -with soft words, that I can tell you. Here’s Mr. Tutorer, -sir, who would turn away a poor lass for having an -<span class='pageno' id='Page_21'>21</span>honest lover of her own, has got a—I don’t know what, -locked up in his room.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> Why, how dare you accuse—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> It is true enough, sir; and if it is not a -woman, may I never be married! and I would not -swear such a dreadful oath to a fib.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> A woman!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> (<i>Aside.</i>) I don’t know whether I am standing -on my head or my heels.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> Is this true, sir?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> I—you can’t believe—you would not suspect—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> There’s no need to suspect, master, for it is -true. ’Tis his little dear, for I heard him call her so.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> The girl’s earnestness convinces me there -is some truth in this. Your consternation now—your -confusion at my sudden arrival—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Of course—my—my indignation at such a -charge, my—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> In a word, sir, who have you concealed -there?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> I have no one concealed—I—I was talking to -Robin, who is there arranging the—the furniture. -(<i>Aside<a id='tn021'></a>.</i>) I scarcely know what I say.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> Robin there, is he?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Leave the room, girl! Is my word to be -doubted?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> No, Sir. (<i>Calls.</i>) Robin! Robin!</p> - -<div class='nf-center-c0'> - <div class='nf-center'> - <div><i>Enter</i> <span class='sc'>Robin</span>, <i>from the garden</i>.</div> - </div> -</div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> Did you call me?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> How is this!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Ruined and undone!</p> - -<div class='nf-center-c0'> - <div class='nf-center'> - <div>(<i>Charles is seen to cross the garden.</i>)</div> - </div> -</div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> What have you to say to this, Sir?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> (<i>Makes signs to Robin.</i>) He went out the -other way, I suppose.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> There is no other way out but the window.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> The window is low, and that’s the way he got -<span class='pageno' id='Page_22'>22</span>out, and now there is no one else there. (<i>A noise as of -breaking glass is heard in the room.</i>)</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> Dear me! Then the windows are breaking -one another!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> I shall faint! pray leave me just now, sir. I -feel particularly unwell. I’ll explain this to your <a id='tn022'></a>satisfaction -to-morrow.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> I’ll not be trifled with; give me the key.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Unluckily it is inside, and the door is fastened.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> No matter; I’ll force it open.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> Stop, master; I have a key. (<i>Gives three -taps with her hand.</i>)</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> (<i>Sinks into a chair.</i>) The little vixen will -be the death of me.</p> - -<div class='nf-center-c0'> - <div class='nf-center'> - <div><i>Enter from the room</i>, <span class='sc'>Charles</span>;</div> - <div><i>he closes the door hastily after him</i>.</div> - </div> -</div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> What, Charles!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> (<i>Aside.</i>) How came he there?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> What were you doing there? and why -did not you come out at once?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> The fact is, sir, I have been so unfortunate -as to displease my tutor. He has kindly promised to -conceal my offence from you, till he can hope to obtain -your pardon for it. I heard your voice in anger, and -dreading the effects of an abrupt disclosure, I—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> (<i>To Poly.</i>) So, that was it, after all?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Yes—after all.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> And what is his offence? a serious one, no -doubt, to require so much mystery.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> (<i>To Poly.</i>) Remember your oath.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> For the present I must conceal it. I am -bound by an——by a promise.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> Well—(<i>To Molly.</i>) And how dare you, -you little <a id='tn022-2'></a>hussy, tell me such a rhodomontade?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> (<i>Confused.</i>) Why, master,—I only told -you what I thought. (<i>Aside.</i>) I’ll not give it up yet.</p> - -<p class='c014'><span class='pageno' id='Page_23'>23</span><i>Eustace.</i> Come, Mr. Polyglot, to supper.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> I have no appetite, thank you; and am rather -unwell.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> (<i>Aside.</i>) Guilty conscience.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> You look ill. Robin shall bring you something -into your own room.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> (<i>Aside.</i>) And my wife there!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> Come with me, Charles. Good night -Mr. Polyglot: pardon my suspicion, my worthy friend. -(<i>To Molly.</i>) Do you go to bed, and let me hear no -more of that chattering little tongue of <a id='tn023'></a>yours to-night. -Robin! go lock the outer doors, bring me the keys, -and then take some supper to Mr. Polyglot.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> (<i>Aside.</i>) Then there will be no escape -for her.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> Come, Charles, come.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> Remember your promise. (<i>To Poly.</i>)</p> - -<div class='c015'>[<i>Exit.</i></div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> He’s juggling the old gentleman, I’ll lay my -life on’t. But I’ll not sleep till I have found it out.</p> - -<div class='c015'>[<i>Exeunt all but</i> <span class='sc'>Polyglot</span>.</div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Is this a dream! Let me collect my scattered -senses. Surely it cannot be? Married! My pupil who -had never, as I thought, even so much as——O Lord! -absolutely married! And I, Ignatius Polyglot, who -have led the life of a hermit, to be suspected! I must -not think; I’ll retire to rest. Heaven knows I have -need of it. (<i>Approaches the door, and hastily retires.</i>) -Bless us and save us! I forgot, she is there! And how -am I to get her away? Hark! They are locking the -outer gate. There is now no hope.</p> - -<div class='nf-center-c0'> - <div class='nf-center'> - <div><span class='sc'>Harriet</span> <i>opens the door gently, and enters</i>.</div> - </div> -</div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Harriet.</i> At length you are alone. Tell me what -is now to be done? Counsel me—advise me.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Yes, I—how shall I advise you? Advise me -what I had best—at any rate you must not remain here.</p> - -<p class='c014'><span class='pageno' id='Page_24'>24</span><i>Harriet.</i> Where would you have me go?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Wherever you please, my good young lady; -but it is night, you know—these are my apartments, -and after the suspicions that have been excited against -me, I—yet how can I get you away? They have closed -the doors and—but what ails you?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Harriet.</i> Reach me a chair. My agitation for the -last hour has so——I am fainting.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Don’t think of such a thing—I know not how -to help you—’tis not at all in my way. (<i>He leads her -to a chair; her bonnet falls off.</i>) This was wanting -to complete the pleasures of the evening. My dear -lady—Miss—My kind madam, (<i>Taps her hand.</i>) If -any one should come! She recovers. Be composed—It -occurs to me that I have a key of the little wicket -that leads from the garden to the meadow; that way -we may reach the village.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Harriet.</i> Conduct me where you will. But I must -take my dear Frederick with me.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Frederick! what’s Frederick?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Harriet.</i> Our darling boy.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> (<i>Stammering.</i>) And have you a darling boy?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Harriet.</i> He is in the room I have occupied at the -end of the garden.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> O Charles! Charles! In love—married—a -little boy! Have I any thing more to learn? tell me at -once.—So then, I have been tutor to a father of a -family!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Harriet.</i> I can easily bring him away. (<i>Going.</i>)</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> No; you might be observed. There is but -one thing to be done—I foresee my fate—Since I must -be the scape-goat, I’ll fetch him for you.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Harriet.</i> My kind friend!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> I’ll not be gone an instant. (<i>Noise of footsteps.</i>) -Ha! here comes Robin. Quick—retire. (<i>She -goes towards the room.</i>) No, not there. He’ll want to -go into that room with my supper. There—there. (<i>He</i> -<span class='pageno' id='Page_25'>25</span><i>forces her into the room on the opposite side—a lock -heard.</i>)</p> - -<div class='nf-center-c0'> - <div class='nf-center'> - <div><i>Enter</i> <span class='sc'>Robin</span> <i>and</i> <span class='sc'>Molly</span>.</div> - </div> -</div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> I have brought your supper, sir.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Leave it, leave it. And you, Mrs. Molly, what -do you want here? (<i>Robin takes the tray into the room.</i>)</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> (<i>Slyly</i>) I came to ask whether I should clear -away the broken glass yonder. Why, now, if there isn’t -some conjuration there? You told Master Eustace the -key was inside the door, and see if it hasn’t opened of -itself. (<i>Aside.</i>) Then I was right after all.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Ahem! you may go—you may go.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> I hope, sir, you’ll forgive my suspicions. (<i>Sees -the bonnet.</i>) O, ho!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Begone I say! and, in future, beware how -you accuse an innocent person.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> Yes, sir, if you please; and I repent it the -more, seeing, as I do, the proofs of your innocence -before me.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Light my lanthorn. (<i>To Robin, who returns.</i>) -I am going to walk.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> At this time, sir; and in such weather? -Why it is pouring of rain.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> No matter—I—I have a head-ache and want -air. Begone! both of you, and woe be to you if I find -either of you here at my return! (<i>They go off.</i>) There -is not an instant to be lost. The poor innocent baby -must not become a victim to the old man’s displeasure; -and if he should reach the pavilion before me—Into -what a labyrinth has my affection for my pupil led me!</p> - -<div class='c015'>[<i>Exit.</i></div> - -<div class='nf-center-c0'> - <div class='nf-center'> - <div><i>Enter</i> <span class='sc'>Molly</span>, <i>cautiously</i>; <span class='sc'>Robin</span> <i>following</i>.</div> - </div> -</div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> Robin, run and tell old Master Eustace to -come here immediately.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> Why, what would you be at now?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> She’s here; I’m sure of it.</p> - -<p class='c014'><span class='pageno' id='Page_26'>26</span><i>Robin.</i> Who’s here?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly<a id='tn026'></a>.</i> Mr. Ignoramus’s Miss.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> I’ll not go and tell master any such thing. -You know you have got into one scrape already this -evening by telling a fib.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> But this time I have proof positive<a id='tn026-2'></a>. (<i>Takes -up the bonnet.</i>) Look here.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> Why, that does look rather queer, to be -sure. But what does that signify? Depend upon it, -she’s gone.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> How can that be? Haven’t I been watching -outside? Besides, the gates are locked.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> Where can she be then?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> There! I hear her move. Run, quick; -fetch master.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> And yet I don’t like to tell upon old tutorer, -neither.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> Wouldn’t he have told upon us? But we’ll -let master see what a sly old fox he has got in his -house. Go, I tell you. (<i>Forces him off.</i>) Now, -Mr. Pollypot, I’ll teach you something better than -Greek, I will. Ah! here comes Mr. Charles. He’ll -be delighted at this, for the tutorer leads the poor lad -such a life, that he’ll be glad enough to get quit of him, -I warrant me.</p> - -<div class='nf-center-c0'> - <div class='nf-center'> - <div><i>Enter</i> <span class='sc'>Charles</span>, <i>from garden</i>.</div> - </div> -</div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> My anxiety is insupportable; and at all -risks I must——Why, Molly, what do you want here?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> O, sir, I have such news for you! You are -the only one in the house who is kind to me, and now -I’ll prove my gratitude. I’ll soon get the tutorer -turned away, and make you your own master.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> What do you mean?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> I have discovered it at last. She is here -after all.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> Is the girl out of her senses?</p> - -<p class='c014'><span class='pageno' id='Page_27'>27</span><i>Molly.</i> No, no; here’s proof! here’s the creature’s -bonnet; and I’ve sent Robin to bring your father here.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> Sent for my father! Unhappy girl, what -have you done!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> Lord, Mr. Charles, what ails you?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> Alas! you know not the mischief you -have effected. ’Tis not he who is to blame; he has -interfered but to serve me: the lady, who is here concealed, -is my wife.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> (<i>With mingled astonishment and grief.</i>) -Your wife!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> This precipitate disclosure has rendered -abortive our hopes of obtaining pardon from my father. -Your malicious curiosity has destroyed the happiness -of us all.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> (<i>Bursting into tears.</i>) O, Mr. Charles, indeed, -indeed, if I had but known——you, who are so -good, so kind——. But dont’ee grieve, dont’ee now. -I’ll die rather than harm you.—I’ll take all the blame -upon myself.—There may yet be time; I’ll run and -stop Robin. (<i>Going.</i>)</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> (<i>Without<a id='tn027'></a>.</i>) This way, sir, this way.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> O, I am indeed an unhappy girl. But, -Mr. Charles, dear Mr. Charles, dont’ee be downcast. -Leave it to me, I’ll get you through, though I lose my -place, I will. (<i>Hastily wipes her eyes, and assumes an -air of composure.</i>)</p> - -<div class='nf-center-c0'> - <div class='nf-center'> - <div><i>Enter</i> <span class='sc'>Eustace</span> (<i>in his dressing gown</i>) <i>preceded by</i> <span class='sc'>Robin</span>.</div> - </div> -</div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> Yes, sir, Molly says you may now be convinced.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> So. You here, Charles?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> Yes, sir, I—I heard a noise, and was -fearful——</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> ’Tis well; stay where you are: the scene -you are about to witness will serve you as a lesson -<span class='pageno' id='Page_28'>28</span>which may last you your life. (<i>To Robin and Molly.</i>) -As for you, if you have called me out of my bed by -another such a rigmarole as the last,——</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> O, no, sir, it is all sure enough this time. -(<i>To Molly, who makes signs to him.</i>) I had trouble -enough to persuade master, but he is come at last, -you see.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> Well, and what for?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> What for! Why, to be sure, you know well -enough. The lady, you know.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> What lady? What is the simpleton talking -about?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> Why the lady that is concealed here.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> Robin, you have been at the ale-barrel.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> O, the little gipsey! Didn’t you tell me,—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> No, it isn’t true.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> Well, hang me but——. And I suppose -you’ll say you didn’t send me to bring master.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> To be sure I will, for it’s false.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> And that bonnet—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> (<i>Putting it on.</i>) It is mine. Master, there -ben’t a true word in all he is telling you. (<i>Pinches -his arm.</i>) Can’t you hold your tongue.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> Oh!—that isn’t the way to make me. -Master, I say again——</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> And I say, Master,——</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> Hold your tongues, both of you. There -is some mystery here. The evident alarm of that -girl—(<i>To Molly, who is about to speak.</i>) Silence! -(<i>Takes a candle, and looks into the room at the left -hand.</i>)</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> I almost sink with dread.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> (<i>To Robin.</i>) I’ve a great mind never to -marry you for this.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> (<i>Returns.</i>) No one there. (<i>Goes to the -opposite door<a id='tn028'></a>.</i>) The door is locked. (<i>Gives three taps.</i>)</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Harriet.</i> (<i>Within.</i>) Is that my kind protector?</p> - -<p class='c014'><span class='pageno' id='Page_29'>29</span><i>Eustace.</i> (<i>Staggering away.</i>) Her kind protector! -’Tis but too true, then! The old hypocrite! thus to -deceive me and dishonour my house! The monster -shall instantly quit it, and for ever. Hush! some one -approaches! ’tis he: silence, I command. (<i>He extinguishes -the lights.</i>)</p> - -<p class='c016'><i>Enter</i> <span class='sc'>Polyglot</span>, <i>with his dark lanthorn; Master</i> -<span class='sc'>Frederick</span> <i>is concealed under his cloak. He goes -directly, but cautiously, to the door</i>.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> (<i>In an under tone.</i>) Open—open quickly—’tis -I. I have secured our precious charge. Now, quick; -let us away, or we may be interrupted by old Argus.</p> - -<div class='nf-center-c0'> - <div class='nf-center'> - <div><i>Enter</i> <span class='sc'>Harriet</span>.</div> - </div> -</div> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> You are right, for old Argus has you.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Harriet.</i> O, heavens! I’m lost! (<i>Robin lights the -candles.</i>)</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> No, madam, you are found. And you! -Is it thus you repay the confidence I have reposed in -you? Are you the man I have selected as a guide, as -a monitor to my son? A female concealed in your -apartment!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> My dear father, I must no longer allow—</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> Peace! And what is it you are endeavouring -to hide there?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Nothing—a mere trifle.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> I insist upon knowing. (<i>Draws open his -cloak and discovers Master Frederick.</i>) You call this -a trifle do you?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Harriet.</i> (<i>Running towards him.</i>) My Frederick! -my child!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> O!—Now what have you to say for -yourself?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> That it <i>is</i> a Frederick—a child I mean,—I -confess; but suffer me to explain, and——</p> - -<p class='c014'><span class='pageno' id='Page_30'>30</span><i>Eustace.</i> Explanation is needless: your—mere trifle—explains -itself. And yet I would hope you are -not the monster you appear. Answer me one question: -Is the lady your wife?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> No, no; yet if you would only——</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> The unblushing sinner! Then, will you -marry her?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> (<i>To Charles.</i>) I have done and suffered much -to serve you: I can’t do that, you know.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> Do you hesitate?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> Will you but listen to me, sir?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace<a id='tn030'></a>.</i> No, I will listen to but one thing only. -(<i>To Poly.</i>) When a man has committed an error, is -it not his first duty to do what he can to repair it?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Granted.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> To restore her respectability to the woman -he has betrayed?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Granted.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> To protect and bestow his name upon his -child.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Granted. (<i>To Charles, who is about to interrupt -him.</i>) Further concealment is impossible. (<i>To -Eustace<a id='tn030-2'></a>.</i>) But suppose his family should refuse——</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> Refuse! In such a case, no honest member -of it would refuse to sanction the union; if he did, -he would share in the guilt of the offender.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> I am quite of your opinion.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> Then why hesitate?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> The lady is already married; but if you -would just have the kindness to repeat to your son -all you have said to me——</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> My son!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Charles.</i> Yes, sir; we throw ourselves at your feet, -and implore your pardon. This lady is my wife.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> How! married! without consulting me! -Leave me, ungrateful boy!</p> - -<p class='c014'><span class='pageno' id='Page_31'>31</span><i>Charles.</i> Will not the choice I have made procure -your forgiveness, sir!</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Let me intercede for them. Remember the -lecture you have just delivered to me. Practice what -you preach. Besides, you can’t unmarry them, you -know.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> And when I had another scheme in view -for him?</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> It is all as it should be. You wished him to -marry—what can it signify?—there he is, without farther -ado, ready married to your hands.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Robin.</i> You save the trouble and expense<a id='tn031'></a> of a -wedding.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Harriet.</i> You have a daughter who will love you.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> And a little grandson ready made, master.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> But the example——</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Molly.</i> ’Tis a good one, master; and, if you please, -Robin and I will follow it.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Eustace.</i> Well—well—since it is so: but there is a -little urchin who, I foresee, will one of these days play -us a similar trick.</p> - -<p class='c014'><i>Poly.</i> Never fear: place him under my care—you -know me; and I give him twenty years’ notice, that if -he too should attempt to elude my vigilance—Ah me! -as I have done for the father, so shall I doubtless be -induced to do for the son; and I trust to your indulgence -for my re-appearance in the character of—<span class='sc'>Scape-Goat</span>.</p> - -<div class='nf-center-c0'> -<div class='nf-center c002'> - <div>THE END.</div> - </div> -</div> - -<div class='chapter'> - <h2 class='c010'>Transcriber’s Notes</h2> -</div> -<table class='table0' summary=''> - <tr> - <th class='c011'>Printed</th> - <th class='c011'>Changed to</th> - <th class='c017'>Page</th> - <th class='c012'> </th> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'>Mr,</td> - <td class='c011'>Mr.</td> - <td class='c017'><a href='#tn005'>5</a></td> - <td class='c012'>Where’s Mr. Ignoramus,</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'> </td> - <td class='c011'>to</td> - <td class='c017'><a href='#tn012'>12</a></td> - <td class='c012'><i>Whispers to Polyglot.</i></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'>Your’s</td> - <td class='c011'>Yours</td> - <td class='c017'><a href='#tn016'>16</a></td> - <td class='c012'>been placed? Yours.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'>Your’s</td> - <td class='c011'>Yours</td> - <td class='c017'><a href='#tn016-2'>16</a></td> - <td class='c012'>my conduct? Yours.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'>Your’s</td> - <td class='c011'>Yours</td> - <td class='c017'><a href='#tn016-3'>16</a></td> - <td class='c012'>secret marriage? Yours.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'>mischevous</td> - <td class='c011'>mischievous</td> - <td class='c017'><a href='#tn018'>18</a></td> - <td class='c012'><i>Poly.</i> The mischievous truant!</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'>hussey</td> - <td class='c011'>hussy</td> - <td class='c017'><a href='#tn022-2'>22</a></td> - <td class='c012'>you little hussy,</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'>expence</td> - <td class='c011'>expense</td> - <td class='c017'><a href='#tn031'>31</a></td> - <td class='c012'>expense of a wedding</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'>ajar,</td> - <td class='c011'>ajar.</td> - <td class='c017'><a href='#tn019'>19</a></td> - <td class='c012'><i>he holds ajar.</i></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'>Aside</td> - <td class='c011'>Aside.</td> - <td class='c017'><a href='#tn021'>21</a></td> - <td class='c012'>(<i>Aside.</i>) I scarcely know</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'>satistion</td> - <td class='c011'>satisfaction</td> - <td class='c017'><a href='#tn022'>22</a></td> - <td class='c012'>explain this to your satisfaction</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'>your’s</td> - <td class='c011'>yours</td> - <td class='c017'><a href='#tn023'>23</a></td> - <td class='c012'>tongue of yours to-night.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'>Molly,</td> - <td class='c011'>Molly.</td> - <td class='c017'><a href='#tn026'>26</a></td> - <td class='c012'><i>Molly.</i> Mr. Ignoramus’s Miss.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'>positive,</td> - <td class='c011'>positive.</td> - <td class='c017'><a href='#tn026-2'>26</a></td> - <td class='c012'>I have proof positive.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'>Without</td> - <td class='c011'>Without.</td> - <td class='c017'><a href='#tn027'>27</a></td> - <td class='c012'><i>Robin.</i> (<i>Without.</i>) This way,</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'>door</td> - <td class='c011'>door.</td> - <td class='c017'><a href='#tn028'>28</a></td> - <td class='c012'><i>opposite door.</i>) The door is locked.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'>Eustace,</td> - <td class='c011'>Eustace.</td> - <td class='c017'><a href='#tn030'>30</a></td> - <td class='c012'><i>Eustace.</i> No, I will listen</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td class='c011'>Eustace</td> - <td class='c011'>Eustace.</td> - <td class='c017'><a href='#tn030-2'>30</a></td> - <td class='c012'><i>Eustace.</i>) But suppose his family</td> - </tr> -</table> - -<p class='c018'>Other Changes:-</p> - - - - - - - - -<pre> - - - - - -End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of The Scape-Goat, by John Poole - -*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK THE SCAPE-GOAT *** - -***** This file should be named 52717-h.htm or 52717-h.zip ***** -This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: - http://www.gutenberg.org/5/2/7/1/52717/ - -Produced by David Edwards, readbueno and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This -file was produced from images generously made available -by The Internet Archive) - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will -be renamed. - -Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright -law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, -so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United -States without permission and without paying copyright -royalties. 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