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diff --git a/old/51008.txt b/old/51008.txt deleted file mode 100644 index c864e48..0000000 --- a/old/51008.txt +++ /dev/null @@ -1,724 +0,0 @@ -The Project Gutenberg EBook of Two Weeks in August, by Frank M. Robinson - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most -other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions -whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of -the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at -www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have -to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook. - - - -Title: Two Weeks in August - -Author: Frank M. Robinson - -Release Date: January 23, 2016 [EBook #51008] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: ASCII - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK TWO WEEKS IN AUGUST *** - - - - -Produced by Greg Weeks, Mary Meehan and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net - - - - - - - - - - Two Weeks in August - - By FRANK M. ROBINSON - - Illustrated by ELIZABETH MacINTYRE - - [Transcriber's Note: This etext was produced from - Galaxy Science Fiction February 1951. - Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that - the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.] - - - - - The humblest events sometimes result from the - most grandiose beginnings. You'd never imagine - space travel starting this way, for instance! - - -I suppose there's a guy like McCleary in every office. - -Now I'm not a hard man to get along with and it usually takes quite a -bit more than overly bright remarks from the office boy to bother me. -But try as I might, I could never get along with McCleary. To be as -disliked as he was, you have to work at it. - -What kind of guy was he? Well, if you came down to the office one day -proud as Punch because of something little Johnny or Josephine had -said, it was a sure cinch that McCleary would horn in with something -his little Louie had spouted off that morning. At any rate, when -McCleary got through, you felt like taking Johnny to the doctor to find -out what made him subnormal. - -Or maybe you happened to buy a new Super-eight that week and were -bragging about the mileage, the terrific pickup, and how quickly she -responded to the wheel. Leave it to McCleary to give a quick run-down -on his own car that would make you feel like selling yours for junk at -the nearest scrap heap. - -Well, you see what I mean. - -But by far the worst of it was when vacation time rolled around. You -could forgive a guy for topping you about how brainy his kids are, and -you might even find it in your heart to forget the terrific bargain he -drove to work in. But vacation time was when he'd really get on your -nerves. _You_ could pack the wife and kids in Old Reliable and roll out -to the lake for your two weeks in August. You might even break the bank -and spend the two weeks at a poor man's Sun Valley. But no matter where -you went, when you came back, you'd have to sit in silence and listen -to McCleary's account of his Vacation in the Adirondacks, or his Tramp -in the Canadian Wilds, or maybe even the Old French Quarter. - -The trouble was he always had the photographs, the ticket stubs, and -the souvenirs to prove it. Where he got the money, I'll never know. -Sometimes I'd tell the wife about it and she'd sniff and wonder what -kind of shabby house they lived in that they could afford all the other -things. I never looked him up myself. Tell you the truth, I was afraid -I'd find the McClearys lived on Park Avenue. - - * * * * * - -Now you look forward to a vacation all year, but particularly during -the latter part of July, when, what with the heat and the stuffy -office, you begin to feel like a half-done hotdog at a barbecue. I was -feeling even worse than usual as I was faced with spending my two weeks -in my own backyard, most of my vacation dough having gone to pay the -doctor. The only thing I minded was having McCleary find out about it -and seeing that phony look of sympathy roll across his fat face while -he rambled on about the vacation _he_ was going to have. - -It was lunch time and we had just finished talking about the latest on -television and what was wrong with the Administration and who'd win the -pennant when Bob Young brought up the subject of vacations. It turned -out he was due for a trip to the Ozarks and Donley was going after -wall-eye pike in northern Wisconsin. I could sense McCleary prick up -his ears clear across the room. - -"How about you, Bill?" Donley asked me. "Got any plans?" - -I winked heavily and jerked a thumb warningly toward McCleary, making -sure McCleary couldn't see the gesture. - -"My vacation is really going to be out of the world this time," I said. -"Me and the wife are going to Mars. Dry, you know. Even better than -Arizona for her sinus." - -Even with the wink they were caught off guard for a minute. - -"Mars?" Donley said feebly, edging his chair away. "Yeah, sure. Great -place. Never been there myself, though." - -Young just gaped, then grinned as he caught on. "I understand it's a -wonderful spot," he chipped in. - -I casually peeled a hard-boiled egg the wife had packed in my lunch -bucket and leaned back in my swivel chair. "It's really swell," I said -dreamily, but loud enough so McCleary couldn't help but overhear. -"Drifting down the Grand Canal at evening, the sun a faint golden disk -behind the crystal towers of Marsport...." I let my voice drift into a -long sigh and reached for Donley's sack of grapes. - -About this time McCleary had gnawed his way through a big pastrami -sandwich and waddled over. He stood there expectantly, but we carefully -ignored him. - -"Always wanted to go myself," Donley said in the same tone of voice he -would have used to say he'd like to go to California someday. "Pretty -expensive, though, isn't it?" - -"Expensive?" I raised a studiedly surprised eyebrow. "Oh, I suppose -a little, but it's worth it. The wife and I got a roomette on the -_Princess of Mars_ for $139.50. That's one way, of course." - -"Mars!" Young sighed wistfully. - -There was a moment of silence, with all three of us paying silent -tribute to the ultimate in vacations. McCleary slowly masticated a leaf -of lettuce, his initial look of suspicion giving way to half-belief. - -"Let's hear some more about it," Young said enthusiastically, suddenly -recovering from his reverie. - -"Oh, there isn't much more," I said indifferently. "We plan to stay at -the Redsands hotel in Marsport--American plan. Take in Marsport, with -maybe a side trip to Crystallite. If we have time we might even take a -waterway cruise to the North Pole...." - - * * * * * - -I broke off and dug Donley in the ribs. - -"Man, you never fished until you have a Martian flying fish at the end -of the line!" I grabbed a ruler off the desk and began using it as an -imaginary rod and reel. "Talk about fight ... oh, sorry, Mac." My ruler -had amputated part of a floppy lettuce leaf that hung from McCleary's -sandwich. - -I settled down in my chair again and started paying attention to my -lunch. "Nothing like it," I added between mouthfuls of liverwurst. - -"How about entertainment?" Young winked slyly. - -"Well, you know--the wife will be along," I said. "But some of the -places near the Grand Canal--and those Martian Mist Maidens! Brother, -if I was unattached...." - -"There ain't any life on Mars," McCleary said, suspicious again. - -All three of us looked at him in shocked silence. - -"He says there's no life on Mars!" Donley repeated. - -"You ever been there, McCleary?" I asked sarcastically. - -"No, but just the same...." - -"All right," I cut in, "then you don't know whether there is or isn't. -So kindly reserve your opinion until you know a little about the -subject under discussion." - - * * * * * - -I turned back to Donley and Young. - -"Really a wonderful place for your health. Dry, thin air, nice and cool -at night. And beautiful! From Marsport you can see low-slung mountains -in the distance, dunes of soft, red sand stretching out to them. If -I were you, Bob, I'd forget all about the Ozarks and sign up on the -rocket." - -"There ain't any rockets going to Mars," McCleary said obstinately. - -"Isn't," I corrected. "I mean, there is. Besides, McCleary, just -because you never heard of something doesn't mean it doesn't exist." - -"The government's still working on V-2," McCleary said flatly. "They -haven't even reached the moon yet." - -I sighed softly, acting disgusted at having to deal with somebody as -stupid as McCleary. "Mac, that's the government and besides they're -dealing with military rockets. And did you ever hear of the government -perfecting something before private industry? Who perfected the -telephone, the radio, television? The government? No, private industry, -of course! Private industry has always been ahead of the government on -everything, including rockets. Get on the stick, Mac." - -McCleary started in on his lettuce leaf again, looking very shrewd. - -"How come I never heard of it before now?" he asked, springing the -clincher argument. - -"Look, Mac, this is relatively new. The company's just starting, can't -afford to take full-page ads and that sort of thing. Just give 'em -time, that's all. Why, a couple of years from now you'll be spending -your vacation on Venus or Jupiter or some place like that. From now on -California and the Bahamas will be strictly old hat." - -McCleary looked half-believing. - -"Where'd you get your tickets?" - -I waved vaguely in the direction of downtown. "Oh, there must be at -least a couple of agencies downtown. Might even be able to find them in -the phone book. Look under _Interplanetary Rocket Lines_ or something -like that. You might have a little difficulty, of course. Like I say, -they're not too well advertised." - -McCleary was about to say something more, but then the one o'clock bell -rang and we went back to the office grind. - - * * * * * - -Well, McCleary didn't say anything more about it the next day, even -though we'd throw in a chance comment about Mars every now and then, as -if it were the most natural thing in the world, but Mac didn't rise to -the bait. We gradually forgot about it. - -The next couple of weeks came and went and then my two weeks in August. -Like I said before, my vacation dough had gone to pay the doctor, so I -stayed at home and watered the begonias. - -The Monday morning after vacation, we were all back in the office, if -anything looking more fagged than we had when we left. When lunch time -rolled around, Donley and Young and I piled our lunches on Donley's -desk--his desk was near a window on the north side of the building -so we could get the breeze--and talked about what we had done during -vacation. - -McCleary ambled up and like it usually does after McCleary comes -around, the conversation just naturally died down. After a two minute -silence I finally took the hook. - -"Okay, Mac," I said, "I know you're just dying to tell us. Where did -you go?" - -He almost looked surprised. "To Mars," he said, like he might have said -Aunt Minnie's. - -The three of us looked blank for a minute and then we caught on. It -took us a while to recover from laughing and my sides were still aching -when I saw McCleary's face. It definitely had a hurt look on it. - -"You don't think I did," he accused us. - -"Oh, come off it, McCleary," I said crossly. "A gag's a gag, but it can -be carried too far. Where'd you go? California, Oregon, some place like -that?" - -"I said I went to Mars," McCleary repeated hotly, "and I can prove it!" - -"Sure," I said. "Like I can prove the world's flat and it's supported -by four elephants standing on a turtle's back like the old Greeks...." - -I cut off. McCleary had thrown a couple of pasteboards on the desk and -I picked them up. The printing on it was like you see on a Pullman -ticket. It said something about a roomette, first-class passage on the -_Martian Prince_, for $154.75, and there was even a place where they -had the tax figured. In two blanks at the top of the ticket, they had -it filled out to _E. C. McCleary and wife_. The bottom half was torn -off, just like they do with train tickets. - -"Very clever," I said, "but you shouldn't have gone to all that trouble -to have these printed up." - -McCleary scowled and dropped a little bunch of kodachrome slides on the -desk. I took one and held it up to the light. It showed Mac and his -wife mounted on something that looked like a cross between a camel and -a zebra. They were at the top of a sand dune and in the distance you -could see the towers of a city. The funny thing was the towers looked a -little--but not much--like minarets and the sand dunes were colored a -beautiful pink. - -I passed it on to Donley and Young and started leafing through the -rest. They were beautiful slides. McCleary and spouse in front of -various structures in a delicately tinted marble and crystal city. -McCleary in a pink-and-black boat on a canal that looked as wide as the -Mississippi. McCleary standing on a strangely carved sandstone parapet, -admiring a sunset caused by a sun looking half as big as ours. And -everywhere were the dunes of pink sand. - -"Pictures can be faked, Mac," I said. - -He looked hurt and got some things out of his desk--a sateen pillow -with scenes like those on his snapshots, an urn filled with pink sand, -a tiny boat like a gondola, only different, a letter opener made out -of peculiar bubbly pink glass. They were all stamped "Souvenir of -Mars" and that kind of junk you don't have made up for a gag. I know -mass-produced articles when I see them. - -"We couldn't afford the first-class tour," McCleary said expansively, -"but I figure we can cover that next year." He turned to me puzzledly. -"I asked the passenger agent about the _Princess of Mars_ and he said -he had never heard of the ship. And it's Mars City, not Marsport. -Couldn't understand how you made a mistake." - -"It was easy," I said weakly. I pointed to the pasteboard ducats. -"Where'd you get these, Mac?" - -He waved generously in the direction of downtown. "Like you said, -there's a couple of agencies downtown...." - - * * * * * - -You know, sometimes I think we misjudged McCleary. It takes a while to -get to know a guy like Mac. Maybe his Louie _is_ brighter than Johnny, -and maybe his chugmobile _is_ something terrific. - -For the last few years, all on account of Mac, my two weeks in August -have really been well spent Beautiful! Why, from Mars City you can -see low-slung mountains in the distance and dunes of soft, red sand -stretching out to them. And the sunsets when you're standing on the -parapets of that delicate crystal city.... And, man, fishing in the -Grand Canal.... - -How do you get to Mars? There's probably a couple of agencies in your -own town. You can look them up in your phone book under "Vacation at -the Planets of Pleasure" or something like that. They might be a little -difficult to find, though. - -You see, they're not very well advertised yet. - - - - - -End of Project Gutenberg's Two Weeks in August, by Frank M. Robinson - -*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK TWO WEEKS IN AUGUST *** - -***** This file should be named 51008.txt or 51008.zip ***** -This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: - http://www.gutenberg.org/5/1/0/0/51008/ - -Produced by Greg Weeks, Mary Meehan and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net - - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will -be renamed. - -Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright -law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, -so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United -States without permission and without paying copyright -royalties. 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