summaryrefslogtreecommitdiff
path: root/old/50169-0.txt
diff options
context:
space:
mode:
authornfenwick <nfenwick@pglaf.org>2025-02-04 23:16:03 -0800
committernfenwick <nfenwick@pglaf.org>2025-02-04 23:16:03 -0800
commit29205d5a7a3a3d49fd4c1fe92a3354ed75f18fdb (patch)
treece7b2bbad0a35cf55857abe8b0a85080d23957d5 /old/50169-0.txt
parent9687efb51e62ae058a42cd513ae6ea78d933ac0c (diff)
NormalizeHEADmain
Diffstat (limited to 'old/50169-0.txt')
-rw-r--r--old/50169-0.txt5395
1 files changed, 0 insertions, 5395 deletions
diff --git a/old/50169-0.txt b/old/50169-0.txt
deleted file mode 100644
index 0a7d7bb..0000000
--- a/old/50169-0.txt
+++ /dev/null
@@ -1,5395 +0,0 @@
-The Project Gutenberg EBook of Hermia Suydam, by Gertrude Atherton
-
-This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most
-other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
-whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of
-the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at
-www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have
-to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook.
-
-Title: Hermia Suydam
-
-Author: Gertrude Atherton
-
-Release Date: October 10, 2015 [EBook #50169]
-
-Language: English
-
-Character set encoding: UTF-8
-
-*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK HERMIA SUYDAM ***
-
-
-
-
-Produced by Mardi Desjardins & the online Distributed
-Proofreaders Canada team (http://www.pgdpcanada.net) from
-page images generously made available by The Internet
-Archive American Libraries
-(https://archive.org/details/americana)
-
-
-
-
-
- HERMIA SUYDAM
-
-
-
- GERTRUDE FRANKLIN ATHERTON
- AUTHOR OF “WHAT DREAMS MAY COME”
-
-
-
-
- THE CURRENT LITERATURE PUBLISHING CO
- NEW YORK, SAN FRANCISCO, LONDON, AND PARIS
-
-
-
-
- COPYRIGHT, 1889.
-
- THE CURRENT LITERATURE PUBLISHING CO.
-
- [_All rights reserved._]
-
-
-
-
-
- Press of J. J. Little & Co.
- Astor Place, New York.
-
-
-
-
- Table of Contents
-
- CHAPTER I.—A SECOND AVENUE HOUSEHOLD.
- CHAPTER II.—JOHN SUYDAM GIVES HIS BLESSING.
- CHAPTER III.—BROOKLYN AND BABYLON.
- CHAPTER IV.—IN THE GREEN ROOM OF LITERATURE.
- CHAPTER V.—THE SWEETS OF SOLITUDE.
- CHAPTER VI.—SUYDAM’S LEGACY AND HERMIA’S WILL.
- CHAPTER VII.—A HEROINE IN TRAINING.
- CHAPTER VIII.—HERMIA DISCOVERS HERSELF.
- CHAPTER IX.—HELEN SIMMS.
- CHAPTER X.—A MENTAL PHOTOGRAPH GALLERY.
- CHAPTER XI.—A TAILOR-MADE FATE.
- CHAPTER XII.—THE CLUB OF FREE DISCUSSION.
- CHAPTER XIII.—OGDEN CRYDER.
- CHAPTER XIV.—IN A METROPOLITAN JUNGLE.
- CHAPTER XV.—A CLEVER TRIFLER.
- CHAPTER XVI.—A LITERARY DINNER.
- CHAPTER XVII.—AN ILLUSION DISPELLED.
- CHAPTER XVIII.—A BLOODLESS ENTHUSIAST.
- CHAPTER XIX.—TASTELESS FRUIT.
- CHAPTER XX.—A COMMONPLACE MEETING.
- CHAPTER XXI.—BACK TO THE PAST.
- CHAPTER XXII.—QUINTARD IS DISCUSSED.
- CHAPTER XXIII.—PLATONIC PROSPECTS.
- CHAPTER XXIV.—AN UNEXPECTED CONFESSION.
- CHAPTER XXV.—THE POWER OF PERSONALITY.
- CHAPTER XXVI.—HERMIA HEARS THE TRUTH.
- CHAPTER XXVII.—FIVE POINTS OF VIEW.
- CHAPTER XXVIII.—TWO HISTORIES ARE ALMOST FINISHED.
- CHAPTER XXIX.—AN EPOCH-MAKING DEPARTURE.
- CHAPTER XXX.—THROUGH THE SNOW.
- CHAPTER XXXI.—THE DYKMAN REPRIMAND.
- CHAPTER XXXII.—FUTURITY.
- CHAPTER XXXIII.—CHAOS.
- CHAPTER XXXIV.—LIFE FROM DEATH.
- CHAPTER XXXV.—IDEALS RESTORED.
- CHAPTER XXXVI.—AN AWAKENING.
- CHAPTER XXXVII.—THE DOCTRINE OF THE INEVITABLE.
- CHAPTER XXXVIII.—BETWEEN DAY AND NIGHT.
- CHAPTER XXXIX.—THE REALIZATION OF IDEALS.
-
-
-
-
- _FROM HERBERT SPENCER’S CHAPTER ON “THE WILL.”_
-
-_To say that the performance of the action is the result of his free
-will is to say that he determines the cohesion of the psychical states
-which arouse the action; and as these psychical states constitute
-himself at the moment, this is to say that these psychical states
-determine their own cohesion, which is absurd. These cohesions have been
-determined by experiences—the greater part of them, constituting what
-we call his natural character, by the experiences of antecedent
-organisms, and the rest by his own experiences. The changes which at
-each moment take place in his consciousness are produced by this
-infinitude of previous experiences registered in his nervous structure,
-co-operating with the immediate impressions on his senses; the effects
-of these combined factors being in every sense qualified by the
-psychical state, general or local, of his organism._
-
-
-
-
- HERMIA SUYDAM
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER I.
-
-
- A SECOND AVENUE HOUSEHOLD.
-
-When Crosby Suydam died and left exactly enough money to bury himself,
-his widow returned to New York, and, taking her two little girls by the
-hand, presented herself at the old Suydam mansion on Second Avenue. “You
-must either take care of us or see us go to the poor-house,” she said to
-her brother-in-law; “I am not strong enough to work, and my relatives
-are as poor as myself.” And she sank into one of the library chairs with
-that air of indifference and physical weakness which makes a man more
-helpless than defiance or curse. Did John Suydam still, in his withered,
-yellow frame, carry a shrunken remnant of that pliable organ called the
-heart? His brother’s widow did not add this problem to the others of her
-vexed existence—she had done with problems forever—but in his little
-world the legend was whispered that, many years before, the last
-fragment had dried and crumbled to dust. It must be either dust or a
-fossil; and, if the latter, it would surely play a merry clack and
-rattle with its housing skeleton every time the old man drew a long
-breath or hobbled across the room.
-
-John Suydam’s age was another problem. His neighbors said that the
-little yellow old man was their parents’ contemporary. That he had ever
-had any youth those parents denied. He was many years older than Crosby
-Suydam, however, and the world had blamed him sharply for his treatment
-of his younger brother. Crosby had been wealthy when he married, and a
-great favorite. Some resentment was felt when he chose a New England
-girl for his wife; but Mrs. Suydam entertained so charmingly that
-society quickly forgave both, and filled their drawing-rooms whenever
-bidden. For ten years these two young people were illuminating stars in
-the firmament of New York society; then they swept down the horizon like
-meteors on a summer’s night. Crosby had withdrawn his fortune from the
-securities in which his father had left it, and blown bubbles up and
-down Wall street for a year or so. At the end of that time he possessed
-neither bubbles nor suds. He drifted to Brooklyn, and for ten years
-more, struggled along, at one clerkship or another, his brother never
-lending him a dollar, nor offering him the shelter of his roof. He
-dropped out of life as he had dropped out of the world, which had long
-since forgotten both him and his unhappy young wife.
-
-But, if John Suydam had no heart, he had pride. New York, in his
-opinion, should have been called Suydam, and the thought of one of his
-name in the poor-house aroused a passion stronger than avarice. He told
-his sister-in-law that she could stay, that he would give her food and
-shelter and a hundred dollars a year on condition that she would take
-care of her own rooms—he could not afford another servant.
-
-It was a strange household. Mrs. Suydam sat up in her room all day with
-her two little girls and in her passive, mechanical way, heard their
-lessons, or helped them make their clothes. Her brother she met only at
-the table. At those awful meals not a word was ever spoken. John, who
-had atrocious table manners, crunched his food audibly for a half-hour
-at breakfast, an hour and a half at dinner, and an hour at supper. Mrs.
-Suydam, whose one desire was to die, accepted the hint he unconsciously
-gave, and swallowed her food whole; if longevity and mastication were
-correlatives, it was a poor rule that would not work both ways. She died
-before the year was out; not of indigestion, however, but of relaxation
-from the terrible strain to which her delicate constitution had been
-subjected during the ten preceding years.
-
-John Suydam had her put in the family vault, under St. Mark’s, as
-economically as possible, then groaned in spirit as he thought of the
-two children left on his hands. He soon discovered that they would give
-him no trouble. Bessie Suydam was a motherly child, and adversity had
-filled many of the little store-rooms in her brain with a fund of
-common-sense, which, in happier conditions, might have been carried by.
-She was sixteen and Hermia was nine. The day after the funeral she
-slipped into her mother’s place, and her little sister never missed the
-maternal care. Their life was monotonous. Bessie did not know her
-neighbors, although her grandparents and theirs had played together.
-When Mrs. Suydam had come to live under her brother-in-law’s roof, the
-neighborhood had put its dislike of John Suydam aside and called at
-once. It neither saw Mrs. Suydam, nor did its kindness ever receive the
-slightest notice; and, with a sigh of relief, it forgot both her and her
-children.
-
-A few months after Mrs. Suydam’s death another slight change occurred in
-the household. A fourth mendicant relative appeared and asked for help.
-He was a distant cousin, and had been a schoolmate of John Suydam in
-that boyhood in which no one but himself believed. He had spent his life
-in the thankless treadmill of the teacher. Several years before, he had
-been pushed out of the mill by younger propounders of more fashionable
-methods, and after his savings were spent he had no resource but John
-Suydam.
-
-Suydam treated him better than might have been expected. These two
-girls, whom a malignant fate had flung upon his protection, must be
-educated, and he was unwilling to incur the expenses of a school or
-governess. The advent of William Crosby laid the question at rest. John
-told him that he would give him a home and a hundred dollars a year if
-he would educate his nieces, and the old man was glad to consent.
-
-The professor taught the girls conscientiously, and threw some sunshine
-into their lives. He took them for a long walk every day, and showed
-them all the libraries, the picture galleries, and the shops. In spite
-of the meanness of her garb, Bessie attracted some attention during
-these ramblings; she had the pretty American face, and the freshness of
-morning was in it. Poor Hermia, who obediently trotted behind, passed
-unnoticed. Nature, who had endowed the rest of her family so kindly—her
-father and mother had been two of the old dame’s proudest works—had
-passed her by in a fit of abstraction. Under her high, melancholy
-forehead and black, heavy brows, stared solemnly a pair of unmistakably
-green eyes—even that hypocrite Politeness would never name them gray.
-Her dull, uninteresting hair was brushed severely back and braided in a
-tight pig-tail; and her sallow cheeks were in painful contrast to the
-pink and white of her sister’s delicate skin. Her eyelashes were thick
-and black, and she had the small, admirably shaped hands and feet of the
-Suydams, but the general effect was unattractive. She was a cold,
-reserved child, and few people liked her.
-
-The professor took the girls to the theater one night, and it was a
-memorable night in their lives. Each was in a fever of excitement, and
-each manifested it characteristically. Bessie’s cheeks were flushed to
-her eyelashes, and she jerked the buttons off both gloves. Her gray eyes
-shone and her pink lips were parted. People stared at her as she passed
-and wondered who she was. But for once in her life she was blind to
-admiration; she was going to see a play! Hermia was paler than ever and
-almost rigid. Her lips were firmly compressed, but her hands, in her
-little woolen gloves, were burning, and her eyes shone like a cat’s in
-the dark. They sat in the gallery, but they were in the front row, and
-as content as any jeweled dame in box or parquette.
-
-The play was Monte Cristo, and what more was needed to perfect the
-delight of two girls confronted with stage illusion for the first time?
-Bessie laughed and wept, and rent her gloves to shreds with the
-vehemence of her applause. Hermia sat on the extreme edge of the seat,
-and neither laughed, wept, nor applauded. Her eyes, which never left the
-stage, grew bigger and bigger, her face paler, and her nostrils more
-tense.
-
-After the play was over she did not utter a word until she got home; but
-the moment she reached the bedroom which the sisters shared in common
-she flung herself on the floor and shrieked for an hour. Bessie, who was
-much alarmed, dashed water over her, shook her, and finally picked her
-up and rocked her to sleep. The next morning Hermia was as calm as
-usual, but she developed, soon after, a habit of dreaming over her books
-which much perplexed her sister. Bessie dreamed a little too, but she
-always heard when she was spoken to, and Hermia did not.
-
-One night, about three months after the visit to the theater, the girls
-were in their room preparing for bed. Hermia was sitting on the
-hearth-rug taking off her shoes, and Bessie was brushing her long hair
-before the glass and admiring the reflection of her pretty face.
-
-“Bessie,” said Hermia, leaning back and clasping her hands about her
-knee, “what is your ambition in life?”
-
-Bessie turned and stared down at the child, then blushed rosily. “I
-should like to have a nice, handsome husband and five beautiful
-children, all dressed in white with blue sashes. And I should like to
-have a pretty house on Fifth Avenue, and a carriage, and lots of novels.
-And I should like to go to Europe and see all the picture-galleries and
-churches.” She had been addressing herself in the glass, but she
-suddenly turned and looked down at Hermia.
-
-“What is your ambition?” she asked.
-
-“To be the most beautiful woman in the world!” exclaimed the child
-passionately.
-
-Bessie sat down on a hassock. She felt but did not comprehend that
-agonized longing for the gift which nature had denied, and which woman
-holds most dear. She had always been pretty and was somewhat vain, but
-she had known little of the power of beauty, and power and uncomeliness
-alone teach a woman beauty’s value. But she was sympathetic, and she
-felt a vague pity for her sister. She thought it better, however, to
-improve the occasion.
-
-“Beauty is nothing in itself,” she said, gently; “you must be good and
-clever, and then people will think——”
-
-“Bessie,” interrupted Hermia, as if she had not heard, “do you think I
-will _ever_ be pretty?”
-
-Bessie hesitated. She was very conscientious, but she was also very
-tender-hearted. For a moment there was a private battle, then conscience
-triumphed. “No,” she said, regretfully, “I am afraid you never will be,
-dear.”
-
-She was looking unusually lovely herself as she spoke. Her shoulders
-were bare and her chemise had dropped low on her white bosom. Her eyes
-looked black in the lamp’s narrow light, and her soft, heavy hair
-tumbled about her flushed face and slender, shapely figure. Hermia gazed
-at her for a moment, and then with a suppressed cry sprang forward and
-tore her sharp nails across her sister’s cheek.
-
-Bessie gave a shriek of pain and anger, and, catching the panting,
-struggling child, slapped her until her arm ached. “There!” she
-exclaimed, finally, shaking her sister until the child’s teeth clacked
-together, “you little tiger cat! You sha’n’t have any supper for a
-week.” Then she dropped Hermia suddenly and burst into tears. “Oh, it is
-dreadfully wicked to lose one’s temper like that; but my poor face!” She
-rubbed the tears from her eyes and, standing up, carefully examined her
-wounds in the glass. She heaved a sigh of relief; they were not very
-deep. She went to the washstand and bathed her face, then returned to
-her sister. Hermia stood on the hearth-rug. She had not moved since
-Bessie dropped her hands from her shoulders.
-
-Bessie folded her arms magisterially and looked down upon the culprit,
-her delicate brows drawn together, her eyes as severe as those of an
-angel whose train has been stepped on. “Are you not sorry?” she demanded
-sternly.
-
-Hermia gazed at her steadily for a moment. “Yes,” she said, finally, “I
-am sorry, and I’ll never get outside-mad again as long as I live. I’ve
-made a fool of myself.” Then she marched to the other side of the room
-and went to bed.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER II.
-
-
- JOHN SUYDAM GIVES HIS BLESSING.
-
-One day a bank clerk came up to the quiet house with a message to John
-Suydam. As he was leaving he met Bessie in the hall. Each did what wiser
-heads had done before—they fell wildly and uncompromisingly in love at
-first sight. How Frank Mordaunt managed to find an excuse for speaking
-to her he never remembered, nor how he had been transported from the
-hall into the dingy old drawing-room. At the end of an hour he was still
-there, seated on a sofa of faded brocade, and looking into the softest
-eyes in the world.
-
-After that he came every evening. John Suydam knew nothing of it.
-Bessie, from the parlor window, watched Mordaunt come down the street
-and opened the front door herself; the old man, crouching over his
-library fire, heard not an echo of the whispers on the other side of the
-wall.
-
-Poor Bessie! Frank Mordaunt was the first young man with whom she had
-ever exchanged a half-dozen consecutive sentences. No wonder her heart
-beat responsively to the first love and the first spoken admiration.
-Mordaunt, as it chanced, was not a villain, and the rôle of victim was
-not offered to Bessie. She was used to economy, he had a fair salary,
-and they decided to be married at once. When they had agreed upon the
-date, Bessie summoned up her courage and informed her uncle of her
-plans. He made no objection; he was probably delighted to get rid of
-her; and as a wedding-gift he presented her with—Hermia.
-
-“I like her better than I do you,” he said, “for she has more brains in
-her little finger than you have in your whole head; and she will never
-be contented with a bank clerk. But I cannot be bothered with children.
-I will pay you thirty dollars a quarter for her board, and William
-Crosby can continue to teach her. I hope you will be happy, Elizabeth;
-but marriage is always a failure. You can send Hermia to me every
-Christmas morning, and I will give her twenty-five dollars with which to
-clothe herself during the year. I shall not go to the wedding. I dislike
-weddings and funerals. There should be no periods in life, only commas.
-When a man dies he doesn’t mind the period; he can’t see it. But he need
-not remind himself of it. You can go.”
-
-Bessie was married in a pretty white gown, made from an old one of her
-mother’s, and St. Mark’s had never held a daintier bride. No one was
-present but Mordaunt’s parents, the professor, who was radiant, and
-Hermia, who was the only bridesmaid. But it was a fair spring morning,
-the birds were singing in an eager choir, and the altar had been
-decorated with a few greens and flowers by the professor and Hermia. At
-the conclusion of the service the clergyman patted Bessie on the head
-and told her he was sure she would be happy, and the girl forgot her
-uncle’s benediction.
-
-“Bessie,” said Hermia an hour later, as they were walking toward their
-new home, “I will never be married until I can have a dress covered with
-stars like those Hans Andersen’s princesses carried about in a nutshell
-when they were disguised as beggar-maids, and until I can be married in
-a grand cathedral and have a great organ just pealing about me, and a
-white-robed choir singing like seraphs, and roses to walk on——”
-
-“Hermia,” said Bessie dreamily, “I wish you would not talk so much, and
-you shouldn’t wish for things you can never have.”
-
-“I will have them,” exclaimed the child under her breath. “I will! I
-will!”
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER III.
-
-
- BROOKLYN AND BABYLON.
-
-Thirteen years passed. Bessie had three of her desired children and a
-nice little flat in Brooklyn. Reverses and trials had come, but on the
-whole Mordaunt was fairly prosperous, and they were happy. The children
-did not wear white dresses and blue sashes; they were generally to be
-seen in stout ginghams and woolen plaids, but they were chubby, healthy,
-pretty things, and their mother was as proud of them as if they had
-realized every detail of her youthful and ambitious dreams.
-
-Bessie’s prettiness had gone with her first baby, as American prettiness
-is apt to do, but the sweetness of her nature remained and shone through
-her calm eyes and the lines of care about her mouth. She had long since
-forgotten to sigh over the loss of her beauty, she had so little time;
-but she still remembered to give a deft coil to her hair, and her plain
-little gowns were never dowdy. She knew nothing about modern decorative
-art, and had no interest in hard-wood floors or dados; but her house was
-pretty and tasteful in the old-fashioned way, and in her odd moments she
-worked at cross-stitch.
-
-And Hermia? Poor girl! She had not found the beauty her sister had lost.
-Her hair was still the same muddy blonde-brown, although with a latent
-suggestion of color, and she still brushed it back with the severity of
-her childhood. Nothing, she had long since concluded, could beautify
-her, and she would waste no time in the attempt. She was a trifle above
-medium height, and her thin figure bent a little from the waist. Her
-skin was as sallow as of yore, and her eyes were dull. She had none of
-Bessie’s sweetness of expression; her cold, intellectual face just
-escaped being sullen. Her health was what might be expected of a girl
-who exercised little and preferred thought to sleep. She had kept the
-promise made the night she had scratched her sister’s face; during the
-past fifteen years no one had seen her lose her self-control for a
-moment. She was as cold as a polar night, and as impassive as an
-Anglo-American. She was very kind to her sister, and did what she could
-to help her. She taught the children; and, though with much private
-rebellion, she frequently made their clothes and did the marketing.
-Frank and Bessie regarded her with awe and distant admiration, but the
-children liked her. The professor had taught her until he could teach
-her no more, and then had earned his subsistence by reading aloud to
-John Suydam. A year or two before, he had departed for less material
-duties, with few regrets.
-
-But, if Hermia no longer studied, she belonged to several free libraries
-and read with unflagging vigor. Of late she had taken a deep interest in
-art, and she spent many hours in the picture galleries of New York.
-Moreover, she grasped any excuse which took her across the river. With
-all the fervor of her silent soul she loved New York and hated Brooklyn.
-
-She was sitting in the dining-room one evening, helping Lizzie, the
-oldest child, with her lessons. Lizzie was sleepy, and was droning
-through her multiplication table, when she happened to glance at her
-aunt. “You are not paying attention,” she exclaimed, triumphantly; “I
-don’t believe you’ve heard a word of that old table, and I’m not going
-to say it over again.”
-
-Hermia, whose eyes had been fixed vacantly on the fire, started and took
-the book from Lizzie’s lap. “Go to bed,” she said; “you are tired, and
-you know your tables very well.”
-
-Lizzie, who was guiltily conscious that she had never known her tables
-less well, accepted her release with alacrity, kissed her aunt
-good-night, and ran out of the room.
-
-Hermia went to the window and opened it. It looked upon walls and
-fences, but lineaments were blotted out to-night under a heavy fall of
-snow. Beyond the lower roofs loomed the tall walls of houses on the
-neighboring street, momentarily discernible through the wind-parted
-storm.
-
-Hermia pushed the snow from the sill, then closed the window with a
-sigh. The snow and the night were the two things in her life that she
-loved. They were projected into her little circle from the grand whole
-of which they were parts, and were in no way a result of her
-environment.
-
-She went into the sitting-room and sat down by the table. She took up a
-book and stared at its unturned pages for a quarter of an hour. Then she
-raised her eyes and looked about her. Mordaunt was sitting in an
-easy-chair by the fire, smoking a pipe and reading a magazine story
-aloud to his wife, who sat near him, sewing. Lizzie had climbed on his
-lap, and with her head against his shoulder was fast asleep.
-
-Hermia took up a pencil and made a calculation on the fly-leaf of her
-book. It did not take long, but the result was a respectable sum—4,620.
-Allowing for her sister’s brief illnesses and for several minor
-interruptions, she had looked upon that same scene, varied in trifling
-details, just about 4,620 times in the past thirteen years. She rose
-suddenly and closed her book.
-
-“Good-night,” she said, “I am tired. I am going to bed.”
-
-Mordaunt muttered “good-night” without raising his eyes; but Bessie
-turned her head with an anxious smile.
-
-“Good-night,” she said; “I think you need a tonic. And would you mind
-putting Lizzie to bed? I am so interested in this story. Frank, carry
-her into the nursery.”
-
-Hermia hesitated a moment, as if she were about to refuse, but she
-turned and followed Frank into the next room.
-
-She undressed the inert, protesting child and tucked her in bed. Then
-she went to her room and locked the door. She lit the gas mechanically
-and stood still for a moment. Then she threw herself on the bed, and
-flung herself wildly about. After a time she clasped her hands tightly
-about the top of her head and gazed fixedly at the ceiling. Her family
-would not have recognized her in that moment. Her disheveled hair clung
-about her flushed face, and through its tangle her eyes glittered like
-those of a snake. For a few moments her limbs were as rigid as if the
-life had gone out of them. Then she threw herself over on her face and
-burst into a wild passion of weeping. The hard, inward sobs shook her
-slender body as the screw shakes the steamer.
-
-“How I hate it! How I hate it! How I hate it!” she reiterated, between
-her paroxysms. “O God! is there nothing—nothing—nothing in life but
-this? Nothing but hideous monotony—and endless days—and thousands and
-thousands of hours that are as alike as grains of sand?”
-
-She got up suddenly and filling a basin with water thrust her head into
-it. The water was as cold as melting ice, and when she had dried her
-hair she no longer felt as if her brain were trying to force its way
-through the top of her skull.
-
-Hermia, like many other women, lived a double life. On the night when,
-under the dramatic illusion of Monte Cristo, her imagination had
-awakened with a shock which rent the film of childhood from her brain,
-she had found a dream-world of her own. The prosaic never suspected its
-existence; the earth’s millions who dwelt in the same world cared
-nothing for any kingdom in it but their own; she was sovereign of a vast
-domain wrapped in the twilight mystery of dreamland, but peopled with
-obedient subjects conceived and molded in her waking brain. She walked
-stoically through the monotonous round of her daily life; she took a
-grim and bitter pleasure in fulfilling every duty it developed, and she
-never neglected the higher duty she owed her intellect; but when night
-came, and the key was turned in her door, she sprang from the life she
-abhorred into the world of her delight. She would fight sleep off for
-hours, for sleep meant temporary death, and the morning a return to
-material existence. A ray of light from the street-lamp struggled
-through the window, and, fighting with the shadows, filled the ugly,
-common little room with glamour and illusion. The walls swept afar and
-rolled themselves into marble pillars that towered vaporously in the
-gloom. Beyond, rooms of state and rooms of pleasure ceaselessly
-multiplied. On the pictured floors lay rugs so deep that the echo of a
-lover’s footfall would never go out into eternity. From the enameled
-walls sprang a vaulted ceiling painted with forgotten art. Veils of
-purple stuffs, gold-wrought, jewel-fringed, so dense that the roar of a
-cannon could not have forced its way into the stillness of that room,
-masked windows and doors. From beyond those pillars, from the far
-perspective of those ever-doubling chambers came the plash of waters,
-faint and sweet as the music of the bulbul. The bed, aloft on its dais,
-was muffled in lace which might have fringed a mist. Hidden in the
-curving leaves of pale-tinted lotus flowers were tiny flames of light,
-and in an urn of agate burned perfumed woods. * * *
-
-For this girl within her unseductive frame had all the instincts of a
-beautiful woman, for the touch of whose lips men would dig the grave of
-their life’s ambitions. That kiss it was the passionate cry of her heart
-to give to lips as warm and imploring as her own. She would thrust
-handfuls of violets between her blankets, and imagine herself lying by
-the sea in a nest of fragrance. Her body longed for the softness of
-cambric and for silk attire; her eye for all the beauty that the hand of
-man had ever wrought.
-
-When wandering among those brain-born shadows of hers, she was
-beautiful, of course; and, equally inferable, those dreams had a hero.
-This lover’s personality grew with her growth and changed with every
-evolution of the mind that had given it birth; but, strangely enough,
-the lover himself had retained his proportions and lineaments from the
-day of his creation. Is it to be supposed that Hermia was wedded
-peacefully to her ideal, and that together they reigned over a vast
-dominion of loving and respectful subjects? Not at all. If there was one
-word in the civilized vocabulary that Hermia hated it was that word
-“marriage.” To her it was correlative with all that was commonplace;
-with a prosaic grind that ate and corroded away life and soul and
-imagination; with a dreary and infinite monotony. Bessie Mordaunt’s
-peaceful married life was hideous to her sister. Year after
-year,—neither change nor excitement, neither rapture nor anguish, nor
-romance nor poetry, neither ambition nor achievement, nor recognition
-nor power! Nothing of mystery, nothing of adventure; neither palpitation
-of daring nor quiver of secrecy; nothing but kisses of calm affection,
-babies, and tidies! 4,620 evenings of calm, domestic bliss; 4,620 days
-of placid, housewifely duties! To Hermia such an existence was a tragedy
-more appalling than relentless immortality. Bessie had her circle of
-friends, and in each household the tragedy was repeated; unless, mayhap,
-the couple were ill-mated, when the tragedy became a comedy, and a
-vulgar one at that.
-
-Hermia’s hatred of marriage sprang not from innate immorality, but from
-a strongly romantic nature stimulated to abnormal extreme by the
-constant, small-beer wave-beats of a humdrum, uniform, ever-persisting,
-abhorred environment. If no marriage-bells rang over her cliffs and
-waters and through her castle halls, her life was more ideally perfect
-than any life within her ken which drowsed beneath the canopy of law and
-church. Regarding the subject from the point of view to which her nature
-and conditions had focused her mental vision, love needed the
-exhilarating influence of liberty, the stimulation of danger, and the
-enchantment of mystery.
-
-Of men practically she knew little. There were young men in her sister’s
-circle, and Mordaunt occasionally brought home his fellow clerks; but
-Hermia had never given one of them a thought. They were limited and
-commonplace, and her reputation for intellectuality had the effect of
-making them appear at their worst upon those occasions when
-circumstances compelled them to talk to her. And she had not the beauty
-to win forgiveness for her brains. She appreciated this fact and it
-embittered her, little as she cared for her brother’s uninteresting
-friends, and sent her to the depths of her populous soul.
-
-The books she read had their influence upon that soul-population. The
-American novel had much the same effect upon her as the married life of
-her sister and her sister’s friends. She cared for but little of the
-literature of France, and the best of it deified love and scorned the
-conventions. She reveled in mediæval and ancient history and loved the
-English poets, and both poets and history held aloft, on pillars of
-fragrant and indestructible wood, her own sad ideality.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER IV.
-
-
- IN THE GREEN ROOM OF LITERATURE.
-
-Hermia’s imagination in its turn demanded a safety-valve; she found it
-necessary, occasionally, to put her dreams into substance and sequence.
-In other words she wrote. Not prose. She had neither the patience nor
-the desire. Nor did she write poetry. She believed that no woman, save
-perhaps time-enveloped Sappho, ever did, and she had no idea of adding
-her pseudonym to the list of failures. When her brain became
-overcharged, she dashed off verses, wildly romantic, and with a pen
-heated white. There was a wail and an hysterical passion in what she
-wrote that took the hearts of a large class of readers by storm, and her
-verses found prompt acceptance by the daily and weekly papers. She had
-as yet aspired to nothing higher. She was distinctly aware that her
-versification was crude and her methods faulty. To get her verses into
-the magazines they must be fairly correct and almost proper, and both
-attainments demanded an amount of labor distasteful to her impatient
-nature. Of late, scarcely a week had passed without the appearance of
-several metrical contributions over the signature “Quirus;” and the wail
-and the passion were growing more piercing and tumultuous. The readers
-were moved, interested, or amused, according to their respective
-natures.
-
-The morning after the little arithmetical problem, Hermia arose early
-and sat down at her desk. She drew out a package of MS. and read it over
-twice, then determined to have a flirtation with the magazines. These
-verses were more skillful from a literary point of view than any of her
-previous work, because, for the sake of variety, she had plagiarized
-some good work of an English poet. The story was a charming one,
-dramatic, somewhat fragmentary, and a trifle less caloric than her other
-effusions. She revised it carefully, and mailed it, later in the day, to
-one of the leading New York magazines.
-
-Two weeks passed and no answer came. Then, snatching at anything which
-offered its minimum of distraction, she determined to call on the
-editor. She had never presented herself to an editor before, fearing his
-betrayal of her identity; so well had she managed that not even Bessie
-knew she wrote; but she regarded the magazine editor from afar as an
-exalted being, and was willing to put her trust in him. She felt shy
-about acknowledging herself the apostle of beauty and the priestess of
-passion, but ennui conquered diffidence, and one morning she presented
-herself at the door of her editor’s den.
-
-The editor, who was glancing over proofs, raised his eyes as she
-entered, and did not look overjoyed to see her. Nevertheless, he
-politely asked her to be seated. Poor Hermia by this time was cold with
-fright; her knees were shaking. She was used to self-control, however,
-and in a moment managed to remark that she had come to inquire about the
-fate of her poem. The editor bowed, extracted a MS. from a pigeon-hole
-behind him, and handed it to her.
-
-“I cannot use it,” he said, “but I am greatly obliged to you,
-nevertheless. We are always grateful for contributions.”
-
-He had a pleasant way of looking upon the matter as settled, but an
-ounce or two of Hermia’s courage had returned, and she was determined to
-get something more out of the interview than a glimpse of an editor.
-
-“I am sorry,” she said, “but of course I expected it. Would you mind
-telling me what is the matter with it?”
-
-Editors will not take the trouble to write a criticism of a returned
-manuscript, but they are more willing to air their views verbally than
-people imagine. It gives them an opportunity to lecture and generalize,
-and they enjoy doing both.
-
-“Certainly not,” said the editor in question. “Your principal fault is
-that you are too highly emotional. Your verses would be unhealthy
-reading for my patrons. This is a family magazine, and has always borne
-the reputation of incorruptible morality. It would not do for us to
-print matter which a father might not wish his daughter to read. The
-American young girl should be the conscientious American editor’s first
-consideration.”
-
-This interview was among the anguished memories of Hermia’s life. After
-her return home she thought of so many good things she might have said.
-This was one which she uttered in the seclusion of her bed-chamber that
-evening:
-
-(“You are perfectly right,” with imperturbability. “‘Protect the
-American young girl lest she protect not herself’ should be the motto
-and the mission of the American editor!”)
-
-When she was at one with the opportunity, she asked: “And my other
-faults?”
-
-“Your other faults?” replied the unconscious victim of lagging wit.
-“There is a strain of philosophy in your mind which unfits you for
-magazine work. A magazine should be light and not too original. People
-pick it up after the work of the day; they want to be amused and
-entertained, they do not want to think. Anything new, anything out of
-the beaten track, anything which does not suggest old and familiar
-favorites, anything which requires a mental effort to grasp, annoys them
-and affects the popularity of the magazine. Of course we like
-originality and imagination—do not misunderstand me; what we do not
-want is the complex, the radically original, or the deep. We have
-catered to a large circle of readers for a great many years; we know
-exactly what they want, and they know exactly what to expect. When they
-see the name of a new writer in our pages they feel sure that whatever
-may be the freshness and breeziness of the newcomer, he (or she) will
-not call upon them to witness the tunneling of unhewn rock—so to speak.
-Do you grasp my meaning?”
-
-(Hermia at home in her bed-chamber: “I see. Your distinctions are
-admirable. You want originality with the sting extracted, soup instead
-of blood, an exquisite etching rather than the bold sweep and color of
-brush and oils. Your contributors must say an old thing in a new way, or
-a new thing in so old a way that the shock will be broken, that the
-reader will never know he has harbored a new-born babe. Your little
-lecture has been of infinite value to me. I shall ponder over it until I
-evolve something worthy of the wary parent and the American Young
-Girl.”)
-
-Hermia in the editor’s den: “Oh, yes; thank you very much. But I am
-afraid I shall never do anything you will care for. Good-morning.”
-
-The next day she sent the manuscript to another magazine, and, before
-she could reasonably expect a reply, again invaded the sanctity of
-editorial seclusion. The genus editor amused her; she resolved to keep
-her courage by the throat and study the arbiters of literary destinies.
-It is probable that, if her second editor had not been young and very
-gracious, her courage would again have flown off on deriding wings; as
-it was, it did not even threaten desertion.
-
-She found the editor engaged in nothing more depressing than the perusal
-of a letter. He smiled most promisingly when she announced herself as
-the mysterious “Quirus,” but folded his hands deprecatingly.
-
-“I am sorry I cannot use that poem,” he said, “but I am afraid it is
-impossible. It has decided merit, and, in view of the awful stuff we are
-obliged to publish, it would be a welcome addition to our pages. I don’t
-mind the strength of the poem or the plot; you have made your meaning
-artistically obscure. But there is one word in it which would make it
-too strong meat for the readers of this magazine. I refer to the word
-‘naked.’ It is quite true that the adjective ‘naked’ is used in
-conjunction with the noun ‘skies;’ but the word itself is highly
-objectionable. I have been trying to find a way out of the difficulty. I
-substituted the word ‘nude,’ but that spoils the meter, you see. Then I
-sought the dictionary.” He opened a dictionary that stood on a revolving
-stand beside him, and read aloud: “‘Naked—uncovered; unclothed; nude;
-bare; open; defenseless; plain; mere.’ None of these will answer the
-purpose, you see. They are either too short or too long; and ‘open’ does
-not convey the idea. I am really afraid that nothing can be done.
-Suppose you try something else and be more careful with your vocabulary.
-I trust you catch my idea, because I am really quite interested in your
-work. It is like the fresh breeze of spring when it is not”—here he
-laughed—“the torrid breath of the simoon. I have read some of your
-other verse, you see.”
-
-“I think I understand you,” said Hermia, leaning forward and gazing
-reflectively at him. “Manner is everything. Matter is a creature whose
-limbs may be of wood, whose joints may be sapless; so long as he is
-covered by a first-class tailor he is a being to strut proudly down to
-posterity. Or, for the sake of variety, which has its value, the
-creature may change his sex and become a pink-cheeked, flax-haired,
-blue-eyed doll. Hang upon her garments cut by an unconventional hand,
-looped eccentrically and draped artistically, and the poor little doll
-knows not herself from her clothes. Have I gazed understandingly upon
-the works of the literary clock?”
-
-The editor threw back his head and laughed aloud. “You are very clever,”
-he exclaimed, “but I am afraid your estimate of us is as correct as it
-is flattering. We are a set of cowards, but we should be bankrupt if we
-were not.”
-
-Hermia took the manuscript he had extracted from a drawer, and rose. “At
-all events you were charitable to read my verses,” she said, “and more
-than good to attempt their re-form.”
-
-The editor stood up also. “Oh, do not mention it,” he said, “and write
-me something else—something equally impassioned but quite
-irreproachable. Aside from the defect I mentioned, there were one or two
-verses which I should have been obliged to omit.”
-
-Hermia shrugged her shoulders. She might repeatedly work the lovers up
-to the verge of disaster, then, just before the fatal moment, wrench
-them apart and substitute asterisks for curses. The school-girls would
-palpitate, the old maids thrill, the married women smile, and the men
-grin. No harm would be done, maidens and maids would lay it down with a
-long-drawn sigh—of relief?—or regret?
-
-Hermia kept these reflections to herself and departed, thinking her
-editor a charming man.
-
-When she reached the sidewalk she stood irresolute for a moment, then
-walked rapidly for many blocks. The Mecca of her pilgrimage was another
-publishing-house. She stepped briskly upstairs and asked for the editor
-with a confidence born of excitement and encouragement. After a short
-delay she was shown into his office, and began the attack without
-preliminary.
-
-“I have brought you some verses,” she said, “which have been declined by
-two of your esteemed contemporaries on the ground of
-unconventionality—of being too highly seasoned for the gentle palates
-to which they cater. I bring them to you because I believe you have more
-courage than the majority of your tribe. You wrote two books in which
-you broke out wildly once or twice. Now I want you to read this while I
-am here. It will take but a few moments.”
-
-The editor, who had a highly non-committal air, smiled slightly, and
-held out his hand for the verses. He read them through, then looked up.
-
-“I rather like them,” he said. “They have a certain virility, although I
-do not mistake the strength of passion for creative force. But they are
-pretty tropical, and the versification is crude. I—am
-afraid—they—will hardly—do.”
-
-He looked out of the window, then smiled outright. It rather pleased him
-to dare that before which his brethren faltered. He made a number of
-marks on the manuscript.
-
-“That rectifies the crudeness a little,” he said, “and the poem
-certainly has intellectuality and merit. You can leave it. I will let
-you know in a day or two. Your address is on the copy, I suppose. I
-think you may count upon the availability of your verses.”
-
-Hermia accepted her dismissal and went home much elated. The verses were
-printed in the next issue of the magazine, and there was a mild storm on
-the literary lake. The course of the magazine, in sending up a stream of
-red-hot lava in place of the usual shower-bath of lemonade and
-claret-cup, was severely criticised, but there were those who said that
-this deliberately audacious editor enjoyed the little cyclone he had
-provoked.
-
-This was the most exciting episode Hermia could recall since Bessie’s
-marriage.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER V.
-
-
- THE SWEETS OF SOLITUDE.
-
-A few weeks later Frank made an announcement which gave Hermia a genuine
-thrill of delight. A fellow bank-clerk was obliged to spend some months
-in California, and had offered Mordaunt his house in Jersey for the
-summer. Hermia would not consent to go with them, in spite of their
-entreaties. As far back as she could remember, way down through the long
-perspective of her childhood, she had never been quite alone except at
-night, nor could she remember the time when she had not longed for
-solitude. And now! To be alone for four months! No more evenings of
-domestic bliss, no more piles of stockings to darn, no more dinners to
-concoct, no more discussions upon economy, no more daily tasks carefully
-planned by Bessie’s methodical mind, no more lessons to teach, no more
-_anything_ which had been her daily portion for the last thirteen years.
-Bridget would go with the family. She would do her own cooking, and not
-eat at all if she did not wish. Her clothes could fall into rags, and
-her hands look through every finger of her gloves. She would read and
-dream and forget that the material world existed.
-
-It was a beautiful spring morning when Hermia found herself alone. She
-had gone with the family to Jersey, and had remained until they were
-settled. Now the world was her own. When she returned to the flat, she
-threw her things on the floor, pushed the parlor furniture awry, turned
-the framed photographs to the wall, and hid the worsted tidies under the
-sofa.
-
-For two months she was well content. She reveled in her loneliness, in
-the voiceless rooms, the deserted table, the aimless hours, the
-forgotten past, the will-painted present. She regarded the post-man as
-her natural enemy, and gave him orders not to ring her bell. Once a week
-she took her letters from the box and devoted a half-hour to
-correspondence. She had a hammock swung in one of the rooms, and dreamed
-half the night through that she was in the hanging gardens of Semiramis.
-The darkness alone was between her and the heavens thick with starry
-gods; and below was the heavy perfume of oranges and lotus flowers.
-There was music—soft—crashing—wooing her to a scene of bewildering
-light and mad carousal. There was rapture of power and ecstasy of love.
-She had but to fling aside the curtains—to fly down the corridor—
-
-It is not to be supposed that Hermia’s imagination was faithful to the
-Orient. Her nature had great sensuous breadth and wells of passion which
-penetrated far down into the deep, hard substratum of New England rock;
-but her dreams were apt to be inspired by what she had read last. She
-loved the barbarous, sensuous, Oriental past, but she equally loved the
-lore which told of the rugged strength and brutal sincerity of mediæval
-days, when man turned his thoughts to love and war and naught besides;
-when the strongest won the woman he wanted by murder and force, and the
-woman loved him the better for doing it. Hermia would have gloried in
-the breathless uncertainty of those days, when death and love went
-hand-in-hand, and every kiss was bought with the swing of a battle-axe.
-She would have liked to be locked in her tower by her feudal father, and
-to have thrown down a rope-ladder to her lover at night. Other periods
-of history at times demanded her, and she had a great many famous
-lovers: Bolingbroke and Mirabeau, Napoleon and Aaron Burr, Skobeleff and
-Cavour, a motley throng who bore a strong racial resemblance to one
-another when roasting in the furnace of her super-heated imagination.
-
-Again, there were times when love played but a small part in her
-visions. She was one of the queens of that world to which she had been
-born, a world whose mountains were of cold brown stone, and in whose few
-and narrow currents drifted stately maidens in stiff, white collars and
-tailor-made gowns. She should be one of that select band. It was her
-birthright; and each instinct of power and fastidiousness, caste and
-exclusiveness, flourished as greenly within her as if those currents had
-swept their roots during every year of her life’s twenty-four. When
-ambition sank down, gasping for breath, love would come forward eager
-and warm, a halo enveloped the brown-stone front, and through the
-plate-glass and silken curtains shone the sun of paradise.
-
-For a few weeks the charm of solitude retained its edge. Then,
-gradually, the restlessness of Hermia’s nature awoke after its sleep and
-clamored for recognition. She grew to hate the monotony of her own
-society as she had that of her little circle. She came to dread the
-silence of the house; it seemed to close down upon her, oppressing,
-stifling, until she would put her hand to her throat and gasp for
-breath. Sometimes she would scream at every noise; her nerves became so
-unstrung that sleep was a visitor who rarely remembered her. Once,
-thinking she needed change of scene, she went to Jersey. She returned
-the next morning. The interruption of the habit of years, the absolute
-change of the past few months made it impossible to take up again the
-strings of her old life. They had snapped forever, and the tension had
-been too tight to permit a knot. She could go down to the river, but not
-back to the existence of the past thirteen years.
-
-For a week after her return from Jersey she felt as if she were going
-mad. Life seemed to have stopped; the future was a blank sheet. Try to
-write on it as she would, the characters took neither form nor color. To
-go and live alone would mean no more than the change from her sister’s
-flat to a bare-walled room; to remain in her present conditions was
-unthinkable. She had neither the money nor the beauty to accumulate
-interests in life. Books ceased to interest her, imagination failed her.
-She tried to write, but passion was dead, and the blood throbbed in her
-head and drowned words and ideas. She had come to the edge of life, and
-at her feet swept the river—in its depths were peace and
-oblivion—eternal rest—a long, cool night—the things which crawl in
-the deep would suck the blood from her head—a claw with muscles of
-steel would wrench the brain from her skull and carry it far, far, where
-she could feel it throb and jump and ache no more—
-
-And then, one day, John Suydam died and left her a million dollars.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER VI.
-
-
- SUYDAM’S LEGACY AND HERMIA’S WILL.
-
-Hermia attended her uncle’s funeral because Frank came over and insisted
-upon it; and she and her brother-in-law were the only mourners. But few
-people were in the church, a circumstance which Hermia remembered later
-with gratitude. The Suydams had lived on Second Avenue since Second
-Avenue had boasted a brick or brownstone front, but no one cared to
-assume a respect he did not feel. Among the tablets which graced the
-interior of St. Mark’s was one erected to the dead man’s father, who had
-left many shekels to the diocese; but John Suydam was lowered into the
-family vault with nothing to perpetuate his memory but his name and the
-dates of his birth and death engraved on the silver plate of his coffin.
-
-Hermia took no interest in her uncle’s death; she was even past the
-regret that she would be the poorer by twenty-five dollars a year. When
-she received the letter from Suydam’s lawyer, informing her that she was
-heiress to a million dollars, her hands shook for an hour.
-
-At first she was too excited to think connectedly. She went out and took
-a long walk, and physical fatigue conquered her nerves. She returned
-home and sat down on the edge of her bed and thought it all out. The
-world was under her feet at last. With such a fortune she could
-materialize every dream of her life. She would claim her place in
-society here, then go abroad, and in the old world forget the Nineteenth
-Century. She would have a house, each of whose rooms should be the
-embodiment of one of that strange medley of castles she had built in the
-land of her dreams. And men would love her—she was free to love in fact
-instead of in fancy—free to go forth and in the crowded drawing-rooms
-of that world not a bird’s flight away find the lover whose glance would
-be recognition.
-
-She sprang to her feet and threw her arms above her head. New life
-seemed to have been poured into her veins, and it coursed through them
-like quicksilver; she felt _young_ for the first time in the twenty-four
-centuries of her life. She dropped her arms and closed her hand slowly;
-the world was in the palm. She smiled and let her head drop back. She
-moved it slowly on the pivot of her throat. Her eyes met the glass.
-
-The cry of horror which burst from her lips rang through the room. For
-this girl had lived so long and so consistently in her imagination that
-it was rarely she remembered she was not a beautiful woman. During the
-past hours she had slowly grasped the fact that, as with the stroke of a
-magician’s wand, her dream-estates had been hardened from shadow into
-substance; it had not occurred to her that the gift most coveted was the
-one gift withheld.
-
-She sank in a heap on the bed, all spirit and hope gone out of her. For
-many minutes she remained motionless. Then she slowly straightened
-herself until she was erect once more, and in her face grew a look of
-hope fighting down doubt. In a moment hope triumphed, then gave way to
-determination, which in turn yielded to defiance. She sprang forward and
-with her clenched hand shattered her mirror into a star with a thousand
-points.
-
-“I _will_ be beautiful!” she cried aloud, “and I will never look into a
-glass again until I am.”
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER VII.
-
-
- A HEROINE IN TRAINING.
-
-The thirty or forty thousand dollars over John Suydam’s million had been
-left to Bessie. She immediately bought a charming house on St. Mark’s
-Avenue—it did not occur to her to leave her beloved Brooklyn—and
-Hermia furnished it for her and told her that she would educate the
-children. Hermia did not divide her fortune with her sister. She kept
-her hundred thousands, not because gold had made her niggardly, but
-because she wanted the power that a fortune gives.
-
-The old Suydam house was one of the largest of its kind in New York.
-Exteriorly it was of red brick with brown-stone trimmings, and about the
-lower window was a heavy iron balcony. Beneath the window was a square
-of lawn the size of a small kitchen table, which was carefully protected
-by a high, spiked iron railing.
-
-Hermia put the house at once in the hands of a famous designer and
-decorator, but allowed him no license. Her orders were to be followed to
-the letter. The large, single drawing-room was to be Babylonian. The
-library just behind, and the dining-room in the extension were to look
-like the rooms of a feudal castle. The large hall should suggest a
-cathedral. Above, her boudoir and bed-room was to be a scene from the
-Arabian Nights. A conservatory, to be built at the back of the house,
-would be a jungle of India.
-
-The house was to be as nearly finished as possible by the beginning of
-winter. She wrote to her mother’s sister, Miss Huldah Starbruck, a lady
-who had passed fifty peaceful years in Nantucket, and asked her to come
-and live with her. Miss Starbruck promised to come early in December,
-and then, all other points settled, Hermia gave her attention to the
-momentous question of her undeveloped beauty.
-
-She went to a fashionable physician and had a long interview with him.
-The next day he sent her a trained and athletic nurse, a pleasant,
-placid-looking young woman, named Mary Newton. Miss Newton, who had
-received orders to put Hermia into a perfect state of health, and who
-was given carte blanche, telegraphed for a cottage on the south shore of
-Long Island. She had a room fitted up as a gymnasium, and for the next
-four months Hermia obeyed her lightest mandate upon all questions of
-diet and exercise. Once a week Hermia went to town and divided the day
-between the house-decorators and a hairdresser who had engaged to
-develop the color in her lusterless locks.
-
-On the first of December, Miss Newton told her that no girl had ever
-been in more superb condition; and Hermia, who had kept her vow and not
-yet looked in a mirror, was content to take her word, and both returned
-to town.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER VIII.
-
-
- HERMIA DISCOVERS HERSELF.
-
-Had Hermia been a bride on her wedding-night she could not have felt
-more trepidation than when she stood on the threshold of her first
-interview with her new self. She was to meet a strange, potent being,
-who would unlock for her those doors against which, with fierce, futile
-longing, she had been wont to cast herself, since woman’s instinct had
-burst its germ.
-
-She entered her bedroom and locked the door. But she did not go to the
-mirror at once; she was loath to relinquish pleasurable uncertainty. She
-sank on a rug before the hearth and locked her hands about her knee in
-the attitude which had been a habit from childhood. For a few moments
-she sat enjoying the beauty of the room, the successful embodiment of
-one of her dearest dreams. The inlaid floor was thick with rugs that had
-been woven in the looms of the Orient. The walls were hung with cloth of
-gold, and the ceiling was a splendid picture of Nautch girls dancing in
-the pleasure palace of an Indian prince. The bed, enameled to represent
-ivory, stood on a dais over which trailed a wonderful Hindoo shawl. Over
-the couches and divans were flung rich stuffs, feathered rugs, and odd
-strips of Indian conceits. The sleeping-room was separated from the
-boudoir by a row of pillars, and from the unseen apartment came the
-smell of burning incense.
-
-Hermia leaned back against a pile of cushions, and, clasping her hands
-behind her head, gazed about her with half-closed eyes. There was a
-sense of familiarity about it all that cast a shadow over her content.
-It was a remarkably close reproduction of an ideal, considering that the
-ideal had been filtered through the practical brain of a nineteenth
-century decorator—but therein lay the sting. She had dreamed of this
-room, lived in it; it was as familiar as Bessie’s parlor in Brooklyn,
-with its tidies and what-nots; it wanted the charm of novelty. She had a
-protesting sense of being defrauded; it was all very well to realize
-one’s imaginings, but how much sweeter if some foreign hand had
-cunningly woven details within and glamour above, of which she had never
-dreamed. The supreme delight of atmospheric architecture is the vague,
-abiding sense that high on the pinnacle we have reared, and which has
-shot above vision’s range, is a luminous apex, divine in color, wondrous
-in form, a will-o’-the-wisp fluttering in the clouds of imagination.
-
-Hermia sighed, but shrugged her shoulders. Had not life taught her
-philosophy?
-
-Where the gold-stuffs parted on the wall opposite the pillars, a mirror,
-ivory-framed, reached from floor to ceiling. Hermia rose and walked a
-few steps toward the glass without daring to raise her eyes. Then with a
-little cry she ran to the lamps and turned them out. She flung off her
-clothes, threw the lace thing she called her night-gown over her head,
-and jumped into bed. She pulled the covers over her face, and for ten
-minutes lay and reviled herself. Then, with an impatient and audible
-exclamation at her cowardice, she got up and lit every lamp in the room.
-
-She walked over to the mirror and looked long at herself, fearfully at
-first, then gravely, at last smilingly. She was beautiful, because she
-was unique. Her victory was the more assured because her beauty would be
-the subject of many a dispute. She had not the delicate features and
-conventional coloring that women admire, but a certain stormy, reckless
-originality which would appeal swiftly and directly to variety-loving
-man. Her eyes, clear and brilliant as they had once been dull and cold,
-were deep and green as the sea. Her hair, which lay in a wiry cloud
-about her head and swept her brows, was a shining mass of brazen
-threads. Her complexion had acquired the clear tint of ivory and was
-stained with the rich hue of health. The very expression of her face had
-changed; the hard, dogged, indifferent look had fled. With hope and
-health and wishes gratified had come the lifting and banishment of the
-old mask—that crystallization of her spirit’s discontent. Yes, she was
-a beautiful woman. She might not have a correct profile or a soft
-roundness of face, but she was a beautiful woman.
-
-She pinched her cheek; it was firm and elastic. She put her hands about
-her throat; it rose from its lace nest, round and polished as an ivory
-pillar. She slipped the night-gown from her shoulders; the line of the
-back of her head and neck was beautiful to see, and a crisp, waved
-strand of shorter hair that had fallen from its place looked like a
-piece of gold filigree on an Indian vase. Her shoulders did not slope,
-but they might have been covered with thickest satin. She raised one arm
-and curved it slowly, then let it hang straight at her side. She must
-always have had a well-shaped arm, for it tapered from shoulder to
-wrist; but health and care alone could give the transparent brilliancy
-and flawless surface.
-
-Hermia gazed long at herself. She swayed her beautiful body until it
-looked like a reed in an Indian swamp, blown by a midnight breeze. It
-was as lithe and limber as young bamboo. She drew the pins from her
-hair. It fell about her like a million infinitesimal tongues of living
-flame, and through them her green eyes shone and her white skin gleamed.
-
-Tossing her hair back she sprang forward and kissed her reflection in
-the glass, a long, greeting, grateful kiss, and her eyes blazed with
-passionate rapture. Then she slowly raised her arms above her head,
-every pulse throbbing with delicious exultation, every nerve leaping
-with triumph and hope, every artery a river of tumultuous, victorious,
-springing life.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER IX.
-
-
- HELEN SIMMS.
-
-A year later Hermia was sitting by her library fire one afternoon when
-the butler threw back the tapestry that hung over the door and announced
-Helen Simms. Hermia rose to greet her visitor with an exclamation of
-pleasure that had in it an accent of relief. She had adopted Helen Simms
-as the friend of her new self; as yet, but one knew the old Hermia.
-Helen was so essentially modern and practical that restless longings and
-romantic imaginings fled at her approach.
-
-Miss Simms, as she entered the room, her cheeks flushed by the wind, and
-a snow-flake on her turban, was a charming specimen of her kind. She had
-a tall, trim, slender figure, clad in sleek cloth, and carried with
-soldierly uprightness. Her small head was loftily and unaffectedly
-poised, her brown hair was drawn up under her quiet little hat with
-smoothness and precision, and a light, severe fluff adorned her
-forehead. She had no beauty, but she had the clean, clear, smooth,
-red-and-ivory complexion of the New York girl, and her teeth were
-perfect. She looked like a thoroughbred, splendidly-groomed young
-greyhound, and was a glowing sample of the virtues of exercise,
-luxurious living, and the refinement of two or three generations.
-
-“What do you mean by moping here all by yourself?” she exclaimed, with a
-swift smile which gave a momentary flash of teeth. “You were to have met
-me at Madame Lefarge’s, to have tried on your new gown. I waited for you
-a half-hour, and in a beastly cold room at that.”
-
-“I beg your pardon,” replied Hermia, with sudden contrition, “but I
-forgot all about it—I may as well tell the bald truth. But I am glad to
-see you. I am blue.”
-
-Helen took an upright chair opposite Hermia’s, and lightly leaned upon
-her umbrella as if it were a staff. “I should think you would be blue in
-this ‘gray ancestral room,’” she said. “It looks as if unnumbered state
-conspiracies and intrigues against unhappy Duncans had been concocted in
-it. I do not deny that it is all very charming, but I never come into it
-without a shiver and a side-glance at the dark corners.”
-
-She looked about her with a smile which had little fear in it.
-
-“These stern gray walls and that vaulted ceiling carry you out of Second
-Avenue, I admit; and those stained-glass windows and all that tapestry
-and antique furniture waft me back to the days of my struggles with
-somebody or other’s history of England. But, _Hermia mia_, I think it
-would be good for you to have a modern drawing-room in your house, and
-to sit in it occasionally. It is this semblance of past romance which
-makes you discontented with the world as you find it.”
-
-Hermia gave a sigh. “I know,” she said, “but I can’t help it. I am tired
-of everything. I dread the thought of another winter exactly like last.
-The same men, same receptions, same compliments, same everything.”
-
-“My dear, you are blasé. I have been expecting it. It follows on the
-heels of the first season, as delicate eyes follow scarlet fever. The
-eyes get well, and so will you. Five years from now you will not be as
-blasé as you are this moment. Look at me. I have been out four years. I
-was blasé three years ago, but to-day I could not live without society
-and its thousand little excitements. See what you have to look forward
-to!”
-
-Hermia smiled. “You certainly are a shining example of patience and
-fortitude, but I fear you have something in you which I lack. I shall
-grow more and more bored and discontented. Three years of this would
-kill me. I wish I could go to Europe, but Aunt Frances cannot go yet,
-and I don’t care to go alone the first time, for I want to see the
-society of the different capitals. After that I shall go to Europe by
-myself. But in the mean time what am I to do?”
-
-“Have a desperate flirtation; I mean, of course, a prolonged one. Heaven
-knows you are the most fearful flirt in New York—while it lasts. Only
-it never lasts more than a week and a day.”
-
-“I am not a flirt,” said Hermia. “I have not the first essential of a
-flirt—patience. I have been simply trying with all my might to fall in
-love. And I cannot have a prolonged flirtation with a man who
-disappoints me.”
-
-“My dear, as a veteran, let me advise you. So long as you keep up this
-hunt for the ideal you will be bored by everything and everybody in
-actual life. All this sentiment and romance and imagination of yours are
-very charming, and when I recall the occasions wherein you have kept me
-awake until two in the morning, I forgive you, because I found you quite
-as entertaining as a novel. But it is only spoiling you for the real
-pleasures of life. You must be more philosophical. If you can’t find
-your ideal, make up your mind to be satisfied with the best you can get.
-There are dozens of charming men in New York, and you meet them every
-week. They may not be romantic, they may look better in evening clothes
-than in a tin hat and leather legs, but they are quite too fascinating
-for all that. Just put your imagination to some practical use, and fancy
-yourself in love with one of them for a month. After that it will be
-quite easy.”
-
-“I can’t!” exclaimed Hermia emphatically, as she turned to pour out the
-tea the butler had brought in. “I get everything they know out of them
-in three interviews, and then we’ve nothing left to talk about.”
-
-Helen removed her glove from her white hand with its flashing rings,
-and, changing her seat to one nearer the table, took up a thin slice of
-bread-and-butter. “Is it five o’clock already?” she said, “I must run. I
-have a dinner to-night, the opera, and two balls.” She nibbled her bread
-and sipped her tea as if the resolution to run had satisfied her
-conscience. “Shall I have the pleasure of seeing you have twice as many
-partners as myself?”
-
-“No; I am not going out to-night. You know I draw the line at three
-times a week, and I have already touched the limit.”
-
-“Quite right. You will be beautiful as long as you live. Between Miss
-Newton, three nights’ sleep a week, and a large waist, you will be
-quoted to your grandchildren as a nineteenth-century Ninon de l’Enclos.
-But, to return to the truffles we were discussing before the tea came
-in—another trouble is that you are too appallingly clever for the
-‘infants.’ Why do you not go into the literary set and find an author?
-All I have ever known are fearful bores, but they might suit you.” She
-put down her tea-cup. “I have it!” she exclaimed; “Ogden Cryder has just
-come back from Europe, and I am positive that he is the man you have
-been waiting for. You must meet him. I met him two or three years ago,
-and really, for a literary man, he was quite charming. Awfully
-good-looking, too.”
-
-“He is one of the dialect fiends, is he not?” asked Hermia, languidly.
-“It is rather awkward meeting an author whose books you haven’t read,
-and I simply cannot read dialect.”
-
-“Oh! get one or two and skim them. The thread of the story is all you
-want; then you can discuss the heroine with him, and insist that she
-ought to have done the thing he did not make her do. That will flatter
-him and give you a subject to start off with. An author scares me to
-death, and, upon the rare occasions when I meet one, I always fly at him
-with some reproach about the cruel way in which he treated the heroine,
-or ask him breathlessly to _please_ tell me whether she and the hero are
-ever going to get out of their difficulties or are to remain _planté là_
-for the rest of their lives. This works off the embarrassment, you see,
-and after that we talk about Mrs. Blank’s best young man.”
-
-Hermia smiled. It was difficult to imagine Miss Simms frightened,
-breathless, or embarrassed. She looked as if emotion had not stirred her
-since the days when she had shrieked in baby wrath because she could not
-get her chubby toes into her toothless mouth.
-
-“Ogden Cryder might at least have something to talk about,” Hermia
-answered. “Perhaps it would be worth while.”
-
-“It would, my dear. I am convinced that he is the man, and I know where
-you can meet him. Papa has tickets for the next meeting of the Club of
-Free Discussion, and I will tell him to take you. He knows Mr. Cryder,
-and shall have strict orders to introduce you. What is more, you will
-have the pleasure of hearing the lion roar for an hour before you meet
-him. He is to give the lecture of the evening.”
-
-“Well,” said Hermia, “I shall be glad to go, if your father will be good
-enough to take me. Which of Cryder’s books shall I read up?”
-
-“‘Cornfield Yarns’ and ‘How Uncle Zebediah sowed dat Cotton Field’ are
-the ones everybody talks about most. Some of the yarns are quite sweet,
-and the papers say—I always read the criticisms, they give the outline
-of the plot, and it saves an awful lot of trouble—that Uncle Zebediah
-is the most superb African of modern fiction. Uncle Tom has hidden his
-diminished head. ‘Unc. Zeb.,’ as he is familiarly called, rolls forth an
-amount of dialect to the square inch which none but a Cryder could
-manipulate. It is awful work pulling through it, but we all have to work
-for success in this life.”
-
-She drew on her long, loose, tan-colored glove, pushed her bangles over
-it, then carefully tucked the top under her cuff. “Well, _addio, Hermia
-mia_,” she said, rising; “I will send you a note to-morrow morning and
-let you know if anything can possibly happen to prevent papa going on
-Wednesday evening. In the mean time, make up your mind to be vanquished
-by Ogden Cryder. He really is enchanting.”
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER X.
-
-
- A MENTAL PHOTOGRAPH GALLERY.
-
-After Helen left, Hermia went up to her room. There she did what she
-never failed to do the moment she entered her bedroom—walked over to
-the glass and looked at herself. She had not even yet got used to the
-idea of her beauty, and sometimes approached the mirror with dread lest
-her new self should prove a dream. She saw nothing to alarm her. A
-year’s dissipation had not impaired her looks. Excitement and good
-living agreed with her, and Miss Newton tyrannized over her like the
-hygienic duenna that she was.
-
-She sank down on the floor before the long glass, resting her elbow on a
-cushion. Her crouching attitude reminded her of the women whose lines
-had fallen in days of barbaric splendor. It is not to be supposed for a
-moment that this effect was accidental. Hermia had determined, before
-she burst upon New York, that her peculiar individuality should be the
-suggestion of the untrammeled barbarian held in straining leash by the
-requirements of civilization. Her green eyes and tawny hair were the
-first requisites, and she managed her pliant body with a lithe grace
-which completed the semblance.
-
-She wore to-day a tea-gown of Louis XIV. brocade and lace, and she
-watched herself with an amused smile. A year and a half ago her wardrobe
-had consisted of coarse serges and gingham aprons.
-
-She put her head on the cushion, nestled her body into the feather rug,
-and in a vague, indolent way let her memory rove through the little
-photograph gallery in her brain set apart for the accumulations of the
-past twelve months. There were a great many photographs in that gallery,
-and their shapes and dimensions were as diverse as their subjects. Some
-were so large that they swept from floor to ceiling, although their
-surface might reflect but one impression; others were too small to catch
-the eye of the casual observer, and the imprint on them was like one
-touch of a water-colorist’s brush. Many pasteboards of medium size were
-there whose surfaces were crowded like an ant-hill at sundown; and
-pushed into corners or lying under a dust-heap were negatives,
-undeveloped and fading. At one end of the gallery was a great square
-plate, and on it there was no impression of any sort, nor ever had been.
-
-Hermia pushed up her loose sleeve and pressed her face into the warm
-bend of her arm. On the whole, the past year had been almost
-satisfactory. A clever brain, an iron will, and a million dollars can do
-much, and that much Hermia’s combined gifts had accomplished.
-
-She opened the windows of her photograph gallery and dusted out the
-cobwebs, then, beginning at the top, sauntered slowly down. She looked
-at her first appearance in the world of fashion. It is after the
-completion of her winter’s wardrobe by a bevy of famous tailors, and she
-wears a gown of light-gray cloth and a tiny bonnet of silvery birds. The
-début is in St. Mark’s; and as she walks up the center aisle to the
-Suydam pew, her form as straight as a young sapling, her head haughtily
-yet nonchalantly poised, every curve of her glove-fitting gown
-proclaiming the hand that cut it, Second Avenue catches its breath,
-raises its eyebrows, and exchanges glances of well-bred, aristocratic
-surprise. Late that week it calls, and this time is not repulsed, but
-goes away enchanted. It does not take long for the unseen town crier to
-flit from Second Avenue to Fifth, and one day his budget of news sends a
-ripple over the central stream. John Suydam’s heiress, a beautiful girl
-of twenty, with a style all her own, yet not violating a law of good
-form! The old red-brick house transformed into an enchanted palace, with
-a remarkably wide-awake princess, and a sacrifice to modern proprieties
-in the shape of a New England aunt! How unusual and romantic! yet all as
-it should be. We begin to remember poor Crosby Suydam and his charming
-young wife. We recall the magnificence of their entertainments in the
-house on lower Fifth Avenue—now resplendent with a milliner’s sign.
-Both dead? How sad! And to think that John Suydam had a million all the
-time! The old wretch! But how enchanting that he had the decency to
-leave it to this beautiful girl! We will call.
-
-They do call; and a distant relative of Hermia’s father, Mrs. Cotton
-Dykman, comes forward with stately tread and gracious welcome and offers
-her services as social sponsor. Hermia accepts the offer with gratitude,
-and places her brougham at Mrs. Dykman’s disposal.
-
-Mrs. Dykman is a widow approaching fifty, with lagging steps yet haughty
-mien. Her husband omitted to leave her more than a competence; but she
-lives in Washington Square in a house which was her husband’s
-grandfather’s, and holds her head so high and wears so much old lace and
-so many family diamonds (which she hid in the wall during the late
-Cotton’s lifetime) that the Four Hundred have long since got into the
-habit of forgetting her bank account. To her alone does Hermia confide
-the secret of her past external self and the methods of reconstruction,
-and Mrs. Dykman respects her ever after.
-
-In a photograph near the head of the gallery Hermia and Mrs. Dykman are
-seated by the library fire, and Hermia is discoursing upon a question
-which has given her a good deal of thought.
-
-“I want to be a New York society woman to my finger-tips,” she exclaims,
-sitting forward in her chair; “that is, I want to be _au fait_ in every
-particular. I would not for the world be looked upon as an alien; but at
-the same time I want to be a distinctive figure in it. I want to be
-aggressively _myself_. The New York girl is of so marked a type, Aunt
-Frances, that you would know one if you met her in a Greek bandit’s
-cave. She is unlike anything else on the face of the earth. You cross
-the river to Brooklyn, you travel an hour and a half to Philadelphia,
-you do not see a woman who faintly resembles her unless she has been
-imported direct. The New York girl was never included in the scheme of
-creation. When the combined forces of a new civilization and the
-seven-leagued stride of democracy made her a necessity, Nature fashioned
-a mold differing in shape and tint from all others in her storehouse,
-and cast her in it. It is locked up in a chest and kept for her
-exclusive use. The mold is made of ivory, and the shape is long and
-straight and exceeding slim. There is a slight roundness about the bust,
-and a general neatness and trimness which are independent of attire. And
-each looks carefully fed and thoroughly groomed. Each has brightness in
-her eye and elasticity in her step. And through the cheek of each the
-blood flows in exactly the same red current about a little white island.
-Now all this is very charming, but then she lacks—just a
-little—individuality. And I _must_ have my distinctive personality.
-There seems nothing left but to be eccentric. Tell me what line to
-take.”
-
-Mrs. Dykman, who has been listening with a slight frown on her brow and
-a smile on her lips, replies in her low, measured accents, which a
-cataclysm could not accelerate nor sharpen: “My dear, before I answer
-your amusing tirade, let me once more endeavor to impress you with the
-importance of repose. You may be as beautiful and as original as your
-brains and will can make you, but without repose of manner you will be
-like an unfinished impressionist daub. Few American women have it unless
-they have lived in England; but I want you to take coals to Newcastle
-when you make your début in London society.
-
-“In regard to the other question,” she continues, “experience and
-observation and thirty years of that treadmill we call society have
-taught me a good many things. One of these things is that eccentricity
-is the tacit acknowledgment of lack of individuality. A person with
-native originality does not feel the necessity of forcing it down
-people’s throats. The world finds it out soon enough, and likes it in
-spite of its own even pace and sharply defined creeds. That is, always
-provided the originality wears a certain conventional garb: if you would
-conquer the world, you must blind and humor it by donning its own
-portable envelope. Do you understand what I mean, my dear? You must not
-startle people by doing eccentric things; you must not get the
-reputation of being a _poseuse_—it is vulgar and tiresome. You must
-simply be quietly different from everybody else. There is a fine but
-decided line, my dear girl, between eccentricity and individuality, and
-you must keep your lorgnette upon it. Otherwise, people will laugh at
-you, just as they will be afraid of you if they discover that you are
-clever. By the way, you must not forget that last point. The average
-American woman is shallow, with an appearance of cleverness. You must be
-clever, with an appearance of shallowness. To the ordinary observer the
-effect is precisely the same.”
-
-She rises to her feet and adjusts her bonnet. “It is growing late and I
-must go. Think over what I have said. You have individuality enough; you
-need not fear that people will fail to find it out; and you assuredly do
-not look like any one else in New York.”
-
-Hermia stands up and gives Mrs. Dykman’s tournure a little twist. “You
-are a jewel, Aunt Frances. What should I do without you?”
-
-Whereupon Mrs. Dykman looks pleased and goes home in Hermia’s brougham.
-
-Hermia is fairly launched in society about the first of January, and
-goes “everywhere” until the end of the season. It gets to be somewhat
-monotonous toward the end, but, on the whole, she rather likes it. She
-is what is called a success; that is to say, she becomes a professional
-beauty, and is much written about in the society papers. She receives a
-great many flowers, constant and assiduous attention at balls, and her
-dancing is much admired. She gets plenty of compliments, and is much
-stared upon at the opera and when driving in the park. Her reception
-days and evenings are always crowded, and her entertainments—supervised
-by Mrs. Dykman and a valuable young man named Richard Winston—are
-pronounced without flaw, and receive special mention in the dailies.
-
-And yet—Hermia rubbed her fingers thoughtfully up and down several of
-the pictures as if to make their figures clearer—in her heart she did
-not deem herself an unqualified success. Men ran after her—but because
-she was the fashion, not because they loved her.
-
-During that first winter and the ensuing season at Newport, she had a
-great many proposals, but with two or three exceptions she believed them
-to have been more or less interested. She did not seem to “take” with
-men. This had angered her somewhat; she had expected to conquer the
-world, and she did not like obstacles.
-
-She had an odd and voluptuous beauty, she had brain and all the
-advantages of unique and charming surroundings, and she flattered men
-when she remembered that it was the thing to do. Was it because the men
-felt rather than knew that they did not understand her? Or was it
-because she did not understand them? She was keenly aware of her lack of
-experience, and that her knowledge of men was chiefly derived from
-books. And wherein she was right and wherein wrong she could not tell.
-
-She shrugged her shoulders. “I suppose experience will come with time,”
-she thought, “and I certainly have not much to wish for—if—only—”
-
-She clasped her hands behind her head and turned her mental eyeglass
-upon the unused plate at the head of the gallery.
-
-When the news of her good fortune had come, her heart’s first leap had
-been toward the lover who awaited her in the world thrown at her feet.
-That lover, that hero of her dream-world, she had not found.
-Occasionally she had detected a minor characteristic in some man, and by
-it been momentarily attracted. In no case had the characteristic been
-supplemented by others; and after a long and eager search she had
-resigned herself to the painful probability that ideals belonged to the
-realm of the immaterial.
-
-But, if she had sighed farewell to the faithful and much-enduring hero
-of her years of adversity, she had by no means relinquished the idea of
-loving. Few women had ever tried more determinedly and more persistently
-to love, and few had met with less success. She had imagined that in a
-world of men a woman’s only problem must be whom to choose. It had not
-taken her a year to discover that it is easier to scratch the earth from
-its molten heart than to love.
-
-She sprang to her feet and walked up and down the room with swift,
-impatient steps. Was she never to be happy? never to know the delights
-of love, the warmth of a man’s caress, the sudden, tumultuous bursting
-from their underground fastness of the mighty forces within her? Was she
-to go through life without living her romance, without knowing the
-sweet, keen joy of hidden love? Would she end by marrying a club-room
-epigram flavored with absinthe, and settle down to a light or lurid
-variation on Bessie’s simple little theme? She laughed aloud. Perhaps it
-need not be stated that a year of fashionable life had increased her
-contempt for matrimony.
-
-Was Ogden Cryder the man? An author, yet a man of the world; a man of
-intellect, yet with fascination and experience of women. It sounded
-like! It sounded like! Oh! if he were! He might have flaws. He might be
-the polaric opposite of her ideal. Let him! If he had brain and passion,
-skill and sympathy, she would love him with every fiber of her being,
-and thank him on her knees for compelling her so to do.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XI.
-
-
- A TAILOR-MADE FATE.
-
-Helen Simms was a young woman who had cantered gracefully under the
-flick of society’s whip since the night of her début. Occasionally she
-broke into a trot, and anon into a run. The speedier locomotion took
-place on unworn by-paths; when on the broad highway she was a most
-sedate representative of her riding-school. At times she had been
-known—to a select few—to kick; and the kick had invariably occurred at
-the crossing of the highway and the by-path, and just before she had
-made up her mind to forsake the road for the hedges.
-
-She had all the virtues of her kind. On Sunday mornings she attended St.
-Thomas’s, and after service was over walked home with her favorite
-youth, whom she patronizingly spoke of as her “infant.” In the afternoon
-she entertained another “infant” or read a French novel. Nor was her
-life entirely given over to frivolity. She belonged to the sewing-class
-of her church, and like its other members fulfilled her mission as a
-quotable example, if she pricked her fingers seldom; and once a week she
-attended a Shakespeare “propounding.” She took a great deal of exercise,
-skimmed through all the light literature of the day, including the
-magazines, and even knew a little science, just enough to make the
-occasional clever man she met think her a prodigy as she smiled up into
-his face and murmured something about “the great body of force” or a
-late experiment in telepathy.
-
-She had a bright way of saying nothing, a cool, shrewd head, and an
-endless stock of small-talk. Both sexes approved of her as a clever,
-charming, well-regulated young woman—all of which she indisputably was.
-
-Enthusiasm had long since been drilled out of her, but she had for
-Hermia an attachment very sincere as far as it went—it may be added
-that, if there had been more of Miss Simms, there would have been more
-attachment. It is possible that Hermia, without her brilliant position,
-would not have attracted the attention of Miss Simms, but it is only
-just to Helen to say that the conditions affected her not a whit; she
-was quite free from snobbery.
-
-She liked Hermia because she could not understand her—much as she was
-influenced by the sea in a storm, or by mountains with lightning darting
-about their crests. Whenever she entered Hermia’s presence she always
-felt as if the air had become suddenly fresher; and she liked new
-sensations. She did not in the least resent the fact that she could not
-understand Hermia, that her chosen friend was intellectually a
-hemisphere beyond her, and in character infinitely more complex. She was
-pleased at her own good taste, and quite generous enough to admire where
-she could not emulate.
-
-She was constantly amused at Hermia’s abiding and aggressive desire to
-fall in love, but she was by no means unsympathetic. She would have
-regarded an emotional tumult in her own being as a bore, but for Hermia
-she thought it quite the most appropriate and advisable thing. Once in a
-while, in a half-blind way, she came into momentary contact with the
-supreme loneliness and craving of Hermia’s nature, and she invariably
-responded with a sympathetic throb and a wish that the coming man would
-not tarry so long.
-
-She was so glad she had thought of Cryder. She honestly believed him to
-be the one man of all men who could make the happiness of her friend;
-and she entered the ranks of the Fates with the pleasurable suspicion
-that she was the author of Hermia’s infinite good.
-
-She surprised her father, the morning after her last interview with
-Hermia, by coming down to breakfast. She was careful to let him finish
-his roll to the last crumb and to read his paper to the acrid end. Then
-she went over and put her finger-tips under his chin.
-
-He glanced up with a groan. “What do you want now?” he demanded, looking
-at her over his eye-glasses. His periodical pettings had made him
-cynical.
-
-“Nothing—for myself. Did you not say that some one had sent you tickets
-for the next meeting of the Free Discussion?”
-
-“Yes; but you can’t have them to give to some girl who would only go to
-show herself, or to some boy whose thimbleful of gray matter would be
-addled before the lecture was half over. I am going to hear that lecture
-myself.”
-
-“How perfectly enchanting! That is what I wished, yet dared not hope
-for. And you are not only going yourself, but you are going to take
-Hermia Suydam with you.”
-
-“Oh!” Mr. Simms raised his eyebrows. “I am? Very well. I am sure I have
-no objection. Miss Suydam is the finest girl in New York.”
-
-“Of course she is, and she will make a sensation at the club; you will
-be the envied of all men. And there is one thing else you are to do. As
-soon as the exercises are over I want you to present Ogden Cryder to
-her. I have particular reasons for wishing them to meet.”
-
-“What are the reasons?”
-
-“Never mind. You do as you are told, and ask no questions”—this in a
-tone which extracted the sting, and was supplemented by a light kiss on
-Mr. Simms’ smooth forehead.
-
-“Very well, very well,” said her father, obediently, “she shall meet
-him; remind me of it just before I leave. And now I must run. I have a
-case in court at ten o’clock.”
-
-He stood up and gave one of his handsome, iron-gray side-whiskers an
-absent caress. He was not a particularly good-looking man, but he had a
-keen, dark eye, and a square, heavy jaw, in both of which features lay
-the secret of his great success in his profession. He was devoted to
-Helen, and had allowed her, with only an occasional protest, to bring
-him up. He could be brusque and severe in court, but in Helen’s hands he
-was a wax ball into which she delighted to poke her dainty fingers.
-
-Helen wrote a note to Hermia, and he took it with him to send by an
-unwinged Mercury.
-
-On Friday morning Helen went over to Second Avenue to make sure that her
-friend had not changed her mind. She found Hermia in her boudoir, with
-one of Cryder’s books in her hand and another on a table beside her.
-
-“What do you think of him?” demanded Miss Simms, somewhat anxiously, as
-she adjusted her steel-bound self in a pile of cushions—straight-backed
-chairs in this room there were none.
-
-Hermia shrugged her shoulders: “A decorous seasoning of passion; a
-clear, delicate gravy of sentiment; a pinch of pathos; a garnish of
-analysis; and a solid roast of dialect. Woe is me!—I have read two
-whole volumes; and I pray that I may like the author better than his
-books. But he is clever; there is no denying that!”
-
-“Oh, horribly clever! What are you going to wear, to-night?”
-
-“That dark-green velvet I showed you the other day.”
-
-“Lovely! And it will match your eyes to a shade. You will look, as
-usual, as if you had just stepped out of an old picture. Mr. Cryder will
-put you in a book.”
-
-“If he does I shall be a modern picture, not an old one. That man could
-not write a tale of fifty years ago.”
-
-“So much the better for you! What you want is to fall in love with a
-modern man, and let him teach you that the mediæval was a great animal,
-who thought of nothing but what he ate and drank. I do not claim that
-the species is extinct; but, at least, in these days we have a choice.”
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XII.
-
-
- THE CLUB OF FREE DISCUSSION.
-
-Hermia looked at her reflection that evening with a smile. The shadowed
-emerald of her velvet gown made her hair glow like vibrant flame. The
-color wandered through her cheeks and emptied itself into her lips. Her
-eyes were as green as the limpid floor of ocean-hollowed caverns. Across
-her ivory-white shoulder swept a curving blue vein, thin as an infant’s
-lash, and on the rise of her right breast were three little moles, each
-marking the corner of a tiny triangle.
-
-Mr. Simms called for her promptly, and when they arrived at the
-club-rooms they strolled about looking at the pictures and the people
-until the exercises began. There were many literary and artistic
-celebrities present, all of whom looked much like ordinary and well-bred
-people; but to Hermia there was a luminous halo about each. It was her
-first experience in the literary world, and she felt as if she had
-entered the atmosphere of a dream. It was one of her few satisfactory
-experiments. She was much stared at; everybody knew her by reputation if
-not by sight; and a number of men asked to be presented.
-
-Among them was Mr. Overton, the editor who had published her poem in his
-magazine. She changed color as he came up, but his manner at once
-assured her that she was not recognized: he would have vindicated his
-fraternity, indeed, had he been keen-sighted enough to recognize in this
-triumphant, radiant creature the plain, ill-dressed, stooping girl with
-whom he had talked for half an hour at the close of a winter’s day two
-years before. Hermia, of course, no longer wrote; life offered her too
-many other distractions.
-
-Mr. Overton suggested that they should go into the lecture-room and
-secure good seats. He found them chairs and took one beside Hermia.
-
-“Ogden Cryder gives the address to-night,” he said, after he had
-satisfied Hermia’s curiosity in regard to the names of a half-dozen
-people. “Do you like his books?”
-
-“Fairly. Do you?”
-
-Mr. Overton laughed. “That is rather a direct question, considering that
-I print one of his stories about every six months.”
-
-“Oh, you might not like them. You might publish them out of tender
-regard for the demands of your readers.”
-
-Mr. Overton had a characteristic American face, thin, nervous, shrewd,
-pleasant. He gave Hermia a smile of unwonted frankness. “I will confide
-to you, Miss Suydam, that such is the case with about two-thirds I
-publish. I thank Heaven that I do not have to read a magazine as well as
-publish it. I have an associate editor who sits with his finger on the
-pulse of the public, and relieves me of much vexation of spirit.”
-
-“But tell me what you think of Mr. Cryder.”
-
-Mr. Overton raised his eyebrows. “He is indisputably the best dialect
-writer we have, and he is a charming exponent of surface passions.
-Whether he would drown if he plunged below the surface is a question; at
-all events he might become improper, and morality pays in this magazine
-era. There he is now; no doubt we shall have a delightful address.”
-
-Hermia turned her head quickly, but Cryder had taken a chair at the foot
-of the rostrum, and there were many heads between her own and his. A
-moment later, however, the president of the club made the preliminary
-remarks, and then gave place to Cryder.
-
-Hermia watched him breathlessly as he ascended the steps and stood
-beside the table, waiting for the hearty welcome to subside. Was it _he_
-at last? He was certainly good to look at; she had never seen more
-charming eyes—clear golden-hazel, half melancholy, wholly intelligent.
-His small, well-shaped head was thickly covered with short, soft,
-gold-brown hair; the delicate, aristocratic features were as finely cut
-as those on an intaglio; and the thin, curved lips were shaded by a
-small mustache. His figure, tall, light, graceful, had a certain
-vibrating activity even in repose. His hand was white and tapering as
-that of a woman, and his auditors were given opportunity to appreciate
-it.
-
-The subject of the lecture was “The Dialect Element in American
-Fiction,” and Mr. Cryder did it justice in a clear, ringing, musical
-voice. He very properly remarked that it was the proud boast of America
-that no other country, ancient or modern, could present such an array of
-famous dialects, consequently no other country had ever had such
-infinite variety in her literature. He would say nothing of the several
-hundred dialects as yet awaiting the Columbus-pen of genius; he would
-merely speak of those nine already discovered and immortalized—the
-Negro, the Yankee, the Southern, the Creole, the Tennessee Mountain, the
-Cow-boy, the Bret Harte Miner, the Hoosier, and the Chinese. Each of
-these, although springing from one bosom, namely, that of the Great
-American People, had as distinct an individuality as if the product of
-an isolated planet. Such a feature was unique in the history of any
-country or any time. The various _patois_ of the French, the
-provincialisms of the English, the barbarisms of the Scotch, the brogue
-of the Irish, were but so many bad and inconsequent variations upon an
-original theme. Reflect, therefore, upon the immense importance of
-photographing and preserving American neologies for the benefit of
-posterity! In the course of time would inevitably come the homogeneity
-of the human race; the negro, for instance, would pervade every corner
-of the civilized earth, and his identity become hopelessly entangled
-with that of his equally de-individualized blonde brother. His dialect
-would be a forgotten art! Contemporaries would have no knowledge of it
-save through the painstaking artists of their ancestors’ time. Reflect,
-then, upon the heavy responsibility which lay upon the shoulders of the
-author of to-day. Picture what must be the condition of his conscience
-at the end of his record if he has failed to do his duty by the negro
-dialect! Picture the reproaches of future generations if they should be
-left ignorant of the unique vernacular of their grandfathers’ serfs!
-(Applause.) He did not lay such stress upon the superior importance of
-the negro dialect because he had enrolled himself among its faulty
-exponents; he had taken his place in its ranks _because_ of that
-superior importance. Nevertheless, he was by no means blind to the
-virtues of those other eight delightful strings in the Great National
-Instrument. No one enjoyed more than he the liquid and incomprehensible
-softness of the Creole, the penetrating, nasonic strength of the Yankee,
-the delicious independence of the Hoosier, the pine-sweet, redwood-calm
-transcriptions of the prose-laureate of the West. He loved them all, and
-he gloried in the literary monument of which they were the separate
-stones.
-
-To do Mr. Cryder’s oration justice would be a feat which no modest
-novelist would attempt. Those who would read that memorable speech in
-its entirety and its purity will find it in the archives of the club, in
-the sixth volume of the Sessional Records. After reading brief and pithy
-extracts from the nine most famous dialect stories of the day, he sat
-down with the applause of approval in his ears.
-
-Hermia turned to Mr. Overton: “He was guying, I suppose,” she said.
-
-Mr. Overton stared. “Certainly not,” he said, severely. “The value of
-precisely rendered dialect is incalculable.”
-
-Hermia, quite snubbed, said no more; and in a few moments, Mr. Duncan, a
-shrewd, humorous-looking little Scotchman, rose to reply.
-
-“I have nothing whatever to say in contradiction to Mr. Cryder’s remarks
-regarding the value of dialect,” he said, looking about with a bland,
-deprecating smile. “On the contrary, I have yet another word to add in
-its favor. I hold that the value of dialect to the American author has
-never yet been estimated. When a story has a lot of dialect, you never
-discover that it hasn’t anything else. (Laughter, and a surprised frown
-from Cryder.) Furthermore, as America is too young to have an
-imagination, the dialect is an admirable and original substitute for
-plot and situations.” (Laughter and mutterings; also a scowl from
-Cryder.) “Again, there is nothing so difficult as the handling of modern
-English: it is a far speedier and easier road to fame to manipulate a
-dialect familiar to only an insignificant section of our glorious sixty
-millions.” (“Hear, hear!” from a pair of feminine lips, and many
-sympathetic glances at Cryder’s flashing eyes.) “Yet again, the common
-fault found with our (I wish it understood that I speak always from the
-standpoint of the country which I have adopted)—with our writers is
-lack of passion. Now, nobody can be expected to be passionate when
-groaning in the iron stays of dialect. Dialect is bit and curb to the
-emotions, and it is only an American who is sharp enough to perceive the
-fact and make the most of it. What is more, pathos sounds much better in
-dialect than in cold, bald English, just as impropriety sounds better in
-French, and love-making in Spanish. Contrast, for instance, the relative
-pathos of such sentences as these—the throbbing sadness of the one, the
-harsh bathos of the other: ‘I done lubbed you, Sally!’ ‘I loved you,
-Maria.’” (Laughter from one side of the house; ominous silence from the
-other.) “Truly, ’tis in the setting the jewel shines. I would like to
-say, in conclusion,” he went on, imperturbably, “that Mr. Cryder, in his
-enumeration of American neologics has omitted one as important and
-distinctive as any in his category, namely, that of fashionable society.
-In the virility, the variety, and the amplitude of her slang, America is
-England’s most formidable rival.”
-
-He left the platform amidst limited applause, and then Mr. Cryder’s
-pent-up wrath burst forth, and he denounced in scathing terms and
-stinging epigrams the foreigner who had proved himself incapable of
-appreciating one of his country’s most remarkable developments, and
-attempted to satirize it from his petty point of view.
-
-The auditors were relieved when the exercises were over and the club’s
-disruption postponed, and, betaking themselves to the supper-room,
-dismissed both lecture and reply from their minds.
-
-Hermia was standing by one of the tables talking to three or four men,
-when Mr. Simms brought up Cryder and introduced him. Cryder looked
-absent and somewhat annoyed. He was evidently not in a mood to be
-impressed by feminine loveliness. At the end of a few moments Hermia
-wisely let him go, although with a renewed sense of the general flatness
-of life. At the same time she was somewhat amused, and sensible enough
-to know that it could not have been otherwise.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XIII.
-
-
- OGDEN CRYDER.
-
-Only the nineteenth century could have evolved Cryder. The infancy of a
-democratic civilization produces giants. The giants build hot-houses,
-and a flower, delicate, beautiful, exquisitely perfumed, but fragile,
-light as bubbles of blown glass, is the result. America is now doing the
-best she can with her hot-house flora. She has no great men, but the
-flora is wondrous fine. Outside the forcing-houses is a wilderness of
-weeds in which lies her future’s hope.
-
-Cryder would have taken the medal at an orchid show. He was light as a
-summer breeze, yet as stimulating and fresh. He was daintily humorous,
-yet seldom witty enough to excite envy. His conversation was like the
-song of a lark, clear, brilliant, trilling, with never a bass note to
-disturb the harmony. In a quick, keen, flashing way, he had an exact
-knowledge of the salient world. He was artistic to his finger-tips, and
-preferred an aquarelle to an oil. He had loved many times and hoped to
-love as many more, and his love was always that of an æsthete. For
-coarse passions he had a cold contempt. He had broken many roses from
-their stems, but more because he thought an herbarium looked better when
-filled than because he enjoyed the plucking of the flower. Probably it
-is needless to observe that he never drank more than a pint bottle of
-champagne, and that he never over-ate.
-
-The day after his address at the club he was walking down the avenue
-when he met Helen Simms. He turned back with her, and finished the
-afternoon in her drawing-room.
-
-Helen did not give him so much of her time without an object. She cared
-little for Cryder, and few of her doings were unprompted by motive; life
-was too brief.
-
-“You met Miss Suydam last night, did you not?” she asked, when Cryder
-was comfortably established in an easy-chair near the fire.
-
-“Yes, for a moment. I was a little put out by Duncan’s attack on me, and
-only stayed for a few words. I needed the solace of a cigarette.”
-
-“I read the account of the affair in this morning’s papers. Mr. Duncan’s
-remarks were purely foolish, as he must have realized when he saw them
-in print. However, you have the consolation of knowing that after your
-reply he will not be likely to attack you again. But I am glad you met
-Miss Suydam. She will interest you as a study. She is all the rage at
-present. Every other man in town is in love with her.”
-
-Cryder turned to her with some interest in his eyes. “Is she so very
-fascinating? She is certainly handsome—yes—stylishly handsome.”
-
-“Oh, she is a beauty! Such a unique type! And she is quite as different
-from other people herself. That is her great trouble. She is called a
-terrible flirt, but it is the men’s fault, not hers. She is always
-looking for something, and can never find it.”
-
-“Sad and strange! Is she a young woman with yearnings?”
-
-“Not at all. She is the most sensible woman I know. She is merely
-unusually clever, consequently she is very lonely. I do not believe any
-man will ever satisfy her. She is like the sleeping princess in the
-enchanted castle. She shuts herself up in that wonderful house of hers
-and dreams of the lover who never comes.”
-
-“You touch my fancy; and what do you mean by her wonderful house?”
-
-“That house would delight your author’s soul. Every room is the
-materialization of a dream, as Hermia would say;” and she gave him an
-account of her friend’s inartistic but original abode.
-
-Cryder listened with much interest. Romance was a dead-letter to him,
-but he was alive to the picturesque. He concluded that it would be quite
-enchanting to make love to a woman in a feudal library or an Indian
-jungle, and more than satisfactory to awaken the sleeping beauty. It
-would be a charming episode for his present brief stay in New York,
-altogether quite the choicest specimen in his herbarium. What she was
-waiting for was a combination of brain and skill.
-
-“You have made me want to know her,” he said, “but, of course, she did
-not ask me to call.”
-
-“I will take you to see her some time.”
-
-“That is very good of you. Some afternoon when you have nothing better
-to do.”
-
-“Come on Monday. That is her day. You won’t have much chance to talk to
-her, but then you can go again as soon as you like.”
-
-Cryder took out his note-book and penciled a memorandum, “On Monday,
-then.”
-
-Helen concluded that if she had been born a man she would have elected
-diplomacy as a career.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XIV.
-
-
- IN A METROPOLITAN JUNGLE.
-
-Cryder called on Hermia Monday afternoon. Although the room was full he
-had a few words with her, and she thought him very charming.
-
-“I want to talk to you,” he said. “I have wanted to talk to you ever
-since I met you, but I was in such a bad humor the other night that I
-would not inflict you. Are you ever alone? Cannot I have an hour or two
-some evening?”
-
-Hermia smiled. “Come on Thursday evening. I have not another evening
-until late next week.”
-
-“I have an engagement, but I will break it. And will you think me
-impertinent if I ask you to show me all over this wonderful house? There
-is nothing like it in Europe.”
-
-“I shall be delighted,” said Hermia, enthusiastically. “So few people
-appreciate it.”
-
-“It is good of you to think I can. But in thought I always dwell in the
-past (he hated the past), and although my work is realistic, because
-realism is of more value to literature, yet my nature is essentially a
-romantic one. Only, one so seldom acknowledges romance, one is so afraid
-of being laughed at.”
-
-He watched her as he spoke, and saw a sudden gleam come into her eyes. A
-year’s training and her own native cleverness had taught Hermia not to
-believe all that men said to her, but Cryder had struck a well-loved
-chord. And she had no wish to be skeptical.
-
-On Thursday evening Hermia arrayed herself with great care. After much
-deliberation she donned a gown which as yet she had never worn. It was
-of tan-gold velvet, with irregular appliqués of dark-brown plush. Down
-the front was a curious design of gold braid and deep-green brilliants.
-
-She received Cryder in the conservatory. It had but recently been
-completed, and looked enough like a jungle to deceive the most
-suspicious of tigers. The green tiles of the floor were painted with a
-rank growth of grasses and ferns. Through the palms and tropical shrubs
-that crowded the conservatory glared the wild beasts of far-off jungles,
-marvelously stuffed and poised. The walls were forgotten behind a
-tapestry of reeds and birds of the Orient. In one corner was a fountain,
-simulating a pool, and on its surface floated the pink, fragrant lilies
-that lie on eastern lakes. Few people had seen this jungle—before its
-completion, Hermia had learned that it was dangerous to test her city’s
-patience too far.
-
-Hermia sat down on a bank and waited for the curtain to rise. She felt
-the humor of the situation, but she knew that the effect was good. A few
-moments later Cryder came in and was charmed. He had the same remote
-yearning for the barbaric that the small, blonde actor has for the part
-of the heavy villain. As he walked down the jungle toward Hermia, he
-felt that he gave this Eastern ideal its completing touch.
-
-Hermia held up her hand. “I would not have dared do this for any one but
-you,” she said, “but you will understand.”
-
-“For Heaven’s sake do not apologize!” exclaimed Cryder. He raised her
-hand to his lips and sat down on the bank beside her. “There was never
-anything so enchanting in real life. And you—you are Cleopatra in your
-tiger-hood.”
-
-“I was Semiramis before,” said Hermia, indifferently. She turned her
-head and gave him a meditative glance. “Do you know,” she said, with an
-instinct of coquetry rare to her, “I cannot understand your being a
-realistic author.”
-
-He was somewhat taken aback, but he replied promptly: “That is a mere
-accident. To tell you the truth, I care no more for realism than I do
-for idealism, and dialect is a frightful bore. I will tell you what I
-have told no one else. Now that my position is established, my name
-made, I am going to leave dialect to those who can do no better, and
-write a great romantic novel.”
-
-Hermia thought his last remark a trifle conceited, but she forgave it
-for the sake of its sentiment. “I shall like that,” she said, “and be
-romantic without sensationalism. Tell me the plot of your book.”
-
-“It is too vague to formulate, but you and your house are to be its
-inspiration. I have wanted to meet a woman like you; the study will be
-an education. Tell me of your life. You have not always been as you are
-now?”
-
-Hermia gave him a startled glance. “What do you mean?” she demanded.
-
-“I mean that you have two personalities, an actual and an assumed. You
-are playing a part.”
-
-Hermia gave him a fierce glance from beneath her black brows. “You know
-that until a year ago I was poor and obscure, and you are rude enough to
-remind me that I play the part of _grande dame_ very badly,” she
-exclaimed.
-
-“I beg your pardon,” said Cryder, quickly, “I knew nothing of the kind.
-You might have spent the last ten years in a fashionable boarding-school
-for all I have heard to the contrary. But I repeat what I said. I
-received two impressions the night we met. One was that you were at war
-with something or somebody; the other that you had a double personality,
-and that of one the world had no suspicion. It is either that you have a
-past, or that you are at present in conditions entirely new and
-consequently unfamiliar. I believe it is the latter. You do not look
-like a woman who has _lived_. There is just one thing wanting to make
-your face the most remarkable I have seen; but until it gets that it
-will be like a grand painting whose central figure has been left as the
-last work of the artist.”
-
-Hermia leaned her elbow on her knee and covered her face with her hand.
-She experienced the most pleasurable sensation she had ever known. This
-was the first man who had shown the faintest insight into her
-contradictory personality and complicated nature. For the moment she
-forgot where she was, and she gave a little sigh which brought the blood
-to her face. To love would not be so difficult as she had imagined.
-
-“What is it?” asked Cryder, gently. He had been watching her covertly.
-“I want to amend something I said a moment ago. You have not lived in
-fact but you have in imagination, and the men your fancy has created
-have made those of actual, prosaic life appear tame and colorless.”
-
-Hermia’s heart gave a bound. She turned to him with shining eyes. “How
-do you know that?” she murmured.
-
-“Is it not true?”
-
-“Yes,” she said, helplessly, “it is true.”
-
-“Then I will tell you how I know. Because I have lived half my natural
-life with the population of my brain, and dream-people know one another.
-Ours have met and shaken hands while we have been exchanging
-platitudes.”
-
-“That is very pretty,” said Hermia; “I hope their estates border upon
-each other, and that their chosen landscape is the same, for
-dream-people may have their antipathies, like the inhabitants of the
-visible world. Because we have taken out our title-deeds in dream-land,
-it does not follow that our tenants live in harmony.”
-
-“It would not—except that we both instinctively know that there has not
-been even border warfare. There have been marriage and inter-marriage;
-the princes of my reigning house have demanded in state——”
-
-Hermia interrupted him harshly: “There is no marriage or giving in
-marriage in my kingdom. I hate the word! Are you very much shocked?”
-
-Cryder smiled. “No,” he said, “one is surprised sometimes to hear one’s
-own dearest theories in the mouth of another, but not shocked. It only
-needed that to make you the one woman I have wanted to know. You have
-that rarest gift among women—a catholic mind. And it does not spring
-from immorality or vulgar love of excitement—you are simply brave and
-original.”
-
-Hermia leaned forward, her pupils dilating until her eyes looked like
-rings of marsh about lakes of ink. “You know that—you understand that?”
-she whispered, breathlessly.
-
-Cryder looked her full in the eyes. “Yes,” he said, “and no one ever did
-before.”
-
-His audacity had the desired effect. Men were always a little afraid of
-Hermia. She looked at him without speaking—a long gaze which he
-returned. He was certainly most attractive, although in quite a
-different way from any man born of her imaginings. Perhaps, however,
-that gave him the charm of novelty. He was almost magnetic; he almost
-thrilled her—not quite, but that would come later. She had received so
-many impressions this evening that no one could master her. Yes, she was
-sure she was going to love him.
-
-“No,” she said, at last, “no one ever did.”
-
-“You have been loved in a great many ways,” Cryder went on; “for your
-beauty, which appeals to the senses of men, yet which at the same time
-frightens them, because of the tragic element which is as apparent as
-the passionate; for your romantic surroundings, which appeal to their
-sentiment; for the glamour which envelops you as one of the most
-sought-after women in New York; for your intellect; and for your
-incomprehensibility to the average mind, which has the fascination of
-mystery. But I doubt if any man has ever known or cared whether you have
-a psychic side. If I fall in love with you, I shall love your soul,
-primarily. Passion is merely the expression of spiritual exaltation.
-Independently of the latter it is base. A woman of your strong psychical
-nature could never forget the soul for the body—not for a moment.”
-
-“That is very beautiful,” murmured Hermia, dreamily. “Can it be? And are
-you sure that I have any spirituality?”
-
-“If you do not know it, it is because you have never loved and never
-been loved in the right way.” He sprang suddenly to his feet, and then,
-before she could answer, he was gone.
-
-She sank her elbow into a cushion and leaned her cheek on her palm.
-Cryder had touched her sensuous nature by the artistic novelty of his
-wooing—her ideal had been brutal and direct. She had always imagined
-she should like that best, but this was a new idea and very charming. It
-appealed to the poetic element in her. The poetic vase tossed aloft the
-spray of refined passion and rode contemptuously over the undertow of
-sensuality. That was as it should be.
-
-She went up-stairs, and, after she was in bed, thought for a long time.
-She slept until late the next day, and in the afternoon paid a number of
-calls. In the temporary seclusion of her carriage she took pleasure in
-assuring herself that Cryder was uppermost in her mind.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XV.
-
-
- A CLEVER TRIFLER.
-
-The next afternoon Cryder came again. Hermia received him this time in
-the hall which, with its Gothic roof, its pictured windows, its walls
-ribbed and dark, and its organ, looked like a cathedral. As she came
-down the broad staircase, in a gown that made her look as if she had
-stepped from some old French canvas, Cryder stood gazing at her for a
-moment, then without a word sat down before the organ and began to play.
-The organ needs only a skillful hand; its own rich, sonorous tones pour
-soul through cold, calm fingers. Cryder played Tristan’s Death Song, and
-Hermia sank into a chair and felt that naught existed but glory of color
-and surge of sound.
-
-Cryder played but a short time—he never did anything too long—then
-went over and sat beside her. He made her talk about herself, and
-managed to extract much of her past. He learned nothing, however, of her
-former lack of beauty. Then he entertained her brilliantly for an hour
-with accounts of celebrated people he had met.
-
-After he had gone she felt a vague sense of disappointment; he had not
-touched upon co-personal topics for a moment. The sense of
-disappointment grew and deepened, and then she gave a sudden start and
-smiled. She could not feel disappointment were she not deeply
-interested. Was this the suffering, the restlessness, which were said to
-be a part of love? Surely! She was pained that he could talk lightly
-upon indifferent subjects, and apparently quite forget the sympathy
-which existed between them. The pain and the chagrin might not be very
-acute, but they were forewarnings of intenser suffering to come. Of
-course she wanted to suffer. All women do until the suffering comes.
-After that they do not go out of their way to look for it.
-
-She went up-stairs and sat down before the fire in her boudoir. It was
-very delightful to fall in love with a man as mentally agreeable as
-Cryder. He would always entertain her. She would never be bored! The
-intervals between love-making would never drag; she had heard that they
-were sometimes trying. And then the pictures between those framing
-intervals—when the fierce, hot tide of passion within her would leap
-like a tidal wave, lashed into might by the convulsion at its heart. And
-Cryder! To see the tiger in the man fling off its shackles and look
-through the calm brown of his eyes! (Like all girls, Hermia believed
-that every man had a tiger chained up inside him, no matter how cold he
-might be exteriorly.) What a triumph to break down that cool
-self-control!
-
-Her maid brought her a cup of tea and she drank it; then, resting her
-elbows on her knees leaned her chin on her locked fingers. There were
-some things she did not like about Cryder. He lacked literary
-conscience, and she doubted if he had much of any sort. Her high ideals
-still clung to her; but perhaps this was her mission in life—to remold
-Cryder. A man is always much under the influence of the woman who gives
-him his happiness; she would have a grand opportunity to make him
-better. When the end came, as of course it would—she was no longer such
-a fool as to imagine that love lasted forever—he should have much to
-thank her for.
-
-When a woman thinks she loves a man, she dreams of making him better.
-When she really loves him, she would have him share his virtues with the
-saints. She loves his faults and encourages them; she glories in the
-thought that his personality is strong enough to make her indifferent to
-defects. This lesson, however, Hermia had yet to learn; but she was
-pleased with the idea of putting the spirituality of which Cryder had
-accused her to some practical use. She had not a very clear idea what
-spirituality meant, but she thought she was learning.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XVI.
-
-
- A LITERARY DINNER.
-
-A few weeks later Hermia gave a dinner to Cryder. The other guests were
-Mr. Overton, Mr. Simms, Alan Emmet, a young author who combined the
-literary and the sensational in a manner which gave him much notoriety,
-Mr. Langley, Cryder’s publisher, and Ralph Embury, a noted young
-journalist. Helen Simms was there to chatter serious thought to ambush,
-and Miss Starbruck, primly alert, and waiting to be shocked.
-
-Poor Miss Starbruck! She drifted like a gray shadow through Hermia’s
-rooms, and longed for her modest cottage at Nantucket. She had been an
-active member of sewing-circles and reading-clubs, and the farther down
-her past’s perspective did this unexciting environment retreat, the
-oftener did she sigh as she contrasted its cool shadows with the hot
-glare into which fate’s caprice had suddenly cast her. But Hermia was
-considerate—if Miss Starbruck appeared at her niece’s dinners and
-receptions, and drove with her occasionally, she could sit up in her
-room and dream of Nantucket and bewail duty as much as she pleased. Mrs.
-Dykman was chaperon-in-chief.
-
-Hermia wore a gown of white velvet, simply made, and fitting in
-wrinkleless perfection the free lines and curves of her full, lithe
-figure. About her throat hung a silver chain of Roman workmanship, and
-around her waist a girdle of similar but heavier links. The wiry maze of
-her hair outshone the diamond pins that confined it.
-
-Miss Simms wore a dinner-gown of black tulle and a profusion of
-chrysanthemums. Her hair was as sleek as a mole.
-
-The conversation was naturally more or less literary, and Hermia drew
-out her ambitious guests with a good deal of skill. It was hard to curb
-them when they were started, but she managed to make each feel that he
-had had an opportunity to shine. Some day, when her personal interest in
-life had ceased, she intended to have a _salon_, and this was a pleasant
-foretaste. She even let Mr. Simms tell a few anecdotes, but after the
-third gently suppressed him.
-
-It is not easy to check the anecdotal impulse, and both Mr. Langley and
-Mr. Overton were reminiscent. The former told a tale of a young man who
-had brought him a manuscript ten years before, and never returned to ask
-its destiny.
-
-“He looked delicate, and I imagine he died of consumption,” said the
-great publisher, placidly, as he discussed his pâté. “At all events I
-have never heard from him since. Our readers unanimously advised us not
-to publish the manuscript. It was entirely out of our line, and would
-have involved great risk. We put it aside and forgot all about it. The
-other day I happened to meet one of the readers through whose hands it
-passed—he has not been with us for some years—and he asked me why I
-did not publish the rejected book. ‘That sort of thing has become
-fashionable now,’ he said, ‘and you would make money out of it.’ I
-merely mention this as an illustration of how fashion changes in
-literature as in everything else.”
-
-“You publishers are awful cowards,” said Emmet, in his drawling tones;
-“you are so afraid of anything new that all authors you introduce are
-branded Prophets of the Commonplace.”
-
-Mr. Langley’s blonde, pleasant little face took a warmer hue, and he
-answered somewhat testily: “The publisher was brave, indeed, who
-presented you to the public, Mr. Emmet.”
-
-In spite of the general laugh, Emmet replied imperturbably: “The best
-advertisement I had, and the only one which I myself inserted, was that
-‘Mrs. Bleeker’ had been refused by every conservative house in New York.
-My reward is that I have the reputation instead of the firm.”
-
-“No; the firm hasn’t any left—that’s a fact,” retorted Mr. Langley; and
-Emmet turned to Helen with a pout on his boyish face.
-
-“Do my books shock you?” he asked her.
-
-Helen smiled. “No, they do not,” she said, briefly. “I quite adore them.
-I don’t always acknowledge having read them, but I don’t mind telling
-you, considering that you are the author.”
-
-“Oh, some women assure me that nothing would induce them to read my
-books. I am glad you have the courage of your opinions. I scorn women
-who have not, and I will not talk to a girl unless I can do so as freely
-as to a man.”
-
-“Oh, I am not a prude,” said Helen, lightly. “I only draw the line at
-positive indecency, and you are quite vague enough. But do you always
-talk to men on improper subjects?”
-
-“Oh—no; I merely meant that I like to feel the same lack of restraint
-with women as with men. It is a bore to call up every thought for
-inspection before you utter it.”
-
-“Yes,” said Helen; “you wouldn’t talk at all, you would only inspect.”
-
-“Speaking of mysterious disappearances,” broke in Embury’s voice, “what
-has become of that girl who used to give us such bucketfuls of soulful
-lava?—the one who signed herself ‘Quirus’?”
-
-Mr. Overton laughed, and much to Hermia’s relief every one turned to
-him. “She brought me that poem I published, herself, and I came near
-laughing outright once or twice. I have seen few plainer women; there
-was such a general dinginess about her. At the same time there was a
-certain magnetism which, I imagine, would have been pronounced had she
-been a stronger woman. But I should not be surprised to hear that she
-had died of consumption.”
-
-“Is it possible?” said Embury. “Her work was strong, however. Why didn’t
-you take her in hand and bring her up in the way she should go?”
-
-“My dear Embury, life is too short. That girl was all wrong. She worked
-her syllogisms backward, so to speak. Her intellect was molten with the
-heat of her imagination, and stunted with the narrowness of her
-experience. She reasoned from effect to cause. Her characters, instead
-of being the carefully considered products of environment and heredity,
-were always altered or distorted to suit some dramatic event. Intellect
-without experience of the heart and of life is responsible for more
-errors than innate viciousness which is controlled by worldly wisdom, or
-natural folly which is clothed in the gown of accumulated knowledge. I
-have seen so many clever writers go to pieces,” he added, regarding his
-empty plate with a sigh; “they lie so. They have no conscience whatever,
-and they are too clever to see it.”
-
-“Then how can they help themselves?” asked Hermia, with a puzzled look.
-
-“They had better wait until they can.”
-
-Hermia did not care to pursue the subject, and saw, moreover, that
-Embury was waiting to be heard. “What would journalism do if no one knew
-how to lie?” she asked him, with a smile, and was somewhat surprised
-when every man at the table except Embury laughed aloud.
-
-Embury colored, but replied promptly: “It would probably die for want of
-patronage.”
-
-“You are right, Embury,” said Cryder. “You could not have found a more
-appreciative field for your talents.”
-
-Embury looked at him reproachfully, and Cryder continued: “I never could
-resist the temptation to kick a friend when he was down. I will give you
-an opportunity later.”
-
-“Life is made up of lost opportunities—I probably shall not see it.
-True, I might review your books, but to do so I should have to read
-them.”
-
-“Is this the way literary people always spar?” murmured Hermia to
-Cryder.
-
-“Oh! do not let it worry you,” he replied. “This is only
-facetiousness—American humor. It doesn’t hurt.” He dropped his voice.
-“Are you not well? You look tired.”
-
-“I am tired,” said Hermia, returning his gaze—he seemed very near to
-her at that moment. “Clever people, singly, are very delightful, but _en
-masse_ they keep one on the rack.”
-
-“Don’t bother any more!” said Cryder. “Leave them to me; I will take
-care of them.”
-
-“You are good,” murmured Hermia. “When I am old I shall like a _salon_;
-I shall like the power of it. Now—it bores me a little.”
-
-Cryder bent somewhat nearer to her. “Do not wait too long for anything,”
-he murmured. “A man’s power comes with age; a woman’s power goes with
-age.”
-
-He turned from her suddenly and addressed a remark to Embury which
-immediately gave that clever young man a chance to entertain his
-companions for ten minutes. Hermia found herself drifting from her
-guests. She had undergone many evolutions of thought and feeling during
-the past few weeks. At times she had believed herself in love with
-Cryder; at others, she had been conscious of indifferent liking. She was
-puzzled to find that his abstract image thrilled her more than his
-actual presence. On the other hand, she _liked_ him better when with
-him. He was so entertaining, so sympathetic; he had such delicate tact
-and charm. When absent, she sometimes thought of him with a certain
-distaste; he had qualities that she disliked, and he was diametrically
-different from all imagined lovers. Then she would make up her mind to
-close her eyes to his deficiencies and to love him spiritually. She
-would compel herself to think of him for hours together on an exalted
-mental and spiritual plane, where passion had no place. Not that she
-believed him incapable of passion, by any means—she believed that all
-men were constructed on the same plan—but he was so different from that
-man who now dwelt behind a barred door in her brain that she felt it her
-duty, to both, to love him in a different way. She was surprised to find
-that after such æsthetic communion she almost hated him. Reaction
-following excess of passion may be short-lived; but immoderate
-sentimentality leaves a mental ennui that requires a long convalescence.
-Sentimentality is a growth of later civilization, and trails its roots
-over the surface like a pine; while passion had its seeds planted in the
-garden of Eden, and is root, branch, twig, and leaf of human nature.
-
-In summing up her sensations she had come to the conclusion that on the
-whole she was in love with him. No one had ever moved her one-tenth as
-much before. If she had not lost her head about him, it was because her
-nature had slept too long to awake in a moment. That would come by
-degrees. There were times when she felt the impulse to cast herself on
-her face and sob farewell to the dreams of her youth and to the lover
-who had been a being more real than Ogden Cryder; but she thrust aside
-the impulse with a frown and plunged into her daily life.
-
-At opportune moments Hermia’s attention returned to her guests. Miss
-Starbruck rose at a signal from her niece and the women went into the
-library. The men joined them soon after, and Cryder, much to the
-gratitude of his tired and dreamy hostess, continued to entertain them
-until eleven o’clock, when they went home.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XVII.
-
-
- AN ILLUSION DISPELLED.
-
-The front door had closed after the last guest, the butler had turned
-down the lights in the hall, Miss Starbruck had gone up-stairs, and
-Hermia was standing by the library fire. She heard some one come down
-the hall, and turned her head, her expression of indifference and mental
-fatigue lifting a little. The portière was pushed aside and Cryder
-entered the room.
-
- * * * * *
-
-The next morning Hermia stood gazing at her bedroom fire for a few
-moments before going down-stairs. Her face wore a peculiar expression.
-“Is there anything in love?” she murmured, half aloud. “_Is_ there?”
-
-She went down to the library and sank listlessly into a chair, and
-covered her face with her hands. She did not love Cryder. There was but
-one answer to the question now. Imagination and will had done their
-utmost, but had been conquered by fact. She had made a horrible mistake.
-She felt an impulse to fling herself on the floor and shriek aloud. But
-the self-control of years was stronger than impulse. In spite of the
-softening influences of happier conditions, she must suffer or enjoy in
-her old dumb way until something had smashed that iron in her nature to
-atoms or melted it to lava.
-
-But, if she was saturated with dull disgust and disappointment, her
-conscience rapped audibly on her inactive brain. It was her duty to
-herself and to Cryder to break the thing off at once—to continue it, in
-fact, was an impossibility. But she shrank from telling Cryder that he
-must go and not return. He loved her, not as she had wanted to be loved,
-perhaps, but with his heart, his sentiment. She liked him—very much
-indeed—and had no desire to give him pain. He might suffer the more
-keenly because of the fineness of his sensibilities. Suppose he should
-kill himself? Men so often killed themselves for women who did not love
-them. She remembered that she had dreamed of men dying for hopeless love
-of her; but, now that it seemed imminent, the romance was gone. It would
-be nothing but a vulgar newspaper story after all.
-
-What should she do? She must tell him. She turned to her desk, then sank
-back into her chair. She could not write. He would come again that
-evening. She would tell him then. Written words of that sort were always
-brutal.
-
-How she got through that day she never knew. It seemed as if the very
-wheels of life were clogged. The sky was gray and the snow fell heavily;
-the gas had to be lighted in the house. No one called; but Hermia was
-willing to be left to solitude. She was not restless, she was dully
-indifferent. The grayness of the day entered into her and enveloped her;
-life in the Brooklyn flat had never looked colder and barer than in this
-palace which her will and her wealth had created.
-
-When evening came she gave orders that no one but Cryder should be
-admitted. Somewhat to her surprise he did not come. She did not care
-particularly, but went to bed at half-past nine, and had Miss Newton rub
-her to sleep.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XVIII.
-
-
- A BLOODLESS ENTHUSIAST.
-
-Cryder did not come the next day or evening, nor did he write. At first
-Hermia experienced a mild fear that he was ill; but Helen Simms called
-the following morning and said, en passant, that she had met him a few
-moments before on the street. Then Hermia began to be piqued and a
-little mortified. For several hours she thought less about dismissing
-him. The next day the whole thing seemed like a dream; she caught
-herself wondering if it had really happened. At this point she received
-a note from Cryder.
-
- “It is a year since I have seen you, but I have a book due at
- the publisher’s on Thursday, and I have been working night and
- day. After the weary grind is over you will see too much of me.
- In the mean time I am with you always. In fancy I look into your
- eyes and see the waves break over the rocks, and watch the moon
- coquet with the tides. Now the green bosom of the sea is placid
- for a moment, and I see * * * the mermaids * * * sleeping in
- their caves—
-
- “Until to-night!
- “O. C.”
-
-Hermia shrugged her shoulders. It was very pretty, but rather tame. At
-the same time her pride was glad to be reassured that he still loved
-her, and she once more put her dismissal into mental shape and blunted
-the arrow of decree with what art she possessed.
-
-When he was shown into the library that evening she rose nervously,
-wondering how she was to keep him from kissing her. He raised her hand
-lightly to his lips after his old habit, complimented her Catherine de’
-Medici gown, and threw himself into an easy-chair by the fire.
-
-“How grateful this fire is!” he exclaimed. “It is one of those horrid,
-sleety nights. The horse slipped once or twice.”
-
-“Did you come in a cab?” asked Hermia.
-
-“Yes; I had not the courage to face that long block from the elevated.”
-
-He settled himself back in his chair, asked permission to light a
-cigarette, and for an hour entertained her in his most brilliant vein.
-Hermia listened with the most complex sensations of her life. The
-predominating one at first was intense mortification. There was no
-danger of this man blowing out his brains for any woman. She was rather
-the most agreeable woman he knew just then, but—there were plenty of
-others in the world. Then her brain and her philosophy came to her aid,
-and she began to be amused. She had always been able to laugh at her own
-expense, and she indulged in a little private burst whilst Cryder was
-reciting a graphic passage from his lately finished book. The laugh
-added several years to her twenty-five, but on the whole, she concluded,
-it did her good.
-
-Then she began to reason: Why break it off? He is the most agreeable man
-I have ever known; why lose him? If I dismiss him thus cavalierly, he
-will be piqued at least, and I shall not even have his friendship. And I
-can never love or have a throb of real feeling. All that was the
-delusion of a morbid imagination. There are no men like those I have
-dreamed of. The ocean rolls between the actual and the ideal.
-
-She did Cryder some injustice in the earlier part of her meditations. He
-was really very fond of her. There were many things about her that he
-liked immensely. She was beautiful, she was artistic, she had a fine
-mind, and, above all things, she was the fashion, and he had carried her
-off. But he never rushed at a woman and kissed her the moment he entered
-the room; he did not think it good taste. Moreover, she looked
-particularly handsome in that black-velvet gown and stiff white ruff,
-and her position in that carved, high-backed chair was superb. His eye
-was too well pleased to allow the interference of his other senses.
-After a time he went over and lifted her face and kissed her. She
-shrugged her shoulders a little but made no resistance.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XIX.
-
-
- TASTELESS FRUIT.
-
-She began to have an absurdly married feeling. When she had made up her
-mind to drift on the wave she had chosen, she had consoled herself with
-the thought that, if love was a disappointment, the situation was
-romantic. By constantly reminding herself that she was the heroine of
-“an experience,” she could realize in part her old wild dreams. To
-create objective illusion was a task she soon renounced. No matrimonial
-conditions were ever more prosaic and matter-of-fact than the various
-phases of this affair.
-
-The evenings were long and very pleasant. Cryder smoked innumerable
-cigarettes in the most comfortable chair in the library, and was never
-dull. Hermia began to get rather fond of him in a motherly sort of way.
-One night he had a cold and she gave him a dose of quinine; occasionally
-she sent him certain of her cook’s dainty concoctions. She always had a
-little supper for him on his particular evenings, and took care that his
-favorite dishes were prepared.
-
-She had her intervals of disgust and fury with fate, but they were
-becoming less frequent. Like all tragic and unversed women she was an
-extremist. She had dreamed that life was one thing; her particular
-episode had taught her that it was another. There was no medium nor
-opposite pole; she had been wrong in every theory.
-
-Ennui was her worst enemy. Sometimes she got tired of the very sound of
-Cryder’s voice—it ceased so seldom. She longed for variety of any sort,
-for something to assure her that she was not as flatly married as Bessie
-and her husband. One day when she was more bored than usual Helen Simms
-came in.
-
-“How brilliant you look!” she exclaimed. “What _is_ the matter with
-you?”
-
-“Ennui; life is a burden.”
-
-“Where is Ogden Cryder? I thought he had put ennui to flight.”
-
-“He is charming,” said Hermia, “and I am having that flirtation with him
-that you advised; but even that is getting a little monotonous.”
-
-“I will tell you what you want,” exclaimed Helen, decidedly. “You want
-to see something of the champagne side of life. You have had enough of a
-flirtation by a library fire in a feudal room; it is time you did
-something a little more _risqué_! Get Mr. Cryder to take you to some
-awfully wicked place to dine—some place which would mean social
-ostracism were you found out—only you mustn’t be found out. There is
-nothing actually wrong in it, and the danger gives one the most
-delightful sensation.”
-
-Hermia elevated her nose. “I hate anything ‘fast,’” she said. “I prefer
-to keep out of that sort of atmosphere.”
-
-“Oh, nonsense! It is the spice of life; the spice without the vulgarity.
-To have all the appearance of being quite wicked, and yet to be actually
-as innocent as a lamb—what more stimulating? It is the only thing which
-has saved my valuable life. I always amuse myself picturing how poor
-papa would look if he should suddenly descend upon me. Then after the
-dinner take a drive through the park in a hansom—at midnight! You quite
-feel as if you were eloping; and yet—with none of the disagreeable
-consequences. You elope, and that is the end of you. You drive through
-the park in a hansom, and go home and to bed like a good little girl.
-The next week—you drive through the park in another hansom. Then you
-feel that life is worth living. Some night you and Mr. Cryder, Mr.
-Winston and myself will have a tear.”
-
-“No!” exclaimed Hermia; “I abominate that sort of thing, and I will not
-go.”
-
-But Helen, unconsciously, had appalled her. Was there no other escape
-from ennui? What a prospect! Mrs. Dykman had promised to take her to
-Europe. She determined to make that lady hasten her plans and go at
-once.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XX.
-
-
- A COMMONPLACE MEETING.
-
-Quintard, after an absence of five years, had returned to New York to
-find Hermia Suydam the sensation of the year. He saw her first at the
-Metropolitan Opera-House, and, overhearing some people discussing her,
-followed the direction of their glances. She had never looked more
-radiant. Her hair shone across the house like burnished brass; her eyes
-had the limpid brilliancy of emeralds, and the black lashes lay heavy
-above and below them; her skin was like ivory against which pomegranate
-pulp had been crushed, and her mouth was as red as a cactus-flower. Her
-neck and arms and a portion of her bust were uncovered. Although it was
-a first night and most of her sister belles were present, her peculiar,
-somewhat barbaric beauty glittered like a planet in a firmament of
-stars.
-
-Quintard left his seat at the end of the second act and walked back and
-forth in the lobby until he met Ralph Embury.
-
-“Do you know Miss Suydam?” he asked the lively little journalist.
-
-Embury hastened to assure him that he had the honor of Miss Suydam’s
-acquaintance.
-
-“Then introduce me,” said Quintard.
-
-Embury went at once to ask Miss Suydam’s permission for the desired
-presentation, and, returning in a few moments, told Quintard to follow
-him. Cryder gave his chair to Quintard, and Hermia was very gracious.
-She talked in a low, full voice as individual as her beauty—a voice
-that suggested the possibility of increasing to infinite volume of
-sound—a voice that might shake a hearer with its passion, or grow
-hoarse as a sea in a storm. Quintard had never heard just such a voice
-before, but he decided—why, he did not define—that the voice suited
-its owner.
-
-She said nothing beyond the small-talk born of the conditions of the
-moment, but she gave him food for speculation, nevertheless. Had it not
-been absurd, he would have said that twice a look of unmistakable terror
-flashed through her eyes. She was looking steadily at him upon both
-occasions—once he was remarking that he was delighted to get back to
-America, and again that he had last seen Tannhäuser at Bayreuth.
-
-He was also perplexed by a vague sense of unreality about her. What it
-meant he could not define; she was not an adventuress, nor was her
-beauty artificial. While he was working at his problems the curtain went
-down on the third act, and she rose to go. She held out her hand to him
-with a frank smile and said good-night. When she had put on her wraps
-she bent her head to him again and went out of the door. Then she turned
-abruptly and walked quickly back to him. The color had spread over her
-face, but the expression of terror had not returned to her eyes. They
-were almost defiant.
-
-“Come and see me,” she said quickly.
-
-He bowed. “I shall be delighted,” he murmured; but she left before he
-had finished.
-
-“She is lovely,” he thought, “but how odd! What is the matter with her?”
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XXI.
-
-
- BACK TO THE PAST.
-
-Hermia gave a little supper after the opera, and, when the last guest
-had gone, she went up to her room and sank down in a heap before her
-bedroom fire. As she stared at the coals, the terrified look came back
-to her eyes and remained there. She had received a shock. And yet
-Quintard had only uttered a dozen sentences, and these she could not
-recall. And she had never seen him before. Had not she? She closed her
-eyes. Once more she was in her little Brooklyn room; that room had been
-transformed * * * and she was not alone. She opened her eyes and gave a
-quick glance about her, then plunged her head between her knees and
-clasped her hands about the back of it. She must conjure up some other
-setting from that strange, far-away past of hers—one that had never
-been reproduced in this house. There had been splendid forests in those
-old domains of hers, forests which harbored neither tigers nor panthers,
-bulbuls nor lotus-lilies. Only the wind sighed through them, or the
-stately deer stalked down their dim, cool aisles. Once more she drifted
-from the present. He was there, that lover of her dreams; she lay in his
-arms; his lips were at her throat. How long and how faithfully she had
-loved him! Every apple on the tree of life they had eaten together. And
-how cavalierly she had dismissed him! how deliberately forgotten him!
-She had not thought of him for months—until to-night.
-
-She raised her head with abrupt impatience and scowled. What folly! How
-many men had not she met with black hair and dark-blue eyes and athletic
-frames? What woman ever really met her ideal? But—there had been
-something besides physical resemblance of build and color. A certain
-power had shone through his eyes, a certain magnetism had radiated from
-him—she shuddered, threw herself back on the rug, and covered her eyes
-with her hands. To meet him now!
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XXII.
-
-
- QUINTARD IS DISCUSSED.
-
-The next afternoon Hermia was sitting in the library with Miss Starbruck
-when Helen came in. Hermia greeted her eagerly. Helen always diverted
-her mind. Perversely, also, she wanted to hear some one speak of
-Quintard.
-
-“I have only a few moments,” said Helen. “I told Mr. Winston to call for
-me at four. We are going to find a place to walk where we shall not meet
-everybody we know——.” She stopped suddenly as she caught sight of Miss
-Starbruck’s gray, erect figure and shocked expression. “I beg your
-pardon, Miss Starbruck,” she said, sweetly; “I did not see you.”
-
-“Why do you object to meeting people you know when you walk with young
-men?” demanded Miss Starbruck, severely.
-
-Helen, by this time, had quite recovered her presence of mind. “Oh! they
-always want to stop and talk,” she said, lightly, “and that is such a
-bore.” Then she turned to Hermia: “I saw Grettan Quintard in your box
-last night. Did you ever hear such a name? As hard as a rock! But I
-imagine it suits him—although he felt pretty bad five years ago.”
-
-“What about?” demanded Hermia.
-
-“You never heard that story? But, to be sure, that was before your time.
-He was awfully in love with Mrs. Theodore Maitland—one of the prettiest
-women in town—and she with him. Everybody was talking, and finally Mr.
-Maitland found it out. He was very cool about it; he calmly went down
-town to a lawyer and told him to begin proceedings for a divorce. He
-sent for his things and took rooms at a hotel. Everybody cut Mrs.
-Maitland, and she felt so horrible that she killed herself. Quintard was
-fearfully upset. He went abroad at once and staid five years. This is
-his first reappearance.”
-
-“A true nineteenth-century romance!” exclaimed Hermia, sarcastically.
-“An intrigue, a divorce court, and a suicide!” But she had listened with
-a feeling of dull jealousy, and the absurdity of it angered her. Her
-imagination had made a fool of her often enough; was she about to weakly
-yield herself to its whip again? What was Quintard or his past to her?
-“I rather liked his face,” she added, indifferently. “Did you know him
-before he went away?”
-
-“Only by sight. I was not out. For the matter of that he went out very
-little himself until the Mrs. Maitland episode. He cared nothing for
-society, and only went into it to be with her. He wasn’t even very much
-of a club man, and had few intimates. I met him the other night at Mrs.
-Trennor-Secor’s dinner, and he took me in. I can’t say I care much for
-him; he’s too quiet. But he is awfully good-looking, and has great
-distinction. It is time,” she added, glancing at the clock, “for Mr.
-Winston to appear.”
-
-“Are you engaged to that young man?” asked Miss Starbruck.
-
-Helen stared. “Oh, no!” she said, with a little laugh; “he is only my
-first infant-in-waiting.”
-
-The “infant” arrived as she spoke. He was a mild, blonde,
-inoffensive-looking youth, so faithful to his type that it was difficult
-to remember him by name until closer acquaintance had called out his
-little individualities. He had his importance and use, however; he knew
-how to get up and carry off a ball. He even attended to the paying of
-the bills when husbands were too busy or had moved to Greenwood. He had
-saved Hermia a great deal of trouble, and she rewarded him by taking him
-to the theater occasionally. He admired her in a distant, awe-struck
-way, much as a pug admires the moon; but he preferred Helen Simms.
-
-“I am afraid you will find it rather cold for walking,” he said to
-Helen, with his nationally incorrect imitation of English drawl and
-accent. “It is quite beastly out, don’t you know?”
-
-“Yes,” said Helen, “I know; but you will have to stand it. Good-bye,
-Hermia. A walk would not hurt you; you are looking pale.”
-
-“Aren’t you going to let me sit down for a moment?” asked Winston.
-
-“No, it is getting late; and, besides, Hermia doesn’t want you. Come.”
-
-They went out, and Miss Starbruck remarked: “That is the average man of
-to-day, I suppose. They were different when I was young.”
-
-“Oh, no; that is not the average man,” said Hermia; “that is only the
-average society man. They are two distinct species, I assure you.”
-
-“Well, at all events, I prefer him to that dreadful Mr. Quintard. I hope
-he will not come to this house, Hermia.”
-
-“Oh, I have invited him,” said Hermia, indifferently. “He shines beside
-some who come here, if you did but know it.”
-
-“Then I am thankful I do not know it,” exclaimed Miss Starbruck. “I
-think I will go up-stairs and talk to Miss Newton.”
-
-“No,” said Hermia, “stay and talk to me. I am bored! I hate to be alone!
-Sit down.”
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XXIII.
-
-
- PLATONIC PROSPECTS.
-
-She met Quintard the next afternoon at a tea. She was standing with a
-group of people when he joined her. After a moment he asked her to go
-over to the other side of the room and talk to him. She was somewhat
-amused at his directness, but went with him to a sofa and ignored the
-rest of the company for a half-hour.
-
-At the end of that time she drew a long sigh of relief. He was not her
-ideal; he was commonplace. He talked very well, but with none of
-Cryder’s brilliancy. He was even a little didactic, a quality she
-detested. And he had none of the tact of an accomplished man of the
-world. She was not surprised to hear that he had not been to five
-entertainments in as many years. There was no subtle flattery in his
-manner; he did not appear to take any personal interest in her whatever;
-sometimes he appeared inattentive to what she was saying. She wondered
-why he had insisted upon talking to her. Moreover, he was cold, and
-coldness and her ideal had never shaken hands. He looked as if nothing
-could move that calm self-control, that slow, somewhat stiff formality.
-
-She saw him several times during the next two weeks, but never alone. In
-the mean time she heard much of him. His personal appearance, his
-wealth, his exile and its cause, made him an interesting figure, and
-people began to remember and compare all the tales regarding him which
-had floated across the Atlantic during the last five years. These tales
-were of a highly adventurous nature, and were embroidered and fringed.
-
-Quintard was not very grateful. He went out seldom, and got away as soon
-as he could. This, of course, made people wonder what he was doing.
-
-Hermia heard all these stories with some surprise. They seemed so
-incongruous with the man. Assuredly there was neither romance nor love
-of adventure in him; he was quite matter-of-fact; he might have been a
-financier. She thought, however, that he had humor enough to be amused
-at the stories he had inspired.
-
-One evening he found her alone. The night was cold, and she was sitting
-in a heap in a big arm-chair by the fire, huddled up in a soft, bright,
-Japanese gown. She did not rise as he entered, and he looked at her
-calmly and took a seat on the other side of the hearth.
-
-“You look comfortable,” he said. “Those gowns are the warmest things in
-the world. I have one that I wear when I sit by the fire all night and
-think. If my dinner does not agree with me, I do not sleep like a lamb.”
-
-This was romantic! Hermia had a fine contempt for people who recognized
-the existence of their internal organs. She raised her brows. “Why do
-you eat too much?” she demanded.
-
-“Because I happen to feel like it at the time. The philosophy of life is
-to resist as few temptations as you conveniently can. I have made it a
-habit to resist but three.”
-
-“And they are?”
-
-“To tell a woman I love her, to make love to the wife of a friend, and
-to have a girl on my conscience. The latter is a matter of comfort, not
-of principle. The girl of to-day nibbles the apple with her eyes wide
-open.”
-
-Hermia did not know whether she was angry or not. Her experience with
-Cryder had affected her peculiarly. He had the super-refinement of all
-artificial natures, and there had been nothing in his influence to
-coarsen the fiber of her mind. Moreover, he had barely ruffled the
-surface of her nature. She always had a strange feeling of standing
-outside of herself, of looking speculatively on while the material and
-insignificant part of her “played at half a love with half a lover.”
-
-She was not used to such abrupt statements, but she was too much
-interested to change the conversation.
-
-“Do you mean that you never tell a woman when you love her?” she asked,
-after a moment.
-
-“If I loved a woman I should tell her so, of course. I make it a
-principle never to tell a woman that I love her, because I never do. It
-saves trouble and reproaches.”
-
-Hermia leaned forward. “Did not you love Mrs. Maitland?” she asked.
-
-The color mounted to Quintard’s face.
-
-“My dear Miss Suydam, this is the nineteenth century—the latter
-quarter. Love of that sort is an episode, a detached link.” He leaned
-forward and smiled. “I suppose you think I talk like the villain in the
-old-fashioned novel,” he said. “But codes of all sorts have their
-evolutions and modifications. The heroes of the past would cut a
-ridiculous figure in the civilization of to-day. I am not a villain. I
-am merely a man of my prosaic times.”
-
-It was as she had thought—no romance, no love of the past. But the man
-had a certain power; there was no denying that. And his audacity and
-brutal frankness, so different from Cryder’s cold-blooded acting,
-fascinated her.
-
-“Oh, no! I do not think you a villain,” she said; “only I don’t see how
-you could have had the cruelty to——”
-
-“I am inclined to be faithful, Miss Suydam,” he interrupted. “In my
-extreme youth it was the reverse, but experience has taught me to
-appreciate and to hold on to certain qualities when I find them—for in
-combination they are rare. When one comes to the cross-roads, and shakes
-hands good-bye with Youth, his departing comrade gives him a little
-packet. The packet is full of seeds, and the label is ‘philosophy.’”
-
-“I found that packet long before I got to the cross-roads,” said Hermia,
-with a laugh—“that is, if I ever had any youth. How old are you?”
-
-“Oh, only thirty-four as yet. But I got to the cross-roads rather early.
-What do you mean by saying that you never had any youth?”
-
-“Nothing. Are all those European stories about you true?”
-
-“What stories?”
-
-“Oh! all those stories about women. They say you have had the most
-dreadful adventures.”
-
-Quintard shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know what the stories are,” he
-said. “Nor do I particularly care. I am not posing as a masculine Circe
-or a destroyer of households. You must remember that there are more than
-two classes of women in the world. There are many women who are without
-any particular ties, who live a drifting, Bohemian sort of existence,
-who may have belonged to society once, but have exhausted it, and prefer
-the actualities of life. These women are generally the most
-companionable in every respect. And they are more or less indifferent to
-public opinion.”
-
-“I was sure of one thing!” exclaimed Hermia; “but, if possible, you have
-made me more sure: you have not a spark of romance in you.”
-
-An expression of shyness crossed Quintard’s face, and he hesitated a
-moment.
-
-“Oh, well, you know, nobody has in these days,” he said, awkwardly.
-“What would people do with romance? They would never find any one to
-share it.”
-
-“No,” said Hermia, with a laugh, “probably they would not.”
-
-He went away soon after, and she did not see him again for a week.
-Cryder came the next night, and Hermia had never liked him less. He was
-as entertaining as usual, but he was more like highly-charged mineral
-water than ever. He spoke of his personal adventures; they were tame and
-flat. Nothing he said could grasp her, hold her. He seemed merely an
-embodied intellect, a clever, bloodless egoist, babbling eternally about
-his little self. As she sat opposite him, she wondered how she had
-managed to stand him so long. She was glad Quintard had come to relieve
-the monotony. He was the sort of man she would care to have for a
-friend.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XXIV.
-
-
- AN UNEXPECTED CONFESSION.
-
-She met Quintard next at one of Mrs. Dykman’s _musicales_. That
-fashionable lady was fond of entertaining, and Hermia was delighted to
-pay the bills. If it pleased Mrs. Dykman to have her entertainments in
-her own house rather than in the mansion on Second Avenue, she should be
-gratified, and Winston never betrayed family secrets.
-
-People were very glad to go to Mrs. Dykman’s house. She never had any
-surprises for them, but they always went away feeling that her evening
-had been one of the successes of the season. In her palmier days she had
-done much entertaining, and seen a great deal of the world. She had been
-a beauty in her youth, and was still so handsome that people forgot to
-insult her by calling her “well preserved.” If her hair had turned gray,
-the world never found it out; she wore a dark-brown wig which no one but
-her maid had ever seen elsewhere than on her head; and her unfathomable
-gray eyes had not a wrinkle about them. She still carried her head with
-the air of one who has had much incense offered her, and, although her
-repose amounted to monotony, it was very impressive. She had grown
-stout, but every curve of her gowns, every arrangement of draperies,
-lied as gracefully and conclusively as a diplomatist. She was one of the
-few women upon whom Quintard ever called, and he was a great pet of
-hers.
-
-“She may not be an intellectual woman,” he said to Hermia, on this night
-of the _musicale_, “but she has learned enough in her life to make up
-for it. I have seldom met a more interesting woman. If she were twenty
-years younger, I’d ask her to marry and knock about the world with me.”
-
-“Yes? I suppose you find the intellectual a good deal of a bore, do you
-not?”
-
-“Was that a shot? By itself, emphatically yes—a hideous bore. When
-combined with one or two other things, most eagerly to be welcomed.”
-
-“What other things?”
-
-“Oh, womanliness and _savoir_—but, primarily, passion.”
-
-“Do you know that you are very frank?” exclaimed Hermia.
-
-“I beg your pardon,” humbly. “I have a bad habit of saying what I think,
-and, besides, I feel a doubly strong impulse to be frank with you. I
-abominate girls as a rule; I never talk to them. But I have rather a
-feeling of good comradeship with you. It always seems as if you
-_understood_, and it never occurs to me that I can make a mistake with
-you. You are quite unlike other girls. You have naturally a broad mind.
-Do not deliberately contract it.”
-
-“No,” said Hermia, quite mollified, “I have no desire to; and, for some
-peculiar reason, what you say may startle but it never offends. You have
-a way of carrying things off.”
-
-After the music and supper were over, Hermia sat with him awhile
-up-stairs in her aunt’s boudoir.
-
-“Have you idled away your whole life?” she asked. “Do you never intend
-to _do_ anything?”
-
-“Do you think it is doing nothing to spend five years in the study of
-Europe?”
-
-“But what are you going to _do_ with it all? Just keep it in your head?”
-
-“What would you have me do with it? Put it in a book and inflict it on
-the world?”
-
-“Yes. Give yourself some definite object in life. I have no respect for
-people who just drift along—who have no ambition nor aim.”
-
-“Well, I will tell you something if you will promise not to betray me,”
-he said, quickly: “I am writing a book.”
-
-“No?” exclaimed Hermia. “Actually? Tell me about it. Is it a novel? a
-book of travels?”
-
-“Neither. It is a series of lives of certain knights of Norman days
-about whom there are countless fragmentary legends, but nothing has ever
-been written. I am making a humble endeavor to reproduce these legends
-in the style and vernacular of the day and in blank verse. Imagine a
-band of old knights, broken-down warriors, hunted to the death, and
-hiding in a ruined castle. To while away the time they relate their
-youthful deeds of love and war. Do you like the idea?”
-
-Hermia leaned forward with her eyes expanded to twice their natural
-size. “Do you mean to tell me,” she said, “that you care for the
-past—that its romance appeals to you?”
-
-Quintard threw himself back in his chair and raised his eyebrows a
-little. “I have gone so far, I may as well confess the whole thing,” he
-said. “I would have lived in the feudal ages if I could. Love and war!
-That is all man was made for. Everything he has acquired since is
-artificial and in the way. He has lost the faculty of enjoying life
-since he has imagined he must have so much to enjoy it with. Let a man
-live for two passions, and he is happy. Let him have twenty ways of
-amusing himself, and he lowers his capacity for enjoying any one in the
-endeavor to patronize them all.”
-
-Hermia remembered her experience with Cryder. He had talked very
-beautifully of the past—once. Life was making her skeptical. “Have you
-written any of your book?” she asked.
-
-“Yes, it is nearly done.”
-
-“Would you let me see it? Or is that asking too much? But—that period
-of history particularly interests me. I used to live in it.”
-
-“Did you? I should be very glad to have you read my effusions; but
-wading through manuscript is a frightful bore.”
-
-“I have waded through a good deal,” said Hermia, briefly. “Bring it
-to-morrow night. No,”—she had suddenly recollected that the next was
-Cryder’s evening. “Bring it the next night—no—the next. Will that do?”
-
-“Yes,” said Quintard. “I will afflict you, with great pleasure, if you
-will let me.”
-
-When they went down-stairs, Mrs. Dykman wrapped Hermia’s furs more
-closely about her. “I hope, my dear,” she murmured, “you do not mind
-that the whole house is talking about you. Do you know that Mr. Quintard
-is the only man whom you have condescended to notice during the entire
-evening?”
-
-“No?” said Hermia. “I had not thought about it. No, I don’t mind. A
-woman is not happy until she is talked about—just a little, you know.
-When her position is secure, it makes her so picturesque—quite
-individual.”
-
-“You will be engaged before the week is over. You will be accused of
-having deserted Mr. Cryder, and entered upon a more desperate flirtation
-yet. The ultra caustic will remember Grettan Quintard’s reputation.”
-
-“You can deny the engagement,” said Hermia.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XXV.
-
-
- THE POWER OF PERSONALITY.
-
-A few evenings later Quintard came with a portion of his book, which he
-had had type-written for her. While he amused himself with the many rare
-volumes on the library shelves, Hermia read the introduction and the
-four tales with equal interest and astonishment. They had a vital power
-which seemed to grip her mind as with a palpable hand and hold it until
-she had read the last of the sheets. Quintard had reproduced the style
-and spirit of the age with remarkable fidelity—the unbridled passions,
-the coarse wit, the stirring deeds of valor. He made no attempt at
-delicate pathos or ideality. When a man suffered, he raged like a
-wounded boar; every phase of his nature was portrayed in the rough.
-
-Hermia dropped the sheets into her lap and gazed into the fire. Her
-opinion of Quintard had quite changed. Why did she not love him? But she
-did not. He attracted her mentally, and his character fascinated her,
-but stone could not be colder than her heart. Did he go out of the room
-that moment never to return, she would not care, save that a promising
-friend would be lost. He had come too late. She no longer possessed the
-power to love. She shrugged her shoulders. They could be friends; that
-was quite enough.
-
-Her comments were very flattering and discriminating, and he was much
-gratified, and gave her a general idea of the rest of the book. She had
-one or two books that might help him, and she promised to send them to
-his rooms.
-
-“You are a remarkable mixture,” she said, in conclusion; “at times you
-seem almost prosaic, altogether matter-of-fact. When I first met you, I
-decided that you were commonplace.”
-
-“You will allow a man to have two sides, at least,” said Quintard,
-smiling. “I cannot always be walking on the ramparts of imagination. I
-enjoy being prosaic at intervals, and there are times when I delight to
-take a hammer and smash my ideals to atoms. I like to build a castle and
-raze it with a platitude, to create a goddess and paint wrinkles on her
-cheek, to go up among the gods and guy them into common mortals, to kiss
-a woman and smother passion with a jest.”
-
-“That is the brutality in your nature.”
-
-“Yes,” said Quintard, “I suppose that is it.”
-
-She watched him for a moment. He had taken a chair near her and was
-leaning forward looking at the fire, his elbow on his knee, his chin in
-the cup of his hand. His strong, clean-cut profile stood out like a
-bas-relief against the dark wood of the mantel. The squareness of his
-jaw and the thickness of his neck indicated the intense vitality of his
-organism; his thick, black mustache overshadowed a mouth heavy and
-determined; his dense, fine hair clung about a head of admirable lines;
-and his blue eyes were very dark and piercing. He had the long,
-clean-limbed, sinewy figure of a trained athlete, and there was not an
-ounce of superfluous flesh on it. He combined the best of the old
-world’s beauty with the best of the new, and Hermia looked at him with a
-curious mixture of national and personal pride.
-
-“I like brutality,” she said, abstractedly; “all the great men of the
-world had it.” She turned to him suddenly. “You look as if you always
-got whatever you made up your mind to have,” she said. “Do you?”
-
-“Yes,” he said, “usually.”
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XXVI.
-
-
- HERMIA HEARS THE TRUTH.
-
-He called one morning soon after and spent the entire day with her. He
-had finished the last of the stories and he read it to her. The tale was
-a tragic one, and had a wild, savage pathos in it. It brought the tears
-to her eyes, and at the climax she leaned forward with a gasp.
-
-“Oh, you can cry?” said Quintard.
-
-“It is only nervousness,” hastily. “I never do. I may have been able to
-once, but I no longer possess feeling of any sort. Don’t think that I am
-ridiculous and blasé; it is simply that I cannot take any personal
-interest in life. I have made the discovery that there is nothing in it
-a little sooner than most people—that is all.”
-
-“You are a little crazy,” said Quintard. “You will get over it.”
-
-The blood mounted to the roots of Hermia’s hair, and her eyes looked as
-fierce as if she were one of Quintard’s barbarians. She felt more anger
-than she cared to betray. No other man living would have dared make such
-a speech to her. Cryder would have humored her, and she had expected
-Quintard to be suitably impressed.
-
-“What did you say?” she demanded, with an effort at control.
-
-He looked at her unmoved. “You have a great many ridiculous notions
-about life,” he said. “In addition, you have less knowledge of yourself
-than any woman I have ever known. The two things combined have put your
-mind out of joint.”
-
-Hermia felt as if she were stifling. “I wonder you dare,” she said
-through her teeth.
-
-“Your point of view is all wrong,” he went on; “you see everything
-through glasses that do not fit your eyes. You are not fond of talking
-about yourself, but you have given me several opportunities to gather
-that. You think you have exhausted life, whereas you have not begun to
-live. You simply don’t even know what you are thinking about. You know
-less about the world than any woman of brain and opportunities I ever
-met in my life, and it is because you have deliberately blinded yourself
-by false and perverted views.”
-
-Hermia’s teeth were clinched and her bosom was heaving. “You may as well
-finish,” she said, in a voice ominously calm.
-
-“Just to mention one point. You have said you do not believe in
-matrimony—particularly when people love each other. I have had every
-experience with women that a romantic temperament can devise, so perhaps
-you will allow me to tell you that I have come to the conclusion that
-the only satisfactory relationship for a man and woman who love each
-other is matrimony. The very knowledge that conditions are temporary,
-acts as a check to love, and one is anxious to be off with one affair
-for the novelty of the next. Moreover, if human character is worth
-anything at all, it is worth its highest development. This, an irregular
-and passing union cannot accomplish; it needs the mutual duties and
-responsibilities and sacrifices of married life. If ever I really loved
-a woman I should ask her to marry me. You have got some absurd, romantic
-notions in your head about the charm and spice of an intrigue. Try it,
-and you will find it flatter than any matrimony you have ever seen or
-imagined.”
-
-Hermia, with a cry of rage, sprang from her chair and rushed from the
-room. She dropped her handkerchief in her flight, and Quintard went
-forward and picked it up. “She is ready to tear me bone from bone,” he
-thought; “but, if I have destroyed some of her illusions, I shall not
-mind.” He passed his hand tenderly over the handkerchief, then raised it
-suddenly to his lips. A wave of color rushed over his dark face, making
-it almost black. “She was superb in her wrath,” he muttered, unsteadily.
-
-He laid the handkerchief on the table and went back to his seat. After a
-time Hermia returned. She was very pale, and looked rather ashamed of
-herself. It was characteristic of her that she made no allusion to the
-past scene. She had a book in her hand. “I came across this in an old
-book-shop the other day,” she said. “I am fond of prowling about dusty
-shelves; I suppose I shall end by becoming a bibliomaniac. This is a
-collection of fragmentary verses which it is said the Crusaders used to
-sing at night on the battle-field. I thought you might use it.”
-
-Quintard looked as pleased as a boy. “It was very good of you to think
-of me,” he said impulsively, “and I shall make use of it. But tell me
-what you think of this last yarn.”
-
-“It is magnificent,” said Hermia; “I believe you are that rarest object
-in the history of the world—a poet.”
-
-“I have written miles of it, and have made some of the most beautiful
-bonfires in history.”
-
-Hermia laughed. “Could you never be consistently serious?”
-
-“Yes, I could,” said Quintard, briefly.
-
-Hermia looked at the door. “Higgins is coming to announce luncheon,” she
-said.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XXVII.
-
-
- FIVE POINTS OF VIEW.
-
-At five o’clock Mrs. Dykman, Helen Simms, and Cryder dropped in for a
-cup of tea, and Miss Starbruck came down-stairs.
-
-Quintard insisted that, in spite of Miss Starbruck’s open disapproval of
-him, she was his proudest conquest; and her abuse was certainly growing
-milder. She rarely failed to appear at these informal tea-drinkings;
-there was just enough of the worldly flavor about them to fascinate
-without frightening her; and it was noticeable that to whatever Quintard
-chose to say she listened with a marked and somewhat amusing interest.
-The poor old lady was no more proof against personal magnetism and the
-commanding manliness which was Quintard’s most aggressive characteristic
-than her less rigid sisters. Quintard threatened to marry her and
-deprive Hermia of her only natural protector, but Miss Starbruck was as
-yet innocent of his designs.
-
-“This is quite a family party,” said Helen; “let us draw our chairs
-close to the fire and warm ourselves with brotherly affection; it is so
-beastly cold out. But by this great log fire one thinks himself in the
-hall of an old English castle; and the streets of New York are not. I
-feel almost romantic.”
-
-“Let us tell stories,” suggested Cryder.
-
-“No,” replied Helen, promptly, “I don’t want to listen to long stories.
-You would tell your own, and I can’t understand dialect. Besides, I want
-to talk about myself—I beg that prerogative of your sex. As this is a
-family party, I am going to tell my woes and ask advice. I want to get
-married! Shall I, or shall I not?”
-
-“Who is the man?” asked Cryder. “How can we advise until we know whether
-he is worthy to buy your bonnets?”
-
-“I have not decided. The man is not much of a point. I simply want to be
-married that I may be free,” and she heaved a sigh.
-
-“Free of what?” asked Hermia, sarcastically. “Of freedom?”
-
-“Oh, this is not freedom, my dear. A girl always has to be chaperoned. A
-married woman chaperones. Oh, the difference!”
-
-“But where do you propose to keep the future Mr. Helen Simms?” asked
-Cryder, laughing.
-
-“At his club, or in a rose-colored boudoir. Mine will be blue.”
-
-“Helen Simms! you are the most immoral young woman I ever—ever——.”
-The wrathful voice broke down, and all turned to Miss Starbruck with
-amused sympathy.
-
-“Are you not yet used to our wicked Gotham?” asked Quintard, taking a
-chair beside her.
-
-“No!” Miss Starbruck had recovered her voice. “And I think it abominable
-that the holy institution of matrimony should be so defamed.”
-
-“Oh, dear Miss Starbruck,” cried Helen, good-naturedly. “It is time you
-left Nantucket. That primitive saying has long since been paraphrased
-into ‘the unholy institution of whithersoever thou goest, in the other
-direction will I run.’ And a jolly good revolution it is, too. Please do
-not call me immoral, dear Miss Starbruck. You and I were born on
-different planets, that is all.”
-
-“Marriage is a necessary evil,” said Mrs. Dykman’s soft, monotonous
-voice. “You have done well to defer it as long as possible, but you are
-wise to contemplate a silken halter. No woman’s position is established,
-nor has she any actual importance until she has a husband. But marry
-nothing under a million, my dear. Take the advice of one who knows;
-money is the one thing that makes life worth living. Everything else
-goes—youth, beauty, love. Money—if you take care that does not go
-too—consoles for the loss of all, because it buys distractions,
-amusement, power, change. It plates ennui and crystallizes tears to
-diamonds. It smoothes wrinkles and keeps health in the cheek. It buys
-friends and masks weakness and sin. You are young, but the young
-generation is wiser than the old; my advice, I feel sure, will not be
-thrown away.”
-
-“And this!” exclaimed Miss Starbruck, hoarsely; “this is what life has
-come to! I am an old maid, and have done with all thought of marriage;
-but I am not ashamed to say that many years ago I loved a young man, and
-had he lived would have married him, and been a true and faithful and
-loving wife. That a woman should marry from any other motive seems to me
-scandalous and criminal.”
-
-“What do truth and duty mean?” demanded Hermia scornfully. “Monotony and
-an ennui worse than death. You are happy that you live your married life
-in imagination, and that your lover died before even courtship had begun
-to pall. Still”—she shrugged her shoulders as she thought of
-Bessie—“perhaps you wouldn’t have minded it; some people don’t.”
-
-“No,” said her aunt; “I wouldn’t have minded it. I would have
-appreciated it.”
-
-Hermia turned to her with a curious glance. “How differently people are
-made,” she said with a sigh. “The monotony of married life would drive
-me mad.”
-
-Quintard rose and rested his elbow on the mantel. “Did it ever occur to
-you,” he said, “that monotony is not an absolutely indispensable
-ingredient of married life?”
-
-Hermia shrugged her shoulders. “It ruins more wedded lives than jealousy
-or bad temper.”
-
-“True; but if married life is monotonous, it is largely the fault of
-those who suffer from the monotony. It is true that the average human
-animal is commonplace; therefore monotony in the domestic relations of
-such men and women follows as a matter of course. They suffer the
-consequences without the power to avert them. Those who walk on the
-plane above, shiver under the frozen smile of the great god Bore as
-well—but they can avert it. The ennui that kills love is born of
-dispelled illusions, of the death of the dramatic principle, which is
-buried at the foot of the altar. When a man is attempting to win a woman
-he is full of surprises which fascinate her; he never tarries a moment
-too long; he is always planning something to excite her interest; he
-watches her every mood and coddles it, or breaks it down for the
-pleasure of teaching her the strength of his personality; he does not
-see her too often; above all, he is never off guard. Then, if he wins
-her, during the engagement each kiss is an event; and, another point, it
-is the future of which they always talk.”
-
-“How is it after marriage? We all know.”
-
-Cryder gave an unpleasant little laugh, common to him when some one else
-had held the floor too long. “Taking your own theory as a premise,” he
-said, “I should say that the best plan was not to get married at all.
-People who marry are doomed to fall between the time-honored lines.
-Better they live together without the cloying assurance of ties; then,
-stimulus is not wanting.”
-
-“That is all very well for people who are independent of the world’s
-opinion,” said Mrs. Dykman, “but what are they to do who happen to have
-a yearning for respectable society?”
-
-Cryder shrugged his shoulders. “They must be content with water in their
-claret. You can’t get intoxicated and dilute your wine, both.”
-
-“I deny that,” said Quintard. “I believe that matrimony can be made more
-exciting and interesting than liaison, open or concealed, because it
-lacks the vulgarity; it can be made champagne instead of beer.”
-
-“You ought to know,” murmured Mrs. Dykman.
-
-“Mr. Quintard!” exclaimed Miss Starbruck; “I am glad to hear you say
-that, although I do not think it is a very proper subject to discuss
-before both men and women.”
-
-“My dear Miss Starbruck,” broke in Helen, with a laugh; “this is the
-progressive nineteenth century, and we are people of the world—the
-wild, wicked world. We are not afraid to discuss anything, particularly
-in this house, where the most primitive and natural woman in the world
-is queen. It has come to be a sort of Palace of Truth. We don’t offend
-the artistic sense, however.”
-
-“Miss Simms has been right more than once to-day,” said Quintard. “She
-said a moment ago that one must be married to be free. May I venture the
-assertion that, in the present state of society, the highest human
-freedom is found in the bonds of matrimony alone?”
-
-“Explain your paradox,” said Hermia, who had made no comment to
-Quintard’s remarks.
-
-“It is easily explained. I say nothing whatever of passing fancies,
-infatuations, passions, which are best disposed of in a temporary union.
-I refer to love alone. When a man loves a woman he wants her constant
-companionship, with no restraint but that exercised by his own judicious
-will and art. He wants to live with her, to travel with her, to be able
-to seek her at all hours, to follow his own will, unquestioned and
-untrammeled. This, outside of conventional bonds, is impossible without
-scandal, and no man who loves a woman will have her lightly spoken of if
-he can help it. But let the priest read his formula, and the man so
-bound is monarch of his own desires, and can snap his fingers at the
-world. I have neither patience nor respect for the man who must have the
-stimulus of uncertainty to feed his love. He is a poor, weak,
-unimaginative creature, who is dependent upon conditions for that which
-he should find in his own character.”
-
-“I never expected to hear you talk like this, Mr. Quintard!” exclaimed
-Miss Starbruck, “for you have been a very immoral man.”
-
-Quintard looked at her with an amused smile. “Why immoral, Miss
-Starbruck?”
-
-“You have—well, people say——” stammered poor Miss Starbruck, and then
-broke down.
-
-Mrs. Dykman came to the rescue. “Miss Starbruck means that you have
-lived with a number of women and have not taken any particular pains to
-hide the fact.”
-
-“Is that immoral? I think not. I have lived with no woman who had
-anything to lose, and I have lived with no woman who was not my equal
-intellectually. Companionship was quite as much an object as passion. I
-never took a woman out of the streets and hung jewels upon her and
-adored her for her empty beauty, and with a certain class of women I
-have never exchanged a dozen words since my callow youth. Furthermore, I
-never won a woman’s affections from her husband. If I ever got them he
-had lost them first. Therefore, I protest against being called immoral.”
-
-“If you want to go into the question of moral ethics,” said Cryder, “you
-cannot plead guiltless altogether of immorality. In openly living with a
-woman who is not your wife you outrage the conventions of the community
-and set it a bad example. It may be argued that you do less harm than
-those who pursue the sort of life you let alone; but the _positive_ harm
-is there.”
-
-All looked at Quintard, wondering how he would reply. Even Hermia felt
-that he was driven into a corner.
-
-“The question is,” replied Quintard, slowly, “What is morality? The
-world has many standards, from that of the English Government to that of
-the African barbarian, who follows his instincts, yet who, curiously
-enough, is in all respects more of a villain than his artificial
-brother. That point, however, we will not discuss. A man’s standard, of
-course, is determined by the community in which he lives. We will
-consider him first in relation to himself. Man is given a temperament
-which varies chiefly according to his physical strength, and tastes
-which are distinctly individual. And he not only is a different man
-after the experiences of each successive decade, but he frequently waits
-long for the only woman for whom he is capable of feeling that peculiar
-and overwhelming quality of love which demands that he shall make her
-his wife. But in the mean time he cannot go altogether companionless,
-and he meets many women with whom life is by no means unennobling. As to
-the community, I deny that he sets it a bad example. It is a wiser, more
-educating, and more refined life than insensate love-making to every
-pretty weak woman who comes along, or than associations which degrade a
-man’s higher nature and give him not a grain of food for thought. If
-more men, until ready to marry, spent their lives in the manner which I
-have endeavored to defend, there would be less weariness of life, less
-drinking, less excess, less vice of all sorts.”
-
-Miss Starbruck shuddered, but felt that the conversation had gone out of
-her depth, and made no reply. Hermia looked at Quintard with a feeling
-of unconscious pride. Until he finished speaking, she did not realize
-how she would hate to have him beaten.
-
-Cryder rose and began walking up and down the room. “When you argue,” he
-said fretfully, “I always feel as if you were hammering me about my
-ears. You have such a way of pounding through a discussion! One never
-knows until the next day whether you are right or whether you have
-simply overwhelmed one by the force of your vitality. Personally,
-however, I do not agree with you, and for the same reason that I would
-never marry; I dislike responsibilities.”
-
-Quintard gave him a glance of contempt, under which Hermia shrank as if
-a lash had cut her shoulders; but before he could reply Helen rushed to
-the front. “And all this discussion has come out of my poor little bid
-for sympathy and advice!” she cried. “You have frightened me to death! I
-am afraid of the very word matrimony with all your analysis and
-philosophy. To me it was a simple proposition: ‘Marry and chaperon;
-don’t marry, and be chaperoned.’ Now I feel that, if a man proposes to
-me, I must read Darwin and Spencer before I answer. I refuse to listen
-to another word. Mrs. Dykman, I am going home; let me drive you over.”
-
-They all went in a few moments, and Hermia was left alone with her
-reflections.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XXVIII.
-
-
- TWO HISTORIES ARE ALMOST FINISHED.
-
-Hermia saw a great deal of Quintard. They walked together, they rode
-together, and circumstances frequently forced them into each other’s
-society for hours at a time. She liked him more with every interview,
-but she did not feel a throb of love for him. The snow on her nature’s
-volcano was deep as the ashes which buried Pompeii.
-
-He had many opportunities to put his wearing qualities to the test. Once
-they met at a fashionable winter rendezvous in the country. The other
-women were of the Helen Simms type; the rest of the men belonged to the
-Winston brotherhood. For the greater part of four days Hermia and
-Quintard devoted themselves exclusively to each other. When they were
-not riding across the country or rambling through the windy woods, they
-sat in the library and told stories by the fire.
-
-One day they had wandered far into the woods and come upon a hemlock
-glen, down one side of which tumbled melting snow over great jutting
-rocks that sprang from the mountain side. Quintard and Hermia climbed to
-a ledge that overhung one of the rocky platforms and sat down. About and
-above them rose the forest, but the wind was quiet; there was no sound
-but the dull roar of the cataract. A more romantic spot was not in
-America, but Quintard could not have been more matter-of-fact had he
-been in a street-car. He had never betrayed any feeling he may have had
-for her by a flash of his eye. He discussed with her subjects dangerous
-and tender, but always with the cold control of the impersonal analyst.
-
-He smoked for a few moments in silence and then said abruptly: “Don’t
-imagine that I am going to discuss religion with you; it is a question
-which does not interest me at all. But do you believe in the immortality
-of the soul?”
-
-“No,” said Hermia.
-
-“Why not?”
-
-Hermia lifted her shoulders: “I have never thought agnosticism needed
-defense.”
-
-“Agnosticism is the religion of the intellectual, of course. But I have
-some private reasons for going a step beyond agnosticism, and believing
-in the persistence of personality. Do you want to hear them?”
-
-“Yes,” said Hermia, “but it all comes down to the same proposition.
-Religion has its stronghold in Ego the Great. _La vie, c’est moi!_ I am,
-therefore must ever be! Now and forever! World without end!”
-
-“I refuse to be snubbed beforehand. Why are children so frequently the
-ancestors of their family’s talent? When heredity cannot account for
-genius, what better explanation than that of the re-embodiment of an
-unquenchable individuality? The second reason is a more sentimental one.
-Why is a man never satisfied until he meets the woman he really loves,
-and why are his instincts so keen and sure when he does meet her? Why,
-also, does he so often dwell with the ideal of her before he sees her in
-material form?”
-
-Hermia felt herself paling, but she exclaimed impatiently: “Don’t talk
-to me of ideals—those poor, pale photographs of ourselves, who have
-neither mind nor will nor impulse; who jump out like puppets as the
-strings are pulled; who respond to every mood and grin to every smile!
-They are born of the supreme egoism of human nature, which admits no
-objective influence to any world of its own creating—an egoism which
-demands vengeance for the humiliation of spirit one is called upon to
-endure in the world of men. Your other arguments were good, however. I
-like them, although I will not discuss them until you have further
-elaborated. In the mean time solve another problem. What is the reason
-that, when a woman falls in love, she immediately, if a believer, has an
-increase of religious feeling; if a non-believer, she has a desire to
-believe, so that she may pray? Sentimentality? The softening of her
-nature under the influence of love? The general awakening of her
-emotional possibilities?”
-
-“Neither—or all, indirectly. She is not drawn to God in the least. She
-is drawn to the idealized abstraction of her lover, who, in the mists of
-her white-heated imagination, assumes the lineaments of the being most
-exalted by tradition. If there were a being more exalted still than God,
-her lover’s phantom would be re-christened with his name instead. It is
-to her lover that she prays—the intermediate being is a pretty
-fiction—and she revels in prayer, because it gives her a dreamy and
-sensuous nearness to her lover.”
-
-Hermia sprang to her feet and paced the narrow platform with rapid
-steps. “It is well I have no ‘pretty fictions,’” she said, “you would
-shatter them to splinters.”
-
-He rose also. “No,” he said, “I would never shatter any of your ideals.
-Such as you believe in and I do not, I will never discuss with you.”
-
-Hermia stood still and looked away from him and through the hemlock
-forest, with its life outstretched above and its death rotting below.
-The shadows were creeping about it like ghosts of the dead bracken
-beneath their feet. The mist was rolling over the mountain and down the
-cataract; it lay like a soft, thin blanket on the hurrying waters.
-Hermia drew closer to Quintard and looked up into his face.
-
-“Do you believe,” she said, “that perfect happiness can be—even when
-affinities meet?”
-
-“Not perfect, because not uninterrupted,” he replied, “except in those
-rare cases where a man and woman, born for each other, have met early in
-youth, before thought or experience had formed the character of either.
-When—as almost always happens—they do not meet until each is incased
-in the armor of their separate and perfected individualities, no matter
-how united they may become, there must be hours and days of terrible
-spiritual loneliness—there must be certain sides of their natures that
-can never touch. But”—he bent his flushed face to hers and his voice
-shook—“there are moments—there are hours—when barriers are of mist,
-when duality is forgotten. Such hours, isolated from time and the
-world——”
-
-She broke from him as from an invisible embrace and stood on the edge of
-a rock. She gave a little, rippling laugh that was caught and lost in
-the rush and thunder of the waters. “Your theories are fascinating,” she
-cried, “but this unknown cataract is more so. I should like to stand
-here for an hour and watch it, were not these rocks so slippery——”
-
-Quintard turned his head. Then he leaped down the path beneath the
-ledge. Hermia had disappeared. He was about to swing himself out into
-the cataract when he staggered and leaned against the rock; his heart
-contracted as if there were fingers of steel about it. With a mighty
-resolution, he overcame the physical weakness which followed in the wake
-of the momentary pain, and, planting his feet on one of the broad stones
-over which the torrent fell, he set his shoulder against a projecting
-rock and looked upward. Hermia lay on a shelf above; the force of the
-cataract was feebler at its edges and had not swept her down. Quintard
-crawled slowly up, his feet slipping on the slimy rocks, only saving
-himself from being precipitated into the narrowing body of the torrent
-below by clinging to the roots and branches that projected from the
-ledges. He reached Hermia; she was unconscious, and it was well that he
-was a strong man. He took her in his arms and went down the rocks. When
-he stepped on to the earth again his face was white, and he breathed
-heavily. “My heart beats as if I were a woman,” he muttered impatiently,
-“what is the matter with me?”
-
-He laid Hermia on the ground, and for a moment was compelled to rest
-beside her. Then he aroused himself and bent anxiously over her. She had
-had a severe fall; it was a wonder her brains had not been dashed out.
-He lifted her and held her with her body sloping from feet to head. She
-struggled to consciousness with an agonized gasp. She opened her eyes,
-but did not appear to see him, and, turning her face to the torrent,
-made a movement to crawl to it. Quintard caught her in his arms and
-stood her on her feet.
-
-“What are you doing?” he asked roughly.
-
-She put her hand to her head. “I like to watch it, but the rocks are so
-slippery,” she said confusedly, yet with a gleam of cunning in her
-shadowed eyes.
-
-Quintard caught her by both shoulders and shook her. “My God!” he
-exclaimed, “did you do it purposely?”
-
-The blood rushed to her head and washed the fog from her brain. “You are
-crazy,” she said; “let us go home.”
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XXIX.
-
-
- AN EPOCH-MAKING DEPARTURE.
-
-A woman never moralizes until she has committed an immoral act. From the
-moment she voluntarily accepts it until the moment she casts it aside,
-she may do distasteful duty to the letter, but she does it mechanically.
-The laws and canons are laid down, and she follows them without
-analysis, however rebelliously. She may long for the forbidden as
-consistently as she accepts her yoke, whether the yoke be of untempted
-girlhood or hated matrimony; but the longing serves to deepen her
-antipathy to bonds; she sees no beauty in average conditions. After she
-has plucked the apple and eaten it raw, skin, core and all, and is
-suffering from the indigestion thereof, she is enabled to analytically
-compare it with such fruits as do not induce dyspepsia.
-
-Although Hermia was far from acknowledging that she loved Quintard, she
-allowed him occasionally to reign in her imagination, and had more than
-one involuntary, abstract, but tender interview with him. This, she
-assured herself, was purely speculative, and in the way of objective
-amusement, like the theater or the opera. When she found that she
-thought of him always as her husband she made no protest; he was too
-good for anything less. Nor, she decided, had she met him earlier and
-been able to love him, would she have been content with any more
-imperfect union.
-
-Cryder still came with more or less regularity. There were brief,
-frantic moments, as when she had sought death in the torrent; but on the
-whole she was too indifferent to break with him. Her life was already
-ruined; what mattered her actions? Moreover, habit is a tremendous
-force, and he had a certain hold over her, a certain fascination, with
-which the physical had nothing to do.
-
-After she had known Quintard about two months she found herself free.
-Cryder, in truth, was quite as tired as herself. Ennui was in his
-tideless veins, and, moreover, the time had come to add another flower
-to his herbarium. But he did not wish to break with Hermia until his
-time came to leave the city. If she had loved him, it might have been
-worth while to hurt her; but, as even his egoism could not persuade him
-that she gave him more than temperate affection, he would not risk the
-humiliation of being laughed at.
-
-One evening he told her that he must go South the following week and
-remain several months. His dialect was growing rusty, and the public
-would expect another novel from him in the coming spring. He hated to
-say good-bye to her, but his muse claimed his first and highest duty.
-Hermia felt as one who comes out of a room full of smoke—she wanted to
-draw a long breath and throw back her head. She replied very politely,
-however—they were always very polite—that she should miss him and look
-forward to his return. Neither would avow that this was the end of the
-matter, but each was devoutly thankful that the other was not a fool.
-
-Cryder looked melancholy and handsome when he came to say good-bye. He
-had on extremely becoming traveling clothes, and his skin and eyes had
-their accustomed clearness. He bade Hermia a tender farewell, and his
-eyes looked resigned and sad. Then an abstracted gaze passed into them,
-as if his spirit had floated upward to a plane far removed from common
-affection.
-
-Hermia had much ado to keep her mouth from curling. She remembered what
-Quintard had once said of him: that he always wanted to throw him on a
-table to see if he would ring. Bah! what a _poseur_ he was! Then she
-mentally shrugged her shoulders. His egoism had its value; he had never
-noticed the friendship which existed between her and Quintard. Had he
-been a jealous man he would have been insufferable.
-
-After he had gone he seemed to glide out of her life—out of the past as
-of the present. She found herself barely able to recall him, his
-features, his characteristics. For a long time she never thought of him
-unless some one mentioned his name, and then she wondered if he had not
-been the hero of a written sketch rather than of an actual episode.
-
-Whether it was owing to Cryder’s removal or to Quintard’s influence, she
-could not tell, but she found herself becoming less blasé. Her spirits
-were lighter, people interested her more, life seemed less prosaic. She
-asked Quintard once what it meant, and he told her, with his usual
-frankness, that it was the spring. This offended her, and she did not
-speak for ten minutes.
-
-On another occasion he roused her to wrath. He told her one day that on
-the night he met her he had been impressed with a sense of unreality
-about her; and, acting on a sudden impulse, she told him the history of
-her starved and beautiless girlhood. When she finished she expected many
-comments, but Quintard merely put another log of wood on the fire and
-remarked:
-
-“That is all very interesting, but I am warned that the dinner-hour
-approaches. Farewell, I will see you at Mrs. Dykman’s this evening.”
-
-Hermia looked at the fire for some time after he had gone. She was
-thankful that fate had arranged matters in such wise that she was not to
-spend her life with Quintard. He could be, at times, the most
-disagreeable man she had ever known, and there was not a grain of
-sympathy in his nature. And, yes, he _was_ prosaic!
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XXX.
-
-
- THROUGH THE SNOW.
-
-Two days later Hermia went to a large dinner, and Quintard took her in.
-She was moody and absent. She felt nervous, she said, and he need not be
-surprised if he found her very cross. Quintard told her to be as cross
-as she liked. He had his reasons for encouraging her in her moods. After
-the dinner was over she wandered through the rooms like a restless
-ghost. Finally she turned abruptly to Quintard. “Take me home,” she
-said; “I shall stifle if I stay in this house any longer. It is like a
-hot-house.”
-
-“But what will Mrs. Dykman say?”
-
-“I do not care what she says. She is not ready to go, and I won’t stay
-any longer. I will go without saying anything to her about it.”
-
-“Very well. There will be comment, but I will see if they have a
-telephone and order a cab.”
-
-“I won’t go in a cab. I want to walk.”
-
-“But it is snowing.”
-
-“I like to walk in the snow.”
-
-Quintard thought it best to let her have her way. Moreover, a walk
-through the snow with her would be a very pleasant thing. He hunted up a
-housemaid and borrowed a pair of high overshoes. Hermia had on a short
-gown; she pulled the fur-lined hood of her long wrap about her head,
-Quintard put on the overshoes, and they managed to get out of the house
-unnoticed. The snow was falling, but the wind lingered afar on the
-borders of the storm.
-
-“You had better let me call a cab.”
-
-“I will _not_ drive,” replied Hermia; and Quintard shrugged his
-shoulders and offered his arm.
-
-The walk was not a long one under ordinary circumstances; the house at
-which the dinner had been given was in Gramercy Park; but, with a
-slippery pavement and snow-stars in one’s eyes, each block is a mile.
-Quintard had an umbrella, but Hermia would not let him raise it. She
-liked to throw back her head and watch the snow in its tumbling,
-scurrying, silent fall. It lay deep in the long, narrow street, and it
-blotted out the tall, stern houses with a merry, baffling curtain of
-wee, white storm-imps. Now and again a cab flashed its lantern like a
-will-o’-the-wisp.
-
-Hermia made Quintard stop under one of the electric lamps. It poured its
-steady beams through the storm for a mile and more, and in it danced the
-sparkling crystals in infinite variety of form and motion. About the
-pathway pressed the soft, unlustrous army, jealous of their transformed
-comrades, like stars that sigh to spring from the crowded milky way.
-Down that luminous road hurried the tiny radiant shapes, like coming
-souls to the great city, hungry for life.
-
-Hermia clung to Quintard, her eyes shining out of the dark.
-
-“Summer and the country have nothing so beautiful as this,” she
-whispered. “I feel as if we were on a deserted planet, and of hateful
-modern life there was none. I cannot see a house.”
-
-“I see several,” said Quintard.
-
-Hermia gave a little exclamation of disgust, but struggled onward.
-“Sometimes I hate you,” she said. “You never respond to my moods.”
-
-“Oh, yes, I do—to your real moods. You often think you are sentimental,
-when, should I take you up, you would find me a bore and change the
-subject. You will get sentimental enough some day, but you are not ready
-for it yet.”
-
-“Yes? You still cling to that ridiculous idea that I shall some day fall
-in love, I suppose.”
-
-“I do. And how you will go to pieces.”
-
-“That is purest nonsense. I wish it were not.”
-
-“Have you got that far? But we will not argue the matter. Your mood
-to-night, as I suggested before, is not a sentimental one. You are
-extremely cross. I don’t know but I like that better. It would be hard
-for me to be sentimental in the streets of New York.”
-
-Hermia rather liked being bullied by him at times. But if she could only
-shake that effortless self-control!
-
-They walked a block in silence. “Are you very susceptible to beauty?”
-she asked suddenly.
-
-Quintard laughed. “I am afraid I am. Still, I will do myself the justice
-to say that it has no power to hold me if there is nothing else. Beauty
-by itself is a poor thing; combined with several other
-things—intellect, soul, passion—it becomes one of the sweetest and
-most powerful aids to communion.”
-
-“Why do you think so much of passion?” she demanded. “You haven’t any
-yourself.”
-
-They passed under a lamp at the moment, and a ray of light fell on
-Quintard’s face, to which Hermia had lifted her eyes. The color sprang
-to it, and his eyes flashed. He bent his head until she shrank under the
-strong, angry magnetism of his gaze. “It is time you opened your eyes,”
-he said harshly, “and learned to know one man from another. And it is
-time you began to realize what you have to expect.” He bent his face a
-little closer. “It will not frighten you, though,” he said. And then he
-raised his head and carefully piloted her across the street.
-
-Hermia made no reply. She opened her lips as if her lungs needed more
-air. Something was humming in her head; she could not think. She looked
-up through a light-path into the dark, piling billows of the vaporous,
-storm-writhed ocean. Then she caught Quintard’s arm as if she were on an
-eminence and afraid of falling.
-
-“Are you cold?” he asked, drawing her closer.
-
-“Yes,” said Hermia. “I wish we were home. How thick the snow is! Things
-are in my eyes.”
-
-Quintard stopped and brushed the little crystals off her lashes. Then
-they went on, slipping sometimes, but never falling. Quintard was very
-sure-footed. The snow covered them with a garment like soft white fur,
-the darkness deepened, and neither made further attempt at conversation.
-Quintard had all he could do to keep his bearings, and began to wish
-that he had not let Hermia have her way; but she trudged along beside
-him with a blind sort of confidence new to her.
-
-After a time he gave an exclamation of relief. “We are within a couple
-of blocks of your house,” he said. “We shall soon be home. Be
-careful—the crossing is very slip——. Ah!”
-
-She had stepped off the curbstone too quickly, her foot slipped, and she
-made a wild slide forward, dragging Quintard with her. He threw his arm
-around her, and caught his balance on the wing. In a second he was
-squarely planted on both feet, but he did not release Hermia. He wound
-his arms about her, pressing her closer, closer, his breath coming
-quickly. The ice-burdened storm might have been the hot blast of a
-furnace. He did not kiss her, his lips were frozen; but her hood had
-fallen back and he pressed his face into the fragrant gold of her hair.
-
-He loosened his hold suddenly, and, drawing her arm through his, hurried
-through the street. They were at Hermia’s door in a few moments, and
-when the butler opened it she turned to him hesitatingly.
-
-“You will come in and get warm, and ring for a cab?” she asked.
-
-“Yes,” he said, “I will go in for a moment.”
-
-They went into the library, and Quintard lit all the burners. He touched
-a bell and told the butler to bring some sherry and call a cab.
-
-When the sherry came he drank a glass with her, and entertained her
-until the cab arrived, with an account of a wild storm in which he had
-once found himself on the mountains of Colorado. When the bell rang she
-stood up and held out her hand with a smile.
-
-“Good-luck to you,” she said. “I hope you will get home before morning.”
-
-He took her hand, then dropped it and put both his own about her face,
-his wrists meeting under her chin. “Good-night,” he said softly. “Go to
-those sovereign domains of yours, where the castles are built of the
-clouds of sunset, and the sea thunders with longing and love and pain of
-desire. I have been with you there always; I always shall be;” and then
-he let his hands fall, and went quickly from the room.
-
-Hermia waited until the front door had closed, and then she ran up to
-her room as if hobgoblins were in pursuit.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XXXI.
-
-
- THE DYKMAN REPRIMAND.
-
-While Hermia was sitting in the library the next day in a very
-unenviable frame of mind, the door opened and Mrs. Dykman came in.
-
-“Hermia,” she said, after she had disposed herself on one of the severe,
-high-backed chairs, “it is quite time for you to adopt some slight
-regard for the conventionalities. You are wealthy, and strong in your
-family name; but there is a limit. The world is not a thing you can hold
-in the hollow of your hand or crush under your foot. The manner in which
-you left Mrs. Le Roy’s house last night was scandalous. What do you
-suppose the consequences will be?” Her cold, even tones never varied,
-but they had the ice-breath of the Arctic in them.
-
-“Are people talking?” asked Hermia.
-
-“Talking? They are shrieking! It is to be hoped, for your own sake, that
-you are going to marry Grettan Quintard, and that you will let me
-announce the engagement at once.”
-
-Hermia sprang to her feet, overturning her chair. She had a book in her
-hand, and she flung it across the room. Her eyes were blazing and her
-face was livid. “Don’t ever dare mention that man’s name to me again!”
-she cried. “I hate him! I hate him! And don’t bring me any more tales
-about what people are saying. I don’t care what they say! I scorn them
-all! What are they but a set of jibbering automatons? One year has made
-me loathe the bloodless, pulseless, colorless, artificial thing you call
-society. Those people whose names and position each bows down to in the
-other are not human beings! they are but a handful of fungi on the great
-plant of humanity! If they were wrenched from their roots and crushed
-out of life to-morrow, their poor, little, miserable, self-satisfied
-numbers would not be missed. Of what value are they in the scheme of
-existence save to fatten and puff in the shade of a real world like the
-mushroom and the toadstool under an oak? They are not _alive_ like the
-great world of real men; not one of them ever had a strong, real,
-healthy, animal impulse in his life. Even their little sins are
-artificial, and owe their faint, evanescent promptings to vanity or
-ennui. I hate their wretched little aims and ambitions, their well-bred
-scuffling for power in the eyes of each other—_power_—Heaven save the
-mark! They work as hard, those poor midgets, for recognition among the
-few hundred people who have ever heard of them, as a statesman does for
-the admiration of his country! And yet if the whole tribe were melted
-down into one soul they would not make an ambition big enough to carry
-its result to the next generation. A year and I shall have forgotten
-every name on my visiting-list. Great God! that you should think I care
-for them.”
-
-Mrs. Dykman rose to her feet and drew her furs about her. “I do not
-pretend to understand you,” she said. “Fortunately for myself, my lot
-has been cast among ordinary women. And as I am a part of the world for
-which you have so magnificent a contempt, one of the midgets for whom
-you have so fine a scorn, I imagine you will care to see as little of me
-in the future as I of you.”
-
-She was walking majestically down the room when Hermia sprang forward,
-and, throwing her arms about her, burst into a storm of tears. “Oh,
-don’t be angry with me!” she cried. “Don’t! Don’t! I am so miserable
-that I don’t know what I am saying. I believe I am half crazy.”
-
-Mrs. Dykman drew her down on a sofa. “What is the trouble?” she asked.
-“Tell me.”
-
-“There is nothing in particular,” said Hermia. “I am just unstrung. I
-feel like a raft in the middle of an ocean. I am disgusted with life. It
-must be because I am not well. I am sure that is it. There is nothing
-else. Oh, Aunt Frances, take me to Europe.”
-
-“Very well,” said Mrs. Dykman; “we will go if you think that traveling
-will cure you. But I cannot go for at least five weeks. Will that do?”
-
-“Yes,” said Hermia; “I suppose it will have to.”
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XXXII.
-
-
- FUTURITY.
-
-A few days later Hermia had a singular experience. Bessie’s youngest
-child, her only boy, died. Hermia carried her sister from the room as
-the boy breathed his last, and laid her on a bed. As Bessie lay sobbing
-and moaning, sometimes wailing aloud, she seemed suddenly to fade from
-her sister’s vision. Hermia was alone, where she could not tell, in a
-room whose lineaments were too shadowy to define. Even her own outlines,
-seen as in a mirror held above, were blurred. Of one thing only was she
-sharply conscious: she was writhing in mortal agony—agony not of the
-body, but of the spirit. The cause she did not grasp, but the effect was
-a suffering as exquisite and as torturing as that of vitriol poured upon
-bare nerves. The insight lasted only a few seconds, but it was so real
-that she almost screamed aloud. Then she drifted back to the present and
-bent over her sister. But her face was white. In that brief interval her
-inner vision had pierced the depths of her nature, and what it saw there
-made her shudder.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XXXIII.
-
-
- CHAOS.
-
-She began to hate Cryder with a mortal hatred. When he left her he had
-flown down the perspective of her past, but now he seemed to be crawling
-back—nearer—nearer—
-
-Had it not been for him she might have loved Quintard. But he had
-scraped the gloss from life. He had made love commonplace, vulgar. She
-felt a sort of moral nausea whenever she thought of love. What an ideal
-would love have been with Quintard in this house! There was a barbaric,
-almost savage element in his nature which made him seem a part of these
-rooms and of that Indian wilderness.
-
-And every nook and corner was eloquent of Cryder! Sometimes she thought
-she would take another house. But she asked herself: Of what use? She
-had nothing left to give Quintard, and her house was his delight. She no
-longer pretended to analyze herself or to speculate on the future. Once,
-when sitting alone by Bessie’s bed in the night, she had opened the door
-of her mental photograph gallery and glanced down the room to that
-great, bare plate at the end. It was bare no longer. On its surface was
-an impression—what, she did not pause to ascertain. She shut the door
-hurriedly and turned the key.
-
-At times all the evil in her nature was dominant. She dreaded hearing
-Quintard speak the word which would thrust her face to face with her
-future; but the temptation was strong to see the lightning flash in his
-eyes, to shake his silence as a rock shakes above the quivering earth.
-And Quintard kept his control because he saw that she was trying to
-tempt him, and he determined that he would not yield an inch until he
-was ready.
-
- * * * * *
-
-She made up her mind to go away from all memory of Cryder and live on
-some Mediterranean island with Quintard. She was not fit to be any man’s
-wife, and life could never be what it might have been; but at least she
-would have him, and she could not live without him. There were softer
-moments, when she felt poignant regret for the mistake of her past, when
-she had brief, fleeting longings for a higher life of duty, and of a
-love that was something more than intellectual companionship and
-possession.
-
-Quintard’s book came out and aroused a hot dispute. He was accused of
-coarseness and immorality on the one side, and granted originality and
-vigor on the other. The ultra-conservative faction refused him a place
-in American literature. The radical and advanced wing said that American
-literature had some blood in its veins at last. Hermia took all the
-papers, and a day seldom passed that Quintard’s name, either in
-execration or commendation, did not meet her eyes. The derogatory
-articles cut her to the quick or aroused her to fury; and the adulation
-he received delighted her as keenly as if offered to herself.
-
-He was with her in his periods of elation and depression, and it was at
-such times that the better part of her nature was stirred. He needed
-her. She could give him that help and comfort and sympathy without which
-his life would be barren. She knew that under the hard, outer crust of
-her nature lay the stunted germs of self-abnegation and sacrifice, and
-there were moments when she longed with all the ardor of her quickening
-soul to give her life to this man’s happiness and good. Then the mood
-would pass, and she would look back upon it with impatience.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XXXIV.
-
-
- LIFE FROM DEATH.
-
-Hermia was in bed one morning when her maid brought her the papers. She
-opened one, then sat suddenly erect, and the paper shook in her hands.
-She read the headlines through twice—details were needless. Then she
-dropped the paper and fell back on the pillows. A train had gone over an
-embankment in the South, and Ogden Cryder’s name was in the list of
-dead.
-
-She lay staring at the painted canopy of her bed. It seemed to her that
-with Cryder’s life her past was annihilated, that the man took with him
-every act and deed of which she had been a part. A curtain seemed to
-roll down just behind her. A drama had been enacted, but it was over.
-What had it been about? She had forgotten. She could recall nothing.
-That curtain shut out every memory.
-
-She pressed her hands over her eyes. She was free! She could take up her
-life from this hour and forget that any man had entered it but Grettan
-Quintard. Cryder? Who was he? Had he ever lived? What did he look like?
-She could not remember. She could recall but one face—a face which
-should never be seen in this room.
-
-Though her mood was not a hard one, she felt no pity for Cryder. Love
-had made every object in life insignificant but herself and her lover.
-
-She would marry Quintard. She would be all that in her better moments
-she had dreamed of being—that and more. She had great capacity for good
-in her; her respect and admiration for Quintard’s higher qualities had
-taught her that. She threw up her arms and struck her open palms against
-the bed’s head. And how she loved him! What exultation in the thought of
-her power to give him happiness!
-
-For a few days Quintard felt as if he were walking on the edge of a
-crater. The hardness in her nature seemed to have melted and gone. The
-defiant, almost cynical look had left her eyes; they were dreamy, almost
-appealing. She made no further effort to tempt him, but he had a weird
-feeling that if he touched her he would receive an electric shock. He
-did not suspect the cause of the sudden change, nor did he care to know.
-It was enough that it was.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XXXV.
-
-
- IDEALS RESTORED.
-
-They were sitting together one evening in the jungle. The night was hot
-and the windows were open, but the curtains were drawn. The lamps were
-hidden behind the palms, and the room was full of mellow light. Hermia
-sat on a bank of soft, green cushions, and Quintard lay beside her.
-Hermia wore a loose gown of pale-green mull, that fell straight from her
-bosom’s immovable swell, and her neck and arms were bare. She had
-clasped her hands about her knee and was leaning slightly forward.
-Beside her was a heavy mass of foliage, and against it shone her hair
-and the polished whiteness of her skin.
-
-“Now that you are famous, and your book has been discussed threadbare,
-what are you going to do next?” she asked him.
-
-“I want to write some romances about the princely houses of India—of
-that period which immediately antedates the invasion of the East India
-Company. I spent a year in northern and western India, and collected a
-quantity of material. We know little of the picturesque side of India
-outside of Macaulay, Crawford, and Edwin Arnold, and it is immensely
-fertile in romance and anecdote. There never were such love-affairs,
-such daring intrigues, such tragedies! And the setting! It would take
-twenty vocabularies to do it justice; but it is gratifying to find a
-setting upon which one vocabulary has not been twenty times exhausted.
-And then I have half promised Mrs. Trennor-Secor to dramatize Rossetti’s
-‘Rose Mary’ for her. She wants to use it at Newport this summer, or
-rather, she wanted something, and I suggested that. I have always
-intended to do it. But I feel little in the humor for writing at
-present, to tell you the truth.”
-
-He stopped abruptly, and Hermia clasped her hands more tightly about her
-knee. “What are your plans for ‘Rose Mary’?” she asked. “I hope you will
-have five or six voices sing the Beryl songs behind the altar. The
-effect would be weird and most impressive.”
-
-“That is a good idea,” said Quintard. “How many ideas you have given
-me!”
-
-“Tell me your general plan,” she said quickly.
-
-He sketched it to her, and she questioned him at length, nervously
-keeping him on the subject as long as she could. The atmosphere seemed
-charged; they would never get through this evening in safety! If he
-retained his self-control, she felt that she should lose hers.
-
-She pressed her face down against her knee, and his words began to reach
-her consciousness with the indistinctness of words that come through
-ears that are the outposts of a dreaming brain. When he finished he sat
-suddenly upright, and for a few moments uttered no word. He sat close
-beside her, almost touching her, and Hermia felt as if her veins’ rivers
-had emptied their cataracts into her ears. Her nerves were humming in a
-vast choir. She made a rigid attempt at self-control, and the effort
-made her tremble. Quintard threw himself forward, and putting his hand
-to her throat forced back her head. Her face was white, but her lips
-were burning. Quintard pressed his mouth to hers—and Hermia took her
-ideals to her heart once more.
-
-Time passed and the present returned to them. He spoke his first word.
-“We will be married before the week is out. Promise.”
-
-He left her suddenly, and Hermia sank back and down amidst the cushions.
-Once or twice she moved impatiently. Why was he not with her? The
-languor in her veins grew heavier and wrapped her about as in a
-covering. She slept.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XXXVI.
-
-
- AN AWAKENING.
-
-When Hermia awoke there was a rattle of wagons in the street, and the
-dawn struggled through the curtains. There was a chill in the air and
-she shivered a little. She lay recalling the events of the night.
-Suddenly she sat upright and cast about her a furtive glance of horror.
-Then she sat still and her teeth chattered.
-
-Cryder’s face looked at her from behind every palm! It grinned mockingly
-down from every tree! It sprang from the cushions and pressed itself
-close to her cheek! The room was _peopled_ with Cryder!
-
-She sprang to her feet and threw her arms above her head. “O God!” she
-cried; “it was but for a night! for a night!”
-
-She fled down the room, Cryder, in augmenting swarm, pursuing her. She
-flew up the stairs and into her room, and there flung herself on the
-floor in such mortal agony as she could never know again, because the
-senses must be blunted ever after. Last night, in Quintard’s arms, as
-heaven’s lightning flashed through her heart, every avenue in it had
-been rent wide. The great mystery of life had poured through, flooding
-them with light, throwing into cloudless relief the glorious heights and
-the muttering depths. Last night she had dwelt on the heights, and in
-that starry ether had given no glance to the yawning pits below. But
-sleep had come; she had slid gently, unwittingly down; she had awakened
-to find herself writhing on the sharp, jutting rocks of a rayless
-cavern, on whose roof of sunset gold she had rambled for days and weeks
-with a security which had in it the blindness of infatuation.
-
-She marry Quintard and live with him as the woman he loved and honored
-above all women! She try to scale those heights where was to be garnered
-something better worth offering her lover than any stores in her own
-sterile soul! That hideous, ineffaceable brand seemed scorching her
-breast with letters of fire. If she had but half loved Cryder—but she
-had not loved him for a moment. With her right hand she had cast the
-veil over her eyes; with her left, she had fought away all promptings
-that would have rent the veil in twain. Every moment, from beginning to
-awakening, she had shut her ears to the voice which would have whispered
-that her love was a deliberate delusion, created and developed by her
-will. No! she had no excuse. She was a woman of brains; there was no
-truth she might not have grasped had she chosen to turn her eyes and
-face it.
-
-She flung her arms over her head, grasping the fringes of the rug, and
-twisting them into a shapeless mass. She moaned aloud in quick, short,
-unconscious throbs of sound. She was five-and-twenty, and life was over.
-She had wandered through long years in a wilderness as desolate as
-night, and she had reached the gates of the city to find them shut. They
-had opened for a moment and she had stood within them; then a hand had
-flung her backward, and the great, golden portals had rushed together
-with an impetus which welded them for all time. She made no excuses for
-herself; she hurled no anathemas against fate. Her intellect had been
-given to her to save her from the mistakes of foolish humanity, a lamp
-to keep her out of the mud. She had shaded the lamp and gone down into
-the mire. She had known by experience and by thought that no act of
-man’s life passed without a scar; that the scars knit together and
-formed the separate, indestructible constituent fibers of his character.
-And each fiber influenced eternally the structure as a whole. She had
-known this, and yet, without a glance into the future, without a stray
-thought tossed to issues, she had burnt herself as indifferently as a
-woman who has nothing to lose. It was true that great atonement was in
-her power, that in a life’s reach of love and duty the scar would fade.
-But that was not in the question. With such tragic natures there is no
-medium. She could not see a year in the future that would not be haunted
-with memories and regrets; an hour when that scar would not burn.
-
-If life could not be perfect, she would have nothing less. She had dealt
-her cards, she would accept the result. She had had it in her to enjoy a
-happiness possible only to women of her intellect and temperament. She
-had deliberately put happiness out of her life, and there could be but
-one end to the matter.
-
-She sprang to her feet. She had no tears, but it seemed as if something
-had its teeth at her vitals and was tearing them as a tiger tears its
-victim. She walked aimlessly up and down the room until exhausted, then
-went mechanically to bed.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XXXVII.
-
-
- THE DOCTRINE OF THE INEVITABLE.
-
-Late in the day her maid awoke her and said that Mrs. Dykman was
-down-stairs.
-
-Hermia hesitated; then she bade the girl bring the visitor up to her
-boudoir. It was as well for several reasons that Mrs. Dykman should
-know.
-
-She thrust her feet into a pair of night-slippers, drew a dressing-gown
-about her, and went into the next room. Mrs. Dykman, as she entered a
-moment later, raised her level brows.
-
-“Hermia!” she said, “what is the matter?”
-
-Hermia glanced at herself in the mirror. She shuddered a little at her
-reflection. “Several things,” she said, briefly. “Sit down.”
-
-Mrs. Dykman, with an extremely uncomfortable sensation, took a chair. On
-the occasion of her first long conversation with Hermia she had made up
-her mind that her new-found relative would one day electrify the world
-by some act which her family would strive to forget. How she wished
-Hermia had been cast in that world’s conventional mold! It had come! She
-was convinced of that, as she looked at Hermia’s face. What _had_ she
-done?
-
-“I have something to tell you,” said Hermia; and then she stopped.
-
-“Well?”
-
-Mrs. Dykman uttered only one word; but before that calm, impassive
-expectancy there was no retreat. She looked as immovable, yet as
-compelling, as a sphinx.
-
-Hermia told her story to the end. At so low an ebb was her vitality that
-not a throb of excitement was in her voice.
-
-When she had finished, Mrs. Dykman drew a breath of relief. It was all
-very terrible, of course, but she had felt an indefinable dread of
-something worse. She knew with whom she had to deal, however, and
-decided upon her line of argument without the loss of a moment. For
-Hermia to allow any barrier to stand between herself and Quintard was
-ridiculous.
-
-“It is a very unfortunate thing,” she said, in a tone intended to
-impress Hermia with its lack of horror; “but has it occurred to you that
-it could not be helped?”
-
-“What do you mean?”
-
-“Do you remember that for more years than you can count you nursed and
-trained and hugged the idea of an adventurous love-affair? The moment
-you got the necessary conditions you thought of nothing but of realizing
-your dream. To have changed your ideas would have involved the changing
-of your whole nature. The act was as inevitable as any minor act in life
-which is the direct result of the act which preceded it. You could no
-more have helped having an intrigue than you could help having typhoid
-fever if your system were in the necessary condition. I think that is a
-logical statement of the matter.”
-
-“I do not deny it,” said Hermia indifferently; “but why was I so blind
-as to mistake the wrong man for the right?”
-
-“The men of your imagination were so far above reality that all men you
-met were a disappointment. Cryder was the first who had any of the
-qualities you demanded. And there was much about Cryder to please; he
-was one of the most charming men I ever met. You found it delightful to
-be with a man who, you thought, understood you, and whose mind was equal
-to your own. You were lonely, too—you wanted a companion. If Quintard
-had come first, there would have been no question of mistake; but, as
-the case stands, it was perfectly natural for you to imagine yourself in
-love with Cryder.”
-
-Hermia turned her head listlessly against the back of the chair and
-stared at the wall. It was all true; but what difference did it make?
-
-Mrs. Dykman went on: “Moreover—although it is difficult for you to
-accept such a truth in your present frame of mind—the affair did you
-good, and your chances of happiness are greater than if you took into
-matrimony neither experience nor the memory of mistakes. If you had met
-Quintard first and married him, you would have carried with you through
-life the regret that you had never realized your wayward dreams. You
-would have continued to invest an intrigue with all the romance of your
-imagination; now you know exactly how little there is in it. What is
-more, you have learned something of the difference in men, and will be
-able to appreciate a man like Quintard. You will realize how few men
-there are in the world who satisfy all the wants of a woman’s nature.
-There is no effect in a picture without both light and shade. The life
-you will have with Quintard will be the more complete and beautiful by
-its contrast to the emptiness and baldness of your attempt with Cryder.”
-
-Hermia placed her elbows on her knees and pressed her hands against her
-face. “You are appealing to my intellect,” she said; “and what you say
-is very clever, and worthy of you. But, if I had met Quintard in time,
-he would have dispelled all my false illusions and made me more than
-content with what he offered in return. No, I have made a horrible
-mistake, and no logic will help me.”
-
-“But look at another side of the question. You have given yourself to
-one man; Heaven knows how many love affairs Grettan Quintard has had.
-You know this; you heard him acknowledge it in so many words. And yet
-you find no fault with him. Why, then, is your one indiscretion so much
-greater than his many? Your life until you met Quintard was your own to
-do with as it pleased you. If you chose to take the same privilege that
-the social code allows to men, the relative sin is very small; about
-positive right and wrong I do not pretend to know anything. With the
-uneven standard of morality set up by the world and by religion, who
-does? But relatively you are so much less guilty than Quintard that the
-matter is hardly worth discussing. And, if he never discovers that you
-give him less than he believes, it will not hurt him. When you are
-older, you will have a less tender regard for men than you have to-day.”
-
-Hermia leaned back and sighed heavily. “Oh, it is not the abstract sin,”
-she said. “It is that _it was_, and that _now_ I love.”
-
-“Hermia,” said Mrs. Dykman, sternly, “this is unworthy of a woman of
-your brains and character. You have the strongest will of any woman I
-have ever known; take your past by the throat and put it behind you.
-Stifle it and forget it. You have the power, and you must surely have
-the desire.”
-
-“No,” said Hermia, “I have neither the power nor the desire. That is the
-one thing in my life beyond the control of my will.”
-
-“Then there is but one thing that will bring back your normal frame of
-mind, and that is change. I will give you a summer in London and a
-winter in Paris. I promise that at the end of that time you will marry
-Quintard.”
-
-“Well,” said Hermia, listlessly, “I will think of it.” She was beginning
-to wish her aunt would go. She had made her more disgusted with life
-than ever.
-
-Mrs. Dykman divined that it was time to leave the girl alone, and rose.
-She hesitated a moment and then placed her hand on Hermia’s shoulder. “I
-have had every experience that life offers to women,” she said—and for
-the first time in Hermia’s knowledge of her those even tones
-deepened—“every tragedy, every comedy, every bitterness, every
-joy—_everything_. Therefore, my advice has its worth. There is little
-in life—make the most of that little when you find it. You are facing a
-problem that more than one woman has faced before, and you will work it
-out as other women have done. It was never intended that a life-time of
-suffering should be the result of one mistake.” Then she gathered her
-wraps about her and left the room.
-
-Shortly after, Hermia drove down to her lawyer’s office and made a will.
-She left bequests to Helen Simms and Miss Newton, and divided the bulk
-of her property between Bessie, Miss Starbruck, and Mrs. Dykman.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XXXVIII.
-
-
- BETWEEN DAY AND NIGHT.
-
-Hermia sat by the window waiting for Quintard. It was the saddest hour
-of the day—that hour of dusk when the lamplighter trudges on his
-rounds. How many women have sat in their darkening rooms at that hour
-with their brows against the glass and watched their memories rise and
-sing a dirge! Even a child—if it be a woman-child—is oppressed in that
-shadow-haunted land between day and night, for the sadness of the future
-is on her. It is the hour when souls in their strain feel that the
-tension must snap; when tortured hearts send their cries through
-forbidding brains. The sun has gone, the lamps are unlit, the shadows
-lord and mock until they are blotted out under falling tears.
-
-Hermia rose suddenly and left the room. She went into the dining-room
-and drank a glass of sherry. She wore a black gown, and her face was as
-wan as the white-faced sky; but in a moment the wine brought color to
-her lips and cheeks. Then she went into the jungle and lit the lamps.
-
-She was standing by one of the date-trees as Quintard entered. As he
-came up to her he took her hand in both his own, but he did not kiss
-her; he almost dreaded a renewal of last night’s excitement. Hermia,
-moreover, was a woman whose moods must be respected; she did not look as
-if she were ready to be kissed.
-
-“Are you ill?” he asked, with a tenderness in his voice which made her
-set her teeth. “Your eyes are hollow. I am afraid you did not sleep.
-I”—the dark color coming under his skin—“did not sleep either.”
-
-“I slept,” said Hermia—“a little; but I have a headache.”
-
-They went to the end of the room and sat down, she on the bank, he
-opposite, on a seat made to represent a hollowed stump.
-
-They talked of many things, as lovers do in those intervals between the
-end of one whirlwind and the half-feared, half-longed-for beginning of
-another. He told her that the Poet’s Club, after a mighty battle which
-had threatened disruption, had formally elected him a member. Word had
-been sent to his rooms late in the afternoon. Then he told her that they
-were to be married on Thursday, and to sail for Europe in the early
-morning on his yacht. He spoke of the places they would visit, the old
-cities he had loved to roam about alone, where idle talk would have
-shattered the charm. And he would take her into the heart of nature and
-teach her to forget that the world of men existed. And the sea—they
-both loved the sea better than all. He would teach her how every ocean,
-every river, every stream spoke a language of its own, and told legends
-that put to shame those of forest and mountain, village and wilderness.
-They would lie on the sands and listen to the deep, steady voice of the
-ocean telling the secrets she carried in her stormy heart—secrets that
-were safe save when some mortal tuned his ear to her tongue. He threw
-back his head and quoted lingeringly from the divinest words that have
-ever been written about the sea:
-
- “Mother of loves that are swift to fade,
- Mother of mutable winds and hours,
- A barren mother, a mother-maid,
- Cold and clean as her faint, salt flowers.
- I would we twain were even as she,
- Lost in the night and the light of the sea,
- Where faint sounds falter and wan beams wade,
- Break and are broken, and shed into showers.
-
- * * * * * * *
-
- “O tender-hearted, O perfect lover,
- Thy lips are bitter, and sweet thine heart.
- The hopes that hurt and the dreams that hover,
- Shall they not vanish away and apart?
- But thou, thou art sure, thou art older than earth;
- Thou art strong for death and fruitful of birth;
- Thy depths conceal and thy gulfs discover;
- From the first thou wert; in the end thou art.”
-
-Hermia leaned forward and pressed her hands into his. “Come!” she said.
-
-He dropped on the cushion beside her and caught her to him in an embrace
-that hurt her; and under his kiss the coming hour was forgotten.
-
-After a time he pushed her back among the cushions and pressed his lips
-to her throat. Suddenly he stood up. “I am going,” he said. “We will be
-married at eight o’clock on Thursday night. I shall not see you until
-then.”
-
-She stood up also. “Wait a moment,” she said, “I want to say something
-to you before you go.” She looked at him steadily and said: “I was
-everything to Ogden Cryder.”
-
-For a moment it seemed as if Quintard had not understood. He put out his
-hand as if to ward off a blow, and looked at her almost inquiringly.
-
-“What did you say?” he muttered.
-
-“I tried to believe that I loved him, and failed. There is no excuse. I
-knew I did not. I tell you this because I love you too well to give you
-what you would have spurned had you known; and I tell you that you may
-forget me the sooner.”
-
-Quintard understood. He crossed the short distance between them and
-looked into her face.
-
-Hermia gave a rapturous cry. All that was brutal and savage in her
-nature surged upward in response to the murderous passion in this man
-who was bone of herself. Never had she been so at one with him; never
-had she so worshiped him as in that moment when she thought he was going
-to kill her. Then, like a flash, he left her.
-
- * * * * *
-
-
-
-
- CHAPTER XXXIX.
-
-
- THE REALIZATION OF IDEALS.
-
-She stood motionless for a few moments, then went up-stairs. As she
-crossed the hall she saw that the front-door was open, but she was too
-listless to close it. She went to her boudoir and sank into a chair. In
-the next room was a bottle of potassium cyanide which she had brought up
-from the butler’s pantry. It had been purchased to scour John Suydam’s
-silver, which had the rust of generations on it. She would get it in a
-few moments. She had a fancy to review her life before she ended it. All
-those years before the last two—had they ever really existed? Had there
-been a time when life had been before her? when circumstances had not
-combined to push her steadily to her destruction? No temptations had
-come to the plain, unattractive girl in the little Brooklyn flat. Though
-every desire had been ungratified, still her life had been unspoiled,
-and she had possessed a realm in which she had found perfect joy. Was it
-possible that she and that girl were the same? She was twenty years
-older and her life was over; that girl’s had not then begun. If she
-could be back in that past for a few moments! If, for a little time, she
-could blot out the present before she went into the future! She lifted
-her head. In a drawer of her wardrobe was an old brown-serge dress. She
-had kept it to look at occasionally, and with it assure, and reassure,
-herself that the present was not a dream. She had a fancy to look for a
-moment as she had looked in those days when all things were yet to be.
-
-She went into her bedroom and took out the dress. It was worn at the
-seams and dowdy of cut. She put it on. She dipped her hair into a basin
-of water, wrung it out, and twisted it in a tight knot at the back of
-her head, leaving her forehead bare. Then she went back to the boudoir
-and looked at herself in the glass. Yes, she was almost the same. The
-gown did not meet, but it hung about her in clumsy folds; the water made
-her hair lifeless and dull; and her skin was gray. Only her eyes were
-not those of a girl who had never looked upon the realities of life.
-Yes, she could easily be ugly again; but with ugliness would not come
-two years’ annihilation.
-
-She threw herself into a chair, and, covering her eyes with her hand,
-cried a little. To the hopes, the ambitions, the dreams, the longings,
-which had been her faithful companions throughout her life, she owed
-those tears. She would shed none for her mistakes. She dropped her hand
-and let her head fall back with a little sigh of content. At least there
-was one solution for all misery, and nothing could take it from her.
-Death was so easy to find; it dwelt in a little bottle in the next room.
-In an hour she would be beyond the reach of memories. What mattered this
-little hour of pain? There was an eternity of forgetfulness beyond.
-Another hour, and she would be like a bubble that had burst on the
-surface of a lake. Then an ugly thought flashed into her brain, and she
-pressed her hands against her eyes. Suppose there were a spiritual
-existence and she should meet Cryder in it! Suppose he were waiting for
-her at the threshold, and with malignant glee should link her to him for
-all eternity! His egoism would demand just such revenge for her failure
-to love him!
-
-She sprang to her feet. With difficulty she kept from screaming aloud.
-Was she mad?
-
-Then the fear left her eyes and her face relaxed. If the soul were
-immortal, and if each soul had its mate, hers was Quintard, and Cryder
-could not claim her. She felt a sudden fierce desire to meet Cryder
-again and pour out upon him the scorn and hatred which for the moment
-forced love from her heart.
-
-She dropped her hands to her sides and gazed at the floor for a while,
-forgetting Cryder. Then she walked toward her bedroom. As she reached
-the pillars she stopped and pressed her handkerchief to her mouth with a
-shudder of distaste. Cyanide of potassium was bitter, she had heard. She
-had always hated bitter things—quinine and camphor and barks; her
-mother used to give her a horrible tea when she was a child. * * * The
-taste seemed to come into her mouth and warp it. * * *
-
-She flung her handkerchief to the floor with an impatient gesture and
-went into the next room.
-
-A moment later she raised her head and listened. Then she drew a long,
-shuddering breath. Some one was springing up the stairs.
-
-She thrust her hands into her hair and ruffled it about her face; it was
-half dry, and the gold glinted through the damp.
-
-Quintard threw open the door of the boudoir and was at her side in an
-instant. His face was white and his lips were blue, but the fierceness
-was gone from his eyes.
-
-“You were going to kill yourself,” he said.
-
-“Yes,” she replied, “I shall kill myself.”
-
-“I knew it! Sit down and listen to me.”
-
-He pushed her on to a divan and sat in front of her.
-
-“I find by my watch that it is but an hour since I left you,” he went
-on. “I had thought the world had rolled out of its teens. For most of
-that hour I was mad. Then came back that terrible hunger of heart and
-soul, a moment of awful, prophetic solitude. Let your past go. I cannot
-live without you.”
-
-Hermia bent her body until her forehead touched her knees. “I cannot,”
-she said; “I never could forget, nor could you.”
-
-“I _would_ forget, and so will you. I will make you forget.”
-
-She shook her head. “Life—nothing would ever be the same to me; nor to
-you—now that I have told you.”
-
-He hesitated a moment. “You did right to tell me,” he said, “for your
-soul’s peace. And I—I love you the better for what you have suffered.
-And, my God! think of life without you! Let it go; we will make our past
-out of our future.”
-
-He sat down beside her and took her in his arms, then drew her across
-his lap and laid her head against his shoulder.
-
-“We are the creatures of opportunity, of circumstance,” he said; “we
-must bow to the Doctrine of the Inevitable. Inexorable circumstance
-waited too long to rivet our links; that is all. Circumstance is rarely
-kind save to the commonplace, for it is only the commonplace who never
-make mistakes. But no circumstance shall stand between us now. I love
-you, and you are mine.”
-
-He drew her arms about his neck and kissed her softly on her eyes, her
-face, her mouth.
-
-“You have suffered,” he whispered, “but let it be over and forgotten.
-Poor girl! how fate all your life has stranded you in the desert, and
-how you have beaten your wings against the ground and fought to get out.
-Come to me and forget—forget—”
-
-She tightened her arm about his neck and pressed his face against her
-shoulder. Then she took the cork from the phial hidden in her sleeve.
-With a sudden instinct Quintard threw back his head, and the movement
-knocked the phial from her hand. It fell to the floor and broke.
-
-For a moment he looked at her without speaking. Under the reproach in
-his eyes her lids fell.
-
-He spoke at last. “Have you not thought of me once, Hermia? Are you so
-utterly absorbed in yourself, in your desire to bury your misery in
-oblivion, that you have not a thought left for my suffering, for my
-loneliness, and for my remorse? Do you suppose I could ever forget that
-you killed yourself for me? You are afraid to live; you can find no
-courage to carry through life the gnawing at your soul. You have
-pictured every horror of such an existence. And yet, by your own act,
-you willingly abandon one whom you profess to love, to a life full of
-the torments which you so terribly and elaborately comprehend.”
-
-Hermia lay still a moment, then slipped from his arms and rose to her
-feet. For a few moments she walked slowly up and down the room, then
-stood before him. The mask of her face was the same, but through it a
-new spirit shone. It was the supreme moment of Hermia’s life. She might
-not again touch the depths of her old selfishness, but as surely would
-she never a second time brush her wings against the peaks of self’s
-emancipation.
-
-“You are right,” she said; “I had not thought of you. I have sulked in
-the lap of my own egoism all my life. That a human soul might get
-outside of itself has never occurred to me—until now. I will live and
-rejoice in my own abnegation, for the sacrifice will give me something
-the better to offer you. I have suffered, and I shall suffer as long as
-I live—but I believe you will be the happier for it.”
-
-He stood up and grasped her hands. “Hermia!” he exclaimed beneath his
-breath, “Hermia, promise it! Promise me that you will live, that you
-will never kill yourself. There might be wild moments of
-remorse—promise.”
-
-“I promise,” she said.
-
-“Ah! you are true to yourself at last.” Suddenly he shook from head to
-foot, and leaned heavily against her.
-
-She put her arms about him. “What is the matter?” she asked through
-white lips.
-
-“There is a trouble of the heart,” he murmured unsteadily, “it is not
-dangerous. The tension has been very strong
-to-night—but—to-morrow”—and then he fell to the floor.
-
-She was beside him still when Miss Starbruck entered the room. The old
-lady’s eyes were angry and defiant, and her mouth was set in a hard
-line. For the first time in her life she was not afraid of Hermia.
-
-“I heard his voice some time ago,” she said, hoarsely, “and at first I
-did not dare face you and come in. But you are my dead sister’s child,
-and I will do my duty by you. You shall not disgrace your mother’s
-blood—why is he lying there like that?”
-
-Hermia rose and confronted her, and involuntarily Miss Starbruck lowered
-her eyes.
-
-“He is dead,” said Hermia, “and I——have promised to live.”
-
-
- THE END.
-
- * * * * *
-
-=Transcriber’s Notes:=
-
-Spellings and hyphenation have been retained as in the original.
-Punctuation has been corrected without note.
-
-
-
-
-
-End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Hermia Suydam, by Gertrude Atherton
-
-*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK HERMIA SUYDAM ***
-
-***** This file should be named 50169-0.txt or 50169-0.zip *****
-This and all associated files of various formats will be found in:
- http://www.gutenberg.org/5/0/1/6/50169/
-
-Produced by Mardi Desjardins & the online Distributed
-Proofreaders Canada team (http://www.pgdpcanada.net) from
-page images generously made available by The Internet
-Archive American Libraries
-(https://archive.org/details/americana)
-
-Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will
-be renamed.
-
-Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright
-law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works,
-so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United
-States without permission and without paying copyright
-royalties. Special rules, set forth in the General Terms of Use part
-of this license, apply to copying and distributing Project
-Gutenberg-tm electronic works to protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm
-concept and trademark. Project Gutenberg is a registered trademark,
-and may not be used if you charge for the eBooks, unless you receive
-specific permission. If you do not charge anything for copies of this
-eBook, complying with the rules is very easy. You may use this eBook
-for nearly any purpose such as creation of derivative works, reports,
-performances and research. They may be modified and printed and given
-away--you may do practically ANYTHING in the United States with eBooks
-not protected by U.S. copyright law. Redistribution is subject to the
-trademark license, especially commercial redistribution.
-
-START: FULL LICENSE
-
-THE FULL PROJECT GUTENBERG LICENSE
-PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU DISTRIBUTE OR USE THIS WORK
-
-To protect the Project Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting the free
-distribution of electronic works, by using or distributing this work
-(or any other work associated in any way with the phrase "Project
-Gutenberg"), you agree to comply with all the terms of the Full
-Project Gutenberg-tm License available with this file or online at
-www.gutenberg.org/license.
-
-Section 1. General Terms of Use and Redistributing Project
-Gutenberg-tm electronic works
-
-1.A. By reading or using any part of this Project Gutenberg-tm
-electronic work, you indicate that you have read, understand, agree to
-and accept all the terms of this license and intellectual property
-(trademark/copyright) agreement. If you do not agree to abide by all
-the terms of this agreement, you must cease using and return or
-destroy all copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in your
-possession. If you paid a fee for obtaining a copy of or access to a
-Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work and you do not agree to be bound
-by the terms of this agreement, you may obtain a refund from the
-person or entity to whom you paid the fee as set forth in paragraph
-1.E.8.
-
-1.B. "Project Gutenberg" is a registered trademark. It may only be
-used on or associated in any way with an electronic work by people who
-agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement. There are a few
-things that you can do with most Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works
-even without complying with the full terms of this agreement. See
-paragraph 1.C below. There are a lot of things you can do with Project
-Gutenberg-tm electronic works if you follow the terms of this
-agreement and help preserve free future access to Project Gutenberg-tm
-electronic works. See paragraph 1.E below.
-
-1.C. The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation ("the
-Foundation" or PGLAF), owns a compilation copyright in the collection
-of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works. Nearly all the individual
-works in the collection are in the public domain in the United
-States. If an individual work is unprotected by copyright law in the
-United States and you are located in the United States, we do not
-claim a right to prevent you from copying, distributing, performing,
-displaying or creating derivative works based on the work as long as
-all references to Project Gutenberg are removed. Of course, we hope
-that you will support the Project Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting
-free access to electronic works by freely sharing Project Gutenberg-tm
-works in compliance with the terms of this agreement for keeping the
-Project Gutenberg-tm name associated with the work. You can easily
-comply with the terms of this agreement by keeping this work in the
-same format with its attached full Project Gutenberg-tm License when
-you share it without charge with others.
-
-1.D. The copyright laws of the place where you are located also govern
-what you can do with this work. Copyright laws in most countries are
-in a constant state of change. If you are outside the United States,
-check the laws of your country in addition to the terms of this
-agreement before downloading, copying, displaying, performing,
-distributing or creating derivative works based on this work or any
-other Project Gutenberg-tm work. The Foundation makes no
-representations concerning the copyright status of any work in any
-country outside the United States.
-
-1.E. Unless you have removed all references to Project Gutenberg:
-
-1.E.1. The following sentence, with active links to, or other
-immediate access to, the full Project Gutenberg-tm License must appear
-prominently whenever any copy of a Project Gutenberg-tm work (any work
-on which the phrase "Project Gutenberg" appears, or with which the
-phrase "Project Gutenberg" is associated) is accessed, displayed,
-performed, viewed, copied or distributed:
-
- This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and
- most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no
- restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it
- under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this
- eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the
- United States, you'll have to check the laws of the country where you
- are located before using this ebook.
-
-1.E.2. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is
-derived from texts not protected by U.S. copyright law (does not
-contain a notice indicating that it is posted with permission of the
-copyright holder), the work can be copied and distributed to anyone in
-the United States without paying any fees or charges. If you are
-redistributing or providing access to a work with the phrase "Project
-Gutenberg" associated with or appearing on the work, you must comply
-either with the requirements of paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 or
-obtain permission for the use of the work and the Project Gutenberg-tm
-trademark as set forth in paragraphs 1.E.8 or 1.E.9.
-
-1.E.3. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is posted
-with the permission of the copyright holder, your use and distribution
-must comply with both paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 and any
-additional terms imposed by the copyright holder. Additional terms
-will be linked to the Project Gutenberg-tm License for all works
-posted with the permission of the copyright holder found at the
-beginning of this work.
-
-1.E.4. Do not unlink or detach or remove the full Project Gutenberg-tm
-License terms from this work, or any files containing a part of this
-work or any other work associated with Project Gutenberg-tm.
-
-1.E.5. Do not copy, display, perform, distribute or redistribute this
-electronic work, or any part of this electronic work, without
-prominently displaying the sentence set forth in paragraph 1.E.1 with
-active links or immediate access to the full terms of the Project
-Gutenberg-tm License.
-
-1.E.6. You may convert to and distribute this work in any binary,
-compressed, marked up, nonproprietary or proprietary form, including
-any word processing or hypertext form. However, if you provide access
-to or distribute copies of a Project Gutenberg-tm work in a format
-other than "Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other format used in the official
-version posted on the official Project Gutenberg-tm web site
-(www.gutenberg.org), you must, at no additional cost, fee or expense
-to the user, provide a copy, a means of exporting a copy, or a means
-of obtaining a copy upon request, of the work in its original "Plain
-Vanilla ASCII" or other form. Any alternate format must include the
-full Project Gutenberg-tm License as specified in paragraph 1.E.1.
-
-1.E.7. Do not charge a fee for access to, viewing, displaying,
-performing, copying or distributing any Project Gutenberg-tm works
-unless you comply with paragraph 1.E.8 or 1.E.9.
-
-1.E.8. You may charge a reasonable fee for copies of or providing
-access to or distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works
-provided that
-
-* You pay a royalty fee of 20% of the gross profits you derive from
- the use of Project Gutenberg-tm works calculated using the method
- you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. The fee is owed
- to the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark, but he has
- agreed to donate royalties under this paragraph to the Project
- Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation. Royalty payments must be paid
- within 60 days following each date on which you prepare (or are
- legally required to prepare) your periodic tax returns. Royalty
- payments should be clearly marked as such and sent to the Project
- Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation at the address specified in
- Section 4, "Information about donations to the Project Gutenberg
- Literary Archive Foundation."
-
-* You provide a full refund of any money paid by a user who notifies
- you in writing (or by e-mail) within 30 days of receipt that s/he
- does not agree to the terms of the full Project Gutenberg-tm
- License. You must require such a user to return or destroy all
- copies of the works possessed in a physical medium and discontinue
- all use of and all access to other copies of Project Gutenberg-tm
- works.
-
-* You provide, in accordance with paragraph 1.F.3, a full refund of
- any money paid for a work or a replacement copy, if a defect in the
- electronic work is discovered and reported to you within 90 days of
- receipt of the work.
-
-* You comply with all other terms of this agreement for free
- distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm works.
-
-1.E.9. If you wish to charge a fee or distribute a Project
-Gutenberg-tm electronic work or group of works on different terms than
-are set forth in this agreement, you must obtain permission in writing
-from both the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation and The
-Project Gutenberg Trademark LLC, the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm
-trademark. Contact the Foundation as set forth in Section 3 below.
-
-1.F.
-
-1.F.1. Project Gutenberg volunteers and employees expend considerable
-effort to identify, do copyright research on, transcribe and proofread
-works not protected by U.S. copyright law in creating the Project
-Gutenberg-tm collection. Despite these efforts, Project Gutenberg-tm
-electronic works, and the medium on which they may be stored, may
-contain "Defects," such as, but not limited to, incomplete, inaccurate
-or corrupt data, transcription errors, a copyright or other
-intellectual property infringement, a defective or damaged disk or
-other medium, a computer virus, or computer codes that damage or
-cannot be read by your equipment.
-
-1.F.2. LIMITED WARRANTY, DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES - Except for the "Right
-of Replacement or Refund" described in paragraph 1.F.3, the Project
-Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the owner of the Project
-Gutenberg-tm trademark, and any other party distributing a Project
-Gutenberg-tm electronic work under this agreement, disclaim all
-liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal
-fees. YOU AGREE THAT YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE, STRICT
-LIABILITY, BREACH OF WARRANTY OR BREACH OF CONTRACT EXCEPT THOSE
-PROVIDED IN PARAGRAPH 1.F.3. YOU AGREE THAT THE FOUNDATION, THE
-TRADEMARK OWNER, AND ANY DISTRIBUTOR UNDER THIS AGREEMENT WILL NOT BE
-LIABLE TO YOU FOR ACTUAL, DIRECT, INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR
-INCIDENTAL DAMAGES EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH
-DAMAGE.
-
-1.F.3. LIMITED RIGHT OF REPLACEMENT OR REFUND - If you discover a
-defect in this electronic work within 90 days of receiving it, you can
-receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending a
-written explanation to the person you received the work from. If you
-received the work on a physical medium, you must return the medium
-with your written explanation. The person or entity that provided you
-with the defective work may elect to provide a replacement copy in
-lieu of a refund. If you received the work electronically, the person
-or entity providing it to you may choose to give you a second
-opportunity to receive the work electronically in lieu of a refund. If
-the second copy is also defective, you may demand a refund in writing
-without further opportunities to fix the problem.
-
-1.F.4. Except for the limited right of replacement or refund set forth
-in paragraph 1.F.3, this work is provided to you 'AS-IS', WITH NO
-OTHER WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT
-LIMITED TO WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY OR FITNESS FOR ANY PURPOSE.
-
-1.F.5. Some states do not allow disclaimers of certain implied
-warranties or the exclusion or limitation of certain types of
-damages. If any disclaimer or limitation set forth in this agreement
-violates the law of the state applicable to this agreement, the
-agreement shall be interpreted to make the maximum disclaimer or
-limitation permitted by the applicable state law. The invalidity or
-unenforceability of any provision of this agreement shall not void the
-remaining provisions.
-
-1.F.6. INDEMNITY - You agree to indemnify and hold the Foundation, the
-trademark owner, any agent or employee of the Foundation, anyone
-providing copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in
-accordance with this agreement, and any volunteers associated with the
-production, promotion and distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm
-electronic works, harmless from all liability, costs and expenses,
-including legal fees, that arise directly or indirectly from any of
-the following which you do or cause to occur: (a) distribution of this
-or any Project Gutenberg-tm work, (b) alteration, modification, or
-additions or deletions to any Project Gutenberg-tm work, and (c) any
-Defect you cause.
-
-Section 2. Information about the Mission of Project Gutenberg-tm
-
-Project Gutenberg-tm is synonymous with the free distribution of
-electronic works in formats readable by the widest variety of
-computers including obsolete, old, middle-aged and new computers. It
-exists because of the efforts of hundreds of volunteers and donations
-from people in all walks of life.
-
-Volunteers and financial support to provide volunteers with the
-assistance they need are critical to reaching Project Gutenberg-tm's
-goals and ensuring that the Project Gutenberg-tm collection will
-remain freely available for generations to come. In 2001, the Project
-Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation was created to provide a secure
-and permanent future for Project Gutenberg-tm and future
-generations. To learn more about the Project Gutenberg Literary
-Archive Foundation and how your efforts and donations can help, see
-Sections 3 and 4 and the Foundation information page at
-www.gutenberg.org
-
-
-
-Section 3. Information about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation
-
-The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation is a non profit
-501(c)(3) educational corporation organized under the laws of the
-state of Mississippi and granted tax exempt status by the Internal
-Revenue Service. The Foundation's EIN or federal tax identification
-number is 64-6221541. Contributions to the Project Gutenberg Literary
-Archive Foundation are tax deductible to the full extent permitted by
-U.S. federal laws and your state's laws.
-
-The Foundation's principal office is in Fairbanks, Alaska, with the
-mailing address: PO Box 750175, Fairbanks, AK 99775, but its
-volunteers and employees are scattered throughout numerous
-locations. Its business office is located at 809 North 1500 West, Salt
-Lake City, UT 84116, (801) 596-1887. Email contact links and up to
-date contact information can be found at the Foundation's web site and
-official page at www.gutenberg.org/contact
-
-For additional contact information:
-
- Dr. Gregory B. Newby
- Chief Executive and Director
- gbnewby@pglaf.org
-
-Section 4. Information about Donations to the Project Gutenberg
-Literary Archive Foundation
-
-Project Gutenberg-tm depends upon and cannot survive without wide
-spread public support and donations to carry out its mission of
-increasing the number of public domain and licensed works that can be
-freely distributed in machine readable form accessible by the widest
-array of equipment including outdated equipment. Many small donations
-($1 to $5,000) are particularly important to maintaining tax exempt
-status with the IRS.
-
-The Foundation is committed to complying with the laws regulating
-charities and charitable donations in all 50 states of the United
-States. Compliance requirements are not uniform and it takes a
-considerable effort, much paperwork and many fees to meet and keep up
-with these requirements. We do not solicit donations in locations
-where we have not received written confirmation of compliance. To SEND
-DONATIONS or determine the status of compliance for any particular
-state visit www.gutenberg.org/donate
-
-While we cannot and do not solicit contributions from states where we
-have not met the solicitation requirements, we know of no prohibition
-against accepting unsolicited donations from donors in such states who
-approach us with offers to donate.
-
-International donations are gratefully accepted, but we cannot make
-any statements concerning tax treatment of donations received from
-outside the United States. U.S. laws alone swamp our small staff.
-
-Please check the Project Gutenberg Web pages for current donation
-methods and addresses. Donations are accepted in a number of other
-ways including checks, online payments and credit card donations. To
-donate, please visit: www.gutenberg.org/donate
-
-Section 5. General Information About Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works.
-
-Professor Michael S. Hart was the originator of the Project
-Gutenberg-tm concept of a library of electronic works that could be
-freely shared with anyone. For forty years, he produced and
-distributed Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks with only a loose network of
-volunteer support.
-
-Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks are often created from several printed
-editions, all of which are confirmed as not protected by copyright in
-the U.S. unless a copyright notice is included. Thus, we do not
-necessarily keep eBooks in compliance with any particular paper
-edition.
-
-Most people start at our Web site which has the main PG search
-facility: www.gutenberg.org
-
-This Web site includes information about Project Gutenberg-tm,
-including how to make donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary
-Archive Foundation, how to help produce our new eBooks, and how to
-subscribe to our email newsletter to hear about new eBooks.
-