diff options
Diffstat (limited to 'old/50099-h/50099-h.htm')
| -rw-r--r-- | old/50099-h/50099-h.htm | 5063 |
1 files changed, 0 insertions, 5063 deletions
diff --git a/old/50099-h/50099-h.htm b/old/50099-h/50099-h.htm deleted file mode 100644 index c287c21..0000000 --- a/old/50099-h/50099-h.htm +++ /dev/null @@ -1,5063 +0,0 @@ -<!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Strict//EN" - "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-strict.dtd"> -<html xmlns="http://www.w3.org/1999/xhtml" xml:lang="en" lang="en"> - <head> - <meta http-equiv="Content-Type" content="text/html;charset=iso-8859-1" /> - <meta http-equiv="Content-Style-Type" content="text/css" /> - <title> - The Project Gutenberg eBook of Mollentrave on Women, by Alfred Sutro. - </title> - <link rel="coverpage" href="images/cover.jpg" /> - <style type="text/css"> - -body { - margin-left: 10%; - margin-right: 10%; -} - - h1,h2 { - text-align: center; /* all headings centered */ - clear: both; -} - -p { - margin-top: .51em; - text-align: justify; - margin-bottom: .49em; -} - -.p2 {margin-top: 2em;} -.p6 {margin-top: 6em;} - -/* Easy Epub/HRs */ - -hr { - width: 33%; - margin-top: 2em; - margin-bottom: 2em; - margin-left: 33.5%; - margin-right: 33.5%; - clear: both; -} - -hr.tb {width: 45%; margin-left: 22.5%; margin-right: 22.5%;} -hr.chap {width: 65%; margin-left: 17.5%; margin-right: 17.5%;} - -ul, ul#index { list-style-type: none; display: inline-block;} -li {text-align: left;} - -/* Case Study: Tables */ - -table { - margin-left: auto; - margin-right: auto; - text-align: left; - display: inline-block; -} - -.pagenum { /* uncomment the next line for invisible page numbers */ - visibility: hidden; - position: absolute; - left: 92%; - font-size: smaller; - text-align: right; -} /* page numbers */ - -.hangindent { - text-indent: -2em; - margin-left: 10%; - margin-right: 10%; -} - -.bl {border-left: solid thin;} - -.center {text-align: center;} - -.right {text-align: right;} - -.left {text-align: left;} - -.smcap {font-variant: small-caps;} - -.old-english {font-weight: bold; - font-family: "Old English Text MT", Parchment, Garamond, serif;} - -.caption, .caption p {font-weight: bold; - text-align: center;} - -/* Images */ -.figcenter { - margin: auto; - text-align: center; -} - -/* Transcriber's notes */ -#transnote {background-color: #E6E6FA; - color: black; - font-size: smaller; - padding: 0.5em; - margin-bottom: 5em; - font-family: Georgia, Times, Times New Roman, serif} - -/* Easy Epub/Headings */ - -.large {font-size: large;} -.xlarge {font-size: x-large;} - -div#titlepage { - text-align: center; - page-break-before: always; - page-break-after: always; -} -div#titlepage p { - text-align: center; - text-indent: 0em; - font-weight: bold; - line-height: 1.5; - margin-top: 3em; -} - -div.chapter {page-break-before: always;} - -/* Case Study: Title Pages */ - -div#halftitle -{ - text-align: center; - page-break-before: always; - page-break-after: always; -} -@media screen -{ - #halftitle - { - margin: 6em 0; - } -} -@media print, handheld -{ - #halftitle - { - page-break-before: always; - page-break-after: always; - margin: 0; - padding-top: 6em; - } -} - -/* Easy Epub/Cover */ - -.covercaption {font-weight: bold; font-size: small;} -@media handheld { - .covercaption { display: none; } -} - -div.tnotes {background-color: #eeeeee; border: 1px solid black; padding: 1em;} -.covernote {visibility: hidden; display: none;} -@media handheld { - .covernote {visibility: visible; display: block;} -} - - </style> - </head> -<body> - - -<pre> - -The Project Gutenberg EBook of Mollentrave on Women; A comedy in three acts, by -Alfred Sutro - -This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most -other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions -whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms of -the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online at -www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States, you'll have -to check the laws of the country where you are located before using this ebook. - -Title: Mollentrave on Women; A comedy in three acts - A comedy in three acts - -Author: Alfred Sutro - -Release Date: September 30, 2015 [EBook #50099] - -Language: English - -Character set encoding: ISO-8859-1 - -*** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK MOLLENTRAVE ON WOMEN *** - - - - -Produced by Richard Tonsing, Clarity and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This -file was produced from images generously made available -by The Internet Archive/American Libraries.) - - - - - - -</pre> - -<div class="tnotes covernote"> - <p>The cover image was created by the transcriber and is placed in the public domain.</p> -</div> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_1" id="Page_1">[Pg 1]</a></span></p> -<div id="titlepage"> -<div class="chapter"></div> -<hr class="chap" /> - - - - -<h1>MOLLENTRAVE ON WOMEN</h1> - -<p class="old-english large">A Comedy in Three Acts</p> - - -<p>BY</p> - -<p class="xlarge">ALFRED SUTRO</p> - -<p class="center">AUTHOR OF "THE WALLS OF JERICHO," "A MARRIAGE HAS -BEEN ARRANGED," "A MAKER OF MEN," "THE -GUTTER OF TIME," "A GAME OF CHESS," -"MR. STEINMANN'S CORNER," -"CARROTS."</p> - -<p class="p6"><span class="smcap">Copyright, 1905, by Samuel French</span></p> - -<p class="p6"><span class="smcap">London<br /> -<span class="large">SAMUEL FRENCH, Ltd.<br /></span> -26 Southampton Street,<br /> -<span class="large">STRAND, LONDON.</span></span></p> - -<p class="center"><span class="smcap">New York<br /> -<span class="large">SAMUEL FRENCH<br /></span> -publisher<br /> -<span class="large">24 WEST 22d STREET</span><br /></span> -</p> -</div> - - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_2" id="Page_2">[Pg 2]</a><br /><a name="Page_3" id="Page_3">[Pg 3]</a></span></p> - -<p class="center"><i>The following is a copy of the original programme</i>:</p> - -<p class="center large">ST. JAMES THEATRE</p> - -<p class="center">KING STREET, S.W.</p> - -<p class="center"><i>Monday, February 13th, 1905.</i></p> - -<p class="center">THIS EVENING AT 9</p> - -<p class="center">WILL BE ACTED</p> - -<p class="center large">MOLLENTRAVE ON WOMEN</p> - -<p class="center">A New and Original Comedy in Three Acts</p> - -<p class="center"><span class="smcap">By</span> ALFRED SUTRO. -</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>"I wish it to be distinctly understood that, my scientific investigations -notwithstanding, I still regard woman as an amiable creature."</p></div> - -<p class="right">(<span class="smcap">Mollentrave on Women</span>: <i>Introduction</i>.)</p> - -<div class="center"> -<table border="0" cellpadding="4" cellspacing="0" summary="Characters"> - <tr> - <td>Mr. Mollentrave</td> - <td><span class="smcap">Mr. Eric Lewis.</span></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td>Sir Joseph Balsted, K.C., M.P.</td> - <td><span class="smcap">Mr. Norman McKinnel.</span></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td>Everard Swenboys</td> - <td><span class="smcap">Mr. Leslie Faber.</span></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td>Lord Contareen</td> - <td><span class="smcap">Mr. Robert Horton.</span></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td>Mr. Dexter</td> - <td><span class="smcap">Mr. E. Vivian Reynolds.</span></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td>Mr. Noyes</td> - <td><span class="smcap">Mr. Gerald Jerome.</span></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td>Peters</td> - <td><span class="smcap">Mr. E. H. Brooke.</span></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td>Martin</td> - <td><span class="smcap">Mr. Murray Carrington.</span></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td>Lady Claude Derenham</td> - <td><span class="smcap">Miss Marion Terry.</span></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td>Margaret Messilent</td> - <td><span class="smcap">Miss Lettice Fairfax.</span></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td>Miss Treable</td> - <td><span class="smcap">Miss Nora Greenlaw.</span></td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td>Mrs. Martelli</td> - <td><span class="smcap">Mrs. Kemmis.</span></td> - </tr> -</table></div> - -<div class="center p2"> -<table border="0" cellpadding="4" cellspacing="0" summary="contents"> - <tr> - <td><span class="smcap"><a href="#ACT_I">Act I.</a></span></td> - <td>—Study in Sir Joseph Balsted's House.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td><span class="smcap"><a href="#ACT_II">Act II.</a></span></td> - <td>—Drawing-room in Mr. Mollentrave's House.</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td><span class="smcap"><a href="#ACT_III">Act III.</a></span></td> - <td>—Garden of Mr. Mollentrave's House at Swanage.</td> - </tr> -</table></div> - -<p class="center p2"><span class="smcap">Time</span>—The Present. -</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_4" id="Page_4">[Pg 4]</a></span></p> -<div class="chapter"></div> -<hr class="chap" /> - - - - -<h2><a name="ACT_I" id="ACT_I">ACT I.</a></h2> - - -<p class="center">Time of Representation, forty minutes.</p> - -<div class="figcenter" style="width: 700px;"> -<div class="caption"><p>Scene.</p></div> -<img src="images/illus_004.jpg" width="700" height="464" alt="" /> -<div class="caption"><p>HAND PROPS.</p> - - -<ul><li>Book (Mollentrave on Women).</li> -<li>Bag (for Noyes).</li> -<li>Flowers (Everard).</li> -<li>Photographs on Mantelpiece.</li> -</ul> - -</div> -</div> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_5" id="Page_5">[Pg 5]</a></span></p> - -<p class="center">MOLLENTRAVE ON WOMEN.</p> - -<p class="center">ACT I. -</p> - -<p class="center"><span class="smcap">Sir Joseph Balsted's</span> <i>study, in his house in Hans -Place</i>. -</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Treable</span>, <span class="smcap">Margaret's</span> <i>companion, a faded -lady of uncertain age, is fingering the photograph -on the mantelpiece</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <span class="smcap">Mrs. Martelli</span>, -<i>the housekeeper, a grim-faced, elderly woman, -dressed in stiff black silk, opens the door and -enters</i> <span class="smcap">L. 3 E.</span> <span class="smcap">Miss Treable</span>, <i>absorbed in a -photograph she holds in her hand, does not -notice her</i>. <span class="smcap">Mrs. Martelli</span> <i>coughs emphatically</i>.</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> (<i>coming</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>turning</i>) Oh!... Dear -Mrs. Martelli, do you know who this is?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mrs. Mar.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>shortly</i>) Sir Joseph's sister.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> What an angelic face! The outline -so pure. Such heavenly eyes. (<i>returns</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>and -puts frame back</i>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mrs. Mar.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) She was marked with smallpox, -and had a pronounced squint.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> (<i>disconcerted</i>) Ah! I have noticed -these photographs before. I have a passion for -photographs. This one—? (<i>coming</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>—<i>she takes -up another</i>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mrs. Mar.</span> (<i>takes photo from</i> <span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span>) Sir<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_6" id="Page_6">[Pg 6]</a></span> -Joseph's mother. The other ladies are his cousin, -his aunt by marriage, and—me. (<span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> <i>goes</i> -<span class="smcap">R.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> (<i>with surprise</i>) You!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mrs. Mar.</span> (<i>with dignity</i>) My late husband, -Captain Martelli, of his Majesty's Indian army, -was a friend of Sir Joseph's (<span class="smcap">C.</span>). I trust you -find nothing remarkable in his widow's photograph -reposing on Sir Joseph's mantelpiece?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> (<i>comes down</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>and sits</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>chair</i>) -Oh, not at all, not at all.... My father was Canon -Treable—he preached before the Queen.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mrs. Mar.</span> (<i>puts photo back</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>and comes -down</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) So I have frequently heard. But I -admit it is a theme on which one cannot dwell -too often. None the less I consider it my duty, as -Sir Joseph's housekeeper, to inform Canon -Treable's daughter that this room is, as it were, -consecrated to Sir Joseph.</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> <i>rises and crosses</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>and sits on stool</i>.) -</p> - -<p>And that it is his wish, his formally expressed -instruction, that none but myself should enter it.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> Oh!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mrs. Mar.</span> (<i>to desk</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) I allow no housemaid -here—I dust it myself. Sir Joseph, in common -with most legal gentlemen, is partial to dust, but -I control his partiality. So you understand—(<i>down</i> -<span class="smcap">C.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> But the Courts have risen to-day, -dear Mrs. Martelli! The Long Vacation, they -call it, do they not? For nigh on three months -Sir Joseph ceases to be the brilliant advocate; -Parliament is not sitting, so the House will not -hear his inspired accents—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mrs. Mar.</span> My accents may be less inspired, -but they rest on authority; and I beg you to heed -them. This room is private.</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_7" id="Page_7">[Pg 7]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> (<i>sweetly</i>) I can quite understand -that, to the servants, it is a sanctuary.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mrs. Mar.</span> To the servants, and the upper -servants, Miss Treable. You and I are both upper -servants.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> (<i>rise, indignantly</i>) Mrs. Martelli! -This is intolerable. I am dear Margaret's companion—(<i>sit -on stool</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) her trusted friend—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mrs. Mar.</span> At so much per annum, paid quarterly. -Sir Joseph has confided the government -of his household to me.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> (<i>proudly</i>) I am not a member of -your household, madam! I take orders from Sir -Joseph alone—and then they come in form of -requests!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mrs. Mar.</span> You compel me, therefore, to inform -Sir Joseph of your truculent attitude—and demand -your dismissal.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> (<i>rise</i>) Dismissal!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mrs. Mar.</span> It would of course be within my -province to dismiss you myself—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> (<i>up to her</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) Insolent!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mrs. Mar.</span> But I shall leave that disagreeable -duty to Sir Joseph; and I have no doubt that it -will come, as you say, in the form of a request. I -have the honour to wish you good morning.</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Exit. L. 1 E.</span>) -</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<span class="smcap">Miss Treable</span> <i>sinks on the sofa</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>and sobs</i>. -<span class="smcap">Everard</span> <i>comes in from back</i> <span class="smcap">L. 3 E.</span>, <i>a good-looking -youngster of 25</i>.)</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Why, Treaby, what's the matter?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> (<i>stamping her foot</i>) How dare you -call me Treaby!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> Oh, I beg your pardon—but Margaret -always does.</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_8" id="Page_8">[Pg 8]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> Am I to be forever insulted in this -house? First by a wretched servant—then by -a mere boy!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> A boy—hang it! I shall be a full-fledged -doctor soon. But I apologise—there! -And Martelli's a hedgehog. Leave off sobbing -(<i>over back of settee</i>) do!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> (<i>through her tears</i>) I will tell Sir -Joseph he must choose between her—and me!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> She's an awful Tartar—I wonder my -uncle puts up with her. But come now, dear -Miss—Evangeline—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> (<i>coyly</i>) Mr. Swenboys?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>eagerly</i>) Did you give Margaret -those verses?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> I did.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>excited, away</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Well? Well?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> She—laughed.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>aghast</i>) Laughed!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> But really—why did you steal them -from Swinburne?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>comes</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) The devil! She spotted -it?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> Naturally. She adores Swinburne.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> I altered a word or two—I did, I -swear. And of course poetry's not in my line. -But I didn't think girls were allowed to read -Swinburne!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> An old-fashioned prejudice. To-day -we throw open the whole book of life.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> I didn't know! (<i>returning to back -of settee</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) But—Miss Treable—you're my -friend, aren't you? You'll help me?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> I am always on the side of love.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> Have I a chance, do you think? A -millionth part of a chance?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> You never speak to her!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> How can I? She's too—magnificent—she -dazzles me! Her eyes scorch me—I become<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_9" id="Page_9">[Pg 9]</a></span> -idiotic! I can talk, as a rule, I've something to -say—but not to her, not to her! Although Martelli -thinks—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> Martelli! That hateful name! Oh!</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<i>Her sobs begin again.</i> <span class="smcap">Margaret</span> <i>enters from -back</i> <span class="smcap">L. 3 E.</span>: <i>she pauses shyly at seeing</i> -<span class="smcap">Everard</span>.)</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) Oh Everard! Have you got -the flowers—the white roses?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> Yes, here they are. (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> How good of you. (<i>turning to</i> -<span class="smcap">Miss Treable</span>, <i>and throwing her arms round -her</i>) What, dearest Treaby! Crying!—(<i>cross</i> -<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>coming</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) Martelli has upset her.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> Again! Oh, the wretch! How I -wish that my guardian would send her away! -(<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> You have only to—to—to ask! -Could he—is there a man who—who could—anything, -anything, Margaret! Oh!</p> - -<p class="center"><i>(He flies, overcome with confusion, and</i> <span class="smcap">Exit</span> -<i>back</i> <span class="smcap">L. 3 E.</span>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> Poor Everard! (<i>she gazes pensively -after him for a moment—then turns to</i> <span class="smcap">Miss -Treable</span> <i>again</i>) Do not cry! I will speak to -Sir Joseph; he shall see that this woman makes -me unhappy.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> (<i>drying her eyes</i>) Dearest Margaret!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret</span> (<i>looking around—sitting chair</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) -Oh, how my heart beats when I find myself in -his room!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> He is the grandest, greatest of -men—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> In this morning's paper they men<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_10" id="Page_10">[Pg 10]</a></span>tion -his name three times. And they've his portrait -in the Sketch!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> And so like him!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> His speech in that copyright case -yesterday! His triumph!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> I felt you quiver as you sat beside -me—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> He saw us there, I think.... As his -eye swept past, I noticed a tremble in his voice. -And, after that, I felt that he was speaking—for -me!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> His peroration was sublime.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>rise, down</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>and sit in chair</i>) -It was odious of that old man's daughter to thank -him so effusively. I detest Lady Claude!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> (<i>rising and</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Jealous, my Margaret? -They knew each other, in the long ago. -I have an idea that he once—but he has not her -photograph! I came here to see!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> It is not on the mantelpiece.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> Nor in his desk. I looked!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> Oh! You should not have done -that!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> There is no limit to my devotion. It -is true Lady Claude is handsome.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>indignantly</i>) Handsome! A -widow—and old! Why, she's thirty-five, at least!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> (<i>tartly away</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>) My age, Margaret!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>rise and across to her</i>) Ah, dear -Treaby, forgive me! But—when I am here—in -his room—and think of—a possible rival! (<i>up to -desk</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) Here, where he sits, and works! Every -day I steal in, and let fall a flower. I love to -think of him kissing that flower, perhaps—who -knows, wearing it next his heart! If he only -would speak to me! Little girl, he calls me, then -turns his eyes timidly away. Little girl! Oh -never did lover's epithet sound so sweet!</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_11" id="Page_11">[Pg 11]</a></span></p> - -<p class="center">(<i>Since having the flowers</i> <span class="smcap">Margaret</span> <i>has been undoing -them and dropping them about the room</i>.) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> (<i>sit on settee</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>) I have seen him, -when your name was mentioned, change colour, -and murmur something beneath his breath.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>sit on stool</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>) What was it? -Oh, what?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> Nay, I could not catch. But Margaret, -tell me—Everard has been imploring—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>softly</i>) Ah, poor Everard! It -was not till you opened my eyes, dear Treaby, -that I—of course I am fond of Everard—oh, very -fond! But—can I hesitate! Between a boy—and -a great man—a leader of men! Dear Treaby, -(<i>rise and up</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) I beseech you—leave me here, -for a moment!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> (<i>rise and up</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) I go, dear child, -I go—I feel that my eyes are red—I must wash -away these tears. Plead for me with your guardian, -Margaret—rid us of the hateful Martelli!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>round to</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span> <i>and embracing</i> -<span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span>) I will try—oh, I will try!</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<span class="smcap">Miss Treable</span> <i>kisses her devotedly and goes</i> <span class="smcap">L. -3 E.</span> <span class="smcap">Margaret</span>, <i>after a glance round the room, -to make sure she is unobserved, takes a rose, -kisses it, and lays it on</i> <span class="smcap">Sir Joseph's</span> <i>desk—up</i> -<span class="smcap">C. R.</span> <i>of desk</i>.)</p></div> - -<p>Speak for me, rose, and tell him of my love! Lie -fondly on his heart, dear rose!</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<span class="smcap">Sir Joseph's</span> <i>voice is heard outside, talking to</i> -<span class="smcap">Mrs. Mar.</span> <span class="smcap">Margaret</span> <i>starts and retreats to -down</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span> <i>enters from</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>talking to</i> -<span class="smcap">Mrs. Martelli</span>.)</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Come, come, Mrs. Martelli, she -didn't mean anything! She couldn't have, you<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_12" id="Page_12">[Pg 12]</a></span> -know! (<i>he sees</i> <span class="smcap">Margaret</span>) Ah, little girl, you -there? Er—er—Mrs. Martelli and I—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) I go, guardian, I go! But—one -word—for poor Miss Treable. She is the only -friend I have in the world!</p> - -<p class="center">(<i>She goes out</i> <span class="smcap">L. 3 E.</span>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) There, you hear that? The only -friend she has in the world! Now, can I send her -away? (<i>up to desk and sitting</i>) I put it to you!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mrs. Mar.</span> (<i>grimly</i>) Every companion Miss -Messilent has had has been her only friend. And -let the lady stay by all means, Sir Joseph. (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) -Only you will permit me to take my departure.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>very annoyed, sitting at his desk, taking -up the rose and dropping it in the waste-paper -basket</i>) I wish that girl wouldn't let her confounded -flowers trail all over the place! Why -does she come in here? Can't I have one room -in the house to myself?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mrs. Mar.</span> (<i>picking up flowers which</i> <span class="smcap">Margaret</span> -<i>has dropped</i>) That was precisely the cause of my -altercation with Miss Treable, Sir Joseph. I -found her inspecting the photographs on the -mantelpiece.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Confound her impudence! I'll say a -word to her. We'd better keep the door locked -in future, eh?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mrs. Mar.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>adamant</i>) You will have to -choose, Sir Joseph, between Miss Treable and me.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>wheedling, rise and down</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Come, -come, Mrs. Martelli, you and I have been together -too long to allow a trifle like this to part us. -Besides, we're all going off in a day or two—Miss -Treable may get married in the Long Vacation—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mrs. M.</span> Married—she! She'll never see forty -again!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Won't she, though? Well, after all,<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_13" id="Page_13">[Pg 13]</a></span> -that's no concern of mine. <i>I</i> don't want her to -see forty again—for the matter of that I don't -want to see <i>her</i> again. But she's the girl's companion—and -the girl must have a companion—and -if the Treable woman goes I shall have to -find another companion. That's so, isn't it?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mrs. Mar.</span> (<i>still adamant</i>) Sir Joseph—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> And I want to be off to Scotland to-morrow! -Come, come, Mrs. Martelli—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mrs. Mar.</span> Sir Joseph, that person has made -use of certain expressions to me that render further -residence with her under the same roof impossible. -I regret it—for my dear husband's sake, -I regret it. But you will have to choose.</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<i>She goes</i> <span class="smcap">R. I. E.</span> <i>with majesty</i>. <span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span> <i>is exceedingly -vexed. He pishes and pshaws, seizes -his blotting pad, hurls it to the other end of -the room, then goes and fetches it—then -takes up paper</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>and reads, swearing softly -to himself</i>. <span class="smcap">Peters</span>, <i>the butler</i>, <i>enters</i> <span class="smcap">L. 3 E.</span>)</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Peters.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) Mr. Mollentrave and Lady -Claude Derenham have called, Sir Joseph.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>puts paper down eagerly</i>, <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Ah, -I'll go down. They're in the drawing-room, I -suppose?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Peters.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) No, Sir Joseph—Miss Messilent -and Miss Treable are playing a duet in -the drawing-room—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>discontentedly</i>) Ah—in the library, -then?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Peters.</span> No, Sir Joseph—Mr. Swenboys is -smoking a pipe in the library—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>furious</i>) Not a room in my house! -Where in Heaven's name are they?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Peters.</span> In the dining-room, Sir Joseph.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>stamping his foot</i>) The dining-room! -Bring them up here, Peters—quick!</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_14" id="Page_14">[Pg 14]</a></span></p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<span class="smcap">Peters</span> <i>goes</i> <span class="smcap">L. 3 E.</span> <span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span> <i>goes to glass</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> -<i>and arranges tie, etc.</i> <span class="smcap">Peters</span> <i>returns with</i> -<span class="smcap">Mr. Mollentrave</span> <i>and</i> <span class="smcap">Lady Claude</span>. <span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> -<i>is a very old man, with masses of snow-white -hair; notwithstanding his age, he is alert -and agile, with no trace of feebleness</i>. <span class="smcap">Lady -Claude</span> <i>is a beautiful and fascinating woman</i>. -<span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> <i>enters, shakes hands with</i> <span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> <span class="smcap">C.</span>, -<i>and gets away</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span> <i>as</i> <span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> <i>enters</i>.)</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>with outstretched hands</i>—<span class="smcap">C.</span>) My -dear Balsted! Forgive this intrusion. But I had -to come and congratulate you again on the way -you conducted my case. You were masterly! -Masterly.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) You are very good, Mr. Mollentrave. -Our copyright law is intricate. (<span class="smcap">Mol.</span> -<i>crosses behind</i> <span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> <i>to</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>and undoes book</i>) It -was a very nice point (<i>he shakes hands with</i> -<span class="smcap">Lady Claude</span>) And you, Lady Claude, are you -pleased?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Need you ask, when my book -was in question! Rosamund is naturally proud -of her father's work!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) And I am especially glad of -the opportunity the case has given me of renewing -an ancient friendship.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) Yes—we are very old friends, you -and I! You have been abroad a long time?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Yes—in Italy—since my husband's -death.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I trust you have now returned for -good?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>comes</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>a step</i>) I don't mean to -part with her any more, Balsted! Italian cypresses -may set off a widow's weeds—but now, -that two years have passed! (<span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> <i>sits on -stool. He produces a book</i>) Balsted, I have -taken the liberty to bring you my book—the <i>casus<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_15" id="Page_15">[Pg 15]</a></span> -belli</i>—with an autograph inscription. (<span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>he -presents it with a flourish</i>) Allow me to offer it -to you!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>taking it</i>) I am very much obliged.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>rubbing his hands</i>) "Mollentrave -on Women!" I venture to say it is in a -fair way to become a classic.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>smiling</i>) He has given away all our -secrets!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> I was an observer from boyhood. -Like Dante, I fell in love at the age of nine. Unlike -Dante, I made notes. In the interests of my -self-imposed study I married three times. (<i>by -chair</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>) In short, you will find, between these -covers, a most careful, complete investigation on -scientific principles, of the baffling, perplexing -creature known to us as <span class="smcap">Woman</span>!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>in smiling protest</i>) Papa!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>comes</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>a step</i>) Your pardon, my -child! You are, of course, the topmost blossom -of the spreading tree. You have inherited, if I -may say so, my mental energy.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>fingering the book</i>) I am disappointed -that Lady Claude's photograph does not -figure as frontispiece.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Ha, ha, very good! (<i>away</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>and -returning</i>) But—in all seriousness (<i>takes book</i>), -Balsted—it is a guide, a hand-book, a Baedeker! -It conducts you personally to the most hidden -recesses of the feminine heart, opens every door, -strips every cupboard! (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) No marriage -license should be issued to the man who cannot -pass his examination in Mollentrave! (<i>Goes</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> -<i>to table and puts book down</i>) As a result there -would be cobwebs in the Divorce Court! You -practise there, by the way?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Heaven forbid! No—I am on the Chancery -side—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) Ah—that's a pity—I should<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_16" id="Page_16">[Pg 16]</a></span> -have valued expert criticism. I am at present -revising the book for its next edition—which will -be the twenty-third!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>on his</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>) The twenty-third? -Really!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> My dear sir, the work has been translated -into every living tongue. I am told there -are women's clubs where it is the custom solemnly -to execrate me after dinner. In Dover Street "to -be mollentraved" has passed into the language. -It means—to be found out!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>rising</i>) Papa, we must not take up -Sir Joseph's time.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> On the contrary! And my interviews -with you have been too brief, these many years -past, for me to desire to curtail them. Besides, -I find myself to-day in a position of some perplexity—and -truly, should value your advice!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>archly</i>) Mine—or papa's?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Both! Please sit down. Will you listen -to my tale of woe?</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> <i>sits settee</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Gladly. It is the least we can do -for you, after your magnificent service. (<span class="smcap">Mol.</span> -<i>gets chair</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>and sits</i>)</p> - -<p class="center">(<i>They sit.</i>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>sits up</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>front of desk</i>) Well then, -here goes! As you are aware, I am unmarried. -Many years ago (<i>he looks at</i> <span class="smcap">Lady Claude</span> <i>who -drops her eyes</i>) I loved a lady, who, very wisely, -preferred another. (<span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> <i>points waggishly -to the book</i>) Ah, Mr. Mollentrave, had I -then been able to consult your work!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> I was labouring at it for twenty -years before I gave it to the world.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> My misfortune to have been born too<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_17" id="Page_17">[Pg 17]</a></span> -soon! Well, I settled down to single blessedness, -and worked hard. My existence was tranquil. -An elderly lady, widow of a man I had known, -kept house for me, and left me undisturbed. My -life was all work, with an occasional game at -bridge. I had never been a ... lady's man ... -the sex did not—let us say, appreciate me—and I, -while admiring them from a distance, have -avoided their closer neighborhood.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> My dear friend, you have denied -yourself one of the most fruitful sources of amusement!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> That may be, but I am constitutionally -shy. And law and politics, you see, took up all -my time—I settled down—contentedly enough, -into old fogeydom. My one care was a nephew, -a good lad, who walked the hospitals and has just -passed his final exam. Well, so far all was untroubled. -But now comes the catastrophe. A -year ago an old friend of mine died in Australia—a -companion of my boyhood—and bequeathed -me—his daughter!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>alert</i>) Ah!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> His motherless daughter! I received -her letter by the morning's post—she came in the -afternoon! A girl! Imagine it! My austere -dwelling invaded by a bouncing, flouncing girl!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>chuckling</i>) Terrible!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> It <i>was</i> terrible. Lady Claude will excuse -me—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>smiling</i>) Oh yes!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> My feelings at that moment could only -be expressed in camera. There was no way out—he -had appointed me her guardian—it was a -sacred trust—I could do nothing. (<i>rise</i>) She -was too old to send to school—too young to live -alone. And here was I, to whom girls are esoteric, -mysterious things, of strange, uncanny ways—I, -who don't know what to say to them, how to<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_18" id="Page_18">[Pg 18]</a></span> -feed them or amuse them, I who go into no -society, have no small-talk, don't dance or play -ping-pong—here was I suddenly overwhelmed by -this avalanche of laces and muslins!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Heaven sent you a full-grown -daughter, without the expensive preliminaries!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Let us hope Heaven meant it kindly—but -there are occasions, doubtless, when even -Providence nods! Well, after a considerable -struggle with myself, I accepted the inevitable. I -moved from my comfortable bachelor's quarters, -took this house, found her a companion—who at -once proceeded to quarrel with the housekeeper. -I had to dismiss her and engage another—the same -story! (<i>sits on settee</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>by</i> <span class="smcap">Lady C.</span>) In twelve -months I have had five companions. To-day another -disturbance—for the sixth time I am bidden -choose between them—and I had hoped to go to -Scotland to-morrow. This may all sound very -trivial—but truly I'm in despair!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>laughing</i>) Poor Sir Joseph!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>rise and go</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span> <i>Earnestly</i>) My -dear child, I can enter into our friend's feelings—this -is no laughing matter!—Tell me now, Balsted—what -is she like, your ward?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>puzzled</i>) Like? Like all other girls, I -imagine. I scarcely have looked at her. Pretty, I -suppose, in a feeble kind of way. I have said -good morning and good evening, taken her to an -occasional theatre, and allowed her to prattle. -She is only a child.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>quickly</i>) A mistake! They <i>never</i> -are children!—How old is she?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Eighteen, I believe—or nineteen, perhaps—possibly -twenty.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Of the sentimental order?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>laughing</i>) Truly, I've no idea!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> At least you can tell me her taste -in literature?</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_19" id="Page_19">[Pg 19]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>searching in his memory</i>) Literature? -She reads a good deal—though what, I've -no notion. Stay, though—I remember, one night -when I couldn't sleep, taking a book of hers upstairs, -and having a superb night's rest. It was -Somebody's Love-Letters.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> The Englishwoman's?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Yes. That was it.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Good. Were passages marked?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> The pages were peppered with lines -and crosses.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> The boards protected with a cover?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I rather imagine they were.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Notes scribbled on the margin?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I fancy so—yes, I am sure! Heaps of -'em!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Clue No. 1. Perfect. (<i>triumphant</i>) -In her clothing she will affect the darker shades?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>with an effort at memory</i>) Er—yes—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Fond of flowers?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> She litters the place with them!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> I have her! Devours poetry, of -course? Adores Wagner? Appetite languid, -member of the Stage Society, and worships -Ibsen?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> The name's familiar—I've heard her -mention it—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Of course! My dear fellow, I haven't -seen the lady—and I prefer, as a rule, to visit the -patient before pronouncing upon her case. But -here all is simple, and there is no further need of -analysis. She belongs to the large class, known -as <i>Invertebrate Sentimentalists</i>. (<i>away</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>rise and go</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) The deuce she does!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Harmless, my dear fellow—quite -harmless! Now tell me—your nephew?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Yes?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Has he been here all the time?</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_20" id="Page_20">[Pg 20]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> The last month only—he studied in -Germany.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Good. A normal, healthy lad?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Quite.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Age?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Twenty-four or twenty-five.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> A little melancholy lately?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Ah! The fact is. I <i>have</i> noticed—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> With the quickness of the trained -advocate you have guessed my drift! My dear -sir, your troubles are at an end. To restore your -tranquillity, all you need do is to—add the ward -to the nephew!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>gleefully</i>) By Jove! I should never -have thought of it!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> That is where <i>I</i> come in. You talked -of a will—she has money?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Ten thousand pounds.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Admirable. Now listen—</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> <i>rises and goes up</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>sit in chair</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>down stage</i>) It -will take you exactly ten minutes. You will send -for your nephew—meet him coldly—wave him to -a chair. A set frown on your face. You will tell -him severely you have detected his secret, (<span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> -<i>sits</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) remarked his passion for your ward. You -will upbraid him—remember, his adoration is -certain! He will confess and beat his bosom. -Then you melt—and send for the maiden.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>alarmed</i>) I? I speak to her? -Never!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> In the interests of celerity! If you -leave it to him he will bungle it. He will be abject, -and she tyrannical. She will say "no" for -certain, to see how he takes it. She will demand -time—in short, there will be delay. You will -find all this set down in my fourteenth chapter, -called "The Cat and the Mouse."</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_21" id="Page_21">[Pg 21]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>rise and down stage</i>) I can't do it, -Mollentrave. I shouldn't know what to say!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>rise, put chair back</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>) You, the -great orator! Imagine you're addressing a jury -of—girls! Wallow in sentiment—reek of it! -(<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Put the boy's love—draw a pathetic picture—tears -in your voice, and so on! In a minute -she'll cry, and accept him! Oh, I guarantee -the complete success of the operation! And see -here—Rosy and I are going to Swanage to-morrow—why -not join us there, with the young -couple?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) That's exceedingly good of you—I -had meant to trot off to Scotland—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> You can't—at once! Remember—they -are engaged! But you can go in a day or -two, and leave them with us. The house is large.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Really—that is too kind—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Copy for me, my dear fellow—They'll -be under the microscope, but they won't -know. (<span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> <i>comes down</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) And I'll -give the boy some wrinkles. You'll come?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>turn</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>) Does Lady Claude join in -the invitation?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Most cordially.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> So that's all settled. (<i>He gets up, -goes to the back, and proceeds to wrestle with his -overcoat</i>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>to</i> <span class="smcap">Lady Claude</span>) Though I should -ask you to explain a few points in your father's -work?</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<span class="smcap">Mollen.</span>, <i>seized by a sudden inspiration, takes -book, sits on settee, and turns down pages</i> <span class="smcap">Sir -J.</span> <i>will have to consult</i>.)</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span> <i>merrily</i>) It contains an index, -an appendix, and a glossary.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I am very dull. If I needed help—</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_22" id="Page_22">[Pg 22]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> The book will tell you how dangerous -it is to invite a woman's assistance.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> But suppose I seek the danger?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> There is a chapter on widows.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Which I shall not read. There <i>you</i> -shall be my author.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> <i>My</i> book is to be on man.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> If you need a collaborator!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> I shall ask your ward to assist—But, -Sir Joseph, I thought you could not talk to -women?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I cannot—but there is one, all these -years, to whom I have said so much, and so -often!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> I am glad you have made an exception. -Well, you know where we live, at Swanage?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I have not forgotten—I have a memory.... -There was an elm-tree there—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Which still remains, though it has -grown older! (<span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> <i>bustles up</i>) To-morrow -then? You will let us know by what train? -Good-bye—and you have my best wishes. (B. -<i>goes up to door</i> <span class="smcap">L. 3 E.</span>) Papa (<i>goes up</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>and</i> -<span class="smcap">Exit L. 3 E.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>rise, round back</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>to</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) Yes—send -us a wire! Good-bye, my dear fellow. And -remember—gallons of sentiment!</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> <i>turns to the door; as he goes</i> <span class="smcap">Sir -Joseph</span> <i>clutches him</i>.) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>away</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Mollentrave, I can't do -it! I can't! At the mere thought of it I feel a -chill down my spine. I can't!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>coming</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) Balsted!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Look here, why not speak to her yourself?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> I?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Why not? It's your business, after<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_23" id="Page_23">[Pg 23]</a></span> -all, this sort of thing. (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) You're an expert, a -professional. I won your case for you yesterday—win -mine for me now!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) But it's a delicate subject -to bring before a lady one has never met before—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I'll introduce you in proper form—tell -her you are my mouthpiece—Oh, I'll make <i>that</i> -all right. And I'll be there, of course, while you—do -it—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Naturally, if you insist—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I do—You will?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Certainly—though—(<i>getting away</i> -<span class="smcap">L.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>following him to</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>) I'm immensely -grateful! I'll send for the boy at once and talk -to him. I can manage <i>that</i> part. You'll see -Lady Claude into her carriage, walk to the corner -of the street and come back. Then, if you're -right about him—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> <i>If</i> I'm right!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) You will put the other little -matter before her, in your own inimitable fashion. -Eh?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">L.</span>) I'll be back in ten minutes.</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> <i>exits</i> <span class="smcap">L. 3 E.</span> <span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span> <i>has rung</i> -<span class="smcap">R.</span> <span class="smcap">Peters</span> <i>comes in</i> <span class="smcap">L. 3 E.</span>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Tell Mr. Swenboys I want him.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Peters.</span> Yes, Sir Joseph.</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<span class="smcap">Peters</span> <i>goes</i> <span class="smcap">L. 3 E.</span> <span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span> <i>hums cheerfully, -takes up the book, and glances at it</i>. <span class="smcap">Everard</span> -<i>enters</i>. <span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> <i>frowns, throws down book and -waves him to a chair</i>.)</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) You want me, uncle?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Yes, sit down, sit down. (<span class="smcap">Everard</span> -<i>sits on stool</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) Oh, Everard!</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_24" id="Page_24">[Pg 24]</a></span></p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> <i>sits in chair</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>down stage</i>.) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>wonderingly</i>) Why, uncle, what is -it? Have I done anything?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Done anything, unhappy boy! (<i>He -pauses, perplexedly, then resumes, with melodrama</i>) -I should never have believed it—never!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>rise and going</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) But, uncle, tell -me—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>waving him back</i>) If ever a trust was -sacred ... if ever a man had a right to expect—and -you—you!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>in absolute dismay</i>) Why—what—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Isn't the world full of girls whom you -could fall in love with? Don't they—pullulate? -Aren't there a hundred thousand more women -than men in London alone? And must you -select, out of them all, the very one whom you—shouldn't?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>sinking his head</i>) That wretched -Treable woman has told you about the verses!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Verses! You stooped to verses!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>humbly</i>) I cribbed them.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> An attempt to obtain credit—under -false pretences! Confess it then, degenerate boy! -You love my ward!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>drawing himself up</i>) Uncle, I do! -With every drop of my blood!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>delighted, but simulating great grief</i>) -Ha! It is true then!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> I was wrong—there is no doubt I -was wrong. But could I help it—put it that way—how -could I?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I must decline to put it that way.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>passionately</i>) Why did you let me -come here, and be in her presence, day after day? -How live in the same house with her, sit opposite -her at meals, and not adore? How look upon<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_25" id="Page_25">[Pg 25]</a></span> -that matchless face, listen to the sound of her -voice, its silvery music (<i>down</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>) and not—fall -prostrate?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>making a note on his shirt-cuff</i>) -Matchless face—silvery music—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>to</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) I worship her, uncle! -She is the—very star and loadstone of my existence, -the—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>rise</i>) I see. But, tell me—have you -said all this—to her?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>mournfully</i>) To her not a -word! My fingers may have pleaded, as I passed -the bread and butter—my eyes may have spoken—but -my lips—never! The verses, the fatal -verses, merely compared her to the (<i>away</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) -Capitoline Venus—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) And the Venus, I suppose, -wasn't in it?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>up to him</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Ah, uncle, don't -make fun of me! I confess my fault to you -frankly—I know it was wrong—I've always -known it. Send me away, sir—I'll do what you -bid me. Get me a berth in Africa where the -climate's deadliest (<i>sit</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>front of table</i>) I'll go -without a word—and you'll soon be rid of me!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) But, my dear lad, I don't -want to be rid of you—and I'm not sure that I -altogether approve of the deadly climate scheme. -All I say is—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> You can say nothing to me that I -have not said already to myself—ah, many times! -(<i>rise</i>) It was a presumption—a mad presumption. -Don't be too hard on me!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>gravely</i>) Everard, I've tried to do my -duty by you—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> You have been more than a father -to me. Be merciful, sir!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I will, I will.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> All I ask is—</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_26" id="Page_26">[Pg 26]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> All <i>I</i> ask is that we now drop heroics -and descend to more commonplace ground. -Leave Olympus and return to the London pavement——</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span> <i>bewildered</i>) I don't understand—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Why, after all, when one comes -to think of it, there is no especial crime in a young -man falling in love with a young woman—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) A young woman! Margaret!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> A young goddess, then—but still, it is -not unnatural. And, as I say, I don't see—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>springing wildly to his feet</i>) You -don't mean that there is a hope for me!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> But I do, I do! I have reason to believe -that she is not altogether indifferent.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>gasping</i>) Uncle!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Has she given you no sign?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>shyly</i>) When we played chess last -Thursday, she allowed her hand to rest on mine -for the appreciable fraction of a second—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>triumphantly</i>) You see! Mollentrave -on Women—the text-book on the subject—would, -I am sure, interpret that as encouragement.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> Uncle! Don't tell me that you -think—(<i>he rushes wildly about the room</i>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> But I do, I do! What's more, I am -convinced! Come, my boy, sit down. (<span class="smcap">Everard</span> -<i>down</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>back to</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> <i>seizes him and sits him</i> -<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) and don't pace the room like an undischarged -bankrupt. (<i>sits</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) Let us discuss the -matter.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> Margaret to be mine!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Again I say, why not? I shall buy you -a practice as a wedding-present, and—as they say -in the fairy-stories, you will live happily ever -after. Do you authorize me to—sound the lady?</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_27" id="Page_27">[Pg 27]</a></span></p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Everard</span> <i>rises and away</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>)</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> <i>comes bustling into the room</i> -<span class="smcap">L. 3 E.</span>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>rise</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>—<i>going eagerly to him and whispering -into his ear</i>) Splendid, Mollentrave, -splendid! (<i>aloud</i>) Let me introduce my nephew, -Mr. Everard Swenboys. Everard, this is an old -friend of mine—whom we can admit to our -fullest confidence. (<i>down</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) Mollentrave—my -nephew has just confessed to me that he loves my -ward!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) You don't say so! Remarkable! -Really! (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span> <i>puts hat down table</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> -<i>and crosses to down</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I have your authority, Everard, to—ask -the lady?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Oh, uncle, if you would! -One word from you!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Very well, then—send her to me! At -once!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>with a look at</i> <span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span>) -Now, uncle? Had we not better—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Now! The court of Love is sitting! -(<span class="smcap">Everard</span> <i>crosses to</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>) Go, my boy—and tell -her to be quick!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>shakes his uncle violently by the hand, -then rushes out of the room</i> <span class="smcap">L. 3 E.</span> <span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span> -<i>turns to</i> <span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> <i>down</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>with enthusiasm</i>, -<span class="smcap">C.</span>) You're a wizard, you know! It's marvellous! -Look here, I made a note or two for you—matchless -face, silvery music of her voice—you -might bring those in—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Startingly original, aren't they? -You'll find half a dozen really <i>new</i> superlatives -in my book. So it seems I wasn't wrong, eh? -(<i>goes</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>by fireplace</i>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) Extraordinary! If only you're -right about her.</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_28" id="Page_28">[Pg 28]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> We shall see. My dear friend, I have -other cases on hand besides this. (<i>comes</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) -Have you met Lord Contareen?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> No—I don't think so.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> I am, shall I say, "steering" <i>him</i>. -He's in love with my—with a lady, and the lady -loves him—without knowing it. (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) I give -you my word she has refused him, although she -adores him—merely <i>because</i> she doesn't know.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) Funny! But <i>you</i> know, eh?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> <i>I</i> know, by what I call consequential -induction; and by the same process I'll answer -for your ward. By the way what will you do -while I—plead?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Just go and sit at my desk, eh? (<i>sit</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> -<i>of desk</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Yes—that will be best. It won't -take long. I hope she'll come soon! (<i>down</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>) -though! Ah—</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<span class="smcap">Margaret</span> <i>has come into the room</i> <span class="smcap">L. 3 E.</span>; <i>she -goes to</i> <span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span> <i>and does not at first notice</i> -<span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> <i>who is at back</i>.)</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>of desk</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) You wish to speak -to me, guardian?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>very embarrassed</i>) Yes—er—yes.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> About Miss Treable? Oh, believe -me, she is the o—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>rising down</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>very fidgety and awkward</i>) -No, no, it's not about Miss Treable. Let -me introduce you to Mr. Mollentrave. Mollentrave, -this is my ward, Miss Messilent.</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Marg.</span> <i>comes down</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>bowing</i>) I am exceedingly -happy to make Miss Messilent's acquaintance.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>picking his words with considerable<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_29" id="Page_29">[Pg 29]</a></span> -effort and difficulty</i>) Margaret, you will possibly—consider -it strange—but the fact is—there is -something—that I ought to have—said to you—myself—before -to-day perhaps (<span class="smcap">C.</span>)—but it's a—delicate -matter—and you know what a rugged -old bear I am—and—well, Everard's not much -better—and here's Mr. Mollentrave—a very old -friend—and he—well, you see, I told him of my—of -our—dilemma—and he, in the kindest way in -the world—eh, Mollentrave?—well, he'll just tell -you, you see, and I'll finish—what I was doing.</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<i>He beats a hasty retreat to his desk and buries -himself in his papers.</i> <span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> <i>advances, -smiling and mincing</i>.)</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>very volubly</i>) My dear Miss -Messilent, I find myself in a rather embarrassing -position. Your guardian, who as you are aware, -has, in the most charming manner possible, retained -all the shyness of youth in the presence of -your adorable sex, has deputed me to speak for -him, phrase his sentiments, express his pious desires—in -a word, act as his mouthpiece in introducing -to your notice a subject that I trust will -enlist all your sympathy. Have I your permission?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span> <i>her eyes roaming from him to</i> -<span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span>) Certainly.</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Marg.</span> <i>sits stool</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span> <span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> <i>takes chair from</i> -<span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>and sits</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>sitting</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) My dear young lady, -the sixty years that have passed over my head, -furrowing my brow and blanching my hair, give -me at least the privilege to address you with a -certain paternal simplicity, a mild but glowing -benevolence. Can you, without too great a -stretch of the imagination, look on me, for a very<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_30" id="Page_30">[Pg 30]</a></span> -brief moment, as though I were actually your -guardian?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>more and more puzzled</i>) If you -wish it.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Ten thousand thanks. You simplify -my task. Because the theme on which I have to -dwell is not one that can be coldly attacked—scarred -veteran as I am, there are still feeble pulsations -in my heart when I breathe the magic -word—Love! (<i>He looks searchingly at her</i>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret</span>. (<i>startled</i>) Love! (<i>she throws a -quick glance at</i> <span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span>, <i>who dives down -deeper behind his desk</i>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>with much sentiment</i>) Love! I -am fresh from hearing a man tell of his love—oh, -the word is too cold!—of his deep, overpowering -passion! Miss Messilent, I am still under the -spell! I have been the recipient, in my time, of -many confidences—but never have I met a creature -so absolutely enslaved by the divine emotion, -so eager a captive in the chains of beauty—as is -this lover—of yours! (<i>Both rise</i>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> Of mine! Mine! Me!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Who but you? Are you not—but -forgive me if my advocacy becomes too ardent! -(<i>puts chair back</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>and goes up to</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>of</i> <span class="smcap">Sir J.</span>) -It is your guardian who should be saying these -things—but I speak for him, I am the reed into -which he has blown! (<span class="smcap">Marg.</span> <i>kneels on stool and -is facing</i> <span class="smcap">Sir J.</span>) It is your guardian who wishes -to know whether this man, this lover of yours -(<i>comes</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) this man who yearns for you, who for -the last month has been your satellite, shining -with your radiance and dark with your darkness, -who has set up a temple in his soul whereof you -are the goddess—whether this man shall be flung -by you into the shadows of hopeless misery, or -be made immortal by the knowledge that you—return—his -passion!</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_31" id="Page_31">[Pg 31]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>off stool and sitting</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span> <i>looking -glowingly at</i> <span class="smcap">Sir J.</span>) Yes! Yes! Tell him yes!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>beaming</i>) Ha! You can accord -him, then, a small fragment of—your affection?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> Can he doubt it! Oh, he is so -much above me! I had never dared to hope!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>triumphantly</i>) Miss Messilent, nor -he, I assure you—nor he! (<i>away</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Ah, -lovers, lovers! Then your guardian may tell Mr. -Swenboys—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>sinking her head</i>) Ah—poor Everard!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span>(<span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>smiling</i>) Poor Everard! I -don't think we need pity <i>him</i>! (<i>She rises</i>) Miss -Messilent, I have fulfilled my mission, and now I -will leave you. I relinquish my paternal role -with regret, with considerable regret—and join -the ranks of your other admirers. Miss Messilent, -I kiss your hand!</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> <i>rises and steps forward: he is beaming with -joy</i>. <span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> <i>bows to her and crosses her -over to his</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>and goes to the door</i> <span class="smcap">L. 3 E.</span> <span class="smcap">Sir -Joseph</span> <i>rises, accompanying him</i>. <span class="smcap">Margaret</span> -<i>remains standing</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>as though entranced</i>.)</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>at the door, to</i> <span class="smcap">Sir J.</span>) Rather -good, eh, don't you think, for an impromptu?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) Good! Magnificent! How -can I thank you?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Tut, tut, I've enjoyed it. Now make -her name the day while the ecstatic mood's still -on her! Good-bye! Till to-morrow!</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> <i>goes</i> <span class="smcap">L. 3 E.</span>)</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span> <i>returns to</i> <span class="smcap">Margaret</span>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>all his awkwardness returning</i>)<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_32" id="Page_32">[Pg 32]</a></span> -My dear—Margaret, I am really most glad—most -glad. And Everard—well, well, I need say nothing -about Everard. And now that we—know—will -you regard me as—inconsiderate—if I press -for an—early—marriage?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>coyly</i>) Sir Joseph!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>on her</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>) You will have to—er—drop -that title soon, my dear and address me—er—less -formally.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> Not yet, not yet! Give me time.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>a little surprised</i>) Certainly, certainly—but -I trust it will not be too long. And -now, one final word. My—er—guardianship will -soon be at an end—but I have tried—to—er—fulfil -its duties. And I trust that—er—er—you will -never regret the—er—step—you are taking to-day!</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<i>He goes to her, cordially holding out both his -hands.</i> <span class="smcap">Margaret</span> <i>is about to throw herself -into his arms when the door opens and</i> <span class="smcap">Mrs. -Martelli</span> <i>appears</i> <span class="smcap">R. 1 E.</span> <i>She pauses, aghast.</i> -<span class="smcap">Margaret</span> <i>with a smothered cry, rushes out of -the room</i> <span class="smcap">L. 3 E.</span>)</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mrs. M.</span> Sir Joseph! (<span class="smcap">R.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>gleefully</i>) Well, Mrs. Martelli?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mrs. M.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>standing grimly on the threshold</i>) -I hope I do not intrude.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) By no means, by no means! We -had finished! Ah, Mrs. Martelli, there will soon -be an end to Miss Treable!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mrs. Mar.</span> (<i>open-mouthed</i>) Sir Joseph! -(<i>with suppressed indignation</i>) I came to tell -you that your clerk is still waiting below.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Noyes! Ah, I had forgotten about -Noyes! Send him up, (<i>across to</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>) please. Oh, -it's splendid, Mrs. Martelli—splendid!</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_33" id="Page_33">[Pg 33]</a></span></p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Mrs. Martelli</span> <i>exits</i> <span class="smcap">R. 1 E.</span>)</p> - -<p class="center">(<i>The door at back opens and</i> <span class="smcap">Everard</span> <i>appears</i>.) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> Uncle!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>rushing to him, and slapping him -on the back</i>) Everard! It's all right! Go to -her, my boy!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span> <i>gasping</i>) Uncle!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Go to her! She adores you! Unworthy, -et-cetera—never dared to look so high! Oh, -you couple of idiots! Give her the classic kiss, -and get her to name the day! She has promised -to make it soon. Quick, now—she's waiting!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> Uncle!</p> - -<p class="center">(<i>He rushes out wildly back</i> <span class="smcap">L. 3 E.</span> <span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span> -<i>returns to</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <span class="smcap">Noyes</span> <i>enters</i> <span class="smcap">R. 1 E.</span>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Ah, Noyes, I forgot about you! -Here—a present. Take it and read it! (<i>He -hands him the book</i>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Noyes.</span> (<span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>looking at the cover</i>) "Mollentrave -on Women." (<i>he stares</i>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>takes book away from</i> <span class="smcap">Noyes</span>) -Stay though—it's an autograph copy—you must -buy one for yourself! Hurrooh! He knows a -thing or two, that old man. Well, now what -news?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Noyes.</span> (<span class="smcap">R.</span>) I merely called to see whether -you were going to Scotland to-morrow, Sir -Joseph.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> No—not to-morrow—I must alter my -plans for a bit. Everard's going to marry my -ward, Noyes. A bit of luck, eh? We must see -about settlements, and so on. And buy the lad a -practice. There are agents for that sort of thing, -eh?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Noyes.</span> Certainly, Sir Joseph. And permit -me to congratulate you.</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_34" id="Page_34">[Pg 34]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Thank you, thank you! And enquire -about the practice—at once!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Noyes.</span> Have you any preference as regards -locality?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> H'm—a pleasant suburb—not <i>quite</i> too -near town, eh? Noyes? One doesn't want to be -<i>too</i> close—to the felicity of the young couple? -Turtle-doves demand solitude. Oh, blessings on -Mollentrave!</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Everard</span> <i>returns</i> <span class="smcap">L. 3 E.</span> <i>the picture of hopeless -despair</i>.) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) Hullo, what's this?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) Uncle, she thinks you meant -you!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>leaping up</i>) What!!!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> She thinks you meant <span class="smcap">You</span>!! That -you were proposing for yourself! She says she's -engaged to—YOU!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>shaking him</i>) Speak, can't you? -What do you mean?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>brokenly</i>) She does. I didn't undeceive -her. How could I? <i>She's happy</i>—<i>she -loves</i> you—she'll <i>marry</i> you! Oh!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Oh! Mollentrave!</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<span class="smcap">Ever.</span> <i>buries his head in his hands and sinks into -settee</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span> <i>stands</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>shouting between -his clenched teeth</i>—"Oh, <span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span>!")</p></div> - -<p class="center">CURTAIN. -</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_35" id="Page_35">[Pg 35]</a></span></p> -<div class="chapter"></div> -<hr class="chap" /> - - - - -<h2><a name="ACT_II" id="ACT_II">ACT II.</a></h2> - - -<p class="center">Time of Representation, twenty-five minutes.</p> - -<div class="figcenter" style="width: 700px;"> -<div class="caption"><p>Scene.</p></div> -<img src="images/illus_035.jpg" width="700" height="463" alt="" /> -</div> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_36" id="Page_36">[Pg 36]</a></span></p> - -<p class="center">ACT II. -</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<i>The drawing-room of</i> <span class="smcap">Mr. Mollentrave's</span> <i>house -in Cadogan Square. At back</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>door leads to -an inner room</i>. <span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> <i>is seated glancing -over proof-sheets. Suddenly he calls</i> "<span class="smcap">Mr. -Dexter</span>!" <span class="smcap">Dexter</span> <i>enters from the inner room -up</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>)</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>Is sitting</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>of</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>table</i>) I have a -few corrections to make for the new edition. -Have you your note-book?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter</span> (<i>enters</i> <span class="smcap">L. U. E.</span> <i>producing it</i>) Yes, -sir.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Sit down, sit down. (<span class="smcap">Dexter</span> <i>sits</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> -<i>of</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>table</i>) By the way, you've written that letter -for me to Lord Contareen?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> I have it in there for you to sign, sir, -with the others.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> What date did I fix for his—reappearance, -Dexter?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> (<i>turning up pages</i>) I can give you -the exact sentence, sir. (<i>reading</i>) "You have -sown the seed, my dear sir, expect its germination -in about six weeks. Then I shall invite you to -examine the shoots."</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Yes, that will do! that will do. -Couldn't be clearer. Now, Dexter, to return. I -don't quite like the sub-title of that new chapter -on Marriage, Dexter. Read it.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> "The Marriage-Course. The First -Lap."</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Exactly. It's too concrete. And -suggests other laps to follow.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> (<i>chuckling</i>) Yes, sir. Lapses.</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_37" id="Page_37">[Pg 37]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>glancing severely at him over his -spectacles</i>) Dexter, this is not the first time you -have offended in this fashion. I beg it may be -the last.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> (<i>contritely</i>) Sir—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Let me remind you that marriage -was not invented merely to give the comic man a -chance. Not a word, not a word—we need say no -more. (<i>Rise, crosses to bookshelves</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>taking out -book</i>) I want a new sub-title—something symbolic, -tasteful, and yet adapted to the gravity of -the situation.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> How would "stage" do, sir?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> It savours of the theatre. My work -has a large circulation among Nonconformists.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> "Phase," sir?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>across to</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>back of table</i>) Invariably -associated with the moon, or Napoleon. I -seek a word that shall happily suggest the first -disillusions of the young couple. Stay, I have it! -The "Marriage Links" we will call it—there you -have the symbol—and for sub-title:—(<i>down</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>) -"The First Bunker." (<span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> <i>rubs his -hands, delighted at his invention</i>)</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Martin</span> <i>the butler enters with</i> <span class="smcap">Lord Contareen</span>, -<i>a well-groomed, vacuous-looking man of forty</i>.) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> The First Bunk—(<i>sees</i> <span class="smcap">Contareen</span> -<i>reproachfully, crossing to up</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>front of table</i>) -Contareen! You here! That's wrong!</p> - -<p class="center">(<i>They shake hands</i>, <span class="smcap">Dexter</span> <i>rises</i>.) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> (<i>rising</i>) Shall I go now, sir?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Yes, Dexter. You understand that -I take you down with me to Swanage to-morrow?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> Yes, sir—certainly, good-day, sir.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Good-day to you.</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_38" id="Page_38">[Pg 38]</a></span></p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Dexter</span> <i>goes up</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> <i>turns to</i> <span class="smcap">Contareen</span>.) -</p> - -<p>(<i>Up</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) It's wrong, my dear fellow—it's -wrong! To-day's Friday—she refused you on -Wednesday. Too soon!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> (<i>eagerly</i>) Mollentrave—I—(<i>down</i> -<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>emphatically, down</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) I have -promised that you shall marry my daughter. I -have assured you that I have no doubt whatever -as to her affection. Then why this—precipitancy?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> She refused me very decidedly. -(<i>sits on settee</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> My poor Rosamund is a widow. (<i>up</i> -<span class="smcap">L. C.</span> <i>across</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>and down</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Also she has had -the advantage of correcting my proof-sheets. She -has read that passion wins maids, and perseverance -widows. She follows the rule. Do the -same!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> I thought—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Every siege must be conducted on -scientific principles. You should now be back in -your trenches. Digging, sir—digging!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> (<i>eagerly</i>) Look here, Lady Pentruddock -has asked me down to her place in -Shropshire.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Well?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> Her sister will be there—Muriel, -I mean, not Gladys. Muriel has charm.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Granted. And then?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> Your daughter knows Lady Muriel. -When she learns that I shall be under the -same roof with that fascinating person—eh?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>to</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>of table</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) I see, I see. -Well—(<i>he ponders</i>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> If I tell Lady Claude that I—er—accept -her decision cheerfully—eh?—and inform -her that I—Lady Muriel—don't you think?</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_39" id="Page_39">[Pg 39]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>judicially</i>) The idea has merit.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> (<i>humbly</i>) I got it out of the -book.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Of course. That goes without saying. -(<i>sit</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>of table</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) Well, no harm can be -done. Though a line to me, from Pentruddock -Castle would have been better.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> Perhaps. But still—I say, you're -backing me up?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> I'm supporting you admirably. I -have repeatedly expressed my delight at her -having refused you.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> (<i>staggered</i>) I say!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> I dwell with satisfaction on the -prospect of not seeing you again—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> Look here!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> And have more than once hinted at -a past that is probably strewn with forlorn Nancies -and Janes—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> (<i>aghast—rise</i>) By Jove!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> "To kindle the flame of love in the -feminine bosom"—I quote from the fifteenth -chapter—(<i>he presses the bell</i>) "the third party -should vehemently, and persistently, denounce -the person whom he desires to see enthroned."</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> But still!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Leave it to me, my dear fellow, leave -it to me! I tell you it works like a charm!</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Cont.</span> <i>re-sits settee</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>)</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Martin</span> <i>comes in</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Inform Lady Claude that Lord Contareen -is here, and ask her to be good enough to -descend.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Martin.</span> Yes, sir. (<i>he goes</i>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Now see—when Rosamund comes, I -shall retire into the back room there, and write a<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_40" id="Page_40">[Pg 40]</a></span> -letter. I shall give you three minutes. Then you -take your leave.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> Quite so. Three minutes will do!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> And remember—be sprightly! Not -a trace of acidity! Persiflage is good—in moderation—<i>Bring</i> -in Lady Pentruddock's sister—but -don't <i>drag</i> her in! You understand?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> Perfectly, perfectly. Oh yes, I -see. Gad, Mollentrave, I've always done what -you told me. But those Nancies and Janes, you -know—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Tut, tut, women like a dash of -colour! Now mind—your visit to-day is merely -a p. p. c. card—the whistle that heralds the shunting -of the train—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> Quite so. (<i>whistle</i>) I must remember -that.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>rise, cross to</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Your line is delicacy. -You feel it only due to her, and so forth. -Your tone must be soft, mellifluous—a south wind -rustling over orange trees. Orange trees, mark -you—<i>not</i> cypresses!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> (<i>rise</i>) Exactly. Orange trees—<i>not -cypresses</i>. I see.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>takes</i> <span class="smcap">Cont.</span> <i>across</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) Take no -notice of her confusion. Be bland, respectful. -Retire gracefully. (<span class="smcap">Cont.</span> <i>crosses to</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>front of</i> -<span class="smcap">Mollen.</span>) A gentle pressure of the hand. No -more.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Cont.</span> (<span class="smcap">L.</span>) I'll do it. I'll do it! You're -wonderful, Mollentrave, but I say—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) H'sh! (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span> <i>to top of -table</i>)</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Lady Claude</span> <i>enters</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>with book</i>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>down</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) How are you, Lord Contareen?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> (<i>down</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>—<i>suddenly smitten with<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_41" id="Page_41">[Pg 41]</a></span> -confusion</i>) I'm very well, thank you, Lady -Claude—never was better, never was better!</p> - -<p class="center">(<i>He looks to</i> <span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> <i>away</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>a step</i>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>top of table—to</i> <span class="smcap">Lady Claude</span>) -My dear, you will excuse me—I have a line to -write to—to—oh yes, to Balsted, of course, about -the train to-morrow. We take the 11.20—he may -as well join us. Your pardon, Contareen—I shall -not be a moment.</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> <i>puts book away</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>)</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> <i>goes into the inner room</i> <span class="smcap">L. U. E.</span> -<i>rubbing his hands</i>.) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> (<i>disconcerted</i>) Balsted! the lawyer -fellow!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>smiling</i>) The great barrister—yes. -He is coming to Swanage.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> The deuce he is! Old friend of -yours, isn't he?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>sit</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>of</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>table, sitting</i>) I have -known him a number of years.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> Confound it, ain't he a bachelor? -(<i>To</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>of table</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>from</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> He was when I last saw him.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> And how long ago was that?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> I should think an hour and a half.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> (<i>very perturbed</i>) (<i>sit</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>of</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> -<i>table</i>) Eh? Quite so, quite so. No concern of -mine, of course, and all that. Well, what I had to -say—the fact is that I—confound Balsted—he's -put me off!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>wondering</i>) Put you off? Off what, -Lord Contareen?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> You see, I didn't know you were -going to have visitors at Swanage.</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_42" id="Page_42">[Pg 42]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>smiling</i>) Well, that's not unnatural, -is it? We've such a large place there!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> (<i>eagerly</i>) I suppose you wouldn't -like me to—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> After what has occurred, perhaps—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> (<i>pleading</i>) I've only asked you -once, you know—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>emphatically</i>) But I do most earnestly -beg you to believe that my decision is final, -and irrevocable.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> (<i>humbly, rise</i>) I don't think I -made it quite clear to you to what extent I ad—</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> <i>coughs loudly from the inner -room</i>.) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> (<i>quickly</i>) To what extent I ad—ad—advocate! -Funny, isn't it! (<i>up stage</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>a -step</i>) Besides, we're too old, and that sort of -thing—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>puzzled</i>) I beg your pardon—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> (<i>top of table</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) Oh, nothing, nothing—a -joke that's all—mere persiflage! What I -wanted to say was—to break it—h'm delicately—that -I was going away too—to Lady Pentruddock's, -you know—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Indeed? I hope you will have a most -pleasant time.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> Thanks—sure to, sure to! Seems -that her sister's there—Muriel, you know, not -Gladys. Fine woman, Muriel.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>indifferently</i>) Very.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> (<i>artfully</i>) Old friend of mine—and -I fancy that she—she—you see—well, I—and -I rather want to—eh, don't you think?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>clapping her hands</i>) Admirable! -Oh, I'm so glad!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> (<i>quickly</i>) Nothing done yet, of -course! There still is time—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Time?</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_43" id="Page_43">[Pg 43]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> My visit to-day is merely a kind -of—whistle, you know. 'Bout ship, eh? You -don't mind?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Mind? I! My dear Lord Contareen, -I assure you—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> You've no objection, I mean, to -my going down there?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Far from it! Indeed, I should most -strongly recommend a change of scene. (<i>rise and -away</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> (<i>cunningly, down</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>to</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) And -of actors, Lady Claude, eh, of actors? Ha, ha! -I'm anxious of course, that you shouldn't think -me—(<i>he pauses</i>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>Impatiently, sit on sofa</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>) Think -you what, Lord Contareen?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> Not regard it as sudden, eh? Too -abrupt and that sort of thing?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> On the contrary, I shall be delighted!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>disconcerted</i>) Oh! delighted!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> I assure you! I have the greatest respect -for Lady Gladys—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> Muriel, Muriel—not Gladys—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Your pardon—I should have said -Lady Muriel. Let me declare to you, most earnestly -and sincerely, that you have my very best -wishes for your success.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> Of course I've said nothing yet—but -once down there—weak man, charming -woman—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Let us know as soon as it's settled! -And I will congratulate you, with my whole -heart! Believe it, Lord Contareen!</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> <i>comes in</i>, <span class="smcap">L. U. E.</span> <i>and goes to top -of table</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>with a discreet preliminary cough</i>.) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> (<i>Looks round to</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>) Just going,<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_44" id="Page_44">[Pg 44]</a></span> -Mollentrave—just going, Lady Claude—au revoir!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Good-bye. And my love to Lady -Muriel!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Contareen.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Quite so, quite so. -Good-bye, Mollentrave. I'm afraid I've made an -awful hash—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>on his</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>) Good-bye, my -dear fellow—good-bye. (<i>in his ear</i>) She's piqued—she's -piqued! Spade-work—nothing like it! -(<i>aloud</i>) Good-bye!</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Contareen</span> <i>goes</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> <i>returns to the -centre of the room, rubbing his hands</i>.) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>very earnestly</i>) Papa, don't practise -on me!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>blandly</i>) My child?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> There are so many specimens for you -to play with! Look on me as an exception—a -freak, if you like. But <i>I</i>, at least, am not a rule -of three sum!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>sitting on stool</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>patting her hand</i>) -My dear Rosamund!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>rise</i>) How <i>could</i> you imagine that -such an inane, idiotic creature as that—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> It is certainly strange that he should -go to Pentruddock. Your resentment is justified.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>and across back of table to -down</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span> <i>scornfully</i>) Resentment!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> I shouldn't be in the least surprised -if Lady Muriel secured him!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Oh, she may have him, with all my -heart, and all my sympathy too!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>slyly</i>) Of course, my dear, I'm -aware that <i>you</i> don't care for him. How could -you?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>down</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>smiling in spite of herself</i>) -You refuse to believe me? I cannot convince -you?</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_45" id="Page_45">[Pg 45]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>stroking her condescendingly</i>) My -dear—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) After all that has happened! -After what you have seen of my life! And you -really believe that I ever could care for this man! -That I, a creature with a heart and soul, am -pigeon-holed in your book, and bound to conform -to its maxims!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>fatuously</i>) On the contrary—I—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>up and down</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) Is it his title -appeals to you—his houses, his money? Years -ago, I was obedient—my husband, too, had a title—and -you know how dearly I paid for it.... -Weave no webs round me! The fly has grown -wary—and it has had the advantage, too, of studying -the wiles of the spider!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> I quite admit, my dear, that Contareen's -change of attitude is reprehensible—very. -And I have not the least doubt—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>smiling sorrowfully</i>) You are incorrigible!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> My dear child! Since I tell you—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Ah—I see that I shall have to provide -you—with material for a new chapter!</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<i>She kisses him—he purrs complacently. The -door opens and</i> <span class="smcap">Martin</span> <i>ushers in</i> <span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span>, -<i>who is wildly excited</i>.)</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Martin.</span> Sir Joseph Balsted.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>eagerly</i>) Balsted! (<i>rise and across -to</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Mollentrave,—awful—the little -idiot imagined you were proposing for me!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>sitting</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>) No! No!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> She thought you meant <i>me</i>!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Balsted, how could you! Why, when -I left the room she had accepted Everard!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> And I sent the boy to her—he comes<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_46" id="Page_46">[Pg 46]</a></span> -back, pale as a ghost—and says she's engaged—to -ME! (<i>sit</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>of</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>table</i>)</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Lady Claude</span> <i>up</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>and down</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>convulsed with</i> -<i>laughter. Both men turn to her.</i>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>reproachfully</i>) My dear Rosamund, -your hilarity is misplaced.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>contritely but still choking, sit</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>by -work table</i>) I'm very sorry—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Our friend has unfortunately entangled -himself in a most serious dilemma—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I! That's good! <i>You</i> did the proposing!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> You heard me—you even complimented -me!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>rise</i>) It flashed across me at the time—you -never mentioned his name!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>with an indulgent smile</i>) Not mention -his name! I!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> If she had accepted Everard, would she, -one moment after, have consented to marry me?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Do not excite yourself, my dear Balsted! -What happened, I see it, was this. I dug -the hole, and gave you the tree to put in. You -popped in the wrong one!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> What happened, Sir Joseph, after you -heard the news?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>to</i> <span class="smcap">Lady C.</span>) I rushed on here at once. -(<i>to</i> <span class="smcap">Mollen.</span>) You've got me into this scrape—get -me out!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> My dear friend, my services are of -course at your disposal. But, truly, how could -you? The affair was so simple!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Well, one thing's certain at any rate—she's -not in love with Everard—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>shaking his head</i>) That's not certain -at all!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>impatiently</i>) What! When the little -fool's in love with me!</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_47" id="Page_47">[Pg 47]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> That's not proved.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Not proved! When she wants to marry -me!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Didn't I tell you she was an invertebrate -sentimentalist? You forgot that. Had -you left her undisturbed in the belief that you -meant Everard, she'd have gone to the altar with -Everard. You persuaded her I had spoken for -you—she switched her love on to you. That's the -case in a nutshell.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Preposterous!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> There you may trust my, let us say, -wider experience. But tell me, Everard! He did -not undeceive her?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> No—heroics! She loves you, he says -to me—uncle, she loves you! He seemed to take -it for granted I <i>must</i> love her! And he hoped—we'd -be happy! You'll go now—at once?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> I'm willing of course. Only let us -first, calmly, review the situation.</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> <i>sits</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>of</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>table</i>.) -</p> - -<p>Assume that I tell your ward bluntly of her mistake—well, -what's the result?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> That I'm free!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Yes! But at what cost!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Cost! What do you mean?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> The situation of which you complained -this afternoon will remain, will it not? -And intensified—a million times. Nay, it will -have become—impossible!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> All this is beyond me! he turns appealingly -to Lady Claude! Lady Claude!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> It is beyond me too, Sir Joseph—but -papa knows—he is infallible!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> The girl has confessed her love for -you. A love, mark you, that does not exist, but -that <i>my</i> explanation will call into being!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>pettishly</i>) Absurd!</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_48" id="Page_48">[Pg 48]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> But it's true! Her feeling for you, -at present a mere wayward infatuation, will at -once swell into romantic passion. She'll begin to -wither—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Wither?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Fade on the stalk! Refuse her food—live -on poetry and tea! Be a martyr! Then -anæmia acts in. Doctors, nurses, cures—and all -the time, mind you, she's hugging an imaginary -grief!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>Impatiently</i>) But, why, in the name -of Heaven—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Heaven only knows. <i>I</i> didn't make -women—I have merely observed them. If you -don't believe me, ask Rosamund.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>demurely</i>) Sir Joseph knows, I -always agree with Papa.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>rise and up</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) And, mark you, -more, when I tell her you meant the nephew, she -at once proceeds to hate the nephew.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>feebly</i>) Hate him!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Inevitably.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Lady Claude!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Papa means that her vanity will be -piqued.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Vanity!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Complacently the essential ingredient -of a young woman's affections.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> The book says she will demand an -eternity to pass.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> A feminine figure of speech that resolves -itself into months! But think of those -months with her sighing, dying, crying! (<i>down</i> -<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>groaning</i>) What a catastrophe!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>of</i> <span class="smcap">Sir J.</span>) You're sure—quite -sure—you won't marry her?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>angrily</i>) Mollentrave! (<i>rising</i>) If -<i>this</i> is all the help you can give me—</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_49" id="Page_49">[Pg 49]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>forcing him back in his chair</i>) Alternatives! -I merely suggest alternatives! You -don't marry—that's settled, agreed. But I see -no reason why you should not be—engaged!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>rising</i>, <span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> <i>sits him again</i>) Engaged! -You're mad!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>round back of</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>table</i>) Secret engagement! -You tell her—paternal again—you -give her a month to reflect. Secrecy all round—except -us. You bound—she free.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> How does that help me?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Follow me closely. (<i>to</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>of table</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) -During that month you become—senile.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Senile! Why, hang it, I'm only forty-five!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> And she's nineteen! Strip off your -limelight—to her you're Methuselah! (<i>sitting</i> -<span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>of</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>table</i>.)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>protesting</i>) I—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>breaking in impetuously</i>) My dear -friend, you don't really imagine that she loves -<i>you</i>? Whatever's real in her loves Everard—or -any other good-looking young fellow of his age -whom she chances to meet. What she admires in -you is your talent, your position, your power. -Very well, take them off!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>blankly</i>) How can I?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> I've told you—be senile. Fidgety, -crotchety—sensitive to draughts—dyspeptic—adore -your food. Flannel nightcap—false teeth—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>indignantly rising</i>) I haven't!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> <i>Imagine</i> you have.</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> <i>re-sits</i>.) -</p> - -<p>Speak of them often! Boil your milk! Retire at -nine, have your paper warmed. Tell her you mean -to resign the House, give up the Bar, live in the -country, ten miles from a station, and write a -book on Constitutional Law!</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_50" id="Page_50">[Pg 50]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> All that, eh?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> And dictate to her five hours a day! -Find fault with her spelling—be always finding -fault!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Lively for both of us! But look here—seeing -that she has lived with me for a year, and -I <i>haven't</i> been senile—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>with a petulant gesture</i>) Tut, tut, -tut! Hitherto, you've concealed your—little ailments! -But, now that you've won her, are sure -of her, you show yourself—as you are! (<i>rise</i>) Oh, -it's simple enough! And so much for frontal attack. -(<i>a step</i>) As for skirmishes, we'll ask -Rosamund to be good enough to flirt with the -nephew—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>turning to her</i>) To flirt—you?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>merrily</i>) The poor boy will need -consolation. And if I can be of service—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>up to</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>of table</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>with a flourish</i>) -Within two days she has the boy at her feet! -Then your bride becomes jealous. Your tyranny -offends her—she begins to see you are old. Romance -drops off like paper from a damp wall. -Everard's coolness piqued her—she proceeds to -discover that she loves Everard. You in dressing -gown and slippers—he young Greek god. And, -after a month's steady digging—we arrive—at—the -real girl!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> A month....</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> May be less, may be less! Finally, -explanation—you discover her in tears—you -play the noble Roman, release her unconditionally, -Rosamund sends Everard to her—you join -their hands. Slow music. Curtain. See?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>rise and down</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>) I don't like the idea -of an engagement, even though it be secret. But -look here—if I did this—how about Everard? -What should I say to him?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>to bottom of</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>table</i>) Let him be<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_51" id="Page_51">[Pg 51]</a></span>lieve—as -he already believes—that you admire -what's-her-name—but mention the month's probation. -Hint darkly at possibility of happy ending. -(<i>to</i> <span class="smcap">R. C. L.</span> <i>of</i> <span class="smcap">Sir J.</span>) Bring Everard down -to Swanage—I answer for the rest!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>hesitating</i>) It sounds plausible—though -it's a fearful undertaking! But, before -deciding, I should like a word with Lady Claude. -Will you allow me?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Certainly, certainly. I'll smoke a -cigarette down-stairs—my habit, before dressing. -(<i>cross up</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>) You'll find habits useful by the way—I've -one or two that I'll tell you. I'll see you -before you go!</p> - -<p class="center">(<i>He retires cheerfully humming a tune</i>, <span class="smcap">R.</span>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>to</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) Lady Claude, I've asked for -this because—I scarcely know where I am, or -what I'm saying! Your father rattles on—he -seems convincing—he may be right—but my instinct -tells me that, in this fearful muddle, <i>you</i> -are the surer guide!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> I?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir. J.</span> You! If I spoke rather cynically this -afternoon—if I have grown to think rather hardly -of women—remember that there was one whom -I—loved—and she—wouldn't have me!</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Lady Claude</span> <i>makes a gesture</i>.) -</p> - -<p>Oh, don't be alarmed—I won't drag up the past. -No doubt, then, I was merely a wild, impetuous -youngster, like my poor Everard to-day. But—I -have not forgotten—how deeply I—felt it.... -And here I seem, through my carelessness, to have -created sorrow for two young lives.... I'm a selfish -man, of course—I've shown it plainly enough!—but -still I've tried—honestly tried—to do my<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_52" id="Page_52">[Pg 52]</a></span> -duty—by both of them.... Now I am urged to -play an odious comedy—for it <i>is</i> odious, is it not?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Deception can never be pleasant.... -You have all my sympathy.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I need it, I need it! Women, after all, -are an unknown quantity to me. Your father has -compiled a series of tables, has dissected and analysed—he -may be right, I don't know—but I -want <i>you</i> to guide me! You, and you only!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>gently</i>) What can I tell you? -(<i>rise and cross</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>and sitting on stool</i>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) In the first place, this. Is it -not rather my duty promptly to undeceive the -girl, at any cost? Have I the right to—play with -her affections?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>hesitating</i>) Sir Joseph—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Remember, I loved her father. He entrusted -his daughter to me, his old friend.... To-day, -when I think of him!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> You want my honest opinion?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I do.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Then what I have to say is said in a -very few words. One should not trifle with the -heart of a girl!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> What am I to do?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> It is you, and you only, who can decide.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Tell me what you think!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> The poor child has probably long -adored you in secret. She will have read sentiment -into your very least words—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>with sudden recollection</i>) Ha! the -flowers on my table, day after day!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Laid there by her each morning, -fondly, tenderly—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Advise me! I will follow you, blindly!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Do what is kindest!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> If I undeceive her—the picture your -father has drawn—and your father understands -women—</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_53" id="Page_53">[Pg 53]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> What he says may be true of ninety-nine -out of a hundred—there is always the hundredth.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> The hundredth—yes—I don't know—I -know her so little! The disillusioning process -<i>might</i> be effective?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> It might. One cannot tell.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>eagerly</i>) Then shall I do it? Shall -I?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> You must know best.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>with deep feeling</i>) Rosamund, I am -appealing to you—for your help!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>very earnestly, rise</i>) Then, no! I -would do the honest, the straightforward thing!... -Go to her yourself, tell her—of the mistake—but -oh, so softly, so gently, (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) that her poor little -heart shall rest itself upon yours, and not feel—too -ashamed! Point out how unwise it would -be! Be so full of pity that the wound ... shall -be scarcely a bruise.... Be so tender, so human, -that her poor little tears shall freshen her heart, -and not scald it.... And let there be tears in your -heart too—and no trace of—laughter.... There! -That is my advice. But I may be wrong....</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> No, you are right—I feel it! I go at -once. (<i>round back of table to up</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) You will -tell your father. (<i>coming down</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>to</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>of</i> <span class="smcap">Lady -C.</span>) And, my dear friend, my very dear friend, I—thank -you!</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<i>He takes her hand, which she allows for a moment -to rest in his. Suddenly</i> <span class="smcap">Mollentrave's</span> -<i>voice is heard outside</i>. <span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span> <i>falls back</i>. -<i>The door opens and</i> <span class="smcap">Mollentrave enters</span>, <i>perking -and smiling, followed by</i> <span class="smcap">Margaret</span>.)</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>away</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>aghast</i>) Margaret!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>very volubly</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) My dear fellow, -Miss Messilent has had the charming idea to come<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_54" id="Page_54">[Pg 54]</a></span> -here and fetch you. Miss Messilent, let me introduce -you to my daughter, Lady Claude Derenham. -An admirer of your fiancé—like us all!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>blankly</i>) Oh!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Marg.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>shyly</i>) Peters told me where you -had gone—I thought—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>beaming</i>) Sweet of you! -Balsted, I've told the young lady how immensely -pleased we all are! And how lucky we think you, -at your time of life, to have secured so lovely a -bride!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>clearing his throat</i>) I—er—I—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> My dear Balsted, I am sure I am not -speaking my opinion alone when I say that never -did—November—find so delicious a May! When -is the wedding to be?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>away</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>savagely, beneath his breath</i>) -Wedding, wedding—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Marg.</span> (<i>sitting on stool</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> <i>sits</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>of</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> -<i>table—coyly</i>) He made me promise it would be -soon—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>chuckling</i>) Ah, he did, did he? At -our age, you see, a man's in a hurry—eh, Balsted? -Well, you're all coming with us to Swanage -to-morrow—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Marg.</span> (<i>surprised</i>) Swanage?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Yes—we've arranged with Sir Joseph. -He didn't tell you? Very remiss, of course—very -remiss. He's a trifle dictatorial, I'm afraid—but -you mustn't mind that—you mustn't mind -that!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>trying in vain to get hold of</i> <span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span>) -Mollentrave, I want—</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> <i>goes up</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>to</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>of</i> <span class="smcap">Lady C.</span>, <i>who rises</i>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>to</i> <span class="smcap">Margaret</span>) When you marry a -distinguished—and <i>elderly</i> man, my dear, you -must of course put up with a few little draw<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_55" id="Page_55">[Pg 55]</a></span>backs. -May must be content with November's—ivy! -Eh?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Marg.</span> (<i>rising and away</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>to sofa and sitting</i>) -Oh, but he's not so very elderly—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>following her to</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>) Oh no, I married -a much older last week! I'll show you -his photograph. (<i>shows photograph</i>)</p> - -<p class="center">(<i>He draws close to</i> <span class="smcap">Margaret</span> <i>and whispers merrily -to her</i>, <span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span> <i>goes to</i> <span class="smcap">Lady Claude</span>.) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">L.</span>) He has done it! I can't retreat -now! It's impossible!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) No—I'm afraid.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>Both go up</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) (<i>wildly</i>) Oh, that -father of yours! Well, there it is—we must start—disillusioning! -Senile!—ha! and the rest! -There's nothing else for it! You'll help me?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Of course I'll do what I can!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Marg.</span> (<i>rising</i>) Joseph!</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> <i>crosses to</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Marg.</span> (<i>Up</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>holding</i> <span class="smcap">Sir J.'s</span> <i>arm, he is on -her</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>She turns to</i> <span class="smcap">Lady Claude</span>) Good-bye, -Lady Claude, I need (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) scarcely say my -husband's friends will be mine.</p> - -<p>(<span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> <i>goes up</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>to open double doors</i>.)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>groaning</i>) Husband!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Marg.</span> Good-bye, Mr. Mollentrave—(<i>sweetly</i>) -Come, Joseph!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Oh!!!</p> - -<p class="center">(<i>They</i> <span class="smcap">Exit R.</span>) -</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<i>She passes her arm beamingly through his and -walks him off.</i> <span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> <i>turns smiling to</i> -<span class="smcap">Lady Claude</span> <i>and rubs his hands</i>.)</p></div> - -<p class="center">CURTAIN.<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_56" id="Page_56">[Pg 56]</a></span></p> -<div class="chapter"></div> -<hr class="chap" /> - - - - -<h2><a name="ACT_III" id="ACT_III">ACT III.</a></h2> - - -<p class="center">Time of Representation, thirty-five minutes.</p> - -<div class="figcenter" style="width: 700px;"> -<img src="images/illus_056.jpg" width="700" height="515" alt="" /> -<div class="caption"><p>PROPERTIES USED.</p> - -<ul><li>Neck wrap.</li> -<li>Basket (containing) sweets, jelly and scarf.</li> -<li><i>Times</i> paper.</li> -<li>Telegram and telegram form.</li> -</ul></div> -</div> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_57" id="Page_57">[Pg 57]</a></span></p> - -<p class="center">ACT III. -</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p><i>The garden of</i> <span class="smcap">Mr. Mollentrave's</span> <i>house in Swanage. -A low fence runs at back, with a thick -hedge; behind is the sea, to which a winding -path leads, down the rock. There are alleys -running to right and left.</i> <span class="smcap">Miss Treable</span> <i>is -seated on the tree</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span> <i>with</i> <span class="smcap">Dexter</span> <i>standing -before her. A week has elapsed since the last -Act.</i></p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) Yes, Miss Treable, he is a great -man—a very great man! His powers of insight -are most extraordinary! I trust you do not -resent his—as it were—stripping off the pigment -and exposing the unvarnished canvas?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> (<i>is sitting</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>tree trunk, haughtily</i>) -I have no doubt that what Mr. Mollentrave says -may be true of <i>some</i> women—but certainly not of -<span class="smcap">ME</span>!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> (<i>bowing</i>) You are naturally an exception. -His remarks must be taken as applying -generally to the sex. (<i>down</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> Regarded from <i>that</i> point of view—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) Ah, Miss Treable, in my own -humble life I have derived the greatest benefit -from Mr. Mollentrave's teaching! And like all -geniuses—he is so modest! One of his most brilliant -aphorisms was—I say it with pride—inspired -by me.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> (<i>indifferent</i>) Indeed?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>resting on</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>tree trunk</i>) I -assure you. You must know that my wife has a -large circle of relations. I will confess to you<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_58" id="Page_58">[Pg 58]</a></span> -that I somewhat resented their constant interference -in our affairs. I mentioned the matter to -Mr. Mollentrave. Without a moment's hesitation -that remarkable man dictated the line: "Marital -happiness begins when the wife's relations—leave -off!"</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> (<i>sarcastic</i>) Profound. Very.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> (<i>sit on</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>trunk</i>) He has permitted -me to compile a little volume of extracts, "The -Mollentrave Birthday Book"—one coruscation -for every day of the year. A good idea, is it not? -(<i>rising</i>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> (<i>rising</i>) Admirable! But I doubt -whether many women will buy the book. (<i>down</i> -<span class="smcap">R.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> (<i>moving off</i>) If all those who consider -themselves exceptions purchase it, Miss -Treable, I shall be perfectly satisfied. (<i>goes up</i> -<span class="smcap">C.</span>)</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<i>He goes through the gate.</i> <span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span> <i>comes -stealthily along looking worried and haggard</i> -<span class="smcap">R. 3 E.</span>)</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>brightly</i>) Good morning, Sir -Joseph.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) Good morning. I had hoped to -find Mr. Mollentrave here. Do you happen to -know—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Miss Tre.</span> Would you wish me to tell him?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I should be much obliged.</p> - -<p class="center">(<i>Miss Treable exits</i> <span class="smcap">R. 3 E.</span>) -</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span> <i>throws himself on the grass</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>and -plucks savagely at it, muttering to himself. -After a moment</i> <span class="smcap">Margaret</span> <i>comes running from -the house</i> <span class="smcap">R. 3 E.</span>, <i>looks round, and gives a glad -cry as she sees</i> <span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> <i>The cry becomes re<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_59" id="Page_59">[Pg 59]</a></span>proachful -when she finds he is lying on the -grass. She carries a small basket in her hand.</i>)</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Marg.</span> Oh, Joseph, dear Joseph, how could -you! Lying on the grass! (<i>puts basket down</i> <span class="smcap">R. -C.</span> <i>and helps</i> <span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> <i>to rise</i>.)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">L.</span>) (<i>getting up. Miserably</i>) H'm -I—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Marg.</span> (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) Wicked man! With your rheumatism! -And no muffler! I found it in the hall! -Oh, naughty, naughty! (<i>she produces it from the -basket</i>) Here it is, sir! Put it on at once! -(<i>puts muffler round him</i>) (<i>taking him to</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) -(<i>he sits</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>trunk of tree</i>) And it's twelve o'clock! -I've brought your essence—here—and a spoon. -(<i>she produces them from the basket and feeds -him</i>) What would you do without me?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Impossible to conceive!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Marg.</span> (<span class="smcap">she sits on his L.</span>) Take it, sir! (<i>he -laps it up piteously</i>) To think of you all these -years, having to look after yourself, and hide, because -he wouldn't let his little girl see how ill he -was! Oh, poor, poor! (<i>she feeds him a second -time and wipes his mouth with the muffler</i>) But -she'll take care of him now! Only wasn't it -wicked of you to slip off like that? You had only -dictated for an hour and a half!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I thought you were tired!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Marg.</span> (<i>with enthusiasm</i>) Tired! I could go -on forever! It's immensely interesting—fascinating. -Oh, how wonderful you are!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>clearing his throat</i>) H'm—I—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Marg.</span> Constitutional Law, one would think -would be a dry subject. To me it's a fairy tale.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Er—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Marg.</span> Perhaps because <i>you</i> are speaking! -You! Nouns and adjectives cease to be parts of -speech—they become parts of—you!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>with a great effort</i>) I have frequently<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_60" id="Page_60">[Pg 60]</a></span> -had occasion to remark to you, Margaret, that I -have a great distaste for sentimentality. I have -explained to you—the month of probation—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Marg.</span> One week has expired. Has it been a -week? Can the days have flown so quickly?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> They have evidently contrived to. Although—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Marg.</span> (<i>rise, up</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) See how the sun is shining—how -radiant the water is—and the sky! The -dancing sunlight! Oh, what does it say to you, -the sunlight! (<i>down</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>to</i> <span class="smcap">Sir J.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>impatiently</i>) It says to me that it's -very hot—and that we're talking nonsense.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Marg.</span> Oh, let us, for once! I've been so good!—Joseph, -you coughed! You must take a lozenge. -(<i>she produces a box from the basket</i>) You must! -Mr. Mollentrave says that you have the beginnings -of asthma.</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<i>She opens the box, takes out a lozenge, and -forces it between his lips. He swallows it, -pathetically.</i>)</p></div> - -<p>Miss Treable and I are practising first aid, in -case you should fall down—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>savagely</i>) And why in the name of -goodness should I fall down?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Marg.</span> Mr. Mollentrave told me that your limbs -are rather unsteady—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>clenching his fists</i>) Ah, Mollentrave, -Mollentrave!!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Marg.</span> (<i>kneeling on his</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>She puts his arm -on her shoulders, fondly</i>) But have no fear, dear -one! You shall lean on me—I shall be your -crutch, your support! Oh, the thought of us two -in our cottage—just you and I! I dream of it!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>growling, taking arm away</i>) No -dances—no theatres—not even a visitor—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Marg.</span> Shall I want any of these—when I have<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_61" id="Page_61">[Pg 61]</a></span>—you! -You, who have given up all—for my sake—for -me!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>fidgeting</i>) H'm—but still—I fancy -you'll find it dull—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> I? Never! You don't know me -yet—not altogether, I mean. Oh, if you would let -me speak to you—about myself—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>rise and cross</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>, <i>throwing lozenge -away—fretfully</i>) That theme is barred—by consent. -Don't you think you had better go back to -the house? Unless you would like to bathe?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>rise, firmly</i>) No—you do not -bathe—I shall not either. No pleasure in which -<i>you</i> cannot join, can henceforth be a pleasure to -me!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>turning up stage—groaning</i>) Come—we'll -go back to Law! (<i>he rises</i>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> Yes, yes—let us! But stay—I have -a word to say to you—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> More words?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> Not of myself this time—nor of you—but -of—Everard!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>with a gleam of hope</i>) Everard!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>reproachfully</i>) Oh, Joseph, my -own Joseph, what a suspicion! Could you imagine! -Oh!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>groaning again</i>) He is more of your -age—I thought—I told you I should not blame -you—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> Never dare to hint at such a thing -again! I regard him—it is my duty to regard -him—with the serene, but affectionate eyes, of an—aunt, -(<i>sit</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) Aunt!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> And—I confess—it grieves me—to -see him—so much taken up with—Lady Claude.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>eagerly</i>) Ah, you have noticed—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> Day after day he is with her—with -her all the time. She—ah, Joseph, you may<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_62" id="Page_62">[Pg 62]</a></span> -not have observed it—but women have quick eyes! -Lady Claude was a friend of yours once, I know—but -she is a designing woman!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>angrily</i>) I say! Look here!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> Oh, I mean nothing unkind. Women -of that age—she is <i>at least</i> thirty-five—naturally -crave to be—admired. And it is perfectly -plain to me that she—is drawing Everard on.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>grimly</i>) Really!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> She flirts with him outrageously! -She won't let him out of her sight! I've been -looking forward to finding him a wife—you and -I together—some girl who would make him happy.... -But Lady Claude!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>cunningly</i>) Everard certainly seems -to admire her—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> Is it not incomprehensible! She's -so old.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> H'm, if it's the disproportion of age -that shocks you, think of us! I—fifty—and you -nineteen!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>rise, and up to him</i>) My love -shall twine round you so softly that we shall -divide my youth—shall share it. And, in the -days to come, we shall ask—which one is old—Joseph—or -Margaret?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>sulkily</i>) Conundrums of that kind -will be useful, on winter evenings, with the wind -howling down the chimney, and the rain coming -through the roof—(<i>turn away</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>getting on</i> <span class="smcap">Sir J.'s</span> <span class="smcap">L.</span>) There can -be no wind when you are near me, and no rain -can come through the roof of our love!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>throwing up his hands in despair</i>) -Oh, no more at present, please!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>laying a hand on his arm</i>) You'll -speak to Everard?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Why on earth should I?</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_63" id="Page_63">[Pg 63]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> Joseph! Shall we let the poor boy -throw himself away on—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>laughing hysterically</i>) Ha, ha! -Oh, that's very good! Throw himself away on—Lady -Claude!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) (<i>offended</i>) You think it's -impossible? But I tell you I've seen—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> My child, we've talked nonsense enough -for one morning. Let's go. (<i>takes her hand and -is about to lead her away</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> -<i>comes in breezily up</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) Ah, there's Mollentrave. -I must have a word with him. Run on to -the house—I'll follow. (<i>giving her the basket</i>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>fondly</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>) Come soon, dear one—come -soon. When my eyes do not rest on you -they grow tired with waiting!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Please go, there's a good girl!</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<span class="smcap">Margaret</span> <i>departs regretfully</i> <span class="smcap">R. 3 E.</span> <span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> -<i>has been coming from the other side. He -wears his usual air of supreme satisfaction</i>)</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) You want me, Balsted? -All going well?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>savagely</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>takes muffler off</i>) Oh, -wonderfully well. The way we're progressing is -extraordinary—very!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>his head on one side</i>) The trained -observer would almost detect a suspicion of—satire.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Satire! Heaven forbid! It's true that -the girl grows fonder and fonder—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> She has only tasted the jam so far—but -the powder's working!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> She Josephs me from morning till -night! She'll be calling me Joey soon. (<i>down</i> -<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) No, no, Balsted! I should <i>not</i> -encourage her in the use of the diminutive!</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_64" id="Page_64">[Pg 64]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>savagely</i>) Gurrh! Look here, Mollentrave—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Impatient person! I said a month, -did I not? So far but a week has passed—(<span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> -<i>sits</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>sit</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Another week will drive me -crazy. I dictate law to her—the dullest stuff I -can find—I tell you she likes it, she never wants -me to stop!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> You will forgive me, my dear Balsted—but -have we been quite—senile—enough?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Senile! Have I been senile? Haven't -I simulated aches and pains, and congenital insanity, -till I simply detest myself? Man, she -loves me the more for it!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>airily</i>) Merely the first stage, Balsted! -Peeling!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I can't go on—I tell you I can't! The -fact is, Mollentrave, that you've been hopelessly -wrong.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>emphatically</i>) Events are following -exactly the path that I had marked out; they -are, with unerring precision, pursuing to a hairs-breadth -the line I had indicated in my mind.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>sarcastic</i>) Indeed! Then perhaps -you'll explain—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> My dear Balsted, believe that I make -not the slightest reflection upon your intelligence -when I remark that a general's plans are rarely -comprehensible to his subalterns.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>pettishly</i>) This is not a case—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>rise and go</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) Pardon me, but it -is. If I may borrow an analogy from your legal -jargon, I am the leader here, and you the junior. -Is that not so?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I have made up my mind. I shall tell -her the truth.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Do—and they'll drag up her body on -Swanage beach to-morrow.</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_65" id="Page_65">[Pg 65]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Absurd!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Let that sentimental girl realize that -she has been fooled—she'll take her life. That's -certain. And as her hair's long she'll choose the -sea. (<i>away</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>and up</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Unfortunately I've lost my faith in you, -Mollentrave.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>shrugging his shoulders</i>) That, of -course, is a pity.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Am I not justified? See your great -scheme about Everard! She isn't jealous at all.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Has she spoken about him?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Yes—she wants to find him a wife.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> And not a word about Rosamund?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> She thinks Lady Claude flirts with him, -and doesn't seem to like it. But, beyond that—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>triumphantly</i>) Beyond that! And -you complain! Balsted, that's love! The real -girl creeping up, through the cotton wool! My -dear fellow! Couldn't be better! It couldn't indeed!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I don't know—she didn't speak like that -at all. And the boy has been odd—he avoids me—he -doesn't address one word to Margaret—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>with emphasis</i>) The boy follows -the rule! He nurses his passion. Rosamund consoles -him—she always talks about Margaret! -What more do you want? And the girl thinks -they flirt! He watches her hungrily—oh, I've observed -it!—he waits for his hour. You'll see.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>with a gleam of hope</i>) You really -think that? You really think that?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>sits on</i> <span class="smcap">Joseph's</span> <span class="smcap">L.</span>) I give you my -word I never believed matters <i>could</i> be so far advanced.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Then perhaps I had better go on?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>rise.</i> <span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> <i>rises</i>) Would you -turn back, with the harbour lights in sight? -Look here, I'll knock off a fortnight! I ask for<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_66" id="Page_66">[Pg 66]</a></span> -one week more—just one week! And before that's -out you'll have them both on their knees to you.</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Lady Claude</span> <i>comes in</i> <span class="smcap">R. 3 E.</span> <i>and crosses</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) -</p> - -<p>Rosamund, Rosamund! Balsted has been complaining—losing -heart! Tell us about Everard! -He's always talking of Margaret?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>sadly</i>) Always, always! -For hours at a time.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>turning triumphantly to</i> <span class="smcap">Sir -J.</span>) Balsted!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>plaintively</i>) She's a very sweet girl, -and I'm fond of her—but—the subject's beginning -to pall!</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Margaret</span> <i>off cries</i> "<i>Joseph</i>") -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> She's calling you, Balsted.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>down</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>sulkily</i>) Let her call.</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Margaret</span> <i>off louder</i> "<i>Joseph! Joseph!</i>") -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> You must go to her, Balsted! Play -the game. One week more—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I'd rather spend it in gaol, picking -oakum. (<span class="smcap">Margaret</span> <i>off</i>, "<i>Joseph!</i> <span class="smcap">Joseph!!</span>") -Oh, Mollentrave, if it were not for your daughter, -how I'd wish that I never had met you!</p> - -<p class="center">(<i>He goes—miserably</i>—<span class="smcap">R. 3 E.</span>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>coming down</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>shaking his head</i>) -And that man, Rosamund, is one of our most eminent -lawyers!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>down</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Papa, I must tell you—it's -strange—though Everard and I talk of -nothing but Margaret every day, from two till -seven—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Well?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>pathetically</i>) Think of it! From -two till seven—every day!</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_67" id="Page_67">[Pg 67]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Science must have its martyrs! Tell -yourself that you're watching human love wriggle—under -the microscope!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Though he recounts, with minutest -detail, every word she has spoken to him since -they first met—what she said, what he said, how -she looked, what she wore, the gestures she made—still, -and for all that, I have a feeling at times, -a kind of idea—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>waving his arm</i>) My child, you -know my opinion of feminine intuition! In my -book I class it under the head of popular fallacies. -(<i>with a change of voice, and sudden energy</i>) -Rosamund, I imagine the moment to be almost -ripe for my grand coup! (<i>takes</i> <span class="smcap">Lady Claude's</span> -<i>hands and sits her</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>on his</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> What will you do?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>sitting</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>) I shall now proceed to -work on the clay. I will provoke Everard to -frenzy.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> How?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> He knows of course of the month of -probation—he builds on that. To-day he shall -learn that Balsted proposes, at the earliest possible -moment, to lead Margaret to the altar!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>doubtfully</i>) You will tell him that?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> I will. And the result? A scene between -the two young people before which the most -passionate episodes of Romeo and Juliet pale into -insignificance! For I shall also tell Margaret -that <i>you</i> have fallen desperately in love with -Everard!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>protesting</i>) Papa! You will never -say that!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Discreetly—by nods and jerks—oh, -you may trust me! And there ensues—in chemical -parlance—a liberation of two gases—that -meet—and explode!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>rise, up</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) Oh, I hope that they'll<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_68" id="Page_68">[Pg 68]</a></span> -explode soon! See, there he is—under the trees! -He is waiting.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>rise and up</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>) Let him come—I -will leave you. Prepare him, Rosamund—pave -the way—lay down the stones—then I shall come—the -steam roller! I have every confidence in -you, my child.</p> - -<p class="center">(<i>He skips off nimbly</i> <span class="smcap">R. 3 E.</span>—<i>after an instant</i> -<span class="smcap">Everard</span> <i>comes in</i> <span class="smcap">L. 3 E.</span>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) Ah, Everard—my father has -just left me—we were talking of Margaret.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>on her</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>) (<i>indifferently</i>) Ah?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> The sweet girl! How beautiful she -looks to-day!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> She has a certain prettiness—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Oh, Everard, her eyes! I don't think -I ever have seen such eyes! One moment so -tender—another so deep and glowing—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> As your father says, Lady Claude, -those qualities are common to the optic organs of -all mammals. And—let me ask you—<i>why</i> will -you always speak about Margaret?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Because I admire her so much! She -has youth—ah, youth! (<i>sit</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) And besides, -dear Everard, it seems to me that Margaret has -been a favourite topic—with us both!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>sit</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>on her</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>) To-day at least -I decline to talk of her—but of you—only of you.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> There is nothing to say of me, dear -Everard. I—was. Among you young people I -seem to move like a—tradition. Margaret says -the things I used to say—she dreams my dead -dreams. And I am fond of her—because I see in -her—my old self.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>eagerly</i>) That self has not suffered—time -only has mellowed it—wisdom has crowned -it—</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_69" id="Page_69">[Pg 69]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>cheerfully</i>) You must not waste -those pretty speeches on me! And tell me, why -this affected indifference? Do I not know how -passionately you adore her?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>rising</i>) Lady Claude, I will confess -to you, frankly and honestly, there <i>was</i> a -time when I believed I loved Margaret—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>staring</i>) When you believed—!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> As your father observes—quoting -Tolstoy, I think—I was attracted by a well-fitting -jersey and a pair of Paris shoes.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Everard!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> But it was, I need scarcely say, the -merest infatuation—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> What!!!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> Could it have been other—since now -I am conscious—how wholeheartedly I love—you!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>wildly</i>) Me! You love me!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> You. My feeling for Margaret was -immature sex-attraction. At your feet (<i>kneeling -on her</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>) I lay the profound and reasoned devotion—of -a man. Rosamund, I love you. I ask -you to marry me. Be my wife!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>aghast and helpless, rise and cross</i> -<span class="smcap">L.</span>) You can't mean this? (<i>He tries to take her -hand, she rises hurriedly and eludes him.</i> <span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> -<i>comes from</i> <span class="smcap">R. 3 E.</span>) (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) There is your uncle. -Leave us, leave us!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) Why? I will tell him—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> No, no! Go to my father! Let him -know! Please!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> Since you wish it. (<i>He goes up</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>, -<i>passing</i> <span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> <i>haughtily</i>) I shall return for my -answer. (<i>he goes</i>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) He has proposed!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) What!!!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Imagine it! He has fallen in love—with -me!</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_70" id="Page_70">[Pg 70]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>slowly</i>) Everard has fallen—in love—with -you?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Yes! Imagine it! A catastrophe!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>dully, down</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>and sitting</i>) Very -awkward. Very.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) How could one conceive it! -I've been sympathetic—that's all! Talked about -Margaret! Oh, I assure you, I've done nothing -but talk about Margaret!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> There's something odd about boys and -girls nowadays. But, of course, it's all Mollentrave—(<i>he -clenches his fist</i>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> What must I do? Tell me—advise -me!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> You haven't accepted him?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>indignantly</i>) Sir Joseph!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> You see, things are just a trifle topsy-turvy. -My—bride—grows more and more devoted.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> I'm completely bewildered! The poor -boy seemed terribly in earnest—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> So does the poor girl! I'd like to shake -them both in a bag! Well, <i>you'll</i> have a week of -it now.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> How to refuse him without—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> You'd better accept him—why not? -You'll find, we'll both have to marry them. Then, -some day perhaps, they'll elope together—and -Mollentrave on Women will rub his hands and -cry "There!"</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>very distressed</i>) What am I to say -to Everard? Oh, what?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Be senile! Boil your milk!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>indignantly</i>) Sir Joseph! Is this -your sympathy? (<i>sit</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>meekly and deprecatingly, rise and to</i> -<span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) My dear friend, I've had seven days of -Margaret. I thought my brain was fairly strong<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_71" id="Page_71">[Pg 71]</a></span> -—but it's giving. I tell you I'm growing helpless—turning -to pulp—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> But advise me—advise me!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I can't. You know—it sounds absurd—I -did have some hopes of marrying you myself—I -did indeed. (<i>away</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>) Well, now Everard -claims you—and I shall soon be led by Margaret -to the altar, with Miss Treable propping me up -on the other side. We can't do anything—that's -how matters are!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Do you think <i>I</i> will marry Everard?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>helplessly sit</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) I don't know—I -don't think at all. Mollentrave does the thinking—Mollentrave!</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> <i>bustles in, beaming</i>, <span class="smcap">R. 3 E.</span>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) (<i>looking wonderingly from one -to the other</i>) Dear me, why this air of depression?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>both rise and up to knoll</i>) Depression! -Papa! Have you seen Everard?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) I have, this very moment.</p> - -<div class="left"> -<table border="0" cellpadding="4" cellspacing="0" summary="Sir J."> - <tr> - <td><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span></td> - <td rowspan="2" class="bl">(<i>excitedly</i>) Well? Well?</td> - </tr> - <tr> - <td><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span></td> - </tr> -</table></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>looking from one to the other</i>) -Rosamund! Balsted! You surely wouldn't have -me believe that you are not pleased?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>amazed</i>) Pleased!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>emphatically</i>) Yes, sir, I say -pleased—at this magnificent development of my -scheme!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> When Everard wants to marry me!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> And has ceased to love Margaret!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>more in sorrow than in anger</i>) -Amazing! <i>You</i>, Balsted, you—well—you don't -surprise me. But Rosamund—my own child—no, -I should not have believed it!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Did he, or did he not, inform you that -he had proposed to your daughter?</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_72" id="Page_72">[Pg 72]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> He most undoubtedly did.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> And was <i>that</i> what you wanted?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Can you ask? What else?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>reproachfully</i>) Papa! When you -said—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> My dear child, I do not admit even -you into my closest confidence. You have done -your share, both of you—now leave me to do mine.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Will you condescend to inform us—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> You will continue the treatment as -before.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>madly</i>) I am to go on with Margaret—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>calmly</i>) You are.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>helplessly</i>) And—I?—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Will persistently—sympathise—with -Everard.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> But he has proposed! What am I to -do?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Be flattered—in case of need even -affectionate.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>horror stricken</i>) Affectionate! -(<i>away</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>, <i>and sitting</i>.)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Discreetly—remotely—let us say, in -a spiritual and disembodied fashion. You may, -if you wish it, hint at Lord Contareen—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>looking up eagerly</i>) Lord Contareen?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Ah, didn't you know? He and my -daughter—(<span class="smcap">Margaret</span> <i>calls "Joseph" and comes -in with the "Times" in her hand</i>.) Pardon me—there's -the girl. I'll send her away—I have to -give you further instructions. Wait here—I -shan't be a moment.</p> - -<p class="center">(<i>He goes quickly to</i> <span class="smcap">Margaret</span> <i>off</i> <span class="smcap">R. 3 E.</span>, <i>and -walks her off, talking eagerly to her</i>.) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>across to</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>, <i>sitting</i>) (<i>excitedly.</i>) -What is this about Lord Contareen?</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_73" id="Page_73">[Pg 73]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> A foolish creature, whom Papa wishes -me to marry.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>aghast</i>) Marry! What, what! Marry—you!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Yes. And he thinks—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Rosamund! Is there a man in the -world whom you can marry—but me!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Sir Joseph! You said just now—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>kneeling on her</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>) Rosamund, I love -you! I always have loved you! You know it!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>embarrassed</i>) I—I—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> During this diabolic week there has at -least been <i>you</i>! You'll marry me, won't you?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Oh, Sir Joseph, is this the time—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> It is, it is! To the devil with all the -rest! We'll elope!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Elope?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Yes—and leave Mollentrave to settle -matters! Rosamund, tell me!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> What can I tell you? What?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> That you care for me! Will you?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> But you are not free!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>wildly</i>) Not free, not free! But -when I am—as I shall be, I swear it! then—?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Then—oh, then I shall say "yes" -many times!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>rise and raising her</i>) Rosamund—dearest!</p> - -<p class="center">(<i>He rushes towards her—she stays him, with a -gesture.</i>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Hush! He's coming back!</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span> <i>gets back</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>)</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> <i>bustles in</i> <span class="smcap">R. 3 E.</span>, <i>holding the -"Times" in his hand</i>.) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) She was bringing you the<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_74" id="Page_74">[Pg 74]</a></span> -"Times"—here it is—she assures me it has been -warmed and all the microbes boiled out of it! -You <i>are</i> so fussy, Balsted! Here! (<i>He hands -him the paper.</i>)</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span> <i>takes paper, goes up</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) Papa! Does Margaret -know?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> About Everard? Oh yes. And of -course she's indignant. Although she adores our -friend Balsted, she resents the desertion of an ancient -admirer.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>coming down</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) I fail to see how -this helps us.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Balsted, Balsted, you surely -affect this denseness! I've told Everard, by the -way, that he has my full consent and approval.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) Papa!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> That the decision rests with my -daughter—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>cross to</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) With <i>me</i>! What am I -to say to him?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) (<i>whispering to her</i>) We'll -elope!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> In the meantime Balsted will be -good enough to overwhelm Margaret with his -elderly devotion—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I won't!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> You will! Where you were doddery -before, you will now be paralytic! You will, for -the next week, refuse to stir from the house, or -let Margaret do as much as budge from your side!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>ironic</i>) Really?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Yes. And Rosamund does more or -less the same with Everard.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Papa, I can't! I tell you I can't!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> You must! <i>I</i> tell you, you must! -(<span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> <i>goes up</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_75" id="Page_75">[Pg 75]</a></span></p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Margaret</span> <i>calls "Joseph" and appears at the -same place as before</i>. <span class="smcap">Balsted</span> <i>is</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>) -</p> - -<p>(<i>Down</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) The girl again! Balsted, we will -leave you with her. Read your paper—she -mustn't think we've been plotting. Read it, I -say—at present you're simply glaring!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>intercepting</i> <span class="smcap">Margaret</span>—<i>speaking -very gently</i>) Margaret—my dear -Margaret!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>coldly</i>) I congratulate -you, Lady Claude.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> You congratulate me! You believe—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) (<i>sternly</i>) Rosamund, I -want you! Come!</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<i>He marches her off</i> <span class="smcap">L. U. E.</span>, <span class="smcap">Margaret</span> <i>looks scornfully -after her, then sits on the grass, close to</i> -<span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> <i>who holds the paper as a shield</i>.)</p></div> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span> <i>crosses</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>and sits</i>.) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>, <i>reproachfully</i>) Joseph, I -warned you! You refused to take any steps! -Now you see!</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span> <i>turns over the paper wildly</i>.) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> It is unpardonable of them both, -but he, the poor boy, is at least to be pitied. -There really should be a law against elderly women -marrying mere boys! But it's our duty to -do something, isn't it, Joseph? We really can't -stand by and allow him to be so foolish—can we?</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Everard</span> <i>comes in</i>, <span class="smcap">R. 3 E.</span>) -</p> - -<p>Ah, Everard, Everard! We have heard the—news. -Your uncle has something to say to you—haven't -you, Joseph?</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_76" id="Page_76">[Pg 76]</a></span></p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<i>Comes down</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>, <i>taps him on the arm</i>, <span class="smcap">Sir -Joseph</span> <i>suddenly leaps up</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>with a wild -yell</i>)</p></div> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Everard</span> <i>comes down</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> Oh, what is it? Another attack, -Joseph?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>flourishing the paper and pointing to -a paragraph</i>) Here, here, who has done this? -I say, who has done this?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>amazed at his vehemence</i>) Why, -uncle—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>rushing up with smelling salts</i>) -Joseph, you know you should not get excited!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>shaking her off</i>) Leave me alone! -Go away! I want to know how it got into the -papers! (<i>cross to</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) Who said it? Who?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Said what, Joseph dear? -What has happened?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>fiercely</i>) There's an announcement -here that I mean to resign the House, and -give up the Bar!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> Oh! That wretched man must -have put it in!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>glaring at her</i>) Man! What man?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> He called to see you yesterday, -while you were resting. I couldn't disturb you, -of course—so I—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>choking with rage</i>) <i>You</i> saw him? -You?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> And I told him—I was so proud!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> You told him! But it's not true!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>staggering</i>) What!!!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>wild with excitement and fury</i>) No—it's -not true—it's none of it true! Oh, you—idiot!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span> <i>advancing, horror-stricken</i>) -Uncle! How dare you!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>ignoring</i> <span class="smcap">Everard</span> <i>and still glaring at</i><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_77" id="Page_77">[Pg 77]</a></span> -<span class="smcap">Margaret</span>) None of it true! All sham and humbug, -you—wretched little idiot!</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<i>He rushes off wildly</i> <span class="smcap">R. 3 E.</span>, <span class="smcap">Margaret</span> <i>bursts into -a torrent of hysterical sobs, and sinks on to the -seat</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>Everard is deeply moved—following</i> -<span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span> to <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>and then impetuously to her</i>.)</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>deeply pained</i>) Margaret! -Don't cry! Don't!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>between her sobs</i>) Go—go—leave -me! Go to your Lady Claude! Who cares -about me!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>humbly</i>) Margaret!!!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> He has deceived me—I see it all -now! The cottage in the country—the beautiful -book—(<i>wringing her hands</i>) (<i>rise and cross</i> -<span class="smcap">L.</span>) Oh, <i>can</i> men be so wicked!</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Everard</span> <i>follows her</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) -</p> - -<p>(<i>Feebly</i>) It was so sweet—his giving up all—for -me! His being so helpless, and wanting me, -so much! And now—oh, wretched girl that I am! -(<i>her sobs burst forth afresh, go up</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>and sit, -pushing</i> <span class="smcap">Everard</span> <i>away</i>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Margaret! Don't! I -can't stand it!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> The wickedness of it! Oh, the -wickedness!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> But you loved him! You told me -you loved him! When he proposed—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> It was such a surprise—and I was -so flattered! But love! How could I love—an -old man!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>more and more bewildered, sits up</i> -<span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>on her</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>) Margaret!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> An—ugly—old man!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> What—what!</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_78" id="Page_78">[Pg 78]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> And I—I admired him, of course. -But I confess that at first—only then, when Mr. -Mollentrave told me of all his diseases—Everard! -His heart isn't weak?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>rise</i>) No!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> His limbs aren't feeble?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> Not in the least!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> He's not even asthmatic?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> No more than I am!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>raising her hands pathetically to -Heaven</i>) Oh!!! And yet how great his love must -be, for him to have stooped to this!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>scornfully</i>) His love! He has -called you an idiot! You!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>sobbing again</i>) Yes—a wretched—little—idiot! -And what had I done to deserve -it! (<span class="smcap">Everard</span> <i>sits</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) Oh, leave me, leave me! -Go to your Lady Claude!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>trembling with excitement</i>) You -can't marry him now!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> Will he let me escape, do you think? -All this week, the hungry love in his eyes!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> But you—if you don't love him?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> I loved what I <i>thought</i> was him. -And I—I am faithful—<i>I</i> do not change—<i>I</i> don't -says things to one woman one week and then make -love to another! Why do you stay here, Everard? -Your bride is waiting!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>desperately</i>) Do you think <i>I</i> want -to marry Lady Claude?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>scornfully</i>) Would you have proposed -to her, if you didn't?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> I proposed out of pique, because -you—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>excitedly</i>) What, what!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> I read Mr. Mollentrave's wicked -book, and believed it! Oh, Margaret, Margaret, -can you think that any other woman in the -world—</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_79" id="Page_79">[Pg 79]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>trembling</i>) Then—then—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> I always have loved you—always—always! -But when I found that you—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> I see it all! You proposed to Lady -Claude—for my sake!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> I was so unhappy!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> And you <i>don't</i> love her? Then I -have ruined your life!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> It's not too late!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> It is—it is! Can we break both -their hearts? Oh, Everard—we must be noble!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> Poor Lady Claude! I'm afraid I've -been very cruel!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> And your uncle—think of your -uncle! Imagine if he—suspected! The blow to -him! No, no, we mustn't, we can't. We must -make the sacrifice, Everard! We must do what -is right!</p> - -<p class="center">(<i>Leaning against each other.</i>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> But tell me, at least! You <i>do</i> love -me?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> Oh, Everard, I always have loved -you—but I didn't know!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>desperately</i>) I don't want to -marry Lady Claude!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> Nor I your uncle! But we must! -They love us, the poor old things!</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<i>They fall into each other's arms.</i> <span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> -<i>comes in briskly</i> <span class="smcap">L. U. E.</span> <i>and stares, in utter -amazement</i>)</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>triumphantly</i>) Ah! The liberation -of two gases, that meet, and explode!</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Everard</span> <i>and</i> <span class="smcap">Margaret</span> <i>turn, horror-stricken, and -rise</i>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>releasing</i> <span class="smcap">Margaret</span>) Mr. -Mollentrave! Oh!!!</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_80" id="Page_80">[Pg 80]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>down</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>shamefaced</i>) You -mustn't think—oh, you mustn't! We were -merely bidding each other good-bye!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) That of course was evident! -But, Everard—for a man who half-an-hour ago -proposed to my daughter—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>miserably</i>) Mr. Mollentrave!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Are there many other young ladies—whom -you have to say good-bye to, Everard?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> Be merciful, sir! Oh, Mr. Mollentrave. -I love Margaret! (<i>going to her</i>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>reproachfully</i>) Everard!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> I do, I do! And she loves me! Oh, -Mr. Mollentrave, help us!</p> - -<p class="center">(<i>Both kneel</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>holding hands</i>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> Yes, yes, help us!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> What a position for a father! When -I think of my Rosamund—the blow to her! And -Balsted—poor, doting Balsted!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>crawling towards</i> <span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span>, -<i>humbly</i>) We've been very wicked, we know! -But we'll do what you tell us!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>both rise</i>) Arise, my children! <i>I</i> -will befriend you!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Oh, Mr. Mollentrave, you -are the noblest of men!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>down</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) The best, the -kindest!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) (<i>raising them both</i>) I will -break the dreadful news to them—ah, very gently—We -must not be brutal! Not a word to them -yet—They must hear it from me!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> Yes—oh yes!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Oh, the cruelty of youth! Go now—go—let -me consider what had best be done.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>seizing his hand and wringing it</i>) -How to thank you!</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_81" id="Page_81">[Pg 81]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>caressing the other hand</i>) Dear -Mr. Mollentrave!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Whatever it cost me, you have my -promise!</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<i>They go off, hand-in-hand</i> <span class="smcap">R. 2 E.</span> <i>Left alone</i>, -<span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> <i>laughs quietly to himself, and -expresses his supreme satisfaction by a kind of -elderly dance</i>. <span class="smcap">Dexter</span> <i>comes in</i> <span class="smcap">R. 2 E.</span> <i>with a -telegram, and stares</i>.)</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Mr. Mollentrave!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>with dignity</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span>) Dexter, this exhibition -of agility may seem undignified, but it is -symbolic of a certain inward feeling of legitimate -pride.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> (<i>puzzled</i>) Sir?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Dexter, I have done it—like that! -(<i>he snaps his fingers</i>) I waved my wand—and -they walked—I piped, and they danced! (<i>to</i> -<span class="smcap">Dexter</span> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>speaking with profound conviction</i>) -Dexter there are moments when my power strikes -me as somewhat uncanny....</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) May I ask, sir—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> No, no, these matters are not for you.—What -have you there?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> A telegram, sir. The boy is waiting.</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Dexter</span> <i>hands him the telegram</i>.) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>fumbling for his glasses</i>) Yes—a -little uncanny! (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) But—fortunately for mankind, -I make a good use of that power! (<i>He adjusts -his spectacles, opens the telegram, and -reads</i>) What, what!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) No bad news, sir, I hope?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) (<i>fuming</i>) Contareen! The -ass, the triple ass! Engaged to Lady Gladys. I -am d—— (<i>going up</i> <span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>and down</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_82" id="Page_82">[Pg 82]</a></span></p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> Sir?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> And he gloats! He dares to gloat!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Any answer, sir? I have -brought a form.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Answer—no—no answer! Stay, -though—there <i>shall</i> be—yes, there <i>shall</i>! Ah, he -gloats, does he, that—moon-calf! Write, Dexter,—write! -Sit here and write!</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Dexter</span> <i>sits</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) -</p> - -<p>"Delighted at news. My daughter and Sir -Joseph Balsted, who were engaged yesterday"—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> (<i>open-mouthed</i>) Sir???</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>pettishly</i>) I say, who were engaged -yesterday—"join in congratulations." -Have you got it?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> Do I understand you to say—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> You do, sir—you do! Is that down?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> Yes, sir. "My daughter and Sir -Joseph Balsted, who were engaged yesterday, join -in congratulations."</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> Good. Now take that telegram, give -it to the boy—and mind, not a word to anyone -here! (<i>down</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> (<i>going</i>) Very well, sir. (<i>is going</i> -<span class="smcap">R. 2 E.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Stay, I had better make sure. -Give me the telegram, Dexter—I'll hand it to the -boy myself. And do you go off, through that gate, -and take the next train back to town.</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Dexter</span> <i>crosses</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Dexter.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) Sir! Don't you trust my -discretion?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) Implicitly, Dexter—but I -prefer to know it's in London. Go at once, please. -I shall let you know when to return.</p> - -<p><span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_83" id="Page_83">[Pg 83]</a></span></p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Dexter</span> <i>goes through the gate</i>, <span class="smcap">L. U. E.</span>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span> <i>and down</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) (<i>moving off</i>) -More work for my hands! But can I let that -creature gloat? (<i>is going up</i> <span class="smcap">R. 3 E.</span>)</p> - -<p class="center">(<i>As he goes, he meets</i> <span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span> <i>and</i> <span class="smcap">Lady -Claude</span>.) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>pushing between them</i>) Ah, Balsted, -Rosamund, wait for me here. I have news—strange -news! I shall be back in a moment! -(<i>he goes</i> <span class="smcap">R. 3 E.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>coming down stage on her</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>slowly -walking down</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>and across</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) News! Some -fresh scheme, no doubt! We have done with him—done! -Rosamund, I'll go now to the post-office, -and wire my clerk to get a special license—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> No, no, it's impossible! Oh, Joseph, -think of our eternal remorse—if anything happened!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Remorse! I tell you, if we stay here, -we shall both of us be caught!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> We should never have lent ourselves -to this deception!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> It's too late now to moan over things! -Your father's responsible for it all—let him put -things right!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Think of poor Margaret! Ninety-nine -girls out of a hundred, I said—what if she -be the hundredth?</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I don't care if she be the thousandth! -I won't marry her!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> And Everard! The blow to him! -Oh, how can I have been so blind!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> He and Margaret will console each -other!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<span class="smcap">L.</span>) Oh Joseph, Joseph, they are so -young, but youth can know sorrow! Margaret<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_84" id="Page_84">[Pg 84]</a></span> -adores you—and I—oh, what have I done to poor -Everard!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) I don't care, I don't care! I -tell you—</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Everard</span> <i>and</i> <span class="smcap">Margaret</span> <i>come in</i> <span class="smcap">R. 2 E.</span>; <i>they -start at seeing the others</i>.) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> Look, look! Here they are!</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<i>A panic falls on all four of them; they eye each -other furtively, and both pairs stand whispering -at opposite corners of the stage.</i>)</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>down</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span> <i>to</i> <span class="smcap">Everard</span> <i>down</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>) -They've seen us—we can't go back.</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>to</i> <span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span> <i>up</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) -Ah, Joseph! The poor little girl!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>to</i> <span class="smcap">Margaret</span>) He can't have told -them yet!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>to</i> <span class="smcap">Everard</span>) Oh no—impossible! -But—how sad they are! As though they suspected!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>to</i> <span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span>) The poor boy, the -poor boy! We must be very gentle!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>to</i> <span class="smcap">Margaret</span>) I've behaved very -cruelly to poor Lady Claude!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>to</i> <span class="smcap">Lady Claude</span>) I'm afraid Margaret -has been crying—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>to</i> <span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span>) It will break her -heart when she knows—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>to</i> <span class="smcap">Margaret</span>) Why not tell them? -This is a chance—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<i>to</i> <span class="smcap">Everard</span>) Oh, think of the -shock! Your poor uncle! Oh, my heart fails -me!</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<i>They fall into whispers.</i> <span class="smcap">Mollentrave</span> <i>comes in, -and chuckles at finding them all together. -<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_85" id="Page_85">[Pg 85]</a></span>Both couples start guiltily and try to go</i>, <span class="smcap">Margaret</span> -<i>and</i> <span class="smcap">Everard</span> <span class="smcap">R. 2 E.</span>, <span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span> <i>and</i> <span class="smcap">Lady -Claude</span> <span class="smcap">L. 2 E.</span>)</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) No, no, don't go—sit down -please—I've something to say to you—all!</p> - -<div class="hangindent"> - -<p>(<i>They sit all of them in the greatest embarrassment, -avoiding each other's eyes</i>, <span class="smcap">Margaret</span> <i>and</i> -<span class="smcap">Everard</span> <span class="smcap">R.</span> <i>and</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>, <span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span> <i>up</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>, <span class="smcap">Lady -Claude</span> <i>down</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>)</p></div> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) (<i>striking an attitude</i>) The -poets have babbled of love since the first introduction -of rhyme;—but all that we know, or need -know, is that Cupid is—young! (<i>he turns to</i> <span class="smcap">Sir -Joseph</span>) Balsted! The elderly fisherman baits -his fat hook and thinks he has landed the salmon—down -below, a barefoot boy wades in, and captures -the prize! As a lover, Balsted, you have -every quality—every one in the world that appeals -to a beautiful girl—every one, with the exception -of youth!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Margaret.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) (<i>falling on her knees before</i> -<span class="smcap">Sir Joseph</span>) Forgive me!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>staggered</i>) Margaret! (<i>crosses to</i> -<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>)</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>down</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) You <i>must</i> forgive her! -Balsted, it was your brain, your massive brain, -that attracted poor Margaret—but to-day, as she -sat beside Everard, two pair of lips met, quite by -chance—and your brain was forgotten!</p> - -<p class="center">(<span class="smcap">Lady Claude</span> <i>still sitting</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Everard.</span> (<i>rising</i> <span class="smcap">R.</span>) (<i>appealingly</i>) Lady -Claude!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) Rosamund, you too will pardon, -and grant absolution. Rosamund, Balsted,<span class="pagenum"><a name="Page_86" id="Page_86">[Pg 86]</a></span> -rise to superior heights—and, from your loftiness, -smile on our lovers!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) Margaret, you are free!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Marg.</span> (<span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) What! <i>Can</i> you!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> I release you!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">L. C.</span>) Go now, my children—leave -me—to pour balm on their wounds!</p> - -<p class="center">(<i>He waves them off; they rush out gleefully, -hand in hand</i>, <span class="smcap">R. 2 E.</span>) -</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> (<i>up</i> <span class="smcap">R. C.</span>) A miracle! But how—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) The infallible working of an -undeviating law!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Mollentrave, I love your daughter. And -she—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Lady C.</span> (<i>rising and to</i> <span class="smcap">L.</span> <i>of</i> <span class="smcap">Mollen.</span>) Papa, -this will be a disappointment to you, I know. But -I—</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<span class="smcap">C.</span>) Disappointment! The dearest -wish of my heart!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> What!!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> My scheme of schemes, at which I -have labored since first I set eyes on our friend! -Every single event, all that has happened, was -merely the inlay, the minute fragments that dovetailed—and -produced this!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Sir J.</span> Marvellous! Mollentrave, I have no -words—to express my admiration!</p> - -<p><span class="smcap">Mollen.</span> (<i>taking</i> <span class="smcap">Sir Joseph's</span> <i>hand and placing -it in</i> <span class="smcap">Lady Claude's</span>) After all, my dear fellow, -what is it? A little knowledge of human -nature!</p> - -<p class="center">CURTAIN. -</p> - - -<ul><li><span class="smcap">Mollentrave.</span></li> - -<li><span class="smcap">Sir Joseph.</span></li> - -<li><span class="smcap">Lady Claude.</span></li> -</ul> - -<div id="transnote"> - -<div class="chapter"></div> -<hr class="chap" /> - - - - -<h2><a name="TRANSCRIBERS_NOTES" id="TRANSCRIBERS_NOTES">TRANSCRIBER'S NOTES</a></h2> - - -<p>Silently corrected simple spelling, grammar, and typographical errors.</p> - -<p>Retained anachronistic and non-standard spellings as printed.</p> - -</div> - - - - - - - - -<pre> - - - - - -End of the Project Gutenberg EBook of Mollentrave on Women; A comedy in -three acts, by Alfred Sutro - -*** END OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK MOLLENTRAVE ON WOMEN *** - -***** This file should be named 50099-h.htm or 50099-h.zip ***** -This and all associated files of various formats will be found in: - http://www.gutenberg.org/5/0/0/9/50099/ - -Produced by Richard Tonsing, Clarity and the Online -Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This -file was produced from images generously made available -by The Internet Archive/American Libraries.) - -Updated editions will replace the previous one--the old editions will -be renamed. - -Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright -law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works, -so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United -States without permission and without paying copyright -royalties. Special rules, set forth in the General Terms of Use part -of this license, apply to copying and distributing Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works to protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG-tm -concept and trademark. Project Gutenberg is a registered trademark, -and may not be used if you charge for the eBooks, unless you receive -specific permission. If you do not charge anything for copies of this -eBook, complying with the rules is very easy. You may use this eBook -for nearly any purpose such as creation of derivative works, reports, -performances and research. They may be modified and printed and given -away--you may do practically ANYTHING in the United States with eBooks -not protected by U.S. copyright law. Redistribution is subject to the -trademark license, especially commercial redistribution. - -START: FULL LICENSE - -THE FULL PROJECT GUTENBERG LICENSE -PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU DISTRIBUTE OR USE THIS WORK - -To protect the Project Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting the free -distribution of electronic works, by using or distributing this work -(or any other work associated in any way with the phrase "Project -Gutenberg"), you agree to comply with all the terms of the Full -Project Gutenberg-tm License available with this file or online at -www.gutenberg.org/license. - -Section 1. General Terms of Use and Redistributing Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works - -1.A. By reading or using any part of this Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic work, you indicate that you have read, understand, agree to -and accept all the terms of this license and intellectual property -(trademark/copyright) agreement. If you do not agree to abide by all -the terms of this agreement, you must cease using and return or -destroy all copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in your -possession. If you paid a fee for obtaining a copy of or access to a -Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work and you do not agree to be bound -by the terms of this agreement, you may obtain a refund from the -person or entity to whom you paid the fee as set forth in paragraph -1.E.8. - -1.B. "Project Gutenberg" is a registered trademark. It may only be -used on or associated in any way with an electronic work by people who -agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement. There are a few -things that you can do with most Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works -even without complying with the full terms of this agreement. See -paragraph 1.C below. There are a lot of things you can do with Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic works if you follow the terms of this -agreement and help preserve free future access to Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic works. See paragraph 1.E below. - -1.C. The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation ("the -Foundation" or PGLAF), owns a compilation copyright in the collection -of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works. Nearly all the individual -works in the collection are in the public domain in the United -States. If an individual work is unprotected by copyright law in the -United States and you are located in the United States, we do not -claim a right to prevent you from copying, distributing, performing, -displaying or creating derivative works based on the work as long as -all references to Project Gutenberg are removed. Of course, we hope -that you will support the Project Gutenberg-tm mission of promoting -free access to electronic works by freely sharing Project Gutenberg-tm -works in compliance with the terms of this agreement for keeping the -Project Gutenberg-tm name associated with the work. You can easily -comply with the terms of this agreement by keeping this work in the -same format with its attached full Project Gutenberg-tm License when -you share it without charge with others. - -1.D. The copyright laws of the place where you are located also govern -what you can do with this work. Copyright laws in most countries are -in a constant state of change. If you are outside the United States, -check the laws of your country in addition to the terms of this -agreement before downloading, copying, displaying, performing, -distributing or creating derivative works based on this work or any -other Project Gutenberg-tm work. The Foundation makes no -representations concerning the copyright status of any work in any -country outside the United States. - -1.E. Unless you have removed all references to Project Gutenberg: - -1.E.1. The following sentence, with active links to, or other -immediate access to, the full Project Gutenberg-tm License must appear -prominently whenever any copy of a Project Gutenberg-tm work (any work -on which the phrase "Project Gutenberg" appears, or with which the -phrase "Project Gutenberg" is associated) is accessed, displayed, -performed, viewed, copied or distributed: - - This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and - most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no - restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it - under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included with this - eBook or online at www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the - United States, you'll have to check the laws of the country where you - are located before using this ebook. - -1.E.2. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is -derived from texts not protected by U.S. copyright law (does not -contain a notice indicating that it is posted with permission of the -copyright holder), the work can be copied and distributed to anyone in -the United States without paying any fees or charges. If you are -redistributing or providing access to a work with the phrase "Project -Gutenberg" associated with or appearing on the work, you must comply -either with the requirements of paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 or -obtain permission for the use of the work and the Project Gutenberg-tm -trademark as set forth in paragraphs 1.E.8 or 1.E.9. - -1.E.3. If an individual Project Gutenberg-tm electronic work is posted -with the permission of the copyright holder, your use and distribution -must comply with both paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 and any -additional terms imposed by the copyright holder. Additional terms -will be linked to the Project Gutenberg-tm License for all works -posted with the permission of the copyright holder found at the -beginning of this work. - -1.E.4. Do not unlink or detach or remove the full Project Gutenberg-tm -License terms from this work, or any files containing a part of this -work or any other work associated with Project Gutenberg-tm. - -1.E.5. Do not copy, display, perform, distribute or redistribute this -electronic work, or any part of this electronic work, without -prominently displaying the sentence set forth in paragraph 1.E.1 with -active links or immediate access to the full terms of the Project -Gutenberg-tm License. - -1.E.6. You may convert to and distribute this work in any binary, -compressed, marked up, nonproprietary or proprietary form, including -any word processing or hypertext form. However, if you provide access -to or distribute copies of a Project Gutenberg-tm work in a format -other than "Plain Vanilla ASCII" or other format used in the official -version posted on the official Project Gutenberg-tm web site -(www.gutenberg.org), you must, at no additional cost, fee or expense -to the user, provide a copy, a means of exporting a copy, or a means -of obtaining a copy upon request, of the work in its original "Plain -Vanilla ASCII" or other form. Any alternate format must include the -full Project Gutenberg-tm License as specified in paragraph 1.E.1. - -1.E.7. Do not charge a fee for access to, viewing, displaying, -performing, copying or distributing any Project Gutenberg-tm works -unless you comply with paragraph 1.E.8 or 1.E.9. - -1.E.8. You may charge a reasonable fee for copies of or providing -access to or distributing Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works -provided that - -* You pay a royalty fee of 20% of the gross profits you derive from - the use of Project Gutenberg-tm works calculated using the method - you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. The fee is owed - to the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm trademark, but he has - agreed to donate royalties under this paragraph to the Project - Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation. Royalty payments must be paid - within 60 days following each date on which you prepare (or are - legally required to prepare) your periodic tax returns. Royalty - payments should be clearly marked as such and sent to the Project - Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation at the address specified in - Section 4, "Information about donations to the Project Gutenberg - Literary Archive Foundation." - -* You provide a full refund of any money paid by a user who notifies - you in writing (or by e-mail) within 30 days of receipt that s/he - does not agree to the terms of the full Project Gutenberg-tm - License. You must require such a user to return or destroy all - copies of the works possessed in a physical medium and discontinue - all use of and all access to other copies of Project Gutenberg-tm - works. - -* You provide, in accordance with paragraph 1.F.3, a full refund of - any money paid for a work or a replacement copy, if a defect in the - electronic work is discovered and reported to you within 90 days of - receipt of the work. - -* You comply with all other terms of this agreement for free - distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm works. - -1.E.9. If you wish to charge a fee or distribute a Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic work or group of works on different terms than -are set forth in this agreement, you must obtain permission in writing -from both the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation and The -Project Gutenberg Trademark LLC, the owner of the Project Gutenberg-tm -trademark. Contact the Foundation as set forth in Section 3 below. - -1.F. - -1.F.1. Project Gutenberg volunteers and employees expend considerable -effort to identify, do copyright research on, transcribe and proofread -works not protected by U.S. copyright law in creating the Project -Gutenberg-tm collection. Despite these efforts, Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic works, and the medium on which they may be stored, may -contain "Defects," such as, but not limited to, incomplete, inaccurate -or corrupt data, transcription errors, a copyright or other -intellectual property infringement, a defective or damaged disk or -other medium, a computer virus, or computer codes that damage or -cannot be read by your equipment. - -1.F.2. LIMITED WARRANTY, DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES - Except for the "Right -of Replacement or Refund" described in paragraph 1.F.3, the Project -Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the owner of the Project -Gutenberg-tm trademark, and any other party distributing a Project -Gutenberg-tm electronic work under this agreement, disclaim all -liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal -fees. YOU AGREE THAT YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE, STRICT -LIABILITY, BREACH OF WARRANTY OR BREACH OF CONTRACT EXCEPT THOSE -PROVIDED IN PARAGRAPH 1.F.3. YOU AGREE THAT THE FOUNDATION, THE -TRADEMARK OWNER, AND ANY DISTRIBUTOR UNDER THIS AGREEMENT WILL NOT BE -LIABLE TO YOU FOR ACTUAL, DIRECT, INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR -INCIDENTAL DAMAGES EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH -DAMAGE. - -1.F.3. LIMITED RIGHT OF REPLACEMENT OR REFUND - If you discover a -defect in this electronic work within 90 days of receiving it, you can -receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending a -written explanation to the person you received the work from. If you -received the work on a physical medium, you must return the medium -with your written explanation. The person or entity that provided you -with the defective work may elect to provide a replacement copy in -lieu of a refund. If you received the work electronically, the person -or entity providing it to you may choose to give you a second -opportunity to receive the work electronically in lieu of a refund. If -the second copy is also defective, you may demand a refund in writing -without further opportunities to fix the problem. - -1.F.4. Except for the limited right of replacement or refund set forth -in paragraph 1.F.3, this work is provided to you 'AS-IS', WITH NO -OTHER WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT -LIMITED TO WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY OR FITNESS FOR ANY PURPOSE. - -1.F.5. Some states do not allow disclaimers of certain implied -warranties or the exclusion or limitation of certain types of -damages. If any disclaimer or limitation set forth in this agreement -violates the law of the state applicable to this agreement, the -agreement shall be interpreted to make the maximum disclaimer or -limitation permitted by the applicable state law. The invalidity or -unenforceability of any provision of this agreement shall not void the -remaining provisions. - -1.F.6. INDEMNITY - You agree to indemnify and hold the Foundation, the -trademark owner, any agent or employee of the Foundation, anyone -providing copies of Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works in -accordance with this agreement, and any volunteers associated with the -production, promotion and distribution of Project Gutenberg-tm -electronic works, harmless from all liability, costs and expenses, -including legal fees, that arise directly or indirectly from any of -the following which you do or cause to occur: (a) distribution of this -or any Project Gutenberg-tm work, (b) alteration, modification, or -additions or deletions to any Project Gutenberg-tm work, and (c) any -Defect you cause. - -Section 2. Information about the Mission of Project Gutenberg-tm - -Project Gutenberg-tm is synonymous with the free distribution of -electronic works in formats readable by the widest variety of -computers including obsolete, old, middle-aged and new computers. It -exists because of the efforts of hundreds of volunteers and donations -from people in all walks of life. - -Volunteers and financial support to provide volunteers with the -assistance they need are critical to reaching Project Gutenberg-tm's -goals and ensuring that the Project Gutenberg-tm collection will -remain freely available for generations to come. In 2001, the Project -Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation was created to provide a secure -and permanent future for Project Gutenberg-tm and future -generations. To learn more about the Project Gutenberg Literary -Archive Foundation and how your efforts and donations can help, see -Sections 3 and 4 and the Foundation information page at -www.gutenberg.org - - - -Section 3. Information about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation - -The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation is a non profit -501(c)(3) educational corporation organized under the laws of the -state of Mississippi and granted tax exempt status by the Internal -Revenue Service. The Foundation's EIN or federal tax identification -number is 64-6221541. Contributions to the Project Gutenberg Literary -Archive Foundation are tax deductible to the full extent permitted by -U.S. federal laws and your state's laws. - -The Foundation's principal office is in Fairbanks, Alaska, with the -mailing address: PO Box 750175, Fairbanks, AK 99775, but its -volunteers and employees are scattered throughout numerous -locations. Its business office is located at 809 North 1500 West, Salt -Lake City, UT 84116, (801) 596-1887. Email contact links and up to -date contact information can be found at the Foundation's web site and -official page at www.gutenberg.org/contact - -For additional contact information: - - Dr. Gregory B. Newby - Chief Executive and Director - gbnewby@pglaf.org - -Section 4. Information about Donations to the Project Gutenberg -Literary Archive Foundation - -Project Gutenberg-tm depends upon and cannot survive without wide -spread public support and donations to carry out its mission of -increasing the number of public domain and licensed works that can be -freely distributed in machine readable form accessible by the widest -array of equipment including outdated equipment. Many small donations -($1 to $5,000) are particularly important to maintaining tax exempt -status with the IRS. - -The Foundation is committed to complying with the laws regulating -charities and charitable donations in all 50 states of the United -States. Compliance requirements are not uniform and it takes a -considerable effort, much paperwork and many fees to meet and keep up -with these requirements. We do not solicit donations in locations -where we have not received written confirmation of compliance. To SEND -DONATIONS or determine the status of compliance for any particular -state visit www.gutenberg.org/donate - -While we cannot and do not solicit contributions from states where we -have not met the solicitation requirements, we know of no prohibition -against accepting unsolicited donations from donors in such states who -approach us with offers to donate. - -International donations are gratefully accepted, but we cannot make -any statements concerning tax treatment of donations received from -outside the United States. U.S. laws alone swamp our small staff. - -Please check the Project Gutenberg Web pages for current donation -methods and addresses. Donations are accepted in a number of other -ways including checks, online payments and credit card donations. To -donate, please visit: www.gutenberg.org/donate - -Section 5. General Information About Project Gutenberg-tm electronic works. - -Professor Michael S. Hart was the originator of the Project -Gutenberg-tm concept of a library of electronic works that could be -freely shared with anyone. For forty years, he produced and -distributed Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks with only a loose network of -volunteer support. - -Project Gutenberg-tm eBooks are often created from several printed -editions, all of which are confirmed as not protected by copyright in -the U.S. unless a copyright notice is included. Thus, we do not -necessarily keep eBooks in compliance with any particular paper -edition. - -Most people start at our Web site which has the main PG search -facility: www.gutenberg.org - -This Web site includes information about Project Gutenberg-tm, -including how to make donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary -Archive Foundation, how to help produce our new eBooks, and how to -subscribe to our email newsletter to hear about new eBooks. - - - -</pre> - -</body> -</html> |