diff options
| author | nfenwick <nfenwick@pglaf.org> | 2025-02-06 00:43:34 -0800 |
|---|---|---|
| committer | nfenwick <nfenwick@pglaf.org> | 2025-02-06 00:43:34 -0800 |
| commit | d7e4b193cadef4ff5b90606ac932af132976b5bf (patch) | |
| tree | ad5b2e25e6d7b74695d6ee2bbc46ed58ce368419 /old/52393-0.txt | |
| parent | ff5f3f32da9a9ae09ddab3a8ee69332944976105 (diff) | |
Diffstat (limited to 'old/52393-0.txt')
| -rw-r--r-- | old/52393-0.txt | 5097 |
1 files changed, 0 insertions, 5097 deletions
diff --git a/old/52393-0.txt b/old/52393-0.txt deleted file mode 100644 index 8648ca8..0000000 --- a/old/52393-0.txt +++ /dev/null @@ -1,5097 +0,0 @@ -The Project Gutenberg EBook of Adventures in Wallypug-Land, by G. E. Farrow - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most -other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions -whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of -the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at -www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have -to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook. - -Title: Adventures in Wallypug-Land - -Author: G. E. Farrow - -Illustrator: Alan Wright - -Release Date: June 22, 2016 [EBook #52393] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: UTF-8 - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK ADVENTURES IN WALLYPUG-LAND *** - - - - -Produced by Giovanni Fini, David Edwards and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This -book was produced from scanned images of public domain -material from the Google Books project.) - - - - - - - - TRANSCRIBER’S NOTES: - -—Obvious print and punctuation errors were corrected. - -—Bold text has been rendered ad =bold text=. - - -[Illustration: So soon as we got into the street, we met the Turtle and -the Pelican, walking arm-in-arm, and each smoking a cigarette.—Page -151. - _Wallypugland._] - - - - - ADVENTURES IN - - WALLYPUG-LAND - - BY G. E. FARROW - - AUTHOR OF “THE WALLYPUG OF WHY,” “THE WALLYPUG IN - LONDON,” ETC. - - _WITH FIFTY-SIX ILLUSTRATIONS BY ALAN WRIGHT_ - - A. L. BURT COMPANY, PUBLISHERS, - 52-58 DUANE STREET, NEW YORK. - - - - - DEDICATED - TO - LIONEL - - - - - ADVENTURES IN WALLYPUG-LAND. - - -[Illustration] - -PREFACE. - - - MY DEAR LITTLE FRIENDS, - -I have again to thank you for the many kind and delightful letters -which I have received from all parts of the world, and I cannot tell -you how happy I am to find that I have succeeded so well in pleasing -you with my stories. - -What am I to say to the little boy who wrote, and begged “that, if the -Wallypug came to stay with me again, would I please invite him too?” or -to the other dear little fellow who came to me with tears in his eyes, -to tell me that some superior grown-up person had informed him that -“there never was a Wallypug, and it was all just a pack of nonsense”; -that “Girlie never went to Why at all, and that in fact there was no -such place in existence”? - -I can only regretfully admit that, sooner or later as we grow up to -be men and women, there are bound to be many fond illusions which -are one by one ruthlessly dispelled, and that many of the dreams and -thoughts which, in our younger days, we cherish most dearly, the hard, -matter-of-fact world will always persist in describing as “a pack of -nonsense.” However, for many of us fortunately, this tiresome time has -not yet arrived, and for the present we will refuse to give up our poor -dear Wallypug—for whom I declare I have as great an affection and -regard, as the most enthusiastic of my young readers. - -You will see that in the following story I have described my own -experiences during a recent visit to the remarkable land over which -His Majesty reigns as a “kind of king”, and I may tell you that, -amongst all of the extraordinary creatures that I met there, there -was not one who expressed the slightest doubt as to the reality of -what was happening; while for my own part, I should as soon think of -doubting the existence of the fairies themselves, as of the simple, -kind-hearted, little Wallypug. - -There now! I hope that I have given quite a clear and lucid -explanation, and one which will prevent you from being made unhappy -by any doubts which may arise in your mind as to the possibility, or -probability, of this story. Please don’t forget to write to me again -during the coming year. - - Believing me to be as ever, - - Your affectionate Friend, - - G. E. FARROW. - - - - -CONTENTS. - - - ADVENTURES IN WALLYPUGLAND. - - CHAP. PAGE - - I. How I Went to Why 13 - - II. A Strange Welcome 29 - - III. A Terrible Night 40 - - IV. Late for Breakfast 50 - - V. The Trial 62 - - VI. His Majesty is Deposed 74 - - VII. Foiled 83 - - VIII. The Little Blue People 94 - - IX. The Wallypug Recovers his Crown 103 - - X. The Home of Ho-Lor 116 - - XI. The Why and Wer-Har-Wei Railway 131 - - XII. Back Again at Why 145 - - XIII. A New State of Affairs 155 - - XIV. “Good for the Complexion” 165 - - XV. “Wallypug’s Blush Limited” 175 - - XVI. “Au Revoir” 187 - - - THE BLUE DWARFS 197 - - -[Illustration: Adventures in Wallypug-Land] - - -[Illustration: MR. NOBODY.] - - - - -CHAPTER I. - -HOW I WENT TO WHY. - - -FOR some time past I have been the guest of his Majesty the Wallypug at -his palace in the mysterious kingdom of Why—a country so remarkable -that even now I am only just beginning to get used to my strange -surroundings and stranger neighbors. Imagine, if you can, a place -where all of the animals not only talk, but take an active part in -the government of the land, a place where one is as likely as not -to receive an invitation to an evening party from an ostrich, or is -expected to escort an elderly rhinoceros in to dinner; where it is -quite an everyday occurrence to be called upon by a hen with a brood of -young chickens just as you are sitting down to tea, and be expected to -take a lively interest in her account of how the youngest chick passed -through its latest attack of the “pip.” - -In such a country, the unexpected is always happening, and I am -continually being startled in the streets at being addressed by some -dangerous-looking quadruped, or an impertinent bird, for I must say -that as a class the birds are the most insolent of all the inhabitants -of this strange land. There is in particular one old crow, a most -objectionable personage, and a cockatoo who is really the most violent -and ill-natured bird that I have ever been acquainted with. - -She takes a very active interest in Parliamentary affairs, and is a -strong supporter of woman’s wrongs. - -“Every woman has her wrongs,” she declares, “and if she hasn’t she -ought to have.” - -You will naturally wish to know how I reached this strange country, -and will, no doubt, be surprised when I tell you how the journey was -accomplished. - -One morning a few weeks since, I received a letter from his Majesty -the Wallypug asking me to visit him at his palace at Why, in order -to assist him in establishing some of our social customs and methods -of government, which he had so greatly admired during his visit to -England, and which he was desirous of imitating in his own land. A -little packet was enclosed in the letter, bearing the words, “The -shortest way to Why. This side up with _anxiety_.” “Well,” I thought, -“I suppose they mean ‘This side up with _care_,’” and was proceeding -very carefully to open the packet when a gust of wind rushed in at the -window, and blowing open the paper wrapper, scattered the contents—a -little white powder—in all directions. Some particles flew up into -my eyes, and caused them to smart so violently that I was obliged to -close them for some time till the pain had gone, and when I opened them -again, what do you think? I was no longer in my study at home, but out -on a kind of heath in the brilliant sunshine, and apparently miles from -a house of any kind. A finger-post stood a little way in front of me, -and I could see that three roads met just here. Anxiously I hurried up -to the post to see where I was. One arm pointed, “To Nowhere.” “And -I certainly don’t want to go there,” I thought; the other one was -inscribed, “To Somewhere,” which was decidedly a little better, but the -third one said, “To Everywhere Else.” - -[Illustration: “THAT’S NOT MUCH USE.”] - -“And, good gracious me,” I thought, “that’s not much use, for I don’t -know in the least now which of the last two roads to take.” I was -puzzling my brain as to what was the best thing to be done, when -I happened to look down the road leading to “Nowhere,” and saw a -curious-looking little person running towards me. He had an enormous -head, and apparently his arms and legs were attached to it, for I could -see no trace of a body. He was flourishing something in his hand as he -ran along, and as soon as he came closer I discovered that it was his -card which he handed to me with a polite bow and an extensive smile, as -soon as he got near enough to do so. - - “_MR. NOBODY,_ - _No. 1 NONESUCH-STREET,_ - _NOWHERE,_” - -is what I read. - -The little man was still smiling and bowing, so I held out my hand and -said: - -“How do you do, sir? I am very pleased to make your acquaintance. -Perhaps you can be good enough to tell me—” - -The little man nodded violently. - -“To tell me where I am,” I continued. - -Mr. Nobody looked very wise, and after a few moments’ thought smiled -and nodded more violently than ever, and simply pointed his finger at -me. - -“Yes, yes,” I cried, rather impatiently; “of course I know that I’m -here, but what I want to know is, what place is this?” - -The little fellow knitted his brows, and looked very thoughtful, and -finally staring at me sorrowfully, he slowly shook his head. - -“You don’t know?” I inquired. - -He shook his head again. - -“Dear me, this is very sad; the poor man is evidently dumb,” I said, -half aloud. - -Mr. Nobody must have heard me, for he nodded violently, then resuming -his former smile, he bowed again, and turning on his heels ran back in -the direction of Nowhere, stopping every now and then to turn around -and nod and smile and wave his hand. - -“What a remarkable little person,” I was just saying, when I heard a -voice above my head calling out: - -“Man! man!” - -I looked up and saw a large crow perched on the finger-post. He had a -newspaper in one claw, and was gravely regarding me over the tops of -his spectacles. - -“Well! what are you staring at?” he remarked as soon as he caught my -eye. - -“Well, really,” I began. - -“Haven’t you ever seen a crow before?” he interrupted. - -“Of course I have,” I answered rather angrily, for my surprise at -hearing him talk was fast giving way to indignation at his insolent -tone and manner. - -“Very well, then, what do you want to stand there gaping at me in -that absurd way for?” said the bird. “What did he say to you?” he -continued, jerking his head in the direction in which Mr. Nobody had -disappeared. - -“Nothing,” I replied. - -“Very well, then, what was it?” he asked. - -“What do you mean?” said I. - -“Why, stupid, you said Nobody and nothing, didn’t you, and as two -negatives make an affirmative that means he must have said something.” - -“I’m afraid I don’t quite understand,” I said. - -“Ignorant ostrich!” remarked the crow contemptuously. - -“Look here,” I cried, getting very indignant, “I will not be spoken to -like that by a mere bird!” - -“Oh, really! Who do you think you are, pray, you ridiculous biped? -Where’s your hat?” - -I was too indignant to answer, and though I should have liked to have -asked the name of the place I was at, I determined not to hold any -further conversation with the insolent bird, and walked away in the -direction of “Somewhere,” pursued by the sound of mocking laughter from -the crow. - -[Illustration: “WHERE’S YOUR HAT?”] - -I had not gone far, however, before I perceived a curious kind of -carriage coming towards me. It was a sort of rickshaw, and was drawn -by a kangaroo, who was jerking it along behind him. A large ape sat -inside, hugging a carpet bag, and holding on to the dashboard with his -toes. - -“Let’s pass him with withering contempt,” I heard one of them say. - -“All right,” was the reply. “Drive on.” - -“I say, Man,” called out the Ape, as they passed, “we’re not taking the -slightest notice of you.” - -“Oh, aren’t you? Well, I’m sure I don’t care,” I replied rather crossly. - -The Kangaroo stopped and stared at me in amazement, and the Ape got out -of the rickshaw and came towards me, looking very indignant. - -“Do you know who I am?” he asked, striking an attitude. - -“No, I don’t,” I replied, “and what’s more, I don’t care.” - -“But I’m a person of consequence,” he gasped. - -“You are only an ape or a monkey,” I said firmly. - -“Oh! I can clearly see that you don’t know me,” remarked the Ape -pityingly. “I’m Oom Hi.” - -“Indeed,” I said unconcernedly. “I am afraid I’ve never heard of you.” - -“Never heard of Oom Hi,” cried the Ape. “Why, I am the inventor of -Broncho.” - -“What’s that?” I asked. “Good gracious! what ignorance,” said the Ape; -“here, go and fetch my bag,” he whispered to the Kangaroo, who ran back -to the rickshaw and returned with the carpet bag. - -“This,” continued Oom Hi, taking out a bottle, “is the article; it is -called ‘Broncho,’ and is excellent for coughs, colds, and affections -of the throat; you will notice that each bottle bears a label stating -that the mixture is prepared according to my own formula, and bears -my signature; none other is genuine without it. The Wallypug, when he -returned from England and heard that I had invented it, declared that I -must be a literary genius.” - -[Illustration: “There,” continued Oom Hi, taking out the bottle, “is -the article; it is called ‘Broncho.’”—Page 24. - _Wallypugland._] - -“A what!” I exclaimed. - -“A literary genius,” repeated the Ape, smirking complacently. - -“Why, what on earth has cough mixture to do with literature?” I -inquired. - -“I don’t know, I’m sure,” admitted Oom Hi, “but the Wallypug said that -in England any one who invented anything of that sort was supposed to -possess great literary talent.” - -“The Wallypug!” I exclaimed, suddenly remembering. “Am I anywhere near -his Kingdom of Why, then?” - -“Of course you are; it’s only about a mile or two down the road. Are -you going there?” inquired Oom Hi. - -“Well, yes,” I answered. “I’ve had an invitation from his Majesty, and -should rather like to go there, as I’m so near.” - -“His Majesty; he—he—he, that’s good,” laughed the Kangaroo. “Do you -call the Wallypug ‘his Majesty’?” he asked. - -“Of course,” I replied, “he is a king, isn’t he?” - -“A _kind_ of king,” corrected Oom Hi. “You don’t catch us calling him -‘your Majesty,’ I can tell you though, one animal is as good as another -here, and if anything, a little better. If you are going to Why, we may -as well go back with you, and give you a lift in the rickshaw.” - -“You’re very kind,” I said, gratefully. - -“Not at all, not at all; jump in,” said Oom Hi. - -“Hold on a moment,” said the Kangaroo. “It’s _his_ turn to pull, you -know.” - -“Of course, of course,” said the Ape, getting into the vehicle; “put -him in the shafts!” - -“What do you mean?” I expostulated. - -“Your turn to pull the rickshaw, you know; we always take turns, and -as I have been dragging it for some time it’s your turn now.” - -“But I’m not going to pull that thing with you two animals in it. I -never heard of such a thing,” I declared. - -“Who are you calling an animal?” demanded the Kangaroo, sulkily. -“You’re one yourself, aren’t you?” - -“Well, I suppose I am,” I admitted. “But I’m not going to draw that -thing, all the same.” - -“Oh, get in, get in; don’t make a fuss. I suppose I shall have to take -a turn myself,” said Oom Hi, grasping the handles, and the Kangaroo and -myself having taken our seats we were soon traveling down the road. The -Kangaroo turned out to be a very pleasant companion after all, and when -he found out that I came from England told me all about his brother, -who was a professional boxer, and had been to London and made his -fortune as the Boxing Kangaroo. He was quite delighted when I told him -that I had seen notices of his performance in the papers. We soon came -in sight of a walled city, which Oom Hi, turning around, informed me -was Why. And on reaching the gate he gave the rickshaw in charge of an -old turtle, who came waddling up, and each of the animals taking one of -my arms, I was led in triumph through the city gates to the Wallypug’s -palace, several creatures, including a motherly-looking goose and -a little gosling, taking a lively interest in my progress, while a -giraffe in a very high collar craned his neck through a port-hole to -try and get a glimpse of us as we passed under the portcullis. - - - - -CHAPTER II. - -A STRANGE WELCOME. - - -[Illustration: GOOD BYE!] - -WE soon reached the Wallypug’s palace, which stood in a large park in -the center of the city of Why. I had been very interested in noticing -the curious architecture in the streets as we passed along, but was -scarcely prepared to find the palace such a very remarkable place. It -was a long, low, rambling building, built in a most singular style, -with all sorts of curious towers and gables at every point. - -Oom Hi and the Kangaroo saw me as far as the entrance, and then took -their departure, saying that they would see me again another day, and I -walked up the stone steps, to what I imagined to be the principal door, -alone. To my great surprise, however, I found that, instead of being -the way in, it was nothing more or less than a huge jam-pot, with a -very large label on it marked “Strawberry Jam,” while above it were -the words, “When is a door not a door?” “When is a door not a door?” I -repeated, vaguely conscious of having heard the question before. - -[Illustration: “SOLD AGAIN! SERVE YOU RIGHT!”] - -“Ha—ha—ha,” laughed a mocking voice at the bottom of the steps, and -looking down I saw an enormous Cockatoo with a Paisley shawl over her -shoulders and walking with the aid of a crutched stick. - -“Sold again, were you? Serve you right,” she cried. “When is a door not -a door? Pooh! fancy not knowing that old chestnut. Why! when it’s a -jar, of course, stupid. Bah!” - -“It’s a very absurd practical joke, that’s all that I can say,” I -remarked, crossly, walking down the steps again. “Perhaps you can tell -me how I am going to get into this remarkable place.” - -“Humph! Perhaps I can and perhaps I won’t,” said the Cockatoo. “I dare -say it’s a better place than you came from, anyhow. You’re not the -first man that has come down here with his superior airs and graces, -grumbling and finding fault with this, that, and the other; but we’ll -soon take the conceit out of you, I can tell you. Where’s your hat?” - -This was the second creature that had asked me this question, and -really they threw so much scorn and contempt into the inquiry that one -would imagine that it was a most disgraceful offense to be without a -head covering. - -I thought the most dignified thing to do under the circumstances was to -take no further notice of the bird, and was quietly walking away when -the Cockatoo screamed out again, “Where’s your hat? Where’s your hat? -Where’s your hat?” each time louder and louder, till the last inquiry -ended in a perfect shriek. - -“Don’t be so ridiculous,” I cried. “I’ve left it at home, if you must -know.” - -“Down with the hatters!” screamed the Cockatoo irrelevantly, “Down -with the Wallypug! Down with men without hats! Down with everybody and -everything!” and the wretched bird danced about like a demented fury. - -At the sound of all this commotion a number of windows in the upper -stories of the palace were thrown open, and curious heads were popped -out to see what was the matter. Among them and immediately over my -head, I noticed the Doctor-in-Law. - -“Oh! it’s you, is it, kicking up all this fuss?” he remarked as soon as -he recognized me. - -“Well, really!” I replied, “I think you might have the politeness to -say ‘How do you do?’ considering that it is some months since we met.” - -“Oh, do you indeed?” said the Doctor-in-Law, contemptuously. “Well, -supposing I don’t care one way or another. Where’s your hat?” - -[Illustration: “DOWN WITH THE DOCTOR-IN-LAW.”] - -Before I could answer the Cockatoo had screamed out “Down with the -Doctor-in-Law!” and the irate little man had replied by throwing a book -at her head out of the palace window. - -[Illustration: “I saw his Majesty, the Wallypug himself, running across -the lawn towards me, with both hands stretched out in welcome.”—Page -35. - _Wallypugland._] - -I was thoroughly disgusted at this behavior and at the strange -reception that I was receiving, and had fully determined to try and -find some way of getting home again, when, happening to turn round, I -saw his Majesty the Wallypug himself running across the lawn towards -me, with both hands stretched out in welcome, and his kind little face -beaming with good nature. - -“How d’ye do? How d’ye do?” he cried. “So pleased to see you. Didn’t -expect you quite so soon, though. Come along—this way.” And his -Majesty led me to another entrance, and through a large square hall -hung with tapestry and many quaint pieces of old-fashioned armor, to a -door marked “His Majesty the Wallypug. Strictly private.” I noticed, in -passing, that the words, “His Majesty” had been partly painted out, and -“What cheek!” written above them. Once inside the door, the Wallypug -motioned me to a chair, and said, in a mysterious whisper, - -“I’m _so_ glad you came before _she_ returned; there’s so much I want -to tell you.” - -“Who do you mean?” I asked. - -“Sh—Madame—er, my sister-in-law,” he replied, with a sigh. - -“Your sister-in-law!” I exclaimed. “Why, I didn’t know you were -married.” - -“Neither am I,” said his Majesty, with a puzzled frown. “That’s the -awkward part about it.” - -“But how on earth can you possibly have a sister-in-law, unless you -have a wife or a married brother?” I asked. - -“Well, I’ve never quite been able to understand _how_ they make it -out,” said the poor Wallypug, sorrowfully; “but I believe it is -something mixed up with the Deceased Wife’s Sister’s Bill, and the fact -that my uncle, The Grand Mochar of Gamboza, was married twice. Anyhow, -when I returned from London I found this lady, who _says_ that she -is my sister-in-law, established here in the palace; and—and—” his -Majesty sank his voice to a whisper, “she rules me with a rod of iron.” - -I had no time to make further inquiries, for just then the door opened, -and a majestic-looking person sailed into the room, and after looking -me up and down with elevated eyebrows, pointed her finger at me, and -said, in a stern voice: - -“And _who_ is this person, pray?” - -“Oh, this,” said his Majesty, smiling nervously, and bringing me -forward, “is the gentleman who was so kind to us in London, you know. -Allow me to present him, Mr. Er—er——” - -“I hope you have not been picking up any undesirable acquaintances, -Wallypug,” interrupted his Majesty’s Sister-in-Law severely. “I don’t -like the look of him at all.” - -“I’m sorry, madame, that my appearance doesn’t please you,” I -interposed, feeling rather nettled; “perhaps under the circumstances I -had better——” - -[Illustration: “I DON’T APPROVE OF YOU IN THE LEAST,” SAID THE -SISTER-IN-LAW.] - -“You had better do as you are bid and speak when you are spoken to,” -remarked the lady grimly. “Where’s your hat?” - -“I haven’t one,” I replied, rather abruptly, I am afraid, but I was -getting quite tired of this continual cross-questioning; “and really I -don’t see that it’s of the slightest consequence,” I ventured to add. - -“Oh! don’t you,” said his Majesty’s Sister-in-Law, with a sarcastic -smile. “Well, that’s one of the _many_ points upon which we shall -disagree. Now, look here, I may tell you at once that I don’t approve -of you in the least; still, as you are here now you had better remain; -but mind, no putting on parts or giving yourself airs and graces, or -I shall have something to say to you. Do you understand?” And with a -severe glance at me, the lady folded her arms and stalked out of the -room, leaving his Majesty and myself staring blankly at one another. - - - - -CHAPTER III. - -A TERRIBLE NIGHT. - - -MY reception at Why had been such a very peculiar one that I had fully -made up my mind to return home at once, but his Majesty the Wallypug -begged me so earnestly to stay with him, at any rate for a few days, -that I determined, out of friendship to him, to put up as best I could -with that extraordinary person the Sister-in-Law, and the rest of the -creatures, and remain, in order to help him if possible to establish -his position at Why on a firmer basis. - -So I took possession of a suite of rooms in the west wing of the -palace, near his Majesty’s private apartments, and we spent a very -pleasant evening together in my sitting-room, playing draughts till -bedtime, when his Majesty left me to myself, promising that he would -show me around the palace grounds the first thing in the morning. - -After he had gone, there being a bright wood fire burning in my -bedroom, I drew a high-backed easy-chair up to the old-fashioned -fireplace, and made myself comfortable for a little while before -retiring for the night. - -My bedroom was a large, old-fashioned apartment, with a low ceiling -and curiously carved oak wainscoting, and I watched the firelight -flickering, and casting all sorts of odd shadows in the dark corners, -till I must have fallen asleep, for I remember awaking with a start, -at hearing a crash in the corridor outside my bedroom door. A muttered -exclamation, and a Pelican, carrying a bedroom candlestick marched in, -and carefully fastened the door behind him. - -“Great clumsy things—I can’t think who can have left them there,” -he grumbled, sitting down and rubbing one foot against the other, as -though in pain. And I suddenly came to the conclusion that he must have -stumbled over my boots, which I had stood just outside the door, in -order that they might be cleaned for the morning. - -The Pelican had not noticed me in my high-backed chair, and, being -rather curious to see what he was up to, I kept perfectly still. - -Going over to a clothes press, which stood in one corner of the room, -the bird drew forth a long white night-gown and a nightcap; these he -proceeded solemnly to array himself in, and then, getting up on a -chair, he turned back the bedclothes with his enormous beak, and was -just about to hop into bed, when I thought that it was time for me to -interfere. - -“Here! I say, what are you up to?” I called out in a stern voice. - -[Illustration: “He turned back the bedclothes with his enormous beak, -and was just about to hop into bed.”—Page 42. - _Wallypugland._] - -“Oh—h-h! Ah—h-h! There’s a man in my room!” screamed the Pelican, -evidently greatly alarmed. “Murder! Fire! Police! Thieves!” - -“Hold your tongue!” I commanded. “What do you mean by making all that -noise at this time of night, and what are you doing in my room?” - -“Your room, indeed!” gasped the bird; “my room you mean, you -featherless biped, you!” - -“Look here!” I remarked, going up to the Pelican, and shaking him till -his beak rattled again. “Don’t you talk to me like that, my good bird, -for I won’t put up with it.” You see I was getting tired of being -treated so contemptuously by all of these creatures, and was determined -to put a stop to it, somehow. - -“But it _is_ my room. Let me go, I say!” screamed the bird, struggling -to get free, and dabbing at me viciously with his great beak. - -“It is not your room,” I maintained; “and what is more, you are not -going to stay here,” and I pushed the creature towards the door. - -“We’ll soon see all about that,” shouted the Pelican, wrenching himself -from my grasp, and rushing at me with his beak wide open, and his wings -outstretched. - -He was an enormous bird, and I had a great struggle with him. We went -banging about the room, knocking over the furniture and making a -terrible racket. At last, however, I managed to get him near the door, -and giving a terrific shove I pushed him outside, and, pulling the door -to, quickly turned the key. - -I could hear Mr. Pelican slipping and stumbling about on the highly -polished floor of the corridor outside, and muttering indignantly. -Presently he came to the door, and banging with his beak, he cried, -“Look here! this is beyond a joke—let me in, I say—where do you -suppose I am going to sleep?” - -“Anywhere you like except here,” I replied, feeling that I had got the -best of it. “Go and perch or roost, or whatever you call it, on the -banisters, or sleep on the mat if you like—I don’t care what you do!” - -“Impertinent wretch!” yelled the bird. “You only wait till the morning. -I’ll pay you out;” and I could hear him muttering and mumbling in -an angry way as he waddled down the corridor to seek some other -resting-place. “What ridiculous nonsense it is,” I thought, as I -tumbled into bed shortly after this little episode; “these creatures -giving themselves such airs. No wonder the Wallypug is such a meek -little person if he has been subjected to this sort of treatment -all his life.” And pondering over the best method of altering the -extraordinary state of affairs, I dropped off to sleep. - -I do not know how long it may have been after this, but a terrific din, -this time in the courtyard below my window, caused me once more to -jump from my bed in alarm. I could hear a most unearthly yelling going -on, a babel of voices, and occasionally a resounding crash as though -something hollow had been violently struck. - -[Illustration: HE WAS INTERRUPTED BY A SHOWER OF MISSILES.] - -Pushing open the latticed windows I saw in the moonlight a little man -dressed in a complete suit of armor with an enormous shield, like a -dishcover, arranged over his head, playing the guitar, and endeavoring -to sing to its accompaniment. He was continually interrupted, however, -by a shower of missiles thrown from all of the windows overlooking the -courtyard, out of which angry heads of animals and other occupants of -the palace were thrust; he was surrounded by a miscellaneous collection -of articles which had evidently been thrown at him, and some of them, -had it not been for his suit of armor and the erection over his head, -would have caused him considerable injury. - -[Illustration: THE MUSICIAN TOOK TO HIS HEELS AND FLED.] - -He did not seem to mind them in the least, though, and continued -singing amid a perfect storm of boots, brushes, and bottles, as though -he was quite accustomed to such treatment: and it was only when an -irate figure, which somehow reminded me of his Majesty’s Sister-in-Law, -clad in white garments and flourishing a pair of tongs, appeared in -the courtyard, that he took to his heels and fled, pursued by the -white-robed apparition, till both disappeared beneath an archway at -the farther end of the courtyard. Most of the windows were thereupon -closed, and the disturbed occupants of the palace returned to their -rest. I was just about to close my lattice too, when I caught sight of -a familiar figure at the adjoining window. It was my old friend A. -Fish, Esq. - -“Oh! id’s you iz id,” he cried. “You _have_ cub thed, I heard that you -were egspegded.” - -“Yes, here I am,” I replied. “How are you? How is your cold?” - -“Oh, id’s quide cured, thags; dote you dotice how butch better I speak?” - -“I’m very glad to hear it, I’m sure,” I replied, waiving the question -and trying to keep solemn. “What’s all this row about?” - -“Oh! thad’s the troubadour, up to his old gabes agaid; he’s ad awful -dusadce. I’ll tell you aboud hib in the bordig—good dight.” And A. -Fish, Esq., disappeared from view. - - - - -CHAPTER IV. - -LATE FOR BREAKFAST. - - -I AWOKE very early in the morning, just as it was daylight, and being -unable to get to sleep again amid my strange surroundings, I arose and -crept down-stairs as noiselessly as possible, intending to go for a -long walk before breakfast. - -At the bottom of the stairs I came upon a strange-looking white object, -which, upon closer inspection, turned out to be the Pelican, asleep on -the floor. - -He was not sleeping as any respectable bird would have done, with his -head tucked under his wing; but was lying stretched out on a rug in the -hall, with his head resting on a cushion. His enormous beak was wide -open, and he was snoring violently, and muttering uneasily in his sleep. - -[Illustration: THE PELICAN WAS SNORING VIOLENTLY.] - -I did not disturb him for fear lest he should make a noise; but -hurrying past him I made my way to the hall door, which after a little -difficulty I succeeded in unfastening. An ancient-looking turtle with a -white apron was busily cleaning the steps, and started violently as I -made my appearance at the door. - -“Bless my shell and fins!” he muttered; “what’s the creature wandering -about this time of the morning for; they’ll be getting up in the -middle of the night next. Just mind where you’re treading, please!” he -called out. “The steps have been cleaned, and I don’t want to have to -do them all over again.” - -I managed to get down without doing much damage, and then remarked -pleasantly: - -“Good morning; have you——” - -“No, I haven’t,” interrupted the Turtle snappishly; “and what’s more, I -don’t want to.” - -“What do you mean?” I inquired, in surprise. - -“Soap!” was the reply. - -“I don’t understand you,” I exclaimed. - -“You’re an advertisement for somebody’s soap, aren’t you?” asked the -Turtle. - -“Certainly not,” I replied, indignantly. - -“Your first remark sounded very much like it,” said the Turtle -suspiciously. “‘Good morning, have you used——’” - -“I wasn’t going to say that at all,” I interrupted. “I was merely -going to ask if you could oblige me with a light.” - -“Oh, that’s another thing entirely,” said the Turtle, handing me some -matches from his waistcoat pocket, and accepting a cigarette in return. -“But really we have got so sick of those advertisement catchwords since -the Doctor-in-Law returned from London with agencies for all sorts of -things, that we hate the very sound of them. We are continually being -told to ‘Call a spade a spade,’ which will be ‘grateful and comforting’ -to ‘an ox in a teacup’ who is ‘worth a guinea a box,’ and who ‘won’t be -happy till he gets it.’” - -“It must be very trying,” I murmured sympathetically. - -“Oh, it is,” remarked the Turtle. “Well,” he continued in a -business-like tone, “I’m sorry you can’t stop—good morning.” - -“I didn’t say anything about going,” I ejaculated. - -“Oh, didn’t you? Well, I did then,” said the Turtle emphatically. “Move -on, please!” - -“You’re very rude,” I remarked. - -“Think so?” said the Turtle pleasantly. “That’s all right -then—good-by,” and he flopped down on his knees and resumed his -scrubbing. - -[Illustration: THE TURTLE FLOPPED DOWN ON HIS KNEES AND RESUMED HIS -SCRUBBING.] - -There was nothing for me to do but to walk on, and seeing a -quaint-looking old rose garden in the distance, I decided to go over -and explore. - -I was walking slowly along the path leading to it, when I heard a -curious clattering noise behind me, and turning around I beheld the -Troubadour, still in his armor, dragging a large standard rosebush -along the ground. - -“As if it were not enough,” he grumbled, “to be maltreated as I am -every night, without having all this trouble every morning. I declare -it is enough to make you throw stones at your grandfather.” - -“What’s the matter?” I ventured to ask of the little man. - -“Matter?” was the reply. “Why, these wretched rosebushes, they _will_ -get out their beds at night, and wander about. I happened to leave the -gate open last night, and this one got out, and goodness knows where he -would have been by this time if I hadn’t caught him meandering about -near the Palace.” - -“Why! I’ve never heard of such a thing as a rosebush walking about,” I -exclaimed in surprise. - -[Illustration: “IN YOU GO!”] - -“Never heard of a——. Absurd!” declared the Troubadour, incredulously. -“Of course they do. That’s what you have hedges and fences around -the gardens for, isn’t it? Why, you can’t have been in a garden at -night-time, or you wouldn’t talk such nonsense. All the plants are -allowed to leave their beds at midnight. They are expected to be back -again by daylight, though, and not go wandering about goodness knows -where like this beauty,” and he shook the rosebush violently. - -“In you go,” he continued, digging a hole with the point of his mailed -foot, and sticking the rosebush into it. - -“Hullo!” he exclaimed, going up to another one, at the foot of which -were some broken twigs and crumpled leaves. “You’ve been fighting, have -you? I say, it’s really too bad!” - -“But what does it matter to you?” I inquired. “It’s very sad, no doubt, -but I don’t see why you should upset yourself so greatly about it.” - -“Well, you see,” was the reply, “I’m the head gardener here as well as -Troubadour, and so am responsible for all these things. I do troubing -as an extra,” he explained. “Three shillings a week and my armor. -Little enough, isn’t it, considering the risk?” - -“Well, the office certainly does not seem overpopular, judging from -last night,” I laughed. “Who were you serenading?” - -“Oh, any one,” was the reply. “I give it to them in turns. If any one -offends me in the daytime I pay them out at night, see? - -“I serenaded the Sister-in-Law mostly, but I shall give that up. She -doesn’t play fair. I don’t mind people shying things at me in the -least, for you see I’m pretty well protected; but when it comes to -chivying me round the garden with a pair of tongs, it’s more than I -bargained for. Look out! Here comes the Wallypug,” he continued. - -Sure enough his Majesty was walking down the path, attended by A. Fish, -Esq., who was wearing a cap and gown and carrying a huge book. - -“Ah! good morning—good morning,” cried his Majesty, hurrying towards -me. “I’d no idea you were out and about so early. I’m just having my -usual morning lesson.” - -“Yes,” said A. Fish, Esq., smiling, and offering me a fin. “Ever sidse -I god rid of by cold I’ve been teaching the Wallypug elocutiod. We have -ad ‘our every bordig before breakfast, ad he’s geddig on spledidly.” - -“I’m sure his Majesty is to be congratulated on having so admirable an -instructor,” I remarked, politely, if not very truthfully. - -[Illustration: “His Majesty was walking down the path, attended by -A. Fish, Esq., who was wearing a cap and gown and carrying a huge -book.”—Page 58. - _Wallypugland._] - -“Thags,” said A. Fish, Esq., looking very pleased. “I say, Wallypug, -recide that liddle thig frob Richard III., jusd to show hib how well -you cad do id, will you? You doe thad thig begiddidg ’Ad ’orse, ad -’orse, by kigdob for ad ’orse.’” - -“Yes, go on, Wallypug!” chimed in the Troubadour, indulgently. - -“Oh, I don’t know,” said his Majesty, simpering nervously. “I’m afraid -I should break down.” - -“Doe you wondt, doe you wondt,” said A. Fish, Esq. “Cub alog, try id.” - -So his Majesty stood up, with his hands folded in front of him, and was -just about to begin, when a bell in a cupola on the top of the palace -began to ring violently. - -“Good gracious, the breakfast bell! We shall be late,” cried the -Wallypug, anxiously grasping my hand and beginning to run towards the -palace. - -A. Fish, Esq., also shuffled along behind us as quickly as possible, -taking three or four wriggling steps, and then giving a funny little -hop with his tail, till, puffing and out of breath, we arrived at the -palace just as the bell stopped ringing. - -His Majesty hastily rearranged his disordered crown, and led the way -into the dining hall. - -A turtle carrying a large dish just inside the door whispered warningly -to the Wallypug as we entered, “Look out! You’re going to catch it,” -and hurried away. - -A good many creatures were seated at the table which ran down -the center of the room, and at the head of which his Majesty’s -Sister-in-Law presided, with a steaming urn before her. The -Doctor-in-Law occupied a seat near by, and I heard him remark: - -“They are two minutes late, madame. I hope you are not going to -overlook it,” to which the lady replied, grimly, “You leave that to -me.” - -“Sit there,” she remarked coldly, motioning me to a vacant seat, and -the Wallypug and A. Fish, Esq., subsided into the two other unoccupied -chairs on the other side of the table. - - - - -CHAPTER V. - -THE TRIAL. - - -FOR a moment nobody spoke. The Wallypug sat back in a huddled heap in -his chair, looking up into Madame’s face with a scared expression. A. -Fish unconcernedly began to eat some steaming porridge from a plate in -front of him—and I sat still and waited events. - -A band of musicians in the gallery at the end of the hall were playing -somewhat discordantly, till Madame turned around and called out in an -angry voice: - -“Just stop that noise, will you? I can’t hear myself speak.” - -[Illustration: “STOP THAT NOISE!”] - -The musicians immediately left off playing with the exception of an -old hippopotamus, playing a brass instrument, who being deaf, and -very near-sighted, had neither heard what had been said nor observed -that the others had stopped. With his eyes fixed on the music stand -in front of him, he kept up a long discordant tootling on his own -account, gravely beating time with his head and one foot. - -His Majesty’s Sister-in-Law turned around furiously once or twice, and -then seeing that the creature did not leave off, she threw a teacup at -his head, and followed it up with the sugar basin. - -The latter hit him, and hastily dropping his instrument, he looked over -the top of his spectacles in surprise. - -Perceiving that the others had left off playing, he apparently realized -what had happened, and meekly murmuring, “I beg your pardon,” he leaned -forward with one foot up to his ear, to hear what was going on. - -“I’m waiting to know what you have to say for yourselves,” resumed -Madame, addressing the Wallypug and myself. - -“The traid was late, add there was a fog od the lide,” explained A. -Fish, Esq., mendaciously, with his mouth full of hot porridge. - -“A likely story!” said the good lady sarcastically. “A very convenient -excuse, I must say; but that train’s been late too many times recently -to suit me. I don’t believe a word of what you are saying.” - -“If I might venture a suggestion,” said the Doctor-in-Law, sweetly, -“I would advise that they should all be mulcted in heavy fines, and I -will willingly undertake the collection of the money for a trifling -consideration.” - -“It’s too serious a matter for a fine,” said the Madame severely. “What -do you mean by it?” she demanded, glaring at me furiously. - -“Well, I’m sure we are all very sorry,” I remarked, “but I really do -not see that being two minutes late for breakfast is such a dreadful -affair after all.” - -“Oh! you don’t, don’t you?” said the Sister-in-Law, working herself up -into a terrible state of excitement; “Well, I do, then. Do you suppose -that you are going to do just as you please here? Do you think that I -am going to allow myself to be brow-beaten and imposed upon by a mere -man——” - -“Who hasn’t a hat to his back,” interposed the Doctor-in-Law, -spitefully. - -“Hold your tongue,” said the Sister-in-Law. “I’m dealing with him now. -Do you suppose,” she went on, “that I am to be openly defied by a -ridiculous Wallypug and a person with a cold in his head?” - -“I’b sure I havn’d,” declared A. Fish, Esq., indignantly. “By code’s -beed cured this last bunth or bore.” - -“Humph, sounds like it, doesn’t it?” said the lady, tauntingly. -“However, we’ll soon settle this matter. We’ll have a public meeting, -and see who’s to be master, you or I.” - -“Hooray, public meeting! Public meeting!” shouted all the creatures -excitedly. - -“Yes, and at once,” said the Sister-in-Law impressively, getting up and -leaving the table, regardless of the fact that scarcely anybody had as -yet had any breakfast. - -The rest of the creatures followed her out of the room. - -When they had quite disappeared and the Wallypug, A. Fish, Esq., and -myself were left alone, I thought that we might as well help ourselves -to some breakfast. So I poured out some of the coffee, which we found -excellent, and had just succeeded in persuading his Majesty to try a -little bread and butter, when some crocodiles appeared at the door and -announced: “You are commanded to attend the trial at once.” - -“What trial?” I asked. - -“Your own,” was the reply. “You and the Wallypug are to be tried for -‘Contempt of Sister-in-Law,’ and A. Fish, Esq., is subpœnaed as a -witness.” - -“Oh, dear! Oh, dear!” said the poor Wallypug, wringing his hands. “I -know what that means. Whatever shall we do?” - -“Dever bide, old chap. I do the best I cad to get you off,” said A. -Fish, Esq. “Cub alog, it will odly bake badders worse to delay.” - -So we allowed ourselves to be taken in charge by the crocodiles, and -led to the Public Hall, his Majesty and myself being loaded with chains. - -We found the Sister-in-Law and the Doctor-in-Law seated at the judges’ -bench when we entered. The Sister-in-Law wore a judge’s red robe, and a -long, flowing wig under her usual head-dress, and the Doctor-in-Law was -provided with a slate, pencil, and sponge. - -[Illustration: “SILENCE IN COURT!” SCREAMED THE OSTRICH.] - -We were conducted to a kind of dock on one side of the bench, and on -the other side appeared what afterwards transpired to be the witness -box. The body of the hall was crowded with animals, craning their necks -to catch a glimpse of us. - -“Silence in court,” screamed out a gaily-dressed ostrich, and the trial -began. - -“We’ll take the man creature first,” said the Sister-in-Law, regarding -me contemptuously. “Now then, speak up! What have you got to say for -yourself?” - -“There appears to be—” I began. - -“Silence in court,” shouted the ostrich, who was evidently an official. - -“Surely I may be allowed to explain,” I protested. - -“Silence in court,” shouted the bird again. - -I gave it up and remained silent. “Call the first witness,” remarked -the Sister-in-Law impatiently, and the Turtle, whom I had seen cleaning -the steps in the morning, walked briskly up into the witness-box. - -“Well, Turtle, what do you know about this man?” was the first question. - -“So please your Importance, I was cleaning my steps very early this -morning, when the prisoner opened the door in a stealthy manner and -crept out very quietly. ‘Ho!’ thinks I, ‘this ’ere man’s up to no -good,’ and so I keeps him in conversation a little while, but his -language—oh!—and what with one thing and another and noticing that he -hadn’t a hat, I told him he had better move on. I saw him walk over to -the rose garden and afterwards join the Wallypug and Mr. Fish. I think -that’s all, except—ahem—that I missed a small piece of soap.” - -“Soap?” said the Doctor-in-Law, elevating his eyebrows. “This is -important—er—er—what kind of soap?” - -“Yellow,” said the Turtle. “Fourpence a pound.” - -“Hum!” said the Doctor-in-Law, “very mysterious, but not at all -surprising from what I know of this person—call the next witness.” - -The next witness was the Cockatoo, who scrambled into the box in a -great fluster. - -“He’s a story-teller, and a pickpocket, and a backbiter, and a fibber, -and a bottle-washer,” she screamed excitedly, “and a heartless -deceiver, and an organ-grinder, so there!” And she danced out of the -witness-box again excitedly, muttering, “Down with him, down with him, -the wretch,” all the way back to her seat. - -“Ah, that will about settle him, I fancy,” remarked the Doctor-in-Law, -putting down some figures on his slate and counting them up. - -“What are you doing?” demanded the Sister-in-Law. - -“Summing up,” was the reply. “The judges always sum up in England, you -know; that’s thirty-two pounds he owes. Shall I collect it?” - -“Wait a minute till I pass the sentence,” said the Sister-in-Law. - -“Prisoner at the bar,” she continued, “you have since your arrival here -been given every latitude.” - -“And longitude,” interrupted the Doctor-in-Law. - -“And have taken advantage of the fact to disobey the laws of the land -in every possible way. You have heard the evidence against you, and I -may say more clear proof could not have been given. It appears that you -are a thoroughly worthless character, and it is with great pleasure I -order you to be imprisoned in the deepest dungeon beneath the castle -moat, and fined thirty-two pounds and costs.” - -Then pointing to me tragically, she called out, “Officers! take away -that Bauble!” And I was immediately seized by two of the crocodiles, -preparatory to being taken below. - - - - -CHAPTER VI. - -HIS MAJESTY IS DEPOSED. - - -“STOP a minute!” cried Madame, as I was being led away. “We may as well -settle the Wallypug’s affair at the same time and get rid of them both -at once. Put the creature into the dock.” - -His Majesty was hustled forward, looking very nervous and white, as he -stood trembling at the bar, while Madame regarded him fiercely. - -“Aren’t you ashamed of yourself?” she demanded. - -“Ye-e-s!” stammered his Majesty, though what the poor little fellow had -to be ashamed of was more than I could tell. - -“I should think so, indeed,” commented the lady. “Now then, call the -first witness.” - -The first witness was A. Fish, Esq., who coughed importantly as he -stepped up into the box with a jaunty air. “Let’s see, what’s your -name?” asked the Doctor-in-Law, with a supercilious stare. Now, this -was absurd, for, of course, he knew as well as I did what the Fish’s -name was; but as I heard him whisper to Madame, the judges in England -always pretend not to know _anything_, and he was doing the same. - -“By dabe is A. Fish, you doe thadt well edough,” was the answer. - -“Don’t be impertinent, or I shall commit you for contempt,” said the -Doctor-in-Law, severely. “Now then—ah—you are a reptile of some sort, -I believe, are you not?” - -“Certainly dot!” was indignant reply. - -“Oh! I thought you were. Er—what do you do for a living?” - -“I’b a teacher of elocutiod add a lecturer,” said A. Fish, Esq., -importantly. - -“Oh! indeed. Teacher of elocution, are you? And how many pupils have -you, pray?” - -“Well, ad presend I’ve odly wud,” replied A. Fish, Esq., “and that the -Wallypug.” - -“Oh! the Wallypug’s a pupil of yours, is he? I suppose you find him -very stupid, don’t you?” - -“Doe, I don’t!” said A. Fish, Esq., loyally. “He’s a very clever pupil, -ad he’s gettig od splendidly with his recitig.” - -“Oh! is he, indeed; and what do you teach him, may I ask?” - -“I’ve taught hib ‘Twinkle, twinkle, little star,’ ad ‘Billy’s dead ad -gone to glory,’ ad several other things frob Shakespeare.” - -“Shakespeare? hum—ha—Shakespeare? I seem to have heard the name -before. Who is he?” - -“A great poet, born in England in 1564, m’lud,” explained one of the -Crocodiles. - -“Really! He must be getting quite an old man by now,” said the -Doctor-in-Law, vaguely. - -“He’s dead,” said A. Fish, Esq., solemnly. - -“Dear me! poor fellow! what did he die of?” - -“Don’t ask such a lot of silly questions,” interrupted the -Sister-in-Law, impatiently; “get on with the business. What has A. Fish -to say on behalf of the Wallypug? that is the question.” - -“He’s gettig od very dicely with his recitig,” insisted A. Fish, Esq. -“He was repeatig a speech from Richard III. to us this bordig whed the -breakfast bell rang, ad that’s why we were late at table.” - -“Oh! that’s the reason, is it?” said the Sister-in-Law. “Bah! I’ve no -patience with a man at his time of life repeating poetry. Positively -childish, I call it. What was the rubbish?” she demanded, turning to -the Wallypug. - -“A horse, a horse, my kingdom for a horse,” began his Majesty, feebly. - -“What!” shrieked the Sister-in-Law, starting up from her seat. “Say -that again!” - -“‘A-a horse, a horse, my-my kingdom for a horse,’” stammered the -Wallypug, nervously. - -“Traitor! Monster!” cried the Sister-in-Law furiously. “Hear him!” -she screamed. “He actually has the effrontery to tell us to our faces -that he is willing to sell the whole of this kingdom for a horse. Oh! -it is too much! the heartless creature! Oh-h!” and the lady sank back -and gasped hysterically. At this there was a terrible uproar in the -court—the animals stood up on the seats, frantically gesticulating -and crying: “Traitor!” “Down with the Wallypug!” “Off with his head!” -“Banish him!” “Send him to jail!” while above all could be heard the -Cockatoo screaming: - -“I told you so. I told you so! Down with the Wallypug! Off with his -crown! Dance on his sceptre, and kick his orb round the town.” - -The poor Wallypug threw himself on his knees and called out -imploringly, “It’s all a mistake,” and I tried in vain to make myself -heard above the uproar. - -[Illustration: “TRAITOR! MONSTER!” “OFF WITH HIS HEAD!”] - -The whole assembly seemed to have taken leave of their senses, and for -a few moments the utmost confusion prevailed. The creatures nearest to -the Wallypug seemed as though they would tear him to pieces in their -fury, and if it had not been for his jailers, the Crocodiles, I am -convinced they would have done him some injury. “This is outrageous,” -I managed to shout at last. “You are making all this disturbance for -nothing. What the Wallypug said was merely a quotation from one of -Shakespeare’s plays.” - -“Oh, it’s all very well to try and blame it on to poor Shakespeare, -when you know very well he’s dead and can’t defend himself,” was -Madame’s reply. “That’s your artfulness. I’ve no doubt you are quite as -bad as the Wallypug himself, and probably put him up to it.” - -“Yes. Down with him! Down with the hatless traitor!” screamed the -Cockatoo. - -And despite our protests the Wallypug and myself were loaded with -chains and marched off by the Crocodiles, his Majesty having first -been robbed of his crown, sceptre, and orb, and other insignia of -Royalty by the Doctor-in-Law, who hadn’t a kind word to say for his -old sovereign, and who seemed positively to rejoice at his Majesty’s -downfall. I was highly indignant with his heartless ingratitude, but -could do positively nothing, while all of my protests were drowned in -the babel of sounds made by the furious creatures in the body of the -court. - -[Illustration: THE WALLYPUG WAS LOADED WITH CHAINS AND MARCHED OFF BY -THE CROCODILES.] - -After being taken from the dock I was marched off in one direction -and his Majesty in another, and the last view I had of the Wallypug -was that of the poor little fellow being limply dragged along by two -Crocodiles in the direction of the dungeons. I was conducted to the top -room of a tower, in an unfrequented part of the palace, and there left -to my reflections, without any one to speak to for the remainder of the -day. - -Towards the evening I heard some shouting at the bottom of the tower, -and looking out as well as I could through the barred window, I saw -the Doctor-in-Law rushing about with a packet of newspapers under one -arm—and heard him calling out, in a loud voice, “Special edition! -Arrest of the Wallypug! Shocking discovery! The Wallypug a traitor! -Sister-in-Law prostrate with excitement! The Hatless Man implicated!” -He was doing a roaring trade, as nearly everybody was buying papers -of him, and excited groups of animals were standing about eagerly -discussing what was evidently the cause of a tremendous sensation in -the kingdom of Why. - -[Illustration: “I saw the Doctor-in-Law rushing about with a packet -of newspapers under one arm, calling out in a loud voice, ‘Special -edition! Arrest of the Wallypug!’”—Page 82. - _Wallypugland._] - - - - -CHAPTER VII. - -FOILED! - - -I STOOD at the barred window for some time, watching the Doctor-in-Law -rushing about with his papers, and then started back as a huge and -disreputable-looking black Crow settled on the stone ledge outside. - -I soon recognized him as being the bird who had behaved so -impertinently to me on my first arrival at Why. - -“Well!” he exclaimed, squeezing himself through the iron bars, and -staring at me over the tops of his spectacles. “You have got yourself -into a pretty muddle now, I must say. I should think you are thoroughly -ashamed of yourself, aren’t you?” - -“Indeed, I’m not,” I replied. “I’m not conscious of having done -anything to be ashamed of, and as for that trial, why it was a -mere farce, and perfectly absurd,” and I laughed heartily at the -recollection of it. - -“H’m! I’m glad you find it so amusing,” remarked the bird -sententiously. “You won’t be so light-hearted about it to-morrow if -they treat you as the papers say they purpose doing.” - -“Why, what do they intend to do then?” I exclaimed, my curiosity -thoroughly aroused. - -“Execute you,” said the Crow solemnly. “And serve you jolly well right, -too.” - -“What nonsense!” I cried, “they can’t execute me for doing nothing.” - -“Oh, you think so, do you? Didn’t you instigate the Wallypug to become -a traitor, and sell the kingdom for the sake of a horse?” said the -Crow, referring to his paper. - -“Certainly not!” I cried emphatically. - -“Well, they say you did, anyhow,” said the Crow, “and they intend to -chop off your head and the Wallypug’s too. It won’t matter you not -having a hat then,” he continued grimly. - -“But you don’t mean it, surely!” I exclaimed. “They certainly can’t be -so ridiculous as to treat the affair seriously.” - -“Well, you see,” said the bird, “things without doubt look very black -against you. In the first place what did you want to come here at all -for?” - -“I’m sure I wish I hadn’t,” I remarked. - -“Just so! So does every one else,” said the Crow rudely. “Then, when -you did come, you were without a hat, which is in itself a very -suspicious circumstance.” - -“Why?” I interrupted. - -“Respectable people don’t go gadding about without hats,” said the bird -contemptuously, turning up his beak. “And then, the first morning -after your arrival you must needs go prowling about the grounds before -any one else was up.” - -[Illustration: “WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO LEAVE ME IN YOUR WILL?”] - -“What are you going to leave me in your will?” he continued -insinuatingly. - -“Nothing at all,” I declared. “And besides, I’m not going to make a -will. I don’t intend to let them kill me without a good struggle, I can -tell you.” - -“H’m, you might as well let me have your watch and chain. It will -only go to the Doctor-in-Law if you don’t. He is sure to want to grab -everything. I expect he will want to seize the throne when the Wallypug -is executed. I saw him just now trying on the crown, and smirking and -capering about in front of the looking-glass.” - -“The Doctor-in-Law is an odious little monster,” I exclaimed. - -“Oh, very well,” cried the Crow, wriggling through the bars, “I’ll -just go and tell him what you say. I’ve no doubt he will be delighted -to hear your opinion of him—and perhaps it will induce him to add -something to your punishment. I hope so, I’m sure—ha—ha!” - -And the wretched ill-omened bird flew away laughing derisively. - -I could not help feeling rather uncomfortable at the turn which events -had taken, for there was no knowing to what lengths the extraordinary -inhabitants of this remarkable place might go, and if it had really -been decided that the poor Wallypug and myself should be executed on -the morrow, then there was no time to be lost in our efforts to effect -an escape. - -I was puzzling over the matter, and wondering what was best to be done, -when I heard a bell ringing at the other end of the apartment. - -“Ting-a-ling-a-ling-a-ling,” for all the world like the ring of a -telephone call bell. - -I ran across the room, and sure enough, there was a telephone fitted up -in the far corner. I hastily put the receiver to my ears, and heard a -squeaky voice inquiring: - -“Are you there? Are you 987654321?” - -“Yes,” I called out, for I thought that I might as well be this number -as any other. - -“Well,” the voice replied, in an agitated way, “Aunt Kesiah has done it -at last.” - -“What?” I shouted. - -[Illustration: “Are you there?” cried A. Fish, Esq. “Yes; what is it?” -I asked.—Page 89. - _Wallypugland._] - -“Proposed to the curate, and so all those slippers will be wasted. -Don’t you think we had better—” - -But I rang off and stopped the connection, for I felt sure that the -communication was not intended for me. - -Presently there was another ring at the bell, and this time I found -myself connected with the exchange. I knew that it was the exchange, -because they were all quarreling so. - -“It was all your fault!” “No it wasn’t.” “Yes it was.” “Well, you -know A. Fish, Esq., is 13,579—so there.” “Yes, and he wanted to be -connected with the West Tower in the Palace.” - -“Connect me with 13,579, please,” I called. - -And a moment or two afterwards I heard a well-known voice sounding -through the instrument, and I knew that A. Fish, Esq., was at the other -end. - -“Are you there?” he cried. - -“Yes; what is it?” I asked. - -“There isn’t a biddit to spare,” he gasped; “lift up the loose stode -dear the fireplace, ad you will find a secret staircase leadig to the -dudgeod, where the Wallypug is ibprisod; hurry for your life, he has -discovered a way of escape.” - -I dropped the receiver, and flew to the fireplace. Yes, sure enough, -there was the loose stone that A. Fish, Esq., had spoken of, and having -raised it with some difficulty I found a narrow spiral staircase -beneath, leading down into mysterious depths. - -I plunged into the darkness, and after walking round and round, and -down and down, for a considerable time I saw a faint light at the -other end. I hurried forward as quickly as I could, and found myself -in a dimly-lighted dungeon. The Wallypug was here alone, and was -busily cramming everything he could lay his hands on into an enormous -carpet-bag. - -“Thank goodness, you have come!” he exclaimed, in a terrible fluster, -when he saw me. “I was afraid you would be too late. We must escape at -once if we would save our necks. Fortunately, I have just remembered -that this dungeon is connected with the shute which the late Wallypug -had constructed between here and Ling Choo, in China, which is on the -other side of the world—it is enormously long and very steep, but -quite safe—we must use it in order to get away. We are to be executed -in the morning if we stay here, so I am informed; therefore, we must -lose no time. I have just finished packing up. Ah! What’s that?” he -exclaimed, listening intently. - -“Quick! they are coming!” he cried, as sounds were heard in the passage -outside the dungeon door; and touching a spring, an enormous opening -appeared in the wall. His Majesty gave me a sudden push, which sent -me sprawling on to a smooth and very steep incline, and jumping down -himself, we slid rapidly away into the unknown. - -[Illustration: WE SLID RAPIDLY DOWN THE SHUTE.] - -That we were only just in time was evidenced by the cries of rage and -disappointment which pursued us from the dungeon, as the Doctor-in-Law -and the other creatures saw us escape from their clutches, and we could -hear the Cockatoo’s shrill cries grow fainter and fainter as we sped -swiftly down the shute towards Ling Choo. - - - - -CHAPTER VIII. - -THE LITTLE BLUE PEOPLE. - - -DOWN, and down, and down we flew, quicker and quicker each moment. -The shute was as smooth as glass, and grew steeper than ever as we -descended. His Majesty was a little way behind me, but the terrific -rate at which we were traveling made it impossible for us to hold -any conversation. Once or twice I shouted out something to him, but -receiving no reply I soon gave that up. The attitude in which I was -slipping down the shute was a most uncomfortable one, but after a -considerable time I managed to turn over on to my back, and eventually -to twist around, till, at any rate, I was traveling feet foremost, -which was some slight consolation, although naturally I was dreadfully -concerned as to what was to be our fate at the other end of our -journey. “Slipping along at this rate,” I thought, “we shall probably -be smashed to a jelly when we do arrive at the bottom. At any rate I -shall, for the Wallypug and the carpet-bag are bound to descend upon my -devoted head.” - -By and by I began to grow very hungry, and then came another dismal -thought. Supposing this extraordinary trip continued for any length of -time, how should we get on for food? - -We seemed to be traveling through a kind of tunnel, with very smooth -walls on either side. The Wallypug had said that we were bound for -China, and that that country was on the other side of the world. If so, -then we were in for a pretty long journey. I twisted my head around, -and tried to get a glimpse of his Majesty, who was only a few yards -above me. I could see that he was struggling to get something out -of the carpet-bag, and a few minutes afterwards a little packet of -sandwiches came whizzing past my head. I managed to catch it as it fell -upon the highly-polished boards by stretching out one leg just in time -to prevent it from slipping too far. - -[Illustration: I COULD SEE HE WAS STRUGGLING TO GET SOMETHING OUT OF -THE CARPET-BAG.] - -The sandwiches were very good, and I enjoyed them immensely, and for -a few moments almost forgot our strange surroundings. I was soon, -however, recalled to a sense of our condition by the fact that we -suddenly emerged from the tunnel into broad daylight, the shute -apparently descending the steep sides of a high mountain. As soon as my -eyes became accustomed to the light I noticed, to my great surprise, -that everything in this new country was of a deep rich blue color. The -rocks on the mountain side, the strange-looking trees, and even the -birds—of which I could see several flying about—were all of the same -unusual tint. - -I had hardly noticed this fact, as we flew down the side of the -mountain, when I felt myself suddenly pulled up with a jerk, and lifted -high into the air in a most unaccountable manner, and when, after -a moment or two, I recovered from the shock, I found that both the -Wallypug and myself were suspended from a line at the end of two long -fishing-rods which were fastened into a quaint little bridge crossing -the shute. - -There we hung, dangling and bobbing about in front of each other in the -most ridiculous way, the dear Wallypug still clinging to his carpet-bag -with one hand, while in the other he clutched a half-eaten sandwich. -I shall never forget his Majesty’s surprised expression when he found -himself hanging up the air in this unexpected way. - -“Like being a bird, isn’t it?” he remarked when at last he found a -voice. - -“H’m, not much,” I replied. “I feel more like a fish at the end of this -line. I wish some one would come and help us off. There’s a hook, or -something, sticking into my shoulder, and it hurts no end.” You see -there was evidently something at the end of the lines which had caught -into our clothes, and the hook, or whatever it was, just touched my -shoulder. It did not hurt very much, but just enough to make me feel -uncomfortable. - -[Illustration: “I wonder where we are,” said the Wallypug, looking -about him. “What a funny colour everything is, to be sure.”—Page 98. - _Wallypugland._] - -“I wonder where we are,” said the Wallypug, looking about him. “What a -funny color everything is, to be sure.” - -“Yes, isn’t it?” I replied. And truly it was a most remarkable scene. -There was a curious little kind of temple in the distance and a number -of most extraordinary-looking trees; and these, and the grass, and, in -fact, everything that could be seen, were of a bright blue tint. - -“I know what those trees are called,” said the Wallypug, pointing to -some remarkable looking ones, with a lot of large blue globes on the -branches instead of leaves. - -“What?” I asked. - -“Gombobble trees,” said his Majesty. “I’ve seen pictures of them -before.” - -“Where?” I asked, more for the sake of something to say than for -anything else. - -“On our willow-pattern plates at home,” said his Majesty. “There were -those and the wiggle-woggely trees, you know.” - -“I wonder,” he continued speculatively, “if by any chance we are there.” - -“What do you mean?” I asked. - -“I wonder if this is the place which is shown on the willow-pattern -plates,” said his Majesty. - -Before I could reply we heard an excited exclamation from the bank, -and turning around as well as we could we saw two curious little blue -people dressed in flowing blue costumes. - -“Oh!” they exclaimed, when they saw us, throwing up their hands in a -comical little way, “we’ve caught something. What funny things! What -are they?” - -“I wonder if they bite,” cried the shorter of the two. - -“Do you bite, you funny things, you?” cried the other, shaking her head -at us. - -“No, of course not,” said the Wallypug. “Help us to get down, will you, -please?” - -“Not yet,” said both of the little blue creatures, shaking their heads -simultaneously. “What are your names?” - -[Illustration: “OH!” THEY EXCLAIMED, “WHAT ARE THEY?”] - -“I’m the Wallypug,” explained his Majesty graciously, “and this -gentleman is——” - -“He, he, he! He, he, he! He, he, he!” giggled the little blue people. -“They’re Wallypugs. Two great big fat Wallypugs. Oh, oh! what funny -things. Let’s go and fetch Ho-lor.” And they ran off as fast as their -little blue legs would carry them. - - - - -CHAPTER IX. - -THE WALLYPUG RECOVERS HIS CROWN. - - -HIS Majesty and myself stared at each other in dismay. Our position was -growing more and more uncomfortable every moment, and, added to this, I -had a growing impression that the rods to which we were attached would -sooner or later break with our weight. - -“Well! I do think that they might have helped us off the hooks, at any -rate,” grumbled his Majesty, discontentedly. - -“So do I,” I rejoined, and was about to add something else when my -attention was attracted to the peculiar behavior of the two blue birds -which we had previously noticed circling about over our heads. - -They were wheeling round and round in a most eccentric manner, and as -they drew closer we could see that they were as singular in appearance -as they were in their manner. - -“Why, they’ve got ever so many wings!” cried his Majesty in surprise. - -“Go away!” he shouted, as one of them fluttered past his face. The -birds, however, were not to be got rid of so easily, and, uttering -shrill little cries, they hovered about over his Majesty’s head, every -now and then making a vicious dart at the sandwich which he still held -in one hand. - -“Oh! take them away!—take them away!” he shouted, dropping his -carpet-bag in alarm, and evidently forgetting that I was as incapable -as he was of driving them off. - -“Throw your sandwich away!” I shouted; “it’s that they are after, I -believe.” - -His Majesty did so, and we soon had the satisfaction of seeing the -birds squabbling over it on the bank at the side of the shute. - -[Illustration: “GO AWAY!” SHOUTED HIS MAJESTY.] - -“Fortunate I tied my bag to the string of my cloak, wasn’t it?” -remarked the Wallypug, when they had gone. “I should have lost it else. -Oh, look! What’s that coming down the shute?” he cried, as something -suddenly came rolling and bounding down the steep incline. - -“O—o—o—h!” he continued delightedly, as it stopped, caught in the -mouth of the carpet-bag which, attached to the cord of his Majesty’s -cloak, dangled down the shute. “Why, it’s my crown! They must have -thought that I wanted it, and sent it down after me. How very kind of -them. Wasn’t it?” - -I had my own opinions on the subject, and held my peace, for I felt -quite sure that it was not through any intentional kindness that the -crown had found its way to its proper owner. - -His Majesty very carefully drew up the carpet-bag with its precious -burden, and soon had the intense satisfaction of putting the crown of -Why on his royal head once more. - -“Oh!” he cried with a little sigh of satisfaction, “it does seem nice -to have it on again. I’m afraid that I should soon have caught a cold -in my head, like A. Fish, Esq., if I had gone without it much longer.” - -[Illustration: A LONG LINE OF CREATURES WAS COMING DOWN THE SHUTE.] - -“Gracious!” he cried, pointing excitedly towards the top of the shute, -“there’s something else coming down! Why it’s the Doctor-in-Law and -Madame. Oh!—and the Cockatoo—and—the Rabbit and the Mole. Bless me! -if the whole of Why isn’t coming along.” - -It was quite true; attached to a strong rope a long line of creatures -was coming down the shute, the Doctor-in-Law leading the way. - -He soon caught sight of us dangling at the end of our rods, and calling -out “Halt!” in a loud voice, he pulled at the rope as a sign that they -were to stop. This signal was passed along by the others, and the -Cockatoo, who was attached to the rope in a very uncomfortable manner, -gave a loud “squ-a-a-k” as the sudden jerk caused it to tighten about -her neck. - -The signal, however, managed somehow to reach those at the other end, -for the procession suddenly came to a standstill. - -“Oh, there you are then!” called out the Doctor-in-Law in a severe -voice. “Thought you had escaped us, I suppose.” - -The Cockatoo, in a voice choking with rage, and the tightened rope, -shrieked out, “Down with the traitors!” while the Rabbit passed the -word along, “It’s all right. We’ve found them.” - -“Just you come down and tie yourself to this rope at once!” called out -Madame, glaring fiercely at the Wallypug. - -“Shan’t!” shouted his Majesty defiantly, pushing his crown further on -to his head. - -“What!” screamed the good lady, in a terrible passion. “Do you dare to -rebel?” - -“Yes, I do,” called out his Majesty bravely. “I don’t believe you are -my sister-in-law at all, and I’m not going back to Why to be snubbed -and ill-treated for you or any one else—so there. You can’t get at me, -hanging up here, and I don’t mean to get down till you’re gone. Yah!” - -“Oh, we’ll soon see all about that,” called out the Doctor-in-Law, -working himself to the edge of the shute, and trying to climb up the -steep sides of the bank. - -We watched his endeavors with considerable anxiety, for if he did -succeed in getting on to the bank, it would be an easy matter for him -to get at us, by means of the bridge. The rope, however, by which he -was attached to the Sister-in-Law was not sufficiently long to enable -him to do this, and while he was unfastening it there was a sudden cry -in the direction of the tunnel, and a moment afterwards, screaming, -kicking, and struggling, the whole party rapidly disappeared down the -shute. - -The rope had given way! - -“He, he, he! Ha, ha!” laughed his Majesty, as the huddled mass vanished -in the distance. “What a lark! Oh what a muddle they will be in when -they reach the bottom.” - -I tried to imagine what would be the result, and came to the conclusion -that, uncomfortable as I was in my present position, I would rather be -where I was than attached to the rope with the others. - -In the meantime the little blue people, their curiosity evidently -aroused by the noise, were hurrying towards us as quickly as possible, -bringing with them a very stout blue person, who was waddling along, -being alternately pushed and pulled by the others in their eagerness to -reach us. - -“See, there they are!” cried the little lady whose name we afterwards -found out was Gra-Shus. “Oh my! Aren’t they a funny color?” - -“Shall we get them down?” asked the other, whose name was Mi-Hy. - -The little fat man regarded us critically, and said nothing for a -moment or two, then he nodded his head violently. - -“You’re sure you won’t bite?” said Mi-Hy, looking up into my face. - -“No, of course not. Don’t be silly,” I replied. - -Thereupon, after a great deal of pulling and pushing on the part of -Mi-Hy and Gra-Shus, the rods to which we were attached were swung -around, and the Wallypug and myself alighted, one on either side of the -bank. - -His Majesty smoothed his rumpled garments, and, adjusting his crown to -a more becoming angle, positively swaggered across the bridge to where -the three little blue people stood in a line to receive us. - -“This is Ho-Lor,” said Mi-Hy, pushing the little fat man forward, while -Gra-Shus bashfully hid behind the ample folds of his gorgeous blue -skirts. - -“How do you do?” asked his Majesty graciously. - -“Do what?” asked Ho-Lor, smilingly. - -“I mean, how are you?” explained the Wallypug. - -“You mean _what_ am I, I suppose?” said the little man, putting on a -puzzled expression. - -“No, I don’t,” said the Wallypug. “I mean just what I say—How are you?” - -“But I don’t understand,” replied Ho-Lor. “How am I what?” - -“His Majesty the Wallypug of Why,” I explained, “wishes to say, that he -hopes you are quite well.” - -[Illustration: His Majesty swaggered across the bridge to where the -three little blue people stood in a line to receive us.—Page 112. - _Wallypugland._] - -“Oh! I beg your pardon” said Ho-Lor. “How very stupid of me. But -you know, the fact is, we get such a lot of foreigners down here, -and they do ask such funny questions. A Frenchman we caught the -other day actually asked me how I carried myself. Wasn’t it rude of -him—considering my weight too?” - -“You’re a Wallypug, too, aren’t you?” asked Gra-Shus, looking smilingly -up into my face. - -“Oh, no!” I replied; “I am only his Majesty’s guest.” - -“His Majesty! Do you mean that?” said Mi-Hy, pointing to the Wallypug. - -The Wallypug drew himself up with an air of offended dignity. - -“I am not a ‘that’; I’m a kind of a king,” he explained, in a tone of -remonstrance. - -“O-ooh!” exclaimed the little blue people, falling down on their knees -and bowing their foreheads to the ground, with their hands stretched -out before them. “Pray forgive us, Majestuous Wallypug, we thought you -were only an ordinary person. You see we’ve never caught a king before. -Oh! don’t chop our heads off, will you?” - -[Illustration: “PRAY FORGIVE US,” EXCLAIMED THE BLUE PEOPLE.] - -“Of course not,” said his Majesty, kindly. - -“But kings always chop off people’s heads, don’t they?” cried the -little people, anxiously. - -“Oh dear no,” said the Wallypug. - -“Get up; or you’ll spoil your clothes. Could we have a cup of tea, -please? We are rather fatigued with our long journey.” - -The little blue people immediately jumped up and led the way to -where behind a clump of curious blue trees the quaintest little boat -you could possibly imagine was moored against the bank. A blue lake -stretched as far as the eye could reach, and a number of little islands -were dotted about it. On one, a little larger than the rest, a quaint -little blue pagoda could be seen. - - - - -CHAPTER X. - -THE HOME OF HO-LOR. - - -“I LIVE over there,” said Ho-Lor with pride, pointing to the island -with the pagoda on it. “Mi-Hy shall row us across, and Gra-Shus shall -make us some tea.” - -“Oh! yes,” said Gra-Shus clapping her hands. “And we’ll show Mr. -Majesty Wallypug our beautiful pet dog—won’t we?” - -It was impossible not to be interested in these quaint and -simple-minded little folk, and after we had all stepped into the little -boat and Mi-Hy had pushed off, his Majesty was soon chatting affably -with Ho-Lor, who explained that he was a mandarin of the Blue Button, -and ninety-eighth-cousin-twice-removed to the Emperor of China. - -We soon reached the opposite bank, and his Majesty having been -ceremoniously assisted out of the boat, we ascended a slight hill, and -soon found ourselves before Ho-Lor’s residence. To our great surprise -we found that it exactly resembled the building so familiar to all who -have seen a willow-pattern plate. - -The tall pillars at the portico, the quaintly-shaped curly roofs, the -little zig-zag fence running along the path, and the curious trees, all -seemed to be old friends—while two little islands, one of which was -connected to the mainland by a quaint bridge, completed the picture. - -The two birds, which had by this time finished squabbling about the -sandwich, were billing and cooing over our heads, and the sight of them -seemed suddenly to convince us of the identity of the spot. - -“Why, this must be the land of the Willow-pattern plate,” cried his -Majesty excitedly. - -“Yes, it is,” admitted Ho-Lor. “Don’t you think it is a very pretty -spot?” - -“Charming,” declared the Wallypug; “I have often wanted to come here.” - -“The real name of the place,” said Ho-Lor, “is Wer-har-wei, and it is -a portion of China; but come, you must see our little dog; I can hear -that Mi-Hy has gone to fetch him.” - -“His name is Kis-Smee,” said Gra-Shus, “and he is such a dear old -thing. We’ve had him ever since he was a puppy.” - -There was a sound of barking, and a confused clattering of chains, -which told of a dog being unloosed. A moment afterwards there came -bounding out of the house the most extraordinary-looking creature that -I have ever beheld. - -It was a very fat and atrociously hideous animal, bearing but slight -resemblance to a dog. Its enormous mouth wore a perpetual grin, and -was decorated at the corners with curious little scallops. It was -bandy-legged, and its hinder legs were much longer than the front ones. -Added to this, the skin on its haunches was wrinkled up into curious -kind of rosettes, while its tail was really all sorts of shapes. - -[Illustration: “Come along, good dog! come and speak to the pretty -Wallypugs.”—Page 119. - _Wallypugland._] - -This beautiful creature came careering down the steps, dragging Mi-Hy -with him, and was hailed with delight by Gra-Shus, who cried in -endearing tones: - -“Come along, good dog! Come and speak to the pretty Wallypugs. Good -Kis-Smee. Good dog, then!” - -His Majesty clutched my arm nervously, and retreating behind the -carpet-bag, regarded Kis-Smee with a certain amount of suspicion, while -I must confess to having experienced a slight feeling of uneasiness -myself. For if Kis-Smee took it into his ugly head to object to us, -there was no knowing what might be the result. - -There was no occasion for alarm, however, for Kis-Smee turned out to -be one of the mildest and best-behaved of dogs. - -He made great friends with the Wallypug at once, and clumsily gamboled, -or, as his Majesty explained it, “flumped,” about him in the most -friendly manner. - -“He doesn’t take to strangers as a rule,” said Ho-Lor, “but he -certainly seems to have taken a fancy to you.” - -“He is a beautiful creature,” said his Majesty, politely patting the -huge animal a little nervously. - -“Oh! I don’t know about that,” remarked Ho-Lor, looking very pleased -nevertheless. “He is of a very rare breed, though.” - -“What kind of dog do you call him?” I inquired. - -“He’s a smirkler dog,” replied Ho-Lor proudly. - -“A what?” I exclaimed. - -“A smirkler. He smirkles for mivlets you know,” was the reply. - -“Good gracious. What are they?” cried the Wallypug. - -“Mivlets?” asked Ho-Lor. - -[Illustration: “HE IS A BEAUTIFUL CREATURE,” SAID HIS MAJESTY.] - -His Majesty nodded. - -“Why young mivs, of course.” - -“But what are mivs?” asked his Majesty curiously. - -“Things that are smirkled for,” replied Ho-Lor promptly. “But come. I -see that Gra-Shus has prepared some tea for us.” - -We entered the little blue temple and were each presented with a little -blue rug, upon which we sat cross-legged, as we observed that Mi-Hy and -Ho-Lor were doing. Gra-Shus served us in blue cups what tasted like -delicious tea, but which looked exactly like blue ink. No sooner had we -taken a few sips than I noticed that the Wallypug was slowly turning a -light blue color, while at the same moment he stared at me fixedly a -moment, and then exclaimed: “Why, what a funny color you are!” - -I looked at my hands, and found them a rich blue shade. - -“We look like the Oxford and Cambridge boat race, don’t we?” he -continued: “I’m so glad that I’m Cambridge!” - -I did not at all approve of the change, for although we did not look so -very remarkable in the midst of our strange surroundings, I could not -help thinking what an extraordinary object I should be considered in -London if I ever reached that place again. - -“Oh! Aren’t they pretty now?” exclaimed Gra-Shus, clapping her hands -and dancing about excitedly. - -“I am glad you think so,” I replied, in a huff. - -“Don’t you like it? Would you rather have been green? We’ve plenty of -green tea, you know, if you wish.” - -“Thanks! I should prefer being my original color, if you don’t mind,” I -replied. - -“Dear me! I’m very sorry, but I’m afraid we’re out of that color. Let’s -see! Crushed strawberry, wasn’t it?” - -“Oh! let’s stay blue for a little while,” pleaded his Majesty. “It’s -such a change, and so very uncommon, you know!” - -So blue we remained, and directly after we had finished our tea Mi-Hy -brought around the little blue boat again, and we went for a row on the -ornamental lake. - -Somehow or another Kis-Smee was left behind, and although the Wallypug -suggested putting back for him, it was finally decided, however, not to -do so. - -[Illustration: WE WENT FOR A ROW ON THE ORNAMENTAL LAKE.] - -“Perhaps he will smirkle a mivlet while we are away,” said Ho-Lor. - -And I confidently hoped that he might do so, for I was as curious as -was the Wallypug to know what the term meant. - -Just then we passed a curious little blue island with one tiny house on -it, standing in the midst of some curious trees and strangely-shaped -rocks. “Let’s go ashore and fish,” suddenly suggested Mi-Hy. - -“Oh! yes, do,” cried the Wallypug. “I love fishing; but I’m never -allowed to do so in my own land.” - -“Why not?” inquired Ho-Lor. - -“The fishes object,” replied his Majesty, sadly; “they say that it -gives them the tooth-ache.” - -“How absurd of them,” said Ho-Lor, sympathetically. - -“Yes; isn’t it perfectly ridiculous?” replied his Majesty; “for they -really haven’t any teeth, you know.” - -By this time the boat had reached the shore, and we all scrambled out -and assisted Ho-Lor up the steep rocks. - -From within the little blue house Mi-Hy brought some rods and lines, -and we began to fish. There was no bait of any kind, but this Ho-Lor -explained was not necessary. - -Under the circumstances I was not surprised to find that we did not get -a bite for a considerable time. - -At last, however, the Wallypug announced with a delighted shout, “I’ve -got one!” and we all ran over to see what it was. - -Slowly his Majesty wound up his line, while Mi-Hy hung over the rocks -with a landing net. “I’ve got it!” he shouted. “Oh, what a beauty!” and -diving his hand into the net, he drew out—what do you think? An empty -ink-bottle! - -I couldn’t help laughing at his Majesty’s disappointed face, but Ho-Lor -seemed positively to think that it was a catch worth having. “It’s in -capital condition,” he exclaimed, examining it critically, “and has a -beautifully-shaped neck.” - -“But it’s only an old ink bottle,” objected the poor Wallypug. - -“What else did you expect to catch, I should like to know?” said Mi-Hy. -“Some people are never satisfied. Many a time I have fished here a -whole day and only caught a piece of blotting paper or a pen-wiper.” - -“What funny things to catch!” exclaimed the Wallypug. - -“They are very appropriate things to get from a lake of ink,” said -Ho-Lor rather huffily. - -“Oh! I’m sure I beg your pardon, I had no idea it was real ink,” said -his Majesty, apologetically. “I don’t think we had better fish any -longer,” he said putting away his rod. “I hoped to have caught some -real fish, you know.” - -“Never heard of them. What are they?” asked Ho-Lor. - -“Why, things with scales, you know,” exclaimed the Wallypug. - -“Oh, you mean weighing machines,” said Mi-Hy. - -“No! no! I mean—” - -“Hark! what’s that?” said Ho-Lor, putting his hand to his ear. - -“Come on! That’s Kis-Smee barking. I expect he has smirkled a mivlet. -Come along, hurry up, or we shall be too late.” - -We hurriedly launched the little boat, and were soon on our way across -the little lake. - -The sound of furious barking, mingled with a strangely familiar voice, -came from behind Ho-Lor’s house, and hurrying forward we came suddenly -upon a remarkable sight. - -Kis-Smee was prancing madly round a gombobble tree to the lower -branches of which A. Fish, Esq., was clinging in an agony of fright. - -[Illustration: Kis-Smee was prancing madly round a gombobble tree to -the lower branches of which A. Fish, Esq., was clinging in an agony of -fright.—Page 128. - _Wallypugland._] - -“Lie dowd, sir! Lie dowd, good dog, thed!” he shouted, while Kis-Smee -barked and made sudden furious little darts at the fish’s tail. - -“Why, it’s A. Fish, Esq.,” cried his Majesty, hurrying forward -anxiously. “Come away, Kis-Smee! Lie down, sir!” - -Kis-Smee left his quarry in the tree, and came bounding up to the -Wallypug, wagging his great clumsy tail delightedly. - -“Good gracious!” exclaimed Mi-Hy, staring in amazement at A. Fish, Esq. -“That’s not a mivlet, I’m sure—what on earth is the creature?” - -“Oh, that’s A. Fish, Esq., a great friend of mine,” hastily explained -his Majesty, running to his assistance, for when Kis-Smee had left him, -poor A. Fish, Esq., had dropped off the gombobble tree, and was now -lying exhausted on the blue grass beneath. - -“What a dreadful bodster!” he cried, waving Kis-Smee off as we -approached. “Keep hib off. Take hib away!” - -“It’s all right,” said his Majesty, reassuringly, “he won’t bite you -now that we are here.” - -Indeed, directly the dog discovered that A. Fish, Esq., was a friend of -the Wallypug’s, he went up to him, and grinning in an absurd way, held -out a paw to be shaken, which favor, however, was declined by A. Fish, -Esq., who evidently regarded these overtures with a certain amount of -suspicion, and looked greatly relieved when Ho-Lor and Mi-Hy, seeing -that we were engaged with a friend, considerately left us to ourselves, -and took Kis-Smee away with them. - - - - -CHAPTER XI. - -THE WHY AND WER-HAR-WEI RAILWAY. - - -“FANCY seeing you!” cried his Majesty, as we sat down beside the Fish -under the gombobble tree. “How ever did you get here? And what’s the -news at Why?” - -“Oh, thad’s a log story,” said A. Fish, Esq., and proceeded to tell us -how that after we had escaped from Why, by means of the shute, there -had been a great commotion in the place, and the Doctor-in-Law was -furious. He declared that we should not slip through his hands in this -way, and had a long conversation with the Sister-in-Law and the others -as to the best way of affecting our capture. Finally they decided to -attach themselves to a long rope, and come down the shute in pursuit -of us. - -A. Fish, Esq., made the excuse that his cold was too bad to permit him -to join the party, and waited till they had got a good way down, and -then cut the rope. He thought that this would be the best way of being -of service to us. And so it was, of course, for goodness only knows -where our pursuers were by this time. - -A little while after he had cut the rope A. Fish, Esq., came across the -Crow, who told him that he had been informed by two duffer birds (which -was the name of the curious blue birds which we had noticed) that we -were here at Wer-har-wei, and had immediately set about to discover the -best way to get here. - -He went in the first place to the station-master at Why, and found him, -as usual, engaged in squabbling with the porter. - -They were arguing as to whether a certain signal should be up or down. - -The station-master declared that the signal should always be up on the -up line and down on the down line. This the porter would not agree to, -so it was at last decided to put one up and one down and leave them so, -and then the engine-drivers could do as they pleased about going on or -stopping. - -[Illustration: AS USUAL THE STATION-MASTER WAS SQUABBLING WITH THE -PORTER.] - -When they had quite settled this dispute, A. Fish, Esq., had asked them -if there were any trains running between Why and this place, and at -first they had said no; but presently the porter remembered that there -was a certain train which started on some days and went no one knew -where. - -No one was ever known to travel by it, and the engine-driver, who was -an old salamander by the name of Mike, was deaf and dumb, and could -neither read nor write, so that they had never been able to find out -from him where his train went to. It had some letters on it which -corresponded with those on the station-master’s collar, but no one -had ever been able to discover what they meant. They were popularly -supposed to stand for Weary Waiting and Horribly Wobbly Railway, the -initials on the station-master’s collar being W.W.H.W.R., but A. -Fish, Esq., had by a brilliant inspiration come to the conclusion -that they stood for Why and Wer-har-wei Railway, and when the train, -which consisted of only one carriage and the engine, came into the -station, he jumped in, to the intense surprise of Mike, who had never -had a passenger before, and who in his agitation recklessly put two -shovelfuls of coal into the furnace, and, giving a frantic “toot” on -the whistle, started off at full speed. - -“It was a dreadful journey,” said A. Fish, Esq., “ad I dever had so -bedy ups and dowds id all by life.” - -We didn’t quite understand what he meant by this at the moment, but a -little later on we discovered the reason to our cost. - -After an eventful journey, A. Fish, Esq., had arrived at this place, -and had found on alighting from the train that no one was to be seen, -and he was just about to kick at the door of Ho-Lor’s house when -Kis-Smee came bounding out. Poor A. Fish, Esq., had been terribly -alarmed, and had made for the nearest tree, and was vainly trying to -climb up into it when we made our appearance. - -“If I were you,” he advised, “I should certaidly cub back to Why at -odce, for the people all seeb to be rejoiced thad Madame and the -Doctor-id-Law have gode away, ad I think thad they would willingly -forgive you for having said, ‘Ad horse! ad horse! by kigdob for ad -horse!’” - -After talking the matter over for a few minutes we decided that perhaps -it would be the best thing to do, and as the little blue station was -only just at the back of Ho-Lor’s house we thought that perhaps by -hurrying we should catch the same train back to Why by which A. Fish, -Esq., had come. So we set out to try and find the little blue people, -to bid them “good-by,” and thank them for their hospitality. - -We found them at the station sitting beside Mike, to whom it appeared -they were in the habit of being very kind on his occasional visits. - -They seemed quite sorry to hear that we were leaving them so soon, -and insisted upon making the Wallypug a present of Kis-Smee, and of -stuffing into my pocket an enormous gombobble as a souvenir of my -visit. Then there was just time to look at the “train” before we -started. I must say that of all crazy, ramshackle affairs it was quite -the worst that I had ever seen. To begin with, the wheels were all -sorts of shapes, and not one of them was quite round. There was only -one compartment, and that had no windows in it. And the engine! Well, -it was something like Puffing Billy, only a little worse. - -There was no room for Kis-Smee in the carriage, so we were obliged to -chain him up on the roof, evidently much to his disgust. - -I must confess to a certain feeling of uneasiness when, having taken -our seats, the engine gave a snort, and puffing out a volume of dense -black smoke and smuts, started us on our journey. - -By reason of the odd shape of our wheels and the unevenness of the -rails the carriage pitched and tossed about like a ship at sea, and our -passage over a little wooden viaduct, where on either side the little -blue people stood waving their adieux with quaint little flags, was, I -am convinced, attended with considerable danger. - -It was really a dreadful journey. The carriage pitched backward and -forward, and rolled from side to side with every revolution of the -wheels, while poor Kis-Smee, on the top, kept slipping about in the -most painful manner. His Majesty’s carpet-bag, which had not been -securely fastened to the top of the carriage, slipped off soon after we -started, and though we rang the bell violently Mike refused to stop, -and it was lost forever. - -“Fortunately there was not much in it!” his Majesty gasped between -the jerks which the irregular motion of the train occasioned. “Only a -tooth-brush and small cake of soap.” - -[Illustration: The carriage pitched backward and rolled from side to -side.—Page 138. - _Wallypugland._] - -“But it felt quite full,” I remarked in surprise. - -“Yes,” explained his Majesty. “I stuffed it full of paper and things, -because I thought that it would look so bad for a king to be traveling -about without any luggage.” - -Just then there was a yelp and a howl from Kis-Smee, and looking out -of the window we found that the poor creature had fallen from the roof -and was hanging down by the chain which was attached to the top of the -carriage, and was in momentary danger of being strangled. - -We managed, after a prolonged struggle, to haul him in through the -window, and, although we were rather crowded, to find room for him in -the carriage. We had hardly settled down into our places, however, -before the train came to a standstill, and Mike came to the door in a -great state of agitation. - -“Av yez plaze, sor,” he began. - -“Why! I thought you were deaf and dumb,” I cried. - -“Och—that’s all gammon sure—oi can talk all roight, and hear all -roight too when it suits me purpose. Well, now, ye see when the dog -fell off the roof he upset me coal-scuttle, and never a bit of coal is -there left. Would ye be good enough, kind gentlemen, to go back and -pick some up off the line, it’s only about a moile and a half back.” - -The engine, it appeared, could not be reversed, and, as there was no -chance of getting a supply anywhere else, nothing remained but for his -Majesty and myself to go back with the coal-scuttle and pick some of -the spilt coal up. - -Kis-Smee bounded delightedly at our side; but we did not take A. Fish, -Esq., with us, as he complained of a pain in his tail, and we feared -that the long walk might make it worse. - -“I shall amuse byself while you are away by giving Bike ad elocutiod -lessod,” he said, as we left him. - -But Mike, who was undoing his bundle preparatory to having some dinner, -did not look very enthusiastic over the project, and I am almost -certain I heard him mutter, “Not if I know it,” as we were walking away. - -We found the coal, as we expected, beside the line, after we had walked -a little over a mile, and his Majesty and myself picked it up, and -packing it in the scuttle, took turns in carrying it back to the train -again. - -We had nearly arrived at the spot where the train was waiting for us, -when his Majesty noticed some curious flowers growing in a little copse -beside the line, and we put down our coal-scuttle and went to gather -them. While we were doing so, however, we heard a wild shout, and -looking up beheld an enormously tall and thin man running towards us, -gesticulating violently. - -He was waving some wire and leather dog muzzles in one hand. - -[Illustration: THE TALL THIN MAN WAS WAVING SOME MUZZLES.] - -“Where’s his muzzle?” he demanded, pointing to Kis-Smee. “Can’t you see -the dog is mad and must be muzzled immediately?” - -“I’m sure he’s not,” cried the Wallypug, indignantly, and patting -Kis-Smee’s head. - -“He is,” declared the man. “All dogs are mad, and I insist upon them -being muzzled.” - -“Very well,” I interposed. “You had better try and put a muzzle on this -one yourself.” - -“Oh! I’ll soon do that,” cried the man, selecting a large muzzle from -the collection which he carried with him. “Come here, sir! Good dog, -then.” - -Kis-Smee growled, and grinning more than ever made a dart at the man, -who dropped his muzzles and fled, screaming, “Mad dog! Mad dog!” at the -top of his voice. - -His Majesty and myself, laughing heartily at his discomfiture, hurried -back to the train without meeting with any further adventures. - -A. Fish, Esq., and Mike seemed to be rather cool towards each other, I -thought, and I heard afterwards that they had not got on at all well -with the “elocution” lesson—in fact, Mike had absolutely refused to be -instructed in that very necessary art. - -Of course we told them of our adventure with the man in the wood, and -Mike explained that he was well known as “The Long Man of Muzzledom,” -and was quite harmless, though rather silly, being under the impression -that all dogs and cats were mad and should be muzzled. - -“Well, he didn’t muzzle Kis-Smee, anyhow,” said his Majesty, as we took -our seats in the carriage, and the train once more started for Why. - -After several hours of bumping and jolting, we were delighted to see -the familiar towers and gables of his Majesty’s palace in the distance, -and knew that we had at last arrived at the end of our journey. - - - - -CHAPTER XII. - -BACK AGAIN AT WHY. - - -KIS-SMEE was overjoyed to get out of the train, and eagerly strained at -the chain which his Majesty had affixed to his collar, in his endeavor -to get through the barrier. - -The porter, however, who pretended not to know us, demanded our tickets. - -“It’s all right,” said his Majesty, smilingly. “I’m the Wallypug, you -know.” - -“Nonsense,” said the porter. “The Wallypug was ugly enough, goodness -knows, but he hadn’t a _blue_ face like you; besides, Wallypug or no -Wallypug, you don’t get through here without a ticket, I can tell you.” - -Here was a pretty pickle. We had not thought in the least about -tickets, and in fact had no idea that any would be required. - -“I certainly shan’t let you pass the barrier without,” said the porter, -in answer to our explanations. - -“But what are we to do?” asked the Wallypug. “Can’t we pay at this end?” - -“Certainly not. My instructions are to demand a ticket of every one -passing this barrier, and unless you give me one you cannot go through.” - -“But I tell you we haven’t any. Can’t you tell us what to do?” - -“Go back for them, I should say,” said the porter, yawning -unconcernedly. “Now then, one thing or another. Are you going to give -me the tickets or not?” - -“How can we give them to you if we haven’t any?” demanded the Wallypug. -The porter slammed the door to impatiently, and went a little way up -the platform, turning around to call out warningly, “If we find any -suspicious-looking characters hanging about the station premises we -shoot them.” - -[Illustration: THE PORTER DEMANDED OUR TICKETS.] - -“What nonsense!” cried the Wallypug, rattling and kicking the gate. -“We can’t stop here all day. Let’s call the station-master. Hi! hi! -station-master!” he shouted. - -No one answered for a few minutes, but eventually a door some little -distance up the platform opened, and the old station-master made his -appearance, puffing and blowing, and followed by the porter, carrying a -huge blunderbuss. - -“Now then, what’s all this noise about?” he demanded. - -“We want to get out, if you please,” said the Wallypug. - -“Where are your tickets,” demanded the station-master. - -“We are very sorry,” I began in explanation. - -“Hold your tongue, and speak when you are spoken to,” interrupted the -station-master. - -“Where are your tickets?” - -“They haven’t any,” explained the porter officiously. “They are trying -to defraud the company.” - -“H’m, funny-looking lot of people, too,” remarked the station-master. -“Who are they, do you know?” - -“That,” said the porter, pointing to his Majesty, “says he is the -Wallypug.” - -“What! _that_ color!” objected the station-master. “The Wallypug! -Indeed, what nonsense!” - -“But, indeed, I am the Wallypug,” declared his Majesty, “and we turned -this color after we drank the tea, you know.” - -“Turned blue through drinking tea!” said the station-master -incredulously. - -“Ha! ha! a _likely_ story,” laughed the porter derisively. - -“Perhaps it will wear off in time,” said the Wallypug, “like being -sunburnt does.” - -“Very well then, you had better stop here till it does,” said the -station-master. “Look here!” he cried, turning to the porter, “you stop -here at the barrier, and don’t let them through until they have turned -a respectable color, and you can recognize them.” - -“But it may take weeks,” began his Majesty. - -“Hold your tongue!” said the station-master sharply. “If you have any -nonsense with them, shoot them,” he added to the porter, depositing the -blunderbuss beside the barrier, and going back to the other end of the -platform. - -Whatever we should have done I cannot think, if just at that moment the -porter’s wife had not put her head out of the signal-box and called to -him to “come in at once and mind the baby,” while she “did a little -shopping.” - -“But he’s on duty, ma’am,” expostulated the station-master. - -“I don’t care anything about _that;_ you come in at once, Bill,” -shouted the woman, and the porter meekly left the barrier and -disappeared within the signal-box. - -Of course we all rushed through the gate at once, and the -station-master catching sight of Kis-Smee, who had meanwhile slipped -his chain, fled up the platform in dismay. - -Kis-Smee, evidently thinking him fair game, started off in pursuit, -and it was not till the station-master had bolted into his office and -locked the door that we could get him to come back to our call. - -[Illustration: FLED UP THE PLATFORM IN DISMAY.] - -So soon as we got into the street we met the Turtle and the Pelican, -walking arm-in-arm, and each smoking a cigarette. - -“Hullo, Wallypug!” exclaimed the Pelican. “Why, we thought you were at -Wei-hai-wei.” - -“Wer-har-wei, you mean,” laughed his Majesty. - -“It’s all the same,” announced the Pelican. “Well, how have you been -getting on?” - -His Majesty explained as briefly as possible the adventures we had -passed through, and then inquired how affairs were progressing at Why. - -“Oh, not very well, I’m afraid,” said the Pelican. “You see, there -has been no one to take the lead since you’ve been away. We tried a -Republican form of government, and elected Oom-Hi as president, but he -became so extravagant—wanted a new top-hat every day, and insisted on -a gilded coach to ride in; and at last we caught him tampering with the -public funds, so we had to dismiss him. Have you heard about Broncho?” - -“No,” said his Majesty. - -“Well, it didn’t answer as a cough mixture, so Oom-Hi turned it into a -patent meat extract, and called it Vimbril, and it killed ever so many -people.” - -“Indeed!” exclaimed the Wallypug, anxiously. “Any one I know?” - -“Madame and a few other folk,” was the reply; “and the Doctor-in-Law is -not expected to recover.” - -“Good gracious! Why, we thought them at the other end of the world. -However did they get back to Why again?” - -“Oh, they sent us a cablegram when they got to China, and we let down -an enormously long rope and pulled them up the shute again, you know. -But it was a very long journey, and they had nothing to eat on the -way. So as soon as we hauled them up we gave them each a large dose of -Vimbril. Madame expired at once,” he added, with a sob. - -The tears were streaming down the Turtle’s nose as he sympathetically -joined in the Pelican’s weeping. - -“What about the Doctor-in-Law?” inquired his Majesty, solicitously. - -“Oh, he has a very strong constitution, you know, and he may pull -through. We’ve got him back at the palace in his old quarters.” - -“Poor fellow! Poor fellow!” said the Wallypug, sympathetically. “Let’s -go and see what we can do for him.” - -I thought this very kind of his Majesty, considering all he had -suffered through the Doctor-in-Law’s ingratitude; but the good-hearted -little fellow was full of sympathy, and hurried towards the palace with -all speed. - - - - -CHAPTER XIII. - -A NEW STATE OF AFFAIRS. - - -“OH my! Good gracious me!” exclaimed a voice as we approached the -entrance to the palace and looking up we beheld the Cockatoo perched -on a window-sill. “Just look at these creatures. _What_ a color. Why, -why,” she exclaimed, peering at us closely, “I’m bothered if it isn’t -the Wallypug and the Hatless Man, and the great Mr. A. Fish, Esq. Where -have you been? What did you come back for? What do you want?” she -screamed. - -“It’s dud of your busidess,” replied A. Fish, Esq., shortly. - -“Oh! isn’t it,” said the Cockatoo furiously. “I’ll soon show you -whether it’s none of my business or not. To begin with, the Wallypug -and the headless traitor”— - -“Do you mean me?” I interrupted, “because I am not headless yet, you -know.” - -[Illustration: “WHAT A COLOR!” EXCLAIMED THE COCKATOO.] - -“Headless, or hatless, it’s all the same,” said the Cockatoo, “you -might as well run about without your head for all the good it is to -you,” she added insolently. “Well you two are escaped prisoners,” she -ran on, “and I shall see that you are locked up again, so there.” - -“But it was all a mistake,” said His Majesty mildly. - -“What was?” yelled the bird. - -“What I said about a ’horse a horse, my kingdom for a horse!’ you -know,” said the Wallypug. - -“Why don’t you say what you mean then?” cried the Cockatoo. “Well, I -shall have you locked up anyhow. Here, Crocodile,” she shouted, “just -come and arrest these creatures will you?” - -“Shan’t!” replied a voice from within; “who are you ordering about. If -you want them arrested, do it yourself. I’m not going to do as _you_ -tell me, so there! besides, all the prisoners have been set free that -Madame sentenced, you know that well enough?” - -“Yah! Down with him, down with Crocodiles; down with pale-blue -Wallypugs and hatless men; down with fishes of all sorts. Down with -everybody and everything; down with——.” - -We did not stop to hear any more of her ravings, but passed through and -up into the Doctor-in-Law’s old rooms. - -We found him looking very weak and ill, but he recognized us all, and -held out his hand to the Wallypug, who told him encouragingly that he -would soon be well again. - -“Yes, ad thed I’ll teach you elocutiod for dothig,” promised A. Fish, -Esq. - -The Doctor-in-Law smiled faintly, and whispered that what was keeping -him back most was the thought of the heavy doctor’s bill which he would -have to pay when he got better. - -The good-natured little Wallypug made him very happy by promising to -pay this amount for him, and we left the little man looking very much -brighter than when we entered. - -[Illustration: We found the Doctor-in-Law looking very weak and ill, -but he recognized us all and held out his hand to the Wallypug.—Page -158. - _Wallypugland._] - -The rest of the morning was spent in his Majesty’s private apartments, -discussing all sorts of plans for the future, for, as the Wallypug very -properly remarked, now that the Mother-in-Law had gone he should have a -freer hand in the administration of affairs. - -A. Fish, Esq., busied himself in preparing an elaborate lecture, -which he said he would deliver in public on the morrow, on the -“Unreasonableness of Misunderstandability,” and which would, he hoped, -clearly explain away the mistake which had been made, in accusing his -Majesty of treason, in connection with his unfortunate recitation of “A -horse, a horse, my kingdom for a horse!” - -While we were thus busily engaged there came an impatient -tap-tap-tapping at the door, and on opening it we beheld the Crow -looking more disreputably untidy than ever. He carried a large bundle -of papers and a quill pen. “Ahem!” he began importantly, “I call on -behalf of the _Daily Whyer_ a new paper which I have just established, -and which I am happy to say has already an enormous circulation in Why. -It is very cheap (four copies for a penny), and contains an enormous -amount of totally unreliable information; besides which there is a page -devoted to domestic matters, highly interesting to ladies, and includes -receipts for artistically furnishing your house with old tea chests -and soap boxes, painted with enamel and draped with art muslin; there -are also several poems weekly on the subject of ‘Baby’s Little Socks,’ -which are immensely popular with some people, here is one of them,” he -cried, turning to the back page of his paper, a copy of which he had -with him. - - “Oh! the baby’s little socks, - Darling baby’s little socks; - When the kettle’s softly steaming, - When the firelight’s glow is gleaming, - And I’m sitting idly dreaming, - Whisper gently, ‘baby’s socks.’ - - “Oh the darling little socks; - Baby’s _baby’s_ little socks; - Toys that baby fingers scatter, - Little feet that pitter-patter, - Tittle tongues—but there—no matter, - Let’s get back to baby’s socks.” - -“There,” he concluded triumphantly, “what do you think of that?” - -“Well, I don’t wish to be rude,” I remarked, “but I certainly think -it’s the greatest rubbish I’ve ever heard in all my life.” - -“Rubbish!” he exclaimed, “Why all the ladies who read the _Daily Whyer_ -think it _beautiful_. I have to get the same gentleman to write verses -like that nearly every day.” - -“Do you mean to tell me,” I replied, “that a man writes such twaddle as -that.” - -“Oh! you’re jealous, that’s what’s the matter with you. A man write -them? of course he does.” - -“And do you pay him for these precious contributions,” I exclaimed in -surprise. - -“I _promise_ to pay him ever so much a year,” said the Crow, -“but—er—ahem—I have a very bad memory. I have several contributors -whom I pay on the same system, it’s a very _cheap_ way,” he sniffled. -“I’ve copied it from a contemporary.” - -“Well, we’re very busy just dow,” said A. Fish, Esq., “would you bind -telling us your busidess ad goig, because we wandt to ged to work -agaid.” - -“Oh! to tell you the truth,” said the Crow, “I wanted to know if the -Wallypug would let me print an interview with him in to-morrow’s paper. -You have just returned from Wer-har-wei, I believe, haven’t you; I was -sitting on the signal post at the station just now and saw you arrive. -I think my readers would be very interested in hearing your impressions -of the country.” - -I took his Majesty aside and pointed out to him that very possibly an -interview with him appearing in the paper would have a good effect on -his people, and he could use it as a means of advertising the reforms -he intended making in the government of the land; and his Majesty -agreeing with me on the point, he seated himself comfortably in his own -particular chair, and the Crow, perching on the back of another, the -interview began. - -“Let’s see,” said the Crow, making a great spluttering with his pen, -which was cross-nibbed and broken. “When were you born?” - -“Well, really,” said his Majesty, “I, er—was so young at the time that -I scarcely remember.” - -“Oh, well, I’ll put it down as Y. D. 987; that will do as well as any -other date.” - -“Why Y. D.?” I inquired, curiously. - -“Year of disgrace,” was the prompt reply. “Bless me! this must be a -Post Office pen,” he went on, as the pen scattered the ink about in all -directions. “They are always bad, you know.” Then, having asked the -Wallypug no end of questions, not only about our journey, but on all -sorts of private matters also, the wretched-looking bird gathered up -his papers, which were covered with unintelligible blots and scratches -and scattered in all parts of the room, and, tucking them under his -wing, departed, to have the matter set up in print. - -[Illustration: “THIS MUST BE A POST OFFICE PEN,” SAID THE CROW.] - - - - -CHAPTER XIV. - -“GOOD FOR THE COMPLEXION.” - - -THE Crow had scarcely left the room when there was another knock, and -without waiting for a reply the Cockatoo burst into the room in a fine -fluster. She was followed by the Kangaroo and Oom Hi. - -“Look at them! _Look at them!_” she blurted out, “did you ever see such -objects in all your life. What a color!” - -“Hm! Eggshell blue,” said the Kangaroo, examining the Wallypug -critically. “Very extraordinary tint. Never seen a face that shade -before.” - -“The other one is worse,” declared the Cockatoo, pointing at me -derisively. “I always knew he was something disreputable. I believe,” -she added, sinking her voice into a hoarse whisper, “I believe he has -let himself out as an advertisement for Stephen’s Blue-black Ink, or -Ricket’s Paris Blue. What depravity. Down with him! Duck him in the -pond! Scrub him with sandpaper! Boil him!” and so she went on. - -“What’s all this bother about?” I exclaimed. “Don’t you see that his -Majesty is engaged. If you don’t immediately go about your business I -will have you put out of the room.” - -“Oh! will you indeed,” exclaimed the Cockatoo excitedly, “I should like -to see you attempt it. It strikes me that _you_ are the one that will -be put out. We can stand a good deal down here, but a hatless object -with a _blue_ face. Ough!” - -“Here, come and do your duty,” she shouted, going to the door, and the -two Crocodiles entered and caught hold of me roughly by the collar. -“Bring them out into the courtyard,” shouted the infuriated bird, and -before I could protest I was bundled unceremoniously out of the house -by the Crocodiles, the Kangaroo and Oom Hi following with the Wallypug. - -[Illustration: “Ough! ough!” spluttered his Majesty. “You’re putting it -all in my eyes. Oh, ach! do-o-n’t! Stop! I say, _do_ leave off.”—Page -167. - _Wallypugland._] - -“Now then,” said the Cockatoo, stopping before a large tub of water -which stood on the ground, “see what soap and water will do.” - -The Kangaroo rummaged about and discovered a small hard piece of yellow -soap, and Oom Hi brought forth a good sized sponge, and together they -gave the poor little Wallypug such a scrubbing as I should think he had -never had before in all his life. - -“Ough! ough!” spluttered his Majesty. “You’re putting it all in my -eyes. Oh, ach! do-o-on’t! Stop! I say, _do_ leave off. Ough!” - -The poor little fellow was nearly choked. - -Oom Hi sponged the soap away and the Cockatoo stared critically at the -poor Wallypug, who stood there with the water streaming from his face -and the tips of his fingers. - -“Hasn’t done the slightest good,” she declared; “better scrape him with -a putty knife, I think.” - -“Stop a minute!” said the Kangaroo, “I have it,” and he went up and -whispered something in Oom Hi’s ear. - -“Capital! capital! go and fetch a bottle,” cried Oom Hi, and the -Kangaroo rushed off, returning a minute later with a large bottle -marked Vimbril. - -“Oh! don’t! don’t!” cried the poor Wallypug. “I’m not going to take any -of that stuff. It killed the lady who called herself my Sister-in-Law -you know, and it made the Doctor-in-Law ill. Take it away.” - -“Of course you are not going to take any, Wallypug,” said Oom Hi -soothingly, “but there will be no harm in trying the effect upon your -complexion. It _might_ make you the proper color again you know, and -in that case I could alter the name and call it ‘Wallypug’s Blush,’ and -advertise it well; no doubt it would be a great success. Put some on -the sponge,” he continued, holding it out to the Kangaroo, who poured -out some of the nasty looking stuff. - -“No! no! don’t. Ough!” shuddered his Majesty, but despite his protests -his face was well rubbed with the fluid. - -“Worse than ever, he’s light brown now,” said the Cockatoo. - -“Oh! wipe it off! wipe it off,” implored the Wallypug. - -“No!” said Oom Hi, who seemed very greatly disappointed at the -non-success of his experiment, “let it dry on.” - -“We had better put him in the stocks,” he declared, “to prevent him -from rubbing it off.” So the poor little Wallypug was led off to the -stocks and securely fastened in, with his hands spread out to dry, and -with strict injunctions not to move till he was told. - -[Illustration: HIS MAJESTY IN THE STOCKS.] - -The last view that I had of his Majesty was of the poor little fellow, -utterly worn out with his exertions, meekly sitting in the stocks and -falling into an uneasy slumber, from which, however, he was frequently -awakened by the bees and flies, which, attracted by the sticky stuff on -his face and hands, flocked around him as though he were a pot of jam. - -“We might keep _this_ as a curiosity,” said the Cockatoo, turning her -attention to me next. “Put in a cage with a large label, ‘Blue-faced -and hatless man, Dangerous!’ he ought to be an attraction to our -menagerie. I think that’s what we’ll do with him,” and despite -my struggles and protests I was ignominiously marched off by the -Crocodiles, who continued to make rude and personal remarks about my -appearance all the way to the dungeon, where it appeared I was to spend -my time till a cage could be prepared for me. - -Of course I was terribly indignant at my treatment, but was absolutely -powerless to prevent it And the only thing that I could do when the -Crocodiles had left me alone, after a few parting jeers, was to -consider the best way of effecting my escape. - -[Illustration: MADE RUDE AND PERSONAL REMARKS ABOUT MY APPEARANCE.] - -I was pondering seriously upon this question, when suddenly I -remembered the Gombobble with which the little blue people had -presented me when I left Wer-har-wei. Taking it from my pocket I idly -wondered if it were good to eat or not. It felt soft and looked -something like a huge blue orange or a melon; getting out my penknife -I plunged it in and cut the fruit open. Inside was a white juicy pulp -which looked very tempting, so trusting to its being good to eat I took -a bite. - -It was delicious! - -I took another bite, and then, happening to look at my hands, I -discovered to my great delight that they were regaining their proper -color. - -“Come, this is better,” I cried, tackling a third piece; and then -suddenly remembering the poor Wallypug, I carefully cut the Gombobble -in half and put part of it aside for his Majesty, and was just about to -eat another little piece myself, when, happening to look up, I caught -sight of Mr. Nobody from Nowhere, squeezing through the bars of my -dungeon window. - -He was as smiling and happy as ever, and made me an elaborate bow with -an elegant flourish, and then looked so very knowing that I felt sure -that he had something important to communicate. - - - - -CHAPTER XV. - -“WALLYPUG’S BLUSH LIMITED.” - - -“HOW do you do?” I began. - -The little fellow bowed and smiled and brought forth a scrap of paper -and a pencil. - -On the paper he wrote, “Quite well thanks, how are you?” and added the -words, “Can I be of any service to you?” - -I pondered a moment, and then recollected that he would be a capital -medium of communication between the Wallypug and myself. - -“Do you know where the stocks are?” I inquired. - -Mr. Nobody nodded vigorously. - -“His Majesty the Wallypug is there,” I ventured. - -Mr. Nobody nodded again very energetically, and I could see that he -knew all about it. Moreover he wrote on his paper, “Poor Wallypug!” and -looked most sympathetic. - -“Would you like to help him?” I inquired. - -The little man nodded again, and seemed quite delighted at the prospect. - -Handing him the half of the Gombobble which I had reserved for his -Majesty, I said, “Take this to the Wallypug immediately and, _if he is -quite alone_, tell him to eat it all, and on no account to tell any one -how he became possessed of it.” - -Mr. Nobody nodded to show that he understood, and, taking the piece -of Gombobble, he squeezed through the bars of my cell, and was soon -running off in the direction of the stocks. - -I awaited his return with some anxiety, and was delighted to see when -he did come back, that his face was beaming with delight. - -[Illustration: MR. NOBODY NODDED.] - -“His Majesty has regained his complexion, and is very grateful to you,” -he wrote hurriedly, clapping his hands and capering about. - -“Now go and tell Oom Hi and the Kangaroo, and if they come to the -conclusion that his Majesty’s complexion has been restored through -using the stuff they call ‘Wallypug’s Blush,’ don’t say anything to the -contrary; it will put them into a good temper and perhaps make them -kinder to his Majesty.” - -Mr. Nobody seemed quite to understand and hurried off again. He did not -come back, but about half an hour afterwards there was a noise at the -door of my cell, and after a great deal of fumbling at the lock, Oom Hi -and the Kangaroo entered. - -Oom Hi carried a basin and the Kangaroo a bottle of Vimbril, or -Wallypug’s Blush, as it was now called. - -They looked very amiable, and after some kind remarks about the weather -Oom Hi cleared his throat and said in a sort of apologetic voice: - -[Illustration: OOM HI CARRIED A BASIN, AND THE KANGAROO A BOTTLE OF -VIMBRIL.] - -“Er, we didn’t mean to be _too_ severe, you know, and what we have -done has been all for the best. You will be pleased to hear that my -invaluable preparation, ‘Wallypug’s Blush,’ has proved perfectly -satisfactory, and his Majesty the Wallypug is a living testimony to -its worth. His beautiful complexion has entirely returned, and I have -no doubt if we could persuade you to use it too it would be equally -successful in your case. You will try it, won’t you?” he pleaded -earnestly. - -“Of course if my complexion, such as it is, is restored, I shall be -released from here?” I hazarded. - -“Oh! certainly,” said both animals at once, and so after -surreptitiously devouring the remainder of the Gombobble, I permitted -the creatures to smear my face over with their precious rubbish on the -distinct understanding that I should be allowed to have a good wash -afterwards. - -The Gombobble acted perfectly, and the animals were delighted when they -saw the result, as they of course put it down to the effect of their -“Wallypug’s Blush.” - -“Go and fetch the Cockatoo,” said Oom Hi, “she shall judge for -herself.” - -So the Kangaroo went off to fetch her. - -“Wonderful preparation, isn’t it?” said Oom Hi, gazing affectionately -at his bottle of “Wallypug’s Blush.” - -“Very!” I remarked. - -“I _knew_ it must be good for something or another,” he went on, “but -of course we could not tell exactly what till we had tried. It _very -nearly_ cured a cold once, you know, when I called it Broncho, though I -am bound to admit that it was not exactly a success as Vimbril. Do you -think ‘Wallypug’s Blush’ a good title,” he asked anxiously. - -“It’s a very striking one,” I admitted. - -“I shall advertise it well in the _Daily Whyer_, you know, and—Oh! -here comes the Cockatoo,” he added, as that bird came bustling into the -cell. - -“Now then, what’s this I hear?” she began, giving me a keen glance; -“‘Wallypug’s Blush’ restored your complexion. Why so it has, though I -cannot say much for it even now. However, since you have no longer a -blue face you are scarcely likely to be valuable as a curiosity, so you -had better get about your business,” and, flinging open the door, the -Cockatoo motioned me out with her crutched stick. - -You may be sure I was not long in availing myself of my liberty and -hurrying to the spot where I had last seen his Majesty. - -The stocks were empty, but a little further off I found A. Fish, Esq., -who seemed delighted to see me. - -“Well I dever!” he exclaimed; “I heard you were going to be exhibited -as a freak. What stories people do tell, to be sure.” - -I briefly explained what had happened and inquired if he knew where the -Wallypug was. - -“Oh yes, he’s gode back to the Palace,” said A. Fish, Esq. “He’s id a -rare way aboudt you.” - -So I thought it best, in order to relieve his Majesty’s anxiety, to -seek him there. - -It was now getting dusk, and seeing a light in his Majesty’s private -apartments, I went up and knocked at the door. - -“Come in!” cried a voice which I had no difficulty in recognizing, and -on opening the door I found the good little man pacing to and fro in a -state of great agitation. - -“Oh! it’s you,” he exclaimed in a relieved voice, and came forward to -welcome me eagerly. “I was just wondering how on earth I could get you -out of the Cockatoo’s clutches; she’s a wretched creature, isn’t she?” - -“Well she is a trial, certainly,” I agreed, “and I think if I were -you I should adopt some very strong measures for preventing her from -interfering as she does.” - -“Hm! yes,” said his Majesty, “let’s go and hear what the Doctor-in-Law -has to say about it; he may be able to advise us as to the best way of -putting her down, and though he will probably charge pretty stiffly for -it, his advice _is_ worth having sometimes.” - -So we went together to the Doctor-in-Law’s room. - -We were surprised to hear several voices talking excitedly within, and -when in reply to a rather impatient “Come in!” we opened the door, -we were astonished to see the Doctor-in-Law in his dressing-gown and -slippers, in busy consultation with Oom Hi, the Kangaroo, and the -Cockatoo. - -“I’ve been greatly interested in hearing of the success of ‘Wallypug’s -Blush,’” said the little man, “and am just helping Oom Hi (ahem, for a -consideration) to draw up a prospectus for turning it into a Limited -Company. In consideration of the payment to me of several thousands -of pounds, I am about to become a director, and am to be paid several -thousands more for persuading the Cockatoo to join the board too.” - -[Illustration: We were astonished to see the Doctor-in-Law in his -dressing-gown and slippers, in busy consultation with Oom-Hi, the -Kangaroo, and the Cockatoo.—Page 184. - _Wallypugland._] - -“But,” I objected, “what do you claim that ‘Wallypug’s Blush’ does?” - -“Oh, it restores people with blue complexions to their natural color, -you know.” - -“But surely there will be a very limited sale,” I said; “there cannot -be very many people with blue faces, you know.” - -“Oh, _of course_, you must try and spoil everything with your absurd -objections,” said the Cockatoo crossly. - -“Yes, I really don’t see that your contention has much weight,” said -the Doctor-in-Law. “Provided it is only advertised enough, the public -will buy _any_ rubbish, whether it does what it professes to do or not. -And we shall simply call it ‘Wallypug’s Blush _for the complexion_,’ -you know; besides, even if it doesn’t answer, we can turn it into -something else, Boot Polish or Hair Wash, you know.” - -And so seeing them so busily and enthusiastically engaged in the -business of drawing up the prospectus, we said good-night and retired -to our rooms. - - - - -CHAPTER XVI. - -“AU REVOIR.” - - -THE next morning all was excitement at the palace. The news of our -return had spread abroad, and in the morning copy of the _Daily Whyer_, -which his Majesty found on the breakfast-table when we went down, a -full and, I must say, surprisingly accurate account of the interview -appeared, together with the information that his Majesty would attend -Parliament in state in the afternoon, and that an address from the -throne would be read, in which certain changes in the Government would -be suggested. There was also a paragraph about A. Fish, Esquire’s, -lecture upon the “Unreasonableness of ability,” which the editor -advised everybody to try and hear. - -His Majesty was in quite a fluster, and we spent several hours in -preparing an elaborate written speech which he was to read out in -the afternoon; and then, having settled this and other matters to -our satisfaction, we took Kis-Smee out for a little walk just before -luncheon. - -One of the first persons we met was the Crocodile at the Lodge. He -looked once or twice at his Majesty, as if in doubt, and then at -Kis-Smee. - -On seeing the latter his eyes sparkled, and he came up and spoke at -once. - -“Hullo, Wallypug!” he began unceremoniously. - -His Majesty bowed, a little distantly I thought. - -“_What_ a fine fat dog!” exclaimed the Crocodile, pointing to Kis-Smee. -“Is he for sale?” - -“Certainly not,” said the Wallypug. - -The Crocodile sighed. “Just my luck,” he remarked, “I love dogs and I -should so enjoy taking this one home to tea with me. Perhaps you will -let him visit me sometimes. What’s his name?” - -[Illustration: “OH! REALLY, WALLYPUG, THIS IS SO SUDDEN.”] - -“Kis-Smee,” said his Majesty. - -“Oh! really Wallypug, this is so sudden,” said the Crocodile, smirking, -“I’d no idea you were so affectionate. I’m so bashful, too. I couldn’t -really think of kissing you in public.” - -“No, no!” explained his Majesty hastily—“Kis-Smee is the dog’s name; -you asked me what his name was, you know.” - -“Oh!” said the Crocodile, looking greatly disappointed. “I -misunderstood you. Very sorry, I’m sure. Well, what are you going to do -now?” - -His Majesty told him of the meeting in the afternoon, and the Crocodile -promised to come. - -“That is,” he added, “if I may bring my invalid with me.” - -“Who is that?” asked the Wallypug. - -“Oh! a very feeble old joke I’ve got staying with me,” said the -Crocodile. “I could bring him in the perambulator, you know—the one I -used to wheel the weak cup of tea about in—he’s such a nice old man.” - -“What is he, did you say?” asked his Majesty. - -“An old joke,” repeated the Crocodile, “his name is Joe Miller, and -he eats nothing but chestnuts, and even they have to be very ancient -before he can digest them. Oh! he’s a character, I can tell you. Make -you die of laughing the _first_ time you meet him; but as he always -says the same thing over and over again—for hours and hours, he is -rather trying at times. However, I will bring him along, and you can -judge for yourself.” - -We left the Crocodile then and went back to luncheon—after which we -set out for the House of Words. - -We found that quite a lot of Creatures were waiting in the lobby for -the doors to open. - -There was the Doctor-in-Law, telling a funny story to the Pig, -for which he afterwards made a charge of one pound nineteen and -elevenpence, describing it as _Professional Attendance_—and wording -the bill as follows: - - To One pig, one guinea (guinea-pig), £1 1 0 - “Laugh and grow fat,” one joke, 0 6 8 - ———————— - £1 19 11 - -And to the Mole, who happened to overhear the joke, he made another -charge; but the Mole got out of paying for it on the plea that he -_couldn’t see it_; but whether he meant the bill or the joke I could -never find out, Moles are notoriously blind. - -Oom-Hi was there and the Turtle too, and A. Fish, Esq., listened, -open-mouthed, while they discussed the state of affairs. - -The Cockatoo, irrepressible as ever, held forth on the subject of -Socialism to an interested audience, consisting of the Crocodile -and the Rabbit. While the Crow filled in a few spare moments by -interviewing the Pelican. The Creatures stood aside very politely to -allow his Majesty and myself to enter, Kis-Smee growling ominously at -the Cockatoo, who screamed, “Down with domestic animals,” as he passed. -This remark of hers gave offense to the Pig also, who demanded to know -if she was referring to him. - -[Illustration: Oom-Hi was there and the Turtle too, and A. Fish, -Esq., listened, open-mouthed, while they discussed the state of -affairs.—Page 192. - _Wallypugland._] - -“Of course not,” replied the Cockatoo; “you’re not a domestic animal, -are you?” - -“Sure an I am that same in me own counthry,” said the Pig, who was -evidently of Irish descent. - -“Och down with the dirthy landlords thin,” screamed the Cockatoo, which -caused the Pig to laugh and put him in a good temper again. - -“I couldn’t bring the old joke along after all,” whispered the -Crocodile to me, as we squeezed through the door; “he is more feeble -than ever.” “How’s Kis-Smee?” - -“Quite well, I think, thank you,” I replied. - -“Isn’t he delightfully fat,” whispered the Crocodile, smacking his -lips. “About three nice large mouthfuls, I should say,” he concluded -mysteriously, winking one eye at me. - -I haven’t the remotest idea what he meant, and besides I hadn’t time to -think about it then, for the meeting was about to commence. - -We all found seats, and A. Fish, Esq., being called upon to -open the proceedings, he commenced his learned treatise upon the -“Unreasonableness of Misunderstandability.” - -What it was all about I haven’t the remotest idea, for what with his -extraordinary way of talking, and the continual interruptions of the -animals, who would keep shouting, “Hear! hear!” “Question!” “Withdraw!” -“Order! order!” etc., at all kinds of odd moments, I could not hear -a word that was being said. Moreover, the hall was unaccountably hot -and stuffy, and for some time I had the greatest difficulty in keeping -awake; and at last my head sank down and I dozed off, awaking at -intervals when the Cockatoo was unusually energetic; but at last even -her voice was silenced, and I remember no more till I awoke with a -start, and found myself, to my great dismay, back again in my own study -in London. - -I have addressed several letters to “His Majesty the Wallypug, The -Royal Palace, Why,” as I am very anxious to know how affairs are going -on there; but I am sorry to say they have always been returned through -the post, marked in blue pencil, “_Not known. Insufficient address._” - -[Illustration: RETURNED THROUGH THE POST.] - - - - -THE BLUE DWARFS: - -AN ADVENTURE IN THURINGEN. - - “And then on the top of the Caldon Low - There was no one left but me.” - - MARY HOWITT. - - -“I LIKED the blue dwarfs the best—far, far the best of anything,” said -Olive. - -“‘The blue dwarfs!’” repeated Rex. “What _do_ you mean? Why can’t you -say what you mean plainly? Girls have such a stupid way of talking!” - -“What can be plainer than _the blue dwarfs_?” said Olive rather -snappishly, though, it must be allowed, with some reason. “We were -talking about the things we liked best at the china place. _You_ said -the stags’ heads and the inkstands, and _I_ say the blue dwarfs.” - -“But I didn’t see any dwarfs,” persisted Rex. - -“Well, I can’t help it if you didn’t. You had just as much chance of -seeing them as I had. They were in a corner by themselves—little -figures about two inches high, all with blue coats on. There were about -twelve of them, all different, but all little dwarfs or gnomes. One was -sitting on a barrel, one was turning head-over-heels, one was cuddling -his knees—all funny ways like that. Oh, they were lovely!” - -“I wish I had seen them better,” said Rex regretfully. “I do remember -seeing a tray full of little blue-looking dolls, but I didn’t notice -what they were.” - -Olive did not at once answer. Her eyes were fixed on something she -saw passing before the window. It was a very, very little man. He was -not exactly humpbacked, but his figure was somewhat deformed, and he -was so small that but for the sight of his rather wizened old face -one could hardly have believed he was a full-grown man. His eyes were -bright and beady-looking, like those of a good-natured little weasel, -if there be such a thing, and his face lighted up with a smile as he -caught sight of the two, to him, strange-looking children at the open -window of the little village inn. - -“Guten Tag,” he said, nodding to them; and “Guten Tag,” replied the -children, as they had learnt to do by this time to everybody they met. -For in these remote villages it would be thought the greatest breach of -courtesy to pass any one without this friendly greeting. - -Rex drew a long breath when the dwarf had passed. - -“Olive——” he began, but Olive interrupted him. - -“Rex,” she said eagerly, “that’s _exactly_ like them—like the blue -dwarfs, I mean. Only, of course, their faces were prettier—nice -little china faces, rather crumply looking, but quite nice; and then -their coats were such a pretty nice blue. I think,” she went on -consideringly—“I think if I had that little man and washed his face -_very_ well, and got him a bright blue coat, he would look just like -one of the blue dwarfs grown big.” - -Rex looked at Olive with a queer expression. - -“Olive,” he said in rather an awe-struck tone; “Olive, do you think -perhaps they’re _real_? Do you think perhaps somewhere in this -country—in those queer dark woods, perhaps—that there are real blue -dwarfs, and that somebody must have seen them and made the little china -ones like them? Perhaps,” and his voice dropped and grew still more -solemn; “_perhaps_, Olive, that little man’s one of them, and they may -have to take off their blue coats when they’re walking about. Do you -know, I think it’s a little, just a very little frightening? Don’t you, -Olive?” - -“No, of course I don’t,” said Olive, and, to do her justice, her rather -sharp answer was meant as much to reassure her little brother as to -express any feeling of impatience. Rex was quite a little fellow, only -eight, and Olive, who was nearly twelve, remembered that when she was -as little as that, she used sometimes to feel frightened about things -which she now couldn’t see anything the least frightening in. And she -remembered how once or twice some of her big cousins had laughed at -her, and amused themselves by telling her all sorts of nonsense, which -still seemed terrible to her when she was alone in her room in the dark -at night. “Of course there’s nothing frightening in it,” she said. “It -would be rather a funny idea, I think. Of course it can’t be, you know, -Rex. There are no dwarfs, and gnomes, and fairies now.” - -“But that little man was a dwarf,” said Rex. - -“Yes, but a dwarf needn’t be a fairy sort of person,” explained Olive. -“He’s just a common little man, only he’s never grown as big as other -people. Perhaps he had a bad fall when he was a baby—that might stop -his growing.” - -“Would it?” said Rex. “I didn’t know that. I hope I hadn’t a bad fall -when I was a baby. Everybody says I’m very small for my age.” And Rex -looked with concern at his short but sturdy legs. - -Olive laughed outright. - -“Oh, Rex, what a funny boy you are! No, certainly, you are not a dwarf. -You’re as straight and strong as you can be.” - -“Well, but,” said Rex, returning to the first subject, “I do think it’s -very queer about that little dwarf man coming up the street just as -you were telling me about the blue dwarfs. And he _did_ look at us in -a funny way, Olive, whatever you say, just as if he had heard what we -were talking about.” - -“All the people look at us in a funny way here,” said Olive. “We must -look very queer to them. Your sailor suit, Rex, and my ‘Bolero’ hat -must look to them quite as queer as the women’s purple skirts, with -bright green aprons, look to us.” - -“Or the bullock-carts,” said Rex. “Do you remember how queer we -thought them at first? _Now_ we’ve got quite used to seeing queer -things, haven’t we, Olive? Oh! now do look there—at the top of the -street—there, Olive, did you ever see such a load as that woman is -carrying in the basket on her back? Why, it’s as big as a house!” - -He seemed to have forgotten about the dwarfs, and Olive was rather glad -of it. These two children were traveling with their uncle and aunt in -a rather out-of-the-way part of Germany. Out-of-the-way, that is to -say, to most of the regular summer tourists from other countries, -who prefer going where they are more sure of finding the comforts -and luxuries they are accustomed to at home. But it was by no means -out-of-the-way in the sense of being dull or deserted. It is a very -busy part of the world indeed. You would be amazed if I were to tell -you some of the beautiful things that are made in these bare homely -little German cottages. For all about in the neighborhood there are -great manufactories and warehouses for china and glass, and many other -things; and some parts of the work are done by the people at home in -their own houses. The morning of the day of which I am telling you -had been spent by the children and their friends in visiting a very -large china manufactory, and their heads were full of the pretty and -wonderful things they had seen. - -And now they were waiting in the best parlor of the village inn while -their uncle arranged about a carriage to take them all on to the small -town where they were to stay a few days. Their aunt was tired, and was -resting a little on the sofa, and they had planted themselves on the -broad window-sill, and were looking out with amusement at all that -passed. - -“What have you been chattering about all this time?” said their aunt, -suddenly looking up. “I think I must have been asleep a little, but I -have heard your voices going on like two birds twittering.” - -“Have we disturbed you, Auntie?” asked Olive, with concern. - -“Oh no, not a bit; but come here and tell me what you have been talking -about.” - -Instantly Rex’s mind went back to the dwarfs. - -“Auntie,” he said seriously, “perhaps you can tell me better than Olive -can. Are there really countries of dwarfs, and are they a kind of -fairies, Auntie?” - -Auntie looked rather puzzled. - -“Dwarfs, Rex?” she said; “countries of dwarfs! How do you mean?” - -Olive hastened to explain. Auntie was very much amused. - -“Certainly,” she said, “we have already seen so many strange things in -our travels that it is better not to be too sure what we may not see. -But any way, Rex, you may be quite easy in your mind, that if ever you -come across any of the dwarfs, you will find them very good-natured and -amiable, only you must be very respectful—always say ‘Sir,’ or ‘My -lord,’ or something like that to them, and bow a great deal. And you -must never seem to think anything they do the least odd, not even if -they propose to you to walk on your head, or to eat roast fir-cones for -dinner, for instance.” - -Auntie was quite young—not so very much older than Olive—and very -merry. Olive’s rather “grown-up” tones and manners used sometimes to -tempt her to make fun of the little girl, which, to tell the truth, -Olive did not always take quite in good part. And it must for Olive -be allowed, that Auntie did sometimes allow her spirits and love of -fun to run away with her a little too far, just like pretty unruly -ponies, excited by the fresh air and sunshine, who toss their heads and -gallop off. It is great fun at first and very nice to see, but one is -sometimes afraid they may do some mischief on the way—without meaning -it, of course; and, besides, it is not always so easy to pull them up -as it was to start them. - -Just as Auntie finished speaking the door opened and their uncle came -in. He was Auntie’s elder brother—a good deal older—and very kind -and sensible. At once all thoughts of the dwarfs or what Auntie had -been saying danced out of Rex’s curly head. Like a true boy he flew -off to his uncle, besieging him with questions as to what sort of a -carriage they were to go on in—_was_ it an ox-cart; oh, mightn’t they -_for once_ go in an ox-cart? and might he—oh, might he sit beside the -driver in front? - -His uncle laughed and replied to his questions, but Olive stayed beside -the sofa, staring gravely at her aunt. - -“Auntie,” she said, “you’re not _in earnest_, are you, about there -being really a country of dwarfs?” - -Olive was twelve. Perhaps you will think her very silly to have -imagined for a moment that her aunt’s joke could be anything but a -joke, especially as she had been so sensible about not letting Rex get -anything into his head which could frighten him. But I am not sure that -she was so very silly after all. She had read in her geography about -the Lapps and Finns, the tiny little men of the north, whom one might -very well describe as dwarfs; there might be dwarfs in these strange -Thüringian forests, which were little spoken of in geography books; -Auntie knew more of such things than she did, for she had traveled in -this country before. Then with her own eyes Olive had seen a dwarf, and -though she had said to Rex that he was just an odd dwarf by himself as -it were, not one of a race, how could she tell but what he might be -one of a number of such queer little people? And even the blue dwarfs -themselves—the little figures in the china manufactory—rather went to -prove it than not. - -“They may have taken the idea of dwarfs from the real ones, as Rex -said,” thought Olive. “Any way I shall look well about me if we go -through any of these forests again. They must live in the forests, for -Auntie said they eat roast fir-cones for dinner.” - -All these thoughts were crowding through her mind as she stared up into -Auntie’s face and asked solemnly— - -“Auntie, were you in earnest?” - -Auntie’s blue eyes sparkled. - -“In earnest, Olive?” she said. “Of course! Why shouldn’t I be in -earnest? But come, quick, we must get our things together. Your uncle -must have got a carriage.” - -“Yes,” said he, “I have. _Not_ an ox-cart, Rex. I’m sorry for your -sake, but for no one else’s; for I don’t think there would be much -left of us by the end of the journey if we were to be jogged along the -forest roads in an ox-cart. No! I have got quite a respectable vehicle; -but we must stop an hour or two on the way, to rest the horses and give -them a feed, otherwise we could not get through to-night.” - -“Where shall we stop?” said Auntie, as with the bundles of shawls and -bags they followed the children’s uncle to the door. - -“There is a little place in the forest, where they can look after the -horses,” said he; “and I daresay we can get some coffee there for -ourselves, if we want it. It is a pretty little nook. I remember it -long ago, and I shall be glad to see it again.” - -Olive had pricked up her ears. “A little place in the forest!” she said -to herself; “that may be near where the dwarfs live: it is most likely -not far from here, because of the one we saw.” She would have liked to -ask her uncle about it, but something in the look of her aunt’s eyes -kept her from doing so. - -“Perhaps she _was_ joking,” thought Olive to herself. “But perhaps she -doesn’t know; _she_ didn’t see the real dwarf. It would be rather nice -if I did find them, _then_ Auntie couldn’t laugh at me any more.” - -They were soon comfortably settled in the carriage, and set off. The -first part of the drive was not particularly interesting; and it was so -hot, though already afternoon, that they were all—Olive especially, -you may be sure—delighted to exchange the open country for the -pleasant shade of a grand pine forest, through which their road now lay. - -“Is it a very large forest, Uncle?” said Olive. - -“Yes, very large,” he replied rather sleepily, to tell the truth: for -both he and Auntie had been nodding a little, and Rex had once or twice -been fairly asleep. But Olive’s imagination was far too hard at work to -let her sleep. - -“The largest in Europe?” she went on, without giving much thought to -poor Uncle’s sleepiness. - -“Oh yes, by far,” he replied, for he had not heard clearly what she -said, and fancied it was “the largest hereabouts.” - -“Dear me!” thought Olive, looking round her with awe and satisfaction. -“If there are dwarfs anywhere, then it must be here.” - -And she was just beginning another. “And please, Uncle, is——?” when -her aunt looked up and said lazily— - -“Oh, my dear child, do be quiet! Can’t you go to sleep yourself a -little! We shall have more than enough of the forest before we are out -of it?” Which offended Olive so much that she relapsed into silence. - -Auntie was a truer prophet than she knew; for when they got to the -little hamlet in the wood, where they were to rest, something proved to -be wrong with one of the horse’s shoes; _so_ wrong, indeed, that after -a prolonged examination, at which all the inhabitants turned out to -assist, it was decided that the horse must be re-shod before he could -go any farther; and this made it impossible for the party who had come -in the carriage to go any farther either. For the nearest smithy was -two miles off; the horse must be led there and back by the driver, -which would take at least two, if not three, hours. It was now past -six, and they had come barely half way. The driver shook his head, and -said he would not like to go on to the town till morning. The horse -had pricked his foot; it might cause inflammation to drive him farther -without a rest, and the carriage was far too heavy for the other horse -alone, which had suddenly struck the children’s uncle as a brilliant -idea. - -“There would be no difficulty about the harnessing, any way,” he said -to Auntie, laughing; “for all the vehicles hereabouts drawn by one -horse have the animal at one side of a pole, instead of between shafts.” - -But Auntie thought it better to give in. - -“It really doesn’t much matter,” she said; “we can stay here well -enough. There are two bedrooms, and no doubt they can give us something -to eat; beer and sausages, and brown bread any way.” - -And so it was settled greatly to Olive’s satisfaction; it would give -her capital opportunities for a dwarf hunt! though as to this she kept -her own counsel. - -The landlady of the little post-house where they had stopped was -accustomed to occasional visits of this kind from benighted or -distressed travelers. She thought nothing of turning her two daughters -out of their bedroom, which, it must be owned, was very clean, for -Auntie and Olive, and a second room on the ground-floor was prepared -for Rex and his uncle. She had coffee ready in five minutes, and -promised them a comfortable supper before bedtime. Altogether, -everything seemed very satisfactory, and when they felt a little -refreshed, Auntie proposed a walk—“a good long walk,” she said, “would -do us good. And the landlady says we get out of the forest up there -behind the house, where the ground rises, and that there is a lovely -view. It will be rather a climb, but it isn’t more than three quarters -of an hour from here, and we have not walked all day.” - -Uncle thought it a good idea, and Rex was ready to start at once; but -Olive looked less pleased. - -“Don’t you want to come, Olive?” said Auntie. “Are you tired? You -didn’t take a nap like the rest of us.” - -“I am a little tired,” said Olive, which was true in one sense, though -not in another, for she was quite fit for a walk. It struck her that -her excuse was not quite an honest one, so she added, “If you don’t -mind, I would rather stay about here. I don’t mind being alone, and I -have my book. And I do so like the forest.” - -“Very well,” said her uncle; “only don’t lose yourself. She is -perfectly safe,” he added, turning to her aunt; “there are neither -wolves, nor bears, nor robbers nowadays, in these peaceful forests.” - -So the three set off, leaving Olive to her own devices. She waited till -they were out of sight, then she made her preparations. - -“I’d better take my purse,” she said to herself, “in case I meet the -dwarfs. Auntie told me to be very polite, and perhaps they would like -some of these tiny pieces; they just look as if they were meant for -them.” So she chose out a few one-pfennig copper coins, which are much -smaller than our farthings, and one or two silver pieces, worth about -twopence-halfpenny each, still smaller. Then she put in her pocket half -a slice of the brown bread they had had with their coffee, and arming -herself, more for appearance’-sake than anything else, with her parasol -and the book she had with her in her traveling bag, she set off on her -solitary ramble. - -It was still hot—though the forest trees made a pleasant shade. Olive -walked some way, farther and farther, as far as she could make out, -into the heart of the forest, but in her inexperience she took no -sort of care to notice the way she went, or to make for herself any -kind of landmarks. She just wandered on and on, tempted first by some -mysterious little path, and then by another, her mind full of the -idea of the discoveries she was perhaps about to make. Now and then a -squirrel darted across from one tree to another, disappearing among the -branches almost before Olive could be sure she had seen it, or some -wild wood birds, less familiar to the little foreigner, would startle -her with a shrill, strange note. There were here and there lovely -flowers growing among the moss, and more than once she heard the sound -of not far off trickling water. It was all strangely beautiful, and she -would greatly have enjoyed and admired it had not her mind been so full -of the queer fascinating idea of the blue dwarfs. - -At last—she had wandered about for some time—Olive began to feel -tired. - -“I may as well sit down a little,” she thought; “I have lots of time -to get back. This seems the very heart of the forest. They are just as -likely to be seen here as anywhere else.” - -So Olive ensconced herself in a comfortable corner, her back against -the root of a tree, which seemed hollowed out on purpose to serve as -an armchair. She thought at first she would read a little, but the -light was already slightly waning, and the tree shadows made it still -fainter. Besides, Olive had plenty to think of—she did not require any -amusement. Queer little noises now and then made themselves heard—once -or twice it really sounded as if small feet were pattering along, or as -if shrill little voices were laughing in the distance; and with each -sound, Olive’s heart beat faster with excitement—not with fear. - -“If I sit very still,” she thought, “who knows what I may see? Of -course, it would be much nicer and prettier if the dwarfs were quite -tiny—not like the little man we saw in the street at that place—I -forget the name—for he was not pretty at all—but like the blue dwarfs -at the manufactory. But that, I suppose, is impossible, for they would -be really like fairies. But they might be something between: not so big -as the little man, and yet bigger than the blue dwarfs.” - -And then Olive grew a little confused in trying to settle in her mind -how big, or how small rather, it was possible or impossible for a -nation of dwarfs to be. She thought it over till she hardly seemed -sure what she was trying to decide. She kept saying to herself, “Any -way, they could not but be a good deal bigger than my thumb! What does -that mean? Perhaps it means more in German measures than in English, -perhaps——” - -But what was that that suddenly hit her on the nose! Olive looked up, a -very little inclined to be offended; it is not a pleasant thing to be -hit on the nose; could it be Rex come behind her suddenly, and playing -her a trick? Just as she was thinking this, a second smart tap on the -nose startled her still more, and this time there was no mistake about -it; it came from above, and it was a fir-cone! Had it come of itself? -Somehow the words, “Roast fir-cones for dinner,” kept running in her -head, and she took up the fir-cone in her fingers to examine it, but -quickly dropped it again, for it was as hot as a coal. - -“It has a very roasty smell,” thought Olive; “where can it have come -from?” - -And hardly had she asked herself the question, when a sudden noise all -round her made her again look up. They were sliding down the branches -of the tree in all directions. At first, to her dazzled eyes, they -seemed a whole army, but as they touched the ground one by one, and -she was able to distinguish them better, she saw that after all there -were not so _very_ many. One, two, three, she began quickly counting -to herself, not aloud, of course—that would not have been polite—one, -two, three, up to twelve, then thirteen, fourteen and so on up to—yes, -there were just twenty-four of them. - -“Two of each,” said Olive to herself; “a double set of the blue dwarfs.” - -For they were the blue dwarfs, and no mistake! Two of each, as Olive -had seen at once. And immediately they settled themselves in twos—two -squatted on the ground embracing their knees, two strode across a -barrel which they had somehow or other brought with them, two began -turning head-over-heels, two knelt down with their heads and queer -little grinning faces looking over their shoulders, twos and twos of -them in every funny position you could imagine, all arranged on the -mossy ground in front of where Olive sat, and all dressed in the same -bright blue coats as the toy dwarfs at the china manufactory. - -Olive sat still and looked at them. Somehow she did not feel surprised. - -“How big are they?” she said to herself. “Bigger than my thumb? Oh yes, -a good deal. I should think they are about as tall as my arm would be -if it was standing on the ground. I should think they would come up -above my knee. I should like to stand up and measure, but perhaps it is -better for me not to speak to them till they speak to me.” - -She had not long to wait. In another moment two little blue figures -separated themselves from the crowd, and made their way up to her. But -when they were close to her feet they gave a sudden jump in the air, -and came down, not on their feet, but on their heads! And then again -some of her aunt’s words came back to her, “If they should ask you to -stand on your head, for instance.” - -“Dear me,” thought Olive, “how did Auntie know so much about them? But -I do hope they won’t ask me to stand on _my_ head.” - -Her fears were somewhat relieved when the dwarfs gave another spring -and came down this time in a respectable manner on their feet. Then, -with a good many bows and flourishes, they began a speech. - -“We are afraid,” said the first. - -“That the fir-cones,” said the second. - -“Were rather underdone,” finished up the first. - -Olive really did not know what to say. She was dreadfully afraid that -it would seem so very rude of her not even to have _tasted_ the cones. -But naturally she had not had the slightest idea that they had been -intended for her to eat. - -“I am very sorry,” she said, “Mr.——, sir! my lord! I beg your pardon. -I don’t quite know what I should call you.” - -“With all respect,” said the first. - -“And considering the circumstances,” went on the second. - -Then just as Olive supposed they were going to tell her their names, -they stopped short and looked at her. - -“I beg your pardon,” she began again, after waiting a minute or two to -see if they had nothing else to say; “I don’t quite understand.” - -“Nor do we,” they replied promptly, speaking for the first time both -together. - -“Do you mean you don’t know what _my_ name is?” said she. “It’s Olive, -_Olive_” for the dwarfs stood staring as if they had not heard her. -“OLIVE!” she repeated for the third time. - -“Green?” asked the first. - -“No!” said Olive. “Of course not! _Green_ is a very common name—at -least——” - -“But you called us ‘blue,’” said the second; and it really was a relief -to hear him finish a sentence comfortably by himself, only Olive felt -very puzzled by what he said. - -“How do you know?” she said. “How could you tell I called you the blue -dwarfs?” and then another thought suddenly struck her. How very odd -it was that the dwarf spoke such good English! “I thought you were -German,” she said. - -“How very amusing!” said the dwarfs, this time again speaking together. - -Olive could not see that it was very amusing, but she was afraid of -saying so, for fear it should be rude. - -“And about the fir-cones,” went on the first dwarf. “It is distressing -to think they were so underdone. But we have come, all of us,” waving -his hand in the direction of the others, “to invite you to supper in -our village. There you will find them done to perfection.” - -Olive felt more and more uncomfortable. - -“You are very kind,” she said. “I should like to come very much if it -isn’t too far; but I am afraid I couldn’t eat any supper. Indeed, I’m -not hungry.” And then a bright thought struck her. “See here,” she went -on, drawing the half slice of bread out of her pocket, “I had to put -this in my pocket, for I couldn’t finish it at our afternoon coffee.” - -The two dwarfs came close and examined the piece of bread with the -greatest attention. They pinched and smelt it, and one of them put out -his queer little pointed tongue and licked it. - -“Not good!” he said, looking up at Olive and rolling about his eyes in -a very queer way. - -“I don’t know,” said Olive; “I don’t think it can be bad. It is the -regular bread of the country. I should have thought you would be -accustomed to it, as you live here.” - -The two dwarfs took no notice of what she said, but suddenly turned -round, and standing with their backs to Olive called out shrilly, -“Gueton Tag.” Immediately all the other dwarfs replied in the same -tone and the same words, and to Olive’s great surprise they all began -to move towards her, but without altering their attitudes—those on -the barrel rolled towards her without getting off it; the two who were -hugging their knees continued to hug them, while they came on by means -of jerking themselves; the turning head-over-heels ones span along like -wheels, and so on till the whole assemblage were at her feet. Then she -saw unfolded before her, hanging on the branches of the tree, a large -mantle, just the shape of her aunt’s travelling dust-cloak, which she -always spread over Olive in a carriage, only, instead of being drab -or fawn-colored, it was, like the dwarfs’ jackets, bright blue. And -without any one telling her, Olive seemed to know of herself that she -was to put it on. - -She got up and reached the cloak easily; it seemed to put itself on, -and Olive felt very happy and triumphant as she said to herself, “Now -I’m really going to have some adventures.” - -The dwarfs marched—no! one cannot call it marching, for they had about -a dozen different ways of proceeding—they moved on, and Olive in the -middle, her blue cloak floating majestically on her shoulders. No one -spoke a word. It grew darker and darker among the trees, but Olive -did not feel frightened. On they went, till at last she saw twinkling -before them a very small but bright blue light. It looked scarcely -larger than the lamp of a glow-worm, but it shone out very distinct in -the darkness. Immediately they saw it the dwarfs set up a shout, and -as it died away, to Olive’s surprise, they began to sing. And what do -you think they sang? Olive at first could hardly believe her ears as -they listened to the thoroughly English song of “Home, sweet Home.” -And the queerest thing was that they sang it very prettily, and that -it sounded exactly like her aunt’s voice! And though they were walking -close beside her, their voices when they left off singing did not so -much seem to stop as to move off, to die away into the distance, which -struck Olive as very odd. - -They had now arrived at the trunk of a large tree, half way up which -hung the little lamp—at least Olive supposed it must be a lamp—from -which came the bright blue light. - -“Here we are,” said one of the dwarfs, she did not see which, “at the -entrance to our village.” And thereupon all the dwarfs began climbing -up the tree, swarming about it like a hive of bees, till they got some -way up, when one after another they suddenly disappeared. Olive could -see all they did by the blue light. She was beginning to wonder if she -would be left standing there alone, when a shout made her look up, and -she saw two dwarfs standing on a branch holding a rope ladder, which -they had just thrown down, and making signs to her to mount up by it. -It was quite easy; up went Olive, step by step, and when she reached -the place where the two dwarfs were standing, she saw how it was that -they had all disappeared. The tree trunk was hollow, and there were -steps cut in it like a stair, down which the dwarfs signed to her that -she was to go. She did not need to be twice told, so eager was she to -see what was to come. The stair was rather difficult for her to get -down without falling, for the steps were too small, being intended for -the dwarfs, but Olive managed pretty well, only slipping now and then. -The stair seemed very long, and as she went farther it grew darker, -till at last it was quite dark; by which time, fortunately, however, -she felt herself again on level ground, and after waiting half a minute -a door seemed to open, and she found herself standing outside the tree -stair, with the prettiest sight before her eyes that she had ever seen -or even imagined. - -It was the dwarf village! Rows and rows of tiny houses—none of them -more than about twice as high as Olive herself, for that was quite big -enough for a dwarf cottage, each with a sweet little garden in front, -like what one sees in English villages, though the houses themselves -were like Swiss châlets. It was not dark down here, there was a soft -light about as bright as we have it at summer twilight; and besides -this each little house had a twinkling blue light hanging above the -front door, like a sign-post. And at the door of each cottage stood -one of the dwarfs, with a little dwarf wife beside him; only, instead -of blue, each little woman was dressed in brown, so that they were -rather less showy than their husbands. They all began bowing as Olive -appeared, and all the little women curtseying, and Olive seemed to -understand, without being told, that she was to walk up the village -street to see all there was to be seen. So on she marched, her blue -cloak floating about her, so that sometimes it reached the roofs of the -houses on each side at the same time. - -Olive felt herself rather clumsy. Her feet, which in general she was -accustomed to consider rather neat, and by no means too large for her -age, seemed such great awkward things. If she had put one of them in at -the window of a dwarf house, it would have knocked everything out of -its place. - -“Dear me!” thought Olive, “I had no idea _I_ could seem clumsy! I feel -like a great plowman. I wish I were not so big.” - -“Yes,” said a voice beside her, “it has its disadvantages;” and -Olive, looking down to see who spoke—she had to look down for -everything—caught sight of one of the two dwarfs with whom she had -first spoken. She felt a little ruffled. She did not like this trick -of the dwarf hearing what she thought before she said it. - -“Everything has its disadvantages,” she replied. “Don’t you find -yourself very inconveniently small when you are up in _our_ world?” - -“Exactly so,” said the dwarf; but he did not seem the least put out. - -“They are certainly very good-tempered,” said Olive to herself. Then -suddenly a thought struck her. - -“Your village is very neat and pretty,” she said; “though, perhaps—I -don’t mean to be rude, not on any account——” - -“No,” interrupted the dwarf; “Auntie told you on no account to be rude.” - -“Auntie!” repeated Olive, in astonishment; “she is not _your_ auntie!” - -“On no account,” said the dwarf, in the same calm tone, but without -seeming to take in that Olive meant to reprove him. - -“It’s no use trying to make them understand,” said Olive to herself. - -“Not the least,” said the dwarf; at which Olive felt so provoked that -she could have stamped her feet with irritation. But as _thinking_ -crossly seemed in this country to be quite as bad as _speaking_ -crossly, she had to try to swallow down her vexation as well as she -could. - -“I was going to say,” she went on quietly, “that to my taste the -village would be prettier if there was a little variety. Not all the -houses just the same, you know. And all of _you_ are so like each -other, and all your little brown wives too. Are there no _children_ -dwarfs?” - -“Doubtless. Any quantity,” was the answer. - -“Then where are they all?” said Olive. “Are they all asleep?” She put -the last question rather sarcastically, but the sarcasm seemed to be -lost on the little man. - -“Yes, all asleep,” he replied; “all asleep, and dreaming. Children -are very fond of dreaming,” he went on, looking up at Olive with such -a queer expression, and such a queer tone in his voice too, that -Olive got a queer feeling herself, as if he meant more than his words -actually said. Could he mean to hint that _she_ was dreaming? But a -remark from the dwarf distracted her thoughts. - -“Supper is ready,” he said. “They are all waiting.” And turning round, -Olive saw before her a cottage a good deal larger than the others; in -fact, it was almost high enough for her, with considerable stooping, to -get in at the door. And through the windows she saw a long table neatly -covered with a bright blue table-cloth, and spread with numbers of -tiny plates, and beside each plate a knife and fork and a little blue -glass cup. Two great dishes stood on the table, one at each end. Steam -was rising from each, and a delicious smell came out through the open -windows. - -“I did not know I was so hungry,” thought Olive; “but I do _hope_ it -isn’t fir-cones.” - -“Yes,” said the dwarf; “they’ll be better done this time.” - -Then he gave a sort of sharp, sudden cry or whistle, and immediately -all the dwarfs of the village appeared as if by magic, and began -hurrying into the house, but as soon as they were in the middle of -the passage they fell back at each side, leaving a clear space in the -middle. - -“For you,” said the first dwarf, bowing politely. - -“Do you always have supper here altogether like that?” said Olive. “How -funny!” - -“Not at all.” said the dwarf; “it’s a table d’hôte. Be so good as to -take your place.” - -Olive bent her head cautiously in preparation for passing through the -door, when again the same sharp cry startled her, and lifting her head -suddenly she bumped it against the lintel. The pain of the blow was -rather severe. - -“What did you do that for?” she exclaimed angrily. “Why did you scream -out like that? I——” But she said no more. The cry was repeated, and -this time it did its work effectually, for Olive awoke. Awoke—was it -waking?—to find herself all in the dark, stiff and cold, and her head -aching with the bump she had given it against the old tree-trunk, while -farther off now she heard the same shrill hoot or cry of some early -astir night-bird, which had sounded before in her dreams. - -“Oh dear! oh dear!” she sobbed, “what shall I do? Where am I? How -can I ever find my way in the dark? I believe it was all a trick of -those nasty blue dwarfs. I don’t believe I _was_ dreaming. They must -be spiteful goblins. I wish I had not gone with them to see their -village.” And so for some minutes, half asleep and half awake, Olive -stayed crouching by the tree, which seemed her only protector. But -by degrees, as her senses—her common sense particularly—came back -to her, she began to realize that it was worse than useless to sit -there crying. Dark as it was, she must try to find her way back to -the little inn, where, doubtless, Auntie and the others were in the -greatest distress about her, the thought of which nearly made her burst -out crying again; and poor Olive stumbled up to her feet as best she -could, fortunately not forgetting to feel for her book and parasol -which were lying beside her and slowly and tremblingly made her way -on a few steps, hoping that perhaps if she could manage to get out of -the shadow of the trees it might not be quite so dark farther on. She -was not altogether disappointed. It certainly grew a very little less -black, but that it was a very dark night there was no denying. And, -indeed, though it had not been dark, she would have had the greatest -difficulty in finding her way out of the wood, into which she had so -thoughtlessly penetrated. Terrifying thoughts, too, began to crowd -into her mind, though, as I think I have shown you, she was not at -all a timid child. But a forest on a dark night, and so far away from -everywhere—it was enough to shake her nerves. She hoped and trusted -there was no fear of wolves in summer-time; but bears!—ah! as to bears -there was no telling. Even the hooting cries of the birds which she now -and then again heard in the distance frightened her, and she felt that -a bat flapping against her would send her nearly out of her mind. And -after a while she began to lose heart—it was not quite so dark, but -she had not the very least idea where she was going. She kept bumping -and knocking herself against the trunks; she was evidently not in a -path, but wandering farther and farther among the forest trees. That -was about all she could feel sure of, and after two or three more vain -efforts Olive fairly gave up, and, sinking down on the ground, again -burst into tears. - -“If I but had a mariner’s compass,” she thought, her fancy wandering -off to all the stories of lost people she had ever heard of. Then she -further reflected that a compass would do her very little good if it -was too dark to see it, and still more as she had not the slightest -idea whether her road lay north, south, east, or west. “If the stars -were out!” was her next idea; but then, I am ashamed to say, Olive’s -ideas of astronomy were limited. She could have perhaps recognized -the Plow and the Pole star, but she could not remember which way they -pointed. Besides, she did not feel quite sure that in Thüringen one -would see the same stars as in England or Paris; and, after all, as -there were none visible, it was no good puzzling about it, only if they -_had_ been there it would not have seemed so lonely. Suddenly—what -was that in the distance? A light, a tiny light, bobbing in and out -of sight among the trees? Could it be a star come out of its way to -take pity on her? Much more likely a Will-o’-the-wisp; for she did -not stop to reflect that a dry pine forest in summer-time is not one -of Will-o’-the-wisp’s favorite playgrounds. It was a light, as to -that there was no doubt, and it was coming nearer. Whether she was -more frightened or glad Olive scarcely knew. Still, almost anything -was better than to sit there to be eaten up by bears, or to die of -starvation; and she eagerly watched the light now steadily approaching -her, till it came near enough for her to see that it was a lantern -carried by some person not high above the ground. A boy perhaps; could -it be—oh, joyful thought!—could it be Rex? But no; even if they -were all looking for her it was not likely that they would let Rex be -running about alone to get lost too. Still, it must _be_ a boy, and -without waiting to think more Olive called out— - -“Oh, please come and help me! I’m lost in the wood!” she cried, -thinking nothing of German or anything but her sore distress. - -The lantern moved about undecidedly for a moment or two, then the light -flashed towards her and came still nearer. - -“_Ach Gott!_” exclaimed an unfamiliar voice, and Olive, peering -forward, thought for half a second she was again dreaming. He was not, -certainly, dressed in blue, and he was a good deal taller than up to -her knee; but still he was—there was no doubt about it—he was a -dwarf! And another gaze at his queer little figure and bright sparkling -eyes told Olive that it was the very same little man who had smiled at -Rex and her when he saw them leaning out of the inn window that very -afternoon. - -She didn’t feel frightened; he looked so good-natured and so sorry for -her. And somehow Olive’s faith in the possible existence of a nation of -dwarfs had received a shock; she was much more inclined to take things -prosaically. But it was very difficult to explain matters. I think the -dwarf at the first moment was more inclined to take _her_ for something -supernatural than she was now to imagine him a brownie or a gnome. -For she was a pretty little girl, with a mass of golden fair hair and -English blue eyes; and with her hat half fallen off, and her cheeks -flushed, she might have sat for a picture of a fairy who had strayed -from her home. - -Her German seemed all to go out of her head. But she managed to -remember the name of the village where they had been that afternoon, -and a sudden recollection seemed to come over the dwarf. He poured out -a flood of words and exclamations, amidst which all that Olive could -understand was the name of the village and the words “_verirrt_,” -“_armes Kind_,” which she knew meant “lost” and “poor child.” Then -he went on to tell that he too was on his way from the same village -to somewhere; that he came by the woods, because it was shorter, and -lifting high his lantern, gave Olive to understand that he could now -show her the way. - -So off she set under his guidance, and, only fancy! a walk of not more -than ten minutes brought them to the little inn! Olive’s wanderings -and straying had, after all, drawn her very near her friends if she -had known it. Poor Auntie and Rex were running about in front of the -house in great distress. Uncle and the landlord and the coachman had -set off with lanterns, and the landlady was trying to persuade Auntie -that there was not _really_ anything to be afraid of; neither bears, -nor wolves, nor evilly-disposed people about: the little young lady -had, doubtless, fallen asleep in the wood with the heat and fatigue of -the day; which, as you know, was a very good guess, though the landlady -little imagined what queer places and people Olive had been visiting in -her sleep. - -The dwarf was a well-known person thereabouts, and a very harmless, -kindly little man. A present of a couple of marks sent him off to -his cottage near by very happy indeed, and when Uncle returned a few -minutes later to see if the wanderer had been heard of, you can imagine -how thankful he was to find her. It was not so _very_ late after all, -not above half-past ten o’clock, but a thunderstorm which came on not -long after explained the unusual darkness of the cloud-covered sky. - -“_What_ a good thing you were safe before the storm came on!” said -Auntie, with a shudder at the thought of the dangers her darling had -escaped. “I will take care never again to carry my jokes too far,” -she resolved, when Olive had confided to her the real motive of her -wanderings in the wood. And Olive, for her part, decided that she would -be content with fairies and dwarfs in books and fancy, without trying -to find them in reality. - -“Though all the same,” she said to herself, “I should have liked to -taste the roast fir-cones. They did smell so good!” “And, Auntie,” she -said aloud, “were you singing in the wood on your way home with Uncle -and Rex?” - -“Yes,” said Auntie, “they begged me to sing ‘Home, sweet Home.’ Why do -you ask me?” - -Olive explained. “So it was _your_ voice I heard when I thought it was -the dwarfs,” she said, smiling. - -And Auntie gave her still another kiss. - - - THE END. - - - A. L. Burt’s Catalogue of Books for Young People by Popular Writers, - 52-58 Duane Street, New York - - - - - BOOKS FOR GIRLS. - - =Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland.= By LEWIS CARROLL. 12mo, cloth, 42 - illustrations, price 75 cents. - -“From first to last, almost without exception, this story is -delightfully droll, humorous and illustrated in harmony with the -story.”—=New York Express.= - - =Through the Looking Glass, and What Alice Found There.= By LEWIS - CARROLL. 12mo, cloth, 50 illustrations, price 75 cents. - -“A delight alike to the young people and their elders, extremely funny -both in text and illustrations.”—=Boston Express.= - - =Little Lucy’s Wonderful Globe.= By CHARLOTTE M. YONGE. 12mo, cloth, - illustrated, price 75 cents. - -“This story is unique among tales intended for children, alike for -pleasant instruction, quaintness of humor, gentle pathos, and the -subtlety with which lessons moral and otherwise are conveyed to -children, and perhaps to their seniors as well.”—=The Spectator.= - - =Joan’s Adventures at the North Pole and Elsewhere.= By ALICE CORKRAN. - 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price 75 cents. - -“Wonderful as the adventures of Joan are, it must be admitted that they -are very naturally worked out and very plausibly presented. Altogether -this is an excellent story for girls.”—=Saturday Review.= - - =Count Up the Sunny Days=: A Story for Girls and Boys. By C. A. JONES. - 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price 75 cents. - -“An unusually good children’s story.”—=Glasgow Herald.= - - =The Dove in the Eagle’s Nest.= By CHARLOTTE M. YONGE. 12mo, cloth, - illustrated, price $1.00. - -“Among all the modern writers we believe Miss Yonge first, not in -genius, but in this, that she employs her great abilities for a high -and noble purpose. We know of few modern writers whose works may be so -safely commended as hers.”—=Cleveland Times.= - - =Jan of the Windmill.= A Story of the Plains. By MRS. J. H. EWING. - 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price $1.00. - -“Never has Mrs. Ewing published a more charming volume, and that is -saying a very great deal. From the first to the last the book overflows -with the strange knowledge of child-nature which so rarely survives -childhood: and moreover, with inexhaustible quiet humor, which is -never anything but innocent and well-bred, never priggish, and never -clumsy.”—=Academy.= - - =A Sweet Girl Graduate.= By L. T. MEADE. 12mo, cloth, illustrated, - price $1.00. - -“One of this popular author’s best. The characters are well imagined -and drawn. The story moves with plenty of spirit and the interest does -not flag until the end too quickly comes.”—=Providence Journal.= - - =Six to Sixteen=: A Story for Girls. By JULIANA HORATIA EWING. 12mo, - cloth, illustrated, price $1.00. - -“There is no doubt as to the good quality and attractiveness of ‘Six -to Sixteen.’ The book is one which would enrich any girl’s book -shelf.”—=St. James’ Gazette.= - - =The Palace Beautiful=: A Story for Girls. By L. T. MEADE. 12mo, - cloth, illustrated, price $1.00. - -“A bright and interesting story. The many admirers of Mrs. L. T. Meade -in this country will be delighted with the ‘Palace Beautiful’ for -more reasons than one. It is a charming book for girls.”—=New York -Recorder.= - - =A World of Girls=: The Story of a School. By L. T. MEADE. 12mo, - cloth, illustrated, price $1.00. - -“One of those wholesome stories which it does one good to read. It will -afford pure delight to numerous readers. This book should be on every -girl’s book shelf.”—=Boston Home Journal.= - - =The Lady of the Forest=: A Story for Girls. By L. T. MEADE. 12mo, - cloth, illustrated, price $1.00. - -“This story is written in the author’s well-known, fresh and -easy style. All girls fond of reading will be charmed by this -well-written story. It is told with the author’s customary grace and -spirit.”—=Boston Times.= - - =At the Back of the North Wind.= By GEORGE MACDONALD. 12mo, cloth, - illustrated, price $1.00. - -“A very pretty story, with much of the freshness and vigor of Mr. -Macdonald’s earlier work.... It is a sweet, earnest, and wholesome -fairy story, and the quaint native humor is delightful. A most -delightful volume for young readers.”—=Philadelphia Times.= - - =The Water Babies=: A Fairy Tale for a Land Baby. By CHARLES KINGSLEY. - 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price $1.00. - -“The strength of his work, as well as its peculiar charms, consist in -his description of the experiences of a youth with life under water -in the luxuriant wealth of which he revels with all the ardor of a -poetical nature.”—=New York Tribune.= - - =Our Bessie.= By ROSA N. CAREY. 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price $1.00. - -“One of the most entertaining stories of the season, full of vigorous -action, and strong in character-painting. Elder girls will be charmed -with it, and adults may read its pages with profit.”—=The Teachers’ -Aid.= - - =Wild Kitty.= A Story of Middleton School. By L. T. MEADE. 12mo, - cloth, illustrated, price $1.00. - -“Kitty is a true heroine—warm-hearted, self-sacrificing, and, as -all good women nowadays are, largely touched with the enthusiasm of -humanity. One of the most attractive gift books of the season.”—=The -Academy.= - - =A Young Mutineer.= A Story for Girls. By L. T. MEADE. 12mo, cloth, - illustrated, price $1.00. - -“One of Mrs. Meade’s charming books for girls, narrated in that simple -and picturesque style which marks the authoress as one of the first -among writers for young people.”—=The Spectator.= - - =Sue and I.= By MRS. O’REILLY. 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price 75 - cents. - -“A thoroughly delightful book, full of sound wisdom as well as -fun.”—=Athenæum.= - - =The Princess and the Goblin.= A Fairy Story. By GEORGE MACDONALD. - 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price 75 cents. - -“If a child once begins this book, it will get so deeply interested in -it that when bedtime comes it will altogether forget the moral, and -will weary its parents with importunities for just a few minutes more -to see how everything ends.”—=Saturday Review.= - - =Pythia’s Pupils=: A Story of a School. By EVA HARTNER. 12mo, cloth, - illustrated, price $1.00. - -“This story of the doings of several bright school girls is sure to -interest girl readers. Among many good stories for girls this is -undoubtedly one of the very best.”—=Teachers’ Aid.= - - =A Story of a Short Life.= By JULIANA HORATIA EWING. 12mo, cloth, - illustrated, price $1.00. - -“The book is one we can heartily recommend, for it is not only -bright and interesting, but also pure and healthy in tone and -teaching.”—=Courier.= - - =The Sleepy King.= A Fairy Tale. By AUBREY HOPWOOD AND SEYMOUR HICKS. - 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price 75 cents. - -“Wonderful as the adventures of Bluebell are, it must be admitted -that they are very naturally worked out and very plausibly presented. -Altogether this is an excellent story for girls.”—=Saturday Review.= - - =Two Little Waifs.= By MRS. MOLESWORTH. 12mo, cloth, illustrated, - price 75 cents. - -“Mrs. Molesworth’s delightful story of ‘Two Little Waifs’ will charm -all the small people who find it in their stockings. It relates the -adventures of two lovable English children lost in Paris, and is just -wonderful enough to pleasantly wring the youthful heart.”—=New York -Tribune.= - - =Adventures in Toyland.= By EDITH KING HALL. 12mo, cloth, illustrated, - price 75 cents. - -“The author is such a bright, cheery writer, that her stories are -always acceptable to all who are not confirmed cynics, and her record -of the adventures is as entertaining and enjoyable as we might -expect.”—=Boston Courier.= - - =Adventures in Wallypug Land.= By G. E. FARROW. 12mo, cloth, - illustrated, price 75 cents. - -“These adventures are simply inimitable, and will delight boys and -girls of mature age, as well as their juniors. No happier combination -of author and artist than this volume presents could be found to -furnish healthy amusement to the young folks. The book is an artistic -one in every sense.”—=Toronto Mail.= - - =Fussbudget’s Folks.= A Story for Young Girls. By ANNA F. BURNHAM. - 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price $1.00. - -“Mrs. Burnham has a rare gift for composing stories for children. With -a light, yet forcible touch, she paints sweet and artless, yet natural -and strong, characters.”—=Congregationalist.= - - =Mixed Pickles.= A Story for Girls. By MRS. E. M. FIELD. 12mo, cloth, - illustrated, price 75 cents. - -“It is, in its way, a little classic, of which the real beauty and -pathos can hardly be appreciated by young people. It is not too much to -say of the story that it is perfect of its kind.”—=Good Literature.= - - =Miss Mouse and Her Boys.= A Story for Girls. By MRS. MOLESWORTH. - 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price 75 cents. - -“Mrs. Molesworth’s books are cheery, wholesome, and particularly well -adapted to refined life. It is safe to add that she is the best English -prose writer for children. A new volume from Mrs. Molesworth is always -a treat.”—=The Beacon.= - - =Gilly Flower.= A Story for Girls. By the author of “Miss Toosey’s - Mission.” 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price $1.00. - -“Jill is a little guardian angel to three lively brothers who tease -and play with her.... Her unconscious goodness brings right thoughts -and resolves to several persons who come into contact with her. -There is no goodiness in this tale, but its influence is of the best -kind.”—=Literary World.= - - =The Chaplet of Pearls=; or, The White and Black Ribaumont. By - CHARLOTTE M. YONGE. 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price $1.00. - -“Full of spirit and life, so well sustained throughout that grown-up -readers may enjoy it as much as children. It is one of the best books -of the season.”—=Guardian.= - - =Naughty Miss Bunny=: Her Tricks and Troubles. By CLARA MULHOLLAND. - 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price 75 cents. - -“The naughty child is positively delightful. Papas should not omit the -book from their list of juvenile presents.”—=Land and Water.= - - =Meg’s Friend.= By ALICE CORKRAN. 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price - $1.00. - -“One of Miss Corkran’s charming books for girls, narrated in that -simple and picturesque style which marks the authoress as one of the -first among writers for young people.”—=The Spectator.= - - =Averil.= By ROSA N. CAREY. 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price $1.00. - -“A charming story for young folks. Averil is a delightful -creature—piquant, tender, and true—and her varying fortunes are -perfectly realistic.”—=World.= - - =Aunt Diana.= By ROSA N. CAREY. 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price $1.00. - -“An excellent story, the interest being sustained from first to -last. This is, both in its intention and the way the story is told, -one of the best books of its kind which has come before us this -year.”—=Saturday Review.= - - =Little Sunshine’s Holiday=: A Picture from Life. By MISS MULOCK. - 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price 75 cents. - -“This is a pretty narrative of child life, describing the simple doings -and sayings of a very charming and rather precocious child. This is a -delightful book for young people.”—=Gazette.= - - =Esther’s Charge.= A Story for Girls. By ELLEN EVERETT GREEN. 12mo, - cloth, illustrated, price $1.00. - -“... This is a story showing in a charming way how one little girl’s -jealousy and bad temper were conquered; one of the best, most -suggestive and improving of the Christmas Juveniles.”—=New York -Tribune.= - - =Fairy Land of Science.= By ARABELLA B. BUCKLEY. 12mo, cloth, - illustrated, price $1.00. - -“We can highly recommend it; not only for the valuable information it -gives on the special subjects to which it is dedicated, but also as a -book teaching natural sciences in an interesting way. A fascinating -little volume, which will make friends in every household in which -there are children.”—=Daily News.= - - =Merle’s Crusade.= By ROSA N. CAREY. 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price - $1.00. - -“Among the books for young people we have seen nothing more unique -than this book. Like all of this author’s stories it will please young -readers by the very attractive and charming style in which it is -written.”—=Journal.= - - =Birdie=: A Tale of Child Life. By H. L. CHILDE-PEMBERTON. 12mo, - cloth, illustrated, price 75 cents. - -“The story is quaint and simple, but there is a freshness about it that -makes one hear again the ringing laugh and the cheery shout of children -at play which charmed his earlier years.”—=New York Express.= - - =The Days of Bruce=: A Story from Scottish History. By GRACE AGUILAR. - 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price $1.00. - -“There is a delightful freshness, sincerity and vivacity about all -of Grace Aguilar’s stories which cannot fail to win the interest and -admiration of every lover of good reading.”—=Boston Beacon.= - - =Three Bright Girls=: A Story of Chance and Mischance. By ANNIE E. - ARMSTRONG. 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price $1.00. - -“The charm of the story lies in the cheery helpfulness of spirit -developed in the girls by their changed circumstances; while the author -finds a pleasant ending to all their happy makeshifts. The story is -charmingly told, and the book can be warmly recommended as a present -for girls.”—=Standard.= - - =Giannetta=: A Girl’s Story of Herself. By ROSA MULHOLLAND. 12mo, - cloth, illustrated, price $1.00. - -“Extremely well told and full of interest. Giannetta is a true -heroine—warm-hearted, self-sacrificing, and, as all good women -nowadays are, largely touched with enthusiasm of humanity. The -illustrations are unusually good. One of the most attractive gift books -of the season.”—=The Academy.= - - =Margery Merton’s Girlhood.= By ALICE CORKRAN. 12mo, cloth, - illustrated, price $1.00. - -“The experiences of an orphan girl who in infancy is left by her father -to the care of an elderly aunt residing near Paris. The accounts of the -various persons who have an after influence on the story are singularly -vivid. There is a subtle attraction about the book which will make it a -great favorite with thoughtful girls.”—=Saturday Review.= - - =Under False Colors=: A Story from Two Girls’ Lives. By SARAH DOUDNEY. - 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price $1.00. - -“Sarah Doudney has no superior as a writer of high-toned stories—pure -in style, original in conception, and with skillfully wrought out -plots; but we have seen nothing equal in dramatic energy to this -book.”—=Christian Leader.= - - =Down the Snow Stairs=; or, From Good-night to Good-morning. By ALICE - CORKRAN. 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price 75 cents. - -“Among all the Christmas volumes which the year has brought to our -table this one stands out facile princeps—a gem of the first water, -bearing upon every one of its pages the signet mark of genius.... -All is told with such simplicity and perfect naturalness that the -dream appears to be a solid reality. It is indeed a Little Pilgrim’s -Progress.”—=Christian Leader.= - - =The Tapestry Room=: A Child’s Romance. By MRS. MOLESWORTH. 12mo, - cloth, illustrated, price 75 cents. - -“Mrs. Molesworth is a charming painter of the nature and ways of -children; and she has done good service in giving us this charming -juvenile which will delight the young people.”—=Athenæum, London.= - - =Little Miss Peggy=: Only a Nursery Story. By MRS. MOLESWORTH. 12mo, - cloth, illustrated, price 75 cents. - -Mrs. Molesworth’s children are finished studies. A joyous earnest -spirit pervades her work, and her sympathy is unbounded. She loves -them with her whole heart, while she lays bare their little minds, and -expresses their foibles, their faults, their virtues, their inward -struggles, their conception of duty, and their instinctive knowledge -of the right and wrong of things. She knows their characters, she -understands their wants, and she desires to help them. - - =Polly=: A New Fashioned Girl. By L. T. MEADE. 12mo, cloth, - illustrated, price $1.00. - -Few authors have achieved a popularity equal to Mrs. Meade as a writer -of stories for young girls. Her characters are living beings of flesh -and blood, not lay figures of conventional type. Into the trials and -crosses, and everyday experiences, the reader enters at once with zest -and hearty sympathy. While Mrs. Meade always writes with a high moral -purpose, her lessons of life, purity and nobility of character are -rather inculcated by example than intruded as sermons. - - =One of a Covey.= By the author of “Miss Toosey’s Mission.” 12mo, - cloth, illustrated, price 75 cents. - -“Full of spirit and life, so well sustained throughout that grown-up -readers may enjoy it as much as children. This ‘Covey’ consists of the -twelve children of a hard-pressed Dr. Partridge out of which is chosen -a little girl to be adopted by a spoiled, fine lady. We have rarely -read a story for boys and girls with greater pleasure. One of the chief -characters would not have disgraced Dickens’ pen.”—=Literary World.= - - =The Little Princess of Tower Hill.= By L. T. MEADE. 12mo, cloth, - illustrated, price 75 cents. - -“This is one of the prettiest books for children published, as pretty -as a pond-lily, and quite as fragrant. Nothing could be imagined more -attractive to young people than such a combination of fresh pages and -fair pictures; and while children will rejoice over it—which is much -better than crying for it—it is a book that can be read with pleasure -even by older boys and girls.”—=Boston Advertiser.= - - =Rosy.= By MRS. MOLESWORTH. 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price 75 cents. - -Mrs. Molesworth, considering the quality and quantity of her labors, is -the best story-teller for children England has yet known. - -“This is a very pretty story. The writer knows children, and their ways -well. The illustrations are exceedingly well drawn.”—=Spectator.= - - =Esther=: A Book for Girls. By ROSA N. CAREY. 12mo, cloth, - illustrated, price $1.00. - -“She inspires her readers simply by bringing them in contact with the -characters, who are in themselves inspiring. Her simple stories are -woven in order to give her an opportunity to describe her characters by -their own conduct in seasons of trial.”—=Chicago Times.= - - =Sweet Content.= By MRS. MOLESWORTH. 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price - 75 cents. - -“It seems to me not at all easier to draw a lifelike child than to draw -a lifelike man or woman: Shakespeare and Webster were the only two men -of their age who could do it with perfect delicacy and success. Our own -age is more fortunate, on this single score at least, having a larger -and far nobler proportion of female writers; among whom, since the -death of George Eliot, there is none left whose touch is so exquisite -and masterly, whose love is so thoroughly according to knowledge, -whose bright and sweet invention is so fruitful, so truthful, or so -delightful as Mrs. Molesworth’s.”—=A. C. Swinbourne.= - - =Honor Bright=; or, The Four-Leaved Shamrock. By the author of “Miss - Toosey’s Mission.” 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price $1 00. - -“It requires a special talent to describe the sayings and doings of -children, and the author of ‘Honor Bright,’ ‘One of a Covey,’ possesses -that talent in no small degree. A cheery, sensible, and healthy -tale.”—=The Times.= - - =The Cuckoo Clock.= By MRS. MOLESWORTH. 12mo, cloth, illustrated, - price 75 cents. - -“A beautiful little story. It will be read with delight by every -child into whose hands it is placed.... The author deserves all the -praise that has been, is, and will be bestowed on ‘The Cuckoo Clock.’ -Children’s stories are plentiful, but one like this is not to be met -with every day.”—=Pall Mall Gazette.= - - =The Adventures of a Brownie.= As Told to my Child. By MISS MULOCK. - 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price 75 cents. - -“The author of this delightful little book leaves it in doubt all -through whether there actually is such a creature in existence as -a Brownie, but she makes us hope that there might be.”—=Chicago -Standard.= - - =Only a Girl=: A Tale of Brittany. From the French by C. A. JONES. - 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price $1.00. - -“We can thoroughly recommend this brightly written and homely -narrative.”—=Saturday Review.= - - =Little Rosebud=; or, Things Will Take a Turn. By BEATRICE HARRADEN. - 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price 75 cents. - -“A most delightful little book.... Miss Harraden is so bright, so -healthy, and so natural withal that the book ought, as a matter of -duty, to be added to every girl’s library in the land.”—=Boston -Transcript.= - - =Girl Neighbors=; or, The Old Fashion and the New. By SARAH TYTLER. - 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price $1.00. - -“One of the most effective and quietly humorous of Miss Tytler’s -stories. ‘Girl Neighbors’ is a pleasant comedy, not so much of errors -as of prejudices got rid of, very healthy, very agreeable, and very -well written.”—=Spectator.= - - =The Little Lame Prince and His Traveling Cloak.= By MISS MULOCK. - 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price 75 cents. - -“No sweeter—that is the proper word—Christmas story for the little -folks could easily be found, and it is as delightful for older readers -as well. There is a moral to it which the reader can find out for -himself, if he chooses to think.”—=Cleveland Herald.= - - =Little Miss Joy.= By EMMA MARSHALL. 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price - 75 cents. - -“A very pleasant and instructive story, told by a very charming writer -in such an attractive way as to win favor among its young readers. The -illustrations add to the beauty of the book.”—=Utica Herald.= - - =The House that Grew.= A Girl’s Story. By MRS. MOLESWORTH. 12mo, - cloth, illustrated, price 75 cents. - -“This is a very pretty story of English life. Mrs. Molesworth is one of -the most popular and charming of English story-writers for children. -Her child characters are true to life, always natural and attractive, -and her stories are wholesome and interesting.”—=Indianapolis Journal.= - - =The House of Surprises.= By L. T. MEADE. 12mo, cloth, illustrated, - price 75 cents. - -“A charming tale of charming children, who are naughty enough to be -interesting, and natural enough to be lovable; and very prettily their -story is told. The quaintest yet most natural stories of child life. -Simply delightful.”—=Vanity Fair.= - - =The Jolly Ten: and their Year of Stories.= By AGNES CARR SAGE. 12mo, - cloth, illustrated, price 75 cents. - -The story of a band of cousins who were accustomed to meet at the -“Pinery,” with “Aunt Roxy.” At her fireside they play merry games, -have suppers flavored with innocent fun, and listen to stories—each -with its lesson calculated to make the ten not less jolly, but quickly -responsive to the calls of duty and to the needs of others. - - =Little Miss Dorothy.= The Wonderful Adventures of Two Little People. - By MARTHA JAMES. 12mo, cloth, illustrated, price 75c. - -“This is a charming little juvenile story from the pen of Mrs. James, -detailing the various adventures of a couple of young children. Their -many adventures are told in a charming manner, and the book will please -young girls and boys.”—=Montreal Star.= - - =Pen’s Venture.= A Story for Girls. By ELVIRTON WRIGHT. 12mo, cloth, - illustrated, price 75 cents. - -Something Pen saw in the condition of the cash girls in a certain -store gave her a thought; the thought became a plan; the plan became -a venture—Pen’s venture. It is amusing, touching, and instructive to -read about it. - - -For sale by all booksellers, or sent postpaid on receipt of price by -the publisher, =A. L. BURT, 52-58 Duane Street, New York=. - - - - - -End of Project Gutenberg's Adventures in Wallypug-Land, by G. E. Farrow - -*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK ADVENTURES IN WALLYPUG-LAND *** - -***** This file should be named 52393-0.txt or 52393-0.zip ***** -This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: - http://www.gutenberg.org/5/2/3/9/52393/ - -Produced by Giovanni Fini, David Edwards and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This -book was produced from scanned images of public domain -material from the Google Books project.) - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will -be renamed. - -Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright -law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, -so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United -States without permission and without paying copyright -royalties. Special rules, set forth in the General Terms of Use part -of this license, apply to copying and distributing Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works to protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm -concept and trademark. Project Gutenberg is a registered trademark, -and may not be used if you charge for the eBooks, unless you receive -specific permission. If you do not charge anything for copies of this -eBook, complying with the rules is very easy. You may use this eBook -for nearly any purpose such as creation of derivative works, reports, -performances and research. They may be modified and printed and given -away--you may do practically ANYTHING in the United States with eBooks -not protected by U.S. copyright law. Redistribution is subject to the -trademark license, especially commercial redistribution. - -START: FULL LICENSE - -THE FULL PROJECT GUTENBERG LICENSE -PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU DISTRIBUTE OR USE THIS WORK - -To protect the Project Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting the free -distribution of electronic works, by using or distributing this work -(or any other work associated in any way with the phrase "Project -Gutenberg"), you agree to comply with all the terms of the Full -Project Gutenberg-tm License available with this file or online at -www.gutenberg.org/license. - -Section 1. General Terms of Use and Redistributing Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works - -1.A. By reading or using any part of this Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic work, you indicate that you have read, understand, agree to -and accept all the terms of this license and intellectual property -(trademark/copyright) agreement. If you do not agree to abide by all -the terms of this agreement, you must cease using and return or -destroy all copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in your -possession. If you paid a fee for obtaining a copy of or access to a -Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work and you do not agree to be bound -by the terms of this agreement, you may obtain a refund from the -person or entity to whom you paid the fee as set forth in paragraph -1.E.8. - -1.B. "Project Gutenberg" is a registered trademark. It may only be -used on or associated in any way with an electronic work by people who -agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement. There are a few -things that you can do with most Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works -even without complying with the full terms of this agreement. See -paragraph 1.C below. There are a lot of things you can do with Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works if you follow the terms of this -agreement and help preserve free future access to Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic works. See paragraph 1.E below. - -1.C. The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation ("the -Foundation" or PGLAF), owns a compilation copyright in the collection -of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works. Nearly all the individual -works in the collection are in the public domain in the United -States. If an individual work is unprotected by copyright law in the -United States and you are located in the United States, we do not -claim a right to prevent you from copying, distributing, performing, -displaying or creating derivative works based on the work as long as -all references to Project Gutenberg are removed. Of course, we hope -that you will support the Project Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting -free access to electronic works by freely sharing Project Gutenberg-tm -works in compliance with the terms of this agreement for keeping the -Project Gutenberg-tm name associated with the work. You can easily -comply with the terms of this agreement by keeping this work in the -same format with its attached full Project Gutenberg-tm License when -you share it without charge with others. - -1.D. The copyright laws of the place where you are located also govern -what you can do with this work. Copyright laws in most countries are -in a constant state of change. If you are outside the United States, -check the laws of your country in addition to the terms of this -agreement before downloading, copying, displaying, performing, -distributing or creating derivative works based on this work or any -other Project Gutenberg-tm work. The Foundation makes no -representations concerning the copyright status of any work in any -country outside the United States. - -1.E. Unless you have removed all references to Project Gutenberg: - -1.E.1. The following sentence, with active links to, or other -immediate access to, the full Project Gutenberg-tm License must appear -prominently whenever any copy of a Project Gutenberg-tm work (any work -on which the phrase "Project Gutenberg" appears, or with which the -phrase "Project Gutenberg" is associated) is accessed, displayed, -performed, viewed, copied or distributed: - - This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and - most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no - restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it - under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this - eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the - United States, you'll have to check the laws of the country where you - are located before using this ebook. - -1.E.2. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is -derived from texts not protected by U.S. copyright law (does not -contain a notice indicating that it is posted with permission of the -copyright holder), the work can be copied and distributed to anyone in -the United States without paying any fees or charges. If you are -redistributing or providing access to a work with the phrase "Project -Gutenberg" associated with or appearing on the work, you must comply -either with the requirements of paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 or -obtain permission for the use of the work and the Project Gutenberg-tm -trademark as set forth in paragraphs 1.E.8 or 1.E.9. - -1.E.3. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is posted -with the permission of the copyright holder, your use and distribution -must comply with both paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 and any -additional terms imposed by the copyright holder. Additional terms -will be linked to the Project Gutenberg-tm License for all works -posted with the permission of the copyright holder found at the -beginning of this work. - -1.E.4. Do not unlink or detach or remove the full Project Gutenberg-tm -License terms from this work, or any files containing a part of this -work or any other work associated with Project Gutenberg-tm. - -1.E.5. Do not copy, display, perform, distribute or redistribute this -electronic work, or any part of this electronic work, without -prominently displaying the sentence set forth in paragraph 1.E.1 with -active links or immediate access to the full terms of the Project -Gutenberg-tm License. - -1.E.6. You may convert to and distribute this work in any binary, -compressed, marked up, nonproprietary or proprietary form, including -any word processing or hypertext form. However, if you provide access -to or distribute copies of a Project Gutenberg-tm work in a format -other than "Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other format used in the official -version posted on the official Project Gutenberg-tm web site -(www.gutenberg.org), you must, at no additional cost, fee or expense -to the user, provide a copy, a means of exporting a copy, or a means -of obtaining a copy upon request, of the work in its original "Plain -Vanilla ASCII" or other form. Any alternate format must include the -full Project Gutenberg-tm License as specified in paragraph 1.E.1. - -1.E.7. Do not charge a fee for access to, viewing, displaying, -performing, copying or distributing any Project Gutenberg-tm works -unless you comply with paragraph 1.E.8 or 1.E.9. - -1.E.8. You may charge a reasonable fee for copies of or providing -access to or distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works -provided that - -* You pay a royalty fee of 20% of the gross profits you derive from - the use of Project Gutenberg-tm works calculated using the method - you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. The fee is owed - to the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark, but he has - agreed to donate royalties under this paragraph to the Project - Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation. Royalty payments must be paid - within 60 days following each date on which you prepare (or are - legally required to prepare) your periodic tax returns. Royalty - payments should be clearly marked as such and sent to the Project - Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation at the address specified in - Section 4, "Information about donations to the Project Gutenberg - Literary Archive Foundation." - -* You provide a full refund of any money paid by a user who notifies - you in writing (or by e-mail) within 30 days of receipt that s/he - does not agree to the terms of the full Project Gutenberg-tm - License. You must require such a user to return or destroy all - copies of the works possessed in a physical medium and discontinue - all use of and all access to other copies of Project Gutenberg-tm - works. - -* You provide, in accordance with paragraph 1.F.3, a full refund of - any money paid for a work or a replacement copy, if a defect in the - electronic work is discovered and reported to you within 90 days of - receipt of the work. - -* You comply with all other terms of this agreement for free - distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm works. - -1.E.9. If you wish to charge a fee or distribute a Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic work or group of works on different terms than -are set forth in this agreement, you must obtain permission in writing -from both the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation and The -Project Gutenberg Trademark LLC, the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm -trademark. Contact the Foundation as set forth in Section 3 below. - -1.F. - -1.F.1. Project Gutenberg volunteers and employees expend considerable -effort to identify, do copyright research on, transcribe and proofread -works not protected by U.S. copyright law in creating the Project -Gutenberg-tm collection. Despite these efforts, Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic works, and the medium on which they may be stored, may -contain "Defects," such as, but not limited to, incomplete, inaccurate -or corrupt data, transcription errors, a copyright or other -intellectual property infringement, a defective or damaged disk or -other medium, a computer virus, or computer codes that damage or -cannot be read by your equipment. - -1.F.2. LIMITED WARRANTY, DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES - Except for the "Right -of Replacement or Refund" described in paragraph 1.F.3, the Project -Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the owner of the Project -Gutenberg-tm trademark, and any other party distributing a Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic work under this agreement, disclaim all -liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal -fees. YOU AGREE THAT YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE, STRICT -LIABILITY, BREACH OF WARRANTY OR BREACH OF CONTRACT EXCEPT THOSE -PROVIDED IN PARAGRAPH 1.F.3. YOU AGREE THAT THE FOUNDATION, THE -TRADEMARK OWNER, AND ANY DISTRIBUTOR UNDER THIS AGREEMENT WILL NOT BE -LIABLE TO YOU FOR ACTUAL, DIRECT, INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR -INCIDENTAL DAMAGES EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH -DAMAGE. - -1.F.3. LIMITED RIGHT OF REPLACEMENT OR REFUND - If you discover a -defect in this electronic work within 90 days of receiving it, you can -receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending a -written explanation to the person you received the work from. If you -received the work on a physical medium, you must return the medium -with your written explanation. The person or entity that provided you -with the defective work may elect to provide a replacement copy in -lieu of a refund. If you received the work electronically, the person -or entity providing it to you may choose to give you a second -opportunity to receive the work electronically in lieu of a refund. If -the second copy is also defective, you may demand a refund in writing -without further opportunities to fix the problem. - -1.F.4. Except for the limited right of replacement or refund set forth -in paragraph 1.F.3, this work is provided to you 'AS-IS', WITH NO -OTHER WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT -LIMITED TO WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY OR FITNESS FOR ANY PURPOSE. - -1.F.5. Some states do not allow disclaimers of certain implied -warranties or the exclusion or limitation of certain types of -damages. If any disclaimer or limitation set forth in this agreement -violates the law of the state applicable to this agreement, the -agreement shall be interpreted to make the maximum disclaimer or -limitation permitted by the applicable state law. The invalidity or -unenforceability of any provision of this agreement shall not void the -remaining provisions. - -1.F.6. INDEMNITY - You agree to indemnify and hold the Foundation, the -trademark owner, any agent or employee of the Foundation, anyone -providing copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in -accordance with this agreement, and any volunteers associated with the -production, promotion and distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic works, harmless from all liability, costs and expenses, -including legal fees, that arise directly or indirectly from any of -the following which you do or cause to occur: (a) distribution of this -or any Project Gutenberg-tm work, (b) alteration, modification, or -additions or deletions to any Project Gutenberg-tm work, and (c) any -Defect you cause. - -Section 2. Information about the Mission of Project Gutenberg-tm - -Project Gutenberg-tm is synonymous with the free distribution of -electronic works in formats readable by the widest variety of -computers including obsolete, old, middle-aged and new computers. It -exists because of the efforts of hundreds of volunteers and donations -from people in all walks of life. - -Volunteers and financial support to provide volunteers with the -assistance they need are critical to reaching Project Gutenberg-tm's -goals and ensuring that the Project Gutenberg-tm collection will -remain freely available for generations to come. In 2001, the Project -Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation was created to provide a secure -and permanent future for Project Gutenberg-tm and future -generations. To learn more about the Project Gutenberg Literary -Archive Foundation and how your efforts and donations can help, see -Sections 3 and 4 and the Foundation information page at -www.gutenberg.org - - - -Section 3. Information about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation - -The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation is a non profit -501(c)(3) educational corporation organized under the laws of the -state of Mississippi and granted tax exempt status by the Internal -Revenue Service. The Foundation's EIN or federal tax identification -number is 64-6221541. Contributions to the Project Gutenberg Literary -Archive Foundation are tax deductible to the full extent permitted by -U.S. federal laws and your state's laws. - -The Foundation's principal office is in Fairbanks, Alaska, with the -mailing address: PO Box 750175, Fairbanks, AK 99775, but its -volunteers and employees are scattered throughout numerous -locations. Its business office is located at 809 North 1500 West, Salt -Lake City, UT 84116, (801) 596-1887. Email contact links and up to -date contact information can be found at the Foundation's web site and -official page at www.gutenberg.org/contact - -For additional contact information: - - Dr. Gregory B. Newby - Chief Executive and Director - gbnewby@pglaf.org - -Section 4. Information about Donations to the Project Gutenberg -Literary Archive Foundation - -Project Gutenberg-tm depends upon and cannot survive without wide -spread public support and donations to carry out its mission of -increasing the number of public domain and licensed works that can be -freely distributed in machine readable form accessible by the widest -array of equipment including outdated equipment. Many small donations -($1 to $5,000) are particularly important to maintaining tax exempt -status with the IRS. - -The Foundation is committed to complying with the laws regulating -charities and charitable donations in all 50 states of the United -States. Compliance requirements are not uniform and it takes a -considerable effort, much paperwork and many fees to meet and keep up -with these requirements. We do not solicit donations in locations -where we have not received written confirmation of compliance. To SEND -DONATIONS or determine the status of compliance for any particular -state visit www.gutenberg.org/donate - -While we cannot and do not solicit contributions from states where we -have not met the solicitation requirements, we know of no prohibition -against accepting unsolicited donations from donors in such states who -approach us with offers to donate. - -International donations are gratefully accepted, but we cannot make -any statements concerning tax treatment of donations received from -outside the United States. U.S. laws alone swamp our small staff. - -Please check the Project Gutenberg Web pages for current donation -methods and addresses. Donations are accepted in a number of other -ways including checks, online payments and credit card donations. To -donate, please visit: www.gutenberg.org/donate - -Section 5. General Information About Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works. - -Professor Michael S. Hart was the originator of the Project -Gutenberg-tm concept of a library of electronic works that could be -freely shared with anyone. For forty years, he produced and -distributed Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks with only a loose network of -volunteer support. - -Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks are often created from several printed -editions, all of which are confirmed as not protected by copyright in -the U.S. unless a copyright notice is included. Thus, we do not -necessarily keep eBooks in compliance with any particular paper -edition. - -Most people start at our Web site which has the main PG search -facility: www.gutenberg.org - -This Web site includes information about Project Gutenberg-tm, -including how to make donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary -Archive Foundation, how to help produce our new eBooks, and how to -subscribe to our email newsletter to hear about new eBooks. - |